#and now she updated her blog lolol | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

bluemusickid · 2 years

Text

Total Devastation

Pairing: Devin Peters x Fem!Assistant Reader

Warnings: intense language, slightly degrading language, smut (p in v), fingering, slightly dub-con (powerplay), hate sex/hate fucking, slight choking mention/breathplay mention, pretty much shameless PWP at this point, 18+, minors DNI.

A/N: Ok so I saw the cameo and honestly, sans beanie, Cevans looks hot. Like hot. I dunno how well this'll be perceived but I saw the gifs and my eyes went straight to the ring clad hands and I was like 🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤 (this is more of me lusting over his hands than being a fangirl of like 60 seconds of screentime. Cameo Evans strikes again ig🙄) Anywayyyy, I hope you enjoy! (You'll probably not lolol) This is just me being extra horny on main, so yep. Have fun!!!!

I no longer do taglists, if you wish to be notified of my newest updates, pleeeease follow @lexiscyberlibrary , and switch on the notifications! Check out my masterlist for more stories!

My blog is 18+, MINORS DNI. You are responsible for your own media consumption. Please read the warnings before you start reading. I publish my work only on AO3, Tumblr, Wattpad, and nowhere else. I do not give permission to translate or reproduce my work anywhere else. Not beta'ed, any mistakes, grammatical or otherwise are entirely my own.

(Gif creds: the wickedly talented @luvinchris )

You humphed in irritation, as you stood in the Starbucks line for the umpteenth time. Your boss/pain-in-the-ass dictator changed his coffee order for the HUNDREDTH time this week, and he expected you to keep a track of all these changes. The barista looked at you, surprise registering in her eyes as she saw you again.

"I've never seen anyone love coffee as much as you." She said with a slight smile.

You gave her a wry grin. "It's for my boss. He has...varying tastes." You muttered, trying and failing to keep the distaste out of your voice.

She gave a knowing smile, noting down your order. "I guess we all have one to deal with in our life.", As she cast a glance towards a man, seemingly her manager, who was barking orders at a teenager who looked like he wanted the earth to swallow him up. You'll get used to it, kid. You thought to yourself, your mind briefly going to your own boss. Well, not technically your boss, just a part of your work. But a very significant and annoying part. Ugh. Better suck it up and get on with it.

————————

"I asked you to get a coffee from Starbucks, not grow coffee and grind it yourself." You heard him drawl from behind you. Cringing, you turn to him to hand him his weird beverage.

"There was a long queue at the coffee shop, I tried to hurry but-"

"I didn't ask for an explanation, sweetheart. Be better prepared next time."

You bristled, biting back your retort. You'd learnt a hard lesson that one time you sassed him and he made you stand outside the vanity van, in the freezing cold, with just a thin jacket as protection. You shuddered, remembering that terrible time, acting as a retardant to your ire.

"Will do. Is there anything else you want?" You asked through clenched teeth.

"Nothing for now sweets, but stick around cuz i'm sure to need something or the other in this shitty place."

You exited the trailer, heaving a huge sigh of release as you walked to catering. Just a few more weeks. A few more weeks, and you could quit this job brought to you straight from hell.

————————

You were on set the next day, watching him act his scene with his co-star. It was a romantic scene, with the leads getting hot and heavy before being interrupted by the girl's mother.

You saw him get into character, professing his live and affection for his love with an impassioned speech. You snorted. Fancy Devin believing in love. The word 'manwhore' in the dictionary probably had his face next to it.

As you watched the scene unfold, you couldn't help but admire his skills. Begrudgingly, you had to admit that he was a good actor. You watched on as he moved closer to the actress, pulling her to him by her waist. You didn't even realise when your thighs clenched, watching the erotic scene unfold. He kissed her like there was no tomorrow, lips moving over hers softly, yet with a ferocity that had your breath hitching. His lips moved to the column of her neck, his hands grazing her breasts gently. Briefly, you wondered how sex with him would be like. It would be explosive, you were sure. Those hands of his, rings adorning his fingers...you would be lying if you said they weren't a bit of a turn on. If only he weren't such a Grade A asshole. You might've even asked him out.

"Cut! Great shot!" The director boomed, the set buzzing with activity after the shot was finished.

You jumped at the sudden interruption, thankful for it to break you out of your wayward thoughts. Your eyes met Devin's, his mouth slowly quirking up in a salacious grin. You gulped, hoping he hadn't gotten the impression that you were blatantly daydreaming about him. The last thing you needed was him being even more inappropriate around you.

—————————

Clearing out his trailer, you were thankful that he wasn't in there, especially after that weird moment. You prayed that he would stay out till you finished, because working with him would be unnerving, to say the least. Irritating, more like it, you smiled wryly. Two weeks, two weeks. And then you would be free.

"You certainly seem happy for someone who's been slacking off during work hours."

Fuck your luck. It really wasn't on your side. You couldn't take it anymore.

"I've done everything you've asked me to do, even clean your trailer. I don't see how that's called slacking off." Not that you would know what hard work is, you muttered under your breath, hoping he wouldn't hear, what with his nose buried in his phone.

You looked up to see his blue eyes flashing, not leaving yours. Taking a few steps towards you, he stood in front of you, close enough to hear your shallowest of breaths. He was too close.

"I heard that, sweetheart. I think you seem to be under the misconception that you can talk to me like that. I'm your boss, and talk like that? I can make sure that you don't fucking get hired in a 7/11, let alone a fucking movie set. Got that?"

You bristled, his high-handedness causing your temper to flare. Enough was enough. This wasn't worth it. Nothing was worth it.

"I would rather work for the Devil than work for you any more. Not that there's much of a difference; the Devil would probably treat me better than you, with more benefits and a bit of respect!" You snarled, your voice raising with each moment passing.

His eyes flashed dangerously as he walked towards you, you backing away from him till you felt the wall hit your back. You tried moving away, but his hands caged you, his face an inch away from yours.

"Let. Me. Go." You muttered, gritting your teeth.

"Why'd you take up this job if you hate me this much, hmm?" He held your chin with his thumb and forefinger, bringing your eyes to his. They were darker, not flashing with anger but rather something else; something stronger.

"I don't have a rich dad; I actually have to work to pay my bills!" You seethed, as you jerked your head away, out of his grip, trying to move away. It was of no use, he stayed in the same position as before. No amount of money would make you stay with an narcissistic asshole like him.

"All that struggling, sweetheart; when we all know that a few hours ago, you were making eyes at me, practically begging me to fuck you."

Your eyes widened, whipping your head to his. Oh shit. He figured it out.

Gulping, you retorted, "You really need to get your head out of your ass. Not every woman wants to sleep with you. I was observing the scene, doing my job."

"Didn't know your job entailed ogling me, sweets." Moving closer, he touched his nose to yours, thumb grazing your lips.

Your lidded eyes and shallow breaths were not doing a very good job of masking your dislike for him. "In your dreams, Devin. I hate you."

You felt before you saw his right hand on your throat, the cool rings on his fingers a stark contrast to your heated skin. His touch was electric as he slightly increased his pressure, causing you to shudder against him. He saw the reaction and smirked, his lips mere centimeters from yours.

"Right back at ya, sweets." He muttered before his lips crashed on yours, a squeak escaping from your mouth as you tried to push away. You tried to avoid him, but your body won over. You wanted him. But you hated him.

Wrapping your arms around his neck, you pulled him closer, deepening the kiss till there was no space left. You went feral, trying to pour your anger and hatred into that one kiss, biting his lower lip till you were sure you left a mark. He pulled back, grinning wolfishly. "Savage, little minx." He kissed you again, your tongues meeting and intertwining, as he pushed his thigh between your legs, your core brushing up against his jean clad leg ever so slightly.

His hands trailed down your body, squeezing your breasts along the way. You gasped as his fingers molded your puckered nub as he bit down softly through the thin cotton. You groaned, your hands moving to hold onto his head. You were falling under his spell quicker than you anticipated. You wanted to stop this before it became real, but couldn't bring yourself to rid yourself of the delicious feelings he was currently evoking.

Those goddamned hands, the ones you'd found yourself staring at on more than one occasion, wondering how they would feel against your skin; were now making their way into your pants.

The rings he wore felt cool; cool enough to calm the burn you felt at your core. A fire that only he could douse. He pushed aside your panties, his fingers making their way to your core. You moaned as you felt him make his way through your folds, the cool metal stroking your engorged nub. He groaned as he felt you wet and wanting, mirroring how he was feeling, his pants getting tighter and tighter by the minute.

"So ready for me, sweetheart, so. fucking. wet. All that hate, all that fight is all for show, isn't it? You need my cock, don't you?" He asked, his voice scratchy with arousal. You pursed your lips, not willing to admit it. If the bulge in his pants was any indication, he needed you as much as you needed him at that moment. Probably even more. Reaching forward, you grasped his bulge through his pants, stroking him. He growled, pushing his erection into your hand. You stroked him more, increasing your tempo as he pushed himself further into your hold. You could feel him nearing his peak, which is when you pulled away your hand; leaving him hanging.

"Remind me again, who needs who?" You replied saucily, running a thumb over his gorgeous, plump bottom lip.

He growled, pulling your pants down in one sudden move as he buried himself to the hilt inside your wet heat. You gasped, grabbing his biceps as you both relished the feeling of being one.

He waited a moment before pulling out, only to thrust back in again, his cock hitting spots which you'd only read about before. You panted as he thrust into you, his rhythm unfaltering and punishing. Your leg hitched onto his hip, he pulled you down on his cock with a force that knocked the breath out of you, his lips mashing against yours with an intensity which matched his thrusts. Grabbing onto his hair, you tried to match his pace as you felt yourself getting closer to your peak; which he must've picked up on.

Pulling out, he spun you around and bent you over the desk in the vanity, pulling your pants off in one move. Leaving a smack on each exposed cheek, he ran his fingers over your puffy lips, swirling the wetness around as he dipped his fingers inside your intrepid heat. You moaned gutturally, the rings feeling heavenly against your walls. Pulling out his fingers, you heard him taste you as he smacked his lips.

"God, this pussy is fuckin' delicious, minx."

You heard him drop his pants, his thighs snug against yours as he ran his cock over your lips, before pushing inside again. This time, he didn't give you time to adjust; rather began where he left off. His hands gripped your hips tightly, as he dropped his weight on you, pinning you to the table. You couldn't escape the pleasure; it was weaving and bobbing through every crevice of your body. It was almost too intense, your feet on tiptoes as you tried wiggling away from him before the sensations got too intense. But it was of no use; it only served as an impetus for him to go harder and deeper.

"All this show of hate and pride, minx; when we coulda' fucked like this for the whole of the shoot."

"This pretty pussy, was made for me." He growled through clenched teeth.

Your wails were increasing in volume with each thrust, to the point where people could probably hear: but you didn't care. All you cared about was how you were hurtling towards your peak, your legs nearly losing sensation with how you were clenching. His hand moved from your hip to your shoulder, changing his angle so that he was now hitting your front wall square on. You screamed as you reached your peak, rather explosively, the burn and tingle moving through your veins and your body potent. Your walls clenched around him, grasping him tightly as he groaned, nearing his climax too. With a shout, he came inside you, his hot spend filling you up. He stayed inside as he dropped his head between your shoulders, you both trying to catch your breath.

You suddenly remembered where you where, mildly panicking about the situation. It was pretty stupid of you to do something like this on set, especially when anyone could just walk in.

Pushing yourself up, you pushed him off as you pulled on your underwear and pants, cringing at how wet you were. You could feel his spend drip onto your panties, a reminder of exactly how much you'd fucked up. You were about to walk out of the vanity when you felt his hand grab your wrist.

You turned around and faced him, bemused. The last thing you needed was him gloating about this, let alone facing him or making eye contact.

"Leaving so soon, minx? I thought you would've been jumping with joy, now that you've finally gotten what you wanted."

You raised your eyebrow at that, your irritation setting in at his cocky tone.

"Oh enough with that good girl act. You've been trying to fuck me since you took this job. Well, congratulations. You got what you wanted, you lucky minx." He grinned, with ill concealed mirth.

Scoffing, you rolled your eyes. "Like I said, get your head out of your ass. You wanted this more than I did, evidently, what with you jumping me. Face it, this is the first time someone's actually refused your advances, and the great Devin and his ego couldn't handle that. So you did the next best thing- rather, the only thing you could do. Whore yourself out."

He pursed his lips, clearly trying to rein in his anger as he watched you leave the vanity, banging the door on the way out. He couldn't let you get away with talking to him like this, thinking that you had the upper hand. As he allowed himself to cool down, a plan formed in his head.

He would make you pay.

————————————

You reached home after an exhausting and quite frankly, emotionally draining day. But you thanked your lucky stars that in two weeks, you would be free. Free from the clutches of the Devil. To celebrate your freedom and your victory, you opened a good bottle of wine, planning to order Chinese, unwind a bit.

