#and no before anyone asks we weren’t high school sweet hearts

[whytheylosttheirminds]

I Remember Everything - Rafe Cameron

(Prologue and Chapter 1)

Summary: You left the island two years ago, leaving the love of your life a shattered man in your wake. Now, when you return, you find the sweet boy you once loved has transformed into a monster of a man. How can you detangle the real Rafe from the terrible things he's done?

Timeline: begins toward the end of obx season 3 and is mostly canon.

Content: this story contains sexual content, alcohol and drug abuse, and brief mentions of violence. All chapters are 18+, minors do not interact!

Prologue

Before gold, before grams, before the gun, there was you. Back when there weren’t crosses to steal, lines to snort, cops to run from, there was you. Long summer nights on the Druthers, your mom blowing up your phone ‘cause you missed curfew again. Skipping class and riding to the beach on the back of his bike. All the way back to grade school, playing tag and pretending you were pirates. Then middle school, that kiss under the lifeguard tower, a first for both of you. In high school, the night you got back from the “character-building summer camp” you had been shipped off to and you shared your other first. When you were first together, it didn’t even hurt, but just felt like fucking finally. 

He remembers it all, taking all of his strength to keep it stuffed under the surface. The coke, the violence, the drama he creates in his wake cover you up nicely, until those nights when he’s dead asleep and there you are again, leaving. When he wakes, it all comes back to him. How he sat on the curb and watched you go, bloody and hurt from the night that was your final straw. How he showed up on your doorstep the next day, like he was five-years-old again asking if you could come outside and play. How your mother told him you were gone and wouldn’t tell him where you went.

“Honey,” she said with something like pity in her voice, “Promise me, you’ll let her go, let her be happy.”

A promise he kept, until the day you rolled back into town with no warning. Your timing could not have been worse. After the summer from hell, the summer that made him a killer, he finally felt like he was in control. It wasn’t until he saw you, the only person in the world that ever really knew him, that he realized he had no idea who he was. 

Chapter One

You clutched your phone tight, reading and rereading the message. One you used to get nearly every night but hadn’t seen in two long years.

party at cameron’s tonite !!

It was a group text, sent by the girl from your high school you bumped into in the grocery store earlier that day. You had been back on the island for all of an hour before inevitably seeing someone you knew. You tried to duck quickly into the cereal aisle, but she caught your eye before you could disappear, an action you were infamous for.

“Omg, we need to hang out soon!” She had said, before handing you her phone to put your new number in.

You smiled your fakest smile and said, “it’s a must!” You didn’t think either of you really meant it, but apparently she had.

There were eleven or twelve other numbers in the group text, none you had saved, but you assumed they were likely other people from your high school. She probably just added anyone in her contacts she could think of, not even stopping to realize she was inviting the Kook prince’s former princess to his party. Your relationship had been the stuff of legend on this island. Everyone had an opinion, you were practically a celebrity couple, and it was the biggest news on the island for months when you left, suddenly disappearing overnight. Some real shit must’ve gone down around here since then to make it such old news that this girl didn’t even think about it when adding you to this text.

Your heart pounding in your ears, you couldn’t believe it when you felt yourself typing out i’ll be there :) 

You wore your hair down, the way you always used to have it in high school. After you left, you had cut it short, wanting to shed away as much of your old life as you could, but in the last few months you’d started to let it grow back. Now it flowed down to the middle of your back, tickling the skin of your shoulders where the thin spaghetti straps of the little dress you had on left them exposed. You let the front pieces fall around your face, a sort of curtain to keep an extra layer between you and the other partygoers.

You could not believe you were here. For real this time, not in a dream as you had been every night for two years, but really here. 

As you walked down the gravel path, it all came rushing back. The smell of Rose’s garden, the distant sound of the ocean lapping against the shore, the low thud of the music echoing through the crisp evening air. How many times have you walked down this path? How many nights had you spent here, your senses filled with the glory of Tannyhill, the glory of him? And yet now it felt so heavy, the sights, sounds, smells of it all were nearly choking you. Tears welled in your eyes, but something kept your feet walking towards those grand front doors, towards him.

Four years earlier…

The glass panes of the front door are slightly blurred, only revealing the soft lighting of the grand entryway on the other side. You had crossed this threshold at least a thousand times in the ten years since your family moved to this island. Knocking felt strange, you felt so small standing here in the porch light, surrounded by moths and the thick coastal August air. An envelope, wrinkled from being opened and rifled through so many times, was clutched between your clammy hands.

A figure you couldn’t quite make out approached the door, and your heart pounded in your ears as you hoped desperately it would be him who opened the door. But it wasn’t.

“Oh, hey - I- hi, Mr. Cameron,” you stammered, ever intimidated by the island’s most powerful man.

“Y/N,” Ward nodded cordially. “It’s after 10pm.”

You smiled weakly, if you felt small before, you feel positively infantile now.

“I was just hoping I could see Rafe for like, just a second,” you pleaded, putting on your sweetest smile.

“He’s studying,” Ward said. “You can come back tomorrow. Goodnight.”

Before you could protest, the door was closed and the blurred figure retreated into the house.

Never one to give up, you stuffed the letter into the back pocket of your jeans, and stepped back from the porch, sizing up the massive house to see which rooms still had lights on. You knew the blueprint of this place by heart, checking off each family member mentally as you scanned their window for signs of life. Wheezie’s room? Dark. Sarah’s room? Dark. Rose and Ward’s room? Still lit. This would have to be a stealth mission. 

You snuck around the side of the house and looked up at the last window on your list. To your excitement, the room was still lit. You saw a long shadow pass by the curtains, and you actually jumped a little from the thrill. After spending the longest summer of your life apart from the one person you wanted to spend it with, he was actually right there, just two stories off the ground.

You traveled 800 miles today, what was a few more feet? Blocking out the better judgment ringing in the back of your mind, you picked up a few pebbles from the rocky path that leads to the backyard, and started climbing the big tree that grew right up past Rafe’s balcony. How you were gonna get from the tree to the balcony? That was five-minutes-from-now-you’s problem. You chuckled to yourself as your body naturally found each branch and knot on the tree. You used to have competitions when you were kids to see who could climb this tree the fastest, and you beat Rafe everytime. You remembered the shocked look on his face the first time he saw you scurry up the tree, you were hoping for a similar level of approving surprise once you got where you were going.

Once you reached the branch directly across from Rafe’s balcony, you pulled one of the pebbles from your pocket and chucked it at his window as hard as you could. 

“Shit,” you whisper-yelled as the throw fell short and the pebble dropped, loudly knocking into the first floor window below. You couldn’t afford another noise-causing miss, so you recalculated the throw and bit your lip as you lobbed the next pebble hard. It smacked into Rafe’s window with a loud TINK and you smiled in satisfaction. You waited a moment, then two, and still nothing. The shadowy figure did not return to the curtain. You only had one pebble left, and you had never been good at climbing back down this tree. Remembering the time you fell out of it onto the waiting Rafe below, and you both ended up needing stitches, your stomach twisted in fear. You took in a deep breath and held it, letting the last pebble fly. Another sharp TINK, and a moment of baited breath later, the tall shadow finally returned to the window.

Rafe opened the curtains harshly and you immediately broke into a wild smile. He looked so cute in his fitted gray t-shirt and plaid pajama pants, his normally gelled back her falling in messy pieces around his face. You held back a giggle, delighted by the completely confused look on his face as he searched out the window for the cause of the sound. He lifted the window open and examined the two pebbles that had fallen on the windowsill. 

You took the opportunity to whisper a loud “psssst.” His face shot up in surprise and his eyes finally found you in the tree, just a few feet off of the balcony. Where you expected to see surprised delight on his face, you instead caught something cold and irritated.

“Y/N,” he whisper-called to you. “What are you doing?”

“I just got back, I wanted to see you!” You called to him, hoping his apparent anger was just in response to his own shock.

“I’m busy.” Rafe went to close the window and you felt your moment of opportunity slip away.

“Wait!” you stopped him. “Please don’t make me climb down. We both know it won’t end well.” You smiled a sweetly shy smile you hoped would melt his icy demeanor a bit.  

He sighed and looked at you annoyed for a moment before climbing out the window, his height requiring him to duck low in order to make it through. He had grown even taller over the summer, he must have hit 6 foot by now, maybe more. Your stomach flipped as you watched his athletic frame emerge from his bedroom, now able to see how defined his arms looked in the moonlight. You’d always thought he was a cute boy, but the way he looked right now lit a fire in your belly. Then you realized what it was - while you were gone, the cute boy-next-door had become a man.

“Just reach over,” he directed you.

“I don’t think I can without falling,” you explained. “I think I’m gonna have to jump.”

“Are you stupid?” He scoffed humorlessly.

Your heart sank, the boy you left behind three months ago never would have called you stupid.

“It’ll be fine, you just have to catch me,” you explained.

He rolled his eyes and opened his arms, reaching them over the bannister of the balcony, “fine.”

The brief moment of joy you got from his submission faded fast as you made the mistake of looking down at the gap between the tree and the balcony.

“Actually…” you said, bravery fading.

“What, are you scared?” Rafe taunted.

“No!” you insisted. You smiled at him, suddenly feeling like the two of you were ten again and he was daring you to jump off the trampoline into the pool in your backyard.

Now or never. With a deep breath and a sharp yelp, you threw yourself out of the tree and towards his waiting arms on the balcony. As promised, he caught you, and pulled you quickly over the bannister. His arms wrapped around your waist, yours around his shoulders, he held you there just a few inches off the ground.

You flattened your hands against the taut muscles of his shoulders, delighting in the strong warmth of them. But before you could fully revel in the feeling of being in his arms, he released his grip on your waist and you dropped the final few inches to the ground. Rafe quickly stepped back, breaking the lock your arms had around his neck. Despite the southern summer heat, the air between you suddenly felt ice cold.

“Rafe,” you whispered, stepping towards him, but he only pulled further away.

“You shouldn’t be here,” he said without even looking at you.

Rafe started back towards his window, and something gave you the feeling he was not going to invite you to follow him through it.

“I need to talk to you,” you started to explain.

Rafe whipped around to face you, the way he towered over you at his new height sending goosebumps down your spine.

“Why don’t you go talk to your new boyfriend instead?” He snapped.

You were so stunned that you let out a little laugh, which only made his furrowed brow scrunch even more in anger.

“What are you talking about?” You asked.

“I saw the pictures your camp was posting on their website all summer. I saw you wrapped around that douchebag.”

It took a moment of confused silence for you to realize what he was talking about, when it finally dawned on you, you laughed again. He turned from you and started heading towards the window again, but you caught his arm, your hand not able to fit even halfway around it.

“No, Rafe,” you explained, “That was just Andy, one of the other campers. We were doing a trust fall exercise. He dropped me like two seconds after that!”

Despite himself, Rafe turned to look at you, eyes examining you nervously. 

“Are you ok?” He asked in a small voice, wishing desperately that he didn’t care.

You smiled softly, there he was - your boy. 

“I’m fine,” you assured him, showing him the small scar on your wrist. “Just a little scrape.”

A moment passed, he avoided your eyes but allowed you to step closer, your hand sliding down his arm and slipping into his, his fingers reluctantly intertwining with yours. You knew exactly what words he was struggling to find, but decided to let him get there on his own.

Finally, “Why didn’t you answer my letters?”

Your other hand reached into your back pocket and pulled out the envelope you had tucked away. You held it out to him wordlessly. He took the letter and held it to the light coming from his room, examining it with a confused look. The envelope was addressed to him at Tannyhill, from you at camp. When he finally noticed the “return to sender” label, it all clicked.

“They kept getting returned to me, I don’t know why,” you said as you squeezed his hand. “I asked to use my phone to let you know but they wouldn’t let me. I almost just snuck out of camp and came home so I could explain it to you.”

“Your mom would’ve been so mad,” he said, finally, finally smiling at you.

“Then she would’ve just taken away my phone and we’d be back where we started,” You said. “There’s like twenty more letters like that. I don’t know why they never made it to you, it’s like someone was sabotaging me.”

Rafe seemed satisfied with your explanation and the remaining bit of anger on his face melted away completely. He stuffed the letter in his pocket and suddenly threw his arms around you, lifting you in the air as you yelped in surprise, giggling as he started planting sloppy kisses all over your face and neck.

“Shhh, baby, my parents will hear you,” he whispered. “They’ve got me locked in my tower because I failed my last quiz in this fucking summer school pre-calc class.”

“Rafe!” you said in mock-scandal. “Naughty language!”

“Oh, baby, I can say way naughtier things than that,” he growled in your ear, your cheeks now burning from real-scandal.

“C’mon,” he said, setting you down and grabbing your hand, to lead you to his still-open window. 

He placed his large hand on the small of your back as he helped you through the window, climbing in after you and closing it slowly so as to not make a sound.

You and Rafe had done some more-than-kissing things before, but that was the night you gave yourselves to each other completely. He held you after, softly kissing the scar on your arm from when Andy had dropped you.

“Never gonna let that Andy asshole touch you again,” he said between kisses. “He can find his own girl, you’re mine.”

You giggled and he looked up at you in confusion.

“Rafe,” you were laughing hard now. “Andy’s gay.”

He broke into a bashful grin, a quick blush of embarrassment swept across his cheeks before he grew serious again and started kissing up your arm.

“I don’t care,” he said. “They should all know - all the Andys and Jakes and Chads and whoeverthefucks,” his kisses had reached your neck, “no guy is ever gonna get to touch you like me.” He pulled back and looked into your eyes with a sincerity that squeezed your heart. “Gonna love you forever. Gonna marry you, make you a mom. Never gonna spend three months, or even three fucking days away from you again. That what you want?”

“Yes,” you breathed, meaning it with your whole being.

“Good.”

Now…

The memories flooded your brain as you opened the door and stepped into the home you used to think would be yours someday. The party was swelling, the vibe feeling so familiar and so uncomfortable at the same time.

You made your way straight to the kitchen, desperately needing a drink. Every step you took sent a memory flashing through your thoughts like a shock to your brain. You passed the living room and saw movie-nights-turned-make-out-sessions on the couch, playing mario kart with Sarah and Wheezie while Rafe laughed at your hyper-competitiveness, prom pictures in front of the fireplace. You passed the dining room and saw the first family dinner you were invited to, how you made Ward laugh with a story about fishing your own dad used to tell, how Rafe squeezed your thigh under the table in pride. You entered the kitchen and saw the time you and Rafe set off the smoke alarm trying to make pancakes, the time he lifted you onto the counter and went down on you when his family was out of town. And then, standing by the keg, you saw the girl who invited you, clearly plastered already.

“Omg!” She yelled when she saw you.

Everyone else in the large kitchen turned and looked at you. It felt dramatic, but you could swear the whole room fell silent when they saw you, a comical record scratch playing in your head.

The girl who invited you ran over to you, beer sloshing over the side of her solo cup and onto her shirt. 

“I can not believe you came,” she said, loud enough for everyone to hear. “I completely forgot when I invited you, about, you know, you and-”

“Can I get one of those?” you cut her off quickly, gesturing towards her drink.

Before she could answer, a loud crash came from outside the kitchen’s open french doors. The heads that had all been watching you suddenly snapped toward the sound towards the crowded back yard. When the loud bellow of a man’s voice rang out, the people in the kitchen all ran towards the unfolding scene. You pushed through the crowd and out the doors, drawn inexplicably to the voice. Your heart dropped to your stomach when you realized why - it was Rafe.

There in the backyard, packed with drunk people and lit by string lights, Rafe stood with his fist clenched in the collar of some guy’s white button up, forcefully pulling the scared looking dude toward him while he yelled.

“I said none of that fucking cheap shit,” Rafe yelled at the guy you now realized was a cater-waiter. 

“I’m sorry sir, I-” Rafe threw the man down and he fell back in the dirt.

“This isn’t some ghetto block party out in The Cut,” Rafe yelled. “Do you know who’s fucking house you’re at right now?”

The crowd around you watched, most smiling in support of the man they looked at like he was a rockstar. You cringed at the looks of admiration in their eyes and took Rafe in with your own.

He looked different, harder. His floppy blond locks had been shaved off, and he had traded old t-shirts and jeans for slacks and a polo. He was as tall and built as you remembered, but instead of it being endearing, it was just scary as he looked down at the poor server like he was gonna kill him.

Then he spat on him. He actually spat on another human being. It disgusted you in more ways than one, and you felt your heart breaking in your chest as you realized you had no idea who this man was. The boy who held you on that night four years ago and promised to be yours forever clearly didn’t live here anymore. You turned quickly and pushed back through the crowd, unable to watch another second of this sickening display of toxic masculinity.

Rafe glared down at the pogue-scum in the dirt below him, an eerily familiar feeling washed over him as something moved quickly in the corner of his eye. He turned at just the right moment to see a whip of long hair disappear through the crowd.  But it wasn’t. It couldn’t possibly be. Surely, it was not you.

(chapter 2)

a/n: Hiiii this is the first fic I've posted in about 10 years!! Hope you enjoyed, forgive me if I'm rusty! More chapters to come :)

[ladykailitha]

Paper Hearts Part 5

I have no restraint. I have NO restraint. I HAVE NO RESTRAINT!!! So guess who starting writing a SEQUEL to this because she was feeling too sad to write Sweet Home Indiana? Yup! I would apologize, but this story is too cute for words.

We have a mild panic attack about the ending of the chapter from Steve, Eddie's plan, and Steve accepting an offer that made mostly in jest, but also in deep earnest.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4

TAG LIST IS CLOSED!!!

But if the people on my list that haven't interacted on my stuff lately don't reply by Sunday slots may open up. So don't despair just yet if you want to be on the list and can't.

****

Steve banged his head on his locker in frustration. Why did he do that? Why did he tell Eddie he was interested in boys, too? Why did he trust the other boy to have his back? Especially when no one else seemed to.

He sighed.

He wrenched open his locker and a little pink heart fluttered to the floor. He frowned as he picked it up.

They weren’t going to hand out the hearts until Valentine’s Day so what was this then?

-Stevie

I like the way you’re kind even when it doesn’t benefit you.

Kas

Steve blinked down at the little heart in confusion. It wasn’t the exactly the same color as the hearts they were going to give out for the holiday. But it was close. He rubbed his thumb over the sender’s name.

Kas.

He knew it wasn’t a real name, having recently poured over the yearbook. So it had to be a reference to something, but what he didn’t know. He stuck it in his jacket pocket and grabbed what he needed for his next class, vowing to worry about it later.

As he sat in his chemistry class waiting for it to start he pulled it out of his pocket to look at it again. The pen was red ink and bold. Steve found himself smiling at the strange little pink heart.

Suddenly it was ripped out of his hand.

His head snapped up to see Tommy H. standing there with it in his hand. “Someone is sending Harrington Valentine’s hearts?”

“Give it back, Tommy,” Steve growled. “It’s none of your business. Not anymore.”

Tommy looked him in the eye before tossing it to the ground and walking off. “Whatever.”

Steve bent over to pick it up.

“Some girl named Kassy or whatever,” Tommy was telling Nicole. “Could be anyone from the younger grades.”

“I suppose so,” she said, tossing her red hair over her shoulder. “But anyone with sense would know he’s the plague now.”

Tina rolled her eyes. “Just because he refuses to suck either of you two off doesn’t mean he’s still not the hottest guy in school.”

Tommy rounded on her and called her a bitch.

She just scoffed and swung back around just as the teacher walked into the room. The tardy bell rang and he called the class to order, effectively squashing all gossip.

Steve ducked his head to hide his smile. He might feel a bit bitter that it was her party that Nancy threw their relationship in his face at, but it wasn’t her fault his girlfriend had gotten so pissed drunk that she lost her ironclad control. And right now he was feeling especially grateful to her for that comment.

He managed to get through his class just from riding that high alone.

His last class was algebra and it really should have been made illegal by now. The way the numbers and letters seemed to float off of the page as he struggled to parse their meaning. He just had to pass one quarter of this shit and he could graduate.

So he put his head down to learn and just suffer through it.

After school, he got to his locker and knelt down to open it.

Again a pink heart fluttered out of it. But this time it had a couple of friends. Steve stuck them in his jacket pocket again and exchanged books. He grabbed his English and history homework so that he could get them done for tomorrow.

He opened the back door of his car and threw in his backpack. He went to open his door when Eddie was suddenly at his side.

He leaned up against the door, preventing Steve from opening it.

“So the king swings for both teams?” he asked, crossing his arms over his chest.

Steve looked around, but they were alone for the most part, so he just shrugged. “Some guys are hot and for some reason I can’t fathom, I trust you not have it all over the school by lunch tomorrow.”

Eddie chuckled and crossed his legs at the ankles. “I wouldn’t do that to ya.”

“Yeah and why would that be?” Steve asked turning around and sticking his hands in his front pockets.

“That would be because it would be hypocritical of me to go spreading around the school someone likes guys,” he said, bumping their shoulders together.

Steve looked at him for a long time before he nodded. “You know by now I don’t put much stock into rumors. I did that once and got my shit rocked for it. Lesson learned, man.”

“I heard about the infamous Byers left hook,” Eddie agreed. “That was some pretty major shit rocking.”

The jock rolled his eyes. “I’m pretty sure he was my first concussion.”

The older boy looked up at the sky as he thought about it and then nodded. “Billy Hargrove would be round two, I’m assuming?”

Steve nodded and then threw his head back. “This year has gone from bad to worse and I’m barely keeping my head above water.”

Eddie hummed his agreement. It really has seemed like Steve couldn’t catch a break. “I feel that. I’m really struggling this year. Last year I didn’t graduate because I so focused on getting out of here, making it with my music that I forgot the promise I made to my mom that I would. Graduate I mean. But this year is just hell.”

“That sucks, Eds,” he agreed.

“You think you’re going to graduate?”

“God, I hope so,” Steve murmured, collapsing against the side of his car. “I just want to get out of this town.”

Eddie chuckled and shook his head. “Where would you even go, man?”

“I’d pick a direction and just drive for as long as I could,” he admitted softly. “I just need to be as far away from this place as I can.”

The metalhead nodded. “If we both graduate we should hop into my van and just run for the coast.”

Steve smiled fondly. “I think I’d like that.”

Eddie pushed himself off the car and then waved Steve goodbye.

The younger boy got into his car with a sigh of relief. Not only did Eddie promise not to out him, he came out to Steve, too. Now it was mutually assured destruction.

Steve smiled and started the car for home. Maybe this year was starting to get a little better.

****

Eddie shoved his hands in his back pockets as he made his way to his van. He didn’t know what possessed him to ask Steve to runaway with him or what possessed Steve to agree but it left a warm fuzzy feeling in his chest.

He hauled himself into the van and sat there for a moment just thinking about it. Of course that meant graduating himself, so he would have to focus on that. His van roared to life and he drove off.

It took him a couple of tries but he finally found the construction paper he needed. He had even found some black construction paper that he was going to use to make little paper bats to tape on the inside of his locker to make it less miserable.

Especially as he was told he couldn’t have his metal band posters up in there. They were too “evil” and “Satanic” and he should be more “Christ like” as if they were epitome of Christian virtue with all the hate they had for anyone not like them.

But Eddie got down to work and started making as many pink hearts as he could. He had thought briefly about adding a couple of red hearts in the mix, but he thought that was a step too far. He didn’t want to get Steve’s hopes up that he had multiple crushes on him if that wasn’t true.

He still planned on giving Steve his one red heart that he had bought. That wasn’t in question. He had already filled it out and returned it to the great big baskets that had been in the main hall.

It simply read:

Stevie,

You make being in this town worth living in,

Love,

Kas

He let out a slow shuddering breath. That was one of the scariest things he had to do since choosing to live with an uncle he had only met twice his entire life over being in the system. He knew his life was infinitely greater being with Uncle Wayne and he hoped this would yield a similar result.

Because he had made a promise and with all signs pointing toward Steve at least being receptive to a date, he had to shoot his shot and hope for the best.

He had made roughly fifty or so of the pink hearts and set about dividing them into four piles. With Jeff, Gareth, and Brian offering to help with the friendship hearts he wanted to make sure everyone got a few of them. Plus it made it easier to come up with things. Because even if they came up with similar ideas, they at least would be phrased slightly different so Steve wouldn’t figure it out.

He also had the idea of using pseudonyms so that it wasn’t all anonymous and initials, though there would some of those too.

But it was time for band practice, so he gathered up his things and the hearts and trotted off to his van, a wave and goodbye to Wayne on his way out.

****

Steve finally opened the other three hearts. Two were anonymous but the third surprisingly was from Tina.

It read it in the tiniest print that was still legible:

Steve,

I know we’re supposed to turn these in or whatever,

But I just wanted to say you’re still A-OK in my book.

-Tina

He blushed. That was nice of her and after she stuck up for him in chemistry, he was feeling a little better about himself.

The other two were just as sweet if a tad unusual in their delivery. The first one said:

Steve,

I’m sorry you lost your crown,

you kept the bullies from being their worst selves.

And the other read:

Steve,

You are a good dude.

Sorry people are shit right now.

Steve shook his head. They were well-tended, he had no doubt but they were odd. Like they were trying to find something nice to say and didn’t know how to word it.

Which, fair.

He knew he had a hard time coming up with complements for the twenty girls he’d picked out for his little project. He had to make sure the message wasn’t creepy or would come across as stalker-y.

He smiled down at the messages. He pulled out a little notebook that he had used to collect all the little things that the kids had given him over the past couple years and put the hearts on their own little page. He carefully put the book back, hidden between two textbooks from his freshman year.

“Steven!” his mom called. “We’re home!”

“Coming, Mom!” he cried, hurrying down the stairs.

****

Part 6 Part 7 Part 8

Tag List: Closed

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[taesanluv3r]

pas de deux

hip-hop dancer! kim woonhak x ballet dancer! reader (ft. myung jaehyun & lee hyein as their best friends!)

rivals to lovers, a moderate amount of cuss words, lowercase intended, excuse any grammar / spelling mistakes </3

wc: 7,942

⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖

“woah look at that, first place gets a cool trophy and everything!”

kim woonhak tells his best-friend jaehyun, eyes gleaming as he looks at the new poster that had just been put up on the school’s bulletin board. “guess that means i’ll be going home with a cool trophy then!” the all too familiar snarky voice is followed by the sound of feet strutting towards him. the boy turns around and is met, much to his dismay, with his sworn rival and arch nemesis, yn ln and her own best-friend, lee hyein. see, the young pair had been enemies since the elementary school talent show. he just couldn't believe that his powerful and energetic hip-hop routine tied with some flimsy ballet. and similarly, she just couldn't get past the idea of her graceful performance having the same score as his repetitive moves. and so, stubborn and arrogant as ever, the competition between the two continued on through middle school and up to this very moment right now, in the heart of their shared high school campus, right in front of the bulletin board. 

“you wish!” the boy's friend says sternly, inflicting an eye roll from the rival girl. “no wait, he’s right…” hyein begins, her own eyes wandering off to inspect the poorly printed poster. “it’s a duet competition this time” she finishes, a finger pointed at the bold writing that very clearly said: 

star academy’s annual DUET competition. pas de deux, or don’t!

“so?” yn scoffs, “i’ll just have to find a partner to beat you with” her words are sharp, her eyes shooting metaphorical lasers through his own narrow ones. the boy just laughs, adjusting the strap of his bag against his shoulder, “if anyone even wants to partner with such a prissy princess like you” his words make her smile, “aw…” she drags out, clutching onto her satin pointe shoes as she takes one more step closer to him, “you think i’m a princess?” the girl’s eyes are big, batting her eyelashes mockingly at the now fuming boy. the silence had become too loud, the hateful pair cussing each other out with just the fiery looks on their faces. “alrighty then!” hyein says, breaking the tension and pulling her friend out of the petty staring contest. “you’ve got a partner to find so let’s get going!” she continues, tilting her head to the side as she drags the girl away. “good luck finding someone to willingly dance with you!” yn yells one last time, catching a final glimpse of the boy’s middle finger up in the air before he was out of her line of sight. 

౨ৎ

“i just don’t get it!” yn groans, head falling against the lunch table as she does so. “why won’t anyone partner up with me?” she turns to her friend who’s busy munching on the mystery meat-loaf that tasted a little too good that day. “maybe it’s because you’re an extremely pretentious prick?” hyein says while simultaneously chewing on her food. “ugh, this stinks!” her voice is hoarse from all the complaining she had been doing, “if you weren’t recovering from some stupid food poisoning, we could’ve done it together!” the ballet dancer whines, playfully hitting her best-friend on the shoulder and receiving a nasty look in return. “not my fault! i didn’t even know the cake was expired!” the girl sighs, deciding not to take all her frustrations out on her friend. “whatever, i’m gonna go blow off some steam” yn gets up, grabbing her pink duffle bag and water bottle. “don’t drive yourself insane, yn. i’m sure your knight in shining armor will come to you soon” hyein assures, still stuffing her face with her lunch. the girl smiles at her friend’s sweet words,

“let’s hope that happens soon, the competition is only two days away”

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“bro fuck this!” woonhak’s feet drag against the marble floors as he enters the classroom. “still no luck?” jaehyun asks, mindlessly stacking up his playing cards into some sort of structure on his desk. “seriously! why doesn’t anyone wanna dance with me? i’m literally the kim woonhak. i’m the best hip-hop dancer in this whole school!” the boy exclaims as he slumps down on a chair, the strength of his words sending his friend’s card structure to fall apart. jaehyun sighs, “dude, maybe if you weren’t such an arrogant asshole, someone would actually willingly work with you. just a thought” he ends his sentence with a click of the tongue before beginning to pick up his cards again. “ugh, whatever! it’s just so stupid…” the frustrated boy hunches over, the contact of his lips against the fabric of his jacket muffling his voice. “why don’t you dance with me, jae?” he suddenly suggests, head tilting to the side hopefully, but his friend just sighs once again. “and what? risk hurting the leg i just finished healing again? nah bro, you’re on your own for this one” the hip-hop dancer lets out one last annoyed groan before he suddenly gets off of his seat, causing his friend to look up at him confused. “where are you going?” jaehyun asks him, wondering why he was beginning to grab all of his things. “to get my mind off things, i’ll see ya later bro” woonhak bids, throwing his backpack over his shoulder. “don’t stress so much, man. you’ll find someone soon, trust” 

“yeah, i better”

the kim boy doesn't know what to do. he had tried everything, and had asked everyone but he still had no one to dance with. that and with the competition being only two days away, it felt as though the boys head was about to explode. sulking, he wanders off to the academy's sports centre, his feet guiding him towards the dance room at the very end of the hall. his mind is all over the place, he doesn't even think to knock before he enters the room, it's usually empty anyways. the boy is lost in his thoughts for a moment, just a moment before the sound of piano enters his ears.

woonhak looks up, quietly shutting the door behind him as he does so and that's when he sees her. yn's eyes are shut, far too lost in the music to even notice his presence. he doesn't make it known either, watching in silence as she twirls on her toes, arms flailing up and down so gracefully as she turned. his eyes begin to glisten, the sheer passion in the way that she moves, 'has she always danced like that?' her feet tapped so delicately against the glossy wooden floors, her energy was strong, it was fierce and yet so vulnerable, like the slightest wrinkle in her light blue leggings could just ruin it all. the boy is in awe, eyes never leaving as they followed her across the room. her eyes remain closed, the piano number getting faster as she waltzed over to one end, preparing herself for the climax of her routine. taking a deep breath, her arms extend and a single leg lifts up into an arabesque. slowly, she returns into the fourth position, one foot crossing over the other, and her arms resting in front of her lower abdomen. yn twirls into a double pirouette, her arms swinging to her side as she leaps into a grand jeté. she's done it, her killing move that's supposed to win her all the roses, but just before her toes could grace the floors again, a loud thud had shaken her out of focus, causing her to slip against the ground and fall.

catching her breath, the confused girl looks up to find the culprit. her eyes wander over to the mirror, narrowing angrily as she watches her sworn enemy pick up the bag he had dropped just a moment ago. the bag that had made the loud noise that ruined her routine. yn gets up from off of the floor, fixing her leg warmers as she walked over to him. "what the fuck is your problem?!" she yells, not giving him enough time to explain before yelling some more. "i was literally about to land that jeté off so clean and then you just had to come in here and ruin it, didn't you?!" if this were a kid's show, there would be cheap cgi steam blowing right out of her bright red ears. "and you're not even gonna say anything? what are you, stupid?!" her breaths get heavier, partially from the routine she had just done and partially from the immense anger she was feeling. woonhak stares blankly at her, breathing softly before he finally speaks.

"woah"

the girl scoffs, shes at a lost for words, the singular person she hated the most interrupts her alone time and the only thing he can bring himself to say is "woah?!" yn's about to throw a fit, veins popping out of her forehead in rage. he notices, finally pulling himself back into reality. "no, it's just..." woonhak finally speaks coherent words, her eyebrow raises, unsure of what idiotic thing he was going to say next. "i never noticed how good you are at what you do" his voice is hushed, as if he were embarrassed to speak any louder, and his words shock her, a faint gasp escaping her lips. the ballerina's features soften, as though all the anger had left her body in the blink of an eye. "huh...?" she asks, still taken aback. "no, seriously. i don't think i've ever seen someone dance with so much..." he pauses, eyebrows furrowed as he searches for the right word, nodding his head slightly when he finds it. "passion. i've never seen anyone dance so passionately like that. the way you move so effortlessly yet with so much energy...i mean i hate to admit it but, that's impressive" yn doesn't understand where this was all coming from, what happened to the mean and arrogant woonhak, why was he being so sweet?

