#and the day before… when the meat is all bought and prepped…

[morepopcornplease]

nothing quite so disheartening as discovering your friends’ answer to the question, What Do We Owe Each Other, Really? turns out to be: Very Little, Actually.

[absentlyabbie]

don't be afraid of buying things that make your life easier. don't talk yourself out of it, beat yourself up for being "lazy", or shame yourself for not being able to do things the "right" way so you don't deserve to try it a different way.

if there's a thing out there that can make something faster, more bearable, less painful, more tolerable, anything like that at all, and you can afford it? you have the right, you deserve it, and you should do it.

i've stuck for the last several years with exclusively those detachable sprayer showerheads, because i need to be able to sit down in the bath and it makes the entire operation easier, so i'm less likely to risk a concussion or pass out or wobble and slip.

for the last few years, i've been using one with a little powerwash spray setting and i use it before and after every shower and it keeps my tub and shower cleaner so much longer, which is great because i hate cleaning the bath and can put it off for months, and scrubbing kills my shoulders.

sometimes, whether it's the executive dysfunction, or the depression, or knowing that i become entirely detached from the concept of time when in the shower, if i can't bring myself to get in the damn thing and do a full-blown shower, and i know i'd just be uncomfortable and not clean and still keep putting it off (because i can easily lose well over an hour once in there), i will kneel on my (cushy, quick-dry, memory foam) bathroom mat beside the tub and lean over it to wash my hair and face and maybe soap up to my shoulders. then later when it feels like a way more manageable and shorter task i can do a quick scrub and rinse.

i've bought cbd for when my joint pain makes sleeping otherwise impossible (even though it's expensive) and a work desk that has expandable legs to be a bed desk if i ever need to work sick (i'm lucky to be remote since my job change).

i've bought the screw-top, 40oz, insulated mugs and extra long plastic straws (do not @ me) and the pop-bottom giant cube ice trays all because every one of those helps ensure i drink more water every day (and so does the faucet-mounted water filter).

i buy specific individual snacks that require little to no prep so even when the execution of making a sandwich is Too Damn Much, i can still make myself do some calorie intake.

i talked myself into a cushioned mattress topper to relieve my spine and because it's way cheaper than a new mattress. i bought blackout curtains for our old apartment because the outdoor lights were insanely bright at all hours and made sleep even more elusive.

i've purchased slip on-only shoes or no-tie laces because i hate tying shoelace knots, my hands are less dexterous than ever (and hurt), and because i struggle with time management and it's one small thing to shave off just a little more time so i'm a little less late.

i didn't buy all of these things all at once, definitely. i am, sadly, made of meat and not money.

but i started budgeting, slowly, more and more of whatever amount of disposable income i had after bills towards "thing to make life suck less and not be so hard" and i can't regret it in the least.

i deserve not only small comforts and joys, but also less pain and difficulty, and ways to make challenging parts of life a little more within my reach with not quite as much effort.

so do you.

[blankwashed]

Heartstrings p2 (P1) P3 P4 P5

When you reached home, you looked through your closet for clothes to wear for tomorrow. A date, right after splitting with your spouse.

After trying on multiple dresses, you narrowed it down to a pink frilly dress, which was also Naoya’s favourite when you pranced around in it. The thought of him made your face sour. However, it was the cutest dress he bought for you. You decided to bring a separate one to wear when you cook in case it got greasy and dirty.

Consciously, you decided on wearing a simple black shirt with shorts. Satisfied with your choice, you also grabbed a plain white apron from your kitchen counter. As you began prepping the ingredients to bring over, you couldn’t help but reminisce about the many times you cooked for Naoya during the long lost courtship days.

As the next day arrives, you head over to Gojo’s, a sleek looking condominium in the outskirts of Shibuya. Gojo greeted her and offered to help her bring the ingredients into his house.

“Wow Gojo, your house…it’s truly a bachelor’s hub,” you said to him while laughing.

That made Gojo smile, while ushering you into his modest yet cozy bachelor pad. The living room was decorated minimally, with a few strategically placed pieces of furniture and personal knickknacks scattered around. A large flat-screen TV, a touch-screen refrigerator and a robot vacuum cleaner, a true new-age man’s home.

“It’s nothing fancy,” he admitted while scratching the back of his neck, blushing. “It all serves a purpose, for someone like me to stay alone,”. While heading over to the kitchen to prepare the ingredients for cooking, you rolled your eyes at how modest he was being.

As he chatted amiably about old times and catching up on recent events, you were in the kitchen going all out on the dishes for Gojo and you.

Watching her move deftly around the kitchen, he couldn’t help but feel a twinge of nostalgia. There was something undeniably comforting about having someone familiar in his space, especially after all the years from not seeing each other.

You expertly sautéed vegetables and seared meat while being able to keep the conversation flowing effortlessly, touching upon everything from history from back then and current events. The atmosphere was warm and inviting, bursts of laughter and playful teasing, just like old times.

Gojo cleared his throat awkwardly before stepping forward to express his gratitude. "Thank you for coming over tonight," he smiled warmly.

"No problem, old buddy. It's refreshing to be around someone who doesn't constantly judge me. Sometimes I wonder how did I ever put up with that jerk..." you remarked casually as you attempted to fry scallops. Suddenly, a burst of flame erupted from the pan, momentarily startling you. Gojo, sensing your alarm, quickly rose to his feet, ready to lend a hand if needed.

You chuckled lightly, trying to brush off the mishap. "It's alright, happens every time I add oil to a hot pan," you reassured him, grateful for his concern.

After some time, the food was ready. The scallops, fried to perfection in garlic sauce, exuded a tantalizing aroma that filled the kitchen with deliciousness. Alongside them, the "Marry Me Chicken" dish, with its savory aroma, added to the smell of flavors.

"Oh my my, y/n. How have you not ventured into the culinary business yet? Everything smells absolutely amazing!" Gojo exclaimed, his eyes sparkling with anticipation as he took in the mouthwatering meal before him.

Blushing at the compliment, you couldn't help but feel a flutter of pride. With a shy smile, you tucked a loose strand of hair behind your ear.

"Actually, cooking gives me serenity," you admitted with a soft smile. "To me, it's an art, and as you know me, I love adding art into everything I do. I think of it as a creative work." A fond chuckle escaped you as you reminisced, "Do you remember when I tried to insert art into all of our Jujutsu practice lessons? Mr. Yaga got so pissed at me," you added with a laugh.

Gojo chuckled at the memory, recalling your artistic approach to Jujutsu training, as if trying to beat people up with the movements of a paintbrush. It had been a comedic time that brought amusement to the entire classroom (and a displeasure to Mr. Yaga).

"Mmm, I guess all those training sessions worked out for the better. You've really mastered something, cooking," Gojo remarked warmly. "I could eat your food for the rest of my life and never grow tired of it."

You felt a rush of warmth spreading across your cheeks at his compliment. "The rest of his life? That's a pretty long time, huh?" you thought with a playful grin on your face, a hint of redness on your face.

As time passed, you and Gojo shared jokes and playful jabs at each other, the easy banter between you creating a comfortable atmosphere. But as the evening drew to a close and it was time to go home, you couldn't shake the feeling of reluctance. It had been a while since you had experienced such close communication with anyone, and you found yourself reluctant to leave this moment behind. There was a sense of warmth and companionship that you hadn't realized you were lacking, and the thought of returning to your usual routine felt like a pain.

"I'll call you a cab?" Gojo suggested as he noticed your frequent yawns. You blushed and nodded in agreement.

"And anyways, call me Satoru. Have you forgotten my first name, y/n? Have we gone back into the last name basis?" Satoru joked, clutching his heart dramatically as if feigning a heart attack. His playful antics only made you blush even more.

"Okay, okay, sorry. I just wasn't sure if you were going to be okay with that. Again, we haven't spoken in ages," you explained, offering a reason for your hesitation in calling him by his first name.

He playfully jabbed your arm like a child. "Hey, it could be ten or fifteen years, and I would still want you to call me by my first name. You mean a lot to me, you know," he confessed, his words carrying a sincerity that tingled in your heart.

"Screw that, y/n. I'll drive you home myself," Satoru said, standing up and grabbing his keys from the holder by the door. You blushed yet again at his offer, feeling touched by his words.

"Are you staying at the house you used to live in, or am I fetching you home to the place you used to stay with Naoya?" he asked, a mischievous smirk playing on his lips.

You furrowed your eyebrows, clearly annoyed by his question. "Obviously my own place! I never want to see that son of a bitch ever again!" you replied angrily, your tone tinged with rage.

Satoru chuckled, his smirk widening. "I know~ I just like messing with you," he teased, enjoying your reaction.

(NEXT CHAPTER)

here's chapter 2!! <3

[luminousbeings-crudematter]

where you cook for Simon but the food's not all he eats

PAIRING: Simon “Ghost” Riley x F!Reader 

WARNINGS: food description. established situationship.  domestic and angsty.  also exactly what it sounds like.  18+ only.

LENGTH:  3.4k

The horror of developing feelings for someone with whom there was no chance of reciprocity was that the heart didn’t care.  The heart continued to free-fall and make a constant and consistent fool out of you. 

