#and seduced by the power she holds to save him pieced in with scenes of her destroying worlds and loving terric thank you for listening to

[delighted-mirage]

ough rotating clementine “i’m alive” from next to normal musical reflecting her power and her humanity in a dance needing it and unable to change how it destroys herself and everything around her and then thinking about terric (of york) representing that power he’s alive he’s alive he is so alive he’s right behind her she says forget but he’ll remind her cause if she won’t grieve him she won’t leave him behind (she can never make it back to him).

[bloodyshadow1]

Beauyashaweek 2021 day 2 Classical Art: Birthed from Stone

Beauyashaweek 2021 day 2 Classical Painting Art

Technically, the prompt is Classical Painting, but I couldn't really think of anything to write for that so I decided to do Classical Art as the prompt and thought of this. There's more to it, but I decided to cut it short because it was getting too long and not ending. I hope you enjoy my story, if you do please leave a comment, they help more than you know.

It was Saturday, there were a million things Beau would have preferred to be doing on her Saturday, one of the few days off she had, than going to the Zadash Museum of Art. That wasn’t fair, she liked the Museum, she liked the artwork, but she hated that she was here on an assignment for school rather than because she wanted to which meant she hated the Museum currently.

Beau had only taken Art Appreciation 110 on her best friend Jester’s suggestion. The blue tiefling art major thought it would be fun to have her best friend in the class she was TAing and assured Beau that it was an easy class being a 100 level. Beau didn’t mind an easy A, she was a double major history and sports medicine in her senior year, she figured she might as well since the rest of her course load was killer.

Unfortunately, unlike most of the classes Beau had taken though her time at Z.U. Art Appreciation 110 wasn’t a blow off class that she could just take the tests and write papers to pass with an A. The teacher Mr. Artagan was more eccentric than most of the faculty at Z.U. full of new age ideas how to run his class. No tests at all and only a few papers, which would be fine for most people, but the fact that participation was worth 60% of her grade made the class a living hell for Beau. He thought that children (despite them all being college students) should be rewarded for showing initiative, not just memorizing facts, something that Beau relied on. She was a smart girl who read the assigned reading before the class had even started hoping it would mean she didn’t have to show up for class only to have Jester’s hippy mentor ruin that dream the first day.

Artagan, as he liked them to call him, no mister for him, was one of those ‘cool’ teachers who thought they were changing the world in their 100 level course that contained mostly freshmen trying to get their gen ed credits out of the way. The teacher who wore an actual green cloak to class everyday that clashed horribly with his tangle of reddish orange hair, but went well with his inhuman green eye, knew he was put on this earth to reach the kids. Beau hated him instantly and thought if not for his laziness, his biggest weakness other than a wicked case of ADHD that no amount of Adderall would fix, he would probably be a cult leader. Luckily for the class, Jester took her job as his TA seriously, or at least as serious as Jester could leading a class taught by Mr. Artagan about appreciating art, so she was at least a competent teacher when the actual teacher decided to take a nap in the middle of a lecture or jump out the window to chase a bird. She would call on Beau whenever she could because she knew her best friend at least knew the information even though she wouldn’t volunteer the information willingly. It saved Beau’s average from tanking in class, but by the time the semester came to a close it didn’t look good, Beau was sitting at a low C which again, wouldn’t be bad for most people in their blow off class, but was horrible for Beauregard Lionett, the disgraced daughter of the Lionett wine family in Kamordah.

Without getting into it, Beau’s relationship with her family, especially her dad Thoreau, was horrible to be kind. She was only at Z.U. due to both academic and athletic scholarships, and losing one would mean she wouldn’t have enough money for her final semester, and she needed at least a B in all her classes if she wanted to graduate. Technically she would still be able to graduate, but her diploma would remain as property of the school until her debts were paid up, which meant she couldn’t get a job with her diploma unless she lied on her resume. And while, no one could say Beauregard Lionett was against lying, she wasn’t a self destructive teenager anymore she knew it would only hurt her in the long run.

Luckily, having her best friend as her T.A. meant Jester begging Mr. Artagan to let Beau have some extra credit so she could pass. Artagan agreed and told her to write a paper on how a piece of art makes you feel. If Beau didn’t desperately need to pass this stupid class she would have thrown it in his face, but instead as a self destructive adult who at least was aware of her money problems, she gritted her teeth and took the extra credit assignment.

Beau had been to the museum at their school a bunch of times, she had given tours for a bit as a work study gig until the people in charge realized how bad she was with people. But there was something about being forced to go there for an assignment that soured the whole thing for her.

“Let's check out the Emon exhibit first Beau,” Jester said taking her and dragging her to the Tal’Dori section. Beau didn’t mind it, but there was too much…, cleanness in the artwork of their neighbors to the West. Tal’Dori was really similar to Wildemount in a lot of ways, without the whole equally large enemy neighbor country that you’ve been in a Cold War with forever. Emon had its own set of problems, but propaganda or not, whatever Beau read made the other continent sound like a less shitty version of the Dwendalian Empire.

Still, the paintings and sculptures were nice enough to look at even if she didn’t have Jester’s excitement. There were a lot of paintings of naked people in some of the exhibits, which Beau enjoyed since there weren’t a lot of men as the subject. She had to hand it to the old masters, they might have been a bunch of old pervs, but they painted a pretty dame without her clothes. Even if they did give their works pretentious names like, “the Sin of Sarenrae,” or “the Seducer of Nations,” as if the women who were the subjects were at fault for being beautiful enough for men to want to paint them naked.

Eventually Jester got bored, it didn't take long, and they moved on to the other wings of the museum. “I’m gonna check out the Xhorhasian exhibit for a bit Jester,” Beau said, needing some alone time. She loved her best friend, but the girl could talk forever on her worst day, a day surrounded by hundreds of years of artwork around her meant she hadn’t stopped since Beau mentioned her paper.

The Xhorhasian exhibit was small and quiet, they were technically at peace, legally and all that, but two powerful countries can’t be neighbors without a lot of animosity. With only the Ashkeeper Peaks between them, there had been a long cycle of wars and ceasefires between the two nations that could break at any moment. That meant not a lot of people congregated in this out of the way exhibit. Most of the artwork and relics were probably technically stolen. Beau wasn’t happy about that despite being a citizen of the Empire, born and raised in Kamordah, less than a day from Zadash.

Maybe after she graduated she could break into the museum and somehow send the stolen goods back home where they belonged. Jester would probably be into it, and Veth wasn’t exactly opposed to petty theft or grand larceny. But that was for Future Beau with her bachelor’s degree to think about. For now, since they were here, Beau was going to enjoy the things from the Empire’s oldest enemy and learning about them, despite how they were procured.

Technically, the Empire wasn’t enemies with Xhorhas, they were enemies with the Krynn Dynasty, the country that had been the dominant power in the Wastes of Xhorhas for thousands of years. There were other people living in Xhorhas that were roped into the conflict, or so Beau heard, most of the stories from the East were about the Cricks or Krynn and the rest were hardly mentioned at all.

As Beau walked around the empty exhibit, for the most part it was bleaker than the other exhibits. Xhorhas seemed like a dreary place, all their artwork lacked the color of other nations artwork. Most of the paintings, few of them as there were, tended to be battle scenes of Drow soldiers in their dark insect like armor tearing through Empire soldiers like paper, it's a wonder citizens of the Empire never come to look at this exhibit. The rest was mostly pottery or weapons, the placards said they were souvenirs from survivors of perilous expeditions into enemy territory. Beau had read them all before.

But surprising her, there was something new in the exhibit. In the center of the exhibit, in a place of honor was a statue with lights pointing down on it. It was made of white marble and depicted the most beautiful woman Beau had ever seen. She was large, tall and wide, if she wasn’t made of stone she would tower over Beauregard, with arm muscles larger than Beau’s head. Long wild hair that the sculpture had managed to get across in the marble. She wasn’t just standing still either, she was swinging a sword like some goddess of battle. The massive feathery wings exploding from her back, that almost looked soft to the touch despite being made out of rock, made her seem even more divine. But even more than the wings, Beau was drawn to her eyes, they were perfect. Despite being just another part of the woman carved from the white stone, they seemed so dark, holding so much anger and sadness that it made Beau’s chest hurt to look into them, but she didn't have the willpower to look away.

The only flaw Beau could find in the sculpture of the beautiful woman, was the smile. Unlike the rest of the statue, the smile was just off. It was just too plain. The rest of the work from the woman, from the way the marble simulated how her arm muscles tensed like a real person would when swing a sword to fight, to her large soulful eyes, to the massive two-handed sword that looked like it was a real metal blade turned to stone, was the work of a master. Yet the smile was clearly the work of an armature, it looked like the smiles Beau had drawn on posters to look extra goofy to passersby. It didn’t fit such a beautiful woman, especially when the rest of her was clearly ready for battle.

It looked so off Beau immediately looked at the placard to find out if it had been damaged in shipping and the archeologist or smuggler did their best to fix it with a smile. The sign didn’t say anything about the smile, just that the sculpture had been found 3 years ago in an ‘expedition’ in the south of Xhorhas. The title of the piece was ‘Angel of Beauty,’ which made Beau gag. Sure the woma-, the sculpture was beautiful, but it was such a boring shitty title for such an awesome bitch. She was wielding a sword ready to chop someone to bits and ready to take on a whole army, Angel of Beauty was such a generic title for a real work of art. Skimming the rest of the paragraph for any more info, Beau learned the locals called the work ‘The Orphanmaker,’ before the archeologist procured the work.

Beau thought it was a bit better, at least more metal and fitting for such a bad bitch, but it still didn’t fit the woman or the sculpture in Beau’s unasked for opinion. Still, Beau couldn’t let her dumb lesbian brain that made her have a crush on the only more unattainable woman in the world than Jester, stop her from getting her paper done. She took a picture of the placard to get a reference and took a few more of the statue itself from as many angles as she could. You weren’t technically supposed to take pictures of the artwork, but no one was around and Beau needed the pictures for her project…, and nothing else.

Still, the more time she spent with the statue the more Beau was enthralled. The more she stared at it, from every angle it felt like the woman was ready to come alive at any second. That one second Beau would be staring into eyes of white marble and then she would blink alive the next. The skill of the sculptor had practically tricked Beau into thinking the woman would have a pulse if she touched her, like she wasn’t carved out of stone.

It got to the point where Beau, who would never break the law, especially when it came to stolen art, got so fed up she decided to touch the statue just to prove to herself it wasn’t a real live person. Just a quick tap on the arm to prove to herself that the woman wasn’t alive, that’s all it would take to make her crazy thoughts quiet for a bit.

Unfortunately, or perhaps very fortunate given the outcome, Beau was wrong, very wrong. The moment she touched what would be the flesh of the woman, not her sword, or hair, or clothes, the moment her finger touched the skin on the woman’s arm, it felt warm. So warm that Beau couldn’t believe it, until the woman’s pulse woke her up. She tore her hand away like the statue was made of fire, but even as she did, she could see cracks forming in the sculpture starting from where she touched the woman on the arm.

“Shit,” Beau yelled, as she slammed her back into the wall, she didn’t even know she had backed away that far. She desperately tried to search for glue or anything that she could use to fix the crack she made, but the cracks only got bigger. By the time Beau looked back, they had shot down the woman’s arm and were coming down her body, and Beau only had time to swear every curse she knew in the five languages she spoke fluently (which you would think would take a while, but Beau had always been quick with her mouth and was well practiced with it and cursing) before the statue exploded.

The room was full of dust clouds and the only sound other than the hammering of Beau’s heart was the sound of a large woman breathing heavily. It only took a moment for the dust to clear and give Beau a good look at the Orphan Maker. On a whole, she was pretty much the same as the statue, same massive frame, same gorgeous face that Beau had gone gaga for, same strong arms holding the now sharp steel blade, and older Xhorhasian garb, not from the Krynn Dynasty. Now that she wasn’t a statue anymore though, there was a big change, even if she was mostly the same, there was a big difference between a beautiful woman carved out of white marble and a real gorgeous flesh and blood woman.

Her skin was pale, almost as pale as the white marble, but the rest of her and her clothes had splashes of color, mostly black, but not white stone. The biggest change though, other than being a living person of course, was her wings. When she was a statue the wings on her back had been white and feathery, now, they were black and skeletal. As if they had been burnt to cinder’s but still attached to her. She has heterochromatic eyes, one is light green, the other is violet, they are filled with rage, but it’s not directed at Beau, the woman who burst from the marble is just angry.

“Where am I,” the strange woman demanded once the dust cleared enough to see Beau.

“The Zadash University Museum,” Beau said trying to stay on the good side of this strange Amazonian goddess that just flexed out of a statue.

“Zadash,” the woman said slowly, like it was a foreign word. “That is a is a name from beyond the mountains,” she asked more than said.

“Yeah,” Beau nodded, “or I mean I suppose. We’re on the other side of the mountains from Xhorhas if that’s what you mean.”

“Then I am a long way from home,” the strange woman said seeming to calm down.

“Are you a spy from Xhorhas,” Beau asked, immediately realizing how stupid that sounded. Beau could handle herself in a fight, but this woman was massive and had a sword almost the size of her. It would be really hot if it was in a movie or a book instead of real life.

“No,” the woman shouted, “I am from Xhorhas, but I am no spy.”

“Alright,” Beau said, throwing her hands up to show she meant no harm, “I believe you.”

“I think…, I am lost,” the woman said calming down, her voice was a lot softer than Beau would have guessed when she wasn’t angry. “I was in my homeland, I was fighting something and then…, nothing.”

“Well, maybe you could start with something you do remember,” Beau asked, trying to keep things calm. “Do you remember your name?”

“Yasha,” Yasha apparently answered after a moment, “Yasha Nydoorin. And I think I need your help.”

It probably wasn’t a great idea to agree to this, she didn’t know Yasha much other than she was big, gorgeous, and popped out of a marble statue. But despite her well above average intelligence, she was also a lesbian with a dumb lesbian brain sometimes, and all she could say was “sure.” Maybe she’ll let Jester drag her off to the museum if this happens all the time.

[princesssarcastia]

a veronica mars leverage au, i guess, because what else should i be doing with my life?

*deep sigh*

So I was thinking about the mechanics of a veronica mars leverage au—as in, veronica mars characters in a leverage like set-up, because the leverage setup is the golden standard™ of like, the known universe.

you have veronica mars, mastermind; the rest of the crew being made up of wallace, mac, logan, and weevil.  and mac is obviously the hacker.

but I also think that, in this au, the roles won’t be so clear cut.  the problem is that in veronica mars, all of these characters (except mac, who is an archetype) display different skills from each of the five defined roles in the leverage universe: hitter, hacker, grifter, thief, mastermind. 

veronica is a mastermind, sure, but she also makes killer fake IDs and breaks into systems like hardison does and is a hell of a grifter.

weevil can throw down, and lift things like a thief, and even pull one over on someone in a grifter-like fashion. and as head of the PCHers he has some definitive mastermind tendencies; he knows how to plan a fight, and a con.

wallace is more of a solid dude than a member of the criminal element, but when veronica needs him, he’s played roles like a grifter and pulled off lifts like a thief.

logan has a talent for violence, but also can lie like he breathes and put on shows to convince the best of them.

really i guess they all just have a little grifter in them.

if I had to had to had to give them all definitive leverage archetypes, though, it would be veronica: mastermind, logan: hitter, Weevil: thief, wallace: grifter, and of course, mac: hacker.

veronica is the mastermind because she knows all of them best, knows what they can do; because she’s capable of putting all the moving pieces together into one perfect plan; but also because she’s a control freak with maaaajior trust issues.  there’s no way she could ever let anyone else be in charge.

logan is the hitter because he’s just got that underlying current of violence about him at all times, but also because my absolute favortie scenes of his are when he’s being protective of veronica.  not that end of season three bullshit, mind you, but like the scene in season one when he rescues her from the federal agent, or the scene in season two when he bluffs his way into and out of the irish mob’s territory with an unloaded gun to save veronica.  make him the hitter and we get breathtaking violence from him, sure.  but we also get to see logan at his best: giving a damn about the well-being of others. 

weevil is the thief because this guy is smooth.  he pulled the heist at the carnival brilliantly in s2; and he stole that pen from the Kane household in s1 successfully even though the police arrested him and catalogued everything on his person, including the pen. it’s a bit of a square peg in a round hole, but I feel like he;d have comfortable knowledge of security systems and guard rotations and police jurisdictions.

wallace is the grifter because i’ve noticed that a lot of the times he asks veronica for advice on how to do stuff, its grift-related.  “how do I seduce the fake head cheerleader?” for example.  and he pulls some short term grifts for her, like when he infiltrates the silicon mafia at SD State.  also he’s got the best innate knowledge of who people are and what they’re like.  yeah, veronica can pull people apart, but Wallace is just good with them in a way she isn’t.  and also he’s got the most emotional maturity out of any of these basket cases.

mac is the hacker because she’s god’s gift to computers, duh.

what I really want, though; what any good leverage AU is an excuse to do, is to make a found family out of these losers.  imagine if these five people all...trusted and loved each other, in addition to liking one another??  i’m drooling just thinking about it.

I also think that, ironically enough, being righteous criminals in constant close contact would work wonders for veronica and logan’s relationship, lbr.  if veronica is mastermind-ing their cons, she doesn’t have to wonder what logan—or any of her other friends, for that matter—are doing, and go a little crazy to find out.  it’s an outlet for her control-freak-trust-issues.

aaaand if logan is their hitter/muscle, it’s literally his job to protect everyone, including veronica.  violently, if necessary. 

plus, they can both work out their paranoia on things that aren’t each other—cause it’s not paranoia if they’re really out to get you.

the best episodes always involved Veronica pulling her friends into cons with her; VM the show is already only a hop-skip-and-a-jump away from leverage, anyway!  solving mysteries, sure, but also getting revenge, retrieving items, getting even...providing leverage.

like, seriously.

Veronica and Wallace effortlessly pulling a grift out of their asses when they’re caught in a sticky situation, using that emotional drift comparability in their brOTP.

Mac, getting the respect and cash she deserves for finding information and recovering hard drives and also, giving her righteous side some room to move.

Logan and Weevil sniping at each other, maybe having not-so-faux fights as distractions or part of a con— but having each other’s backs.  playing partners in macho stoicism even though we all know they’re softies sometimes.

Wallace and Mac, standing to the side as exasperated captains of the maturity and stability team while Logan and Veronica share a dumpster fire.

Veronica and Weevil doing that thing, you know, where they’re kind of flirting and kind of pulling one over on their audience and pulling each other out of messes.

Wallace, prince among men, getting to play the handsome and charming credit to his gender he is.  imagine, if you will, him pulling honey-trap cons on marks like sophie deveraux did.  i am and it’s delightful.

the worst part about canon!VM is how much they all (veronica.  largely veronica) tore one another down; betrayed people; didn’t trust them; hurt them; expected the worst and got it in self-fulfilling bullshit.  imagine if all of that went away and then write it for me pleeeaaaseee

i’ve been brainstorming and like, there’s two paths you could go.  one is a complete graft to the leverage fusion, in which they never actually went to high school together but instead are professional criminals who all grew into their own on their own and came together.  in this path, we’d come in on our anti-heroes already in the thick of it—or at least, having deep histories together that allow them to trust one another right away.

the other is like, veronica falls to the “dark side” in high school and drags them all with her, handing out black hats as she goes. perhaps in a world where Aaron Echolls gets acquitted and Duncan Kane does not have an assassin at the ready to avenge his sister outside the law, where Veronica literally can’t sleep at the thought of him out there.  a world where Logan and Weevil have that same insomnia, and Mac and Wallace care about Veronica enough to help. 

and maybe it starts out as just a way to get new evidence so a judge can declare a retrial and get Aaron convicted; but ohhh, Aaron Echolls is not a man who can leave well enough alone.  He’s a rich, powerful, attention seeking mother fucker who likes to taunt logan and veronica about what he did to lily.  so even though it’s not Duncan paying for him to get assassinated, the end result is the same: Aaron dead as a doornail, like he deserves.

Maybe it’s a fake suicide, like Veronica planned out for her criminology course, the literal perfect crime.  Maybe he gets murdered and dumped on Lamb’s doorstep with an audio recording of him confessing—edited by Mac, of course, to make sure Veronica and Logan’s parts in the charade weren’t included.

also i’d like to think that, in this world where they wear black hats to better play white knights, Veronica and Logan have just...the best-worst reputation.  Yeah, they melt around each other, but ho-ly shit they’re still lethal—especially if you put one in danger.   Maybe Logan’s got a reputation as an attack dog, and maybe Veronica’s got a reputation as holding his leash, and maybe they’ve proven they’re willing to do anything to keep each other safe.  Maybe, they made a deal, a long time ago when they started out: Veronica gets to get into anything she wants, whatever crusade is currently pushing her buttons, as long as she brings Logan along to protect her. 

their story is epic, after all.

anyway! In Conclusion, tl;dr, someone please stop me from having veronica mars feelings, and if leverage could please stop being the best found family ever, that would probably help.

[wonderfulworldofmichaelford]

Psycho Analysis: The Rogues Gallery of the Powerpuff Girls

(WARNING! This analysis contains SPOILERS!)

There are few rogues galleries I hold in higher esteem than that of the Powerpuff Girls. Aside from Spider-Man, Batman, and Danny Phantom, there are few heroes who can claim to have a more colorful and creative set of foes than the crimefighting superheroines of the city of Townsville. Previously I’ve talked about their archenemy, the wonderfully devilish Mojo Jojo, but they have a lot of other great villains worth talking about… so, why not just talk about all of them at once?

This one’s gonna be a little different, and will be divided into two sections: MAJOR ANTAGONISTS and MINOR ANTAGONISTS. Major antagonists will be villains that the girls fought most frequently, while minor antagonists will be notable one shot villains and lesser foes.

MAJOR ANTAGONISTS

These are the foes that the girls face most frequently in the series, and the ones that will likely come to mind when you think of the show’s rogues gallery. Aside from Mojo Jojo, and according to TVTropes, the major antagonists from the series are Him, Fuzzy Lumpkins, the Gangreen Gang, Princess Morbucks, the Amoeba Boys, Sedusa, and the Rowdyruff Boys.

Motivation/Goals: The major antagonists all tend to vary in what exactly they want to do, but they all have one thing in common: their motivations are broad enough that they can fit into a wide variety of plots. Him is the best example, because his goal tends to be a vague mix of “take over the city/world” and “be an absolute dick,” which leads to all sorts of battles such as the bad future where he rules the Earth or the episode where he sends the girls out on a series of ridiculous riddles as part of a bet with Professor Utonium to see if he has to pay his full tab at Him’s pancake restaurant. Considering Him is supposed to be a stand in for Satan himself and is the ultimate evil of the show (even if his power level doesn’t always reflect that), it makes sense he’d constantly be doing crazy, tricky schemes like this.

Of course, not all of these villains are massive threats like Him; others are simply nuisances, like the Gangreen Gang, who just love going out and committing crimes for the fun of it in between their leader Ace moonlighting as a member of the Gorillaz. While they are still dangerous, they tend to be motivated to do things just because they find it amusing, like when they snuck into the mayor’s office and crank called the girls into repeatedly harassing the other villains. Then there’s Princess, who is basically just a snotty superpowered bully who decided to turn to a life of crime because the girls wouldn’t let her become a Powerpuff Girl. She’s motivated entirely out of jealousy and spite, but she never really rises to the level of a truly world-threatening threat, though she did almost screw up Christmas one time to the point Santa decided to slap her on the permanent Naughty List. The final major antagonist who falls into this category is Sedusa, who true to her name, seduces men. That’s… about it. She also has prehensile hair.

The Rowdyruff Boys are kind of a mix of being super serious dangers and just being jerks, as they were created by Mojo to be the opposite of the girls and so have all of their powers but none of their good qualities aside from maybe their love for each other (which they rarely show, but it’s there). They’re mostly just jerks and love to cause chaos, but sicne they have all the same sort of abilities as Blossom, Bubbles, and Buttercup, they’re a lot more dangerous than the typical foe would be, and that’s not even counting the fact that their two “dads” are Him and Mojo, which means they have the cream of the crop when it comes to bad role models.

The last type of major villain is perhaps the funniest, because these are the villains who are just so bad at being evil that it’s comical. Fuzzy is a lighter example, as he’s not exactly bad at being evil; he’s just more not evil to begin with unless provoked or manipulated by other villains. He’s entirely content to just sit about at his shack, strumming his banjo, but if you piss him off he’s gonna grab his gun or a big old rock and cause some mayhem. The crown emperors of being failure villains, however, are the Amoeba Boys. These guys are the most utterly inept dumbasses you will ever see, a group so utterly bad at being bad that no one in the show is able to take them seriously. Since they are amoebas, albeit rather large ones, they don’t have the mental capacity to do much more than the most petty of crimes such as – GASP! - standing on grass when there’s a sign that says not to! Or even… LITTERING! Those fiends!

