#and riley is about demonstrating that at every turn

[myhyperfixationisiforgot]

Look. Look at me. Look me in the eye. Riley Gunnarsdottir is important because people love her. So many people love her so fucking much. Yes, she's in part a story about how grief fills you up and empties you out like breathing but Riley is about reaching out. She reaches and someone always takes her hand. Folks offer her places to stay, they host her shows, they bring her supplies, they give her a ride and keep her safe and save her friends. Someone loves Riley enough to visit graves for her. Someone loves Riley enough to plan escape routes for her. Someone loves Riley enough to bring her aboard and flee the country with no questions except is he alright? In a series with so many characters defined by their relationships to one or two people outside the cluster, Riley has so many people in so many places that you can't even picture it and yet. Riley ran and someone caught her, everywhere, over and over and over.

[m4ctavish]

ghost — the apprentice.

masterlist.

pairing : simon “ghost” riley and gn!reader

desc : i can’t think of a funny description so, in short, ghost takes reader under his wing and teaches them a thing or two from his personal handbook. (“i’m reader and this is ghost and you’re watching jackass.” queue homemade c4 blowing up in the background)

a/n : ghost has reader on one of those kiddy leashes with like, a cat on it or smth.

simon “ghost” riley :

ghost really has to see something in you in order for him to even consider taking you under his wing. you’d have to show him that you’re worth him taking extra time out of his day to teach you something that you may just forget within the day

he can be a bit of an intimidating teacher. he’ll often quiz you on things he’s gone over with you within the past week or so, so you can either cover them again or figure out what you need to improve on.

there’s a variety of things he may go over depending on where your curiosity lies. guerilla warfare, hand to hand, knife efficiency, etc.

knife efficiency would likely be the one he’s the most serious about— he kind of has to be. all it takes is your target turning around and reacting before you do. perhaps you’re already efficient with a knife but there’s always room for improvement and ghost offers a plethora of information one normally wouldn’t know. he’s circling you like a hawk the entire time you go through the forms he taught you, stepping in with an occasional but jarring, “wrong.” every now and then. he’d then move to correct either your posture or the way you’re holding your blade. on another hand, if the two of you are doing a spar session for him to get a hands on assessment of your skill, he’ll be taking it as seriously as he does in the field. about maybe 30 seconds in, you’ll end up with a knife pressed up against your ribs, “you’re dead. stop being so open unless you want to get yourself killed.” or to your throat, “dead again. fix it.” he understands that sometimes mistakes happen. it’s just human nature. but he wants you to be able to minimize those chances so you don’t end up with a gun pressed to your head when you failed an otherwise safe takedown.

hand to hand is essentially the same. he’ll go through some forms with you, as well as a few moves. some are meant for immobilizing, others with the intent of knocking someone out cold. he’ll give you a demonstration on a training dummy beforehand, making sure to explain thoroughly what exactly you’re aiming for as well as the amount of force that should be behind your hit. adding on to that, he’d single out all of the weak points on the human body and what it’d take to cause some damage. (leaves you a bit concerned about how he knows all of this but maybe you don’t want to know..)

guerilla warfare and learning to make do with limited resources would likely be the most enjoyable/fun. it’s almost like an arts and crafts class except your crafts teacher is a decorated war veteran who kills people for a living. he’d give you a demonstration beforehand, listing off what you may need given what you have around you, then he’d give you instructions for whatever it is you’ll be putting together and see how quickly you can assemble it. (maybe if you’re lucky, he’ll take you out to a clearing and let you try out your freshly assembled trip mine or smoke grenade. just to see how effective it is.)

make him proud in the field; put your new knowledge to use. show him that everything he told you and showed you didn’t just vanish from your mind overnight.

the two of you make one hell of a team on stealth missions. rest easy knowing that he’s got your back the entire time, even if he’s not in your line of sight. (“coming up on your six.” or “on you, mate.”)

once everything is clear and you’re sitting on the helo after exfil, he’ll give you an affirming pat on the shoulder and a nod of his head. (“did good. keep it up.”)

[hyperactively-me]

Hi 💜💜💜I was wondering if you can write a ghost x reader who one day just gets a drastic hair cut. Like they always just had long hair ina ponytail but they just randomly decide to get shoulder langth hair and bangs. Like how do u think he would react?

I did that today and I feel so out of my comfort zone but I'm also so happy I finally made a change

U can ignore me if u want 😅

(I also really love black tie affair ur amazing 😍)

first of all, i bet your hair looks amazing! second of all, thank you for complimenting black tie affair, i truly appreciate it. i really really hope you like this 🫡

Simon "Ghost" Riley was a quiet man whose actions shouted volumes. Above all, action is what catches people's attention. And for Ghost, well, action is the way he communicates best.

He had always liked your long hair, frequently admiring it for its beauty. It became a trademark feature of your look, generally pulled back in a tight ponytail that matched your lifestyle. It was pretty much the only hairstyle you wore around the base, becoming your trademark look. However, one defining day, you decided to get a dramatic haircut. You wanted some change in your life, a fun, harmless way of bringing about a breath of fresh air. After you settled on what new style you wanted, your hair was now shoulder length, with stylish bangs framing your face.

When you entered the room, the team members turned their heads in astonishment, their eyes widening at your transformed appearance. Ghost, known for his constantly veiled face, couldn't help but leave a momentary expression of amazement before composing himself. His penetrating eyes inspected every aspect of your new haircut. 

For a brief minute, the room was deafeningly still, and then Ghost's lips curved into a smile. He couldn't disguise the admiration in his eyes as he looked at you. His typical stoicism dissipated, replaced with a feeling of warmth.

He was so used to seeing you with your long hair pulled back that he never considered the notion that you had the chance to make such a drastic change. The idea that you could change your appearance in this manner had simply never crossed his mind. Personally, he never really cared for his hair, often having “mask hair,” as his teammates liked to call it. But seeing you with your hair like this, he has to admit, he's thrilled by it.

He finally spoke. "You look different," he said, his voice a blend of surprise and genuinity. He studies the way your hair falls about your face, eyes flitting to and fro. “I love it. It suits you.”

His remark made you feel relieved. You were concerned that the new haircut would not be properly welcomed by your teammates, but Ghost's reply, however slight, soothed you. His approval meant the world to you.

“Thank you,” you said, your lips pulled in a modest grin. “I thought it was time for a change. Something new, y'know?”

Ghost stepped closer, his presence both welcoming and reassuring. He extended a gloved hand, his fingertips brushing against the ends of your new hair. 

You still, mouth agape as he unabashedly takes in your appearance.

“It's refreshing,” he stated, nearly whispering. “Like you.”

Your cheeks flushed, and you couldn't help but feel a burst of confidence. Ghost's infrequent displays of vulnerability had that impact on you. Something about his usual quiet behavior made his comments carry more significance, amplifying even the tiniest praises. 

Ghost continued stealing looks in your direction as the mission briefing began, a little grin tugging at his lips. He just couldn't stop appreciating the way you looked. Every time you took a quick glance at him, he appeared enthralled by your new appearance, admiring it in a manner that only he could. You smile to yourself, knowing that he's really, truly, appreciating you.

Though Ghost's emotions were normally veiled in mystery, his reaction to your haircut demonstrated that he paid attention to every little detail. And you knew his appreciation extended beyond your physical appearance. It was a deeper connection, a subconscious understanding that existed between the two of you.

Ghost's silent support remained consistent throughout the assignment, as did his faith in your skills. You couldn't help but be thankful for his subtle but significant presence in your life. And while you stood side by side, you couldn't help but think that change wasn't always about haircuts, but also about the unforeseen ways it altered the ties we had with those we cared about the most. Especially the way you and Ghost knew each other.

[hannahshattuck]

Daddy and His Kitten

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Steve Rogers

Rating: Explicit

Square: G2 - Spread Eagle, O1 - AU: Modern

Tags: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, BDSM, Dom Bucky Barnes, Sub Steve Rogers, Sex Club, Anal Sex, Collars, Twunk Steve Rogers, Top Bucky Barnes, Bottom Steve Rogers, Beefy Bucky Barnes, Daddy Kink, Sex Toys, Butt Plugs, Spreader Bars, Humiliation, Name-Calling, Aftercare, Cuddles

Summary: “My Kitten. My Good Boy. Doin’ everything Daddy tells ya, huh?" “Yes, Daddy.” “Are you ready to give everyone a show? Let all those people out there know that you’re Daddy’s good boy?” “Yes, Daddy.”

Written for @allcapsbingo All Caps Bingo Masterlist

“Are you ready, Kitten?” Bucky purred in Steve’s ear as he clasped the collar around the blond’s neck. “Do you remember what to say if you want to stop?”

Steve nodded, “Yankee.”

Bucky kissed Steve’s neck where it met his shoulder, “Good boy.”

Bucky walked around Steve and admired his boy for a moment. The deep purple rope tied Steve’s arms behind his back and the same colored panties accentuated the younger man’s ass. The front of the panties cradled his cock and balls, which compared to Bucky are small. The thick, black collar with flat circular studs was clasped tight around Steve’s neck without constricting his breathing. Bucky attached the leather leash to the O-ring at the front of Steve’s collar. He wrapped it around his hand, shortening the length which caused Steve to stumble forward.

“My Kitten. My Good Boy.” Bucky captured Steve’s lips in a steamy kiss. “Doin’ everything Daddy tells ya, huh?”

Steve’s eyes glazed over as he nodded, “Yes, Daddy.”

Bucky licked his lips as he let the leash slowly unravel from his hand. “Are you ready to give everyone a show? Let all those people out there know that you’re Daddy’s good boy?”

“Yes, Daddy.” Steve’s eyes rolled back as Bucky cupped his rapidly hardening dick.

“Then let’s go show them.” Bucky grabbed the end of the leash and gently pulled, a signal for Steve to follow him. The dom led his sub out of the dressing room and through the hallway that led to the main club area. 

The club, The Cave, had couches along the perimeter walls with tables every six feet that people can use for anything. Some doms put their subs on the tables for everyone to see as they play with them, something Bucky is about to do with Steve. 

Bucky led Steve to the table where some of their friends were. Nat and her sub Clint, Sam and his partner Riley, and Tony, Pepper and their sub Peter. Bucky told Steve to lean over the table which caused his ass to be higher than his chest, the perfect height for Bucky to play with him. Once Steve was bent over the table, Bucky grabbed the spreader bar he had Nat hold for him and attached the cuffs to Steve’s ankles, forcing his legs far apart. Bucky chose a pretty long one on purpose because he wanted Steve spread for what Bucky had planned.

A small crowd started gathering when they saw Bucky and Steve. The two men were popular around the club because of the demonstrations they do on a regular basis. Bucky reached into his pocket and pulled a small bottle of lube and a plug, the latter of which he held in front of Steve’s mouth. “Open.” Bucky commanded. Steve, being the good boy, opened his mouth and moaned when the plug was placed in his mouth. “Get that all nice and wet for Daddy.”

Steve sucked the plug as if he was sucking Bucky’s dick. Without the use of his hands, since they were tied behind him, Steve had to use the table to his advantage. He turned his head so he could balance the flat end of the plug on the table and bobbed his head. The mock blow job was sloppy with the strange angle Steve had but goddammit if he wasn’t going to be a good boy for his Daddy.

“That’s my boy.” Bucky gripped the side seams of the purple lace panties and ripped them causing Steve to moan in protest. “Don’t worry your pretty little head, Kitten. I’ll buy you more.” Bucky flipped the cap of the lube bottle and drizzled lube between Steve’s cheeks. Bucky’s thumb spread lube all around the sub’s hole before dipping in. “God, Kitten. This hole’s just suckin’ me in. Does it want to be filled? You get that plug nice and wet?” Steve nodded. Bucky reached around and grabbed the plug. 

Strings of saliva connect the plug and Steve’s bottom lip. Bucky wiped the excess saliva on Steve’s cheek and then placed the tip of the plug against the younger man’s hole. The plug itself was smaller girth wise than Steve usually takes but length wise it would just graze his prostate. He also told Bucky he wanted minimal prep so he felt the burn and Bucky agreed but only if a thin plug was used. He didn’t want to hurt Steve in an unpleasant way.

