#and then after that... I don't know. I'd like to do a few renders. and maybe make Soul fortnite dance. sure. whatever

[tridentkickflipper123]

I just did the world's most dogshit rigging ever

[dumbkid4ever]

It's Not Your Fault

Kinich x reader! In which:

Your boyfriend comes home from work and the first sentence he told you was "somebody kissed me today."

1,747 words 9,461 characters

It was almost midnight, the time your boyfriend told you he'd come home. Like many other times when he had to work till late, you sat on the couch with a lamp illuminating the book in your hands so that you can tell the letters apart. The plot wasn't particularly interesting, but the characters were relatable and pretty well written.

Just as you were getting to the climax of the story, you heard the sound of the door unlocking. Without hesitation, you put down your book (after placing a bookmark betweent the pages of course) and leaped towards the front entrance to welcome your beloved home. Barely did the door open when you had already thrown yourself at the figure before you.

"Honey! Welcome home," you grinned, nuzzling your cheek into the crook of his neck. Usually he would've greeted you back by now, but all you got was an arm weakly patting against your back. Noticing this, you stepped back to see what was up.

"Kinich? You alright?" you asked worriedly. His face was a few shades paler than you remember, his eyes didn't meet yours and he kept opening and closing his mouth. Something was clearly wrong.

After a while of silence, he seemed to have found his words again. Monotonously, he uttered the following words.

"Somebody kissed me today."

In an instant, it felt as if a cold bucket of water was dumped onto you, rendering you speechless for a moment. However, it wouldn't have mattered if you could speak or not, for he was not done yet.

"I made it clear that I had a lover already, but she didn't listen and while I was occupied with something else she just did it," he explained calmly and shortly. If you had not been with him for so long, you might've misunderstood his calm as apathy, his sparse amount of words as him trying to brush it off as nothing and his unwillingness to look at you as disrespect.

But you had been with him for this long. You knew that rather than being calm, it was him struggling to express his emotions, instead of trying to downplay the situation he was just being extra blunt under stress and it wasn't that he doesn't think you're not important enough to be looked at while talking, he just didn't know how to look at you anymore.

"I- I thought I'd tell you before any misunderstanding happens. I'm pretty sure there were no witnesses but just in case someone tries to tell you anything I wanted to tell you and well I... I..."

The panic he felt was evident to you. It's hard not to see with his eyes frantically darting from furniture to furniture, his hands clenching and unclenching again, his breath going in and out at a faster pace than the one that had the power to lull you to sleep. There came a point where you couldn't bear seeing him like this anymore.

"Kinich," you called out. He stopped every movement, so did his heart for a second. "Kinich, look at me."

Only then did he finally meet your gaze. Vibrant yellows, greens and a bit of orange. How you adored his eyes, even now as his pupils dilated and tears threatening to roll down his pretty face. Slowly, as to not scare him, you opened your arms invitingly.

Immediately he moved into the safety of your embrace, wrapping around you and burying his face into your shoulder. Not long after, you felt his body quiver as soft sniffles sounded next to your ear.

"It's alright. It's not your fault, so don't you worry. It's all gonna be fine," you whispered soothingly, hoping to relieve him of the burden as much as you can, even though you yourself weren't so thrilled to hear about it.

"But I-," he was interrupted by a rather quiet hiccup, a skill he mastered at 5, "I could've stopped it. It would've been so easy."

"Don't put the blame on yourself, you were doing something else, weren't you? She exploited that and did something you have made clear was taboo. You can't be at fault for this."

Although your words made sense to him logically, and he himself already knew this on his way back home, he couldn't convince his feelings that you were speaking the truth. They kept telling him that you were only saying this so that he'd calm down and let his guard down, so that you could leave while he was in a faux sense of safety. The mixture of shame, guilt and fear was crushing him.

He hated everything about the current situation, even the heat radiating off of you. He hated how weak he felt, how his emotions were so overwhelming, how his mind won't just accept the logical truth, how he dared to doubt your words, how he had the audacity to seek comfort in your embrace despite said doubts and what he had done.

Why were you being so lenient, why were you being gentle with him when he had betrayed you? What will be the price for this? Both the betrayal from his side and the leniency you showed meant that he was now indebted to you, by a lot in fact. How will this debt be payed? There was only one possibility in his mind and the thought of it sent whatever was left of his rationale went flying out the window.

The hold he had on you tightened. His fingers dug into the side of your arms, making you wince a bit but you didn't let go of him. Memories flashed before him, terror had his heart in a grip like it's trying to suffocate him and fear flooded his mind, drowning out all thoughts.

"Please, oh please don't..."

He let out a shaky breath.

"Please, don't leave me, I'll do whatever it takes to make up for it but please, I beg of you and I promise I'll be enough, I'll do enough, just please don't go away, I'll be good, really..."

The boy's rambling continued, repeating words like a prayer, but it was so quiet you barely heard him, despite your ear being right beside him. The speed at which the words spilled out of his mouth made the words even more intelligible, but you realized where his mind was at as soon as you understood "leave."

"Hey, hey, no. I'm not gonna leave you, you don't have to pay me anything. One only has to pay when they gain something in return, but you didn't gain anything from that kiss, right?"

Your voice cracked a bit at the end, the thought of Kinich liking the kiss of someone else stinged like a needle. To your slight reassurance, he nodded into your shoulder.

"Then you don't have to pay for anything. See? I'll stay, there's nowhere else I'd want to be more than with you, I'm not going anywhere."

"But I broke our promise and hurt your trust, I should compensate for it, I have to," he continued to argue, as if trying hard to not let you convince him.

"Nonsense, you didn't do anything to me, it was that... person, who did you wrong." As an attempt to ground him back into reality, you tangled your fingers into his hair and rubbed his scalp softly. That always calmed him down, and though this time was no exception, the effect was less than usual.

"The fact that I told you already counts as hurting you. I know you're hurt by this," he retorted, now less hysteric, and you knew that he wasn't all that wrong. But still, you continued talking him out of his worries.

"A misunderstanding would've done more damage to me, telling me right away was the safest option and the one with the least damage potential. You made the choice that has the least cons for me."

Finally, he had nothing to argue with and the room fell still. Talking about pros and cons of choices may seem odd, and you would've found it very odd, had you heard this conversation a few years ago, but throughout your time together you had learnt that this was just the way Kinich was able to receive comfort. He couldn't accept simple, genuine things in relationships without paying something back, that was just what he had learnt from his childhood. Nothing comes without a price, so when someone claims something to be free, he can only face it with suspicion and disbelief.

"I won't leave you, ever. You're the only I love, the only one I trust so much and I know you only have my best interests in mind. Just your existence is enough and what you do for me, well it's more than I could ever hope to receive from a person," you spoke with a hushed tone and stepped away from the hug. The corners of his eyes were reddened and a bit of snot ran down his nose, but he looked as beautiful as ever. Delicately, you took both his hands and entertwined his slender digits in your own.

"There are more reasons to stay with you than I can count on both our fingers, you know? In contrast, I see none why I should leave. Well, aside from Ajaw, he's the only thing tainting my time with you. On the other hand though, I must say, seeing you bicker is quite entertaining," you laughed light-heartedly. To that, he smiled a little.

"Thank you," he murmured and leaned in for a kiss, one you gently returned. It didn't last very long, nor was it particularly passionate, but it expressed everything he wanted to tell you and you understood everything that he said.

"Should we go to sleep now? I'm sure you're tired from all the work. Come on, go get yourself ready for bed, I'll be waiting," you urged him, getting a hum of agreement in return. Content with that, you went to fetch your book, that was still on the couch, and stepped towards your shared bedroom.

Not long after, Kinich entered the room as well, still rubbing his hair with a towel. You were already under the blanket, watching him change into his pajamas and eventually lay down beside you. Wordlessly, he slid his limbs around your midrift and you cradled his head, which was pressed up against your chest. Your legs tangled together until neither of you knew where he started and where you ended. At last you peacefully drifted to sleep, aware that the other is always beside you.

Legit woke up in the middle of the night to write this, knowing full well I had school the next day, all because the idea came to me. Well anyways hope you enjoyed and have a pleasant day or night.

[incrtz]

How many times will it take..?

Part One

Pairing ⋆ sick! gojo x past lover! reader

Summary ⋆ You and Gojo have a past, but you still dislike him. ‘Unfortunately’, The Strongest Jujutsu Sorcerer managed to get sick & Yaga asks you to look after him. Will you & Gojo finally make it official?

Warnings ⋆ Smut, 18+ topics (MDNI), NSFW, flirty! gojo, grumpy! reader, rough, hate sex, condescending! gojo, cannon jjk world, younger gojo & geto.

Word Count ⋆ 2,492

I groan as I'm called into Yaga's office, taking a seat in front of his desk whilst I wait for him to 'bless' me with his presence. God I hate this old man, he thinks he's above everyone else. Such an ass. "Ah, (Y/N). I need a favour." Yaga says as he enters, his cold eyes narrowing down at me. "Hm?" I hummed, putting my hands on the back of my neck.

"I need you to watch over Satoru today. He's ill, and I don't need any unwanted visits." He slowly sat in his chair, his eyes dark, intently looking at me. I groaned, "Seriously old man? I have to babysit a grown man. Well, he is practically a man-child. He’s so insufferable." I spoke, my voice laced with annoyance. "Yes. Respect your elders (L/N)." He copied my annoyed tone. "Fine. Don't be surprised if he suddenly stops breathing." I stood up, "When do I have to go?" I raised an eyebrow.

"Now. Preferably until he's no longer ill." He states the obvious, I was just hoping I'd get some alone time first. I walk out the door and start taking slow but purposeful steps towards Satoru’s room. Satoru and I aren't... The best of acquaintances. Although it is mostly one sided, all he does is flirt with me and tease me. We've always been like that though, I've known him since birth.

You see, my eyes have a similar look to Satoru’s. It's quite infuriating since we're always matching, you know with the blindfold. The only difference in our eyes is that mine are green. I do really admire his looks though, he's extremely attractive don't get me wrong but... His personality pisses me off so much. He's the adult embodiment of a newborn child. He always acts immature, cracking silly jokes always at the wrong times, bragging about his abilities, his over-confidence. I hate it, but it's so attractive at the same time.

I have, basically the opposite abilities to him. I can warp reality, making physical laws meaningless, bypassing his infinity by rewriting the rules that govern his space. I also have a domain expansion that cancels out his abilities, well. I can totally control my domain expansion, as one of my abilities. I can decide what works and what doesn't, so simply putting Satoru in my domain expansion would render him useless. Although I have a few weaknesses.

…

Once I arrive at his door, I don't bother knocking and I just let myself in. I’m… familiar with his apartment, so I kick my shoes off at the door and head to his bedroom door, also letting myself in without a knock.

"Oh? (Y/N)? Missing me sweetheart?" He plasters a grin across his face as I shut the door behind me. I ignore his annoyingly attractive voice and look for a place to sit, his room is a mess. I take a seat on the edge of his desk chair and kick my shoes off. "Awww, are you here to take care of me." He pouts teasingly, I tilt my head backwards at him, folding my arms. "Yes. Orders from Yaga." I kick my legs up on his cluttered desk, turning my head back to the mirror sat ontop of the wooden surface. "Yaga." He tuts, "He's such a tease." He grins at me in the reflection of the mirror, his half naked body peaking through the covers.

I keep my eyes distracted, scanning the mess-ridden desk. I hate that I find him attractive, the thought of ever being with him genuinely drives me to jump off a bridge. "Come here gorgeous, you know I never have my Infinity on around you." He provokes me, pulling the covers over to create a space next to him. "No. You're ill. And frankly, I'd rather die." I lie through my teeth.

"Mm, that's not what you wanted last week." He teases, reminding me of last weeks events. We had a party, we got drunk and slept together. That was all. "We're adults. It was a one night stand." I retort, my mind preoccupied by the trash littered across his desk.

Satoru rolls his eyes, slipping further under the covers as he sinks deeper into his matress, "Don't wake me up." He grumpily tells me. "Wasn't planning on it." I mumble, reaching into my pocket to pull my phone out, kicking my legs off the desk and crossing them over each other.

