#and the separation IS so important. bc it helps so much. in exploring things i typically Couldn't.

[moe-broey]

Also Moe gender notes/lore:

It has a more masc leaning identity, and typically uses masculine language/titles but more like. For fun. Like the way you say "SIR." at a misbehaving cat. It will also call itself a man ESP if it's funny. Also I've been toying w it liking the terms "boyfriend"/"boytoy" for itself, which is a very funny combination w Alfonse (in my mind) preferring the term "partner" (broadly, but also esp for himself). So like, Moe calling Alfonse "My partner" and Alfonse, On Occasion, ESPP if the situation calls for it, calling Moe "My boyfriend" (still, partner is the preferred term across the board for both of them -- but if we need to clear up the air...)

BUT ALSO! There are at least, so far, Two cases where Moe prefers feminine titles/language!

One was initially a misunderstanding but it ultimately ended up preferring the term anyway, with "cleric" (one comic idea is to resolve this castle dialogue):

LIBRA.... I WOULD NEVER .......... (Moe didn't realize "cleric" was a femme-gendered term, and had already been using it for itself for a while at this point.)

The other title is "seamstress"! That one is a case of Knowing the genderedness of it, but deciding to use it in a nonconforming way (which is eventually how "cleric" ended up). To me Moe uses these in the same vein as a drag queen, if that makes sense!

[sourcengine]

tumblr is NOT letting me answer this ask directly for some reason so i screencapped it HDFHDG anyways here goes

i vagguelly knew abt otherkin stuff beforehand but that was like. very vague and more in the lense of "eww cringe" bc that was all that was talked abt it

fast forward to me being 16 or so (maybe 17?) and i decide that today on www.tumblr.com im gonna go through the werewolf tag, and between all the art and poems abt werewolves i view a few werewolfkin posts and i go "huh.. thats interesting" bc i only vaguely heard of it but never really looked into it

so i dip my toes into it, and fall into the lake completely, and now im here

from which i will give some advice:

disclaimer: most of this advice comes from a psychological kin perspective, for spiritual stuff i can gather some info if you ask me but overall im not spiritual kin

1: sometimes the answer is not too clear, being alterhuman can stem from many reasons and overlap with many other things, furryness, autism, psychosis, spiritual beliefs, familiarity and importance to an animal or myth, a lot can play into it! for some beings, the experiences are very separate from each other, for others, they may cause each other or be linked or overlap, it can all depend and change around, so dont stress too much on whats what, but if you wish, you can play around and see what belongs to what, ive had the fact im a furry sometimes overlap with the fact im otherkin, and even fuel each other, but i still see them as separate identities, its all a big complicated soup. and i will say to just fuck around and see what labels you see fit

figuring out your kintype can take a while, and its not uncommon that what you first consider to be your kintype may not be the one that you actually feel you are. for example my first through upon discovering kin stuff was that i may be a cat, ive loved cats since i was practically born, ive always wanted to be a cat and themed myself around cats, hell my fursona is a cat! turns out im not one, ive tried and figured stuff out and experimented and well a cat just wasnt it. from this i'd just say to explore different animals or mythic beasts or types of robot etc etc

from that, what has helped me personally to figure out kintype stuff is to see what you desire feel and act, what kind of environment do you crave for? forests? mountains? deserts? theres a lot! what do you wish your body looked like? everyone talks about wanting claws and fangs and such but really think about it, what do you want for your body? what would make you happier? what would make you see your body more as your true self? any particular diet you have or wish to have? any behaviors you've derived from a being? maybe you hiss maybe you bark maybe you knead. do you feel limbs that arent there? such as ears? tails? horns? just look around outside and inside to see what you crave what you do what you want and such

one thing that i did while trying to figure out kin stuff was to just. draw how i view myself in my mind, and not concentrate on design or what i like and dislike on character designs, just like, draw what comes to mind on an "ideal body", you shift around features from the vague idea of who you are in your mind, draw different tails draw different snouts draw different body shapes, and see what fits and sticks, sometimes you can land on yes "thats exactly me", sometimes you can land on "its a vague idea of me but can aid me in figuring it out". thats kinda how it lead to me figuring out im primatekin, i had multiple different attempts and sketches of what i think i look like in my mind, and i just kept going until much trial and error later i found something. it went from "humanoid?" to "halfly animal-like" to "has a long tail" to "small and expressive" and eventually to a primate! (and thats how my mizamonkey design came to be QSHFHD). again for some this may bring a concrete design while to others it may be just a vague guide, not every tip works for everyone.

despite a few points ago where i stated that being obsessed with an animal or myth doesnt always equal to it being your kintype, it sometimes can be! and its sometimes how kintypes can originate to people (if we're taking the psychological otherkin route, this doesnt work too well with spiritual otherkin). sometimes youre just so obsessed and interested with an animal or myth or fiction trope that your brain kinda, adopts it for your identity. this is what happened to me for werewolves, since i was a wee lad ive been OBSESSED with werewolves and i read about them and drew about them and made stories about them that my brain has seemingly just. grabbed it and went "thats you". so look into your childhood or current state of living and see what animals and beings and such you connect with! again just as a few points ago, it doesnt always mean its your kintype, but it can be!

being alterhuman is different for everyone, i sometimes still think of this message i saw ages ago that went "ask 10 therians what being a therian means for them, and you get 11 different answers", so just because this otherkin experiences xyz, doesnt mean everyone does, and vice versa! i used to have a lot of stress about this bc i felt like i was a faker bc i didnt experience like others but after a while i managed to mellow out on it and its making me feel better!

related to that i would be careful about the resources you seek out bc from my experience seeking out resources has been a very 50/50, some tips and advice is great! while others are just why would you follow that. use your critical mind and see what suits you and what helps you.

this is more a personal opinion but i feel like the whole "choosing your kintype" debacle doesnt have a correct and concrete answer. to me if you were to just choose whatever kintype you want it may not actually be the kintype you feel like you are. i would absolutely choose to be a wolverine if i could! but it just doesnt align with my kintype and i cant force it as my kintype even if i tried. i would say that you can "try out" kintypes to see if it fits, its all about experimenting after all. its just that for most, its not as easy as pick and choose. its mainly bc your freely chosen kintype may just not be who you are, if you wanna choose a kintype either way, the community has adopted the term "copinglink" for such. for most alterhumans they did not choose their kintype. again its about trial and error

overall its going to be a lot of trial and error to figure stuff out. it took me 2 years to finally land on my proper kintypes! you may find kintypes and you may drop them. you may find yourself to not be otherkin after all! if you want more personal tips and questions you can message me here or on discord! (but i prefer discord bc tumblrs dm system is kinda cramped and buggy).

[romanarose]

More Triple Frontier thoughts: Santi

I'll have a part for all of them and things I've noticed

So I rewatched TF on Wednesday and REALLY paid attention to it and I gotta say, I really got what y'all mean with Santiago being manipulative this time. I mean, I got it before to some degree (in LaL, we explore that a little bit) but know that I feel I have a deeper understanding of all the characters (Yes, including Tom, I'll have a part for him too.) I feel I see how exactly he played all of them.

He texts the idea to Frankie and the Millers and apparently none of them replied. Santi says he went to will first is interesting, and Will says he'll go if Tom does. Interesting.

But Tom, Tom's the one who decides if this is happening or not. It's possible that Benny could have gone without Tom's go, since he accepted the mission without asking any questions about who was going, but I don't know if Will would talk him down. Benny respects his brother a lot as a brother, team member and his coach.

