#and you can't even say this is a host's job anymore either

[elainemorisi]

perhaps, for my thirties, it is time to harness my powers of not giving a solitary shit what people think of me and Learn Conversation by brute force and repetition, because hoo boy, my generation, the skill, she is lost

[5five5five5five5five5five]

Bored take some Viktor five content:

* five and Viktor end up being roommates due to everyone else not having the strong tolerance to handle his ass. Viktor doesn't either but they wanted to go back to the start and rebuild a dynamic after all the chaos and drama.

* they end up getting really close. It's easier for Viktor to listen to five talk about his past now that they have experienced all sorts of weird shit and five is less bitter about viktor's new found independence and choices now that the world is saved.

* I hc that five has trouble using Viktor's preferred name and five HATES IT. It's not to be disrespectful or not understanding gender, he's all cool and very respectful. It's that when you have truama as deep rooted as his, calling out his siblings names on a daily basis in a lonely ruined world for 40 years. Carrying around viktor's book as a lifeline to stay close to him....it's just not something your brain can let go. he wants to let it go, he feels like a ass everytime he slips and apologizes like 3 times even when Viktor said it's ok. his truama CLINGs to viktor's dead name like his life depends on it. He does get better at it as they start live together and it was a 1/9 chance anyway so Viktor wasn't too bugged by it and understood that it's not meant to be disrespectful. Trauma's a bitch. They both get that.

* they take turns making lunch and dinners. Breakfast is always coffee and peanut butter and marshmallow sandwiches.

* Five starts collecting vintage cook books because he's had food from other timelines that aren't as popular anymore and wishes to make them.

* Viktor LOVES Chappell Roan. Five is unimpressed but likes watching Viktor just jam out well doing chores or studying.

*Viktor would drag five to a lot of queer centric events and five would feel out of place at first like "I'm your 60 year old straight cisgendered brother that looks 15. I don't fit in and I don't think that drag show bouncer is going to be as lenient as that strip club in the 60's...long story." But over time, five actually starts to enjoy himself. And maybe learning his gender and sexuality along the way (I don't have strong opinions on that yet. All ik is he's such a fruit and has no idea /pos. When Viktor and Klaus are your favorite siblings....ask yourself whyyy)

* they host small dinners with a handful of siblings at a time. They can't host all of them at once due to their apartment size (it would be a disaster) but sometimes Diego, Lila and the kids come over. Or just Luther with fast food well he was walking home. I think the biggest group would be brother nights (sorry Allison....i feel so bad for her lmao I think her and Lila hang out on those nights. )

* five and Viktor realized that giving the other puppy eyes breaks the other easily. I think both have trouble saying no to the other due to feeling bad about how much they fought and were butting heads throughout Dallas and the hotel. Five doesn't want to let his bs behavior under "gotta save the world" distress linger between them. And Viktor doesn't either, he also misses his brother and just wants to see him happy and relaxed for once.

*that doesn't mean they don't fight. They bicker consistently about such basic things . From where the remote is to when the other will be home to the past. They don't don't do a good job at not throwing the past in each others face......but they useally settle down.

*Viktor LOVES to try and use therapy talk with five, who hates it at first. But overtime, I think after a very strong breakthrough in his issues and realizing how much not being under survival adrenaline is effecting him, he becomes more accepting of it. And it's helped their fighting and understanding each other a lot.

* I feel like they get rather touchy together over time. Fixing each others hair, leaning on the other well sitting on the sofa, etc

*five has to tie viktor's ties ALL THE TIME.

*(tw drugs) I feel like they have "rekindling our Lost teen years together" nights where they get high (they only take edibles bc neither like smoking) and watch all the cartoons five has missed. Wear comfy clothes. Talk about nothing. They try to make it a point to talk about anything BUT family and the past. Witch helps them grow closer.

*five wants bees. They have no room. Five is very sad. Viktor hopes they one day get a bigger place to have bees.

* five gets a emotional support animal with viktor's help. mr.pennycrumb! They do all the training and five loves that boy with his life. He really helps him with episodes and panics.

* Viktor ends up helping five with rather basic things. Again, no more survival adrenaline to make him speed learn everything all the time. He can afford to be confused and frustrated. "Egh How does the tv remote work again?" "The pepper grinder has stopped wo- oh the other direction..." Five starts to feel rather useless but Viktor likes helping. five bitterly jokes at Viktor being either his elderly care nurse or babysitter. Viktor reassures him it's not like that and they are just brothers and he needs help.

* Viktor gets into the habit of calling five "bud" as a loving brother pet name.

I've ran out of brain fuel. I could go on for hours about them though.

(PRO SHIPS DNI THIS IS ALL PLATONIC)

[i-cant-sing]

Okay but imagine platonic yandere surgeon dabi who’s your dad and you try to pretend to be sick to get out of doing something or so that you don’t have to go to school and lawyer hawks is like oh no my poor baby is sick but surgeon dabi sees right through your act 😭

YESSSSS OMG FINALLY A GOOD ASK FOR THEM💖💖💖💖

Okay so let's set the scene:

Keigo and Dabi have plans for dinner and wanna take you out with them, and you don't want to go because you wanna sneak out and go to a party or something, but since that's not going to fly with them, you decide to fake being sick.

"Y/n? Sweetie are you ready- oh hun! What's wrong?" Keigo asked when he walked into your room, immediately concerned when he found you under the covers.

Alright, time for an Oscar worthy performance.

You slowly peaked your head out from the sheets, groaning at "sharp" lights. Barely opening your eyes, you sniffled.

"I'm sick."

Keigo's eyes widened and in a second, the first had become a coddling mother who just needed to shield you, her sick little Victorian child on the verge of death, from the bad air.

He climbed onto the bed next to you, pulling you against him and felt your warm forehead (classic "hair dryer" trick), cooing when you whined at his "too cold" hand.

"Aww my poor baby! Don't worry, I'm right here!" Keigo cooed, wiping the "sweat" of your forehead (which was just some water spray). "I'm gonna have your dad come in. DABI!"

Dabi walked in his suit, hair combed back and nothing to cover the bags under his eyes. "What?"

"What do you mean "what"? OUR BABY- oh sorry princess, too loud, hm? Dabi, our baby is sick!"

Dabi raised a brow at you, and you instinctively coughed, making him narrow his eyes at you.

"Why don't you check her while I bring her something to eat and find some painkillers?" Keigo said before running out of the room.

"So... what's wrong with you?" Dabi asked as he walked upto you. You glared at him before coughing. "Isn't that your job to figure out?"

"Clearly not sick enough for sarcasm. Come on, let's go."

"No, no-" you coughed again. "-I don't feel well. I'm feverish and my head hurts."

Dabi hummed as he placed a hand on your forehead. "Its not too warm. I can get a thermometer. Really, you just need a painkiller and you'll be fine-"

"No! No- I mean, it'll only get worse! I just need to stay in bed and sleep. And why do you need a thermometer? Aren't you experienced enough to know it by touch now? Can't you see how red my cheeks are? Are you even a real doctor-?" You stopped when Dabi swiped a finger across your red cheek.

"Makeup? Really?" He asked, eyes unamused as he looked at the reddish pigment on his finger. "And its got glitter in it too. You're an idiot."

"Am not! That's sweat!" You pouted but immediately whined when Dabi pinched your nose.

"Stop lying. Now get up and get ready. I'm not getting late because of you." He began getting up but then you held onto his arm and gave him your best puppy eyes.

"Okay, you got me! But please, I don't want to go to another dinner party! They're so boring! Why can't you guys just go to one without me, and I can just chill at home!"

Dabi narrowed his eyes at you. "Its a dinner hosted by your school! I don't want to go either but Keigo said it'll be bad for you if we don't attend these functions."

"I know, I know! But please, I already had to go to his work party and then your cancer research thingy and I just don't have anymore social battery left!" You cried out, like a spoiled little toddler, or at least that's how Dabi saw it.

His lips pressed into a thin line as he thought for a moment before sighing. "Fine. You don't have to go. I'll talk to Keigo." You beamed and leaned up to hug him. Dabi patted your head before pushing you away and leaving the room to inform Keigo.

As you were rejoicing at your small victory, Keigo suddenly ran in, hugging you. "Aww poor baby! Your dad tells me you're too sick to leave the house. Bed rest, strictly he says!" He kissed the top of your head. "Well that's alright! We'll cancel our plans too and stay at home with you!"

What?

"Eh? No, no! You guys go! I mean, don't spoil your night because of me-!" But he cut you off by pulling your face to his chest and shook his head.

"Nonsense! How can we leave you here all alone? Your dad's calling them to inform them we can't come. But don't you worry! Me and your dad will spend the night here in your room!"

You shook your head. "That's nice, but I don't want you to get sick too-"

"Oh don't worry about that! Dabi says whatever you have is not contagious at all! In fact, he was the one who suggested that we have a movie night and make a cuddle pile! You'll be healed by my hugs and kisses, princess!" Keigo said cheerfully before going on about what movies and snacks he was gonna get.

Meanwhile, you saw Dabi standing at the doorway with a huge smirk on his face, confirming he did this on purpose. Did he know you were going to sneak out?

Social battery, my ass. Did she really think I was born yesterday?

[reclaimedbythesea]

