#and now im back at that awkward stage where if i date anyone i have to explain we're a package deal exceot now

[narutomaki]

every relationship either lasts forever or fails so like. idk why I'm surprised and upset about another one not lasting forever.

[mixelation]

i wrote some (a)synchronicity :^)

this does feature a conversation about icha icha, because i forgot jiraiya wrote his first book (the non icha icha one that's basically minato RPF, from which naruto got his name) right around kushina's pregnancy (or at least finished it and gave it to minakushi while she was pregnant), and im too lazy to change any of the dialogue. so um. i guess it's a mild au........?

also i did a coin flip on naming minato's teammate kokoha or kotone. kotone won but i did realize kokoha can be written with the kanji for leaf, which seems..... like something ninja would inflict on their children...... HMM

*****

“I– I like girls!”

Minato stared back at Kushina. This was… this was not how he expected asking her out to go. He thought they’d basically already confirmed their mutual affections. 

Kushina’s face was as red as her hair, even as she determinedly and earnestly kept eye contact with him. 

“S-sorry!” she said. “I know… I know I’ve been sort of leading you on. I did think I liked you, you know. But, um, I’ve been trying to imagine actually dating you for the past few months, and…”

Minato was the one to drop his gaze, his cheeks going hot as he stared down at his sandals. 

“Anyway, I realized I don’t like you like that, you know,” Kushina continued. Kushina was never one to back out of awkward situations. That was one of the things he liked about her. “Um, I still like you though. As a friend. Like, I friend-like you a lot, you know.”

“Oh,” Minato mumbled at the ground. “I’m glad.”

“But you’re not…” Kushina trailed off, and Minato mustered up the courage to look at her face again. She was chewing on her bottom lip. “You’re just not a pretty girl, you know?”

“Yeah,” Minato said. “I know.”

They talked. They agreed to stay friends, and Kushina offered to treat him to ramen. They walked to Ichiraku together and joked about talking about pretty girls together in the future. Kushina flicked bean sprouts at him like she usually did and then snatched the naruto fish cake right out of his bowl without asking, just like she always did. 

Minato went home and laid face down on his futon and contemplated his life. 

He’d never been turned down before. He’d never been in love with anyone besides Kushina, but he’d spent most of his teenaged years on the frontlines, and he’d fooled around. He’d never not smiled that smile at someone, man or woman, and had them not follow him back to his tent. 

Why did his first rejection have to be the only one he’d ever really, truly liked…?

And he had a whole month of leave time ahead of him, here in the village, now with nothing to distract him. With the long leave, he’d thought it’d be a good time to finally formally ask Kushina out. They’d both sort of mutually danced around the subject for years, because the war meant they barely ever got to see each other in person, which would have made a romantic relationship hard. But Hiraishin now meant Minato could come home more often, and they'd both turned nineteen that year. It seemed like a good time to move into a more serious stage of their relationship, and Kushina had indicated strong romantic interest the last time he’d been in the village. 

And now… well, he wasn’t sure what he was going to do, long term or short. He did still want to be friends with Kushina, but his heart felt delicate. He didn’t want to see her again so soon. 

He rolled onto his back and stared at the ceiling. He could… read. He didn’t really want to bother Kushina for material from her personal library of Uzumaki scrolls (which was where anything new for him would be), but he could always ask to reread Tobirama’s various fuinjutsu and ninjutsu scrolls. Or… Jiraiya’s new erotica adventure novel sounded kind of fun. 

What is Sensei up to? Minato wondered. He hadn’t seen him in a couple months. 

Then, on a whim, he teleported to him. 

“Fuck,” Jiraiya swore, dropping his field telescope. “Kid, this better be an emergency.”

Minato glanced around his surroundings. No enemies. No ninja in general. There was no one else around, although Minato could hear civilian voices on the other side of the wooden fence Jiraiya had been peering through. The air was damp and smelled slightly sulfuric. A hot spring, but not in Hot Water Country. 

“Are you peeping again?” Minato asked, squinting disapprovingly at Jiraiya. 

“It’s research,” Jiraiya insisted. He toed his telescope and then flipped it into the air with a quick move of his foot. 

Minato snatched it before he could. 

“There’s other ways to do research,” Minato chided. 

Jiraiya crossed his arms. “How do you know? Have you even read my book?”

“Er…” Minato hesitated. It was on his to-do list, okay? “Anyway, have you heard from Dekai or Kotone lately?”

Any attempt to pry Jiraiya from his vices usually ended with him trying harder, but it wasn’t difficult to distract him. They went for beers at a dimly lit local bar. Dekai and Kotone, Minato’s old genin teammates under Jiraiya who were now also in a cycle of unending war-related missions, were doing fine as far as Jiraiya knew. Minato told his sad story of finally asking Kushina out. 

“Likes girls, you say…?” Jiraiya said contemplatively. He shifted, producing a small notebook from his haori. 

“Please don’t take notes on my heartbreak for your porn novel,” Minato complained. 

Jiraiya sighed and the notebook disappeared. Minato decided not to mention that he’d known Kushina had liked girls for years and had even had a few girlfriends; they’d just both thought she also liked men. 

In particular, she’d liked Minato. 

“This sort of thing happens,” Jiraiya said sagely. “You said you were going to try to be friends? That’s good.”

“I don’t know when I’ll be able to look at her without wanting to cry,” Minato admitted. 

“The Yellow Flash? Afraid of a girl?” Jiraiya mocked, waggling his eyebrows. Minato kicked him under the table half-heartedly. “Fear not, my apprentice. Why, even your old sensei has had his heart broken by a beautiful kunoichi…”

Tsunade had turned Jiraiya down five or six times during their overly dramatic youths. Minato did not think this was a very comparable situation, as he was pretty sure Tsunade had never even given a hint of returning Jiraiya’s affections. But his Sensei was a good storyteller, and it did make Minato feel better to know that two ninja could be friends even through war and heartbreak. 

It would hurt, but it wouldn’t be the end of the world. 

“You’ll find someone else,” Jiraiya finally concluded. “When have you ever not been a charmer?”

Minato stared down at his now empty glass. He didn’t know how to articulate to Jiraiya how different being in love versus just thinking someone was attractive felt. Kushina had been… well, she’d really been one in a million. Minato had never found anyone who could really challenge him, physically or mentally, the way she could. He was afraid he never would. 

“If you want a distraction,” Jiraiya said, leaning across the sticky table conspiratorially, a glint in his eye. 

Minato perked up. “Yes?”

“There’s an interesting rumor I’m chasing,” Jiraiya said, voice dropping to a dramatic whisper. “There’s supposedly a fuinjutsu master running around, and no one has any idea who they’re working for or why.”

Minato frowned slightly. “A fuinjutsu master?”

Jiraiya leaned back, waving dismissively as he took another gulp of beer. 

“They’re just rumors,” he said. “Probably it’s just someone with a couple janky seals, and people are impressed because most of the witnesses are civilian or low-ranking shinobi. I’ll know if I actually find a working seal.”

The notebook reappeared, and Jiraiya passed over a sketch of the pieces of a seal he’d found carved into a tree. 

“The bark was hacked away in a rush,” Jiraiya said. “Sloppily done. Not really a ninja’s knifework. Probably civilians covering for them.”

A small piece of the seal had been left behind, which Jiraiya had copied. Minato traced the radical with his fingers. 

“A barrier?” he guessed, and Jiraiya nodded. “Carved into the tree?”

Jiraiya shrugged. “I told you: janky. But it really impressed the locals.”

“I’d bet,” Minato murmured in agreement.

Jiraiya’s lips turned up in a wry smile. 

“Whatever you’re betting, they were even more impressed,” Jiraiya said. “They claim it went up around someone from the Demolitions Corps, and then completely contained his explosion. Guy blew himself up.”

Minato just raised his eyebrows. Jiraiya wiggled his fingers at him. 

“Mastery,” he said, clearly not believing the story. “There was evidence of an explosion, but…”

Jiraiya took another sip of beer, unimpressed. Anyone who could make a barrier would also be able to make an exploding tag or two. It was basic stuff. 

“This isn’t a standard barrier, though,” Minato said. “They must have known what they were doing.”

“Eh,” Jiraiya replied. “Non-masters make modified seals all the time, by copying someone better, or by luck, and that’s only a little piece of it. I’ll make my call when I find a whole one.”

“I guess,” Minato said, and passed the notebook back. “So, when you said you had a distraction for me…?”

Jiraiya waggled his finger at him. 

“Go home and read my amazing new novel first,” he said. “Sleep in. Eat well. Fuck someone pretty who’s not Kushina. You need a break from the battlefield, or you won’t stay sharp. Trust an old timer like Sensei.”

Minato pouted. Jiraiya held up his hand, spreading his fingers. 

“Five days, minimum,” he said. “More, if you need to reread my book ten times. Then you can come bother me about this mystery fuinjutsu user.”

“Fine,” Minato agreed. Then he grinned. “But I’m not holding back in my review if your book is bad.”

Jiraiya’s returning grin showed off all his teeth. “Trust me, kid. You’re going to love it.”

Unfortunately, about this part of their conversation, Jiraiya was right. Minato would love his cheesy book. Jiraiya was also right that Minato would slowly get over his heartbreak. 

He was phenomenally wrong about the mystery fuinjutsu user. 

[hope-urok]

haunted

240317

i notice it is more prominent when i see you. when i don't see you much it still lingers. is that normal?

i don't know if it's because i feel so bad and guilty that it's haunting me. isn't it so dumb that i'm the one that broke it off and then when we tried again i started dating 3 months after? or maybe i'm just living my life? i can't hold myself against getting into a relationship because we weren't in touch. yes we said waiting but we did also say to keep in touch and it didn't happen. this was so long ago and i'm still thinking about it. i can't help these feelings but surely i can identify what sort of feelings at this point but i really don't know.

is it the lack of closure? because we barely talk i barely know anything about his life at the moment? and i want to be friends again, do i? it's not been like this with anyone else. we're better now but i'm still having the same thoughts.

it's so hard for me to act normal around him. this has been our normal for the past few years. it's a cycle. it's a whole 8 seasons. i liked him early on in our friendship when we first met. but he had a gf. after they broke up, i tried to go for it, we went to ball, i was too forward. i got into a relationship. few years later, he starts to have feelings for me and we start dating soon after i got out of that relationship. he moves down to hastings. it doesn't work. we break up. the next year we have camp, i visit him, things reignite but doesn't continue when i go back home. since then it's been business conversations, awkwardness and ignoring.

what im tryna say is we have not acted like proper friends since before we started dating. even then it was a bit confusing. even then I couldn't talk to him much without feeling things. i remember wanting to distance myself because of my feelings. and now it's the same thing.

for whatever reason, it is a lot of effort, not natural, anxiety-inducing to try talk to you or make a conversation. it's easier when it's about youth. but when I see you I go blank. my brain doesn't work. and yes, it probably is because of our history and I'm nervous to talk to you. not that i still have feelings right? i barely know you now. how can i say i still like you.

to be frank... i miss you. i am jealous of people who can talk to you casually and normally. i want to be one of your closest friends again. i want to know what goes on in your life on a regular basis. but, if you are seeing someone, I don't want to know. at this stage, I could not attend your wedding. there's also the fact that you were in aus during valentines so that's a big tell imo. we'll see how we are in a few years, hopefully, I can get to a place where we can have a pure friendship and I'll be happy for you when you do date or enter the seminary haha.

i do have a feeling that a conversation over coffee would fix this. i guess I'm not mature enough right now. some day. is it pride? a part of me feels it would be selfish to ask to talk if it's just to say I'm sorry and talk things out. it's also been so so long...

there are indicators that i still have feelings. did i not truly heal? the regular dreams i have of you have to stop. every song along the lines of 'the one that got away' hurts. and there must be a reason that love, rosie and the hows of us are my comfort movies. these all feed my delusions.

i never thought that when we separated that we weren't meant to be. i always thought we'd come back to each other. but we're intertwined in each other's lives so much lately and things are still weird so i don't know what that means.

i have to remind myself that i am making this really dramatic in my head. it's probably not that deep. i always say time will tell but shouldn't it be my turn? i don't know if i'll ever be ready for that, i reckon i need to push myself one day. one day....

in the mean time, working on myself sounds really good. i need to prioritise that more. more good habits!

[okiria]

psssst okiria and 6, 7 and 15 for the before dating ask meme? (I feel like a girl gossiping at a sleepover cause im so curious omg)

(twirls my hair with my finger and kicks my feet as i lay on the end of the bed) omg so it went like this–

(first i have an obligation to post this clip)

(and NOW under cut bc this will be a lot)

6. How did you react once you realized you had feelings for them? Were you calm, stressed, in denial, etc.? Vice versa?

Ria: Ria is in touch/honest with her emotions, so she realizes it fairly soon and isn't in denial. She speedruns the 5 stages of grief about it because she's convinced that "Sougo needs a friend and I can't risk ruining that" (and ofc she doesn't want to risk losing the friendship either). Cue the typical pain of "I'm in love with my best friend" where every touch that was once casual and friendly is making your heart leap out of your chest.

Sougo: Even though Sougo is someone who wouldn't really deny himself any indulgence, I think he is so out of touch with any emotion that causes vulnerability that he just subconsciously doesn't even allow himself to consider a serious romance. Sure everyone asks him if he and Ria are dating, and maybe he'll joke about it, but he doesn't let himself seriously consider the idea of being in love. So when he DOES realize it (short retelling of this post but:) I think he's blindsided by it. That he thought he was in control this whole time, but day by day this wall he put up where he would never let his guard down again was being chipped away at. And he has very split feelings about this.

7. You’ve just come to realize you have a crush on your f/o. How was it like when you encountered them again after that? Were you able to keep your cool around them, or was it awkward? How about vice versa?

Ria: Bites her tongue a bit more, is LESS casually touchy bc she's overthinking it and now it makes her nervous!! Initially she gets over the change, realizes Sougo doesn't know she has feelings, and just goes back to business as usual (aside from the internal torment).

Sougo: (LMAO okay I need to finish the fic I was writing about this but) I think that, again he would be so overwhelmed and blindsided that he would need her to get away from him to process it. Maybe thinks "okay I need to get over this crush like Right Now Immediately" because his fear of being vulnerable outweighs the selfishness of just wanting Ria. In the end if he can't get rid of the feeling, the only way he can regain control of himself is if he just confesses.

15. Does anyone else know about your feelings for your f/o? Did they find out on their own, or did you go to them? How about vice versa? Does anyone else know about your f/o’s feelings for you?

Ria: To preface I think Ria and Kagura would have an older/younger sister relationship, especially with the shared experience of being an amanto. If Sougo and Kagura are parallels the same way Gin and Hiji are, then Ria is sort of an extension of that. Anyway Kagura knows because she just accuses them of dating, and Ria explains they're not but admits she does love him. Kagura gags and tries to convince her she can do better.

Sougo: Every damn person in Edo knows except him

[ground-riot-jack]

Number 1 | K. Bakugou |

idk what this is man, an origin story maybe?? idk bakugou is an asshole and reader is a badass

The ratings where in, this is it, the big moment. After years of hard work and dedication, you’re finally about to find out if you made it the number Number 1 Hero Spot. You walk out on the stage with the other Top 5 heroes, one being your long term boyfriend, Bakugou. You’d been dating since highschool and worked at the same agency that he created.

“And for our number 2 Hero, we have...Ground Zero! Number 1... Angel! Thank you heroes for protecting and sacrificing your lives for us!” The announcer practically yelled at the large crowd of people.

You couldn’t believe it. You did it. You were the number 1 hero in all of Japan and your boyfriend was right behind you. The lights of the stage felt like power surging through your body. Your large white wings fluttered in excitement. You took your place at the number one podium and felt warm tears of joy stream down your face, you feel pata on your back and can hear congratulations swirling around but you can barely stand up straight.

Soon someone hands you a microphone, the crowd quieting down.

“Thank you all so much, I will work hard every single day until my body gives up to make sure this great nation is protected. I’ve worked very hard to get here so thank you all for recognizing my hard work and determination. I wanna thank Ground Zero, for being the best partner and for helping me get where I am. It won’t be easy but I will take this number 1 spot and wear it with pride. Thank you, i love you all” You spill out happily, you turn and grab onto Katsuki, hugging him and congratulating him on Number 2. You’d both climbed so high and so quickly since you’re UA days, it’s made you happy that you’ve come so far with the person you love most.

Bakugou however, didn’t look happy. It was extremely rare to see a smile on his face, but at the very least you’d expected his bored face. But now, he looked angry. He looked like he was ready to level the city withy he scowl pressed on his face.

“babe, what’s wrong? you good?” You grab his large bicep, getting him to look at you. His bright red eyes snap to yours and you feel locked in with how much animosity they hold.

“I’m ready to go home” He spits out before turning and walking back to the car you’d both arrived in.

You took a few more pictures with fans before following your grumpy boyfriend. As soon as you sat in the car, you could feel the tension thick in the air.

“Ok seriously babe, what the hell is wrong? We got the top spots, that’s amazing!” You turn towards him as the driver head back to your place.

“It’s nothing” He managed to say through his teeth with his are locked together with how tight he’s clenching his jaw.

“It’s something, you’re getting ready to blow this car up”

“I said it’s nothing, Angel” He speaks, the name oozing in malice and anger. Suddenly it clicked.

