#and that means she regrets kt

[avisisisis]

i cannot stop thinking about anissa and marky though [COMIC SPOILERS]

how did he react when he learned what his mother did? just like mark, he lived a lie. he thought his mother was kind and nice — the only thing that is true is that she loved him, but now, he has no idea if he should believe it

and. you've grown up being conditioned to believe that violence is peace, and that kindness is a lie and a weakness. you hurt people. by hurting a person, by destroying him irreparably, you found the boy you love most: your son. and you don't regret it. you hope one day, once he sees him, he'll get it. but you still don't regret it. you can't say you're sorry

marky will grow up without his biological father, because when mark hugs him he can only remember his mother and what she did to him. your father can't love you the way your mom did. you can't love your mother the way your father loved his

the worst part is, that it she hadn't done it, you wouldn't have existed. you wouldn't be here. your father will grow to love you. you will grow to accept each other. but you tend to wonder — if he never sees you as anything else other than your mother's son, then who will you have when everyone else you know dies?

[lovelyamneris]

“I was in this old church. And there was this man there. But he wasn’t…I don’t know how to explain it. And he was wearing a Raven mask. But not like Corbierre. It was just so awful, Amber. Everything felt so real and terrible. Like it really happened to me. Like it was a memory instead of a bad dream. And Victor was there too. It didn’t look like him, but I knew it was. And at first I thought he was there to save me from the guy in the Raven mask, but he wouldn’t. He just stood there and looked away. As if he didn’t care at all. Then I was at the Gatehouse and I couldn’t see anything. I just knew that I was angry. And that felt real too. More real than anything I’ve ever felt. I don’t know what it means. But, dreams don’t always have to mean something? Right?” -s3 Nina AU

[spitinsideme]

I JUST WATCHED TROLLS 2 AND 3 AND POMNI AND FAGATHA ARE LITTERALY THAT ONE COUPLE IN TROLL 3 THEY ARE ACTUALLY BRUCE AND HIS WIFEE!!!! THEY ARE THEM!!!!

first of sll, i want to sy that youre completely right and this is kind of them and secomd of all, i am about to be hormh for trolls 2 world tpur delta the country troll because i need to talk aboitit so badly. im putting a warning now that i am going to he HORNY i will get NSFW !!! i jst neees to get this off my chest i domt.care read at your own risk ive warned yo all

for the record, i love and respext women and i think all women are complex and have so muxb to.them. i also am normal

this womaj right here ... this love of my life .. never ib my life hav ei thought that trolls coukd have sex appeal, i domt look st them and think yeah whatever fuckable because they never have. bit her ? her aura lf sadness, her i take no shit thing, her toughness ... god i get the sex appeal now i fucking get it because i want her so .. so badly ...

i want to.fuckimg RIDE her and i donr even mean her horse side i dont want to ride her like a cowgirl bit god if she wants to do it in cowgirl position i happily fucking ill get in posoition ill get rrady and god o will JUMP on whateber thr fucm she will have me juml on i dont even lime dick but if she had one ? im giving the most sloppy, toe curling, gut wrenching, hair pulling, blood sucking, world ending, pussy shatterimg, cock destroying, orgasm overload head of the WORLD. illngive a mew meaning to a blowjob and if she has a pussy shit ill fuckong eat it too id do whatever she wnated id get on my knees for her id hump the FUCK out of her four horse legs shw wpukd have my wetness stuck in her fur for weeks afrer that and id lick kt lff okay id clesn it off for her id use my tongue skills tp do the jlb RIGHR and id ensing eery ssimgle second of having my tomfue on her. i want her to mount me like a fuckong horse i want her on.top of me as i lay stosmxh on.the floor i want her destroying me i want my inskde ANNIHILATED !!!! i want her to fuck me so hard my ovaries become scrambled eggs abd she tames them out, fries them, seasoms them, and serves them to me on a plate and tells me i did a good job with her beautoful southern voice. i want her to literlly obliterate me i want her to trample me i want my stomach lining to be destroyed becayse she wilm shove her hoove so far down my thrlst that it will cause friction burn and make my saliva acidic i liteelaly want her to est me oit and make me see god and have him be disgusted and terrfied at the sounds im makimg he needs to be scared and regret ever making genitals for humans becayse the face and the sounds i will be making will caise him to start planning a homosapien extermaination to start over humanity because hes terrfied of what he created by giving humajs sexual pleasure thats how good she will eat me out.

and.god her voide ? her fucking voice ? her southern accent ???? take me already ??? i want tp make her scream i need to mske her scream i want to.her her say my namewith her southern accent and i want her to call me sweerie throufhout it and ill make sure i please her so much that she will say it bwcause indeserce ir after makung her eyes rolls baxk and her legs kick i wanr her to kick me as shes having an orgasn i aant her o literally send me flying woth her kicks she shpukd kick me so hard that inget internal bleeding but, even with blood driping down my mouth from my lungs being punctured from my broken ribs, i come back.to help ride her throifh her orgasm and give her as many more as she wants i want her pulling my hair until she rips it all out and ingo bald id have a wig eveey single time and id suoer glue it onto my head so i coukd fall how jars shes pulling i wsnt her to pull that superglued wig off every time and i want to have my skull showikg by the ampunt of skin and musfle she pulled off

AND THE HAID ???THE FUCKING HAIE ???? GOD !!!! IM GETTING STARTED ON THAT BECAUSE JESUF FUCKING CHRIST I MEAN JOLLY FUCKING JEEZ ILL DO ANYTHING JUST TAKE ME ALREASY !!! her hair looks sosos soft and i want to touch jt .. i woukd beg for some of her hair, and then id take crochet courses abd lesrn how to crochet and after id do all that and do lots of practice id make knickers and a bra using the hair she had so kindly given me and id wear it every single day every single hour eveeh single minite for all the secknds that pass and it wpukd feel like delta herself touching me everyrwhere in those places for so long id even make fill on clothes out of he rhair and id wear them rverday and id get the appeal of clorhed sex, id never take my clothes off anymore, i woukdnt even have to because just having those clothes on would count as clothed sex becaause of how lustful id feel just wesing them. everyrime id move and the fricrion make the clorhes get mkre omto my body id start sweating, abd the swear would make the cllthes stick mkre tonmy body abd at that point id have the mosr earth desteoyong orgasm, the ground bellw me would be so destroyed that i could see the other side of the world from the hole i jjst created using my hole do you undeeatand ? im gay for herm i want her. i want to make a dildo using her hoove shape, and then i want to make a.cover for it using her hair anr that thong woukd be inside me every single fucking dsy nonstop id neve rtake ir our, by day two it woukd be disimtegrated because of how wet id made ir i woukd mske it out of steel or whateve5 fuckingg stromg ass materail but the poert of my pussy and love woukd get it to disintgerate and go soggy lke paper. that thing woukd merge inside me that it woukd count as a third limb it wpukd count as a whole new beong inside me id name it. my medical records would have tonbe changed to account for the thing i made in her honour because it ould nor officialby be part of me. it woukd be in there forever.

basiclsly, what im trying to say is, i think shes a reallyy cool charavter 👍

[welldonebeca]

Uncertain Ground (3)

Summary: After Herogasm, Abby meets Soldier Boy again. This time, though, he doesn’t plan on her leaving his sights again, and she realises there’s more to him than meets the eye. Pairing: Abby (OC) x Soldier Boy WC: 1.2k words Warnings: 1970s, angst, fluff. Hurt/Comfort. Smut. Vaginal sex. Dirty talk. Jealousy. 

If you like my work, consider buying me a coffee or subscribing to my Patreon. It’s just $2 a month and I promise you won’t regret it.

Masterlist

Abby stopped and stared at the beef in front of her for a moment, unsure.

Ben was coming over. Again.

It wasn't the first time he did it, he actually came over a lot recently, and they were... dating. Kinda. For a while. Actually, for a whole month now.

So when he called and said he was coming over, she wanted to make him something to eat, cause that was what people did when they were... dating.

"Here comes Soldier Boy and Crimson Countess right now!" the man on the TV announced, and she whipped her head around to see it.

Abby's heart squeezed tight in her chest when she saw the news showing their most recent story.

"We managed to catch some moments with America's favourite couple after their latest visit to the White House. Aren't they just perfect?"

The screen showed them just earlier that day, waving at reporters, before Soldier Boy dramatically pulled her into a kiss.

She knew she shouldn’t be jealous, it was just show business - she knew that too well.

When Abby was younger, it was all her mother spoke about when she told her she couldn’t date. She should focus on her career, having a boyfriend would just mean that’s all the media would care about her for, her relationships.

And yet, it stung. Very much so.

She couldn’t help but think that she could never, ever, be in that position with him, not even if they wanted it. People didn’t take it any kindly to miscegenation, the Supreme Court had just barely ruled the bans unconstitutional.

She couldn't help but imagine it, though.

Walking on the red carpet, him calling her his girlfriend and maybe secretly wanted to show that she was lovable enough to win the heart of America's hero.

A loud knock snapped her out of her thoughts and she jumped in surprised.

"Abby?" He was here? Already? She had barely had the pasta into the pan and she was still in her apron!

"On my way!"

She could lift cars ten times her weight but still struggled to get dinner ready in under an hour.

Abby tossed the apron off, thankfully for her quick thinking - she had done her make-up and changed into an outfit before starting to cook - and tossed the pasta into the pot quickly before rushing to the door, checking herself up before opening it.

Yep. She still looked better than Crimson.

Abby was a little surprised when she opened her door, and found him standing there in just… civilian clothes. It was the first time she saw him out of his uniform - aside from naked.

“Hey!” she greeted him. “Hi. Nice clothes!”

Ben smiled largely, opening his arms and showing off a little.

“This?” he asked. “I thought I could dress up for you.”

She smiled as he leaned closer to her, to kiss her lips. She bet Countess had never heard that.

“I was promised a dinner,” he purred, rubbing his nose on hers. “And maybe even dessert."

She giggled, but quickly remembered the boiling pot and the uncooked beef.

"Yes!" she shoved him back, and hurried into the kitchen. "You do take a seat, I already set up the dinner table for you."

"Maybe I should have called beforehand," she heard as he moved through the living room. "Is that wine?"

"Yeah!" she placed the best on the skilled. "And it's alright. I just... got my head in the clouds."

She hoped he didn't catch her in the blatant lie.

Ben thankfully didn't prod, more interested in the wine, and they fell into a comfortable silence as she cooked, humming a little old song to herself.

"Now that is a catchy tune," Ben noticed, surprising her with his presence in the kitchen.

"Oh," she flushed. "Yes. Kt was one of our chants back in my little league days."

One of the few nice things back from that time.

Ben frowned.

"You played baseball?"

She shook her head.

"No, no. It was The Little League of Heroes. I joined them when my powers first emerged."

More like her mother made her join it.

Ben looked very unsure.

"I'm sorry, what was the name?" he asked.

Abby smiled a little. Of course, he wouldn't know about it.

"It was for the non-white heroes," she explained. "For union and all."

"Oh," he spoke slowly, awkwardly.

She giggled.

"It's alright," Abby assured him. "We usually did community work and TV show appearances. We even had a special on Sesame Street once."

She tried not to cringe as she remembered her mother in her dressing room, telling her she couldn't ruin her makeup.

It was easier to wait for bruises to heal than to redo her makeup.

Her mother had very heavy hands.

"I bet you are so adorable," he teased her, arms suddenly wrapping around the waist. "Did you sign little show tunes all the time?"

She shrugged, trying to humble herself as she smiled.

"Singing, dancing, and some acting," she told him, heart beating out of her chest as he pushed her hair back to kiss her neck.

"Oh, a triple threat," he purred. "Maybe we have more in common than what I thought."

