#anyway my favourite writing game is 'show that the POV character is fucked up in ways they do not understand or acknowledge'

[laundrybiscuits]

(soulmates AU: Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4)

When Eddie Munson was almost fifteen, his soulmark showed up overnight.

Oh fuck oh god oh fuck oh god he’d thought in a loop, horrified eyes stuck on a wrist thrust as far away from himself as his gangly limbs could manage. 

All year, the hope had been growing and growing in him that he’d dodged a bullet. Turns out it was just a little slow.

Because, see, when Eddie Munson was almost eight, he asked his mom why can’t we just go away somewhere, like—like, just us, and Sarah Munson kissed his head and said your daddy’s my soulmate, baby. It’s gonna be okay.

And then because he was a little shit who routinely broke his mom’s heart, he tore himself out of her arms and yelled if you loved me he wouldn’t be your soulmate, which didn’t even make sense to himself at any point, he’d just been hopping mad with nowhere to put it except a woman who had only ever done her best to love him. 

He didn’t blame her at all when he got sent to live with Wayne, pretty soon after that. Not, like, the next morning or even the next month, but close enough that when he got told he was going, it all sort of made sense in his eight-year-old mind. It all connected.

When his fourteenth birthday came and went without the heavy hand of destiny landing on his wrist, he’d slowly started to relax. He’d gotten all wound up worrying about it, the whole year he was twelve, concocting increasingly elaborate scenarios in his mind: a popular girl who would sneer resentfully at him for the rest of their lives, or maybe some bizarro girl version of Eddie who would hate him even more.

Sometimes, guiltily, he’d wondered what would happen if it wasn’t a girl’s name at all. He’d never even heard of anything like that happening, but he’d been starting to get the feeling that if there was ever going to be a freak of nature like that, it just might be him. 

As much as the thought of getting chained to a girl for life was starting to make him feel like running and hiding and clawing off all his skin, the thought of getting a name that wasn’t a girl’s name—that would be so much worse. Sure, he couldn’t picture any girl who’d be pleased to have his name on her, but some guy who had to bear Eddie’s chicken-scratch scrawled across his wrist like the mark of Cain? He’s pretty sure people have gotten put in the ground for less. The week before he turned thirteen, he had three nightmares in a row about it. 

Maybe it should’ve been some kind of relief to see SANDY FOWLER, who could be a girl but honestly probably wasn’t, someone he hadn't even ever met and couldn’t guess anything about. A reprieve from having to know for sure either way: as close to a blank canvas as anyone like him could get. A million-to-one shot. Instead, he'd just felt the fear in his gut curdle and turn to a cold kind of fury.

Fuck this, he’d thought, and reached for the beat-up Bic on his bedside table.

———

People get real weird about it, especially once he gets it covered up all the way instead of just stabbing ink into his skin any which way, driven by nauseous determination to fuck it up any way he could. 

When Wayne had come home that day and seen Eddie on the bathroom floor, covered in blood and ink and the snotty tears he couldn’t hold back after a while, he'd yelled at Eddie for the first time in Eddie’s life. 

He hadn't kicked Eddie out afterwards, though Eddie’d still slept with his backpack tucked under his bed for weeks, just in case. Instead, Wayne had asked around awkwardly, and one of his old trucking buddies had known a guy called Frank out in Ohio who ran a side business for desperate folks. 

Frank had made some kind of face when he saw what Eddie had done; nodded at Wayne and said, "You did good bringing him here."

Wayne had just nodded back in that taciturn way he got around strangers sometimes, and helped Eddie up into the chair. 

He'd gone back one more time when he was eighteen, just to get it patched up and smoothed out again. Frank hadn't recognized him at first with his fresh new metalhead look and the way he'd been shooting up like a weed. They'd joked about covering his whole arm eventually, and Eddie thought maybe it wouldn't even be a joke in another few years. He's not in a rush. He feels a kind of vicious, candy-sweet relief when he looks at his arm now, so everything else is just a bonus. 

But yeah, people do get real weird about it. He’s pretty sure some of them think he never had any kind of name under there, that he’s just a poser who wants to act all badass like he’s rejecting something he never had, but the joke’s on them because Eddie really fucking wishes that were the case. The ones who do think he has a name probably think it’s covered in Sharpie or something, like Eddie gets up early every single morning to reapply the felt-tip for shock value. 

It’s not a huge shock when Steve Harrington gets a little squeamish about the whole thing. It’s maybe a little surprising that Steve hasn’t heard the rumors about it already, but he guesses they’ve moved in pretty different circles. 

Every time they’re in the same room now, Eddie’s got a mental timer ticking away until Steve’s eyes drop down to his wrist. He’s pretty sure Steve doesn’t even know it’s happening, most of the time. 

Of course he knows about the Nancy Wheeler thing. Everyone fucking knows about the Nancy Wheeler thing. Steve hadn’t been shy about it at any point; it’s not all that common to meet your soulmate real young, so it had been pretty big news in the halls of Hawkins High. It was bigger news when Wheeler dumped him very publicly and, it seemed, very permanently. 

Eddie hadn’t cared so much until that point. Sure, it was a little unusual, but who gave a rat’s ass? You could see that kind of thing in any insipidly brainless rom-com you liked. The break-up, though. He’d never have guessed that Wheeler had the big brass balls to pull that kind of thing. And shacking up with creepy weirdo Jonathan Byers like that—there had to be some real juicy story there. He’d even heard some of the adults around Hawkins talking about it, like it was actual news or something. 

The whole thing makes a lot more sense when Nancy finally gets around to telling him about it. He’s kind of a captive audience at first, just blearily nodding along as she perches on the chair by his hospital bed and nervously, haltingly fills the silence when he’s too hazy to contribute much to the conversation. 

She ends up telling him a lot of stuff that he’s not a hundred percent sure she meant to say, or at least he’s not a hundred percent sure she meant to say it to someone who’d actually hear her.

“I liked him,” she says. “I did. I’m positive. I wasn’t being forced into it, or anything like that. I liked him so much. I wasn’t…I wasn’t lying when I said I loved him.”

Eddie’s only mostly awake at that point, but he sees her press the heel of her palm into her eyes and take a deep breath. “I wasn’t lying. Not on purpose. God, I don’t know. Maybe I was lying. I didn’t think I was when I said it, anyway, and that’s—that must count for something, right?” 

She laughs a little. “You’re not even awake, and I’m having a complete breakdown at you.”

With a truly herculean effort, Eddie rouses himself to make some kind of acknowledging noise. 

She flinches a little in her chair, so she really must’ve thought he was out. “Oh! Eddie, um—are you okay? Do you need anything?” 

“S’okay,” he manages. “You can—keep talking. If you want.”

Nancy pauses and looks at him, pursing her mouth in that prissy, thoughtful way. “Okay,” she says at last. “I will.”

[shares-a-vest]

🪱 🧠 Wiggly Wed-ursday 🧠 🪱

Let's just pretend timezones aren't real for a second and that it's still Wednesday for me. @kikidoesfanfic tagged me in this wonderful tag game weeks ago and I only remember when I see everyone else's on a Thursday my time. Also thank you to @penny00dreadful for the tag today which made me decide to finally do it!

I spend a stupid amount of time thinking about Steve's parents. So much so, that I have a fic in the pipeline that is from Steve's Mom's POV and lmao, my brain already wants to write a semi-sequel/companion piece (I swear to fucking christ I am determined to publish this fic this weekend – I am so sorry to all the people I have basically strung along with this long-gestating wip). We get like four sentences about Steve's parents the entire show ("she's super well-respected", "my dad's an asshole"). And while I guess you could argue that Steve's background isn't all that crucial in the show, he still grew into this fan-favourite character that ended up gaining more screen time than initially planned but... We still get nothing??? Steve's parents not getting a mention in extended material bugs me too (whyyy aren't they in that play!!!). Anyway, enough screaming and onto some brainworms. I am plagued by thoughts of Steve's Dad's POV – Somewhere between an outsider's POV and a character study. Does he notice when his son disappears for days at a time? Right on Spring Break when this young girl has been 'murdered'? Is he like the Wheeler's, watching the local news? Do he and Steve's Mom go to the town meeting? Maybe they sit at the back. Do they know who Claudia is? Maybe she awkwardly greets them, only to be left cold. She thinks they should be as concerned as she and Karen are. If their kids are involved in all of this somehow, Steve would be with them too. How about when the town splits in two? Steve's car must be gone from the house too, right? (Honestly, I lost track of everyone's vehicles in s4. steve changes into The Yellow Sweater, so he must have gone home). Do his parents know the Buckley's number? Surely they know of Robin. Do they go looking for him? What happens when they find him and his friends? Do they ask what the hell happened? What does he tell them?

Some general/possible fic ideas I have with all of this worminess:

Steve's POV, His Mom's POV, His Dad's POV all in the one event. Maybe it's Christmas or just some fancy party they are having. Maybe even the aftermath of some event/family drama.

Mr Harrington's POV of Season 4.

Steve's Parents meeting Robin for the first time. Somewhere between seasons 3 and 4. Robin's POV of this too.

Claudia's POV of Steve's parents.

I think I'll leave it there. Consider the end of this post me walking off into the sunset for the day, ramble-asking endless questions about Steve's parents.

No-pressure tags: @momotonescreaming @puppy-steve @sidekickjoey @tangerinesteve

@hellion-child @devondespresso

[forabeatofadrum]

🌈💝🍭

🌈is there a fic that you worked *really fucking hard on* that no one would ever know? maybe a scene/theme you struggled with?

See here!

I mean, I'd like to think I work hard on all my stuff, not only Call Me Maybe, but I also feel appreciated, ya know? I don't think people don't notice, apart from what I mentioned about Call Me Maybe.

💝what is a fic that got a different response than you were expecting?

Probably Ebb & Flow. As the host of the 321 Prompt Bang you've probably seen my many, many breakdowns over that fic. And as a result, once it was out in the world, I had a "thank fuck it's over" moment and because I may or may not have projected my insecure feelings on that, I was shook that people actually liked it. I mean, Beth, you know that this fic was weird for me, and you know that I also kind of hate to bash it, since I wasn't the only one who made it. You were the original prompter! But as usual, I wanna reiterate that I love your prompt and I love Judas's art, but man the writing. But yeah, I also say that Ebb & Flow also shows how much positive feedback like comments and kudos work. I always say that the fandom really lifted this one up for me. Heck, I actually reread parts of it yesterday and I had an another "you know what, this is fine" moment. It will probably never be my favourite fic and a part of me will always go "ah, yes, that happened, huh?", but it has some good stuff and I'm glad people showed me that.

