Unfortunately, I thought of a real plot
Can I Have This Dance? (new title)
There’s drama in the Batfam, with a song about dancing somehow worked into each chapter. Something is wrong again, and the family is falling apart. Now, they have to put the pieces back together. But the thing about puzzles is you can only figure out the full picture by coming together.
Chp. 2 We don’t have to dance
The phone was ringing.
Tim was awake, of course. The pale yellow dawn had begun to creep into the apartment, the cozy glow illuminating last night’s exploits. Twin controllers on the floor. Styrofoam takeout boxes that should be in the trash, not on his already messy table. And, his favorite part, his brothers snuggled together on his couch.
He had been perfectly happy to take the chair.
Tim looked at the caller ID. Bruce. His fingers found the power button, sending it to voicemail.
It was the first call since he carried Damian hyperventilating out of the gala seven hours earlier.
If he cares so much about where Damian is, Tim thought bitterly, let him figure it out. Use those big boy detective skills.
Tim turned back to his laptop screen, where he had been editing his report on the recent Teen Titan mission. The past few weeks or so had been a blur. The team foiled a plot to blow up half of São Paulo, culminating in a chase by air which Tim, as a non-super, had probably no business participating in, but inserting himself where he had no business was pretty much his mode of operation. Then, with that finished and the criminals entering international custody, Tim had been planning on a night of video games and report writing when he got the call from Dick.
Tim glanced at the couch and realized he probably would never quite get used to this sight. He spent about an hour staring between the hours of 3 and 4 alone. Curse Dick and his bleeding heart, his was getting infected, too. It was just so cute.
Jason was lying on his back, one arm behind his head, the other hooked all the way around Damian’s little body. His eyebrows were knit together, so he looked concerned and vaguely grumpy- a sleep softened version of Red Hood’s ‘don’t even try it’ look. He was protecting precious cargo.
Damian had wiggled his face into the skin of Jason’s neck and chest, his mouth just open, face completely relaxed in the deep sleep of an exhausted child. An extended panic attack will do that to you, Tim thought. Jason’s hand rested on the skin of the pushed out belly peeking out of his t-shirt. The kid always seemed to gravitate towards skin-to-skin contact, as if he was finally going through the infant stages of emotional development. Which was entirely possible, considering they were the first people he was truly safe around. The thought twisted in Tim’s gut. Convincing Damian the league’s actions were wrong was about as difficult as convincing him they would never be like them: slow going but definitely rewarding. Tim could barely believe there was a time he would have punted the kid out an open window if given the chance. He felt a bit guilty, but he knew they had both changed since then.
Damian was completely pressed up against Jason, but his feet barely reached his mid-thigh. Even though Jason was a big guy, the size comparison was still nothing short of completely adorable, and Dick, Duke, and the girls had been sent multiple pictures already. The baby curls of his soft, short hair poofed up like they did every morning before he tried to gel them into spikes. One hand twisted into the front of Jason’s shirt.
The weighted Robin-themed blanket had fallen off the couch in the middle of the night, and Tim slipped it back up to his brothers’ shoulders gently on his way to the kitchen.
Coffee was the order of the morning. He’d make a pot: four cups for him, one for Jason. If he had to deal with Bruce, he wanted to do it with some semblance of control.
By the time he walked back into the room, Jason was awake, staring at the ceiling as he ran his hand up-down along Damian’s spine.
“Morning,” Tim whispered, sitting next to him in the chair.
“Nerd,” Jason scoffed, smirking.
He choked and spit out his coffee. “Dude!”
“What? You sound like an old man.”
“Why did I let you stay at my place, again?”
“It’s because you love me.”
“I’d love to hit you.”
Jason was entirely too satisfied. “Can’t hit me when I’m holding a baby.”
Tim scowled into his cup. He couldn’t argue, though. Last night, they realized they didn’t have any of Damian’s clothes at the apartment, so Jason gave him an old t-shirt and Tim got him a pair of boxers with ties around the waist. The t shirt alone went to his knees.
He was tiny.
The phone started buzzing again.