"oh...thank...thank you" shes never been complimented this way before by anyone, much less by her sworn nemesis himself, she didn't know how to react and all she could do was just stare at him blankly. they held eye contact for a moment, it was different from their usual staring contests though. this time, instead of pure hatred for one another, there was some sort of peace. after about a minute the girl feels reality seeping back into her skull, she clears her throat before awkwardly averting her gaze over to her water bottle that was sitting atop the wooden shelf to her right. "so um...what brings you here again?" yn asks after taking a large sip of water, her voice going back to normal as she straightens out her back to look at him. "nobody wanted to be my partner for the competition so i came here to blow off some steam, that's all. i didn't know you were in here...sorry about that" woonhak scratches the back of his neck and to his surprise yn laughs, the boy swears this was the first time he had ever seen her smile- well, genuinely smile at least. "what's so funny?" he asks when she keeps laughing, his tone going back to it's usual intensity. "nothing. i just...never thought i'd be talking to you like this. you know...with out the whole cussing each other out every two seconds thing? i guess it's just kind of...silly" yn bends down to pack up her things as she talks, woonhak watching as he leaned against the barre in front of the mirror. "yeah...i guess so" he says, trailing off and not really knowing how to continue their conversation. "anyways, i'm done in here so i guess i'll leave you alone now...have to find a partner anyways" the hip-hop dancer nods, watching as she begins to leave. the door shuts closed and the boy is left with this pressure in his chest and a weird feeling in his tummy. an idea begins to simmer into his brain and the boy is left in dilemma. 'no, no, it's a bad idea- no, just do it! no don't it won't work no-' he sighs,

"ugh, fuck it!"

within seconds the boy is running out the door, "yn!" he calls out and the girl stops in her tracks. "what do you want now?" she asks, rolling her eyes tiredly as she turns to face him. "well..." he stutters, mind suddenly melting into mush as he hastily gathers his thoughts together. "you don't have a partner yet, right?" she rolls her eyes once more, "woonhak, if you're just here to rub my loss in my face just get it over with already!" the girl remembers he's her enemy, the atmosphere going back to it's competitive ways, juxtaposing the peace they had before. "no, that's not it- just listen to me" he practically begs, a side of him she had never seen before, intriguing. she takes one step forward, so as to invite him to continue. "the competition is in two days, and neither of us have partners and i saw you in there just now, i saw your talent and i just..." he rambles for a moment and then trails off, taking a deep breath in before letting it out again. "okay, have you ever seen honey 3?" his question confuses her, "i mean yeah...it's one of my favourite movies but what exactly is your point here, woonhak?" yn raises an eyebrow, beginning to get impatient. "melea and ishani hate each other but they come together to work on that show and it turned out amazing! i'm just saying...your ballet and my hip-hop..." he drags, nodding slowly in the hopes that she'd get what he was trying to say. yn snickers, looking down at the floor as she slowly makes her way closer to him. "are you suggesting we combine ballet and hip-hop and enter this competition together?" she asks and he nods almost hesitantly. she lets out a long sigh. a sigh that worries him a little bit. "c'mon its just one competition, and i know you want that trophy as much as i do" the ballet dancer's ear perks up at the sound of the grand prize, her eyes trailing up to meet with his own hopeful ones. "i guess it would be cool to combine ballet and hip-hop..." the moment those words came out of her mouth the boy felt as though a huge weight had been lifted off of his shoulders. shooting her the brightest smile, a smile she had never seen before, "so you're in then?" woonhak asks one last time, his now shining eyes full of hope. yn rolls her eyes as she nods finally,

"as long as i get to bring the trophy home"

౨ৎ

"so you found a partner for the competition?" asks hyein as she walks closely beside yn, their arms intertwined as they entered the school's cafeteria. the ballet dancer nods, "mhm and we're gonna be busy working on the routine, so i'm gonna have to skip out on our fro-yo run today" she says and her friend hums in response. "so...who is it?" hyein wonders, widening her eyes with curiosity as she inquires her best-friend. "i'm...i'm not telling!" yn replies, a rosy tint painting the tips of her ears and her cheeks as she did so, as if she were embarrassed. suspicious, hyein thought, but she just sighs, deciding to let her friend do what she must and not really wanting to pressure her into telling. she was going to find out anyways.

on the opposite end of the hallway, the kim boy and his friend are on their own journey towards the cafeteria. "c'mon man, you're seriously not going to tell me?" jaehyun complains when woonhak shakes his head for the hundredth time. "no. you'll find out later, i'm not telling you- you'll laugh" the tall boy says, stroking a hand through his dark hair. "ugh fine...i wonder what's for lunch" his friend trails off as they enter the large dining hall, stomachs gurgling slightly as a familiar scent entered their noses. the two guys exhale in unison, "pizza"

"look who it is" the voice shakes the boys out of their trance. "if it isn't mr. hip-hop wonder boy and...and" hyein racks her brain trying to find a good enough nickname for his friend. "ugh, i got nothing. loser" she says finally, a hint of spite in the way she spoke. jaehyun rolls his eyes, "hyein" he responds, eyes squinting slightly. "hey..." yn suddenly speaks, looking up awkwardly at the tall dancer boy. "'sup" woonhak responds in a similar tone, an arm reaching up to scratch the back of his head. their friends look at each other confused, why are they being so...weird? just then the boy's stomach makes another loud noise, to which he clears his throat in embarrassment. "well um...gonna go eat, see ya around" the usually obnoxious hip-hop dancer nods softly at the ballerina before turning on his heels and walking away, leaving the girl and her best-friend standing there dumbfounded.

"see ya around?" hyein repeats his words, a look of blatant confusion present on her face. "what was that about?" she asks, looking over at her best-friend who seemed to be staring off into space. "huh? what do you mean?" yn asks back, fixing her posture and the fold of her knit bolero that was beginning to slip down her arms. "yn, do you even realize what just happened? that was your literal enemy and you guys just interacted without arguing or trying to kill each other!" the girl's statement is dramatic, over-emphasized, and her eyes are wide like she had just seen a ghost. her friend just shrugs, "so?" her voice is calm, but there was a hint of hesitance. hyein just sighs, taking a seat beside the girl who was acting so very...

"strange" jaehyun states, taking a large bite out of his slice of pepperoni pizza. "what is?" woonhak asks after swallowing a bite of his own. "you. you and yn" the boy is confused by his friend's words, "what about me and yn?" jaehyun sighs, pushing away his now empty disposable plate as he takes a sip out of his water bottle before turning to fully face the other boy. "you guys just talked to each other without uttering a single cuss word, and to be real with you bro, the last time that's ever happened was like before the elementary school talent show" the dancer rolls his eyes, shrugging as he did so. "so what? i can't talk to her normally for once?" woonhak was defensive all of a sudden, his friend taken aback by his attitude change. "i'm just saying man...it's just strange, that's all"

౨ৎ

"okay i gotta get to practice, i'll see you at the competition tomorrow, right?" yn asks her friend, looking up from where she had bent down to tie her shoe. "mhm! i'll be there...i really want to know who you're dancing with- i can't believe you still won't tell me! i mean he can't be that bad!" hyein rambles, her arms crossed over the purple note-book she had pressed against her chest. yn rolls her eyes as she gets up, stretching softly before fixing the strands that stuck out of the top knot on her head. "you'll see tomorrow, i gotta go now. love you, see you!" the ballerina bids her friend goodbye, walking away towards the sports centre. "something tells me you'll see me a little sooner..." hyein whispers to herself as she watches her friend disappear, a mischievous smirk playing against her lips.

"i'll catch you later bro. good luck" jaehyun tells woonhak, turning around to leave as the dancer boy entered the sports centre. his steps are slow at first, lifting his phone up to check the time as he walked. "fuck" he cussed, picking up his pace when the numbers on his screen registered in his head. panting, the boy finally makes it to the front of the dance room, the sound of faint music seeping into the atmosphere as he opened the door.

"you're late"

yn looks annoyed, her forehead twitching slightly as she paused the song to glare at him. "by like ten minutes! relax a little" he rolled his eyes, dropping his back-pack down on the floor and taking off his jacket. "yeah, ten minutes of our precious time wasted!" the girl spat, arms crossed and eyebrows furrowed. woonhak chuckled, "i knew ballerinas were all uptight but damn, you really are something else" his words are laced with mockery as he begins to walk towards her. she's fuming, gathering up all the strength and composure in her body to stop herself from pushing him right out the door then and there. "i hate you" she mutters, a pout taking over her complexion as she turns away from him angrily. the boy laughs, "c'mon princess let's start this thing before we waste anymore of our precious time" the condescending tone paired with the sudden nickname catches her off guard for a moment, a pink tint that matched her pink track-suit growing against the skin of her face. he noticed it, smiling to himself proudly when she wasn't looking.

"and one, two, three and four and jump down, pop and lock. there you go!" the boy claps as he counts, watching her moves closely from the mirror. the girl pants, bending down with her hands on her knees as she tries to catch her breath. "that was good...finally" he smirks sarcastically, a prideful look on his face when she shoots him a breathy "fuck you". yn stands up straight again, her face is red and stained with sweat from the intense sequence of dance moves she just did. woonhak can't help but laugh, "i didn't know ballerinas could sweat" he teased, tossing her a towel in the process. the girl just sighs, "whatever" but that only fed into his ego, "those weren't even the hardest hip-hop moves and you're already struggling" his words brewed a sort of fire in her veins, "i'd like to see you try landing a grand jeté en pointe" she says sternly, staring him straight in the eyes. the boy scoffs, "your fancy french words don't scare me" she takes this as a challenge, a smirk placed prettily on her plush lips as she throws her towel across the room.

"follow my lead"

he watches as she twirls over to the center of the room, even in a pair of sneakers, yn grows an inch taller as she effortlessly stands on her toes. her arms form a perfect circle above her head as she spins once, then twice before jumping off the ground as though she could fly. without making a single sound, the girl lands right back down on her toes, her heels never once making contact with the wooden floors until she returns to the fourth position, her torso bending forward and her arms stretching back like a swan. the ballerina stands back up again, the edges of her mouth cracking into a proud smile when she looks in the mirror to see the amazed look on his face. chuckling softly, she turns around. "your turn"

locking back in, woonhak's face goes from stunned to arrogant in a matter of seconds. his chest puffed out as he walks over to the center of the room. "watch and learn" he says, eyebrows knitted together as he begins to recall her moves. the boy twirls over before trying his best to stand on his toes, stumbling a bit as he did so. his form almost makes her cringe as he attempts at her signature double pirouette, she winces as he leaps into the jeté, if you can even call it that, on the wrong foot, sending him flying almost stupidly in the air. she could feel the punchline coming, giggling quietly as she pulls out her phone and begins recording. the hip-hop dancer is about to make his landing, his breath hitching softly as he begins his descent onto the floor. for a moment it was perfect, the boy landing right on his toes. just for a split second though, before he slips down and falls right on his bottom and onto the ground.

"ah!" he groans, laying his back down in frustration. yn laughs out loud, walking towards him with the camera right at his face. "stop it" he whined, hands moving up to push her away and then to cover his face in embarrassment. "aw, cheer up woonhak! look, i got you stellar landing on video!" she teases, still recording the poor boy as he rolls around in despair. yn laughs, putting her phone away before reaching an arm out for him to grab and helping him up. "so you agree that ballet is just as hard as hip-hop now?" she asks, smiling in victory as the boy massages his sore feet. he rolls his eyes, "i guess...but in my defense that was probably like an extremely professional move or something!" he argues, not wanting to lose to her. the girl laughs, "whatever you say..." yn pauses to have a sip of her water, trying her best to ignore the way that he stared at her. woonhak shoots her a smile before making his way to the speaker.

"now come on, let's finish this routine"

the next three or so hours are spent perfecting their performance, pausing every now and then to monitor their moves and go over every meticulous detail. when they felt complacent with their practice, the supposed rivals sit down beside each other on the floor, their backs leaning against the mirrored walls as they watched the recording of their routine on his tablet. yn's eyes are sharp as a hawk, not blinking once as she goes through every single second of the duet, breaking into a slight smile when she likes something. similarly, the boy's lips are pursed as he focuses in on the video, letting out little hums every now and then along to the beat of the song.

"aye~" woonhak says as the video comes to an end, clapping his hands in satisfaction before turning to look at the girl to his right who displayed the same pleased expression. "you're really good" yn says plainly, her tone coming off a little shy, perhaps because she had never complimented him before. his breathing gets louder, stunned by the sudden praise. "thanks. so are you" he says quietly, the room falling silent as they sat and stared at each other. the moment lasts longer than usual, it felt like the world around them had just stopped. there was something new about the atmosphere, were his eyes always this bright? , did she always smell this sweet? about a billion questions ran through their heads but not a single word was uttered within those five minutes of solitude. just then, the buzz of her phone snaps them out of their daze. yn shakes her head, blinking rapidly as he clears his throat, looking anywhere but at her.

"shit, it's getting late- um, we better go home and get some rest. it's the day tomorrow so..." the ballerina stutters, something people rarely ever see her do, but he's been seeing it a lot recently. the boy nods, getting up after her and beginning to gather up his things. woonhak waits for her, watching as she carefully puts all her belongings in her duffle bag. he noticed the way she organizes, the biggest things going in first and then all the smaller ones. "okay" yn says, de-tangling her wired earphones as she walks up to him, finally looking him in the eye again. they share an awkward smile before the tension in the room started to feel...silly. the girl laughs softly, covering her mouth with her hand as she did so. cute, he thought, but he didn't have the heart to say it out loud. "c'mon" woonhak says, tilting his head towards the door. the pair walked quite close to each other, making small conversation about their competition that was just one night away. at one point he makes some cheesy joke, it wasn't that funny but it sent the girl into a fit that made her stomach hurt.

they were about to exit the sports centre, his hand already on the handle when a figure (or two?) emerges from the shadows. "HAH! you've been caught!" it's hyein, "so your partner is..." and jaehyun. the supposed rivals' best-friends look each other in the eye before turning to look back at the pair in shock, "YN?" - "WOONHAK?" they spoke, or rather yelled, in unison. the dancers' eyes widen in surprise at the sudden appearance of their friends, her mouth fell open to speak but no words seemed to have come out. "look over there!" woonhak exclaims, pointing at the roof, waiting for his friend, and hers, to look away before grabbing yn's hand and running out the door.

the dancer duo laugh manically as they skipped through the cobblestone of their high school, their feet tapping on the ground in sync as they began to slow down near the gated exit. woonhak tries to catch his breath, his hand still intertwined with hers. yn is the first to notice, but for some reason she couldn't bring herself to let go. maybe it was the sunset illuminating against his hair, maybe it was the slight shimmer of his sweat, combined with the giddy feeling in her heart that she just could not describe, but it was perfect. something about this whole sequence of events just felt right.

unbeknownst to the both of them, their friends stayed close by, watching from behind the bushes at the scene unfolding before them. hyein snorts, finding it all to be just so amusing. jaehyun sighs, a joyous look on his face as he turns to the girl. "you thinking what i'm thinking?" he asks, eyebrows wiggling up and down as he did so. hyein nods before her gaze falls back onto the so-called enemies.

"they're soooo into each other"

౨ৎ

that night yn couldn't bring herself to sleep, her stomach swarming with a million butterflies and her mind just clouded with anxiety as she ran through the choreography over and over again. woonhak's night was no different, his dinner felt like it was about to exit through his mouth as he silently danced in front of his bathroom mirror. he could lie and say he was nervous to perform, he could lie and say that was why he felt so uneasy, but the truth was that it was her. no matter what the boy tried to do that night, when he tried to sleep, when he tried to dance, even when he so much as tried to think, his mind would go back to her. yn ln, the so-called arch nemesis that he seemed to be hung up on all night.

eventually though, the dancer duo did sleep. the exhaustion from non-stop practices finally crashing onto their tired teen bodies. a loud beep wakes the girl up, an arm reaching out to turn off her obnoxious alarm. yn lays there for a moment, gathering her thoughts before sitting up, stretching her torso forward until she touched her toes. she yawns quietly as she gets off of her bed, waltzing over to her desk and unplugging her fully charged phone. she smiles softly as she skims through her best-friend's countless of texts from last night, letting out a sigh as a new notification from her calendar pops up.

'D-DAY! take home that trophy, yn!'

over in the neighbouring complex, kim woonhak is woken up by his mother's voice. "woonhak! don't you have a competition to go to?" the woman's words wake him up almost immediately. sitting up straight and reaching to grab his phone from the bed-side table next to him, a large grin takes over his face at the countdown timer,

'just a couple hours remaining! go get em' tiger!'

the rest of the pair's morning was spent preparing for the main event of the day. she took a shower, spreading her outfit out on the bed before taking the time to do her make-up so that it was just perfect. the boy did the same, even taking the time to shave the hair he barely even had on his face. before leaving the house, yn checked her reflection in the mirror, she wore her light-pink leotard and her favourite lilac leg warmers but, to feed into their duet's concept, she wore her hair down and paired her leotard with oversized denim jorts and some sneakers. it was different, definitely something you'd rarely see her in, but it made her smile. something about this new look on her felt good, she felt...

"pretty" woonhak says as he stands before her in their usual dance room at the academy's sports centre. "huh?" yn asked as if she didn't catch what the boy had said, but she could hear him loud and clear, she knew exactly what he said. "pretty" he repeated confidently, much to her surprise, as he walked closer to her. "you should wear your hair down more often" the girl could not believe her ears, her mind going blank as a blush crept up against her cheeks. woonhak laughs at her flustered face, smiling to himself as he passed her and over to the speakers.

"let's run through the choreo once more, shall we?"

౨ৎ

what felt like a split second had gone by and the pair were suddenly back-stage, standing amongst a bunch of other duos scrambling around to rehearse once more before the show had to start. five minutes before the show hyein and jaehyun came by to wish their friends good luck, telling them to have fun and whatnot before they left to get to their seats in the crowd. the show begins shortly after, the mc making a few opening comments before bringing in the first few contestants. yn watches from behind the curtains, her breathing getting unsteady the more she did so. "damn...they're good, but we'll be better, right?" woonhak asks, turning to his left when he hears no answer. "right, yn?" but the ballerina that once stood beside him was long gone, disappearing right before his eyes.

it only takes the boy two minutes to find her crouched down behind an abandoned prop, her knees to her chest and her head resting down on them. "yn?" he calls out softly, taking cautious steps towards the shaking girl. "what's wrong?" woonhak crouches down in front of her, his head tilting off to one side in confusion. he had never seen her this way before, the ever-so-confident girl was...

"nervous?" she nods shakily at his inquiry, slowly lifting her head up to look at him. "i um...i kind of have like...stage fright" the boy is dumbfounded, he looked so lost. how could a star ballerina like yn ln have stage fright? woonhak took a seat next to her, "but you always do so well on the stage? i thought you loved it" he speaks, his tone calm and, to the girl, somewhat comforting. "no, i do. i have no problem when i'm on the stage...it's just the moments before it- like right now, it freaks me out" for some reason it ached him to see her this way. the girl who never showed fear being so vulnerable just for him to see, it made him feel something like a burn in his chest.

"listen..." he starts all of a sudden, moving his body fully so that he faced her. "i know we're sworn enemies and everything but i've seen you dance long enough to know that you've literally got nothing to be freaked out about" the boy's eyes are big when he talks, like he was speaking straight out of his heart. "like those duos out there? they don't stand a chance against us! i mean ballet and hip-hop? they won't see us coming" he ends his short pep-talk with a smile, a contagious one that causes the girl to mimic it. "when did you get so civil? i like this new civil woonhak" yn laughs, finding her rival's switch in demeanor strange. "you make us lose this one and civil woonhak is gone forever" he jokes, earning an eye-roll in return. "well i guess we better win then" she says just in time for their names to be called out through the large speakers that synced with the mc's microphone.

"let's go show them. you know, like the french say..." the boy trails off. "pas day do or don't" she cringes at his awful pronunciation. "it's pas de deux. and no, i don't think the french say that." yn teases, "but yeah..." she shoots one last smile at him before they climb onto the stage.

"let's go show them"

the infamous rivals' entrance to the stage is followed by a round of applause and a couple surprised gasps and whispers. getting into position, woonhak and yn look each other in the eye, mouthing faint good lucks before the music began to play. just as choreographed, the routine begins with a somber piano tune, the girl showing off her technique as she twirls into the ballet portion of the piece. her partner gets into character, moving along with her, their arms and legs moving in sync. the piano music quiets down as the pair begin to circle each other, their feet waltzing coordinately when the musical number gets faster and faster. with fierce eyes the girl skips to the other side of the stage, still en pointe, and he trails closely behind her, catching her in his embrace as she gracefully poses in his arms. the music fades away as the pair stare into each other's eyes, woonhak spins her around once and then twice before lifting her up into the air. yn's arms flail up delicately, her eyes shut and her head titled towards the sky. they hold this pose for a beat, a singular beat before the music changes, her head turning to face the crowd with a cocky smirk and a wink. woonhak tossed the girl down, yn landing right into the starting position of their transition into his style.

the dancer duo part ways, jumping around to hype up the audience for the second portion of their routine. following the beat, they reunite right at the center of the stage, shooting each other a cheerful look before the beat drops and they fall right back into their choreography. the hip-hop tune is loud and up-beat, juxtaposing the previous classical number. woonhak gleams as he does what he knows best, his arms waving energetically as his feet glide smoothly against the floor. yn, who worked extra hard to adapt to his style, follows right beside him, the two of them having too much fun getting lost in the music. coming to the end of the song the boy kicked off the freestyle portion, his legs ricocheting as he finishes his criss cross into a dougie. the girl giggles when he bows down to her, offering the center of the stage for her to show off her own moves this time. yn smiles, taking a moment to let the beat sink into her body before she gets on her toes again. the feeling of doing ballet to a hip-hop track was new, but like all the new things she had experiences these past few days, it felt just right.

yn ends her freestyle off with her usual double pirouette, landing right in front of the boy before dropping into the pop and lock move he had taught her the day prior. woonhak's mouth drops at her sudden dance, head turning towards the crowd who began to cheer all too loudly. the dancing pair nodded at each other, signalling the grand finale of their unexpected duet. to the beat of the song, yn spins over to one end of the stage, opposite the boy who had freestyled his way to the other side. suspense builds as the girl stretches one leg out, her torso bending towards it as she hits the infamous swan pose, hastily getting up on her toes, preparing herself for the grand jeté. she breathes in deeply as she runs, building up the momentum for her final leap. yn's legs at a perfect angle, her arms curving over her pretty face, it looked like she was floating. below her, woonhak had hammer-timed half-way through the stage, striking a pose reminiscent to that of michael jackson's as he awaited his partner's landing. about a second later yn lands soundlessly on the tips of her feet, wasting no time before twirling once and twice, finally reaching his embrace again. the song comes to an end, woonhak and yn holding eye contact for a moment before turning away from the crowd, hands intertwined as they sashayed further into the stage. they stopped, turning back to face the audience as they ended their performance off with a deep curtsy.

౨ৎ

"hell yeah!" woonhak cheered as he and yn made it back-stage. she laughs happily, lifting both her hands up for a high-five, which he gladly returned. the duo shared gleeful conversation as they caught their breaths, heading straight to their water bottles to quench their thirst. being that their performance was closer to the end of the event, it didn't take long before the mc's voice struck through the speakers once more, inviting the contestants to join him on stage for the awarding ceremony.

nervously, the ballerina and the hip-hop dancer make their way back onto the stage of their school's auditorium, waving slightly when they make eye contact with their best-friends in the audience. the pair sat down beside each other along with the other contestants, who were complimenting each other and wishing each other good luck. "the judges have decided, and i've got all the scores right here in the palm of my hand" the mc speaks, his mic ringing faintly at the feedback. "but first, the prizes!" he says, moving to the side to reveal the medals and the giant gold trophy. yn's eyes twinkle at the sight, mouth almost watering at the thought of having such a pretty trophy to add to her collection. woonhak notices this, chuckling to himself at the girl's longing expression.

before long, the mc speaks again. this time, to finally announce the winners of the school's annual duet competition. "at third place..." as usual, he drags out his words, inflicting suspense- and impatience- from the contestants and the audience alike. "hikaru and bahiyyih!" the crowd cheers as the female duo get up from their seat, a short dark-haired girl and a taller blonde who did a modern dance performance. they got up on the podium, being awarded the bronze medals before posing for some pictures. "second place..." yn gets anxious, only two more winners left. woonhak grabs onto her hand, causing her to turn to him confused. he just smiled, squeezing her hand in his own as a means of reassurance. "jungwon and riki!" as the runner ups get onto the podium, suspense fills the atmosphere. the ballet dancer and hip-hop one hold their breaths, eyes shut as if to escape from reality. "and in first place...an unexpected duet..." their eyes open once more at the mc's words, it can't be...

"woonhak and yn! congratulations!"

the world stops for a moment and they find themselves drowning out the sound of loud cheers and claps. "dude, that's you! go!" the contestant behind them says, tapping the shoulders of the stunned pair. alas, they get up, finally breaking into large grins as they make their way up to the top of the podium. "congratulations, you two" says one of the judges as he hands each of them a gold medal before finally handing the boy the golden trophy. woonhak catches yn's envious eyes through his peripheral vision, chuckling before nudging her arm making her look at him. "here" he says, letting her hold the grand prize all to herself for the cameras.

"winner, winner, chicken dinner!" jaehyun cheers as he and hyein walk over to their victorious friends. "congrats guys!" the ballerina's friend says, handing them each a single rose. "spent my allowance on fro-yo...that was the best i could get you guys" she said, scratching the back of her neck. "thank you, hyein-ie!" yn exclaims, wrapping her friend up into a big hug. "no problem, girl. and i'm so proud of you- first place!" the boys laugh from beside them, "damn yn, i guess you really do always get what you want" jaehyun jokes, causing her to roll her eyes at him. "what princess wants, princess gets!" woonhak too, teases, patting the girl's head in the process. "whatever...." she trails out, her eyes wandering down to the trophy in her hands.

"what's wrong?" the hip-hop dancer boy asks, his face softening as he looked at her. "nothing....it's just..." yn looks up at him again, pushing the prize onto his chest. "you keep it" his eyebrows furrow at her words, "no..." he begins, pushing the trophy back into her arms, "you keep it. you're the one who wanted it so bad" she scoffs, not wanting to succumb to him, "no you!" their friends watch in silence as the rivals, if we can even call them that anymore, tirelessly bicker, pushing their shared prize back and forth towards each other.

"fine!" the boy finally says, putting an end to their short-lived argument. the girl is about to scream in victory but is interrupted when he starts to speak again. "i'll keep it....if!" woonhak emphasizes the if, the ballerina gulping as he walked closer to her. "if you let good ol' civil woonhak to take you to the movies this weekend?" what was meant to be a clear statement came off as a hopeful question, the boy biting his lip anxiously as he awaited an answer. she wants to tease him, she badly wants to say no, but there's this pathetically hypnotizing look on his face she just can't refuse. "alright. but only if that means civil woonhak is here to stay forever" she finalizes, proposing an end to their on-going rivalry. woonhak smirks, "why? got a little crush on him or something?" he teased, wiggling his eyebrows menacingly as she glared at him in annoyance. "shut up before i change my mind about our date" her voice in monotone now, her face expressionless. "that's not a no~" the boy continues to joke, only stopping when she had balled her hands into fists, threatening to have a go at his face. "okay! okay! i'll stop! don't hurt the face- anything but the face, please!" he pleads and she laughs. "so i'll pick you up tomorrow at 6?" he brings up the date again, smiling sweetly at the ballerina who just nods. "come late and i'll kill you"

"of course, princess"

౨ৎ

"who's civil woonhak, again?" hyein whispers to the boy beside her, watching as their friends get lost in their own world, forgetting about the fact that they were still standing there. "beats me" jaehyun says, "but something tells me they don't hate each other anymore..." the girl nods in agreement, a moment of silence shared between the two.

"called it"

the end.

⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖

finally finished this fic! i've been planning n writing it this whole week, i can't believe she's finally done! TT reblogs and feedback is highly appreciated! hope u guys enjoyed reading this as much as i did writing it <3 also if ure a dancer, apologies for any inaccuracies TT

[ohlawdthebirds]

Truth or Dare (Vi x Reader)

Euughh, its been a while since I've posted a fic. Enjoy! This is a modern au inspired by those Cut 'truth or drink' videos.

Cw: Mild mention of drinking (swapped out the alc for juice, so hopefully that's not a trigger for anyone). Other than that, slight violence mention.

Also! Thank you to @pixievi for these links!

Gonna tag a few of my mutuals here because I think they'd enjoy this (I hope that's okay! Please let me know if not and I'll remove you from the list!): @sweetercalypso @xthescarletbitch @vvynia @kittyt-hexxed @ellsss

“So, do you know why you’re here?”

You can just barely make out the person standing behind the camera. The build of the camera blocks off most of their face and for a moment it creeps you out; being in this sterile warehouse, sitting at a table with your best friend across from you has you briefly wondering just what Vi is cooking up. The two of you often joked about being put in Saw traps but you weren’t entirely sure you’d be willing to part with your organs and appendages should the occasion call for it.

“Ah, I think so,” you say. Vi turns to you, gently nudging your foot under the table. You recognize the gesture immediately: it was something the two of you did when you were younger and wanted to check in on the other. In this case, the nudge meant Are you okay? We can go if you need to. You nudge her foot back twice, your way of saying I’m okay.

“I’m here to do truth or drink, best friends edition. At least, that’s what she told me,” You reply, gesturing at Vi. She ducks her head, cheeks visibly coloring. The person behind the camera, someone you now suspected was the producer, speaks up once more.

“Okay then, you two can get started with a shot if you want.”

Vi grabs an unlabeled bottle and fills up both shot glasses before nudging yours towards your awaiting fingers. You bring the glass up, clinking it with Vi’s, before bringing it to your mouth. You are surprised when sweet juice instead of alcohol hits your tongue. Vi peeks out at you from under her fringe, a gentle smile gracing her lips. She knew you were trying to cut back on your alcohol intake, so knowing that she asked for an alternative warmed your heart. Vi sets her shot glass down and reaches out to the middle of the table, selecting a card from the stack. She leans back in her seat, huffing out a soft laugh.

“How did we meet?” She places the card down and looks at you expectantly. You grin, sitting up straighter in your seat.

“Okay so we went to the same high school, right? Vi had an…interesting haircut,” Vi barks out a laugh at this while you try (and fail) to suppress your chuckling, “Yeah, it was like…like someone threw scissors at her head and hoped for the best. It was like the unholy merging of a slick back, a pixie cut, and a fuck ass bob.” You barely finish your sentence as laughter wracks your body. Vi’s bark turns into a howl that you soon join. As soon as your laughter dies down, you continue, “This group of boys came up to her during lunch one day and were making fun of her. I stepped in and was telling them to leave her alone when she jumps out of her seat and absolutely socks this guy in his face! He falls, his friends jump in to try and defend his honor, and next thing you know it’s me and her against these dudes. It was brutal I tell you. They lost and ended up transferring schools and Vi and I were sacked with in-school suspension for a week. It was glorious.”

You reach out to grab a card. “What is your favorite feature of mine? Can be physical or personality-wise,” you place the card down and sit back. Vi leans her elbows onto the table, eyes meeting yours. “You have gorgeous eyes,” she says, “They’re so expressive, and I love the way they light up whenever you’re happy or excited. It’s one of the things that drew me to you back in high school. You were so bright and fiery, and the way you jumped in to help me with no hesitation has always amazed me.”

Your hands come up to rest on your heated cheeks. She leans forward once more to select a card off the pile. “Didn’t expect you to do two of them,” you giggle out. Vi feigns shock, replying “Ah, my bad, didn’t even realize it.” But the glint in her eyes tells you she absolutely meant every word.

“What are my green flags?” Vi drops the card back down to the table. You fold your hands under your chin and lean against them.

“You’re one of the toughest people I’ve ever met. And I don’t just mean physically, I mean emotionally as well. You don’t let anyone tell you what to do, I can’t remember the last time I’ve seen you genuinely scared. And it’s not like you don’t get scared, but you’re usually so on top of things, y’know?”

“Oh yeah, I’m definitely on top of things,” Vi smirks. You don’t bother holding back a grin. “But yeah, you make me want to be stronger. I want you to be able to rely on me the way I’m able to lean on you.” The blush on Vi’s cheeks only deepens. You lean forward once more to grab a card from the table.

“How good are you at kissing?” This time you don’t fully put the card down, instead twiddling and fidgeting with it. Vi chews on her bottom lip for a second before her eyes lock with yours. You expect to see her signature smirk on her face once again, but you’re surprised by the sincerity in her eyes. Vi thinks for a moment before reaching over to the bottles and pouring herself a shot. Your eyes widen with mirth.

“Oh, not going to tell me?” you grin.

Vi pauses for a moment before looking at you over the top of her shot glass. “You can always find out for yourself, you know,” she says before knocking back the drink. You gape at her, astonished, and not for the first time you wonder what Vi’s lips would feel like on yours. It’s been a reoccurring thought ever since high school, one that you’d tried to brush off time and time again. Years of friendship between the two of you had culminated in you developing an intense crush on Vi. There were numerous moments over the years where you thought about confessing to her, but something always stopped you. Whether it was you fearing the potential end of your friendship, or someone literally interrupting you, you were never able to tell Vi how you truly felt.

“Alright, so as you can see, there is only one card left on the table. Vi, that one is yours. Make sure you read it out loud and clear, okay?” The producer chirps out. Vi tenses before reaching out and sliding the card to herself. She pauses for a moment, taking a deep breath before flipping it over.

“I, um…so, this last card is daring me to tell you the real reason you’re here.” You quirk an eyebrow. Vi continues, “I didn’t bring you here just because you’re my best friend.”

Your heartbeat picks up and for a moment you worry it will pound right out of your chest.

“I brought you here to tell you…that I have a crush on you,” Vi said, her lips curving into a sheepish grin. For a moment, the world goes still, and you wonder if you’re dreaming. You cough out a “What?”, eyes fixated on the woman in front of you. “You have a crush on me?”

Vi nods. “Ever since that day in high school you’ve been it for me. I know this has been a long time coming, but I could never find the right time to tell you.”

“I could never find the right time to tell you!” You exclaim. “All this time, all these years, you mean to tell me we were both crushing on each other?”

Your hands cover your face as you let out a groan that soon evaporates into a laugh. Vi joins you with a laugh of her own. The absurdity of it all is hilarious to you: of the woman you’ve been crushing on for years not only reciprocating your feelings but going to the trouble of dragging you into a video to confess said feelings.

Once your laughter has subsided, you and Vi are left gazing at each other. “Well, at least we finally know we’re on the same page,” she says. You nod, attempting (and failing) to hold back a grin.

“Alright, so you guys clearly feel the same for each other!” The producer says. You hear the mischief in their voice and brace yourself for what’s coming. “You guys should definitely seal the deal, y’know?”

“H-how do you suppose we do that?” You stutter out.

“You could always seal things with a kiss!”

The heat on your cheeks only flares hotter. Vi’s own face is searing by this point. There’s no way you could kiss her! And in front of a camera no less! But at the same time you wonder if this is the only chance you have, if the adrenaline coursing through you was enough to propel you forward. Just when you were internally making a pros and cons list (the pro being to kiss your best friend and the con being potential ridicule from internet strangers) Vi nudges your foot under the table. Are you okay with this?

Only a moment later do you nudge back twice: I’m okay with it. I’m really okay with it.

With a surge of courage, you sit up in your seat and lean forward. Vi follows suit, meeting you in the middle of the table. It only takes a moment for your lips to meet.

You grin into the kiss, tilting your head just the slightest to deepen it. Vi’s hand comes up to cup your cheek. Your hand reaches up to rest on it and it’s only when the producer and crew begin clapping and cheering do the two of you separate.

The two of you are beaming harder than you thought possible, and everything feels limitless. Despite having no alcohol in your system, you feel fuzzy and warm. Vi sneaks in one last peck to your lips before you sit down. Once things calm down and you’re seated the producer speaks up one last time.

“We actually have one bonus card for you two.” A crew member steps forward and lays a card down in front of Vi. Her brows furrow in confusion but she picks it up nonetheless and reads it. A tiny smile graces her lips as she sets the card down, reaching across the table to place her hands on yours. “Will you go on a date with me?”

You gently clasp your hands with hers, bringing them up to place a kiss on the backs of them. “I’d love to go on a date with you, Vi.”

-

A few weeks after filming, you and Vi are notified that your video was live on the channel. You pull it up on your laptop and snuggle next to your girlfriend on her couch. Vi snorts and laughs the whole way through it while you hide behind your hands and join in her laughter. The comments are surprisingly wonderful, everything from people cooing over how cute the two of you are, to others lamenting over being single. Every last one of them brings a smile to your face. And as Vi keeps clicking through and pointing out the funniest ones, you lean into her side, pressing kisses to her skin.

“Hey love?”

“Yeah?” She asks.

“I’m really glad you brought us on a random YouTube video.”

Vi turns and presses a kiss to your lips.

“Me too.”

[biancadjarin]

Just Thinking about bully!eddie

calling fem!reader at home.

18+

The phone on your nightstand rings and wakes you up from a deep sleep. You look at the clock on your wall and it’s quarter to 1 in the morning. You ignore the ringing and roll over to try to go back to sleep.

But the phone rings again. And again. And AGAIN. you finally rip the receiver off the base and rasp out a tired “Hello?”

“Fuck babe why do I have to call so many times before you answer?” Eddie growls into the phone. You shake your head, trying to wake up and wrap your head around what’s happening.

“Eddie?” You ask. “Eddieee?” He mocks in a nasally, girly tone. “Yeah it’s fucking Eddie. What’s wrong with you, your voice sounds weird.” “M’sick.” You say, throat sore and dry. “Think I have a cold.”

“S’that why you weren’t at school today?” He asks you. You hate missing school but it’s a Friday so you figure not much happens right before the weekend anyway.

“Mhm.” You respond. “We had a pop quiz in algebra. Do you know what that means?” You do. Eddie always copies off of you in math. “Um.. you didn’t have anyone to copy off of?” “That’s right. So if I fail this class, it’s going to be your fault.”