“Wait,” she turned to him. “You dance?”

Abby moved back quickly to turn the meat.

“You know, let me serve you and you tell me about this,” she pulled away, determined.

Ben barely ever talked about himself.

“It’s not much of a story,” he moved away from her. “Swept Jackie Kenny off her feet back in ‘62.”

She nodded along, seeing him smirk when she served his food.

“Not the only thing I did to her,” he chuckled under his breath.

Her face flushed at the statement.

"Ben!" she hit his arm, huffing.

"What?" he asked. "She was an easy piece. Not many women can resist me, you know?"

She rolled her eyes, not wanting to hear anything more.

“Yes, I’m sure,” she mumbled, angrily putting his plate down and sitting across from him.

Ben didn't look any happy.

"Oh, come on," he groaned. "You are acting just like Crimson."

Great, now she was being compared to both fucking Jackie Kennedy and Crimson Countess. And all for the other women who could not resist him.

"Can we just eat?" she snapped. "I worked hard on this dinner."

Ben tsked, clicking his tongue in displeasure, but complied, and they ate in silence as her thoughts brewed over her.

God, she couldn’t even take a little joke about his life. What kind of woman couldn’t take a joke about her boyfriend’s past?

Why would she be so worried about another woman catching his eye? It wasn’t like she could compare, anyway.

She wasn’t even that interesting, maybe he was just settling for someone unglamorous and that was why he was here.

Abby quickly took the plates away, and tried to keep her breath from hitching as she washed them. She was so pathetic, her mother was right.

She closed her eyes when he pressed his chest to her back.

"Baby doll, I didn't mean anything by it," he hummed, reaching and turning off the faucet, pulling her close.

"It's stupid," she mumbled. "I'm stupid."

"Hey, no," he turned her over, voice firm. "You are not."

She looked away, but Ben pulled her chin up.

"I shouldn't have brought it up, especially when you worked so hard to please me, all pretty," he told her, hands moving down her hips. "Who can think about Jackie when I got my own Marilyn right here?"

Her eyes shot up to his face. Marilyn.

"You didn't do it with her, right?" she asked. "Marilyn."

"What?" he asked. "No! Of course not."

She relaxed. Good. One last woman for her to worry about.

"You are my Marilyn," he smirked, rubbing his nose on hers.

She smiled a little, and he pulled her along.

"I think this is a good moment for me to mention my surprise for you," he told her, sitting down and taking her to stand in front of him.

"Surprise?"

What surprise?

"You are amazing," he told her. "People shouldn't remember you as just a kiddie hero, you are a real hero. So I pulled some strings and now you are performing on the Tonight Show."

Her eyes widened.

She what now?

"Ben!" she gasped. "You can't be serious."

He smiled.

"Would I ever lie to you?"

She watched his face for a moment, shocked, processing it, and threw herself in his arms when she realised what it meant.

"Oh, Ben!" she squealed. "This is incredible."

He laughed as he held her.

"There's that smile!'

She was so overjoyed she didn't even think about the words that left her mouth.

"I love you, you are so incredible!" she beamed, kissing him before even realising what she had just said.

Abby pulled away the moment she came to her senses, finding his eyes wide in shock.

"Oh my God," she stuttered. "I didn't mean-"

Before she could finish, he pulled her right back into a passionate kiss.

He manhandled her onto the table without any effort, and she gasped when he pushed her skirt up.

"I think I can have my dessert now," he decided.

Ben devoured her, licking and eating her out hungrily, knowing too well how to give her pleasure.

"Ben," she cried, arching her body to him.

He was always so good, always made her cum so quickly.

She was already on the edge.

And suddenly, his mouth was gone.

"Ben!" she whined, moving to sit up, but he held her down.

"Say it again," he huffed.

She blinked, confused, mind a little too foggy to understand him for a moment.

"What?"

"Say it again!" he growled.

Abby thought for a moment.

Oh.

"I love you," she exhaled.

He looked at her, as if expecting her to falter, but she didn't.

"I love you, Ben," she affirmed, firmly. "I know it is too soon, but you are the only man who ever made me feel like this. The one man who ever..." the only one who showed her he cared, she thought, but couldn't say it. "I love you."

No one had ever loved her the way he did, even if he didn't say that.

He broke their exchange of looks by putting his head between her legs, moving back to eat her out even more passionately, until she was crying and shaking and cumming.

After she finished, Abby sat up and grabbed his face, kissing him hungrily and crawling out of the table, kneeling between his legs and looking up at his face.

"I love you," she repeated, opening his pants. "I love you."

He moaned as she unbuttoned his pants and pulled his cock out. It was so big and thick, she sometimes wondered how she fit it inside her cunt before.

She took the head first into her mouth, moaning as she did so, looking up to see him watching her closely.

Ben's eyes followed her as she slowly swallowed his cock down, licking the skin, stretching her mouth around his thick cock, and he moved his hand to her hair, pushing his fingers into her curls.

"There you go," he groaned. "Good girl, taking her daddy's cock."

Her fave burned at the new nickname, taking more of him until her nose rested against his crotch, touching his trimmed hair.

“You like that, pretty girl?”  he grunted. “Taking my cock so damn good, just wanna-”

He pushed all the way into her throat, as deep as his cock could go, and Abby fought her gagging reflex, feeling her eyes tearing u and she took it was well as she could as Ben started fucking her throat.

"Love this mouth, so fucking good for me," he moaned. "All mine, my pretty girl."

Abby felt so full as he fucked her mouth. She never wanted to be anywhere else, just with him. Ben, her Ben.

His balls rested under her chin as he pulled her down again, and she reached her hands down, tenderly stroking them, making him quiver.

"Fuck," he chocked up, and she knew he was closer.

She pulled her mouth away from him slowly, and he grunted, almost pushing her back before she started using her hand to stroke him.

"Cum for me, Ben," she asked, boldly. "I want to feel you cum down my throat."

She took him in her mouth again, swallowing him down and actively sucking his dick, determined to make him peak.

It didn't take long, and he came calling her name, and Abby could feel the rush of his seed down her throat, eagerly swallowing.

She pulled away when he was done, and crawled back into his lap, quickly being embraced.

"Maybe we should head back to your bed," he chuckled. "Or not. I wouldn't mind christening this whole place."

She flushed, hiding her face in the crook of his neck.

"Ben," she spoke softly. "You... you didn't say it."

He caressed her back slowly.

"What?"

"When I said I love you, you... you didn't..."

She cringed at herself. Why couldn't she just enjoy what she had? He was already with her, why did she have to threaten that with stupid questions?

"Yeah," he moved, uncomfortable. "Right..."

Her heart picked up the pace, and she tried not to panic.

"It's alright," she said quickly. "You don't have to-"

"No, you are right," he interrupted her, sounding genuinely conflicted. "I should say it. It's just... I'm a man, we are not... the feeling type. It's not easy to say that shit."

Abby nodded, along, not even looking at his face, a little too embarrassed.

“It’s fine” she was quick to reassure him. “You’ve already done so much for me I shouldn’t ask for too much.”

Ben moved, and pulled her back gently, caressing her jaw and making her look at his face.

“You are a wonder, baby doll," he affirmed, eyes full of something she couldn't quite read. "I don’t know many other people like you. Everyone is always out for themselves but you’re just... you.”

She flushed at the praise, warm on the face, and kissed him slowly.

“Can you stay tonight?" she asked, hesitant. "Please?”

He always left. Ben had never stayed past morning.

"Of course, baby," he kissed her temple. "But first..."

He picked her up, and she grabbed his shoulder to level up.

"Let's do something more than sleeping now."

…

“Uncertain Grounds” was fully posted on my Patreon on 2022. If you like Soldier Boy and other Jensen Ackles characters, and like the idea of having early access to my work, consider checking it out. It’s just $2 a month and I promise you won’t regret it. (link takes you to the public masterlist)

…

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[randomnameless]

Still milking academy phase, huh? IS won't touch war phase unless players literally force them through CYL and stuff. Sometimes I wonder if they regret what they did with 3H, or just don't have any attachment to the characters because they let KT do most of the work, and only use them as easy cashgrabs. Also, where is the Lance of Ruin? And the Sword of Moralta? Sword of Seiros? And why is Luin an arcane weapon? Won't people turn into demonic beasts??? Why is Ingrid the only one from Nopes???

Poor Ingrid, she was Nopes'd :(

I'd say given how IS is allergic to giving the side eye to Supreme Leader, if an unit has a post timeskip design said unit will talk about how sad and shitty war is, thus shit on Supreme Leader (since saying "it's their fault for not dying when I ask them to" can't really work in a game celebrating the franchise).

(or they're keeping the war designs for brave alts ?)

Since Rearmed Grima the "lore" behind those weapons has been lost to existence, but yeah, it's a really bad move, especially considering how Rhea is in the banner ! As much as I'd have loved a sword version of her with her sword, it just won't happen.

Ultimately I think IS through heroes tries to retrofit/retool the characters KT, uh, developed in Nopes, while still trying to sell alts of course, so they focus on some traits while ignoring others...

Granted, FE16 characters have always been, imo, complicated to write since they should be able to join Tru Piss, Nopes fleshed out the BL more as a result, and I'd say it's no wonder the largely houses banner that comes after Nopes is a BL banner.

I mean, how are you supposed to write academy Leonie now that Nopes exposed she dgaf about villages being pilfered and refugees being hunted by her Supreme Allies ? Or won't give a fuck about attacking neutral third parties because her house Leader/king is completely stupid ?

[flotsam-gazette]

SONG FACTS

https://www.songfacts.com/songs/joni-mitchell

https://www.songfacts.com/songs/jackson-browne

https://www.songfacts.com/songs/graham-nash

https://www.songfacts.com/songs/crosby-stills-nash

https://www.songfacts.com/songs/crosby-stills-nash-young

https://www.songfacts.com/songs/stephen-stills

https://www.songfacts.com/songs/carole-king

https://www.songfacts.com/songs/the-mamas-the-papas

https://songmeanings.com/songs/view/3530822107858642092/

https://songmeanings.com/artist/view/songs/649/ — Joni Mitchell songs

https://songmeanings.com/songs/view/60025/ A CASE OF YOU (on Leonard Cohen)

https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2021/jun/22/joni-mitchell-blue-my-favourite-song-james-taylor-carole-king-graham-nash-david-crosby-kt-tunstall-birdy -- fave songs andsnips of personal life

https://faroutmagazine.co.uk/joni-mitchell-doomed-relationship-with-graham-nash/

https://www.cheatsheet.com/entertainment/joni-mitchell-left-smitten-graham-nash-despite-loving-way-think-possible.html/

https://jonimitchell.com/library/view.cfm?id=4631 JM + LC: The two longtime friends and one-time lovers first met at the Newport Folk Festival in 1967. Instantly hitting it off, the two then embarked on a relationship which would burn out within a few short months. Mitchell would spend a month living with Cohen at her Laurel Canyon home after Newport. After their relationship as lovers fizzled out, Mitchell penned the wonderful song ‘Rainy Night House’ as a farewell to their short but sweet relationship.  It is also rumoured that the timeless ‘A Case Of You’ was written with Cohen in mind (though never publicly confirmed). Whether this is true, however, the timing would suggest that it could possibly be the case.

https://jonimitchell.com/library/ — searchable, up-to-date articles.

https://jonimitchell.com/library/view.cfm?id=1821 — Joan Baez enmity

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coyote_(song) Joni brief affair w Sam Shephard 1975-6. n tour w Dylan

https://musicoholics.com/song-meanings/an-ode-to-men-joni-mitchells-songs-about-lovers-and-pals/ joni’s songs on lovers + pals