Performance: Tom Kane portrays Him, and alternately is able to make him hilarious and terrifying. It’s pretty amusing to think that the guy who played Professor Utonium and Mr. Herriman is capable of playing such a messed-up villain (ok, maybe not so much for the latter, Mr. Herriman was wack).

Fuzzy is portrayed by everyone’s favorite Trump supporting Pooh bear, Jim Cummings, and that good ol’ ragin’ Cajun accent he’d use in The Princess and the Frog and Zombie Island fits this southern hick quite well.

Ace, Big Billy, and Grubber of the Gangreen Gang are voiced by series MVP Jeff Bennet, who manages to make all three characters very distinct and unqiue in their voices, capturing the lovable oafishness of Billy and the smug leadership of Ace very well, and obviously whatever it is Grubber is doing. Lil’ Arturo and Snake are Tom Kenny, though the former was in his first appearance voiced by Carlos Alazraqui, which means twice now Tom Kenny has usurped Alazraqui in a voice role (the other time being the title character of the Spyro the Dragon franchise). Tom Kenny, being Tom Kenny, does a great job.

Princess and Sedusa are both voiced by Jennifer Hale, but I’m gonna be honest, neither of them are my favorite roles. Princess just has a really shrill and unpleasant voice - which is the point, mind you, I just don’t love it. Meanwhile, Sedusa is just forgettable.

The Amoeba Boys are Chuck McCann, and he gives all of them the exact sort of goofy, cartoonish Chicago gangster accent you could hope for, though each boy has a distinct voice. The other boy group, the Rowdyruffs, are voiced by Rob Paulsen for Brick and Boomer (the man behind the legend that is Carl Wheezer) and Butch is Roger L. Jackson (Mojo Jojo himself). As can be expected, the RRBs have very distinct voices, though I can’t say they’re quite as memorable as the characters they’re directly copying. 

Best Episode: So yeah, this time instead of individuals scenes, I’m highlighting the very best episodes of the various foes of the Girls. First, let’s get the obvious one out of the way: if we’re talking altogether for Him, Fuzzy, and Princess, their appearance alongside Mojo in “Meet the Beat Alls” is just utterly hilarious, ESPECIALLY Fuzzy’s rock, their breakup bickering, and just how they decide to come together and cause chaos. As far as villain teamups go, you can’t get better than one that is nothing but a constant string of Beatles references (though they lose some points for not drawing attention to the fact that Him is based on the Blue Meanie from Yellow Submarine).

Individually, for Him, it really depends on what you’re looking for, since he’s a very versatile villain. If you want him at his best and most serious, “Speed Demon” is the way to go, as it shows a bad future where he has completely won, which goes a long way towards establishing him as the single most dangerous enemy of the girls. But if you want funny Him, well, “Him Diddle Riddle” is an absolute riot which leads to one of the most shockingly ridiculous punchlines in the show. It’s a real treat.

For Fuzzy, I’d say his main series debut “Fuzzy Logic” is a great solo showing, firmly establishing the character and how he has changed from the initial pilot. Fuzzy is an amusing character to be sure, but I feel his best showings are in ensemble pieces, which is why I say his debut is his best work.

For the Gangreen Gang, the obvious answer is, of course, “Telephonies,” because this is them at their most hilariously petty. They just sneak into the mayor’s office and crank call the other villains, and in the end, the day is saved! ...By Mojo, Fuzzy, and Him. Even the narrator is baffled at this one, but you’ll probably be laughing too hard to care about that.

Princess gets one of the best Christmas specials ever with “’Twas the Fight Before Christmas,” where she scams Santa into giving her superpowers while every other kid in the world gets coal. Of course, the Girls don’t take this lying down, and Princess gets the most awesome comeuppance ever, courtesy of Santa: she gets her name carved into the Permanent Naughty Plaque which has such notable figures as Adolph Shicklgruber, who you may know better as fucking Hitler. That’s right, Santa came right out and said Princess Morbucks is as naughty as Hitler is.

The Amoeba Boys have their main series debut, “Geshundfight,” which does a firm job of establishing these guys as such utterly incompetent morons that you can’t help but love them. It also establishes that these guys could only ever be a threat by complete accident. It’s good to see the boys got better after the girls threw them into the sun in the “Whoopass Stew” pilot!

Sedusa has “Something’s a Ms.” While Sedusa herself tends to be a rather dull antagonist, this episode rules and is her best appearance for one reason and one reason alone: we get to see Ms. Bellum kick ass. Hell yeah!

“Custody Battle” is the best appearance of the Boys because, let’s face it, having Mojo and Him argue over who has the right to be called their dad (Mojo Created them, Him resurrected them) is absolutely hilarious, and a great use of the characters.

Final Thoughts & Score: Alright, let’s go one by one here:

Him

Him is easily the best of the bunch and, aside from Mojo, is the definitive Powerpuff villain. I think part of it is, much like Mojo, Him is capable of being a hilarious jerk or a genuinely intimidating threat in equal measure. You get showings where all he does is try and make the Professor pay a full tab on his breakfast or give everyone tooth decay or even just hang out in his house and do some aerobics, and then you have episodes where he decimates the earth in the future or torments the girls in their dreams. He kind of really fits a lot of the old folkloric tales of the devil, where he could be anything from a prankster to outright malicious, for all it’s worth, and being based on the Blue Meanie certainly doesn’t hurt either. He’s just a very fun character who fits into so many different situations, and so he easily gets a 10/10.

Fuzzy Lumpkins

Fuzzy is an odd one, because as I mentioned earlier, he’s not really a true villain in the sense that he goes out and commits crimes for the sake of it like the others. He’s more of a chaotic neutral force than anything, who goes on angry rampages or gets swayed over to the dark side whenever the mood suits him. It’s kind of interesting how he was a smarter and calmer character in the pilot, where he invented a gun that could turn things into meat… but in the show proper, he’s just a dumb, irritable hick. While he’s certainly not the best member of the rogues gallery, there’s something charming about Fuzzy, and I definitely love his design and voice; I think he gets a 7/10.

The Gangreen Gang

These guys are some of the more enjoyable antagonists in the rogues gallery despite typically not being a huge threat. I think, really, that’s what makes them so fun; they’re a lot more low-key and just in general more prone to just being dicks than doing anything on the level of Him or Mojo. They’re the fun kind of villains where you don’t ever really need to take them seriously, to the point you can fully accept their leader Ace joining the Gorillaz, which is a thing that actually happened in real life and it’s amazing. I think that alone is enough to edge these guys into a 9/10.

Princess Morbucks

So out of all the major antagonists, I think Princess is probably my least favorite, mostly because she’s just a snotty, entitled, rich little brat. That being said, I’m not overly opposed to her, nor do I hate her; I really can’t hate a character that Santa Claus deemed is the moral equivalent of Hitler. I can’t stress enough how much I love Santa came right out and said “Rich lives don’t matter” and just slapped this little girl with the most grievous punishment you could give. Overall, Princess functions as a casual reminder rich people suck, and I’m okay with that, even if she’s not particularly high on my favorites. 7/10 is a solid score for her, I feel.

The Amoeba Boys

Idiot villains wish they could be these guys. Literally, as far as idiotic harmless villains go, these lads are the absolute cream of the crop. The fact these are giant amoebas wearing fedoras and talking like stereotypical gangsters and yet are so incompetent they don’t even know how voodoo dolls work and think that littering and standing on grass is the greatest crime of all is just… amazing. These guys are perfect. And yet they are so incompetent and harmless that it’s almost unfair to call them villains, despite how desperately they want to be villains. The fact everyone in the show treats them as a mild annoyance at best really goes a long way to making these guys endearing. They’re certainly not the best foes in the rogues gallery, but I think an 8/10 is a good score for these single-celled suckers.

Sedusa

I’m frankly not sure why she’s considered a “main antagonist” on TVTropes; when I think of PPG villains, she really doesn’t come to mind. Frankly, if she is a “main” antagonist, she’s one of the most boring and forgettable ones there is. Sure, she has a couple of decent episodes, and of course the one where Ms. Bellum gets her time to shine is a classic, but overall Sedusa is just a mediocre villain who doesn’t do enough to stand out among the crowd. I’d say she’s a 4/10. I think if they had gone with the concept from her third appearance where she had all those cool Egyptian powers from the start she would have been a far more engaging and fun antagonist. But hey, she gave Ms. Bellum her time to shine, so I can’t really say she’s all too abysmal.

The Rowdyruff Boys

So… these guys. I’m not particularly sure what to really say about these guys. They’re some of the most popular antagonists the PPG have, and they have great interactions with Him and Mojo. But they’ve never quite struck me as being as amazing as others have hyped them up to be. Maybe I just don’t quite vibe with their concept. All that being said, though, they’re not bad antagonists in the slightest, I just kind of find them uninspired as a concept. It won’t keep me from giving them an 8/10, so don’t worry about that, I just don’t find the idea of evil versions of the PPG to be particularly interesting.

And now we go on to the lesser rogues, the one-shot or minor antagonists! They don’t have the major presence the villains above do, but remember, you don’t have to be a major reoccurring villain just to make an impact; sometimes you just gotta be good at what you do.

Also, this is by no means an exhaustive list; I’ve left off some minor antagonists and probably forgot some, and then there’s some that just don’t have enough info to talk about. Like, I would love to tell you all the wonders of Salami Swami, but there’s just not enough… oh well… let’s talk about these guys. And they aren’t going to have a best episode listed, because… well, they’re minor one-shot characters. By default their best appearance is their only appearance.

Motivation/Goals: Unlike with the major villains, there’s a lot more variety in the one-shot characters, with their goals ranging from simple robbery to revenge to chaos for the sake of it. And yes, sure, their major villains do that stuff too, but they tend to have a solid theme, whereas these folk tend to have one gimmick that they run with for a whole episode before vanishing, never to be seen again. For instance, Femme Fatale is a raging radical feminist; Abracadaver is a lich who seeks revenge for his violent, untimely death; the Gnome is a cult leader who commits mass genocide of other villains so that he can create a utopian society; and Mr. Mime is a mime.

What I think separates them from the major foes is that they have a singular gimmick and they need to really excel at it, because if they screw it up, they’re gonna go down in infamy. Femme Fatale is not a villain who is recalled fondly, for instance, because her gimmick was horribly botched. Meanwhile, characters like the Boogie Man or the Gnome are looked at more fondly because of their silly and cool gimmicks that make them stand out (being a disco-themed monster under the bed and being a gnome with a beautiful singing voice that sounds like a certain lead singer of Tenacious D, respectively).

Performance: Let’s go one by one on these:

The Gnome is voiced by none other than Jess Harnell, who you may know as Wakko Warner or the current (as of 2020) voice of numerous Crash Bandicoot characters, including everyone’s favorite Wumpa-loving title character. They couldn’t afford the real Jack Black, but I think that Harnell does a very impressive vocal imitation of JB, to the point where you’d be forgiven for assuming that it was JB in the first place. The fantastic singing voice is no shock if you’ve ever watched Animaniacs, but boy is it good to hear.

Jeff Bennet may be the MVP of the lesser rogues, as he voices Major Man, Dick Hardly, and Harold Smith. This is quite a variety of characters each with different personalities and goals, so it’s pretty great he was able to give them all the exact sort of vocal characterization they needed to be distinct. On the subject of the Smiths, though,

Femme Fatale is Grey DeLisle doing a very generic voice. Like, it sounds like a less cheerful Daphne or a less evil Azula. I think she may have just been talking in her normal voice for this one? It just doesn’t really have anything to it to make it stand out among her more notable roles.

Boogie Man is voice acting god Kevin Michael Richardson, who has voiced numerous characters I really should do a Psycho Analysis on such as Chairman Drek and Gantu. There’s really nothing else to say here, really; Richardson gives exactly the sort of glorious performance you’d expect for a funky blaxploitation pastiche boogeyman. Talk about black excellence!

Lenny is Tom Kenny. Tom Kenny really does a good job with weird geeks like this, and so what else can I say but he did a good job with this creepy neckbeard. Abracadaver is played by legendary voice actor Frank Welker, who is in literally everything, but who you mostly know as Fred from Scooby-Doo. Much like with Kenny, he kills it in the role.

Finally, our last speaking villain is Roach Coach, and he’s most notable because he is voiced by Roger L. Jackson, who would graduate from this starter one-shot to become none other than Mojo Jojo. I don’t find Roach Coach quite as memorable a performance, but Jackson certainly doesn’t half-ass it.

Final Thoughts & Score:

The Gnome

I think the Gnome is one of the single most fascinating one-shot villains in the series, and not just because “See Me, Feel Me, Gnomey” is a gloriously cheesy rock opera where he gets to be the villain. His philosophies are incredibly intriguing and are sort of the focus of the episode, and his effectiveness is frankly unmatched as a villain; he succeeds in killing every villain in the series for a time. And while he is a bit hypocritical in that he too wanted to rule over Townsville and transforms it into a cult, he does ultimately realize that he was in the wrong and not only graciously accepts his defeat, but allows himself to die to return the world to its natural order, stating:

“"As I descend to the earth and I view the universe above me, I realize that life evolves, revolves, and dissolves completely around the opposites. Therefore, I conclude that I cannot exist in my...utopian...mind."

That’s a low 9/10 if I ever saw one. They didn’t need to go and make this Jack Black gnome in a rock opera such a fascinating character, but there we have it.

Dick Hardly

Dick Hardly is one of the most “love to hate” characters in the show’s entire run, and it’s not hard to see why; he is the lowest of the low, the scummiest scum there ever was. Look at this excerpt from the PPG Wiki, which was a godsend when writing all this up:

“Despite appearing only once in the 1998 series and never in the various spin-offs or the 2016 series, Dick Hardly is among the franchise's most memorable villans [sic]. This is because he's the only member of the PPG Rogues Gallery who has absolutely no redeeming or comedic qualities. Most villains have lines they will never cross. However, Dick is ruthless enough to kill anyone in order to achieve his goals, even his own ex-friends. In fact, he actually manages to make HIM (who is nastier than Mojo Jojo) look like a saint in comparison.”

He’s a slimy, ruthless, unrepentant bastard, and the fact he’s one of the few villains to bite the big one just helps him stand out even more. Throw in his incredibly cool monstrous transformation, and despite his single episode it’s not hard to give this Dick a 9/10.

Femme Fatale

So not to be lazy, but I did kind of do a Psycho Analysis on Femme Fatale back when I did an Episodyssey on her sole appearance. And yeah, I stand by what I gave her there; she’s a 2/10. She’s just a really preachy, obnoxious, and poorly executed moralizing villain. I’m also gonna go out on a limb here and say that she probably hates trans people. I suppose that’s just a headcanon but… come on. Look at her. If this show was TV-14 and came out today, she’d be even less subtle in her contempt for trans people than every episode of South Park that featured Mrs. Garrison. Enough headcanons though; she doesn’t get the lowest marks possible because, quite simply, she has a pretty nice design and her voice acting is good enough since it is Jennifer Hale.

Mr. Mime

Oops, wrong picture.

There we go! Anyway, Mr. Mime is a really cool character with a frustrating resolution. Through no fault of his own, Rainbow the clown accidentally gets hit by a bleach truck and loses his color, becoming the evil Mr. Mime, gaining the ability to sap the color and sound from the world with a touch. He’s actually a seriously awesome concept, and the episode itself is good… and then comes the ending where, despite turning back to normal, Rainbow gets the crap kicked out of him and sent to jail, which is strangely cruel for the Girls to do. Apparently they later made amends, because Rainbow shows up at their birthday, but it still leaves a bad taste in my mouth. A 7/10 is a good score for this guy.

Boogie Man

The Boogie Man is arguably the greatest villain in anything ever. He is entirely built around one of the most groan-worthy puns imaginable and plays that pun up for all its worth, being a monster under the bed who utilizes a disco theme to the point he blocks out the sun with a gigantic disco ball. The dude has funky style and if that’s not enough, he’s voiced by Kevin Michael Richardson, who gives him the exact sort of voice he needs. The dude is just like something out of the craziest blaxploitation film ever, and he certainly brings the funk to the point where even though he only got one appearance in the series, I wouldn’t hate to bump this guy to an 8/10. What else is there to say but “Blame it on the boogie!”

The Smiths

These guys are just a very funny concept. I kind of like villains who do stuff for the pettiest, mundane reasons, and these guys take it all to the logical extreme. The patriarch of the family decides to dress up in a tacky supervillain outfit to get “revenge” on Professor Utonium because… he envies his perfect life. The rest of his family turn to villainy to avenge him, and are just as pathetic and ineffectual as he is. It’s so funny in a sad kind of way. I think a 6/10 is what they deserve, because while they aren’t particularly effective or groundbreaking, they’re at least good for a chuckle or two. Ultimately though they are a less impressive version of the Nelsons from Minions.

Major Man

Major Man is very interesting because he is very clearly an homage to Johnny Bravo; they’ve got the same hair, the same muscular body type (though Major Man is certainly beefier), the same voice actor! And yet, they couldn’t be any more different. Johnny, as much of a dense womanizer as he is, does have a hidden heart of gold beneath it all and usually means well; meanwhile, Major Man is a self-serving jerk who wants to play superhero. You know, he kind of reminds me of Homelander from The Boys in some ways. Anyway, I think a 6/10 is fair enough for him; he’d get higher if he wasn’t such an interesting concept for a major villain relegated only to a one-shot appearance. He’d have been a better entry in the rogues gallery than freaking Sedusa, for instance.

Abracadaver

So I wanna know how exactly this one got by the censors. This guy is unrelentingly dark, from his origin (he died onstage in front of a crowd which included children) to his absolutely ghastly appearance in which it is very much clear he is decaying and rotten. I honestly kind of love him, despite the fact he only ever appeared once, mostly because I can totally understand why they never used him again. This dude might actually be too scary. I’m giving him a solid 8/10, because I just love how unrelentingly dark he is. It’s definitely a low 8 since he never appeared after his initial appearance (for good reason!), but damn if he isn’t effective and memorable.

Lenny Baxter

Lenny is actually kind of impressive. On the surface, he’s just a gross, exaggerated take on Comic Book Guy from The Simpsons and loony dudebro manchild fans, which is all well and good, he’s pretty effective at being a “take that” and has stood the test of time pretty well/. But, I think what truly makes him memorable is the fact that he actually did manage to capture the Girls and would have won if not for the meddling townsfolk. Then of course there’s the Professor’s wonderfully tranquil takedown of Lenny’s ideology:

"Let me tell you something, Lenny. You may have all of the toys, all of the merchandise, all of the so-called “collector’s value.” But one thing you don’t have, Lenny, is true fandom. For a true fan wouldn't want to selfishly keep the girls to himself. A true fan would want them to be free."

I think that for a disposable one-shot villain, Lenny is surprisingly relevant even today. I think he deserves a 7/10, though obviously he’s not a very high one because ultimately he is just still a normal (albeit very greasy) guy.

Roach Coach

Look, not all villains are created equal. This guy? He’s not too impressive. Sure, he predicted the ending to Team America, and sure, he made a Papa Roach reference, but frankly I don’t think that’s enough to really elevate him into being an impressive one-shot villain. I’d say he’s a 4/10. He’s not lower because he is the starter villain, and his voice actor would go on to bring us the much better and more memorable Mojo Jojo. We all have to start somewhere, right?

The Robbing Leech

This guy is probably one of the freakiest one-shot villains in the series. Unlike Abracadaver, there’s literally nothing explained about this guy. There’s no origin, no explanation, he doesn’t even talk, and hell, the guy might not even be human at all! We the audience are never clued in, and the guy is never seen again, so we’re only left to ponder what exactly this guy is up to. I don’t think he’s quite as disturbing as Abracadaver, but he’s certainly got something going for him in terms of mystery; a 5/10 is fair enough. It would have been neat if they explained something, but I guess he’ll just have to be one of those riddles for the ages. We will never truly know how and why this man was capable of giving people the succ.

And just when you thought it would end...

Salami Swami

Ok, did you honestly think I was going to miss the opportunity to talk about this guy? His name is SALAMI SWAMI. And look at him! He controls MEAT! He only ever appeared once in the episode “Slave the Day,” where his mighty meat powers are no match for the appetites of the reformed Big Billy (formerly of the Gangreen Gang). But like… LOOK AT HIM. The idea and concept and literally everything about him is just so patently absurd and creative that I’m legitimately angry I didn’t come up with it first. He never spoke a single word, but he still managed to find a way into my heart and mind. Can I legitimately rate this guy who had a single joke appearance in the show? Damn right I can! 6/10, baby! If he appeared more or defined his personality a bit better I’d rank him higher but, come on. SALAMI SWAMI. Sometimes all you need to be great is a really incredible, stupid gimmick. And Salami Swami has that in droves; hopefully we can meat him again someday, and he can reignite his beef with the girls while remaining inextricably linked with sausage. 

Ok, I’m done. Goodnight everybody!

[stillwinterair]

Pretty sure this thing is rife with typos and inconsistencies because I spent way too long writing this and Refuse to proofread, but, some notes from the writers’ room (my brain) on my Personal Mental Sequel Trilogy Rewrite:

On paper, I think the Kylo/Snoke situation as it occurs is really compelling. Killing Snoke midway through the trilogy was a stupid move in the context of the trilogy we got, but could have very easily been made to work well with a few changes... many of which in The Force Awakens.

(This is gonna mostly be focused on Kylo Ren, but in this version of the story he’s far from the focus, it’s just kinda what I would want to see from a villain)

The ultimate goal in my own personal version of the trilogy would have been to make the late-second-act twist (this trilogy’s “I am your father” moment) be Kylo Ren becoming Supreme Leader, and cementing himself as the big bad. But to do that effectively... we have to make Kylo Ren more sympathetic. We have to trick the audience into thinking he’ll come around. As it stands... the movies don’t actually do this. A certain subset of fans certainly think they did, but there’s really no buildup to “Bendemption” aside from a single scene where he’s hesitant to kill his mom, I guess. Other than that, he’s all evil, all the time.

He should still do all the same things: slaughter a village of innocents, torture multiple people, stand idly by as his fascist regime destroys the seat of galactic government. But give him moments of pause before they happen, and feed into the “pull to the Light” with whispered voices calling through the Force, begging him to stop. Every time, he almost listens... but he pushes them away. And every time he pushes them away, something in him changes. He stands taller, grips his blade tighter, and his power with the Force grows a little stronger.

Now, another crucial building block to the twist: move Kylo’s “doesn’t wanna shoot Leia” scene up a movie... and give it to Han.

The scene plays out as we see it in TFA: Han Solo pleads with his son to come home (I would have had them find Luke by this point for the sake of a trio reunion but that’s an entirely different thread to follow). Kylo Ren -- or, perhaps, Ben Solo? -- grips the silent hilt of his lightsaber, visibly unsure. Is he going to submit to his father? Does he plan to kill him?

We don’t find out. Not in this movie, anyway.

A blast rings out. A bolt hits Han in the chest, his eyes glaze over, his fingers drift from his son’s cheek, first slowly, then altogether. He tumbles aside, falling to his death. The camera pans: someone, perhaps Phasma or Hux, is looking down the smoking barrel of their rifle. They salute, then quickly take cover as the distraught and agonized trio of Rey, Finn, and Chewbacca begin firing on them.

Rage fills Kylo Ren’s eyes. He tenses. His lips twist into a twitching grimace. It seems entirely focused on Phasma/Hux. Bands of white-hot electricity trace the lengths of his fingers.

And then it all subsides.

He turns on his heel and pursues our trio, and the film proceeds as we’ve seen it, except again, Luke is also there. I’ll figure out that puzzle piece later.

EPISODE VIII:

Snoke should be heavily involved here, very clearly the puppet master pulling Kylo’s strings. Kylo is clearly haunted, though: those whispers we heard throughout the last movie are growing louder. Who are they? Jedi of the past? The souls of the dead? Anakin Skywalker himself, his spirit shattering itself into a million little pieces trying to push past the jagged barrier of Dark-side energy Kylo Ren surrounds himself with?

But Kylo needs to be less composed in this movie than he is in TLJ. No standing around calmly or stoically, he’s constantly on edge, looking over his shoulder, feeling judged by everyone and dreading it. Kylo Ren is tortured and haunted and it feels like at any moment, the facade will break. Clearly, the source of all his problems are because he isn’t being who he’s supposed to be, right? Clearly he could turn around at any moment and become someone better, right? Right?

