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#and my favorite thing is relating what i do every day to what we think they did
ttearsofthekingdom · 2 months
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Whenever I accidentally scratch my teeth with a fork I am reminded of the paleolithic teeth that were found scratched... ancient humans who would hold skins in their teeth and stretch them with stones.... we are the same...!
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girls-and-honey · 1 year
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Hiya honey girl!
How are you doing? ♥️
I feel gay today, and I don’t have anyone to vent to, so it’s gonna be you I’m afraid
I feel so gay, I spent half the day looking longingly in the distance, and *sighing* wishfully
Do you ever feel like that?
Last week I bought a red rose from a dude in the street and offered it to a beautiful lady singer in a bar, and even if I don’t particularly want to see her again, it still felt good to do something chivalrous and lesbiany you know?
I like living my life on my own, but some days I wish I could do those romantic things with somebody, like holding hands and cuddling, and walking along the river, and maybe kissing a little.
Even if I’m happy by myself, sometimes I still yearn for the day I’ll have my own lady to offer my roses to 🥺
inkaaaa hi hi <3
I'm doing pretty good, in drastic need of a weekend. almost there!
!!! gay vents are always welcome here! oh to look longingly into the distance whilst sighing wishfully...
do I ever feel like that YES absolutely in fact while pondering my response I did just that asjdfkl okay I might ramble in the tags but yeah completely relate to be happy with life on my own but sometimes wishing it wasn't just me yeah I'm definitely going to ramble in the tags
offering a beautiful lady a rose I'm 🥺🥺 sometimes you just have to indulge in chivalrous lesbiany actions this is unavoidable. manifesting this for you, I hope all your rose offering yearnings come true!
#this is so sweet and very relatable alksdfjs#only opting to ramble in the tags instead of the response bc I feel like this is going to get long lol you've been warned#but yeah. definitely do feel the happy by myself but sometimes wish I could be sharing that time with others#sometimes if i'm watching tv I'll wonder what new shows or movies I'd be watching if someone else was here#instead of the same eight shows I just watch on rotation all year (this is bc I like them btw. it's just hard to watch new shows#without external motivation to do so)#or when I'm working on the blanket that's been in progress almost two years. I wonder if I'd be making it in someone else's favorite colors#lot of little thoughts like this. some are fleeting and others I tend to get stuck on a bit or overthink#like breakfast for example. would I eat breakfast more consistently if I was also making it for someone else? what if they prefer to eat#the same thing every day? i need variety but I could make sure we always have their favorite fruit or put their cereal box out to make it#easier. or if getting the cereal out is part of their routine i can make sure their favorite bowl is always clean#i find myself wondering which of my mugs would be their favorite? which of theirs would be my favorite?#yeah i'm an acts of service person can you tell. also quality time... can you imagine the shared floor time conversations#a lot of the time I picture myself doing the exact same thing like watching tv and playing switch or practicing music or even working#the biggest different is just that someone else would also be here doing their own thing#to scroll tumblr in silence from the same couch... sending each other posts even though we're both right there. I do miss that#even chores would be more fun and go quicker I think. racing to see if they can do the dishes faster than I can fold and hang laundry#tidying and putting our things together in shared spaces. seeing them side by side just like we are#making the bed together and putting each of our stuffed animals on our own side#or maybe I'd just make it so they have one less thing to worry about#I think i've exposed myself enough alskdfj but there are quite literally hundreds more where those came from#anyway who wants to admit they have a crush on me (kidding) (ish)#asks#oops after posting this is looks like way more tags than I thought it would sorry anyone who made it this far
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the-peak-tmnt · 4 months
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Hey The Neon Void readers, quick update from the author's sister!
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(art commission by @kaysdenofchaos)
Hi readers of The Neon Void fanfic. This is the author’s older sister. She’s been getting a lot of fan art and asks lately. She’s sent me screenshots of a few unanswered ones looking for advice on how to respond.
While all the love and support of TNV is genuinely appreciated, my sister @sugarpasteltmnt is not equipped to respond to a small handful of these asks/comments that are, quite frankly, inappropriate.
Sugarpastels is not a therapist, and she’s certainly not an internet stranger’s therapist.
She’s an adult with an extremely demanding and stressful job for a very large client. Some of you have already experienced and enjoyed her work IRL without knowing it. Her company is close to finishing another project that will bring a lot of joy to hundreds of thousands of people every year, but working on a project of that scale is extremely stressful.
She is writing this fanfic for fun. TNV is a way for her to decompress and put her creative energy towards something other than work.
What’s not fun is coming home to asks/comments from readers who are projecting their own struggles/mental health onto TNV, and even Sugarpastels herself, and demanding some sort of attention from her over it.
Let’s be real: it’s fun to watch our blorbos suffer! So much of fandom is just us putting our favorite characters in Situations because it’s fun. Simple as that. But I think another reason TNV has resonated so strongly with readers is because of the way Sugarpastels writes the internal struggles of these characters.
We are both aware that TNV deals with mental health topics. Since the early days of “modern” fandom, fanfiction has been a way for people to explore complicated, difficult and sometimes even taboo subjects. There’s no shortage of complex feelings being explored in TNV, which is why we’re all having so much fun reading it.
But that’s all it is; an exploration. Sugarpastels is not a mental health expert. I’ve read a handful of books on PTSD and mindfulness for research while writing my own fanfic, and I would never consider myself prepared to help someone else.
It’s okay if you relate to things from TNV. I know I do! Again, fanfic has always been a way to read about things rarely dealt with (or handled poorly) in published fiction/tv shows/movies. I will always argue one of the greatest things about fanfiction and other fanworks is being able to see ourselves and our own struggles through our favorite fictional characters.
But Sugarpastels is not a fictional character. She’s a real person. Most importantly (to me at least) she’s my little sister, and this big sister cannot handle watching some of her readers expect more of her than is appropriate.
So I’m asking you to please be mindful of what you ask/say to not just her, but literally everyone on the internet. Unless you’re chatting with someone regularly, they do not know you. Whether it’s friends, family, teachers, coaches, etc, there are people in your life who know you personally, and are therefore better equipped to help you than a stranger on the internet.
Sugarpastels is so full of empathy that it’s hard to not feel for you when you send things like this. But it just isn’t fair to put that kind of unnecessary pressure on someone who is, at the end of the day, just trying to have some fun writing about ninja turtles bein’ sad.
(That being said, PLEASE DON’T BE SCARED TO SEND HER ASKS AND FAN ART!!! They make her day every single time and are seriously so, so appreciated. She’s texting me about it constantly how much she loves all of TNV’s readers. This whole post is really directed at an extremely small percentage of her readers, but there have been enough I felt something needed to be said.)
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lucidreamer-uwu · 2 years
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Things that make them fall deeper in love with you | Brothers Edition
Lucifer
Sticking your tongue out in mischief, or when you feel silly, at him.
Poking his shoulder to get his attention and quickly moving out of sight when he looks, only to find you smiling at him on the opposite side.
Making him coffee.
Reminding him about tasks he has to do like meetings, paperwork, or student council things.
Asking him about small details about himself.
Your cute puppy dog eyes when you beg him for something.
Your focused face.
Mammon
Idly smiling at him. Even more so if you stare.
Genuinely complimenting him.
Recognizing that he isn't what everyone thinks he is.
Booping his nose when you're face to face with each other.
Seeing your reactions when you receive his gifts.
Making mischief with him.
Reading magazines he's in together.
Surprising him at his modelling gigs.
Your laugh.
Leviathan
Cheering for him in games, school work, or anything in general.
Surprise hugs from behind.
Whispering sweet nothings in his ear.
Head pats.
Insisting on making a very elaborate otaku secret handshake.
Holding onto him when you watch or play something scary.
Rare moments when you make an embarrassed face.
Seeing you dance and/or sing anything anime related.
Being clumsy.
Satan
Sneezing softly. It reminds him of how cats sneeze. He thinks it's absolutely adorable.
Talking about your favorite books, which parts you liked the most, what you thought about the plot and characters.
Rambling about anything and everything that pops into your mind to him.
Combing your fingers through his hair as he reads a book and drinks his tea.
Kissing his forehead.
Taking his hand in yours.
Pouting.
Choosing him. When you tell anyone else that you're busy being with him to hang out.
Asmodeus
Volunteering to help him with his various self-care routines.
Telling him that he's even more beautiful on the inside.
Being there when those rare insecure times roll in on him.
Cupping his face, smiling, and telling him you love him.
Your "angry" face.
Intertwining your fingers with his and swinging your hands as you walk.
Sleeping in his bed.
Touching your noses and foreheads together.
Asking him to wear matching outfits.
When you touch/poke his nails one by one and hum a cute tune like a kid.
Beelzebub
The way your eyes turn into hearts as you watch him do anything.
When you try to challenge him in a determined way.
Using his arm as a pillow.
Wiping crumbs off his face.
Bringing him snacks at his practice.
Secretly handing him food after Lucifer confiscates his during a student council meeting.
When you work out.
When you're lazy.
That face you make when you enjoy your food.
When you cook.
Belphegor
Your blushy face.
Your sleeping face.
Your worried face. But only if you're worried about him.
Your panicking face.
Any silly face you make when you try to cheer him up or make him laugh.
How determined you are to motivate him.
The way you slide your hand under his bangs when you check him for a fever.
The rhythm of your heartbeat and the sound of your breathing.
Poking his cheek.
Feeding him when he's too tired to feed himself.
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HI EVERYONE I'M BACK!! After not posting or updating the blog for about 2 months I'm actually glad that you legends still follow me uwu. Sorry to disappoint, I'm not dead yet >:3
Anyways, thank you thank you thank you for all the continuous support and love that you give me despite my sudden disappearance lol. I appreciate every single one of you 💕
UPDATE: I will do my very best to answer all the pending asks in my inbox and the ones that I've already started working on and are in my drafts ; w ; so look forward to it because I didn't forget about them <;3
ANNOUNCEMENT: As of the writing of this post, asks are currently closed. HOWEVER I will be reopening my asks when I reach 600 followers ^ ^ ! We are currently at 550 ♡(⁠ ⁠˶⁠ ⁠❛⁠ ⁠ꁞ⁠ ⁠❛⁠ ⁠˶⁠ ⁠)⁠♡
I hope everyone has a wonderful day/night!! Love you all, stay awesome 💫
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traveler-at-heart · 5 months
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Across the Natashaverse - Part 2
Natasha Romanoff x F!R
Summary: After you're sent to another world, Natasha has to deal with yourself, from another universe, and a very different life.
Other POV from this fic.
“Put more weight on your left foot” Natasha says, barely checking America’s movements.
Of course she knows this is important. Maria asked her to train Chavez in the basics of hand to hand combat. Her mind is elsewhere, though.
Especifically, you.
Natasha thought she was doing you a favor, she really did. Someone as kind as you could do much better than her. Agreeing to a date would only give you false hope, so she rejected the invitation.
It was foolish of her to think that things would be the same after that. You weren’t distant or rude, though that might have been easier.
Every morning, you’d still have breakfast with her, show her funny videos or tell her about your latest discoveries in the lab with Stark, which in the end, were related to her work as well.
You simply stopped sharing your interests, or going out of your way to seek her company. Long gone were the days of sitting together at the Met while you talked about your favorite paintings. Or the grocery shopping that turned into strolls through Central Park and ended in your favorite bookshop.
All that was left now were pleasantries.
“Am I doing it right?” America asks. She sure as hell isn’t, so Natasha shakes her head, hoping she can manage to focus on the task at hand.
“Stop” she says, stepping on the sparring mat.
“Please don’t tell me you want me to fight you”
“You’re punching the air, Chavez. The only way to learn is by doing. It will be fine”
The girl doesn’t seem too convinced, but Natasha starts with slow movements and corrects America as they go. When the intensity of the training increases, the girl’s powers begin to stir. A yellow flash on the ceiling distracts Natasha, and the next thing she feels is America’s fist colliding with her cheek.
“Crap! Agent Romanoff, I’m so sorry”
But there’s another loud thud, not far from the gym.
“Did you hear that?” Natasha asks, trying to figure what the noise is.
“Maybe”
“Take a break” Natasha instructs, looking around the room to check if everything’s alright. The team is still figuring out the extent of her powers and Natasha worries the girl just unleashed a demonic creature or something.
The redhead is so focused on the room, she doesn’t notice someone approaching.
That is, until she feels a hard slap on her ass, and a sultry voice against her ear.
“There’s my favorite ass-assin”
Five seconds later, she has the intruder upside down, back against the floor, gasping for air.
“Baby, I know you don’t like my jokes but this is a little too much, don’t you think?”
It takes her a second to process what’s happening.
“Y/N?”
“Hey, love” you smirk, all smug despite being knocked down by Natasha. “The weirdest thing just happened, I was going to get a snack because Anya was moody and then fell on my ass right outside the gym”
Natasha stares at you, as if you’re speaking a foreign language. And then it all clicks. The slightly longer hair, how you smell and feel different.
She let’s go of you and starts pulling your shirt by the collar.
“Hell yeah, let’s get naked”
“Where’s your birthmark?”
“I don’t have a…”
“You’re from another world”
“Ah, that’s so sweet…” you try to lean forward and kiss her, but she pushes you away. “Babe, I’m getting mixed signals here”
“F.R.I.D.A.Y., call for an emergency meeting”
“I’m sorry, she’s what?” Sam points at you, and Natasha pinches the bridge of her nose.
“She’s from another universe. America must have opened up a portal when we were training”
“Alright, so she just opens it back and we correct the mistake”
“It’s not that simple” Tony walks in.
“Uhm, guys. This meeting should be for Avengers only” you lower your voice, eyeing the man suspiciously.
“Hello? That table you’re sitting in so carelessly. Mahogany. Paid by me”
“Yeah, I’ve never seen this man before”
���A world without Tony Stark” Steve says, amused.
“Must be really quiet in your Compound” Sam says and you smirk.
“Why, no thanks to you. Not with all those super models you’re always bringing back to your room” you raise your eyebrows and Sam’s eyes widen.
“I date super models? I wanna go to her world”
Steve and Tony begin to argue about how that will make the multiverse collapse, when Natasha interrupts them.
“She’s messing with you, idiots”
Tony and Sam look at each other and then at you. You almost fall to the ground as you laugh. Since you’re not helpful, the team ignores you as they keep discussing the best way to identify your reality and correct the glitch.
“Y/N 2.0, we need more information about your… where did she go?” Tony grumbles.
“I got this” Natasha sighs, stomping to the kitchen. Sure enough, you’re rummaging through the fridge, complaining at every item of food you find.
“Don’t you have anything with sugar here?”
“You’re free to prepare anything for yourself”
“Not unless you want the kitchen to explode, Nat”
The redhead pushes you aside, while you look around the living room, inspecting the pictures on every place you can find.
“No wedding? Or Anya?”
“Nope” Natasha says, her voice shaking lightly.
“Why?”
“None of your business” she says, handing you a plate with a sanwich.
“Thanks. How did you know I was lying about Stark and Wilson?”
“Your voice gets all high pitched when you tell a lie” she answers, refusing to look at you.
“Huh” you mumble, taking a bite out of the sandwich. “Um. Is this peanut butter?”
“Would her Highness prefer caviar?” Natasha teases, but turns around and finds you covered in hives. “Shit!”
