#and the sound quality would be much better in the actual venue and you’d hear all the bands you don’t like playing from an apartment)

[mx-misty-eyed]

remembering the time i was complaining about concert tickets being expensive and my former friend casually just said you could just rent an apartment near a venue for $500 a month so you wouldn’t have to pay for tickets

like. average rent in the us is over 1k (not to mention apartments in a big city where all the concert venues are would probably be more). and that’s not even considering, yknow, leases and security deposits and whatnot. your father is a millionaire landlord and you claim to be a socialist (despite saying that all people should work to, yknow, live while defending ur dad evicting an unemployed drug addict). why do you think that you can just casually rent an apartment for $500 so you don’t have to pay for concert tickets.

[cheri-translates]

[CN] Shaw’s S2 R&S - Glacier Navigation

🍒 Warning: This post contains detailed spoilers for a Rumours & Secrets, 冰川行舟, which has not been released in EN! 🍒

This R&S features S2 Shaw

In terms of sequencing, this is Shaw’s first S2 R&S!

[ Chapter One ]

On this rare break, a phone call from Shaw brings me to the entrance of Loveland University.

At the school gate, a huge “Welcome New Students" banner waves in the wind. The osmanthus petals at my feet exude the unique scent of late summer and early autumn.

I follow Shaw through the bustling crowd and towards the graduate student registration point.

MC: The registration office... this should be it.

Shaw: Are you sure it's here? Just look at these registering students - how do they look like graduate students?

MC: You’re clearly the one who doesn’t look like a graduate student, okay?

Shaw glances at the long line outside the door of the office. Clicking his tongue, he eventually stands at the back properly.

Not having to wait for long, the both of us reach the head of the line.

MC: You don't need me to accompany you for the registration, do you?

Shaw: What are you thinking? Are you treating me like a kid?

MC: Then why did you drag me along to school...

Shaw: I just took you out for a breather after seeing you squatting at home for a few weeks.

He waves his hand at me in self-assurance, turning his head and entering the office.

I lean against the wall, waiting for him. As soon as I take out my phone, the tall figure walks out of the office fiercely.

MC: ...how did you settle it so quickly?

Shaw doesn’t respond. He suddenly leans forward, his eyes almost within reach. His half-squinting eyes contain slight irritation.

MC: W-what do you want... Ah! Don't touch my hair!

I raise my hand to protect my hair, but my cheek ends up getting pinched twice by two of his fingers.

Shaw: This is your punishment for leading me to the wrong place.

MC: No way, we really went to the wrong place?

Shaw: This is the registration point for the Chinese Department. The Archaeology Department is in Zhi Hua Building.

MC: Zhi Hua Building... I remember now. I think we passed by it earlier.

Shaw: Really?

Knowing that I was in the wrong, I quickly lift both my hands up as a guarantee.

MC: Really, I definitely won’t be wrong this time!

Shaw: Fine, I’ll reluctantly believe you this time. The last time.

-

[ Chapter Two ]

Since heading to the wrong place led to quite a delay, the door to the registration office of the Department of Archaeology is completely empty.

Shaw knocks on the office door. Inside, there’s only one middle-aged teacher who is currently reading the newspaper.

Teacher: A freshman? Come, fill in this form. Did you bring a copy of your ID card? If you didn’t bring it, give me the original. I'll make a copy for you.

Shaw: I brought it.

Teacher: What about the one-inch photo?

Shaw: Here.

Teacher: Oh, the boy's ID photo is so handsome! Sit for a while, I have to make a record.

Shaw: Mm, thanks for the hard work, teacher.

The teacher sits in front of the computer leisurely, then casts a curious glance at the door.

Teacher: Is that young lady outside your girlfriend?

Shaw: No.

Shaw pauses, then adds on.

Shaw: Just a friend.

Teacher: Oh... I understand~

The middle-aged man reveals a meaningful smile, and can’t help but gesture at the young man in front of him

Teacher: Young people have to be braver. How can a boy be so shy!

Shaw suppresses the urge to roll his eyes, squeezing out words one by one from between his teeth.

Shaw: Teacher, are you done with the registration?

[Note] There are different ways of saying “you” in Chinese, depending on formality! When being polite and respectful, especially to an elder, 您 (“nin”) is used. When talking to friends or someone younger, 你 (“ni”) is used. SHAW USES 您 HERE BECAUSE HE IS A POLITE BOY

Teacher: Yes yes, sign here. There’s one more thing I have to tell you. Because you filled in your identity as an Evolver on the form, I’ll have to trouble you to submit a copy of the Evol inspection report.

Shaw: The notice didn’t mention that I had to bring it.

Teacher: It’s a new requirement. It conveniences the school in terms of management, so I hope you can understand. Last semester, an Evolver lost control of his ability and almost lifted the entire classroom. The STF were called down for a day, and it was very troublesome. 

When he hears the term “STF”, Shaw’s expression stirs slightly. Then, he clicks his tongue impatiently.

Shaw: So troublesome...

Teacher: What did you say?

Shaw: Nothing. Can I hand it in another day?

Teacher: It's fine, just come back within five working days. Here, your notice.

Shaw: Thanks.

-

[ Chapter Three ]

Schoolmate A: Schoolmate, want to check out our e-sports club? We organise competitions every month, and you can receive exquisite merchandise!

Schoolmate B: Schoolmate, come take a look at our basketball club! Handsome guys and beautiful girls gather and keep fit...

Today happens to be the club recruitment day. When Shaw and I pass by the public square, students constantly stop us, asking if we wish to join their clubs.

I look at Shaw curiously, but he doesn’t seem to be interested in any clubs. He walks quickly, not even giving them a glance.

When we’re about to leave the public square, we are once again stopped by a student.

Schoolmate C: Schoolmates, I can tell at a glance that you’re both from the Arts Department, right? Tsk tsk, your outfits have such an artistic quality. I’m from the rock club of our school. Even though the club was only established this year, I believe we have great potential! Usually, the club will organise activities introducing various instruments and music appreciation for hobbyists. Our club president even formed a band himself! They’re performing over there. Do you two want to have a listen?

I initially thought that Shaw would once again ignore him and leave. Unexpectedly, he suddenly stops in his footsteps, then arches his eyebrows with interest.

Shaw: Oh? You guys have a band?

Schoolmate C: Of course! We don't do covers. They’re all original songs!

Shaw: Let’s have a listen then.

MC: Do you actually want to join this rock club?

Shaw: We’ll talk after listening.

After saying this, he walks towards the area surrounded by a cluster of people.

The venue is simple, but there’s a sizeable number of audience members. The band members in the middle are wagging their heads while performing a song.

The vocals are discordant, and the sound quality is inferior. I’m unable to hear the lyrics clearly, but the melody is really catchy.

MC: I didn't expect them to look like an actual band... Shaw?

Shaw: ...tch.

Shaw grabs my arm, leaving the scene without saying a word.

MC: What’s wrong?

Shaw: Hearing plagiarised songs dirties my ears.

MC: That song from before was plagiarised?!

Shaw: They copied an unpopular old song from the 80s. No wonder these people didn’t realise it. You should also improve your musical literacy so you wouldn’t be confused by copied songs.

MC: So what you mean is... I should listen to your band’s songs more?

Shaw: Of course.

I burst out laughing, and Shaw raises his eyebrows in dissatisfaction.

Shaw: What are you laughing at?

MC: No, no, I just think that you’ve always been very serious about your band...

Shaw: You seem pretty concerned about my band?

MC: Mm. I know that you really like this band.

Shaw glances at me, as though verifying the sincerity of my words.

Then, he turns his gaze away, and sunlight touches the corners of his sharp and slightly raised mouth.

Shaw: Even if it’s just for fun, I’ll do even better than everyone else.

He says these words matter-of-factly, as though so long as he’s willing, every difficulty can be stamped out by him.

Shaw takes a final look back at the noisy public square. Retrieving a pair of earphones from his pocket, he hands it to me.

Shaw: Wear it properly. I’ll let you listen to truly good music.

-

[ Chapter Four ]

Shaw: Let’s go. Also, we’ll stop by the supermarket along the way. I’m buying some daily necessities.

MC: I really couldn’t tell that you’d be willing to stay in a dormitory.

Shaw: Who said so? I don’t plan to stay in a dormitory.

MC: Huh?

Shaw: I never stay with outsiders. 

Shaw: Anyway, there’s a small room in Live House, and I plan to live there. Rehearsals will be convenient too.

MC: Oh... but your place is really too empty. Aside from a bed, it doesn't look liveable.

Shaw: Hm? How’d you know that my place is empty?

MC: I...

I bite my tongue, hurriedly tossing out a reason to muddle through it.

MC: I don’t even have to think about it to know. Judging by your personality, your house definitely has nothing but bare walls.

Probably because of my self-assured tone, Shaw retracts his scrutinising gaze, pursing his lips. 

Shaw: That’s not how you use “nothing but bare walls”. Did you even pay attention in school... Let’s go.”

[Note] The reason why Shaw says this is because what MC used was 家徒四壁 (“jia tou si bi”), which is an idiom literally translating to “nothing but bare walls”. However, this idiom is supposed to describe someone who is very poor!

Shaw has always been very proactive. When he finishes speaking, he quickly takes me to the nearest supermarket from school.

After a short while, the shopping cart is stuffed to the brim.

Shaw: ...wait. I asked you to get a washbowl for me. Why’d you get me three? Do you need to use three washbasins to wash your face every day?

MC: These three washbasins have their respective uses! This one is for washing your face, this one is for washing your body, this one...”

Shaw: Washes what?

MC: Fruits!

Shaw: So troublesome. I might as well buy fruits that I can eat directly without washing.

MC: This is a refined life, okay? If you think it’s too much, then I'll reduce... Hey, what did you put into the cart?

Shaw: Daily necessities.

Lowering my head to take a look, I see three boxes of animal-shaped clothes hangers. The chubby little animals have their cheeks puffed out, lying in the washbowls I’m buying.

MC: Wow, so cute! You’re quite good at picking things too! ...but why are you buying three boxes?

Shaw: I learnt from you. One box for clipping towels, one box for clipping clothes, and one box...

MC: Huh?

Shaw doesn’t finish the second half of the sentence, and I subconsciously look up at him, meeting his sly eyes.

Shaw: Since you came out to run errands today, I’ll give it to you.

-

Shaw leans against the door of Live House, quietly watching the taxi drown in the neon glow. Suddenly, the phone in his pocket vibrates slightly.

An unknown number appears on the screen. Shaw frowns, then lifts his hand to tap the answer button.

?: I heard you reported to school today?

Shaw: Looks like you guys are really free. You even have to bother about my enrolment in school?

?: How is it? Is everything going smoothly?

Shaw: It’s fine. Some situations cropped up, but I’m still in a pretty good mood. Also, you guys have to help me with something. The school wants me to submit an Evol inspection report. Forge one for me.

?: No problem. You can collect it from the usual place. Is there anything unusual about Nox from BS recently?

Hearing this alias, Shaw subconsciously glances into the distance. However, all that is visible is the gorgeous night of the city.

Shaw: She's been very busy recently, and seems to keep working overtime. That's it.

?: You know that’s not what we’re asking about.

Shaw: ...what’s the rush? I haven't finished investigating what you guys want to know.

?: Let me remind you not to mix in unnecessary emotions. Don't forget your mission either.

Shaw: I know. I'm hanging up.

The streetlights lining the long street light up in succession, dyeing Shaw’s hair in a warm colour.

He looks at the phone for a long time, and an untamed smile surfaces on the corners of his lips.

Shaw: I have the final say on how to deal with her.

He takes the long skateboard he had set by the side, lifts his ankle slightly, and skates into the night without hesitation.

More from S2: here

[be11atrixthestrange]

Waking Up In Vegas Chapter 10

After a night of debauchery, Ron and Hermione wake up in Vegas... married.

Muggle!AU. Romcom!Romione. Slow burning, smutty, angst-fest.

Rated M for reasons.

Ao3 | FFN

------------------------------

More Chapters

------------------------------

TW: non-con, although nothing explicit

[Hermione]

Hermione leans on the bar table for support, one hand clutching her drink and the other rubbing at her temple. The room is spinning, and she's dizzy, nauseous, and unable to focus her eyes on anything.

With one blinding exception, of course. In her peripheral vision, she can see the security guard dragging Ron Weasley from the venue, his arms flailing as he stumbles alongside. Against all odds, his vibrant red hair always draws her attention, even when it's entirely inappropriate.

"Can you believe him?" growls Cormac, massaging his eye. "Bartender, ice."

The bartender abruptly stops wiping down the table to stare back at Cormac, her eyebrows raised in amusement. "Bartender?"

"Yeah. Ice."

Hermione takes a long swig through her straw and glances between Cormac and the bartender, who seem to be sizing each other up.

The bartender flashes her name card at Cormac and offers a smile that looks more fake than genuine. "Sure, you can have some ice," she says sweetly. "But for next time, my name is Rosmerta."

Rosmerta turns away from the bar, muttering something about rude tourists. Hermione makes a mental note to leave her a good tip at the end of the night.

Once Rosmerta's out of earshot, Cormac turns to Hermione. "Why is everyone being so rude to me today? First your ex-boyfriend, now that old broad?"

His comment, and more specifically, the way he says it feels slimy to Hermione, as if his 'woe is me' attitude is nothing more than an effort to rack up pity points.

"Aww, you're almost done with your drink," he says, right as Rosmerta returns with a pack of ice. He snatches the ice from her hands and demands, "Another for the lady."

Hermione's cheeks heat up in embarrassment. No 'thank you' for the ice, no 'please' for the drink — what does she see in this guy? Other than the fact that he's conveniently interested in her, and he's not Ron, of course. Hermione mouths an apology to Rosmerta when the bartender saunters off to refill Hermione's glass.

"Rosmerta has been lovely to us. She's not an old broad," says Hermione to Cormac, who's now pressing the packet of ice to his bruised eye. "And he's not my ex-boyfriend."

Cormac chuckles. "It sure looks like something happened between you and ginger. By the way you dumped ice water on him, you'd think he cheated on you or something."

Hermione stiffens at the reminder of Lavender's mischievous look as she buttoned her blouse in the hallway, followed by the nonchalant way Ron waltzed up to her just now, as if nothing had happened between them. She covers up her shaky hand with another drawn-out sip of her strong drink, forcing down the bitter taste with a grimace.

"I'm glad you never dated the ginger because you can do so much better. Like me, for instance." Cormac motions to himself, a smug smile on his face.

Suppressing the urge to roll her eyes, Hermione puts the straw back to her lips — she really should have asked Rosmerta to hold the straw, but thanks to Cormac, they were already the most demanding couple at the bar, and she didn't want to put any more stress on the poor woman.

She glances over to her companion. So far he's been quite rude — embarrassingly so — and has only talked about himself. He spotted her on the dance floor a short while before and seemed kind enough, so she'd agreed to get a drink with him. She hadn't let herself get a good look at him earlier, so her eyes trace over Cormac's body now, his biceps bulging from his too-tight polo, his chiseled jawline. Underneath the bruise, his eyes are nice. They're not impossibly blue, like tropical seas she can get lost in, but they're not bad.

He's actually quite good-looking, but he'd be even easier on the eyes if he didn't know it. Pompousness is not a trait Hermione looks for in a man.

But she's not looking for anything serious with Cormac, so maybe she can turn the other cheek to some of his more unpleasant qualities. A bit more alcohol might help. She's just here to have fun, after all. Cormac seems to be an appropriate option for that.

As if reading her mind, Cormac leans over to her and whispers, "What do you say? Want to get out of here?"

It's the memory of Lavender fastening her blouse, her smug 'Give him a chance to get dressed first' that gives her response all the permission needed to slip from her lips.

"I guess."

"I'll take that as a yes," says Cormac, rising to his feet and tugging at Hermione's arm.

She stumbles out of her chair, somewhat surprised by his constricting grip on her wrist. It almost cuts off her circulation and would feel unnecessary in any other circumstance.

But she also stood up too quickly and is momentarily flustered and dizzy, so maybe she has his support to thank for not falling down.

"Oh my god, I'm drunk, aren't I?"

Cormac scoffs, sliding his arm around her waist to support her. His hand lands a little too low on her hips for comfort. It doesn't feel anything like Ron's did — caring, gentle, and responsive to communication. Yet, she's hesitant to say anything and bring his attention to what lies beneath his fingers, just in case his hand placement isn't intentional. She might ruin something innocent. That, or he might read too much into her taking notice. She's unsure which is more likely.

"You seem perfectly in control to me," says Cormac.

His softly-spoken comment flushes out some of her self-consciousness — before, she feared that she looked sloppy, messy, unattractive. But it also irritates her, invalidating her difficulty standing and walking in a straight line without the support of his body up against hers. Plus, the fact that it's nearly a whisper, and she can barely hear him suggests that she's not the one he's trying to convince.

Maybe she's reading too much into everything, and it's just the alcohol talking.

They continue across the dance floor and out the doors, his thick hand steady on her hip. When they reach the stairs and the music quiets down, he picks up the conversation again.

"For real. What did that boy do? You said he lied to you?"

Right. Hermione glances at Cormac, who's smirking at her, and decides he doesn't need to know the details.

"Oh, that? It was nothing."

"Nothing gets a drink in the face?" laughs Cormac. "Well, lucky for me, I like them a little feisty."

His words immediately make Hermione uncomfortable. He likes them feisty? How many feisty notches are there on Cormac's bedpost? Is she sensing an attraction to a woman who fights back? Her head spins, and again, she has to remind herself that it's probably just the alcohol talking.

Still, something feels off.

When they make it to the top of the stairs, Hermione places some reluctant trust in her instincts and uses the flat ground as an opportunity to pull away from Cormac. In doing so, she accidentally slides her backside against his hand. As predicted, he interprets her movement incorrectly.

"I see what you're doing, Hermione," he growls. With a hum of appreciation, his fingers clench down through the fabric of her skirt and firmly grip her bum. He turns his body toward her and presses her back to the wall.

Hermione opens her mouth to speak up, but she doesn't know what to communicate. She's not sure if she wants him to stop or if she just wants assurance that he would if she told him to, but her racing mind has no clue how to phrase that request without ruining the possibility of a casual, consensual encounter.

He'd probably prefer the benefit of the doubt, as most men have come to expect it, but then there's the problem that he's nearly twice her height, his hands are as big as her face, and he likes them feisty, which might cause him to interpret dissent as a flirt or a challenge.

Hermione internally chastises herself for wasting time overthinking everything, again, because she instinctively knows that the longer she's quiet, the more her silence will sound like permission. It only takes a few seconds for her to run out of time to decide where she even falls on the spectrum between yes and no before his lips crash roughly into hers.

He presses his hips against her, and she can feel his erection digging into her leg. It's prepped and ready, and she's anything but.

He runs his tongue across her lips, and his grumble of pleasure reverberates into her throat. It takes effort, but she turns her head to the side. As she feared, he interprets this as an invitation to tug at the soft flesh of her neck with his teeth and slide his free hand up her dress until it cups her breast.

"Cormac—"

"Couldn't even wait until you got to my room, could you?" he muses, his lips dragging hungrily along her shoulder. "I could tell you wanted me, but damn."

A storm of anger boils up inside of her — his supposed confidence in feelings she herself has yet to identify is beyond invasive.

She can't get her hand between them for leverage. "Cormac, please—"

"You're welcome," he chuckles back, completely misinterpreting her meaning. Again.

His pinned hand tugs at the fabric of her dress, inching it up and over the curve of her bum and exposing her lacy knickers. "Ahh, you came prepared to fuck, didn't you?"

Another burst of anger and the following rush of adrenaline gives Hermione just enough strength to push him off of her, even if it's only for a second. "Cormac, please get off me."

He removes his mouth from her neck and narrows his eyes at her. "What?"

"I don't want to do this."

He doesn't move. "You serious?"

"Yes, I'm serious," says Hermione, her tone steady and firm.

"You agreed to leave the bar with me. What do you think I meant by that?" Cormac's face is reddening, and Hermione's palms respond by breaking out in a sweat. "Fucking tease."

"Hermione!"

A familiar voice — one that typically irritates her to her core — draws Cormac's attention away from Hermione for a split second, long enough to take a breath.

"We're busy here," he quips but pauses when he sees Lavender Brown, clad in a tight pink skirt and sparkly kitten heels. "Oh, hello there—"

"I can see that," says Lavender, narrowing her eyes at Hermione, who sends her a pleading glance. "But I have to steal Hermione away. It's an emergency."

Hermione's shoulders instantly relax — the irony of this being Lavender's second "emergency" excuse of the day isn't lost on her.

"It's not the best time," says Cormac. "But you're welcome to join us."

"Tempting. What's your room number?" she asks, batting her eyelashes while simultaneously reaching for Hermione's arm. "Maybe we'll meet you there in a bit."

Cormac grins as Hermione slips out from between his body and the wall. "I'm in room 407. I'll be waiting."

"Perfect! See you soon," says Lavender, looping Hermione's arm over her shoulder and turning her down the hall again.

Hermione can hear Cormac's content chuckles as they round the corner. As soon as they're out of his sight, she slips from Lavender's arm, instantly annoyed by her again.

"Why did you do that?" She tries to hide her irritation, but it escapes into her tone.

Lavender raises her eyebrows. "Um, you're welcome."

A tingle of guilt almost causes Hermione to apologize, but the uncomfortable notion of owing Lavender stops her. "I didn't need you to swoop in and save me. I had it under control."

Lavender scowls at her. "Well, from my perspective, it looked like he was going to take advantage of you right there in that hallway, so my instincts kicked in. Next time, I just won't bother."

They slow to a stop at room 210, and Lavender whips out her room key. "You're welcome to come in — I didn't think you'd want him to know where your room was. Especially since it's on the same floor as his."

