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rowanaelinn · 2 years

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Wires - Six

Masterlist

A/N: Hey! I hope you will love this! Btw, no Illicit Affairs tomorrow I will post on Sunday as I have been sick all week! Enjoy!

Warnings: Talks of drugs, language | Word Count: 2,700

“We’re home,” Gavriel said, parking in front of the Galathynius’ mansion. She almost rolled her eyes; she should have known he would drive her there when he said he would drive her home.

She and Gavriel flew home for the week of break, while Lysandra and Aedion enjoyed their time in vacation. Fenrys had invited her to stay in Monaco with him for a few days, to catch up as he said, but all the emotions written all over her uncle’s house were the reason why she wasn’t partying with her friends.

She barely looked at the house, the knowledge of what and who was inside was damning enough. “My leg hurts.”

“Wait an hour.”

She threw him an annoyed gaze, “My leg hurts. I want a pill.”

“Wait an hour,” he repeated, tone dry. “It’s every six hours.”

“Those indications are bullshit.”

“And that reasoning, young lady,” he said, “Is why you’re here for a week.”

She chuckled, “What, the Galathynius’ mansion turned into a rehab center between yesterday and today?” He had threatened her a couple of times to send her to rehab already. Ever since goddamn Rowan Whitethorn snitched on her after leaving her high and dry.

She’d been weak, allowing herself one second the reminder of the taste of his lips on hers, to remind herself how it felt when Rowan Whitethorn got his hands on her and made her feel as if the world had stopped.

Even years after, it felt better than any high the drugs gave her. But the fact was that it destroyed her more than the pills or other shits.

A mistake. It had been a mistake, and one she didn’t care to repeat.

“You are lucky, Aelin,” Gavriel sighed. “I don’t think you realize that.”

She snorted, feeling like a child. “I’m lucky you and Aedion and his team cannot risk a scandal during a season.”

He glared at her, “Neither me nor Aedion care about scandal or reputation. We care for you, and we know you. Would you like to be shipped off to some rehab? If so, tell me and you’ll be there tonight.”

She glared at him, temper rising, “I want you to leave me the fuck alone and let me do my own choices.”

He sighed, and she knew it took a lot from him to not let his anger rise. She could count on one hand the times she saw her uncle angry, and bless her it had never been at her. “Doing coke is not a choice, it’s a mistake. One that your cousin and I are desperately trying to prevent from happening again.”

She looked away, jaw clenching. She would kill Whitethorn. She swore it, she would kill him. “So, what, you want to fix me?”

“I want my niece to be okay.”

Her bottom lip quivered as she looked back at him, “Then don’t make me see him, please.”

They both knew who she was talking about. Her father. She couldn’t see him, lying in this bed. This was just a body, not her father. Her father was the man who would wake her up in the middle of the night to take her skiing, he was the man who would take her on his knees and let her think she was driving his car.

He was the man with a fierce passion for adrenaline and whose eyes were so filled with love he could make everything better. The man in the bed was only a shell. Her father was gone, and it was all the Whitethorn’s fault.

She hated them, wanted them to rot on hell and suffer. Instead, Whitethorn’s son was winning glory every weekend and once more, tried to ruin her life. She would claw him face out the next time he got near her.

He sighed, “We’re here because there’s someone I would like you to meet inside, she is talking with your mother. You don’t have to visit him if you don’t have to, but you’re staying with me this week. Not alone.”

She hated that, but she also knew him enough to know she didn’t have any room to negotiate, and she should feel grateful that his overbearing son had decided to travel instead of coming along. “Fine,” she gave in. “Let get this over with.”

The moment she entered her former house, it was like her mother heard an alarm. She almost ran out of the living room and threw her arms around Aelin’s neck, hugging her so tight she was almost choking. “Cariño, te he echado de menos,” she said, and Aelin thought her mother was close to tears. Honey, I missed you.

“Yo también te he echado de menos, mamá.” I’ve missed you too, Mom.

She pulled back from the embrace, keeping hands on her shoulders as she looked her up and down. The worry that escaped her was almost intoxicating. Then, still in Spanish she blurted, “You’re so thin, Gavriel are you even feeding her? Oh, no, darling. I’ll cook you your—”

“Evalin,” Gavriel stopped her in a second, always with a kind smile on his face.

She also broke into a smile, “I’m so sorry, you had a long flight.” Then, she turned her nervous gaze on Aelin. “I know you are probably tired, baby, but there is someone here to meet you and speak about… a few things. If you’re not up to it, I can ask her to come back tomorrow.”

“See, that’s what we call giving a choice. You should try it someday,” she told Gavriel, which made him roll his eyes. “She’ll meet her now, thank you Evalin.”

Aelin whispered something that wasn’t nice under her breath, and fortunately Gavriel’s ears didn’t catch it. Or maybe he just pretended not to hear, she wasn’t sure. “Who the hell do you even want me to meet?”

He shrugged; a hand high on her back to guide her into the living room. Then, when she walked in, Aelin saw a brunette standing. She wasn’t tall, hell Aelin could even call her tiny. She smiled and held her hand to Aelin, then introduced herself in English. “Hello, my name is Elide. I know how confusing things can be, but I promise it will all work out. I’m here to guide you to sobriety, and to help you in your everyday life.”

Aelin looked down at the hand Elide was holding her, making no move to shake it. Instead, she turned to her uncle. There was a stranger in her house, and she didn’t wish to make a scene but… still. “A nanny?”

He glared at her, she really made it hard for him to keep his temper in check. “Don’t be rude, Aelin.”

When she looked back at Elide, she didn’t seem offended at all. Aelin cocked her head to the side and crossed her arms, “Define sobriety.”

“The absence of any drugs in your system.”

“Define any, because you’re all talking as if me taking drugs is a regular thing. It happened once, I’m far from an addict.”

“Could you go a day without the pills for pain?”

Aelin was full on glaring now, and she wasn’t ashamed. “I couldn’t, Elide. Weren’t they prescribed in case I’m in pain? So no, since pain is a daily thing, so are the pills.”

“If they are taken for medicinal purposes, there shouldn’t be any problem then.”

Exactly where she was going. “Exactly, so you can go back to whatever you were doing before today without any problem then.”

“Well, no.” Elide smiled, though Aelin felt as if it was all fake. “Since you have nothing to hide, Aelin, you won’t mind me following you around for a few weeks? You know, to give your family some peace of mind.”

Aelin turned to her mother, her eyes turned pleading. In Spanish she said, “Mommy, didn’t dad always tell us that strangers shouldn’t come in our life? Look how it ended the last time we let other people close. Mommy—”

“Aelin,” Elide stopped her. “If you are trying to prove you are not an addict, it is your moment. But trying to manipulate your mother is not a good start.”

“Manipulate?” Aelin hissed, feeling cornered. “Don’t you—”

“Aelin,” Gavriel stopped her with a hand on her. “We understand it would be a hard adjustment, but this is the better option for everyone.”

“For you, you mean. I don’t think invading my privacy is what I’d call the best option.”

“I’m sure rehab will be better suited for your tastes, then?”

“Listen, Aelin,” Elide stopped her. “I understand that privacy is a big thing, and I won’t be with you all the time. I only wish for your good health, mentally and physically.”

“Then leave.”

She shrugged, “My uncle is in the business too, so if you rather have him with you most of the day…”

“Please, my girl,” her mother breathed, grabbing her hand. “For papa, we want you to be healthy.”

“I am not an addict mommy, please believe me,” she pleaded.

“I’m only asking to believe you, but it is a lot of incidents in a short amount of time.”

She sighed, apparently, she wouldn’t get shit from her mother. She’d have to get rid of this problem by herself. She would find a solution, if only because she knew she couldn’t allow it to be the end. She could face everything now, and no one in this room understood. She sighed, giving in because she knew she had no choices, “You’re not watching me pee.”

“I’ll turn around,” Elide said.

She rolled her eyes, “I need a nap.”

“Would you let Elide explain the details of the arrangement first?”

It wasn’t as if Aelin had a choice, and the most detail she knew, the better her plans to get rid of this arrangement would be. She sat on the couch, but hatred had her type a too-familiar number on her phone and type I hate you. It was petty, that much she was willing to admit. But hey, it did the trick.

Aelin was to spend most of her days with Elide, but she was allowed to spend her nights alone. Parties were fine, as long as it wasn’t on a daily basis and that Aelin stayed reasonable with alcohol. She hadn’t asked what reasonable meant, but Aelin was sure she had a very different definition of the word than Elide did.

Every three days, Aelin was to take urinal tests to test her for drugs. And the worst of them all, Elide would keep her pills to regulate how much she took. She almost stood and screamed at that, but instead Aelin took it all as her uncle laid a hand on her shoulder, apparently anticipating a reaction from her.

She looked down at her phone as Elide kept talking, but her speech about being sober was less entertaining than the three texts waiting on her phone, all coming from the number she had texted a few minutes ago.

< First text in six years and this is what I get?

< What have I done to deserve this gift?

Then, a few minutes after, < Aelin?

How could he be so infatuating even in texts? She was ready to spend a good time thinking of how she hated him, but then her phone started ringing. She recognized the number too easily, and her heart missed a bit. She could spend him to voicemail, she should. But she had taken too much in herself today, and if there was one thing about Rowan whitethorn it was how easy it was to pick a fight with you.

“Yeah, very interesting,” Aelin said, standing and giving Elide the same fake-smile she had been given earlier. “I have to take thing, but very good oral speaking skills.”

---

Aelin closed the door of her door, and didn’t spent too much time wondering about her teenage memories in this room before she picked up the phone. “You had to pick up on the last ring.”

She rolled her eyes, his voice annoying her. She already regretted picking up the fight that was to come. “You should be grateful I found time to answer.”

“After you sent the first text?”

“Why did you call? You could have just ignored me. Hell, how did you even know it was me?”

“Because you haven’t changed your number in the last fifteen years. But, Aelin,” she hated the way her named rolled off his tongue, how it made her stand straighter. “How did you know my number?”

She couldn’t really say she still knew it, if only because her teenage self had typed it so much it felt like muscle memory. “Doesn’t matter. Just wanted to pass a message.”

“That I should go fuck myself?”

“That,” she said, ignoring any other thought that might cross her cursed mind. “And mind your own business, alright?”

“What are you talking about?” He asked, and she could feel the tension through the line.

Was he seriously asking such a thing? “The next time you feel like playing hero and want to look like a good guy, don’t include me and what I do in private in those plans.”

She wasn’t too keen in mentioning what had taken place in the bathroom after he found her. Really not. She hoped he wasn’t either; it would be great.

“Ah,” he sighed. “I see.”

For a second she was silent, and so was he. But she could hear him breathe, and she desperately tried to look for any signs that would help her understand what was going on in his mind. She didn’t know why, probably only curiosity.

“You’ve ruined my life enough,” she said. “Just… Leave me be.”

He snorted, “You’re the one to say that?”

Her back stiffened, “What is that supported to mean?”

“F1 is my thing, but you had to come and ruin it. You had to impose me your goddamn presence when you never cared for this world before. What was it? Were you bored? Leave, because you’re ruining it all.”

“If I could not have to see you every week I would,” she hissed. “But don’t blame your losses on me.” Indeed, it wasn’t a good start of the season for him. And the fact that her cousin’s season was starting much better was only icing on the cake. “Maybe it’s time for retirement.”

“Stop talking as if you had no other choice,” he hissed back.

“Maybe I don’t!”

A moment of silence, and of regret on her part. Then… “What does that mean?”

“Nothing,” she rushed to say. “Listen, I don’t want to see you as much as you don’t want to see me. Ignore me and I’ll do the same, mind your own business and I’ll do the same.”

“It’s not enough,” she could almost see him shake his head. “You won’t be far enough for my sanity.”

Was his misplace hate for her that strong? Gods, his audacity… “I’m being nice, Rowan, because all I want to do is ruin your life.”

“You already did.”

The man lying in a bad in her very house seemed to say the opposite. “You’re a liar.”

“I’ll avoid you as much as possible,” he said. “And if you want to destroy your life and become one of those clichés rich girl addict to coke or whatever drug they find themselves in position of, do it. I don’t give a shit anymore.”

Full of sarcasm she said, “Thank you for your blessing, I was only waiting for it.”

He sighed, his temper rising. “Why do you always have to be so—”

He stopped himself then, and Aelin told herself she should hang up. She really should, but she made no move to do it. She told herself that once she hung up, she would be alone and she wasn’t sure to trust herself, but it didn’t sound like then entire truth.

Quietly, he started, “Aelin, are you…” Then a long pause. “Never mind. I’ll stay away, do the same.”

And then he hung up.

••••••

@sheharahu // @morganofthewildfire // @thestoriesyoutell // @fromthelibraryofemilyj // @swankii-art-teacher // @itsforeverinnocent-blog // @becarefuloflove // @imnotsogoodatthis // @rowaelinismyotp // @a-court-of-milkandhoney // @feysand-loml // @elentiyawhitethorn // @live-the-fangirl-life // @story-scribbler // @loves-books // @fangirlprincess09 // @theysayitscrazy // @danibutterr // @endlessdaydream // @thegreyj // @gracie-rosee // @acreativelydifferentlove // @cretaceous-therapod // @louphantomdragon // @mis-lil-red // @backtobl4ck // @whoever-you-choose-to-love // @lemonade-coolattas // @mad-madeline-ace // @the-introverted-bibliophile // @leiawritesstories // @emilyoftheshadows // @anniesbookshelf // @rainbowcheetah512 // @astra-ad-mare // @story-scribbler // @superspiritfestival // @wordsafterhours // @rowaelinrambling // @black-daisy-water // @fireheart-violet // @livsdriverslicense // @charlizeed // @ladykreads // @mariamuses // @autumnbabylon // @justreadertings // @highqueenofelfhame

#rowaelin #rowan whitethorn #rowaelin fanfiction #rowan x aelin #throne of glass fanfiction #wires

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theblondegoesabroad · 1 year

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Day 96 - Three years in Belgium - a recap

Friday 4th November 2022

Words cannot begin to express how grateful I am for these last three years in Belgium. Not only did Belgium become a place to stay but a home. A place where there have been many ups and downs, tears and laughter, relaxing days and full on sport, pandemics and rule breaking, beer and boulets and everything in between. Everything that makes a place change from just an area on a map to a place full of connections, emotions, memories, a home.

I came to Belgium unsure, I was just out of uni and finally making money, enough to even start thinking about the kiwi dream of buying a house, and who was I to give it all up and move to the other side of the world with only the invitation to stay with Benoit and his family as a motivation. Was Belgium really that good? Did I really want to try find a job where I would have to perfect my French? Was Benoit – my Belgian model – really all that he cracked up to be? Would his family like me? And worse, would his sister like me?? Understandably there were doubts, pros and cons lists, questions, but in the end, late in May 2019 I jumped on a plane and headed off on my adventure. And honestly, I can tell you that Belgium was nothing like I imagined it to be. It was better.

It started pretty nicely, I arrived, Benoit picked me up in a very fancy car, (turns out it was Joelles), we had a quick hello with his family, then I napped for the afternoon, and woke up to a dinner party where I met Pablos flatmates and one of Benoits cousins, from the start, although jetlagged and overwhelmed, it was a good beginning, these were good people, and I began to feel my doubts fade away and just maybe, this was the right decision for me. Fast forward three years, and here we are having the same types of dinners with the same people, everyone coming to see us, but not because they are curious about Benoît’s Kiwi girlfriend, but because we are now leaving and those initial hellos developed into deep friendships, oh how time flies. These last few weeks have been full of dates, midday and evening, and climbing in between, I have never had a social calendar so full, and although I was sick, and was probably only awake due to the many cups of coffee per day consumption, I feel blessed. Blessed to have people to visit, share a final meal with those close to us, and to relish in the beauty of their friendships. Every invitation has touched me deeply, from dinners with Benoits family friends to the last shepards pie at the flat. How lucky we are.

We have had an eventful few years, and ones that I will never forget. Summer of 2019 was a busy one, Joelle and Paul were travelling quite a bit, which gave Benoit and I the chance to get comfortable together in Sprimont and for me to feel comfortable in my new home. We then had the major initiation into sport with my first camping holiday with the Tyber-Henry group. I suffered and missed the GnTs at the lake relaxing in the sun. But everyone was friendly and seemed to give me credit for my knack for learning peoples names. At least I had that going for me, as the sport wasn’t as easily learnt! Then we had a whirlwind trip around Europe with Jamie where we travelled all over Europe in a fastpaced adventure. For the coming years, I was so grateful that I was able to share a European experience with my little brother before covid hit, and although I regret that Mum and Dad never got the chance to visit us in Belgium, so I could share my life with them, at least Jamie got to experience it with us, heat wave and all.

Then covid, the confinements, the rules that nobody could keep up with because they changed pretty much every week, the constant working from home environment, the frustration with the regulations and incertitude for when it would all end. I considered briefly heading back to NZ at the start of covid, it seemed like all the kiwis abroad were heading back home, but I made the choice, albeit a tough one, to stay in Belgium with Ben and his family. Turns out it was another good decision as despite my job, I love my life in Belgium. The confinement’s just brought the family closer, and I love how close we have all become thanks to the many days and evenings spent in each other’s company.

Summer of 2020 and 2021 – although there was full covid regulations in place we managed to fake ourselves a few covid passes and we all headed back to our usual camping spot for summer. Luckily for the two years of covid in Europe they decided to ease back on the regulations each summer which mean we could go back to where it all kind of started for me, the integration into the family and the sports that I now love, a true area for comparison. Each year, our love for climbing grew and my connections with the family strengthened.  Apart from the camping holidays, the big family reunions, secret covid parties/Christmases, and clandestine climbing gyms, we had so many lovely memories just at home, learning about each other, discussing life, repeating discussions that we had already had many times (much to Benoits pleasure), encouraging Jo to let Nazgul into the house for his final months, learning to crochet and sew, eating mince in every preparation possible, going for runs with Jo and Sophie, laughing about fake handicaps at Esneux, having an open beer fridge to all climbers that felt like passing by, heated crypto discussions, our famous Friday night pizza nights, being treated to breakfast in bed in Autumn with a fracassé au pomme, making soap, the occasional waffle on a Saturday morning that Paul would bring back from the markets. All those little things, and so many of those little details that make leaving so much harder.

What started out as a questionable idea, turned out to be the greatest decision of my life, not only have we experienced so many wonderful memories, I have formed relationships that run so deeply my heart is heavy with the thought of having to have said goodbye. I have often said that I was grateful to be living with Joelle and Paul (for many reasons) but mainly for the fact that now we know each other so well, we can talk and laugh about anything and everything, and now I look forward to seeing them again as much as Benoit does. It was an absolute pleasure to be able to spend these last three years together, to become part of the family. To find a sister and best friend in Marie, a confident for everything, and someone who I will miss having in my life day to day. To find someone to relax, climb and laugh with in Paul, who is always keen to light a fire in winter and crack open a beer in summer (or any season for that matter). To find my running buddy, fellow sewing student, and salad maker in JojoRabbit, who has taught me many things about myself and life during these last years. And to find Pablo, probably the opposite to me in personalities, but someone who I admire for his enthusiasm, self-assurance, guru advice and kite surfing lessons. And recently to Clem, a fine addition to the Henry clan. And to everyone else, the list is too long to site here, but everyone we have met from our climbing friends, Benoits childhood or scouting friends, our village and the extended familes. Each person has helped make these last few years better, each connection, each smile, each moment spent together, are memories that I will cherish. I don’t think I have the proper words to sum up such a period of my life, three years jam packed with experiences is too hard to describe with just a few paragraphs, but I am thankful for everything that I have been lucky enough to be a part of and I can only hope that this phase of our lives is not finished with a full stop, but a comma, in the hopes that there will be more to come. So for perhaps the final time... Love Kate xxxx ,

But wait there is more, although theblondegoesabroad will be finishing, Benoit and I have now even more “fans” in Belgium, so we will be starting a new blog together in NZ to keep everyone updated with weekly updates on our life – see you there - Kenovele.tumblr.com

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regiscervs · 8 months

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Seattle - and dusting off my traveler spirit.