“Alright, gonna fill you now. Remember, use your safeword if you need to Kitten.”

“Yes, Daddy.”

Steve groaned as the plug slid into his hole. He squirmed at the burn but a slap to his ass from Bucky made him stop. That was Bucky’s way of warning him to be still so he didn’t hurt himself. Steve gasped as the whole plug slid home. The tip just grazed Steve prostate and when Bucky pushed his palm against the base of the plug, the tip pressed on that special button inside Steve.

“Yeeessss, Daddy.” Steve moaned and tried to rock against Bucky. The older man pulled his hand away and grabbed Steve’s shoulder so he was standing. Steve forgot that the spreader bar was still attached to his ankles and stumbled when he tried to take a step back to press against Bucky. 

“Oh, baby. Did you forget about the bar? Ya get that hole filled and just forget everything else, huh? Just a slut aren’cha?” Bucky teases. His hands slid to the front of Steve’s body and tweaked the sub’s nipples. Those small buds felt like they were connected straight to Steve’s dick when Bucky dug his nails into them. Steve’s nipples have always been sensitive to the nth degree and Bucky exploits that knowledge as much as he can. 

Steve could feel the fabric of Bucky’s shirt brushing against his hands and gripped it in his hands. Bucky threw the tattered remains of Steve’s panties to the side with one hand while his other hand wrapped around Steve’s dick stroking it to full hardness. 

“Look at that little thing.” Bucky looked over Steve’s shoulder at the dick in his hand. “Just a tiny thing. That’s why you’re my boy, huh?” Bucky ground his erection into Steve’s ass. “Feel that, Kitten? That’s a Daddy cock. Not a tiny boy dick like yours.” 

Steve’s knee buckled at Bucky’s words. His dick is smaller than Bucky’s, yes, but not by much. But hearing Bucky talk about Steve’s dick like that makes his insides tingle.

“Now why don’t we show this crowd what a good cockslut you are?” Bucky chuckled darkly in Steve’s ear. The dom helped Steve shuffle over to the couch, laying Steve on his stomach. The spreader bar kept him spread eagle and Bucky grabbed Steve’s ass, a cheek in each hand.

Bucky tapped the base of the plug and Steve groaned with every hit to his prostate. Bucky then gripped the base and slowly slid it out, letting the widest part catch on Steve’s rim. The plug wasn’t as thick as Bucky but he knew his boy loved the burn. The dom pulled the plug all the way out and set it on the table. He then grabbed the lube, that Sam so graciously held for him, undid his pants to pull his cock out and lathered it in lube.

“You ready, Kitten? Ready to show everyone what a cockslut you are?” Bucky lined his dick up and slowly pushed into Steve’s tight hole. The warmth that encompassed him made curses fall from his hip. Bucky gripped the rope that tied Steve’s arms and used it to pull Steve’s body on his dick. Everything thrust caused Bucky’s balls to slap against Steve’s and the noises coming out of his boy was telling Bucky he was nailing Steve’s prostate on every thrust. Groans were heard all around Bucky reminding him they had an audience. He saw someone take a few steps to them and Bucky glared at him.

“Mine.” Bucky growled. The man looked like he didn’t want to listen until Sam and Riley stood up from their seats and stared the man down. The idiot made a smart move and turned away with a scoff. Bucky pounded Steve and the blond’s dick swung with every thrust. 

“I’m close.” Bucky warned as his thrusts sped up. Steve moaned under him as his dick slapped against his stomach.

“M-me too-oo, Daddyyyy.” Steve whined.

“Yeah? Gonna come when I tell ya?”

Steve nodded.

“Gonna come on Daddy’s cock?”

Steve whined.

“C’mon then, Kitten. Come on Daddy’s cock.”

Steve’s voice left his body as he came untouched, something that has never happened. He was cognizant enough to feel Bucky’s release but blackout shortly after.

When he came to, Steve was wrapped in his favorite fuzzy blanket that smelt like his Daddy and fingers were running through his hair. Bucky was speaking softly to him slowly bringing Steve back to the land of the living. Once Steve felt more in control of his body, he snuggled into Bucky’s chest.

“There’s my snuggly kitten.” Bucky kissed the top of Steve’s head. “How do you feel, Steve?” Bucky always used his name when Steve was coming out of that floaty place to hopefully keep the sub from dropping. It also gave Steve something to latch onto if he was having a hard time coming out of that floaty place.

Steve took stock of his body. His shoulders were a little sore from his arms being tied behind his back but no sharp pain. Just the same soreness he feels after a long gym session. His ass was the perfect, post fuck soreness that he always craved and the rest of his arms and ankles felt perfectly fine.

“I feel good, Bucky.” Steve smiled up at Bucky who placed a kiss on the younger man’s nose.

“That’s good, Kitten. Could you eat a little bit for me? I got your favorite candy.”

Steve perked up, “Jellybeans?”

Bucky chuckled as he grabbed the Ziploc bag next to him, “Absolutely. Only the best for my baby.”

Steve preened as he grabbed the bag. “I love you, Daddy.”

Bucky smiled as he watched his boy dig into the bag, “I love you too, Kitten.”

[d2kvirus]

Dickheads of the Month: November 2023

As it seems that there are people who say or do things that are remarkably dickheaded yet somehow people try to make excuses for them or pretend it never happened, here is a collection of some of the dickheaded actions we saw in the month of November 2023 to make sure that they are never forgotten.  

Once again the Israeli Defence Forces decided to insult the intelligence of everybody else with their suggestion that it's okay for them to bomb ambulances as those were Hamas ambulances as opposed to regular, non-Hamas ambulances

...and it was the turn of Gilad Erdan to demonstrate, while once again wearing a gold star in the UN chamber, just how much of an open season on the intelligence of people listening to lie after lie by claiming that every single UN peacekeeper killed by the IDF were actually secret Hamas members, which somehow didn't have him dragged out of the chamber and told that he should fuck off and stay fucked off until he comes back to withdraw his remarks

...and when it fell to Isaac Herzog to insult the intelligence of the world, he pulled out a pristine copy of Mein Kampf and claimed it was found in the bombed-out remains of a children's living room with various Post-It notes to annotate it as if that somehow justifies bombing all Palestinian children - yet Laura Kuenssberg failed to challenge this patently absurd claim at any point in spite the claim being made on her show

...yet for some reason Grant Schapps decided he wanted in on the action, trying to justify Israel bombing civilians left, right and centre on Laura Kuenssberg's show by bringing up the Allied bombing of Dresden in World War II - which just so happened to be the exact same line which genocide denier Tzipi Hotovely used a couple of weeks previously trying to shut down Kay Burley on her show

...and then it was back to smears, with Eylon Levy dismissing the hundreds of thousands on the streets of London marching for peace by calling them "rape apologists", while David Collier accused it of being the largest antisemitic march in the history of the west, because that's going to turn the tide of the PR War that Israel have been losing one hospital bombing at a time

...then we had Aviva Klompas getting on on the "evidence" train, claiming to have found "evidence" that Hamas had tunnels under one of the various hospitals the Israelis had bombed, only for that "evidence" to not be a rota of guards and prisoners and merely just a calendar which was written in Arabic

...meanwhile along came Mark Regev to claim that Israel are not firing at hospitals but are firing at Hamas, which suggests that Israel has shitty aim since they keep hitting hospitals and not Hamas

...as opposed to Nir Barkat telling Palestinians that they should be thankful that Israel haven't dropped nukes on them - those would be the nukes Israel spent decades denying having, imprisoning Mordechai Vanunu for sixteen years for revealing the fact - while also throwing in the nugget accusing Hamas of committing atrocities worse than the Nazis ever had because why the fuck not at this point

...though it appears that Fox News were getting antsy about Israel's habitual lying without being asked to help out, which is why they were brought in to film the Israeli forces capturing a Hamas operative live on their channel - before unintentionally filming the Israeli forces chatting with the actor who they had playing a Hamas operative before being ordered to turn their cameras off

...though when it came time for Campaign Against Antisemitism to stage their own march, the main takeaway from the march was the one where Tommy Robinson was taken away by police - though some of the other attendees, such as proven liar Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson and Julia Hartley Brewer, as well as other noted figures of tolerance and valid arguments such as Eddie Marsan, Rachel Riley, Tracy Ann Oberman and Maureen Lipman

Fascist pitbull Suella Braverman must have realised there was a section of society she hadn't kicked in the ribs for a few weeks because there is no other logical explanation for her deciding to describe homelessness as a "lifestyle choice" while demanding that charities stop supplying tents to the homeless

...and because Suella Braverman was on her uppers she then started ranting about a pro-Palestine march at the Cenotaph on Remembrance Sunday, which saw the Metropolitan Police issuing a statement which would not look out of place if uttered by Judge Dredd while Turning Point UK outright threatened the police by saying they had 24 hours to ban the march or they would be marching themselves and would not be taking prisoners, and then the Daily Mail waded in with a front page howling about how awful it would be if there was a riot at the Cenotaph. There was just one problem with this whole situation: no pro-Palestine march was scheduled for Remembrance Sunday and certainly not at the Cenotaph, it was scheduled for the Saturday like every other march which Braverman previously called "hate marches" - a term which, funnily enough, she did not use for TPUK's threatened walking riot

...and after all that Suella Braverman took the unusual (read: utterly fucking barmy) step of writing a column in The Times attacking the Metropolitan Police for not banning a protest which she had apparently made up judging by the numerous factual errors in her description of it, and then going further by accusing the police of bias for banning English Defence League marches (where there tend to be a lot of cases of assault from the people on them) and then foregoing her dogwhistle for a foghorn by claiming the police went easy on the Black Lives Matter protests compared to the anti-lockdown protests, at which point the question really needs asking about who the puppeteer with their hand up her backside is

...which led to a bout of hysterics from the Daily Mail as their front page screamed at the suggestion that Braverman could be sacked that "If you come for Suella you come for all of us", which only further begged the question who the us of that sentence is

...and so it came to bonehead messiah Tommy Robinson to commemorate Remembrance Day by leading his band of brainless dolts down Whitehall - a place, lest I remind you, is where there wasn't a pro-Palestine protest - where it all kicked off. However, it is highly sinister that both the BBC and Daily Mail framed their breaking story of the English Defence League et al kicking off as being the fault of the pro-Palestine march which, for the umpteenth time, was well over a mile away

...all of which led to Suella Braverman getting unceremoniously sacked the Monday morning after Remembrance Sunday, though for some reason the Daily Mail have not been particularly quick in standing up to fight for her

...yet somehow Rishi Sunak seemed to forget he sacked Braverman, as when her Rwanda policy was unanimously deemed unlawful by the Supreme Court his response was to bleat about "foreign courts" when the Supreme Court is literally across the road from the Houses of Parliament or, if you prefer, less than ten minutes walk from Downing Street

It's quite hilarious seeing billionaire manchild Elon Musk talking about how AI is the greatest threat to humanity as if AI doesn't make up the majority of his Twitter followers at this point, but then he went and showed what the actual threat to humanity by showing up on Joe Rogan's podcast a few hours later to spout all manner of medically illiterate bilge about how ventilators were the true cause of death during the worst of the Covid pandemic

...and then billionaire manchild Elon Musk treated us to another one of his genius ideas, one which would definitely get Twitter's revenues back up: reinstating the accounts of Tommy Robinson and Katie Hopkins, because the Freeze Peach absolutist didn't reinstate them the second he got his feet under the desk and hopes nobody would notice there were lines he wouldn't cross until he went full fash

...and then billionaire manchild Elon Musk decided that he would congratulate stochastic terrorist Chaya Raichik when Raichik posted a photo of her posting with the USA Today front page stating that whenever she tweets something bomb threats inevitably follow, because apparently it's normal to congratulate somebody revelling in their being identified as a terror threat

