hold my hand. -k.sm 💌
❀┆pairing : kim seungmin x fem!reader ͏
❀┆ info : oneshot / twoshot ?? , a lot of fluff , and a lot of 'apparent' unrequited love (im sorry) , happy ending , cutesy , uni love , feelings and angst , short !
❀┆ personas + bg : uni students ; dormmates w benefits
❀┆ word count :
❀┆warnings : cute and dread but dw happy ending yall
notes at the end !!
✿ ( ˶ᵔ ᵔ) ♡ ˚ ☒
happy seungmo day !
♥︎ ! now, we share the same dream called, 'us'.
The night was thick with the kind of silence that made every little sound feel magnified. The rustling of her sheets, the faint crack of his breathing, even the soft creaks of the bed beneath her felt louder than the thoughts swirling around in her restless head.
She turned over again for what felt like the hundredth time, face buried in her pillow as she tried to will herself to fall asleep.
But her mind was wide awake, racing in that frustrating way it did sometimes, hopping from one thought to the next with no intention of slowing down. The warmth from the body beside her, instead of comforting you into rest, only added to your awareness.
He lay still, his back rising and falling gently in rhythm. His arm, usually flung over her waist, had fallen away sometime in the night, giving her space, but her squirming was testing the limits of even his patience.
A loud sigh slipped out, unintentional but filled with the kind of frustration she only felt when she’s tired, and can't do anything about it.
She felt movement before she heard him, the mattress dipping slightly as he shifted beside her. “Y/n,” he mumbled, his voice low and hoarse, dripping with sleep. "What are you doing?"
Startled, she froze. She hadn't meant to wake him.
He really didn’t wake easily, so the fact that he was up meant she’d been tossing and turning for a while.
"Sorry," she muttered, feeling a wave of guilt wash over her as she turned on her side to face him. The dim light filtering through the window barely illuminated his face, but she could make out the mess of his hair and the way his eyes, barely open, squinted in her direction.
"Seriously," he continued, rubbing his hand over his face before letting it drop lazily on his bare chest, his voice thick with sleep. "Why are you moving so much?"
She shifted uncomfortably under his gaze, biting her lip. "I can't sleep," she admitted quietly.
It was a stupid response, one that obviously didn’t explain why she was writhing like a fish out of water, but it was the truth. She just couldn’t sleep.
He blinked at her, clearly processing her words through his sleepy haze.
Then, to her surprise, he shifted closer to her. His arm reached out, wrapping lazily around her waist, over the thin, black camisole she wore, as he tugged her towards him, pulling her into the familiar space against his chest.
"Then just stop moving," he murmured, his voice muffled by her hair as his lips brushed against the top of her head.
He wasn’t fully awake, that was clear.
This was Seungmin in his most unfiltered state, without the usual layers of sarcasm or that teasing grin he wore during the day.
This was him in a space where he let her in more than either of them were willing to admit out loud.
His body was warm, radiating heat in a way that made her immediately feel guilty for disturbing him. His fingers, though a little clumsy with sleep, rubbed slow, lazy circles against her back.
The motion was surprisingly soothing. She let out a long breath, slowly sinking into him as her muscles began to relax.
"You’re restless," He murmured after a few seconds, his hand still moving against her back in that gentle way, keeping her anchored against him. His lips brushed the top of her head again, a ghost of a kiss that she wasn’t sure he even knew he gave.
"Always overthinking."
She felt her chest tighten at his words. He knew her too well. And maybe that was why it was so terrifying—the way he could see through her, even in his half-asleep state.
But at the same time, it was why she kept coming back, why she never left his bed after nights like these. He knew her, and despite that, he stayed.
"I’m not overthinking," She mumbled, but the words lacked conviction. He let out a small scoff that vibrated against her forehead, assuring her that he was definitely conscious yet sleepy. Cute.
"Sure," he muttered, but his tone was softer now, less teasing, more understanding. His hand slid from her back to beneath her the fabric that hugged her waist, fingers tracing mindless patterns across her skin.
"Just... try to sleep."
"That’s exactly what i’ve been doing for the past—"
"Shush."
At his lazy voice and his hand slowly prompting her figure, she nestled deeper into him, her body naturally curling against his, her cheek resting against his collarbone.
He smelled like the faint traces of his vanilla scented cologne mixed with warmth—Seungmin’s warmth, something uniquely his that made her eyelids feel heavier.
"Close your eyes, and don’t focus on anything other than sleeping."