Rey ends up before Snoke and Kylo Ren again, because she thinks Ben Solo can be saved, because the narrative is at least putting some work into making us think he can (“he’s haunted by the choices he’s been making, why wouldn’t he turn back to the Light?”). Snoke plays them against each other, yadda yadda yadda, but it perhaps becomes apparent that Snoke has an ulterior motive:

He doesn’t want Kylo Ren anymore. He wants Rey.

He toys with them, makes them duel to the death, but there’s a lot at play here: Snoke wants the strongest to survive, to shape them into a more worthwhile apprentice. Rey fights defensively, refusing to give up on Ben. Kylo is as aggressive as we’ve ever seen him, more conflicted than ever, raging against the voices in his head. Turn away from her, and strike him down, they say. Join the girl, rebuild the Jedi. Come back to Luke. Come back to your mother. The voices are familiar: Jedi from the past, friends who have died along the way. And then a final voice rings out, more ghostly than the rest: Come home, son, says Han Solo, an echo of his soul which has left a stain on the Force surrounding his son.

He knows what he has to do.

The electric currents we saw in our previous episode return, stronger now. The ground around him is charred, ash-black. Years of so-called “Gray Jedi” in Legends jump back to mind: are we actually going to see a Light-sider using Force lightning? you might wonder. All of his energy goes into a singular blast, aimed at Rey...

But it arcs past her, decimates Snoke’s guards. The Supreme Leader stands, shocked and enraged. He challenges Kylo: “You dare slaughter your own allies? You, boy, are nothing but a worm! But it matters not. I never needed you, anyway. The girl will take your place, and you’ll die as they did.”

Snoke attacks, but his mastery of the Force is nothing compared to what comes next: a torrent of lightning from the fingers of Kylo Ren.

The blast knocks Rey back, flings Anakin’s lightsaber from her hands. But when she stands, there’s a smile on her face. She did it. She won. The evil in Ben Solo has been vanquished, the Light has prevailed, and the First Order is finally defeated.

She asks him to come back with her, back to Luke, to Leia, to the Jedi. He can start again, help rebuild, save the galaxy.

He turns back to face her, and his eyes are bloodshot and yellow. He’s seething. He extends a hand, and an offer: join him, let the past die, create something new. Feel the power of the Dark side. There’s nothing like it. There never has been, and never will be.

This is the true Kylo Ren. The first steps of his manipulation were led by Snoke, but it was the taste of power that led him the rest of the way. It seduced him. Consumed him.

We cut back to the lightsaber of Anakin Skywalker, lying on the ground far away. We see Ren and Rey far in the background, standing opposed, but they’re out of focus. The lightsaber is all we can truly see. It begins to shiver, as if being called by someone. Presumably Rey. We cut back.

Rey refuses his offer, refuses the power, tempting as it may be.

“No? Then you’ll die as he did. As all your weak friends will.”

Another torrent of lightning bursts forth from Kylo Ren. But Rey makes no moves to defend or attack: she’s utterly in shock, confounded by this turn of events.

When the lightsaber ignites, it isn’t Rey who’s holding it. It’s Finn. Lightning crashes into it, holding it back, long enough for Rey to regain control, Force-push Kylo, and for the two of them to run.

Rey and Kylo’s Force bond from TLJ is maintained, as is the ending shot of Rey closing the door of the Falcon in Kylo’s face... but with it comes a darkness. The bond is severed. The door has been closed forever.

The twist of the Original Trilogy’s second act was that the villain was of our hero’s blood; in the end, it saved him.

The twist of our Sequel Trilogy’s second act is that the tortured soul we thought might have been a hero, never was one and never could be. You ~subvert expectations~ but in a way that builds the mythos and actually pays off a plot thread. Looking back at all of Kylo’s moments of tortured almost-goodness, the realization hits that he always had a chance and never took it, that the whispering voices which followed him, his pull to the Light, were an annoyance that pushed him the other way.

Anakin, Luke, and Ben were easily corrupted by the Dark. The difference is, Anakin was manipulated, Luke had the force of will to be a hero anyway, and Ben reveled in the Darkness. These are the Palpatine genes resurfacing.

And then in our Episode IX, we wouldn’t [re]introduce a new (well, old, but new to this trilogy) villain in the LAST ACT, but would instead build the story and mythos of one villain throughout the trilogy, off the puppet master when his role is done, and let him flourish as the evil bastard he always should have been. And then the Force-ghost of Anakin Skywalker can show up and basically confirm that he hasn’t been around because he’s been trying for decades to reach his grandson, that it consumed all of his power, etc.

Anyway. This is a lot but we could have had a really compelling villain here but they didn’t do fucking ANYTHING with him

[laufire]

Black Sails s3

This one took me longer because RL got in the way LOL. I’ve loved it as much as the other two (even if I am IN PAIN over you-know-who’s death DD:). I don’t know when I’ll have the time to finish the last season, but I wanted to post about this one before starting it; otherwise it’d accumulate with the 10+ and counting metas I want to write about this show once I have the full picture LMAO.

Max

As always, I have to start with her because she’s THE FUCKING BEST. This woman is currently competing for the number one spot among fictional characters in my heart LOL (I mean. I have loved Caroline Forbes --who I actually think Max has a lot in common with lmao. Everything I love is the same, as I always say-- for too many years for her to ever be truly dethroned; unless something goes really wrong with Legacies I guess. However, it’s still remarkable that a character could make me doubt).

I’ve absolutely adored her plot this season; watching her growing sphere of influence, the way she affects and upends others’ lives. That’s very much being present since season one, especially with her and Silver in tandem (I have a lot of Thoughts(TM) about those too as a driving/disruptive force in the show --they’ll go to one of those metas--; I’m put off by the fact that I didn’t get to enjoy them conspiring together this season lol. Though her reaction to the fake Long John Silver letter was kind of hilarious xDD. Still. I kind of wish we’d seen the scene where Silver tells her he renounces to his part of the price. It could’ve been very interesting --I guess he could’ve told Jack but that wouldn’t’ve been as good, so this is my headcanon).

The most obvious storyline where this manifest is in her relationship with Anne and Jack. I love everything about it, but well. I have to admit, the ~betrayal/different sides element appeals to me xD. I like that Max prioritices herself and her safety. That she sees the writing on the wall with the English invasion or with Vane’s execution and acts accordingly, the way she calculates her decisions and forms alliances without letting past grievances get in the way --with Eleanor, Rogers, Mrs. Mapleton...--, the choices she makes because she doesn’t want to be “on the outside looking in” ever again and how they always end reverting in her benefit, ultimately (I’m getting ahead because I am spoiled of quite a few things about s4, but I LOVE that eventually she mends her relationship with Anne and Jack. Because it fits into this: how even the possible mistakes and emotional compromises she makes are within a very specific frame that works out for her in the end).

Her relationship with Anne gets even better this season. I think my favourite scene is where Max tells Anne that she nows Anne “cannot fathom leaving me”. Can I get this woman’s confidence LMFAO. But seriously. I luff them. I love how Max convinces Jack of going along her plan to replace the gold with good easier to transport (and how THAT ends up being Flint’s treasure asdñlfkasfj. MY GIRL DIRECTLY CAUSED THE EVENTS IN TREASURE ISLAND OKAY) by appealing to their mutual love for Anne. That she trusts Anne with the story about her father. That she knows just as well as Jack that Anne wouldn’t give up the treasure so easily and she’ll try to save him (and that Anne won’t stomach the thought of Jack being tortured because she couldn’t bear MAX’S torture. My heart).

Another highlight of the season for me was her relationship with Eleanor, which keeps being a huge surprise no matter what xDD (even if, again, never in a shippy way. I’m very glad the season doesn’t go there). I love the reversal of expectation in a general fandom landscape: how ultimately, Eleanor doesn’t have an emotional hold over Max (and that she lost it as early as 1x02, IMO. I’m not saying “Max doesn’t feel anything about Eleanor”, but the truth of the matter is, narratively Eleanor serves Max, not the other way around. And I’m happy and relieved about it, ngl), and that the same isn’t true the other way around. I thought two very telling scenes where a.) Max hosting parody trials of Eleanor that paint her under a completely undignified light, but clearly deriving no pleasure from it: it simply was yet another thing she does for practically, level-headed political reasons; and b.) that Eleanor orders Rogers’ men not to hurt Anne in the exchange because Max’s love for Anne.

Continuing down with Max’s relationships, I’ve grown to really like hers with Idelle. I think Max find Idelle fun, likeable, uncomplicated (the scene where Featherstone tells Idelle he hopes his pardon doesn’t diminish her attraction to her was hilarious and clearly the moment Max was enjoying herself the most in the whole season lmfao. BTW, I kinda liked Idelle/Featherstone since the moment he told Jack he wasn’t concerned because “he was in love with a good woman” and Jack was like “Idelle??”. Yes, it’s fun because client-falling-for-sex-worker is a pitiful cliché, but here’s the thing: he’s right xD. He didn’t say “I’m in love with a woman who loves me”. He said he was in love with someone GOOD and Idelle IS a good woman, dammit xDD).

Max doesn’t concern herself much with the idea of Idelle going behind her back because Idelle loves her, respects her, and is a loyal friend (and yet clearly sees Max exactly as she is and doesn’t have any delusions about it. Luckily for her Max is probably the type to feel angry but not vengeful about this lol, if only because it could reflect on her). And Max is right about that. But I love that Idelle still has it in her to take a different path by allying herself with the pirates. I’m curious about the reasoning being after Max makes Mrs. Mapleton madam again; it’s clear the girls aren’t happy about her and she didn’t seem like she took good care of them in s1, to put it mildly, so there’s some of that, but I like to think part of it was Idelle going, “seriously Max? I’m right here! I could be the Madam!” xDD.

Her dynamic with Mrs. Mapleton was really interesting too; I like how she too puts aside any old grudge and decides to put her bets with Max over Eleanor or Rogers, because she has confidence that Max and her methods (“I choose to let the players reveal themselves to me, least I make an enemy out of someone I might wish to call a friend one day”) will outlast them (btw, that line/her approach in general --as well as Silver’s “liked is a good as feared” MO--, kind of reminded me to Sansa Stark’s “If I am ever queen, I will make them love me.” line. Food for thought). Yet I think Mrs. Mapleton instructed Georgia to  attempt to ~seduce Max to get information out of her, which is very much in line with her. I loled at Max’s reaction basically being “gurl, who do you think you’re talking to. I practically invented this. GTFO” xDD

Basically, her entire storyline this season was pure gold. I love how all of those dynamics come from her maneuvers to keep herself safe, in power, and with influence (because those go hand in hand). I love her pride and her confidence, the way she refuses the scraps Eleanor and Rogers intend to give her at first (and how she firmly says to Eleanor “people do not speak to me that way anymore”, how she establishes a new normal between them), and how she pays her way out of trouble/into power with the gold she stole from Flint & co xDD.

My favourite moment of hers is devided between “in another time, in another place, they would call me a queen”, and “I AM Nassau” (that made me decide that if I ever write fic where Max needs a last name for any reason, it’s going to be Nassau. It is law), and how meta they’ll turn out to be :DD. I also have Thoughts about the evolution of her styles (beyond the obvious “omg she’s soooooo beautifuuuuul” lmao) but I’ll leave that for another show-encompassing meta too :P

Madi

She catapulted herself to Forever Fave status pretty quickly (I may have too many of those in this show.  W h a t e v e r  xDD). I love how self-assured she is (“when I speak my men listen, and they do as I say”), and how she always thinks of the big picture (like when she fought her impulse to order her men to fight against the pirates after one of them beat one of hers). And I have a lot of Feels about how this is explicitly linked to her heritage, her mother and father, their ~legacies.

Speaking of: one of the few major spoilers I seem to have avoided was that Mr. Scott was Madi’s father LOL. I was DELIGHTED by that reveal, and how it makes you reconsider his story. His relationship with Eleanor could’ve been a frankly off-putting cliché, but this completely circumvents that; it’s true that he’d shown more independence from her than I would’ve expected in another show, by leaving her side to do his own thing and further contributing to her vulnerability. But giving him a real* family, one that he prioritises over Eleanor and HID FROM HER, using her position to their benefit... That’s on a whole other level.

*I know some people are going to object to this qualifier. Fandom gets like that about found families, adopted families, etc. And I get it, but this is NOT like those situations. Mr. Scott was Eleanor’s SLAVE, FFS. That is incompatible with being her family, her father figure, no matter what she thought. And I love that the show made it explicit, when Madi tried to talk about his “two daughters” and he said “NO. ONLY YOU” in his deathbed (I might or might not have cried, okay. It may be one of my favourite scenes in the whole series). Especially when there’s a very obvious trend of characters of color COINCIDENTALLY being written as prioritizing white characters over their biological families, at the cost of their health and even their lives (I am still not over Monty being forced to kill his own mother to protect Octavia in The 100. Fuck that shit, seriously). Black Sails deciding to do the oposite here is FUCKING REVOLUTIONARY and I love it to pieces.

Another thing I loved is that they picked an actress that looks more like Mr. Scott than like her mother or Max (darker skin etc.): aka how the few black female characters that usually get what Madi will from Silver --that ~eternal devotion, willing to go against anything and anyone for her etc.-- tend to look.

Unsurprisingly, I like Madi/Silver VERY MUCH lol. I like that he is immediately ~drawn to her, in a subtle way, and viceversa (like in the scene where he’s still in the cage watching how she has trouble breathing after seeing her wounded father, or when they hug after his death). All their talks about power, responsibility, succession etc. are really good. And her concern for him is as palpable as probably inconvenient for her xD. I love the scene where she holds her hand as his leg is treated, or her worry one Silver calls himself a “one legged creature”. Though my favourite might be when he smiles when she shows concern for his state after killing Dufresne, and she’s like “well duh, if you fall apart the alliance between my people and yours is screwed” xDD

And though there hasn’t been much development yet on that side, I’m already so onboard with Flint/Madi/Silver lmfao. I love that nod of ~acknowledgment between Flint and Madi with the Maroon Queen’s voiceover about how Madi will have as much authority as Flint in his own ship xD. Her concern about Silver’s relationship with him is kind of ironic knowing that they’ll eventually find themselves more aligned between them than with Silver, by virtue of their many commonalities LOL. And there’s already traces of that ot3 feels, like when Madi tells Silver that the mistake of those “other people close to Flint” that he’s so scared of following to the grave was trying to deal with Flint alone (Madi’s seduction technique: kindness, understanding, and offers of partnership. I dig it).

I want more scenes of and with her mother, too. And between her mother and Silver, since apparently the Maroon Queen trusts him among all the pirates NOT to betray them for money (Jack saying the irony wasn’t lost on him and Flitn was hilarious xD) and that has to be thanks to Madi’s opinion of him. I’m kind of bitter we never got a Mr. Scott & Silver scene, too, especially after Silver and Madi become romantically involved. I love that stuff.

Miranda

I could just upload a bunch of gifs of various crying/in pain/etc. states here because WORDS CANNOT EXPRESS THE PAINNN. I was ~feeling Flint’s grief the entire time, I swear (though... did it have to express itself by shaving his head... asking for a friend). The violence he kept inflicting in her name (her word will be the last word); how he convinced his crew, Silver included, to go into the storm rather than surrendering, for her (and narratively speaking Silver is right, he did conjure it xDD). How fucking tired he is of it all (“you can talk your way part it”, “I don’t know that I have any more lies left in me”).

As far as I’m concerned he could be hallucinating her the rest of the show (I’m going to miss seeing her so much... especially in light of the ending), as painful as I find those scenes. At this point “But when I lost you... I am ruined over you” is an instant tear-jerker, ugh. So is Flint wantint to let go and “be with her”, and ghost!Miranda saying she’d resent him for giving up. Though my favourite is when Miranda basically describes herself as his “maker”, about how she ~shaped him *clenches fist*. I love those kinds of ships.

BTW: I think the moment Rogers mentioned Thomas, Miranda’s ghost, Flint, and I, yelled “HOW DARE YOU SAY HIS NAME” on the inside xD

Flint & Silver

Sometimes fandom gets it right because the relationship between these two is... A Lot. A LOT. I anticipate a lot of suffering on my part in the near future xD

I loved the evolution in the first half of the season, from Flint telling Silver that “in my head, you’re not welcome”, or Silver resenting that Flint’s words convinced HIM (HE’S the convincer!! It’s not supposed to happen to ME!! xDD) and rambling about how Flint is “able to ~conjure the reality he desires”, to Silver finally confessing about his part on the Urca gold robbery (which I’m at least 60% sure Flint suspected already tbh. That was not one of Silver’s best lies lbr) in order to force Flint to “account for ME” --but ofc still grabbing the nearest weapon as he confeses, just in case xDD. I am also incredibly delighted by the fact that the fandom calls that episode “shark date” asdñflkasjdf (*Flint and Silver barely manage to kill one shark*; Flint, challenging: again? *Silver grins*. Shark hunting = foreplay now, apparently).

I want it known that I end up ENRAGED every time they talk about their ~partnership lmfao. It comes off very intimate and gives me too many feelings xD. “When you and I talk with one voice, we can convince them of anything”; “your words opened that door [Flint convincing the Maroon Queen to spare their lives and join their fight]”; “you didn’t tell me the journey into the dark feels good”; “he doesn’t know how to say no to the both of us at the same time”; “I’m afraid I will be the end of you”. JUST STOP YOU ASSHOLES XDD

One of my favourite moments is when Silver convinces Flint to live. To go on, to talk to the Maroon Queen without a safeguard (that knife would’ve been his doom) and get her on their side (which Flint does with a super passionate speech about fighting England’s empire. ILH). Another is when Silver tells him he enjoyed killing Dufresne WITH HIS PROSTHETIC LEG OMFG (I personally think killing Dufresne was very valid of him lmfao), or Flint says Silver enjoyed punishing Dobbs (which in Silver fashion, worked perfectly for him because it made Dobbs MORE susceptible to him). Though obviously everything pales when compared to the scene where CAPTAIN FLINT COMES OUT TO LONG JOHN SILVER OVER A BONFIRE LMFAO. I loved that scene; it was so gentle. And then Silver made it about him and their relationship xDD (this show is not subtle). Flint’s apparent lack of concern about Silver replacing him is stressing me out though. I dread the series finale xD

Outside of Flint/Silver, Silver’s journey remains awe-inspiring. I just... love him. I love that he gave up his share of the Urca gold because he had to hold onto the crew, but that he is terrified of their bow to take care of him. His concern for his image in front of them was heartbreaking and hit waaaaay too close to home, too. And I wonder how he’s going to react to Billy’s King Long John Silver stratagem xD

BTW, I lowkey shipped him with Muldoon LOL. They should’ve had ~tender sex~~ (on screen, I headcanon it did happen off-screen, whatever) at some point (if only so there was one measly mlm sex scene in the show amidst all the rest. It’s troubling, to say the least, that there’s not a single one when it has a queer male lead tbh. And I get why they didn’t go that route with Flint outside of Thomas and can even see why they didn’t do it with Flint/Thomas even if I judge the hell out of them for it, but given how they go out of their way for the other options... yeah, I side eye them).

Jack

I LOVE HIM SO MUCH AND I WISH HE HAD MORE SCREENTIME, OKAY. Every time he opens his mouth the show gets just a little bit better, if you ask me xD. “If you’re going to behave like children, I will be your daddy” WHO SAYS THAT JACK XDD.

I loved him even more when he decided to deny Rogers & co the cache, Spanish invasion or not, to not give up and assure “his legacy”. And OF COURSE he could write his intentions in a way that only Anne would understand (Max reaaaally understimated him there). Their relationship remains the sweetest (weird adjective, maybe, but it’s true) part of the show, btw. I love that how Jack describes how hurt Anne would feel after knowing she might’ve unwittingly betrayed him. Or when he knew Anne giving up to easily meant she had a plan and he cheerfully told Rogers Anne would find a way to save him xD (the scene where he absolutely drags Rogers about his privilege --“but did I make up a lot of ground to catch you!”-- is perfect. And their reunion kiss was so, so cute.

Other highlights were when he threw away the key of the cache in front of Flint to secure it, or made his pitch to be his fellow captain in the fight. I also take a petty pleasure in the fact that Vane sacrificed himself when he went to his rescue LOL. 

I like that he convinced Blackbeard to fight alongside them, but sweetie, you have NOTHING to prove to that asshole. His opinion is worthless (between his “strife is good” and Vane’s “comfort is for women” takes... ugh. They remind me of the exact discourse among leftism I hate okay xDD. In Vane’s case I at least get where he’s coming from and I even agree in part, but Blackbeard is even more boring).

Misc

-I love Billy’s more and more insidious antagonism towards Flint lmfao (yes, Flint is also one of my Forever Faves. This is compatible AND the kind of thing that would make me appreciate Billy more. I love irreverence, period). It starts with subtle ways of trying to poison Flint and Silver’s relationship (telling Silver Flint doesn’t see him as an equal, sending Silver to deliver Flint’s message instead of Flint himself, etc.). I laughed at him saying he’s all for Flint sacrificing himself for the crew since it’d be the “first selfless thing I’ve seen him do!” lol. Or that he “wants a good view when things catch up with Flint and the world makes sense again”. And ofc, creating the legend of Long John Silver. You just know he remembered Flint’s out of left field “I AM YOUR KING” and said “not on my fucking watch” xDD. And I love the irony of him being the one delivering black spots LOL.

-Did it really took that long for Anne and Flint to share some freaking words smh. Barely, but I’ll take it. I liked the moment where Jack references Max as “Anne’s lost love” and Flint does that Closeted Queer Observing A Queer Couple Look lol (he did the same when he was witness to Max and Eleanor’s fight. You need more queer friends, Flint :P).

-I liked Mrs. Hudson from the moment that she told Eleanor that the only difference she saw between her and other ladies is that their families have better lawyer --which meant Eleanor was the first one she could be rude towards xD--, and accused her of living of her father’s nepotism LOL. I hope she ends up in a good place and safe back with her kids.

-I can’t say I care much about Vane or his relationship with Eleanor, but his death and her hand on it were very well written IMO.

-I find Rogers so inherently unlikeable in every way LMFAO. And as hypocritical as it might sound, part of it is the extramarital affair ngl. I hate storylines where a man married to a more “conventional” woman is ~attracted to one he perceives as “stronger”, “fiercer”, and more worthy of himself (as if his opinion on the matter is worth shit) --only to eventually try and make the new woman more conventional once he “has” her. This one hasn’t gone all the way there but it has traces of that trope and I loathe it with all my heart.

-The only moment I managed to pay attention to Blackbeard was when he mentioned he had shrapnel advancing towards his heart, and for anyone who knows me a little, you know it’s because my brain linked that to Tony Stark lmfao. *Sighs* I just never like any version of Blackbeard, period. I find them so boring. He’s the opposite of Long John Silver that way, because I’ve loved every single version I’ve encountered so far.

-The way Spain is portrayed in this show is so... unusual. Especially for USA content in my experience. One day I’m going to have to do some more research and write about how Spain (and in particular Spanish violence -inter and intranational) is portrayed across the ocean.

