#and look i am an arty person and i got it from my parents for sure

[boltupbitches]

Sliding in the DMs Part XVI

“Well… looks like we gotta face the music.” Arty mused, watching the scenery pass by on their drive from the airport to Joey’s place in Costa Mesa.

Joey just made a sound of acknowledgment and stayed quiet. His favorite Tame Impala album played lowly in the background as he kept his eyes on the road. His eyebrows were furrowed together, obviously from the stress of their marriage leaking and his family’s negative reaction to the news - mostly his father’s reaction.

Arty was exhausted too. Athena was still troubled with her but respected Arty’s wish to talk in person after the honeymoon. There was still no word yet from her parents. She was sure her mom would reach out at this most inopportune time for Arty. That’s how she rolled.

Being back in the US seemed to only magnify the amount of texts and voicemails Arty got. She kept her phone on silent and didn’t post a thing on social media during their honeymoon. After talking to her grandparents and texting Athena back, she got it out only to take pictures of the beautiful landscapes of Saint Barts, but that’s where it ended.

They tried their best to capitalize on what was left of their honeymoon, spending time lounging in the sun, swimming in the ocean, shopping, going out on a rental boat, collecting seashells, and exploring as much of the beautiful island as they could.

She was exhausted now, however, as she knew there was a shit storm coming their way whether they were ready to face it or not. And that shitstorm was Joey’s family.

Pulling into the driveway of his Costa Mesa home, Joey noticed right away the two rental cars parked in his driveway and immediately let out an aggravated, “fuck!”

Arty didn’t even flinch because she was too busy staring at the vehicles with a blank face.

Looks like it was time to face the storm head-on, then. No prep time at all.

Joey laid his head against the wheel before looking up again. He stared at Arty with tired eyes, his frown lines more pronounced and his brows furrowed in frustration.

Arty forced a smile and reached over to grip his hand on the steering wheel. He turned his hand over to grip hers and lifted it to press a kiss against the top of her hand. “We’re going to be ok,” She reassured gently. “Whatever happens, happen. Just know I’m here for you through it all and no one is going to chase me away from you, Joey. I love you.”

He smiled back at her for her words and leaned in to press a deep kiss to her lips, using his free hand to cup her cheek.

He pulled back and smiled at her once more, nerves still showed in his eyes, but he was also calmer now. “I love you too.”

He turned his eyes back to his house, seeing his brother, Nick, peek through the curtain at them blatantly with unimpressed eyes.

“What’s that fucking idiot staring at?” Joey grumbled as he glared back at his younger brother. “He better not say shit to me given what he’s been sneaking around doing.”

Arty laughed at that, “Well, I’m sure he’s probably here to support you, Joey. That or he upset my sister and he’s here for help. Our situation might be a cover for his romance issues.”

“Of course. Gonna sit back and let me get dog-piled on until he gets a moment alone to ask for relationship help. Like usual.” Joey rolled his eyes and stared at an amused Arty. “He bothered the shit out of me to help him with his ex, Jenna. As if I, a single man at the time, would be able to fix that train accident waiting to happen. Anyway, let’s get in there and get this over with. The sooner this is over, the sooner I can kick them all out and we can get some sleep.”

Arty nodded and exited the car with him.

Nick opened the door and stared at them with disapproving eyes. “Way to run off after getting married and leaving me to get grilled by every-fucking-person you know, Joey!”

“Shut up or get the fuck out, Nicky. I am about to get my ass grilled in there. So either stand aside and shut up, or go back to whatever hotel you have your ass staying at.” Joey said lowly.

Nick glared back. “Well fuck it.. Welcome back I guess.” He held his hand out for a shake and Joey instead pulled him into a hug, smacking his back roughly. Nick laughed at that and hugged him back. “Congrats, bro.”

They let go of one another and backed up. Nick lifted his eyes to his new sister-in-law and smiled. “Congratulations, Arty. Sorry that the last time we spoke it wasn’t on good terms.” He offered her a hug as well.

Arty grinned at him and accepted the hug, mimicking Joey’s action of tapping him hard on the back. “No problem, Nick. Just as I know you’d never want anything to happen to Joey, please know I’m always looking out for my little sister.” She said seriously as they backed up. “I gotta call her later today. How is she?”

Nick slumped slightly, a sad look taking over. “I don’t know she hasn’t spoken to me all week since the news of the wedding broke headlines. She still thinks I knew about this whole thing in advance and she’s hurt about it. Could… could you talk with her and clear this up? Cause goddamn it sucks to be iced out like this.” He rubbed his neck nervously, looking down before looking back up at Arty with a pleading look.

“And there it is,” Joey mused with a smirk as Arty grinned back at her husband. “Nick needs us to clear his name to get back in his lady’s arms.”

“Listen -” Nick started to say in his defense.

“Josephy Anthony Bosa get your ass in here!” His father’s voice boomed from the end of the hallway.

All three stared into the house, seeing a pissed-off John Bosa staring back. “Thanks for the welcome back, dad.” Joey shot him a patronizing smile.

Cheryl appeared in the hallway, a frustrated look on her face. “Can you not be a fucking asshole for two minutes, John? Just two? We are here for an intervention, not a fight.”

“An intervention?” Joey laughed at that. “A fucking intervention?” He ran his hand through his hair. “For what? Falling in love? Being happy? You do interventions for people spiraling, not when they’re doing something positive in their goddamn life!” He spat, already losing his temper from the shit-storm the last few days.

“Positive?” John smirked, “What’s so goddamn fucking positive about marrying the first skank you had a date with in LA?”

Joey moved to charge at him when Nick quickly reached out and wrapped his arms around his brother tightly, holding him back. “Call her that again, call my wife that again! You don’t know fucking shit about her or even me these days! We’ve been together for almost a year. Tell me, how long after dating mom did you knock her up with me without marrying her until I was 6, dad? Huh?”

“Don’t bring up shit you don’t understand Joey.” His dad dismissed. “Your mom and I both had money. Who is to say that she isn’t with you for the money?”

“Well maybe if you were more present in my life outside of football you would have met her already and learned that her parents are billionaires!” Joey argued back.

His parents stared at him in shock, taking a moment to glance at a nervous Arty who was standing back and out of the way.

“Doesn’t change anything.” John broke out of his thoughts first. “You wanna run off and play house, not focus on your game, ice your family out, and even your friends. How can you be so goddamn selfish all the time? The first pretty girl that gives you attention and you jump like a dog, Joseph. Love doesn’t win games or Super Bowl rings.”

“You would know, right?” Joey countered. “Because you were a master at both. Being a player and a family man, right?”

John said nothing.

“Since we are having an intervention about me and how disgraceful I am for finally putting my happiness first, let’s talk about the root of my goddamn problems. You, Dad. It’s you! You’re such an expert player but you were a draft bust even before fucking your legs up. You were just as much a shit dad because as soon as mom broke it off with you for cheating so many goddamn times, you were in and out of relationships with women that squandered your money. Then you burned investors in a nightclub and a gym Uncle Eric helped you build. You’ve capitalized off of connections more than anyone else I know. Maybe it’s you who was a broke ass that latched on to mom for money and connections 'cause we all know you wouldn’t be able to do shit without her connections.” Joey ranted, still being held firmly by Nick who was frowning heavily at the situation.

“You are a no-good, disrespectful fucking prick, Joseph. You’re so ungrateful for everything we have sacrificed for you. Your mother and I didn’t work out -”

“Because you are a quitter who didn’t want to try. You quit on our family and only came around when it was convenient. That’s the truth. If it wasn’t football, you weren’t interested. It’s always been on your terms. Funny that when you were selfish and put yourself first every single time, we were collateral. Your wife and kids! Yet, I meet the love of my life and we marry and suddenly it’s the worst thing in the world.” He paused to look at his mom and dad. “Newsflash: I love my wife. I love Artemis. She’s been through so much with me and I’ve never once felt like a failure when I’m with her. Even when I almost screwed our relationship up earlier on. She’s the best goddamn thing that’s happened to me and I won’t let you try to ruin that. Never.”

“So you’ll pick her over your family?” John asked in disbelief.

“I am picking to stand by my wife. Why is that considered picking her over you guys? Why do you want me to choose? If you seriously loved and cared about me like you say you do, you’d support me and my wife. I don’t see it as choosing one over another. I see it as if you’re upset and don’t want to support me - us, then there’s nothing I can do.”

Nick gently released his hold on his brother, stepping back, but keeping his hand on his brother’s shoulder.

“Well,” his dad rubbed his head, his face not impressed at all. “I guess then you know where I stand.” He walked past his sons and Artemis, not even giving her a look of acknowledgment. “Come talk to me when you’re done destroying your career.” He slammed the door shut after him.

They were all silent as they heard him fly out of the driveway in his rental.

“Joey…” His mother stepped forward. “He wasn’t supposed to react that way. I’m so sorry. It wasn’t my intention to come here and yell at you. I just wanted to talk.” She said to him gently, walking towards him and opening her arms to hug him.

He sighed loudly and accepted her hug, pressing his head into her shoulder as his shoulders started to shake.

Nick quietly approached and joined in on hugging the two as well, being sure to support his brother.

Arty stayed back, watching with tearful eyes as her husband cried in the arms of the only family that was currently supportive of him without prejudice.

She could tell his mom and brother loved him dearly. She couldn’t figure out where his dad stood with his feelings given how much of an asshole he was just now to Joey and how she had heard him on the phone prior, as well as what Joey had shared about him. He was toxic – she knew that for sure. And he seemed the same manipulative and dismissive tactics her mother used. It was painfully familiar to hear those words thrown at her husband.

She wanted to intervene, but she knew Joey needed to let it out. He needed to stand up in that moment for himself, not just her. She knew he needed to feel like he reclaimed authority over himself once more, something his dad often tried to take from him and his brother.

That was so obvious for anyone unlucky enough to encounter an angry John Bosa. He was demeaning and cruel. Looking for weak points and doing his best to capitalize on them in that moment.

She was certain now, after meeting him, that she’d be ready for his antics next time.

There was no way in hell she was going to let John wreck his son’s marriage to her.

It would be a cold day in hell before that happened.

—--------

"So, you're the woman my son has been dating and is now married to?" Cheryl asked with an indiscernible tone. "While this isn't an ideal situation," she sighed and rubbed her temples, the glass of wine in front of her half-drank, "I'm glad to know Joey has been happy and not alone."

Both women were sitting on the patio chairs outside. Nick and Joey were speaking privately downstairs.

Cheryl was friendly to her, albeit reserved. They made polite chit-chat as Arty got them something to drink.

As soon as they settled outside, Arty knew Cheryl wanted to talk. Woman to woman.

“I am,” Arty confirmed. “I know this situation isn’t ideal… I don’t think Joey and I ever imagined a year ago that we’d be here today, but we are.” She took a sip of her wine.

Cheryl stayed quiet, letting her have the chance to finish speaking.

“It was never about hurting anyone by keeping it a secret. Neither of us asked the other to do so with our families. We were in a bubble of just the two of us for so long. Nick knew that we were seeing each other, but didn’t know the full extent. My sister, Athena, knew just as much as he did. Before we knew it, time had passed. We took a trip to Greece to see my maternal grandparents. I had no idea Joey was going to propose to me.” She stared out towards the oceanfront view they had. “And again, we ended up just not finding the right time to announce it to people. Except for our siblings, no one knew about us. So, introducing your partner who then becomes your fiance became intimidating. So again, it was put off.”

Arty was quiet once more. “We never did it intending to hurt anyone. I know the two of us, Joey and I, we both have personal circumstances surrounding family relationships. What happened with his dad this evening... I dealt with that with my mom. So, again, we leaned into each other and our habits of keeping things to ourselves.”

“Do you regret it?” Cheryl asked.

“Marrying him? No never.” Arty said firmly.

“No, not that, I mean, do you regret not sharing that you guys were dating and meeting each other’s families?” Cheryl sipped her wine, studying Arty’s expression.

“I don’t regret it,” Arty said. “Because living with regret and dwelling on what could have been won’t fix the situation at hand we currently have. I am sorry that it caused hurt for people. That was never our intention, but to regret how we got engaged and then married would be a lie. I like to believe things happen for a reason. Where we are now is where we are. We make do with the situation at hand.” Arty mused.

Cheryl nodded at that, taking in what Arty was saying. “I can respect that. Joey… he’s always been the child I worried the most about because of his heart. He wears it more openly. Even with how tall, strong, and serious he looks at times, you know like I do that he’s a gentle-hearted man most of the time. He loves wholeheartedly too. I was worried when I found out about all of this. Joey has gone through phases of being open with his emotions, then bottling them and hiding them away. At times it has made it hard to sit back and wait for him to express himself because he lets his self-doubts cloud him and drag him under.”

Arty was thinking of quite a few occasions where she had witnessed that first-hand. “I noticed that quite a few times too. He’s gotten better though, on leaning on me for support instead of hiding it away. We almost broke up before we even became official because he was afraid of facing what he was feeling. We’ve moved passed that now and he’s doing much better - at least with me.”

“I’m glad,” Cheryl said. “I think a lot of his reservation in sharing with me is that I’m his mom.. And maybe there’s an aspect of him wanting to be independent and not rely on me so much as an adult. I respect that. It’s how our mother-son relationship is. I’m glad that with you as his wife, he has felt comfortable in sharing with you and leaning on you for support.”

She sighed before continuing, “This was supposed to be a moment where we could get answers and talk. I regret inviting John along and giving him any benefit of the doubt that he could respectfully handle this without going straight into fighting with Joey. He still can’t be the adult in the room in any situation where he’s not in control.” She rolled her eyes at that. “I will always do my best to support my sons. Joey, he’s my firstborn, and just like with his brother, we share a unique bond that you’ll also someday feel when or if you have children. And while I am a little disappointed and hurt he didn’t feel like he could trust me enough to let me meet you sooner, I do trust his judgment and I am glad we can now get to know one another.” Cheryl smiled at her.

Arty smiled back, feeling relief seep over her at Cheryl’s willingness to build a relationship with her. “Thank you so much. Please know, Cheryl, that I would never do a thing to hurt Joey. Ever. I love him so much and I plan to for the rest of my life.”

Cheryl nodded at that, smiling once more at her. “A lifetime is a long time, but I believe that Joey’s found the one. Nick had mentioned to me how happy and relaxed Joey had been from the conversations they had. I noticed that too before all of this came to light. Like I said, I trust his judgment. He’s not the type to make rash decisions without feeling confident and strongly that it’ll work out. So,” Cheryl lifted her glass. “Welcome to the Bosa-Kumerow family. I’m so sorry our first meeting was us watching my ex-husband be an asshole. Just know that there will likely be more arguments to come. Lots of hotheads on both sides of the family. Just hold your own and don’t let anyone scare you off!”

“Welcome to the family!” Cheryl toasted to Arty.

They laughed and clanked glasses together, both taking a big drink of their wine.

“Glad to know you’re getting my wife wine drunk, mom.” Joey joked from the doorway.

Both turned and smiled at the man as he walked on out. “Well, I wanted her to feel more welcomed. I brought some wine if you want some, Joey.” His mom offered him.

“Nah, I’m good right now.” He took a seat next to Arty and leaned over to peck her cheek, making her giggle with his beard tickled her cheek. “Came out to join you guys. Nick’s on the phone, but should be out soon. I had to help him with a situation.”

“Is he ok?” Chery asked with concern, “I know he had some issue going on with how stressed he’s been.”

“Yeah, just a girl he was seeing was mad at him because he’s a dumbass. So I was helping him come up with an apology to get back on her good side.”

“Nick’s seeing someone?” Cheryl asked. “He didn’t say anything to me about it and he tells me everything.”

Joey turned towards a confused Arty, “It’s true. He’s a huge mama’s boy. Always been and always will be.”

“Joey.” Cheryl chided, but couldn’t help the grin that grew on her face.

“He is. It’s no secret. But yeah, that’s for him to share. I’m not in the mood for dealing with his whining if I share anymore.”

Cheryl rolled her eyes. “Fine, fine. I’ll get him to tell me later. Now,” She turned towards them. “Tell me where you went for your honeymoon.”

Arty started to share the details of what Joey and she arranged at last-minute notice. Joey stayed quiet mostly through it, just interjecting a few times to correct or confirm something. He was too busy staring at his wife as she excitedly pulled her phone out to show Cheryl the beautiful scenery she captured on her phone.

Joey loved how expressive she could be at times. She was silly and loved to have fun. She was more sociable than him, but could also be cool, calm, and collected when need be. She was entrancing to him and he knew others felt that way around her too. Artemis Bosa made him feel loved and she loved to show it. At that moment, he truly believed he was the luckiest man on Earth by getting to marry her. He couldn’t imagine his life now without her.

He was thankful he chose that day to slide in her DMs. Who could believe online gaming and social media would lead him to meet the love of his life?

[mymanyfandomramblings]

Glee-cap: Episode 4x15--Girls (and Boys) On Film

The continuation of my first-time watch of Glee episodic recaps, featuring my live reactions.

Okay, Emma looks so cute in a suit with her hair done up and red lipstick. Old Hollywood styles always look stunning on her

Will meanwhile...I don't like his hair slicked back like that

"You're All The World To Me" seriously suits Jayma's voice so well. I didn't used to really like Emma's voice, but her songs in the last two episodes have been wonderful

"THE HOUSE IS UPSIDE DOWN" I don't know why I find that as funny as I do

Sugar's outfit is truly brilliant. Sugar is truly brilliant.

Sam and his impressions, my beloveds

Sue's rants. I have never felt so seen as I have with Sue, specifically and only because her sentences go on for so long and have innumerable themes, subjects and lists, broken up only with commas and semicolons

"Shout" is super fun, and I never would have guessed that Brittany's voice would sound so good with soul music. My one concern is in the 'little bit softer now' part it just sounds like they've...turned the volume down, not like Blaine's actually singing quieter. That aside, it's so fun.

Sugar lying on the table is hilarious

This is how I find out that Downton Abbey was around in 2013. Also Adam does a very good Hugh Bonneville impersonation. Sam, take notes.

I can't tell whether Kurt's tone is sarcastic when he's talking about 'She's Having A Baby', but it is funny

Also Santana. I am liking her more this season, and I guess her saying offensive things is slightly nicer when she's not doing it in a mean-spirited way (or you know, a comparatively less mean-spirited way)

Kurt's introduction of Moulin Rouge. Comedy gold

I don't always like Kurt and Blaine's harmonies, but they work here

That looks like a great hug. That was an amazing hug.

Santana loves stirring up drama, and sometimes it makes her fun, and sometimes it makes her really frustrating

Although I do enjoy her calling out Brody for being a creep. I don't like him either.

Also Santana rooting through pockets and draws--HILARIOUS. She's doing it with such intensity too.

"You guys pretend to be all accepting and stuff, but when your friend shows up, moves into your home and goes through all your stuff, you're offended?" Okay, I can forgive all of her other offences briefly, Santana is too funny in this episode for me to hold them against her

Adam's accent just makes everything he says amazing

Finn and Artie committing to the bit with the wigs

Emma's parents are so equal part funny and horrible

Adams 'yea' is adorable

I LOVE that the boys have incorporated Artie's wheelchair into their choreo. Allyship fr.