1974, FOUNTAIN OF SORROW (jackson Browne/ Late for the Sky ): The song is generally assumed to have been inspired by Browne's brief relationship with Joni Mitchell.  https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fountain_of_Sorrow

https://www.theatlantic.com/entertainment/archive/2013/02/why-joni-mitchells-blue-is-the-greatest-relationship-album-ever/273147/

https://performingsongwriter.com/graham-nash-our-house/

https://flowerandthevine.wordpress.com/2013/05/14/sweet-inspiration-joni-mitchell-and-graham-nash/

Songs by Joni about GRAHAM NASH:

Willy (Ladies of the Canyon)

My Old Man (Blue) 

River (Blue) — she wants to breakup even though she loves him

Songs by Graham Nash about JOni

Our House (CSNY, Deja Vu)

I Used to Be a King (Songs for Beginners, Graham Nash’s Solo album)        was a reference to Joni’s “I Had a King”

Sleep Song (Songs for Beginners)

Simple Man (Songs for Beginners)    “I just want to hold you, I don’t want to hold you down”:

NEIL YOUNG wrote Only Love Can Break Your Heart" for his friend Graham

‘Blue’ was written in aftermath of Mitchell’s relationship with Graham Nash, (CSN) and during an intense connection with James Taylor. 

https://www.goalcast.com/joni-mitchell-blue-will-make-you-braver-and-more-honest/

https://thehudsonindependent.com/a-simple-man-graham-nash-to-play-at-tarrytown-music-hall-in-july/

“The great thing about this coun­try is that you are able to speak your mind,” said Nash, who be­came a U.S. cit­i­zen in 1978. ... in the USA you’re al­lowed to say what you think.”

https://www.theculturecrush.com/feature/no-regrets-coyote

No matter how much audiences, lovers, and critics wanted to hold onto her, define her, she resisted such definition; she was never anybody’s but her’s. The Joni Mitchell we get—the one she chooses to reveal—is the one we sit beside as we put our earphones on and press play

https://faroutmagazine.co.uk/joni-mitchell-song-that-blew-away-david-crosby/

‘A Case Of You’ is so open and so her. She’s telling you the truth. And she utterly hooks you from that conversation at the start of the song: ‘If you want me I’ll l be in the bar.’ It’s a tough woman, who’s got her dukes up about life, and she’s got an opinion, and that’s Joni.”

Crosby continued: “That line: ‘I could drink a case of you and still be on my feet.’ There’s a duality there that’s deliberate. On the one hand, she’s saying she can’t get enough of him. But she’s also telling him, You can’t bowl me over. Because you know she’s been through some serious trials and tribulations. Polio, Chuck Mitchell – not a good experience.

http://www.memoriesofleonard.com/joni-mitchell/

JM’s thoughts on L Cohen, over the years

https://jonimitchell.com/music/song.cfm?id=48

Last time I saw richard NOT about her ex, Chuck Mitchell.  It’s an idea that grew out of a conversation, 'Oh, Joni, you're a hopeless romantic. There's only one way for you to go. Hopeless cynicism. And that was it That one little nugget became that song." In the song, Richard marries a figure skater and becomes a homebody.

https://www.jonimitchell.com/library/view.cfm?id=2734

Jackson Browne played a big role in Joni's life during the Court and Spark period. How much of an influence was he on the songs that made it to that album? Jackson Browne was the one guy who really seriously got to her in a very painful way. They met and she fell in love with him at her near-nadir, depression-wise. He was just becoming famous, he was younger than she, and he is VERY good looking. He got to her. They fought quite a bit. He started cheating on her with Phyllis Majors, a beautiful blond model he would eventually marry and have a child with (and who would then commit suicide!). "

Car On A Hill" is a veiled description of a night Joni waited and waited for him to show up and he didn't because he was with Phyllis. Joni then staged what she has called a "suicide attempt," David Geffen rescued her and, having hit bottom, her healing then began. The details of this little known incident are in my book.

"The Same Situation"-it was "Joni's Warren Beatty song, just as "You're So Vain" was Carly's."  I was told this by a boyfriend of hers who was around when Joni was dating Beatty. I describe it in the book - he's the bored playboy throwing himself on her as he did, serially, on any woman of the hour. Diane Keaton describes it well in her memoir: "When he comes after you, you can't say no." He, in his un-hip-to-her, "Let's talk about everything" cerebral mode, gets her to reveal what she'd rather keep inside. He's "like the church, like a cop, like a mother," in being authority-figure-like threatening to her in this regard. 

https://www.songfacts.com/facts/jackson-browne/ready-or-not#

READY OR NOT, (Everyman, 1973, written in 1972?) Browne wrote "Ready Or Not" about Phyllis Major, a model and actress for whom he had ended a relationship with Joni Mitchell. Major was also pregnant with Browne's child at the time. When Major heard it for the first time, she was furious as she thought it unfairly cast her as somebody who had designs on domestic life. "She hated that song," Browne recalled to Mojo. "She said, 'I wasn't having a baby to get you. And the bulls--t about the washing machine is just insulting. So f--k you.'"

https://www.conservativewoman.co.uk/after-blue-what-joni-did-next/

FOR THE ROSES — breakup w JT, get together  w JB, then quickly disintegrates. JT wrote “You can close your eyes” about JOni and her insomnia on Mud Slide Slim

Joni’s relationship with Jackson Browne was turbulent and short-lived. As I related in the previous piece about him, she was waiting for him to visit her one evening when he went for a drink at the Troubadour bar in West Hollywood and intervened in an argument between model Phyllis Major and her boyfriend. There was a punch-up, and Phyllis went home with Browne (they later married). When he failed to show up, Joni is said to have attempted suicide by taking pills and cutting herself. She denies this, but Geffen corroborates it.

After a period in residential therapy, Joni moved back into Geffen’s palatial Hollywood home... Trouble Child, inspired by her time in therapy – ‘up in a sterilised room where they let you be lazy’. 

Court and Spark, which took almost a year to record, was released in early 1974.

[sibunaranks]

HOA characters and the crime they are most likely to commit in their life......

I decided not to put murder here. I feel like given the right circumstance a lot of them could murder. Also might wanna make that it's own list....so...yeah no murder.

Nina - Trespassing - She's done it before and she'll do it again. She's too curious and naturally drawn to things from being the chosen one.

Fabian - Lying under oath - Fabian would do anything and everything to protect the secrets of the house, Sibuna, and the Egyptian world. Including lying in court. He's not great at it, but he's not gonna confess anything to anyone not involved.

Amber - Stealing - Amber has no qualms about doing bad things for the better good. If she needs something and can justify it she's taking it. It's never for fun, it always has a purpose, kinda like when she took the book from the library.

Alfie - Pickpocketing - Alfie is good at magic and slight of hand. Pickpocketing is easy for him and something he likes to do just for kicks sometimes. He usually grabs candy and food. He'd never take money or anything big and serious. His favorite thing he ever got is a glow in the dark yo-yo.

Patricia - Assault - Does this shock anyone? Throwing a drink is ASSAULT. She never grows out of this. I'd honestly not be shocked if she took it further and threw some hands.

Eddie - Illegal Possession of firearms - Eddie may have lost his Osirian powers but he still feels like he needs to be able to protect the group and the people around him. Without his powers, he decided to step it up and get a handgun. Unfortunately unlike where he's from, England sees this as a big no-no. He has no regrets about wanting to have one when he has crazy people always around threatening their lives and the world.

Jerome - Scamming - Any kind of scam he can do he will. He loves money and has no real conscious. He's grown out of scamming friends but strangers are totally an option.

Mara - Vandalism - Mara is a big revenge person. If you cross her you will end up with a keyed car and slashed tires. She only does it with a purpose but she takes it a bit far.

Mick - Tax Fraud - he got a lot of his family's money when he got to a certain age. He was always taught by family to skimp on taxes and fraud. He is wary but he still does it to an extent (less than his family)

Joy - Bribery - Joy likes getting her way. She's not above bribing people in order to have the cards fall in her favor.

KT - Overstaying a Visa - When KT visits her friends in England she always has such a good time she ends up extending the trip and therefor overstaying her visa.

Willow - Illegal possession of animals - She def has some animals in her life that aren't supposed to be owned. She doesn't mean anything bad, but it's still illegal no matter how good she is to them.

[youknowyouhaveadhdwhen]

I hate feeling lonely omg😭

I feel so disconnected from everyone.

My friends have been distant

The girl I was “dating” has always been distant but I accepted it bec the thrill of reading into her actions figuring out of shes playing games was exciting. I wasn’t happy lol.. but it kept my brain preoccupied for the last 8 months!!! I took everything I didnt like bec I knew this wouldnt last forever bec of the way she acts. But I reallly loved the good parts and it made me feel something during this pandemic.

I didn’t see her alot, but looking forward to the next date and next time I got to cuddle with her all night was fun. The actual date was great. Kt was nice being held , kissed and touched. Then being able to tell my friends about the date and being happy about it.

For the past 8 months I had stories to tell. My life was so boring before, I finally had something new and interesting to consider and discuss. New things to wonder about.

Last weekend too many things happened with the girl. I felt like I did not matter and I couldn’t accept that she barely cared about me anymore. I snapped and no longer thought about how it was great to get out of the house because of her. I ended it. Felt guilty when she told me she didn’t mean it. Idk what emotions even came into play. Maybe RSD. Even tho the stuff was actually problematic. I asked like 10 million ppl to make sure it wasnt just me.

Now I regret ending things. I wish I held on just so I wouldn’t be lonely. We barely spent time together, but in the past 8 months my mind was always on her. It feels weird to not have that to stress about. I keep crying each time I think about it. I have never dated before. She was the first person to give me a slight bit of attn. So I guess It would be alot.

I feel so pathetic that I wanted to hold on to someone who often forgot about me just so I can have something to do sometimes.

When is the next time I will cuddle with someone? Who knows when!!😭

[nakey-cats-take-bathsss]

Whether you’ve been here for 7 years or 7 days, who’s one person/blog that you feel lucky to have met?

I was tagged by @changingthefairy-tale and @burninghoneyatdusk who are legit two of my favorite people in this fandom.

I’m going to do lots of small shouts I think because I have so much love in my heart for y’all wow. I’m a big words of affirmation person so if you ever need me I’m happy to love on y’all because you all deserve it.

@elora-lane I don’t even know where to begin. I’ve never had an online friend as true as you. KT came into my life when I got the absolute meanest comment on What Happens in Vegas and was so discouraged that I was convinced I was a terrible writer and wanted to quit. But she left me such kind encouragement even though we didn’t really know each other and has been one of the most genuine, kind hearted and most wonderful people I have been lucky enough to meet. From beta-ing my fics to constant encouragement, life talks and everything in between...my 2020 would not have been the same without you. My life is a little brighter with you in it!

@obviesbellarke you leave the most fabulous, all caps comments on everything I write and I cannot begin to tell you how much it means to me. Thank you for the encouragement, for your kind words, for always cheering me on and being in my corner. I adore you!

@burninghoneyatdusk I have so much respect for you as a writer and as a person. The 100 writers for BLM is such a great initiative that took a lot of work to get off the ground and I am very much blessed to be a part of it. As a writer, I think your style is so beautful, your world building and narrative crafting is on par with most published work. Having someone I admire so much as an author friend has been a really meaningful experience for me. Thanks for being you, I hope you keep writing forever I’ll buy whatever you sell.

@changingthefairy-tale it’s rare I get to talk candidly to another mixed person and I loved our little talk about our experiences that one time. Thank you for loving Instant Family as much as I do and supporting my writing, it means more than I could ever truly express. You also always always always make me absolutely crack up, you are such a light in this corner of the fandom and I’ve loved getting to know you through bellarke. I love your fics, your takes and your amazing self!