“You’re jealous that I got the number one spot while you got number two. jesus christ katsuki, could you be any more pessimistic. Why can’t you just be happy for me that i’ve reached a goal i’ve been trying to get my whole life? Number two is in no way shape or form bad.” You huff and fall back against the seat, you watch Bakugou clench and unclench his fists while staring out the window.

“I have to be number one and be better than All Might” He growls quietly, you knew it was a somewhat sensitive subject, but you couldn’t believe your ears.

“All might? Katsuki, you’re 23 years old, you can’t truly expect to be better than All Might right now? All might wasn’t even this good at this age yet, you’re way ahead of schedule. You can’t be happy for me because you wanna be better at 22 years old than All Might was in his prime? You’re delusional katsuki.”

“I HAVE TO BE NUMBER ONE”

“THATS FINE BUT WHY CANT YOU BE HAPPY THAT TOUR GIRLFRIEND IS NUMBER ONE?”

“BECAUSE IT SHOULD BE ME”

“so you think I don’t deserve this katsuki? You think what? I haven’t worked hard enough? I’m nor strong enough? I’m not good enough? WHAT IS IT KATSUKI? Why don’t I deserve to be number one? Why do you think your were unfairly judged?”

You both stared at each other in silence for a while, anger boiling into the atmosphere. You understood the only thing that drove bakugou in highschool was his need to be number one. You were both adults now, and you were in love with each other. You’d hoped that you’d made a big enough impact on bakugou that your life and love together would be enough of a motivator to be great, the way it was with you.

You felt that car pull into your large home, and immediately jumped out, racing up to your shared bedroom. You got out of your hero costume and into leggings and a tank top. You took off all your makeup and picked the confetti out of your wings. You looked up as Bakugou walked in the room.

“Im not sorry that I’m not settling for number two, I never will and you know it, but i am sorry for yelling at you and the way I acted.” Katsuki grumbled while looking at the floor. Usually, his awkward and hesitant apologies warmed your heart and made you gush at how cute your angry boyfriend was, but now you find yourself staying angry.

“That’s not an apology katsuki. You refuse to be happy for me, even though you promised you would be. You refuse to even acknowledge how much work I put into this to be number one. I am THE youngest Hero to hit number one and you can’t even say good job babe. Instead you get angry and jealous and mean because it wasn’t you. Never mind the fact that you jumped from 10 to 2 which is THE biggest jump anyone’s seen in years bakugou. You won’t even let yourself be happy at what you’ve done, because you’re too busy being jealous” You poke his chest, finally standing in front of him.

“It’s not a bad thing to want to be the best” He crosses his arms, getting defensive.

“Of course not babe, I want you to be the best too. So why don’t you want me to be the best?”

“It’s not that, it’s-“

“It’s what Katsuki?”

“I made a promise to myself-”

“YOU MADE A PROMISE TO ME KATSUKI. You gave me this fucking promise ring and told me that you you’re gonna support me no matter what. That we were gonna work hard to get to where we need to go and we were gonna do it together. You promised me you’d be by my side. That’s the difference between us babe. You need to be number one for yourself, I need to be number one for us. You’ve forgotten that” You wipe your tears and move around the tall man in your way. It hurt that Katsuki couldn’t see this was bigger than his highschool days. This was your life together. You hadn’t spoken to All Might or even Midoriya in years, so why was it so hard for him to accept you as a permanent part of his life.

“Baby, i’m sorry I just. I get one track minded and I was so hopeful that this was finally the day. I needed so bad to be number one-“

“THIS IS NO LONGER ABOUT BEING NUMBER ONE KATSUKI, THIS IS ABOUT HOW YOU CANT SEE THAT YOURE TREATING ME LIKE A SIDE CHARACTER. I AM YOUR GIRLFRIEND!! For fucks sake katsuki, we live, work, sleep, eat do and do everything together, so the fact that I’m not even one of the reasons you go out and do what you do hurts because this” You pause and gestured to everything around you. “This is the reason I wake up every morning, you are the reason I fight crime and your reason is, a childhood rivalry. You’re am adult now, you’re supposed to be friends with midoriya and all might and you’re supposed to be over this whole thing. This isn’t supposed to be the thing that drives you. I’m not saying I have to be too of the list but it would be nice to be on the list” You sigh and look at your boyfriend. You knew this wasn’t healthy to yell at each other like this, but you needed him to understand where you’re coming from.

“Baby, Of course you’re my reason for waking up and being a hero, I would do anything to protect you, it’s just I always pictured me at Number 1 with my agency and you and a family. I have a need, a primal urge to be number one and that’s never going to change. Doesn’t mean i don’t love your dumbass”

“Well I’m number one Katsuki, and I earned the hell out of it. I worked my ass off day and night for weeks and months and years so that I could have this. And to see you pout and complain and look me in my face and tell me you don’t think I deserve this spot hurts more than some cute little apology where you call me dumbass lovingly. So i’ll ask you again, why don’t you think I deserve this spot? What makes you better?” You squinted your eyes at the tall man and clench your jaw.

“Im physically stronger-“ You interrupt your boyfriend by grabbing his arm and kicking his legs out from under him, using your wings to flip him over in his back, pinning him down.

“You’re so close minded katsuki, that you don’t even know what i’ve. been doing for the past 8 months. I an the number one hero you think i didn’t train to be stronger than everyone around me?” You ask, hurt laced in your voice.

“Fine, you deserve this spot. You’re the best.”

“You dont meant that, I’m gonna make you fucking mean it Katsuki. One day you’re gonna see me and i’m gonna be the best and you’re gonna be in awe of my power and then you’ll finally see that i deserve this.” You push off of him and stand up your wings tucking close to your body.

“Just-give me a week babe. I promise I’ll make it up to you and I’ll show you I am happy for you, it’s just difficult being let down like this. I’m a sore loser and you know it.” Bakugou grabs your shoulder and pulls you close to his chest.

“You haven’t even said you’re proud of me yet. or that you love me. or even good job katsuki. You don’t believe i’m your heart that i deserve this do you?” You look at him, heart in your throat.

“I believe I should be number one. Every time.” Katsuki mutters in your hair like it was a compliment. You push him back, rage filling your body.

“You’re fucked up katsuki. I’m fucking leaving” You spit, throwing on a jacket and shoes, heading towards your front door.

“Where the hell are you going?!” Bakugou snarls as you move past him.

“Katsuki, I love you with every fiber of my soul, but right now looking at your face makes me wanna throw you across town and beat the shit out of you. I’ll be back tomorrow maybe” You mumble the last part, not really sure how long you wanna be away from your hot headed boyfriend.

“you can’t just fucking leave y/n, how do you expect to be number one of you can’t even stay and win a fight against your boyfriend.” Katsuki let’s out a dry laugh, causing you to turn away from your front door.

You lunge at Katsuki, ready to punch him until he understands you’re the number one hero. You two roll around fighting and spewing things typically reserved for villains. Bakugou pins you down on the floor, his knee on your chest and his hands holding both your wrists beside your head. You close your eyes and focus all your energy into your chest, a faint ball of white light glows from your heart. Ktsuki looks at it with realization before the energy is expelled from you and your boyfriend is sent flying across the living room.

“You did not just use Power Surge on me.” He growls. wiping the sweat from his brow.

“I did, and i’m fucking leaving and your not gonna say shit or so help me god katsuki, i will shoot a beam of light so bright and hot that you wake up blind, burnt and fucking single.” You use your wings to send you flying straight to your front door, you look back at your confused boyfriend once more before taking to the sky.

Bakugou began the cleaning process, shocked and confused. Why didn’t you understand he wants to be happy for you, he truly does, but his pride won’t let him get away with not winning. He decided to let you fly off to calm down for the night, opting to call and talk to Kirishima. The two friends ended up talking for a bit longer than expected, bakugou trying to get kiri on his side, not his girlfriends. It didn’t work however, Kirishima understood that bakugou would let his emotions cloud his mind, even when it came to you. By the end of the conversation, bakugou was almost has heated as he was while fighting you. He concluded the best option was to head to his agency and train for the night.

He arrived and decided to do some things around the office before heading to the training and workout wing of his large building. While going thru last minute files, there’s a knock on his door.

“Ground Zero, i wasn’t expecting you to be here so late.” A stranger smiles in Bakugou face as he opens his office door, his secretary smiling sheepishly.

“Who the hell are you?” He cocks his head and tries to figure it out before he’s told, one of those weird habits he’s picked up being a hero.

“My apologies. I’m Niko Takeyama, I work for the Hero Commission. How would you like to be the number one hero by this time next month.”

[17tetsuro]

could u do fake dating headcanons where they slowly fall for u w atsumu, kenma & oikawa,, gn pronounces are fine :)

haikyuu boys slowly falling for you (fake dating edition) (gn!reader)

feat: atsumu, kenma, oikawa

warnings: fake dating, abuse of cliche tropes and commas and question marks, timeskip setting because im anything but creative, swearing

requests are open!

a/n: thank you for requesting this!! i hope you like it :D

atsumu

* you’ve been friends with him ever since high school and you watched his career grow

* youre both equally proud of each other n your friendship is built on mutual respect, trust and love

* you basically live in his apartment, with how much time you spend over there

* he would complain 24/7 about not having anyone to go to events with

* at one point you wanted to strangle him for never shutting up about it so you propose you go with him from time to time

* atsumu: “yeah, that was a setup”

* he KNOWS you’re drop dead gorgeous and everyone will be jealous of him that you’re with him (and you also look very good in formalwear, which he very much enjoys)

* and you get to have free food and drinks and also wear immaculate expensive clothes

* so,, you became his regular date for sponsorship events and stuff

* and you never really outright said you were just friends?? so you’re used to the media portraying you two as lovers but your close circle is aware that your relationship is platonic

* everything was going great until one of his sponsor company’s heir started hitting on you

* atsumu saw you flirting with the person and his mind went blank

* he,, he didn’t understand why he wanted to commit multiple crimes on the spot

* bokuto conveniently showed up next to atsumu at that moment

“hey, atsumu? why is your date flirting with them?” bokuto asked, suddenly appearing next to atsumu, which startled the latter out of his thoughts.

a better question would be why atsumu saw red at the thought of you getting friendly with anyone but him that night. he tried his best to keep his composure, but it was hard when you rested a hand on the heir’s shoulder, leaning your head back while laughing.

“atsumu, are you not going to answer me? your lover is-“

“my what?” atsumu asked, attention now completely off you.

“your lover? is that a term you don’t like? i could say partner... significant other... or anything you want, really,” bokuto answered, apologizing.

“you- you think me and (y/n) are together?”

“aren’t you? what, with the way you look at each other i was convinced you two were like... high school sweethearts or something, who hate pda,” bokuto explained, while atsumu’s eyes trailed back to you.

“you think... you think they’d wan’ me?”

“are you blind, buddy?”

you must have sensed their gazes, because as soon as those words left bokuto’s mouth, your eyes snapped towards atsumu and bokuto. the latter started waving with a cheerful smile while the former just stood, entranced by you and your presence. atsumu noticed traces of confusion appearing on your face, and watched as you excused yourself from the conversation you were previously interested in.

“‘tsumu, are you alright?” you questioned, approaching the pair. bokuto grinned and left, which made you even more confused.

“yeah, i’m fi- fine. hey, uh, (y/n), say... do you- why did you offer to come to these events as my date?” atsumu asked, eyes dead set on yours. you cracked a confused smile. you seemed to be capable of nothing but confusion at the moment.

“because you’re my best friend and i hated to see you so down because of your loneliness at these gatherings,” you replied, holding his gaze. “why didn’t you oppose it?”

his eyes studied you and when he saw nothing but sincerity, he let out a loud sigh. this was all very new and confusing to him. it’s like bokuto calling you atsumu’s lover set off a bomb inside his head that instead of causing a mess, made everything fall into place; why his gaze seemed to linger on you more often than before, why he was so eager to choose your outfits for these events, why he went to parties he didn’t even have to attend, why he got so jealous and angry when he saw you with the cute heir.

“holy shit,” he breathed and ran his hands through his hair, letting out a nervous chuckle and lowering his gaze to the ground. “holy shit.”

“you look like you’ve been enlightened, and i love that for you, but ‘tsumu, i’m still very confused.”

“i’m in love with you,” he said in disbelief, and quickly snapped his eyes back to your face when he realized he said it out loud. “i- i mean- i’m not in love with you, no way in hell, you’re- you’re my best friend, you- you smack my head whenever i say somethin’ inappropriate, you keep me from underminin’ myself, you always lift my spirits and for fuck’s sake, please, stop lookin’ at me like that because i will be getting hopeful and if you’re just joking, i will never hear the end of it and-“

you finally hd enough of his rambling and cut him off with a kiss. at first he froze, but seconds later he melted into your embrace, hands sneaking around your waist, pulling you closer.

when your lips separated, atsumu gasping for air after his word vomit and the long kiss you shared, you spoke up. “miya atsumu, you’re a real dumbass, you know that?”

his breath hitched and you kept quiet for a second to let him suffer a bit.

“but you’re my dumbass. i love you, you absolute piece of work.”

atsumu honest to god giggled and leaned in for another kiss, which you gave him without hesitation.

somewhere in the room, bokuto was collecting the money sakusa promised to give him if he got you two to kiss.

kenma

* kenma and you are both twitch streamers with similar content so you knew of each other but weren’t properly introduced

* until one of your mutual friends invited you both to stream among us with them

* you obv accepted

* so during the 3 hr stream, you and kenma were imposters together a lot and had the biggest, most twisted imp plays

* a friendly competition broke out at one point, too, trying to see who exposed the most impostors between the two of you

* your fans ate your dynamic up

* from then on, you two interacted more and started to appear in each others’ streams

* kenma even invited you to his minecraft smp

* you became besties basically

* SO

* all fun and games

* and then a huge sponsorship opportunity rolled in

* and the people at the company assumed you were dating

* uh oh

* you couldnt just tell them they have it wrong bc the whole thing depended on your relationship

* so

* big brain kenma suggest you two start to “date”

* you were against deceiving your followers but kenma assured you you could have a public breakup and tell everyone you were better off as friends

* so you reluctantly agreed

* it was only for two months anyways, what could go wrong?

* both of you, on week 3, in separate discord calls: uh oh, im in l*ve

* you both tried to cope (read: repress everything) but the realization on both of your parts threw your dynamic off a bit and fans have noticed

* so you had to do something abt it

* so kenma suggested you try your hand at a minecraft challenge together

* it was all fun and games until it wasnt

* you somehow ended up flirting back and forth ????

* chat was goin crazy, even in sub only mode

* both of you: ha ha im in danger

* when the stream ended, you stayed on call, because that was a routine you stuck to no matter what

“so... how are you doing?” you asked kenma, trying to clear the awkwardness from the air.

“good.”

maybe you should have taken kenma’s refusal to talk about anything into account when initiating conversation.

kenma, on the other end of the call was anxiously playing with his fingers, trying to figure out if his chat was right, and you were indeed flirting with him. and him with you. god.

“hey, y/n,” kenma said after a while, “were you flirting with me?”

his bluntness startled you and you had to mute yourself for a few seconds while you collected yourself.

“is there a correct answer?” you asked hesitantly.

“yes.”

“oh... uhm, maybe? it wasn’t intentional. or maybe it was, subconsciously, i don’t know,” you admitted quietly.

“good. it was intentional on my part, i think,” and okay, that was not the reply you expected to hear.

“really?”

“yeah, i- i like you i guess,” he said, sounding more confident by the minute. “do you like me too?”

“i- yeah. i do. i like you, kenma,” you replied, sighing a breath of relief. it felt good to admit it aloud to him.

“do you- would you maybe want to come over?” he asked sheepishly, which made absolutely no sense because he sounded so confident a second ago. “we could play mario kart?”

you let the beaming smile you were holding back take over your face. “i’ll be there in 10, kenma.”

“i’ll be waiting for you.”

oikawa

* on god mans hated your guts

* like,, okay, you were iwa’s close friend but you were so annoyingly honest all the time

* it drove him mad

* what also drove him mad is the fact that you loved to tease him

* no matter what the circumstance, whether he was in japan or in argentina, you always found a way to make him blush

* okay so maybe hate is a strong word, because he kind of thought you were pretty, but in a platonic way

* dumbass

* iwa always give both of you shit for not liking each other

* so you came up with a big brain idea

* you: ”oikawa! we should date!”

* oikawa: “what”

* after you explained the concept of fake dating to him and its benefits (which included a staged dramatic breakup, giving you both a reason to hate each other without iwa complaining)

* he was totally down

* iwa, when he first saw you holding hands: “i knew it”

* SO!! thus began weeks of pretending to be in love with each other for the sake of iwa

* which turned from pretending to not pretending real quick for your liking

* falling in love with oikawa was not a plan of yours

* (falling in love with you wasn’t his, either)

* with iwa’s constant nagging of “i knew it, you both were head over heels for each other from the moment you met”, the time for the breakup came quicker than expected (maybe you both had enough. so what.)

* you agreed to do it in front of iwa so he could see it happen

* you chose a mcdonalds parking lot, because then you could storm off and iwa would follow you to make sure you were ok and oikawa could go home and sleep

* maybe winging it was not the best idea

“babe,” you said with venom, “haven’t i told you a thousand times that i do not want to hear about your exes? seriously, it’s like the only thing you talk about,” you complained, as your fake-boyfriend took a sip from his drink.