...but because billionaire manchild Elon Musk is just that pathetic, it emerged that billionaire manchild Elon Musk programmed his own AI program - remember, this is the same person saying that AI is a threat to mankind - to say that he is the greatest memelord, which any psychiatrist would suggest is making their job too obvious

...and then billionaire manchild Elon Musk banned the Twitter account that was an AI bot making Junlper posts, no doubt steamed both by the fact an AI bot of someone he banned from his Freeze Peach platform where comedy is legal for making a joke about him, and because that AI was far less cringe than creating one to say the one thing nobody has ever said about Elon Musk: he is funny

...but because billionaire manchild Elon Musk cannot help by demonstrate why he needs to pay an AI to agree with him, he then responded to an antisemitic tweet directly by saying "You have said the actual truth" while also accusing the Anti Defamation League of "pushing anti-white racism" because apparently the best way to combat the ADL accounting for the casual racism and antisemitism on Twitter ever since the billionaire manchild bought the platform is to prove their point by endorsing and indulging in antisemitism

...remember how billionaire manchild Elon Musk also has a car company? Well he then demonstrated how committed to Freeze Peach he is by sneaking a clause into the contract of every Cybertruck sale saying that if anyone tries to sell theirs within a year of buying it they will get sued for it

...and then billionaire manchild Elon Musk tweeted a thinly-veiled threat about graves of his enemies, and by "thinly-veiled threat" I mean "twelve year-old talking like Sephiroth thinking that it makes them sound cool and edgy"

...but wait, billionaire manchild Elon Musk had even more material to sustain his perpetual case of Main Character Syndrome, and that material was...a meme about Pizzagate, as if that hadn't been debunked as hard as the legitimacy of his follower account years ago

...yet there was still time for billionaire manchild Elon Musk to show the world how fucking cool and edgy he is by literally saying "Go fuck yourself" to a social media platform overrun by racism and homophobia while the owner of the platform signal boosts all manner of antisemitic and Islamophobic conspiracy theories

Of all the lines that Lahav Harkov could have chosen to try and justify everything Netanhayu and the IDF are doing in Palestine, her claiming that they are aiming to "denazify" Palestine is easily the worst line to take what with that being the exact same line Putin and his stooges used and continue to use in order to justify attacking Ukraine last year, because that makes it a little too obvious

Remember last month when Rachel Riley swiftly deleted a tweet where she inadvertently compared Jews Against Genocide to Nazis? Well she decided to double down on it after all, accusing them of trying to "kosherise" pro-Palestinian sentiment which definitely does not sound like she is invoking the highly antisemitic trop of "the wrong kind of Jew"

So now we have proven liar Boris Johnson jetting off to Israel to state that the British public stands in solidarity with the bombers of hospitals, ambulances and refugee camps, in spite being in no position to say this due to not being a minister of even an MP as well as the hard to ignore fact that he has previous for jetting off to war zones when trying to avoid enquiries, as he had frequent flyer miles to Ukraine when the Partygate enquiry had him over a barrel - which mainly begs the question who was paying for him to be over there at a time the Covid enquiry is making it plain to see that he was happy to let the bodies pile high

Suffice to say Andrea Jenkyns did not respond to her sacking well, given she immediately sent a No Confidence letter to the 1922 Committee which was riddled with spelling, punctuation and grammatical errors that only served to justify booting her out of the Education Department

...and yet Rishi Sunak can somehow fuck up a reshuffle after kicking out truly toxic indivduals such as Braverman, Jenkyns and Therese Coffey, as he announced Esther McVey as Minister for Common Sense - the same Esther McVey who has hosted a show on GB News for the past three years in spite still being an MP, because nothing says "common sense" like GB News!

The Covid enquiry made it known that Matt Hancock wanted to use the worst of the pandemic to play God, as he wanted to say who would live and who would die - which somehow hasn't come up whenever he appears on yet another celebrity gameshow in the belief he can Ed Balls his image

...the same enquiry also heard that proven liar Boris Johnson was at one point willing to go on national television and be injected with Covid to prove that it was perfectly safe to do so, which in retrospect was a missed opportunity given it also emerged that he did, in spite of numerous lackeys' insistence, say he'd rather the bodies piled high than call another lockdown

Chainsaw-wielding berk Javier Miliei has already started wittering about the Falkland Islands and chatting about military action to reclaim them all while cutting government funding to infrastructure spending, which is sure won't lead to anything unfortunate happening to him sooner rather than later...

Nominative determinism debunker James Cleverley got off to a good start as Home Secretary when he described Stockton North as a shithole, and when trying to deny he called it a shithole first claimed somebody else called Stockton North a shithole before further digging a shithole for himself by trying to say he actually said something about a "ship poll"

Just when you think that Rishi Sunak cannot be any more of a national embarrassment he refuses to meet with Greek PM Kyriakos Mitsotakis due to Mitsotakis saying he wanted the Elgin Marbles returned to Greece, which is really helpful for his tackling of "small boats" by immediately pissing off a key ally in the Mediterranean and further pissing them off by trying to suggest he put a gag order on mentioning the Elgin Marbles when the story was about how Sunak made himself look like a small, petty man

The suddenly ubiquitous Richard Tice decided by to dust off that old George Carlin routine about how the planet actually needs lots of carbon dioxide in the atmosphere in order to feed plants, somehow unaware that Carlin's routine was this thing called "satire" and not a symposium on climate science, but no doubt the climate change deniers that donated literally every penny to The Nigel Farage's Ego Party will be happy with Tice being performatively stupid in order to appeal to people whose stupidity is not performative

You have to hand it to Spyglass Media for screwing the pooch so spectacularly when they fired Melissa Barrera from Scream 7 for sharing a Jewish Currents article written by Jewish Raz Sagal which suggests that Israel is committing acts of genocide by accusing her of sharing antisemitic hate speech (for sharing an article from a Jewish publication written by a Jew, for those at home keeping score) - and within 24 hours of Barrera's sacking Jenna Ortega left the project (as nobody believes the official line she suddenly had commitments to Wednesday which were never previously mentioned) meaning half of the core cast was gone because of Spyglass' complete overreaction

In the mind of Susan Hall somebody handing her back her wallet after she dropped it on the Tube, with all the money and other contents still inside when it was handed back to her, is "evidence" of what a lawless hellhole that London has become under Sadiq Khan - and this is why you should vote for her in the London mayoral election, because she assumes that a good deed is obviously proof that somebody stole her property and she should go on LBC and say so at the earliest opportunity. She's the one that Sadiq Khan fears, didn't you know...?

Militant TERF JK Rowling once again did something that wasn't obvious transphobic by calling the trans community "rapist rights activists" which at least can be said is in line with the usual standard of her writing

Once again Warner Bros decide that releasing films which they have spent an enormous amount of money producing is not something a Hollywood studio should be doing, this time junking Coyote vs ACME for a $30m tax writeoff - and then issuing copyright takedowns for any behind the scenes material which was already online, because apparently you can unperson an entire film now

To celebrate N7 Day BioWare took the interesting approach of taking the devs who sued for severance which they have not been paid to court rather than negotiating a settlement, which really holds up well on the day to remember the importance of loyalty to your crew

Purveyors of Freeze Peach GB News demonstrated just how committed they are to the concept of Freeze Peach by throwing Michael Crick off of a panel discussion because he was exercising his right of Freeze Peach during a GB news quote-unquote discussion to criticise the channel

Failed nepo baby Laurence Fox claimed, in court, that if he wasn't accused of racism for repeatedly posting racist things online he could have played Batman, before bleating about his good name being sullied as if he hadn't done that by failing to have an acting career in spite coming from an acting dynasty

I get the feeling that Nadine Dorries would not fare well under cross examination, given it took all of ten seconds in an LBC interview to blurt out the Dr No her utterly dreadful book keeps talking about was Dougie Smith - and as a result now she is running the risk of being sued by Dougie Smith for, among other things, saying he murdered the pet rabbit of an ex-girlfriend's kid brother and nailing its remains to their front door

And the most pathetic excuse goes to Ivanka Trump for trying to get out of testifying against daddy dearest by saying that she should be excused as the date she was slated to testify was during a school week and that would cause disruption. This would be Ivanka Trump who has six nannies and four babysitters on payroll, whose mother in law lives two blocks away, and who regularly has her sister in law babysit her kids when she's galivanting around the globe

...equally pathetic was Eric Trump tweeting an obviously Photoshopped photo of him with Daddy Dearest trying to suggest he and the kids had an inseparable bond...which would mean he wouldn't have to knock up an image on Photoshop to suggest that he was there at one point during any Christmas of their childhoods

Of course Martin Daubney and Ben Leo were both crowing about the record ratings for the first episode of I'm A Celebrity with waffling gargoyle Nigel Farage as an occasional contestant (though he isn't integrating with all Bushtucker Trials after going to another country...), but there was a slight problem: the figures they were quoting was for the 2022 edition of I'm A Celebrity, which were 2.2m higher than this year's, which had the lowest audience for a debut episode since 2002

For some reason Bethesda came to the conclusion that the best way to approach Steam reviews for Starfield suggesting the game is a bit dull is for the Steam account Bethesda use for customer support to start lecturing people for not enjoying their boring game

Noted NFT scammers Bored Ape Yacht Club manged to stage a party which blinded several of those who attended, which is the best way to treat the handful of people who haven't cottoned onto NFTs being a scam created by crypto bros to prop up the scam that is the cryptocurrency market which has been plummeting in value due to scams not being a solid foundation for any kind of market

[dishtothedeath]

…E-I-E-1-01001111 [CH 4 Start, 2/2]

You could have sworn there was no one there a moment ago, but looking towards the source of the voice confirms what your ears already suspected—Sunny is standing with you all, looking as normal and not-dead as can be. And not just him, either. Taking a look around the group, you can spot nearly every dead contestant standing with the rest of you. 

It seems like Skull-kun is just as confused as you are. His pixel eyes blink, then scan the hologram. Then blink again.

"T-this isn't… What? How did you—" 

Skull-kun stutters, clearly no longer on script. Sunny doesn’t need a script.

“Bro, me too. Who knew Riley would pull through? Thanks to him, we found the hologram tech you used to fuck with people last motive.”

He walks right through Manqian’s body, turns around, and waves, just to demonstrate.

Biscuit Beastie’s hand twitches, like it’s thinking about grabbing him– but how do you grab a hologram?

Ides 2.0, unlike the other two robots, doesn’t seem all that shocked by this development. Delighted, sure, but the grin on their face looks vaguely knifecat-like rather than surprised.

“Ahaha… oh nooo! Oh well! Guess they’re here now! Nothing we can do about that, huh? Welcome back! Sorta!”

[To be continued in #pub-1]

[mmorgautomation]

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[turtlethon]

“My Brother the Bad Guy”

Season 5, Episode 4 First US Airdate: September 14, 1991

Shredder’s brother teams up with the Turtles to try and prevent the Technodrome to returning from Dimension X.

Season five of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles begins its proper Saturday morning run with “My Brother the Bad Guy”. Dennis O’Flaherty is credited as writer here, returning following his debut on the show last year with “Beyond the Donatello Nebula”.

Donatello reveals his latest invention to the other Turtles, “a state-of-the-art snack machine” that can generate any desired food on demand. After it begins firing off peanut butter and broccoli popcorn, Donnie defends his creation, pointing out that such an odd combination “is a change!” Splinter steps in to remind the Turtles that not every change is for the better. Great insight there, sometimes things get worse. Who knew?

The Turtles head to the living room, and are dismayed to find Vernon presenting Channel 6’s news report instead of April. He updates viewers on a break-in that occurred at the site of the university’s new fusion reactor. Moments later, April contacts our heroes via Turtlecom and introduces them to Mr. Riley, a security guard who saw the culprit: “He was a big brute, covered with spikes, he was, wearin’ a cape. And his face was covered with a metal mask.” April points out that Shredder wasn’t able to get past the main security barrier, but will likely try again.

In Tokyo, at the Ninja Hall of Fame – where all the signage is helpfully in English – Shredder teleports in, complaining loudly about not being represented by any of the exhibits. He smashes a glass cabinet containing a diary owned by the Kojima brothers, a trio of legendary ninja warriors.