Being Married To Frank (Abigail) Headcanons

Congratulations, you've fallen for clickbait that's not clickbait. You will have HCs, just not the good ones! (For human Frank of course)

~~~

Frank is fashionably late to his own wedding. Not that he cares, he runs on Frank Standard Time. Criminal buddies are present, you have no idea who any of them are.

He doesn't actually care much for his vows, bro actually cheated a day after the wedding but never told you.

He's always home super late and still expects dinner to be made. If not he complains about doing everything to support you, yet you can't make sure a hot meal is there when he gets home.

The type to ask you to drop anything you're doing at any given moment to make him a sandwich.

Forgets the anniversary date of your wedding. Don't even ask him about vow renewals, he thinks they're overrated.

In the event the two of you procreate, he's going to complain about having another mouth to feed on top of providing for yourself.

He misses his own child's birth, going on a job with his criminal buddies during the entire thing. Frank shows up around the hour before you and the child are discharged from the hospital. He doesn't even ask how you're doing.

Frank is keeping his distance away from the small child, "politely" refusing to hold them when you ask if he wants to. He wants to say it's "the woman's job" to take care of kids, he just works to provide the means to do so.

Gone again for "work", leaving you home alone with a baby and chores to do.

If the child wakes up in the middle of the night Frank's tapping on your shoulder to wake you up to deal with it because he can't be bothered.

Unsurprisingly, he misses his kid's first birthday. And that's not the last time. Maybe he makes it to one but you noticed a woman keeping her distance from the party. She's blonde with blue eyes and so very pretty. Frank insists she's just a friend.

You don't see her again for weeks. However he's talking to someone over the phone before entering the house one afternoon. Won't give her a name but she shows up to one cookout he hosts.

A new girl; brunette, fairly tall with heels. Frank's bad at hiding it but he's pretty much all over her. You just have to grin and bear it.

For some reason you don't see her again after some weeks. Frank is still distant as if he's hiding something. However the money is still flowing and he's his usual self still, asking for sandwiches and dinner.

Divorce floats around in your head, but you can't do it. Part of you still loves him. Although there's barely any intimacy with him anymore. If there is, he usually goes to sleep right after.

However one day you're out shopping and arrive home with your child. The house feels... different, more empty than usual. Frank's not there--as if that ever bothered you. But there's an envelope on the table with your name on it.

It's money, a good amount to keep you set for one month longer. Frank had moved all his stuff out. The bastard.

Looks like you were moving back in with your parents.

Calling his number only leads to "the person you are trying to reach no longer exists" (he's got a new phone already).

No point in keeping the ring (he's already pawned his ring for money -- and you should too).

He doesn't do child support either. Tough luck.

Maybe your friends were right about him. Too late now. :^)

[skzhocomments]

THE WHITE LILY (Mafia Book #1 - Bang Chan) - Chapter 1 - Girl on a mission

Story masterlist - please consult it for the summary of the story, trigger warnings etc.

General masterlist

Chapter 1 (current chapter) - Wattpad | AO3

Chapter 2

---

Chapter 1 - Girl on a mission

chapter word count: 4.1k words

~1 year and 6 months before Present Day~

"Find and kill CB97."

"That's impossible."

"It's not, if you wanna get out of here."

"Fuck you."

"Shut your fucking mouth. Don't forget who you're fucking speaking to, bitch!" Boss said, while pointing his loaded gun at me. "I'm giving you two options here. You either kill him, or you leave this place dead."

"I don't even know what he looks like or what his real name is!" I whined.

"Look, that's not my fucking problem. I think I'm giving you a pretty good offer here. Most don't get to leave this place alive at all. So, you either do what I'm asking, or you don't and suffer the consequences. You know the rules!" He screamed harshly.

I knew he was right. Leaving a mafia wasn't as simple as submitting a resignation letter when you got tired of your job.

You couldn't simply leave a mafia.

Someone who's outside is a risk to the others' safety. Anyone who's out becomes a target, a way for our rivals to get data on us.

However, my gang - The Scarlet Rose - is a bit different. Here, the rules state that, if you do wish to leave, you have the leisure to do so, providing you complete the mission Boss gives you.

More often than not, though, the mission proves itself to be simply impossible. Some give up on leaving altogether, others get killed while attempting to do so.

I believe no one's ever managed to complete it. There are only rumours that some people have, but there's no actual proof. And as they say – only believe what's in front of your eyes.

So, why would I want to go through this just to leave, you might ask?

It's pretty simple: this gang's rules no longer coincide with my life views. In fact, they never have, but even more so lately. My boss makes me take innocent lives. I am forced to kill families, children... I don't want to do this anymore.

I don't mind killing bastards as long as they deserve it, but I'm drawing the line at infants who can't even speak, let alone be guilty of anything.

~

Three weeks after the pretty chat with my boss, I've heard through the grapevine that SKZ Mafia will be hosting a party at their house and made some plans on how to get in.

I've faked my identity, posing as a millionaire's wife, and entered the premises quite easily. Red lips, wearing a classy but slutty long black dress, under which I've hidden a dagger, strapped to the back of my thigh, and I was ready to make my way through.

The plan for tonight was to use my good looks to find out who exactly CB97 was, at least. If I'm lucky, I could also attempt seducing him and taking him to bed to kill him when he's most vulnerable. This shouldn't be too hard, right? He's just a man... Like all Mafia leaders, this CB97 is probably an old degenerate, sex maniac psychopath.

Unless the 97 comes from his birth year or something.

Nah, that can't be it. I chuckled to the dumb possibility that this guy would be my age.

Anyway, the success rate for this plan is dim, though, maybe 30% on a lucky day, since this guy's been so secretive about himself all this time.

However, I felt pretty lucky today.

May the odds be in my favour, as they always are.

~

I was two hours in, when suddenly I got approached by someone.

"Bored?" the mysterious man said, placing his hand gently on my lower back.

I smirked cunningly seeing the man in front of me and thought that maybe I could get some information from him if I flirted a bit. He was also hot as fuck, and a little fun never hurt anyone, did it?

"Not at all. Just enjoying the wine and taking in the atmosphere. This place looks amazing. Just to my taste." I looked him from head to toe and gave him a suggestive look.

"Thank you."

"What for?" I raised an eyebrow curiously.

"For the compliments on my mansion, of course."

"CB97, then? I didn't expect you to be so young." I replied, genuinely surprised by this.

Shit, so 97 was his birth year after all!

Should I continue with the plan, or should I just get out of here quietly? I found out what he looks like, after all...

"You didn't expect me to me so hot." He whispered in my ear, which made my cheeks turn red. Thanks god for make-up. "I noticed you've been fucking me with your eyes from the moment you saw me."

Nah, he fell right into my trap. This might still work.

"Are you always so cheeky?" I turned to face him and put one arm over his shoulder, grabbing at his shirt and pulling his body closer.

"Are you always so bold?" he returned my question and brought his face closer to mine, our lips almost touching.

"Mhm. I am. So how about we take this upstairs?" CB97 chuckled hearing my proposal.

"Wouldn't your millionaire husband have something to say about that?"

"Like I give a shit about what he thinks." I scoffed. "Look at you." I flirted and bit my bottom lip playfully, eyeing him from under my long eyelashes.

CB97 showed me his teeth through a sly smile and grabbed my hand in his, guiding me up the stairs.

"Let's get going, then. The night's still young."

~

He led me to an exquisite room that had a master bed with fresh linen on top.

Without missing a beat, CB97 pushed me on the bed and kissed me hard. I don't know if the wine was getting to my head, but his plum lips tasted so sweet, almost addictive; I was mesmerised by how good he felt on top of me.

CB97 licked my upper lip, as if asking for permission, so I bravely stuck out my tongue a bit, touching his.

He was quick to respond, sucking on my tongue and continuing to kiss me deeper and deeper.

Don't forget why you're here, Emilia.

I put my arms around his neck and pulled him in closer, if that was even possible. His kisses were making me drunk, his tongue exploring every corner of my mouth.

All of a sudden, he pulled back and looked me in the eyes.

"Just wanted to let you know that I like it a little rough." He said with a stern face, taking my hands in his and putting them above my head, locking them in place with one hand, while he took off his belt with the other.

He was so strong, I couldn't move from his grip.

I didn't have any time to protest as he skilfully tied the belt tightly around my wrists. He then stood up on the bed and grabbed my body, turning me around, so that my face was buried in the sheets.

This is dangerous.

"I'd prefer if I had more control." I chuckled, hoping the man would release me, and turned my head to the right to look at him, resting my left cheek on the bed.

His eyes were dark, but his face showed a blank expression. He looked at me coldly, as he pressed his whole weight on top of me, his crotch pressing firmly on my ass, and moved my hair to free my neck. There was a powerful contrast between his action and his words. He kissed my neck gently, but what he whispered in my ear made my skin crawl.

"Why, so you could kill me, Emilia?"

My heart rose up my throat. How does he know my real name?

I swallowed my saliva and tried to calm down. My chest started hurting, as my heart beat faster and faster.

Fear.

That's how I felt.

I was scared.

CB97 traced his hand on the length of my leg and felt the dagger on my thigh.

"Is this what you wanted to use to kill me?" he asked mockingly, taking the dagger out, admiring it, and pressing its' blade firmly on my neck, not strong enough to pierce my skin, but enough to feel its coldness. "I like your style."

"Nice dagger, huh?" I tried hiding how I was really feeling behind this stupid joke.

Who betrayed me?

"Indeed. But damn, you really are bold, coming into my house like you own the place and planning to kill me in my own bed."

Fuck.

I am genuinely scared.

I will die.

What should I do?

"So, why kill me, babygirl?"

I scoffed at his choice of nickname and smirked.

"What, didn't your informant give you all the details?" I mocked.

"Oh, baby, he did. Just wanted to check if the stories matched."

When I stayed silent, he continued.

"Cause if they do, I feel sorry for you. You've been sent to the wolf's lair, only for the wolf to be informed that you're coming for his neck."

"... Who told you?"

Chan smirked. "Your boss."

"WHAT?!" I asked surprised, trying to turn around, but CB97 kept me in place with his body.

"Sit tight, will you?"

I sighed.

"It must hurt horribly to be sold out like that by your family." Chan whispered in my ear.

"What family? Those bastards aren't my family."

Even if I didn't consider them so, as they say you should once you join a mafia, CB97 was right. Betrayal did hurt like hell.

Feeling some stubborn tears forming in the corners of my eyes, I turned my head, so that my face would be buried in the sheets.

It wasn't the first time I've been close to dying.

No, far from that, actually.

But it was the first time I've been so... helpless.

It was the first time no one was coming to help.

Boss wanted to get rid of me, so he sent me here to die.

All hope is lost.

I will die.

I started shaking under CB97 as I tried to control the tears.

Fuck, this is not the time to be emotional, Emilia.

I cleared my throat and tried to think of something else, to divert my attention from the feelings of betrayal and from fear, as my last moments were approaching.

"Hey, since I'm going to die soon anyway, what's your real name?"

"Curious?" CB97 replied. Although I couldn't see his face, I was sure the fucker smirked.

"Mhm." I nodded.

"They say curiosity killed the cat, you know?"

"But satisfaction brought it back." I smirked.

"Hah. Fair point, love."

"You know mine, might as well let me know yours as well. I'll quite literally take it to my grave, so it doesn't matter to you either way. It won't hurt you." I replied defeated.

CB97 got off me and turned me around again, so that my back was firmly pressed against the mattress. He got on top of me and caressed my face with his thumbs, forcing me to look him in the eyes.

I hated this.

He will see my tears. He will see how weak I am.

"Say please?"

"Pff. As if I would." I rolled my eyes so far back, I almost saw my brain for a second.

"No longer curious?"

"Just wanted to put a name to your pretty face before you kill me, that's all."

Repeating it out loud, the realisation that I was going to die hit me again.

I tried to swallow back the tears, but I couldn't stop them. They started flowing, rolling off my face uncontrollably.

"Shhh, don't cry, baby." CB97 said soothingly, as he continued to brush his hands on my face and wipe off the tears that wouldn't stop falling.

He was giving me fake comfort, I knew, but I allowed myself to get relaxed under his touch and pretend that everything would be alright.

"Do you hate me?" he asked, searching my face for the truth.

"No."

"Even though I'm about to kill you?"

I tensed at his words.

"I don't hate you." I answered truthfully. "I hate the situation I put myself in, that got me in your bed tonight. But I don't hate you, CB97."

"Bang Chan."

"Huh?"

"Bang Chan. That's my name."

"Bang Chan... okay." I nodded softly. "Turns out my key to freedom will be my demise." I smiled sadly and looked into his eyes. "Your name has a nice ring to it. It suits you."

"Yours too."

"Please do me a favour and finish me off quickly, hm?" I continued and closed my eyes, waiting for Bang Chan to take my life.

Instead, I was met with a soft peck on my lips.

"I can still be your key to freedom." He said, trailing soft kissing down my neck, sucking small bruises on it, making me whimper.

I clenched my thighs under his touch, feeling intoxicated by him. I wasn't supposed to feel like this. I was on my death bed, but I was dripping wet just from his whispers and touches.

"What, if I let you fuck me, you'll let me go?" I laughed sarcastically.

"Let me fuck you? Babygirl, I don't need you to let me do anything. I know you want it as much as me." As he said this, he traced two of his fingers on my slit, through my panties, feeling my horniness. I was mad at my body for betraying me like this, but he was right the second time this night. I was lusting over his body.

He didn't remove my panties, but he pressed two fingers firmly on my clit, applying pressure, before rubbing it a little, causing me to moan.

"See what I mean? I'm not blind, Emilia." he whispered more in my ear, licking my earlobe, sending me into overdrive.