[pintofteaforthesoul]

Fenrys’s Mate OC, Nyssa

Not that anyone asked for it, but it’s an idea i’ve been bouncing around in my head for forever so here it is: Fenrys’s Mate- Nyssa. 

~~~

Rowan and Lyria’s child survived thanks to Maeve having the tribe that killed Lyria take her. (200 years prior to ToG)

Their daughters name is Nyssa.

She was raised by the tribemen until she was tent, keep under constant watch by the leader and being groomed to be his bride.

When she was 10, Maeve sent Lorcan and Gavriel to wipe out the tribe before Rowan would have a chance to- to keep Nyssa’s identity hidden.

Lorcan and Gavriel make quick work of the main tribe but it is Lorcan who discovers Nyssa- being held by the Tribe Leader with a knife to her throat.

Even then, Lorcan recognized the fire in Nyssa’s eyes and related it to Rowan.

Unbeknownst to the Tribe Leader, Nyssa carried a knife and stabbed him in the thigh with it. Free from his hold, she hunkered down while Lorcan made the killing shot.

With Rowan still away from Doranelle Gavriel and Lorcan brought Nyssa back to Maeve where she swore Lorcan and Gavriel to secrecy. She gave the task to Lorcan to train Nyssa into a warrior.

Maeve cast them from Doranelle on a “secret” mission and Nyssa grew up with Lorcan as her father.

Nyssa is the spitting image of Lyria except for her green eyes and keeps her dark hair short and curly. As a child she was small and grew up to be lithe but short. She has the barest of tipped Fae ears and smells of sweet grapes and fresh lavender (exactly like her mom). Nyssa has the ability to shift into a small calico house cat, something Maeve detests because its mostly useless in battle, and has more raw magic than any other Fae despite not knowing how to use it very well (Lorcan trained her as best he could but there were just some things he couldn’t teach).

Lorcan and Nyssa spent 30 years together before Lorcan was called back to deal with a war. While the Cadre were away for nearly a decade, Nyssa spent more time in Doranelle and became close with Connall despite his blood oath to Maeve and being forced to be her lover.

Connall believed Nyssa to be his mate and told Maeve, to which she laughed.

Nyssa believed she was to take the blood oath and finally meet her true father when they returned, but Maeve sent her on another task- her first one alone.

When Rowan returned to Doranelle, he could not figure out why Lyria’s scent was there and almost went off the rails again due to renewed grief. Those of the Cadre who knew about Nyssa and sworn to secrecy were bursting at the seams to tell him- all except Lorcan who views Nyssa as his own daughter.

Nyssa is gone for a few years but called back to Doranelle when an invasion becomes imminent. Maeve instructs her to only stay in her feline form as to not gain the notice of Rowan- with the off-hand promise that if she cooperates of her own free will for long enough, Maeve will grant her the blood oath and permission to meet Rowan.

To stop that invasion, Maeve sends Nyssa into enemy lines as a prostitute to seduce the leader of the army and slaughter him. In Maeve’s words, Nyssa does “magnificently”. This disgusts Lorcan, but he says nothing as he is still in love with Maeve.

Nyssa grows to hate Rowan, as Maeve tells her the whispers of what happened to Lyria and how it is all Rowan’s fault. She fully accepts that she never wants to meet him.

A couple decades pass as Nyssa acting as Maeve’s infiltrator, with no further mention of Nyssa swearing the blood oath, until the whisper comes that a powerful child will soon be born on Erilea (about 100 years before ToG).

Knowing the Cadre will be too suspicious, Maeve sends Nyssa- making her swear a blood promise to bring whatever child this is to her in Doranelle. Nyssa gladly accepts under the condition that should she return successful that she will be granted the blood oath. Maeve is begrudgingly vague and sends Nyssa off.

Nyssa travels to Erilea in search of this powerful child and finds utterly nothing, moving from kingdom to kingdom with little direction but mostly staying south.

During her travels, Nyssa meet Manon and they have a casual fling whenever they run across each other. Manon likes Nyssa’s stubborn and fiery spirit- and her tongue.

Fifty years into her task, Nyssa is ready to give up when she crosses the border into Terrasen. Some power tells her to remain, so Nyssa makes her way to capital where she meets Orlon.

Orlon guesses who she is and why she’s there, but is kind to her. Nyssa tells him of her story and her task to Maeve. Orlon knows it is inevitable and gives her a place in his court to wait.

Nyssa finds happiness like she has never known in Terrasen, but especially after Aelin is born. Orlon offers a blood promise to Nyssa of his own- to protect Aelin from any who should harm her. Nyssa takes it, eager to repay the kindness Orlon has showed her over the past 30 years in his court.

Nyssa takes her cat form in Aelin’s house and becomes known to the young princess as KitKat.

After the King of Adarlan’s visit and Aelin and her parents are forced back to their home outside of Orynth, Nyssa (as KitKat) is forgotten at the palace. She is not able to make it in time to save Aelin’s parents or the princess who finds herself in a river.

Nyssa vows to find Aelin again no matter what it takes, but she is trapped as KitKat after magic falls.

It takes 2 years for Nyssa to trace Aelin back to The Assassin’s Keep in Rifthold. Aelin, now Celaena, is adored at finding a calico cat that reminds her so much of KitKat. And thus names her “new cat” Snickers (not after the candy bar, but after the sound she thinks Nyssa makes)

Nyssa watches over Aelin as Snickers, never letting the girl out of her sight for long, until Celaena and Sam Cortland go to Skull’s Bay.

After the wrecking of the city, Nyssa is found by Rolfe who identifies her as Aelin’s beloved cat. Thinking to have something over the assassin, Rolfe keeps Nyssa- completely unaware of the Fae girl.

Nyssa, as Snickers, gains the favor of everyone in Skull’s Bay while trying to figure out a plan to escape. She soon learns that not long after Celaena left, she was sent off to Endovier.

Nyssa is distraught at the news, knowing she is useless in her current form and now stuck in Skull’s Bay.

Nyssa hears everything of Rolfe’s business, since he believes her to be just a cat. After hearing that Aelin is alive, she bides her time until the young Queen settles in one spot- set on returning to her side even in her useless feline form. When magic is once again released, Nyssa begins to formulate a plan as to how to reach Aelin.

Cut to the events of Empire of Storms. Nyssa is shocked when some of the Cadre appear in Skull’s Bay. Fearing the wrath of Maeve for breaking her blood promise to bring Aelin to her, Nyssa hides any way she can.

When Rowan appears, it takes all of Nyssa’s self-control to not reveal herself- still hating him for what happened to Lyria. But she knows that if Rowan is here then Aelin will follow.

Indeed after Aelin shows up, Nyssa bides her time for the best moment to reveal herself.

Unfortunately, Gavriel catches her scent and he and Fenrys track her down as a cat.

Fenrys, as a wolf, carries Nyssa, as a cat, in his mouth to where Aelin has set up shop in the inn. Fenrys drops Nyssa in a chair but she does not shift.

Aelin is delighted to see Snickers again, but Rowan stops her from approaching- his face twisting at Nyssa’s scent.

Rowan orders Nyssa to reveal herself while Fenrys and Gavriel take up their places at the door, Aedion off to the side. Aelin tells Rowan to shove it, not believing that her childhood pet could be a Fae in disguise but Rowan just has his eyes on Nyssa.

Nyssa shifts, not once looking at Rowan (whose breath catches when he sees her) and addresses Aelin.

Aelin is shocked, but not terribly surprised by the reveal- piecing together that Snickers and KitKat are one and the same.

After a little coaxing, Nyssa tells her story, barely flicking eyes to Rowan except when she describes being taken by the Tribesmen. Rowan grows paler over the course of the story. Fenrys, not having met Nyssa before now, calls out how poetic the moment is (since Gavriel had just found out about Aedion).

Aelin asks about the blood promise to Maeve, but Nyssa swears that it is gone because she already broke it and thus poses no threat. Rowan tries to talk to Nyssa, to which she replies nastily and flippant.

Taking advantage of being in human form again and that it’s late, Nyssa stalks off- taking Fenrys with her to both piss off her dad and to give her a place to sleep for the night.

Unbeknownst to them, Nyssa and Fenrys are mates. It’s why she and Connall had had such a close relationship but never took that next step.

Nyssa and Fenrys have a very loud night together. Rowan talks to Aelin about being horrified and she helps him through it.

Nyssa grows close to Lysandra and Aelin again, but not Aedion as she hates the way he treats Gavriel. Aedion calls her a hypocrite since he believes her to be acting the same towards Rowan. Nyssa tells him to fuck off and shouts that at least Aedion had gotten the chance to know his mother before she died.

Nyssa helps in the Battle at Skull’s Bay, delighting in the fact that Dorian also has raw magic. They learn off of one another.

When Manon appears in the sky, both Nyssa and Dorian are the ones to save her though Nyssa is reluctant to explain her relationship to the witch.

Nyssa, in feline form, guards Manon day and night while also discovering more of her relationship with Fenrys.

Nyssa and Rowan have a scene on the deck of the boat, where she screams at him for abandoning Lyria. It cause Rowan’s grief to surge and Nyssa chokes down the rest of her anger after realizing just how deeply Rowan cared for her and Lyria. Rowan vows that had he known of her existence he would’ve fought to the ends of the Earth to find her. Nyssa does not reveal that it was Lorcan who raised her despite Rowan’s repeatedly asking which member of the cadre it was.

When Manon wakes to full consciousness, she is relieved to find Nyssa there. At some point they have a small scene where they tease Fenrys who was on guard duty at the time by Manon pleasing Nyssa. Fenrys gets territorial and calls for a shift change, taking Nyssa back to his cabin to stake his claim on her. They still have no idea that they’re mates.

Despite knowing each other for nearly a century, Manon and Nyssa have no deep feelings for one another and Nyssa is not surprised when Manon takes a liking to Dorian. She jokes with Manon that it must be the raw magic Nyssa and Dorian have in common that makes them so irresistible. Manon brushes it off.

After that point, Nyssa is only with Fenrys.

When they trek into the stone marshes, Nyssa goes along. But when the ilken attack, Nyssa senses Lorcan’s presence and throws all of her magic into bolstering his shield.

When Lorcan appears, and Gavriel and Fenrys disappear, Nyssa tries to go for him. Much to Rowan’s horror, she addresses him as her father.

Fenrys and Gavriel attack and Nyssa is physically restrained by Aedion, much to her great displeasure and rage. Nyssa screams for Fenrys to stop. Elide gets hurt by Fenrys, Lorcan puts the shield over them both and the talking ensues.

When the battle resumes, Nyssa uses the last of her magic to blast Aedion back and races toward Lorcan. She jumps in front of Fenrys without fully knowing that he’ll stop before hurting his mate.

Lorcan rages at Nyssa to get away, which prompts Rowan to step in and declare Lorcan and Elide under Aelin’s protection.

Lorcan greets Nyssa by grabbing her hair and growling that if she ever tries that again, he’ll kill her himself. Nyssa nearly cries with relief and Lorcan embraces her tightly. Rowan addresses Lorcan stiffly and they all make their way back to shore.

Before they move, Nyssa draws her blade to Aedion’s neck and threatens that if he ever holds her back again that he’s dead.

Nyssa joyfully fills Lorcan and Elide in on her adventures, already reading the mating bond between Lorcan and Elide. She ignores Fenrys entirely. Elide loves Nyssa immediately.

Rowan and Lorcan have a discussion about Nyssa when they return to the boats, filling in the side of the story Nyssa could not. Rowan is displeased, but ultimately understands.

Fenrys tries to talk to Nyssa but she slaps him.

After the arrival of Maeve’s armada, Nyssa is one of the guards put on Elide. She accepts the order from Lorcan without question, vowing to protect the girl with her life.

When Maeve comes to take Elide, Nyssa manages to kill two of the guards before being grappled. Maeve is displeased to see her and Nyssa is horrified to see the Dark Queen in person again. Maeve simply states that they’ll have to talk later and calls Fenrys and Gavriel to her side.

Knowing it will be too late once they do, Nyssa makes an attempt to get to Elide. She slices the guard’s throat who has her and makes a running leap, but Fenrys appears and grapples her now. At the same time, Lorcan now has Elide. Maeve gives the order for them to all freeze and not run away.

Maeve reveals all about Aelin and Rowan and Nyssa cries in disbelief, now understanding that Maeve hadn’t sent her to Erilea because she was the least suspicious option but because Maeve delighted in knowing that Lyria’s daughter would be the one to protect Rowan’s true mate.

Nyssa attempts to fight out of Fenrys’s grip, to which Maeve instructs Fenrys to bite his mate- to claim her. Because of the blood vow, he does. Maeve tells Nyssa how disappointed she is and that they will discuss later about the punishment for breaking her promise. Maeve uses her darkness to render Nyssa unconscious, much to the horror of both Fenrys and Lorcan.

Nyssa is not conscious through Aelin’s lashings by Cairn and Fenrys is ordered to take her aboard the ship.

When they arrive back in Doranelle, Maeve has Nyssa beaten while she still has no magic- making both Connall and Fenrys watch.

Maeve delights in revealing that Fenrys and Nyssa are mates and Connall grows angry, still having believed that it was him. It’s another thing he holds against Fenrys.

Maeve ponders Nyssa’s usefulness as a tie between the twins and makes a show of deciding who Nyssa will be with. Nyssa is exhausted and broken, her wounds healing slowly.

Maeve reveals that this isn’t the full punishment for breaking the promise and Connall offers himself up to take the punishment in Nyssa’s stead.

Maeve merely laughs and states that she has a better idea. She uses the blood oath to make Fenrys hold Nyssa down while Connall carves into her back with his magic- the world Oathbreaker in the Old Language over and over again down Nyssa’s spine.  Both brothers are horrified, but have no other choice and the word is branded into Nyssa.

Only then, Maeve reveals that the punishment has been paid and gives Nyssa the chance again to swear fealty- finally offering her the blood oath because her Cadre’s numbers have dwindled with the loss of both Gavriel and Lorcan. She also tells Nyssa that should she accept, Nyssa will have the choice of whose bed she will take- Connall or Fenrys.

Nyssa, seeing no other choice, takes the blood oath to Maeve, but uses the last remnant of her magic to burn the blood away before it can enter her system.

Going back on her word, Maeve uses her magic to twist Nyssa’s mind- making her believe Connall to be her true mate despite the blood oath. When Maeve then offers up the choice between them and Nyssa chooses Connall. Fenrys is practically a statue at this point. Maeve then orders the couple to make love every dusk and every dawn, the blood oath taking effect on Connall but Nyssa knows if she is to refuse then she would reveal what she’d done.

Maeve then considers how entertaining it would be to make Fenrys watch the couple, but reconsiders and orders him to stay in wolf form to watch over their new “guest”.

>to be continued after I read more of KoA<

[mollymauk-teafleak]

“I’ll do anything you want me to do to you, but you have to say it out loud.” for the new Widomauk circus au?

So this didn’t end up going where I thought it was going? But I love it

When he watched Mollymauk perform, every single time, no matter how many shows and towns and months went by, Caleb found himself falling in love with him all over again.

It was in the way he moved, the way he strode around the small, sawdust scattered circlet as if he owned it, which of course he did. His hands would move like birds, flitting this way and that, sweeping and dancing to illustrate his words while his tail flicked and snapped to punctuate his gestures. He would leap from floor to the artfully arranged boxes that separated the audience and the stage, drawing them in, blurring the line between the awed huddle of townsfolk and the show itself.

It was in the way he dressed. He’d have his perpetually present hat, tall and grand and unselfconscious, with the holes in the side for his bedazzled horns to break free from. His badge of office, he could sweep it off to bow low to a pretty lady in the audience, or toss it from hand to hand as he told a joke, or hold it out to draw small pieces of gold foil from to scatter across the stage or else cleverly written, spiky limericks about the audience members. But it would always return to his head, leaving absolutely no doubt as to who or what he was. His coat was the other essential part of the costume, swirling and billowing with every movement he made, like an extension of his body, as much part of his performance as the words. The lights caught in the gilded thread work that made up the elaborate scenes entwining on its wine purple surface, bringing the garment into its own kind of life.

It was in the way he spoke, the way he commanded words so effortlessly and confidently. Nothing fazed him, like the whole tent could come down around him, be devoured by flames, and Mollymauk could turn it into part of his act. He was a showman, beyond a shadow of a doubt.

And, more than anything, it was in the way he sang. That was always how the show closed out, Mollymauk would make his final entrance with his lyre under one arm, the highly polished wood shining a rich honey gold in the light, the strings frighteningly delicate like spiderwebs. But Molly would draw from them the most beautiful music, his voice sweet and full to bursting, like he and the instrument were one and the same. After a few bars, the audience would be weeping and Caleb would be madly, dizzyingly in love.

The applause of the audience was muffled from a thunder to a rumble as the heavy curtains swept closed behind Mollymauk. Grinning wildly, he flew into Caleb’s waiting arms, letting the wizard spin him around and around until they were both light-headed and breathless. The high after each show was a funny thing, reducing most of the troupe, all seasoned and professional performers, to giggling children.

“You were incredible!” Caleb grins, in almost the exact same heartbeat as Molly said, “You did amazing!”

The wizard chuckled bashfully, “What did I do? You’re the star, I’m just the arcanist.”

Mollymauk looked scandalised, “But you’re the best arcanist! That shower of sparks you made, there were so many different colours I couldn’t believe it, I nearly forgot my lines!”

Caleb’s face flamed red and he pressed it to the crook of his husband’s neck, “You never forget your lines…”

“I did say nearly,” Molly points out, pressing a kiss to the side of his head.

Caleb had to allow himself a moment of pride. After nearly a year with the troupe, he had been getting a lot better at his job. He no longer spent the whole show in a half blind panic, checking and rechecking where he was supposed to be and when until Yasha grew so irritated with him that she stuck the call sheet to his forehead with resin that took a week to fully peel off. Now it was as natural as breathing, he moved through the wings and under the raised seats right below the audience themselves without ever being seen, throwing out fire and sparks and coloured, scented smokes whenever the script called for it. The delighted gasps and startled yelps that arose from the crowds made him smile.

When he’d been with Ikithon, magic had been a privilege, something he was only ever allowed the briefest tastes of, something that was dangled before him like a lure and shrouded in layers of rules and regulations with severe punishments for its improper use. Now Caleb could delight in magic. He could use it for the smallest things, just to make people smile or save himself a few seconds. It was his, it was part of him. He could love it.

Just another thing Mollymauk had given him.

Feeling bold, Caleb kissed the softer skin under Molly’s jaw, letting it linger for a few seconds longer than he had to.

“Want to head back home?” he murmured, lips only drawing back a hair’s breadth before kissing him again.

Molly’s eyes sparked with interest, “We should help with packing everything down…” he murmured, teasingly.

Understanding immediately what his lover wanted, Caleb gave his best pout, pressing his body against Mollymauk’s and letting hand wander around to the nape of Molly’s neck where the tighter, more sensitive curls were plastered to his skin by the sweat of a full three hour performance under the bright lights, playing with them idly, “Surely they don’t need the ringmaster for that? Your job is done. I was hoping we could go back to the wagon and…celebrate a job well done?”

Caleb was far from experienced in flirting but he knew exactly how to seduce tall, purple tiefling ringmasters with painted lips and too much glitter in their hair that would stay on their shared pillows for weeks. He was rewarded with a deeper blush of colour on Mollymauk’s already flushed cheeks and a spark of interest in his dark eyes.

Caleb could relish using magic for the small things. Like for locking the door to his and Mollymauk’s shared wagon after pulling an already half-dressed tiefling inside.

Home would seem to most like an intangible, unattainable thing, when said by someone who spent their whole life on the move. But Caleb and Molly knew exactly where and what home was. It was in their ancient, listing, beautifully painted caravan, stuffed to the brim with coloured glass orbs holding eternal dancing lights, woven blankets from all corners of the realm, an old but dependable cookstove, bright brass cups and sugar glass bottles both empty and full, more books than most libraries and a hundred other oddities gathered on their travels.

And, most importantly, a surprisingly comfortable slatted bed with deep blue sheets and just enough room for two. It was this that caught the two men as they rolled and kissed, hands roving all over each other as they clumsily dispensed with clothes.

Caleb was already painfully hard by the time they were both naked and Molly’s fingers closing around him drew a longing hiss from between his teeth.

“Molly…” he whimpered pleadingly, burying his face against the tiefling’s neck.

“Ah ah,” Molly wrapped his legs around him and whispered in his ear, “I’ll do anything you want me to do to you. But you have to say it out loud.”

The urge to whine for everything under the sun was powerful but Caleb swallowed hard and forced himself to think. He rolled back so Molly was on top now, looking up at him longingly.

“I want the toy…the cherry wood one…”

Molly grinned, looking positively wicked in the low light of the lamps which had obediently dimmed at Caleb’s command. He pressed a lazy finger to his lover’s freckled nose.

“Close. But not enough, try again.”

Caleb whined, squirming, “I…gods, Molly…I want you to fuck me. With the cherry wood cock you had made back in Rexantrum. The big one.”

When Molly kissed his forehead, he knew he’d done well and relief washed over him, cooling against his burning cheeks. It only took the tiefling a few moments to tease their toybox from its secret place under the bed and retrieve the toy but the absence of his body against Caleb’s was maddening.

One slender, heavily tattooed leg rested on the bedframe so he could work the bulbed end of the toy into himself, not exactly an easy task given its size. Caleb eased the experience by wrapping himself around said leg and pressing kisses to the inside of his lover’s thighs until Molly was laughing and swatting at him, informing him that his beard was tickly.

There was no non-awkward way to fetch anything in the tiny interior of the caravan; Molly had to stand on the bed and reach over Caleb to grab the tiny bottle of lube they kept up there though Caleb wasn’t about to complain at the view he got.

It really was a fantastically beautiful sex toy. The dark, slick oiled wood looked incredible against Molly’s skin and he wore it so confidently. The heavy, inviting curve of it, buried between his lover’s thighs, just made Caleb whine all the more.

Molly made note of that, flashing him a grin and singing happily, “On your belly, handsome.”

Caleb obeyed, happy to sprawl lazily in the vast, downy embrace of the bed while Molly positioned himself behind him and began to work him open with a sprightly slap of his ass and two fingers dripping thick oil that smelled of winter spice.

“That’s enough,” Caleb murmured thickly after a minute or so of those careful, precise fingers sliding in and out, running along his rim.

Molly raised an eyebrow quizzically, “You sure?”

“Uh huh. I like it when it still bites a little.”

With an impressed chuckle, Molly turned him over so he could see his lover’s face, pressing a kiss to both of his cheeks before throwing his long legs over his shoulders. The toy nudged at Caleb’s entrance teasingly, making his muscles flutter expectantly and a wide pit of longing to open low in his stomach.

“Please fuck me,” he growled out, before Mollymauk could even ask, “Please. Gods, Molly, I need you in me.”

“My good boy,” he sounded even more impressed, “You’re learning.”

The first thrust into him had the edge of pain Caleb had wanted, just enough to make his toes curl and his eyes roll back a little. Then it was as easy as anything, sinking into the slow, steady rhythm of Mollymauk’s hips that built so gradually, almost in perfect beat with how Caleb’s heartbeat began to race.

He didn’t care that he was being loud, loud enough that there would be pointed looks when they joined the rest of the troupe the next morning nor that the caravan was creaking its disapproval as it rocked like it was caught in a storm. Mollymauk earned every single cry and gasp and curse that rolled from his lips ten times over. A full show’s worth of desire and want, all of those times he’d fallen in love with him again, crashing together inside him as Molly’s hips jackhammered back and forth and his lips gave searing kisses all over Caleb’s chest.

Caleb sucked in a sharp breath, unsure if he’d get the chance to warn Molly before he came. Whether he did or he didn’t, it turned out not to matter as a sudden crack echoed through the tiny space and the whole damn world tilted on its axis. There was a crash and a rattling ruckus as everything in the caravan slid, clattered and resettled. It was only a second but it was so sudden and loud, it was like an impossible to follow eternity. By the end of it, Mollymauk was upside down against the wall and Caleb had more aches and pains than he thought it was possible to have.

There was a long, stunned silence.

“Um…” Caleb squeaked, “I think one of the supports snapped…”

Molly gave a long, almost minute long sigh, tail flopping down against gravity across his own face with a dull slap.

“Did you at least get there?” he finally asked, voice flat.

“I…have absolutely no idea.”

The next day, upon surveying the damage, Beau would insist it was karma for them skipping out on helping to pack down after the show. Caleb was inclined to agree.

[darlingpetao3]

Seducing the Gem (Nash Wells x Reader, Chapter 8/9)

Rating: M (Smut in Chapter 6 only)

Summary: When a mysterious package shows up at your front door, you (a famous Romance novelist) are hurtled from your virtually uneventful life and into one of danger and adventure. In a quest to save your captured friend Caitlin from impending harm, you run into a suave adventurer named Nash who helps you along the way. Or is the charming Nash simply after something in your possession…?

Tag List: @tardis-23​ @thecaptainsgingersnap​ @the-marvelatic​ @itsprongs​

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5 | Chapter 6 | Chapter 7

Walking (well, maybe more so stumbling) into the hotel feels surreal. You were meant to be here days ago. Poor Caitlin… You just hope she remains unharmed.

The woman at the front desk hands you the key to your room, which you are now thanking your lucky stars you reserved for multiple days just in case. The room itself is the most basic one the hotel has to offer and you have no qualms whatsoever. It’s a thousand times better than a broken down van.

Immediately, you locate the room’s phone and dig out the number Caitlin gave you to call. This is it. You’re getting your friend back.

“Good afternoon,” greets a smug male voice on the other end.

“Is she alright?” you ask desperately. “Have you hurt her?”

“So, you finally made it.” The voice deflects your question. “Took you long enough. Did you bring the GPS?”

