#are you willing to die for honor or for love or for freedom OR die when the oppressors have grown tired of you and your betrayals failed to

[grasshopperdoingdogpaddle]

Do you think Raimundos betrayal affected his and Omis relationship at all?

Oh yeah, gravely.

The foundation of that bond was built of deep trust, on Omi's end.

After a lifetime of growing up in the temple with fellow monks and colleagues who never had to question their values against each other, Raimundo is the first outside person who Omi grows to trust and really warm up to. He's the most confusing, but also the most fascinating.

Omi learns that even though he says and does things he doesn't understand, Raimundo loves them. Even though he lies and tricks them, he never does so maliciously. It is curious. It is funny. Raimundo has a sort of cleverness that Omi vocally acknowledged and admired. Omi sees him as confusing and knows he won't really get a lot of Raimundo's actions, but still trusts that they will always, at the core of it, be driving by caring about them, and trusts that Raimundo's cleverness and experience simply means there are some things Omi will need to have blind faith in him for.

Omi literally can't even fathom that Raimundo would actually want to hurt them. The foundation of his feelings for Raimundo is that even if Omi can't understand Raimundo's mind, Omi can trust Raimundo's heart.

Even the confusing, strange things Raimundo does, he does them because he cares about them, in Omi's eyes. He loves them, and Omi can't imagine wanting to intentionally hurt people you love. They always came through in the end for each other before.

So when reality does eventually hit, with the betrayal and how far it's taken, the entire foundation of that faith crumbled, along with everything about the relationship that was built on top of it.

The other dragons almost die multiple times, and would have definitely died if Jack hadn't been a surprise wildcard in the events. Omi almost loses the temple he grew up in. The others think that Omi has been lost to the past forever, and all of that... doesn't change anything in Raimundo, it seems. Not til the very end.

Omi can't come out of that experience feeling the same way. All his friends were nearly lost to this. Loyalty and honor were integral to Omi's being, and this was his hard way of learning that that's not universal. As it turns out, Omi understood even less than he thought he did, and he can't just have blind faith that the parts he don't understand are still something he can rely on anymore.

Omi's the first one to speak up against Master Fung to advocate that they let Raimundo come back to the temple after everything that happened, because he does think Raimundo deserves a second chance and a place there.

But Omi also is very honest about the fact that he's deeply traumatized by everything that happened and does not feel ready trust Raimundo again. He's willing to go forward with some manner of team relationship, but not with trust again. That's Omi's boundary.

Omi feels really uncomfortable around Raimundo after that and isn't even sure if they can be called friends anymore.

And Raimundo is very resentful of the fact that Omi isn't giving Raimundo the same unconditional trust that Omi used to have in him.

He's angry that things won't just go back to where he left them off. He changed his mind and doesn't think anyone else should dwell on what he did either if they're supposed to be moving past it. But especially not Omi, since Omi doesn't try to hide how affected he was by it like the others do.

Omi's discomfort and Raimundo's resentment and their pain become the new foundation for whatever is to be rebuilt.

Which leads to its fair share of highs and lows.

Highs, like Omi being the one to never lose belief that Raimundo is reachable and fighting alongside them during the Heylin Comet incident, and even being the one to reach him! And Raimundo being the one brought to tears when Omi's turned into a cat and the one vocally challenging Chase to gamble for Omi's freedom, even being the most protective about Omi there.

Those two moments even being direct callbacks to each other!

"The Four of us!" "...Four?" "Yes, Four!"

But also, lows, like... everything that happens in The Return of Master Monk Guan, for example. A whole episode about deliberately reopening the others' scars from the first betrayal, and ending on such a callous note, too. Whatever progress towards healing the gap there was, that episode definitely stops it in its tracks and backtracks it.

Their bond's recovery has not been linear, to say the least.

It's a contentious relationship, and what it might have become without the betrayal is probably not what it's ever going to be now. But those are the circumstances they'll have to move forward with.

And despite it all, despite the things they'll never ever get back, they are, in some way, moving forward. Whatever that looks like.

[shiut]

Both danganronpa and even rain code have this underlying but incredibly persisting theme of the cognitive dissonance between one's personality vs their own nature that I can't help but think about a lot.

In my head I tend to call it the "Leon paradox" because he's the first and most obvious character I think of in regards to this, though he's far from being the only one. Despite being an effortlessly talented baseball prodigy, he dislikes doing it and his actual passion is becoming a musician. However, he's pigeonholed into doing something he doesn't enjoy simply because he's good at it and it's a means to an end since it's his only way of getting anywhere.

This gets expanded in dr2. Imposter's dissatisfaction with having to always be someone else. Akane not caring about being a gymnast much at all aside from the perks it gets her. Nagito's disdain for his luck talent that brings him constant misery while also acknowledging that it's the one thing about himself that he can count on the most.

It even becomes a focal point with Hajime, who did everything to fight his nature of lacking a talent. However, Chiaki points out that it's the fact that he has no specific talent that gives him more freedom than any of the ultimates that he admires. Turned out, gaining every talent put Hajime into his own prison, and it's his loss of personality that made him essentially useless.