(On a smaller tangent, I do get a lot of joy when I play Splatoon 3 and I keep thinking about the Ebb & Flow world while doing so. The other day I got absolutely KO'd by a Lunar Blaster and all I could think of was "alright, okay, this is why I let Blaine main that one".)

🍭why did you start writing?

Fic writing? "Officially" around 2013. Cory was still alive. Weird to say, I know, but that's how I remember it was 2013. I wrote all of Just The Way You Look Tonight in one day on a campsite during summer. But even before that I technically wrote fic without knowing what fic was. I once rewrote all of Harry Potter from Ginny's POV. I borrowed all the books from the library so that I could match it perfectly. That's fanfiction. And before that, I always had so many ideas for Winx Club stories in my head.

And I now see that I misread the question. I thought it said "when did you start writing" BUT ANYWAY this answer still sort of tracks: I just loved playing around with other people's characters and worlds. I wanted to expand on it. My mind was filled with all of the things I wanted to see. I did write original stuff when I was a kid. I probably still have a notebook with my original stuff somewhere, because I am oldschool and grew up in the 2000s and wrote everything on paper. And same can be said here. These characters were my own, but I just liked having a creative outlet. I love making stories, even for non-writing. Look at my good ole 10 generation long family on the Sims 4. Or now with Stardew Valley, I get so lost in making a farmer OC (Lune and Abby just got a second child and I am over the moon!) up to the point that I want to buy another copy of this game so that I can make 5 more!

[puredramione]

My 2020 Reading List - Dramione

This year, I’ve read way more dramione than I’ve ever read, and I’ve been reading it for 7 years now. I even read things, tropes, I had never bothered with before. 2020 may not have been a kind year, but in the dramione community it has been a wonderful year of reading for me. Please be aware I may spoil some plot lines to dramione fanfictions you haven’t read yet. I have tried not to as best as I can. But anyway below is 20 fics I’ve read this year that have been there for me when I needed them. No particular order. Just a lot of love for these fics.

Wait and Hope - by @mightbewriting - memory loss is one of my favourite tropes but this story. I have never cried over a couch before. But this story. From the moment she first awakes in St Mungo’s to that beautiful ending, I was hooked. I loved how the story left me with not really a care about whether or not Hermione got her memories back. Those bloody text messages 💔 a journey I’ll never forget.

The Unofficial Diary of an Omega - MrsRen - my first time reading anything omegaverse. It still isn’t my favourite trope. I much prefer Veela for some reason 🤷🏻‍♀️ but overall it was a good story, just not my thing.

Apple Pies and Other Amends by ToEatAPeach - I actually gave up on this story the first time I read it. Unsure as to why because the story as a whole is just amazing. Baking and dramione? Yes please! Also dealing with their psychological trauma after the war? Heck yes! The relationship in this story develops at a lovely pace. There were moments I was on edge, others I was smiling ear to ear whilst reading this. Definitely one of my favourites now.

In Search Of Sunrise - @indreamsink - actually just reread this and I still get that warm feeling in my chest. So turns out my break up hasn’t made me lose the ability to enjoy dramione falling for each other. Anyway, the story was so heartwarming, like if I were to describe it as anything I would describe it as a hug. The best non-date fic there is.

Sex and Occlumency - Graendoll - this was the start of my slippery slope into reading smut stories. Like I had read smut before, obviously but I didn’t pay it much attention, normally just swiped past 😂 but this one was a completely different story.

Manacled - @senlinyu - this is truly the most beautifully haunting story I’ve ever read. I remember when I first started reading it, I thought to myself, how the hell could I ever ship dramione in this world? Then those flashbacks. Fuck those flashback chapters were a punch in the gut. The way everything links and connects. I love it’s realistic ending. I often think of this story in the shower cause I had to force myself to go shower whilst I read this cause I honestly couldn’t put it down. And SPOILER, but I laughed so hard at a certain characters death even though I probably shouldn’t have but she was such a bitch. I get flashbacks myself of this story. I’ll be in the shower and I’ll remember a certain sentence, a certain scene in my head as if I truly walked with Hermione on this heart wrenching journey. But fuck manacled Harry, I hate that boy.

He Becomes by @abromaposts - I needed this story. This was the first thing I read after Manacled. Draco Malfoy looking after rabbits with the sole reason being to get close to Hermione, yes please. Rabbits are my favourite animals. It’s just so much fluff. And after Manacled I was grateful.

The Right Thing To Do - @lovesbitca8 - this was the bookshop, slow burn, fluffiness I needed in the summer. The start of a truly wonderful universe. Idiots in love, I’ve never went through so much second hand embarrassment. Every interaction between Hermione and Lucius was fantastic. Especially the final one! Every character was written to a way that I loved them so much. Plus this story makes you think (like the rest of the series) it doesn’t spoon fed you information.

All The Wrong Things - @lovesbitca8 - I never thought I’d be into first person POV. The last thing I read like that was The Hunger Games back in school, many years ago. But I truly felt as if Draco were telling me the story. I love how it filled in things we never seen in the first story. I love Draco’s characterisation. Unlike TRTTD, this feels more lighthearted. Could just be the horny Draco though and his dramatics?

The Auction - @lovesbitca8 - this story. where do I start? When I started reading this story I was in a completely different life. This story has seen me through a terrible time in my life. Honestly the last few chapters before the final chapter were a blur and I had to go and reread them cause my head was all over the place but the story. This story, on it’s own, I would say is better than any fiction I’ve ever read 🤷🏻‍♀️ it grips you, pulls you in. Every question you ask, you get answered with a ribbon and bow. I cannot express my love, for this story and for the hard work that has went into it. The characters in this world so vastly different yet similar to the ones we already learned to love. I could write a love letter to this story.

Hindsight by @floorcoaster - if you haven’t been following this year long, monthly updated story, then you’ve really missed out. Each chapter is a month of the year. The story starts with Hermione planning to trim down her calendar for the year ahead. Although it’s fiction it gave me a sense of hope for my future. I had started this year on a different note than Hermione, and I’m now ending it on a different note as well. I think this story does a good job of capturing the passage of time and just how quickly things can change. I also really love these adorable idiots in this story.

Bring Him To His Knees by @willhavetheirtrinkets (WIP) - the best co-worker, friends to lovers, fake relationship story I’ve read. No question. I sent @magicaltraveler3 a tearful voice memo after that last chapter that was posted (chapter 20). It isn’t the first time I’ve cried at a fanfic, but it is the first time that I predicted something bad would happen, but I didn’t expect the bad thing to be what it was. I can’t wait to see where this story goes. At this point I have completely forgot about the murder plot. I know it exists, and we’ll get back to the murder but I’d honestly read the characters in this story eating breakfast.

The Flat In Bath by @adaprix (WIP) - this was the first story I got into that ada has wrote. Instantly I was fascinated with the use of “flat” over “apartment”. Being Scottish I knew this was someone British. Anyway, a very interesting story and I can’t wait to see how the rest of it plays out.

Good by @lovesbitca8 - I am dying for the update of this story. As so many are, it is 🔥🔥🔥 all I can say. I can’t wait for the update!

The Erised Effect by @adaprix - When ada first told me she was thinking about writing a story about Pansy and Hermione working in a sex shop together. Telling me about having the idea of them meeting in the pub and how she “needed to get some filthy smut out of your system”. I didn’t think it would be my thing. Boy, did she prove me wrong!

The Cell by WrathOfMacy - I don’t know how I came to read this one. But damn, this was a good one (who am I kidding they’re all good ones). I’m still reading through it though. It’s a warfic in which Dramione end up locked in a cell together. The relationship builds nicely. I cannot wait to read more of it.

The Melody Of Touch by @magicaltraveler3 - I never knew I needed a dramione story like this story. I love that there is so much musical imagery incorporated into it. I haven’t read anything like it before. The story, the smut, the taxi and the freaking art work. It is everything!

Every Day, a Little Death by @lovesbitca8 - I’ll be honest with this one. I read the first chapter and the last chapter 🙈 BUT only cause everyone scared me so much. I plan to revisit. SPOILER. I may not care too much that Hermione cheated. Just me? Like yeah I hate cheating and she shouldn’t have done it, but like she admitted to it, and was very regretful for it. Anyway, the chapters I read were very interesting I look forward to revisiting it sometime.

Away by @indreamsink - written for the romcom fest and I got to say I think this one may be my favourite from the fest. Not only do you get dramione but you get the amazing side pairing of Harry/Pansy, which this year has really became my favourite side pairing. It’s like reading two love stories at once, I was interested in the dramione plot line obviously, but I was equally interested in the hansy/potts&pans plot line.

The Path Unexpected by @magicaltraveler3 - this story is a cute little domestic dramione fanfic. And I lived for it. It shows dramione going through the process of having a child and honestly, they’re so damn cute in this fic. The fanart is next level also!

[pridewhatpride]

omg pls talk more about GX rival shipping once the transfer students come

Dear anon, I love you for asking this of me, but I have to wonder if you want everyone who follows me to start hating me.

Long post coming up? You know it. I apologise to all Johan fans, he's great and I loved him and his deck as a child. Now I'm just salty because he's too perfect. Warning because this is a mess of unrequited feelings and it's an all around bad time if you ship anything in gx. I did mention I do not practice self care in a previous post of mine. Enjoy your pain c:

So here are my bad takes of the day, under the very handy cut!

You see, gx rivalshipping becomes a lot more complicated and angsty when the transfer students arrive. The dynamic changes. If there is a dynamic at all. I mean, imagine yourself in Manjoume's shoes. You've lowkey had a crush on this dumb guy who kind of ruined your life (but actually improved it and freed you from the restraints your family imposed on you), just to watch a handsome scandinavian dude who is a lot more muscular than you are and maybe a little bit nicer, maybe just waltz in and completely captivate said dumb guy's attention. Just when you had managed to admit your own feelings to yourself.