My adventure to wander to where I've been lucky get invited to led me to the beautifully eclectic city of Seattle – a place where innovation meets range tradition, where nature entwines with urban life, and where the heartbeat of everyday existence resonates in the lives of its people. My goal here was to get a real sense of life in the city, to live alongside the locals, to breathe the same air, and to become a silent observer of their lives, all while surrounding myself with the natural beauty of the Pacific North West.

Seattle is a city that echoes the sentiment that no two lives are the same. People from all walks of life call this place home, each weaving a story that's uniquely their own. This I found to be medicine, as comparison has been the monster inside my closet for the last few months. Diversity is what makes our world so beautifully complex. Comparison is deeply human, it serves purpose, yet in todays connected world it becomes a trap keeping us from the freedom needed to fully step into the life we've been given, and do the best we can - aware of our blessings.

Seattle's sense of community might be my biggest takeaway and what will keep coming back. I could see the “American Dream” alive, although maybe not “well” enough. I enjoyed observing and talking-to neighbors who tend with love and dignity to their small pieces of land- flower gardens, DIY patios and tiny farms where my daily eye candy while walking my friend Mr. Darcy. I got to talk to Mary, a sweet neighbor living in the oldest house in the neighborhood. Mary seemed to be the heartbeat of the community, a trusted neighbor who is involved in local politics and believes in the strength of her neighborhood to be resilient in this changing times.

Time spent alone during this journey has been a gift I thank myself for – a chance to reflect, to process, and to nurture a fresh perspective. Stepping away from the familiar allowed for thoughts to roam freely, for ideas to bloom, and for getting to reconnect with God .

So, journey continues, and i'm most happy to report a sense of inner wellbeing- a blend of being present yet detached, of connecting while continuing where the journey calls. In this city where technology and industry thrive and the natural world perseveres, I'm learning the dance of life's many facets. And as I traverse through these unique stories and lives, I'm reminded that my purpose lies not in replicating others' paths, but in weaving my own- which seems to be in great part about mindfully exploring the diversity of others. Onward I go, embracing the diverse tapestry of existence with an open heart and a recently dusted traveler's spirit.

#travelblogger #travel blog #seattle

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elifalvey · 1 year

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LOCATION — Zahava & Lorelai’s home.

WHO — Zahava ( @zahavaxkamara ).

Elijah exhaled a sigh as navigated Zahava and Lorelai’s neighborhood. It’s been several weeks since he mucked up everything with Lorelai, plummeting the state of their friendship to the lowest point it’s ever been just in time for the new year, and he was well aware of that. He was well aware of the fact that he should have probably groveled and apologized much, much sooner by now — but he simply couldn’t bring himself to face her, and the thought of potentially making things worse by being less composed than he wanted to be only made him feel more anxious about the situation. Nonetheless, he knew that she deserved one; he loved Lorelai’s friendship and was truly apologetic for how he’d been treating her lately, so he came with the intention to power through the hurdles his mind set up for him and make things right. In a strange parallel to New Years Day, he came in search for Lorelai this time only to find that it was Zahava’s car parked in the driveway instead when he pulled up. Instantaneously, any sense of nervousness that he felt in preparation for the interaction he expected to happen faded away. Maybe this was a blessing in disguise; maybe this was a sign he should talk to Zahava first, like he originally intended before he screwed everything up in the first place.

Getting out of the car and strolling up to their front door, he hesitated as he considered letting himself in. Bad idea. If he learned anything, it was that he was going to knock from now on. And he did just that: he knocked a few times before pressing the doorbell, eagerly rocking on his feet as he waited for his best friend to answer the door. “Fucking hell, it’s about time you came back,” he said in lieu of a proper hello, although a smile was curling his lips and his arms were open to invite Zahava into a hug before he could even think about doing anything else. “I was starting to think you abandoned your husband. Or somehow got lucky enough to find someone to replace me, which is far worse.”

#INTERACTIONS.#ft. zahava #''tell a friend to tell a friend ........ she's baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaack''

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transgirl-gaming-thoughts · 1 year

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My Thoughts On: Animal Crossing New Horizons

Hi there! Alex here, late to the party as usual. I know that New Horizons came out, what, 3 years ago? I bought the game late, and only the other day finally attended my first K.K. Slider concert and officially "finished" the game! I figured it's better late than never, and I should go ahead and write out some of my thoughts on the game.

So first things first, the game's avatar is so customizable and I love it. Never before have I enjoyed making my character more than this game! Between the actual character and all the clothes you can collect, there's so many options, and that's not even counting the custom designs you can make!

The game sets you down on a deserted island where you have to forge a new life along with a few other lucky participants, all funded by one Tom Nook, life-long entrepreneur and loan shark. Step one is to set up camp, but pretty soon you'll be taking out a loan on your first house, and the other residents will volunteer you as the Resident Representative, sort of like a mayor! (that was nice of them...) After that, its up to you to invite new residents to live on the island, pick a place for their home, decorate/care for the island's scenery, and eventually set up shops and other buildings. From that point it progresses a lot like any other Animal Crossing game, opening new shops and making money off of fish, insects, etc to buy new things for your house and new clothes to wear. Something new to New Horizons is the DIY crafting bench where you can use materials to craft your own furniture, tools, etc. Its a pretty streamlined system in my opinion, and it adds to the interactive aspect of living on this island.

As time goes on, Tom Nook reveals to you that he has plans to make the island nice enough to invite famous musician K.K. Slider to perform a concert there! To achieve this, he has you set up new plots of land to invite more residents, and Isabelle, the assistant, gives you advice on improving the islands scenery until you have at least a 3 Star Rating, and Nook invites K.K. to perform! When K.K. Slider arrives to perform his concert, he sings an adorable Animalese rendition of the title theme as the staff credits roll, and afterwards Nook tells you that K.K. loved the island so much that he wants to perform there every Saturday night! From that point on you can unlock new tools to terraform your island and truly make it the best it can be, along with unlocking places like The Roost cafe where you can scan an amiibo to invite various characters to hang out for coffee, even special characters that don't otherwise appear in New Horizons! Life is yours to live, and you can live it to the fullest!

I've only sunk about 80 hours into this game so far, but I can easily see myself aiming for the hundreds as I continue to shape my island and finish filling the museum exhibits. I also decided I want to try and make a cat-themed island with only cat residents, so I may need to evict a few people if I can find some cats... no matter! I've greatly enjoyed my time on my island, and so have many other people! This game is an easy 5/5 stars for me! Such a fun, cute, cozy game to relax with after a long day!

Thanks for reading, and be sure to ask questions and suggest new post ideas in my ask box! Stay safe, stay hydrated, and God bless! Happy gaming to ya!

~Alex

#assorted gaming thoughts #animal crossing #new horizons #animal crosing new horizons

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finelinevogue · 2 years

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album listening party

i was late are we surprised? no! hopefully this calm you down a little <3

There was no denying that you were one of Harry’s greatest fans.

Of course you weren’t conceited or self-absorbed enough to claim that you were his biggest fan, but you like to think you’re within the top 0.001% of his Spotify listeners.

In fact, you must be because otherwise you would not have been invited to his new ‘Harry’s House’ Spotify listening party. To say you were lucky was an understatement. You must have been born the moment a shooting star passed, because it was hard to believe that something like this was actually happening to you.

The night before the listening party you could barely sleep, stressing that maybe your outfit wasn’t actually that good of a choice or thinking over how your introduction was going to go. Unfortunately Spotify could only bless you with one ticket, in order to gain as many different people as possible, so you were also worried about going alone being the introvert that you are.

The queue was so long for the venue. Standing outside of it didn’t feel real. You messaged your friends, trying to contain your excitement over meeting your inspiration in less than an hour. Everyone in the line were either standing with friends and family who had dropped them off, or were making friends already. If you didn’t have such an irrational fear of making new friends, you would introduce yourself to the group of girls in front of you. For now, though, you’d keep on counting your deep breaths.

It wasn’t before long that the queue started moving, people heading on inside to meet a man that had changed their lives. It just didn’t feel real.

When it was your turn to reach the front, you were greeted by a smiling man. “Hello love! How are you doing today?”

Your heart warmed at the thought of this man having to greet every single fan before you, and after, yet he still had a smile on his face and a spring in his step.

“A little nervous, but mainly excited.” You replied, anxious to get inside now.

“Oh I bet! If you just move to the right for me, one of my colleagues will set you up with your tote bag and some headphones. Alright?”

You nodded politely and moved to where he was pointing, where a woman was waiting for you.

“Hi, I’m Angela. Lovely to meet you.” You said hi back. “This is yours,” she said, handing you a stuffed tote back with the ‘youarehome’ logo on it. “It’s got a signed CD, an album photobook, a sticker and a poster inside of it. Here are the headphones. They are wireless and when the session starts, they will automatically start playing the music. Is that all okay?”

“Sounds amazing.” You made sure you collected yourself before walking off into a room full of other awaiting fans.

There were already small groups forming, talking about which track they claimed and random theories you had seen floating around on Twitter previously. The atmosphere was so chill. The room was full of leather worn sofas, shades of browns and cream painting the room. There were a few plants set up on the window sills and there were coffee tables set up with jam doughnuts and custard creams. It felt like home.

Harry’s House.

You made yourself comfortable on a sofa towards the corner of the room, popping your newly acquired tote bag and personal bag on the seat next to you. You took out your phone, messaging people to say that you were actually here and safe, before taking to Twitter to see how the less lucky fans were feeling about today.

You recognised a couple of the staff from the Pleasing pop-ups, whilst also catching a glimpse of Jeff at one point. It was very hard to admit that any of this was real.

It was ten minutes later, when everyone had taken their seats and filled up on coffees and cakes, that Jeff came into the room first.

Everyone went quiet.

Not three seconds later did Harry then walk into the room.

You could safely say that you could no longer breathe. The air was snatched right from your lungs and placed God knows where else. He was here. He was right there. Standing in front of the room with an adorable orange knitted sweater and black flares, matched with a pair of Gucci trainers you’d seen him wear at the Brits.

He smiled like he knew that he had just lit up the room.

He waved at everyone and let out a soft “Hello.”

Some people cried. Some screamed. Others, like you, sat back and soaked in the moment because you were sure that nothing like this would quite happen again. You were okay with that, because this moment was dosing you with enough happiness to last until your next lifetime.

“How is everyone?”

A chorus of ‘goods’ and ‘thrivings’ came back from the room. You stayed quiet, just admiring the man that you had looked up to all these years. He was finally here and you just wanted a minute or two to accept that he was real.

“Nice jumper.” He said to someone who was wearing the new ‘Shroom Bloom’ blue sweater. You wished you could have gotten it, but your bank balance screamed otherwise. “Oh and great choice of hat.” He said to someone else, who was sporting a Green Bay Packers hat.

“Okay, so we’ll do some introductions and you will have the option to ask Harry some questions. Then we’ll have the listening party, before having a little wrap up at the end. Feel free to constantly snack and drink. Toilets are just through there and, yeah, let’s have a good day!” The same man who greeted you on the door spoke delightfully, before handing over to Jeff.

“Hi, so yeah, I’m Jeff. I got stuck with giving the housekeeping talk.” He joked, making people laugh - including Harry. “I don’t think it will come as a surprise when I say, please don’t take photos or videos today. This is not a chance for a meet and greet, this is simply an opportunity for you to hear Harry’s new music. Obviously, if we do find evidence of misconduct there will be severe consequences and honestly I don’t want to have to deal with the paperwork. But enjoy yourselves today and I’ll hand you over to the man himself.”

People applauded for Jeff and then clapped even louder for Harry. It was such a treasure getting to see him in person, smiling and laughing like he was genuinely born for this moment.

“Hello everyone. So nice to meet you all.” He gives small waves across the room, and you pretend that one of them was just for you. “Today is pretty special for me, as I’m sure it will be for some of you, so really all I have to say is just enjoy it. Obviously, very excited for your questions afterwards but even more excited to hear what you think of the album. Only, if you think it’s shit just don’t tell me ‘cause I don’t think my ego could take it!”

Harry finished up talking, introducing some other people on his team, before being handed a pair of headphones himself. He walked to the opposite side of the room than you, sitting within a group of girls that were giggling over how he chose to sit with them first.

There was a countdown in your ears and the music began.

The first song was punchy and it gave you the punk rock vibes that everyone thought Harry was going for with HS3. The second song was so chill, that you could even listen to it on a summer’s day walking down the beach. The third song was sad, punching you right to the throat so that tears welled in your eyes. The fourth song you had already heard of, ‘As It Was’, but you contently listened along to it again.

Harry moved after the fourth song, going to sit in a different part of the room.

You listened to tracks 5, 6 and 7 before Harry came over to your side of the room. Originally, you thought he was coming to sit with the group of girls in front of you. Instead, he came and sat down on the spare seat next to you. Of course, you didn’t notice at first because your eyes were closed as you nodded along to another sad song. You wanted to make note of every sad lyric, so that when you went home you could dissect them and write up a ‘kill list’ for whoever hurt him.

When track 7 finished, you opened your eyes and scanned the room, only to have your breath caught in your throat when you realised Harry was sat next to you.

“Oh my god!” You laughed, choking on air.

Harry laughed, before turning concerned at your coughing fit. “Are you alright?” He asked, taking off his headphones so he could hear you better. He patted your back gently, watching you start to regain your breath again. “Can we get some water please?” He asked someone from across the room.

Someone came moments later, handing Harry the cup who handed you the cup.

“Thanks.” You let out a small gratitude, slightly embarrassed that you’d just gone through that in front of Harry Styles.

“Never had someone die because of me before and didn’t feel like that starting today.” He joked, trying to make you feel better about the situation. He could tell you were embarrassed, but he didn’t want to make the situation worse by telling you that. So, he did the most kind thing and played the situation off as if it was no big deal.

You both remained quiet as track 8 started and then merged into 9, 10, 11, 12. Letting out a big sigh, you prepared yourself for track 13.

“Are you sighing because it was that bad of an album?”

You went red at the cheeks over how he had caught you doing that, but shook your head instantly. “God, no. No, not at all. I’m just terrified of what track 13 will do to me when ‘Fine Line’ absolutely destroys me.” You laughed. Harry laughed. Then you died slightly on the inside because you had just made Harry laugh.

“It’s not like ‘Fine Line’. You don’t have to worry.” He assured you, before smiling and listening to the sounds of Track 13 starting.

Afterwards you felt so empty. You were unsure of what to do with yourself.

You were one of the first few people to listen to Harry’s new album and you were unsure of what you should do with yourself now that you have. You can’t run and tell anyone, you’d signed an NDA that threatened to sue you if you did otherwise. You wanted to run out of the building, climb to the top of the highest building and scream because of how momentous that album was.

His debut album was exquisite. It was simple and full of soulful energy. Then came along its’ sister, ‘Fine Line’ and she absolutely changed your life. The album made you into a happier person, with some of your favourite lyrics ever being written inside of those songs. And now, ‘Harry’s House’. It was just so much bigger than either album before, which seemed quite impossible walking into the room earlier on. Of course you were aware of how much of a musical genius Harry was, but this. This was something special and he would be remembered for it.

You took off your headphone and handed them to someone who was going around collecting them.

“So, what did you think?” Harry asked and you had to turn around to make sure that he was actually asking you.

“Can I be honest?”

“Nothing ever good has come of those words, but, yes, go on.” You could tell he was nervous to hear what you would say.

“It’s your best album.” You smiled, truly meaning that. “And you should be proud of yourself.”

Harry looked quite taken aback, not expecting you to have said anything like that at all. In honesty, he was expecting you to say something like ‘you should be worried for your career’. To hear that really meant a lot.

“Wow.”

“That’s not to say I don’t still completely love your other albums though.” You added quickly, not wanting him to think you were hating on his other children - especially not when they were so good.

“Thank you. Actually, thank you very much.” He spoke sincerely. “Did you have a favourite song?”

“Not yet, but I did love the lyrics “find a moment of calm, colour it in”.”

“Ah yes. Some of my favourite lyrics too actually. Good choice.” He laughed and so did you.

“Are you nervous to hear everyones thoughts on the album?” You asked, even though there would be a Q&A shortly you just wanted to get a head start. Others were talking in their small circles. Jeff was co-ordinating stuff with the manager of the event. A few girls were watching over you and Harry talking, probably wishing they were now the introverted type that sits in the corner surrounded by empty seats.

“Of course, yes. Not everyone will like my music though and that’s okay. Just as I don’t like... Rock music for example.”

“You don’t like rock music?”

“No, I do but it was just the first thing that came to my head.” He chuckled, but still managed to get his point across anyways.

“I’ll compile a book of all the nice things people have said about you, your new album and its lyrics, and maybe try to give it to you at my concert.” You suggested, but when you left here today you were going straight to the shops to buy book to get started on the project.

“You’re coming to ‘Love On Tour’?” He asked, smiling as if you’d just told him that you were buying him a golden retriever.

“In Manchester, yes.”

“Where abouts?”

“Just general standing. I’ll make people pass it down towards you though.”

“I’ll be sure to look out for you...”

“Y/N.”

“Y/N. It was lovely meeting you and I hope to see you again soon.”

He gave you a huge and a small squeeze. You now never wanted to wash your body ever again. As he pulled away and made his way back over to Jeff you couldn’t help but think, did you just become best-friends with Harry Styles?

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trex98dreams · 2 years

Text

Still With You

Member: Jeon Jungkook Genre: Angst / Smut 💔💋 Song Inspired: Still With You - Jungkook (BTS) Summary: He was betrayed when he found out his dream girl was dating his most trusted hyung. But why can't he see that she's just using him, while you were there to pick up the pieces of his shattered heart?

You and Jungkook were best friends.

Your friendship with him doesn't start off like those cliche movies, being best friend since childhood or meeting him at a simple college party. In fact, your friendship with him was unique.

You were one of his long-time fan, adoring him from afar when one day, he stopped by the coffee shop you worked at on the way to practice. Long story short, after he saw you solving a Rubik cube while waiting for his americano, he asked if you could teach him how solve it so he can brags about it to his hyungs.

You were speechless as first, introducing yourself with trembling fingers and told him you were his fan. Not the weird creepy ones though but just a fan who likes to watch his performance on TV or listens to his newly awaited comeback. He was super happy when he heard that, and that's where you 2 took it off.

Now it has been a few years since that day, and everyday, Jungkook never fails to mesmerize you. He was pretty good at everything. He's young, he had the looks and of course, he's popular as hell. With BTS claiming more and more award both nationally and internationally, his fame and success became the talk of everyone every single day. You were blessed and lucky, even just by being his best friend.

"Hey Y/N!" he greeted you cheerfully one day, when you were invited to his dorm where he and his band mates lives. They had just returned from an oversea tour, and it's been a few months since you last saw him. He hugged you tight and you know you can't control the beating in your heart if he kept you in his embrace longer.

"Hey Kook, hey guys! I bough coffee! And snack!" you announced and his band mates hoorayed in unison. You still remember the pout he gave you that day.

"I'm your best friend. I'm the only one who should be given the attention first," he pretend to sulk but you punch his shoulder lightly. "I basically hug you first. What else do you want?" You giggle and he smile, helping you with the coffee and snacks on your hand.

These kind of interaction was normal between you 2, as you knew Jungkook only sees you as his girl best friend and nothing more.

You knew, you knew you were nothing special compared to her.

Lee Jieun.

Jungkook's dream girl. The most popular and ethereal looking singer and actress of all time. She is so pure and timid and graceful and everything... everything that you're NOT. That's why.. staying friends with Jungkook was more than enough for you. You knew how much he adores her and even if you confesses your feelings, it might just jeopardize your friendship with him.

Of course it hurts. You had been good at controlling your feelings for him, but some day, some time when he talks about how he wish she was his, you couldn't help but cry when the day was over and he went home after venting his heart on you.

Just like any other normal girl in this world, you're in for it.