After Shredder escapes through another portal, two police officers rush into the museum. They’re accompanied by Lieutenant Saki, who tears into both men as one of them has a loose button on their uniform. Saki goes on to examine the glass cabinet and uses a handheld gadget to identify the fingerprint of “master criminal Oroku Saki, also known as... Shredder!” Lieutenant Saki vows to bring his older sibling to justice.

Several evenings pass with the Turtles sneaking into the reactor site to guard the location from Shredder. On the third night, they instead find themselves face to face with Lieutenant Saki, who refers to them as “ninja hoodlums wearing Turtle costumes”. (How could he know about his brother’s criminal exploits and not know about the Turtles?)

In an ungainly bit of animation, Lieutenant Saki disarms Donatello and hurls him across the room. He charges the Turtles with “breaking and entering, assaulting a police officer and... impersonating large aquatic reptiles!” When Leonardo picks up on Saki having the same last name as Shredder, he denies having any familial connection to the notorious supervillain, insisting that this is just a coincidence. After the Turtles receive a message from April via Turtlecom revealing that Acme Electronics was just robbed by someone matching Shredder’s description, Lieutenant Saki agrees to team up with the Turtles to track down their mutual enemy.

The Lieutenant accompanies the Turtles in their van, barking instructions to them and pointing out all of the minor violations being carried out by the team, such as their license sticker being on the wrong side. When the Turtles spot Shredder across the street running into a van with stolen goods, his brother refuses to let them pursue him, as a traffic light has turned red.

Shredder’s penchant for operating out of abandoned warehouses seemed to fade away through season four, but is back in effect now, as he demonstrates the results of his robberies to Bebop and Rocksteady. The equipment that he’s stolen has allowed for the creation of holograms of the Kojima Brothers, “warriors of the dread [sic] Kurakuasu Ninja Clan”. Far from being mere projections, Shredder goes on to add that these are “solid holograms”, programmed with the fighting moves of three of the greatest ninjas of all time. (This is one of those times where I wish the Hero Turtles versions of these episodes were still in circulation, as the word “ninja” is uttered so many times here that the edited version of this adventure must have been borderline incomprehensible.)

Krang calls in to demand an update, as the Technodrome is due to return to Earth tonight. In a demonstration of his confidence in the Scheme of the Day, Shredder arranges for a test of his holograms by asking for his dummies. Poor Bebop and Rocksteady are confused by this, pointing out that they’re already present, but it eventually becomes clear that Shreds is referring to a group of mannequins resembling the Turtles. The Kojima Brother holograms attack and destroy the four dummies: in a possible nod to the original Mirage Comics incarnation of our heroes, all of them sport red bandanas and pads.

Act two begins with Shredder providing Rocksteady with a projector device containing the holograms, which bears a startling resemblance to the Kenner Real Ghostbusters Ghost Zapper toy. The Boys are ordered to place the device in the sewers to draw the attention of the Turtles.

In a shocking lapse of security, the Turtles allow the incredible narc that is Lieutenant Saki, a man who could easily turn all of them into the local authorities, into the Lair. Splinter is also present, and for a guy who constantly plays up his heightened senses and intuition, he doesn’t pick up on the fact that this is the brother of the guy he’s been in a blood feud with for years. In a surprising move, the Sensei of the Turtles does point out that Shredder’s previous attempt to use holograms involved a plot to kidnap the President, a nod to fan favourite episode “Cowabunga Shredhead” from two years prior.

Lieutenant Saki suggests to Splinter and the Turtles that the thefts of the diaries and electronics equipment aren’t the real issue, and pale in comparison to Shredder’s attempts to get access to the fusion reactor. After Splinter quips that “the more numerous the strands, the stronger the rope” in reference to the alliance between the Lieutenant and the Turtles, Leonardo responds that it’ll be “the better to hang Shredder”. I haven’t heard Leo be this forthright about his desire to kill Shreds since season one. Even Splinter looks taken aback.

Rocksteady and Bebop show a surprising amount of strategic insight as they wedge the projector into a sewer wall on the way to Vinnie’s Pizza. It doesn’t take long for the Turtles, who are travelling through the sewers with the Lieutenant, to encounter the holographic ninjas generated by the device. Our heroes head into battle against the Kojima Brothers while the younger Saki leaves to confront his brother.

Shredder returns to the site of the fusion reactor, accompanied by his mutant henchmen. He has Rocksteady tamper with a fuse box, after which the rhino manages to trip over himself and stumble down a flight of stairs from a completely static position. In a way it’s actually kind of impressive. Back in the sewers, the Turtles continue to fight the three ninjas, one of whom has Skeletor-style “Terror Claws” that allow him to demolish a brick wall with a single swipe. In the Lair, Splinter uses that intuition of his to sense that the Turtles are in danger, and rushes off to help them.

Shredder stands in a control room with an absurdly huge cartoon magnet and checks in with Krang again. Their scheme will involve using the reactor to create a magnetic pulse that’ll pass through a portal, pulling the Technodrome out of the lava bed it’s currently wedged in. Before Shredder can fully execute this plan, he’s confronted by Lieutenant Saki. Shreds can’t contain his laughter at being placed under arrest by his baby brother – whose first name is revealed during this altercation as Kazuo – and briefly pretends that he’s about to go along peacefully before using the Lieutenant’s own handcuffs to restrain him.

Splinter tracks down the Turtles and directly confronts the Kojima Brothers, noting that they should be long dead and that he doesn’t believe in ghosts. Uh, he directly interacted with the spirit of Shibano-sama, the ancient founder of the Foot Clan, in the clip show episode “Blast from the Past”. Kinda weird that this story referenced a season three episode earlier, but completely glosses over another one that incontrovertibly confirmed ghosts definitely exist in the TMNT 1987 universe. Anyway, the brothers respond that it isn’t necessary for Splinter to believe they exist – they can finish him off anyway. The trio launch into an attack on the mutant rat as the second act reaches its conclusion.

The final portion of the episode begins with Donatello spotting the projector and destroying it with his bo, causing the Kojima Brothers to disintegrate. Splinter urges the Turtles to hurry and confront Shredder.

Krang alerts Shredder to the fact that his plan isn’t working, and in fact the Technodrome is now becoming even further wedged into the hardened lava. Shreds responds by having the fortress roll back and forth to loosen the lava’s grip. Elsewhere in the facility, Bebop and Rocksteady hold off a group of police officers outside by engaging in a laser shoot-out. The Turtles sneak in and interrupt this, with Donatello deploying a bucket of water on a wheeled trolley that somehow knocks the boys down a flight of stairs.

Krang commands that Shredder crank the reactor up to full power, and the Technodrome finally begins to rise out of the lava. The villains are confronted by the Turtles, who are shocked when Shredder reveals that the Lieutenant is his younger brother. Shreds is about to open fire upon the team with a blaster until a well-placed kick knocks the weapon across the room. Meanwhile the green teens fight Rocksteady and Bebop, with a stray energy blast shattering the chains of Kazuo’s handcuffs. The Sakis battle once more, with Shredder getting hurled back through the portal to the Technodrome. Bebop and Rocksteady quickly follow him back to headquarters.

Through a viewscreen, Krang and Shredder taunt the Turtles, pointing out that it’s now too late to stop them: the Technodrome is hurtling through space, and will soon arrive on Earth. Donatello quickly works to devise a counter-attack, re-aligning the magnet’s polarity to alter the path of the fortress. Instead of landing in New York, the Technodrome crashes in the frozen arctic. Rocksteady is gleeful at the prospect of a snow day and not having to go to school tomorrow; when Bebop points out neither of them have been to school for fifteen years, the rhino explains that he knows, but still enjoys pointing it out. Meanwhile the deflated Shredder and Krang both demand someone bring them hot water bottles.

Back in the Lair, Kazuo outlines to the Turtles his hopes that Shredder will be reformed by the time he escapes from the polar ice cap. Splinter responds that a leopard doesn’t change his spots so easily, before presenting a sushi meal. Michaelangelo declines, declaring that he’s a leopard who’s spots also haven’t changed, and that he “growls... for pizza!” Everyone has a good 1980s sitcom-style chortle, except for Mikey, who suddenly appears to be having some kind of severe digestive pain.

I’m a sucker for any story that expands upon the lore of the series, and this is probably the most world building we’ve had in the show for a while. While episodes not written by David Wise or Michael Reaves sometimes feel as if they exist within some sort of secondary tier of canonicity, where not much tends to happen of any real consequence in the greater scheme of things, that obviously isn’t the case here. Not only do we get that little nod to prior events in “Cowabunga Shredhead”, the ending is enough in itself to make this a historically significant episode in the greater scope of TMNT’s run. (As mentioned in the “Planet of the Turtleoids” entries, that special being moved up to the start of this season and airing two weeks before “My Brother the Bad Guy” must have watered down the shock value of the Technodrome’s relocation, sadly.)

The explorations of Shredder’s family tree began with the Francis Moss / Ted Pedersen collaboration “Shredder’s Mom” last season, and continue here. While that episode suggested that Shredder’s evil nature was an inherited trait, in theory at least the viewers are supposed to accept Kazuo as a good guy. In execution, however, he comes across as an insufferable, uptight blow-hard. His insistence on adhering to the rules actually hampers the Turtles in making any progress, and when he finally confronts his brother at the climax of this episode it’s clear how much more charismatic and likable Shredder is. If this was the genuinely threatening season one version of the character things would be different, but it’s hard to root against Shreds at this point in the show’s run when he’s an entirely ineffectual goofball who’s provided us with so much entertainment through the years.

With season five and the next phase of the Turtles/Foot storyline now underway, we settle back into a groove of Saturday morning double bills for the rest of 1991. While “My Brother the Bad Guy” manages to expand upon the backstory of the Shredder, the next episode - “Michelangelo Meets Mondo Gecko” - will try to do the same for the Turtles.

[impalementation]

spike, angel, buffy & romanticism: part 3

part 1: “When you kiss me I want to die”: Angel and the high school seasons

part 2: “Love isn’t brains, children”: Enter Spike as the id

* 

“Something effulgent”: Season five and the construction of Spike the romantic

Prior to becoming a romantic interest, Spike is everything I discussed in the last section. He is an id and a mirror for Buffy, he’s prone to both romantic exaggeration and cutting realism, and his liminality suggests ambiguity. But outside of “Lovers Walk”, the writing doesn’t actually delve too deeply into Spike’s nature as a romantic. If you stopped the canon at “Restless”, you’d probably think that Spike’s love for Drusilla was intriguing, but that the show hadn’t really gone anywhere with the implications of it, and for all you knew, that might not be an important part of his character anymore. So one of the most interesting things about season five to me, is that in this season in which the writers first consciously, deliberately decide to explore the sexual and romantic tension between Spike and Buffy, they also emphasize Spike’s romanticism more than ever. The choice to define Spike by his romanticism is a choice that follows naturally from everything established about his character, but it was also not an inevitable choice. Therefore, it’s a choice worth looking at in some detail.

Consider everything that “Fool For Love” establishes about Spike, especially the things that contradict what was supposedly canon at the time. It makes Drusilla his sire instead of Angel, meaning that he is sired by a romantic connection, and as a direct result of heartbreak. It makes him a poet living in the middle of the Victorian era, an age at odds with his previous ages of “barely 200” and “126”. Meaning that the writing specifically decides to ignore its canon in order to associate him with an era in which passions would have been repressed (rather than the Romantic era of the early 1800’s or the modern energy of the early 1900’s). Moreover, the episode reveals his entire aesthetic and personality to essentially be a construct. But most tellingly of all, it reveals him to be an idealist. Spike is not just a performance artist; he yearns for the “effulgent”, for something “glowing and glistening” that the “vulgarians” of the world don’t understand. In other words, he yearns for something bigger and more beautiful than life: something romantic. Later, he chases after “death, glory, and sod all else.” Spike may be a “fool for love”, who has a romantic view of romantic love specifically, but the episode is very clear about the fact that he is also a romantic more generally. When Drusilla turns him, she doesn’t tempt him by telling him she’ll love him forever. She tempts him by offering him “something…effulgent”. (Which, in typical Spike form, the episode immediately undercuts by having him say “ow” instead of swooning romantically). The fact that “Fool For Love”, Spike’s major backstory episode, is so determined to paint him as a romantic--and in particular, a disappointed, frustrated romantic--that it is willing to contradict canon to do so, tells you that this choice was important for framing Spike and his new, ongoing thematic role.