We see initially in the locker room scene, Frankie tries to say no, Will is waiting on Tom's approval, Benny says yes.

Frankie says why he can't go. He has a baby and his lady doesn't like it. Santi immediately goes for Frankie's soft spot, his baby, saying the money they'll get will help with the baby. Frankie is a soft no.

But when Tom's in the room that changes. Noticed how as they approach the bleachers, the conversation is strictly between Tom and Santi. Frankie is the third wheel. Will, after talking to Ben, asks what the verdict is.

The decision to go or not depends on Tom.

Tom says yes, and you see Will dodge his eyes to the side a few times. They ask Frankie if he's in, he asks when they leave, Thursday, he sighs and agrees with no further convincing. In Frankie's analysis I'll go more into him and Tom.

I don't know if Santi knew how much weight Tom's voice had, if he did him talking to them away from Tom was an interesting choice, but in the end he knew Tom was the one he needed to convince. Tom and Will were the two he talked to separately.

When it came time that Santi admitted he lied, after all the drinks and he's trying to convince them to stay, he goes for the jugular on all of them.

Tom, he goes for his masculinity. Tom's character is the essence of toxic masculinity and we'll explore that more in his discussion, but he is a father and clearly does care for his daughters, and Santi points out he can't afford to send them to college. Oof.

He wasn't going to mention the baby thing again, because now he's got a new item in his armory. Coke and suspension. Now I'm not saying that him losing his license was more important than his daughter but it what it represents. 1. his ability to provide. What is Frnakie doing right now that he's not flying? Is he able to contribute to his family, to his daughter financially? That can really wound a man's pride. I do not mean that as a bad thing. But also, flying is where he's obviously in control. That will be explored in his part. Santi knows how much flying means to him. Now, the coke... did the others know? Because Santi didn't until the hallway. Could the others hear him, because he was muttering. They knew he was on coke I think bc santi wasn't surprised, but that the bust was drug related? I dont know. But it's a hell of thing to mention.

Benny was a two for one

In the retcon scene, we hear Benny mention a job stocking shelves at walmart. Was this in high school? after the army? Now? Most fighters do it part time, like trying to get a singing carrier off the ground.. was Benjamin Miller, a "one in a million talent" stocking shelves at walmart? Im not saying there anything wrong with that, I find a lot of pride myself working at olive garden, but is Benny humiliated? Either way, we know he's proud of his fighting, takes it very seriously, and Santi's words (an insinuating he lost) doesn't fair well for Ben. I think Santi insinuated he lost on purpose to get riled up.

And Will... What do we know about Will? Not much. But we know he has Benny, he loves Benny. Benny is his focus. Santi knows that William is not happy about Benny's fighting. Thats probably why he's his coach, doesn't trust anyone else to do it or to bandage him up after. Will doesn't have kids to look after, to protect... but he has Ben, and from what I see, Ben is his number one priority. Asking if he wants to see Ben get beat up all the time was manipulative because of course he does! He loves him!

I find it interesting with Will and Frankie he changed up his tactics to go with new information he got in the locker room/ hallway.

Now, all this to say

I DO NOT THINK SANTI IS GREEDY!

I think he's desperate!

I won't say the money wasn't a motivator but it's SO CLEAR his primary target was Lorea!

He was constantly reminding them "I want Lorea"

"I want one more sweep for Lorea"

Once Will was shot, it was Santi that said "we take a backpack and head to the jungle, ill cover the costs"

The cost didn't matter because Santi was getting out. He got Lorea and he was done. He could rest his legs and neck in PEACE.

So yeah, Santi is manipulative. Definitely. But he's not a greedy asshole.

And no. Frankie is not perfect. Let's talk about that next.

(I love them all minus Tom. I've watched this movie too many times. I adore them. They are my kids. But they are all flawed.)

[altruistic-meme]

Okay i was originally going to try to make a nice and neat little post about heartstopper and some of my thoughts, as well as a separate post about what i like about the comics vs. the tv show. 

Uh. So. I can’t actually corral my thoughts to be coherent enough for that, so here are some various assorted thoughts about it all instead <3 put under a cut bc it is long and rambley and a mess

[spoiler warning for the comics if you haven't read them]

Idk what it is, but I love comic Charlie a LOT. Like. A LOT a lot. There is just something about his character in the comics, his banter, the way he behaves that I love so much more in the comics than the show. I feel almost like the characters aren’t quite the same person, though I do love them both. I just connected so much more with comic Charlie.

Semi-related but I also feel like we get a much more clear picture of his OCD and the attached anxieties in the comics. 

HMMM okay or maybe not. Idk. I think maybe we can see more of Charlie’s OCD in the show through his desire to make everything easy and perfect for Nick, even when it hurts him too. 

He’s popular in the comics!!! It’s mentioned multiple times by other characters that Charlie is popular at school!!! And I think that’s actually a really interesting look at his character. He was bullied for most of y9 and yet the rugby lads think he’s a popular kid in y10. Despite this, we don’t actually see Charlie interacting with basically anyone but the other main characters, and I think that kind of reflects how Charlie views himself. On the way back from Paris, he asks Nick “does this mean I’m a cool kid now?” he doesn’t think people see him as cool but like I said, other characters have said he’s popular. They must have gotten that idea from SOMEWHERE right? But Charlie’s own poor self-esteem means he still doesn’t actually believe he’s cool or that people like him. I don’t know if there was a point to this rant but. Charlie is a popular boy.

I WANT TO KNOW MORE ABOUT THE KIDS WHO STOPPED THE BULLYING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Also, in the comics Charlie really is a nerd in a way he isn’t in the show. He helps Nick with his math and yells at him for distracting him from his homework. I get why this change happened in the show–it gives us a better idea of the strained relationship that Charlie has with his mom while also showing us that his dad tries to support him but often fails–but I really like it in the comics because Nick calls him a nerd but it’s less obvious in the show how nerdy he really is. 

That said obviously I also ADORE getting to explore the other characters and their lives and everything in the show. I love getting to see more of them. (But I also love how we DON’T always get all the information in the comics, but that’s just because I love when there are background stories happening that we don’t see through the main storyline. This event/love is not unique to Heartstopper) 

I love Imogen!!! I really like that it’s showing her as someone who is sort trying to become friends with the group and that isn’t always a fast or easy process. She goes to the sleepover with them and she hangs out with them in Paris, but she’s doesn’t leave Prom with them or anything. Also, I love the possibility that she is discovering that she’s queer too!! And that her halfway joining of their friend group leads to her discovering herself bc i feel like that’s so true to real life.

I am so curious about the Isaac vs. Aled thing and I wonder if Aled will appear in one of the later seasons, or if he is just not in the show at all. And Isaac! I assume he’s in some extra content I haven’t seen? Don’t get me wrong ofc, I love Isaac and his storyline is SO SO IMPORTANT as someone who is asexual myself. I am so glad that there is the representation of someone discovering that they’re aroace. I do assume that’s part of the reason for him being the 4th friend as opposed to Aled? Idk. 

I’M SO SAD ABOUT OLIVER BEING COMPLETELY OMITTED FROM THE SHOW!!! I assume there is an interview or something where Alice Oseman explains why Oliver wasn’t in the show, but I haven’t seen it and rn I will simply cry about it. I love him and I wish he had been included. 

