#and this did numbers on tiktok but i have too much self respect to post it on instagram

[vanilla-extracter]

[cowboylikedean]

hey question from someone who’s not very involved in the fandom: i’ve seen ppl use the term ‘gaylor’ a lot, particularly in a derogatory manner. i’m wondering if ‘gaylor’ means, like, anyone who thinks taylor is queer/believes she’s had relationships w women, or if it’s like a specific subset of the fandom with a specific set of beliefs that act a certain way that ppl don’t like?

It's highly contextual, anon.

Basically, it's both. More accurately it's people who believe in conspiracy theories that Taylor is queer and/or her relationships with men are lies, and those who excuse them.

Taylor has publicly stated she's straight. Before then, I said it was anyone's game to think she could be bi, because she'd never self-identified any way and had publicly expressed interest in men (and, therefore, not a lesbian). However, since she self identified in 2019, any run around to insist that she's queer holds serious suspect as being disrespectful. As a rule, it is disrespectful to assume you know someone's sexuality better than they do. I feel pretty strongly about that.....

Gaylors range from newbies on tiktok who don't know any better to people who have been here for 10 years, but the central thing that holds them together is a false idea that Taylor's public "persona" is a lie and personally, she's a different person.

A lot of them believe in kaylor and other queer relationships (which, again, I also have believed in my time! Just not in the romantic or sexual sense since Taylor said she's straight!!) and that if you don't think so (aka if you believe Taylor when she says she's straight, or at the least - respect her right to self identify without second guessing - which is a thing all people, especially queer, should have the right to), you're homophobic. They have a number of dogwhistles they use to prove it.

My favorite of which is James is a girl. There are other variations of "queer people can see themselves in the music," but James is special. See, there's literally no narrative reason to think James is a girl. The only narrative reason to suggest James is a boy is that he's a moron, and the song and narrative feel straight. They have no little queer things like other songs the gaylors have used to "prove" their insane theories. Dress, for instance, has the element of hiding in plain sight, which is an experience queer people - especially queer women - know all too well. betty displays nothing that connects to the queer experience. It literally doesn't sound gay. Like if it makes you feel good to think that James is a girl, go ahead! I like the idea that Inez is August! I'm not going to tell you how to read this fictional story. But like... there is nothing in the story that is exceptionally queer.

But in summer of 2020, if you even so much as suggested that James was a boy, you had anons all over you. There were thousands of posts made by every idiot and their mother about how "queer people can read this music however they want" and "it's homophobic to say that Taylor couldn't write about two girls" and "it's disgustingly homophobic to say that queer people shouldn't see themselves in Taylor's work" and "Taylor writing about queer things isn't the worst thing in the world!" And the crazy thing is, literally none of this was ever disagreed with! I'm sure there are some one off homophobes in this fandom, but they are laughably small. The vast majority, by a WIDE margin of people never said anything like that and wouldn't say anything like that. All they said is that Taylor intended James to be a boy, which she did. If you wanna read it otherwise, no one is stopping you. No one said that queer people couldn't see themselves in James and Betty's story, no one said that Taylor couldn't write about queer characters, no one said that it would ruin the story to see it as queer, no one said that Taylor writing about queer stories would be bad in any way. They just said that James felt like a boy to them... Or that Taylor said James was a boy, and so, regardless of how you like to read the story, that's what she intended.

The reason this felt like such an attack that the gaylors had to misrepresent the statements they were arguing against is because what they were actually saying is that Betty and James proved that Taylor is gay. So if you thought James was a boy, or you thought Taylor intended James to be a boy, regardless of whether or not that's how you read it, then she didn't release the song because she's gay. And that's what they thought was homophobic. To them, anything that doesn't say "Taylor is gay" is homophobic.

And that's why I said "and the people who excuse them." Because not all gaylors directly believe Taylor is a lesbian and Joe was a beard, but they all buy into the dogwhistles and the bullying... And so they contribute and give those who do believe in conspiracies their cover. Furthermore, the more time someone spends in that space, the more credence they give to the conspiracies.

Does all that make sense?

[ericleo108]

06/30/2023 Click here for Spotify, Apple Music, or Youtube. “Freaky Naughty” is my 50th official release. This song is party music. The song was self-recorded but mixed and mastered by Keyano. The beat is by Tantu and the cover art is made by xoxodesigns from fiverr.

This was a track from the 108 album era in 2021. Just like with “god damn” and “we make the party” I talk about global warming because I promised myself I would talk about the subject in my party music to raise awareness. And because my specialty is edutainment I basically have three things I talk about most if I’m not on a special subject matter for the song. Especially for edutainment, I talk about global warming, American inequality, and expanding upon the meaning of 108. Because my song “Atheist Raps” is currently my best-performing song on Spotify, future lyrics will also consistently talk about atheism which also ties back into the 108 stuff.

This is one of the first party songs I did as Eric Leo 108. I don’t know why but for the longest time I didn’t think it was good enough, which is why it isn’t in the 108 album. I left it. I only decided to get it produced when I found I could get it produced for cheap. It’s based off an old demo and is one of those songs that I want in my catalog but I don’t know if it will be popular. 

The next release “With You” is my last tracked released weekly. Due to budget constraints and wanting to promote established material, I will only be releasing twice a month instead of every week for at least a month. I started releasing once a week to build momentum on social media and the like and it hasn’t really worked. 

The reason I’m not more strict on releasing once a week is because it doesn’t matter. You can check the follower numbers in the description of each YouTube long form sunday update. But just to put it in perspective, releasing once a week and a Word of the day rhyme everyday for almost exactly 4 months has gotten me: 8 followers on twitter, 138 followers on TikTok, 45 on instagram, 51 on YouTube, 14 on Spotify, and lost 17 on soundcloud. You tell me if the effort is worth it

You can see me talk about this blog post from last Sunday’s Update here:

Lyrics:

I got that hip and insipid God-given ridiculous flow

Take a listen my written rhythm a system to know

That love ain’t cute, love ain’t sweet

Most play it like a game where losers weep

I’m just like a squirrel, Try’na get a nut. 

So I run up on my love and hug her on the butt 

Come through style’n, shine’n, wil’n

Feel’n so fly, like Gambino Childish

Where’d you get this shit at? You’re uncle he knows

He grows it, he showed me, let’s get cozy and stoned

We’ll hibernate and find our nature among bears 

We’ll eat a bunch of mushrooms, act weird, and just stare

We’ll come back to reality when we find ourselves

Where we won’t find our thoughts are too bizarre to help 

Had an introspective journey of self-love and respect 

Took too much, ate a bunch, and just slept

Hands up if you like to party 

You and me get freaky naughty 

Uh, let’s get it started 

We don’t stop til we exhausted 

Hands up if you like to party 

You and me get freaky naughty 

Uh, let’s get it started 

We don’t stop til we exhausted 

Come on, let’s rally, take another tally 

Go big like the finale, get naked like it Cali 

If you don’t got looks, go with personality

Don’t have personality, be happy with not mattering

Everything in moderation like the ancient Greeks 

What you got for logic, come on think don’t be sheep

Don’t know if the glass half full or not

But The sun half-whole on the equinox 

It’s all good, it’s alright, 

We gon’ spread some love and have fun tonight

Cheers to good health, yourself, and women

Your dreams coming true and stay’n true to your vision

It’s all good, it’s alright, 

We gon’ spread some love and have fun tonight

Cheers to good health, yourself, and women

Your dreams coming true and stay’n true to your vision

Hands up if you like to party 

You and me get freaky naughty 

Uh, let’s get it started 

We don’t stop til we exhausted 

Hands up if you like to party 

You and me get freaky naughty 

Uh, let’s get it started 

We don’t stop til we exhausted 

This is for those who like to drink responsibly 

Think about plot’n things, triangle their isosceles

Throw another up after metabolizing probably  

Possibly a consumer commodity

Cogs in the economy with smog for the ecology

Global warming leaves more carbon to feed 

The problem is a lack of carbon vacuums such as trees

Forget about the facts, get the cash, run the track

It’s all good, it’s alright, 

We gon’ spread some love and have fun tonight

Cheers to good health, yourself, and women

Your dreams coming true and stay’n true to your vision

It’s all good, it’s alright, 

We gon’ spread some love and have fun tonight

Cheers to good health, yourself, and women

Your dreams coming true and stay’n true to your vision

Hands up if you like to party 

You and me get freaky naughty 

Uh, let’s get it started 

We don’t stop til we exhausted 

Hands up if you like to party 

You and me get freaky naughty 

Uh, let’s get it started 

We don’t stop til we exhausted 

Day 365, how you measure a year

In degrees that a circle, sphere 

Proof god loves us is in beer

This one’s for you, here, cheers

Hands up if you like to party 

You and me get freaky naughty 

Uh, let’s get it started 

We don’t stop til we exhausted

[homo-sex-shoe-whale]

Online shipping, the fetishisation of gay men, and the romanticisation of queer trauma

An essay by me!

Word count: 2.8k

A link to the Google Doc version of this essay.

A big thank you to my friends Nathan @themeerkatnate, Mav @not-mavv , and Duke @dukedark-ness for reading this essay and giving me their thoughts as mlms on the topic. Make sure to check out their blogs and give them a follow!

So I was on a lovely website by the name of Twitter.com yesterday, just scrolling through while having my afternoon cup of coffee, when I saw that viral post of a girl reading a Larry fanfic through a classroom projector. I'm sure most of you have seen it. It's gone viral on Instagram, TikTok, and likely Tumblr too, and if you haven't come across it I'm positive you will soon.

Now, after getting through my initial reaction to that post which was, holy fuck, that's so embarrassing, I had a second reaction of... wait, this ship is still around?

And after I had some thoughts on the incredible permanence of some online ships and the weird obsolescence of others, I did get to thinking of how lots of these popular ships seem to stem from the same types of perceived relationship dynamics and homophobic stereotypes.

These online fandoms often seem to have an obsession with objects of queer trauma, such as having to hide a relationship, lying about sexuality for self-preservation, and even social rejection. So, after some opinions from my followers and the great archive that is the internet, I've decided to discuss some of the most popular examples of online shipping and the particular nuances they came with.

NOTE: Out of respect for all these people, I won't be sharing viral images or videos of them in perceived romantic proximity (or even kissing, as is applicable for some examples), but I will be describing certain moments I deem to be relevant. So even if you're unfamiliar with them, you won't be confused as to what I'm talking about.