I’ve talked in the past about how season five is all about the tension between the mythical and the mortal--between big, grand, sweeping narratives, and the reality of being human. Buffy is the Slayer, but she’s also just a girl who loses her mother. Dawn is the key, but she’s also just a confused and hormonal fourteen-year-old. Willow is a powerful witch, but she also just wants her girlfriend to be okay. Glory is a god, but she’s also a human man named Ben, and finds herself increasingly weakened by his emotions. And Spike embodies this tension perfectly. He’s a soulless vampire with a lifetime of bloodshed behind him, but he’s also this silly, human man who wants to love and be loved. He wants big, grand things, but every time they are frustrated by a Victorian society, a rejection, a chip, a pratfall, or dying with an “ow”. Furthermore, his season five storyline is all about the tension between loving in an exalted, yet often selfish way, versus loving in a “real” or selfless way. 

There was a fascinating piece a ways back that discussed how Spike’s attempts to woo Buffy in season five almost perfectly match the romantic narratives of Courtly Love. In the words of the author:

The term "Courtly Love" is used to describe a certain kind of relationship common in romantic medieval literature. The Knight/Lover finds himself desperately and piteously enamored of a divinely beautiful but unobtainable woman. After a period of distressed introspection, he offers himself as her faithful servant and goes forth to perform brave deeds in her honor. His desire to impress her and to be found worthy of her gradually transforms and ennobles him; his sufferings -- inner turmoil, doubts as to the lady's care of him, as well as physical travails -- ultimately lends him wisdom, patience, and virtue and his acts themselves worldly renown.

You can see for yourself how well that description fits Spike’s arc. He fixates on the torturous, abject nature of his love, and has it in his head that he can perform deeds and demonstrate virtue, and this will prove to Buffy that he is worthy of her. But despite Spike’s gradual ennobling over the course of the season, I think it would be a mistake to see the season as using the Courtly Love narrative uncritically, or even just ironically. The same way it would be a mistake to see season two as using the Gothic uncritically. Spike is as much Don Quixote as he is Lancelot. He is a character that deliberately tries to act out romantic tropes, giving the writing an opportunity to satirize those tropes, including the tropes of chivalric romance. In particular, the writing criticizes Spike’s (very chivalric) fixation on love as a personal agony, something that is more about pain--and specifically, his pain--than building a real relationship. Over and over in season five, he is forced to abandon these sorts of flattering romantic mindsets in favor of a more complicated reality. 

So at first, Spike’s “deeds” tend to be shallow and vaguely transactional. He tries to help Buffy in “Checkpoint” even though she doesn’t want it (and insults her when she doesn’t appreciate it), he asks “what the hell does it take?” when Buffy is unimpressed by him not feeding on “bleeding disaster victims” in “Triangle”, he rants bitterly at a mannequin when Buffy fails to be grateful to him for taking her to Riley in “Into the Woods”, and he is angry and confused when Buffy is unmoved by his offer to stake Drusilla in “Crush”. While these attempts to symbolically reject his evilness are startling for a soulless vampire, and although Spike certainly feels like he is fundamentally altering himself for Buffy’s sake, none of it is based on understanding or supporting Buffy in a way that she would actually find substantial. Moreover, he lashes out when his gestures fail to win her attention or affection. He has an idea in his head of how their romantic scenes should play out, and reacts petulantly when reality fails to live up to it. 

But these incidents of self-interested narrativizing are also continuously contrasted with scenes in which Spike reacts with real generosity, or is surprised when he realizes he’s touched something emotionally genuine. When Buffy seeks him out in “Checkpoint”, his mannerisms instantly change when he realizes she actually needs real help (“You’re the only one strong enough to protect them”), rather than the performed help he offered at the beginning of the episode. At the end of “Fool For Love” he’s struck dumb by Buffy’s grief, and his antagonistic posturing all evening melts away. He abandons his romantic vision of their erotic, life-and-death rivalry in favor of real, awkward emotional intimacy. In “Forever” he tries to anonymously leave flowers for Joyce, and reacts angrily when he’s denied—but this time not because he wanted something from Buffy. Simply because he wanted to do something meaningful. 

This contradictory behavior comes to a head in “Intervention”, the episode in which Spike finally begins to understand the difference between real and transactional generosity. Up until that point, Spike has been reacting both selfishly and unselfishly, but he hasn’t been able to truly distinguish between them, which is why he keeps repeating the same mistakes. Although he touches something real at the end of “Fool For Love”, for instance, he goes on to rifle through Buffy’s intimates in the very next episode. And so “Intervention” has Spike go to extremes of fakeness and reality. He gives up on having the real Buffy, and seeks out an artificial substitute that lets him live out his cheesiest romance novel scripts. It’s important that the Buffybot isn’t just a sexbot, even if he does have sex with her. She’s a bot he plays out romantic scenarios with the way he played them with Harmony in “Crush”, allowing him to almost literally live within a fiction. But then he “gives up” on having Buffy in a way that’s actually real, by offering up his life. He lets himself be tortured, and potentially killed, for no other reason than that to do otherwise would cause Buffy pain. The focus is on her pain, not his. For the first time, he acts like the Knight he’s been trying to be all along. He performs a grand, heroic deed that causes the object of his affection to see him in a different light, and even grant him a kiss. Yet ironically, as part of learning the difference between real and fake, he ceases to press for Buffy’s reciprocation. Through the end of season five, Spike continues to act the selfless Knight, assisting Buffy in her heroism without asking for anything in return. Which culminates in his declaration that he knows Buffy “will never love him”, even after he’s promised her the deed of protecting Dawn, and even though she allows a kind of intimacy by letting him back in her house. He proves that he sees those gestures for what they are, rather than in a transactional light. The irony of the way Spike fulfills the narrative of chivalric romance, is that his ennobling involves letting aspects of that narrative go. 

In a Courtly Love narrative, the object of the Knight’s affection is fundamentally pedestalized. The Knight himself might be flawed, but the woman he pines after is not. She is “divinely beautiful” and “unobtainable”, something above him and almost more than human. This is why it’s so comic that in Don Quixote, which was a direct satire of chivalric romance, Alonso Quixano’s “lady love” is a vulgar peasant farmgirl who has no idea who he is. (Think of the way Spike asks if Buffy is tough in “School Hard” or threatens to “take her apart” despite “how brilliant she is” in “The Initiative”, followed by scenes where Buffy is acting like the teenage girl she is. Or how Giles in “Checkpoint” says that Buffy has “acquired a remarkable focus” before cutting to Buffy yawning.). Although it’s true that Buffy is beautiful, and supernatural, and profoundly moral, she is also very human, and the writing is very concerned with that humanity. Season five in particular, as I’ve mentioned, is preoccupied with the duality of Buffy’s mythic and mortal nature. Thus it becomes significant that Buffy is assigned such a heightened role in Spike’s chivalric narrative. Just Spike is at once Lancelot and Don Quixote, Buffy is at once Achilles, Dulcinea, and a coming-of-age protagonist. 

And part of the “lesson” of Spike’s arc is for him to see both sides of the roles they embody. One of my favorite things about the scene in Buffy’s house in “The Gift” is how adroitly it conveys the dualities of both Buffy and Spike with simple, but poetic imagery and language. Buffy stands above Spike on her steps, conveying her elevated role, and Spike honors the way her heroic status has inspired him by physically looking up to her as he explains that he expects nothing from her. But by expecting nothing from her, and promising to protect her sister, he also honors the fact that she is a real person with no obligation to him, and a younger sister she cares about more than anything. He also honors his own duality by at once making Knightly promises, and acknowledging that he sees through his former delusions: “I know that I’m a monster, but you treat me like a man.” In “Fool For Love” he tried to acknowledge the same duality of realism and romance, by declaring to Cecily that “I know I’m a bad poet, but I’m a good man.” But at the time, he was an innocent, whose desire to be seen, and whose romantic avoidance of “dark, ugly things”, left him unprepared to understand how Cecily really saw him (similar to Spike’s insistence in “Crush” that what he and Buffy have “isn’t pretty, but it’s real” just before Buffy locks him out). Spike is a character defined simultaneously by continuous disillusionment and dogged aspiration, which is why he makes perfect sense as a character to embody a season torn between the pain of being human, and the wonder of the gift of love.

Fittingly, the season ends with Spike’s most devastating loss of innocence of all. He fails to be the hero for Buffy or Dawn (note that Knightly language he uses on the tower: “I made a promise to a lady”), and he loses the woman he loves. He may have become more virtuous, but unlike in a chivalric romance, that virtue wins him neither Buffy, nor something flattering like “world reknown.” The climax of the “The Gift” is full of romance—a god, a troll hammer, a damsel on a tower, a heroic self-sacrifice, a vampire transformed into a Knight—but the end result is that Buffy is dead, in part because he wasn’t good enough, and all that he and the Scoobies can do is grieve. Stories got Spike nothing, even when reality finally lived up to them. It is a swan song to the myths of childhood, and on the other side of Glory’s portal, Spike and the other characters will have to confront a world where those myths have been left behind.

part 4: “But I can’t fool myself. Or Spike, for some reason.”: Buffy and Spike as a blended self

[watcher0033]

A What If idea-

Just a slight ep 5 canon-divergence but somewhat canon-compliant in the end.

What if... Riley interacted with someone else before going to Erin's.

What if he bumped into Ali? And he told him to go. To take his Dad and run. But the kid took it the wrong way and said that they're not going anywhere.

And Riley quietly took that in and turned to walk away. His lonesome form mildly silhouetted by the street lights his eyes were visibly... different.

Freaked out by the whole encounter, Ali came home to where the Sheriff treated his injured hand (kid's got a small cut he waved around that really tested Riley's control) and asked if eyes could change if someone glared enough. And we get Hassan's first "wtf" face.

Ali recounted the encounter and how off the man was ("He told us to run"), and once the sheriff knew it was Riley and his probable state of mind he went out to search for him.

Hesitant about approaching the Flynns first he went to approach Erin. But she wasn't there already. And reluctantly went to the Flynn's where they confirmed Riley's MIA for a while

(Most likely did not reveal that Erin filed a missing report).

The next day he decided to try again and was just on time to hear Erin delivering the news. He took her just as Mrs. Flynn shoved her away and brought her to Dr. Gunning's house.

The whole story came out and the blood combustion is demonstrated, resulting to the Sheriff's more profound "WTF" moment.

They decided Project Runaway is a go, and it's more or less canon with the added subplot of Hassan taking his kid out of school under the discerning and malicious eyes of Hellspawn Bev.

Unhappy, and bewildered on why he's being taken away. Ali shoved his Bible in his bag and reluctantly followed his dad to the port? Harbor? Just on time to witness the shadiness of Sturge.

Project Runaway failed and everyone's reluctantly revamped (lol) to Vampire Slayers status- in which the story comes out again and Ali Freaks Out.

Not wanting his friends to be undead, he made a speech of saving this island's godforsaken peeps because they don't deserve such a fate (this op grudgingly agrees and I'm so proud of the Ali in my head)

Hassan is heartbroken, and so, so proud of this boy he and his wife raised. (I pictured the whole interaction, know what emotions to put but now words their so hard rip) And the holy trinity of girl bosses approve.

The Sheriff brings out the fucking gun. "Make every bullet count," he said. (Coz it's the only one he has, and it wasn't even supposed to be used and his Life Story comes out here.) And this wasn't said in-canon but they mostly did, didn't they?

Before midnight mass-- Erin and Hassan bonding because it's clear at this point that they're in desperate need of grief counseling so they bonded over that and I need these two legends to be friends yo.