“well, babe,” his tone matching yours, “i would shut up about them if took the hint sometimes. maybe i don’t like going to the movies as much as you seem to, it’s boring,” he rolled his eyes, subtly glancing at iwa, who looked very uncomfortable third wheeling your argument. good

“jerk. i don’t even want to go to the movies that much, asshole,” you spat, crushing your empty cup in your hand.

“oh, you want to go to the movies plenty. face it, (y/n), you’re boring. no wonder you didn’t have a boyfriend before me,” he replied and his words, even though you knew were fake, still hit hard and you couldn’t help the tears gathering in your eyes.

“okay, then, thanks for these wonderful past few weeks, so glad you decided to take pity on me.” you tried to keep acting, encouraging yourself with the fact that if oikwa meant what he said, you wouldn’t have to talk to him if iwaizumi finally saw you two break up.

you expected a lot of things, but genuineness in oikawa’s eyes was not one of them.

“(y/n), i’m sorry, i didn’t mean it like that,” oikawa pleaded, clearly forgetting about your mutual goal.

with a mumbled whatever, you started walking home, letting the sunset wash over your face. when you knew you were out of sight, you sat down on a bench and just started crying.

you don’t know how much time passed, but you heard a voice behind you speak up.

“hey (y/n).”

“what the fuck do you want, oikawa? to rub in the fact that my first boyfriend was just faking it so his best friend would get off his back? leave me alone, jerk,” you said, trying to wipe your tears away.

“i- i didn’t mean it like that, please, believe me,” he replied, taking a seat next to you. you scooted away from him. he sighed.

“why would i believe you? why do you want to make up, anyways? this fight was pretty real, no way iwaizumi didn’t believe it,” you sniffed.

“because maybe... maybe i was very happy about the fact that i could be your boyfriend, even if it was fake. maybe i’m in love with you,” he said softly, leaning towards you.

“please, stop playing games. it’s over,” you replied, trying very hard to ignore the raw emotion in his voice as he spoke.

“i really am, (y/n). i wasn’t at first, i admit it, but now i am. i love you, please, believe me,” he begged and you finally made eye contact with him. eyes were mirrors of the soul, after all.

you studied his face for a few minutes, looking for anything that could indicate he was trying to pull a shit prank on you, but you found nothing.

“asshole. maybe i’m in love with you too, what would you do if i said that?” you asked, wiping your nose with your sleeves.

“kiss you.”

“do it, then, i guess. but you’re still not completely forgiven.”

“what do i have to do to earn your forgiveness, (y/n)?” he asked and you sent him a mischievous smile.

“take the blame for this whole fiasco with iwaizumi.” he froze at your words and visibly gulped, but nodded nonetheless.

“okay, i will. can i kiss you now?”

you rolled your eyes. “yeah.”

and he did.

[wish-that-i-was-buckys-girl]

For dayton can you write being childhood best friends with him and you've always been there at his races and one day your running late so you don't get to see him before for his pep talk. And his race goes horribly and eventually when he sees you he gets angry and you get in to a argument. But eventually he makes it up to you.

A/N: Alright, here’s my first go at writing for Dayton White! I watched Logan Lucky and absolutely adored it. Dayton does not get the love he deserves! I decided Im going to make this at least a two parter, potentially spanning into one or two more. I really want to dive into the past with these two! This will focus more on their relationship growing up, while the second (and potentially third) part will contain more of the angst. Once again if I don’t write for a Seb character you like, just ask and I’ll try and gain access to it! I hope you guys enjoy. I also really hate to do this, but I recently quit my job due to a toxic work environment. Here is my ko-fi, if you can donate that would be cool, but if you can’t no pressure!!! Love you all ❤️

https://ko-fi.com/kyleey01

Pairings: Dayton White x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Fluff, no proofreading (I’ll get to it)

Word Count: 2.5k

You’re Always There Part 1

Your earliest memory of Dayton was meeting him at Memorial Park in your hometown. You were both 5 years old, new to the world outside of your home. It was the day before Kindergarten, and both of your parents wanted you to make new friends before the first day of school. Hopefully meeting someone in your class, they felt you wouldn’t be as scared being truly away from them for the first time. You only had a single mom, and she did everything for you that she could, even taking you to the park after her long day at work. Dayton had both parents, making it easier for him to let go and meet new people. His home was “complete” by societal standards.

“Mommy I don’t wanna go play on the slide. I wanna go home and play dinosaurs with you” you said looking up at your mother.

She kneeled down to look you in the eye, holding her shining gaze with yours looking both serious and concerned, “Honey, you know you go to school tomorrow. This is your chance to go meet someone new, maybe even have a friend when you go into school tomorrow.”

You were extremely hesitant. You loved your momma, and she loved you more than anything. You had friends on your street that you liked to play with, but your mom was never far away, only a quick yell and she would be there. This was different. She had told you she wasn’t going to be there if you needed her, and that you would have to wait until school was over to see her again. You cried for two days straight after you had the “school” talk. What were you going to do without your mom? She was your superhero, your friend, and the best mother in the whole wide world. You didn’t need anyone else. That’s what you thought, at least. Until you met Dayton.

“Go on chickadee, go make some friends. You’re a big girl now who can build pyramids with blocks and cut out dinosaurs with scissors, you can do anything” your mother said with a smile.

This was all you needed to muster up the courage to conquer the slide. You nodded at your mom and ran off towards the wooden playground. They really should’ve made these things plastic, with splinters and bee stings being common afflictions of being on the playground, but it didn’t matter to you. It was fun all the same.

You began to climb the steps of the huge castle, making your way through drawbridges and holes through the wood to get to the slide. There were two other little girls there, a little older than you, maybe seven. You mustered up a quiet “hi” but they didn’t hear you, already screaming and running off in a different direction. Just when your hopes of making a friend had been dashed, you heard another voice from behind you.

“Hi. What’s your name?”

A boy of brunette hair and ocean blue eyes was staring at you expectantly. You weren’t expecting anyone to respond except those girls, so you were timid at first. You opened your mouth to speak several times but nothing came out. You started to become overwhelmed, tears welling up in your eyes.

The boy noticed, looking at you confused. He had only asked you your name. However, his momma always said if someone was crying, you fix it.

“It’s okay, you don’t have to tell me your name. Do you need a hug?”

All you could do was nod, strangely opening up to this welcoming boy. He smiled and brought you in for a tiny hug. He wants gentle, kind of rough actually as he swayed you back and forth with energy. He pulled away, hoping you had felt better. You did.

“I’m Dayton” he said, smiling at you.

You smiled back, with tear stains still on your cheek.

“I’m Y/N”

“Y/N, it looks like you need another hug” Dayton gave you another hug, holding you until he stopped hearing the faint sniffle that escaped your body every so often.

You pulled away, nodding to indicate you were alright now.

“You wanna go down the slide? My mommy is probably wondering where I am” Dayton asked innocently.

You nodded, relief washing over you that someone wanted to be your friend

“That sounds awesome.”

_______________________________________________

From that day forward, you and Dayton were attached at the hip. Elementary school had been a breeze. Thankfully, Dayton was in your class your first year. Although it didn’t stay that way, you would always find time to meet and play during recess. Recess time turned into meeting after school, and meeting after school extended into high school.

Dayton began racing during freshman year. Your school offered a racing club which allowed students to meet after school and go to various tracks in the state to see what it was like to race. You and Dayton had always gone Go-Kart driving on the weekends, but you never thought it would turn into anything serious. Dayton, however, has found his passion. He started building his own race car after school sophomore year, and even asked if you would come over to help. You knew absolutely nothing about building a race car, but Dayton wanted you to be there and that’s all that mattered.

“Y’know I know nothing about building a damn car right? Do YOU even know anything about building a car?” you posed to Dayton in an almost accusatory tone.

“As a matter of fact, Y/N, I have been studying how to build this ‘damn car’ for over a year now, so why don’t you put a little respect on Francine’s name?”

“Well, Dayton, I suggest you begin studying geometry before you fail the quarter. And you named the thing already? Is it your lover or you car?”

“It’s both” he gave you a weird wink, one on the left, and then another on the right in secession.

“You are absolutely gross, White. I can’t believe I ever agreed to go down that slide with you when we were five. It was probably all apart of your evil plan to keep me from being someone else’s best friend just so I could build this car with you” you rolled your eyes as you sat on the hood of his family car.

“God you’re so right. You caught me. Our entire friendship has been a sham, and it all led up to this moment. And now that I finally have you where I want you...” he said with a low growl, planting both of his hands on either side of you as you sat on the hood of his car.

“I’m gonna get ya!” He said tickling your sides

You shrieked, absolutely taken aback that his hands were all over you.

God, his hands were all over you.

Alright, maybe he is cute, but there was no way you two would ever date. You came to that conclusion a long time ago. Your crush developed in the 6th grade, which is absolutely astounding considering middle schoolers are anything but normal. Even in the most awkward stage of life Dayton still managed to be charming and cute as ever. You were determined to tell him, but he would never shut up about Stacey Waterson. You hated her with every fiber of your being. What was wrong with you after all? You had it all, at least that’s what your mom said. You were decently pretty, immensely funny, and his best friend. You shared everything together. What more could he want? Well, the answer to that question would be Stacey Waterson. He wanted her, and not you.

You came back to from the tickling after laughing for what seemed like minutes. Your sides were hurting from contracting your ab muscles for too long. You pushed Dayton off of you playfully, but he pounced back on you, pinning your arms above your head.

“Say the password and I’ll let you go” he stared you down, being absolutely serious.

However, you wanted to double check.

“You can’t be serious” you retorted back, completely flustered due to the situation you were currently in on top of the incessant tickling that occurred just moments before.

“Oh, I’m serious. Say the password and I’ll let you go!” He said with a huge smile on his face.

“Jesus Christ, let me go you dick” you said while struggling to get up.

Dayton made a loud buzzing sound in your face.

“Try again!”

“Dayton come on let me up!”

Dayton made another loud buzzing sound in your face.

“Come on Y/N, just one little word and this can all go away. All you gotta do is say..”

“Goddamnit Dayton, chicken! Chicken for fuck’s sake” you said waiting for his response.

Dayton made another loud buzzing sound in your face.

“I’m sorry, that’s the old password. There’s a new password” he smiled at you, knowing this was ridiculous.

You finally mustered up the strength to push him off of you.

“What do you mean the password has changed!”

The password “chicken” has been used in every single scenario since you first let. For whatever reason, You and Dayton found that word hilarious when you were at a birthday party in the third grade. It was Danny Henry’s 8th birthday, and of course it was chicken themed. Every child gets infatuated with a new thing every year. Danny happened to live on a farm, and all year he wouldn’t stop talking about getting a pet chicken. You all wore chicken hats, there were chicken plates, a chicken cake. There was even a “Pin the Beak on the Chicken” game which, if you do say so yourself, was way more entertaining than “Pin the Tail on the Donkey.” You and Dayton lost it by the time your mom picked you up from the party, absolutely hysterical in the backseat. Ever since then, it was your secret password for everything.

“I was thinking we should change stuff up. Make up a new password, it has been seven years since we thought of one.”

“Oh yeah? And what is this new life changing password that is soooo good that our childhood memory is being brushed under the rug?” you question.

Dayton had an almost hurt look on his face, but he proposed the new password to you anyways. 

“I thought the new password could be Francine. Y’know, I just think this is another great milestone in our friendship, working on this car and all. This day is really important to me and I’m glad you’re here” he said with sincerity.

You didn’t know what to say. This day did mean a lot to him, and your friendship overall. 

You nodded in agreement. 

“Alright, the new password is Francine. However, I will still be accepting chicken as a password in the future.”

Dayton smiled one of the biggest smiles you had ever seen.

“Deal. Now, let’s get this car on the road. We have a lot of work to do if I’m gonna be ready for my first ever official race next Saturday.”

______________________________________________

Race day was here. You woke up early next Saturday morning and drove over to Dayton’s house to pick him up to go to the race track. Dayton’s dad was taking his race car down in their trailer, but you and Dayton wanted to head to your special place before the race. It was eight o’clock in the morning and Dayton had until noon to get to the race track. 

Ever since the 6th grade, you and Dayton would walk to this rock in the woods after school to talk about your day. Your mom got home at seven every night, so you only had four hours to do something before she got home and realized you were “missing.” You talked about everything on that rock, and that rock was also where you realized you had the biggest crush on someone since your infatuation with Paul Rudd in “Clueless.”

You pulled up in your beat up Dodge Intrepid, newly sporting your license. You grabbed some granola bars and bottles of orange juice to enjoy while sitting on the rock.

You both sat down on ground, leaning up against the thing. You both sighed and enjoyed the crisp cool morning air. Finally, you broke the silence.

“You nervous for today?”

Dayton looked down between his legs while chewing on his granola bar.

“I am absolutely terrified. I mean, what if I mess up?”

You laughed a little.

He looked at you with confusion.

“What’s so funny?” 

You shook your head.

“it’s your first are Dayton. It’s okay to be nervous and even mess up. At the end of the day, everyone is going to be proud of you. We’ll all tell you how great you did because we know how much you care about this. You’ll do amazing.”

He smiled, almost not expecting such kind words to come from your mouth.

“You’re something else Y/N, ya know that?”

“Oh yeah? Stacey Waterson is something else too I bet” you said half jokingly, half serious.

He rolled his eyes. 

“Who gives a fuck about Stacey Waterson when I have a girl like you to cheer me on and surprisingly gives the best pep talks.”

“Well the way I see it she was the one who got the invitation to prom, not little old me who will be spending that Saturday night in my basement playing my PlayStation.” 

He shook his head again.

“I never asked Stacey to prom.”

You suddenly shifted to look at him square in the face.

“What?”

“I said, I didn't ask Stacey to prom.”

You were dumbfounded. He told you he was absolutely determined to take her. What had changed?

“W-Why? Why didn’t you ask her?”

He kept smiling and shaking his head.

“God Y/N, for being one of the smartest girls I have ever met you really can be dumb sometimes.”

“Excuse you, Dayton White, I happen to be taking AP U.S History, Honors Biology, and-”

That’s when you thought heaven had fell down from the skies and landed right on that rock.

Dayton had leaned in and kissed you. God, why did he have to be so charming?

He slowly took your lip into his mouth and gently sucked on it. You reciprocated by taking his top lip into your mouth and began moving your mouth with his. Time had stopped. It felt like you had molded into one person, enjoying the sensation of each other’s lips. 

He finally pulled away, looking you dead in the eyes.

“Do you understand now?”

You nodded, still stunned by his actions.

“I think we better go. I wanna see this handsome boy I kissed win his first race.”

[sokkas-honour]

For the Spotify wrapped, could you do 12 and Korra?

ofc i can! hope you like it :)

run the world!! - korra x reader

paring: korra x fem!reader

wc: 3k

summary/notes: i tend to try and my reader inserts as gn as possible but this one is female. it doesn’t fully relate to the song but i tried.

taglist: @biqherosix @draqondance

so pessimistic, so narcissistic, so cynical, welcome to my own little world.

part two

“so y/n, what do you think of us going to seingi’s after the game? you could meet our new teammate!” bolin approached you as soon as you came out of your slot in the gym with your pro bending team, the red sands rabaroos.

“i don’t have a game tonight bo.” you chuckled, wiping the sweat off of your forehead from your intense training session. you loved seeing the excitement on your best friends face whenever he mentionned his mysterious new teammate.

“mako and i do! don’t you want to watch us beat the zebra frogs?” he insisted, flashing his signature green pleading eyes that always made you cave.

“all right big guy, i’m down.” you gave in and patted his shoulder before you made your way down the hallway to lockerooms in order to change. right as you made the right turn you heard him yell out a ‘yes’ and pictured him punching his fist up in the air. you rolled your eyes and smiled at the idea of the other earth bender doing such but he was your best friend after all, what did you expect?

a couple of hours later after you’d gone home, showered and switched into more casual attire, you found yourself back at the probending arena though now a crowd had formed on the steps as everyone waited for the doors to open. you scanned the crowd and spotted a couple of people having fire ferret signs which made you smile.

you made your way through said crowd and up the stairs only to be met with a slightly smaller crowd of people trying to get the guard, rahaar, to let them in early to see their favorite team the game started. you chuckled slightly at their lousy attempts which guard rahaar’s attention.

“y/n!” he smiled as you pushed your way to the front and greeted him. “come on right in, enjoy the game!”

you thanked him and quickly slithered into the building so that he wouldn’t have to knock down anyone who tried to get in, and thankfully for him, no one did. though you were sure a couple of them complained at the fact that you’d just been able to enter like that. what could you say? they were the pros of being a pro bender.

you took your time to make your way to where you friends were, prepping themselves for the game in the gym and you had guess right as you heard the two brothers arguing.

“where is she?” you heard mako’s voice first as you approached the door and knocked.

“see mako, she’s there!” you could hear the smile in bolins voice as someone’s footsteps came to open the door to let who they thought was their new teammate in.

“sorry to disappoint but i’m not your new teammate.” you awkwardly joked as you met eyes with mako who raised his eyebrow at your presence as he stood next to the door.

“y/n! you’re here!” bolin exclaimed excitedly from behind his older brother.

