#and no joke it is making me so viscerally upset i wanna just quit just walk

[moonlitsnail]

hm

[deripmaver]

4 5 6 for ALL OF THE CaPri FANFICS

LKSJMDHGVLKSJ ALL OF THEM???

4: What’s your favorite line of dialogue? 5: What part was hardest to write? 6: What makes this fic special or different from all your other fics?

Ink On Paper (tongue fic) 4. lmfaoooooooo there isn't a whole lot of dialogue in this one oop-

Laurent nodded. The wax softened as he pressed his hand into it, erasing his previous message. Soft, warm, melting under his touch. He wrote again, I need someone who is not afraid to read out the insults I make towards the idiots at court. You have been fired, Damianos.

i guess it technically counts lmfao. i just wanted to show laurent post-trauma still able to make jokes and snipe at his husband so it wasnt all doom and gloom 5. i'm not sure exactly what "hardest to write" here means because like... a lot of these fic have serious gore or otherwise upsetting content, but both emotionally and actually writing wise i find that kind of thing actually pretty easy to write hahahaha. i think i got stuck with the chronology and the decision to make it non-linear made it flow a lot better. for the record writing laurent getting raped and then having his tongue cut out was actually very easy to write, i think i got it out in basically one go. #cancelme the more fucked up and intense the easier i find to nyoom through it 6. my first ever fic in the capri fandom!!!! hehehehhehehe <333333 Level Of Concern (plan B fic) 4.

Before Nicaise could say anything, Laurent spat, “Does he know you had your first heat?”

SURPRISE nic was the one who was pregnant the whole time!!!!!!! 5. this one i banged out REALLY quickly so i cant think of anything here 6. capri omegaverse!!!!!!! i wish there was more of this 🥺🥺🥺 Like Me (what if Auguste was also abused fic) 4. ******CW INCEST MENTION CW ABUSE MENTION******

“Your brother’s stuck his dick in every single member of your family,” Auguste spat out, laughing, crying, and so miserable he thought his heart would stop. His voice rose again, and he felt something burst from him as he screamed for the whole world to hear, “Did you know that? Did you, huh papa? Did he fuck you too?”

dude this line is so fucked up lmfao but i enjoyed writing it so much. actually this entire scene where auguste is having his breakdown was really intense to write and im really pleased with how it came out OR

Auguste grabbed him suddenly, looking up into his grief-stricken face desperately. “Please, Laurent,” he pleaded, voice breaking. “Please. Don’t let him end up like me.”

i felt entirely too clever with this line lmfao. i was like ~ooooohhhhh title drop~ im so dumb 5. i just remember this one like. dragged on for some time. i couldnt figure out what to do with it, how to get everything to coalesce around the final reveal about auguste 6. plot twist!!!!!!! plus auguste angst. i really enjoyed this one, i wrote it after watching the movie Spotlight which is one of my all time faves Softly, Gently 4.

“My King has been overexerting himself again, I presume?” Paschal sighed, shaking his head with a fond smile. “When have I ever done that?” Laurent cocked his head to the side, a wry smile on his face.

hehehehe sassy laurent my beloved <33333 5. honestly im just going to skip this one from now on lskjghmvlksjhglkvsjhdl i just get "stuck" sometimes without rhyme or reason and its usually on boring stuff, but then i cant remember later. the hardest part for me is when my dumb fucking adhd brain wont let me focus on writing but once i overcome that its usually pretty smooth sailing 6. horny omegaverse.................... my beloved............... giving men vaginas for horny reasons my beloved......................... Water of Life (birth fic)

“Do you want to hold him?” Erasmus breathed, eyes glassy. The baby cried, Erasmus bouncing him tenderly in those sunkissed arms. He looked apologetic. “Only for a moment, it’s not quite over yet.” A playful smile danced on Erasmus’ lips, and he brushed away a slick, damp curl from the wailing baby’s head. “A head this big, he certainly takes after Exalted.”