Your phone rang, it was Dinah, your department head.

"Hey, sorry to disturb you, it was kinda important."

"Sure, what's up?"

"Well as you know, we have our night-shoots coming up. I know you said that you weren't too keen on night shifts but it's kind of an emergency. Derek has a family emergency and can't report to work on time, and I need all hands on deck."

You sighed. Night shifts were the worst, but they picked up more money, sometimes double. And you could really use the extra money.

"What do I need to do?"

"Well, for starters, we have night shoots and also some re-shoots now, so your contract will be extended for another two weeks."

You nearly dropped your wine bottle. Another two weeks?!

"Umm...can't we-"

"Oh and also, Devin has asked you to be his PA for the time being. Apparently he was really impressed with your efficiency, and has personally requested for you."

The other shoe dropped as you realised: this was his doing. You bet all the money in your account that Derek had no family emergency.

"Isn't there someone else who can take my place with Devin? I mean, the costume department really needs a lot of help and-"

"I talked to Steph and she says that she can get someone to replace you, no biggie. So I'll see you next week, at 7PM. Byee!"

You made your way to the couch wearily, inwardly screaming at your bad luck. Deep down, you knew it was punishment. And that your victory was shortlived. Because apparently, Devin Peters always won.

Fucking jackass. Well, you would have to find a way to repay him for his generosity. And you hoped it would teach him a lesson. Smirking, you took a swig of your wine.

This should be fun.

——————————————

Lmaooo the ending was not my best, but oh well. It is what it is, ig. Hope y'all liked it, happy holidays!!

500 notes · View notes

juminsmysticmc · 3 years

Note

Hey, it’s me, the one who request the moth headcanon, sorry about the trouble and if it’s okay, instead I would like to see an MC who’s major is digital arts and animation. If not, it’s fine, just have a great day.

RFA + Minor Trio with a Mc who's major is digital arts and animations

Hey! It was no trouble at all! I hope that it’s okay for you tho, I am happy that you could request something different! I hope you enjoy this one too! Have a nice day!

Jumin

Your husband observed you. Ever since he installed a room for you alone in his penthouse, you could finally work from home a bit more.

He hadn’t realized that even before you came into the RFA, he had already worked with you.

Your major, digital arts and animation, was often used for his advertising or other programs.

You often wanted to meet the CEO, but since he always thought that you would be just a gold digger, he always rejected you, just making Jaehee send emails with the things he wanted to have inserted.

Well, today he regretted his choice back then.

Instead, he observed you.

You were working on a new project.

,,How many years did you have to study? I mean, you have so many majors… Design Director, Storyboard Director, I didn’t know, you were multitalented, my love,’’ he praised you.

You even worked a lot with the audio.

You looked up and smiled at your husband.

,,Thank you, my love. I’m trying to make your latest project work. Wanna see?’’ you asked him.

However he knew that your work would be amazing and wanted to have it be a surprise rather than get spoiled.

Zen

Your boyfriend never understood how you could be such a good multitasker.

You could cook, set the table, chat with Jaehee, and even post something on your blog.

But once he saw you at work, he understood.

It had something to do with your job.

You had to work in different kinds of media at the same time.

,,This isn’t just one,’’ you told him and scrolled through your phone.

Your long hair was in your way so you put it away with one hand.

,,I have to work with the sound, video, and stop-motion graphics at the same time. I do this and much more, but I don’t want to annoy you,’’ you laughed as you looked up.

,,You don’t annoy me, Mrs. Director,’’ he laughed and kissed you.

You were even the director of a whole section and helped new students get into the job.

,,Okay, so, see this video?’’ you showed him an animated movie you just got via email.

,,This was made by my students, but she used the wrong program because the audio is slightly separated from the video itself,’’ you told him.

He hadn’t noticed anything at first, but after you told him, he saw it too.

,,And you noticed after a few seconds? You’re amazing!’’ he smiled and looked over your shoulders. You were still cooking.

Yoosung

Your husband wondered why he never saw you or met you since your college wasn’t that far away from his building.

But thank God both of you finally met thanks to the RFA.

He was also amazed by you because you were pretty famous among students.

You even had your own blog and of course you programmed everything yourself.

It looked amazing.

You had every single section working in there, but your point was the digital arts and animation.

,,Did you really have to submit a portfolio to be admitted?’’ he asked you when he read your latest blog.

You nodded at him as you typed something on your keyboard.

,,Mhm, especially to bachelor of fine arts,’’ you told him.

He didn’t quite understand, but he still nodded.

,,I didn’t have to,’’ he mumbled.

,,That’s why it’s written on there. The little word ,,may’’ says that you possibly have to, but not always,’’ you told him, making him sulk.

,,I know what ,,may’’ means… ah, and tell me. What are the admission requirements?’’ he asked you.

You turned your head and looked at him.

,,Can you maybe read the whole post instead of just the keywords? You need to check on the page itself for the requirements. Every university does it differently,’’ you told him and closed the page.

,,Ah. I just wanted to test you,’’ he smiled and looked at you.

He looked so up to you. You always knew what the latest LOLOL update changed in the game. You were amazing...

Jaehee

,,What? You went to Harvard University?’’ Zen asked you. He didn’t know that he was in a group with such an intelligent person and you were even Jaehee’s girlfriend.

You nodded.

,,She’s also very creative. Did you see our advertisement? She did it herself. Pretty amazing, right?!’’ Jaehee said proudly, no one had ever seen her that excited.

You changed her.

You and Jaehee also often went to different festivals to check the latest innovations. It was something even Jaehee was interested in.

And thanks to you, she even understood a few things since you were very good at explaining things.

,,Should we buy this new keyboard? It fits much better than the one you have now in your studio,’’ she told you and admired the keyboard in front of you.

She looked up to you since you were such a hard worker as a owner of a coffee shop and even a designer of word advertisements and 2d animation.

Saeyoung

,,You make pretty good money, huh?’’ he asked you as he looked around.

Your studio just looked so aesthetically pleasing in the middle of Seoul.

You shrugged your shoulders as you kept typing something.

Then you took your pen between your fingers and began to draw something.

You were a storyboard artist.

Saeyoung, your finacé, loved to watch you.

He sometimes even helped you when a program stopped working.

,,Look, which one do you like more?’’ you asked him as you turned your screen towards him to show him a park.

,,Mh, I don’t know. What’s the story? LIke, this one looks cute as if you’re in a fairy tale, but this one looks more realistic,’’ he answered, making you turn the display again.

You nodded and stood up, taking your jacket and facing your fiancé. ,,We are going to the park now,’’ you said and pulled him by the hand.

That’s what he loved about you.

He, too, was someone who would simply do his work, but you wanted to give your best, even at that moment.

At the end of the day, you however, knew which one you would decide on and you were happy that Saeyoung opened your eyes.

Saeran

,,Mc! It’s so nice to see you here!’’ someone said and hugged you.

Saeran observed the person who was so happy to see you.

Both of you were in a foreign country and people still knew you?

You hugged the person who was apparently named Mira.

,,Saeran, this was my teacher, Mira,’’ you said and told Mira about your boyfriend.

She was so happy to see that you got a boyfriend.

,,Have fun here and go visit Josef! He will be happy to see you!’’ she said, meaning your other teacher.

You took Saeran and with him you walked through every department.

,,They try to motivate you to be creative, get started, start your own company, make your own shows, produce medical videos or animations, and they want you to learn things by doing,’’ you explained.

At some point, you arrived at a place that was lit by lights. Students had pencils in their hands and they began to draw something on their papers. This was something that amazed Saeran.

,,I thought it’s digital art,’’ he whispered.

You nodded. ,,They first try to make you get used to it. When you’re ready, you can move to the digital version,’’ you told him and observed the students.

It was a pretty good day and Saeran also enjoyed seeing you presentate something on a stage about your own work in South Korea.

He was proud of you.

Jihyun

Hand in hand, both of you walked into an institute to talk about digital art.

Jihyun also liked art a lot. However, he was a painter.

But your art was also something beautiful in his eyes.

He once tried it, but failed.

,,I remember back then, I also was unsure if digital art was real art, but after I saw it myself… I’m sorry I was like that back then… so don’t give up if people are the same here as in this art institute,’’ he told you.

You nodded.

Your goal was it to teach digital art in that institute and they first invited you to talk about it.

They first invited you in and then they were ready to listen to you.

,,Thank you for your words,’’ the older man said and nodded.

,,However, digital art is, itself, placed under the larger umbrella term new media art that doesn’t require any effort, Mrs. Kim. Digital art is not considered real art,’’ he said and closed his book with the notes.

,,Why did you invite my wife then?’’ Jihyun asked as you watched your dreams get crushed in front of your eyes.

No one dared to say anything. Were you just the laugh stock? Why did you even make the effort? You were ready to give up when Jihyun began to say something again. ,,I can understand you. At first we thought that digital art was easy. Why should we ask a teacher to teach us? I’m an artist myself and I thought like that too, but here too, just like the art with real pens and colors, you need to start with it gradually. I experienced it myself and I was surprised by how difficult it was. I beg you, try at least once to draw a forest in digital art,’’ Jihyun said, begging the person in front of him.

,,Very well, I have been an artist since my twenties and I am now sixty years old,’’ he laughed and took your tablet, ready to draw.

While he was drawing, you did the same on the second tablet and a bit later you all noticed the difference, making them all apologize to you.

,,I can’t thank you enough,’’ you sobbed as both of you walked out of the room, you overjoyed about the good news.

,,I told you not to give up on them. They were just like me,’’ he laughed and kissed your hand before you could both go and pick up Lucy at Jumin’s penthouse.

Vanderwood

When he first saw your room, not Rika’s, but your own home, he was kind of shocked to know that you were almost like Agent 707.

He quickly noticed that just like him, you loved your profession.

It was something that satisfied you immediately ever since you first learned how things worked.

Indeed, animation was attracting more and more people and you were one of them.

,,Back then, when we lived in Japan, we somehow won a sightseeing trip and I got to see the Ghibli studio. I think that that was the moment I fell in love with it,’’ you told him as he looked around.

,,And then? I mean, Japan is one of the best countries to study animation, right?’’ he asked you. Vanderwood was truly interested in it.

He wanted to know everything about you.

The brown haired man wanted to know what made your eyes shine so brightly and why you were so in love with your job.

,,Uhm, yeah. Spain is the best country to study animation, but I also expected it to be Japan. Back then and still today, living there was too expensive. My parents wanted to move back to Korea and so I went to Spain to study my dream,’’ you laughed.

,,I’m amazed. I expected you to go with your parents,’’ he laughed and observed you.

,,I was amazed by myself too, you know? It was a hard decision, but I never regretted what I did. I could fulfil my dream and it’s my life after all.

And knowing more languages is even better because there are so many more opportunities,’’ you laughed.

,,Please never lock the door in other languages like Agent 707,’’

You laughed at his comment. ,,I won’t… but maybe something animated?’’ you teased him.

MASTERLIST 1

MASTERLIST 2

MASTERLIST 3

17.04.2021// 00:18 MEST

141 notes · View notes

layingwithlay · 2 years

Text

All about my blog:

Everyone is welcomed, we respect all races, ethnicities, and pronouns here🏳️‍🌈

I don’t respect or welcome perverts, incest shippers, or SEBACIEL.

I love hearing your thoughts on my posts, respectfully of course;))))

I answer my inbox, I just take a little while bc I’m always at school or depressed just to be blunt.

I am in so many fandoms, I write for only a few though. I write for Batfam, Black butler, AOT, and now blue exorcist, And Umbrella academy since I am now getting obsessed with it again.

I post on Wattpad, A03 and I have many instagrams that you can check out as soon as I feel like linking them.

I also write requested prompts too, usually if it’s in my current interest I’ll write it faster.

I go by She/her but idc if you call me anything else… I rlly don’t care about how I am gendered. Especially online ;))))

I only read off a few blogs rn to be honest, most of them now are black butler fics. Though I barley write black butler now since all my black butlers fic died and I got bored.

Just call me Lay if you would like, message me shout anything pls!!! I love messaging ppl Lolol.

I love reading new fics since I have no life at this point in time;))))))))

Edit 5/2/22: I’ll welcome some fandoms I am familiar ish with to my inbox. All of you are welcome to add something into my inbox but only some will be answered.

5/2/22: I’ll try to make characters as cannon accurate but sometimes I want to lean on a different way that I headcannon they act lolol. It’s FanFictions by a fan so it won’t be accurate.

I don’t use lgbtq+ slurs often and never in a rude way, but I do call ppl a f-g in a loving way to my besties if you didn’t notice.

Edit 6/5/22: Most of what I write are way off then cannon, it’s mostly all fannon and ideas. I do take criticism but I’m going to be honest when I say I don’t take it well in general.

Edit 6/5/22 again: I know my spelling can be horrible, but give me a break lol.

