#and it just gets worse when he sees estelle living the life he always dreamed of

[reefs-camp-blog]

sally and percy were always each other’s constants, they became a bit more distant once percy found out he was a demigod, but they were still each others firsts

then estelle was born

percy loves estelle so much, so much it physically hurts

but he sees estelle and how happy she is, how she had a mom that doesnt work the night shift nearly every night and instead is home nearly all the time, and she has a dad that’s present and there and is safe and percy is so so happy that she has what he never did

but at the same time he knows thats the exact reason why it hurts

estelle has what percys wanted his whole life

and now estelle has the only thing percy had his whole life

being his mothers first and top priority

he knows why, he understands why, estelle is a baby and needs to be cared for constantly, and percys nearly 18 and doesnt need his mom all the time anymore

but it hurts because all the food is no longer blue, it hurts because he sees estelle grow up and get help, it hurts because he sees estelle with the life he always wanted, but knows he will never had

and it hurts because hes no longer his mother’s constant.

sally has paul now, she has paul to help her through her issues and she has a child that doesnt get expelled from every school shes been in

and percy has his family. but its not the same. annabeth has always been there, but she doesnt understand, thalia has been through the same childhood as percy but she doesnt know what its like to watch the bad go to good in the same household, grover has always listened but he just doesnt understand

because hes happy estelle has the life he always wanted. hes glad his mother has the life she always wanted. but hes not in that life. because hes moving out soon. and hes no longer his mothers son, at least not in the way he was before

[pjohoo-reclists]

Outsider POV Fic Recs

A list of fics where mortals get glimpses of the greek world and/or demigods. Last updated on 8/8/23. Enjoy!

This is War by Tibbitoo

Gen | 1.1k | Complete

Percy Jackson & Paul Blofis

Titan War, Violence, Angst

Because even though the movies get it all wrong, Paul Blofis knows. War is war, and seeing those demigods fighting for their lives, seeing the fallen on the ground, made him finally understand. This wasn't a dream, but a cruel reality where Good and Evil clashed in a bloody battle. This wasn't a book where Good always won. This was a real war. It was reality. His stepson's reality.

Start Over by RainKiss

Gen | 1.5k | Complete

background Percy Jackson/Annabeth Chase

Goode High School, poor education system, Paul is a good dad

Mr. Morelli is not a nervous person by character, but the file in front of him gives the scholastic transgressions of the new kid, who has been allowed to attend Goode High school—the place where he works.

Um.... Oops? by grainjew

Gen | 2.8k | Complete

background Percy Jackson/Annabeth Chase

Identity Reveal, Post TLO, Pre HoO

Scarlet Williams, sophomore at Goode High School, was stretched out in the back of her friend Percy's car when a twelve year old materialized in the passenger seat. The next thing she knew, apparently Greek mythology was real and liked trying to kill her friend. Great.

Riding on the Rolling Tide by mrthology

T | 3k | Complete

Jason Grace & Percy Jackson

AU, Slice of Life, Crack Treated Seriously

“I think that’s Percy Jackson!” “Who?” Sarah rolled her eyes. “The kid who jumped off the St Louis arch years ago, and then there was all that weirdness,” she added, waving her hands for effect, “with a kidnapping or something.” “Oh, the one that’s a demigod?” “Yeah,” she said. She still wasn’t sure if she believed in gods or demigods, but it was hard to deny it at this point. Monsters and worse walked among them, and Sarah hated it. At first, she’d thought it was some strange publicity stunt for an upcoming show or movie—studios had done stranger things to draw crowds, after all—but she knew better now. Gods were real, and so were monsters. ... After the Second Giant War, the Mist falls. The results aren't what anyone expected.

Someone to You by mrthology

Gen | 3k | Complete

Percy Jackson, Triton, Amphitrite, Paul Blofis' Parents, Estelle Blofis

Triton is a Good Sibling, Big Brother Percy, Slice of Life

Anna wasn't sure what to think of Percy Jackson, truth be told, having only met him twice. She adored her daughter in law Sally and her little granddaughter, but there was something about Percy that put her on edge. She had no idea what - he was a kind boy, eager to help with his baby sister when most teenagers would run for the hills and clearly adored his mother - but there was just something about him, something about his too-bright eyes that made her feel uneasy. ~~~ Or, Paul's parents are taking care of Estelle for a few days. When picking her up, they meet Percy again as well as his older brother (what was his name? Tri?). At this point, Anna just wants to know what the dad looks like to have kids that look like THIS. Especially when, several days later, they meet the stepmother as well.

Here On The Sunny Side by mrthology

Gen | 4k | Complete

Percy Jackson/Apollo

Post Trials of Apollo, New Rome University, Attempt at Humor

“Just talk to him.” Cody blinked. He could do a lot of things, but approaching Percy Jackson and just talking to him was not one of those things. “We can’t just go and talk to him!” Aida yelped, shifting nervously in her seat. Cody agreed. Percy Jackson was nothing if not intimidating. He’d done so much for Camp Jupiter and walked with more gods than Cody could begin to fathom. There were even rumours that Jupiter (or, Cody supposed, Zeus) had offered him godhood when he’d only been sixteen. Everyone in New Rome knew he spent time in his father’s realm below the sea, and even the Praetors seemed to defer to him at times. No. Cody couldn’t just go up and talk to Percy Jackson. Not many in New Rome would dare. ——— Or, Percy’s part of a group project at NRU. His group mates aren’t exactly sure what to make of him. Or of his mysterious paramour.

A Thin Barrier Between Two Worlds by Skywalking_through_life

T | 5.7k | Complete

Percy Jackson, Hudson River Spirit

Post Gaea & Second Giant War, Canon Compliant, Eavesdropping

"'Man, If I avoided everyone with a bone to pick with me, I'd be a hermit. But I haven't figured out what I'm supposed to have actually done this time?" He could only see half of Percy's face, and even that at a distance, but there was no mistaking the lazy smirk he was wearing, or the way his arms were casually folded across his chest. He wasn't scared of this guy, which didn't make a lick of sense, because just the guy's voice was scaring Giovanni. What could the rest of him look like? "Don't play stupid, kid, it ain't a good look for you. You know good and well what you did." A sudden thud shook the wood of the old dock, making it creak and sway and causing bits of plank to fall. When the dust cleared, Giovanni bit down hard on his tongue to stop himself from gasping, because now that he could see both people above him, he wasn't sure the person opposite Percy was, in fact, human. In which Giovanni learns that there is such a thing as knowing too much about the world around him...

The Overwhelming Specter of Your Mothers Book Club by 60sec400

Not Rated | 5.9k Complete

Sally Jackson/Paul Blofis

Meeting the Parents, Sally Jackson is a Good Parent, Oneshot

Martha Blofis stared at her son in shock. “What do you mean,” she said slowly, “that you’re married?” Her son fidgeted nervously. First, he ran a hand through his peppered hair, and then his eyes flickered down and away. Then he lifted them again and smiled meekly at her. “Paul,” she said, “I need you to tell me what in gods name you were thinking.” “Her name is Sally Jackson?” Paul said, his voice lifting as he weren’t quite sure what the name of his wife was. AKA Paul tells his mother he hasn't seen in four years that he's married. Really, the only thing she can think about is what she's going to tell her book club.

Percy Jackson and the Scrutiny of his Coworkers by pqrker

Gen | 6.4k | Complete

Percy Jackson/Annabeth Chase, Percy Jackson & Original Characters

Marine Biologist Percy Jackson, Adult Percy Jackson

Jim turned back to the tank and looked at Marcie the seal, who was now staring at the spot his coworker had been standing just moments before with that same strange look of reverence in her eyes. Percy Jackson truly was the oddest person Jim Elpool had ever worked with. or 5 times percy's coworkers were confounded by his fish magic, plus 1 time they try to figure it out.

More Things in Heaven and Earth by Skywalking_through_life

T | 7.1k | Complete

Percy Jackson/Annabeth Chase

Post-Gaea & Second Giant War, Canon Compliant, High School

"Sticking her head further out of the light of her doorway and into the dark hallway, she peered left and right, trying to catch a glimpse of movement in the shadows beyond the dim glow of the emergency lights. Nothing. But as her eyes fell on the bank of lockers outside her classroom where the first thud had come from, they widened in horror. A long smear of blood, thick enough to start to drip down the dented metal, stained two of the lockers." Ms. Lafayette is a teacher, not a detective. But that doesn't mean she's not curious - and concerned - when a trail of blood appears in the hallway outside her classroom in the early hours of the morning...

good doesn't equal Goode by vani_em

Gen | 7.3k | Complete

Percy Jackson, Paul Blofis

off screen Percy Jackson/Annabeth Chase, BAMF Percy Jackson, good dad Paul Blofis

One thing was clear: Percy Jackson was not Goode High School material.

In a Field of Dandelions by mrthology

T | 7.5k | Complete

Percy Jackson/Annabeth Chase

Future Fic, Kid Fic, Domestic Fluff

"You okay there?" she asked once she was closer, smiling in what she hoped was a welcoming manner. The man smiled back, still looking a bit confused. Nicky's breath caught in her chest when he met her eyes. His gaze was a little too vivid, his bone structure a little too perfect. He seemed a little too much more than human. Part of her wanted to run, while another part wanted to follow him to the ends of the earth and beyond. "I think so," he replied, breaking the spell. "Just trying to figure out day one, I suppose. I'm Percy!" ----- Percy and Annabeth's eldest child starts school. Percy inadvertently causes a bit of a stir, and Annabeth isn't jealous, not at all.

[conduct] not unbecoming men who [strive] with gods by Skywalking_through_life

T | 8k+ | On-going as of 8/8/23

Percy Jackson/Annabeth Chase, Sally Jackson/Paul Blofis, Percy Jackson & Paul Blofis

Post Second Giant War, Slice of Life, Identity Reveal

"Some students find it hard to find a poem that they identify with," she said simply, even tone belying the gravity of the look she was giving him. "I…I can imagine that you, perhaps, might be one of them." For a moment, he just stared back at her, heart now thumping almost painfully fast as he tried to decide how to respond to that. She was right of course, but now that the moment he'd been waiting for had definitely arrived, was he really prepared to do this? "Are we talking about poetry?" He finally asked, mouth dry, as though he didn't already know the answer to his own question, "Or are we talking about…something else?" Or, a week in the life of Percy's senior year, featuring: a poetry project, a swim meet, prom, several identity crises, and maybe, just maybe, a long-overdue conversation with a certain sharp-eyed teacher.

some have entertained angels unaware by Skywalking_through_life

T | 21k | Complete

Percy Jackson & Sally Jackson, Percy Jackson & Paul Blofis, Minor or Background Relationships, Percy Jackson/Annabeth Chase

Post Second Giant War, Field Trip, Powerful Percy Jackson

"Slumping at the table next to his now slightly raspy stepfather, Percy decided to make one last appeal. "Paul, you can't seriously think me dying of frostbite or exposure on the way to see the Statue of Liberty for the eighty-millionth time is a good death, right? Like, I could do so much better." Paul shrugged, eyes dancing. "I'm not the expert on death in this family, Perce. But I do imagine it's probably more heroic than dying of boredom in US Government class?"' Percy didn't think there was a god of field trips, but if there was...he was pretty sure that they hated him.

[boogiewrites]

Never Break the Chain Pt. 2

Part 2 of 5

Characters: Javier Peña x OFC

Summary:  Javier and Esme's first time seeing each other in almost twenty years. A photograph leads to an obsessive hunt for the woman he thought was dead. They both find they got where they wanted. But is it what they want now?

Warnings/Tags: Tension. Big reunited kiss. 

Click on my icon then go to my Mobile Masterlist in my bio for my other works and chapters. (Had to do this since Tumblr killed links, sorry.) Please like, comment and reblog if you enjoyed it! It helps out us writers A LOT!

Time passes, as it always has and always will. It stopped for no man, not even Javier. Seeing his first love fade into nothing had left him a different man. Walls came up, barriers were built that his enemies would even be impressed by. She’d done him a favor, snapping him out of the young man’s dream, but he felt he had nothing left but trying to help once she was gone. So he threw himself into his work.

Sure there were other women. He thought he loved some, but would always leave them. He always hurt them and that wasn’t his intention precisely but they would thank him years later. He was what they would refer to in close company as “a dodged bullet”. He’d been called far worse.

He despised his cliche reactions to his trauma sometimes. Drinking, smoking, being a general pain in the ass, renowned and proud asshole was easier. Burying yourself in prostitutes and let them take away the thoughts for a little while was the easiest. He would fantasize he could help them, even save some of them. He surely wasn’t getting his hero complex stroked when it came to his work. He had a soft spot for women, he had learned the hard way the shit deal they’d landed when they were born. He couldn’t do much...but he could try to help. So he did. Loss after loss he kept trying. This was that bit of good Esme had always believed in. He wasn’t sure how much longer he would have it so he made the best of it while he could.

The night before was nothing knew, an old habit at this point for him. He went out and got a woman, he’d pour every bit of good in him into her, convincing himself he still had it. He’d make them feel good, listen to them, things that were in short supply in their lives from men. He could be that good guy exception, if only for a short while. It felt nice to not be looked at with disgust or fear. The slivers of affection kept him going after dark. He’d leave them breathless, moans turning to laughs as they dressed, joking they might not make him pay. But they always took the money. And he offered it with no judgment, pulling his jeans on and halfway through a highball glass as his lean outstretched arm offer up their compensation for making him feel something good and push out the bad thoughts for a short while. He could be making worse decisions.

He rubs his temple, suppressing a groan as he slid his way into the uncomfortable chair at the beaten-up metal table. The chatter of his coworkers all making their way into the room was grating but nothing he couldn’t ignore. Morning debriefing, something he gave a shit about. Well, work was the one thing he gave a shit about right now, hyper-focused on the clock and trying to drown out the obsession off the clock. It was a dynamic that he was still trying to perfect. He downs the hot black coffee in his hand and nods at the secretary just outside the doorway, “Get me another, sugar. No sugar.” he winks and sends her off. She side-eyed him and went on her way, that was just Pena to her, horny but harmless. He cracks his back, a grunt before landing his elbows on the table to focus, the overblown commander coming in with a handful of photos, spreading them on the table as they talked about what they always did, the cartel.

Pena tries to approach everything individually, but there was only so much range these guys had, and not seeing them all as one giant collection of piss ants with assault rifles was something getting harder and harder to do. So as new and old names were said, he watched the board fill out, the line attaching known connections and new ones. There had been a new wave of intel, something Pena and his partner Murphy were used to being the ones doing, but he wouldn’t complain if someone else finally wanted to sack up and their fucking job like they were supposed to.

“So we have our old friends,” a slap of photos to the board. “Then there’s a new round of boys coming in.” he taps the newest addition to the board. “Seems we’re getting inbred with the other families, the jewel smugglers, the miners...seems we’re trying to venture out and expand our already impressive portfolio.” he snorts.

“They can never just be fucking satisfied with their millions.” someone groans and complains.

“It’s a good chance try to take them down too.” Murphy shrugs.

“Eyes on the prize, kiss ass,” Pena says quietly, accepting his coffee without a second glance. “Do we know these women?” he asks with a nod in the direction.

“Typical.” Murphy rolls his eyes.

“No. Our assumption is prostitutes. Nothing new there.” the commander goes on, but he quickly becomes background noise as Pena stands and moves toward the board. He stood, hips jutted forward, eyes scanning, hand over his mouth in thought. Once he saw the new pictures he hadn’t heard another word the men had said. “PENA!” barked his way grabs his attention as he casually shifts his attention.

“Mmmph. Yeah.” he mutters, eyes moving back to the board.

“I was informing you, you’d be doing street intel on these newcomers.”

“Yeah,” he says disinterested, thumbing his lip before placing his hands on his hips. “Do we have these photos in color?”

The question catches the room off guard. “Why?” he’s met with annoyed opposition.

“This woman…” he taps the photo of a woman with a sly smile on the arm of a very powerful man. Dark waves teased and a heart-shaped face buried in a fur coat collar worth more than he made in a year. He clears his throat. “I’ve seen her before…”

“They’re whores Javi, of course, you have.” Murphy leads the room in a wave of amused hums and chuckles.

“No I’m serious,” he says with no inflection, catching his partner’s attention. “Do we have a location on them if there’s no color?”

“Why’s color important?”

He’s quiet for a moment, jaw tense and eyes blinking, baffled at what he was allowing himself to think. “Her eyes… were green.” MUrphy readjusts himself in his seat, watching Pena’s eyes carefully. He could swear they looked sad.

“What information we’ve got is here.” the commander points at the table with its thick manilla envelopes.