a cute, fun lil line in the sea of horrible angst lmfao ORRRRRR

Erasmus knelt before Damen, before Laurent. He said, “Exalted… Can you command his Highness to push?” Damen froze. “Do you mean…?” Erasmus nodded. “Alpha command.” Damen’s expression crumpled. He said, in a voice that shattered Erasmus’ heart, “I can’t. I can’t do that to him.” Erasmus licked his lips. “Exalted, in this state, he can’t push. His contractions are weaker. He’ll-” “I can’t,” Damen cried, clinging to Laurent’s limp body like a lifeline. “He’d… He’d never forgive me.”

damen is so sweet........ he loves laurent so much...... ORRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

He stopped at the doorframe, turning to face Laurent with tears in his eyes, and whispered, “How long does it take, your Highness?” Laurent, shocked enough to respond, hissed, “What?” “I still wake up in the middle of the night thinking of it,” Erasmus said, voice thick in his throat, tears burning at his eyes. “How long until it’s over?”

real sad hours if u up click like. i love erasmus and laurent bonding over their shared trauma <33333333333333333333 laurent and erasmus friendship propaganda 24-fucking-7 bay bee!!!!! 6. unironically this is one of my fav fic ive ever written skdljmfhgvlksjdhflmgkvjshldkjfghvmls call the midwife is one of my favorite shows and writing this made me look at birth as something visceral and possibly horrible and traumatic. i wanna write more fucked up birth scenes, SO MANY MORE. ridley scott knew what he was doing Sandalwood (erasmus/kallias my sweet boys i love u so much) 4.

“I do,” Erasmus breathes, ducking his head, flushed as though embarrassed. “In the gardens, the perfume from the orange trees all around us on those summer nights.” Kallias smiles behind him – Erasmus knows his body so intimately he can feel it in how Kallias’ posture changes, though he can’t see the soft turn of his lips. “The scent was so cloying I thought it would drive me mad. It made me want to kiss you senseless.” Erasmus laughs, breathlessly, imagining the warm heat of Kallias’ mouth against his. “Don’t blame that on the orange trees, dear one.”

beloved..................... im weeping.......... 6. these two make me fuckign CRY ON THE REG I LOVE THEM SO MUCH MY SWEET BOYS YOU DESERVE THE WORLD- Wisps of Smoke******************* (lauguste fic) 4. ***CW EXPLICIT INCEST*** (i mean....... obviously lmfao)

“Call me what I like,” Auguste growled against his ear. “You know what I like.” He did. Laurent did. He knew everything Auguste liked – the slow flick of Laurent’s tongue on the underside of his cock, that tender spot behind his earlobe, the way Laurent’s thighs looked straddled atop him like his horse – and this. “Brother,” Laurent gasped, desperate, “Brother, please, harder. Harder.”

i wanted the incest to be explicitly part of the kink here lmfaoooooo 6. hehehehehehehhehehehhehe lauguste................... i need to write more of u But I Love It (laurent is allergic to latex fic) 4.

“Laurent,” Auguste said, voice high in warning. Laurent braced himself, stiffening visibly. With what seemed to be monumental effort, Auguste continued, “You know, Laurent. I’m proud of you.”

IM A SOFT BITCH OK???????????????? auguste is PROUD of his baby bro for overcoming his sexual trauma and getting that fat dick 6. SLJHVDLMKJDHGVLK PEOPLE FUCKING LOVED THIS FIC i tried to be funny and i think it worked. plus some softe bits thrown in. i also kind of see lots of humor fic where its a no abuse au, but i wanted to write something comedic where the regent still. existed u kno????? anyways hahahahha i dont think i can write anything like this again but im glad y'all liked it Is It Cold In The Water (slice of life fic) 4.

Laurent opens his mouth to say something cheeky, but instead, what comes out is: “Do you think Aimeric had the right idea?” Damen is quiet for so long, gaze serious and framed with his long, dark lashes, that Laurent wonders if he’d spoken aloud at all – and when he’s sure he had, he realizes Damen had remembered Aimeric after all. When he speaks again, the sleep is gone from his voice. “Laurent,” Damen says carefully, as though approaching a spooked horse, “Is something wrong?”

🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 soft,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, 6. ruby likes this fic lskjdvhmflgksfjdhmvglkjsdhflkvgmjhlekjfhdvlgskjfhv im a SIMP- The Devil's Got Nothing On Me (AIMERIC FIC LEGGOOOO) 4. there are lots of lil nuggets in here!!!!