Edit 07/14/22: into umbrella academy now, mostly Stan. So be aware of upcoming rants and random FanFictions.

Edit 08/03/22: Starting school back up again and Im not sure if I’ll be able to keep up with all my stories. So hopefully I’ll be able to at least have some kind of schedule. Also Inbox Is opened for any fandoms now.

Edit 10/08/22: so school is just as busy as I thought, it’s been a good month or so and I still have not been able to produce anything. I’m starting to think I’ll just update anything every break I have. Since that’s when I have time really. Lol.

Edit 02/10/23:So i have been writing when ever and whatever I want, but this summer I will be back in business and have been planning to finish all unupdated fics this summer. So be aware of that.

I’ll add when I think of more!!!

WIP ⚠️

10 notes · View notes

kinktae · 4 years

Text

beyond the story: bitchin’

Hi friends! I hope you are all staying safe and healthy during these tough times! I really wanted to put something out there as a thank you to just how much support Bitchin’ got. You guys really are incredible. So, although this story has come to an end, I wanted to properly close the Bitchin’ chapter by giving you all a behind the scenes look at Bitchin’ and everything that went into writing it. This includes hidden easter eggs, backstories, alternative plot-lines, and a short drabble of the Bitchin’ cast 10 years after the story’s end.

Without further ado, please enjoy and thank you again for all your love. You have all of mine.

CHAPTER ONE – PARTNERS

Ah, yes, the start of this whole wild ride. I’ve always loved the whole nerd/popular person trope in fanfics, so it was only a matter of time before I tried my hand at it too. One thing I was adamant about was not making this a “popular person turns nerd hot/confident/better” fic as its kind of one of my least favorite cliches. With that in mind, and knowing that I was going to allude to TATBILB’s contract, I decided that I wanted Y/N to gain as much from the deal as Jungkook did. No blackmail, no just agreeing for the hell of it – Y/N was going to further herself and her dreams given the opportunity.

The beginning of the chapter is where the two are most separated and dissimilar throughout the whole story. It wasn’t that they were fundamentally different, it was that they approached life differently. Y/N was frustrated at how superficial Jungkook seemed, because she believes there is much more to life than just kicking your feet up and cracking jokes.

On the other hand, Jungkook didn’t understand why Y/N was so tense and on guard. To him, life was meant to enjoy and not take so seriously. Which makes sense, given that he grew up with minimal rules and minimal worries (bare minimum partners wassup !)

“So, do we have a deal? Partners?” There was mischievous timber to his words, the kind that made you feel as if this would all later come back to bite you in the ass.

Pushing that pestering thought away, you took his hand into yours, holding his eyes as you gave it a firm shake.

“Partners.”

God, this bit. I knew from the minute I wrote it that I was writing the ending of bitchin’ along with it. I knew this was exactly how I was going to end this story, bc the word partners has multiple means right? In chapter 1, this meant business partners, but in the final chapter… it means life partners. Idk, I’m just still really happy with this writing decision :D

CHAPTER TWO – THE CONTRACT

Dearest Yara. We meet her in chapter two don’t we? Yara is completely based off of my irl best friend Yara who is a writer and who helped me A LOT with this story. She was my biggest supporter throughout figuring out this crazy plot. It was initially only about seven parts, but with her help I managed to bump it up to 10! Everybody say thank you Yaraaaa.

You were angry, that much was evident to her. Yara was sat in your shared dorm’s living room, a thick blanket engulfing her small frame. You briefly glanced towards the TV, it was tuned into MTV, the familiar music video of Every Breath You Take by The Police playing, before directing your glare back onto the copper-haired girl.

The song reference is a direct allusion to writer Yara’s fic, which is one of my favorite fics by her. She was actively writing it around the start of our friendship so it only felt right to pay respects to her. The introduction of her character felt necessary imo bc I wanted to make sure Y/N had a life outside Jungkook. Plus, I got to use the scenes between the two girls as a way to reference the music and culture scene. Yara is especially a fan of the powerful women in the music industry at the time, i.e., Madonna, Annie Lennox, Cyndi Laupner, etc.) Yara is a raging feminist and believer in sexual freedom and libery for women, we do in fact have to stan.

“How old do you think your sister is?”

“Hey, don’t sass me. For your information, Lyanna still has all her Care Bear tapes. She threw a hissy fit when my mom tried to give them away last Christmas.” Yara recalled.

Lyanna is one of writer Yara’s past pseudonyms. She always used to joke about how whenever she read it, it was confusing because there was Y/N, Yara and Lyanna, which were technically all her lolol.

FUNNY STORY ABOUT THE CONTRACT I INSERTED INTO THIS PICTURE… Twitter found it and made it into somewhat of a meme because no one knew it came from a fic rip. I was actually rly embarrassed and even wrote some posts about how much twitter scared me on my blog LMAO. but THEN weirdly enough, I actually stumbled upon a small community on twitter who actually found my fic and would TWEET ABOUT IT!!! LIKE REACTIONS TO EACH UPDATE!!! I wish I could go back in time and remember how giddy I was the first time I found a tweet about my fic. The fanfic community on twitter gave me a new love for the site (which I had previously had removed myself from because of its toxicity) and I have met so many wonderful people because of it. People even made themselves a little twitter group chat to talk about my fics, and now we are all friends! I miss posting a chapter of bitchin’ and refreshing my twitter feed as all my mutuals would post memes and live tweet their reactions. God that made me so fucking happy.

CHAPTER THREE – THE ROLLERSKATING DATE

I love the bickering in this chapter, because unlike the bickering in the first chapter, it’s actually less hostile and more playful. Y/N is slowly letting her guard down to the very persistently charming Jungkook.

“Woah. Family of six, huh? So you have siblings then.” He noted.

“Yep. Three.”

“Tell me about them.”

Looking up from where you were slipping on your second skate, you met Jungkook’s eyes, surprised to see genuine interest in them.

I actually originally had Y/N brush him off here. I was going to wait until the drunk party scene for Y/N to open up about her family and relationship with her sisters. But then I kind of thought to myself… Why? Y/N made peace with it and doesn’t hold onto those insecurities anymore. And objectively, Jungkook hasn’t proven himself to be a bad person so… I let Y/N open herself up to him.

“Then there’s the twins, Rosa and Lia.”

“Hold on. Twins? Wait… did they go to our high school?” Jungkook asked, his interest in this conversation doubled.

“Yep. They were two grades above us.” You confirmed.

“Oh shit, yeah, I remember your sisters, they were mad hot.” Jungkook let out a low whistle, before stiffening, flashing you an apologetic look. “Uh, in a totally non-meathead way.”

You offered the scared-looking boy a small smile, shaking your head.

Some of y’all notice but, Rosa and Lia are a blatant homage to my name: Roselia. ACTUALLY some form of my name can be found in every one of the rewind series fics, including upcoming ones. I’ll give a cookie to whoever can find every single mention hehe.

“I told you it was dumb.” You laughed nervously.

It wasn’t that you cared much about what Jungkook thought but you had a feeling a guy like him, who was popular and carefree, wouldn’t be able to sympathize in the way you would like him to.

“No, I’m just… surprised, that’s all.”

Jungkook certainly was surprised. You had built up quite the impression on him from the very moment you two met. It was hard to imagine that the girl who was so unapologetically herself was ever unsure or insecure.

Somehow, the idea tugged at his heart, as if he understood you more if only just a little.

From the get go, Jungkook was extremely drawn to just how confident and secure Y/N was in herself. I knew I wanted Y/N to be unapologetically sure of herself and in her abilities. Something I didn’t want, however, was for frat boy!jungkook’s only personality traits to be liking sex and being a cocky bastard (although I am a big consumer of that trope heh). Jungkook is actually canonly incredibly insecure. He lacks a real sense of self, which is why he is so desperate for Kiri back. His relationship with Kiri at that time was a big part of what he thought was himself. He has somewhat of low self esteem tbh which is why he’ll go back to a woman who treated him unfairly. That’s why he comes off the way he does in the first chapter and why Y/N thinks he has a big ego... he’s overcompensating. He finds it so endlessly fascinating that Y/N, in all her confident glory, was actually once super insecure. He admires her all the more once she opens up about her past.

“Oh, Rosa is an intern for our hometown’s newspaper but between you and me those assholes don’t even let her write. She does coffee and burger runs for men in charge. And Lia sells ice cream at the mall.”

“What about your brother?” Jungkook asked.

“He’s training to be a cop just like my dad.”

“And your mom?”

“She works at a convenience store.”

All their careers resemble people in the latest Stranger Things season (Nancy, Steve, Hopper, and Joyce). Fun Cameo there.

“What’s wrong?” You wondered, following his eyes.

“October 16th, 1985. 6:48PM.”

“Yes. That’s today’s date and time. What about it?” You pressed, growing confused.

“Remember it.” He warned.

“Why?”

“It’s when I fell in love with you.”

This iconic line I actually got from the real Jeon Jungkook himself. While Jungkook wasn’t actually in love with Y/N here, it certainly was a cute way for him to express his admiration for her.

OH HERE’S A FUN FACT: the hickey scene at the end of this chapter where JK and Y/N kiss for the first time was actually supposed to be Yara giving Y/N the hickey like the best friend she is. Ultimately I went with JK giving it for... smut purposes... ≖‿≖

CHAPTER FOUR – THE HALLOWEEN PARTY

The decision for Y/N to be Freddie Krueger came from me planning to be him for Halloween. And I was! JK as Glen Lantz just followed naturally. I’ve seen some great edits of him as the character. Truly chef’s kiss.

I really liked that Jungkook came over to the girl’s dorm to get ready. I didn’t want a scene where Y/N was thrown into a situation she was uncomfortable with which is how much Nerd At A Party Scene go so made sure Jungkook stayed by her side throughout the part, going out of his way to introducing her to the people he cared about.

Tae’s character came in when I realized I needed a way to actually put Y/N’s event in motion. He was the missing link and BOY did you guys eat his character right up huh. Love that for me.

Another thing, the confrontation with Kiri was so hard to write guys, I reeaaaally struggle with girl conflict. GIRLS SHOULD SUPPORT GIRLS. However, not everyone gets along in real life so I went with Kiri being more along the lines of petty rather than outwardly a cunt to Y/N. Realistically, Kiri is popular and well liked among the greek life so being unkind to someone she hardly knows wouldn’t make sense. There’s definitely tension between these two but I tried my best to steer away from the typical cat fight/revenge porn/public humiliation trope most movies seem to follow.

CHAPTER FIVE – THE FIRST TIME

Introduction to Erik!!!! It was really important to me that Y/N had a life before Jungkook. That's why I wrote in Y/N having a fiancé. She’s not opposed to love, she just has reshifted her focus. She knows what she wants and is choosing to focus on that, which why when she realizes she’s falling for Kookie she’s so hesitant to admit it because she’s fallen down that road before. Even though Jungkook treats her with respect and acknowledges the parts of her she’s most proud of, she just isn’t willing to possibly give up her passions for love. Which is why she doesn’t immediately confess to him, even once she’s sure she loves him.

“I’m serious, nerd. You’re like… um… the sun!” Jungkook marveled, eyes growing full as the realization dawned on him.

“The sun?” You laughed.

“Yeah, like… you’re this bright, beautiful thing that seems like it’s here in front of me but is really light-years away.”

Jungkook was drunk, and although you were sure he was making more sense in his head, you couldn’t help but feel your face grow hot, unsure of how to react to his drunk analogy.

“You’re the sun, Y/N. You make the world turn for you. Never orbit for anyone else.”

And suddenly, you were kissing him, for no other reason other than you wanted to and that it felt like the right thing to do.

No real commentary here. Just love this bit. It’s probably my favorite interaction between them two ‧⁺◟( ᵒ̴̶̷̥́ ·̫ ᵒ̴̶̷̣̥̀ )

“Also… She’s, uh, currently dating Eunwoo.” You told Yara.

Your best friend blinked, silence falling over her.

“Yara?”

“Good for her.” She perked up almost forcibly. “Let her put up with his annoying ass.”

Yara could see the way your expression had turned dubious as if you didn’t believe her nonchalant act.

Yara turned up her nose defensively, “What?”

Ugh yes, some character development from Yara.... the flavor ! Yara (much like Y/N and JK) also struggles with love. She has a real fear of commitment and if far more comfortable with casual sex than relationships. She did develop actual feelings for Eunwoo, she just wasn’t ready for that kind of commitment so she cut him off. Fleed the scene if you will. Typical gemini smh my head.

"I don’t think the contract mentioned orgasms.” Jungkook smirked as you released his thumb.

“I say we let it slide.” You shrugged, leaning into him casually.

“You think?”

“Totally. Think of it as… a bonding activity.” You joked, resting your chin on his shoulder, peering up through your lashes.

“Damn, we’re really committed to this fake dating thing, huh.”