Johan comes in and steals the room, everybody loves him, he's good looking, charismatic, kind and has a magical exclusive shiny sparkling deck at his disposal that he uses as if it was the most natural thing in the world, like he hadn't received approval Pegasus himself on top of the duel spirits. And Judai clearly can't get enough of it, because he's always seeking him out, ever since the duel they had in front of everyone, and Manjoume finds that he's really annoyed by it. He wishes he'd been chosen for the demonstration, deluding himself into believing that if he'd won, Judai would have never started caring so damn much about Johan. But a part of him knows he would have probably lost and that even if he hadn't, Judai would have not cared about the outcome at all. It's nice to think that winning a card game can solve all your problems, but, while Manjoume has only ever experienced how much losing one can mess with your life goals, he isn't stupid enough to think that winning would grant him happiness. Not anymore. No well-thought-out strategy can rid him of his bad temper and his worthless pride.

The thing is, he can't really hate Johan, because nobody can hate Johan. He's just the perfect picture of everything Manjoume isn't and, going by everyone's reaction, the fact that 'everyone is unique in their own way and worthy of love' is absolute bullshit. There clearly is an objective better one of the two and Manjoume is very aware that he isn't it. And he'd probably begrundgingly be cool with it, after all he'd accepted that Jaden was braver than him, that Asuka was emotionally stronger and more resolute, that Daichi was smarter, not to mention how much plain better than him his fomer upperclassmen were. Forget about pros like Edo, whom Judai had stood on equal grounds with. But Judai is clearly playing favourites, too, hell, he hardly even acknowledges Manjoume.

He finds himself forcibly removed from his already shaky position as rival, because now Johan is there to take it up, on top of the titles of 'best friend' and 'emotional support and crutch' and 'maybe something else I'd really rather not know'.

Manjoume just generally hates it all. He might have changed and improved himself, but there is no saving him from the fact that some people were just better. That doesn't stop him from trying. But again he finds himself pitted against Judai, the irony of his fate never giving him a moment to rest. Manipulated and turned into the enemy of those he cares about, again.

A part of him despises how good it feels to learn that Johan has gone missing, but Judai is screaming like his arms have been torn off and while he hates that it's all for Johan, he hates that Judai is in pain even more. Judai had saved him before and it's only right for him to return the favour. So he insists on helping him on his stupidly risky plan to save Johan. And it's all to get the old Judai back.

...The rest, from Manjoume's perspective is a mess. His feelings of anger stem from the hatred he harbours towards himself and the bond between Judai and Johan. He'd been trying to help, he had, he sincerely had, but everything just swirled together and the next thing he knows is that he is shouting at Judai because it suddenly made sense to guilt trip him over the fact that he'd abandoned his friends, he'd abandoned him as soon as someone better had come into the picture. And it was Judai's fault for letting them- him believe that he cared when he didn't, when he couldn't have cared less, because clearly he had one priority only and that was Johan. They had come to help and it still wasn't being appreciated.

Disappearing is a relief, for a moment, but then he finds himself in another hellish place and he can't help but think that it's retribution for being so upset over something that has nothing to do with him. That's right. It's his own fault for making Judai, his only real friend (aside from Fubuki, sorry for breaking the immersion, but I love Fubuki), carry the burden of the stupid hopes that came with his feelings. Judai has no fault. Johan has no fault. It's his own for desiring something that would always be out of reach.

As he is tortured by his own thoughts and regrets in the other dimension, Manjoume silently wishes his words meant nothing to Judai, that he'd be spared the pain of betrayal. He wishes Judai can achieve his goal.

When Shou appears to him, he knows there is no time to waste. If he is alive, the others are, too. Judai would want to know that they are safe. So he asks Shou to carry his message, along with his good luck wish. He hopes it's enough to make up for his mistakes.

Next thing he knows, they are back at DA, Judai is nowhere to be seen. Manjoume mourns the loss of his first and only friend and curses himself for tarnishing that memory. (Judai's return and season 4 would be too much to cover, this was only Manjoume's pov and I might as well just rewrite the entire show at this point.)

So what about Judai?

I personally want to believe that he genuinely does like Manjoume at some point. But as much as it pains me to admit it, season 3 just wrote Manjoume off from the list of main characters and relegated him to 'he's your funny comic relief, nobody really gives a shit about what he thinks or feels, so why should you, the spectator who has grown to love him, care at all? Also here's his sticker that confirms that Judai going after Johan makes him really angry for some reason, make of that what you will c:' (fuck the writing staff, I'm not even sorry).

Judai is so clearly smitten with Johan. It seems to me that his refusal to accept Manjoume's help that one time on the cliff shows that Judai doesn't really understand the way Jun operates. He probably labeled him as just someone else who counted on him to be saved. And sure, Manjoume is saved by Judai in multiple occasions, but he doesn't ever really... ask for it? Or more importantly expect it. He doesn't get himself into situations he can't handle because Judai can save him anyways, the trouble just kind of happens at him and more often than not he's only involved by accident, because he happens to be close to Judai.

The problem still stands, as season 3 starts, Judai is very much burdened by everyone's expectations and Johan is a breath of fresh air and the only one Judai actually considers a friend and an equal. It's heartbreaking that he felt that alone.

They get their gay 'have we met somewhere before moment', they duel gaily, they homoerotically tell eachother how admirable the other is, they shamelessly flirt and whoohoo Judai has an unofficial boyfriend and who can blame him for concentrating on him along with wanting to escape the pressure his former gang unknowingly laid on him.

But yeah, Judai in season 3 has a one track mind and it's hard not to see it as romantic. Does he know it is? Maybe? I honestly don't know. I feel like Johan is the one of the two who is aware of the implications of their interactions. Which also kind of brings me to say... does Johan think that all of Judai's friends are horrible people? Because he never once comments on how Judai distances himself from them once he arrives. He probably thinks they were never good friends in the first place.

Judai probably excuses his attentions towards Johan with the fact that they are alike because they can see spirits, but then he rememebers that so can Manjoume and maybe he feels guilty for a second, but Johan cracks a joke and Judai laughs and thinks to himself that Manjoume is probably happy to have the peace and quiet he so often claimed to want.

Like... I think a part of him would get that tightness in his chest because it's like he's betrayed someone, but he knows he hasn't, because there isn't any actual mutual agreement he's going against. So he lets himself fall deeper into the comfort of Johan's presence. Johan is, to Judai, the ideal person. He is exactly who Judai wants to become. Judai admires him very deeply and strives to be more like him, but he falls gradually into despair as he learns, once Johan is gone, that no, he can't be like him, because Johan is so much better than him, and if he doesn't get him back soon he might even forget what he was like in the first place. Johan can't be erased, can't be forgotten. And Judai feels like he's vanishing already, so he throws himself into a wild interdimensional manhunt to save his hopes for the future.

Turns out that wanting to do good doens't always result in a good outcome. That's what Judai learns when Manjoume lashes out at him just seconds before disappearing. Along with the others, too. Judai doesn't even have the brain power to compute that some people are still there, that he can still save someone, because he realised then that he had focused so much on Johan that he'd completely overlooked the fact that while his friends relied on him a little too much, they hadn't meant any harm. And if he'd just told them, maybe they would have been fine, they could've cooperated- but Manjoume had told him that he was a traitor, that he'd doomed them with his irrational behaviour.

Manjoume's last words to him had been spoken with hatred and Judai realised only then that he had misread him entirely. He lets despair and self hatred take over as he realises that if he had managed to hurt the ones he cared about so easily, discarding them for the new good thing, he could just keep doing that. And it would stop hurting, eventually.

I like to think that Manjoume really does have an impact on the awakening of the Supreme King. Yeah, I know he only turns once Johan's death is mentioned, I know. I just suffer from abandonment issues and can't stand that Manjoume dying in front of him is more impactful to Judai than a guy who literally can't be trusted saying "Joke's on you, the one you're looking for is in another castle already dead."

So yeah. That's the angsty overview.

TL;DR Johan is an Adonis, Judai is smitten and Manjoume is very very heartbroken. But actually so is Judai. Because while being with Johan feels right, there's someone whose absence feels wrong, but he doesn't allow himself to dwell on it and everything goes to shit. All around a bad time for everyone and they'll have a lot of talking to do once they properly reconcile after graduation.

[captain-aralias]

Trivia Tuesday!!! (The Sweet Fruit of a Palm Tree)

Creators: give a “behind the scenes” look at one of your works. This could be things that got removed or changed, the origins of ideas/details, whatever you like!

tagging some people who might want to share trivia: @sharkmartini @krisrix @annabellelux @llamapyjamas @sharing-a-room-with-an-open-fire​ @ninemagicks​ @milo-fanarts​ @carryonvisinata​ @f-ing-ruthless-baz​

(yes, i am on leave from work this week with nothing to do - why do you ask?) 

i have almost 2,000 words of cut scenes from my 3,000 word @goldendayszine zine fic - and those are only the scenes that I saved. there was also an ending from simon’s POV but i think it must have been very similar with different names because it’s not in any of the versions i emailed to people, or my cut scenes doc. 

i have never cut so much. 

some scenes and lines i cut for space; most i cut and re-wrote because they were ruining the mood. in almost all cases the fic is much better without them.

please enjoy if this is the sort of thing you enjoy. i think there are genuinely some interesting choices here! 

cut-cut-cut: 

original title was ‘The British Museum Job’ - which is objectively a better title, but the more the fic was about baz’s mother and how he wanted to date simon, and the less it was about a heist, the less that title fit. so i changed it.

--

in approximate chronological order. bits in bold made it into the original. italics are comments from me. 

--

Snow keeps yawning as I try and show him my favourite parts of London without explaining what I’m doing. He’s not even tired. (We slept in the same room again last night. I know he slept most of the night – I heard him snoring). I’ve already offered to buy him a coffee.  

“Thanks, but I still don’t trust you not to poison it,” he said. Which was hardly romantic.

We walked along Regent Street because I thought he might enjoy the lights. (He didn’t even look at them.) Down through Piccadilly Circus and up Shaftesbury Avenue. I thought about suggesting a show – it would have filled the time perfectly – but that really would have felt like a date. And anyway, he told me he hated musicals before I could buy the tickets.

“If you’re going to do something, you should just do it. Not just sing about it for five minutes.”

reason for cut: 

space. although it’s also unnecessary. 

--

I might even tell him I was kidnapped.