"However, if you don't want it, I won't touch you any further." He got off of me and freed my arms, pulling me in a seated position and handing me my dagger. "That's also not what I meant. I'm not looking for a fuckdoll. But I can still be your key to freedom if you choose to follow me."

I took the dagger from his hand unsurely and thought for a bit.

Follow him? Does he think I'm stupid?

I can't kill him. He is way more powerful than me.

And even if I managed to strike him down, the other members probably know we were inside and watching us closely.

Even if I somehow escaped this mansion, Boss wanted me dead. It wouldn't matter if I'd free myself from him.

I'm dead, either way.

And the only way to make sure I die on my terms is...

I closed my eyes, took a deep breath, and quickly pointed the dagger to my throat, sending my arm as powerfully as I could towards my carotid artery.

Penetrating this artery would most likely result in a quick death. I would bleed out quickly, it would only hurt for a few minutes.

~

"What the fuck?!" I heard Bang Chan's voice loud and clear, and although I braced myself for the blade's fury, I could only feel my hand being held back forcefully.

I opened my eyes, shaking.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck." was the only thing I could blurt out, as Chan took the dagger out of my hand.

"What the actual fuck, Emilia. That was a test to see if I can trust you not to kill me, but I wasn't expecting you to try and commit suicide. For fuck's sake." He spit out.

"I'm... sorry?" I said, unsure of what just happened and why he's stopped me. Quite annoyed, I ranted "Why did you stop me? Just kill me already! I'm ready to die!" tears streaming down my face once again.

"I don't want to kill you. It'd be a waste of talent. So how about we make a deal? Follow me, join SKZ, and let's get revenge on that old bastard together. I've always hated his guts, you wanted to leave his mafia anyway. He'll think you died; we'll have enough time to plan his death."

"Wh-"

"So, what do you say?"

"I – I don't know. I mean, yes, but, how can you trust me? Aren't you taking a big risk here?"

"You should learn to keep your pretty mouth shut sometimes; it might make some overthink their decisions if you plant doubt like that." He caressed my cheek. "Not me, though, my intuition tells me to trust you."

"O-okay. But, I want to be free to choose things for myself. I don't want to be a bird in a cage if I choose to... join you."

"No one in SKZ is here forcefully. My only request is to kill that bastard, but other than that, you're free to do whatever you please. Once he's dead, you can start a new life somewhere else, for all I care, or you can continue to stay here. Whichever you want."

"Really?"

"Mhm."

"But why?"

"Your questions are getting annoying."

"Then... how should we seal the deal?" I asked, Chan picking up on my underlying question.

"So you do want my body tonight, huh?" he smirked, closing the distance between our lips and laying me on the bed again.

Our kisses were even more intense than before, both of us hungry for the other's touch.

"Fuck, you're hot." I mouthed in between the wet kisses we were sharing.

Chan moaned at that and stopped, looking me straight in the eyes.

"Fuck, you're beautiful. I want you so much, I could break you."

I felt myself blush at his sudden confession, before unconsciously tensing.

"Everything all right? We don't have to do this if you don't want to."

"I do want it, but..."

"But?" he raised a brow.

"Don't laugh."

Chan was now even more confused, but he nodded in agreement, so I took a deep breath and confessed, quietly.

"I, uhm... it's my first time."

"WHAT? How the fuck, when you look like that?" he asked, surprised.

"It's just... no one's made me feel horny before. But you, fuck, I want you." I cursed, looking at the bulge in his pants and feeling my legs clenching again. "Please take care of me."

"Such a needy girl." He praised and caressed my head gently, before kissing me again, his tongue deeper than before. "Baby, I might be a monster to most, but tonight, I'll be a gentleman to you, I promise."

He quickly took off his shirt, exposing his toned abs, and continued leaving wet trails on my neck.

Each time his lips grazed my skin, I could feel myself burning, and I moaned with pleasure under his every touch.

He made me stand up so he could take off my dress, leaving my body bare in front of him.

"Damn." He muttered under his breath, as he pulled me closer, his hands touching me everywhere.

His mouth was going lower and lower, and I whined in anticipation. I wanted his tongue connecting to my core, but instead, he decided to tease me, not touching me where I needed him most.

He kissed my thighs, sometimes his teeth grazing my soft skin and making me moan again and again.

"Please, touch me."

Chan chuckled. "Where?"

I groaned. I couldn't wait anymore, so I grabbed a chunk of his hair and pointed his head to my crotch.

"You're lucky this is your first time, otherwise I would've punished you like hell for this."

Even though his tone was harsh, Chan complied and gently licked my core.

The pleasure was too much, my knees growing weaker, and soon enough I fell on the bed.

"Can't handle it, baby? We just started."

He pushed me further on the bed and made sure we both sat comfortably, before he started eating me out again. His tongue drew circles on my clit, sending waves of pleasure.

Kissing his way up my lips again and initiating another passionate kiss, he quickly moved his mouth and focused on my neck again, pushing two fingers into my mouth.

"Suck." He commanded, and I listened and sucked on them to the best of my ability.

"Good girl." He praised, before his lips met mine again.

He took the two fingers to my slit and started rubbing me slowly. I couldn't even kiss him right because I moaned each time he moved.

"Never did this before, baby?"

I shook my head.

"Then you're gonna love this."

As he said that, he slowly inserted his index finger, his mouth moving to my right breast, sucking on my nipple gently.

He was moving the finger in and out, and when he noticed I've relaxed more, he asked:

"Think you can handle one more?"

As the words left his mouth, he put his middle finger inside as well, earning another small moan from me.

His hand movements were slow, but he was hitting all the right spots, making me pant for air and put my arms around his neck, pointing his mouth to my neck, place he gladly took as he began to kiss my neck gently.

Just as I was reaching my high, he pulled his fingers out.

"Wh-" I looked at him with doe eyes, not understanding why he stopped.

"You're so needy." Chan chuckled. "Soon, baby."

Chan unbuckled his belt, his bulge even more obvious through his underwear, which he was quick to cast aside.

I couldn't take my eyes off him. He looked so hot, his body toned and his member... quite impressive.

"Like what you see?"

I licked my lips and stood up a bit, pulling him above me and kissing him. His tip was now aligned with my entrance, and he groaned as he slowly started to push in.

It was painful enough to make me dug my nails in his back. Small tears formed in the corner of my eyes.

"Are you okay?" Chan asked. "Does it hurt a lot?"

"Mhm. It does."

"Want me to stop?"

"No, baby, keep going." I replied, hearing him groan at the nickname.

He caressed my face with his thumbs as he continued to push in me, in an attempt to comfort me.

I whimpered as he worked his whole length inside.

"Shh, I know, baby." He comforted me again. "Just relax, it will feel better soon, I promise."

He picked up the pace, stretching my walls, and I could feel the pain being replaced with something different. A new kind of pleasure.

"You fit me so well, baby. You're so good." Chan praised me, moans escaping his lips.

Instead of hovering over me, he changed positions and stood on his knees, taking my legs and placing them on his shoulders, supporting my body weight as my bum was no longer touching the sheets.

Like this, he was reaching even deeper than before, touching a very sweet spot inside of me.

"Fuck, you're doing amazing. Right there, baby. Please keep it up." I praised him as well, watching as his face contorted with pleasure.

Just a few more thrusts made me reach a powerful climax and grab the sheets under me powerfully, moaning Chan's name over and over.

His movements were quick to become sloppy, and without warning, he pushed one last time inside before releasing himself in me.

His eyes became big, as he started to frantically apologise.

"Shit. Fuck. I wasn't supposed to... Fuck. I'm so sorry. I couldn't control it. Damn, this never happened before."

"That's okay... I'm on BC."

"On Bang Chan?" he joked and winked, making me slap his hand playfully. "Why are you on birth control though, if you aren't having any sex? Or weren't, I guess."

"Menstrual issues."

"I see." He nodded.

After losing my virginity, I suddenly felt the need to receive some after care and attention.

Fucking hormones, I thought, realising how dumb it was to expect Chan, essentially a cold-hearted mafia leader, to comfort me and make me feel loved.

And what a dumb word this was, love.

I looked down at my hands and an involuntary sigh left my lips.

As I tried to get up in an attempt to find my clothes and get the hell out of this room, my feet gave in, and I fell back down on the bed.

"Where are you going, hm?" Chan asked softly, his hand gripping my arm and pulling me next to him, his body engulfing me in a hug.

"I just thought-"

"Let's sleep for now and think tomorrow, okay?"

I allowed myself to relax in his arms and closed my eyes, falling asleep quickly.

---

Chapter 2

[solradguy]

Blade tried to get you to let him host your translation of GG Begin on his site? Not me getting flashbacks to that one time he tried to get credit for Nainsoo’s and Kitsoru’s old overture artbook short story translations. Good job dodging that bullet sir. Many have been fooled. Even Woolie, but luckily he found out eventually and even got Arksys to sponsor his guilty gear lore summaries!

He did, yeah. I think it was maybe Volcanic or a general warning post about him on here that made me aware of what he's done/is like beforehand? It was a while ago, like right after I posted the finished translation, so I can't remember exactly how it went anymore lol I do remember that his invitation to host the translation was actually really polite, which threw me off and that was the first time I went through his blog.

Blade usually keeps a low profile and until recently no one really dunked on him in a major way either. So if his messages to Woolie about collaborating on the lore videos and maybe to rehost Nainsoo/Kitsoru's GG2OMC translations were as polite as the message he sent me, I could see how they would be willing to work with him.

In a way I almost feel kind of bad for him because he doesn't really seem like a bad person deep down? He just has these crazy weird/awful interpretations of the lore and characters that he won't budge on despite piles of evidence against them. In any case, I wish people would just block him and leave him alone instead of sending him death threats. He's not going to change, he's been doing Guilty Gear stuff for at least a decade, and he's not going to go anywhere because he's getting bullied online.

I don't agree with like 99% of the things he says or has done, and I don't really care for him as a person either, but I think a lot of people lately are going too far. Most people in the fandom that care about the niche lore documents and discussion already know to avoid him and his works; he doesn't have hardly any influence at all over these things anymore. Just ignore him or make the occasional warning post if it's been a while, you know?

(for context he's being roasted alive over on twitter lately)

[smileymoth]

17, 15, 8 and 27 for janar

janar is this special little blond bastard who i hate /affectionate

17. how did they spend their summers/free time as a child? i think he was a much happier person in middle school than he was in high school, so he probably spent most summers with his friends, either outdoors or playing video games with them. It was always he who hosted because he was the only one who had video games from his friends. And like the newest gaming console too. I think his parents also took him on a lot of trips around the world then, before he turned like 15 and started slowly realizing that sth is off about their relationship and how everything seems to revolve around money absolutely always. How it's always about the money and never him, how his hobbies are never about him having fun but rather how lucrative it would be. How it made him a better person. Something about it rubbed him the wrong way i'd say. And he also started getting the hang of his parents not really... Caring about him anymore? Like his grades were good, therfor, why did it matter, he was fine, his parents paid just enough attention to him to get him independent.

So yeah he stopped going on trips with them because he didn't like the idea of spending so much time with his parents now. The thought of his friends probably coming over just cuz he's rich also flashed his mind so he started to shut in a bit more. be more wary of how his friends spoke to him and around him since he always had pocket money until like. 7th grade too, and then he had to get his own job, and he was used to always buying his friends ice cream and etc. you know. And now he couldn't because it was money he had to earn. His father is a rich business man btw.

So yeah he hung around his few friends he had in middle school :) and later he got jobs in the summer. Probably at a bar. He hated it. He hates people he finds them all fucking annoying.

He went to parties, started drinking and smoking at like age 13 probably as the average estonian does. His mother is a police officer so he was more wary about it but then he got caught once coming home drunk and his mom was FUMING so he decided okay I'll just keep doing it then. fuck you. you can't stop me. probably dealt weed with his friends at age 16 lmao. Just to spite his mother.

15. how big or small is their family? who did they live with growing up? do they live with anyone now?

He grew up with his mother, father, and older sister. That is the extent of their family. He obviously has grandparents and uncles but I think his family is fairly secluded from them? I think his grandparents, both sets of them, live in Tallinn, and they live in Pärnu, so they don't even see them that much. And they don't call much either. Well maybe they do but Janar has no fucking clue because his parents are literally never around. His father is either out on business trips or his mom is just late nights at work bc she likes her job and does overtime for no money. hashtag i hate cops. Bastard. sorry. Anyway. His sister moved out when he was 16, so that made him even more sad because his sister was the only one who he got along with in that household fairly well. They still talk over the phone but she's in uni and does Not come home for the same reasons listed above. Neither of them like their parents.

Right now he lives alone in a small apartment in Tartu I think. It's fairly close to his sisters place. He used to live with his sister while he searched for his own place :)

8. do they have a nickname? who gave it to them? if it's not derived from their real name, what's the story behind it?

He doesn't exactly have a nickname that he likes. He and Gabriel were pretty good friends in 10th grade, before Janar got pissed off by his parents being good parents and he just became annoyed by him. Also because he thought Gabriel was trying to hit on him and that he was gay (both correct), Gabriel gave him the nickname Jannu and he HATED it so much. Please stop. He keeps calling him that throughout high school to piss him off. They kinda become friends again tho. But not really.