You know you had fallen dangerously in love with Jeon Jungkook.

And though his band mates likes to tease the 2 of you, Jungkook will always shush them down by saying, "We're just friends. Don't make it uncomfortable for Y/N!"

That day when he says that, was the day that was so clear to you, that you should never told your feelings about it since you knew, it will ruin your pure friendship with him.

But one day, that change.

All because of his dream girl who is dating his band mate, Min Yoongi.

...

"I'm sorry, but I don't love you Jungkook."

The moment those words came out of her mouth, Jungkook could feel his own heart cracking. He felt as if a venomous pain rise in the pit of his heart. The venom was achingly spreading through it, and he can do nothing but stop it. Jungkook stared at Jieun under his doe eyes.

"But.. noona, I don't understand.. why? You said you like me, you.. you said you like hanging out with me," he ask shakily, unable to hold his disappointment. Jieun bit her velvet lips that Jungkook's been dying to kiss.

She knows he had spend thousand of dollars for this night. The candle light dinner on a rooftop of an elite building. A private helicopter that brings her everywhere around Seoul. The Cartier necklace he purchased for her. She could sense that it was for his confession.

Jieun was a singer as well and she knew, for the longest time, that Jungkook had always said on every interview he had been on that she was his ideal type. But she though all that was long ago. She knew him as her fan, her junior in the music industry. Sure, a lot of other celebrity mentioned that they were her fans as well, but Jungkook, he was on another level. International level. But despite all that, despite her being close to him and his band mates, doesn't mean she feel the same way about him.

"I mean- uh, I really appreciate all this, I swear I do Kookie," she replied hesitantly making Jungkook's doe eyes continue to wait for her answer. "I love the times we spent together, doing the collaboration and all but other than that, I only see you as Yoongi's band mate and my junior in the industry..." Jieun utters the last part as soft as she can.

Jungkook's doe eyes blink rapidly when she told him that.

So all those months recording songs with her was just her being professional? Is that what she's trying to say? Then why did she caress his hair every time she left the studio? Why did she wipe his sweat with a towel when she visits them during practice? Why did she came by and praise ONLY him for his hard works?

"I.. I though you already knew.. Yoongi.. he didn't tell you?" Jieun asked, putting down the Cartier necklace that she can clearly afford by herself. Jungkook could feel his own heart trembling. He hope where this is going is not true.

"Don't noona. I don't-"

"I'm dating Yoongi, Jungkook-ah."

That 4 word was enough to make Jungkook feel betrayed. Of all the people, in all the world. Why? Why must it be his hyung? And why must he do this to him, knowing he's in love with Jieun for the longest time?

"I- I think you should know. That's why I agree to do the collaboration. We've been talking for a while, and Yoongi and I share a lot of common interest than you know. We.. we've began dating even before the collaboration. I'm so sorry Jungkook. I know you always said I'm your dream girl.. but.. he's MY dream man. I'm sorry for making things go like this. It was never my intention to be in between you and your band mate but I can't control my feelings either. We both should have told you earlier," she apologize repeatedly, knowing well that she had broken his heart beyond repair.

Jungkook stops her hand from holding him.

"I.. I need a minute. I can't.. I can't process all this, I'm sorry. I'll send someone to pick you up and send you to your apartment," Jungkook utters sadly, his eyes were full of tears by now. He avoid her gaze and turn around, leaving the rooftop with a heavy cloud on his head.

That day, Jungkook felt as if his whole world collapse.

...

A knock on your apartment wake you up. It was 3 AM. Who the hell could be knocking on your door at times like this?

You didn't answer, instead you sleepily made your way and to the door, where you found a drunk looking Jungkook lean against your door.

His heavy body weakly limp on yours. You were lucky you were strong enough in your sleepy state to not fall to the hard floor. "Hey, Kook? Are you alright? What's with the suit? Oh! You told me you're going to ask Jieun unnie out today didn't you? How'd it... go-"

"She rejects me Y/N," he utters in one breath.

His voice was so weak, as if he had been in battle but you can hear every word. You pull him to the couch and put him down, sitting beside him sadly. You cupped his cheeks with your small hand, finding how heart-breaking his state is right now.

Jungkook's face was red from the booze, his jet black hair and tie messy. Though his does eyes that you adore so much were closed, you can see the traces of wet tears on his reddish cheek, probably crying his heart out after being rejected by his dream girl.

You knew about today. He told you and planned the day with you for months. You know it's not your place to be jealous, Jungkook loved Jieun even before he was famous and even before he was friends with you. But your heart ached the day he first told you about it. He says he can date freely now, and he was finally going to ask his dream girl out. You cry to yourself that night, stupidly hoping that it was you he was planning the date for but you know, it was just a wishful dream. Though you're still with him, he only thinks about her. Only wanted her.

You cry every time you got home after pretending to be happy and spend the day with him planning the date. You cry every time you think about how lucky Jieun is to be loved by him. You cried harder when you think about how they would spend the night under the sheets with each other when she accepts his confession. It was just hard on you alone.

But this.. what is this? What happen to them? You don't understand, what had gone wrong?

"I'm so sorry Kook. Why? Did she say the reason-"

Jungkook sobs harder, "She- she said she's in a relationship with Yoongi hyung. She said she only sees me as fucking Yoongi's band mate and her junior. I though.. when she says she'll love to do a collab with me, I finally had my chance, that she too- oh," Jungkook cried on your wet shirt, clinging onto you suddenly.

You were shocked. Too shocked.

You understand why Jungkook was crying so much that time, because he was hurt and betrayed by the 2 people he loves most. It's like Arthur, Guinevere & Lancelot all over again.

Jieun.. she's in a relationship with Yoongi?

But, but didn't Yoongi knew that Jungkook had always had a crush on her?

And Jieun.. how could she date Yoongi of all people?

"Can you believe it Y/N?? Yoongi hyung! Hyung got her!" he told you. "She was fucking hyung behind me all these while! HAHAHA... and here I am.. desperately wishing she was looking my way," Jungkook babbles angrily.

He looks pathetic, but this look on him made your heart uneasy. You loved Jungkook with your whole heart. Him being betrayed like this must have hurt him beyond repair. You hug him tight, caressing his hair while altogether crying with him.

"I swear Jungkook, I swear I'll still be with you. I'll never betray you. I'm sorry, I'm sorry for what happen to you tonight, It'll get better. I promise I'll always be your friend.. I'll always be there for you, I'm sorry Jungkook.. I'm sorry," you told him, hugging his face close to your chest.

That night, Jungkook cried himself to sleep in his drunken state. Slowly, you reach for his cheek when he fell asleep on your chest, wiping his tears. Your heart aches a lot when you see him like this, and you promise, as his friend and for the love your harbored for him, you'll be there to pick up the pieces Jieun left behind.

...

Yoongi and Jungkook's friendship change after that.

What had been a brotherly love between the 2, a dongsaeng loving his hyung and adoring his work so much, turn into something salty when Yoongi talked it out with Jungkook. Everybody in the band decide not to interfere because they knew it was something personal. Even the management didn't interfere and when they ask Yoongi if he wanted to make his relationship with Jieun public, he told them not yet. He had discussed things with Jieun after spending time at her place and Jieun told them its safer for both of their career, especially with Yoongi going to America for his mixtape soon and her doing concert tours around South Korea for the next few months.

The boys were the most troubled ones regarding this news. They didn't choose sides, but they knew how much Jungkook loves Jieun and Yoongi becoming her boyfriend was out of the blue.

One day, after one of their recording session with Yoongi, Jungkook was asked to stay. He wanted to leave so much, but Namjoon was so adamant for the 2 of them to talk it out. So Jungkook have no choice but to drop his bag to the ground, and plop himself on the couch in Yoongi's studio lazily.

Yoongi turn off his mixers and put his earphone down.

"What do you want? Hurry up, I had things to do," Jungkook uttered harshly. Yoongi look at his sunken posture and sit upwards from his work chair, intertwining his fingers.

"Jungkook.. I know its been an awkward few weeks between us.." he sighs. "I know. It's my fault. I'm sorry. I'm sorry for falling for your girl. I didn't mean for it to happen. You know I can't control who I love, I do tried to avoid it, but then Jieun told me she feels the same. Please Jungkook.. it's killing me. Jieun hadn't been eating well because she was worried about our friendship, don't put the blame on her too much, it's my fault. It's my entire fault for ruining our friendship."

"Friendship?" Jungkook snorted. "I respected you. I love you like my own brother, but you go and date the one girl I told everyone I had a crush on! I know! I know you can't force love hyung! But I can't believe you of all people would do this to me! I- ah.. you know what.. just forget it.."

Jungkook's defeated sigh made Yoongi felt a lot more terrible. "Jungkook please, for the sake of Bangtan, I beg of you, forgive me. It's my fault. Don't punish Jieun because of it. She misses you. She misses talking to the old you. You were like a brother to her too. Please Jungkook, if you want, I'll break up with her if that's-"

"That's not it hyung," he hissed. Somehow, he knew it was just wrong if it end up jeopardizing his beloved girl's relationship with his hyung. Just because he can't stand them dating in front of him. Isn't that too childish? And besides, Jieun didn't eat well because she was worried about them? No, he didn't want her to get sick. He still cares for her despite what happen between them.

"Just.. please don't mention about this anymore. About noona, I can't just pretend like she didn't just rejected me. Give me some time.. I can't just act like nothing happened, tell her to eat well," he said and left, making Yoongi let out a soft sigh.

...

"Who is it?" you ask from inside.

A weak voice answered slowly, "It's me Y/N. Open up, please."

For the past few weeks, Jungkook had been crashing at your place, and told you about how his day go. He used to vent it out on Jieun when she came by the dorm, but you knew that was no longer necessary, because of how bad the condition of his heart is now. And Jungkook refuse to sleep at the dorm too, knowing Yoongi and Jieun would be there. He doesn't want their relationship to hurt him more and decided to just stay at yours.

As you open the door, once again you were met with his teary eyes. He stare at you sadly and immediately hug you, sniffing on your shoulder like an injured child.

"Yoongi hyung apologize today.. and he told me he would break up with noona if I wanted him to as not to ruin Bangtan.." he murmured, hugging you by the waist tightly. "Y/N.. am I the bad guy? It hurts so much to see them together.. to know he spends the night at hers.. but I don't want them to break up just because they're hurting me.. I hate this feeling.. why can't I just erase it?"

You patted his back. It's been like this everyday. It kills you to see this side of him. The sad, guilty and heartbroken part. He was smiling in front of the camera but behind those smile were a broken heart needed to be mend. You caress his hair and look at him from under your glasses confidently.

"I'm so sorry Kook. It's not your fault. It's not theirs either.." you said and murmured to yourself, except the part where they hide it from you and Jieun's been giving you mixed signal.

"Hey Kook listen, today's my day off," you said, wiping his tears with a tissue in your pocket. He look up and found you smiling cheerfully at him.

"Okay?" he sniffed. You laughed at his adorable reaction. "So, as your best friend, I hate seeing you like this. Even your fans starting to notice how sad you've looked the past few weeks. Come on, I'll bring you somewhere to make you forget about it temporarily. How's that?"

He stare at you for a long time and shook his head. "I don't know.. I'm not in the mood.."

"Oh stop mopping around you will ya! Jieun doesn't love you! Yoongi betray you! So what? Doesn't mean that you stopped living your life! Come on, I guarantee, I can make my old pal Jeon Jungkook become him again!" you cheered although gritted your teeth at Jieun and Yoongi's name. Jungkook blinked his eyes rapidly. He let out a huge sigh at your determined reaction.

"Okay.. I trust you. Where are we going by the way?"

...

"Why are you so competitive??" you ask him and he nods cracked into a laugh. "Can we try it again? I can't lose to a girl!" he laughed and that was the 1st time in 7 weeks you had heard him laugh sincerely like the old Jungkook. You were happy that he was enjoying his time at the Carnival. Most importantly, you were happy that it was you who made him smile.

"I'm glad you're enjoying things Kook. Hey! That's my teddy bear! I was distracted!" you giggled and he shot the cans like a pro, earning the big teddy bear all by himself. The stall keeper smile and hands him the huge teddy bear. "This is so not fair Kook. You shot him when I was distracted!"

Jungkook giggled back at you and gave you the bear. "Here, take it. You were struggling back there but I know you won't admit it. It was for you anyways," he said and you blush. "God, I don't need to be manhandled okay? So, are you feeling.. better? Does the shooting, roller coaster and bumpy ride made you at ease even just a little bit?"

Jungkook let out a sad smile, staring at the Ferris Wheel. "A bit.. but it still hurts.."

You bit your lip to the side but then he turns to you with a charming smile. "Thank you for tonight Y/N. You're such a good friend. You did all these.. just because you worry about me.. I really don't know what I'd do without you. You're really a great friend. Thank you, I love you a lot for this," he says carelessly.

Upon hearing the word love, your eyes widened. Jungkook didn't seem to notice this, as he was busy staring at the couple in the boat in front of you. Your heart beats faster and you told yourself to calm down and not freak out just because he said the L word.

"Hey, wanna try that?" He ask you. You turn to where he was pointing. A boat in the middle of the lake? You shook your head and fix your glasses.

"Oh maybe next time when it's day. I can't swim and I'm afraid of being in the waters during the night," you told him. This was new to Jungkook.

"You can't swim? Really? The smart girl who can solve a rubik cube in 10 seconds? WOW, what else are you hiding from me?" His reaction was so genuine that you forget about his situation.

Jungkool listens to you attentively. You knew, he was doing it to forget the pain but you can't push away the attention he was giving you. That night made you happy, as Jungkook is finally trying to move on from his broken heart.

Weeks and weeks after that, Jungkook spends more of his time with you. Even his members were jealous because he kept going to yours to play video games, helping you with groceries like and old married couple and ask for your advice about his singing improvements though you knew nothing of the matter. You weren't one to rush things, and you were waiting for the perfect time until Jungkook is completely over Jieun for you to tell him how you feel. You had weighed the pros and cons and even if Jungkook cut ties with you after your confession, you're glad that he is feeling better than the him before the Yoongi-Jieun betrayal.

"Yoongi hyung went to America today, for his mixtape collaboration with Snoop Dog," he told you after you guys finish watching the avengers marathon.

"Oh really? For how long?" You asked, lowering the volume of the TV. Jungkook's eyes trained on the TV, but you knew his mind was somewhere else.

"3 months? I don't know. We sent him off together, but I didn't talk much with him.. you know how we are. He told us to look after Jieun noona as well," he drink a sip of his coke.

You went quiet. Not that you were insecure, but Jieun's a big girl. She can take care of herself. Knowing what he did to Jungkook, why would Yoongi leave such an inconsiderate message?

"I know he was saying it to all of the boys. But as I'm the closest to her, I felt like he trusted me the most. But.. ah- I don't know. Not like I care about her anymore," Jungkook mutters but you know he's lying. His eyebrow furrows when he lie or hesitates. You know he still cares about her.

Being a girl whose in love with his guy best friend sucks, so you suck it up and smile at him, patting his shoulder. "Don't worry. If anything happens, I got your back and besides, I bet she won't call you first just because she's lonely."

"Yeah."

...

That's exactly what she did.

Yoongi was gone for 3 weeks when she 1st call. Jungkook was at your place, setting the table for dinner as it had been a long day for him at the practice room. You and him were laughing at the burned turkey he was trying to make when his phone rang.

Both of you look at the caller ID.

"Jieun?" You asked him, turning the stove off. Jungkook was surprised as well.

He wanted to reject the call, but you knew he was hesitating. "Just pick it up, maybe she's in trouble?" You told him, trying to be positive.

Jungkook waited for a few seconds before hastily pushing the accept button.

"What do you want noona?"

"..."

"What?"

"..."

You watch as Jungkook made his way to the living room to talk to her in private. A dull ache was appearing on your chest, but you ignored it. Just because a call doesn't mean Jungkook's going to run back to her after what she did. Besides, she rejected him? Right?

Jungkook came in your line of view after a few minutes. He gave you a contemplated look before raking his hair. "I'm sorry about that," Jungkook closes his eyes. "Y/N, Jieun noona told me the power in her building was cut off. She is scared of the dark, I knew that because she told me once. Do you think.. I should.."

Your heart was heavy after listening to what he was going to ask you so you cut him off, "Kook, she lives in an elite apartment. I'm sure the lights would come out in a few minutes, are you going to do this all over again?"

Jungkook stare at the ground.

"But she is very terrified of the dark.. and she says it might be half an hour since all the other apartments are cut off too.."

His mutters was what made you sure that no matter what you do, he still cares for her. Maybe this was just a coincidence, so you let out a huge sigh.

"Go. If you're that worried, go. I also don't want to be responsible if anything happens to our superstar Lee Jieun," you told him flatly. Jungkook stare at you, feeling guilty that he had to abandoned your dinner plans. "I'm sorry Y/N.. I promise this will be the only time-"

It wasn't.

It wasn't the only time he cancelled his plans with you. Ever since that call, he had been spending his time with her again, especially when Yoongi told him to look after Jieun in his absence.

He had cancelled your zoo date, your grocery shopping date, trying out new dessert at the local Cafe every week date and most importantly, he rarely shows up at your place anymore. Of course, with every cancellation, Jungkook will always apologize and you knew from the tone of his voice it was sincere, since you can't find any fault in the man you love.

"I'm sorry Y/N, Jieun noona ask me to fix the light bulb in her bathroom."

"I had to cancel again today, Jieun noona aren't feeling well, her throat is swelling."

"I am so sorry Y/N, Jieun noona needed me to help with her IKEA stuff."

And the list goes on. You were frustrated, upset and angry that the only thing she need to do is call him and Jungkook will come running back to her like she didn't just broke his heart a few months ago. You worked so hard to mend his heart and now what? For it to be a plaything for her until Yoongi came back from America?

You had tried to warn Jungkook. During your calls, you had told him to be careful, not to easily be swayed with her kindness and remember that she is his hyung's girlfriend no matter what but Jungkook would just laughed it off.

"You're ridiculous Y/N. I knew that okay? You don't need to rub the salt on my wound. I'm just helping her in times of need, and return the favor because she used to help me a lot too back then. Don't worry and get some sleep. I'll came by when I'm finish here and practice," he would always say.

You hated doubting him. Because you know you're no one to him to be jealous. Not his lover, not his wife, not his girlfriend, not anything. You're only a friend. A friend that is so in love with him. A friend that is scared to see him getting his heart broken again.

...

Tonight, it was pouring rain.

The rain hadn't stopped for a while and according to the weather forecast, it would probably stop tomorrow afternoon. You stared at your phone, looking at the wallpaper of you and Jungkook at the Carnival a few months back. You 2 look so happy, like a couple in love.

He had promised to sleep at yours tonight. After what it feels like a long time, Jungkook called you this morning and tell you he's going straight to yours with a chicken and beer because be misses his best friend so much. What's better is Jieun is going on her concert tour soon, so this might mark the day where Jungkook will be all yours again.

So here you are, sitting on your couch in your pajamas, waiting for the boy you love with a smile. An hour become two, and finally, unable to open your eyes anymore, you feel asleep while waiting for Jungkook.

...

"Thank you so much for sending me here Kookie. I'm sorry.. my car broke down suddenly and I have no one else to call. My manager is stuck in traffic as well," Jieun smiles charmingly to Jungkook. Jungkook nods and gave her a thin smile.

"It's okay noona. Besides, I'm familiar with this hotel. We had a concert at Gocheok Dome too once. We stayed here for a 3 whole days so it wasn't hard to find."

Jieun stare at the bunny boy for a long time. He misses Yoongi a lot, but Yoongi's absence was making her so frustrated. She didn't even know why she kept calling Jungkook in the 1st place but having him by her side made her feel safe.

"I'm sorry, you got all wet trying to cover me from the rain, would you like to take a shower first before you leave?" She asks him in n innocent tone. Jungkook's eyes widened. "Ah, no thank you. I- have somewhere to be actually noona, I-"

A thunder suddenly cracked.