You wince at his words. “I’m sorry Eddie but I didn’t know there’d be a quiz. That’s kind of what the word pop means.” “You think I don’t know that? You trying to call me stupid, slut?” “No, I just don’t want to argue with you. I wanna go back to sleep.” “I’m coming over. Need to teach you what happens when you talk back.” “Eddie no!” You yell as loud as possible without waking your parents down the hall.

“I don’t wanna get you sick.” “I don’t care. I need to see you.” “You’ll wake up my parents. They’ll be so mad Eddie please.” You try to reason with him.

You hear him take a deep sigh before a rustling sound. “Fine. If I can’t come over then you’re going to help me.” “Help you? How?” “Tell me what you’re wearing.” You roll your eyes. He’s such a perv. But if this gets him off your back for the night, so be it.

“Uhm…” you look down at your pj’s. “I’m wearing black stretchy panties and an old Hawkins High T-shirt.” “Mmm what do your panties look like?” He asks breathily. You hear a slapping sound behind him. “They’re like a bikini cut.. I don’t know. Kinda tight but stretchy and thin. They’re comfy.”

He makes a pained groan sound. “I wish I could see you in them. I was so pissed when you weren’t at school today. I miss-” he cut himself off with a moan. Your heart starts to race as you start to feel a throbbing between your legs. “You… you missed me today?” You ask nervously.

He chuckles a little, breath still shallow. “Shut up. Take off your shirt. What do your tits look like? Describe them.” The slapping sound is louder now, and an occasional wet schlick sound. You do as he tells you, slipping your top over your head. The cool air of your room makes your nipples pull tight and get hard.

“Ok… uhm my… my tits are round and squishy? And my nipples are… uhm…” “I bet they’re nice and hard huh, babe? Bet you want me to suck them and fuck your tight virgin pussy don’t you?”

Before you can answer him, he’s groaning painfully into the phone. “Fuck fuck y/n!” He’s repeating your name. “Shit I need a towel, hold on.” You wait a few seconds for him to come back. You pull your shirt back on, nipples popping through the thin fabric, your panties too soaked to keep wearing.

“You still there?” He asks breathlessly. “Yeah I’m here.” “Such a good girl for me. I feel a lot better now.” You smile against the phone, not sure why he’s being so nice all of a sudden but really liking how it feels. His voice can be so scary and cold but sometimes, like right now, it’s cute and light. Almost sweet. He reminds you of a puppy.

“I should go to bed Eddie. My cold medicine is making me really sleepy.” You tell him. He sighs and he almost sounds.. disappointed? It makes your stomach flutter that he doesn’t want you to go.

“Listen…” he starts. “The other night, at the party. When you sat on my lap when we smoked…” “Yeah?” You urged him on. What will he say? He liked being that close to you? He liked your fingers in his hair? He wants to smoke with you again?

“You probably got sick from that. Passing the joints around. You need a stronger immune system.” He says with a laugh. “Drink more orange juice.” Is all he says before hanging up.

masterlist here // more bully!eddie here thanks for reading!

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[gabessquishytum]

the high school ask fucking SPOKE to me (https://www.tumblr.com/gabessquishytum/748116722128715776/hob-was-proudly-the-school-slut-before-he-and) mostly because there’s something so sad but also sweet about the idea of all these people trying to shame Hob for his previous promiscuous ways and him being so nervous about Dream dumping him for it, but Dream just being like “?? We weren’t together at the time, so as long as it was safe and consensual why would I care? I trust you to be loyal to me now because you said you would be, why would your past affect that?” And anyone who comes to Dream about Hob’s sexual past with the intent of trying to make him think less of Hob gets Dream’s fist in their face instead. Hob didn’t realize how much he wanted someone to stand up for him until Dream does and it heals something he didn’t even know was cracked.

(Also cue Hob “we’ll mark me down as emotional and horny”)

-🦇

You're so right! It really is very sweet (and Dream is totally in the right for being reasonable about Hob’s past and defending him in the present).

Like imagine if Hob’s promiscuity was actually his way of coping with stress, or maybe some other undiagnosed issues? Hypersexuality is something that's almost never spoken about but it can be a reaction to trauma, a way of exerting some control. Maybe on one level Hob really does love sex, but he's also using it to just cope with his life. He's absolutely not ashamed of what he used to do, but he recognises that it wasn't super healthy. He's at peace with all that. But being shamed and bullied for it really doesn't help, and sometimes he starts to worry that Dream does think less of him.

So it's a relief when Dream completely ices out anyone who talks about Hob is a derisive way. Dream can take down the gossips and the bullies so quickly, it's almost scary. A few barbed words or even a well timed slap, quickly teach a lesson to anyone who wants to make snide remarks. Dream trusts Hob with his heart and he's not about to let anyone cast doubt over that.

And yes, Hob always really did love sex, but he loves it now on a different level. He loves sneaking off with Dream to just tangle up together in each other's arms, no rushing, no expectations, just the love they have for each other expressed in physical form. In many ways Hob is hornier than ever, but it's all just for Dream. He's happy to be Dream’s slut (and yes, he would like to hear Dream call him that affectionately some day, because he's pretty sure it will fix him). He'd be equally happy just holding hands and falling asleep together. As long as Dream wants him? He'll be right there.

[writerlyhabits]

First Date

Pairing: tfatws Bucky Barnes x Single Mom! Reader

Ch. 2 of Blue is For Ben series | Masterlist | Ch. 1 | Ch. 3

Word count: 6.0k

Summary: Bucky wants to ask you out on a real first date, but what does that look like when you don’t have anyone to watch your son? 

Warnings: mild language, mentions of previous assholes reader has dated, more kide related media and games, I think that’s all it’s pretty cute

AN: Okay… I know this took forever to get out, but I started writing one idea that takes place after this and had a hard time transitioning, so I started over and wrote this chapter instead 😂 If you’re waiting for something a little spicier, stay tuned, I promise it’s coming 😉 Thanks @deceiverofgodss for helping me through this, ily 💙

“NO! It’s gonna fall!” Your son screeched from the living room. And as you continued to chop up your taco meat in the pan, you heard a heavy thump on the ground and an excited giggle from the four-year-old. 

Sometimes it was hard to believe that there was a hundred-year difference between the two of them. Ben’s developing motor skills and small size gave him a slight disadvantage as he played his favorite Bluey game, and Bucky was far too invested in how high he could get their high score. Keepy Uppy experts, they called themselves, smacking a balloon this way and that trying to keep it off of the floor. 

You weren’t sure your downstairs neighbors would be as excited about it as they were. But it was beyond adorable, and you didn’t have the heart to make them stop. 

It hadn’t taken long for Bucky Barnes to find a place for himself in your lives, and it had been far easier to get him through your door since that first night he came over for dinner. It started with dinners here and there until he was almost expected at the table each night. Ben wanting to show off his school projects had turned into after-school play dates, which then became a demanding four-year-old and a super soldier on call, ready to be at your doorstep in a moment's notice. 

One of those first few afternoons you had half a mind to apologize, to tell him he was allowed to tell Ben ‘no’ and do his own thing. But he walked in with a sweet smile and soft touches, greeting Ben with equal enthusiasm. Before you could even get it out, Bucky made sure you knew that he was exactly where he wanted to be. 

When it was just the two of you, Ben would often tell you that Bucky was his best friend. And after you put him to bed, you felt like a schoolgirl with a crush when Bucky’s nightly text messages came in. “Bedtime went okay?” translated to it’s my turn to talk to you, which never failed to bring a giddy smile to your face. 

“MAMA!” You snapped your head up in Ben’s direction, seeing the blue balloon floating across the counter that divided your kitchen and your living room. Glancing at Bucky, he gave you a wink as his eyes danced between you and the balloon. 

With both boys looking at you with anticipation, how could you deny them?

Resting your spatula against the pan, you scurried to the counter and got up on your toes, leaning across it to smack the balloon back into the living room where Ben bounced over to it. You watched them for a few moments, smiling to yourself as you watched the brick wall of a man play so sweetly with Ben, complete with goofy faces and exaggerated movements just to make him laugh. 

That shouldn’t have been all it took to make you absolutely head over heels for him. And yet you had to physically make yourself look away and focus on cooking dinner to avoid watching him with heart eyes. Logically, watching a man play well with your four-year-old shouldn’t have been the root of your affections… but it was kind of hard for it to be anything else when Ben was always with you. 

“Hey, we kept it up twenty-four times, that’s pretty good!” Bucky reasoned from the living room, alerting you to the fact that their game of Keepy Uppy had ended. 

“Let’s do it again! We’ll really beat the high score this time,” Ben said enthusiastically, and Bucky gave a deep chuckle. 

“How about you start this round without me? See how far you can get by yourself, okay? I’ll be back in a sec,” he reasoned, leaving the four-year-old to count to himself. 

Before you could process that he was coming to see you, one of Bucky’s large hands smoothed over the middle of your back. Your body instinctively leaned into his touch, and you tried to cover it up by turning to meet his gaze, finding him leaning against the counter beside you with a cocked brow. 

“Hey sugar, come here often?” He teased, but it still brought a sheepish smile to your face as his deep voice lilted in all the right places. 

“Only every day of my life,” you retorted, a boyish grin appearing on his face. 

“Can I help you with anything?” He asked gently. 

“I mean… you could stir the beans if you want. I thought you were playing with Ben?” 

“And now I’m talking to you,” he winked at you, removing his hand from your back so he could tend to the other pot simmering on the stove. You tried to ignore how much you missed the feeling. “He’ll be fine, I’ll go back out there in a few minutes.”

“Mmm, okay… so what do you want?” You shot playfully, and he gave you a confused look. “I’m smarter than that, James. You have a question you want me to answer.” He looked like a deer caught in the headlights. 

“I- well, not because I don’t want to spend time with you,” he quickly defended himself, and you couldn’t help the laugh that bubbled out of you. “It’s- c’mon, we were playing keepy uppy, you can’t expect me to turn that down,” he argued, now laughing with you. 

“But you do have a question for me?” He nodded in defeat. 

“I was just wondering… Do you have someone you trust to watch Ben?” 

Oh. 

That question. 

The one that, with men you had entertained in the past, had meant they were done playing family man, that they wanted Ben to be someone else’s problem so they could get you alone. It was always pitched to you like it was some kind of fantasy of yours, like they were doing you this big favor by giving you a reason not to be Mom. As if that was ever something you wanted to escape. 

It usually meant the end of whatever short-lived flirtationship you had allowed. They would show their true colors, turning into ugly versions of themselves when denied what they were really after. Your walls would go back up, you would keep your baby close to your chest, and you would never hear from them again. 

But Bucky was nothing like any of those men. He couldn’t be farther from them. 

“I uh… No, I don’t,” you started shyly, not very good at hiding how his question had caught you off guard. But when you watched his expression shift, it was soft, and there was no leap to a defense. He was different. “I’ve been working from home since Ben was born, and I only went back to the office because he started going to school. Other than friends here and there…” You shrugged and gave a quiet shake of your head. “Why do you ask?”

“Well…” he started, taking a deep breath before he looked back at you, still effortlessly reducing you to a puddle with one look despite his evident nerves. “I was thinking of asking you out on a date.” 

It was annoying what that one sentence did to you. 

“Figured I’d do this right, take you out to dinner and make it a real first date. Just for one night.” 

Just for one night… you’d never heard that one before. 

“I can.” What were you saying? “I can find someone. Just for a few hours, right? I’m sure there are a few sitters in the building. I can make it work.” 

What were you saying? 

It burned coming up out of your throat. Sure, Ben was four years old, he was plenty old enough to be left under someone else’s supervision. But he was all you had. And it’s not like you required much from a potential sitter, keeping him safe and happy was all you really cared about. But it was so hard to let go of him, and far easier to just reschedule things for another time. Now you were agreeing to hand your baby away because a pair of pretty blue eyes said he wanted to treat you to a night out. 

And you wanted it. 

Before you could take it back, even before the rush of mom guilt started to flood in, Bucky was already swooping in to rescue you from your spiraling thoughts.

“Hang on, don’t go pawning him off on someone you don’t trust, you’re gonna stress me out,” he assured you, his hands coming up to rub the sides of your arms soothingly, his face completely serious. “I just wanted to know if you already had someone, not for you to go find one.” 

The relief that flooded your body was more satisfying than you could have ever imagined. And somehow there was still room to be disappointed in what you lost. The idea of sitting at a table in a nice restaurant and being able to talk, really talk without the fear of what little ears could hear… 

With Bucky, it sounded wonderful. 

“I still want to take you out on a date,” he told you, bringing you out of your thoughts as if he could read them. You smiled sheepishly and shook your head. 

“And how do you think that’s gonna work, Buck?” You laughed, amused by the image of you and Bucky in a fancy dining room joined by a booster seat and a plate of chicken nuggets. “Just give me a little time to conduct interviews like a neurotic mom, I’ll find someone he’ll be okay with.”

“Nah, we’ll take him with us,” He grinned, patting your arms before he pushed off of the counter to peek out into the living room. “Psst…. Ben… c’mere.” You watched in intrigue as your son quickly abandoned the balloon he was tossing into the air to toddle over to the super soldier, launching himself into Bucky’s arms as the tall man kneeled down.  

“What do you think about me taking you and your mom to the park on Saturday?” he offered, and your son immediately lit up. 

“Is today Saturday?” You and Bucky shared a look. 

“No buddy, today is Thursday. Saturday is on the weekend when you don’t go to school.” Ben contemplated this for a moment before he replied. 

“Why?” He asked, his arms still wrapped around Bucky’s shoulders. You couldn’t help but giggle, watching Bucky try not to laugh as he recalibrated, Ben’s responses clearly not having matched the idea in his head. 

“Well… so we can all spend some time together. We’ll go get hot dogs, and I’ll take you guys to the park. And maybe I’ll treat you guys to…” Bucky hesitated, taking a quick glance at you as he considered his next words. “Maybe I’ll get us a treat afterward. How’s that sound?” 

“Good!” Ben said enthusiastically, already starting to climb around the super soldier like a jungle gym. “Bucky?” 

“Yeah, buddy?” 

“Can tomorrow be Saturday?” Bucky’s face softened as he helped Ben climb up around his back. Seeing Ben so excited, you couldn’t help your own heart melting a little bit. You could compromise. 

“Ben, honey,” you started, and Ben’s face appeared under Bucky’s bicep as he hung off of the outstretched vibranium arm like a monkey. “Why don’t you ask Bucky if he wants to go tomorrow after school?” 

You watched him struggle to climb around Bucky’s arm, the human playground as patient as ever while he watched – and helped – in amusement. And he scrunched his nose when Ben put his mouth to Bucky’s ear, much better at keeping himself from flinching away from Ben’s ticklish whispers than you were. 

And then Bucky effortlessly grabbed the child and twisted him around, giggling the whole way, to whisper his response in Ben’s ear. When he backed away, the two boys shared a look, nodding in agreement. Thick as thieves… Bucky nodded his head towards you, getting Ben to finally loop you into the plan. 

“Bucky sayed yes! He sayed it’s a date,” he relayed excitedly, and then did his best to wink with only one of his eyes. He almost had it, too. 

“Then tomorrow it is,” you said sweetly, and this time Bucky was the one shooting you a wink as he got up from his knees. 

“Keepy Uppy! Come on, let’s go!” Ben pleaded, no longer interested in dragging on these grown-up details, and pulling on Bucky’s hand with all his strength. Which, of course, didn’t make a difference. 

“Hold on, kiddo, let me finish talking to your Mama,” he laughed, and Ben groaned as he returned to the living room to play by himself. You kept yourself propped up against the counter as Bucky approached you, confident that your weakened knees needed another moment to be able to support you. 

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to rush you into anything,” you smiled, and he shook his head. 

“I’ve been trying to figure out how to ask you out for an embarrassingly long amount of time, tomorrow is perfect” he offered, and you felt heat rush to your cheeks. “I’m just glad he’s so excited.” 

“Me too,” you sighed, glancing back out into the living room to see your son laid out on the edge of the couch as he tossed his balloon into the air. “So, what treat did you change your mind about?” You asked with a grin. 

“It wasn’t so much that I changed my mind? I just didn’t think promising him ice cream ahead of time would end up working in our favor,” he explained with an exasperated expression, pulling a belly laugh out of you. 

He was different. 

…

“Alright I’ve got one,” Bucky offered from his spot on the wooden bench next to you, the two of you sitting on the perimeter of the park taking turns scooping bites from the rest of Ben’s cup of chocolate ice cream, which he’d ditched to play cafe with the other children and bring you the occasional fake ice cream. 

“Oh this should be good,” you teased, handing him the small cup as you finished your bite. After having gotten hot dogs and walked around the city, you had already crossed off the usual first date topics and found yourselves in this sort of game of twenty questions. The main difference is that you were trying to take advantage of your time without little ears. Well, not being in an enclosed space with little ears. 

“What’s the worst date you’ve ever been on?” he asked, and you contemplated your answer as you watched him scoop out his last bite – he could finish it off in one spoonful easily, but he only took half before he handed it back to you. 

“Okay, this one wasn’t exactly terrible, but just weird,” you started, and Bucky chuckled as you finished off the sweet treat and prepared to tell the story. “This guy took me out to eat at a hole-in-the-wall pizza place. Literally, it was just a window on the side of the tiniest building I’ve ever seen. 

“We end up sitting to eat it in a park close by, and I start to think that the date can finally start. But then I look over and see him picking all his toppings off.” Bucky scrunched his nose, making you laugh as you kept explaining. “After he’d polished those off, he started peeling the cheese off too, just eating it in chunks.”

“And then he just ate the whole soggy crust by itself?” he asked incredulously. When you nodded, he closed his eyes and dropped his head into one of his hands, rubbing his face in what could only be described as despair. 

“I lasted about halfway through the crust before I threw etiquette out the window, and asked him what the hell he was doing to that poor piece of pizza. He just laughed and told me he’d been eating it that way since he was a kid.” 

“Please tell me you got up and left immediately,” he groaned, pulling a deep belly laugh from you as you watched him struggle to process your story. 

You could have said that. That would be the normal thing to answer with, especially when talking about a different man on a first date. 

“That uh… that was actually Ben’s dad.” 

Or just put it all out there. That’s… that’s what you did. Way to make it awkward. 

You weren’t sure what kind of response you were expecting, but it certainly wasn’t for him to look at you with his brows raised as if he’d just come to some profound discovery rather than irritation, or even surprise. 

“So that’s why Ben eats pizza like that…” 

“Like a weirdo? Apparently,” you finished, and Bucky chuckled to himself as he looked back out at the playground to check on the boy in question, and you admired his features as he did. “He’s never met that man in his life, but I guess pizza preferences are genetic. He just came out of the womb ready to confuse anyone who has to see him tear into a pepperoni pizza.” 

“I’ve told you I’m from Brooklyn, right? New York?” He piped up, and you scrunched your face up in sympathy.

“I’m so sorry,” you laughed, an amused grin dancing on his face. “It probably drives you crazy, doesn’t it?” 

“A little bit of me dies inside each time I watch him do it,” he deadpanned, only encouraging more of your laughter. “You should let me teach him how to eat it like a New Yorker.” 

“Oh yeah? And which way is that?” 

“You fold it! Down at the crust, that way you can eat it with one hand and keep walking,” he explained very passionately. Part of you wondered if he was exaggerating a little bit – his New York was a few decades behind the trends – but that was exactly how you’d seen him manhandle his slices last week. 

“His hands are too small for that!” You reminded him, giggling when he looked offended. 

“So we teach him now. Fix it before it’s too late, and then when he’s older we won’t have to worry about him eating pizza like a psychopath.” 

The second the words left his lips, you felt realization hit him. 

There was still an amused grin on his face, but the implication behind his words still hung in the air, and you could tell he was weighing his options as he watched your face for any trace of a response to how many times he had said we, not to mention talk of still being around when Ben was a little older. 

“I- sorry, I know I just broke a lot of first date rules in a row,” he settled on, attempting to be humorous, so you played along. 

“Well, you fed my kid hot dogs and ice cream, and didn’t bat an eye when I brought up the baby daddy, so I think we can throw those rules out the window.” Bucky’s nose scrunched up as he let out a boyish giggle, his cheeks turning pink at your reminder, and you hoped that he couldn’t hear the way your heart sped up because of it. 

“Yeah? Just how many of those rules are we throwing out?” He asked smoothly, raising an eyebrow at you as he adjusted his spot on the bench, ending up just a little bit closer to you. 

“That depends on what you’re planning,” you retorted, unable to stop from giggling when he gave you a smug expression. 

Your innocent laughter was quick to fade when his tongue peeked out to lick his lips in a way that should not have had as much of an effect on you as it did, finding his baby blues darting down to your lips before returning your gaze. 

“You’ve got something, right here…” he husked, the arm that had been resting against the back of the park bench moving slyly to cup your cheek, his thumb brushing against the corner of your lips. 

“Hmmm really? Did I get ice cream on my face?” you managed as his face inched closer to yours, scanning your expression for any sign of rebuttal. Lucky for him, you were so giddy with anticipation that you may as well have had a green light on your forehead. 

“Mhm, you did,” he chuckled deeply, the gravel of his voice sending a shiver down your spine. “Let me get that for you…” 

“How kind of you,” you whispered, earning you a bright smile as the tip of his nose brushed against yours, your eyelids fluttering shut as you anticipated his next move. 

The moment Bucky’s lips met yours, you could have been easily convinced that the world around you had fallen away. You could count on one hand the number of times you’d been kissed like this in the last four years, but none of them even stood close. 

It was pure. Fucking. Bliss. 

His mouth molded onto yours like a puzzle piece, filling something inside of you that you hadn’t realized was empty, curing some secret ache in your soul. The hand cupping your cheek slipped to the back of your neck to hold you just that much closer, angling his face to kiss you again, keeping you close to him. He touched you as if you were a delicate thing to be treasured while he kissed you like you were the very thing keeping him alive. 

Bucky parted the kiss and held his lips away from yours by mere centimeters, an immediate wave of disappointment washing over you, wanting nothing more than for him to do it again. And again. And again. 

“What do you think, is this one of those rules we can ignore?” he murmured, a playful grin on his face as you caught your breath. 

“I think I’ll let it slide,” you teased right back, delighted by the huff of amusement you got from the muscular man in front of you, more than eager to let him lean back in to keep kissing you…

“MAMA!” 

Honestly, you should have seen it coming. 

Bucky’s lips had only just touched yours when Ben called for you from across the playground, and you could feel the super-soldier's wide grin spreading across his face as you scrunched your nose. 

You put on your best attentive mother face as you turned to look at your son, finding him attempting to run up to you through the wood chips of the playground, his eyes trained on the handful of leaves in his hands. 

“Yes baby?” you asked as he arrived right at your feet, finally looking up at you and Bucky. 

“I buyed you more ice cream!” Ben shoved his cupped hands up to your chin, waiting expectantly for you to relieve him of his delivery. 

“That was very sweet of you, Ben, thank you,” you sighed, doing your very best to keep the exasperation from your voice – Bucky’s chuckle telling you that you may not have succeeded – as you pretended to nibble on the leaves you’d been gifted. This was probably the fourth time you’d gone through his game of ice cream delivery, your date having received the other three. 

When you emptied his “bowl” by tossing his leaves to the side, just as you and Bucky had alternated doing for the past six handfuls, you assumed he would return back to the game of cafe so his new friends could “wash the dishes.” That was the pattern, that’s how the game was supposed to go. 

But if being a mom had taught you anything, it was that any assumption about your son’s next move would prove to be wrong. 

So of course, possibly the only time where you might have wanted him to keep playing his game and leave you to find your own entertainment on the park bench, he patted his hands on his pants and began climbing into your lap. Pushing limbs to the side, almost kicking Bucky in the abdomen, actually headbutting you in the abdomen… the whole nine yards. 

“What uh… what are you doin, bud?” you asked once he’d settled himself in the pocket of your crossed legs, grabbing for your arms as he wrapped them around him. 

“I jus’ wanted to snuggle you,” he shrugged, wiggling impossibly closer to you as he looked back out at the playground, perfectly content to watch the other children play as he sat with the two of you. You rolled your eyes for only Bucky to see, getting another laugh out of him as you squeezed your son tight. 

“Thank you, sweetheart, you know I love your cuddles,” you cooed, pressing a kiss into his soft hair. “You have awesome timing, did you know that? The absolute best.” Ben hummed in agreement to your not-so-subtle sarcasm, happy as could be while Bucky continued laughing. 

While you definitely would have enjoyed getting to kiss him just a little bit longer, getting cuddled by your son while Bucky tucked in close and wrapped an arm around your shoulders was a very close second. 

…

You shut the door to Ben’s room gently behind you, tip-toeing out into the living room where Bucky was waiting for you, leaning up against the arm of the couch with his hands resting gently in his lap. He raised his brows expectantly, silently asking how it went. 

You waved a hand across your face. “He’s out,” you whispered, making Bucky smile. 

“I thought he would be,” he said softly, nodding slowly. “I could tell he was so tired there at the end, he was getting goofy.” You laughed as you remembered Ben’s antics, climbing all over Bucky as he sat on the couch, doing anything he could to fight sleep, and laughing at just about anything that the super-soldier said to him whether it was meant to be comical or not. 

“You wore him out!” you reminded, moving closer to him as you recounted the evening. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen that boy run as fast as when you joined the kids’ game of chase.” He giggled as you stepped into the space between his legs, his hands instinctively lifting off of his lap to rest comfortably on your hips. “Earned yourself a couple points with the moms out there tonight.” 

“Oh yeah?” he asked sweetly, tilting his head in intrigue as you ran your hands up and down his muscular arms. Very muscular arms… You bit your lips and nodded to answer, earning a deep hum. “Did it earn me any points with Ben’s mom?” 

Your eyes found the chain of his dog tags hanging around his neck, tucked into the soft sweater that stretched over his chest. Buying yourself time to find the right words to answer his flirtatious question, you trailed your hands up his shoulders until they found the beaded chain. Slowly you pulled them out and kept them hooked in two of your fingers, the chain taught against his neck as you finally met his gaze. 

The blue of his eyes was slowly being overtaken by his pupils as he watched you. Not completely, but just enough to be noticeable, and it gave you a surge of confidence. You still had it. 

“You earned enough points to be able to kiss me again,” you bartered, and a single dark brow arched up his forehead as you leaned closer, pressing your body up against his. 

“How soon can I cash it in?” The gravel of his voice rumbled through his body, and you felt it go directly to your core. You gave a slight tug on the chain in your hands, clueing him into your answer. 

He didn’t need telling twice. Bucky followed the pull of his dog tags and leaned in to reconnect his lips with yours, and the second they hit home you melted into his grasp. You dropped the chain and wrapped your arms around his neck, putting most of your weight in his arms as his hands slid to wrap around your hips, holding you tight. 

It was hot, full of fire and hunger. He moved against you like it was second nature, tuned into every little sign and indicator your body was giving him, rendering you practically boneless. He nipped at your bottom lip, and teased your tongue with his own as you let him in, no thoughts in your head save from letting him keep kissing you like his life depended on it. 

Before you could wrap your brain around needing to stop for air, Bucky broke the kiss. His lips were so close, and yet so far, hovering inches away from yours. You spared a glance to see why he was torturing you like this, leaning back slightly to find his eyebrows furrowed as he stood completely still, peering out of his peripheral vision to follow… whatever it was he heard. 

After a few moments of silence, he relaxed again, turning his focus back to you and donning a sheepish grin when you raised your brows in question. “Sorry, I thought I heard Ben.” 

Ben… Ben, your son, sleeping in the other room. 

You didn’t even have the brain power to remember where you were, let alone keep your motherly instincts intact. Usually, it was you who had the all-hearing ears, being able to pick up on any slight out-of-place movement your son may have made. 

This time you didn’t. But Bucky did. While making out with you. 

“Are you even real?” You gushed, earning you a deep chuckle that rumbled through him, his nose scrunched up in amusement. “I mean, it’s enough of a task trying to find a man even willing to give a single mom the time of day. But here you are, buying him ice cream on our first date and listening for him mid-makeout.” His cheeks were turning a cute shade of pink as you rattled on with your praise, shaking his head through his amusement. 

“Well, I’m glad I’m doing something right, but that’s… I don’t feel like I deserve praise for that,” he admitted modestly, his tumb rubbing a soothing circle into you back as he continued to hold you close. “I actually feel like I should be apologizing for what I said earlier, when I went on about future things, and saying ‘we’ so many times… I- I hope I didn’t freak you out.”

The longer he kept talking, the more you were convinced you were dreaming. At any moment you would wake up, and this wonderful wonderful man would be ripped away from you. 

But when the dream didn’t end, you were quick to ease his worries. “Please don’t apologize for that, it was- okay, I don’t want to freak you out, but it was actually really refreshing.” 

Bucky tilted his head in question, gesturing for you to keep talking, and you took a moment to find the right words to explain what you were trying to tell him. Words that didn’t make it sound quite as pathetic as you always thought it did. 

“The guys I’ve dated in the past… well, I’ll just say that they were less concerned about finding a sitter specifically for the first date, and more interested in finding a way to get Ben out of the equation completely.” You had more to say, but for a moment all you could do was watch him. His face changed as soon as the words left your lips, and you were momentarily fascinated by the thinly veiled discomfort that took over his expression. 

Bucky was angry. 

Was it weird that it made your knees weak? His intense care for the both of you – as a complete unit – was making your insides do somersaults, and he wasn’t even seeking a reward for it. This wasn’t a show, he wasn’t trying to get on your good side. No, he was trying to hide it, play it off as something else. 

“I’d way rather hear you talk about a possible future, about teaching him things as he gets older… it’s a nice change from having to explain why Ben’s dad hasn’t come to take him away for the weekend,” you finished earnestly, watching the internal battle dance behind his eyes. “I like having you around all the time, watching you play together. You’re really good with him, Buck.” 

That last statement seemed to ease enough of his fiery emotions to give you a shy smile. “I try,” he shrugged. “He’s a sweet boy, it’s hard to tell him no.” 

“I know,” you groaned, earning you another laugh that rumbled through his large frame. “Y’know, he likes you a lot. He tells me all the time that you’re his best friend.” Bucky’s face melted into a soft smile, and it made you gooey. 

“As much as I like to hear that, I want better for him,” he started, sparing a glance towards Ben’s room, as if he was watching him through the walls. Only a mother wouldn’t think that was crazy. “He deserves a best friend his age, not a 107-year-old war veteran.” The bluntness of his statement made you laugh, the mental image of the two of them – and all their many differences – making for a comical image in your head. “Don’t get me wrong, he is my best friend, and I have no shame admitting it.” 

“Oh really? Not any of your superhero friends?” You started, but he made a scrunchy face in distaste, and you did your best not to erupt into more giggles. “And what about me?” He dropped the goofy expression and looked back at you with his eyebrow raised. 

“I was reserving something else for you…” he said smoothly, the timber of his voice sending another shiver through your body. 

“And what would that be?” you asked innocently, the arms still wrapped around his neck trying to encourage him to lean in closer. Instead, Bucky’s grip on you tightened as he rose from the arm of the couch, his darkening eyes never leaving yours as he walked you backwards through your apartment, keeping you balanced as you did your best to keep your feet on the ground. 

“Mmm, I think you’ll just have to wait and see,” he hummed, your back hitting the wall of your entry way as his eyes bore into yours. “I think I’ve hit my quota on future-talk tonight,” Bucky whispered. 

He didn’t give you time to come up with a witty reply before he leaned in close and pressed his lips against yours ever so softly, one arms slinking around your waist to pull you flush to him as his other left you, but you couldn’t dedicate any thought to where it might have gone when you were running your hands through his hair and enjoying the pleased sounds it drew out of him. 

It didn’t last long, Bucky breaking the kiss after only a few sweet kisses – not nearly enough, in your opinion – giving you a shit eating grin. He whispered a goodnight, stepping back to admire the flustered state he was leaving you in before walking back towards your front door, coat already in hand. And with one last wink he was gone, the door clicking softly as he shut it gently behind him, conscious of the sleeping four year old inside the apartment. 

You didn’t know how long you sat there, bracing yourself against the wall just inside your apartment as you went over the events of the night, remembering each sweet gaze, tender touch, and absolutely tantalizing kiss he had given you. One thing was for sure; it was without a doubt the most romantic date you had ever been on. 

You took a deep breath and pushed yourself off of the wall, moving to go double-check on Ben before starting your own nightly routine. You stopped in your tracks when your phone vibrated in your pocket, your face quickly breaking into a smile when Bucky’s name appeared on the screen. 

If we’re still throwing out first date rules, I don’t have to wait three days to text you again, right? Great, I’m glad you agree. 

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[nlxmoon]

( KIM TAEHYUNG, CIS MAN, 25, HE/HIM ) welcome to sunny los angeles, ALEXANDER “ALEX” PARK! we heard you’re quite ENERGETIC, but at the same time, you can be a little CHILDISH. i hope it doesn’t impact your job as a MUSICIAN too much. either way, kick your feet up! we’ll see you around town― especially at BOCA TACOS. 

hello!! i’m c and i’m so excited to bring u all my chaotic pop punk kid... pls give this a like if you’d like to plot, or don’t hesitate to hmu first on discord for such! ♡  

trigger warnings found: mention of pregnancy and miscarriage

PINTEREST || PLAYLIST || ABOUT SO IT GOES! || DISCOGRAPHY

BASICS

FULL NAME: Alexander Jacob Park

NICKNAMES: Alex, AJ

BIRTHDATE: July 28th, 1997

AGE: 25

ZODIAC SIGN: Leo

BIRTHPLACE: San Francisco, California

SEXUAL ORIENTATION: bisexual biromantic

GENDER & PRONOUNS: cis man, he/him

OCCUPATION: musician (frontman of So It Goes!)

MBTI: ESFP, the entertainer

ALIGNMENT: chaotic good

+POSITIVE TRAITS: confident, energetic, kind hearted, caring, charming

-NEGATIVE TRAITS: impulsive, reckless, childish, emotional, stubborn

BIO

Alex was born in San Francisco, California as the middle child of the Park-Kwon household. Two high school sweethearts that did nothing but provide the best they could for their kids: Alex lived a quiet, peaceful childhood, surrounded by love and support.

However... he also grew up becoming the “black sheep” of the family. His parents were respected doctors, and his siblings were book smart: Alex on the other hand... he was always getting in trouble, especially when his teenage years began. He was often found in detention, skipping classes, barely passing them. It’s safe to say that during this time, his relationship with his parents wasn’t as sweet as before.

While his siblings prepared to one day go to med school too... Alex had a very different passion: music. From a young age, he developed a love and interest for it. Asking for a guitar for Christmas when he just was 12 years old: after stumbling upon a Blink 182 video playing on tv, the moment his life changed forever when he found the solace he needed in pop punk music.

At 15 he started a pop punk band with his two childhood best friends that they called “So It Goes!”, his parents weren’t necessarily against his musical dreams: but they did have a hard time understanding them. Especially when no one in the family happened to be music inclined before. For as long as Alex can remember, he has always naturally stood from any crowd.. always the odd one out, but not necessarily in a bad way.  

Still: his parents were supportive, deep inside hoping Alex would eventually get his shit together and pursue a career in the medical field too (spoiler: that never happened lmao).

So It Goes! began to gain local popularity, eventually expanding to an online following too. Till being discovered and signed by a label during their senior year of high school, prompting for them to move to L.A after graduation to pursue their dreams and start working on their debut album: Gloom Boy Season, that was released in September 2016.  

Since debuting, So It Goes! become a favorite in the alternative/pop punk scene: having released 4 albums and 1 EP by now, and having toured around the world (also, a couple of Warped Tours on their bag). They aren’t My Chemical Romance or Green Day type of fame (yet)... but they have a core fanbase, and anyone who enjoys pop punk probably has heard their name before as one of the late 2010s bands to keep an eye on.