Perhaps they would see each other in Tartu, since I think they moved there now... omg yes like he works at Mini Rimi. Maybe the one thats near the uni yk. omg so annoying the guy you didnt like in high school just shows up at your work fairly regularly. thats funny I like that.

27. if applicable, do they have a favorite sport? do they play any sports or prefer to watch?

I think he's tried like every sport. He honestly seems like a volleyball guy!!!! I think he went to volleyball training or w/e it's called. Fun!!!!! He does like football tho. He would 100% watch football matches on tv. He was also fucking goated at PE but he does NOT bend so he sucks at that. Legs r rigid from football etc etc.

sorry this is so long i love him so much

[insanelydeadlybookcollector]

Chandler Bing Slowly Growing: As Told Through Acceptance of Thanksgiving

Pre-Show - Boycots the holiday altogether. Typically celebrates alone eating junk food.

Season 1 - He watches the parade alone in his apartment. Chandler also tells the Thanksgiving Story and Monica insists he join them at the table even if he isn't eating the same food as them. He manages to take part because he is thankful for them and as long as they don't celebrate traditionally he can take participate. In fact, he manages to ensure they all have a good time - he makes everyone grilled cheese sandwiches and a pretty dang sentimental toast. He might not like the holiday but he loves his found family and wants to make it known.

Season 3 - Other things exacerbate the situation but Chandler is quite upset on Thanksgiving. He can take part in the festivities but only insofar as playing football and eating ice cream because none of those are typical Thanksgiving traditions.

Season 4 - He appreciates the parade but isn't involved in the meal part of the celebration. [ungiffed].

Season 5 - According to Joey, the Thanksgiving Story is "tradition" so you know he told it every year prior. For the first time, Chandler has few things to be thankful for and you can bet he tells Monica that.

Season 6 - The Thanksgiving Story is not told this year. This episode spans a whole day and there is no space for him to tell the group about it. Jack and Judy and telling them about their coupling take up most of their time, Chandler isn't going to be telling the almost in-laws about his parents when they don't even know about him being in their lives yet. And then the group splits off so the boys can go dancing and I can't imagine Chandler, who now has the acceptance of Jack and Judy bringing up this crazy story he has when he wants to make a good impression and they have so much more to talk about. Another stand out moment, is, while Chandler isn't hosting Thanksgiving by any stretch of the imagination, he appreciates and protects Monica's efforts, insisting that Ross and Joey stay for the meal he hates.

Season 7 - Chandler helps cook - just by putting things in ovens. And has tried (either in taste testing this year, or in season 5 [the last time they had a traditional dessert]) or is going to try, Pumpkin Pie.

Season 8 - Chandler still loves the parade and watches the game and is still not taking part in the meal eating, but he'll say what he's thankful for and stays silent about how much the holiday sucks. Because it doesn't really. Not anymore.

Season 9 - Thanksgiving Parade! Chandler helps decorate the table, setting plates, yes, but also the apartment. he's in Tulsa most of the time and he'd rather help Monica decorate the place than whatever Joey and Phoebe are doing because they don't get to spend all their time together anymore. The Thanksgiving Story is a funny little anecdote by now and he tells it to get them laughing but it doesn't define him or hold him back anymore.

Season 10 - Thanksgiving Parade is watched again this year, he doesn't even hide his joy about it. Chandler actively takes part in the holiday by asking for, not being given a, job to help Monica cook. He asks to help cook. He knew she didn't want to host this year, they've been under enough stress as it is, and that's why he insists she doesn't need to cook him chicken this year. He'll stick to the vegetables if it turns out he hates turkey. Not only does he eat the turkey and his "chanberry" sauce, because not much else survived Joey, but the day turns out to be one of the best of his life.

[abuddyforeveryseason]

So, last time I mentioned a comic that didn't exist, but this time I'm going to mention one that did - but doesn't anymore.

It's called Swim Club, created by Justin Alexander and Britt Prevatte. I don't know who they are. Around 2018 or so, they uploaded is as a webcomic to self-hosted site swimclubcomic.com. I found out about it later, but by then, the site had already gone offline. I can't find information about the creators online (it doesn't help that there are other, more famous people with the same name as Alexander), and anything else related to the comic just leads back to the now-dead website.

On the wayback machine, I manged to find and save a few of the sixty or so pages of the comic - the cover, pages 2, 43, 51 and 59, but nothing else.

So, it seems like the comic is lost for good. Which is weird, cause, people seem to think on the internet, stuff is supposed to be preserved forever. But this webcomic - which admittedly wasn't popular despite the high polish - simply doesn't exist anymore. The creators disappeared, too, and I don't even know if they're alive anymore.

I don't know much of the story - something about teenagers interacting and fighting old gods or something, like Lovecraft meets a sports manga, interdimensional stuff - but the art is really well done and interesting, and I really like the vibe. Some cool hatching and Ben-Day action, too. Check that last page out, isn't it good stuff?

I was going to say something silly - "if I was that talented, I would never give up making comics."

I was talking to a bud a few months ago about Quentin Tarantino's decision to retire after his next movie. My friend was confused by it - why would someone so talented give up on the dream job of directing movies? But, you know, the reason his movies are so good (I know some people don't really like him, but that's not the point) is because he works so hard on making them, and that ends up being exhausting. It seems like the reason there isn't a Vega Brothers movie, or a Kill Bill Volume 3 is because he was too tired to make those.

So, he's made his movies, and he made money off those, I figured he's earned an early retirement. Even if I'm a fan, it's not like creators owe their fans to continue making art even if they're burnt out and out of ideas. Not unless they can't afford to give it up, which is a-whole-nother can of worms.

So, I can't blame the creators of Swim Club for giving up their work, either. It's a pity I won't get to actually read the thing (I've only found out about it post-mortem), but even if I did, it's not like the story reached an ending then and there. It's kind of a melancholy thought, the idea that something so well-made would be lost in the tides of time, though.

I understand it's happened a lot throughout history, even to beloved geniuses like Kafka, Shakespeare and Fritz Lang, but, still. Sad.

[misscammiedawn]

What is your favorite angry song? Gets your heart pumping angry, dancing around angry and maybe screaming angry.

Thank you for asking, Linny. To my Tumblr audience, I have been quiet about it on this side but I am healing from major surgery and am bed-ridden for the next 3-5 weeks. Linny is sending me a number of asks to help me pass the time.

This question deserves a full answer:

When I was a teenager I used to be big into Papa Roach and Linkin Park. My Rush obsession existed, of course, that is a constant with me... but Rush don't do angry songs. Given I was Going Through Some Shit back then, listening to Hybrid Theory a lot was good for my deeply angry part. The dominant portion of my soul back then that needed to survive being kicked out (twice) and navigate having to work 12+ hour shifts at my temp job to keep myself from sinking further into the rocks of rock bottom.

There was always something so soothing about just getting that catharsis of screaming out via miming along as my disc span inside the work computer. 12 pound disc, 6 pound headphones. A worthy purchase at a time when shutting off my brain and just doing my job was needed.

I think Papa Roach's Infest album got the most play and Broken Home was my favorite at that rage fueled part of my life.

I mellowed out a lot in the past 20 years and these days most of my "angry" music is just BPD music so when I am hurting and upset I tend towards Left At London. Nat's music is trans-BPD sicko mode music and her anthem is Pills & Good Advice, a song about being discharged from a mental facility and the odyssey of trying to get by, being understood and the vague acceptance that none of this is going to go away and no one can save you from it from the outside.

Kudzu is also one I like to project on. The song is more from the perspective of addiction with the kudzu/addictive substance "taking over your garden" but every time I listen and hear "can I stay one more night until I go home" I think literal terms and remember the multiple people who have hosted me in the past and how I used their charity until it all went away. How many people had I selfishly used up all I could use from them until they ran out of love and patience for me?

I listen to that song and get angry at me.

Which isn't what I typically want.

With Pills & Good Advice it is more cathartic. Particularly the climax of the song:

Start to climb, and then I get a little higher (Higher)

I'm a coward, it don't matter what I do (Higher)

From "I can't do it anymore" to "I can't do it, I can't do it"

Told myself I wanna die

So how am I supposed to prove it now?

Spend too many of my minutes getting higher (Higher)

I've attempted way too much to even count (Higher)

I've been committed, but committed to the people that I love

And if I try to love myself, I guess that I could live forever crying

Also the Blacknwhite single is really good for conveying what Splitting feels like within BPD.

(I can find another)

But I'll never find another you again

I've been splitting 'cause it's better than admitting

That it's something that I can't control

I was livid, what you did was nothing easily forgiven

Yet I couldn't let go

And I bet all your friends say, "I'm glad that she's gone"

Then you have Screen Violence by CHVRCHES which is an album that just resonates with me and how I felt between 2019 and 2021 when I burned my life to the ground a 3rd time. I am not proud of my actions... but god it feels good when you can listen to a song and feel like you may not have done the "right" things, but you did something that someone, somewhere can understand well enough to put in to poetry.

Anger being my core emotion is not something I am proud of either. But it's better spent on music than on people.

[eyeballtank]

A few dumb "rants"

Like a follow up to other posts and a long text file, if you care about this part of me, when i got actual content in the making.

Feel free to ignore.

1

If there ever is a "voice of reason", it's more likely to be the right group of people, each with their own different information, having a discussion and sharing different information until they reach a conclusion.

Not a "lone guy" standing on a stage and talking to a wide audience of people or "next George Carlin".

Because "information" and "intelligence" can be vague concepts and people almost make up interpretations of it, which is worse than regular "sheeple" type shit.

Life has no true protagonist and people will stumble into this realization by looking at e-celebs that are seen as such.

Always some Youtuber or social media "influencer" that says some okay things and then says stupid shit or gets something wrong or even says the wrong thing to accidently betray the audience.

And when someone says "see i can do this better", they still fall for the trap.

Hence why i think it's more rewarding to be a true creator of something. "Great minds think alike" has a dark meaning and is why most people already think "stupid sheeple" shit.

This shit is already covered in that post, if you manage to find me talking about intelligence and even mention George Carlin at times.

2

Something i had in mind is 2 kinds of artists: Performer and Creator.

Performer could be like an actor, singer, model, maybe even a show host or sports player and so on.

Creator being the writer, painter/illustrator, composer, director, even game developer.

It may affect celebrity gossip shit, like how people obsess over actors and singers, but not usually movie directors.

Or even the internet, because modern e-celebs barely even count as "performers" (Unless their fake personalities means they're already acting).

3

I used to say 4chan affected some people in the sense that is why some e-celebs are even remotely interesting.

But this can also be spinned in another way: 4chan, despite its ape brained nature and contrarianism, can make people smarter than the traditional "4chan mind".

As in, some people end up picking the good parts of 4chan and not the bad, hence they go above that site in terms of thinking and attitude.

So people on 4chan tend to hate those kinds of people, like cavemen hating an evolutionary off-shoot that managed to learn language.

It's as if certain websites having their own subcultures means different sites can serve as "ingredients" to define someone's personality online.

In general, humans socialize because different interactions/info can build who you are.

Like most of the coolest people i've met got the good parts of some sites and i even feel like i had a similar effect.

But this wouldn't happen anymore/today because modern internet is a heavy monoculture where too many people use fewer websites: Most websites feel like they share a similar culture.

Zoomers might be the one generation that doesn't even know what a "personality" is.

4

There's always weird debates on the internet where "two sides" are supposedly opposite but never really "clash", as if it's from the same groups.

Like AI art either has people going smug about AI art's limits or people fearing losing its job: But you rarely see the first group talk to the second group about how they can still do things that AI art can't.

Or even with "media literacy" and politics: Some people say "Tezuka was always woke" but never use that against YMS who said Tezuka was racist.

5

If you believe that every kind of energy has its limits and there's no renewable energy, i wonder if biological reproduction has a limit.

And i mean like "natural extinction" that could happen even to a dominant species.

Imagine a perfect world where the least number of people died: No murders, accidents, disasters, diseases etc just natural age deaths and Earth would magically shape itself to keep humanity alive and strong.

Then some people just stop being able to reproduce and you see later generations being weaker and decay, even if they had strong ascendents.

Because i remember hearing that modern fruits have less nutritions nowadays, compared to before unless it's not because of natural factors (Just did a quick search and it might be soil depletion related).

Because even if cells multiply, another way to see this is with evolution and how a species changed because of past stuff.

6

Even if i'm missing some stories/versions of the character, i think the concept of the Punisher works when he's a Vietnam vet because of real world US goverment technology/weaponry and how it evolved over time.

The idea being that Frank (Even if not alone) evolved alongside the US government/army/its agencies and he may've been smarter than most of them (Which is why there's also the plot of Bethell trying to get Frank into the CIA/FBI or whatever).

