#and the english version is okay but sometimes you just can't hear what they say because it's too low or it's covered by the music

[ladymiraclewings]

"We made a mess into the festival, what now Golden Boy ?"

"What now ? Let's do what we do best !"

"RUN !"

[yuseirra]

Ch 160 ..let me jot down my stream of consciousness about what I feel, my reading comprehension skills can't be that bad, it'd help if I can sit down and think through a little more.

+ Okay, I'm complete! I understand things much better now!! Upon close examination, This chapter doesn't change anything so dramatically.

IT STILL DOES NOT ANSWER JUST WHAT THE DAD'S MOTIVES ARE, but... the conclusion I have after having reread it thoroughly??

It's that my interpretation of him as a mild guy still stands—it enhances it, even. He's still really kind, which is a pretty surprising conclusion compared to what I felt about it at first glance.

He's.. really kind and considerate. I'm serious. wow.

well, analysis/interpretation below!

I was spoiled about chapter way back sometime last Friday, right? and it was pretty accurate in sense, with it being just some bunch of sentences and that one really creepy panel.. it does help to see the actual art and the expressions that are associated with the dialogues.

Now that I sit down a bit, there are two different interpretations of the same story: Kamiki's testimonies on what's happened (I believe these are all truths. They perfectly match up with how I've interpreted his character all along.) and Aqua's takes on them.

I'm not reading things off the english version btw, so the dialogues may differ.

According to what Kamiki says,

-he considered Ryosuke and Nino as good people and as friends. But they approached him because they were obsessed with Ai, so he didn't know about their true colors.

-so he was able to talk about his breakup with her and talked about whether if he should visit her having children at the hospital where Gorou was. They went and killed Gorou, but Kamiki had no idea about that.

-on the day Ai died, he was still unsure about meeting her because he lacked the courage to see her face (god he's timid) so he asked Ryosuke to give her his bouquet on his behalf

I KEPT SAYING THIS GUY NEVER HAS IT IN HIM TO "SCARE AI!!!!!!!!!" HE LIED IN 154 OUT OF GUILT BECAUSE HE THOUGHT AI AND AQUA WANTED REVENGE ON HIM!!! SEE!!! I'VE BEEN!!! RIGHT!!!! I'VE BEEN!!!!!!!!!!

This was already in the leaks last Fri, I basically felt the same way about these back then

and I got every part of these right except for the part that Kamiki befriended them. I just couldn't picture the people who killed Ai or would actively go hunt their daughter down being his friend..

but seeing how.. much he seems to trust people, he used to be that way as a child, it actually all ties so nicely together.

I predicted that it was Nino and Ryosuke who went to the hospital and killed Gorou.

I predicted that Kamiki just wanted to send the bouquet to congratulate Ai but he couldn't go because he was nervous/sad from the phone call. I said that ever since I started drawing hikaai fanarts, you would have seen me going on and on about that, I drew them with this as the base!!!! The guy Ai chose wouldn't do such a thing as trying to get back at her!!! See??

I couldn't be more right!!! I am a prophet!! I should trust myself!!!! why am I so unsure of myself, really. I really, really did get everything right.

These must be all true. He's not lying about any of this. I've been analyzing this guy very very thoroughly so I know what I'm talking about.

I guess what's confused me was the latter bits, since Fri and even after I see the full images.

Kamiki smiles and says he never wanted to hurt anyone<this is really how I view him as well, this guy can't hurt people out of his own will...

However, Aqua dismisses Kamiki's statements as lies on the spot, and accuses him of having been unable to protect his own daughter. That he's been intentionally manipulated people to get what he wants. That would involve him causing people to kill each other without dirtying his hands.

Upon hearing Aqua stating "You wanted to kill your own daughter", Kamiki makes this really eerie smile (I kind of wish this is redrawn hshsh.. it looks like he's a demon spawn from hell, but this could REALLY be him being distressed yet AGAIN. this guy SMILES when he's that way. That's his coping mechanism. It's kind of hard to stare at that expression but that smile certainly ISN'T a happy one like the one we saw in 159. This is a really confusing habit he has. People are going to take him the wrong way but; sadly, it's become a habit of his...)

The scenes then shifts to visions of him manipulating nino and Ryosuke into doing what they've done with a smile. If this is really what's happened, then he IS someone pretty evil-

but now that I read it over I think that's just based on Aqua's interpretations about the guy.

Is what's being portrayed in those pages ACTUALLY how he is? Just yesterday, I theorized that Kamiki loves his children and has been doing whatever he's been doing for his children. I did have my reasons for making that claim.

We still don't know what his motives are!! Aqua doesn't state anything about why Kamiki would do such a thing if he's done so. Does he know anything about this??? Just what reason would make it.. enough to have someone kill the love of their life and their very daughter? What good would it do for Kamiki? For one thing, does he have ANY good reason to kill Ai at all? For having felt betrayed?? Then why wait out that long????? Killing their daughter? After having her live for, how long now? how old are they now? 15?? 16? Why now? Why would he??

The important thing would be just WHY he'd be doing all those things if he's really been so, so WHAT IS IT AQUA?? WHAT??

Forgot to mention this but in the beginning of the chapter, we have kamiki saying, Hm, but what did I do? Did I "stab someone?" did I "push someone off a cliff?" I never "did" "anything".

Then we have Nino going "Kamiki-san didn't do anything. He just talked about Ai. He talked about her so we(her and Ryosuke) wouldn't forget about her. That was enough to make us break."

OH come on. COME ON. HUH. I feel like he's never told them anything bad about Ai, he probably let out how much he loved and misses her, because he thought they were her fan and coworkers as a fellow member, I bet he was happy to befriend people who knew about Ai because they share a common interest together. With it being his favorite person in the world even while he was dumped.

What a stupid reason, Nino. You brought everything upon yourself. I can see that now.

I do think.. kamiki has some sort of power that causes people to grow insane or act out, that could have had some influence on ryosuke and nino in a way...

but again, why would he try to kill his lover and his daughter even if he can use it with his own accord??? Even if he's using those powers now?? Would he use it to do those respective things?

Even if he has those, that shouldn't be all there is to it. According to Kamiki, they were already obsessed with Ai when they approached him and YEAH! Makes sense?? They came to him first, probably already aware that he was Ai's lover?? He isn't responsible for them hoarding those kinds of feelings!!

Coming to think of it, I find it really strange that he still hung with nino being the complete wreck she is. Oh wait, I guess he still could. Ryosuke killed Ai and Nino doesn't seem to have played a part with that. Nino was there with Ryosuke when Gorou died but she's not the one who's pushed him off a cliff. Ryosuke's the really...horrible one. He had a pretty gf like nino JUST WHY. Then again, nino was obsessed w Ai too so they were a match. I guess Kamiki hanged with Nino thinking she's just another victim who wants Ai back or whatever. He still hangs with her when she says that are super creepy like she can't forgive Ruby if she surpasses Ai though.. Perhaps he's really bad at letting people go.. OH, YEAH. He was always pretty attached to people as a child. Okay, I got that part cleared up on my own. Stream of consciousness is like this. It can happen.

Continuing on!! Aqua says Kamiki is a "despicable, selfish liar, worse than a murderer". Even Kamiki can't smile hearing that. If he ISN'T one, then that'd hurt.

Well, he responds again, saying:

"Ah, yes. You're the same way as I am. You share those same eyes I have. The type of eyes that grant the power to persuade others into believing you. The eyes that grant you charisma, befitting that of a star." Then we see a panel with Ai, "The eyes of liars, that fool, and make others submit to you"

he must be thinking of what Ai's told him when she talked to him about having the same eyes. (CH 140)

"You've been inciting people just like I have, right? Just how many people did you fool to fulfill your goal?"

"It must have felt good to use your talents to impact the lives of others, right?"

I'm not sure if this is a taunt/mockery or just him stating the facts as a liar/a black star user himself.

If he's thinking about Ai... then it can be the latter. She approached him saying "they are the same". He could be thinking about that.

Actually, he's strangely calm. His emotions are a bit hard to read on this one, I'd say it actually feels collected compared to what he's heard.

This could actually be sympathy or empathy...

I didn't take it that way when I first encountered it, so I felt.. Kamiki could be lashing out a bit but no. That doesn't seem to be it.

Hey, he really never gets angry. He actually looks a bit sad depending on how you look at it, I think he may be feeling a sense of guilt in that particular panel where he says "Just how many people did you fool to fulfill your goal?", the one where he glances down,

just like how he talked to Aqua in 152, "It's a lie, isn't it? it's because they're important that you keep your distance from them. why would you go that far to bottle yourself up?"

This guy understands his son really well. In fact, I think he may be trying to say, "we're the same=I understand the way you are, we're on the same track" the way Ai's done for him. That's what was his salvation.

Aqua does not take this well.

He says yeah, we're both terrible beings, but Ruby is "different".

Oh, and the rest.. what's stood out to me is the panel where Aqua goes,

"sending love to the one who desires for love" as he describes what Ruby is doing. Kamiki shows up in that panel.. This is what Ai wanted to do for him.

and there's a panel that comes up that shows Ai with the twins that follows right after saying:

"it's the eyes of the one who desires to love someone"

This is really sad. I think that page actually indicates Ai desired to love him while he desired to be loved from Ai. That happened both ways. It was a nice page.

Yeah, and Aqua points his knife to his dad like a toy gun saying

"You must disappear right here and now, for Ruby's sake."

I don't think Aqua's actually up to stabbing him, actually? If he's pointing the knife at him like that, I think it's more like he's warning him to stay out of their way forever, scram, or just go die off on his own.

Both of his eyes are white, he's not going to kill him with his own hands, rather, he's going to make him go away.

So I don't think next chapter would start on a fierce note? Kamiki does not seem like a guy that gets agitated so easily. He STILL never once got angry in this chapter as well. He's still pretty sweet to his son. I'm not being biased on this, the way he talks has always been really soft. If this were to be an anime, you'd hear how he'd talk and see whether if he has thorns in them but I don't think it's that way at least, I think he's trying to be understanding??

This guy is soft. He will not put up a fight. I don't know, he may jump off that bridge and try to die maybe. If that's what his son wants? Move out of the way? He doesn't seem.. angry about it all. He's not even protesting.

In the end, the only thing that got proven in this chapter was that Kamiki DID NOT DO ANYTHING IN A PHYSICAL SENSE, AND HE DIDN'T TRY TO SCARE AI.

the fact about him manipulating people and lying to get his way, I think there's low chance of it being applied for Ruby and Ai's case.

I think he really didn't have a clue Nino would attack Ruby? If he's considered her as a friend?

what are the basis of Aqua picturing him that way? He must really hate his dad. There is no way he could have seen such things happen. Unless Tsukuyomi told him about it?? there is no proof that it's what's actually been taken place. Kamiki could have incited people, or influenced others, yeah, but I don't think he did anything to Ai or his daughter. Again, I think he loves his family. Why wouldn't he??

Until things get cleared up more, I???? I ACTUALLY?? think Kamiki's taking it in a really calm manner despite all the things he's being accused of??

This is very long, but that is all for now!!

Oh, this was worth revisiting and analyzing. There's a lot more I see when I scrutinize it like this!!

[jina-juhi]

the possibility of us.

pairing - yuta × female reader

word count - 7.7k

warnings - Panic attack (i tried to keep it short) penetration, protected sex, grinding, corruption kink, yuta is not angry and dom, controlling, over stim if i can say so? oral ( both receiving ) and literally everything that comes w this. choking!!!! yea. heh.

summary - You promised yourself you wouldn't fall for him, and you thought he could never fall for a girl like you. There was no way you both could be together, and even if there was one, your past wouldn't let you.

playlist

"eyes off you" - prettymuch

"phases" - prettymuch

"under the influence" - chris brown

"slow down" - chase atlantic

"show me" - black atlass

"safety net" - ariana grande

"used to this" - camila cabello

"chills, dark version" - mickey vallen

"3:00 am" - finding hope

"no guidance" - chris brown ft drake

Authors note:- so this whole thing is someone's request and i have not done justice to it. But here i am still hoping that they like it. I wrote like a whole seed to tree thing but it all got deleted and then I just left it to where my mind led me. I swear im working hard on my English vocab and duh sentence forming skills, but i hope you get the feelings mentioned below~~~

also if u wanna like request something~

m.list

so fucking loud.

The party was getting louder and overwhelming. You were quite alright just a few seconds back but it only takes a thought, to remember everything you want so badly to escape.

You danced like crazy, and drank. A lot. To forget. And now your head is hurting like hell and you don't know what to do or where to go, everything is spinning around and its all a blur. One thing that you could think of right now is your phone.

Searching your pocket and the couch you have been sitting on for so long, you can't find it. Its not lost its with Haewon, your friend. Sadly though your friend had to leave early due to some urgency, you thought it would be okay, you would manage but truly speaking, you're just a child. You try to be brave but being left alone is one of your biggest fears.

The fear kept building up since you were a kid and now it has settled in and made itself permanent in you. First it was your dad leaving you and your mom for a second family, then your mom in chase of her new life and then your so called first love who thought you were too fucked up to be loved. Leaving you like you were a crumbled up piece of paper ready to be dumped. Since then, you have not loved.

Not because you forgot, but because you're sacred.

You're scared everyone would leave you just like them and in the end, they'll move on, they'll live better but you're gonna be wounded. Trust me, you're already wounded enough to go out there and put a knife in your chest with your own hands. You know better or so you may think. That being alone, and not letting anyone in is the key to overcome this but truly, it is just making it worse. You can't help it.

You stumble on your way out of the once filled room with sweaty bodies, heels in one hands and a bottle of water in another. Your legs hurt more with every step you take, mentally cursing yourself for going absolutely reckless. You stand leaning against the main gate, supporting yourself so you don't fall in the wait of a cab.

You watch as tired bodies pass you by one by one. Everybody having someone to lean on to, you have a door. Not complaining but it feels sad sometimes not to have that one person who's always gonna stick by your side and other deep shit. It gets lonely. Fiddling with the hem of your dress, you give up on waiting, shifting your wait from the gate to your feet, you start to walk in the direction of your home, finding it hard because of all the alcohol.

Not even two steps forward, you hear a faint voice calling your name, a voice you would recognise even after your death, a voice that could send you into overdrive in a mere millisecond. You find yourself panicking, why is he calling your name, he shouldn't be calling your name. He's supposed to be the mean guy like everybody says but he's good to you, he's supposed to be cold hearted but he's kind to you, he's supposed to ignore you like he does everybody else, but he treats you different.

Nakamoto Yuta is not supposed to know you.

But he does, and that's what got you falling for him. Hard. It began with a single look in the hallway, you were a fresher and he was in the senior year. You weren't allowed in the library back then which you didn't knew, so you went in to issue some books. A bunch of seniors saw you, scolded you for not abiding by the rules, they could have gone too far but Yuta kinda saved your ass in there. He'd been kind, which was very unlikely of him because they all called him cold-hearted, but you saw no such characters in him, he'd always been nice to you. No matter how much you refused you did had a minute crush on him since that day, which eventually turned in something you'd rather not give a name to.

You turn around to see a very familiar face, you could draw an exact replica of him with your eyes closed. You fumble, he hands are firmly griping you by your arms, holding you upright, "you okay?"

On usual days, if Yuta is taking the first floor hallway to get to his class, you'd take the third floor even if it means you'll be late by five. But on some very rare unusual day, when your hormones decide to throw random tantrums and make you realise how much dry of a pussy cat you have, you'd take the same hallway 0as he does in order to feed your brain with his mere looks alone, which would be enough for the next 5 to 6 days so you could go back on avoiding him, for the sake of your sanity.

Today, most probably was a usual day. Throughout the party, you made sure to not cross paths with him but always keeping in check as to where he was. He looked drop dead gorgeous today in that white tshirt of his, loose hair falling over his face blocking your sight of view but adding up to his perfection. Maybe, just maybe you might have been too obvious with that watching from afar game of yours you think he didn't notice but he does. He knows, he always has known. Boys like him, they always know.

"I just wanna go home." Your voice comes out tired and slurred, the alcohol in your system is probably damaging your sense of judgement, you're saying things you're not supposed to be saying.

"It isn't safe for you to go alone." His voice could make you fall to knees, yea that is the amount of power he holds on you. If he says your name one more time with that pretty mouth of his, you'd be curling into a ball and stay like that for the rest of your life because it would save you from the embarrassment of facing him with your red flushed face and needy eyes. Yes, you're a sucker for him and you don't like it. It's not about him it's about you. How could you risk everything again for just a crush. He's not just a crush. And what about the too fucked to be loved part? What if thats true? You can't risk losing Yuta.

"I'll tak- a cab or somethin you don't have to." Sitting in the same car, having him around you when you're drunk and could literally say anything is not a safe option, safer than going alone though but, it's just too much of a risk. He doesn't give you much choice when he says he's gonna drive you home and you're gonna be quite and let him. All those moments in which it was only him and you alone, all the amount of tension in the air there was is playing on repeat in your mind right now. What could possibly go wrong right? Nothing really went wrong before, but you also weren't drunk.

He takes you to his car, walking beside you still holding you tight. You didn't say but your stomach keeps hurting from time to time, probably from all the drinking you think. Opening the door for you he seats you in, placing his hand on your head carefully so you don't bump your head in the process.

You wait for him to come inside the car, hearts already beating fast. Don't know why but the alcohol has somehow made you more hornier and confident than before, especially him touching you played a major part it in. I mean your allowed to have a crush right, and even though you don't really want someone in your life right now you too want some, need some. How many days can you go without being touched? is two year a normal number?

"Put your seatbelts on." You were too disoriented to understand and implement, he repeats. "Oh!" You try to pull the seatbelt down, its stuck. Or maybe you're just weak. He notices you struggling. What happens next is not the first time, he does things like these often that do some unexplainable things to you. He would randomly place his hands on your shoulder in the middle of nowhere making you jump out of your skin, or rub his thumb against the back of your hand when you're having coffee with him. Play with the long strands of your hair, tangling then detangling them. Eyes contacts were definitely his thing, he's eyes would never leave yours during a conversation no matter how small or big, it made you hard to look at him and hold his gaze. These were some of those moments you couldn't get over even after trying hard.

This guy would be the cause of your death. All happens in one sudden move, he loosens his seatbelt, leaning over you extending his hand to reach the seatbelt that seemed to be really stuck, which he could have managed to pull from afar but no, he had to come close. Goosebumps from his wild eyes form on your skin when they watch you, like undressing you. Up and down and around. Biting and wetting his lips unnecessarily just to turn you on. You, on the other went stiff, for you it was like some one had pushed the pause button because every second felt so heavy, the weight of his gaze was so hard you felt your lungs crushing under the pressure. You could literally listen to your heart thumping in your ears like some one was playing a boombox on maximum volume. Afraid to take your eyes off of him, you just stare blankly at him, though that blank expression was more of a wanting one.

He knows what he's doing, the little curl on his lips showed that, and he knows the effect it has on you so he always over exaggerates everything that he does. You never stopping him is his motivation.

"Dumb girl" he mouths and secures your seatbelt. You gulp hard and release the breath you were holding in. Before you could register what had just happened, his hand was reaching for your forehead with a tissue. "You sure you good? you sweating like crazy!" poking his tongue he hands you the napkin, you pretend wipe your face, actually cursing him making you sweat like this. The ac is not broken, its his fault.

Its so fucking complicated it's like you've got this big crush which isn't even a crush anymore, and it is him who turned it into real damn feelings that you don't want. You know you're better off without him, without the feelings part. You're not ready for him. You'll never be. You know it still you always fall for him, even when you don't want to, even when you know someone's gonna get hurt in the end. It must be something that he said that got you off track. That got you thinking shit and feeling shit, you just can't ignore that anymore. A year is a long time to pretend that you absolutely do not adore Yuta. Its getting harder to pretend.

You crave him.

You need him.

You want him.

but no.

You're saying it as if he wants you too. The possibility of him falling for you is as rare as finding a galaxy in the night sky with naked eyes. Impossible. He's got high standards or maybe you're just not his type. He may play round and about but it's just a play. Not reality. And you've come to peace with that. You're not gonna try, you're not putting your heart at stake but if you do, just in case, there's no way you're gonna have your heart broken because after doing all the math and physics, the probable occurrence of this event called 'us' is zero, even after considering all the factors affecting.

There is a chance, but you wouldn't take it.

But even the greatest of the greatest laws have exceptions, don't they? Not everything can be calculated or predecided. Now who knew a day like today would come in which the drunk you would be driven home by a totally sober Yuta, and the very science that you thought was denying the possibility of you both being together is giving you an unforeseen factor that could change the whole equation, alchol. And alcohol, as we all know is a bitch.