…

He conked out for hours, snoring my ears to sleep until a rude banging filled my now awake ears. I turn my head to Satoru’s bed, he’s still snoozing. I close my eyes and let out a deep sigh before standing up from his desk chair, striding over to the door. My eyes meet his dark-brown orbs, “Oh thank god. I thought you were Yaga.” I sigh in relief, leaving the door open to let him follow me in. As I turn around suddenly, Satoru perks up. As if he’d been faking sleeping.

“There’s the patient.” Suguru chuckles a little, shutting the door behind him as he clambers over the messy floor to sit on the corner of Satoru’s bed. I look at him, “Can I go out for a bit? Is it ok to leave you to look after him… I can’t stand the sight of this room anymore.” I tap my foot on the floor as I wait for Suguru’s response. “Sure. I have somewhere to go in around an hour though, so don’t be too long.” He nods, reassuring me. “Aww, I’ll miss you.” Satoru winks at me. I scoff and shrug off his flirtatious behaviour, turning on my heels to the door instead.

…

I sluggishly lift my aching neck up, rubbing it as I look around the unfamiliar room. Oh yeah, I’m looking after Satoru. I turn my head back to his bed, he looks like he’s asleep. So I stand up and grab my airpods from my pocket, sticking one in my left ear to play my music. I look disappointedly at the floor, deciding to tidy his room up a little. I toss a few empty packets into a trash bag, rearranging some pieces of furniture and putting the clothes that were previously littered among the trash in the laundry. As I stood up, I felt a hard wall collide with my back, I knit my eyebrows together before feeling two hands slither around my waist. “Cleaning up? You’re not a butler.” He tells me as he lazily presses his chin against the top of my scalp. I press my head back, his chin falling to my forehead before he turns down at me, “Tired, love?” He coos, his breath brushing against my skin as his fingers squeeze my hips.

I sigh, lifting my head and readjusting the airpod in my ear. “Can I listen?” He tilts his head at me. I hesitate, “Fine.” I hum, as he slides his hands off my waist. He acts like we’re a goddamn couple sometimes. I fish in my pocket for my airpods, handing him the right-ear one. He smirks in approval and leaves the bedroom, dismissing himself to the bathroom temporarily. I’m assuming he brushed his teeth or something. Once he re-enters the room, he sluggishly climbs back into his bed and looks over at his desk, his eyes scanning my body. “Will you get in the bed with me now?” I think he’s asking, but it sounds more like a command. And to be honest, I’m way too sleepy to argue with him.

I sigh and look at him, kicking my legs off the desk chair. I crawl up his bed and into the sheets. "Ok. Now shut up." I said and leaned against the headboard, just like he was. I feel too vulnerable around him, I fucking hate it. He makes me feel weak. "Oh there's those pretty eyes." He grinned, ignoring my comment on his room, leaning his hand up, slipping my jaw inbetween his thumb and pointer finger.

This is the exact reason why Yaga needs to stop pairing us to do things together.

He grabs my waist, gripping it tightly as his mouth dominates mine. I have a feeling he was just lying about being sick, just as a ruse to get me in his bed. "I've been thinking about you all week." He groaned into the kiss, his hand slipping to my thigh and pulling it over him. I feel his erection on my leg, that's when my mind goes completely blurred, fuck his cock is so big, almost too big.

I give in to all of my instincts and climb on top of him, straddling his hips as he kissed me. He drops his other hand to my waist, firmly pressing me down to make sure I feel his hard-on. He smirks on my lips, bucking his hips into mine slightly. I whimper quietly, his tongue exploring every corner of my mouth.

His hand slides up to my back as he flips us over, pinning me to the bed. "Do you want me, baby girl?" He pulls away from our kiss, a string of saliva lingers between our mouths as he presses his forehead against mine. "Mm, you know I do, Satoru~" I seductively whisper his name, that seems to fuel him.

He reconnects our lips as his fingers fiddle with my shirt, yanking it off me in one swift motion. Then, his fingers press on the waistband of my pants. "I want you to beg for me, (Y/N)." He pulls his mouth off mine. "Behave yourself. Just fuck me already, Satoru." I bite my lip up at him, leaning my face to catch his bottom lip between my teeth. His lips curl into a smirk between my teeth, his hand sliding up from my waist to my neck, wrapping his long fingers around it.

Frankly, I have no idea what I'm doing or saying right now. This goes against everything I agreed to myself. And, we both still have our airpods in. Coincidentally, Monster, by Lady Gaga is playing. I smirk up at him as my eyes travel down his mostly-naked body. His white, Calvin Kleins hanging loosely on his hips as his outline becomes clearly visible.

"Mm, Satoru~ please… Please fuck me." I hum, his eyes darken as he looks down at me. He moves back and pulls my pants off, his fingers reaching for my panties. He slips his fingers in my underwear, gliding them over my core, "Mm, you're all wet for me baby." He hums, pressing his fingers inbetween my slick folds, slipping the tip of his middle finger into my hole. I whimper quietly, watching him as he pleasures me gently. He pulls his fingers out and grabs the elastic of my panties, pulling them off.

He smirks and looks down at my naked body, "Ah. Look at you, all pretty & ready for me." He teases, moving back over me. His bare chest presses on mine as he connects our lips again, I smirk and lift my legs, wrapping them around his waist and pulling him into me, his cock pressing on my pussy. "Ah~, fuck (Y/N)." He moans into my lips, his hand reaching down to his boxers. He pulls them down, grabbing his lengthy dick. He rubs his tip against my wetness, groaning into my mouth as he does. "You gonna take my cock like a good girl?" He pulls away from the kiss, looking down at me. I bite my lip and nod, spreading my legs further to give him better access.

He licks his lips, "Mm, I wanna watch your pretty little face as I fuck you." He tells me before pushing his full length into my hole. My eyes flutter, digging my nails into his back as he starts thrusting into me, at a rough pace. The sound of the headboard slamming on the wall, my moans and our skin smacking against each other fills the room, my back arching with each thrust. "Mm fuck, it's like your pussy was made for me." He grunts as he keeps his pace, roughly slamming into me.

After a few more thrusts I feel his dick throb inside of me, leaking out precum as I clench my walls on his length, my whimpers getting louder. He groans in pleasure, before he slides his hand up to my face, slipping his fingers into my mouth. "Not too loud, gorgeous." I roughly suck on his fingers they slip down my throat, his lewd groans burn in my ears as he reaches his climax. His abs tense as he comes to his orgasm, he slips his dick out of me and jerks it slowly, his seed releasing on my lower stomach in thick rope as I finish with him, his name rolling off my tongue in a whimper.

After a few more heavy breaths he stands up, pulling his boxers back up before disappearing into the bathroom. In an attempt to regain my composure, I begin to steady my breathing, closing my legs. He returns a couple seconds later, with some wet tissue, "Wanna know a secret?" He asks me as he presses the tissue on my stomach.

"Mm?" I raise an eyebrow at him.

"I'm not sick.”

dividers by @/cafekitsune

[synthaphone]

I love how Neopets draws water (ie. water PB pets) but when I try to copy them it always looks weird, do you have any advice on replicating it?

ooh, let me see- i've only ever tried to replicate it once, with the Water Centibyte:

my favorite water pets are the Kyrii and the Zafara, so those two were the ones I referenced most heavily when I was designing this!

I apologize in advance for not necessarily knowing how best to describe this, but in short, I think I'd recommend

laying down a base gradient for darker areas that you can then add hand-painted caustic detail over on a different layer

make extremities that you'd want to be clearly visible lighter/higher contrast (The Zafara and Kyrii both have lighter colored hands and feet, light colored tails and hair, and faces where you can make out the eyes and facial expression due to having contrasting areas of light and dark next to each other. I find it helpful sometimes to squint at what I'm working on to see if I can still roughly make out its shape, vs everything turning into a same colored blob)

consider keeping thinner pieces of a design like 'sheets' of hair lighter, and maybe visibly darker spots where you'd realistically 'see through' the sheet of water

Honestly I mostly was winging it + heavily referencing those two pets, but looking at irl photos of pools and ocean waves would probably be a good idea too- you can sort of build up a sense memory for how light interacts with water, that can make it easier to stylize or 'cheat' it.

If you want my long attempt to remember wtf my process was for the Centibyte in particular, i've put it under the cut :)

Water is a color that's pretty reliant on gradients, and where the shading and detail work on top of that base gradient really make it shine. Both of my reference pets have their darkest area around their neck and shoulders, and get lighter towards their extremities, so the first thing I did (after making my lineart edits to the hair to get the splashy effect, and recoloring the eyes to match the Kyrii and Zafara) was lay down some base gradients.

I believe i used the gradient tool first to establish main dark-to-light gradient from the head to the feet, and then later went in with a lasso tool to add smaller gradients to the ends of the arms, and probably used the soft brush to add that lighter marking to the face and to make the feet even lighter. (The belly marking I add later will cover up that jaggedy spot on the belly, so it didn't matter that it looks weird)

After that, I added simple gradients to the shell and belly markings too:

I have these on separate layers already, so it was relatively simple to lock the layers and throw more gradients over them.

After that I seem to have started to add stylized water caustic effects!

Note that I'm extremely inexperienced at painting or rendering water, so I was just sort of eyeballing how it looked on the two pets I was referencing, in addition to considering what looked good to me. I used a couple different low opacity multiply layers to do the darker markings on the body and the belly, and a 100% opaque normal layer to paint the lighter markings onto the feet (which also have a gradient on them, so that they'd match the gradient they were being drawn on top of)

After that I... seem to have just gone buckwild and started painting shit with the opaque hard brush.

I mimicked the hands on the Zafara being a less green shade of blue, and sort of gradiated that color out manually by painting on the lighter colors with a few blobby splashes and caustic patterns to make them feel blended. (I don't think anything I painted on these layers has an actual gradient, soft shading, or lowered opacity). I also added lighter outlines and a few bright white highlights to the arms, to give them that shiny jelly-like effect.

For the belly, I also just kind of went wild painting more caustic patterns- my main goal was feeling acceptably "watery" while also keeping the basic shape of the belly marking distinct from the background. The lighter blue marking in the middle of the belly (and at the bottom of it) is supposed to be underlighting that's reflecting back up.

For the lighter splashy 'hair' parts of the design, I tried to focus on getting the basic background colors in before worrying too much about where the highlights would go, knowing I could do those on a different layer afterwards. I tried to use the darkest blues at the spots where the curved hair shapes overlap each other, and also copied the head colors for the parts of the mohawk that would be thin and overlap the darker shell of the head.

I decided to sort of transition that darker shell part out 'early' instead of following it all the way through to that back antenna, so that the hair would stand out from the shell, and also because the antenna gets further away in perspective as it extends past the head.

Then I threw on a shadow layer for the shell, and then (confusingly) I made another layer on top where I added highlights AND obscured the last two segments of the tail and the knees with gradient layers. I think I felt that they didn't feel 'water' enough?

I added highlights and additional caustics for those elements on another layer afterward, with another opaque layer:

Then we have the spots and stripes markings + area specific colored lineart:

Aaaand some causticy-wavey lighting for the hair + blending of the head antennas into their hair, because it felt very abrupt for Water:

For the 'hair' highlights, I used a mix of pure white and very light blue- I probably could have made my life easier by doing a gradient on these areas, but for whatever reason I hand painted them. You'll notice in close ups that it can look a little sloppy, but if it looks decent at the size you intend the piece to be viewed at, this doesn't really matter.

And that's the finished piece! (identical to the one above, i just hid the refs)

No idea if this will be helpful, but I hope its at the very least interesting!! I viewed a lot of the more difficult Centibyte colors as challenges and puzzles to solve- its fun trying to reverse engineer very specific aesthetics I'd never tried to tackle before. I wish you luck and hope you have fun in the future with your watery neopets endeavors!!!