Oh, right. Ali tried to tell his friends but that curly jerkhead kid was messing him up and Bev entered here. So he was forced to pretend everything's fine. He's still gung-ho about entering their church and admitted that he and his dad will attend mass that evening. Bev approves but her disdain shows and is, as usual, a condescending arse.

More or less canon except for the part where Hassan freaked out coz he more or less saw it coming but he's "wtf" expression is on again. But this time so is everybody elses.

He still shot Angel first before being forcibly restrained like canon, and everyone in the Slayers squad got their turn with an added bonus where Ali got his shot too trying to save his friends and was mauled over as a result but not before tossing it back to the squad as they looked on horrified and the Sheriff made that scream that Leeza Scarborough did not ever want to hear again.

And the rest is as told.

(Mostly just wanted to have more Sheriff and his son's scenes)

(With an added bonus of me reimagining Erin Greene in Van Helsing's 2004 outfit as she shot Bev Keane to death.)

[samwontshare]

Pairing: Sam x Riley

Rating: PG

For @samwilsonfest hosting Samtember 2021

“Ri, this is the fifth time,” Sam huffed, holding up a rose tucked into his EXO-7 jet pack. It was mid-February, and they were stateside to demonstrate the suits for some brass. The days were long and… bureaucratic. Sam was chafing under the regulations. He ached for the chaos of the work, life and death always so damn close, there was no time to think or feel—you only had to fly. He got more antsy by the day, practically bowling down Riley to leave stale conference rooms. He wanted to move and fast.

Then small tokens appeared in his locker. A small bottle of orange juice. A bird magazine. A Dodgers shirt. A box of tea. He tucked them away in his duffle, juice aside, and examined them when sleep refused his attentions. His restlessness eased.

Riley only shrugged. “So you’ve got a secret admirer. Why are you doing your suspicious face?”

His what now? Sam shook his head, held up a finger to set him straight. “Suspicious face? I know you’re not calling me out like that. You aren’t Sarah.”

“Yup, there it is,” Riley mused, dopey grin and messy bangs in his eyes. “Sam fucking Wilson looking for a fight instead of taking the win.”

Sam clicked his tongue and looked at him sideways. “Only twenty people on this base know what these suits are. Fewer had access.”

“Oh, okay,” Riley mocked, arms crossed and he gained a smug smirk that Sam would swallow his wallet to lick off. “Instead of accepting a compliment, it’s now a matter of military security?”

He gave a short nod. “Let’s go.”

Riley rolled his eyes and followed him anyway.

Sam must’ve added three miles in pacing while they sorted the comings and goings of staff. Sam chatted up every officer and suit with half a whiff of the EXO-7 program. A casual question about the morning’s business here, a flirtatious inquiry there. Riley was at his heels the whole time, progressively loud sighs of protest in his ear. Just as Sam was about to suggest chatting up a four star general, Riley grabbed his arm. “It’s been an hour, Sam. Will you let it go?”

Sam tilted his head and considered, small smile tugging at his lips. “You gonna go first?”

Riley’s face flashed into confusion and melted into realization before that little vein in his forehead started to dance a beat. “Really? You petty man. How long did you know?”

“Riley, you bought everything from the commissary. It wasn’t exactly subtle. A Dodgers shirt, man?”

He snorted, “You try finding an Astros shirt on a desert base in Barstow. So… what now?”

Sam ducked his head, dove his hands into his pockets, and thought of his duffle full of trinkets that let him sleep at night. He turned on his heel. “Now… that’s my secret.”

“You’re a petty man!” Riley shouted loudly at his back as Sam hummed to himself, slow and easy.

[rapeculturerealities]

I would turn this world inside out for Black women. I would kill god for Black trans and nonbinary folks—the genderqueer, the gender subversive, the gender expansive, the gender transcendent. I would break every part of myself if it meant that the rest of you could be free.

I read about Oluwatoyin Salau. I bear witness to her assaults and I think about how a Black woman is murdered by a Black man every 21 hours, and how Black trans women keep being found dead and accused of deception for being true to themselves. I watch as #SayHerName is intentionally erased and Black men again falsely force themselves to the center of this movement, and as #BlackTransLivesMatter is denounced, pushed aside, and declared unnecessary.

I listen as Boots Riley dismisses and gaslights Noname and talks in circles when she says that the rest of us are too often forgotten about, refusing to hear her words because they are uncomfortable for him to sit in. He demonstrates the familiar way these conversations often go—Black men, even and especially the “radical” ones, stonewall and obfuscate at the mere suggestion that there is room for them to grow. We ask them to be better and they tell us no, in so many words.

read more

[dissonantdreamer]

Hey! This question will be in two bits because there isn’t many characters per submission: I wanted to pick your brains about the final conversation between Joel and Ellie before he dies, in which she says, "I was supposed to die in that hospital. My life would have fucking mattered. But you took that from me." MY response to this was always an empathetic one, in that she felt like, in a world in which each and every action feels insignificant, giving her life would have meant everything. (1/2)

Question Re: Joel & Ellie convo continued: A friend of mine played it recently, and didn't like it, stating that she came off as very “self-obsessed”. I think this is a valid reading based on the dialogue, but I was disappointed, I guess, at the lack of consideration! Although I wished ND had looked at the broader picture a little more, I would love to know what your interpretation is of it. Thank you for your time. X (2/2) 

I can understand and see why, to some people, Ellie’s behavior can seem self obsessed, but this is a person stripped of her agency in a world that is devastatingly lonely and I don't think your friend’s interpretation is “wrong”, and I'm sure mine is less than impartial and by any means “right”. I've been putting myself in her mental space for months now but I’m not one of the people that brought her to life. I'm sure there are many more unbiased opinions that are far better articulated out there.

I'm just a person with a blog and thoughts and a lot of free time thanks to a global pandemic to think them. In the end its up to individuals to ascribe their own meaning to the media they consume.

Under the cut is mine.

The Last of Us Part II frames Ellie’s journey to “find and kill every last one of them” as that of an addict. We watch as the girl we know and love from Part I become consumed by this need to avenge Joel’s death to make his passing matter. That spiral, of life mattering in world that does not care about you, didn’t start with Joel’s death, her need to have her life matter (after being told at the age of 14 that she was humanity’s key to a vaccine) started when Riley turned and she didn’t. To get to that point on the porch you have to look at Ellie’s history of trauma.

Surviving a life or death situation is brutal, you have moments when you feel happy and suddenly your laughter turns to overwhelming guilt and pain because you’re still alive and that person or group of people aren’t and in your mind it becomes and it should have been me cycle. Over and over. You can push your survivor’s guilt aside for a time, but it always comes back. Imagine going through that, and then to weeks later being told that your immunity means something you mean something. Now Ellie has a reason to make the loss of Riley’s life worth something. Her death and Ellie’s continued living isn’t for nothing.

Through Part I we follow Ellie and Joel as they fight and lose so many people whom Ellie forms quick bonds with. Tess, Sam, Henry, even her own mother died shortly after giving birth to her. She continues to live while everyone she cares about around her dies or leaves. You would probably feel a little bit at fault after this pattern repeats and repeats. Ellie has a way to make things right to have all that pain matter. To right what in her eyes, is a great injustice that others die while she lives.

Ellie changes after David, she’s had to kill someone she made a tenuous connection with to survive an encounter only to have him prove to her she was right to distrust him. Up until then she trusted people easier, wanted to help Sam and Henry when Joel would rather cast them aside. Joel is not there to distrust David and so she does and, his actions as well as some dialogue shows, he’s demonstrably evil. Joel is right to distrust others and that loss of trust in the world festers in her for a while. We see it in spades in Part II. 

Getting into Utah, Ellie isn’t herself. Shes distant, off. Joel has to pry answers and it’s only at the giraffe scene do we see a glimpse of who she was before. Even in that moment she wants to get the Firefly journey over no matter the cost. Joel wants to be selfish and go back to Jackson but she has to see it through. Because it can’t be for nothing. The loss of everyone weighs on her and she’s a kid. There is no one to help her process her trauma. Joel for all his love is a broken, imperfect man, trying to do right by himself after failing his own daughter.

The choice to sacrifice herself is one she wanted to make, but she nearly drowns and instead of waiting (I mean, really y’all waited 20 years you could  wait a week for the kid jesus) she loses the one choice that she had left. The one choice she could make. She wakes up on the way to Jackson, everyone she’s cared about is still dead and now, there is no cure. That alone is devastating enough. She’s in a community of people she can’t tell anyone about her immunity, that’s isolating. We see how hard it’s been for her through the reveal of her immunity with Dina, both in the weed den in the theater.

Years pass and this thought that the person you trust more than anyone else lied to you eats away at the back of your mind. She can’t escape that guilt either, not trusting someone who risked his life for her the way Joel did, but he dismisses her questions, acts defensive when there are two bodies that her cure could have prevented lying at their feet. Finding out the truth? That not only Joel lied, but that in trying to “save her” he killed the only person who could make a vaccine? Not only would her death have meant something, in doing so she could have prevented more death, but now no one is saved. No one lives, except her. And she can’t get infected.

In Utah she finds out the truth from a recording. Not the man she’s trusted. She then has to force Joel to tell her the truth, threatens to leave him and Jackson and the life he had for her to get him to do so. Because to have something so monumental to your personal redemption stripped away like that by the one person who cared enough to stay? That’ll fuck anyone up.

That moment on the porch is a culmination of all that, with the added pain of having lost Joel, emotionally, as someone she could trust over a short period of time. Joel stood up to Seth for her and Dina, but in her eyes, she had control of the situation and Joel took it from her. She can’t fix the world, but she has one choice she is in control of in this moment. She can choose to try and forgive Joel. She can choose to give him a second chance.

Maybe that is self-obsessed to some. Maybe to others its a Joel’s actions are a more egregious motivation of selfishness to save one life when he couldn’t save Sarah’s. To Ellie her life doesn’t matter, but to everyone who has ever cared for her, ever loved her, it does.

That’s the thing with humans, we don’t matter in the grand scheme of the universe. We’re less than a blip trying to be a wave in an ocean more vast and deep than we can ever comprehend. To everyone around us in our individual lives however, we’re capable of being a wave in a puddle at times. We don’t always know that though. People are wired to believe they don’t matter to others as much as those people matter to them. That’s why sometimes dying on a slab seems like the best option.

But I think how varied, and divisive, the response to Ellie and this story has been stands to show one of the points of the game: You can't fully understand what others are going through. You only see what you want to see on the surface until you know their struggles. And then knowing what you know, ask yourself if you could forgive them. There is no true right and wrong, bad or good, under circumstance. Our continued sense of humanity is a morally gray fog we have to navigate each and every day and hope that when the fog clears enough for us to move forward we can see there is something better out there to fight for.

[harmonyandriley]

House Of Fun.

Just have to add yesterday in parliament was brilliant a spineless coward Keir Starmer droning on about someone else when he backed anti-Semitism leader Jeremy Corbyn.

He would of had no vaccine solution for the pandemic and the world will know in time he fucked up in a massive way as director of public prosecutions.

Great to see Boris Johnson now say in front of the world that Keir Starmer and the Labour party attack democracy they are enemies of the western democratic world and a threat to freedom.

Keir Starmer has no authority in the world every leader of a nation already has Keir Starmer noted as a fraud and a potential weak link in global matters.

Keir Starmer can drone on with a domestic agenda but he has zero international credibility.

Great to hear the Labour front bench involved with Jimmy Savile protecting sex offenders is a favourite pastime of the left the BBC was one of his greatest fans so woke so weirdo.

The Great British people are getting the message out to global media and politics that every democracy in the world is being attacked by the Labour party.

Great to see Ian Blackford incapable of even interpreting basic protocol and he is the best representative the Scottish Narcotics Party can provide.

Whilst the Prime Minister Boris Johnson is engaging with matters Ian Blackford gets thrown out of parliament to stand in the naughty corner.