Jieun immediately threw her petite body to Jungkook's bulky one. She hugs him tightly, hearing his loud drumming heartbeat in her ear. Jungkook can feel her breast on his chest and begin to feel aroused, but he shook those thoughts away and softly push her against her hotel room’s door.

"Ah- noona, I'm sorry. I gotta go! I-"

"It's pouring rain Jungkookie..." Jieun pinch his arms softly. Jungkook gulps but didn't say anything, he didn't understand what Jieun is trying to do right now.

Jungkook was still in his right mind when in a spur of a moment, Jieun closes the distance between them and reach for his lips, kissing him passionately. Jungkook try, oh he really did, pushing her away but her soft kiss made him dizzy.

This was his dream all along.

To be loved by Lee Jieun.

"Noona.. this- this wrong.." he tried although he wanted nothing more than the kiss to last but Jieun harshly grab the back of his hair, tangling her fingers while clinging onto his wet shirt.

"Just for tonight Kookie.. just tonight. I'm so needy baby. It's been so long since Yoongi touched me. Make me feel like a woman again.. please..."

Her seductive pleads made Jungkook lost his right mind and that's when he finally give in to his lust, ignoring what's right and wrong between them.

The thunder cracked harder with every minute passing by, covering the sinful sound of the smacking of their lips. Jieun jumps on his waist, circling her legs around him and Jungkook held her thighs, going in for the kiss deeper. He reach for the hem oh her dress and closes the door to the hotel room, locking it behind them.

...

Jungkook didn't call you for 3 days straight.

You were sure he had his reasons. Jungkook never cancels without telling you why. You were getting anxious, afraid something had happened to him but it made you calmed yourself as there is no bad news about him on the TV is reported. So probably, he's fine. You asked his members where he might have been but they also told you they had no idea, thinking he's staying at your place.

"What?"

Hoseok rubbed his nape at the other end of the line.

[Jungkookie texted me saying he's staying at your place for the past 3 days. UuU~ Is this something we shouldn't know Y/N? Are you 2 finally a thing??]

You were confused. What is Hoseok talking about? Did Jungkook just lie to his members?

"The thing is oppa, Jungkook's not here-"

The sound of knocking at your door surprised you. "Oppa, someone's at the door. I'll call you later, sorry for taking your time," you told Hoseok.

[It's okay! See you Y/N! Tell Jungkookie to announce you guy's relationship public soon!]

You end the call with a smile at Hoseok's silliness. No. It's not the time for that. Wait. Why would Jungkook lie to them telling them he's staying with you for the past 3 days when he's not. He's been avoiding your calls and text as well.

"Y/N? Open up, it's me!"

Speak of the devil.

You're going to give him the scolding of his life, a piece of your mind and a knocking on his head for making you worried the past few days. You stomp your way to the door, half happy and half angry that he's making you anxious.

You unlock the door and almost greet him with a hit on his head, when he engulfed you in a hug.

"Y/N! I MISS YOU SO MUCH! I HAVE A REALLY GREAT NEWS!!" Jungkook yelled, spinning you around the living room. You were baffled of course, but his strong hands on your waist made you paused to keep the feeling.

When he let go, you look into his happy face, shining eyes that had stars scattered inside it. Gosh, Jungkook's eyes are so beautiful. You can't believe you got to ever see him this happy again. "Hey- hey- woah! You're in a good mood! But first, where the hell did you go for the past 3 days huh?! Did you know how worried I am??"

Jungkook smiles and rubbed his palms together, apologizing for his MIA.

"I know, I know! But I had my reasons, I'm sorry okay? But first let me tell you-"

"Did you even eat? You look so tired.. I'll cook some ramyeon and sit down. Now what's the good news you cannot wait to tell me about? And may I ask, why did you tell Hoseok oppa you're staying with me for the past 3 days you went missing-"

"Jieun noona and I are together now Y/N!"

BOOM.

Those 8 words. Those dreadful 8 words that you though wouldn't come true. It did. And Jungkook broke it to you with the widest smile, not realizing it made your heart split open and bleeds invisibly.

You slowly retreat your step from the kitchen and turn to him confusedly.

"Jungkook.. haven't you moved on yet? Jieun unnie is with Yoongi oppa.. what are you talking about?" your eyebrow furrowed. Why is he still talking about this? You tried, SO hard to keep him away from talking and thinking about her after she rejected him. You can't bear to see him like this and had his heart broke again and again by the same girl.

Jungkook took a step further and held your shoulder. His smile was so full of love and happiness that the radiation kills the old, sad him that you've been trying to repair. "That's the thing Y/N! That's the news I'm going to tell you! She says she's breaking up with Yoongi hyung to be with me! Oh god, can you believe it Y/N? She chooses me! Finally!"

Everything becomes a blur after that. You didn't want to say anything, not until Jungkook finish his story of how did all this happen in just a matter of 3 days.

Jungkook sits down on your kitchen counter while you made him some ramyeon. You listen. Listen through it all. Listen about how he tells you about the rainy night 3 days ago where he was supposed to spend it with you watching Iron Man. You listen as he told you how Jieun calls him and ask for his help to send her to the hotel near Gocheok Dome for her concert. You listen as the night that was suppose to be your confession night turn out to be the night he endlessly make love to his beloved Jieun noona under the sheets at her hotel.

You clench your hand on the hot bowl tightly, preventing the tears from falling from your eyes as he told you how she was lonely and Yoongi didn't give her the love she wanted from him. You listens as he told you Jieun promised to break up with Yoongi so that they could date and she was wrong for choosing Yoongi instead of him who cherishes and worships her much more.

You gulp. Everything seems wrong. You didn't know why. Maybe you wanted to own Jungkook. Maybe you were jealous. Maybe you love him too much that you cannot accept the fact that Jungkook just slept with his best friend's girlfriend.

Jieun was cheating on Yoongi with Jungkook, but poor lovesick Jungkook doesn't seem to realize that. You look at his dreamy eyes and bunny smile, afraid that what you might say may upset him when he realize it.

"Y/N? Are you listening?" he asks, waving in front of you. "Hm? Oh, yeah, yeah absolutely. I just- so.. for the past 3 days.. you were at the hotel.. with Jieun?"

Your question made him smile. "Yup! Don't get me wrong! We didn't just 'do it' you know! We played games, talk like old times, and she kisses me a lot, saying I'm different from hyung because hyung doesn't like PDA. Ah- I'm so happy Y/N! I'm so happy that she finally chooses me! Poor hyung, not that I didn't feel bad, but Jieun noona can't control how she feels and neither can I, I'm not a bad guy right Y/N?"

Something made you snapped. You look at him from across the kitchen counter top and give him a glare. "Jungkook, I hate to break it to you, but no matter what you say, you're still the bad guy here."

Jungkook's smile falters. "What do you mean? I'm happy Y/N, so is Jieun noona. Do you want to see me depressed all the time because I can't erase her from my mind? FYI, I still like her."

"Kook listen," you said reaching for his palm. "1, she cheated on Yoongi oppa by sleeping with you. No matter what, her excuse is unacceptable. I myself am horrified when you reveal all this so suddenly. And you, how could you sleep with her knowing what she did to you and who she is to your hyung? She rejected you Jungkook!"

He turns his face away, not having an excuse to what they had done. "Number 2, you're a good guy Jungkook but this is just fucked up. Had she break up with Yoongi yet when she promises you all this? Had you not the slightest idea how it would turn out for you and your members when a girl came between you guys? Yoongi will be so hurt. Was she serious when she says she chooses you? Because if she wasn't, then she is just using you as her sex toy-"

"Shut up!" Jungkook burst out angrily. You look at him in shock. You were just stating the fact. You love him and you didn't want to say beat around the bush just to set himself at ease because this is just VERY wrong.

Jungkook stand up harshly, the chair behind him falls down with a loud bang. "SHE'S NOT USING ME Y/N! JIEUN NOONA LOVES ME! She didn't want to break up with hyung over some text, that's why we're waiting for him to come back! Just because I pleased her doesn't mean that I'm a sex toy! That means she loves me more than she did to hyung! And why should I care if Yoongi hyung is hurt or not?! HE STEALS MY GIRL! Serves him right!"

Jungkook's selfish word made your eyes dull, and your heart breaks. How could an innocent boy turn into this selfish, greedy man just because of love? This isn't love, this.. is toxic.

Jungkook reached for his jacket on the couch. You reach for him desperately. "Kook, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry about what I said. I didn't mean for it to come out like that. I didn't want you to get hurt Kook. Are you sure she choosing you? Please at least, stay away from her until Yoongi gets back. You guys need to talk first before you 2-"

"I lost my virginity to her Y/N. It wasn't just lust. She is the only girl I love and the only girl I will do anything for. If she said she choose me, then she is. I believe her because Jieun's not a desperate clingy person like you." He said without caring what had just come out of his mouth.

"I'm going. I'm spending my time with my girlfriend now. You don't need to check up on me and tell my hyungs anything. I'll settle this myself."

As he closes the door behind him, you slide down against it, crying your eyes out. How can love be this painful? How can Jungkook hurt you, the one who had pick up the scattered parts of his heart? This isn't going to end well, you know it.

...

Your friendship with Jungkook begins to fade as day goes by. You pretend like you didn't care, but everyone noticed and they knew you do. Your colleague at the coffee shop stare at you for a long time before asking, "Hey, don't be too sad. You're going home anyways after your graduation. Why don't you try giving him a last call and told him about it?"

You turn to her and let out a sad smile. "I tried many times but he turn off his phone. He's busy you know. With practice.. and his new girlfriend, the girl of his dreams. It's okay, I fucked up anyways. He was just a temporary distraction for me here. People come and go like water," you told your colleague, making her pat your back softly.

"But don't you love him though?"

Her question caught you off guard. You went silent for a few minutes. "I did. I even mend his heart. But it wasn't the same as how she did it. She's good at fixing it with just a kiss, while I needed weeks and months to heal it. It doesn't matter anymore. He says he'll do anything for her and believe her more, that's enough for me to know that he doesn't care."

Your colleague look at you sadly. You were a kind girl. You were just a simple, college girl with glasses who work hard and happen to fall in love with your best friend slash superstar Jeon Jungkook. What an unfortunate event in your life.

Your colleague turn the TV on and the celebrity news reported that Min Yoongi of Bangtan had just return from America this morning. Yoongi looks casual and handsome as ever, with his black outfits and white mask covering his face. He was walking tiredly at Incheon Airport into the black van that is waiting for him. You remember what Jungkook told you a few weeks ago. About Jieun's plan to break up with Yoongi once he gets here. You wish the best for all 3 of them of course. You're done getting tangled in their complicated relationship, especially after Jungkook called you clingy and desperate.

Clingy and Desperate.

Your eyes let out a small tear and quickly wipe it with your apron.

"Hana, can you change the channel please?"

...

"Hyung you're back!" Hoseok waddled and hugs Yoongi tightly. He had just finish coming up with a new dance routine and is sweating from head to toe. "Hey Hoba! Gosh, I miss you guys so much! Where are all the others? Did they skip practice because I'm not here again?" he asks.

"Nah, they boys are resting. We're on break until you get back for our next comeback. Say, you're going straight home or are you going to wait for me like the kindhearted brother you are??"

Yoongi cracked a smile. "Do you think I don't miss my girl? I'm just stopping by to get some stuff before heading to Jieun's. It's been 3 months and the video calls are enough until this point. Did you guys look after her like I told you to?"

Hoseok rolls his eyes. "She's an adult hyung! Gosh! And why would we look after her? She had her bodyguards, managers and staff to look after! Ew- now go. Go be lovey dovey with your girlfriend."

Yoongi only smile at his remarks. He took out a mickey doll he bough for Hoseok and hand it to him. "Woah! What's this.. hyung! This is limited edition, this is why I love you best hyung! Thank you!"

Yoongi cleared out his throat. "I bought a gift for each. You guys were always on my mind while I'm doing my mixtape," he told Hoseok. Hoseok beams out a smile that shows how grateful he is for having such a thoughtful brother. That was until something made him hesitate. "Uh.. hyung?"

Yoongi look at him.

"Did you buy one for.. Jungkookie too?"

Yoongi stare at him blankly, and then smile.

"Of course I did. What happened between us doesn't mean I love him less. I hope we can patch things up slowly, truth is I miss Jungkookie. It was my fault entirely for not telling him the truth from the beginning. But I hope my relationship with Jieun can be acknowledge after this. Especially by him. He is a special little dongsaeng to me Hoba," Yoongi's words were so sincere.

"I hope so too hyung. Haven't seen him much lately. He's still saying at his friend Y/N's house ever since you left for America. Maybe you should call him or went to her house to surprise him," Hoseok advises him.

"Sure do, but I'm going to my girlfriend's first. See you later Hoba," Yoongi fist bump him and Hoseok smile, waving away.

...

Yoongi went inside the posh apartment soon after he entered the pass code which is his birthday. "Babe, I'm home! Surprise!"

Usually Jieun would be in the living room watching her performance and how to improve it, or writing lyrics for her next album. Yoongi search for her in the bedroom, thinking she was probably having a shower. To his disappointment, she's not anywhere in the house.

Yoongi took out his phone and look at his reminder that had their schedule. Jieun had already finish her tour a week ago so she's really free for the next month.

"Where could she be?" He mutters to himself. He tried calling her, but it was send straight to her voicemail. Yoongi dialed for someone and he let out a huge sigh of relief when the person pick it up.

[Oh! Yoongi ah! How are you??]

It was Jieun's manager, Kyungsang.

"Hey hyung, I'm great! It's been a while," Yoongi smile to himself. "Hyung, is Jieun with you? Did she go out and have dinner at bizarre restaurants again? Can you please tell her to pick up her phone? I've been dying to see her."

[Oh? But I haven't seen her for a while. She gave me a break ever since she started her concert tours and I'm taking care of my grandma right now,] Kyungsang told him and he heard the coughing of an old woman at the back. Yoongi bit her lip.

"Ah.. really hyung? Okay, so sorry to bother you. I'll try looking for her myself. Did you happen to know where she's staying after the tour ended? I bet she's having fun in the pool at a hotel or something." Yoongi smile stupidly as he said this, knowing Jieun's likes and dislikes were really one of his things now.

Kyungsang wonder for a while. [Last I heard, she told me she's staying at M hotel near Gocheok Dome. That's all I know, didn't know if she's still staying there though.]

Yoongi thanked the loyal manager and turn off his phone. He was about to put it in his pocket before remembering maybe he should stop by your place to give Jungkook his shoes. He contemplates for a few second before cancelling what he intend to do, putting his girlfriend first above all.

...

"Fuck, fuck, yes, faster- Yes Jungkook, you deserve me baby, ah! That's it- ah yes, that's so good baby, cum for me," Jieun encourage Jungkook's erratic thrust under the sheets. He had his mouth on one of her breast, nibbling on it hungrily.

Jungkook knew it was wrong, but Jieun's seductive ways of convincing him that he was all she wanted was too much for him.

For the past few weeks, he had never been happier. Although they only get to stay at the hotel to keep their relationship a secret, it was more than enough for Jungkook. He loves Jieun too much and if waiting for Yoongi is the only thing standing between his and Jieun's love, he was willing to do this everyday. During the times he was at the hotel, while waiting for Jieun to finish her showers or cooking, Jungkook can feel his guilt by ignoring your text. Of course, he misses you but his pride is too big to acknowledge his mistake. That is why he prefer staying with Jieun all the time like a golden retriever.

Jungkook thrust slowly, making sure he's appreciating every inch of her body.

"Harder baby, we've been doing this everyday, are you still afraid of hurting me?" Jieun whisper in his ears and kisses his lips. Jungkook eyed his dream girl underneath him lovingly.

"You're so beautiful noona, fuck I love you," Jungkook told her but Jieun just replied with a smirk. "Faster Kookie, I need to cum, fuck you're still so hard baby, give me your cum hmm? My good boy," she moans, her hair sprawled gorgeously on the pillow. Her palms grabs Jungkook's firm ass and push himself deeper in her.

Jungkook begin to thrust at an inhuman speed, his face buried in Jieun's neck.

"Ah- you're so tight noona, I'm going to- I'm going to- fuck-"

Jieun held his cheeks, breathing heavily, "Me too baby, cum, cum for me, oh, yes! Yes! "

Just before they both climaxed, the door to the bedroom burst open, stopping both of then from their sinful act. Jungkook cover Jieun with his body, thinking it was her management team or room service since he forgot to lock the door earlier but to their horror.. it was Yoongi.

His pale face was paler, he looks angry, disappointed and sad all mixed in one. His sharp eyes showed a hint of sadness of this immoral betrayal between the girl he loves and his little brother.

"Yoongs, this isn't- this isn't what it looks like.. I can explain! I- I was lonely! And- and after our fight-"

But Jieun's panic voice was cut short. Yoongi dropped the gifts in his hands and threw it on the carpet floor where Jungkook and Jieun's underwear were lying around.

"Fuck you Jungkook. Fuck you too Jieun. We're over. Congratulations Kook, you can finally have her," Yoongi hissed and stop out of the room. Jungkook was glad to hear what he said since to him Yoongi is making it easier, but Jieun panicked and quickly pick up her undergarments, putting on her clothes.

"Noona, where are you going? We're free to date now. Yoongi hyung had let you go-"

"Shut up Jungkook! Fuck, how can I miss today's date?! Fuck fuck fuck, I need to settle this matter, Yoongs baby, wait! I can explain, please!" She snapped at him. Jungkook didn't understand. Wasn't this the point after all? For them to break up because she chooses him?

"Noona, but you said you choose me-"

But Jieun was gone.

Jungkook stare at the door, hugging his knees close to his chest and hear his heart broke for the second time by her.

...

"Who is it?"

The voice didn't answer. You went to your front door and cursed yourself for not having a door with a peeling hole. You standby with a baseball bat and swiftly open the door when Jungkook's sad eyes met yours.

"Kook? What are you doing here? I-"

"I'm so sorry Y/N. I'm sorry.. You were right, I'm just a sex toy to her! Y/N, it hurts.. it hurts so much.. I'm in so much pain right now.." he cried and cried endlessly. Jungkook's hair were a mess, you notice the bite mark and lipstick stain on his neck which made your heart crack but who are you kidding? You just can't push him away. With your heart barred open once more, you reach for his face and pull him in your embrace.

"It's okay Jungkook.. I forgive you. Hey, don't cry.. it's alright.." you cradle him into your arms. Jungkook's sniff got louder and his tears broke your heart once more so you wipe it with your fingers.

Again, you bring him to your couch, picking up the shattered pieces of his heart left by Jieun. Jungkook spend the night at yours, and teary apologize for everything and told you everything that had happen. You were angry of course, and now you know what kind of person Jungkook's dream girl truly is. You told yourself it's not wrong of you to hate her before, because she is totally a bitch.

Days after the incident, you called Hoseok and told him what had happen. Hoseok told you that Yoongi's been locking up in his bedroom and not eating and Jieun kept banging at the door to let her see him. You told Hoseok that Jungkook is staying with you for a while, recovering from the empty promise Jieun made him. Hoseok understands and says it's the best for him to stay at yours, since shit's just got real.

What Jungkook did was wrong, and he had realize that. He wanted to apologize to Yoongi, but you advice him maybe its best to let things cool down for a while since cheating is just.. unforgivable and what Jungkook and Jieun did wasn't once, but for weeks since Yoongi was gone.

You begin to cook for Jungkook again, care for him and listens to his heartfelt vent. Every time he cried, you'll always hug his head close to your heart and told him it's going to be alright, he, Yoongi and Jieun just needs some time apart from each other. You were trying your best to make Jungkook happy, since you knew you won't be able to do this anymore in another few weeks. You had just graduated and is going home, but Jungkook fails to notice how clean your house are and how some stuff were missing from its original place.

One night when Jungkook fell asleep on your lap during the nights you guys watch TV together, you stare at his peaceful sleeping face. Though your own heart was broken by him before, you were still so determined to tell him how much he means to you before you left. You smile sadly and made up some plans in your head before falling asleep as well.