@queenemori and @mobi-on-a-mission my bubbles and buttercup, my memori yodas, you are both such wonderful, bright and encouraging people. I love both of your writing, you made me fall in love with a ship entirely through fic, which I didn’t even know was possible. Thank you for always supporting my dabbles and pushing me to try new things in writing. You are both amazing humans and I’m soooooo happy ive gotten to know you both, I have a lot of love for both of you.

@ninappon thank you for your incredible support, kind comments and encouragement always. It means a great deal and I always love reading what you have to say.

I could go on for days, genuinely I feel so grateful for y’all. No matter how this all ends and how things are going down, I don’t regret a second of it because it gave me all of you and for that, my heart is very full. Tagging some other wonderful people.

@animmortalist | @dayo488 | @bellamyblakru | @geekyogicheese | @infp-with-all-the-feelings | @natassakar | @thefangirlingbarista | @wolf4747 | @itsmevickyb

And to everyone who has read, supported or commented on my writing, I cannot begin to thank you enough. I will never be able to articulate how much love I have for all of you, truly. To all y’all, your art and the work you love is YOURS, nobody can take that away from you...ever.

[katherinemallory]

#5 Everyone’s got their own soft spot

Things have got quite complicated... If you want to know how, check it here: #1 #2 #3 #4

I kept shouting his name, but he ignored me. His silver Aston Martin DB10 has quickly disappeared. Great, I thought. I am soaking wet... And Bond seems to know my deepest, darkest secret. This is even worse than being out of active service.

I went up the stairs to my apartment. It turned out that I had difficulties with putting the key into the keyhole as my hands were shaking. I didn't know what I wanted to do, I didn't know anything, I was so overwhelmed. I just dreamed of taking a *really* long bath. A bath so long that it would take a week, and no one could disturb me... But before I took my wet clothes off, I searched my bag, looking for my phone. I checked on Amanda.

“Hello, this is Amanda Clarke speaking.”

It was the first time I've heard her real surname.

“Amanda, it's me, Katherine,” I uttered, feeling that my body was still shaking. Somehow I managed to keep my voice sweet. “It's good to hear you... Is everything alright? You didn't want to talk to me earlier.”

For a while there was no response.

“Yeah... I'm sorry, Kath,” she said like a person who doesn't have any hope left. “I'm really sorry I ruined everything.”

It was simply painful to hear that defeated tone.

“Hey, Amanda, you did ruin nothing. I asked how do *you* feel?”

There was a long moment of silence again.

“Honestly... I don't know anymore,” said Amanda, and then began to cry. “It was a-all my fault! I-I ruin-ned our mission and n-n-now... the whole se-e-ection is endange-e-red... it's-s... a nightmare,” she sobbed. “E-even M didn't spe-eak to me f-f-for long... H-he wa-anted me ou-ut of the-e office as soon a-as we e-e-entered...”

“Listen, it's not that,” I replied. “Surely he was angry, but believe me, not as angry as he could have been... I assume he just didn't expect us to get in trouble,” I kept wandering around my apartment, talking to Amanda as if I wanted to convince both her and myself that nothing serious has happened. “M will get over it soon. He knows the nature of our job. Just give him time,” I added in a single breath.

“T-t-thanks, Kath... it m-mea-ans a lot... and how-w are-e you...?”

I stopped in front of a mirror that was hanging on the wall next to my bedroom’s door. Hair: wet. Clothes: wet. Mood: would punch anyone who'd be standing near.

“Fine,” I sighed, “apart from the fact I just had an argument with Bond.”

“Wh-hat happene-ed??”

As soon as I realized what I've just confessed, I regretted it. From now on I had to be more cautious. No one could know the truth... or perhaps one person could, but definitely not one of the double-0s. And apart from that, Amanda’s got bigger problems on her mind than some pathetic life stories.

“Nevermind... You wouldn't believe me anyway... just some spy stuff.”

...

I took a long bath as I had planned, then changed into my pyjamas and went to bed. I felt like doing absolutely nothing, but there was one thing I couldn't take off my mind.

Despite being pretty angry at him, I tried to call Bond three times. And guess what, every single time my call went to voicemail. I quickly gave up and sent him a message instead:

James, I know you're upset, but we have to talk. I hope you’ll meet me when you're back... please take care of yourself.

KT

I looked at my phone once again (just to make sure that I have sent the message), and felt that my eyelids began to close...

...

I woke up early the next day, even though I did not set the alarm clock. Perfect, I thought just after I have woken up, I don’t have to hurry. It’s going to be a long day and I have plenty of time to prepare myself for it.

I looked at my phone to check if Bond has answered me. As there were still no new messages, I had only one option left: the smart-blood programme.

Hi Q, it’s Kath. Has James landed in Maldives already?

There was a response within a minute.

Hello Kath. I’m sorry, but I promised James that I’d not tell anyone except M. Hope you’ll have a good day.

I glanced over the message a couple of times in disbelief. Mr. Bond pretends not to care anymore... Bastard, I said to myself as I went to the bathroom.

The fact I got suspended from any field operations, didn't necessarily mean that I didn’t have to show up at the MI6 Headquarters - there was plenty of paper work, waiting there for me and Amanda... M didn’t give us any days off (unlike he did with other double-0s), and it felt like a punishment... A punishment we deserved without a doubt.

I wanted to look elegantly that day. Not only because I needed to improve my mood after recent events, but also because of my meeting with Eve. I always liked to dress-up for the meetings with my friends. I was really looking forward to our dinner, as I missed her dearly when I was in Switzerland. And, what is more, it was her whom I wanted to tell everything about my disagreement with Bond.

There was this gossip spreading in the double-0 section that Eve was head over heels in love with Bond, but I didn’t quite believe it. When we all met on my first day after promotion, I got an impression that from the whole double-0 section it was Bond himself who was most convinced of the rumours' genuineness. He assumed that Moneypenny had a huge crush on him, but Eve didn’t seem too worried about Bond taking me on a date. She didn’t try to interrupt him when he was talking to me, and, what is more, she didn’t even seem interested in our conversation. Maybe Eve was a good actress after all, but my instincts told me something weird was going on there.

I have chosen one of my least favourite suits - a bottle green one (I was never a big fan of that colour, but I guess I’ve changed my mind a bit after realizing *someone’s eyes* were green...) - and a white shirt. Simple, but not too classic. Ideal to make a statement, I thought as I took the last sip of my morning cup of Earl Grey.

...

Both me and Amanda were quite busy with all the paper work we had to do that morning, but we didn't complain. We obediently accepted the "punishment", even though it took its toll... After a few hours of intense work, I decided to take Eve for lunch as I had promised her the day before.

I went through the long corridor on the last floor that led to M’s office. It was a lovely, sunny morning and the walls were *radiant* because of the sunshine that was coming through the windows. Even the colour of the door at the end of the corridor appeared to be a bit more brighter that day.

When I came in, M was standing next to Moneypenny’s desk. He was holding a few pieces of paper, probably some important documents, and it looked like he was telling her a story. M stopped talking, and they both looked in my direction. Eve was a bit astonished, but Mallory smiled at me mildly, almost imperceptibly.

“Good morning, sir,” I said, feeling both uncomfortable and excited to have met Mallory unexpectedly. “Hi, Eve.”

“Morning, 002,” replied Mallory. “Did you come here to see me or Miss Moneypenny?”

His voice sounded warm and gentlemanly. I could tell he was in a good mood.

“I came to see Eve, sir. Forgive me, if I’m intruding, I can come back later...”

“No, it’s fine. Miss Moneypenny can take some time off,” he looked at her, and then at his watch. “It’s time for lunch after all.”

“Thank you, sir,” said Eve, then stood up and walked around her desk. "Hi, Katherine," she added, touching my right arm.

M gave us a glance and put his hand on the doorknob. He was just about to go inside his office.

“Oh, sir,” I said shyly, but loud enough for him to notice. “I actually wanted to ask you something...”

“Yes, 002?” he responded as he turned his head towards me.

Damn, today he’s more hot than ever, I thought. He was wearing a very dark (definitely not black) suit, and one of his blue shirts, but I couldn’t take my eyes off his hair. It looked a little different than usual as Mallory was standing in front of the room's window. The sunlight highlighted his receding hairline and made me focus on the colour of his hair. His magnetic green eyes were observing my face, while he was waiting to hear my question. It was a wonderful moment. I wanted it to last forever.

“Katherine, I’ll wait for you outside,” announced Eve and left us alone.

I followed her with my eyes and then looked directly at Mallory. So hot... if only I could... Damn, Kath! Stop it. Don’t forget that he is your supervisor. And you’ve got a question to ask.

“Sir... has 007 reported to you already? Has he landed in Maldives safely?”

Mallory raised his right eyebrow. The questions surprised him.

“No,” he said calmly, “not yet, but I’m sure he’ll do that soon.”

He glanced at me suspiciously.

“Are you really *that* worried about him?” he asked in his most kind manner, putting the documents on Eve’s desk. Then he leaned against the wall next to the door to his office.

“No, sir,” I lied. “But we had an argument yesterday and I wanted to make sure he’s alright.”

“And do you think I know if Bond’s alright better than the man himself? Try to contact him.”

“I tried many times, sir,” I blurted, “but he ignores me... it seems like he has disappeared...”

Mallory was still very polite, but acted indifferent.

“It’s the fate of glass to break... well maybe it’s the fate of spies to just disappear,” he said slowly.

“Perhaps, sir, but he was really furious...”

At first, Mallory seemed like he really tried to understand my point of view. But I was dead sure he wouldn’t agree with me. He looked through the window and sighed while I was still explaining my concerns. The light hit Mallory’s eyes. He interrupted me, sounding semi-friendly.

“002, please behave like a professional,” Mallory instructed me in his deep, dry voice, as he picked up the documents from the table. “Private business between you and Bond is not a concern of mine. Save your energy for your main objective for today. There's plenty of paper work to deal with.”

Harsh. He went from being understanding to uncompromising very quickly. I looked down and blushed.

"I promise we’ll get the work done, sir.”

I noticed him smile as I lifted up my face to meet his eyes.

“Bond will be fine. Don’t worry,” said Mallory dryly. “Is that all...?”

“Yes, sir. Thank you.”

“See you later then, 002. And please remember your lunch with Miss Moneypenny shouldn’t take longer than half an hour.”

...

I agreed to meet Eve outside the MI6 Headquarters, so I took the elevator and went the way down. I couldn’t stop to think about Mallory... I’ve been analyzing the way he spoke to me just a few minutes ago. He sent me a lot of mixed signals. At first he was so understanding, and then he just *had* to remind me of my professionalism... Clearly he wasn’t satisfied with some private stuff going on between me and Bond. And I don't blame M - I can’t imagine myself as the Head of MI6 who has to deal with some conflict, or worse - romance, between my two double-0s...

I went outside and saw Eve, who was wearing a checkered coat and looking more adorable than ever.

“I’m sorry, Eve, I just *had* to talk to M for a while,” I said, being ashamed of myself that I made her wait for me.

“Please, don’t apologize, Kath,” she replied as she took my arm. “Now I’ve got you all for myself. Let’s go!”

“Now we look like a proper couple!” I said, as I turned my head to her and we burst into laughter.

...

We didn’t have unlimited time for our dinner, so we stopped at an Italian restaurant just around the corner. We could have eaten together in one of the cafes in the MI6 building, but we didn’t want to. It was safer to go somewhere more private. Obviously, leaving the SIS building couldn’t guarantee not being eavesdropped by one of your colleagues, but without a doubt it reduced the probability.

“So, Eve, how are you?” I asked, just after we both ordered our meals. “How was the life in the MI6 recently? Tell me everything.”