“bo invited me to join you, your new teammate and him for dinner after the game so i figured i’d see the second best pro bending team play.” you explained as a response to seeing makos slightly confused expression which he nodded to and his face went back to his usual stoic and neutral expression.

“second best?” bolin inquired, placing his hands on his hips as he smirked.

“yeah, second best.” you confirmed, crossing your arms and defying him with your gaze.

“well y/n, we’ll see about that when we play each other in two weeks.” mako joined in on the playful rivalry and you nodded, agreeing to see exactly which of your teams was better.

“two weeks, hope you fire ferrets will be ready to pay for dinner at narook’s in order to celebrate my victory.” you proposed a bet which immediately made the innocent rivalry sound a bit more interesting. you extended your hand to bolin who was now in front of you, intending for him to shake on it as soon as he heard the mention of a paid dinner.

“you’re on!” bolin immediately agreed and place his hand on yours and you both shook on it.

“this is great and all but it doesn’t change the fact that we’re still missing a player and doors open in ten.” mako interrupted your intense playful gazes to alert bolin of the awkward situation they were in.

“shit, doors open in ten? i should go now if i want to go to the bathroom and get popcorn without a line.” mako raised an eyebrow once again at your strange way to exit but it sounded about right, it was you of course, you always had weird priorities. he had hoped you’d maybe take the time to help them figure out what to do but he knew it wasn’t your job to help them, hell, if anything you shouldn’t because one, you were on rival teams and two, realistically you couldn’t do anything.

“make sure you get good seats so you can see how just how much we’ll crush you!” bolin called as you left the gym. you give him a thumbs up in the air, not bothering to turn around.

a false commitment, oh, i never listened

you found a nice spot not too far from the platform after you’d gotten your popcorn. you munched on it as you watched the seats slowly fill, face scrunching up whenever you see someone wearing non fire ferret merch.

you knew they were going to win, they always did, at least with their old teammate, hasook. you hadn’t bothered to listen to their matches from home so you were going in blind.

you would never really admit to never listening to your friends matches, you just didn’t see the point in listening in on the competition, it’s useless. you need to see in front of you in order to study their tactics.

bolin didn’t know that when he invited you to come see their match, you had already planned to come in order to see how much of a rookie their new teammate was, it was kind of an opportunity for you to feel a bit better about your team, as awful as that sounds. one of your teammates had told you that they’d heard of a new waterbender on the fire ferrets that practice before seeing your friend.

you shoved popcorn into your mouth as the lights dimmed and the announcer’s voice boomed throughout the entire stadium. you quickly swallowed in order to cheer when they announced the fire ferrets. the people seated around you didn’t seem to enjoy your cheering for the newer team but at the same time, you didn’t enjoy their cheering for the opposite team.

you leaned in as you saw the three benders in red be brought to the stage and your eyes widened when they landed on the one with the blue rope. she wasn’t small by any means, you couldn’t see her face but just by her stance you could tell she was beautiful.

suddenly, you didn’t even look at your friend’s techniques as they played like they always did in order to give them criticism, no, you couldn’t take your eyes off of the water tribe girl.

you were sure it was only her second or third game but the way she moved made it seem like pro bending was something she’d been practicing for ages. god you wished this game would wrap up so you could meet her.

and im just a problem, and no one's ever solved it,

they announced the fire ferrets win and that’s when you snapped out of your trance, your popcorn long forgotten as you watched the waterbender move around confidently and knocking down her opponents.

little by little, people left their seats and exited the arena all while chatting up a storm about how the game went. you found yourself a part of that crowd up until a certain point where you turned in an opposite direction to see your friends.

you waited for them to exit as you leaned on the wall thinking of how to introduce yourself to the girl that had caught your attention.

“well y/n, impressed yet?” mako was the one to take you out of your thoughts as you looked up at him a smirk quickly making it onto your face.

“honestly no, your form was sloppy.”

“uh huh, sure, i’m totally taking firebending advice from an earth bender.” he rolled his eyes sassily, making sure to emphasise his and your bending.

“you’re taking advice from someone who dated a firebender mister.” you retorted, referring to your past lovers.

before he could reply, bolin came out with a girl as they talked about the game. bolin stopped in his tracks when he saw you and smiled.

you turned your head and mentally, your draw dropped. she was even prettier in person. she was a bit taller than you, her biceps accentuated by her water tribe getup, she had her hair in a traditional ponytail and her blue eyes held nothing but excitement that lingered from the game.

“not a bad game for a rookie.” was the first thing you said to her, making you want to slap your forehead at how dumb that sounded.

“not sure if that’s supposed to be a compliment.” she rose an eye brow as she made eye contact with you. you had to control yourself in order not to blush and break your usual cool composure.

“y/n here doesn’t really give compliments, sorry korra.” bolin jokily informed his teammate earning an arm crossing from you as an attempt to not let the girl see how she made you feel by just standing in front of you.

“then thanks i suppose.” was what she settled with and almost instantly, your mind made a connection with her name, korra. as in avatar korra. as in the newcomer to republic city.

“you guys didn’t tell me the avatar was apart of your team.” you ignored korra’s response, the question being aimed at the brothers.

“it was in the papers.” mako stated as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

“as if i read the papers mako my boy.” you replied, taking a step closer to him, making sure to match your tone which earned a small blush on the firebender’s cheeks which was exactly what you wanted to do.

“yeah, i’m the avatar, big deal. let’s go eat.” korra seemed to get annoyed at your interaction with the firebender, making you cock an eyebrow in confusion. don’t tell me she likes mako was the only thing on your mind as you all nodded.

“wait, she’s coming too?” korra asked as she saw you follow them once you all stepped outside. the boys nodded which earned a little huff from the avatar. your happiness dimmed a bit at the thought of her not wanting to spend time with you, oh well, she’d have to deal with it.

oh, i don't think that i could be the one that you want me to be, its hard for me sometimes to see the light inside my love, i, i, i, i, want to run the world, the world, the world, the world

you all sat around a table at seingi’s, the closest firenation restaurant to the arena. it was surprisingly empty for a friday night. you stared at the menu trying to figure out what you wanted.

“i’m going to get the extra spicy fire noodles.” korra was the first one to announce what she was getting. she put the menu back on the table and waited for everyone to announce theirs.

“you sure you’ll be able to handle that?” you questioned, not bothering to look away from the menu. you knew your question infuriated her, god, you really did suck at flirting.

“if you hadn’t notice yet, i’m also a firebender. so yeah, i think i can handle my spice.” she had seemed to take offense to your question which made you laugh a bit.

“whatever you say miss avatar.” you rolled your eyes with a playful grin as you lowered your menu. you wanted to laugh at the offended expression on her face but you held it in this time, you still wanted her to like you.

“okay well i’m taking the same as korra.” mako announced in an attempt to break up whatever was going, afraid that korra’s short temper would act up to your snarky comments.

“i am too. how about you y/n.” all three of them were taking the spicy noodles. you were originally going to take them as well but that changed once everyone did as well.

“i’m taking the roast duck.” you announced, finally putting down the menu. korra rolled her eyes which confused you.

“you’ve got a problem with that avatar?” you questioned, a smirk making its way onto your face. if your presence seemed to annoy her, then by the spirits were you going to have fun with it. mako knew exactly what you were doing, he’d seen you do it before and knew that your flirting always seemed to dig yourself into a hole that was impossible to get out of.

“no, just confused as to why you’re still here. this is a team celebratory dinner.” she explained, her eyes narrowing you.

“i’m the honorary team member sweetheart. i-" before you could finish your explanation, you felt bolin kick in you in the shin from in front of you.

you hadn’t noticed mako that was seated next to you and bolin, who was in front of you, were secretly communicating to try and break up whatever fight that could happen. you were too engrossed in the beautiful avatar to notice.

“y/n’s our friend and we haven’t had dinner together in a while.” bolin explained after laughing nervously. korra nodded before looking over to mako to discuss his winning play.

everyone participated in the conversion but you. sure you listened but you couldn’t tear your eyes off of korra, wether she was speaking or not. the passion, the excitement and the love in her gaze and words as she spoke to the brothers about the game made you jealous, spirits did you wish she would talk that way to you.

you barely knew her and she didn’t seem to particularly love you but you wanted to be her entire world after just one look at her.

i’m never honest, i'm faking all this

dinner had gone on without much noise from you, which definitely raised suspicions for the two brothers. korra didn’t seem to care or notice so when she got up to go to the bathroom, their attention immediately went to you.

“is everything alright y/n?” bolin asked you, concern written all over his face.

“yeah, just a bit tired is all.” you lied, not wanting them to catch on that korra was filling your thoughts.

“you sure?” mako insisted, placing a hand on your shoulder. you nodded and looked away. you spotted korra and her smile dropped when mako placed his hand on your shoulder.

“yeah. can i finish your noodles?” you attempted to switch the subject, batting your eyelashes at mako in an exaggerated manor. he laughed and switched your dishes.

you danced a little bit in your seat and teased the broth before you ate the noodles, still warm.

“really? you’re still hungry? that duck was huge.” korra commented once she came back to her seat.

“i’m just making sure we don’t waste any money.” you started matter of factly which earned what was probably the fifth eye roll of the night from the avatar.

once again, mako and bolin steared the conversation in another direction to avoid any conflict. this time though, you made sure you were heard.

once dinner was over and you had all stepped out, korra approached you and your heartrate picked up.

“see? told you i could handle the spice.” she teased which came as a surprise to you, she hadn’t said anything particularly friendly to you all evening but you hadn’t either.

“master of four elements, master of all foods.” you joked, shoving your hands in your pockets. she chuckled at your words and suddenly, it was your favourite sound in the world.

Just point those fingers, cause i could never be hurt.

bolin accompanied korra to the docks so she could head back to air temple island and mako walked you back to your appartement.

“you suck at flirting y/n.” was the first he said when the others had left.

“and you’re better than me? mister i don’t show emotions?” you replied as you started walking, not wanting him to bring up anything that happened during dinner.

“please, i managed to get you.” he teased, jogging to catch up to you.

“you managed to take me on one date.” you corrected him, not taking your eyes off of the road in front of you.

“same difference.” he rolled his eyes.

“she likes you.” a small silence had settled and you decided to break it.

“who, korra? please, the bickering between the two of you was filled with sexual tension.” he teased, gently bumping his shoulder into yours.

“nah, she looked at you a certain way. besides, i don’t like miss prissy avatar.”

“you know y/n, that dinner was the first time i’ve seen you not try to the center of attention during dinner. and you have no room to call her prissy when you tend to be no better.”

“believe me, i could care less. i was just tired.” you stopped walking as you had arrived in front of your apartment building.

“i know you like her and, a word of advice, don’t be too cynical with her like you’ve been with basically all of your exes. korra isn’t the type of girl to let that slide.” he said before bidding you goodbye and retracting his steps.

you processed his words as you went up the stairs. he was right but you’d never admit it.

you went to your window that faced air temple island and just stared at it, hoping that korra had gotten home safe.

unbeknownst to you, korra was looking out of her window and staring at the apartments, hoping that one of them was yours.

[ohbae-me]

okay so, im about to go ham because i truly stand strong in my shoujo fantasy.

In my opinion, im pretty sure (like 89%) lucifer tells us that whenever mammon breaks off a relationship with someone, they go broke completely after. so hes had previous relationships before, as for the rest of the boys, im pretty sure lucifer has, but nothing serious, he wont let anyone in, MC is literally the only person who has pushed past his walls and seen him for more than pride. satan, 100% he has never had a relationship, levi, has had a couple of fwbs and other relationships but they always fizzle out, never lasting. asmo has never had a serious relationship, always just flings. belphie never had a serious relationship and same with beel. i truly believe MC is their first true loves, i know what youre thinking "theyve been alive for so long, theres no way someone couldnt have been special to them" but the thing is, theyre so different with MC; their entire dynamic and relationships changed with MC, MC saw them for more than their sin and got to know them to their very core, while yes the other relationships never lasted, thats not to say the boys didnt love them; but just not in the way they love MC. i believe MC to be a true love, not just a love, the difference for me is all of the boys would gladly give up chasing MC once she finds herself happy with another brother, instead of forcing them to choose yk? the "as long as youre happy, it kills me everytime i look at you smile at him, but i love you too much to let you be miserable with me" and i dont think any of them have experienced. also, with the whole "new relationship" thing, the honey moon phase, while yes every couple has it, i feel like with MC it would just, last. not to say they wouldnt have fights; ofc they would, but its different with MC, everyday the brothers would wake up and chose the option to love and fall in love all over again, speaking further on that, i dont think any of them would truly get over MC. and i mean that; (i dont think MC is going to die, obey me devs have something planned LOL, plus theyre super powerful, like the other anon said i dont think theyd be able to really function without them, even if they do "get over" mcs death at some point.) after MC dies i feel like the family dynamic wouldnt be the same, the brothers would get quieter and would never truly forget about it? and every relationship would fail because theyre not MC (you dont have to agree but i love reverse harems), like i 100% hc that after MC chooses another brother or after they die, mammon would try and try to find new flings, even after its been decades mammon finds someone whos super similar to MC, their look, personality, etc, but one wrong move and theyre out. (say MC doesnt like pickles, but the replacement for MC does, he would immediately start crying and call mc a stupid human who he shouldnt have fallen for.) anyways in conclusion, i truly dont think MC would ever die canonically in the obey me game, the devs are sneaky (love you devs), but even if they would, i really feel like they would never get truly over it. some part of me truly believes that the brothers would go back to being distant, how they were before. they would sit at the table and eat in silence, asmo would begin partying ten times harder (since we already know he uses his ego to cover up his major insecurity of people not liking him and how he feels about himself) and the brothers would become even more indugled in their sin. also, for every relationship they would have, they would just compare them to MC, and yeah but I cannot see MC dying. the other stuff about what the brothers would be like after MC dies could also be applied to when MC chooses her s/o. i think the brothers would be super fucking hurt, that was their first love, their first understanding who walked out and chose someone who wasnt them. anyways thats all, you dont have to reply i just felt like i needed to get this off of my chest, also im gonna be pretty frequent on your blog ( i love ur writing ) so im gonna call myself cake anon! have a great day! - cake anon

Hello Cake! iluuu! Thanks for this, i really love getting every ones take on these things! And there is defs a lot that i agree with here. 

I agree with the Mammon part. Out of all of the brothers, i feel he is probably the easiest to get emotionally attached in a relationship, so i see him as the one with the most previous relationships. Asmo coming in second, but his being mostly flings or poly/open relationships. I’m sure Mammon has had some serious ones as well as many flings, where Asmo’s have never been overly serious and certainly never long lasting. I’m also sure Luci has had a few, some more serious than others, but he wouldn’t get overly attached emotionally. I’m sure he’d be too busy with Diavolo since arriving, being the workaholic he is. I’m sure not many partners would be willing to deal with that level of non-commitment and emotional unavailability from him.Levi I feel like all his relationships never left that awkward early stage, and his only ‘serious’ relationships would have been strictly online, maybe a couple meetups that made him nope right out of it. Satan, again, has probably just gone on some casual dates but didn’t have much interest in actually dating rather than gaining connections. i feel like Beel is the most likely candidate to have had healthy previous relationships. He is pretty well balanced emotionally and has a good outlook on love and family values. I’m sure he’s had a few serious relationships and has dated his share of people. Belphie gives me vibes of had one or two previous serious relationships that did not end well at all and now he’s a salty sob over it lmao. 

I still don’t feel like MC is necessarily their first true love, but maybe the first different kind of love for them. MC has reached them in ways no one else has, they don’t try to change anything, they fit in well with the whole family, they understand their sins etc. I have loved a few different people in my life, and each one was such a different experience for me. The first guy i loved, i consider to be my first true love. However, it didn’t work. And then i met the man I eventually married, he wasn’t my first true love, but it was a better kind of love, yk? 

And uugghh you ripped my heart out with how the brothers would feel if MC chose a different brother!!!! Because they all would be so heartbroken it’s not them, but they really truly just want mc to be happy and cared for, and they know their brother would keep them safe and provide well. 

A few asks ago, i mentioned that the brothers would move on eventually. I think there is a big difference in moving on and getting over that I maybe didn’t articulate very well. If MC were to die or choose someone else, they would move on eventually, but they might not ever really get over it. My heart hurts just thinking about how they would feel trying to move on. Like you mentioned, the empty, quiet dinner tables, lackluster parties and festivals, it would be like they lost their best friend. (i giggled picturing your mammon scenario with the pickle because that’s exactly how he’d react to something so small lmaooo)

I also agree that i don’t think the devs will kill mc off (again), that just seems like a really crappy way to end the game!! I’m curious to see how they would make different routes go if you can only romance one of them end game, vs you being able to have them all? I wonder if we’d get a choice in the whole becoming immortal thing or not? 

Sorry if this reply was too long and rambly, i absolutely love discussing these kinds of things!! I always welcome these asks!!! 