Javier nods with no spoken response, staying in place until the room is empty except for a hesitant Murphy who approaches him. “Who is she?” he asks quietly.

He shakes his head in response. “It can’t be her,” there’s a heavy pause, “But it...fuck it looks like her…” his voice trails off and Murphy is left with more questions.

“Well, are you gonna answer me or just write poetry about her Javi?”

“She’s…” he sighs and sucks his teeth. “She’s supposed to be dead.”

“Did you-?”

“No… no… nothing like that.” his voice still quiet. “I knew her… fuck...over a decade ago now.”

“So we can add hunting ghosts to our agenda now too. Great.” Murphy takes it lightly and presses his lips together. He stares at Javi, his eyes dark and focused. He was left with more questions than answers. His money was still on it being a hooker. It’s not as if Pena had even talked about Esme since the investigation when he was young. His partner may have his back in life or death situations, and they may have been close, but no one knew about her. Pena had hoped to keep it that way. He hoped he was wrong. He hoped it wasn’t her. Because if it was… well he didn’t know what he’d do.

---------------------------------------------------

Esme didn’t know it but with every minute that passed, she was being proven right about her belief in her first love, that if he knew she was alive, that he would find her.

Esme had ran, a bug out bag down the river and no trace left behind. She made her way south over the years, learning her craft and making friends in the right places. She’d started with rich men, especially rich white men trying to make a living off exploiting her fellow man in Mexico. It had been almost too easy. They thought nothing of her and wore her as if she were a watch; on their arm and shiny and proof of their wealth. She would gain access, gather intel and then sweep in and take the goods and ghost out.

Esme had been legally declared dead and was now living as Estelle. She had so many names over the years but her current incarnation was Estelle. And she was a star. She’d become what she wanted, she was rich and self-reliant. She needed no one and had her fun as she craved it. There were men and women and drugs and jewels and for so long it had been a pleasant hazy dream. But the novelty of it wore off, she grew bored,  a witness to her hypocrisy, growing soft and lazy with her indulgence. When she emerged from her haze and saw the state of the world around her she knew things had changed. Narcos now ruled the world. The government bowed to them, the poor worshipped them. She saw they were the future, the new leaders. And for her, that meant that’s where she had to be.

She found herself once again sharp and full of adrenaline. Her new role took real savvy and cunning. Otherwise, she’d end up dead for real. She cozied up, working for Narcos to steal for them. It wasn’t hard in skill, but it was in the amount of sexist shit she had to deal with. She’d killed men for laying hands on her, and worse. She’d pulled knives and guns and made frown men piss themselves as she threatened them with words they’d never heard women utter up to that point. Most of the leaders would laugh until they cried after the fact, seeing a woman act in such away. She entertained them. They underestimated her, saw her as some novelty pet that fetched things and entertained them. She could handle that. As long as she got paid.

Following the groups, making her way around it made sense she found herself in Columbia. She knew it was dangerous, but she was addicted to it. It filled the void of sex and drugs for her for the most part, although she did partake among her peers from time to time. She thought it made her admirable, independent, and a shining example of what a woman could be if she had the nerve to do it. She was, to a degree, but she was also wrong. She lacked the softness in her life anyone, not just a woman needed. A void where no love or trust or intimacy was in her life she filled with material things and lists of her accomplishments. if she kept busy and looking ahead she wouldn’t be still king enough to face her demons.

Except she was about to come face to face with her biggest one.

—

As was his way, Javier had become a bit obsessed. He had to know if this woman was Esme. He’d been tracking her and was able to have DEA level observation to do it. It was a personal mission he’d been able to spin to look like a cartel one. There was a connection, she was seen with them, but little was known outside of that. After he’d put the word out for the beautiful woman with green eyes it hadn't taken long before someone scorned by her leaked information on her next job. The informant knew what his boss wanted to be stolen and when she’d be there. Normally no agent or cop would care to pay attention to her, or some jewels being stolen,  she was just some woman to them. But serendipitous timing made sure she became THE woman for one of them.

She practically waltzed into the store. She scaled a fence, a wall and came through a window but for her, that was practically begging her to steal from them. The rooms were dark, silent except for the sounds of her feet as she made her way into the back, unseen and unbothered. It wasn’t until she’d stopped to admire her score before snatching it they the clicking of a gun behind her caught her attention.

He’d waited in the shadows, and none too patiently. With the aim set to intimidate, not kill, he Easter no more time. “Who are you?” It came out as an order.

Her head snapped up, back still to the faceless voice she felt was all too familiar. She blinks, the former goal now removed and replaced with a flood of emotion. She remains silent, her turn to be shocked like he was when he saw her face in the photos.

“Turn around.” Another order. The voice was deeper, darker now but still made her feel the same way.

She turns, and painfully slow. She doesn’t meet his intense gaze immediately, reading his body language first and calming her racing mind. There’s no way it was him.

There’s no way it’s her, his mind reassures him. But as soon as her eyes raise to meet his his stomach drops. He was right.

“Javi?” It was almost a whisper, for the first time in she couldn’t remember when she didn’t hide her emotions in her face.

The gun falls first, his sense falling to the wayside as it slipped into its place in the back waist of his jeans. His frame was broader, still lean moves towards her with an earned confidence now. He doesn’t speak, staring at her as if she might not be real. She gives him his time. He’d earned it. “It really is you.” It was his turn to let the veil fall, dark eyes shining in the low, cool light.

She nods. “Javi I can explain.” She begins, prepared to apologize and ask forgiveness before asking him why the hell he was there at all. They were a long way from home.

“You’re alive.” A rather obvious statement that made her smile. It was all he could handle.

“I can explai-“ a quick burst of words before they’re cut off by his mouth landing against hers. She hadn’t expected this. She was prepared for many things last but not this, at least not for him to be kissing her. “Javi my-“ she tries to get out but his hands are already on her cheeks, hot and damp and certain. She lets her concern fade for a moment, it would all be fine. She gives in to it, lets him take the lead, and pull her against him roughly. The anger and hurt coming through in his grip on her back and face as they kissed breathlessly. He stole her focus without trying, there was the signature huff from his nose, the nuzzle into her between separating to catch his breath but he felt different. But so did she.

Where they once held differences in certainty they now held the opposite. He kissed her like he just found out his first love was alive after decades of vices to cover the loss. Because he had. Every woman and experience he’d had between her and now, every skill and thus gained confidence was clear and apparent. This was not a boy handling a girl. He was a man handling his woman.

And there she was, blindsided and touch starved, passion and intimacy starved being devoured by the only man she’d ever truly loved. The only man she’d ever let in and see her for what she was. The only man that knew Esmeralda. It was a raw and painful ache that emanated from her chest as she clutched her hand around his wrist and the other gripped his shirt in her hand. She gave in because she knew it wouldn’t last long, and after it was over she’d miss it.

With eyes squeezed shut, his forehead pressed to hers, his statuesque nose gently rubbing against hers he exhales hot against her face. “Esme…” he pulls back and holds her face, demanding her focus.

“It’s been so very long since someone’s called me that.” she sighs and puts her hands on his forearms.

“Since I called you that?”

She nods and smiles, face pressed into his hand.

“Maybe it’s about time people called you that again.” he pauses and looks her over with a hard brow, he couldn't hide his simmering anger underneath the confusion, relief, and affection. “Where the fuck have you been?” She sighs in response. “Why the hell are you HERE?”

“Same as you. Work.”

“Why are you with those men? Don’t you know who they are? What they do?”

“Why do you ask questions you already know the answer to?”

“Why Esme?” his eyes water and his hands squeeze her face a bit too tightly before a wave of dizziness hit him.

“Same reason now as then,” she whispers, his grip loosening and not hearing her response, she slicks his dark hair back as his eyes start to roll around in their sockets. “You're fine, Javi. Seems you fell for my defense mechanism.” she smiles and he looks at her, starting to slump. “To be fair I didn’t know to expect you. You’ll wake up soon enough. It’s only temporary.” she wipes the culprit of the sudden wave of forced unconsciousness he was going through, her lipstick off his mouth. He was out quickly, and she spent some long moments exploring the now aged face of her once wide-eyed companion. “You are even more handsome than I thought you’d be.” she coos and kisses him after dragging him into a chair and pushing it into a corner so he wouldn’t fall. “It now inevitable we’ll meet again. My old hound dog.” She chuckles, a kiss to take in the scent of his hair before she parted ways. “See you later, mi amor.”

-----------

Peña awoke to a boot knocking against his knee and an odd headache. It was pitch black outside by now, people on the streets outside none the wiser to the life-altering experience he’d just had.

“Are we blacking out in stores now?” Murphy snarks and shakes his head, leaning against a door frame.

“That’s not...I’m not…” Javier shakes his head, rubbing and tapping at the pulse in his skull.

“Then what the hell is it?” He can hear the judgment in his partner's voice.

“If I told you you would think I was crazy.” he groans and sits up with his back straight in the chair, one cocked brow looking over to the man staring him down.

“And I don’t now?”

Peña huffs out a laugh. That was a fair assessment. He’d think the same thing. He looked across the room, the glass case he’d found her standing in front of now empty. “She took the jewels.” he switches the subject, an arm raised lazily and collapsing against his lap after.

“Were they made of cocaine? Why do we give a shit?”

“It’s not the jewels that are important. It’s the woman that did it.”

“A woman? Huh. That’s something you don’t see every day. That is… a little bit crazy I guess.”

“That’s not what’s crazy.”

“Am I gonna have to fuckin’ waterboard you man, just tell me.” he groans.

“That woman I told you about... that stole those... she's been declared legally dead for almost twenty years.” he finally says with a defensive tone and a face that said don’t fucking try me to the man still assessing his sanity with no attempt at hiding his negative prognosis.

“Oh.” Murphy contemplates looking away to the empty case. “That... yeah okay that is crazy.”

@jaegeeeeer​ @likedovesinthewnd​ @inkededucatednnerdy​  @biharryjames @ladamari68​ @past-romantic​ @weliketomoveit

[toffrox]

Voices (Part Two)

Summary: In the months preceding Lester & Meg's return to camp, Nico's nightmares begin to worsen. Nico goes to Percy for advice. *Spoilers for Tower of Nero*

Part One | Part Two | Part Three

Read on Ao3

Nico

Nico lay staring at the ceiling of Cabin Thirteen.

The voices were absent today, although the memory of last night's dream still burned in his mind.

Alongside them were echoes of his conversation with Will. They had fought yesterday and they hadn't spoken since.

Nico had skipped dinner. And breakfast.

Perhaps if Jason were here he would have brought Nico some food. (He was awfully hungry).

But Jason was gone.

Nico cursed the tears that stung the corner of his eyes as he remembered again the moment he had felt Jason's…

But no, he shouldn't think about it. Couldn't think about it.

It would drive him crazy, he knew, if he obsessed over it. And he wasn't even sure if it was real… especially with all the other weird things Nico had been seeing and hearing lately.

Part of him knew already that this feeling was different. That it was real. Just like he knew Bob's voice calling out to him was real.

But he didn't want to think about that either. Didn't want to think about how upset he was making Will.

"You can't go down there alone again, Nico. You can't." Will had told him, his eyes sparkling with tears.

Nico had panicked at the idea of Will coming with him to Tartarus. But that had only made Will more upset.

"You really don't think I can do this, huh?" 

Nico groaned and rolled onto his side, curling into a ball in the corner of his bed.

All he wanted was to protect Will. For Will to be safe. To keep him and their relationship seperate from all the horrible things that already haunted everything else in his life.

He squeezed his eyes shut in an attempt to stop the tears that still threatened to overtake him.

Instead the darkness just reminded him of his dream.

-

He dreamed he was at camp.

Except his dream self didn't know it was camp. He was lost.

He stumbled around the green, knocking on cabin doors. Each time he did the door would swing open to reveal groups of monsters instead of campers.

The Apollo cabin had been empty.

Someone was calling Nico's name. Someone Nico knew… or had known a long time ago.

Nico ran along the pier at the lake and around the edges of the woods, but he couldn't find his way… he wasn't even sure what he was looking for. Wherever he went, the voice calling out to him became more distant.

He had walked up to the Big House and wandered around the big, empty rooms, but no one was home. He'd climbed up to the attic thinking maybe he'd find something there. Instead he found himself face to face with Akhlys, who wept. She stared at him, like she stared at him every time he dreamed about her.

He knew what she was going to say before she said it, even though it had been months since she had spoken to him in his dreams. After he and Will had started dating she had started appearing in his dreams less frequently. When she did, she rarely spoke. She rarely even cried lately, though she was crying now. Crying and smiling.

"Child of Hades, what more could I do to you?"

Nico wrenched his eyes open again and sat up straight.

He blinked the remnants of tears out of his eyes, his heart still racing from the memory of the dream.

Then he stood up and reached for his shoes and bomber jacket.

He needed to talk to someone about this.

-

Nico appeared on the doorstep and pressed the buzzer before he could change his mind.

It wasn't the first time he'd stood outside Percy Jackson's place, his stomach churning with nervousness. But this time he wasn't nervous about the boy inside the apartment. All Nico could think about was his fight with Will and Will in Tartarus and whether he would be able to fix it.

"Hello?" came a woman's voice from the apartment speaker.

Nico had learned that it was better to shadow travel to the front door when visiting the Jacksons'. Apparently shadow travelling onto the window sill or directly into the living room was a little inappropriate.

"Hey Mrs Jackson. It's Nico."

Nico bounced on his heels impatiently.

"Nico! What a pleasant surprise! Come right up-" Mrs Jackson's voice was cut off by static and the door buzzed open.

When Nico arrived on the Jackson's floor he saw the door at the end of the corridor click open and Percy appeared in the doorway, grinning.

"Hey, man!" He said, stepping back to let Nico inside and closing the door behind him. "What brings you to the city?"

Nico swept his eyes around the apartment. The TV was blaring out from the living room. In the kitchen Nico could hear Estelle babbling away and Mrs Jackson cooing at her.

"I was hoping we could… talk." Nico said, uneasy.

Percy eyed him with concern.

"Of course." He nodded. "Let's go up to my room. I'll ask Mom if you can stay for lunch." As he spoke, he led Nico back into the kitchen.

"Oh, you don't need to- Hi Mrs Jackson." Nico cut himself off to raise his hand in greeting. Mrs Jackson beamed at him and stood up to wrap him in a hug. Behind her Percy bent over baby Estelle in her crib, wiggling his fingers at her.

"How have you been, dear?" Mrs Jackson asked, "Will you be joining us for lunch?"

"I-"

"Yes. We'll cook." Percy said before Nico could answer. "But we have to talk about camp stuff first. We'll be in my room if you need us."

And before Nico could argue Percy was rushing up the stairs to his bedroom, leaving Nico to shoot Mrs Jackson an apologetic glance before following him.

-

"So what's up?"

Percy was sitting cross legged on his bed, looking entirely unconcerned about the mess that was his room.

Nico leaned hesitantly against Percy's desk, brushing away piles of notes and worn textbooks. He started to worry that maybe he'd made a mistake coming here… Percy was in the middle of studying for finals. He didn't have time to talk to Nico about this.

Still, it felt too late to back out now.

"I…" Nico fumbled for words, unsure where to begin. "I've been having nightmares… about Tartarus." He said eventually.

Percy's concerned frown deepened at Nico's words.

"What kind of nightmares?"

"I…" Nico paused and took a slow, deep breath. Then he plowed through and told Percy everything: How he'd been having nightmares and flashbacks and waking dreams. How they had been getting worse, and more specific. How he had been hearing things, hearing voices. How one of those voices was Bob the Titan. And most importantly how Nico was convinced that all of these things meant that Nico would have to go back down to Tartarus again. To find Bob. To stop the voices.

Percy's face grew paler the more Nico spoke, until he looked almost as nauseous as Nico felt.

Again, Nico felt a stab of guilt for coming.

What was he thinking? Will was right when he'd said that Percy and Annabeth had enough to worry about as it was. Nico stared at his shoes in shame.

When Percy eventually spoke, his voice was hoarse.

"I'm so sorry, Nico."

Nico guessed that Percy was feeling guilty for having left Bob behind but that just made Nico's stomach flood with remorse all over again. Because that wasn't the real reason Nico had come to talk to Percy about all of this.

"Will wants to come with me." Nico forced himself to say it, though just the thought made his head spin with fear.

Percy was quiet but Nico could somehow tell he was looking at him.

"That's… good, right?" he said.

"No, it's not good!" Nico couldn't help but yell.

It was like all the emotion he'd been holding back this morning came rushing into him at once. He brought his hands up to cover his face and bent over, helpless. Paralysed at the idea of Will, his Will, being trapped down in Tartarus with him, so far away from the sunshine Nico always associated with him, so tangled up in everything Nico hated about his past.