Also, I know Sam was behind 'Old Time Rock n Roll' (a song I rly like btw)

I'm not convinced the girls can top that. It was legitimately an awesome mashup

Marley looks stunning

Girl, why would you ever believe Kitty when she says she won't tell. She's an awful friend.

I feel like all the glee bullies (except Quinn) do this thing where they feel personally compelled to zone in on particular physical features when talking about and to people

Marley, I pray you do not listen to Kitty. She is an awful friend, I repeat. Also her advice has never gotten you anywhere ever

Yes, Unique lead!

Oh my, Marley's voice suits this song to utter perfection *chef's kiss*

Old Hollywood glamour will always suit everyone

Also their mashup is straight-up out of Moulin Rouge, so I'm not sure they should be counted

Adam truly shines in this episode

I cannot not smile when Finn does. The eyebrow-raise, crooked-smile, shrug combo is just so sweet

I can't believe Will got his students involved in the public serenade, but then, this is Will

Emma's nightdress is so pretty

Okay now I know why the students were involved--so we can get this awkward moment when he thanks them and makes them leave

One nice thing about this show is that they do recycle outfits--Emma's coat in this scene is from S2 Sectionals

And they're still avoiding the whole Finn-and-Emma thing. I guess they think drama is better if you let it stew.

"I'm not. I mean, I am. Just not now." Santana, I will not say this often but, I love you

Santana genuinely being very comforting. I am liking S4 Santana

Jake Puckerman and Marley Rose--ilysm.

Oh no, girl. You are not imagining Ryder instead of Jake. Unlike, the Finn/Emma thing which needs to be addressed, I would really rather the Ryder-kissing-Marley thing be dismissed as a moment of weakness from Ryder and they go back to normal, where Jarley are sweet and Ryder is a good friend.

Marley, you need to get him into a good headspace for this kind of thing, not just drop it on him when he's just finished with a Big Romantic Gesture

(one the flipside I am so glad she told him before Kitty did. Kitty's evil successfully averted!)

And the winner is...everyone. (it's obviously the boys, even though the girls looked and sounded spectacular, the boys were original and more creative)

Sugar!!! Love her!!!

Finn finally confesses and like Marley, chooses a poor moment. I do, however, like that he got it all out there, rather than just going with the select information.

Cory Monteith truly was The Actor for subtle facial expressions. He really did put 100% acting effort into Finn

Britt taking off her shoe--love it

[ads-whatif]

↪ Have you heard about TINA COHEN-CHANG? SHE is 29 and hails from LIMA, OHIO. Looks exactly like JENNA USHKOWITZ, and is OPEN.

“I am a powerful woman, and my growing feminism will cut you in half like the righteous blade of equality.”

↪ IMPORTANT INFORMATION:

FULL NAME: Up to RPer DATE OF BIRTH: Up to RPer SEXUALITY & GENDER: Up to RPer RELATIONSHIP STATUS: Single POSITIVE & NEGATIVE TRAITS: Up to RPer OCCUPATION: Up to RPer CITY: New York, NYC

↪ HEADCANONS:

Tina was always a very awkward outside and very shy. She always did her best to stay under the radar of everyone else around her, whether it be social or academic. She was always so scared of being noticed that when she was still very young, she faked a stutter to help her not doing any oral presentation. As soon as she realized that the stutter was working with the school work, she decided to use that to help her protect herself from having interaction with anyone who she was not comfortable with. But, she found out that singing was a very good activity to help her out of her shell, and when she did sing, she wouldn’t even need to stutter and pretend to be someone who she was not. She would totally transform herself whenever she sang.

As soon as she joined Glee Club, Tina started to slowly relax and let her defenses down, and that was when she finally started to form new friendships and even relationships. After that, she was able to overcome her anxiety and she admitted that yes, she was faking her stutter. Tina became bolder and much more open about her feelings. But, deep down, she has personal insecurities like any other human being. She still feels like she is never good enough for her partners, she is always scared that they will end up cheating on her. That is still the only little thing she can’t change about her. She is not confident enough, yet.

After the chance Tina had in her senior year of high school to sing hung Up in the diva week in Glee club, she saw herself become slightly more confident in her performing and she soon realized it was something she wanted, originally she thought performing would just be high school and when she graduated she would never want to perform again but she was deceived, she knew that’s what she wanted to do, she wanted to go into performing.

Around the time when Tina graduated high school, her successful application and audition to NYADA, she got into a school in New York, she was worried at first that she would be in the shadow of Rachel again but that was wrong. She loved it and New York became home to her and she has loved it since and she is aiming to be a performer on the stage at some point soon.

↪ IMPORTANT CONNECTIONS:

MRS. & MR. COHEN-CHANG (Adopted Parents): Nothing to Mention. MAX COHEN-CHANG (Adopted Brother): Nothing to Mention. MIKE CHANG (Ex-Boyfriend): Their relationship started after Tina and Artie break up. During a summer break, they started to have feelings for one another, while they were at an Asian Camp, taking care of a few children, and as soon as school started again, Tina told everything to Artie, and that was how Mike and Tina became official. They involved quickly, and Tina gave her virginity to him, just showing how madly in love she was with him. But, during Mike’s senior year, things got a little hard for both of them, fights started to happen all the time, and their love was not as strong as they thought it would be and they broke up. And no matter how many times they tried to get back together, their relationship never worked as they thought it would work. Now, they are just close friends. ARTIE ABRAMS (Ex-Boyfriend): Artie and Tina started dating after they graduated high school and whilst they were in New York together. Unfortunately a while into it all, Artie got sick and it became too much for Tina to deal with and to focus on her future and being there to look after Artie that she chose to break up with him. She still cares for him deeply and will remain to be there for him if he needed someone. RACHEL BERRY & MERCEDES JONES (Best Friends): If you’d have told shy stuttering Tina when she joined glee club that years later, her best friends and two of the few people she had on speed dial would be the loud erratic Jewish girl and the sassy black girl who was only really there to park and bark, she would never have believed you. But Mercedes and Rachel are two of her closest friends. Despite all of the jealousy and arguing the three had been through during their high school years, they’re still her girls and she loves them wholeheartedly. BLAINE ANDERSON (Best Friend & Platonic Soulmate): Look, Tina knows her crush on Blaine in her senior year was embarrassing, and she can only look back on it and cringe. But Blaine was there for her when she needed him the most. Going through breakups around the same time was hard, but it pulled them together and they became each other’s emotional crutch. Now that Blaine is a parent, Tina’s adopted the role of auntie to his little one, and they’re still as close as ever.

                  Welcome! What If is waiting for you!

[what-if-rpg]

↪ Have you heard about TINA COHEN-CHANG? SHE is 29 and hails from LIMA, OHIO. Looks exactly like JENNA USHKOWITZ, and is OPEN.

“I am a powerful woman, and my growing feminism will cut you in half like the righteous blade of equality.”

↪ IMPORTANT INFORMATION:

FULL NAME: Up to RPer DATE OF BIRTH: Up to RPer SEXUALITY & GENDER: Up to RPer RELATIONSHIP STATUS: Single POSITIVE & NEGATIVE TRAITS: Up to RPer OCCUPATION: Up to RPer CITY: New York, NYC

↪ HEADCANONS:

Tina was always a very awkward outside and very shy. She always did her best to stay under the radar of everyone else around her, whether it be social or academic. She was always so scared of being noticed that when she was still very young, she faked a stutter to help her not doing any oral presentation. As soon as she realized that the stutter was working with the school work, she decided to use that to help her protect herself from having interaction with anyone who she was not comfortable with. But, she found out that singing was a very good activity to help her out of her shell, and when she did sing, she wouldn’t even need to stutter and pretend to be someone who she was not. She would totally transform herself whenever she sang.

As soon as she joined Glee Club, Tina started to slowly relax and let her defenses down, and that was when she finally started to form new friendships and even relationships. After that, she was able to overcome her anxiety and she admitted that yes, she was faking her stutter. Tina became bolder and much more open about her feelings. But, deep down, she has personal insecurities like any other human being. She still feels like she is never good enough for her partners, she is always scared that they will end up cheating on her. That is still the only little thing she can’t change about her. She is not confident enough, yet.

After the chance Tina had in her senior year of high school to sing hung Up in the diva week in Glee club, she saw herself become slightly more confident in her performing and she soon realized it was something she wanted, originally she thought performing would just be high school and when she graduated she would never want to perform again but she was deceived, she knew that’s what she wanted to do, she wanted to go into performing.

Around the time when Tina graduated high school, her successful application and audition to NYADA, she got into a school in New York, she was worried at first that she would be in the shadow of Rachel again but that was wrong. She loved it and New York became home to her and she has loved it since and she is aiming to be a performer on the stage at some point soon.

↪ IMPORTANT CONNECTIONS:

MRS. & MR. COHEN-CHANG (Adopted Parents): Nothing to Mention. MAX COHEN-CHANG (Adopted Brother): Nothing to Mention. MIKE CHANG (Ex-Boyfriend): Their relationship started after Tina and Artie break up. During a summer break, they started to have feelings for one another, while they were at an Asian Camp, taking care of a few children, and as soon as school started again, Tina told everything to Artie, and that was how Mike and Tina became official. They involved quickly, and Tina gave her virginity to him, just showing how madly in love she was with him. But, during Mike’s senior year, things got a little hard for both of them, fights started to happen all the time, and their love was not as strong as they thought it would be and they broke up. And no matter how many times they tried to get back together, their relationship never worked as they thought it would work. Now, they are just close friends. ARTIE ABRAMS (Ex-Boyfriend): Artie and Tina started dating after they graduated high school and whilst they were in New York together. Unfortunately a while into it all, Artie got sick and it became too much for Tina to deal with and to focus on her future and being there to look after Artie that she chose to break up with him. She still cares for him deeply and will remain to be there for him if he needed someone. RACHEL BERRY & MERCEDES JONES (Best Friends): If you’d have told shy stuttering Tina when she joined glee club that years later, her best friends and two of the few people she had on speed dial would be the loud erratic Jewish girl and the sassy black girl who was only really there to park and bark, she would never have believed you. But Mercedes and Rachel are two of her closest friends. Despite all of the jealousy and arguing the three had been through during their high school years, they’re still her girls and she loves them wholeheartedly. BLAINE ANDERSON (Best Friend & Platonic Soulmate): Look, Tina knows her crush on Blaine in her senior year was embarrassing, and she can only look back on it and cringe. But Blaine was there for her when she needed him the most. Going through breakups around the same time was hard, but it pulled them together and they became each other’s emotional crutch. Now that Blaine is a parent, Tina’s adopted the role of auntie to his little one, and they’re still as close as ever.

[queen-mabs-revenge]

“He got it from his mother.”

[natromanxoff]

FELIX TAYLOR INTERVIEW WITH QUEEN ONLINE - OCTOBER, 2006 (INTERVIEW-2)

PART-1

What kind of father is Arty? How you do describe him?

He’s a very nice man – generous and kind-hearted, and actually very funny when you know him well. My brother and sisters and I are quite mean to him, we’re always taking the piss, but we all love very much. He’s as much a friend as a father to me. Good drinking buddy too.

I know you're writing a new novel. Are you planning to publish it one day?

Of course, why else would I bother writing it? No takers as yet unfortunately, and I’m working on my second book – an occult thriller.

What is your unfulfilled dream?

To learn how to surf, become really good at skiing, and have a wicked job that allows me to do both for a good spell of the year. Oh, and have a lovely wife and kids, be really successful, and generally the don of everything. I’d like to be seen as a cross between James Bond, Sir Walter Scott, the Beach Boys and Ghandi. I’m quite clumsy and the idea of being super-dextrous appeals to me, but I know that I will always fall over if I do anything physical (it’s actually quite reassuring now – at least I know what I’m going to get if I try t show off).

Would you like to become a writer?

Very much, you can choose your own hours and be the master of the worlds you create. It’s such fun coming up with storylines and characters. What a great job if you can make any money out of it! The bit I like less is the actual writing, but you just need to grind on with that I suppose. I’ll carry on writing till I’m senile or I get a book properly published at any rate.

Where do you live?

In East London – it’s fun, and it’s the oldest part of London along with the City, so there’s buckets of weird stuff to discover. It’s also changing faster than any other part of London, and you can literally watch the buildings come down and go up.

Are you in contact with Brian's and John's children?

Not as much as I should be. We should see more of each other really.

What was the first single or album you ever bought?

I have never bought singles. I would like to be able to say that the first album I bought was something g really cool, but unfortunately it was Bon Jovi’s Keep the Faith. I later learnt the error of my ways and started liking proper music.

Did you often follow your father when he was and is on tour?

I went to quite a few dates when I was very young, but they stopped playing live when I was six. The only one I can really remember is Live Aid (glad that’s the one that stuck in my mind). I joined my dad on their last tour quite a few times (we got very, very drunk one night in Japan in particular – bet he remembers that one!), and boy was I impressed – they are leagues ahead of most bands in terms of live performance.

Have you ever been in Italy? If so, when and where exactly?

I’ve been to Rome, Sardinia and Naples. Great country, fun people and good food, and the attitude to life is very different. Bad politics though, such a shame for italy to have so many crooks in power (I suppose the UK’s not much better).

What kind of education your parents gave you and your sister?

I went to a French Government school in London, and then boarding school when I was 13. I was very lucky to get such a good education, and I loved boarding school – don’t understand why people would knock it as a concept (though I do understand why people have a problem with the idea of private schools).

Is your personality more on the same wave-length as your dad or as your lovely mum? And why?

I’ve got a temper, which comes from my mum’s side, and I’m quite stubborn (not sure which side that’s from – they’re both a pain like that). I look like my mother, but I’ve got my father’s tastes when it comes to most things, and we share the same sense of humour. They’ve both made me who I am, and I ask them for different types of advice. I love them both to bits though.

PART-2

What are you currently listening too?

Hot Chip’s new album, but there’s only one good song on it. My friend Kamila Thompson’s music, which is quite brilliant, lots of the Who, Muse’s new album (superb), Stevie Wonder’s Inner Visions and a little bit of Razorlight.

Do you plan to promote this single on MTV or other TV channels, perhaps with a video to accompany the song?"

Not up to me, trying to get it out there, and would love to have some video footage, but we need some radio play first.

As Arty and Brian May are close friends I was thinking if you and his son are in contact and if so do you see him often?

I do see him, though not as often as I should. He’s just got married and he’s one of the nicest people you could ever meet.

What did you study at College?

European history, philosophy and politics, with French language and literature. I loved my degree and worked really hard for it, but it was a fat lot of use to me really – a degree’s worth nothing these days, too many people have them.

When you were a child you often stayed with Chris Taylor, Arty's personal assistent. Are you still in contact with him?

No longer. Lost contact with a lot of people since those days. It’s a long time ago.

Is your nature similar to your mother's or your father's?

Bit of both really – good and bad elements from both.

Would you ever consider starring in We Will Rock You?

No, I’m not an actor and I don’t like musicals either. I think they’re silly (apart from the one you are talking about of course, which is the greatest show on earth, a must see for the whole family etc.) Besides, nobody’s asked me to do it anyway.

You have a wonderful voice, you said back in Part 2 that your teenage brother is a drummer, are there any other musical members of your family (apart from the obvious)?

Nope. My sisters are all very talented in other ways (medecine, painting/drawing, showing off…) but my brother is the musical one. He’s quite cool too, and good-looking, the cocky bugger – really annoying actually.

You had mentioned your favorite album by your father is Happiness? which contains a few political statements. Are you as politically opinionated as your father, or share similar beliefs with him?

Yes, I’m quite intolerant sometimes, and have to stop myself from being a dick in conversation when I get too passionate about certain things. I share many of my dad’s beliefs, but we differ on some things. I’m a liberal in the old fashioned sense I suppose, and I think everyone should have the same opportunities and freedoms, but not at anyone else’s expense. I think both socialism and neo- liberalism/Thatcherism are bogus, and don’t concentrate on what actually makes people happy, which is feeling like they are part of a community with those people around them and being free to make their own decisions.

Will we be hearing more of your music in the near future?

I hope so, depends on whether this record goes anywhere. We’ll make some more, but we need to see how well this one does at the moment.

PART-3

What artists, past and present, do you enjoy listening to?

Anyone with soul, balls (not in the literal sense – there are women on my list of favourites) or an attitude.

Are there any other creative outlets besides music that you wish to pursue?

Writing, writing, writing. I’m quite a good mimic too actually, and I want to submit a voicereel for radio, just to see if I get anywhere.

You can save one thing from your burning house, what would it be?

Passport – doh! No, it would probably be my girlfriend, though I might be tempted to take the playstation at the time instead.

What is your favorite memory during your childhood?

Playing doctors and nurses.

Are there any popular songs that you would like to give your spin on (i.e. "cover")?

Several – I don’t like Mondays, concrete jungle by Bob Marley, do you wanna dance by the Beach Boys… loads.

Who created cover to the " 'Woman You're So Beautiful'" single?

I drew it, the graphics dudes coloured it.

What music you DON’T you like?

Middle Of the Road, contemporary R & B (what is it for?), contemporary hip-hop and things like Justin Timberlake… even a pop song has to have soul. Nothing wrong with good pop. I also hate pretentious music which is rubbish but trying to be clever: Captain Beefheart, Franz Ferdinand et al…

My first question is, how did having a famous father affect you as a child? Was everyone eager to be your friend because of your dad's status or were most people pretty relaxed about it? Did your classmates give you a hard time about being related to a rockstar?

No, was always very lucky. Made sure to make friends with people before they knew my dad was a popstar. Never teased about this or anything, always had good solid friends. Never really helped with the girls either – I had to win them over with my natural good looks and charm.

Second, I was reading your answers from your last batch of questions and I was wondering if you would care to elaborate on your ambitions of being an author.

What a vague question. I want to write a book and sell it to lots of people. I like odd stories that involve the macabre or political/spiritual ideas. My favourite twentieth century authors are Lewis, Huxley, Robert Graves and Orwell.

I'd like to see how you look like. How about showing us a recent pic of yours? A real one of course, not that comic thingy. Wink

No sweat, I’ll post one on the Myspace site then. I look better in cartoon though.

What are your 5 desert island discs?

Not necessarily my favourites, as I would play them often…

Dark side of the moon, Inner Visions, The Who, live at leeds, Catch a fire and 2 Many DJ’s (the Soulwax mix comp.)

What did you think of the Queen + Paul Rodgers tour?

Brilliant, my dad has never played so well as on some of those dates… not just saying that. I was really impressed.

Beatles or The Stones?

Beatles! The Stones are a silly joke band after the Brian Jones period… they vastly inferior songwriters compared to the Beatles, they can’t do the harmonies or perfect vocals that the Beatles managed to put together, and they’re a twangy, plinky-plonky white blues band, so much less groundbreaking or sophisticated than the Beatles. They just had attitude when they played live.

Do you have any guilty pleasures?

Drink, being naked, taking a valium and walking around the house a couple of times a year. I like cold leftovers more than hot food as well, doesn’t matter what it is , if it’s been in the fridge overnight, it’s gold.