I am also SO CURIOUS how the rest of the show will look!! I know that I read somewhere that s3 should be the contents of book 4, and that s4/s5 if they get them would be books 5/6 respectively. And I’m so intrigued. Because book 4 is the heaviest of them all so far, and I wonder how it will be translated to the screen. Especially the Sept-Dec timeskip! Will we see that time, especially considering the other character’s storylines??? This wasn’t an issue in the comics since they focus solely on Nick/Charlie, but with all of the other characters it would be more difficult to just skip that whole time. Will it just be a summary of events like in the comics, with flashes to what has happened? Or will we get a more explicit idea of everything?? (probably not including Charlie’s sh relapses or the night in October, but maybe the This Winter content???) i am SO excited for October though so all my questions can be answered :’)

OH something that was super interesting to me was a very small change in dialogue during the scene where Charlie first tells Nick about his sh. In the show, when Nick asks if he still does it Charlie just says “No.” but in the comics he says “No! I mean- hardly ever” and it’s such a small change but it speaks volumes too in the difference between the comic and the show. I’m not really sure what it’s saying though. Was show Charlie just more consistently in a better place where he feels like it’s stopped and won’t happen again? Was comic Charlie just more honest in this moment in acknowledging that it has still happened since? I’m not sure!!! But i’ve spent WAYYY too much time thinking about this one tiny change in dialogue!!!

Another thing is like, I really liked how the comics handled Nick’s dad. Them not meeting in Paris and then him missing Nick’s birthday. It really hits hard exactly how negligent he is, and it gives space for Charlie to be there for Nick when he’s upset. I do like how it went in the show as well, because it does still get everything across beautifully, but idk. I think mostly I’m just remembering the shot of Nick opening the door to greet Charlie on his birthday looking heartbroken and upset about his dad canceling and how hard that hit when i first read it. (keep in mind that i watched the show before reading the comics, so i was surprised at first to learn that they didn’t meet up in Paris! Let alone that he missed Nick’s birthday TOO!!)

Okay I think that’s it for right now. I have largely been spinning comic Charlie in the microwave in my mind bc OUGH i relate to him too much. I will probably come back at some point with more thoughts, but until then. Hope you enjoyed my brief insanity.

[itsjaywalkers]

I’m here not only to hit you with a twin Black brothers au but also Slytherin Sirius because Slytherin Sirius is my dearest beloved. He’s just as arrogant and spiteful and intelligent but he’s also so cunning and has big ambitions for his role as heir. He wants the House of Black to remain powerful and wealthy (obviously) but he also intends to make it stand for everything his parents despise.

“Oh Morgan it’s because he’s passionate about muggleborn rights and equality, right?” WRONG HE’S INDIFFERENT TO POLITICS AT BEST! He is passionate about his twin brother though and he’s been scheming to ruin Walburga and Orion’s lives for constantly belittling and misgendering his brother. OBVIOUSLY Regulus is trans; they’re twins and Sirius has know Regulus was trans since forever. Their parents tried to force him to wear dresses and long hair but Sirius always gave Reggie his clothes and chopped his twin’s hair off himself.

And ofc Sirius and James have the most intense and absurd rivalry; in Gryffindor together they’re besties but in separate houses they’re constantly at each other’s throats. It only gets worse when James has the audacity to develop a crush on his twin brother!!! He’d probably be better at cockblocking if James’ very tall and very attractive werewolf friend would stop distracting. (Obvi they know Remus is a werewolf and obviously they end up becoming animagi because anything James Potter can do Sirius and Regulus can do better)

OOOOOOH I LOVE THIS AU VERY MUCH MORGAN <333 i'm a sirius is a gryffindor through and through BUT i do think that he has a lot of slythetin qualities and i think he resembles walburga A Lot in many things so.. i'm always very into stories that make him a slytherin and explore that other side of him.. see what could've been and how different he would've turned out to be..

AND IF HE'S IN SLYTHERIN OFC HE HAS A RIVALRY WITH JAMES GOING ON YOU GET MEEEE their friendship and soulmatism is very important to me but also i genuinely think that if the circumstances had been the slightest bit different . they could've ended up clashing, bc they're too similar sometimes, and stubborn and proud and arrogant in their own ways. so i truly believe that the possibility of them not getting along is very much there (an unpopular opinion i'm aware)

and sirius and reg beiing twins HELL YEAH the crack and the angst material is off the roof.. especially if james is in the equation.. AND REMUS HELPING OUT HIS BESTIE JAMES BUT ALSO GETTING SOMETHING OUT OF IT HIMSELF !!! WHAT HE DESERVES !!!

[dantedeservedbetter]

I don’t think anyone understands just how much I want origin stories of everyone else in Mystreet like they all have really interesting backgrounds that are just tossed to the side of the main plot points (lol abt to be a really long threat again sorry)

Aaron- Didn’t actually get character lore OR a personality until S3 but like I want MORE because tbh I feel like his parents gave him a lot more trauma than what’s shown in the series, and even the stuff IN the actual seasons (the emotional neglect, his military schooling, the tense relationship w/Melissa etc;) are fixed and shoved off like no he might ACTUALLY need therapy bruh PLEASE

Katelyn- I think she was (?) in therapy in the beginning for her anger issues and the loss of her mother but like it was kind of forgotten about tbh. I think she needs more positive moments in the series honestly bc in the later seasons we’re shown she’s partially abusive towards Travis the first time they went out, and ends up being written off as prejudice towards werewolves bc of past experiences??? Naw the Katelyn I know would never do that. AND HER DREAMS OF WORKING IN THEATRE TOO HELLO??? Also, her mom quite literally used her in the Forever Potion experiments as a child?? I feel like that’s important to her character too :/

The Ro’meave Brothers- I don’t actually know where to start tbh because I feel like ALL THREE of them could use some kind of character depth aside from Dumb Blonde, Emo One, and the Forgotten One. Especially Vylad, probably having to witness this entire Lycan situation grow from an outsiders perspective with no contact from his family in forever. It’s shown that Zane is immensely interested in the family business too like hello??? Garroth himself is kind of just written off as a comedic effect most of the time, but he quite literally has no other goals (possibly because he KNOWS he’s going to inherit the business one day whether he cares to or not).

Laurance- He’s not really a character anymore, but from what we’ve actually SEEN in Mystreet he had enough development to become something outside of a potential love interest for Aphmau. He has a fondness for cooking and was seen to be EXCEPTIONAL at it, and I think he still carried an interest in baseball (or idk it was SOME sport asdfghjk the point is he was good). And he was also shown to still help out his family here and there (babysitting Caleb, his baby brother, in numerous episodes). Idk, I feel like there were so many pieces of Laurance that could’ve been explored and touched upon and we hardly got anything. Also… Garrance. Quite literally hate to be that person but it was literally the biggest piece of queerbaiting I’ve ever seen fr I wish it was explored as much as Aarmau was :( (willing to bet the popularity had something to do with what I call the ‘Heartstopper’ treatment but that’s just me tho)

Nana (KC)- The most under appreciated character in-universe I actually had to go and make a separate post about this LOLOL expect it in like five minutes from now bc I just save everything in my drafts.