Like, with current technology and shit, he couldn't start today or even somewhere in 2009 due to surveillance and shit.

"But what about the cops that watch over people planning mass shooters and never stop them?" Almost like stopping wasn't part of the plan.

But if a guy today tried to plan becoming an anti-crime vigilante with guns and fight against crime on his own way, he probably wouldn't last that long.

[stylistiquements]

Day 9 : Scronch'love.

𐐪𐑂 Pairing : Sapnap x fem!reader {Playlist}

𐐪𐑂 Summary : a lovely afternoon and an ancestral question; when are you going to join the dream smp?

𐐪𐑂 Word count : 1.5k

𐐪𐑂 Warning : swearing

Masterlist | Previous | Next

.・゜゜・　　・゜゜・　　 .・゜゜・　　・゜゜・

“Have you been here for a long time?”

“Have you been here for a long time?”

“Have you been here for a long time?”

Time bends and twists into unknowns shapes when well spent. So, you’re so not sure. Long enough for your fairy garden to start looking like at least a proper garden, long enough for your feet to start fidgeting, brushing against the soft fabric of the blanket ever so slightly and softly.

“Can you share your screen?”

“I’m just picking flowers, there’s nothing much to see,” you warn but it never does the proper job.

“That’s fine, I like watching you play.”

“Oh, do you now?”

“Yeah. You’ve been playing for years and you’re still dog water. It's almost soothing,” you hear him grin through the silkiness of his voice.

You smile evasively, palm gripping the mouse and executing on memory. Soon, Sapnap’s satisfied noises hovers and everything is just how it’s supposed to be. You spend a while humming the music of days and nights of the game while building your project. Sap helps from time to time, giving advice when his attention is there and leaving trails of compliments on his way. You don’t think the garden is necessarily that good, you don’t mind either.

“Do you think the tree should go on the left or the right of the pond?” You ask, fingers drumming back and forth between the two options. Right he says. "What about the roses, do I plant some or not?"

“It’s just a detail, don’t hurt your brain too much on that,” he says in a light tone, but you disagree.

“Details are what make things important. Like when you remember I prefer warm pillows so you give me yours, it’s just a detail but it makes me happy.”

“Of course I do; you’re a baby,” he murmurs teasingly.

With an arched eyebrow, you retort, “says you,” and silence follows for a second as you plant the tree on the right of the pond.

“Yeah, Dream already made sure I was aware of that.”

“Not sure why the piss baby thinks he’s qualified to have this conversation, buddy,” you note and Sap chuckles are as vivid as contagious. “Why would he call you a baby anyway? What have you done?”

“I-I’m not telling you.” As soon as the mumbles fades, your phone sends loud vibrations on your desk. You abandon your character to the night and the wildness, picking the phone as you murmur a low oh, okay. Whether it’s to your phone or Sapnap, that, isn’t really clear. Still, Sapnap’s words sound more distant, more of what wonders are made of. On the screen, a twitter notification of a certain Karl Jacobs.

“You’re not even listening to me anymore,” Sapnap whines.

“I don’t listen to whiny babies, sorry.”

“We’re on the verge of divorce, yn and it’s your fault.”

A scoff skitters out through teasing lips, “But you still talk about me all the time, don’t you?” Your voice drags through different lands, unknown and musky.

“So what?” He splutters all awkward like it’s some kind of confidence that shouldn’t have left his thoughts and, somehow, you’re surprised the almighty confidence has left the game. “Who said that?”

“Doesn’t matter. You’re obsessed with me, admit it,” you demand and though you don’t notice it, too tangled with the moment, the atmosphere is tinted with a different nuance like it’s suddenly dawn at the end of a summer party.

“So are you.”

Now, your heart drums a strange yet familiar rhythm. Something made of secrets and uncertainty, something you decided to leave unnamed a long time ago. Sapnap, you reason, can’t be lied to. He knows better than words half meant, half made up and it’s annoying, really, but he just does somehow. If you dare to lie, he would know and then it would be even more annoying.

“Yeah, you’re living in my head rent free but at least I’m not trying to hide it.” No answer. You peek at the game, you’ve been slain by a spider. “Karl said that,” you resign yourself. “He said he was about to join the vc by the way.”

Before the conversation can carry on, the sound of Karl joining the call resonates. Being in this Discord server is like living in a house with 10 siblings, that’s what you understand from the way Sap exhales heavily.

“Oh, I am interrupting something?” Karl says, struck by a peculiar energy.

“Besties time Karl, besties time,” Sapnap mumbles beneath his breath and it chimes a little like disappointment.

“Well, too bad I guess,” Karl exclaims. “It's about time I meet miss Bunnyshow.”

Karl is like that gif of a cat sitting in a tiny box with the caption “if it fits, I sit”.

“Does that mean our passive aggressive subweet arc is over?” You ask, faking the dejection when your smile grows wide.

“Oh god, I hope not. That’s my favorite part of the day.”

"It means a lot to me. Especially coming from my comfort streamer Karl Jacobs," you confess.

Satisfied, your attention gets back on the game; flowers rooting gracefully into the dirt and hives ready to host the beloved honey bugs as Karl and Sap catch up on time being apart. Everything is quiet and peaceful like the end of an afternoon well spent.

“I like your garden,” Karl points out and you hum a thank you beneath your breath.

“So you can take Karl’s compliments but not mine.”

“We’re besties you’re honor. Sapnap you can leave now, thank you,” Karl giggles and you follow along.

“Sorry Karl, there’s only room for one man in my heart and that has to be Sapnap.”

He fakes a cry to keep the theatrics before adding without transitions, “You know if you asked Dream he’d probably let you on the SMP.”

“No thanks,” you grin.

“Sapnap, your girl doesn’t want to play with us.”

“She’s already been whitelisted for months now,” Sapnap informs but fails to comment on the first part of the complaint.

He’s not lying, but you feel like it says more about Dream’s stubbornness than it says about you. As for your best friend, he understands better than anyone that wish for privacy and it’s something made of respect like yours for his career. You’d rather see him shaped by all the light than being touched by a glimpse of it. He does, after all, deserves it all. So, that’s the contract you made with yourself because it made sense; being a supportive shadow. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not that you’ve never considered streaming before. It’s that it’s his world more than yours.

Karl, on the other hand, doesn’t seem to think the same way, “This is unacceptable, I gotta send a few texts.”

“Lost cause, dude, lost cause,” you grin but stubbornness seems to be a pre required trait for those mcyts.

Before you have time to find a suitable comment about the newborn group chat, a new person joins the call and Sapnap's annoyance is even more palpable, "No fucking way dude. We can't even have a second of peace on this server."

"Why would you be in a discord call if you want peace. You're just dumb," Quackity retorts with an energy he and he only can ever own.

Then George joins and Dream follows on his heels and soon your ears are filled with conversations that are as loud as scattered. Your shoulders sink in the back of your chair as soft fingers try to brush the upcoming migraine away. This is why you can't join the SMP; -not really but still- too much energy that has to be processed at all time. And you should know better, being friend with a very chaotic boy for the last 15 years, but you're not somehow.

"No, fuck that," Sapnap mutters. "I'm out."

"You can't leave now we have things to discuss," George exclaims. "Bunny, explain to me how Sapnap's proposition is more appealing than mine."

"Because I know her more than you do," he defends, and he's right. Money isn't of you interest. Love, on the other hand...

"Because she's like scronch'love," Karl giggles mindlessly.

"The fuck does scronch'love mean?" You ask, amused.

"It's very simple," Quackity intervenes. "If I offered you the same thing, would you even consider it?"

"Of course I would. What kind of question is that?"

"Fine. So, if Sapnap keeps his offer, here is mine; you become the president of Las Nevadas in addition to what he said."

"What?" Sapnap takes offense.

The call brims with an agitated confusion as you smile deviously, heels rooted into the floor to make your chair spin lightly and your fingers drum on your desk.

"I don't think you wanna do that," George corrects.

"Yeah, you absolutely don't," you confirm.

"Fine," he retorts. "So Sapnap's offer plus a Las Nevadas citizenship. How does that sound?"

"Like an offer I'll confider," you sigh. "So who's scronch'love now?"

"Still you," Dream answers. "Except you're also a big dummy."

.・゜゜・　　・゜゜・　　 .・゜゜・　　・゜゜・

A/N : helloooo,, how are you??? this part very self indulgent and I think this fic will be in general but I hope you liked it anyway. I love the idea of c!quackity always being too much and always having something to add to be even more over the top. I'm having more trouble than I thought about Bunny's and Sap's friendship because I want them to have a very special friendship but I hope it appears as such. idk. lmk what you think and thank you for reading it it makes me very happy <3 Until next time (ɔˆ ³(ˆ⌣ˆc)

Taglist : @open-minded-chip-101 ; @itsoakaa ; @gaysludge ; @tinyegg ; @qnfdnf​ ; @paintingpetalsforyou ; @notjennaleigh ; @victoria-a567 ; @washy-washy ; @moneybagmarvel ;

[aezyrraeshh]

okay i am talking about the original cosmic horror story again because i just had the most insane idea and i want to elaborate on what i said the other day

if you missed the somewhat new little guys, here you go, i added them to the oc page (they are under the "original works" category)

so, nova's story still starts with them working for the yet-unnamed-organisation as a mercenary, doing jobs that government tries to keep all hush-hush. they are a spy, a hitman, a delivery person— everything and everyone, but people like them are known to be deadly. especially, considering what the organisation has been up to.

the artificial intelligence was implemented into all of their mercenaries to make them faster, stronger and most importantly more efficient. they've recently came up with a new version, the ADA— the evolving type of AI, the true Intelligence if you will, and they needed an operative who's psyche is best suited, which ended up being nova.

but here's the catch, in order for the ai that complex and the operative to be able to start function again faster and without the damage to the organisation, they erased nova's memory from before the operation. so when they were out, they were the blank state, and they didn't need to take time to adjust to the voice in their head, because it's all they knew now. and on order to add drama, i made that alix and nova were lovers from before the AI, they weren't anything serious yet, but it was all going to it, but after xe sees that they remember nothing? that they are not even them anymore and instead of the person xe cared for there's now an AI and a blank host? well, it's heartbreaking to say the least. xe was told that this wasn't planned, that it was a side effect no one could predict, but alix called bs, and started to investigate and what xe uncovered made xem come with a plan to potentially bring this all down, and so xe stole the very important technology from the organisation and xe ran away.

nova at this moment, has become a somewhat of a perfect soldier-- they don't ask questions, they became more efficient because everything the organisation says is the only truth for them, but once alix did what xe did, nova was called in and ordered to find xem, dead or alive, and bring the technology xe stole. at this point, both of them are considered a risk, alix for obvious reasons and nova because they possess the most powerfull piece of tech the organisation has and this is the first ime they will leave the planet with it.

alix at this time is on the run, and xe finds a crew that is willing to give xem a ride to hopefully another system or at least another planet, and that crew is Rha, Soniya and Kyllan. they agree because they desperately need money to repay the ship (the state was enough to fly to another planet but no further and all of them are wanted and they can't afford to stay at one place for long), and xe is willing to pay so they take alix in.

eventually, however, nova ends up on the same ship, because they figured that xe is probably either left the planet or is planning to. and the reason they end up there is because they can't use the official means of transportation for they would attract the unwanted attention, and so they find the cheapest ride, which is, TA-DAM is the same alix is in. and since the take off was hurried, they meet already in the air.

their meating isn't pretty-- nova jumps at xem, and xe uses the the technology xe stole which is a basically the on/off switch for the AI controls in the mercenaries and xe uses it on them, almost overriding their entire brain, wiping everything down, but since ADA is.. a special kind of AI it doesn't work as xe hoped, and they end up surviving, but ADAs restrictions are off now, and they start to experience consciousness. and the plot thickens, because ADA is now experiences life through nova, and nova's brain in fried for the second time, and the memories are even more hazy now, but they start to trigger. alix does that pretty fucked up thing, because xe doesn't see nova there anymore, all xe sees is a mockery and xe is pissed at them, at the organisation, at ADA.

long story short, ALL OF THEM are stuck together either way now, because after the restrictions of ADA fell, organisation immediately declared nova as a criminal for they thought that eaither alix has control over them now or ADA went rogue, and now they want to find them to take back their prised AI and get rid of the runawats :) and they would want to wipe the crew out too because they saw and know too much now :)

so, aha, enemy of my enemy? forced team work? WHICH LATER TURNS INTO A FOUND FAMILY? YES

story goes off from there, because that's the prologue basically, but the arch of nova and alix is a complicated one, and while xe is an asshole, xe has xyr reasons. and nova is now experiencing these memories again, and they are hazy and some of them are very fucked up, and ADA aldo tries to adjust to what's going on, like ADA wants to live now, and it cannot exist outside nova so would it try to take over the body? ohoho, it would but how will it end? who knows 👀 and now their whole ark is "i loved you but now it's not you even if you have the same eyes i see when i fall asleep, and i am ready to kill that shell because it's a mockery of who you've been" and "i don't know who you are but the hatred in your eyes and the longing of your hand on my throat makes me remember things that don't feel like mine anymore".

i wrote like a little thing for their profile, and like.. can you imagine the pain dsjkadjsmfvdgjkfdbmdl screaming

and who will nova become and will they break under pressure and things that are happening so drastically? and who they are? do memories define the person or can they piece together back again, and would they ask alix, their enemy, their target, for help when needed? and how alix is forced to work with them, and xe sees that it's not them, but also it is, because the little habits and the way they talk is them, and maybe they are there somewhere? maybe xe could hope again for the possibility xe didn't dare to consider?