[moonlightsylph]

Emergency Commissions

tl;dr, I was in a car accident. I need help to get it back on the road if possible as my insurance isn't going to cover it. I don't know the total cost yet, will update once I do, but I'm going to set a starting goal as of now. Longer explanation and details below the read-more

This will be a Pay-as-you-Want through Ko-fi

kofi: https://ko-fi.com/moonlightsylph

----

Basics

This is the starting point, where you pick the level of what you want. From sketch (basic blocking out and concept, typically will be done in traditional pencil) to full (shading and rendering)

Sketch- pay-as-you-want (done traditionally, in pencil, before scanned/photographed to be resized and uploaded. Can also be done as digital line if preferred) Lines- pay-as-you-want (Digitally, Unless specified. If traditional, it will be done in ink. It will be scanned/photographed before resizing) Flats- pay-as-you-want (Digitally, Unless specified. If traditional, we can discuss materials wanted. It will be scanned/photographed before resizing) Full- pay-as-you-want (Digitally, Unless specified. If traditional, we can discuss materials wanted. It will be scanned/photographed before resizing)

Examples

Traditional Only: Flairs. This will be done in gold and/or silver pen to add flourishes

eaxmples:

----

Background

Backround options. Simple (for me is either a solid background or a gradient. I pick the colours for this one unless you have requests.) to Basic detail (being in a room, set-dressing for the character, ect) to Complex (fighting scene, detailed background like cityscapes or nature scenes. Here you have more control on what exactly you want, instead of a generalized idea. I will complete this to the best of my ability)

Simple background- free Basic detail- pay-as-you-want Complex scenes- pay-as-you-want

Example:

----

Style

Here is where we get a little creative. I've toyed with different styles and challenges. For limited pallets, you can provide me with a colour pallet you want to see me transform into your character, or I can generate a few for you to pick from.

As for the Random Blorbo, this is a fun challenge I wish to do where I build you a new character. You can give me a few details you want seen, otherwise its completely up in the air what you get.

Lineless- pay-as-you-want Limited pallets- pay-as-you-want Chibi- pay-as-you-want Random blorbo machine- pay-as-you-want [comes with two-three head shots and one full body]

Examples:

----

Fun Stuff

For this section, you can have custom borders done for your personal use. Be it for framing a picture you like, to spruce up your page or blog, or to frame up a personal project you have going (example: making your own tcg, tarot card, ect)

As for the cards, this is where I create a card featuring one of your characters each. Like a tcg or a tarot, or whichever you want to see.

Ref sheets are pretty straight forward. I'll provide two-three headshots + full body + interesting facts you want included. This also included, if you wish it, personal items said character may have to showcase.

Custom borders- pay-as-you-want Cards- pay-as-you-want Ref sheets- pay-as-you-want

Avatars: pay-as-you-want

Examples:

Hello,

I know this is out of the blue, but when things happen they don't give you a forewarning.

I was involved in a car accident yesterday. Fresh with a new N, only had my car for a week to myself, I found myself hydroplaning into a traffic control post and side-swiping a car in the process.

Thankfully, they got off with cosmetic damage and a cracked tail-light as i avoided rear-ending them.

Myself, however, ended up with a banged bumper, a passenger mirror nearly beheaded and a crack radiator. Lucky, considering what could have happened, but still terrifying.

It was after this i learned that my insurance wouldn't cover the collision, meaning I'd have to cover everything out of pocket. Money I don't really have at the moment. Not with the other debts I've been steadily paying off.

I don't know the grand total yet, I'm still waiting for my car to be released so I can take it to a body shop. But from how expensive cars can be, with some insight from those around me, I can make a good guess at a "starting" amount. I'll update the total once I know though.

But I'm now asking for help. I don't expect anything for free, I will be making things in exchange. I've wanted to open commissions for a while, its just sad that what made me finally pull the trigger is when I'm in trouble. I'll link my kofi, the prices will be set to pay-as-you-want. I'll work out details for what people want, and I'll have a list of things I don't think I can do.

But I appreciate that you took the time to read this. Any help will be greatly appreciated and even if you can't, please share. If you just want to donate and not get a work in exchange, just say so in the notes. (that said, you might end up with a doodle anyways as thank you <3)

[nimadjart]

Happy halloweeen. :)

This is the commentary track(?) to my digitober. It's just rambling, so don't expect anything too interesting.

This first picture came out on a whim, I originally didn't intend to do anything for this october. I had just arrived home from helping my mom out with something, and was in a good mood. I think this picture, as sketchy as it looks, reflects that feeling. I'm content with it - and it's halloween themed! All the better.

For the second, I tried to follow the "official inktober" list (something I'd drop quickly in the following days). I'm disastrous at making backgrounds, so I gave it a shot for practice sake. I think it's not a bad result, it almost kinda tells something of a story.

"Boots", hah. It's not terrible, but it's also missing a lot of polish. I think the idea behind it works well for a cute/sexy picture of Angewomon. Maybe some day I'll revisit it? I should put more practice into drawing the human form in the meanwhile lol.

I really dislike the fourth one. I think Lianpunmon deserves better art, so I'll definitely do it again some day. My skills are so undeveloped, it's very obvious seeing this poor hatching.

Speaking of hatching, I bit more than I can chew with this one. The composition isn't interesting enough either, and just like with Lianpunmon there's no story here. At least Angewomon seemed to be interacting with the viewer lol.

The sixth is something I liked better. It's kinda shody, but there's something of an urban fantasy thing going on.

The Vamdemon one I can see the faults: I need better line control, the shapes aren't locked in as well as they should be. Yet, I'm partial to it…

Rapidmon deserves better lol. I still really dig the idea behind this drawing, I just wish I'd have given myself the patience and time needed to render a kickass explosion.

SkullGreymon, I have little to comment. It has zero story, but it's carried by the vibes. It's the first (and arguably last lmao) time I think I was cooking with the halftones.

The tenth is arguably the peak of the entire month. It has some story, a neat composition, and acceptable execution. Strangely enough it was one of the quickest to make: I had an idea, and it came out in a few minutes (compared to some other drawings where I was fighting for my life), and it ultimately was one of the most interacted with drawings in my entire blog. Funny how that goes.

I like a lot the Piemon one, as bland as it is. It's like a design piece, more than a drawing. It helps that the perspective deformation hides my poor linework haha.

I went too hard on the Mephismon X one, to the detriment of the piece. Instead of adding texture, it just looks dirty. Damn.

The thirteenth one was my poor attempt at making a background. Originally, Bakemon was gonna have this devious, whimsical look, but as I finished drawing the stairs I thought "I'd be kinda tired after climbing a few floors", so I changed Bakemon's expression to reflect that. Just a little trivia.

The Jesmon is what I'd argue was my peak. Shapes are locked (as best as my skill lets them), values worked well, it told a story. It's my favourite of the month.

Fiftenth was made, mostly, trying to catch some Adventure buff to the ammount of interactions I'd get. I mean, I had fun drawing the characters, but the reality is that I had petty reasons. I don't dislike it though.

I know exactly what I wanted to do with the sixteenth, and I didn't achieve it. Looking back, I think I should've done it in BW, rather than grayscale, to make it pop more. Fix the composition too. It's too plain. Shame, I really like Lilithmon X's design.

Seventeenth was also one where I just phoned it in. I think the values are all over the place; though I do like the harsh light. Impmon is a lot of fun to draw, all things considered.

Greymon was fun, lots of fun to draw. But this was another piece where I went too crazy trying to use halftones, I ended up making something that lacked impact or presence. I do like, in a self deprecating way, how the background seems okay until you look at it directly and see that it's kinda bad lol.

I made Nefertimon's torso too long! I only realized when I was doing the finishing touches lol. Yet I like the whole thing a lot, I think the texture and lightning kinda sells it as a photo (the white border was an attempt at selling that further). Saw someone refer to it as "the last thing I see before I die", and that comment might stay with me forever lol.

The twentieth is another I had a clear picture in my head as to what I was actually hoping to make, but failed to. Instead of landing some sort of finish, it's on a weird gray (lol) area. Making clouds is hard y'all.

Twenty one is one where I managed to stick the landing to what I had in mind. I think the composition needed a few more minutes of baking, but overall I'm content with the result. Death-X-DORUgoramon is a complex design, so any degree of succesful translation is a win in my book.

I think I needed to draw some more background Kuramon for the twenty second. Y'know, to really sell the swarm thing. It's kinda too clean.

Before twenty three, I had never given myself the time to draw a tree shilouette. It was fun to turn off my brainfor a bit and just draw line, after line, after line, after line. I did the tree first, and then I tried to figure out how to make Shurimon. Originally, I wanted him to be hunched over more dramatically, almost as if he was climbing down the tree, but I was incapable of drawing it in a satisfactory manner. So this is what I got.

Twenty four is so bad! I think Monitamon came out fine, but the background elements are so poorly done! I'm so embarrassed! lol

Kabuterimon was really fun, very dramatic looking. I think it has some serious readability issues with the hands, but I don't dislike the idea I had at all.

Hackmon's drawing was done almost like a sibling piece to the fourteenth, Jesmon's. Like, Huckmon is somehow watching his exhausted future, yet he stands stoic. On it's own, I think it's plain. Like, it has some charm, but it's lacking in impact compared to the fourteenth. But maybe that's for the best of the story?

The Wizarmon sticker came through me realizing I wasn't practicing my lineart! So I did a sticker instead. This was actually version two, but number one was so bad I had to redo it. Despite it being a humble sticker chibi, it's overall the day I spent the most time drawing.

Twenty eight came from me realizing I hadn't done any Alphamon! So I did what I thought would look badass. As much as I like Alphamon, though, his shapes are difficult for me to grasp so it came out shoddy and weak lol.

Twenty nine, Ragna Lordmon vs Ragnamon, was hurt by me recording it. While an exciting thing to do, I felt like I wasn't allowed to do anything but move forward quickly, or to change things (I'd have moved both Ragnamon and the main Ragna Lordmon body closer to the center) that would've made the composition flow better. It's not an abject failure, and the video is fun to watch, but still…

Dorumon is a simple piece that I was a bit surprised to make. My birthday is not information I tell people, but I was just compelled to share a bit of myself. I dunno, it feels weird. I'm weird. It came out cute at least.

And at the last! Noble Pumpmon again. I'd love to tell you that I applied everything I learned throughout the month and it's my best piece and stuff, but that isn't the reality. It's a better show for a similar amount of effort compared to the October 1st drawing, but it's not some crazy good display of betterment. A bit, yes, but less than I had hoped.

If you made it this far into this silly wall of text I wrote, I thank you. I thank everyone who interacted with my drawings, it pleases me a lot to see that someone gave it a like, or a share, or a comment. I learned about myself, and my limits, through this experience. It was tiring, but setting myself the goal of "make a drawing a day" was, paradoxically, liberating. Like, now I had a reason to draw! (despite me having some comission work to do lmfao). It was nice. This was one of the most entertaining octobers in recent years. Thanks again to everyone who participated in some fashion.