Roger’s PA is lovely could you introduce me?

I’m afraid she’s a taken woman! She is lovely indeed, a really special person, and I think of her as family. She can be scary sometimes though – she’s very good at her job.

INTERVIEW-1

[1908jmd]

BLATINA (or is it BLAINTINA or BLINA )

Call it meta, maybe

Again the topic of the nature of Blaine’s friendships has got me thinking, and I was considering certain things about those friendships. I meant to write something about these two for a long time, but thought I’d use my days off to do it, rather than any real life stuff. As you all know, I am a bit Blaine obsessed, and think about his character and interaction with his friends. Plus Tina is just adorably gorgeous, and often the least written about of the originals. This is going to be a lengthy post - sorry.

So I thought I’d look primarily at Tina and Blaine, and how their stories are so similar, so entwined for a season and a half, and then let go by the writers.

Background

One initial observation about the two of them is that we don’t factually get any solid details or information about their relationships with their parents. There is a reference in PUC, that Tina, is of Korean heritage like Jenna, but she’s only ever referred to in one of Sue’s insulting name calling as Asian number one. We are told that Tina is adopted by Jewish parents. It’s unknown if she has siblings, or the nature of her relationship with her parents. Of the original 13 - not including Matt - Tina is the only character whose mum or dad are not on the show AT ALL. There’s very little information given to us about her family life, which makes it impossible to judge why she has particular personality traits or why she behaves in certain ways, and whether it stems from her upbringing. For example, why does she look for attention or is so sensitive, and cry so easily. Fandom, as usual, can only make it up for themselves.

As for Blaine, there are slight references to his Asian heritage, and fandom has accepted his half Filipino roots just like Darren's. We meet only Blaine’s mom in A Wedding, when he has barely any interaction with her, and she’s not Filipino; she appears happy for him but they don’t hold any conversation together. There are stories about Blaine having a difficult relationship with his dad and his brother growing up. When Blaine talks about his dad in Sexy, or past experiences like in NBK, it’s clear that he has some issue with his dad, most likely about his sexuality. This is to become a fundamental aspect of Blaine’s character, developed mainly by fandom, and certainly head canoned by Darren: that his parents are not around much, somewhat neglectful and even just uncaring as he spends a lot of time alone, which causes a deep rooted dislike of being alone or left behind unloved. Plus the bad relationship with Cooper has led to the lack of self-esteem, self-love and actual confidence.

The lack of clear plot regarding both Tina and Blaine’s backgrounds has enabled fandom to flesh them out more.

Season one and two I see your true colors shining through

So let's talk about season one, Tina. Within the New Directions group, formed in episode one, she is the shy girl, compared to Rachel's loudness and brashness and Mercedes' sass and outward confidence. Even when the next three girls join, Tina is sold as less pretty, talented or popular because she's not on the Cheerios, or have all the guys of the school after her. Therefore, Tina adopts a fake stutter to hide her shyness, and avoid contact. Only when she starts dating Artie does she attempt to drop it - much to his horror. Will attempts to give her solo, only for her to be told she's not as good as Rachel. This of course impacts on Tina - her long term pleas for solos, attention and acceptance.

Jumping to season two, when Blaine first meets Kurt, his demeanour is the opposite to Tina's shyness - he seems confident, dapper, put together, and a strong mentor for Kurt. It's only as his character develops through season two and three, that we actually see that he has underlying vulnerabilities and he's actually covering up a lot of issues from previous experiences: such as the assault at a former school for being gay.

Both of them put on a front initially to be accepted and liked and fit in with the people surrounding them. One thing they make quite an impact and statement with is with their outward appearance and by what they wear. They value on clothes to hide their true feelings or build up their confidence.

Tina, in season one, sports a punk rocker style of dress and hair. Mostly in black, with black hats or hair bands, chains, and outfits with only a splash of colour. Her look is tough, inwardly she's very different. In Hairography, her choice of song, True Colors, which encourages someone not be afraid to show their true colours, or personality, to shine as they are beautiful, is a definite pointer to Tina's own qualities. She's added a blue t shirt to her customary black when she performs it. In Theatricality, when Figgins won't let her dress in black anymore, as he believes in vampires, she dresses in effervescent brightly coloured bubbles, to let her personality shine, even though she's "painfully shy". In season two her look becomes more of a goth, still initially black, but then gradually moving to more gregarious colours and outfits, as she spends more time with Mike.

As for Blaine, and how he presents himself, in season two, he's mostly in uniform, or certainly giving off the dapper, impeccably dressed young man, with immaculate gelled hair and good looks. When he's not in his uniform, he's in toned down darker clothes, mainly black, or brown and with no bow tie. Most certainly this is to fit in with the rest of Dalton, and not bring attention to himself, as he explains to Kurt in Special Education - we wear a uniform to fit in. Only in "New York" do we see him in a red cardigan, declaring his love. When he joins McKinley in season three, we see his wardrobe become much more flamboyant, though not as much as flamboyant as Kurt. He doesn't attempt to hide the fact he's gay, and reflects his personality in his clothes. He's no longer hiding behind darker clothes, he's wearing clothes that Kurt likes, including bow ties. This is the start of Blaine becoming more willing to show his true self, but still coping with his emotions, and past trauma of assault and insults for being gay. We see his sensitivities arise in Big Brother and Dance with Somebody.

So, in one and two, they hide behind their clothing choices - in three they start to develop their style which is more suited to their personalities.

Season three Take your passion, and make it happen

Throughout season three, both Tina and Blaine are in serious committed relationships, for 16/17 year olds, they have quite intense relationships with Mike and Kurt respectively. Both have moved on to the sexual side of expressing their love. Both are supportive partners: in Asian F, Tina confronts Mike's dad about letting him be what he wants to be; and Blaine is seen providing support to Kurt at the school election and during NYADA auditions. What is apparent though is the lack of real friendship with others apart from their SO. Tina is mostly seen with Mike, and though she is often with the girls, she doesn't have a particularly deep friendship or even rivalry with any of them. She does bond well with Mercedes, but we don't see a lot of them together. She shares secrets with the girls, such as how she lost her virginity to Mike, but her first choice of friend is always Mike. In Props, she initially rebels against Rachel always getting the solos, but in the end she helps Rachel with the trip to Carmen Tibideaux, and the reassurance from Rachel that she should be the soloist next year, when Rachel is gone. Likewise, Blaine spends the majority of his time with Kurt, and though he mingles with the boys, such as Mike mainly, the overwhelming thing about this season is his lack of solid friendships apart from that with Kurt. This becomes apparent as the season moves on, when Dance with Somebody shows Blaine's fears of Kurt moving to New York and him being left by himself.

This season Blaine was used very much as the human juke box and there were many great performances. Tina should have been given more moments to shine, because when she did, it was amazing to watch.

It is no coincidence that Blaine and Tina were sitting beside each other at the graduation ceremony in Goodbye, which is probably the first time, we really see them interact, not just dance together. It's a small reminder that they're going to be staying behind next year, without their true loves, and maybe there will be a budding friendship between them.

Season four Some nights…I could use some friends for a change

Season 4 and it’s all change at McKinley . The obvious plot concerning Tina and Blaine, in the first five episodes is the Klaine split, because of Blaine’s cheating as he believed Kurt had moved on with his life and no longer wanted him. Also, mentioned in passing, is Tina’s split from Mike as he went to dance college in Chicago. What the show didn’t do a great job of was actually dealing with the common issue behind these splits - the loneliness of being left behind, the huge life change for both of them, now their loved one has graduated and moved on. They are both isolated from each other at this point, as well as everyone else. Blaine's reaction to being alone is to self-destruct, and cheat. Tina's reaction is to throw herself into the Glee Club -trying to become lead vocalist, trying to encourage Brittany, with whom she never seems to have a good relationship; making costumes, and eventually auditioning for a role in the musical.

Initially, Tina has little sympathy with Blaine's dilemma, because she is not aware of his self-loathing at this point, and because she thinks she's got similar to deal with, and makes a snarky comment when Finn says Blaine is going back to Dalton Academy. In Dynamic Duets, we see Sam reach out to provide the support Blaine needs, plus the call with Kurt in Thanksgiving and in The Role You Were Born To Play, Tina makes peace with Mike. It now gives them the opportunity to move on, and we see them getting closer in Thanksgiving and Swansong. This becomes the turning point in their relationship, as they join the Cheerios together, and they arrive together in Don't Dream It's Over, as if they have been spending time together. They take comfort in each other's company.

Because of their closeness, the crush that Tina develops is not unrealistic. Blaine too can pass as a straight guy; plus also, he is charming, lovable and caring. She is sensitive and wants to be helpful, appreciated and loved. All personality traits that they both share, and both can see in each other. Tina devises the Sadie Hawkins proposal idea so that she can ask him out, in true Blaine style, by serenading him in public - unfortunately this leads to humiliation. They agree and Blaine lets her into a deeper secret about his crush on Sam. They make up, and go to the dance together, where they almost kiss. By this stage, Tina's need for someone to love her and believes Blaine is the one for her, and it leads her to act impulsively and inappropriately, and when alone in his room, and he has passed out on his bed, she "vapo rapes" him. It's at this point in the season that we see the loneliness affect Tina, that she doesn't have someone there to love her or love in return, and latches on to her best friend with a hope that she might stand a chance with him. Loneliness and lack of self love had caused Blaine to cheat at the beginning of the season; now it causes Tina to act inappropriately.

This is very uncomfortable to watch, particularly as he told her a few moments before that he was definitely not into girls, and would never have given consent to her touching him. However, when he finds out about it, he is somewhat amused by it, and embarrassed, but does not let it affect his friendship with her. Likewise, if we consider Blaine's parallel crush on Sam, the performance of Against All odds can be somewhat uncomfortable but ultimately Sam is understanding about Blaine's crush. Crushes happen, and thankfully it did not affect their friendship.

In I do, below, I always think how they look when they walk down the corridor with Kurt. Blaine has locked his arm into Tina's - it's comfortable, they are used to walking arm in arm or hand in hand, they're close together: they have a special friendship. Tina's other arm and hand are rather formally linked through Kurt's arm, and she's not leaning into him - she doesn't have the same level of trust or friendship with Kurt, and Kurt was pretty pissed off with her for touching and making a move on Blaine.

Rest of season four and season five. Don’t be afraid, take a sad song and make it better.

I think overall, Blaine and Tina got their most personality development in season 4 , which the writers chose to ignore in 5b, when Tina was hardly in the show at all. Plus let's face it, Tina only got scraps in a show that she could have got many more performances in.

For the rest of season 4 and 5, we see how much Blaine and Tina cared for each other and looked after each other. Their relationship in these episodes felt like big brother/little sister. Mostly loving and supportive, but sometimes snarky. Here are some examples:

Shooting Star. Blaine is most concerned that Tina's not in the room with them, and about her safety. Tina is so upset that's she's not there and know they are safe. Their chat in the corridor the next day is adorable, Tina tells him,l that he, and everyone else is like family to her, and he responds poignantly that she was in the choir room with them, because she was in his thoughts. This is such a big brother/little sister moment. The two of them crying together, so relieved, they've come through it. And whilst everyone else sits in couples around, they sit together, comforting each other.

Love love love - initially she doesn't seem to keen to be encouraging him to propose to Kurt, which must be an inconsistency, because she went with him to chose the ring in All or Nothing, showing her support for his intentions. He's there to round up the guys to sing her a song to build her up and get her out of her bitterness. She's there to hug Kurt as he entered Dalton - second behind Sam, Blaine's "best man".

Tina in the Sky with Diamonds - Tina's big moment to be prom queen, almost ruined by Bree's evil plan. But it's Blaine that's the leader of the New Directions in rushing to her aid, cleaning her up, and encouraging her to go back out and get crowned. Probably from watching how Kurt stood up to the bullies, in season two. Blaine gives Tina the confidence she needs to go back out, and he was right beside her, singing for her and encouraging her.

Frenemies and Trio. Affirmation again that they really care about each other. When Blaine gets valedictorian ahead of Tina and Artie, he asks them to join him to sing rather than hear him give a speech. Trio is a great summary of their relationship - how she adores him and does as he says, how much fun Blamtina actually have together, how they hope to be always friends (if only...), how much Blaine really doesn't like to see straight couples make out, especially his besties.

In New Directions, we get a wonderful version of Loser Like Me, as the four seniors sing a final song together before graduation, and they encourage Tina to join them in New York. Here we see Tina's insecurities and struggles as she believes she isn't good enough to get into big universities, (despite her great grades and talents - oh writers, ffs). Plus her dream of being in New York with all her friends, even if it means walking in on Klaine making out. Luckily, Blaine, Sam and Artie are there to encourage her to dream big, go for Brown, which she gets into.

One more song to recall - More than a feeling - their only duet. And they dance it perfectly together.

Season six I wish I could witness all your joy, and all your pain.

I've said many times that one of my pet hates about season six is how they just neglect the friendships of Blamtina - how if Sam and Tina had been around for Blaine more when he split from Kurt, maybe things would have been different for him. As it is, he went to beneficial therapy and it will proceed to help him with his marriage.

The one thing that the writers got right was that Blaine dropped everything to come to her, when she wanted to tell her "best boys" that she intended to propose to Mike. It's an odd scene, I suppose written to give Puck some more to do, but it would have made more sense if it had been Sam, with Artie and Blaine. At least, the show is acknowledging the Blatina friendship existed: the only time it did in season six. For the rest of the season, we don't see any more interaction between Blaine and Tina, though they are both there when Rachel wins her Emmy, and Tina says that she's heard about the forthcoming baby from Kurt and Blaine. It doesn't seem like they are in touch a great deal - which is such a shame, but not unrealistic as many school friendships do not last into adulthood, as the couples go their separate ways and have separate busy lives. It would be nice to think that they do meet up, even once a year, or at reunions. I was never fully happy Tina ended up with Artie - I loved the idea of her going to Browns, meeting many new guys, and becoming a successful business woman, if she did not stay in the arts. I was always drawn to her coming back as the Anderson-Hummels' personal assistant, but that's a head canon of mine only.

One more final thing: and I try to keep it short. Was it a comparison to Kurtcedes or Hummelberry? If anything, it is a nod to the Hummelberry relationship, where Kurt was continually supportive of Rachel; just as Blaine was to Tina, even if it could get a little demanding and irritating. And here's where I'm sticking my neck out, because I love it, if Blaine had been written as bi-sexual, then Blaine and Tina would have been a midgame relationship, and probably quite a serious one. There would have been a lot of mutual support and that could only have been positive, given their insecurities. Looking in detail at their friendship, I find it interesting that they are actually very similar: in background/family information; in the way they initially disguise mental fragility by how they behave and dress; the all consuming relationship with Kurt/Mike in three, detrimental as they move forward; their loneliness and insecurities causes them to act inappropriately; they are supportive and caring towards each other, with them supporting each other in four, and Blaine being super supportive in five; until we eventually don't see much of them together in season six. The show didn't write so much about the friendship, when one or both was in a relationship with someone else.

Let's end on a positive note - it was refreshing that Blaine and Tina were written as such great friends in 4/5, great to see them interacting, and performing and singing together. What assets Darren and Jenna both were to the cast.

[oumaheroes]

NZ and Artie hcs pretty please! Something 🥺 thank youuuu

Sorry this took me so long to answer!

I should start with something 'overall' first. I've enjoyed seeing different fandom interpretations of New Zealand throughout the years- as a shy golden boy, to rambunctious fellow play fighter, to mud weary tomboy, to a poised daughter, or all at once. For me, potentially due to how Zea has been canonically drawn, New Zealand is non-binary. What they've got going on under there ain't my business and they certainly don't care. I’ve therefore given them the name ‘Alex’- for the feminine or masculine version, who’s to say.

They very much live by the feeling 'I am New Zealand', and whatever that entails. Nothing more, nothing less.

Childhood/ Teenagerhood:

England had really settled into the swing of things at this point. He was used to children, used to parenting in general- the ups and downs of it - and used to keeping his children at more of a distance emotionally than he had with Canada and America. So, by the time Zea came about there was a smoother transition into family life than there had been for poor old OZ. Australia, who had a few brief years of England as a more affectionate, happy, and relaxed parent, was abruptly cut from contact for a few years and then reintroduced to someone stricter and far more distant and which has left their relationship a bit strained at times.

Zea knew nothing else. From the get go, England set a standard of behaviour and maintained it. On the one hand this was good: Zea never struggled around England, either in being comfortable in his presence or with the 'new' rules that were in place, and also never suffered from any sort of consequence that came from having a parental figure suddenly do a 180 on you.

On the other hand, they did grow up slightly lacking in the affection department. They knew England loved them, but as soon as they became a little older there were less hugs, less kisses, less of playing silly games and more study, learning, and filling their days with their own company. They were used to this and it didn’t bother them at the time, but compared to their older brothers, or younger ones (seeing him with Sealand does spark some bitterness), they certainly missed out, and have inherited England’s current (in)ability to interact physically with loved ones- they’re not overly touchy-feely and express love through acts of service or gift giving.

Mainly though, Zea's childhood was good and quite stable. They were home schooled, but England also used to like sending them off for playdates with noble families with children to get them more acquainted to people their physical age, or would take Zea with him into town to work with their politicians or their tradesmen. Zea thus spent a lot of their time waiting, either sitting on the floor of England's study, or somewhere around him outside, watching and listening to him work and talk shop with people.

Nations are robust things, sturdy and, surrounded by their people, not really in too much danger. I think England was rather lax in this regard with his children (someone who had a childhood of wandering around villages, foraging for food, and being personally thrust into war from a young age will hardly find a town centre in the 1800s dangerous) and used to leave New Zealand with some local children for entertainment if he needed to go and do things that required a bit more time than a quick chat.

Because of this, a humdrum of business is something New Zealand finds to be a soothing white noise, something they can filter out or tune into easily, and they appreciate this unorthodox education. They’re also very happy with their own company and can entertain, and soothe, themselves independently.

Not to go on too much of a tangent (because I do do that, in these posts), I just want to quickly touch upon Zea and Oz’s relationship because I think that helped cover up for what they were lacking in terms of openness and easy affection from England- Zea because they never really had it, and Oz because he was missing it. Due to how close they are geographically, and potentially because England on some level felt guilty for his inability to fully let himself go and open up to them, New Zealand and Australia spent quite a lot of time with each other in either of their lands from England moving them about with him when he visited one or the other. Both were also sometimes taken back home with him to the UK and a lot of Zea’s exposure to a more ‘traditional’ Kirkland upbringing comes from their time with their bother- playfights, arguments, mischief, and an open easiness with each other’s raw and unfiltered company.

Back on topic and to summarise, New Zealand's childhood relationship with England was a good one. As I mentioned in my Canada headcanon post about a similar topic, England is very, very good with small children and Zea was no different. But as they got older this decreased rapidly, something that they considered perfectly acceptable at the time but now is something they sometimes look back on with a small amount of hurt and confusion.