Travis- Lol no surprise here but him too dude honestly I have no idea where to start with him atm, his entire family’s lore needs a full in depth analysis on themselves because Aphmau’s series just BARELY touches the surface of Travis’s character

Dante/Gene- Honestly BOTH of them were done so dirty I find it funny how no one ever talks abt it because they’re so beautiful to me. Gene already had his redemption arc so I can kind of see why they just tossed him aside but Dante literally had nothing tbh. He had a messy relationship with KC in PDH and then made that same mistake in LLP. Okay, cool, give us more of that. Let him learn from his mistakes and be self aware now. Or better yet let him grow without tossing love interests into the formula in order for it to happen!! Seems like his family life is pretty good though, worst thing abt him was the peanut allergy.

Lucinda- Queen actually has very little to no background that actually centers around her. We know she had a really bad relationship with Ivan but like I’m pretty sure that’s it.

[borrelia]

not-writing sort-of story abt this mornings knuckles thoughts

sonic and tails r up on angel island by request. they had to take the torny 2 bc shes stronger than the tornado and knux requested they bring up shovels and rakes and other implements of destruction. they get up there and knuckles is like. so serious. but visibly This Close to vibrating out of his body with excitement. they gotta climb up to a secondary location and knuckles is keeping a tight lip about exactly what it is they're doing.

they climb up, takes almost a full day since they r lugging this equipment up, can't take the speedy shortcuts. there's overgrown areas they gotta chop through with a machete, recent landslidea they gotta circumnavigate, crying chao they gotta rescue from Fell In A Hole :(. thet get there, set up camp a little ways away, and knuckles leads them through this stone-carved entrance, worn and crumbling. the structures like, its a cool building. backed up against a mountain cliff, with one side crumbling down the hill. theres several floors they can see: the one they enter through, and a lower entrance knuckles had previously cleared from the rubble.

he leads them into a large enclosed room with rugged and crumbling tile floors. he proudly turns around and gestures to the room. he says in his previous explorations of this place, he just assumed there were the two floors. but using some quickmaths and excellent spatial awareness, he realized the ceiling of the floor below is much lower than expected with this style of construction. he has reason to believe that beneath this floor is a secret passage. to what, he's not sure, but it seems like a big deal, based on some clues he has. but he can't just dig down on his own. no, he gestures at the rubble on the ground, this isn't broken floor, these are tiles that fell from the ceiling. a ceiling which once held a mosaic mural that he would really like to preserve and restore maybe. so they have to carefully move the tile off the floor, which would take too long if it was just him. so he has sonic and tails to help him. tails specifically has brought some survey equipment to help them figure out where to look for the passage.

takes maybe another day or half-day after that to clear away a once-hidden stairwell down between the two levels and into the mountain. they found it, and it turns out to be a Huge deal. i cant decide what; a second hidden emerald shrine, an archive, exceptionally well-preserved art and artifacts, a cloaking system that can be powered by chaos emeralds, idk. something big. something valuable. something very important. knuckles is like. so ecstatic he overflows into happy awed silence. walking around, delicately touching the structures of the room. this changes things for him. good job knuckles :)

but something happens. knuckles accidentally trips a trap maybe. in the excitement, he smashes a structural support and the place starts coming down around them. they have to scramble to escape--the primary way out might even be blocked and knuckles has to dig out a new exit. the dust and dirt of the cave-in his hard to breathe through and it and the noise almost separate the three. but they barely make it out, the weight of the mountain sinking into the ancient cavern and forever burying whatever hope it brought them.

sonic and tails sit taking a breather. bummer the secret room was destroyed; now theyre back where they started. but hey, knuckles saved them and that's what matters! thanks man--! but knuckles is gone. vanished. sonic and tails split up to look for him--did he take off?? luckily sonic finds his footprints pretty quickly, follows a short path that's just been cut through the overgrowth, find knuckles sitting still holding the machete--

he didn't see him shaking and inches from tears as he stomped off before, as every failure came back to him every failure that was HIS it was ALWAYS him messing things up, his mind too full and too empty, emotions without thoughts, holding the metal against the side of his throat so all he had to do was pull his hand down--

sonic kicks that shit right out of knuckles' hand. fast and hard enough that if it was anyone else, he mightve broken their fingers. the blade clatters off a tree a rock a weird angle on the ground, and settles. sonics an adrenaline junky but this adrenaline feels tainted. his heartbeat feels way too fast and his hands are shaky. he thinks of gawain. he yells at his friend what the HELL man?!

and the dam breaks and knuckles is LOUD yelling about fucking up his huge important thing AGAIN, what kind of guardian IS he? a terrible one that can't do a SINGLE part of his ONE JOB correctly! this is all he lives for! he can't keep doing this this was the final straw so DON'T stop him!

and sonic is scared. for several reasons. but the one that ends up being the most pressing is that tails will hear and fly over here soon and he can't see any of this. so he shakily tries to talk knux down. everyone makes mistakes, nobody got hurt, why don't they just calm down and get back to camp for now. and he puts a hand on his shoulder and mentally scrambles for anything to stall with while knuckles quiets and sniffs and bundles it all back up. you good man? yeah, I'm good.

and tails reaches them and sonic says knux just took a walk to blow off some steam and we can all head back to camp now. knuckles bounces back before long, back to joking back to play-wrestling with tails, back to bossing the other two around about how to pack everything up. when sonic and tails leave the next day, he sheepishly apologizes to sonic for freaking out and promises he's fine now. sonic believes him because, well, hes not really emotionally equipped to believe otherwise. he's always there for his friends but he kind of needs them to be at a threshhold of okay or else he won't be okay. and he has to be okay.

so they leave. and sonic maybe makes some extra effort to call his friend more often, encourages amy and rouge to check in on him and make plans with him some more. but there's no resolution to what knuckles said to him in the forest. he doesn't tell anyone; he isn't sure who he could. he just tries not to think about gawain and makes himself believe knuckles will be alright.

they never picked up that machete, just left it lying there in the dirt.

[callmearcturus]

Out of curiosity, what would the premise of your dream Persona game be?

Well, let's see. What were the strong points of each game?

Persona 3 Portable: Girl Route. Team members have important relationships with each other instead of just orbiting the MC. Extremely strong theme. Structured in such a way that the player doesn't control what day they have a mandatory dungeon/plot event, making for better pacing. Best final boss. Best music. Greatest of the Best Friend guys. My favorite UX by far.

Persona 4 Golden: Best cast. Most interesting mystery. Was extremely queer, especially for the time. Most naturalistic writing. Best villain (not final boss). Easily the most polished script. Combat had the best balance of things to do and friction without being overcomplicated or simplistic.

Persona 5 Royal: Most interesting, sprawling location. Social link bonuses that matter. Jawdroppingly good bonus campaign. Best exploration. Only MC that fully feels like his own person. And I'll admit it, it has the best social links for NPCs.

So, the best Persona game would have:

A protagonist with as much personality as Joker but not gender locked. For the love of god just make a gender neutral protag.

Set it in another city that's based on a real place since it feels like real life designs better locations than Atlus does off the dome.

Honestly at this point I would love to see Persona do a game that doesn't take place in high school. I wanna see some young adults getting up to shit. If you absolutely need the school structure, then have it set in university/college. But the need for structure for the calendar can come from anything.

When everyone is cishet, the cast suffers. P5R proved it. (Okay, it's also because P5R literally has more teammates so no one gets properly developed but the cishetness does not help.) Lets get some queerness back in the cast, it does absolute wonders.

Morgana should be in it again. I don't know why or how, but I do know that carrying a cat around everywhere made Persona 5 was part of why I finished that fucking game.