The floodgates holding back Hemione's guilt break, and she's suddenly overwhelmed with appreciation for the girl holding open the door. She smiles sheepishly at Lavender as she passes her and enters the room.

"Thank you, Lavender. I'm… I'm sorry."

Lavender follows her in and lets the door shut behind her. "It's fine. I know we don't exactly get along, but I'd like to think you'd do the same for me."

"I would." This, Hermione is sure of. At least, she thinks she is. If not, she should self-reflect, but that's an ordeal for sobriety.

"I'll make tea," says Lavender.

Hermione takes a seat at the kitchen bar, and silence fills the room. Her head collapses into her hands, and she gets lost in her thoughts while the water boils.

Tonight could have been an utter disaster.

Although thankful for Lavender's intervention — she shouldn't have left the bar with Cormac in the first place — there's a part of her that blames Lavender for it all. It was Hermione's jealousy that drove her to cling to the first guy to show interest tonight. She's hesitant to thank Lavender for fixing a problem she created in the first place.

The tea kettle whistles and jolts Hermione away from her thoughts.

Lavender pours her a cup and slides it over to Hermione, along with a bottle of aspirin.

"That will help you sober up."

"Thanks," grumbles Hermione.

Then Lavender takes a seat next to Hermione and says something that changes everything.

"I didn't have sex with Ron earlier today."

Hermione freezes, her mind overwhelmed with a tidal wave of rioting thoughts that can somehow be stripped down to one single word.

"What?"

Lavender sips her tea, her hand trembling. From nerves? Jealousy? Anger? Hermione doesn't know.

"When I came out of Ron's room and buttoned up my blouse, I was pretending." She glances away as she says it, her cheeks reddening under a blanket of foundation.

Hermione sighs, doing her best to steady her breath as to not give away the sheer amount of emotions Lavender just ignited. "Why… why did you do that?"

Lavender shrugs. "Honestly? I'm not entirely sure. I went to his room with the intention of flirting with him. We'd just slept together a few days ago, and I thought it would be the same. It wasn't the same."

Hermione's sudden envy doesn't make sense, and she knows that; she had no claim to Ron a few days ago. She has no claim to him now, really, so her relief that they didn't sleep together today has no bearing.

So is the fact that she just poured water over him and paraded around another bloke to 'get back at him' for something he never did. Hermione's stomach bubbles with nausea, and not from the alcohol.

"What happened in his room?" Hermione asks, aiming for a neutral tone.

Lavender sends her a sideways glance before answering, and according to her expression, Hermione's casual questions aren't fooling her at all.

"I saw you two at the bar, and I got jealous. I want him back so badly, and I thought this week in Vegas would finally make it happen. But his eyes have been on you since day one, and I don't understand. You and I are so different."

Different we are, thinks Hermione as she pulls another sip of tea to drown out her sudden self-consciousness.

"I can tell he's interested in you. He's expressed interest in other girls since we've broken up, but they always looked like me, and I would just pretend that was the reason he was looking. I can't do that with you."

Lavender's not straight-up insulting Hermione, but it feels that way, so her defenses start to rise. All Hermione can hear is, 'How can Ron be interested in someone like you?'

She's still avoiding Hermione's eye contact when she continues, "I got so jealous and insecure, and thought, 'why would Ron be interested in me, when he could have someone like Hermione?' Someone smart, successful, someone who doesn't need male attention to feel good about herself."

Hermione nearly drops her tea. She was way off the mark.

"I gave it one last-ditch effort. I followed him to his room, tried to flirt, and he rejected me. It confirmed he was interested in someone else, and he didn't have to tell me who. So when I saw you in the hallway, my instinct was to try and sabotage it."

Lavender finally looks at Hermione, and there are tears glistening in her eyes. Clearly, she feels awful.

She's not the only one.

"When I saw that guy basically forcing himself on you, I felt awful. I knew something bad must have gone down between you and Ron."

Hermione's eyes sting with tears, and Lavender notices. "I'm sorry."

"I'm sorry too." Lavender smiles and wipes away the remaining tears from her eyes. "Okay, get out."

"What?" says Hermione, affronted, but then looks to see that Lavender's still grinning.

"You seem sober enough now, and we're still not friends. But at least you know that… it's not about you," she laughs, and finally making sense of Lavender's dry humor, Hermione can't help but laugh back.

"Men," says Hermione, and it's all she needs to say for Lavender to snort.

"Are the worst," she continues. "But Ron's a good one. Go find him at the bar. He's probably looking for you."

"About that," says Hermione, and Lavender's eyes narrow in curiosity. "He got kicked out. I splashed water on him, and then he punched Cormac."

Her eyes widen. "Wow."

"Yeah," says Hermione, swirling her tea.

"So he's probably wallowing in his room," she grumbles. "I'd tell you to go there, but seeing as he's my ex-boyfriend and I still want him, it's a conflict of interest."

Hermione gets to her feet. "Then I'll go somewhere else."

"And I don't want to know."

Hermione sends a thankful smile Lavender's way and turns toward the door.

"Lavender?"

"Yeah?"

"I misjudged you. I'm sorry."

Lavender contemplates her for a moment, then nods. "I misjudged you too."

It's enough closure for the pair to part peacefully — no admissions of friendship, but clarity on where they stand. And it's more than Hermione can hope for.

Lavender turns away to wipe a tear, and Hermione smiles again as she passes through the door and into the hall. The pit in her stomach has morphed into something else entirely — empathy, gratitude, and a small nugget of guilt.

As for right now, she only has one pressing matter on her to-do list.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #365

“i’m numb to the pleasure, but still feel the pain”

Are there palm trees where you live? No. Do you own any Hello Kitty stuff? If so, what? No. What’s your favorite flavor of ice pop? Blue raspberry. Do you like animal print? What’s your favorite print? Not really. I think animal "print" only really looks nice on, well, animals. Does your dad have any facial hair? Yes. What do you think of foot tattoos? They're not my favorite, but some look nice. I myself wanna get "11121" (a Silent Hill 4 reference) "carved" onto the top of my feet. Do you like bugs or do they scare you? Some do. I've gotten more into them though as my passion for tarantulas expanded to other inverts, like mantises. Ever seen the movie Chernobyl Diaries? If so, did you like it? If not, do you want to see it? I haven't, but I'd be willing to watch it. I find the whole Chernobyl incident to be extremely fascinating, so I'd probably like it. Did your senior class in high school have a class trip? Where did you go? Bitch I wish. :/ Do you have an instagram account? What’s your username? Yeah, two: brittanymphotography and eldritch_obscura. Do you like Gir from Invader Zim? I think he's cute. Do you or would you ever own a gun? Why or why not? No thanks. If I'm not mistaken, I can't legally obtain one anyway because of my suicidal history. I'm fine with having like, pepper spray and a bat handy by the bed, lol. If it was offered for free by a professional, would you get your hair dyed platinum blonde? For FREE? Fuck yeah I'd try it. What do you normally order at Dunkin Donuts? A chocolate frosted donut, and sometimes a plain/cake one. Do you watch football? Favorite teams? No. What about WWE? Favorite wrestler? That's an even bigger no. Funniest thing you’ve ever heard a teacher say? Okay so this is hard to actually explain and it be funny. I had this amazing, kinda charismatically awkward history teacher in high school, and when talking about some legal stuff I can't remember, she deadass quoted "Without Me" by Eminem ("if the FCC won't let me be...") like so casually and everyone fucking died, just from knowing her and her personality. It was just very unexpected. Do you wear a lot of makeup? What do you think of girls who do? No. Girls can wear however much makeup they please. Do you have a savings account? Are you good at saving money? No. I can't really answer the second question because of me never having a steady flow of money. Would you rather have a relationship or casual flings? Relationship, 100%. I would never have a casual fling. Do you know anyone that’s part Native American? Yes. Who was your favorite Spice Girl? I remember none of them. Have you ever tried to poison someone? Yikes, no. Have you ever saved anyone from a fire? No. Have you ever had a seizure? No. I've had sudden spasms, but never a full-on seizure. Have you ever had an out-of-body experience? No. Have you ever had a black eye? No. Have you ever had a tooth pulled? No. Have you ever had pneumonia? I have not. Have you ever had tubes put in your ears? Yes, as a baby. Have you ever been shot with an arrow or bullet? Thank god no. Have you ever had kidney stones? No. Have you even been bitten by an venomous animal? No. Have you ever thought about being in the military? Fuck no. I wouldn't qualify, anyway. Have you ever been sedated or put under anesthesia? Yeah. Have you ever used shrooms or any other hallucinogen? No. What upcoming event are you most looking forward to? I can barely believe my tat appointment is almost here lakjsd;ajwlej;rwe What was the last song you heard? I'm currently listening to Motionless In White's synthwave edit of "Voices" they just put out. I looooove it. What time did you wake up today? Maybe like, 5:20? Is there a vase in the room you’re in? No. Have you recently been insulted? Yes. Compared to someone else of your age and gender; do you feel that you have a lot to offer someone? N O P E How many days a week do you work? I'm unemployed. Is there ONE person you feel more connected to than others? Yes. What is your worst relationship quality? I obsess over the person probably leaving, so especially at the beginning, I'm paranoid and distrustful. I want to emphasize that I'm not the asshole that snoops through her partner's phone out of distrust, but still, the fear is just there. What was your most recent serious injury? A serious one? Man idk. I've had a lot or negligible and smaller ones, but a big one... *shrug* What were you most recently happy about? I was happy to see "synthwave" in this video title, haha. Are you a fan of cake? Oh yes. What is your favorite insect? Butterflies. Is your town beautiful? Ew, no. Do you prefer the city or the country? THE COUNTRY. Have you ever witnessed an eclipse? Lots of lunar eclipses. Do you wear lipstick often? No. You’re going on a date with someone you like. What would you like to do? Considering the pandemic, probably just like... grab fast food and sit and eat at a park. That'd be cute. You’re hanging out with your best friend. What would you like to do? It'd be nice to get back to Avatar: The Last Airbender while hanging out with Doris (her beardie that I adore), too. Have you ever written or considered writing a play? No. Who is considered the “black sheep” of your family? Why? Ha, me. To begin, I like all the "dark" stuff, I'm the unreligious one, the one with political beliefs unlike most of my family, I'm not doing what I should be... Why is your favorite movie your favorite movie? It's just a masterpiece. I love love love animals, African one especially, and I find it to be an amazing story of courage and dedication to family. Plus I shamelessly love all the songs, haha. What’s an odor you hate? GASOLINE. FUCK. What’s a sound you hate? Fingernails on a chalkboard. Or screech-y noises in general. If money was no issue, what would you like to do right now? I was initially gonna say go to Yellowstone, but fuck that hot weather this time of year. So, this brings us back to Venus' terrarium; I'd want to get a new one and better materials. What’s something you’re so good at that you take pride in your skill? I wouldn't say I'm "so good" at it, but I do take pride in my writing. What’s something you’d never ever dare to ask another person? Hm. Under ANY circumstance, I guess "are you pregnant?" There's almost like... no situation where I'd be comfortable asking somebody that. What’s the worst/best thing you’ve done without your parents knowing? We're not getting into that lmao. Do you know anyone who has a hearing deficit? No. What is one thing stopping you from becoming a veterinarian? I could never stand seeing so many hurt and dying animals and still be okay at the end of the day. Are there any opinions you used to have even a few years ago that you look back on and think, “I can’t believe I ever thought that way”? THERE ARE!!!!!!!!!!! A LOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The last time you cried, what was wrong? I fell and skinned my knees when stepping over this barrier Mom made to keep the damn dog out of the hallway and thus my room to fuck with the cat and eat his food. I previously twisted my ankle, fell backwards, and had one other accident with it despite moving stuff, and I didn't cry from pain, just massive frustration. I want this dog GONE. Do you like multi-choice tests or tests you have to write out? Multiple choice. Who last called you ‘beautiful’? Couldn't tell ya, bud. Have you ever caught a firefly? Yeah, I did that lots as a kid. Do you own any camouflage? No. What’s the stinkiest pet you’ve ever had? Uhhh I dunno. Have you ever been on the news? For what? No. Have you ever seen one of your friends get arrested? No. Do you put sprinkles on anything? No, I hate sprinkles. How do you like your steak? Medium well. Long hair on guys: yes or no? Yaaaaaaaas. Is there a basement in your house? If so, what is it used for? No. When was the last time you started a new medication? It's been a while. What is your favourite type of nut? Cashews, I think. Where did you eat the best pizza you’ve ever eaten in your life? I'm so fuckin basic, like my genuine answer is Domino's lmaooo. Did you ever watch The Rugrats when you were a kid? Yeah, I loved that show. I even had the two video games; I was obsessed with the first one in particular. Do you know anyone who was adopted? Yes. Do your parents’ professions match their college degrees? No. Do you write shopping lists on paper or just remember it in your head? I don't do the shopping, so. But I would definitely need to write it down. Have you ever used a lawnmower? No. Have you ever consumed so much alcohol that you vomited? No. Can you tie balloons? No, actually. My hands are just too shaky. When was the last time you were at a pet store? A few weeks ago when we got rats for Venus. Ugh, it is SO overpriced; they come in a box of two, and as I feed her twice a month, it's honestly quite a bit of money. Like if I remember correctly, it's around $16. FOR TWO. SMALL. RATS. I've recommended we just buy them in bulk NOT from an overpriced chain pet store, but the problem with that is then we have *too* many, and the nutritional value of frozen rats apparently does degrade with time, so I don't want to feed my snake poor food. So it's just an annoying thing we have to do. Have you ever taken a pregnancy test? Not like, an at-home one. I've been tested before surgery, but that was just a safety protocol. Does your ex still think about you? "The" ex, probably not. Honestly, who is the last person to tell you that they love you? My mom. What is the last state you were in besides your own? Virginia. Would you go down to see the Titanic if given the chance? Man, that's kinda tempting. Maybe. It'd be super cool. Have you ever seen the Hollywood sign in real life? No. Did you ever see a scorpion in the wild? No, they don't live here. Do you type the proper way? Have you ever typed on a manual typewriter? Yes to both. What was your maternal grandmother’s first name? Cecelia. Name a word that people use locally that outsiders probably can’t pronounce. Conetoe. You said it wrong.

[punkscowardschampions]

James & Ava

James: Good morning

James: how are you, darling?

Ava: Sleepy 🥱

Ava: but all the better starting my day with you, of course

Ava: how about you? 😊

James: hopeful that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, because likewise

James: & my cautious optimism doesn’t extend to the viewing I’m currently heading to

Ava: Oh, how have they oversold this one, I wonder

Ava: the adverts are nothing short of epic fiction

Ava: there should be awards for how they can spin any - into like +++

Ava: Where are you headed?

James: it would be inspirational if I were solely doing research for the novel but alas I need a suitable study first

James: [somewhere that’s one of the places we discounted]

Ava: I can believe estate agents are all unfulfilled creatives, definitely

Ava: I’ll 🤞 all my fingers and toes that it’s the one

Ava: though I could tell you more pubs and clubs in that area than nurseries…

James: absolutely up there with the teaching profession in terms of both dashed dreams setting them on that path & a litany of thankless tasks once they get there

James: thank you though

James: I’ll let you know if it constitutes enough of a disaster to warrant theoretically drowning my sorrows, after all, there isn’t a huge difference between some of the clubs Teddy frequents & soft play so I’ve no doubt my aide for today would be thrilled to hear every suggestion

Ava: You cannot make me feel bad for teachers today

Ava: not when Mr Hawthorne has beat you to it with the against argument in the form of his 🥱 inducing lectures

Ava: 😅 I don’t think foam parties are safe for anyone, 1-year-olds especially so though

James: there’s an argument to be made that I possess the ability to do so, however, if I’m going to use my powers of persuasion for anything 😈 I would argue it is indeed wasted on Mr Hawthorne

James: oh well in that case, the hunt for my sister’s baby shower venue also continues

Ava: If you used your powers of persuasions on Mr Hawthorne, I might be a tiny bit jealous

Ava: not to mention almost as confused as he would undoubtedly be

Ava: Joy of joys

Ava: it would be typical for that to be added to your to-do list as well, but at least a place for grown women to eat chocolate bars out of nappies isn’t as much like gold dust as a decent place in central

James: I’m jealous that he’s spending time with you right now, despite your attention being less than rapt & therefore promise to do nothing that benefits him in any way whatsoever

James: including, but not limited to, refusing to assist you in the homework he intends to set by being as distracting as I can later as well as now

James: you’re not wrong, but she is her belief that to this day I remain blacklisted by an extremely high percentage of clubs, thus sparing me being delegated the role even in these hypothetical planning stages

Ava: That would be a wild rumour, even for this place

Ava: and what can I say? You’re more worthy of my time and attention

Ava: as you’ve just proved 😍

Ava: Definite blessing in disguise

Ava: Will it be a women-only event?

James: I’d be lying if I didn’t say I miss you & am always willing to prove how much at every given opportunity

James: god, I hope so, even a foam party isn’t enough of an incentive to get me there if I am expected

Ava: I miss you too

Ava: I can come see you tonight though, if you’re free

Ava: sadly, I don’t think I can make a soft-play date so that’ll have to be just you two

Ava: and you��re lucky, I’ve been to so many baby showers it’s not even funny

James: I’m supposed to work late to make up the time I’ve taken off this morning but I can do that when you’re busy

James: that’s a shame, I’ll have to throw myself in the ball pit

James: time will tell if you have an invite to Diana’s, what’s incredibly lucky is that she won’t expect you to actually attend regardless of how you RSVP

Ava: Only if you’re sure

Ava: my plans can always be more fluid than yours

Ava: Ugh 😞 I’d LOVE to push you into a ball pit right now, life is unfair

Ava: I don’t think she was impressed with my party-planning skills enough to put in that call

James: I am very sure that I want to spend tonight with you instead of at the office

James: & I’m also suddenly determined to create our very own ball pit in the new place

James: [pictures like which room do you think we should fill with plastic balls lol but let’s say it’s all really small]

James: having to forgo a traditional master bedroom isn’t at all unfair, I’ll obviously sleep like a baby among the balls

Ava: 🥰

Ava: An absolute must

Ava: why brag of a ‘cosy’ third bedroom when you can boast a gigantic ball pit

Ava: I bet the girls would be more than willing for you to do that too

Ava: Party house has a whole new meaning 🥳

James: indeed

Ava: I hope there’s not too many people there this time though, really

James: I think there are more people here than at the last viewing we went to, impossible as that sounds

Ava: 😫 How, where do all these people spring from?!