“Oh, it was nothing special. All the fun has gone together with you!” Eve giggled. “I had a lot of paper work to do, as usual, because nearly the whole double-0 section was away... and Bond kept coming to me and repeatedly asked about your reports to M...” she rested her left hand on the table and placed her head on the hand. “Of course I didn’t inform him of anything. He was convinced that I was aware of the content of the reports, but it’s not true. All the reports always go directly to M. And M forbids me from reading them. I'm sure Bond knows that as a double-0...”

She paused for a moment when the waiter came to our table with her glass of still water.

“And M... he has been quite nervous since you and Amanda left for Geneva...”

She gave me a glance and took a sip from her glass.

“... I don't know why, but he has been kind of irritated all the time,” she continued, looking directly at me. “And it all culminated when the Chief of the Swiss intelligence informed him of the planned kidnapping. It seemed like he was very concerned about that mission. He reacted immediately..."

“Yeah, I noticed his immediate reaction," I laughed, looking at the table. "You probably shouldn’t be telling me that.”

“Yeah, I shouldn’t,” added Eve. “But when you work with him every day...” she hesitated, “... you get a bit tired. It's not because of him, but rather all the stuff that is always going on... It can be really stressful sometimes, and after a few intense weeks in a row you feel exhausted... I have *no idea* how M is still capable of leading this whole organization... those emotions can drive you *crazy* if you let them... at the end of the day you have to vent to someone.”

"I get it," I replied, scratching my right hand. "You can vent to me whenever you feel like venting. I wouldn't want you to go crazy."

"Thanks, Kath. It feels good to know someone cares for your own sanity.”

The waiter came again, this time bringing our dinner.

“Speaking of M,” I trembled, “there is something I *have* to tell you.”

"I'm all ears."

“I know that... we don’t know each other for long, but... you’re the only one I trust with this...”

And I told her *everything*. How I left the double-0 section meeting with Bond, how he confessed his feelings for me, and how he accused me of having a crush on M.

"So, what's your opinion on this?” I asked when I finished the story.

“It’s no big deal,” said Eve. “Everyone’s got their own soft spot.”

“I do not follow you.”

“Oh, Katherine,” she replied. “It’s obvious. You’re Bond’s soft spot. And... it seems like M’s yours.”

I looked her straight in the eye, but quickly moved my sight to the flowers in a little vase that was standing on our table. Eve continued to talk.

“Yeah, I remember exactly what you’ve told me *that* day: ‘I’m not interested in men at my age’... And the look on your face when you left his office... I could tell there was something more in your eyes than just the excitement before the mission. Something more... private,” said Eve, looking at my shocked face. “Then this Christmas present.... and Bond’s jealousy. It all fits together.”

She left me speechless for a while.

“I just... I just hope it’s not too obvious...”

“I have no idea, Kath. But perhaps Bond noticed your behaviour because he’s interested in you,” she speculated. “Do you think he really had his reasons to figure it all out?"

“I’m not sure... but probably yes,” I confessed with a worried look on my face. “I told him how M let me chose my double-0 number, how he reacted to the present... Do you think for Bond it was enough?”

“Judging by the way you stared at M earlier today, I think it might have been enough.”

“Hey, I wasn’t staring at him...”

Eve smirked and started to shake her head.

“Right...” I said. “Thanks for being honest with me, Eve.”

I felt really embarrassed.

“Do you think it’s wrong?” I asked, sounding pretty concerned about my romantic feelings.

“Wrong? There’s always some excitement associated with a love triangle!” quipped Eve.

“No, Eve... I’m serious,” I insisted, while looking at the other tables, making sure no one observed us. Even though we were at some random restaurant, I was scared that there might have been someone from the SIS. “Is... is it wrong that I fell for M?”

She smiled at me mildly.

“No. It’s not wrong,” she assured me. “But you'll have to be very careful with what you do about it. Anything you do right now might make things very much complicated.”

...

After the dinner we came back to the MI6 Headquarters, as we both had a lot to deal with. We said goodbye in the main corridor. Eve left for M’s office and I left for the paper work.

“Thanks so much for listening to me, Eve. I just... I just hope that talking about Bond didn’t bother you...”

“No, it’s perfectly fine. You were right to assume it’s just a stupid rumour.”

“It is?”

“Yeah,” said Eve. “It used to be true, but it’s not true anymore... I have to go, Kath. I’m already three minutes late and M’s going to kill me!” exclaimed Eve, and then gave me a hug. “And don’t worry much. We’ll come up with the solution.”

“Thank you, Eve. You’re the best,” I replied, as I placed my head on her shoulder and returned the hug. I closed my eyes for a moment.

“Miss Moneypenny,” said a male, stern voice, “would you mind coming back to work?”

I opened my eyes and saw Mallory who has just appeared in front of me out of nowhere.

“I’m s-s-sorry, sir... I’m coming,” said Eve quietly.

Mallory didn’t reply and they headed towards the elevator. I watched them until the elevator’s door have closed.

Eve’s such a great person, I thought. What a relief... I’ve told her everything and now I feel a lot better. But should I feel any better...? I’m in the middle of some stupid love triangle and there is nothing to be proud of. It’s not even a triangle since it’s only Bond who is interested in me.

How is it possible what whenever Bond leaves, I miss him dearly, but when he is close I can’t think of anyone else but Mallory? And when I see Mallory I can barely think straight?

Time to get back to work.

***

To be continued.

[rkxhyunjin]

September Decision

A staff member leads you down KT’s winding hallways to Katie Lee’s office, then opens the door and leads you inside, where the CEO awaits, sitting at her desk. She observes you as you’re instructed by the staff member to take a seat. Next to your chair, is a company lawyer whom you recognize from before; he’d been present when you signed your initial company contract. The staff member then leaves the room. You hear the door close and the latch click back into place just as your CEO finally decides to speak up.

“I’m very glad you are here today because it means you have finally achieved our goal, haven’t you? Trainees come here and sign away their two-year contracts with hope of one day making to where you are right now, but not everybody makes it.” She says it all with a serene smile. “Your years of training are what got you here.”

“You stood out from the others, even if you also had your ups and downs. What’s important is that you managed to get yourself back on your in feet and kept on improving.” She pauses, and diverts her attention to her desk, where she shuffles paperwork until she sets one singular sheet of paper in front of her. “I’ve been proud of your growth here, and I trust you to do your best to continue to improve, even after debut. This, here,” she says, motioning towards the document, “is a contract exclusive to NSG and will tie you to this group, and to KT Entertainment, for the next six years.”

There is no sign of regret on her features as she slides the contract toward you and hands you a pen. “If we share the same vision of making NSG the next boy group of the world, and you wish to be a part of this journey, you know what to do.”

Maybe it ought to concern Hyunjin, that he had signed himself over so easily as a trainee and that he was so willing to do it all over again. Of course, he had put thought into the decision, had internally expressed his doubts along the way. But in the end, it wouldn’t have mattered if he had spent an extra year trying to decide whether to sign the contract, or had simply walked in and been handed a pen. The decision was almost inevitable: Hyunjin would sign.

However precarious his place on stage may be (as this industry was far from the stability he had always strove to reach), it was still a place that he wanted. A place that a younger version of himself had kept hidden away, placed on a pedestal of hopes and dreams he secretly worried he would never truly reach with every passing day. Even as he pens his name in ink, there’s still the possibility that he won’t reach that dream.

Nothing guarantees success in this industry. Big companies such as KT give you a leg up, but even still tens or even hundreds of people just like him come and go from the stage every year. There is no true guarantee. But maybe it’s that bit of risk that secretly excites him.

Certainly, the risk scares Hyunjin right down to his bones. Leaves his fingers fidgeting and his senses far too sensitive to the stimulating environment around him as anxiety presses in close. Yet at the same time, risk is new for Hyunjin. Stepping down this new path, forging one that isn’t planned and planted with subtle misery until the day he passes away, is so freeing. 

So the decision to sign the contract was hardly a decision at all. It was his first step fully down a new path that included his own happiness for once. Hyunjin was done making choices that put his happiness second, and this was just the beginning.

mun note: sorry I completely lost track of time and didn’t even notice the deadline was coming up (and passed)! if he’s still allowed to accept even though it’s late, thank you for allowing the late submission (´；ω；`). but if not I understand since there was a specified deadline there!   

OOC NOTE: First of all, congratulations on arriving at the final step before debut! I know it’s been a long and crazy journey, and I’m so glad you’ve stuck through it. When you are ready, feel free to post this prompt with Hyunjin’s response to it.

Should Hyunjin choose to SIGN the NSG contract, he will be employed by KT Entertainment without a need to renew a contract until the duration of this one has concluded. As a reward for making it this far, he will receive THREE WEEKENDS unpaid vacation time to use any time between now and the end of December, so long as it doesn’t clash with any special debut activities (such as music show appearances, meaning he can’t actually use her vacation time until after her music show performances have finished.)

Should he choose to REJECT this contract with KT and NSG, he will leave the company, effective immediately upon rejection. He will be able to keep all of his debut points, but will not be able to take any trainee workshops or earn any more debut points/workshop points until he becomes a trainee again. He will not have any special advantage over newer characters when he auditions for other companies in the future, and should he become a trainee at a new company he will be considered a junior trainee all over again, even though he will still have his debut points and would be eligible for debut right away. He WILL have the right to audition for KT again, but the fact that he gave up a contract renewal, especially a debut one, WILL be taken into account in final casting decisions.

He will have up to one week to make his decision IC, meaning that if he does not make a decision by September 19th, he will automatically be cut from the company. Exceptions can be made for those on hiatus.

[dashuisofanubis]

Another ghost AU

Okay the premise for this one is sort of a what if they figured out Nina was the chosen one and performed the ritual, but its also an AU.

KT, Eddie and Willow move into a boarding house for the prestigious Ankh school. They notice there are a lot of awards and items in the school dedicated to a group of students.

It turns out that on the 7th of July, around 50 years ago, these 7 students were discovered dead. The cause was believed to be poisoning as the students were all from the same house and the two surviving students admitted to having skipped meals at the house that day. The house mother was arrested and sentenced for murder, despite rumours that she was innocent.

The truth of the tale is different:

An ancient Egyptian artefact was believed to have power beyond scientific knowledge, and, once assembled, was said to grant immortality. However, nature must maintain a balance, and for every life extended, another has to be cut short.

Despite all their research, the Secret Society were not aware of these consequences, or most likely were at some level but chose to ignore it. So, when the ritual took place and life was transferred, they had what they wanted, but at a cost.

The Immortals:

Victor Rodenmaar. Location unknown. Has been off the grid for 25 years after vanishing one night in the middle of the school year

Daphne Andrews. Still a teacher at Ankh. Taught many student's parents and has said she will retire next year for the past 20 years

Eric Sweet. Eddie's father, and a man he's always admired and looked up to. He's not what he seems, and is a lot older than Eddie believed.

Mercer, father to one of the lost students. Has realised immortality is not all it's cracked up to be. Having lost his wife 10 years ago, he lives a lonely life and regrets ever joining the society and offering up his daughter.

Jason Winkler. Joined due to degenerative illness, hoping this would be a cure. It was, and he lives a mostly happy life, when he can forget what part he played in the tragedy.

Doctor Delia. Now the CEO of the local hospital, she's experimented with her immortality, to see if there is a way to transfer part of her life to a patient. It took a lot of work, but 11 years ago, she finally had some success. 14 year old Sophia was fatally injured in a car crash, and Dr Delia used her blood in a transfusion, saving the girl.

Rufus Zeno is the final immortal. It was supposed to be Roebuck, but Rufus broke in and threatened the Chosen One, unless he got what he wanted. Wanting to save the girl, and being the only one who hadn't drunk from the cup, Roebuck sacrificed his chance.

(Had he known the girl would die anyway, it might have been different)

Rufus is out there, somewhere, and he's dangerous.