“Tell me it’s not-“
“I wish I could.” He declined the call.
Jason shifted up, swearing.
“Hey! Be-“
“He’s sound asleep,” he grumbled, arranging the kid so he was leaning against his chest, blanket curled around him. “Look at this sleepy burrito boy.”
They gazed softly as Damian sucked in a shaky breath, whined, and cuddled in further, gripping Jason’s shirt tighter.
The phone buzzed.
“Mother- Does he not get that we’re ignoring him?”
Tim hit decline call. “He will eventually.”
Damian’s feet twitched, and Jason held him just a bit tighter, one hand at the base of his neck, the other smoothing a circle into his back. His lips and brows ran in parallel lines across his worried face.
“I don’t think he’s going to wake up any time soon,” Tim said, noting the brood session.
Jason grumbled.
“I’m going to text the girls, tell them to postpone their plans.”
“Mm.”
“Let’s do the zoo trip tomorrow. It looks like Damian is wiped out.”
“Mm.”
“Take today to deal with Bruce.”
“Mm.”
“Give zombie boy here time to develop organized speech.”
“M- wait,” Jason broke out of his thousand yard stare. “What did you say you little crap stain?”
Tim cackled, but held the phone steady.
“Do not send that snap, Tim, I swear I’m gonna-“
“Can’t hit me when you’re holding the baby,” Tim sang, scooting backwards, already hitting the contacts for Steph and Cass.
Jason swore.
…
They laid around the apartment for a few more hours, Tim working on his laptop and Jason reading The Outsiders while Damian slept. Jason kept a shelf of old novels at Tim’s place; it wasn’t uncommon for one to spend the night at the other’s. They kept an eye on each other like that, knowing too much time alone tended to do more harm than good.
The silence itself wasn’t uncomfortable, but Tim could have used a distraction from his own thoughts.
This was a big deal. He and Jason were trying to downplay it, keep it together for the kid, but they knew.
They were essentially disowning their dad.
And it wasn’t like this was a sudden decision either, it had been something on the horizon for months, a serious topic of discussion among the older kids for three weeks now. These past few days may have forced their hand, but the hurt was still the same.
Bruce had never been the ideal parent. He was gruff, he usually didn’t have the words, and he literally had a t-shirt that said “Emotions are my enemy”. But he had loved them. At least, Tim hoped. He had made Bruce his life, let his business become his work, held his mission in his hands like a guiding light. He had been so lonely, left neglected in an old, empty house. Bruce got him out, introduced him to a world that never stopped expanding, and gave him access to the tools he needed to change it.
But lately, Bruce seemed… different. Tim thought when he brought him back, everything would be okay. Everything would be understandable and solid again. Tim had felt so sad and confused without his dad. His grief was overwhelming. But Bruce came back, and Tim was so glad, he was sure that would fix it.
Instead, he was even more confused. His dad was unrecognizable in and out of the cowl. Bruce yelled at him over everything, cut off communication and left. Batman… Batman hit him. Tim touched his jaw, trying to control his anxiety.
Dick had found something, videos deleted off the bat computer. He hadn’t recovered all of it, but what he found was evidence enough. Tim wasn’t the only one Batman was getting more violent with.
There were three videos. The Batman beating thugs within an inch of their life. Screaming at Robin. In one, right after throwing a man off the roof, Batman turned with his armed raised and Robin flinched so hard he fell over.
That was bad enough. But there was missing information, hours of footage gone. And that scared them even more. Tim couldn’t stop his mind from running through every single possibility. He could never shut it off.
A stomach growled, and Tim looked up to his brother trying to flip the page with his nose.
Finally, an external stimulus.
“If you’re hungry, Jason, I can get you something to eat.”
Jason scoffed, finding his nose a bit too large to be useful. “What do you have, pickles and mustard?”
“Ha, ha,” Tim closed his laptop. “You only get the mayonnaise now.”
“Good thing that wasn’t my stomach.”
Another gurgle, and Damian’s face scrunched up.