"I can't- He can't-" Nico stammered out the words in a kind of panic, the memory of Will's face flushed with anger from their fight yesterday swimming before his eyes. "And now he's mad at me and I- I can't just… I can't do that do him. I can't let him come."

Nico dropped his hands in defeat and looked up at Percy once more.

Percy's eyes were big with concern and pity.

"I get it." he said softly. "It's ok to be scared."

Perhaps those words would have annoyed Nico once. But the truth was Nico knew Tartarus scared Percy just as badly as it scared him. He met Percy's eyes with determination.

"If I have to go back, I'll go back." said Nico. "But I can't let Will come with me. There's just no way. If something happened to him…" Nico closed his eyes.

"I get it." Percy said again.

"What do I do?" Nico croaked. Percy winced and shook his head.

"I don't know, man… Maybe if-"

"You could come with me instead." Nico blurted it out. He was desperate, pleading. He felt terrible even as he said it but he was willing to do anything, ask anything to avoid the thought of Will in danger.

Panic flashed in Percy's face. He swallowed, looking nauseous again.

"Nico, I can't go down there again." He shook his head, eyes wide and fearful. "I can't. Not even for Bob. I don't think I could…"

"Percy, please…" Nico begged. "It's Will. Can you honestly imagine Will Solace down there?"

Percy's guilty look changed then into something resembling annoyance. He almost rolled his eyes.

"Nico. Will is a badass. He's been through two wars." said Percy flatly.

"Yes, so he keeps saying." Nico huffed.

"Then why aren't you listening?"

"I am, Percy, but it's not the same you know that."

Nico was desperate again. Percy met his eyes and seemed to regain some kind of confidence in his sternness.

"Nico. Do you think Annabeth would listen for one second if I tried to tell her she wasn't powerful enough to do something?" he said.

"That's not what I'm saying." Nico sighed. "I know Will is powerful. I do. Obviously I think he's amazing."

"Then you have to trust that he'll be able to take care of himself." said Percy.

"How can he when he's always trying to take care of me first?"

"Well maybe you should let him."

Nico threw up his hands and tugged his hair, exasperated.

"I can't just ignore this, Percy!"

"No. Listen to me." Percy's tone turned serious. "I wouldn't have lasted 5 minutes down there without Annabeth. The only reason we've survived anything together these past few years is because we trust that we have each other's backs - no matter what."

"But -"

"Dude… if Will got given a dangerous quest and tried to do it without help, would you let him?" Percy raised his eyebrows at Nico. Nico scowled, angry at being interrupted and frustrated at the truth behind Percy's words.

"I… yeah, of course I would." Nico said, weakly. But he knew that wasn't true. "If that's what he said he wanted… I…" He trailed off, unable to convince himself.

Nico sighed again.

"Ok fine." he snapped. "But this is Tartarus, Percy. It's not the same. You know it's not."

Percy grimaced. "If… if you really do have to go back down there - and I'm still not convinced that this is actually a good idea - then don't you think Will is going to find a way to follow you whether you like it or not?"

Nico shook his head stubbornly.

"If I told Will I didn't want him there, he would listen. He wouldn't follow me." Again, he wasn't sure that that was true. But Will had always supported him before.

"Even if that were true," said Percy, "Do you think he'd be happier stuck back at camp waiting for you?"

Nico chewed his lip.

"Will is not going to be ok if you go down there without him." Percy went on. "He's already worried about you. You have to take care of him too, you know. You barely survived down there last time; things got so bad that being kidnapped by giants ended up being a good thing! You think Will is going to be just going about the infirmary without you not even worrying about it? You might not come back! Don't you realise you won't be able to do this on your own?"

"Of course I know that" Nico was miserable. "Thats why…" Nico's voice went quiet. "That's why I thought maybe if I asked you…"

Percy looked though Nico had just punched him in the stomach. Nico broke his gaze, ashamed.

Percy took a deep, shuddering breath. "Look, maybe I should tell you why exactly I can't go back there."

Nico glanced up to see Percy inspecting his fingernails, conflicted. Nico stared him down, waiting.

"When…" Percy's voice caught and he cleared his throat before pulling himself upright and pushing on. "When Annabeth and I were in Tartarus, we met Akhlys, the goddess of misery."

Nico's blood went cold, remembering his dream from last night.

"We… we fought her." Percy said. "But we were losing. And she… there was this poison. All around me. I realised, since it was made of water, kind of, I could control it."

Percy's eyes glazed over. He looked more frightened than Nico had ever seen him.

"I- I fought back and I almost… I almost killed her. I wanted to. I could feel that she was choking on her tears and the poison…"

Nico stared, wide-eyed.

He knew Percy was powerful; more powerful than anyone. But to kill a goddess…

"I scared Annabeth." Percy admitted, voice hushed. "If she hadn't stopped me…"

"Percy-" Nico began, although he wasn't sure what he intended to say. What could he say, after that? But Percy looked up and gave him a grim smile.

"Jason told me that stopping friends from using their powers in the wrong way is something friends have to do for each other." he said.

Oh Gods. Nico felt his stomach lurch as he realised. I haven't said anything about Jason.

He felt another brief wave of panic and guilt at not thinking of it earlier, but at the same time he couldn't bring himself to say anything when he didn't know for sure if what he'd felt was true.

What if this was like with Leo, and Nico was wrong? He couldn't do that Percy. And especially not now, after everything else Nico had just dumped on him.

"Anyway the reason I'm telling you all this." Percy said. "Is because I've been thinking about that fight a lot and- well, it's just that I don't think I could trust myself to go back to Tartarus and not… I don't think I could stop myself from becoming…"

"I get it." Nico said, echoing Percy's words from before.

And Nico did get it.

Honestly, Nico felt shocked. How many times had he replayed his own encounters with his darkest instincts; his fights and moments of weakness when he doubted whether or not he'd done the right thing or whether he'd gone too far.

He had always thought that as a Son of Hades he was the only demigod who felt conflicted about his own powers in this way. Who felt dangerous. Who questioned whether their powers were good or bad. Who looked at other demigods and saw fear reflected back at him in their eyes.

Nico felt all of a sudden that maybe he wasn't so alone after all.

He shifted on his feet and heard something crinkle under his toes.

He looked down to see a picture of Percy and Annabeth. They were sitting on the beach at Camp Half Blood. Percy had one arm thrown around Annabeth's neck and she was leaning into him, eyes alight with laughter. Percy was looking at her, his face turned to the side, away from the camera. His smile was bright and clear-sighted. A million miles away from the way Percy's face was twisted in confusion and worry right now.

Nico thought of Will, and the way Will smiled at him.

Nico never felt dangerous around Will. Will was never scared of him. Had never been scared of him. Even when Nico felt he was at his worst.

Suddenly Nico realised what Percy was trying to tell him. He understood.

"You're right, Percy."

Percy's head jerked towards him in surprise. He gave Nico a lopsided smile.

Nico pushed away from the desk and stood up properly.

He would have to talk to Will when he got back to camp. Would have to talk to him about what came next and apologise for making him so upset.

But for now, he had to rest and get some food in him.

He returned Percy's smile, determined to make up for having shown up with such bad news and asking him to relive Tartarus again. Percy grinned then. He stood up and made to head back down to the kitchen, motioning for Nico to join.

"Come on," he said. "I think we deserve some lunch."

[labyrinth-runner]

Feelings I Can’t Fight

Christian x OC

Moulin Rouge Fanfic

Part of The Greatest Thing

Read the rest Here

New Years had come and gone and rehearsal for Spectacular, Spectacular had started up again. Every day since Estelle left, Christian lost more and more hope of her returning. He finished the play with the Duke's requested ending, having the Maharajah keep the courtesan while the penniless sitar player ended up alone. Life imitates art, he thought. Taking a page out of Toulouse's handbook, Christian turned heavily to drinking. Otherwise, his thoughts would wander to a dark place he never wanted to go, but would always end up in eventually. Flashes of thoughts in his mind about Estelle and her new suitor. His eyes upon her face. His hand upon her hand. His lips caressing her skin. It was more than he could stand. Thus, he drank to dull the pain. This fact did not go unnoticed. His friends debated on whether or not they should encourage him to go back home. His haven that was Paris had turned into his own hell, and although tortured artists were in fashion, they did not want Christian to become one. Part of his appeal was his hopeful nature and his love of love, but now that spark was gone and the only person who could ever get it back was across the way in England preparing for her wedding day in a few weeks.

Estelle was trying her best. Truly, she was. However, there was a disconnect between her and Mr. Danvers that she knew they would never get passed. It wasn't his fault at all. It was hers. She couldn't open herself up fully to him, because part of her still held out hope and love for Christian. Although, she figured that every woman held out hope like this at one point in their lives. That, when they had no way of getting themselves out of a situation, some white knight would swoop them up and abscond with them to a paradise where they would never know loneliness again. The worst part of it all, was that her father had been right. Mr. Danvers was a good catch. He was kind to her, he would talk to her about any subject, and he never made her to feel like she was less than. Yet, she still didn't love him, and she had a sinking suspicion that perhaps he felt the same. She'd noticed little things here and there, a furtive glance between him and one of his servants, the way girl's hand lingered a little too long on his when she gave something to him, and the slight tinge of pink on his cheeks when it did. If she didn't know better, she would suspect that he was in love with his maid. Estelle and Mr. Danvers danced around the fact that they both had feelings for another, both seeing their upcoming nuptials as that of an obligation to their family. Hers to her family and helping their financial situation, and his to his family and to keep them from scandal. There was an unspoken agreement between the two of them, and a friendship started to prevail, but that was all it was. Neither truly planned on ever committing themselves whole-heartedly to this. In Estelle's case, she knew that her great love was behind her in France, and she would never be so lucky as to get another. Her mother had told her as a child that everyone had a great love out in the world, but some were never lucky enough to find it, but when they did, they should never let them go. Her story always culminated in a soft glance towards Estelle's father. The fact that the same man was the one who convinced her to give up on her great love was not lost on her. In a way, she thought that perhaps he was trying to protect her. After all, she had seen what the effect losing her mother had upon him. Perhaps her father was trying to spare her that same loss later in life by making sure it never got that far. She didn't have any children to look at every day, reminding her of what she had lost. In fact, all she had of Christian that was tangible was his scarf that he had lent to her the day she never returned. It still smelled like his aftershave. Sometimes, when she truly missed him, she'd wrap herself up in his scarf and take a deep breath. The day the scarf ceased to smell like him would be a sad day indeed. It would be the day when she could no longer pretend she was wrapped in him. She dreaded the day that dreaming would end.

As she stood in front of the mirror for her dress fitting, she wanted to wrap herself up in that scarf. Her mind wandered to daydreams of walking down the aisle in this dress towards Christian. A frown settled on her face as the Christian in her daydream morphed into Mr. Danvers. Her sister watched her intently from a stool nearby.

"Most women cry tears of joy at this part of the preparations," Mary commented. "After all, its one of the few times you get to dress like a queen and no one will complain."

Estelle waited until the seamstress had left before letting out a sigh. "It's hard to be full of joy over an event that closes the door on your happiness."

Mary digested her sister's comment for a moment before gathering up the courage to ask her what she had been meaning to find out for weeks. "What did father say to you to make you come back?" she asked softly. She figured it had to be something truly impactful for her sister to leave a man that so clearly loved her. When Mary had gotten back to that hotel, she wasn't quite sure what she had seen at first. It was only after she got home and thought more about it that she had realized that what she had witnessed was one soul breaking in half, knowing it would never be put back together again.

"Nothing for you to worry about," Estelle replied with a sad smile.

"If it was about me, please, Estelle, don't do this. Your happiness is just as important as mine," Mary pleaded. She couldn't live with herself if she had caused this pain.

Estelle stepped off the stand and sat next to Mary, taking her hands in hers. "Mary, your future is important to me. Father just reminded me that you would need a sister to guide you in the future, and staying in Paris was not conducive to that."

Mary sighed in frustration, "You're lying. I can feel it, but I don't know why."

"Believe what you will," Estelle sighed, getting back up once the seamstress returned with pins.

The rest of her fitting was silent. Then, she went to call on Mr. Danvers to make a few more arrangements for their engagement party at the end of the week.

"It will be a lovely evening," Estelle murmured after they had finished deciding the details.

"I'm sure every paper will be discussing it," Mr. Danvers replied as they started their walk around the garden.

They shared a look, the silent acknowledgement that they wished it wouldn't be as big of a spectacle as their families were making it out to be. When they were out of earshot of anyone else, Estelle decided to step into unchartered territory.

"How did they get you to agree to this?" she asked softly.

Mr. Danvers sighed, looking down at her hand on his arm. "It was either agree to their meddling or be cut off. I couldn't give her the life she deserves if I had nothing. At least, this way, I can still help her out financially should she need it."

Estelle nodded. "Should you wish to... pursue... things further, know that I would never hold it against you."

He looked down at her as if she had sprouted a new head. "Ms. Devereux, my feelings aside, I would never do anything that would bring scandal upon you."

She gave him a sad smile, "Mr. Danvers, as your wife, it is my duty to give you a happy life. Should that make you happy, I would not deny you it."

He shook his head, "Why did you agree to this? Clearly you want this as much as I do. I saw you with that Thompson fellow earlier in the season. We all thought that would be the talk of the papers."

Estelle looked up at him, "This stays between us?"

"Of course."

"My mother's sickness ruined my father financially. If I didn't find a good match, their standing would fall and my sister may never get her own season," she admitted.

"You have a good heart, Estelle," Mr. Danvers sighed. "Even if it will never truly be mine."

She gently patted his hand, "Ours would not be the first marriage of convenience."

"I wish it didn't have to be like this," he replied.

"I echo your sentiments," she murmured.

"Have you heard from him since?"

"No. However, I'm not surprised. If I remember correctly, the opening night for his play is this weekend. He's probably too busy to write to the woman who broke his heart on Christmas," she said with a sardonic smile as they returned to his house. Mr. Danvers sent her home in a carriage.

In the quiet snowfall, she thought back to the last time she'd seen snow like this. Paris. Christmas. Christian. She'd give anything for this not to be how it all ended. She had had him in her arms, and now all she had was him in her heart. It wasn't the same. It would never be the same. She pulled her knees to her chest as she watched the covered streets of London pass by the window. He was probably in the arms of a prostitute by now. Or maybe he was working on the finishing touches of his play. Perhaps, even, he was drinking with Toulouse. The only thing that all those activities had in common was that he wasn't with her. In moments like this, she wondered if she had made the right decision. Should she have ever looked for him? Although she had been miserable before, at least she hadn't made things worse for him. She knew she had hurt him by leaving, just as he had hurt her by leaving. However, two wrongs didn't make a right. They weren't even. They were both just more broken than they were before.

Opening night was soon upon Christian. Although he was not completely satisfied with the production, it was out of his hands now, just as his current life situation was. He leaned against the wall, watching as everyone moved around him in a blur, setting up for their first performance of Spectacular, Spectacular.

"You did a good job, but I have to say, I'm not a fan of the ending," Satine commented, coming to stand next to him.

He barely gave her a glance, "We promised him artistic input. This was what he wanted."

"But is it what you wanted?" she asked.

"It's a more realistic ending," he sighed, swiping his face.

"Is it?" she questioned, turning his face to hers. "Christian, you put your heart and your soul into the rest of this production, but this ending isn't you."

"And how is it not 'me', Satine? It's what happened. She left me for a richer man who could take care of her. How is the courtesan ending up with the Maharajah not 'me'?" he asked, on the verge of frustrated tears.

"Because you never give up on love," she commented. "Even when it seemed impossible that you would ever see her again, you still loved her."

"I got a second chance, Satine. I can't get another."

"Can't or won't?" she challenged. "Because, I think you can, but you won't if you stay here."

"I can't go back to London with nothing to offer her," he said sadly.

"You don't have nothing. You'll have love. Since when is that not enough?" Satine asked gently.

He looked up at her, swiping the stray tear that had slipped down his cheek.

"I know you ran away from London to come here, but I don't think this is home for you anymore. In fact, I don't think it ever was. I think it was one of those pipe dreams that you have, only to realize that it's not what you truly want," she murmured, sadly cupping his cheek. "You have the choice to get out and rewrite the ending before its too late. Not all of us get that chance."

"But, London is-"

"Is she worth it?" Satine interrupted.

"Of course she's worth it. She's worth everything to me!"

"Then, go get her!" Satine said, pushing him out the stage door.

Behind him, Christian heard the opening notes of his show begin to play in the theatre. He shook his head, looking up at the sky. Satine was right. He saw the smallest star and smiled. Come what may, he was going home.