I personally like the structure of having a central mystery with uncertain mechanics to solve, I think that's really engaging and helps with the episodic nature of Persona. However, once the mystery is solved, DO NOT ADD IN ANOTHER MASTERMIND CHARACTER WHO IS "REALLY" BEHIND IT ALL. JUST FUCKING STOP! GOD I HATE IT. Stop having a really cool set up and then deciding in the last 5 hours that a Mean God Did It All, I'm so DONE with that shit. Fuck Izanami and Fuck Yarblegarble.

While we're at it, if one more Persona game turns out to be a parable on how them kids are on their phones too much, I'm done.

Regarding music, either: A: Create multiple main battle themes so if they Fucking Suck again like in P4 it doesn't make your players want to scream by hour 30. B: Just use "Wiping All Out" again for the main battle theme. We're never going to surpass it, why not accept that.

LET THE PLAYER START A ROMANCE SEPARATE FROM SLINK RANKS. If I hit level 10 on someone and decide later I wanna date them, I should be able to do that. That way I can actually meet everyone, THEN decide who I wanna kiss.

Just gimme back Igor using shiny key of solomon shit to combine personae, fuck P5's edgelord bullshit. Also Margaret bc she was funny and also really hot and flirty.

Bring Maruki back just for funsies.

there we go, the perfect persona game

[jemmo]

top 5 friendships/friend groups in bls? 👀✨

i love this question!!!!! friendships are one of my favourite parts of bl and i need more of it in 2024

kimi ni wa todokanai/i cannot reach you - i adore the entirety of this friendship group and it’s such a testament to the show bc they hardly get fleshed out, but from that first shot of them all watching yamato get confessed to i knew i’d adore them. it’s the way they don’t really understand yamato and still hang out with him anyway, the way fujino is the pet straight that just won’t shut up about his girlfriend but tries to be so good to kakeru even when it messes everything up, whatever hosaka and amamiya have going on, and more than anything hosaka going after yamato and his persistence to be his friend and talk about things with him and give him advice and the way that he identifies the queerness in him. they’re just all so good at being in a group together, it’s so boyish and youthful, it makes you yearn for school days like that.

my school president - of course this has to be on here, they set the bar so high for friendship groups in bl, and it says a lot that in a bl with so many couples, they constantly go out of their way to stress the how special and important their friendships are, like yes platonic love is just as worthy of love songs as romantic love, and beyond the core group, people like tiwson and kajorn are still so important to the story. i’ll say it again, it’s so boyish and youthful and it also gives you that feeling of validation to see people that are kind of outsiders and not that popular band together and form such a strong, loyal bond, like these boys would die for each other and again, it makes me yearn for school days like that.

minato shouji coin laundry (it counts bc of season 2) - specifically shin and asuka bc whenever they have a scene together im just having the best time. shin is so grumpy and asuka is so desperate to get under his skin bc despite the bickering exterior they are so besties and have this added layer of being the only other person to understand their position in their relationships. again it’s queers finding queers so even if it doesn’t make sense on the surface, there’s that shared experience that helps them bond and understand each other and it’s so good

the eighth sense - anytime i think of joonpyo i can’t help but smile bc he’s such a legend, and so well written, bc even tho we don’t see it, we get such a good idea of what his life is like and it’s actually separate from jihyun, like it really feels like these two have been besties for years but are taking this chance to explore their own lives without feeling the need to include the other, but still knowing they’re the person they can go home and talk to about it all. it’s knowing that person will always be there, and you can both be honest and real with them and also just act like total fools together.

only friends - and no this is not msp, im not putting this on here for the whole group bc this is not a good friendship group, this is here for sand and nick only bc they’re literally the only solid friendship in the whole show where they’re actually looking out for each other, and they fact they made out and were able to laugh and cuddle afterwards says it all. they are the pathetic second choice club that uniquely understand each other bc they’re the only other person that knows what it’s like to love someone that’s as much of a mess as ray and boston are.

ASK ME MY TOP 5 OF ANYTHING BL 2023

[caatws]

Yondu's death and how it was handled in the following gotg projects is the main reason I think how Gamora's been treated is unforgivable. A funeral and two other follow ups to your death/to honor your importance vs "you're not dead, you just can't remember". It would take 2 minutes tops to have Mantis, Drax and Rocket say 2 sentences to eachother about missing Gamora. They don't even had to shed tears if that would be too much. Drax already hated Thanos for killing his family once before. Where was his anger.

vol 3 reduced Gamora from a fully realized character who was an equal partner in the story and interacted with the others and guided them, to mainly someone only Peter really knew. Carrying over her relationship with Nebula from Endgame is the only saving grace. Worse is that Peter talking about it is the only time the canon gives Gamora credit for being essential to the family's origins and by extension the franchise.

Also it makes me really sad that Zoe has probably given the best performance of the bunch throughout her entire mcu run and because Gamora's arc is such a mess it completely overshadows that by the time you get finished vol 3. In fact, imo, vol 3 was fire performance wise for but hits rock bottom plot and arc wise. Without her death or if they had ressurected her, I think she easily would have had one of the best arcs in the mcu.

yeah, when i was comparing the treatment gamora's death to nat's that was already Oof but now comparing with yondu is just...OOOOOFFFFFF. it's just sad seeing the characters not get a chance to rly express their grief for her ever :'( and i think only rly exploring peter's grief makes it seem like gamora rly just existed to be his gf, which i know is a whole nother can of worms of discourse happening in starmora land rn (and given all the circumstances in the film, i honestly think the way starmora as a relationship was handled was pretty solid)

tho we had the holiday special (and i did enjoy it!), i kinda wish we'd had some other gotg project (love & thunder doesn't count since they were just there for 2 secs to support thor LOL) between endgame and vol 3 to actually explore the fallout from iw/endgame a lot more, not just for the gamora situation, but, like, everyone else too. like i mentioned earlier, i think there's a gaping hole in rocket's arc (and nebula's but to a lesser extent) given where his arc left off in vol 2, then the 4 years that passed offscreen between that and iw, and then the 5 years that passed offscreen during endgame, and then ANOTHER 2 years passed offscreen between endgame and the holiday special/vol 3 (i think). i'd imagine losing all of the gotg would've affected rocket a LOT (like remember when he literally shot gamora so she wouldn't risk her life to save peter like lol) and then when they returned, surely that would shift the way he approached his relationships with them

similarly with nebula, i'm assuming she only stuck around with the gotg bc after endgame bc she'd become rocket's bestie for the restie (which i love) and also idk helped the avengers defeat thanos (? idk it also seems like the gotg were just kinda absorbed into the avengers for those 5 years and then became separate again after endgame, which would've been cool to establish more explicitly in canon) but given how uninterested she was in hanging around the gotg at both the end of vol 1 and vol 2, i think we needed to see more of how she went from that to practically being a de facto leader of sorts for the team in the beginning of vol 3

like i said before, i do think much of vol 3 was still very much firing on all cylinders, including the performances, but some of these holes in the arcs were still hard to look past. i know gunn said he wanted the film to be something you could watch on its own without all the context of the previous gotg films/iw/endgame (which makes me wonder how much that informed the way he approached things like the gamora situation) but i think including more story elements and references to past works that would've made vol 3 more dependent on the previous gotg appearances would've fixed quite a few of these problems