Ava: At least you’re far more eligible than most young professionals

Ava: If I was looking for a model renter

James: what a pity you aren't, your rooftop garden has much greater appeal for this particular young professional, not least because I've seen its existence with my own eyes

Ava: If my landlords weren’t so involved…

Ava: This place is far too big for us now

James: hopefully they won't drag you along on yet more insufferable viewings if, or when, they decide to downsize since you're an undeniable pro now, because for that, there would only so many apologies I can offer you

Ava: I’m sure mum’s already getting the planning permission sorted for if and when

Ava: Sadly their portfolio doesn’t extend to a reasonable price range, I did ask

Ava: but if it isn’t something that would get her in Architect Digest, or whatever, she’s not interested so

Ava: As you said, it would be fun in a way, if all this looking didn’t mean you were still without your perfect family home

Ava: It takes people watching to a new level, and seeing the landlord’s ‘decor’ choices is also as revealing

James: it's okay, being indebted to my own parents is quite enough

James: it's becoming clear if my father visualizes me living here it's because he's done a drastic rewrite of the type of young professional I am

James: I could see you here, for instance, in a draft where I don't exist as your love interest, but in terms of a family home, perfect of otherwise, where we'd put Frank & the children is anyone's guess

James: perhaps some of these people are imagining wild architecture projects the likes of which your mother would have to act undaunted by, who's to say

Ava: I don’t love that rewrite

Ava: Frank is particularly demanding with how much space he needs to recline, relax, snooze and sleep…

Ava: You’ll find somewhere soon, I know it

Ava: If nothing else, this dull lesson is giving me all the time to refresh and refresh and repeat every listing I can find

James: cautious optimism as ever for our 2nd attempt

James: [deets because I'm gonna say that this is one he ends up loving that falls through somehow at some stage because how real and frustrating and then she can be the one who finds their forever home and they can look at it together]

Ava: Okay, I can picture that one

Ava: light and airy isn’t actually a lie this time, what a concept

Ava: 😍

Ava: All the rooms are a good size so you wouldn’t feel as if either girl was getting the short straw, and you won’t have to settle for sleeping amongst the balls either

James: I do have a genuinely good feeling about it, terrifying as that is to admit in our present surroundings where it feels as though someone will sense it & immediately swoop in, but yes

Ava: I know

Ava: It’s one of those things

Ava: You have to be cautious, because so many roadblocks are between you and the end goal

Ava: but similarly, how can you be, when it’s such a big life thing

Ava: You can be as honest and optimistic as you like with me, it doesn’t need to go any further, shark-like buyers and the girls alike

James: we aren’t anywhere close to the stressful moving in stage & I’m already acutely aware that I wouldn’t have survived up until now without your help, so I will, as long as you know the continued support is appreciated beyond words or any other measure

Ava: Stressful, but fun

Ava: you get to pick what colour your new room is 😌

Ava: It’ll be reward enough, to see you get the fresh start you deserve

James: [whatever her fave colour is] of course

James: then you won’t mind seeing me covered from head to toe in it, potentially indefinitely, when we discover I can’t fit in the tub at the new place either

Ava: Oh, I don’t think I would mind that no matter the colour

Ava: but I also would not mind you having an amazing shower so we could take care of that

James: if there isn’t I won’t mind adding it to my renovations to-do list

Ava: As long as I’m on that list too I’m happy

James: the top of any list I write is where I’m happy to put you

Ava: If you put in a bid, you should do it at/even over asking price, so they’ll take attention of you and then you can make a list of repairs/quality checks etc you want done before you agree to move in, then if they do them, they’re done for you, but more likely, they’ll not want to, and you can say take that cost off my offer then

Ava: one of the 💡 tips I’ve picked up and you’d undoubtedly thought of yourself but there we go

James: here’s where I could nod & keep up the pretense to avoid giving away what a total novice I am, but there’s very little point given than you know I’ve never done this, & a list of countless other things as long as my arm, for myself before

James: instead I’ll just take your advice & thank you accordingly

Ava: There’s so much we don’t get prepared for

Ava: even under normal circumstances

Ava: It isn’t as if I was told that at school, or I get told anything vaguely useful on the day-to-day by Hawthorne or any of the others worse or marginally better than him

Ava: You shouldn’t feel like you’re alone in feeling unprepared, is what I’m failing to say

Ava: Lots of people feel it, that’s why I could never just stay here, in the bubble of SW forever

James: don’t worry, you aren’t failing at anything where this conversation is concerned & whilst it is somewhat overwhelming at times, I don’t feel alone because I’ve got you to talk it through with

James: what that school taught me, all that living here has taught me, was how to avoid facing up to situations by lying & name dropping, which probably would assist me in climbing the property ladder but I’d rather be honest, if the bubble bursts as a result, I’m prepared for that from now on

Ava: I’m proud of you

Ava: and the girls will be too

Ava: It can be fun, and there are some good people here, just as there are everywhere

Ava: but outside of the postcode, the currency of who you know and where you went to school, it’s just not real, irrelevant

Ava: I don’t want to rely on my parents’ hard work, let alone someone else’s father knowing the crest on my blazer, you know

James: yes, I know exactly what having to rely on my father feels like, it isn’t fun or something to be proud of & it definitely isn’t a precedent I’d like to keep setting for my daughters

James: the stark reality & contrast of this fresh start needs to happen soon, while I still have Jay here to teach

Ava: She’s not going anywhere

James: she’s going to have to meet him eventually even if that’s under the guise of him being one of my old friends or your brother

Ava: And I understand that that’s fair

Ava: to him, I don’t know how to feel about it in regards to Jay, and it’s not even my job to so I know how hard this must be for you

Ava: but that doesn’t mean he should get to ‘keep’ her, for God’s sake, she has had no idea who he is until now, you’re her dad

James: I have to hope that he’ll understand that too, he’s not the villain here, as much as it would make my life easier to paint him as such

Ava: I hope so too

James: it’ll be okay, for her, I don’t know if I can make the same promise for us but I want to be able to

Ava: Don’t put yourself down like that

Ava: It wouldn’t be okay if she lost you

James: she isn’t going to lose me whatever Buster decides to do next, things may have to change but never that drastically, I’ll always be in her life

Ava: Providing he plays that nicely

Ava: I’m just scared he’ll do something that drastic, and stupid

James: if he doesn’t I won’t, I’m not afraid to fight fire with fire should that be the only option he leaves me with

Ava: Good

Ava: I wish I could promise it won’t be

Ava: but I don’t know what he will be prepared to do, so you should be prepared for any and all eventualities too

James: I am, my marriage made sure I was equipped to anticipate the unexpected & not to expect rational responses

Ava: Yeah, of course

Ava: Still no word from Chloe?

James: no & no trace of a belated birthday card

Ava: Typical

Ava: Good thing Mattie got spoiled by you and had a great party already

James: Jay is devastated she has to wait so long for you to throw one for her though, maybe we can find a way to cater the housewarming party to her

Ava: Awh, bless her

Ava: If there’s one thing Chelsea HAS taught me, is that you only need a vague notion of an idea to have a party and celebrate

Ava: Does she like fireworks?

James: she LOVES fireworks, if you weren’t in Dublin she’d have insisted you come with us to [wherever we’re gonna go see some on the night]

Ava: I am pretty gutted I can’t

Ava: but I’ll have to get some sparklers, probably not Catherine Wheels or Roman Candles, and do a belated bonfire themed do for her

Ava: smores are a good idea any night

James: I wonder if she’ll expect us to dye her hair red, orange or yellow this time

Ava: 😬 accidentally set a precedent

Ava: thank god for washouts

James: I’ll do what I can to have her convinced that face paint is a much better idea by the time you get back but she’s no Mr Hawthorne so

Ava: I admire a girl who requires more than a persuasive essay

Ava: you’ll have a great time

Ava: 🤞 the endless family drama doesn’t get in the way of me having one too

James: no amount of Catherine Wheels or Roman Candles could prevent me from being on the end of the phone whether you aren’t having a great time or simply want to tell me how much fun it is

Ava: You’re the best ❤️

Ava: It should be fine

Ava: If anything, hopefully someone else is bringing more drama than my parents or siblings could accuse me of, then it’ll really give them a bit of perspective 🤫

James: if your family resembles the dynamic of mine even slightly I won’t have to keep anything crossed in order to make that happen for you, but of course I will nevertheless, just in case

Ava: How soon is too soon to clue you in on my mad family dynamic 🤔😅

Ava: Maybe when you’re in your new home, so you have a door to politely shut in my face

James: having never kept an air of mystery there I can understand why you’d want to, but I would never christen my new front door like that

Ava: It was like an unspoken rule, when Buster was here too

Ava: I don’t really care that much, and anyway, he broke it big time

Ava: Every family has struggles and secrets, or are long overdue their share if not

James: I couldn’t agree more, my mother acts as though nobody else has skeletons hung up next to their hideously expensive coats & we must stay silent come what may, but she’s the last person to feign shock when any of said secrets inevitably come out

Ava: It’s such a waste of time and energy

Ava: not to mention resolves precisely (0) of said troubles, if and when they can be

Ava: I’m so glad you don’t want to keep up pretenses together

Ava: wouldn’t make for a very interesting story

James: exactly, if I adhered to her code of silence I wouldn’t have gone to rehab or spent any time & energy on recovery, god knows what trouble I’d be in right now in that instance, but we certainly wouldn’t have this plotline to delight in

Ava: Being dubious about the potential results, maybe

Ava: but the idea your own mum would rather you suffer in silence, literally, is beyond me

James: it’s an attitude worthy of an outdated classic novel, for sure, that we can all take ourselves in hand & address our flaws with a firm word or two but she isn’t alone in her 'you don't need outside help, you just need to learn and then follow through with setting your own limits' mentality

James: in my parents' defence I was still young, despite the baby I wasn't looking after properly or the wedding I don't remember very much of at all, & I know they'd argue, if pressed, that was the main reason for their anti-rehab stance

James: therefore, I'd like to believe, however naively perhaps, on this occasion it isn't entirely about saving face with yet more pretense but rather a glimpse at some character development for both of them, if only so the novel isn't doomed by one dimensional subplots, naturally

Ava: I can see that too, again, a lot of people’s problems go unaddressed or at least are allowed to get worse because the person is ‘too young’ for it to either be a problem, or it is something they will ‘bounce back’ from once they ‘calm down’ and mature

Ava: It doesn’t make your parents the devil, I wouldn’t suggest as much, nor the first people to fall into that trap

Ava: There are definitely instances of the exact same mindset I can point to within my own family

Ava: We’d all like to see the best in people, and sometimes, that desire lets us down

James: regardless this viewing has yet to let me down unlike the previous

James: I wish you were here

Ava: With any luck, I’ll be able to come see it with you next time

Ava: The pictures look great, trying to keep the optimism at the cautious level still but 🤞🤞😌

James: need I remind you I like your optimism as unabashed as your excitement

Ava: You don’t need to

Ava: but I wouldn’t be opposed

James: [tell her about whatever cute and romantic plans you've sorted for you two tonight so she'll be happy and excited]

Ava: How have you managed to sort that whilst at these viewings and also with Mattie 😍

James: it appears I’m guilty of similarly high levels of enthusiasm & so the greater crime would be letting it go to waste

Ava: AND being an excellent multi-tasker AND AND an even greater romantic

James: Mattie can & will take full credit for the former but the romanticism is a newly acquired skill that I’m still trying to find my feet with, & entirely down to you

Ava: I should feel bad for keeping it all for myself

James: I disagree but I’ll happily rush through the book’s publication if sharing will make you feel better

Ava: Should doesn’t mean would or could

Ava: because I don’t

Ava: It’s nice not being secret, but I’m still happy keeping you to myself for a while longer

James: oh good, because I’d rather continue to multitask like this than on a novel deadline

Ava: Being anything but a reprieve from all the other drains on your time is not very romantic heroine of me, so never

Ava: what would the readers think

James: you’ve got me there, by evoking how fickle our readers are more than likely to prove themselves to be, but I don’t think you have anything to worry about

Ava: You either think the protagonist is ‘relatable’ or you hate her because you deserve the love interest far more than her

James: nobody deserves me more than you, they’ll have no choice but to appreciate you

Ava: James

James: Ava

Ava: I can’t wait to see you later

James: can I pick you up from school or do you need to go home first?

Ava: I don’t need to go home 😊

James: I’ll see you there then, unfortunately, I have work to get back to & I’ve kept you from yours for longer than I responsibly should have, lest you end up at Kings after all

Ava: 🙄 I’m sure my career’s officer would tell me they’re higher in the rankings or something else that isn’t going to change my mind more than your experience and my own, however brief

Ava: If I were rating them on chance, perfect meetings, however

Ava: A++

Ava: I’ll see you later then, try not to get TOO exhausted by soft play 😏❤️

James: I’ll be certain to tell them now that’s not a secret, it wouldn’t surprise me if they used us a ringing endorsement for some kind of meet-cute society to take place weekly in The Vault

James: the allure of soft play meanwhile needs no advertising, with or without any single mothers trying to engineer romantic entanglements of their own

Ava: I’ll square that with my conscience and you run that gauntlet, love

James: I’ll do my best

[thatfanficstuff]

The Light in my Darkness - 9

Pairing: Clint x Reader

Warning: nope

****

By the time Friday came, all of your furniture had been delivered and set up. You were even mostly unpacked, though that wasn’t much of a feat considering most of your belongings were art supplies. You’d even found time to pick up the books and supplies you’d need for the semester. And, as you predicted, Clint gave you entirely too much money.

It was midafternoon when someone buzzed to be let in. “Yeah.”

“It’s me,” came Wanda’s chipper voice.

You grinned and let her in. You already had the front door open before she arrived, arms heavy with bags and packages. “Holy crap, Wanda. Are you moving in or what?” you joked as you unburdened her of some of the load.

“I come bearing gifts,” she announced as she dropped the rest of the things on your sofa. “And to help you get ready for your date.”

Your face heated. “It’s not a date.”

She rolled her eyes. “Fine. Then I’m here to help you get ready for your not date.”

You sat the things in your hands on the table and shut and locked the front door. “Not that I’m not thrilled to see you, but you aren’t exactly what I was expecting when Clint said he would send me a dress.”

“I volunteered so I could help with your hair and makeup. Besides, I’m having fun tormenting him. He keeps waiting for me to yell at him for dating you. The more accepting and nicer I am about things, the more paranoid he gets. It’s amazing.”

You couldn’t help but chuckle. “I’m still not trusting it entirely myself.”

“I have my reasons, thank you. Now, look at the dress.” She thrust a box in your direction.

After taking it from her, you sat it on the counter in the kitchen to open it. You tossed the lid to the side and peeled back the tissue paper to reveal a stunning royal blue dress. When you pulled it out to hold it up, you were surprised at the weight though that was undoubtedly due to the beads on the bodice. It certainly wasn’t from the light, airy fabric that made up the layered skirt. “It’s beautiful.”

Wanda nodded. “And there are matching shoes and a clutch. There’s even jewelry around here somewhere.” She glanced around at the boxes.

You frowned and tucked the dress back into the box. “This is a lot.”

She tilted her head and looked you over. “If it makes you feel any better, he probably had the personal shopper at the store pick out everything. That’s what he usually does.”

It did make you feel better, but also a little disappointed. You sighed. What the hell was wrong with you? “I’ll order pizza. You want the usual?”

She nodded and began hauling everything back to your bedroom.

***

Clint glanced at the time and tapped his fingers on his desk before checking his phone for the third time in ten minutes. He had expected to hear from you after the dress and things were delivered. He was worried you wouldn’t like it. He hadn’t given you enough time to find something else if you didn’t.

He groaned and pinched the bridge of his nose. He shouldn’t even be caring. Normally, he wouldn’t. Of course, he also normally didn’t tell the shopper what color of dress he wanted or take the time to pick out the jewels himself. He’d only done it because he didn’t want Wanda thinking he didn’t care about you. She’d seemed pleased so maybe it worked.

Or maybe she was just waiting until his guard was down to tell him he was a dirty old man for lusting after her best friend. It was a conversation he tried to have with himself more than once, but it wasn’t working. The chemistry between the two of you was too intense for him to care. He shifted in his seat as he remembered the last time he’d seen you. Work had kept him busy the last couple of days, though the two of you had still managed to text often.

Finally unable to take the suspense any longer, he sent you a text. Does everything meet expectations?

You responded almost immediately. It’s Wanda. I took her phone. She kept wanting to send you pictures.

He chuckled. And?

No pictures. She says everything is lovely and thank you.

That didn’t sound like you at all. He pursed his lips and wondered what his daughter was up to. Really?

No she says you spent too much. Must go.

Now, that sounded like you. His mouth twisted into a smirk as he imagined how flustered you’d been when you saw everything he’d sent. A glance at the clock had him wondering if you’d even seen the jewelry yet. Knowing Wanda, she’d keep it tucked away until you were ready to walk out the door.

***

“Well,” you asked as you spun for Wanda to take in the entire ensemble. She had managed to make your hair look like you’d spent tons at a salon and made your makeup look dramatic but subtle at the same time. She had a far more deft hand than you’d ever had.

She beamed and you couldn’t help but smile in return. “One more thing.” When she came over, she had a velvet box in her hands. She flipped it open and you gasped.

“Those aren’t real.” It wasn’t a question, it was a statement of fact. Because if they were real, there was absolutely no way you could wear them. Not only would it mean Clint had spent entirely too much money on you, but you would need an armed guard to make you feel comfortable in public.

Wanda frowned at them then looked back to you. “They aren’t? Because I’m fairly certain they are.”

You shook your head and took a step back.

“Don’t be ridiculous,” she snapped and you immediately stopped moving. Wanda could be scary when she wanted to be. She handed you the box and your hands trembled as you took it from her. “Now, put them on or I will put them on for you.”

You took a deep breath and gave her a nod of compliance. The necklace was an intricate design of diamonds and sapphires. The clear stones formed a vine of leaves that wrapped around your neck dotted with sapphire flowers. The earrings were simple sapphire teardrops. You looked at yourself in the mirror after you’d put them on and your fingers ran across the necklace. It was far more delicate than it had any right to be considering the amount of stones it contained. It was stunning.

That anyone thought you worthy of such a thing had tears coming to your eyes.

“No, no, no,” Wanda scolded behind you. “You will ruin your face.”

You laughed and wiped away the moisture before it could destroy her hard work. Just as you finished, there was a buzz. Your ride had arrived. Wanda buzzed back and let them know you would be right down.

“Come,” she said as she handed you the clutch that contained only your phone, keys and lipstick. After one last look in the mirror, you followed her out. You took the elevator, not caring to risk your neck by taking the stairs in your heels.

Wanda gave you a hug before heading to her car. Your gaze trailed her until she was safely inside and you turned to the car that was waiting for you. Scott grinned at you when you met his gaze. “You look great, Y/N.”

“Thank you.” A glance inside the car showed it to be empty. “Where’s Clint?”

“He’ll meet you at the venue. One of the company drivers is taking him. He had some work to finish up.”

You nodded and slid into the car, Scott helping you make sure all of your dress was tucked inside with you. A little lump of disappointment settled in the middle of your chest and you did your best to brush it aside. That’s not what this was. You knew that. It was a business arrangement. It was a mantra you needed to learn to repeat often.

You scrolled through your phone, reading over the texts between Wanda and Clint. You smiled then started typing one of your own.

***

Clint ran his hands down the front of his tux making sure everything was in place then straightened his bowtie. He had intended to meet you at your door, but a last minute contract issue had come across his desk that couldn’t wait until Monday. He preferred not to work weekends if it could be avoided.

A knock sounded on his door. “Yeah.”

It swung open to reveal Natasha. She smirked as she looked him over. “Looking sharp as always, Clint.”

He rolled his eyes. “Tell me again why I let you out of this event?”

“Because I send the RSVPs and I didn’t want to go. Besides, you’ve got your new girlfriend to accompany you. You’ll be fine.” Nat used to love to go to things with him. The two of them would hole up somewhere in a corner together and laugh away the night. Lately she’d been attending fewer and fewer.

He blamed Bucky. They’d known each other for years but had only recently started dating. Bucky didn’t do well around people he didn’t know and she was perfectly happy to just stay home with him. As long as she was happy, Clint tried not to complain.

“I actually have a purpose here besides ogling you in your tux. Did you rework the Johnson contract?”

He scowled. Johnson was a long time client who wanted to renegotiate his normal contract at the last minute. He had even threatened to take his business elsewhere if Hawkeye didn’t comply. Where he thought he was going to get merchandise of a comparable quality at the prices they offered, Clint had no idea. “It’s done and sent. I didn’t give him anything he wanted though I did compromise a bit. He either signs it or he doesn’t. I don’t like bullies.”

Nat nodded. “Perfect. That’s all I needed. Have a nice time on your date,” she said with a smirk and a little wave.

He wasn’t even going to bother to take the time to correct her. She only said shit like that to get under his skin. As he walked out of his office, his phone buzzed to let him know he had a text. He pulled it out and smiled when he saw it was from you. This really is too much.

He chuckled as he stepped onto the elevator. You’re welcome, he sent back.

Thank you, Clint.

He could almost feel your eyeroll through the screen. A glance at the time told him that you were already on your way to the venue. He didn’t like that you were going to have to mingle on your own for a bit, but he certainly wasn’t going to make you wait for him before you went in. He typed out a quick text letting you know he had gotten caught up and not to wait for him.

K

Your one letter response didn’t do much to convince him you would be fine until he got there. Rather than relaying all his fears to you, he slid his phone back into his pocket. He tapped his fingers on his thighs in an effort to keep from pulling it back out. This was fine. You’d be fine. You were too smart to say something you shouldn’t just because he wasn’t around. He’d also seen you shoot down more than one asshole that came on too strong so he knew you could take care of yourself.

It was almost forty-five minutes later before he arrived and a good half hour since Scott had let him know you’d been dropped off safely. Damn it. He straightened his jacket after he climbed out of the back then hurried up the stairs. Once he was inside, his eyes immediately scanned the crowd searching for you. It didn’t take long for his attention to be caught by the vibrant blue of your dress.

His heart sped and he swallowed past the lump in his throat. You were talking to some people he vaguely recognized, your head tilted back as you laughed. God, you looked amazing. He ran his eyes over you again, taking in every inch of exposed skin. The jewels he’d bought you sparkled in the light but they didn’t even come close to holding his attention the way that you did.

He ran his tongue across his bottom lip as he took the opportunity to just watch you for another moment or two.

“I see you’ve spotted her as well,” came a voice from beside him, interrupting him from his litany of impure thoughts.

He glanced over to find Tony Stark standing beside him, offering him a glass of something. Clint took it and turned back to his previous view. He made a sound of agreement but didn’t offer anything more where you were concerned. He sipped at his drink, enjoying the burn that distracted him from some of his more scandalous lines of thought.

“I don’t think I’ve seen her around before and I certainly would have made note of her,” Tony continued.

Clint clenched his teeth together briefly. He darted his gaze quickly to the man beside him before focusing on you once more. “What about Pepper?”

Tony shrugged. “What about her? Just because we’re engaged doesn’t mean I’m dead. I can still look and appreciate you know. And that one is stunning.”

Clint placed his now empty glass on the tray of a passing waiter and fixed his coat once more. “That she is. She’s also mine.” He headed in your direction without registering Tony’s reaction to his announcement.

When he reached you, he placed one hand on your hip and pulled you against his side. You were even more beautiful up close. He leaned down to whisper in your ear. “You are breathtaking, Y/N.”

You glanced over at him, a radiant smile on your face. “You’re not so bad yourself, Mr. Barton.” 

[thelocalshooter]

The Local Shooter Vs. Kira

(LS) Goodmorning thank you being part of this great come up, and welcome, so Kira; do you mind telling us where you’re from and why it is that you do?

(K) Originally I’m from Mesa but I been all around, I initially got into making music by making beats. This was when I was living In Alexandria Virginia, I had a homie who had the same interests in music as me and we would try to create our own version of shit we were listening to. The homie actually put me on to a lot of legends in this scene We were barley walking into. Those artists consist of Lil Ugly Mane, Supasortahuman, and SpaceGhostPurrp, just to name a few. These influences really shaped the type of sounds I was using in my beats. I eventually started releasing my beats as $limKira just before I turned 18. I would promote myself on twitter a lot by posting little snippets of beats I was working on at that time. People would fuck with it and I was really social on my Twitter at that time always working making new connections, always sending out beats that type of shit, I happened to find myself in a group chat full of artists that were from a lot of different parts of the country and I just kept building from there. Eventually I turned 18 and made my way back home to Az were all this music shit for me really started and where I Progressed into becoming an artist of my own. FuccKira.

(LS) Being from Arizona how do you feel the music scene has changed in the last couple years? I know we’ve had prior interaction through Ace McCain but doing it back then I’m sure was a bit more different and definitely harder based off the fact people didn’t really have venue selections, or even ways to get music recorded, but now everyone is throwing shoes left and right! Do you think Arizona separates themselves within groups or? As far as being an east valley or west valley artist.