You laughed in the way that you hated, but Jungkook loved; it was loud and abrupt, but it genuine, and it was you.

“What can I say, I’m a method actor.” You sighed dramatically, causing Jungkook to grin before pressing a kiss to your nose, simply because he liked the way it always seemed to make you smile.

GOD THEY’RE SO WHIPPED FOR EACH OTHER ITS DISGUSTING!!!!!! I’m really happy I decided not to make sleeping together a big deal and I got a lot of feedback from you guys agreeing! I had a lot of fun with these two’s sex scenes knowing they could do it whenever they wanted.

CHAPTER SIX – THE STEM EVENT

I started the scene with smut BUT I wanted to point out that much of their time spent together is at Y/N dorm, Jungkook either napping, hanging out or doing work as Y/N would study like she always did. I liked the idea that Jungkook would get bored and would want attention from Y/N because she was so focused. Idk, I just wanted to write a love story about two people spending time together and figuring out how they fit in each other’s lives as opposed to some dramatic I mEeT HiM aNd mY LiFe bEcAmE cRaZy. There’s nothing wrong with that plot line, I just didn’t want that for these two dorks. I wanted Y/N to interact with JK’s scene and crowd but not give up her own which is why most days JK and her just lounged around in her dorm studying.

Also, I don’t know how the teacher/student roleplay made it into the smut, it just did, no further questions (ʃ⌣́_⌣́ƪ).

Then the event scene.

“You’re whipped, dude! Seriously.”

Jungkook felt his face go red, “Shut up, no, I’m not.”

“Hey, I’m not judging. I get it. That’s your girl.” Taehyung shrugged. Jungkook placed a hand on the fold up table in front of him, staring down at the information pamphlet you had worked so hard on.

“She’s just… so fucking driven and passionate about everything she does. Sometimes I look at her, and I’m just like… holy shit, what am I doing with a girl like her? I feel like she’s totally out of my league and being with me is holding her back but— I dunno, man. I just… really like her.” Jungkook revealed, voice growing small.

An unexpected wave of tenderness fell over the two boys, Taehyung throwing an arm over his little brother’s shoulder.

“I’m happy for you, bro.”

Jungkook didn’t know it just yet but dude was talking from the heart and, is in fact, totally whipped :’c

I loved the confrontation scene between the boys and Eunwoo because the boys standing up for Yara really did make everyone feel like a friend group, not just some character who happen to exist at the same time. It wasn’t just Y/N and Yara and one side and the boys on the other. They would all become friends, which is ideal to me. A boyfriend who likes your best friend and considers her a friend so you can all hang out??? Yes please.

Initially, irl Yara and I had noooo clue if Yara would end up with Eunwoo or not. That was actually the original goal actually. But after this chapter four, you guys made it ABUNDANTLY clear that you guys wanted to see Taeyara, despite the two never even meeting! Honestly, it wasn’t until this chapter was written that we decided for sure that Eunwoo was out of the picture for Yara. Part of me really wanted to keep Yara single, but irl Yara insisted on dick and frankly, she’s right. Bitchin’ Yara deserved a shot at love. She definitely has her own story outside of Bitchin’ and will experience a lot of growth in the future.

“God, I know. I do not miss that temper of his.” She chuckled, her words piquing your interest.

“Temper?”

“Oh, yeah. Have you seriously not experienced it yet? He’s got some gnarly anger issues. Not to mention all the lying…” Kiri paused suddenly, straightening up as she flashed you an apologetic look. “Yikes, I’m sorry. I totally should not be telling you this. I’m not trying to be that gross girl that shit talks her ex to his current girlfriend.”

Miss Kiri, Miss Kiri. She really acted up this chapter didn’t she. There was a lot of discussion about whether or not those things she said about Jungkook were true. Which was exactly what I wanted hehe. We come to find out that Kiri had definitely stretched the truth. She really is good at manipulation and understanding how people think and it’s why she is in the role that she is in. Messy queen.

CHAPTER SEVEN – THE ROOFTOP DATE

This entire chapter was inspired by High School Musical with Troy and Gabriella’s rooftop garden scenes. This was my shortest chapter and honestly, probably not my strongest. I definitely went into writing this with zero concept of what I actually wanted to happen. Usually when I write my chapters I have a 4k long outline of it beforehand that I go off of. Not this one though. I really just winged it and I tried my best to write a chapter that really showed off (dialogue wise) just how this couple bounces off each other. I do really like some of the banter they have in this chapter.

You had taken note a little wooden popsicle stick poking up from the soil of the yellow flowers. Acacias, they were marked. Pulling your knees up to your chest, you considered his words.

Yellow acacias stands the value of true friendship and can indicate a secret love! I thought that was very appropriate given these dummies' relationship.

“So, you probably know why I brought you here.”

You nodded.

“You’re proposing, right?”

“Yeah, I– oh, shut up.” He laughed, the serious mood shattering as you joined him.

Even though I knew they were going to have a semi serious talk, what with Y/N asking about what Kiri had told her, these two dufuses realistically are just too comfortable with each other to stay serious for too long.

“Hey, I said that out of frustration, I didn’t really mean it. I’m sure she’ll come crawling back soon.” You attempted to comfort him, hoping to sound sincere.

“Even if that’s true, I’m not entirely sure I want that anymore.”

“What?” You blinked. Jungkook shrugged.

“What about us?” He met your eyes, causing your breath to hitch.

“What about us?”

Jungkook stared at you for a moment, noting the way the timber in your voice had become higher pitched as if panicked.

MORE FUN FACTS LMFAO: I typically do this thing with unplanned chapters where I just go for it and write and usually it works out. But when I wrote this down I remember stopping and being like ??? WHY DID I JUST WRITE THAT ??? I don’t like deleting my writing so I had a serious think to myself about whether this was going to be the moment Jungkook confessed or not.

Canonly, I decided that Jungkook did in fact mean ‘us’ in a romantic sense, but because of the way you perceivably panicked at that possible meaning, he decided against taking the conversation in that direction, instead speaking about ‘us’ in a platonic sense. Poor kookie :(

“Stop. Listen to me, Jungkook, you’re a fucking great guy, okay? You’re charismatic and funny and care about your friends… sure, you almost ruined my event, but it was mostly to defend my best friend when Eunwoo got too pushy, right? You’re a good guy, meathead. I know I joke about your ego, but I really believe you’re capable of more than you think you are. Seriously, Kiri is so lucky to be the object of your affection.”

Jungkook watched the way the sun’s orange light kissed your face, a bittersweet feeling growing in his chest as he contemplated the object of his affection. Just a couple of months ago, he would have had no doubt about who held his heart, but as you held his stare, he found himself unsure and yet, entirely sure all the same.

“Jungkook? You okay?” You frowned, catching in the sadness in his eyes.

“Hm? Yeah, yeah. I just… realized something.”

“Oh? What’s that?”

“…It doesn’t matter.” He smiled, the gesture hardly reaching his eyes.

It’s in this moment that Jungkook decides that there is no way you hold the same affection towards him that he does to you. He mistakes your words of comfort as you pushing him away. You are so kind and encouraging and Jungkook loves you so much that hearing you insist about him ending back up with Kiri hurts him so bad.

But you are still unsure about your feelings and genuinely believe that's still what Jungkook wants. You’re just being a supportive friend!! :( It isn’t until the end of this chapter when Y/N has her talk with Yara that she realizes, oh man, she’s in deep.

CHAPTER EIGHT – THE MISTAKE

BLAH. This chapter is so BLAH, you know? Having to write this chapter was SO HARD. I texted irl Yara complaining about how much I hated having to put my characters through this and that I wanted to just end the story on chapter 7 and keep them happy forever. BUT ALAS! I had planned for this to happen from the start.

You tasted like the mint of your favorite brand of toothpaste. He imagined if he had caught you any later then the mint would have been accompanied by the taste of coffee, knowing the way you rarely started a day without a cup.

God, he had missed the taste of you.

What you guys didn’t see is Jungkook spending the night with Kiri, and immediately kicking her out, freaking out as the weight of guilt washed over him. He knew he had done nothing wrong, that you weren’t his real girlfriend, and that getting back together with Kiri was exactly what he had signed up for. It was what he should’ve wanted. But it wasn't… because you were what he wanted. And that was exactly what he was going to tell you as he marched over to your apartment.

But he panicked. His mind already decided that your answer to him would be no– that you didn’t feel the same. So he kissed you. He had you in the only way he was allowed to. He was selfish and impulsive and so incredibly scared that he ended up hurting the person he loved the most.

Initially though, I had Jungkook get back together with Kiri, not that he slept with her right before sleeping with Y/N. But I decided TEEHEE let me just make everything erupt into flames. However, I didn’t realize just how angry with Jungkook you guys would get. I remember thinking DAMMIT WAS THAT TOO SCANDALOUS?? I knew I was going to have to work hard for Jungkook to redeem himself to my readers.

“She wants to get back together.” Jungkook swallowed dryly, eyes wavering between yours as if to gauge your reaction.

“…Oh.”

You shook your head.

“I mean, wow! That’s… That’s great!” You smiled, something tearing apart inside you as the words left your lips.

“Y/N–”

“Seriously! This means it worked, right? This is exactly what you wanted to happen.” You enthused, turning your head so that he couldn’t see the way your eyes had welled up.

Jungkook’s heart was pounding in his ears, fighting the urge to wrap his arms around you.

“Yeah… yeah, no, you’re right. We did it.” He replied monotonously.

GOD THIS PART IS SO UNBELIEVABLY FRUSTRATING! JUST ADMIT YOU LOVE EACH OTHER YOU MORONS! This entire situation is so convoluted because there's so much information missing and not being expressed, I seriously want to ring my own neck rereading this bit.

“Are you mad?” He called out cautiously, a heavy feeling falling onto his chest.

“Why would I be mad?” You quipped back sharply, causing Jungkook to flinch. He shifted in his seat uncomfortably.

“I just thought… I mean we’ve been fooling around a lot lately, so I didn’t know if—”

“If what? I had feelings for you?” You scoffed. “Please, as if I’d ever fall for you.”

And there it was— everything Jungkook already knew but had been so afraid to hear. Of course, you didn’t feel for him what he felt for you. How could he have expected anything different?

IDIOTS!!! THEY'RE BOTH IDIOTS!!! I don't know how y'all put up with this for so long. Forgive me.

CHAPTER NINE – THE BREAK

Okay I actually love this chapter. And for many reasons. Let me break down the three scenes for you guys.

Scene one: Kiri confrontation

Kiri is definitely an opposing antagonist. She is constantly working against Y/N because of their interests directly conflicting. BUT. I would argue that the biggest antagonist to this story is the inner ones – Y/N and Jungkook's lack of ability to admit their feelings constantly holding them both back from their happy ending. That being said, a confrontation scene between Y/N and Kiri was MUCH needed. While I suppose I can understand why Kiri doesn't like Y/N, that doesn't change the fact that she has been disrespectful and catty. So miss Y/N had to put Miss Kiri in her place (•̀ᴗ•́)

Scene two: Yara and Tae at the library

Fanservice. That is all. LMFAOOO y'all reallllyyy wanted it to happen and who am I to deny my people what they want. It was really fun getting to explore my side characters and develop them through interactions outside the two main characters. IRL Yara also mentioned giving bitchin’ Yara and Tae their own chapter as a joke and I was like LOL BET. I fully was going to but then I got the idea for the next scene and was like ahh ok maybe not the whole chapter.

Scene three: Meeting with Erik

So. This was a SUPER last minute decision. Like, it wasn’t until I was writing this chapter that I planned on Erik making an appearance. I saw a tweet with someone saying their bitchin theories and they mentioned Erik appearing out of nowhere and I was like,,, HOLD ON!!!! That could be kind of spicy ≖‿≖

I knew for a fact JK was NOT going to be forgiven in this chapter; I needed a way to lay the situation out between the two dorks without trying to seem like I was trying to sway my audience in a way that didn't make sense to the story. Y/N was rightfully angry. But she wasn't only angry about the timing of the sex. She was angry that Jungkook went back to Kiri at all and there was no way she was going to admit that. So who better to lay it all out than calculated, unbiased third party Erik. He deserved some character development after all.

I also liked the idea that Y/N had, in theory, “romantic options.” Losing Jungkook didn’t mean the end of her life. Having my female lead stand on her own was very important to me.

CHAPTER TEN – THE END

RIGHT OF THE BAT I needed Jungkook to suffer. So that whole scene where he tries to interact with his old group only for his presence to make everything awkward MMMM yes, sweet revenge on my part.

You were surprised. His hair was no longer shaggy and long like you remembered it. Instead, it had been freshly cut, looking healthy and neatly styled for the first time since you met Jungkook.