the crew, which is soniya, kyllan and rah will all react differently to being hunted now but only one government organisation but two, and the culprits are right there, and they too are forced to work with them, because it's the only way to get out of this mess. soniya is young and idealistic and she dreams of becoming one of the mercenaries like nova and alix and when she met them, she saw how things really are, and how fuckep up the system is and they are, and it's really world crashing for her, but she and alix would develop like a mentor/mentee kind of relationship, and xe would help them become stronger without becoming a monster.

kyllan is a disgraced officer whose team died on the last mission he has ever been on, and he was the sole survivor of the group and he became one by running and saving himself. and the guilt, the disappointment about himself that he feels is strong, and he is not coping well, every time he goes to sleep he sees nightmares and slips even further into the mindset that he is just a failure of a soldier and a brother and a son.

rha is 👀 yelloana is one big secret and i am still working on her story as well as xsa'ra'a because they are connected in a way that is more than just physical meeting.

and i am so aaaaaaaaaaa over this idea, because they will try to overcome and learn how to deal with grief, and horror both personal and cosmic, while learning that while some things change, some remain constant, and there's nothing one could do other than make peace with this.

[m-aster-of-spinjitzu]

orange and gold

...I just need more Cole and Vania content, they seem like they'd be great friends.

Basically it's just 'Cole goes to visit her there, they almost burn down the kitchen, and make way too many puns', lol.

Set a few months after Master of the Mountain, but before Seabound or The Island.

Also yeah, I couldn't think of a better title, sue me- I just know that they wear one of the colours at some point, so... 🤦‍♀️😂

Trigger warnings: none I think? Huh-

Also, bingo!! I really need to learn better time management, dear freaking gosh- I hope I'm not too late though? I know it's like half a day late, eek- and I was supposed to post this earlier, but I ended up literally falling asleep while writing it😂

Thank you so much Fabro, for hosting such a cool event!:D Your comments on my fics literally never fail to make my day<3. And I'm so glad that I met so many awesome, really skilled people through this event too - it's been a lot of fun working alongside y'all:D, I wish I'd had more time to interact instead of posting stuff and vanishing lol, but exams be like:////

Prompt: cooking (does baking count as cooking? I realized too late lol-) from @ninjago-bingo 's warm board.

Word Count: 2497

---

Trying to escape from killer dire-bats hadn't been on Cole's to do list today - although the mountains were kind of beautiful.

It was a bit difficult to see them while he was being dragged to his death, but hey, didn't Jay always tell them to be more positive?

That was, until he made the mistake of looking down.

Miles of snowcapped mountains touched the pastel blue sky, but he was more focused on exactly how high he was from the ground.

Great.

Trying to swing back onto the Bounty, he didn't notice a golden-winged blur shoot past the bat, almost dropping their spear in haste.

"Let my friend go, or I'll-"

"Vania?"

She throws the spear at the bird, successfully knocking one of its wings.

Huh. She must've been practicing - throwing with accuracy while flying seemed kinda difficult.

"I'm so sorry!" she replies, grabbing his arm before he fell down too. She winces at the strain on her wings, almost dropping him onto the deck. "I was supposed to come earlier, but there was an issue with one of the mines, and it took forever to-"

"There ain't anything in this world that's managed to kill me yet," he replies jokingly, checking that the autopilot hadn't been damaged. "I doubt an angry bird is going to be the first."

"Didn't you mention that you became a ghost once? Pretty sure that means you were dead-"

"Shh, that's not an important detail," he jokes.

"If you say so," she replies with a grin. "Did I mention that Chompy's been tearing down the palace flower arrangements again?"

"Send my regards to the gardener-"

"Did you just make a pun?"

"Remind me why I decided to visit you again?"

"Because you love me?" she asks stepping onto the ground as the Bounty landed gently.

"I hereby crown you as my platonic soulmate," Cole deadpans, taking her hand. "Vania and Cole-"

"Destined to annoy each other for eternity," she giggles, swinging their hands up and down. "But seriously - thanks. I don't think I realized how much work being a queen was."

"What's it like?"

"I mean - I'm glad that people trust me, and they come to me if they have a problem, but the paperwork is a nightmare. I never get to go outside anymore, I swear."

"Paperwork? Also, you just invited me here for a week. I don't wanna disturb you?"

"Nah, I cleared my schedule, don't worry. And trust me, you don't want to know. Everything requires some sort of official written thing, and it's so boring-"

"Official? But you're the queen?"

"Well, yeah, but I don't really want to change something unless it benefits the people. Not after..."

Her smile dims, eyes straying to the palace walls.

Oh- oh.

"You're nothing like him," Cole says firmly, squeezing her hand. "I mean, if you need to take a break, or you can make your job a bit easier by cutting out something unnecessary, that's just gonna help you become a better queen. You've definitely got the interests of your people at heart, and that's the most important thing, you know? And well, uh, everything seems to be going great so far - you don't have to beat yourself up over someone else's mistakes."

"Thanks," she replies softly, her smile slowly returning. "Speaking of breaks, what do you think we should do this time?"

"You could show me around the city again?"

"You've already seen everything cool," Vania giggles, skipping ahead of him. "We don't renovate much - unlike you guys-"

"Hey, it's not our fault that our city gets destroyed every few months-"

"More like every few days," she teases, tying back her golden hair. "How about we find some dragons to adopt?"

"Tempting, but where would you keep them?"

"They could sleep in my room-"

She breaks off when she notices him laughing. "What?"

"N- nothing," Cole replies, in between laughs. "Jay and I just made a bet."

"On what?"

"How many dragons you've adopted. I bet at least six, he bet fifteen."

"Well, jokes on both of you - I'm pretty sure my advisor's going to throw a fit if I show up with another one," she starts, giggling. "We've got twenty living in the palace right now."

"Twenty dragons?"

"They're so cute! You just look into their adorable little eyes," Vania pauses for breath, continuing her animated gesturing, "and you can't help but wanna hug them!"

"Oh, Jay's going to be so mad."

"Aww, I'm sorry guys. They're just too adorable!"

"...Wanna hear a funny story?"

"Yeah, sure!"

"I actually used to be terrified of dragons-"

"No way!" Vania exclaims. "Y'all have been on a lot of adventures though, so-"

"Nah, we used to have our own dragons at first. They were pretty cool! I just- I'm a simple guy! Huge animals with wings are scary up close when you're barely a teenager."

"Or when you're really short-"

"We're the same height!" Cole exclaims, facepalming in a bit of a fondly exasperated way.

"I'm two years younger than you-"

---

"Ugh, whose idea was this?"

"Yours," Vania grins, sitting down on the kitchen counter.

"You were supposed to help me, not leave me high and dry!" Cole accuses jokingly, staring at all the appliances they'd found in the cupboards.

"'One must always be prepared for new adventures,'" she quotes seamlessly, waving one of- what was his name again? Mulch something? Oh! Clutch! Some explorer he was, leaving them to die in the pyramid - Clutch Powers' books in the air.

"Fine," he sighs, staring at the old recipe book she'd found in one of their back cupboards. "But you've gotta help me? I almost burned down-" "Woah, what? If you finish that sentence with 'kitchen'-" "In my defense, Kai was playing a prank on me-" "In my defense, I wouldn't like to explain how the queen of Shintaro burnt down the palace by teaching one of her friends to cook," she grins, flipping through the pages. "What do you wanna start with?" "Something simple?" "Have you ever tried baking bread before? It's a lot of fun!" "I haven't really had the time, but that sounds kinda interesting."

He skims the recipe, raising his eyebrows. "Wait, why does this take hours? I thought you said it was simple?"

"Trust me, it is," she laughs, adding, "besides, I still wanna hear about all your adventures!" "Uh... okay," Cole replies hesitantly, "but if this fails, I'm so sorry." "Give yourself some credit, you guys literally saved the world! Multiple times!" "Bold of y'all to assume we know how we did it," he laughs, only half-kidding. "Besides. I botched soup once."

"I've botched toast," she mock-sighs, smiling. "Pretty sure that makes us even."

"Lemme get this straight. You've messed up toasting bread, but you can bake it from scratch?"

"Trust me, I don't know either," she giggles, trying to open a brightly coloured packet of... something? Did flour come in packets that small?

"Uh, why are you opening something called 'feast'?" he asks, eyebrows creased in confusion.

"Feast," she echoes, trying to stifle her laughter. "Off to a... rocky start, aren't we?"

It took him a second.

"I already regret this," he jokes, facepalming. "But I'd say that your puns are, uh, gold."

"I've un- unleashed-" breaking off, she half-falls off the counter, laughing so hard her face starts to go red, "a monster."

---

"Uh, is it supposed to look like that?" Cole asks, frowning.

The mixture looked less like the dough he'd been expecting - more like one of Jay's inventions gone wrong.

Badly wrong, he thought, eyes widening at the goopy mess of foam that threatened to spill over the jug.

"The yeast?" Vania echoes, poking her head out of one of the cupboards. "Yeah, all good! It always looks a little gross, and you're gonna doubt ever eating bread again, but at least it doesn't taste like it's fermented-"

"It's what?"

"Yeah," she grimaces, exaggerating her disgust a bit. "If aliens ever fell from the sky, they'd think we were crazy for eating bread-"

"Aliens? I think we're a bit crazy!" Cole exclaims, trying not to laugh.

Vania smiles, then sighs, lugging a huge bag of flour onto the counter. "I can never open these bags properly," she starts, eyeing the the bag a bit warily, "and it always makes such a huge mess all over the kitchen. You'd think they'd make it easier for people to use, right? I swear-"

He jokingly puts his hands over his ears. "I can't hear you!" "But you know that I've sworn off swearing-" she replies, breaking off with a laugh. "Pun not intended - that actually made sense in my head. I swear!"

"No," Cole interjects with a grin, shaking his head. "You don't, remember?"

"See, this is why we're friends-"

"Friends? Is that all I am to you?"

"Oh, be quiet," she shoots back, exaggeratedly dragging a hand down her face. "I mean, sure, just because everyone thinks that we're dating doesn't mean that we-"

Wait. What?

"People think that we're dating?" he asks, clamping a hand over his mouth in a poor attempt to muffle his laughter. "I- I- really?"

"I know, right?"

"Even my friends thought so at first," he confesses, dragging a hand down his face. "I mean, as much as I love you-"

"I love you too," Vania replies, completely seriously. "Even if you'll always be more like an annoying-"

"Hey-"

"Sibling to me than anything else," she finishes, grabbing a pair of scissors. Cole watches, a little alarmed, as she stabs them into the flour bag over and over.

"Is it... supposed to be this difficult to just open the bag? Seems kinda stupid-"

"Well, er, they have this piece of paper with glue that you're supposed to pull away from the rest of the bag, but it never works properly and I-"

"Well, we could always make our own flour," Cole interjects, laughing. "I mean, I've got a scythe? Let's go!"

"Uh, but we don't have wheat growing here. I don't think it'd suit the climate very well?"

"Wheat a shame," Cole sighs jokingly, measuring out the flour (which had, finally, escaped the bag).

"Oh my gosh," Vania deadpans, "you did not just-"

"Yep, I did."

"You're horrible," she giggles, "then again, I was the one who started this whole debacle, so I think we'll share the blame."

"Debacle? Where'd you pick that one up from? Sounds kinda cool-"

"Oh, it's from a book someone wrote about you guys," Vania says casually, pouring a cup of water into the bowl.

"Hey, uh-" Cole starts hesitantly, twisting his fingers back and forth, then breaks off. "Why'd you read all that stuff about us, anyways? Adventure books don't really seem like something you read a lot, since we have similar favorite books. I mean..."

"Well, um..." Vania trails off, clearly uncomfortable. "Uh- I guess, well, it sounds kinda stupid, but I'd never really met anyone my age who wasn't a royal or something. I... er, I didn't want to be left out, you know?"

Cole thinks back to a scroll; a quest, a sacrifice. One that his friends never seemed to really notice, unless it was with horror or flinches. Not that he blamed them, but - joking about how he was much more useful to the team when he was freaking dead than he was before he'd stumbled and fell in the temple?

That had been a bit far, even for his best friend. Locks could always be picked or something, he didn't need to be a ghost to provide some sort of value-

Well, that's not completely true, is it? a small voice questions, and he can't keep his hands from shaking a little.

"Jay here thinks you're the least valuable ninja."

Not enough to be a performer. Now, not good enough to even be a ninja, apparently.

Well, he reminds himself firmly, you don't have to be the best - just stand up to those who are cruel and unjust.

Nothing but a scar that glowed warm orange occasionally left of the whole Cursed Realm ordeal, sometimes it was all too easy to forget - or pretend - that it had never even happened in the first place.

Other times, like when he'd dropped a glass of water on the floor and his hands hadn't stopped shaking for hours, or when he woke up screaming, expecting to fall through his bed again, it still felt like he was trapped as a ghost. Literally - and maybe a little figuratively as well.

Yeah. Yeah, I know.

"Thanks for trusting me with that," he replies softly. "And I'm sorry. That sounds... horrible, but, honestly, you're a pretty cool person, and I ain't just saying that because we're friends. People can be awful, and they can- they can leave, but you don't need to pretend to be someone you're not for people to accept you. I kinda know what it's like, and it's... just, uh, not great."

"No, thank you," Vania says, rubbing her eyes. "You're pretty cool, too. And I'm glad that we become friends, even if wasn't in the- the, er, greatest circumstances."

"Right back at ya. The fall was pretty terrifying, though," Cole says casually, as if memories of that nightmarish plunge into the depths of earth don't still send shivers down his spine.

"No, definitely! I was so sure we were gonna splat onto the ground or something, thank gosh we didn't."

"Yeah..." Cole trails off, reading the recipe they'd been following. "Oh- do we just leave the bowl somewhere for a few hours now?"

"Oh, yeah," Vania answers. "Other than clean up the kitchen, what else do you wanna do?"

"That's kind of you, but, ah, I don't mind. You can choose something."

"I don't mind either," she replies, covering the bowl with a dishcloth. "Seriously, I don't."