[heyitsyn]

Complicated

Shirabu x Reader

a/n: im not very familiar with shirabu on a spiritual level like i am w the other characters but ill try my best!! 

request:  okok haikyuu hcs: shirabu is reader’s childhood best friend and messed up their last game in middle school because he changed his setting style to accommodate ushijima,,, and reader, as the manager is very very pissed and they get into a huge fight,,, so once they get to stz they’re academic rivals, reader became the vbc manager just to spite him (oh yea they definitely still have crushes on each other but it’s hard with the current situation) only if it’s ok!! not a lot of ppl write for him :

this is kinda the best friends-to-rivals-to-friends again-to-lovers

requests open!!

lets get our inhalers bc this finna be a wild one luvs

so, basically,

you and him were actually childhood friends since he lived next door to you

lets say you met when you were 5 and you just stuck on to this slightly cold and dismissive boy who was the shy type

idk bout you but i actually like that type

ppl dont really understand how yall got along bc you were the extrovert and the laughing type of girl

he only stuck around bc you were actually a smart person who helped him occassionally w your organized notes

but he still appreciates your time and efforts to be his friend despite his personality

plus, you also liked volleyball and together you both would watch volleyball matches in his house where you would see him with a smile that he unconsciously wears

like when yall were 8, you gave him a volleyball for his birthday since he lost his old one when he was playing by the river

at first, he was like, ‘oh, thanks, i needed this’

but then as he started tossing it up and down, you could see that bashful smile starting to surface

you shrieked, 

bc you rarely see it and you think its super cute,

and just wrap him up in a hug and he turns all shy again but with a soft smile and a soft blush

‘thanks, n/n-chan’

uh oh, feelings

stinky

since he mainly focused on doing homework or studying, not a whole lot of kids really approached him to hang out since they thought he only lived to study and play volleyball

but you didnt care bc youve been friends w this bun for a long time and you know hes not really like that

he has fun moments too

since you were the manager of the volleyball team, you always try to showcase how fun he was by trying to take the team to bonding places 

the team does think that shirabu has fun but only if its w you

anyways

one afternoon, you naturally just go to his house w him since your mothers know youre practically best friends and so you basically live in each others houses

yall were about halfway through middle school so shirabu has been studying more to get scholarships for schools

he was studying on the little table while leaning against his bed while you were just lounging on his bed after studying

‘ken-channnnn’

oikawa 2.0

‘hm’

you pouted at the distracted reply before sitting up and wrapping your arms around his shoulder from behind him and placing your chin on his shoulder

‘lets do something fun!!!! im boredddd’

he wasnt really fazed by the skinship bc youve been like that to him since day 1

but thats going to change soon

‘i have a new sudoku book over there that you could do’

omg what

‘ken-chan!’

you shrieked in betrayal before leaping off the bed and grabbing his arm to stand him up

shirabu was actually annoyed that you were distracting his studying but seeing a wide grin on your face made him double stop

am i,,,, catching feelings?

nah, he just going through puberty

‘lets go to the fall market! yuki-chan told me theres a new food place that opened and theyre handing out free samples!’

you excitedly told him and continued shaking his arm to persuade him in going

‘n/n-chan, this is my only free day from volleyball to study. i need to pass the test on friday’

you rolled your eyes at that lame excuse

‘i know. i set up the schedule differently bc you have a big test on friday! but you would still have time to study!’

‘but im still unfamilair with the topic-’

‘cmon, ken-chan! youre so smart you could rival buddha!’

‘i dont think,,,,, thats a right comparison’

‘either way, we’re going to hang out and have fun!’

he honestly didnt know why he was at this crowded market w you

shirabu is a whole simp

‘omg ken-chan! look! takoyaki!’

you dragged him to the stall and the nice old lady smiled before taking your order

‘1 box please. ken-chan, you want?’

he shook his head no and started taking out his wallet to pay

but you stopped him

‘no, you dont have to pay since youre not eating’

‘but i want to’

‘ken-chan! you need to save up for college!’

‘no its fine im pay-’

‘here ya go, dear. free of charge’

you both stopped at the nice lady’s sentence

‘b-but’

‘no it’s okay. its cute to find a boy who’s willing to pay for his girl since that doesnt really happen nowadays. i hope you have a great rest of your date!’

‘it’s not a da-’

‘thank you, maam’

shirabu takes the box and leads you out of there

you smirk and poke his tummy

‘you want to go on a date with me, ken-chan~?’

he turns red and looks away

‘no. it wouldve taken longer to fully explain the situation so just go along with it to make it faster’

you giggled

‘hm sounds fake but okay’

you both continue to walk around the market and even buy a few things like a mini buddha statue or a pair of cat ears for both of you

with everything you bought, shirabu payed with it all

you were pouting as you walked and he noticed so he nudged you with his elbow

‘oi, what’s wrong?’

you crossed your arms

‘hm.. i dont like that ken-chan is buying and spending money for me on things that symbolize our fun. i want to give ken-chan something to remember this day too!’

shirabu grows flustered but hes really confused

youve always been a thoughtful person who tries to be independent but unconsciously ends up depending on others like him

but your thoughts of wanting to do something in return for him just sounds like heaven right now

lmao what a simp

he looks around for a place that could have something that sparked his interest but nothing caught his eye

until he caught a photo booth by the corner

‘oi, n/n-chan, let’s go there’

you followed his finger and you gasped

‘thats perfect, ken-chan! let’s go!’

you drag him to the booth and you giddily enter the coins for the machine to start

but he was starting to think this wasnt a good idea

he was in a cramp space with you pressed against him

but youve always been glomped to his side since yall were kids so what was the difference now?

bc you catching feelings, fool!

‘ken-chan! its starting!’

he finally snaps out of his flustered state and he raises a peace sign with a smile

with all the pictures, there were funny pictures of you and him,

well mainly you

but he was happy to have them w you

‘ken-chan, you know i love you, but when will you fix your hair?’

he glared at you

‘i like it so its staying that way’

you giggled at his attitude

‘okay, ken-chan. at least it would make you stand out in the crowd so i dont have to look for you!’

you hugged his waist and he froze up, suddenly feeling awkward with this familiar position

its okay, shes naturally like this so calm down

dontcrydontcrydontcrydontcry

after your hang out, he didnt even bother going back to studying

he just laid on his bed, looking at the strip of pictures with a fond smile

he was happy that you only showed that true, bright, happy grin to him

it was only for him

and he only showed his to you

bc you were you and you were the greatest thing, next to his parents, that he has in his life

omg that thought

he freezes and the picture falls on his face at that realization

omg, does he like you?

youre a great friend and his best friend and he wants to be your friend forever

but then, he realizes

youd separate one day and youd have a boyfriend and get married and have a family without him

no, he wasnt going to let that happen

he didnt like that thought

and thus, began his crush for you

and you were the same thing too but you noticed it later than him

oof, when this one girl confessed to him at the back of the school, you cried to him when yall got home

‘when ken-chan has a girlfriend, he wont hang out with me anymore! hes not going to be my friend anymore!’

it took some reassurance from him and more from your mom, when you got home, to realize that you liked your best friend

and thus began the skinny love stage

the whole volley team knew of your pining and tbh, they thought yall were dating but you were just like, nah, we friends

if anyone were to look at you, they would think the same thing

but ofc, yall are insecure hormonal teenagers who think that the other doesnt like them and if they confess, they would be rejected and that would ruin their friendship and they would not be friends anymore and they dont think they could handle that so its better to keep the feelings hidden and remain friends bc if theyre happy, theyre happy

oml my entire love life

this continued on until the last year of middle school

bc not only do you suddenly stop being friends, you became rivals

so as volleyball manager, you helped the team with whatever they needed in return of them doing their absolute best and winning the game

the last game of the year, you were slightly confused at the way shirabu was playing bc it wasnt the normal way he sets

before, his sets were so good that he could give it to any player and they would spike perfectly

but now, it was so different due to the simple, almost lazy, and very high tosses

the team was slightly irritated bc they couldnt keep up with the high tosses so they couldnt hit it

in between the sets, during break, you pulled him aside as you wiped off his sweat

‘ken-chan, youre not setting properly to the others. theyre getting angry because it doesnt allow them to spike right.’

he glares at you, with almost manic eyes

‘its their fault for not being able to jump high enough. in order to get a point, the ace must get a high toss to aim a quick spike’

‘but theyre not able to jump that high, ken-chan!’

you whispered, worried that he was going too intense and they would lose the game

all the hard-work the others put in, all to waste

‘i dont care. i must start early and change early so ushijima could hit my sets in the future’

‘but they’re not ushijima, kenjiro!’

you whisper-yelled

‘right now, theres no ushijima, no oikawa, its just you and the team. your team’

he was shook that you used his first name and the way you were actually telling him off

youve never been like that before

but he was blinded by his goal in the future

‘why is he our ace if he couldnt even hit tosses meant for an ace?’

‘because hes not the ace you’re hoping him to be!’

‘kenjiro, listen to me, these boys have worked their asses off for years to even come close to playing against seijoh or shiratorizawa. im going to do everything i can to make that happen and im not going to let them lose just bc you are too busy focusing on the future rather than the present’

with the way he looked at you, you really thought he would listen to you and play the way his team needs him to play

but no, he played the way he thought ushijima needed him to play

in the end, due to the foreign and unfamiliar tosses, they were unable to hit as much points causing them to lose

you could never forget the looks on your fellow classmates, who were also going to graduate this year, as they watched the ball that shirabu tossed, hit the floor right next to them

to say you were pissed was an understatement

you were F U R I O U S ™

you held the hands of the first years as they were devastated at their first loss

but you caught the eye of your ‘friend’ and he was biting his lip in irritation and anger

as your team was walking to their locker room to get changed, you pulled shirabu aside

‘what the hell’

he stared at you

‘we lost. we lost bc they couldnt keep up’

‘kenjiro! are you not listening to yourself?! you lost because you couldnt accept the fact that your teammates arent ushijima wakatoshi! you couldnt accept the fact that they’re not tall enough! strong enough! ace-like enough! and for what?! for the future?! the future where you’re going to set for someone like ushijima?!’

‘i vowed to set for a player like him, y/n! i want to toss a ball to someone as powerful and as talented as him! thats a promise i intend to keep’

you were dumbfounded 

he was acting on his own reasons and selfish intent, even costing them a game, for his preparation in the future

‘i cannot believe you right now. i didnt know you were so selfish, shirabu. of all the years i knew you, you were never like this. so what changed?’

at the almost betrayed look on your face hurt him bc weren’t you always there to help him? to support him? wasnt that the reason you became a manager in the first place? 

‘you dont understand, y/n. i need to change the way i play now because it will greatly benefit me in the future’

honestly, you didnt even know why you were so angry about this

sure, it was volleyball and it was just a game

you had high school to win it again

but maybe it was the fact that he wasn’t being the shirabu you knew

the ken-chan you grew up with and harbored feelings for for years

he was turning to someone that worked not for himself, but for some guy he has never even spoken to

you blinked away the tears and looked off the side, away from his face

‘right. the future. yanno, if youre already like this, i dread to think about how you would act once you get that goal of yours. but i know one thing. im not going to be there to see it happen’

god that last sentence

he felt a piece of his world crumble bc were you saying goodbye? were you leaving him?

‘i cant see you torture yourself into changing into a new person, kenjiro. so good luck finding someone who can’

‘oh yea? well, i dont need you! i’ll be perfectly fine on my own and find someone better than you! youre easily replacable!’

that was a big booboo love

that fight costed him more than a decade of friendship and a few years of love

despite living so closely together, you refused to even acknowledge him and when your parents got together, you’d find some way to be out ofthe house or you’d lock yourself in your room

he tried many times to get to you and even cried to you, begging to not leave him

but you willed strong and you left him alone

omg she handled this so bad and i cant w puberting teenagers

eventually, he got tired of chasing you and was now angry at you for picking a team of people youve only met for a few years over him who’s been there for you since you were 5

he was betrayed, cold, and sad

however,

without each other to be there, you both studied even harder and eventually, you were both able to get into shiratorizawa

initially, you wanted nothing to do w that school since you knew kenjiro was going to be in it and that bastard ushijima wakatoshi was too

um,,, babygurl ushi did nothing to you

but your mother really wanted you to go to a nice school since she wanted you to go to a nice college

since yall werent friends anymore, he didnt know you wouldn’t be in shiratorizawa

so imagine his surprise when he saw you entering his class with the girls uniform on and a completely new hairstyle and hair color and were you wearing makeup?!

lmao she acting like they broke up

anyways, all he knows, is that boys were already looking at you and vying for attention and dear god, he didnt know how to handle that

for the first month of school, youd think you would just be ignoring each other like you did back in middle school

but nope!

somehow, yall were now talking again!

except it was a mean type of talking

you see, shirabu studied as much as he breathed and you were just a naturally smart sister who didnt study as much

but you still were able to make it to the top and currently, you were the 1st in your entire class

‘ara ara? 1st again? better luck next time, shirabu-kun~’

he glared at you from his seat as you passed by with a smug grin

this fueding is giving me vertigo

‘shut up. at least some of us work for our grades’

that was so weak lmao

but you turned around to blink your eyelashes, slightly mocking him

‘eh? are you saying that i’m naturally gifted? yanno, shirabu-kun, naturally gifted people are much better than those who have to work for it. you play with ushijima-senpai, right? so you’d know the difference between you two.’

bringing up ushijima always pained him but he kept repeating it to himself that he was doing it so that he could go to nationals

sensing his silence as defeat, you waved your hand and went back to conversing w your other friends

this continued on again for a while and he was already sick and tired of it

not only was it beginning to get annoying, it was beginning to hurt

he cornered you at your locker

aaaaa kabedon!!!!!!!

‘listen to me and listen well, y/n’

yessir im listening

‘whatever the hell youre doing, cut it out. youre not going to rile me up anymore and im not going to give you the reactions you want. i dont understand why youre doing this to me but you need to stop before i make you’

ohgodyessir

ngl, that tone of his voice was the lowest youve heard and it made you so red bc that was just hot

but you gulped before grinning wolfishly, hand pressed against his chest and the other snaking around his neck

you pulled him down to your level so you could lean close to his ear

‘now you listen to me and listen well, ken-chan, youre not my best friend anymore so you can no longer tell me what to do, kay?’

shirabu was just flustered at the close proximity between your lips and his ears that he completely missed your warning

he only snapped out of it when you walked away, heading towards your next class

you sat in class that day, wondering how to tease him more

clearly, just words wouldnt make him irritated

gurl why you doing this

and you were stumped until you saw a red-haired looking guy accompanied by a gray-haired looking guy coming up to you

ofc you recognized them from the volley team since you’ve,,,,,,maybe seen a few practices

you thought theyd just pass by but they stopped in front of you and you looked up w wide eyes

‘can,,,, i help you?’

‘wow shes cute!’

the red head shouted and you shrunk under the gazes of these tall men

‘sorry about him. im semi eita, second year’

you shook his hand and you introduced yourself before soon finding out this other guy was tendo satori

‘so what do you need me for?’

‘you see, we’re kinda in need of a manager. and i think its better to have a manager who is close to a player in the team. i apologize to say this but i saw you and shirabu-san by the lockers the other day and i think its best to have his girlfriend as our manager’

‘g-girlfriend?!’

you shrieked, shocked that they thought you were

at this mention, you got a flashback from the festival and you soon turned bright red at the label of you being kenjiro’s girlfriend

‘and youre so cute y/n-chan! i can see what our darling kouhai sees in you!’

‘no, you got it all wrong its-’

then you stopped

omg this was the perfect opportunity

no gurl stop jesus take the wheel

shirabu would hate it if you were a manager bc that would give you more room to tease him

holy

then you smiled

‘i accept, senpais. i want to see my baby in action after all’

they were ecstatic since it was a hassle to find a manager who wasnt infatuated w ushijima

you exchanged contacts and soon, you were brought to meet the team

oh boy when kenjiro saw you at the door, he dropped the ball on his head

what in the hell were you doing here

‘guys, this is our new manager!’

you peeked out from tendo and waved at them

‘hello, my name is l/n y/n, first year. and im glad to be your manager’

noticing shirabu’s shocked form, tendo and semi shared a look and interpreted as, hes so happy that his senpais chose his girlfriend for him so now he could show off and play better and that could hopefully turn his attitude to be more grateful and respectful rather than this dismissive and disrespectful behavior

but shirabu was dying inside

oh god, youre totally going to tease him during practice and hes not going to be at his best and hes not going to be able to prove himself to ushijima

‘oi! shirabu-kun! come be grateful to your senpais for letting your darling girlfriend as our manager!’

‘hey baby!’

omg, what

again, you have a loud and expressive personality so you were kinda shameless so you just ran up and hugged him

aaaaa this is so embarassing wth

‘didnt you miss me? oh, youre so cute!’

god, he knows youre only here to spite him

right on point, good sir

ugh you were practically teasing him as the manager and you were having so much fun making him all flustered

but he was also spiteful 

sometimes, he would stick his foot out whenever youd run towards a player and hed laugh at you embarassing yourself in front of them

youd return the favor by accidentally throwing his water bottle at his face

‘oh, gomen, ken-chan’

the entire time, the team was baffled to see the usual stoic and dismissive shirabu so freely laughing and actually teasing you

they think its just for good fun and not the aim of hurting each other since yall are dating and youre just flirting

combined w being academic rivals and now rivals during the team, you both were unintentionally becoming close again

the brutality was slowly simmering to a low heat

and turn the over on at 350 degrees

now, it was just to make each other flustered

the crush that you thought was gone, was slowly digging itself out like the zombies in plants vs zombies

and my god you were annoyed

from now on, you were nothing but rivals and a parasite on his side

him feeling the same

dating would cause too much and the hurtful words would eventually come back up and you concluded that you were just too different

you didnt conclude shit

one time, the team was walking from practice to a nearby convenience store to pick up food

ofc you were picking out a billion foods and you just shoved them all to his arms

‘my darling boyfriend would pay for it because he loves me. ya know what they say, make his pockets hurt’

he glared at you 

‘as far as i remember, i wasnt dating a pig’

ngl, that hurt a little bc hes calling you a fattie

but he still went up to pay for it and you intentionally bumped him with your hips to annoy him but it caused him to drop his wallet to fall

and out came his money and that picture

the picture from nearly 3 years ago

you bent down to pick it up before he could even move 

god, yall were so happy and young back then

it was awkward silent since you didnt give it back and yall walked out of the store and the team was sensing the weird vibe around you two

‘oi, what happened? its so tense!’