[scaryarcade]

i'm curious at what point you think smth ceases to be cognitive dissonance and becomes a system? i have severe trauma which resulted in a sort of split within me between my 'true' self and a 'defensive' self which is cold/unemotional/obsessive/productive. i have done some IFS work and found it very helpful and as a teenager i did identify this second self as a separate person who i converse with (and still do). i often have to recognize that i'm in that second self/state and forcibly drag myself out of it in order to be present emotionally or address certain things. at the same time, i don't experience time loss and i don't often converse with the self, it feels a lot more like a defense mechanism. i'm unsure if continuing my childhood habit of identifying and speaking to it as a separate person is more harmful or helpful, like if it is further disassociating me. i have had conversations with it and he has alluded to a third self which is deeply deeply violent towards me that he is trying to protect me from, but again i'm not sure how much of this is just IFS separation of parts as opposed to a true system. i'm mostly interested in where you think the line is between fractured selves with trauma as opposed to a system

so like, imo, the line between system and not-a-system is wherever you decide to draw it, and that's probably the most important takeaway here but also might not be the kind of answer you're looking for, lol. So the answers i will give include like. medical language, and my understanding of how clinicians differentiate this kind of stuff, which is a) something i spend a lot of time reading about but am not an expert on, b) not at all meant to define what i think a 'real system' is or isn't and c) something you can totally discard if it's not helpful to you personally.

fwiw, i'm pretty sure 'fractured selves with trauma' is exactly what plenty of MH professionals would describe as a system

i can't diagnose you with anything nor would i want to but your description of the 'defensive' self protecting you from another self (that you are not in contact with, but that the defensive self is) sounds To Me like there are dissociative barriers involved here that are stronger/more complicated than what's typically seen between parts in an IFS framework.

re: worrying about worsening dissociation, i don't think categorizing this other self as a separate person would cause further dissociation on its own. i think if you are welcoming, curious, accepting of and work to communicate with the other self you're describing you might even find dissociative symptoms Improving. on the flip side: if you identify this self as a separate person and then use that to reject and disavow it, that probably Will worsen dissociation!

^ i've talked about this in more detail in a post here

i do think there are probably some safeguards you could put in place if you're worried about worsening dissociation as you explore this. i'll put my thoughts on that under the cut bc this is getting long

it sounds like you are looking for an objective standard you can use to categorize what you're experiencing, and i don't think i can provide one for you, but i can tell you some stuff about how i draw the line for myself, personally. i'll put that under the cut as well:

so like. this gets kind of complicated to explain because i exist as a member of a larger system with very differentiated alters. however for ME as an alter specifically: my subsystem functions kind of similarly to what you describe. we don't experience time loss, we present as different versions of the same person that each exhibit different defense mechanisms in response to being triggered.

the reason we decided to call ourselves separate facets and differentiate from each other--even though we basically identify as the same person--is when i'm in one self-state, i feel like the emotions and behaviors of the other self-states don't belong to me. me (🐛) and another facet (🎶) share the same name and identity on the surface, but he tunes out stressors with fun distractions and blind optimism, and i don't. i wouldn't do that. when i remember times he was fronting i think 'that's not something i would do'. his behavior is outside my understanding of myself. so we call ourselves separate from each other.

basically for us it's a matter of "wow, i was feeling really triggered/stressed/unusual when i did that" vs. "i don't understand why i did that, i don't feel like i would do that, i can't imagine why i was thinking/feeling that way when that happened". it's not always clear-cut but you might find these things helpful to consider, idk.

FINALLY if you want to explore seeing this other self as a separate person/a member of a system but are worried about worsening dissociation--these are TOTALLY optional and it's completely up to you what you decide to do, but here are some (open-ended) questions you might want to ask yourself:

how do i feel about the aspects of my inner experience that i'm exploring? scared? guilty? hopeful? curious? many or none of those things?

am i usually able to identify when i'm dissociating? do i have coping methods i can use to ground myself?

do i feel safe? if i start feeling unsafe, are there ways i can return to feeling safe in my mind and body?

i hope literally any of this was helpful and/or made sense! i wish u the best as u explore this stuff and at the end of the day it's Completely up to you how you want to identify your experiences.

[lapseinart]

Supernatural: Distance and Mobility

Had to read an excerpt from Jennifer Morton’s “Moving Up Without Losing Your Way: The Ethical Costs of Upward Mobility” and like damn I couldn’t help but think of Sam and Dean?

Like obviously Sam goes to college, and we never discuss it in part I think because Sam sees that part of his life with rose tinted glasses but I bet it was hard. Elite institutions are a whole nother fucking culture man. Like I don’t think any fics I’ve read talk about him feeling super uncomfortable at college though it’s not an uncommon sentiment. I wonder if he found his father and Dean’s advice about acting confident and like you belong in order to lie for hunts helpful in getting used to the college environment. I wonder if he realized he was using that advice.

Like I’m a huge fan of Stanford Era Dean angst but I will get to that in a sec I wanna talk about Bad Boys so imma add a read more so I don’t take over too much space bc this is gonna get long

The episode Bad Boys obviously showed Dean’s division between his family and a normal life, a life with friends, and a girlfriend, where he gets good grades because he can apply himself and doesn’t have to steal food. And this is valuable! This is a good thing! This is a better quality of life! He’s SAFE! And he gives it up! Because family so important to him, Sammy is so important to him. It’s a good he values more than a better life! And obviously after this he doubles down. Can’t think of a life outside hunting because if he does he might regret leaving Sonny’s and he can’t. He can’t regret leaving Sonny’s. So he values the lives of others above his own, sacrifices his life for Sam’s because all of this has to make it worth it.

Literally Supernatural was metaphorically talking about the ethical costs of upward mobility before Morton

And that’s why he feels betrayed by Sam leaving. Because he’d thought about it, but he had valued Sam more than a better life and now Dean values Sam more than his life, but Sam didn’t return it. Sam walked away. And Sam cut Dean out of his life, because he wants to move up in the world, and if Sam sees Dean he might doubt, might go back, so he has to remove himself from his brother’s life. Which is something literally discussed in the chapter I read in Morton’s book. The feeling of having to separate one’s self from the community and the family in order to fully prioritize one’s education.

Dean said in the first episode that he hadn’t bothered Sam in 2 years. But like what does that mean? Did he visit? Did Sam think Dean was trying to guilt trip him by showing up injured? Did he notice how much it bothered Sam that he was injured when he visited? Did Dean try to stall/delay visiting Sam until he could show up without injuries? Did Sam get frustrated as it looked like his brother didn’t want to see him? Did he get frustrated with himself because of this? Did they just keep rescheduling until eventually they gave up?

Then again Sam immediately diving into college gets a new dimension if they had this back and forth. Does Dean feel envious? Does Sam feel relieved when his brother stalls and delays his visits? Does Sam feel guilty sometimes for being relieved?

Obviously I love lonely Stanford Era Dean but this is also an interesting dynamic to explore. Like in 2005 we weren’t talking about how class differences affected college retention; people weren’t really talking college retention much at all I don’t think, it was more about just getting people there. I could probably talk more about Sam and Dean and college and education but imma stop here bc that’s a post for another day

[salemoleander]

VERY interested in creator commentary for the 3rd life webweave (seriously one of the coolest things ive seen made in this fandom, its gorgeously edited AND very funny AND the quotes themselves are all knock-your-socks off material. That Rosencrantz And Guildenstern Line Holy Shit)

Okay so first off THANK YOU that's super kind! It's nerve-wracking posting graphic design that is reconstituted from other sources, bc I've seen it perceived as a 'lazy' or unskilled format, so this is really really encouraging to hear.