Tim paused on his way to the fridge and blinked for a minute, not sure if they should let him sleep or wake him up, but by the time he made a decision, the kid’s eyelashes fluttered apart on their own.
His green eyes crossed and uncrossed in narrow slits. When they focused, they found Jason’s chin, and he scrambled to sit up.
“Woah there, squirt,” Jason tugged him back down, going back to rubbing his back. Damian grumbled and frowned, but let his head fall back down.
“Just take a minute, remember where you are and all that fun stuff.”
Tim cleared some room to sit, moving aside paperwork on the table next to the couch.
Damian’s face twisted for a beat before he pushed himself up again with a huff. Tim had to hand it to him for not immediately falling down.
“Alright, Todd. I remember now. Unhand me and I’ll return to Father’s soon.”
“Ha! Nope.” Jason sat up and yanked him onto his lap.
Damian scowled and threw his head back dramatically.
“Do not suffer me this injustice, Todd.”
Tim smirked. Damian was very clearly not yet awake, what with the slightly unfocused eyes and leaning into Jason’s chest. “Suffer”, he said.
“Sorry, baby bat. You’re not going back to the manor.”
That seemed to wake him up more. He jerked around to look at Jason’s nose, then his eyes.
“What?”
“You’re not going back to the manor.”
“Oh,” he said, a blank look on his face. “I am staying here today?”
“Mm.”
“Zombie boy.”
“Shut UP, Tim!”
Tim laughed. Damian still hadn’t gotten off Jason’s lap, hadn’t leaned away from the hand on his back.
“Is Father away again?” He asked instead, clearly confused. Tim would bet his last jar of peanut butter that Damian was still fuzzy on why exactly he woke up on Jason in this apartment.
“Something like that.”
“Father has left me home many times, Todd. Pennyworth is usually around, unless he is with Father.”
Jason didn’t react, but looked at Tim over the kid’s head.
“What do you mean by that?”
Damian fiddled with the blanket, pinching it up and poking it back down.
“It’s just that, he is busy. He’s home when he can be.”
Tim didn’t like the sound of that. He didn’t like the sound of his voice, the hollow loneliness. He suddenly felt pissed.
“Damian,” Tim said evenly. “When was the last time you talked to Bruce.”
“Batman and I-“
Jason tapped his nose, and he crossed his eyes to follow it. “No, Damian. Just Bruce.”
Damian looked at one brother, then the other. They could see the way he was reaching back in his still foggy memory, trying to figure out the answer they wanted to hear.
“No bullshit, kid,” Jason warned.
Damian looked to the side, schooled his face into a blank expression, and looked Tim in the eyes.
“It has been a while. Father is often… upset with Robin.”
Jason rubbed his back again.
“Alright,” Tim said. He was going to kill Bruce. “You’re staying with me this week, anyways.”
“What?”
“You,” Tim shifted to poke Damian’s nose. His eyes crossed, and Jason grinned. “You are gonna stay with me.”
“For an entire week?”
“Yup.”
“And I am not going back to Father’s?”
“Nope.”
“I… do not have clothes.”
“I grabbed a bag when I visited yesterday.”
“You probably missed-“
“Alfred packed it.”
“Oh,” he blinked, glancing back and forth at them. “And Todd?”
“Does what he wants, thank you,” Jason tickled his side. Damian swatted at his face, falling off his lap. Tim caught him by the armpits and helped him back on the couch.
“Don’t make him hit his head. I really don’t want to make an ER visit outside the mask.”
Jason rolled his eyes, then turned, trapping Damian with his legs.
“Get off me, you massive troll!”
“Just when I thought you loved me.”
“Careful, Jason, he’s hangry, remember?”
“I am not!” Damian’s stomach protested the statement, and he looked down betrayed.
Laughing hard enough to rock forward, Tim hit his head on Jason’s knee.
“Now who needs an ER visit?”
“Ugh, you two are the worst.”
“We did not cause you to become an uncoordinated hyena.”
“Harsh words from a chipmunk.”
“Hey!”
“Children, please,” Jason smiled. “We have to feed the wildlife. It pisses off the government.”
Tim stared at Jason for a good long while.