“That’s fine” you say, struggling to breathe. “Nothing an epi can’t fix, love”
You pass out in the middle of the kitchen, wondering if you’ll leave this foreign universe in one piece.
After leaving you at the medbay, Natasha goes back to the meeting room. She’s examining all the reports and missions that are related to multiverses. It’s a lot to digest, including all the quantum physics.
Alone for the first time since this whole thing started, she finally allows herself the chance to miss you. Right around this time, you’d be making dinner, and she’d be in the kitchen, pretending to help just to be close to you.
What if she never gets you back?
“Hello, there” a voice says. You approach slowly, knowing it’s best not to surprise her.
“How are you feeling? I’m really sorry…”
“There’s no way you could have known. It honestly never occurred to me that things like allergies were different” you say, patting her leg. “Interested in string theory?”
“Yeah, it’s a great ice breaker” Natasha says, and you chuckle. “You don’t seem too worried”
“The America Chavez of my world has had a bit more training. I’m sure I’ll be back home for lunch tomorrow”
“You could have said something!” Natasha feels the need to kick your ass again.
“Hey, I was gonna! And then I almost died”
“Jerk”
“What are you so worried about? She’s in a safe world”
“What if your Natasha gave Y/N a similar welcome?”
“Oh, I’m sure she had her pinned to a wall, only for very different reasons”
Natasha turns to you, alarmed. Her jealousy is so obvious that all you can do is laugh.
“There it is. I wasn’t sure you had any feelings towards her. Wanna tell me what happened?” you nudge her chair with your foot and she looks at you, annoyed.
“She asked me out, gave me flowers, I said no”
“Flowers, huh? Well, she’s more romantic than me. Natasha and I were pretending to be a couple for a mission and then I just blurted out I wouldn’t mind doing it again under different circumstances” you explain, laughing at the memory.  “But hey, if flowers and chocolates aren’t your thing, I respect it”
“It’s not like that”
“Then, what is it like?”
She thinks back to all the times you’ve made her feel safe, cared for, loved. You make it look so easy, but for the life of her, Natasha can’t figure out how to reciprocate.
What you make her feel, is too good and beautiful for someone like her.
“I haven’t earned her love” is all she manages to say.
“Natasha” you call, softly, and only speak when she finally turns to you. “You don’t have to do anything to be deserving of love”
There is silence, and then you take her hand in yours.
“Come on, I’m starving. Let’s grab some Chinese”
“Fine. No more peanut butter, though. I don’t want to fight myself if something happens to you”
“Now that would be entertaining”
Next morning, everyone is back in the meeting room. Apparently, due to some bad experiences, they’ve decided you should come back to your world immediately, before the universes collapse.
“I promise you, it will be fine” you insist. Natasha is the only one that seems to believe you, so you save yourself the trouble and spin around in the office chair.
“Can you stop?” Steve says, irritated.
“I’m trying to create a vortex that is powerful enough to send me back to my reality, Steve” but he still glares and you stand up. “Fine. I’m getting a snack”
As you exit the room, Natasha comes running behind you.
“Wait. I wanted to apologize”
“Steve is an old grumpy man, don’t sweat it”
“No, not about that. I’m sorry for… being so hard on you when you first got here”
“We deal with aliens and all kinds of threats.  It’s not so crazy to think that an intruder is dangerous. It’s all good, Nat” you shrug your shoulders.
“I just wouldn’t be ok if your Natasha had acted that way with my Y/N”
“Your Y/N?” you repeat, pleased as Natasha blushes. “Good for you, Romanoff. Get the girl. Trust me when I say, she’ll make it worth it” you wiggle your eyebrows.
“Such a flirt”
“We can’t help ourselves around you, no matter the universe”
You wink, and walk to the kitchen, leaving Natasha in the hallway.
Inevitably, she thinks about you. The one that belongs here, with her. Are you enjoying your time in that other universe? Will you resent her for bringing you back? Maybe that Natasha is more loving and sweet, and you’ll finally realise that she can’t actually make you happy…
Her thoughts begin to spiral again, until the commotion in the room breaks her train of thought.
“Damn, you fell from the ceiling” Sam says, looking up. A yellow portal closes just as Natasha opens up the door. Everyone’s around you, and when your face comes to view, Natasha’s heart almost stops.
There’s a little cut and bruising from the fall, but you’re back.
She pushes everyone, and wraps you in her arms. You return the gesture.
“Hey, it’s ok. It’s me”
She hugs you closer, smiling against your neck.
Natasha’s never letting go again.
“So, tell me everything!” you say, sitting next to Natasha as you drive back home. “Did I tell you I almost died to peanut exposure?”
“Looks like someone had fun” your wife comments and you smile.
“What about you, my love? Did you do anything dirty with my other self?”
“Well, there might have been some kissing and touching before I noticed…”
“Not to brag, but the other Natasha was on top of me” you say, trying to pretend like it’s no big deal your wife kissed another you.
“You pissed her off and she threw you to the ground, didn’t she?” Natasha smirks.
Damn it.
“Maybe”
Seeing your daughter brings you back to reality. Fun as it was to be in another universe, your life is perfect here.
“Mommy, are you cooking dinner again tonight?” the girl says as you carry her to the kitchen.
“Uh… let’s have lunch first, yes? Go wash your hands”
Natasha hands you a plate of what the other Y/N made and you gasp.
“Holy crap, this is delicious! Babe, not gonna lie, I wouldn’t have judged you if you fucked her against a wall after tasting her food”
“You’re such an idiot” Natasha rolls her eyes, sitting on your lap and stealing a bite of the pasta. “But you are my idiot”
“Always and in every universe, baby”
You kiss her softly, happy to be home.
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diana-thyme · 1 year
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SUPER Low Energy Witchcraft
I’ve been seeing a lot of low energy witchcraft posts, but every one I read isn’t really low energy. When I think ‘low energy,’ I think something I can do on my lowest of low days. Days I can’t get out of bed or even think sometimes. So here it is. The SUPER Low Energy Witchcraft Guide.
Sigils sites. I have found this one to be very good. They’ll make a sigil for you so you don’t have to.
Pinterest boards. Making spells or manifesting using Pinterest boards is one of my favorite things to do.
Spotify playlists. Similar to the Pinterest board idea, use songs to create spells or manifest certain things.
Emoji spells. Use emojis to make spells, making sure they’re packed with intent.
Hang out with your tarot deck. Or any divination tool, for that matter. Just having it near you counts.
Talking to spirits and deities. Tell them about something you plan to do for them, a ritual you’d like help with, ask for help getting through the lows, etc. Or just talk to them. It doesn’t matter about what, talking improves relationships.
Read. Read books you were planning on reading. Definitely do not ever go on Z-Library for free books. Never. /s You do have limits on downloading and it’s relatively hard to figure out on mobile, but if you can get your tablet or computer up and running, it’ll work perfectly.
Scroll through Tumblr. Or Reddit. Or Pinterest. Or even Tik Tok. Scroll through the witch tags, scroll through the tags of and deities you might worship/work with. Or just look at pretty plants. Think about what they can help you with.
Make a shopping list. If you need to restock any herbs or candles, note it down.
Just light a candle or two. Simple as that.
Make a pouch or enchant a piece of jewelry or whatever you want to do to help you recover from your lows before they happen. Touch them or hold them or even just think of them when you want.
Similar to above, enchant any aids (mobility aids, medication, pain relievers, heating pads and ice packs, etc.) to help you recover faster.
If you can, think about your practice, what you want to change, what you 100% wouldn’t change, how it relates to others’ crafts, etc.
Meditate. I’m not talking about some 30 minute guided meditation sitting upright, because I have trouble with them on my lows. I’m talking about staring blankly into space or practicing mindfulness or something like that. You don’t have to do it for long, either. Take a few minutes to chill.
If you can, open your windows. Or curtains. Or blinds. Let it clear out your space.
Enchant your water or foods to help with your symptoms. Draw a sigil with anything (oil, sharpie, air, etc.) on your bottles and above your food to aid in your recovery.
Wash your face and/or hands to cleanse yourself for the day.
Have a ‘worry stone.’ Take a crystal or rock or other stone and rub it when you’re anxious. Or, enchant it to remove negative energies and rub it when your pain is at the worst. The very least it will do is distract you.
Simply rest. Resting and taking some time to recover is the best practice.
Obviously this isn’t a large list, but I cannot emphasize the ‘simply rest’ part enough. As practitioners, we tend to want to do more when we’re sitting bored in bed. But remember, safety first. The quicker you recover, the quicker you can get back to your craft.
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sunflower-lilac42 · 5 days
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𝗵𝗮𝗽𝗽𝘆 𝗱𝗮𝘆𝘀 | 𝘯𝘩13 ♔
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➪ summary: when y/n gets her brothers and her boyfriend to visit her class, word comes out that nico wants to marry her
➪ warnings: none
➪ word count: 2.9k
➪ file type: fic
➪ sunny's notes: repost
nhl masterlist || taglist || navigation
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It wasn’t the first time the kids had talked about hockey, in fact, it was probably like the millionth time they’ve talked about hockey. She didn’t even know this many kids were fans of the Devils, but low and behold, of course, she could get a class full of hockey fans. On ‘Meet the Teacher’ night, she was pretty sure every kid had asked her if she was related to the Hughes brothers.
On the first day of school, she introduced herself, “Hi everyone! My name is Miss. Hughes and I’m so excited to teach you guys this year!”
“Miss. Hughes?” A hand popped up immediately after the words and she looked over, “Yes?”
“Do you know Jack and Luke Hughes?”
She smiled, “I might, why?”
“Because they are so cool!” All the other kids agreed.
“Are you guys Devils fans?”
They all nodded excitedly, smiles plastered on their faces. She then looked at them seriously, “Do you guys think you can keep a secret?”
They all nodded again, “Jack and Luke are my brothers.”
“No way!” The kids all let out gasps, almost starstruck by her words.
She nodded, “Oh yeah. You guys want proof?”
She pulled up a photo of her, Jack, Quinn, and Luke, showing it to the kids, “This is us from this past summer.”
“Are they older than you?”
“Just Quinn, I’m older than Jack and Luke.”
“I have a younger brother too!”
“I have a sister!”
“My brother’s older than me!”
“That is so cool, you guys! How about at the end of the day you can ask me anything you want about hockey or my brothers, but for right now we need to learn about some classroom rules and other things. I might even have an activity for you to do.”
Ever since then, the kids loved to ask her questions about it no matter what. If they were supposed to be working on counting their numbers, they would ask her about them, if they were supposed to be learning about planets, they asked her about hockey, if they were supposed to be working on spelling, they asked her about the game last night.
She had adjusted some things to incorporate hockey and the Devils while learning. She would give them bonus spelling quizzes about hockey teams, she would use their numbers to help them add or subtract, and she would use the teams as help for colors. Sometimes she even gets them to start learning a bit of geography and memorizing where each team is from.
Then she was begged to keep track of every game they lost and won. So each month she would set out a little portion of the whiteboard and write out the schedule, writing a ‘w’ or a ‘l’ next to it the following day or on Monday.
Come, January, the kids were super excited when they found out Quinn and Jack were going to the all-star game. It was all they were able to talk about. And after that, she decided she wanted to do something special for them. They had never even thought of the idea and she was glad that they didn’t. It took a lot of sweet talk from her to get all of the boys to agree, and when they did she gave them hugs, practically squeezing them to death. She also was planning on a bonus surprise, knowing how much they would love it.
It was the week of the All-Star break, Quinn had flown to Jersey yesterday. She had decided to cut out the science portion of their day because the kids hated science, it was their least favorite thing ever. So she got the kids to sit in a circle on the carpet. The boys were standing outside the classroom listening to everything that she said, “Okay, you guys have been so good lately and I wanted to give you guys a surprise.”
Excited giggles and small screams echoed through the classroom and the boys outside started laughing a little. She shook her head and sat down on her chair, “You guys have to behave okay because no other class is getting a surprise. You promise?”
They all nodded, “Okay, so you guys know how it’s All-Star break this week?”
“Yeah!”
“And you know how on Thursday Quinn and Jack are drafting their team?”
The kids once again said yes, excitedly nodding their heads, “Miss. Hughes?”
“Yeah?”
“What’s the surprise?”
“I’m getting there! Well, they were talking about how much they didn’t get to see me and how much they missed me.” All the kids giggled and one girl popped up, “You’re being silly, Miss. Hughes.”
“You’re right, I am. They didn’t say that to me. But I asked them a little while ago if they wanted to hang out and if they wanted to ask me for a favor.”
“What’s a favor?”
“It’s where you ask someone to do something for you.”
“What did you ask them?”
“Do you guys really want to know?”
“Yes!!”
“Okay… I guess I can tell you.” She got up and walked out of the classroom, the kids looked at each other confused, and started to whisper.
When she walked back in, Quinn, Jack, and Luke followed her, the kids immediately letting out screams of excitement, “Hey, what did I say about being loud?”
The kids quieted down a little but still were bouncing with excitement, all of them repeatedly saying their names over and over again. Y/n got the kids to settle down and told the three of them to sit in their seats, “Okay you guys. Do you know who these people are?”
One boy raised his hand, practically begging her to call on him, “Yes Liam?”
“They’re your brothers!”
“That’s right. Do you know their names?”
“Luke, Quinn, and Jack!”
“Do you guys have any questions for them?”
For the next ten minutes, they answered questions until one of the kids softly called out her name. She got up and walked over to her, kneeling down to be at her height, “What’s up kiddo?”
“Why is there an extra chair?”
“Oh, that’s a good question. Should we let everyone else know the question because I might have an exciting answer?”
She nodded and y/n sat down next to her, having everyone stop speaking, “Okay guys. Belle has a question.”
“Why is there an extra chair?”
“Well, that’s because I have another surprise for you!”
“Another surprise?”
“Yeah, you guys wanna know?”
They all nodded, “Yes! Yes! Yes!”
“Alright. Neeks, come on in!”
Nico walked in at the sound of his name and y.n could’ve sworn that the kids were more excited to see him than her brothers. A lot of them ran up and hugged him, y/n laughing a little bit at the interaction. She watched in awe as she watched her boyfriend interact with the kids, her heartwarming a little bit. Belle, the girl who had asked her the question initially, turned around from where she stood and asked loudly, “Miss. Hughes, is he your boyfriend?”
All the kids looked at her expectantly and she blushed, “Yes. He is.”
All of them gasped in excitement, “No way! That’s soooo cool!”
She laughed at their comments and allowed them to continue asking questions to the four of them. When twenty more minutes had passed and it was time for them to go to lunch she had them sit back down on the carpet, “Now what do we say to Quinn, Luke, Nico, and Jack for coming?”
“Thank you!”
The four laughed and said ‘you're welcome’ in unison. As another surprise, they all gave them a puck with their signatures on them. The kids gushed about it on their way to lunch and until the rest of the day. She was able to have lunch with the four of them in her classroom, eating whatever food they had bought for her.
The joy on their faces was something she would never be able to reciprocate even if she tried, it made tears spring in her eyes, “Thank you guys for coming. It really means a lot.”
They all smiled at her, Quinn wrapping her in a hug, “It was really no problem, y/n/n.”
“Yeah, I know but it’s your guys’ all-star break and I know that you two have to be in Toronto soon. And Luke and Neeks probably want a day off.”
All four of them shook their heads, Nico coming to sit next to her, “If we wanted a day off, we would’ve said no schatzi.”