Teenagerhood they were very used to being on their own and, funnily, when you think about what England was trying to do, very independent. Not independent like America, with his fights for recognition as an independent entity removed from England, but independent personally. A childhood of watching England work and playing often by themselves meant that Zea as a teenager was studious, quiet, and happy to be left alone or taken out for company (similar to Wales in personality, I reckon. Need their alone time and will take themselves away if this is not given).

Arguments with England were rare- Zea’s not one for butting heads but would much rather learn the ins and outs of everything and then put forth and argument for change. England may be a hothead and stubborn, but he’s not closed minded. It’s how you approach him that matters and Zea caught onto this early. Whereas Australia would shout or refuse to do that he was asked if he didn’t want to, or would put up some form of fight, New Zealand would instead do the task, do it well, and then request time with England to formally present him with all of the reasons their proposal was far better.

England being told he is wrong will likely not listen if he believes himself to be right (even if he has doubts, someone telling him that his way is bad will make him stubbornly cling to it just to prove them wrong and himself justified for doing it in the first place- clawing and scraping for even an inch of a victory). But England being told that someone has thought of a different way, and asking for his opinion on it, is far more likely to inspire change. He feels valued and goes into the discussion with an open mind that most often went in New Zealand’s favour.

Because of this, they do have a reputation of having England wound around their little finger from a young age. But really, they were just smart enough to figure England out and use it to their advantage. They were also smart enough not to overplay this hand, and so their teenagerhood was peaceful and calm.

Adulthood:

As adults, the two are on very good terms. England prefers adult children to teenaged ones, especially calm, well-mannered ones, and this relationship improved after Zea got their independence. Rather like a burst of relief from England’s end, I feel- he’d spent so long paranoid about his colonies leaving him that this clouded his enjoyment of them. With them finally independent, that worry is redundant and he can enjoy them for the people they are. And Arthur likes Alex, he really does. He finds them mature, funny, and intelligent. The two have similar hobbies and interests and England often spends time with them travelling about to beaches or passing book recommendations back and forth.

Being nations heavily shaped and surrounded by the sea, this is something that is a huge passion for the both of them and they often go sailing together on the ocean, either on smaller boats by the shore or for larger trips out to sea. Arthur willingly took all of his children out to sea, but Alex was the only one who really took to it and shares a similar hunger for it as he does. They’re probably the least openly affectionate pair of all of the Arthur- child relationships, but that doesn’t mean he loves Alex any less and, most of the time, Alex knows this and is content with the way things are. As mentioned in my Canada post though, England is trying to improve himself in this area in the modern day and he’s trying really hard with Zea, (though this is sometimes awkward for the both of them.)

[wheresmynaya]

Hate to Date Ch.9 | Brittana

A/N - Lots to process, hey? I’ve been seeing in the reviews all the guesses of who will develop feelings first (& the few that are convinced they’ve already figured it out lol). It’s always interesting to see what y’all are thinking! Anyways, thanks for “tuning in” each Friday & thanks to those who have gifted me a coffee through ko-fi too. While I’m still in Lockdown 6.0, it’s really the little things that make a big difference. Until next time! 💙

Available on ff.net (x) ao3 (x) & under the cut!

“Okay,” Santana huffs as she turns to the blonde. “I know Artie’s your friend and you’ve got history and all but fuck that guy. Seriously, what the hell was that?”

Brittany nods along sadly, “I figured you’d say that once you met him.”

“God,” Santana shakes her head still coming down from wanting to cause bodily harm to him. “He really is a tool. Like the balls on him, complimenting you in front of your girlfriend. What a dick!”

“Yeah,” Brittany scratches at the back of her neck. “I told you he’s changed a lot.”

“You mean he used to be less of a dick at some point?”

“Surprisingly, yeah,” Brittany replies. “He won Most Brilliant Brainiac last year and now he thinks he’s God’s gift.”

Santana scoffs, “A gift that needs to be returned.”

“Stop,” Brittany scolds lightly. “He’s still my friend.”

“Well you sure know how to pick them.”

Brittany frowns and Santana instantly regrets uttering the words. Sometimes her mouth runs faster than her head can filter and by then it’s too late. Usually she wouldn’t feel bad about speaking so honestly but there’s something about the way Brittany pokes out her bottom lip like that that makes Santana falter.

“Sorry,” Santana says guiltily.

Brittany looks to Santana and nods, “I know he’s not the easiest person to get along with now, but he does have his moments.”

“Does he? I mean, what is the appeal?” Santana questions genuinely. “Because the personality is not a winner. I don’t even see him with a hot piece like me for arm candy.”

Brittany chuckles, “Yeah. I’m surprised about that too. I thought he would’ve brought two dates just to show off.”

Santana scrunches her nose in disgust, “It would take more than two dates to change my mind about him. Why does your team keep him around?”

“They love him. He’s so knowledgeable about so many things. He’s perfect for academic decathlons,” Brittany shrugs. “But I’m not sure how long it’ll last. He’s a great mentor but he’s gotten so critical of everyone, even me.”

“Especially you,” Santana corrects. She starts to feel heated all over again, “I can’t believe the way he spoke to you. Who the fuck does he think he is? Like sure, I can find you a little hard to swallow sometimes and it’s annoying how you’re just naturally great at so many things but I’d never say the things he did.”

“Honestly, I’ve heard worse things,” Brittany reasons. It sounds as though she’s trying to be lighthearted but the look on her face is anything but and that breaks Santana’s heart a little. “Artie’s criticism is nothing compared to what people used to say about me growing up.”

Santana frowns, “That doesn’t make it okay though. You know that, right?”

“It’s fine. I’ve got tough skin.”

“That’s not the point,” Santana sighs. “You shouldn’t have to take that kind of crap from anyone.”

“Sometimes you have to,” Brittany replies. “Sometimes you just have to take it and do the hard work in silence. Let the success speak for itself. Getting caught up in what everyone thinks is exactly how I lost my way before, so I’m not going to do it again.”

Santana shakes her head. She gets it – she really does – but it doesn’t make it any less okay.

These little glimpses of Brittany’s childhood really make Santana feel for her. She was fortunate enough to have parents and teachers who encouraged her studies – sometimes in an overbearing ways – but at least she had the support.

For Brittany, it seems like all odds were against her and for some twerp like Artie thinking he gets to be another one of those little voices making Brittany doubt herself really grinds Santana’s gears. He’s the worst kind of manipulative.

“It’s fine, really,” Brittany adds upon Santana’s silence. “I can take it when it’s coming from a friend.”

“Friend?” Santana laughs dismissively, “We’re not even friends and I’d never put you down like that.”

Brittany looks at her curiously and it makes Santana feel suddenly self conscious. Maybe her honesty has gotten her trouble yet again?

“Really?” Brittany asks.

Santana doesn’t hesitate, “Well yeah.”

Brittany’s shoulders ease a little and Santana takes that as a sign to continue.

“I was seriously this close to slapping him upside the head,” She says. “I may be many things and people may have occasionally called me a bitch from time to time, but even I wouldn’t stoop to the level he’s on. I wouldn’t put down my friend.”

Brittany’s brows rise, almost out of disbelief.

Santana wants to ask what that look is, but she’s a little nervous about the answer so instead she averts her attention to the dancefloor. She keeps her eyes roaming the crowd, avoiding meeting Brittany’s gaze.

“He’s just a little blunt,” Brittany attempts to reason again.

Santana shakes her head, “Whatever it is, you’re better off without him.”

Brittany sighs, “I just, I still care about him. I know I shouldn’t, but I don’t know. Have you ever felt that before? Wanting to hold out hope for someone to change?”

Santana’s anger dissipates for a second. Those words resonate with her and drudge up an unwanted memory. Has she ever felt the way Brittany does? The blonde has no idea…

Upon her silence, Brittany continues.

“You probably think I’m crazy but,” Brittany lets out a tired sigh. “Maybe I am. I just wish there was a way to bring back the real him – the one that took the time to show me around when I was new here. You know, the one who cared.”

Santana softens, because she knows the feeling all too well and it sucks big time.

“Don’t we all,” She mumbles.

Brittany looks to her, brows raised. Santana finds herself meeting Brittany’s gaze again and it’s like with one look at her the truth is impossible to hold back.

“How long do we have to suffer before we realize they’re not coming back though?” Santana asks. “What if that’s who they are now? This uncaring, unloving, unfazed ghost of a person we can’t even recognize anymore. That’s all we get and we’ve just got to deal with it and…and move on.”

Brittany looks at her curiously.

Santana averts her gaze to the crowd again, “Once again we have way too much in common for my liking.”

“What do you mean?”

Santana sighs, “I mean, you should just cut your losses now before it’s too late.”

Brittany smirks but it doesn’t quite reach her eyes, “Clearly you’ve never been in love before. It’s a bit harder than that. Not that this is love, I don’t know what this is.”

“It’s not love, that’s for sure.”

“Like you’d know,” Brittany jokes lightly.

Santana has the urge to laugh.

She’s almost forgotten that Brittany still doesn’t know that much about her past, because if she did she’d would know that Santana, of all people, knows what it’s like to be in love with someone you wish you weren’t.

“Well, I know it’s better to be told straight up about how you feel rather than to always wonder what went wrong or what could’ve been,” Santana finds herself saying. “But sometimes we don’t get that luxury. Maybe it’s just better to let it go and move on.”

“Or maybe he’ll finally snap out of it and see what he’s been missing now that I’m in this fake relationship with you.”

Santana’s surprised by Brittany’s honesty. The blonde looks surprised that it escaped her, but the two just stand there staring – trying to grasp the gravity of what they’ve both revealed.

Brittany’s using Santana to win over Artie; it’s almost laughable and yet, Santana can do nothing but stare in disbelief. She gets it though; she’s desirable, completely out of someone like Artie’s reach. Dating her would be enough to rattle anyone with eyes so it makes sense.

She knew Brittany was cunning, but it still surprises her. At least Santana’s reasoning for doing all of this has to do with her future, but Brittany? What’s Artie have to do with hers?

Santana scrunches her nose as her head starts filling in the blanks to that question. She pictures Artie in her place beside Brittany; them holding hands as they make their way to class, them making dumb googly eyes at each other at the library, them being this unstoppable power couple because of their success in academic decathlons.

It’s gross.

But who is she to pass judgement? She’s doing all of this because she couldn’t hold down a relationship to save her life, she’s in no position to judge Brittany’s.

And it’s not like this is the first time she’s been used like this before. Some of the girls she has been with only need her for a night, a way to get back at an ex or to make someone jealous. If anything, she’s become kind of an expert when it comes to being the middle-woman.

What’s the difference knowing Brittany’s doing the same? She supposes there isn’t one.

“Well, I guess I’ve found the real reason why you agreed to do this,” Santana says to fill the silence. As the words leave her, there’s an odd feeling in the pit of her stomach.

Brittany looks away and replies, “I guess so.”

There’s a long pause where the two of them look anywhere but at each other. Santana’s gears are moving a mile a minute just trying to figure out the why of it all while Brittany’s – Brittany’s a mystery.

Santana glances back at her curiously, watching her profile and suddenly wanting to know more. How could someone be so blindly hopeful? Who knows if she’ll ever get that answer, but until then she still has to fulfill her obligation to Brittany tonight.

“Well, if this is what you really want to do then,” Santana pauses – trying to shake off the surprise and get back into the zone. Tonight’s about Brittany and being her perfect fake girlfriend and what Brittany wants, Brittany gets. “Then we’ve got to do this the right way. Really show him what he’s missing.”

Brittany quirks a brow, “Seriously?”

“Yeah. Guys like him always want what they can’t have,” Santana says simply. “It’ll be so easy.”

“And what do you suggest?”

Santana smirks, “Just follow my lead.”

\\

Santana’s lead ends up involving lots of flirting. Her goal was to help Brittany make Artie jealous, but she secretly kind of likes the uncomfortable look he gets anytime he happens to glance their way. He’s not so cocky and arrogant now!

It only gets worse when Brittany offers Santana a dance.

They find Mike and Tina again on the dancefloor and the couple waves to Santana and Brittany happily before getting lost in the music again. Santana and Brittany do the same, but it takes them a second before they find their synchronicity.

Afterall, this is their first time dancing together – things are bound to get a little awkward.

Thankfully, it’s all upbeat stuff – songs that are easy to groove to and they find their rhythm a couple songs in. The couple keeps it tame for the most part, almost forgetting what all of this is for, until they notice Artie watching again from a distance.

Brittany notices him first and starts dipping her hands lower and lower down Santana’s back, letting them settle low around her waist. It has Santana’s heart rate spiking until she catches on and starts letting her hands roam too.

“Poor guy,” Santana jokes when she catches sight of him. “He has no idea what he’s started.”

Brittany chuckles although she shakes her head, “It’s almost mean.”

“Fuck him,” Santana shrugs before turning her back to Brittany. She reaches back with one hand settling at the base of Brittany’s neck. “It’s his loss. Isn’t that the point of this?”

“You’re right,” Brittany nods. She leans into the crook of Santana’s neck, “His loss.”

Brittany then sets her hands on Santana’s hips, strong and steady, and pulls her in close so that their hips fit snuggly. It surprisingly tugs at something deep and dormant within Santana and she finds herself leaning into it, rolling her head back to rest against Brittany’s shoulder.

With the way Brittany’s rocking into her along with the beat, Santana has to bite her cheek to keep from making a noise. Who knew someone who spends most of their day in a musty library could move like this? Santana’s a little starstruck to say the least.

She can’t remember the last time she danced with someone like this and she starts to feel the effects of the alcohol and a tiny bit of desperation because it’s been such a long time. It’s actually sad how tightly she’s wound up. She’s sure she’d probably snap from just a touch which is so not her style, but she knows she’s not in the right kind of company to finally break.

She’s on the job; Brittany’s a job and there’s no time for mixing pleasure with work.

But damn, does it feel good when Brittany’s hands squeeze at her hips. Or when she rocks into her so smoothly along with the beat. Or how it sends shivers all over her when Brittany whispers into her ear – she’s not even saying anything risky but God it doesn’t matter.

And even if all of this is for show, Santana’s so deprived of this kind of affection that she doesn’t care – Brittany can use her all night if she wants.

Santana doesn’t begin to notice where her thoughts are taking her until she spots Artie wheeling away.

“He’s leaving,” Santana notes as she turns in Brittany’s embrace.

Brittany’s hands go to rest against the small of Santana’s back, “Do you think he gets the idea?”

Santana smirks and looks up at Brittany, “I think everyone gets the idea.”

A blush starts to bloom as blue eyes dart bashfully away, “Sorry. Was that too much? I was just following your lead like you said.”

“It’s fine. It’s the most action I’ve had in awhile,” Santana jokes.

Brittany gives her a unimpressed look but Santana’s smile only grows because of it.

The music shifts to something slow, old school Elvis. Santana recognizes the instrumental instantly; Maribel and Eddie’s first dance song. Honestly, it’s most couple’s first dance song – apparently you can’t get any more creative than Can’t Help Falling in Love.

She attempts to find her exit, but they’re surrounded by couples now. It would cause way too big of a scene to try and escape, so she goes with her only option. She lets Brittany take the lead and they start to sway.

Santana’s fingers thread at the back of Brittany’s neck while the blonde’s hands fall to Santana’s hips. They do the slow side-to-side move, but the sudden closeness has Santana feeling oddly shy. It’s bringing back memories of school functions and dancing awkwardly with dates she never wanted.

“You really miss it that much?” Brittany asks softly while they sway. “All the hook-ups?”

Santana sputters a laugh, unsure of how to respond, but one look at Brittany has her realizing that the blonde is genuinely asking. Her smile falters and she goes back to looking everywhere but inquisitive blue eyes.

“You gonna shame me for it again?” Santana asks jokingly.

She hates how quickly things between them can feel way too personal for her liking. Even more so, she hates how easy it’s starting to be to want to open up more around the girl.  

“No, I was just curious,” Brittany shrugs. “This probably isn’t what you’re used to doing at a place like this.”

“I’m not usually at places like this.”

“You know what I mean,” Brittany replies. “Parties or clubs or whatever. You wouldn’t be slow dancing with a potential lay. You don’t seem like that kind of girl.”

Santana scoffs playfully, “Well once again, you don’t know me at all. Slow dancing is my jam, it really gets the girls hot and bothered.”

Brittany quirks her brow, “Seriously?”

“Of course not,” Santana chuckles. “I’m usually out of there by the time the slow songs come on. They’re not my style.”

“Knew it.”

“But it’s not horrible,” Santana dismisses as they continue to sway. “I wouldn’t say slow dancing with you is at the top of my list of the worst things I’ve ever had to do.”

Brittany looks surprised, “Oh really?”

“It’s in the Top 5 for sure,” Santana jokes. “But it’s not number one.”

“You’re too kind,” Brittany jokes.

“I try. But hey – you’ve surprisingly got rhythm, Pierce!” Santana compliments. “Wouldn’t have pegged you for a dancer.”

Brittany laughs, “There’s a lot of things you don’t know about me.”

Santana chuckles, “First the little thing you’ve got for Wheels and now this? I don’t think I can handle anymore surprises for the rest of night.”

Brittany rolls her eyes, “But you’re having fun?”

Santana shrugs, trying to be dismissive but her smile gives her true feelings away. She’s at a fancy place with great music and free alcohol looking fly as hell and one of her missions for the night is to piss off a chauvinistic douchebag – fun is an understatement.

“It’s not the kind of ragers I’m used to,” Santana teases. “But yeah – I’m having fun. Dancing with you is fun.”

Brittany’s face fills with a grin, “Yeah. I think dancing with you is fun too. It’s a bonus that Artie gets a little peeved as well.”

“That’s probably my favorite part,” Santana agrees and they continue dancing for a little while longer.

\\

Santana finds that messing with Artie is child’s play, but it’s oh so satisfying.

Santana and Brittany take turns pretending to whisper sweet nothings into each other’s ear once they get to their assigned table. They find it easy to giggle along with one another when their sweet nothings are really just lame pick up lines that would never work in real life. But they say it in these ramped up seductive voices and that makes it all the more hilarious.

Meanwhile, Artie sits across from them with a sourpuss look on his face.

Maybe they’ve gotten away from the point of all this – that being to make Artie jealous – or maybe it really is working? Whatever it is, Santana can’t find it in her to reel them back in, not when it’s this much fun.

\\

Dinner is served not too long after and Santana’s amazed once again by the spread. There’s giant cuts of filet mignon atop a colorful array of fresh Spring veggies. There’s oysters and huge lobster tails and extravagant towers of shrimp! The organizers clearly spared no expense with the menu and Santana excitedly awaits her dinner as the waitstaff start to come around to top up everyone’s wine glasses.

Santana watches as dishes are set down in front of everyone, all alternating between seafood and steak and the occasional vegetarian option. Everything looks so damn good and she glances next to her, wondering what Brittany will get.

“I ordered the shrimp,” Brittany tells her just as the plate is set down. “I got you the steak. I hope that’s okay? I wasn’t too sure.”

“Classy,” Santana nods as her plate is set down too. The garnishes make it look like artwork and she’s almost too afraid to touch it. “God, this looks so good. You didn’t mention there was free food too. This place is heaven.”