"I’ll sleep if you stop talking,"
He let out a quiet, annoyed breath, his grip on her waist tightening just a fraction, pulling her closer to him.
"You’ll sleep," he replied simply, his voice now barely above a whisper.
His body was comfortable, solid against hers, and his steady breathing began to lull her in ways her own mind couldn’t.
The itch to move, to toss and turn, slowly began to fade as his fingers danced across her clothed waist, occasionally slipping under the hem of the same camisole once again to skim her skin.
She wasn’t sure how long they stayed like that, caught in a limbo between wakefulness and sleep, with his heartbeat beneath her ear acting as her lullaby.
But eventually, the weight of the day began to catch up with her.
Just as she was on the cusp of sleep, she felt his lips brush against her forehead, barely there, like a secret.
"Sleep well," he whispered, so soft that she almost missed it.
"Night, Seung.." She whispered back, letting herself finally fall into sleep, comforted by the fact that, for now, things were exactly how they were supposed to be.
No nonchalance. No heavy talks.
Just the quiet, unspoken connection that somehow made it all make sense.
— next morning.
The first thing she noticed was the cold.
It wasn’t the kind of cold that came from a draughty window or a forgotten blanket.
Not really.
No, this was the absence of warmth—the absence of him.
Her body, once cocooned in his embrace, now lay exposed to the chill of the early morning air.
She blinked her eyes open slowly, the sunlight beginning to creep through the half open curtains, painting the room in soft shades of orange and gold.
But his warmth? Gone. Just like always.
With a heavy sigh, she turned her head toward the empty space beside her, the sheets already cooling where his body had been only a few hours before.
The faintest outline of his presence was still visible—a wrinkle in the bedding, the faintest impression of his form in the pillow.
But Seungmin? He was long gone.
It had become a routine by now, one she was all too familiar with. No matter how late the night before — no matter how close their bodies were tangled up in each other, or how intimate the way he held her — he always left before she woke.
Sometimes, she’d wake in the middle of the night, find him still there, his arms snug around her waist, his breath soft against her hair. But by morning? Always gone.
She stretched out a hand, her fingers brushing against the cold pillow where his head had been, and a familiar pang of emptiness settled in her chest.
It wasn’t like she expected anything different. This was their agreement, after all — being friends with benefits, emphasis on the “friends” part.
No strings attached. No feelings to complicate things.
Just two music majors, as close as dorm-mates, fulfilling their hollow desires.
Or at least, that’s what they kept telling themselves.
With a groan, the girl pulled herself up into a sitting position, running a hand through her messy hair as she stared at the empty side of the bed for a moment longer.
The apartment was quiet, the early morning stillness only punctuated by the faint sound of birds chirping outside the window. If she strained her ears, she could probably hear him in the kitchen, going about his morning routine like nothing had happened.
Like they hadn’t spent half the night wrapped up in each other’s arms, skin pressed to skin, whispered breaths filling the silence between them.
Pushing the thought aside, she swung her legs over the edge of the bed and stood up, the cool floor beneath her feet sending a brief shiver up her spine.
She grabbed her robe from the back of the door and wrapped it around herself, over her camisole, tying the belt with a quick knot before stepping out of her bedroom.
As expected, he was already in the kitchen.
The scent of freshly brewed coffee wafted through the small apartment, mingling with the sound of soft clinking dishes. He stood at the stove, back turned to her as he focused on whatever breakfast he was making.
His hair was still slightly tousled, sticking up in a few places from sleep, but otherwise, he looked like his usual self — calm, collected, completely unfazed by the night before.
Yet, adorable. Enough for her to fold over.
She lingered in the doorway for a moment, watching him. He was wearing a simple black t-shirt and grey sweatpants, his usual morning attire, and he moved around the kitchen with an easy grace, like he belonged there.
Like this was just another normal day.
Because to him, it was.
Or, at least that’s what she assumed.
She sighed, pushing the door of his room open a little wider as she stepped out of it, walking to the kitchen.
"Morning," she mumbled, her voice still thick with sleep.
Seungmin glanced over his shoulder at her, his expression unreadable as always, yet he gave her a tiny smile, which she knew was genuine.
"Morning, insomniac." he replied, as if he hadn’t left the bed they shared, just an hour ago.
She made her way to the counter, grabbing a mug and filling it with coffee from the pot he had brewed, a small smile tugging her lips at his reply.