...

"Didn't you say you're scared of the lake during the night?" Jungkook ask softly. His voice were so melodious you had foolishly given your heart again.

"I know, but there's something important I meed to tell you tonight, and I can't delay it much longer. Come on, I rented this boat just to cheer you up despite my fear," you chuckle lightly earning a grin from him. Jungkook intertwine his fingers with yours which made you blush and you 2 made your way to the deck.

"It's so beautiful tonight," Jungkook utters, staring at the starlight surrounding you two. "Come on, get in, I'm right behind you," he adds. You smile and held onto his biceps. Gosh, you won't ask for more from god if you just got to keep him all to yourself.

"Shouldn't we wear the safety jacket though?" You ask him. Jungkook looked around. "Nobody's wearing it anyways, besides if something happens I'll save you," he said. As you sit at one end of the boat, Jungkook put one leg inside carefully.

He was about to get in when his phone rang.

You read the expression on his face and immediately knew who it is.

"Y/N.."

"It's her isn't it? Turn it off Kook, you know she's just messing with you. What does she wants now? Did Yoongi really abandoned her after what she did? Then serves her right!" You scolded him. Jungkook's bright face earlier turns dim. You knew, though you lied to yourself, you knew Jungkook wanted to pick up the call.

"Kook, you're hurting yourself. She doesn't care about your feelings.. please Kook," you tried to talk him out of it. Jungkook's doe eyes contemplates. You inhaled a heavy sigh.

"Pick up, hear what she had to say, and turn her down like she did you. Kook you deserve so much better, but I know you still can't get over her. Just.. pick up if that's what you really want to do," you gave up. No matter what you advice him, you knew Jungkook is still clinging to what could have been between him and Jieun.

"Hello, yes noona..?"

"..."

"What?"

"..."

"No! Don't do that! Stay put! Don't you dare harm yourself!"

"...!"

Then he put his phone in the back of his pocket. You wait for his explanation. Jungkook look at you who was sitting inside the boat.

This was the 1st time you begged him. If this don't work as well, you will really give up on him.

"Y/N.. Jieun noona is in trouble. She sounded drunk.. and she was saying something about taking her life, I had to- I'm so sorry Y/N, I had to check on her condition-"

You gulped heavily and stare at him under your glassy eyes. "No matter what her condition is, you run to her the moment she needs you as if someone else can't be there for her. Jeon Jungkook, I only have you. I needed you more than she did, Jungkook please.. just for tonight, stay with me," you begged him weakly.

Jungkook's heart was heavy. You had never beg before. Something about the way your voice sounded so weak and that you needed him more made him immensely guilty. But he can't ignore the phone call with Jieun as well. It would be a lie to say that he doesn't love her anymore, because he still did.

You saw the hesitant in his eyes and voice out once again, "Just for once Jungkook, please, choose me."

Jungkook clench his fist.

"But.. I'm sorry Y/N, Jieun noona- I'm sorry! I'll be right back! I promise, I-"

"Go."

That was the last word you said to him before he run as fast as he can to the parking lot, driving like a maniac to reach the girl who had been giving him nothing but pain and heartbreak. You sat still in the boat, hugging your knees close to your chest and sob out loud, mentally cursing yourself on being stupid just like he did.

While your heart breaks, the boat begin to follow the river's current.

...

When Jungkook rush into the room, Jieun was neither trying to harm herself, or drunk. She was just crying about Yoongi and saying sorry to Jungkook for she realize he was the only one who cared for her when she calls. She told him she did called Yoongi, but it has been days and still he didn't want to see her. Jungkook puts her on her bed but then she reach for his neck and kisses him passionately. Jungkook, being a hot blooded young man with still having some left over feelings for her return the favor and they ended up having sex again.

Jungkook was the first to wake up the next morning.

"Hmmmp, you're so good Kookie. Last night was amazing," Jieun moans as she gave Jungkook a kiss on his shoulder, her naked back turning the other way to check on her phone.

This time, Jungkook feels different. Her kisses were cold, her words were empty, her touch was no longer loving. He stare at the ceiling as he remembered your face, desperately telling him not to go to her again but he doesn't listen.

Maybe this time it would be different. Maybe this time-

Jieun's phone rang.

She looked at the caller and look at Jungkook before taking the call in her bathroom. Jungkook waited patiently, though his heart felt somewhat strange. After what it feels like eternity, Jieun came out of the bathroom in her bathrobe, fidgeting with the phone in her hand. Jungkook saw the way she bit her lips and her pupil dilated.

"Jungkook, ah.. this might sound uncomfortable.. but.. can you leave? Please? I'm so sorry. Yoongi.. he decided to give me a second chance."

Jungkook smirk loudly. He push the quilt that was covering his naked body and reach for his pants and shirts. He felt like a complete idiot for still wasting his time on her. How could he blew out last night? How could he leave you for.. for this girl he though was his dream.

She was a fucking mistake! A huge fucking mistake!

"Kookie.. I'm really sorry.. I though-"

Jungkook button his shirt, turning to her. "I fucking hate you. You used to be my dream girl noona. I believe everything you said. I even give myself to you. But you're selfish. All you knew was hurting people. Trust me, you and Yoongi hyung? He too wouldn't last with you. Good luck finding your new boy toy once you had a fight with him. Don't fucking contact me for your useless need anymore. We're done," he hissed at her. Jieun's face turned red.

"What the hell?? You think I'm some kind of slut Jungkook? Whoring around like I had nothing to do?? For fuck's sake I'm human too, grow up! You replied to my advance! Yes, it was my mistake to forgo my feelings for a while and slip into the moment, but I love Yoongi! I'm sorry I can't love you like I did him and I'm sorry I promise you a lot of things but seeing how immature you're handling this, I think I made the right decision by choosing Yoongi!" Jieun's words were like venom to his heart.

Jungkook couldn't believe it. A woman with such beautiful face had such vicious heart.

"You're no slut.. you're just the spawn of satan herself. Goodbye noona, thanks for giving me such a valuable lesson in my life," he told her, feeling disgusted with himself. Jieun screamed at him but Jungkook had already left her house and out of her life.

He took out his phone, calling for you, but you it reached your voicemail.

"I'm sorry Y/N. I’m so stupid! I love you. You're the one I wanted. I'm sorry for realizing my stupid feelings for you after a while. I'm sorry, I'm coming darling. I'm coming for you," Jungkook told himself repeatedly, driving to your house in a hurry.

When he reached for your house, it was empty. Your dirty coffee mug wasn't on the table and your house was eerily silent. Jungkook never notice, as he was so busy mopping around his life but then he realize that some of your things are missing. He called you again but each time he did, it only went to the voice mail.

"Where are you Y/N? Please pick up, I know who I'm supposed to love now," he mutters desperately, hoping you would still accept him after what he had done last night.

For 4 hours, Jungkook waited at your living room, thinking you're just out during some errands. He paced back and forth, sitting, then standing, waiting for you to just walk at that front door. Just as he was about to leave, the door to your house click open and Jungkook was about to hug you when he realize it was not you who had opened the door.

"Hana?"

Hana blinked her eyes rapidly. "YOU? What- what are you doing here?"

Jungkook let out a smile. "Oh thank god! I was about to go crazy waiting for Y/N! Is she at the coffee shop? Did she tell you to pick her stuff? I need to see her! Hana I know who I'm supposed to be with now! Y/N! I love her! Gosh! I'm an idiot right?? Gosh, how am I so blind before?"

Hana's eyes were sad and full of dark circles. She gave him a glare and didn't understand what craziness is Jungkook talking about. As your colleague, Hana knew how ignorant Jungkook is, but this is too much. His ignorance is just way past its limit. "You asshole."

Jungkook look at her, "Huh?"

Hana pushed him away.

"You asshole. How can you say all this? How can you proudly say all this after what you did to her? Rot in hell Jungkook! You don't deserve to live. You should be the one who died, not Y/N. Get out of her house, this was only a refugee for you when she's around. She's not anymore. All thanks to you. Bastard!"

Jungkook couldn't catch up with what she's talking about. She's kidding, right?

"Hey Hana.. I know you're mad. I know I am an asshole but don't punish me like this. It's not funny okay. What are you talking about anyways? You're crazy.."

"You don't believe me? Are you looking at what I'm wearing Jeon Jungkook?? I'm here to get some of Y/N's beloved stuff so I can attend her funeral and pay my respect to her families! This is the least I can do! You know whose crazy? You! You're the one whose crazy! For leaving her like that! Fuck you! Get off of me!" Hana yelled at him and pushed him away.

Jungkook's blood runs cold. He reached for Hana's shoulder and turn her around. "STOP JOKING! WHERE IS Y/N?! YOU KNOW WHAT? YOU THINK I DON'T KNOW HER PARENT'S ADDRESS?! I'll go to her house, your stupid prank won't work on me," Jungkook stubbornly pull out his phone where he had your parent's address in his notes.

He scrolled for a while and found it.

Hana rolled her eyes at him disgustedly. "Go, go see for herself with what you've done to Y/N. She loves you Jungkook. She had a whole life ahead of her but she was always busy listening to your stupid problems and mending your broken heart. She was still with you even when you bashed her away for loving someone who keeps on fooling you day in and day out. Did you know why she did that? Because she loves you. With her whole heart. But you.. why did she even waste her time on someone like you, I would never know."

Jungkook couldn't believe his ears. He didn't wait another minute. He ran down the stairs and jump into his car, quickly driving to your parent's house.

...

Jungkook's heart patter once he turn off the engine to his car. He saw a lot of people coming into your house. All of them wearing black. Jungkook's hands trembled.

No, no, Hana can't be serious. He had just met you last night! Maybe.. yes maybe its another person. Maybe someone, a cousin or your family members. Jungkook step out of his car, heart pumping loudly. He walk pass through more and more people who were coming to your house, some of them silently crying, some of them sobbing.

"Y/N, I'm here."

He took a deep breath and step inside your house, where he saw your parents crying at the corner of the room. Your brother was bowing at everyone who came and they were offering their condolences to him and your parents. The house was filled with people wearing black. Jungkook was the only one wearing a white shirt. His bangs covered his doe eyes, his pupil shaking while looking around for any sight of you.

That's when he saw you.

He almost smiled, when he realize how pale you looked like. He almost ran to hug you when he realize how your eyes were closed, sleeping peacefully in the coffin beside your parents. Jungkook fell to the floor. The other guest look at him in surprise.

"No.. no.. Y/N.. no that.. that can't be her.." he mutter to himself, trying hard to convince that the beautiful lifeless girl in the coffin wasn't you. Your brother saw this and excuse himself from the guest, helping Jungkook up from his current state.

"Jungkook," you brother held him by the shoulder. Jungkook's big eyes didn't move from you. "You made it. Thank you, for coming all the way here. I heard that you didn't know about Y/N's passing. We were still in shock too."

Your brother's explanation was not enough. Jungkook trembles, his teeth chattering, "Ho- how hyung? She.. I just saw her last night! Hyung! What happen?! Y/N! She can't leave me like this!"

Your brother calmed him down by making him sit at the furthest corner of the room. "Y/N.. She- she drowned while canoeing. That's what the authority tell us. The boat she took, it- I'm so sorry Jungkook but she's gone, my sister's gone," your brother told him tearfully. Jungkook couldn't believe what he was hearing. Last night, when he left you at the boat.. you didn't go home?

"When they pulled her out of the water.. she looks so pale. As if she's been in there for a long time. The police told me that she wasn't wearing a life jacket, and I know my sister is not a good swimmer, she must have drowned all by herself.."

"NO.. no that can't be- you're joking right?! No- she she can't be!"

Jungkook tried so hard to deny the fact. He couldn't look at how you were lying in the coffin so lifelessly while holding a water hyacinth in your hand. He couldn't accept the fact that it was he who made you died.

He’s a murderer. It was his fault that you've drowned. Your brother tried to calmed him down, but Jungkook ran to your coffin, holding your cold face frantically.

"Y/N? Y/N, darling wake up! You're playing with me right? Where is her glasses?? She can't see without her glasses! Please anyone! Where is her glasses?!"

Your parents cried harder at Jungkook's outburst. Your brother and a few of your cousins pulled him away from you while he screams for them to let him go. "She's gone Jungkook, she's gone-"

"NO! Y/N! NO! Y/N! PLEASE DON'T LEAVE ME! I LOVE YOU Y/N! PLEASE! CALL MY NAME ONE MORE TIME Y/N! PLEASE!"

But it was all too late. You were gone, and Jungkook were in such a great shock that he didn't eat, didn't sleep, didn't talk properly after your death. Even years after your passing, Jungkook was never the same. Nobody knew what’s going on in his mind, because he talks less and thinks about you to the point of madness. He was still in trauma because he knew the last thing you have was a bad memory of him, and how you loved him and still be with him despite everything he did.

He regret that you died because of him, and you died without hearing that he wants to be with you too.

🌸

#bts jungkook angst #BTS jungkook #jeon jungkook #jungkook angst #jungkook jieun angst #jungkook yoongi angst #jungkook iu reader #jungkook x reader #jungkook x you #jungkook x reader x jieun #jungkook cheating angst #jungkook angst oneshot #bts jungkook fanfic #jungkook ff #jungkook sad angst

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dashofmonsters · 2 years

Text

Summary Catalogue pt. 1

This will be an ever growing list of summaries for stories that I have or are working on.

The Long Road: Male Naga (Silas) x F!Reader:

You’re a fisherman’s long time suffering daughter who would rather do anything but get married and settle down like your older sister and brother did. You’ve begged your father to go out and travel but he would like you to settle down. After three years of begging he finally caves in but there’s one condition.

Start Here Status- Season 1 Complete

Stay turned for Season 2 in 2023.

Just Business: Male Drider (Cavan) x F!Reader:

You and Cavan have been friends ever since his family moved into your hometown of Gilli. His family is comprised of master crafters and your father took quick notice of their talents and struck a business deal with them so he’d have exclusive rights to sell their wares through Maher Trade Co.. Over the years as you and Cavan grow, both your families pester you to get into the family business and neither of you are too fond of that idea. You’re both able to avoid talks of business and future with your parents until one day things get out of hand.

Start Here Status- Complete

Masks: 2 Male Fae (Oisín & Darragh) x F!Reader:

Wesdewen village was your home and the only one you ever knew until the plague hit. In order to keep the family safe your father moved everyone away to a town far up north, that is everyone but your dear grandmother. Your family urged her to come with them but she said she needed to stay behind. Years pass and the once plagued village is now recovering. You receive a letter from your grandmother asking you to come down and visit now that it’s safe. With the blessings from your mother and father you venture back to your childhood home. You grandmother is overjoyed to see you and the both of you play catch up for the next few days. After you settle in your grandmother catches a cold and has to rest for several days. She seems nerve wrecked and upset having to be bedridden and when you finally calm her down enough she decides to finally tell you why she had to stay behind.

Start Here Status- Ongoing

5 Wishes: (Singred) Male Orc x F!Reader:

Life in Delglen has been dull and painfully so. Day in and day out you help you family maintain a crumbling and once glorious estate that your ancestors built long ago. Every day you spend fixing or mending, never living and only wishing. One day you're sent out to forge the nearby forest for wild vegetables and herbs while your cousin goes to fish in Lily lake. You're extremely and unusually lucky to find a grand bounty and you don't think much of it until you return the next day.

WIP

Deep in the Dark: Male Orc (Sloan) x F!Reader:

You had been training as a massage therapist for almost five months now. It was a dream job of yours and when you were finally able to afford the class you were over joyed. Time passed and an opportunity to work at the most high end spa in the area came up and you knew you would have to snag it. The salary they're offering is more than generous but that wasn't the only reason you were interested in the position. You send your resume with referrals attached and cross your fingers that you get in.

Start Here Status- Complete

Snowfall: Male Orc (Sloan) x F!Reader:

You and Sloan have been dating for three months now and everything has been great, well aside from the lack of alone time. You've been inducted into his friend group via Rynan's approval and everyone keeps inviting you and Sloan to hang out. You of course don't mind it but you wish to spend more time with just him. Apparently feeling the same he surprises you with a trip to his family's cabin up north. Just you and him and a cozy cabin with no possible problems or intrusions in sight, hopefully.

Start Here Status- On going

Night classes: Male Werewolf (Bernard) x F!Reader:

When you were a kid you loved reading and writing more than anything. As you got older you still did but hardly found the time to between work and helping your older sister with her twins. As time went by the twins finally got old enough for school and your sister met a really nice gal who got her into the local community college. With new found free time you decide to try your hand at writing again but feel rather rusty. Your sister talks you into the creative writing course they have at night and you love it, but there’s just something about the professor that seems oddly familiar…

Start Here Status- On going

Redwood & Wisteria: Male Werewolf (Logan) x F!Reader:

You had two loves in this world, traveling and photography. You were well known thanks to a circle of travel influencers but fame wasn't your cup of tea, in fact it was the reason you stopped leaving the country all together. It's been several months since you've last traveled anywhere and you miss it. You decide to do a trial travel venture and take up residency at a park in a few states over. After some back and forth with the park you strike up a deal on providing new photos for their website in exchange for room and board.

WIP

Cream Tea: Male Werewolf (Thomas) x F!Reader:

It was time for a change and time to get away from mom and dad. Your life had been carefully constructed to a tee down to where you would work and what sort of man you were to marry. This was all you had known until you visited a small town in the next state over. It was quiet and peaceful and everything you wanted and felt deprived of. Back home you did your research on the town and made a secret promise to yourself that one day it would be your home. It's now or never though and with the help of your only friend, you make your move.

WIP

The Lesser of Two Evils: Male Demon (Seth) x F!Reader:

To say that your life keeps taking one bad turn after another would be an understatement. Since the passing of your estranged father last year things have been getting out of hand. He apparently had accumulated a ton of debt and anything that he had went straight to the bank. Unfortunately he also owed quite a bit to some unsavory people who had tracked you and your family down. You set aside your dreams to protect your family from the 'collectors' and enter the world of three jobs and double shifts. After some time you fall into a routine and the collectors ease up on their attitudes. One day during break at the hotel you work for you pull out your old note books and binders and ponder on old dreams...

WIP

Summary Catalogue pt. 2

#dashofmonsters #monster boyfriends #monster boyfriend #fae #orc #werewolf #naga #drider #demon #orc boyfriend #fae boyfriend #werewolf boyfriend #drider boyfriend #monster romance #monster love

428 notes · View notes

christowhore · 3 years

Text

Making You Mine

pairing: chris evans x professor!fem!reader, chris evans x oc!female (brief)

summary: you and chris have your first date.

word count: 3.0k

warnings: !!! 18+ minors dni !!! slight smut, fluff, age gap (reader is 28, chris is 39) suggestive conversation, two dorks in love, alcohol consumption, heavy making out, dry humping, orgasms, rpf

notes: ngl to y’all i didn’t even mean to make it include some smut, but i ended up getting carried away. this is the second part of the ‘Pining for Professor’ series. i hope you all enjoy it and make sure to let me know what you think! *i do not give consent for this fic to be reposted or translated*

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MAIN MASTERLIST • SERIES MASTERLIST

The next few days that passed after your encounter seemed to fly by. You were busy working on your dissertation while Chris was attending ASP interviews.The two of you would text from time to time, just keeping the other updated about your life.

Chris had planned the evening out. Before considering what meal he wanted to make you, he made sure to ask you about any dietary concerns or allergies that you might have, and he was thankful that he did. You informed him that the only food allergy you had was apples. Part of him thought you were joking because he never heard of that being a restriction one could face, but after sending him a photo of one of your allergic reactions, he trashed every single apple he had stored in his fridge. A dramatic reaction, yes, but he wanted to make sure you were both completely safe and comfortable.

He decided on making a simple pasta dinner, something easy that he believed he couldn’t possibly mess up. It wasn’t until he was googling wine pairings when he remembered the woman he was supposed to have this same evening with just a few days ago; Lindsey.