Mark Rapespawn Drakeford is advocating the notion that individual freedom is far from important in his Socialist Labour Wales this is perfectly demonstrated by his son Jonathan who raped a defenceless Welsh lady as a way of expressing his father's socialist terrorist philosophy.

Jonathan wants to say something from his prison cell to the victim of his socialist ideology...

Your individual human freedom to not let me rape you is incompatible with the greater good of our socialist nation so you are being raped today.

Love from the Drakeford family of Wales.

Harmony & Riley Potential Realised has truly livened up parliament and it's just the beginning.

Just as the Labour party politics are preparing for an election the Metropolitan Police corruption will be involved in an IOPC investigation regarding the arranged theft of Great British children linked to a very corrupted barrister named Keir Starmer.

In some woke left wing news papers they say even our school children are laughing at Boris Johnson.

Yes when they get a break from being sexually abused by Asian peodophile gangs protected by the left wing media the police corruption and the Labour party politics that creates a factory scale national child abuse horror.

Keir Starmer can't even accept responsibility for the actions of the Crown Prosecution Service failures that assisted the paedophile Jimmy Savile when he was the oh so brilliant Director Of Public Prosecutions.

The mask is slipping away.

The British Medical Association also known as the Bored Moronic Asian association claims 75% of doctors have experienced racism.

White girls arriving for mental health check ups claimed the doctors were too arrogant and rude and incompetent and backward and woke to bother turning up to deal with the child sexual abuse committed against them by 100% Asian child grooming gangs.

The BMA responded by releasing a statement via Emily Maitliss @ BBC Newsnight stating oh shut up you racist white witches and get in the car with the nice Asian doctor he will take you to the woods and teach you some fucking respect you white pieces of shit.

At least Boris Johnson gives children something to laugh about instead of the Gaurdian newspaper the Daily Mirror newspaper and the BBC news and Sky news teams and the Labour party socialist party politics simply giving children something to be gang raped murdered and beaten senseless about.

And to cover it up to talk about parties and birthday cake in Downing Street.

It's a shame those innocent little children get no birthday party no presents and no cake.

For their birthdays they get raped killed beaten poverty no family no friends and no future.

That's a socialist birthday party for our children.

The Labour Child Terrorist Party.

Disgusting Socialism.

Mark Anthony Ward @ Harmony & Riley Potential Realised.

[bbrandy2002]

My Love

Chapter Nine

Pairing: Liam x Riley

Book: TRH

A/N: Thanks @burnsoslow for the late-night beta read and for making me believe a lion was going pop out of my phone (I'm still astounded by how gullible I am, but the conversation was hilarious).

A/N/N: Using a prompt I was given by @pedudley​ that she requested for Liam and Maxwell: “What are you doing?” “Hiding”

THANK YOU for all of your continued messages about this story!!! 

"And I always will, my love," Liam whispered under his breath as he lowered the gun to his side. He squinted in astonishment and took a half-step back. 

He knew. 

He could feel it.

And -- in a way that mystified even himself -- he could see it.

A sudden wave of realization crashed over him that nearly dropped him to his knees. 

"Riley?" he questioned through a shaky breath, his focus on her never faltering.

Riley remained still. Quiet. Resolute. Inside, she fought the urge to speak or touch him while she searched his curious eyes. She had to allow Liam's mind a chance to catch up with his heart. It was evident by the staggered look on his face; it was, as expected, going to take some time to process his feelings, his thoughts, and the overwhelming need to understand what this was.

She followed his staggered gaze as it traveled down the full length of her body before settling back on her face again.

"Is it … it’s really you?"

Riley nodded slowly. Her eyes became glassy under a shroud of hope and anticipation she had longed for since returning. "It's really me," her voice cracked.

Liam's face softened, and his own eyes began to well up and trickle like streams down to his quivering chin. The pieces of his heart that had been shattered six weeks ago in a cold hospital room, were being mended back together one at a time. Those tiny remnants that had left him feeling lost, lonely, and broken, were in one single moment, complete, and now beating with a warmth he had long forgotten. His strength always came from her, and now she stood in his presence.

Liam was whole again.

"H-How?" he stammered. "I saw you. I held you in my arms. You … you died."

"I know." She answered him through her silent cry. "But … my Liam needed me."

He shook his head, still stuck between disbelief and an all-consuming desire to feel her. "I've always needed you, Ri," his voice laced with emotion.

The couple stared at one another. That same magnetic force that drew them together in a dimly-lit New York bar had resurfaced. In Liam's mind, he couldn't explain what was taking place. The Riley he once knew wasn't there, but somehow, someway, the most essential part of her was. 

Everything she told him in the hospital came flooding back. All the memories she knew. How she had repeatedly insisted Amanda was dead, and that she came back to him through her. How she had heard him cry out for her moments before he broke down -- a time in which Amanda was known to have been attacked in the park. None of it really made any sense, but in some strange way, everything did. 

His hand trembled as it reached for her cheek, stopping just shy of her face. Riley smiled then pressed the side of her head into his palm; her hands cupped over him while she savored the feeling and tenderness of his touch.

Liam smiled back at her then realized he still had the gun in his other hand -- the one he almost killed her with.

"Oh, God! I'm sorry. I didn't mean to --" He didn't take his eyes off of her as he scrambled to place the pistol on the table. 

Riley laughed softly and rubbed his upper arm. “Liam, it’s okay.”

He continued to search her eyes. "Can … can I hold you?" He asked through a pleading whimper.

She nodded affirmatively. Her thumb grazed at the corner of his eye to catch a lingering tear. "I would like that."

Liam's free hand reached around her waist as the other one that was cupping her cheek traveled down the length of her arm before winding through it and resting on her lower back. He bit his bottom lip and pulled her closer to him until she was firmly pressed against him. Riley obviously looked and felt different; those subtle curves he remembered were now smoother. Her complexion was lighter, and her hair not as dark. The alluring smile that had captivated him from the beginning was no longer there. 

The way her features lit up whenever she looked at him, however, was exactly the same. She had love written across her face and in her eyes. She was every bit as beautiful and stunning as the vision of her he recalled in his head. Liam never saw that in Amanda, yet, it was all there now.

This was Riley Brooks. 

This was his love.

With his arms wound tightly around her waist, Riley encircled her own around his neck. Liam lowered his head towards hers, hesitating at first, before parting his lips as he inched closer to her. She moistened her lips and closed the distance between them. With her fingers twined through his wavy, blonde hair, they kissed with a tenderness and passion that gradually became more desperate. It was weeks of raw, painful emotions that all came to a head and were now set free through this physical demonstration of their yearning affections.  His hands shifted from her waist and cupped the sides of her neck with his thumbs resting along her jawline before reluctantly parting. 

Liam rested his forehead on Riley’s, donning an enchanted smile. “I missed you so much, love," he breathed.

"I missed you too." 

For the next several minutes, they embraced one another, savoring the sensation of the other's touch. Fingers laced. Hands roamed. Tongues swept across the other. Eyes gazed longingly.

Liam was afraid to let go of her out of fear; it would all turn out to be a dream. He was sure the instant he let go of Riley, she would disappear, and couldn't bring himself to take that chance -- not after everything he had been through. He lifted her up and spun her around, and the sound of her laughter made him feel more carefree and spirited than he had in a long time. “How is all of this possible?”

Riley chuckled. “Let’s just say, never underestimate the power of your mother. Eleanor knows the right people to talk to so she can get what she wants. She definitely has a way of seeing to it that her baby boy is taken care of … she’s so proud of you, Liam.”

Liam sucked in his lips and closed his eyes. “You talked to --” he paused briefly, “that’s how you knew about my elbow?”

“Yes,” Riley answered with a mischievous grin.”I know so much more about your childhood. You weren’t always as innocent as you like to let on,” she laughed.

Liam rubbed the back of his neck, his eyes darting to the heavens. “Thank you, Mother,” he said wryly.

He held onto her gentle hand as he pulled out the chair Bastien had sat in before exiting and lowered her down onto his lap. Riley noticed the pale color of Liam’s face and poured him a glass of water that was sitting on the table. “You look like you could use this.” She handed the glass to him.

Liam took a few sips then placed the water back on the table. “Thank you. It’s not every day your late wife comes back from the afterlife in the form of her …  killer.” He pinched the middle of his shaking forehead with a slight chuckle. “You’ve always done things that surprised me, Riley, but this … this is a new one. I don’t even know how the hell I’m going to get you out of this.”

Riley feigned a pouty look then laughed playfully. She wanted to tell him the stipulations, that this wasn’t something permanent. She would have to return. Riley Brooks died weeks ago, and that was a fact that would never change. This was only a temporary solution. It was the sheer look of peace designed into every facet and form of his face and the sound of contentment in his voice, that made her decide that it would be best to wait. There was so much to do in such a short time, and she had to make sure Liam would be prepared for it. She wanted him to at least have this moment.

Liam had so many questions, and Riley answered them as best as she could. How do you explain a phenomenon such as this? Much to her surprise, and most certainly also to himself, he was willing to accept it. He had always trusted his gut instincts when it came to her, and this time was no different. She was the love of his life with the face of her killer, and yet for reasons that he couldn’t explain, he knew this was real. Liam knew Riley better than anyone else, and even with his years of training in body language and presentation, he wasn’t sure he could have portrayed his wife as well as the woman before him. 

After they kissed once more, Liam was eager to take her home, and she wanted more than anything to hold Ellie again. There were still a lot of unanswered questions and so many things to discuss with one another, but they would need to wait.  For now, there was only one logical option: She would continue to be known as Amanda Talbert to the world, and Liam and their closest friends would be the only ones who really knew who she was. 

Riley straightened Liam’s buttoned-up shirt and fixed his collar, more so out of habit than necessity, and followed behind him. With one last glance, they walked out of the interrogation room.

Bastien was sitting in a chair just outside of the room. When the door opened, he looked up surprised but overly relieved the King had decided against killing the prisoner. He stood to reach for Riley’s arm to escort her back to her cell. Liam lightly pushed Bastien’s arm away and looked back at Riley. He cleared his throat and shared with his head guard that “Miss Talbert” was innocent and would be returning with him back to his quarters as Ellie’s nanny. It was a difficult statement to make. He still wanted Amanda to pay for what she had done to Riley, but he would have to be satisfied that someone had taken liberties in their own demented way, of doing that already.

Bastien was at a loss for words. “Sir, but what about the evidence? This woman killed your wife. Our Queen.” 

Liam clapped him on the shoulder and held his grip tightly there. “I have made my decision, and you will respect my order. The evidence against her is to be shared with no one. Do I make myself clear?”

Bastien’s mouth fell, not sure how to respond. 

“Bastien! Are we clear?”

“Uhm.”’ He stammered for words before responding. “Yes, sir.”

Liam clapped his shoulder once more with a grin. “Thank you, Bastien.”

------------

Riley followed a respectful distance behind Liam to not garner attention until they returned to their quarters. Once the door had shut behind them, both stopped in their tracks when they noticed Maxwell hunched down next to a column in the foyer.

Liam quirked his brow. “Maxwell. What are you doing?”

“Hiding,” he replied in a hushed tone. “I hid the key to the liquor cabinet, and Drake is trying to kill me for it. He’s fiending real, real bad, Liam. I think it’s time we stage an intervention before we lose him to the hooch.”

“I don’t need a damn intervention, Maxwell!’ Drake interrupted as he popped around the corner with Ellie in his arms. His attention suddenly shifted when he noticed Riley standing beside Liam. His head motioned to her. “What the hell is she doing here?” he glowered.

Maxwell sprung to his feet with a giant smile and a wave. “Hey, Blossom!”

Riley chuckled. “Hey, Max.”

Liam took a lively Ellie from Drake, kissed the top of her head, and stood before Riley. “Are you ready for her?”

To Riley, it had felt like a lifetime since she saw her little girl. She was so overcome with emotions from seeing this beautiful creature again, she couldn’t answer him. She nodded and held out her arms as Liam placed Ellie in them.

Her 12-week old daughter didn’t know it, but the large smile she gave her -- one she had never seen before -- melted her heart. With Liam’s arms wrapped around both of them, their family was complete again.