(K) Not too familiar with Ace McCain but I’m really close with Multiplexes out there, he pretty much took me under his wing when everything else didn’t pan out as planned, really good and genuine dude he is. But to be honest I feel like I haven’t been in Arizona in so long I can’t give an opinion on the current state of the music scene, I know when I was out there in 2017-2018 the group I was with would get shows at club red or it’d be a warehouse show and shit would be jumpin. Recording wasn’t really a problem for me cause we’d just record at a homies crib or wherever we were staying at, it’s all about the mixing lmao but a lot of bridges since then have been burned so for me now it’s really a matter of staying true and making good music. Don’t get me wrong although the Music scene in Arizona can get hectic, it is definitely full of talent no matter where your from within it or who you fuck with out there, and just for the record I have love for everyone out there It takes a lot to be an artist and to be a successful one at that and so it’s always respect from my side.

(LS) You’ve released many projects and have done a handful of shows, why do you think you’re still missing as an artist? Are you constantly elevating yourself to be greater or are you still trying to figure it out yourself?

(K) Facts, I have released many tracks but they’re not anything I would say I’m proud of and that’s why I’m missing as an artist because I’m still trying to figure out what music I love making. I haven't truly focused on only myself or my own progression with my music and that’s another reason why I feel I’m still missing as an artist, my confidence behind each track needs to be 100% in order for me to drop and feel good about it. That’s why most of my tracks are on private and I’ve only got 3 tracks on my SoundCloud currently . They need to be worth listening. I want people to hear my music and want the next track immediately. Shows are always fun and give people a way of seeing a face behind the music, my experience with shows has taught me it really brings a better connection with your audience/fanbase when your up there performing what they been bumping on their own time, that was a big favorite of mine out there was seeing the energy at each show. I remember waking up the next day after my first show with my whole body sore ready to schedule the next one. As far as the question goes I’m still trynna figure myself out as an artist, but progress is definitely being made. I’m always looking to make a better track than my last, so I would also say it’s a goal of mine to continue to exceed my own Expectations.

(LS) What the next move? You currently dropped “Voodoo” (https://soundcloud.com/fucckira/voodoo-prod-srry ) over 48 hours ago, now do you plan on doing any visuals or are you already back in the booth?

(K) A visual would be cool for the track, I might look into getting one made for it if the track continues to do well. Visuals are 2nd to my priority when it comes to what I’m trynna do right now. Actually releasing quality music is my main focus right now but like I said I’d be down to do a video, I actually know a couple people that can get that done. As far as any new music I do have a song ready to release prod. rose (my lil bro) , it’s wild my lil bro watched me do all this shit as a kid and now he’s making beats for other artists and myself. Deadass makes better beats than I ever did and he makes em off his phone lmaoo fuck a beat pad kids only 15 too. No doubt in my mind he’s gonna be successful. Lil dude is already building connections wit people on his own it’s only a matter of time.

K- Goals for me this year is to really gain and maintain a steady fan base. Thats something I’ve always strived for and wanted, I love when people give me feedback on how the songs make them feel, like I said energy is a big thing for me. I also would like to finally figure myself out as an artist and find my own sound I feel like I’m on my way there. Besides music I fuck with clothes heavy my homie Albert owns a brand out there called Macabre, fuckin ridiculous. I don’t own a single shirt that doesn’t say macabre. Anyway I would be down to do modeling for any upcoming clothing designers or any street wear brands. I’ve done it in the past for Garza out in AZ, (idk if your familiar) but it’s pretty cool would love more opportunities like that from other designers/brands.

(LS) With music being a main focus for you I’m sure it has a heavy impact on your life, when do you first remember falling in love with music? Was it a certain track? A certain time in your life?

K- I remember the first major thing I did for

music was use the money I had saved up for a

car to buy a new computer to make music on

because my laptop had completely died. Had to use my skate board to get everywhere until I turned 18 and got a car lmao. During this time in my life my parents trust in me was at 0 so I pretty much was secluded to my room most of the time making beats and getting high. Music was all I had when I felt I had nothing so I believe buying that computer was a pretty fuckin good decision. Just wish I coulda used Uber back then lmao

(LS) As an artist, do you find it difficult to work with other artist? Especially other local artist? Being that everyone in Arizona has their own sound, do you usually go out of state for collabs or how does that work?

K- working with other artist isn’t hard at all. I’m very straight forward when it comes to the music ima be working on. If I dont fuck with it I’ll tell you and try to find something I can get a hit with us both on. As far as Collabs go I don’t like doing them if I’m being honest. Reason being I just truly believe I’m better off on my own shit UNLESS the energy is right. If we in the Stu and everything is going right and the engineer knows what he’s doing and everythings organic then fuck yeah that’s a collab ima fuck with. Dont get me wrong I still got collabs on the way. matter of fact I have a few with some artist out of El Paso, TX

Chris Apex , Saybien and Jesse Commas just to name a few.

(LS) Are you looking to stay independent? Or to sign a deal one day? What’s your game plan as far as career wise? And why? Which do you think will help you more in the long run?

K- I wouldn’t be opposed to signing a deal one day but the freedom of being an independent artists is something that would be hard to give up. I’m really early in this scene as far as being an artist so for now I’m just focused on releasing quality music and gaining a loyal fan base. I feel if my supporters are behind me with every track I drop it’s bound to bring me more opportunities in the future.

(LS) Making music for over 5 years already, what’s are some tips or struggles you faced as an artist you’d like to let new up and coming artist know? Any motivation you can give knowing how hard the grind is?

K- lmao don’t join any groups. Stick to yourself. Be transparent and be consistent! Don’t be scared to be social either that’s how you build connections. When I first started I would send beats to MY favorite artists for ex. Supasortahuman was one of the first artist to follow me back and support my music by telling me through dm. That was wild to me because like I said previously he was an inspiration for me when I was barley starting making beats. For him to tell me he fucks with my music and he keeps up with me really gave me the motivation to keep making music and sending it out.You never know. Shouts out sortahuman too he still supporting the music I make as an artist.

(LS) Thank you again for being apart of this great come up and is there any last things you’d like to mention to the viewers? And links you wanna add where they can check out your music or even contact you? Much love Kira!

(K) Viewers can keep up with me through my social media’s!

Instagram.com/fucckira

Twitter.com/fucckira

Also my Music Links:

SoundCloud.com/fucckira

Apple Music: https://music.apple.com/us/artist/fucckira/1485190577

Spotify:

https://open.spotify.com/artist/0brnKNJ2UDC6e4dAOXU6YN?si=mx245oXGTEO6WtaBlRLK3Q

Thank you for the opportunity to let y’all know a little bit about me and what my goals are looking like this year. I appreciate all the love and support. More music coming soon!

[thekingofgear]

Hey there! During the 1995 Jools Holland performances of The Bends and High and Dry, I noticed Jonnys distorted guitar sound is particularly focused and wirey. Perfect example, during the solo for high and dry of that performance. Why does his sound stand out so much during this performance? We know he’s using a shredmaster and a Tele plus. Is he perhaps still using a fender tube amp instead of the 85 for dirt? Maybe his use of a quarter instead of a pick adds attack to the solo?

When Jonny’s guitar sounds much clearer on a tv performance than it does in a massive stadium, or on a record, it has very little to do with his guitar setup.

Though blurry, this screenshot from Radiohead’s Jools Holland performance of High and Dry shows Jonny using both a blackface-reissue Fender Twin Reverb and a Fender Eighty-Five (youtube).

But first, to clear one thing up: Jonny has basically never used his Shredmaster with a Fender tube amp for distortion. For approximately the first year after Radiohead were signed, the Shredmaster was his main pedal and the Eighty-Five as his main amp. Even when Jonny did start using tube amps in 1993 (such as a Fender Twin Reverb and Mesa Boogie combo), it was only for clean playing. The Shredmaster continued to be used exclusively with the Eighty-Five.

A photo of Jim Warren at the FOH mixing desk during soundcheck before one of Radiohead’s October 2016 performances in Mexico city (avidblogs).

Usually, when you hear Radiohead, it’s either on a studio recording or in a music venue. Even when reverb isn’t used as an “effect” on recordings, there’s basically always reverb added during the mixing stage to make the instruments sound more natural and blend well together. In contrast, Jim Warren (the band’s FOH engineer since the early-90s) rarely adds heavy reverb to the mix at live performances. Since Radiohead basically always play in large venues with a lot of natural reverberation, the venue itself adds all of the natural blending that the band needs (this is a big part of why direct soundboard recordings of Radiohead’s shows sound significantly more dry than album recordings). Jonny’s amps are close-mic’d for both recording and live performance, and in both cases his guitar would sound extremely dry if you just heard the sound picked up by the microphone on its own. But in both cases reverb is being added later to make his guitar sound more natural, which is why many people (citation needed) think Jonny uses reverb effects live more than he actually does.

When Radiohead perform for a television program, they generally play with the same setup that they use for live performances, but they don’t have the natural reverberation of a large venue to smooth out their sound. Just like on studio recordings, this means they need to add reverb. But whose job is it to add that reverb? In recent years, the band have been lucky enough to have the power to bring their own producers or mix engineers with them for televised performances if they want to. But back in the mid-90s, you can be sure that the producers of Jools Holland (and any other shows the band performed on) had total control over how the band were mixed for broadcast.

Jonny uses reverb infrequently-enough in live performance that it was one of the few pedals he didn’t bring along for Radiohead’s 2010 Haiti Benefit show. The odd rectangle of velcro near the center of the pedalboard is where Jonny normally keeps his reverb pedal…

Perhaps in order to make the songs sound a little clearer through television speakers, the mix engineer for Jools Holland probably just added less reverb and mixed Jonny’s guitar louder than John Leckie did on the studio recording. Or perhaps the mix engineer didn’t know the band very well, and mixed the ”lead guitar” much louder than the other two. The mix of The Bends is much less of a “wall of sound” than on the album version, but that means you’d be able to hear Thom and Jonny clearly through bad-quality television speakers. Also, note that the bass is much quieter than on the studio recording (not just the bass guitar, but the bass frequencies for the whole band). That seems to be a common mixing technique for television. Official recordings of live performances from throughout the 90s capture the “wall of sound” a lot better than the Jools Holland televised recording. A lot of the gear at the Glastonbury 1997 performance is different from the Astoria 1994 performance, but the two still sound closer to each other than to the Jools Holland recording.

So when Jonny’s guitar sounds much clearer on a tv performance than it does in a massive stadium, or on a record, it has very little to do with his setup. He may be playing the same song with the same gear, but it’s the engineers who ultimately determine how he sounds and what you hear. This is also a big part of why why Jonny’s TelePlus->Shredmaster->EightyFive setup sounds different on The Bends (produced by John Leckie) compared to OK Computer (produced by Nigel Godrich).

A screenshot of Jonny “bowing” the low-E string of his Telecaster Plus with a coin during the Jools Holland performance of High and Dry (youtube).

[emoboijk]

MYG | Lo-Fi Beats (06)

Lo-Fi: an aesthetic of recorded music in which the sound quality is lower than the usual contemporary standards so that imperfections of the recording and production are audible.—fluff, angst, idol!au

prologue :: 01 :: 02 :: 03 :: 04 :: 05 :: 06 :: epilogue

1,835 words

p.cred

You’re staring wide-eyed and open-mouthed at Minji, her expression serious now that she’s fully explained that Daniel Ito is, in fact, completely full of shit . She smirks slightly and you can tell that she’s impressed with herself, “You have to come back.”

There’s a flicker of hope in your chest, your heart racing at the prospect. It almost makes you want to cry, how much you’ve missed your old job and friends. How much you’ve missed Yoongi; like missing a piece of yourself.

You say what you’re thinking, “Would he take me back?”

There’s an assumption in the question; an assumption about what Yoongi means to you and what you mean to him. For the first time, you don’t care. The carefully crafted boundaries you’d constructed around your relationship with him have evaporated, because if you go back now...you won’t risk being anything other than the person he was meant to be with.

You look up when Minji doesn’t respond, and you can see she doesn’t know what to say. Before your speech all those weeks ago, the answer would’ve been a definite: yes . But now it’s uncertain. He still cares for you, of course; you can’t erase that kind of connection and dependency so quickly. But could he forgive you? Would things ever be the same? There was no way to know the answer to those questions except to go back.

“I don’t know,” she sighs eventually, “but isn’t it worth the risk?”

And that question you definitely know the answer to.  

“Grandma,” you say, ten minutes later, bursting through the front door with Minji at your heels, kicking off your shoes wildly in the entrance. Your grandmother peeks her head out of the kitchen curiously and you say, “I’m leaving!”

You speed past her into your room and hear Minji introduce herself, your grandmother cooing, “I’ve heard so much about you!” And, even though she doesn’t mean for you to, you hear her whisper, “She’s finally leaving!” You know she means it in the best way.

You throw what little belongings you have into your suitcase and reemerge, Minji and your grandmother still chatting by the front door. Your grandmother looks at you knowingly and you smile, pulling her in for an awkward one armed hug. You press a kiss to her cheek and whisper, “I love you.”

She squeezes your shoulder and says, “I’ll see you. Have a good trip.”

You buy two last minute tickets for a train going to Seoul, rushing across the station to make it on time, and squeezing into your seats side by side, your shoulder pressed against the window.

“You know what you’re going to say?” Minji wonders.

“No,” you sigh, leaning your forehead against the glass, unable to picture anything but Yoongi’s expression the day you told him to leave you alone.

“It has to be tonight,” she whispers meekly.

“ What ?” you nearly screech, startling the elderly woman across from you both, who had been napping. She grumbles, glares at you and your bow of apology, and then falls back to sleep.

“They have their dome concert in Seoul tonight,” she glances at her watch, “right now, actually. Then they leave for Japan for two weeks…”

You put your head in your hands, “I can’t wait two weeks.”

“So, it has to be tonight,” she concludes, drumming her fingers on her thighs nervously.

“Why didn’t you come get me earlier?” you grumble.

“Uh, I have my own life?” she smirks, nudging you with her shoulder playfully.

“ Fine ,” you smile, “I guess I better get to thinking.”

By the time you get to Seoul nearly two hours later, you’re no closer to a speech. You don’t even have an opening line. Nothing seems good enough. Even you wouldn’t take yourself back at this point. But as the train pulls into the station, you can’t obsess about it anymore. Minji checks her watch and curses under her breath, the ahjumma from earlier glaring as she takes her bags off the overhead rack. You watch Minji, feeling panicky suddenly, “What is it?”

“The concert’s almost over,” she pulls you up from your seat and you barely have time to get your bags as she starts dragging you off the train. When you land on the platform, Minji goes on her tippy-toes in search of something, gasping when she sees a hand waving in the air. “Jihoon!” she yells, waving erratically as she begins pulling you again. You’re surprised your arm is still in its socket.

“Jihoon,” you grin when you see him, looking frantic as he shakes his car keys around. He doesn’t look at you and instead turns to face Minji.

“You’re late!” he exclaims.

“It was a long talk,” Minji rolls her eyes.

When Jihoon finally turns to look at you he’s glaring. You frown, guilt flooding your chest again. You bow to him and whisper, “Sorry, sunbaenim.”

“Damn right,” he chuckles, pulling you in for a tight hug before gripping your wrist and taking you with Minji to the parking lot, “We’re late! We have to catch them before they leave the venue!”

Jihoon drives like a madman. For all his OCD in the office, he’s chaos on the streets; swerving and speeding and braking suddenly. Minji holds tight to her chair, arms stiff from fear as she grumbles, “What is this, Fast and Furious ?”

“Do you want to get there or not?” he says, pressing his foot down on the gas.

By the time you get there your heart is hammering so fast it might burst, and while Minji and Jihoon are running full speed past security guards (waving their badges frantically) and down the back of the concert venue, everything feels hazy. Your doubts are the only things in your head, huddling together and blacking out all common sense.

When they stop abruptly outside the dressing rooms you nearly crash into them both, chewing on your bottom lip apprehensively.

“Minji…” you whisper, gripping her arm like she’s a life raft, “I don’t know about this…”

“ Come on ,” she urges, taking your hand and pulling you through the crowd of employees and toward the dressing rooms, “The concert is over,” she stands on her tiptoes to try and catch sight of them, “They should be here by now.”

“Couldn’t this have waited?” you ask, but you don’t look at her. Like second nature your eyes scan the surrounding area for him, “Tomorrow morning—” you pause as your heart restarts.

“I told you, they leave for—” she stops, too, when she sees him (all seven of them, plus an entourage, including Daniel Ito). You can’t take your eyes off him. Min Yoongi.

Exhaustion is painted on his face like a tattoo and sits on his shoulders like a heavy winter coat, like protection. You can’t help feeling that you shouldn’t be here. He’s the first to notice you and Minji, huddled together in their path, as if he has a sixth sense for it. He stops dead in his tracks, the boys noticing his pause and stopping too, before suddenly the whole hallway is frozen. But you can’t take your eyes off him.

“Yoongi, I—” you start and are grateful when someone cuts you off. Do you have an excuse? A good one?

Daniel’s voice is like steel against your name. “What are you doing here?” he says, the words tight in his throat.

“ You ,” Jihoon’s voice is serious and unwavering, “You sir, are full of crap!” He steps forward from behind you, pointing a finger accusatorially at Daniel.

Minji, standing at your elbow, adds, “Yeah! Mr. Empty-Threats!”

“Good one,” you mutter, but it’s half-hearted. You haven’t looked away from Yoongi. It’s been three months and he’s so beautiful. And you have so many questions. All the things you miss about him sting so much more now that he’s in front of you.

He doesn’t make eye contact. At first, he watched the floor. But now that Jihoon and Minji have started lobbing insults and hurling accusations he’s looked up at Daniel and the others. But his eyes still avoid you.

You’re consumed with your thoughts, with your mental catalogue of Yoongi (his hair is sticky with sweat and darker now, the purple blotches beneath his eyes tell you he hasn’t slept in at least 36 hours, you can see the sharp definition of his cheekbones so you figure he hasn’t been eating, his hands are shaky so you know he’s been having trouble writing…), but in the background everyone’s fighting. Jihoon and Minji are shouting explanations to the staff and the members, while Daniel demands that you and they be removed.

You’re crying without realizing because, along with all the signs of his unhappiness, he looks so confused . And you’re terrified that you won’t be able to come back from this. You burned a bridge when you left. You broke his heart and your own. And even when he learns that you were manipulated and blackmailed...will he ever be able to dissociate that lie from who you really are?

You think back to the night on his front porch so many years ago...That boy and all of the beautiful things he said, the lo-fi beats in his headphones, the kimchi on his breath. You have to believe that that boy would never give up on you.

Your voice is soft and tear-soaked, but it cuts through the noise, “I’m so sorry.” And then, finally , he’s looking at you.

You step toward him, almost close enough to touch but you aren’t that brave yet. “I’m so sorry,” you say again, “I didn’t mean any of it. Of course, we’re more ,” you pause, looking him in the eye, tasting fear on your tongue, “I hope we’re more.”

He’s a foot away from you and you feel the distance so sharply that it might as well have been an object separating you both. His eyes are sharp and serious, calculating; it’s his editing face, cold and critical. He says your name, half a warning and half a plea.

“Yoongi,” you whisper desperately.

And you’re not sure what shifts, or what part of him inside snaps, but he closes the distance between you, takes your face in his hands, and presses his lips to yours like there’s no other place they should be. You’re caught up in it all, your arms wrapping around him, his emotions and yours flowing through you both like an electric spark.

One thought pierces through it all: he’s a better kisser now. He knows what to do with his tongue. He tastes like cherry chapstick and sweat, and his tongue licks your bottom lip until you concede. It lights a fire in the pit of your stomach and sets your nerves alight.

The only thing that hasn’t changed is the emotion behind it. You can feel it clear as day, just like the last time, he loves you.

author’s note—feels rushed?

epilogue ↝

for more of my works check out my m.list

[hoyoungy]

Tied | Seungcheol (1/2)

genre: angst, comedy, fluff | best friend!seungcheol x fem!reader summary: you made a deal with your best friend that if you were both single by 30, you would marry each other. what’s better than marrying your best friend as a desperate attempt to prove that you had your life together? but when you kiss him and start to fall for him, you find it hard to get back up word count: 4848 a/n: a two-shot with the most gorgeous man alive. it was originally just going to be a one-shot, but then it exceeded a lot of words.... warnings include mentions of alcohol and cheating

part 2

“Why is dating so hard!?”

It was 9:30 on a warm Saturday evening when you burst through Seungcheol’s apartment door uninvited. He sat comfortably on the kitchen table as he studied, undisturbed by your breaking and entering as he was already used to it after a couple of years.

“Hello to you, too,” he muttered, not taking his eyes off of his textbook. “You’re back from your date quite early.”

“Oh, my God, he was so boring! All he talked about were video games and-and developing them and said so many big words that I didn’t understand… And he had the audacity to ask me to come back home with him!”

You invited yourself to some snacks and a drink from his kitchen as you rambled on about how horrible your date was. Seungcheol finally looked up from his studying so he could watch you make yourself comfortable in amusement. Watching you binge on all of his junk food was always something he never got tired of.

“You’re telling me talking about games didn’t make you want to just rip your clothes off?” he teased. “A bit picky, aren’t you?”

“You’re one to talk! Didn’t you reject a date because her fingers weren’t pretty?”

“They were dirty, dry, and her cuticles were flaking. It’s basic hygiene, _____! If she couldn’t even take care of her hands, who knows what else she neglects!”

“Fine, so we both have impossibly high standards, but it’s because both you and I are too good for anyone.”

“At least we can both agree on that.”

“How long have you been studying?”