Aimeric blinks, and all he can think is, you knew? He says, "I – I just." "I am a patient man," Guion breathes, "I support everyone in my household. Everyone. But Aimeric, you are truly testing my patience. Your mother came to me in tears, begging me to find you. Look at what you did to her! There was nothing I could say until we found you!" "I'm sorry," Aimeric whispers, looking at Loyse, "I'm-" "Look at me," Guion roars.

this conversation was inspired by a very miserable encounter with my boss lmfao. fuck that guy and fuck guion

The regent, blue eyes sparkling - and Aimeric has never thought eyes could look just like a summer sky until now - says to Guion but really to Aimeric, "I was thinking I could take little Aimeric riding tomorrow. Just the two of us." Loyse says, before Guion can speak, voice trembling with relief, "I think that's a wonderful idea, your Highness."

~dramatic irony~ lmfaoooooooooo. WE know of course that this is a bad thing, but it's always fun to have characters make bad choices that they have no idea are bad. i also did this briefly in "Like Me" with auguste's ex wife taking nicaise to church because she was so overwhelmed at home and he offered to help. of course, the regent is always happy to help out. evil evil evil

"-was worried it might be difficult for him." A soft, lilting laugh. The guards had said the regent was in the library, and then there is Guion, right there with him. Aimeric is suddenly angry, not sure why his father is with the regent, who is his and no one else's. The regent responds, "I daresay it's been perfectly easy. It seems you've done most of the work already."

i wanted to highlight the fact that it was aimeric's neglect that lead him to the regent in the first place. hence "youve done most of the work already" - guion by ignoring and neglecting aimeric created the perfect environment for the regent to sweep in and take advantage. like leaving food out btwn 40-140 F is a perfect breeding ground for bacteria LOL. the books touch on that but i wanted to make it explicit

He is so, so ashamed. It's unbearable, the thought of her kind eyes, the way she cried for him, the way he pushed her away. Before he'd left to join the prince's guard, she had taken his hand, kissed it, and said in a voice fragile as glass, "It's been such a long time since I've seen you smile like that," but in that moment he could think only of the regent's letter warm in his pocket.

6. honestly i know ive sounded super conceited this whole time but i kind of tear up whenever i read through the end of the fic lmfao. aimeric is just so fucking depressing as a character and i love that i really got to explore that in this fic. he really didnt have anyone, did he????? he's like a tragic greek character where you just watch him stumbling towards his inevitable end and it hurts the whole time. its even worse on the reread ANYWAYYYYYYY thats it. thanks so much for the ask anon!!!!!!! feel free to send me more!!!

[cottagecorewhore420]

Zukka Fluff <3

Protective!Sokka, Fluffy Zukka

Just a short drabble of these two lovelies being emotional on main; also, Sokka finds out how Zuko got his scar.

I hope you like it! Please lmk what you think, I’d love to hear!! <3

They were laying out under the stars, Zuko’s head cushioned by Sokka’s chest, laying contendlt as Sokka carded his hands through the elder’s hair.

“It’s hot,” Sokka complained. Not because he was truly bothered, but he wanted to break their (albeit comfortable) silence.

“Do you want me to move, because I can-“

“No!” Sokka held tighter to Zuko, wrapping both arms around him to prevent him from leaving. Zuko laughed, reorienting himself in a new position, accepting the aplogetic ‘please-don’t-leave’ kiss from Sokka with a grin.

“I was just observing, is all.”

“oh.” There was a beat, before Zuko continued. “Well...You’re hot.”

Sokka looked down at Zuko, who was grinning cheekily up at him from his new position of laying with his head on Sokka’s lap.

“Just observing, is all.” The fire lord said flirtatiously, before turning and looking out to the ocean.

Sokka chuckled quietly, so happy that they had made it to the point in their lives that Zuko was happy and  felt safe enough to joke and flirt like he did. It wasn’t suave, by any means, but the attempts at seduction were so Zuko that it was all the better.

Zuko was idly tracing patterns on Sokka’s calves, when he noticed a scar, about three inches long, shining white in the moonlight. It was obviously old, and long-healed, but he hadn’t ever seen it before.

Admittedly, though, they had only been dating for a few months, during which time Zuko had been trying to make reparations to the rest of the world on behalf of his nation and family.