[ofgeography]

Hi Molly! Congrats on your book and all of the exciting stuff happening in your corner; long-time listener/first-time caller here, it is fantastic to see you putting art of all kinds out into the world. If you're at all inclined, would you be willing to talk a little about how you got into the studio to record your albums? How did you choose your producer or studio/what was the process working with studio musicians like? How fleshed out were the demos that you brought in, in terms of instrumentation/polish/etc.? I'm very curious, as I'm slowly amassing songs I'd like to record, but have no idea where to start/what to expect. Thanks!!!

hello my sweet! i'm happy to talk about this, although i'm not sure how replicable my ~process is.

i originally started recording because at my mom's house, whenever she has a party, it almost always devolves into everybody playing music and messing around. and at one of these, my mom's friend john, who is a professional musician (slash deep-sea fisherman), was like, hey you're actually pretty good do you want me to introduce you to a producer i know who lives on the island (my mom lives on an island). and i was like.....sure. so in terms of "choosing" a studio or a producer i don't have any good insight for you because i was just like. introduced to a man named greg, who i happened to vibe with super well and everything just kind of worked out.

that being said! there are a ton of websites where you can put in your location and pick from profiles; the one i think has the best rep is SoundBetter.

most of my songs were pretty fleshed out, in terms of lyrics/melody/structure, and i worked with greg to be like, okay, now that i can hire people to do stuff, what would i want to build this song into? (for example, mile magnificent has an accordion in it. i do not play the accordion.) plus, i am good enough at the instruments that i play that i can make myself a demo that's like ... "this is how i want the song to go, and the vibe i'm looking for," but i certainly can't shred on guitar or whatever, so most of the songs (except a couple) i hired a guitarist to play it. or made my brother do it, because he's a very gifted instrumentalist (bastard).

but there were certainly bits where i was like, "i like the meat of this song but i don't love what i'm doing on the bridge" or whatever, and then it was a matter of messing around in the studio to figure out what worked better.

this also means there's songs where i'm sharing songwriting credit with (for example) greg, because he meaningfully contributed to changing something about the song. that's something we worked out based on vibes after the fact, but don't do that. that worked out for me but it's not like. an actual process you should follow. you should be clear with the person you're working with and they should be clear with you.

really the number one thing i think probably is important is you find someone to work with who you like. you could have, idk, jack antonoff or whatever, but if you guys don't vibe, it's going to be a bad experience, and you're probably not going to end up with music that feels authentic to you. so that's what i'd say in terms of choice.

final thing: i don't have a record label, which means that i paid for all of my music. greg very sweetly didn't charge me for studio time, but most people probably will, plus for whatever services they're rendering (musicians, mastering, production, etc etc). it's a sliding scale of cost, but obviously the harder you go the bigger the expense. i want to be transparent about that. i was able to pay to play because i was able to pay to play.

recording in a studio with a producer is one way to do it but it's an expensive way if you don't have a label (and even, frankly, if you DO have a label). and you don't make a lot of money streaming, so it's income you probably won't get back (unless you blow up!). i would say i make between $200 - $400 from streaming, every ... few months? and don't get me wrong, that's great, i'm very grateful! but the cost going in was like. $9k (about $3k per album). so given all of my streams, which is more than 2 million, even using the highest streaming revenue it took me 2 years to make back.

if that's not possible for you, there are TONS of ways you can do it yourself. it won't be the same experience! but the product can end up just as great, and honestly sometimes better. for example there's stuff like:

soundtrap (probably the best non-Logic Pro track builder, not free though)

audacity (no-frills, but free)

cakewalk (free! and very intuitive.)

all of these can help you record yourself. and sure, you CAN buy all the fancy microphones and stuff, but frankly, you don't have to. iphones & computers etc have gotten to the point where you can do really good work with just those. so i don't want the money stuff to discourage you, i just want you to go in with your eyes open.

i hope this helps!!!

[holymolyfizzie]

i don't wanna derail @kityana's post about stolas's pill popping, so i'm making a separate one. but something kityana said finally made me think about something: "i'm still not sure if those pills are actually helping him or if they were just given to him to numb him to how shitty his life is"

I've wondered something related to this a lot myself. but Stolas takes his antidepressants with alcohol (and in the aftermath of alcohol, like at the end of The Circus), which is a depressant. taking antidepressants + alcohol at best just cancels out your antidepressants so they don't actually do anything. but both at once, at worst, makes your depression symptoms a lot worse. taking them together is the sort of stuff that college girls get yelled at for, but i guess no one told stolas. i wouldn't be surprised if he's been popping them like candy and upping his dosage because he was told they would help him…and then they don't because of the rampant alcoholism. which is to say that we don't know if the meds even worked for him at all (i'd argue strongly they didn't, considering his alcoholism only ever got worse and he kept taking more and more pills, like they never worked enough) or if they were a placebo while he was taking them

and this might be a bit too nuanced for such a show, but as someone who has suddenly gotten off antidepressants that didn't work at all, the withdrawal symptoms don't always affect mood that much (they did nothing for it to begin with) and they sure as hell don't last a full month after getting off. in fact, going cold turkey off of meds that do work for you shouldn't have withdrawal symptoms that last a full month (if you do, it's a Talk to Your Doctor moment). i just really wonder if Stolas noticed the lack of antidepressants after the first few days beyond the old habit of taking them, and if we really can contribute much of his mental breakdown to getting off antidepressants

but you know what he was taking religiously, that did affect him for sure, and that we haven't seen him touch in a month now? the alcohol. he was drinking during Mastermind, but he clearly hasn't touched it since the trial. Blitz doesn't seem to have alcohol around, and Stolas wouldn't ask for the extra expense -- he's being forced to quit. he passes up Loona's beelzejuice at the Sinsmas party, noticeably. the beelzejuice is brought in, and Stolas immediately goes outside for a smoke instead. he's not drinking anymore. and quitting alcohol cold turkey is an insane process, esp at his level of hard liquor. we're talking about disastrous health consequences and a whole host of withdrawal symptoms -- anxiety, depression, irritability, fatigue, loss of appetite, brain fog, hallucinations, and much worse stuff (in humans, seizures). it's impossible to underestimate the severe damage alcoholism does to your brain and body longterm. and a lot of those withdrawal symptoms stay weeks after stopping cold turkey

like, i don't want to detract from him going off of antidepressants; he needs and obviously wants working antidepressants, he's desperate for them. but i'm gonna be so for real, i've had my experiences going off ineffective antidepressants, and i've watched family members try to quit alcohol. an alcoholic quitting is a brutal, drawn out process that shakes me to my core. there are reasons a person still says "i am an alcoholic" even a decade after quitting. that shit's insidious in a way that antidepressants aren't, and it was affecting stolas noticeably more, surely enough to render his meds useless. if you want him back on antidepressants, then you need a sober Stolas first, and this is what he's FINALLY working on

so i think more emphasis needs to be placed on Stolas's recovery from alcoholism when discussing his mental breakdown, irritability, etc. the fact that he's doing this without rehab or other interventions is miraculous, nearly impossible. i don't want his impressive recovery (so far) from alcoholism to end up getting buried under the antidepressant talk ngl, especially when his getting off of alcohol now means that his antidepressants may actually work in the future and help him. this is something to be so so proud of!!

[weaselandfriends]

The Making Of: Fargo

Today, May 4 2025, is the tenth anniversary of when I started Fargo! To celebrate, here is a behind-the-scenes/retrospective on the work. Enjoy!

I. This Is Your Brain On Anime

I started writing Fargo at the lowest point in my life. I'd been watching anime.

For years, I'd managed to not watch anime. Sure, there was Pokémon as a kid, and to a lesser extent Digimon and Yu-Gi-Oh. And as a preteen cinephile who followed the Oscars, Spirited Away's Best Animated win got me to pick it up on DVD. I'd later seen a handful of anime films that similarly carried cinephile credibility: other Miyazakis (Nausicaä, Princess Mononoke), Akira, Ghost in the Shell, Paprika. But I had always refused to watch anime anime. You know what I mean. The seasonal stuff.

In 2007, the final fringe of Wild West internet before Facebook changed everything, seasonal anime was exploding in popularity. A lot of this was due to sheer accessibility. No longer did you need to find a VHS release of some OVA or hope for a play on Adult Swim. Fan subbing and dubbing communities rendered more-or-less anything showing up in Japan available to worldwide audiences via a nifty new site called YouTube. This level of immediacy, combined with the niche tight-knit communities that governed the internet prior to social media, made following seasonal anime a social event. Week by week people posted reactions, reviews, theories, and memes, driving up engagement and rapidly expanding anime's reach as an entertainment medium.

The big breakthrough title in this regard is 2006's The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya, a massively influential show that changed the look and feel of mainstream anime for years. But my first brush with the anime community came via the following year's Lucky Star, by the same studio and with the same moe stylings. As I prowled the boards of Nintendo's official forum, Nsider, and its successor Nsider 2 (after Nintendo, in characteristically Nintendo fashion, annihilated the site from existence without warning), I found myself constantly bumping into people posting pictures of these four hyper-cutesy anime girls with candy-colored hair. They were everywhere. Teenage me took one look and came to an unshakeable and incontrovertible conclusion:

Only girls would watch this!

Saccharine aesthetic? Lack of plot? And, god, all of the characters are girls? Girl show. No doubt in my mind. Nah, none of this "anime" crap for me. I'll stick with real media, like Leprechaun 4: In Space (which I eagerly stayed up until midnight to watch on the SciFi Channel) and Eli Roth's splatterhouse classic Cabin Fever.

Then some devious motherfucker, I don't even remember who they were, told me something truly insidious, something that would haunt me for years to come. "Hey," they said, "what if there was a show like Lucky Star except they all killed each other with knives? Wouldn't that be awesome?"

And they recommended me Higurashi no Naku Koro ni.

(They showed me an AMV with a similar feel to this one to entice me. Unfortunately that original AMV is lost to history.)

I wound up bingeing the entire 50-episode show, in 10-minute chunks on YouTube, across a single 24-hour period. I couldn't stop myself. It was the same obsessive consumption that would infest me when I discovered Homestuck five years later. Obsession so intense that after I finished it, I immediately went crawling in search of more anime and devoured Death Note in another 24-hour span.

Emerging, blinking, back into the sun, I looked around and realized I couldn't go on like this. I couldn't plunge headlong, headless, into anime. I could not become the dreaded "weeb."

So I cut off anime. No more. As quickly as my drop into the abyss began, I ended it. And a few years later, when I went to college, I cut off the internet as a social experience altogether. No more forums, no more chatrooms. I was an adult. Time to do adult stuff, like read classic literature, write novels, and play League of Legends for 10 hours every day.

Despite how it sounds, college was a great time in my life. I enjoyed learning, enjoyed going to classes, enjoyed reading textbooks, enjoyed writing essays. And I was good at it, very very good—even with the 10-hour League sessions. I felt no need to reconsider anime.

Then I graduated.

Graduating college was like slamming face-first into a brick wall. My entire life until then had seemed to be building toward something. Academia is a series of stepping stones to more prestigious levels of academia (middle school! high school! college!) with a golden gleaming Adulthood at the end of the line, omnipresent. And I did it! My success in college got me a job, eight hours in an office five days a week, much better than anyone else in my post-recession cohort. Adulthood accomplished.

It was miserable. That gleaming paradise Adulthood was a sham. I was doing less work and less difficult work than at college but they were demanding I spend way more time doing it. All sense of fulfilment vanished. There was no longer progress, no bigger and better things on the horizon. I had nothing to hope for. I'd achieved the thing people tend to hope for, and THIS WAS IT. The notion that consumed me was that my life had slipped into overtime, a dead zone past its expiration date, treading water in misery. I also had a 90-minute daily commute in SoCal traffic.

My free time was cut down to a fraction of what it was in college, so no more 10-hour League sessions. I tried to maintain my schedule of reading 50 pages and writing 2,000 words a day, but I no longer had the time or energy, and it didn't make sense why I didn't have the time or energy, because I was doing things that were so trivial and easy compared to my college courseload. Work was an arbitrary time-wasting machine with nothing ahead except 40 more years of work. I wanted to die.

Despairing, seeking nothing save relief, I turned back to anime.

In a Skype groupchat I wound up in, there were two teenagers with their fingers on the pulse of the latest anime buzz. They were my guides back into this wretched world. First, I was served up Fate/Zero, which I consumed quickly (though not with the same leisure time to afford a 24-hour binge) before asking for seconds. I was then recommended Angel Beats. Okay, I said, typing Angel Beats into YouTube, which seven years after Higurashi I still assumed was the main way to watch anime. The first result I got was called Bludgeoning Angel Dokuro-chan. Aha, I said. Angel Beats, Bludgeoning Angel, I know what this is. It's an alternate translation of the title.

It's the kind of comedy of errors that could only happen to someone who timewarped directly from 2007 to 2014 with complete ignorance of the intervening years. Angel Beats, of course, is a tearjerking Key show about students in the afterlife coming to grips with their tragic deaths. Bludgeoning Angel Dokuro-chan is about an angel repeatedly bludgeoning a boy because otherwise he will grow up and create a world where every woman stops aging at 10 years old—a so-called "Lolicon Paradise." (As someone who reads classic lit, seeing the bizarre cross-cultural route Nabokov's novel has taken always amuses me.)