That I was alone underground for weeks. That thinking of him was the only thing that got me through it.

It could be our first really intimate moment.

But before I can do it (not that I was going to do it), Snow strides off. He’s actually weaving through the crowd in the direction of one of the exhibits, his expression purposeful – and I have to grab his hand and pull him back into me.

“What the fuck are you doing?”

Snow scowls at me, as though I’m the one being unreasonable. “There’s a vampire here.” I raise my eyebrow. He frowns. “I mean another one. Obviously.”

My gaze follows Snow’s pointing finger towards a man with long dark hair and a well-tailored winter coat. He’s with a brunette woman, leaning against her as they peer into a case of shabtis.

Even from several feet away, I can tell he’s human. They both are. He smells like coffee and steak; she smells like cream.

And next to me Simon Snow smells, as always, like the thing I want to eat most in the world, which at the moment seems to be a bacon sandwich warm enough to melt the butter.

I should have fed before trying to spend the evening with him. Or perhaps I shouldn’t be trying to spend the evening with him at all. I could have done this on my own.

“That’s not a vampire,” I tell Snow, trying to sound bored. “He just looks like me.”

“He was biting that woman’s neck,” Snow insists.

I roll my eyes. (It helps distract me from thinking about how much I’d like to bite his neck).  

“I think he was kissing her, Snow.”

Snow looks dubious. “On the neck?”

“For Crowley’s sake.”

We’ve barely started the Egyptian section, but I don’t want to be here anymore. In the place my mother brought me. Not now that both Snow and I are thinking about how (unlike the poor man Snow was about to assault) I actually am a vampire. One of the creatures who caused my mother’s death.

“Come on,” I say. “Let’s get out of here.”

Mercifully he follows me. He must believe I can identify vampires. Which I think I can, even though I’ve just never tried it before (I can definitely identify people who aren’t vampires). Although he’s still grumbling as we take the stairs back down to the ground floor.

“I don’t think that bloke did look like you.”

“Fine, Snow.”

“He wasn’t even that good looking.”

I don’t react. (Not visibly anyway.)

He says things like this sometimes. It doesn’t mean anything. Objectively, I am good looking and Snow isn’t blind. Of course he noticed. He noticed in the same bored, completely dispassionate way that I’ve noticed that his ex-girlfriend is good looking. She’s gorgeous. Objectively. It doesn’t mean I want to date her.

Snow turning up at my house for Christmas doesn’t mean he wants to spend more time with me.

And this isn’t a date.

But somehow – even though I know that absolutely that none of this means anything – it feels good to hear him give me a compliment. I want him to think I look good – it’s why I wore this suit in the first place. (Yes, all right – it’s for him, not the vampires. I know I’m delusional, but at least I look fucking incredible.)

A moment ago, I was ready to give up. I was ready to go and sit in a coffee shop or an alley somewhere and glare at Snow until I was sure the vampires were done feeding.

But now Snow’s lit another pathetic flame of hope inside me. This might not actually be a date, but I want it to be one.

reason for cut: 

space. but when i went back to re-write it, i also though the mood was wrong. this is quite an antagonistic scene between the two of them. it’s about how simon wants to get on with the job at hand (killing vampires) and it’s about how baz is a vampire, but in a way that baz quite rightly tells us makes him sad. nobody wants that!! so you see i kept simon complimenting baz, but made it into a much more straightforwardly lulzy compliment. i also do not have time to introduce random secondary characters who have no lines. they’re gone. 

--

here’s a slightly different version of the above: 

We’ve barely started the Egyptian section, but I don’t want to be here anymore. On this … whatever-it-is with Snow. I don’t want to be in the place my mother brought me. Not now he has so eagerly reminded me of what I am. A dark creature. One of the monsters who caused my mother’s death.

“Let’s go,” I say. “You’re clearly bored.”

“I’m not bored,” Snow says, although he is at least following me. “I’m concentrating on the mission. I’ve never seen another vampire before. Do you think they’re all fit like the goblins?”

reason for cut:

as above. but it’s getting closer. 

--

originally the shakespeare exhibition was an exhibition on aztecs, because of all the GOLD, you see, and because there was an exhibition about aztecs in the museum at some point. i thought the exhibition could be called - get it - ‘golden days’. i don’t think i ever told milo this idea, but it would have made it into the fic if this had been a movie and no one had to draw attention to the idea. 

--

remember - bold is what i kept in the published draft.

All I need to do is remember a single thing that Snow likes doing and then find a way we can do it together. It can’t be too difficult. We’ve lived together for seven years and I’m obsessed with him. You’d think I’d have a list.

I don’t – but I could make one.

Things I know Simon Snow enjoys, a list:

Food. Which is fine – going to a restaurant is actually a perfectly good date activity, even though I don’t eat in front of other people. We can do it later, but at this point we still have five hours to kill. I don’t think even Snow wants to eat for the next five hours. (Does he?)

Following me around.

Making my life miserable.

Fighting dark creatures.

Going on ridiculous quests for the Mage to retrieve magickal objects and/or fight dark creatures. I don’t get it – Snow seems to almost die every time – but he does seem to enjoy them

Playing football.

Watching football. And other sports. I’ve seen him at a few lacrosse games, but I don’t know whether he actually enjoyed them. It’s possible he felt like he had to watch Wellbelove play

Talking to Bunce and Wellbelove about whatever ridiculous quest they’re currently on. Although, now they’ve broken up (again), perhaps Wellbelove is off the list. But I’m not exactly going to summon Bunce here either. That wouldn’t be a good date.

Video games?

As I’m thinking, we get to the bottom of the stairs and enter the Great Court. I don’t usually spend much time here when I’m visiting the museum – too much sun streaming in through the glass panels in the ceiling – but it’s dark now and artificial light doesn’t bother me.

There’s an exhibition on Aztecs on in the Reading Room space. It’s being advertised on long banners hanging down across the expanse of white space. I’d like to see it – another time.

“What now, then?” Snow says.

I still haven’t worked that out. (The list wasn’t as helpful as I’d hoped.)

reason for cut:

space. this was one of the first things to go. it doesn’t say anything that we don’t already know. i liked the idea of writing a list to be more like rainbow - but like baz i couldn’t think of anything simon liked ... and that was the point! 

--

“What the fuck?” Snow hisses at me as we get in line to pay for tickets. “You can’t do this.”

“It’s research.”

“It’s treason.”

If he asks, I’ll tell him that Shakespeare wrote about vampires in Timon of Athens. (He didn’t - obviously. But the odds of Snow having read that particular play are non-existent) (even I haven’t read it – it’s obscure. Terrible for spellcasting.) I’d tell him that there’s a crucial spell I need to understand before we go and deal with the creatures who killed my mother.

But Snow hasn’t asked. (He probably never asks the Mage why he needed to find the Third Gate or what was so important about all the white hares he was looking for in sixth year. For Snow it’s enough that there’s a job to do and that he can do it – I shouldn’t like that about him, but I do.)

He also isn’t objecting. Well, no – he is objecting, but he isn’t stopping me. He isn’t asking me any questions I can’t answer. He’s going along with it – letting me buy us both tickets for the exhibition and following me into the slightly darker interior of the Reading Room.

“Which one even is the First Folio?” he asks once we’re inside.

“I don’t know. Perhaps the one under the sign that says First Folio?” I say witheringly, although I’m actually delighted. (He’s helping. He’s part of it. This is going to work.)

“Right,” Snow says. “You mean, the one in a massive alarmed case, surrounded by people?”

We’re about three metres away from it. My heart speeds up as I look at the display. I’ve never stolen anything before – there’s a good chance this will go wrong. This is an idiotic idea. But it’s getting me closer to Snow.

Also, although I wouldn’t have chosen to do it this way, I do love the idea of owning a copy of the First Folio. It won’t be useful tonight, but I’m sure I’ll be able to work out something to use it for later.

“So, what’s your brilliant plan?” Snow says. “Hide in a cupboard until everyone’s gone home?”

He’s not being serious, but that probably is the most sensible thing we could do. And we’ve got the time.

But I don’t think I can handle being trapped in a confined space with Simon Snow for minutes, let alone for hours. Even if I hadn’t recently been trapped in a coffin for weeks.

He smells far too good for that.

“We’re magicians,” I tell him, remembering to sneer. “One of us is, anyway. I can do this in broad daylight without anyone noticing. All I need is a distraction – that’s your job.”

“What kind of distraction?” Snow asks.

“Collapse,” I suggest. “Start shouting about colonial theft, whatever appeals to you. Just as long as everyone turns to look at you. I’ll even cast, Your attention please.  Then I’ll take the book while everyone’s looking at you. I can cast a silencing spell on the alarm.”

“What about the cameras?” Snow asks.

I don’t want to tell him I’d forgotten the cameras.

“And I’ll cast Nothing to see here on myself,” I say smoothly – although I have no idea whether the spell works on technology. It’s not something we covered at Watford, a school where technology is banned. (I really hope my attempt to bond with Snow isn’t going to result in me being arrested. Think what my father would say when I had to explain myself.)  

“Penny usually uses Through a glass darkly,” Snow says. I shrug – I don’t know that spell.

“What’re you’re going to do when they find the book’s missing?” Snow prompts.

“Walk quickly. The attention spell won’t wear off before we leave the Museum.”

“Yeah, I wouldn’t count on that,” Snow says.

“What do you suggest then?”

“Spelling something to look like the book we’re nicking and leaving it in the case.”

He’s right – spells last longer if they have something physical to catch hold of. The attention spell will eventually wear off, but a transfiguration spell could last years without anyone noticing.

I’m grudgingly impressed. (And also increasingly alarmed about the kinds of things that Snow and Bunce have been up to. How many of our national treasures are carefully spelled replicas?)  

reason for cut:

this isn’t really cut - it’s just re-written. again, the mood is wrong in this version. simon is angry not flirty. the timon of athens bit is cut for space - it’s the kind of pointless baz ramble about magic that i’d include if time wasn’t an issue. 

you can see the seeds of what was eventually printed here - baz has never stolen anything, simon’s stolen lots of things and is competent at it. there’s the idea of the distraction - although i like it better when simon comes up with that one too. 

the real thing is much better though, right? i think i cracked it when i realised i didn’t have to play ‘you cant do that’ straight - because baz is right: simon enjoys this shit. 