She nodded, still unable to control the few tears that formed in her eyes. She leaned her head on his shoulder and reached for his hand, “They literally never shut up about you guys.”
It was silent for a moment before a little voice startled them from the entryway, “Miss. Hughes?”
She jumped and wiped the tears from her eyes, “Hi, Victoria. What’s wrong, sweetheart?”
She got up and walked over to her, hearing her sniffle, “I’m not feeling good.”
“Did you go to the nurse, honey?”
She nodded back at her, “She told me that I was going home.”
“Okay, you want me to help you pack up your things?”
She nodded again, going to grab her folder from her cubby. Meanwhile, Nico was watching her with complete adoration in his eyes. Quinn noticed this and moved over to sit next to him, “You want kids with her don’t you?”
Nico looked at him with wide eyes, “What?”
“You want kids with her. It’s kind of obvious, dude.”
He nodded, “Yeah, I guess. I mean, we’re still kind of young.”
Quinn smiled, “Yeah, but when you know you know, man. She loves you, though. I know she does.”
Nico looked at him with a small grin, “You know, she didn’t even want me to come today. She said that the kids would be happy with just you guys and that she didn’t want to ruin my break.”
“That sounds like her.”
“When I told her I was coming no matter what she said I was pretty sure she was going to cry.”
“Trust me, Nico. Y/n could never go a day without you no matter how much she tries to deny it. One day when you guys had this little fight, it must’ve been when you guys just started dating, she called me crying and told me she wanted to marry you.”
“She did?”
“Yeah. I don’t think I’ve ever seen her this happy.”
Victoria was finishing up putting the last thing in her bag and she looked at her teacher, “Mr. Hischier is looking at you.”
“Oh, he is?” She looked over her shoulder and saw him looking directly at her. Both of them blushed when their eyes locked and looked away, “He was wasn’t he?”
She nodded and smiled, “Miss. Hughes?”
“Yeah?”
“I think he loves you.”
“You think?”
“Yes! And I think you two are going to get married.”
“Oh really?”
“Yeah. Okay, bye, Miss. Hughes!”
“Bye, honey. Feel better!”
❛ ━━・❪ ❁ ❫ ・━━ ❜
Later that night, Nico laid in bed with y/n, arms wrapped around her tightly as they looked at each other. Y/n lightly traced his tattoo, sending shivers through him. It had been a quiet night, the two had eaten dinner and watched a movie. It was comfortable between them, no words had to be said. Both of them, however, were thinking the same thing, back to earlier. Quinn and Victoria’s words had an impact on the respective two, both of them coming to the same conclusion of wanting to marry the other. 
Nico looked up at her through his eyelashes, she was looking down at his arms as she ran her finger over the ink. He smiled and couldn’t help himself, “Do you wanna marry me?”
She paused, her finger stopping and her mouth opening just a little in shock. She looked up at him, “What?”
“Do you wanna get married?”
“Are you serious?”
“Yeah. 100 percent.” He got up and walked over to his bag that sat at the foot of the bed, reaching in and grabbing something out, “You always told me you hated the way my bag smelled and that you wouldn't even take a step near it.”
She giggled a little, sitting up so her back was against the headboard. He walked back to the bed, sitting down by her legs, “I bought this for you a couple of months ago. It was the beginning of the season and I had just gotten back from a game. You were telling me about your day and how the kids wouldn’t stop talking about the team's win the previous night. I saw the way your face lit up when you talked about them and the game. You were so excited that they were interested in hockey. I don’t know. There was just something about the moment that made me realize that I needed to buy a ring for you. I always knew I wanted to marry you but I guess that moment just solidified it for me.”
He took a deep breath and risked a glance at her, she had tears in her eyes again, “Don’t cry, schatzi.” He held her hand before continuing, “Jack and Luke came with me the next day while you were at school. They kept pointing out random rings but none of them seemed right. The three of us were just about to give up and then I saw this one and I thought it was perfect.”
He opened the box and showed her, causing her to gasp in awe, “Oh my god, Neeks.”
“I love you, y/n and I want to be with you forever. I want to grow old with you and I want to have kids with you. I want to do it all with you.”
She nodded her head, almost screaming as she said yes. She launched herself into his arms, wrapping her legs around his waist and her arms around his neck, “I love you so much.”
“I love you too.”
A couple of moments passed, both of them basking in the moment, “Victoria told me we were going to get married. When she came back in during lunch earlier.”
“Oh, she did?”
“Mhm.”
“That’s funny, Quinn was telling me about how much you wanted to marry me earlier too.”
“He did?” A blush rose to her cheeks, “Yeah. He said that you called him after one of our small fights one day and you cried to him, saying that you wanted to marry me.”
“Oh god, that’s so embarrassing.” Her head fell into his chest and he laughed, moving his hand to run through her hair.
“Don’t be embarrassed. I think it's adorable.”
She shook her head and looked up at him, “I love you, Nico Hischier.”
“And I love you, y/n Hughes.”
❛ ━━・❪ ❁ ❫ ・━━ ❜
The next day, y/n showed up to work and immediately thought about how she was going to tell her kids. When Victoria walked in she knew what she had to do. They went through their whole routine, no one suspecting a thing. At the end of the day, she beckoned Victoria over and she skipped to her, “Yes, Miss. Hughes.”
“You know how you told me that Mr. Hishcier and I were going to get married?”
She nodded confidently, “Yep!”
“Well, can I tell you a secret?”
“Yeah!”
“He asked me to marry him last night.”
Victoria gasped excitedly, a smile gracing her lips, “Can I see the ring?”
Y/n nodded, grabbing the ring from her pocket, “It’s so pretty!”
“You wanna do me a big favor?”
“That’s when someone asks you to do something for them right?”
“Yep. You wanna tell everyone?”
She nodded excitedly, “Yeah!”
“Alright go on.”
“Hey guys! Mr. Hsichier and Miss. Hughes are getting married!”
All the kids ran around getting a huge rush of energy. They all came up to y/n and started asking her questions, “When are you getting married?”
“Sometime during the summer. Maybe next year?”
“But you hate the summer!”
“Yeah I know, but Mr. Hischier has to work during hockey season, remember? He plays from October to April every year. So I have to make a sacrifice.”
“What’s a sacrifice?”
“When you give up something for something else.”
“I’m so happy for you, Miss. Hughes.”
“Don’t you mean, Mrs. Hischier?!”
Y/n laughed and made them pack up to go home. When she got back to her and Nico’s apartment, she smiled when she saw him making a pre-dinner snack. She wrapped her arms around his torso from behind, “Hi Neeks.”
“Hi schatzi, how was your day?”
“Good. Told the kids what you asked me last night.” He turned around in her arms and smiled down at her, “Yeah?”
She rested her head on his chest, “Mhm. They were really excited.”
He wrapped his arms around her, “I’m not surprised.”
“I still can’t believe this is happening.”
“Me neither. But I’m so excited.”
“Me too. I love you.”
“I love you.”
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⬂ 𝗡𝗲𝘄 𝗝𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗲𝘆 𝗗𝗲𝘃𝗶𝗹𝘀 𝗧𝗮𝗴𝗹𝗶𝘀𝘁 ⬂
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192 notes · View notes
wordsvomit101 · 24 days
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Just some thoughts on Lucifer's chats
Credits to @shyanimeboi and their friend for sharing, cause this just gives me a newer perspective on Lucifer.
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He got me confused at first because why saying the obvious, every human has a name but then he started with Adam, Eve, and Solomon
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It gives a lot more nuance to him and other immortal and long-living characters. It makes him so not human but also human in a way. For me, as a normal person, I can barely remember the names of the people I meet every day, but if they stay long enough I can remember them or I will know them through someone I have a closer relationship with, who relates to those I don't have a strong connection with in some way, it's easier. Lucifer in this aspect is like a human to me, he is a dude who lives life slower and longer, it makes sense why he and most other characters addressed MC as "descendant of Solomon" because will MC stay long enough for their name to be embedded into these immortals creatures like how Solomon, Adam, and Eve did or just another fleeting memory.
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The "Are you not greedy?" got me thinking for a minute cause what does he mean by that but then, I think it could be an honor thing. It is normal for people to be excited to have someone to memorize their name, like wouldn't you be happy if your favorite celebrity knew your name, your existence? You would, it is something to be greedy for and to have pride in. While his second question also makes sense, because if you're scared of someone, you would rather them never know of your existence, their ignorance of you is your bliss and peace.
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And that is some philosophy Lucifer is dropping on my dumb ass, BUT, it sounds to me like he meant, the kings and the seraphim are the beings that reflect on the concept that some truths or pieces of knowledge are not learned through conventional means but are instead a natural part of our awareness and existence. This lowkey sounds so cool and so true to them being the embodiment of inherence factors that everyone has, they will have by just the mere act of becoming conscious.
And I really like that we have this route with Lucifer, getting to know each other is the starting point of every connection, it sounds so easy but probably one of the hardest stages in every relationship. Since it is the starting point, everything could go wrong or it could go great, it is unclear what to do or say and it takes time.
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And I really like Lucifer in this chat, I like the slow burn of this and I think the devs did him so well, they cooked in this.
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beomcoups · 3 months
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Caller #17
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𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: basketball player!Soonyoung x college dj reader
𝐆𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: fluff, angst, 90s au
𝐑𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠: PG-13
𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: cursing, talks of tough family dynamics, bit of heavy angst, kissing
𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐬: 8.8k
𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: You could easily name 10 things that you hate about him. But when you bond over music and families, you realize there's more to him than meets the surface.
𝐀𝐍: This was not an easy fic. It took me way longer than I planned to write, and the story I had mapped out went in a different direction. I still feel proud of this one, my longest fic yet, and I hope that you will enjoy it too 🥹 This is a part of my very own Now That's 90's collab hosted by me and @mingsolo. Thank you to @wooahaeproductions for reading this over and @hobeemin for making a banner for me at the last minute 💙
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“Thank you for calling into C.A.R.A.T radio! What’s your song of the week?” “Bittersweet Symphony by The Verve!” “You got it! Thanks for calling into C.A.R.A.T radio at 526 AM.” Hitting play on the record, the orchestra's melody hits your ears, sending you into an out-of-body experience, your soul floating to cloud nine. The hairs on the back of your neck stand every time the song is played, and you imagine yourself playing the violin, getting lost in the beautiful and complicated sinfonia.  Working at the college radio station was your life. It’s the only place to lose yourself to TLC, Nirvana, and Weezer for hours without judgment. You are in your 3rd year of college, getting your bachelor’s in music theory so you can be one of the most prominent songwriters in the world. While everyone in high school didn’t know what they would be doing with their life, you always imagined yourself getting a Grammy for Song of the Year on stage. That is your real passion: creating musical poetry for the masses.
You slowly take the headphones off and set them down, looking at the big clock plastered on the wall. You let out a heavy sigh, sad that your time at the station is ending. You are allotted two hours a day on Saturday as a part of credit for your program. If you had it your way, you would be here daily, listening to your favorite records and writing songs between commercial breaks.
“Hey,” your professor Kim calls out from her office. “Come in here before you leave.”
You gather your things to leave, looking at the station one last time before entering the smaller space. This isn’t her regular office, but it has everything you think you would need: a desk, a comfortable chair, and bookshelves full of books and ornaments for decoration. You have spent a lot of time in here, pitching new ideas for the station and getting turned down every single time.
“What's up?” You sit in the chair opposite of her.
“So we will be introducing a new segment to the radio where callers can call in and ask for advice about anything, and then you can recommend a song based on what they are calling in about.:” She pauses to take a sip of water. “I want you to be a part of it.”
You don’t answer right away. You are peeved that Professor Kim wants you to head any segment. You have never shown any initiative to want to talk to anyone who calls in besides listening to music. It’s just not your thing. You are a loner at heart, and that’s how you plan to stay.
“Why me?” You finally speak up. “There are other people who are better at this than I am. Hell, ask Emily. She has been foaming at the mouth to talk about anything other than music.”
“Because you are who I want,” she shrugs. “I see how you look when you talk about your favorite releases. You go deep with the lyrics and how you can relate that to any part of your life. You are more than the person behind the voice, and it’s time other people see that.” “Well, I am not trying to be the next Oprah or Ricki Lake,” you scoff. I just want to play music, write my songs, and do whatever I need to do for the class.”
“No one said you would be the next talk show anything,” Professor Kim retorted. “This will be considered a project, and it’s worth 20% of your grade. Plus, when you are in the industry and have sessions with the artists about the song's lyrics, don’t you need to talk to them about their life and what they need? Think about that.” You nod, feeling defeated because you know you can’t talk your way out of this. You know she is right, but you will never admit it. “Plus, it’ll be a good idea to get out of your shell and work on those social skills,” she says. “We will start in a couple of weeks, so get your mind ready because before you know it, you will be there.” You nod and leave the office, your stomach grumbling loudly as you put your headphones on and listen to the latest Backstreet Boys release. It’s a quarter past seven, and dusk officially sets in the sky as you walk across campus. Working at the radio station is the highlight of your week, as you can’t play music loud at your dorm without others complaining. Fortunately, your dorm is set where you have your own space, but the walls are thin, and you can hear everything. You considered buying noise-canceling foam to cover your door but were told it was “against” the rules. Whatever. Your stomach rumbles again, and you are determined to get a burger and fries in your stomach and drink an Oreo milkshake. You cross the street, open your bag, and grab your wallet before being met with a screeching halt from a car in front of you, its headlights blaring in your eyes. “What the fuck?” You mouth at the driver. The driver pokes his head out the window, and you instantly recognize him as Soonyoung, the star point guard of the basketball team. His black Jeep is crowded, full of guys and girls, with Usher blasting through the speakers. “I’m sorry, I wasn’t paying attention,” he waves. “Yeah, no shit,” you retort, walking to the end before the car pulls off. Jeers and boos could be heard, but you could care less. People like that always get in your way no matter what. You avoid people like that as much as people, as you don’t want to be mixed in with that crowd. Soonyoung will eventually go pro and live the NBA life, whereas you will be on the stage accepting awards, with millions of people cheering your name.
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The segment started as planned, and you sat and listened to every caller asking for advice. Most of them wanted advice on how to ask someone out for a date, makeup, and things you didn’t care about. The only thing that made it worth it was you got to pick the music to go with the advice, which allowed you to show off your taste in music, from Britney Spears to Mandy Moore, Usher, Sugar Ray, etc. It made the time go by faster as well. You look through the glass, and Professor Kim gives you a thumbs up to take the last call. Letting out a sigh of relief, you let the call ring a few times before you answer. “Welcome to C.A.R.A.T radio. You are lucky caller number 17. What’s on your mind?” “H-hello?” a tenured male voice booms through the speakers. You groan, fighting the urge to roll your eyes. “You’ve reached C.A.R.A.T radio! What’s on your mind?”
“Hey. You can use this line to ask for advice, right?”
“Yep,” you say, a bit annoyed. “Whatcha got?”
There is a lengthy pause, your fingers tapping dramatically on the soundboard. You raise an eyebrow at the professor, who shrugs and walks out of your view. You hear shuffling in the background, followed by what sounds like something being sipped from a cup.
“S-sorry, I am a bit nervous,” he apologizes. “It’s my first time calling in.”
“It’s alright,” you reassure him. “I know how it is. How can I help?”