When I started Bludgeoning Angel, I was a little uncertain whether I had the right show. Its tone didn't quite jive with Bingus and Bungus in the Skype chat. Hesitantly, I decided to react in chat to the first thing that happens in the show. "Haha," I said. "The angel really just killed that guy."

In a sadistic twist of fate, this is somehow exactly how Angel Beats begins, too. My friends responded as though everything was total normal, and I figured I must have the right show after all. Thus, I wound up watching the entirety of Bludgeoning Angel Dokuro-chan, which becomes increasingly surreal, violent, and depraved as it goes on, and only learned my mistake after the final episode. That show probably tainted me forever.

Afterward, I watched the real Angel Beats (in my depressive stupor, it made me cry), Mirai Nikki, and the "only for girls" Lucky Star (it also made me cry). I was getting hooked. It was only a matter of time before Bingus and Bungus recommended me a true landmine. They did. "I think you might like this," Bungus said, tepidly, not exactly sure.

"Hit me," I said.

II. Puella Magi Madoka Magica

The League of Legends-induced timewarp that imprisoned me in college had the side effect of allowing me, in early 2015, to watch Puella Magi Madoka Magica completely blind. I hadn't the faintest idea what it was about, or even a hint of its reputation. Bungus said, "Watch it," and I watched it.

Believe it or not, this blindness backfired. Despite the sanctity people place on spoilers, expectations are a crucial component of the narrative experience. Unaware of what I was watching, I was not nearly as impacted by what I saw. The much-famed Episode 3 twist was nothing to me. Why? I was certain, absolutely certain, the death wouldn't stick. I felt extremely confident either Madoka or Sayaka would make a wish to bring Mami back to life.

Nonetheless, the show grew on me. The cute exterior steadily transforming grimmer was a Ratatouille flashback to Higurashi; there's something so delicious about how jaggedly the hyper-poppy upbeat OP jumpscares in the middle of increasingly hopeless situations during the show's back half. After 12 episodes and a movie I needed more. Not more anime. More Madoka Magica.

I didn't get it from the spinoffs, of which there were several even then, most of which I knew nothing about. Instead I went looking for it on more familiar terrain, another relic of my 2007 timewarp: fanfiction-dot-net. This is where people go to engage with media fandom, right? I hit up the Madoka page, sorted content by number of reviews, and got this:

Well, sort of. Fargo wasn't there yet, obviously. The other five were, in this same order. I opened To the Stars, read a chapter or two, found it impossibly boring and nothing at all like the show, and discarded it. Resonance Days, A Happy Dream, and cat's cradle [sic] all looked like shipfics, which was not my speed. That left one fic, which I would read in one day home sick (legitimately) from work, one fic that would prove massively influential on the idea for Fargo I didn't yet have.

Puella Magi Homura Magica by Lestaki, despite its second-place position on this prestigious list (behind only a work once described by acclaimed guy-with-a-blog Eliezer Yudkowsky as the most prescient depiction of future warfare ever written), is a fanfic I have never heard anyone mention once in my now 10-year stint in the Madoka Magica trenches. Even in the subculture it is a blank of memory, which makes sense if you look at its publication and last updated dates. It came out May 24, 2011—barely a month after the show finished airing—and was unceremoniously abandoned, incomplete, little over a year later. It's easy to see the fic emerging in the frenzy of activity prompted by the show's immediate popularity, rising on the tide, and vanishing under the waves of works with more temporally dogged creators.

So what is it?

PMHM is a three-arc story set after the show (and ignoring, of course, Rebellion, which it predates). Its first arc focuses on the three-man band of Homura, Kyoko, and Mami as they prepare to fight against a "demon prince"—an exceptionally powerful, city-destroying wraith—that Kyubey predicts will be born in Mitakihara soon. The demon prince is so powerful that the trio cannot possibly defeat it on their own, causing them to soon be joined by a ragtag team of original characters, spinoff characters, and a contracting Hitomi. The squad butts heads, but ultimately manages to come together to destroy the demon prince when it appears.

The second arc revolves around an inter-city magical girl war. The Mitakihara girls, for reasons I don't fully remember, have to invade and defeat an OC magical girl warlord in charge of another city. Both sides amass allies until the final confrontation involves at least a hundred magical girls. At the end of the arc, the OC villain reveals she manufactured the war to put Homura in a situation where she would be forced to continually use her time-rewinding powers to save Kyoko and Mami (whom she has come to care for over the course of the story), which is part of the villain's plot to generate enough karmic potential that she can create a new Madoka-esque god. Homura is aware that every time she rewinds time, she is helping the villain usurp Madoka, so she's torn between saving her living friends and saving her conceptual girlfriend.

That's where the story abruptly ends, mired in a series of repetitive chapters where the villain keeps finding ways to kill Kyoko and/or Mami and forcing Homura to turn back time. (It seems the author trapped themselves in the concept of showing each timeline in detail and lost momentum fast.)

And that's where Fargo begins.

III. Williston

Fargo was not a conscious work. Unlike most of my fiction, it was not assiduously planned. It was not kicked around in my head for years before I started writing it. It was not drafted and redrafted. Fargo was a creature of instinct, and because of that even now I look at it with a certain sense of wonder. Both Chicago and Cleveland Quixotic originated with me examining Fargo, trying to see what made it so popular, and laboriously reengineering whatever I concluded was the cause (I was wrong both times).

It emerged in my head not as an idea, but a vibe. Frigid, frostbitten wasteland. A tough, take-no-bullshit magical girl, dead inside. She'd use a Gatling gun. Long brown coat.

I was 60,000 words into a draft of a story I'd been planning since I first read Homestuck in 2012, a story I was tentatively calling Soulstealer but would eventually call Modern Cannibals. But I didn't want to write it anymore. At work, I was still miserable. I wanted to write a work of misery. I wanted to write a miserable human being. I abandoned the Modern Cannibals draft despite how far along it was (I was at the scene where Z. rescues Kiki from Mitchum's party). I began, as if automatically, writing something else. It was the same surrender that had led me to anime in the first place. The path of emotional, intellectual least resistance.

It's probably because I was on this path that I wound up unconsciously borrowing so many structural and worldbuilding cues from Puella Magi Homura Magica, especially in the first arc, with the Williston archon substituted for the Mitakihara demon prince. It wasn't even a conscious decision to do what I had seen in PMHM; I didn't realize the overlap until later. I was putting onto page the last thing lodged in my brain, and that was it. At work, I'd recently learned about the homeless crisis in Williston due to the shale oil boom, and that wound up in the story too.

Basically every part of the first few chapters of Fargo manifested on the page without me having any idea what it would build to. When Kyubey told Sloan to go to Williston, I knew he was being deceptive, but I didn't know how, and certainly had not figured out his elaborate plot to defeat Homura yet. Ditto Omaha. Clair Ibsen as Sloan's detested rival was a name I flicked onto the page at random (combining Clair, the gym leader from Pokémon, with Henrik Ibsen, Norwegian playwright, because I figured a character from Minnesota should have a Scandinavian surname). The girl, unnamed, who scuffles with Sloan in Chapter 1 was not yet Anoka; I had no plans for her to reappear, nor plans to make her relevant to how the Williston archon was born. When writing Chapter 2, I had no conception of Delaney or Erika (another Pokémon gym leader) as characters until I started writing them, at which point their personalities emerged, fully-formed, all at once. I didn't know Delaney's backstory, only that she was suspicious.

What made Fargo work is that I very quickly figured this stuff out.

Throwing these ideas and characters onto the board was like putting myself in an escape room, and the challenge then became to figure out how everything slotted together. It was around Chapter 4—which I had written fully before I started posting the story, and which was about the time I realized I actually wanted to go through with what was starting to shape up as a long and ambitious work—that I started seeing the connective tissue. Kyubey's plot came into view, as well as Omaha's role in it. (Hence why Chapter 5 begins with a scene involving Homura.) I figured out Delaney's backstory, though I hadn't yet figured out how she was part of Kyubey's plot yet. The end of the first arc formed in my mind: Erika dead, Delaney alive, she and Sloan en route to Minneapolis to fight Clair. I had the beginnings of an idea how the second arc would go; there was the ghost of an idea for a third arc, but that made the story seem impossibly long, so I wrote with the belief everything would end with Clair. By the end of the arc, when I had started thinking about Clair's goons, I had the idea for Anoka, and incorporated her into the Williston archon's origin story.

I think there are still signs of lack of foresight. The actual plot of Fargo's first arc is like the plot of a Legend of Zelda game. Go to three different places, fight three bosses, then go to the final dungeon where the final boss awaits. What the characters actually do, narratively, is spin their wheels in endless action sequences; all sense of progression is driven by the slow unveiling of Delaney and Erika's backstories, which recontextualizes them as characters, as well as broadening hints toward Kyubey's plot. And Sloan's gradual recovery from the precipice of despair, of course.

That last one was a mirror of the author. Fargo was an immediate smash hit of the kind I had never seen before; I was getting two to three comments per chapter, and they were good comments, too. Before, I hadn't even been able to beg friends and family to read my novels. (I once described the plot of a pre-Bavitz novel to my grandmother; she said, "That doesn't sound any good at all.") I expected obscurity, an obscurity reflected by the aggressively anti-SEO title I decided on as a joke (Fargo being a movie I don't particularly like, and the only real overlap between that one and mine being neither is actually set in Fargo). Receiving any reception at all was a miracle.

At the same time, I moved closer to where I worked, killing my daily commute once and for all. Time, energy, and hope were surging back into me. The dream I had always harbored of being an internationally-renowned author seemed to be finally coming true. Everything was looking up. Riding this momentum, I no longer worried about the ambitious length of my story. It was worth it. I was in for the long haul.

IV. Minneapolis

Clair's personality emerged as the natural foil to Sloan, the brutish, instinct-driven meathead: elegant, careful, intelligent, poised. It was my get-out-of-the-escape-room problem solving that led me to realize this made her similar to Kyubey himself; that connection inspired the plot twist that she was, in fact, a homunculus created by him, which turned into Delaney being a homunculus too. (In early Williston chapters, I repeatedly focused on Delaney's dead eyes to foreshadow her sociopathic turn; this pedestrian bit of description became eerily serendipitous for explaining how she changed her eye color with magic to hide its natural red.)

As an author, I myself was transitioning from Sloan-esque instinct to more careful and intelligent planning. I'd already come up with Anoka, but the other Minneapolis girls emerged in ways I thought would play well off of Clair, emphasizing her uncanny and aristocratic coldness. I entered the second arc with more elaborate plotting, where I would set up characters like chess pieces and knock them over in spectacular and fulfilling ways. It all centered around the Yaldabaoth fight, which was the first part of the second arc I came up with, in a first arc sense of unconsciousness: A massive monster of light, crawling across a city, chasing magical girls as they sped around in a car.

There were some speed bumps. This arc featured the only time while writing Fargo that I scrapped a scene and rewrote it; this being the Terminatrix's introduction, which originally showed her receiving her commission from Kyubey. I felt it was plodding and tedious compared to her current introduction, which remains highly popular. (As a side note, Puella Magi Homura Magica also includes a character whom Kyubey pays to kill magical girls he doesn't like.)

Otherwise, though, I was locked in. Everything just worked. I came up with an idea for a character or a plot twist and it made perfect sense with what I had already established. It was like magic. It was effortless. I was reading literature again, too, after a year away from it; my prose improved as a result. There is unparalleled exhilaration in growth. It was like academia all over again, where I learned new things day after day and always seemed to be ascending to some better place. I started imagining future greatness. It wouldn't stop here. Fargo was just the start. My next work would be even better, would be read by more people. (Modern Cannibals remained bouncing in the back of my mind.) It wouldn't be long before I was breaking out of the internet and into the real world. They'd be talking about me...

V. Mitakihara

Why did Puella Magi Madoka Magica mean so much to me?