“Yes, I brought it, but I want to speak with Caitlin.”

“I’m afraid I can’t arrange that until I get the goods,” the stranger counters. He sounds like a man with a constant smirk. The kind you would love to smack off his face for what he’s done. “Now, look out the window. You’ll see a barge. Meet me there in two hours. And make sure you’re alone, got it?”

You hang up without so much as an “okay.” You are a ball of stress, worry, and anger. Picking up the hotel phone again, you call the front desk downstairs.

“Hi, I’m just wondering if a man named Nash Wells has checked in at all today?” you ask tentatively.

“No, I’m sorry. No one with this name has checked in.”

Damn.

“Alright, thank you.”

You hang up and speedily clack your fingers on the desk as if that will help rid you of your anxiety. Great, only two hours to let myself go completely insane. Just what I needed.

~

Night has already begun to fall.

You clutch your bag that holds the holographic map in it a little tighter and wander closer towards the docks. You’re so on edge that any small movement or sound throws you off. The kidnapper didn’t give you any direct address, so it was down to your basic sense of direction at this point.

“Over here,” eventually comes a voice from the shadows - the one from the phone call.

You take a few careful steps forward. “Where are you?”

“Don’t move any closer,” they order you. “Show me the GPS.”

“Let me see Caitlin,” you counter.

At long last, you lay eyes on your friend - Caitlin moves out from around the corner looking unkempt, but unharmed. What a relief!

“(Y/N)!”

“Caitlin, it’s going to be okay!” you assure her. Cautiously, you begin to pull out the piece of tech and hold it out in front of you, despite still being unable to see where the man’s voice is coming from.

“Set it down and back away.”

You do as the stranger says. After a beat, he finally reveals himself - a tall man with a buzzcut wearing a trenchcoat. An odd choice of attire for freaking Africa. The man moves towards the device, picking it up to inspect it. He presses the power button, which brings up the illuminated hologram map. He studies it.

The man gives you a sideways smile, then shoves Caitlin into you.

“Better late than never, I guess.”

You hold onto Caitlin for dear life in a long-overdue hug.

“Cait,” you cradle the back of her head, then pull away to search her eyes. “They didn’t hurt you, did they? Because I swear-”

“No, I’m okay,” she assures you, “I promise.”

“Good, then let’s get out of here.” The pair of you probably only make it ten steps away from the drop when you stop in your tracks at the sight in front of you.

Nash appears under the warm light of the streetlamp on the corner.

Your breath is positively stolen from you.

“I missed you at the hotel,” Nash says. “I missed you in general.”

He did come for you.

It’s at this moment that armed men emerge from the shadows to force Nash forward with the tip of their guns. He’d been caught… Then, as if the icing on a grotesque cake, Wade steps into view.

“I should have known you’d be at the end of this wild goose chase, Snart,” Wade says, effectively ignoring you for the time being.

“Eiling? Dammit, you let the government follow you here!” Snart pins on you. Excuse me?

“Cool it, Ice Man. They already have the gemstone,” Wade informs the criminal. Shit. You were hoping to get away without this Snart fellow finding out. A series of growls grow louder as Mick Rory struggles while bound among a pair of additional army men.

“I had it in my hands, Len,” Mick tells his partner. “So beautiful. The colour of fire… And now I feel like a cookout-!”

The pyromaniac fires up his flame-gun but is instantly disarmed. Mick roars in frustration.

Amidst the chaos, Wade turns his narrowed eyes to you. It still feels as if this is all some insane dream or scene you’ve written while drunk on your hot chocolate.

“What is it, Missy?” he asks you. “Got something to share with the class? Where is it?”

Nash squints at you - a signal.

“What, the stone?” you play dumb. “We never found anything. The spot was empty.”

“Nice try. Why don’t we see if our little friend can shake the truth out of you?” Wade and his weapon-toting entourage lead you, Caitlin, Nash, and the Fire and Ice gang into one of the warehouses running parallel with the water. There’s a loud rustling in the darkness, followed by heavy breathing. It isn’t until someone switches on the shoddy lights in the room that you spot it - a cage holding an enormous gorilla and her baby.

The mother ape shakes the metal bars and screams, only to have Wade laugh at her failure. He taunts the poor creatures, and when you show the slightest bit of discomfort, the general pushes you closer and closer to the cage.

The ape roars in your face, or maybe it’s directed at Wade’s, so vehemently that her saliva ends up on your face.

Remain. Calm.

“Let her go, okay? Enough!” Nash raises his voice. “I have it. I have the stone.”

“Tell me where!” Wade demands, still clutching you forcefully.

“It’s in a safe place.”

“Out with it, Wells!”

The gorilla bellows in her cage once again at the commotion between the humans. Wade cues a gesture to one of his men, who proceeds to hit Nash in the nether region with the butt of his rifle. There’s a clunk sound.

You don’t remember him having a literal… ahem of steel.

Nash tries to recover, but something is off. He shakes his leg and wiggles around a bit as if he’s performing some bizarre dance. But soon enough, you all witness it - the gem falls out the leg of his pants and onto the ground.

The room goes silent.

“I promise I was still extremely happy to see you, Princess,” the adventurer jokes.

You snort loudly, despite the time and place.

And then, all hell breaks loose.

Nash kicks the stone over to an open space for you to launch after it, but Wade beats you to it. With the gleaming red beauty in his hand, all other sides in this battle seem to have lost. But suddenly, the mother gorilla violently grasps the general’s arm and yanks it around, causing him to drop his precious treasure.

Gunshots are everywhere, mostly used as a scare tactic, you decipher. Out of the corner of your eye, you see the baby gorilla manages to squeeze out through the cage’s bars and picks up the stone in his hands. It doesn’t take long for him to take off outside, and you know you can’t just let him get away.

“Nash, hold them off!” you tell your partner, who at once removes a gun tucked away behind him.

“As you wish, Princess!”

You make a break for it, following the ape with Caitlin in tow (she is not leaving your side ever again). He’s a quick little fella, even as he scuttles up the back stairs of the building leading to the roof. By the time you reach the top, you’re a smidge out of breath, but find the animal on the ledge opposite you.

Step by step, you slowly make your way towards him. His tiny black eyes watch you the whole time, that is, until you make it a foot away from him. In which case, they dart behind you. You turn warily, finding that damned bastard Wade, forcing Caitlin and now yourself even closer to the ledge than you’d intended.

“We can do this the easy way, or the hard way,” he says pointing his gun at you.

“Or we can do it my way,” you counter as a bluff. Think fast.

Wade fires a shot into the air. A startled Caitlin slips on the edge in confusion.

“NO!” You let out as a horrified yell, watching her fall over the side. However, a speedy swoosh of flames flies downwards at an incredible speed. Caitlin’s screams stop, and you don’t want to look.

What was that?!

You aren’t able to question it too long, though, because Wade has you in his terrifying grasp once more.

“Let go of me,” you growl, trying to wrench your arm free. There’s a screech, and the next thing you know, the young gorilla scrambles up your captor’s leg and chomps on his hand.

“Aaarrrghh!” Wade recoils and backs off a safe distance, clutching his wound. “You little shit.” The creature laughs and climbs to sit on your shoulder in a protective action.

A bright glow illuminates from behind - and you scrunch up your eyes to get a better look at what seems to be hovering with Caitlin in its arms. It looks like… a man? A burning man?

This phenomenal being releases your friend with a familiar gentleness. Oh my God, it can’t be...

“I thought I killed you!” Wade shouts at the burning man.

“You thought wrong,” he replies.

“I won’t make the same mistake.” He raises his gun, and you can see his finger begin to press the trigger, but a bulldozer of black fur barrels in his direction from the rooftop entrance. Mama Gorilla, in all her loud ferocity, jumps on and disarms Wade. The wild animal shakes him around like a G.I. Joe action figure, and ultimately jumps across to the next building’s roof. And the next. And the next, until eventually they’re both out of sight.

Everyone remains speechless.

The one to break the silence is Nash, who now sprints up the stairs onto the roof, bolting towards you. His hands find your arm and waist.

“Are you okay?” he checks.

“I’m okay. You?”

Nash exhales. “Still here.”

You maybe only have a brief moment to collect your thoughts and relax before Caitlin shrieks, setting you to red alert again. You whip your head in her direction to find the man who was previously in flames splitting into two people.

“Ronnie!” Caitlin exclaims, throwing her arms around her fiancé’s neck. It really is him…?

“Ronnie? How are you alive?” you ask, dumbfounded.

“Martin?” Nash says warily to the other bespectacled, white-haired man who has seemingly appeared out of thin air. The two hug it out happily.

“It’s all thanks to Professor Stein,” Ronnie explains. “Remember that highly classified internship I took, Cait?” Your friend nods slowly in response, also obviously stunned by this nearly impossible scene. “It was an experiment-

“-Fusion, Ignition, Research Experiment and Science of Transmutation Originating RNA and Molecular Structures,” Martin Stein clarifies for you all.

“And I was a match.”

“But why did you send me the GPS?” you ask him the question that had been eating away at you since the beginning of this whole crazed debacle.

“Because Professor Stein needed to hide it, and the government was already hot on our trail with the F.I.R.E.S.T.O.R.M. experiment, which wasn’t exactly given the go-ahead. But I mean, can you imagine the US military getting their hands on the means to locate highly dangerous gemstones with mystical powers?”

You file that premise away in your mind for potential novel material.

“It hasn’t been the first time the government has stolen my work from me,” Martin adds bitterly.

“But I knew it would be safe with you, (Y/N),” Ronnie continues. “We couldn’t have it falling into the wrong hands.” It’s wild to believe that one piece of mail could change your life forever.

“But Ronnie,” Caitlin speaks up, still verging on joyful tears, “I thought you were dead. They told me you were dead.”

“We had to make it seem that way, Caity. I’m so, so sorry.” The couple shares another tender embrace.

“In the meantime, however,” Martin says, turning to Nash, “as we assumed our false demise, Ronald and I nearly finished the Trans-Dimensional Navigation System.”

“You’re… you’re serious?” Nash laughs like he can’t believe his ears. Truly ecstatic. You wonder what this means.

“Yes. We just need the final elemental piece of dark matter found within the gem’s ore for the project to be fully operational. Did you find what you were looking for out here?”

“I found more,” Nash says, turning to you. You blush fiercely. The roof falls quiet.

“Alright… well, we’re all here, we’re all okay,” you confirm. “So- wait. Where’s the little guy? He had the gem last. Where’d he go?”

As if he heard you, the baby gorilla calls out from down below. Each one of you rushes to the building’s edge to peer down - the ape bounces up and down on a boat motoring away. A flash red reflects off the moonlit water. Two sets of men’s laughter fade into the night.

“Quick, go inside him and fly over there!” you tell the fiery duo.

“Oh, Princess, you had to have heard that one,” Nash bumps playfully into your side. The two men attempt their merge, but nothing happens. Ronnie and Martin glance at each other, then try again.

Nothing.

“Why isn’t this working?” Ronnie wonders aloud.

“I’m embarrassed to say I can’t think of a probable theory as to why…” Martin replies. He doesn’t strike you as a man who is often confused. The more time they take to keep attempting to merge, the further the gorilla sails away on the getaway boat.

“I can’t see the boat anymore,” you note at the solid blackness of the water.

“I’ll find him,” Nash announces. He takes you by the waist so suddenly, your hand presses to his chest to steady yourself. “I’ll find him and the stone, and I’ll come back for you.” Your breath is momentarily caught in your throat.

“How can I be sure you will?” You bite your lip, trying not to tie all your hopes to this wild man.

“Because our adventures together are far from over.”

Despite his words, Nash kisses you like it’s the last time he’ll ever see you again. Deep, firm, and lingering. You wish it would linger forever on your lips.

As he unholsters his grappling hook gun, he gives you one last brush of his fingers against your cheek. You want to tell him something bubbling up inside you, but before you can decide whether or not you should, Nash shoots you a wink and zip lines down to the ground to commandeer a stray boat.

You stay on that roof until after your adventurer is no longer in sight.

You stay on that roof until after the sound of the motor is gone.

You stay on that roof until you admit to yourself that you’ve fallen head over heels in love with an extraordinary, fearless, flying-by-the-seat-of-his-pants man.

This kind of love doesn’t just happen in the pages of your novels anymore.

You’re living it.

[rorykillmore]

what would villanelle do if she had to visit a wedding she wasnt really excited for. what kind of shenanigans would she get up to. escapism

god this is a powerful question.

villanelle would find weddings SO. cheesy. like, in general, unless they were like, really insane themed weddings or something. don’t get me wrong, she’s a hopeless romantic in... her own way, but the reciting of vows and ceremonial stuff would bore her so much. the whole “if anyone has any objections to this union, speak now or forever hold your piece” thing would be a dangerous statement to make in a very bored villanelle’s presence, so first of all just delete THAT entirely from the proceedings.

(why do traditional weddings even still have that part, anyway? like, what kind of asshole is going to wait until the day of the wedding. to OBJECT. villanelle, that’s who)

assuming it’s not a scenario where she’s just there to be someone’s plus one to save them from feeling awkward -- which, regardless of the chaos it’s inviting, she’s the person i feel like many of the people who know her on denny would go to for that. villanelle’s a lot of things. but it’s hard to feel socially anxious around her. -- then first of all, we have to assume that villanelle’s first priority for attending a wedding at all is finding someone to hook up with. so most of her energy would go towards seducing the prettiest bridesmaid over the course of the night, and probably doing something to fuck it up the next day and causing immense drama for everyone to deal with in the fallout.

and while she can hold her liquour, but she doesn’t really like to drink excessively anyway, so she wouldn’t be super big on that scene herself, i feel like she’d be highly entertained by just watching OTHER people get drunk. she’s the person who would take the opportunity to weasel the embarrassing family secrets out of the nearest wasted aunt, or like, who takes an excruciating video of Cousin Timothy drunkenly making an ass of himself on the dance floor and then posting it on facebook the next day

i also feel like villanelle would be the person to like. somehow get involved in a weird scandal. like being the one to accidentally find out the bride is having an affair with the best man, or tracking down the groom and beating him up because he stood up the bride and never showed up. though of course both of those things assume villanelle is attending a heterosexual wedding, and if she’s doing that, SOMEONE had better be paying her

god.... Wedding Drama would be so funny to do as like, a plot. do you think anyone on denny would ever actually get married in the foreseeable future?? i don’t know if any of our current ships are likely to veer towards that for a variety of reasons, but if they ever do, well. don’t say i didnt warn you.

[unsent-voicemail]

[Part 1] It’s James. (Bodyguard!Bucky x Female!Reader)

It’s James.

Don’t forget it, doll, because it’ll be the only name you’ll be screaming the whole night.

tw’s: sex, language, alcohol, drugs, au setting

Tag list: @sofipatey​ @bloodiedskirtts​

* inspired from an ask from @papi-chulo-bucky * comments/feedback are appreciated

Loud music and sweaty young adults pathetically grinding against each other was certainly not former Secret Services Director Bucky Barnes’ scene, yet he found himself stood in London’s trendiest club, killing his boredom by nursing his already-watered down whiskey as he watched the princess knock back shot after shot of tequila in between lines of cocaine.

He couldn’t blame her for acting the way she did, given that her family literally had the money to support her lifestyle of booze, blow, and boys. Shit, if he had the same luxuries and privileges she had, he wouldn’t think twice to splurge it all on bad decisions, knowing that dear old father can afford to pay an accomplished bodyguard to pick up after him, anyway.

However, he definitely placed the blame on her when it came to her irrationality and lack of common sense– she was sent to the most prestigious, top-notch private schools, for crying out loud! More often than not, she had carelessly placed herself in precarious positions that would require him to handle the situation as if he were back in the Secret Service.

Show-off, she’d chide, playfully sticking out her tongue and coyly running her fingers up his arm as if she just didn’t escape an attempted kidnapping incident.

Tease, he would mentally reply as he stealthily took note of how her crop top and mini-skirt rode up after all the struggling, showing off a little more of her curves and legs that could rival that of a goddess’.

~

Upon hearing a shrill, familiar scream that cracked through the loud music, Bucky was quick to snap out of his buzzed reverie and whipped his head towards her direction. Narrowing his eyes to see through the cigarette smoke and dim lighting, he took note of her fragile form was entrapped in the strong arms of her male friend, who was leaning towards her face with puckered lips despite her protests and attempts to shove him off. “Here we go again.” the brunette bodyguard muttered with a sigh as he knocked back the rest of his drink before haphazardly placing it on the table nearest to him and pushing his way through the crowd to make his way to her.

“Get the fuck off me, you…” she slurred as she backed up further, swearing she could break her spine with how much she was bending backwards just to get that asshole out of her face. “You stupid jerk!” she screeched, lifting a hand to land a hard smack on his cheek, only to have her intoxication get the best of her as it ended up as a weak pat on his face, causing him to chuckle and have his disgusting whiskey breath attack her nostrils. She wanted to cry out for her bodyguard to swoop in and save her like he always does, but her tongue went numb as her thought process stuttered, causing her to completely forget what name to call out.

Chuckling, her assailant muttered a “cute” before licking his lips and leaning in further to capture her luscious lips in his. Faster than he could say “kiss me”, however, he felt a powerful force crash into his temple, forcing him to let go of the irresistible woman as he hit the floor, immediately falling unconscious. With droopy eyes and a loose tongue, the woman pointed an accusatory finger at his still form, opening her mouth to give him a piece of her heavily intoxicated mind. Before she could even utter a syllable, however, she was yanked away by the waist by her bodyguard, who wasted no time in getting her out of the packed club and ushering her into the limousine her brother had bought her for that night.

~

“Jared.” she called out softly as she lifted up a stiletto-clad foot to poke at his knee, breaking the tense, awkward silence between them. “Jaaaaaareeeeed.” her voice was louder and her nudge was harder, as if to demand him to look at her. Thankfully, the partition of the limousine was up, allowing her to extend her leg as far as she wanted to without caring about the driver getting a little peek up her hiked-up skirt.

“It’s James.” Bucky breathed out, evidently bothered by the fact that she didn’t get his name for the nth time– drunk or not, she always managed to call him some stupid ass name that was a far cry from his real one. Furrowing his eyebrows, he tried to focus on the Sudoku game on his phone instead of the piss-drunk brat who had no qualms with making his job harder than it already was. I love my job, I love my job, I love my job, he mentally chanted, trying to ignore the woman’s incessant kicking and whining, choosing to focus on the next move he was going to make.

“Well, Justin.” she spat out crassly, as if his name was a cuss word. "Thank youuu for saving meee.“ she cooed drunkenly, though the sincerity was evident in her voice.

Scooting over to the stoic brunette, she wrapped her arms around his shoulders before placing a sloppy kiss on his scruffy cheek, staining his skin with her lip gloss. Giggling childishly at the mark she left, she brought up a perfectly manicured fingernail to trace over it, making Bucky roll his eyes so far back he swore he got a peek of his brain in an attempt to calm his racing heart and heat that was starting to rush to his groin.

Silently, he removed her arms from his shoulders and gingerly placed them on her lap before returning his attention to the puzzle game. Pouting at how cruelly he rejected her, the girl merely huffed out a “fine” before crossing her arms and scooting far away from him, glaring out the window with a dejectedly angry expression plastered on her perfectly made-up face. Her sulking didn’t last long, however, as she soon found herself coyly peeking over to him once she noticed that he made no further attempt to pay attention to her. She watched him move his thick fingers across the electronic device, gulping as she envisioned his digits skimming up her thigh before disappearing under her skirt, eventually moving to trail along her underwear–

“We’re here.” the man of her fantasies called out gruffly, pocketing his phone and exiting the car, briskly jogging over to her side of the vehicle before she could react. Chivalrously opening the door, he extended a supporting hand like he always did whenever he accompanied her to one of her extravagant shopping trips or excessive booze binges. “I said: we’re here, princess.” he called out once more, hoping she’d note the impatient sarcasm in his voice, and that she’d be decent enough to exit the car properly; he’d be damned if he got another flash of her show-stopping legs.

This time, however, instead of holding onto his hand for support like she always did, she laced her lithe fingers through his tightly, using all of the strength she had left to pull him back into the limousine before slamming the door shut.

“What are you doing?” the ever-so stoic James Buchanan Barnes had finally broke, raising his voice in bewilderment and confusion for the first time in years as she pushed him back into the vehicle’s leather seats, wasting no time in straddling him, deliberately placing her scantily clad heat above his hardening member. “This is– oh, God. No. No, no.” he muttered, trying his best to get her off, although the lack of strength in his arms and the tent that was starting to form in his slacks screamed the opposite.

“Don’t you want me, Jacob?” she pouted and fluttered her lashes in mock innocence, hoping that it’ll seduce him into loosening up and removing the robotic bodyguard mask he always had on. She knew that he didn’t think highly of her when it came to what was in her head, but she would rather keep in that way: appearing oblivious to the lascivious stares he’d given whenever she wore an outfit that exquisitely showed off her best assets, or to the intense heat she felt when she’d press her body a little more against his suit-and-tie clad one as she maneuvered her way through a crowd. “Everyone wants me.” her hot breath fanned his ear, while her hands skimmed up and down his crisp, white polo shirt, relishing the feel of lean muscle tensing under her touch.

Even in a heavily intoxicated state, she was so conceited and full of herself, but she was damn right– everybody, Bucky included, wanted her so badly that it hurt. What hurt more than the lust he felt for her, however, was the ache coursing through his temples and forehead as he tried his best to think with the head he had above his shoulders.

Bucky has never ever attempted to have a relationship with anyone professionally linked to him, but at that moment, with her peppering open-mouthed kisses along his neck and jawline that left delicious electric shocks from the ends of his hair to the tips of his toes, it seemed like he wouldn’t mind starting now.

[minaminokyoko]

Favourite avengers movies scenes?

How on earth do you expect me to ever narrow down enough to not list the entire trilogy in general? Holy hell. I am a big fat Marvel fangirl and I could write a fucking dissertation on scenes complete with charts and graphs. For the sake of argument, let me see if I can at the very least just highlight the tippy top favorite moments from the first three Avengers films. Keep in mind, I fucking love all three of them to death and could rave about them for days at a time.

The Avengers

-Loki’s confrontation with Nick Fury. This scene sets the tone for the rest of the film so fucking well, man. It’s just brilliantly done to see that whatever humanity that we saw in Loki in Thor has pretty much flown out the window and he’s here to wreak havoc and start a war, and he doesn’t care how many people he destroys in the process. I also like that it shows the vast gap in power and experience between the SHIELD agents and an Asgardian. Loki all but flattens everyone in a matter of seconds. Seeing him among other Asgardians can kind of make you forget he’s literally a thousand year old god and is tough as nails. He’s also low down and ruthless and that’s the kind of thing that is scary as hell when you realize that’s what they’re all up against.

-Nat’s “interrogation” with the Russians. I actually love every single Avenger’s introduction scene, but this one is so delightful in that Nat shows us just why she is an Avenger even though she has no enhanced abilities: deception, manipulation, and just being an incredibly agile combat expert. I am most delighted with her scene because before Avengers, I had no regard for Nat at all and thought she was just fanservice, but here, she completely proved her worth as a character and to the team, and I got on board as a fan of her just from her opening scene wiping the floor with these idiot Russian dudes.

-Tony and Bruce getting to know each other in the lab. From a character standpoint, this is an outstanding scene. Tony is trying to draw Bruce out of his shell, and the sympathy and empathy he has for him is so palpable that it’s why we all dubbed them the Science Bros and why it’s one of the best friendships in the Avengers. Tony is so awesome for joking with Bruce and treating him like a normal person and reminding him that there is at least one person aboard that helicarrier who doesn’t see him as some terrifying monster and knows just from reading up on him that he’s not a bad person. It’s so charming and wonderful.

-Stuttgart. Man. Man, oh man, this is a well done scene. The build up to Loki’s horrifying actions is so great and so is this freaking diva’s grandstanding once he demands the poor, confused Germans kneel before him. It’s fascinating to me because Loki has an almost childlike need for attention, as if his frustrations with his failure to take over Asgard as king has manifested itself into this very basic need to be acknowledged as being a powerful threat. Loki could kill an average human being with a flick of his wrist. His comparison of “an ant has no quarrel with a boot” while cruel is accurate, but here’s the thing, Loki: if you fuck with enough fucking ants, you can get your ass into a lot of trouble, and we’re fireants, not sugar ants, buddy. And ants who band together get shit done. The old man who stood up to him, in my book, is a fucking hero all on his own and I think it’s one of the most well crafted pieces of dialogue in the entire MCU. “There are no men like me.” “There are always men like you.” Oh, standing ovation for that piece of dialogue. Give it an Oscar. Then Cap swinging in to kick ass and Tony swooping in beside him with an equally over the top entrance to Loki’s was the icing on the fucking cake.