--

these are bits and pieces of the above that don’t fit into a wider narrative:

There are tourists surrounding the case right now. And at least one security guard. My Nothing to see here is good, but it seems foolhardy to rely on it entirely. It works best when the person being distracted doesn’t want to see what’s happening. (It only sometimes works on Snow, for example.) It might not work on the security guards.

and another one:

I try not to smirk too broadly. “Right, then. Do something distracting. I’ll be back in a minute.”

I cast Nothing to see here on myself and take a few steps towards the case. My heart is beating wildly. The tourists surrounding it are definitely not looking at me. manage to take a few steps before Snow catches up with me. Taking my shoulders and steering me off towards a completely different case full of Tudor props.

“What is it, Snow? Couldn’t think of anything?”

His arm is still around my shoulders, drawing me in. Frankly I’m struggling to

“Sorry, was that really your entire plan?”

--

“Perhaps I’ll think about bringing them back after the British return the artefacts they stole from the rest the world.” I nod towards the nearest case. “My great-great grandfather hasn’t been back in Egyptian soil for hundreds of years. They wouldn’t even let us take him back to be buried in Pitch Manor.”

“Your––” Simon starts, and then he stops, frowning, as he presumably remembers that I am of Egyptian descent. “That’s not your grandfather,” he says – but he isn’t certain.    

“Didn’t I tell you I’m descended from royalty?” I say archly, which is enough to make Simon laugh. He presses his face into my neck, which I love.

“It was definitely implied.”

“That’s what my mother told me anyway,” I concede.

“I think she might have been having you on.”

(missing some thoughts here)

“It’s one of my clearest memories of her

“I’ll bring the books back,” I tell him. “I only took them in the first place to get your attention.”

Simon smiles at me in the reflection in the glass cabinet, his face superimposed over the golden burial mask below. I can see his chin hooked over my shoulder and his arms wrapped around my waist.

“Well. It worked,” he points out.

reason for cut:

again - space! i was right at the end and i knew i was running out of words. but i also think that being forced to cut the royalty joke which i hung onto for some time through several drafts was good for the fic. we dont need baz talking about the sarcophagus - we were there, we already read it at the beginning. 

the thing with the eyebrows that simon says in the published draft doesn’t quite work still, but what it does is kick us back to the memory (are they related? yes - we know they aren’t) in the same way that baz is doing actively in this draft. 

and what you see in the published version is that the point of the fic is (as we see here) that simon and baz are happy in the future, but also it’s that baz can talk to simon about his mother and... about the british museum. so the emphasis isn’t quite right if we end with ‘well it worked’. 

the emphasis should be on baz’s mother. i’m trying to get at it in this draft, but it’s in the middle rather than the end - shift the mother stuff/museum stuff to the final line, and bob’s your uncle. 

--

here’s the real thing: The sweet fruit of a palm tree 

[bazzybelle]

Name ten favorite characters from ten different things (books, tv, film, etc.), then tag ten people.

Thank you @fight-surrender and @xivz for tagging me! I send you hearts and happy. 

I won’t be tagging ten people, because I’m all tagged out... But if anyone wants to have the fun, by all means go ahead.

1) Simon Snow from Carry On / Wayward Son

So, kind of an obvious choice. I mean my favourite character from the series is Baz (to no one’s surprise) however, I relate SO much to Simon, it’s insane (which is ironic, considering I have so much trouble writing his POV). I especially relate to him in Wayward Son, with his depression, thoughts of worthlessness, thinking your partner deserves better than you, fucking intimacy issues.... 

At the same time, there’s also the need to always fight. Shit is hard, and life is hard, but I’m still fighting. And some days, I want to stay in bed and not go outside, but I’m fighting that urge. 

2) Luna Lovegood from Harry Potter

So I was always seen as “the weird kid” in school. Always kinda in the clouds, saying random things, acting weird. I never really knew how to act around people (hell, I still don’t know how to act around people). Because of that, I was bullied... a lot. 

Media doesn’t really shine a positive light on those who are considered “weird”. They are often times pushed aside and are used as comedic props (at least, it didn’t when I was kid). I read Harry Potter in my 20′s, and I wish I had read the books earlier, because I saw myself in Luna. Luna is the weird kid, but she does not give a flying EFF about. She knows who she is, and she’s proud to express herself in anyway she can. 

3) Piper Halliwell from Charmed (OG Charmed)

I was introduced to fandom worlds because of Charmed, so I felt like I had to include it here. 

I always connected to Piper and her personality. I’m actually not the middle child, I’m the oldest. But in terms of my cousins, I’ve been the one who was drowned out by the others. Never wanting to fight, very complacent and going with what everyone else wanted to do. 

Piper was the quiet one, but she also knew how to get shit done. When her sister are being ridiculous, she’s the one that pulls them together. She’s the heart of the family, and takes care of those around her. I especially admired her taking the reigns as head of the family after Prue dies. She’s heart broken, destroyed, and wants to give up, but she knows she can’t. he has to be strong for those around her. She has to pick up the pieces and help her family move on. 

Piper rocks. 

4) Selva Chopper from Namesake

Selva is just a burst of sunshine and happiness. She lives with her heart on her sleeves and she’s perfectly happy to do so. Her favourite activities include dressing up and making clothes, kissing her wonderful girlfriend, Alice, and giving her twin brother crap for being a dummy sometimes. 

Selva wants to explore the world and live her life without fear and paranoia. She’s finally starting to get a proper handle on her powers, and she’s ready to just be happy and live outside of Oz. 

At the same time, she is not someone to be trifled with. She is a very powerful witch in her own right, and if you push her to that limit, she can be down right ruthless. 

5) Sansa Stark from Game of Thrones (TV show)

Ok... I know I’m going to get a lot of crap for this (especially since the ending of GoT is downright controversial within fandoms, and if you mention it, you need to be ready for an argument). I’m not here to argue about the ending... so, please be nice. 

ANYWAYS, I actually liked Sansa’s character, and I especially loved her character’s development, from naive pretty-girl, to a smart, capable ruler. Sansa demonstrates that you can always learn from your experiences and grow from them. She takes the honour learned from her father, and combines that with the ruthlessness learned from Cersei, as well as the cunning learned from Littlefinger, to gain independence for her people, and come through as one of the survivors of the Game of Thrones. 

6) Cather Avery from Fangirl

As someone who spent a good chunk of her life, obsessing over fandoms and living within them, I really felt a connection to Cath. I used the fanfiction and RPing groups I was a part of in order to escape the shitty reality of my life. Also... massive anxiety... so yeah...

I need to re-read that book... It’s been a while since I read it.  

7) Emily Prentiss from Criminal Minds

I love badass women in media and Emily Prentiss is a bad ass b*tch. She’s also my top crush for now and forever. I swoon over her. 

She’s strong, powerful, but also extremely kind and gentle and fiercely protective of her team. She speaks several different languages, and is very intelligent and perceptive (she’s the only one who figures out that Reid’s abusing drugs). She is everything I want to be... Also, I just like looking at her. *sigh*

8) Lucian Darnay from The Binding

I love him so effing much! This book ruined me... I want to take Lucian and just give him a big hug and tell him that he deserves to be happy and that everything he’s been taught to believe is wrong. 

9) Howl from Howl’s Moving Castle

This is recent, because I only saw the movie like a month ago, but I’ve latched onto it, and I’m a little obsessed (what... really... shocker, i know). It doesn’t help that my current favourite fic is @ninemagicks Howl fic, so that’s been feeding my Howl obsession. 

He’s just such a funny character and so over the top. Like I love how Sophie just yells at him and calls him on his bullshit... It’s great!

At the same time, he is so kind and gentle, and wants to do what’s best, even though he doesn’t always have the courage to do so. 

10) Faye Whitaker from Questionable Content 

I have been following this webcomic for many many years, and one of my favourite characters to follow is Faye. Her story has had so many ups and downs, and she has been through hell and back, and has come out on top. She has had to deal with a horrifying childhood memory, her issues with opening herself up to people, learning to allow herself to love, and what to do once you’ve hit rock bottom. 

Faye’s mental health journey is honestly inspiring. To see her finally in a stable, healthy relationship and doing something that makes her happy is so wonderful. 

[elliswriting]

11/11/11 Tag Game

answer 11 questions, tag 11 people, ask 11 questions

these incredible questions were written by @sundaynightnovels

1) your wip is now set in percy jackson’s world (if you don’t know, it’s just a bunch of monsters from greek mythologies chasing after young kids who have powers. we’re assuming your OCs are all demigods here, so they have powers and are being chased). who would be the one flailing and crying for help? who would be the one standing in front and thinking of a solution? who would be the first one eaten and who would be the one to survive till they reach camp? 

how do I answer this if my WIP is already set in what is pretty much just the PJO universe? Everyone but Daisy is pretty well-adapted to it, but it’s new to her and she’s the one everyone is trying to kill. 2) after barely escaping percy jackson’s world, they’re now thrown into harry potter. the dementors are everywhere. what are the bad memories that these dementors draw from your OCs? how do they react to it? (don’t worry, they’re saved before being given the kiss. somehow.)

For Daisy and Hyacinth it’s their mother’s death. For Erme it could be anything really, they’re got nothing but trauma (though it could also be their mother’s death tbh). 3) they’re now plopped into the good place. who is in the good place, and who is in the bad place? (for those who don’t watch the show, well. i think this naming speaks for itself)

I don’t think anyone belongs in the good place, this story is full of murderers.

4) ah, bummer. some misfiling of paperwork from the higher-ups, sorry. your OCs are once again alive and kicking, but then things happen again and well, they’re in marvel and the Snap has just happened (i.e., people have suddenly disappeared into dust after an event and no one knows what happened to them). assuming individual scenarios for your OCs where each of them are the only one left in the group, how would they react and what are their coping mechanisms?

Daisy would freak tf out, Erme would be eaten alive by guilt (somehow more than they already are), Hades would just go about business as usual 5) and then the Blip happens and everyone is back, after five years! hurray! once again, assuming individual scenarios for your OCs where each of them are the only one left in the group, and then everyone suddenly returns like nothing’s happened, how would they then react to this change of scenario? how do they adapt?