I am not a concise person, which is why this has taken so long! I realized as I was initially responding that I was trying to dive into three separate topics:

The actual process I follow, my tips + tricks on making web weaves

Analysis of my 3rd Life web weave

My philosophy towards web weaves and collage as an art form

Only one of those is the question you actually asked, so #2 is what I'll be talking about in this post! However, I am working on a video overview of the other topics, because I think they're worth exploring - I will obviously post that on this blog once it's done.

To avoid jumpscaring anyone with a wall of text, I've thrown my commentary under a readmore.

The one takeaway I'll mention before we dive in is if anyone has a character/narrative web weave request, please hit me up! I have so many I'm working on, having a next topic suggestion is super helpful to narrow things down.

General Creation Comments

I am At All Times collecting images, so it's only a matter of time until I make a webweave for a group/ concept/ person:

(My phone storage is Certainly being utilized. Also I will never be free of making these.)

It just so happened that my Third Life folder filled up fastest/ felt like it was in a good balance to work with, so that's what I started with!

I try to use a mix of text and images, and both serious and funny stuff. Even at its most serious the Life Series is also funny, and it's important to reflect that!

That said, if you compare the jokes I've picked in this piece vs the void falling web weave, you'll notice the jokes on this one trend sharper. The 'How to Detect Misery' and 'How to Tell if it's Over' memes (both from @thatsbelievable, who is a GREAT source of web weave content) are morbidly funny. Surviving horrific circumstances, preparing to suffer, unimaginable violence, eroticism and death, covered in blood - all of the jokes are violent.

As I go, I weed out posts that don't fit, or (mostly) prune text posts out. Too much text ruins the flow, and I LOVE words so I tend to have too much writing and not enough art.

3rd life had only a few things that didn't make the cut, bc I was fairly judicious as I added to that folder, but these were scrapped:

As I added the posts I knew I wanted and split them between panels, I naturally started seeing a 'flow' from early game biomes/bases and the more tender pairings, into violence + devotion, and then ending in.. something. I wasn't sure what I wanted the end to be yet.

I ran out of posts, and knew I needed Wayyy more images to offset the text, so I went looking through the Smithsonian's excellent collection of CC0-licensed art!

That's where I found the Perfect Image - that last picture of the red angel laid low. I knew immediately that it needed to be most of the final scene, with very little obscuring or distracting from it.

Okay, diving into specific panel analysis!

Panel One

It's the beginning, so everything is still fairly light - lots of brown and green tones.

The summary (imo) is that every faction in 3rd Life is in different stories!

Grian and Scar are playing cowboys, an old Western style narrative where they're beholden to each other, out to get the Bad Guys (even if objectively they're the ones being violent little instigators).

Flower Husbands are a greek fucking tragedy, Jimmy's sudden loss and Scott in mourning, trying to cause as much destruction as possible before the gods knock him down too.

Dogwarts are a middle English story of fealty and homosocial bonds and dying for honor.

And the Crastle is like. Shakespeare or Arthur Miller or Stoppard. They are in a theater, they are playing with all of the narratives. Too aware of the trajectory they're on, and entirely unable to stop it.

The images on the first page are the four primary pairings in 3rd Life - top left, in the background of the 'How to Detect Misery' meme, is the desert. The sudden punchline of that meme felt like a good starting point - a creeper-blast of a joke.

The pair to the right represent Scott and Jimmy. I liked the Impressionist and classic myth-inspired stylization. Also, the toga blended near-seamlessly into the desert hill so it looked almost like a wing, implying a tie to angels as well as foreshadowing Jimmy's death AND Scott's partnership with Grian/Scar.

Up in the top right-hand corner is a little Crastle, and the pair embracing on the right side of the page are Bdubs and Cleo. The red hair fit, but it was the old-fashioned clothing and sense of finality that I really liked.

On the left is Dogwarts - Ren and Martyn. I wanted an image that had a very different style, as they were opposed to desert duo + everyone else. I felt the sketchy ink stood out and elicited ideas of worn vellum paper. It felt like a sketch you'd discover sitting in a chest of a long-worn-down enchanting room.

There's a forest and a mostly-occluded castle in the background art on page one, also meant to represent Dogwarts. That forest bleeds into the next page, where the violence really begins.

Panel Two

We've started with a forest, but it's darker than the last one, and wilder.

Bursts of red stand out violently on the page.

'Fallen Angel' is a classic for emotionally fraught blorboposting! There are many, Many Mountain Goats songs that fit, but the way a-doctor-not-a-fangirl paired this line with this painting was striking to me. In particular, I like how 'getting revenge' was something that drove most of 3rd Life, even though Red Lives (come unhinged) were meant to be the driving force of violence. They weren't supposed to have bonds, they weren't supposed to have allies! But it's the bonds that drove the violence.

The 'I heart eroticism and death' cut-out plopped onto the collage was intended to feel like a kind of cheesy tourist stamp - 'I killed my friends in horrible death games and all I got was this lousy t-shirt' vibes.

The 'First off' comment feels like the illogical thought proces all of the doomed players (so, all of the players) were following - "if I just do well enough at murder, this will all be over."

The 'moments of grace' image is probably my most indulgent addition. I wanted a softer, quiet nod to the good parts, to the fun and the joy in between the violence. In particular, the dawn breaking on waves reminded me of the short span Grian and Scar spent tensely placing TNT under sand in the desert. I imagine silent cooperation and the sussuration of sand on sand, and quiet for just a few minutes.

'It's better to know how to let others unmask you and to endure the rule of the game' means: if you are too good, if you survive long enough, you will end up alone. This is about Bdubs and Cleo - kings of roleplay, of being a little overeager and dying for it and getting a mercifully quick ending. It is also about the cactus ring.

Panel Three

The centerpiece of this page is 'G-d's Idea', the beautiful abstract painting of a blood-soaked angel. It makes me insane every time I see it. Grim reaper in mourning kinda guy

I wanted to do something to tie more directly to the end, but didn't want to pull a disembodied-face-in-90s-grad-photo approach to add Scar. So I found a drawing that looked like the Monopoly Mountain build, and carefully added it onto one wing. I really really like this as an addition, it is probably my favorite combination in this post.

The Anne Carson quote is obvs in Minecraft font - I also split up the lines, so that the left and right side loosely create their own sentences/ideas. "There is a theory that watching other people is good for you" and "Unbearable stories may cleanse you of your darkness." I wish I had been more careful with the contrast on 'yourself all', but oh well, we can just call it being difficult to read an experiential facet of the poem.

"Do you want to go down to the pits of yourself all alone?" is a good fucking line, and manages to mirror both the commentary on us the viewers AND the experience of the creators AND the experience of the characters. We get to experience violence vicariously, the creators get to experience it with friends + in safety, and the characters (or character, I should say, just Grian left by the time you're reading this) are experiencing that low point totally alone.

Aside from the obvious fit, the Rosencrantz + Guildenstern lines stand in as a conversation between the viewers and the characters. The appraising description of kiling and dying beautifully makes way for a mournful interruption that no, fuck that, this isn't a game for us (with some obvious irony there).

Finally, I needed it to end funny; the whole thing is already more serious than it probably should've been. I like this joke because it's short, and it implies the aftermath in a comedic way. Picturing everyone spawning back into Hermitcraft, covered in blood, upset, but mostly with a profoundly awkward sense of 'well I fucked that one up. That got a bit more homoerotic than intended, and now every other shopping trip I have to make awkward eye contact with the person I mcMurdered."