“So I already have this path carved out for me by my family and everyone who cares about me. Sports is all I have known all my life, and I have worked very hard to get here.” He stops for a brief second. “Everyone expects me to act like this all-star college boy, and no one ever talks to me about anything else than sports, and I am starting to hate it.”
“Do you mind telling me what kind of sports you’re in?”
“I play ball.”
“Okay, that's good. Well, what is it that you want?”
“I’m tired of being what everyone wants me to be: this golden retriever everyone loves. I just want to be me.” You understood how he felt. Maybe not in sports, but people pushing you to be something you’re not. You come from a family of doctors and lawyers who expected you to be the same. “Get good grades so you can get into an Ivy League school” is all you heard growing up. When you were seven, you expressed interest in music, sitting in front of the family piano on Christmas and playing Jingle Bells, which you learned on your own. Your parents cared for a while, putting you in piano lessons and taking you all over the state for recitals. They figured if you kept this up until high school, it would look good on college applications, but nothing that they took you seriously for. It wasn’t until you learned how to play the guitar in secret that you fell in love with how the strings strummed against your fingers that you realized that your passion is music. Thanks to your choir teacher, you had a good voice and kept it in tune while practicing writing music. You soon sang in front of the school, getting high praise from people all over for your voice and how you would “make it big one day.” Your parents insisted that it was just a phase and that eventually you would become a doctor and make a “real” living. You were determined to prove them wrong by applying to one of the best music schools and getting in on a full ride. You did that, but it came with a cost: being cut off by everyone in your family but your grandparents. They believed in you from the beginning and made sure you were okay. You will pay them back in tenfold one day. “Hello?” the deep voice cut through your thoughts. “Y-yeah, sorry,” you snap back into focus. “Do you want my advice?” “Yeah, I do,” you hear him clear your throat. ‘I think you should be who you want to be. It may feel a little different at first, but eventually, you will be happier being yourself.” “I mean…” he pauses for another second. “How do I go about that? How do I show people the real me?” “Hmm,” you think out loud. “Why don’t you try easing into it? Start a random conversation about something you are interested in that no one knows about. Gauge their reactions, and if they treat you weirdly, then start making new friends. It might be a little harder with your family, but they will come around. But either way, it’s exhausting having to hide yourself at the time. It’s the 90s and a new era!” “Yeah,” he says slowly. I’ll try that.Thanks.” “No problem!” You say. “Check out this song that’ll hopefully speak to your heart. This is me signing off on CARAT Radio, 800am.” You played “You Gotta Be” by Des’ree, a personal favorite, closing out the end of your segment. Admittedly, it wasn't as bad as you thought it would be. Sure, some questions were annoying, but it allowed you to pass on music to people and help them get over whatever. You can’t call that a total loss. You push the mic to the side and leave the room, checking in with your professor before leaving. “Great job,” she leaned back into her seat. “You were well-spoken and composed, and the music selections were excellent. Have you thought about being a radio DJ?” “NO,” you snort. “I want to be more behind the scenes, writing songs and getting Grammys.” “Okay, okay,” Professor Kim chuckles. “But don’t rule it out. You are a natural at it.” You nod and head out the door with a small smile. Getting complimented about your work feels good, but you rule out being a radio DJ. You deal with people if you have to, but you prefer to have time for yourself a lot of times. You’re just introverted like that. However, that last call was in the back of your mind. You just want to live and succeed at your dream job. It was nice knowing someone out there felt the same way you did. 
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Before you knew it, a few weeks had passed, and you had secretly liked doing the segment every Saturday, talking to people from different backgrounds and listening to their troubles. You had a song for every call, and you bragged to your professor at the end of your shift that you had impeccable taste. The analytics showed that more people were tuning in during your segment than at any other time on the radio. Not gonna lie; it stroked your ego quite a bit.
The mystery guy called in on Saturdays, ironically being caller #17 every time. He would call and ask for advice about getting his grades up, coming out of his comfort zone, trying new things, etc. You got to know him a little, see how he solves problems, and see his sense of humor. You have no idea what he looked like, but you imagined he was just your type, like a Keanu Reeves, Theo Mizuhara, or Merlin Santana. Is it crazy that you sometimes daydream about a man you never met?
Today was the last day of the advice segment, and everyone called in with their usual advice and well wishes. Like clockwork, the mystery guy was caller #17. His breathing was labored when you answered, followed by a clunk of metal hitting the floor. “Welcome to C.A.R.A.T radio. You are lucky caller number 17. What’s your damage?”
“H-hey.” You know it was him; the sound of his voice was familiar to you. You shift in your seat, sitting straight and placing your elbows on the desk. You try to keep a poker face, your professor watching you with curious eyes. “Hey there,” you clear your throat. “How can I help?” “I heard today is the last day to ask for advice,” he says. “I can’t say I won’t miss calling and hearing your voice every Saturday.” “Oh yeah?” you chuckle. “ That’s good to know. Well, what is the last piece of advice that I can give you?” “So, there is this girl,” he starts. “I really like her. She’s cute, a bit of a hard ass, and I really like her mind. She’s not like anyone that I’ve met. How do I ask her out?” “Does she know you exist?” “Yeah. I almost ran into her once, but we talked a lot.” “Ah. Do you think she might like you?” “I-I’m not sure,” he stutters. “We get along and everything and we have some things in common. I just don’t know if she would be into me.” “Okay, well, it wouldn’t hurt to ask her out? The worst that can happen is that she says no; at least you’d know.” “Yeah,” he sighs. “I’m nervous as hell, that’s all. Have you dated anyone before?” You are taken aback, your professor raising her eyebrows through the glass. You nod, licking your lips before responding. “I’ve dated here and there,” you say slyly. “It wasn't anything serious. What about you?” ‘Um, yeah, I have,” he snorts.
“Well, there you go then, tiger.” You’re clearly entertained by this conversation. “Remember how you felt when you asked the other girls out, and apply that same confidence to this girl. You never know. She might say yes.” “Okay, I will take your word for it. Thank you.” “Not a problem!” You beam. “Here is the last song I leave you with: ’ 4-page letter’ by Aaliyah. Have a good night, ya’ll.”
You play the final track of the night, setting down the headphones while Professor Kim claps her hands in applause. You roll your eyes playfully, pushing your chair onto the desk and exiting the booth. You feel light as a feather, dopamine taking over your body as you meet your professor in her office. “Great job,” she smiles. “That wasn’t so bad, was it?” “Maybe,” you plop down on a chair. “It was fun giving out music suggestions.” “Mhmm,” she nods. “Well, get out there and enjoy your Saturday. I will see you in class on Friday.” You grab your things and leave the station, your stomach rumbling and your mouth parched. It’s after 8, and the nearest thing open is the local pizza joint with the best pepperoni pizza with the cheesiest cheese you’ve ever had. You go there often, and the owners, Dante and Gabriella, get your order ready before you sit down. “The usual?” they always ask, knowing that you are a creature of habit. Aside from your grandparents, they were the closest thing to family to you, always making sure your pizza was hot and crispy with a tall cup of Coke to go with it. They asked about your studies, and Gabriella always asked when you’d get a boyfriend. 
“Ah, stop it, amore mio,” Dante jokingly shushes her. “She has all her life to find the love of her life.”
More people started coming in, and they left you to your food and your walkman. You gleefully put Parmesan cheese over your pizza, taking the first bite and feeling instant gratification. A slice of heaven, literally. You take your headphones on, listening to Kurt Cobain croon on Nirvana’s Something In The Way. The “Nevermind” album got you through some tough times, especially when your family cut off communication with you. It hurt you and made you feel isolated and misunderstood. On the outside, your mom and dad put on this persona of being open-minded and willing to do anything for the family. Why were you the exception? You feel the tears well up, and you get yourself together before people start to notice, eating the rest of your pizza before you call it a night. You look around, seeing people on dates or hanging out with their friends, and you miss that. You had friends back home, but you all split up before you went to college. Who knows what their lives are like now. It’s not like you are visiting home anyway. You clean up your mess and walk into the bathroom, relieving yourself and washing your hands before returning to your dorm. You looked at yourself in the mirror: your jean jacket covered your black button-up shirt, shorts, and stockings underneath. Your eyes were slightly red, a contrast from your fresh face. Stifling a yawn, you leave and wave goodbye to Dante, opening the side door and bumping into someone in the process. You look up, facing Soonyoung, his cheerful eyes meeting yours. “We gotta stop meeting like this,” you mutter, backing up and adjusting your jacket. “Yeah, we shouldn’t,” he responds, opening the door to let you out. Your head snaps up, half expecting him to not hear you.  You rake your fingers through your hair, walking out of the restaurant. He’s a handsome guy, you can admit that, with his fresh, faded haircut and trendy clothes. You get why he is popular with everyone. “I’m sorry for almost hitting you with my car the other day,” he calls out. “It’s alright,” you turn around. “Just don’t make it a habit.” “Alright.” He chuckles and goes inside, and you speed walk to your dorm. Did I just flirt with him? You think to yourself. What the fuck was that? You aren’t even interested in Soonyoung in that way. You two are the two opposites of each other. You’re clearly losing your mind.
The cool air calms you down, and the slight breeze underneath the moonlight keeps you at bay until you get to your building. It’s Saturday night, and everyone’s out; the only sound being heard is your boots hitting the tiled floor as you walk down the hallway to your dorm. Unlocking your door, you notice an envelope tucked underneath it. You sit on the bed, open it, and pull out a letter. I know this isn't a four-page letter, but I like you. You’re funny, have good jams, and are down to earth. Did I say that you’re cute? I like talking to you every Saturday and don’t want it to stop. 
 I want to take you out to a concert on Friday. I’ll pick you up at 4 at your dorm. I know you've said yes if you’re there when I arrive. —Caller #17
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“What do you think of this?” Your former roommate and good friend, Nikki Prince, holds up a black leather jacket in your size. You asked her to go shopping with you for an outfit for tomorrow's impending date, and you needed another set of eyes. She majors in architecture and design but models on the side thanks to her striking looks. A tall, tanned skin and green-eyed beauty, she now lives with her much older chef boyfriend, Caelan, but whenever you need her, she’s always there. She’s French, stylish, and brutally honest. You loved that about her. “I dig that,” you take it from her and try it on. It fits you just right. It would be chilly, so you bought new boots, a white shirt, and black jean shorts to wear with black stockings underneath. You wanted to be comfortable as you would be on your feet all night. 
“Are you sure about this date?” Nikki’s foreign accent comes through. “How do you know this guy isn’t some serial killer? We’ve all seen Scream.” “Gee, thanks, mom,” you roll your eyes. “If he tries anything with me, I’ll just show him the moves I learned from the YMCA.” 
“I’m serious. This is risque for you, no?” You shrug, slowly taking off the jacket and heading to the cashier. “I get your point, and if anything happens, I can defend myself. But I have a feeling that it won’t happen.” You greet the cashier and pay for the jacket. “I’ll call you before I leave and tell you about it the next day. Deal?” Nikki nods, and you both walk out of the store, satisfied with what you bought. The mall is busy for a Thursday night, with young adults frolicking at stores like Rave and Wet Seal, looking for the latest fashion trends. The mall isn’t really your scene, as you prefer to thrift shop for your clothes. You have been lucky to find some hidden gems there, especially since you are on a limited budget. Nikki, however, said it was a special occasion, and you quote, “You are not going on a date in someone else’s vêtements.”
You stop at Auntie Anne’s, buying a massive pretzel with cheese on the side, while Nikki opts for a small lemonade. You offer her a piece, which she declines, saying her boyfriend, Caelan, will make her dinner later. “How is that going, by the way?” You sit down at a table. “It’s going good,” she enthuses, raking her fingers through her long black tresses. “He’s so mature and sophisticated. Imagine not having to cook and clean after a man and have good sex.” “Well, yeah, he’s about six years older,” you remark. He better know a thing or two if he wants to keep his model.” Nikki gloats as you finish your pretzel, talking about the elaborate French dishes her boyfriend makes for her and how he worships the ground she walks on. Since you’ve known her, she has always been opinionated and refused to associate with people within your age group. Whenever you see her in the hallways, she always talks with teachers or ignores the lustful looks of college boys. You two got on well because you were roommates, and both were Scorpio risings. You understood each other. “Oh shoot, I better head back to the flat,” Nikki says, looking at her watch. Caelan is going to be home soon, and he is making steak frites tonight.” 
“Yeah, I gotta head to the dorm anyway. Early class tomorrow.”
You walk out of the mall into the chilly night air. She offers you a ride home, and you decline at first, saying that you will walk as it's pretty close. But a slight wind blows, bringing chills down your spine.
“Wait,” you shout after her. “I’ll take that ride.”
The ride was short and quiet, your mind occupied with your date with this mystery stranger. Nikki was right, you don’t know him, and he could be this crazy guy. But you’re also excited; the butterflies haven’t left your stomach since Saturday. You feel like you know him, and you don’t even know his name. He is just caller #17.
She pulls up to your building, and you hug her, preparing to run inside and shower. You know Nikki is still worried and means well, even if she sometimes acts like an overbearing old sister.
“Come over tomorrow at two if you can,” you announce. “You can help me get ready and meet my date in case anything goes crazy.”
“Alright,” Nikki seems relieved. “I’ll be there.”
You shut the door and shout your goodbyes before sprinting inside.
“Love you!”
“Yeah, yeah!”
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The next day went fast, like a blur. You slept past your alarm and woke up after twelve, making you two hours late.
“Fuck, fuck, FUCK,” you shout as you scrambled out of bed and tripped over a blanket. You throw on a pair of jeans and an oversized sweater from the University, your hair in a wild ponytail as you brush your teeth and high-tailed it out the door. You ran to class, forming an apology along the way, your heart beating out of your chest. You are met, however, with a closed door and a white paper plastered on the door:
NO CLASS TODAY. ENJOY YOUR WEEKEND.
“Really?” You huffed, leaning against the wall. It’s not like you are late for class; your alarm was
set despite you being up late last night. But whatever, fuck it. You aren’t about to let this ruin your day.
The leaves flow softly with the wind as you walk back to your dorm, the sun playing hide and seek in the clouds. All you can think about is tonight and what concert you are going to. Maybe it’s a huge concert, and that’s why he is picking you up early… or perhaps it’s a local indie band at a bar. Your mind runs with endless possibilities, excitement pumping through your veins. You aren’t a hopeless romantic or a love-at-first-sight kind of person, but something about this person makes you feel good… like you finally have someone who can relate to you on some level. Granted, you have only talked with him on the phone, but you have a gut feeling and are rarely wrong about these things. You finally return to your dorm and take a well-needed shower, washing and detangling your hair with much-needed privacy. Your dorm has shared showers; you usually take them when everyone is asleep at night. Fortunately, there were only a few people, allowing you to have time for yourself. You allow yourself to think of the water running down your body as him, his hands caressing your body, his lips maybe touching yours— “Is anyone in here?” You snap out of your daydream quickly, and the water turns cold right on queue. “Y-yeah?” “I am here to clean the showers,” a woman’s voice calls from the door. “O-okay, give me a second.” Cursing silently, you quickly step out and dry yourself, throwing on your robe and grabbing your shower caddy before exiting the bathroom. You are met by an older woman wearing a shirt representing your college and sweats, with cleaning supplies in tow. “You were in there for a while,” she remarks as she sets out the wet floor sign. Do you have a hot date tonight?” “Something like that,” you shrug. You walk back to your room, and to your surprise, Nikki is outside your door. “You’re early,” you remark, unlocking the door. “Yes, I know,” she said. “But we will need more than two hours to get yourself right.” “You act like I can’t dress myself,” you scoff. “I just wanted your company, that’s all.”