“Since four.”

“What!?” Upon hearing that, you jumped up from your slumped state and pulled two bottles from his fridge. “Alright, time for a study break, my friend.”

“I can’t, I have a midterm on Monday -”

“You always overwork yourself, ‘Cheol. Take a break and talk with your best friend once in a while, will ya? You know, your brain retains information better if you take breaks.”

“Oh, yeah? Does the alcohol help with that?”

“No, it’s your incentive - a completely separate element.” You handed Seungcheol a bottle before closing all of his textsbooks for him. He sighed loudly, fully knowing he couldn’t fight you. But he took the bottle graciously with his cute, cheeky smile that you loved so much. You two clinked your bottles together to begin his break.

“It’s been a while since you and I have just hung out together,” he noted to you.

“Yeah, guess whose fault is that?”

“Don’t use that tone with me, missy. I’m sorry I can’t help that our midterm schedules conflict with each other.”

“You know that’s not what I meant.”

The real reason you and Seungcheol haven’t spent time together recently was because he occupied nearly all of his free time to his new girlfriend. They’ve only been dating for about two months, but they never leave each other’s side! When you wanted to eat lunch with him, she was there; when you called him on the phone, she would always answer; and when you asked him to pick you up after a night out, she was the one driving.

At first you thought it was because she was jealous of how close you two were, but it was the opposite. When Seungcheol told you it was because she was kissing up to you and wanted The Best Friend Approval, you almost didn’t believe it because it sounded completely ridiculous. Needless to say, she was already off to a bad start, considering it’s been two months since you and him had more than two minutes of alone time together.

“I’m surprised she’s not sitting on your lap as you study.”

“Ha ha… I told her to stay home tonight because I can’t focus when she’s around.”

“Ugh, I don’t want to know the reason why,” you groaned. “At least she finally gave you some breathing room after two months.”

“If you don’t like her ~” he trailed off, hinting he could end it with her any moment.

“No, no… She’s tolerable… And she makes you happy, so I guess she can get half of a point from me.”

“So generous of you,” he quipped, kicking you from under the table.

“Just because I’m lonely and unlovable doesn’t mean you should have to suffer like me.”

“Aw, don’t talk about yourself like that!” Seungcheol scoots his chair over to you and pulls you into a good ol’ knuckle sandwhich. “You’re not lonely and unlovable! You have me, and your Mom loves you.”

“Good one, Cheolie.”

“Wow, you haven’t called me Cheolie since freshman year. Are you drunk already or do you miss me that much?”

“No. I’m just feeling nostalgic, that’s all.”

“Sure you are.”

You and Seungcheol spent the rest of the night drinking whatever alcohol he had left in his apartment. It wasn’t much, but it was enough that you felt tipsy. The two of you used to spend countless nights just hanging out and talking with a drink or two all of the time in your early years of college, but as graduation was approaching, those nights became less frequent, and even more less frequently now that he has a girlfriend. So tonight, you were going to cherish this time you had with Seungcheol.

“I’m going to die alone,” you cried dramatically as you laid your head down on his kitchen table. The past couple of hours, you and him were just talking about the old times and past relationships and Seungcheol just had to remind you about that you haven’t been in a committed relationship for three years now and that you’ve only been coasting through the dating scene.

“No, you won’t. You might just… get married really late?”

“I bet by then I won’t be able to have children.”

“Don’t talk like that about yourself, _____. Do you remember how long I was single for before I met Yunah?"

"Twenty three years."

"Exactly! Your three years doesn't even compare to my twenty three. Besides, I bet the guy out there that was meant for you will be worth the long wait. He'll have to get through me first, though."

"But what if it's taking me so long because no one wants me?" you pouted, taking another swig at your drink.

"Hey," Seungcheol nudged you to look at him. When you lifted your head, he had his arms out wide open, telling you to come in for a hug. You slowly scooted your chair towards him and laid your head on his shoulder lazily as he rubbed your shoulder assuringly. "Anyone would be crazy not to want you. You're an amazing friend, and I bet even a more amazing partner."

"You're the only man in my life that likes me, can you believe that?"

"Unsurprisingly, I can."

"Honestly, I don't think I'll ever find someone who will like me for who I am more than you."

"You better, or else you'll actually never marry."

As you both sat in silence, your thoughts flashed through many moments you've shared with Seungcheol. You two have watched each other grow up over the years and you knew each other like you knew the backs of your hands and that included Seungcheol knowing how badly you wanted to get married. You used to talk to him about your infinite Pinterest boards about cakes, dresses, and venues and how you wanted him to be your Man of Honor, and all of the details in between.

Seungcheol never asked you about what kind of man you wanted to marry. He knew your type, or at least the superficial parts of it, but never what you looked for in a husband and to be quite honest, you've never thought about it, either. At least until now. Sitting next to your best friend, a bit intoxicated, and emotionally thinking about the inevitability of your relationship status got you thinking.

What kind of man did you want to marry?

Well, he had to be handsome, of course. And a good sense of humor was always a requirement. Intelligent, kind, and playful were all necessary, too. You wanted to marry someone who would support you no matter what and would only build up your confidence, never tearing it down one bit. You wanted to grow together, even if it meant falling down a couple of times. They sound like the basic elements of a husband, but for some reason, you could never find all of those qualities in a single man.

Except Seungcheol.

Well, besides the fact that he was handsome… Seungcheol was average on a good day.

“Cheol-ster,” you slurred as you struggled to sit up properly to face him. You hadn’t had the chance to get a good look at his face the past few hours, but you now noticed how red his cheeks were. You forgot he turned red easily when he drank. “Let’s make a deal.”

“Ok.”

“You don’t even know the deal yet…”

“Doesn’t matter.”

“What if I asked you to marry me, you’d still agree?”

“Very funny.” He stared at you for a solid ten seconds to realize you weren’t kidding. “Oh, my God, you’re serious. _____, I have a girlfriend -”

“Not now, you idiot!” you scolded, hitting his arm. “I mean later. Like, way later. Like if we’re both single by thirty-something, both hate dating people like five years younger than us, both hate our lives, and just want to settle down with a dog or two or three.”

“Marry each other as a desperate attempt at life?”

“Yes!”

“How romantic…”

“But think about it! Think of all the benefits that come with being married to each other. We already know what we’re like around each other, I practically live with you already so we got that situation out of the way, we can be each other’s emergency contacts - there’s no downside to this!”

“We might as well be celibate.”

“Oh, shit,” you cursed. You forgot about the whole sex part when it came to marriage… “Ok, so there’s one downside, but don’t the pros outweight the cons!?”

“Why are you like this all of a sudden?”

“Because now that you finally have a girlfriend, I can see how you are around her and it makes me jealous in a way that I miss having that, you know? You’re the one person who knows how much I want to get married. I just want to secure something because at this rate, I really will be single my entire life.”

“So I’m your last resort?” he pouted.

“Oh, come on, don’t act like that! You know I’d love to get married to my best friend!”

You gave Seungcheol the puppy eyes that he could never say no to. Even when drinking, he knew that this wasn’t the brightest idea ever, but how could he turn your lonely self down like that?

“… Fine.” He covered his ears instinctively when he heard you screech with joy. “But I’ll only agree if you agree on three simple conditions.”

“Shoot.”

“One, this is if and only if we are both single by thirty.”

“Deal.”

“Two, if I cook, you have to do the dishes.”

“You’re pushing it, but that’s completely fair, I get it.”

“And three, I get to rap at our wedding.”

“No, absolutely not.”

“It’s all or nothing, _____.”

“I refuse to let you rap your vows to me.”

“Take it or leave it,” he threatened.

You couldn’t believe that this was his ultimatum to you, but he was just as serious as you were about his whole ordeal.

“Ugh, fine!” you groaned, caving in. “I hate you.”

“Don’t hate me too much, you might have to deal with me for the rest of your life.”

“I have reached a new low.”

As a silent agreement, Seungcheol raised his almost-empty bottle to you. You clinked yours against his begrudgingly and chugged whatever was left in your bottle.

“Cheers to the next seven years. Let’s see where life takes us,” Seungcheol said.

“Seungcheol, I need your help! It’s an emergency!” you panicked when you opened the door to his place.

His eyes were glued to the TV screen when he gave you a nod of acknowledgment. You sat beside him on the couch and watch him vigorously play a game of Fornite with his headset on.

“I’m half-listening,” he said.

“This is going to sound ridiculous, but I need you to pretend to be my boyfriend.”

“What!?” Seungcheol was so shocked by your proposal that the one second he looked away from the TV to look at you, his character died instantly.

“Hear me out before you say no! So you know my cousin’s getting married, right? He’s making me the only person in the family who is unmarried and single and I cannot face my entire family unless I bring a date.”

“Why can’t you ask Jeonghan, or something?” he asked, starting up a new game.

“See, that’s where this gets difficult…” you smiled sheepishly. “Don’t hate me, but I kind of have been pretending you were my boyfriend for a whole year now…”

“What!?” Oops, he died again. “A whole year!? Why didn’t you tell me!?”

“Because I was hoping I’d have a boyfriend to bring to the wedding by now and then I could lie and say that you broke up with me!”

“Unbelievable… You are hopeless.”

“I know, that’s why I need you to pretend with me! Please ~! They think I’m lying! Well, I mean I am, but I want to prove myself to them for once, you know? Think of it as practice for when we turn thirty!” You begged again, using your famous puppy eyes that you’ve been using to your advantage way too frequently lately.

Seungcheol groaned loudly, throwing his head back in defeat. “You owe me big time. Like a three-course meal once a week big time.”

“Yeah, totally, whatever you want!” You lunged at your best friend and gave him the tightest hug. “Ah, you’re the best!”

“So when’s the wedding?”

“… This Sunday.”

“What the hell, _____, that’s in like three days!”

“Sorry! I completely forgot about it until my Mom texted me an hour ago!”

“You’re so lucky my anniversary is the day before.”

“Oh, yeah, I forgot you have another woman in your life that isn’t me,” you snorted. “How long have you two been dating now?”

“Six months.”

“Ugh, it feels like it’s been three years.”

“Don’t be like that. Now leave, she’s coming over in an hour and I haven’t seen her all week.”

“Wear protection, my friend,” you said as you ruffled his hair playfully. “Try to look decent on Sunday.”

“Same to you.”

Normally, you don’t care much to impress your family with the way you look or how you carry yourself. But tonight was a big deal for you. Being one of the youngest in the family, it was natural that you would be one of the last ones to get married, but when you found out your youngercousin, who has been with his fiancé for nearly four years now, was getting married before you, you decided to get your shit together and show your family that you were totally capable of maintaining a relationship.

You stumbled outside of Seungcheol’s apartment struggling to walk in your heels. After knocking vigorously on the door, Yunah opened it up for you with a bright, fake smile.

“_____!” she squealed, pulling you into an awkward hug. “You look so pretty!”

“Ah, hey, Yunah! Thanks, you too, as usual.”

“Oh, stop it ~ Come on in, Seungie’s almost ready.” You cringed at her nickname for him when she turned around and went back inside.

“Thanks for letting me borrow him. I don’t know what I would do if I showed up to a wedding without a date,” you sighed.

“It’s no problem at all! I always feel bad that I take him away from you so often. He needs to spend time with you once in a while.”

“I’m not a child,” Seungcheol said as he walked out of his room straigtening his tie. “You guys act like I’m the son of divorced parents…”

You gawked at your best friend as he walked towards the two of you. He wore all black, from head to toe, and even fixed his messy, fluffy hair a little bit. He looked like he was ready to walk the red carpet, and you’ve never seen your best friend look so stunning before.

“Hello?” he called, snapping his fingers in front of your face. “Earth to _____.”

“Huh? Oh, hey…!”

“I know, I look sexy in all-black, huh?”

“You look presentable,” you lied.

“Don’t listen to her, you look very handsome ~” Yunah gushed before she pulled Seungcheol in for a deep kiss.

The scene in front of you made you want to throw up and throw yourself down the stairs. This wasn’t the first time you’ve seen them kiss, but it gets worse the more you witness it. “Ugh, gross…”

“Ok, let’s get going. I want to make it there before the open bar closes.” Seungcheol gives Yunah one last parting kiss before you both leave his apartment.

“You look dashing tonight,” he teased. “I haven’t seen you in a dress like this since freshman homecoming.”

“You know I hate wearing dresses like this. I’m only wearing it because I need to look like an adult with her life together in front of my family.”

“Good thing I’m here then. I’ll be your personal hypeman.”

“I should rent you out to bring to family functions more often.”

“That’s a large price to pay.”

The two of you arrived at the wedding around the same time as everyone else did and the venue was packed. Half of it was full of aunts, uncles, and cousins from across the world that you haven’t seen since you were a little girl and the other half was the fiancé’s side of the family. There had to be at least three hundred people here.

On top of that, all of the decorations were so beautiful and detailed. Your cousin had the type of chairs you wanted for your wedding, large center pieces at each table, and hundreds of twinkling lights hanging from the ceiling. The inner desperate and younger you was squealing at all of the wedding galore.

It only reminded you of how alone you really were.

“Quick, to the bar,” you guided, taking Seungcheol by the wrist.

“We don’t even know where we’re sitting yet!”

After getting a couple of drinks for each of you, you wanted to sit at your table as quickly as you could. Maybe the reception would move faster that way. Your seats were located near the dancefloor and the bridal party’s tables, right where your parents and a few other cousins sat.

“You didn’t tell me I was meeting your parents!” Seungcheol hissed to you.

“Did you think they weren’t going to be here!?”

“I don’t know, I didn’t prepare anything! We didn’t prepare anything!”

“We’ll be fine! It’s not like you don’t know anything about me!” You plastered on the biggest smile on your face when your parents got up to hug you. “Hi, Mom, Dad.”

“_____, I’m so happy you came! And with Seungcheol, too! We’re so happy to finally meet you!” In her ecstatic state, your Mom hugged Seungcheol even tighter than how Yunah does.

“Nice to meet you both,” Seungcheol said, clearly nervous from the way your Dad eyed him suspiciously.

“I can’t believe he’s real!” One of your cousins snorted. “And he’s hot!”

“Hey!” you scolded.

“No offense, but we all thought you were fake.”

“Yeah, she warned me about that.”

Throughout most of the dinner, you were so nervous that you were almost sweating. A situation like this wasn’t even serious, even if Seungcheol were to slip up, but the wedding atmosphere just really made you anxious. The drinks only helped a little bit. It was mostly your parents who asked the two of you questions about your relationship. They asked basic things, like how he asked you out, what was your first date like, does Seungcheol wear condoms - you know, basic things…

But as dinner moved forward, you started to relax a bit. Seungcheol was answering all of the questions quite impressively and it made this whole fake boyfriend thing look very much believable. You were surprised with his acting skills - who knew Seungcheol would make a great boyfriend?

“Tell me, Seungcheol,” your Dad began. Oh no, this sounded like it was going to be one of those Dad questions… “What do you like about our daughter?”

“Dad!” you hissed.

“C’mon, can’t her family wonder what this boy thinks about our precious daughter?”

“You’re so embarrassing!”

“Yeah, Seungcheol. Tell us all what you see in this little brat,” your cousin teased.

“What do I like about her?” Seungcheol repeated.

You slowly shrunk in your chair. This was it, this was how your whole family was going to find out about your fake boyfriend and how you’ll be single forever…

“When we first met, she was the closed-off girl on our residence floor. She always hung out in her dorm, and when she wasn’t, she was in the community room in the corner couch with her headphones in. When the rest of our floor was out having fun at parties, she would finally prop the door open to her dorm room and blast her music. One time, I stayed back because I had an exam the Monday after and I just talked to her the whole night. At first, we made it a weekly thing to hang out, but it gradually become more frequent. During those times, I’ve gotten to know her a lot more. She was cold, but she opened up her heart to me so easily. We were friends for a long time before we started dating, so I came to her for anything and everything and she came to me, and it was all the more reason to like her. In those past four years, I’ve seen her be kind, intelligent, gentle, angry, sad, frustrated… I’ve seen it all at this point, but it’s part of the infinite reasons why I love her. And even after all of that, I still can’t take my eyes off of her.”

Throughout his whole speech, you looked at Seungcheol with wide eyes. You couldn’t stop staring at him even when he finished. You thought that he was going to tell them a fake story about how you met at a coffee shop or something, but he told them a story full of truth, one that you kept in your heart. The day you met Seungcheol was when your life changed for the better and hearing him repeat it back to your family in a way that made your heart flutter brought tears to your eyes.

And to your Mother’s…

“And you two have only been dating for a year?” your cousin asked. “It feels like you guys have been married for ten years.”

“Oh boy, you made her mother cry!” your Dad chuckled as he teased your Mom. “That story deserves a drink. Let me buy you one.”

“Thanks.” Seungcheol shot you a quick wink before he got up to go with your Dad to the bar.

“I like him,” your Mother smiled as she gently wiped her tears. “I like him a lot!”

“Clearly. I think you and Dad like him more than I do.”

“Even better!”

The rest of the night went on extremely smoothly, which made you even more anxious than before. It was probably because you couldn’t take your mind off of what Seungcheol said about you to your parents. You spent your college years with him mostly teasing each other and only ever said sincere words to each other when either of you was upset or really needed to hear some sort of validation. Maybe it was the wedding fever, but the whole night, you thought about how much you really appreciated Seungcheol and how Yunah was so lucky to have him.

The wedding fever hit it’s high point when your cousin and his now-wife danced alone together on the dancefloor. You could hear a collective, longing sigh throughout the venue from all of the ladies in the room, you included. The dancefloor opened up to the whole room once the lovely couple finished their first dance, and you and Seungcheol were the only ones left at the table.

“How am I doing so far?” he asked.

“You’re way too good at this for someone who has only been in a relationship for six months.”

“Yeah, I had some practice with Yunah’s parents not too long ago, so this was a piece of cake.”

“I bet. Do her parents love you more than she does, too?”

“No, that’s not possible.”

As you sat in silence for a bit and admired the couples on the dancefloor, Seungcheol took this opportunity to look at you while you were distracted. The look on your face wasn’t necessarily sad, but it was something else - like you were longing for something. He hadn’t seen you like this since your last boyfriend broke up with you, and he remembered how devastated you were.

You looked at Seungcheol with a brow raised when he stood up.

“C’mon, let’s dance.”

“Dance? With you? No, thanks.”

“If I don’t force you to, your parents will.” Seungcheol nudged his head over to your parents on the dancefloor who ushered you to join them.

“Fine, but if you step on my feet, it’s over.”

The song was slow and gentle, muttering lyrics about how much the singer loved their partner. Seungcheol bowed to you embarrassingly before wrapped his arms around your waist. Hesitantly, you put your hands on his shoulders.

“This isn’t some awkward middle school dance,” he teased. “Don’t be afraid of me.”

With that said, he forced you to wrap your arms fully around his neck, forcing you to close the gap between the two of you. You two were so close that you could smell his cologne and shampoo. There was something that was pulling the two of you even closer together - like a magnet. So close that your noses were almost touching. You never noticed how long his eyelashes looked, how clear his skin was, and especially how soft his lips looked…

Oh no, this was bad, this was really bad! You can’t be thinking these things about him! And why now, of all times, when you’ve known him for four years! What was even worse was that he was looking at you and thinking the same things, too, and you knew it by the way you caught him staring at your lips.

What surprised you the most was that he was the one to lean in and kiss you. You returned the kiss immediately, shocked by how soft his lips were against yours. It was a short, simple kiss, but it was one that struck you in your core.

When he pulled away, he pressed his forehead against yours.

“What are we doing?”

The car ride home was a long and silent one. The air was tense and awkward and it was all your fault! If you just sucked up your pride and just went to the damn wedding alone, you wouldn’t be in this mess! You couldn’t believe you just ruined four whole years of friendship in one, desperate night -

“Hey,” Seungcheol said, shaking you from your thoughts. “I’m sorry about… you know, what happened back there when we were dancing…”

“No, it was my fault -”

“I should have kept my distance -”

“I should have set some boundaries -”

“It won’t happen again, you know -”

“It’d be best if we could just forget about all about it -”

“It was a mistake, and Yunah doesn’t have to know.”

“Yeah…” you breathed out. “A mistake.”

When he pulled up to your place, you were almost too scared to get out of the car. The minute you stepped out, your entire relationship with him was going to change, and that was the last thing you wanted. If you could rewind and prevent that kiss, you would in a heart beat, but for now, you wanted to stay in this moment forever so you wouldn’t lose your best friend.

“This won’t change anything, right…?” you whispered.

“Not unless we want it to,” he reassured. “We just have to pretend like it didn’t happen.”

“Yeah, you’re right. I’ll head on in now. Thanks again. Not just for tonight, but for everything.”

“_____, nothing’s going to change -”

“I know! I just don’t appreciate you as much as I should, you know?”

“You’re a great friend, too,” he said, ruffling your hair playfully. “You still wanna get married at thirty, right?”

“If that’s ok with you,” you smiled.

“Just making sure ~ Good night.”

“Text me when you get home.”

When you went inside your home, you went straight to bed, spending the entire night crying yourself to sleep.

[nocaptainreuben]

Countdown to YALC: The Electrical Venus by Julie Mayhew

It seems like it’s been about six years since I actually sat down to write a book review, what with how busy I’ve been lately, but I’m pleased to report that I’ve been reading like mad thanks to a very relaxing holiday in Mallorca. So, playing catch-up and casting it back to a book I was sent in April (I know, I know, I’m so slow, I’m sorry!), the first one I’m going to talk about is Julie Mayhew’s The Electrical Venus.