‘did you fight?’

‘did you get caught making out by the aisles?’

‘ong shut up, kai!’

yall kai is a third year senpai that i completely made up since we dont get insight on the senpais before ushijima

but the team noticed the weird aura around you two and decided to walk away to give yall some space

‘can-will you hand it over now?’

shirabu mumbled

you nodded and pushed it in his hands

‘why,,,, why do you still have it?’

‘you gave it to me. of course id still have it’

you were silent before coughing

‘can we talk?’

‘its about time we do’

yall walked away from the team towards your home but were taking weird turns and corners to prolong the walk

you looked up to see him and you laughed

‘this is ridiculous. its not fair’

‘what are you talking about?’

he whispered

‘i was so angry at you for saying that you dont need me and that you could easily find someone better because i knew that and i didnt like it. but i was so hurt that it came from your mouth. out of everyone, i would rather die than hear you say that to me. i think thats why ive been like this. i dont know, im being stupid. i was being stupid.’

he stopped walking and clenched his fist while glaring at the ground

‘you told me you were going to leave me. you were telling me that you wouldnt be friends with me anymore. i had to choose between you or volleyball and i wasnt at the right state of mind at that time so i chose incorrectly’

you noticed him not beside you anymore so you went behind him to rest your forehead on his back so he would see you since he preferred to be honest while not looking at you

‘ken-chan, we messed up big time, didnt we?’

his body shook as he laughed

‘i guess we did’

‘it was only over a game. i was so mean and dramatic and ive called you names and said bad stuff about you and im sorry’

‘im not innocent either. i said those words to you and im sorry’

despite slightly making up now, you both knew those feelings would have to wait because you were only getting each other back

‘can we start over, ken-chan?’

‘you want to?’

‘yes’

‘then we will’

omg the whiplash this is giving me

so yall are finally becoming friends and your families are relieved yall made up again bc wowza those dinners were torturous

‘now that they made up, we can go back to planning their wedding’

‘MOM NO!’

slowly but surely, everything has been going steady and your friendship was getting better

but you didnt admit to the club about everything bc again, shirabu was like, ‘i dont feel like explaining everything’

you both still kept a rivalry but it was friendly this time with cute wagers like treat me to milk bread or banana milk

tOOrU oIKaWA’s fAvoRiTE fOod iS MiLK bREaD

he came over often and studied w you and yall would end up actually just watching a movie or watching brain games, unconsciously cuddled up on the couch

however,

this new closeness was doing damage to your heart bc you were again reminded of how much you liked this boy

initially, you thought it would just go away and never be seen again but it said

sIKe biH!

every time you saw him, youd unconsciously sweep away a stray hair and fix it to his weird crooked style

but whenever you do that, shirabu would get a close view of your face and omg you were freaking beautiful

and thats saying something from a guy who saw you through your awkward phase

hes unconsciously touching you more and showing more affection, even more than when yall were young

just being w you was emotionally exhausting as he holds himself back from doing drastic things but he was over it

he was done with all the years of pining for you so finally found the balls to do something about it

you were over at his place to study for exams and he was coming back up with juice

you were slumped over your calculus textbook with your hair in a bun and glasses on wearing his clothes

god theyre practically dating already

‘ken-chan, come help me with this’

he nods and goes to sit behind you

with his tall height, he was able to look over your shoulder and place his chin on it and tbh, you were so frustrated w the problem you didnt care about the closeness

‘you misplaced a decimal so everything got all wrong’

he mumbled

you gasped and made a noise of agreement before changing your answer

he didnt move though, instead wrapping his arms around yourwaist

‘oi, n/n’

‘hm’

this is a familiar scene

‘wanna go to the market tomorrow?’

at the mention of the market you stopped and leaned back

oh god your heart leapt at the feeling of his chest behind you but you composed quickly

‘should we?’

you turned to gauge his reaction at your closeness but he gently smiled

‘yea’

‘okay’

you havent been back to the market together since that day and it was so nostalgic as you both did the things you did back then

from the takoyaki to the stalls

it was so fun

but your heart was beating so fast

his smiling face and thoroughly enjoyed face was doing palpations in your heart

you looked away to stop staring at him and found the photo booth

‘look, ken-chan! the photo booth!’

he chuckled at the thought

‘should we go get another one?’

‘yes! come on!’

you quickly inserted the money and shirabu had flashbacks

but this time it was going to be different

‘okay lets start!’

the first picture, it was a peace sign

the second one was a wacky one

but the next one, was different

‘oi y/n’

‘what?’

the shutter went off just in time of him kissing you

the bright light caused you to close your eyes and you soon forgot what was happening

all you knew you were kissing ken-chan

your best friend

turned enemy

turned friend again

and now,,, were you lovers?

this rollercoaster is quite loopy

he pulled away and rested his forehead against yours

‘im sorry if-’

‘no balls, do it again’

and this time you lunged back for another

and again, this time, not only did you give him another photo, but you also gave him your heart

la fin.

yall what did i just write

[lovinga3characters]

hewwo owo i just binged all of ur a3! stuff nd may i say im in love uwu so i wanted to request smth fluffy with my mans juza, if not much problem where he introduces his bff who's also his crush to the autumn troupe? smth similar to what u did with tenma and the beach prompt 👉👈 hope u have a nice day and take care❤

Thank you for reading so much of my works! I’m happy you like the fluff (uwu)! This request was really fun 👌

Juza 🍰

“Ya don’t have to do this, y’know, just because you’re my...” Juza trailed off, scratching the back of his neck, feeling awkward.

You just smiled at him, bumping into his side playfully. “You’re one of my best friends, big guy, of course I want to meet your acting buddies!”

He sighed, that’s not really what he meant but it seemed that you weren’t going to be discouraged. That’s just the kind of person you were, giving everyone a fair chance, it’s the reason Juza was even close to you in the first place.

There was something about you that made him feel incredibly nervous, yet also at ease. Walking with you side by side, arms brushing occasionally— he looked away from you with a cough.

“If you’re sure.”

“I’m suuure, I’ve already met Taichi anyway!” You replied. You picked up the pace, making Juza fast-walk to keep up. Just from that, he could tell that you were excited.

It made him smile a little.

The both of you arrived in front of the Mankai Theater relatively early, the partly-sunny sky showing it was a little past noon. Juza had told the Autumn Troupe that he had met someone important to him and they had all agreed to meet up to have lunch together!

“... It’s almost... I wonder what they’re... hey, did you guys hear something...?” Four voices could be heard from inside, and when the two entered the room, the rest were sitting on the stage, chatting and waiting patiently.

Well, most of them were patient.

“Damn, that took forever. You’re the one who organized this thing, Hyodo, at least get here on time.” Settsu sneered at him, crossing his arms. Freakin’ annoying.

“I am on time, asshole.” Juza grumbled.

“Ooh, ooh! You!!” Taichi cried out, hopping down from the stage to point at you excitedly. He happily ran up to you and shook your hand rather aggressively. “It’s nice to meet you again!”

Trying to recover from his hyperness, you laughed, shaking his hand. “Hi, it’s nice to formally meet you too!”

Sakyo-san raised an eyebrow, saying, “You’ve met them before, Nanao?”

Taichi nodded. “Yeah, at school! Juza was super weird about it though, he dragged them away before we could even talk.”

You nodded as well in contemplation. “It’s fine, Juza’s just a shy boy!” You chuckled and patted the top of his head.

He didn’t say anything, how could he? Juza remembered that time very well, he remembered Taichi introducing himself with a pickup line, and before he knew it, your wrist was grabbed and he was already walking away with you.

Something just came over him, the rare feeling of what he later spent hours looking up (jealously) crept over him like a tidal wave. Since then, Juza’s tried to avoid that feeling like the plague, not wanting it to affect him so much.

Even though he still couldn’t figure out what he was so bothered by...

“Well then, it’s very nice to meet you. My name is Omi Fushimi.” Omi stepped in. “Thank you for taking care of Juza at school, I know he has troubles sometimes. I’m glad to know he has a nice person like you by his side.”

“You’re such a mom, I swear Omi, you’re making it sound like they’re his playmate.” Settsu shook his head with a chuckle. “Name’s Banri Settsu, I’m the boss.”

“No, you’re not.” Sakyo and Juza both spoke at the same time, he couldn’t help but snort at the idiots offended expression.

“I am Sakyo Furuichi.” Sakyo introduced himself. His face held a serious but curious look, any other person would have been intimated by it.

But not you.

You straightened your back and with a proud grin, you said, “I’m always happy to hang out with my Juza! Plus I’ve heard so many awesome stories about you all! It’s funny, everyone’s like the way he described you.”

Sakyo blinked before glancing at Juza in approval. “I hope so, he has spoke briefly about you as well.”

“That’s true.” Omi agreed. “He could only say that you were nice though...”

“I didn’t know what else to say.” Juza said. It’s more like he couldn’t find a way to describe you.

“It’s okay, I already got everything I needed to know about you from the look on his face... I think.” Taichi wiggled his eyebrows suggestively.

“What do you mean?” You asked.

“Come on, it’s pretty obvious. Even if I wasn’t goin’ off of the way you two act around each other now, it’s the way Hyodo looks at his phone when he’s texting you~” Settsu teased, a cocky smirk on his face.

You blushed and Juza bet that his face looked similar. What were they talking about?

Noticing the looks on their faces, Omi opened his mouth in surprise. “Wait, don’t tell me, you’re not dating?”

“They’re not dating?” Sakyo muttered under his breath, likely wondering if he’d misread the situation.

Meanwhile, Juza froze in place. His eyes narrowed intensely at them, causing poor Taichi to jump in fear, even though he was only doing it because he was trying to think harder. When did they figure out he felt more differently about you than he did anyone else? Did you know?

“No- no we’re not! Dating, I mean, we’re not doing that!” You manage to protest, not so subtlety shooting him some looks he didn’t understand the meaning of.

Juza could only nod quitely as the rest of the Autumn Troupe members whispered among themselves. He only heard ‘oblivious dumbasses’ and ‘let’s do it’ before Sakyo ordered that they all should hurry and leave so they can eat.

This was going to be an interesting afternoon, he was looking forward to it with you.

[scandeniall]

Playing Games

Pairing: Iwaizumi x Reader, mention of akaashi x reader

Request from @mel-melona: hi! I saw that you opened song requests and thought I’d drop one here if you’ve got time. So here’s the vibe, Playing Games by Anna of the North 

wc: 1642

summary: A story in which you and iwaizumi break eachother’s hearts again and again.

Breaking your own heart. It was something Iwaizumi never considered. Throughout the years he’d thought heartbreak was at the hands of others. But, to an extent, he was right. As he scrolled his instagram a simple picture completely shattered his own heart. You had been seated on the lap of none other than ex fukurodani setter, Akaashi Keiji. What stood out even more was the way your hand extended to show the shiny diamond resting on your ring finger You were officially gone, and it was all his fault.

“Let's get married.” It was the first thing you’d ever said to him. You guys were 8 years old. The way You’d ran up to him at recess caught him off guard. The flowers held tight between your fingers couldn't have been for him. The dirt staining your outfit was an indication that you’d just picked the flowers. “No.” It was the first thing he ever said to you. The way your eyes filled with tears made the young boy uncomfortable. However, before he could apologize, or cry because you were crying a voice interrupted. “Iwa-chan, you made them cry.” That was how you wound your way into Iwaizumi’s life, and the first time he broke your heart.  

----

The sun had started to set when the three of you started to make your way home. You stayed after school to watch the practice of Kitagawa Daiichi’s boys volleyball team. Your friends had made the team with ease years ago and as the three of you were almost with junior high you took every chance you could to see your boys play. “You didn’t have to wait on us you know.” You only shrugged. “I like watching you play Iwa. You're really cool” Had the golden hour sun not been illuminating you guys, you might’ve noticed the redness that crept up his ears. “Aren’t I cool too (Y/N),” your third party exclaimed. “You’d be cool if you stopped overworking yourself shittykawa.” You couldn’t help but laugh at the scold, and it was the first time Iwaizumi noticed how amazing the sound was.

“Besides, I’m gonna really miss you guys.” The words came out quietly, both boys brows furrowing with confusion. “I thought you were applying to Aboa Johsai too.” Iwaizumi covered the frantic tone with a cough. He remembered how he blamed it on dirt flying into his mouth. Even at 14, it seemed weird but you let it pass. The reality of what you were able to tell your best friends settling in. “I’m moving to Tokyo after this year ends. I’ll be going to Fukurodani Academy.” That was the first time you broke Iwaizumi’s heart.

----

He promised. He promised he’d only be a phone call away, and that nothing would change. You would talk or text everyday and it would be like nothing changed. The tears that drowned your pillowcase currently made you feel like otherwise. It was halfway through 1st year and not only was it harder to make friends in Tokyo, but you couldn't even turn to your best friend/ After All, he was the reason for the tears.The summer before you left you and Iwaizumi found yourself in your first relationships with one another. Shortly after you admitted that you would be moving after your last year, Iwaizumi admitted to having a crush on you. The awkward conversation consisted of him telling you that he thinks that he likes you. “Or I just really like your laugh and your smile, and jokes.” 

The two of you ended junior high and went into your first years of high school despite living in two different places. The promise of taking the train every weekend to see one another sounded good in the head of two early teens who were still in the honeymoon stage. However, the distance wore and as Iwaizumi and Oikawa began getting more and more involved with one volleyball there was no time for you. “Someone at school confessed to me today. I don’t know how I feel.” The admission not only led to a breakup, but the second time Iwaizumi broke your heart.

----

“Shhhh your parents are home,” you laughed against his lips. You were met with the hands on your hips sliding upwards and fingers beginning to move rapidly along the skin of your waist. The legs you had tangled with his began to twitch and you had to slap your hand over your mouth to keep from laughing loudly at the way Iwaizumi’s hands tickled you. The two of you had made up shortly after your “‘breakup”. If you could even call it a relationship given how young you were. Now halfway through your third year, you tended to travel to Miyagi twice a month to see your childhood friends. You always told your parents that you were staying at your cousin’s for the weekend, however would always sneak out with their help. You tended to find yourself sharing whispered jokes and soft kisses with your first love. 

“Are you sure you have to go back tomorrow,” The groan vibrated against your neck from where Iwaizumi had his lips rested. “We can always just skip school and stay like this.”  Your hands lightly thread through the soft strands. “Our parents would absolutely kill us. Besides I promised I’d help Akaashi, with some science problems tomorrow.” You didn’t notice it but something kin to jealousy flickered through his eyes. It was lightning fast, and he composed himself even faster. The two of you weren’t dating by any means, the distance not being worth it. Those were his words not yours. However, he didn’t know you were that close to the setter. “Is that the setter?” Iwaizumi knew the answer. Afterall, you helped with the volleyball on occasion, and could be seen hanging out with them on snapchat sometimes. Your nod of confirmation only prompted home to continue. “I didn’t know you two were that close.”

“I’ve gotten close with everyone on the team.” He doesn’t miss the way you stress the word and has to force himself not to sound like a jealous asshole. “Besides, he has the same teacher I had last year and I still have those notes.” The warmth on his body fades as you sit up, eyeing him silently. “You know, you two resemble each other. Dark haired, pretty eyed. Handsome. Maybe I do have a type.” The last words come out as a tease. However, at the slightest indication of you being interested in Akaashi, you broke Iwaizumi’s heart for the second time. 

----

Iwaizumi remembered how you cried when he told you that he was going to college in California. Your puffy eyes and reddened face made his heart ache, however he still found you to be the most beautiful person in the world. The night before he left he gave you a necklace. Just a simple silver chain that had been his, but he rarely wore. He told you it was to remember him by and for you to still feel close to him. The two of you promised to keep in contact, an unspoken promise to pick things up one day.

However, that never happened. You’d visited him once down in California and he took you to a few parties, at which he ended up ditching you halfway through the night. It wasn’t intentional, but his new life without you just seemed more appealing. The crack in our heart so tiny it was practically unnoticeable.The following days he’d apologize, with  a gentle caress along your jaw and a sweet kiss to match. Still the two of you had no title. When you returned back home, you’d two worked out a time schedule in which you two would talk. Slowly his calls became less frequent and you found out he’d be out living his new life. Your face time Netflix party dates with Iwaizumi eventually dissipated. As the cracks in your heart continued to grow, you began to find solstice in your old friend Akaashi. However, whenever you seemed to start moving on in your own life, your first love found his way back into your life.