“Okay, I’m not gonna… Who wants breakfast?”
Jason made to stand up, but fell back on Damian, who yelped before being squashed.
“Todd! What are you-“
“Damian,” he whined. “I am so hurt. You called this weirdo over here Timothy last night. Timothy!”
“What?!”
“And you only call me Todd.”
“Get off-“
“Not until you call me Jason!” He met Tim’s incredulous look and raised his eyebrows convincingly.
“Todd, I will stab your kidneys.”
“Will you call me Jason after?”
“Not likely.”
“Boo!”
Damian began to squirm, but Jason leaned more of his weight on him and he growled in frustration.
Tim sighed and dragged a hand down his face. “Jason, it’s too early for-“
“Shush.”
“No,” Damian grunted. “Listen to Timothy!”
Jason leaned his face directly into his field of vision. “Bruh.”
“No.”
“Jason”
“No.”
“Jay?”
“No.”
“Big Jay?”
“Absolutely not.”
“Come on, Dames,” he whined. “I wanna be your favorite.”
“That’s Richard,” he smirked.
Jason grinned at Tim, who started to back away waving his hands.
“Oh, no. I don’t want any part in this, whatever this is.”
The wicked look in Jason’s eye grew worse. He flipped off the kid, just to jab his fingers into his armpit.
Damian immediately began to thrash.
“No!” He kicked the man’s stomach. “Stop!”
“Call me Jason!”
“No,” he choked, “never!”
“I can do this all day, kid!”
Damian fell off the couch, and Jason trapped him between his knees on the floor. He would have hit him again if his arms weren’t trying to protect himself from the attack.
“You have,” he gasped, “no-“ a squeal. “Mercy!”
Jason laughed then. “All you gotta do is say my name!”
“Todd!”
“Nope,” Jason moved on to his belly.
“No!” He giggled, “Stop, I!”
Jason made a goofy face and tickled harder.
“Jason!” He gasped, belly laughing.“ Jason, I yield!”
Jason opened his legs, and he shot out, scrambling onto the arm of the couch.
Jason whooped and held up his arms in victory.
Damian glared at Tim.
“Traitor,” he grumbled.
Tim laughed and held up three spoons and a jar of peanut butter.
“If you losers are done, I have peanut butter and pretzels for breakfast.”
“It’s nearly noon.”
“And we are breaking the fast. Ergo breakfast.”
“Fine,” Damian flopped onto the cushions, hiding his smile. “I will extract my vengeance at a later time for this injustice.”
“Oh, Timmy, the chipmunk just chirped at me!”
“Aw, Jay Jay, he’s so cute!”
“I can kill you eight different ways with that spoon.”
“Do you want us to feed you? With the choo choo train?”
Jason caught the pillow before it hit his face.
“I can and will use lethal force, Todd!”
“Jason.”
“Jason Todd.”
“Baby steps,” he chuckled.
Tim smiled as he scooped his own portion of peanut butter. The sirens in his head were easier to ignore. He watched Jason wiggle his fingers menacingly, then take a pillow to the face
He plopped the bag of pretzels on the table, inserting himself between the two. “Eat your shut up peanut butter.”
Jason stuck out his tongue, but grabbed a spoon.
“And after this, we’re cleaning my apartment.”
Jason looked horrified.
Tim felt no remorse. “If you guys are going to be staying here, we need to clean it. I’ve barely been here the last two months, and I do not trust my own cleanliness.”
Damian raised his eyebrow, “If the pizza under your bed has gained sentience again, I am not touching it.”
“Eat,” Tim glared, “your shut up pretzels, veggie boy.”
“Gladly.”
…
Damian stood and joined his hands together behind his back in a fair imitation of Alfred, if Alfred wore a Gotham Knight’s muumuu.
“I shall put on music, so that the arduous task of tidying this hovel is mildly less gruesome.”
“If you think,” Jason closed one eye and pointed his spoon, “that I’m gonna let you put on a classical music playlist, you are crazier than a bag full of cats.”
“A bag of cats sounds quite enjoyable, actually.”