Oh yeah... I’m basing So It Goes! on one of my favorite bands aka Waterparks: in case you didn’t know who they were before, this is my time to shamelessly promo them and tell you to check out this banger for Alex’s band vibes.

ALSO CHECK OUT THIS POST FOR ALEX’S BAND (SO IT GOES!) ENTIRE DISCOGRAPHY!

If you were wondering about where his relationship with his parents stands now.. they’re okay now after he proved them that he Made It with his band and apparently “got his shit together” by it... they still don’t quite get him, but they love and support him which is what matters 😞  💓.

(tw pregnancy and miscarriage mention) Beginning 2018, Alex got into his purest and greatest relationship to date ( @scftglows​ ). Near their first anniversary, they found out she was expecting. They decided to keep the news to themselves and those closest to them until her belly was “noticeable enough” to tell the world: but unfortunately, Josie had a miscarriage during the first trimester. They tried to make the relationship work afterwards, but the pain was too much in the end, so they decided to call it quits instead in the summer of 2019: never revealing to the public the real reason behind the breakup.

Of course this caused Alex to spiral: first falling into a deep depression, then indulging in reckless behavior to try and numb the pain. Encouraged by his band mates to deal with it all in a “more healthy way”: he finally felt brave enough to go back into the studio and their saddest album to date (“Crying Over It All”) was released in late 2020. 

Putting himself back into the spotlight and touring again was pretty scary at first: but being near the fans again and feeling/seeing all their support ultimately ended up being pretty healing, motivating him to quickly go back into the studio and releasing an album early this year (“Lowkey As Hell”), with another tour coming during the spring and summer.

The past couple of years have been A Lot, so after So It Goes!’ summer tour ended: Alex finally decided he needed a little rest (something he didn’t really have ever since his band debuted in 2016), which is what he’s been doing ever since he got back home two months ago: just enjoying and cherishing all this free time to take care of himself.

Though this moment of peace has been lowkey (highkey) disrupted now, after his label/management recently forced him to get into a PR relationship with band rival @nadinexluna​ in order to promote an upcoming summer festival the two will be headlining. (hoping you all brought your popcorn bc this will be Messy™) 

Three years later and thanks to all the love and support from his family, friends and fans (and tons of therapy): Alex is doing way better now. The whole thing it’s still a really painful topic he never talks about, but he finally managed to go back to being his old, goofy self again ♡ (a little bit more mature tho). 

PERSONALITY/HEADCANONS

Just your average Leo man™ who loves the attention. On a good day he’s too hyper for his own good: pretty impulsive so his energy is A Lot to deal with lmaoo (chaos for days). He can also come off as childish a lot of the times over the same thing, but he’s really kind hearted and would do anything for those he cares for... golden retriever energy. On a bad day: he just retreats from the world and doesn’t leave his apartment, since he tends to be pretty emotional and sometimes that gets the best of him.

Big comic book nerd! Marvel fanboy (his fave superhero of all time is Spiderman): has a huge funko pop collection, and he also loves to come up with his own characters and stories (another safe haven of his). He’s been able to use these skills for designing merch or the artwork for all of his band’s albums. One of his love languages is to gift lil comic books where his loved ones are the protagonists of the story.  

Has a six year old female cat named Sally (yes, after that one Blink 182 song) that he adopted after he moved to L.A.

Loved Sk8r Boi by Avril Lavigne (forever his #1 love) as a kid so much that he became The Sk8r Boi... though it’s been a while since he properly skated, but he’s getting back to it so catch him wounded often lmao.

All he ever wants in life is to be like Tom DeLonge someday /: (without quitting his own band... u get it). Gerard Way is also one of his heroes bc well... music and comics, duh.

Landed a Travis Barker feature for his latest album and will never get over it

A lil bit of a himbo ngl

A hopeless romantic, falls in love too easily and has a new crush every week, which has caused problems throughout his life especially when it’s a “no strings attached” relationship, since he always catches feelings in the end and when they are not reciprocated that’s when he gets hurt /:

Loves to dye his hair and used to change it for every era his band had, the timeline was this: blue, blonde, black, red... but now that he got back home and he’s taking a break, he went back to natural (dark brown). 

idk what else to add... but pls give us all the plots (some quick ideas: fans of his band, one night stands/former flings, a fwb -can go terribly wrong since he always catches feelings-, crushes -can be one sided from either side-, exes on bad terms bc he hurt them without rlly meaning to but it’s angsty and it all went terribly wrong and it’s been a while but it still hurts, an ex who hurt him and all the angsty songs are for them, fellow music/art friends, a muse, the possibilities are endless!!). if u made it to the end i thank u and salute u with a forehead kiss ♡  

[thebonemanwrites]

Happy Birthday Dude, Miss U Lots

I didn’t wish you happy birthday this year. I tried to so often, as it was the only time you’d ever respond with a thanks, and an apology for not texting me as often as you’d like, and another reminder that you are still too busy to text me, nonetheless. I’d respond with a sad emoji, a bratty text of “ur soooo mean!!!!” before I threw my phone across the bed. I meant it, too. You were so mean to me, teenage me, the high schooler you showed the stars, who had such a stupid crush on you, so stupid it made me want to gag over my piano as I wrote a song about your smile. Who knew I’d write two more about you by the time you lost the ears to listen?

I didn’t wish you happy birthday this year. It’s been years since a happy birthday mattered from me, or at least that’s how I felt, pouring letters and emoticon hearts down the drain and watching them swirl away into the great unknown, dissolved in groundwater. You had forgotten about me, abandoned me like some lovesick puppy in a cardboard box on the side of the road. And still, for all the good memories we had, I texted you “happy birthday” every year, hoping that one day you’d come back and pick me up. I missed you, strange and wild boy from outer space, always somewhere else, somewhere faraway, but would always come back to regale me in tales of where his mind had gone, then take my hand into the starry night as we’d get ice cream and steal furniture and stare at pretty girls and chat about their boobs. But you were always so sad on the rare occasions you would return to your body, and I always wondered why you seemed to hate being in it so much. I liked to think that you were an alien, and that you missed the feel of your old skin, that this human skin was too rough against your fingertips, and yet too delicate with how easily you tended to tear through it like crepe paper. 

I didn’t wish you happy birthday this year. We’ve grown apart, you and I. And when you tried to reach out to me on Facebook, I could hear the guilt of it all, hidden between your words, nestled in the spaces, hiding behind the dots of your i’s and cowering in the corners of your t’s. I was brutal to you, words spewing out like a glass of champagne to the face, and I could see them dripping down your chin. You tasted them, acrid on the tongue, bitter and burning, and still floated an apology back, an apology far more tender than I deserved. I get it. You were busy. You were in grad school by then. Time slips away from us all. Besides, I was just some lovesick kid you met in Mexico once. You didn’t need to even be talking to me. 

I wished you happy birthday over your casket the next year. It had been months since you moved into your new place by then. I got no reply. Figures. Being dead seemed more hectic than your master’s degree. I forgave you, but you were on thin ice, only because it seemed you weren’t replying to anyone else either. But I still craved the stories. My fingers itched, wanting to text you again, asking if it was cramped in there, asking if you ever got bored, or lonely, or hungry, or horny. It’s hard to meet anyone pretty when you’re underground, after all. Knowing you, I bet you would have broken out somehow to talk to the girl in the plot next to yours. I didn’t ask you these questions. I swallowed them down like pills, and just texted you a short and sweet “happy birthday dude. Miss u lots.”

I didn’t wish you happy birthday this year, because I don’t deserve to. We hadn’t spoken for years, despite apparently constantly telling stories about each other, telling wild and fantastic stories about that weird kid we each met in Mexico, the geeky one with clothes that were too big on them and an odd smile, the one who liked space and danced all night under the stars, smelling like ice cream and sushi. I don’t know if you’re the same person anymore, for I am most certainly not. How could I call you my friend then? What would be the point of an empty “happy birthday” to a kid with big ears I met on vacation, a kid who no longer exists? How could I call you my friend when our very last conversation was me berating you, belittling you, my consonants piercing into your rough skin with the rage of years of being ignored, of being pushed aside, of being fed meaningless little white lies of “we’ll talk soon, okay?” that I still finger through on my phone screen late at night, convincing myself in my sleep-deprived delirium that we just might? Did you know I’m friends with your best friend now? She’s shrewd and wise and wonderful and patient as a Catholic nun but only half as psychotic. She told me you were lonely. She told me you missed me. I think she’s a liar, and I’m waiting on you to prove me wrong. 

I didn’t wish you happy birthday this year, because I’m still waiting. 

[sadaveniren]

Now I wanna ask about your personal meetcute! Would you be willing to share? Have a nice rest of your day!

Lol sure!

We ran in the same-ish nerd/weeb circles in highschool. But our first time truly meeting he had just lost his virginity in our highschool’s basement. He was full on freaking out as he came to wait for his parents to pick him up so he sat down across from me on the front steps and said “I just lost my virginity, distract me”

I proceeded to ramble on about all the facts of hormonal birth control I knew and how it’s not just used to prevent pregnancy but has a wide variety of uses outside of that which makes it a very useful and versatile medication that shouldn’t be demonized (I began my radicalization of him early)

And thus began our friendship 😂

[depressedgothgrl]

party fun

warnings: smut (p in v, unprotected sex, creampie)

summary: it started with a gas station, and ended in a bathroom with nate.

┍━━━━━━━☟━━━━━━━┑

you didn’t actually understand how you got in this position. it all started with you walking to this new years party. you had already been walking for a while ‘til you saw a gas station a few miles ahead, which was great since you had to pee. speeding up, you make it to the small gas station. after you pee, you go to grab a drink.

“[y/n]? is that you” the familiar voice calls out. your heart drops. you immediately knew who called for you. turning to the voice, you finally find the confidence to respond. “hello, jacobs.” you tried avoiding him throughout all high school. especially when the rumors of him hurting maddy came out. and when the rumors were “proven false”, you still tried to avoid him just in case. you had a small crush on him a while back, so seeing him alone right now was a bit uncomfortable and awkward. nate smiles a little at the name “what’re you doing here all alone?” he questions, tilting his head to the side a little with curiosity. “i’m walking to a party, because i don’t want to drink and drive.” he nods and continues to stare at you. this started to worry you a little. “i-is there something on my face or something?” you quickly ask him. he laughs and shakes his head. “no, you just look really good tonight.”

“oh, t-thank you!” you you start to blush, looking down to hide the slight smile on your face from the compliment. he knew what he was doing, he wanted to make you flustered. he had his eyes on you for a while. if it wasn’t maddy, it was you. he knew that you liked him in the past, your friend mckay accidentally told him. and now that maddy & him broke up, he can actually take action about it. “hey, i’ll but you what you wanted and give you a ride there. only if you want.” nate says, stepping closer to you and looking into your soul. “well, since you offered..” you say, going to grab a water and handing it to him. “this all?” he asks before going to grab a six pack of beer. you simply nod and look at your sneakers. you never wore heels, since it didn’t fit your type of style. you were wearing a black dress with white sneakers & left your hair down.

nate didn’t understand how on earth he felt this way, but he needed you. desired you. he wanted to touch every sweet spot on your body. you were against a lot of things in his list of likes and dislikes. you hung out with boys and girls, talked like a guy sometimes, had body hair, & wore whatever you wanted. you were insecure obviously, but at the same time you never gave a shit what anyone said about you living your life the way you wanted. and that might be the thing pulling nate in like a magnet. the fact you do what you want no matter the consequence made nate need you in his life.

“hey you can wait in the car if you’d like.” nate offers, to which you agreed to and started walking outside. once nate came to his car, he started the engine and began to drive. when you grabbed your water you noticed there was an awkward silence in the car, and nate noticed too. so to break the ice, nate starts a conversation. “so how are you? we never talk so i thought i should ask.” you turn to him to see him looking at the road. “i’ve been.. well.. living” you responded back. he slightly chuckled and nodded, “yeah i can relate.” you could feel the tension swimming around in the car. but you weren’t going to say anything or act on it. “want a beer?” nate offers, and you accept. while he had one hand on the wheel, he used the other to grab the glass bottle. he cracks it open for you and hands it to you. you take a couple of sips and enjoy the ride as nate turns up the radio. a few seconds later you feel the car go faster. you turn to nate who’s drinking a beer and staring at you. he starts speeding up more and you just smile quickly and drink your drink to distract you from looking at the speed rise by the second. your breathing starts to speed up aswell as you grip the car. part of you wanted to ask him what he was doing, but the other part was too scared to even move a muscle. you look at nate and then the speed reaching 100 mph. you tried to hide it but there was so much fear in your eyes. suddenly the car jerks and goes slower and your beer spilled all over you.

“jesus fucking christ” you shout grabbing the bottle and trying to clean up the mess made. nate simply starts to laugh while you laugh in relief that you guys didn’t crash. “you’re nuts nate” you huff out while unbuckling your seatbelt. he continues to laugh and shake his head as you look for napkins to fix yourself. once you did get a napkin and do what you had to, you looked at nate, who was staring right at you. now its getting real. his eyes were dark, and his stare was burning holes into your skin. the both of you feel the tension. its so thick you can cut it with a knife. resist it [y/n], resist. you told yourself but yet you didn’t listen. before you knew it, you guys were at the party. the car parked and you guys got out the car in a hurry. nate grabs your hand and then speed walks inside. “hey, wheres the bathroom” nate asks a random person at the party. they point to an area and he muttered a thanks before pulling you with him to the bathroom.

once you got to the bathroom, he shut the door and pushed you against it. he hungrily kisses you, and you kiss him back immediately. his hands explored your body as you guys make out. he grabs the straps of your dress and pulls it halfway down. breaking the kiss, nate makes his way to your breasts, gripping them while putting one in his mouth. you whimper as he toys with your nipples with his hands and mouth. the sound of your whimpers drove nate insane, and he grew impatient. he stops playing with your tits and begins to pull his pants & boxers down. he didn’t hesitate to rub his dick on your throbbing cunt. you let out a breathy moan, letting your head fall backwards. nate was about to put it in before you stopped him. “hm? what’s wrong?” he asks, scanning your face to find the issue. “nate, i’m a virgin.” you confess, letting the embarrassment eat you alive, causing your cheeks to get flushed.

this made nate very happy. why? because he loved having someone or something to possess. to own. to him, this means you trust him so much you’ll do anything for him. when nate lost maddy, he lost the one thing that mainly filled his possessive void. so he felt like this was a second chance. “i’ll start gentle, okay?” he looked into your eyes with care and sincerity. this made you feel safe. you nod softly and prepared yourself. you looked down and saw how huge he was. nate slid his tip into you, and you hold your breath, grabbing onto his arms. he pushed himself in deeper, getting more and more turned on the more you’d whimper. he gave you seconds to adjust, and once you gave him the green light, he started moving in and out of you a little faster. you moaned loudly as he went deeper, stretching you out with every inch of his cock. nate looked at you as he fucked you against the bathroom door, causing him to groan in pleasure. he observed every small thing about you, the way your eyes rolled back the harder he thrusted into you, the way you bit your lip to stop the pornographic moans slip. he loved every single second if it. while he goes to kiss your neck, nate’s hands roam your body. one gripping your tit, & one making figure eights around your clit. you clench and moan, causing nate to groan in response. “you’re so fucking tight, [y/n]” he grunts & pants.

you look at nate just to see him staring right back at you. he grabs your one leg and wraps it around his waste, giving him easier access to go deeper into your cunt. you as nate pounds into you like a sex doll, someone starts banging on the door. the both of you ignore it, too deep into this euphoric experience. the person on the other side of the door continued to bang on the door. “i’m using the fucking bathroom!!” nate exclaims, still fucking you senseless. a feminine voice responds, “nate?”. you gasp loudly and your eyes widen. you knew who the voice belonged to. it was maddy. nate put his hand on your mouth, to prevent you from making a noise. you expected him to pull out and shoo maddy away, but his movements didn’t stop. he goes closer to your ear and says, “don’t make any noise, and we won’t get caught. i’m not stopping til you cum.” if it weren’t for maddy behind the door, you would’ve got lost in the raspiness in nate’s voice. “hurry the fuck up nate i have to pee!” maddy shouts and continues to bang on the door. “jump up a little, i want both legs around me. now.” nate mumbles in your ear again as he removes his hand from your mouth. you follow instructions, and when you jumped, you were slammed back into the door, making a loud banging noise. you begin to panic as maddy bangs on the door back.

“what the fuck are you doing, nate? hurry up.” maddy shouts, pounding her fist on the door. nate simply ignores her and fucks you with everything in him. your breathing begins to speed up, and your whimpers started to get louder. you wanted to warn him that you were close to your orgasm, but it was only replaced with high pitched moans. nate had no choice but to cover your mouth. he felt you clench repeatedly on his dick and it only brought him close to his orgasm too. nate puts one of your breasts in his mouth, sending you over the edge. with a loud, muffled moan against nate’s hand, you cum all over him. he loved the way you looked while you milked his cock, the way your nose scrunched, and the way you still whimpered against his palm. he continues to pound into your pussy until he came inside of you. he stayed deep inside for a couple of seconds before pulling out. so much was running through your mind as he pulls his pants up. maddy banged on the door, screaming for nate to come out. now you too had to find a way out without his ex seeing you.

[a/n] i feel super filthy & i dont even know if this is good- i’m going to sleep LMFAOO.

[jessikahathaway]

Dreaming of You - JJK M

Hello hello!

It's been a while. I apologize for that but I'm back with some serious smut does that make it better???

Anyways, here's a Kook crack fic because I am a simp for him.

Pairing: Jungkook X Reader (Jungkook X Reader)

Genre: Crack, Smut, Romance, Lil bit of Fluff

Warnings: *cracks knuckles* aight here we go. Smut Warnings: Oral, Female/Male Recieving, face fucking, throat fucking, cum swallowing, spit kink, daddy kink, name calling, degradation (Jungkook calls her dumb and stuff be she wants it I swear), unprotected sex (DON'T DO AS I WRITE pls), Creampie, lil aftercare, Jungkook is so in love, and so is reader pls save them.

Words: 8.9k

Rating: 18+

Summary: You and Jungkook had been dating a while, but you still hadn't. You know. Got jiggy with it. So this is a story, about how you resolved that problem.

These past five months of your life had been, eventful, to say the least. Hell, the past 8 months have been wilder still. Your boyfriend, Jungkook, is a former boytoy. Playboy, man whore, fuck bucket whatever you wanna call it, he was that. You were a little sheltered. Not like, amish sheltered, but sheltered, nonetheless. You weren’t a virgin by any means, but that's neither here nor there. Jungkook had been a notorious name around town. A server at the local diner, he was known to be flirtatious and entirely too handsome for his own good. And you? Well, you were a local high school counselor, helping the troubled youth of today.

More like: Helping teen drama queens and delinquents not kill each other on a day to day basis.

There was the odd time you did make a difference in some lives, but most of the time it was petty bullshit that could easily be solved by a little maturity. 

You two knew each other, it was a smaller town and most everyone knew everyone. You had graduated a year ahead of Jungkook but you both went to the community college together, although you knew each other and passed in the halls you knew he wasn’t a long term deal. He fucked a few times then ditched, that was his thing. He was notorious for running out of parties with different girls, it was what he did. 

You did your same old routine. School and work, funnily enough, at the same diner Jungkook still works at. But when you graduated college you realized home is where your heart lied. So you stayed. Grabbing a decent sized house near your grandparents that had raised you. And nabbing a new job that was infuriating yet rewarding.

Now, all you had to do was find a husband. According to your grandmother.

It’s not like she was forcing you, but she encouraged you to find a life partner, someone to share your home and life with. You know, real soft stuff.

But that’s when Jungkook had entered your life yet again.

In the form of a life saving event.

Very cliche shit.

You were drunk at a party on the beach and fell in the water, almost drowned but Jungkook saved your life. That’s when you two started to talk more. It wasn’t a big deal or anything like that.

Ahem.

Anyways.

Jungkook and you wound up dating-it totally wasn’t you drunkenly admitting you had feelings for him and then proceeding to throw up in his bathroom. No, that would be sloppy and unbecoming of a lady-you know what. It happened, and he somehow found it endearing enough to ask your frigid ass on a date.

At least that’s what your older brother Jin says. 

So, finally, you two have been dating for five months. It’s sweet and cute or whatever. 

But there’s one little problem.

You two haven’t fucked yet.

Not even like, a little bit.

Jungkook had said something about wanting to wait until you both were ready, and saying he wanted to do this right.

But for fucksake.

Five months? 

That’s a little long. At least you thought so. It was starting to make you feel as though you weren’t good enough. Now, before anyone thinks your worth is judged based on your sexual attraction to someone or something or however you play. You wrong, you’re worth much more. BUT. It hurt your pride. Just a little bit. 

You’d done the first kiss, an awkward little smooshing of lips between the two of you.

You’d made out of the hood of his car one night.

But everytime you go to take the next step?

“Not now babe, just wait a little longer.”

And you don’t want to pressure him, and you don’t want to go insane sexually... What else is a girl to do?

You’ve even done the classic going to bed in lingerie and wanting for him to come over, only for you to either fall asleep and him be too sweet to wake you or he winds up getting cold feet and not coming over at all.

It makes you a little sad, because you love Jungkook. You think about him when he’s gone. And how much you long for him to stay when he leaves in the mornings. Your sweet kisses that are shared on one of the many dates you do. You don’t just want to fuck Jungkook. You want to make love to him and all that hippie bullshit.

Okay, so you’re super soft for the guy.

He makes you want to be all smoochy and gross. 

There’s something about him though, that just makes your netherlands quiver, like some sex obsessed fiend. But you can’t help it. Jungkook is like a beautiful work of art, and you just want to tear into him like some fat piece of meat.

It’s all you could do to keep your hands off of him sometimes. 

The way he wears those fitted tops and just, ugh. He looks so damn good. But not only that, he has the personality of a fuckboy, flirtatious as a sinner and as sweet as honey. But his true personality. That’s what you love the most. A modest, nerdy guy who loved video games and banana milk. And, the cherry on top of it all. He loved you too.

You went out with a good friend of yours, Jimin, who was a former fuckboy himself. But was now married and had a boy on the way. To ask for his ‘sacred’ advice.

So, you were at the bar one night. 

That’s generally always a bad start.

Now, you’re drunk. 

Even worse off.

Thirdly, you’re listening to Jimin.

That is the fatal blow.

“Babes, listen to me,” he said, slightly buzzed from his cocktails.

“I’m listening o-sacred one,” you giggled.

“Good, cause my old ass is about to give you some good fucking advice,” he said, placing his hand on your shoulder.

“Less hear it,” you slurred.

“You need to be the prey in his eyes. You need to make him think that it’s all his idea. That you’re totally innocent in the things you’re gonna do. Like wear a short dress on your next date, or send a hot pic or something. Drop something and bend over in front of him to pick it up. Shake your ass a little harder to  Kayne for me, please. But that’s just a personal request, we'll discuss those terms later.”

“Prey in his eyes huh?”

“Exactly, find out what his kinks are, play into them,” he suggested.

“How?” you sat on the edge of your seat.

This is what desperation does to a person, folks.

“Like, maybe he’s a dom, maybe he’s a sub. Start there. Does he normally take control of things, or do you?” He asked. 

“He’s normally in control,” you said, thinking of his lustful kisses.

“Okay, so probably a dom then,” Jimin analyzed.

“How do I figure out more specific things though? Like things I can do to turn him on,” you ask.

“Well, see if a certain title gets a reaction from him. Like sir, master, daddy? Any of those?”

“Okay, what else?”

“Well, is he an ass or tits guy?”

“He’s an opportunist,” you answered.

Jimin laughed at your answer, before getting serious.

“Does he have a breeding kink? Cum kink? Am I getting warm?”

“I don’t know, it’s not like I’m out here yelling about ovulating or something,” you stammered.

“You should try that!” Jimin encouraged.

“Jimin I don’t know,” you said, suddenly getting self conscious.

“Hey bitch don’t you start negative talk that’s gonna sabotage all my efforts here,” he warned.

“Sorry sorry, I won’t. He loves me, I love him, game face is on,” you teased.

“Good, listen to me though. If that boy doesn’t last longer than a minute dump his ass.”

“That seems harsh,” you pondered.

“It’s not, especially not for someone his age,” Jimin stated.

“I won’t leave him because of something dumb like that Jimin,” you said, feeling oddly protective over something you had no idea of yet.

“Just, try different things. Life's too short not to fuck like bunnies while you can. I’m starting to get back pain if we go too long,” Jimin joked. At least, you hope he was joking.

“Okay, you’re right. I’m gonna go call him daddy and yell about ovulating,” you said firmly.

“That’s the spirit! Go!”

And you did. 

Go back home and pass the fuck out.

Listen, listen, listen.

You’re a notorious lightweight. 

But you had forgotten that Jungkook and you had planned a breakfast date that morning. So, when you hauled your ass out of bed you realized one: you had to puke. Two: you were late for your date. Three: Your period was four days early.

Scrambling to the shower you got in and turned the water up entirely too high making your head spin and fall out of the shower. Unfortunately, you had taken the towel bar down with you. Jungkook had his own key for your place now, so, naturally he let himself in. And when you fell, a cry came from your lips and a loud thud. Jungkook, ran in to find you on the floor, hungover and covered in towels. 

“Baby what happened?” he asked, rushing over and placing his hand on your head.

“Jungkook?” 

“What happened, did you fall?” he asked, looking at the running shower and your soaked body.

“Yeah,” you whimpered, Jungkook pulled you into his arms and patted your head to look for any sore spots.

“Do we need to go to the doctor?”

“No, I’m okay,” you whispered.

“Did you go out with Jimin last night?”

“Yes,” you said, wiping the water off your face.

“Sweetheart you drank way too much,” he chuckled.

“No,” you lied, biting your lip, trying not to die of embarrassment.

“It’s okay, big baby,” Jungkook laughed.

“Thanks... daddy,” you said softly.

You felt the harsh floor hit your ass as Jungkook dropped you.

“Ouch!”

“Sorry Y/N!” Jungkook hastily apologized.

He helped you to bed and the topic never even came up. As if dropping you was a regular occurrence. You couldn’t help but be slightly bitter. You really wanted that to work, cause it might have been a kink of yours. Can’t win them all you guess.

You reconveened the meeting of the minds with Jimin over a facetime later that night long after Jungkook had gone home.

“So your dumb ass was too hungover to get a sensible thought to go through your head?” 

“Listen,” you started. “I may or may not have been hungover, but don’t call a bitch out. Rude as hell, however I called him daddy and he dropped my fucking ass.”

“That’s oddly poetic,” Jimin commented.

“Shut up, I still have a bruise,” you complained.

“Well, Daddy’s out for now, so. Try just, doing something scandalous. Show off some sideboob hell, this is serious!”

“I can do my best,” you said, looking down at your girls with motivation.

A few nights later, Jungkook came over for dinner and a movie. You picked just a mindless action flick, but it would no doubt enthrall him. 

You dressed a little skimpier than usual. A tighter dress to show off some of your cleavage, you had Jungkook entranced at the door. 

He was way more touchy tonight you noticed. 

Coming up behind you and kissing your neck gently.

“Smells good baby, whatcha cooking?” he asked, leaning his head over your shoulder as his arms came around your waist.

“Just some cheesy alfredo noodles, nothing too crazy,” you said with a grin.

“Ooh, fancy pants,” he said, landing a tap on your ass that was gentle but noticeable.

“Not really, but I’m glad you like it so far,” you said.

“May I kiss the chef?” Jungkook asked, leaning for the corner of your lips. 

“Please do,” you agreed, turning to connect your lips with his. 

“Mmm, baby,” he smiled as you wrapped your arms around his neck and pulled him in tighter. 

“Missed you so much these past three days.”

“Yeah? How much?” 

“So much, Jungkook,” you whispered, breath fanning over his lips.

“Me too,” he agreed before bringing his lips back to yours.

Your mouths melded together as he led your hips towards his.

“So sweet, what are you drinking?” he asked, licking his lips.

“Peach soju,” you smiled.

“Mmm tasty,” he said, moving to turn away from you. No doubt to go slam the rest of that peach soju.

You grabbed the belt loops of his pants and pulled his pelvis against yours. “Baby, don’t leave me yet,” you whined. Jungkook made a small growl in his chest as he devoured your lips this time, gripping at the back of your dress with his fingers. You mewled at the action, leaning forward to press your body against his harder.

Jungkook pulled back suddenly, causing your head to swirl with confusion.

“Just a second, I need to go use the bathroom,” he said, waddling down the hallway.

Your dazed mind believed him.

But when he did finally come back he was flushed, like he wasn’t feeling well.

“You okay Kook?”

“Yeah, just, felt a little off for a second,” he said, skin returning to its normal color as he calmed down it appeared.

“You were gone for a long time, are you sure you’re feeling okay?”

Jungkook’s cheeks got warm as he looked at you.

“Much better,” he said, patting your leg gently. You’re not entirely convinced, but he brings his lips to yours briefly. You kissed him gingerly, but he pulled back before much else could happen.

“Well dinner is ready,” you said, bringing the dishes to the table. Jungkook hurried to sit down, ready for your cooking. You smiled as you set his meal in front of him, moving to sit down as well.

“Babe it looks amazing,” Jungkook said, eyes wide.

“Thank you, it’s nothing special but it’s always a fail safe,” you explained.

“Well I’m excited,” Jungkook said, digging in.

“I’m glad baby,” you answered before grabbing your own fork and eating.

The meal passed relatively uneventfully. You asked about work. He said it was the same as usual.

“Is Mrs. Lebanskyi still trying to set you up with her granddaughter?” You giggled.

“No, I think after the fortieth no, I have a girlfriend, she finally got it. That and I may have put a rather disturbing image in her head just for good measure,” Jungkook laughed.

“Ooh, disturbing image. Do share, do share,” you said.

“Don’t you know that mysterious guys are more attractive?” Jungkook teased.

“Oh I bet,” you said, sipping your wine.

“Well, how's turf wars going?”

“Shelby is currently winning but Duke has been making some power moves lately,” you commented.

“Always liked that kid,” he said in reference to Duke. He was your troublemaker. But he had a great sense of humor.

The rest of dinner passed quietly. 

You and Jungkook both cleared the table, washing the dishes and settling down for a movie. Jungkook sat down on the couch, looking at his phone for a few minutes. 

Now it was time to initiate your newest plan.

“Hey babe, I’m gonna take a quick shower,” you said, moving towards your bedroom.

“Okay!” Jungkook said, head still in his phone.

“Be right back,” you stated.

“Kay,” he responded.

You got in the shower and washed yourself down. You shaved and put on Jungkook’s favorite lotion, then you forewent a bra, as well as putting some of your fancy panties on. Hopefully this next move would get those panties of yours to come off and get thrown towards some random corner of your bedroom. Or living room. Or kitchen. You weren’t picky at this moment.

So, you finally made it out to the living room, damp hair and shorts on. 

It’s time to put seduction plan number two into motion.

“Hey babe,” you said, sitting down and reaching over him to grab the remote.

That’s when you saw it.

Jungkook’s eyes were trained on your chest. You pretended not to notice, turning the movie on and settling into the couch with Jungkook. 

You sat with your arms crossed. Watching the action race across the screen. You stretched out your legs and had them draped over Jungkook’s lap. You watched the screen with tired eyes, when you felt Jungkook’s hand on your bare leg.

His eyes were still on the tv, but his hand was rubbing your leg slowly.

You tried to keep a neutral expression, but he was touching you... And his hands were so warm...

Jungkook turned to you for a moment, making your heart lurch into your throat for a second. Play it cool, play it cool.

You knew that Jungkook wasn’t stupid, but you weren’t sure if maybe this was pushing it a little too far. You could just do the adult thing and ask him if he wanted to have sex and why he hadn’t been more intimate with you but, where’s the story in that?

“You’re wearing that lotion I like,” he said, smiling.

“Well, you’re here so might as well spoil you a bit,” you said.

“I appreciate it,” Jungkook said, coming closer to bring your lips together.

“I was hoping you would,” you said, kissing him back gently.

Jungkook wrapped his arm around you, bringing your lips together sensually almost. The urge to rip your clothes off and have your way with him were strong in this one. But, you refrained. He has to think it’s his idea. His idea-oh god his lips are so soft, and plush beneath your own. Your mind almost went blank at the action of his hand coming up along your waist and pushing you onto your back.

Your lips parted as you stared up at Jungkook with pupils blown wide and breaths coming in short gasps. He looked at your eyes, then your lips as he connected your mouths again. You wrapped your arms around his neck and brought him closer. It wasn’t enough, you wanted him closer still.

Jungkook pulled away slowly, as if savoring your kiss.

“You’re so beautiful,” he smiled, brushing some of your hair out of your face.

“Thank you Jungkook,” you whispered, moving to capture his lips yet again when he put his hand on your shoulder.

“I think I’ve gotta get going, it’s almost eleven and I have to work in the morning,” he said, sounding just as disappointed as you felt.

“Okay Kook,” you said, sitting up to give him a hug.

That’s when you felt it.

A distinct prodding at your stomach.

You moved back to ask him about it when he placed a quick kiss on your lips, effectively dazing you before rushing towards the door.

“Bye babe! I love you!” he hollered, running out of the house and leaving you thoroughly confused and horny in your living room.

Soon after that even your work friends were starting to wonder if you were frustrated about something.

“Y/N, are you sure you’re alright? You haven’t touched your food,” Hoseok said, a good friend of yours who was the literature teacher. 

“Hobi, I’m gonna ask you something and you have to help me out. Jimin’s advice has failed me before and continues to do so to this day, but you-you’ve never led this lamb astray before, can I have some advice?”

“Of course, what’s the trouble?”

“My former playboy boyfriend won’t fuck me,” you said, covering your face in embarrassment.

Hoseok choked on his drink and looked around the office to make sure no one heard your debauched statement.

“Okay. Okay, rewind. Jungkook.”

“Yes.”

“Your sweet loveable boyfriend Jungkook.”

“Yeah.”

“Good communicator and flirtatious server Jungkook.”

“That’s the one.”

“Have you thought of, I don’t know, asking him?” Hoseok said, smacking you upside the head gently with a few papers.

“Hey,” you whined.

“You’re such an idiot sometimes,” he laughed.

“What do you mean?”

“Firstly, for going to Jimin for some kind of advice that’d only work in a romance novel.”

Oops.

“Secondly, for listening to any advice that came out of that idiot’s mouth,” he continued.

“This is feeling less like helping me and more like roasting me,” you complained.

“Partially because it is, but anyways. To the advice column of our paper,” Hoseok joked. “Well, talk to him and figure out what’s going on. Or if all else fails just show up to his house in a trench coat and lingerie, there’s only so many ways to seduce someone.”

--

Okay, you know this was a dumb idea.

But there wasn’t much else to do.

It’s the middle of the night, you’re standing outside of Jungkook’s apartment with a stupid peacoat on and your trusty pale pink babydoll. Your legs were freezing. You knocked on the door before you could think better of it and waited. Your heart was beating out of your chest. Eventually, a sleepy looking Jungkook answered the door. He looked at your attire and then up to your face.

“Babe,” he greeted.

“Hi Kook,” you said, biting down a shiver.

“It’s a little past midnight,” he said, looking at you with confusion.

“I know,” you answered.

Jungkook continued to stare at you before you couldn’t help the shiver that ran over you. Teeth chattering and body shaking, Jungkook’s eyes softened and he opened the door wider and urged you inside. Rushing into the living room you turned around to face Jungkook.

He was shirtless, a pair of joggers on and his phone in hand.

“We need to talk,” you said, looking at him with nothing but love and a little bit of lust because damn he looks so good-no! Damn it, try to focus Y/N.

“About what baby? It’s almost one in the morning,” he said, coming forward to take your hands.

“I don’t want to break up,” you said. Jungkook cocked his head to the side and pursed his lips.

“Okay-were you thinking that you did want to break up?”