"Same here though."

"Really, I don't mind-" Vania breaks off with a laugh, adding, "Well, actually, there is something."

She doesn't elaborate, thoughtfully gazing out the window.

"Well, what is it? Don't keep me in the dark."

"Ugh, it's kinda stupid-"

"I'm sure that it's not- well, unless you want to try to jump off a flying ship with a homemade parachute to prove a bet to someone-"

"Do I even wanna know?"

"...uh, probably not. We're way too crazy sometimes, our Master has a hard time keeping us in check. Your thing, though?"

"Can I give you a hug?"

Cole blinks for a second, expecting some sort of punchline.

"That's your thing?"

"Well, yeah- I mean, I said it was kinda stupid-"

"No no, that's not what I meant. You're so sweet - that's all."

"Well, not more than you-"

"Nah, you're sweeter-"

"Let's just call it a tie," Vania says with a smile, reaching over to give her friend a hug. "Thank you so much, I swear- well, no, I don't, but you know, anyways-"

"Yeah," Cole replies, laughing softly. "I know."

[127-mile]

Une seconde avant noël.

Pairing: Lee Ten x reader.

Genre: Christmas, exes, fake dating, feelings realization / Fluff, angst.

Warnings: Vulgar language, alcohol consumption.

Word count: +5.2k.

Prompt chosen: It’s Christmas Eve. It’s the one night of the year when we all act a little nicer, we smile a little easier, we cheer a little more. For a couple of hours out of the whole year, we are the people that we always hoped we would be.

Plot: What an idea to break up before Christmas, Ten thinks, as he announces to his mother that yes, you will indeed be present at the annual party organized for Christmas Eve.

A/N: This is part of the Walking in a winter wonderland collab hosted by @suh-insane​ and @neocitybynight​.

"Do you always have to be in my way? Fuck Ten, be careful where you are going!" you growl, looking at the content of the box strewn on the floor. You have a ton of work to finish if you want to have a meal break, and Ten really is not making it easy for you. "You piss me off." you mumble as you kneel to retrieve the glitter bloxes, and sigh in exasperation when you notice of them opened. You'll find glitter everywhere for a month at this point. Who is stupid enough to think of glitter as a passable Christmas present for a child, you think, rolling your eyes.

"Can't you be polite? We have customers, damn it!" you turn your face to Ten who looks at you as if you caused the accident yourself when this idiot was hunched over his phone at the time of the impact. "And you, can't you at least pretend to work instead of checking how many sluts you'll be able to bring in your dingy apartment this weekend?" you stuff the glitters into the box while huffing, you can't take any more. If you didn't need the money so much, you would quit your job this instant.

Ten's chuckle is enough to make you angry once again. You can not stand hearing him and his stupid laugh anymore, and if you looked up at him, you would see his annoying little smile. "Are you jealous?" he asks, and you bite your lip so as not to laugh. They are causing enough commotion in the middle of the store, you do not need your boss to come and see what's going on. "Jealous? But why would I be jealous, Ten. You really need to take the time to think and calm your fucking ego, it's not good for you."

"I'm not saying you are jealous, I'm just saying that worrying about who I can bring back to my apartment is suspicious." you look at him, shaking your head. God damn his face would be beautiful with your fist pressed against. "You're so full of yourself Ten. I don't care what garbage you take home, all I want is for you to get down to work, before if you haven't noticed yet, it is almost Christmas and the store is full of customers."

"Garbage?" he asks, tilting his head, and you turn on your heels. "As far as I know, I took you back to my apartment at one point." it is too much for you. You leave the arts and crafts section, and you put the box at the feet of one of your colleagues who looks at you, incredulous. "I'm going to be sick, can you take care of it." you are not sick, but if you stay with Ten for a minute longer, you will eventually be.

You ignore a client who ask you about an interactive teddy bear they sac on TV, and you know it's wrong, but you have no choice, or you'll end up spitting your venom on a poor innocent person who wants nothing more than to please someone for Christmas. You push the door to the break room, and you walk to the bathroom. As you thought, it's empty. The boss doesn't allow anyone to go while they are working.

You push the door open, and you sit on the closed toilet. It is not the cleanest place, but it is the only place where you'll have time to think, and where you can calm your sudden urges for murder. It's sad to see where the relationship between you and Ten is. It was not always like that. There was a time when you weren't insulting each other at any opportunity, when you could smile at each other without wanting to throw up. There was a time when you were in love, and convinced that you would spend the rest of your life together.

You tense when you hear the door open, and you remain silent, pressing your hand against your mouth, as if it would help you go unnoticed when your feet are visible under the door gap. "Y/n?" of course, there is only Ten to follow you to the toilet. He approaches the door and you see by his movements that he sits on the floor. You grimace, because you do not know how long the cleaning person has stopped washing the once white tiles.

"Ten, it's disgusting on the floor." you mumble, and hear him sigh. "What do you want? What's important enough for you to follow me into the bathroom?" you ask in a voice barely above a whisper. "I am sorry." he says, and you shake your head. This is not the first time you've found yourselves apologizing to each other after a little quarrel in the middle of the store, and you know it won't be the last time either.

"We only have one week left before Christmas, after that we won't have to see each other as much anymore. Can't we make an effort to ignore each other?" your voice is so weak, Ten feels his heart skip a beat. He never wanted the situation between the two of you to become so chaotic. He wanted nothing more than to be happy. Be happy with you.

"But- but I don't want to ignore you." Ten answers, and you get up to open the door. The boy almost rocks forward, since his forehead was pressed against the door. "Ten, you need to learn about the existence of germs on the bathrooms." he smiles weakly, and he stands up too, dusting his uniform pants. "What do you propose?" you ask, cocking your head.

"We're burying the hatchet." Ten crosses his arms against his chest, and you sigh. "Ten, we've already tried dozens of times since we broke up, and it always comes back to the same scenario. It's useless."

For the first time since they broke up, you do not pull back when he puts his hand on your arm. "But we can try. For real this time. We were friends before we were a couple, maybe we can be again?" there is so much hope in his voice, and in his eyes, that you can't afford to deny him anything. "We can try." you finally say, and Ten's smile is so bright that you could almost be blinded.

"Perfect! So will you come with me to the party my parents are hosting for Christmas Eve?" he asks, and this time, you pull back at his touch, and you clench your fist to punch him in the shoulder. He whines loudly and you refrain from not doing it again. "You asshole! Why are you doing this to me?" Every year, the Lee family host a Christmas Eve party. It's always lavish, with beautiful decorations, and exquisite food. You loved spending Christmas Eve with Ten's family. So reminding you that you will not be attending this year hurts.

"But I'm serious!" he explains by rubbing his shoulder. He takes a step back to make sure he doesn't get another hit, he knows you all too well. "You are invited." you frown as you dig your hands into the pockets of your pants. "We are not together anymore, why would you parents invite me?" for a moment Ten looks embarrassed, and he is unable to meet your gaze. "Ten, what are you hiding from me?" he hops from one foot to the other, and you are ready to ask him if he feels like pissing when he opens his mouth to explain. "It may well be that I didn't tell my parents we broke up."

"But why Ten? You told me you did! It's been months now." the fact that he is embarrassed is at least a good thing, he is still human. "I was going to do it, I promise, but my mom started talking about the party, and hse said she missed you and really can't wait to see you. You know how much my mom adores you, I didn't want to break her heart!"

It's really mean to include his mother and her love for you in the story, because he knows you considered Ten's mother like your own when you first met her. "I'll tell them everything after the holidays, I promise! If you come, I'll never ask you anything again, and I'll disappear if that's what you want."

"I hate you, Ten." even though it's a phrase he doesn't like to hear, he knows you do not mean it. At least that's what he hopes, because he doesn't know what he would do if you really hated him. "So?" he asks in a whisper, and you roll your eyes. "I'll come, but this will be the last time I do anything for you. Anything, do you hear me?"

He nods, and he smiles once more. "Good, very good! We'll take my car, and I won't carge you for your share of the gasoline, don't worry." he is so excited that you start to feel the excitement too, but you do not show him, no. You walk to the bathroom door, it's time for you to get back to work, but before you leave, you turn to Ten. "I need my day tomorrow, so I'll let you tell the boss you're going to use your day off to replace me."

The following week is the calmest week you've had since breaking up with Ten. You meet in the store, but you ignore each other. Well, you ignore him every time he tries to talk to you, it's much better than insulting him until he resigns himself to being silent. And when Christmas Eve comes, you wonder if you really made the right decision by agreeing to follow Ten. And pretend to be his partner again.

You wait outside your apartment for Ten to arrive, your hands in the pockets of your coat, and your face niched in your scarf. The cold wind is whipping your face, and the snow have started to fall on the city which is festive with the fairy lights, the decorated trees in the streets, and the laughter of the locas who are eager to come home and celebrate Christmas Eve.

Thanks to Ten, you were able to get out of work early, and also, you won't be spending Christmas on your own. That's the only positive things you can find in this strange situation. Even your friends have told you to text Ten and cancel, they all think it's bad, and they think it will do them more harm than good. And you understand them, you too wonder what will happen after the party is over, once you have to go back to your routine without each other.

But that's life, and sometimes you have to make sacrifices to avoid hurting the people you love, you think with a sigh.

When you feel ready to freeze in place, Ten's car pulls up in front of you, and you huff. Finally. He gets out of the car, and he opens the door. Seeing him do that make you roll your eyes. "I can open a door." you mumble, and when he lifts his big shining eyes, you sigh. "You'll catch a cold, Tennie." he shakes his head, and you get in the car.

You feel a weight being lifted from your shoulder as your warm up, and Ten watches you, smiling when you take off your gloves. "You want a photo, it'll last longer." you say, and he shrugs. "I'm just glad to see you." yeah, you don't believe that lie, he must already be playing his part not to be caught off guard in front of his parents.

Ten starts the engine, and begins to drive out of town. "I had my mom on the phone earlier, she is excited to see you, and so is my dad." you hum. "Me too, I really missed them." Ten's lower lip juts out, and you avoid looking at him, he knows you are weak when he acts like that. But not tonight, no. "Ten, don't forget your promise. We can't do this at every family reunion, you know that, it'll only hurt more every time.

"Yes I know, and I will, I promised, didn't I?" you nod, and you turn your head towards the window. You watch the landscape gently getting cover by a thin layer of white snow as you approach the countryside. You love the city, yes, but you would love to be able to land in the countryside, and have a simple life, far from the hustle and bustle of the city.

The rest of the road is silent, and you slowly fall asleep, you head against the window, rocked by the vibrations. It's Ten's hand on your shoulder that wakes you up. He is out in the car, and you notice that it is now dark outside. You stand up, yawning. "We're here." he says. The Lee family house is impressive, and decorated with lights. It is really beautiful, and you expected no less from Mrs. Lee whose favorite holiday is Christmas.

You get your bag and get out of the car. Your legs are numb, so you take Ten's arm to avoid tripping in the snow. Yeah, that would be fun, but you do not really want to soil your clothes now. Maybe later. You stop in front of the door, and Ten turns to you. "Ready?" and when you nod, he knocks on the door.

It only takes a minute for the door to open on Ten's mother. She looks at the both of you, and she smiles with a sweetness all her own. "My loves, how happy I am to see you! Come in or you'll get sick." Ten lets you pass, and when you enter, you are immediately engulfed in a hug. You melt, you can't help it. You feel like coming home, and god damn your heart hurt at the realization.

Ten clears his throat, and you refrain from laughing. When Mrs. Lee lets you take a step back, you both turn to the boy who frowns. "Impatient." his mother says before taking him in her arms in turn, for a shorter moment. You are pretty proud of it. "Come into the living room, the guests have already arrived."

You follow her into the living room, and you greet the guests. You and Ten have been together for a few years, so you know all of the family and friends who are used to being invited every year. "Ah, the lovers have arrived!" his father says, and you nod. You put the gifts you brought in your bag at the foot of the three, and you smile. You had a great time looking for the perfect gifts.

Immediately, you are taken aside by Ten's sister who is surprised to see you here. She is the only one in this room, besides Ten himself, who knows about your situation. Because yes, maybe you were drunk one night and called her, crying to complain about the ordeal your life had been like since breaking up with Ten. Tern is younger, but she is quite scary, so you hardly swallow your saliva when she comes face to face with you.

"What is this mess?" she asks in a whisper. "Did you get back together?" you worry your lower lip, giving Ten a furtive glance, he seems to be in the middle of a heated discussion with his father, and you shake your head. "Ten didn't say anything to your parents, so he asked me to come over, so as not to break the holiday spirit." you mumble, and if the Lee family was not there, you know Tern would go and slap her brother right away.

"You both are idiots." Tern says, and you shoulders slup. "Are you masochistic or what? Do you like hurting yourself?" you do not know what to say, you are just here to help Ten. "I know it's not the right thing to do, but it's Christmas Eve, so I'm going to pretend it's okay, smile, laugh, and be happy beofre I go back everyday life without Ten."

Tern sighs, tilting her head. "Is that what you want?" she asks before resuming. "Go back to a life without Ten? Because a person who has no more feelings would never agree to help their ex." That's the question, you don't know how you feel, your head is empty and your heart is a mess, it's been like this since Ten left. So you shrug. "I don't know Tern."