NOTE 2: Although not all people within these fandoms were/are toxic, this essay is focused on the overall toxicity of the fandoms, and how they are toxic more so as a "hive" than as a group of individuals. When I refer to a fandom I don't mean every person involved in the fandom, but rather the collective impact of the group.

 1. Harry Styles and Louis Tomlinson 

This is arguably the most popular example of online shipping. The absolute permanence of this ship, and how its fandom never seems to fully die off even beyond the lifespan of One Direction as it once stood, is downright impressive.  

I'm going to be the first to admit I was never in the loop with this fandom. My childhood best friend was actually a massive Larry shipper and asked me to beta read one of her fics, but that was before I even knew who tf Harry and Louis were! Not because I avoided the fandom or even because I rejected the online shipping, but just by coincidence, I delved into the world of pop punk music right when One Direction began gaining its popularity. I bought my first ever album, Riot by Paramore, in 2011- only a year after One Direction made their X-Factor debut. So, this fandom just bypassed me by a sort of weird coincidence.

But I don't need to be in the loop with this fandom to know the astronomical obsession with these two men, no, these two BOYS, was extremely toxic. In 2010, when One Direction made their debut, Harry Styles was only 16 years old. And Louis Tomlinson wasn't much older at 19! This made the two of them incredibly young when this unprecedented wave of shipping hit the internet, and although that must be traumatising for anyone, I cannot even fathom how overwhelming it must've been for two boys that young.  

I'm 18, almost 19 now, and I cannot begin to imagine how scary it was for the two of them to have their every interaction nitpicked within an inch of its life by thousands upon thousands of people online. I do not know this myself, but from numerous recounts by some of my followers, this massively impacted Harry's and Louis' nondescript relationship in real life, seemingly driving the two previously close friends apart. 

Now, before we move on, there's something we need to talk about. And that is the obsession with the dominance/submission dynamic within the world of gay shipping. 

With almost every popular mlm (an acronym meaning man-loving-man) ship based on real people, it seems that fandoms have a particular fascination with power imbalances in these relationships. You don't even need to look at the insane amount of fanfictions based on BDSM to figure this out. In almost all of the examples I'll be citing today, there is an age gap within the perceived relationship and a person the fandom has seemingly decided to be the top/dominant figure. 

Harry Styles and Louis Tomlinson are 3 years apart in age. Although it isn't all that relevant now, an age gap of 3 years when you're in your late teens is a lot more significant. In 2012, for example, when this shipping really started gaining traction, Harry Styles was 18 and Louis Tomlinson was 21. That power imbalance, albeit not that significant, is enough for a fandom to latch on to. We'll see this a lot more in the coming example with Dan and Phil.

 2. Dan Howell and Phil Lester

It's impossible to have a discussion about internet shipping without talking about Dan and Phil.

 Dan Howell and Phil Lester, although being popular YouTubers individually, are arguably one of the internet's most iconic duos. The two creators published their first videos together in 2009, and while their relationship was already a motive of speculation back then, the peak of the "Phan" shipping definitely came in the 2013-2016 era of Tumblr.

Now, I'm going to admit… I was actually on Tumblr when that happened. 

The 2013-2016 period perfectly aligns with my middle school days (I started middle school in 2013 and high school in 2016), and I was not only on Tumblr back then, but I was on Wattpad too! Again, this wasn't a fandom I had much contact with as I had a huge anime phase in middle school and I was on Tumblr posting mainly photography and Soul Eater content more than anything. 

But I did watch some of Dan and Phil's videos! And the occasional "Phan" content did not completely evade me as one of my closest friends in middle school had a fanchat for them. I wasn't involved in the fandom myself but they were actually one of the few English-speaking YouTubers I watched once in a blue moon (back then I watched mainly Brazilian YouTubers). One thing I did in fact notice over the years, around 2014ish perhaps, was that the two of them seemed to grow increasingly "awkward" around each other, in a way that many folks on the internet thought was reminiscent to Markiplier/Jacksepticeye, two YouTubers who also dealt with extraordinary amounts of shipping.

I'm not the only one who thinks this. The change in Dan and Phil's relationship, at least to the outside world, was clear to almost anyone who watched their videos for a while. I cannot blame them at all. The shipping was nuts. Between the countless fan videos, speculative comments, and insurmountable number of fanfics, there's no way the two of them didn't feel the weight of the shipping. The term "demon phannie" made its way into internet vernacular and there it stayed for years. Even Shane Dawson, who was one of the largest creators on the platform at the time, made several videos speculating on the nature of Dan and Phil's relationship and their sexual orientations. 

There was even porn made in which actors with similar appearances to the creators were made to have sex on camera. 

Now, this is actually a rare example where the two people involved in the ship actually came out as gay once the shipping seemed to die down. I'm incredibly happy Dan and Phil both reached a point where they were comfortable being publicly out, but I hate to say I'm shocked this day ever came. If I'd gone through what the two of them did, I don't know if I'd ever trust the internet. 

And again, this ship's fandom definitely had an obsession with the power dynamics they thought existed between the people within the ship. Dan Howell is 4 years younger than Phil Lester, and was only 18 in 2009, when they started making videos together. From my personal understanding, the shipping was often quite focused on this dominant/submissive dynamic especially in discussions from their early relationship. And this is in no way exclusive to Dan and Phil.

This general fascination with the older man/younger man dynamic, in my opinion, plays into the homophobic stereotype that gay men are predators. The idea that gay men usually seek younger men, and somehow "convince" them to engage in homosexual relationships, is popular homophobic rhetoric. The popularisation, exaggeration, and fetishisation of these power imbalances, in age and/or in relationship dynamics, is directly harmful to the mlm community. 

Not only that, but the romanticisation of a "hidden/forbidden relationship" is also detrimental not only to gay men and the mlm community, but to queer people as a whole. Queer people face huge trauma having to hide their relationships; queer attraction is already a societal taboo. And acting like this is good, or even desirable, is harmful to queer people as a whole, regardless of whether or not it's actually applicable to the people being shipped. It normalises this trauma not only to cisgender, heterosexual people, but to impressionable queer youth who grow to believe this type of trauma is to be expected. 

3. Frank Iero and Gerard Way

This is another example where the perceived power imbalances between the two subjects of the shipping were directly exploited online. Now, this ship did precede the others mentioned above. If we're looking at this topic chronologically, this particular ship did come first in the shipping timeline. It's closer to the origin of the shipping extended universe, if you will.

In case you aren't familiar with them, Frank Iero and Gerard Way are both members of the American emo band My Chemical Romance. This ship is the first one here of which I don't recall the full popularity. It really peaked in popularity around the late 2000s, circa 2008. And I don't remember this moment online as in 2008, I was only 6 years old and believe it or not, I wasn't really all that concerned with rumoured homoeroticism as a first grader. 

However, the popularity of this ship did carry over into the 2013-2015 Tumblr shipping boom. The emo fandom (or "bandom" as it was called) involving not only My Chemical Romance but other similar bands such as Fall Out Boy, Panic! At The Disco, and Pierce the Veil, found its hub on Tumblr. 

During this time, I did in fact listen to this style of music, but was focused a lot more on the anime side of Tumblr as mentioned earlier. Of course, I wasn't 13 years old like, "hey, this type of content might be harmful and can inadvertently perpetuate homophobic stereotypes," I just happened to care more about my silly little anime and ended up not getting involved. 

This ship does involve a discussion that the others don't, however. With Frank Iero and Gerard Way, there is quite often a certain sentiment of, "Oh, they brought this upon themselves!" as the two band members very famously kissed during a show in 2007. In my opinion, though, this doesn't really justify all the obsessive shipping. If you look at Green Day, a band often grouped in with MCR as another famous pop punk group, the members don't follow too different of a trajectory. Billie Joe Armstrong has, on numerous occasions, kissed both of his fellow band members onstage- particularly Tré Cool, the drummer. And Billie Joe Armstrong is openly bisexual, which none of the members of MCR seem to be but some, or even all of Billie's bandmates, are too. 

You'd think Green Day would face a lot more shipping as the more persistent onstage homoeroticism and Billie Joe's openness about his sexuality would warrant more "substantiated" speculation. However, Green Day faces nowhere near as much shipping as My Chemical Romance. Why is this? I actually don't know. It might've been because Green Day has been around for over a decade longer and generally has an older fandom, but I really am not that sure. 

 It could also be because of the lower lack of potential for forced relationship dynamics. The members of Green Day are all less than a year apart in age and are even similar in height. However, Frank Iero is 4 years younger than Gerard Way, who is not only the frontman of My Chemical Romance, but also considered to be the group's intellectual and creative "leader". Even beyond that, Gerard Way is quite visibly taller, and the perceived power difference between the two of them definitely did not elude their fans. 

This difference could even be partly due to the lack of a "mystery" with Green Day. There's not as much to speculate as, well… the members of Green Day are already open about their sexual orientations. It might be that shipping in the Green Day fandom has less of a forbidden appeal for most people. 

Of course, I won't just keep repeating myself, but my previous points about forced relationship dynamics still stand.

4. Martin Freeman and Benedict Cumberbatch

Better known for their roles in BBC Sherlock as Sherlock and Watson, Martin Freeman and Benedict Cumberbatch unfortunately had their roles follow them well into real life. This is the example I know least about, so have these thoughts from a follower by the name of @indubitably-a-goblin, who had the following to say:

"the main issues i had with it were:

a) they were both married at the time, freeman to amanda abbington and cumberbatch to sophie hunter (in which both had children)

b) the main reasoning for it was their chemistry in the many projects they've done together. which is, shockingly, their Whole Job. They're actors! That's what they're supposed to do! if they weren't good at interacting then they wouldn't be good actors! i don't know how people can't understand this.

c) they're real people. we don't know them. we aren't friends with them. we aren't their family members. we have zero right to be pushing this onto them and ruining their friendship by doing so. (this one relates to most of the ships you've mentioned though)

d) healthy friendships between two men are ignored so plainly in most medias and in fandom. its obvious that these two men have a relationship, but that doesn't mean it's a romantic one.

e) its fine to ship their characters, but actors shouldn't be treated as less-than-human or some sort of prop. they're doing a job, and once they are off-screen, they aren't here for your entertainment."

I believe she did a great job of summing it up on her own, and for the sake of avoiding redundancy, I'll leave it at that!

5. Corpse Husband and Sykkuno- an emerging yet subtle example

I am absolutely positive you remember how popular the game Among Us was a couple of months ago. And with the popularity of this game, some of its most prominent content creators became the targets of online shipping- as is the case with YouTubers and streamers Corpse Husband and Sykkuno. 