Miserable looking you was sat on the passenger seat, hair tousled, body covered with sweat that glistened whenever light fell on it, lips dry and eyes tired. Though the heat you feel is undeniable, you try to not give in and have some sense of control over your mind that's floating in the pool of hormones mixed with alcohol right now. Pushing your hair back, you look out of the window, chasing the street lamps, counting them to keep you distracted. Clearing your mind, trying not to think anything. Not to feel anything, but the ache in the pit of your abdomen is growing with passing time. You see yuta roll down the window, his hair swiftly swaying with the breeze, what a sight to be witnessed, enough to distract you from your chosen distraction. Allowing yourself to calm down letting go of all the blood rush from before, you take a deep breath, sleep kind of taking over your body but the pain isn't allowing you to. Feeling even more uneasy, you shift a little in your seat pushing the feeling away. You try and concentrate on the moving landscapes, breathing deeply.

Yuta has been noticing you. Hes certain of what's bout to happen. He doesn't panic, he must have had the experience. He lets you take your time. Breathing helps for some time more, but doesn't prevent it. You have to throw up, "Can y- stop the car?"

In a minute, Yuta pulls over and you're out on the street seated by the footpath trying to empty your stomach. Yuta was seated by your side patiently with a water bottle in his hand, rubbing your back in sweet circular motion, and holding your hair back. "It doesn't wanna come out!"

You complain in a broken tone. "Who told you to drink that much when you can't handle it?" he says side eyeing you.

"It's hurting"

"Drink some water" And before you could, you were already throwing up. He calm you down, never once leaving your side, holding your hair back, he knows you're weak especially right now.

Cleaning up you pout, "I was feeling good"

"Now you're not, dumbass."

"Why do you always call me dumbass." you fake cry, more like dunk cry.

"Because you're too cute." He half chuckles.

"I don't wanna be cute." You snap at him. "I wanna be hot!" This makes him laugh. "And i wanna be cool and i wanna be free and i wanna be different and confident and happy and not dumb. I'm not dumb, though i like it when you call me dumb, but im not im not dumb!!"

He looks at you, amused, brows up like a puppy, smiling like a child at this new face of yours that, that he doesn't quite know how to describe it, but is adorable. "You don't talk this much when you're sober, you should drink often."

"And throw up like this every time."

"Yea maybe, it would be an our thing"

"An our thing?! Oh and i don't talk? you don't talk!"

"I don't because you don't, and i respect that."

"I- I don't? i do, i want to."

"What stops you then?" You think.

"Yuta." and you chuckle. "He makes me nervous."

His eyebrows furrowed for a second after suddenly listening to his name from your mouth. Conten and eager to know more, "Why?"

You sigh loudly, hiding your face in your hands, "It's hard to explain you know? It so fucking hard-!" by getting to the end of the sentence you actually break down into tears. Yuta sees this, suddenly extra concerned about your situation, he takes your face in his hands, cupping it, making you look at him. He has a soft expression on his face, a kind one. "hey there, don't cry, it's okay." he coos, wiping a tear away.

You sob a few times in his arms, trying to catch a breath. You don't know why and what you're saying, but it just flows out of your mouth, "I like him, i think i do, like so fuxking much. And it's sad because I don't think he likes me back, like why would he and even if he does, it's not gonna change the fact that im too fucked up to be loved."

He frowns, disappointed in you. Looking deep in your eyes, you try to hide away from him,"You're not girl. Look at me! you are capable of being loved"

"I don't think so. Even if i am, why will he ever like a girl like me!" You say blandly.

"What if he does?"

"You think he likes me?"

"All you need to do is ask."

"Why can't he!?" His hand leaves your face, wiping your fallen tears. Making you drink a little water with his hands, he slowly says, "what if he's afraid he would scare you away?"

You're tired eyes look into his bright one, searching for meanings you couldn't find. He helps you up, now that you've been feeling better than before. "Not if he holds me tight enough." Yuta doesn't reply to this rather his eyes glint, as if he was satisfied with your answer. As if he knew what to do now. He makes you seat in his care again, securing you with the seatbelt, too tired to even move your finger you let him guide you home.

Soon enough you were standing in front of your apartment, staring at the locked door and then staring at each other, "I'm sorry." you apologise because apparently, you lost the keys and no they're not with Haewon. "It's okay lets just go to my apartment." You nod your head, tip toeing behind him like a child, on the stares he lets you walk by yourself but watches out for you. In the car he gives you a bottle of electrolytes to sip on. In the lift of his apartment he practically have to carry your weight because your legs gave up walking and your brain stoped working.

_______

Wet kisses were planted down your spine, leaving a tinglish feeling behind. With every kiss your breath hitched a little more, eyes squeezed even harder. He plants a kiss at the bottom of your bare back. You arch your back, rolling your head back in pleasure. He stands up behind you, your knuckles turn whiter. He grips your hair in his fist, pushing your head back further enough to plant a small kiss on your forehead, then releasing the grip. Holding back a moan, you let a short breath out. Seeing your efforts at holding your moans back, he lands his palm flat against your clothed ass making you fall ahead on the counter. Smacking it hard again, making you yelp in pleasure, the sound echoes in his small bathroom. "Let me hear that sweet voice of yours baby." His voice calling you baby makes you dizzy, a whine leaves your lips without your permission, but on his command. Anything he wants you would do. Rubbing and groping your ass cheek he pulls you a little up by your hair, making you stand straight. He bites and nips at your earlobe. With his one hand squeezing your ass and his lips occupied by your ear, his other hands creeps it's way in front of you, dipping lower and lower until it cups your pussy, applying only slight pressure on your throbbing, untouched clit with his middle finger, just enough to take you over the edge. His hand is so big. He taps it, feather touches only. Once, twice and he continues slowly with long intervals in between the taps, leaving maroon marks on your shoulder. He only plays with you to make you wetter so you could take his dick, he's not letting you cum just yet, you deserve more, you deserve his dick and you deserve a grand climax, because you're his. Without much efforts he pushes you flat against the counter top, carefully though, he doesn't wanna hurt you. Delivering you pleasure is his only motive, and he does just that when he pulls your underwear down enough to expose your ass to him. You wiggle it a little in anticipation, and he gives in to your plea, after all it would be his pleasure to serve you. He greets you with a spank. And then another spank followed by intervals of him easing the pain and rubbing your ass cheeks untill you voice came out louder than the sound of his hand meeting your flesh. And in a blink of an eye your panty was slid all the way down and his thick girthy cock was being shoved in your already dripping aching hole. He was showing no mercy, fucking in and out of you at a demonic pace, looking like an angel! His long hair covering his face, slick because of sweat. He yanked you up with your hair causing you to scream out, still slamming in and out of you, this angle enabling him to go deeper. Sinfull voices getting louder and louder with every thrust, you hear him say your name, "y/n!" He sounds concerned. Furrowing your brows, "Yuta, don't stop!!" you whine as he slows down his pace.

Another loud call of your name forces you awake from your dream, panting heavily you adjust your vision to the lighting in the room. The first thing you see is Yutas face, concerned. Seeing him in your bedroom starled you, you hastily move back in defence, "what are you doing here" You question him in hoarse voice, your throat dry.

"It's my bedroom and you called my name. " he hands you a glass full of water, sitting by the bedside. That's when you realise the change in the intensity of light and the unfamiliarity of the duvet. Embarrassed, that you just dreamt of the guy sitting in front of you, you thank him for the water. You try to play the events of last night that might have led to this, nothing comes to your head. Its all a blank. You mind curse yourself, head hurting a little probably because of hangover. The second thing you notice is that the cloths you wore weren't yours, it was one of his black tshirts, as he owns many, and before you could look at him with an unquestionable question, "You were sober enough to change, I didn't." He answers. You relax your shoulders, sighing.

Just the very presence of him makes your head go into a never ending spiral. It was embarrassing looking like shit in front of him. You called my name, what the fuck. "Your head must be hurting?"

"Not really, I just need to take a shower." You say shaking your head confirming that you are alright.

He gets up.

You don't know what you did last night with him, or said but it feels like you pretty much fucked up in every way possible. You don't even know if the whole session was just a dream or you both actually really did something. You watch him uncover the curtains and opening the window so some fresh air could come in. He opens his cupboard taking out some pills, keeps them on the side table for you. Too busy thinking, you didn't hear whatever he said and watch him exit the room keeping a black tee on the chair.

whatever the fuck happened last night.

Taking the pills you went for a quick shower, wearing again one of his tshirt. Going in the another room, he already prepared lunch for you. You take the spoon in your hand, and it's some kind of soup. You smell it, the aroma filling you up. "You're not eating?"

"I am." he says sitting down beside you. You never knew he could cook, such a dream boy. You dip the spoon and circle it around in the bowl feeling anxious. "You talked quite a lot last night, you kno-" he bantered eyeing up playing with the spoon. Without a second thought you interjected, "What exactly did i say?" not looking at him.

"We have a lot of time to discuss that in detail, right now focus on eating." he poked, smirking. "Just tell if i said something offensive or you know, stupid I won't stay for long." Finally taking a sip of the soup while it's still hot. "Look outside, its raining." he says moving his head towards the window wanting you to look out. It indeed is raining, which means you will have to stay. 

"So now that you're staying, why not have some fun? You play video games?" he asked cheerfully.

"No." you deadpanned.

"I knew, we'll watch a movie then." You look at him blond eyes, he's goofing around again.

He made popcorns, everything was set in front of his decent sized tv. It was like he was being extra cautious about everything, thinking twice before saying or doing anything. You on the other hand were embarrassed and awkward as hell. God only knows what beans you spilled last night, the possible things you could have that are coming to your brains are extreme. Plus he's not even telling.

He kept a decent distance between you two when he sat down on his small sofa, it was a small sofa so the decent amount means close enough to feel him right next to you. The movie was playing but neither of you were paying any attention to it. If it wasn't for the presence of the other, you could have both said the rain was distracting. Already tired and even more tired after forcing yourself to concentrate on the movie when exactly you dozed off to wonderland you didn't remember. One loud roar of thunder startled you back to life, "It's okey, just a thunder, go back to sleep." His words come in a low register, whispered close to your ear his hot breath almost tingling. You shift comfortably on what felt like a lap, shooting your eyes open you realised the position you were in and quickly sat up murmuring sorrys and fucks while trying to hide yourself, "When did i sleep!?" you mumbled, rubbing your eye, in order to avoid his.

"Sleep again you look tired." he pointed out looking at you. As if it wasn't awkward enough already for you to sleep in his goddamn lap. You shake your head, "No its good." You grin at him. His eyes never leave your frame. You shift to the left putting as much distance possible in between. He notices it. "Do I make you nervous?" 

 fuck yes.

It was like the oxygen was taken away from you. You tried breathing but it was useless. So this is one of the manys of what happened last night. "I said that?" He looks at you, nodding his head lights. "And they say one doesn't lie when there drunk." raising an eyebrow. Pressing your lips together you turn your head to the tv, "Let's not talk abo-" he didn't let you finish, "Answer me." He turns off the tv causing you to frown, "Answer!" You roll your eyes looking away again, it's hard maintaining eye contact right now. "What do you wanna hear?" 

"Truth."

You look at him. For a minute nothing was spoken. You looked at him and he looked at you. And that was that. Many of the hardest one minutes of your life. You sigh out in defeat, giving up the eye game, he sits straight. "What else did i say last night?" 

"Just that." 

You laugh, "That can't possibly be true." 

"Then you already know what you might have said last night." Wetting your lips, looking out of the windows, rain pouring harder by every passing hour, things getting more and more awkward. You could either tell him everything, and expect him to not act on it and be awkward Or you can just ask him to pretend last night never happened and let everything be awkward for the rest of the lives, because theres no way things are going back to normal, as if they ever were. 

Clicking your tongue, "Will you drink hot chocolate?" The only way to avoid a conversation is a hot chocolate. It works most of the times. All you wanted to do was escape his vicinity.

You stand by the window in his small kitchen, rain drizzles over your face as it falls down, rainy seasons are gloomy, you think. Cold air rushes in leaving you cold and shivering, alone, in the middle of the darkness in this room with your thoughts which are way too louder than your capacity to hear. You don't know why but him knowing how you feel about him just complicates everything by a thousand fold. And what if he wants to be with you? What will you do then? Yes you like him but, you can't risk being in a relationship again. You've already lied to yourself everyday by believing that you'll not love him, but now you do. And the fact that last night will fuxk everything up between you two is saddening because you are going to say no and he will not be very appreciative.

If; he likes you back. 

You feel his presence behind you. Not too close but not too far. You call out his name, he confirms. After a moment you speak, "Yes you make me nervous." trying to speak loud and clear but you voice only manages to come out in whispers. You hear him cackle. "I know." His deep voice goes straight down to your core, leaving you weak in your knees, he's standing just behind you. You feel his breath on your ear making you hold your breath, not moving even one inch. How desperately you want his hands on you and how badly he wants to sqeeze you in his arms and tell you everything he's been keeping inside for so long. Only if you knew. Only if you saw his face right now, looked into his eyes. You would know he wants you too, he always has. Since the day he saw you on your first day he craved you. Every day being by your side wasn't enough but oh he was just so scared to lose you after being told everything you've been through by your batchmates. He figured your past won't allow you to. So he kept quite. Falling in love with you everytime you looked at him, everytime you smiled at himz shyed away from him. He fell in love with the way you lived and laughed and cried. Just like you fell for him. 

"Take a chance with me?" he spoke lowly, carefully. You turned around, facing him. Shaking your head no caused the tears to fall down that were building in your eyes. You kept shaking you head moving back untill your back touched wall. You sobbed, no you were practically crying like a child in front of him only it was on mute. He approaches you coming closer and closer it was like you lost your mind and your senses gave up on working. "I can't" you managed to speak aloud.

"Why?" he asks trying to stop your crying at the same time. Holding you by shoulders, gently stroking up and down, calming. "You don't know what happened." 

He lifts your tear stained face up by his fingers, making you look at him, "I'm willing to know." he pushes further, caging you between him and the wall. "And if I don't understand, make me!" it's hard to understand the expression on his face. He's sad but, he's also angry. And frustrated and hurt but at the same time, gentle and understanding and concerned. Hands moving to cup your face, "You want me to confess first right? I love you okay? I have ever since god know when. And i know you do too so why the fuck can't you just let go and let me!?" The last part he says through greeted teeth while punching the wall behind you, you jump out in fear, "Fuck Im sorry." he apologizes under his breath, realising he's being to harsh.

He moves in closer, connecting his forehead with yours, "I'm sorry." he breathes out heavily, he's crying. He's hurting. "I can't help but think of what we could be." You open your eyes to look at him, tilting your face up a little, closing in the gap even more. His eyes are tight shut. "I can't help but think about you." He opens his eyes to look into your dark ones, getting lost. You both breathe heavily, hearts beating at the same pace, passion shooting through your veins. He closes the inches left in between you too, both of you close your eyes, nose touching, breathing in the air only the other can provide. His lips linger close to yours, quivering, afraid to harm you. Afraid to scare you. Chest heaving up and down in synchrony, lips ready melt into each other, only a moment apart, only a touch apart, still apart.

He draws a sharp breath in moving away but only slightly. You look down, the tension in the air is so heavy it could crush your weight under it. Tears still falling down like a waterfall.

 "Please don't say no." he speaks in the quietness. You shook your head again, whispering "Don't cry." 

He wiped it as quickly as it fell. "I'm sorry" you say, trying to move past him, but he stops you holding your hand, making you turn around. Gripping you face with only one hand he crashes his lips on yours, you pause. You didn't try pulling away, not because his grip was too tight but you didn't wanted to. When you moved your lips, he moved his. He held you by your waist with his other arm. Making you dizzy, holding you close you could feel his beating heart against your chest. Head tilted to deepen the kiss, body crushing into each other like planets colliding, teeth clashing like two swords in a battlefield, hands roaming the bodies freely, holding on to each other like you were to lose them the very next second. He could taste your tears in his mouth. He could taste his life. It was beautiful, it was perfect. In that moment you felt you could let go of everything that was holding you back, you past didn't matter in that moment. You saw one chance, one possibility. 

Struggling to stand straight, he walks your over to the counter never leaving your lips. He slows it down, letting you breathe. Softly sucking your swollen lips. He takes your lower lip between his teeth, he bites it so hard you whince in pain, which only makes him lower his hands and squeeze your butt, pulling you lower body to meet his, grinding into each other, desperate for each other, not getting enough and wanting more and more. The visible bulge in his bottoms evidently hit the right spots, making you lose control, making you go wild and grind yourself into him too. The height difference makes it so much easier like his body was made keeping you in mind so you both could fit each other perfectly. His hands travel north, tangling your hair and pulling them down, which makes your head go back, exposing your neck to him. His lips leave yours, sucking in a new space found, leaving deep red marks, marking you as his.

It took one single thought to pull you out of it, again. You try to push him away, struggling at first, he backs off, and the moment he does you leave, "So you're going to ignore me now?" he says panting, making you stop and turn back. He looks at the red mark on your neck that he created. He chuckles, "Thats the plan? huh? Ain't gonna work." you're hurting him you know it. You turn around to leave, "You're gonna come back."

And you leave.

You just leave. 

And like that, 5 months pass. The day turns into night and night into day, you go to college and come back home then go to college again. You see him every day and he sees you everyday and like strangers you cross paths. He started a new job, you heard. You started having panic attacks, he heard.

Sit and stare out of the window, thinking of all that you could have done differently. You thought not being with him or anybody would make things alright. Being alone would make your head clear and a little less messed up and then maybe you can go out date freely without having to be afraid of what might go wrong. But it seems like it all backfired on you. Now you have one more thing to forget, one more thing to carry everyday.

You thought you would get better, but little did you know it was him who was making you better. You thought you would get over him but you really do love him. You can't get him out of your head and he's gone, you fucked it all up. You broke his heart which ended up breaking you too.

Sitting on the couch in the parties is the only thing you've been doing lately. How long can someone pretend that they're okay? A month? A year? You've been doing it since your childhood. You're tired of pretending and tired of hoping that it's all gonna get better. You can't even pretend anymore to be honest, it's evident you do that you miss him. You've been sitting here for 3 hours, just sitting not drinking. What if you get drunk? Who's gonna drive you home you have no one. He's here too. Not drinking. Not looking at you, not thinking about you, rather having fun actually. he moved on?

Why wouldn't he, why shouldn't he? It wasn't his fault. You're the only one to blame. He cried, he begged you to stay to not say no, but you didn't listen to him. Why should he wait on someone like you. You push all your hair to one side letting them cover your face in an attempt to hide from Yuta, you can't help but watch him closely, laughing and talking and everything, he's faking it. You know him this much to know which smiles he is faking. And suddenly he is looking at you. Earnestly. 4 minutes of intense gaze and then you give up. Breathing already uneven and your palm is sweating, you know what's gonna come. You throw your head back to rest on the sofa and stare blankly at the ceiling.

I shouldn't have said no.

I should have stayed.

Why did I do it.

I knew you i wrong.

I broke his heart.

It's all my fault.

Something is really wrong with me.

I made him cry.

He really loved me, how could you!

"Fuck."

The walls were closing in on you. It was going dark before your eyes, you couldn't shut your brain up. It was like you were trying to breathe but couldn't like someone evacuated your lungs out of oxygen or maybe there wasn't any oxygen left in the air to breathe. Head was hurting like someone was constructing a fucking road on it. You were panicking, heart beating at an abnormally high rate, sweat collecting at the low of your back. You lose complete sense of the surroundings. You try to get up but can't, so you just sit there on the sofa in the middle of a crowded room, trying to breath, with your head down to your knees. The music and the people get too loud, it felt like they were screaming your name you shut your eyes and cover your ears with your hands, just praying this would pass away soon.

A jacket was thrown over you, over your head. He was rubbing your back up and down, in an attempt to soothe you. He makes you shift from the position you were in to a position where your head was down on his knees, and his jacket still covering your face. His hand creeps under the jacket to caress your hair and he whispers sweet nothings in your ear, trying to make you focus on him, and on his voice.

You start crying in his lap, under his touch listening his voice after so many days, you missed him. His heart aches seeing you like this, watching you deteriorating day by day. He hated that he couldn't do anything, couldn't help you through it but he knew better. He knew nothing he could have said or done would have made you realise that running away was not an option, you have to face it, face your past and get over it, let go. And let love. Because what is love is not a risk? what is love if not taking a shot in the dark? what is love if not a mere chance? what is love if not a distinct possibility? Him trying would have just made you push him away even more! He wouldn't let that happen, so he waited on love. He waited on you. . He calls your name, twice "listen to my voice okay? It's okay, you're okay! Just try to breathe." You nod your head, the tears disappearing in the fabric of his jeans. "Let's go out okay?" He asks, after five minutes or so he walks you out of the room. Breathing the fresh night air somehow calms your nerves but you're still hyperventilating. He makes you side on the boundary wall that's pretty low. Your still a mess, eyes watering and breaths hitch you murmur small sorrys to him. The crying is just making it all worse, he noticed. Taking your face in his hands making you look straight into his eyes, "Breathe in." he asks you to and you do "hold." you hold your breath. "Release." you let go. At first it was hard but with his help you gained control again.

"I'm so sorry Yuta, i was i was trying to protec- protect you. I didn't wanted to hurt you i swear on my life." You sob. He nods, coming face to face "I know, you did your best."