Daisy would be so relieved. Like I think she would eventually get on with her life, but she’d still be so happy to have everyone back (and finally be the older twin). Hades might have to scramble a little to readjust an underworld to a population that has suddenly doubled, but he’d manage. Erme probably would not believe it was real. 6) all is well for a while, until The Fire Nation Attacked. who runs away and hides in isolation? who joins the colonising forces? who attempts a rebellion? who concedes defeat and lets the enemies in?

Daisy’s the reluctant Avatar. Hades tries to keep his people out of the fight, Erme plays both sides until the Avatar reappears and then it magically becomes their duty to get her ready to defeat the fire nation. 7) alright, now let’s give your OCs a break. they’re back in school and it’s high school musical! which typical high school cliques are each of them in and why?

Hyacinth actually had a big scene/emo phase in high school before she turned into a ditsy blond instagram model adult. Daisy’s friends were the sort of weird baby gays. Erme and Pauly would be jocks, Hades would be that put-together kids everyone liked and was super smart and was the head of like three clubs. 8) now we’re in deadpool and it’s time to break the 4th wall and change the focus to: the author. what kind of jokes / things do you want to include in your wip but can’t seem to, maybe because of genre restrictions or age restrictions or it just, well, doesn’t fit? (ryan reynolds would say to include it all anyway, but yknow, that’s because he has money)

No restrictions I’d have a lot more gore and sexual content. They are things that appear in the series, I just kind of skim over most of it to keep it more within my fantasy genre. But realistically, sex and gore.  9) following the ryan reynolds thread, what is the one most indulgent thing you’ve done in your writing / would do in your writing? 

I’ve made like 90% of the cast of characters super diverse. I’ve got non-het romantic and sexual orientations out the wazoo, every gender orientation you can think of, disabilities, mental illnesses, a ton of different races and religions and beliefs. And the few characters who are your general straight white mary-sues tend to be the villains.  10) who is your favourite friends member and why? (this is important okay? to those who haven’t watched friends… i can’t really give you much of an explanation for this one and more importantly – why??)

FUCK ROSS GELLER. My favorite character is probably Chandler because he’s just so weird, but that may be because I am Monica. Baby fever, wedding fever, OCD, everything has to be my way, everything is a competition, even our style is the same 11) this is the end! what is the most foolish thing you’ve done in your / with regards to your writing? it can literally be anything – a silly spelling mistake, gaping plot hole, printing it out for a friend to read and missing a page, you can really go wild with your answer here.

A friend and I wrote this collaborative project years ago, and we’d head each entry with the POV character’s name. It wound up being about 75k, and as time went on, we got worse and worse about spelling character names correctly, and eventually we stopped correcting them. So the second half of the document is just full of entries titled “Charkue Charfie Carlie Charlie!” “DEsvmin, DEsmnod, Demons, Darren Cris, DESMOND GOD”

Tags and questions under the cut:

Tagging some new followers! @ezwriting @arte-muse @ninalitediting @lilywrites01 @commasinsidequotes @authoralexander​ @faerisms​ @emrowene​ @lmorasey​ @sober-two​ @eggletine​ 

And my questions for y’all:

What genre do you write?

Are you a planner, pantser, or planster?

What is your approach to research?

What POV is your novel? Why are you writing it this way?

Do you know how your story ends before you start writing?

When creating characters, what comes first: appearance, backstory, motivation, personality, something else?

What trope do you actually like?

How did you come up with your title?

If your WIP had a theme song, what would it be?

How has your MC developed, not within the plot, but since you first created them?

Your MC faces certain death.  What are their last words?

[pluttskutt]

First Impressions Tag

@elizabethsyson tagged me in this forever ago and it took so long but I’ve really been thinking and decided to go with Loke because I won’t write his backstory and I’m not sure if the outcome is good but I had fun writing o(^▽^)o

Rule: Share (or write) a scene where one of your POV characters sees another for the first time!

Loke spun around in the chair secretly wishing he had brought a handheld console; smartphones, or any generation after with access to the internet, were forbidden in the security room. All he had for enjoyment were the many screens recording what happened in the facility and a typing device of some sort to log in. It looked like a laptop but it wasn't a laptop because it had no games whatsoever.

At the next staff meeting, he'd bring up that something had to change. Did they even have staff meeting? A suggesting box?

  The screen in front of him lit up with new text that he hadn't written. He rolled back to see what had happened.

"Hello." It said in bold yellow letters.

Thinking it was a staff higher up in the chain he decided to reply. "Hey, didn't realise there was a chatting system on this thing, who is this?" Perhaps too informal but he wasn't paid enough to be formal anyway.

"Are you bored? Would you like to play a game?"

Loke shot back from the screen. "I've seen enough horror to know where this is going, someone playing a prank on me?" Not that he had a single friend at work who would but maybe the higherups had their fun with new security people?

The screen lit up again with yellow text, and Loke rolled back to be sure it wasn't a system failure.

"I am this system's AI, but you have not chosen your settings."

A.I? Oh, that's what that information template had been about. Did no government in any world ever learn that artificial intelligence brought out the worst in humanity?

"Would you like me to run a simple guide? This includes choosing my voice and unlocking the cafeteria."

Loke leant back in his chair and thought about it. No one had mentioned an A.I in the facility but again, he was a secretary at the lowest level. Not even as on the lowest floor in the building because that was top secret, just a secretary who got coffee for his lowest level boss. They handled invoices or something like that. He hadn't really cared since that wasn't his job.

"Choices will appear on your screen and you will push the button corresponding to the choice you want, do you understand my instructions?"

It appeared the A.I took his silence as yes, so he didn't type anything and the screen lit up first with a question, then with the choices. The first was what kind of voice he prefered, so he chose gender-neutral because an A.I should not be gendered. His headset crackled for a short moment.

"Hello." A voice sounded in his ears.

Loke near screamed in horror but settled for swearing. "Give me a warning first! Fuck!"

"I apologise, but this game will go faster if we talk, would you like a milkshake to calm your nerves with?"

"All I have is a banana." And a water bottle of course. It was the most boring job of all so he had counted on falling asleep by the screens.

"They have a blender in the cafeteria and all ingredients to make a milkshake,  which is written to be your favourite drink in your file."

Loke turned his head and stared at the wall like he was in a tv-series. "You read my file?" This was it; lured to his death in the cafeteria by an A.I with the promise of milkshake.

"Of course, I have access to everything but I would advise against using me to increase your paycheck as I must report you."

The door out opened and the lamps turned on. Loke understood the A.I truly accessed everything. It could still be a prank though. "What do I call you?"

Silence met his question. The doors to the cafeteria lit up green and opened so it was still there though. "Do you have a personal connection to the name Ava?"

"Nope," Loke said, as the door to the cafeteria opened. The lamps turned on and showed a clean to the top, sparkling, and roomy cafeteria he avoided during lunch because it was too loud. He had seen it once on his tour but that was it. Night shifts were the jam.

"Do you approve of me analyzing your speech patterns and behaviour to understand you better?"

"What? So you can give it to my boss and they'll-"

"I do not work for your boss." Ava interrupted when Loke was in the midst of gathering every ingredient for his milkshake.

"You… whom do you work for?" This was it, this was when he was killed. Had he just been smart enough to get a good job he wouldn't even be there. Would he get to enjoy his milkshake first?

"There is a high probability you will find out, and you will be glad to know Mister Hansson hides chocolate sauce in the cabinet behind the sugar."

Tagging:

@tessa1972

@cadewrites

@royalbounties

@savannahscripts

@inexorableblob

@ren-c-leyn

@ruthewriter

Let me know if you want to be added or removed from my tag list, don’t feel forced to do this!

[luminoustico]

For End of the Year Writing Meme: All the questions sound super interesting so just use this as an opportunity to answer whatever questions interest you most

So funny story I put this in my drafts to complete in the quiet time of New Year’s Day, but then I forgot about it completely. BRACE YOURSELF.

A. If you could rec a piece of music to accompany one of your fics, what would you pick? Why?

Lies by Marina and the Diamonds, to accompany the latter half of Valse Melancolique. It’s a really good song to show Irene’s POV at that point, especially her reluctance to accept that the webs she’s spun are basically collapsing around her.

“I just want it to be perfect / To believe it’s all been worth the fight,” is the most relevant set of lyrics, IMO.

B. Who’s your favourite side-character from something you wrote?

I really enjoyed writing side characters like Rose and Finn, though Rose just edges it because I’ve been enjoying writing her in Don’t Complicate It. Finn runs a very close second.

C. Get any good comments on your stuff this year?

Sure! All comments are good comments, let’s be real. Unless they’re an obvious troll comment or those “update now!!!” kind of comments. Those aren’t so good.

D. Any drawings or pictures that had a big influence on your writing?

The artwork of the late 18th century and Roberto Ferri definitely influenced the tone of Valse Melancolique. Many scenes from certain stories were driven by a single image I had in my head as well.

E.  Who’s your favourite main character you’ve written?

Though I do enjoy delving into Ben/Kylo’s psyche, I enjoy writing Rey more – she’s more enclosed, and I love chipping away at characters to get to their truths.

G. Where do you think you grew the most this year?

Towards the end of the year, I began to realise that writing can actually be fun like it used to be. I’ve been so aware of the way the world is currently that I’ve been convincing myself that my writing must have a message, or it’s not ‘worthy’. I need to understand that I started writing not to pass on any morals or messages, but as a release and a way to find enjoyment in the constant buzz.

H.  How do you write? Paper, pen, computer? Music, no music?

All of those. I write on my phone, on my computer, on pen and paper. Music and no music, it depends. Most often I’m listening to a playlist/album which then stops and I cease writing an hour or so later realising I’ve been writing in silence.

I.  What’s your favourite work you did this year? Why?

I’m always tempted to answer this kind of question with my most recent story. But I’m going to be really honest and say that star among the stars is a personal favourite. And it’s not just because of the pegging.

J.  What are the best jokes you told this year? Any jokes you thought were funny that people didn’t catch? Vice-versa?

I’m completely blanking on this one.

K. Who have you killed this year? Why did they have to die?

Qui-Gon Jinn (to match with canon), Molly and Sherlock (hey it was a story based on Dangerous Liaisons, and I was reading classical Russian literature at the time of plotting) and Kylo Ren a bunch of times (metaphorically).  