Because, as I mentioned, it didn't leave an immediate impact. A lot of what I look at now as masterstroke storytelling—Mami's death, or Rebellion in general—I first watched insensible, uncomprehending, somewhat blandly being washed over. Only a few months prior I had watched Lucky Star, a work that would heavily inspire one of my future stories (Cockatiel x Chameleon), and was profoundly and immediately emotionally affected by it in a way I almost never am. I cried at its conclusion. There was something unbearable and tragic in the ending of such a nice world, no matter how inoffensive that ending was; in the banal high school life it depicted, I saw reflected what I had lost forever, been sealed away from on this side of Adulthood.

(Which explains why my mindset on it changed so radically from when I was an actual high schooler, its ostensible target demographic.)

I didn't have a similar reaction to Madoka Magica. I liked it, for sure, but it was not an emotionally harrowing experience for me. Yet it grew in my mind, in ways I didn't consciously understand. It kept crawling, kept forcing me to think about it, until there was no option but for me to drop what I was doing and write over 300,000 words of fan fiction for it.

I never figured out the answer until a few years later, when I chanced upon a post someone made on Tumblr. "Okay," it said, in typical I-know-everything tone, "but can any of you tell me a single THEME in Madoka Magica?"

It made me think. What IS Madoka Magica about, beyond a plot-and-character level? The story, at least in the show, is so lean and tight that it lacks a lot of obvious signposting in this regard. It's easy to look at Madoka Magica and see a sharp story founded on a series of slick twists, with a banal hope versus despair angle for a bit of emotional punchiness. Regardless of whether you agree with that assessment or not, it certainly couldn't have been what I saw in it to make me so obsessed, right?

It's not even like Madoka Magica is a story that lends itself to fanfic, past the level of shipfic or slice of life AU. Its extreme economy of characters renders it vitriolic to expansion. Everything that matters in the world of Madoka Magica is happening in Mitakihara to five specific people. The system extends beyond them but in a useless way; magical girls in Osaka or Russia or Fargo exist, but they are doomed to irrelevance, doomed to die pointlessly. Every canonical Madoka spinoff falls into this same pratfall; the best involve the backstories of the main cast or past Homura timeloops, the rest fail to rise above sideshow.

I think what gnawed at me, what made me brute force a new narrative into this story that doesn't need one, was the reflection I saw in it. The Lucky Star kids with all their hopes and dreams and pleasant optimism tossed into the clanking reality of Adulthood, forced to work jobs with no point and no hope until they finally just died. The more I rewatch the show, the more I become consumed by a socioeconomic reading of it, the financial disparities between the characters (Hitomi, free from all of this, is rich; Madoka, the redemptive savior, is too—while Mami is faking it and Sayaka is shabbily middle class in a foreboding and monotone apartment complex, consumed by dreams of an upper-class recital she once saw), the conversations Madoka has with her parents (who tell her again and again what "being an adult is like," only to then give advice that is utterly unhelpful), the emotionless and mercenary way Kyubey dissolves all meaning in the universe to a system of pluses and minuses.

Unconsciously, the socioeconomic aspects of the original story emerged in Fargo with even more exaggeration: Sloan is introduced in terms of her outrageous poverty, everyone else is on the economic fringes (prostitutes, drug dealers), and only Clair lives in a state of financial stability. (There's a sideplot in the Minneapolis arc where she plans to gentrify the city by rooting out its Ramseys, all in service of creating a model community to show off online.) Sloan pursues monomaniacal revenge for a betrayal she suffered at Clair's hands, but the crux of the reader's disdain for Clair lies in the unctuousness of her wealth and the disposable way she treats her employees. Plus, there's the plaid-shirted workers who osmose around Williston, silent as they fall into pits and keel over dead on the streets, parts of an economy founded on resource extraction not all too dissimilar from Kyubey's own system (though he, ironically, wonders at one point why humans would get so up in arms over such a "primitive energy source").

Sloan is a have-not and Clair is a have, so there's an innate sympathy for her in favor of her archnemesis, on top of the innate sympathy readers have for protagonists over antagonists. This all sets the stage for what is in my opinion the best part of Fargo, its third arc, where the story's thematic elements come together in more interesting and subversive ways. It's all predicated on Sloan's quest for revenge having been faulty from the start, her motives much less ironclad than they first appear and her bullheadedness making her the perfect pawn in Kyubey's schemes.

The best aspect of the third arc is how Sloan is irrelevant. Seeing the outcome of her self-absorption cuts her off at the knees, and she has to grapple with the fact that the world is a lot bigger than her immediate purview. Ultimately, her role in the climax is tangential, a singular meaningful wrench tossed into a much larger machine that manages to prompt an unexpected positive outcome. She barely even factors into the penultimate chapter. (Fun fact: Chapter 41, Love, with its 10+ character POVs, was both directly inspired by Ulysses but also by a comment I got during the first arc hoping for more POVs with drastically different writing styles.) The emotional power of Sloan's arc stems from her coming to peace with her own inadequacies, both morally and in terms of greatness, and in that way she wound up being a mirror for me to the end, didn't she? In academia, I believed I was going to be someone important, and much of the existential dread of my workplace came from its boundless mediocrity. Fargo allowed me to come to terms with that mediocrity, both in the story and without; though much of that "coming to terms" was based on the new delusion that my popular fanfic would spur me on to mainstream literary success, a delusion I would not need to reckon with until after the minimal readership for my next work, Modern Cannibals.

This also explains my decision to frame Madoka's magical girl heaven as a giant office job. Though I would also defend that decision from a textual standpoint, given the esteem Madoka has for her company suit mother, and how she visualizes her mother as an example of "successful" adulthood in contrast to the cruel failure of the magical girl system.

Lastly, there's the instinctual level of things. All this socioeconomic stuff was not explicitly clear to me even as I was writing it; I didn't consciously think "Oh gotta make this about having a job." It just came out that way, an expelling of the self, the same way I unconsciously modeled some of Fargo's structure and worldbuilding on Homura Magica. The same way, I suppose, I modeled the emotional thrust of the story on Madoka Magica. A bleak downward spiral of misery and death culminating in a sudden and unexpected redemption. When, as a teen, I watched Higurashi, I remember being bowled over by its unexpectedly happy ending. I'd never seen anything like it, not in something otherwise so macabre and pessimistic. As a teen, I enjoyed that ending as a subversion of expectations, an original and novel idea. As an adult, watching Madoka Magica, it held a lot more emotional potency, and that potency was, like everything else, unconsciously replicated in Fargo.

When I wrote that final chapter, I remember being utterly drained. The finish line was in sight and I had been doing this for a year, for 300,000 words, far longer than any other story I'd ever written until then. I remember feeling like my prose was sloppy, like I was stumbling right at the end, like the chapter was no good. But the reviews were overwhelmingly positive, and now when I reread that chapter I see nothing wrong with its prose or technique. Even stripped bare, exhausted, that unconscious emotional core remained, and maybe that sense of being stripped down, so that nothing else is there but it, is what gives it so much power.

VI. Retrospective

There are flaws in Fargo. The prose is not always my best, and there are stretches that are clunky. In Chapter 3 I wrote a 5,000-word fight scene, and became possessed by the notion that all subsequent fights must be even longer, which led to some truly overlong combat sequences. There are a lot of continuity errors and mistakes, some small, some embarrassing (there's a scene where Clair tortures Delaney with boiling water and it's clear I had never boiled water before). And, significant to me, there is a lack of thematic complexity compared to my other works, with long parts of the story that aren't interested in meaning anything at all, at least overtly.

That last part might not really be a flaw, though. There is a singleminded focus on plot and character in Fargo, prompted perhaps by the unconscious way I wrote it, that was a major driver of its success. Nobody has ever complained about the continuity errors, either. At the end of the day, people might care a lot more about what comes from the heart, rather than what comes from the mind.

I'm glad, though, to be writing this retrospective on the heels of When I Win, an assiduously structured work with a lot of deliberate thematic potency that managed to achieve similar levels of success as Fargo. For a long time Fargo was a millstone around my neck. What I once looked at as the start of my literary rise started to seem like its peak. This work that I, its author, so poorly understood, could not replicate even when I tried, and yet was by far my most popular story... It was a terrifying prospect for a long time. Though a lot of detail in this regard should probably be saved for if I write a Making Of post for Chicago in the future. (Side note: Despite the prominent role Cicero and the Chicagoans play in the final arc of Fargo, with their own unresolved theater of worldbuilding, I had no intention of writing a Fargo sequel until after the "commercial failure" of Modern Cannibals.)

Even at the depths of my self-esteem, though, I never resented Fargo or its success. It's a story I like. It's a story with a lot to like about it. And, even if I don't fully understand it, it's a story that has a lot of myself in it.

Thank you, everyone, for reading.

The concept art throughout this post was created by Phetaritette, from whom a fan once commissioned art of the main characters. At the end of the Making Of posts for Cleveland Quixotic and When I Win, I talked about where I got the names of the characters from, but other than the two Pokémon gym leader names and Henrik Ibsen reference I mentioned before, most of the names in this story were dredged from people I once knew. The only other exceptions are Erika's surname, which comes from Frank "Doc" DuFresne from Red vs. Blue; Bloomington's surname, which comes from rapper Dennis "Ghostface Killah" Coles (who would be the primary template for the rapper Malkwon in Modern Cannibals); and Hennepin's surname, which comes from League of Legends pro player Johnny "Altec" Ru.

[directdogman]

hey dog! sorry to bug you with a coding question, but i'm learning rpg maker mv for a fangame & i'm wondering how you did a couple things. if it's not too much trouble, could you quickly explain some of it? i've scrounged around as much as i can but i cant find what i need so i thought it'd be worth asking directly ^^;

how did you get the players name to show up in the message log? i know theres a plugin that adds the name windows for other characters & i've got that figured out, but i have no idea how to get the players name to show up in the history after selecting stuff

how'd you get the graphic for the route diverging choices to show & play During choices? so far ive figured out that looping the images recreates the visual but then the game doesn't progress, bc its just stuck in that loop...

how'd you disable ( + grey out) dialogue options after selecting them??

how'd you add the fullscreen option? i found a code that was supposed to add a fullscreen option to the optionscore settings but that one just breaks the plugin & i simply Don't know enough javascript to figure it out myself

i'm using all the same plugins that dialtown has so clearly these are possible without extra ones, i just don't know how to do it,, thanks for explaining your pronoun system a little while ago btw! i wasn't the one who asked but your post was super helpful when i was setting it up for myself :D

It's been close to 6 years since I started making DT, and I had to figure out a few solutions to specific issues that cropped up which I've likely forgotten now, but I'll answer what I can remember. I'm also gonna give you some advice and advise you not to use RPG Maker for projects like these.

I basically Scott Cawthon'd DT and forced the engine to yield to my demands because I wanted to use the one I knew best. A few of these solutions are over-complicated because the easier ones (which would've worked in other engines) had to be constructed differently. I'll also mention a few solutions to problems you might not have encountered (but inevitably will if you try to recreate DT.) With that out of the way...

1)

You'll want these settings for the backlog plugin. the \c[x] commands refer to standard name colours. Log special inputs set to true, followed up by this below:

\n<\c[4]\n[1]\c[0]>%1

With \n[1] being the name you want and the number after the first c being what colour you want.

I'll also save you a potential future issue: I'd actually recommend you find the backlog plugin I used in DT's files (located inside the www/js/plugins folder) and use the version I have instead of the official release if you're not already, because I made a small change to fix an error. Basically, it breaks slightly with the plugin that lets you bring up the menu during dialogue because text reloads when you leave the menu and re-enter the text box, causing text to be logged at least twice after you pause it. If you keep bringing up the menu, you'll get constant duplication. I simply added a line of code that tells the log not to have two duplicates in a row. Not a programmer, but it seems works.

2)I did it in a funny way to ensure the engine wouldn't screw it up. Basically, there's 3 steps to the event and it's kinda hard to explain (and would be annoying to reproduce without a lot of trial and error for a beginner.) It's easier if I show my code. The first thing I do is run a common event (you can also just paste this code in and run it from the event) that renders the frames used by the popup, so they're loaded into memory + ready to go.