A simple text checking in to tell you that he missed you. To a random call while it was 3 am for him, because he wanted to hear your voice. And then he got too busy again. Too busy to confirm that he was out safe, or to remind you how much he cared. Each time the once tiny crack grew bigger and bigger. Although it was unintentional, his arrival and departure served as a silent reminder to not move on. Too keep waiting on someone who just wasn’t willing to keep you. At least not in the moment.

Eventually texts turned into once a month, and then once every few months, and then only on holidays and birthdays.However, Iwaizumi would miss the subtle mentions of Akaashi and the way the relationship began to blossom. He’d waved it off as the two of you just being friends as his chance slowly diminished. 

----

As Iwaizumi read the caption, he’d found out the two of you had been dating for the last 3 and a half years. You looked so happy. The two of you are 25 now, and he had every intention of returning back home for a while, hoping to reconnect with old friends, including you. As he observed the picture, he picked up a tiny detail that anyone else would have bypassed. Zooming in, he noticed you still wore the silver chain of his. His heart briefly raced, but another look at the way your eyes shined brighter than all the stars in the sky said it all. He had lost you. Maybe not as a friend, but as a lover. For the last time you broke Iwaizumi’s heart.

a/n: i just binged this out and now its 3am but im gonna post it now anyways. This was fun and I hope i did it justice bc obviously this isnt a happy ending type song. But it was also fun to just write. Anyways thank u for requesting and song requests are open: check this post for rules (ish)

[mudwingprince]

agh, fuck it

have a trauma story that fucked me up :)

TW/CW: abuse and manipulation but its really goofed up because i keep yelling about it

oof... i dont even know where to start with this

uuhhhhhhh

well

it started in the beginning of 5th grade

and, there was this kid, lets name him... uh... Dick, thats not his real name, of course

and he said that he liked me in october

and me being the little kid i am whos 'in a relationship' with another kid already (it was just a close friendship, we're not really close anymore cus its awkward, especially after what happened here)

and, after a bit of prodding and a staged little thing where Dick managed to get this other kid to 'break up with me' (wtf it was just a friendship XD), i decided to 'date' him (listen, i hardly knew him and was ABSOLUTELY POSITIVELY NOT ATTRACTED TO HIM)

looking back on that now, that was a huge red flag and JESUS CRIST IM SUCH AN IDIOTTTTT

anyways, a couple days later, we were playing Kiss Marry Kill in the lunch room (god i hate that game, its horrible) aaaand Dick gives me three kids

himself, one of his friends who we'll call... Bob cus he's not really important to the story and like, i cant think of anything else XD and one other kid who literally has nothing to do with this

so i said Marry Dick (i- why did i say that? i didnt mean it XD), Kiss Bob (omg i cant take this seriously anymore help XD) and Kill the other kid

a bit more rounds of that and when we're taken out to recess (ah, the good ol days XD) and as we're leaving i say "I would kiss Bob in a life or death situation" and Dick fucking storms off for no reason???

i mean, that was a logical thing, i would kiss anyone in a life or death situation???

and then when we're at recess and i was fucking around with my little friend group that im in

AND THEN DICK FUCKING STORMS UP AND THEN PULLS ME TO THE SIDE????

and then we get into an entire argument ending with Dick telling me to not talk to Bob

ever

:/

the 'relationship' went on like that for 6 months

six.

fucking.

months.

started in september.

ended in februray.

it was like that the entire time

him pulling me to the side and telling me not to talk to certain people and to say certain things

THERE WAS THIS ONE TIME WHERE HE SAID 'TELL ME THIS THING THAT YOU ALMOST SAID TO BOB' AND I WAS LIKE 'WTF I DIDNT TELL BOB ANYTHING YOU TOLD ME NOT TO???' AND AT THE END OF THE DAY HE TOLD ME TO TELL HIM THAT I LOVED HIM???

AND HE GOT PISSED WHEN I MUMBLED IT BECAUSE I WAS CLEARLY UNCOMFORTABLE

AND I LET IT GO ON LIKE THIS

FOR SIX. FUCKING. MONTHS.

WHAT THE LITERAL FUCK IS WRONG WITH ME XD

but anyways-

i broke up with him by ghosting him for idk how long (he said a week, but im pretty sure it might've been just a day so like :/) but he wound up getting pissed at me saying that if i didnt talk to him that obviously meant that i didnt want to be together with him/s (he was right)

so uh, year goes by, im struggling with my mental health, yatta yatta, stuff happens that im not up for getting into, yatta yatta now im here doing pretty okay

and im preeeetty sure we all know that intrusive thoughts are a fucking asshole to me, especially recently

and how one of them was the constant nagging that someone was Dick and they were my friend (sttiiiiilll not gonna get into specifics cus i still feel like crap about it :/) and i think the reason for that was that one time that he said that he was a good liar *cough* also the fact that he was able to get away with manipulating and abusing me for 6 months

what other things have stuck with me ever since this shit happened...

well my anxiety got worse, so theres that

uhhhh i still blame myself for almost everything that happened here cus i let it go on for this long without stopping it

i dont really have a big interest in musical stuff anymore cus the majority of the times we got into our arguments it was at drama club (i still do the plays, but im not cast anymore, it doesnt have that same ring to it anymore)

ALSO YES, I WAS TEN, YES, IM STILL GAY, NO I DIDNT KNOW THAT I WAS GAY WHEN I WAS TEN

I KNOW THAT I SHOULDNT HAVE BEEN IN A RELATIONSHIP AT TEN BUT IM A FUCKING PEOPLE PLEASER LEAVE ME ALONE >:T

anyways

hOpEd YoU eNjOyEd My TrAuMa StOrY

i might post more of these trauma stories cus i had fun yelling about how much of a dick Dick was

[argylemnwrites]

Looking Back

Pairing: Bryce Lahela x MC (Cassie Vanderfield)

Book: Open Heart (almost 2 years after Chapter 1 of book 2)

Word Count: ~1900

Rating: PG-13 (light language, innuendo)

Summary: A night of celebration causes Cassie and Bryce to take a look back.

Author’s Note: I’m so sorry it’s been so long since I wrote Bryce fic! The pandemic writer’s block was particularly brutal for this couple, but I am pretty happy to be back with our favorite flirty, confident surgeon! This story is for two of the “Things You Said” prompts - 11. Things you said when you were drunk (as requested by @sunnyxdazed, @choicesarehard, and an anon) and 22. Things you said after it was over (as requested by @srta-give-me-my-jax-rl and @omgjasminesimone). It also works for the Choices May Challenge Day 29 prompt (Memories).

“Nah, I’m good,” Bryce said, shaking his head as Jackie attempted to pass him a shot of tequila.

“Lahela, you can’t pass on drinks tonight! We’re celebrating!” she called out, raising her arm and drawing cheers from several others around them, including Cassie.

“You might be celebrating, but I still have to preround at 6 am tomorrow,” Bryce replied, shaking his head as Cassie grabbed the shot glass Jackie kept trying to hand him, throwing it back in rapid succession with the shot Jackie had already given her. Man, tonight was going to get sloppy.

“That’s on you for choosing a specialty with such a long residency,” said Jackie, quirking an eyebrow before downing her own shot. “It’s not our fault you surgeons are so dumb and cocky that you need those extra years of training just to be competent physicians.”

Bryce grinned at her, grabbing the empty shot glasses Cassie handed to him as she reached for a lime. He would let her have that one tonight. After all, it was her graduation night. 

The internal med graduation had been pretty much what Bryce had expected. Decent food, but watered down drinks and boring speeches by the hospital bigwigs, all culminating with the program director going over each resident’s career plans and handing them a certificate. At least Cassie’s table had been a good one with Elijah, Phoebe, and his parents, a med-peds resident named Amber who Bryce didn’t know well but who had been fun to talk to, as was her husband when he wasn’t trying to corral their two year old son, plus Cassie’s parents and Keiki, able to come thanks to Amber only needing two tickets. And thankfully the faculty member assigned to their table was an endocrinologist named Dr. Liz Aubly, not Ethan Ramsey. Bryce had forced more than enough awkward small talk with the man at the monthly diagnostics team dinner he’d gone to with Cassie last week, and he got the feeling Ramsey was not thrilled that he was now officially Cassie’s date for all such events. Over the next two years, with Bryce on his research years while Cassie remained at Edenbrook for her diagnostics fellowship, their paths were going to cross often.

But tonight wasn’t about looking forward, it was about looking back and remembering three years of patients and long hours and crappy coffee and not enough sleep. Now that the formal portion of the graduation was done with, most of the third year IM residents had ditched their families and taken over Donahue’s, celebrating having only two weeks left as residents. It was the only time they all were off at the same time, excluding the annual resident holiday party, since starting residency, and people were letting loose.

“Wait, we didn’t toast to anything with this round,” Elijah noted after he tossed his lime slice onto the growing pile in the middle of the table. After the first couple of rounds, things had turned decidedly sentimental, with the group rotating what event from their three years of residency they were commemorating. So far, they had toasted to adopting their pet turtle Sal Monella, Jackie being named one of next year’s chief residents, Cassie getting reinstated, and swapping out Landry for Aurora as a roommate. 

“You’re right!” Cassie cried out, stumbling off Bryce’s lap. “I’ll go get us another round so we can do things properly.”

Bryce grabbed her wrist, stopping her abruptly. “What?” she asked, her eyes blazing as they locked on his, clearly ready to fight him if he dared to question how much everyone was drinking.

“I’m going with you,” he said with a grin, standing up and subtly sliding his hand down her back, hoping she saw it as a loving, flirty gesture and not an attempt to steady her and keep her upright. Cassie was typically a pretty agreeable drunk, if a little handsy, but she got absolutely livid if anyone implied that her coordination and proprioception were at all impaired by her drinking. He had enough sense not to tell her there was a good chance all the drinks would be ending up on the floor if she did this by herself.

Together, they made their way over to the bar, crowded with dozens of other IM third years. Cassie leaned over the bar, trying to find a free bartender, but quickly abandoned her mission when she wasn’t immediately successful.

“You should do the next toast,” she said, spinning to face Bryce, steadying herself just slightly by leaning back against the bar.

Bryce shrugged, “Nah, tonight’s for you guys. I’m still just a lowly resident for the next four years.”

Cassie grinned, sliding a hand forward and grabbing a belt loop on Bryce’s pants, pulling him toward her. “Where’s all this modesty coming from?”

“Oh, don’t worry. I know I’m still the best surgical resident at Edenbrook. In fact, now that you are moving up in the world, I am losing some competition for best resident in all specialties.”

Cassie laughed, dragging her hand across his hip and sliding it into his back pocket, giving his ass a light squeeze, prompting Bryce to waggle his eyebrows at her.

“I see you’ve reached a very boldly flirty stage of drunk.”

“I’m not drunk,” she scoffed, rolling her eyes, but sliding her other hand into his other pocket at the same time, “I just found a comfortable place to rest my hands. Besides, in a couple of weeks, I’ll officially outrank you, so I gotta enjoy this-” she added, giving him another squeeze for good measure, “-while I still can.”

He chuckled at that. She wasn’t going to be supervising him at all, so it didn’t really matter, but Jackie had taken to teasing Cassie that their relationship was going to become suddenly scandalous and forbidden when Cassie became a fellow. “Are you sure you want to move in together, then? It might be hard to keep your hands to yourself around all of this-” Bryce gestured an open hand up and down in front of his body “-when you have 24/7 access.”

Cassie tilted her head to the side, a coy little smirk forming. “Yeah. You know why?”

“Why?” he asked, humoring her as he lifted a hand to tuck a strand of her dark hair behind her ear.

“Because you helped clean up after that first party in our apartment.”

His hand froze next to her cheek. He’d completely forgotten he’d done that. He’d mainly just been looking for something to do while waiting to say goodnight to Cassie, or rather, hoping he wouldn’t have to say goodnight. Pitching in with cleaning up the trash had just seemed like the natural thing to do. “I can’t believe you remember that.”

“It’s when I knew you were a good person, not just some overconfident hot guy. It’s when I knew you were boyfriend material, not just a casual fling.”

Bryce didn’t quite know how to respond to that. His feelings for Cassie evolved gradually, slowly, naturally over the past three years, going from seeing her as that cute dark-haired medicine intern to the person he loved and trusted most in the world bit-by-bit, day-by-day. He didn’t have some moment with her that was some great epiphany where he realized he wanted more or saw her differently. He just cherished getting to know her better, seeing different sides of her, and adoring nearly everything that he discovered or she revealed. But Cassie had apparently seen depths in him from the start. He wasn’t sure if it put their early hookups in a different light or not, but all he could really do at this point was appreciate that they had come this far together, no matter how they got there. So he gave her a gentle kiss, pulling back as he saw one of the bartenders coming toward them and flagging him down, ordering another round of tequila shots, plus a glass of water for himself.

Soon, they made their way back to the table, Bryce carrying the shots while Cassie focused on not bumping into people. She waited for him to pass around the drinks and sit back down before she plunked herself back onto his lap, looping one arm behind his neck and grabbing one of the shot glasses with her other.

“What are we toasting to this time?” Jackie asked, raising her glass and looking around the table expectantly.

“I have one,” said Bryce, causing Cassie to twist her head to look at him, her eyebrows raised and her pupils blown wide, “To that first party you guys threw at the apartment. It really was the start of everything.”

Everyone clinked their glasses together over the center of the table, with some “Hear hears” and “To the parties” scattered in the mix, but Cassie didn’t throw back her shot right away. Instead, she kept her eyes locked on Bryce’s, offering him a brilliant smile before wrapping her other arm around his neck in a tender hug... and unfortunately dumping her shot of tequila down his neck and under his shirt in the process.

“Oh shit, I’m so sorry!” she cried out once she realized what she’d done.

“It’s fine,” Bryce said with a little shrug, “but I do think that signals the end of the festivities for me.”

“Party pooper!” Elijah yelled out, but Bryce just shook his head. 

“Someone has to actually be functional enough to take care of patients tomorrow, and it’s certainly not going to be anyone else at this table. Cassie, you coming over to my place, or are you going to keep the party going with this crew?”

“Your place,” she said without a moment of hesitation. “I spent the night with you after my first party of residency, so who am I to buck tradition at the last one?” Bryce grinned at that, noticing Elijah just shaking his head out of the corner of his eye before Cassie leaned over and kissed him, sliding her hands along his shoulders before pulling back.

“Get a room,” Jackie said, rolling her eyes.

“I’m trying,” Bryce replied over Cassie’s shoulder. “Come on, babe,” he said, helping Cassie to her feet before standing up and slinging an arm around her waist, waving goodbye to their friends as he navigated her towards the door. 

“I can’t believe I’m basically done with residency,” Cassie said as Bryce pulled out his phone to order a Dryve. “It’s been three years already. How has it been three years?”

Bryce just chuckled, guiding her down the large step off onto the sidewalk as they left the bar. “Time flies when you’re working 80 hours a week for minimum wage, huh?”

“Something like that,” she replied, pivoting to face him and tugging him into a loose hug. 

“Looking back, anything you’d want to change?”

She seemed to ponder that for a moment before shaking her head, “I mean, I probably could have done without the suspension, but I think it helped me grow. I don’t know. I guess even with all the drama, I’m happy with how things turned out. Does that make sense?”

“Yeah, Cassie,” he said, squeezing her tight and running his hand along her spine, “it does.”