“Metaphor, Dames.”
“I am aware.”
“And it means?”
“… I am very crazy?”
Jason held up his hand, and Damian returned the high five.
“Alright, ladies. Cleaning time.” Tim stood and took the spoons on his way to the kitchen.
Jason made a show of selecting his playlist titled ‘I Wanna Commit A Crime’ (we’re vigilantes Tim, it’s in our job description). Apparently, emo rock music was the ideal cleaning soundtrack.
Tim laughed at Damian’s concerned frown over Jason’s head banging as he washed the dishes.
He was just finishing up when Jason came in, crossing his arms and leaning against the wall.
“If you have time to lean, you have time to clean,” he grinned.
He turned around, planning on flicking water at him, but stopped at the serious look on Jason’s face.
“What’s wrong?”
“Do you want a list?”
“Jason, don’t do this to me. I have anxiety.”
Jason shrugged, chewing on the inside of his lip.
“I just want to make sure you’re doing okay with all this.”
Tim really didn’t want to deal with this conversation yet. He didn’t want to deal with any conversation.
“I’m fine.”
Jason’s brows became a shelf again. He scuffed his foot.
“You keep doing the finger thing.”
“The finger thing.”
“You know,” Jason huffed. “The thing you do when you twitch your fingers and start tapping out random- I don’t know how to use words, okay? English wasn’t my first language, you butt. Just- You’re upset.”
Tim leaned against the sink. “I mean, I think we all are.”
An ambulance passed by the window, and they watched the lights pass by several floors below.
“I’m glad you came by,” Tim finally said. “You really helped Damian last night.”
Jason pushed off the wall and pulled him into a one armed hug. “I came for you both, you know.”
Tim closed his eyes, leaning his head against his brother’s shoulder. The buzz in his chest felt a little less overwhelming.
A car honked, and a thud came from the other room. Muffled complaining followed. Jason laughed, ruffling Tim’s hair as he made his way to the door.
No rest for the weary, Tim smiled and tied off the garbage. It was starting to really smell.
“Be right back!” He yelled as he stepped out the door, locking it behind him.
He did feel better, knowing that Jason was there. Once Dick came, they could really talk everything over, and Tim would relax then. But he was content at the moment. He would just ignore it for now. He was content. It was fine. It was-
He sent the bag down the chute.
Actually, this whole situation was garbage.
Who did Bruce think he was? When did he ever become the type to hit his own kids? It was wrong, it was so wrong. Red Robin wanted to punch him in the face, especially when he heard him over the comms from countries away scolding Damian for things he told him to do.
And he didn’t care what was going to happen. He didn’t care if he got screamed at, or fired, or- or- he didn’t know! He didn’t care! Tim was not giving Damian back to anyone. Bruce didn’t deserve that kid. He was stubborn sometimes, and prickly, but he didn’t deserve to be treated like that. He had been through more than any of them knew, and he needed someone that loved him unconditionally. Bruce wasn’t that. Bruce was acting like a huge jerk-
He slammed open the door to his floor to be confronted with a man’s back, hand raised to knock.
Speak of the damned devil.
“What do you want,” Tim spat.
Calm down.
He clenched his jaw, because as much as he wanted to fly off the handle, that would probably make things worse.
Bruce turned around slowly. He looked him up and down before putting his hands in his pockets. His smile was easy and so Brucie stupid.
Tim wanted to hit him back.
“You took Damian home last night.”
“Yep.”
“I came to take him home.”
“Yeah,” Tim glared. “No.”
Bruce quirked one brow. He let the silence hang for a beat.
His thumb tapped frantically against his fist. If he doesn’t leave, I am going to do something I’m gonna regret.
“You’re angry.”
“Great job, detective.”
“That’s… fair.”
Bruce shrugged, still smug and unaffected. Tim just glared. He didn’t want to do this.
“I’m-“
“You should go, Bruce.”
Surprise flashed briefly through his eyes before it was replaced by annoyance.
“Look, Tim, you know how Damian gets-“
“Kay.”
“I’m just here to-”
“Nope.”