"But I made you cry."

"because i couldn't see you hurting, also you left but i knew you were gonna come back."

"I tried that day, i wanted to stay i wanted to be with you but i couldn't i just couldn't bring myself up to believe that i was deserving to hold you. I-

I didn't deserve you, i still- "

"Don't complete that sentence or I'm gonna be real mad at you."

"no listen to me i don't have anything to give you I'm just I'm a messed up piece of shit i would've just wasted your time and energy."

"Well then you're my messed up piece of shit, whom i get to take care of because i want nothing but only you. And i totally wanna waste my time with you."

"I'm sorry."

"You don't have to be, Its all good now"

You took a deep breath. Nothing is gonna change the fact that you hurt him, but he was wise enough to know you weren't intentionally trying to. Love. "I don't know what else to say but i love you"

"And that's more than enough babe."

"Ba-be?"

"I've been dying to call you that you know?"

"Why are you so good to me?" He just shrugs and ruffles your hair. "Wanna complete watching that movie together?" You sigh in relief nodding your head a big yes.

You thought he was taking you to watch a movie, but it was a whole different scene the moment you entered his apartment. He changed the lights. They are a warm shade of yellow now. He did put the movie on, but you weren't paying any attention to it. Your head was hurting because of the sudden attack you had at the party, so he insisted on sleeping instead. 

You tried sleeping, but the smell of his perfume on the bed kept you awake. makes you reckless. made your thoughts run wild. You remember how it felt the last time you were here, in his apartment. The tension, the dream, the heat, the kiss. Not the fighting part of the whole situation, but the part where you were wholly in love with him. The part where you wanted to take a chance The part where you wanted to give him your all. 

Feeling too overdriven by your train of thoughts, you get out of bed. You follow the noise that was coming from the kitchen to find Yuta making something. "What are you doing at this hour of the night?" You speak softly, standing by the door frame. He looks at you unfazed. "I assumed you were sleeping," I said. "The bedsheets smell like you." You walk behind him slowly, his eyes following your every step. "Quite distracting." 

"If you weren't drunk enough the last time you were here." 

"Then I wouldn't have been here." 

"Fact," he says, nodding."Try it," he says, handing you the cup. He emptied whatever he was making, tea. "Since when did you start drinking tea?" you question, placing the cup down, trying to sit on the counter. He helps you jump. "Since hot chocolate started reminding me of you." 

"I'm sorry," you whisper quietly. 

"You don't have to do it, and you shouldn't waste your time!" He scolds you, taking the empty cup from your hands and placing it in the sink. "I'll say it as long as I need to." 

"Useless "

Then how can I make it up to you? You can only tell. " 

"Endless ways I can think of right now." There was a sudden change in the way he spoke. The hoarseness in his voice lingered in the air and warmth creeped into his eyes. The coldness in the air was replaced by this heavy heat of want that was engulfing you and him alive. "Like?" 

Keeping your voice at a hearable volume, you make space between your legs by separating them, which was taken by him the very next second, "like finishing what we started." " You know what's coming next." The movie? " You put on the most innocent face you ever had in your life, looking him directly in the eyes, playing with him like he plays with you. "Now now, what a disappointment you are," he says while tapping your cheek with his index finger. Biting your lower lip, you say, "Someone used to call me dumb..." 

"You're playing the wrong game, babe." He warns, tracing your jaw line and down your neck. He then lines your clavicle up and down, "You're gonna lose." He takes both his hands behind your back, pulling you closer with a jerk. His face was only inches away now, his lower body already in contact. You could feel him hardening against your pussy. He was this close. 

"What if I want to lose?" You answer, your voice barely above a whisper, the taste of the tea still in your mouth, sweet, but you want his taste now. He chuckles lowly, his lips brushing against yours as he speaks, his voice firm and demanding, unlike yours. "Well then, wait for me in the bedroom." 

It was new and exciting to get to see this side of him. Unlike his normal caring and soft self, this Yuta knew what he wanted. He is precious and just, and he needs no explanation for anything he does. "Oh and babe, undies off but keep my t-shirt on." You follow his command, going straight to the bedroom and removing your underwear and tossing it aside. 

You wait in anticipation, but don't quite know what to do. You were pacing around the room like a mouse chased by a cat. Butterflies in your stomach won't quiet down. The mere thought of what might happen causes goosebumps on your skin.Sitting at the edge of the bed, you check the time. It's 12:30 in the morning and that's when he enters. 

All of them changed. His demeanour was that of a wolf out on a hunt. And you were his prey. He shut the door behind him. His eyes were darker and his skin appeared a little bit colder than before. It's not like there's a third person but. You get up on your feet and just stand there in the middle of the room, a thousand thoughts in your mind playing every possible scenario that could happen. He drags a chair by its arm, situating it just in front of you, and sits down on it like a king. 

"Come ahead!" he orders. You start walking in an instant, almost tripping. His voice alone makes your insides curl and your pussy clench around nothing. Wetness is leaking down. 

"You really want to go down this road?" Changing his expression suddenly, his eyes glistened with a golden tint, probably because of the light coming in from the window. You try to play along, "Aren't we already down?" He smiles. "You can stop me anytime you don't feel comfortable, okay?" You nod, melting into his softness. How can this person do it? switching between personalities in mere seconds. 

"I doubt I'll stop you." You push a strand of your hair behind your ear, getting a little closer so your legs touch the chair. His legs were separated, and you were in the middle. The only source of light in the room was the street light, perfectly lighting up his face and your body. He lifts an eyebrow at what you just said, sitting upright in his chair. "Confident much? I like that. It won't be for too long though. " You shiver when his hands rub your outer thigh. He was waiting for a reply from you, but he was correct. The moment his hands touched your bare skin, all the confidence you were mustering up to talk back was thrown out of the window. His hands travel south and leave your skin hot, high, and dry. 

You gasp at the loss of contact. Being touched by someone, by him after so many years, you don't think you can last in this game for even a minute. 

"Let's begin, shall we?" 

You manage an "uhhm..." as you brace yourself for whatever he's about to do. He relaxes in his chair. With his eyebrows lifting up and down, he asks you to sit on the bed with a simple but powerful command. "Sit." 

You sit at the edge of the bed, your legs shut tight, your hands sweaty, and your mouth dry. 

"Let me see you." You didn't quite hear him, but you heard him. It was just so shockingly sudden. 

"Huh?" you stutter under his strong gaze. 

"Lost already." He deadpanned. He was mocking you, and he knows it's affected you. "Spread your legs, sweetheart." 

On his command, your agape mouth was shut, your legs already following his order, deciding to move on their own as your mind had given up on thinking ages ago. 

The show hasn't even started yet, and he's enjoying himself watching your timidity in every move you make. "No, actually, shift a little back. Make yourself comfortable." He gets up and shifts his chair forward as you move back on the bed. He got a glimpse of your core while you were shifting. You know he did because you saw the expression change on his face. Right there in that split second, you saw him almost lose and regain his composure.

Not letting him speak again, you spread your legs wide and open. The loose t-shirt that was covering you shifts up automatically, leaving you uncovered for him to devour you with his eyes alone. You looked at him and he looked at your core, shamelessly. This somehow gave you some kind of power over him. He is too weak for you. He curses under his breath, closing his eyes and breathing deeply but fast. 

The moment he opened his eyes and met yours, your soul definitely left your body. Your breath hitched, and you tried to look away from him, but his gaze was so hard it locked yours. You couldn't. "Touch yourself." You clench at his words, and he sees that. 

"Be more specific." That was bold of you to say that. He almost choked on your words. You may be the shy girl who is affected by small things, but you are also a freak. Although you do want to lose, you'd still give it your best shot. 

He poked his tongue under his cheek, nodding his head in approval of your regained confidence. "Touch your clit with only one finger and don't move it." 

Very precise. You do as he says. There is only one finger on your clit, and there is no movement at all. 

"Tap it." You do, lifting your finger up and keeping it gently on your throbbing clit. You clench again the moment your fingers touch, gasping out silently. "Keep on doing it until I say stop." He bites his lower lip as he watches you enjoy yourself at his command. The fact that you were doing it while he was watching you with his sinful gaze has already got you gripping the sheets and curling your toes. 

You do it slowly, sensually, watching him watch you. He's affected in ways he can't explain and in ways you can't fathom. Feeling good, you take your lower lip between your teeth and close your eyes. You get more comfortable as you fully submit to the task you were given. You let your head hang freely, trying to be more vocal, but letting out soft whimpers only. You didn't want to give him too much just yet. 

"Stop." 

You hiss at him. Drawing in a sharp breath, you bite your lip harshly in agression, not wanting to stop but stopping anyway. You look forward to him, his dilated pupils eyeing you like a scavenger, making you light-headed. "Enjoying yourself too much?" 

You nod slowly, your gaze never leaving his, and it drives him insane. 

Warmth creeps beneath your skin when he gets up from his chair and motions for you to come forward. You get on your knees, the t-shirt covers you again and you crawl to him to the edge of the bed to where he was standing. Sitting on your heels, you watch him loosen his belt. Then he undoes the waist button and unzips his pants. He slides them down, revealing white boxers and his untamed bulge, which he somehow managed to keep inside and hidden. 

You're dizzy by just imagining the size of him. You're unsure of what to do. Should you help him undress himself or should you just sit back and anticipate? Like a lost child, you wait for him to tell you. He asks a question instead. "I suppose you don't know how to give a blow job." Feeling belittled, you shook your head, looking up at him, "perfect." He compliments.

He slid the boxers down, his hard, thick and girthy dixk slapping against his abdomen, now free of any restrictions, standing tall and proud in front of you. You were too busy focusing on his perfection that you failed to keep up. He had already removed his shirt, and was now standing completely naked in front of you for the very first time. It's nerve awakening.

That is when you actually felt the gravity of the situation. It wasn't just some game you were playing; it was actually happening. You and he were actually happening. You fucking confessed to him yesterday! Yuta thought he was going to be angry and not talk to you at all because you broke his heart, but it's the complete opposite situation, he just couldn't be angry at you. Yuta knows better, good for you. He loves you. You love him and all your dreams about him were about to come true, he was going to make you his. 

"Fuck!" You didn't mean to say that out loud.

"Like what you see? I bet you dreamt about me. " It was like you were hypnotised by him or you lost control of yourself. It was like you were high on some drug. Or maybe you were high on him because you weren't thinking before nodding your head when he asked you that question. 

"What was I doing in them?" He takes his cock in his hands and starts palming it. You swear you saw it grow even bigger in size, as if it already wasn't. Too astonished to see the action just inches away from your eyes, you answer, "You were fucking me raw. From behind." You look up and gulp, "And you were spanking me, pulling my hair, kissing me, and marking me yours," you say in a small voice, so shameless, so pure.

"Get up on your knees." You do, inching yourself closer to him; he's still stroking his length in between. You look down, a new angle to admire him. You place your hand on his, your hand moving up and down his shaft with his. He slows down. "Want me to do all those things for you? Want me to touch you? " You looked up, mouth parted and eyes glistening to meet his dark ones. "Want me to pull your hair? want me to kiss you? fuxk you?" 

You nod frantically consumed by your arousal, his voice travelling straight to your untouched, unlooked, un-taken-careof core, your wetness literally sliding down your thigh. It's hurtful. 

"Oh baby, don't be that cute or I'll just have to fuck you right now." He says this restlessly before connecting his lips with yours. You let out a sigh of relief before giving into him. It was kind of the first physical contact he made after getting in this room, which has been nothing but hard for him to keep his hands away from you. He deepens the kiss. Tilting your face to the left, he locks his fingers in your hair, pulling them. The kiss was sloppy and messed up and just perfect, laced with desire and lust in every bit of it. Your tongues collided, your teeth clashed; you both just couldn't get enough of each other. Your hands rested on his neck, gripping tightly for support. He bites your lower lip making you gasp, then sucks it like candy. 

You reciprocate his every move. You try to, but you are getting out of breath. His hands travel down your back, lifting the t-shirt up and gripping your ass, squeezing it hard. You say his name aloud, breaking the kiss, "Yuta!" Your forehead rested on his shoulder while he kissed and nipped at your ear while kneading you, "Yes baby, you like it?" You hum in response, lifting your head up and looking at him, holding him close. "Rub your clit for me, baby." 

You bite your lower lip, lowering your hands and legs, your gaze never leaving his. You rub yourself up and down and in circles. He can't really see, but he knows. It makes his dick twitch. You let out a loud, breathy, dragged out moan, setting up a pace, "mhmmm shit."

He mimics that moan, his eyes burning with desire and lust. "Mhmmm shit... Nice and slow, yea baby, so good for me." You let out another breathy moan, closing your eyes but quietly this time, not wanting him to mock you again. 

His finger was placed on yours, on the one that was rubbing circles on your clit. You jump, in shock or excitement, you don't know. Your brain seizes the movement of your finger completely, "Why did you stop?" he takes over. His fingers move up and down, making yours move as well. Resting his forehead on yours, he continues to play with you, making you whimper with every flick. 

He moves your hands aside, your face contouring in pleasure when his fingers touch you, bare and raw, with nothing in between. There were chills running down your lower back, your stomach tightening with the pleasure he was delivering. Slowing down a little, he collects your wetness in his fingers, bringing it to your mouth to suck on it. You lick it first, then swirl your tongue around it, and then take it in completely, sucking like a lollipop. 

You kiss him with your flavour in your mouth. His hands find their way back between your legs, rubbing your clit, up and down and sideways, the wetness making his movements sloppy, his fingers gliding frictionless on your sweet swollen nub. His finger circles your opening before carefully dipping it inside of you. You purr in his ear while his lips ghost over the exposed skin of your neck. His breath hits you every time he exhales, absolutely burning your skin to a hot red. You clench around his finger, not letting it escape. Well, you finally have something to clench around this time. He stays inside of you for awhile. 

"Rub yourself again." And in no time, you're following his words, bringing your right hand to circle your clit. Now desperate to release, you don't go for slow motion but rather set a high pace. 

"Slow it down." 

You might be in disagreement looking at him but he gives you one look and you're slowing your fingers down. He pulls his finger out just to push it in again, and again, and again. You try to match your movements with his, setting a slow rhythm. You go up every time he pushes in, and that's how he drives you to your first orgasm of the night.

You've been at the edge for so long, you're coming undone with only one finger. You stop circling yourself and hold him to keep yourself up while his fingers are still working you up, slow and steady, riding you through it and pushing you into the beginning of the next one. 

His finger was buried up to his knucles, deep in you. He places his palm flat against your mound. You press into his touch. Moving your hips to grind into his hand, breathing harshly, he supports your body and whispers praises in your ear about how good you are and the amazing job you're doing. Just when you thought you could cum again, he makes you stop and removes his hand from between your legs. 

Licking his finger clean, he asks you to get on your hands and knees, "face down ass up, fast!" he said while pumping himself. The site of his hardened veiny dick was hard to look at. It was begging for your attention, but you weren't really confident with that. Instead of following his order, you stare at him palming himself. You look at him with a question written in your eyes. He understands what you're asking for but doesn't really acknowledge it. "Please." You kneel in front of him. He rolls his eyes, but gives you a look of content. 

"My girl wants a taste." 

You smile when he calls you his girl, "Yes. Your girl wants a taste." emphasis on the, "your girl." 

When you bring your face closer and look up at him, ready to take him in, he curses under his breath, holding your head in place with his hands clenching your hair in a fist, in the softest manner. "Open your mouth." You do, also giving a little extra you stick your tongue out for him.

He places the tip of his dick on your tongue, gently sliding it in against the surface. You close your lips around it. He slides further deep into your mouth, controlling himself to not push in too deep. Very slowly, he draws it out, leaving you empty and wanting more of him. He lets you take a taste, though. Slithering against your tongue in swift motions.

You swirl your tongue around his tip, which is already leaking. You try to take him deeper but his grip won't let you he only fucks his tip in. Finally bringing up the courage to take him into your small hands, you wrap your hand around the base of it, applying slight pleasure, moving your hand up and down his shaft. 

"Just like that." His voice boosts your confidence. He lets you play with him with your innocent little hands which are like a tease to him, until he can't take it anymore. Seeing you determined, his grip on your hair tightens and with his other hand, he moves your hands aside. He yanks your head back. "Open wider" He growls, as you do. And he slams his cock deeper than before. The sounds you produce are embarrassing. He goes deeper, causing you to gag, your heartbeat fastening even more all of a sudden. You mumble protest, telling him to remove himself and wrap your hand around his wrist, taking a hold of it. He withdraws himself, you cough a little, breathing deeply, then open your mouth again to take him in. He grins, "Now that's my baby!" tightening his fist around your hair and pulling your head a little more up. 

He slides his dick down again, slowly and gently going deeper. He wasn't even going deep to be honest; he was just at the brim, yet your mouth was full of him. Hair messed up and eyes watery, swollen lips wrapped around his girthy member, saliva trailing down your neck, only acting as a lubricant. When he finally siezes his dick after seeing your tousled state and didn't want to cum just yet, you try to regain your breath. Holding your hair back, not pulling anymore, rather soothing your nerves down. Wiping a tear away, he devours your glistening lips with his, not taking any time to deepen it. Pushing you down on the bed, he hovers over you, keeping his knee in between your legs, very very close to your aching to be touched core. His lips leave yours, connecting to your still aching jaw. He leaves a warm wet trail of kisses down your neck and everywhere in between. Sloppy kisses were placed along your clavicle, purposely sucking and leaving red marks around, making you hiss in pain and take his name. 

His hands roam up and down your body, making sure there isn't a single inch left to be touched and explored by him. His hand stretched the tee you were wearing, revealing only the upper part of your breast. He kitten licks the area, then bites the flesh and soothes it with a kiss, making every part of your body his, messed up, burning hot and so beautiful. 

His lips go south, taking your hardened nipple in his mouth and sucking on it through the thin fabric of the tee. While playing with the other, Your lower body automatically starts grinding on his knee, trying to obtain some friction, but it seems to be not working, but you swear the amount of heat dissipating from just the mere contact was enough to melt gold and silver. 

He is too intoxicated just by the way you feel against his lips. He brings himself back to reality to perform the second main job. He gets off the bed only to sink down on his knees in front of you. His face only a few licks away from your heat, you move closer to his mouth. He separates your legs further away, only able to look at you in full bloom this once. Drunk already, he dives in for a sip, and he is not disappointed. A long lick from the bottom of your warmth till up to your clitoris got your toes curling. While he laps at your juices, you curse his name a hundred times. He flicks your clit with his tongue, then sinks it as deep as it can go into you while nuzzling his nose to brush against your clit, it's a perfect blend to which he adds his fingers, the middle one he pushes in first. Out he comes to push it in 2 knuckles deep and then finally sink it deeper, curling it inside, making you roll your eyes back in pure bliss. You're feeling extremely. He adds another finger. That hurts a little but is soon replaced with pleasure. He works you up to your second orgasm, but doesn't let you cum just yet. 

His hands leave your body at once, and you hold back a moan, trying not to sound desperate. His figure walks across the room where he must have kept his wallet. 

You hear a wrapper being torn, goosebumps crawl up on your skin. He takes no time to return. "Make room for me." He gets on the bed, splitting your legs wider. He lets you rest in a comfortable position, keeping a pillow under your head. He drags his fingers between your folds, collecting your juices and spreading them on his member. You look up at the ceiling, aftain, excited, impatient. The yellow lights are forming abstract patterns on the wall. You feel his tip at your entrance, and soon he pushes it in with optimum pressure. You contract your muscles and your eyes shut tightly at the feeling. It's one of pain and fear and not pleasure. "Yuta, it hurts." You breathe out and call his name, your hands trying to grab his shoulders. He pushes in further, rather slowly this time while towering over you and coming face to-face, "Good." 

You lift your hips up a little to ease out the passage, and he bottoms out. He stays like that for a minute. No words were exchanged, just the feelings being felt. His breaths are uneven matching with yours. He connects your foreheads together. You don't know if his eyes are closed or open. They're closed. You inhale him in as he exhales you. 

"Fuck," he growls just before abruptly slamming into you, "Fuck." 

And then it continues, and it hurts no more. He's fucking you hard and slow, going deep and deeper. Making you cry out every time he hits that spot. His voice is husky and low, sending shivers dancing up and down your body. You whimper under him. Your sounds, mixed with the slickness of your bodies crashing into each other, were playing on repeat; warmth and lust in the shade of red were decorating the room, and the orange glitched tint was illuminating the perfect parts of him and you. 

He goes from a painfully slow to a pleasurably fast pace, no mercy he was showing, abusing your little cunt with his big thick dick, driving all the pleasure out for himself as he should, while giving you exactly what you wanted. So good. It feels so good to finally have him inside you, using you, destroying you to only mend you as whole, as his. 

He's fucks you so right.