Back to the story:

(Idk what the plot really is but here goes)

The trio (Eddie, KT and Willow) discover the students used to live in Anubis House.

One night, they're playing truth or dare with their housemates: Stella, Marco, Anna, Raf and Peter. KT is dared to go down into the cellar, where she finds a secret panel. Behind it, she finds 7 balancing scales, an intricately decorated cup, and an empty bottle.

The scales have discs with names written on them. The names match those of the 7 students who died. However, the discs are only on one side of the scales, suggesting there were 7 more previously. KT takes the bottle to prove she went into the basement, and something compels her to take the discs as well, which she shows to Willow once they're back in their room.

They let Eddie know about it the next morning and the 3 begin to wonder if the students' deaths were really as they seemed.

Eddie is walking up the stairs when he trips on a loose floorboard. Annoyed, he goes to try and put it back into place when something catches his eye. It's a metal disc, tarnished with age. He cleans it up and sees the word Zeno printed on it.

He tells KT and Willow, and KT realises it must be from the scales she found. Something doesn't feel right, so they decide to investigate.

Eddie jokingly suggests they hold a seance, and despite Willows warnings, they do.

It doesn't seem to work.

The next day, Willow discovers an intruder in the house, someone who looks very similar to photos in the school...

Willow is unnerved but curious, so she says hey to them. They turn around, apparently spooked that someone can see them, and vanish.

Willow tells the others, who initially disbelieve her, but soon they come to meet the former residents of their boarding house.

The ghosts were obviously affected by their own deaths, and the fact that they're ghosts, but it's been 50 years now, so they're getting over it. They generally try to stay out of the students' ways, as they learnt that people generally freak out at the sight of ghosts.

They appeared as ghosts the same moment their lives transferred to the immortals, but were extremely weak and found it hard to keep themselves together. They were unable to dissipate completely though, something was keeping them there. They had to watch as Trudy was arrested; as their house was put out of action till an increase in students forced them to open it again 15 years later; as Victor still wandered the halls; as all the students came and grew and left while they were trapped in the house.

Unable to die, but unable to live.

Slowly, they began to gain more power, and for the past 10 years they've been able to hold a corporeal form for lengthening times, meaning they can actually do things and go places. They're capable of leaving the house for short distances and periods of time, though if they're out for too long they fade away and reappear back in the house with a killer headache.

They think (hope) this means the immortals are weakening, but it could just be they're getting used to the whole being dead thing.

Their lives were tied to the balancing scales and the person on the opposite side, so they each have some connection to an immortal

This means they get fleeting impressions/feelings from their immortal, which strengthens with their proximity.

Connected Immortal and Ghost:

Rodenmaar - Nina

Sweet - Fabian

Andrews - Amber

Delia - Alfie

Roebuck/Zeno - Jerome

Mercer - Joy

Winkler - Patricia

Amber gets the most impressions because Ms Andrews still teaches at the school

Nina and Jerome receive hardly any because both Zeno and Rodenmaar are unknowns

However, recently they've started getting fleeting emotions and visuals that aren't their own. The two missing immortals are becoming active and they're heading for the house.

The ghosts can't do much on their own so Eddie, KT and Willow have to be prepared to discover what these two immortals want and put a stop to it.

Eddie finds out that his dad was once Eric Sweet (he chose a different name after leaving the school, to distance himself), the former headmaster of the school and is horrified by the part he played in all this. A confrontation goes down.

There's a bit where they track down Mick and Mara, now in their 60s, and bring them back to Anubis House to reunite with their former housemates. It would be a really emotional scene because while most of them weren't close, you can't live in close quarters with people for a long time, without forming a bond. And when it ended so abruptly with no goodbyes...well.

They also track down the other immortals and bring them to the house to face their ghosts (literally). Ms Andrews regrets it immensely; Delia has no (some) regrets, but argues she's able to save many more lives this way, Jason is in denial.

Don't imagine immortal!Mercer finally seeing his daughter again, only she's a ghost and he caused her death. He's full of apologies, but they're all based around how he missed her, not how he cut her life short.

There would be a lot of regret and grief all round, and anger on the ghosts' part.

While Trudy probably wouldn't be alive after all this time, the trio and the ghosts want the immortals to clear her name.

Zeno and Rodenmaar arrive at the house. They're both searching for an ancient artefact hidden in the house.

(Is it the mask? Is it the Book of Isis? Robert Frobisher Smythe? Who knows? Not me.)

They also want to try and end the other because, why not. Grudges can last forever.

The trio also meet Sophia at some point, who is undergoing weird transitions as a result of the blood transfusion. Her body is fighting it while also trying to embrace it, and it causes her to randomly absorb life/energy from plants or other people. She can also transfer energy to other beings, but this causes her to collapse. She also still looks 14 when she should be in her 20s by now. The trio befriend her and try to figure out a cure.

While their existences are tainted with regret and bitterness, the ghosts still make their own fun. Sometimes they'll pull pranks on unsuspecting students, or just sit in the back of the class room to listen to the lessons like they're students again. They know for a fact Ms Andrews hasn't changed her curriculum in 50 years and can now recite her lessons by heart. They also like to play games in the house like tag or hide and seek, and they will admit its more fun when you can phase through walls.

When they reveal themselves to the trio, they enjoy tormenting them, but also help them with their games nights, charading the answers behind the other 5s backs. Everyone's had near misses with the 5, but somehow they remain oblivious to the SEVEN GHOSTS living in their house. But then again everyone else is oblivous to the fact the 5 are on some Arthurian quest.

I don't know how this story would end, but the best outcome is that they fight Zeno and Rodenmaar, and some truth comes out that Rodenmaar has discovered a way to reverse what was done and needs an artefact from the tunnels to conduct the ritual. Zeno, meanwhile has discovered another ritual that would give him the power from the other immortals to essentially make himself a god.

Naturally, both are trying to stop the other from achieving their goals.

Initially, KT, Eddie, Willow and the ghosts (and Sophia) attempt to stop both parties, but when they discover Victor's plan they work to take down Zeno. Once he's subdued (taken down by Sophia draining his energy), they summon the other 5 immortals.

Some of them take some convincing, but others are all too ready to give up this immortal life. They get time to tie off loose ends. Ms. Andrews hands in her resignation, Delia entrusts someone (Sophia?) with her work, Mercer has a long talk with his daughter, Eric has an even longer talk with his son. Victor spends his time in Anubis House, telling the kids his story and apologising for taking so long to fix his mistake.

Eventually, the ritual takes place, and the next day sees 7 new students enrolled who look uncannily like the students in the pictures.

(It takes them a while to adjust to the fact they can't walk through walls anymore)

[thesummerstorms]

001 | Send me a fandom and I will tell you my: For repcomm?

Favorite character:

I mean.. Etain. Obviously.

Least Favorite character:

Kal, but man does Jusik put himself in the running sometimes.

EDIT: HOW DID I FORGET JINART!

5 Favorite ships (canon or non-canon):

Etain/Dar, Jilka/Ruu, Maze/Zey, Atin/Laseema (altho I’m very multiship in this fandom so I like some other Atin ships too), Mereel&Etain or Mereel/Etain but only like in a poly or alt timeline au but I saw it and... it works? Even though Dar/Etain is my otp

Character I find most attractive:

I mean, they’re all book characters, so aesthetic attraction doesn’t have much chance to kick in, but Temuera Morrison is nice generally, I guess. And Gena & Izzy fancast Dichen Lachman for Besany & Dichen Lachman is STUNNING. 

Character I would marry:

hah. hah. they’d eat me alive. Well. Darman’s a sweetheart, but I could never. Etain is my heart, but I think we’d squabble.

I read Niner as demi-romantic or aro & ace, and I’m some flavor of “wtf is happening” aro & ace, so I could relate there,  and relate to the anxiety/grumpiness/feeling responsible but like, idk about long term compatibility.

OR I remember a fmk game one time where I chose “Jaing with the understanding it was some long-distance tax scheme and then we divorce amicably and go away rich/richer”. That still works.

Character I would be best friends with:

I would want to be friends with Etain or Darman or Niner (it might be a lot of fun to gossip w/ Niner, honestly) or Besany but again, my experiences/skill set/ level of interesting-ness are all kinda too far removed from theirs for them to have a reason to give me the time of day, much less bond.

a random thought:

what. the fuck. is. this timeline.

An unpopular opinion:

Unpopular in some parts of the fandom, but not in mine, but like. Kal. If you follow this blog, you know what I mean.

Jusik is three great moments and a whole bunch of annoying as shit authorial morality pronouncements in a trench coat. He had so much potential, but like Kal, lived up to less than none of it. And in his “Gotab” identity I want to throat punch him.

My Canon OTP:

Dar/Etain.

My Non-canon OTP:

Dar/Etain/Rhedian, or if not including OCs, Jilka/Ruusaan. It just has SO MUCH potential.

Most Badass Character:

I think a requirement to being on this main cast is being some flavor of bad ass. Etain the unexpectedly/deceptively tiny but fierce Jedi, Laseema who doesn’t have any military or special background but learns to defend herself and her place in the world  after a terrible past and keep up with all the people who do, Besany the treasury spy and Jilka her best friend who corners Hutts for a thrills,  any given clone who is automatically a super soldier by default... like... it’s a requirement. 

Most Epic Villain:

Uthan when allowed to be herself.

But for the record, I just had to sit and think and count “wait who’s the villain in each book” because with the exceptions of Hokan (who gets pov chapters and is shitty as hell), Uthan (who is ruthless as shit and a major player in the eventual cure), and Ko Sai (who is... Ko Sai)... most of the other folk on the other side of the battle field aren’t even villains, they’re just antagonists and they’re just... there. Which is a major departure for SW when you think about it.

So like, the choices here are only Ko Sai ( *thumbs down*), Hokan (little pretentious pos), and Uthan. Uthan a la Hard Contact wins easily.

Pairing I am not a fan of:

Fi/Parja majorly squicks me out except for when Kaz writes it. but like. Canon Fi/Parja has so many boundary issues that make me uncomfortable.

JUSIK/ARLA like WHAT THE FUCK. Biggest NOTP.

Gilamar/Uthan. A softer nope, because I’ve seen fanon versions done well, but not at all a fan of canon Gilamar/Uthan from 501st.

Ny/Kal because Ny did NOTHING to deserve that.

Character I feel the writers screwed up (in one way or another):

Hah! HAH! How much time you got?

Kal- not who KT thought she was giving us at all

Jusik a handful of great moments attached to what ultimately fails as a fleshed out, meaningful character with a lot of lost potential

Ovolot Qail ‘suddenly a middle age career woman who can be manipulated by her regret at never having ~children~ as soon as Kal looks at her’ Uthan. 

Parja, who has all this potential, but KT uses as a mouthpiece for some sexist/ablelist/uncomfortable shit.

Jilka- she can still be sharp/judgy/social/a tad vain, but just let her and Besany be friends and also avoid actively shoving her in a gold-digger sterotype in book 4 (book 3? when Ordo gives Besany the sapphire) and then a random out of the blue romance with Corr, of all people, to “soften her up” in ImpComm.

Jinart is not a character, she’s a whole bunch of mean shit the author wanted to say in black fur, and that makes it hard to feel at all sympathetic to or conflicted about the gurlanin, even when KT wants us too

Favourite Friendship:

oh god, I could NEVER choose just one. 

Niner & Dar and Dar & Fi & Atin & Etain (or what we have in those tiny implied moments) and Ordo & Mereel and Mereel & Etain and Ordo & Etain and Mereel & Besany , the hypothetical SNARK /GRUMP friendship in my head that would be Niner & Jilka, Maze & Ordo...

like... it’s all so good. they’re all so good. and there’s somebody I’m forgetting on my list here, I know it, but I just can’t think of it right now.