Although the shipping involving these two creators is nowhere near as strong as it was/is with the examples above, I do think there is once again a reemergence of a common theme here. Whilst Sykkuno is known for his happy-go-lucky, almost "innocent" persona, Corpse Husband is the antithesis of this, known for his much darker and moodier personality. 

Do I even have to mention what the common theme seems to be?

Again, although the popularity of shipping - at least with real people - seems to have died down a bit since the Tumblr shipping boom of the early to mid 2010s, I do believe this example is worth mentioning. Even though the creators are still close, they have in fact expressed discomfort regarding the shipping, and I can only hope the internet as a whole lets their friendship blossom and exist naturally without obsessive speculation. 

My final thoughts

As explored in the essay:

The romanticisation of objects of queer trauma as a part of online shipping normalises queer trauma to both cishet and queer youth. 

Online shipping, especially at a high intensity, can end up negatively impacting the very relationships they pine over. 

The relationship dynamics often forced on mlm ships perpetuate homophobic stereotypes about non-heterosexual men. 

If anyone else has thoughts on this matter, do share! This essay is moreso an opinionated observational piece and isn't meant to be taken as fact but rather just as my thoughts on the matter. I hope it was useful as a reflective piece regardless!

Date of posting: June 16th 2021

[fuyupeach]

bakugou, kirishima, and todoroki’s reaction to the reader killing it during karaoke

a/n: i’ve had since u been gone by kelly clarkson on repeat and have been thinking of this prompt for a while LOL so ig this song in particular is inspiring me rn, hope you enjoy!! this was more of a self indulgent post lol

essentially all of these start with mina n the 1-a girls getting the reader to sing bc they know they have a nice voice

bakugou katsuki

Bakugou was being grumpy as usual (he had actually always been curious about karaoke but he would never admit that🙄), arms crossed and the same scowl on his face as always, quiet but definitely listening as Mina was shoving the mic in your hand and encouraging you to sing.

Your eyes dart to the side, heart beating a little faster at the suggestion. Sure, you had sang for fun whenever you were hanging out with Jiro and the other girls, but this situation was different.

It was the whole class this time.... but you’d be lying if you said you didn’t already have a song in mind. Taking a deep breath you look back at Mina and the other girls.

“Fine, but only if someone else joins me.” You say someone else, but your pointed stare at Mina says enough lmao

After you tell her the song in mind you both go👀👀 cause you already KNOW y’all are gonna eat this up

The moment the song starts playing and you get into it, this man gets entranced almost instantly LMAO (Kaminari notices and takes a pic bc Bakugou with his mouth dropping open was a sight to SEE BDHDJD)

“When I’m outside please don’t make me wait. The party started when we pull up to the gate—girl we so late~” You obviously feel much more comfortable performing with Mina, Bakugou’s eyes on you the entire time, unbeknownst to you. Your body is flowing and swaying with the beat, your voice soothing to his ears.

If he wasn’t already aware of his crush on you, he definitely couldn’t ignore it now💀 He’ll put up a front afterwards like he wasn’t jamming along in his own way while the rest of the class was singing along to the chorus and hyping you n Mina up.

Will DEFINITELY kick whoever’s nearby if they say something romantic or flirtatious about you afterwards bc DAMN they really didn’t know you had a presence like that, singing and dancing involved.

You can’t tell me Mina isn’t a ChloexHalle stan🤧 you both have seen the Do It challenge on tiktok so when the chorus comes and y’all are dancing his eyes (again) are literally stuck on you like glue.

“It’s a homies only kind of mood~” Man got goosebumps

Will tell you you did “Okay, I guess” not looking at you while everyone else was complimenting Mina and you

If you’re already dating when this happens he’ll ask you to sing more often.

kirishima eijirou

The moment No Scrubs comes on and you start he’s got the biggest smile on his face. If you didn’t already know he had a crush on you anyone else that didn’t know him would know he did the moment they saw him lmao

“No, I don't want your number, no, I don't want to give you mine and no, I don't want to meet you nowhere, no, I don't want none of your time” Kirishima is just in awe before he remembers that if he wants to cheer you on he actually needs to MOVE HHDJDJD PLS

I’m talking lovesick expression on his face as he whoops and cheers you on, clapping and talking about how manly and attractive you were while you were singing, swiping away at tears

He’s so sweet I love him

He didn’t know too much about the song (you and Mina explained to him what a scrub was in more detail afterwards), but even if he didn’t he definitely had an idea if your performance with Mina was any indicator (singing it literally gives me such an ego boost everytime it’s so good)

He’ll try to push away the thoughts that come to his mind whenever you would sway your hips or when you sang a lyric in a certain tone, he’s gotta stay respectful

Will definitely be blushing as he compliments you, he was blushing pretty much the entire time you were singing and dancing

If he hadn’t already asked you out, he definitely would after everyone left. His feelings for you pretty much surged sky high, even more if that was possible

“You’re so amazing. W-would you go out with me?”

todoroki shouto

Just like the other two, Todoroki is just as in awe with his eyes glued on you. He was definitely caught off guard. While he didn’t expect you to be a bad singer, he didn’t expect to love your voice as much as he did

To be honest, it went by too fast for him

He wanted to hear more of your voice, he really did love it

While his face is generally stoic while you sing, if you look closer he’s got the faintest of smiles tugging at his lips

He’s happy to see you enjoy yourself as you dance with Mina, vibes on maximum

Again, you can’t tell me Mina doesn’t stan SZA either

“Now I’m wavy~~~” you both sing, smiles on your faces, bodies swaying

I think the best way to describe his reaction was basically a mental glitch LMAODHDHSJ he was just 🧍🏽‍♀️🧍🏽‍♀️ as you were doing your thing. He definitely wasn’t complaining though

It takes Midoriya elbowing him as you walk back to your seat next to Todoroki as he asks him if he also thought you and Mina did great to snap out of it

He has to blink a few times to get himself together as you sit down, nodding.

I’m going to give Todoroki the benefit of the doubt and say he already knew he had a small crush (not small anymore LOL) on you, heart beating a little faster as he turns to speak to you

“You did great, _____.”

[citrineghost]

On ADHD, Being Dramatic, and Being Lazy

Gather round everyone. It’s time for our every-few-monthsly post on ADHD by your local ADHD ghost. In this episode, we’re talking about ADHD and how it relates to “being dramatic” and “being lazy.”

On Being Dramatic

No doubt a lot of you have been told you’re being dramatic over the years. I know I have. There are a lot of reasons one might be dramatic, but they’re rarely about the drama.

If I’m to guess the origin of the word dramatic, I’d guess it probably has something to do with over exaggerating your response for the drama. I’m sure you’ve seen plenty of people being dramatic - on tiktok and vine, on youtube... drama calls for dramaticism.

Do you want to know what isn’t dramatic? Genuine reactions. That’s right - genuine reactions, inherently, cannot be categorized as dramatic or hyperbolic. There is nothing about them that is being overdone with the intention of getting attention or entertaining other people. So, let’s talk a bit about how this conflation has hurt us as a community.

Growing up, everything I did was “dramatic.” Crying because I didn’t want to do more chores was dramatic. Having a panic attack because there was a spider in the room was dramatic. Freaking out because I needed people to stop touching me was dramatic. Getting angry when my mother made jokes about my sex life as a teen was dramatic (and apparently abusive, but that’s neither here nor there). Nothing I did that involved a noteworthy amount of emotion was anything, if not dramatic.

On Being Lazy

I know a lot of you have also been labeled as lazy over the years. “Lazy” is the diagnosis everyone loves to give to those who don’t do enough, in their eyes. If you “could have” done something and then “chose not to,” you’re lazy... right?

Growing up, I was lazy too. I was lazy for avoiding housework. I was lazy for not wanting to brush my teeth. I was lazy because I didn’t turn in my homework. I was lazy for staying in bed, on my computer, most of the day.

If I’d only just “applied myself,” or if I would just “put in the work,” then I would be respectable to the people around me. But, because I wasn’t “willing” to put in the time and effort, I was lazy.

Why Is Emotion Dramatic?

The short answer is: it’s not. The real question is, why do people seem to perceive emotion as being dramatic? These are real emotions, after all - real and genuine feelings that are being dismissed as playacting. There are a number of reasons.

Why Are We Lazy?

Again, the short answer is: most people aren’t. The question here is, why do people see others not doing something and assume it’s because they simply don’t want to put in the work? Why do they not seek out an explanation or consider other alternatives? There are a number of reasons for that too.

The Answer...

Editing to put a Read More here because it’s very long

(TW for each of these sections in their name)

1. Sexism

At its core, seeing emotional outbursts or responses as dramatic is inherently rooted in sexism. Whether you’re a boy or a girl, man or woman, if your emotions are being mocked, it’s almost definitely because of our world’s history of sexism and relating emotion to women, who are “illogical” and “just want attention.”

And “real men” work! They work hard! They work long hours! They put themselves into an early grave, with pride, by never sitting down to rest! For this very reason, women, housewives of decades past, were expected, after a long day of doing housework and caring for the children - things that are just as exhausting as a full time job - to dote on their husbands who had just returned from work expecting a hot meal and a beer to be ready for them. Her work is devalued. It wasn’t grueling or tiring or important. It was just “women’s work.” A wife who does all of the housework and child rearing and fails to provide a hot meal and a warm body to her husband is “lazy.”

This is further shown to affect men as well. We can see, as early as non-manual labor-based jobs existed, the men who took them were lesser. Men who work at computers are seen as nerds and geeks - weak. Men who work in universities, coming up with new solutions to our medical needs and discovering the mathematics we need for space travel and advanced technology - they’re weak too. They’re unimportant to society because they’re not willing to get their hands dirty. Those men who prefer artistry are called gay and seen as disposable. It is irrelevant to the conservative man that his artistic counterpart designs everything that fills his home and office - that without artists we would have nothing.

2. Racism and classism

You might be surprised, but racism and classism both have their hands in this as well. I’m talking full on systemic oppression. The ability for people in power to look down on those they see as beneath them for being emotional or passionate about a topic or incident is all about power. You can see a million examples of this today. POC are called dramatic or are implied to be blowing things out of proportion by conservative white people because they want equal rights and feel they’re being treated unfairly. Their emotions are dismissed as irrational and dramatic. 