She leaned against the kitchen counter, her fingers wrapped around the warm mug of coffee. She took a small sip, letting the heat spread through her as she watched the guy move around the kitchen with his usual quiet efficiency.
But as she took another sip of her coffee, she couldn’t help but feel the growing weight of those unspoken feelings, the ones that clung to her chest like a secret she didn’t want to acknowledge.
She glanced at him again, the way his hair was still a little messy, the way he absentmindedly hummed under his breath as he cooked. Her chest fluttered, just a bit, at the sight.
“Slept well, did you?”
His voice broke through her thoughts, casual as ever, but there was a softness to it – obviously since he already knew the answer, a smirk tugging the corner of his lips.
She shrugged, setting her mug down on the counter with a soft clink. “Surprisingly,”
He didn’t respond right away. He flipped the eggs with practised ease before turning off the stove, and when he turned around to face her, there was something unreadable in his eyes. His usual teasing smirk was absent, replaced by something quieter, more thoughtful.
She was sitting on the chair, fingers idly tracing the hem of the mug, gaze right on it but mind elsewhere.
For a moment, they just stood there, the silence between them heavy with all the things they never said.
The guy’s heart did that stupid thing again where it skipped a beat whenever she seemed like that – he could see straight through her.
Her baby hair framing her face, the sunlight bouncing off of the curves of her head. Pretty, black, eyes concentrated on the green mug, carrying the same depth they always did, and he would oh so fondly dive into them.
“Coffee too strong?” he asked, breaking the silence as he moved to pour himself a cup.
She let out a small breath she hadn’t realised she was holding. “It’s fine, just kinda tired,” she chuckled, crossing her arms over her chest, feeling suddenly exposed under his gaze.
“How.. about you? Sleep well?”
He shrugged, taking a sip of his coffee. “Slept fine until someone decided to practise gymnastics at 3 am.”
His words were teasing, but his voice was gentle, and for some reason, that made her heart skip a beat again.
She awkwardly smiled, scratching her arm, a habit she grew familiar with, and he knew it quite well.
“I’m sorry, I was– warm, okay?”
He chuckled, “Warm, and sleep-deprived but lost in thought? Yeah, I know,” he replied softly, his eyes lingering on her for a beat longer than necessary before he looked away, focusing on his coffee instead.
And that was the problem, wasn’t it? He always knew. Even when she didn’t say anything, even when she tried to brush it off, he always knew.
She hated that about him. And she loved it too.
“Thanks.” She suddenly murmured, “I mean, for uh, h-helping me sleep. Last night.”
He smiled, this time, softer than ever. “It’s nothing. At least you had a good sleep after.. I don't know, weeks?”
“It wasn’t that long!”
He shot her a look that she knew too well.
“Okay maybe it was. But that doesn’t matter for now,”
The corners of his lips curled up at her indignant reply, but he didn’t press further, simply shaking his head as he took another sip of his coffee.
His eyes flicked back to her, soft and observing, and for a moment, he let himself get lost in the simplicity of the scene – the quiet morning, the soft golden light filtering through the windows, and her, sitting at the counter, her sleepy, tousled appearance making her look unfairly adorable.
For a while, they just stayed like that, bantering and sipping their coffee, the easy silence between them filling the room.
It wasn’t awkward. It was never awkward with him.
That was part of the reason she kept coming back to this – whatever this was. It was easy. Comfortable.
But lately, that comfort had started to come with a twist – a knot of feelings tangled somewhere deep in her chest that she wasn’t quite sure what to do with.
His eyes were still on her, his teasing grin fading into something more thoughtful as the quiet stretched between them.
“You’re doing that.. thing again,” he said suddenly, voice low.
She blinked, tilting her head. “What thing?”
“The thinking thing. The kind that keeps you up all night.”
She felt her cheeks flush slightly and quickly looked away, pretending to focus on her coffee instead. “I’m not—”
“You are,” he cut in, his voice soft but firm. He set his mug down on the counter and took a few steps closer, stopping just a foot away from her.
“You get this look when you’re overthinking. Your eyebrows scrunch up, and you kind of space out, like you’re solving the world’s most complicated puzzle.”
Her lips parted slightly, caught off guard by how easily he read her. “So you stare, hm?” She grinned, trying to lift away the tension.
She didn’t know what to say, so she just stared down at her coffee, feeling a little too exposed under his knowing gaze.
“It’s kinda hard not to.” He replied a minute later, the same expression on his face.