Chris had been so preoccupied with you that he completely forgot about the woman. Looking at his phone and opening their messages, he saw that he had been accidentally ghosting her for the past three days. Not knowing how to deliver the news, he decided it would be best to break things off over the phone than through a text.

Clicking on her contact, he dialed her number and listened to the dial tone ring in his ear. He was pondering on what to say when he heard her voice through the phone. “Hey stranger, I was wondering when you were gonna call me back.”

“Hey Lindsey, sorry I got a little busy with life. Can we talk?”

For about the next five minutes, Chris tried his best to not give the cliche ‘it’s not you, it’s me’ excuse, but in the end he had to explain to the woman how he met somebody else, you, and that he didn’t want to string her along any longer. The call ended with some harsh words from her which he expected. Even though he hated that he hurt her feelings, in the end all he kept thinking about was you.

A couple miles away from his home, you were at your house going through your entire wardrobe trying to find the perfect outfit to wear. Did you want to go the fancy route and wear a nice dress or something casual like jeans and a blouse? Even though Chris told you the plans he had scheduled for your rendezvous, you were still feeling nervous about the whole affair.

Thankfully with the help of your friends, they were able to ease your worries and help you out with your ensemble.

The night before the planned evening, the two of you lay awake, plagued with nerves. Worried about messing up and ruining the chance to be with the other.

With how his morning started the day of his previously planned affair, Chris made sure that nothing could stand in the way of tonight. He had his suit pressed, the ingredients needed for the meal prepped, and a bouquet of red roses bought fresh from the florist resting in a vase of water. Scott went with Dodger over to his sister Shanna’a house, leaving the home to himself.

The day proceeded quickly and soon enough it was time for the date. You agreed to drive over and meet him at his home, arriving there around eight in the evening.

Walking up to the home and knocking on the door, you kept cracking your knuckles, a nervous tick of yours whenever you got anxious. Once the entryway was opened and Chris stepped into your sight, all of those pesky jitters suddenly left your body.

Chris was clad in a tailored black suit that clung to his frame. The white button up he donned was crisp and clean, you could make out a few of his tattoos peeking through the material. Accessorizing his attire, he wore a black and silver watch, the silver in the band matching the Saint Christopher medallion clasped around his neck showing through the opening of his top. His hair was perfectly gelled, making him look fresh out of a photo shoot.

He looked absolutely delectable and part of you didn’t even care about the meal, you just wanted to know how the material of his clothes felt against your skin.

When Chris opened up his door he knew you’d be there, beautiful as ever but he didn’t expect the sight that he was met with.

Your regularly curly hair was straightened, cascading off your shoulders and perfectly framing your face. The makeup you applied made your features light up. He took notice of the lipgloss you put on and all he wanted to do was grab you and taste the substance that was lucky enough to touch your lips.

Looking your body up and down, he noticed your black silk dress, a tie in the middle cinching the material together. The material stopped at your mid thighs revealing your velvety smooth legs and high heeled shoes. Thoughts of him trailing his hands up the sides of your calves while he pinned you below him flashed in his mind. Quickly he shook the image out of his mind to put back all of his attention on you.

“You look absolutely breathtaking,” he whispered in awe.

“You’re not looking too bad yourself.”

As you entered his home, he placed a hand on the small of your back tugging your frame into him so he could place a kiss on your cheek. The same butterflies you experienced when he pecked you that night in the parking lot reappeared by the dozens.

The smell of sautéing onions and garlic filled your senses, instantly making your stomach lurch around. “Whatever it is you're making smells amazing,” you commented to the brunette.

He bashfully smiled, “Thank you, I’m almost finished, though I should let you know I’m not the greatest cook.”

You laughed at his comment, unconsciously placing your palm against his upper arm. “It’s alright Chris, at least you have your looks right?”

It was his turn to laugh, your playful matter had him buzzing.

The two of you made your way through the kitchen, him to the front of the stove while you sat in the high chair behind the counter top. Before he returned to cooking the vegetables, he grabbed the bouquet of red roses he had ordered and handed them to you, a smile instantly appearing on your face.

You thanked him for his generosity and the two of you continued on in lively conversation while he focused back on finishing dinner.

Laughter filled the room while you two chatted in his living room. You two had finished dinner, Chris making a wonderful shrimp scampi that even he was surprised tasted good.

Even though you spent three hours talking that evening in your office, you two didn’t have any difficulty finding new topics to explore.

You spoke about your family and how life was growing up without siblings. How it felt being at an advanced academic level at such a young age, which allowed you the opportunity of being employed at the university at 21. Surprisingly, you allowed yourself to be vulnerable around the man, something that you had never done before. It was something about his demeanor. His presence was inviting and captivating, and all you wanted to do was continue to be around the actor.

Chris was at a loss of words with how to describe how you made him feel. You had such a hypnotizing way to yourself. He would listen to your laugh and drink it in as if it were the last time his ears would be blessed with the sound. Your smile was so genuine, stretching from ear to ear and all he wanted to do was keep that look on your face till the end of his days. He didn’t know he was staring at you until you waved in front of his face, regaining his attention.

“Earth to Evans. Are you okay there?” Your eyebrows were slightly furrowed while you stared intently into his eyes, waiting for his response. He didn’t even think about the next words that came out of his mouth when he spoke.

“I know that we just met last week, and this is only our first date, but would you do me the honor of being able to call you my girlfriend?”

The statement that was rushed out of his mouth had you choke on your glass of wine. Regaining your composure, you set the drink down and looked up at Chris.

There wasn’t any humor in his eyes, just determination as well as a bit of trepidation.

You were about to speak when he started up again. “Usually when meeting someone, I go on about two to three dates with them. Get to know them and go through the ‘what if’s’ possibilities. But with you I realized I can’t wait that long. The only thing I care about is being able to see that smile on your face, and have the melodic sound of your laugh ingrained in my life. And I don’t want to waste another second trying to determine ‘what if’ we’re not a match when I already know that you’re the one for me.”

This time you were the one at a loss of words. Emotions wrangle throughout your body. You were nervous, but the nerves that stood on end were due to the fact of being scared of how quickly you were falling for him.

Without saying anything but donning a beaming grin, you nodded.

Chris immediately leant forward and molded his lips with yours. The kiss was soft and delicate. His right hand slightly cupped your cheek, and in that moment you felt safe, you felt at ease. There was no other place the two of you wanted to be than right there in each other’s embrace.

When you pulled away it felt like time was at a standstill, nothing else mattered but the two of you being together. Even though he wasn’t a photographic person, Chris felt this overwhelming need to document this moment.

He quickly pulled out his phone and asked you if it were okay to take a photo of the two of you, a personal keepsake so to speak. You nuzzled into his side, shoulders touching, breaths fanning across each other’s face. Chris extended his hand with the camera app open and aimed towards the two of you. Though you were looking at the screen, a beaming grin stretched across your features, he was only looking at you. Admiring you as if you were his entire world, which you were slowly but surely becoming. Snapping the photo, he locked his phone and tucked it away back into his slacks.

With the close proximity you two shared, he took advantage of the opportunity to kiss you again. He was desperate to feel you, touch you, taste you. The flavor of your strawberry lip gloss inviting him in.

You melted into him, hands gripping the lapels of his jacket pulling him closer into you. He leaned into your touch, causing the two of you to lay back against his couch.

His hips were slotted in between your legs, crotch rubbing against your warm core. The friction drawing out a low moan from your chest.

He continued to feverishly attack your mouth. This kiss was different from the first. This was pure hunger. You two were desperate to feel the other. His tongue slotted into your mouth, tasting the leftover remnants of the Pinot Grigio you consumed. Notes of grapes and honeysuckles on your tongue made him push deeper. The intoxicating taste and the effects of the alcohol had him unconsciously grinding into you, rubbing his cock against your covered mound.

You ran your hands across the expanse of his body. Rubbing his arms, slightly gripping his ass, tangling your hands into the brown tuffs of his hair, you couldn’t get enough. He felt amazing against you. The rubbing of his hips were drawing out moans that you didn’t even try to suppress due to the unwavering desire you felt towards him. You felt him lift your leg up, giving himself more room to rut against you. The movement caused your dress to hike up, showing the lace of your black thong to your now boyfriend.

The two of you continued with your actions. Tongue slapping against each other as you sloppily tasted the other. The movements of his hips against your cunt accelerated to a rigorous pace when he felt a wet patch growing on your panties.

You felt like honey teenagers, dry humping each other like a pair of desperate virgins, but in that moment it was perfect.

Drawing away from each other, Chris nestled his face in the crook of your neck, his warm breath sending shockwaves of arousal straight to your core.

You were both close to reaching your respective peak, your moans were getting wilder and his hips were becoming unruly.

It only took a few more bumps of his crotch against your covered clit for you to gush in your panties. An erotic moan left your lips and filled the room while your back arched, pushing your breasts against his chest.

Hearing the near pornographic sound that left your body, while feeling your peer nipples press against his front allowed him to reach his release as well. Biting down against the column of your neck, he came in his pants, filling his boxer briefs with his seed.

Chris collapsed on top of your panting body, the two of you trying to regain a steady breath. He lay there in your arms, your nails dragging along the nape of his neck.

When he finally regained composure, Chris raised up on his palms and looked down at you. And as if your minds were synced up, you both erupted in a fit of giggles.

After coming down for your laugh attacks, you excused yourself to the bathroom to freshen up.

You stood in front of the mirror, examining your reflection. There was still some adrenaline flowing through your bloodstream causing your hands to slightly shake. Your lips were red and swollen due to the attack on them moments prior. But what you couldn’t ignore was the dopey smile that seemed to take permanent residence on your face. You felt like a giddy schoolgirl, though you weren’t complaining.

Your recently ended relationship with your ex Justin was not great. The reason for the break up was due to the fact that he didn’t make you feel special. Looking back at it now you don’t even know why you agreed to start dating him in the first place. But you were thankful it concluded, otherwise you wouldn’t be here, with a man who looked at you like you hung the moon and placed every star in the sky yourself.

Back in the living room, Chris paced around the living room for your return. Happiness surged through him, making him pump his fist in the air like he was John Bender in The Breakfast Club.

He's been with plenty of women throughout his life, even getting engaged to one, but it was in this moment he realized he had never been so infatuated with someone until you entered his life. You made all of the hairs on his body stand up just by looking at him. It elated him but also scared him. It scared him due to how fast he was falling for you. But he didn’t care. Though this feeling was foreign, he had no problem welcoming it with open arms.

After a few moments consisting of composing yourself, you made your way out of the bathroom and back to Chris. You two stood there, just smiling at each other like idiots. It was him who finally piped up.

“So that was some first date.”

You couldn’t help but chuckle at his comment.

“Tell me about it,” you replied.

The two of you conversed some more before it got late and you decided to call it a night. Making sure you had all of your belongings, including your roses, he escorted you to your car.

Resting against the door, you couldn’t resist temptation so you pulled him into you, attaching your lips to his once more. This kiss wasn’t the apprehensive one you first shared, or the hungry and desperate one that came after. This kiss was full of passion. It was the type that made you breathe out a sigh of relief into the other's mouth, glad that your bodies were in union in such an intimate manner. Neither of you wanting it to end.

When you finally pulled apart, Chris rested his forehead against your own, trying to savor the moment a while longer.

“I’ll call you when I get home, alright?”

Repeating the actions yet again of your first meeting, he went to open your door, waiting for you to slide in before shutting in. After turning on the engine, you rolled the window down allowing Chris to rest against the frame on his forearms.

“See you later, girlfriend.”

“Right back at you, boyfriend.”

Giving you a fleeting kiss goodbye, he stood up and watched as you pulled out of his driveway and back to your home.

Chris stood there in his driveway for a while. He thought about how the date went twenty times better than any other one he’d ever been on. How you made him feel like the greatest man in the world. The way your lips met his and how it was like they were made to be caressed by his. The smile that crept on your face when he called you his girlfriend. And he thought about how now nothing else in this world mattered except for keeping you in his life and making sure that wonderful smile never left your features.

A/N: so the song True by Spandau Ballet is the song i envisioned when Chris opened the door. it’s that one slow 80s song they play in movies where it’s goes like ‘ah ah ah ahhh ahh’ it's all romantic and what not, y’all know the song i’m talking about, that one. cheesy i know, but i works.

anyway baby, i know there’s not a lot of dialogue, i’ve come to the realization that it’s one of my weakness but i’ll be working on it.

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* dividers credit: @firefly-graphics *

#chris evans #chris evans series #chris evans fanfiction #chris evans smut #chris evans one shot #chris evans fluff #chris evans x fem!reader #chris evans rpf #chris evans x reader #chris evans angst #pining for professor

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thebadboyfanclub · 4 years

Text

You Are Family Now (Sherlock x Reader)

So I had to repost this, @elanna-elrondiel was the one that requested it and i’m so happy they did, I feel like since I had to post it once again I should name you for this brilliant idea. Enjoy!

“Mister Holmes may I introduce you to my niece, miss (y/f/n)”

A young woman smiled at him as she extended her arm for him to take, her hands were covered but a pair of silk black gloves and her white dress complimented her complexion perfectly. Sherlock took her hand and gave a gentle kiss, before looking straight into her eyes, however she could swear that he looked in her soul.

“Sherlock Holmes, Charmed”

“Likewise, what brings you to my dear uncles event? I don’t recall being in your presence before”

“Destiny I hope, only that could explain being around such an ethereal woman”

After that fatal meeting Sherlock had pursued her, he was astonished by her kind heart and lively spirits, she looked at the world in rose colored glasses and her curiosity about everything was so heart warming to him, it was also a reminder that not everything has to be a mystery and sometimes you need a little sugar in your coffee.

“Happy birthday beloved”

“Oh Sherlock, you spoil me way to much”

“As I am expected to do, especially since it’s your first birthday we spend together”

Sherlock had asked he to spend the night in his home, after their engagement a few days ago she was free of the judgmental eye of the public and could do whatever she wanted with her fiancé in public or not. Sherlock touched the button of her nose with the red rose he had brought with the breakfast, he could not believe how fast he had fallen for her, she was needed in his life, she grounded him, she was the sensitive happy little tune in his head that brought a smile on his face.

“Happy birthday dear”

“Thank you honey”

He leaned in to give her a gentle kiss that made her smile in between the quick little pecks that moved from her lips to her entire face. She started giggling at the matter and tried to push him away.

“Sherlock the food tray”

He swiftly placed it on the floor and dove under the covers yet still on top of her. She kissed him back as her hands held on the material of his shirt on the side of his torso. She loved how smitten he was behind closed doors, how his hands felt almost like feathers by how gentle he was with her, as he pulled back and looked at her, her right hand traveled to his hair, combing through his curls with the feeling of it making her smile once again.

“How did I get so lucky?”

“I don’t know, I guess my uncle hosts great events”

The scene was interrupted by a ring of his doorbell. He wasn’t expecting anyone, he had made sure to not be disturbed today, it was all about her today so a sudden visit was the last thing he needed.

“Maybe it’s your brother”

She spoke, sensing his irritation and questioning the rude visitor. He looked back to her and gave her a kiss once again, dreading the fact that he had to go and open the door.

“Whoever it is, they are getting a brief excuse as for why they can’t come in. I’ll be back in a minute darling”

He put on his robe and to cover his pajamas and left her with her breakfast. (Y/n) didn’t mind it, her stomach was very excited about the delicious treats she was offered by her love, the smell of the pastries and the orange juice definitely made up for the few moments he had to be away from her.

As Sherlock opened the door he was met with the very last person he expected it to be.

“Mother?”

“Oh Sherlock, it’s so nice to see you”

Eudoria didn’t miss a beat nor took into consideration her sons wide eyes and shocked demeanor, she hugged him tightly as a way to show how much she had missed him, even thought she valued her kids independency, they were still her children.

“I wasn’t expecting you to visit”

“Oh dear how could I not? As soon as I got your letter informing me of your engagement I had to come and meet the girl that will be a part of our family, you have a lovely home by the way”

She said as she looked around. It was the first time that Sherlock didn’t know what to do exactly, his mother was in the same home with his fiancé that has no clue of what is going on.

“Is she here? Of course she is, you were never fond of high heels”

She let out a small giggle as her gaze found the shoes that were placed right next to his from last night. Sherlock quickly regained his cool and smiled at his mother.

“It’s her birthday today”

“Oh good, go get her for me please. I’ll wait in the living room for you two”

Without even waiting for a positive or negative response, she walked away from the hall and onto the living room. Sherlock huffed as he walked up the stairs, he had no doubt that his mother would adore (y/n), however (y/n) always became nervous whenever the topic of meeting his family was brought up. As opened the door of his room, there she was eating the breakfast he had made for her, she looked up at him with her mouth full, it was such a sight to see her do anything, she truly looked like a princess.

“Who was it?”

“My...mother”

Silence. As (y/n) waited for him to laugh or show any hint of this being a silly joke of his to tease her, as she waited the chances of it being a joke became thinner and her heart started to beat faster by the second.

“What?”

“I wrote to her about our engagement, she came to see you”

“no, no, no this can’t be”

“Darling, calm yourself”

He approached her, his hands taking hers. Of course she wanted to meet his family, she always tried to get some stories of them out of him, his mother sounded like a very interesting and excellent lady. Yet, this wasn’t the way she wanted to meet her, wearing the dress she wore last night, her hair is a mess and she didn’t have a stitch of make up, she couldn’t meet her in this state.

“Sherlock I can’t meet her, i’m not prepared”

“Dear she will love you no matter what, come on let me help you with your corset”

Sherlock took the tray and placed it at the table a few steps away from his bed. He was expecting her to be on her feet when he turned around, to his surprise she was still in bed, looking utterly mortified.

“(Y/n) come on now, she is waiting”

“What if you tell her i’m sick?”

“Dear, she is not stupid and she traveled all the way here just to see you, wouldn’t it be rude if you didn’t come down to meet her?

“I suppose so”

“Let’s get you ready”

(Y/n) let her feat touched the ground and slowly collected her dress. She stood still as Sherlock started tying her corset, he was.... used to assisting her tying it back up.

“What if... she thinks I’m not enough for you? What if she advised you not to marry me?”

“Then I guess we have once less invitation on our wedding”

“Don’t be ridiculous Sherlock, we can’t marry without your mothers blessing”

“And we won’t have to, you are a remarkable young lady that I am blessed to have in my life, I am sure my mother will think the same”

with one final tie, her corset was ready. Sherlock placed a light kiss on her shoulder and span her around to look at those eyes of hers. His arms wrapped slowly around her waist, bringing her closer to him.

“I will give you a few minutes to get ready, I will be right next to you through the whole thing alright?”

“Fine. I’ll be down in a minute”

He left her get prepared and for one last time went back down to his mother was had sat down in one of the chairs next to the window. The light of the sun brought warmth in the room and showed off the furniture that he had chosen.

“She is quite nervous to see you mother”

“Oh nonsense, I’m not some stuck up mother that thinks no one is enough for my son.”

“She just really wants to make a good impression, she always asks about you”

He sat in the couch close by her, patiently waiting for lovely little (y/n). Not even a minute went by before she appeared, her her up and away from her face and a nervous smile on her lips, she walked to Eudoria and bowed to an extent that made Sherlock think she touched the ground.

“Miss Holmes, it’s an honor to meet you”

“The pleasure is all mine dear. Let me look at you”

(Y/n) straighten her posture and smiled even brighter at the woman. Eudoria took in her sons fiancé before smiling herself.

“Oh my, you are a true beauty dear. My son is a very lucky man”

“I think I am lucky to have him in my life, you raised a very noble man miss Holmes”

“He is alright, but you... I see why he chose you”

Sherlock decided it was a good time to join the two women. He stood next to (Y/n) and took her hand in his, giving it a light squeeze just to let her know he was there for her. He looked over at his pleased more that was still staring at (y/n)

“She is even more wonderful once you get to know her mother”

“I have no doubt about that. What is your name love?”