< Prev Part || Next Part >

_____

The horror of developing feelings for someone with whom there was no chance of reciprocity was that the heart didn’t care.  The heart continued to free-fall and make a constant and consistent fool out of you.  

In all fairness, you had tried your best to stop it, anticipating how things would end.  You’d thought about asking for some space—as though Simon Riley didn’t routinely leave for weeks, if not months— hoping you’d find the reset button in your chest that would restore the status quo.  

And then he’d come back from…wherever his job had taken him this time around, asked if he could see you. 

You were quite proud of how you’d resisted for an entire quarter of an hour before responding.

Sunday roast at mine?

What do you need me to bring?

Just be there.

You spend the rest of the week daydreaming about prepping vegetables and cooking  meat, as though your heart didn’t threaten to burst out of your chest, as though you weren’t thrilled at the opportunity of doing this domestic thing for him, with him, as though everything would be okay if he just ate a home-cooked meal with you.

It wasn’t like the two of you hadn’t eaten together before.  But you couldn’t help but feel that this was different.  

You cooked over 200 covers at work everyday.  Fuck, you’d gotten into this profession—given up so many things to get good at your job—to feed people. To make people happy using the food you put in front of them.  You knew you were good at it.

But cooking a meal for Simon?  Pretending you were someone to him, feeding him on a Sunday afternoon, pretending to be the pinnacle of domesticity?  It was almost too much.

It was almost too much because it was exactly what you wanted.

_____

Sunday turns out to be the perfect day for your lunch.  Thunder and lightning rage outside your kitchen window, trying brilliantly to outdo one another and you decide that you’ve never been more glad that he’s with you. 

You’re honing your knife while he hovers at your elbow, scrutinising your movements. 

“So…” you start, and instantly want to kick yourself for being a fool.  When has being cagey ever gotten you anywhere with him?  “When was the last time you ate a home cooked meal?”

He grunts and shifts on his feet.  He’s leaning against your kitchen counter while you stand beside him, working on it.  He’s so effortlessly sexy, it irritates you to no end.  “You ‘ave something to say about ration packs, dove?”

“As a tax-payer that funds them? No.  As someone who cooks for a living?  Mm,  yes.”  You notice how his eyes follow the movement of your knife across the chopping board.  “How does it work, do you guys get normal meals when you’re on base?”  

“Jesus, watch your fingers!” he grunts, and your eyes slowly turn back to the chopping board, secretly pleased.  “And what the fuck do you mean, ‘course there’s food on base.”  Oh, he’s nice and annoyed now.

Time to strike.

“I meant, like, good meals.  Satisfying, nutritious stuff.”

“Sure,” he shrugs.  Then sighs and his chin juts out to motion at the meat he’d helpfully stuck in the oven for you.  “Nothing like this, though.  Not fancy.”

You snort, and it’s an unattractive noise that leaves you.  “This is a roast lunch, Simon.  This is not fancy.  Fanciest part of this is the Yorkshire pudding, and only because I’m making it from scratch.”

“Could’ve bought it made, dove,” he points out, decidedly unhelpfully.        

“Heh, no.”

He keeps you company in the kitchen the whole way through.  When you tell him to go sit down, maybe put something on on the telly, entertain himself for a bit, he shakes his head.  Came here to be with you, yeah?  So he stays.

He asks intelligent questions about your work, what you do, but also why you do things a certain way.  Some answers come easy, but others you need to think about.  He stays silent during that time, never pushes, content to wait while you think about your answer.   

Eventually, the two of you fall into silence—but it’s what you recognise, what you’re comfortable with.  He’s not much of a natural conversationalist and you cherish being in a kitchen with your own thoughts—not a luxury you’re often afforded.  

“Why aren’t you workin’ today?  Thought you didn’t take Sundays off.”

“Hm?  Oh I don’t.  I can’t, usually, it’s one of the busiest days of the week.  But I haven’t really taken a weekend off in like 6 months, thought I’d do it now.”

“And you’re spending your time off from cooking by cooking.”  It’s a statement of fact, but his voice has an edge.

You stay silent at first, the motion of your knife methodically working across the chopping board both familiar and reassuring.  “It’s…different.  Cooking at work and cooking at home.  I wouldn’t fucking bother with this usually, true, it’s cereal and beers for me on Sundays, but you have not had a decent roast in some time.”  You shrug.  “I’m more than happy to spend my day off changing that.”

The oven beeps, and he moves wordlessly to pull the meat out,  the rich fragrance of the red wine the meat was cooking in instantly permeating your house.  Checking the internal temperature quickly, you direct him to put the meat back in and close the oven door.  “About 20 minutes on the meat, then half an hour to rest.  We’ll pop the Yorkshires in while the meat rests and then all we’ve got to do is roast the pine nuts.  You want to help me make the spuds?”

“Yes,” he mutters, gruff.

“Yes, chef,” you correct, and instantly freeze, your eyes going wide.  Shit.  

Through the periphery of your vision, you see his body slowly turn towards you, his arm outstretched.  He grabs your forearm and jerks him to you.  “You like being called that in your kitchen?”  His voice is raspy but soft, and it makes you shudder, makes your breathing shallow.

“It’s a sign of respect,” you whisper.

“I respect you,” he whispers back.  The hand on your arm winds its way around and rests on your ass.  “Respect you so much, sweet girl.  Look at you.”

And if anyone, anyone else, had said those words, you’d be put off, offended.  By all means, they should be mocking, condescending.  But his voice pours so much…reverence into the words, he could almost be singing a love song to you.  It jars you, the warmth with which he says the words, makes you want to retreat and hide, as much as it makes you preen.  

He doesn’t give you the opportunity to do either.

“Love seein’ you work. So controlled.  Organised.”  He bends down to you to peck you on the cheek through his balaclava, and your eyes close involuntarily.  “You’re gorgeous, chef.”  With that, he releases you, and steps back. 

You take a second to remember how to breathe, then turn back to work with a flushed face.  Your skin feels warm, and your fingers have a slight tremor to them.  This is what Simon does to you.  He says a few words to you but so ardently and with so much quiet sincerity that your heart overflows.  It makes you feel like an unmoored boat at sea.  Free to roam the ocean, see sights beyond imagination, free to fight against a storm but come apart anyway.  He is both.  He is everything.

The feeling that washes over you then makes you pause, but only for a split second.  Of course you feel the way you feel.  It’s not just sex for you (was it ever?) but what about him?.

You don’t know what he’s thinking, you reason.  Maybe this has turned into not-just-sex for him too.  You choose to stay quiet.

What you don’t know about his feelings can’t break your heart.

_____

Lunch is subdued.

Correction: You’re pleased with how lunch turns out, lunch is fine, but Simon is subdued.  Well.  Maybe subdued isn’t the right word, but he looks thoughtful. Reflective, even.   

He eats quietly, the mask sitting on the gentle bridge of his nose, exposing his lips and his lower cheeks.  He even goes for seconds, which makes your insides feel exactly like the warm pomegranate molasses you’ve been experimenting with at work.  

After you’re both done, he offers to  clean up—bringing you a glass of wine and practically pushing you out to your living room.  The day’s excitement (and your broken sleep from the night before) finally catch up with you, and you acquiesce easily, though not before you turn around quickly for a sneaky view.  Simon’s got his sleeves neatly folded up, his tattoo on full display.  He cleans the dishes with a precision you would normally use to plate up at work.  His concentration never wavers, his motions calculated and steady and…you shouldn’t be surprised.  

But, he’s a soldier, you reason.  Precision is what he does for a living.  More importantly for you, Simon has made you come on his hand, on his tongue, on his cock enough times for you to know quite well by now that he can focus on a task, give it his absolute attention, and that he can keep doing it for hours on end.  The thought makes you rub your thighs together, your insides warming.

“Alright, dove?”

Simon’s voice is closer than you expect, and you jerk out of your daydreaming with a start.

He stands behind you, his hand slowly landing on your shoulder, and you lean your head back over the headrest of your settee to look at him, his features equally as lovely from your upside down perspective.  The mask has come back down over his face, but his eyes are soft.  “You look cosy.”

“Food coma,” you smile.  “Lunch okay?”

“Lunch was great, pet,” he says and your relief makes your eyes close of their own accord.

His hands move over your shoulders firmly, massaging the tension from them, and you completely sink into the seat.  His hands are calloused, rough, but so warm.  His fingers work the muscles in your shoulder, kneading them and releasing knots in your shoulders you didn’t even realise you had. 

“Oh, oh, mm” you groan, and you can’t even tell your spine from your settee anymore. 

“Christ, dove,”  he murmurs. “What did you do to yourself?”

“On my feet 13 hours a day,” you gasp, as his hands move on to the muscles in your neck. “Horrible posture.”

“Pretty girl…let me take care of you.”  The words are a whisper that makes your eyes open. 

His words are innocent enough, but the way he looks at you makes the muscles in your stomach free-fall and your heart clench in anticipation. 

“Okay.”

“Okay,” he repeats. And without breaking eye contact, he walks around you, taking your empty wine glass from your hand and setting it on your coffee table, and lifts you bridal style into his arms, walking slowly towards your bedroom. 