He wanted to know what it was, wanted to know everything there was to know about Sokka, but additionaly, he knew how hurtful it was to always be asked about a scar; how it reduced you to nothing but some messy looking skin tissue.

Sokka had noticed the traced patterns starting to zero in on the old wound though, and unbothered, decided to tell Zuko.

“It’s from a fishing accident when I was a kid.”

Zuko jolted slihghtly, worried that he had somehow made it too obvious he was interested, but Sokka pressed on, obviously still content and not upset at all.

“Me and Katara were going with our dad and Bato to the ice-holes, to go fishing. Me and Katara had one hole, and then Bato and dad had one each. Me and katara were, predictably, arguing back and forth, and we started pushing each other and arguing- we hadn’t caught any fish, and we both were convinced it was the other’s fault. Anyways, I decided I was gonna make my own fishing hole, to prove that it was her fault we weren’t catching any fish. So, I stomped about ten feet south of her, and then realized I needed something to make the hole. So, being the stupid little kid I was, I yelled at Katara to throw me the bone-dagger we use to skin the fish. And, being the stupid little kid Katara was, she threw it. It, uh-,” Sokka sheepishly cleared his throat, before continuing. “It detached from the holder mid-air, and went right through my leg. It slashed my calf really bad, but that’s all that’s left, at this point.”

“Does it hurt?”

“Nah, it’s all healed up now. Besides, I’ve heard scars are sexy. They apparently help pick up cute guys.”

Zuko sat up, quirking his non-scarred brow at Sokka, who laughed and just grabbed Zuko, moving him towards him until they were hugging, stomach to stomach, Zuko in Sokka’s lap.

“I’m just kidding- I really only wanna pick up one guy.”

“Hmmph.” Zuko looked away playfully, ignoring Sokka’s attempts to kiss him. “Is this mystery guy a cute guy?”

“Oh, the cutest.”

“Really?”

“Oh, yeah. He’s got this really hot teen angst, brooding vibe, but once you get to know him he’s a total softie. It’s really quite endearing.”

Zuko’s cheek colored, blush matching his other cheek’s red.

“Well… seems like a lucky guy if he’s managed to catch you.”

“Oh, I’m definitely the lucky one.”

“Yeah?”

Sokka was in Zuko’s face suddenly, breathing in the same air, hot puffs of breath hit Zuko’s lips. Blue eyes met gold, both blown wide with lust.

Leaning forward, centimeters away from his lips, Sokka whispered “yeah.” Before leaning forward, capturing Zuko in a heated kiss, grabbing Zuko’s thighs and moving him higher up on his lap, stabilizing him.

The movement and flippant showing of strength from his insanely hot water-tribe beefcake of a boyfriend made Zuko moan brokenly into the kiss, which just allowed Sokka access to lick into Zuko’s now-opened mouth.

~

They laid there, panting, Zuko completely atop Sokka, his non-scarred ear pressed against Sokka’s chest, listening to the beat of his heart, allowing it to comfort him.

Despite laying fairly-openly on the beach, he hadn’t felt this safe and protected in a long time than when he was here, right in this moment, basking in the afterglow with Sokka.

“I have a scar from a family member too.”

“Yeah, baby?” Sokka’s tone was light; he didn't want to pressure Zuko into sharing his scar’s story. 

Even when Katara had pressured him when they began dating, he had remained firm that if Zuko never wanted to discuss it, it was his own prerogative, and that was fine, too.

“Yeah… I was thirteen, and my uncle had talked the war-room guards into letting me sit in on my first strategy meaning. So, we went in, and this general was talking about how he was going to move an entire division of troops into a suicide-mission, purely as a distraction.”

The night around them was quite, still except for their voices, as if Yue was watching to make sure nothing interrupted them from this obviously-important moment.

Sokka was sickened at the horrifically brutish militia tactics the fire nation used to employ- to willingly sacrifice hundreds of lives, just for a slight strategical advantage? Disgusting.

“I… I didn’t agree, didn’t think that was right. I spoke up, even though Uncle had warned me not to. But I went on and said how reprehensible that was, how those were real people, with families and lives, and a loyalty to our nation. I was quickly rebuked, and in a show of anger, I agreed to an Agni Kai.“

“Oh my god- at 13?!”