[ravenbrenna09]

Safe - Chapter Three

AO3

...

HAHA, I finished it. FINALLY.

I'm sorry that it's taken me so long to complete, but with presentations and tests, my schoolwork has pretty much been kicking my ass and forcing me to be unable to write or push it back (as you guys on my Tumblr know). Add that with my fucked up sleep schedule and it's only worse! But, it's okay because this chapter is finished so I hope you all enjoy this chapter!

Good, maybe bad news how you see it, this story will only have four chapters! After Safe is finished, I’m going to taking a week-long break to work on other stories (specifically my Potter Siblings one, Harry and Ron have been fighting the troll for weeks) and do some more live blogging more episodes before I start on my WTFock @ Hogwarts AU. So, now that is out of the way, I hope you enjoy! 

...

His body was tired.

His mind was tired.

His hands were tired.

Sander was exhausted.

His heart was screaming at him, two conflicting thoughts resounding through his body like the beat of a drum, not the good kind, but the loud and obnoxious kind. One of his thoughts was urging him to go to sleep. His entire body screamed in exhaustion, in being tired, having worked all night, trying to drown his sadness into the worn paper of his sketchbook, sketching the same face over and over again until his hand physically hurt. 

But, the second thought, the one that had been present, lingering in the background, was now a renewed melody in the front of his mind, now that Sander had slammed into him in the lobby of his apartment complex. Robbe. Robbe and his doe-eyes and his single earring and his dimples. Part of Sander wanted to go out and find Robbe and explain, but he knew that Robbe was crushed, that Sander had been the one to do that, and…

Sander locked the door behind him, tears slipping from the corners of his eyes. He tossed the bag with his cold groceries in the fridge and he placed the bag that needed to be sorted into cabinets on the kitchen counter and, somehow, he made it to the couch, collapsing down on the cushions, his body shutting down and forcing him into a restless sleep. 

Even as his body forced him into sleep, his mind kept waking him up, pulling him in and out of sleep. 

He remembered waking up to send Robbe a message, to see if he was okay, and he barely managed to hit send on the third and final message before he was slipping into his dreams again, dreaming of Robbe and his doe-eyes and his burgundy beanie and his infinite universes. He woke up to the sound of the front door opening, the image of Robbe slipping from his fingers, the voices of Amber and a man whispering to one another, but it wasn’t Estelle or a woman with brown hair so he turned around, going back to sleep. He woke up to pillows being put under his head, someone moving him so he could spread out, covering him with a blanket, pressing a kiss to his forehead, and he mumbled out something before he was gone again, blinking in and out of sleep like it was the most natural thing in the world. 

When he woke up, for real this time, the loss of the Robbe in his dreams evident when he awoke, clutching his own leather jacket like a lifeline, the blanket on his shoulders weighed down on him and the soft light of the morning (or the evening?) was filtering through the crack in the curtains and Val was curled up in the armchair, his head resting against the back of the chair, his ash-blond hair spilling over his shoulders and sleeping peacefully. 

Sander sat up, panic filling his system. He shoved off the blanket and dropped his leather jacket on the bed and moved through the house. He searched the bedroom and the bathroom and the closets, searching but never finding her, Estelle. Val found him, peering into the closet in his spare-bedroom-turned-art-studio and letting him know he was there, letting out a yawn. “Sorry man, I didn’t realize that you had woken up. I must’ve fallen asleep myself.” 

Sander swallowed. “How long was I out?”

Val checked his watch. “A day. I was coming to bring you your jacket and I realized I didn’t know where you lived so Amber let me in. When we saw that you were passed out, I knew that something was wrong. You don’t seem like yourself and I was worried about you.”

“You should’ve woken me up,” Sander mumbled. 

“No, I shouldn’t have. You didn’t look good at the party, Sander. Hell, you left without your jacket and without saying goodbye! Who knows how cold it was driving back here on your motorcycle without at least some form of protection from the cold?” Val spoke, crossing his arms over his chest. He was raising his voice, like he always did when he was passionate and concerned, and Sander didn’t know what to do, running a hand through his hair, his anxiety running high. “Look, I know that there’s something going on with you and you know that I’m always able to know. But, you cannot carry the world on your shoulders, okay? You’ll just end up hurting yourself and the people around you.”

“I know,” Sander whispered, thinking of how many times he had parroted the same words to Camille, his baby sister, who used to walk around with the same thoughts in her head. 

“You know that you can talk to me, right?” 

Sander nodded his head. 

“So, what’s going on?”

Sander swallowed, looking over at his friend standing in his art room, his old childhood friend that had seen every single ugly side of Sander and had stayed with him, that was willing to accept him back into his life with open arms even after Sander had stepped away, following Britt’s wishes. And, Sander found that he couldn’t keep this from him, that he didn’t want to. “You have to promise not to tell Amber, okay?” Sander whispered and Val nodded his head. “I haven’t gotten a chance to tell my mom and that’s a face-to-face conversation that you need to have, you know?” 

Val nodded again. “I understand, Sander.”

“There’s a girl… that’s been stalking me…”  

And, so, Sander told him. He told Val about the messages that Estelle had sent, about the ones that were simply asking about his day and about the others which involved pictures or words that were inappropriate to send to someone you didn’t know. He told Val about how he and Camille had been headed to see a movie, to hang out before she went on her vacation, and returned because Sander forgot something, only to find the girl stalking him in her living room. How he managed to get a restraining order. How he saw her knocking on doors the other day.

“Have you told anyone?” Val spoke up. They had moved into the kitchen. Sometime in the past twenty-four hours, Val had been in here, taking some things out of boxes and organizing them around. Val knew how particular Sander was, so he vaguely where Sander liked things. He had set up the coffee ingredients, the ones that Sander had just been fishing out of the box to put them back, next to the coffee maker. When Sander didn’t answer, Val continued, “About her knocking on doors?” 

“I told my landlord, but I haven’t told the police yet,” Sander admitted. 

“Why not?”

“They can’t arrest her for anything,” Sander replied. “All she did was knock on some doors. And, besides, if I went to them and they go question her, she would know for sure that I live in this apartment complex and all she’ll end up doing is coming back.”

Val nodded his head, understanding. “Yeah… I guess you’re right.” He glanced over at Sander. “Is that why you ran from the party? Because you thought she was there?”

“No,” Sander replied. “I left for a different reason.” His friend’s eyes got narrow, staring at him with a confused glare, silently telling him to spill it. “Okay, okay… before I realized that she had found out that I lived in this apartment complex, I was seeing somebody.” 

The mere thought of Robbe was enough to make Sander smile. But, the image was quickly drowned, taken over by the words that he had sent to him, his mind’s own conjured image of a broken Robbe, sad and defeated all because of him. His smile disappeared and Sander bit down on his lip, the pain briefly batting away the words that flooded in his mind.

You’re toxic.

“Who were you seeing?”

Sander swallowed. “His name is Robbe. And, he came over to the apartment a few times…”

Val nodded his head. “Well, you seemed really happy for a second there,” Val noted, looking grim. “Did you guys have a bad breakup? If I had known, I wouldn’t have been all over Soph. I’m sorry.”

“No,” Sander interrupted, shaking his head. “No, it’s not that. I promise.” There was a look of relief that crossed over Val’s face before it was replaced with one of concern. But, he didn’t have to ask this time for Sander to continue, “After I realized that she had found me, I had cut it off. I really like him, but I couldn’t stand the thought of him getting hurt because of me.” Val opened his mouth to respond, but Sander didn’t let him talk, adding, “But, he doesn’t want anything to do with me now. He saw me kissing that girl, Laura, and he ran out of the club.” 

“How do you know he saw you?” Val questioned. 

Sander sent him a look.

“What? It’s a valid question!” 

It was, but Sander didn’t want to admit it. “Why else would he go running from the club and leave all of his friends behind with no idea where he went?” Val seemed to nod his head, leaning against the counter. “And, besides, it’s all my fault that he got hurt.”

“Hey, you had no idea that he would’ve been in that club,” Val interrupted. 

“I should’ve.”

“Sander,” Val spoke, crossing his arms over his chest. “Stop putting so the blame on yourself! It is not your fault.”

“But, it is my fault.”

“How so?”

“I got too comfortable,” Sander admitted, feeling the tears prick his eyes. 

He was unable to look up at Val, certain that there was an exasperated look in his eyes. “Sander, there is absolutely nothing wrong with you being comfortable.” He took a step forward, closer to Sander, but he still refused to meet his eyes. “There’s nothing wrong with that. 

“I got too comfortable, Val,” Sander started. He felt Val move to interrupt, but he shook his head, silently telling him not to. “No, it’s true. I got too comfortable and I wasn’t thinking. I thought that I had lost her because of the restraining order and moving away. But, I didn’t. She showed up, here, knocking on doors, and I almost put someone in danger because I got too comfortable.” 

Val let out a sigh. “Sander, look at me.” Sander raised his eyes to meet Val’s blue ones. “It’s not your fault that this girl has attached herself to you. But, you don’t need to punish yourself for something that you can’t control.” Sander wanted to believe him, but he couldn’t. “Does Robbe make you happy?”

Sander blinked. “Huh?”

“Does Robbe make you happy?” Val repeated. Sander didn’t reply right away, his mind conjuring images of Robbe in his bed, his arms and legs wrapped around Sander like a koala, and the warm fuzzy feeling, so foreign and new filling up his entire body. And, Val spoke up, only partially obliterating the image, “You might as well go ahead and say yes because I already know the answer.”

“Yes,” Sander replied, laughing lightly. 

“See? Was that so hard?” Val replied. 

“No,” Sander replied. “But, that doesn’t change anything.” Val raised an eyebrow. “Robbe, he still ran out of the club.” He glanced at his phone, which Val had brought it. There were notifications from Amber and Sophie and his mom (and Britt, he rolled his eyes), but Robbe’s name wasn’t on the screen. “He still hasn’t responded to my texts.” 

“But, he’s worth fighting for, right?” Val spoke up. “Sander, it’s been a long time since I’ve seen you look like this… Actually, I don’t think I have. Whoever he is, he makes you happy and you deserve it.” He reached out, patting Sander’s shoulder. “You want him. You owe it to yourself to try and make this right.” 

Sander nodded his head. “I missed you, Val.” 

“I missed you too,” Val replied. “Oh, by the way, I posted on your Instagram while you were asleep because I saw that some people were commenting where you were on old photos. It was just a photo of boxes with the caption ‘unpacking’. You can check it if you want to.” Sander pulled up his Instagram account, finding the photo in question. “I’m glad I decided not to go with a window setting, but I didn’t want to post something like that without your permission.”

“Thank you,” Sander replied. “Wait, you follow me?”

Val rolled his eyes. “Of course, I do.” 

[woodshorenews]

upon waking up on valentine’s day morning, many residents will be excited to find a glass vase ( or perhaps, even, more than one ) left outside the door to their room containing freshly cut, fully bloomed red roses. miraculously, it seems like not a single one has a thorn on its stem.  some of these flowers come attached with a note and name, while other senders have chosen for the thrill of remaining anonymous. the arrangement would look beautiful on your kitchen counter, don’t you agree?

did you get one? keep reading to find out...

ANONYMOUS RECIPIENTS.

Aiya Ren – 1 ' ;) '

Aiya Ren – 1

Aiya Ren – 1

Aiya Ren – 1

Alek’ha Arand – 1

Alek’ha Arand – 1

Anakin Skywalker – 1

Anakin Skywalker – 1

Anakin Skywalker – 1 – for making me remember

Anastasia Romanov – 1

Andromeda Tonks – 1

Anduin Wrynn – 6

Anna Minkova – 3

April Kepner – 12

Arya Stark – 1

Bellamy Blake – 7 – 'for all the times i've wanted to punch you in the face'

Bellatrix Black – 1

Ben Solo – 1

Ben Solo – 1

Ben Solo – 3

Brienne of Tarth – 1

Brienne of Tarth – 1

Buzz Lightyear – 12

Caleb Widogast – 1 – i hope you remember soon. i miss you.

Clark Kent – you know i’m terrible at words, but thank you. i remember what matters because of you. – 12

Daenerys Targaryen – 12

Daenerys Targaryen – 3

Daphne Greengrass – 1

Dean Winchester – B====D – 1

Derek Morgan – 6 – from your pretty boy

Evelyn O’Connell – 3

Faith Lehane – 1

Four (Tobias Eaton) – 1 – You're something I never expected and it both frightens me and excites me.

Georgie Weaver – 1

Irene Adler – 1

Han Solo – 1

Harry Hook – 1 – don't get cocky

Harry Hook – 1

Hayley Marshall – 1

Hayley Marshall – 6 – happy valentines day. hope we can talk again soon.

Henry Mills – 1 – "Surprised?"

Hermione Granger – 1

Hope Mikaelson – 1

Jessica Moore – 1

Jester Lavorre – 1

James T Kirk – i’ll let you guess who this is from. – 1

Jon Snow – 1

Jon Snow – 12

Jyscar Ren – 1

Klaus Mikaelson – 1

Laszlo Kreizler – 1

Laszlo Kreizler – 1 – thank you for being as you are.

Leia Organa-Solo – 12 – 🐾

Leia Organa-Solo – 6

Lucifer Morningstar – 1 – cool name.

Lucifer Morningstar – 12 – ;-P

Lucifer Morningstar – 1 – you don’t need more than one rose to know how much i care about you.

Luke Skywalker – 1 – for keeping my memory alive

Lyanna Stark – 1

Lyanna Stark – 1

Maleficent - 1

Marinette Dupain-Cheng – 1 – Daredevil

Matthew Murdock – 3

Mandalorian – 1

Merlin – 1

Mike Warren - 1

Miles Morales – 1

Narcissa Malfoy – 1

Nick Scratch – 1

Nyota Uhura – 1

Olivia Parker – 1

Phyrra Amakiir – 1

Regulus Black – 1

Regulus Black – 1

Remus Lupin – 1

Remus Lupin – 12

Rey – 1 – for a fellow scavenger.

Rhaella Targaryen – 6

Sam Winchester – 3

Sansa Stark – 1

Sharon Carter – 1

Sirius Black – 1

Sirius Black – 12

Snow White – 12 – ;)

Steve Harrington – 1

Thor Odinson – 1

Thor Odinson – 6

Tony Stark – 1

Will Solace –1

Woody – 6

Wynnona Earp – 6 – 'beautiful but deadly sums you up'

Wynonna Earp – 1

Wynonna Earp – 1 – cool name

Zaeda Z'shysa – 12

Zaeda Z’shysa – 1

KNOWN ADMIRERS.