“No! God no, not ever. I love you Kook,” you said, palming his cheek.

“Then why are you telling me you don’t want to break up? Are you drunk? Have you been out with Jimin,” he started to scold you, when you pulled him to your lips gently. He quieted down a little but pulled away nonetheless.

“Y/N, what is going on?” he asked.

“Jungkook, how long?”

“How long what?”

“How long are you going to make us wait?”

Jungkook’s eyes narrowed.

“What are you talking about, quit beating around the bush and just fucking tell me what-”

“Why won’t you fuck me?” you asked, blunter than you had intended.

Jungkook balked at you before he replied. “What?”

“Fucking, sex, making love whatever you wanna call it, why aren’t we doing it?”

“Baby-it’s one in the morning I don’t think this is the time or the place to have this conversation-”

“What conversation Jungkook? Are you just not attracted to me? Or is it someone else? Why?”

“Not attracted to you-Y/N, do you hear yourself?”

“My ears work fine,” you glared.

“Great, cause they’re about to get some use.”

You were going to argue some more, feeling rather defensive about the whole thing when Jungkook blocked your path.

“Not attracted to you huh? You think I haven’t noticed what you’ve been doing? Little fucking tease, that’s what you are. Calling me daddy, wearing no bra and those shorts as well as my favorite lotion. Now the trench coat-”

“It’s a peacoat,” you corrected.

“What the fuck ever, what I want...” he swallowed thickly. “What I want is underneath it anyways.”

“What do you want?” you asked.

“What I’ve always wanted from you,” he smiled. He approached and opened your peacoat, button by button.

Gently, he peeled back the coat and let it drop to the floor. Your lingerie decorated your body perfectly. But Jungkook didn’t even look at it. His head dipped as he came closer, your heart was in your throat. Was this actually working?? The fuck??

But, all you felt was Jungkook's lips right above your left breast.

“This is what I want,” he said against your skin.

“My boob?”

“Your heart you idiot.”

“Lot of harsh words being thrown around right now,” you sniffed. But even you could help the small smile that came to your lips as Jungkook backed up. Carefully, as not to scare him away, you lifted your hand to his chest and laid your hand over his heart. “This is what I want,” you repeated.

“My boob?” he joked.

“Yeah,” you teased, pushing him back a little. When he frowned you sighed and nodded your head. “I want your heart too babe, always.”

“You’re such a softie,” he smirked, coming forward to kiss your head.

“Yeah yeah, only for you babe, only for you,” you warned.

“That’s all I care about,” he smiled.

“You’re such a little shit sometimes,” you growled.

“Sorry,” he said, trying his best to look sheepish.

“God sometimes I wonder,” you said, laughing.

“Anyway babe, about the other thing,” Jungkook said, looking at you.

“Huh?”

“Have you forgotten that you’re literally standing in my house in lingerie and heels?” he asked, incredulous.

“Sorry, my bad,” you sighed. “Here hand me my jacket, I’ll get out of your hair so you can sleep,” you said.

“Wait babe-”

“No, I get it. This isn’t the time nor the place to discuss that, I shouldn’t have woken you up-”

“Babe if you walk out that door in that set and I don’t fuck you, I have done both of us a disservice.” 

It was your turn to look shocked. “What?”

“Babe, I admit I was holding out on you,” he said, rubbing the back of his neck. “I was used to being used, and people saw me as an object and not a person, but you changed all of that. You showed me what love is, how a relationship works. And I’m so grateful that you did. Because being with you is my greatest joy. Honestly. God I’m such a simp for you babe, for real. But-But with sex, I was worried that maybe all you wanted was that you’d slept with me exclusively. I know it’s dumb but I was insecure at first. Now-Now I’m ready to take that step with you, if you want.”

“Jungkook, don’t say something if you’re really not ready I’m being an idiot and-”

“Well you’re always being an idiot. But right now you’re onto something,” he encouraged.

“Okay, burn me, that’s fine. But, what do you mean I’m onto something?”

Jungkook groaned.

“Do you want me to spell it out? G-E-T I-N B-E-D-”

“Speak my language please,” you snarked.

“Get in my bedroom,” he said, walking and opening the doors to fucking heaven at this point.

“Are you serious?” you asked. 

“As a heart attack,” Jungkook responded.

“Holy shit-okay,” you said, walking towards the bedroom. Jungkook swatted your ass as you walked past him.

“Get on the bed, put your coat on the chair,” he said. You did as he asked, putting your jacket down and climbing onto the bed. You realized you still had your shoes on, moving to take them off you heard a snarl from the otherside of the room.

“Did I say to do anything else baby? Keep those heels on, it’ll be the only thing you wear when I’m fucking you,” Jungkook growled, walking towards you like a man starved.

Your heart wasn’t prepared for that statement, almost giving out at the last minute, before you could even suck his dick. What a shame, but a way to go nonetheless.

That’s when Jungkook’s hand gripped your jaw, not tight enough to hurt you, but enough to get your attention from your wayward thoughts. “Listen up babydoll, if you need to stop, say something. Make a safeword right now.”

“Uh-um, I’m really not good under pressure Kook-”

“I’m not fucking you until you think of one,” Jungkook said.

“Fine, fine. Uh-strawberry,” you answered.

“Alright, if you say strawberry at any point we’re done for the night okay? If you need me to slow down just say yellow, and if everything is okay tell me green,” he announced.

“Why couldn’t red be my safeword?”

“I just like to watch you struggle sometimes,” he smirked before bringing his lips to yours seductively.

You wrapped your arms around his neck and kissed him back fervently. Like this might be the last time you get to kiss this man in your life. Jungkook licked the seams of your lips, asking you to open your mouth for him. You did just that, opening your mouth and letting his slick tongue inside. You moaned when Jungkook wrapped his tongue around yours, showing you just a glimpse of the pleasure he could pull from your body.

“Baby,” you whined when he pulled back, mouth hanging open and chest heaving.

“I’m not your baby, sweet thing, no no. Call me Daddy,” he said, holding your head back so he could nip and suck on your neck.

“Wait, I thought you didn’t like that?” you asked, looking at him.

“What do you mean?” he questioned pulling away from you.

“You dropped me on my ass the last time I called you that,” you said, reminding him of your little experiment.

“Did you ever think that you shocked me by randomly calling me daddy outside of the bedroom?”

“Well, I mean I thought about it,” you sniffed.

“Clearly,” he snorted before pulling you back in, kissing you feverishly.

You whimpered into his kiss before wrapping your arms around his torso.

“Fuck, you’re so god damn sexy,” he groaned.

“You too Kook-”

“What did I say,” he snapped. “I’m not your baby, I’m not Kook, I’m your daddy. And you better start fucking acting like it before I punish you.”

His words sunk in and you nodded demurely.

“Yes Daddy, I’ll behave,” you said, biting your lip.

“You will huh? We’ll see about that,” he teased before pushing you down onto the bed, climbing on top of you and kissing your jawline, leaving wet kisses along your heated skin.

You moaned underneath him as he worked his mouth over your jaw and down to your chest.

“Such pretty tits baby,” he said, pulling them out of the lingerie. His eyes sparkled as he unwrapped his present like a kid on christmas. You arched into his touches, watching with rapt attention as he brought his mouth over your nipple. Your reaction was music to his ears.

“Fuck daddy,” you mewled, looking at him with stars in your eyes.

“Mmm, so sweet babydoll,” he said, laving his tongue over your breast salaciously. You moaned at the contact, shivering when he blew on the wet skin. He brought your hands up above your head, holding them there by the wrist. If you tried hard enough you could escape but you didn’t want to upset him, and a part of you didn’t want to escape him, you wanted all the pleasure and torture he could give you.

“Feels so good daddy,” you whined, rutting against him like a bitch in heat.

“Just playing with your tits and you’re already so responsive. Fuck I should’ve done this sooner,” he lamented, pulling your nipple into his mouth and sucking on it harshly.

Your cries were softened by the very torturous lips that were bringing you such pleasure. You struggled to keep yourself under control. You feared chasing him off originally, now you were afraid of the fucker teasing you to death.

“My beautiful doll,” he smiled, looking at you with adoration in his gaze. “Open your mouth.”

You didn’t question him, you just opened your mouth like you were told.

“Suck on these fingers, get them nice and wet so they can fuck you good,” he said, bringing his pointer and middle finger towards your mouth. You sucked his fingers lewdly, taking them so deep your lips hit his knuckles.

“That’s it, good girl,” he praised. “Now, you’re gonna take those panties off.”

You flushed, trying to keep your composure but-his voice was like pure sin. You couldn’t explain it better than that. You wanted to hear it more and more, you wanted him to talk to you like you were a dumb little bitch-which you weren’t (most of the time).

You weren’t sure if you were into that kind of degradation but, maybe, with Jungkook? Maybe you could see it as a thing.

“Jungkook?”

“How many times-”

“No-time out for a sec before we really get into this,” you said, wringing your hands together.

“What is it? Do you wanna stop?”

“No! No no, I’ll literally die if you don’t fuck me but-”

“This sounds like it’s going to be a boner killing conversation-”

“Bitch what did you just say to me?”

“What did you want to say babe, what’s wrong?” he asked, rubbing your thighs gently.

“Well. I was wondering... maybe we could do like... I don’t know-you call me mean names and stuff?”

“Like degradation?” he asked, raising a brow. “Consider my boner intrigued.”

“Yeah. Are you down for that?” you asked.

“I think that could be hot, but I don’t want you to feel bad about anything,” he said, biting his lip.

“Nah, I know that’s not what you actually think about me, no worries babe. But like, call me a dumb slut or something I don’t know,” you said lamely.

“Well then, I’ll call you a dumb slut and go from there,” he laughed. 

“No! I’m serious! I wanna be degraded,” you encouraged.

“Alright I hear you I hear you, but I can’t just whip it out and be like-dumb slut! That feels weird to me,” he shrugged.

“We’re supposed to be having sex right now but I had to open my big fucking mouth and ruin it-”

“I wonder why some people like degradation,” Jungkook pondered.

“This is getting us nowhere, nevermind just forget I said anything,” you sighed. 

“No babe, I wanna do this how we’re both gonna like it. Maybe we should talk more about it tomorrow, and just sleep tonight huh?”

“No! Please please please don’t just sleep on me, I’m literally ready to go, I swear,” you answered. “Please Daddy, please fuck me.”

“See I’m not in it anymore so it just feels weird to hear you say that-”

“Jungkook are we really not gonna have sex after all this?”

“I dunno. I’m kinda tired,” he yawned to emphasize his statement.

“I’ll suck your dick, please, I’ll do anything to feel you-call me a needy bitch or whatever cause it’s true I'm a needy bitch for your dick daddy please.”

Jungkook’s brows raised in interest. 

“You want it that bad huh?”

“Yes. I want it so bad please,” you begged.

“Alright baby, alright I’ll give you my cock. That’s what you want isn’t it? My big fat cock in that tiny pussy huh?”

“Yes,” you moaned, laying back into the pillows. 

“I bet you do you whore,” he growled. “You come here in the middle of the fucking night because you’re so hungry for dick. I bet you’d crawl on the floor if I asked you to, huh? I might just have you crawl for this dick.”

“I’ll do it daddy, I’ll crawl, I’ll grovel, I’ll do whatever you want just please daddy,” you begged. 

“Alright, I’m gonna fuck you dumb,” he snarled before coming forward to kiss you again. 

You accepted his kiss and let him dominate the passionate exchange before whining and rutting against him. You were a dumb slut who wanted his dick more than anything in the world right now.

“Please daddy, give me your cock. Wanna suck it like a good girl,” you said. 

“Aww my baby slut wants to suck my cock huh? Should I give it to you? Do you think you deserve it?”

“I don’t deserve it,” you whimpered. “I’ve been so bad, coming to daddy’s house so late and demanding his cock but if you let me, I’ll be so good for you.”

“Mmm, come here my baby,” he encouraged, moving you down so your body was flat but your head was propped up on a pillow. “Gonna fuck that dirty mouth of yours. Then I’m gonna cum and you’re gonna drink it like the good little bitch you are, and you’re gonna thank daddy for giving you such a reward when you’ve been nothing but a disobedient little shit.”

“Thank you daddy,” you said before opening your mouth up to him. Jungkook wound back and pulled his pants down. You kept your mouth open, waiting for him to give you what you wanted.

Finally, you gave a small whimper and Jungkook freed his cock from his underwear and your eyes bulged. His cock wasn’t like-pornstar huge-but it was pretty big, thick and ready for your wet mouth.

“Open up wider, daddy’s cock won’t fit otherwise,” he said, scooting forward so that he was straddling your face. 

“Fuck my throat daddy, I’ll be good,” you pleaded. 

“That’s a good girl,” he smirked. “Nice and easy.”

He slowly eased his cock inside your mouth, giving you a few seconds to get adjusted before pushing a little further. You bobbed your head forward as much as you could but Jungkook was also thrusting at the same time, making you cough a little as he hit the back of your throat. 

“Gag on it, yeah, fuck like that,” Jungkook moaned. “Love watching you struggle to take it all.”

You struggled to keep your throat relaxed as Jungkook thrusted forwards, fucking your mouth and throat. You whimpered under him. Jungkook was whispering the nastiest shit to you the whole time, effectively ruining your panties as you struggled to keep up with him.

“Fuck you are a nasty little bitch aren’t you? Fuck, love watching you suck my dick. I’m gonna fuck your throat raw baby, gonna fuck it so deep and hard then I’m gonna make it all better by cuming down your throat to soothe the ache. Aren’t I such a nice daddy baby? Even though you’ve been so bad? Fuck your mouth is so hot, I love it. I love you,” he moaned. 

You wanted to respond but you were rather preoccupied. 

Jungkook was brutal at certain points, making your head spin with the lack of oxygen. But he seemed to know your limits pretty well because just before you’d want him to let you breathe, you would feel him let up. Giving you some air. 

Jungkook’s groans turned to whines above you as he continued to fuck your throat.

“Gonna cum baby, gonna cum down your throat and make all that hurt go away. And then what does my special girl say huh? What do you say after that?”

You choked on his cock once more in lieu of a response and let him do whatever he wanted.

“Here it comes you dumb slut. Drink my cum,” he groaned, body tensing before he shuddered a few times and you felt the warmth of his cum go down your throat. You choked again and Jungkook brought his dick out of your throat and let you swallow the rest. 

You wheezed a few times, feeling the sweet air in your lungs. 

Jungkook took your jaw in his hands and kissed you senseless for a moment. Jungkook’s lips were swollen from him biting them and from your previous kisses. 

“Thank you daddy,” you croaked, kissing him again. 

“You’re so welcome,” he beamed. “How do you feel about spitting as a form of degradation?” he asked, raising a brow at you.

“Do it, please daddy,” you hiccuped, feeling the ache in your throat more. 

“Open your mouth,” he said, pulling back.

You did as he asked and he spat right in your mouth, causing you to rub your thighs together as he growled. 

“Now swallow.”

You did just that. 

“What a good dumb slut you are,” he groaned. “So perfect for me.”

“Just for you daddy, only for you.”

“That’s right,” he snapped. “You’re all for me. My perfect stupid whore.”

“Daddy... My pussy... Hurts,” you whimpered. 

“Yeah? Let me look, let daddy see where it hurts baby,” he said, pulling your legs apart slowly. 

The sight before him knocked the wind right out of his lungs. Your panties were stuck to your center. That's how wet you were for him. Fuck you looked so good, dripping and whining for him.

“I see the problem,” he said, biting his lips once more.

“What’s wrong daddy?”

“Need to eat your pussy baby, that way it won’t hurt anymore,” he said, placing an open mouth kiss to your core.

“Oh!” You gasped. 

“Take those panties off for me,” he demanded, looking just as impatient as you felt. 

You scrambled to get your underwear off, almost rolling off of his bed if it wasn’t for his gentle hands holding you. When you finally did get the blasted things off Jungkook’s mouth was quick to replace them. You moaned in surprise, but you quickly got a hold of yourself. 

“Fuck! Feels so good,” you mewled. 

“You taste even better,” he moaned into your wetness. He sucked on your clit lightly, causing your hips to buck and making his face smoosh into your cunt even more. You cried out at the feeling of his tongue moving against your sensitive center. 

“Daddy, oh god,” you hiccuped. 

“That’s right pretty, let it go for me, let me taste even more,” he said, licking and sucking on you like you were his last meal. The string in your tummy felt so tight like it could burst at any second. But fuck you just needed a little more. Just a smidge. 

“Daddy... C-Can I-oh fuck me, can I have your fingers please,” you asked, trying so hard to be good. 

“Being polite now huh? Now that I’m gonna make you cum? Well, I wanna see how tight this pussy is, wanna stretch you out before you get shoved onto my cock.”

You could feel the frustrated tears welling up in your eyes. You wanted it so bad and if he didn’t give it to you, you weren’t sure what was going to go down-oh...

“Fuck!” you screamed as Jungkook entered two fingers into you. Your walls clamped down on the intruders and Jungkook huffed into your center at the sensation.

“Shit you’re so tight baby,” he groaned, licking firmly at your clit as he struggled to keep his control.

“Daddy, m-my pussy, so full,” you hiccuped, feeling the tears finally start to trickle down your cheeks. 

“I bet it is, but you’re still gonna take this big cock. I promise it’ll feel so good baby. Hot and throbbing in your pretty pussy,” he said, not yet noticing that your cheeks were swelling from your salty tears. 

“Daddy,” you said, feeling yourself shaking as Jungkook began to thrust his fingers inside of you. 

“Fuck, gonna feel so good on my dick. You’re such a good girl, daddy’s good girl huh?” he said, like someone might say to a young pup. But here you were, eating it all up. Fuck, the tears wouldn’t stop. It was almost too much. But you didn’t want him to stop. Not yet. God not yet.

“Mngh, your fingers are so good,” you whispered, arm going over your eyes to help shield them from Jungkook’s heinous activities downstairs. 

Because if you kept looking you might pass out. 

You sniffled and felt Jungkook pause his fingers inside of you. 

“Are you crying baby?”

“N-No.” You swallowed to try and keep the shudders at bay but his fingers wickedly started up again.

“Hm, you aren’t? Well, let me take a look then,” he said.

“No!”

“Y/N, are you alright? Just move your arm,” he encouraged. 

“I-I can’t,” you said.

“Then let me help you,” Jungkook answered, moving your arms away from your face and pinning them to your sides. 

Jungkook was slightly blurry, your eyes now doubt slightly swollen and red from your tears. You weren’t sure why you were crying so much but you were certainly overwhelmed. 

“Do you want to stop?” he asked, wiping your tears away with his thumb.

“No Daddy, I don’t,” you said, looking him square in the eyes. 

“Alright,” Jungkook said, kissing up your throat, and onto your chin. Next, claiming your lips in a harsh exchange. But a sweet peck was placed right after to soothe the sting. Jungkook then kissed your cheek. You felt a wet sensation, and realized. He was licking you. More specifically-your tears. 

Holy shit.

Jeon Jungkook has a crying fetish. 

You wanted to laugh, but you were so turned on all you managed was a slight wheeze, which was interrupted by Jungkook’s plush mouth coming back to yours. 

Jungkook grabbed onto your lingerie and pulled it up and off, baring you fully to his hungry eyes. He looked at you like you were everything he’s ever wanted and more. Fuck, was this love? Is this what all those teen fanfiction authors are spurring on about?

Cause, if it is, they’re onto something. 

The tears poured down harder as Jungkook came back to you. 

“My baby, so emotional huh?” he whispered, biting on your ear gently. 

“I just love you-so much,” you said, intertwining your fingers. 

“I love you too baby, more than I could ever say, but maybe I could show you,” he said, pulling his underwear off and onto the floor. 

“Yes, yes please I want it,” you begged, spreading your legs wide for him. Jungkook moved slowly, crawling up the bed towards you like a hungry jaguar hunting the antelope. 

“I know you do, so do I, fuck are you sure you’re wet enough? Do you want me to use a condom?” he asked, mind probably spiraling at the thought that this was actually going to happen now. 

“I’m wet enough, believe me, but you don’t have to use a condom. I’m on the pill,” you said softly, touching his cheek. “And I trust you.”

“Okay, whatever you want... might even give you my cum if you ask like a good girl,” he smirked, licking his lips before lining up with your entrance. You felt his tip rubbing against your clit for a few seconds before pushing down against your hole. Jungkook groaned when he sank in. Because fuck, it felt too good.

“You’re so tight, and wet and-shit, feels so good baby,” he praised you. 

A soft whimper and tear came from you as Jungkook slowly pushed in. Your breathing shallowed and Jungkook felt you tensing. 

“Ease up baby, I’ve got you, it’s okay,” he shushed, pressing gentle kissing to your sweaty hairline. 

“So big,” you mewled. 

“Almost there. Be a good girl and take it,” Jungkook moaned out. 

“Want it all,” you said, gripping his hips tight.

“Oh fuck,” he whispered as he bottomed out. Your cunt was stretched to its max it felt like. Jungkook held still as he could until you gave him the okay by tapping his side gently. 

“You sure you’re ready? I don’t want to hurt you,” he said, concerned. 

“I’m okay, please move,” you said, bucking your hips against his softly.

“Alright baby, hold on tight,” he smiled, before bringing your lips together and setting a slow pace. With each draw out and push in he felt incredible. So hot and big inside of you. But he wasn’t rushing either. You could feel every inch when he pushed in, and the slight ache when he pulled out. It didn’t hurt, it was more like you just wanted him there always. 

“Fuck, feels so good, daddy. Wanna cum, wanna cum please!” you cried, gripping his forearm. 

“Yeah? Wanna cum on this dick you dirty girl. Coat my dick, coat it in your cum for me,” he egged you on so much it made your head spin. 

You’d never felt like this during sex. Most of the time you were chasing after your orgasms. Sometimes having to finish yourself off after your partner had long since fallen asleep. But right now? You were being throw towards your end at a rapid pace. He’d barely been going a minute and you were already such a mess. 

“Shit so tight, fuck, come on baby. Cum, cum hard I wanna feel it,” Jungkook growled, leaning forward and capturing your lips in a tight lock. 

You moaned and cried against his lips as finally-finally your orgasm washed over you. Jungkook felt your walls flutter around him and he bit down on his lip as he pulled away from you, letting you ride through the afterglow slowly. Jungkook halted his movement when you started whimpering. 

“Too sensitive? Does it hurt?” Jungkook asked, eyes sparkling in the dark. 

“It doesn’t hurt, just want more,” you begged. One orgasm was never going to be enough with Jungkook. Because he felt so good, knew exactly where to touch and when to touch you. Fuck it was so god damn good you were still teary eyed. 

“My greedy slut wants another one?”

“Yes, yes please!” you said, moving against him, already feeling pleasure rather than the sharp ache. You cried out when Jungkook left your needy hole empty. 

“Lift your ass up in the air,” he demanded. Knees wobbly after your climax you almost fell, but Jungkook’s gentle grip was there to stabilize you. 

“L-Like this?” you asked, spine curved and hips jutting outward. 

“Just like that baby,” he said, approaching you with a gentle smack to your ass. 

“Oh!” you gasped, and Jungkook just laughed. You knew it didn’t hurt but you weren’t expecting to feel such a rush from it. 

“Like being spanked pretty?” he asked, landing another one on the other cheek. 

“Fuck!” you cried out, falling forward on your elbows. 

“I think you do baby slut,” he smirked, rubbing his fingers through your slick. He rubbed at your clit a little, enhancing the sensations all the more. 

“Daddy, fuck,” you said, arching your back. 

“Take my cock baby,” he said, rubbing it against your wet pussy. 

“Yes, yes,” you whispered to yourself. But Jungkook heard it as he pushed into you once more. Your warm walls welcoming him as he pushed inside your wet heat again and again. 

“That’s right, daddy’s cock is all you want isn’t it? Say daddy’s cock is all you need,” he encouraged. 

“D-Daddy’s-ah!” you cried out as Jungkook landed a sharper whack to your ass. 

“Say it,” he demanded. 

“Daddy’s cock is all I-hngh fuck! All I need!” you said, struggling to speak as Jungkook’s cock battered your core. 

“That’s it, that’s what daddy wants to hear. You’re my good slut, aw fuck, feels so fucking good,” he said, pushing forward harder. 

“So good daddy, feels so good,” you murmured, feeling your sanity slipping away from you. 

“Gonna fuck you dumb, you’ll be full of cum and uh fuck-jesus christ you’re so tight-and you’ll want more of it. In your mouth, in your pussy and on those fucking gorgeous tits, yes baby fuck it,” he groaned, molding his back to yours as he interlocked your fingers. 

“Uh uh uh, daddy I want it, pleas-s-se give me your cum,” you said, unable to really speak coherently at this point. 

“Fuck I’m gonna cum,” he whined, rutting into you harder, causing stars to erupt from behind your eyes. 

“Me-e too, fuck!” after a particularly harsh thrust Jungkook kissed your neck and you could feel him tensing up. 

“Right there baby, right there,” he groaned, gripping your hands tighter. 

“Jungkook,” you cried, orgasm finally taking you causing your walls to flutter around Jungkook’s cock. He’d already felt your climax once, but twice proved to be too much. Jungkook whispered your name into your neck as he came inside of you with a firm thrust. 

Your vision blurred as you felt Jungkook give a few more shallow thrusts inside of you, before pulling out and looking down at the mess you’d made. 

“Y/N? Sweetheart?” Jungkook’s voice was soft as he approached you. 

“Yes, kook?” you said, turning over.

“Wanna take a bath baby?” he asked, kissing your shin and up to your knee. 

“Mmm, yes. Wanna take one together?”

“Sounds perfect.”

Jungkook started the water and you both got in, relaxing against one another. Jungkook brought your body close to his, wrapping you up in his arms as he kissed your head, whispering sweet nothings into your ear. 

“Love you so much,” he said, bringing your fingers to his lips. 

“I love you too kook,” you said, bringing his head down to meet yours in a sweet kiss. 

This must be love. You thought to yourself. You may have almost puked because of how sweet your thoughts had turned. But you couldn’t help but let yourself be smooshy and gross with him. Because it was Jungkook. And he was everything you could ever want and more. 

Before you got too far into that, Jungkook pulled the plug on that bath and had you wrapped up in a towel. 

“Go get changed baby I’ll be right out,” he said, moving towards his sink no doubt to brush his teeth.. 

When you two finally got settled down and wrapped up in the sheets you kissed Jungkook’s chest before laying your head on it. 

Listening to his heartbeat lulled you off into a peaceful slumber.

This must be love.

[taesanluv3r]

pas de deux

hip-hop dancer! kim woonhak x ballet dancer! reader (ft. myung jaehyun & lee hyein as their best friends!)

rivals to lovers </3

teaser wc: 1,448

find the full version here > 🧸

enjoy this snippet ♡

⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖

“woah look at that, first place gets a cool trophy and everything!”

kim woonhak tells his best-friend jaehyun, eyes gleaming as he looks at the new poster that had just been put up on the school’s bulletin board. “guess that means i’ll be going home with a cool trophy then!” the all too familiar snarky voice is followed by the sound of feet strutting towards him. the boy turns around and is met, much to his dismay, with his sworn rival and arch nemesis, yn ln and her own best-friend, lee hyein. see, the young pair had been enemies since the elementary school talent show. he just couldn't believe that his powerful and energetic hip-hop routine tied with some flimsy ballet. and similarly, she just couldn't get past the idea of her graceful performance having the same score as his repetitive moves. and so, stubborn and arrogant as ever, the competition between the two continued on through middle school and up to this very moment right now, in the heart of their shared high school campus, right in front of the bulletin board.

“you wish!” the boy's friend says sternly, inflicting an eye roll from the rival girl. “no wait, he’s right…” hyein begins, her own eyes wandering off to inspect the poorly printed poster. “it’s a duet competition this time” she finishes, a finger pointed at the bold writing that very clearly said:

star academy’s annual DUET competition. pas de deux, or don’t!

“so?” yn scoffs, “i’ll just have to find a partner to beat you with” her words are sharp, her eyes shooting metaphorical lasers through his own narrow ones. the boy just laughs, adjusting the strap of his bag against his shoulder, “if anyone even wants to partner with such a prissy princess like you” his words make her smile, “aw…” she drags out, clutching onto her satin pointe shoes as she takes one more step closer to him, “you think i’m a princess?” the girl’s eyes are big, batting her eyelashes mockingly at the now fuming boy. the silence had become too loud, the hateful pair cussing each other out with just the fiery looks on their faces. “alrighty then!” hyein says, breaking the tension and pulling her friend out of the petty staring contest. “you’ve got a partner to find so let’s get going!” she continues, tilting her head to the side as she drags the girl away. “good luck finding someone to willingly dance with you!” yn yells one last time, catching a final glimpse of the boy’s middle finger up in the air before he was out of her line of sight.

౨ৎ

“i just don’t get it!” yn groans, head falling against the lunch table as she does so. “why won’t anyone partner up with me?” she turns to her friend who’s busy munching on the mystery meat-loaf that tasted a little too good that day. “maybe it’s because you’re an extremely pretentious prick?” hyein says while simultaneously chewing on her food. “ugh, this stinks!” her voice is hoarse from all the complaining she had been doing, “if you weren’t recovering from some stupid food poisoning, we could’ve done it together!” the ballet dancer whines, playfully hitting her best-friend on the shoulder and receiving a nasty look in return. “not my fault! i didn’t even know the cake was expired!” the girl sighs, deciding not to take all her frustrations out on her friend. “whatever, i’m gonna go blow off some steam” yn gets up, grabbing her pink duffle bag and water bottle. “don’t drive yourself insane, yn. i’m sure your knight in shining armor will come to you soon” hyein assures, still stuffing her face with her lunch. the girl smiles at her friend’s sweet words,

“let’s hope that happens soon, the competition is only two days away”

౨ৎ

“bro fuck this!” woonhak’s feet drag against the marble floors as he enters the classroom. “still no luck?” jaehyun asks, mindlessly stacking up his playing cards into some sort of structure on his desk. “seriously! why doesn’t anyone wanna dance with me? i’m literally the kim woonhak. i’m the best hip-hop dancer in this whole school!” the boy exclaims as he slumps down on a chair, the strength of his words sending his friend’s card structure to fall apart. jaehyun sighs, “dude, maybe if you weren’t such an arrogant asshole, someone would actually willingly work with you. just a thought” he ends his sentence with a click of the tongue before beginning to pick up his cards again. “ugh, whatever! it’s just so stupid…” the frustrated boy hunches over, the contact of his lips against the fabric of his jacket muffling his voice. “why don’t you dance with me, jae?” he suddenly suggests, head tilting to the side hopefully, but his friend just sighs once again. “and what? risk hurting the leg i just finished healing again? nah bro, you’re on your own for this one” the hip-hop dancer lets out one last annoyed groan before he suddenly gets off of his seat, causing his friend to look up at him confused. “where are you going?” jaehyun asks him, wondering why he was beginning to grab all of his things. “to get my mind off things, i’ll see ya later bro” woonhak bids, throwing his backpack over his shoulder. “don’t stress so much, man. you’ll find someone soon, trust”

“yeah, i better”

the kim boy doesn't know what to do. he had tried everything, and had asked everyone but he still had no one to dance with. that and with the competition being only two days away, it felt as though the boys head was about to explode. sulking, he wanders off to the academy's sports centre, his feet guiding him towards the dance room at the very end of the hall. his mind is all over the place, he doesn't even think to knock before he enters the room, it's usually empty anyways. the boy is lost in his thoughts for a moment, just a moment before the sound of piano enters his ears.

woonhak looks up, quietly shutting the door behind him as he does so and that's when he sees her. yn's eyes are shut, far too lost in the music to even notice his presence. he doesn't make it known either, watching in silence as she twirls on her toes, arms flailing up and down so gracefully as she turned. his eyes begin to glisten, the sheer passion in the way that she moves, 'has she always danced like that?' her feet tapped so delicately against the glossy wooden floors, her energy was strong, it was fierce and yet so vulnerable, like the slightest wrinkle in her light blue leggings could just ruin it all. the boy is in awe, eyes never leaving as they followed her across the room. her eyes remain closed, the piano number getting faster as she waltzed over to one end, preparing herself for the climax of her routine. taking a deep breath, her arms extend and a single leg lifts up into an arabesque. slowly, she returns into the fourth position, one foot crossing over the other, and her arms resting in front of her lower abdomen. yn twirls into a double pirouette, her arms swinging to her side as she leaps into a grand jeté. she's done it, her killing move that's supposed to win her all the roses, but just before her toes could grace the floors again, a loud thud had shaken her out of focus, causing her to slip against the ground and fall.

catching her breath, the confused girl looks up to find the culprit. her eyes wander over to the mirror, narrowing angrily as she watches her sworn enemy pick up the bag he had dropped just a moment ago. the bag that had made the loud noise that ruined her routine. yn gets up from off of the floor, fixing her leg warmers as she walked over to him. "what the fuck is your problem?!" she yells, not giving him enough time to explain before yelling some more. "i was literally about to land that jeté off so clean and then you just had to come in here and ruin it, didn't you?!" if this were a kid's show, there would be cheap cgi steam blowing right out of her bright red ears. "and you're not even gonna say anything? what are you, stupid?!" her breaths get heavier, partially from the routine she had just done and partially from the immense anger she was feeling. woonhak stares blankly at her, breathing softly before he finally speaks.

"woah"

⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖

end of snippet.

full fic coming soon!! send a message, send an ask, or leave a reply to lmk what you thought of this cheeky little snippet <3 EXCITED FOR U GUYS TO READ THE FULL THING HEHEHEH

[dreaminginpastels]

Hi Daniella!, Can I ask for a fem!reader for Conor Murphy, in which the reader has a big family with a couple of brothers and sisters (she is the oldest) and she wants to introduce Connor to them, but my poor Con is very insecure about it ?. If you don't fell like doing it is totally fine, take care ❤

Nela

open your eyes

pairing: connor murphy x fem!reader

summary: connor is finally comfortable to be himself in your relationship when you decide it’s time for him to meet your big family

warnings: slight angst, mentions of mental health struggles, bullying,  and insecurity (because it’s Connor)

reader pronouns: she/her (by request)

word count: 1.8k

*✧ deh masterlist | main masterlist | ask | taglist ✧*

Connor Murphy was in love with you. But then again, he’d never really had any other option. You weren’t the type to give up on anyone, and once you’d decided that you would be friends with Connor Murphy, well, the boy didn’t stand a chance.

He’d fallen for you slowly, ever careful with his fragile heart. Had done everything that he could to deter you. He’d put on a tough facade, determined to not fall for those doe eyes of yours, but his walls had started to crumble from the first moment he heard your sweet voice.

It had been your first day of school, a year ago or thereabouts, and he had been grabbing books out of his locker when he’d heard confident steps approaching him. He’d flinched, used to being grabbed and shoved against lockers, or shoved to the ground, books toppling around him. High schoolers were not kind. His nervous system relaxed, however, when he’d seen you looking up at him, shoulders back, with a determined smile on your face. “Hi, I’m new here and-”

“I can tell.”

“Oh! Right, sorry.” You smiled, shaking off his rude interruption. “I’m y/n, it’s my first day and I was wondering if you could tell me where room 416 is?”

He rolled his eyes, painful as it was to treat such adorableness with displeasure. Still, he couldn’t let anyone in. Not when he’d been hurt too many times before. “Look, what I mean is I can tell you’re new here because no one speaks to me unless they’re looking for trouble. But, if it gets you out of my hair, it’s down the hall, to your left, and then your third right. Got it?”

You nodded, smiling up at him as he turned back to his locker. “Thank you…uh…”

He sighed, closing his locker door and turning to you. “It’s Connor.”

“Oh, well thank you Connor, I-”

Your voice had paused as he turned and walked down the hallway in the opposite direction. That hadn’t stopped you though. “I hope you have a great day!”