“Yes. And I was stupid enough to take the offer.”

“Oh my god- baby, I’m so sorry.” Sokka curled an arm protectively over his boyfriend’s form. Sokka ached for 13-year-old Zuko, scared and desperate to please his father, to please his nation.

“When I got to the arena, and prepared for the Agni Kai, it was revealed to me that I wasn’t going to be fighting the general. Because I had spoken out of turn in the fire lord’s war room, my slight was against the fire lord, not the general.”

“No-“ Sokka gasped, heart clenching at what he suspected was going to come next.

“My father was there, and said he would be who I battled in the Agni Kai for my honor. I- I had no idea it was him I would be fighting. I dropped to my knees, in front of the whole stadium, crying, pleading. I refused to fight my own father, and I told him as his humble and loving son, I refused to do so. I was so sorry, I was so scared.”

Zuko at this point had sat up, staring out at the ocean, legs crossed in a meditative-esque pose, hands on their respective knees. His voice was small, almost drowned out by the gently cresting waves. 

To hear him, Sokka had moved so he was sitting directly behind him, purposefully not touching his boyfriend despite a visceral want to do so. He  knew this was a hard thing for Zuko to discuss, and he also knew physical touch was something his boyfriend struggled with.

“My father… he told me I had brought dishonor to myself, and in punishment held his hand over my eye, and shot a burst of flame into my face. He banished me that night, and Uncle went with me… he said I would only be allowed back, to restore my honor if I brought him the avatar.”

Sokka jumped up, and started aggressively pacing back and forth, parallel to Zuko.

As if pulled from a dream, the thousan yard stare Zuko had adopted broke, looking shocked at the tensed body of his boyfriend.

“Sokka?”

When he didn’t get a response, Zuko worriedly stood up and approached his stony faced boyfriend, shocked to find tears rolling down his dark cheeks.

“Where is he?”

“Wha-“

“Where is Ozai?!”

Zuko was shocked at the aggressive tone of Sokka’s voice. He had never heard him this… feral sounding. And, pushing past the thought that is was insanely (I mean, really, insanely hot), he was worried.

“Why do you need to know where my father-?”

“Don’t call him that, Zuko! That disgusting animal doesn’t deserve any relation to you.” Sokka looked like a mongoose-viper, coiled and ready to strike. His growled words and obvious anger were very confusing to Zuko, who just watched warily. He didn’t think Sokka would hurt him, but he was confused at the anger literally emanating from Sokka in waves.

“Why are you mad?”

“Why am I- Because I am trying to stop myself from building a ship, sailing to mainland, and hunting through every prison cell in the fire nation until I find your deadbeat father.”

“What- why?!”

“Tui and La, Zuko, because that vile excuse for a human had the audacity to lay his hands on you, his own fucking son with such a sick fucking intent- I just. That shit isn’t okay. If this were back home, I would have his fucking head, for doing that. To a- to a kid, Zuko!”

Sokka was crying now, tears illuminated under Yue’s averted gaze.

“Baby, I’m okay.”

“But it’s not okay. I am- I’m so sorry Zuko. The hand that you were dealt was so fucking unfair. I am so sorry, I wish I could protect you from that fucking monster. I just- I want to rip his head off. How dare he-“ Zuko brought his distraught boyfriend into his arms, who slumped down into the smaller framed man.

Sokka’s tears were steadily flowing, soaking Zuko’s bare chest.

“It’s okay, Sokka. I’m sorry I said anything, I-“

“No, please- I’m- God, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t be the one being comforted right now.” He pulled away from Zuko, scrubbing his face with his hand. His form, now fully matured, towerd over Zuko. (Holy shit that’s hot Zuko thought staring at his jutting muscles in the moonlight, before admonishing himself that now was not the time to be horny on the beach.)

“It’s just- the mere thought of someone laying a hand on you, baby, especially with such an evil purpose, it makes my blood boil. I love you so much, Zuko, and I know you probably aren’t ready to say that, which is fine, but I love you so fucking much and all I want is to protect you, and heal you, and save you from-mmhph!” 

Sokka was silenced by Zuko’s fervent kiss, hungrily moving his lips against his boyfriends.