It drives you insane, the slow walk, the eyes that burn into yours. Something’s changed. You’d thought he was contemplative before, lost in his thoughts over lunch, but whatever he was thinking about then, he seems to have made up his mind.

He sets you on the bed lightly, and within seconds he’s on top of you, kissing you. The kiss starts out slow enough, his mouth gentle but unyielding against yours. If you had your way, you’d kiss this man until the heat death of the universe, and even then, you’d only let him go because the matter you were both made of had fused with each other forever. 

He continues to kiss you, his hands moving over your body, manoeuvring you slowly, so he ends up kneeling on the floor in between your spread legs. The lace that covers your cunt is past the point of no return, completely soaked and entirely ruined, just by the burning thought of what Simon’s about to do to you. 

“This okay, yeah?” His words are followed by his hands rubbing up your thighs, green eyes almost black with how dilated they are, looking up at you through his lashes. “Tell me if it’s not.”

“More than okay,” you pant.  His attention has moved to the soft underside of your jaw, where his mouth keeps moving, all tongue and teeth on the sensitive skin.  Arousal moves through you like liquid lava—burning hot, obliterating all doubt and thoughts equally. 

“Will you—can I put my mouth on you?” He asks, his words slightly muffled behind your jaw. 

His thumbs move just under the edge of your top and rub against your hip bone, while his teeth bite your bottom lip.  “Yeah…yeah okay, Simon.”

_____

Simon Riley, you surmise, must be a really good soldier.  Well.  He’s certainly got the physique for it—the man is cut—and he’s got the discipline and the attitude.  But what he’s got in spades is the ability to follow through.

The man’s knees and back must hurt.  He’s a big man, much too big to be comfortable hunched over your pussy the way he currently is.  In spite of it all, he shows no signs of discomfort, looks like he’s completely content to eat you out for hours without any signs of stopping.

This okay, darling?  You like that, like my tongue inside ya?  Gonna come in my mouth, yeah?  Gonna use me to get off?  

He’s coaxed an orgasm from you already, the sensation of it almost bitter-sweet on your tongue.  The first one is always intense with him, you find.  It’s the sweetest push and pull, and he’d pushed you to your limit with it, had sucked on your clit like he was trying to pull it from your body.  When you’d come down, blinking at him, the scar around his lip was even more pronounced with the arrogant smirk bracketing his mouth.  You’d asked sweetly, then whined, then begged to suck his dick, sit on it, touch him, something, anything, but he’d shaken his head.

Took such good care of me already, sweet girl. No one–no one’s ever…So good to me, such a good girl, let me do this please let me do this for you.

He’d gone back for seconds for the second time in the day.

You rise on one elbow, the other hand going up to his head.  No hair to fist on account of the balaclava, but you run gentle fingers over his fabric-covered head anyway.  

He freezes, two fingers inside you, tongue hot on your clit.

“What,” you pant.  “What is it?”

He removes his fingers from you, and your long drawn out whine would be embarrassing if you were working with more than two brain cells.

He’s strangely nervous, his eyes darting to yours and away in a split second.     

“I–I like you touching me.”

“Uh–okay.”

“I like you touching my hair.”

That shuts you up.  The room is lit by the hint of an afternoon sun and so you’re not exactly sure where this line of conversation is going.  Obviously, you want to see his face.

You’re curious about his face, his body, God, you haven’t even seen something as uncontroversial as his shoulders.  The flatteringly tight t-shirts he wears are almost always dark and it’s not like he ever takes them off.  You’ve seen his Adonis belt in flashes.  You’ve seen his cock, obviously.  His forearms, his lips.  Of course you’re curious.

But most of all, more than anything else, you’re respectful of his boundaries.  So you try your best to make him feel safe, never ask about the mask.  You don’t need to know his life’s history to know that pain and grief are old friends.  It may not be clear on his face—not that you’d know if it was—but it’s there in the way he holds himself, in the way he withdraws sometimes, in the way he’d told you not to expect more from him before he’d ever fucked you.     

The memory makes you wilt a bit, and it doesn’t go unnoticed.  You put your tongue in your cheek and raise your brows at him, questioningly.

He huffs and shakes his head, almost disbelievingly.  “Will you…if I take it off, will you keep your eyes closed.”

It’s phrased like a question, but ends up sounding more assertive than anything.  

“I will, I promise.  I won’t look,” you whisper.  “But…would you like to cover my eyes anyway?  There’s some scarves in my closet you can use.”

He gulps.  Nods.  Stands up stiffly and grabs the first scarf he sees.  

He doesn’t make eye contact with you the whole time he covers your eyes, but just before your vision goes dark, you catch the way his throat works hard and his eyes are shiny, the way they are when he’s inside you.  

Your eyes finally covered, you shift under him, expecting him to turn his attention back to your aching cunt, but there’s only quiet and hushed rustling of fabric.  You feel his hands just barely touch your hair with feather-soft touches and an index finger wraps itself around a strand.  He breathes deeply and you feel warm lips on your cheek, before he moves down to your jaw bone.  You feel his lips move but you can’t hear his words, can’t read his lips to know what he’s saying.  His lips move back to give you one last kiss, just on the corner of your lips, before he scoots down all the way, reaching up to put your hand in his hair, and going back to eating you out.

Simon moves with an urgency now, his legs spread wider, so your cunt is at his eye-level.  He’s more desperate, licks you with more fervour.  His tongue runs tight circles on your clit, one finger, then two pistoning inside you, finding that spot that has an absolutely devastating effect on you.  Each thrust of his fingers pulls a gasp out of your open mouth, his lips so persistent but so gentle on your clit, and suddenly, you wish that you’d never met him, never started this thing that’s going to destroy you when it ends.

You feel tears in your eyes and a lump in your throat, and your whimpers must get his attention because he speeds up slightly, hitting that spot inside you just right and you grind against his face once, twice, three times, while your pleasure washes over you.  You let out a small sob, and his hand around your hip tightens in response, but his mouth doesn’t stop moving against your cunt, and you think you get away with it.

You should've known better, though, as the scarf is removed from your eyes in a second, and you feel him hovering over you.  You squeeze your eyes shut, your hand quickly going up to your eyes to cover them, wanting to give him that extra bit of comfort that you can’t—won’t—look at him without his permission.

“Pet? What’s–what’s wrong?”  His voice is hoarse, and you know he hasn’t put his balaclava back on because you hear every peak and trough of his tone.  “Did I hurt you?” he says, and his voice breaks a bit.

“No,” you whisper immediately, your eyes still leaking traitor tears.  “I’m sorry, I’m okay I promise, I just came really hard.  That’s all.  It’s the hormones,” you add, and your small, forced laugh sounds unconvincing, even to you. 

You hear him sigh before his hand tries to tugs yours away from your eyes.  You resist a bit, then give up, squeezing your eyes shut even harder, until you have a head rush.

“Sweet girl.”  The tone of his voice doesn’t sound like he believes you, but thankfully he doesn’t push it.   Instead, he melts into you, giving you sweet, open-mouthed kisses on the edges of your lips, sipping your tears, his entwined hands moving behind your neck so he can use the leverage to turn you to your side.  

You face each other, just making out for what feels like hours.  You’re so, so tired, so exhausted from the long day and the roller-coaster of emotions you always feel around him.  Your heart’s in it, but your kisses slow, turn lazy, drawn out.  You’re soon hovering on the edge of consciousness, in the dream-like state where you’re aware of your surroundings but missing context when he pulls away from you slightly, and whispers against your lips.

You don’t know what he says.

You don’t find out for a long long time. 

[msponies]

What the shit did you smoke for you to make this blog inactive!?

okay this is a little fun a little sassy silly…… i dig it i vibe….. i’m currently at my grandparents house taking my dog out so i think it’s a good time to go through my past ~14 months and together we can see where i fell off the wagon (SLASH GEN i promise i’m not being snarky! i really do want you all who have supported me to know i’m okay + what i’ve been up to)

it’ll be under the cut, and as a thank you to all of you,

oh yeah. ohhhhhhhh yeah

july 2021: artfight happens, i do two attacks and then just stop drawing ANYTHING. i started sewing again briefly which was the second crafty hobby i had before drawing (first was origami!), so that eats up my time. if i remember i want to edit this when i’m home and add a picture from my old phone of me sitting on my bed with my cats, sewing a “sock creature” (PLEASE please if you have the time look up john murphy’s sock creatures, his first book was so formative to me)

august 21: i start working at spirit halloween!!

september 21: i become close friends with this guy Vincent, we had known of each other for a while and were mutual fans of each other’s art but here we start talking on a daily basis!!!

october 21: obviously The Big One for a spirit employee, it was halloween all month baby! i had three costumes (the third was Raph from tmnt but i don’t have a pic 😿)