Brittany chuckles as she reaches for her cutlery.  

While everyone eats, there’s quiet chatter amongst the table.

Santana’s so glad that Mike and Tina are around, at least that’s one couple that she doesn’t mind. Most people are pretty pretentious – all I’m so much smarter than you because I know random shit about random shit – and it makes Santana want to roll her eyes so hard but she doesn’t for Brittany’s sake.

Unlike Santana, Brittany gets along well with everyone and somehow sees past the horrible personalities. That’s not too surprising considering how she feels about Artie though.

Then again, maybe Brittany was right about there being a nice guy underneath all that ego because when Artie does finally get to talking to her again – he’s not a dick. They talk excitedly about comics or something and Santana notes the way they both light up.

For once, there’s a glimpse of him being a decent human being and maybe – just maybe – Santana sees what Brittany does.

But he’s not off the hook just yet, not after the way he started off the night. She doesn’t want to rock the boat though, so she quietly eats her dinner and plays the role of perfect fake girlfriend just like she said she would. This night isn’t about her, it’s about Brittany and she’s going to do her best to keep it that way.

\\

A while later, dessert begins to be brought out as a few speeches are given up on stage. The announcer talks about the many prestigious teams in the room and how talented everyone is judging by their high percentages. Most of it goes over Santana’s head, not really interested in how academic decathlon clubs work but what does spark some interest though is when the awards start getting presented.

There’s a kind of anticipation that settles over the room and Santana looks around noting just how many clubs are in attendance. She had no idea academic decathlons were a thing until this year, but to see everyone so on edge as they await the reveal of this year’s winner really puts things into perspective for her.

When Santana glances to her side, she finds that Brittany’s got her eyes squeezed tight and her fingers are crossed on both hands. As she looks around the room, she sees club members look similarly – hoping and praying.

The Brainiacs happen to come in Second Place in the overall thing, but Brittany stands and claps along with everyone else despite things not going her team’s way. Santana watches her and smiles because this girl really is just so pure. Here she is clapping and pumping her fist in the air as the first place team take to the stage. Nothing about it is forced because she’s genuinely happy for them and that amazes Santana.

She didn’t think people like Brittany actually existed and yet there she stands.

\\

The lead up for presenting the award for Most Brilliant Brainiac is much more anticipated.

Santana looks around the room as it seems like everyone’s on the edge of their seat. It’s almost comical, because it’s basically an award for the biggest nerd in the room and these people actually want it.

Still, Santana listens quietly.

She notices Artie fixing his dumb bowtie and checking his teeth in the reflection of his silver spoon as if he already knows what’s coming. She so hopes he doesn’t win just because of that. She doesn’t care who it goes to, she doesn’t care if it’s an even bigger tool than him – if that’s even possible – all she cares about is watching the guy get the biggest reality check known to man.

Suddenly, she’s on the edge of her seat just like everyone else.

“This year the award goes to,” The announcer pauses for dramatic effect.

Santana’s still waiting for the name to be called out, but the spotlight shining directly beside her is answer enough.

“No way!” Brittany beams. She doesn’t know what to do with herself, she just looks from side to side making sure that the spotlight is on the right person. “Me? It’s me?”

“Come on up, Miss Pierce!” The announcer gestures proudly.

Their entire table turns to applaud. Santana notices Mike with the biggest grin on his face as he claps while Tina’s snapping picture after picture for her article.

Brittany’s in awe as she makes her way onto the stage, the crowd roaring with applause as she goes. When she gets to the podium, the man hands her a gold trophy shaped like a brain and then presents her to the room.

“Here she is, folks! This year’s Most Brilliant Brainiac! Give it up for Miss Brittany S. Pierce!”

Before she realizes it, Santana’s on her feet in a second and claps so hard her hands start to sting.

“That’s my girl!” She shouts and pumps her fist in the air.

Brittany must hear her from the stage because she ducks her head bashfully at the shout out, her cheeks going a little pink as she soaks in the applause.

Santana glances over at Artie who barely claps. She rolls her eyes at him, because he yet again shows his true colors. How he flies under the radar is a mystery to her, but Brittany’s not around to hold her back this time.

So she points a threatening finger at him and rubs a little salt in his ego.

“Take that, Professor X! You suck so bad!”

Artie looks a little scandalized, but he keeps his mouth shut as Brittany absorbs the limelight. She looks at her trophy like she can’t believe its hers and Santana swears she sees those pretty blue eyes start to well with tears. This time they’re happy tears though and Santana’s so relieved for that!

A moment later, Brittany’s making her way back to their table with her new trophy in hand.

“Look! It’s so heavy,” Brittany giggles as she shows off the award to Santana.

Santana smiles fondly. Only Brittany could be this proud about being the dorkiest dork in the room. She doesn’t know what it is about the way she looks, the way her eyes light up to match the brilliance of her smile, the way they seem to be even bluer than usual.

All she knows is that she can’t help but pull Brittany in for a deep kiss.

She can feel the way Brittany stiffens in her arms at first before relaxing – the kiss takes her by surprise too, she can only imagine what Brittany’s thinking.

Alarm bells ring but then she feels a cool hand touch her cheek and suddenly everything stops because she’s being kissed back.

Brittany’s kissing her back.

It’s soft and gentle and when Santana pulls away, she’s swears she sees stars.

All Santana’s thinking about is the way Artie spoke to Brittany earlier, how he scolded her like a child. She thinks about Brittany’s parents and how they never truly supported her until recently. She thinks about the stories Brittany’s told about her experiences in high school and her time at MIT. She thinks about how after all of that, Brittany’s still maintained her kindness.

Brittany’s better than her, she’s so much better than everyone here, and she doesn’t even know it.

And maybe Santana’s just really proud of her – that’s why she kissed her? Maybe she’s just really into her whole fake girlfriend role right now? Maybe she’s just super committed and she’s finally matched Brittany’s level of going above and beyond?

That’s got to be the explanation for it, because no way she’ll admit to it being anything else.

“I’m so proud of you,” Santana quickly says. “Way to stick it to those guys.”

Brittany blushes, “I really didn’t expect anyone to vote for me. I hope they’re not mad.”

“Fuck them if they are!” Santana retorts. “You worked so hard for this. If they can’t be supportive of you then they don’t deserve you as a teammate.”

Brittany relaxes upon hearing Santana’s words, “You mean that?”

Santana smiles and nods like it’s simple, “Well yeah. You’re a genius, Britt.”

Brittany grins again and looks down at her trophy bashfully, “I’m also Brilliant.”

“Yeah, that too,” Santana chuckles.

They go to take their seats when they realize everyone’s kind of staring at them still. Santana doesn’t care all that much, Brittany deserves the recognition. She finds a kind of joy in making sure she knows it too.

“Seriously though, congrats,” Santana tells her. “You really earned it.”

Brittany ducks her head before leaning closer and whispers low enough so only Santana can hear. The move makes Santana’s heart suddenly race as she’s reminded of their time on the dancefloor earlier.

“Is that you talking or my fake girlfriend?” Brittany asks.

Santana bites her lip as she ponders that. For the first time, it’s kind of hard to tell. This arrangement is like being on-call; you never know when they have to slip into character so now it’s second nature and maybe it’s finally starting to blur the lines which Santana didn’t think would ever be possible.

But just to be safe she says, “I’m a pretty good actress. Aren’t I?”

Brittany only smirks as they both start to giggle and admire her new trophy while Artie stews in his jealousy.

\\

They spend the rest of the Ball taking pictures with Brittany’s trophy for the school magazine and hitting the dancefloor once again.

Obviously, the dancing is the best part and by now everyone’s got a good buzz going with the amount of booze in the place. It’s surprisingly a good time – one of the best Santana’s had in months and it’s even more surprising that it’s in Brittany’s company.

If you would’ve told her at the start of the semester that this is where she’d be right now, she wouldn’t have believed you at all. Never in a million years would she be caught dead in a place like this, but it’s funny how things change – how relationships evolve.

Just tonight, she walked into this Ball wondering if she even stood a chance up against Brittany’s wrath. She really messed up, she knows that, but all of this is new territory for her. She’s not used to looking out for anyone else other than her family and Puck, but she’s starting to get it now.

If Brittany was anyone else, Santana probably wouldn’t have cared about her hurt feelings the other night. She would’ve let the girl go without a second thought because who has time to put up with the drama, but this relationship has her doing a lot of things she normally wouldn’t.

It’s reintroducing her to things that have been long forgotten and Santana doesn’t really know how to feel about that. It’s drudging up the old Santana; the vulnerable, the gullible, the sensitive one who has no place here now.

It’s a lot more than she signed up for, but she supposes it’s only natural to have those feelings start to resurface again when they’re both so committed to playing their roles perfectly. If anything, it’s a reminder that once upon a time Santana really was perfect girlfriend material.

And tonight, she gets to live out that little memory.

Maybe if her heartbreak didn’t harden her, maybe this is what she’d be like? Maybe she’d actually date a girl like Brittany? Maybe she’d stop selling herself short just like Puck said? Maybe she’d stick around long enough for something real to happen?

Maybe. Maybe. Maybe.

It always takes Santana by surprise that when she gets to thinking like this, it’s always in the presence of Brittany. This girl; Santana knew being with her would be a challenge but not like this. She can’t hold it against her though, after all this is her idea and really it could be so much worse than what it is.

They don’t really owe each other anything, they’re just pawns in their elaborate games – but here they are dancing the night away without a care in the world and for once things feel fine.

It’s a nice break from all that heaviness from earlier.

And for a moment, Santana doesn’t think it’s all too bad. The whole possibility of being friends with Brittany thing; when it’s like this, it really isn’t the worst thing ever.

She might actually kind of like it.

Other than Puck, Santana doesn’t really have that many people she’s close with. She doesn’t have many people she’d consider friends. For the past two years, maybe even longer, she’s kept people at an arm’s length.

After everything, she’s just not into getting close to anyone anymore. Letting people into her shit sounds like a lot of work and kind of terrifying.

What if they don’t like what they find? What if she’s too much? What if they decide to leave too? What if it changes her again?

It’s too big of a risk. It’s best that she does the leaving instead. It’s the only way she can keep some type of control on things, because no way she’ll let anyone go for a joyride with her feelings again.

She likes to keep her circle small, but being around Brittany starts to make her wonder. What’s the harm in trying?

A thought like that makes her laugh though; that hopefulness is a direct result of hanging around Brittany way too much.

“It’s so hot in here! Why’s it so hot?” Brittany sighs and wipes at her brow with the back of her hand. Her cheeks are flushed and sweat glistens in the hollow of her neck deliciously.

Santana averts her eyes when she realizes she’s staring.

“You’re dancing up a storm, that’s why!” Santana teases.

“Because it’s so much fun!” Brittany does a twirl then starts to sway when she stops. “The dizziness…not so much.”

“Maybe don’t spin around like that?” Santana suggests playfully. “You want to go outside? Get some air?”

“Yeah, let’s do that,” Brittany nods but just before she follows after Santana she runs back to the table. “Mike! Mike, watch my trophy!”

Mike drunkenly nods and gives her a thumbs up.

“Thanks! Okay, let’s go,” Brittany tells Santana and leads the way out.

They end up going to the grand steps Santana walked up earlier in the night and take a seat by one of the columns. The air is crisp and refreshing compared to the stuffiness inside and it’s such a relief. They rest their heads back and soak it in.

“You see Artie’s face when I won?” Brittany giggles.

Santana smirks, “Oh yeah. That prick; I was hoping he’d lose. Makes it even better that it was to you.”

“I know I shouldn’t think it but,” Brittany pauses to take in a deep breath before letting it out in a sigh. “I’m glad he lost too. Maybe it’ll bring him down a notch.”

Santana chuckles, “Hopefully it’ll bring him down a few notches. That guy is a piece of work. I still can’t believe you’re into him.”

Brittany ducks her head and sighs again as they fall into a comfortable silence.

Even if Brittany doesn’t show it, Santana can feel something’s gone unsaid.

They haven’t talked about the kiss from earlier, but maybe there’s nothing that they need to talk about? They’re out in public, it goes without saying that they have to do what normal couples would – like kiss when your girlfriend wins an award.

Why would they need to talk about it? It’s not like it was the first time they’ve ever done that. Then again, when Santana gets to thinking – the last time was New Year’s Eve.

Maybe Santana’s just overthinking it all? This is why she doesn’t do relationships or feelings – real or not! They’re confusing and annoying and she doesn’t want it.

God, she wishes she was on Brittany’s level of tipsy. That would make things so much easier!

“You know when we were talking before, you said that we’ve got too much in common,” Brittany mentions awhile later. She keeps her eyes turned up to the sky as she asks, “What’d you mean by that?”

The question takes Santana by surprise as she tries to remember their conversation from earlier. When she does, she wishes that she didn’t. It’s not a subject she loves talking about, nor does she love revisiting its memories, but for some odd reason she can feel her safeguard wavering.

“I guess I was in your place once with Artie,” Santana replies. “Sort of.”

“You were into him too?”

Santana chuckles at the joke, “No way. I mean, I fell for someone I shouldn’t have.”

“What happened?”

Santana pauses, wondering if she wants to go down this road. The only other person she’s ever talked about all this to is Puck and that’s only because he was partly involved. She’s done her best to bury every feeling, every memory, but there’s something about Brittany that has Santana opening up just a little more.

“There was a girl a long time ago,” Santana finds herself saying before glancing Brittany’s way. “The one from the picture in my room back in Lima.”

Brittany nods and quietly encourages her to continue.

“She was my best friend growing up,” Santana says. “The only one who ever understood me. We were close, closer than friends should be. Eventually, I wanted to be more – make things official.”

“You?” Brittany asks in disbelief.

“I know, shocking,” Santana jokes through a sad smile. “She said she wanted it too, but she was afraid. She wanted to keep things hidden, keep us hidden, and I…I loved her so I followed along.”

Santana feels her chest tighten with that long-forgotten pain, but then Brittany’s hand finds hers. She squeezes softly at her hand and suddenly the feeling isn’t so bad.

“She kept saying one day it’ll be different,” Santana goes on. “One day we won’t have to hide, one day we’d just run off together, but until then we had to pretend. It sounded like a good plan and I felt so strongly about her, so I waited. I watched her get into relationships with guy after guy just to keep people off of our scent, off of her scent.”

“The older we got, the further in the closest she went. It was like she forget that it was all a cover and the life she was living was a lie.”

Brittany nods sympathetically.

“I ended up coming out midway through our Junior year,” Santana says. “I thought that maybe if I went first then she’d see that it was okay, but it kind of had the opposite effect. Something happened, maybe her parents divorce or something else? I don’t know, but she changed and not in a good way. I was out and proud but it was hard when the girl I loved wasn’t. It kind of felt pointless but I kept waiting for her.”

“By Senior year, I started to lose hope. I guess she did too because it stopped being about us running off together. Instead it was only her doing the running,” Santana continues. “While everyone was making their big plans for college, she was a mystery.”  

She starts to feel that annoying lump in her throat forming and swallows it back.

“All I knew was that she was getting out of Lima by any means necessary,” She says with a deep sigh. “She was so closed off though, spiraling even. I had no idea what her plans were anymore. No one did. I just didn’t think that it involved stealing my shot at a scholarship.”

“Wait, what?” Brittany frowns. “What scholarship?”

“My school had this partnership with Harvard,” Santana answers half-heartedly. “An alumni or whatever is a big wig there and has this scholarship aimed at students with extraordinary promise in law. It’s such a waste, really. No one usually goes for it because no one ever dreams of getting out of there nor would they dare go to law school, but getting out of Lima was always our dream. With her family background, she could get in easy but me? It was a little harder. That scholarship was my only shot and she took it.”

“How’d she do that?”

Santana shrugs, “It’s always been a mystery. Out of the entire school, we were the only ones who even cared enough to look into it. We agreed before that with my GPA and personal goals that I’d have the better chance of getting it, but that was before things changed. It’s no coincidence that she got in and not me. I ticked every box when it came to the type of candidate they were looking for.”

“You couldn’t tell the organizers about it?” Brittany asks. “Have them kick her out or something?”

Santana sighs, “I couldn’t do that to her.”

“Why not? Santana, that’s seriously unfair. This is your education, something you’re so passionate about.”

“I know,” Santana answers dejectedly. “Believe me, I know. But, I was young and in love and stupid. I still had hope for some reason, hope that she’d snap out of it? I knew she took her parents divorce really hard and things had changed for her in terms of getting into Harvard with their help. Maybe she needed the scholarship more than me?”

“Even so, that’s not the way to go about it. That’s not fair to you.”

“True,” Santana nods. “But a part of me figured that maybe once she got in and got settled, she’d be okay? Maybe we’d be okay again. Maybe getting out of Lima was something she needed way more than I did? I guess I was wrong though.”

Brittany looks to Santana apologetically but Santana hates that look. She hates being seen as anything but confident and sure and unwavering.

“See? Told you I’m not selfish,” Santana tries to joke to ease the tension.

It doesn’t really change the way Brittany watches her though.

“Yeah, I guess you were right.”

“Surprise,” Santana lets out a weak chuckle as she averts her gaze. “It sure did backfire though. Huh?”

“Have you heard from her since?” Brittany asks. “Did she ever apologize?”

“Hell no,” Santana tries to laugh off the pain. “She didn’t even stick around for our graduation ceremony. She just packed up and left. No goodbye or anything.”

“Wow,” Brittany shakes her head. “How could someone who’s supposed to care about you hurt you like that?”

Santana finds herself smirking as she looks to Brittany. She has no idea she’s in the same sort of situation with Artie. It’s always easier making sense of things when it isn’t your problem though she supposes.

“Anyway, it’s whatever,” Santana waves off. “It’s been two years and I still wonder why the hell I gave up a Harvard education for a girl. Love makes you do dumb shit, it’s the worst.”

Brittany goes to squeeze Santana’s hand again, “I’m so sorry, Santana.”

Santana keeps on her brave face, “It’s fine.”

“It isn’t.”

Santana knows, but she just shrugs. What’s the point of feeling sorry for herself now?

“I guess what I was meaning earlier is that,” Santana continues. “Maybe this thing between you and Artie; it’s better for you in the long run if you spare yourself the heartache and accept that people change. Sometimes it’s for the worst and you can’t do a thing about it. It is what it is, you know? You can wait but it’s only wasting your time in the end – take it from me.”

Brittany nods and they both rest back against the column again, sitting in each other’s company in silence. It’s like Brittany’s taking in all that Santana has said while Santana attempts to pack up all those little memories she’s just drudged up and stuff them away.

“People change for the better too though,” Brittany mentions quietly. “Sometimes all that patience and time you put into waiting ends up being worth it.”

“Maybe,” Santana nods. “I just don’t know how to be that optimistic anymore. I’m too tired.”

“I get that,” Brittany replies and leans her head against Santana’s.

Santana finds herself leaning against Brittany too, relaxing against each other in a peaceful balance. Another comfortable silence settles over them and Santana’s thankful for it. After opening up to Brittany, she doesn’t think she can handle anymore of these heart to hearts.