When they both needed air, the pulled apart regretfully, panting in sync.

 “I love you too.”

They fell back into the sand, and back into each others arms, languidly kissing, feeling blessed to be with the other, in their small, personal realm of love and safety.

~

“Iroh.”

“Hello, Sokka. What an unexpected surprise!” The reitred war general regarded his nephew’s boyfriend warmly, if not slightly appraisingly as he stood outside Iroh’s quarters in the palace.

“Is it?”

“Ah, well, perhaps not entirely. My nephew mentioned he has told you the story behind his scar.”

“He did.”

“When he came to me, he seemed very shocked to find your reaction so… visceral. I had to explain to him that anyone who loves him truly and deeply will react much the same. He still has trouble realizing his worth, how his treatment as a child was so flawed. He’s still accepting that the world’s treatment of him wasn’t right, and wasn’t deserved.”

“I… I haven’t felt that kind of anger in a long, long time. Maybe ever.”

“Hmm. That is just the price of love, Sokka.” he mused. Turning his wizened eyes to the younger man, “Now, I’m sure you’ve come to see me for more than a hello, yes?”

“Do you know where Ozai is being kept?”

Iroh regarded the man, studying him, not letting the shock show on his face.

Far from the young child-soldier with traditional face paint on who he first saw many years ago; Sokka had grown so much.

In place of that lanky, pubescent boy, stood now a full-fledged southern water tribe warrior, who had the traditional tattoos, battle scars, and hard-earned wisdom to prove his standing in the world. He had fought for all he had, and he protected what he saw as his.

With a deep sigh, Iroh moved aside from the doorway. “Hmm... this may be a bit longer than I thought. Do come in, Sokka… won’t you play me in a riveting game of Pai Sho?”

[ravenvsfox]

Can you do Jeaneil or Mattneil bc my heart does not have enough rare pair content to go on? Please?

you poor deprived kiddo let me give u some mattneil to keep u warm

SEND ME A SHIP AND I’LL TELL YOU…

who is more likely to hurt the other?

ok here’s the scoop: matt doesn’t know how to hurt someone :/ he was born that way :/ it’s medically proven :// 

Neil on the other hand......... like he doesn’t take care of himself and he doesn’t understand social cues and like. it hurts matt’s heart. he just wants neil whole and happy and neil makes rash decisions and lies/doesn’t let matt in at first and that cuts pretty deep

who is emotionally stronger?

mmmmm hard to say bc they’re both p resilient from the shit they’ve been through but matt’s shit just happens to be more manageable?? like if you put matt in neil’s headspace idk if he could do it. but like in the series, matt is an emotional pillar of strength, neil’s safe harbour etc, he’s fought rlly hard to get the peace of mind that he has 

who is physically stronger?

dude matt could benchpress two neil’s stacked on top of each other....... he can and will carry neil home on his back..... he’s like 7 feet tall

who is more likely to break a bone? 

neeeeeil as always my accident prone kiddaroo. Matt has a bit of trouble organizing his long fuckin limbs sometimes but his centre of balance is good. plus he doesn’t have those pesky yakuza members on his ass

who knows best what to say to upset the other? 

r u srs matt would never in his life purposefully upset neil where would he even start he’d be like ‘uh. neil.. you. uhh-- what is that? ur natural hair colour?? like something that beautiful could occur in nature am i... am i right’

meanwhile neil is an emotionally unstable drama queen who canonically distances himself and flings insults to keep people safe so like. yeah he might dick things up bc he’s in the habit of alienation & doing things alone

who is most likely to apologize first after an argument? 

matt would bc he doesn’t like conflict and he’s very very gentle with neil. he understands neil’s past (and quite frankly doesn��t give a shit about where neil’s from or the laws he’s broken) and he understands that things go south for a reason. neil has bad days that are. rlly bad. and matt’s not perfect but like. he’ll make space for neil to come home to. he’ll make sure the first thing neil hears is sorry and i love you and we’re better than this 

who treats who’s wounds more often? 

please.. who do u think....... 

remember when matt went completely blood-drained pale & furious when neil got hurt? remember when he punched kevin in his face for letting anyone touch neil?? if u don’t think he’d try to hold neil together at the seams idk what to tell you

who is in constant need of comfort? 