Again, thank you so much for your ask and kind words! I'm looking forward to making a general guide video on web weaves one of these days :D

[fencesandfrogs]

Hi 👋 as a singlet thinking about writing DID and systems and moon knight, have you watched sense8? I know it is not a story about DID but I couldn’t help but notice similarities. Could you give us an opinion on that fictional portrayal of multiple people sharing a body?

hm well ok one. love sense8. sense8 au has been fav tag on ao3 since they invented fav tags. have. there's a check please sense8 au i reread a lot.

it is a very good show. not surprised by why i love it now. used to latch onto anything like that. grew up very lonely. daemons, sense8 clusters, anything like that. favourite fantasies.

two. while i like sense8, it's not really anything like osddid. there r many reasons. no trauma. multiple bodies. not from childhood. etc.

these things r important.

oh n the eye contact thingy. that's. urgh. i don't want to go further bc it is. well. if u know u know and if u don't know i apologize but i will not tell u.

three. i think sense8 is a very good show. i think it explores an interesting idea. there r elements that feel very.

ok u know how. they share space? and it's cool and fuzzy n stuff?

that's how i feel abt my system a lot. i don't like. literally see them where they're not. but a lot of time. i like to see them filling space with me. s'kinda like. a game? oh ur sitting on that chair. not a hallucination or anything i just. like doing it. have lots of practice as a kid xd.

problem is that the show is nothing like did because there's weird interactions stuff that doesn't happen when ur just like. thinking oh that guy would b there etc.

so like.

idk i relate to parts of sense8. sharing ur life hard. sharing ur life fun.

but it's not very much like osddid. there's a lot.

okay i didn't understand this line at first. but u see a lot of people say "osddid is not just alters disorder." and i didn't really understand that at first. for many reasons.

but if i can try to break it down.

the guys in my head and i are one person that just never integrated. s'like. i'm not a full person. that's okay. i'm one part of a full person. n if u add us all together i'd like to think we're more than a full person. at least one and a quarter people. there's some complicated unpicking to do here: we're different people. me n mari n current host r not the same person at all at all at all. but we're not separate either.

but the. the things. urgh.

there's memory loss and terrible dissociation n arguing with urself n. y'know. i was hurt as a child in a way that was incomprehensible to me.

(people with osddid sometimes say that but like. "to you." i don't like that phrasing. my trauma is very comprehensible to others. but it wasn't to me, as a child. n that's what matters.)

i like sense8 a lot. i am now maybe going to bug my guys about imagining us as a sense8 cluster. i think that would be a fun bonding activity.

but other than a few things, it's nothing like did so it's hard to compare.

<3

[themountainsays]

This is kind if a weird niche thing but Encanto Dragon Age AU.

I think the valley would be somewhere near Antiva (probably close to the mountains that separate Antiva from Tevinter at the southern tip of the Arlathan Forest), and Alma would be running away from Tevinter slavers. (Bc unfortunately Tevinter can be awful.) She is a late blooming mage and might have never manifested much magic at all IF her husband had survived the flight but he didn’t, as it is her emotional turmoil generated a wave of magic that took out the people after them and they were able to properly get away. Up to you if they are elves or just humans, it will change how they interact with “outsiders” bc elves have been through a lot.

For Mirabel’s familial isolation thing to work in this case, since she still has magic, I think she would have to be not great at it still but is a Dreamer, along with Bruno and maybe baby Antonio. (Basically all people except dwarves dream in a realm called the Fade, which houses spirits/demons and is where magic comes from. Mages control the Fade in the waking world and can more easily control/remember dreams, Dreamers are exceptionally good at controlling the Fade while asleep and often interact with spirits more than the average mage.)

They both talk to spirits, which can be helpful but can also be dangerous and is frowned upon. They let Bruno slide until he mentions he’s friends with a Hope spirit, and then they get upset with him because he got too close. (Docile spirits like Hope, Valor, Wisdom, etc. can turn into demons like Despair, Envy, or Pride if they’re distressed or if the expectations of mortals are forced on them, basically you gotta just let the spirits vibe.)

So he left the family because he felt like they weren’t seeing him but just dangerous powers, like in the movie, but he still guards their dreams in the Fade which Dolores senses on occasion. In this AU he would have to actually move out and maybe he makes a shack in the woods or something, his presence is less physical but not less important if you get me.

When Mirabel starts making friends with spirits and maybe even meets Hope at some point, Alma cracks down which frustrates Mirabel seeing as the one thing she CAN do well is not allowed. Perhaps she gets bullied by a Despair or Desire demon for a little bit but Bruno chases them off and that’s how they meet. And she leaves to find him because she has so many questions and its not like her family wants her to flourish anyway.

Instead of a literal loss of the magic the conflict is probably a building of emotions that happens after Mirabel leaves to go see Bruno, which can screw with mages and their powers. If you still want Casita itself to crumble, perhaps it was half repaired with magic whenever something broke down but due to emotional distress the enchantments on it fail. The soul of Casita could be spirits hanging around that need to distance themselves to stay safe when the family gets too wound up. Hope is the one to see and tell Bruno about it because they need help, and they go to reassure the family that Mirabel is fine, which gets both of them accepted back.

So basically the story gets a bit more complex and it changes from only being about treating people correctly, after the “movie events” it adds the progress of this isolated community learning to coexist with the spirits around them. And its really good when Bruno comes back because he needs to teach Antonio how to respect good spirits and identify dangerous ones.

(I mostly just wanna see BruMira being nerds and bonding over their Fade studies with Hope okay.)

Sorry for the long post, I love crossovers too much and got excited for the way this AU could explore mages and spirits beyond the “Never talk to spirits, mages can’t govern themselves, its too dangerous!” thing the dominant cultures in the main DA series do.

Ahhh okay okay I know NOTHING about Dragon Age but I thinkkkkkkkkk I get what you mean, yeah, it has some legend of korra vibes right? AHh Bruno and Mirabel sharing a specific power and him needing to teach her 👀👀👀👀👀

[please-picturemeintheweeds]

Like the whole hating Barbie thing feels really similar to something we (mutuals) talk about a lot here with Taylor and how people conflate liking her with their own personal politics and their self-identity, which leads them to be really upset when Taylor doesn’t live up to those politics. But enjoying a movie or liking Taylor swift doesn’t make you a bad leftist, it’s okay! And using media/celebrities as a way to discuss and to figure out our own political beliefs is important and healthy, but we’ve got to be able to separate our actual beliefs from the message expressed in whatever media. Taylor and Mattel both love capitalism, I do not! I liked the Barbie movie and it made me think about some stuff in new and clever and interesting ways, which will absolutely inform how I talk about feminism with people in my life, including men who maybe were unreceptive to feminism but felt welcomed into it by the Barbie movie by exploring a lot of questions men have about it, all while giving them some Awesome Dance Sequences and fashion. If I were a little boy, I would have been STOKED by that movie, and that’s really important. I was surprised by how much the movie made me think about plastic. The ASL interpretation was literally iconic, what a brilliant way to include the interpreter as another character in Barbie land, with some shots clearly structured with this in mind. We can’t just help misogynists paint the movie as trash just bc it doesn’t reflect 100% our beliefs. It was super important, and influential and will be many many many many many peoples first real introduction to feminism. And come on it was so fun!!!! Maybe now I have this out of my system and can resume hyperfixating on Taylor….