Aang – 1 – Suki

Ahsoka Tano – 1 – Obi-wan Kenobi

Ahsoka Tano – 1 – Stephen Strange

Ahsoka Tano – 1 – You’re a sight for sore eyes! – Padmé Naberrie

Aiya Ren – 12 – i love your perfume, what is that? the stench of death? – Harley Quinn

Alice Kingsleigh – 12 – Through all the craziness and mayhem, you've always been there. I could never thank you enough. – Harry Osborn

Anakin Skywalker – 1 – Wynonna Earp

Anastasia Romanov – 1 – Clarke Griffin

Andromeda Tonks – 12 – "For the woman of my dreams" – Ted Tonks

Anduin Wrynn – 1 – Dana Scully

Andy Trudeau – 1 – don’t tell the others, but you’re my favorite. Thank you for the lovely chat, inspector. – Astoria Malfoy

Andy Trudeau – 4 – Thank you for always having my back. It's never taken lightly. Love Prue – Prue Halliwell

Anna Arendelle – 12 – happy Valentine’s Day, best friend! – Jasmine Badroulbadour

Anna Arendelle – 12 – For my sister and my best friend. I’m sorry for everything. I love you. – Elsa Arendelle

Anna Minkova – 5 – It doesn’t make up for the years I was gone. I’m sorry. – Wanda Maximoff

Annabeth Chase – 12 – love you, blondie. Thanks for putting up with me. – Piper McLean

Annabeth Chase – 1 – happy Valentine’s Day, little sister – Haven Barthelemy

Annabeth Chase – 12 – happy Valentine’s Day to the best big sister I could ever ask for. – Estelle Jackson-Blofis

Annabeth Chase – 12 – I love you, wise girl! We can finally celebrate Valentine's day without any monsters interrupting us for once. – Percy Jackson

Anne Shirley – 3 – you are a princess in every sense. – Ella

Annie Marks – 12 – have you considered ponytails? we could start a club! – Harley Quinn

April Kepner – 3 – Happy Valentine's Day, April! – Nancy Wheeler

April Kepner – 1 – Dana Scully

April Kepner – 2 – One for you and one for Harriet! – Rose Granger-Weasley

Arya Stark – 6 – Jon Snow

Arya Stark – 1 – Tony Stark

Astoria Greengrass – 1 – Welcome to the family! – love, Melinda Halliwell

Astoria Greengrass – 5 – I figured your boyfriend has you covered with flowers, but as your brother I wanted to get you some more.– Lukas Zapolya

Ava Diaz – 12 – Thank you for being the best mom to our twins, and the best wife and friend to me. I love you, mi amor. – Lorenzo Diaz

BB-8 – 1 – Rey

BB-8 – 12 – I love your face, friend! – D-O

BB-8 – 3 – Jyn

Beauregard Lionett – 12 – for my favorite expositor of the colbalt soul. – Jester

Bellamy Blake – 3 – Clarke Griffin

Bellamy Balke – 1 – Emori

Bellamy Blake - 1 - Happy Valentine's Day! - Hermione Granger

Ben Hanscom – 6 – Here’s to remembering this time around. For better or for worse. – Mike Hanlon

Ben Solo – 1 – i hope you have a good valentine's day! – Leia Organa

Beverly Marsh – 6 – If only you knew how good it was to see your face again. – Mike Hanlon

Bruce Wayne – 6 – To your memories. I’m sorry for the bad ones. – Clark Kent

Bruce Wane – 12 – kisses!!!! xoxoxo – Harley Quinn

Brydda llewellyn – 1 – from your secret admirer... happy Valentine’s Day, baby. – Kasey Monroe Sawyer

Bucky Barnes – 5 – I hope you’re having a good day! – Hermione Granger

Bucky Barnes –  3 –  Before you say anything, I tried. – Steve Rogers

Buttercup – 12 – "I love you" – Westley

Caleb Widogast – 12 – for my favorite stinky wizard, even though you’re not stinky anymore – Jester

Cassian Andor – 3 – Leia Organa

Cassian Andor – 9 – thank you for being my guiding force – Jyn

Castiel – 12 – has anyone ever told you you look like you’re trying to pass gas all the time? – Harley Quinn

Catherine Alexander – 12 – I’m sorry I wasn’t there when you needed me most. I love you, little sister. – Haven Barthelemy

Chloe Decker – 12 – As usual, I am sorry. Come to Lux this evening so I can make it up to you. – Lucifer Morningstar

Chris Halliwell – 12 – I love you, Chris Halliwell. I always have and I always will. Happy Valentine’s Day! – Astoria Malfoy

Clarke Griffin – 2 – Regulus Black

Clarke Griffin – 12 – A reminder to grasp that chance at happiness. – Thor Odinson

Clio Celestia-Palpatine – 1 – Rey

Connor Murphy – 1 – 'love you bro' – John Murphy.

Connor Murphy – 12 – The son of Aphrodite being terrible at writing love notes, can you believe that? But I hope you enjoy the roses because a cutie like you deserves them all. – Lukas Zapolya

Cordé – 3 – Sabé

Cordé – 1 – Padmé Naberrie

Cordé – 12 – Thank you for taking care of Alex like he is your own, and just being his other mom. You were and still are the exact person we need in our lives and I'm glad to call you my girlfriend. Love you, sweetheart! – Narcissa Black

Daphne Greengrass – 12 – I love you, Daph. You’re the best big sister I could have ever asked for. – Astoria Malfoy

Dean Winchester – 6 – see you later ;) – Sharon Carter

Diana Prince – 3 – Bruce Wayne

Diana Prince – 6 – We wouldn’t be a team without you. – Clark Kent

Diana Prince – 12 – you’re deadly and beautiful. like a poisonous snake! – Harley Quinn

Dominique Weasley – 1 – happy valentine's day, cousin! – Roxanne "Rox" Weasley

Dominique Weasley – 1 – happy valentine’s, cuz! – Rose Granger-Weasley

Dorothea Wildes – 12 – I can have two valentines, right? – Georgina “Georgie” Weaver

Dorothea Wildes – 12 – Don’t tell Georgie. – Sirius Black

Dorothea Wildes – 6 – For a woman with taste. – Lestat de Lioncourt

Dorothea Wildes – 2 – Best professor ever. – Rose Granger-Weasley

Draco Malfoy – 1 – Rose Granger-Weasley

D-O – 1 – Rey

D-O – 3 – Jyn

Eleanor "Nell" Crain-Vance – 3 – Happy Valentine’s, Nell! – Nancy Wheeler

Eleanor “Nell” Crain-Vance  – 1 – I carry your heart with me – Olivia Crain

Eleanor “Nell” Crain-Vance – 2 – I love you, Nellie. – Steve Crain

Eleanor “Nell” Crain-Vance – 1 – Sending you wishes of happiness. – Laszlo Kreizler

Eleanor “Nell” Crain-Vance – 12 – Let’s adopt that lizard. – Jim Halpert

Ella – 12 – Cherie. – Lestat de Lioncourt

Ella – 1 – To a life free of unkindness. – Laszlo Kreizler

Elsa Arendelle – 2 – "Sisters forever, love Anna" – Anna Arendelle

Emma Swan – 6 – Killian Jones

Emma Swan – 11 – Eleven roses for the eleven years it's been since I found you in Boston when I was ten. Love you, mom! – Henry Mills

Emori – 12 – 'for the future mrs murphy' – John Murphy

Emori – 3 – happy valentine’s day! – Anduin Wrynn

Enjolras – 12 – Grantaire

Eros – 12 – for the god of love and beauty on the day of love from a beauty! – Estelle Jackson-Blofis

Estelle Blofis – 3 – For my partner in crime. – Varian

Estelle Blofis – 5 – Happy Valentine's Day, Starshine! – Eros

Faith Lehane – 1 – to prove that i am very sweet and not scary. – Jester

Finn – 1 – Rey

Finn – 12 – Poe Dameron

Finn – 2 – Congratulations. Give one to Poe. – Mando

Finn – 12 – happy Valentine’s Day, sunshine! Thank you for always seeing the good in me. – Sonia Tate

Finn – 1 – Leia Organa

Finn – 12 – Congratulations, friend! – D-O

Frederick Frankenstein – 6 – for my favorite doctor, even though the traveler is a way better doctor because he’s the coolest – Jester

Flynn Rider – 12 – I love you so very much! – Rapunzel Corona

Genevieve “Genna” Fair – 12 – Thor Odinson

Genevieve “Genna” Fair – 1 – I hear sorcerers are especially sweey on Valentine’s Day. Just a thought. – Liv Starfleet

Genevieve “Genna” Fair – 1 – I’ll do my best not to step on your toes next time we dance. – Stephen Strange

Genevieve “Genna” Fair – for my doppleganger. – Ella

Georgina “Georgie” Hart – 12 – you make my tail wag! – Sirius Black

Geralt of Rivia – 1 – Get that DICK! 8====D – Wynonna Earp

Ginerva “Ginny” Weasley – 2 – You’re the coolest auntie ever. – Rose Granger-Weasley

Han Solo – 6 – Leia Organa

Harry Osborn – 12 – to my bestest friend and my partner in crime. Love you, darling! – Alice Kingsleigh

Harry Osborn – 12 – I will love you always – Peter Parker

Harry Potter – 2 – one from each of the dumbasses you look after. Thanks for keeping us alive, babes! – Estelle Jackson-Blofis

Harry Potter – 6 – Thinking about you! – Hermione Granger

Harry Potter – 2 – Not to scare you or anything, but you’re a bangin’ uncle. – Rose Granger-Weasley

Harley Quinn – 3 – Bruce Wayne

Harley Quinn – 1 – for my fellow chaos agent – Jester

Haven Barthelemy – 5 – I know these don't fit your aesthetic, but still I hope you enjoy them. – Henrik Mikaelson

Hayley Marshall – 1 – I would be remiss not to send you a rose the color of my now blood stained shirt. – Lucifer Morningstar

Helga Hufflepuff – 1 – Roxanne "Rox" Weasley

Helga Hufflepuff – 1 – Sirius Black

Hermione Granger – 6 – You’re the best mum. I love you! – Rose Granger-Weasley

Hope Swan-Jones – 12 – "Did I make you smile?" – Killian Jones

Hope Swan-Jones – 5 – For the sweetest little sister, I just actually met! I hope you like your flowers! – Henry Mills

Isobel Reinwood – 2 – Regulus Black

Isobel Reinwood – 12 – Thank you for making me a father, and just the happiest I've ever been in a while. Through the good and the bad, I'll always love you. – Sebastian Blackwood

Jack Frost – 2 – Thank you for always making me so happy, I can't not smile around you. – love, Hope Swan-Jones

Jack Frost – 1 – Royal Dupuis

Jack Skellington – 3 – from your dearest friend. I love you, jack. – Sally

Jaskier – 1 – Cheers! – Lucifer Morningstar

Jaskier – 1 – I owe you this. Meet me by the shore. – Geralt of Rivia

Jasmine Badroulbadour – 1 – "To my best friend, love Anna" – Anna Arendelle

Jasmine Badroulbadour – 12 – I've never been the best with words, but I love you more than anything in this world. – Varian

Jennifer Jareau – 10 – thank you for showing up – Spencer Reid

Jessica Jones – 1 – Cheers! – Lucifer Morningstar

Jessica Jones – 1 – I told them to pick the least romantic. – Matt Murdock

Jessica Jones – 3 – for a fellow archivist – Karen

Jessica Jones – 12 – you look like you’ve never smiled a day in your life, so: knock knock – Harley Quinn

Jester Lavorre – 12 – happy valentines day, valentine! xoxoxo – Mollymauk Tealeaf

Jester Lavorre – 1 – happy valentine’s day! – Rapunzel

Jester Lavorre – 12 – you’re cooler than the traveler – Sirius Black

Jester Lavorre – 1 – Your new look is rather horny. – Lucifer Morningstar

Jester Lavorre – 5 – i hope these find you well. frumpkin sends his love as well. happy valentines day. – Caleb Widogast

Jester Lavorre – 12 – welcome to earth, we love aliens! – Harley Quinn

Jim Halpert – 5 – Eleanor Crain Vance

Jo Wilson – 2 – April Kepner

Joey Potter – 12 – It was good to see you again after all this time Jo. Happy Valentines Day. x Pace - Pacey Witter

John Murphy – 6 – Emori

Jon Snow – 5 – I’ll always be on your side, Jon Snow. – Daenerys Targaryen

Jon Snow – 3 – You’re my favorite person. – Arya Stark

Jyn Erso – 1 – thank you for being there. – Cassian Andor

Jyn Erso – 1 – Leia Organa

Karen Page – 1 – Sharon Carter

Karen Page – 1 – I missed your voice. – Matt Murdock

Kaz Brekker – 12 – you look like the kinda guy who really puts the ‘fun’ in ‘funeral’! – Harley Quinn

Kiarace – 1 – Anduin Wrynn

Korra – 3 – Thank you. – Elsa Arendelle

Lara Croft – 3 – Happy Valentine’s, Lara! – Nancy Wheeler

Lara Croft – 6 – for giving a damn. – Max Rockatansky

Leia Organa-Solo – 1 – Rey

Leia Organa-Solo – 1 – I love you. – Ben Solo

Leia Organa-Solo – 1 – Not even my dreams for the future could have captured everything you’ve become. I love you. – Padmé Naberrie

Leia Organa-Solo – 1 – here’s to many more years together again. – Jyn

Leonard “Bones” McCoy – 12 – thanks for not sticking a needle in me for the last 12 hours – James “Jim” Kirk

Leonard Snart – 1 – Cheers! – Lucifer Morningstar

Lestat de Lioncourt – 12 – i cannot fit all the reasons why i adore you on a note, monseuir. – Ella

Lexie Grey – 2 – April Kepner

Lexie Grey – 2 – I’ve heard so many stories I feel like I know you. Happy Valentine’s! – Mike Hanlon

Liv Starfleet – 12 – I love you so very dearly. – Loki Odinson

Liv Starfleet – 1 – Have a good Valentine’s day! – Genevieve "Genna" Fair

Loki Odinson – 1 – Cheers! – Lucifer Morningstar

Loki Odinson – 12 – please send anonymously – Thor Odinson

Loki Odinson – 4 – Is that magic in the air, or are you just happy to see me? – Liv Starfleet

Lorenzo Diaz – 10 – for every year we were together, for every year we were apart, and one for every person I left behind. – Ava Diaz

Lucifer Morningstar – 8 – One for every inch ;P – Wynonna Earp

Lucifer Morningstar – 6 – proof that i am very sweet even if i do make fun of you sometimes – Jester

Lukas Zapolya – 12 – missed you, brother! Thank you for always being their for me. – Piper McLean

Lukas Zapolya – 12 – thanks for being stupid with me, lover boy. – Estelle Jackson-Blofis

Luke Castellan – 1 – 'happy v day, asshole' – Faith Lehane.

Luke Castellan – 6 – for every year I wasn’t there. I’m sorry, little brother. You’re stronger than I ever was. – Haven Barthelemy

Luke Crain – 1 – I carry your heart with me – Olivia Crain

Luke Crain – 1 – Eleanor Crain Vance

Luke Crain – 1 – Steve Crain

Luke Skywalker – 6 – Leia Organa

Luke Skywalker – 1 – I’m so proud of you, and I hope I soon find the courage to tell you personally. – Padmé Naberrie

Lyanna Stark – 1 – Tony Stark

Mal Florian – 12 – For each year i've loved you and more – Ben Florian

Mal Florian – 12 – Did I mention that I love you and always will. – Ben Florian

Malcolm Bright – 6 – i hope you have a great valentine’s day! – Anna Minkova

Mando – 12 – You'll always have a place in my heart. – Finn

Mare Barrow – 12 – don’t be afraid of the lightning that comes from inside you – Thor Odinson

Maria Stark – 6 – Tony Stark

Marinette Dupain-Cheng – 1 – From one hero to another. – Clark Kent

Matthew Murdock – 6 – Karen Page

Max Rockatansky – 3 – 'a reminder that earth is beautiful' – Lara Croft

Max Rockatansky – 1 – happy valentine’s day! – Leia Organa

Melinda Halliwell – 2 – one for you and one for our darling nephew! – Astoria Malfoy

Merlin – 3 – to my favorite magician. – Ella

Mike Hanlon – 12 – April Kepner

Mike Warren – 1 – Cheers! – Lucifer Morningstar

Mike Warren – 1 – happy v-day, man – Jim Halpert

Millie Harcourt – 12 – what would I do without you? – Mike Warren

Minerva McGonagall – 12 – Thank you for always believing in me, professor. I’m sorry I was never as strong as you thought i was. – Emma Vanity

Minerva McGonagall – 3 – happy valentine’s day, professor! – Hermoine Granger

Minerva McGonagall – 1 – happy v-day, mcgonagall!! – Georgina “Georgie” Weaver

Minerva McGonagall – 1 – Dorothea Wildes

Mollymauk Tealeaf – 5 – i know my memory isn't much, but i felt like i should still send you something for today. i hope your day is well. happy valentines day.– Caleb Widogast

Mollymauk Tealeaf – 12 – for my favorite tarot card reader. – Jester Lavorre

Montgomery “Scotty” Scott – 12 – fix my ship. – James “Jim” Kirk

Montgomery “Scotty” Scott – 3 – add some rose to your teas, it tastes delicious. – Ella

Naivara Galanodel – 3 – Rapunzel Corona

Nancy Wheeler – 1 – Lara Croft

Nancy Wheeler – 12 – Thor Odinson

Narcissa Malfoy – 12 – the love of my life, the mother of our son, my reason for coming back. Happy Valentine’s Day, beautiful! – Cordé

Natasha Romanoff – 3 – Thinking about you for Valentine’s day. – Steve Rogers

Natasha Romanoff – 1 – have a good valentine’s, romanoff. – Tony Stark

Natasha Romanoff – 1 –  they said to keep this short, but remember italy and that forged painting? –  Sharon Carter

Nick Scratch – 12 – I know things are a little complicated right now, but know that I love you. – Harvey Kinkle

Nyota Uhura – 12 – no one speaks klingon like you, but please don’t yell at me in it anymore. – James “Jim” Kirk

Obi-wan Kenobi – 1 – Rey

Obi-wan Kenobi – 1 – You have the kindest smile in the universe. – Padmé Naberrie

Obi-wan Kenobi – 1 – you are the force and the force is with you. trust it. – Jyn Erso