“Well, I’m not always thinking about something.. deep.” she mumbled, but the protest was weak, and she knew it. “It’s just about uni, and other stuff, nothing to worry about.” She shrugged.
Seungmin just chuckled, a deep, throaty sound that made her chest flutter. “Sure,” he teased lightly, but then his voice softened. “Look, if something’s bothering you—”
“Nothing’s bothering me,” she interrupted quickly, her gaze flicking back to him, trying to muster a convincing smile. “I’m fine.”
Seungmin raised an eyebrow, clearly not buying it. “You know, for someone who’s known me this long, you’re terrible at lying.”
She let out an exaggerated groan, sinking further into her chair as she covered her face with her hands. “You’re so annoying,” she muttered, but there was no real heat behind her words.
“I try my best,” he quipped, the smirk back in full force. But then his expression softened again, and after a beat, he reached out, his hand ruffling her hair gently. “But seriously, Y/n. If you need to talk, I’m here.”
She peeked out from between her fingers, surprised by the sudden contact. His hand was warm, his touch soft and uncharacteristically gentle. She wasn’t used to this side of him—the one that was careful with her, the one that wasn’t constantly teasing or sarcastic. It made her chest tighten in a way that was both terrifying and comforting.
“I know,” she whispered, her voice small.
He gave a small nod and pulled his hand back, leaning against the counter again like nothing had happened. “Good.”
The room felt warmer now, despite the cool morning air seeping through the windows. Her heart was beating a little faster, and she wasn’t sure if it was because of his touch or the way his gaze lingered on her for just a second too long.
She cleared her throat, desperate to break the tension that was creeping in. “So,” she said, trying to sound casual. “What’s for breakfast?”
– almost 5 minutes later.
“You know,” she spoke, her voice casual now. “You’re really good at this.” She took a bite of the toasted bread, looking at him.
He glanced at her over his shoulder, flipping the last omelette, eyebrow raised. “Good at what? Making breakfast?”
“What? No,” she said, shaking her head with her eyes judging him. “Why do you think I don’t let you make lunch or dinner? I don’t want to be fined because someone blew up the oven.”
“Hey, I'm not that bad,” He glanced her way, defending himself. “I’m literally making breakfast right now.”
“You’ve cooked the same eggs or burnt pancakes for breakfast for almost 4 weeks in a row, Seungmin.” She rolled her eyes, speaking again. “But, what I meant was.. you’re good at comforting me.”
For a second, the air between them shifted, the teasing banter falling away as her words hung in the space between them. He turned fully to face her now, his expression softening as he met her gaze.
“Well,” he said slowly, his voice soft, “you make it pretty easy.”
Her heart did that stupid fluttering thing again, and she quickly averted her gaze, suddenly feeling shy under his intense stare. “You’re such a sap,” she muttered, though her voice lacked the usual bite.
He chuckled, his smile reaching his eyes as he turned back to the food, finishing plating the eggs and toast for himself. “Maybe,” he admitted, sliding on the chair beside her. “But only for you.”
She blinked, silently, as her heart skipped a beat at his words. She stared at him, but he didn’t seem fazed by what he’d just said, casually sitting down across from her and taking a bite of his toast like he hadn’t just made her entire world tilt on its axis.
Oh, but little did she know, he was as surprised as her at those words leaving his mouth. The fluttering feeling inside his heart, the way she was looking at him, when he tried so hard to act nonchalant.
She picked up her fork, her hands suddenly feeling clumsy as she poked at her food.
⠀⠀𓄳 ֹ ͏ ⊹ 𓎆⠀. 𓂅 ֹ ͏⠀◯
a/n ♡︎
OMGGGG
happy birthday to the love of my life my baby seungminieneeiensiseesn
I STILL HAVENT COMPLETED LIX FIC.
I AM SO SORRY YALL ILL POST WHEN I CAN 😞😞😞😞
exams start tmr kms
this is a twoshot btw. so wait patiently for the final part tysmmm <3
plz reblog/comment/like if u like my fics <33
made another spam acc for skz @loveforseung
ALSO I HAVE AO3 !! user's same as @loveforseung go follow !!
making a masterlist for all of my posts, plz lmk if u wanna be a part of it ! <3
have a good day ~
– love, yani ♥︎
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𝐏𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐭:
𝐓𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐬𝐩𝐨𝐭 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥𝐬 𝐚 𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐭𝐨𝐨 𝐠𝐨𝐨𝐝…!