The cries of the poor, whether white or of color, are mocked. They have no reason to be having the emotions they’re having because they wouldn’t be in the position they’re in if they weren’t “lazy.” After all, only lazy people don’t have money. Only lazy people can’t get work. If they had just “applied themselves,” they would have an income, a home, and ample food on the table.

3. Ableism

And, last but not least, we have ableism. The neurotypical and abled people of the world, at large, cannot understand the experiences of the disabled, both emotionally(those with mental illnesses, disorders, and so on(whether or not certain disorders can be categorized as a disability in a just society is another topic entirely, but they are regarded that way, generally)) and physically.

If you have sensory overload, you are being irrational. It doesn’t matter to a NT if this is caused by an actually chemically different response in your brain. It doesn’t matter if it’s Real To You. To them, it doesn’t make sense, and so you deserve no compassion for your experience. Your emotional response is dramatic.

If you have executive dysfunction, you are simply choosing not to do your work. It doesn’t matter that there is an actual reason, buried in you somewhere, for why you have become Stuck. It doesn’t matter if you feel crippled by this aspect of your life. They see that you have neglected to do something they deem easy. Therefore, you are “lazy.”

ADHD and Being Dramatic

For those of us with ADHD, being called dramatic is a very familiar experience. After a while, we begin to internalize it. We must be dramatic, right? After all, so many different people have told us we are - and for good reason. We do tend to get overly emotional.

So the question is, why? Why do we get overly emotional? Why are our emotions so much different than those of our NT peers?

1. Lack of Emotional Regulation

A big part of ADHD, which is not yet a diagnostic criteria, is our emotional disregulation. ADHD, inherently, comes with some amount of disregulation in our emotions. We have a hard time controlling the emotions that we feel and managing the intensity of them. They may come across as overly intense, or they may seem subdued, both for reasons we can’t possibly figure out as individuals. This disregulation is entirely out of our control, happening at a neurological level. Our brain chemicals don’t work as they should. But, no matter how unregulated our emotions are, they are still real. We do still feel them, exactly as intensely as we think we do. Disregulated does not mean made up.

2. RSD

If you knew about RSD before, or you’ve read my last post on ADHD (under my tag adhdghost), which has gained some popularity, you already know what this means. For those who don’t, RSD is short for Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria. This condition plagues something like 99.9% of people with ADHD (while not being ADHD exclusive.) It comes with the lack of emotional regulation and means we have a reaction, that seems out of proportion (or “dramatic”), relative to the thing that caused it.

In short, RSD episodes can look like an entire breakdown, a very sudden loss of any self esteem or confidence, the feeling that you are certain someone now hates you or has secretly always hated you, and/or an immediate need to get rid of the thing that caused it. These episodes are caused by any kind of perceived failure or disappointment. They can be caused by someone whose opinion or relationship we value who gives us a slightly judgmental look, someone saying they don’t understand why we like the thing we’re interested in, or even not living up to our own expectations. These episodes frequently lead to emotional outburts, episodes, breakdowns, and tears. Naturally, all of this is “dramatic,” despite it being very real and painful for those experiencing it.

3. Combination with Other Things

Emotional disregulation can interact with other parts of our lives as well. For instance, I have a lot of phobias. My reactions to seeing or being around the things that terrify me can be even more intense than how most people react to their phobias. They can cause anxiety attacks, emotional breakdowns, and lasting fear for hours or days after. My recovery from these instances is hindered by my inability to regulate the feelings they caused.

Emotional disregulation can also interact with triggers, trauma, sensory problems, etc.

ADHD and Being Lazy

And of course, if you struggle with ADHD, you want to know, “Why am I so lazy?” The answer is: you’re not! Laziness is a made up word. Laziness was created to pass blame onto people who struggle to do things that more typical people can accomplish with ease.

So, what is the reason we struggle to do these seemingly simple tasks?

1. Executive Dysfunction

This is The Big One. Of all the things that can cause an inability to do things, executive dysfunction is the Achilles heel of ADHD. Because ADHD causes a difficulty with prioritizing, rewarding actions with no immediate reward, and creating a list of steps for us to take (something that comes naturally to NT people), we sometimes get “Stuck.”

This feeling of being stuck may look like us just having fun and avoiding our responsibilities. You may be Stuck right now, scrolling through tumblr mechanically even though you’ve been needing to pee for three hours. Naturally, you’ve been wanting to go to the bathroom... you just don’t know how.

To a NT, this sounds ridiculous. “Just get up and go?!” I’m sure you can imagine your parents saying, when they simply don’t understand. The truth is, tumblr can be a nightmare for executive function. It endlessly scrolls, giving you post after post. There’s no natural stopping point. You keep an eye out for a natural end to this activity, but it’s hard to find the right post to stop on. If you find those, “This is your sign to go to bed,” posts helpful - otherwise locked into the activity of scrolling regardless of whether you want to - you might be struggling with executive dysfunction.

This inability to “queue” our actions or prioritize what we need to do, and in what order, can wreak all kinds of havoc in our lives. You remember you didn’t really understand that equation the math teacher explained earlier. You know today’s homework is related to its use. Therefore, you cannot start your homework. There are a number of possible solutions floating around your head. Maybe the book will explain it better. Maybe your parents know how to do this and you could ask them. Maybe you could Google it. It’s possible the homework is about something else. But, if it is, what if you don’t understand that? Maybe you should ask your teacher before class?

Even though you have all of these solutions in your head, because you don’t know which solution is the best solution, you find yourself unable to do any of them. You show up to class with no homework and your teacher gives you a disappointed look. “I don’t understand why you don’t just apply yourself more. You’re a very smart student.” The remark brings you to holding back tears, because you want, with every fiber of your being, to apply yourself and make your teacher proud, but you simply don’t know how.

This is the destructive nature of executive dysfunction, and it is not something to be taken lightly.

2. Distraction

For those with ADHD, the inability to regulate external stimuli makes focusing incredibly hard. You wake up one morning and plan to start that English paper after breakfast. You go to get yourself some cereal. You’re out of milk. You decide to make toast instead. You burn your toast because you lost track of time for just 30 seconds. You go to throw it away, feeling an overwhelming amount of guilt over the two pieces of bread you wasted. The trash is overflowing. You decide to take it outside. It’s a really nice day out. Maybe you should take your dog for a walk. You haven’t taken her on a walk in a while and you’re just now feeling motivated to, so you should take advantage of that. You go to retrieve your dog and take her for a walk. When you bring her back in, you go to get her treats from the shelf in the laundry room. Oh yeah, you’d been meaning to do laundry. You go to get your laundry hamper from your room and notice there’s a bunch of laundry on the floor. You begin picking up the laundry from the floor. You may as well tidy up the other things on the floor as well. You finally get around to taking your laundry to the washer. You’re out of soap. Maybe you ought to make a run to the grocery store. You take ten minutes to find your keys and wallet and then head out to the grocery store. When you get there, you’ve forgotten what it was you needed. “Oh, right! I’m out of milk!” You go and retrieve milk. When you get to the checkout and the cashier rings you up, you suddenly remember you need laundry soap. Well, it’s too late now. You’ll have to do laundry tomorrow. You can’t risk the cashier giving you a tired look by asking them to wait. You go home and make some cereal. You can’t really write while you eat, so you open tumblr. you scroll through tumblr for a while. Your cereal gets soggy, you notice, disappointed. You see a tumblr post reminding you that you forgot to order something important online that you need to get here as soon as possible. The day continues in this way until you finally realize at 5pm that you never started your paper. “It’s so late now... I’ll just start it tomorrow morning,” you tell yourself. Rinse and repeat.

If you relate to this, you might want to consider researching ADHD a bit, because this is a very typical ADHD experience.

3. Hyperfixation and Hyperfocus

The last prominent reason why people with ADHD are seen as lazy has to do with a cycle in hyperfixation and hyperfocus.

If you don’t already know, hyperfixations are those interests you have that fill you with an overwhelming love and which take up an incredible amount of your time, energy, and brain space. These could be fandoms, hobbies, characters, games, or otherwise.

Hyperfocus, on the other hand, can be related to hyperfixations or things that aren’t hyperfixations. Hyperfocus is when you get “locked in” on a task and can’t seem to put it down. If you started this post not knowing how long it was and find yourself still raptly reading, completely ignoring the world around you, you may have hyperfocused on it. If you ever start cleaning and just can’t stop until the whole house is clean, despite your lack of regularly cleaning for over a month, you are hyperfocusing on cleaning. If you write a 20k word fic in one night, you are hyperfocusing.

Hyperfocusing can leave you completely unaware of the world around you, causing you to neglect your own basic needs, such as food, bathroom breaks, water, and social interaction. 

Because people with ADHD are able to occasionally apply themselves to such an extreme degree, NT people don’t understand why ADHD people are unable to apply themselves to other things as well. The reason we can’t is because we do not regulate our hyperfocus. Hyperfocus comes from tasks that are giving us serotonin, to make up for our brains inability to give serotonin in the way it should - in the way NT brains do. Emptying the dishwasher just felt really good. The next thing you know, you’re filling it with more dishes and wiping off counters and sweeping the floor and, “oh god, it looks so nice what if I just-” and then you move on to the laundry and the living room and the bedroom and then somehow 6 hours have passed. You don’t know how it happened, but now your house is clean and you feel amazing... but also tired and hungry. So you go make some food and then pass out on the couch.

So, when NT people see this kind of laser focus, they demand to know why you couldn’t do that simple math assignment, or why you haven’t been returning their texts, or why you couldn’t apply the same level of energy and enthusiasm on that really boring geography project. They demand to know why you’re so “lazy” the rest of the time.

There’s also the element of hyperfixation. It is the ultimate distraction. Your parents tell you to do the dishes and you say you will. Suddenly, you’ve found a fanfiction about your hyperfixation and you can’t stop reading it. It’s 60k words long and it will take you all day, but you’ll find a break to do your chores somewhere in there, right?

Your mom is suddenly knocking on your door what feels like 5 minutes later, but it’s been an hour. She wants to know why you didn’t do the dishes yet. You’re upset at yourself, but you lash out at her, because you’re unable to regulate your emotions. “I’ll do it in a minute!” you say loudly from behind your door. She walks off, irritated. You ask yourself why you can’t just do it now. Why does it feel impossible to tear yourself away? Your hyperfixation is the ultimate creator of hyperfocus. It rules you.