Drake had wanted to believe her in the hospital that day, yet couldn’t allow his heart or the rational portion of his mind to go there. He shook his head in amazement when it all became real to him. “Welcome back, Brooks.” 

Riley smiled back at him with a grateful look. “Thank you, Drake.”

Drake turned to Maxwell and grabbed his shirt collar. “Now, where’s that fucking key at, Beaumont?”

It was clearer during their brief reunion, as they reminisced over old times and inside jokes that she was exactly who she claimed to be.

As much as both of them wanted to stay, having their own lists of questions, Drake and Maxwell knew that Liam, Riley, and Ellie needed their own personal time together. Before leaving, they understood this was something that needed to be kept between the four of them for now. Not only because of the complexity of the situation but also for Riley’s safety. It was well known by now among them that Amanda was related to Amalas and that it was highly probable that her attack was in some way related to her Auvernal connection. 

That evening, after putting Ellie to bed, Riley stood at the rails of the balcony just off their bedroom, with her arms crossed tightly over her chest. Occasionally rubbing at the goosebumps that sprouted from the chill of the breeze that lingered, she glanced towards the small monument that sat under the apple tree by the maze. It was the first time since returning that it really struck her -- she was gone. She was a soul that no longer existed in this life with the man she cherished and the child they shared together. At any time, and she wasn’t sure when she would have to return. She inhaled a deep breath and blew it out.  Shutting her eyes, she pondered how she would be able to leave them again. Riley came back because Liam needed her, but at what cost? 

Startled from her thoughts, she felt Liam’s arms come around her waist from behind and the press of his warm lips on her cheek. How badly had he missed her that he was so readily willing to accept who she now was? For life?

How much harder was it going to be on him when she left again?

Liam nuzzled into her neck, nipping along her shoulder. “Love, I was thinking.”

“Hmm,” she moaned into each nibble as his hands skidded lower and lower. “What’re you …  thinking about?” Her belly clenched.

“The social season. I would like to meet with Bertrand tomorrow and discuss plans for your sponsorship. I’m sure he would be more than happy to …  oblige my request.” His words trailed off with a smirk as he noticed her knuckles whitening from the tightened grip she had on the railing. He pressed himself into her backside, rubbing along the swell of her rounded ass.

Riley tried to focus on his words. He was making plans for a future with her,; a future they would never have together. She didn’t want to hurt him, but she needed to tell him as soon as possible. Putting off the inevitable truth would only break him more. 

A prying finger slipped between her legs and awakened the bundle of nerves where his thumb began to thrum. “Liam,” she groaned. “I have .. oh God … I have …  to tell you something.” She barely uttered those words as a dizzying haze of pressure intensified in her head. She felt her pajama bottoms being slid down, and the slightly wet towel he had draped around his waist, tangled at her feet.

“I have something to tell you also.” The heat of his guttural whisper on her ear sent a shiver down her spine. 

Riley’s head snapped back into his shoulder. “What?” she bellowed.

“Bend over Riley,” he commanded. 

The head of his dick sprang hungrily into the lower crevice of her ass and jabbed between the narrow opening of her dampened inner thighs. His free hand pushed Riley forward until her chest lay heaving on the cold marble of the balcony rail. 

Her legs began to quake and contract as he mounted himself behind her. A familiar rise of energy ignited deep in her stomach that became more intense and fierce. As the twitch of his fingers increased, she bit her lower lip and clamped down harder on the railing. Her core fluttered around his wet hand and trickled her essence like a fountain to the concrete below.

Before she had time to recover from her pleasure, Liam’s foot nudged her ankles apart.

“You will come again for your king, Riley.”

Before the words escaped entirely from his lips, he thrusts himself deep inside her. Her head lunged forward, and every muscle in her body constricted in sync with his feverish drives.

“Say it, Riley!” he ordered.

She wanted him to command her again. Her excitement level rose at the anticipation of his authoritative tone. 

Liam gripped both of her hips, his fingers pressed deep into her skin.

“I said, say it, Riley!” He drove even deeper.

Even though she tried hard to remain hushed, that thrust elicited a louder groan.

She could feel his shaft getting harder and thicker; he wouldn’t be able to hold on much longer. One of his hands that had been ground into her hips reached around desperately in search of her clit that was still sensitive and swollen.

One more time, she thought. Just one more time was all she needed to send them both completely over the edge. 

Riley’s knees buckled, and she could feel that burning sensation washing over her again. The smell of sex and roses lingered in the air around them.

The next push was so strong and deep, it felt like the center of her abdomen jostled against her diaphragm. Her toes curled as a fusion of pleasure and pain rippled in unison within her walls.

“I said, say it!”

With a jolt of electricity that shot from her core, she ultimately whimpered breathlessly. “I’m coming, my king!”

“Fuck!”

Instantly, a hot burst flooded within her as they released together, and his face burrowed into her back. His own cries were muffled by the still- bruised surface that covered the ridges of her spine and echoed through her bones.

They remained intoxicated with pleasure until the pulse she felt within her became slower and slower. 

A string of his seed detached and clung from him when he pulled out. “Oh my God, love!” He breathed. “That was …”

“Incredible,” she gushed. 

Liam pulled her to him and lifted her up bridal style. “Liam! What are you doing?” she laughed.

He kissed her temple as he kicked the balcony door open further with his foot.

“You,” he smirked. “Round two, my love.”

_____

Riley rubbed the sleep from her eyes, awakened by the sound of Ellie’s coos through the baby monitor. She could hear the shower running and knew Liam was already up.

She slipped on her robe with thoughts of telling Liam today. She needed to have that talk with him before he contacted Bertrand this morning. He had told her yesterday while talking with Drake and Maxwell about Neville’s impromptu council meeting over a week ago. Riley knew about the vote and that he would now have to find another wife to replace her. As much as that pained her to hear -- not for herself, but for Liam --, he needed to know the plan he was working on to include her as a suitor would not be possible.

After changing Ellie, she walked downstairs into the kitchen to prepare her bottle. She pulled her usual mug from the cabinet and began to pour her coffee when the doorbell rang. 

Riley lifted Ellie’s bouncer and made her way to the front door, setting the baby on the floor next to her as she answered the door. 

“Miss Talbert?” she was greeted. 

Riley furrowed her brows, recognizing the royal courier who held a large, white box in his hands. “Yes. I’m Amanda Talbert.”

After signing for the unmarked package, Riley set the box on the table next to the door and began vigorously pulling off the tape. “Let’s see if you had any more secrets, Amanda.”

A stench so foul and nauseating escaped as the four sides on top were opened one at a time. Riley arched back and placed a hand over her nose. She slowly peeked over the sides and saw a manila envelope on top of a black plastic bag.  Hesitating, she plucked the envelope out, unfastened the clasped, and retrieved the paper inside.

Her brown eyes grew wide, and her chest tightened with fear when she read its words. Trembling, she placed the paper on top of the envelope and tossed it on the table beside the box. With pinched fingers gripped to a folded over piece of the plastic, she slowly pulled it back. Her stomach lurched, and she stumbled backward, tripping over her own feet.

"LIAM!!!!"

[bisexualpirateheart]

31. “let me take care of you.”

"Abby. Abby."

Somewhere someone was just saying her name repeatedly and Abby couldn't understand why. It was the middle of the night and all she wanted to do was go back to sleep. She'd been dreaming a dream in which she'd been an ice skating instructor at the north pole who had to teach all of Santa's elves how to skate. She was pretty sure this dream was Harper's fault somehow, but she still wanted to do a good job of teaching the elves. Their skating display was supposed to be the highlight of Santa’s Christmas party.

"Abbbbbbby."

She turned over in bed and looked around sleepily in the dark. Harper was crouched on the foot of the bed, poking at her leg.

"Harper." Abby sat up. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong." Harper said a little too loudly.

Abby snorted. "Clearly you're drunk."

"Just a little." Harper made a gesture to demonstrate how not-drunk she was and fell off the bed.

"Shit are you okay?"

"Imfine." Harper sat up. "Hey, do you wanna go poke the presents under the tree and guess what they are?"

"Not really." Abby admitted. She was bad at guessing already wrapped things and besides, she didn’t really know what any of the family might have gotten each other as a gift and anything that might make a recognizable sound was probably expensive and therefore breakable.

It was too late Harper was already off up the stairs, leaving her shoes behind on the floor.

"Shit." Abby jumped out of bed and raced after her, trying to be as quiet as possible.

She was worried about the Christmas tree but fortunately when she reached the living room, she found Harper just sitting on the window seat looking out at the snow-covered yard.

As she drew closer, Abby saw that she'd been crying. Her heart turned over. She hated seeing Harper cry, Harper did it so rarely that every time Abby knew that something awful had happened.

"Hey." Abby said softly, sitting down beside her. "Are you okay?" She touched her knee gently. “Is something wrong?”

"No. And no." Harper sniffled. "Tonight was stupid and I was stupid...I should have left with you. I shouldn't have stayed longer with Connor." She hiccupped slightly.

Abby was quiet. Obviously, she agreed with that part, but Harper was clearly regretting it already so she didn't say anything. Abby didn't want to ask about Connor; she didn’t want to talk about Connor to be honest. She had been prepared for Riley because Harper had told her about Riley, but she hadn’t been prepared to deal with a tall ex-boyfriend who was clearly still into Harper in a very big way.

"I just..." Harper rubbed at her eyes. "I thought things could go on the way they were just for a little while longer, but all the mayor stuff seems like a bigger deal now that we're actually here and my dad wants it so much and my mom wants it for him and...I thought it would be okay."

Her voice got quieter and Abby had to strain to hear her. "I thought I could still be the me who was around them for a few days and it'd be fine, but I don't like that me anymore. I haven't in a long time and I didn't realize just how fucking hard," her voice cracks a little, coming out as a sob, "it would be to be here with you and not have things how they are at home. Our home."

"Shhh it’s okay. It's only a few more days" Abby told her, putting an arm around her. "It's not the end of the world." When she said aloud she knew it was true. They’d get through this and then Harper would tell her parents and they’d have to accept it one way or another. To be fair, Abby couldn’t imagine anyone not loving Harper but she knew that some parents were actually very hung up on the idea of their kids being straight and it could be a problem. She just hoped Harper’s parents wouldn’t be that bad once Harper told them.

"I know." Harper said dully, leaning her head against Abby's shoulder. "It's just stupid. I wish they were like your parents."

"Well," Abby said after a moment, "you realize if they were like my parents, they'd be, you know, dead."

Harper stared at her incredulously. "Abby."

"What, I was trying to lighten the mood."

Inexplicably Harper laughed. "You're ridiculous."

"And you're still drunk." Abby kissed her shoulder. "How about we go upstairs and get you some water, and go to bed, okay?"

"I will go anywhere with you,” Harper told her, putting her arms around her, "But especially to bed. and I'll do anything for you, but especially in bed."

"I know." Abby smiled at her, pulling her gently to her feet. "But for now let me take care of you okay?" "Okay."  Harper agreed. She leaned her head against Abby's as they went upstairs together. "I love you, you know that."

"I do." Abby told her. She did. She wouldn’t be here in this house trying so hard with a family who wasn’t even hers if she didn’t know how much Harper loved her.

"And I'd do anything for you."

"Tomorrow." Abby said firmly.

"Tomorrow." Harper nodded as she sat down heavily on the bed. "Tonight, I just wanna sleep."

"That's a very good plan." Abby nudged her to lie down. She got a glass of water from the bathroom and brought it into the bedroom. Harper already had her face buried in the pillow.

Abby smiled at her. she set the glass down on the bedside table and leaned down to kiss Harper. “Goodnight.” She started to go.

"No stay." Harper whispered.

Abby hesitated but Harper’s hand was on her wrist and she couldn’t leave her.

"Okay." Abby crawled in beside her and Harper immediately wrapped her arms around her, burying her face in Abby's t-shirt.

Abby stroked her hair, whispering softly to her until they both fell asleep. Tomorrow would take care of itself.