-Thor retrieving Loki. Hnnnnnnngh, okay, so here’s the thing: I fucking love Thor and Loki’s relationship even before Ragnarok came out and upgraded it. Thor is and always has been since his first movie a man with very deep emotions who loves and loves deeply with all his heart, and his confrontation with Loki just wounds me so much. How Thor throws Loki to the ground and yet yanks him to his feet and just holds him there, his hand on his face, looking so torn between agony and relief that his brother is alive. “I thought you dead.” “Did you mourn?” Fuck me, this scene is absolutely brutal to my feels. Thor and Loki’s debate was nothing short of excellent as Thor tries to bring Loki around, and the thing is, he means it. He means every fucking word, that he would take the Tesseract and bring his brother home, and he doesn’t care about facing the music, he just wants his goddamn brother back even after all Loki has done so far in the story. Y’all better stop sleeping on Thor, man. His heart is by far the best thing about him, forget all the delicious muscles and that perfect teddy bear smile. Thor has miles and miles of heart, and that’s why I love this scene so much. 

-Nat tricking Loki into revealing his plan. This scene is so good I based an entire goddamn fanfic around its premise. Dude. Nat fucking Romanov, y’all. I love how this scene is staged and executed. I love Loki starting out almost gentle and conversational, as if for once he’s going to just be an actual person and not a monster, and then he slips back into that nasty egotistical megalomaniac when he thinks he has one over on Nat. And then Nat fucking schools him. It’s why I have a personal headcanon that he developed a hatecrush on her after she, a mere mortal, tricked the goddamn God of Mischief. It solidified Nat as one of my favorite female heroes forever. I loved seeing her use that feminine “weakness” to let him run his mouth. I also love that his cruel words did in fact affect her and motivated her even more to both save Clint and to go to war with Loki at the end.

-The whole ass helicarrier attack sequence. I mean, I don’t even need to go into detail. You already know. 

-Tony confronting Loki. This is the scene that assured us that what followed would be one of the greatest fight sequences in cinematic history. I pretty much have most of Tony’s dialogue memorized because it had such an effective impact on me from a storytelling standpoint. Tony standing up to Loki as a mortal man with no suit, candidly threatening him with barely suppressed rage that Loki murdered Coulson, a comrade, in cold blood, is downright amazing.

-The battle of New York. Boom. Again, no words necessary. Perfect fucking sequence from start to finish.

-Thor trying one last damn time to bring Loki around. Oh, my heart. My poor fucking heart. Thor really loves his brother and he would do anything to have him back. Is it naive? Yes. But it’s also a beautiful statement of what family truly means to Thor and it breaks my heart. The fact that a tear slides down Loki’s face when he stabs Thor and mutters, “Sentiment” is so not cool. As much as Loki pretends to be the Big Bad Wolf, there is something still young and human inside of him even though he pretends it isn’t there. All my creys.

-Hulk trouncing Loki. I went and saw The Avengers three times in theaters, and two out of the three times, everyone cheered so loud I didn’t hear the Hulk say “puny god” over all the noise. It was that satisfying a scene.

Age of Ultron

-The entire beginning sequence. Fucking loved it. What masterful ass-kicking and showcasing of the team dynamic. It made me want a longer lead in to how they all got reunited because it was so enjoyable. “Language!” Oh, Cap.

-Jarvis and Ultron’s first scene together. Dude. James fuckin’ Spader, man. I never knew I could be so intimidated by a man’s voice. It was so unsettling for so many reasons, the resentment, irrationality, and anger from his unusual birth and creation. It was all the more frightening when he turned on Jarvis, and at the time, we didn’t know he hadn’t killed our beloved butler. 

-Picking up Mjolnir. This scene needs no elaboration. It’s just perfection. Even people who complain about Age of Ultron admit this scene is just flawless.

-The team confronting Tony over creating Ultron. Cap’s line, which we now know goes even further after the events of Infinity War, just make me want to die. “We’ll lose.” “Then we’ll do that together, too.” Tony’s face, realizing that Cap doesn’t care that he fucked up–he cares that Tony couldn’t trust the team enough to let them in on what he was dealing with–is soul-crushing. Tony realizes he was wrong to assume instead of being honest with them. 

-The confrontation in Wakanda. Everything about it was badass and it hits you right where you live seeing the Avengers having to face their biggest regrets and most painful moments of their pasts. Especially Steve’s. The image of him and Peggy finally getting their dance was so not okay. Special props to Tony in the Hulkbuster armor. That was one hell of a fucking brawl.

-The Sokovia final battle. There are just so many awesome points in the final battle sequence, man. Everyone is out there just kicking ass and doing what they do best. Special props to Hawkeye getting through to Wanda, and Hawkeye’s “nobody would know…nobody” moment with Pietro. 

Infinity War

Disclaimer: I have no idea how to isolate moments in a movie that is by far one of the most well written comic book movies since The Dark Knight, but I guess since you asked, I have to try anyway. Hoo boy. Strap in. 

-Loki’s death. Let me explain something to you: I went entire years without caring about Loki, and then around the time The Dark World came out, I slowly became converted to both a Tom Hiddleston and a Loki fan, and then after Ragnarok, he finally just seduced me completely to being smitten with his stupid trashy self. It is important that you realize that I recognize that Loki is a selfish, inferiority complex-having, murdering bastard and I do not excuse a goddamn thing he does because of his fucking Daddy issues. That being said, in spite of how much of a flaming trashbag he is, I love him anyway, and I tried for months to tell myself that I knew as a fellow writer that Loki was going to die in Infinity War. It was assured not only from the trailer, but from me knowing that his character arc was always going to end with his death. What hurt most of all is that, as I predicted, Loki died trying to save Thor. I cried my eyes out. Hell, once Thanos closed his hand around Loki’s neck, I covered my eyes because I just didn’t have it in me to see it end this way for him and for Thor. Thor being helpless to stop it is truly what made it worse. There is nothing on heaven or earth Thor wouldn’t do for Loki, even knowing how wicked Loki is. And the fact that Loki couldn’t let Thanos kill Thor after all these two have been through was like an icepick through my heart. Loki wouldn’t have died protecting Thor if Thor had not loved him unconditionally this entire time we’ve watched their story. Thor’s love did have an effect on Loki throughout these films, and that’s why I literally burst into sobs and couldn’t bear to see him die that way. It is one of the most gut wrenching things ever put to film, and certainly in the MCU. I’ve only had the stomach to watch that scene twice because it hurts me so much, and neither time was I strong enough to actually watch Loki’s final moments. Goddamn, it’s just so painful. Capped off with Thor slowly crawling over to his brother to be with him one last time before the ship explodes and just laying his head on his chest in the kind of grief that honestly should get Hemsworth a fucking Oscar. Bravo. 

-Cap, Widow, and Falcon reuniting with Vision and Wanda. Holy shit, yes. This fight was gorgeous, gripping, and fucking awesome. Special props to Cap and Widow being the ride or die Avengers Mom and Dad team. We can infer from their actions that the two of them have been together since the end of Civil War possibly, so you can not tell me Cap and Widow are not a thing on some level. Captasha all day, err day. They perfectly compliment each other and I headcanon that they’re together and no one will convince me otherwise.

-”We’ll fight you too.”/”We don’t trade lives.” That sound you hear is me screeching. Some people have said Cap wasn’t given a ton to do this time around, and I emphatically protest it simply because, yes, he has less screentime, but man, he does so much work in this role that reminds us of why we all love Captain America. His values mean so much. Cap will lay down his life in the blink of an eye for someone who needs it. He cares so deeply. He is the pinnacle of selflessness and it’s so important to see in this film.

-Thor meeting the Guardians. Perfection. Just…perfection.

-Irondad and Spiderson aboard the Space Donut. Jesus fucking Christ, I am so on board for Irondad and Spiderson that it’s insane. I love that entire fucking interaction from start to finish. I love Tony’s strict, fatherly anger and exasperation because he just wants his baby boy to be safe on earth while he’s on another suicide mission, but the baby boy wants to help his dad out and baby boy also doesn’t quite realize the consequences because he’s too young. Extra points for Tony’s death-glare after Parker says, “It’s kind of your fault I’m here” and the fact that even the fucking cloak did a double take at Parker when he said it. Oh, it’s so perfect.

-Gamora making Peter promise to kill her if Thanos gets to her. I just…I want to die. This was so beautifully done, and so in character for both of them, and Peter and Gamora are just so soft and sweet and in love that it’s so overwhelming. At the very least, I take a small comfort in knowing that they were a happy family for four years before this shit happened to them.

-Gamora “killing” Thanos. Again, can we just award Oscars to like half the fucking cast in this movie? Jesus Christ, I cried at this scene too because the fact that she’s just completely unraveled as she finally thinks she’s killed her goddamn abuser is so deeply tragic. Gamora is my favorite Guardian. Hands down. She is so three dimensional. She tries so hard and she is so much more than the deadliest woman in the galaxy. She is so complex and it is the worst pain ever to know that Peter actually kept his promise and tried to kill her to prevent her from being in the hands of her abuser again and Thanos foiled their plan, and had the fucking nerve to say, “I like him” before he took her again. 

-”It’ll kill you.” “Only if I die.” “…yes, that’s what killing you means.” 

-The battle of Wakanda. Motherfucker. This is some A+++ motherfucking good shit hurr. What always gets me hype as hell is Cap and T’Challa sprinting down the goddamn hill at 80 mph and I just can’t even handle that shit because it was so good and satisfying. Everything about this battle was incredible.

-The battle on Titan. Same thing. It’s so creative and well crafted and amazing. You feel every blow. You flinch. You want them to beat that son of a bitch but he’s just so fucking strong. It is an incredibly engaging fight, man. Hoo boy. 

-Thor’s entrance to the battle of Wakanda. I distinctly remember the entire audience going absolutely apeshit during this scene the night Infinity War premiered. Like the first Avengers, I saw it three times in theaters, and two out of the three times, the crowd went fucking wild. That was so fucking satisfying, man, as are the neat little scenes of levity with Cap introducing himself to Groot and Cap and Thor remarking on each other’s changes in appearance. It was so pure and good and perfect.      

-Cap squaring up with Thanos. I. Can’t. Breathe. It was so powerful. Like the above scene of “we don’t trade lives,” this is why we love Captain America. Why we love Steve Rogers. This man, this mortal human man, took one goddamn fucking look at that twelve foot all powerful alien giant and said, “Not today, bitch.” Steve fucking Rogers stood there and took it. He put his life on the goddamn line for Wanda, and for Vision, and for the rest of the universe, and he actually held that goddamn line for a moment. The incredulous look on Thanos’ face is what seals it. He is utterly confused that this little man is actually holding him back, that this mere mortal doesn’t give a fuck that he can’t overpower him, but he is giving it his all because that is who he is. Steve will not quit. Steve will not falter. Steve will die doing what’s right and that is one of the most moving things in the whole MCU, imo. He just planted his feet and said, “No, you move.” I know we saw that scene in the trailer, but it was so unbelievable to see it in context that Cap gave it everything he had trying to protect Wanda and the rest of the universe, and I still get choked up just thinking about that shit. 

Welp, you asked for it and now you have it. I told you I was gonna rave, man. God bless anyone who actually read this nonsense. Marvel had me at hello with these characters and they have way too much sway over my emotions, as you can see above. Ten years, man. Ten years. 

[forcebaby732]

Why Didn’t You Kill Me, Part 6

“Where are you going?”

Rey calls out, but she gets no response as Kylo Ren retreats to his personal ship.

Along the way he summons his saber which comes soaring over the cliff it was kicked over. His body is rejuvenated but he’s never felt so weak.

He punches the button to recall the ramp, slamming the door in Rey’s face as she had once done to him.

Outside, a thoroughly confused Rey, huffs, hands on her hips. What in the world?

She’s carrying her pack that Ben left behind in the cave.

Rey sits cross-legged before the shuttle and her stomach rumbles. She figures, she may as well take the time to eat and think, pulling rations and water from a compartment in the bag.

Rey can tell that Ben is running away from what happened, whatever that was, fleeing from her like he did when she first breached his mind on star killer base. She gets comfortable. She’ll wait for him to emerge, saying a prayer that he doesn’t just blast off right here and now without her.

…

The day had started well enough for Kylo Ren.

He had awakened first.

A deeply curious and intellectual creature, he had poured through those texts, their pages ancient and delicate. The dialect was difficult to decipher but was similar enough to his teachings at the Jedi academy that he could power through it.

He devoured its contents, surprised that the original intent of the mastery of the force, was more open and complete than what it would become. The emphasis was on the whole… the light and the dark embraced together…

It only reinforced what he already knew to be true. It solidified his stance that the Sith, and the Jedi, and the rebels all needed to die…

Speaking of rebels… he was sure the beautiful but battered quasi-Jedi laying beside him would survive. He could feel her heart beating. That she was not dead was an intense testament to her power. He marveled at her strength, admired the vicious grit she had shown in her defiance of Snoke, in slaying the Praetorian guards, in defying him…

He frowned and looked back at the books.

She didn’t deserve his good will. Not after declining to rule the galaxy with him. After abandoning him, too weak and sentimental to slay him, leaving him in a position of power he never wanted for himself alone…

When she woke he reveled in her delirious and surprisingly loud thoughts. She was too injured to realize she was telegraphing some pretty interesting intel – that he knew she’d never admit to with her full faculties about her.

He let it swell his ego, but he knew they had important things to accomplish if he didn’t want to have to murder her. He chose to ignore it and get them back on track.

He had not anticipated what would happen with the healing technique he learned about… but he was desperate.

Not only had it healed their physical wounds, but it had given her unfettered access to every painful memory that had wounded his soul and poisoned his heart. Before he realized it... she was already inside...then there was the flash of light. He was flooded, left so drained and weak that he nearly drowned. 

Kylo Ren grasps a console with shaking hands. The memories that were once the source of his powerful rage felt dulled… not only that…it felt like a black veil had been pulled back from his eyes. He was suddenly awash with memories -- repressed and twisted memories that were now clear -- painfully clear, unbearably pure, heart-wretchingly unaltered.

Not only did he recall his parents’ worried whispers, but Han’s piloting lessons, Han ruffling his hair in pride... not only his violent outbursts, but his mother holding him after his tantrums, soothing him, promising to always love him… IT HURTS TOO MUCH!!

Everything he had hidden away in little compartments in his mind were raw and wretched open.

What had she done to him? He gasped as rare tears fell from his eyes. He couldn’t do this, he had to focus on something else.

He pings the com in his ear. “Hux!” Comes his high, trembling voice. He schools himself quickly. “Hux, report.”

If he hadn’t been so distracted, he would have noticed Hux’s nervous reply,  “Supreme leader, a moment, yes, Supreme Leader, how may I serve you?”

“Give me a full report. What requires my attention?”

Hux dives into their latest movements in a number of military pushes, most systems are turning themselves over while others have put up a fight. Hux sends action reports to Ren’s data pad. The Attendants want to talk about the next phase of their domination plans. Repairs on the Supremacy and all its on board industries are on schedule…

“And the rebellion?”

“An insignificant rabble who all systems are refusing to aid. Latest intelligence is that they’ve made contact with Bespin. The system is being monitored. If they arrive, they’ll be destroyed”

There’s a strange pang in Kylo’s chest.

Hux adds gingerly, “Is there progress in your… negotiations?” 

Before he can think up a response, Ren simply ends the transmission. Time was running out, he was sure the cunning Hux was using this unsupervised time to some devilish end… he needed to return and command with authority…but he was feeling anything but powerful right now.

----

Hux breathes a sigh of relief. 

Behind him stands a collection of fellow generals - including a dozen in holo-displays. They have just finished watching the records from the elevator. The tender whispers between their Supreme Leader and the wretched scavenger Rey had elicited some satisfying gasps from the gathered military leaders. And not only that!

Some very interesting news was gleamed from Snoke’s personal records.

Kylo Ren, Master of the Knights of Ren and Supreme Leader of the First Order... had one other very surprising secret title.

Ben...Solo... son of Rebellion General Leia Organa. The same Leia who had escaped thanks to her son’s supposed incompetence on Crait... or was he actually protecting them?

The generals are convinced and have signed off on a plan to end this unnatural reign in the most palatable, marketable way possible. A triumphant cruel grin plays across Hux’s thin lips.

“Thank you kind gentlemen for your courage and action in this most grave matter. We’ll move the destroyers away. Bring in the black-ops with the weapon.”

---

On board his shuttle, Kylo Ren has emerged from his refresher, donning a clean black tunic, his arm bands and a new, non-tattered pair of leather pants. The scalding hot water has done little to clear his head.

He’s moving out into the small sitting area when he hears it...

Mechanical breathing somewhere behind him.

He spins around but it’s gone.

Then it’s there again...and the faint cry of Anakin.

Ren spins again, “Who’s there?”

In the corner of his eye he sees a blue haze...a wizened old man in Jedi robes stands before him with an ethereal glow around him.

Kylo takes a step back, his eyes wide in shock. His mind races but he knows what this must be. He’s heard enough of Luke’s stories to know that this has to be a force ghost.

“Who are you?”

“An old friend of your grandfather. And your name sake, apparently,” the old man says warmly with a smile.

“Kenobi...” Ben whispers.

“Yes, we’ve been trying to reach you Ben. But it wasn’t until young Rey purged the darkest blockages in your soul, that we were able to get through.”

“What do you want dead Jedi?”

This brings an ethereal chuckle from Obi-wan.

“You’re a stubborn boy. Yet clever. Full of fearsome vengeance, yet that hero’s heart inside of you refuses to die. The force rages in you heir of Skywalker. I’m here to help.”

Ben scoffs, absorbing what he’s hearing but keeping his emotions even.

“I have no need for the dried up wisdom of a dead hypocrite. Thanks to me, you’ll all be ghosts soon.”

Obi-wan considers this and seemingly takes a seat on a black bench.

“Hmm,” he says rubbing his beard, “is that why you were performing a rebirth ritual with a very naked Jedi lady friend just a short time ago.”

Ben sputters angrily...”What?”

“Well the technique is also called rebirth, but then, you knew that. Just pretended you didn’t quite read that part correctly, isn’t that right?”

Ben can’t respond. His mind goes blank.

“There is little time Ben, but there is something you need to know. There is a force you possess that both the Jedi and the Sith tried to suppress, it is this power that brings balance to the force, time and time again in it’s own messy way. You and young Rey have the power to make all things right, and teach a new generation of Jedi about this path. A new... order if you will. Does that sound about right?”

“Spit it out old man, say your piece and be gone!” Ben shouts..

Obi-wan shows him instead. Ben is suddenly catapulted into a memory.

A young man, tall, dark and handsome like himself stands before a beautiful and heavily pregnant woman on a platform above a volcanic planet. He watches the scene play out.

“...I won’t lose you like I lost my mother...”

“...Anakin, all I want is your love...”

“...I’m becoming more powerful than any Jedi has ever dreamed and I’m doing it for you, to protect you...”

“...come away with me, leave this all behind...”

“...together you and I can rule the galaxy, make things the way we want them to be...”

“...Anakin you’re breaking my heart...”

Then another person emerges, accusations are made, he’s strangling the young wife he had just sworn to protect, dropping her and their unborn children to the metal floor.

Ben finds himself kneeling, gasping at the scene before him. Then it’s gone.

“Anakin’s fear of losing Padme twisted his heart, seduced him to seek power, until his love no longer mattered anymore, and he gave himself over to the Sith.”

“You’re mother and uncle were born but their mother died, just as Anakin had foreseen. Only, it was by his own hand.”

“Why are you showing me this?” Ben demands.

“So, you can understand. Love destroyed the Jedi order, it also destroyed the empire when Darth Vader chose to save his son and kill the Emperor. Both the Jedi and the Sith rejected the sentiment, but it’s power is far greater than either order can contain.”

Ben was feeling sick.

“Why isn’t my grandfather here?” He demands, changing the subject.

“He is... in a way. Certain energies, tools of the force, tend to return to the physical world when it is thrown off balance. But it’s so difficult as flesh and blood, so easy to get lost...”

“What are you saying?!”

“Rey *IS* Anakin. Anakin *is* Rey, and you need to help her.”

Stunned silence follows. Ben hears nothing but his beating heart.

“This is a joke…”

“Yoda isn’t here, so, sadly, no.”

More silence as Kylo tries to grasp the absurd things that are being said.

“You tried to help her then too “ ... Ben is shown a vision of Padme, pleading for Anakin to open up to her, “This time, the force has made you equals.”

“I will not listen to Jedi lies.”

“Think on it young one. For now, you have to hurry, there’s not much time, you must flee…”

“Why?”

“Above the planet, reach out and see what your general is doing. You must act quickly and decisively, it comes down to you now, Ben.”

Then a wisp of something floats between them. Ben thinks he sees A scoundrel’s smile, smells a musty scent, feels the pressure of a hand on his shoulder.

Han’s voice, “I’m here son.”

Tears he doesn’t realize are streaming down his face. Ben reaches out with his feelings and indeed, they are about to befall a major “accident” at the hands of Hux. They must escape… TOGETHER… NOW!

The ghosts vanish.

He lights his saber and hacks at a console beside him, this time with purpose.

---

Rey jumps as the ramp opens.

She stands and brushes off her pants, only to feel herself flying towards the shuttle. She’s too caught off guard to react. She soars up, landing with a thud against Ben’s rock hard chest. He secures her with a large arm around her waist, as he chucks broken electronics down below with the force.

“We have to go.”

“Ben!?”

And she’s being slung over his shoulder. He uses the force to hit the button to lift the ramp and jogs with a highly confused would-be jedi to the cockpit, “What the hell… Ben, what’s going on??“ She kicks and reaches down, pinching him hard on the ass!

“OW! CRAZY WOMAN!”

“Put me down!”

He dumps her into a co-pilots chair and begins a launch sequence.

“For the love of… what the kriff is going on Ben Solo? Where are you taking me? Do I have to kill you? Is this another kidnapping?”

“Shut up and prime the hyperdrive or we’re going to die.”

Wide-eyed she looks at him just a moment before deciding this is a real threat. She starts throwing switches as he lifts off… and that’s when she’s sees it… a blinding red streak of energy heading for their location.

“Force help us.”

“Good idea,” Ben says as he punches the thrusters.

Fire and chunks of earth rattle their shuttle, flames licking over their viewport. They’re just about to be overwhelmed when he sends them into lightspeed. They don’t appear as so much as a blip on the First Order scanners.

----

A sweating, nervous Hux stands over his officers, “Did we get them?”

“No life forms detected sir. The shuttle’s beacon is at the center of the blast. There’s no way they could have gotten off world. Targets eliminated sir!”

“Yes!” Hux pulls in his fists allowing himself a triumphant display that is certainly below his station.

He straightens his uniform and walks back off the bridge, where the Attendants are waiting with a golden cloak. They throw it over his narrow shoulders.

----

They’re spinning through space.

Blue and white lights streak past them. They stare at each other panting for a long time.

She’s the first to break the spell.

“Why did they try to kill us?”

“A coup. Looks like you’ll get the chance to help me kill Hux afterall.”

He seems to be taking being unseated as Supreme Leader rather well.

“Won’t they track us?”

“I dumped the tracker and comms. They should think we’re dead.“ 

“Just like that? How can they do this to their own leader… How did you know it was coming?”

This he doesn’t answer, shielding his mind from hers.

There was his trusty anger building again. He relished it after feeling so drained by the events of the spring. It was all her fault, he hadn’t agreed to help her yet, hadn’t decided if he’d keep her alive, those damn ghosts couldn’t control his destiny. But he supposed he was alive because of them… they were alive… for now.

Like it or not, if he wanted his position of power back, he was going to need Rey’s help and this time, he would ensure that she'd never leave his side again.

He knows where they need to start.

“You’ll need a new saber…”

“What?”

“If we’re going to bring the First Order down.”

----

ON Ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13990587/chapters/32535867

-----

Part 1: http://bit.ly/2IdHDTN

Part 2: http://bit.ly/2Ie5q5G

Part 3: http://bit.ly/2oVTDRD

Part 4: http://bit.ly/2HztYF7

Part 5: https://bit.ly/2G8K7RP

Part 7: https://bit.ly/2upJMJa

Part 8: https://bit.ly/2JbkYaW

Part 9: https://bit.ly/2GZFflF

Part 10: https://bit.ly/2HnC9FF

Part 11: https://bit.ly/2HucNsb

Part 12: https://bit.ly/2vt5sED

Part 13: https://bit.ly/2HvMiDH

Part 14: https://bit.ly/2KxOWGN

Part 15: https://bit.ly/2Kt5r6l

Part 16: https://bit.ly/2x5QLYR

[trinuviel]

A Night at the Opera: Rigoletto (Copenhagen 2017)

Last year I had the good fortune to see a production of Verdi’s famous opera Rigoletto at the Royal Danish Opera in Copenhagen that was nothing short of pure genius!

It was a truly amazing production that used the stage-setting and direction to really challenge the story critically, inviting for the audience to read the story against the grain by opening up a subtle narrative space for the creation of counter-stories. 

It addressed some of the darker aspects of the story, especially in regard to the relationship between Rigoletto and his daughter Gilda - aspects that relates to gender and sexuality. I was immensely pleased by this since these are aspects of the story that I’ve always found very troubling. Furthermore, the way that Gilda decides to sacrifice her life to save her unfaithful lover has never sat right with me - so it was great to experience a production that engaged critically with these particular aspects of the story.