Before you know it, it’s midnight. You’ve finished the fic. It was amazing. You realize with dread that you still haven’t done the dishes, so you sneak out to the kitchen, hoping your parents have gone to bed. They have, but you find the dishes have already been done by someone else. Suddenly, you’re holding back tears from the RSD episode this has triggered. You ruined everything. You disappointed your parents. You’re a lazy and terrible child and they deserve better.

The truth is, you’re none of those things. In fact, you’re struggling with one of the most difficult mental blocks someone can have. But to others, you’re just making excuses. To others, you should have been able to just do the dishes and then go back to reading. But you know it’s not that easy. But why?

It’s ADHD, Babey!

If this post is hitting hard in a way that feels like your life is being splayed out before you, you might just have ADHD.

The fact is you are not dramatic and you are not lazy. You are struggling with a lot of ADHD symptoms that are making functioning in a neurotypical world incredibly difficult. This world was designed by and for NT people. Your worth is not based in how you live up to their expectations.

If you think you might have ADHD, it might be time to ask your doctor about getting an ADHD evaluation. Please check out my last post (the one i mentioned is under my tag adhdghost) to get more information on RSD and on getting evaluated.

An Important Note

Many experiences and struggles caused by ADHD are also present in other disorders. For example, RSD can be seen frequently in autism as well as in anxiety, depression, and PTSD. Sensory overload, emotional disregulation, executive dysfunction, and so on, can all be present in things other than ADHD. If you want to know if you fit the criteria for ADHD, go check out the criteria on the ADDitude website, which is a great source for ADHD related information.

[myempirepro-blog]

Disrespectful Wife? FINALLY What To Do… (5 Tips)

Welcome back to LOLAandOLA.com.  As usual, we’ve received your messages either in the comment area or to questions@LOLAandOLA.com

--> READ THE BLOG POST HERE https://lolaandola.com/disrespectful-wife-what-to-do/

  --> WATCH VIDEO VERSION HERE https://youtu.be/TW1iZywSVAc

And we are happy to continue to share tips from our 18+ years experience in this game of marriage and relationships.

  Today, we are responding to 3 different comments and messages. And the first one says…

  “Going through this right now. We still do things at home together, stop going out due to the separation…”

  And here is the second one… 

  “I have all the 5 signs that show a wife's disrespect to her husband. Now I'm wondering how to deal with those wives with these signs.”

  This was actually a comment response to a video we did a while back that has 20,000+ views on it.  

  Just search “5 Signs Your Wife DOESN’T RESPECT YOU LOLA and OLA” on Youtube after watching this.  It comes right up.

  Here is a quick recap of the 5 signs of a disrespectful wife that was mentioned in that video: 

  1 - She utters rude remarks

2 - She gives you the silent treatment

3 - She doesn't sought after your advice and opinion

4 - She seems to honor other people's advices and opinions more

5 - She doesn't defend you when necessary

  And then there was this comment…

  “My wife started to disrespect me in secret back in 2022.  She started lying and twerking on TikTok, commenting on guys' pictures and videos etc.  

  I just found this out this year after a big argument and I made one just to check and I couldn't believe that I was watching my wife.  

  So I made her delete TikTok and I got on her Facebook and almost the same stuff. But when I asked her to delete it, she blocked me and told me I need to act my age. 

  And that people onTikTok don't mean anything.  

  I said of course they do if you post this kinda’ content, then liking their comments when honestly they are calling you a 304 and me a fool.”

.

As usual, we have consolidated the answer into 5 tips to help you deal with a disrespectful wife even in the middle of a separation.

  Let’s get into it.

Tip Number 5

OLA - Focus on Rebuilding Friendship

  This is probably not the time to start buying flowers and begging her to work on the relationship.  I want you to focus on being comfortable with each other even if it  doesn’t involve romance.

  The fear that will probably creep through you is this.  “What if she actually moves on?”

  The question is moving on to what?  After all, you need a confidence that showcases that you are the best option for her anyway.

  Just trust the process and let go of everything you believed about marriage except friendship for now.  

  The strength of the friendship you build in this period has no choice but to spread to everything else way better than obsession and attachments could.

  It’s always good to wait for the decision maker of the present status to decide to change that decision.  It’s even better when you emotionally attract them to do so.  

  Tip Number 4

LOLA - Signs Are Symptoms

  People can argue this with me… but when women go on social media to twerk, it’s a sign of insecurity and low self esteem.

  She is most likely crazing unhealthy attention and it’s to do so when she doesn’t value what she has at home.

  The point is that there are deeper issues at play and what you are seeing as signs are ordinary symptoms.

  Guess what happens when you treat symptoms. It will give you a fake sense of relief but it’s coming back.

  And when it comes back, the symptoms are going to be worse because the disease never left. It might even be cancerous and spread to other areas that weren't previously infected.

  So don’t focus too much on the symptoms or signs.  A root cause analysis is needed.

  Tip Number 3

OLA - You Need Some Space

  Let me guess.  I know what you are thinking.

  You are thinking that married couples, space and distance don’t go together.  But that’s actually not how attraction works.

  One of the signs of low levels of attraction is disrespect and in Nigeria slangs we can also call that “see finish”.

  When a relationship is no longer exciting for whatever reasons, it’s easy to find laying around convenient reasons to be disrespectful.

  Put it like this.  A woman who is in love with you will find it hard to be disrespectful even if there are good excuses… I’m not sure if there is a good excuse.

  Distance makes the heart fonder.  It may be as simple as taking each other for granted for being around too much.

  You need space.  If you are not careful, she will be asking you for space very soon.

  Tip Number 2

LOLA - Say it Once & Let it Go

  When you say what you have to say to address a disrespect, make sure you mean it.

  A sign that you don’t really mean it or believe it is when you have to repeat yourself.

  If a disrespectful wife is not responding to your request after saying it more than 2 times, there is a chance that form of communication is not working.

  There is also a chance that there are deeper issues that you will likely not find out because you are busy talking too much.

  Your rare ability to let it go after saying what you have to say no more than 2 times demonstrates self confidence, self worth, self respect and more.

  Speaking of self respect…

  Tip Number 1

OLA - Focus on Self-Respect

As we were preparing for this episode, a further elaboration came through the comment section to one of the earlier comments.

  And I quote…

  “I know she has narcissistic tendencies cause we'll be fine now… as long as I don't bring it up… if I do… she say things like may we should be apart if I don't trust her or threaten not to talk to me if I bring it up

  She ignores me basically.  We lost our apartment and when she left, she took the kids and my car.  I just moved back to South Carolina and started working there.

  But we haven't had sex in a month.  She said she is not in the mood because of the situation we are in.

  We will be fine for a week or two, then she'll go run behind people who only wanna talk to her because she's driving around in a 2021 Charger and kinda’ ignore me.

  Then my trust issues come into play and she starts threatening to leave me again or she'll say something to damage my ego more than it already is.

  I got her to take down the other Facebook page and the one she had pictures of me on but she still blocked me because I’d be starting with people on her page because someone liked or commented on her picture or post.

  I'm feeling better now though.  I want my wife back… the girl I married 4 years ago and got 4 kids with and been with for 12 years.”

  You see.  There is so much going on in that comment that points towards lack of self-respect.  There are just some things that you will never have time for when you have adequate self-respect.

  At least, you will be willing to let a disrespectful wife go until she figures out where her priorities lie if she is confused about that.

  But I get it.  It’s easier said than done.  

  Nonetheless, you have to understand that your wife is only capable of mimicking and matching the level of respect you have for yourself.

  We are speaking from experience.  

  We share our own story inside the book "GET MY MARRIAGE BACK" which  you can download for free at www.GetMyMarriageBack.com

  Please support this video by hitting the thumbs up and share with us below what you'd like us to cover on the next video.

Check out this episode!

[lockdownuk]

 Lockdown Diary Part 12

A personal account during the lockdown in the UK due to the Covid-19 outbreak.

23/03/2020 8:30pm Boris Johnson, UK Prime Minister, gives a live address to the nation to, effectively, put the country on lockdown to stem the spread of the deadly coronavirus strain, Covid-19.Many of us have been self-isolating for days but this latest development within the UK in reaction to the pandemic feels very serious and very scary. I decided to keep a simple diary and where better but online. Day 331: Yesterday, I took some photos, as usual, on my walk. I posted some of them today and one lady, in the Oundle Chatter FB group, commented that she’s isolating and only logs on to see if I’ve posted pictures. I am totally flattered. I forgot to mention that, on Friday, I told Lynda at Woodfords I’d take number 13. As I have mentioned, it’s not perfect, and the neighbours are a concern, but I can’t risk losing it. If worse comes to worst, I’ll find somewhere else!

Day 332: I am knackered. Nothing out of the ordinary today but I feel shattered as I type. It’s 9.40pm and tea is on the go. I reckon I’ll be eating, washing up and going to bed. The last couple of nights, it’s been gone 1am before I’ve put TikTok away and gone to sleep. That must be it!

Day 333: Typing on day 334. After my evening walk I sorted out haggis and shed loads of veg and did a little bit of work for the POC for a new VPN solution at work (Okta Verify) so I completely forgot to type this! Day 334: Got a little telling off from Sueanne for working late last night which is hypocritical but, also, fair enough. Gave dad a call this afternoon and we chatted that Rita has had her vaccination but the different one (AstraZeneca) to dad’s (Pfizer). There are rumours that the AZ one gives harsher side effects but Rita, who had hers on Monday, is fine, apart from a slightly sore arm. Dad and I agree that some people just need to whinge!

Day 335: Typing on day 336. The evenings are really staring to draw out. I know that’s an old man thing to say but it really has a positive effect on me, most espeically due to not having to get my torch out on evening walks! So, I can ditch the walking around town in favour for country/river side. Finished up watching Lions for Lambs and Way Dogs. Two great films. Have a video chat with Fog. Always good to catch up. Day 336: Up at 2pm (it was a fucking late one last night, gone 4am). Roger’s birthday today so, hopefully me, him and Fog will video call later. Day 337: Good chat with Fog and Rog last night. Even though it was Roger’s birthday, he’s off the booze. He told us he was drinking far too much, far too often, far too early in the day. Good on him! I was up at not long after midday today which allowed me time for a fucking long walk - just under 10 miles.

Day338: Yesterday’s walk allowed me to soak up CYHSY’s new album, New Fragility. It’s very good. Boris has announced how the latest lockdown (3rd) will be eased. I haven’t even digested the details but FB is awash with memes about pubs opening and the Virtual Ship Group has the usual contenders bleating on about booking tables down the pub. I fear the yoyo effect will continue - lockdown/relax/lockdown - as people don’t respect that relaxing doesn’t mean back to pre-pandemic normality. I hope I am wrong, not least because the vaccine will counteract the stupidity.