He lifts his body up a little, supported by his hands over you, looking at your contoured face. He slaps your cheek playfully in an attempt to get you to open your eyes and look at him while he fuxks the shit out of you. He grabs your hands and pins them behind your head. Oh, he knows you are going to come, but it doesn't make him stop or slow down. He continues fuxking you harder and harder until you come undone under him. Your body convulses. Waves of pleasure travel through your nerves, hitting your brain. Your vision go black and, for a brief moment, you lose complete sense of reality, being in a state of complete euphoria. You've never had an orgasm like this before.

And the best part of it all is that he doesn't stop. 

He's drilling in and out of you at a monsteric pace. Your body writhes under him, trying to squirm its way out of his grip, but all these go in vain when his fingers wrap around your dainty neck, applying only the right amount of pressure to hold you down and keep your body fixed in its place. 

When he loses control, his merciless pace becomes even more merciless, banging his head hard, fast, and deep all at once. His thrusts became sloppy and rushed. Chasing after his high, he goes feral. You watch him clench his jaw in pleasure, the sweat rolling down making his hair stick to his skin, his low grunts and humming sound. He's trying to contain himself. What a sight. It makes you want to cum again. 

The pleasure starts building at the pit of your stomach again. You wrap both your hands around his hand, the one that was choking you, while rocking your hips back and forth, trying to match him, looking into his eyes, speaking with an unspoken language. 

And that's how he fuckls you into believing that you are enough, for him and for yourself. That you are capable of being loved and taken care of. That even if you're messy and stupid and dumb, you're still perfect. That you can let go and you can trust. That you can be.

Be his.

And then he explodes inside of you. He couldn't be more grateful, couldn't be more precise in saying that his wait was worth it. You were worth it. He rubs you into your third orgasm. And after that, nothing was like it was before. 

All of you changed. 

All of you changed when he kissed you and told you that he loved you so much. All of you changed when you saw him clean you up in the after hours. All of you changed when he fell asleep beside you, taking you into his arms. 

All of you changed when you met him for the first time.

______

did not proof read, but hope u liked it, The constructive criticism is accepted here, do leave a follow ~

[ilovescaredysquirrel2]

Someone PLEASE make an English Dub of Buratino's Return (obscure Russian movie)

Okay, so I heard about this Russian cartoon animated movie recently, and it's got this Wild Thorberries-Rugrats-ish art style and the songs slap! The one that's gotten really popular was the one with the singing Barbie dolls, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G2CSmp02Emk in this video here (turn the captions on). I heard the name of the movie is actually Возвращение Буратино which translates to Buratino's Return apparently. It looks amazing! I love talking toy themed movies that are NOT Toy Story. It doesn't look as amazing as Raggedy Ann & Andy Musical Adventure but it looks good enough to watch and enjoy. The thing is, the subtitles on the original Russian movie, the English subtitles SUCK! I got them saying weird things like "Oh yeah Obama" when she was apologizing to the other doll, and apparently the dog's name translates to "Potatoes" which... is actually kinda cute not gonna lie! If the movie gets dubbed, they should keep it!

Yeah, so the whole "dubs vs subs" thing is ridiculous. Dubs are obviously way easier to watch and understand. If you're hearing impaired and need subtitles, that's one thing but if you're not and you want to watch a movie, it's way easier to watch a dub. Plus, subtitles aren't always accurate and sometimes make things sound more awkward. Like, the dubbed versions often make more sense. Plus, subtitles go fast and you can't always pay attention to little details if you're watching it with subtitles, it's too distracting. I wholeheartedly believe that dubs are better all the way! If you don't speak English or Russian, maybe it can be dubbed in your language too! There needs to be a Spanish dub, French dub, Japanese dub, whatever language you might speak! The only language I speak is English, so that's why I'm trying to get someone to make an English dub. By the way, the English captions for the Мой Портрет - Трафарет video were an exact translation, I feel like the dub would change it up.

My friend wondered about the songs being ruined in the dub, which I would be worried about too, but they could hire a translator and songwriter to work together and make the lyrics make sense but also rhyme. Even if it was a fan dub, they could still get enough permission and help to make it a good dub without ruining the songs.

Another thing, let's talk about this not being popular in Russia, where it was made. I mean, it came out in 2013, the same year as Disney's Frozen! It didn't stand a freaking chance in theaters! Frozen literally took the world by storm... a snowstorm, that is! (haha, funny joke). Plus, a lot of non-English spoken movies don't get an English dub until years later. 2013 was 11 years ago, but who said it's too late for an English dub. Especially, now that the Barbie doll stencil song is becoming popular online. I also haven't actually seen the full movie, I just skimmed through it on YouTube to get a grip of what it's about and apparently it's about talking toys but they have to escape from a bad guy who wants to destroy them and turn them into the same "evil" toys to create a bad future of children. I also found out that apparently Buratino is Pinocchio and I like the idea of a non-Disney Pinocchio movie, because Pinocchio has been around for like 150 years, way before Disney made it into a creepy a** animated movie and they shouldn't take copyright of Pinocchio. There's also that other Russian movie "Pinocchio a True Story" where Pauly Shore voices Pinocchio and Tom Kenny voiced Geppetto. Also, this movie Buratino's Return was animated in 2D form, when a lot of early 2010s movies were 3D. I'm not sure how that effected the marketing and who wanted to see it but I'm almost sure that a lot of people were more hyped about Frozen or other popular movies.

Here's something else I found, apparently it was also based off "The Adventures of Buratino" which is a really old story, and I think this 2013 movie kind of looks like a creative twist on that story, kind of like what Disney does, but also kind of makes fun of Disney as well. Basically it looks like they're basing a story off old fairytales Pinocchio and The Adventures of Buratino, just as Disney does, except they're changing the things about Disney that isn't woke and making fun of the things that are wrong with Disney. I know a lot of you probably hate it when I talk crap about Disney, but I always give my side of how I feel and let you have your side. With enough convincing and understanding, hopefully we can understand both sides!

Anyway, feel free to chat with me about this in the comments! I'm always happy to hear opinions, even if they're different from mine. SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS!

[bleaksqueak]

Do you have voices in mind for each of your characters? Like an existing actor or singer they would sound close to? Or more so basic tones and timbre, or slight accents?

Yes! Well, sort of-- I can hear each and every one of their voices so clearly, but I have a hard time pointing to any known celebrities/voice actors that match them. I'm sure they exist and I'm sure I've probably even heard them, but it might be a case where they became a mishmash in my head to fit the tone that I hear for them. And like, with Maia, the absolute closest I can say is something obscure like "It's kind of like if Flute spoke english" (not a fan of the voh anime, but the voice castings were all great, so Flute's voice actress pops into my head with Maia... it's not exact, but it's close). She's got a soft, lightly airy voice that might have a singsong quality to it if not for her rampant anxiety and depression. bummer. Definitely ratchets up higher and higher until cracking like a cat under duress when her anxiety reaches (yelling at Elias levels) In my head, Audric has a deep, somewhat stern voice. Imposing if you don't know him well, definitely reads as "The Adult in the Room"... but still markedly young when he relaxes and you listen with familiarity. To contrast that, he's absolutely the type that breaks into something more like a childish laugh/giggle when amused to the point he can't keep it in. Like a dam break, it'll come out as a biting little laugh, probabyl hidden behind a hand. Largely I think this sticks in my mind for him due to one of my friends who's much the same way. For some reason i can't thnk of a single character to point to "kind of like--". Thanatos from Hades is a better fit below but the timbre/way of speaking is close, it just isn't severe/deep enough. Elias has a similar voice but lighter and without any of the strictness. His tone drags a little, giving off a feeling of someone who's studying you or the situation actively while they're speaking--almost as if plotting. This ranges from a seriousness that most find either offputting or unfriendly, to a more playful version of it (much of what he's been speaking to Maia with for the past chapter). The closest thing i can think of is like Maia where it's not quite right but it's close, which would be V's english VA from devil may cry... maybe V mixed with Thanatos from Hades and Ishida Akira when doing an older/serious role. Elias doesn't sound as actively sinister or [you know, dying lmao] as V though, making it not a full proper fit. The very "^_^" nature of a lot of Ishida Akira's performances though do fit well, even if they're largely missing the right actual timbre, and the casual-hard-to-read of Thanatos fits well. So I guess just mix these three together and it should somewhat sound like how I hear him in my head. Lyra's voice is very Mature but Spunky, and you should know she absolutely would do the full on "nerd laugh" if something gets her particularly good. Persephone's voice actor from Hades has the right timbre, but the performance doesn't match. If spiderverse dock ock were younger and , you know, genuinely more hyper that would fit more the right performance... But, yes. lol Nothing truly matches, but those get close like with the above examples. The fox is easy!! finally an easy one!!

and you know, for the gyekexplosion

And I lied okay, Audun is the ONE CHARACTER I know exactly who/what performance he sounds like that I could point to, but I think I might go to my grave before saying it because i'm oddly embarrassed by it lmao. Look, sometimes you just hear a performance and do a double take and go "THAT'S MY GUY...!?!?!" and your jaw is on the ground because someone captured it so exact that it feels like they crawled into your head and took notes. He has a deep, very "fatherly" voice, a bit stilted in nature but calm more often than not.If you want to attribute the stilted nature to a faint accent, thinking about what he's saying, or making sure he is understood clearly due to the nature of his work, that is up to you. It's the type of voice that can easily still a room if raised, but that's rarely necessary outside of extreme emergencies.

[beevean]

I'm still reeling from that shit take about dubbing. In that case I guess every single Japanese person better learn perfect English(which has different dialects and forms, like Japanese) or they better stop dubbing media outside of their country. I prefer to watch things subbed, even beyond anime. But reading subs can be a damn chore sometime. When Sailor Moon Eternal(a two part movie) was finally released here, I just said fuck it and watched it dubbed because I wanted a more leisurely viewing.

My man shamelessly doubled down, insisted that he was talking about every language, and even lowkey called someone racist for assuming he was talking about English and Japanese

(funnily enough, Colony pointed out a case of Star Wars being dubbed in Diné, and the project taking 16 years. Is preserving an endangered language xenophobic too, my dude? :) )

This is the closest thing to an explanation I found

But... this doesn't mean that dubbing is "morally corrupt", like he lovingly put it. This is an issue with people he's having, not with the practice. So his idea is to get rid of dubs to force people to hear another language? What?

(also, his snide remark of "I wouldn't want to get in a car with you if you can't read fast enough" is just as ableist as him accusing others of using disabled people as a shield)

Oh, and this is even better:

Why in the sheer fuck are you assuming that people who use dubs hate the original actors???????

Okay, I'm going to use a very rare example of an Italian product dubbed into English: Tear Along the Dotted Line. In the original version, the voice acting is made entirely by one person, the author, speaking in a heavy Roman accent.

It's funny, it gives color to the product (and even then, I know some people complained that they couldn't understand what he was saying, so even in Italy it was a mildly controversial choice). In English... they just used a generic British accent, which has completely opposite connotations to the Roman accent. I'm also sure they removed most of the swearing.

I don't like this dub, it's nowhere near as iconic as the original. Personally, they should have picked another accent at the very least. However. I would not insult any non-Italian speaker who decided to watch the dub nonetheless. If you don't understand the inherent connotations of a Roman accent, you're not going to find it as funny, it's only natural. Even if they tried to use subs only, some Roman expressions would inevitably be butchered, and again, the translation would suffer from it. And this is not even mentioning all the cultural references in the show! Translating is hard! Dubbing is hard! And Fonseca is just a giant aggressive asshole at this point!

[haljathefangirlcat]

Sigfrido, 1958

Also know as Sigfrido, La leggenda dei Nibelunghi... or, that time we went a little Fritz Lang.

Like Lang's Siegfried and Kriemhilds Rache, this Italian movie by Giacomo Gentilomo (starring Sebastian Fischer as Siegfried, Ilaria Occhini as Kriemhild, Rolf Tasna as Hagen, Giorgio Costantini as Gunther, and Katharina Mayberg as Brunhild) tells the story of Siegfried and the Nibelungs. It draws its main inspiration from the Nibelungenlied, but also includes elements from Wagner's The Ring of the Nibelung, as well as musical pieces and themes "freely adapted and elaborated" (as the credit sequence says) from the operas Siegfried and Götterdämmerung specifically. And, since it has been adapted into English under the title The Dragon's Blood but I really doubt you'd find that version as easily online and/or free, I've decided to translate its dialogues from Italian into English.

Only its dialogues, though. Writing down each scene with all of its dialogue, action, and setting would have taken a lot more time and effort, and this was already difficult enough without a script on hand. This translation is meant less as a substitute for watching the movie and more as something to keep around to understand what exactly is going on while watching it. Kinda like subtitles... except I don't actually know how to upload a movie with subtitles, lol. (Jokes aside, do watch the entire movie: the last scene doesn't have any dialogue so it didn't even make it into this post, and the one right before doesn't spend much time explaining what's happening on screen, either.)

Also, please note: the audio in the video I linked kind of... hiccups, sometimes. Mostly I had no trouble reconstructing the incomplete lines or the ones that were just difficult to hear, but sometimes I did have to guess. There's also a few places where I had to just give up and say "okay, I honestly have no idea who this character is supposed to be", because their name just wasn't said on-screen even once. Hell, even with Giselher and Gernot, I only figured out who was who when their names were finally spoken around... say, almost an hour into the movie?

I also want to point out that Gernot's name is rendered in the movie as Gerenot, but I stuck to the form I'm more familiar with because... well, I am pretty sure it's only said out loud once, anyway. A Danwarth is also mentioned in the opening credits, but as I have literally no idea who he was supposed to be, there's was even less of a question if I should keep his name like that or render it as Dankwart.

Anyway, here goes the actual translation!

OPENING QUOTE: Human life, in the exaltation of myth, becomes almost divine.

SIEGLINDE: Help! Help! SIEGLINDE: Please… take care of my baby. Siegfried. Please… SIEGLINDE: His father, Siegmund, died as a valiant man. This was his sword.

SIEGFRIED: Hoioh!

SIEGFRIED: Hoioh! MIME: No! No, no, no, no! No! Send that ugly beast away! Send it away! SIEGFRIED: Eat him! Eat this ugly smith who can't even make me a sword! Eat him! MIME: Away! Send it away, send it away… I made you the most beautiful sword in the world! Look! SIEGFRIED: Shoo, Brownie! Out! [He calls the bear "Bruno", which is a name but literally means brown/dark/tan and can be used to talk about hair, complexion, fur, etc…. also, "orso bruno" literally means brown bear] SIEGFRIED: And this, according to you, was the most beautiful sword in the world!? Lying braggart! MIME: Why do you treat me this way? Is this the gratitude a father is owed? SIEGFRIED: You, my father? Have you ever tried looking at yourself in the water of the stream? Could the sheep ever beget the bear? The serpent, the boar? Why do you keep hiding the truth from me!? You must tell me who is my father! MIME: Let me go! You're hurting me! If you grab me like that, how can I speak? SIEGFRIED: And don't tell me again that I am your son… MIME: No! It's true, you're not my son. Your mother entrusted you to me when she was on the brink of death. She was wounded, she passed away on the snow. SIEGFRIED: And my father? MIME: I don't know. But he was a valiant warrior… Siegmund was his name. SIEGFRIED: Can you give me any proof of this? MIME: Yes! MIME: I got this from your mother, and it was my only reward. SIEGFRIED: My father's sword… The sword of Siegmund. This will be my sword! Quick, stoke the fire! MIME: Yes, yes… SIEGFRIED: I will melt the two pieces and make a new blade out of them!

MIME: Go away, you spy! You're always buzzing around my smithy. ALBERICH: Is this how you treat your little brother? My advice is always precious… gold! MIME: I don't need it! ALBERICH: Don't you like gold, Mime? Not even that of the Nibelungs? MIME: I'm not interested! ALBERICH: You think me as naive as Siegfried!? But I can read your thoughts through the bones of your skull! MIME: What do you mean? ALBERICH: You made of the little lamb a nice lion, strong and sturdy, so that it may prevail on the dragon that guards the treasure. Mime, the Nibelungs' gold is so, so much! There's enough for both of us. I can help you carry it… MIME: Carry it away from me! Glutton! Traitor! Go away! ALBERICH: And you believe Siegfried won't betray you? MIME: He knows nothing, and nothing will he dare! ALBERICH: But when he knows… listen to me, there is a poison… SIEGFRIED: Mime! MIME: Go away! Go away, we'll talk about it another time! Go away! Go away!

SIEGFRIED: Mime! Look! Look. Here is my sword, finally. SIEGFRIED: Did you see that? It's with this sword that I'll conquer the world and face the dragon you've been telling me about ever since I was a child! MIME: Don't you feel fear? SIEGFRIED: Fear? Why don't you teach it to me? MIME: I can't, but the dragon… the dragon will teach it to you. Kill it and you'll know. SIEGFRIED: It will really be child's play. MIME: The dragon is horrible, enormous, stronger than a hundred bears… SIEGFRIED: And I wish they were a hundred thousand. Teach me the way. MIME: It's two days and nights beyond the forest, till the wood of the green stones…

SIEGFRIED: Are you trying to tell me something? SIEGFRIED: Come on. SIEGFRIED: Whoever bathes in the dragon's blood becomes invulnerable.

MIME: I didn't think you capable of doing something like this! Refresh yourself now, you're tired. Drink! MIME: Stop, you thief! MIME: Stop! Stop! Stop! The treasure belongs to me! ALBERICH: The poison was my idea! MIME: And who brought it? Me! MIME: No! No! Noo! ALBERICH: No! No! Mercy! Mercy, Siegfried! I didn't know anything, don't hurt me… let me live! I will turn you into the richest man in the world. In the cave there is the treasure of the Nibelungs, the most fabulous treasure on Earth… stop! I'm your friend! With the treasure, you'll be able to win the heart of Kriemhild, the woman anyone would want to be his. Come. Come! ALBERICH: Come…

SIEGFRIED: You damned monster. Where is the treasure you were talking about!? ALBERICH: Wait. ALBERICH: Put this ring on your finger and you'll see. ALBERICH: Only he who possesses the ring is the master of the treasure.

SIEGFRIED: You, too, are made of the same putrid flesh as your brother. ALBERICH: No! Don't kill me. I will be your slave. SIEGFRIED: If you want me to spare your life, you must tell me who is Kriemhild. ALBERICH: She's king Gunther's sister. SIEGFRIED: A king's sister. ALBERICH: But she'll be yours, because you're more than a king! SIEGFRIED: Not yet, but I will be! The road that separates me from her will be littered with my victories, and the sovereign of every kingdom I'll pass through will be my vassal! Tell me, where is Kriemhild? ALBERICH: In the castle of Worms, on the Rhine, in the land of the Burgundians.

ALBERICH: Go… do go! The enchanted gold thirsts for blood!

GERNOT: Did you see? This time, too, Hagen is the winner. HAGEN: To you, Kriemhild. May I be permitted to give you another token of my devotion. KRIEMHILD: Hagen is truly invincible. I understand why my brother, the king, holds him in such esteem. UTE: And you don't? KRIEMHILD: So do I. UTE: But you wouldn't marry him. KRIEMHILD: Please, mother mine! I've often heard it said that love gives brief joy and long suffering. And from you I learned that when you lose it, the pain is endless. UTE: What are you saying, daughter? All the tears I shed were compensated for in advance by the first kiss I had from your father. KRIEMHILD: I will never marry. It is much better to not have than to lose.

RUMOLD: No one else among these noble knights wants to measure himself against Hagen of Tronje?

SIEGFRIED: I salute you, Gunther, king of the Burgundians! GUNTHER: Who are you, who come all of a sudden to my royal keep? SIEGFRIED: My name is Siegfried, son of Siegmund. I bring with me twelve kings I defeated and made my vassals. GUNTHER: What do you ask for? SIEGFRIED: To fight against the most valiant of the Burgundians and offer you my sword. HAGEN: Go back from whence you came from, stranger, if you don't want to lose what you've conquered. SIEGFRIED: I'll put up as a prize my twelve kingdoms for the privilege of your hospitality, king Gunther. GUNTHER: Be then welcome at my court. You will find in Hagen of Tronje a worthy opponent. HAGEN: Have you already had your fill of your days, you intrepid knight, who put your life in peril? SIEGFRIED: Life? So be it.

UTE: Why do you draw away and blush? KRIEMHILD: Since when is it a custom at our court to welcome strangers? UTE: Why do you get angry? KRIEMHILD: In the yard there is an insolent, arrogant one who stares at me with his indiscreet gaze. UTE: He really is insolent. He's still looking. UTE: And he sure isn't looking at me.

KRIEMHILD: What's happening down there? Why do you laugh? UTE: The stranger did wrong in measuring himself against Hagen. Old as I am, I'd be stronger than him. KRIEMHILD: Yet when he came in on his horse… UTE: Eeh, the horse can hold its own, yes, but the knight will only see victory in his dreams.

UTE: Now Hagen will give him the final blow! UTE: Oh! UTE: I can't believe my eyes, it's the first time Hagen gets disarmed. KRIEMHILD: Wait till the end.

GUNTHER: Stop, Siegfried! GUNTHER: I proclaim you the winner. SIEGFRIED: I would have never wet my sword in the blood of a Burgundian. I only ask for your friendship.