Historical Background

Rigoletto is an opera created by the renowned Italian composer Guiseppe Verdi and it is based on the play Le roi s’amuse from 1832 by the French author Victor Hugo. The play takes place in Paris in the early 1500s and features the libertine renaissance king Francois I. The protagonist is the court jester Triboulet who encourages the king in his vices.

In his preface to the play, the author notes that Triboulet "hates the king because he is king; hates the nobles because they are nobles and hates men because they don't all have a hump-back... he corrupts the king and brutalizes him, urging him on to tyranny, ignorance and vice, dragging him through the gentlemen's families, pointing out a woman to seduce, a sister to kidnap, a girl to dishonour...". (x)

The play was considered a thinly veiled attack on King Louis-Phillipe and was banned after just one performance. 

In 1850 Verdi was commissioned by to write an opera for La Fenice in Venice. Verdi chose Victor Hugo’s controversial play to adapt into an opera because of the grand, tragic subject and the character of Triboulet. However, it was a controversial choice and he got into trouble with the Austrian Board of Censors (Austria had control over Northern Italy at the time). Verdi and his librettist reworked the story with significant changes. The story was now set in Mantua, the king was made into a duke and the hunchbacked jester was renamed Rigoletto. The opera premiered in Februrary 1851 and has since become one of Verdi’s most famous and beloved operas.

The Story

ACT 1

Scene 1: A room in the palace of Duke of Mantua

At a ball in his palace, the Duke sings of a life of pleasure with as many women as possible. He has seen an unknown beauty in church and desires to possess her, but he also wishes to seduce the Countess of Ceprano. Rigoletto, the Duke's hunchbacked court jester, mocks the husbands of the ladies to whom the Duke is paying attention, including the Count Ceprano, and advises the Duke to get rid of him by prison or death. The Duke laughs indulgently, but Ceprano is not amused. 

Marullo, one of the guests at the ball, informs the courtiers that Rigoletto has a "lover", which astonishes them. The courtiers resolve to take vengeance on Rigoletto for making fun of them. The festivities are interrupted by the arrival of the elderly Count Monterone, whose daughter the Duke had seduced. Rigoletto provokes him further by making fun of his helplessness to avenge his daughter's honor. Monterone confronts the Duke, and is immediately arrested by the Duke's guards. Before being led off to prison, Monterone curses Rigoletto for having mocked his righteous anger. The curse terrifies Rigoletto, who believes the popular superstition that an old man's curse has real power.

(Count Monterone curses Rigoletto)

Scene 2: A street, with the courtyard of Rigoletto's house

Preoccupied with the old man's curse, Rigoletto approaches his house and is accosted by the assassin Sparafucile, who walks up to him and offers his services. Rigoletto declines for the moment, but leaves open the possibility of hiring Sparafucile later, should the need arise. Sparafucile wanders off, after repeating his own name a few times. Rigoletto contemplates the similarities between the two of them; Sparafucile kills men with his sword, and Rigoletto uses "a tongue of malice" to stab his victims. 

Rigoletto opens a door in the wall and returns home to his daughter Gilda. They greet each other warmly. Rigoletto has been concealing his daughter from the Duke and the rest of the city, and she does not know her father's occupation. Since he has forbidden her to appear in public, she has been nowhere except to church and does not even know her own father's name.

When Rigoletto has gone, the Duke appears and overhears Gilda confess to her nurse Giovanna that she feels guilty for not having told her father about a young man she had met at the church. She says that she fell in love with him, but that she would love him even more if he were a student and poor. As she declares her love, the Duke enters, overjoyed. Gilda, alarmed, calls for Giovanna, unaware that the Duke had sent her away. Pretending to be a student, the Duke convinces Gilda of his love. When she asks for his name, he hesitantly calls himself Gualtier Maldè. Hearing sounds and fearing that her father has returned, Gilda sends the Duke away after they quickly trade vows of love. Alone, Gilda meditates on her love for the Duke, whom she believes is a student: "Gualtier Maldè!... Caro nome" ("Dearest name").

Later, Rigoletto returns, while the hostile courtiers outside the walled garden (believing Gilda to be the jester's mistress, unaware she is his daughter) get ready to abduct the helpless girl. They tell Rigoletto that they are actually abducting the Countess Ceprano. He sees that they are masked and asks for a mask for himself; while they are tying the mask onto his face, they also blindfold him. Blindfolded and deceived, he holds the ladder steady while they climb up to Gilda's room.

(The courtiers abduct Gilda)

With her father's unknowing assistance Gilda is carried away by the courtiers. Left alone, Rigoletto removes his mask and blindfold, and realizes that it was in fact Gilda who was carried away. He collapses in despair, remembering the old man's curse.

ACT 2

The Duke's Palace

The Duke is concerned that Gilda has disappeared. The courtiers then enter and inform him that they have captured Rigoletto's mistress. By their description, he recognizes it to be Gilda and rushes off to the room where she is held. Pleased by the Duke's strange excitement, the courtiers now make sport with Rigoletto, who enters singing. He tries to find Gilda by pretending to be uncaring, as he fears she may fall into the hands of the Duke. Finally, he admits that he is in fact seeking his daughter and asks the courtiers to return her to him. Rigoletto attempts to run into the room in which Gilda is being held, but the courtiers block the way. Gilda enters. The courtiers leave the room, believing Rigoletto has gone mad. 

(The courtiers mock Rigoletto)

Gilda describes to her father what has happened to her in the palace. In a duet Rigoletto swears vengeance against the Duke, while Gilda pleads for her lover.

ACT 3

A street outside Sparafucile's house

A portion of Sparafucile's house is seen, with two rooms open to the view of the audience. Rigoletto and Gilda arrive outside. The Duke's voice can be heard from inside, singing "La donna è mobile" ("Woman is fickle"). Sparafucile's sister, Maddalena, has lured him to the house. Rigoletto and Gilda listen from outside as the Duke flirts with Maddalena. Gilda laments that the Duke is unfaithful; Rigoletto assures her that he is arranging revenge: "Bella figlia dell’amore" ("Beautiful daughter of love"). Rigoletto orders Gilda to put on a man's clothes to prepare to leave for Verona and tells her that he plans to follow later. After she leaves, he completes his bargain with the assassin, who is ready to murder his guest for 20 scudi. Rigoletto then withdraws.

With falling darkness, a thunderstorm approaches and the Duke decides to spend the rest of the night in the house. Sparafucile directs him to the ground floor sleeping quarters, resolving to kill him in his sleep. Gilda, who still loves the Duke despite knowing him to be unfaithful, returns dressed as a man and stands outside the house. Maddalena, who is smitten with the Duke, begs Sparafucile to spare his life. Sparafucile reluctantly promises her that if by midnight another victim can be found, he will kill the other instead of the Duke. 

(Gilda overhears Sparafucile promise his sister to kill a random stranger instead of the Duke)

Gilda, overhearing this exchange, resolves to sacrifice herself for the Duke, and enters the house. Sparafucile stabs her and she collapses, mortally wounded. At midnight, when Rigoletto arrives with money, he receives a corpse wrapped in a sack, and rejoices in his triumph. Weighting it with stones, he is about to cast the sack into the river when he hears the voice of the Duke, sleepily singing a reprise of his "La donna è mobile" aria. Bewildered, Rigoletto opens the sack and, to his despair, discovers his dying daughter. For a moment, she revives and declares she is glad to die for her beloved. She dies in his arms. Rigoletto cries out in horror. [synopsis borrowed from Wikipedia]

The Production

Rigoletto is a wonderful opera, a story of high tragedy expressed through gorgeous music. It features some of the most well-known arias in the world such as “La donna é mobile” and “Caro nome” as well as my personal favorite: the maginificent quartet “Bella figlia dell’amore”. 

Whenever a classic piece of theatre, ballet or opera is put on the stage, the question often revolves around two choices: 1) a traditional production or 2) a modern interpretion. While I have enjoyed traditional productions of operas such as Tosca, La Bohème and La Traviata, I generally prefer “modernized” productions of the classics as these tend to engage critically and creatively with the material in a way that traditional productions rarely do. Fortunately, the Chilean-German director and scenographer Aniara Amos has chosen to stage this production in a modern and visually arresting manner. 

Aniara Amos has chosen a rather bold strategy by telling the story after the fact. The opera opens with Rigoletto as a broken man, confined to a mental asylum, bedridden and strapped into a straitjacket. The story that unfolds before our eyes takes place entirely in Rigoletto’s broken mind, which is reflected in the both the stage-setting and the costumes. Everything is garish and distorted. 

(Party at the palace of the Duke of Mantua)

The remembered events take on a nightmarish cast and the characters surrounding him are either caricatures or faceless automatons hidden behind masks. He is trapped in a nightmare of his own making.

Producing a Counter-Story

This narrative gambit opens up a space for the audience to read the story against the grain, to create their own counter-stories. It is a stroke of pure genius because it introduces an element of uncertainty into the narrative. The story that unfolds before our eyes suddenly becomes suspect because we cannot trust Rigoletto’s memories. He’s in a mental institution because he’s had a complete break-down so it is very possible that he rewrites events due to his psychological trauma. 

Since the story takes place entirely in Rigoletto’s mind - as a mix of memories and a fiction - all the characters are in a sense facets of his broken psyche. This opens up for a much darker interpretation of one of the core aspects of the story: his relationship with his daughter Gilda.

Rigoletto is a character whose tragedy is entirely of his own making. He is, in a sense, a Tragic Hero who is undone by his own flaws - and he generally invokes both pity and fear. Rigoletto’s fatal flaws are his hatred of the nobility and his idealization of his daughter. 

He gets a perverse pleasure from corrupting the Duke, egging him onto a path of dissolution and debauchery. He mocks the courtiers, which makes him enemies. However, there’s another side to his personality. He lives a kind of double-life as a cynical jester and as a doting father. He tries to keep the two spheres of his life completely separate and the tragedy occurs when the two spheres meet. He strives to keep his daughter Gilda completely innocent of the more dangerous and sordid aspects of life - but that also means that she has no defense against a practiced seducer like the Duke. Rigoletto is essentially the author of his own tragedy and that is part of what makes his story so poignant.

SEXUAL PURITY AND THE IDEAL OF WOMANHOOD

There is, however, an aspect of the story that has always annoyed me: the character of Gilda. She has never felt like a “real” character to me but rather a slightly modified version of The Angel in the House:

The popular Victorian image of the ideal wife/woman came to be "the Angel in the House"; she was expected to be devoted and submissive to her husband. The Angel was passive and powerless, meek, charming, graceful, sympathetic, self-sacrificing, pious, and above all--pure. (x)

Gilda isn’t really a person in this story but rather the embodiment of a very pernicious model of ideal womanhood; an ideal that is embedded in the culturally pervasive Madonna-Whore Complex, which can be described as:

The tendency for men to not be able to integrate the "dualisms" of women. Though EACH and EVERY female IS in fact fully capable of BOTH, it appears man's greatest challenge is to resolve them both in the same woman, thus these two aspects of the female must be relegated into two very separate and distinct categories--one or the other, black or white, Madonna or Whore. (x)

Gilda is so overwhelmingly angelic in her purity and kindness that she willingly sacrifices her life for a cheating douche that she has know for about 5 minutes. She’s an ideal instead of a fully fleshed out character and that is why it is difficult to connect with her character. This may not have been much of a problem for a Victorian audience but for a modern one, she is utterly incomprehensible. 

Aniara Amos’ production addresses this particular aspect explicitly through the stage-setting and the direction of the singers - and it is the narrative gambit of letting the story play out in Rigoletto’s mind that makes a critical exploration of patriarchal gender norms and sexual mores possible. It is an approach that cast the relationship between Rigoletto and his daughter in a much darker light.

PRISONER IN ALL BUT NAME

One troubling aspect of the story is the fact that Gilda is not allowed to go outside unless it is to attend church. She has no idea of her father’s profession and she doesn’t even know his name! Neither will he tell her anything about her mother. She is kept in complete ignorance of everything apart from the teachings of the Church.

Aniara Amos emphasizes this troubling aspect of Rigoletto’s relationship with Gilda but having her literally locked up in a vault in his home. There’s also a degree of infantilization at play that is underscored by her costume, which is more suitable for a little girl than a young woman.

Since the story takes place in Rigoletto’s tortured mind, Gilda is not really a “person” but rather Rigoletto’s idealized memory of her. She is his little doll that he takes out to play house with - and the direction of the singers wonderfully subverts the image of Rigoletto as a loving and doting father by having him turn Gilda on and off with a remote control! The soprano’s robot-like movements supports this doll-like quality.

There’s something incredibly twisted and sinister about the relationship between Rigoletto and Gilda that this production highlights. Gilda is less like a daughter and more like an object to Rigoletto. She is his prized possession, locked up in a vault for safe-keeping and he is the only man that has access to her - until the Duke finds her at home.

I have already stated that Gilda is written as the embodiment of a historically specific ideal of womanhood: the meek, self-sacrificing and “pure” Angel in the House. However, the narrative gambit of having the story take place entirely in Rigoletto’s broken mind changes the inter-personal dynamics between the characters because all of the characters are reflections of Rigoletto himself in this particular set-up. If Gilda represents Rigoletto’s idealized view of his daughter, then what does the figure of the Duke represent? This is where the story gets really uncomfortable because if the Duke is yet another repressed facet of Rigoletto’s mind, then he functions as an expression of a repressed incestuous desire on the part of Rigoletto. It may sound preposterous on the surface but it fits with the way that Gilda is denied any kind of sexual agency in her story, which revolves around seduction and heart-break.

When Rigoletto imagines the Duke’s seduction of Gilda, it is a seduction completely devoid of romanticism and erotic desire. Rather, in Rigoletto’s mind the Duke seduced Gilda with an image of comfortable domesticity:

Likewise, Rigoletto can only imagine what happened between Gilda and the Duke at the Palace as rape (indicated by her disheveled costume).

There’s is no room for any kind of agency on Gilda’s part when it comes to her seduction. Rigoletto cannot bear the idea of his little innocent daughter-doll having her own ideas and desires. She is his prized possession and she was taken from him and used by another man. Her own feelings are of little importance to him as he swears vengeance on the Duke despite his daughter’s pleas for mercy.

GILDA’S RESISTANCE

While the story that plays out on the stage essentially is Rigoletto’s memory of events, Aniara Amos has included some subtle hints in the scenography and the direction that Gilda may not have been the meek, innocent and “pure” little doll of his memories.

When Rigoletto opens the vault where he keeps Gilda locked away from the world, an important detail is revealed to the audience. The back of the vault door is filled with marks that counts the days of Gilda’s incarceration - thus hinting that she was NOT the compliant little girl that Rigoletto imagines her to have been.

Furthermore, when he turns his back on her, Gilda makes blatantly sexual gestures that contrast with the little girl image that Rigoletto has imposed upon her. Rigoletto doesn’t want to see Gilda as a sexual creature but the stage direction makes it clear that she isn’t the sexless little doll that he wants her to be.

The gambit of letting the story be told after the fact, through Rigoletto’s memories, introduces a certain level of instability into the narrative. We, the audience, can’t discern what is memory and what is fiction that Rigoletto has created to shield himself from painful truths. It is an approach the opens up a narrative space for creating counter-histories if we begin to question as it is presented.

There are, as said, signs that Gilda was not content with being locked away from the world - and that she had sexual desires of her own. Little details that create cracks in the image of the pure, meek and submissive Angel in the House.

What if Gilda was not abducted? What if she ran away from an extremely controlling parent? Could it be that the sex she had with the Duke was consensual rather than forced as it appears in his memories? 

These are all questions that address these subtle hints of a resistance on Gilda’s part and they are made possible by staging the story as a tale told retro-spectively.

MURDER MOST FOUL

I have always found Gilda’s death rather nonsensical since it is hard to imagine someone willingly sacrificing their life for a cheating douche that broke their heart. In the story of Rigoletto, Gilda’s death is not really about her character but about his pain, his tragedy. 

However, Aniara Amos’ production creates the narrative space for the telling of a different story. In this story Gilda’s death is not the combination of self-sacrifice and accidental homicide but rather a murder most foul where a father murders his child. This is, of course, a speculative reading - but you have to bear in mind that in this particular production, the assassin Sparafucile is quite literally Rigoletto’s dark mirror - he represents the violent part of Rigoletto’s personality, which the costuming emphasizes.

Sparafucile wears a black version of Rigoletto’s jester’s hat - but in this production, it is ultimately Rigoletto that wields the dagger and it is him who delivers the killing blow. This is the only time that Aniara Amos’ production diverges from the original text where it is Sparafucile that kills the disguised Gilda. 

Having Rigoletto delivering the killing blow himself is a very significant departure from the text - and this is narratively significant in a big way because it ties up all the subtle little hints of Gilda’s resistance with a much darker story. A story where a young woman’s resistance against parental control and her sexual awakening is punished by her father with murderous violence. 

This is, in a sense, my counter-story to the traditional story of Rigoletto - but it is a counter-story made possible by subtle hints and details in the production as well as the narrative gambit of having the story told by a distraught man who has suffered a severe mental break-down. The audience is not in a position to discern between Rigoletto’s actual memories and the little fictions that he creates to soothe his guilty mind. 

The final scene where Gilda sings about how glad she is to die for her beloved, as she slowly ascends to the heavens, may be just such a little fiction with which Rigoletto soothes his mind and tries to assuage his guilty conscience.

Controversy

This production caused quite a bit of controversy with the professional reviewers who either loved it or hated it. What I find interesting is the fact that the people who really hated Aniara Amos’ production mainly reacted against the aesthetics of the production. I can certainly understand that grotesque make-up, harsh lights, weird costumes and pornographic blow-up dolls might have been a bit too much for the delicate sensibilities of the petite bourgeoisie but I am always annoyed when they name these aspects an empty visuality that distracts from what they deem the main thing: the music.

Opera, however, is not just about the music - it is a story told through music, acting and stage-setting. You never really encounter critiques such as this with traditional productions of famous operas. In most of these cases, the stage-setting and costumes are just a pretty background for the music. 

I need more from my theatrical experiences. I need a production that not only tells a story in an interesting manner - but also engages critically with it to make old stories relevant for a (post)modern audience. Staging Rigoletto in the same manner as it was done in the mid 19th century won’t do that. If opera becomes a museum of a specific musical culture, then it becomes less interesting - it should be a place where there’s room for debate.

Recently, a production of Carmen at the opera house of Florence, Italy, caused a big stir because the director chose to alter the ending of the story in order to make a statement about the abuse and mistreatment of women in our society. In this new production, Carmen kills her abusive lover in self-defense instead of being killed herself.

The producers said they had changed the denouement of the story in part to protest at the large number of Italian women who are killed each year by jealous husbands, boyfriends and lovers. So frequent are such murders that Italians have a name for the phenomenon – “femminicidio”, or femicide. Sociologists and campaigners say it is driven by men feeling threatened by the greater freedoms and enhanced economic independence that many Italian women now enjoy after decades of being seen as pliable possessions.

With horrific cases of domestic violence coming to light almost every month, the directors of the work said they were uncomfortable with the idea of audiences applauding the final scene, in which Carmen is stabbed to death and lies motionless on the stage.

“At a time when our society is having to confront the murder of women, how can we dare to applaud the killing of a woman?” said Cristiano Chiarot, the head of the opera house, the Teatro del Maggio Musicale Fiorentino. “I believe one can remain faithful to the spirit of the opera whilst taking certain liberties – as happened in classical times, when there were various versions of the most famous myths, without their original meaning being compromised,” he told La Repubblica newspaper.

Leo Muscato, the opera’s director, was initially resistant to the idea of changing the ending. “The death of Carmen is the engine that drives the opera, why reverse the situation?” he said. “Then I understood that what Chiarot was calling for was reasonable. The theme of death in the opera has a strong masculine element – the woman must sacrifice herself in order to save her freedom. It is a point of view that today makes no sense.” (x)

This is a rather long quote but I’m leaving it in because I have very mixed feelings about making such radical changes to the source material. It is one thing to make a radical interpretation of myths, legends and fairy tales that come from an oral tradition where details are altered with the re-telling. It is quite another thing to change the narrative denouement in the work of a named author. 

A good director will be able to incorporate a social or political critique into a production - and that is exactly what Aniara Amos does with Rigoletto at the Royal Danish Opera. It is done subtly through the acting, lighting, costuming and stage-setting. It is an approach that demands an attentive audience, which mean that not everyone will “get it” - as evidenced by the pearl-clutching in a number of reviews.

(Thanks to the @thelawyerthatwaspromised for the GIFs)

[gayruthven]

history and inspiration for the character lord ruthven + the similarities between him in the vampyre vs. tcsov

read a short story that was published in 1816 in spanish class lmao and i decided to write this post for fun its long as fuck but honestly a interesting read if u want to know more than u need to abt lord ruthven

here is a link to where you can read the vampyre. its really good but really outdated and hard to read soooo theres a pretty detailed summary in this post. 

a quick backstory for the creation of the vampyre and the man who was used unwillingly as the inspiration for the original lord ruthven:

 in the year 1816 a famous french poet named lord byron (he was considered very edgy for his time and everyone thought he was sexy, dramatic and scandalous lmao) rented a house at lake geneva in switzerland for the summer (he fled england due to his divorce to avoid social fallout- some say he was actually driven from england due to the possibility he would be outed as bisexual, which he was). his personal physician john polidori accompanied him and his lover claire clarement made arrangements to be in switzerland at the same time and bought along her step sister, mary wollstonecraft godwin as well as mary’s lover, percy bysshe shelley. 

1816 is famously known as the year without a summer due to a huge volcanic eruption in modern day indonesia that caused a majority of the northern hemisphere to be covered in a thick layer of ash. so despite it being summer, it was very chilly and the sun was dimmed due to the fog to be red and it happened to rain a lot. because of the atmosphere surrounding that summer, lord byron spent a majority of his days reading ghost stories and decided to challenge his companions to each write a horror story of their own. 

that summer lord bryon worked on a piece published in his collection fragments of a novel. it featured a dastardly, possibly supernatural nobleman. john polidiri, who had previously written what mary wollenstein godwin described as horrendous was about a woman with a skull head lol, and after reading the fragment polidiri was inspired to write the vampyre. its claimed he kinda completely copied the fragment, i haven’t read it and can’t talk abt it cause this is supposed to be abt lord ruthven lmao. he decided to model the devilishly attractive lord ruthven after lord byron himself (which sucked for lord byron cause that really wasn’t good for his public image). the two of them had a thing- this woman macdonald once described polidiris jealous outbursts and tantrums over lord byron. it was sorta like a angry ex demonizing their past partner lol. 

before i move onto the differences and similarities between the two lord ruthvens here is a summary of the vampyre: 

the story the vampyre tells the tale of a attractive young man named aubrey. both lord ruthven and aubrey  appear as newcomers in high class parties in london around the same time. everyone, including aubrey, find themselves oddly fascinated with lord ruthven due to the intensity of his stare, his wicked handsomeness and his strange paleness. after becoming entranced with lord ruthven, aubrey is invited to accompany on his trip throughout europe. already being expected to travel in order to truly be considered to have reached adulthood, aubrey jumps at the opportunity. 

as they travel together aubrey starts to notice some REALLY WEIRD shit about lord ruthven. the guy loves to gamble and gives his money away to the people very often, but only people who use the money for their vices who don’t really need it. lord ruthven tries to seduce a young italian girl, but aubrey ruins that for him and decides it would be wise to distance himself from lord ruthven and travels to greece alone. 

once in greece aubrey falls in love with a woman. or, well, he likes the fact she doesn’t love him and that it would be absolutely ridiculous for him to ever want to marry him. basically he finds comfort in his attraction to her cause it means he DOESN’T REALLY like lord ruthven lol. she tells him stories about vampyres living the woods by athens, which aubrey thinks is absolutely ridiculous.