Day 339: Morning routine, work, walk, lunch, work, walk, Tesco’s (no Sapporo), Morrison’s (no Sapporo), Tesco’s, home, put shopping away, put tea on, shower, eat, type this (11.40pm), bed.

Posh won away to Plymouth 0-3. With Lincoln only drawing, Posh sit top of the table by a point.

Day 340: Wolf Alice released a new track today, first played on Annie Mac. I have been thinking, a couple of times recently, when walking and listening to the Spotify Discover Weekly PL, whether WA are up to anything and, low and behold, they release The Last Man on Earth, which is excellent, and also there’s a new album out in June. Brilliant. Day 341: I actually cannot wait until the year is up on this diary...it’s becoming boring to me! Anyhow, a lady called Kate Doherty, who runs a Facebook page for making scrubs and stuff for the NHS, has messaged me asking if she can use one of my photos for it! Rachel posted on the Virtual Pub asking ‘How are you feeling everyone?’ or words to that effect. One answer I gave was long the lines of ‘sad that I am wishing my life away in this pandemic but glad it’s Friday tomorrow’. Hilarious but too true for comfort!

Day 342: Friday, at fucking last. Sueanne, in her update in the morning Sumo, said she was letting us all go at 3pm. I actually wasn’t sure if it was serious - it certainly surprise Jon. Anyway, she was serious but, with my workload, including Olga’s ticket, I finished up at 4.45pm. It did allow me to get out walking earlier than usual and the sunset was superb. Banners posted on FB asking if anyone could give him a lift to Corby early in the morning. Tim Sanders commented that Karen is going at 9am. That, with his recently updated profile pic taken in her kitchen, pretty much makes me jump to an obvious conclusion, that they are shacked up. And, I have to say, I am gutted. As implied before in this blog/diary, I dunno why I would be so gutted about her moving on, but I am. And with Tim??? That really hurts - that’s stupid - I’m nearly 55 years fucking old, FFS, but hurt it fucking well does. As I type, nursing a beer, I feel lost, lonely, alone and fucking sad. Day 343: A few beers, 21 Jump Street, good music and a few smokes cheered me up a little last night and, when I woke and got up today (1pm-ish) I didn’t feel quite as glum as yesterday. However, I am pretty much in the doldrums.  My new Waterproof jacket from Regatta arrived today (£35 instead of £80) and it’s mint. Wore it, and shorts with my new Oz boot covers, which worked a treat, on a 14.5km walk. That long walk coupled with cleaning my bedroom and changing the bed clothes has done me in! Beer, dinner and Inception are on the cards.

Day 344: Posh won yesterday 2-1 against Wigan after going 0-1 down, Lincoln lost away to Plymouth, so there’s a four point gap. I missed calls from dad so I rang him back while on my walk. We chatted about Paul who, Sam told me via Messenger, spent the night in hospital due to a mini stroke. A hell of a lot does seem to befall him! I hope he’s OK, mostly for Romiley’s sake.

Day 345: Very busy Monday at work made busier by Mark being off; otherwise, bog standard Monday. Day 346: I was contacted by text to book my vaccination...Friday at 2.50pm at Stanground!  During my evening walk I listened to Creedance Clearwater Revival’s album Cosmo’s Revival (all because I caught a little of Tropic Thunder on telly at the weekend and Shazamed Run Through the Jungle, which is on the album). One of the tracks is a cover of Heard it Through the Grapevine. I can’t believe how good it is! Posh drew away to Oxford (0-0). Lincoln lost at home to Fleetwood and are now 3rd (Lol). Hull are now 2nd, 3 points behind but they’ve played two more games. It’s looking promising - Posh have 15 more games to go.

Day 347: Busy at work yet again, so I shall start not putting that comment in this diary as 1. it’s boring, 2. the norm and 3. boring. My exercise routine begins most days with jogging on the spot (3 reps of 50 with knees higher each time), stretches, 15 toe touches with a reach up, 15 press ups. Then a 26 times stair climb with 15 press ups and 15 toe touches afterwards. I also do the 15 of each after each walk. So, quite a bit of activity compared to a year ago. Makes me think what fucking size I’d be if I didn’t do all this stuff ‘cos I eat like a horse. Day 349: Another FB spat with Bellingsea. Apparently I’m comfortable in lockdown where she, bless her, is losing out from the government because she has her own business but, in the same breath, all the money shelled out in furlough schemes should go to the NHS. She should make her fucking mind. Then, when I pointed out that the CJRS probably has prevented the suicie rate increasing, as she likes to think it’s higher than the Covid19 death rate, she dismissed this completely. I cannot abide gobby, ill thought out, reactionary bollocks, especially on social media. That young lady is a fine example of what is worst of her generation. Rant over. I am job hunting a bit and have one decent sniff at a £43k job at CDW (phone call scheduled tomorrow with the recruiter) plus Ash sent me the description of a tech analyst role at his place (HelpSystems) which is paying up to £45k.

Day 350: Typing on Day 351. Had the vaccine, AstroZeneca. Went smoothly enough - it was like a production line at the Stanground surgery. I then took the opportunity to nip to Morrison’s (in Walton) to stock up on Sapporo (as posted about on FB by Heather Davies) but there wasn’t any, FFS. I then later found out, from Badger on FB, that there are two Morrison’s in Boro. This, I actually already knew as the other one is on the way to the potato plant I was interviewed at for the Greenvale AP job...and it’s just down the road from Stanground. More ‘FFS’! The evening was spent eating, drinking and watching shite (The Negotiator) before bed at well past 4am.

Day 351: I’ve worked out that this diary will finish on 20th March but it started on 24th, I know not how that can happen, but happen it will. I find myself feeling really rather down today and I don’t know why. Well, I do, but why more so today?  I spoke with dad today. The main topic of conversation was Paul. Dad has a hard time believing everything that seems to happen to him and, in a phone call with Sam in the week, mentioned that perhaps Paul should take regular exercise to help with his general health. Cue Samantha telling dad that paul is a black belt in judo and has won mountain bike competitions. Jeez Sam, wtf? And  now dad believes Paul is duping his daughter! I felt like crap when I got up today (just gone midday) and, rather than blame it totally on the booze, I think the vaccine had something to do with it. No matter, a couple of paracetamol and I set about my exercises and managed a 16.5km walk!

Day 352: Like so many times, either w/e or workday, I find myself dallying in bed. Today, the alarm woke me up (10.30am) and I just hit snooze and lie to myself that I’ll be up in just a minute. Just gone midday today. No matter (as long as I am not late for work) but I don’t seem to be able to get up and go without fucking about! Other than that, today has been a run of the mill Sunday apart from I set out to finish the app for the job at Ash’s place: unsuccessful. Oh, and I had an altercation with a cyclist on the path on the A605 between Oundle and Elmington. He had his kid in tow and that was his excuse for 1. not stopping when he saw me so as to allow me to find somewhere to let him pass (traffic and no verge), 2. not giving me 2m, 3. not having any common decency. Number 3 was the last thing I repeated at him as he cycled off. What a fucking cunt. Day 353: I know I am going to have to go over the whole diary blog and find where I have screwed up the day count before I reach day 365 which should be on March 23rd. At present rate it’ll be 3 days early. Finished the application for the job at Ash’s place. Things at RCI are OK but I am still on way less than Mark, still feel under a lot of pressure from Sueanne and we are all, most certainly, not just tech engineers. The lack of money for the amount I do is taking the piss. So, while I am very happy for the job, the work and the money I do get, it is time to move on when the right opportunity avails itself. I am hopeful that will be at HelpSystems. If Ash recommends it (as he did RCI) then I feel happy I can tick some of the boxes that RCI does; asides from what I state above, I do like RCI.

Day 354: Most the day I have been trying to sort the laptop out for a person coming off furlough. Fucking ballache! I hate not being in control of all the IT since it’s driven from the states (Okta trust, SCCM updates and s/w delivery). I messaged Charles Lister who I noticed on FB. He is a blast from the past, when I worked at AB Agri. Not the greatest gig ever but I did enjoy my time there. Posh lost at home to top place Hull 1-3. Lincoln only drew at home, so Posh are still second. Jeff called round today and dropped off some beers (Leffe!) and some clippers. Uh oh! Day 355: Sueanne is a good TL but not perfect. She sometimes forgets me and Mark have over 40 years experience between us and talks (down) to us as if we’re YTS. On a team meeting today, mentioning a ‘project’ she wants Mark to do, she told him it’s his opportunity to shine. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him so pissed off. I think, if Jon doesn’t sort out the team dynamic, there could be trouble.

Day356: I slated the Blue Marlin on FB and am getting a bit of flack. Plus I had a dig at Butterwick in the virtual pub group which might not go down too well. Oh well. Day 357: Cath (Willy’s missus) contacted me on messenger asking why I was leaving a bad review for the chippy, so I removed it. I also removed the post having a surreptitious dig at Butterwick. Coward or easy life, not sure which it is but, either way, less hassle. So, another Friday has made its way to the table...it is fucking scary what an old man thing it is I am gonna type....time is passing too fucking quick. But, so what? I am looking forward to a few beers - and, just for clarification I am saying (typing) this at 7 minutes to midnight, less than one beer in!

Day 358: Bog standard Saturday. Posh didn’t have a game; Lincoln lost.

Day 359: Bog standard Sunday. I started watching The Queen’s Gambit last night. It’s a 7 part series and I started by watching over three quarters of the 6th episode. Dick head. Stopped that and started from the beginning, watched the first one and a half episodes. Really, really good. Day 358: So, in trying to sort out the missing days in this blog diary, I have discovered that, when I tried to correct the entry’s day numbers, around day 98 or 99 or 100, by adjusting so that Day 1 could be seen as starting on March 23rd (when Lockdown was called by the PM) rather than Day 1 being the next day, I increased the day number count by one rather than decreasing it. So, I an adjusting here. So, we’re back to day 358. I had a real case of Monday morning woes. I really couldn’t get enthused about anything. Getting out of bed, exercising, work, life in general. It feels like I am going through motions - earning shit money in a job that gets more and more arduous, and boring, just to pay for the right to get up and do the same monotonous stuff each day. Thoroughly depressing. My mood has lightened throughout the day but the crux of my blues is still there. And I know if I wasn’t alone, it wouldn’t be an issue. And I also know being with anyone apart from K wouldn’t cure the loneliness. Again, thoroughly depressing, Day 359: Felt a little better today - not quite so hopeless. Had to do an online classroom for new VPN s/w today. Only half a dozen online with me but it was rather enjoyable maybe because it was something different.