UTE: Insolent, perhaps, but not arrogant. He's a valiant one. KRIEMHILD: What do I care for my brother's guests? It's enough that I can avoid them. UTE: And you better! That one has a wife and children. KRIEMHILD: You know him!? UTE: Of course. KRIEMHILD: Who is he, then? UTE: I don't know. But now, I know you.

GERNOT: Our hero seems tired. Or maybe he gets bored at the court of the Burgundians? GISELHER: He sure is more charismatic when he fights. GERNOT: Or is it Volker's music that bores him? GISELHER: Do you prefer more cheerful music? SIEGFRIED: Oh, no. GUNTHER: And what says our Hagen? GERNOT: Oh, Hagen would like music from instruments made of the enemy's guts. GUNTHER: Volker! Don't you have any music that may cheer up our guest? GISELHER: It's not this, brother, that may cheer up Siegfried. Something else is needed. GUNTHER: Am I perhaps guilty of forgetting something? GISELHER: An old habit. Remember the saying… ?: A feast without women is like a sky without stars. GUNTHER: Forgive me, Siegfried. This used to be a good habit of our court. But I don't have a queen. ?: That depends only on you, king Gunther. What are you waiting for? ?: You only need to choose. Every woman would aspire to be at your side. GUNTHER: But not the one I'd like. SIEGFRIED: So there is one. Who wounded your heart, king Gunther? GUNTHER: Brunhild. SIEGFRIED: The queen of Iceland. What name came out of your lips! Forget her. GUNTHER: Is she not worthy? SIEGFRIED: Oh, yes. Her fame has already crossed the borders of every kingdom, but in her veins runs liquid iron, not blood. GERNOT: She will only belong to one who will be capable of taming her. ?: And you would not be able to resist her in the field. GISELHER: If you lose, she'll kill you, brother! She's strong and fierce in the fight. ?: Many kings tried, and now the ground of Iceland covers them. ?: Her heart is made of bronze. GUNTHER: But her face is peerless in beauty. SIEGFRIED: She is as ruthless as lightning. GUNTHER: A thousand times, death by her hands, rather than live a hundred years with this feeling of impotence and shame. SIEGFRIED: Is it shame, if the embers burn you and the blade cuts you? Give up, Gunther! HAGEN: And this is your advice, intrepid hero? You, too, feel fear, then. SIEGFRIED: I don't know that word. I didn't tremble with you. HAGEN: And with Brunhild, would you be able to prove your valor? SIEGFRIED: I care nothing for the queen of Iceland. My heart… belongs to another woman.

UTE: Come, Kriemhild. It's now time for us to retire. It's late. KRIEMHILD: No! Not yet, mother. Please. The night with its dreams scares me. UTE: Yours is not the age of scary dreams. KRIEMHILD: Yet every night I see a vicious eagle tear to pieces a falcon of mine, strong and beautiful. What is that dream trying to tell me? HANDMAIDEN: The falcon means a groom. God protect him from the ravening eagle.

GISELHER: Queen, the king orders and begs that you, with your most beautiful dames, would honor him, and soon. There is a noble knight with us. UTE: Your mother is not queen anymore, and she has wilted. GISELHER: To my heart, there is no more beautiful woman. UTE: Boy… tell my son to forgive me, but I'm old and tired. Kriemhild will come in my place to honor the guest. GISELHER: As you wish, mother. KRIEMHILD: I? I, alone? UTE: You, with your handmaidens. KRIEMHILD: Now, and dressed like this? GISELHER: Now, and dressed like this! KRIEMHILD: Oh, no! Gutruna, the emerald brooch, the perfume, and a handkerchief! Rosmunda, the comb, the mirror, and the diadem! GISELHER: Aah, so many things! I'm starting to suspect that… KRIEMHILD: What? … Ah! I pricked my finger. GISELHER: There! That someone pricked you. KRIEMHILD: Oh, there's some blood… GISELHER: Quick, little sister, let's go! The guest wants to see you before you've completely bled out. KRIEMHILD: Ah, yes, let's go! I'm ready.

SIEGFRIED: I confess that, when I came to the castle, I felt a disorientation I couldn't explain. But now… I would never want to climb back on the saddle and leave your court. GISELHER: Here is Kriemhild, Gunther. This is the noble Siegfried. KRIEMHILD: Be welcome. SIEGFRIED: Thank you. GISELHER: This, and nothing else!? Did you lose the ability to talk? GISELHER: And you? Why do you blush? KRIEMHILD: Oh… we have to forgive him. He's a crafty scoundrel, free as a colt that knows not bridles nor whip. GUNTHER: It's up to you, Kriemhild, to offer the prize to the winner of the tournament. SIEGFRIED: Let this be the prize. KRIEMHILD: You don't like my jewel? SIEGFRIED: Jewels are hard, cold stones. But this… KRIEMHILD: But it's stained with blood. SIEGFRIED: Your blood. It makes it more valuable. KRIEMHILD: The embroidery's mine, too.

HAGEN: What do you want? ALBERICH: Your help. We have to get our hands on the Nibelungs' treasure. HAGEN: You're either mad or plotting a betrayal. The treasure is guarded by the dragon. ALBERICH: It was killed. HAGEN: Impossible. Who dared? ALBERICH: Siegfried! HAGEN: Him!? And the treasure!? ALBERICH: It's his. Now he owns the ring. HAGEN: Siegfried… that demon is at Gunther's court. ALBERICH: I know! And that's why I came. HAGEN: The treasure is in his hands… but he is in mine! The Nibelungs' gold will be ours. ALBERICH: It's no easy deed. Siegfried is strong and owns the magical net that turns him invisible. HAGEN: I will kill him! ALBERICH: He's invulnerable! He bathed in the dragon's blood. HAGEN: I was the strongest of the Burgundians… now Siegfried is. I had Kriemhild and he took her from me. Nothing, then, will my hatred be capable of against him!? ALBERICH: If iron can't kill him, other means will be able to. May the fierce beast change its look and, on par with a fox, sharpen its wits.

SIEGFRIED: If I look into your face, every word seems inadequate. Such sweetness, such light in your blue eyes… KRIEMHILD: My mother, perhaps, chose them for me with a wish before I was born, so that they may bring joy to those who came near me. SIEGFRIED: Two limpid dewdrops, clasped in a radiant Spring morning. KRIEMHILD: My mother cried for the eyes you're praising, when as a child I took a bad fall. Only the zeal of her prayers prevented me from becoming blind. See the scar here on my temple? SIEGFRIED: Let me kiss it. KRIEMHILD: You're an ardent doctor. Don't waste your medicine like this. The wound has already been healed for a while. SIEGFRIED: Now the flames of your face rekindle it, like the first day, when I saw you… KRIEMHILD: It's foolish, my blood rising up so rapidly. My mother compares me to a rose garden that alternates white roses to the red ones. SIEGFRIED: A rose garden that speaks without saying anything, like love, which needs no words.

GUNTHER: Don't even think that, it's not easy to bridle a wild colt. GISELHER: You, my king and brother, watch without seeing. Those two have already bridled each other. SIEGFRIED: King Gunther, in exchange for my sword, which I consecrated to you, you gave me a regal hospitality that makes me happier by the day. Now I dare ask you for an even greater payment: your sister, Kriemhild, for my bride. GISELHER: What did I tell you? As you can see, the bridles are sturdy. GUNTHER: Where are you going? GISELHER: I'm running to Kriemhild, to read the happiness on her face! GUNTHER: I have no doubt, Kriemhild will be happy to become your bride. But don't deprive us of her presence too soon. What would this court be without her smile? HAGEN: Wait a moment, Gunther! Before you commit definitely, I advise you to set one condition: ask Siegfried, in exchange, for his help in conquering Brunhild. SIEGFRIED: Why, Hagen, do you still push your king to a deadly deed? GUNTHER: I will have to fight alone against the queen of Iceland, no one will be able to give me his help. HAGEN: He can, and he's the only one. GUNTHER: I don't understand how. HAGEN: He owns the Nibelungs' treasure. He killed the dragon and bathed in its blood. His is the net that turns one invisible. You'd be afraid to fight a woman? You know well that the sword finds no easy prey in you. SIEGFRIED: You deceive yourself, Hagen. Iron can strike me and bring me death, and for that I thank the linden leaf that fell on my body while I was bathing in the dragon's blood. I have a vulnerable spot where death can find its opening… but that's not why I withdraw. It's just that deceit is not convenient to us and all of this tastes like betrayal. HAGEN: Does it seem to you that you're betraying someone, if you use your sword where your fist is not enough? What strength does your love for Kriemhild have? I thought that for her, you would have dared anything. GUNTHER: If you can, help me, Siegfried. We'll celebrate our weddings together: for Brunhild, I will give you Kriemhild. SIEGFRIED: Ah, Kriemhild… for you, for your love… GUNTHER: Help me, Siegfried! SIEGFRIED: So be it. I will help you. HAGEN: But for eternity, not a word. The three of us, with no other witnesses: may the fourth one be death.

BRUNHILD: Welcome to the court of Iceland. SIEGFRIED: Your first greeting is not for me, queen, but for king Gunther, to whom I am a vassal. BRUNHILD: A vassal, you are? SIEGFRIED: Yes, queen. BRUNHILD: What brings you to my court, king Gunther? GUNTHER: The fame of your valor, queen, and the desire to have you in Worms as a bride. BRUNHILD: I will be your bride if you win me in the three trials I will propose to you. But if you lose… HAGEN: Never was king Gunther defeated. GUNTHER: And now that I see you, nothing will make me desist. I'm impatient to measure myself against you for the conquest of your beauty. BRUNHILD: Fearless you are, stranger! Your head will fall like that of many other haughty kings. Look at their weapons! GUNTHER: Death I fear not, if it comes from you. I am ready. BRUNHILD: Bring the weapons!

BRUNHILD: To you, Gunther! SIEGFRIED: I am at your side, Gunther. BRUNHILD: Spear and shield! BRUNHILD: Don't be happy. You haven't won yet!

GUNTHER: Why are you so sad, oh my queen? Yours wasn't a defeat, you won my heart. And at your feet, now I am no king but a slave. Happy you will be in my green land, far from your lonely rocks. BRUNHILD: Don't delude yourself, Gunther. You only bring a prisoner there. GUNTHER: No, I bring you, the worthy queen of the Burgundians. BRUNHILD: You keep me by force. GUNTHER: You deceive yourself. You'll be mine by love. BRUNHILD: Don't speak to me of love! HAGEN: It's only a few hours longer, now. Land is almost in sight. BRUNHILD: Teach your jackals not to enter without my permission!

HAGEN: Forgive me, Gunther. GUNTHER: Hagen… I think yours wasn't good advice. HAGEN: Why? She was won. GUNTHER: But not by me. And perhaps, obscurely, Brunhild suspects it. HAGEN: Give her time. She still hears the gloomy screams of ravens and carrion crows, but when she listens to the lark and the nightingale sing, her heart will change, I'm sure of it.

BRUNHILD: You seem proud of steering the ship that brings me, as a prisoner, to Burgundy. SIEGFRIED: You deceive yourself, milady. You are a queen. BRUNHILD: A queen won by force. SIEGFRIED: Don't be upset, it was you who proposed the fight. BRUNHILD: And where were you? While the king was fighting. SIEGFRIED: On the ship, so that the beautiful bride wouldn't lack a worthy welcome. BRUNHILD: Were you that sure of his victory, then? SIEGFRIED: Yes. BRUNHILD: You hold him in high esteem. Has he ever deigned to fight you? SIEGFRIED: Oh, yes. BRUNHILD: Did he win against you!? SIEGFRIED: Of course. BRUNHILD: And yet… when I saw you… BRUNHILD: I believed you were the king… and that I should fight against you… and a trembling came over me… a trembling mixed with dejection. Fear… yes, fear… I don't know if it was for your life… or mine… and I thought, he will win me. BRUNHILD: Come on, talk to me! Please. Tell me of your land. SIEGFRIED: A wonderful land, where the Sun brightens up every color. BRUNHILD: But the gemstones of Iceland… their brilliance has no equal in the whole world. SIEGFRIED: But it's cold and frigid as rock. While the colors of the flowers that grow in Burgundy make the air smell sweet, they seem to speak of love… look! Look how lively is the blue of this endless sky. BRUNHILD: Oh, yes… it's beautiful. I've never seen such a color in my land, except in your eyes, Siegfried. Ah, this journey…! I wish it would never end! ?: Land in sight! SIEGFRIED: Furl the sail! [I'm NOT a sailing expert, but "to furl" is what WordReference gives me for "ammainare"… that is, the tecnical term for lowering the sail] SIEGFRIED: Take the oars in hand! HAGEN: Hoist up the king's banner!

HANDMAIDEN: Hear that, milady? It's the victory signal! KRIEMHILD: He comes back! It's him, Gutruna! It's him! My soul and life… come, let's go back in, quick. KRIEMHILD: Oh! Giselher! GISELHER: Take heart, little sister, your brother has run to your aid! Let's go, our mother is waiting for us. GERNOT: Welcome back, Gunther! Hail to you, Brunhild! UTE: You couldn't give my heart a greater joy. Be you welcome in Burgundy, you are truly beautiful and worthy of being our queen. KRIEMHILD: We'll become sisters. BRUNHILD: You sooth my shame over having been won. UTE: You speak of shame… BRUNHILD: With the sincerity of my land. KRIEMHILD: My brother won you for love. HAGEN: She is his by right of arms. KRIEMHILD: Shut up, Hagen. She is the king's bride. Only love moved my brother, and may God grant the both of them a long happiness. GUNTHER: Thank you, Kriemhild. I invoke for you the same joy I feel. If I am allowed to choose a groom for you… KRIEMHILD: Milord, arrange it as you wish. GUNTHER: What do you say, mother? UTE: You are the king. GUNTHER: Then, please, release me from a promise and oath of mine and offer your hand to Siegfried. SIEGFRIED: No word could I tell you, oh king, to express my gratitude and my infinite joy to you. And to you, Kriemhild, I swear to love you faithfully for life and beyond life.

UTE: Don't fidget, daughter! How can Gutruna tie your gown? KRIEMHILD: I can't, mother! I can't! HANDMAIDEN: Happiness makes her impatient. KRIEMHILD: My heart is beating so hard… UTE: That you don't know anymore if the necklace goes in the bracelet's place or vice versa. KRIEMHILD: It's true, mother. But I'm so happy! UTE: Shut up! You must not say that. Don't listen to her, elves and Norns, and ugly she-mice with only one eye! [I… don't think the last one is correct. Obviously, she must be referring to some other kind of magical being that may be mischievous or malevolent, but the more I listen to that bit, the less I understand it… my best guess would be either "bruttatope" or "bruttatore", but I've never heard of any creature with a similar name, which is why I went with "brutte tope", "ugly she-mice", and called it a day.] KRIEMHILD: But I'm happy anyway. And not just for me, but also for Gunther. HANDMAIDEN: The whole kingdom will be celebrating. OTHER HANDMAIDEN: We'll finally have a queen.

GUNTHER: I've been looking everywhere for you. Kriemhild is almost ready, she's eager to go to the temple. BRUNHILD: How can you allow a vassal to marry your sister? GUNTHER: Siegfried is richer than a king! BRUNHILD: Then sit him on the stall nearest to your throne, if wealth is all that's needed not to be servants, here. GUNTHER: He's the first among my warriors! He conquered twelve kingdoms. BRUNHILD: And do you, who were able to win Brunhild, owe him anything, if he did something that would have been a thousand times easier for you!? BRUNHILD: This wedding offends me, and your house. And I don't want such dishonor. GUNTHER: I'm begging you, Brunhild, ask me for anything else, I'll be glad to satisfy your every will. But think on it: about Siegfried… BRUNHILD: You can't impose his presence on me as a relative. GUNTHER: He's a king, as I am myself! BRUNHILD: He introduced himself to me as a vassal! GUNTHER: It's a secret, this one, that I'll never be able to reveal to you. BRUNHILD: A secret!? A deal with the servants that the queen must not know about! Then listen to me: until you talk, Gunther, I'll be your bride… but not your woman.

GUNTHER: Oh, Hagen… did you hear? GUNTHER: What does your wisdom advise me to do? HAGEN: Be at peace. Don't fret. She can still be tamed, as she was in Iceland… GUNTHER: Like in Iceland? HAGEN: We began with magical arts, and with magical arts we'll have to end. Listen…

HAGEN: Yet a little longer and the gold will be ours. I have a weapon that, in my hand, will be subtler than a blade. ALBERICH: Which one? HAGEN: Gunther's love for Brunhild, who denies herself to him. HAGEN: My cunning will guide him where he aims. But then… I will pour in his ear a poisonous insinuation that, little by little, will carry out my game. HAGEN: Who could consider me a bad courtier, if my advice to the king will be to his advantage and apparently honest? ALBERICH: You speak through riddles. HAGEN: I have led Gunther to once again ask Siegfried for his help. Brunhild will be tamed and given to the king by the very man she so loves. ALBERICH: So, you tie them all up in one net. HAGEN: The queen can do anything. And her every will shall be satisfied. ALBERICH: And when she discovers the trick… HAGEN: May not even the air suspect anything.

SIEGFRIED: Brunhild.

KRIEMHILD: Where did you find this magnificent jewel? HANDMAIDEN: It fell from your husband's clothes. KRIEMHILD: Oh, it's certainly a wedding gift. But then he must have forgotten about it. KRIEMHILD: Strange, though… GISELHER: I challenge you to a run, Siegfried! Gernot will be the judge! GERNOT: Go! GISELHER: Don't laugh, Siegfried! Who can assure me that you didn't stop for fear of being defeated? GISELHER: Little sister! I beat your husband!

GERNOT: Let's go, Giselher. We're just in the way here. GISELHER: I think so, too.

KRIEMHILD: Don't you see anything in me that makes me beautiful? SIEGFRIED: Everything. Everything is beautiful and perfect in you. KRIEMHILD: But… there is one thing that adorns my dress. SIEGFRIED: It's wonderful. But around your body, I'd like to put the rainbow, for it suits you better. KRIEMHILD: And I would accept it. But then, you shouldn't forget it as you did with this… I didn't even notice your gift. SIEGFRIED: What gift? KRIEMHILD: It was Gutruna who found it in the room. SIEGFRIED: It must have been your mother who lost it. KRIEMHILD: No, I know her jewels. SIEGFRIED: Did you say it was in the room? KRIEMHILD: It fell from your clothes. SIEGFRIED: From my clothes? Now I understand… give it to me, let's throw it into the Rhine! KRIEMHILD: Does it hold an evil spell, to scare you that much? SIEGFRIED: A terrible secret. I can't tell you anything else! KRIEMHILD: To me!? Yet you confided to me a graver secret: the vulnerable spot where death can strike you. SIEGFRIED: It was only my secret. KRIEMHILD: And this one? SIEGFRIED: Not entirely. KRIEMHILD: And so it belongs to you and to another man? Or to another woman!? SIEGFRIED: Quick, Kriemhild, hide that jewel! Hide it! KRIEMHILD: No, if you won't talk! SIEGFRIED: I'll tell you everything, I swear it to you. SIEGFRIED: I obeyed an order from the king. Maybe the jewel got caught on my clothes, and I didn't realize it…

BRUNHILD: Stop, Kriemhild! The queen is entitled to go first here. KRIEMHILD: I'll wait for you, so we can bathe together. BRUNHILD: I'll be glad to turn you down. Remember that you are wife to a vassal! KRIEMHILD: What are you saying, sister? I don't understand you. BRUNHILD: Don't call me sister! Royal blood courses through my veins! KRIEMHILD: Don't I have the same blood as the king, your husband? BRUNHILD: Not anymore, ever since a servant contaminated it! KRIEMHILD: Enough, Brunhild! I won't tollerate such insolence even from the queen! BRUNHILD: How dare you asnwer me like this!? I despise you. KRIEMHILD: My husband, whom you call a vassal, could make you bite the dust! BRUNHILD: You're talking nonsense, insolent one! He is a servant and I am the queen. KRIEMHILD: A queen won by force! BRUNHILD: By a king! KRIEMHILD: By a king, yes, that you call a vassal. And twice already. BRUNHILD: You lie! You can't prove that! KRIEMHILD: Do you know this jewel? BRUNHILD: Of course. It belongs to me. And because I see it in a stranger's hands, it must have been stolen from me. KRIEMHILD: And yet this wasn't given to me by a thief. BRUNHILD: And by whom, then!? KRIEMHILD: The man who tamed you, but not my brother, not Gunther! BRUNHILD: You are crazy! Yours is slander! KRIEMHILD: Siegfried gave it to me, as it got caught in his clothes on your wedding night, when you were won for the second time! KRIEMHILD: And now, humiliate him again. BRUNHILD: Careful, Kriemhild! If what you say is true, my revenge will be ruthless.