‘In a sideshow fair in eighteenth-century England, teenager Mim is struggling to find her worth as an act. Not white, but not black enough to be truly exotic, her pet parrot is a bigger draw than her. But Alex, the one-armed boxer boy, sees her differently. And she, too, feels newly interested in him. But then Dr Fox arrives with his ‘electrickery’ – feats of electrical magic – and he chooses Mim to play his ‘Electrical Venus’. Her sudden popularity means takings are up, slop is off the menu and this spark between her and Fox must surely be love. But is love worth more than a penny for an electrifying kiss?’

This book came along after I’d already decided to start saying no to review requests, but with the travelling circus theme and my been-to-see-it-five-times level of obsession with The Greatest Showman, how could I turn down something like this? I was really excited about the fantastical, magical, circus side of things being mixed with early science and technology, and the feminist element of a young woman taking an interest in this, and I thought this would be a truly unique book that would be right up my street. Unfortunately, I found myself slightly disappointed on the whole, because it just didn’t end up being everything I wanted it to be.

I don’t know why, but I didn’t realise quite how heavily romance would feature, and I think I was expecting quite a different story to the one I read. The plot was fine, but there just wasn’t a hell of a lot that really grabbed me, and as I’m not generally a big fan of standard hetero romances, I got quite tired of the ‘best friends who are both secretly in love with each other but don’t realise it’ trope, and found myself rolling my eyes and shouting ‘just shut up and get together already!’ On the whole it is pretty cute, and ties up nicely at the end, but without really interesting characters or something else to bulk it out, that kind of sweetness isn’t really enough to sell it for me. This is completely a personal issue, and I’m sure if you like that sort of thing in a book it will really work for you, but I just could have done without it.

I did like the subtle feminism of how Mim’s journey caused her to realise her worth without a man and gain her independence, so any resulting relationship was truly one of equals, but I didn’t like Sebastian at all and hated how much of him we had to suffer through for Mim to get to that point. In fact, not liking the characters in general was a big problem for me. Great, three-dimensional characters are a real selling point for me, and can often make a book that I wouldn’t usually read become an unexpected favourite, but on the flip side, this means that if I don’t like or connect with the characters at all, I can find it really hard to get into the story. In The Electrical Venus, I found Mim and Alex both pretty unlikeable, and discovered that I just didn’t really care what happened to any of them. The plot was just strong enough to keep me reading to the end, but I remained pretty lukewarm on the whole thing throughout, and I felt really disappointed that I didn’t have any emotional investment.

What probably didn’t help that point for me was the writing style. Quite early on in the book, our MC Mim says of her mentor: ‘It was one of those phrases of Hildy’s, one of many, that I needed to take away with me and think about for a moment, untangle all the words to work out what she meant’ and that kind of sums up how I felt about the book. It’s very old fashioned and formal – which gives it a wonderfully authentic Georgian feel and will probably be a huge asset if you’re a fan of quality historical fiction – but for me, I sometimes found it quite hard to properly understand what was being said on my first pass through a sentence, and that made it hard to love. The book also has a dual POV, alternating between Mim and Alex with each chapter, and is written in first person, with the idea that the chapter’s main character is talking to an animal and recounting the story in a one-sided conversation. This gives it a kind of unusual stream of consciousness feel, which is quite interesting, but again, is something I don’t really connect with all that well. All that meant that whilst the story was good, actually reading it on the page wasn’t the best experience for me. I was interested to find out from the information at the end of the book, that The Electrical Venus had first been a radio play, and I would be quite keen on listening to that as I think the story could work a lot better for me in that format. (Also, it starred Hannah John-Kamen and I’m madly in love with her. ;p)

I’m aware that all this has sounded quite negative, but I definitely didn’t dislike this book, it just wasn’t really the book for me. I applaud Julie Mayhew for following through with quite an unusual idea, and really hope that the book finds its audience elsewhere. I also want to say a huge well done to the creative/marketing teams behind this book who have done an amazing job putting together a really aesthetically pleasing book with a gorgeous cover, and interesting promo material which made it a dream to stage for bookstagram pictures. Thank you so much to Hot Key Books for sending me my copy and continuing to do great work. All in all, The Electrical Venus gets a middling three stars from me, but I’d love to hear your thoughts if you have a different opinion, so please do get in touch on twitter or Instagram for a chat. Also, the British Books Challenge is still going strong, and this book makes a perfect candidate for it, so head to Chelley’s blog if you’d like to find out more about getting involved.

[yierknives]

What are the best reasons to have a Bluetooth speaker for a party?

There’s absolutely no doubt that a great party deserves amazing music pumping out of awesome speakers. You’ve spent a lot of time curating the perfect playlist and preparing for the evening, so ironing out all of the small details to make sure the night goes off with a bang is critical. Whether you want chilled music for an intimate dinner party or you want to dance the night away with friends and strangers alike, playing the right music from quality party speakers can create an unforgettable experience.

What to look for in party speakers?

So you’re ready to put on the party of the year. But you’re not quite sure what speakers you need in order to get the job done. That is understandable because there are a ton of factors to take into account when picking out the best party speakers. How loud do they need to be? How big do they need to be? Do you need them to be Bluetooth connectable, or is wired okay?

Here we go over a few of the things you need to consider when picking out the best party speakers for your purpose.

Sound Quality

With sound quality, we’re referring to the mids and highs of the music and how clearly and distinctively a speaker is able to produce these sounds. If the sound quality is good then the mids and highs will be clear and flawless without any distortion at high volumes. This is important otherwise once your speaker goes above a certain volume, you’ll start hearing what resembles a “scratching noise” that’ll ruin your music.

If you’re new to frequency response ranges and do not know what mids and highs are, I will make it simple for you.

Highs: These are the high pitches or high-frequency sounds that are often produced by the soprano, violin, flute, etc.

Mids: These are the medium pitches or middle frequencies that are often produced by the viola, cello, alto, tenor, oboe, etc.

Lows: These are the low pitches or low (bass) frequencies that are often produced by the bass, bassoon, bass drum, baritone, etc.

So before buying a speaker, make sure to read some reviews to ensure that the speaker has good sound quality and will not distort when you turn the volume to max.

Portability

How often will you be throwing parties? Will you always be using the same venue? Unless you are planning on keeping your speakers in the same location for every party, you should consider how important a factor like portability is.

Moving heavy speakers around a couple of times a month or even a couple of times a year can become a huge hassle when throwing a party. Larger speakers take up extra space which may mean you need to make extra trips to get the rest of your supplies. But then again, you may need the power that larger speakers offer.

There are some fantastic portable party speakers that are a little bit smaller but still pack 1000-watts of power. If you’re going to be doing a lot of moving, consider the option of picking up a smaller speaker that has more power. The last thing you want is to set up your party and have all the guests invited only to find out your speakers aren’t going to fit into the space you’ve picked out. Smaller speakers mean more dance floor room.

Battery Life

We just mentioned that a hand full of the party speakers on this list do not run on battery so when it comes to the battery it is obviously important to check if the speaker actually has one. Checking whether that battery is a rechargeable battery is important. While the chances of getting a proper party speaker that runs on a non-rechargeable battery are very slim, I still make sure to check.

Batteries come in different sizes, and some can be extremely powerful while others are sadly very weak. Check how powerful the battery is and how long it will last on max volume. Bear in mind that the volume that you are playing music at will affect how long the battery lasts. Another thing that you should take note of in regards to the battery is that if the speaker has accessories such as lights, then it will use far more power than when only the music is playing.

This can actually have a dramatic effect on the battery-life. For example, the ION Audio Block Party Live, which is an amazing speaker, gets about 70 hours of playtime from a charge when the light dome is switched off, however, when you switch it on while playing music, you only get 6 hours of playtime. Take this into consideration when buying a party speaker.

Connectivity

If Bluetooth is important to you, then you’re in luck, because most speakers these days have the capability to be connected via Bluetooth. Bluetooth party speakers generally work on a battery and you will need to take into account the amount of battery life you want out of your speakers.

Ideally, you will be able to play your music for over 12 hours without needing to recharge them. That way you can keep the music going through the entire ordeal. However, wired speakers offer a little more convenience in the sense that you don’t need to worry about recharging at all.

The signal is generally stronger with wired speakers and you don’t need to worry about the signal cutting out in the middle of everyone’s favorite sing-along song. Smaller speakers tend to be better suited to have Bluetooth connectivity as the whole point of having smaller speakers is portability. A lot of this decision will come down to size, power, and capability for your party.

Durability

Have you ever been at a party and had drinks spill on valuable things? It happens, and many other things do too. How much rigorousness are you going to be putting your speakers through? If you’re throwing university frat ragers, then a set of speakers that can handle whatever is thrown at them may be necessary.

If you have a more sophisticated social circle, you may be able to get away with using speakers that are a little more fragile. Most portable Bluetooth speakers these days are made with waterproof capabilities and are fairly durable. Generally, you should be okay in most cases, but this is a factor you should keep in mind.

What to Consider when Buying a Party Speaker?

Your Budget

Yes, the mighty dollar rules. Ideally, we would all own a B&W Nautilus but that’s not the way the world works and everybody cannot spend 50k on a speaker. So when we buy speakers (or most stuff actually) we often look at our budget and then limit our options to what we can afford. Since we know how important it is to stick to your budget, we’ve added party speakers from a variety of price ranges to our list.

Party Size and Location

If you think about this logically then it is obvious that a person throwing a small house-party for 20 people would not have the same audio needs as a person who invited 100 guests. So consider the number of people you typically entertain before making a final purchase decision.

Hand in hand with this consider the location of your party, more specifically whether it will be held indoors or outdoors. Some speakers sound amazing indoors but once you take away the acoustic effects provided by four walls and the roof, the sound “falls flat”. If you are planning to host an outdoor party, buy a speaker that will excel in that environment.

It’s going to have to be powerful, and loud, and if you know that there will be water nearby, you’d also want it to be water-resistant or even fully waterproof. There are many speakers, like the DinDinModern, that are water-resistant, making them perfect for pool parties. Speakers rated IPX7 have no problem ending up inside the pool if the party picks up speed!

FAQs about party speakers

1. How can I test if my speakers are good? One great way to test the quality of your speakers is to begin by playing a sound or music through them quietly. Listen intently to the sound quality at a lower level before turning it up. If the quality and tone don’t sound great at a low and quiet level, then it’s likely that the speaker needs replacing. Also, make sure that your speakers are connected correctly, as your music is only as strong as the cables and signals that it flows through.

2. Can certain sounds damage speakers? Yes, absolutely. Playing music through the speakers that are turned up too loud can damage the speakers quite quickly. When you over-power low-frequency speakers, it’s the fastest way to permanently damage them. Very often damage happens over time and it can be hard to tell that your speakers are permanently altered until it’s too late. To care for your speakers, ensure that the volume is at the right levels and that the frequencies aren’t too overpowering to ultimately ruin the speaker.

3. What happens if speaker impedance is too low? All speakers have an impedance rating which showcases how difficult it is to power the speaker. The lower the impedance is on the speaker, the more efficiently music will be able to pass through the speaker. This is due to how easily the electrical signal can flow through it. However, if the impedance is too low on your speakers, it can result in a weak output and a low tone. Making sure you get appropriate resistors can help provide a solution for this problem, as they will dissipate one-fourth of the maximum power your amplifier can output.

4. How many watts do I need for my speakers? Usually, the higher the watts on your speakers, the better. Watts help provide cleaner and better sound, no matter which speaker you choose. However, 50 watts should be more than enough to enjoy listening to your speakers recreationally and professionally, in some cases. From there, small differences in power don’t make a noticeable change in the quality of the sound. You would have to go up 100 watts per channel before being able to really tell a difference.

5. How can you tell how powerful a speaker is? You’ll be able to tell how powerful the speaker is by looking at the watts. If you are only listening recreationally and need something to fill the space, 50 watts will be adequate. If you are playing music professionally or want something with more power, 200 watts is said to be plenty of power coming out of that speaker. To determine how many watts your speaker has, you should be able to look at the back of the speaker box or the manual. Once turned around, there should be a plate or sticker on your speaker listing the wattage, voltage, and amperage.

Conclusion

Don’t overthink your desire to play great music at your next party or gathering. Consider the size of the party, the location, and what you are trying to accomplish overall with the music as your friends and family arrive. And most importantly, don’t forget to have fun with your guests. Choose the best speaker that will help you to enjoy the night the most!

Any of our winning options are quality speakers that will serve you well, but selecting the perfect one is about your preferences and ideal price point.Want more recommendations for the best Bluetooth speaker ? Check out our guides to the DinDinModern.

Why choose DINDINMODERN?

We do the retail and wholesale business of authentic Bluetooth speakers. We hope to be your stable global supporter and partner. We are an enterprise integrating factory and trade, specializing in the design, manufacture and sales of high-quality Bluetooth speakers. We always make every effort to check the quality of each Bluetooth speaker.

[herselfportrait]

INTERVIEW: BONES

(This interview originally featured in Soundsphere Magazine)

If you haven’t heard of Bones, where have you been? This London-hailing duo are at the epicentre of a new surge of all-female music they like to call ‘Future Rock’, their music a livewire of confidence and irresistible mettle. Bones certainly have something to say, and they aren’t afraid to say it.

Having already taken their sound across the Atlantic, sweeping from state to state in the US and generating a fanbase that are besotted with their particular brand of magic, what is their attitude to success? “I don’t think we are by any means successful yet. All we are doing is what we love and when people start to respond to it, it’s frickin’ incredible to us. But honestly, I know this sounds so lame, it’s about being happy and enjoying what you do. I think we make our own measurement of success; as long as you’re reaching your own measurement of what success is and you’re happy then that’s all that matters.”

A question we often like to ask here at Soundsphere magazine is whether success is strictly location-centric. In the UK, there is a preconception embedded into our psyche that in order to be successful you have to go to London; as a result, the north’s strong musical identity is neglected as a destination and is only seen as a platform for reaching greater things. “Success is such a subjective thing. If all that you ever wanted was to play in a packed room every night and for people to hear your music, it doesn’t matter where you are because, you know, you could be playing in Cornwall every night in a fisherman’s pub and every night it could be rammed and you could get the energy you need from that. I think for myself being from London and Carmen being from all over the place, in some ways it’s harder coming from a big city where there’s so many people and so many bands and everyone’s successful, the measuring stick is a lot higher. You know, if you’re not selling out the big venues, I think these days you’ve got to take whatever joy you can because the music industry is so strange and so different to what it was. I think you can be anywhere to have success, it just depends on what you’re looking for. I think obviously in LA, there’s loads of opportunities and it’s full of unique, ridiculous people and if that’s what you’re looking for, that’s the version of success you’re going for, then definitely in places in LA you’re going to get that kind of more starry street vibe. Gone are the days when you’d “shoot for the stars” and want to become a huge superstar – a lot of the time that doesn’t make people very happy. You can get so much joy out of so many different versions of “doing well”. Sometimes going for the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow is a bit dangerous. Finding the joys in day to day is more important. We did a tour and some of the rooms were full and some of the rooms weren’t full, and for any of those people in the less full rooms, that success stands the same because those people bought our tickets and came to see us. It doesn’t matter how full it was. That made us feel successful: that anyone would want to pay to see us play.”

Soundsphere Magazine often works with young people from less fortunate backgrounds to help them to carve a path in the music industry. Bones told us about how your income doesn’t have to dictate your outcome when it comes to being creative: “You can do anything yourself. Whether it’s videos, whether it’s artwork, or what you wear on stage. Number one: you have to do it because you love it, because it’s tough and not simple anymore to be successful. You’ve got to really fucking love it. Number two: you don’t need money to make music videos, you don’t need money to make artwork. All of the programmes you can get yourself. You don’t necessarily even need to go into a studio. Don’t let things like money get in the way of creating. The best work comes from a struggle. Another thing: it’s easy to say but don’t focus on the end game. Make monthly plans, enjoy every moment: “Where do I want to be the next month? Where do I want to be the month after that?” and focus on the short-term goals rather than the long-term ones. Since the music industry is now so volatile, long-term goals can just set you up for disappointment. If it works out, great - but focus on things from day to day that make you really happy and make you enjoy being a musician.”

A question put forward to us from a member of Hull’s Make Noise group, a collective of women and non-binary people working to improve their visibility and safety on the music scene, was how important to Bones consider the visual aspect of their work? Undeniably, Bones have a rough-around-the-edges beauty that is as unapologetic as it is confident – but much more than that, they’re clever: everything is planned to the last detail for effect. Rosie said, “It matters hugely for us. I do all the artwork and work out what we wear and the two come hand in hand. The kind of music we were making gave birth to the visuals. I think for all artists - not just us - it’s important to support the music you’re making with visuals. In a world where people are mostly watching things on Youtube and if your music videos or artwork aren’t reflective of the music you’re producing you’re missing a trick. Everything has to fit into the world you’re creating, otherwise how do you expect other people to join it? Most of it is just a result of enjoying what we do, so it comes quite naturally.”

You’ll recall that the genre Bones like to adhere to self-described Future Rock. This is a heady concoction of classic rock instrumentals and voltaic electrics that between the two of them, would be a tall order to translate from studio to stage. We asked them if that was the case: “Taking our sound on tour was tricky at first. We always were a rock band and that’s the aesthetic we wanted to put across. We work with a producer called Filippo Cimatti and he does all the drums in the studio, so translating that live was the first challenge. We said we’re a rock and roll band from the future. Filippo is incredible at working out how our music will sound live and making sure all the bass is coming through. I can’t say that there are that many challenges aside from that because we’re self-contained. Until we’ve got a huge touring budget where we’re headlining and have two hours to set up our stuff, we’ve got to get there, plug in, and go. When we play live it’s all about making it as simple as possible. No matter how difficult you think it might be to translate your sound to a stage, there’s always a solution. And again, you don’t need money. The less money you have the more creatively you have to think.”

It goes without saying that any kind of team work in any field can be testing – even more so when the work is creative. How do Bones manage to maintain a good work ethic and stay on track? “We’ve set up an infrastructure that allows us to adapt for when things get difficult. We’re pretty chill. We work hard. There are things that we used to find challenging, but we’ve done it all. We’ve played to one person and we’ve played in places full of them; we’ve had no money and we’ve had a bit of money. We’re quite unfazed now. As long as you’ve got your goals in mind, many things can be overcome. Don’t get overwhelmed.” Leading on from that, we were interested in the personal dynamic between Rosie and Carmen themselves and what qualities they find appealing in each other that keeps that infrastructure solid. Rosie said: “I’m more creative in terms of visuals, whereas Carmen is better at actually making them happen. She’s like the man on the ground. Carmen is very technical as well as creative with song writing, knowing all the chords and how to put stuff in a different key. I know nothing about that. We’re a really good team; we have a lot of respect because both us can’t really do what the other does. We all kind of fill a different role.”

Bones are going places, there’s no doubt about it. What legacy do they hope to leave? “Our answer would first and foremost be to empower people. Kicking ass is a by-product of that. For us, it’s all about the little girls and boys coming up to us and saying they’re learning how to play guitar, and even grown men coming up to us and telling us they feel empowered. Music is such a brilliant thing, and if ours can give people a voice and make them feel like they’re not alone, I think that’s what we want to do. The reason why we want to get big (because we will do) is so that we can do that on a greater scale. We just want to make our shows as exciting as possible, not just in a shouty riot grrrl way, but so that we can be as good as we can be in our own right, regardless of typecasts. That, for us, would be success; that would be enough.”

[sftswigan]

Manchester garage punks, Tinfoils, George from the band tells us about their latest single, their money raising effort for BLMUK and how a game of pool completed the band...

Alright hope you’re doing well through this shit time.

Can you tell us who Tinfoils are and where did the name come from?

TINFOILS are a mardy northern bastard garage punk band based in Manchester. There's three of us, and we've all moved here from Yorkshire.

The name came from when I was on an X Files hype. Thought it was a good name for a band, so I just got the Facebook, Twitter and Instagram pages before we'd even done a rehearsal! I think it was before we even met Will. I just thought it was a good name, the other two agreed and we ran with it.

Sounds like you had confidence in this band early on then. How did you find Will and what has he brought to the band?

I don't know if I had loads of confidence in the band before we started really, I just thought the name was cool! We didn't really take it very seriously for a long time, took us about 6 months to bother looking for a gig. Was just an excuse to meet and get pissed up at first.

Me and Alex had known each other for a while, and went to a pub in Fallowfield. We were having a game of pool, when two blokes came up and asked if they could play doubles because no other tables were free. We agreed, and one of them turned out to be Will. After that they invited us to some flat party, and at about 6 in the morning on some unknown persons kitchen worktop he mentioned he played bass. We met up a couple of days later and the rest is history.

He's an amazing bassist, and his love for funk has a massive impact on every song I write. Tunes always come out sounding better once I show them to Will and Alex.

Love the bass lines in your songs, The Abyss, especially. Could’ve been a different story if you and Alex decided that was your last game of pool and just handed it to Will and his mate!

Like The Blinders, you also (and I think one or two others have followed suit) made the journey from Doncaster to Manchester. How much of a difference has that made to you and the band?

Definitely! All credit for that goes to our mate Breezy to be fair, he was the one who suggested doubles. He drops it in to conversation every time he's trying to convince us to come out.

Yeah I moved from Doncaster about 5 years ago, I do love it to bits but I wouldn't have been able to do half the stuff I wanted to if I'd stayed. Wouldn't have met Alex and Will, and probably wouldn't have ended up starting a band. There are some decent bands in Doncaster but a lot of it was indie stuff at the time, which I do like but not something I was interested in doing. The music scene in Manchester is amazing at the moment, there's so much music and it's all really different and interesting. Best place for music in the country at the moment I reckon.

Manchester is definitely a great place for music but I think the UK in general has a really good music scene at the moment with loads of good bands about! Though places like Manchester have some unreal venues and bands love playing there.