⋅ ˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅ ⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅ ⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅ ⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅
𝐒𝐲𝐥𝐮𝐬:
“Yes,” Sylus threw his head back, exposing his adam’s apple. “Just like that.”
Things had gotten a little heated on the couch in the living room.
You two had been watching this old ass movie tied to a soundtrack in Sylus’s vinyl collection as a pastime, and had clearly gotten distracted.
He had been very periodic and methodical with his caresses and touched, before finally leaning over and whispering in your ear, “instead of watching a movie, why don’t we make one?”
Stupid. How predictable.
Sylus was beyond hot though, so you let it slide.
Turning away for a moment to roll your eyes, you swing your leg over his lap to straddle him.
And that’s how you two ended up here.
You’d never had a makeout session so intense.
You felt his hands all over you… you felt like you were on fire.
You were also more than positive that your wetness had leaked all the way through your panties and pants.
“Oh!”
Your train of thought was interrupted when Sylus thrusted right up into you.
It felt so good… you could feel his hard dick pressing right into your clit.
“You shouldn’t give away what you like so easily, sweetie,” He gave one last squeeze to your tits before moving his hands down to grip your waist. “You’re giving me such a large advantage.”
Jesus Christ he talks too damn much.
You didn’t particularly feel like arguing with him today. Sure, it could be fun, but what you really wanted was to shut him up.
Deciding to take the initiative, you repositioned yourself to sit right on his hard dick, and started to roll your hips back and forth.
Sylus inhaled sharply, something you didn’t miss.
Grinding on him slowly and sensually, you feel his hands twitch on your waist as you kissed down his jawline to give his neck a sharp bite.
The sound of Sylus’s heavy breathing and moaning only egged you on further.
“Fuck, kitten,” He shut his eyes tightly, throwing his head back. “Wait…”
Sylus was going fucking crazy.
Why did it feel so good? It was just a little kissing and grinding.
He suddenly felt like a horny teenager all over again.
But it felt so fucking good… you felt so fucking good. Rarely did you ever have the chance to get on top like this.
Maybe he should let you do it more often.
It was so out of character for him, to be moaning and panting like this. His head was a mess.
His boxers were a mess too, all the precum he had been leaking.
The electrifying feeling of your wet cunt dragging over his cock was driving him over the edge quicker than he’d like to admit.
“Wait, please,” Sylus felt fucking neurotic, begging like this. “Y/N… wait…”
It wasn’t long after that Sylus felt himself cum in his pants. Hard.
Holding you tightly by the waist and panting up a storm.
Oh my god… there’s no way he…?
You quickly sat up on your knees, lifting yourself off of his lap to see with your own two eyes.
And he did! There was an unmistakable wet spot right where his dick was.
Fuck… it was so erotic.
𝐙𝐚𝐲𝐧𝐞:
Unintentional dry spells. It was common between you and Zayne.
He was always busy at the hospital and you were constantly running around to kick wanderer ass.
But you two always made that lost time up.
In fact; you can say with full confidence that you preferred the sex after the build up.
There was a particular intensity that came with it that simply couldn’t be replicated.
Nobody else saw Zayne with this level of passion but you.
It was his day off and he had invited you over.
While you two had been once sitting on his couch, things had began to get heated after Zayne initiated a kiss with you, stating how much he missed you.
It was rare for him to verbalize exactly what he felt so boldly.
Oh he was so sweet. The sweetest man you’d ever met.
Cut to you being on top of him with him laying on the couch below you.
You don’t even remember when you got on top of him. Well… not that it mattered.
Not when he was making you feel this good. He was the only thing on your mind at the moment.
“Y/N… please,” You felt his grip on your waist tighten as he squeezed his eyes shut. “Wait…”
Hearing him beg and plead with you was making you unbelievably wet.
You didn’t want to stop. You couldn’t stop. It was too good. And you’d been waiting for him for hours.
With every pass of Zayne’s hard cock over your clothed clit you became more and more aggressive.
“I’m not going to last like this,” He said breathlessly. “Please, my love, enough…!”
Oh my god was it your birthday?
Making Zayne cum in his pants sounded maddening.
He was under you losing his mind.
Zayne could feel how wet you were through all the layers you two were wearing.
The delicious friction of how perfectly you were grinding on him was bringing him to his climax all too quickly.
“Y/N… I’m-”
Digging his fingers into your hips, Zayne came all into his boxers.
Shit… you drove him crazy.
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