GUNTHER: Only I am guilty. I wanted this deceit, justified by my endless love. I was and I am a slave to this feeling, that doesn't want me to live anywhere where you aren't. GUNTHER: I could give up everything: life, kingdom, honors. But not you. Please, Brunhild, I am awaiting a gesture of forgiveness from you that will calm my torment. Just one. GUNTHER: A wish of yours is law, here in Burgundy, and I will grant it with no hesitation. What can I do to make up for the offense? Tell me. Tell me what you want. HAGEN: A life-or-death ruling. GUNTHER: Hagen! HAGEN: He told. He broke the oath. GUNTHER: He'll be banished from the land of Burgundy! HAGEN: The man who did this must die! BRUNHILD: Yes! He must die! That is what I want! HAGEN: You demand it, and I approve it. Oh, king Gunther, forgive me if I spoke first. The decision is up to you. Choose, then, between Siegfried… and the queen. GUNTHER: I can't! I can't want the death of a brother! I pushed him to that deed, he obeyed me. It would be worse than a murder. HAGEN: The offense to the queen is such. As long as Siegfried lives, the shadow of deceit will weigh on Brunhild. GUNTHER: I can't. And you, too, Brunhild, you can't, you must not want this disgrace! BRUNHILD: He must die! GUNTHER: No, never. I will never consent to this.

HAGEN: But he will die. HAGEN: If you… BRUNHILD: If I… HAGEN: If you won't put yourself between him and your avenger. BRUNHILD: I was shamed, given away as a gift, bargained… HAGEN: Yes. You were the currency that allowed him to obtain Kriemhild. BRUNHILD: Let him die, then! I want revenge!

GUNTHER: It's frightening. It's horrible. I don't want it! How is it Siegfried's fault if the jewel got caught on his clothes!? HAGEN: He betrayed your secret. GUNTHER: And what would they say, Kriemhild… and my brothers? HAGEN: They won't know about it. They're too soft to understand that it was necessary. HAGEN: But don't worry. I will handle setting up the farce. HAGEN: A false declaration of war will induce Kriemhild to reveal his secret to me. As long as I know where he's vulnerable, it will take only me to carry out the deed. HAGEN: You're not saying anything. Good. The rest is my work.

SWORD INSTRUCTOR: Strike to the side. Head. No… you try, Giselher, start with the side. Head. Strike to the side. Head. Strike to the side. Head… HAGEN: Why so sad, Kriemhild? You still haven't made peace with your husband? KRIEMHILD: Siegfried is good, he spared me any reproach. KRIEMHILD: But now a greater anxiety torments me. HAGEN: Anxiety? KRIEMHILD: The war. HAGEN: And what do you fear? Spears and arrows bounce off your husband's body like off hard steel. KRIEMHILD: Spears and arrows? Those are what scares me. Their point only needs the width of my thumbnail to penetrate. HAGEN: And what does that mean? KRIEMHILD: Siegfried is vulnerable in one spot. And that's what frightens me. HAGEN: Yeah, I remember… he himself told me of a certain… linden leaf, I think, that fell… KRIEMHILD: Between his shoulders. HAGEN: I remember. So he said. HAGEN: Don't worry, Kriemhild, a leaf is so small! KRIEMHILD: But his temerity is so very great. HAGEN: There will be many of us protecting his shoulders. He's your husband, and everyone will want to be his shield. KRIEMHILD: Thank you, Hagen, you speak nobly. HAGEN: Don't fear. I will always ride by his side. KRIEMHILD: This comforts me. You have a keen eye and a strong, swift arm! HAGEN: Don't worry, I will protect him. I promise. KRIEMHILD: You are generous. HAGEN: Just… you should point out to me the exact spot. Embroider on his war clothes a tiny cross to mark that spot. KRIEMHILD: A tiny cross? HAGEN: It's almost madness. He would laugh at you if you told him. But since I'll be his keeper, I'd rather… nothing be overlooked. KRIEMHILD: It's here.

KRIEMHILD: Too soon have the happy days flown by. And who knows how long you'll be away from me? I will pray for you, the whole time. SIEGFRIED: It won't be long, I promise. It won't be long before the Saxons regret their haughtiness. SIEGFRIED: What does that mean? KRIEMHILD: Strange… SIEGFRIED: I'll go and see.

HANDMAIDEN: Milady! The ambassadors of Saxony and Denmark bring good news. KRIEMHILD: Speak! Quick! HANDMAIDEN: They came to ask Gunther for peace. Peace, milady! KRIEMHILD: Oh, Gutruna! May you be blessed! You couldn't have brought me a greater joy!

SIEGFRIED: I don't like it. I was already looking forward to teaching those dogs how to make war. HAGEN: I had them driven out of the castle before they could even speak. SIEGFRIED: You did well, Hagen. GISELHER: It must have been your fame that scared the Saxons and Danes! SIEGFRIED: I would have liked for them to know the strength of my steel. [He actually says "la tempra", which can refer to tempering metal but also to someone's fortitude or courage… the pun doesn't work quite as well in English, I think] HAGEN: Don't get upset. Today you'll still get to use your weapons. King Gunther summoned his knights for a hunt in the forest of Oden. GISELHER: It will surely be a gayer diversion than war. [… yeah, no, I'm keeping this] HAGEN: Are you coming with us? SIEGFRIED: Do you even need to ask? Even if you managed to tie me up, I'd gnaw at the rope to reach you.

HAGEN: Rumold! HAGEN: You'll give the signal to end the hunt from the great clearing, and not before sunset. RUMOLD: Good, sir.

KRIEMHILD: Don't leave! I have had a sad omen. SIEGFRIED: What dream frightenend you? KRIEMHILD: A boar wounding you to death. SIEGFRIED: Should the dragon's slayer be afraid of a boar? Give me a goodbye kiss. KRIEMHILD: Come back. SIEGFRIED: What a strange good wish is yours. What's gotten into you? I'm going out with some good friends, and unless the mountains crumble, nothing will happen to me. What do you fear, then? KRIEMHILD: Siegfried! KRIEMHILD: I wanted to tell you… SIEGFRIED: Another dream!? KRIEMHILD: I just wanted to see you one more time…

BRUNHILD: Stop!

GERNOT: We have enough game to satiate to the whole of Burgundy! GISELHER: And I have enough of an appetite to devour all of it! GISELHER: But, isn't Siegfried with you? ?: He disappeared into the woods, following the tracks of a boar as big as a bear! GISELHER: Then we won't see him until the prey's been taken down!

HAGEN: This is the place. He has to pass through here. Like any hunter, he'll be dying of thirst and happy to quench it in that spring. HAGEN: Think on it! We won't get get another occasion like this! GUNTHER: Are your guts made of bronze, that you don't feel shaken by this? HAGEN: As long as he lives, you'll be unhappy. Brunhild's hatred towards him has its roots in love. GUNTHER: No, Hagen. Don't confirm this thought that's always tormenting me. HAGEN: Not anymore, if you listen to me.

SIEGFRIED: What are you doing here? I didn't see the signal for a gathering. HAGEN: It's sweet to rest after a hunting trip. SIEGFRIED: It's even sweeter to spend the night in the woods between dream and wakefulness. In the morning you hear the singing of birds, you see the sun peek through the leaves… but what's the matter, Gunther? You don't look glad to me. HAGEN: The king is tired. You, too, rest! Put down your weapons and tell us what you hunted! SIEGFRIED: See, Gunther, that magnicent boar? I ran after him for over an hour. But let's leave the tale for later. I'm dying of thirst and, talkative as I am, I'll go mute, if I don't drink first. HAGEN: There's a spring nearby, with waters more sparkling than the blond wine of the Rhine. SIEGFRIED: I'll go quench my thirst and come back!

HAGEN: We'll say that the bandits lying in ambush in the woods killed him in his sleep.

SIEGFRIED: Kriemhild… Kriemhild… Kriemhild…

KRIEMHILD: No! KRIEMHILD: Siegfried… oh! KRIEMHILD: I kiss your mouth… that has no more breath. I kiss your lips, and they're bloodless and cold! UTE: Come, child… KRIEMHILD: No! I want to keep him like this for me! Always! Bury me with him… bring his clothes, clothes of silk and gold, and the flowers he so loved, pick them all! Oh, yes… who would they still bloom for? And place everything into the coffin, even my wedding gown, and me with him, so that I may cover his body myself. GISELHER: A terrible disgrace… KRIEMHILD: No! An murder! A betrayal! GERNOT: It was a thief's spear that struck him. KRIEMHILD: I know who the thief is. Oh, mother! KRIEMHILD: Stop! How dare you. ?: We're taking him into the cathedral. GISELHER: He belongs to God now. GERNOT: Come, sister. My heart is as torn as yours. KRIEMHILD: No! No, I want to follow him. Be near him! If I don't, they'll steal him from me. To take him where I could never find him! KRIEMHILD: You claim that he was killed by thieves? KRIEMHILD: I want proof. I demand the trial of the dead! KRIEMHILD: And everyone be there for it. Even he who I do not see here.

KRIEMHILD: A man was killed. I ask for truth and justice. Are you ready to testify for yourselves? ALL: We are ready. KRIEMHILD: You! Murderer! Justice! I want justice! HAGEN: Answer, Gunther! ?: The queen!

[four-loose-screws]

Hello! Firstly, I'm new to your blog, and I'm really glad I found it! I appreciate what you do, and it's great to see the changes made between regions!

Secondly, if it's okay, could you translate Hubert and Byleths A Support? I hear there's actually a difference in the support depending on the gender of the player, and I'm interested to see the version between Hubert and a female Byleth!

Thanks for introducing yourself! :) There hasn't been much going on recently as I had to go missing for a while, but I hope you've still found plenty of interesting posts around here, in the time its taken for me to respond.

EDIT: So I originally referenced the Fandom Fire Emblem Wiki for Byleth / Hubert's support conversations, which provides the exact same conversation for both f!Byleth and m!Byleth, so I based my wording on that assumption. However, a fantastic anon pointed out that the localization actually did choose a more direct translation, and retained the f!Byleth and m!Byleth differences present in the Japanese version of the A support. My original text is below the updated version, for archival purposes.

----------------------------

So this answer takes a super interesting twist I did not expect at all!!

First, what you heard is very much correct - just on a small scale, in the very last line of Hubert's. Otherwise, the two A supports are identical.

However, the unique line in the f!Byleth version lost a couple layers of meaning, because... here's the part that takes this from a standard answer to a fascinating one... you wouldn't know the full context unless you know a very specific Chinese mythological story!

I didn't know it either, actually, until I Googled the Japanese words used in the support.

The 'birds' Hubert speaks of were originally not just any birds. They referenced the story of the 比翼の鳥, hiyoku no tori. (Note that is the Japanese word, I don't know any Chinese and can't provide the Chinese pronunciation.) It tells the tale of 2 birds, 1 male and 1 female, each with only 1 eye and 1 wing. They cannot fly unless they are side by side, and so they are always together.

As a quick Google image search can convey, the birds are sometimes depicted as clearly being separate birds, other times they are so close together they look more 1 bird with 2 heads.

The term came to have a second meaning of "happily married couple," so Hubert did not say anything uncommon by comparing him and Byleth to the birds.

Who would have guessed this poetic line was even more so in the Japanese? It hurts to see this stuff lost in translation, but it only serves to prove that people with blogs like mine provide a necessary service! ...As necessary as providing deeper information into mass media can be, anyway.

I included my own translation as well, which does work well enough on my blog because I get the luxury of translator's notes, unlike video games.

Note that the wording is awkward because I kept the Japanese and English word order side-by-side, as I tend to do with very short translations. It's fun to do when I can manage it.

Localization:

f!Byleth:

Hubert: Heh. I've already dedicated my life to Lady Edelgard. To throw my lot in with you is inconceivable. But if I had two lives to give... I might devote one of them to you. We could be a couplet of birds, flying alongside the sovereign of Black Eagles...

m!Byleth:

Hubert: Heh. I've already dedicated my life to Lady Edelgard. To throw my lot in with you is inconceivable. But if I had two lives to give... I might devote one of them to you. Not as master and servant, but as equal partners.

JP f!Byleth:

[ヒューベルト][Hubert] くく……我が命は主エーデルガルト様に (Chuckles ... My life, to Lady Edelgard) すでに捧げてあります。▼ (has already been dedicated.) 故に、貴殿と一蓮托生のような生き方は (Therefore, a way of life in which we shared our lot together) 決してできません。▼ (would never be possible.) ですが、もし私に２つの命があれば (But, if I had two lives,) 残りの１つを貴殿に預けるというのも……▼ (giving the remaining one to you would also...) 悪くはなかったかもしれませんな。▼ (not be bad, perhaps.) 黒き鷲の王に付き従って飛ぶ、(Flying and following the king of the Black Eagles,) 比翼の鳥のような二人に……。▼(the two of us like the hiyoku no tori...)

JP m!Byleth:

[ヒューベルト][Hubert] くく……我が命は主エーデルガルト様に (Chuckles ... My life, to Lady Edelgard) すでに捧げてあります。▼ (has already been dedicated.) 故に、貴殿と一蓮托生のような生き方は (Therefore, a way of life in which we shared our lot together) 決してできません。▼ (would never be possible.) ですが、もし私に２つの命があれば (But, if I had two lives,) 残りの１つを貴殿に預けるというのも……▼ (giving the remaining one to you would also...) 悪くはなかったかもしれませんな。▼ (not be bad, perhaps.) 主君と従者として、とはまた異なる…… (As something yet different from master and servant...) 対等の仲間として。▼ (As equal partners.)

-----------------------------

Original text of my response, saved for archival purposes:

So this answer takes a super interesting twist I did not expect at all!!

First, what you heard is very much correct - just on a small scale, in the very last line of Hubert's. In localization, f!Byleth line was cut and merged with the m!Byleth line.

This is probably because the f!Byleth line couldn't translate directly at all unless... here's the part that takes this from a standard answer to a fascinating one... you know a very specific Chinese mythological story.

I didn't know it either, actually, until I Googled the Japanese words used in the support.

The story is of the 比翼の鳥, hiyoku no tori. (Note that is the Japanese word, I don't know any Chinese and can't provide the Chinese pronunciation.) It tells the tale of 2 birds, 1 male and 1 female, each with only 1 eye and 1 wing. They cannot fly unless they are side by side, and so they are always together.

As a quick Google image search can convey, the birds are sometimes depicted as clearly being separate birds, other times they are so close together they look more 1 bird with 2 heads.

The term came to have a second meaning of "happily married couple," so Hubert did not say anything uncommon by comparing him and Byleth to the birds.

The localizers could have still made the comparison that Hubert and Byleth would be like lovebirds, or be a happily married couple... but since the originally intended meaning could translate only to the players who happen to like both Fire Emblem and traditional Chinese stories, it's just as valid to merge the two supports I think.

I included a translation as well, which does work well enough on my blog because I get the luxury of translator's notes, unlike video games.

Note that the wording is awkward because I kept the Japanese and English word order side-by-side, as I tend to do with very short translations. It's fun to do when I can manage it.

Localization:

Hubert: Heh. I've already dedicated my life to Lady Edelgard. To throw my lot in with you is inconceivable. But if I had two lives to give... I might devote one of them to you. Not as master and servant, but as equal partners.

Keep reading

JP f!Byleth:

[ヒューベルト][Hubert] くく……我が命は主エーデルガルト様に (Chuckles ... My life, to Lady Edelgard) すでに捧げてあります。▼ (has already been dedicated.) 故に、貴殿と一蓮托生のような生き方は (Therefore, a way of life in which we shared our lot together) 決してできません。▼ (would never be possible.) ですが、もし私に２つの命があれば (But, if I had two lives,) 残りの１つを貴殿に預けるというのも……▼ (giving the remaining one to you would also...) 悪くはなかったかもしれませんな。▼ (not be bad, perhaps.) 黒き鷲の王に付き従って飛ぶ、(Flying and following the king of black eagles,) 比翼の鳥のような二人に……。▼(the two of us like the hiyoku no tori...)

JP m!Byleth:

[ヒューベルト][Hubert] くく……我が命は主エーデルガルト様に (Chuckles ... My life, to Lady Edelgard) すでに捧げてあります。▼ (has already been dedicated.) 故に、貴殿と一蓮托生のような生き方は (Therefore, a way of life in which we shared our lot together) 決してできません。▼ (would never be possible.) ですが、もし私に２つの命があれば (But, if I had two lives,) 残りの１つを貴殿に預けるというのも……▼ (giving the remaining one to you would also...) 悪くはなかったかもしれませんな。▼ (not be bad, perhaps.) 主君と従者として、とはまた異なる…… (As something yet different from master and servant...) 対等の仲間として。▼ (As equal partners.)

[rocketmuse]

I thought I'd share my playlist for the anniversary of the boathouse kiss. :)

Song translations, MANY thoughts, and timeline under the break.

Noise warning for song 19, Hinahanap-Hanap Kita. 4:23 to the end. Loud high pitched beeps.

YouTube music version to be made soon.

Translations for foreign songs:

Ewan [Dunno] — Apo Hiking Society — Filipino/Tagalog

Amour plastique [Plastic love] — Videoclub — French

Panalangin [Prayer] — Apo Hiking Society/Moonstar88 — Filipino/Tagalog

Hinahanap-Hanap Kita [I'm Looking For You] — Rivermaya — Filipino/Tagalog

This is a collaborative playlist made with my friend.

Thought Good Old-Fashioned Lover Boy would be a good starter song. Something about the music. Represents a good start of Alec persuing Maurice, like, hey, I can be yours... Whatcha doin'?

I added Puppy Princess because of the chorus but I know some people don't like that song so... You can skip if you'd like. KISS MEEEEE KIISS ME WITH YIIR EYESSS CLOSED . ALL I WANT IS YOU YEAH YOU. TELL ME I'M NOT FUNNY TELL ME I'M LEGIIIIT

Ewan. OH MY GOD this song is so them. Alec cares for Maurice, and doesn't like not being taken seriously or being treated badly and brushed off.

"I don't know why you're like that, you're difficult to talk to and you're a snob" COME ON IS THAT NOT THEM — Just a smile from you, and I'll be in heaven. Please give me a response, anything but "No idea"... What a perfect representation of Alec's continuous persuit of Maurice, always talking, always trying...

I could go on with every lyric.

Edit: I just realised this song fits so well for Alec's letters and meeting at the museum. Must resist the urge to add the same exact track twice.

So about Touch Me... Some of the lyrics apply better in other versions. Spotify just has this version tho. Touch me, just like that.

All I've Ever Known. Maurice discovered so much that night about touch and sharing and being with someone. He wants to be with Alec. "All I've ever known is how to hold my own, but now I want to hold you too. [Hold you close, I don't wanna ever have to let you go. Hold you tight, I don't wanna to back to the lonely life.]" Alec opened up his eyes and he'll never be the same.

Can't Help Falling in Love With You. 'Did you ever dream you'd a friend, Alec? ... Someone to last your whole life...' 'Alec, you're a dear fellow and we've been very happy.'

I'd Like To Walk Around In Your Mind was added from Maurice's perspective. Perhaps it fits Alec too...

I think Love At First Sight has the double meaning of the literal title, as well as "wouldn't you like to kiss her" perhaps being... Something Maurice would hear.

I Don't Dance. Based on this post/edit. Please watch this video oh my God.

Pink in the Night. Alec yearns for Maurice in the boathouse. He hasn't come. He hears his heart breaking tonight.

Every lyric is perhaps pulled straight from Alec's brain, to be honest. I remember seeing a post with this song in other contexts with them too. So yes, a few meanings.

Amour plastique. Alec reminiscences on the night in the Russet room. Why hasn't he come?

In my mind, everything goes wild. I lose myself in your eyes. I drown myself in the vagueness of your loving gaze.

And at night I cry tears that stream down my cheeks. I think of you only when the days ends, only when my sad demons descend upon my mind, into the bottomless abyss.

Waiting in the boathouse at night, when the day ends.

I ring out in kisses all down your chest. Lost in the avalanche of my heart astray. Who are you? Where are you?

The moments of then repeat in his mind. Where is Maurice?

I suppose Hopelessly Devoted To You and I'm A Fool To Want You are self explanatory. Maurice should really come... Alec really toughed it out, 2 days he spent in the boathouse, really wanted to see Maurice, really knew they had something, and doesn't want to be treated like a dog. Generally, his 1st letter.

Moon Song. My friend said they added it as a general love song. — Why do you treat me like this? Why didn't you come to the boathouse? — Alec's 2nd letter as a whole. Plus bits of 1st.

And you pushed me in, and now my feet can't touch the bottom of you. ... So I will wait for the next time you want me, like a dog with a bird at your door.

Ewan would fit here tbh.

Panalangin. My only prayer in this lifetime: to be beside you, to be together with you, that's my prayer.

"I since cricket match do long to ... place both arms round you and share with you, the above now seems sweeter than words can say."

And this heart won't allow if you will be away from me, my love, please listen.

It also fits the end of museum.

I Want You. Maurice, can you come to the boathouse already? Alec has no power to teleport you there. I hold one card that I can't use.

I found you. I found the door, but when I stepped through, there was no floor. He found Maurice, bit he's not being here for Alec.