“Oh yeah? Mon ami, when was the last time you changed your makeup?” You open your mouth to rebuttal but close it immediately. You hate to say it, but Nikki’s right. It’s not like you are going anywhere besides school, the music store, and the pizzeria. “Exactly,” Nikki says, setting her stuff down on her bed. “I went and got you makeup close to your teint, just in case.” She pulls out brand-new makeup from Revlon from mascaras, concealers, powders, and assortments of lipsticks of my choosing. She also bought nail polishes, saying it was time to add some color to your life. As much as you want to roll your eyes at her, she is right. As harsh as Nikki seems sometimes, she has a big heart and always looks out for you when you least expect it. You know a thing or two about style, but she takes it to a whole different level and isn’t shy about giving advice on it. You appreciate her so much. Being honest with yourself, you are nervous as hell. You have had crushes before, but you have never been pursued like this, where someone likes you enough to ask you out formerly, even if it was via a note. This person cares about your mind or seems to. You aren’t sure how to feel; you want to be excited and have a good time, but you have a wall up for a reason. You don’t want to be disappointed again like your family has. You figured if the people you love the most can abandon you like that, there is no hope for you out there. You lived with that hard truth for a long time, and you were content with that. But god, this guy has you curious. “What’s on your mind?” Nikki finishes with your makeup and hair, gazing at you through the mirror. “Butterflies in my stomach are killing me,” you grimace. “I can’t believe I am even doing this.” “Oh, relax,” she blows a raspberry. “You always do this thing where you talk yourself out of things you deserve. Stop that. D'accord? “Yes, mother,” you tease. She sucks her teeth, and you get dressed, putting on the new clothes you bought and your black leather boots. Checking out your appearance, you are satisfied with your look, and Nikki gives you a thumbs up while she cleans up. Knock, Knock! You look at the door, the butterflies fluttering deeper in your stomach. You look in the mirror one last time as Nikki opens the door, a brief silence followed by a heart chuckle. “Mon ami, your date is here.”
You see him, and you're stunned. It dawns on you why he’s here, and you feel your heart drop all the way to your ass. This has to be some kind of joke. “Soonyoung? What are you doing here?” He walks more into your view, wearing a grey jean jacket with matching pants. His right hand is in his pocket, and he has a small bouquet of irises in his other hand. “I’m here to take you to the concert?” Nikki is behind him, trying to keep her composure and mask her giggles. Of all the people you thought would show up, Soonyoung was the LAST person on your mind. This is the person who was calling in every Friday and wanting to talk to you? Yeah fucking right. “What happened?” you accost him. “Did you lose some bet, and you had to ask me out? Or do you feel bad for almost hitting me with your car?” “No?!” he scoffs, clearly offended. “I mean, yes, I feel bad about almost hitting, but no one dared me to do anything. Do you think I am that kind of person?” “Well, yes.” You wish you could take back what you said, but it was too late. You knew you hurt his feelings, the crestfallen look on his face saying it all. “This was a mistake,” he sighs dejectedly. “Sorry, I wasted your time.” He handed Nikki the flowers and walked away, the air feeling thick and awkward. You couldn’t even look at her in the eyes. You knew you fucked up. “Well, that was awkward,” you huff. “And shitty.” You raise an eyebrow at her, and she stares you down. You don’t want to feel worse than you already do, and Nikki isn’t helping. “Honestly, I think the guy was telling the truth,” Nikki surmises. “He looked like a sad puppy.” You think about this caller #17 guy who would call in every week and share his thoughts with you about everything, with you having to do very little. You think about how scared he felt about being his true, authentic self and how much courage it probably took to ask you out. You know you are a tough cookie to crack and understand better than anyone how it feels to go against the grain and be who you are. “I fucked up Nik,” you slump on your bed. “Yeah, you did.” God, you hate her bluntness sometimes, but she’s right. You need to go find him and make this right. “Do you think he’s still here?” you ask, sitting up and grabbing your purse. “He couldn’t have left that fast.” “Only way to find out is to get off your ass and find him,” she says, pulling your arm. “Go find your guy.” You both rush out of your dorm, jogging down the hallway and out of the building, looking for a silhouette of him. You were scared you missed him and felt defeated, not seeing any sight of him anywhere. Surveying the area one last time, you noticed a black Jeep peeling out of the parking lot. It stops at the stop sign, the second to last car to go. This is your only chance. “WAIT!”
You sprint towards the car, barely meeting him as he is about to turn.
“STOP,” you exhale, relieved that you caught him. “Don’t go.” Soonyoung steps out as you rest your hands on the hood of his car, trying to catch your breath. He touches your arm, his hands soft as silk, sending shocks throughout your body.
“Are you okay?” He asks, taking a good look at you.
“Aside from me about to pass out, I’m good.” You take a deep breath. “Listen. I’m sorry. I was a jerk and an asshole and—”
“MOVING YOUR FUCKING CAR!”
A middle-aged woman leans out of the window and gives you the bird, followed by a slew of car horns beeping in annoyance behind you and Soonyoung.
“Fuck,” Soonyoung curses, realizing the amount of cars behind him. “Get in the car.”
You both get in the car and drive off from the angry drivers, pulling into the nearest gas station. You sit with your hands in your lap, this weight of regret sitting on your chest and guilt eating you from the inside. You look at him, and he seems surprisingly relaxed as if you didn’t reject him
not even thirty minutes ago.
“I’m going to get some gas,” he announces. “Wait here.” 
You watch him walk inside to pay and let out the deepest, most agonizing sigh. He should be calling you every name in the book, and rightfully so, as you insulted him. Why is he being so nice? Does he really like you that much?
He returns a few minutes later, shoving his pockets with change left over, and you both lock eyes with each other. In another situation, you would’ve been able to appreciate his good looks, trendy clothes, and tiger-like appearance. But instead, you feel sick to your stomach, disappointed in how you acted. You look down, twiddling your thumbs until he finishes pumping his gas and returning to the car. This is not like you at all. “Hey,” he says. “Hi,” you stammer. “I’m sorry again. I feel like a terrible person, and I shouldn’t have bit your head off like that.” “I know you were intense, but Jesus Christ,” he exhaled. “Why do you think I wouldn’t be interested in you? You made it seem like I lost a bet to ask you out. You made me feel like crap.” Every word felt like a punch in the gut, and you deserved it. Despite your parents' many flaws, they always taught you not to judge a book by its cover, and that’s precisely what you did. You were pretentious and stuck up about him. In some ways, you aren’t any different from them. “I guess…” your voice trails off. “I just saw you as the athlete that everyone is in love with. Your friends, I know the type, and we’ve never really crossed paths with each other unless I was bumping into you or almost getting hit by your car.” “So… you saw me as the very thing I told you I didn’t want to be seen as.” You didn’t have to answer back. You both knew the answer, and it was eating you up inside. “I’m sorry, I am just gonna go.” Before he could stop you, you exited the Jeep and started walking back toward your dorm. You are embarrassed and can never face him again. This is why you don’t don’t talk to anyone. This is awkward; it feels weird. You lose yourself in your thoughts until you reach the street light, waiting for your turn to go. The air is slightly chilly than usual, the smell of the ocean taking over your senses that you would enjoy any other time. Yeah, a walk to the beach sounds nice, you say to yourself just as the street signal turns green. You feel someone’s hand pulling you away, and you twirl around, facing Soonyoung’s back as he takes you back to his car.
“You’re dramatic as hell, you know that, right?” He shouts over his shoulder. “You didn’t even let me respond; you just hopped out like you were on the run.” 
You stayed silent. What more could you say? He was right. He opens the passenger side, letting you slide in and shutting the door behind you. A few seconds later, he is on your other side, turning on the ignition. 
“You not a terrible person,” he breathes. “A terrible person wouldn’t come sprinting out of their doom in boots and a nice outfit trying to apologize. You said you’re sorry, and it’s fine.” “Is it?” 
“I mean, I’ll get over it,” he shrugs. “I wouldn’t have pulled you back here if I didn’t want to be around you. Now, do you still want to go back and forth about this, or do you want to make it up to me by going to this concert?” It’s a brief moment of silence as you seriously consider your options. You can tell Soonyoung is still bothered by what you did, but his small smile clarifies your decision. “Lead the way, tiger.”
He chuckles as he pulls out of the lot, pulling into a line of cars headed in the same direction. The sun starts to set, the golden hour hitting the horizon at the sea. You fold your arms, confused as to why he is being so nice to you, despite you being a bitch to him earlier. You haven’t felt forgiveness in a long time, which feels foreign. Uncomfortable. You hope this feeling will go away as the night goes on.
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You mainly rode in silence aside from the music on the radio, and the hour trip to the venue seemed to be double that. You pull up to Bayfront Amphitheater, packed to the brim with people screaming their hearts out to the band onstage. Your heart skips in excitement, realizing what concert Soonyoung took you to. 
“The Foo Fighters?” you grin, unbuckling your seatbelt. “I’ve been wanting to see them forever.: “Yeah, I remember you were talking about it on the radio, so I figured why not,” his voice trails off. 
Your heart feels like it is going to burst at the seams. This is the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for you, and you had the nerve to be a bitch to him earlier. 
“Hey,” you clear your throat. “I’m sorry again. I feel really shitty about it.”
“I know,” he says. “Look, let’s just enjoy this concert, and I’ll forget about it, okay?” You nod, walking towards the loud music. The rhythm of the drums and guitar blended together, hyping the crowd. You let Soonyoung lead the way, checking your tickets and guiding you to your seats. The crowd is thick, with the smell of cigarettes and alcohol flowing freely, and everyone is caught in their own zone. You wouldn’t say you are claustrophobic, but being packed like sardines isn’t your definition of a good time. Soonyoung notices your discomfort and grabs your hand, holding tight until he finds your assigned seats. You felt safe with him, a tiny spark in you that made you swoon. 
“Are you okay?” He shouts over the noise. “Do you want a beer or anything?” “Nah, I’m good,” you shake your head. 
The opening act finishes their set, the crowd politely cheering as the members walk off the stage. There is a small intermission, with people disbursing from their seats to grab drinks or making quick trips to the bathroom. You can feel Soonyoung looking at you, his eyes burning into the left side of your face. You lick your lips and pull strands of your hair to the back of your ear, a blatant attempt at flirting. 
“Are you gonna stare at me all night?” You feel bold, turning your body towards him. “I might,” he purrs. “I have a beautiful, mysterious girl sitting beside me.”
“I’m not that mysterious. We’ve been talking for weeks.” ‘Yeah, in front of thousands of people on the radio. Now I have you all to myself, and I want to get to know the real you.”
“Uh huh,” you nod. “Well, I’m always the same on and off air. You’ll see.” “I hope so.” He smiles at you, and gotta admit the man can flirt. Soonyoung is devastatingly handsome, and he’s quick with his words. It excites you. You like being around people you can banter with and not take shit personally. It takes a load off your shoulders, not having to hold yourself back every time. You just want to be you and be free. It feels like Soonyoung is chasing the same thing. 
“I wouldn’t have predicted you’d be into rock bands like the Foo Fighters. What made you want to go to their concert aside from me?”
“Well, you might be surprised to hear this, but I actually like the band,” he laughs. “I’ve been following them since their debut.”
“Really?” you say. “That’s cool.” “What?” Soonyoung leans closer, your shoulder barely touching his. “Do I not seem like the Foo Fighters type?” “Aht aht,” you playfully wave your finger at him. “I’m not getting tripped up on that question.” You fell into a rhythm of laughter that felt natural as if you had been doing this all your life. Despite your fuck up, he makes you feel cozy and open. The sun makes one final appearance, shining its glorious light on his beautiful, tanned skin. You can fully admit to yourself that he’s handsome as fuck, taking him all in before the sun dips below the horizon. “No, but seriously, I don’t seem like the type to be into them?” You pause before responding, being careful with your answer. “On the surface, no. But I am learning that there is more to a person than meets the eye.” There is a comfortable silence between you two, the sweet-smelling breeze keeping you at bay as you sit and enjoy each other’s company. You have so much you want to say but don’t simultaneously. You savor this tiny bit of peace with him. “I think I am gonna grab a drink,” Soonyoung gets up suddenly. “Do you want anything?” “Yeah, like a juice or something.” You watch him leave, checking out his ass as he stands in the concessions line. Nice and firm, definitely a football player’s ass. You look away before being caught, watching the crew prepare for the next act. You feel like a young girl who just realized you have a crush on a boy. You’re giddy inside, hypersensitive to everything around you and how you look. You hope he finds you as attractive as he says he does, or if not, keep up the lie a little longer. You’ve been dealt many disappointments in your life, and you can’t let this be one of them. 
“Here. I got you a lemonade.”
You gaze up at Soonyoung, carefully grabbing the cup from his hand. He has a cup of beer in the other, sipping before making a face. You laugh in your cup, tasting your sweet drink with some tart. You feel refreshed and a little bit alive, thanks to him. “Ladies and gentlemen, who’s ready for the FOO FIGHTERS?”
The crowd erupts into a roar as the band joins the stage, getting their placements to perform. Jolts of electric excitement course throughout your body, screaming your heart out before the first string is played on the guitar. You’ve always wanted to see them in concert, being a huge fan of Nirvana and following Dave Grohl after. Despite everything, he seems like a rad guy, and
if you ever had the opportunity, you would want to pick his brain and jam out with him. “ARE YOU MUTHAFUCKERS READY?” Dave Grohl shouts into the mic. 
 You both scream as the first song is played, the drums scratching the excellent part of your brain while the guitars take you to another level. You look at Soonyoung, his attention on the band with his arms folded, in awe of the performance being given. He looks adorable, and all you can do is smile, satisfied that you are in this space and can experience this moment. The band keeps playing hit after hit, the energy around you making you want to levitate in the clouds. You haven’t been this happy in a long time. You reach the last song of the night, and the key changes, the guitars riffing into a song you know all too well. “I want everyone to sing this song with us— this is for the regular heroes out there.” 
You feel the emotion and intensity in Dave Grohl’s voice, making you emotional. The song is about the ordinary person and their potential; you wish your family saw your potential. You wish you could share your music with them and see you thrive in the elements you’re most comfortable in. But instead, you’ve been cast out, and as much as you worked hard to get over it, it hurts you deeply. “Are you okay?” Soonyoung looks at you wide-eyed; you’re unaware of the tears trickling down your face. All you want to do is be held and told everything will be okay. As if he read your mind, he holds your hand, his thumb rubbing your palm softly, keeping you anchored in your emotional storm. Nothing else needed to be said between you two; the song lyrics moved your spirit. Kudos, my hero
Leavin' all the mess
You know my hero
The one that's on
There goes my hero
Watch him as he goes
There goes my hero
He's ordinary
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“Thank you for taking me to the concert. I had a really good time.”
You sit with Soonyoung in his car, sitting outside of your dorm. You talked about music all the
way back home, singling your hearts out to whatever is on the radio. Soonyoung is surprisingly a good singer, hitting some notes even better than you can. You wonder if he had any training. “I’m glad I was able to make it up to you,” he grins. “Oh, please,” you wave him off. I’m the one who started us on the wrong foot.” “True. But I think you more than made up for it tonight.” “Yeah, yeah,” you roll your eyes playfully. “Can I ask you something?” “Sure.” 