(side note i LOVE the turtles, the reason i got that black wig in the goth cat costume was to cosplay casey jones from tmnt2012)

november 21: by the nature of spirit halloween i am now unemployed. i try hbwr seeds for the first time which to answer the original question is most likely what i smoked to make this blog inactive

december 21: I BREAK UP WITH MY EX!!!! i found his secret pr0$h!p twitter on christmas eve so i timed pretty much the exact midpoint between christmas and new years and broke it off then

january 22: i reorganize my life!! i get a new bed frame and other furniture for my room to celebrate my fresh start. i find a very rudimentary children’s sewing machine at goodwill and get fully back into making sock creatures!!!! plus i hack a 3ds, but i know we’re all doing that

february 22: this is where i really do just become burned out for a bit, i do JACK SQUAT except make a G2 Tier Maker:

march 22: i start taking job hunting seriously… ALSO me and Vinnie who i mentioned back in september keep talking and keep growing closer; i send him a playlist of songs that make me think of our ponysonas and for the first time it becomes really clear to each of us how much we like one another 💥 the playlist in question:

april 22: i turn 24! i also start working at taco bell. i also stop working at taco bell. i watch a good chunk of pac man and the ghostly adventures

may 22: probably my favorite month of the year thus far! i journal every day, go to the park, work hard around the house and in general do what feels gratifying to me!

june 22: i go to a pride event in my city and run into a girl who i bought a teddy bear purse from at spirit! she mentions applying at the McAlister’s that’s opening next month and i follow suit; it goes poifectly and my training starts at the beginning of…

july 22: DELI TIME! i’m trained to work prep which means folding up all the meat that gets used for sandwiches, plus slicing n dicing various produce. Vincent and I are like 💓official💓 at this point or whatever….. :)

august 22: i adjust to life behind the industrial-grade rotary slicer. i get back DEEP into webkinz. Vincent and i meet up for the first time!!!!!!!!!!!!!

september 22: loooots more boyfriend time 🎉 but also i go back to school 👎

now: well damn! i’m in a little bit of a rut in full honesty; i only have so much energy in a given day and i spend most of it on work and school. i am so grateful for everyone who has shown me patience, and i want to prove that it wasn’t “wasted” on me in any way. i still have a lot of personal work to do before i can post on a reliable schedule again

thank you :)

[prettyxvenom99]

Turkey-less Stuffed Roast with Gravy (and Ghosts)

Levi preparing his Thanksgiving dinner. Lots of angst ahead.

There is no point in buying whole turkeys — they are too big. Besides, they take a lifetime to defrost, and once they do, all Levi wants is to sink himself in the puddle they leave. 

Turkeys aren’t his favorite animal, not by a long mile. They’re too much of a symbol. People only eat them once a year, in a very particular occasion: two bustling days of preparation and one big dinner, everyone around a table hand in hand, gratitude on their lips. 

But to Levi, there is no point in buying whole turkeys — they are too big, and his table too small. Instead, he bought one of those boxes of artificiality they sell at Trader Joe’s: Breaded Turkey-less Stuffed Roast with Gravy, which the store at the corner of his street has ceaselessly advertised, and to which he has finally caved.

Upon scrutinizing the packaging, he has come to a conclusion: the best thing about it is that it freezes well. This is, obviously, a dietary requirement for singles with no families — he can’t finish everything by himself, but now he’ll have food for the whole week. Perfect. He can be thankful for that. 

He slices the brown, breaded hunk of fake meat. Careful with the stuffing, he tells himself. He lays the oval pieces on a baking sheet, sprays oil over them, pops them into the oven. Fifteen minutes, the instruction says. Yes, sir! Levi answers. 

He has heard tales of what a great fun Thanksgiving dinner prep could be. This must be what it feels like. It’s just that those people would have others to perform witty dialogues with. Meanwhile, Levi only has the writings at the back of a food package — a decent conversation partner, but he knows it won’t win him any Oscars. 

HEATING INSTRUCTIONS: GRAVY. MICROWAVE (1200 watt): Microwave cook times may vary depending on oven wattage …

“Do I even know my ‘oven wattage’? Come on, nobody knows their oven wattage,” he chides. “Anyway, I’m done spinning around as my life’s tryna burn me. Let’s just use the stove top.”

STOVE TOP: Empty gravy into a sauce pan, over medium heat and stir to simmer. 

“Yes, sir!” Levi murmurs. “Ready when you are, sir!”

As the gravy waits for a simmer, the oven works with a soft hiss and quiet creaking. Levi kneels before it and peeks in with a careful frown between his brows, muttering some earnest encouragement. 

Gotta get ‘em up to … Instructions, what was it again? An internal temperature of 165 degree Fahrenheit — yeah. You can do it, Oven! You little brat, stop complaining. You ain’t even that hot yet. 

(If this all sounds a little crazy, that’s because it is. But he’s trying to have fun, and there’s only so much conversation you can have when you’re alone.)

“You look beautiful,” he breathes out when the roast is done — golden-brown slices of perfection. He bathes them meticulously in the gravy, lays them next to the mashed potatoes and cranberries he’d scooped out from their little plastic containers. 

“There you go,” he says. “All done. Great job, team. Here ends our Special Thanksgiving Operations. Successful, as far as I’m concerned. Thank you, everyone.”

But he knows it isn’t really over yet. No, the hardest part is yet to come. 

He brings his plate to his tiny dining table and sits down. He folds his hands together and takes a deep breath. 

“I am grateful for …”

His voice breaks. No prayer comes. What is there to pray for, when there’s no one left? What is there to be grateful of, when life just takes and takes and takes …

He cuts a small bite, throws it into his mouth. He looks around at his invisible guests, the ghosts around his table. He smiles. “Not bad, huh? We should do this again next year. I hope you’ll still be around, all of you.”

No one corrects him, of course. No one dares tell him the truth. 