I wanna talk about your latest single ‘Spitting’ which was released during lockdown. Absolutely love that track! You went to Magic Garden to record it. What did recording it there bring to the song?

Cheers mate, we're really happy with it. I think it added a lot going to Magic Garden, Gavin's brilliant. First of all, it's just way higher quality than anything else we've put out, and I think it manages to sound a lot like we do live. Gavin also suggested we add some vocals in to middle 8 bit, which was originally just instrumental. I quickly wrote something down on a bit of scrap paper in a few minutes, and recorded it in one take, and that's the take in the final song. It's the whole "lap me up I'm stagnant water" bit. We'll hopefully get some more tunes recorded soon, would love another trip to the garden. The music video for the song is just clips of our time at the studio mixed in with some live clips, had a really good time there.

I hear quite a few bands speak highly of him and his influence on their time in his studio. He does seem to get great results.

You recently released some songs on bandcamp that were live demos if I remember correctly. Are they going onto Spotify at any point and also will you be recording any of these? Peeping Tom is probably one of my favourites of yours.

Yeah they're a load of demos we did at Dead Basic Studios last year, we thought it was a shame to have them just lying about. We decided to put them out and donate all the money from Bandcamp Day to BLMUK, every little helps doesn't it. They won't be going on Spotify, but I reckon we'll probably record a couple of them properly one day. Peeping Tom's a bit of a favourite, would love to get that recorded in a studio but there's a million tempo changes so I think it'd probably be tricky to nail down. Its one of my favourites to play live, especially when we're headlining and get the chance for a self-indulgent 10 minute jam with a big sing-a-long. The demos will stay on Bandcamp for the foreseeable, but I think we'll probably take them off at some point.

A great cause, did you manage to raise much? Some really good tracks on there would love to here them recorded like you say.

So what are the bands plans once lockdown is relaxed to a point bands and musicians to get out there and do proper stuff without fear again?

Yeah we raised about £60-70 I think? It was only for the day, when Bandcamp waived their fees. Props to Lewis from Dead Basic for recording and mixing them all.

First things first we need to get in for a rehearsal! I've written a load of new songs which I'm looking forward to working out, I think it'll be a lot of new tunes in the set list when we're back gigging. Hopefully reschedule our tour that had to be postponed, play some tunes, get some recording done, and go out and see some bands! Just got to hope it's not too far off.

That’s awesome! Excited about the new tunes and future recordings...and gigs again obviously.

Hopefully you can squeeze a rearranged gig for us on the tour!

You mentioned how highly you rate the Manchester scene. Which bands should people go and see once bands get to gig again?

There's a tonne of bands to go and see, to name a few: Loose Articles, Blanketman, The Early Mornings, Swine, Springfield Elementary, Giant Boys, The Red Stains, Cold Water Swimmers, and loads of others. There's a lot of different styles about but I do feel like there's a sort of coherent feeling between all the bands around here at the minute. It got to the point just before pandemic where no matter which venue or what day, if you turned up you'd probably see something amazing. Fingers crossed it all survives the lockdown!

There’s some good bands there, really like Springfield Elementary and Swine what I’ve heard of them and also Red Stains. I need to check the others out but we’re very lucky to have so many good bands about and more people these days that are very much into new music!

We’re gonna end the interview with some quick fun questions...

Favourite album/EP of this year?

I'm gonna go with either Zero Dollar Bill by Do Nothing, or The Non-Stop EP by Buzzard Buzzard Buzzard. Can't pick between them!

Also really looking forward to Fontaines DCs new album, and Idles, and The Blinders.

If Tinfoils could tour with any band alive or dead who would it be?

Would love to go on tour with Fontaines DC, Idles or Sleaford Mods. If I had to pick between them, at the moment probably Fontaines. Loving their last few singles, and Dogrel was banging.

Ah wait, Thee Oh Sees! Maybe Oh Sees actually. Any of the above would allow me to die happy.

Is there a song that at least one member isn’t keen on in the set but are outnumbered?

I don't really like The Royal Baby Machine that much, but the other two do.

Chinese food or Indian?

Indian

Lager or Real ale?

Ale, but more of a standard bitter to be honest. Not West Coast passionfruit and jasmine infused with lemongrass IPA stuff, it's rank and I don't get it. Give me a pint of John Smiths over that wank any day.

Festival you’d love to play?

Wouldn't turn down Glasto!

Last one...

Best live band you’ve seen?

Best live band I've seen is probably Idles.

Alex, our drummer says Cabbage at Night & Day was probably the best gig he’s been to recently

Thanks to George from Tinfoils for chatting to us! You can listen to their music on all the streaming services and go and visit their social media pages. Here is their latest effor, Spitting.

[lauraramargosian]

Positive Celebrity Exclusive: Wentworth Con 2019 was a complete success!

Positive Celebrity Exclusive: Kiana Clark, Danielle Cormack, Celia Ireland, and Libby Tanner answer our questions!

The best Australian tv-shows of all-time has a mile-long list. Regardless, it’s safe to say the Wentworth tv show has safely earned its place in the top ten. 

Even earning itself a better score than competing programs such as Orange is The New Black.

Fortunately, we owe it to the Wentworth cast, creators ( Reg Watson, Lara Radulovich) and crew for creating a modern version of the old original “Prisoner,” series which ran from 1978-1986 on SoHo. 

With that in mind it’s no surprise Wentworth season 8 and season 9 have been commissioned, making fans wonder, how the plot will develop for the finale. 

Further, it’s predicted Wentworth seasons 8 and 9 will go into production mid-October 2019 and wrap mid-June 2020. 

The show’s direction has fans diving in more deeply on the direction of Wentworth, especially after Wentworth Con 2019. 

Question and answer sessions sparked many questions about further seasons including: 

Why is “The Freak,” alive and who let her out of the grave? 

Does Bea Smith (Danielle Cormack) have a chance at returning? 

Most importantly, Franky and Bridget’s relationship (mostly because of her development as a character, it would be nice to see more of her.

There are endless questions for each character and that’s what makes everything so exciting.

The Wentworth Con Q&A panels were everything fans expected and more, for example, the overwhelming emotion to see a packed ballroom with Wentworth fans who know every line for every brilliant character. 

Most importantly, it brought Wentworth talent to tears as they filled with utter shock and love due to the amount of admiration. 

Nicole Da Silvia (who will be at Wentworth 2020 in Chicago) opened up about Wentworth, sharing her thoughts on it feeling “surreal,” on an online Australian news outlet: 

“I’m getting more and more sideways glances now the show is available here. People are coming up to me in the supermarket. I’ve had a few fan encounters, which is kind of surreal. I’m very used to not being recognized at all.”

Cormack shared “it’s a dream come true,” to the cast and crew. 

“You’d be hard-pressed to find any actor, producer, director or crew member who doesn’t want their work to reach as far and wide as it can.”

“For our show to be recognized internationally is a testament to the stories, themes, characters, and performances. It’s incredibly exciting and I’m really proud.”

Kiana Clark On Wentworth Con 2019

First, it’s important to note, taking the time to put together any kind of convention takes an immense amount of patience, passion and time. Kiana Clark opened up about the feeling of seeing fans and talent come together repeatedly for successful Q&A’s to private round-table meet and greets.

“Thank you so much! I can’t even put this feeling into words. At the end of the first event, I sat in the hotel room with my wife (Amanda) and best friend (Danielle) and just cried. Happy tears. I was SO happy with what we created and how happy we made everyone feel. It truly makes all the hard work “worth it” to see happy, smiling faces all day long. To see the fans “dreams” come true when they meet their favorite cast members. It’s therapeutic, really. I know this sounds “cliche” but I’ve been producing events for 12 years, and have been so passionate about my career. I often get wrapped up in the structure and organization that I don’t stop and see the overall result. But with Wentworth Con, the fans have gone out of their way to thank me and thank my staff for creating this event and doing something that they never thought would happen (Meeting cast who live across the world). And for me to produce an event that results in “dreams coming true”… there are no words for how rewarding that feels. The feeling in that panel room. It’s not your typical “convention”. It’s an event filled with love, encouragement, support, and hope! People share stories, talk about difficult topics and how they overcame them, and how the show has helped them in numerous ways. It is so overwhelming. There’s love for the show. Love for the cast. And love for each other! There are some AMAZING friendships forming at Wentworth Con. I hope we can keep this going for years to come!

Further, it’s inspiring to watch Kiana Clark hard at work, she’s incredibly inspiring and positive. Chances are her volunteers who have an absolute blast all while strengthening their set of skills.

Isn’t it true we all have our favorite scenes?

Clark opened up about her favorite scene even though there are so many that are unforgettable.

“AH! This is so hard. There are many. BUT, the first that comes to mind is when Bea shoots Brayden Holt. I think it was because we saw such heartache from Bea when she lost Debbie, and we all started “rooting” for her to get revenge.”

WENTWORTH CON AND EQUALITY 

As previously mentioned, Wentworth Con does stand out because the fans, they see themselves through the characters and can relate.

Most importantly, Kiana Clark also touched on how the show influences different issues in the world.

“The thing about Wentworth is… it touches on some real issues in the world, issues that, unfortunately, many people have been experienced first hand.

Domestic Violence. Losing a Child. Sexual Abuse. Dementia. Drugs. etc.

People relate to these stories, to these characters. And it hits “home.” They fall in love with the characters. They see a lot of “themselves” in the characters. Tammy MacIntosh and I spoke in great detail about Wentworth Con in LA and saying ‘I don’t think you know what you created.'”

Honestly, she created a convention that feels like home. There is nothing better than attending an event where you feel good, and where you don’t feel like a “black sheep,” because of how you relate to real-life situations.

The whole Wentworth cast and crew did an amazing job at delivering the message of love, compassion, struggle, regrets, and different relatable hardships.

Despite our struggles, it was comforting to attend Wentworth Con, share our struggles during the Q&A and get a true response from the talent who took on our trials and successfully delivered it on screen. 

Positive Celebrity review on Wentworth Con 2019

Perfection, no other words fit.

At this point, it’s safe to say, Wentworth Con 2019 is by far one of the best conventions I’ve ever had the opportunity to attend and cover.

Ultimately, the convention has been everything and more to those who have been able to attend, and there’s no doubt the crowd will be back for Wentworth Con’s upcoming events.

“Our next events are in Chicago April 4, 2020 (tickets on sale Dec 8 at 12pm EST) and Whippany, NJ August 1-2, 2020!”

Wentworth Con Hilarious Moments 

It was Chelsey Handler who said, “if you can make someone laugh you can make someone listen.” 

She was completely right, Danielle left us with a joke that will last a lifetime after she shared a story about her pant zipper problems. 

“I’ve been having this zipper problem today, I’m about to take a picture and there’s my… “ 

And then you hear a loud shout from within the crowd “Pineapple!” 

Danielle Cormack lost it, laughing “is that what you call it, okay, my pineapple.” She continued, “you guys are never going to be able to look at a pineapple the same,” the fans lost it. 

DANIELLE CORMACK – PINEAPPLE VIDEO SNIPPET 

The moment Danielle Cormack ran to the stage from the opposite end of the venue the crowd went wild. She truly is the “top dog.” She loved to react scenes, answer questions and most importantly, be herself on stage. 

Isn’t it inspiring to see actors for who they are up and personal?

In the end, we have the perfect idea of how talented they truly are, it’s a whole new world when we aren’t just seeing them play a character on our TV screens. Cormack had some funny moments with the fans, sharing how her zipper was down during the Wentworth Con round table meet and greets. 

And we all left that panel with a new outlook on Pineapples.

CELIA IRELAND ON ACTING DRUNK (coming soon).

During Celia Irelands Q&A at Wentworth Con 2019 fans truly wanted to know “how she played being sh*tfaced on set,” proceeding to laugh and inquire if she was actually drunk. 

Ireland laughed hysterically sharing jokes about being allergic to most alcohols. 

Despite not drinking much, she showed everyone just how she managed to act so wasted on set and it was brilliant. 

TAMMY MACINTOSH BEST MOMENTS (coming soon)

Next, there’s the gorgeous and energetic Tammy Macintosh who shared a lot of behind the scenes which were fun to film. 

LIBBY TANNER ON KISSING FRANKY (coming soon)

Lastly, Libby Tanner who played as Nicole Da Silvia’s therapist in Wentworth shared how their relationship developed and when she felt her character, Bridget fell in love with Franky. 

Most importantly, we wanted to know, was Franky a good kisser? 

MEET AND GREET ROUNDTABLES 

The Wentworth Con 2019 provided us more than just a Q&A. It allowed us to meet and take pictures with Libby Tanner, Celia Ireland, Danielle Cormack, and Tammy Macintosh. 

The convention provided beautiful photos that were used for the autographing time-slot. During this we were able to thank, laugh and joke around, it felt very personal and it was fun. 

Most importantly, the round table meet-and-greets where fans spent quality time with the actors, shared stories that inspired and took extra pictures. 

WHERE CAN YOU WATCH WENTWORTH? 

Wentworth season 8 (all previous seasons with subscription only), $8.99 USD

YouTube (with subscription only). $1.99 USD

iTunes (with subscription only), $1.99 USD

Amazon Prime (with subscription only), $1.99 USD. 

Foxtel Now (is a subscription streaming service delivering great entertainment including TV shows, Movies, News and live sport. Members are only charged for the packs they select and can cancel anytime. If you’re new to Foxtel Now get a 10 day free trial of all content packs), $25.00 USD 

Stay tuned for our full panel edits!

Stay up-to-date on future Wentworth Con conventions!

View this post on Instagram

How about this line up!?

.

Our Guests for #WentworthCon Chicago are: Danielle Cormack, Libby Tanner, Nicole da Silva, and Socratis Otto!

.

Tickets on sale Dec 7 for the fan club patreon members (patreon.com/wentworthcon) .

General on-sale is Sun Dec 8, at 12pm EST at (wentworthcon.com)

A post shared by The Official Wentworth Con (@wentworth_con) on Nov 27, 2019 at 1:09pm PST

Wentworth Con: https://www.wentworthcon.com/ Wentworth Con

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/WentworthCon/ Wentworth Con

Twitter: https://twitter.com/WentworthCon/

Blessed be!

The post Positive Celebrity Exclusive: Wentworth Con 2019 was a complete success! appeared first on Positive Celebrity News and Gossip.

Related posts:

Positive Celebrity Exclusive: Wentworth Con 2019! (preview)

Related posts brought to you by YARPP.

from WordPress https://positivecelebrity.news/2019/12/16/positive-celebrity-exclusive-wentworth-con-2019-was-a-complete-success/

[nightingiall]

plaid shirt days and nights (when you made me your own) // part 6

{previous parts here}

High school feels like it happened a hundred years ago, and so does that freshman year biology class. The memories of a simpler time lie behind a fog that grows thicker with time in Zoe’s mind, but somehow, those memories don’t matter all that much right now. Not when she’s got the opportunity to make newer and better ones.

Navigating her relationship with Niall hasn’t exactly been a smooth ride, but there’s a mutual understanding of what the other means to each of them, and on particularly challenging days, all they need to do is remember that. They both have their flaws, of course—sometimes Zoe finds herself holding back a bit too much, and that will in turn cause Niall to tread around her more cautiously until they both catch onto what’s happening and they fall into an easy rhythm again.

It’s been a learning process, too. Zoe has to constantly remind herself to not get too lost in her head, not to fall into that chasm of overthinking that always has her pushing everything around her away away away. She’s noticed that Niall’s slowly understanding that it’s okay to let go of her because she’ll always come back to him, but this only came after a lengthy conversation they’d had on Niall’s couch at four am when Zoe’d gone out with Jaya and hadn’t told Niall about it.

During the past few months, though, they’ve lived up to the decision they’d made that night in front of Zoe’s car, that they’d take this slow, and Zoe has to say that it’s a decision that’s had its pros and cons. For starters, she hasn’t kissed him since that night at his place—well, that might not be entirely true; Niall’s pressed a few fleeting kisses to her lips a handful of times when they knew real life would keep them away from each other for a while. But, on the other hand, it’s made other tiny gestures a bit more meaningful, like intertwined fingers when they’re walking down the street or preparing a meal together or getting the other person’s toothbrush ready when it’s time to go to bed. It’s been beyond anything Zoe’s ever dreamed of, and even if she wanted to, she really can’t complain.

They’re meant to go to Jade’s wedding today, and Zoe wakes up early just for the occasion. But, the past few nights have been a bit rough, and Zoe feels them catching up to her that morning with the dull throb in her temples. The headache hasn’t subsided despite her hearty breakfast, so she decides to take an aspirin and relax on the couch for an hour or so. After all, it’s still quite early, and she has many hours ahead of her before she can start to get dressed.

Time just flies by, though, as it always seems to do when Zoe’s not paying attention, and before she knows it there’s a familiar hand on her shoulder and someone murmuring her name and that “Zo, babe, you need to wake up now.”

Zoe didn’t even realize when she fell asleep, but when she opens her eyes, Niall’s there, smiling at her with his kind, sparkling eyes and she distantly wonders how she ever got so lucky. “Damnit,” she mutters, tossing off the throw blanket and nearly knocking Niall over as she shot up. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to fall asleep!” Before she knows it, Niall’s helping her fold the blanket before he gently pushes her in the direction of her bathroom. “How late am I?”

Niall hums, glancing at his nice, expensive-looking watch. “Well,” he shrugs, “we’re supposed to be leaving in twenty minutes.”

“Shit.” She catches the towel Niall tosses at her and scurries into her bathroom, mumbling another apology over her shoulder only for Niall to respond with a laugh. She can’t get over how much she loves the sound and how it echoes all over her apartment.

After a quick shower before she brushes the sleep away from her mouth, she slips into her dress for the wedding that she’d left hanging behind the door for the steam to soften the few wrinkles. She manages to get the zipper up about halfway before she gives up on struggling with it, instead reaching for her blow dryer to take care of her dripping hair.

As much as she would have liked, she didn’t have the time to get her hair as dry as she wanted, so she gives up when she’s just over the halfway mark in favor of doing her makeup instead. Her vanity is a mess. Her whole week was spent with hectic mornings of tossing makeup around before rushing off to work and she hasn’t had the time to tidy it up. She looks at all of her dirty makeup brushes and heaves an overwhelmed sigh.

“You okay, sunshine?” comes Niall’s voice from behind her. His hands smooth over her shoulders before his fingers follow the line of the back of her dress to pull the zipper the rest of the way up. He meets her eyes in the mirror and Zoe feels a tiny swoop in her belly at the bright bright bright blue. She hasn’t told him that she loves him since that night they had to have an intervention about his separation anxiety on his couch, but she feels the words creeping up her throat at the sight of him now. He looks good, having long ditched the bleach in favor of having his dark hair grow out. His eyes shine brighter and bluer and he absolutely glows more and more every time she looks at him. She thinks that some of his newfound happiness has rubbed off onto herself as well, because she finds that the circles under her eyes are no longer as dark, and smiles are no longer as difficult to come by.

Niall looks like he understands what she’s thinking and sends her a small, knowing smile. They’ve been having moments like this quite a bit recently, just sitting around in silence, not finding the words to express just how content they’ve been feeling and yet not really needing them to understand. She skims her fingers over his knuckles now, leaning her temple gently against his right wrist and sends him a smile of her own. “Getting ready just seems like so much work right now.”

At that, Niall chuckles, moving his fingers to smooth them down her hair instead. “Y’know, you can just go like this and I’m sure you’d still be the most beautiful girl there. Apart from Jade, obviously.”

Zoe rolls her eyes in response, blushing nonetheless. “Shut up,” she mumbles, her voice getting lost somewhere in the cuffs of his shirt sleeves as she shifts her face away from his gaze. His pulse is a steady thrum against her temple.

Niall leans down to press his lips to her cheek, his laughter seeping into her skin and warming her from the inside out. “Need any help then?”

She knows he might’ve been joking, but she also knows that if she wants to make it to this wedding on time, then she needs all the help she can get. “You know,” she starts, turning around to face him. His beauty strikes her for a moment and her words get stuck in her throat at the smile he gives her. She almost can’t believe this is real. “It would actually be a major help if you could help out with my hair.”

Niall grins, and something about it has her heart skipping a beat. “Sure,” he shrugs, “what do you need me to do?”

And that’s how she ends up trusting him to hold her straightener frighteningly close to her face as she attempts not to flinch too badly while doing her makeup. She’s putting on some lipstick when she realizes something, being transported back to all those months ago in his bedroom before the reunion when, in a crazy twist of fate, she was the one doing his hair and he was the one flinching. They’ve come so far since then, and it almost seems surreal how destiny seemed to bring them together again.

“You’re staring at me,” Niall says without looking at her, focused on trying to get a particularly stubborn section of her hair to cooperate with him. Zoe smiles at his reflection but doesn’t say anything. She can’t find the words to articulate how she’s feeling at the moment, so she settles for spritzing some setting spray over her makeup instead. “Okay,” he huffs after what seems to be an eternity. “I think I’m done.”

Zoe brings all her hair over her shoulder and surveys his work. “Huh.” She runs a bit of product through her ends to maintain some of the shine. “Looks good, babe. Thanks.” She gets up to give him an appreciative peck on his cheek and reaches behind her for her clutch.

“Ready to go, then?” His hands are warm on the small of her back, and Zoe nearly wishes for time to freeze right here, just so she can savor this moment for a bit longer. Instead, she nods, allowing Niall to slip her hand into his after she grabs Jade’s wedding gift and her keys.

And even if neither of them said it, Zoe hears the unspoken I love you in the way Niall stopped her to wipe away a bit of the lipstick on her face smeared from where her hair caught in it, and she knows he heard hers in the way she smiled in thanks.

~

Zoe holds Niall’s hand as they enter the venue and as soon as they step in, the screams are immediate.