“Why were you crying during the concert?” You knew this question would come eventually, but you still felt unprepared. You hadn’t really talked about your family life with anyone besides Nikki, but you were determined to keep it to yourself. But he makes you want to open up. “The song really hits me,” you point at your chest. “I feel every word and every percussion note as it plays. It reminds me of my mom and dad, and I wish they saw me as a normal person with their own aspirations rather than the person they want me to be. It was so quiet that you could hear a pin drop. Soonyoung nodded his head, understanding what you were saying. 
“My parents wanted me to be a doctor or a lawyer, and I just don’t see myself doing that. I fell in love with music and singing, and when I shared that I wanted to do songwriting full-time, they made me feel so low. Like I am stupid and naive for wanting a career, I would actually be happy.” You huff, wiping fresh tears off of your face. “I just wanted them to support me, but they couldn’t even do that. Aside from my grandparents, they cut me off completely.” “That’s not cool,” Soonyoung scoffs. “So they just went cold turkey and quit talking to you?” You nod, bitterly reliving the last conversation you had with them before you made no contact. “Why can’t our parents just let us live the lives we want? It’s like they want to live vicariously through us.” “Right?!” You exclaim. “See, you get it!”
“Unfortunately, yeah,” he mumbled. You turn your body to look at him, studying his face and the possible thoughts he is having. You may see more eye to eye than you realize. ‘So, what’s your damage?” You poke at him. “It’s the same as yours,” he revealed. “They just want me to keep playing basketball so I can go into the big leagues and take care of everyone. I am essentially everyone’s meal ticket.” “Well, you don’t have to be,” you say. “You could just say fuck ‘em and live for yourself.” “Easier said than done,” he sighs. “I’m the first person in my family to attend college, and I actually like playing basketball. I believe in it, bleed it, all that… but whenever I am around my folks or friends, that’s all they want me to be about it. It’s like I’m not real. I am a person with complex interests and feelings, too.” 
“I know exactly what you mean, tiger.” 
You smile reassuringly; you understand that last sentence all too well. Your family would rather consider you the family fuck up, the black sheep, instead of understanding that you wanted different things. Why is that so fucking complicated? You stifle a yawn, looking at your watch and seeing how late it was.
“I really like talking to you and being around you,” Soonyoung confesses. I hope we can do it more.” “Yeah,” you gaze into his eyes. “ I would love that.” He walks you to your dorm, opens the doors, and holds your waist as you walk up the steps. His hands bring jitters and butterflies in your stomach that you hope you can experience more. You know you have a hard, cold exterior on the outside, but deep down, you want to feel love and adoration from someone. You hope Soonyoung can bring that. 
You never want this feeling to go away.
“Thank you for walking me in,” you say, unlocking the keys to your room. “I know I was being a bitch early, but thank you for showing me a good time anyway.” 
“It was worth it, seeing a smile on your face.” 
“Was it?” 
“Yeah,” he leans in closer. “I want to see it more.”
His lips touch yours, your chest bursting like fireworks as he deepens the kiss. Your arms rest on his shoulders, feeling natural and comfortable like a glove. He is gentle and kind, not doing too much but making you feel safe and like you can depend on him. It's crazy how one kiss can have you seeing your future. 
“We should do that more often,” you joke, leaving one last peck. He chuckles, pulling you into a hug. “We will. I’ll make sure to do it more often.” 
“Okay,” you say, walking into your dorm. “I’ll hold you to it.”
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kooruphobic · 1 year
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WILL YOU BE MY VALENTINE? — armin arlert/reader
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𓆩♡𓆪 tags : sub!armin, tease!reader, armin has a crush (on you), and is definitely helplessly in love, kissing, begging (slightly), vaginal sex, jean kirstein is a bitch, armin thinks about voueyrism(?), smut
𓆩♡𓆪 word count : 2.7k
𓆩♡𓆪 summary : armin has been pining after you for years. when the two of you end up alone in his room, he finally works up the courage to ask you to be his valentine. but in the end, he gets a little more than what he asked for.
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Armin likes you. Everyone knows—Eren, Mikasa, Jean, Connie, Sasha—it’s a universal fact at this point. Even people who aren't in your close circle know.
He’s liked you for years. Ever since Eren introduced the two of you he fell in love at first sight. Armin wasn’t gifted with the courage to flirt with girls as Eren does, so he’s admired you from afar instead. Everyone notices how he looks at you and how he blushes when you get close to him. One time, when your entire friend group was hanging out, there were no more spots on the couch so you asked if you could sit on his lap as a joke. His entire face went completely red in seconds. He managed to choke out a quiet “yeah,” and for the few weeks following Armin had to face relentless teasing from the entire group. 
Truth be told, you knew what you were doing. You always know what you're doing. Even though he doesn't think you know, it's quite obvious to you that Armin has a crush. Teasing him when you all hang out together is probably one of your favorite pastimes. You enjoy the way he struggles to get out the right words when you compliment him or how his eyes go wide and his cheeks flush rosy-pink when you flirt. 
If you're being honest with yourself, you might also have a little crush on him. Armin is very pretty. You like his blonde hair and how his soft blue eyes compliment them. His smile is super cute, too. He’s always nice to you (probably because he likes you) but he’s always careful with what he says and has never done anything to make you uncomfortable. You would ask to date him, but you find no fun in making the first move. Imagining Armin being flustered as he’s confessing to you is something you picture almost every time you see him.
Today is the 14th of February. It's a day that people either love or hate: Valentine’s Day. Since nobody in the friend group is dating anyone, you decided to spend Valentine's Day with each other. Armin offered for everyone to come over to his place and you did. You all played games (almost losing friendship over an Uno match), ate, drank, and talked about stupid things. It was like any other typical hangout you guys had.
Or so Armin thought. With the way his friends are, he shouldn't have been surprised when they all left to go “pick up” something. Jean was the one who urged you to stay with Armin, insisting he couldn't just be left alone even though Armin kept telling you it was fine.
And now the two of you are in his room, sitting on the edge of the bed, talking about nothing in particular. 
“...And I always lose when we play anything card related. You guys are plotting against me or something,” you laugh softly, slightly tilting your head. You ask him a question but your words simply go through one ear and out the other. The only thing Armin can focus on is how pretty you look next to him. He eyes your chest and eventually trails down the rest of your body, practically undressing you with his eyes.
“Armin?”
You wave a hand in front of him, breaking him out of his trance. He realizes he’s been staring at you for a little too long, and he immediately begins coming up with one hundred different excuses for himself.
“I’m sorry, I just spaced out for—”
“What were you thinking about?”
You.
“I-I dunno. Just stuff, I guess.”
Armin’s cheeks are dusted rose-pink and he can feel the blood rush to his face. He’s praying you don't notice his flushed appearance (you do, though). You giggle at his sudden shy demeanor, despite him talking so confidently with you just a few minutes before.
“You can tell me, I won’t judge.”
You will judge. How can he possibly tell you straight-up he was thinking about you? 
“It's nothing, really. Did you ask something earlier?” he questions, trying to change the subject.
You smile. Earlier you asked if he had a valentine. You know the answer already, you just want to see him become a stuttering mess.
“I asked if you have a valentine.”
Armin's eyes widen for a second and he quickly looks around the room, finding something to focus on so he’s not looking at you. 
Of course, he doesn't have a valentine. He wants it to be you, but there's no way he has enough courage to do that. Armin has done the math. There's a ninety-nine-point-nine chance of him getting rejected, so it's kind of silly to confess knowing he’ll get his heart broken.
He’s heard it a million times from his friends every year: “Just do it. The worst she can say is no,” but that's just it. Every time a guy thinks the worst she can possibly say is “no” the outcome is the complete opposite and they get rejected in ways ten times worse. Armin doesn't have any personal experience with that, but he’s certainly seen what other guys have been through.
But then he starts thinking, what if you do say yes to him? What if the point one percent of you not rejecting him actually pulls through? Armin feels a small sense of confidence. It wouldn't hurt to confess…right? He’s liked you for years so why not just tell you and get it over with? He does have the perfect opportunity. Maybe watching Eren flirt with all those girls has given him some second-hand experience.
Armin stops staring at the pencil on his desk and returns his gaze to you. You still have your head tilted to the side, patiently waiting for an answer.
“...Yeah.”
The little confidence he had in himself left and was replaced with immediate regret. Why did he say that? He didn't even say it as a normal person would. His voice came out quiet and shaky. Where was he even going with this?
“Oh, really?” you smile again, a hint of amusement in your voice. “Who is it?”
“Well—”
“Is it someone I know?” you place a hand on his chest, pushing him back onto the bed. “Am I friends with them?”
Armin's heartbeat quickens tenfold, and instead of feeling the blood rush straight to his face, it goes straight to his dick. He’s hard and all you’ve done is put one hand on hand on him. 
You give him an innocent look and place a knee between his legs, acting as if you don't know what you're doing. 
“What's wrong, Armin? You're so quiet.”
What's wrong? What's wrong is that your knee is pressing against his hard-on and you're above him, hand still resting on his chest. There's no way you're doing this as a joke. It has to be on purpose, right? You're not just messing with him?
“You…you do know her,” he manages to say, closing his eyes and letting out a sharp breath.
 You lean forward and your lips ghost the shell of his ear. 
“Tell me about her then,” you whisper, “because it seems that you like her a lot.”
Armin swallows and places a shaky hand on top of yours, gazing at you with desire evident in his eyes. 
“She’s really pretty. I’ve liked her for a long time…” he trails off when you run your hand down his abs, but picks up again when you stop. “I haven't actually asked her yet.”
“Hmm. Why? Are you scared?” your voice takes on more of a sultry tone.
“N-no. Not exactly.”
“I think…” you tuck a stray strand of hair behind his ear, “that you should ask her right now.”
Armin looks up at you and stares. There's no way you're just joking. He’s used to your teasing—Armin always thinks it's just to mess with him—but you’ve never taken it this far. You have to like him too, right? Why would you go to these lengths just to mess with him? He realizes just how embarrassed he is and how embarrassing it would be if he really asked you to be his valentine. Armin would feel like he was in the sixth grade again, which is definitely not something he’d like to feel. 
You graze your lips against his, cupping his face with your hand. 
“C’mon, Armin. I know you like me. Just ask.”
He feels his face heat up again. For a second, he thinks he’s dreaming because there’s no possible way this could be real. But it is. It is real. It’s real and you’re telling him to ask you to be his valentine.
“Will you—will you be my valentine?”
He cringes slightly at his words but seeing the way you smile against his lips makes everything worth it.
“Of course I will.”
Armin swallows again as you stare at him for a few moments. He follows your eyes as they move down to his lips. As if asking for permission, you move forward ever so slightly. He thinks about it for a moment, wondering what would happen if the others came back and walked into the room. How would they react if they saw the two of you like this, your knee in between his thighs and faces so close you can feel each other's breath? They most definitely wouldn’t be surprised, but if you took it any further than a one-time thing…
He decides not to think about it any longer and closes his eyes, letting his lips find yours and kissing you. Armin kisses softly at first, but eventually, you start kissing back, and he loses himself. The kiss grows sloppier but it doesn’t matter to him. This is all he’s ever wanted. The number of times he’s fallen asleep fantasizing about your soft lips on his—he can’t even count them on his fingers anymore. Armin wraps his arm around your waist and pulls you closer to him. 
You taste sweet, a mix of chocolate and alcohol from earlier. It’s intoxicating. Everything about you is intoxicating. The way you smell, the way you feel, the way you touch. He hadn’t noticed you were running your hands down his body until you reached in between his thighs. Your hands lingered there, unmoving. He moans into the kiss, quiet but still loud enough that you hear. 
You kiss him for a few moments longer then break away. Armin is panting, his ears burning and eyes blown with lust. You’ve turned him into a mess with one kiss.
“Please,” is the only word he says, looking down at your hand still between his thighs. 
You tug his shirt, a sign for him to take it off, and he obliges. He throws it to the side carelessly, doing the same with his pants. 
You’ve seen Armin without a shirt before but you’ve never realized how good he looks. He has washboard abs, a slender waist, and a complimenting v-line—you can’t help but stare for a few seconds. You run your hands down his abs, trailing all the way down to his boxers. You hook your fingers around the waistband and pull them down, his hard cock lightly hitting his stomach. There’s already pre-cum leaking from his tip. 
“What do you want me to do, Armin?” you ask, wrapping your fingers around his length. 
He looks at you through half-lidded eyes. He doesn’t care what you do to him, he just wants more of you in any way possible. 
“Anything.”
You grin and pull your shirt off, then your shorts, then your bra. Besides your panties, you’re completely bare. Armin admires how perfect you look in front of him. He’s touched himself to the thought of you naked before, but nothing he imagined in that pretty little head of his amounted to how good you looked in person.
You go in for another kiss and soon enough he’s pushing inside of you, slowly enough to make sure he doesn’t hurt you. You moan into the kiss, rolling your hips onto his. 
“Wait—no condom?” 
“It’s ok. On the pill,” you intertwine your fingers with his and press your lips onto his again. Armin bottoms out into you and groans. You realize just how big Armin actually is. He places his hands around your waist and hugs you closer, holding you tight as if he’s scared he’ll lose you. 
You start moving up and down on his cock and eventually, Armin starts meeting you halfway. The two of you waste no time taking it slow, he’s desperate for you, and—even though you haven’t really shown it—you’re desperate for him. When Armin kissed you your thighs clenched, but he didn’t seem to notice. 
The room that was once filled with you and Armin’s innocent bickering and teasing was now filled with obscene sounds—from how he pistoned up into your wet pussy to his sweet whimpers—it turned on Armin so, so much.
You squeeze around him, enjoying his whimpers and breathy pants. And just as you were both chasing your high, coming close even though it hasn’t been that long, you hear the front door open and the sounds of your friend's laughter follow. Armin stops and looks at his closed bedroom door, a panicked expression on his face. A knock sounds on the door, Connie’s voice coming from the other side.
“Are you two good in there?”
Armin opens his mouth to answer but only a broken sob comes out as you slam your hips back down onto him. You continue, smiling down at him, acting like nothing is wrong. He looks at you with his eyes widened, biting his hand to stop himself from letting out any more sounds.
“Go on, answer him. You don’t want him to think there’s anything wrong, do you?” 
He grabs your waist with his free hand in an attempt to stop you, but he’s so weak from the pleasure that it does absolutely nothing. Tears prick at his eyes, from the embarrassment of being almost caught by one of his friends and how good he feels.
“I bet you secretly want it to happen. For Connie to come in here and see what we’re doing.”
You’re right, he does secretly want it to happen. He wants Connie to open the door and see the expression on his face at the sight of the two of you. He wants him to see the way you go down onto his cock, taking him so well and him enjoying everyone second of it. Armin isn’t even thinking straight anymore, purely driven by lust. He begins to thrust back up into you, tears rolling down his cheeks. Everything feels better than before; you feel impossibly tighter around him and he feels so good. There are no other words to describe it. 
“Hello?”
“We’re fine. Just give us a few moments, we’re talking about somethi—”
Armin stops mid-sentence because feels close, hips stuttering. He feels the way your pussy spasms around him and notices the way your eyes roll back. You’ve already come but he’s not done yet.