THE WAY SO MANY PEOPLE COMMENTED ON THIS LINE “but Y/N liked it long?!?” IS SO FUNNNYyyyy. So let me clarify a thing. Jungkook had always wanted to cut his hair right. The only reason he didn’t was because Y/N told him not to. With Y/N no longer in the picture to convince him out of it, he cut his hair. That’s really all there is to it skfjsjf.

You know, I had written this part around the time I had just finished up the third ch believe it or not. And it was COMPLETELY different. I had it planned that Yara and Y/N ignored him throughout class and Yara had gone back after the bell rang to go verbally assault JK. And as the two hashed it out, only then was that when Jungkook would realize that he liked Y/N after Yara literally spelled it out for him.

“You like her, dumbass!” Was what I had written Yara saying. I really had written him in denial for ten chapters, I was a whole sociopath (╥﹏╥). But ultimately, I decided that Jungkook came to that conclusion on his own and the decision to apologize to Y/N would have been made over winter break.

“You said Kiri came over asking for you back, yet you still came over and slept with me the next day. Even though the two of you had sex the night before. Do you understand how that makes me feel?”

“I’m—”

“Like garbage!" You emphasized, the white paint of the door somehow irritating you further. "I felt like I was something you threw away and picked back up whenever you felt like getting your dick wet.”

Your chest was rising and falling rapidly, and you tried your hardest to not let your emotions get the best of you.

“Not to mention to everyone else, it looks like you cheated on me. Which makes me look like a fucking idiot." You scoffed.

Jungkook said nothing in reply, which somehow made it easier to say all you should have said that day in your room.

“It just sucks to realize that someone you once cared about sees you as nothing more than a toy. It fucking sucks.”

Man :( writing this hurt my heart. I really, really, love bitchin!y/n and writing her hurting freaking stinks. But she had to speak her mind. She deserves the chance to get everything off her chest with the way Jungkook hurt her.

Your heart and mind were in constant paradox, torn between wanting him back and wanting him to know just how much he had hurt you. Your mind ultimately won the battle, of course, but as Jungkook stood just a few inches of drywood apart pouring his heart out, it was hard to say which major organ was responsible for your next words.

The creak of the door being pushed open sent Jungkook's eyes wide, revealing your hesitant form. You had your arms crossed over your chest as if to guard the contents inside of it.

You looked like an angel underneath the bathroom's blue fluorescent lights, beautiful and lovely, a stark contrast from your next crushing sentence.

“I slept with Erik.”

Hehe. Ofc my girl Y/N had to have a rebound!!! She knows that life goes on. However, as I wrote in, she definitely regretted it. It was kind of the same situation that Jungkook was in where he pursued something just because it was familiar and a distraction and not because he really wanted it. Both Y/N and Jungkook are flawed characters but that’s okay! If anything, Y/N’s mistake of sleeping with Erik is what allows her to forgive Jungkook. Knowing first hand how complicated their entire relationship really was.

“I don’t need you… but I don’t think I want a life without you.” You finished shyly.

Your eyes were locked with his when suddenly a small noise escaped him, eyes pulling away from yours as his head moved to attempt to hide the way his eyes had grown wet.

I got this line from one of my best friends after her ex broke up with her. It made me physically sad and really sympathize with her so I quickly wrote it down into my notes app to save for later LMAOOOO. Knowing that you are your own person and life will inevitably go on after losing someone, but that your heart still wants and is pleading for the one person you can’t have. SO SAD. I’m happy I got to use this line in one of my fics.

The note Jungkook wrote Y/N,,, imagine him not being able to sleep one night over winter break so he just writes down everything he should have told Y/N while he still had the chance…. I’ll for real cry dude, he’s so cute. Also, the line about him buying you fluffy Halloween socks for Christmas went over people’s heads I think but HECK I THOUGHT THAT WAS SO FUNNY AND SWEET (because Y/N bought Christmas socks when it was Halloween teehee).

"Are you two dorks done crying?" Yara’s voice rang out suddenly, causing both of you to jump apart.

"Yara, you creep! Privacy, dude! Ever try knocking?" You sniffed, wiping at your face hurriedly.

"What? Like you were peeing with Jungkook in the bathroom? Please." She waved you off, walking back into the living room to give you two some privacy. She did say Jungkook had 15 minutes before she’d have to come back in after all. "Anyway, Tae will be over in 10 minutes for the Saved By The Bell marathon that’s on so you guys are more than welcomed to join." She called out from her newly seated position on the couch.

I included this scene with Yara because things were getting too serious for my liking ngl. Plus the idea that the four of them would all come together at the end for a much needed reunion made my happy bitchin heart soar.

Jungkook let out a laugh, his palm finding your cheek, eyes locked on your lips. You were preening for his kiss, mouth parting slightly as you anticipated it.

“Partners?”

The question took you by surprise, eyes widening at your not so pretend lover.

Idiot.

“Partners.” You smiled softly, eyes shiny and brimming with tears as he kissed you for what must have been the millionth time, but still somehow felt like the first.

UGH I LOVE THEM I REALLY DO. I was so happy with how this final scene came out :( They’re partners, they really are I miss these boneheads.

AND NOW, I PRESENT THE CANON FUTURE OF THE BITCHIN UNIVERSE...

10 YEARS LATER

Let’s be honest, Jungkook popped the question the day of graduation, he can’t imagine a life in which you wouldn’t be beside him

You said yes (shocker)

Cue Jungkook being the most wonderful partner and respecting your wish to finish your residency program before having the wedding

You absolutely kick ass at being a neonatal surgeon

Also, Jungkook started a film company! It’s small but he loves what he does and works with colleges and helps out the film majors with resources and equipment <3

SO IT'S THE DAY OF YOUR WEDDING RIGHT

Yara and your sisters are helping you get ready, with your best friend as the ever so reassuring maid of honor

And by that I mean you’re as calm as a cucumber and Yara is one wrong move away from having a stroke

“Y/N… Don’t freak out....The catering company put in two orders of shrimp instead of chicken and steak.”

“Yara, it’s okay.”

“NO ITS NOT???? THIS IS YOUR WEDDING DAY AND YOU’RE GETTING CRUSTACEANS.”

Y/N making Yara take a seat and practice some breathing exercises so she doesn’t upset the baby

Oh yeah, Yara is 10 weeks pregnant

Taehyung is the dad lol

Yara and Taehyung have been together ever since that day at the library hehe <3

They moved in together and adopted a cat and everything (sweet boy Tae wanted a dog but Yara’s afraid of dogs and Tae would do anything for that woman so Yeontan the cat it is)

Yara refuses to put a label on their relationship even after all this time, and Tae doesn’t ask for one. They’re happy and dedicated to each other and don’t feel the need to put pressure on something that’s already so perfect

Yara is actually violently in love with Tae but still scoffs when Y/N tries to bring it up

“Oh my god, you’re so in love with him”

“Huh??? you must be sick or something. Get well soon, damn :/”

Yara likes to come up with different labels for Taehyung every time she has to introduce him. Among her favorites are roommate, rent sharer, baby daddy and penis lender

Speaking of Taehyung, he’d have a hand on Jungkook’s shoulder as he tries to calm down the panicking groom to be

“JK, breathe.”

“What if she doesn’t show up? What if she doesn’t want to marry me? What if I pressured her into this and— and I’ve freaked her out and now she hates me?”

“Dude, you guys have been engaged for eight years. She’s had her opportunity to run. She’ll show up.”

Taehyung scruffing up the younger man’s hair reassuringly, which only flusters him more because DAMMIT he wants to look perfect for you and now his hair is messed up >:(

(You like him no matter what his hair looks like though)

Jungkook literally swallowing down a sob as you walk down the aisle and he lays his eyes on you for the first time

You having a dumb smile on your face the entire walk over because your husband to be is crying and you haven’t even exchanged vows yet

The entire audience going all sobby when you finally do exchange vows because they’re so beautiful and real

The ten years together has not been easy— from financial struggles as you tried to support yourself through med school, to personal conflicts when Jungkook wanted to start a family already

But you guys figured it out

You always do

He’s your person. And you are his.

Y/N’s sisters Rosa and Lia are a WRECK— even your dad is tearing up

Your family loves Jungkook and have been counting down the days until you guys married, let’s be honest

“You may now kiss the bride.”

Jungkook punching the air with a “FINALLY!” before kissing the hell out of you

The cutting of the cake inevitably turning into a food fight

The shrimp entrees turning out to be pretty damn good

Yara catching the bouquet and wagging her brows at Taehyung suggestively

Jungkook pulling you aside to take photos of you outside the venue because you look so so pretty and he loves the way you smile when he’s the one behind the camera

The party is in full session, your siblings tearing up the dance floor like the extroverts they are

You and Jungkook are sat at the head of the room, hands intertwined underneath the table as you watch a tired and painfully sober Yara swing her bare feet onto Taehyung’s lap, requesting a foot rub

Watching your pregnant best friend and her lover together, you turned towards your own, smile impossibly wide

“What?”

“Let’s have a baby.” You’d grin, so stupid happy

Jungkook’s eyes going round and immediately jumping up from his seat because god that’s all he’s ever wanted

Being tugged out the room by a giddy Jungkook, one of your heels flinging off somewhere behind you.

“What’s happening? Where are we going?!”

The two of you find yourself in a storage room somewhere on the hotel floor

“Jeon Jungkook, what the hell—“

His mouth find yourself, kissing you in a way that couldn’t at the altar

You kissed him back without questions, arms wrapping around the man you now called your husband

“I love you.” He’d sigh into your neck, his hot breath causing you to shiver

“I love you too.”

“Let’s make a baby.”

“Yeah let’s— wait, right here? Right now?!”

Jungkook merely nodding as his mouth found the exposed skin of your chest

“Meathead, we can’t just ditch our wedding to have sex!”

“Why not? We did our marital duties. Now it’s our guests' job to get embarrassingly drunk and make a fool of themselves on the dance floor. No one will even miss us.”

“Isn’t baby making what our honeymoon is for?”

“Screw that. I’ve done my waiting. Let’s start our family, nerd.”

Jungkook kissing your protests silent before you inevitably give in and let him take you right there and then, your wedding dress hung around your hips

Husband and wife coming together with shaky breaths and hushed moans as they promise the rest of their lives to each other, making every argument, struggle or moment of uncertainty leading up to now totally worth it

Walk of shame back into the party with nervous hair fixing from you and a proud grin from Jungkook

Yara figuring out exactly why you two had sneaked off to, flashing the newly weds a knowing smirk

The night of your wedding, Jungkook surprises you with a present

You unwrap it in confusion, only to see that it’s a glass frame and inside of it is the wrinkled and worn out lined paper the two of you had scribbled on many many years ago

Jungkook hangs up the contract right above your bed as per your request, smiling as he does and jumping on him the moment he puts down the hammer bc dammit it you’re too heckin excited to make love with your sentimental loser of a husband

And yes, by the next month, you are pregnant and incredibly happy

And of course, your daughter and Yara’s son grow up to be best friends, not a family holiday passing by where they aren’t told the story of the totally bitchin’ way both set of their parents got together

#beyond the story #bts smut #Jungkook smut #bts jungkook #bts #bts imagines #bts preferences #Jungkook x reader #jeon jungkook

1K notes · View notes

raysofcrosby · 2 years

Note

Does this mean no more Subway boy updates? Or any of your fics? 🥺

lolol she’s not really on tumblr a lot, but her and her best friend scroll through the fics on tumblr to read lol. i just told her to block the tag “subway boy” (which she’s now going to call him btw) and to take this blog to the grave with her 😭

#anon #answered

2 notes · View notes

myonmukyuu · 4 years

Text

hot milk tea, thoughts and feelings

I’ve only mentioned it briefly, but I’ve said that I’ll be taking a break from my SetsuAyu series - mainly because of my uni workload though.

But for now, I have a lot of thoughts about the entire thing as a project as well as myself as an artist. So I figured that I’d write a reflection of sorts (warning: it gets kind of personal).

Can you believe it’s been 3-4 months since the series started? I can’t, and I’ve been the one drawing all of these!! If you’ve been reading my work, I’ll say it over and over but I really appreciate it!!! Like I’m dead serious!!! Completely!! Utterly!! Without a doubt!!! I love all of you!!!