Day 360: The girls are off work today for St. Paddy’s Day and it was a relaxed atmos in the SUMO but I was bloody busy all day. Other than that I have nothing of note to type. Oh, Posh won last night 1-0 at home to Portsmouth. Hull weren’t playing and Lincoln lost at home. Posh 2nd, 3 behind, 4 ahead on 65 points.

Day 361: Pete msg a few days ago about the Sam fender gig - meant to be in April at Brixton. Firstly, he suggests, and I agree, it’s too soon. Secondly...I cannot, for the life of me remember how it’s ended up at Brixton when the original gig, in 2019, postponed ‘cos he has laryngitis, was at Ally Pally. When I do a search in my emails, all it goes back to is Ticketmaster confirming my purchase for tix at Brixton in May 2020. I am well confused! I rang Posh Dave tonight. He seems in better spirits than last time - not perfect, but better. Day 362: It’s Friday. Sod wishing my life away, I am fucking glad this week’s gone by so quickly. I am looking forward to drinking until I am drunk and smoking until I am in a state. It’s 10.10pm and I have just arranged to have a chat with Fog later. It’s a good feeling when booze and good (virtual) company are on the menu. Day 363: Well, today when I dragged my sorry arse out of bed at 2pm, I resigned to not doing any exercise or walking at all. In fact, I started the day off by switching on the TV, having bread hot dogs for brekky and slumming it from the word go. The next thing I know, I’m doing my morning exercise routine, hating every minute and then setting off on a 9km walk. I think I am addicted! When I went for my walk, Posh were 0-2 up at Rochdale and Lincoln were 0-1 down at home plus England were doing very well in reply to india in the series final, and deciding, T20. Two hours later when I get home, Posh drew 3-3 (they were 3-2 down in the 90th minute, so not all bad!) and Lincoln drew and England lost. FFS! Day 364: It’s dawned on me that I am meant to moving to Havelock starting this week. Woodfords (well, Lynda) are fucking slow. I’ll call them tomorrow! I think renting two places for a week is the way to go. I have asked Lynda to ask the new landlord if I can have access for a few days before the 1st (April) but she is being slow in coming back with any news on that request! I asked, on FB, if anyone has any old newspapers (for packing crockery). Sharon Booker-Chester to the rescue! Dan’s setting up business on his own - he messaged today with his new emial address and that he’s getting a website up and running (d-macgroundworks.co.uk). I have asked about the small matter of him still being banned from driving!

Day 365: Dan got back to me, he’s going to have a labourer who will drive him around until his ban’s up (Jan/Feb).  I spoke with Jeanette from Woodford & Co today - the new house is a goer for definite and I have arranged to met Lynda there on Thursday (25th March) to sign the tenancy agreement. So, I’ll start renting there from that date which gives an overlap with here (No. 36) for a week so I can get moved in. I have Thursday and Friday, and the following Monday and Tuesday booked off and Simon’s OK with his van for Saturday. I have arranged with Sky to do all the TV and Broadband, so that’s in hand, I contacted Outfox the Market today about moving and they should get back to me - fingers crossed I’ll have gas and electricity for the weekend. I messaged K to get my spare set of keys dropped off. There’s a lot to do but it’s all looking good. I just hope I like the place as much as I did this one when I moved in! So, a year is up on this online diary - one year ago tomorrow was the start of the first lockdown. What a year! I’ve done a lot and a lot has happened. Without reading back over a year’s worth of diary entries, I hope it’s a reflection of all that has occurred albeit from a very personal point of view. It’s kind of fitting to stop a daily log after a year despite the pandemic still raging and a long way to go before I feel I could ever go out like it was before Covid-19. However, there’s definite light at the end of the tunnel - I have had my first vaccination, for example, I am about to move to a new home and Dan is making a major step in his life. Overall, I am happy where the year has ended up.

[buddy-scape]

What is BUDDY-SCAPE

Let’s face it, Mark Fuckerberg is a bitch, and when I say “bitch” I mean he has a feminine look about him, not that I’m slating LGBT, if anything I’m all for it! Happy pride month to all those involved btw, neither am I slating women or being sexist, I love my wife very much, including my 3 mother’s and my adopted daughter, but yea, Fuckerberg is a complete ponce, he couldn’t organise a gangbang in a convent, Facebook may be an overall site for people to come and chat and make new friends, or is it? Ok let’s recap on the flaws with Facebook. 1-nudes There has been many complaints in the past where women have had conversations with a man they only just fucking met, next thing they know their inboxes or pms have been inundated with pics of the phallic symbol! No decent self respecting lady wants to see it, put it away or chop it off! 2-bullying Let’s be honest, we all have our share of enemies right? But you just wanna go online and chat. Unfortunately despite your privacy settings, the only option you have is the ignore messages features, but should you one day check your other message box to see if let’s say, a long lost family member who is not on your buddy list tries to contact you they can only get through on that other inbox, they don’t have a phone number or email address for you yet so what do they do? So you go check to see if they get in touch and bang, before you know it, your enemies have found you and your pms are full of hate-FUCKING FAIL. 3-Facebook is possibly the most controlling and manipulative of social media ever to hit this planet! Some people just want to make new friends, even with strangers, After all that’s how you make friends in the first place, The olive branch is delivered, the recipient decides to accept, and from there can determine a whole new social relationship, be it common ground, interests or hobbies right? On the other hand not everybody was to be social with strangers and may feel uncomfortable with that hand of friendship so they just may decline politely and walk away! Now Facebook is like that, But they got Add or Block. Now You will get some that will accept others might block you, But sometimes the Facebook algorithm will not even let you add people you have known for years, it will often issue warnings and if you try to make too many new friends it will restrict your account by what we often call Facebook jail, which is an algorithm put in place to limit people’s activity on this site, so really it’s the kind of social network that won’t let you be social. And who wants to be told who they can and can’t have as friends? Not something a British person wants to be told by an American is it? There is also a freedom of speech issue on here. Nobody wants to be trolled or told what to do by politically correct morons. But because of strict features in place on this site you can’t have an opinion, I have noticed incidents where someone has posted a perfectly innocent comment or photo on here, And some spiteful troll has reported it! Thing is Facebook is all automated, it doesn’t have moderators doing a Santa clause watching for who is naughty or nice, it has a bunch of codes and algorithms that tell it that. Or does it? People have been reported for posting something perfectly harmless as a pet pic or something else innocent, but along comes some spiteful bastard and it gets taken down for violating community standards! But you will get some dolly bird with a selfie showing a bit too much, and you try to report it, Facebook comes back with, it doesn’t go against our community standards, How fucked up is that? Now the upsides to Facebook jail is if you get a bully or someone doing something inappropriate on there they are sent to Facebook jail! Only problem is they are let out later to re-offend! 4-Inbox or Pm I have to give Facebook it’s due, It does completely filter out porn or nudity on the timeline,you try to post anything sexual on your main wall, be sure it will be taken down. But what about the personal messages? Five gets you ten that some of you or most of you on

here have had some kind of outside harrasment in PM! You have had porn bots, nudes,threats or other kinds of unpleasant stuff, you try to report it but before you get a chance to screen shot it as evidence, your cyber assailant has removed the message via this new fucking un-send button! Now un-send is quite handy if 1-you sent a pm to wrong person 2-you had a typing error Or 3-you sent a file or msg in error. But let me tell you the problem with it. As stated if you have had for example some perve showing off his dick, before you can get a chance to screenshot and report it he romved it, so really the un-send button is not very helpful! 5-privacy Facebook has had repeated issues regarding human rights and privacy. There’s been numerous reports where your data and accounts are leaked to third parties, this is unacceptable. 6-bots These are bloody pests that spam your inbox linking you to paid porn sites, scams or malicious content and malware and all because Facebook leaked your private data! Media Facebook never seems to pay much attention if you post your favourite music via YouTube. But what if you want to share a favourite song on your timeline in the form of an MP3? And why not? It worked for MySpace users! But try to do it on Facebook and they come down on you like a ton of bricks regarding copyright warnings! Now what puzzles me is years ago when Facebook was less than its greater size, they used to have a feature called sound bytes, you could upload an mp3 on Facebook, but then they took it off, they also took away good stuff like when they used to have an active chatroom app, bit strips and a few other kool apps they decided to fuck right off! And after all if you are just posting an mp3 of a song you like on your wall, and you don’t plan to make profit from it, then wtf is all this copyright bullshit anyway? 7-safety I personally don’t feel that Facebook is completely safe for anybody to be honest. It doesn’t have appropriate safeguards. Trolls will attack you sometimes on group pages just for having an opinion, and admins to not always take much notice, and if you get an admin that is in agreement with the trolls you are screwed! In the past Facebook has been a haven for Islamic groups to radicalise others on here to join terrorist networks and still is today! Facebook has been subject to crime related posts before now! 8-video calling Now this feature always bothered me. Ok you can go live on your timeline where your friends can see, but did you know other people can see you even if you don’t have your settings on public? This is because of privacy leakage and cyber criminals know your every move! Video in inbox is even worse, It’s a haven for perverts to put on a show and again is monitored by cyber criminals! This is why Skype and zoom are probably your best bet when video calling, sometimes WhatsApp and TikTok are not completely safe! 9 Lack of features I noticed that Facebook is kind of drying up when it comes to games and apps,also at the time it had an active chatroom, only thing is it was driven by flash player which generally now is obsolete! 10-ads All wel and good I suppose if you want to advertise a business to hundreds of people on Facebook yet it very seldom regards this as spam, or you will get the odd troll complaining that it is, yet if you try to post your service in multiple groups, Facebook will attribute this to spam and restrict you. This is because Facebook monetises itself with ads from all kinds of sources in and out of itself! So you dare not try to promote outside their promote ads feature-FAIL! So do you still love Facebook now? But consider this! Before you go slating something by someone, ignoring it or scrolling past it because your ego is to high and you think you are too good to sit up and take notice, I want you to bear something in mind! Now regardless of my 10 thoughts on the negative side of Facebook I can’t tell others not to go on it or twist their fucking arms up there backs to go elsewhere, But theres always this thing where you give something a