Octavia Blake – 1 – Cheers! – Lucifer Morningstar

Olivia Crain – 1 – Eleanor Crain Vance

Olivia Crain – 1 – Steve Crain

Olivia Crain – 1 – Cheers! – Lucifer Morningstar

Padmé Naberrie – 1 – Rey

Padmé Naberrie – 1 – Happy Valentine’s, Padmé – Sabé Andierre

Padmé Naberrie – 6 – happy valentine’s, padmé! – Obi-Wan Kenobi

Padmé Naberrie – 3 – reaching towards a better tomorrow – Jyn

Percy Jackson – 2 – two peas in a pod, water boy – Piper McLean

Percy Jackson – 1 – I love you, big brother. – Estelle Jackson-Blofis

Percy Jackson – 1 – You're my something permanent, seaweed brain - love, Annabeth Chase,

Persephone – 12 – i love you – Hades

Peter Parker – 2 – thanks for putting up with me, petey! Glad to have you back. – Estelle Jackson-Blofis

Peter Parker – 12 – I couldn't image my life without you. It's always been you, Pete. – Harry Osborn

Peter Parker – 12 – enjoy the day of love, spiderling! – Thor Odinson

Phyrra Amakiir – 1 – Sharon Carter

Phyrra Amakiir – 1 – Have a magical day! – Snow White

Pietro Maximoff – 3 – Anna Minkova

Pietro Maximoff – 12 – Thor Odinson

Pietro Maximoff – 12 – for every minute between us. – Wanda Maximoff

Piper McLean – 1 – A beautiful rose for a beautiful girl - love, Annabeth Chase

Poe Dameron – 1 – Rey

Poe Dameron – 1 – Leia Organa

Poe Dameron – 12 – For my future husband, the absolute love of my life. – Finn

Poe Dameron – 12 – Congratulations, friend! – D-O

Poe Dameron – 1 – thank you. – Jyn

Prue Halliwell – 1 – thank you for giving the family I never had – Astoria Malfoy

Prue Halliwell – 1 – Andy Trudeau

Rapunzel Corona – 12 – will you m... just kidding. not yet. – Flynn Rider

Rapunzel Corona – 6 – Elsa Arendelle

Rapunzel Corona – 3 – You're the best friend I've ever had. Thank you for accepting me as I am. – Varian

Rapunzel Corona – 3 – have a day as beautiful as you. – Ella

Rebekah Mikaelson – 5 – Have a wonderful Valentine's Day, Sister. – Henrik Mikaelson

Rebekah Mikaelson – 12 – remember, barbie: boys stink! – Harley Quinn

Red – 1 – Sam Winchester

Red – 1 – Steve Crain

Regina Mills – 12 – happy valentine's day, i love you! – Tony Stark

Regina Mills– 12 – Roses as red as the apples from your apple tree. I wish I can give you twenty one as that's how long it's been since we first met when I was a baby, but twelve would have to do. Love you, mom! – Henry Mills

Remus Lupin – 3 – Georgina "Georgie" Weaver

Rey – 1 – i hope you have a good valentine's day! – Leia Organa

Rey – 1 – Obi-wan Kenobi

Rey – 2 – Ben Solo

Rey – 12 – You are the best friend! – D-O

Rey – 1 – I’m so glad I can be a part of your life. – Padmé Naberrie

Rey – 12 – Thank you for seeing me like no one ever has. – Finn

Rey – 5 – here’s to new friendships – Jyn

Rhaegar Targaryen – 5 – Daenerys Targaryen

Rose Granger-Weasley – 12 – roses for my rose <3 – Royal Dupuis

Rose Granger-Weasley – 5 – i hope you have an amazing valentine’s day! – Anduin Wrynn

Rose Granger-Weasley – 6 – Happy Valentine’s day, love! – Hermione Granger

Rose Granger-Weasley – 1 – happy v-day, cousin! – Roxanne “Rox” Weasley

Roxanne “Rox” Weasley – 1 – Cheers! – Lucifer Morningstar

Roxanne “Rox” Weasley – 3 – happy valentine’s day, rox! next time i go off a cliff i’m taking you with me. – Rose Granger-Weasley

Royal Dupuis – 12 – You always know how to make me smile. – Rose Granger-Weasley

Sabé Andierre – 12 – You have a nice laugh but I’m bad at telling jokes on paper, so hopefully this at least gets a smile. – James “Jim” Kirk

Sabé Andierre – 1 – Padmé Naberrie

Salazar Slytherin – 2 – from the twins – Isobel Reinwood

Salazar Slytherin – 1 – "Thanks for everything" - Anne Shirley Cuthbert

Salazar Slytherin – 12 – "I cannot wait to spend the rest of our lives together" - Helga Hufflepuff

Sam Winchester – 3 – happy valentine’s day! – Sharon Carter

Sansa Stark – 6 – Jon Snow

Sansa Stark – 1 – Tony Stark

Sebastian Blackwood – 3 – one from each of the people who love you the most. Happy valentine’s, darling! – Isobel Reinwood

Sherlock Holmes – 1 – Cheers! – Lucifer Morningstar

Sherlock Holmes – 1 –  Don’t forget to celebrate. – Laszlo Kreizler

Sirius Black – 6 – sorry for painting a dick on your door, next time i’ll choose a more tasteful place ;) – Jester

Sonia Tate – 12 – To my absolute best friend, and platonic soulmate. – Finn

Spencer Reid – 1 – Malcolm Bright

Spencer Reid – 6 – i hope you have a happy valentine’s day! – Ella

Spencer Reid – 12 – it’s nice to see a fellow freak with a phd! – Harley Quinn

Spock – 12 – happy valentine’s day, you pointy-eared bastard. – James “Jim” Kirk

Stephen Strange – 1 – happy valentine’s day! would you be mine? :) – Genevieve "Genna" Fair

Steve Rogers – 3 – I’m glad we got you out of that ice. – Natasha Romanoff

Steve Rogers – 12 – I’m glad you kept the beard! – Thor Odinson

Steve Rogers – 1 – For believing in me. – Wanda Maximoff

Steve Rogers – 1 – You’re a terrible flirt. – Bucky Barnes

Steven Crain – 1 – I carry your heart with me – Olivia Crain

Steven Crain – 1 – Eleanor Crain Vance

Suki – 6 – happy valentines day! thought you'd like something :) – Aang

Thalia Grace – 1 – Wynonna Earp

Thalia Grace – 1 – I'm so grateful to have you as a best friend/sister - love, Annabeth Chase

Thor Odinson – 6 – I hope you have a good Valentine’s Day! – Nancy Wheeler

Thor Odinson – 1 – Clarke Griffin

Thor Odinson – 1 – happy valentine’s to the strongest avenger! – Genevieve “Genna” Fair

Tinkerbell – 12 – I just have a question, would you like to be my girlfriend?– Wendy Darling

Tommy Shepherd – 1 – I hope I can be the mother you deserve. – Wanda Maximoff

Tony Stark – 6 – Thank you for being mine. – Regina Mills

Tony Stark – 1 – Get over it. – Natasha Romanoff

Tony Stark – 12 – Thor Odinson

Valis – 12 – happy Valentine’s Day, darling. I love you, my deliciously beautiful wife. – Damaia

Varian – 12 – happy Valentine’s Day, baby! You make me so happy, and I fall in love with you more and more each day – Jasmine Badroulbadour

Varian – 2 – guess who’s partner in crime is back? – Estelle jackson-Blofis

Varian – 1 – smile, kid! – Flynn Ryder

Varian – 1 – happy valentine’s day, varian! – Rapunzel Corona

Veronica Lodge – 1 – Royal Dupuis

Vex’ahlia de Rolo – 2 – one rose for you and one for trinket! – Jester

Wanda Maximova – 3 – Happy Valentine’s day! – Anna Minkova

Wanda Maximova – 1 – I hope you have a good Valentine’s Day, Wanda. – Steve Rogers

Wendy Darling – 12 – you’re it. You’re my dearest thing. My darling little Wendy bird. I love you. – Tinkerbell

Wes – 1 – Royal Dupuis

Westley – 1 – farm boy... love me, will you? – Buttercup

Will Byers – 1 – Roxanne "Rox" Weasley

Wyatt Halliwell – 6 – You deserve more. For what it’s worth, you’re still my friend. No matter what. - Astoria Malfoy

Wyatt Halliwell – 12 – "I know I fucked up" – Newt Glade

Wynonna Earp – 2 – One for the day you penetrated me, and one for the day I penetrated you. –  Lucifer Morningstar

Wynonna Earp – 12 – coolest. gun. ever! – Harley Quinn

Zuko – 1 – Suki

Zuko – 6 – i hope you're doing better. i miss you and am here if you need to talk. happy valentines day. – Aang

[extremelyblackandwhite]

a new beginning - 03

Pairing: LOTR! James “Bucky” Barnes x Reader

Warnings: so far go right ahead, no danger.

A/N: i’m just gonna say it, young y/n and legolas were faramir and éowyn worse nightmares. don’t let legolas babysit your children. also let me know your theories, do you side with y/n’s hope or not? let me know your opinions.

Main Masterlist

The young princess was sat in her library, the book in the middle of her legs as she lost herself in her own adventures wondering what life was during the supposed ever lasting peace age of Middle Earth. She wondered what the trees looked like when they whispered to each other, how the flowers grew, how people would be able to walk out of the borders. Sometimes, she’d dream about it, she would see it but she knew those dreams were nothing other than tales from her parents gaining life in her dreams. 

She closed her book at looking at the celling painted with images from the battle of Helms Deep until a slight sound startled her. She had extreme good hearing from all the years playing hide and seek with Legolas when she was young and insisting on winning. Her eyes turned to the door to see the man from before look impressed by the room. 

    - It’s fantastic isn’t it? - she said, almost scaring the man who wasn’t expecting to see someone there. - I didn’t expect my parents to let you roam around.

   - The chambermaids said it would be best to walk around. - he felt starstruck by her presence. In all of his life he’d never met such being that would make him feel inadequate. Maybe it was because she was princess and he’d never met one in all of his life or maybe it was her posture and how she carried herself. - Is this yours?

   - I just fill it. It’s Rohan’s. - she replied, getting up to place her book back in her own little shelf. - There’s not much you can do when you live in constant fear.

   - Are you afraid, milady? - he questioned her but only got a playful smile and somehow that was enough of an answer. She walked over to her white shelf, her long deep red gown draping down the grounds and picked a similar coloured book before walking back to him. - The Lord of the Rings?

  - It was a gift. - she replied, handing it to him. - It’s a good read. 

  - Please. - he rolled his eyes, chuckling as she showed him a confused face which he found adorable. - Don’t tell me you believe in all of this.

  - It happened. - she crossed her arms, sure of her convictions. After all, she grew up with most of the fellowship of the ring around her telling her tales of their adventures. - Do you not believe in something that actually happened?

  - I do, I just don’t believe how heroic they were made to be. Sure they did honourable stuff but Aragorn could’ve not use the undead army just by raising Issildur’s sword. - he said. - They’re just children tales, just like the heir legend.

  - Why do you believe it to be a legend?

  - I believed someone made it up to make children believe the hell we live can be saved. It can’t, milady. There’s a reason the elves left. - he pointed out, handing her back the book. - We make our own faith, milady.

  - There is hope, sir. - the princess took the book back to its shelf. There was a reason Legolas had nicknamed her the Estel Princess. It meant hope and despite everyone around her believing her cause hopeless, she was always hopeful that life would find a way. - I just realised I never asked your name, sir.

  - It’s James, milady.

  - Y/N, call me Y/N. - she interrupted before he could complete it. - Where do you come from, James?

  - I don’t known, Y/N. - he made her smile by using her name. - I don’t remember much of my childhood. 

  - I’m sorry. - she took a seat by the entry door, offering him a seat by her. She couldn’t imagine not remember her childhood, her childhood had been just memories of love and laughter. Legolas and Gimli would come visit a least once a month when she was a child and would entertain her with stories of the ring and the journey and her parents would give her the most love they could. 

  - I’ve never seen or met a princess before, to be completely honest. I owe you my gratitude for saving me, Y/N.

  - We have to save our own. - she smiled softly at him. - Besides, it was always a chance to go outside.

  - You’ve never been outside?

  - It’s not exactly safe and I’m an only child. If I die there is no one to look over Rohan and our people come first. - she surprised herself by how much she sounded like her mother. - But I do have to admit I wonder what it’s like to be a ranger. 

  - It’s not something you should aspire to be, Y/N.

  - But it is something.

[gaamagirl565]

Matters of the heart episode 4

MENTIONS OF BLOOD and very slight graphic depictions of injury. Illness and medical procedure

Matters of the Heart

Episode 4: 

Facing the past

{open to Varian in a dark room walking around confused}

Varian: ...Isaiah?...Isaiah where are you?

{he keeps looking around in the darkness and suddenly hears a voice calling him; he turns around and sees a figure in the distance; he squints to get a better look} Varian:...Estelle? Estelle:....... Varian: ha! ESTELLE! {he runs to her and goes to embrace her but falls through her, hitting the ground harshly} Varian:...E-Estelle? Estelle: you failed us! {Estelle vanishes and Varian looks shocked and confused; suddenly he’s in the town square and people walk past him} Person 1: serves that boy right! I suppose the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree… Person 2: indeed! Traitors and dangers to society! Both of them! Person 3: at least we don’t have to worry about the boy anymore. Varian: I-Isaiah!? {Varian stands in a Cemetary and looks around; he looks down at a headstone and sees Isaiah’s name on it} Varian: W-WHAT!? NO! NO! ISAIAH! {Varian’s scream echos and we cut to Varian Jumping up from the chair he was sleeping in; he breathes heavily and looks around; Ruddiger climbs on his shoulder and nuzzles him} Varian: I..I’m ok buddy...just a..Bad dream… Ruddiger: *chitters worriedly* {Varian gets up from his chair} Varian: What was I doing again?...Oh...right… {he looks at his workbench covered in Various herbs, books, and chemicals} Varian: His fever has only gotten worse Ruddiger... I’ve tried everything! Yarrow, Feverfew, Elderberries...I’ve even tried Alchemical concoctions! Ruddiger: *chitters sadly* Varian: What do I do…? {thunder crashes outside and startles the pair} Varian: Rain?... Normally I would have heard him panicking by now...he hates rain...but...Ruddiger I don’t know what to do...he slips in and out of consciousness, he’s delirious from fever, and his cough is… {he leans against the wall and sinks to the floor; there’s a loud knock at the door} Varian: We’re closed… Quirin: Son it’s me! Varian: oh…*he gets up and unlocks the door* Quirin: it’s really coming down...hope our crops don’t get waterlogged. Varian: *makes a tired smile* I’m sure we’ll be ok… Quirn: How’s he doing?