L.  Which character did you most write about this year, and why do you like ‘em?

I wrote more about Rey. As mentioned before, it’s because I like chipping away at a character’s surface but also it’s because I really relate to her, especially in regards to her feelings of loneliness and her tendency to put on ‘a brave face’. Plus I really admire her compassion and her strength. I envy it.

M. Meta! Have any meta about a story you’re dying to throw out there?

Not particularly -- just headcanons and reasons behind why I write what I write. (I’ve never been very good with meta anyway.) I really like it when other people meta my fic, or pick up on something I didn’t! That is an AMAZING feeling. 

O. Do you believe in outlines? Show us one!

I do indeed! I love my outlines. For some projects, I’ve got whole folders with docs labelled Initial Ideas, Plot Summary, Chapter Outline, etc. etc. I’ve got my notes app on my phone stuffed up to the gills with mini-outlines. I frequently use my story structure template, which is technically more for screenplays, but the breaking down into acts thing helps my brain figure things out. 

P. What are your pet peeves in other people’s work?

When an author relies too much on UST and ruins the pacing. Like, an author drags out the first getting together because they believe that the anticipation is the only thing generating comments. If it’s right to have them bang, have them bang! The awkward morning after is a delicious opportunity for UST -- just a different kind. 9 times out of 10, your readers are there not for the smut because they’re invested in the story and like your writing.

Q. Quote three bits of writing you read this year. Can be your writing, or not.

Let’s mix it up.

“ “Why did you do that?” he demanded as they ducked into a side alley. “What part of ‘keep a low profile’ is difficult for you to understand?”

“I’m a good haggler,” Rey said through a full mouth. She didn’t have any idea what she was eating, and she didn’t care. It took so much effort to chew each bite instead of gulping it down whole. “He was trying to cheat us.”

“You didn’t haggle. You pushed.”

“I did not. Why would I knock him over in the middle of his stand?”

Kylo just stared. “You need a teacher,” he muttered. He watched her eat for a moment, his expression somewhere between thoughtful and disgusted, before taking a bite from one of his own skewers. Disgust won out. ” -- Symmetry and Black Tar by audreyii_fic. (Grumpy smuggler Kylo Ren, spunky scavenger Rey, canon divergence. Excellent.)

“ "Ben," Rey breathes once Kylo's mere inches away. It's the name Luke introduced him with, the only name she knows him by, and he's never bothered to correct her. Why hasn't he corrected her? The question flees from his mind as she closes her eyes and he leans down into the space between them, kissing her full on the lips. It's not gentle, he doesn't know how to be, but she opens for him the way the flowers she loves so much bloom in the sunlight. ” -- the surface of last scattering by diasterisms. (It’s the apocalypse, it’s exactly the right time to meet the love of your life, right? Read for utter devastation.) 

“ Rey could spend hours in the Falcon’s inner workings. She’d spent so much time in the belly of hollowed-out Star Destroyers, which were horrific remnants of old worlds, cold and grey. The Falcon is alive, speaking a strange language she’s just about half-deciphered. Sometimes, on days where she misses the connection most and dreams of a boy reaching across the stars to find her, it feels like the Falcon doesn’t want to speak to her. It shuts down. Sparks spit at her, and mechanisms develop odd faults.Today, a jet of steam blows directly in her face, not harmful, but almost like a snarl of 'go away'.

Rey climbs out of the hatch, fetching tools. She works with that fault first.

“I’m not thinking about him,” she promises to no-one but the ship she’s looking after. ” -- If I was born as a blackthorn tree, by me!

R. If you had to rewrite one of your stories from scratch, which one would it be? What would you do to it?

Going to cheat here and head back to 2017. I’d rewrite Two Stars Aligned. What I’d probably do is make it a post-TLJ fic, where Rey and Ben decide to run away after getting involved in a secret relationship, but get shot down by the First Order -- after landing in Giaca, they become embroiled in Game of Thrones style politics and the ruling families, while the Resistance and the First Order conduct searches for them. I’d cut out the weird Force shit and make the redemption arc thing more organic by giving the whole story room to bloody breathe. Two Stars Aligned is actually the reason why I now try to stick to oneshots for exchanges and any anthologies I get involved in.

S. What’s the sexiest thing you wrote this year?

Sexiest thing written in 2018... It’ll have to be the pegging in star among the stars.

T. Themes, motherfucker, do you have them? What are they?

Feminism. Females being allowed to be as fucked-up and broody as the men they love, and perhaps, even broodier. Make women afraid of commitment, 2k19.

U. Any stories that took an abrupt U-turn from where you thought they were going?

If I were a blackthorn tree took a pleasing turn away from the initial outline. The initial idea was lots of secret trysts and stuff like that, but I much prefer the quiet romance with a note of hope at the end that it turned out to be.

V. Which story was the most viscerally pleasing to write? Tell us your narrative kinks.

Huh. Hm. Don’t Complicate It is turning out to be kind of fun to write; when I’m not allowing myself to be crippled by the brain goblins that is (they’re strong lately). It’s a combo of writing a trope/kink I’ve been wanting to write for ages -- A/B/O -- and remembering that it’s okay to have fun with it.

W.  Who are your favourite writers?

@kylo-wouldnt-like-those-chips - @conchepcion (every time I think I’m out, she pulls me back in *shakes fist*) - @introspectivenavelgazer - @audreyii-fic - @kylorenvevo - ambiguously - @fettuccine-alfreylo and SO MANY MORE (this post is long enough already!!)

X.  What’s your least favourite work of this year?

My least favourite has to be In Cars. It was an ambitious idea, which I didn’t really fulfil, I feel. Curse of being a perfectionist. I want something to be amazing. World-changing! Tear-jerking! I want Vestal virgins to weep golden tears over my words, already delicately transcribed onto ancient parchment by monks. Obviously, that’s an impossible standard, but I can’t help being cross when I don’t reach it.

Y. Why did you write? For fun, for a friend, for acclaim?

During 2018? Mostly for acclaim. It made 2018 a very difficult year for writing, and just a difficult year in general. I’m trying to make sure I have fun during 2019 with this stuff. Striving for perfection is a punishing task that no-one can ever accomplish because perfection doesn’t exist. Contentment does, though. As does happiness. And those should be more important.

Z. If you could choose one work and immediately finish it, what would it be? How would you end it?

I’d finish Sanctum, my priest Kylo fic. I’m split between continuing or rewriting anyway (the rewrite would include relocating the action to the medieval era, around the time Luther wrote that damned essay and pinned it to the church door). But I do know the exact image I want to finish on, which will remain whether I end up rewriting or not. It involves a name, a scrap of material and a rather fetching colour scheme. 

Ooh. Cryptic.

[greedisgreen]

Thank you so much for your fics, greedisgreen. Your writing style is so good, and your Petyr and Sansa are always very complex and interesting. My favourite fics are Sansa and Petyr make a porno and Within a Gilded Cage :) I would like to ask you what Petyr you like better in canon, book!Petyr or show!Petyr, and if you would like P and S end up together in the series. I would love if more creepyshippers answer these questions. We can have an interesting discussion :) (1)

Thank you for your kind praise, anon. It always lifts my spirits to know that my writing is appreciated. However, I’m not sure if there was supposed to be a second part to this. If so, I’m sorry, anon, but it appears tumblr ate it. Anyway, I’ll do my best to explain my stance below the cut.

I appreciate aspects of both portrayals. 

I love the sass and sarcasm of book!Petyr. The hidden agenda he keeps close to his chest, and the calculation that he puts into the moves he makes. The way he is everyone’s friend and none. The fact that he’s a sneaker, a creeper, a two-faced double dealer – all the hallmarks of a wonderful villain, yes? But there is sooo much more to him. 

The softer glimpses of him we see in his youth: saving the lost Tully sisters on a fog covered road, playing kissing games in the Godswood, his naive love of Catelyn. He wanted so badly to be her Prince of Dragonflies, to believe in the faerie tales, that it just breaks my heart for him when it all comes crashing down. 

Then, to see years later how he has picked up the pieces of himself – embraced the mask of Littlefinger. The sheer goddamn fortitude and determination it must have taken to move past the trauma of losing (quite literally) everything he knew and starting over. It’s inspiring even as it should be a somewhat cautionary tale. His extreme reaction to all he suffered, twisted and eroded the goodness in him, but not completely. We already see that facade he’s built so thick crumbling whenever he is with Sansa. It’s not much, but those little snippets (especially in that tWoW chapter) really show that there is more to him than just a blackguard in it for himself. He does seem to want Sansa to be happy. Whether that is from a place of paternal caring, romantic ideation, or just wanting his best asset to not be a miserable is hard to say with certainty. Without a Petyr POV, we’ll likely never really know what his true intentions are there, and I think that’s the way GRRM wants it. The mystery allows the reader to project their own desires onto the character, and there’s a certain appeal in that. I choose to read it as romantic/protective, even as he is literally one of the main factors in the downfall of her house.

Now show!Petyr, oh sweet fucked up show!Petyr. I both love and loathe him. 

The portrayal of Petyr Baelish in the show has been hotly debated, and for good reason. Baelish in the show is not the Baelish of the books. He just isn’t. Right off the bat, people distrust him. He’s openly reviled by people who have dealt with him for years, and it really makes zero sense for him to have been on the small council as long as he was if that was the case. The writers completely did a disservice to the character by making him a blatant villain from the very first season. 

As much as I fucking love brothel Baelish and his monologue during the sexposition scene, it really fucked him over in catastrophic ways. It had a ripple effect through S2 (hello confrontation with Cat that never would have happened) and beyond, turning Baelish from cunning politician into the “Nice Guy” who couldn’t accept rejection. The problem with that, of course, is that he did accept the rejection in the books. He wrote one letter to Cat post-duel and never once attempted to contact her again UNTIL Varys alerted him to her presence in King’s Landing. Then, they made him appear even sleazier by having Cat brought straight to the brothel rather than having her snuck into his offices in the Red Keep, like in the books. We all know it was because D&D wanted the T&A, but still, it doesn’t exactly invoke trust.

And yet…

Aidan Gillen’s performance saved the character for me – for a time at least. He brought a warmth to subpar material, and made Petyr Baelish human in a way that we really don’t see much of in the books current timeline. So for that, I do have a soft spot for the show. Will I ever in a million years watch beyond S4? Hell to the no. 

So for me, I suppose book!Baelish will always be bae.