Character I most identify with:

I mean. *coughs* Do I.. do I really have to say this one?

Character I wish I could be:

Listen, I admire many of these character’s skills, but like HELL would I ever want to experience ANY of their backgrounds or life experiences.

[rkxrm]

A staff member leads you down KT’s winding hallways to Katie Lee’s office, then opens the door and leads you inside, where the CEO awaits, sitting at her desk. She observes you as you’re instructed by the staff member to take a seat. Next to your chair, is a company lawyer whom you recognize from before; he’d been present when you signed your initial company contract. The staff member then leaves the room. You hear the door close and the latch click back into place just as your CEO finally decides to speak up.

“I’m very glad you are here today because it means you have finally achieved our goal, haven’t you? Trainees come here and sign away their two-year contracts with hope of one day making to where you are right now, but not everybody makes it.” She says it all with a serene smile. “Your years of training are what got you here.”

“You stood out from the others, even if you also had your ups and downs. What’s important is that you managed to get yourself back on your in feet and kept on improving.” She pauses, and diverts her attention to her desk, where she shuffles paperwork until she sets one singular sheet of paper in front of her. “I’ve been proud of your growth here, and I trust you to do your best to continue to improve, even after debut. This, here,” she says, motioning towards the document, “is a contract exclusive to NSG and will tie you to this group, and to KT Entertainment, for the next six years.”

There is no sign of regret on her features as she slides the contract toward you and hands you a pen. “If we share the same vision of making NSG the next boy group of the world, and you wish to be a part of this journey, you know what to do.”

Walking down the hallways, he’s once again reminded that the last time he walked down this hallway was two years ago, to sign his renewal and his casual callout of katie lee’s mistreatment of him. He was rather happy with everything though now. He had a feeling that September would be the month for him. He walks in and takes a seat when he’s motioned to. He has prepared himself once again for the worst possible news, since it’s rare to be called in to the ceo’s office for  good news. He settles in his chair, and her words are sort of comforting. Yeah, he supposes that she is right on that. His years of training is what got him here. 

As she continues on, Namjoon smiles a bit. He really did struggle a lot and had his downs where he just doubted everything. Once she pauses, Namjoon leans forward in interest. Proud of his growth? that was a massive compliment, coming from Katie Lee. He glances at the sheet she slides to him. A contract exclusive to NSG? For the next six years? This was exactly what he’d wanted from the beginning. He takes the pen and twirls it in his hands with a quiet smirk when she mentions that if they share the same vision and he wants to be part of the journey, he knows what to do. 

That he did. 

He steeples his fingers for a moment. “Appropriate that we’re doing this on my birthday,” he states. reaching for the pen again and signing his name where he needed to. He slid it right back and grinned, standing up. “Thank Miss Lee,” he states. “I will keep going,” he adds. This is it now. He’s officially part of nsg. There was no going back now. His parents would just have to deal with the fact that he was going forward in his goals. 

OOC NOTE: First of all, congratulations on arriving at the final step before debut! I know it’s been a long and crazy journey, and I’m so glad you’ve stuck through it. When you are ready, feel free to post this prompt with Namjoon’s response to it.

Should Namjoon choose to SIGN the NSG contract, he will be employed by KT Entertainment without a need to renew a contract until the duration of this one has concluded. As a reward for making it this far, he will receive THREE WEEKENDS unpaid vacation time to use any time between now and the end of December, so long as it doesn’t clash with any special debut activities (such as music show appearances, meaning he can’t actually use her vacation time until after her music show performances have finished.)

Should he choose to REJECT this contract with KT and NSG, he will leave the company, effective immediately upon rejection. He will be able to keep all of his debut points, but will not be able to take any trainee workshops or earn any more debut points/workshop points until he becomes a trainee again. He will not have any special advantage over newer characters when he auditions for other companies in the future, and should he become a trainee at a new company he will be considered a junior trainee all over again, even though he will still have his debut points and would be eligible for debut right away. He WILL have the right to audition for KT again, but the fact that he gave up a contract renewal, especially a debut one, WILL be taken into account in final casting decisions.

He will have up to one week to make his decision IC, meaning that if he does not make a decision by September 19th, he will automatically be cut from the company. Exceptions can be made for those on hiatus.

[xyoohyeonrk]

╌、*feeling like failure、

trigger warnings: scolding, verbal fighting, crying .✦｡ﾟ

vibrations of her phone brings yoohyeon out of focus, eyes shifting from the high paced arurf game in front of her and down to the beaming screen that reveals a new text message; it’s all that is needed for yoohyeon to be executed in-game, a minor distraction that quickly lead to a serious misplacement on her behalf. “oh, fuck...” the curse came out as a mere breath as she picks up the device that ultimately became the cause of her death, only to read through all the incoming messages and realise that they all need a proper answer and thus, her full attention -- that of which, she cannot give right now. too much is at stake and for once, yoohyeon found a team that can actually work together. she leaves her mum on read, using the remaining few last seconds to complete her in-game purchases.

✉ 📲 ▸ TEXT RECEIVED FROM  ━━━━   엄마 ━ ( 3 )

▸ our yoohyeonie~ how are you, sweetie? ♥ ▸ listen, our refrigerator broke down… can you send ￦40,000? ▸ you know that i wouldn’t ask if we had any other choice.    message read ! ▸ yoohyeon-ah? please answer me.    message read !

another text rolls in soon after but yoohyeon has already lost herself into what might, or might not, be the last team fight of the current game. with her screen unlocked, and messaging app open, she accidentally leave the newest message on read also. it is only a matter of seconds anyway so she figures that it won’t really matter. one kill down, two kills down, three kills down before someone manages to stop yoohyeon from wiping out the entire team, fed as she is she unfortunately has a counterpart in the opposite team’s midlaner-- but it isn’t at all enough, they manage to beat down the nexus so low that there is no returning now. while yoohyeon is dead and currently out of the game, her pulse is high as she watch her team mates destroy what is left of the other team’s nexus and secure their victory.

“YES!!!” she practically yells at the screen in front of her, after fourty minutes of intense battle they are finally done and managed to win the game. for a moment there yoohyeon forgot that she does, in fact, live with someone. somewhat embararssed by her outburst, she is glad that naeun is out for another few hours training at kt ent.

✉ 📲 ▸ TEXT SENT TO  ━━━━   엄마 ━ ( 2 )

▸ i’m sorry, mum~ i was in the middle of something~~~ ▸ but i don’t have any more right now, i already gave you everything that i could… ㅠㅠ

satisfied with the victory, yoohyeon brings her chair backwards to lean back in a more relaxed position. she figures that she most probably will be texting her mum from this point of, and it’s pointless to head back into the arurf queue. instead, she changes the game mode to play one last game for the day, lining up for a more chilled game of teamfight tacticts. what she did not take into consideration however, was that her mum might have wanted to call her instead and that is precisely what happens next. moments after yoohyeon accept the matchup, her phone vibrates once again to now reveal an incoming call. she sighs, she’s too tired to converse like this after a full weekend of dancing and having had a full day of work today, but she picks up the call nonetheless. she knows better than to not.

📞 📲 ▸ CALL ONGOING  ━━━━   엄마 ━ ( 00:09 )

yoohyeon: hey, mum~ i’m sorry that i took so long to respond, i wa--

byeol: yoohyeon-ah, what do you mean ‘you don’t have any money’? you just got paid on the 15th, didn’t you? what about that savings account of yours? i know that you are smart enough to not have emptied that already. right? please, i’m not asking for much.

being cut short is not something that yoohyeon is used to and immediately, she notice that it’s uncharacteristically done so by her mum. completely taken aback she remains mute, and she listen to the manipulation that she has yet to realise takes place. a sense of panic hits her, the request is far from grand but there is absolutely no way that she can oblige--  her savings are gone and she won’t be paid for another month. of course, she has enough to pay for rent and food throughout the month of february, but not a dime more than that. if she gave up any more then she would go hungry and while that is something she often do for her family when they’re in need, that is something she has been doing for the past few months already. for once, she could use the satisfaction of being properly fed herself.

📞 📲 ▸ CALL ONGOING  ━━━━   엄마 ━ ( 00:16 )

yoohyeon: i… i– ah, mum, it’s empty. i’m sorry– i’ll work extra hard this month!

byeol: how is it empty, ah? have you wasted your money? what did you waste it on, huh?

her offer is immediately disregarded and yoohyeon suddenly feels attacked when the tone of speech directed at her, is changed to a more hostile approach. she does realise that working extra hard this coming month won’t help them with the current dilemma, she does realise that they need a new refrigerator as soon as yesterday. how can she help, she wonder. perhaps it was foolish of her to buy those gym clothes, thoughts around the decision weighing her down like the worst call of her life. she couldn’t possibly have foreseen this happen though, that her parents’ refrigerator so happened to break down the very month she wanted to spoil herself-- ever since her birthday in january, yoohyeon has mustered the courage to think about herself for once and this is how she is repaid by fate. with shame.

📞 📲 ▸ CALL ONGOING  ━━━━   엄마 ━ ( 00:29 )

yoohyeon: i– i didn’t waste it! i haven’t bought anything in so long but i asked my friend. hwang yeji, remember her? i asked her to teach me how to dance, i needed gym wear fo…

byeol: you wasted your savings on clothes?! don’t you have enough clothes already, ah? i can’t believe how selfish you are, i didn’t raise you like this! what are we going to do now? how are we going to live without a refrigerator– i’m so disappointed in you, i really counted on you for this, yoohyeon-ah!

yoohyeon stopped caring about the game before she even arrived to the first carousel, there’s absolutely no way around defeat and she already know that as she head into round three with minions. having mindlessly sold her first champion for gold and bought everything on roll, she has somehow manged to put together a team of three lights regardless of being scolded by a unreasonably angry mother. during the first half of a teamfight tacticts game she isn’t required to think very much and that alone is the sole reason she can keep from forgeiting already. she cannot for the bare life of her understand where the anger comes from, her heart beating fast as though her life is at stake due to another rush of panic. all yoohyeon wanted by buying the clothes was to pat herself on the shoulder, she deserved it.

📞 📲 ▸ CALL ONGOING  ━━━━   엄마 ━ ( 01:15 )

yoohyeon: i didn’t– ah, i’m sorry… but… what about yookwon oppa? can he contribute?

byeol: how dare you suggest such a thing? you know that your brother is busy. yookwon doesn’t need the added stress right now. 

as if yoohyeon needs the added stress right now, but she doesn’t mention that. it would be as useless to voice aloud as it would be to bring up the winter singer contest that she so bravely signed up for, and not to mention the second chance to audition with sphere entertainment. it would only anger her mum even more if she so much as brought highlight to that, and the fact that she turned down the offer for the sake of her family. all of this being a reason why she did decide that she could use a little something, a little prize for stepping out of her comfort zone-- performing for a live crowd, alone, is scary enough as it is, and then to turn down a company that possibly regretted letting her go in the first place... yoohyeon thought she earned the right to pamper herself. after all, she turned down her dream, for them.

📞 📲 ▸ CALL ONGOING  ━━━━   엄마 ━ ( 01:22 )

yoohyeon: ah, yeah... you’re right... i’m sorry, mum... what can i do?

byeol: nothing, apparently, other than playing your idiotic games and having fun like you have no worries in the world-- don’t think that i can’t hear that mouse of yours clicking like your goddamn life depends on it. you should be ashamed of yourself, behaving like a brat without a single care for her family when they are in need!

immediately she lets go of the mouse, her heart skipping a of beat with such a brute force that she is pained by it. shock turns into confusion, confusion turns into ruin. she wants to cry.

allgedly, yoohyeon doesn’t care for her family. working two part time jobs and sending money home every month obviously doesn’t count for helping out, and neither does going hungry for days on end just to make sure that her parents and yoorim is fed properly. applying for jobs at any given time isn’t good enough either, despite recendly landing herself a new full time job at the escape room in gangnam with a steady income. she is speechless by the accusations and that of an order to be ashamed of herself-- for what, exactly...? for spending money on herself for once? for a moment she is willing to accept that her mum is right but no, she isn’t. concern, anxiety and devastation is rapidly replaced with her own anger. after everything that yoohyeon has done for her family, she does not deserve this treatment.