When I posted that first comic, I didn’t think it’d get the positive reception that it did get. Like, I’ve been producing basically entirely Muse content for years and suddenly decided to tap into Nijigaku? You could argue that it didn’t get that much attention, but either way, the attention it did get surprised me. I was so happy that people were engaged (and it still makes me stupidly happy, like on a level where I’m almost embarrassed to admit HAHA)

Recently I’ve just uploaded the bonus for the 3rd update which wraps up that part, and it really just clicked - that I really have invested soooo much time into this series. 36 pages now! And we’re only 3/10 main updates in!! I have so much passion for this - like a fire that can’t be put out. Every single update has something that I want to communicate/show so I always feel fired up. Heck, if you’ve spoken to me during the process you’d catch me always saying “I’m excited for the next one!!!” while working on it LMAO. It’s been my longest string of non-stop work. Usually I feel burned out more quickly but I was always so excited that I couldn’t stop! You’d find that I’m usually in a state of conflict bc I alwaaaays want to talk about it but at the same time I don’t want to spoil anything. (THE NEXT UPDATE JUICY)

I think it’s a clear reminder of why I draw actually. The answer between each artist always differs, but I think it’s something important to be aware of. And well, for me? I’ve realised I’m a passion-monster. Passion keeps my blood pumping 100%. As a result... you could say I might be a more selfish kind of artist. Maybe it’s burn-out from running all those ask-blogs/RP when I was like 13-16, but I’ve realised that I’m having the most fun drawing what I genuinely love. It’s kind of why you’d rarely see me do requests and why I no longer do commissions. That isn’t to say that I hate drawing for other people. It can be fulfilling! But it’s more like - I barely have the time to draw for myself, so drawing for others is kind of a lower priority in general. It’s also why I’ve decided against studying graphic design when I graduated highschool. It’s just not happening as a career.

When I ask myself, “what kind of artist do I want to be?” I always think “Somebody who marches to her own beat and works hard to make content that she loves.” It’s also why I never delete anything - even my oldest art that makes me cringe. Because the me from 5 years ago put her love into that too. It’s really cheesy sounding but that’s how I see it LMFAO. I couldn’t do that to her. And also, just because I don’t like something anymore, it doesn’t mean that no one else does. So I’ll continue to never delete my old work. As a bonus, we get to see how far I’ve come too~.

I feel a little vulnerable admitting something like this and I’m pretty sure I’ve only told like 4 humans, but I think my #1 goal as an artist is that I want people to be able to look at my work (that I actually put my heart into) and think “this person loves this” or “this person works hard”. If you can do that, and sincerely feel the feelings I put into my comic, then I’ve already reached my goal. Can people tell how much I love these characters? The series? The concept? Can people tell how much work I’ve been putting into these updates? Can people tell when I’m having fun? It’s something I think about a lot. The idea of that people might think so makes me tear up HAHA - I get really sappy thinking about these kinds of things. And well, if people can’t tell then I’m not working hard enough!

That isn’t to say that I’m always putting my life-blood into everything I make. I’m mainly referring to the stuff where I do. I think it’s pretty clear when I’m pumping a lot of love into something. In general though, there’s always an intention for me to like communicate some idea or feeling and doing something like that requires maybe a bit of love~.

I feel like that as a character, Setsuna really resonates with me a lot. In personality? Not at all LMFAOOOO (she’s such a nice girl!!). More because of her ideals and principles. After typing like everything that I did up until this point, I bet you can guess why. I’ll keep it short and simple though, since this post is getting stupidly long.

Basically, I really resonate with her drive and passion as both an artist, and just in general actually? I’m a believer in that if you’re passionate about something, you can spread that passion. That’s the mentality I have with my art. If my love shows, then maybe other people will understand why I’ve come to love something. And maybe they’ll come to love it too. If I’m having fun, maybe they will have fun too! Very cheesy, I know, but that’s just how I roll!!!

Like rare pair? New fandom? Still applies. It might take awhile, but eventually either the people who love that thing will find me, or I’ll help people come to love something new (or at least see where it’s coming from lolol)!

And as Setsu says:

You tell ‘em girl !!! That devotion is my driving force!!

Of course I know this is idealistic, but I think that’s fine. It’s no bother to me if someone feels indifferent/ negative towards my work because that’s just natural.

I think it’s a form of communication and that’s what drives my art. I’ve been intending on writing a guide/ or talking about my art process for comics for some time now and I think that’d be the first thing I’d mention? I’m always trying to communicate some sort of feeling/tone/idea and that comes from a place of love y’know.

I feel like I’m saying “love” and “passion” a lot - you can really tell I’m vibing with Setsuna huh LMAO. There are other reasons I vibe with her too, but I won’t touch on that.

Coming back to my SetsuAyu series. You can tell why I’m so happy about it right? The story, the pairing dynamic, I feel like that people are understanding what I’m trying to communicate - that people are receiving my feelings of love for it and that makes me smile so widely. I really put a lot into it!!

This series is the first large project I’ve ever taken you see and I’m so so happy that I’ve been able to get this far! It really means a lot to me. But it wasn’t actually the first comic series I’ve tried to do. I actually had a Muse long-running comic planned years ago - a Dancing Stars on Me! AU but it never came to life. I think it was my lack of confidence that held me back. It might be weird of me to pat myself on the back, but I’m proud that I managed to get going this time!! I’ve actually written the SetsuAyu series in a way that for the first half, I could drop the series if I really wanted to at any point (each part is pretty independent, and that description I always copy-and-paste is all the explanation you really need), but now I know for sure that I don’t want to drop it! I wanna keep going!! Even if it gets tough. Although it might be a little early for me to make such bold declarations, I’m only 3/10 through LOOOL. But that’s just the way I feel right now!

I know it’s irrational and it’s something I’d rather not admit, but an anxiety that’s always looming over me is the idea that I’m not working hard enough - or that people think I’m not? Each comic update...takes like a month right? And a month is a long time. There’s this part of me that is convinced that people think I’m lazy for working so slowly. And I know it’s not true!! It doesn’t make sense for it to be!!! But like I said it’s irrational.

I’m really proud of this comic y’know. It’s a really big commitment and I’m proud of myself for being able to commit. I work full time 9-5, and I also am in my final year at university. I’m... kind of busy lol. So the huge factor in that month-long update turnaround is just that I don’t have the time to always be drawing. But I try to draw as much as I can! If you have me on discord you might notice me work on it for like 2-5 hours, almost daily before I go to bed (1am). Of course I’m not only drawing, but after I get everything plotted out sometimes that’s all I do. This comic is super time-consuming LMAO - and I try my best to work on it a little at a time.

So yeah, the entire month of comic-production is me drawing every almost every night.

Yeah it, - it’s kind of exhausting. Even though I’m itching to work on my next update, I’ve decided to take a break for uni crunch which is why I say the next one might be two months. It’s really odd though. The other night I was in bed feeling restless. It was so weird not drawing till 1am that I felt like I needed to be doing something. This comic series might have weird effects on my habits...

It makes me anxious thinking that it’d be so long till next update. But I’ll do my best to push that aside ! Hopefully I can get uni done and dusted ASAP! I want them to date dammit...

I've decided that I want to see this series through to the end. It’ll probably be May next year when that happens though LMAO! Please bear with my slow turnaround time. It’s only been 3 updates, but I can already see that I’m improving with each one. With each update I feel like I really learn from the previous and I always feel this sense of excitement with trying out new techniques and trying to create different feelings. I really want to see how the last updates will look compared to the first! Technically we’re 3/10 (10 is an epilogue), but after 6 I actually stop doing bonuses? So teeechnically I’m like 40% of the way through~.

It might be a little over-ambitious, but I kind of want to print it out and make a hard-copy when I’m done. I’m not sure about what the demand would be if I were to sell it, but I definitely want to print it for myself first and foremost (after touching up the earlier updates of course LOL). It’d be like a physical representation of my achievement. I hope I can make it there.

Anyways, I’ve rambled for far too long. I’m not sure why I suddenly felt like talking about uh, everything but yeaaaah. If you’ve read this far, kudos to you! You now have a window into my soul that I’m still not sure if I’m comfortable with revealing (but I’m comfortable enough because I’m posting this so...)!

After reading all of this, can you tell why I always get so so happy after each update? It’s the fruition of what’s usually 2-3 weeks of non-stop hard work! Seeing people connect with it always sends me to another realm of bliss and I always feel soft like putty LOL.

#myon speaks #HOLY MOLY #ITS 2K WORDS #no pressure for anyone to read all of this #its just me rambling into the air~#if you've been keeping up with my series: i just want to say thank you #this series is really important to me (i explain why in the post im not aboutta start rambling again)

21 notes · View notes

platonicavengers · 4 years

Text

(updated) about me!

my name is cait!!

im 18 years old

my pronouns are she/her

im bi

i’ve only had this blog since around march ish of 2020, i think i made it out of boredom at rhe beginning of quarantine lolol

some of my other fandoms include glee, harry potter, reality tv, descendants, mcyt, and danganronpa

i’m from the us

my twitter is iicconics_

my editing instagram is iicconics

my wattpad is iicconics

my ao3 is ALSO iicconics lol

uhh that might be it! idk lol i might come back and add stuff to this but this is all i got for now :)

love u guys

mwah

bye

2 notes · View notes

biaseveryonenoregrets · 5 years

Text

Things my GC has said as Varying Idols Because This Chat Has Been Alive Around a Year Now

“i wanna stab a bitch with a stiletto” - @hoehyunjin as Mark from Got7 who has thrown a laptop apparently

“my keyboard wants to make me a belieber?????” - @buwubuwuthefuwul as Lucas from NCT-WayV who is also known as Lucas Beiber

“YALL REMEMBER WHEN I LEFT THE GC BY MISTAKE” - @bndnsclf8 as Chanyeol from EXO who just seems like a person who makes these mistakes

“i’m in love with like 1048382749 people but yea!” - @magicaldreamfox1 as Jackson from Got7 who is a person who loves people

“I have a river...The body will swell and any fingerprints left will erode away” - @tearacha-spearc as D.O from EXO because we love a whole satansoo

“I’m good. How was the dungeon today?” - @brini144 as literally anyone @ any YG artist

“my moms gon kill me but YEEET” - @aiurjins as Felix from Stray Kids who has not gone a single day without yeeting yet

“Im having a convo about bubble tea” - @miatsubaki23 as Sehun from EXO who of course founded the craze that is bubble tea

“Damn girl!!! Maaaajor tea” - @chatoyanthoney who is officially a hype woman of out GC, you the real mvp! ;) and of course will be our resident meme boy with coffee Hyungwon of Monsta X

“Korean people started photoshopping their cats onto the Captain Marvel poster lolol” - @s7g as Minho from Stray Kids who I’m sure participated in this fad

“My softness for you all <3″ - @sailorchell our resident *sft girl who will be playing our associated *sft boy Jimin of BTS

“Idk But Recruiters Like Pulled Me Out Of Class It Was Scary I Thought I Was Gonna Die” - @yeehawnana as our scaredy cat Ten of NCT WayV

“I love you guys with whole my heart-I’ll try to be more active!” - @lxx-fxlix who also failed to keep updated like our baby boy Chan of Stray Kids who I need an update selfie from rn

“i have stalked her blog and is all about skz so I think she’s nice! we’ll see” - @bluedreamindublin who is our mom and created our beautiful family of a chat as momma Taeyong of NCT 127

Thank you guys for being in my life and for giving me such a happy year! I love all of you to pieces and hope we can continue to grow even closer and all eventually meet one day as @chatoyanthoney and I got to meet and she is now one of the loves of my life so I hope to one by one or all at once meet everyone at some point in our lives so we can share laughs too! I love all of you bbs and babe to the moon and back!

credit for this sharksung edit goes to @bndnsclf8 who made me this beautiful masterpiece quite some time ago now lol

#kpop #idols #groupchat #i have friends now #to all my bbs whom i love #and my babe you know who you are

24 notes · View notes

cards-onthetable · 5 years

Text

An Elusive Computer Post

Y’all, 99.999% of the time, I exist on my phone and tablet. It’s very rare that I do any Fandom Stuff or social media on my laptop. But tonight, after This Episode, I had to break out the big guns. I need to be able to type as fast as my brain screams words. tl;dr: EVERYTHING IS THE WORST AND I HATE IT. Hey I’ll do a fun little page break so you don’t have to scroll past this whole thing if you don’t want to. How nice of me.

Erin

OPENING SCENE AND ERIN’S ALREADY YELLING AT PEOPLE. COOL.

JUST DON’T with this foster parent (allegedly) killing a foster child thing. Foster parents have enough of a negative perception as it is... a foster parent who “cracked” and killed a child in her care certainly won’t help. And I know this won’t turn into a well-done, thoughtful Discourse on the lack of support and resources for foster parents who are caring for children with complex needs. So I hate it.

I’m so, so, so sad for this child.

Sidenote re: Sam saying “I’ve already got a mom” (explaining why he didn’t call his foster parent “mom”) - okay, BB, one actual sensitive portrayal here, thumbs up.

Welp Erin’s boss is an asshole but so’s everyone else on this show. What else is new?

And now Sam is locked out of his new foster home. Another nice tally in the Negative Portrayal column. This is disgusting. His appreciation for his previous foster parent is obvious (this kid’s a ten times better actor than fucking Will “Dead Face” Estes at this point) and I hate this entire concept. At least the show’s portrayal of the child in foster care himself is positive.

Now Sam’s at Anthony’s house and this is off topic, but for half a second can we appreciate that Sam is also a bajillion times better at apologies than Jamie Reagan? Nice.