{Varian runs his hand through his hair and sighs} Varian: not good… Quirin: may I see him? {Varian nods and leads Quirin upstairs and opens the door to Isaiah’s room; Isaiah lays in his bed breathing heavily and sweating; his bandage covering his eye has a reddish-brown stain; Varian walks over grabbing a cloth from the water basin next to his bed and places it on his head} Isaiah: *whimpers* Varian: shhh, it’s just me… Isaiah: *quiets down* Quirin: still no luck with the fever? Varian: no...I don’t...Dad I don’t know what else we can do… Quirin: what are you saying? Varian: if the physician won’t help...and I can’t bring down the fever...Isaiah’s going to- Quirin: Don’t you dare talk like that! Varian, you are the most stubborn person I’ve ever met! And this boy is your son! Look at him! {Varian looks over at Isaiah} Quirin: He’s not giving up...So don’t you give up on him. {Isaiah coughs and sputters; Varian takes Isaiah’s hand and holds it} Varian: shhh..buddy I’m here...I’m here.. {Quirin smiles; cut to early evening Varian sits by Isaiah’s bedside slowly nodding off, his eyes droop and soon he closes them and hangs his head before Isaiah’s violent coughing rips him from sleep} Varian: easy there buddy… {He reaches over and feels his head; the fever got worse} Varian: *bites lip* {reaching for the pale of water and ladle he kept at the foot of the bed.  And lifting Isaiah’s fragile body up to rest against him he scoops some of the water and brings the ladle to his son’s mouth} Isaiah: *groans* Varian: I know Isaiah...But you need to drink...please. for me… {Isaiah slightly opens his mouth and drinks; water begins to drip down his chin and he violently coughs; Varian grabs the cloth and wipes his chin but gasps and drops the cloth when he sees blood on it} Varian: b-blood...he’s coughing blood… {Varian leans back in his chair with a look of horror and covering his mouth} Ruddiger: *chitters* Varian: Ruddiger if I don’t do something NOW Isaiah...is going to die…But what can I do!? I’ve changed his bandages, kept him hydrated, and I’ve tried every remedy… Ruddiger:...*chitters excitedly* Varian: The...Queen? Rapunzel? At this hour!? Ruddiger: *tugs on Varian’s pantleg* Varian: but...I’d have to leave his side! {Ruddiger jumps up on Isaiah’s bed and happily chitters} Varian:....Ruddiger...The last times I went to her for help...bad thing came of it.. {ruddiger jumps on him and gives him confidence nuzzles} Varian: no...You’re right...I have to do this… {he walks over to Isaiah and kisses his forhead} Varian: I’ll be back soon...I love you, buddy… {Varian grabs his coat and runs downstairs; thunder claps; he opens his door and looks out at the rain; he gets a flashback causing him to see the rain as snow for a split second} Varian: stop it...he needs this… {Taking in a deep breath Varian rushes out into the rain and to the stable on the side of his house; he quickly tacks up his horse and mounts her; he signals her to gallop; when they’re some ways away Varian looks back at his house} Varian:...please...stay alive… {fade to Isaiah waking up in a royal looking bed room} Isaiah: mmnn...huh?...ugghhh I hate morning..*goes to stretch*...wait...this isn’t my room… or at least...i don’t think it is… {he looks around the room noticing familiar objects like toys, books, and paintings} Isaiah: this...This is my room...it’s my old room..from when mother...Mother… {He leaps from the bed and runs through the door dashing down the hallway} Isaiah: Mother!? Mother where are you!? {He runs throughout the hall and trips on a rug, faceplanting} Isaiah: Augh!...I always hated those rugs… {as he lays on the ground a familiar green fabric comes into veiw} Estelle: Isaiah...What are you doing? {Isaiah bolts his head up and looks wide eyed at his mother} Isaiah: Mother...Mummy! {He and Estelle embrace each other} Estelle: ...oh, my sweet boy… Isaiah: I’ve missed you so much... Estelle: shhh, I’m here now… Isaiah: you’ve missed so much… Estelle: no. I haven’t missed a thing. I’m with you every day… Isaiah: Oh! Wait till dad sees you! He’s going to be-...wait...where is dad?...Dad?? Estelle: Sweetheart your dad isn’t here… Isaiah: huh? Estelle: Isaiah...you are on the verge of life or death...you are very ill. Do you remember what happened? {isaiah stops to think} Isaiah:...The marketplace...Nathaniel...my bomb… {Estelle nods} Isaiah: am...am I dying? Estelle: I think that depends on you. Isaiah: B-but...I just got you back! I don’t want to lose you again! But dad he...he’d be all alone...Don’t..Don’t make me choose mother! I can’t! Estelle: Sweetheart… Isaiah: no it’s not fair! I don’t want to die but I don’t want to lose you! {Isaiah cries} Estelle: Isaiah look at me...look at me. I love you and i’ll be with you no matter what you choose. I was never truly gone, honey… {isaiah hugs her} Isaiah: ...I love you, mother… {Cut to Varian riding through the castle gates and stopping in front of the stone steps} Pete: Varian? {Varian hops off the horse and runs up the steps} Guards: HALT! State your business! Varian: I’m a friend of the queen. It’s urgent I swear! {the two guards stare at him and then each other} Pete: I’ll lead him in… Stan: you sure Pete? Pete: yeah..don’t worry this scrawny guy couldn’t defeat me if he tried. Varian:...I don’t know if I should say thank you or screw you… Pete: *snerk* c’mon… {Pete leads him through the halls and past the throne room worrying varian} Varian: we’re not going to the throne room? Pete: the royal family doesn’t just live in the throne room ya know… {Varian takes a deep breath; Pete stops outside a large door} Pete: wait here… {he walks in and sees Queen Rapunzel sitting and reading} Pete: Your majesty? Rapunzel: hmm? Oh, Yes pete? Pete: Visitor for you. He says it’s urgent. Rapunzel: oh? At this hour? Very well let him in… Pete: of course...You may enter… {Varian runs in} Rapunzel: *stands* Varian!? What’s wrong!? Varian: Your majesty please. It’s Isaiah, his wound got infected and he’s gotten so much worse. his fever is so high, his cough, the blood and- {Rapunzel places a finger on his lips to stop him} Rapunzel: Varian calm down. Take a deep breath and tell me whats wrong. {Varian does as he is told} Varian: Isaiah’s wound has gotten worse. it’s infected and the village has all but shunned him. the physician won’t help him. he has a fever and his coughing blood. Rapunzel please…I can’t lose him too. Please you have to help me this time. {Rapunzel looks shocked and then saddened} Rapunzel: oh Varian… {She gets a determined look} Rapunzel: Guards! Fetch the royal medic immediately! Guard: Right away! {Varian looks shocked then smiles and hugs her} Varian: Thank you…Thank you so much. Rapunzel: I never break my promises...you know that… Varian: yeah...I guess I do… {The medic walks in} Medic: Your majesty…*bows* you summoned me? Rapunzel: indeed I did madam. We’re going to Old Corona. Medic:...P-Pardon? Rapunzel: You have a Special Patient there… Medic: oh? Varian: Please ma’am, my son recently was in an accident that left him with a severe burn on his eye. I fear it’s infected. No one in my village will help! He’ll die… Medic: h-how old is your boy? Varian: he’s only 12… {The medic looks shocked and then serious as she turns to the door} Medic: let’s go! Tell me his symptoms on the way…. Rapunzel: Coming! Varian: Y-yes ma’am! {fade to them arriving at Varian’s home; as the enter through the lab the medic is surprised} Medic: you dabble in the medicinal arts as well? Varian: I’m the apothecary for my village…

Medic and his fever still won’t go down? Varian: no… Medic: Show me to his room… {Varian leads them upstairs and into Isaiah’s room; Rapunzel gasps upon seeing the state he’s in} Medic: hmm...sweating...fever, cough, delirium...have you properly changed his bandages? Varian: Y-yes of course! {The medic unwraps his bandage; Rapunzel turns away in disgust; Varian also flinches} Medic: Gangrene… Varian: huh? Medic:  his wound has become gangrenous...And judging from all the other symptoms I'm guessing the infection has seeped into his bloodstream... your son has blood poisoning… Rapunzel: Is there anything you can do? Medic:  I have a salve that will treat the infection in the burn but it won’t be pleasent…I'll also need to scrape away any visible infection {She goes into her bag and retrieves a small can of herbs; she grinds them up and makes a paste} Varian: is ok if I hold his hand? Medic: Of course...I'm not going to lie this is going to sting so you trying to distract him is probably the best you can do. Varian: Isaiah?..Buddy?..It’s going to be ok...I’m here… {The medic begins the procedure and spreads the salve over the burn; Isaiah yelps and grits his teeth} Rapunzel: It’s okay sweetheart...I know it hurts…almost done Varian: Daddy’s here...I’m here… Medic: Okay okay! It’s done! We’re done! Varian: All done! Brave little man. {The medic takes out fresh bandages and re-bandages his face; she also takes out some herbs and a glass bottle} Medic: here...These herbs will stop his coughing and repair his lungs put it in his food.  and this bottle has medicine that will remove the infection from his blood.  give him one teaspoon after every meal it's not exactly the best tasting but it'll do the job.  also, keep his eye bandaged for at least another month try not to get any dirt in it and clean it regularly. Varian:  I can't thank you enough… Medic: One more thing... during the procedure I examined the actual eye... it appears that whatever chemical he used may have damaged the optic nerve.  an infection hasn't helped either.  I'm sorry there's absolutely no hope for his sight at least in that eye. Rapunzel: *gasp* Varian: He’s...What are you saying?... are you saying my son is... blind? Medic:  in that eye... unfortunately... I'm so sorry… Varian: than...Thank you anyway… Medic: of course… {she goes to leaves; Rapunzel goes up and hugs Varian} Rapunzel: If you ever need me you know where to find me... Varian: of course...thank you Rapunzel… {Rapunzel walks out and Varian stands at the door and watches them leave; he looks down at the bottle in his hands} Varian:....Don’t give up on him…. {Cut to some time later during the daytime} {Isaiah groans and rolls over in bed place his injured side on his pillow. He lurches up and cups the side of his face hissing in pain} Isaiah: Ow ow ow! What the heck...happened…? {he feels the cloth on his face} Isaiah: w-what? {Isaiah looks around the room} Isaiah: h-how did I..? wasn’t I just-!? {Pottery shattering is heard and Isaiah turns to see his father in the doorway with a shattered water basin at his feet; they stare at each other for a moment} Isaiah: ...Dad? {Varian rushes over to him and hugs him} Isaiah: DAD!? WH-.....wait… {he gets flashbacks of the explosion} Isaiah: d-dad…. Varian: You’re awake. and your fever…it’s gone. Thank God. {Varians face suddenly turns angry} Varian: WHAT WERE YOU THINKING!? Do you realize what you could have done!? You could’ve died! You almost killed someone!! {Isaiah’s eyes dilate in fear} Varian: And not only that! You lied to me! You used me! I examined your little concoction. You put silver fulminate in it!! Do you know how explosive that stuff is!? You’re lucky to be alive!! {Isaiah sobs} Isaiah: I-I’m s..so..sorry Da..daddy!! {He continues to sob; Varians face softens and he sighs in frustration} Varian: okay..okay…shhhh..Isaiah…shhhh.. {Varian climbs onto the small bed and pulls Isaiah into his arms, Isaiah digs his face into his father’s chest and clings to his shirt ignoring the pain from his burnt eye. Rocking his son back and forth Varian whispers reassuring words to him and rubs his back} Varian: Shhhh…Daddy’s here…It’s okay now… {Isaiah lets out muffled sobs into his father’s blue-grey shirt soaking the fabric. Within a few minutes, Isaiah’s sobs have quieted into hiccups and shaky breaths. he cries himself to sleep; Varian looks at his son and leans his head back falling asleep as well} {END CREDITS}

[nylaaaaa]

Little Secret

Chapter 1. Your Secret Is Safe With Me

Name and Surname: Natalie Fleur Estelle

Sex: Female

Date of Birth: 19th August 1692

Place ( Registration 

of      < District                     Cynthell

Birth  ( Sub-District

_________________________________________

"Here's the birth certificate. It has nothing about her parents on it as you suggested." I gave the man standing beside me, who had grown to be a brother to me, a quick, but satisfied, grunt of approval. 

"Thank you. Keep this between us and I'll keep up my end of the deal." Quintin gave me a questioning side glance. I knew he didn't appreciate me bringing up the past but I needed him to keep this between us.

"I don't see why you won't be honest to her. For all we know she might be like you..." I knew what he was suggesting, but I refused to listen. She won't be like me. She can't be like me. I waved him away, annoyance clear as day across my face. He will be annoyed too. We both have secrets. I just don't know whose is worth more.

_________________________________________

Today....

Today is possibly the worst day I'll have in my life. I'm honestly not sure. 

Today I officially turn 18 which, unluckily for me, means I have to add another thing to my job description.

Isaieth adopted me when I was born because my father died and it caused my mum to become a drunk. I don't exactly blame her for leaving and forgetting her troubles with a drink. But I also can't say I'm fond of it. I love Isaieth with all my heart, he feels like an actual father to me. But I sometimes wish I had an actual mother to help me grow as well.

When I was born my father died. No one told me how, I just know it was traumatic enough to make my mother a drunk. Isaieth adopted me when I was 2 after he had an accident that caused him to be deaf and partially blind. He wasn't fit for work anymore so the second I turned an age where I can go to the toilet by myself he taught me how to tend his farm. He makes a business by selling wheat that he grows and whatever we can get from the few animals we own. When I was 16 I found an abandoned lamb who we later discovered was a merino sheep. Merino sheep are, in my opinion, the best sheep you can get. Their carcasses are smaller than the average sheep so they aren't used for meat but rather for the wool that they grow. The average amount of wool the sheep grows is 11kg which is enough for about 11 sweaters. Aswell as the sheep we have 2 chickens, both of which are female. They were actually, in some ways, a gift from the king. The king and Isaieth are best friends almost from birth. They both grew up in royalty but only the king kept it that way. Isaieth was the son of a knight, and so in turn, Isaieth was also a knight. The king was born a prince and then was assigned a knight who happened to be Isaieth. One of the times when Isaieth was protecting the king he ended up getting seriously injured and the king fired him for his own safety. The king doesn't exactly care for the knight's wellbeing but because they were friends he decided a knight was too dangerous for Isaieth. After the event the king offered him a plot of land on the outskirts of the city that was run down and abandoned but had potential for a farm. Isaieth's dream as a boy was to grow old and have his own farm, so like any friend the king got him his own farm. Because of the friendship and countless times Isaieth saved his life our rent was greatly reduced and we were offered a permanent job to make sure we always had the money to pay rent. The job included selling off our produce from the animals. The eggs given to Isaieth was originally just starter food but Isaieth decided to keep them and let them hatch instead. When they grew to be quite old he kept a few of the last eggs they would hatch and did the same thing. The hens we have now are 1 years old, or will be in a few days. We don't get much from our farm but because of the discount on rent sometimes we have enough money to spare to get nice things. The average price of rent can go up to 100 gold.

(100 gold is like 1k, the money in this story is, bronze= pence or cents or whatever is the lowest in your country, silver= pounds or dollars etc and gold= the hundreds +. In simpler terms, but in GBP ((Great British Pounds)) terms, 1 bronze= 1 pence, 1 silver= 1 pound and 1 gold= 100 pound.)

Ours however got put down to 45 gold. It's still a lot that we just about make each month but we're still thankful that he even gave us this place to begin with. He didn't actually have to.

It's also lucky that our farm works well with rent times. Each month you have to go to the castle and pay your rent. If you dont have enough or you skip it they go to your house and either take a child, that becomes their servent who has to work for the money you didn't pay, or they take some belongings that you don't get back unless you pay extra. Luckily we've never seen it first hand but one of my childhood friends ended up becoming a servent from it. I haven't seen her since. Our wheat takes a month to grow so we've always got that to keep our money up. Unfortunately wheat sells cheap, one wheat grain sells for 30 bronze. Every month we grow, on average, 700 wheat grains but have to keep back 350 to replant so we can get 350 the next month too. So on average every month with wheat alone we make 10 gold and 5 silver. Which by itself is almost a quarter of our rent. Replanting and harvesting wheat is one of the most tedious jobs of farming, but maintaining is by far the easiest. You only have to water the plant at most once in summer but otherwise never. All you really have to do is make sure the plant isn't dying and be on your way. The worst job I have is turning the sheeps pelt into wool. She doesn't like to be milked so doing that is an annoyance but I dread making wool the most out of all the farm jobs I have. Next to maintaining the crop the hens are the easiest too. They lay at least one egg everyday, the only thing I have to do is collect the eggs without breaking them and make sure the hens are well fed and have fresh air. With making wool you have to flatten the pelt completely and then tie the strands together to make a really long piece of wool that I have to cut and ball up. It's the worst job on the entire farm but I can't say I hate doing it. My favourite thing is balling it all up after dying it. I'm just thankful all these things take a month to do or we'd be screwed on rent every month.

(Realistically these don't actually take a month, I researched so much to make the story as legit as possible but for story sake I tweaked the timing. Hens do lay one egg a day at least, if properly cared for and also depending on breed. But wheat takes a LOT longer to grow and you can only shave a sheep once a year. I changed the timing of it all tho or I'd have to be even more creative with money and stuff and tbh I'd rather not. Coming up with these ideas for the farm was hard enough.)

On average you get 2 balls of yarn out of 1kg of wool. Luckily for us our merino sheep produces 11kg of wool giving us 22 balls of yarn. 1 ball of yarn sells for 1 gold, so for 22 balls of yarn we make 22 gold. Personally I think it's extremely expensive but it does make sense considering there aren't many sheep around, which also means clothes, blankets and shoes are harder to get. On average with the hens we get 2 eggs a day. 1 egg sells for 25 silver, meaning the 2 we make in a day gives us 50 silver. There's 28 days in a month meaning with eggs alone we make 14 gold. Altogether in one month we usually make roughly 46 gold. As good of an amount as that is, 45 of it has to go to the king, leaving us with roughly 1 gold left. Because we're human and need to eat, bathe and clothe ourselves just like everyone else, whatever's left gets spent on stuff like that. On average every month we spend about 50 silver on food. I have my own plant pots in my room that we use for our own food. There's only 2 of them but in one plant pot I grow strawberries and in the other I grow raspberries. Truth be told if I sold the strawberries and raspberries we'd probably be richer but honestly, we're both kinda used to this life and although we don't have everything we want, we have everything we need. Besides the fruits take 2 months to grow and because of my reputation people would refuse to buy them for their actual price. They just about accept the other things, if fruits were in the mix I'd probably get death glares and 1 bronze for a batch. It doesn't bother me too much though because with whatever odd bit of wheat we had spare from the 700 odd we plant and sell we use that to make bread or pastry, so every 2 months we make the fruits into a jam or crush them and make a pie. My all time favourite activity is making them into pies or bread and jam with Isaieth. It's the only thing we can properly do together. He helps me replant and harvest the wheat sometimes because there's so much of it but usually he just watches from afar. His eye sight is getting worse the older he gets so he helps less and less. It saddens me because I know he doesn't want to go fully blind, we wouldn't be able to communicate at all and what kind of life are you living if you can't see or hear anything. You might as well be dead at that point or you'd be so throughly confused. 