“(Y/f/n)”

“A beautiful name for a beautiful lady. My so told me it is your birthday today”

“Yes miss Holmes it is my birthday”

“Oh please call me Eudoria, you are family now aren’t you”

(Y/n) almost collapse to the floor. Joy took over her and it was shown by how red her cheeks had gotten, with shaking knees she held herself and nodded at the request Eudoria had made.

“We must celebrate then, Sherlock I’m sure you can make a reservation to a nice restaurant for dinner”

“Of course, if (y/n) wishes to do so”

“I would love to have dinner with your mother”

“Excellent, now I have reserved a room for me in the Lenox hotel, I’ll give you two some privacy now”

“Allow me to walk you out mother”

Before she stepped out of the room, Eudoria opened her arms and hugged the young girl. (Y/n) restrained herself from fainting and hugged her back, the nervous smile was replaced by a big happy smile that reached her ears.

“Welcome to the family (y/n)”

“Thank you miss- I mean Eudoria”

Eudoria giggled at the flustered (y/n) and walked away accompanied by her son. As they reached the door she turned to her son who was also smiling, of course he was sure that they would get along but it was even better now that it actually happened.

“She is a lovely girl Sherlock”

“I know mother, she is perfect”

“Now Sherlock, marriage is not an easy thing so please don’t make me come here and beat you with a stick, cause I will if I find out you are being a bad husband”

“Mother if I recall correctly marriage is between two people, not just one”

“Oh please Sherlock, the girl almost passed out when she saw me, I saw how she relaxed when you took her hand, she loves you”

“And I do as well”

It was true, Sherlock loved and adored (y/n), she was his one and only. Eudoria hugged her son once last time and walked out of the house. As Sherlock was returning to the living room, he heard quick footsteps coming towards him and in a blink of an eye (y/n) had ran to him and hugged him tightly, making him take a few steps back by the force of hers

“Well now, someone’s excited”

“She called me family”

“You are family (y/n), I told you she would like you”

“Yes you did but.... she did as well”

Sherlock could only giggle at her cute outburst of excitement. (Y/n) had a lot of friends and family members that were already married or engaged so she had heard the mother in law horror stories, she was delighted that Sherlocks mother was not one of them.

“We must find an excellent restaurant for tonight”

“Yes, before that”

A squeal was heard that had escaped (y/n) as Sherlock swiped her off her feet and took her in his arms bridal style. Another kiss was given to her that she responded almost immediately this time.

“I have to give you one of your birthday presents”

“One?”

“Of course, one for your personal pleasure and another to flaunt to those rude little “friends” of yours”

“They are better than your brother”

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honeybunnybeez · 3 years

Note

If you want to you could write some C! Dream being soft around reader?

Secluded Cabin's and Gentle Touches

♡Pairing: Dream x GN!Reader (with hints of platonic!GN!reader x Tommy and Tubbo)

♡Genre: Fluff

♡Format: Fanfiction

♡Summary: It's not uncommon for Tommy and Tubbo to bring people over to your place so you can help calm them down after a prank, but today they seemed to drag by a familiar face that you have yet to properly spend time with. Lucky for you, he seems to be longing to talk to you as well.

♡Au Setting: Au where the war never happens but tensions are still high.

"Get back here!"

Despite the voice ordering them to stop, Tommy and Tubbo continued to run like their lives depended on it, and to be fair, it kinda did in this situation. Wet hands stained in different coloured dyes served as proof of their crimes and a green hooded man wearing an awfully smudged looking mask makes it clear who their latest prank victim was.

"What were we fucking thinking!?" but a laugh at the end of his yelling as he dodges Dream's outstretched hand makes it clear that Tommy doesn't regret his life choices at all.

"I don't know!" Tubbo on the otherhand, was starting to regret his involvement in the prank. His legs were starting to ache and his chest began to burn as he slowly became exhausted. A wild chase like this isn't exactly new to them but Dream's persistence really makes it hard for a person to catch a breather between runs. "Tommy, where are we even going!?"

Tommy opened his mouth to respond but a trail of scattered lanterns and torches answers Tubbo's question for him. Tubbo lets out a knowing, "ooooh!" And uses whatever remaining energy he can to keep up with Tommy, knowing exactly what his friend had in mind.

In the distance, they can see you sitting on your porch, playing with a parrot you had managed to tame while out searching for cocoa beans. Relief washes over them when you lock eyes with them and start jogging over with your bird in tow, a worried expression evident on your face.

They're quick to hide behind you when they get close enough, clutching the back of your shirt while trying to catch their breaths to answer your questions as to who they were running from this time and why.

"Dream-" is all Tommy can manage to wheeze out before he's coughing up a lung and swearing again.

"Ah," honestly, after knowing the pair for a good few years now, just mentioning a name gives you a pretty good idea of the type of prank they pulled and the danger they could be in. Thankfully, Dream wasn't a major threat, to you at least.

"Alright, alright, go hide in the house quickly and don't come out until I tell you guys to. If I die, make sure to take care of the farm animals and bees for me."

"Bless you, (y/n)."

"Your sacrifices won't be in vain, we promise!"

You give them a joking salute and urge them to go inside quickly, informing them that you can hear Dream approaching closer. Once the boys were safely inside, you tried your best to look as natural as possible with the limited time you had to adjust yourself. When Dream arrives, you can see that he's just as tired as the boys are thanks to the chase, though his stance continues to be tense as he frantically looks around for them, fists clenched tight until his knuckles turned ghost white.

"Fuck, where did they run off to?"

"Not gonna give a stranger a kind hello after walking onto their lawn with murderous intent?" You and Dream weren't really strangers per say, you had to meet up with him when you moved into the server after all, but due to conflicting schedules and how often Tommy and Tubbo dragged you away whenever he tried to make conversation, you two didn't know each other all that well. That doesn't mean that you didn't want to try though.

When Dream realizes where he was and who he was talking, he's quick to adjust his mask and hoodie to make himself look somewhat... presentable, as presentable as he can look with sweat marks and a messed up mask at least.

'Why did those two have to run up to your house out of all places,' Dream mentally whines to himself, clearing his throat and giving you a single awkward wave as he walks up to you.

"Hey, (y/n). I didn't know you lived in this part of the server," that was a lie. Dream did know where you live, he knew where everyone did but it would be a little creepy to just put that information out there, wouldn't it?

"It'd be a little weird if I just started screaming out my address to random people on the streets, wouldn't it?" You try to joke, earning a little laugh from Dream.

"Okay, yeah, you got me there."

You pat an empty spot beside you on your porch step, inviting Dream over for a bit of rest and he accepts your offer gratefully, practically slumping beside you as he suddenly feels just how tired he is.

"Love the new look you gave your mask by the way," Dream groans at your teasing and pulls at his hoodie strings, hoping to cover his whole mask with his hood. He's glad you can't see his face right now because he can feel his cheeks practically burning at the fact that when he finally gets a chance to talk and get close to you it's when he's a sweating tired mess who looks like a wreck at best.

"I'm going to kill those two when I find them," he mumbles under his breath.

The slam that follows within your home could not have been more terribly timed.

"What was that?"

"Must be my wolves," you lied through your teeth, knowing damn well that your actual wolves were sleeping in your bedroom, "they learned how to open doors recently, I think they're messing around at the moment."

While he's distracted, staring at your window to check what's going on inside of your home, you're quick to read through your most recent private messages on your communicator.

Tommy: HE'S HERE!

Tommy: (Y/N), WHY AREN'T YOU TELLING HIM TO FUCK OFF!?

Tommy: Fuck this, we're hiding in the kitchen.

Tubbo: We're making a run for it through the back.

Tommy: We'll hide in your barn like runaway children.

Tubbo: Isn't that what we technically are right now?

Tommy: (y/n), we're making a fucking run for it if you don't answer us in 3 seconds.

Tommy: 3!

Tommy: 2!

Tubbo: We'RE OUT! I REPEAT, WE'RE OUT!

"Yup," you pop your P a little at the end, annoyed yet amused at the string of frantic messages still continuing to pop up on your communicator as they make their escape, "definitely my wolves causing all of that chaos."

Dream knows that you're lying from the way you read through your messages but he doesn't say a word about it, choosing instead to take this golden opportunity to get closer to you without worrying about anyone getting in the way.

"Not really how you thought the day would go, huh?"

You can't help but laugh and shake your head, "Not at all, I thought it was just going to be another boring day with my bird, but hey, I'm glad you showed up to make it a little more special."

"Really?" Dream hates how happy he sounds to hear you say that, but he'll beat himself up over it another time.

"It's not everyday you see Mr. WasTaken himself visiting your humble home, now is it?" Oh, or maybe he won't.

"I guess not, that really should change, shouldn't it?" You can hear the little grin in his voice as he realizes the game your playing.

"It really should, but a quick heads up would be good, unless you'd like to deal with said 'wolves' I mentioned earlier."

He chuckles and shakes his head, mentioning how he's more than aware that those two 'wolves' of yours would probably rip him apart if he ever visited you unannounced.

It isn't long before you invite Dream inside, offering to help clean his mask as an apology on the boys's behalf. He claims that he doesn't mind but he would rather not take his mask off in front of you when he hasn't gotten to know you all that well.

"You don't have to remove it if you feel uncomfortable, I'll just wipe away whatever I can with a cloth, but if you're still hesitant, I'd understand."

He takes a moment to consider your offer, trying to see if you have any other ulterior motives. It's not that he doesn't want to trust you, he does, but sometimes you just have to be a little extra cautious even with people you like. Sensing no ill intent on your part though, he relaxes himself once more and accepts your help, letting his hood finally loosen and fall back to ease your process.

Your actions are incredibly comforting to Dream who can't help himself from leaning into your touches every once in a while. He watches you with his fullest attention as you wipe away the mess on his mask with a damp cloth. He loves how focused you look while doing so, taking in every little quirk you may have while you concentrate. His little crush on you that he's harboured ever since he saw you running around the server can't help but grow every second you give him your attention.

There's a certain draw to you that Dream can't fight off no matter how hard he tries, you just manage to hold a certain power over him and that was evident by the fact that he completely lost interest in continuing his hunt for Tommy and Tubbo even after finding out that they were still most likely on your property. Dream was a persistent man, he was never one to simply drop something with no proper reason at all. There was just this appeal to you that he couldn't describe and he was desperate to find out what it was about you that made him act differently than he normally would.

"Okay then, that's the last of it," he has to stop himself from letting out a whine when you pull your hands away from his mask, he wants to say something to try to get you to continue on longer but decides against it, not wanting to seem desperate. His eyes don't leave you even after you pull away, watching you rinse off the dirty cloth before throwing it into what seemed to be a bin filled with laundry. When you return to sit by his side, he can't help but swallow a bit of his pride to rest his head on your shoulder. It's a big risk to take, but at least he has an excuse for his actions if he ever needs it.

"Tired, Dream?"

"Mhmm," he feels himself melt when you let your fingers run through his slightly sweat damp hair, clearly unphased by the state of it much, to his joy.

"You wanna rest here for a while? I'm sure you could get a good nap in before leaving."

"That depends, can I still use you as my pillow?"

"Not like I have anything else to do for the rest of the day, knock yourself out."

"Then if you'll excuse me," his head is quick to leave your shoulder to instead rest in your lap and the blissful sigh he lets out escapes his lips before he can even stop himself. You just feel so comfortable to him. "I'm gonna drift off, wake me up in an hour or so, will you?"

You let out a hum in response and it isn't long before you start to see Dream's body go slack, his breathing now steady and deep as he slowly falls asleep. It's quite endearing seeing Dream act so affectionately towards you, something you certainly didn't expect from a guy who carries himself with a subtle wave of authority, but you definitely weren't complaining as you continued to play with his hair once again.

Dream would never tell a single soul about it, but this was quiet possible the best sleep he's gotten in years, if he even tried to sleep at all to begin with. The thought to just slow down and relax is never really on his mind, his head always spinning with things he has to do. However, with you, he's glad to know that he can look to you for comfort from now on, something he now realizes is rather hard to find on the server. It pains him to know that he'll have to leave in just a few moments but for now, he'll take what he can get from you and maybe, if you let him, he'll be sure to return your sweet gestures tenfold one day.

A/N: Hello, everyone! I am so sorry for being absent recently, I know the writer's block excuse can only go so far but- yeah ^^' I'm so sorry again for everything and I'm sorry if this isn't what you were hoping for anon! Thank you so much for the rquest and feel free to request it again if you want me to remake this to hopefully suit what you wanted. Anyways, I hope you all have a good day and thank you so much for reading!

(Requests are open and anon is on!)

#mcyt x reader #mcyt imagine #dream smp x reader #dream smp imagine #dream x reader

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spacedikut · 3 years

Text

the very insecure dr reid ; spencer reid

pairing: spencer reid x gn!reader

summary: “Could you write another fic about early Spence where he’s all insecure” combined with another request :) 5730 words

a/n: title taken from s1e5!! i wrote this months ago aka before i decided to try to make my fics gender neutral and i tried to make the appropriate changes but im also a dumbass so! yeah!

masterlist

Spencer is a man of science, if you didn’t already know.

This means he doesn’t spend his time fretting over what isn’t there, what doesn’t have facts and evidence to back it up. Of course, he dabbles in reading conspiracy theories and enjoys learning about various religions and things of that sort, but these are to expand his already infinite knowledge, not because he particularly believes in them.

The first time he believed there was some kind of God was when you kissed him.

It was after the case where both Elle and Spencer were trapped on a train with a paranoid schizophrenic – he still remembers how you reacted when he agreed to being sent in, how you tried to keep it light-hearted but pulled him aside to solemnly tell him you didn’t think you’d be able to live without him (if you do something rash and stupid, Spencer, I swear to God-). You threatened to nipple cripple him if he did die, and it was weirdly motivating.

After he was checked over, and teased Elle about saving her life, you came crashing into him with an audible oof and a whisper of, “God you smell so good I’m so glad you’re okay don’t ever do that again.” It was probably the adrenaline, the near-death experience high, but instead of gently pushing you away like he’d do with anyone else, he discovers your waist has a wonderful dip that his arms fit perfectly into as he tugs you close.

He’s hugged people before, obviously, but it’s always different with you.

You must think so, too, because when you pull away just enough that you’re still in his arms but can clearly see his face, you take a minuscule intake of breath that Spencer wouldn’t notice if he wasn’t, you know, Spencer.

A strand of Spencer’s hair falls from where it was tucked, falling into his line of sight. Without hesitation you’re pushing it back, fingertips brushing against Spencer’s cheek as you fold the hair back behind his ear. Your eyes meet when there’s no obstruction, electricity crackling in Spencer’s ears when he realises there’s nothing between you, nothing stopping you, and there’s something about the lack of space between you and how he holds you that just makes you ask-

“Would it be weird if I kissed you right now?”

Immediately, Spencer thinks yes. Not because he doesn’t want you to (he couldn’t think of anything better to do, to be honest), or because of where you are (although, knowing the whole team is not far away does make him feel a little funny), it’s because he’s him. Gangly, awkward, with very sweaty hands that feel at home on your body, and you don’t want to kiss that. You can’t want to.

Yet, he shakes his head, and finds himself copying you when you lean in and close your eyes.

It’s short, sweet, and somewhat weird. He thinks he blacks out, loses himself in your lips despite it happening so quickly.

When you pull back, Spencer’s eyes remain closed for a good few seconds before he’s brought back to Earth. And he doesn’t know what to say - pretty people don’t just… kiss him. They certainly don’t ask if they can kiss him, then follow through, and… stare at him like that.

“Has anyone seen Reid? Y/L/N?”

Whatever was supposed to happen after, whether it was good or bad, you’ll never know. Hotch’s footsteps are thundering towards you and, despite your daze, you step away from Spencer just as he spots you.

The second time he believed there was a God, he asked you on a date. And you said yes.

Neither of you mention the kiss. In your defence, he supposes, it happened merely an hour ago – everyone’s rushing to get back to Quantico so no one’s had time to make any kind of small talk, let alone have the talk after a kiss.

Elle gives Spencer a look of confusion when she slides past him, moving into the jet as he hovers in the entryway. He’s obviously waiting for someone, passing out tight lipped smiles to the team when they all squeeze past. Spencer isn’t a big guy, but it’s bizarre for him to be standing there like that, swaying like the palm tree he is – he’s usually setting up for yet another game of chess with Gideon at this moment.

Then you shuffle on, faltering when you catch him waiting for you but smile nonetheless. He straightens, hands remaining in his pockets when his mouth opens to speak. You interrupt him (before he can make a fool of himself, thank God).

“Wanna sit together?” You ask, eyes never leaving his. He nods and follows you like the lost puppy he is.

The second you invite him to sit next to you instead of opposite he wants to pull you tight into his side, but that seems like too much. He’s not Derek, for Heaven’s sake, and you’re not Garcia – all you’ve done is kiss once and really, when he thinks about it, you were probably on an adrenaline high too, so it might’ve been a heat of the moment thing. It happens, Spencer’s read about it, and although it would break his heart that it meant nothing, it’s likely. Oh, it’s so likely.

Spencer might be the first one on the team to cry on the BAU jet.

Halfway home, the team is lost in their own pass-times to notice when you bookmark your page and place your book on the table.

“Spence,” You whisper, testing if he’s awake.

He is. He hasn’t been able to catch a wink of sleep, no matter how hard he tries. “Yeah?”

“I’m sorry if what I did earlier- you know-“ You gesture vaguely in the air, completely oblivious to the fact Spencer is very familiar with what happened earlier because he can’t stop replaying it, “-If that made you uncomfortable. Or if I forced you, or-“

“Would it be weird if I asked you on a date when we land?”

The grin you send him shoots straight to his heart, eyes crinkling with laughter at his echo of the words you used earlier. If you notice you don’t mention it, but his hands can’t stop fidgeting under the table, slick with sweat.

“It’d only be weird if you don’t kiss me after.” You say.

His brows furrow, a small incredulous laugh leaving him. “What? Why?”

“We’ve already had our first kiss, so it’s out of the way.”

“Are you saying… You want to kiss me again?”

You thought that was obvious from when you kissed him earlier, but you’re happy to remind him. “Yes. I would like that very much.”

“Okay,” He says, bashfully, with a lick of his lips. “I can- I can arrange that.”

This time, when you turn back to your book, your head finds his shoulder and Spencer thinks his it has turned to gold, blessed by being touched by you. Would it be too much if, the second you get back to base, he writes about this moment in great detail to his mother?

+++

All of that leads to now, where The Date is in three days.

He plans to take you to his favourite book café, a place you’ve always wanted to go but never had the chance to, and he was so, so excited. Any time he gets to spend with you is cherished and means more to him than it does to you, because to him it’s an excuse for you to give him more reasons to fall in love with you. And he does - fall in love - every single day.

Was is the important word here. He’s not excited anymore.

It’s terrifying how quick the tides can change.

Just this morning, he was glancing with child-like excitement at the outfit he’s already chosen for the date. You brought him some coffee, whispering an endearing, “Three days!” as you did, and, according to Derek, Spencer’s love eyes (what the hell does that mean) were so big even Derek fell in love with you for a second.

Now, Spencer’s not territorial, but that comment stuck with him. Maybe that’s why he’s here now.

He has to cancel the date.

It pains him – God, does it pain him – but he has to. He can’t go on that date with you. He can’t… put you through that. Make you spend time with him and have to let him down gently, slowly, like you’re talking down a temper tantrum. He can’t then pretend everything’s okay in front of the team. He won’t be able to pretend, because he’s liked you for months.

He won’t force you to go on that date with him. You deserve better than that, and better than him.

That’s what it comes down to: you deserve better than him.

It started that morning with Derek, as previously mentioned. Then the team was whisked away on a case, and the detectives were all over you. JJ, too, but they were too intimidated by Elle and Morgan, who just laughed at their attempts to impress you. It was borderline inappropriate, but you were too concerned with the victims and finding a serial killer to pay some officers and detectives you’ll never see again any attention.

Spencer noticed, though. And he couldn’t concentrate.