To some people, ghosts and imaginations are all they can be thankful for. It’s a lie and an insanity, but what does it matter? People take whatever warmth they can get. Let’s not ruin it for them.

~~~

Disclaimer: This is not a Trader Joe's advertisement.

Likes and reblogs are very much appreciated! Also, happy Thanksgiving if you celebrate that.

[abramsbooks]

RECIPE: Grilled Pork Tenderloin with Chimichurri (from Meal Prep Magic by Catherine McCord)

It was in Argentina where I began my love affair with chimichurri; a pot of it accompanied whatever meat we were eating. Just the thought of pairing it with pork tenderloin makes me giddy.

PREP TIME: 15 minutes, plus 1 to 2 hours for marinating COOK TIME: 15 minutes SERVES: 4 to 6

¼ cup (60 ml) Dijon mustard

½ cup (120 ml) apple cider vinegar

3 tablespoons light or dark brown sugar

8 cloves garlic, minced

⅓ cup (75 ml) plus 2 tablespoons olive oil

1½ teaspoons kosher salt

2 to 2½ pounds (910 g to 1.2 kg) pork tenderloin, fat and silver skin removed

½ cup (15 g) packed fresh cilantro

½ cup (15 g) packed flat- or curly-leaf parsley

1 small shallot, peeled

2 tablespoons red or white wine vinegar

2 tablespoons fresh lime juice

Pinch crushed red pepper

Freshly ground black pepper

Place the Dijon mustard, apple cider vinegar, brown sugar, half of the garlic, 2 tablespoons of the olive oil, and 1 teaspoon salt in a large zip-top bag. Squish the bag to mix the marinade. Add the pork tenderloin and use your hand on the outside of the bag to move the marinade around the pork. Marinate for 1 to hours at room temperature or overnight in the refrigerator.

To make the chimichurri, in a food processor, place the cilantro, parsley, remaining garlic, shallot, the remaining ⅓ cup (75 ml) olive oil, the red or white wine vinegar, lime juice, crushed red pepper, remaining ½ teaspoon salt, and black pepper and pulse until finely chopped.

Heat a grill to medium heat. Grill the marinated pork on several sides for a total of 14 to 15 minutes, or until the internal temperature is 135 to 140°F (55 to 60°C) when checked with an instant-read thermometer inserted in the thickest part of the meat. (Alternatively, you can use a cast-iron skillet to roast the pork. Heat over medium-high heat and add 1 tablespoon of olive oil. Sear the pork all over for a total of 6 minutes. Transfer the pan to a 400°F (205°C) oven and roast for 15 to 20 minutes.)

Allow the pork to rest for at least 10 minutes to allow the juices to settle before slicing. Use a sharp knife to cut pork on a bias into ½-inch (12 mm) slices and top with the chimichurri sauce.

Make sure not to overcook the pork. Pork should never be cooked to more than 135 to 140°F (55 to 60°C). You want the internal color to be light pink.

Make double the amount of chimichurri sauce to serve with fish, shrimp, chicken, or steak later that week.

TO ENJOY LATER The cooked pork can be cooled and refrigerated in an airtight container for up to 3 days. Enjoy at room temperature or warm for 30 seconds in the microwave. Store the chimichurri in an airtight container in the fridge for up to 5 days, or freeze in ice cube trays then transfer to labeled zip-top bags for up to 4 months.

PREP IN ADVANCE Place the zip-top bag of the pork in its marinade in the freezer for up to 3 months. When ready to cook, place the pork chops in the zip-top bag in the refrigerator to thaw overnight; cook as directed.

Become a faster, healthier cook with secrets from Weelicious founder and meal prep genius Catherine McCord

With celebrated cookbook author and Weelicious founder Catherine McCord's step-by-step process, your kitchen will be beautifully organized and fast, healthy family meals will be at your fingertips—starting with 100 of her favorite recipes. McCord believes that success in the kitchen comes down to two things—organization and meal prep—and she’ll show you how to master both in Meal Prep Magic.

One step beyond the ideological approach of Marie Kondo and The Home Edit, McCord brings you a practical guide to organizing the most important space in your home and using it. If you’ve ever lost leftovers to the back of the fridge, failed to find a spice that you know you bought, or faced a cabinet full of mismatched Tupperware, her advice will forever change your relationship to your kitchen.

After showing how to maximize your space for efficiency, McCord offers up her favorite family recipes. Including tried-and-tested secrets for saving time, these recipes are easy to prep ahead, make entirely ahead, contain basic ingredients that are always in your pantry, and/or strategically employ your freezer, air-fryer, Instant Pot, slow cooker, and more. Think grab-and-go breakfasts like Raspberry Creamy Chia Puddings, creative packed lunches including easy-to-assemble Salad Jars, healthy snacks like air-fryer crispy artichokes, and irresistible dinners that are even better leftover, such as lemony chicken thighs with lots of herbs.

By following McCord's simple strategies for meal prepping, you’ll always have food on-hand to enjoy throughout your busy week, limiting your trips to the grocery store and time spent in the kitchen. Eat healthy meals you love, while saving time, money, and your sanity. Never again stress out about what to make for dinner! Meal Prep Magic is a lifesaver for any and all home cooks, busy parents, and fans of Weelicious and McCord's popular book Smoothie Project.

For more information, click here.

[fuckkbrunch]

Strap in. This is a long one.

I could have broken this into three posts, but it was all served on one plate, so it's all going in one post. Logic.

I bought my meat from a local place, and I do think it improved the quality. Going to try to do that as often as I can afford to for these recipes.

So this meatloaf is fucking massive. Tony says to cook it in "a loaf pan" but I don't know who has a loaf pan big enough for that much meat. Splitting it up would mean fucking with the cook time, so instead I just built myself a loaf pan...

This is a 2:1 mix of beef and veal. I could have diced the onion and celery a little finer, but my knife isn't so hot and I was honestly doing too many things while cooking this meal. People were texting me time sensitive shit while I was prepping, it was a whole thing. I can find excuses for anything.

Couldn't find the fresh version of the herbs I needed, so I used dried marjoram and some thyme springs I had in my freezer.

Pretty typical mushroom gravy. Beef stock instead of veal stock. Dicing a pound of mushrooms is quite possibly the most annoying prep task ever.

Now this one is 2:1 potato and butter. It called for a ricer or a food mill, which I don't have. So I took one for the team and I pressed the cooked potatoes through a perforated strainer. By hand. It took some time. Well worth it though.

This one, I had the recipe roughly in my head. Hadn't checked the book right before shopping, and I thought it needed pancetta. So I bought a 9 dollar bag of pancetta that I didn't need. Luckily I almost always have bacon at home.

These are the most butter filled mashed potatoes I've ever made. This meal used an entire pound of butter.

The sprouts were a tiny bit over done, but that's totally on me and my timing being a little off. Will definitely be making these again.

Next time I really need to do my prep the day before. My kitchen is too small for this shit...

I have to resort to using my toaster as a shelf, and my sponge holder to set my salt down on. My beautiful no name™ brand kosher salt. It'll likely be a recurring object in more than a few of my reviews.

Everything just about done, kosher salt still at the ready. It feels illegal to take ground meat out of the oven when it's only at 150°, but it really turned out perfectly after resting.

Not gonna lie, that mushroom gravy looks like a pile of cat puke to me. A few of my friends reassessured me that once you know it's mushrooms, it looks better. I think they're being nice. Look at the fin on those potatoes though. These babies are holding so much butter, it's insane.

| Meatloaf and Mushroom Gravy + Sides |

Taste is a 5 out of 5. Yep, I said it.

Difficulty is a 4 out of 5. If you do all three simultaneously. The potatoes are the hardest part.

Time was about 3 hours, give or take.

This was an amazing plate. The hint of lemon juice on the brussels really cut some of the fat and butter flavour nicely.

Even as leftovers, freaking delicious. It kinda looks like a sad tv dinner - which is totally what he was going for with this recipe - and he nailed it. In the end, I'm not mad that it made such a monster meatloaf. Leftovers for daaays.

[missguomeiyun]

AYCE dimsum

1st of its species in Edm .. AYCE dimsum @ Top One.

Located on Whyte Ave, this restaurant used to be a Korean/Japanese fusion place.

I came to this place for lunch on a Tues in mid-February. To be exact, I came on Feb. 13. From my knowledge, a lot has changed since my visit. Therefore, I will only be sharing my experience here (maybe at the end I'll share what I heard from my coworker's experience, which was 2 weeks after mine).

Okay, 1st off. I got this picture menu. I think this was suitable & useful.

The 2nd piece of paper. Also laminated, this is the ordering sheet. It has the table number as well as the check-out time. When they 1st opened, it was 2hr limit. When I went, that became 90mins; however, the lady said bcos it wasn't busy, they gave extra 20mins, which was 110 haha still not the full 120min but. .. that's the most you could get :P

Their system was actually very efficient. When I heard AYCE dimsum, I had assumed it was the traditional 'pick up whatever you want' from a communal area with steamed dishes. That was NOT it, at all.

So what did happen was. .. we filled out round 1 on the sheet. The staff lady would take the sheet into the kitchen & prep the stuff (& bring out the items as they're prepared). Once the order is complete, they will bring back an empty order sheet.

Of note, there were some minor ordering details. ..

I'm sure you see the wastage fee in the upper right corner. Keep that in mind.

& also, the lady told us that during busy times, tables of diners can only max 5 items per person per round of ordering. For instance, if you have a party of 2, during busy hrs, the 2 of you can order max 10 unique items (doesn't matter the quantity of each one; they only care about unique items). The reason for this was to ensure every table gets something, & the kitchen isn't just prepping your order.

Waiting for our round 1~ It's really unlike a dimsum restaurant haha

Took some time to see the back. The interior is same as before when it was the Korean/Japanese place. (I've been here once)

I don't know much about their hot pot but it's by weight & only available during dinner service. The AYCE dimsum service, at the time of my visit, is available all day (till they close). Of course, you can't order both kinds of service at your table. Everyone has to only do dimsum OR hotpot.

The standard: shrimp dumplings & the siu mai.

The siu mai was good; decent size, flavour was good. Freshly steamed. The shrimp dumplings - not so good even though also freshly steamed.. The dough/wrap portion was kind of stiff. The filling was alright though.

Ribs: good. Looks sad but you can always order more. I didn't eat chicken feet.