If Anthony becomes Sam’s foster parent I will be SO ANNOYED. One, because I’m sure the show won’t even hint at an accurate process - it’ll be insta-parent, Anthony walks into some caseworker’s office and walks out with physical custody of a child (fun fact: it takes three months or longer to get licensed as a foster parent). Two, because it’s kind of another blow to the reputation of foster parents that this episode is painting - like the only suitable foster parent in a whole city of veteran, trained, experienced FPs is this newbie? This does not taste good.

This is a cute scene. Rather than Anthony being Sam’s foster parent, how about he becomes his mentor?

OH. NICE. EXACTLY WHAT I DIDN’T WANT. “I’m going to sign the papers later today. I’m going to foster Sam myself.” Can we please get some follow-up on this, BB? Let’s please see Anthony trying to navigate the waters of parenting a teenager who likely has attachment-related diagnoses and other challenges. Is Anthony going to get trauma-informed care training? Or is he just going to wing it and hope that it’s all magical and swell? Does he have a sensitive, non-snarky bone in his body? I’m on the edge of my seat. (LOL @ Erin being the voice of reason here.)

OH. WHOA WHOA WHOA. “It’s not like I always wanted a son, but one came knocking and I answered the door.” Remember that line above where Sam reminded us that he has a mom? Do you understand why this line made me gag? There’s a fine line you walk as a foster parent, where you’re performing all the duties of parenting this child as if they’re your own - but you have to remember and be sensitive to the fact that they’re not. Kids in foster care are a package deal, yo, they come with a whole other family too. For teenagers this is an especially important Issue.

This entire storyline was terrible. 0/10.

Fat Shaming (Frank and co)

Poor Witten, you guys. That is awful and terrible and dangerous that her partner can’t even make it up 4 flights of stairs. “I’m here and you’re fine” - but what if she wasn’t?

Did Sid Gormley just use the word “fat shaming” and argue that physical fitness does not affect a cop’s ability to do their job?

Cops who are on the beat should be able to pass a fairly high standard for physical fitness. The end, basically.

Family dinner (tossed in here due to the topic of conversation): Seriously? Henry’s going to talk about it being discrimination to require cops to meet a physical fitness standard that is a pretty basic aspect of their ability to do their job? Nice.

Oh, magical, Frank has come up with a Compromise that Makes Everybody Happy. Raise your hand if you’re surprised.

Danny

TBH I hardly noticed this storyline at all. I’m much too busy angrily scribbling all of the examples of Dismissive Jamie on my whiteboard. Oh well, win some lose some.

Jamko

The way Jamie brushes Eddie off during this whole New Partner Discussion is gross. Refer to yesterday’s Two Pronged Complaint for the details.

The Biggest Issues: Jamie minimizing Eddie’s experience on the job, and being too protective of her/failing to be an objective boss. Et cetera.

“wHaT eLsE dOn’T I kNoW?” suck a dick, Jamie Reagan.

Peep those obviously empty coffee cups that probably have a piece of dry ice at the bottom to make the “steam.” A+.

I’m going to keep track of how many times “female empowerment” is said in this episode. I’ll keep you updated.

So this “fraternal organization” that we’ve all been so stressed about Eddie joining is...basically a women’s intramural sports league? LOLOL so I’m super excited to watch Jamie sputter about how Joe died playing softball* and therefore Eddie shouldn’t join.

LOOK AT EDDIE. She is legitimately excited about the idea of playing softball, dude. That smile is as much personality as we’ve gotten out of her all season. CAN’T WAIT TO WATCH JAMIE “WET BLANKET” REAGAN SNUFF THAT RIGHT OUT.

This ~date night~ situation is hilarious in a Young Childless Couple way.

OH, so NOW Jamie’s interested in a legitimate conversation with Eddie, engaged and responding... with questions in a demanding, rude tone? I’m so annoyed at his whole handling of the Eddie’s-new-partner thing.

GOD why is everything a Female Empowerment Thing? Can’t women just... enjoy playing sports?

OH HERE’S WHERE IT GETS FUN HOLD ONTO YOUR BUTTS

BAD IDEA

YOU’RE ABOUT TO BECOME A REAGAN

THAT’S A NO-GO

NOW YOU’RE JUST BEING STUBBORN

“No, I’m being astonished that my fiancé is trying to tell me what I can and cannot do” SAME, EDDIE

I’m so angry that the scene cuts off there. Did they just go about their stupid dinner date with this Tension floating palpably in the air between them? Did Eddie pull out an “I think I’ll sleep at my place tonight” and stalk away in that red? satin? dress? ? I hope she poured his stupid ON TAP IPA (objectively the worst type of beer, btw) down his shirt and walked out.

I AM SO SAD watching this scene of Eddie backing out of softball.

“I’m not much of a joiner” is a DUMB RIDICULOUS LINE and Eddie says it TWICE, folks.

Witten doesn’t bring up Jamie at all - I therefore assume she doesn’t know Eddie’s a Future Reagan (which is a whole other issue, but anyway.) . Witten thinks Eddie’s backing out so as to avoid associating with Witten. So I assume Witten’s intentions with the softball invite were totally pure. IMAGINE THAT! A woman who wants to be friends with another woman, one who she works with and respects and wants to get to know better! With no ulterior motive! Someone please hit Jamie Reagan in the nostril with a dart.

I like Witten more and more. Can we replace all the Reagan storylines with Witten, Sam, and Old Eddie in dark jeans and a studded jacket?

A LAUNDROMAT? ONE: Shouldn’t Jamie, as A Reagan, have laundry in his building?* TWO: It he didn’t, why wouldn’t they do laundry for free at Frank’s house every week?*

I CAN SMELL THE TENSION and I am legitimately curious how they’ve coexisted between the date and now. How’s that working out, hmm - that “keeping work and home separate” thing?

“I DIDN’T TELL YOU TO, I ASKED” says Jamie. Shall we go back a few bullet points to when he told her it’s a “no-go”?

I NEED TO KNOW WHAT ELSE I NEED TO KNOW - Same, Eddie. Do I really need to reiterate how ridiculous this whole thing is - that they’re engaged without dating, and now finding out that maybe there’s a reason people date first, even if they’re best friends, because this is the kind of stuff you work out before you start shopping for your dress.

“Are we talking, or are we just talking smack?” SOME ACCUSATION from the dumbass who said ALL THE THINGS IN THOSE BULLETS UP ABOVE.

Finally, for once, Eddie is voicing some real and legitimate concerns. Are we going to get any sort of resolution or mature adult discussion of these things? NOPE!

Did he seriously just tell her to cut it out? I hate him so much. I hope somebody duct tapes him to the front of those washer/dryers and pulls out each individual eyebrow hair with tweezers.

This laundromat scene just exemplifies so many of the issues I’ve been rage blogging about all damn season. Jamie ultimately brushing off Eddie’s concerns without ever giving her real answers. Not having the respect for her to even take her thoughts into account. Barking orders like he knows it all, and Eddie isn’t capable of making her own decisions. At least this time that’s the actual point of the scene rather than the nasty subtext.

EDDIE AND DANNY SCENE: I’m actually surprised that this is the first time Joe has been mentioned. Watching the sneak peek I figured Jamie’s main argument against Eddie joining an organization would be that it’s what got his brother killed (being vague, obviously, since Eddie clearly didn’t know the details). Not that it’s improper As A Reagan. I hoped the context of the episode would make me feel a little better about this scene but it just feels even more out of place and poorly/choppily written. I like Eddie and Danny together - I’d like them to interact more. But this didn’t do it for me. Gotta meet that Joe Mention Quota* on the season, I guess.

FINAL SCENE: in summary, FUCK THIS.

Sidenote: When is someone going to get suspicious @ how often Eddie gets pulled into Sarge’s office?

For the record, I anticipated an eye-rolly “Ohhkay, maybe I overreacted...” speech.

WHAT WE GOT FELL BELOW EVEN THAT VERY LOW BAR.

Jamie explains himself. Fine, he has a right to do that, and it’s constructive in helping Eddie understand the man she’s about to marry (god don’t even remind me). BUT HE DOES NOT ADMIT ANY WRONGDOING.

THERE IS NO APOLOGY

THERE IS NO ADMISSION THAT HE MADE MISTAKES in how he spoke to her, ordered her around, and didn’t even stop for eight seconds to listen to what she had to say

THERE IS NOT EVEN THE VERY MINIMAL “I overreacted” type of acknowledgment.

“So maybe if I forget sometimes, you can remind me” THIS IS GROSS TOO because it essentially puts the burden on Eddie to teach/remind Jamie how to HAVE AN ADULT CONVERSATION AND NOT BE AN ASS. He could AT LEAST take responsibility for his own improvement in the Future.

Eddie said literally two words in this entire scene. There was no mutual understanding, no real agreement, no genuine Development in their relationship.

THIS IS NOT A SATISFACTORY RESOLUTION TO THIS CONFLICT.

This episode is called Rectify but NOTHING HAS BEEN RECTIFIED.

ALSO, this seems like an awfully Personal conversation to be having in uniform, Sarge. Are they even trying anymore?

HE JUST THREW A SOFTBALL GLOVE AT HER. Is that supposed to be... sweet? Touching? An admission of guilt/mistake/wrongdoing? TRY AGAIN, BB. NONE OF THE ABOVE.

WELL. If you’ve made it this far, I hope you’re as disgruntled as I am. Seems like plenty of y’all were quite unhappy with this episode as well. I’m enjoying your tweets and sadness. I’ve been the queen of this club for almost a year now. Welcome, make yourselves comfortable, there’s plenty of ice cream in the freezer. Just don’t sit on the far end of the couch. That’s my dog’s favorite spot.

*These four hilarious lines were taken from two important Outside Sources. Thanks for your contribution, Outside Sources.

#sandy hates it all #blue bloods #9 x 18 Rectify

20 notes · View notes

hoodiehan · 6 years

Text

Just Friends Pt.2 - Hwang Hyunjin Imagine

Synopsis: You have to read Part 1 in order to understand this lolol. Part 1 is here! (On Kris's blog aka @hey-hey-chan :D)

Genre: Fluff, angst

Word Count: 3.4k

A/N: O o o o o I collaborated with @hey-hey-chan on this project for @straycuties' birthday!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY ASTRELLA I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I HOPE YOU HAVE A WONDERFUL DAY TODAY. GO GET DRUNK AND GO TO A STRIP CLUB YEET YEET YEET

Slamming the door shut behind me, I threw myself onto the bed and let out a scream of frustration into my pillows and bed sheets.

The nerve of that boy, Hwang Hyunjin. The only person who I thought that I could count on in this world had left me dry and hanging on a day that he knew was important for me. He left me for what? Some girl? Mind him, a girl who already has a boyfriend and clearly has no intention of dating him. Hyunjin can go find someone else to comfort him when he's in tears when he finally comes to his senses that she won’t date him. I'm obviously not important to him compared to other things; or should I say other girls.

It was a restless night as I kept tossing and turning in my bed. I was happy that I could finally feel myself being free of Hyunjin and all his dramatics, but at the same time, I had also cried so many times during the night. I didn't want to be done with Hyunjin, but at the same time, it's obvious where his priorities lay. And I was most definitely not one of them.

Waking up the next morning, I took one look in the mirror and let out a dejected sigh. The eye bags under my eyes had gotten darker and bigger because I had stayed up all night, my hair was a mess, and my face was puffy due to my multiple crying sessions.

Scratching the back of my neck, I walked towards the bathroom and attempted to make myself look presentable for the day. Now that I declared Hyunjin to be out of my life, I wouldn't need to get all dressed up for someone. As I got ready, I checked my phone for any notifications.

"Hey, what was that??" A text from Hyunjin from last night.

"Are you okay?" Another text from him.

"It's 1 AM and I know that you're awake because you never sleep. Why aren't you responding?"

"Are you ignoring me?"

"Alright it's now 2 AM and I can see your bedroom light is on. What's up?"

"I just got a notification. Are you rabbitting without me?"

The rest of my notifications consisted of updates from Instagram or Snapchat, or they were full of Hyunjin spamming my phone. It's not like I meant to ignore him last night, but that's exactly what I had intended to do. In the midst of one of my many crying sessions, I got fed up with his spamming and turned off my phone so that I could cry in peace.

I hated feeling like this. Sad, then mad, then relieved, then sad all over again. It was a never ending cycle of emotions, and I just wanted it all to go away. I just wanted Hyunjin to go away and to leave my thoughts forever. Unfortunately, I couldn't even do that, though when the boy who I wanted to never remember again lived right next door to me, and the fact that I had to see him every day.

"Y/N!" Hyunjin called from his house the second that I had stepped foot onto my front porch. Groaning, I turned around and slowly faced him.

"What?" I snapped unhappily.

"Whoa," Hyunjin said holding up two hands to put a distance between us. "What's with the tone?"