“I’m sorry,” is all he manages to choke out as he continues to push into you. He grabs your hips again and thrusts roughly, his rhythm growing messy and inconsistent. You’re overstimulated and you try to say something, but your jaw goes slack as he keeps going. He chases the high he was so close to earlier and finally reaches it, a string of broken sobs and moans coming spilling from his mouth. Armin’s loud and he knows it, but it doesn’t matter to him anymore. He pulls you into one final, messy kiss and closes his eyes, breath heavy. 
There’s a moment of silence and suddenly you hear roars of laughter through the door. 
“I fucking told you! You all owe me fifty dollars,” Jean’s voice echoes through the house, followed by a chorus of groans from the rest of your friends.
“You’re such a fucking bitch, dude.” Connie’s voice is clear at first, becoming quieter and muffled as he moves away from the bedroom door.
You look at Armin and he looks at you. You laugh and he gives you a shy, embarrassed smile.
“Oops.”
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𓆩♡𓆪 note : this was supposed to be posted on valentines day. . .obviously. i posted it on ao3 on feb 15, and decided to post here too after awhile.
happy late valentines day!
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i have a plan for punctuation day everyone! so here's what i want you all to do!
my goal for the day is to get punctuation trending. is this too ambitious? maybe, but i don't care. i want everyone to appreciate punctuation a little
what are some things i can do you ask? well let's look at some things i could think of:—
you can make a post with every punctuation on it (but try, and here's the hard part) to put some text around it and not just list them all out
you can make up a new punctuation mark! for inspiration i would look at the works of people like hervé bazin, martin k specktor, or other people who tried to invent new punctuation
you can make a post about your favorite punctuation mark and why you like it
you can post anything related to punctuation really, those were my ideas but feel free to. i dunno. dress up as an interrobang or make art or something. go wild
so everyone! mark your calendars! september twenty fourth is the day we get #punctuation trending!
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starryriize · 4 months
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jellyfish melody | leehan
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— ✧ • ˳೫˚ part of my valentine event!
೫ pairing: uni bf! leehan and med-student gf! reader
೫ summary: in which your boyfriend arranges a dinner at the local zoo
೫ genre/word count: fluff, rlly cute ngl !! 555 words!
೫ author's note: hehe i giggled while writing this and honestly, cute idea...took me awhile to write abt it tho. i've never been to an aquarium restaurant so i'm not sure if the fish is next to you? either way, i hope you guys enjoy <3 ilysm 🫶🏼
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7:30 pm -
"You must like them." Gesturing towards the sparkly fish that you'd been staring at, "That's the electric blue acara. It's known for its vibrant blue that glints in the sun." He explains calmly, eyes sparkling as he twirls his fork around the pasta aimlessly. As soon as your class ended, he texted you that he'd come pick you up and take you for dinner.
So, here you were, at your local zoo's aquarium, having dinner with your boyfriend. If there was one thing that you loved about your boyfriend, it was how precious he got when explaining anything related to fish. But what you maybe loved more was him, and how attentive he was to you.
"And that's the nemo one, I know you like that one." You smile, staring at the fish that he pointed at, and intently listening to every word he said. Letting out a quiet giggle, you add, "If I was a fish, which one would I be?" He turns back to you, eyes searching you in curiosity. God, you were just as weird as he was. He giggles before letting out a fit of laughter. "Which...hahaha...that's cute, love. You'd be the lopsided, klutzy one!!" You put your fork down, mid-chew, in fake anger. "LOPSIDED? Excuse me, sir." You roll your eyes, playfully pointing to the blue, oddball-looking fish, “Then you’re the…oh! the weird blue one!” He laughs, thinking about how cute you are, and how he's probably the luckiest man in the world to have you.
Without thinking, he blurts out, "I love you." You swallow your sip of water, putting it down as you reply, "I know, and I love you." A small smile graces your face, eyes sparkling under the dim restaurant lights. Reaching your arm across the table, you softly take his hand. He laces your fingers between his own, bringing your hand to his face to press a light kiss on your knuckles. "Tonight was really amazing, Hannie." When those words fall from your lips, you truly do mean it. It wasn't just the delicious food or the ambiance of the place; you loved how your boyfriend always knew what made you happy.
He grins, overjoyed that you liked the little thing he'd planned. Leehan knew that you would end up forgetting about Valentine's Day; most likely caught up in studying for medical school. So, he took it upon himself to treat you to a little something. "Ah, anything for my sunshine. Shall we, love?" He grins, getting up from his seat, and offering his arm for you to take. "Yes. We shall." You happily get up, taking his arm in yours, grinning up at him.
The sound of laughter could be heard from your table in the corner of the restaurant, as you both gathered your coats while discussing the various types of fish. You guys had talked about everything, from the emotionless eyes to acting like fish, making "bloop, bloop" noises at each other. A perfect date, or perhaps...a perfect date after Valentine's Day. It was times like these that you both loved the most. In every universe, you knew that you would somehow find each other and that Leehan would always be your favorite oddball. And little do you know, he knows that you're his favorite weirdo too.
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hotvintagepoll · 4 months
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Welcome to the HOT AND VINTAGE MOVIE STARS tournament! We are now finished with the Hot & Vintage Men Tournament; The Hot & Vintage Movie Women Tournament is ongoing. Submissions for hot vintage women are now closed, but we are accepting propaganda for those already in the bracket.
Round 1 of the Hot & Vintage Women Tournament began with 540 hot women in prelims. Round 1 starts Saturday, March 2nd, with posts going up over several days. All polls—including ongoing polls, previous rounds, old tournaments, the various shadow brackets, and fun mini polls—can be found in the #hotvintagepoll tag. Every poll in the Hot & Vintage Women Tournament will be tagged with the hot woman in it if you need to search for a hot woman in particular.
FAQs:
“Where is [my favorite hot woman]?” It depends. Are all the Round 1 polls up yet? Have you checked all the polls in the tag? Have you done a tag search for her? If you still haven’t found her, either nobody submitted her or she did not fit the criteria of being a movie woman from 1910-1970.
“Can I still submit hot women?” No, the submission window has closed. Please do not send in women you wish had made it into the bracket. I can’t do anything with those asks and they just make me sad.
“I have additional propaganda for the hot women!” Great! Send me an ask or reblog the poll and add your propaganda to it. If you see a separate post that relates to your hot woman, like a fancam or a gifset, you can tag me in it. I don’t boost all the propaganda I see or receive, but I try to boost the best of the best.
If you’re submitting propaganda for your hot lady, I don’t accept propaganda that’s from beyond the end of this tournament’s era (ie don’t send me pics of them from before 1910 or after 1970). I also don’t accept propaganda of TV appearances unless it’s clearly a cameo where they’re playing themselves. If you have a TON of photos to submit, please send a few asks instead of one long one. I watch every video I receive so I can add trigger warnings, so please don't send long videos—I don't have time to review them.
I don’t post or boost negative propaganda about any hot woman. If you really hate that a certain hot woman is winning, send me positive propaganda for their hot opponent. If you think a hot woman shouldn’t even be included in the tournaments because of scummy things she did in her lifetime, please read my take on it here.
If I see repetitive, trolling, and/or bigoted remarks in the comments, I may block you from this bracket. If you want to point out a hot woman’s flaws or misdemeanors, that’s fine, but if I see consistent bad-faith trolling, you will be blocked.
The views expressed in the propaganda are not my own. I don’t submit my own propaganda, and I don’t change what’s submitted beyond fixing spelling mistakes. If you hate a poll bio or a pic, let me know and send me something I can use instead. Thoughtless bitching will get blocked.
"Where are the hot men?" Most of them are in the shadow realm! Toshiro Mifune was crowned the winner of the Hot & Vintage Men Tournament, and the rest were banished where the sun never shines. You can find all the round 1 matchups here (thank you @markwatnae!), or you can search the archive by tag to find out more about what happened to all the different hot men.
"Why didn't my propaganda make it into the poll post?" Either I couldn't open the link, or there was so much submitted I could only pick a few. Because this tournament is so much bigger than the Hot & Vintage Men one, I'm limiting propaganda to 5 pics per hot lady for Round 1. I know, a bummer! I have to do it this way to keep myself sane. If you have a photo you really want the world to see, follow the propaganda guidelines above.
“My FAQ isn’t on here :(” send me an ask! I love hearing from you guys—just please check these basics first.
Thank you for being here! Enjoy the tournament.
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accio-victuuri · 5 months
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Bojunyixiao’s Weibo night 2023/2024 🎉🎉
can you believe we’re here again. no matter how problematic sina weibo is as a platform, their awards night is a day cpfs look forward to because our boys will be attending. even if we know they won’t interact or anything, the fact that they get to attend the same event is enough for us.
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i will just include the recap for the past years on here, the 2019/2020 being very short cause i feel like that has been widely speculated and talked about already. then 2021 and 2022. this post will discuss the event and stuff that happened + some commentary + cpn clownery. enjoy!!!!!
I. CPFs team building and showing strength
It would not be fair to exclude this feat that cpfs achieved with the free tickets for Weibo night. Even if we had no idea if both of them will attend, cpfs tried to grab tickets just in case it happens so we will be prepared. In the first round, we surprised all other fan groups with how we dominated and it set the rhythm for the next rounds. Trust cpfs to set the trend and make other fandoms “wake up”. lol. They can say what they want about cpfs but we all know that part of the hate is because they do not understand why we’re still here. They don’t get why we are this strong and a happy group.
My favorite thing that happened was when the top profile photos spelled out BJYXSZD + heart with a mole. It doesn’t stop there tho, the next week/round, we still dominated so Sina Weibo tried to save face by doing some tactics to suppress us. Nevertheless, every week, more of us got tickets because of the help of our little turtle fandom.
There were also efforts to get top comments on Weibo Night posts but I won’t get into that anymore cause we usually do that. But the thought of showing strength “online” as what the boys advertised is sweet.
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Years later, we are still as strong as ever and shall remain that way. and that’s all thanks to each and every turtle out there who chooses positivity & makes sure our community remains a safe space.
II. The anticipation and announcements
It’s safe to say that this year, XZ is a sure attendee cause he always tops the voting at this event. However, some were still not sure cause he did not attend other public events last year like 10c starlight or NYE events cause he is busy with filming his projects. On 1/10 evening tho, a rather unsavory rumor made it on HS which was a signal that weibo night was getting desperate and wanted some noise for their event. lol. maybe there are other parties involved, but the intent is the same. I will also just mention the issue that happened on 1/9 with Chunzhen and them withdrawing lottery tickets supposedly won by certain fans. But the next day, Weibo lottery decided to honor the win and gave the tickets. I have no reaction to this tbh, and that’s why i didn’t talk about this separately and at length on my blog. It’s the brand / fandom that i have nothing to do with’s issue. As a turtle, we all know how CZ is with certain things so i’m not surprised that this happened. LOL.
I honestly feel for XZ, he is out there working hard and minding his own business but people and circumstances keep dragging him into irrelevant incidents.
As for WYB, everyone thought he wasn’t gonna attend. This is the same energy as last year. People are busier with grabbing tickets for his SDC6 finals and completely ignored weibo night ( as they should ). There was still some hope tho, cause if you think about it, he attended a lot of platform events. Tencent, IQIYI, GQ MOTY and 2 NYE shows. So why not Weibo Night? I have said it before, but one thing that I loved about WYB attending multiple events by the end of last year was it’s a show of his position and professionalism in the industry. He can go anywhere and be welcomed — he has good relations with almost everyone and that is important in their industry.
I know he is not fond of public events, but i’d like to think he says yes because of his professional relationship with these platforms/companies. I was never a fan of when people flex that their fave “will not go to xx because they did something to him etc.” LOL. That’s not how any industry works. You can’t burn bridges and I’m happy that WYB doesn’t do that. It’s also a testament of how much of a good boy he is 🤍
Anyway, back to the timeline. On 1/10, Weibo announced some winners and the boys are on there. I guess One & Only winning was a clue that WYB will go. Then a so/o account gave a tip that WYB will announce his attendance to an event on 1/11 @ 13:00. So by the evening of 1/10, it was mostly confirmed that WYB will be going.
The next day, 1/11, Weibo Night account started posting emoji clues for the remaining celebrities to be added in their guest lineup. A few hours later, both the boys announced their attendance. What’s different this time tho is aside from the usual copy-paste caption, there is a reminder for everyone to not do any fan activities at the venue. more details was also added in the comment. I guess they don’t want a repeat of what happened last year with the crowds. It caused a delay & cancellation of the red carpet. Both XZS and YBO reposted with more guidelines to follow like no gatherings and light signs etc.
i know weibo dictated the posting time but the 13 kadian is sending me! yizhan! 🫶🏼
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The BJYX ST mods also sent out a message to not do any offline support.
There are more fandom drama after the announcement with other groups but i won’t add that here anymore cause it will only rot our brain. && it’s so much better to focus on the boys!
III. Pre show discussion
On the eve of Weibo Night, GG attended an awards show and it gave us some sweet candy. The most interesting to me is the choice of Alexander McQueen and the first two celebrities tagged by the brand on their weibo in 2024. This is giving me Dsquared vibes. Also how it almost mirrors the wedding-ish vibes they had last Weibo night. I know we as cpfs are somehow programmed to seeing connections but honestly, they don’t make it hard.
Late at night too, Weibo started showing opening screens of attendees and of course they didn’t put them in the same group/frame. This is understandable cause they wouldn’t put the top male celebrities together and knowing how both their fandoms hate each other. Also, how the grouping went, WYB’s was more of the “movie group”. That won’t stop me from being a bit better tho. lol. Cause if they can’t put them in the same frame like that, there is just no way they will be on the same stage or even sat remotely close to each other.
A photo from inside the venue also showed the projected commercial on stage is WYB & Chunzhen 😂😂😂😂😂
I can just imagine XZ smiling when he sees.
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There were also talks of the both of them being on the second row. XZ was already seated way before the ceremony started, and their names are so close but cpfs were anticipating since WYB was not inside yet. We were all waiting to see if it will happen. WYB is supposedly next to YZ but then we see that Jackson sat there. We joked that he should stay there so WYB’s place will be taken and he will have no choice but to sit next to XZ 😂😂😂
IV. Red Carpet shenanigans
🟢 WYB’s red carpet walk
I honestly didn’t get the whole look tho when some people pointed out that it’s the glam version of what he wears when he plays golf — i kinda got it. For his past platform events like GQ, IQIYI & 10C, his red carpet were really casual. I guess that’s what he wants — to be comfortable walking the carpet. There were also some praising him for going against the norm. Well, I have to say tho that his face really stood out. Minimal to no make up look. He was so handsome! 🫶🏼
🔴 XZ’s red carpet walk
I love his outfit! It’s black but still got that something special to make him stand out. &&& I honestly love the hair! I thought I would cry because of how short it is now but it suits him. I mean, he looks gorgeous in anything but you know what I mean ☺️
CPN: XZ signed his name beside/very close to WYB. granted, there are so many signatures there but i’m wondering if he recognized his husband’s signature. lol. In this simple way, they can be next to each other!