Xiao long bao was mediocre. I think you gotta be reasonable for certain things. For AYCE where I expected to just grab from a table, these were freshly steamed when the order sheet comes in so I felt it was decent. Also, the lady said they order from a supplier for most things so . .. I mean, it's not really the restaurant, it's the supplier. I think the xiao long bao is better than the store-bought frozen ones but lacking compared to other places. The beef ball, I didn't have bcos it contains the dried mandarin peel stuff, which I dislike in meat balls.

Pan-fried rice rolls. Okay, this was good as is but misleading in terms of what the name suggested. Pan-fried rice rolls should have a bit of the umm. .. well, evidence of pan-fried-ness lol these were pan-fried but VERY slightly. They lacked the crispy edges. But, like I said, flavour was good (just simple soy sauce) & the rice rolls were soft, so I don't particularly have anything to complain about. Just. .. didn't match what I expected.

Now this one is the steamed plain rice roll. This was legit like the Cantonese stuff that I've had in the motherland, which was pleasantly surprising. This kind of plain rice roll is essentially a large sheet & it steamed/scrunched up like this. Unlike the typical steamed rice rolls you see in dimsum restaurants in Edm (the ones that contain some sort of filling, whether it's BBQ pork or beef or shrimp). I REALLY liked this! It had no flavour on its own but it comes with peanut sauce. Each table also has chili sauce & soy sauce so you can customerize your 'flavour'. I chose the ribs juice from above & soy sauce.

Deep fried shrimp wontons: 10/10!

The curry squid. .. okay, they brought out a 'cold' one in error. They were really nice about it when I told them that it was cold.

The hot "ready" one; I give .. 8.5/10. Honestly, I think it was actually good to realize they do steam things fresh. Like that 1st dish of curry squid was literally... not ready.

Round 2!

Pan-fried shrimp cake & chiu chow dumpling. I don't like this kind of dumpling so I didn't commit to any lol the shrimp cake was not bad. It had a lot of shrimp but also a lot of vegetables. I've never had shrimp cake like this before.

Pork + century egg congee. This was delicious!!

Wonton in chili oil. We ordered 2 just for trying purposes but got 5. We would've kept it if we liked it but ended up sending 3 back into the kitchen (didn't want to pay wastage fee when we didn't even order that many). The wonton was good but the sauce was not. I had imagined it was like. .. a diff chili oil. This was chili oil mixed with red vinegar - it's a northen Chinese thing, I later found it. Had that Szechuan numbing spice in there. I just wasn't a fan but. .. maybe you will be!

Wings were kinda dry but pretty good; flavour was 'original' haha ie: salt. Spring rolls = no good. They were the grocery store frozen kinds & contained mushy vegetable inside.

Soy sauce chow mein. GOOD! Freshly made & you can smell the wok-smokiness.

Eggtarts . .. 8/10. Others have high standards for egg tarts but for me, my biggest thing is the filling. Not the amount, not the ratio with the crust . . just the flavour & texture itself. I dislike egg-y ones & ones that are too sweet. This was not bad but the texture was not as smooth as I would have liked it to be. May have been over-baked. But otherwise, the crust was okay. I also dislike flaky crust lol & this one wasn't very flaky.

Coconut jelly. It was alright. Refreshing, that's for sure.

Osmanthus jelly & mango pudding. The jelly was really not my thing. The texture was weird! & I generally don't like floral-y things. The mango pudding though. .. 10/10!

Alright, so what my coworkers experienced. .. they also went on a weekday for lunch, when it wasn't busy but they were given a strict 90mins. It was enough for them so they didn't mind. Plus, they didn't like the food so they were looking forward to leaving :( they had a smaller menu (like maybe 33% smaller than mine) that was presented on an iPad with some items being unavailable, which made the list even shorter! They also said they paid more than $23.88/person. Altogether, more expensive with fewer food options & strict time limit . .. & 'bad' food. Now I feel terrible for recommending. But hey! When I went, it wasn't like that =(

[doctorguilty]

Nice things!

Just got home a bit ago after doing my lunar new year shopping, I'm glad I didn't bother trying yesterday and then being rushed because of all the other errands because like while I had a general list of food ideas, I was also improving as I went based on what was there. There was tons of fruits front and center!! I got tangerines, a pomello, persimmons, and some little lady apples, some other snacking foods and a dried fruit tray, lotssss of veggies and mushrooms, also some tofu and quail eggs because I decided I'm gonna do a hotpot, since I conveniently had bought that single burner for my own use I was like huh. This is very convenient. AND they had a really great price on a big great quality stainless steel divided pot, like I was just gonna use whatever but I was like OH!!! I put aside some of my Christmas money SPECIFICALLY for this party and decorations were almost cleaned out aside from a couple things I grabbed so it was like well spend the rest on this pot and then I have it forever for my own future kitchen ;0; ♡ so I got a spicy broth and miso for the other, and all that is gonna be vegetarian since my brother is vegetarian and also has a shellfish allergy, decided to avoid any seafood, and I know my friends love veggies and stuff anyway! And then I got some uhh frozen buns, pancakes, spring rolls, and dumplings (one veggies one chicken so that's the one meat item), I'm gonna like kinda cook things as I go? It's a lot of people but idk how much everyone is actually gonna be hungry but everything I bought is also stuff I like to eat so it kinda doubles as a shopping trip for myself anyway like even if I have tons of frozen stuff left that's just food stocked up for me! We have plenty of soda and water in the house, so I just got like solo cups and paper plates from the dollar store (and some red steamers to tie the decor I could get together)

A lot of the typical LNY foods were on sale also! And it was busy ahaha like everyone was in there loading up on all the same kinds of things! I felt bad when I was checking out cause I was confusing the cashier a bit with my like multiple forms of payment I needed to use (food has to go on one card, the rest I wanted to do part cash part debit but was unable to communicate that so I just put it all on debit which is nbd I'll just deposit the cash in the bank later) ;;;; since I don't know Chinese and she didn't know English it took a little bit of gesturing and her typing numbers on her phone for me to read orz I felt like anxious after I was finishing boxing my stuff I was like oh I hope I didn't stress her too much she's obviously so busy today and there's a line behind me (that "everyone in the grocery store hates me" feeling snjfmsnfns) but right before I left she grabbed a pack of pretty red cards from under the register and held them up so I can see and then put them in my box 😭❤

(The struggle is so on me though like usually when I'm there the cashiers are some amount of bilingual but I can't always expect it, and I do usually need to use multiple forms of payment so I should really try learning some words and phrases so make it easier ;;; hopefully she knew I was very thankful to her though! That really made my day 🥺)

Anyway yeah that was my trip so! I'm excited, tomorrow I'll likely start prepping things like cutting veggies and stuff. On the day of, I'll take photos of everything to share! Last year I was solo and my family had some decor up to welcome me back from Oregon but it wasn't a whole party or anything, so I'm excited to host a proper gathering (and have friends with me instead of being alone and sad)

[bacchicly]

List time...but surprise today is actually a good day! I just need to get things outta my head to make sure I get my timing right...

Ok so I just put a pork roast in for dinner and it is currently searing at 4:25.... Turn down to 350 in 13 mins.. (likely around the time I post this)

Veggies gonna be:

- canned cream corn (heat 5 mins before serving)

- apple sauce made with the apples I am roasting with the pork (fish out and smash - possibly add more apple - out when I take out the roast to rest)

- baked carrots and parsnips (5 start prep)

Personal To Do List (listed in order of priority)

Install new latch on cupboard under sink

Clean up/ practice demo I am doing tomorrow at work

Pack for prompt departure in the morning to work for presentation in the morning

Pack for trip I am taking later this week (this is shocking I am a throw things madly in a plastic bag madly before I leave person - which I hate)

Work clothing; IT; meds; toiletries; jewelry; makeup?; find damn sunglasses and things I need to drop off at head office

Further (spend an hour more?) on my new budget tracking spreadsheet - after trying other people's solutions and failing...I am trying attempt #4567923 to get on top of family finances. This time I am prioritising a blended bi-weekly/monthly approach that I sort of do naturally. I am also building it around my actual payweek schedule. And have "coded" it to analyse based on those patterns.... I.e. what happens when it is a 3 payweek month versus a 2 payweek month? What are 1st paycheck of the month expenses vs end of the month? We'll see if this time actually helps for awhile. Sigh. I suck at all of this. Oh well if nothing else...when you talk about working/middle/academic/artist class people funneling their money back into the economy instead of saving...and how important that can be... Well let's just say I see myself in that picture...and I am torn about how I feel about it. Money is a huge source of shame for me.

Re-attach eye patches on Stringbean - take photos and share

Ok so here's the timeline based on all that...I am only putting in the musts and then I am going to come back and fill in what I achieve:

It's 3pm (as I type) and I've turned down the oven:

1 am - sleep - alarm set for 7 am

Key time points working backwards:

1 am / 2 am... Who is counting

10ish - kid to sleep

11:30ish - husband home

Got kid to sleep by 10:20... Then tackled more work. Got it done eventually. We'll see how tomorrow goes.

6:30 - latest time to serve dinner

9:15 - drive to hockey & home

Helped with purple hair washing; but also did some work work. Didn't have to drive... Husband got ride.

8:00 to 9:00 - kid bath, jammies & reading

Fed people at 6:45...before that tried to do some work work but my computer needed charging so I did more on the family budget.

6:20 - call folks to wash hands, plate, choose documentary for dinner, cats in "cat jail" (we keep them out of the dinning area for fancier meals since they have terrible table manners)

6:15 - heat corn

6:00 - take out meat to rest and tackle applesauce

5:15 - carrots and parsnips in oven

Put parsnips & carrots in oven early. Now I have an hour to do some work. I wish I had an office.

5:00 - start carrot and parsnip prep

Work through personal to do list for 2.5 hours

Finished doing the latch...but I had to use armature wire to create a custom latch for the one side...apparently I should have bought a bigger latch.