It would take him months to tell you, but as he walked away from you that day, a small smile spread across his face at your kind words. He told himself not to think anything of it, but figured as he’d probably never see you again, he could allow himself to enjoy that small moment of kindness. It was a rare occurrence for him after all.

Until it wasn’t. A few days later, he was sitting alone in the cafeteria when a lunch tray appeared next to him. Again, he flinched at the sound of it hitting the table, used to being approached by bullies intending to threaten him or tease him about…existing…he figured. But again, he’d been surprised when those increasingly familiar doe eyes looked up at him. “Hi Connor, it’s uh, y/n? We met the other day. I just wanted to say thank you for helping me find my class. It’s nice to have a friend, this school is bigger than I imagined.”

He was flabbergasted. A beautiful girl kept approaching him, and had now decided that they were friends? After a miniscule interaction? He had to be dreaming. These kinds of things didn’t happen to guys like him. And yet there you were, awaiting his response patiently while he sat there like a moron staring blankly back at you. Nice one Connor. He laughed as he thought back to how awkward he’d been.

“People don’t usually sit with me.”

Somehow emboldened by his words, you shuffled closer. He felt his walls begin to crumble. “Well there’s always a first!”

He stared at you before coughing himself into action, he figured he should at least give talking to you a go. “How, uh- How was your first day anyway?”

Your mouth broke into a warm smile. Crumble. “It was alright, a bit lonely, people don’t seem to want to give new people a chance here, but-”

“Oh, they don’t give anyone that isn’t a part of their cliques a chance, don’t take it personally.”

“Thanks Connor,” Those doe eyes met his cautious irises. Crumble. “So how’s your day?”

He grimaced then, not used to people asking him about himself. He took a deep breath and gave his best attempt at a smile. “It’s, uh- okay? I don’t usually have someone to talk to about my day so I’m not really sure what to say.”

You frowned at him, which, against his better judgement, caused a deep laugh to emerge from his chest. Crumble. He couldn’t help it, your concern for him was adorable. Those walls he built to keep himself safe were no match for your kind heart. “Well, here.”

You leaned down and took out a notebook and pen from your bag before writing on the page, ripping it out, and handing it to him. When he took the page from you, his hand trembled as he realised what had happened. He looked up at you with the expression of a child being given their first dose of affection. You smiled, resolute. “Now you have my number, so you can call or text to tell me about your day if you ever want to.”

He couldn’t get the smile off his face for the rest of the day, palming the page in the pocket of his hoodie whenever he needed a reminder that someone as wonderful as you actually seemed to care about him. Little did he know how your heart had soared when, an hour after school, your phone buzzed with his first message:

Hi y/n, this is Connor. Thanks for being my friend. You’re a cool person.

Followed immediately by another after as he realised that his message was a bit cold.

:)

You’d giggled the whole way home.

A year later, and you had happily been dating for eight months. It had been tough, what with Connor’s seemingly endless self-doubts and insecurities, but you were going strong. Connor had made you more considerate and thoughtful, taking extra care to stop and pay attention to the world around you, and you had made him open up, showed him that it was okay to let the world in and that not everyone was out to hurt him.

Connor was finally comfortable being himself, secure in the relationship, when you decided that it was time for your worlds to combine. Your mother had been insisting for months that she wanted to have your boyfriend over for dinner, and having seen Connor so happy lately, you figured now was as good a time as any.

You imagined it going so smoothly, with Connor melting into your arms and being so excited to meet the people that loved you as much as he did. What happened instead was that Connor stared at you wide-eyed for a moment, then stood up, mumbled something about being late for class, and left the cafeteria. Despite it being the middle of the lunch break.

Anyone else would’ve been worried but you knew Connor. He just needed a bit of time to think about things and then he would come find you and talk about it. Sure enough, he approached your locker right after the school bell rang to finish the day.

He looked at you nervously, arms folding in on themselves. “Can, uh, we talk?”

You nodded. “Of course we can, love.”

You walked to a nearby park where you often spent time, the two of you sitting down on a park bench. A group of young kids were kicking a soccer ball around between them, while others sat on swings. You looked at Connor whose gaze was locked on the group kicking the ball around in a desperate bid to avoid your eyes. “Sweetheart, what’s going on in that mind? Please let me in.”

He sighed, studying the gravel below you with his head in his hands. “I don’t think it’s a good idea for me to meet your family.”

Your eyebrows furrowed in concern. “And why is that?”

Running his hands through his hair, he finally looked up at you. “I’m not a..people person…like you. I mean, you remember what I was like before we were dating, I’m not good at looking at people, let alone talking to them, let alone trying to impress your family who…”

His eyes widened. “-your large family, who I’m just never going to be enough for. Your parents are already going to stress me out and you can at least hold an adult conversation with them. How am I supposed to make a good impression on your siblings? They’re kids! I’m horrible with kids.”

Just as Connor was returning to his head-in-hands-moping position, a ball landed at his feet. “Hey, pass us the ball!”

Connor slowly stood up, gently dribbling the ball between his feet before jogging over to the group and passing it to the boy that had called out. “Dude, that was some super quick footing before, do you play professionally or something?”

You watched the young boy blush, rubbing a hand behind his neck bashfully. “Haha, no!”

Connor leaned down, “You sure? With moves like that I wouldn’t be surprised if you make the big leagues with some patience and practice!”

The kid squinted up at your boyfriend, smiling excitedly, and your heart melted at the sight. Connor reached over and ruffled the boy’s hair before heading back over to you. He turned around to the boy, pointing a finger at him and calling out, “Gotta put in the hard work, alright?”

The kid nodded as Connor sat back next to you. You noted how his body language had shifted: he was more open, happier, content. At least until he remembered the conversation he had left. He sighed, “I just…they’re going to hate me.”

“Connor, hey,” You reached out an arm, noting the way he flinched before easing into your touch. It broke your heart how much pain he held inside him, despite how far he’d come. How far you both had. “They’re going to love you. You have so much heart, my love. You try so hard to be loving and kind despite all that you’re going through. How could they not love you?”

He lingered in your gaze before looking back out to the park, letting out a deep exhale. You took the opportunity to continue. “I mean, look at how you just made that little boy’s day. He’s not going to forget the guy that went up to him in the park and believed in him and his dreams. If you can do that, you can sure as hell hold a conversation with my siblings.”

He looked up at you, a glint of hope in his eye and a small smile appearing on his face. “You think?”

You smiled, “Absolutely. And besides, do you really think I’d ever let you get hurt by someone, even slightly? If my family says anything that upsets you, I’ll be right there. And I’ll give them a piece of my mind.”

He laughed and wrapped his arms around you, angling down to kiss the top of your hair. “How did I ever get lucky enough to find you?”

You smiled into his embrace, “You opened your eyes.”

a/n: hi lovely Nela! thank you for being so patient waiting for me to tackle one of your wonderful requests. I figured since you’re a bit nervous about your upcoming adventure that I would surprise you with a story to cheer you up! I hope that this is everything that you wanted it to be. thank you for always being such a wonderful friend 💜

p.s. I listened to the writing playlist you made me while writing this and I absolutely adore it 🥰

[kpopmakesmeweep]

badboy!yeonjun x innocent!reader 

word count: 21k

angst, fluff, smut

when your teacher asked you to tutor in the beginning of the school year, you were hesitant even then. 

you knew that it meant your lunch period and one study hall for the day were gonna be completely booked, helping younger kids grasp the basic idea that the mitochondria was the powerhouse of the cell.

but then you met one young girl desperate to pass her first test in october and knew your teacher had gotten you, sending a small, defeated smile her way as you gave her the okay to put your name on the list. 

you didn’t expect to come back from winter break with the news that the next student you’d be tutoring wasn’t a sweet 7th grade girl but none other than choi yeonjun. 

the overwhelmingly attractive but horribly intimidating boy who was a year older than you and had, quite possibly, one of the worst reputations the school has ever seen.

if he wasn’t getting suspended for fighting or smoking on school grounds, you’d attempt to block out the mindless gossip about him and all the college girls he’d frequently fraternize with. 

he was in your lunch period when you were a sophomore and he was a junior and you couldn’t help but be fascinated by how handsome he was. how he carried himself and how everyone else seemed to be fascinated by him too.

he was always wearing some variation of black, like his closet was just an empty void of black leather, dark cotton and chains. if he didn’t have on a beanie or hat, his then blue hair was a mess of waves that always made you look a few seconds too long.

you’ll never forget the day that he caught you, your nose in a textbook as you studied for a midterm before a loud shout of his name caught your attention. 

you looked up and watched one of his friends playfully punch him in the arm, something about him hooking up with the older girl he had his eye on first and yeonjun only smirking at him devilishly. 

he didn’t look apologetic or regretful in the slightest, more so like he’d do again just because he could and just because he knew the girl would be eager to have another go with him. 

your breath caught in your throat when his deep brown eyes met yours, his head cocked as he held your gaze with all the confidence and smugness you could never have. 

it took his lips quirking into a cocky smile for you to snap out of it, cheeks warming and stomach churning at getting caught before you dropped your gaze right back down to your book.

it was a quick and thorough reminder that this is where you feel comfortable and this is where you belong - with your nose in a book and your mind on your studies. 

you’ve always intended to just get through high school with good grades and minimal distractions, a small (almost non-existent) friend group that left you able to make straight a’s and work a small, part-time job.

you’d done a pretty good job of that thus far, no bad boys covered in all black and sliver chains to show you that, maybe, getting out of your comfort zone isn’t such a bad thing after all.  

you met yeonjun during your 7th period study hall a week later than intended, him not showing up to either of the periods your teacher informed you both last week. 

you weren’t surprised in the slightest but also wouldn’t dare tattle on him, simply dodging the questions from your teacher or giving her a polite smile and cryptic answer. 

but you couldn’t even stop the way your eyes widened when the library door opened and he was making his way toward you, black beanie placed on his head along with a dark shirt tight across his chest paired with gray sweatpants that made you bite down on your lip.

his hair was pink now, long with a slight wave to it that looked all too soft and inviting to touch; the color probably shouldn’t work on anyone but, of course, it works on him. 

devastatingly attractive in a way that doesn’t seem fair nor human. 

he hasn’t said a word to you, he wasn’t even within six feet of you yet, but you were already scared shitless. you already didn’t trust yourself to be around him and not make a bumbling fool of yourself. 

a pretty smirk crossed his face when he stood in front of you, looking down at you with a playful look in his eye that was far too mocking and sinister. 

“hey. y/n, right?”

you never would’ve pictured this man saying (or even knowing) your name, nor him looking at you so willingly and intensely, but you have to quickly snap yourself out of it. 

this was as professional a relationship could be between two students and you really had to get it together. 

“hi, yes... that’s me,” you say softly. 

so softly that you’re not even sure he can hear it but you can, unfortunately, hear the tremor in your own voice and it’s nothing but absolute embarrassment. 

he happens to like it though, if the way his eyes light up and his smirk widens tells you anything. 

“i’m yeonjun.”

“i know.”

you say the statement far too quickly and it causes your face to warm, your mouth hanging open as the amusement continues to build behind his eyes; you can see with your own that the boy is too handsome for his own good but something tells you he’s probably far too charming as well. 

“i mean... we were supposed to meet last week,” you attempt to clarify.

it seems like a good save, something to make, both, your embarrassment lessen slightly and for him to know you’re aware that he missed the two sessions last week. 

but it doesn’t seem to work, the boy sitting down across from you with all the confidence and smoothness in the world. he leans in closer and you hold your breath, horribly lonely and touch-starved heart fluttering in your chest. 

“i know, sorry about that,” he says, a genuineness in his voice that you can’t help but question. “i was busy with some things.”

you don’t know what to say so you don’t say anything, not even wanting to think about what kind of things keeps a man like him busy.

your teeth sinks into your bottom lip nervously and you can just feel his eyes burning into you, moving across your pink face and down to your soft white sweater; it makes you look every bit as innocent as he’s presumed you to be and he can’t say it doesn’t make him smile. 

“and yet, the teacher didn’t say anything to me about missing.”

you meet his eyes at his questioning tone, so scrutinizing and intense that you feel very grateful about your decision not to blow up his spot; you don’t even wanna know what he looks like when he’s angry. 

or maybe you do, some darker and suppressed part of yourself thinks. 

“that’s because i didn’t tell her,” you say quietly, a lump forming in your throat that you’re trying desperately to push down. “i didn’t wanna....” 

you almost say tattle and you think your face wold turn an unnatural shade of red if that silly word left your mouth in front of him.

so you meekly and sweetly decide on, “i didn’t wanna get you in trouble,” a smile gracing his face that almost makes you feel like you’d done a good job or something. 

and how ridiculous does that sound? you did a good job for the older, delinquent boy - you don’t know what’s gotten into you. 

maybe his smile and his eyes and just the way he’s looking at you is making you feel as if you’re actually something to look at - you’ve never really been observed the way he’s observing you. 

a deep, melodic chuckle leaving his mouth causes you to swallow nervously, watching him with a blank expression because you’re not sure if he’s laughing at you or with you.

your heart stutters when he leans back to stretch, his arm squeezing at the back of his neck; it takes everything in you not to watch his arm flex.

“how’d i know you were a good girl, hm?”

your eyes widen at his words, stomach swooping in a way that’s only ever happened when you watch couples on tv or read about a romance in books. 

because it’s not only his words, it’s the way he carries himself. the way he’s looking at you and speaking to you, the way you never thought anyone would - let alone him. 

he must mistake your utter...shock and fascination for confusion, eyes wide and cheeks flushed and he suddenly wants to place his hand on your cheek. 

see if it’s as warm and soft as it appears to be in this very moment.

“you were in my lunch last year, no?” he hums, looking directly at you with zero ounce of fear and ever bit of confidence. “always with a textbook or writing something.”

he doesn’t remember all the girls that gawk at him but he remembered you immediately. 

caught your gaze early last year and saw something flicker in your eyes, a soft and innocent fascination he wasn’t used to seeing but immediately made him wanna ruin you - he wanted to ruin you and he didn’t even know you. 

he just knew that he’d watch you sometimes, discreetly and quickly, but enough to get his fix.

when he entered the cafeteria and made sure you were sitting there with your your face buried in a book. 

when you’d get up to buy lunch or a bottle of water, pull down your skirt or adjust your hair in a way that made him wanna touch you in a similar fashion.

when you’d leave five minutes early (in what he fantasized was so you wouldn’t be late) and send him one last glance. feel your soft, hesitant gaze on his face and meet it carelessly at the very last second.

just enough to watch you get shy and see the blush so similar to now cross your cheeks. 

he didn’t know your name and he, truthfully, never intended on learning it. because as much as he wanted to truly ruin you, he knew that’s all it was - a dark, twisted fantasy that someone like him shouldn’t act on. 

but then when he walked in and saw you here, the tutor he was dreading to meet in such a familiar position, he knew immediately that you were her. 

the cute girl from his lunch he wasn’t sure was an angel he wanted to protect or someone he wanted to fuck the shit out of. 

you weren’t sure what to think right now, not wanting to get your hopes up or think too much into his question - you were in my lunch last year, no?

think that you were special and he remembers you for reasons far too fantastical so you only nod, figuring he could be taking a guess; there’s only three lunch periods after all. 

“yeah. your hair was blue.”

a smirk crosses his face, chest warming at the fact you remembered him (even though the cocky, confident part inside of him knew you would). 

“yes it was,” he confirms, smiling down at you in a way that makes your heart jump and pound even more. ”i was hoping you’d remember. because i knew i recognized you from somewhere.”

you don’t know how you’re gonna do this. you can barely look at him, how are you supposed to talk to him and teach him twice a week and actually-

“i do wanna ask you something else though.”

your eyebrows pull together at the slight change in his voice, cocking your head to the side as you look at him.

he’s leaning in a little closer now, tiny pink strands hanging from his beanie as his brown eyes bore into yours. there’s still some amusement twinged in his eyes but it all looks very deceptive, unnerving a part of you that your stupid little heart is ignoring. 

he doesn’t allow you to ask him what before he starts talking again. 

“how about we keep these sessions the way they’ve been?” 

your eyebrow raises as confusion continues to plague you; your sessions haven’t even started? 

you haven’t even taught him anything, what could he possibly- but it’s the moment he opens his mouth to speak again, you realize that’s exactly the point. 

“you tell the teacher i’m coming to these and i’ll tell her what a good job you’re doing. how much i’m learning from you and shit.”

a smirk crosses his face when he peers into your eyes, catching the nervous, unsure look in them that only makes his smirk widen - you really are too cute. 

you, on the other hand, don’t know how you feel about his suggestion; you just know how you feel about lying. 

it doesn’t sit well with you and you don’t wanna get in trouble. 

the teacher has a class during this period so it’s not like she’d come down and check but it still makes you incredibly queasy. 

and if he needed tutoring in the first place, he obviously needs help. he’s a senior and needs to keep his grades up so he can graduate. it’d be your fault if he didn’t pass and you’d hate to be the reason he gets-

movement in front of you causes your thoughts to immediately stop, body freezing as you watch him lift his arm and bring his hand to your head. 

he moves a strand of hair from your face before smoothing out the slight crease in your forehead, biting down on his lip when he feels your skin is just as soft and smooth as he suspected. 

“what are you thinking so hard about?”

the deep, low tone of his voice and inquisitive look on his face is dangerous, almost as dangerous as the frantic beating of your heart and the way it’s about to pound out of your chest. 

it’s like he has electric sparks shooting from his hand, making you feel extremely exposed and vulnerable even though his touch is quite gentle and innocent.

“i.... it’s just....” you stutter out, taking a deep breath because you know you need to get it together fast. “you’ve been having trouble, right? that’s... why you needed tutoring in the first place.”

his eyebrow quirks up at your comment and for a split second, you think you’ve offended him. 

“i don’t want you to fail, yeonjun.”

he doesn’t allow himself to dwell on your words, realize that no one has so openly and sweetly said that to him before. or even cared enough to tell him that they don’t want him to fail.

he knows the teachers and counselors get him help because it’s their job. 

he knows his parents bitch and complain about it because they don’t want him repeating high school or wasting their money. 

he knows anyone who says anything to him about it is just doing it to make themselves look like a good person or friend. 

but you just so openly and sweetly said it, a deep concern in your eyes that he knows he can’t dwell on or his similar feelings are gonna arise from last year’s lunch.

where he’s about to throw caution to the wind and do anything and everything he wants to someone as innocent and sweet as you; but he can’t do that and he knows it, he knows that’s why these session can’t happen - on top of the fact that it’s not only you. 

he smokes during lunch and into this period. 

and there’s just no fucking way he’s spending that time suppressing his predatory attraction to you while learning about shit he doesn’t understand and being high as a kite. 

“you don’t gotta worry about me, angel,” he hums lowly, the name falling so naturally and smoothly from his mouth, he doesn’t even realize. “just do that for me, yeah? then you’ll have 7th free.”

you don’t hear much after he calls you angel, just that he’s asking you to do something for him and you’re blindly and dumbly nodding because he just called you that.

and it’s not until he smiles and thanks you deeply, looking over your face once more before saying that he’ll see you around that you realize you’re alone. 

sitting there as you watch yeonjun walk out the door without a glance back and come to terms with the fact you just agreed to lie to your teacher for him.

for almost a month, you were able to keep it up.

it was terrifying and debilitating and it almost sent you into a full blown identity crisis, but you’d somehow managed to do it.

that was until this afternoon, when your teacher cut through the cafeteria during lunch with a cup of coffee in hand and suspicion in the pit of her stomach. 

she saw you sitting there alone, your own books sprawled out around you as you wrote down notes before her short call of your name had your head snapping up. 

her eyes watching you quizzically made your own widen, stomach sinking and heart starting to pound as he she made her way over to you. 

“hi, y/n. where’s yeonjun today? it’s wednesday.”

the period only began ten minutes ago so it wouldn’t be weird for you to say that he wasn’t here yet. that he got held up after class and would be on his way shortly.

but you were just nervous and so bad at lying that you blurted out that he left to go to the bathroom, her eyes roaming the table in what you could only assume was for his books. 

“he took his backpack with him,” you tell her quietly, smiling softly in an effort to hide your guilt and distress. she only hums softly before nodding her head, taking your word for it because why wouldn’t she?

you’re good and studious and wouldn’t ever lie to a teacher.

but then when she comes down to the library next week during 7th period with her class, catching you at the table by yourself, you do it again. 

look her in the face and panic, make a scene of collecting your books as you tell her you forgot you guys were meeting in the cafeteria today - placing the blame on yourself.

you spent the rest of the period in the bathroom, collecting your thoughts and attempting to calm yourself down because you can’t keep lying. 

you haven’t even talked to yeonjun since the first time you met in the library, only seeing him in passing in the hallway or after school. 

he’ll send you a nod paired with his signature smirk and you’ll send him a small smile back, dipping your head before your cheeks flush at the mere sight of his eyes. 

you wish you hadn’t agree to this. 

you wish he didn’t effect you so much and you wish you could tell him you either need to actually help him or tell the teacher he doesn’t want to, because you’re losing your mind. 

you’re anxious and upset and not feeling good about yourself, barely able to look your teacher in the face these days. 

it’s on a friday before lunch, the bell ringing ready to dismiss you from her class, that it all comes crashing down.

she asked you to stay behind for a moment, everything about her face calm and neutral as you made your way over to her desk. 

you were anything but calm as you stood before her, that familiar feeling of dread and guilt rushing in your stomach as you smiled softly at her and asked if everything was okay. 

“yes, i just wanted to say what a great job you’re doing with yeonjun.”

you don’t even know what your face looks like but you know it’s probably the face of someone incredibly guilty, being praised for something you haven’t been doing and taking credit for it even though you know it’s wrong.

the feeling in your stomach confirms all of those feelings, tight and fluttery and buzzing with upset.

“o-oh?” 

“yeah,” she smiles tightly, looking over your face before speaking again. “we just took our third test and he did great. in the low 90s.”

a part of you desperately hopes that to be true, that maybe he started applying himself and somehow started to grasp the material all on his own. you smile at the thought that that’s the case, nodding your head as you, against your better judgment, keep up the facade. 

“i’m happy for him. he’s been working very hard. w-we studied at our last session for it, actually, and he really seemed to be understanding it.”

the contemplative look she gave you should’ve been the first sign that she knew you were full of shit, a quiet hum leaving her mouth. she holds your gaze until the moment you drop it, looking down at your white sneakers until she calls your name softly. 

“y/n... why have you been lying to me?” 

your lips press together as tears prick your eyes, all of the guilt and shame rushing through you at once. 

“he failed his test and i know you guys haven’t been meeting.”

she knows that because you can’t lie. she knows that because yeonjun still doesn’t know anything and all of the students she’s recommended to you have passed with flying colors. 

she knows because when you look up at her, your lip is trembling and it looks like you’re about to burst into tears.

“i... i’m so sorry.”

but even then, even after this moment right here, you’re still not gonna tell on yeonjun. because you don’t want him getting in trouble and you’re not gonna try to excuse your own behavior by admitting you agreed to it. 

you’re just as at fault as the older boy and you’re not gonna pretend you’re not. 

“why have you been lying? you could’ve just told me if you didn’t feel comfortable tutoring him or it wasn’t working out.”

because she knows yeonjun’s reputation. she knows he’s a year older and that you’re one of the shyer students in her class. she was hesitant at first to even put you two together but thought you’d be able to get through to him. 

and because you don’t know what to say, how to make up an excuse that puts neither of you at fault, you don’t say anything. just continue to apologize with teary eyes and a shaky voice before she eventually lets out a sigh. 

“take the next few days to figure it out. try to work on it with him or come to me and be honest that it’s not gonna work. but you didn’t have to lie to me, y/n. i’m a little disappointed in you.”

those words hit you harder than you care to admit, more tears building as you nod your head and quickly leave the room.

you knew from the beginning that it was wrong.

you never felt good about it and you knew it was bad but you still took part in it. she has every right to be disappointed in you and it feels like everything you worked so hard for has been ruined. 

now you look like a liar who can’t be trusted. 

now any time you tell her about another fellow student you’re working with, like the 7th grader you got through to or the 9th grader you helped get an a on their test, she’s gonna wonder if you really did that.

if you really helped them or if you’re just lying about that, too. telling them the answers to their homework or lazily explaining the concepts to them like you don’t work hard with each and every one of them. 

you’re surprised to see yeonjun when you make it to lunch a few moments later, your stomach still in knots and left over tears in your eyes. 

you don’t even realize you’re standing in front of his table until you hear one of his friend’s deep voices, a brash “who are you?” not even filling you with fear. 

you’re only looking at yeonjun pathetically, wide teary eyes and pouty lips in an effort to hold back more tears.

yeonjun’s dressed in his usual attire but you can’t even focus on that, his pink hair flawless against his black shirt and chain hanging around his neck as he adjusts it carelessly. 

soobin’s words catch his attention before your appearance does, looking at the front of the table and taking in the sight of wide, teary eyes and pouty lips; it pulls at something in his chest more than he cares to admit.

“yeonjun, can i talk to you for a second?” 

your voice is wobbly and timid and everything about it so incredibly embarrassing, the tears in your eyes obvious to all the young men around the table. 

you probably look like some girl he slept with and then left on read, begging him for another chance because your heart can’t take not being with him. because you got attached and now it feels like you need him. 

but, really, you just need him to let you tutor him. 

you can’t disappoint the teacher anymore and you had a job to do with him; you should’ve never told him that lying would be okay. 

“who’s this?” his friend asks with a smirk, his hair a bright shade of purple that looks striking next to yeonjun’s. 

“no one,” yeonjun’s quick to snap, looking at you before quickly getting up and guiding you out of the cafeteria by the small of your back. 

he walks down a secluded hallway and out to the garden of the school, looking at the tears in your eyes and feeling himself frown. 

“what happened?”

“i... she found out we haven’t been meeting,” you mumble, feeling silly and childish for crying in front of him about something like this; but you can’t help how you feel, you can’t help feeling sad and guilty about all of this. 

your heart drops when he actually smirks at you, looking over your face with a gaze that’s just as soft as it is amused.

you’re almost positive he’s about to laugh at you, call you a loser for crying over something as juvenile as getting caught in a silly lie and hurt your feelings even more. 

but then you’re quickly stiffening when his hand reaches up, gently brushing at your tears and marveling in just how soft your skin is. 

“that’s why you’re crying?” 

you’re embarrassed to say the least, any words you’d use to justify your reaction caught in your throat - and the smirk on his face isn’t helping either.

“you’re too pretty to cry over stupid shit like that, y/n.”

“it’s not stupid,” you respond, voice shaky and demeanor meek but still able to talk back. 

because it’s not stupid to you. wanting to be nice and studious and a good person isn’t stupid. not wanting to be a liar or someone who goes back on their word isn’t stupid. 

“she trusted me to help you and i lied to her.”

“we lied to her,” he says, voice and eyes teasing as he bends down to be on your level. you think he’s trying to make you feel better, a soft playfulness on his face that does anything but.

because you aren’t like him. 

you aren’t cool and feared and you can’t not care about how you effect other people. 

“why didn’t you just tell her it was my idea?” he asks suddenly, his eyes roaming your face in such a gentle but curious way. “she probably already knows that.”

“i... i didn’t want you to get in trouble.”

he rises to his full height as a small smile crosses his face, your soft voice and sweet words again effecting him far too much. he shouldn’t feel this way toward you and he shouldn’t want to be tutored now.

he shouldn’t be reaching out to touch the smooth skin of your cheek, a few stray tears making his lips fall into the smallest of frowns as you hear his voice the softest it’s ever been. 

“i wouldn’t get in trouble, angel.”

and there’s that word again. making your wet eyes widen and stomach to flutter, wondering how and why that simple word sounds so nice leaving his mouth. 

maybe because you’ve never been called that before. 

could only imagine being called that by someone, let alone him, in such a way. or maybe it’s because it is him, the boy you watched for months on end, forever fascinated by the way he carried himself. 

or maybe it’s because-

“but even if i did, how’s that your problem? why would you care?”

it’s a fair question you suppose but it doesn’t stop you from licking at your lips nervously, an all too familiar (and embarrassing) blush warming your cheeks. 

“i mean... it’s not,” you mutter shyly, not sure if you’re more intimidated by him calling you out or the look on his face. 

but even with those feelings, you’re still able to meet his gaze. 

take in the deep, dark intensity staring back at you in his brown eyes. they’re softer than one would expect, almost soft enough to make you forget what you were wanting to say. 

“but it’s just as much my fault as it is yours. so it didn’t seem fair.”

he smirks so he doesn’t say anything too brash, looking over the blush on your cheeks. his hand itches to move your hair behind your ear, a move he’d always do because he knew it was charming. 

knew it’d get him laid and get a girl’s heart fluttering.

but now he wants to do it just to touch you, feel your hair and skin and watch the blush on your cheeks deepen; but before he can do anything, he’s surprised to hear you speak anything.

“but it’s also not fair to keep lying,” you say softly, a broken little smile crossing your face as you look at him. “i actually really hated the lying... so if you don’t wanna do the sessions, i’m gonna tell her it’s not gonna work for us. but if you change your mind, i’m still free during those periods.”

at that moment, he had every intention of telling you no. 

he didn’t wanna give up his free time and energy to learn about things he’s absolutely sure he’s never gonna need to know after this. 

he didn’t wanna sit through the sessions high or not get high at all, the only way he’s able to cope with the last period of the school day knowing that he could roll a joint in his car with soobin. 

he didn’t wanna resist his obvious attraction and borderline fascination with you, act on it in a way he knows you’re not ready for and in a way he shouldn’t.

but when he walked in the library on monday, the time he told you he’d get back to you, you looked up and smiled at him. it was such a small, quick smile but everything about it called to him.

the twinge in your eyes and the way your hair fell, how even though your smile was small, it lit up your face and made you the prettiest girl he’d ever seen in his life.

at that moment, you were positive he was about to tell you no.

that thanks but no thanks, he’s absolutely not gonna spend his free period being tutored by a younger student who only stutters and blushes in his presence. 

but when he sat down in front of you, a smirk on his face and eyebrow quirked, you couldn’t even hold back your look of surprise. 

a deep chuckle left his mouth when he caught your expression, the sound one of the best noises you’ve ever heard.  

“what? did you think i wasn’t coming back, angel?”

it took you a month to see yeonjun was just as confident and just as much trouble as you’d expected. 

he was far too charming and attractive and funny, a sarcasm and wit in him that made you muffle your giggles like a middle school girl. 

you weren’t used to talking playfully with the people you tutored, always so focused on getting the work done and making sure you were doing a good job explaining the material for them.

but yeonjun always made sure to delay it, attempt to get to know you before you could even discuss his homework or review sheet; and even though it hasn’t been easy, he’s been persistent in breaking down that wall you put up.

“did the flashcards help or do you think you’re more of a-”

“why don’t you ever go out?”

you suppress the urge to let out a sigh as you turn to look at him, his expressive eyes looking over your face.

you’ve gotten used to the feel of his gaze on you, almost like it was burning into your skin and leaving you exposed to the bone, but it didn’t help when you made eye contact.

looked into his eyes and saw him looking back at you so confidently and so easily, you couldn’t help but feel flustered.

“what do you mean?”

you know exactly what he means but it’s the only thing you could think to say.  

you know more than anyone how much time you spend alone in your room, watching tv series and reading books and reorganizing until you don’t even recognize your own space.

but it’s not that you’re bothered by it, that’s what you like going. not going out isn’t something you find bad or upsetting.

“i mean i see people from your grade at our parties a lot,” he hums lowly, his eyes leaving yours only to look at the soft, pastel pink material of your sweater.

“but you’re never there,” he continues, looking at you and cocking his head to the side questioningly. “why’s that?”

“well, i’m not...invited, i guess,” you mumble out, ignoring the way your cheeks warm even more. “i like sticking to myself. and staying home.”

the words and your tone bring a pout to his face, your eyebrow raising at the sight. why is looking at you like that?

“well now you have an invite,” he says, a teasing smile crossing his face. “come to my friend’s party tonight. soobin, do you know him? he has the purple hair?”

his voice is far too sweet and soft compared to the look in his eye, teasing and flirty and reminding you of just how dangerous he is. how he’s capable of having so many different sides, he nearly gives you whiplash. 

he’s the bad boy everyone thinks of him to be, skipping class and getting high and ditching tutoring lessons by smiling too kindly at a mousy little tutor. 

he’s the play boy you see come out when he looks at you a second too long, bringing a blush to your cheeks and stirring something very unfamiliar in the pit of your stomach. 

but then he has a softer side you see sometimes, like when he decided to do these lessons in the first place because you cried to him and made yourself look even more pathetic. 

“i’m happy you decided to do these,” you say to him quietly. 

it was only your second session but you wanted him to know you were supportive of his decision. that, even if your word meant nothing (because, really, who are you to him?), you were proud of him.

it’s not easy for a senior to give up a period or two to learn about things they don’t understand; you probably wouldn’t wanna do it either, if school and learning didn’t come naturally to you. 

but for whatever reason, he agreed to do it.

“oh?” he hums, the trademark smirk on his face causing your cheeks to warm.

“yeah,” you smile softly, nodding your head before looking down at your clasped fingers. “i just... wanted you to know that. i understand why you didn’t want to but i think it’ll be good for-”

“why do you think i didn’t want to?” 

you look at him and for a split second you’re scared that you offended him. you suppose you don’t really know him well enough to make an assumption about him but you just assumed he-

“or, you know what, no,” he says, shaking his head as he pushes his chair closer to yours. 

he leans over the desk the same way he did during your first meeting last month, bringing your faces closer until you can smell cologne and the faint stench of cigarettes. 

“i wanna hear why you think i changed my mind?”

you quirk an eyebrow as you look at him, staring blankly until you realize he just plans on doing the same. 

“well... i guess it’s because you wanted to do good, right?” you ask meekly, unsure why he changed his mind but knowing that you were happy he did. “and maybe you didn’t wanna disappoint the teacher.”

a deep chuckle leaves his mouth that has butterflies erupting in your stomach, watching as he shakes his head and meets your gaze again. 

“is that no it?” you ask bravely, your wide eyes and confused look causing his own stomach to do flips. “what’s so funny?”

but he’s quick to push it down, reach over to ruffle your hair in a way that makes your eyebrows pull together. 

“nothing, angel,” he mumbles, his eyes roaming yours. you see the exact moment there’s s witch behind them, a flirty and darker front he puts up melting into a soft, vulnerable look.

“but thank you for telling me that. because i’m happy i’m doing them, too.”

he has yet to tell you the reason all these weeks later, probably because you wouldn’t dare ask again, but whatever it was, must’ve greatly inspired him.

because over these weeks, he’s really been putting in the work. writing notes and listening to you and asking questions when he’s not making you blush or inviting you out just for you to decline. 

“so...?” he asks, a charismatic smile stretching across his face as he looks at you awaitingly. “what do you say? you wanna come?”

“no, thank you,” you smile politely, feeling bad for downright denying it but the offer feeling far too similiar to cliche movies you’ve watched. where the popular boy invites the nerd to a party and everyone laughs at her, questions why the hell she’s here and pulls some stupid, immature prank on her.

but this isn’t a movie and you don’t think you even have the capacity to show your face there, nor would anyone care that much to target you. 

dismissing him is easier than really considering you hanging out with him outside of this library. seeing him in a different setting and allowing him to see a different side of you.

not you looking at him pleadingly, your eyes moving to the paper in front of him as you ask him to do the next question.

“i’ll do it if you come tomorrow night,” he says, a sigh leaving your mouth as you look at him in frustration.

“yeonjun...”

because if there’s another thing you’ve learned about yeonjun, it’s that he knows you have trouble saying no to him. it could because he sees the naivety in you, seeing something good in him at times and thinking you’ll really be able to help him.

but maybe he hopes you can help him, too. be a person he can lean on and know 100% is gonna be there for him. 