As to your other question: Do I want Petyr and Sansa to end up together?

Of course, I fucking do. I wouldn’t ship it if I didn’t. Their parallels are so striking in comparison to every other relationship in the series. Each starts off innocent and trusting. Each has that innocence stripped away in the harshest of ways. Each is forced to wear a mask and act contrary to their person. The only difference between them is how ingrained Littlefinger is to Petyr versus Alayne to Sansa. That, I think, will cause contention in their relationship going forward. For as much as Petyr may come to care for Sansa, I don’t think he’ll ever be able to leave Littlefinger and his ambitions behind.

[nooradeservedbetter]

Hey, how was Noora/ William exactly (emotionally?) abusive? I interpreted as as a difference of morals and of course, William is not completely mature (they're both teenagers) so he distanced himself from Noora emotionally bc of this one situation (I thought this was a misunderstanding?) But he does care about her, he is reasonable and he is able to learn? (btw I don't send this to you b/c I want to discuss, I just like to understand different perspectives; you don't have to answer) Thanks

Hi anon. I have a lot of opinions on noorhelm, and I’m gonna use @ernestine-scatterbrain‘s classification of s2 to give an opinion of it in all of its parts (since it’s the weakest season from a narrative pov, and it lacks continuity).

Episodes from 1 to 3: William le trouduc - William the asshole

Okay so literally, he’s messaging her while she’s ignoring him. Repeatedly. And not in a “oh that’s a game”. Games are fun, games are not you look freaking hot in that shirt and suddenly you cover yourself. If it were a game, a message like that would have mean a teasing smile to yourself, and adjusting the shirt probably. Not putting on your overcoat. So it’s not a game. It’s just William literally harassing her and her not knowing what the block function is (of course, or there wouldn’t have been a s2 but I’m digressing). He acts like she owes him a date (biNCH WHERE) and literally uses Vilde to get Noora to go to that date, calling her and getting her hopes up.

And she goes on a date with him! Because he blackmailed her into that! Amazing. And the date itself oooo boi, it resembles so much the kind of discussions I’ve had with my ex for fucking two years, and my ex was emotionally abusive.So, like. He acts like he doesn’t understand that blackmailing someone into a date is not something that good people do. How could little ole William understand that? And they have a discussion over that, of course, because she’s RIGHTFULLY pissed off and she calls him off on the fact that he thought that he could change her mind with a date (after three+ months of texting in which she did not reply to his avances bc she wasn’t interested). He treats her rage as something to laugh about–like the you’re cute when you’re angry kind of bullshit, and he acts like he didn’t blackmail her into going on a date with him. Of course she could refuse, like, Noora, were you the same girl I texted? Your perception of reality is all fucked up, of course I didn’t force you to do anything, here, let me fuck a bit with yout perception of reality and explain why it’s you who are guilty, and not me, the fucking blackmailer.

That amazing gaslight is what my ex did to me every single time we argued (and we argued a lot, and I wasn’t allowed to get angry at him but anyway). I know what it is, I know how to recognise it. I am fucking trained and with my hackles raised because I don’t fucking want another abusive relationship to happen to me, of course I would recognise his behaviour for what it is.

Then in ep 3 pls someone show me what’s the trigger that makes Noora want to stay at William’s, what happens. Nothing happens, it’s just bad storytelling. Anyway.

Episodes from 5 to 8: William and Noora ♥♥:

The harassment becomes truly a game this time. This is what a chasing game looks like, more or less. Not the shit of the first three episodes. Here she smiles at him, and she does want to be chased; she replies to his messages, she acts hard to get but she almost wants him (or, at least, she likes the attention he gives her). Why did things change? God only knows, but even if she can forget what he did to her for three+ months, I can’t. So I can’t enjoy the game knowing about what he did to her in the first three episodes. Anyway.

(She does tell him that he’s a manipulating egotistic asshole, and this is amazing, but they kiss afterwards. The het fics I used to write were more or less like this tbh lmao. But I was 14.)

He doesn’t talk to her about his brother and acts truly awful towards her in front of him, which sets things up for the date rape arc–he only got himself to blame. And when she tries to tell him he goes like “nothing to do w/ you” and that’s it. Not abusive per se, but it fits in a context of “you don’t have the right to know things” which, yikes. Toxic.

(And they don’t talk. At all. Like Isak and Even talk so much, and even Eva and Jonas talked more than Noora and William. It’s just him manipulating her, or them arguing, or them hooking up. Nothing else. Just an ensemble of images disconnected from one another, with the purpose of making us feel something. Like pornography for teen girls, I suppose.)

Here we also have William literally smashing a bottle on the head of someone else, and then talking her in circles and spouting off fake philosophy to justify himself. Things that could make sense in a vacuum, but since they’re used to literally justify a street brawl and not, like, class struggle, they’re trash. Just like him.

My real true problem with this segment is the conversation Noora has with Sana. It’s a realistic conversation, and I know if from rl experiences, but in the context of it meaning a growth moment for Noora/the show’s views behind the characters, I think it’s the worst part.Noora literally tells Sana–a person she greatly admires and treats a bit as if she were superior–that he fucks with her head, he talks her in circles, he manipulates her and she can’t think properly anymore. And Sana basically replies “it’s all on u bc u don’t accept ppl thinking differently than u do”, like lmao. L M A O. What the fuck. So the shows takes all the instance of manipulation and gaslighting, and tells us “it’s not what you see, it’s just that you don’t have the nurse complex enough, try to understand him and put yourself aside

Episodes from 9 to 12 - the date rape arc

This is my favourite part of s2 tbh. They treated Noora’s reaction and her aftermath with such tact that you wonder if it’s the same people who wrote her relationship with William. Because William is once again the one who ruins everything.

[A bit digressing but I’m fucking angry about the fact that they made the best objective advice for Noora in the whole season to fall from Niko’s lips. “Run for the fucking hills” is what she should have done, but it’s the worst character of the series to say it, because we’re not supposed to think that it makes sense :)))]

He only got himself to blame if he refused to tell nothing about Niko, and instead he blames her for how she acts after she thinks she was raped. From a storytelling pov, it doesn’t make sense that they have their resolution off-screen, via text, but anyway. Of course by now she’s learnt what does she have to do, so she sucks it up and says she’s sorry. About reacting badly to thinking he was raped. Of course, it’s her fault lmao. And he doesn’t even contradict her, it’s just all. Fucking. Horrible. Thinking about it makes me fucking sick to my stomach.

Annnd I’m finished with my long rant. No readmore, we die like men.

[bloonstuff]

I was tagged by @skinnyluvlarry 💙

Name/nickname/whatever you prefer to be called? My name is Sara but I’m usually called a mixture of Sara, Sara Bloo or Bloo. I prefer Bloo because it’s more neutral.  Pronouns? she/they/him  I’m comfortable with any of those really.  I mostly go by she/her for convenience because it doesn’t cause me any discomfort.

Age? 26. I’ll be 27 in April. Rip me. 

Favourite Skam character? Fucking hell. I’m not sure I can choose. I think that’s the beauty of this show, everyone is so complex but relatable. There’s no throwaway characters. With most other shows I can at least narrow it down to a couple of characters but I just can’t with Skam. I mean I even like Emma and almost everyone hates Emma. Can I just not with this question? 

When did you start watching Skam? I think around the end of November. I don’t really remember because I have no concept of time. I was watching Philkas stuff on YouTube and this fan video for Philkas/Evak was suggested to me. I had to find out who the other couple were and Googled them, which led me to Tumblr and then I was hooked. I hadn’t really used Tumblr much at all in a long time until the Skam fandom got me hooked. I think I found the show and the fandom just at the right time. When I needed it. 

When did you make your blog? Jeez, I don’t want to know if I’m honest. I feel old enough as it is. I’m not completely sure if this is my original account or even my original bloonstuff blog or not, actually. I’ve made a few in my time. I did try to make a Skam blog last week but it only lasted two days. I like to keep my blog eclectic. 

Who are you cheering for to be s4′s main? Even, for sure. I already feel cheated out of so much with him and I think there’s so much left to tell of his story. It’s a really important story too. It’s not often we get to see an accurate portrayal of someone dealing with mental illness, especially from their POV. That being said, if we can’t have Even then Magnus would be my second pick. I feel like there’s a lot more to him than the silly guy we see on the surface. I want to know the different layers to him. Really though I wouldn’t mind any of the guy squad. Not because I’m not interested in the girl squad but because I like the symmetry of having 2 girl mains and then 2 guys. Who do you think is most likely to be S4′s main? I think it’s anybody’s game. Okay, maybe not anybody’s but there’s definitely a few horses running at the same speed. Sana is definitely up there and she definitely is another with obviously important story to tell. 

What are your main interests? Aside from Skam you mean? Uh, I watch a lot of other shows and I love film too. I also run my own lifestyle blog over on blogger, which you can find at bloonstuff.com I write about everything I’m interested in and whatever I get up to. My favourite thing to write on my blog is reviews. I review films, books (which I sometimes do in exchange for an arc) and toys. I’ve also reviewed a couple of subscription boxes for different companies. Something I’ve started writing lately is fan fiction (thanks to my friends at the Scream Team) and I’m really enjoying that. I love writing fiction and this has gotten my creative juices flowing again. I also do general arts and crafts and I love animals. I’ve probably forgotten something but there you go. 

Something you’re always up to discuss? Anything I find remotely interesting. 

Something you refuse to discuss? Anything I find boring.  Things I can’t emotionally distance myself from in that moment.

Other favourite shows aside from Skam? Jeez, this is just going to be off the top of my head. I’m sure there’s going to be ones I love that I can’t remember because I haven’t watched them in a while.

Degrassi Shadowhunters The 100 Looking Please Like Me  RuPaul’s Drag Race Friday Night Lights Girl Meets World Nashville The Fosters Gilmore Girls The Vampire Diaries Queer As Folk Shameless US And probably like 100 more tbh. 

Anyway, thank you to @skinnyluvlarry for tagging me in this. It was fun!  If I missed a rule on how many people you’re supposed to tag then I’m sorry but I’m going to tag 5 people because I prefer numbers that end on 0 or 5. 

If any of you guys have already done this then ignore me. (:  @alterlove-alterevak @evakoorhelm @isaksavedeven @bookwhipped @nothing-but-a-fangirl