"There's no tone," I said coldly. The irony to the sentence, though. "Do you need something?"

Hyunjin tilted his head, confused and looked at me. "Did I do something wrong?"

I almost snorted at the way that he seemed so confused. It was ironic how he didn't know, when everything he had done was wrong in all ways possible. "I don't know, Hyunjin. I'm just not feeling it today. Maybe I'll just talk to you later, yeah?" I said letting out a long sigh. I was in no mood to fight, but I wasn’t in the mood to play nice either. It was better if I just walked away now.

"Um, yeah, okay. That's fine. I'll text you later then?" Hyunjin asked, but I had already turned around and walked in the other direction.

"Yeah sure," I mumbled, but he was already too far away to hear.

----

I was sitting in a booth of a cafe sipping on a strawberry smoothie. Every few seconds, I let out a small sigh as I stared out the window of the little shop. I would always come here with Hyunjin and it felt wrong to be here by myself.

I was nearing the end of my milkshake, when I heard someone come up to the table. Thinking that it was Hyunjin, I quickly looked over only to see that it was the waiter.

"Hey, can I get you a refill or something?" The boy asked shyly, wringing his hands in front of his body. He had a bashful smile on his face; one that made his dimples show, and one that would surely melt any girl's heart.

"Oh, uh, no that's alright," I peered down at his name tag. "Chan," I said finishing my sentence. "I'm almost done anyways.”

Chan nodded in response before looking back up at me and smiling once more. "You're usually here with that boy. What happened today? Decided to take a break from one another?" Chan joked, trying to lighten the mood.

"Yes, we actually did decide to give each other some air," I shrugged my shoulders, looking at my drink and swirling the straw around my cup.

"I'm so sorry, do you want to talk about it?" Chan asked sliding into the booth seat across from mine. Narrowing my eyes at his boldness, I quirked my head at him.

"Don't you have tables to wait or plates to clean?"

"Look around," Chan held a hand out to the cafe to prove his point. "There's no one else here. Just you and I. Now, tell me what happened."

The rest of the afternoon was spent with me rambling on and on about my problem regarding Hyunjin (although I left out the part about how I felt about him) and Chan listening intently. He never once interrupted me, or said anything. He simply listened, nodded, and added in his own opinions and advice in between pauses. It was nice to finally let out all that I had been holding in.

By the time that I was done talking with Chan, the sun was beginning to set, and closing time for the cafe was fast approaching.

"Hey, you want to get out of here?" Chan asked.

"Yeah, that would actually be really nice," I nodded. One of the sides of Chan's mouth quirked upwards in a lopsided smile that almost made me want to melt again.

"Where do you want to go?" Chan asked once he had finished up locking the cafe. Pondering for a bit, I stood still before turning back to face him.

"Have you ever gotten a tattoo before?" When the words left my lips, I almost felt too stunned to even comprehend it. A tattoo? Why would I say that?

Chan furrowed his eyebrows, surprised at my question. "No... But I guess that I've always wanted to get one."

I smiled cheekily at the boy and shrugged. “So, like, how would you feel about getting one?”

The boy raised a brow and stuck his hands in his pockets. “Are you sure?”

I nodded, feeling the adrenaline rush get to me. I had never spent this much time away from Hyunjin and I was feeling the independence surge to me, making me bolder than I was before.

“Positive.”

---

The next few days consisted of minimal conversations and texts between Hyunjin and I. We didn't talk much anymore, which I suppose was fine for the most part. It felt alright to distance myself away from Hyunjin a little bit. But word got around that I had gone out with Chan to get a tattoo, and it was clear in Hyunjin's texts that he wasn't happy with any of it.

I guess it wasn’t a good move to ask Hyunjin’s cousin to do my tattoo.

"You got a tattoo?! Without me?!?!?" Was the first text that I had gotten from Hyunjin in the morning.

"Who is this Chan guy??? Why am I hearing that you went out with him??" The second text that I received from him.

"Why aren't you replying? Why are you just reading my texts?" One of the texts that I skimmed over in his spamming.

"That's it, I'm coming over."

That text was not one that I had seen, as I had been too busy ignoring Hyunjin.

"Can you please stop seeing him?" Were the first words that came out of Hyunjin's mouth when I opened my front door only to see him standing in place of it.

"Seeing who?" I asked innocently, pretending not to know what Hyunjin was going on about.

"You know who! Chan! Stop seeing him!" Hyunjin said raising his voice to be near a shout.

"What's so bad about Chan?" I asked, placing my hands on my hips in a defensive position. I was deeply confused as to why he was so mad at me all of a sudden, it’s not like he liked me.

"Everything is bad about Chan! He's not right for you."

"Oh, that's rich coming from you," I snapped back at Hyunjin. I felt my heart drop at his rude comments about Chan. Even though I wasn’t romantically involved with Chan, he was the only one there for me to spill my feelings to. He had been the one who picked me up from a hard time and I wished Hyunjin would respect that.

"You know I'm right. Chan isn't good for you. He goes around playing with girls, and you're just one of them too!"

I glared at Hyunjin, and began to fume. "How dare you say such a thing to me? You don't even know, Chan! And do you not hear the words that are coming from your mouth? Do you not understand that, that is the same thing that I told you not too long ago about her?"

"Hey, she's a great girl!" Hyunjin exclaimed narrowing his eyes.

"Yeah, I beg to differ."

"What's so bad about her?"

"Everything. Everything about her is wrong. She plays with your heart even though she has a boyfriend!"

"But why are you so mad about me liking-"

"Ah," I said holding a finger up. "Do not speak that devil's name. You'll only worsen the situation."

"Okay, so then why are you so mad about me liking her?"

"Because I like you, you idiot!" The words bursted out of my mouth before I could process them. But by the time I had realized what I had said, the damage was already done.

"You...you what?" Hyunjin quietly asked, his mouth gaping.

Sighing, I looked past Hyunjin, not daring to look him in the eyes as I began to let out the confession that I had been holding in for such a long time. “All these years, I've comforted you when you were hurt. I stood back and watched you chase after someone, and I supported you in doing so. I did everything to help you because I am your best friend. But do you know how much that hurts? To watch someone you love, fall in love with someone else? Someone who doesn't even deserve your love? It freaking sucks, Hyunjin."

Hyunjin stood back in silence. All this time, he had been moping around and pining for someone else, when in reality, here you were pining for him.

"Y/N, I'm so sorry. I just-"

"Don't," I said cutting him off. "Just leave me alone." Slamming the door in Hyunjin's face, I turned around and leaned my back against the door. Pressing a hand against my face, I finally let out all of the sobs and emotions that I had been holding in.

----

It had been almost two weeks since I had last spoken to Hyunjin. Ever since our fight, it was if the both of us went out of our ways to avoid each other in any way possible. I would make sure that Hyunjin wasn't leaving his house the same time that I was. But it sometimes occurred that we would run into each other without thinking. When that happened, then Hyunjin would rush away in the opposite direction. It hurt to see him avoiding me like that, but it was better than seeing him and having to speak with him about whatever happened. Yet, every time I clicked on my phone, I expected to find a text or some sort of notification from Hyunjin. But as always, there was nothing. Just my lock screen that displayed the date and time.

Sighing, I turned off my phone and entered the record store shop that I usually went to when I was feeling down. And in the past few days, I had especially been feeling sad and heartbroken.

I was browsing through the newest selection of records that the store had just received, when I noticed something out of the corner of my eye. Or should I say someone.

Pretending not to have seen them, I continued to look flick through the record albums when I felt his presence come up from behind me.

“I’m sorry,” Hyunjin said coming up behind me and wrapping his arms around my waist.

“Are you now?”

“Yes, yes I am so very sorry. You’re right. I shouldn’t have been so blind. I just like, she-who shall-not-be-named, a lot, and I was hoping that she would give me a chance, somehow.”

I couldn’t help but smile a little when he said “she-who-shall-not-be-named.” After all this time, Hyunjin wouldn’t say her name around me.

“Yes, well, I am always right,” I said letting out a puff of air as I continued to look through the stacks of record labels. Hyunjin rested his head on top of my shoulder and it took everything in me not to freeze up.

I didn’t like skin ship that much, but something about the way that Hyunjin was just holding onto me felt right. I hated it, but at the same time, I just wanted to hold onto him and never let go. I was supposed to be mad at Hyunjin, but talking with him again just felt...right. The longest that we had ever gone without speaking with one another was just a day, and that was because Hyunjin had gone overnight camping. Maybe it was time to reconcile with him. No, I can’t be that weak.

“Yes, you are most definitely always right,” Hyunjin mumbled nodding his head against my shoulder. “What can I do to make you forgive me? Take you out for some ice cream? Pay for your shopping spree? Make you a lavish meal?” He gave me a sheepish smile, but I wasn’t up for it at the moment.

“Well, first of all, you’re too broke to take me shopping. Second of all, I don’t want you anywhere near a kitchen because you’ll most likely burn it down.” I spat.

I could feel Hyunjin’s laughter vibrate throughout my body, and when he stepped away to look at me with the biggest eye smile ever, I couldn’t help but smile back at him.

“I really am sorry, though, Y/N. I know that I keep saying this, but you’re right. I shouldn’t keep chasing after someone who already has a boyfriend, and already said that they have no interest in me.”

I nodded slowly as I listened Hyunjin’s apology.

“And I am most definitely sorry,” Hyunjin looked down and took my hand in his and holding onto it. “For not realizing that there was a beautiful girl right in front of me who was chasing after me all this time. I should have opened my eyes and seen that it was you all this time. There’s no one else in the world except for you.”

My mouth fell open a little bit as I took in Hyunjin’s confession. I didn’t want to assume anything and get my hopes up, but his next words confirmed all of my thoughts, hopes and dreams.

“I love you, Y/N,” Hyunjin said looking right at me.

At that moment, I felt my whole world stop. I could barely understand what was happening as the words were so foreign to me. All these years, I had pined over him restlessly and watched him get with other girls; I had never imagined the same situation for me. “And before you get angry or upset or in denial, let me explain. I know that I’ve been going out with girls and pining over this girl for a year now, yet I can spend weeks without hanging out with her in person. But that one night that you stopped texting me, I felt my whole world collapsing. And when we were not talking to each other, I felt so alone like I had no one.” I saw a tear drop fall to his cheek and I resisted the urge to wipe it.

“You’re just saying that because you’ve never been without me-”

“Hah, I knew you were going to say that. But it’s true, I’d never spent so much time without you and I realized that I can’t. Whenever I see something funny, I immediately want to send it to you, but I couldn’t. When I felt antsy in my house or saw a cool event online, I couldn’t hang out with you. I know this is going to sound cheesy, but it felt like a part of me was missing and I couldn’t function without you. And trust me y/n, no one has ever made me feel this way. I’ve never fallen apart so badly.”

Suddenly, he grabbed my hands and pulled them tightly to his chest. “This heart it only beats for you now, I promise. It’s yours to break or to use or to trash, I don’t care, but it’s yours and it’s always been yours.” I felt tears rush down my cheeks as his voice cracked on the last words.

I know that I said that I was done with Hyunjin, but in that moment, I didn’t care about anything else. I had spent too many years with this boy to just drop him all of a sudden, and no matter what, I would always love him; he is, and will forever be, my best friend.

Breathing a sigh of relief, I dropped Hyunjin’s hands, stood up on my tippy toes, and wrapped my arms around his neck.

“Dammit, Hyunjin, I love you too,” I breathed in his ear, smiling as I felt him wrap his arms around my waist to lift me off the ground and spin me around. Hyunjin’s own happy giggle was the only thing I heard in my ear as we rejoiced in the aisle of the record shop.

“How did you know that I would be here?” I asked Hyunjin once he had set me down on the floor again.

“This is the record shop. You always come here when you’re angry and need to look for some sad song to listen to,” Hyunjin shrugged scratching the back of his neck.

“I never told you that I come here every time I’m mad though,” I said raising an eyebrow at him.

“Yeah, well, every time you’re angry or mad, you always ask me to take you here,” Hyunjin smiled and rubbed his nose. “But I don’t think that you’re angry or mad anymore, so let’s go!” Hyunjin grabbed my hand and led us out of the store and onto the street. I rubbed my face to hide the tears and snot from other people. It would look terrible if I walked around looking like a snot-filled mess with a boy.

“Where are we going?” I asked rushing to keep up with his pace. The boy had long legs and I could only do so much to keep up.

“Hmm, let’s go get some ice cream.”

“Ice cream? I’m lactose intolerant though,” I stated frowning a little bit at the suggestion.

“Yeah, I know you are. But half of the world is lactose intolerant too, though. That won’t stop them from indulging in a banana split every once in a while.”

“You’re an idiot.” I rolled my eyes and shoved him slightly, my strength toppling him over.

“Hey, but I’m an idiot you love.”

“Don’t push it.”

“Ok.”

321 notes · View notes