You're coming back And it's the end of the world We're starting over And I love you, darling And I am done, dear

Alec wishes this would happen. Also, he does come back later and they love again over, and "it is finished".

Credit for suggesting the next two songs goes to @beatle-capaldi!!! He also wrote was in quotations!

English Summer Rain

The Most Radical Thing To Do

Hinahanap-Hanap Kita. 1st letter, he's looking for Maurice. Thinking about them together.

In my thoughts and dreams, in every turn of destiny, I look for you. Also applies to that hotel/post-hotel feeling. I look for you, even if I try to forget you, saying goodbye, looking back...

Wildest Dreams. They think a lot of each other. They share once more. But they must say goodbye. Alec saw this coming. Maurice hopes that Alec will remember him like this.

I Hear a Symphony. Alec truly opened up Maurice's eyes. Maurice was meant to be with him. He helped Maurice, changed his life. But now Alec is leaving on ship... Or is he? The symphony leads into...

An orchestral sountrack. The Boathouse. Unfortunately the Maurice soundtrack is not on spotify. It's on my personal YouTube music version. I added it because it just captures the boathouse the only way the sountrack itself can.

The Word of Your Body (Reprise). MLM people have moment of romantic tension, which culminates in confessions of love. Just had to add it. "Haven't you heard the word of your body?" perfectly describes Alec gifting and showing Maurice the wonder of truest physical affection and love. He lets Maurice be okay with himself, and again, changes everything. Every lyric is perfect.

Also, sorry JBW, I like other versions more... Too bad Spotify is mean.

I See The Light. Yeah. Every lyric. Maurice is Rapunzel. Movie Blond too. Both the morning at Russet room and the museum. And the world has somehow shifted. All at once everything is different, now that I see you. "By now they were in love with each other consciously."...

Suddenly Seymour. Suddenly see more, yeah? Clive = ass and someone gives him affection for once, wow! Sidenote, I want to sing this with them and their accents... Suddenly SCUDDER...

Helpless. Musical theatre songs seem to be good retellings of their love story. It's why they belong in post boathouse. Summaries and retellings. They're also good at conveying love they'd feel for each other in general, all times ever. Like loving men, retelling a story.

I'll Cover You. Cute love song feat. gays. I like to imagine them dancing around, declaring their love and devotion for each other. Walking and dancing around like in the original scene, sometime post canon. In my own imagination, I thought of Alec as Angel and Maurice (Christopher) as Collins.

Video Games. They must love spending time together. I thought this to be Maurice POV. Only worth living if somebody is loving you I mean, come on.

It's you, it's you, it's all for you. Everything I do. I tell you all the time, heaven is a place on Earth with you.

Un sospiro. I headcanon that Maurice picks up the piano and plays for Alec. Perhaps he picked it up bc of/after Clive, but now can play it for someone who gives a shit.

Something about the melody reminds me of them. And then it gets more intense... A bit like the passions of love, showing up in sharing and touch and more, too.

Liebestraum. I mean, it means love dream/dream of love. I just had to. Also I just like Liszt.

Take Me Up With You, Dearie. This song is just so sweet... So soft... Edwardian to boot... I love how quintessentially 1909 it is. Discovered it in a YT video. The thought of them getting married makes me cry. This song in general makes me want to cry, it's so romantic, tender, and exudes my favourite era...

Let us float, float, float through the clouds, and just have a lot of fun. We'll go up, up, up as two and then come down as one.

Put Your Head on My Shoulder. We Belong Together. I always imagine Maurice and Alec slowdancing to songs that come on the radio together, when the 1950s hits... Alec probably rests his head on his shoulder as this plays and they dance...

I'm using a lot of ellipses, am I secretly Rupert Graves?

Welcome to the 70s and 80s. They love dancing together and being with each other. Now, Panalangin can be a happy song. My only prayer for this lifetime ... To be together with you. And this heart won't allow if you will be away from me.

Just the Two of Us. What a nice, vibey song. Great title, great scenario of them dancing to this...

Tiny Dancer. Your Song. MLM people in the 70s + Radio, being happy and in love with each other. — I just thought I should add some Elton. A different friend, and I, like him. Maurice sings to Alec, "And you can tell everybody this is your song." That I put down in words how wonderful life is with you in the world.

Electric Love. Fun fact: this song got me to share the playlist. Got me thinking about them and their anniversary again. The funky busy instrumental describes well their passionate love. The highs of electric LOOOOOOVE describe the intensity of them.

Alt text continued: themselves together under and the love. And the love. The song has its own tension and it perfectly pictures their own tension. So yeah, this is THEIR song quite literally.

Sorry if my music taste is perhaps basic. I just made it for when I hear songs that are Them.

Falling for Ya. Alec falls for Maurice. "I saw you when you first drove up, Mr Hall..." Something about Maurice, right? Plus really nice vintage vibes with the music. The bit about Into your arms and it's a secure sure sounds like Maurice. Awh, they're falling for *each other*...

Rainbow Connections. Gay and bi people. Marriage. Everything that Maurice and Alec went through to get here, where they were meant to be. Clive. Working for Clive. Leading up to now.

All the things that had to go right, all the things that had to go wrong, that lead us to the place where we were going all along.

On the YT version there's a soft/jazzy cover of Panalangin here. Because they're old and spending time together and being happy. What a throwback, a defined meaning in their lives over time.

Still Into You. After all these decades... Old and grown, together... True soulmates... Two men can defy the world... Maurice and Alec still roam the greenwood. Imagine Maurice meeting Alec's mom in this context. If only.

Postmodern Jukebox cover, because they are a quintessentially 20th century couple. They exude vintage.

Some piano playing for Alec. Soft, tender, romantic, emotional, true. Feels like nighttime. Feels like Maurice and Alec. And a throwback to the pre 1914 world as well. Claire de Lune feels like... A credits of life piece. Time spent in the early 1980s. Nocturne feels like that too, but more romantic. Smidge less nighttime. Ah yes, Gymnopédies. The truest credits feel of them all. None of these actually are credits for Maurice and Alec, but I struggle to find the word for this feeling. But yeah. These all have Them vibes to me. Piano of the time just does I suppose. Glad to be reminded of them at any time.

What a long playlist. Like going through almost their whole lives together. 1:52 hrs. Almost like a movie. Imagine that. A full movie of THEIR lives... But leaving to the imagination was a good thing. Led to this such action. Thank you E.M. Forster.

Timeline:

1. Pendersleigh

4. & 5. Russet Room. Night, then Morning

9. Cricket

10. Boathouse Nights

18. The Museum

20. The Hotel

21. After

23. The Boathouse

24. They Still Roam the Greenwood

I just like to imagine them dancing to songs on the radio, for decades to come...

[ficsforeren]

I just want to say you’ve successfully ruined all other eren fanfics for me... you’re actually the best, never doubt yourself! You’re like the isayama of the eren fanfic world Bc of how good you write him! I feel as if so many ppl are wrapped up in some sort of toxic eren that they forget how sweet and considerate his character actually is! You’re one of the few ppl who continues to write him like this so I really appreciate all of your content and hard work, thank you <3

no but honestly thank you so much for saying this. I really really need to hear this today. I've been having a writer's block lately, like the ideas are there but I just can't put them down properly into words. My english skill is so bad it's frustrating sometimes because I want to convey Eren's fragile feelings using pretty words and metaphors but both my vocabulary and imagination are very limited so... GAHHHHH I wish english was my first language but anyway i digress

THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU SOOOO MUCH I'm glad you like my version of Eren because he really is the sweetest character out there. sure he has some flaws but he's very adorable and kind and I want people to see him more in that light.

As a thank you, here's a snippet! (this one is really rough and I might change it later but just to give you a guys a quick look of their fun friend with benefits relationship hehe)

Eren is… adventurous when it comes to sex, which isn’t surprising, you must say. What shocks you is that strangely, you’re okay with it. It’s weird at first when he suddenly pours whipped cream and honey on your bare chest, licking every bit of it away with his tongue, all the way down to your navel. But once you realized just how fucking sexy it was to just watch his tongue darting out, giving you kitten licks around your nipple with that little mmm erupting from the back of his throat, you were done for. Following soon after, you watched him settle himself between your legs, swallowing thickly as you waited in anticipation. “Well,” Eren said with a naughty smirk as he dragged your lingerie away with his teeth. “I think we can lay off the honey for this one. You’re already sweet enough for me to taste.”

[pastaaa-bird]

(Um l'll start off by saying this was meant to be my second post, first being explain what is this AU exactly

SO UH to keep this short it's a sitcom/ sorta drama like world with running gags and the fact that every student is from a different country and follows some of their stereotypes is the idea behind it

just very slice of life with unrealistic tv scenarios

These might be a ooc? Then again their my interpretation of them as human teenagers so please don't take this seriously

Random Character info for my Hetalia highschool Au with picrew pictures as references

Bad friend trio edition

Gilbert

Is functioning on so many energy drinks, sleep? Ha no

He/they bi legend

Transmasc because l said so, l think he would be off and on about his pronouns though, sometimes just they/them, sometimes he thinks he should just use he/him. Reconsiders she/her, but for the most part he ends up with he/they. I don't think he would bother telling most people this. Expect for his closest two friend and his brothers

Seems to be scary but is actually a whole entire DORK, if you were to ask him about whatever he is currently interested in he will gladly rant to you like narrator to the opening of an action movie- very dramatic and engaging

Smart guyyyyy, does very well acadamically especially in history as it is his favourite but has a reputation for being a loss in class for chatting, fidgeting with pens or pencils and just overall seems to not pay attention

In seriousness he does also educate himself on lgbtq issues and histor, probable the head of those GSA things

Thinks they can sing...they can't, they does play the bass and drums well though-and air guitar of course. Ludwig has to deal with hearing them loudly singing either a pop or indie song in the shower :,)

Francis

Pan icon

Very flirty and it can come off super cheesy but a lot people think he's smooth with his flirting

Dirty jokes 24/7 from literally anything, it's gotten to a point where he just looks at someone when something that could be made into a dirty joke is said/happens and they just know what he is thinking

Preppy boy who wears blouses or fashionable boarding school-like blazers with an entire closet just for scarfs

Knows at least one thing about everyone, keeps up with the drama and updates a confused Antonio regularly something like "A:Hey, Hannah! F*pulls A aside and whispers: Don't talk to her, she the one who made a fake account for Madeline to bully her A: Oh fuck, okay" while the rest of the entire school already knows about what she did, Francis is a good friend👍

Is the guy who distracts the teacher by asking questions about their life when they mention something like "oh l went there on holidays btw", que Francis going "Really Sir? I've always wanted to go there, when did you go?" followed up by a 20 minute convo

Half his personality is making fun of the English- especially around Arthur whenever he can

Antonio

Bi legend

Himbo-just straight up a himbo, human version of "he's a little confused by he's got the spirit" like when Elizabetha told him that she's a trans girl and Antonio thought that meant she's ftm so he proudly said "Oh that's great! So proud of you, man :D" (yes he got corrected and apologised lol)

Reallyyyyyy likes soccer, and gets way too perfectionist with it, think him constantly retrying a certain move until he's convinced it's the best

FOOD- constantly hungry and yet always remains skinny enough but tbh he doesn't really eat junk food so that helps

Energy bars,always has them, drinks protein that Gil tried before since Antonio seemed to love it- but immediately spat it out with disgust while Antonio was sat there happily drinking his glass

His grades are ehhhh rusty to say the least, he tries working on them sometimes but they are not his strong suit. Gil tried hosting study nights to help Francis and Antonio but it just ended up like a regular sleep over. Alfred ends up helping him study in this imaginary series of mine :)

Can actually be quite intimidating when he wants to oh and a lot of girls find him attractive when he is and just overall always but of course he's oblivious

Things about them all

Friends since middle school! :) All happened to be a foreign kid who moved to America(ranges from 3 years old to 7 years old)

Tried making secret hand shake more then once but they always messed it up

Hypes eachother up for both dumb/not dumb decisions

despite growing up to be- v e r y different from one another they have a great dynamic and chemistry

They totally give eachother ironic gifts/cards for occasions,think "Congratulations on your wedding!"cards for birthdays and a guide for first time pregnant people for christmas

Basically bully eachother with their insults but it's always in good intention banter, mention how they would die for one another and also say how much of a bitch they think the other is in the same convo

Andddddd finally one random thing about them all,they all REALLY want to learn how to sword fight cuz WOOO it looks fun and cool. Maybe they do actually learn to in one episode? I think it would be funny for a B plot. While other characters are going through some dramatic event, there's the three of them learning how to sword fight with much trial and error

Oh! and here's credit for the picrew pictures :p

https://picrew.me/image_maker/457566

Thanks for reading :)

[fullyellowsun]

Park Village | 9

Camping:

I do not own the picture, credit to the owner.

Constructive criticisms are welcome! This is in Korean so for those of you who can read Korean and English, go ahead! I will post a full English version link to the Wattpad story in the masterlist! (Juyeon/주연 could be you.)

Pairing: baekhyun x juyeon/you

Genre: kpop idol’s relative!AU

Word Count: 1392 words

Description: Juyeon is going camping and Baekhyun's gonna be there.

Masterlist

"Pack up, we're going camping!" Chanyeol says out of nowhere.

"But I don't have camping stuff."

"I do so just pack clothes and toiletries... and pack warm."

"Fine..." I get up and pack and put them in the car. We spend the next few hours driving into a forest.

"Oh, and by the way, EXO's gonna be there." He says as we can see the camping site.

"What?! Why didn't you tell me this before. I wanna go."

"Because you've been avoiding them for the past week!"

"No I haven't..."

"I can tell you're avoiding them. What happened?"

"Nothing... I'm not avoiding them."

"We're gonna share a tent with Baekhyun, that's okay right?"

"No!" I say without thinking.

"Why?"

"Well... er, um... so, someone in Korea stole my first kiss. I'm not saying anymore."

"Which one... I'll kill them. Did you even like them?"

"It was only for the game. But still..."

"So neither of you liked each other? Then why are you avoiding them? 설마... do you like them?

"No... no way."

"Who is it? I won't do anything... just tell me."

"It's too late."

"For what? No... 백현이 did?" I just nod. "죽어 버릴거야, 그 쌕이가."

"야, 조용히해! 그 봐, they're staring at us! We've been in the car for too long. Let's go." I get out of the car and grab the tent bag. "이거 해볼까?"

"Okay..." Chanyeol helps me set up the tent. It was quite small and I didn't know if it would fit all 3 of us.

"Are you sure this will fit all of us?"

"We can just cuddle... it's cold anyways." I stare at him.

"You're sleeping in between us."

"You'll still sleep here?"

"I mean I kinda have to. Except I don't really wanna cuddle either of you. You're like a rock. I do NOT want to sleep with a rock."

"I can't tell if that's a compliment or not."

"Think however you want." I place the bedding inside and decorate it with fairy lights to make it more homey. I stuff the luggage to the sides of the tent and just relax. I can hear Chanyeol starting to cook food as the others trickle in. I could hear the conversation.

"Did you get Juyeon to come?"

"Yeah..."

"Why did she not want to hang out with us for the last week?"

"I may or may not have... kissed her."

"You what?!"

"Why? How? When?"

"It was for the pickup line contest... and I thought it would be funny but she took it a little more seriously."

"Why would you scare her away like that?"

"주연아! 자? 이러나! Go get some firewood with 세훈이!"

"어? 알았어!" I get out of the tent and start making my way into the forest. Sehun follows. It was quiet as we picked up sticks from the dirt.

"Did 백현형 actually kiss you?" Sehun says out of the blue.

"Uh... yeah." I say trying not to think about it.

"Did you like it?"

"Huh?"

"Was it a good kiss?" He asks again.

"Uhh... I don't remember. I was not in the mindset of whether it was a good kiss or not." I say slightly annoyed.

"Do you like 형?"

"Yeah, why would I hate him?"

"No, LIKE like."

"Uhh... I don't know."

"I think I do... you like him 주연아, that's why you took the kiss seriously and avoided for the last week."

"아... 아니야! I just needed to some time to think."

"주연아... I've only known you for a few weeks but I know that if you didn't like him, you would've laughed it off."

"You don't know me... 세훈 오빠. That was my first kiss. You don't understand. What would you do if your first kiss was from someone who's famous and you only a few weeks and don't even know if you like."

"그... 그거 너 첫키스였어?"

"어..."

"대박... okay I kind of understand but still, you could've acted like it was nothing."

"I'm not an actor! I can't act THAT well..."

"주연아..."

"Let me finish! I come to Korea to spend time with my family and end up related to an EXO member and then one of them kissed me and took my first kiss and-"

"주연아!"

"I said let me finish!"

"주연아!" Sehun grabs my shoulders and shakes me. "WHERE ARE WE?!" I stop to look around. I couldn't see the light of the campsite anymore.

"Oh no... where are we? Sehun 오빠 why didn't you stop me?!"

"I tried to... 주연아... what do we do? I'm scared."

"Why are YOU scared? You're supposed to be the man!" Sehun huddles behind me and holds onto my shoulders. I try to back track where we had picked up sticks and looked for areas with small or not as many sticks. "Why are you hiding behind me  오빠?!  There's nothing there."

"I swear I heard something." He crouches more behind me, if he did any more, he would be dragging on the floor.

"You are such a scaredy cat." I roll my eyes and continue to scan the area to look for some sort of sign that we were there. He stands up straight and clears his throat.

"No I'm not, I heard something." He crouches again. "You heard that?" I laugh.

"That was you moving." I continue moving and start hearing talking.

"You hear that? I found our campsite!" He runs over. I roll my eyes. The members start crowding Sehun asking what happened. He twisted the story to make him seem like the hero but I just let him take the spotlight. I put the sticks in the small fire and sit around it. Chanyeol sits next to me.

"I'm guessing you were the one to find the campsite." He asks. I just nod. "He was probably crouching behind you and jumping at every sound." I nod again and laugh.

"Just keep it a secret... I think after the trauma, he'll need the attention."

"Sometimes I think you're older than all the members."

"누나? (What boys call older sister or close older girl) It has a ring to it. Should I ask them to call me that?"

"They probably won't do it..."

"I know, but it's worth a try. 얘들아, let's tell some scary stories." I give a knowing smile to Sehun. They all nod in agreement and come sit around the campfire. We eat and tell stories and purposefully try to scare Sehun. One story in particular was extremely scary and because Kai was next to me, I would hide behind him.

"Sorry, it's a little scary." I say behind him. "Its not a problem, you can use me to hide from the stories anytime." He smiles. I smile back and sit back up in my seat. I grab his arm sometimes and probably squeezed it really hard but he always put his hand on top of mine to comfort me. "주연아, 깜짝 얘기를 할까?" 백현 said quietly to me. "Uhh... 알았어, what is it?" I say. "I- uh I justed wanted to say sorry... what I did was really out of line and I didn't know it was your first kiss and-" "It's fine. I don't really want to talk about it. Let's just out this behind us and forget like it never happened. When we're back to normal, we might even laugh about and say it was a great memory." "Thanks 주연아, 우리 다시 친구이지?" "응, 그럼... 친구." He smiles and we link arms and skip back to the campsite. "Wait, you and 종인 had like multiple moments during the story time." He grins sneakily. "That was cuz I was scared." "You were scared?! You? I mean makes sense." I hit him hard enough so that it will hurt. "Ouch... just stating the facts." He mumbles. I glare at him. "와, 이 분위기가 진짜 밖였어. What happened between you two?" Chanyeol notices as we get back. "We fought... okay well not fought, but an obstacle was placed, we jumped. And here we are." I say. I hear 경수 whisper to 찬열, "what is this metaphor?" "No idea." He shrugs.

Masterlist

[leoninapelliolovesconchitawurst]

ENGLISH TRANSLATION (by me)

LOSDELAMUSICA.COM 19/11/20

https://www.losdelamusica.com/articulo/conchita-wurst-me-encantaria-colaborar-con-ruth-lorenzo-amo-tanto-a-ruth-y-es-tan-gran-artista

Conchita Wurst: "I would love to collaborate with Ruth Lorenzo, I love Ruth so much and she is such a great artist!"

Conchita Wurst is back and she's never gone. It has changed and evolved since we heard “Rise like a Phoenix”. Now behind her is also Tom, who is embarking on all kinds of projects, like his recent collaboration with Ricky Merino on "Smalltown Boy".

We had the pleasure of interviewing Conchita and below we have his answers on his appearance at Eurovision, his new album, his new stage as presenter and some curiosities like his dreams to be realized.

After your stint and your victory at Eurovision in 2014, now that time has passed, how has that influenced your new music? Are you still seeing as much impact?

I believe that all musical development is an evolution and that everything that comes from the past influences the present and the future. Winning the Eurovision Song Contest and all the attention that came with it allowed me to live the life I live today. And I think I felt a lot of pressure at first to be perfect and do everything right, and now a few years later I feel more mature and genuine and I have no intention of thinking about what other people might think. I'm just doing my thing.