3:20 - post my list

2:45 - write list

[brightgnosis]

Bruh. I am so wildly freaking proud of myself right now!

I've never baked those really thick, 1+ inch, heavy bone-in kinds of Pork Chops before. They've always just been too expensive to really afford- and I also just don't cook meat much in general (to the point it's about as much of a running joke in my Husband's family as my penchant of removing nuts from every recipe that "requires" them). We got lucky whenever Covid really screwed up the food production there for a bit and everywhere was discounting their meat, however. So we stocked up gooood- and one of the things we snagged heavily discounted was two packs of 4 of of them apiece.

We'd intended to grill them, actually? But then it got too cold early in the year again, so we never got the chance to do so- and they need to be used because they were already discounted to expire when we bought them (and those kinds of meats do tend to freezer burn a lot faster in my experience) ... So I finally pulled them out the other day to give it a shot myself in the oven. Then I spent today doing a bunch of research on good temps for the oven, internal temps to get it up to, how long to actually cook them, and all that jazz because 😬 panic.

I am very happy to say I pulled it off flawlessly and those are easily some of the best Pork Chops I've literally ever made in my life 😭 New food achievement unlocked!

For the sides I did go with the Sage Fingerling Potatoes (made with Fingerling style cut Red Potatoes and Crushed Sage instead, because I forgot to bring my jar of Sage from this year's garden up with me and I was too late in the prep to go back down and grab it). And I did the sautéed Mushroom and Green Beans, and added crushed Juniper Berries and mixed Peppercorn to those.

I'm so glad I didn't ruin it and waste all the food (though I'm sure they would have all eaten them anyways, but still).

[countessofravenclaw]

The 2023 writing Advent calendar: Day 13

13. Hot Chocolate

So, this is going to be direct continuation of the Day 21 of the last years calendar.

“Matteo is going to freak out when he sees what we have cooked!” Luna squealed excitedly as she picked up the recipe, “So, how do we start?” 

“First we need to boil water,” Ambar pointed to the step one. “Can you pur the water while I chop the chilis?”

“Yep!” Luna said enthusiastically and grabbed the biggest pot she coil possibly find.

“Okay, is it now done?” Luna asked after she and Ambra had finished putting all the different components into the pot. Luna’s apron was almost completely covered with different sauce spotches. 

“No, now you need to leave it to cook,” Monicaa said whole looking at thier concoction. “But I congratulate you. This is actually quite impressive for beginners. You can just add the salt later.”

“We forgot the salt?” Ambar looked at the counters. 

“But, didn’t we cookit it already? Luna asked confused, “I mean we put the meat on the pan.”

“Yes, but that was just the precooking,” Monica explained, “This is a stew that needs to be slow cooked so the meat is tender. It will take about two hours

“Two hours?” Luna  exclaimed, “That long?”

“Well, it is only just 8 am,” Ambar pointed out, “And the everyone’s coming at 12, so there is plenty of time.”

“Oh, okay,” Luna nodded while Monica put the pot on the stove on a low heat, “But what do we do next?” 

“What do you mean?”

“I said I’d be cooking Christmas dinner.”

“It’s boxing day.”

“I know, but it doesn’t matter.” Luna continued, “I can’t leave it to one dish. Mom, what else can we do?”

“Well, everything else is pretty much prepped,” Monica looked around, “They won’t need anything done for another hour…”

“There has to be something! I don’t want just sit around for an hour.” Luna kept insisting. “I need to surprise Matteo. I can even peel potatoes.”

“Actually,” Monica kept pondering, “there is something. I haven’t had the time to start the hot chocolate yet, and we’re going to need a lot of it, meaning multiple batches.”

“We can do that!!” Luna jumped up on her feet, “Where’s the recipe?!” 

“I don’t use one more often than not so wait a moment so I write some ingredients down for you.” Monica grabbed a piece of paper and a pen. “Here. I have made some modifications since the few weddings we catered during the winter.”

“Is it going to be hard?” Ambar took the paper from Monica and Luna was craning her neck to see it. 

“Not hard, just precise,” Monica answered, “Measurement need to be right and you need to be careful about burning the milk. It also can get messy, but I have faith in you.” She leaned toward Ambar briefly and whispered, “You’re in charge.” 

“We got this,” She nodded and handed the paper to Luna so she could take her weddings and engagement rings off and put them on a chain on her neck. She really didn’t want lose them in a vat of boiling chocolate. “Luna, you might want to take your rings off too.”

“Why?” Luna raised her nose off the paper. 

“Do you want Matteo’s mother’s ruby get incased in chocolate?” Ambar looked at her, “Have fun explaining that to him before the wedding next year.” 

“Oh, you are right,” Luna finally seemed to understand, “But could you imagine how cute rings made of chocolate would be?”

“I can but lets focus on this,” Ambar took the paper back, “Okay, first we need milk.”

“On the fridge!” Luna jumped up ready for action. “How much?”

“Two litres,” Ambar answered and grabbed a pot and put it on the stove. Monica’s recipe wasn’t that complicated, but it included all sorts of things that you didn’t put in your everyday store-bought cocoa

“Here’s the milk!” Luna came back with two cartons of milk. “Do I just pour them in there.”

“Yes,” Ambar nodded and started turning up the heat. She though better that she would keep the eye on the milk, while Luna prepared other things. Not that Ambar was some sort of a michelin chef, after she and Simon and had moved into together, she had burned her fair share of different food she had tried to cook without his help… “Next we need to melt a bag of marhsmellows into this and then two bars of chocolate. She chocolate will probably need to be grinded coarsely.”

“I can do that!” Luna said, after dumping the bag of marshmellows into the milk. “I love all the Christmas cooking. I already came up with three different ideas for a gingerbread house for the next year.” 

“Maybe that one won’t topple down,” Ambar laughed slightly. At this point everyone had seen the disastrous contructiona attempt that Luna, Jim and Yam had made. Luna had started chopping chocolate bars down with such a force, you’d think that she was trying to cut down a tree.

“Here, what’s next?” Luna gave Ambar the chopping board and started scanning the paper again. “Peppermint extract, and then sugar… Who knew this many things went into hot chocolate.”

“I think we need to boil this now until the chocolate is melting,” Ambat stirred the pot. 

“This is so much fun!!” Luna did few twirls, “Maybe I should go wake up Matteo and show him what we have been doing.”

“He’ll so grumpy if you do that,” Ambar noted, “Wasn’t this supposed to be a surprise. If I’d try to wake up Simon right now, he’ll fall right back to sleep, even if I put vat of caramel on front of his nose.” 

“Yeah, i’ll let him sleep,” Luna nodded, “Only because I want to party till next morning. Is it done soon?”

“I think so…” Ambar looked at the pot. 

“Uuu, let me taste!” Luna jumped up again. 

“Go ahead,” Ambar nodded and handed Luna the ladle.

“What giant shovel have you been stirring this with?” Luna examined ladle. “You could serve porridge to all the elves at the North Pole with this. I think—”

“Wacth out!” Ambar exlaimed a nanosecond too late. Luna flingled the ladle around in a way that cocoa splattered to almost everywhere. Ambar was able to dock just in time. Luna on the other hand got almost completely douched. “Are you okay? Did you get burns?” 

“I don’t think so…” Luna licked her lips. Maybe the licquid had cooled down enough, thankfully. “...this is delicious.” 

“Yeah, I’ll put this to cool,” Ambar took the ladle from Luna, “You should probably go change.”

“Okay, see you in a bit.” Luna shrugged and dashed to upstairs. Since she and Matteo would be staying the night, she had plenty of clothes. 

“What happened to you?” Matto raised his head off the pillow and Luna crashed inside her room where he had been sleeping, “I though you were decorating, not playing in the mud…? You know what … Do I want to know?”

“It’s a surprise,” Luna said simply as she pulled some clean clothes out of the bag.

Well, well, well... This is what you get when you let Luna lose in the kitchen

[msbarrows]

July 15 to July 27- managed to flake out of doing my Thing A Day posts, and for considerably longer than I thought it’s been at that (feels like a week, it’s been more like two). Haven’t done much in that time other than laundry, and partially cleaning the upstairs bathroom. Need to get out of the doldrums and start doing more stuff. Also resume doing these posts because mostly they’ve been at least partially successful in reminding me to do more.

What I can remember of the last week or so below the cut.

July 19 - dug meat sauce out of the freezer and we had that and pasta. I’m surprised I can even remember back this far.

July 20 - starting prep for a colonoscopy next Monday, so made an easily digestible supper of pan-fried haddock and homemade hash browns. The last “real” meal I’ll have until early next week. Thankfully brother is going on a trip starting tomorrow so I only have to worry about cooking for myself over the weekend. He spent the afternoon making a big pot of sausage & steak chili to take along with him

July 21 - made a vat of stock, partially to use up some freezer burnt chicken (a half chicken and four thighs), but mostly to provide myself with well-cooked chicken and stock for this weekend. Brother forgot to pack his chili, crock pot full of it was sitting out on the counter when I went downstairs to turn off the heat under the stock pot, whoops. Chili is now in fridge.

For supper I made a cheese and chicken sandwich with mayo on white bread, and picked all the very-well-cooked chunks of carrot out of the stock pot to also eat

July 22 - ran two loads of laundry. Deboned the remainder of the chicken and froze most of it. Also divided up and froze the chili and most of the stock (which I’d strained yesterday and then chilled overnight so I could skim off and discard any fat). Cut up a beef roast into stewing beef and froze it in 1 lb amounts for future use.

For supper I cooked some white rice in stock with a little dried tarragon, and added some of the shredded chicken to it.

July 23 - the fun of clear liquids only day! I will not go into the gross details of what prep involves (google peglyte it if you’re curious). When I was finally able to ingest stuff in late evening, my supper was some lime jello made using grape-apple juice, and later a soup mug full of chicken stock.

July 24 - colonoscopy day. Brother drove me there and back. I am now four polyps down, and am being referred to their big polyps specialist to remove a fifth (the big ones apparently need different instrumentation to remove), which will mean re-doing prep at some point in the near future. I am SO not looking forward to that - the colonoscopy itself is no biggie but the prep sucks so very, very much.