Another reason she keeps to herself, talking about feelings is exhausting.

“You know…I didn’t say it before because I was still kind of mad at you,” Brittany mentions softly. “But I’m glad you changed your mind about tonight. I’m glad you’re here.”

Santana smirks, feeling a giddiness flutter in her chest that chases off the remaining heaviness there. “Yeah well, picturing you suffer here all alone with these losers wasn’t as satisfying as I thought it would be. Thought I’d come see it for myself.”

Brittany snickers and pokes lightly at Santana’s side.

“Sounds like you might be taking a liking to me,” Brittany teases.

Santana scoffs playfully, “God no.”

“I mean, if you really wanted me to suffer you could’ve worn something that would make you look a little less…”

Santana glances over to find Brittany stumbling on the right word. The hesitance makes her smirk.

“Hot? You were going to say hot.”

Brittany rolls her eyes, “I wasn’t.”

“Sure,” Santana teases. “You can admit it, Britt-Britt. You think I look fine as hell.”

Brittany shakes her head although she begins to blush. “You always this full of yourself?”

“You should know the answer to that by now,” Santana quips as she rises to stand. She strikes a sexy pose while Brittany continues to sit before her. “Come on. Would you really rather I turn up here looking a hot mess? I wouldn’t be doing a very good job of being arm candy.”

Brittany’s eyes rake up Santana’s body, taking in all her perfection. Just like the powers of her cheerleading skirt, Santana’s dress works wonders all the same.

“I guess not,” Brittany admits.

Santana grins, “That’s what I thought.”

“But you’re not just arm candy to me,” Brittany teases sweetly.

Santana instantly rolls her eyes and holds out her hand to Brittany, “Let’s get back in there. I think it’s time for another drink. I can still taste your Chapstick from earlier.”

Brittany giggles as Santana pulls her up, “You say that like it’s a bad thing.”

[beatricethecat2]

NOTE: Sorry for the repost, but a friend told me this installment was not showing up in a tag search (it was not). So I took out all the links and am trying again. Look back through my Tumblr for previous installments!

* * * * * * *

"Chill for a minute! You're making me nervous," Myka says.

"I'll not miss the performance because of a third-rate watchman," Helena huffs.

"Abigail said she'd sort this out."

"Abigail got us into this."

"She didn't slug him."

"He tackled me."

"You grabbed the book and ran."

"And I'd have succeeded were it not for that wandering child," Helena gruffs. "Who brings a child to theater?"

"You wouldn't have brought Christina?"

"Were she old enough and properly dressed, yes. That child was in dungarees."

"They probably came to see the exhibition not the matinee—"

"We're not dressed properly either," Helena grumbles, swiping dirt off a pant leg.

"Theater's not as formal as it used to be. And you did put your hair up," Myka says, flashing a feeble smile.

"And now it's mussed. It wasn't much to look at to begin with." Helena fusses with her bun.

"Hey, I think you look really nice," Myka says, reaching over, stilling Helena's hands.

"This is hardly theater attire."

"It's the Oregon Shakespeare Festival not the Met Opera."

"Attending the theater used to mean something." Helena's hands drop to her lap.

"It still does, but not corsets and gowns." Myka raises a brow. "Would you have worn a dress if this was a real date?"

"I very well may have. I'd certainly have made more of an effort."

"A nineteenth or twenty-first century effort?

"May I not embody both?"

"Yeah, but I'm just noticing you sort of default to the nineteenth when you're around me."

"And you disapprove."

"No. It think it's kind of sweet. I like that you don't have to hide who you are with me." Myka bumps her shoulder into Helena's.

"And to think, I once yearned to live in a future such as this. I'd no clue how exhausting it'd be being out of time."

"It'll get easier," Myka says, meeting Helena's unsure gaze. She leans towards Helena and Helena follows suit, their lips nearly touching when a door slamming in the distance halts the action.

"So, um...when's the last time you saw Shakespeare?" Myka asks, recomposing herself.

Helena thinks back. "Hamlet, in Stratford; Sarah Bernhardt as lead. We'd travelled specifically to see her, as it was unusual for a woman to play a male's part. She was her bombastic self, but watching Shakespeare translated into French was odd. I may have opinions about the American accent as well."

"Oh you will."

"Flipping through those gravures on display really took me back. Then the cabinet cards...are you familiar with those actors?"

"No."

"Such a shame," Helena says, pushing up from her slouch to sit upright.  "Ellen Terry, she who worked so very hard to elevate the acting profession for women and men; Lillie Langtree, the beauty who pulled her reputation up from the mud through her craft; Violet Vanbrugh, locked in competition with her sister for the spotlight...celebrities, one and all, yet seeing them now, they feel like lost friends." 

Helena sighs deeply and looks away. "When I snatched the book, my mind was no longer present. Hence the guard getting a jump on me."

"It's going to work out," Myka says, flashing a comforting smile.

"How exactly is Abigail remedying this? I heard little of your hushed conversation earlier," Helena says, narrowing her eyes at Myka.

"She's convincing them to put it back so we can swap it with a copy she's sending."

"Could she not have done so previously?"

"With Artie out of town, she's scrambling to keep up."

"How exactly is she convincing them?"

"She's, um..." Myka looks down at her lap and adjusts her wrist watch. "Do you actually need to know?"

"I do now," Helena says, swerving in her seat to face Myka.

"She's posing as your therapist."

"And I'm a babbling idiot."

"No...our pitch is you're obsessed with Victoriana."

"Convenient," Helena grumbles, crossing her arms over her chest.

"Do you want to see the play or not?"

"What do you think?"

"I think we wouldn't be here at all if Abigail hadn't asked us to snag volume nine of 'The Illustrated Library of Shakespeare.' And I think she'll fix this for now so we can see a play like two normal people who see plays. We'll worry about the book tomorrow."

Helena's scowl stays firmly in place.

"I'll make it up to you tonight at the hotel," Myka says, eyes pleading.

"Placating me for performing the Warehouse's bidding is not in the least desirable—"

"Ooh, look, he's coming out," Myka says, patting Helena's leg as she rises to talk to the head of security. "Stay here."

Helena stays put but her scowl grows all consuming.

-END SCENE-

------------------

Bering and Wells: Field Trip ("Warehouse 13" Season 5 replacement) Season 1: Episode 7 Title: Oregon: To one thing constant never

Summary: With Warehouse staff stretched thin, Myka and Helena are asked to dash from Myka's parents to The Oregon Shakespeare Festival. The pickup hits a snag when Helena, lost in memories, bungles the retrieval. Emotions run high when Helena reveals an unshakable impulse that threatens their newfound bliss.

Previously:(look at the archive of my site)

------------------

BONUS SCENE

The next day, in the parking in the lot of the festival, freshly off the phone from the Warehouse, Myka turns to Helena.

"Artie's booking us a flight. He wants us to bring the book in person—"

"We are not altering our plans again," Helena sneers. "He can pick it up from us."

"I think he needs it sooner," Myka mumbles. "It'll be quick, just a day or two. Maybe we can push our bookings up?"

"As if that's worked in the past."

"True," Myka says, shoulders slumping as she sighs defeatedly. "Then we'll skip Mendocino and head straight to San Francisco from there. I'll grab some of my stuff since we might stay in the city longer." She turns the key, revving the car to life.

"I'll drive to Mendocino and meet you in San Francisco. You go on to the Warehouse."

"But Artie said you can come," Myka explains, looking over her shoulder, backing out of their parking spot. She puts the car in drive and moves towards the exit.

"There's no reason for me to do so."

"But you haven't met Abigail. Or Steve, really. Plus Claudia's dying to see you—"

"Myka, I can't."

Myka steps on the brake and turns to face Helena. "Is this a Regent thing? Because Artie wouldn't have said you could come if you couldn't."

"It's not a Regent thing."

"Then what?" Myka huffs.

"We've not time to discuss this now."

"Then tell me the abbreviated version."

A honk from behind jolts them both.

"Alright, alright!" Myka grumbles, pulling out of the parking lot and onto the road.

"You go on. I'll follow our plan," Helena says. "I wish to feel the land shifting underfoot, as if Elizabeth, Christina, and I had made our way through California in my own day."

"Wouldn't that have been on a train? Or a carriage maybe?" Myka asks.

"Is a car not the modern equivalent?"

"I guess," Myka says, her face the picture of concern. "You know, most of San Francisco was destroyed in the 1906 earthquake. There's not much left from back then."

"No matter. It's the spirit in which it's encountered."

"Then I want to 'encounter' it with you."

"Then have them pick the book up from us. You're not obligated to obey their every beck and call."

"I guess not," Myka says, frowning as she stops at a red light.

"Their prerogative led us to rush here, waylaying our plans," Helena presses.

"And the plays."

"Which we may have seen, in our own time, had we not been browbeaten into a retrieval—"

"We weren't browbeaten, we were helping Abigail—"

"The light's green."

"I see that," Myka grumps, the car jerking forward as she presses on the gas too hard. "So that's why you won't come with me? You're mad we came here in the first place?"

"It more than that. My relationship with the Warehouse must remain distant. Better if I retain none at all."

"How exactly is that going to work? Because I live there."

"I'd rather not discuss this while you're driving."

"Then I'll stop." Myka flips her turn signal and veers left at an intersection. She swings into a parking lot turns off the engine. "You said I'm your One. That we're partners."

"You are both of those things to me."

"But you can't come to the Warehouse, maybe ever? Explain." Myka shifts in her seat to face Helena as fully as possible.

"I've come to understand distance may be the only remedy for certain...triggers."

"What triggers?"

"Where to start?"

"Anywhere, really," Myka gruffs, holding onto Helena's petulant gaze.

"A hundred years in bronze weighs heavy on one's soul."

"You were fine there before."

"Was I?"

"You said it was your tether!"

"I'd have said anything to—"

"Gain access, dupe everyone, and destroy the world. I know." Myka scowls. "But you wouldn't do that again."

"That's no longer my vice," Helena says.

"Then what is?"

Helena looks off into the distance. "A secondary plan, utilizing artifacts catalogued since my bronzing."

"W-What kind of plan?" Myka says, her back straightening.

"One in which Christina would be returned to me."

"Wait, you tried again when you were there?"

"How could I not?" Helena laments. "I've hatched countless schemes since."

"But you said you'd made peace with not having kids."

"Moving forward. But I may never find true peace with Christina's passing. Apparently, it's not uncommon."

"How do you know?"

"At the precinct, after particularly gruesome cases, they conducted psychological evaluations. I'd breezed through most, but one in particular, concerning the death of a little girl, was difficult to shake."

"Oh, Helena." Myka scoots forward and takes hold of Helena's hand. "What happened?"

"I recounted my story, albeit heavily modified, and learned about triggers. Avoiding them entirely was an acceptable solution, so the Warehouse...but you? You were a conundrum."

"I was a trigger, too." Myka slips her hand from Helena's but Helena grabs it back.

"You remained a symbol of hope, of all that was good in this world. I ached to be near you but feared disappointing you again. When you turned up in Montreal, I was drumming up the courage to approach you."

"But you weren't there yet."

"I wasn't," Helena says, squeezing Myka's hand. "Asking you to separate yourself from your home, from your calling, was difficult to justify. But after hearing of your illness, nothing else mattered but being by your side."

Helena cups Myka's jaw and strokes her cheek with a thumb. "But I must protect myself, and you, from those demons."

Helena shifts closer and guides their lips together. Their kiss lingers until Myka's phone rings.

"Artie," Myka says, answering in an instant. "We can't come. We'll keep the the book safe until someone can pick it up—"

Myka moves the phone away from her ear at Arties loud volume.

"Ok, ok! But H.G.'s not coming. Put me on a flight."

Myka places her hand over the microphone and glances at Helena. "He said Mrs. Frederic's there and 'needs it yesterday'—"

She's interrupted by Artie chiming in.

"I'm not taking a flight with two connections because it leaves tonight! Put me on a red eye."

Grumbling emanates from the other side of the phone.

"Five-thirty's fine. Send me the details."

More grumbling, then silence. Myka hangs up the phone.

"Artie seems his usual congenial self—"

"I'm really proud of you," Myka blurts, turning to face Helena again.

"Whatever for?" Helena asks, head tilting, brow furrowing.

"For fighting your demons on your own. Though I wish we'd been doing it together."

"From now on, we shall," Helena says, meeting Myka halfway as she leans in for another kiss.

Hands reach across the console, twining in hair, groping at necks, arms, shoulders, as if the space between them is too great.

Minutes later, a tap on the window jerks them apart.

"Ma'ams, bank won't open again until 9AM," a man says as Helena rolls down the window. "I'm going to have to ask to come back tomorrow."

"Bank?" Myka croaks, scanning the parking lot, eyes locking on a glowing sign at its entrance. "Oh, bank."

"Terribly sorry officer. We pulled over to take a call before becoming...distracted," Helena explains.

"Just a security guard, ma'am. But I'd appreciate it if you move on. I didn't want to disturb you but my manager's going to wonder why you were here so long."

"Nothing nefarious, I assure you. We'd have been stealthier were anything afoot," Helena says with a wink.

"Helena!"

"Just reassuring the boy."

"We didn't mean to....we were just..." Myka stumbles over a more direct explanation.

"We've been granted one more night together before our separation."

"But we do have a hotel room."

"And mere hours before I'm to deliver you to the airport."

"True." Myka's lips push together, her face contorting into one of a new understanding. "Not enough hours. We should go."

"Thank you again for accommodating us," Helena says to the security guard.

"Um, sure?" he says as Helena rolls up the window.

"We'll make this work," Myka says, slipping a hand over Helena's thigh as she drives away. "I know we can."

"I adore your enthusiasm," Helena says, covering Myka's hand with her own, threading their fingers together.

-END-

-TBC-

NOTES: A quick reminder - this Christina is the daughter of Helena's original "One" back in the 1800's - Elizabeth. I think that story is in the second installment of this series. Also note this text probably pretty rough as I'm out of town and have sporadic internet (remember DSL?) and so haven't been able to use my usual text checkers (let me know if anything's super bad!) I'm putting it up now so I won't fuss over it as I'd like to not fuss over *anything* this week. Also, the first manip is one of my favorites - there's only one I can think of that tops it, but it's not public yet (I think you'll know when you see it.) Anyway, go to shakespeareillustration.org/photographs/ to see some of the people HG mentioned. And www.livabl.com/2015/09/panorama-san-francisco-earthquake.html for some of the amazing panoramas of the SF earthquake. Also Sarah Bernhardt - look her up, she was *quite* the character.

[write-orflight]

Trouble: Chapter 2

*Gif not mine*

Pairings: HotchxReader

Prologue  Chapter 1

Rating: M

Words: 3K

Warnings: Basic witch stuff, angst, mentions of child birth, mentions of near death

Request: OPEN/CLOSED

Summary: After Haley’s passing, Aaron Hotchner has lost the light in his eyes. He seems to find it it the most unlikely of places, an occult themed coffee shop ran by a witch.

A.N: Tarot, wicca, and crystal information is very secondhand if you see any inaccuracies, no you don’t. If you are a witch tho and want to help and be nice to me enter my ask box please, I’m annoying my friend too much.

Chapter 2: God, don't let me lose my mind

The deeper into autumn you got the more busy the shop was. 

Halloween was a big money grabber for your shop. People loved to come to the shop around that time because your shop offered such ‘spooky’ feel, as the hipster who came in that morning would say. You hated that. Halloween was one of your favorite holidays simply because the veil between the natural and supernatural was so thin it was the best time for spells and charms but what you didn’t like was people and baby witches asking you about certain spells or how to commune with spirits just so they can do something “extra spooky” for whatever parties they were having for the season. Consultations were such easy money though so you’d never turn them away but your answer was always the same, that Spirits are not toys and that if they are going to invite them it better be serious and for the right intentions otherwise they might not leave. 

Despite it being your favorite season, It didn’t make you less annoyed. 

“If I have to make another Pumpkin flavored whatever and tell a sorority girl not to invoke a demon in her house, I’m going to scream.” Silena says to you as you enter the shop, Artemis in tow. Your sitter had to take an exam so you had to watch her for the first 2 hours of your shift. Artie, knowing the drill by now, tries to crawl up to the bar stool. You watch her for a second, smiling her little legs before taking pity on her and hoisting her up. She immediately pulls a coloring book and crayons out her bag, before working diligently in silence. You kiss her temple before walking behind the counter, tying your apron on. 

“You had another consultation today?” You asked.  

“Pfft, it wasn’t even that. She asked me while ordering her coffee, though I should’ve charged her for that dumbass question.” You look at her pointed, nodding your head towards your child who repeats everything. Silly winces “Sorry, but still. If this is how halloween is going to be, you’re probably going to have to do some balancing spells.” 

You rolled your eyes. “Exactly what I need, more work.” 

“What’s a dumbass?” Artie pipes up from her perch on the stool. 

“Something you are not and shouldn’t repeat unless you want your mom mad at me.” Silly says, reaching across the counter to ruffle her hair. 

The doorbell of the shop rings and the very man who’s occupied your mind these past couple of months steps in. Aaron Hotchner was one of your favorite customers despite not talking very much, he’d make small talk while you made his order which you found yourself doing slower than it would normally take you, just to get a little bit more of his time, he’d leave a tip in the jar and be on his way always leaving you with a small smile that you always immediately returned with a wide one. You tried to stop yourself from getting attached but here you were, an adult woman who had a crush on a customer who probably didn’t think about you when he left the shop. 

You’d never seen him on a weekend though and frankly you didn’t know if you could handle seeing him like this again, he wore dark blue jeans, a black belt and a black t-shirt that fit a little too well over his broad chest you couldn’t help but staring at his arms that you’d never seen on display like this. You knew for a fact(well you hoped at least) he’d have no issue picking you up or pinning you down. 

Now’s not the time, y/n… you think. 

“Hey, you.” You greet, flirtatiously. You’ve been trying not to flirt with him, you really were but sometimes you couldn’t help it. It was your personality. “Didn’t think I’d see you in here. On a weekend, no less.” 

“Yea, decided to stop for coffee before heading to my sister in law’s. Can I have my usual and an Americano for her?” He asks 

“You got it.” You wink before starting to work. Silly gives you a knowing look which you brush off. Hotch takes a seat at the bar a few seats away from your daughter who looks up at him. 

“Hi!” She says excitedly. “I’m Artie.” 

“Hi Artie, I’m Aaron.” He looks around. “Are your parents around?” You look up. You’d forgotten to mention you had a kid to Hotch, which would probably explain his confusion of a random child sitting alone. 

“My mama’s right there, silly.” She laughs. “Mama?” She says you look up automatically from the milk you’re frothing. 

“Yes, bean?” You say. 

“Can I have a brownie?”  

“Well, I don’t know. Did you finish the addition tables I asked you to do?” She shakes her head at you. “Well, how about you do that then we’ll see if it’s brownie time, deal?” She nods, fast while pulling her math homework out of her bag. Hotch watches the interaction confused but with a slight smile. 

“I didn’t know you had a kid.” He says 

“There’s a lot you don’t know about me, Gus.” You say, calling him by the nickname you affectionately gave him your first meeting. “But yes I do, that’s Artemis.” 