An exhale.
“I’m just here to take him back home and talk to him.”
“Oh,” the cold in his tone hurt him as he spoke, but it was too late to stop. “Now you’re going to talk to your own kid?”
Bruce stared. Tim stepped forward, the picture of casual.
“Not last night. Not last week apparently. Maybe all month. You’ve been too busy to deal with your own kid, but you’re ready now.”
“Tim, I-“
“No, just shut up, actually. How long did it take you to realize he wasn’t even in the same building as you anymore? Did you even care?”
“Of course I-“
“Shut- Ugh! I’m not doing this for you, B. This wasn’t a babysitting job. I don’t care what you think. You’re not taking Damian back. Me and Dick and the rest of them talked it over. You don’t deserve that kid.”
The flip switched, and Bruce was angry. His shirt pulled tight across his shoulders.
Tim widened his stance.
“And you do, of course.”
“I care about him more than you do.”
“I do care!”
“Could have fooled me!”
Bruce was tense from his shoulder to his fist. Tim belatedly notice he had gotten in his face.
“You don’t-“
Tim threw up his hands and walked past. “Have to talk to you.”
“What? Listen-“
“I don’t have to talk to you. I’m keeping the kid, so-“
Bruce grabbed his shoulder hard, “Actually, Timothy, I have custody, so-“
Huh. Tim turned and smiled, cold and clinical. Just like Janet, they liked to say. Bruce looked unnerved for one satisfying moment and dropped his hand.
Tim stepped close, his nose inches from Bruce’s chin, devastatingly sharp.
“But you don’t, actually.”
“What the hell are you-”
“You supposedly died, remember?” Tim rolled his eyes. “Everyone thought so. Did you think we could just leave Damian in the custody of a dead man?”
“But I-“
“Came back, obviously. But we didn’t change the paperwork. Just in case.”
Bruce looked wonderfully, furiously constipated.
Tim turned his back on him and slowly pulled his keys from his pocket. “So, no, I don’t have to do this with you. You’ve changed, Bruce. And who you are now, you don’t belong raising a kid as emotionally fragile as Damian. I don’t have to pretend to be okay with it, and I don’t even have to like you. Because you have no right to be here.”
“I am his father, Tim.”
“And sometimes fathers are neglectful and abusive.”
The space behind him stayed silent. Bruce didn’t even move. Tim flicked through the key ring.
“And as far as the state and the press is concerned, Damian is adopted. Showed up at age 10, clearly not white. You had adoption papers filed, Bruce.”
“Tim, you can’t be-“
“I am, and you should go.”
“Tim-“
“It’s been so nice to see you Bruce. Let’s not talk again soon.”
Bruce stood a moment longer before turning sharply and storming down the hall. The doors slammed shut, but Tim stood there gripping the keys and shaking. He wanted to scream.
He breathed in deeply through his nose, feeling the cool air travel into his nostrils, down his throat, past his vocal cords, trachea, bronchi, bronchioles, and down to his alveoli. Left lung, right lung, into the blood stream the oxygen diffuses. He thought of Jason tickling Damian, and the kid calling him Timothy as he held him against his chest. He breathed out the waste.
He looked down at his shaking hands, where his grip on the keys drew blood, and wiped them on his pants before turning the lock and opening the door to-
“Timothy!” Damian ran forward, “Timothy you love this song!”
Tim really looked at him, the way his hair stuck up in three different places, the dust streak on his cheek. His eyes danced just like they always did when he was trying so hard to make one of them happy. His hands were out to the side, and that grin. He really was Timothy now. Huh.
He was worth it. This kid was worth it.
Jason danced out of the bathroom just as the chorus hit, singing loudly and mildly off key.
We don’t have to talk
We don’t have to dance
Damian grabbed his arm, dragging away from Jason.
We don’t have to smile
We don’t have to make friends
Jason chased them, sing-screaming along.
It’s so nice to meet you,
Let’s never meet again!
We don’t have to talk
We don’t have to dance!