She knows she should have expected it, really. Maura had the same reaction a few weeks ago when they finally broke the news to her that they’d been talking again. Even through the low-quality Skype stream, her elated tears were clear.

It’s not like they intended for it to be a secret, it’s just that they were intent on taking it slow, taking it day by day and hoping for the best. Five years is a long, long time, and only time can heal the toll that takes on a relationship.

“You sneaky bastards!” Perrie’s screeching into Zoe’s ear before she even lifts her eyes to see her, engulfing them in a hug before either of them has the chance to get a greeting out. “When did this happen and why didn’t you tell us?!”

Niall laughs, but before he can say anything, the rest of the gang are surrounding them, with Harry and Liam breaking out into some sort of celebratory dance and Louis miraculously producing a bottle of champagne from out of nowhere. Perrie, Jesy, and Leigh are all screaming as they jump around in their little group hug, the excitement coursing through all of them palpable. Zoe thinks Leigh actually cries at one point.

“Okay, okay,” Zoe laughs, but she’s screaming too and she doesn’t even really know why. “I’m excited too but we have a wedding to attend!”

“Oh my god, Jade is going to absolutely freak when she sees the two of you together!” Jesy is patting tears away as well and Zoe wonders how she ever forgot how emotional they all could be. “I can’t believe I’m crying and the wedding hasn’t even started yet.”

“I know!” Perrie gives Zoe a light smack on the shoulder. “Way to keep us out of the loop, Zoe, what a great friend you are.”

Zoe knows Perrie’s just being sarcastic but she can’t help the way her words pull at her for a moment. She hasn’t been the greatest at keeping them aware of what’s happening in her life and she truly feels terrible for it. But since the reunion, she’s been better with keeping in touch, and this, like her relationship with Niall, is a work in progress that is one of her top priorities. “I know, I’m sorry,” she replies, and the atmosphere shifts to one that feels intimate in the way it can only be with close friends. “It was a lot happening and we’re still taking it day by day. But I promise to fill you guys in on everything after the wedding.”

They seem content with this answer because, once they’ve all taken a flute of champagne from Louis, they all walk together to their seats at the front of the venue. Zoe feels a wave of nostalgia, even with this simple action, and she remembers them walking together like this so many times before, in the halls of their high school and through the doors of Miss America. And like everything else, this is different too, because they’re all grown up and yet fate has found a way to keep them all together.

Niall slips his hand into hers once again when they take their seats in their row. Now that she gets a chance to look around and take in the space, she finds that the venue is absolutely gorgeous. She can see where Jade’s put her creative touches; they’re in the flower arrangements—pink and white roses and hydrangeas—and in the ribbons and bows decorating the rows. Zoe leans her head onto Niall’s shoulder, feeling a bit sentimental for a moment.

Niall gives her hand a squeeze and Zoe looks up to give him a smile, and in this moment, everything feels perfect.

~

“You sneaky bastards!” screeches Jade as she runs towards them as best as she can with her gown. Zoe can’t help but laugh at this apparent phrase of the day. “Imagine how I felt when I looked out after just getting married to see my two estranged best friends holding hands in the audience?! Like, I was already crying but you two just about gave me a heart attack!”

Jade pulls her into a hug and before Zoe knows it, she’s being engulfed by the girls again, each of them chattering away happily and excitedly as they try not to cry any more than they already have. This time, the boys join in the hug as well, and Zoe’s heart feels full to the point of spilling over.

When they pull away, Zoe’s the first to speak. “Jade, you look gorgeous. I’m really happy for you.”

Jade sniffles, patting away a tear so she doesn’t smear her makeup. “Well I hope I still do after all the tears I’ve just shed.”

At that, they all laugh, and in a flurry of movement, Jade is being ushered to the back of the reception hall where she’ll be walking in with her husband shortly and the rest of them are sent to their tables. The ceremony was elegant and beautiful, just like Jade, and everything from the vows to the way the happy couple looked at each other with so much love had everyone in the venue reaching for a tissue.

Now, as they welcome the newly married couple into their reception space where they’re about to have their first dance as husband and wife, Zoe leans her head onto Niall chest, his arms slipping easily around her, and as someone snaps a photo of them Zoe gets the feeling that she will remember this moment for a long, long time.

~

Zoe feels very, very happy and a little too buzzed.

“I can’t believe you didn’t at least text us,” Jade slurred. They’re taking a break from dancing at the moment. Zoe’s feet hurt and the dance floor started to get a bit too stuffy for her liking. They’re all sitting in the gardens and it feels like a fancier version of sitting in one of their backyards back in the day because they’re all slightly drunk and high off excitement. “I mean, what happened to our code red Skype sessions?! I feel very blindsided right now.”

Zoe shrugs, taking a swig from the champagne bottle they’d grabbed from one of the tables inside and passing it on to Perrie, who takes an even bigger gulp. “I didn’t think it was a code red.”

Jesy scoffs. “A code yellow maybe? This is important stuff, Zo, you’ve gotta keep us in the loop.”

“I’m sorry.” Zoe leans her head onto Perrie’s shoulder. “I was feeling a lot of things that I needed to sort through. And Niall and I needed to have a very lengthy conversation about everything that happened and everything we saw happening in the future.”

At that, Leigh is the one that scoffs. “How did you even get Niall to agree to that? He’s like, allergic to talking about his feelings.”

Zoe shrugs again, leaning back into her chaise. “We’re on the same page. Neither of us wants to get hurt again. Nor do we want to hurt each other.”

They grow silent at her words, but it’s a comfortable one, an understood one. And it stays that way until it’s interrupted by the boys barreling down the back patio and making their way onto the grass towards them.

“Are we talking about Zoe and Niall?” Louis asks as he slumps down near a bush of flowers by Jesy’s feet, “Because Niall won’t give us the gossip and I think we deserve it since we’re at least semi-responsible for this.”

Zoe snorts, amused. “What?” In front of her, Niall is giving Louis a dirty look.

Harry chimes in. “What Louis means to say is that we are very curious to know how this happened since you two didn’t exactly leave the reunion on the best terms.”

Liam raises a finger. “Also, we broke into the gym just so we could force the two of you together to dance your song so we definitely do deserve some of the credit.”

At that, Zoe chips in. “How were you guys able to break into the building that easily though? I couldn’t have been the only one that was slightly concerned.”

Everyone murmurs their assent and Louis rolls his eyes. “He didn’t break in, he went earlier on in the day to ask the janitor to leave the door open for us.”

Liam at least has the guts to look sheepish. “The breaking-in story sounded so much cooler.”

Their laughter echoes throughout the gardens. Zoe holds her hand out for Niall to join her on the chaise, and when he does, she leans into him.

“Okay,” she breathes out, glancing at Niall for reassurance. When he smiles at her, she continues on. “Here’s what happened…”

~

The party is winding down but Zoe's having too much fun to even think about leaving.

She’s had way too many glasses of champagne but she can’t help herself because it tastes like the best champagne she’s ever had. She feels like she hasn’t felt this happy and full of life in a long, long time, so she savors it. But despite that, something in her tells her that this is only the beginning of many more happy days, and for once, she chooses to believe it.

She catches Niall’s eye from the other side of the room and that’s when it happens. Amy Winehouse’s voice starts to surround the room through the speakers and everything feels like it’s stopped around them. Time stands still for a moment, and it’s just Zoe and Niall watching each other from opposite sides of the room, their feet thinking for themselves as they move towards each other like they’re in a trance.

The world whirrs to life around them again when their hands meet as Niall pulls her arms around so her wrists lock at the back of his neck, his own wrapping around her waist, hands resting at the small of her back. “Hi,” he says, and Zoe grins.

She can’t help how absolutely enamored he makes her. Suddenly, all the words that she’s kept inside since this morning come flowing out effortlessly. “I love you like crazy,” she murmurs, and this time, Niall’s the one grinning.

He leans down to rest his forehead on hers, arms tightening around her. Amy Winehouse croons: Will you still love me tomorrow? Niall replies, “I love you forever.”

Zoe kisses him, finally, and it feels like the first time, feels like a beginning of a new chapter that she’s so very excited to watch unfold. She rests her head in the crook of his neck, lets the song wash over her as they sway gently to the music. Like so many times tonight, she’s distinctly aware of how different things are from the last time they did this, danced to this very song surrounded by the same people. It’s strange how life can flip so quickly and so effortlessly and yet feel so right.

The song winds down and the DJ transitions into something by Adele. Zoe would have been content with swaying the night away with Niall but he takes the moment to lean down and bring his lips to her ear. “Wanna get a drink?”

She gets a flash of the reunion, how she pulled apart from Niall after that dance just to reach for a bottle of vodka instead. “Yeah,” she responds, this time taking his hand and letting him lead her to the bar for something lighter. She doesn’t need to feel numb anymore.

Niall gets her a drink from the bar and they head back out to the gardens to sit under a weeping willow. The night is quiet around them, save for the distant sounds of the party, and the breeze is gentle and warm over her skin. She leans into Niall and closes her eyes, savoring the moment for what it is, perfect.

Niall pulls her into him with an arm around her, one hand resting along her hip and the other holding his glass. “You know,” he starts, skimming his lips along her forehead, “if you told me a few months ago that we’d end up here I would’ve laughed.”

Zoe smiles, chuckling against him. Niall’s skin is warm along her face. “Almost feels like a dream, doesn’t it?”

Around them, crickets are chirping, singing a song only they know. Beside her, Niall hums. “Yeah well,” he shrugs, “thankfully it’s not a dream.” As if for good measure, he pokes her hard with the hand that’s on her hip, and when she yelps, spilling a bit of what’s left of her drink, he laughs. She scowls up at him, but it’s all banter, because when he leans down to kiss her, she smiles again.

“I love you,” she says, because she can’t help it; the words just flow out of her.

This time, Niall doesn’t reply. Instead, he puts his glass down so he can caress her face properly and kiss her like he’s never kissed her before.

And Zoe understands, because sometimes words just aren’t necessary.

~

Zoe kicks her shoes off as soon as she walks through her front door. Her feet ache, and she thinks back to all the times throughout the night Niall offered to carry her. She should’ve taken him up on his offers. She knows she’s probably drunk because Niall gave her strict orders not to walk too far from him as they made the trip from the car to her apartment, but she doesn’t feel drunk. She just feels really, very happy.

“God, I need to get all this shit off my face,” she grumbles, heading straight to the bathroom, Niall’s laugh echoing behind her. Sometime during the night the wedding cake was cut and icing ended up on everyone’s faces and she feels like she can still feel the sugar sitting on her skin.

She goes through her nightly cleansing routine, taking her time to make sure every bit of makeup has been removed. Niall appears in the doorway and she watches him through the mirror as he tugs on his tie and musses up his hair with his fingers at the same time. “I told ya you don’t need to put all that stuff on. You’re still breathtaking without it.”

Zoe shoots him an unimpressed look but she can’t help the way her stomach flutters at the way he grins at her. “You flatter me, Ni, but how about you help me unzip this dress instead.”

With that, she gets a waggle of his brows as his grin grows impossibly wider. “Don’t mind if I do.”

Zoe blushes. They haven’t been physically intimate with each other yet, and she’s not sure if she wants to change that tonight. She’s not certain how slow is too slow, and she gets a wave of panic for a split second when Niall’s fingers close around her zip because she doesn’t want to come across as too cautious. It’s just that she can’t help being vigilant about them and their relationship because she doesn’t want anything to go wrong. If she lost him again she doesn’t know what she’d do with herself.

Niall doesn’t try anything though. Instead, he tugs her zipper all the way down and then wraps his arms around her, tucking his chin into the curve of her neck, and Zoe shifts her head to allow him more room. He presses the lightest kiss to her cheek before shifting to watch her through the mirror, and his smile makes her heart flutter. Like so many times tonight, she has to wonder how she got so lucky.

“It’s not a lie, you know.” Niall’s voice is a soft murmur but Zoe feels like she can feel the gentleness of it wash over her entire body. The feeling is unexplainable.

She smiles. “What?”

Niall presses his lips to her cheek again. “That you’re beautiful.”

This time, the flush is a bit too intense, and Zoe can feel the color fill her cheeks before she has the time to cover her face with her hands. “Shut up.”

Niall laughs softly, leaning back on the sink counter so he can pull her into his chest instead. They stay like that for a while, with his arms around her and her face buried in his collar, just breathing and savoring the moment. When Zoe thinks that the overwhelming burn of her blush has left her skin, she looks up at him only to find his eyes closed. Without thinking, she presses her lips to his nose, and then again to his chin, and then again to his chest, just over his heart, and when she makes it back up to his lips, they’re curved up in a smile.

“You know,” she starts, “as much as I’d like to stay with you like this, I really need to shower.”

Niall huffs out a chuckle. “Yeah, you do. You stink.”

Zoe scoffs, smacking his chest with the back of her hand and pushing him away. “Get out!”

Niall’s laugh bounces off her bathroom tiles and echoes all around her, even when she shuts the door behind him, and she has to press her forehead to the cool exterior of it to bite back the giggle that’s sitting in the back of her throat.

They take their turns in the bathroom, and by the time Niall’s about done, Zoe feels the exhaustion kicking in as she’s re-organizing her makeup from the disaster she left it in. It’s about three in the morning, and she feels fresh and clean and ready for bed. Her feet are still throbbing a bit, and she smiles as she thinks back at the way the rest of the group couldn’t seem to leave each other back at the reception. She held her girls tight in the group hug before leaving, and even if it’s only been a few hours, she already misses them.

She gives up on trying to deal with the mess she left behind on her vanity and makes herself comfortable in bed before Niall even gets out. By the time he joins her under the blanket, she’s dozing off. She waits until he’s settled in before she shifts closer, tangling her fingers with his and pressing her head to his shoulder.

Niall’s fingers are warm as they gently skim across hers, and he fiddles with them for a brief moment before taking a deep breath. “Can I tell you a secret?” he says softly. Zoe’s tired, but even through her blurry vision as she cracks her eyes open to look at him, his eyes sparkle. She grins, nodding. The day has made her overwhelmed with emotion, and words will not be able to explain how full her heart feels. “We weren’t supposed to have a reunion.”

This time, Zoe opens her eyes fully, and she can’t help but laugh. “What?”

Niall smiles, completely holding her hand this time. “Pez and Jade were adamant that we should have it after ten years. Thought five was too short of a time for it to make sense.” Niall’s words take a bit to fully register to her, but once she’s processed the gravity of them, he gets her full attention. “But apparently Harry convinced them to change their mind.”

Zoe’s heart stutters in her chest. “What?” Apparently, it’s the only word she’s capable of producing at the moment. Niall’s eyes grow impossibly wide and puppy-like, and Zoe realizes her face must look incredulous. “Alright,” she sighs, shifting to sit up against the headboard so she doesn’t fall asleep listening to this because she genuinely wants to know what he’s going on about. “Get talking.”

She watches as he nibbles on his lower lip before sitting up as well. He makes a point not to look at her. “Well,” he starts, tangling and untangling his fingers in the hem of the sheet. “It was Harry’s idea, and I didn’t know about it until I got there and he told me about it when we all met up at Miss America. Basically, they tried to parent trap us.” At that, Zoe snorts, leaning her head on his shoulder. She finds his hand under the sheet and tangles her fingers within his, and at her touch, Niall physically relaxes. “At the time, I didn’t really care because I didn’t think you’d show up.”

Zoe smiles. “I wasn’t going to.”

She gets a squeeze of her hand in response, and she doesn’t have to look at Niall to know he’s smiling too. “But then I saw you at the diner the next day and—I dunno, I didn’t know what to do with myself. I’d spent the past few years suppressing my feelings and my memories of you that I didn’t really realize how angry I was until I saw you again.”

“Ah,” she says, nodding, “that explains why the milkshake was spilled over my lap and not over my head.”

He huffs out a laugh and she glances up at him to see the shadow of a smile ghost over his face. “I was gonna tell you about it that day I was leaving but I knew you’d try and stop me so we could talk about it and I really just couldn’t handle reliving the hurt again.” Something heavy settles over them now, just like every time they talk about this, but there’s something different about it this time. It feels honest in a way it hasn’t been, and Zoe gets the feeling that this will be the last time they have this conversation for a while. “Zo.” Niall shifts so his lips press against her hairline. “I’m really sorry. And I know I keep saying it but I hate the way I treated things and the way I let my assumptions get the best of me. I hate that I accepted you leaving and didn’t try harder to come after you.”

“Niall—”

“Zo, please let me finish.” He shifts so they’re eye to eye, and Zoe can see all of his remorse in the bright blue. She recognizes the look. She used to see it in her own eyes, that guilt, that self-deprecation, and she felt something sink in her stomach at the sight of it now. “I can’t stop thinking about that day you came to me, soaked from the rain because you couldn’t lose me again, and I can’t help but wonder why I didn’t try to do that for you, why I didn’t try to find you.” He sighs, closing his eyes, and Zoe runs her fingers over his cheek. His skin is hot against her hand. “I can’t stop thinking of the way you said you hated yourself because—because I feel like it’s all my fault.”

Zoe frowns, shifting closer to him. “But it’s not. It never was.” When Niall opens his eyes, she smiles at him. “And honestly does it even matter? We both messed up, we were both victims of circumstances.” She holds his hand tight in hers. “But we’re here now, and I love you, and you love me, and we’ve talked, and we’re so, so happy.” This time, Niall smiles too. “You make me so happy. And I know we’re taking it day by day but I don’t even care because I’m here with you and nothing else matters.”

Niall is quiet for a long time, and Zoe takes the opportunity to settle back under the blanket and wait for him to do the same. When he does, he’s the one that presses his head to her shoulder this time. “You’re the only one for me.” His voice is barely a whisper, but when his words register in her head, she’s transported back to another moment, back in her childhood room with the windows open, back to a drunken night where all she felt was shame and sadness, back to a bed that only had her in it, but also had a warm side that was empty in the morning.

Zoe’s breath catches in her throat. It’s very dark in her room, the only light being from the glow of the clock on her nightstand and the small nightlight she has in the far corner. She sits up in a rush, fumbling blindly through the top drawer of her nightstand, and then, finding nothing, through the second.

“Zo?” comes Niall’s voice from behind her. He sounds confused, and Zoe understands because she feels confused. Suddenly, a lot of things are clicking into place, and everything Niall’s done and said and written is making a lot more sense.

When her fingers close around the box, her heartbeat slows down, and she feels a sort of calm wash over her. She pops it open, and whatever light is in the room immediately catches on the reflective material of the ring.

“You’re the only one for me.”

Zoe speaks without looking at Niall. “You came back that night, didn’t you?”

She listens as Niall sighs. “Yeah.” It’s the only thing he says for a while, and when she finally looks at him, he’s biting his lips. “I didn’t really think you’d remember.” Zoe nearly laughs because she understands. She had a lot to drink that night.

“Why?” she breathes out. She realizes that could mean a lot of things: Why did you come back? Why didn’t you stay? Why didn’t you remind me?

At this point, they’re both sitting up in the middle of the bed. Niall reaches out to smooth her hair out of her face, a tender smile on his face. “Because I still loved you.” Zoe’s lips wobble at his words, and she feels like this is a moment that should involve her crying. But no tears come out, because she’s not sad, or angry, or emotional. She just understands, and she feels like that is the most important feeling she’s had throughout this whole experience. Niall takes a deep breath and Zoe doesn’t take her eyes off him. “I was driving home and I realized there was still so much I had to say to you. I turned back around and went to your place, worked up the courage to ring the doorbell, but no one answered.”

He places his hand over hers holding the box. She hangs on to every single one of his words with bated breath.

“So I went around to your window to see if your lights were on and found that it was open so I climbed up the pipe like I used to. But then I found you on the floor with way too many bottles around you and I got worried so I nearly called your dad but then you woke up. And you started crying and apologizing and you were holding the ring and I—I realized that if I’m going to leave and never see you again then I should—I at least wanted to see how the ring would look on your finger, at least once.”

Niall’s voice trails off by the end, but Zoe pleads with him with her eyes to continue.

“And it was more perfect than I ever imagined it to look,” he murmurs. Once again, the glint of the ring catches her eye, but just like that night, Niall manages to slip it onto her finger without her noticing, and just like the first time, it takes her breath away. “You should keep it on.”

Zoe smiles, leaning forward so her head rests against his chest and he brings his arms around her, holding her close. “Maybe I’ll put it on the other hand for now, just so people don’t think we’re getting married. We did tell everyone we’re taking it slow.”

At that, Niall laughs, and Zoe closes her eyes against his chest and lets the sound wash over her. She holds up her hand to the light again, watching as the light dances over the facets of the ring, and she smiles. When she looks up at Niall, he’s already watching her, mirroring her fond look in his own eyes. “Hey,” she whispers, her fingers tracing the line of his jaw, and he hums. “You’re the only one for me, too.”

When Niall kisses her, it feels like the ultimate closure, something she didn’t think they both needed until now.

And they smile, because despite all they’ve been through, it feels like they have a long future ahead of them.

–

a/n: hey guys! it’s been a minute! i just want to thank everyone who’s supported and read and given feedback on this little story of mine. i know it took forever and a day to get all the parts up, but this story means so much to me and i didn’t realize how much of my heart and soul this took until i cried a little writing in the very last sentence of zoe and niall’s story. 

i want to thank so many people who’ve kept me going on this journey: kay for inspiring me to even write it because of her love for ‘all too well’; fran and natasha for their lovely and articulate reviews on 1dff that i used to go back and read whenever i was in a funk (even if they’re gone now *cries* i still remember them); kelly and el and everyone who consistently left me messages and feedback on my work. i appreciate you more than you can ever imagine. 

as always, let me know what you think! i’m unbelievably happy that this story is completed (i actually finished something can you believe this?!) and i hope you love it as much as i do. <3