As you can see, they're set to 0 opacity but now ready to be used. Obviously they have to be on a layer that isn't being used by anything else in the scene (and won't be during this part of the game.) I run this event ahead of time, usually 4 messages before the choice comes up or so, so even slower PCs should have time to get them up.

The 'if head' thing just switches between the files for phone/typegingi's heads. I render each frame on separate layers and toggle their opacity from one to the next on a single frame to avoid flickering (bc RPG maker's renderer is hot trash and I have to work around it. Case in point.)

Step 2 is a second command event that orders the frames to fade in.

One layer is the text (which doesn't move) and the other is the first frame of the little head animation. A switch is also turned on at the end, and this signals the animation to go, which is handled by an event on any map where a choice like this comes up.

The event page that handles the animation itself has 2 pages, one to handle the animation as it goes and the other to handle when it stops (note that you could use one page and simply use a conditional branch. I didn't.)

Set to parallel so it runs in the bg behind normal events. As you can see, every 17 frames, I command one image to fade out over a single frame and another to fade in. It loops perfectly, cycling from middle frame, to left, to middle, to right, back to middle. Finally, when you select any route diverging choice, it sets off a second switch, which activates the second event page and commands the game to dispose of the graphics and then turn itself off.

Basically, it's the same animation but with a twist. The text is faded out over 60 frames and then the same animation is played as before, except the values it fades back into go from 255, to 170 to 85. Each of those commands is also followed by a 17 second fade to the opacity of the next frame. So, frame one renders in one frame at 255. Then seventeen frame fadeout to 170... Next frame renders for 1 frame AT 170, then fades out gradually to 85. Then next frame renders at 85 during 1 frame, fades to 0. This is how i synced the turning animation to fade out convincingly.

At the very end, I turn both of the switches this event page uses off so both event pages don't continue on loop. I also have a check for the first event variable to check if the game should still think the animation is running, as a failsafe. I don't remember if this mattered.

3)It's a function in the YEP Extended Message Pack. You'll see the commands for hiding (temporarily removing) + disabling choices (greying them out) as you scroll through the help list, almost 2/3 down. The thing you have to remember though is that messages that are commanded to be hidden/disabled will STAY disabled unless you turn them back on. So, ANY time there's a possibility to make a choice with a disabled or hidden message, add this plugin command to EVERY selectable choice

ClearChoiceSettings

This will ensure the game doesn't break from having a choice permadisabled. If you use loops or labels to make the game return to a previous choice, make sure the looping point is BEFORE any logic that may disable/hide a choice so it doesn't autoenable everything if the game has to go back.

4)Make a new RPG Maker project, copy the js folder from www/data/js and open the new project alongside your other one. Then check my YEP Option core plugin and follow this path in the plugin editor

This code should work.

On a similar note, I'd also take a look at how my plugins are ordered, if your list is different. I had to meddle with the list to make sure some plugins functioned correctly. This engine is held together with duct-tape and spite, so do what this advice what you will.

Hope this helps!

[marshmarrows]

what is the dupe swamp......? please i need to know if it's in any way team focus related

completely forgot i made that post. okay. so. i don't know what the dupe swamp is for sure but i DO have a collection of things 4c has said or done related to it!

november 23rd: timestamp (keep watching for a few minutes)

so 4c was flying around the server when a lag spike happened. iirc there had been a bunch of random lag spikes around this time while the orbital cannon was being built and 4c, a few minutes later, said he knew the cause of them. and that the one that had just happened had been his fault. (note: he zoomed in on the edge of a swamp biome right when the lag spike happened)

november 24th (after the spawn war fight when everyone was going to the cannon): timestamp

this is the message i initially caught when watching live and he and squiddo messaged a bit about how it felt like the swamp lag and only happened when people were flying towards the cannon. i'll come back to this.

january 12th (during the subathon so this is a vods archive link): timestamp

4c was, iirc, flying back to the focus base here and changed directions a bit, only to catch the edge of a swamp biome on his render. and then he quickly changed directions again and went "uh oh, uh oh. the server might lag, the server might lag."

based on surrounding terrain, this was the same swamp as the one on november 23rd. coords are roughly 2700 3000.

january 26th (another subathon vod): timestamp

small notes here. 4c had weird chunk lag flying around again and asked if he was "at the place" before realizing he wasn't and it was just something else going on. the place in question is probably the swamp.

november 24th (yes i'm coming back to this):

okay so the january 26th lag is what prompted me to go back and find timestamps for everything else. and in the process of doing so, i noticed something that i hadn't caught the first time around because i'd been switching between povs.

this is what 4c initially typed before presumably remembering he and squiddo were both live and swapping out dupe for swamp.

so. So. that's all the information i've gathered on the dupe swamp so far. but it's interesting to think about, especially when you consider that it's most likely tied to when squiddo accidentally banned 4c and they had to get minute and mapicc involved so he could play again. idk. lots to consider! here are my clues to do detective work on! be free!

[galedekarios]

gale as a professor at blackstaff academy

i have to say that at first i wasn't too sold on the (then still fanon) idea of a professor ending because of gale's own prior anecdote about being irked by his previous students and their inadequacies.

i thought it might not be a good fit for him as far as professions go.

but reading the epilogue files, i have come around on it.

i think it's just one more way in which he's really grown into himself, become content with who he was in the past, the mistakes he made and what he has learned from them, and the person he wants to be in the future:

Player: You? A teacher? I'd hardly say you set the best example for impressionable young wizards... Gale: I think it makes perfect sense. devnote: Surprised you wouldn't recognise this, a tiny bit offended you don't trust him to do this Gale: Who better to warn of the perils of misusing magic than someone who was once only a wayward sneeze away from destroying a mid-sized settlement? devnote: playing up to his past a bit, you can imagine this is how he acts with his students Tara the Tressym: Don't remind me of those terrible times, Mr Dekarios. My blood pressure has only just recovered.

a few more cute banters & things we learn about gale and his new teaching position:

tara swipes at students who fall asleep in gale's classes, which he himself doesn't mind. he, too, slept through some of them (like his calishite lessons):

Player: Perhaps that's a good thing. I'm sure they're far better students than I was... Gale: Ah, so you still remember our little lesson? devnote: A little bit bashful, it was a vulnerable moment for him Gale: 'Teaching' you was hardly an effort at all. Not like my present cohort of apprentices. devnote: Complimentary, pulling the thought back to the teaching element after getting lost in the memory of the moment Gale: They try their best, of course - when they can manage to stay awake. devnote: Not upset by this - he slept through his fair share of classes as a student Tara the Tressym: The cheek of them! Nothing a well-placed swipe from Tara can't fix, though.

2. gale offered to teach more subjects than illusion via simulacra:

Player: Only a professor? With your expertise, I'd have thought you could teach every kind of magic going... Gale: I did offer, as a matter of fact. devnote: Secretly glad the player thinks so highly of him Gale: However, the Blackstaff insisted I couldn't teach every subject, nor could the simulacra of myself I offered to create for that purpose. devnote: Reluctantly accepts that this was the right decision Gale: So, I've settled for teaching the art of illusion. Magic to confound the senses, to render the impossible into reality, and to allow expression of that most magical attribute of all - imagination. devnote: Selling it a bit - he wants to make sure you appreciate how cool this is

3. gale has told his students about the player's adventures and will invite a player to be a guest lecturer:

Player: I found the love of my life. I'd say I'm pretty happy. Gale: And I couldn't be happier for you. A fitting reward for the sacrifices you made in getting here. Gale: I've told my students plenty of tales about our escapades. You're something of a hero to them, you know. Gale: I'd be delighted to introduce you to my current cohort - as a guest lecturer, perhaps? I'm sure they'd have plenty of questions for you. Player: It would be my pleasure. Gale: Excellent. I knew you wouldn't be able to resist the allure of sharing your expertise. Gale: Of course you'll be most welcome to stay with me in my tower- Tara the Tressym: Ahem. Gale: My apologies, Tara. That would be our tower.

4. his students find him somewhat intimidating due to his backstory with mystra and the orb:

Gale: Well, that was quite lovely. I'm glad you're as pleased to see me as I am you. Gale: I have to say, I'm quite grateful to just be 'Gale' for the evening. Gale: I fear my students find me somewhat intimidating, due to my erm, explosive former reputation. I seem to put the fear of the gods into them. devnote: He plays up to his reputations a bit, so he isn't overly surprised Gale: Or the fear of Mystra, to be more specific. Gale: I surrendered the Crown of Karsus to her, as I told you I would. And in return, she cured me of the orb at last. Gale: Even now, I struggle to put the feeling into words. It was like exhaling for the first time, after holding my breath for so very long. Gale: Of course, I haven't clarified with my students that the orb is no longer a threat. The legend of my explosive capabilities is an excellent means of controlling a classroom. Too good, if anything.

5. he wants to teach his students that there is fun in studying magic:

Gale: I spend most of my time trying to convince them how much fun the study of magic can be, but it'd be easier to crack a smile on an intellect devourer than some of my pupils... devnote: Despairing a little, doesn't understand why they aren't all as passionate as he was Player: Or on a mind flayer, perhaps... Gale: Smiling may no longer come easy to you, but I've seen how your tentacles twitch at my jokes. Even the ones I'm not entirely certain I was trying to make... devnote: Last sentence a tiny bit self-conscious, aware that people sometimes find him ridiculous. Gale: Still, I hoped my students might be a little more open to the playful side of such magic.

anyhow, i hope this was insightful to someone! 🖤

[wishingstarinajar]

Gonna throw out my thoughts and opinions about Earthspark Season 3. A fair warning that it isn't all that positive.

Spoilers under the cut!

What I liked about season 3:

Frenzy and Lazerbeak, fuck yeah! They were funny.

Prowl, for the most part.

Mopey and pouty Megatron (though perhaps that was a bit too much for too long).

The beef between Prowl and Megatron, which I'd have liked to last for far longer than it did in S3.

Agent Schloder, I miss you.

Beryllium baloney!

My gripes:

The new studio and writers.

The Quintessons felt like a not-thought-through plan to add a 2nd Big Bad to the series while cashing in on nostalgia. They were poorly executed. Not terrible but still not great.

The Chaos Terrans also felt like an afterthought in season 3.

The way I see it, we lost the Decepticons because the cast grew far too large for the climax thanks to the 2nd Big Bad of seasons 2 and 3 and new cast additions.

Because of the huge cast, characters often had to get hurt or be set aside for the dumbest reasons, all so that others could have their few seconds of spotlight/attention.

Why does this studio have such an issue with animating mouths?

It seems they couldn't get a hold of Keith David for Grimlock (or didn't have the budget to pay him) for this season. The awkward silences with Grimlock were, yeah, awkward.

While logical, Shockwave was too soft of a Decepticon leader and frankly, doomed all Decepticons to stay stuck in the dome. Though of course, the dome was a plot device to keep the Decepticons separated from the Quintesson plot line.

Breakdown's betrayal of Bumblebee was ?????.

The Quintesson ship was a drill! Why did you use the ship's screw shape and turn it vertically only not to use it like a drill a la 80s movie fashion?? screeee--

The writers tried to make Cosmos a silly little guy but missed the mark. Sorry Weird Al, at least you're funnier in other cameos.

Showing Starscream's silhouette behind the Titan's optic a few times as if he was going to be of importance later was a bit insulting, especially after it turns out he lost his marbles and held tea parties in the Titan's head with the "corpses" of the Chaos Terrans. He got to do nothing. Thanks, writing team.

Stiff action scenes compared to Season 1.

Nobody asked for a whole episode dedicated to Fairmaestro in an already extremely limited season 3. Nobody.

Prowl was fine and an interesting addition to the team until the 2nd half of the final episode. Another victim of "rushing the plot".

Elita-1 and Arcee are too similar in personality and fighting spirit and, while I have no problem at all with tough strong women in a series, I'd have liked at least one softer lady in the cast. Not all women have to kick butt.

Megatron's propellers are deemed "too old-fashioned" for a mission requiring flyers, so Cosmos and Prowl (who has two cool but "flimsy" thrusters) were put on the case instead. Fair, I guess? Yet the moment Prowl is out of commission, Nightshade replaces him. I mean, what makes Nightshade stronger than Megatron?