We don’t have to dance
The song was at least an understandable statement, Tim thought. It was kind of a dance, or a stand off. He knew as soon as he took Dick’s side that he was cutting the last of the ties between him and the man who adopted him.
He was fatherless again.
He watched as Jason tried to get Damian to do the Macarena, only to get a towel to the butt.
He would make it through this.
Jason chased Damian around the kitchen, insisting he try the snorkel, the shopping cart, no the sprinkler!
Tim laughed, even knowing all that he did. That his nighttime gig would definitely change, that he would have to quit his day job.
It will be okay, he thought, when Damian rolled his eyes and tisked at Jason long enough for him to be swung over his shoulders as he jumped around the kitchen.
It might be better than okay, he thought as he opened up his laptop to hit send on one more application, which he had written as Damian slept.
Jason called for help, and Tim let the tension leave his body, exhaled it out in one breath, and joined them. He grabbed Damian from Jason’s arms and was spinning him around the living room by the next chorus.
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1. selfie
I’m lazy go to my instagram and like one of the selfies I posted recently lol and if you’re not- follow me there too :D
2. what would you name your future kids?
don’t want kids
3. do you miss anyone?
plenty of them yeah
4. what are you looking forward to?
hmm twitchcon this year :D finally get to go
5. is there anyone who can always make you smile?
all of my friends ^.^ they’re quite good at it in their own unique ways
6. is it hard for you to get over someone?
yes and no
yes emotionally but no mentally, once I close the door- it’s closed, the emotional linger things are what take a while
7. what was your life like last year?
uhhh not good not bad it was life-y
8. have you ever cried because you were so annoyed?
yuuuuuup
9. who did you last see in person?
my sister- she just went out XD
10. are you good at hiding your feelings?
uhhhhh I SAY yes....my friends say I’m shit at it soo maybe?
11. are you listening to music right now?
sii
Halcyon- On and On
12. what is something you want right now?
star wars episode 8....twitch con....a puppy
13. how do you feel right now?
alright, can’t complain yet
14. when was the last time someone of the opposite sex hugged you?
uhhhh....*thinks*...uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh I think...last august....unless Eden hugged me after that, but I dunno did Kyo or Eden hug me before leaving on Election night, I forget
15. personality description
Ambitious...very ambitious, driven but easily distracted, oblivious to a lot of things but perceptive to some stuff. tries to be calm and relaxed more than not but winds up stressed and cluttered minded. I think...dunno ask my friends lol
16. have you ever wanted to tell someone something but you didn’t?
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhaahah
17. opinion on insecurities.
they suck...like they ruin great things bout people cause people have all his greatness in them but the insecurities make it hard for them to even live
18. do you miss how things were a year ago?
nothing much has CHANGED sooo
19. have you ever been to New York?
I have
20. what is your favourite song at the moment?
uhhh just a little faster by there for tomorrow
21. age and birthday?
26, 2/20
22. description of crush.
moving on
23. fear(s)
abandonment/replacement
sensory deprivation
whatever lurks in the DEEP fucking ocean
die hard conservatives
24. height
5′7ish
25. role model
mm I used to always say some streamers and fictional characters but recently I’ve noticed I still look up to them but don’t wanna be them, I just borrow bits of them I like, I am trying to be my own role model now that I’m older
26. idol(s)
see above
27. things i hate
stress, having to work to survive- hey no one likes it I’m admitting that personally hate it, my depression/anxiety, most food lol
28. i’ll love you if…
see if I tell people that they’ll abuse that information, best learn one on one not giving EVERYTHING away that’ll be kryptonite
(but a sneak answer- snickerdoodles- I love those things)
29. favourite film(s)
star wars
30. favourite tv show(s)
futurama
simpsons
arrow
flash
legends of tomorrow
supergirl
star wars rebels
brooklyn 99
31. 3 random facts
I have six tattoos want tons more
still wear my class ring
picky as fuck eater
32. are your friends mainly girls or guys?