chance or a trial, and you never know you might actually like it, but if you don’t then at least you took it into account! There’s a lot of ignorance out there from people that slam something or dismiss it just because it’s something not well known, but if I recall right Mark Zuckerberg had not bargained on Facebook becoming the social giant it is now, he essentially developed it just as a network to go on the pull or for hookups! But look at it now, we all have to start somewhere right? So here goes! Imagine a new social network that does not control you. Would never tell you your limits unless you did something inappropriate. Would never allow porn anywhere. A network that has superior features such as apps, games,upload ability for audio and video, with new content added everyday? A network that you control. So I hereby present to you. BUDDYSCAPE What is Buddyscape? Buddyscape is an all new social network from the UK It was founded as a hobby just to see if I had what it took to build a social network, And make it run! It’s really only just starting out,so it’s not really well populated yet but who knows? Time will tell,always does! Rome was not built in a day but all roads lead to it! Features:- 1-No ads, porn or bots! 2-100% Non profit, all services are free! 3- No annoying ads! 4-Buddyscape is monitored by real people-yes real human beings! Non of this stupid bloody code stuff, but although we cannot monitor your private chats, We do expect you to tell us if something is wrong! 5-No Facebook jail here-just 3 warnings and an instant ban thereafter! 6-better safety This goes for adults and minors, if anybody feels somebody is making them uncomfortable or unsafe then one word from you will result in an instant ban,And thanks to no un-send feature you have ample time to screenshot evidence and send it to us for examination from the appropriate authorities! 7- Privacy is paramount We do not use your personal data We do not sell it or pass it on! We don’t even use bloody cookies! 8-No video calling This is more of a safety feature than anything else, And should be regarded as a better experience for both adults and children, and as we do not monitor private chats we can’t tell what is going on, although the lack of video calling features on Buddyscape may deter some from wanting to join, It will also deter those who have sexual intentions toward adults and children. And with other video calling apps like zoom or Skype it’s not really important for it to be there! 9-Friendly to all devices and easy to navigate! There isn’t an app of this on AppStore or play store right now, but one is in process of development! That being said, Buddyscape is fully mobile and tablet friendly with all features running as they should! 10-content Buddyscape has Apps, Games and a chatroom with content updating almost every day! You may upload any music or media you like as long as it is relatively clean! Also includes Spotify integration! See Terms and conditions when signing up. Any questions? Give me a shout! Stu! www.buddyscape.net Stuart Henderson-Founder/CEO.

[awkwardlyamusing-blog]

Addresses to the Painters convention, battle for Culinary show #LaborMatters

New Post has been published on http://doggietrainingclasses.com/addresses-to-the-painters-convention-battle-for-culinary-show-labormatters/

Addresses to the Painters convention, battle for Culinary show #LaborMatters

Your Nevada 2020 election newsletter. Please read, forward and subscribe.

Good morning, and welcome to the second installment of Indy 2020, a biweekly newsletter focused on the 2020 presidential election in Nevada. (If you missed the first one, you can read it here.) Tell your friends. Tell shoppers at the grocery store. Tell people at the dog park and… wherever it is you cat people hang out. (Cat cafes?) Subscribe here. It’ll be peachy.

It has been a slow(er) couple of weeks here in the Silver State — only one candidate visited, though several more did so virtually — which is good because I traded Paradise, Nevada for a different kind of paradise. I disappointingly did not run into Hawaii Rep. Tulsi Gabbard, who is on active duty in Indonesia for the next two weeks, but have returned refreshed and relaxed. There are 186 days until Nevada’s Feb. 22, 2020 Democratic caucuses. Seize the day, gather ye rosebuds while ye may.

Please reach out to me with any tips, story ideas, comments, suggestions, or your favorite TikToks at megan@thenvindy.com.

Without further ado, a download of the recent 2020 happenings in Nevada.

ON THE INDY

School may have started but not at Spanish Camp Kamala: The program, announced last week by California Sen. Kamala Harris’s campaign, is an expansion of an English-language program Team Kamala says has trained 16,000 volunteers. Participants of the Spanish iteration will learn the same things as their English counterparts, including how to organize in their community and lead their precincts come Caucus Day. 

On the importance of the Latino vote to winning Nevada, Harris campaign manager Emmy Ruiz told my colleague Luz Gray in an interview that “no podemos ganar sin ellos” — “we can’t win without them” — which isn’t so much a telegraph of campaign strategy as it is of an immutable mathematical reality in the Silver State, where 29 percent of the population is Latino.

Paint the town blue: Minnesota Sen. Amy Klobuchar was the only 2020 presidential hopeful to attend the annual International Union of Painters and Allied Trades convention at Caesars Palace in person. She spent much of her speech promoting infrastructure expansion, the Las Vegas Review Journal’s Rory Appleton reported. (Appleton said Klobuchar told him in an interview that she is “being cautious with her $7 million war chest” by way of explaining her lack of Nevada staffers, but that she “plans to announce statewide hires soon.”)

Other virtual attendees of the convention: Vermont Sen. Bernie Sanders, Massachusetts Sen. Elizabeth Warren, South Bend Mayor Pete Buttigieg and New Jersey Sen. Cory Booker. Georgia Democrat Stacey Abrams also attended the convention, where she unveiled her new anti-voter suppression initiative, Fair Fight 2020. My colleague Jackie Valley has more.

Culinary Twitter love: Sanders ignited a wave of Democratic presidential candidates taking to Twitter to call on the Palms Casino to negotiate with union workers. The unionization effort represents the latest battle for the politically powerful Culinary Union, which has been engaged in a yearslong effort to unionize Station Casinos properties in Nevada. 

The day after the Sanders tweet, Buttigieg piled on with his support on Twitter and, in the days after that, Harris and Massachusetts Rep. Seth Moulton did too. (Former Housing and Urban Development Secretary Julian Castro also tweeted his support more generally for Culinary’s parent union, UNITE HERE, though he tweeted a video in support for Culinary workers in July.)

Warren in a video told workers to “keep the pressure on” and that she stands “shoulder to shoulder” with them. (She first tweeted her support for the workers in March.) Others who have previously tweeted support for the union: Booker, Klobuchar, and former Texas Rep. Beto O’Rourke.

The surrogates come out: California Rep. Ted Lieu and California Secretary of State Alex Padilla were here on Aug. 8 and 9, respectively, for Harris. Lieu hosted a veterans roundtable and APIA community luncheon, while Padilla hosted a house party in East Las Vegas and met with CHISPA activists.

The offices, they have opened: Team Warren opened five field offices two weekends ago in Summerlin, Henderson, North Las Vegas, East Last Vegas and Reno. Notable attendees: Assemblywoman Shea Backus in Summerlin; Assemblywoman Heidi Swank in East Las Vegas; former state Sen. Sheila Leslie and Controller Catherine Byrne in Reno; former state Sen. Joe Neal in North Las Vegas; and Clark County School District Trustee Linda Cavazos in Henderson. That brings the campaign’s total number of offices in Nevada up to six, including the team’s Las Vegas headquarters. 

Sanders opened two offices — in Southwest Las Vegas and Reno — the same weekend, bringing his office total to six. Booker’s team also formally opened its first office in Las Vegas on Wednesday. (His campaign manager, Addisu Demissie, was there, as was his mom, who lives in Las Vegas.) Vice President Joe Biden’s campaign tells me they have additional field offices opening soon in the North and the South and a main Northern Nevada office in Reno.

Downward dog for Warren: Team Warren is hosting a series of nontraditional campaign events including political happy hours, a “Knock Down the House” movie night, a girls night wine-down mixer and phone bank, a book club, a yoga session, picnics to “plant plants and discuss plans” and taco-making sessions.

Team Trump news: The Trump Victory Committee and the Nevada Republican Party are hosting an economic roundtable at Ping Pang Pong in Las Vegas on Tuesday as part of a nationwide “Open for Business Tour.” Former Attorney General Adam Laxalt will be there, as will Nevada GOP Chairman Michael McDonald. A long list of current and former Team Trump folks — including acting chief of staff Mick Mulvaney — will also speak at Laxalt’s annual Basque Fry in Gardnerville in September.

CAMPAIGN NUGGETS

Staffing changes

Castro has brought on Benjamin Challinor as his Nevada organizing director. Challinor was most recently chief of staff for Senate Majority Leader Nicole Cannizzaro, managed state Sen. Julia Ratti’s campaign and worked for Hillary for America in Reno in 2016.

Biden’s campaign has hired Kayla Johnson as its Nevada digital director and Palak Iyer as its Nevada training director. Team Biden has also brought on a regional campus organizing director.

Team Buttigieg tells me the South Bend mayor now has 25 staff members on the ground and counting, including 18 organizers, four senior staffers, and five mid-level managers. 

Early endorsements

It’s been rather quiet in endorsement land. (Booker was endorsed on Monday by Patricia Gallimore, former president of the Reno-Sparks NAACP.) But remember: It’s still early.

Upcoming visits

Booker, Klobuchar, Harris, Castro and New York Mayor Bill de Blasio will speak at the AFL-CIO convention next week on Aug. 28 and 29 at the Flamingo. (Castro will also be here on Aug. 26 and 27 for other, unspecified events.) I’m told the Nevada AFL-CIO is working with a few more candidates interested in speaking and that the lineup should be finalized soon.

Biden is slated to return to Nevada on Sept. 27.

Giffords and March for Our Lives have now gotten 14 candidates confirmed to speak at their gun safety forum on Oct. 2, one day after the two-year anniversary of the Route 91 Harvest Festival shooting in Las Vegas. Those attending include Biden, Sanders, Booker, Buttigieg, Harris, Klobuchar, O’Rourke, Warren, entrepreneur Andrew Yang, Castro, New York Sen. Kirsten Gillibrand, Washington Gov. Jay Inslee, billionaire Tom Steyer, and self-help author Marianne Williamson.

For all the details, keep your eye on our 2020 Candidate Tracker.

DOWN BALLOT NEWS

Blue, blue everywhere, but there was none to drink: Democrat Clint Koble is taking another stab at Republican Rep. Mark Amodei’s Northern Nevada seat. Koble lost by more than 16 percentage points to Amodei in 2018 in spite of the blue wave. Indytern Taylor Avery has more.

OTHER REQUIRED READING

How Nevada’s virtual caucus is supposed to work (Las Vegas Sun)

Democratic presidential hopefuls on the housing crisis (RGJ)

#WeDon’tMatterPartOne (FiveThirtyEight)

#WeDon’tMatterPartTwo (FiveThirtyEight)

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