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V. Weibo night links
XIAO ZHAN
Photoshoot for red carpet look
Photoshoot for second outfit
Xiao Zhan winning Outstanding Actor of the Year
WANG YIBO
Photoshoot for red carpet look // Photoshoot BTS video
Yibo winning popular filmmaker of the year
Yibo-Official post for Weibo Night
* This is incomplete cause we still don’t have ( at the moment of posting ), the BTS for XZS photoshoot + their photos while receiving the awards.
VI. THE SUGAR RUSH 🍭🍬
• WYB’s personal post of him and the caption. The freakin caption. Look, i know that WYB’s brand is all about being the “cool guy” so maybe that’s why he said in the caption that he likes the HS about him. But the thing is, it’s totally out of character. How many events did he attend with him going so high up the HS with much more interesting tags but he chose this? Also, he really needed to do so that he used his own account??? For a couple of years now, yibo-official is the one that posts for him when he is at an event. So the speculation is this one is personal and amused him so much, seeing that their HS for the same event they are both at matched! Also, when WYB posted that, CPFs flooded the top comments! Understandably so. 💛
• The signed photos which i’m not sure about. I actually saw someone post that earlier and people were clowning about how it can’t be real.
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But then, an account posted a giveaway with all the other attendees and it included the couple photo. I’m putting this down as clownery, cause on their end there will always be deniability. The autographed photo was also deleted by the account a bit later, which is actually expected cause it will bring trouble. lol.
• XZS and YBO matching again! Look at how they arranged the photos. How a few of the snaps are not in theme with the rest. Nothing new here!
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• The same song and dance of them missing to see each other. As soon as XZ was gone, WYB came in to sit down. Good thing he had Jackson to talk too a bit and he was gone again after 10 mins! Hopefully they could spend time together backstage away from the cameras. 📷
People are pointing out that XZ was checking his phone lol. probably checking if WYB is giving him a signal to leave so they can do their usual operation. These two! Honestly!
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• Not really CPN, but a similarity. In the red carpet, both of them didn’t do the “activities” that others were supposed to. If you watched the red carpet, there is a point where they have to choose something from a wall with numbers. there is also a choice to take a photo from one of the “themes” by they both bypassed it. I was rolling my eyes cause a WYB anti was trying to make a big deal out of it, but then XZ did the exact same thing. Some people just don’t understand how celebrities like them operate. Not to say that they are above everyone else, it’s just that they do things differently.
• ZSWW fake rumor account posted at 19:21. At this time the red carpet was already finished. It doesn’t say who is saying which line. I’m interpreting this incident to be something that happened today backstage 🤡🤡🤡
"A kiss, a kiss...
"Oh, okay, let's talk about it later when we get back.”
"There will be a surprise when I go back 😏”
"What?"
“You'll know when you go back”
Then they posted again, at 21:05 with a much longer one but it doesn’t seem be pertaining to today’s events.
• There is a photo/video of XZ talking to Huang Bo! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! and now we’re thinking about how they haven’t cooperated with each other but seem familiar. Yes, we don’t know all their relationship and friends off camera but my mind immediately went to the SDC 3 clowning. That’s most likely when they became close. lol.
• Heaven’s choice cause WYB was sat at #23 ( Love Zhan )
• This time, both of them left the venue after they received their awards. XZ didn’t stay like he did the previous years. Good for them! It’s better to spend time together 🤍 I know that most of us expected what happened today, them not being in the same place at the same time. Tho some may see that in a negative way, I actually see this as an example of trying to keep their private life separate from the public. Tho a big part of their lives are on camera and that’s how they met. I think what they are doing is really to reserve the time they have & are seen together in private. Maybe some can’t see it that way and will be frustrated but at the end of the day, we have to respect their choice.
• XZ’s 2nd outfit is by Balmain! He tends to wear this at events that they both attend 🥹🥹🥹
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• It’s now XZ’s turn to see the cpf headband light signs! Lol. I hope he saw it. We all know that he is near sighted sooooo….
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====
If there are post event CPNs, i will do a separate discussion. See you in the next Weibo Night! ✌🏼
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vasito-de-leche · 2 months
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;R1999 6 - Relationship Headcanons
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Compilation of headcanons about 6 in a romantic relationship.
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I was struggling soooooo hard with another 6 request so I had to get this post out of my system fist before tackling that one
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Okay, first of all! I don't see 6 as the type of person who would be that interested in having a relationship, at least not beyond what is expected of him as the leader of Apeiron. It's the least of his priorities as of now.
Part of it is largely due to his responsibilities--he knows that he cannot afford to show any sort of favoritism, and he is much too thoughtful to force someone he cares about under such pressure, simply because he harbors feelings for them. It's very ironic that the one thing that defines his entire life and existence is also what keeps him from seeking any deeper relationships. 6 knows more than anyone that the loneliness of his title would be extended to his partner, and so, he has no actual firsthand experience in romantic relationships other than what he might've studied while in reclusion.
Of course, this isn't to say that he's entirely inept when it comes to socializing or all sorts of relationships. He is the best at being 6 for a reason, as much as he dislikes it.
We know that he loves his people, if his devotion to his role of leader is anything to go by. And he clearly cares about his friendship with 210, 37 and Sophia, as strained or complex as these dynamics may be, as he makes sure to retrieve the crown that they made for him each and every day that it's stolen. He loved his aunt Alma too, she played a big role in his upbringing after all.
So 6 isn't a stranger to love, but he is very passive about it.
To describe 6 as "passive" could be seen as an insult, especially after what his character event showed us in relation to his struggle against fate, but I think there's a key difference to the passive nature that is presented between 6 prior to receiving the Revelation and after he settles in as the new leader. His initial lack of action was fueled by resignation, a fear for the inevitable fate his bloodline carries. But now, he knows that refusing to act is sometimes necessary to maintain the harmony within the island, this is why he's described as a mediator. Love can happen, but there's no reason to upset the precarious balance he maintains by indulging in romance.
On the subject of 6 developing a crush.
6 is an extremely introspective man with a very good grasp on his own feelings and thoughts--even more so now that he's obtained the Revelation! If he has a crush then trust me, he knows. He notices the fondness he has for you the moment those feelings start blooming in his chest.
And he's not going to do a single thing about it.
He's not going to act upon any of his feelings. He's not going to let anyone find out, for the sake of maintaining this perfect balance. His behaviour remains the same, no signs of being flustered whatsoever. There are no fleeting glances, no hands brushing on accident. He doesn't stare at you from afar, wondering if you could ever love him, pining and yearning for your attention.
That doesn't happen, not in public.
Just like every other detail about his life, his thoughts of you are kept private, for him to ponder on whenever he's alone in his room, meditating. The outside world has no business bearing witness to these feelings--you are special to him and so, he keeps the memory of you safe and sound. 6 is much too mature to actually pine and yearn, but he does like to wonder and explore other possibilities, another life in which he's not burdened by fate, in which he's given the choice to find his own soul number for as long as it takes. Another life in which he can openly confess without fearing for what might happen to you should you accept him.
I like to think that these little fantasies help him tolerate the stress of the daily routine, it's something nice that gives him solace. When he's alone, his existence isn't defined by a number nor the history of his family, he can just be at ease and dream of better things.
I want to stress the fact that he wouldn't confess, no matter how strong his feelings are. Even if you happened to reciprocate, 6 would always prioritize the stability of Apeiron and turn you down for your sake and everyone else's. 6 would actually prefer to be close friends with his crush.
On the subject of dating 6.
I like to think that for 6 to start considering the idea of courting you, you have to actually debate him.
Not a battle of attrition like the debates 210 insists on having, but a fair and honest discussion to give him proof and solid arguments that could help him ease into the idea of dating someone for love, rather than duty. Something like this would really ease 6's mind, being able to get to know you better through the way you defend yourself and the love you hold for him, as well as weighting the public's reaction. Two birds in one stone. If you manage to do that, then there's no reason for him to object.
I don't know what I like the most out of these options though, the idea of 6 choosing to give a proper confession in private to finally share everything he's kept to himself, so that you may accept all of him at his most honest and vulnerable. Or him not confessing, choosing to invite you to his study and enjoy a moment of respite in absolute silence, knowing that there's nothing keeping you two from being together. So whichever floats your boat!
When it comes to actually dating him, not much would change.
6 understands that there's been a considerable shift in his life, but his lack of experience and solitary lifestyle would lead him to continue with his routine--if you want to see him, then you'll have to seek him out like you've always done. He's more than content knowing you're aware of his feelings and wouldn't really seek to change anything else, so it's entirely up to you to communicate and discuss what you'd like out of this relationship. He'll be more than glad to listen and accomodate you as much as he can.
You taking the initiative in this might also fuel him to share the things he'd like to do! Again, this passive nature doesn't come from shyness, but duty. I can see him being open to anything and being very direct about his own needs, as long as he can continue to separate his personal life and time with you from his time outside and his responsibilities.
Overall, dating 6 is a very calm experience! He never got the chance to know himself without the pressure of the Revelation, but he enjoys getting to know you instead. While most of the time he simply asks you to sit with him and relax, he puts the effort into finding time to spend with you, even if it's just walking together from one place to another before both of you must tend to your respective duties.
On the subject of his partner not being from Apeiron.
The way I see it, 6 is a little more lenient with certain aspects--unlike 37, for example. I don't see her capable of being in a romantic relationship with an irrational number, and getting to trust someone from outside who isn't specifically aiming to adapt to the scriptures will take a long time, but 6 is a little more flexible under the proper circumstances.
I believe this is the case because of his Bond: Morning voice line!
...One should never parcel off the loaf, for it's a violation of the scripture. But we are not on the island. So, please enjoy the freedom.
So the moment this pressure of responsibility is lifted from his shoulders, I think he would be open to the possibility of his partner being literally anyone. Because of the Revelation, I don't think 6 is blinded by faith like other members of Apeiron are, if else he's burdened by the contradictions and paradoxes that are natural in the world.
Not sure how he would feel with a human partner though! Chapter 05 only says that humans and mankind as a whole are dismissed entirely as "imaginary numbers," forbidden on the island, and there's no specifics on how they feel about mixed arcanists.
Round of cute things.
Literally just a round of cute things that 6 would do or enjoy because I don't know how to incorporate them onto the post in a fancy way.
His crown was made to keep his hair out of his face, but we can see that it's not doing a very good job lol. I think 6 would really find it charming whenever his partner tucks his hair behind his ear so they can get a look at his face--he's much too used to hiding and keeping to himself, so wanting to be seen by you is a pretty new experience. It's also a very casual and innocent gesture, so whenever he feels like getting you to pay attention to him (more than often as a way to excuse himself out of some other conversation) he will allow his hair to drape over his face hoping you'll notice.
6 isn't big on public displays of affection. Just sitting next to you is more than enough for him--but if he happens to notice you get lonely or make cute eyes at him, he will scoot close until your shoulders bump into each other. If 6 is feeling particularly cuddly, he will hold your hand.
But behind closed doors, 6 is very partial to kissing the top of your head or your temple. It's a very gentle kiss, he doesn't even pucker up, just closes his eyes, gently rests his lips there and hums to himself. And he could stay there for a long time if you let him.
If 6 is feeling restless for whatever reason, I can see him asking you to read something for him, so he can concentrate on the sound of your voice and nothing else. It's very soothing to him. He prefers that you read something he can tune out, as opposed to telling him something he'd like to pay attention to--like your thoughts or how your day has been.
Oh! Also, I don't see him as the type to want matching accessories or material things like that, but if you were to give him a gift or something to match with you, he would specifically ask you to keep it simple--nothing gilded, nothing shiny, nothing that is easy for seagulls to steal. Something like a little string bracelet, if possible in your favorite colors rather than his--it might be just a small fragment in a world of matters, but it means so much to him.
Also also, 6 does notice a lot of your gestures or expressions, the little things about you that often go unnoticed. The way you might scrunch your nose, tilt your head, fiddle with your hands, tap your feet--anything.
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ace-of-gay · 10 months
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Tiny for today
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Loki x little! reader
Warnings: age regression, little names like baby, tiny. Caregiver name like daddy, (i think thats honestly the only one)
Items like stuffies and paci, bottle. Reader regresses to newborn headspace
No weight, skin color, or gender mentioned.
Age regression is a coping mechanism if you dont like it please dont read it or educate yourself on the topic but please be respectful
Any hate will be deleted
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Waking up doe eyed and deep in your headspace, loki knows immediately just from the glance you give him, turning the lights lower so not to hurt his sweet baby's eyes, he walks over, putting in full effort to keep a kind gentle demeanor, “good morning my dovey, were tiny today aren’t we?” He questions, knowing hes not going to get an answer.
“Yes, I believe we are, which means it’s a daddy and baby day hm?”
He would be lying if he said this want one of his favorite types of regressions you do, he doesn’t get to see his little one like this all that often, the sweet sparkly eyes are a given, those alone have him wrapped around your finger, hes at your beck and call or more so your babble and cry but right now the sweet gentle hold of your eyes to his approach, “yes, indeed, a divine rainy day for daddy and his little star” he coos at you, running his supple hand over your cheek, cherishing every ounce of adoration his heart could feel in the wake of your smile.
A small tiny babble of pure love and wanting to feel him hold you, he took this with immediate understanding, as you move your arms somewhat aimlessly he helps loosens you from the blanket so you don’t accidentally bend your arms or hands in a way that would strain or pull on them funny.
Lifting you into his arms, holding you chest to chest with him as he grabs a paci from the bedside table and your stuffy from the bed, he carries you to the living room a bounce in his step to soothe you and a hum in his chest, he knew you loved this he would make sure to have one of your hands above his chest so you could feel the vibrations of the sweet thrum of his voices resonation in his chest just for you.
Laying you gently on the couch he holds your stuffy above you to boop your nose with its nose, making kissy sounds as he taps the stuffys nose against your smiley cheeks and sweet delicate nose, he lays the stuffy atop your chest where your little hands could easily grasp it, he turns to move the coffee table to the side of the room, going into the closet, pulling out the padding mat your favorite blankie for when you’re tiny and a few other things, making a comfy little place on the floor for you, much safer than having you somewhere you could fall.
After transferring you to the little nest as he called it he gave you your paci turning on comforting calm music and going to the kitchen to make himself tea and you a warm bottle of milk, keeping his eyes on you as he does this.
When he returns to you he sets his tea aside wanting to make sure you got your bottle first since you couldn’t quite tell him when you needed food or drink he wanted to make sure you weren’t neglected in your needs, holding you gently in his arms making sure you were comfy in his arms before he goes to take your paci but you trill in soft baby giggles when you refuse to let him take it.
“Oh silly baby, someone’s being mischievous and its not me for once, can daddy take your paci? I have a bottle of warm yummy milk for my baby” to which you allow him to take the paci cause I mean what little one would pass up a yummy bottle in the morning.
Hes full of adoration, especially when you suckle on the bottle so intently with half lidded eyes, like it took all of you to just do the small things and that’s perfectly fine with him, its what hes here for, hes here to take care of his baby, hes honored that you trust him with you in such a vulnerable state.
After your bottle and all related in that he takes small comforting sips from his tea before pulling out one of his many books, it didn’t matter what he read aloud so long as it was appropriate, his favorite writings were old poems of sweet rotations of love how it be that planets circle the sun in a dance that with their gravity pulls causing the star to dance from a tiny wobble. One hand holding the book and his other running through your hair, today was about his little one, making sure to keep you happy and calm, he’d plant every tree on earth in light of the sun and down of the rain if it meant he could see your smile everyday the way he sees it right now.
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