Permatag:  @walkerswhiskeygirl   @riley--walker @bebepac @ravenpuff02 @oofchoices @octobereighth @drakewalker04 @kimmiedoo5  @mfackenthal  @thequeenofcronuts  

Open Heart:  @tallulahshh @rookie-ramsey @omgjasminesimone @ao719​

Bryce x MC:    @thequeenchoices​  @fortunatelywaywardsandwich​   @dreaming-of-movies​  @choicesarehard​  @srta-give-me-my-jax-rl​  @maria-soederberg​ @mskaneko​   @sunnyxdazed​

Event Tags: @choicesmaychallenge​ @kinda-iconic​

[og-danny-dorito]

Bucky Barnes SFW Headcanons

a new hyperfixation to avoid my growing anxiety with my personal life? yall already know whats up, and i'm feeling angsty so brace yourself

PUBLISHED :  2 - 17 - 20

S F W : 

- to start off of a positive and happy note (jk you already know thats not how it works) its very likely that upon first meeting, any touch directed towards him is met with an alarmed grunt and/or a slap of your hand away

- anything unsolicited makes him nervous and uncomfortable, so if you really do want to pat his shoulder or hug him or something like that you'd have to ask if it's okay first. now it's pretty easy to see the reasoning behind this but for those doubting it i will explain

- big man has been trained to kill in hand to hand combat and advanced weaponry and countless other things, meaning that he's pretty much wired by this point to have a gut reaction that automatically goes to the fight or flight instinct. it doesn't make logical sense that he wouldn't get uncomfortable and jumpy at loud noises and unsolicited touching since his ptsd has accumulated over the years to MAKE him react like that. he doesn't want to accidentally punch you in the teeth

- like yeah he's all tough and shit and could break the a dude’s neck if he really tried, but the issue is that once his walls are broken down he's sort of akin to that of a regulated killing machine having to redo its wiring to be “normal” again. the transition itself would be traumatic, but the process of initiating it would be even more difficult

- so that means that in the first few months of his recovery, he probably would do a lot of absent-minded staring and just long spells of silence where he just doesn't do anything. it's sort of like a reloading point for his brain, and he starts to pick up the habit of daydreaming a lot. sometimes you'll have to say his name a few times to snap him out of it, but when he does come to he looks a little embarrassed

- it's not that easy to elicit an emotional reaction out of him. you'd have to be fairly close with him to actually get most responses out of him that are more than a word long, and so thus starts my favorite trope; hard depressed kill man falls for person who just Keeps Trying

- it's not that easy to get under his skin, but meeting him somewhere normally and constantly talking to him will probably start to make him feel more encouraged to speak in the sense of making normal conversation

- he's a little awkward so in this case patience goes a long way (as does with pretty much everything with him). it gets to the point where after a month or so he may feel weird if he doesn't talk to you at that specific time of the day. if he's grown that fond of you he'll even go out of his way to ask a few people where you are

- part of him hates getting this attached for a number of reasons. there's that nagging feeling in the back of his mind that his environment is temporary and getting attached to the things and people there will hurt him more than he'd like. while he knows that it's not temporary, that he's not leaving anytime soon and probably won't for a while, it all goes back to the killing machine thing

- when he was under hydra’s control, the only thing that was certain was the base he resided in and it's hard to come out of a state of mind where the only thing you know to be continuous is your continued existence as a tool. the place itself brings back horrible memories, but you get what i mean

- so initially he may resist conversation for that very reason

- he tends to pick up on details more than anything, and most of your smaller traits tend to make him quickly used to you. like for instance, if you're prone to pursuing your lips and narrowing your eyes at something odd you've heard or seen, he might find it cute mentally and then immediately correct himself for it. if you tend to snort a little and roll your eyes when you laugh, he's going to notice that and MAYBE try to pay more attention when something funny is said to hear it again

- i would generally think that he doesn't really have much a type or preference at all. in fact, i'm pretty sure the only thing he seemed consciously aware of that he likes in a partner is ability to understand. cause if you can't forgive him for the things he's done and see why he does what he does now, he can't bring himself to feel like he needs to go through all of his self hatred and doubt more intensely than he already is

- he probably is asexual as well but that's sort of iffy considering he's canon been in sexual relationships so that's a maybe. but he's definitely demiromantic. it's not that easy for him to find people attractive anymore. when he starts to get to know you better he starts feeling some sort of way and picking up on MORE details that you may not even notice yourself

- bucky is also incredibly skilled at remembering things you might've said a month ago and completely forgot about. some find this off putting and that's understandable, but when it comes down to it, its a product of sorta okay memory

- “My cousin almost flipped his car over this week.”

- “Phillipe?”

- “Uh, yeah. How did you...?”

- “You mentioned him two weeks ago... when he almost fell of your roof the week before.”

- “I did?”

- remembers dates, names, eye colors, and a multitude of other things, so sometimes he'll just mention something important you may have forgotten and pretend like he definitely wasn't paying too much attention to you. it's surprising how good his memory is even though he can't remember any of his past. so this most likely means that he has issues with remembering events and how they happened, but not the details of them. like how you can remember your shirt color a few week s back but not what you did while wearing that shirt

- and on that note, he kinda shuts down if he gets a weird flashback in the middle of something. they're mostly triggered by smells and sounds, but sometimes if he sees something while he's walking down the street he'll just stop and stare at it. it's best just to stop and stare at it with him, or alternatively if you don't want stares, act like you're taking a picture. but don't talk to him while it's happening cause it'll interrupt the train of thought and derail him completely

- he tends to talk a lot about things if he's grown very invested in them (he's very good at keeping focus). if you're out walking together or just sitting down he might stare and absentmindedly reach out to touch you before stopping himself at the last minute. gently grabbing his hand and placing it wherever he wanted to touch makes him flustered every time. that and hes super soft but is afraid to be vulnerable around anyone

- just gently grabbing his hand makes him all mushy, and it’s more often than not that he finds himself weak when someone shows pretty much any form of affection or endearment towards him

- probably not into pda though, not that much. he will hold your hand if you want to, but don’t expect to like sit in his lap or like straight upstart kissing in public cause any attention in a public setting makes him nervous

- really likes a kind of homey s/o. someone who likes to cook or bake or whatever makes him feel a little bit like he doesn't have to worry about something for a while. like if he comes home and dinner is just waiting on the table for him or you’ve already drawn a bath for him and/or made the bed or whatever, he literally appreciates that above pretty much anything else

- love language is most likely acts of service. hes not very good with words unless he like thinks it out beforehand, but pretty much buys you gifts all the time because he likes seeing you light up when you see them. he does try to spend as much time as he can with you but either anxiety gets the best of him or hes literally too busy, and so it ends up being more distant with him coming over a few times during the week, even if you live together. and we already know the deal with physical touch so im not gonna restate my strong belief in “big man has trauma no touch big man unless A S K”

- but a lot of the things he does are situational. one day he may be very down to be super affectionate and the other he’ll be painfully distant, but the main issue with all of it is that hes very very bad at communication

- this poses an issue for a number of reasons, but his responses and reactions are more physical than anything. so for instance, if hes uncomfortable with something he’ll start to shift and stare and be very tense the whole time it’s occurring, or if he’s feeling a bit more sad or depressed he’ll isolate himself and consistently stand slouched or look as if he hasn't gotten enough sleep. it’s mostly body language, but after a while he’ll feel safe enough to tell you how he feels about certain things

- this takes a while to actually happen, but when it does he manages to just,,, say things that are on his mind. like you’ll be reading or scrolling through your phone or whatever and he’ll randomly be like “The table has a lot of scratches on it.” it’s just observations he has, but usually it translates to him wanting to change the stated fact. best thing to do is just to roll with it, since hes practically learning how to communicate again and he’s picking up on things socially

- now let's get to the “a little fluffy” and “kinda-already-known” shit, shall we?

-  miscellaneous headcanons;

gets jealous pretty easily in the early stages of your relationship, but only ever indicates this by staring the person in question down and refusing to admit to it later

likes having his hair put up into cool hairstyles and likes colored rubber bands (or hair ties if youre not where i'm from). seriously, he may loose his shit if you just like put cool braids in his hair one day like hes a viking or whatever

kind of tone deaf but his singing is more of like this raspy and slightly more “Misty Mountains” vocals sounding

is touch sensitive, so even doing something as small as like rubbing your thumb on his arm makes his hair raise on end

doesn't like his metal arm at all and quite obviously wears long sleeves all the time to hide it, but occasionally wears short sleeves when he's feeling less insecure

oh, super insecure btw and THATS why he feels all mushy when someone is kind to him because he KNOWS he's a freak and that he's weird but you're not still being sweet??? too pure, must protect

gives great hugs since he practically smothers anyone he meets with them, but is also basically a walking heater

is terrified of the idea of taking care of children or just anything weaker than him, but is good with them since they always hang on his arms and hold his legs when he walks

super strong

likes sweets a whole lot, specifically fruity sweets like apple pie or peach cobbler. never bring those wallmart cakes or whatever near him cause it'll be gone in like an hour flat unless you tell him to leave you some

- in conclusion, he needs therapy and probably won't be very responsive when he's not sure what to do. it doesn't mean he loves you any less, but he may have a hard time communicating it to you. all he really needs is some patience and a bit of understanding, and he'll get better with the whole s/o thing soon enough. cause you mean the world to him, and he doesn't want anyone or anything to make you feel like less than that

[noahhernandez]

2/9/2015 v. 8/11/2020

1:Talk about the first time you watched your favorite movie. My favorite movie is Scream, and it started when I saw the midnight premier of Scream 4 with my dad back when I was in 8th grade, then Scream 1 came on AMC late on night and I just really like it

I still think Scream is one of my favorites, but Halloween has jumped up there just because I am obsessed with all things horror really lol. I started to love Halloween because of the new trilogy.

2:Talk about your first kiss. It’s really not that interesting but really like embarrassing. It was with my first boyfriend and I had just turned 15 and we were at the school just walking around and we went into the band hall and I was like ok im leaving and he was like wait and we kissed and i was like o

the same ! 

3:Talk about the person you’ve had the most intense romantic feelings for. I never really have had intense feelings for anyone. I d k

One my exes- I mean we were dating for awhile so that’s pretty intense to me. 

4:Talk about the thing you regret most so far. I regret… Nothing really I mean, I have done really bad things in my life, but i don’t regret them

I regret failing like 2 semesters of college lmao and almost dropping out. If i didn’t then I would 1- would have been done earlier and 2- would have already completed a year of grad school but IDK also another is wasting lots of money in 2017-2018

5:Talk about the best birthday you’ve had. The best birthday I’ve had was.. Idk This year was was nice I saw Iggy Azalea in concert, then I celebrated my friends’ birthday then mine and it was just everyone got to get together so ya this year my 18th

For my 21st birthday I went to Portland, Oregon and spent the weekend there and it was pretty and my first time there so it was nice despite what I think about PDX now. I don’t even know what I was doing for my 19 and 20th birthday lol. 

6:Talk about the worst birthday you’ve had. My 17th birthday because I was stuck 2 hours away from home with a bunch of nerds doing a band competition 

That is still probably my worst birthday. I forget to mention that I was gone literally from like 7am to midnight. They werent a bunch of loser nerds, they were my friends, but I still wish I was just at home lol. 

7:Talk about your biggest insecurity. I am skinny, but not fit. If I eat anything I get this like stomach and it makes me so sad. and ever since I got a job I work odd hours and I eat a lot of fast food and I’ve gained 10 pounds in 2 years and I guess i’m insecure about my weight

I am still insecure about my weight, and I probably weight like 5 pounds more than I did when I made this post 5 1/2 years ago. 

8:Talk about the thing you are most proud of. We have band banquets for band, and I only went my sophomore and junior year, and seniors give out awards to underclassmen that are just jokes really, and both years 4 different seniors gave me an award for being the biggest gossip in the entire band and I was proud of that lol

Well since then I have graduated both high school and college. I am proud that I finished college !! A BS in Psych. Proud of myself that I got promoted (in 2017) at my job; i’m proud of myself that I have my own apartment, and blah blah basically just doing regular adult shit. 

9:Talk about little things on your body that you like the most. I like my nose because of how perfectly fixed it is. I also really like my freckles/moles/dark marks idk what they are exactly, but they’re on my face and they look great

I still feel the same way about this, maybe add my eyebrows- they’re not like clean and nice they’re just expression markers on my face that i love.

10:Talk about the biggest fight you’ve ever had. I got into a fight with my old friend Angelica and that was almost 4 months ago and we used to be best friends and now we never talk.

When Janett didn’t talk to me all summer of 2019 because I told our other friend Angel something

11:Talk about the best dream you’ve ever had. I cant remember one 12:Talk about the worst dream you’ve ever had. I can’t remember one

13:Talk about the first time you had sex/how you imagine your first time. The closest thing i’ve had to like sex was being locked in a back of an SUV with a stranger drunk as fuck and naked and its embarrassing

Just awkward and nothing to which I expected. 

14:Talk about a vacation. When I was 16, the high school band took a trip to Hawaii, and all my friends were in band so it was great. We did a lot of things, we toured Pearl Harbor and even played a few patriotic songs on the USS Miss. and our hotel was on Wakiki beach. I went snorkeling in some beautiful water and shit and idk just walked all around Hawaii having a great time omg we got on stage at the Hard Rock Cafe and sang with German people i miss it

Hm that was fun. But I.. went to NY with my ex and that was pretty cool because I literally love New York, and I went to NOLA two years ago (today actually) and got miserably drunk so that was fun too 

15:Talk about the time you were most content in life. Probably just in the middle of junior year when everything and everyone was going with the flow

I feel like 2016 was a very content year because I remember nothing about it. 

16:Talk about the best party you’ve ever been to. Idk which one to talk about the one where I had a lot of fun and risked my life or the one where there was a lot of drama stirred up and drank myself to sadness. 

I haven’t really been to a party? I have gone out and had good times. Really anytime my friends and I go out I am having a good time 

17:Talk about someone you want to be friends with. I am already friends with people I want to be friends with

18:Talk about something that happened in elementary school. I kissed a boy on the back of the head and i told I just fell onto his head

Let me think of another one. Back in like fourth grade my friend was in a wheel chair and his backpack was falling from the back and I was trying to grab it and i was only 3 feet tall i couldnt see over or wasnt paying attention and i crashed him right into the bookshelves at the library. 

19:Talk about something that happened in middle school. A girl was mad at me because idk why lol and she pushed me in the hall way and I fucking flew across that hall on the floor and hit the wall she’s pregnant now

When I was in 5th grade (which is considered middle school in my district) I was standing on the play ground and someone threw a stick at my head and it knocked me the fuck out and I was bleeding from my temple.

20:Talk about something that happened in high school. In Jr. Year I was pulling into the parking lot but I was texting and I accidentally put half my car on grass area near the side walk luckily it was 7am and only one person saw me do it lol

One summer going into our senior year we had a party at Michelle’s house. First of all we were very drunk and Coby’s parents were like we are coming over and we cleaned TF UP so fast and sat on the couch and turned on I Know What You Did Last Summer and his parents were like interesting and and left and then we continued to drink anyways- we started playing truth or dare and my friend Angelica was like I dare u to kiss Anthony (someone I had liked prior) and he wouldnt and we started attacking him and calling him homophobic and hitting him with pillows lmao- him and I are still friend-ish

21:Talk about a time you had to turn someone down. I can’t think of something right now.

Literally anyone on grindr.

22:Talk about your worst fear. I’m afraid of having no career and being stuck doing something I hate and living paycheck to paycheck

Yeah, I’m scared of that still but I.. think just like being broke and jobless. RN with the pandemic we aren’t really working and still getting gov’t assistance, so.  IDK being a real real adult scares me a lot. 

23:Talk about a time someone turned you down. I can’t think of a time :)

One time in like 2016 maybe idk - this dude told me to come over and he lived far like not that far maybe 25 minutes lol far for me anyways I got to his apartment and there was a gate code and i asked him what it was and he didnt answer and it was like 2-3am and nobody was coming in or out and so i was like damn this sucks lmao

24:Talk about something someone told you that meant a lot. Nothing really has meant a lot to me. Everyone tells me the same thing over and over again and its so surface level

I still can’t think of anything but I’m sure the friends I have met since this and my friends Faith, Michelle, Peter, and Alisa have said something supportive that meant a lot to me. 

25:Talk about an ex-best friend. Angelica Ramirez. She was my best friend for only 3 years, but together we went through A LOT of shit. We started out senior year just fine, but she lied about a few things and made a lot of us feel like crap in October. I won’t lie, I do miss her. We have too many memories to just forget, too many funny stories and great adventures. She helped me with too much, and sometimes I think about how I cut her out of my life and I mad a bad choice. But only time can heal things and I have moved on and truly found people that won’t make me mad every 30 seconds. 

Brianna Pajak, I don’t remember anything about her except she was poor and we stopped being friends because she always wanted to fight and be annoying. 

26:Talk about things you do when you’re sick. Lay on bed on my computer and watch TV

I normally just suffer and cry about wishing I was healthy again.

27:Talk about your favorite part of someone else’s body. Their…!!>>>??? 

I must have nice hands and ur nose must be nice too! so nose and hands. lol

28:Talk about your fetishes. none

yeah I don’t have any lol not that I can think of. 

29:Talk about what turns you on. Idk i really like kissing and touching and this is awkward. 

30:Talk about what turns you off. bad breath by

that and ugly/rough hands, acne sorry i know it is natural but, shorter than me lol, white people, long hair on guys, and thats about it i think hm i am single yes 

31:Talk about what you think death is like. I think its like idk its scary tho

um idk i dont like thinking about death because i literally want to cry when i think about it. 

32:Talk about a place you remember from your childhood. I remember being in trees a lot

My step grandma’s a lot because my parents were working and she would watch us. She passed away about a month ago :( 

33:Talk about what you do when you are sad. I usually only tell one person and that person is Alisa and I cry sometimes to her and expect her to make things better and she does thank u

I be doing the same thing, I text someone and that person could really be anyone but it happened the other day and I texted Bri and she was very helpful. 

34:Talk about the worst physical pain you’ve endured. I have no idea, I’ve never broken pulled strained twisted fractures or anything i have no life

I still haven’t done any of that stuff to my body. I also have burn scars but I did not feel those when it was happening. I would just say i guess my wisdom teeth coming in because I did not get them removed. I have 3 out lol.

35:Talk about things you wish you could stop doing. Pushing potential love interests away 

I have had some ‘love interests’ since this post, but it’s been about a year now since and I kind of push away the opportunity of getting close to someone. I also need to stop being a bitch sometimes. 

36:Talk about your guilty pleasures. eating 

I would say idk eating was a stupid answer. 

37:Talk about someone you thought you were in love with. never

I was in love and i didn’t ‘think’ I was in love. I don’t know what you mean by talk about them, they were my partner but we broke up hehe.

38:Talk about songs that remind you of certain people. Fireflies by Owl City reminds me of my 7th grade crush Fancy by Iggy Azalea reminds me of my two friends Michelle and Alisa idk anything else

um Idk. i rly cant think  39:Talk about things you wish you’d known earlier. I wish I would have known that

That it’s okay to tell people you’re struggling lol . That is okay to fail sometimes (school).  40:Talk about the end of something in your life. everything is just about to start

When I ended how to get away with murder I wish I never did I love that show with all my heart.