I think the MAJORITY is still girl, quite a few are guys now, some are non binary/gender neutral so I’d say it’s balanced out
33. something you want to learn
probably everything to some degree
34. most embarrassing moment
goooood question, probably when I got my first kiss, my mom brought me, her, and our friends home from swimming at the local Y, well I walked her to the door, she actually PICKED ME UP kissed me like not cute kiss but like yeah and put me back down before going inside, my mom/friends gave me shit the whole ride home....I was redder than my hair I think
35. favourite subject
history/literature probably
36. 3 dreams you want to fulfill?
see all 3 books of mine published
become a partnered streamer with a community I am proud of
own a puppy and cat in my own place on the west coast
37. favourite actor/actress
uhhh carrie fisher right now
38. favourite comedian(s)
colbert
39. favourite sport(s)
soccah
40. favourite memory
hmmm I still remember watching star wars (the original one) for the first time in my living room when I was like 6, I was like SOOOOOO into the movie and during the trench run I was like running back and forth on the couch asking my mom and step dad if Luke was gonna make it, was the Empire gonna win, I was HELLA invested....and that started my obsession
41. relationship status
single pringle
42. favourite book(s)
grisha trilogy, percy jackson books, harry potter, any of the Star Wars EU (legends and canon)
43. favourite song ever
I’m still here- from treasure planet
44. age you get mistaken for
apparently early/mid twenties? when I shave though like CLEAN shaven probably 16-18
45. how you found out about your idol
yeah see question bout idols lol
last idols I had were twitch streamers who my brother showed me when they were on YT
46. what my last text message says
don’t text soo sorry
47. turn ons
ya know if you REALLY wanna know this one ask off anon just cause then you can get a direct answer lol
48. turn offs
racism, sexism, prejudice (of any kind), intolerance, umm gore (like HELLA gore to the obscene amount), anything like abuse/r*p* and the like
49. where i want to be right now
somewhere NOT HOTH (it’s cold and snowy here...I hate it)
50. favourite picture of your idol
yeah skip
51. starsign
I’m Pisces in human form
52. something i’m talented at
apparently writing scenes that can break hearts :D
53. 5 things that make me happy
friends, video games, puppies/kittens, music, and sleep
54. something thats worrying me at the moment
dentist tomorrow
HATE dentist appointments, partially cause fuck dentists and second cause I have to be awake for like...8 am
55. tumblr friends
@thescarletbxtch @iamthelizardqueenx @lunar-lolo @kyostiel @queen-of-acheron @catherineparrs umm I have a lot actually like I talk to a lot of people on here but if we can on other things (discord/fb/twitter/whatever) we talk on those. I don’t MIND talking on here but if they have options I have we drop this for something else lol
56. favourite food(s)
pancakes, snickerdooodles, grilled cheese, french fries, cucumbers, cheese poofs
57. favourite animal(s)
Foxes, huskies, and munchkin cats
58. description of my best friend
1- constantly stressed out, can’t sit still, enjoys bugging me, short as hell, big eyes, can be cute when she wants to be, loves animals and has to be told “no” a lot when wanting to take in strays
2- clever, like way more clever than she realizes. Pensive a lot but can be loud, in charge and opinionated when you get her going. I buck heads with her sometimes but it’s mostly cause how alike we are. A ravenclaw true and true.
3- smart, kind, funny, dependable, loving, such a deep understanding of people emotionally even when they’re at their brink and want to crawl under a sink to hide forever. They are wonderful towards people and animals alike even if the people don’t deserve it
4- dead pan smart ass, feisty and giggles/cackles easily, extremely lewd but not offensively, loving and cares more for those around her than herself sometimes but allows us to care for her. also do not turn your back on her in a game, you’ll get shot lol she has no shame
5- very bookish, incredible easily fixated on a project they started, tends to be very considerate and needs to think of her OWN well being more than others- speaking of- make sure you eat somethin today dammit.
and they has a thing for trash guys, memes, and loooooooves women, but mostly the ones that can bench press her oh and brooooooody as fuck guys yeah those too lol
59. why i joined tumblr
honestly- I wanted to build a community/audience. I was at the time JUST finishing my first book before getting ready to start publishing it so I figured tumblr was “the new popular place” for that stuff
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