He nods, knowingly. “How old?” 

“Well, I don’t know. How old are you, bean?” You say. 

“I’m six!” She says, holding up 5 fingers, you grab her other hand to extend her other index finger too so the number was actually 6. 

“Really? You’re not 16 yet?” Silly asks, ruffling her hair. “I thought you were driving us home tonight?” 

Artie shakes her head. “Mama says I can’t drive yet.” 

“Between you and me kid, your mama shouldn’t be on the road either.” You swat at her. 

Aaron gives a small chuckle at the display in front of him. But he has to ask the burning question in his head. “Her dad—“ 

“Not in the picture.” You cut off. “Like not even in the same gallery.” 

Hotch nods understandably as you put his drinks in the carrier for him. He looks at you confused when you add a 3rd cup. 

“Hot chocolate.” You say. “For your son. I imagine that’s where you’re going. To pick him up from your sister?”  

“How did you know I had a son?” He asks. 

“Oh, I just used one of my witchy spells to find out information on you.” You say jokingly, but he looks at you with mild horror. “I’m kidding, Spencer told me.” 

He nods. “Thank you, y/n.” 

“No problem, come back to see me?” 

“Always.” He says, offering you a small secret smile before leaving. You can’t help the dreamy look you give his retreating back. 

“Are you coming back to earth anytime soon?” Sil says, shaking her head. “You got it bad, kid.” 

“Pfft, no I don’t.” You say turning to clean up the mess you just made. 

“I don’t understand why you just won’t ask him out.” 

“He’s healing, Sil.” You say, shrugging. “And I don’t want to push him into something he’s obviously not ready for.” 

Not to mention you also didn’t think you were ready for it. 

———————————————

On Halloween day, you get a visit from one of your favorite customers 

“Pennywise!” You say to chipper blonde women who strolled in she was wearing a orange and black dress with little jack-O-lantern earrings that you had gotten her the beginning of month. You move your hair back to show her the Ouija board pointer earrings she had gotten you in return. Penelope Garcia couldn’t just accept a gift without giving one in return. 

“Hey Y/N, how are you this ole hallow’s eve?”

“It’s Halloween and a full moon tonight.” You say excitedly. “It’s like witch Christmas.” 

“I don’t know about that but I am happy for you. Can I have a pumpkin spice latte and since I’m such a good friend an Americano with extra sugar for the good doctor?” She asks. 

“You got it, Pen.” You say before starting her order. “Heading into work now?” 

“Sure am! Hopefully there’s not a gruesome murder so I’ll be able to spend my Halloween having fun.” Penelope says. “You got any plans?” 

“Other than taking Artie Trick or Treating and charging some crystals in the full moon, no.” 

“Come on, no wild parties? no hexing beautiful men into falling in love with you?” Penny asks. You laugh loudly, shaking your head. “Man, maybe the life of a witch was more exciting in my head.” 

“Yea, you did.” You laugh. “I’m basically just a cool rock collector plus love spells, so not my thing.” 

“So there’s such a thing?” 

“Yea there’s love spells. I don’t believe in using them. I think love itself is it’s own powerful being. It shouldn’t be manipulated with, if someone was meant to love me they would.” 

“Speaking of love and love spells…” Silena pipes up from the display case she was loading pastries she just made into. “Penelope, how’s your boss?” You glare over at her. 

“Hotch?” Penny asks looking between the two of you before smirking at you. “Why do you want to know?” 

“I don’t.” You say at the same time as Silena says. “She has a Texas sized crush on him.” 

Garcia practically squeals at that. “Let me set you up please.” 

“No, Penny.” You say, immediately 

“Why not?” Her and Silly say at the same time. 

“Because… I don’t know didn’t his wife just die months ago, it’s hardly appropriate for me to try swoop in.” 

“Ex-wife. They were already long divorced before she died.” Penelope adds 

“Still! It’s not appropriate.” You say. 

“So what? You’re just going to keep making him free coffee until he realizes you're into him?” 

“Yup” you say adding the 3rd cup to Garcia’s carrier. “Give that to Grumpy for me please.” Garcia opens her mouth to say something but you just hold up your hand cutting her off 

“Fine.” She says, grabbing the carrier. “Only because I have to go to work though, this conversation isn’t over.”  

“Yes it is.” You call after her. 

——————————————

You were back in the shop. Artie was tuckered out after a long night of trick or treating and crashing from her sugar high so you decided to charge some of your crystals and do some balancing spells, knowing for a fact a lot of teenagers did stupid shit to upset the balance. 

As you were lighting the candles and incense, you heard a knock at the door. You were long closed so who could possibly need something right now? You look out the window and Aaron is standing there. You’re confused but you let him in anyway. 

“Hey Grumpy, what’re you doing here?” 

“I’m sorry I didn’t know you were closed, I guess I’ve never been here at night. I’ll go. I'm sorry for bothering you.” He says turns to go but you grab his arm to stop him. 

“Gus… it’s almost midnight, no business is open. You’re here because there’s obviously something upsetting you so I’m not just going to let you leave.” You all but push him into barstool. “Now like I said it’s almost midnight so there is something important I need to do so if you’ll sit tight for like 2 minutes, I’ll make us coffee.” 

Hotch obliges, sitting silently watching you as you lit some candles on the altar you kept in the shop. You placed the honey cake you had made earlier in the day on the altar before whispering. 

“Thank you to the patron, Artemis, Great goddess of Moon and Magic. Mistress of deer and owl. Be thou my guide and Inspiration. Teach me Thy mysteries and lead me in thy ways.” You stand and turn back to Hotch who is watching you intensely. “Sorry about that, midnight is her favorite time. Coffee?” You ask, He nods as you move behind the counter. 

“Can I ask what it is you just did?” Hotch ask. 

“That?” He nods. “It’s a full moon so since Artemis is my patron goddess, it’s best to leave a sacrifice to stay in her favor.” You shrug. He looks at you like you're crazy but you're used to that look. “Don’t look at me like that, it’s no different then some catholic practices. In fact, Christians often stole from pagan practices, and only one is just considered ‘taboo’ now.” 

“Is that why you named your child Artemis, because she’s your Patron?” He asks. 

“Actually, Artemis is my Patron because of Artie.” You say, he looks at you as if asking you to continue. “I wasn’t always like this.” You say gesturing to yourself and the shop. “My parents are pastors and for a long time I was this faith devout christian girl. But I got pregnant out of wedlock, my parents disowned me and I was looking for something to turn to. I met Silena and she introduced me to Wicca, and said whoever my Patron was through meditation and study, They’ll reveal themselves to me. So I went months, meditating daily, and still nothing was working. Then I went into labor, and everything was going wrong. I thought, this was my punishment from god for not only getting pregnant without marriage but turning to witchcraft. I had to have an emergency C-section. And when I was on the operating table, I almost died, Artie almost died. I started to see these images of deer and boar running through the forest. And finally when I came back to, and I could hear my baby crying, the first thing I saw when my eyes opened was the full moon out the window.” You sigh, sliding a cup to Hotch before moving from behind the counter to take a seat next to him. “That’s when I realized the goddess had saved me and my child. And while Artemis prefers virgin patronage, and that ship had long sailed past back then. I figured naming my child after her was the next best thing.”  

“That’s a beautiful story, Y/N.” He says, looking at you sincerely.   

“Thank you, and since you’re not running for the hills, why don’t you tell me why you really knocked at my door at midnight.” 

“It’s just…” He starts, clearing his throat. “Tonight was the first ‘major’ holiday without Haley. And I tried to take Jack’s mind off it, make it fun but it was like this looming weight above us. That it wasn’t the same without her and that it never would be. And I was upset and just wanted to take a walk but I guess my feet carried me here.” He shrugged. 

“Well I’m glad you’re here grumpy. And you’re healing you need to give yourself time--” 

“I don’t have time!” He snaps. You flinch back a bit, having never heard his raised voice. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to yell. It’s just-I don’t have time to heal. I have to be there for Jack.”

“Who’s there for you, Aaron?” You ask. He looks at you confused. You hardly ever call him by his name. It's either grumpy or gus or a combination of the two. Never by his actual name, he hated how much he liked how it sounded coming from your lips. “Do you know what a rock tumbler is?” you ask, he shakes his head confused where you’re going with this. You run behind the counter to retrieve the box you had dug through the very first night you met.

“Well a rock tumbler is a device you put rocks into. Rocks that have eroded, rocks that have trekked the earth, rocks that have been to hell and back. And what you do is you put them in this device with a little bit of water and you wait. Days, weeks, months all the while this device is just spinning, you don’t see what’s happening on the inside but after a while, when the time is right, you get these beautiful lustrous stones.” You say, showing him the box. “Healing is the same way, others don’t see you working. But in the end, they’ll see the result. And you’ll feel the result too. But if you don’t take that step you don’t end up with gems like these. You just end up with an eroded dingy rock.” You look up at Hotch and he’s tearing up slightly. Your heart melts. “Do you want a hug?” you say. 

“You don’t have to--” 

You cut him off. “No one on earth gives hugs because they have to. I want to give you a hug if you want one. So do you want a hug?” 

He nods, fastly. So you stand, he follows suit and allows you to pull him down into a full embrace. Your arms around his neck and shoulders, he envelopes you fully into his torso, arms tight around your waist. You sigh, content. Before shaking yourself out of it. This wasn’t about you. No matter how right it felt. 

After a minute or so you break apart. You look him in the eyes and he’s staring back at you in what feels like admiration. You clear your throat. “Can I give you something?” you ask.

“Is it another crystal?” He asked back. 

“Yes, it is.” You rummage through the box before pulling out the one you needed. “This is Aragonite, it’s good for healing old wounds and building emotional strength. Now I can gift you this but you have to activate it yourself. Even if you don’t believe it, I feel like it’s good words to hear yourself say anyway.” You grab his left hand, sliding the crystal into it. He looks into your eyes. “Now say, I release past wounds and embrace resilience.” 

Hotch sighs. “I release past wounds and embrace resilience.” He then slides the stone in his pocket. Before grabbing your hand again. “Thank you, Y/N” 

“Anytime, Grumpy.” You say.  

Taglist: @megatrexus @roses-and-grasses​ @tittymuncher69​ @liaabsurd​ @ladyravenclaw​ @genevievedarcygrangerreading​ @softbibxtch​ @xxdisappearwithoutatracexx​

[ads-whatif]

↪ Have you heard about TINA COHEN-CHANG? SHE is 29 and hails from LIMA, OHIO. Looks exactly like JENNA USHKOWITZ, and is OPEN.

“I am a powerful woman, and my growing feminism will cut you in half like the righteous blade of equality.”

↪ IMPORTANT INFORMATION:

FULL NAME: Up to RPer DATE OF BIRTH: Up to RPer SEXUALITY & GENDER: Up to RPer RELATIONSHIP STATUS: Single POSITIVE & NEGATIVE TRAITS: Up to RPer OCCUPATION: Up to RPer CITY: New York, NYC

↪ HEADCANONS:

Tina was always a very awkward outside and very shy. She always did her best to stay under the radar of everyone else around her, whether it be social or academic. She was always so scared of being noticed that when she was still very young, she faked a stutter to help her not doing any oral presentation. As soon as she realized that the stutter was working with the school work, she decided to use that to help her protect herself from having interaction with anyone who she was not comfortable with. But, she found out that singing was a very good activity to help her out of her shell, and when she did sing, she wouldn’t even need to stutter and pretend to be someone who she was not. She would totally transform herself whenever she sang.

As soon as she joined Glee Club, Tina started to slowly relax and let her defenses down, and that was when she finally started to form new friendships and even relationships. After that, she was able to overcome her anxiety and she admitted that yes, she was faking her stutter. Tina became bolder and much more open about her feelings. But, deep down, she has personal insecurities like any other human being. She still feels like she is never good enough for her partners, she is always scared that they will end up cheating on her. That is still the only little thing she can’t change about her. She is not confident enough, yet.

After the chance Tina had in her senior year of high school to sing hung Up in the diva week in Glee club, she saw herself become slightly more confident in her performing and she soon realized it was something she wanted, originally she thought performing would just be high school and when she graduated she would never want to perform again but she was deceived, she knew that’s what she wanted to do, she wanted to go into performing.

Around the time when Tina graduated high school, her successful application and audition to NYADA, she got into a school in New York, she was worried at first that she would be in the shadow of Rachel again but that was wrong. She loved it and New York became home to her and she has loved it since and she is aiming to be a performer on the stage at some point soon.

↪ IMPORTANT CONNECTIONS:

MRS. & MR. COHEN-CHANG (Adopted Parents): Nothing to Mention. MAX COHEN-CHANG (Adopted Brother): Nothing to Mention. MIKE CHANG (Ex-Boyfriend): Their relationship started after Tina and Artie break up. During a summer break, they started to have feelings for one another, while they were at an Asian Camp, taking care of a few children, and as soon as school started again, Tina told everything to Artie, and that was how Mike and Tina became official. They involved quickly, and Tina gave her virginity to him, just showing how madly in love she was with him. But, during Mike’s senior year, things got a little hard for both of them, fights started to happen all the time, and their love was not as strong as they thought it would be and they broke up. And no matter how many times they tried to get back together, their relationship never worked as they thought it would work. Now, they are just close friends. ARTIE ABRAMS (Ex-Boyfriend): Artie and Tina started dating after they graduated high school and whilst they were in New York together. Unfortunately a while into it all, Artie got sick and it became too much for Tina to deal with and to focus on her future and being there to look after Artie that she chose to break up with him. She still cares for him deeply and will remain to be there for him if he needed someone. RACHEL BERRY & MERCEDES JONES (Best Friends): If you’d have told shy stuttering Tina when she joined glee club that years later, her best friends and two of the few people she had on speed dial would be the loud erratic Jewish girl and the sassy black girl who was only really there to park and bark, she would never have believed you. But Mercedes and Rachel are two of her closest friends. Despite all of the jealousy and arguing the three had been through during their high school years, they’re still her girls and she loves them wholeheartedly. BLAINE ANDERSON (Best Friend & Platonic Soulmate): Look, Tina knows her crush on Blaine in her senior year was embarrassing, and she can only look back on it and cringe. But Blaine was there for her when she needed him the most. Going through breakups around the same time was hard, but it pulled them together and they became each other’s emotional crutch. Now that Blaine is a parent, Tina’s adopted the role of auntie to his little one, and they’re still as close as ever.

                  Welcome! What If is waiting for you!

[signed-yours-truly-the-whale]

Thoughts/Observations on Joker, part 1

AKA I Spent 7 Hours on This, I Will Die if it Gets Less Than Three Notes

I could rave for hours about this movie’s cinematography. Literal hours.

Nobody talks enough about Arthur’s full-fledged dedication to his clown craft. Man is working 60+ hours a week and does not break a sweat. I also fucking love this clowny face he pulls here. The first shot we see of Arthur in full. Holy shit is it beautiful. God bless Joaquin Phoenix.

These two shots together are incredibly important to me. In a split-second we see Arthur’s disbelief that he cannot control the whirlwind of emotions inside of his own head, not even being able to produce a smile, and then his resignation because it’s just another day. Heartbreaking.

Awwww shiiiiit

Gotham City is such a dump but I’d be bullshitting myself if I said I didn’t love the grimy aesthetic of it. It’s technicolor trash.

Arthur loves his job so much. He genuinely enjoys being Carnival. That hurts a lot to think about in hindsight.

This man just got his ass handed to him and he is STILL SPRAYING THE FAKE FLOWER ON HIS VEST

YOU WANNA TALK ABOUT DEDICATION

This opening card is so imposing. Not only does it take up the entire screen to the point of running off the edges, but it’s shielding Arthur from view. Arthur is invisible in light of Joker in Arthur’s own movie.

I screenshotted this by accident but I felt a need to put it here because he’s just so adorable. Even right before an episode.

E y e s s s s s

E Y E S S S S S

I desperately want to know what got Arthur sent to Arkham the first time. A suicide attempt? A public breakdown? I really want fanfics of it.

There’s a really, really good fanfiction on AO3 by Arthur_Fleck about Arthur slowly recovering and meeting a girl called In the Major and Minor Arcana

I highly, highly recommend it

Okay. Joaquin’s immersion into his characters -- all of them -- is absolutely incredible. But Arthur is just ... off the charts, man. No two of his characters are the same and he embeds himself so deeply in their skin, but Joaquin buried himself so deeply into Arthur’s brain that it is so hard for me to see any of Joaquin at all. God, he’s incredible and this shot makes me emotional because this just is Arthur.

ARTHUR WOULD BE A GREAT DAD AND I DO NOT ACCEPT ARGUMENTS

It really speaks to how shitty Gotham is that this man is having a full-fledged screaming/laughing breakdown on the bus and nobody is batting an eye

I adore how the cinematography paints Arthur as so small to his own environment. He’s a speck of dust. A fleck.

Babie is wincing :((((

I have been trying to figure out the layout of this apartment for months and my inability to, even with a floor plan, is driving me insane

I just found out that the Budweiser beer jingle Here Comes the King is on the soundtrack and plays when Arthur comes home and that made me go feral

I  A M  M U R R A Y , K I N G  O F  A S S H O L E S

It is second nature for me to do this stupid pose every time I watch this scene

Arthur blending into the crowd here makes me ... so happy. He looks so happy.

This is Arthur’s best laugh of the movie, fuck you. I am incredulous that I was the only person laughing when I saw this in the theater opening night.

This is one of the few moments I really see Joaquin shine through Arthur. I don’t know why, but this lighting and his voice and his intensity gives me visceral flashbacks to watching a little boy Joaquin in Parenthood. God, I love this man.

It really is a testament to Penny’s (lack of) parenting that Arthur is day dreaming about receiving affection and validation from a parent figure when his own mother is literally right there

GOD DAMN THIS MAN IS GORGEOUS

But also big bruise :(

Yes, I shall trust you, man named Randall smiling down at me in low angle light

Why was Hoyt not informed that Arthur got his ass beat on the job? As Arthur’s employer he should’ve literally been the first person to know so he could make a note of it. Either he wasn’t told or he gave so little of a fuck that his consciousness astral projected to another plane of existence while he shoved the white powder down his throat and forgot Arthur existed at all.

Literally fuck Hoyt. I hate him even more that his office is the coolest shit in the world

ARTHUR KNOWS THE CUSTOMER SERVICE SMILE

Joaquin dislocated his knee in this scene, the poor boy

I could write a full damn essay about why the misleading advertising of Sophie as a prominent character was the greatest twist of the whole movie. Literally I am still speechless how the movie did that.

I am not kidding when I say my sister has this same color scheme in the bathroom of our house and realizing that made me werewolf

Also Arthur being the son Penny doesn’t deserve warms and breaks my heart

The complete lack of reaction to Penny’s “Don’t you have to be funny to be a comedian” makes me laugh and cry internally

This shot? Gorgeous. His face? Deadly. That jawline? Cutting diamonds. Hotel? Trivago.