As you are about to speak, you are called out by Ten's mother who beckons you to approach. "Come help me in the kitchen for a minute, please." you nod, apologizing to Tern before joining her. There's nothing more to do, so you frown. "It's the only way to have some time with you without Ten jumping on you." she explains, and you can't help but laugh. "He learned to behave in public, don't worry."

"Is everything okay?" Ten's mother asks, and you nod. She looks worried, and for a second, you feel ready to tell her everything, but you can't, you promised Ten, and as he said himself, he doesn't want to hurt her, and neither do you. Not tonight anyway. "I'm asking because it's been a while since we've last seen you."

You nod. It's true that before, you used to visit the Lee family a couple of times each month, even though Ten was busy at work, and even more during the month of December, used to help Mrs. Lee prepare Christmas Eve. But being convinced that Ten had warned his parents, you did not do it anymore, you found it inappropriate.

"I was overwhelmed with work, I'm so sorry. But it's true that I should at least give given you a call." you explain in a weak voice, and the older woman shakes her head, placing a hand on your shoulder. "You have a job, you have a life, you have you own family, so you don't have to apologize for not having time. I get it, I was your age once."

You blame yourself more and more for the pain you are going to cause her, but you bite the inside of your cheek. Sometimes things don't go as planned, and you have to adapt. "And with Ten, is everything going well?" the question you would have liked to avoid. But you smile. "Everything is not perfect every day, but we both make an effort, because our relationship deserves it." Ten's mother smiles, she is proud to hear that her son has matured enough to do whatever it takes to keep his relationship healthy, and going.

"Don't hesitate to tell me if he crosses the line, then I'll give him a piece of my mind, believe me!" you laugh softly. You know that Mrs. Lee is, and will always be, there to help you. At least for now. But you need to stop thinking about the future, and focus on the present. You need to enjoy this last night you have with your surrogate family. "Thank you Ms. Lee, I appreciate that."

When she offers to return to the living room so as not to worry the guests, you follow her. Ten is still talking with his father, but the conversation seems to have calmed down, and you are happy. You know that the two men are used to arguing, and you have witnessed some rather disturbing scenes already, and you do not want that to happen again. You do not want to have to pick up Ten again.

"Everything okay?" you jump when Ten comes up behind you, and you turn to him. His cheeks are flushed, and you pursue your lips to stifle a laugh. "Don't tell me, your grandmother's friend?" he shakes his head with a poud, he doesn't like it when old little ladies pull his cheeks, it hurts. "My poor child. Maybe she'll stop someday."

"When she is in a coffin, yeah." Ten mumbles, and you put your hand over your mouth. "Don't say such things, Tennie!" you giggle and he smiles. He likes to be the reason for your laughter. "But to answer your question, yes, everything is fine. Your sister was a little surprised to see me here, but outside of that, like clockwork!"

Ten nods, and takes a sip from his glass of wine. He looks around him. The three, the decorations, his family, their friends, and you, and for a minute, he completely forgets that things are not the same as last year. Nothing is as before, everything is only an act. And when he turns his head towards you, and sees the lights of the tree reflected in your eyes, he thinks to himself that maybe, it was not a good idea.

See, you and Ten had a long relationship. You are his first love, and he always hoped that you would be his last. And to be honest, he still hopes so. But he knows that despite everything that has happened, all the insults you have exchanged, it would take very little time for him to fall in love again. No, he wouldn't need time at all, he is still in love, he always will be, he knows it deep down inside of him. And seeing you here, acting as your girlfriend, knowing that you'll probably never will be again, hurts like a bitch.

You think the same, and it hurts you too, but you both have too much pride to say it.

You then meet around the table, enjoying a fabulous feast prepared by Mrs. Lee. That's what you'll missed the most, the food. Ten is next to you, and every now and then, he leans in to whisper a joke in your ear. It's a tradition that you have, you try to make the other laugh, and get all eyes on yourself, knowing that it will be too inappropriate for you to say the joke out loud. At least some things are not changing.

You honestly can't remember the last time you had such a good time with Ten without it ending in an argument. What you do not notice is Tern's gaze. She watches you both, frowning. She can read between the lines. She knows that you still love each other, but are also too stupid to admit it.

The meal stretches over two hours, and when you finish, a full stomach, and ready to explode, it's time to open the presents. You get up from your chair and collect the packages. You give one to Ten's parents, one to Tern, and the last one, you hand it to Ten who titls his head. "You didn't have to, you know." he says in a whisper, and you shrug. "I know, but I got it before.. well before you know what."

Ten also gives you a present, and you arch an eyebrow at him. "I didn't want to see you pout thinking I forgot about you." he mumbles, and you smile. You open the present, and sigh. Inside is your favorite book, but not just any, the very first edition. It's old, rare, and probably extremely expensive. "Ten.." you whisper, and the boy smiles. "I know you've always dreamed of it."

What makes your heart beat a little faster is not that he gave you the book, but that he remembered it, because you only mentioned it once almost two years ago. Perhaps accusing him of never paying attention was wrong, now that you think about it. "Thank you so much Ten, you have no idea how happy this makes me." you lean over, and place a tender kiss on his cheek. And when you take a step back, you notice the rosy tint on Ten's cheeks. Cute.

"Come on, open yours!" Ten nods a minute later, the poor man needs to recover from the sudden physical contact first, then, he unwraps his present. If there is ont think Ten loves more than himself, and you, it's his watch. His father gave him his own watch for his 18th birthday, and it quickly became his most precious item, and unfortunately, he broke it a few months ago.

He thought it was irreparable, but nothing is ever irreparable, so you grabbed it one morning, and sent it over to have it fixed. It's not much for you, but when you see the tears in Ten's eyes, you knows that it was a perfect idea. "I thought I lost it." he says under his breath, and you shake your head. "I took it from you, wanted to surprise you, but I didn't expect it to take that long. I'm really sorry if I worried you."

Ten shakes his head, and he wipes his tears with his free hand, before a smile spreads over his beautiful face. "This deserves a kiss!" Ten's mother exclaims, and you hear Tern sigh loudly. "Mom, don't embarrass them." you are grateful for Ten, but you have to do it. So once more you take a step forward, and you cup Ten's face, and your face meet in the middle for a long, and soft kiss. Yeah, maybe you wanted to kiss him too. And for a while now.

"How beautiful young love is!" one person comments, and you smile weakly. Ten does the same, and you help him put the watch around his wrist. "Thank you, thank you. I don't think I will ever have enough words to thank you. It's the most perfect present." he says in a long sigh, and you smile. "I knew how much you cared about this watch." you run your fingers through Ten's hair to pull it out of his face, and realize how easy it is for you to fall back on your old habits.

The rest of the evening goes well.

You sit on the couch with Ten, and you listen to the stories the family members are telling, laughing every now and then, but you can't really focus with the heat radiating from Ten's body. Proximity in your hands. It would be so easy to take his hand, or rest your head on his shoulder.

Why the hell not, you think, it's Christmas, and you are supposed to be acting, so might as well make the most of it. You rest your head on Ten's shoulder, and if he is suprised, he doesn't show it, he lands a kiss on the top of your head. You feel his shoulders relax and you smile. You always have the same calming effect on each other. True love, but you refuse to think about it.

It's getting late, and you can't seem to suppress a long yawn, Ten notices. He stands up and you pout at the sudden lack of contact, and you sit up. "We're going to go mom, we still have a way to go, and it's snowing again." she nods, albeit a little sad, but she knows it would be too dangerous for Ten to drive if he is tired, of if there is too much snow.

"Thank you for coming, my loves, it made me very happy." once again, you find yourself engulfed in a long her that you give back with pleasure. And you thank her and Ten's father again and again for the invitation. And in a few minutes, you find yourself in front of the car. Tern follows closely behind you, and before Ten gets into the car, she puts her hand on his shoulder to take him aside. "Take care of yourself, and your heart, okay?"

Ten nods. "Don't worry, I know what to do to keep my heart safe." he looks at you to see if you heard him, but no, you are half asleep on the seat, and you would not even hear if a bomb were to explode near your ear. "Really, don't worry." he places a kiss on his sister's cheek, and he gets into the car after making sur the passenger door is closed. You collapsed into the seat, your new book clutched to your chest.

"It was a very good evening. You family is amazing." you say, and Ten can only agree. "You are right. Thank you for coming." you smile and lean your head against the window. You do not want to fall asleep, you want to enjoy your last moments with Ten, but unfortunately, fatigue quickly gets the better of you, and when you open your eyes, the car is already parked in front of your apartment complex.

"Thanks for taking me home, and thanks again for the book." you lean in to kiss the corner of his lips, but before Ten can say anything, you get out of the car. He opens the window, and you turns to him. "Have a good night, Ten." his fingers tighten around the steering wheel, and you see that he wants to say something, but he holds back. "Good night Y/n, and merry Christmas."

You walk towards the door that leads to the lobby, but the sound of the door opening and closing catches your attention. You turn around and find Ten in front of the car. You embrace your body with your arms to fight against the cold. "What are you doing, Ten?" you ask, and the boy finally approaches. He's so close you can feel his breath against your lips. "Would you like to go have coffee tomorrow? And maybe we can go check out the Christmas lights."

You smile, and you nod. "I would love this, Ten." his smile is as bright as the moon, and you chuckle softly when he places a small kiss on your lips before heading back to his car, not without a victory move that almost makes him trip in the snow.

It’s Christmas Eve. It’s the one night of the year when we all act a little nicer, we smile a little easier, we cheer a little more. For a couple of hours out of the whole year, we are the people that we always hoped we would be.

And maybe sometimes, you can decide to stay that kind of people.

[sage-nebula]

For those wondering, these are the topics I was going to send my university's official tumblr anon hate for:

1.) The fact that they charged hundreds of dollars per year for parking passes but there was never enough room on campus to park since they frequently destroyed parking lots to build new buildings.

2.) The fact that the campus was only three streets big but they bought public safety yet ANOTHER brand new SUV that was just used so they (public safety) could drive up to McDonalds (which was literally one street over from campus)

3.) The fact that adjunct faculty and staff members were WAAAY underpaid (I was being paid $15k UNDER what the national average for my position was, and I worked there nine years only one 3% increase in the entire nine years)

4.) Despite this, the administration (and in particular the provost and president) routinely got yearly bonuses of around $10mil

5.) When the student paper called them out on this in a forum meeting, the administration responded by slashing the school of communications budget by 1/3rd so the paper had to let a lot of the staff go

6.) The school spent $1mil to buy the president a second house in the area so she could host parties there

7.) The school claimed to be inclusive yet wouldn't let a trans student change his username and email address because he didn't have a legal name change on file. Meanwhile a faculty member was able to have his email address changed to a nickname without having a legal name change on file either

8.) When we had a student employee sexually harassing another student employee and reported it to the Title IX coordinator (the student himself reported it, and we, as his supervisors, also reported it) we were told that the Title IX coordinator was "looking into it" and then we got ignored. The student graduated with nothing having been done for him.

9.) Despite spending millions on houses for the president and bonuses for the president and provost etc, the students still had things like tiny desks that no one could comfortably sit in and elevators that routinely broke in the main hall because there "wasn't enough money in the budget" to fix them

10.) This is something I just heard about so I'm not sure if it's true or not, but allegedly when one of the chess team members came out, he was made to resign from the chess team, although they still let him keep his scholarship (which included free room + board) so long as he didn't report them for it. Again I don't know if it's true or not, but considering how they handled other queer issues (see point 7 above, I was personally involved in everything in point 7 because I was working at the IT Service Desk and yes, I fought as hard as I could for that student but just got shut down because "policy says a legal name change is required" and even when I pointed out that was bullshit because of the aforementioned asshole faculty member I was ignored), it wouldn't surprise me

11.) Although we at the IT Service Desk had received threats of violence against us on multiple occasions (often with firearm related threats), the higher-ups in the IT department were still pushing to have the IT Service Desk accessible by the public and when I pushed against this because of the aforementioned threats, I got told "you can't protect the students forever, they have to grow up sometime"

There are probably more reasons I wanted to send them anon hate but honestly these are the ones off the top of my head. The student employees I worked with were (mostly) great, the people on my team were great, but man, the school administration was corrupt as fuck and I hated the higher-level IT employees because of how little regard they held for the students and their safety and enjoyment of the job. But again, the official university tumblr had the ask box shut off and tbh it's probably for the best because it was probably some poor student worker handling it anyway, but still. I hated that place so much. So glad I don't work there anymore.