“c’mon, y/n, don’t you wanna have a little fun?”

“i don’t think i’d find it fun,” you mutter honestly, a pout forming on your lips that has him swearing he’s never wanted to kiss someone as much as he wants to kiss you in this moment.

just brush his lips gently against yours, hear the little sounds and see your reactions that he knows will be the best thing he’s ever had. hold your waist and feel your skin against his that while it’s juvenile to him would be so much to you. 

“you don’t know until you try, y/n,” he mutters lowly, looking up at him and seeing his gaze is, as usual, unrelenting. “have you ever been to a party before?”

of course you’ve been to parties before; birthday parties, graduation parties, wedding parties - but you’ve never been to a high school house party. 

and are you about to tell him that? absolutely not. 

“of course i have,” you mumble, a smirk on his lips because he can tell by the way you avert eye contact that you’re lying. “but it’s just... especially with kids from school who i don’t know? i don’t think it’d be fun, yeonjun.”

“but i’d be there?” he whines, something very uncharacteristic of someone who is known to be a bad boy. “isn’t that fun enough?”

you let out a groan as you frown again, tapping the notebook in front of you lightly as you meet his close gaze. 

“your test is next week, yeonjun. can you please focus on that right now?” 

it’s not until the next session that he thinks to use that to his advantage, supposing he can stand one more party without your presence as he smiles over at you. 

“let’s make a deal, angel.”

you know when he calls you that that you’re not about to talk about school or his test, looking over at him with a raised eyebrow. 

“if i get 100 on my test next week, you come to one of soobin’s party.”

you have to suppress a groan at the way he’s not letting up on this damn party, biting down on your lip as you do your best to give him a serious look.

“you should get the 100 because you want to, not because you’re trying to-”

his finger on your lips is the next thing you’re only able to focus on.

not the pounding of your heart or increasing anxiety at the thought of a party or  the fact that there’s more people in the library than usual today. 

you’re only aware of him touching you, a quiet “sh,” leaving his mouth that has your stomach fluttering far more than you care to admit. 

he meets your wide-eyed gaze and smirks at the look on your face. his finger presses down on your bottom lip gently, dragging it slowly and watching as it pops back up. 

there’s an almost pained look in his eyes that you can’t make out, his eyes never moving from your lips before meeting your gaze again. 

“i want a lot of things, y/n,” he says, his voice deep and gruff and making your heart pound even more as he looks to your mouth again. 

you feel your lower stomach swoop at the way he bites down on his bottom lip, his other hand ghosting over to rest of your knee. 

your uniform skirt comes just above your knees, becoming higher when you sit and perfectly exposing your tight covered legs. his large hand rests on your knee like it completely belongs there, like he’s gonna dare anyone to tell him it doesn’t belong there and to take his hands off you.  

“things i probably shouldn’t tell you yet so your pretty little face doesn’t become beat red,” he mumbles in your ear, his warm breath fanning onto your skin and making a shaky, embarrassing sigh leave your mouth.  

but just him realizing that makes your cheeks flush. everything about his closeness and his words and the way he’s just saying these things to you right in the middle of the library. 

the way his hand is slipping inside of your knee, fingers resting on the inside of your thigh that has some dirty, repressed part of you desperate to spread your legs just a little bit more for him.

feel more of his skin on you and heighten the feeling building in your lower half. 

“but i can assure you, none of them are an on my test. but if that means getting you to spend time with me outside of this fucking hellhole, i’m gonna do it.”

just as fast as his hand was on your thigh, it’s gone and cupping your face. holding on to your jaw as he makes you look at him and has a look of softness and amusement but also darkness and arousal. 

it probably has every bit to do with the fact you let out a tiny squeal when he did so, your eyes widening and legs now spreading apart ever so slightly. 

“do you understand now?” 

you should have the power here being his tutor but you don’t. you’re the cat and he’s the mouse, you’re the prey and he’s the predator and you’re not about to do anything to stop it. 

“ye-yes yeonjun,” you say, a groan almost leaving his mouth at you how compliant you are already. 

and it’s that reaction right there that has him skipping the party on friday and spending his weekend doing something he never thought he’d do his senior year - making flashcards and studying his ass off. 

you remember being incredibly proud when, two weeks later, yeonjun came to your session with his graded test paper in hand. 

he looked happy and accomplished and ready to take on the world, a warm feeling blooming in your chest at the look on his face.

“how’d you do?” you smiled up at him, your eyes soft and expression excited.

when he flipped the test over to reveal his 100% test, your first instinct was to raise your hand for a high five. it’s what you always did with the younger kids, praising them and sharing their excitement over a test that they worked incredibly hard on.

so when you did the same thing to him, quickly realizing he’s not one of your 7th grade students but an absurdly attractive man, your cheeks flushed and you stuttered out a “sorry.”

but he only chuckled lightly and high-fived you immediately, lacing your fingers from across the table before you could pull away. the action caught you off guard more than your nerdy high-five, eyes looking down to your conjoined hands before you gave him an incredulous look.

“what are you doing?” you squeak out, fearing that your hand’s about to get clammy and your heart may explode.

“don’t tell me you don’t remember our deal?”

you realized before you even entered soobin’s house that you made a grave mistake. 

music was pounding through the open windows of the house and a few people were littered across the lawn. a drunken couple sloppily making out while another one fought about someone dancing with a stranger all before ten p.m.

you truly intended on never coming, telling yeonjun you seriously could not go through with this and had to flake out on your deal. 

but he’d been so proud of his test. not just because it meant you were coming but because it showed him he was actually capable - or at least, that was the story he told you.

and whether you were silly and naive to believe him was on you since now, you’re walking into a party looking like someone’s holding a weapon to your back. 

“so i’ll see you tonight, right?” 

you were still hesitant even during 7th period this afternoon, looking at yeonjun with a pained expression. 

“yeonjun... i really don’t know if i can do it.”

“why not? i’m gonna be there, just for you.”

you swallow down a bold, sassy remark that he’s gonna be there anyway, probably to remind your fluttering heart not to think too much into his comment. 

but is him being there enough to make you go? or is that scaring you more? seeing him outside of school, around his friends, in an environment where he can be even more bold and daring. 

after all, being in the school library didn’t stop him from creeping his hand up your inner thigh.

“i don’t just wanna follow you around all night and bother you like a lost puppy,” you whine quietly, knowing this was part of the deal but seeing just how impossible it is. 

“how could you think you’d bother me?” he asks, his head cocked to the side just as the bell ringing interrupts you. 

you let out a sigh as you stand to gather your books. you can feel his watchful eyes on you, attempting to ignore it as you silently get ready to go to next period. 

he mistakes you walking away from the table to throw out a stray sheet of paper as you leaving, quickly rising from his feet and pulling you back into him. your body collides with his before he presses you against the table, the library nearly empty as the loud chatter of students can be heard from the hallways. 

“were you gonna leave without answering me?”

his voice is deep and has a certain dominating darkness behind it, your eyes raising to his just in time to see him cock an eyebrow up. 

“i... i was gonna throw this out,” you answer dumbly, raising the crumpled up paper behind your back. 

he hums thoughtfully before taking it from your hand, crumbling it up and tossing it in the nearest garbage can. he misses but makes no attempt to pick it up, keeping you pinned between him and the table with no qualms about it. 

“you missed,” you point out obviously. 

a smirk crosses his lips as he lets out a hum, bringing his hand up to smooth out a piece of your hair. 

“i’m gonna ask again,” he mumbles lowly in your ear, his large body and deep voice quickly making your breaths quicken. 

“how could you think you’d bother me when i spent my entire weekend studying for that test?” he asks, his hands snaking down your body before gently resting onto your hips. 

him pulling you closer causes another shaky sigh to leave you, your low, warning mumble of his name only making him smirk. he shouldn’t like this so much, how you sound so sweet and flustered and are allowing him have you like this. 

“that was all for you, angel. not for me or the teacher or my parents or anyone else. just you. because i wanna hang out with you.”

you swallow the nervous lump in your throat as you raise your eyes to meet his, the playfulness that was in them turning the slightest bit dark. something in them making you lick over your lips as you try to calm your racing heart.

“you won’t even know when i’m there. how am i gonna find you?”

it’s the worst excuse you could have ever thought of but you’re not surprised since yeonjun was pressed against your body and breathing down your neck the way he was. 

he chuckled lowly like he also knew it was the worst excuse you could’ve thought of, taking your phone from the table. he slides it open and looks to you, his eyebrow raised when you just continue to stare at him blankly. 

then you remember, like every other teenager in the world, you have a lock on your phone.

“0319.”

he smirks at how easily you give it up, tapping a few buttons on the screen before handing it back to you.

“i put my number in there. text me when you’re there, 

so even with a pit in your stomach and anxiety coursing through your veins, you go to his new contact name and type out “i’m here.”

you’re faintly aware of the fighting couple’s voices growing louder, his deep groans mixed with her higher pitched whines causing you to look over. 

“i saw you touch her waist!” the girl yelps, her hands on her hips with a very obvious look of distaste. “so obviously you didn’t mind! maybe you should dance with her the rest of the night!”

“maybe i will, since you’re so god damn annoying,” he yells back, your lips falling into a frown. 

the girl meets your gaze and it’s then you recognize her as a girl in your grade. she’s from the popular group but is one of the nicer ones, always smiling politely at other students and listening to teachers during their lessons. 

she almost looks embarrassed to be caught in this scenario, a broken smile crossing her face before her boyfriend notices your gaze; you don’t recognize him, so you think he must be in yeonjun’s grade. 

“what the fuck are you looking at?”

your cheeks flush as you immediately snap your head away, quickly becoming scared and uncomfortable. you can hear her chastising him but just want to be away as soon as possible, the prospect of this drunk man cursing at you somehow worse than a house full of strangers.

yeonjun hasn’t answered your text but you still take a deep breath as you walk toward the front door, immediately hit with the scent of alcohol, b.o. and weed. there’s loud music blaring from the speakers and making the house vibrate, bodies littered throughout the house as they all talk loudly and dance.

your eyes scan the room for his pink hair, stomach sinking when you see no sign of him. 

is he even here yet? he told you he was coming at nine but could he be running late? or did he forget entirely, ignore your text as a joke and now you have to-

“hey. how do i know you?” 

the first thing you see is purple hair and you’re immediately thrown back into the crowded cafeteria all those months ago. when you so boldly went up to yeonjun with tears in your eyes and he was quick to pull you away. 

you remember the boy in front of you asking who you were, the same curiosity in his eyes now as you stand in his house looking extremely uncomfortable and out of place. 

“i... my name’s y/n,” you begin quietly, the boy barely able to hear you over the music and loud chatter. “i had to talk to yeonjun during lunch once so i went up to your table and-”

“well shit, so you’re her.”

there’s a smirk on his face and gleam in his eye, like he knows something you don’t. you cock your head to the side in confusion, watching as his smirk widens and he nods his head approvingly. 

“his tutor, right? he told me about you.”

“oh... yeah,” you say quietly, because yeah, that would make sense - his friends probably wonder where he goes during his free period now; there’s a few beats of awkward silence before he speaks up again.

“so what are you doing here?”

your cheeks flush and you wish you could blame the stuffiness of his house, looking to him as you stutter out that yeonjun invited you. 

“did he now,” he hums, his eyes roaming your face and stopping on your cheeks. he doesn’t know what exactly yeonjun wants from a girl like you but he has to be honest in saying he sees the appeal. 

“follow me then, sweetheart. you want a drink?”

you shake your head before following behind him, making eye contact with one too many intimidating boys and girls before landing on your feet. everyone’s in pretty heeled boots and crop tops, dancing and singing and grinding like they don’t have any cares in the world. 

like they’re not terrified and dreading being here, even with the knowledge that the attractive boy they may or may not have developed a crush on is lingering  around.

“oh, yeonjunnie,” you hear soonbin whine sarcastically, your eyes shooting up just in time to see his familiar black attire. his pink hair is poking out of his black beanie, the chain around his neck hanging low as he turns to look at his friend. 

“i found someone for you,” the boy says before yeonjun can respond, bringing you around to the front. 

you’re in the middle of both boys who tower over you and you’re not sure if you’ve ever felt more threatened; especially because when yeonjun looks at you, you’d think he didn’t know your name. 

because he doesn’t give you a hi or a smile or even a flicker of recognition in his gaze.

he looks at you and simply says, “well, shit, i didn’t think you’d actually come,” with such a handsomely conniving smirk, you’re not sure what to think in that moment. 

because it seems as if all your silly, irrational fears are coming true in this moment. very much like the movies you’ve seen and scenarios you’ve pictured where you’re humiliated at a party or by the popular boy. 

but his smile and his words seemed so genuine. he’s seemed so genuine getting to know you these past few months, how could he have faked it so well? 

the way your face drops and cheeks warm cause his heart to break a little, still all too aware of the questioning eyes and lingering looks thrown your way. 

“didn’t you invite her?” soobin questions, looking between you and him and noting how embarrassed you look.

“i did,” is all yeonjun responds. no rhyme or reason or answer as to why he did. just that he did. so it could very well be a joke. 

“well then, welcome, y/n,” soobin responds, reaching his hand out to you. “i’m soobin, in case we weren’t formally introduced.”

you give him a tight smile, yeonjun’s piercing gaze on yours as you take soobin’s large hand in yours. 

“nice to meet you.”

your voice is soft and shaky and brings more heat to your cheeks, wanting to die when soobin rips up one of his friends for you to sit on the couch.

“i don’t mind standing,” you insist, shaking your head and offering a small smile to the other boy.

“no, no, pretty girls shouldn’t stand,” soobin says with a smirk, catching the way yeonjun’s eyes roll and jaw clenches; it all goes unnoticed to you, though, too busy sitting down and looking at your hands nervously folded into one another.

“so y/n,” soobin says, sitting down across from you and leaning forward the same way yeonjun does during his tutoring sessions. “what’s it like to tutor this idiot?”

his words are laced with affection, as are his actions as he ruffles yeonjun’s beanie playfully, but they still make you frown. still make you wanna defend him in front of others and ensure that he’s not an idiot. 

“he’s great actually,” you say softly, lips pulled up in a soft smile. “very smart and learns fast. definitely not an idiot.”

you look to the boy to see him staring blankly at you, heart sinking in your chest; you’re becoming increasingly uncomfortable in this environment and a big part of it as to do with his attitude. 

you weren’t expecting him to be overly excited, kiss your feet upon seeing you arrive or proclaim an irrational excitement. but it kind of seems as if, right now, he could care less that you’re here.

“ahh, that’s cool then,” soobin smiles. “you’re a year younger than us, right?” 

you can only hum a small “mhm,” yeonjun’s gaze burning into your face causing you to look at him. 

it’s the same soft, wide-eyed look you give him during your sessions but right now, it’s making him feel far too unsettled. like people seeing him with you are gonna show them a different side to him he has yet to acknowledge. 

“why’d you decide to come?” he asks, not being able to stop the words; he already knows the answer, he basically begged you too. 

and because you’ve been nothing but sweet and soft to him, he’s not surprised when you don’t throw it in his face that he’s the one who enforced this. that he studied for nights to pass that test so you’d feel inclined to come. 

“i thought it’d be fun,” you say sweetly, i thought we’d be able to have fun outside of school like you claimed to have wanted. “i don’t really come to parties a lot.”

“i can’t imagine why, you seem really sweet and funny,” soobin says, a flirty smile on his face that makes a blush creep up on your cheeks; he’s so bold and confident, you don’t know both of them do it. “you should come to more.”

seeing that shade of pink on your cheeks from someone else angers yeonjun more than he cares to admit, throwing his friend a dirty look before growling at him to shut up. 

“why? she’s sweet, isn’t she? maybe i need to be tutored too,” soobin says, throwing a smile your way as he plops down in the spot next to you. “what periods are you free? maybe we can go out for lunch and have a session.”

“i... i’m not allowed to leave for lunch.”

that’s a school rule - only seniors are allowed to leave for lunch. but with the way soobin laughs and yeonjun hold back a smirk, the other people littered around also letting out soft chuckles, it appears that’s something not many people follow. 

“you can with me,” soobin assures, patting your knee softly as he sends another charming smile your way. “i’ll make sure you don’t get in trouble.”

you smile in an effort to downplay your embarrassment and discomfort, an annoyed sigh leaving yeonjun as he rises from his seat. he looks even more big and broad surrounded by these people for some reason, in his element where he fits in like a glove.

it’s even more evident that you don’t fit in here - at least in the library, that’s a place you belong. the quiet, the smell of books, the solidarity, a keen sense of-

“i’m getting another drink.”

yeonjun’s words are short and deep as he quickly gets up, hauling ass to the kitchen before anyone can even respond to him. his friend must see the look on your face too, a small pout on your lips that has the boy frowning next to you.

“don’t worry about him, he’s grouchy tonight,” soonbin says reassuringly, wrapping his arm around you affectionately. “some girl stood him up.”

the first thing you feel is a blow to your chest, an unfamiliar pain right in the center as you register soobin’s words; he begged you to come tonight but was waiting for another girl.

probably one of the many college girls, who are prettier and funnier and more charismatic than you.

so, really, you can’t be surprised. you were silly to think he liked you in the way you thought, in the way you’ve come to discover you like him because he makes you smile and laugh and feel warm inside.

but even so, you’re hurt.

you’re hurt and embarrassed and feel humiliated even though no one knows the real reason you came here and stepped way out of your comfort zone. thank god for that, you think, because it’d be even more horrible if people knew you came for yeonjun, all while he was waiting for someone else.

“oh,” you manage to squeak out, a soft look on your face despite the pain and embarrassment inside of you. “that’s too bad.”

“yeah,” soobin says, looking at you with sympathetic eyes you know you can’t trust. “he’ll be good, though.”

you bet he will, you think, because that’s just who choi yeonjun is. he doesn’t care who he strings along or makes believe is special - he’s gonna do what he wants when he wants it with no regard for how it effects other.

even a sweet little meek tutor he was able to get under his thumb the first day he met her.

when yeonjun returns, he can tell immediately that something is wrong with you. your hands are clasped together and you’re biting the inside of your cheek, fiddling nervously as you listen in on the conversation around you.

you meet his gaze and he’s quick to look away, one because he got caught and two because he doesn’t know if he can handle the look in your eye right now.

you’re always almost about to make him crack, break down into being someone worthy of you, and he doesn’t wanna do that tonight. doesn’t wanna show everyone here that, if he wants to, he can be a worthy person.

you’re a second away from breaking before soobin asks if you wanna dance, a tight smile on your face as you shake your head.

“i... i’m actually gonna go outside for a sec,” you say, knowing full well you’re gonna book it to your car and never return. “it’s hot in here. i need some air.”

“there’s plenty of air in here, angel,” soobin remarks, your eyes widening at the term.

it sounds different coming from his mouth, not as deep and melodic and it doesn’t let off a bunch of butterflies in your stomach. you’re too busy giggling softly as you shake your head that you don’t hear the deep, low noise of distaste leave yeonjun’s mouth.

you only see him grab soobin’s arm when he tries to get up to follow you, a lowly growled “let her go,” that makes your eyebrows pull together; you don’t know if he’s trying to hurt your feelings on purpose but he’s certainly doing it a lot tonight.

it feels like you can finally take a deep breath when you get outside, no one around except the chilly air and starry sky. it makes you feel a bit better, sinking down on the stairs and humming contently when your hands meet the cold concrete.

you passed by the dancing people and laughing, smiley couples inside and felt silly for coming here. silly for thinking yeonjun wanted you in his life without him getting something out of it.

what would he want from you anyway? what could you possibly give him when he’s already had so much better?

tears prick your eyes and you bury your face in your hands, taking deep calming breaths so the harsh winter air doesn’t feel like it’s burning you.

you avoided boys and feelings like this for so long and with good reason; you’re too sensitive and naive and always try to see the good in people.

you’ll put your feelings aside in order to spare someone else - you saw it in the beginning, pushing down your qualms about lying to the teacher to further appease a boy you found cute.

and when you put it like that, it sounds really fucking stupid. it sounds like, maybe, you’re just-

“didn’t i tell you you’re too pretty to cry over stupid things?”

your first instinct is to turn around when you hear his voice, his tall, dark figure looming behind you. 

you should probably smile shyly or say that you’re not crying but you can only stay silent, turning back around to avoid his intense gaze and your own humiliation. 

the same way he should probably go inside and carry on with his night the way he usually would. drinking and flirting and dancing before he probably brought someone home or into the bathroom. 

when he moves behind you, that’s what you think he’s about to do. 

but then he’s walking around your sitting frame and bending down to you, looking up at you from his crouched position. his hand reaches out to touch your face, forcing it up so you can only stare at him with teary eyes and flushed cheeks.

there’s a frown on his face as he runs his thumb across your cold cheek, his gentle touch a shocking contrast to his harsher appearance. 

“what happened?”

what happened? you think, not used to feeling so snarky and hurt. what happened was that he got your hopes up, was nice to you and invited you and kept making you feel special, just for them to come crashing down.

but then the more you think about it, the silence between you getting longer and longer, the guiltier you feel - because your feelings aren’t his fault.

you taking his looks and kindness and lingering touches for something deeper was a mistake. you know the kind of boy he is and have still been foolish enough to fall for him.

“nothing,” you grumble, a wet, humorless laugh leaving you as you shake your head. “i’m just being silly.”

but you can’t look up from your feet, your eyes roaming the cracks in the concrete, and that’s how he knows you’re lying; that, and because he knows he was being a fucking dick. 

but seeing you in this environment was weird for him. seeing people look at you and look at him, specifically soobin who got it out of him that he might like you, was unfamiliar for him.

the same way this was unfamiliar for you - which is why he wants you to talk to him. 

“what happened, y/n?” he asks, voice a tad bit harsher and deeper as he cranes his neck down. he hears your harsh, nervous intake of breath and resists the urge to reach out and touch you. 

you need to answer him before he can touch you. 

but you never do. not after ten seconds and not after a minute, prompting him to let out a sigh and pop his neck to the side. your face pulls into a grimace at the crack that sounds through the air. 

his cold hand touching your face causes you to jump, your eyes meeting and a lump forming in your throat; his eyes fool you too much and that’s exactly the problem here.

“talk to me, angel, c’mon.”

your eyes start to burn when a harsh wind passes, tears stinging your eyes and coldness rushing over your face. why does he have to keep calling you that? why does his voice have to sound so sincere and why does he have to look at you the way he is right now?

like he cares so much and hopes those tears aren’t because you’re sad.

“there’s nothing to talk about, yeonjun,” you blurt out, anger and humiliation seep into your tone before you can stop it. you let out a sigh as you try to get it together, taking a few calming breaths before shaking your head. 

“just go back inside, okay? i’m going home. t-thank you for inviting me but i-”

“i don’t want you to go.”

he blurts the words so loud and fast, it even sounds a little awkward to your ears. but he sounds and looks almost desperate, your eyebrows pulling together and heart sinking as you take a deep breath.

because you know you can’t stop the next words from tumbling out of your mouth.

“well, it doesn’t seem like you want me here.”

your words are soft and quiet but they still physically pain his chest, his eyes roaming your face as he brings them to your cold cheeks. he wipes under your eye when wetness forms, the cold biting wind rushing around you both. 

“i want you,” he reassures quietly, his voice just as low and gravely as he speaks hushly to you; he thinks it’s the most honest and true thing he’s ever said to someone. “i want you more than you know.”

“then why are you acting like that?” you question sweetly, the pout on your lips nearly making him groan and cover them with his. “you were being... mean. i felt like... you didn’t want me here at all. or didn’t want people to know you invited me.”

your words break his heart but he also knows they’re true, his fingers caressing your face gently. he notices then how freezing and red it is, looking you over and rising from his feet.

you look disappointed that he’s gonna leave, your face falling and eyebrows furrowing before he reaches his hand down to you. 

“let’s talk in my car,” he clarifies, nodding his head toward his vehicle. “it’s freezing out here.”

you bite down on your lip, contemplating it for a few seconds before another harsh gust of wind passes. you let out a sigh as you take his hand, grateful to enter his car the moment you sit down. 

he turns it on and the engine roars to life, his fingers reaching out to turn on your heated seat. 

the next few moments only consist of the car’s engine warming up as you wait for the heat to kick on, you and yeonjun stealing glances back and forth at each other; you both miss the others gaze by a few seconds and if anyone were to be watching, it’d be obvious you both were nervous right now. 

dancing along the line you’re both nervous to cross for entirely different reasons - you because you somehow don’t think he reciprocates those feelings and him because he knows you deserve more. 

but in this moment, he decides he has to be selfish. watching you with a flush in your cheeks and your lip drawn into your mouth.

“i like you, y/n. that’s why i wanted you here,” his voice says, breaking the silence in a way that almost seems more terrifying. “but that’s also why i didn’t... want people knowing.”

your eyebrows pull together and immediately your mind goes to him being embarrassed. embarrassed that you’re younger and quiet and that no one really knows who the hell you are.

he’s infamous and cool and a senior, obviously he should be with someone similiar. like a popular girl in his grade or a college girl or maybe even a the girl who stood him up.

“not because of you, angel, but because of...”

“you?” you interrupt, a snark in your tone neither of you except; but you’ve heard this line one too many times, not expecting to ever ever hear it real life, let alone toward you. 

“it’s not you, it’s me?” you ask, a gentle, faux smile on your face as you shake your head at him. “is that what you’re about to say?”

he clenches his jaw so he doesn’t smirk, resisting the urge to laugh as he looks you over carefully. it’s obvious your smile’s fake because it doesn’t meet your eyes, the teary glint in them every bit sad as they are frustrated. 

but of course, you’re too sweet to treat him as he deserves. 

his hand reaches out to grab your chin, his thumb and pointer finger on either side as he forces your gaze to his. his smirk comes through when he hears your sharp intake of breath, tongue peeking out to lick at his lips. 

“if you let me talk, angel, you’d know what i was about to say,” he hums quietly, his breath fanning into your face at his closeness. it smells of mint and beer, it should probably be gross but surprisingly isn’t.

his words successfully stir you into silence, partially from fear and partially because the look in his eye has caused you to grow warm all over; and once he sees that, he begins to speak again.

“i didn’t want people knowing because i didn’t want anyone fucking with you, y/n. because if they did, i’d have to ruin them and then everyone would see it.”

“see what?” you ask quietly, the air between you thick and buzzing as you hold his gaze. 

hold it so adamantly and intensely, you’re barely able to register him leaning closer. inch by inch by inch, until his lips are pressed against yours and you’re kissing choi yeonjun in the front seat of his car. 

you’re stiff and awkward and don’t really know what to do but it’s fine because he laces his fingers in your hair and pulls you closer. parts your lips with his tongue which causes you to kiss him back with a slow, unsure pace.

but it only causes him to smile, retracting his tongue and keeping it sweet before he pulls back and rests his head on your forehead. 

“why i decided to spend my free period during senior year getting fucking tutored, angel,” he chuckles lowly, his hand running through your hair gently. 

the soft look in his eye causes you to swallow nervously, words caught in your throat as you stare at him wide-eyed.

“i... i thought you... you said it was...” you let out a shaky breath as you try to get your thoughts together, completely unable to remember your conversation from weeks ago. when he cryptically asked you your thoughts about just why he agreed to stop lying to the teacher and do the sessions; 

so instead, your cheeks warm and you’re hit with the reminder that you just had your first kiss with him. and that you were probably absolutely terrible at it. 

“that was my first kiss. i... i’m sorry if it was bad.”

a small smile crosses yeonjun’s face as he shakes his head at you, thumb dragging down your cheek gently to feel the warm, smooth skin of your cheek. 

“it was perfect, angel, you’re perfect.” he mumbles, your eyes widening and heart stuttering as a ball forms in your throat. “so perfect that i thought you stood me up and weren’t coming. so let’s go on date. a real date, this time.”

in the beginning of the school year, you would’ve never imagined your study sessions with yeonjun would be turning into dinner dates; but as you sit in your room and get ready, your heart pounding and palms sweaty, that’s exactly what’s happened. 

it’s the fourth date you guys are going on and you can officially say that you really, really have feelings for yeonjun. you’re still shy and nervous around him but it’s only because he’s more comfortable with you too.

he takes your hand with ease and laces your fingers together that he was meant to do that.

he’ll shamelessly peck a kiss to your lips and deepen it at any given time, your cheeks burning and embarrassed voice telling him to stop when he did it in the middle of the bowling alley last week. 

he’ll watch you and smile at you and just touch you with the softest of intentions, you almost can’t believe this is the bad boy everyone claims is so mean and heartless. 

you say almost because you still don’t do it in school. it’s still a somewhat... secret fondness you have for one another. he’ll play with your fingers under the table during sessions and wink at you in the hallway but that’s about it. 

he’d probably never kiss you in the hallway or cafeteria but you also wouldn’t want that. it would draw way too much attention and probably leave your face with a permanent, embarrassing flush. 

“are you going out?” you hear your mom ask, her head peeking in before a smile brightens her face. “aw, you look beautiful, y/n. yeonjun must be coming soon.”

the topic of dating had been undeniably embarrassing with your parents, mostly because they couldn’t believe you were showing an interest. but they welcomed yeonjun with open arms, insisting to meet him at the front door to ensure he was a nice boy.

and oh had he really showed you just how charming he could be. 

“mom,” you whine in embarrassment, her laugh echoing in your room as he throws her arms up defensively. 

“you guys be careful. it’s supposed to rain soon.”

you nod your head as you finish getting ready, smoothing over your hair once more before your phone vibrates against your desk. he texted you that he was on his way with a smiley face and heart, sending one back before looking at yourself in the mirror. 

you don’t know what the hell he sees you or why he likes you but you know if you dwell on it, you’ll talk yourself out of everything. convince yourself that this is all a joke and he’s gonna turn around and say he pities you. 

even though, when you brought this up to him, he was quick to calm those worries. 

“c-can i ask you something, yeonjun?”

you were walking home from the movies with your hands intertwined.

the cold, harsh winter had blossomed into spring, the night air growing less frigid; there was a still a bit of a chill but it was nothing a jacket and yeonjun’s warm body couldn’t fix.

“of course, angel,” he mumbles lowly, a small smile on his face as you stop in your tracks. he’s quick to follow, eyebrow raising and body turning so he can look down at you. 

he cocks his head to the side when you don’t speak for a few seconds, his lips falling into a pout as his hand tightens in yours.

“you okay?” he asks quietly, thumb tracing small circles into your skin. 

you lick over your lips nervously, feeling silly for the need to ask this question but it’s one you can’t help. it wracks your mind over and over again and it feels like you’re about to-

“why do you like me?” you blurt out, unaware you even said the words until you notice yeonjun’s face morph into one of surprise. 

his mouth opens and closes for a moment, brows pulled together as he tries to make sense of your words.

“i mean, what’s not to like?” he asks softly, taking you by the hips and pulling you closer to him. 

you’re in the middle of the sidewalk but there’s no one around, the sky dark and streets desolate as you both meet each others gazes - yours full of doubt and his full of confusion. 

“i... i don’t know,” you mumble sheepishly, looking down at your intertwined hands. “i just... it doesn’t really make sense.”

“why? because i’m older? because you’re smart and i’m not?” he teases, your panicked eyes immediately meeting his.

“no! more like the exact opposite,” you clarify as you shake your head. “because you’re popular and attractive and charming and i’m just.... not.”

his eyes roam your face and his heart sinks when he sees the doubt and nerves continue to grow. how you really feel this way about yourself and are pondering the idea that someone like him would want someone like you, when really, it should be the opposite. 

“y/n, i’m lucky that you’re settling for me,” the pink-haired boy laughs out, squeezing your hips reassuringly. “you’re good and sweet and so fucking beautiful. i wanted you the second i saw you, you know, but knew i shouldn’t.”

your eyes widen at his words, shock behind them that has a laugh bubbling from his chest. 

“in lunch. i noticed you the first day and thought you were an angel,” he says, the nickname he always calls you particularly getting the butterflies going tonight. 

“i could tell that you were good. you just have this.. aura, y/n, and i knew that i would taint it. i knew you deserved someone way better. because i’m not good like you.”

"yes you are,” you respond immediately, a frown appearing on your face as you shake your head. “you pretend not to be, but you are, yeonjun. i can see it.”

“you can see it because i wanna be good around you, baby. i wanna be someone good for you.”

tears prick your eyes as a lump forms in your throat, overwhelmed and unsure of how to respond to that. he smiles softly as he takes in your face, leaning forward to press his lips against your forehead. 

he inhales your sweet, vanilla smell while you take in his cologne and faint scent of cigarettes, swallowing down the lump and praying you don’t burst into tears on the spot. 

“don’t doubt yourself, angel,” yeonjun mumbles against your head, puling you closer until your flush against his warm, broad body. “i’m the one who got lucky here.” 

even though it meant wasting away in the fucking library. 

“the library isn’t that bad, yeonjun,” you whine ten minutes later in his car, heat blasting and music low as he drives to the restaurant. one hand’s on the steering wheel while the other’s laced with yours, your body turned in his black leather seat to look over and chastise him. 

he confessed to you that your sessions were the first time he’d ever stepped foot in that library; he hadn’t even been positive that school had a library until he walked through the door that day. 

“it smells like dust and the librarian’s a bitch.”

“she is not!” you squeal, smacking his arm lightly as you throw him a chastising look. “she’s just a little... misunderstood. people don’t respect her space.”

even you can admit sometimes she does go a little overboard; you saw her once lecture a younger student for a half hour because they mistakenly put a book on the wrong shelf. 

“you’re too nice, baby. maybe even a little biased, since you’re the only one she seems to tolerate.”

“probably because i’m there every day,” you tease lightly, your eyes widening playfully before a loud crack of thunder causes you to jump in your seat.

your mom hadn’t been kidding when she said there was gonna be a storm tonight. you’d ran to yeonjun’s car shielding the top of your head, rain pelting down and wind howling as your mom’s “be careful!” got drowned out.

and right now, it only seemed to be getting worse. 

“you scared of thunder?” 

you hear the smirk in yeonjun’s voice and resist the urge to stick your tongue out, not about to admit that, yes, you’re nearly an adult but still terrified of rain and thunder. 

“no, of-of course not,” you grumble, snatching your hand away from his. “it just surprised me.”

yeonjun looks over at you and sees the nervousness all your face, not commenting as he silently snatches your hand back. he intertwines your fingers as he raises your hand to his mouth, pressing his lips against it while he drives through the rain.

it’s getting considerably heavier by every second, his foot pressing off the gas every time he drives past a puddle. 

“i used to be scared of the rain, you know.” 

you look over at him and see him looking peacefully at the road, pink strands of hair hanging in his face. 

“oh, yeah? when you were like five?”

“twelve,” he corrects with a smile, doing his best to distract you from the chaos outside. “i used to wake up crying, sometimes. i know that’s hard to believe now. because i’m so cool and what not.”

“oh please,” you giggle out, the sweet sound filling the car also distracting him from the pounding of rain and crackling of thunder; he’s outgrown his fear of storms but even he can admit this one is a little bit scary right now. 

“what, you don’t think? i’ll have you know-”

the skidding of his tires mixed with your frightened screams is the next thing he hears, a strangled “yeonjun!” in the background as he attempts to take control of his car.

there’s the boom of thunder and lightning and loud blares of horns before everything goes still, his body acting on auto pilot as he safely pulls off on the side of the highway.

his first concern isn’t damage to his car or the heightening storm outside - it’s you in his passenger seat, eyes closed tight and tears on your face. 

“are you okay?” yeonjun’s voice frantically asks, barely able to feel the sensation of his his warm hands on your face. your heart’s pounding and your hands are shaking and for a moment, you thought you were about to die. 

your eyes pop open to meet his and the concern in them only makes your eyes water more, bottom lip trembling as you nod your head. 

but even though you’re nodding he sees you’re not. he sees you trying to catch your breath and your eyes looking back and forth nervously outside.