I really, really want a Joker 2, but at the same time I do not want a Joker 2 because Joaquin Phoenix has a baby who needs him now and he cannot be pulling shit like losing 52 lbs for a role

Also I REALLY need to discuss how much this brass ballet reminds me so heavily of Buffalo Bill from Silence of the Lambs. Holy fuck, I got actually chills in the theater

Like holy fuck

And then this shot reminds me so heavily of the opening of Fedddy vs Jason with Freddy Krueger laughing over his newspaper collage of missing children. Holy fuck I love this cinematography.

Guys. G - Guys, his name tag says Dr. Carnival, can you hear me  s o b b i n g

This part is so Chaplinesque, the way he slides the gun into his coat again

These children look so afraid of him for dropping the gun and wowie, does that really hurt

Was this asshole supposed to be modeled after Eric Trump? Because I get really douchebaggy Eric Trump vibes (minus the jacked teeth) from this ringleader

I don’t have much to say here except I am in love with the way Artie’s hair sticks straight up in bottle curls when the clown wig slides off

Also if you decide it’s a good idea to mess with a man dressed as a clown laughing maniacally on the subway of one of the most dangerous cities in the world, you are asking him to shoot you and I will not feel sorry for you

I will never not be in love with this image. I fell in love with it in the teaser trailer and almost went feral in the middle of the mall when I saw this was the poster they used to advertise the movie with. My friend described this movie as “chaos, beautified,” and nothing sums it up as well as this picture.

JOAQUIN AND TODD MADE THIS ENTIRE SEQUENCE UP AND I AM IN LOVE

Hello, handsome

[skellebonez]

Starrosefics, asking 17 for Lewvithur, 25 for Traffic Light Trio, and both 3 and 4 for Spicynoodleshipping

While the last fill takes cues from Rainy Talks, I am considering it side fun that doesn’t actually take place in the AU.

“I’m saying this out of love… but that looks horrendous.”

Arthur looked at Lewis incredulously. “It doesn’t look THAT bad.”

“Yeah, Artie, it kinda does,” Vivi agreed with a smile as she sat down next to him. “Own the weirdness man.” She grabbed a slice off of Arthur’s plate. “But savor the flavor at the same time.”

Lewis groaned, glad he was a ghost and therefore could not physically turn green as he watched them both eat a slice of chocolate and cheese pizza.

“My parents can never know the horrors of what you two eat.”

“Fair.” “Understandable.”

----------

“Do you trust me?” “Who are you, Aladdin?”

This was… bad. There was no other way to put it, this situation was bad. MK’s staff was nowhere to be found, Mei was injured, and the three of them were trapped in on a rock in the ocean with land just barely in sight. At the very least they knew Mei would be alright, but in her condition she wasn’t in any shape to do much of anything except exist and wish she healed faster (they could really use a dragon right now but Red knew that was exactly why she was targeted more than they were and he would be sure to help her give her wounds back two fold when they find the demon who stranded them).

“Alright… well,” Red Son started, measuring the distance they would have to travel to reach solid ground in his head. “We have 3 options. We either try to swim for shore, we wait 5 more minutes for high tide for force us to swim for shore… or…”

“Or what?” MK asked, keeping Mei standing as best he could on the wet rock as his eyes remained lit with gold to search the ocean for his staff. He didn’t seem to be having much luck on the later front.

“Do you trust me?”

“Who are you, Aladdin?” Mei asked incredulously, slumping over more to raise an eyebrow at Red Son nearly upside down. “Of course we trust you, whatever it is if it will get us to shore asap then I say do it!”

“Yeah, what she said!” MK chipped in, eyes returning to normal as he deemed his search fruitless.

“OK, just don’t say I didn’t try to warn.” Red Son closed his eyes and concentrated for a moment. It had been some time since he had done this with another person, but soon enough his hair flared up. MK and Mei yelled as fire surrounded the trio in a whirlwind, their hair and clothes whipping wildly and a strangely warm but not hit heat surrounded them, it almost felt like the ground molded under their feet and…

They were suddenly on a very dry and sandy beach, Red Son having successfully transported them over the oceanic distance.

“That was awesooooome…” MK gasped out.

“YOU WERE USING TELEPORTING MAGIC THE WHOLE TIME!?” Mei screamed in awe.

“What?” Red brushed some sand off his coat and moved to fix his companions’ hair from their faces. “You didn’t think I had been turning into fire every time I did that, did you?”

----------

“You look adorable in- wait is that my shirt?”/“Marry me. Now.”

The sun was just starting to set and Pigsy’s was closing early for reasons the older man refused to explain to MK, so he made his way back up to his apartment in eager anticipation. Red Son had come home (home, that was a new concept to them both still) earlier than he had, barely able to yell a hello into the shop before the rush pushed him away, and was waiting for him to get off work and all MK wanted to do was watch the newest Monkey King series together.

When he entered the apartment he saw Red standing and fiddling with something on his desk. It was a rare day when he saw the demon wearing more casual clothes, the white t-shirt standing out and yet matching his normal pants well. He wondered when the other had bought himself new clothes.

“You look adorable in- wait is that my shirt?” When Red Son flipped around he saw the tell tale target of his signature shirt staring back at him.

“UH…” Red Son stares off to the side and MK realized the other had also clearly been wearing a hat of some kind. His hair was frizzy and flattened at weird angles and he also had clearly poorly removed make up over his scar and was missing his sunglasses. “I… uh… borrowed it to go into town.”

Ah, that explained that. While Red COULD have just gone wherever he wanted in theory, the idea of one of his old Bull Clones spotting him and reporting his location to his parents was a sore subject for the demon. That, and while people normally just ignored him there were still more than a few people around who would recognize him at the Demon Bull King’s son and give him a hard time.

“Aw, I wish I’d gotten to see your whole outfit,” MK said casually in hopes of making the topic less heavy for his boyfriend. “Like I was going to say, you look adorable in a t-shirt.”

“Yes, well,” Red’s eyes moved from side to side, clearly not wanting to make eye contact with MK. That was… odd. “I’m glad you think that. But, uh. I. Got something for you. Because… well, I know humans don’t really celebrate this sort of thing, but tomorrow makes one year after we first talked in the gazebo and… I wanted to get you a present. For. Reasons.”

The poor demon’s speech was awkward and stilted and he was more nervous than MK had seen him in a long while. As he moved to the side MK could finally see what Red had been fiddling with on his desk.

It was a figurine. A very expensive looking figurine of the Monkey King himself AND MK, standing back to back in fighting stances.

“I-I had it custom made so if it’s too mu-”

“Marry me. Now.”

“HUH!?”

[freddyfreebat]

Introducing the cast of Luca Guadagnino’s We Are Who We Are

arti­cle tak­en from The Face vol­ume 4 issue 004 

We Are Who We Are follows a group of kids growing up on an Italian army base. The début TV series by Call Me By Your Name director Luca Guadagnino is a show unlike any you’ve seen before: a teenage snapshot of fucking and fighting, with all the internal tugs of war that make us who we are. Meet the cast, before the whole world falls for them.

Around 2013, film director Luca Guadagnino met the actor Amy Adams to discuss working together on one of the dozens of projects the director had in the incubator. Adams happened to mention that she’d grown up on a US military base in Vicenza, Italy, which sowed the seed in his mind of telling the story of a micro-America – a petri dish of patriotism – hidden in plain sight in his native country. 

WRWWR is the result – a drone’s‑eye view of American culture which follows six kids and their families living and working on an army base. As their parents (two of whom are played by Chloë Sevigny and Kid Cudi) wade through their own problems, the kids are cut loose to grow up. They straddle a culture that isn’t their own, eating Cinnamon Toast Crunch in the mess hall while surrounded by some of the world’s best food. They fuck, they sing, they splash one another at the beach and in pools, edging ever closer to discovering who they truly are.

The concept of coming-of-age is one Guadagnino has explored in his films Call Me By Your Name and his remake of Suspiria, but he didn’t just want to tell a story about youth for youth’s sake. It made more sense to place his first HBO series against a backdrop of political turmoil, so he set it during the 2016 US presidential election, creating an eight-part experiment in jingoism.

This is what happens when you tell a European arthouse director to sift through American youth culture, to see a torrid landscape through the eyes of those who have not truly felt its ramifications – young outsiders who don’t even understand themselves yet. We are who we are, Guadagnino proposes simply in the show’s title, but who that is, is up for you to decide.

Jack Dylan Grazer

Age: 17

Character: Fraser is the newcomer on the army base. He loves to stare for much longer than appropriate and can entertain himself just as easily as he can be the class clown.

Sucking on a pregnant Chloë Sevigny’s fingers like they’re pork knuckles might not have been what Jack Dylan Grazer had in mind when he was cast as Fraser, the male lead in WRWWR. Yet it didn’t faze Sevigny at all, who plays his character’s mother. Pre-finger-suck, Grazer could think only of the 1979 Bernardo BertoluccI film La Luna, in which a mother masturbates her own son.

“We were preparing for that scene and it was all I could think about,” he tells me from his Los Angeles bedroom. Five seconds before the cameras started rolling, Guadagnino asked him if he had seen La Luna? ​“I was like, ​‘Oh my God, no way, I was just about to ask you that!’ I swear to God, it was so synchronistic.”

The relationship between Fraser and his mum is ​“beautifully disturbing and gross”, as Grazer puts it. He gets jealous when she dances with a male friend, and brutally slaps her when she doesn’t prepare his meal the way he likes. ​“I felt baaaaad!” Grazer jokes. ​“It was real – a practical slap. Luca was like, ​‘Chloë, do you want to make it a real slap like the Bertolucci movie, or do you want to play it fake?’ Chloë was like, ​‘Let’s do it for real.’”

After each take Grazer would ask, ​“Are you OK, Chloë? Do you want me to get you some ice?”, feeling bad for slapping one of cinema’s most iconic indie actresses. She responded, as you might guess, by shushing him.

When we first meet Fraser in WRWWR he has no friends but shoots lingering stares at a group of young teens who live on his same army base, a group headed up by Britney (Francesca Scorsese). He is ​“universally relatable… the embodiment of questioning who you are”, Grazer says. ​“I was really drawn to how blatant he was in regards to transitioning from childhood to adolescence.”

Grazer has previously been in the films IT and Beautiful Boy (where he played a younger Timothée Chalamet), but this is his best role to date. Fraser short-circuits with awkward energy and walks with a confident gait that suggests – as his new friend Britney says behind his back – ​“he’s got a big one”.

Grazer is, at age 17, the most experienced of the younger set on WRWWR, but he still had to fight to win his part. ​“I auditioned like everyone else. “I hated my audition, I thought it was the worst audition I’d ever done in my life. I walked out and I was like, ​‘Fuck!’ because I wanted to get it so bad. I was in Chicago, and Luca FaceTimed me like, ​‘If you want the part, you can have it.’ I was like, ​‘If I want it?! Yeah! I want it!’”

Part of that audition process required him to answer some personal questions for casting director Carmen Cuba. She asked if he’d ever questioned his sexuality. ​“I was like, ​‘Of course, as every human being should.’ She said, ​‘This show has a lot to do with teenage identity, so are you in touch with that side of yourself? Do you wanna explore it more?’” He did.

As Fraser, Grazer goes to great lengths to keep you hemmed to your seat, talking to real Italian strangers caught on camera, or sticking his fingers in a cake – not because it’s in the script (he did several things without Guadagnino asking), but because it’s who he believes his character is. ​“I don’t act for my fans,” Grazer admits. ​“I act in movies because I want people who don’t even know who I am to be like, ​‘Oh cool. Who’s this guy? He’s good.’”

Before WRWWR Grazer didn’t think much about fashion, but in the show his character loves Raf Simons. To make him more enthused Guadagnino connected him with an unlikely close friend: the streetwear influencer Mike the Ruler. ​“Before, I was like, ​‘Ew, fashion – fucking assholes always trying to show off.’ I talked to Mike and he was like, ​‘Fashion isn’t about showing off how much money I have. It’s the opposite, I’m dressing up for myself, it’s my own artform.’” Just the other day, Grazer says, he stepped out in a skirt, a ​“really obnoxious” yellow sweater, a corduroy vest and a neon sun hat. He likes the fact that people look at him funny.

Grazer loves being the grub twisting in Hollywood’s apple, but more than pleasing his millions of fans or aiming for top-billing, he is taking difficult roles to flex his muscles. ​“I just want to express myself, and if people like that, that’s awesome.”

[fucker-anon]

Bloody Painter Headcanons

am i gonna write about helen even tho no one cares? fUCK YEA @creepy-bi-day hope you enjoy. Im still not a writer sorry :/. also my personal hcs, its okay to disagree. Also dark themes again. 

Bloody Painter

Backstory:

was born on Oct 1st, 1980, fully name Helen Otis

mother is white, father is Japanese

is an only child. Helen’s parents had a very difficult time in getting pregnant like yeeeaaars (10 ish) and they also really wanted a girl. Like in their head, they would be getting a girl. and when they did get pregnant the ultra scan did show a girl. so they were in shock when a boy popped out. 

they no likely. Since helen’s mom was a teacher, they decided to raise the boy as a girl and simply homeschool them until they had to go to college, once there they could simply transition into a girl. This is how they thought trans people were so they thought they’ll do the same to get a girl (This was obliviously wrong)

so they tried to do that but mother couldn’t get the needed forms and paperwork to homeschool Helen so they had to go to school. so their parents decided the best thing to do was to make them as manly as possible in 6 months. so everything pink and girl (lots of which were comfort items like plushies, and art things) were thrown out in front of poor 6 year old Helen who didn’t understand what was happening. Helen couldn’t do art, couldn’t wear certain clothes, couldn’t say certain things. punishments weren’t physical but there was a lot of yelling.

around the 3 month before school started, their parents decided that maybe Helen should meet their grandparents (parents kept giving excuses why they couldn’t visit). everything was going swell until the grandparents on the father’s side asked why name their BOY a GIRL name. before the parents could say anything, helen said “cause im a girl?” ... yaaaa queerphobic grandparents and little helen didn’t get along. plus helen was white passing so asian grandparents blamed their mom.

parents cut contact with the grandparents, and yelled at helen a lot. (poor bby) this mental abuse continued over 3 months and caused helen to stop talking and start repressing a lot of his feeling which his parents encouraged cause “”bOYs donT hAve fEeLinGs””

in school, the parents told the teacher that there was a mix up when filling out his name and that they should call him Otis. Of course one teacher messed up and called him Helen, and then they got a lot of comments form their peers, but they learned not to say that they were a girl at this point. 

helen was lightly bullied for his name, and when they tried to tell a teacher they were told to “man up :))” 

and so more repressing feelings

it wasn’t until middle school where someone (a kid who they later learned was named tom), stole and planted a watch of another girl into helen’s bag. This meant helen’s bullying got a lot worse. Before it was a comment here or there, now it was physical and a lot often. this is also when he began to develop symptoms of anxiety and depression.

he slowly became friends with Tom, who was also bullied a lot. But one day Tom took Helen to the roof where Tom confessed into planting the watch. Helen was very upset, and the two started to argue when Tom slipped off the edge, Helen tried to hold on to Tom, but Tom let go of his hand. Tom dead.

there was an investigation done, and Helen wasn’t in trouble as some students and teachers said how they saw him hold onto Tom. The school was given a speech about how bullying was bad, and tried to get things back to normal. Helen’s bully did die down, tho lots of ppl tried to spread rumors about how he pushed Tom. 

his parents were more upset over how this would look and not about Helen’s mental health. Helen never told them about the bulling. 

When high school started, the bullies acted as if nothing happened. and on Halloween, Helen snapped and killed 5 of the main bullies. He was caught and sent to a mental hospital. 

so you think that finally, Helen can get the help they need right :)). ahhah no....

so the hospital did diagnose Helen with depression and a mild case of anxiety, but basically put them on pills. the actually therapist had a very hard time getting Helen to open up. this is because the on their first session helen started with his gender identity, and the therapist told him “look you are biologically a boy, so you must be a boy :))” and when they said that sometimes he felt more comfortable when they were more fem, they was told that was wrong. 

so helen shut up like a clam cause they did not feel safe with this guy

at least they learned how to somewhat manage their depression and anxiety :)

once helen turned 18 he was released, and Helen decided to be an artist and not kill. but he saw another one of his bullies and said fuck it.

slender saw and was like “i like this child. imma adopt them”

and Helen joined the mansion

Personality:

look Helen was mocked and betrayed by basically every person in their life, they don’t trust ppl

they are nice, but they don’t new people

if you’re nice they’ll be nice, if you’re mean they’ll be mean, simple

cold hearted, look if you are neutral to them and get run over by car they wont do anything. the world was shit to them, they’re shit back.

quiet. like Helen could be inches away and you still won’t hear them

buttttt if you get close (good luck) you see a passionate, kinda nerdy, very kinda touch starved, sarcastic person who just lived a shitty life. 

Fun Facts:

k mans has a 6 inch dick, 7 when hard, but is thick, and stretches you out-

*cough* moving on-

bi sexual. Helen has a very hard time acknowledging romantic feelings but is down to date the girls, gays and theys. again good luck getting there but it may happen.

gender fluid Helen has come a long way and their gender identity has ranged from girl, boy, both, none and yes. They’ve settled on gender-neutral pronouns but doesn’t hate being called she/her or he/him usually. On a bad day, they can’t say the same. 

Called them painter. The only ppl who can called them by their birth names are ppl who are close to them. On fem days, they like Helen. On masc days, they like Otis. Sometimes they don’t care, sometimes they just wanna be called painter. If you’re not sure and you actually care just ask, he’ll say what day it is. usually they dress accordingly, but still if you’re not sure ask, they’ll prefer it.

Speaking of clothes, the fit??? is on point???? like imagine dark academia with more blues, blacks and tans. Helen looks like the protagonist of a boarding school au.

they will wear skirt and dresses and corsets, and do they’re (slightly basic) hair and makeup.

some creeps (jeff) tried to make fun of helen for this. And when you look at Helen you dont think that they’re much of a fight. Helen’s lean and kinda thin (kid doesn’t eat a lot), but Helen did karate for year cause their dad wanted their “perfectly normal son” to do something manly and kinda close to their culture. Helen learned how to fight with a very good guard and how to be very fast but not so much strong. Wasn’t until he got out of the mental hospital did he learn about pressure points, specially those that dont need a lot pressure :) you see where this is going. 

Basically Helen is that one movie character who touches a spot on someone's neck and they pass out. (this is the best i can describe it, they dont do this exactly but similar things) 

also very talented at art and arty things. like annoyingly good. he’ll try wood craving and make amazing things after only learning about it an hour ago. Current draws online and does online commissions to pay for his coffee

actually likes hunting, not with gun but with like bows an arrows. they dont hunt often cause they like animals

has to finish whatever they’re working on. please force this baby into bed

has a coffee addiction

likes classical music and lofi. 

dont talk about the whole painting with blood thing, they were 14, it was cringey, they know

hair is like chin length ish, its black with waves, so if they wanna be masc they can tie it up and when its fem, they can let it down and straighten it 

forgets to eat, feed them

k this is long. As you can see I can also write a whole essay about Helen. I will write about Helen’s and Johnny friendship, along with the other creeps later. but im tired.