The detectives are dressed too well – by that, he means the suits and the Rolex watches are way above their paygrade – and they keep emphasising how good looking you and JJ are and how lucky the BAU is to have such dolls working on the team. What is this, the 40s? Who calls anyone doll anymore? And, yes, the team is very lucky to have you and JJ, but because you’re both great minds and wildly intelligent people that, yes, are also very gorgeous, but your looks aren’t all you have to offer, thank you very much.

There’s a detective approaching you, again, as you stand by the water cooler.

Spencer frantically looks around, trying to find a member of the team. “Morgan!” He weakly calls, because Spencer won’t scare him off. Maybe Morgan can chase them away like they’re stray cats, with his big muscles and scary eyebrows. Or Elle, who earlier merely lifted an eyebrow and the officers scattered like cockroaches.

All he catches of the conversation between you and the model/detective at the cooler is, “I appreciate it, but no thank you,” and that’s all he needs to hear.

He should’ve known someone would eventually make a move. You’ve said no, clearly, and Spencer doesn’t understand why. I mean, yes, he knows why – you have a prior engagement – but the detective… As much as he’s kind of a dick, he complements you better than Spencer does. Physically.

And there starts the spiral.

There must be something in the water, because every officer and detective and everyone in between is in peak physical condition with dashing looks to boot. They’re all straight out of a magazine, as if the popular kids from Spencer’s high school graduated and followed him here to remind him he is incredibly unworthy of you.

Spencer is lanky, unlike the broad men and curvaceous women here, and slicks his hair to the side rather than up like the others. He wears sweater vests, not blazers, and he’s so skinny that his trousers always look like hand-me-downs – nothing is fitted, like so many outfits are here.

They’re all everything Spencer is not. And Spencer is realising, quite quickly, that they’re the better ones – and that’s what you deserve. Better. The best.

It gets worse when they deliver the profile.

He finds his spot next to you, gives you a tight lipped smile, then looks at the outfits of his team compared to his own. Both Hotch and Morgan wear dark suits, well-proportioned and sophisticated in a way that Spencer is sure isn’t even in his calibre. Elle wears a deep green t-shirt, tucked into her tight black pants, and looks wonderfully intimidating with her double gun holster wrapped around her shoulders.

And you. You.

You wear a white shirt tucked into nicely tailored trousers, hair effortlessly styled with a pen tucked behind your ear. You all look like FBI agents. Intimidating. Prepared. Put-together.

Spencer… looks like he’s still in high school. He threatens no one, intimidates no one, and definitely does not make anyone feel inferior with his masculinity. He’s not an alpha male, is what he’s trying to say, and for each person he encounters in this wretched police department he feels himself shrinking.

So when they give the profile, he tries to say as little as possible. Tries to attract as little attention as possible, so when Hotch says his usual, “Thank you.” He can slip away unnoticed and hide from the superior beings.

It works, given everyone is too busy trying to save lives. Except you notice, and Spencer has to pretend he’s okay when you find him at the evidence board and tell him you’re excited for the date. He wants to believe you, truly does, but no matter how hard he digs into his brain to find a part of him that can fathom you see him as a better option than literally anyone else, it doesn’t exist.

You don’t seem to notice. He tells himself he’s glad, but there’s no denying the disappointment.

+++

Hotch calls it a night when the clock nears midnight. He says the team should get as much rest as possible and come in with fresh eyes tomorrow – despite this, the team knows most if not all of them will get little to no sleep, given that they’ll all be going over everything they’ve got so far in their hotel rooms.

You slink up to Spencer, a pep in your step even though you’re running on pure caffeine and nothing else. It’s then Spencer realises he has to do it now, because if he does it in the police department then he’ll be called unprofessional, but if he waits any longer than that he’ll be cutting too close and that’s a bad look.

“Y/N,” He says, coming to a stop before the elevators, allowing the rest of the team to head up. “I need to say something.”

You nod with a smile, covering a cute yawn when he takes a couple seconds to gather his thoughts.

You’re not sure what he’s gonna say, but you assume it’ll be to do with the date. Maybe a change of time, or a change of venue – he did mention the library café can get super busy on weekends – or, worst case scenario, the date will have to be postponed for whatever reason. And none are particularly bad, because you’re excited and just want to be with Spencer – it doesn’t matter if it’s not when he originally planned or where he originally planned.

But Spencer has always unwittingly been full of surprises.

“We can’t go on that date.”

Instantly you ask, “Why not?”

“Well-“ He seems caught off guard, like he wasn’t expecting you to question the sudden change of heart, “It’s complicated-“

“I’ve got time.”

“We should go to sleep-“

“Is it your mother?”

“No. No, it’s not.” Of course you look empathetic when you consider his mother might need him – a stab to the start. Add in the flicker of concern in your eyes – two stabs to the heart. “It’s not her. It’s- it’s nothing. Just, can we cancel?”

“And reschedule?”

“No.”

“Oh.”

The disappointment is clear on your face and makes Spencer feel so guilty, but not guilty enough to take it back. You’re not disappointed that you’re missing out on dating him, you’re frustrated that you’ve been building up to having plans on the weekend and they’ve suddenly been cancelled without reason. By Spencer, of all people. In a couple months’ time you’ll thank him, when you’re dating some bodybuilder who can grow a mean beard. You’ll thank him for not making you go on that date with him and forcing you to tell him you’re just not my type, Spence, and making everything awkward.

He can’t look at you. Maybe that’s why he misses the genuine sadness, the sudden glassiness of your eyes that humiliates you enough to make you angry. His words have ignited a fire in your chest that burns through your body like you’re made of gasoline, and you wish you could turn your thoughts off so you don’t start questioning how long he’s been wanting to reject you, if he even wanted to date you in the first place, how embarrassing it is to have been so openly eager when, apparently, he was very much not.

“I’m sorry.” He says, like it’ll do anything. He still can’t look at you and he feels like a coward.

“Yeah.” You sniffle.

He decides to take the stairs. You head for the bar, just for one drink.

+++

The following day, when an officer tries to talk to you, you blatantly ignore him. You tell him that unless it’s work-related, you’re really not interested, and word spreads quick that your pleasantries have died out and you’re not in the mood to tolerate creepy compliments.

There’s a permanent frown on your face that haunts Spencer the entire day. He knows exactly what’s going on – it’s his fault, after all – and he finds himself simultaneously avoiding you whilst witnessing your downcast mood.

Morgan starts investigating not long after you barely react to his terrible joke. He makes them for you, because you either choke on laughter or throw your pen at him, but this time it was like you weren’t even in the room. When Morgan poked you and asked if you heard him, your lacklustre reply was, “Hm? Yeah, good one.”

Morgan perches on the desk Spencer’s using. “You got any idea what’s going on with Y/N?”

“They’re mad at me.”

“You’re the reason they’re like this?”

Spencer doesn’t physically react, just says, as casually as possible, “Unless another person asked them on a date then cancelled without reason, then yes. It’s my fault.”

There’s no point in lying. Especially to Derek. Spencer doesn’t know how you’ll go about explaining your sudden poor mood, if you’ll curse his very existence or lie about it, but Spencer’s never been a good liar and the sooner everyone knows it’s his fault and he sucks, the better.

Morgan leans forward, attempting to make eye contact with the doctor who very much does not want to. “There’s a story there.”

“Obviously.”

“…You wanna go ahead and explain it?”

“Not really.”

“Alright,” Derek shrugs, “You stir in your sadness and continue being a sourpuss, I’ll go check up on Y/N and find out what really happened.”

Derek’s barely moved off the table when Spencer stops him, voice small like a child, “Wait, Morgan, I-“

You walk past then, too focused on a suspect list faxed in by Garcia to pay attention to anyone else. Spencer’s eyes follow you the whole time, and the look in Spencer’s twinkling eyes make Morgan slump back onto the table in realisation.

“Why’d you cancel, Reid?”

“I had to.”

“You had other plans?”

Spencer chews his bottom lip. “No. But I… I couldn’t take them on a date.”

Derek waits for him to elaborate.

“Have you seen the kind of guys hitting on them?” Spencer asks, scooting his chair closer so no one can eavesdrop. “They’re all… They’re- they’re like you, Morgan. All cool and put-together and actually look their age, for one, and I’m not that. I could never be that – and that’s what Y/N wants-“

“Have you asked them that?”

“No. But I’m a profiler, in case you forgot, and I think it makes sense that these big-shouldered, super muscly guys are all over-“

“But you haven’t actually asked them what they want.”

“No.” Spencer sighs, leaning back in his chair.

“That’s your first, and most vital, mistake, my man.”

Spencer purses his lips, catching you watching him over Derek’s shoulder. You immediately look away, shooting off to the evidence room as an escape, and Spencer’s cheeks burn with guilt and embarrassment.

He can’t believe he thought he had a chance with you.

“I feel like this should be obvious, Genius, but Y/N said yes to a date with you, then turned down every offer that came from someone that wasn’t you-“

“That’s because they already made plans with me and they’d feel terrible if they had to cancel for another, better offer. I made it easier for them.”

Derek gives him such an incredulous look Spencer wonders if he should burn his PhDs. “Are you serious?”

The crestfallen expression on Spencer’s face is enough of an answer.

“Come with me.”

“What?”

“C’mon,” Derek tugs Spencer up from his chair. “I need to show your dumb ass something.”

All that’s missing is classic spy music when Derek and Spencer sneak into the conference room the BAU is using. Only Hotch is in there, scribbling something down, barely glancing up when the two agents creep in like they’re on a mission.

Spencer doesn’t say anything until Derek reaches for your bag. “Whoa- Morgan-“

“Relax.”

Spencer just stares, brows halfway down his face, and watches silently.

“That’s they’re journal, Morgan, you can’t just read it-“

“It’s not, pretty boy.”

Hotch watches the interaction, mildly confused, then nods to himself when he realises what Morgan’s holding.

Morgan splays the journal on the table in front of them, flipping through pages with precision like it’s his notebook and not yours. When he lands on his desired page, it’s slid towards Spencer.

He reads it.

The Doctor Spencer Reid cheat sheet. (Because I do not have an eidetic memory and feel bad whenever I forget something he tells me)

He’s too stumped by the words cheat sheet to look further, so Derek does it for him, flipping to the next page where very basic information about Spencer sits – full name, date of birth, hometown. As he looks to the page next to it, he realises it’s full of his favourite things – favourite coffee, favourite candy (which has multiple answers, by the way), even favourite pair of socks. Like a switch has been flipped, Spencer comes to life, frantically switching between pages that are overflowing with facts and tidbits about him, from his favourite monologue from his favourite film to his favourite shelf in his apartment. All things he’s told you either in passing or when he’s confided in you at random times, you’ve taken note. You’ve listened, and for some reason you’ve written it all down so you’d never forget.

“What…What is this?”

“It’s everything there is to know about you, Reid.” Derek watches as Spencer slips through the rest of the book, filled with random to-do lists and phone numbers of various people, looking for the same information about the rest of the team. “There’s only one for you, you know. And if you ask me it’s a little creepy, but it’s saved our asses when it’s come to buying gifts for you a good few times.” He slaps a hand on his friend’s shoulder, smirking at how Spencer’s awe-filled eyes never leave the pages before him. “They care about you a lot, Reid. More than you think. So…”

“I need to talk to them.”

“Yes, idiot, you do.”

+++

That night, Elle and Derek invite you to join them for some drinks at the bar, promising they won’t let it escalate to arm wrestling and childish bets like they always do. Even though they make a compelling argument, add on that you’re stressed and upset and really, really want to forget emotions exist more than anything else, you’re half tempted to accept and lose yourself in some cocktails.

Then you spot Spencer talking in hushed tones with Gideon and everything comes flooding back. So you tell Elle to have a drink for you, please don’t make a ruckus when she gets back to your shared room, and bid them adieu.

In your room, you distract yourself by renting one of your favourite movies. It’s overpriced, and a part of you wants to look over the case files again, but being sad and burnt out won’t lead to any good outcomes.

It’s a futile attempt at switching your brain off so you don’t have to think about how excited you were for the date. You’ve had twenty-four hours to get over it, but every time you see him you’re thrown back into the bitterness you feel – bitter that you fooled yourself into thinking it’d work out, bitter that your hopes were so high, bitter that you let your feelings for Spencer become such a big part of your life.

You’re lying on your scratchy hotel bed, thinking about Spencer and how he’s going to be complaining to Morgan about said scratchy beds, when there’s a knock at your door.

Naturally, you assume its Elle. She reminds you so much of your older sister who used to slide you some money so you’d stay up late into the night and quietly let her back into the house after she’s sneaked off to go to a party – except Elle is probably swaying outside your hotel room after losing her keycard rather than swaying on your doorstep.

So when you open the door, teasing quip ready, you legitimately choke when you’re faced with a fidgety Spencer Reid.

He tries to ignore how the way your face drops when you realise it’s him feels like a punch to the gut.

“Hey-“

“No.”

“Oh.”

“You-what-“ He’s never seen you so flustered. “Are you lost?”

Just in case, Spencer leans back to check the number beside your door is in fact 208. It is, and he turns back to you, “Please don’t slam the door in my face.”

It slips out. “I wouldn’t do anything to jeopardise your pretty face.”

You’re humiliated that he has this effect on you, the ability to obliterate all your filters and common sense just by existing. But the look on his face alleviates the want to jump out of the window – his mouth opens, twitching into the smallest, most bashful smile before it falls and morphs back into disbelief. You just… You just called his face pretty, a word that makes some feel emasculated but no, never with you. You compliment people and mean it, which makes Spencer’s guilt worsen and the urge to tell you he loves you with his entire heart more intense.

You speak at the same time.

“Why are you-“

“I wanted to-“

You roll your lips together, holding back a smile, and nod for him to go on. He does the same, so you shake your head with a, “I was just asking why you’re here.”

He holds up a finger, signalling one moment, and opens his satchel to start rummaging in it. “I know this is a complete invasion of privacy, and theft, really, but Morgan showed me it and I just- Why do you have this?”

You gasp.

In his hand is the journal you’ve been working on since a month into your employment at the BAU. The gifted notebook was initially used to jot down any bits of advice your superiors gave you (on your first day, Elle gave you a list she lovingly titled “If I wasn’t an FBI agent I’d sock these people in the mouths”) but, before you knew it, it had an entirely different purpose.

It started when you witnessed Derek stumble when asked Spencer’s favourite colour, to which he said no one remembers stuff like that! Aptly followed by Spencer reeling off everyone’s preferred colours (even delving into second favourites and favoured colour schemes) and you realised then that… Spencer’s whole life, he’s remembered so much about the people around him and very rarely have they returned the favour. So, in an attempt to build friendship and because you had the fattest crush on him already, you started the Spencer Reid cheat sheet.

You didn’t think he’d ever see it, even if it’s always used by the team on various occasions. It was the team’s little secret, bar Spencer, that assisted in nearly every decision made on Spencer’s behalf – what to order from restaurants, drinks, birthday and holiday gifts, how to comfort him when he’s stressed or upset.

The responses vary. Derek thinks it’s weird, as did Elle at first, but JJ and Garcia insist its sweet and, really, no matter what they think they’ve all come running to you when time has called for it.

“How… Did you steal it?”

“Yes,” He tells you, guiltily, “I had to read it – it’s incredibly accurate, by the way.”

You don’t know if that’s a compliment or not.

“So… Why?”

“I don’t know,” You say, a bold-faced lie and Spencer can tell, but he lets you continue, “You remember everything about everyone else, so I wanted to… do the same for you, I guess.”

“I have an eidetic memory.”

You airily laugh – does he think you forgot that? “I know that. Doesn’t it get tiring recalling all this information about your friends and not having it reciprocated?”

He clicks his tongue at that, eyes falling back to the notebook in his hands that he fiddles with while he thinks. It is tiring, he supposes, but that’s how it’s always been. He remembers everything, the people around him just… don’t. He realised at a young age that he’ll often have to remind himself that friendship isn’t measured by what they remember, but by other ways – like this. You, with your unassuming journal that is full of things Spencer assumed no one would ever care to remember.

You, with your tensed jaw and fluttering eyes because you’re embarrassed.

You, who’s done quite possibly the sweetest thing anyone’s ever done for him, and it’s been happening for years right under his nose.

You, who he cancelled a date with because he was so sure you were dating him out of pity, out of obligation after he asked and you felt forced to say yes, but now he realises you care about him just as much as he cares for you.

Touched feels like an understatement.

“Y/N…”

“If you find it weird, I’ll burn it the second we get home. Pretend it never happened, we can… discuss a restraining order if we must-“

“Y/N.”

“Yeah?”

“Thank you.”

“Oh.”

He smiles at you, hands tight on the book in his hands, smiles so big that his eyes crinkle and his teeth show and he looks gorgeous. It tugs directly on your heart strings and just for a second you forget that he cancelled your date, forget that you’ve been pining for years, and bask in the warmth that radiates from him.

“This is… Insane, really.” He laughs, “But also so… so cool. I don’t deserve this, at all, and to think we could’ve gone on a date but I chickened out-“

“What?”

He shrugs with faux-nonchalance. “The-um- the reason I took back the date was because I think you deserve so much better than me. In a, you deserve someone like all the police officers down at the PD, kind of way. I don’t want a pity date-“

You scoff, then with an indignant, “Come in here,” You grab Spencer’s satchel and tug him into your hotel room, closing the door with a forceful push as he turns to face you.

With your hands on your hips, you stare him down with furrowed brows and a look that screams really? “Is that really what you think, Spence? It was a pity date?”

“Well, yeah,” He tells you. The conviction in his voice is so strong that, if you weren’t this riled up, you’d probably tear up at how sure he sounds.

You give another scoff. “Not only am I offended you think I’d do that to anyone, but I’m also mad that you don’t see how I look at you! Spencer, I’ve been into you since I started working here-“ His mouth falls open. You’re exasperated. “-and the notes were a way to get to know you, yes, but they were also because I couldn’t stop watching you and had to play it off like I was doing it for a reason. You’re my favourite, Spencer.”

His heart aches a little, full of such a tenderness he’s never quite felt before. He feels loved, and so, so touched that someone would put so much effort into getting to know him and… years. Literal years you’ve liked him, and he’s been blind to it.

“I like you a lot.” You’re breathless after your little speech, “And if you still don’t want that date, that’s okay. But I like you, Spence, I really like you.”

Your gaze never wavers. Spencer wants to scoop you up and place kisses all over. For the first time in a while, he feels worthy. Like what you’re saying isn’t being said for the sake of it, because you’re his friend and you have to support him, but because it’s what you genuinely think and feel and Spencer might be in love.

He swallows deeply before speaking.

“I really like you, too, Y/N. And I’m-I’m sorry that I cancelled the date and- I should’ve talked to you, maybe, before doing it, but… We’re here now, right?”

“You want to have a date right now?”

Thumbing through the book, he says, “Actually, there’s some blanks in here I’d like to fill, if you’re not busy…”

You’re very clearly on board with the suggestion, basically skipping to your bed, plopping down and patting the space beside you with a grin. “I’m not busy at all, Doctor Reid. Tell me everything I don’t already know.”

So he does, thigh pressed against yours and blush on his cheeks when you let your head fall onto his shoulder.

The night is spent giggling over the most random information you’ve gathered, correcting only one mistake (his favourite socks change every week, not your fault), and adding onto the already plentiful fact file.

And the date that weekend happens, ending in a sweet kiss on your doorstep that leaves you both with shy smiles and thundering hearts.

It’s the first date of many, followed by the creation of a new journal full of all there is to know about your and Spencer’s relationship.

+++

tags: @pinkdiamond1016 @bluerose512 @andreasworlsboring101 @bitchyreids @roses-and-grasses @ta-ka-shi-ma @chiffonchronicles @rexorangecouny @unmistakablyunknown @goofygubler14 @jasongideonapologist @gublertoon @averyhotchner

#spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x you #spencer reid x y/n #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid fanfic #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds x y/n #criminal minds fanfiction #criminal minds fanfic #i tried to write the first half in the past tense but i got confused so sorry if the tenses r weird

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