Pretty tired since I had to get up at stupid o’clock to do final prep. I will be avoiding blue gatorade for some time to come, since that’s what I was mostly drinking during prep (aside from the Peglyte itself) and now find its flavour revolting as a result.

Had to gently reintroduce my digestive system to food after getting home, so supper was vanilla yogurt, applesauce, a banana, and a slice of white bread and cream cheese, spread out cautiously over the evening.

July 25 - cleaned upstairs bathroom. Brother off at a golfing stag party for someone, so I stayed easy on my digestive system and made tuna rice with green peas for supper. So nice to have a vegetable again after days without any.

July 26 - finally got around to using up the chayote I bought before leaving Toronto (they last forever and a day when refrigerated) and made chayote & chicken wraps using some of the cooked chicken from making stock.

July 27 - supper was chili and rice; some of that steak & sausage chili my brother had made. It was delicious.

[mitchamsocialuser]

Vegetarian Wood Fired Pizza Recipes

If you are a vegetarian or vegan, you probably want to eat a meal that is not laden with meat and cheese. However, it is not always easy to find tasty foods that are both healthy and delicious. Here are a few recipes to get you started.

Fava beans

You can find a variety of vegetarian wood fired pizza recipes. These types of dishes are fun and they don’t have to be boring. The following are a few tips and tricks to help you create a pizza that’s a bit of a treat for your taste buds.

Firstly, you will need a few things. The main ingredient you will need is fava beans. They are a bit more complicated to prepare than the traditional legumes and the prep time can be quite lengthy.

To make the most of your fava beans, you’ll need to parboil them for at least two minutes. This will ensure that they stay firm enough to be used on your pizza.

Fungi

When it comes to vegetarian wood fired pizza, mushrooms come in all shapes and sizes. You can add them as a topping to your pizza or you can use them as the base for a mushroom themed flatbread. Mushrooms aren’t just for dinner though; you can cook them into a soup or stir fry. They also contain Vitamin D, which is a good thing.

The top of the line is probably the porcini mushroom. Porcini mushrooms are the best of the gourmet pizza mushrooms. If you want to get fancy, soak a few of these beauties in hot water for about 30 minutes before you start prepping the rest of your meal. Afterwards, saute them in butter or olive oil, and voila!

Pesto

You can use your favourite pesto for this tasty pizza recipe. In just 10 minutes you can enjoy this delicious Greek-inspired pizza.

The best thing about this vegetarian pesto pizza is its contrast of textures. The crust has the tangy flavor of pesto, and the topping is juicy and cheesy.

You can use your favorite store-bought pesto for this recipe. Or, you can make your own. If you choose to make your own, you can make it with soy-based feta.

Having a pizza made with a variety of toppings is a great way to incorporate a healthy meal into your diet. If you have a favorite veggie, such as zucchini, a pesto veggie pizza is a fun and easy way to get your vegetables in.

Artichokes

Artichokes in vegetarian wood fired pizza is a delicious recipe that you can make with the help of just a few ingredients. You can add a variety of flavors and colors to this dish. These vegetables are rich in fiber, protein and minerals. They also have high antioxidant properties.

First, you will need to trim the stems and outer leaves of the artichokes. You can use a paring knife or kitching scissors. Once you have done this, you can remove the chokes with a grapefruit spoon.

Next, you will need to slice the artichokes into slices. Traditionally, the four seasons pizza is made with artichokes.

Mixed greens salad with prosciutto and lemon diijion vinaigrette

The mixed greens salad with prosciutto and lemon diijion vinaigrette for vegetarian wood fired pizza is a crowd pleaser. Not to mention it is fun to make and even funnier to eat. It’s the perfect recipe for family gatherings, potlucks, or when you just want to treat yourself. All it takes is some slicing and dicing and you are set for a day of yums. Plus, you can do all of this in a flash with the Instant Pot.

Aside from the requisite greens, you’ll want to include a few ingredients that are sure to impress the most demanding of palates. For instance, you’ll want to include a variety of cruciferous vegetables and a little extra fat to help you get the most out of your servings. You’ll also need to add some vinaigrette to keep things fresh.

Tony Boloney’s Vegetarian Pizza

Tony Boloney’s Vegetarian Wood Fired Pizza is not your average pizza joint. It’s a venerable establishment that has been serving up the good stuff for over a decade. And it’s not just the food. The restaurant has a fun and engaging ambience as well as a nifty “mutz” machine that pulls fresh produce from the kitchen.

Tony Boloney’s boasts a wide variety of choices for the meat eater as well as the vegan in the family. There’s a build your own pizza menu and a variety of salads and sandwiches for those on the go. While the restaurant’s menu doesn’t have a full vegan selection, it does offer one burger and one sandwich sans animal products.

[myriad-ofmuses]

You shouldn’t have bit him. Not there, not in that circumstance.

“I know..”

She muttered bitterly to herself, haphazardly throwing groceries in the cart, glaring up at the shelves of things she couldn’t quite reach. Normally, Cal would be there with her, and compensated for her diminutive size by handling the items that were stocked higher. 

She grit her teeth, shaking her head and forcefully pushing her cart down the aisle again, her long padded tail dragging miserably behind her.

Stop thinking about him. That’s the whole reason you left him behind in that place, isn’t it? To get some distance?

And that’s why he didn’t give chase, he knew you needed the space too.. what little he could give, at least.

It was fine.. she could go without the items out of reach, it was just a trip for necessities anyway.. she didn’t have to rely on him for everything.

Even though you absolutely do.

“Shut up..!”

She hissed at her own mutinous brain, she could feel the telltale sting behind her sockets and she would absolutely not cry in public. Using her oversized sleeve to wipe any threatening moisture away, she heaved a deep breath and made her way to the front to pay for her items.

She knew most of the cashiers pretty well and as she definitely wasn’t up for friendly chatter, she chose to scan her own groceries, making sure everything was bagged up securely before she paid and rolled the cart back into its corral, hefting her bags and making the short walk to the portal back home.

The portal let out a few blocks from their cul-de-sac, and within ten minutes she was at the imprint scan that allowed her entry into their home, a bit winded from her heavy burden but making it safely to the kitchen to deposit everything on the table.

Her mind was still in turmoil and the moment she’d caught her breath, she was unbagging groceries and putting them away, the next moment in her frenzied whirlwind, a knife in her hand and vegetables already half chopped, a pan on the oven sizzling with browning meat.

Snippets of time were lost to her as her mind attacked itself, tears flowing freely now that she was behind closed doors, gradually, the oven’s six burners were all occupied with some partial recipe being prepped, most of the groceries she’d bought already being utilized in some way.

You were happy when he came looking for you this morning.. were you hoping he’d follow you this time as well?

“No..”

She was lying to herself and she knew it, she couldn’t deny the sting of disappointment when she’d come through the door and waited for.. something, anything.. a hand on her wrist, a call of her name, but had only been staring at a closed door for ages, until forcing herself to do something productive.

He was probably relieved for the break. Your lives revolve around one another, it’s rare that he gets the chance to be rid of you.

“..I know. Maybe.. I should.. move out.?”

The whispered question was shared with the empty air, trying to ignore that chill that the inquiry had wrought upon her soul, the fresh tears that leaked down her cheekbones and into the food that was still being auto-prepped, two pans of varied casserole already baking in the oven.

“Why am I here..? I’m just.. taking up space.. making it impossible for him to.. meet someone else. Someone he might love. Who could.. love him back..”

You are. It should be obvious by now that you don’t fit his puzzle. He’s just too kind to tell you that himself. I’m sure he resents that you haven’t taken the hint yourself.. that you’re still here.

“..I’m sure he does.”

It was a poisonous thing she knew, to fall in line and agree with her intrusive thoughts, normally.. she’d spit fire at them, deny them at every turn and drown them out with an outpouring of positivity, but.. it all just rang so true, this time.

Even so.. she knew that it was a drastic thing to consider. Maybe.. she could compromise, and leave for a few days, clear her head.. give Cal a taste of what it would be like for her to be gone, see if.. that’s what he preferred.

If they were better apart, like her mind kept trying to persuade her.

She didn’t want to pester her friends, she had enough saved for a short stay in a hotel, she could.. call and make sure her shifts would be covered by the new hire, she definitely had enough vacation days saved up.

She wished she had parents she could run to when she felt this way.. a mother that would hold her and tell her that she was overreacting.. or agree that time apart would be in their best interest to figure things out. It had never been easy.. to navigate her tumultuous life without guidance.. and she knew that Cal’s parents would stop at nothing to push them together, even if they were wrong for each other.

By the time she came back to herself, the oven was stuffed with casserole and the kitchen was a disaster area, setting about mechanically cleaning up her mess while she continued to make plans in her head.

She made the necessary calls and made sure to turn off the oven before she poked her head through the closet door to let Cal know about the dinner she’d made in her frenzy - honestly, probably enough food to last until she came back.

With that done, she packed some clothes and other necessities in her Mew Mew mini-pack, shouldering it and quickly writing out a note on the recently cleaned kitchen table.

‘I’ll be back. Just need some time alone to clear my head. Bye, Callisto. Be safe.’

The cartoon heart with kitty face and whiskers that she always used as a signature was probably more shaky than usual, and there may have been a suspicious blot of moisture, but there was little she could do about it.

With her items in tow, she took one last look toward the closed closet door and sighed, head lowering under her cat-eared hood as she stepped out into the night, the door locking behind her, and a single flash of light indicating that she’d departed.