neil has nightmares and a multitude of triggers and matt spends a lot of time trying to stand between neil and the rest of the world, just in case. neil tries pretty hard to ignore the bad memories under his skin, but they poke out like splinters and matt happens to be really good with tweezers

who gets more jealous? 

like I think it might actually be neil?? in a weird, nebulous, unidentifiable by even himself kind of way. Matt means so much to him, like. he’s the first person who looked at him and didn’t even try to look away, just accepted him into his family w/o blinking. neil still doesn’t understand romance, and he doesn’t ever think that matt would like ‘cheat’ on him or w/e. but he knows the wriggly feeling when matt can’t be around for whatever reason. he’s jealous of people who have matt’s time and attention tbh bc it feels so amazing when HE has itbut also if a person tries to touch neil matt will be very >:(

who’s most likely to walk out on the other? 

no

who will propose? 

ohohohooo it’s SO matt

he’s always wanted to lock that down tbh he’s the kind of guy that sees you, loves you, plans a life w you in his head every time you laugh

5 years down the line he proposes and neil is like ‘i guess ya w/e anyway when r u gonna transfer to my team i wanna play exy w you’ and matt cries

who has the most difficult parents?

😒 

who initiates hand-holding when they’re out in public? 

matt what a sweetie I bet he tries to hold hands w neil when they’re jogging like... hun that ain’t gonna work but I appreciate the gesture

neil is so blown away by casual intimacy he ends up staring at their linked fingers the whole time they’re walking anywhere and almost running into shit

who comes up for the other all the time? 

matt talks about neil 24/7 soooo

who hogs the blankets? 

here’s the thing,, neil doesn’t even have the opportunity to hog the blankets before matt’s in there tucking him in and holding him close and giving him foot massages and shit

like if neil has an excess of anything it’s bc matt gave it to him

who gets more sad? 

this question is so weird for tfc bc like they all are yo this is a book about mistreated young adults so

like yeah neil struggles more with being okay with his reflection and the way his skin is all fraying and ripped like old fabric at the tender age of 19 and the twisty feeling of having been viscerally relieved by his father’s death and the years of trauma under his belt from a litany of abusers 

but matt has a drug problem that sent his life all over the place like shotgun fire and a parent that didn’t know how to be a parent, and friends that died young and got hurt and taken away and that can be really fucking sad too

who is better at cheering the other up? 

matt can flash a smile and put in a movie and calmly list every single thing that looks bright about neil’s future and it’s amazing how much that helps?? neil cheers matt up by being utterly oblivious about how to cheer him up though. awkward shoulder pats and inappropriately timed kisses and matt’s like :))) thanks u loser

who’s the one that playfully slaps the other all the time after they make silly jokes?

it’s not so much that neil makes silly jokes, but he does say wildly inappropriate things/roasts anyone w a pulse and matt’s reactions are either A) thrilled, laughing, go get ‘em babe B) ‘holy... shit.... can he say that?? can u say that babe?’ C) (gentle slap) ‘can u.. calm down damn’

who is more streetwise?

uhhh neil from the. you know. street. but matt can definitely handle himself, and he spent some time in underground party scenes and trying to like live when his dad was preoccupied so he knows his way around bits and pieces of the real world (andrew would disagree)

who is more wise?

i get the feeling that neil is lowkey smarter than most ppl know?? (distractingly 80% of the shit that comes out of his mouth is exy jargon or insults) he’s capable enough to keep his head down, do some calculations, and survive

matt is smart, and he thrives socially, but he can be a little tiny bit naive sometimes

who’s the shyest? 

like I guess neil bc his true colours are buried under 8 feet of fabrication, and matt’s an upfront lovely guy

who boasts about the other more? 

look. matt loves neil so much. he tells the story of his rising from the ashes of his former life and becoming an exy star like it’s the plot of his favourite movie. he tells everyone about neil being scouted. he tells everyone when he says yes to his proposal. like he’s in line at sobey’s telling the cashier about neil’s talent and his pretty eyes

who sits on who’s lap?

again like.... logistically it’s gotta be neil, and also emotionally it’s gotta be neil

he deserves some lap sitting tbh