“hey, hey, angel. it’s okay. i’m here,” he hums lowly, his thumbs running over your face soothingly. “i’m here and you’re okay.”

you attempt to catch and slow your breaths as your eyes never leave his, his only leaving you to quickly assess you for injuries.

“i know that was scary. i’m sorry. i should’ve been more careful.”

“it wasn’t your fault,” you squeak out, swallowing the knot in your throat as you shake your head. your eyes roam his and you pout when there’s guilt and sorrow in his eyes, your own hand snaking down to hold his hand. 

“are you okay?”

his eyes soften as he cups your face and brings you to closer to him, a quiet “yes, baby,” leaving his mouth before he places his lips on your forehead.

you breathe in his scent and he breathes in yours, not allowing himself to pull away until he feels you relax under him.

“i’m gonna drive us to my house, okay?” he says, his eyes back on you looking cautious. “we can order food. i just don’t want us driving in this if it’s gonna get worse.”

you nod your head before reaching down to grasp one of his hands tightly, his small smile meeting you before he carefully pulls back onto the highway. 

the storm gets substantially worse as he makes his way to his house, hand grasping yours tightly as he drives slow and steady. 

he’s flooded with relief when he finally pulls in his driveway, running around the passenger side door to help you out. his hand doesn’t leave the small of your back until you’re in his room, a big space with white walls and black furniture that doesn’t surprise you in the slightest.

contrary to most teenage boy’s rooms, his smells really good. like a mix of his cologne, laundry detergent and a distinct smell you’ve just deemed as his natural scent.

it’s comforting and makes you feel at ease, licking over your lips nervously as you realize this is the first time you’ve been in a boy’s room.

“you want anything to drink?”

“i...i’m good,” you say, sitting on his bed as you look around.

there’s no decor on the walls except for a large flat screen tv across from his bed and above his dresser, a pile of clothes off to the side. 

“sorry, i didn’t expect to have anyone over so it’s a little messy.”

you look over at him sitting beside you, a sheepish smile on his face. you think it’s the first time he’s ever sounded somewhat... nervous and out of his comfort zone. 

maybe because he knows you’ve never been in this situation before. 

“it’s okay, i like your room,” you smile, spreading your fingers out across his soft, dark comforter. “it’s very fitting.”

“oh yeah?” he smirks, inching closer to you and making your heart speed up. “and why’s that?”

there’s that dark playfulness you’re so used to seeing swarming behind his eyes, just as teasing as it is intense that makes you hold back a squeak. he quirks his eyebrow as he moves closer, pink tongue peeking out to roll over his lips.

you can’t help when your eyes fall to them, missing the feel of them on yours. 

you two haven’t gone past making out, a clash of tongues and teeth that have you quietly moaning into his mouth. but when your body acts on its own accord, pushing yourself closer to him or grasping at the bottom of his shirt, he always stops you.

“what are you doin’ baby?”

you were in his car after a tutoring session, the parking lot of the school completely deserted. your cheeks flush and you immediately draw your hands back, lowering your head slightly as embarrassment took over. 

“i...i thought that was...don’t you wanna...”

because clothes come off, that’s how it starts - you know that much.

and you can feel how much he wants to go further, the hardness under you that scared you at first now the thing begging you to go further.

you feel wanted and desired and even though you’re scared, you want to go further.

“we don’t have to do anything, baby. this is fine,” he says softly, his hand reaching up to cup your cheek. 

“but i want to,” you mumble, not even sure if he can hear your words because of how quiet you are. 

you know he must though because he draws his fingers under your chin to lift your face, eyes heavy of fondness and arousal making your stomach flutter more. 

your first instinct is to assume he doesn’t want you - why else would he stop you? but you can see in his eyes that he does...right? because it really does look like that.

what other reason would he have to stop you though? maybe he just doesn’t-

“whatever you’re thinking is probably wrong,” yeonjun mutters, tightening his hold on you and bringing you closer to him. “i don’t wanna go further with you while we’re in the car, angel. you deserve more than that.”

“hm?” you hear him hum, ripping you from your memories. 

you look from his lips to his eyes watching you with lust, the beginnings of your nonsense words cut off when he kisses you. 

your heart flutters and stomach swoops immediately, kissing back with an embarrassing amount of fervor. he smirks against your lips as he pulls you on his lap, your arms circling around his shoulders.

his tongue traces your bottom lip before you feel it in your mouth, daringly meeting his back in a way you’d never done before. it causes him to bring his hands to your hips, squeezing and massaging them with his large hands. 

“look at you,” he mutters almost condescendingly, falling back onto his bed and causing you to squeal. you’re holding yourself above him and his eyebrow is quirked, red lips puffy and pink hair messy causing your heart to flutter mercilessly.

“if i didn’t know any better, baby, i’d think you’re real eager tonight.”

you bite down on your lip as you adjust yourself on him, your hips straddling his and brushing over him. your building heat is right under him and it takes everything in you not to moan at just the thought, his hands strong and firm.

and just as you’re about to answer, tell him that, yes, even though you’re not familiar with.... any of this, you’re eager and ready, your stomach growls and ruins the moment.

it causes a smile to light up his face, a deep chuckle leaving him before he flips you over. he’s hovering above you now, no parts of your bodies touching except for his hand a few inches away from your head. 

“or you’re hunger, my mistake, angel,” he says with a smirk, pressing a peck to your nose sweetly. “what do you want?”

you spend the next hour laying in his bed waiting for the pizza, the storm just as wild outside as it was when you were in the car. you bit down on a squeal threatening to leave your mouth every time there was a terrifying boom, your body shimming closer to yeonjun’s.

he smiled against your head and welcomed your body closer, bringing your head to his chest.

“you’re cute,” you hear him mumble, the swooping in your stomach causing you to feel warm.

you look up at him and smile shyly, tucking your head closer into his chest. you have to hide your growing smile when you feel his lips brush your head, deep content hums leaving his chest.

the doorbell ringing rips you two apart, his mumbled “i’ll be right back,’ causing you to sit up. you brush your fingers through your hair as you sit up, looking around his dark room and feeling something brewing in your stomach.

you feel every bit as nervous as you do excited and eager in his room with him right now. 

it’s still scary because you’re new to this. because you’ve never done anything like this before and you know you don’t know what you’re doing. 

but a part of you wants to kiss him on his bed. go further than he’s allowed you to because if he only didn’t want to be with you in the car, this should solve that problem, right?

you’ve never felt as desired and warm as you have with him these past months. no one’s ever looked at you the way he does or have made you feel the way he does. 

you’re usually too scared or uneasy to talk to people or form a connection; but from the moment you met him, you were able to do that. a part of you just felt inclined to help him, be a person that he knows would be there for him even if it meant in the form of helping him study or motivate him.

you never would’ve expected for him to reciprocate your feelings. nor would you have expected to be in this current situation, want and need bubbling in your stomach at the thought of yeonjun doing-

“pizza’s here,” yeonjun says, popping his head through the door holding a box of pizza. 

you smile upon seeing it, your stomach growling at the smell; if he hears it, he doesn’t say anything. just walks over and places the box on his bed, offering you a slice that you take immediately.

“thank you,” you squeak, bringing the food to your mouth.

he watches you for a few seconds, suddenly all too aware of him looking at you. you raise an eyebrow as you chew, a shy look coming over your face that causes him to smile. 

“what?”

“nothing,” he says, shaking his head as he takes out his own slice. “my mom called me and said they can’t come home tonight because of the storm.”

you take the time to chew your food as you take in his words, the fluttering in your stomach a mix of nerves and excitement. 

“oh.”

“yeah...” he hums, his eyes roaming your face; he doesn’t want his next suggestion to make you uncomfortable but he also thinks it would be best. for both of you. 

“and i don’t know if i should drive you home, angel. it’s supposed to get really bad. do you... wanna stay over?”

there’s a lump in your throat for all the reasons there shouldn’t be. 

not because this is your first time sleeping over a boy’s house or the fact that his parents aren’t home. or because you’re gonna have to call your mom and say you’re sleeping over a friend’s house.

or even because you don’t know what to expect tonight.

it’s only there because you know, in a new form of acting on your deeper desires and not suppressing yourself to just being some innocent girl, you wanna get railed.

“i... i guess i can do that,” you say, some nervousness still behind your voice because when it comes down to it, you’re unfamiliar with this situation. 

“well yeah, but do you want to, baby?” he asks with a small smirk, his hand reaching up to toy with your hair. 

his long fingers run through the strands before tucking them behind your ear, his hand slinking down to rest on your neck.

“if you don’t feel comfortable, i’ll take you home later,” he says, thumb running across your skin slowly. breath catches in your throat when he leans closer to you, his lingering scent and broadness causing you to bite down on your lip.

“i just thought it’d be nice to lay with you tonight. or wake up with you.”

“or let us go further since we’re not in the car.” 

you don’t know who’s more shocked by your words but you know you’re definitely more embarrassed, a rampant blush crossing your cheeks as you attempt to hide in his shoulder.

he’s quick to pull you away with a small “tsk,” the smirk on his lips quickly widening despite the soft look in his eyes. 

you bite back the noise threatening to leave your mouth when he wraps his hand around you hair, the slightest of stings ripping through your scalp when he pulls you forward.

“go further?” he asks lowly, his eyes peering down at you only making you feel more warm and flustered. 

words are caught in your mouth and you can’t find it in you to say anything. not only because you’re too embarrassed but you don’t even know what to say.

you know you want more than kissing and that there’s always a building pressure between your legs when he pulls you on his lap. 

you know on more than one occasion, you’ve wanted his hands that’d rest on your hips to go just a little further down. slip in the waistband of your pants and meet the wetness and heat through your underwear.

you’ve wanted to see his pink hair between your legs as you experience getting eaten out of the first time, holding back moans in the crease of your elbow as his tongue explores every inch of you. 

you know you want to look up at him with tears in your eyes and a heaving chest, ask if you can please suck him off because you’ve also never done that before. 

he can see the arousal and lust clouding your eyes the more the silence elapses, his cock quickly hardening as he takes in the sight of you on his bed ready for him to take you. 

it’s just a matter of how and when he’s gonna. how and when you tell him like the good girl he knows you are. 

“how much further are you thinking, angel?” his deep voice finally asks, successfully breaking the silence and building the thick tension. 

you let out a breathy exhale when he pushes you on your back, the knot in your stomach tightening as he looks down at your body. 

“what do you want me to do, huh?” he asks, the smirk and feeling in his chest growing when he sees you start to breathe heavily on his bed. your legs are nearly shaking from the build up in pressure, your tongue licking over your dry lips. 

“i... yeonjun...”

he bites back the groan threatening to leave his mouth at you moaning his name, holding himself above your body as he hand spays out against your stomach. 

“why are you moaning my name baby? i haven’t even done anything.”

“but... but i want you to. so bad.”

your voice is whiny and pathetic but it’s all it takes for him to snap, his hand moving from your stomach to between your legs. 

he can feel the heat and pulse of your pussy and has to suppress his own groan again, completely getting off on the feeling that you, the innocent little tutor he’s been wanting to ruin since he saw you last year, is laid out on his bed and dripping just for him. 

“please, yeonjun,” you whine again, completely out of your mind with lust when you feel his hand on you. 

he bites down on his lip before he starts gently running his hand over you, barely putting any pressure on you. he’s just relishing in the how only that makes you spread your legs immediately, hips bucking up closer to his hand. 

he pulls his hand away and pins your hips to the bed, his face hovering above yours before you can even whine again. 

“be patient, angel. or this isn’t gonna work,” he growls lowly, his thumbs running over your pants gently. 

“i- i’m sorry,” you gasp out, tears pricking your eyes because this feeling is so new and foreign and overwhelming. “i just... i’m so...”

“you’re so what?”

“i want you,” you say immediately, thinking back to your conversation with him outside of soobin’s house. when the words you’re telling him now are the same ones he told you. “i want you more than you know.”

a scoff leaves his mouth when you say that, remembering those words leaving his own mouth that night.

but the difference here is, he thinks, is that you really didn’t know that.

you didn’t know how just sitting there and smiling at him and talking to him so sweetly was making him want you. your soft smiles and vanilla scent and the wide-eyed look you’d always innocently give him.

but he’s aware of how much you want him, in this moment. he can feel it, smell it, see it. he knows just how much you want him because he wants you the same way. 

your pants and underwear are off in one shot, a gasp leaving your mouth when you realize you’re completely bare in front of him. 

he’s quick to look at your face to see if you’re okay, that teary wide-eyed look and teeth sinking in your lip greeting him; another whiney and mumbled “touch me,” leaves your mouth before he can ask.

a smile lights up his face that makes your heart jump even through this all, a teasing look in his eye even through the arousal and painful hardness in his pants.

“say please, angel.”

“please touch me, yeonjun. please.”

his fingers are on your clit right after the words leave you, your mouth hanging open and legs spreading when you’re immediately filed with a sense of some relief. 

“you’re so wet for me, angel. how long have you wanted this, huh?”

you babble out something you can’t even hear through your pounding ears but it must be something good and polite enough because you feel a finger enter you a few seconds later.

he hisses at the tightness around his finger and has to remember to be gentle with you, fingering you slowly and sweetly as he toys at your clit. 

“you’re doing so good, baby. so good for me.”

you cry out a moan that has his fingers moving quicker, curling them just right before you scream out his name; you’ve never ever felt anything like this before.

“yeonjun, oh, my god.”

“i know, baby, it’s okay,” he says, allowing his fingers to work over you and in you for a few seconds before he forces himself to remove them. your head shoots up and the sight almost makes him smile, a frustrated look in your teary eyes that has him cocking his head.

“why did you-”

the fingers just inside you are below your chin, the slickness of his fingers on your skin making you widen your eyes. is that... is he about to make you...

you hold back another moan when you watch him raise his fingers to his own mouth, his eyes rolling back when he tastes you. you don’t know if you’re a little grossed out or even more turned on but you think it must be the latter if the way your legs start to shake again and your lower stomach tightens. 

“you taste so fucking sweet, angel. can i eat your pussy?”

he could tell how scared you were when you first got here, not seeing a hint of that fear now but still needing to check before he pulls you on his face and has his way with you.

“y-yes, please, yeonjun, oh my-”

you can’t even get the words out before his hands are taking off your shirt, removing the straps of your bra and pushing them down until your boobs pop out. 

perky nipples spring into the air and he can’t stop the groan that leaves him, circling his tongue around each of them before he tells you to unhook it. your eyes meet his for just a few seconds before you reach out to take it off, quickly throwing it on the floor before you, without thinking, cover yourself. 

his eyes flash and he immediately snaps out of his trance, placing his hands on your arms but not attempting to move them. 

“what are you doing, angel?”

and it’s at this moment, something as silly as him seeing your chest completely naked, that you’re feeling insecure. 

you know he’s been with girls before this, college girls who definitely have bigger boobs than you and know what they’re doing. girls who are prettier and sexier and don’t blush or whine at the slightest hint of his touch of them. 

“i... i know you’ve been with prettier girls before. an-and i don’t think they’re that nice.”

“angel, i don’t know if i’ve gotten this across enough but you’re the most beautiful girl i’ve ever met,” he says, the sweetest words to ever leave his mouth not even making him blink.

because he needs you to know in this moment that you are. he can’t stand the insecure, fearful look in your eye that he’s not gonna find you desirable because you’re comparing yourself to other people. 

“that’s a lie,” you weakly mumble out, tears stinging your eyes because this is so stupid. now you’re ruining the moment and he’s not gonna wanna do this with you. you’re proving just how inexperienced and unfamiliar you are with-

“i don’t lie.”

your eyebrow raises and he can’t help but smirk, the realization that your whole relationship started off lying to your teacher making him let out a deep chuckle. 

“i mean i don’t lie to you, angel, i would never lie to you,” he says, reaching down to press a long kiss on your lips. it’s the most intimate kiss you’ve ever had with him, mouths parting on one another like you’re trying to get all your worries and reassurances out on one another.

him that you’re just as desirable as he knows you are and you that you really don’t know what you’re doing but you wanna do this with him. 

“you’re beautiful, baby, and if anyone’s not worthy of the other, it’s me.”

his words make your eyebrows pull together, the look in his eye one you’ve never seen before. probably the most vulnerable and honest you’ve seen him look at you. 

“but i’m gonna do my best to be, angel, so please... don’t think that,” he says, pulling your arms away from your chest. 

he feels relief flood through him when you allow him to do say, his head dipping again to place small pecks on your chest before taking another nipple in his mouth. 

he moans around you at the same time you do, throwing your head back against his pillow. your fingers lace through the back of his pink hair and you feel your pussy clenching around nothing, moaning out his name when his tongue carefully and slowly licks around the other neglected one. 

“you also have the sweetest pussy i’ve ever tasted,” he mumbles around your nipple, swirling his tongue around it one more time before grabbing your hips and throwing himself on his back. 

“so sit on my face, angel. now.”

you have no time to feel hesitant or insecure because, one, he pulls you up before you can do anything else and two, you’re far too eager to feel this for the first time. 

his tongue latching onto your clit causes you to moan out his name, trying your best to not buck your hips against his face. but his tongue feels like it’s everywhere, flicking at it your clit and up inside you and quickly making your legs shake around him. 

your hazy eyes look down and you see his own looking up at you, a hot arousal in them as you cover the rest of his face with your body. pink strands stick to his forehead and you bite down on your lip so you don’t scream, your eyes rolling back when he eats you out like a man starved.

he’s moaning against you and pulling you closer to his face, your hips bucking into his mouth as you whine out his name over and over. 

you’re so out of it and dazed with arousal and need that you don’t even think twice when an idea pops into your head. 

you buck your hips a tad harder than usual that he disconnects his mouth from you, about to ask if he hurt you somehow before you flip over on his face. your body leans over his stomach until your mouth is by the tight groin of his sweatpants, clumsily slipping down his boxers until his cock springs free.

it’s hard and red and looks completely neglected, screaming to be relieved by you.

so even though you have no idea what you’re doing, only guided by works of fiction and things you hear in the hallway, you wrap your mouth around the head of his cock.

you hear him growl at your name but only continue to suck him off, your tongue circling around him as your mouth moves up and down. you smile when he moans against your pussy just so moan around his a few seconds later, like he knew you were smiling against him at hearing that noise leave him.

he didn’t think he could get any harder than he already was but you continue to impress him and prove him wrong, his mouth working quicker on you to aid in his growing arousal. 

a loud moan of your name leaves his mouth when you deep throat him, a growled “fuck,” against your wetness that makes you whine against him. 

“i wanna fuck your mouth so badly,” he growls against you, wrapping his tongue around your clit just as you let out a strangled “please.” but he only shakes his head and continues his vigorous assault, sticking two fingers inside you that causes your scream to be muffled around his cock.

“you’re gonna come first, angel. i want you to come on my fucking face.”

and even though he already seemed to know it from the moment he met you, he sees that what he wants from you, he’s always gonna get. 

your lower stomach tightens before a feeling of euphoria consumes you, your legs shaking and hips bucking before an orgasm rips right through you. your head is leant against his head as you try to catch your breath, whining slightly when he pulls you off of him.

he lays you down gently on the bed before placing a kiss to your cheek. 

“you did so good, angel. how do you feel?”

“mmm.. that was the best thing i’ve ever felt.”

a deep laugh leaves him at your sleepy, dazed look, taking his shirt off so he can dab at your wet legs. you wince a little at the sensitivity and he mumbles an apology, laying on his back and opening his arms to you.

“lay with me, baby.”

a small smile crosses your face as you fall into his bare chest, sighing contently with your head resting over his chest. you can hear his heartbeat against your ear and feel his lips against your head, his fingers running over your arm slowly.

you’ve never been more comfortable and at ease than you are in this moment. even with the storm raging outside and the unknown parts of your relationship still coming, you feel happy. 

happy and safe and so stupidly content.  

“angel?”

you look up at him when you hear his voice break the silence, your chin against his chest as you meet his gaze. 

he smiles upon seeing you, his hand coming up to pat down your messy hair. 

“i like you. a lot.”

you bite down on your lip to hide your growing smile, daringly taking the first move to press a sweet peck on his lips.

“i like you, too. a lot, a lot,” you giggle out, the pink on your cheeks making his heart squeeze in his chest. “but i think you already knew that.”

“i was hoping,” he hums lowly, bringing you back into his chest. you smile against him as you inhale his scent, moving your body closer to him until you feel your leg hit a hard, fleshy piece of skin. 

your eyes widen and pulse quickens when you see he’s still hard and aching, the content look on his face completely disregarding it. 

“yeonjun...” you mumble, shamelessly staring at his dick a few inches from your leg. 

he peeks an eye open and sees you staring down at it, a sheepish smile crossing his face; he looks a tad embarrassed and you shouldn’t find it as endearing as you do. 

“sorry. it’ll go down eventually.”

eventually being when he gets up to go to the bathroom and jerks himself off. because there’s no way in hell he’s gonna go flaccid with you all naked and cuddled against him.

“you mean you’re not gonna fuck me?”

his eyes widen and cock twitches when those words leave your mouth, his hand falling to your jaw so you can look at him. his eyes roam your face when he sees the heavy desire building in your wide-eyed gaze, the perfect contrast of sweet and lustful that has him holding back a groan. 

“where did you learn to talk like this?” he hums lowly in your ear. 

you smirk against him before you bring your hand up to his mouth, his eyes searching yours. but you’re only staring back just as intensely, rubbing yourself against his leaking cock laying between you. 

“spit on it, please.”

he can’t even stop his groan from leaving him this time, painfully hard and ready to bust. you learned so fast what he likes and that’s when you’re both polite and eager.

“baby girl,” he moans, bringing his face down to place a messy, dominating kiss on yours. he pulls your mouths apart after allowing his tongue to explore your mouth, a string of spit connecting your lips. 

his eyes fall to your mouth before he’s tipping your head back, your hand clutching onto his shoulder and tightening when, suddenly, he spits in your mouth. 

your eyes widen but he smirks before you can say anything, wordlessly bringing your hand to his mouth and spitting on it as you so requested. you let out a shaky sigh, eyeing him warily before he gives you a nod.

it’s only then that you wrap your hand around his cock, watching as his eyes flutter shut and he leans his head back. 

“there u go, angel,” he hums lowly, your hand twisting over the tip before exploring down. 

he can feel your hesitance and unsureness but it only makes it that much more enjoyable for him, knowing this is the first time you’ve done this - although he does wonder how you knew to spit on it first. 

his words spur you on and you wet your hand again, twisting and turning on every ridge of his cock. his moans of your name cause wetness to gather between your legs, your eyes meeting his to see them right on you.

“please fuck me, yeonjun.”

you didn’t have to ask him twice before he pushed you on your back. he fumbled to take his sweatpants off fully, discarding them on the floor before pulling you toward the end of bed.

you look down at him with furrowed eyebrows before a loud gasp leaves you, his mouth back on your pussy before he slides two fingers in. he preps you again until you’re coming around him, his mouth hot around you while his fingers are curled and relentless.

“p-please, yeonjun. i wanna- feel you.”

“and you will, angel, i promise,” he says, pressing one last kiss to your swollen, wet clit before going up to your face. “you’ve never done this before, right?”

he knows it and you know it but he still needs to ask. needs to know he’s gonna be the first person to take you and ruin you. 

“no,” you immediately respond, shaking your head as tears well up in your eyes. 

he responds by smiling, placing one last long kiss on your mouth before cupping your face gently.

“it might hurt, okay? i’ll go as slow as you need.”

you nod your head as you relax on your back, looking down to see him positioning himself between your legs. he swirls the tip of his dick around your wet clit and opening, watching as your dripping hole tries to suck him in.

“holy fuck,” he growls out, “you’re so wet, baby. it’s gonna feel so fucking good.”

you whine unintelligible words but he knows to just soothe you. bring his hand to your waist and rub slowly as he promises to be in you soon.

the stretch at first in painful and unfamiliar, your face pulled into a grimace despite the deep groan leaving him.

“oh, angel,” he growls lowly, his dark eyes meeting yours to see your face twisted in pain. “are you okay? does it hurt?”

“y-yes, but it’s okay. just... slow,” you say quietly, nodding your head reassuringly. 

he hovers over your face as he inches himself in further and further, your breaths shaky and body tense as the pain worsens. 

“i’m sorry, baby, you’re doing so good.”

you nod your head and he kisses away the tears, a sigh of relief leaving you when he stops moving. he’s still inside you for a few seconds, allowing your tight walls to adjust around him before he starts moving.

it takes a few thrusts for the burning pain to subside, replaced by a full, warm feeling that had you moaning quietly into the air. 

“does it feel good now, baby?” you hear yeonjun ask, his thrusts speeding up as his body lays over you. “do you like my cock in you?”

“y-yes,” you mumble out, throwing your legs around his waist. 

he growls lowly as he starts fucking into you, keeping his pace steady and just hard enough to make you lose your mind; because he doesn’t wanna hurt you but you also feel so good, he can’t help but chase after his orgasm.

“tell me you’re mine.”

“i-i’m yours, yeonjun,” you whimper out, his hand coming down to your clit making you cry out again. “i’m yours. yours, yours, yours,” you repeat dumbly, having no sense of control over yourself as an immense pleasure builds inside you. 

he thrusts into you hitting a certain spot that has a scream leaving your mouth, a sadistic smirk on his face.

“that’s right, angel. you’re mine. you’ve been mine ever since i saw you last year,” he growls lowly, remembering the first time he saw you and knew you were gonna somehow effect him like this. 

“i wanted to ruin you then, baby, because i knew you’d be mine.”

“yeonjun,” you whine, thrusting your hips into him at his words. remembering all the times he caught you staring at him. all the times you’d watch him and thought about how handsome he was.

how someone like him would never want someone like you. 

but he wants you and you want him and it’s still something you can’t quite believe. you know you’re both different but it seems to be something that works, him bringing you out of your comfort zone and you making him wanna be someone better.

“i’m gonna come, angel,” he grunts out, “i’m gonna fucking come. come with me.”

you feel the knot in your stomach unravel before you’re both moaning each other’s names, chests heaving and his breathing harsh as he holds himself lazily above you. 

he drops his head into the crook of your neck, attempting to catch his breath despite the feeling of your post orgasm spazzing around him.

the pounding takes a few seconds to subside, a final moan leaving him before he pulls out of you. 

he’s quick to collapse onto his back, hanging his arm off the bed lazily as he searches for his shirt. 

he cleans you up a few moments later, watching you with a small smile before he pulls you down onto him again.

“how was that?” he mumbles quietly, his eyes closed and head resting atop yours. 

“really good,” you mumble back, your own eyes closed as you attempt to catch your breath. you still feel a little sticky but it’s not something you mind in this moment, your post orgasm daze leaving you content. 

it could be the post orgasm daze making you say the next words that leave your mouth. on such a high of emotions and endorphins and utter contentment that the warm feeling in your chest if confused.

or maybe it’s the months of getting to know the boy beside you who had such a bad reputation. who you were terrified of at first and thought was mean an scary, thought for sure he was gonna find you weird and nerdy.

but you’ve never felt more wanted or desired by another person. no one’s ever looked at you the way he’s looked at you before or made you feel the way he’s made you feel. 

“i... i think i love you, yeonjun.”

love had always scared yeonjun and especially hearing a confession like that after sex - it had always been his worst nightmare and, truthfully, an embarrassing moment.

but he’s never felt as listened to and comforted by someone else ever in his life before. someone who, from the second he met them, trusted him and thought of him to be good and smart and capable. 

he didn’t know why and he didn’t know what he did for you to think of him that way but he knows he’s never gonna take it for granted. because from the second he saw you, he really did know you were gonna be his.

“i think i might love you, too, angel.”

[gotnofucks]

The Claiming of the Sheriff

Kinktober Day 2: Handcuffs

Pairing: dadsbestfriend!Lee Bodecker x soft!dark!Reader

Summary: You wanted him, he wanted you. But he was too honourable and you were too greedy. So you made the choice for both of you.

Words: 1.8k

Warnings: dub-con (bordering on non-con if you squint), forced creampie, implied forced marriage, smut, language, blackmail, implied age gap (no figures mentioned), 18+ ONLY

The station was sparse this time of the day, most officers leaving for their homes or smoking out at the back. Suspects glared at you from their portraits that were mounted on the walls with huge “Most Wanted” signs under them. You knew one of them, he was sweet on you in high school. If your father knew, he’d have a man tail you in fear of your safety. You kept it to yourself.

Knocking softly on the door beside your father’s, you entered before the man inside could answer. He was sitting behind his desk, a hand resting against his generous belly while the other held a report that he was keenly examining. Your eyes swept over the littered candy wrappers on his desk, and you sighed, wondering why he indulged in them when you were willing to offer him your own sweetness.

“Don’t.” He warned as he saw you lock the door behind you, but you did it anyway. You didn’t take orders from him. His eyes narrowed as you closed in on him, climbing over the table and dangling your legs right before him, legs spread in invitation.

“I missed you Sheriff. Why don’t cha walk me home tonight?” You asked, fluttering your lashes at him. The man had proved most resolute against your seduction, and it was as much a bruise to your ego as to your heart. Men weren’t supposed to restrain themselves this way.

Lee glared at you, trying, and failing to keep his eyes from dipping to where you had splayed your legs open to give a view of your clothed center. “We cannot do this. Stop it.”

You didn’t stop. You slipped out of your shoes carelessly and raised your legs on either side of his chair, capturing him in between. He seized up, as if trying to fold in on himself so he didn’t brush against you. You grinned at him, and he grit his teeth in response.

“Your father is behind this wall.” He growled, jerking his head to the wall opposite him. “If not for me, then at least stop for him. What will your daddy think if he saw his little girl here like this?”

There was a stiffness in his shoulders as if his body was at war with himself. Half of him wanted to claim you, touch you. But the other half of him was bound to his best friend’s loyalty, to your father.

“Not so little anymore, hmm?” You teased, playing with your boobs until Lee let out a long-suffering groan. His eyes closed as if to shield himself from the abject torture of watching you do this and not participating. “Look at me Sheriff!”

His eyes snapped open and met yours, widening at the sudden hardness in your voice. You had waited long enough for him to make a move, for him to do something more than give you those looks that make your knees weak or chasing away every guy that sniffed around your skirts. He won’t take you and he wouldn’t let anyone take you either. You hadn’t the time for him to decide what he wanted. This choice was yours to make.

As you held his gaze, you grabbed the heavy handcuffs from his desk and scooted forward so that you could secure each of his wrists to the arms of the chair. He hissed, trying to desist but you shushed him, the look in your eyes something he had never seen before. You were known to be naughty, even flirty, but until now you weren’t known to be scary. But a woman with a wanting quim was scary, she was dangerous. And you had gone beyond.

“You can’t touch me because of my father. I get it.” You whispered in his ear, leaning in so much that your bottom was barely on the table. “But I don’t care about shit like that. I can touch you.”

Fingers caressed the plump flesh of his cheeks and he sucked in a sharp breath, your touch searing through him. The wrinkles were smooth under your hands, his barely there stubble rough and your mouth parted because you couldn’t believe this was happening. He had kept you at bay despite his obvious wanting, and if you knew all you needed to do was handcuff him into submission, you would have done it a long time ago.

The first brush of your mouth against his felt like a lie. Truths weren’t so sweet, and so you kissed him deeper to assure yourself of reality. The Sheriff was under you, his arms struggling in the metal cuffs as you moved your mouth against his. You could taste the chocolate on his tongue, and you wondered if you’d be able to taste yourself there.

He said your name, almost brokenly when you slipped out of your dress and presented him your bare breast. Lust, guilt, greed, a toxic concoction in his eyes. His tongue came out to wet his lips, nose flaring as you were just out of reach. Gently holding his head between your hands, nails scratching at the nape of it, you brought your nipple to his mouth and moaned when it slipped inside the warmth of it.

“You could’ve made me a mother by now.” You scolded, softly. He whined, and you switched your tit until both were glistening with his saliva. You pressed deeper until your flesh suffocated him, until his breath rasped against your skin. “You could have marked me months ago Lee. You have kept me from yourself.”

He coughed once you let him go, colour rising rapidly in his face but not a word of protest from his mouth. Was friendship superior to love? Did he deserve your young and chaste flesh? He deserved your pain, didn’t he, for all the one he caused you?

“Please.” He breathed, unsure of what he begged for. Maybe to relieve him of the sin you were prepared to pull him into, or maybe to unveil what lay hidden between your thighs that made him tremble when he dreamt at night. The choice, he knew was yours. And you pulled down your panties and unbuckled his pant until he was hot and hard in your hands.

“I’ve seen cocks before.” You murmured, kneeling to press a kiss to the weeping slit of his cock. “Boys like to show me theirs. They aren’t pretty things, those limp slugs.”

Your mouth enveloped him and he jerked harshly in the chair, its feet scratching against the floor as you bobbed up and down on his length. Salty, slightly bitter taste on your tongue made you smile. Such a sweet man, with every flavor known to mankind in his body.

“Your cock is beautiful.” You told him, pulling away and looking him in the eye. You had drool on your chin, eyes blown wide with lust and power as your father’s best friend stared at you with incomprehensible desire.

“Why?” Lee asked. Why what? Why were you doing this to him? Why was his dick different? That answer was one and the same. It was him, the man who was haunting your dreams and ruining your days. The man who had sworn to protect you like his own. And you wanted to be his so bad. Not his daughter, but his girl. If he wanted, you’d call him daddy.

Turning around, you positioned him at your core and rubbed him over your slit, hitting against your swollen nub until your body readied itself for his intrusion. His cock was fat, thicker than anything you had put inside you. It will hurt. Good. You wanted it to hurt.

“Stop!” He tried one last time, eyes fixed on the wall opposite him as if he could see your father through it, glaring at you both with a disapproving look. You bent until his head was pressed into your heat, a hitch in your breath.

“Don’t worry Sheriff, you can sit and let me do all the work. No guilt for you because we both know I was the bad girl who lured the honourable Sheriff into her bed. When you go home, you can feel as pure and virginal as you want, and I’ll be the witch who just wouldn’t stop.”

You stifled a painful moan as you sank on him, his own grunt joining you. He was shaking the whole chair with how hard he tried to release himself. But he couldn’t touch you. You wouldn’t allow him to. He could keep his loyalty and you could keep your lust.

Bouncing slowly, almost too slow, you fucked him. Lee’s head was thrown back, his body slacken and stiff as you rode him. Your fingers plucked at your own nipples; head turned over your shoulder to look at his face that contracted with pleasure. His eyes were the darkest shade of blue you had ever seen. You played with your nub, chasing your pleasure as his cock stretched you open with the most delicious pain you ever knew.

“Would you claim me if I were with child?” You questioned and this time you registered genuine anger and fear in his eyes. If you do what you were about to do, there was no going back. You were twisting his arm in the worst way possible, ruining his friendship with your father and reputation in this town.

“Get off! Now!” He barked and your smirked at his desperation. You had your answer. His voice rose, uncaring if someone heard as he tried to buck his hips to throw you off. You went faster, impaling yourself on him rapidly until your butt was but a blur. He cursed as your pussy clenched around him, dripping sweet essence all over his balls. You could hear his struggle to hold off, how hard he clenched his jaw. You squeezed your muscles harder around him until he couldn’t help it anymore, exploding with a growl inside you.

You remained put, feeling him soften inside you. His head was hung in defeat, and he looked at you with accusation. Getting up with a wince, you turned to face him again, dropping once more to your knees so you could lick away the remains of your union. Tucking him, you made him presentable, dressing yourself next as he silently stewed in your betrayal.

“I’ll see you at my house with a marriage proposal soon.” You said and kissed him deep. He could probably taste the both of you on your tongue. “I would say I am sorry, but you know I never lie to you. See you later Sheriff.”

And you undid one of his cuffs and gave him the key while you exited his room with all your poise intact. Your father met you on your way out, waving a greeting. He said he’ll be home soon. You promised dinner would be waiting on the table.