Optimus makes a big deal toward Prowl about taking the spark revival key with him after leaving Cybertron, implying it is an important artifact, but he is totally fine with Mo nabbing it AND holding onto it like an oversized necklace.

The underwater fight scene with Robby and Mo on the Quintesson ship was boring and had bad sound mixing.

Why was Dottie reduced to Megatron's "army support human"?

I know I complain about the cast being too big but where was Tarantulas and when will he and Nightshade interact again?

I get Witwicky is a town in the middle of nowhere, but I don't think there is any forest or wildlife left with Terratronus stomping about.

Dafak was that snow rendering and animation?

Dafak was that drive-in theater episode?

Dafak was this season??

[jellyskink]

This is the first bit of non-comic writing I've done for the Domesticated Ford AU! It's short, but I wanted to write a bit of the Forbidden Polycule. Hand of God belongs to @alexthebordercollie !

---------------

Irene hadn’t known the meaning of "off the clock" since med school. Days bled into nights into commitments into personal time into work. Her life was a cavalcade of sisyphean responsibilities. The thing was, most of the time, she didn't mind it. It didn't bring her joy, exactly, but a sort of satisfaction. A whole feeling, frayed at the edges but comfortable. That was, at least, when she wasn't being asked to do something competely ridiculous.

D, a nickname for Irene's local Stanford Pines, had been nervous during his last appointment. That wasn't uncommon for him; the man generally eminated the same energy as a wounded deer with a mild case of mange. He wasn't usually uneasy around HER, however. He was getting ready to leave when he finally worked up the courage to say what was on his mind.

"I-I'd like to make a request," he rasped. He waited for her assent to continue. Oleander bobbed her chin in a slight nod. D beamed at her, apparently overjoyed to be given permission to speak. "Thank you! Thank you. Ah, this doesn't mean you have to ultimately agree, of course, but I appreciate your hearing me out."

D's request involved one of his few friends, H. H was the one who had given D his nickname. Apparently, it stood for "domesticated." Not exactly a charitable title, but D didn't seem to mind it. It certainly cut down on confusion while talking about the two of them. Irene didn't know H very well, but from what she had seen, he was sullen, cold and violent (he was, after all, the Hand of God in his dimension.) For some reason, though, D adored him.

As it turned out, H had been having trouble drawing.

"I think he's depressed," D fretted. "I can't understand why, but he's showing a broad range of symptoms that would be likely to land him a clinical diagnosis." D kneaded his Bill necklace, its hard edges pressing lines into his age-worn skin. "I haven't had much success getting him to pursue creative endeavors myself. He says it's all pointless, and that he'd rather watch me draw. I don't know if that's true." Irene nodded. D could be surprisingly perceptive at times. It was all the more astonishing when contrasted against the remaining 95% of his life, in which he displayed the emotional intelligence of a brick.

That brought Irene to D's request. He wanted the three of them to draw each other. If it felt a bit like a game, he reasoned, H might be more tempted to join. Doubly so if he got something in return. Irene had almost refused outright. She was no artist. D's proposal would only end with her embarrassing herself with her lack of skill. But, well. D would have been crushed if she refused. He so rarely worked up the courage to ask for anything; this must have been truly important to him. And, if he was correct in his supposition, she would be able to make a positive difference in H's mental health with very little effort on her part. So she agreed.

H, Irene was told, had access to a computer. That made things a bit easier; traveling between dimensions could be a pain (she'd learned that through her efforts to reach Calamari's shows.) It was decided that D would draw H, H would draw Irene, and she would draw D. Once they were all done, they would share them with each other.

D, not having access to a computer himself, showed up at the office in person to have Irene scan his drawing. He'd arrived unexpectedly during one of Irene's other appointments (it had been with a Cipher loyalist.) The trip must have exhausted him, as he was still winded by the time she was able to speak with him. He grinned as he handed her his drawing of H. It was... really good. H, rendered in black and white, had the look of a roman statue; severe angles mixed with biological softness, imposing yet tender. He was surrounded by an abstract cloud of yellow; golden triangles dancing in god rays. The whole thing screamed with D's feelings of sincere admiration for the other man.

Irene exchanged D's drawing with her attempt at randering him (she had already scanned it to send to H, as D had wanted everyone to see each other's efforts). It was, frankly, terrible. She'd tried to elevate the piece beyond her comfort area of "stick figure." The result had ended up looking more like pancaked roadkill than a human. Still, D had been ecstatic at the gift.

"It's wonderful!" He beamed. "It is very charming!" Irene had never known him to be so good at lying.

So now there Irene was. Sitting at her laptop, adorned with one of her many sets of cat-themed pajamas. She'd emailed H both her and D's drawings the other day. Apparently he had responded during her drive home.

'Tell D I like his drawing. Yours is shit. You made him look like a potato. Here's yours.'

Embarrassment curdled in Irene's chest as she downloaded the attachment. She KNEW she couldn't draw, and it's not like her ego was riding on a skill she knew she didn't possess, but still. He could have at least had the grace to be polite about her kindergartener-level skills. When she opened H's drawing, it only drove home how vastly different their abilities were. Irene stared at her mirrored image on the screen. Unlike D's picture, it lacked any sort of creative flare. It was an exact replica of the photo of herself she'd sent to him. Well, nearly exact. The longer Irene looked at it, the more it seemed off. She couldn't exactly tell how; it was still very good, and for as little as Irene could critically analyze art, all she could say was that she looked like herself. There was a subtle sense of wrongness, though, like something was skewed.

She told H it was amazing.

[insecuregodcomplex]

sorry i never did something with this beyond what's here, thank u for the idea zahraa (x)

---

Weeks after the move, Buck still feels like he was living at the Diaz house. After years of memories here with Eddie and Chris at its center, everything around him echoed with a touch of them. And so, here Buck was, on a Friday night, cracking open a beer after a relatively calm shift, and scrolling through the options for documentaries to watch, trying to relax as he spread out on the couch.

A knock at the door shifts his attention away from the television, and he pulls a coaster out to set his beer atop as he stretches to standing. “Coming,” he calls.

As soon as he opens the door, he’s rendered speechless.

“Ev—Buck? I guess…Eddie didn’t say…sorry. I just, uh, I’m here to grab my duffel I lent to Eddie. Do you—did he give it to you?”

Buck realizes he’s still scanning Tommy’s face and stutters out an invite inside. As they step into the space, Buck starts reassessing every design decision he’s made the past few weeks. The silence spreading between them doesn’t help.

“Uh, no, sorry, I don’t know what duffel you’re talking about, actually. Eddie didn’t tell me you might stop over.”

They stop in the kitchen. Tommy replies, “I mean, his life has been a bit crazy recently, I’m sure he’s had a million things to keep track of. He said I could head over here and pick up my bag tonight when I asked, though, which…” He trails off.

Buck offers something of a small smile. “He’s been telling me to reach out to you. Probably thought he could force it to happen when you texted him.”

Tommy looks up as he nods slightly. “Well, he’s been telling me to reach out to you, too, so that makes sense to me.” As he looks away from Buck, his eyes start scanning the surroundings. “Wait — did you, do you live here now?”

“Ah, yeah. I’m renting the place.”

“What happened to the loft?”

Buck shrugs. “I assume someone else lives there now.” He looks down and catches their empty hands. “Do you, uh, do you want a beer? Or something to eat? I’ve got some loaves, actually,” he pauses as he rummages around the fridge. “Here,” he holds out a cranberry orange loaf from a few nights ago, his heart picking up speed with his immediate recollection of Tommy's favorite flavor pairing. “Uh, well. If you want it. You can have it.”

“Is that cranberry orange?” Tommy takes it and inspects it. "Smells delicious. Did you make it?"

Buck feels the bashful grin before it even spreads across his face. "Yeah. I've been, uh, kinda getting into baking. Since we...since we last saw each other."

Tommy's composure wavers slightly, but he continues on without acknowledging it. "That's great, Buck. You're really skilled, I can tell." He offers a wavering half-smile. "Thanks for sharing with me."

"It's a poor substitute for a duffel bag, I suppose," Buck laughs off the compliment. "I bet I have one around here, if you need one? D-Do you need a bag?"

Tommy visibly hesitates. "Oh, I don't—" He checks his watch. "I don't really need it. It's fine." He chuckles and runs a hand through his hair with a sigh when Buck looks at him questioningly. "It's fine. I can find another one to use at home. Then you won't be out a bag for us to coordinate me getting it back to you."

"Oh," Buck deflates. "Right. I mean, if you just don't want to see me, you could give it to someone else, or leave it at the door or —"

"Evan," Tommy begins, and he either doesn't realize his slip or doesn't care. "It's not that I don't want to see you. It's — It's more that I'd love to see you. And, well. I don't want to make you feel like you have to see me. Again." He gestures to their current situation.

"You —You want to see me?" Buck can't help the flutter in his chest.

"Of course I do."

"Tommy, you're the one who broke up with me."

Tommy sucks in a breath. "I did do that."

[spjohnv-blog]

If you're familiar with the South Park Archives, pretty much the only SP fansite still online - there's over eighteen years of history there, pages and renders for tons of characters and locations, thousands of screenshots, a pretty dedicated staff, transcripts of every episode, and so much more. When I made my start writing shitty fanfics, it was a super useful resource, and that was a small chunk of what it is today.

FANDOM has today unveiled a new Offensive Terms Policy which continues a trend in the last few years been suggested in events like Community Connect, where it has previously been suggested wikis avoid references to canonical sex. The avoidance of slurs is something I would be super supportive of generally -- we don't need to see that kind of stuff on Wookiepedia or like, a wiki for Bluey. It'll keep people from vandalizing children's wikis with adult content for kicks. I am generally in favor of content filtering, especially for family-friendly-oriented content.

...but, this is going to cause a lot of problems for the South Park Archives, a show with a major character who frequently uses slurs and is firmly anti-censorship. You don't need to be an editor to think about that. If you're a fan, you know what kind of show we're talking about.

This is a show with episodes called "The Biggest Douche in the Universe", "Major Boobage", "Reverse Cowgirl" and "Titties and Dragons". There are songs like "Fuck the Police" and "Jacking it in San Diego". There is a character called 'Retarded Fish'. The names of these songs and episodes, bear in mind, are legally registered copyrights, not our choices -- how do you change that? Move an article to Episode 1601? What about "Fuck the Police", which isn't even a South Park original song?

You can clean up a synopsis, and formalize language on a character page, I've done both of those things when I was an editor, but you can't undo all of this. How do you?

That's not even getting into the transcripts pages, which are intended to be 100% accurate to the actual dialogue, continuing the tradition from the good ol' South Park Scriptorium...

Within the day of the policy change, FANDOM has already started to make changes to remove slurs from the transcript pages that are unable to be modified as it is directly related to global policy. I don't know that the staff were communicated with about this personally either, but I'm not in the know like I used to be.

No doubt some of this move is prompted by advertisers - FANDOM previously cited advertiser feedback as a motivation for inserting all sorts of videos on top of wiki pages (similar to their later push to include AI-generated content) and understandably many advertisers may not want their brand name mere inches from a discussion of cartoon eight-year-olds using slurs. I mean, shoot, I wouldn't if I were in charge of a major company, and I get someone needs to keep the lights on, but...

I don't know man, it's a shitty position to be in. It's a well-intended policy that I'd support in almost any other context but literally this narrow exception, and I definitely hate the thought of looking like I'd be defending use of offensive terms, but like, how do you cover "everything" about South Park, an explicitly adult show that is so firmly anti-censorship, that builds entire episodes around these kinds of jokes, or even analyze it from a critical perspective, in such a family-friendly, sanitized way, without betraying its spirit and creative intent?

You can imagine how many staff members there are probably scratching their heads or bashing them into lamp posts, trying to figure out what to do or how to move forward after this. They could apply for an exception, but would it even be granted? What would the alternative be? Are restrictions like this worth it or do they render the whole thing moot? How much responsibility lies with FANDOM? Are advertisers forcing the whole internet down this road? There are so many questions in the air on this. I certainly don't have answers.