Getting back on track. Today is a bad day because it's the first day where I have to pay for the rent. I've been a few times with Isaieth as a child but I've never gone alone. It's an adults job and should only be done by an adult. But today, aswell as being my birthday, it's also rent day. Isaieth didn't actually want me to do it but I insisted knowing that he would have severe trouble doing it himself. And what's more is that I have to go alone to sell our produce now aswell. I don't put any blame on him and I especially will never complain. But in my head I can feel bitter about the situation. 

I look forward to the day.....

...

No I don't. 

[dablkbox]

Did I Do That?

One thing I can admit is that I am a sucker for a sitcom with a well rounded family and some sort of quirky neighbor. If you're on the same train then you already know what show I had the pleasure of watching: Family Matters.

Family Matters premiered on September 22 1989, on ABC with the show later moving to CBS. The show starred Reginald VelJohnson as Carl Winslow, Jo Marie Paton as Harriette Winslow, Kellie Shanygne Williams as Laura Winslow, Darius McCrary as Eddie Winslow, Rosetta LeNoire as Estelle Winslow, Telma Hopkins as Rachel Crawford, Jamiee Foxworth as Judy Winslow, and Joseph and Julis Wright as Ritchie Crawford. At the beginning of the show Jaleel White was definitely capturing our funny bones as Steve Urkel but it was not until the second season he became a regular cast member. The viewers reactions to his antics and tenderness were enough to secure him a regular spot.

The show ran for 9 seasons which is an incredible run for a black sitcom. The last episode aired July 17, 1998. Family Matters is available for purchase on Amazon and also available to stream on Hulu.

I was a little hesitant to watch this show because I remember watching the reruns of this as a kid and only remember a few episodes being funny. OH DAMN WAS I WRONG! Family Matters is hilarious! The characters are quick and funny all in their own way. The show also really played with the element of physical and environmental comedy. Whether it was Steve transforming into Stephon or the The Winslow Family reacting to one of Steve’s newest machines the characters really played with what was going on around them.

Let’s start with the basics of the show; Family Matters centers around  The Winslow Family living in Chicago. The family deals with their everyday lives and with the daily and unnecessary occurrences of their neighbor Steve Urkel. One reason I was excited to watch this show is because it takes place in my hometown of Chicago. It was so interesting hearing them use actual Chicago streets, neighborhoods, and schools. It made me feel like I was really IN the story. 

One aspect of the show that I have to discuss is Carl Winslow’s job as an officer. We ALL know the traumatic history black people have in regards to the police. Things have gotten alarmingly worse and it has gotten to the point where there truly is no resolution for all the wrongs the police have done to black and brown communities. Despite all of this we also know there are people of color who are on the force. Carl Winslow was an officer of the Chicago Police Department and from what I gather it definitely feels as though this was done intentionally. This show premiered in the late 80′s and early 90′s which was a time where racial tension between black/brown communities and the police were really starting to reveal themselves. As a Chicago native I know that the 90′s was definitely when more gangs were making themselves known in the communities making police become more aggressive than they already were. During this time a figure like Carl, I feel, was a tactic to make black men who watch the show and don’t view police in a positive manner to empathize with the police by seeing someone who looks like them in the uniform. Remember this is just my theory but it does not seem too far fetched. Even though I am not  the biggest fan of Car’s occupation I appreciated how his difficulties being on the force in relation to him being a black man was displayed. There was an episode where Carl had to check one of his colleagues because he harassed his son Eddie for no reason other than the color of his skin. I appreciated the honesty toward that difficult part of his career.

During my rewatch something else that was great to watch was the show’s use of special effects. Growing up I watched many sitcoms but nothing could ever compare to the time and effort that I know were put into the special effects on the show. As Steve became more present his experiments always lead to explosions and/or some substance being shot across the room. I noticed that became an opener for some of the episodes in the later seasons and guess what...I loved every minute of it! The special effects mixed with other stunts in the show was the cherry on top of this comedic sundae. I hope the cast had insurance during the time cause certain things looked a little too daredevil-ish for me. One of my favorite moment is during the episode “High Anxiety” in season 4 when Waldo, Steve, and Eddie were trapped on a fire escape and were trying to get back inside the building. It was almost as if watching something similar to the Universal Soul circus. While the fire escape turned the actors tumbled and flipped right on top of it. I am still till this day wondering if they used stunt doubles. 

Another great part of this family sitcom are the characters themselves. I can truly say that after watching this series I enjoyed mostly everyone’s performance(minus Eddie but we’ll get to that) and watching them display the growth of these characters. One character who I deem to be one of the most underrated 90′s girls is Laura Winslow. I am sure those who listen to music have heard rappers refer to their dream girls and used sitcoms references. I have heard people wanting a Whitley Gilbert, Hilary Banks, Denise Huxtable, etc(and clearly we see what’s wrong with this pattern) but never a Laura Winslow which is amazing to me because she was such bold and charismatic character. One of my favorite episodes to see her in is “Fight The Good Fight” in season 2 where she fought to have a black history course taught in school. I know we loved Moesha but Laura paved the way. Did she make mistakes like every teenage girl yes but she knew exactly where she wanted to go and how to get there which makes Laura the blueprint!

I could not leave this post without writing just a tad about Jaleel White. I was looking forward to watching this show because I wanted to see if Steve is actually funny or was it just the expected goofiness that people knew they would get a chuckle out of. I am here to tell you that Steve Urkel is indeed HILARIOUS and that is done because of the brilliance that is Jaleel White. Jaleel was ACTING! Steve was no doubt a comedic character but there were moment in the show where his let his guard down(especially with Laura) and we saw some of the most tender and sincere moments that I have ever seen on a sitcom. The comedic moments were out of this world paired with Jaleel’s vocal and physical talents when it comes to creating Steve. The transformation moment when he turns into Stephon is almost mesmerizing to me. The way he deliberately would time it, deliver lines throughout the process, and even the sound effects he’s making. I know it sounds a little goofy but, this an actor who you can tell does not ming playing on a set. Jaleel now does work more in the children’s entertainment world which is a great thing. I am all for a children programming including images and voices(I know he’s done some voice over work) that include black people but I would love to see him cross over onto something very dark comedy-ish. American Horror Story? 

The cast overall is superb and went very well together and had many characters that are enjoyable on screen, like Ms. Estelle(played by Rosetta LeNoire). I always and I mean ALWAYS love a strong matriarchal figure who emphasizes in a very loving but direct way that: I AM GROWN. Estelle spoke her mind but was always there to bring her family together. It is probably the southern in me but it just hits every time.

NOW! As I stated in my opening post not only will I be going over the good but it just wouldn’t be right to acknowledge the bad in some of these shows, or the thing that were less favorable. 

Something I noted it what’s similar to what happened with “JJ” from Good Times. Steve was always his brilliant self but there were times where the antics may have been just a filler instead using the comedic moment to fuel the story. It was not to the extreme of how the character of J.J was in a sense “dumbed down” but there were moments I felt okay that little goofy thing didn't necessarily need to happen but it’s fine.

Someone that bugged me throughout this entire series is Eddie Winslow. I mean..he literally only thinks with one head and it gets very irritating after a while. I get it we were all there once teenagers but damn! THINK! I have a complex with straight men who think and act “traditionally” so fair warning that characters like Eddie Winslow in other shows will get the same treatment. Not to mention I am just not convinced with any of Darius McCrary’s performances. Even when he is a special guest star or the lead actor he just always has been a miss for me. Everyone on the cast held their own but I’ve always felt like he was the weakest link.

Overall Family Matters was an amazing display of quality Black television if you ask me. Great comedic scenes/elements, very heartfelt moments, and aired episodes that talked about some important issues such as bullying, gang violence, and even body image. The show gave us great characters; Steve Urkel will ALWAYS be a pop culture icon. I urge you to watch Family Matters again and enjoy everything this quirky and compassionate sitcom has to offer.

Favorite Episodes:

S2, EP 18-Life of the Party

S2, EP 20-The Good Fight

S2, EP 25-I Should’ve Done Something

S3, EP 9-Born To Be Mild

S3, EP 16-Brown Bombshell

S4, EP 13-Muskrat Love

S4, EP 18- Higher Anxiety

S5, EP 8-Dr. Urkel and Mr. Cool

S5, EP 10-All The Wrong Movies

S7, EP 14, Life in the Fast Lane 

S7, EP 20-Twinkle Toes Faldo

S8, EP 7-Stevil

[karereiko]

Pointless Zestiria X post (you can skip it) Talk about sormik, other canons and silly dreams

You know I had dream tonight about last episode of anime. It's coming close so idea of going through sea of salt once more  (after almost month of curing my wounded soul) started to stress out my brain once more. Not mention reading yesterday post about salty comment about possible Sorali ending.

I don't think that it's a case. It would be like Namco shooting themselves into heads. They already posted article in „Romance” newspaper in japan featuring Sorey and Mikleo. They probably see that posts saying about sormik on unfotable tweeter have more like 600+ favs when normal Zestiria X and Alisha things have like 50-/+. They wouldn't bring the wave of hate on themselves if they are sane.

Yet, I'm not looking forward to read about last episode of anime.

So, back to my dream. I dream story for last episode of anime where Ufotable made Heldalf disappear in first seconds of episode like Smaug dies in first 10 minutes of 3rd Hobbit. So after that Sorey is possessed by new bad guy jumping from nowhere. Team fights him and after beating Sorey to the ground team doesn't know how to return Sorey back to normal. Then Mikleo leaned down to kiss him. Camera doesn't show it clearly but you know Mikleo is kissing Sorey (as to not cross line to showing their lips together in anime, airing in japan since they aren't open to things like that).

Sorey is returned to normal. There is skip after all that to inn room where Sorey and Mikleo is talking about last battle and what to do next. Mikleo is still shaken by last battle and fact someone possessed Sorey. They sitting around 15 centimeters away from each other but Sorey rises his arm above Mikleo's shoulder and says sorry for worrying him and giving him his support ( whole anime didn't do even single scene like this, when Sorey is grateful for Mikleo's feelings, like he was in game and seeing this made me really happy in my dream). Anyway Mikleo is moved and he falls with his head on Sorey's lap and cries.

There is where my dream ended and I was sad that it wasn't real. It was damn stupid, it was cliche, it was cheesy, it was silly for Mikleo to act like this. And yet I can feel that real last episode of anime is going to be worst than this. Worst than silly dream just like rest of episodes were.

I'm not saying that Sorey and Mikleo romance was perfect in game. If you watch scenes and skits clearly you can see how much they take care of each other. We have famous Sauna skit. But they aren't labeled as romance and that's Sormik main problem. Namco made them always stood beside each other but always with some space between them. Many scenes just scream that this is the right moment for them to hold hands or just put hand on other's shoulder. I'm not talking about kissing, none tales story had it, but since one putting of Mikleo's hand on Sorey's shoulder we didn't get anything like this later. I read somewhere that while making game they have „toned down” their relationship, yet I don’t know if that's true/real. I didn't saw note talking about it myself. The other question if it's real is what they „toned down”? Did Sorey and Mikleo hugged? Did they held hands on some point? We will never know.

We have words of „One and only” but that all we got and it would never let some people stop screaming that Sormik isn't canon. We have „unfinished” confession from Mikleo. Because I think it's main problem that made anime look like this. That made sormik fandom die faster than you can say Xenosaga.

There is no clear announcement that Sormik was suppose to be canon. Not in game. Not in anime. The words of „one and only” aren't enough for some people. No amount of explain behind Alisha leaving party, Mikleo being Sorey's one and only, that Sorey and any girl would work out going to change people minds.

I don't think fans who support Sormik need any more prof of them being canon. It would be nice but not necessary. We want it so others could stop hurt Mikleo, so both Sorey and Mikleo could be happy and other characters could be themselves.

When I thought about romances in tales games, and yes I played them for 10 years right now, many romances weren't greatly done. But since it's boyxgirl it's easier to find simple looking in eyes with affection, grab hands or supporting each other as romance affection.

Sormik as it is now it's hard to clearly label as romantic for everyone. Some may think it more or less or just simply brothers relationship.

Let's look at other Tales games. At beginning I want to say that I support those couples too just like Sormik.

I think most unclear romance is YurixEstelle. After watching gameplay I asked myself question, was that love? Or simply friendship? Really, compare to those two Sormik is already romance. Someone can say but Yuri tried save Estelle so many times! They had alone talk with each other before final battle.

Sorey and Mikleo had moments alike this a lot with other ones and I don't think Yuri even once said Estelle looks sexy after sauna. If YurixEstelle are canon then Sormik too in Tales of games style.

LloydxCollete was nice done, we clearly see Lloyd care for Collette and it's not only because she's his childhood friend. Symphonia anime, also made by Ufotable was heaven compare to Zestiria. It followed main plot, didn't change characters personalities and the most important thing, it cherished LloydxCollette canon. So don't get me wrong over hating Zestiria X. I wanted simply repeat from Symphonia, to see Zestiria story/moments as anime and I got something that trashed plot and characters.

Xillia, as much as it's clear that canon pair is JudexMilla they doesn't touch or kiss to feel that they are canon. They only hold hands at the end before... they simply parting ways. I remember loving those two, Jude's love for Milla was so sweet and ending broke me. I never played Xillia 2 because I was afraid it would ruin my beloved canon. Did someone said that Milla didn't start to romantically care for Jude, or Jude for Milla? No. Even the reality when he was human (ehem Sorey) and she spirit (ehem Mikleo) didn't make canon less possible. Milla may over live Jude, but that's another story.

From all clearly romance canon couples from Tales games I can say are: ShingxKohaku (he clearly says in game at least twice that he loves Kohaku), KylexReala (this whole game goes around their romance and later when Reala's going to disappear Kyle don't want for that to happen. They hug a lot too.

Tales of games have a lot cuples that comes from childhood friends: ReidxFarah, VeiguexClaire, LloydxCollette, AsbelxCheria, SenelxShirley (if in the end they are canon... Well, their relationship is complicated too, first Senel loves Shirley's sister, but she died, then some people ship him hard with Chloe (ehem... she tried to kill him)) and SoreyxMikleo are just as another one of those couples.

So, to end this post, anime isn't going to help Sormik matter, it made it only worse. I don't think we ever get side story in any crossover game that would say „Sormik are romantic canon.” There is no way, even other canon couples rarely get their relationship on romance level in those games (usually they are at beginning level when they just know each other for some time example: LukexTear, LloydxCollette are mostly childhood friends usualy). We won't be able to hear anything beyond „Sorey wants to spend rest of his life with his CHILDHOOD friend Mikleo” (Asteria's radio audition) or Sorey knew Mikleo's true name but oh well they are boys, it doesn't mean Mikleo told it as romantic confession (Berseria, Berseria guide that says it's different when boy telling another boy his true name). Even Zelos joking about Sorey and Mikleo being on date (Asteria) isn’t going to help everyone view Sormik as canon or let tell sormik supporters that we have nothing to worry about and just enjoy canonical Sormik.         

First episodes of anime gave hope about Sormik being something even more big than in game, but it was quickly destroyed. It was treated even worse from episode to episode. What comes from Ufotable sketch of Sorey and Mikleo sleeping on eachother shoulder, close and happy if it wasn’t in anime?

As for myself I'm sad about anime waste as whole Zestiria, not only Sormik. I don't care how Zestiria X looks like, I don't need to watch it. But each time I think that we never going to get because of Zestiria X a GOOD adaptation of game like Abyss or Symphonia had (gosh, even eternia was better, at least characters wasn't so ooc even if it plot was awful, graphic too, but it was in the end only filler to main story. No one tried to change main plot). Chances for reboot of anime is 0%. That's it. We never see tickle fight, fake marriage scene, Sorey losing his resonance, Rose hitting him, Dezel death (no, no kamikaze kill without real reason), fight with Tiamat, night at Lastonbell, EVERYONE seeing Sorey and Mikleo's past, the ending of story... The only nice scene from game we got was Sorey holding his breath to let Alisha communicate with Lailah. That's all.  

I love Zestiria OVA. It has perfect pacing and it was close as possible to game. I just simply wish we got something like this instead of Zestiria X.