“Truth Over Magnitude”, T.O.M, what does this record mean to you? Why does it have the initials of your name (Tom)?

It means that I appreciate the truth and being myself more than the celebrity. You understand? Being famous or a celebrity is fun and all, but in the end it doesn't mean anything to me. It's no good if you don't live the life you want to live. "Truth Over Magnitude" is very personal, so it fits very good as an album name, and abbreviated as TOM, it also shows that this album is much more my personal self than Conchita.

Your projects do not end there. You recently launched a collaboration with Ricky Merino, how did you receive the proposal?

I love collaborating with other artists and seeing what we can do together. Ricky contacted me and sent me his version of "Smalltown Boy", which I loved. So of course I said yes when he asked me to record a reissue of the song together.

Is the career or the fame of an artist important for you to collaborate with him?

Obviously it's flattering that a famous person wants to collaborate, but again I think it's “Truth Over Magnitude”. I really wanna like what the other person is doing, I wanna like the voice and the whole vibe, that's more important than the fame. I would never work with a super famous person that I don't like. And I've worked with people in the past who weren't very well known and we still do duets and projects together.

Which other Spanish artist would you collaborate with?

I would love to collaborate with Ruth Lorenzo of course, I love Ruth so much and she is such a great artist! And I think there are so many talented Spanish artists that I don't even know! Send them all to me and we'll do something together! (Laughs)

You also sang with Anastacia, do you want to edit one of her songs in the studio and release it as a single? Which?

I would record all of Anastacia's songs with her! She's an amazing singer, such a kind and friendly person and I think we would have a great time together in the studio!

Why do you think we need an example like you to follow for the LGTBI + collective? Are you proud to be a reference?

I don't like to think of myself as a point of reference, honestly, and I've never seen myself as an example. I like to think of myself as a guy who does his thing. But yeah, sure, I know I'm an example in people's heads, not mine.

Hope a lot of people will see that you can do whatever you want as long as you don't hurt others. If you want to be a bearded woman, be a bearded woman. If you don't want to be the bearded lady anymore and want to make electronic music, then do it. You only have one life, and I hope that's what people see in me: the motivation to love their own life and their fantasies.

You also worked as a presenter this 2020 on German TV, what about the experience in 'Fame Maker'?

You know? I love hosting TV shows especially when they're live because it's so much more fun than pre-recording and recording stuff over and over again. And “Fame Maker” was the first live concert I did this year where there was a real audience, it was also very nice. Having instant reactions is very important, not only for me as a presenter, but also for the jury, the artists and the entire production team.

Being a program where you can see but not hear, does the image matter more or are there other deciding factors?

Seeing the artists without listening to them was really interesting and fun. Of course, it also makes you aware of how quickly we judge someone by seeing them for a few seconds. But you can't see the talent, you can't see people who can really sing and have a great voice.

You might be able to see if they have some experience on stage. But it was also the fun of this show, anyone could guess it and it was full of surprises all the time!

How important is the image to you?

Image in the sense of how you look, your hair, what you wear is of course very important in the entertainment industry. Not just in situations like a cover shoot or during a three minute live TV show.

I think everyone knows what it feels like to look in the mirror and say, “Wow! Today I love myself a lot ”, that gives you a lot of confidence. Likewise, we all have days when we feel like wearing jogging pants and not leaving the house. I think the appearance and image can help a lot with the confidence and the way other people notice you. Use them to your advantage!

And now that it seems like every dream is impossible, do you see yourself in the middle of the Super Bowl in a few years? You would like it?

Haha, they still haven't called me! Of course, the Super Bowl is one of the greatest entertainment shows in the world and every year we see how Americans are crazy about having a massive experience.

At the same time, I like to watch the Eurovision Song Contest because, if we're being honest, it's our European Super Bowl and we don't have to watch a lot of sports to finally enjoy it. (Laughs)

What can we expect from Wurst in the short term?

With the pandemic, it has been a very difficult year for artists around the world, and I fear it will still be some time before we can enjoy concerts with crowded audiences. The closures in Austria have made me think about things I would like to do in the future, I have been working on some creative projects and looking forward to sharing them with my fans, when possible.

But don't be fooled, of course I also spent days at home doing nothing and being lazy; I think it's also something that unites us all. It's also okay to be lazy sometimes.

Thank you very much for your closeness and for answering questions so extensively, Conchita. We wish you good luck and success.

Check out the latest single with Ricky Merino on 'Smalltown Boy' below, then one of Tom's most recent singles, 'Hit me':

[hollyhomburg]

21 questions tag!

i was tagged by @gimmesumsuga (thank you bean @-@ hope your editing and writing is going well these days!! super excited for STS! sure it will be amazing as always!) 

nickname. my mom has always called me Rosie, or Rosebud and my older brother and most everyone else calls me by an abbreviated version of my full name. but I like Rosie the best! the people at my mom’s work legit think that my full name is Rosie when it’s only my middle name! 

zodiac. Libra sun w/Scorpio moon 

height. 5′3 

hogwarts. Ravenclaw- I'm a dreamer! 

the last thing I googled. “find all solutions to the equation rad3/2″ I had math homework last night T-T

favorite musicians. BTS! Dawn, TXT, Taylor swift, Jackson wang (really got7 thought- but his solo stuff is at a different tier) really into Joji and 88 rising at the moment! 

song stuck in my head. Currently Yeonjun’s part from runaway “I don't wanna wake up” is v stuck in my head

following. 656- though admittedly I have never gone through and unfollowed people and I’ve been on Tumblr for 6+ years. 

followers. 11,607 

do you get asks. I get a bunch every week- I would wish to get more- if the truth was that in reality I can’t give everyone who comes into my inbox the time to answer their questions, and hear their woes. its always been one of the things I’ve struggled with. because sometimes I get like- emotionally overwhelmed by the people coming into my ask box wanting to talk? i wish it wasn’t that way but sometimes I just...can't give them what they want you know? 

amount of sleep. lol it depends, I have really interrupted sleep, I probably lie in bed for close to 8 hours every night but only sleep 5-6. 

what are you wearing. leggings, Adidas, a big white shirt that almost goes down to my knees, and a puffy winter coat that’s longer. the student center is so cold T-T

dream job. I would absolutely love to be a writer one day. I don’t think a single thing will make me happier than to wake up every morning and write for 8 hours.  

dream trip. I would absolutely love to drive cross country- I know that seems a little strange when the whole world is out there- but I've been to a lot of places already and I just love the idea of going on a road trip with someone I love. 

instruments. I have an okay singing voice, though it is admittedly adapted well for jazz and folk music- I can do a mean rendition of ‘late July’ by shakey graves, and cry me a river. 

languages. English and french, though I’m learning Spanish rn! 

favorite songs. Cypher pt 4 will always be my favorite bts song.

if you were an animal, what would you be. This cat that peeachy pop sent me the other day

favorite food. pomegranates, fage yogurt, and anything with sour cream.  

random fact. I have a scar on my upper lip from being attacked by a dog when I was little- it's really small and people usually don't notice it unless I show them

my aesthetic. a sweater that seems softer than you thought it would be. neon tempered nighttime. The first blush of color that hits the sky in the morning, birdsong on a cold morning, the feeling of someone else running their fingers through your hair. And when people say something like “I wonder why it always seems to rain on the weekends” I'm the person who turns to them and asks “do you want to know why?”

↳ Tagging: @peeachypop @it-is-dana @sope-and-shine 

[rainywritingsx]

Torn • BNHA X OC • Chapter 1

You can find the prologue here. I thought posting the first chapter would be fun too and I’m thinking of updating the fanfiction weekly if people really like it. Please let me know what you think! Leave a like or reblog if you enjoyed it please. I think that’s it, enjoy reading and I hope you have a wonderful day!!

xxx admin rainbow

Words: 1622

“I don’t think you realise how dangerous you could be.” My twin brother smirked as we made our way to school.

"Seventy percent of the human body consist of water, and you have the ability to control any fluid in the universe! You can basically make the whole world your slaves if you train your quirk enough." I sighed softly, not feeling the need to reply to his boring words that I'd probably heard a million times already. I was born with this power, did he think I wouldn't have figured that out after fourteen years?

I mean how couldn't I, when my father, despite my mother's protests, had been training me since I was four up until this year, because according to him training at school would be enough.

"Mom and dad will be so proud when you can finally go into the field too, Janie." He said, his voice dripping with pride and

excitement for my future. I, however, wasn't as interested in that, I must say. But I didn't say that out loud of course, due to the fact that I know that's not what he'd like to hear and I wasn't in the mood to argue with him right now. Not like I ever was in the mood to do that.

You see, unlike my younger siblings, I had the big responsibility which would be given to me as soon as I became the new leader of the so-called 'villain world', which would most likely happen as soon as my parents decided to stop - that would take a while considering they found their job absolutely lovely. Any villain would've been stoked for something like this, but me? I despised it from the day I was born.

Yes, there was a very small proportion of 'villains' that actually had some rational ideals, like them not agreeing with some situations though they were seen as 'right'. For example: Stain, the hero killer, didn't have the worst ideas in my opinion. He didn't agree with the fact that some heroes didn't become heroes with the intent of helping people. All they wanted was fame and glory. He decided to kill anyone he deemed unworthy of being a hero and kept the worthy ones alive. So, yes, his way of handling them was a completely different case but he had some decent morals.

However, the majority of this community was filled with people who just wanted to inflict pain on others, see their terrified faces before taking away possessions or sometimes even their lives. I did not want to associate myself with people like that.

And those were the exact kind of villains my parents were. As parents, they were just normal people but everyone knew both went ballistic during fights against heroes. There were some stories of heroes who could still hear my mother's psychotic laugh as she killed their allies. My dad would always look his victims right in the eye as he did whatever he wanted to do. I can't even imagine the amount of sins that they must've committed.

They expected me to be at least as crazy as them when I took over, but I wasn't even planning on becoming a villain at all. Even if some villains had ideas that seemed okay, it didn't make up for their actions. I wanted to become a hero and whether I'd become famous or not didn't matter to me. Helping people was all I wanted to do. However, we should put the emphasis on "wanted". I couldn't become a hero, my whole family would consider me absolutely insane.

We entered the school and parted our ways since we had different classes until lunch break. I never minded that, to be completely honest. We weren't the type of siblings that couldn't live without each other. I didn't have that relationship with any of my siblings. (I've got three younger brothers, I'm thirteen minutes older than my twin brother so yes I'd consider myself older, the others are twelve and ten.) Sure, we all cared about each other but we didn't have the tight bond some siblings do have. I thought that that was partly due to my parents, who never really let us do things together to get closer to each other. It was only when we got older that we started doing some things together. Maybe it was also due to our ideals being different but of course he didn't know that.

As for my two other younger siblings, they were a lot closer to each other so there never really was a need for them to have this really tight bond with my brother and I. Those two were completely fine as a duo.

I entered the classroom, not saying a word as I walked over to my seat. I also never really bonded with my class either. It didn't have to do with what I though, but more because of the fact that I was the daughter of the two most notorious villains ever. Nobody would ever talk to me and I had the tendency to be quite shy at first, so I never took the first step either.

"Alright everyone! Please open your books, classes will start now!" Our English and homeroom teacher, miss Deceit said with a bright smile on her face in the same annoyingly high tone she always used. "Today's lesson will be really exciting!" Maybe her name gave it away already, but she was a teacher who was great at creating illusions. After training for years and years, she could make someone's biggest fear and taunt people with those images. And people tend to do strange things when they're absolutely terrified... Sometimes a slightly less deathly version of that is used as a punishment for students, but only in very extreme cases. Now that she had reached an older age, she mostly used her quirk to make classes more fun than they actually are and the majority falls for it, but my parents taught me how to deal with quirks like that so it almost became like a reflex that I saw right through it.

And if you were wondering how on earth some of these villains were able to even set a foot in the outside world, there were two answers: serving in jail and fake identities. Some villains were able to get away with certain crimes and that way they got a shorter sentence, so after they served in jail they could just return to society. Other villains made fake identities and at my school they never turned people to the police. 'Villain code' is what they call it. You help other villains when they need it but you never ever call the cops on them.

The day seemed to last forever, but after villain training I could finally go home. I almost ran out of class, not wanting to spend another second with these people. My brother finished early today and went away to hang out with some of his friends, so I was on my own. It wasn't like I missed much though, no offence to him.

I frowned when I noticed a big sign set on the usual path I took to my home. It said that work was being done on the road, which meant I had to take a different road, a longer one sadly. I sighed quietly and then continued walking again. Before I could think my feet stopped on their own, making me almost fall in surprise. I looked up and gasped when I noticed it.

UA high.

The school I had admired since I was a small child, because that was the school where heroes were made. If you wanted to become a hero, you knew you just had to attend UA.

My eyes became wide when I noticed huge banners hanging. Today, and only today, they would let potential new students in and take a look in the building, like classrooms etc so they could see what to expect. I tilted my head in slight confusion. Why was this done though? UA wasn't a very open school at all, barely letting any students in. I wasn't complaining though..

Then a thought struck me. Wouldn't it be strange if I came home late? I usually got home at the same time every day so it would seem odd... But then again, I was usually the first in my family to arrive since my parents' "working hours" varied and my siblings usually hung out in places after school. I'd just go to look at the school and find an excuse later.

My excitement grew with each step I took, realising I was getting closer to the school I could only dream of even seeing. The school was huge and from the start the whole atmosphere was just completely different from what I was used to in my school. It felt like one community, whereas my school was just a mix of small groups who didn't really bother to talk to other people, let alone make other friends. Maybe I could actually make some friends here...if I was even able to attend the school at all. My parents wouldn't ever approve of this in a million years of course.

Okay, I'd just take a look. Nothing more or less. Looking wasn't a bad thing for sure so why was I worried about them not approving of it? I wouldn't attend the school anyway, nope. It was totally fine, I'd be there for a few minutes and then gone before anyone could notice. Yes. I'd do that.

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[baekhvuns]

Yes I definitely feel like I would have better conversations with Mingi and Yeosang if I had more time! I mean I still enjoyed our talks, but they're more mysterious you know? They're not like Hongjoong who's constantly talking about something on Universe, they don't talk about childhood stories like Hwa or have no filter whatsoever like Woo. Ahhhhh Yeosang, I mean... my bias line is a difficult topic, I used to say I was Sanhwa biased but Seonghwa got promoted to ult, Hongjoong was always there because he was the first one who grabbed my attention, but HJ was more like a wrecker I guess? Then angel boy Yeosang from ZFP1 made me go 👁👁 just to get whiplash when Fireworks then DV happened, lol. I had Yeosang vision for a moment, so I guess he's kinda a wrecker too? Because he made me forget about San and Hongjoong for a while 🙈

Hsudheahhddhhs I'm not in the UK and I'm glad, because the shitshow is ridiculous and infuriating. I feel so bad for my friends in London 😭Also I'm self-employed so no holidays for me anyways 🥴

That pizza place is so pretty, but it's in Rome? I've heard about it, but never been!

Noooo, poor Yunho lmao, not you imagining Hwa in his place, byeeeee. Okay but I sometimes read fanfiction and imagine it's about someone else 😅 and with Seonghwa it's great cause he had so many hair colours even when people describe the hair Seonghwa usually fits no matter what 😅😅😅😅

I'll give you benefit of a doubt with that fic, but I bet I'll regret it.... booking my ticket to Canada rn.

Yes that volunteering and kids thing with Seonghwa I think there's a fic that explored it a bit? It's called Blacklist if I'm not mistaken. But it's not focused on that topic entirely, I would love to read one for sure. 👀

Great minds think (or simp) alike yes please let the drama be less annoying than TB, justice for Jae Young lmaooo, I feel like he might be an asshole but oh well...

Nose presentation hit hard didn't it? I just can't believe he's roaming free with that snake tongue. Here have something cute and IN MY POCKET YOU GO. Oooooh Sexy of them

My uber driver posted a soft thirst trap and Lizzie d-worded a coincidence?

Girrrrrl I have so many mangas, I have both English and Japanese versions, had different languages in the past but sold them. Usui as Hwa, yes. Also have you seen Horimiya, because imagine Seonghwa looking like that . Also waiting for the adaptation of The Ice Guy and His Cool Female Colleague, yes gonna headcanon the guy as Hwa and no one can stop me! - DV 💖

hi hello!!

Yes I definitely feel like I would have better conversations with Mingi and Yeosang if I had more time! I mean I still enjoyed our talks, but they're more mysterious you know? They're not like Hongjoong who's constantly talking about something on Universe, they don't talk about childhood stories like Hwa or have no filter whatsoever like Woo. Ahhhhh Yeosang, I mean... my bias line is a difficult topic, I used to say I was Sanhwa biased but Seonghwa got promoted to ult, Hongjoong was always there because he was the first one who grabbed my attention, but HJ was more like a wrecker I guess? Then angel boy Yeosang from ZFP1 made me go 👁👁 just to get whiplash when Fireworks then DV happened, lol. I had Yeosang vision for a moment, so I guess he's kinda a wrecker too? Because he made me forget about San and Hongjoong for a while 🙈

they do seem more quiet and mysterious, def would have some interesting convos,,, yeosang would def teach swearing <3 bfbbdhb i WOULD PAY TO HEAR SEONGHWA RAMBLE ABOUT HIS CHILDHOOD STORIES,, i KNEW u were a sanhwa biased BUT DIDNT EXPECT YEOSANG AT ALL,, maybe mingi but def not yeo AAAA I AGREE I AGREE THAT YEOSANG,, esp that black haired one >>>>>>

Hsudheahhddhhs I'm not in the UK and I'm glad, because the shitshow is ridiculous and infuriating. I feel so bad for my friends in London 😭Also I'm self-employed so no holidays for me anyways 🥴

i tbh like watching it bc it's such a historical moment and ur probably never seeing it until like 20-15 years until charles,, but i do think it's a shitshow with the #'s and the dude getting pulled by police bc he yelled at andr3w??? he dESERVED TO BE YELLED AT

That pizza place is so pretty, but it's in Rome? I've heard about it, but never been!

is it?? GFJREG IM SORRY IT SAID MALTA ON IT AND I WAS LIKE DV ANON !!!!! KEYHOLE !!!!

Noooo, poor Yunho lmao, not you imagining Hwa in his place, byeeeee. Okay but I sometimes read fanfiction and imagine it's about someone else 😅 and with Seonghwa it's great cause he had so many hair colours even when people describe the hair Seonghwa usually fits no matter what 😅😅😅😅

unfortunately it is going that way fbga poor guy bc the next fic is also seonghwa and now i keep writing this yun as him,, peak shinesta,, YOOO UR RIGHT THE HAIR FITS MY MIND AUTOMATICALLY CLICKS TO HIM

I'll give you benefit of a doubt with that fic, but I bet I'll regret it.... booking my ticket to Canada rn.

LMFAOOOO I HOPE U LIKE IT, AND PLS DO I AM WAITING @ THE AIRPORT WITH A SIGN

Yes that volunteering and kids thing with Seonghwa I think there's a fic that explored it a bit? It's called Blacklist if I'm not mistaken. But it's not focused on that topic entirely, I would love to read one for sure. 👀

oh????? OH??? IM ABOUT TO GO READ,,,, 👀 id be very into writing that actually, do u rmr the movie life as we know it? maybe like that???

Great minds think (or simp) alike yes please let the drama be less annoying than TB, justice for Jae Young lmaooo, I feel like he might be an asshole but oh well...

FHGJAKRG UR RIGHT,,, jaeyoung better not be an asshole bc the other guy already kinda really fine and im into that little ceo bc bfgdhj the arrange marriage fic hwa is a little similar to that gu <3

Nose presentation hit hard didn't it? I just can't believe he's roaming free with that snake tongue. Here have something cute and IN MY POCKET YOU GO. Oooooh Sexy of them

nose presentation hit me in the ribs, kicked me in the knee, punched me in the face. LMFAOOOOO STOP I SCREAME DGFSDFG SNAKE TONGUE PLSSS,,, u know that angle,, in the first video,,, im sorry. wow. fdhbsdhf

My uber driver posted a soft thirst trap and Lizzie d-worded a coincidence?

soft thirstrap,, if they drop a whole full front for his vogue im suddenly lizzie. daily uber + 2

Girrrrrl I have so many mangas, I have both English and Japanese versions, had different languages in the past but sold them. Usui as Hwa, yes. Also have you seen Horimiya, because imagine Seonghwa looking like that . Also waiting for the adaptation of The Ice Guy and His Cool Female Colleague, yes gonna headcanon the guy as Hwa and no one can stop me! - DV 💖

SEONGHWA AS USUI IS AN ABSOLUTE MUST,,,annoying mf,, YES I HAVE and,,, the long haired hwa from dv era with that lip ring haha if we see this during the concert time u best believing iM GOING TO RUN OFF A CLIFF,,, HELLO THAT ANIME LOOKS SO GOOD??? im about to watch this for science reasons. that ice guy hwa is this hwa

ur opinion on this and miss doja

also bff if u have been watching big mouth, ur thoughts on it rn

cried just a little