📞 📲 ▸ CALL ONGOING  ━━━━   엄마 ━ ( 01:41 )

yoohyeon: as if i haven’t done enough for you already! working my ass off, every day, to keep you guys from troubles whenver things get rough, even if it means that i have to go hungry. have you ever thought about that, huh? have you?! and this one time, mum... just this one time, i wanted to pamper myself because i deserved it. you don’t even know what i’ve been through lately. you don’t even know... 

byeol: yooheon-ah, calm down! what are you sa--

it feels like such a waste at this point and yoohyeon gasps for air, trying her very best to keep from hiccuping through whines that manages to escape. she can’t recall the last time that she cried and while some tears can be good and healthy, this one admittedly pains her more than anything else ever has. the mixture of pure agony and betrayal breaks her right there, on the phone with the person that she usually woud seek comfort when upset. once again, she’s so incredibly glad that naeun is out training, but for a different reason; she sobs loudly, her hand reaching up to cover a tear stained cheek as though hiding from the world-- not that it helps in any way or form, the damage has already been done. her game is long forgotten, and for all she cares she has already been taken enough damage to be out.

📞 📲 ▸ CALL ONGOING  ━━━━   엄마 ━ ( 01:58 )

yoohyeon: i can’t help you this time, mum. get the money from somewhere else!

📞 📲 ▸ CALL DISCONNECTED  ━━━━   엄마 ━ ( 02:07 )

she doesn’t allow for a proper response, this time being the one to cut her mum short instead. sweat breaks through the fabric of her t-shirt as she finally end the call without so much as a good bye, immediately burrying her face in both hands as she weeps into the damp palms. it doesn’t feel good to cry this time, it isn’t at all a good cry. yoohyeon feels completely at loss, whatever is she going to do now? with this being the first fight that she has ever had with her mum, she suddenly realise that she don’t know how things will be after this. it doesn’t matter that her mum is trying to call her back now-- not once, not twice, not thrice. yoohyeon can’t hear it through her whimpers, not that she would have picked up anyway. it doesn’t matter that she texts her to apologise. the damage has certainly been done.

[antman-56]

The Long Night Pt. 22

BEEP BEEP BEEP

That sound was starting to get annoying but the only good thing about it was it telling the whole world that Taiyang was still alive. Raven was seating next to him, reading aloud and drinking tea.

Raven (chuckling) : I’m pretty sure this part would have made you laugh. It’s about a bard that can’t keep it in his pants and Geralt saves him by telling the lord that the bard was kicked in the balls by an ox.

Tai remained motionless. He had been for almost a month. Their were times he made a sound of discomfort or joy and one time he opened his eyes, blinked and then passed out again. 

Nurse : Um Miss Branwen, visiting hours end in 10 minutes. But if you like we can let you stay for half an hour more.

Raven : The 10 is fine, thank you.

Raven went back to reading. As the nurse left she heard her say that the kid was lucky to have such a caring girlfriend. 

If only they knew the truth.

Raven got up from her seat and gave Tai a kiss on his forehead.

Raven (whispering) : Wake up soon. I love you.

Raven left the medical wing and was now on her way to the dorm. She was thinking about the homework she still had to do and determining if it was worth it.

She was outside the medical wings doors when she texted Summer :

*Raven :Hey heading home

*Summer : K and could u go to the store and pick up milk

*Summer : ill pay u back

*Raven :Fine 

After a couple of minutes of walking she noticed she was being followed by a group of men, maybe 4 or 5. They were good if it took her this long, she blamed the teachers for the homework. She had no weapons on her and they were behind the cafeteria far away from the residential dorms were located. She began to walk faster and staying in the light. She was beginning to panic, if they were TRBO, JACB, BLAD, or all of them then she was screwed. 

She started looking around to find a pole, a rock, anything to use as a weapon. Then she saw the convenience store was just up ahead and ran for it.

When she was at the door she turned around out of breath and ready to scream. She didn’t see any of them. She went inside the store and took out her scroll.

*Raven : Hey can u send qrow over with Omen

*Summer : Y

*Raven : Some guys r following me and right now in store

*Summer : Stay put well be their fast

Raven stayed in the store and began browsing and occasionally turning towards the window to see if they were still their. And was scared when she saw a silhouette of a man. 

***Next Day***

Raven and Summer were walking towards their class while Qrow stayed in. His class wasn’t for another 2 hours.

Summer : Do you have any idea who it could have been?

Raven : Maybe TRBO, JACB, BLAD or a mix of them? I don’t know! I just ran.

Raven hated to admit it but she felt weak right then and there. If she had Omen with her she would have ran at them without hesitation or remorse. 

Summer saw the look on Raven’s face. Frustrated, angry, ashamed, and worse of all afraid.

Summer (stops and puts her hands on Raven’s shoulders) : Hey, anyone in your situation would have ran. Their is no reason to feel ashamed about it.

Raven : Summer, I was weak.

Summer : Were all weak. When we are around the people we care about, we are at our most strongest. That’s why were Huntresses.

Raven stayed silent. The last time she was with Tai he was holding his head and screaming. They were weak, SHE was weak even around the man she loved. And for the other reason, well Summer would change her mind if she knew.

Raven (taking hands off her shoulders) : Anyway, changing subject. Anything new with Qrow?

Summer : Well I asked him to smell my new conditioner and for his opinion.

Raven : Aside from that being a wired way to flirt, were you in a towel and fresh out the shower or clothed and dry when you went to him?

Summer (slight blush) : Clothed.

Raven : Well did you get close close or close?

Summer (blushing and quickly) : I got close enough to hear his heartbeat explode.

As the girls kept chatting about Operation : Dumbass they were being observed from the rooftops.

Freya (sitting at the edge) : Why are we doing this again?

An Mai (holding binoculars) : James told us to follow her. He believes their is a mole in our group.

Freya :  Hey I’ve kept my mouth shut. I owe Willow everything I have. And Summer is probably the nicest person we have ever met from Beacon. 

An Mai : I agree, but if we do have a mole we have to take every precaution otherwise Tesla wins.

Freya : She let me braid her hair. That’s a sacred trust. And are you sure no one can see us?

An Mai semblance is blend. She can camouflage herself and her immediate area if she is calm. 

An Mai : Yes, i’m sure. I mean I was able to get past Casey Lee Williams backstage security.

Freya : Best! Day! Ever! But what dose Jimmy think she’ll do?

An Mai : Don’t know, that’s why we need to watch her and her team.

Freya (pouting) : Doesn’t mean we have to like it.

An Mai : Agreed.

***BLAD Dorm***

Clothes were being thrown out of a closet and a tail was popping out of it. 

Alvin : No, not this one. No, that needs to be washed. No for obvious reasons. Guys, I need help!

Damien (laughing at the antics) : Glad your admitting it.

Alvin got out of the closet and glared at Damien.

Ben (annoyed) : Get your tail out of my face!

Lenny : Guys how does this make me look? Flashy and bold or dashing and daring?

Ben : Don’t care. 

Alvin : Guys!!

Everyone turned to him.

Alvin (exhausted) : I want to ask out that girl.

Lenny : I would go with her friend. 

Lenny put his hands hovering over his chest. Trying to imitate Raven’s breasts.

Damien : She’s taken by the blonde guy.

Alvin : Plus she’s mean. The small girl,  She’s nice.

Ben : She trapped you in a mine and blew it up!

Alvin :Still her voice!! It was angelic~

Lenny :He is right. Beauties come in all sizes, big or small. I’ll help you. 

Lenny rushed over to him and took out his measuring tape.

Lenny (Edna Mode impersonation)  : First off darling you lack the pazazz in your look. Your plain and boring and the tail, was so last year.

He playfully pulled it and Alvin went stiff.

Alvin : Hands off the tail!

Lenny : My bad! But in all seriousness you need -

Damien : Muscle! (pushes Lenny aside and makes a pose) That’s what all chicks want. Come with me to the gym and get on my program and I promise you after 3 weeks every girl will want you.

Ben : What he needs is confidence. Be funny and stuff around her. Chicks love the romantic crap movies show. 

Lenny : What no he needs to be unique not some muscle brain jackass or some beta male nonsense.

Damien : Muscled jackass!?

Ben : At least the girls I come home with don’t regret it the morning after!

Lenny : You want to fucking GO!!

Alvin : Can I p-

BL_D : NO!!!

Alvin walked to the window and watched the campus ignoring the fight right behind him and daydreaming about a possible future with a beautiful girl with silver eyes.

Imagining a nice house on a hill, a litter of children with silver eyes and with different faunus features from fluffy tails and ears to looking almost normal. Them going to a local community center to sing as a family, taking on huntsmen missions as a couple and maybe family. He just stared at the window with a smile.

Damien was holding Lenny up in the air and was about to choke slam him. He had Ben in one arm wrapped around his neck to hold him in place. 

RING RING RING

Alvin snapped out of his dream and turned to the source.

Ben : Let me go.

Damien dropped Lenny on the floor and let go of Ben.

Ben walked to the scroll and picked it up.

Ben : Miller speaking, Turbo whats the problem? 

Lenny and Damien were looking at Ben and hearing him say “Okay” or “I got it”. He hung up the phone and used his semblance.

Ben (interanlly) : We got a two problems.

The rest of team BLAD ran to get notes books and pencils. 

((/// * is writing and   I   for Ben is using his semblance))

*Lenny : What?

Ben (  I  ) : We lost our only sponsor.

That spooked the team.

Damien (yelled)  : WHAT!!

Ben : Quiet!

*Lenny : HOW?

*Damien : Butch was our one and only sponsor. What do you mean he’s gone.

Ben (  I  ) : Something happened and now he lost control of his territory.

*Alvin : Alright, whats the other problem?

Ben (exhaled,   I   ) : The KTs are gone. All of them were found dead in an alley and the survivors were just found near the border. 

Ben looked away from the group, especially Lenny, not able to meet their gaze. 

Lenny (  I  ) : How?!

Ben (  I  ) : Crucified and burned. It had the True Sons of Icarus name all over it. 

*Alvin : So, the gangs dead.

*Lenny : No! WE are alive and we’ll get our revenge!

He said the last part with a sinister tone. 

*Damien : Well lets go pay the Sons a visit.

Ben (  I  ) : Not yet. They have about 60 guys maybe more.

*Lenny : Then what?!

Ben (  I  ) : They’ re at war with The West Triads, The Wolf Pack, Samedi’s Prophets and The Lost Kingz. Their all fighting over Butch’s territory and JACB is gonna help us take them out if we help secure Butch’s territory after he kicks the bucket.

*Damien : So, we kill whoever wins and if the Sons, win its two birds with one stone. 

Ben (  I  ) : And Tesla said he would be our sponsor if we do this.

*Damien : How?

Ben (  I  ) : Well two teams are graduating and one spot is open for us.

*Alvin : I don’t know about this, what happens if a White Fang show up again? 

*Lenny : They won’t. Police Chief Mann made it almost impossible for them to protest legally and if they do. Cops are allowed to use force.

Ben : So, its decided. Get some rest and Alvin go up to her and ask her out. Maybe she likes you too.

Alvin nodded and went outside to test his luck. Tonight was the night.