after failing to make it to town after tending to something important, he gets caught in the woods after nightfall and has a encounter with a vampyre who kills the woman he was in “love” with and after a close encounter with the vampyre, he is saved by the towns people appearing flares. 

aubrey is bedridden after this incident and loses his mind a bit. he curses ruthven quite a bit in a crazed daze, yet comes to his senses one day only to realize he was being nursed to health by no other than lord ruthven himself. aubrey accepts ruthvens kindness and they decide to put their past agreements behind them and travel together again. 

lord ruthven gets murdered in a run in with some bandits. upon his death bed, aubrey is forced to swear he won’t tell anyone anything negative about lord ruthven for a year and a day after his passing. 

when he returns to england, it’s around the time when aubreys younger sister is finally about to enter society. she is very excited that aubrey will accompany her. but after attending his first party upon his return, he is pulled aside by someone who whispers for him to ‘remember his oath.’ its lord ruthven and that fucks aubrey up. 

he loses his mind a bit, which delights lord ruthven, and stays locked in his room mostly. he receives news one day that his sister is getting married and hes absolutely delighted! however, when he opens the heart locket she keeps around her neck he discovered the photo of the person inside of it is none other than lord ruthven. 

aubrey tries to get them to cancel the marriage. he fails, dies, and then his sister is killed by lord ruthven on the night of their wedding and he mysteriously disappears. 

its a very gay coded story that is REALLY GOOD so heres a link abt that

FINALLY the parallels between the two lord ruthvens relevant in tcsov:

lord ruthven in tcsov is obviously inspired by the one featured in the vampyre. two easy similarities is their lack of one eye and the fact their both highly regarded noblemen. their charisma is strongly attributed to their supernatural powers.  

in each piece of media, a young man becomes fascinated with them. while it isn’t as present in tcsov, it’s obvious lord ruthven is attempting to groom noe. which i believe is even relevant in their first encounter, despite ruthven not necessarily being aware of noes importance yet. lord ruthven holds noe against his chest when he melts the ice, forcing them to be in a position one would describe as affectionate closeness. 

similar to how aubrey is described as lord ruthvens curiosity, i believe the same applies to lord ruthven and noe. lord ruthven in tcsov’s acts of kindness towards noe remind me greatly of when lord ruthven tended to aubrey when he was bedridden. while i do believe lord ruthven in the tcsov does indeed feel some sort of affection for noe, its pretty obvious their acts of manipulation. 

him renting out the entire restaurant he brought noe to forces them to be isolated. he claims it was his favorite and says the reason why he rented out the establishment was because he wanted to have a leisurely talk with noe. this is supposed to make noe feel like hes receiving special treatment, similar to the way lord ruthven in the vampyre lures aubrey into a similar situation when he invites him to travel alone with him.  

the way he talks to other people in the series only furthers this point. while speaking to veronika or vanitas, he is incredibly apathetic and when he does smile its devoid of emotion. lord ruthven in the vampyre is described with these characteristics, as a cold, withdrawn man with a dead stare. this is contradicted only by his change of attitude when tending to aubrey. both noe and aubrey are lured into a false sense of safety.

another striking similarity is the fact they both put someone under an oath. while aubrey was manipulated emotionally by lord ruthven in the vampyre to swear he wouldn’t reveal anything that would harm lord ruthvens reputation, we’re all aware of that fun little scene from chapter 19 lol.

this oath ultimately drives aubrey insane that due to it hes unable to save his sister or anyone else who would ultimately become a victim of lord ruthven. while we havent witnessed what lord ruthven in tcsov forces noe to do yet, its easy to infer it will have similar results to noes mental health. perhaps as a result he’ll be forced to witness the death of someone he cares deeply about and blames himself for not being able to save them much like aubrey and his sister?? 

[thottysnail]

The Force Awakens, a fanfic

I had a lot of problems with The Last Jedi and wanted to rewrite it, but in order to do that, I had to change some things in the Force Awakens. I meant to only do maybe one or two scenes but instead, I got carried away and did half the movie. I’m not planning on writing the last Jedi in the same style, this kind of just happened

Maz knows. Maz always knows.

…

Kylo Ren can feel her. A pulsing beacon of energy, coiled and ready to spring. He can taste her fear in the air and feel the fight in her muscles. She reminds him of a cornered animal.

…

As soon as the saber is in Finn’s hand he feels it humming. He wonders if anyone could feel that, but he shakes it off and runs because Rey needs his help. This was all his fault for leaving, this was all his fault.

He knows the Stormtrooper with the mace and his scream of Traitor shakes Finn down to his core. The word slides into his chest and tries to strangle him. But staring at that mask, he remembers the way that Rey looked at him, and Finn charges.

…

Han sees Finn go down and panic strikes him. Already he’s attached to these damn kids. It’s Luke all over again. A single shot from his blaster and the trooper falls.

“You okay Mr. Big Deal?” he asks, and his tone is gruff because he’s starting to believe that this kid could be a big deal. He doesn’t know much, but he knows that a saber is a Jedi’s weapon and not just anyone can wield it. His mind is dragged towards Ben, little Ben building his first saber and being so so proud--but he tears himself away because he can’t think about that now.

And then they’re captured and it’s not the first time he’s been marched at gunpoint and he knows it won’t be the last. It’s just like the old days, he muses. Two punk kids dragging him and Chewie into the good fight. He’s calm. Calmer than he should be. Because sometimes you can’t escape your past and sometimes you don’t want to.

“Whoo! That’s one helluva pilot!” Finn yells.

The X-Wings show up right on time, and there’s only a split second when he squints up into a cockpit and expects to see Luke.

…

   His voice is cool and calm as he looks at the girl, frozen in his grasp. Even with the fear overtaking her he could see the fight in her eyes. He knew if he released her from his force grip she would attack him by any means necessary. Rip him apart with her teeth if she had to. He’s fascinated, and beyond that, she’s seen the map. This tiny spec of nothing has stumbled across what he’s been searching for for years. She found the map, the Falcon...and he had heard the roar of a Wookie in the distance and that could only mean one thing. How, in such a short time, had she managed to collect so many pieces of his past?

“Pull the division out. We have what we need.”

…

Han turns and sees his son. There is nothing but white noise. There is no battle around him. There is only his son. And in his son’s arms is the girl he had brought to this place. She was his responsibility. Ben was his responsibility too.

“NO! REY!” Somebody is shouting but Han cannot hear them.

   He watches Finn run after the ship, even after it has taken off. The only thing that stops him from doing the same is Chewie’s hand on his shoulder.

…

Finn holds the blaster limply in one hand, chest heaving as he watches the ship take off. Rey is gone. He turns, storming back to Han.

   “They took her! Did you see that? They took Rey!” and it was all his fault. She only ran because he was going to leave and it was all his fault. Han is looking after the ship. He looks haunted.

   “She’s gone!”  Finn repeats desperately, looking for some answer in the war hero’s face.

   “Yeah... yeah, I know…” Han’s voice is a murmur. Finn isn’t sure if he’s talking about Rey.

…

There’s a turn in the air, and Han might be as force sensitive as a doorknob, but she is unmistakable. He and Chewie make their way to the Resistance Transport that has just landed. There’s a lump in his throat that he can’t seem to swallow, and he knows exactly what’s going to happen. The doors open and there she is. Standing in smoke and embers and looking right at home in the midst of a battle there is Leia.

   And there’s that blasted droid.

…

“You changed your hair,” Han comments, and Leia wants to laugh and cry and put her head in her hands all at the same time.

“Same jacket,” her tone is wry and through all the pain she can’t deny she’s happy to see him.

   “No, new jacket,” he sounds offended and her lips twist just the slightest.

   Chewie gives a long howl and pulls her into a tight hug. The tension hasn’t really left her shoulders at any point in her life, but it does lessen in this moment. Chewie boards the ship, and she and Han are left alone once more. There is something in Han’s face that scares her. He opens his mouth and closes it again, and she watches with a critical eye.

“...I saw him, Leia. I saw our son. He was here.”

   She doesn’t react. She knew their son was there. She could feel him, an angry and writhing dark spot in the force. She can always sense him, no matter how far he goes.

   A mother always knows.

   “I know,” she replies.

…

Finn has no idea who the woman standing in the middle of the chaos is, but if she can help Rey she’s fine by Finn.

   “General Organa, sorry to interrupt, but this is Finn, he needs to talk to you--”

   Finn almost chokes on his own spit at the name Organa. This was Princess, Senator, General Leia Organa.

   Leia took his hand in a firm shake, “And I need to talk to him. That was incredibly brave, what you did. Renouncing the First Order, saving this man's life --”

Princess, Senator, General Leia Organa knows who he is, but despite the shock, he still cuts her off.

“Thank you, ma'am -- but a friend of mine was taken prisoner--

“Han told me about the girl, I'm sorry,” she shakes her head and looks down. She seemed genuinely sorry.

“General, Finn is familiar with the weapon that destroyed the Hosnian system. He worked on the base.

…

Leia looked at the young man, slightly shocked. She could feel the force in him. Suppressed, but there. And growing. She saw the lightsaber hanging from his belt and she knew she would have to take another leap of faith on another stranger.

“We’re desperate for anything you can tell us.”

“That’s where my friend was taken--I’ve got to get there fast.”

“And I will do everything I can to help, but first you must tell us all you know.”

…

Han follows his wife desperately, “Listen to me, will you? I know every time you... every time you look at me, you're reminded of him.”

Leia turns and looks up at him. Her eyes are wet but no tears escape. “You think I want to forget him? I want him back!”

“There was nothing we could've done. There was too much Vader in him.” Han desperately wants to believe his own words. To believe anything that would ease the guilt that’s chased him across system after system.  

“That's why I wanted him to train with Luke. I just never should have sent him away. That's when I lost him. That's when I lost you both.”

Han falters, unprepared to face the damage he caused her.  

“We both had to deal with it in our own way. I went back to the only thing I was ever good at.”

They watch a group of soldier jog by. “We both did.” She says it with acceptance. Han knows he is not forgiven, but he knows she is no longer angry with him.

“We lost our son, forever.” It’s the first time he’s said it aloud and as soon as the words leave his mouth he sees the fiery twenty-something in hair buns fresh with the loss of something precious and ready to change the world by force.

“No.” She is silent for a moment, and Han has never had more hope put in a single word. “It was Snoke. He seduced our son to the dark side. But we can still save him. Me. You.” Leia has never doubted her own power, but Han has doubted his.

“If Luke couldn't reach him, how could I?” Han is desperate for an explanation, for Leia to make his world make sense again.

“Luke is a Jedi... you're his father. There's still light in him. I know it.” He could never doubt her.

…

Rey opens her eyes and realizes she is bound. She struggles for a moment, testing the strength of her restraints. She remembers how Unkar Plutt used to tie her wrist to a tent post at night after she tried to escape.

She looks over and is startled to find the man in the mask standing over her. He must have been watching her. She is dazed, her mind is still foggy from whatever he had done to her. But her voice is clear.

“Where am I?”

It stares at her for a moment and she shudders. There is something creeping across her skin as weightless and dark as a shadow. Somehow she knows it is him.

“You’re my guest.” His voice is filtered by a mechanical warble. It’s soft, and she wonders if it’s an impression of being non-threatening.

“Where are the others?” she demands. He seems more curious than anything else, but those types were always the most dangerous. They’d pick you apart like a dead Star Destroyer.

   “Where are the others?” she continues, not breaking eye contact with where his eyes would be.

“You mean the murderers, traitors, and thieves you call friends?” he paused, and she was unflinching, “You'll be relieved to hear that I have no idea.” She was relieved. But curiosity was rising in her. She can almost see darkness flitting around him like a second skin.

…

“You still want to kill me.” He’s not upset about it. It’s merely an observation. He can feel the hatred in her rolling off in waves. It’s almost overpowering. She was looking at him with fear, yes. But curiosity as well. She was a scavenger, used to picking things apart and finding their use. He got the feeling that was how she was looking at him.

“That happens when you're being hunted by a creature in a mask,” her words were pure venom and made him pause. He considered her for a moment. Perhaps he could get the information from her without invading her mind. He reaches up and there is a mechanical hiss as he removes his mask. His dark hair falls and he shakes his head slightly to clear it from his eyes.

“Tell me about the droid.” Their eyes are locked now. She meets his gaze without flinching, and he wonders who else she’s stared down like this.

She inhales, “He's a BB unit with a selenium drive and a thermal hyper scan vindicator --”

“He's carrying a section of a navigational chart. We have the rest, recovered from archives of the Empire. We need the last piece. And somehow, you convinced the droid to show it to you. You. A scavenger…”

Now she is truly afraid. She recoils and her mouth twists. He pushes deeper at her weakness.

“You know I can take whatever I want.” Trepidation flashes across her eyes. Kylo Ren moves closer, his hand rising toward her. She recoils but has nowhere to go. His gloves are centimeters from her face, almost touching but not quite. He freezes as their eyes meet once more and an energy passes between them. He almost recoils because he recognizes it, recognizes the power and the flow of light and dark. But it passes. And he moves on with his task. He pushes her mind into hers, trying, for some reason, to be gentle. But she’s resisting, trying to push him out.

He sees a child held tightly by an obese creature, screaming at a ship to come back. He sees that child being ordered and shoved into small places the adults can’t reach, pushed to climb great heights inside the dead husks of starships. He sees her trying to escape into the desert one night and being caught. The same fat creature ties her outside in the freezing desert.

And when she’s grown too big to fit into the nooks and crannies, Plutt, for that was his name, releases her. She’s abandoned once again in endless sand, utterly alone. Still holding out hope for her parents’ return.

“... You're so lonely... so afraid to leave…”

He sees her fending off the other scavengers, growing up alone and feral. Making a tiny home for herself. Always half starving, always afraid.

“At night, desperate to sleep... you imagine an ocean. I see it -- I see the island…”

Anger grew in him as he pushed harder to see snippets of the past days, “And Han Solo. You feel like he's the father you never had. He would've disappointed you.”

His hand still almost on her face, and her eyes fierce through the agony

“Get out of my head,” she spits through grit teeth, tears streaming down her face.

Kylo Ren leans closer, “I know you've seen the map. It's in there... and now you'll give it to me. Don't be afraid…” The energy rose between them again, and the last words slipped out before he could stop them “I feel it too.”

“I’m not giving you anything.” Her voice is deadly and every muscle in her body is tense and shaking.

He can’t help the quirk of a smile that shames his lips. “We’ll see.”

He pushes one last time and is stopped short by a barrier. He pries around it, prodding and searching for a weakness. She meets his gaze and he can tell she knows she’s stopped him.

Suddenly their roles are reversed and she has rushed forward, pushing into his mind like an ice pick. He can’t pull away and for a moment she has him locked in her own grasp.

“You...you’re afraid….that you will never be as strong as Darth Vader!” Her words are triumphant and he manages to rip himself away. He feels raw and wounded, breath coming in uneven bursts.

Rey is released, and she breathes deeply, keeping her eyes locked on him as he leaves.

…

Rey sits there panting for a moment afterward, letting her eyes close. She tries to piece together the images she saw--a burning building like the one in her vision, an old man standing over Kylo Ren--but all she had were pieces. A young Han solo and a beautiful woman with long brown hair that had to be Leia.

She could feel the power deep inside her, aching to get out. She was nearly trembling with it. She had heard the legends of the Jedi, and of Luke and the Empire. If all of that is real--if Kylo Ren and Darth Vader and Luke Skywalker were all real like Han said--could she have the force?

It was her only hope.

…

Finn has never had this many eyes on him, listening to what he was saying. He knew he wasn’t being fully honest, that he was only a janitor. But the information he gave was correct and they only thing he cared about was getting to Rey. If that hurts the first order and helped the resistance, he was all for it. But Rey was his first priority.

…

Leia can barely stand to watch Han pack up the Falcon. She’s having flashbacks to his trips, remembering how, after Ben left, they had been more and more frequent, lasted longer and longer. Until one day he just didn’t come back.

But she puts on a gruff smile and says “No matter how much we fought, I've always hated watching you leave.”

Han looks at her and there’s tenderness in his eyes. “That's why I did it. So you'd miss me. She laughs, moves up close to him.

“I did miss you.” She sighs, wrapping her arms around herself.

He looks at her, and says sweetly, out of the blue “It wasn't all bad, was it? Huh? Some of it was...good.”

Leia smiles just as sweetly. “Pretty good.”

Han looked around and back at her, “Some things never change.”

Leia laughs, “True. You still drive me crazy.” She’s attempting to lighten the mood but they both know he might not come back. They both know that she and the entire system could be gone before he does. Han places his hands on her shoulders. It could be thirty years ago, she thinks. It felt like not a day had gone by. They pull each other tight, holding for dear life.

“If you see our son,” Leia says quietly, “Bring him home.”

Han pulls away and nods. They look into each other’s eyes.

“I know,” he murmurs. And then he’s gone again.

…

Han swears if he makes it back alive, that’s the last time he’s leaving her ever again.

…

Kylo Ren freezes in the middle of giving an order. He should have known they would come to try and get the girl. He should have known it would be, “Han Solo,” the name sounds foreign on his tongue.

…

Han would slap Finn if he hadn’t done stupider things to impress a girl. Sanitation, of course he was just sanitation.

When they did finally find Rey, nobody was more relieved than Han

…

Rey has spent her entire life climbing inside ships. This one is no different. Her heart nearly stopped at a noise in the hallway, and she raised her rifle.

“Finn,” she breathes and he throws his arms around her into the tightest hug she’s ever experienced in her whole life. She never wants to let go.

“Are you alright?” Han asks, looking her over.

Rey nods, still clinging to Finn, “Yeah.”

Han nods in return, but his gruff eyes are soft. “Good.”

Finn holds her upper arms, “What happened -- did he hurt you?”

She interrupts him with a question of her own, “Finn, What are you doing here?!”

“We came back for you.” He says it as if it was the most obvious and easiest thing in the world. She is speechless, tears filling her eyes despite herself.

Chewie lets out a small rolling roar and nods towards the former Stormtrooper.

“What'd he say?” Finn asks, looking between Rey and the Wookie.

Rey doesn’t know what to say, so she shrugs, smiling “That it was your idea...Thank you.”

Finn smiles, and she feels safe for the first time in… she can’t remember how long.

“How did you get away?” he asked.  

“I can't explain it. And you wouldn't believe it--it was like mind control-”

Han looks startled, but he settles his face back into his usual expression, “Escape now. Hug later.”

…

It was the first time Han had really gotten a chance to see his son. Han remembered what Vader looked like. The black cape, the helmet. Every detail was burned into his brain like a wound. And looking at his son dressed all in black regalia, just like Vader, Han felt his own failure. It felt like he couldn’t breathe, and all he could see was a chubby-faced toddler held in Leia’s arms. He swallows and moved out onto the catwalk.

“Ben!” he calls out. His son’s head snaps to look at him. He wished he could see his face. Han glances behind him and sees that Chewie and the kids are watching. He takes another step forward, remembering Leia’s words. Bring our son home. He was going to do his damnedest not to fail again.

“Han Solo. I've been waiting for this day for a long time.” Ben’s voice is garbled, but it’s softer than Vader’s.

“Take off that mask. You don't need it.” Han isn’t sure he’s ready for what is underneath. Will his son be deformed beneath the mask? Will he still have Leia’s eyes? Han’s smile?

“What do you think you'll see if I do?” Ben’s head is cocked to the side. It’s a stance and defiance that is pure Leia and all Han wants to do is run but he takes another step forward.

“The face of my son!” His voice echoes across the narrow space and Han is painfully aware of how high they are.

Ben considers it and raises his hands to remove the mask. Dark hair falls down almost to his shoulders. Han can feel tears pushing at his eyes but he keeps his composure. Ben looked like them. He looked like Han and Leia both. This was the first time he had seen his own son as a man.

“Your son is gone. He was weak and foolish, like his father. So I destroyed him,” Ben’s voice is soft, and his eyes are curious as he looks at his estranged father.

“That's what Snoke wants you to believe but it's not true. My son is alive.” Han wants desperately to believe his own words. He wishes he had Leia’s conviction. He could use the conviction of a Skywalker right now.

“No. The Supreme Leader is wise.”

Han takes another step towards his son, “Snoke is using you for your power. When he gets what he wants, he'll crush you -- you know it's true.” He can see the hesitation in Ben’s eyes.

“It's too late.” His son’s eyes are stoic and dark, but his lips are trembling.

“No, it's not. Leave here with me. Come home. We miss you.” Han cannot express how much he meant his words, how desperate he was to take his child away from this place. A parent never loses the desire to protect their children, no matter how far they strayed.

Tears flood Ben’s eyes and Han wants nothing more than to pull him into his arms. Han can see the choice wavering in his son’s face, and suddenly he looks eight years old again. Looking at Han the same way he had when he and Leia had told him he was going to live with Luke.

“I'm being torn apart. I want to be free of this pain...I know what I have to do, but I don't know if I have the strength to do it. Will you help me?”

Han hears his son's voice again, pained and vulnerable, and he takes another step forward. If he reached out he could touch Ben. “Yes. Anything,” Han says desperately.

Ben slowly extends his gloved hand, reaching halfway out to his father.

…

Rey watches the scene below her, her knuckles white on the railing. Finn’s fingers are digging into her arm and she feels Chewie’s ragged, anxious breath on her neck. Kylo Ren is reaching out to Han. She can feel whatever energy has awakened inside her buzzing in the air, pulsing around the pair below.

Kylo Ren’s dark eyes look up and lock on her’s. There’s a sudden rush into her mind. It’s not a thought, it’s not an image, it’s an understanding. She knows what’s going to happen before it does, and already she’s reaching out her hand, willing the force to her.

Kylo Ren has his hand on Han’s shoulder, and Han’s face is curved around his son’s cheek. Kylo Ren shoves, hard.

Han falls, his head slamming on a piece of jutting metal, knocking him unconscious. Finn grabs the hand that is not reaching out to catch Han, and she feels an additional surge of power flow through her. Han stops, and like he’s on a rubber band, he snaps upwards and over the railing. Chewie manages to catch the older man, roaring wildly. Rey’s heart is pounding and she and Finn look at each other, understanding passing through their eyes.

They run.

…

Han comes to as the Falcon is landing. His head feels like it’s splitting open. Rey’s hands are flying over the controls, and Chewie is holding Finn in his arms. Han can see the blood staining the Wookie’s fur. They’re both so busy they don’t notice that Han has woken up. As soon as the doors open Chewie bolted out. Han pushed himself onto his feet, feeling his age in every joint. Rey is finishing up the landing protocol.

She jumps and nearly takes a swing at him before she realizes who it is.

“Hey kid,” his voice is soft, “Are you okay?”

She stares up at him, eyes filling with tears. She’s looking at him like nobody has ever asked that before.

He doesn’t say anything, he just helps her up and wraps an arm around her shoulders as they walk outside. Medics are swarming around Finn, rushing him into the base. Han looks out and sees Leia, and a sinking feeling settles into his chest. He had failed to bring their son back.

But Leia isn’t looking at him. Leia’s eyes are on Rey, and there is a connection there that Han knows he will never understand. A silent communication passes between the two women. Leia walks forwards, through the cheering crowds, and holds Rey’s face in her hands.

Han moves away and Leia wraps her arms tightly around Rey. Rey clings to her like a lost child.

It is hours later, and the three of them are alone together. Rey is wrapped in a blanket, her hair removed from its normal buns and hanging around her face. She looks between Han and Leia and takes a breath.

“He wasn’t going to kill you,” she looks at Han, “I don’t know how, but he looked at me and I knew...I knew I could catch you. And I knew that’s what he was asking me to do.”

Leia presses her hand to her chest, “There’s hope then.” Han feels like he’s hit his head again.

“You need to get to Luke,” Leia continues, reaching to grasp Rey’s shoulder, “He’s the only one who can train you. He’s probably the only one that can get us out of this mess,” she snorts as if even after everything she can’t believe her brother is a legend.

“I’m going with you,” Han says immediately. He has a few choice words for his brother in law, and more questions about the Force than he can count. But beyond that, he can’t stomach the thought of sending Rey across the galaxy alone.

Leia purses her lips, giving him a wry look, “I knew you wouldn’t stick around,” she sighs.

He reaches out and takes her face in his hands, “I’m going to come back. And I’m bringing Luke.”

She presses her cheek into his palm, her eyes slipping closed.

“I believe you.”

…

Leia watches as Chewie does last minute checks of the Falcon growling every now and then at Han’s complaints. Rey stands beside her. She’s strong in the force, Leia can feel it humming around her. It’s light but so filled with chaos.

“We’re ready! Let’s go!” Han yells.  Rey gives Leia a reassuring nod and walks off toward the Falcon.

“Rey!” Leia calls out. Rey turns, surprised. “May the force be with you.”

Rey grins, and Leia watches her only hope board the ship.