Even in V3 you have Kaede who actually loves her talent so much that she feels like it's an obsession that affects her ability to socialize normally. Kokichi also seems to have brief moments where he acknowledges that his talent is a huge barrier to being able to actually connect with people and causes his loneliness, but decides that it's a compulsion that's too troublesome to change so he just accepts it.

Shuichi sticks out to me when it comes to this theme. He's extremely good at detective work and will often do it on impulse regardless of reward. However, even just stumbling on his first murder case and solving it before the police could even touch it, he could not cope with the results of the person he'd affected. His emotional sensitivity traumatized him into being avoidant, even using a hat as a literal blinder. He was prepared to die in the first trial in fear of revealing the truth. His compulsion to do detective work even kind of ruined Kokichi and Kaito's plot in ch5, as he got so ahead of himself with revealing the truth that just kind of blurted everything out before realizing that he shouldn't have. His compulsion with detective work even seems to make him comparatively calmer and more focused during investigations than the other protagonists, despite easily being the emotionally weakest-willed out of all of them. He repeatedly keeps falling back into his talent despite the emotional toll it has on him because he just can't help himself. He kind of acts as an example of one of the reasons why Kyoko was trained to be emotionally detached.

Jin actually is very much like Shuichi. He tries to actively avoid detective work because he despises the emotional detachment required for it. You wouldn't even know that he's actually really good at it, but you see glimpses into his skill in the novels where he'll end up figuring things out before even Kyoko does on more than one occasion. I can talk a lot about Jin, but I do get the feeling that one of the reasons why he works at Hope's Peak is because he knew more about what would end up happening there than he let on. He probably could have gotten quite a few things done if he wasn't so insistent on fighting his own nature as a detective.

Very honorable mention to Yui, who turned down an invitation to Hope's Peak for her high-jumping talent in order to pursue her passion as a very mid detective. She might've even lived if she went to Hope's Peak because I'm pretty sure she would've graduated by the time of the tragedy, but at least she died in the most based way possible by rejecting them.

And of course, Junko is a prime example of the detrimental effect of talent. Because of her analytical abilities, she can practically guess everything that's going to happen. Her obsession with despair is a desperate attempt at being mentally stimulated in a society that has let the status quo stagnate to such a critical degree that it's the reason why the very concept of talent had been rotted to this point. Sorry to Kodaka, who has repeatedly said that Junko is meant to be a truly evil villain with no motivation, but he did kind of accidentally give her a motivation in dr0 where we're shown for a fact that without her memories and ability to analyze, she's relatively normal and tame. That is her nature, just a kind of weird girl who wants to be a tradwife and go grow corn somewhere. However, I think it can be argued that what is meant by "pure evil with no motivation" is that she doesn't have any sort of tangible tragic backstory. You can even say it's not her analyst ability alone that caused her madness, since there's plenty of normal non-world-ending analysts. It may simply be that her personality happened to mix terribly with her talent, and that's the nature of what makes her pure evil, because both of those aspects of her are part of her nature that she can not (nor does she even want to) control despite the misery it causes her. She simply learned to love the misery.

Makoto himself is very clear about being bitter about his luck. For the most part, what's apparent to him is that it causes him constant trouble and the good that it actually does for him is so subtle and disjointed that he doesn't even realize it's his luck. However, I think what makes him different from people like Nagito or Junko is his personality. He doesn't obsess like they do, and his optimism makes him bounce back easily. I think his luck even feeds into his personality and, inverse to Junko, it's the unpredictability of his luck that makes him hopeful and optimistic. Since he never knows what's going to happen to him, he had to develop a way to roll with the punches.

The aspect of personality vs ability also carries over to rain code. The master detectives are people who have innate psychic abilities that are seemingly based on their nature, and then it gets refined and specialized based on their personality. Not only does their personality help to refine these powers, but you see that their personalities and abilities often have detrimental impacts on each other.

Halara can't see living things in their postcognition because they aren't good at looking at people. Pucci's ability makes her hearing so sensitive that it's at least partially caused her emotional detachment. Melami not only likes fashion so much that she must wear the clothes of someone to use her power, but she also has to actually like the clothes too. Vivia is constantly fatigued and has depressive tendencies due his tenuous attachment to his spirit.

Former Number One/Makoto are a great example of this sort of destructive feedback loop of cognitive dissonance. You can infer that their empathy and obsession with helping people is what gives them the ability to use coalescence and share anyone's abilities, yet it's the fact that they can do anything that makes them feel like they must do everything. Ironically, the fact that they've convinced themselves that they must do everything makes their ability essentially useless because they end up only working alone. As a result, Former Number One became detached with every emotion except for his obsession, and it's what caused Makoto to ultimately spiral.

[kakisocks]

A Master List of Rex/Anakin Fics

Every fic from my ao3 bookmarks that have Rex and Anakin together. There will be some polyamory in there with Padme or Obi-wan as a warning

I will be warning you if a fic ain’t complete I just don’t want to write out all the way, if polyamory is involved I will say with who and stuff. If there’s a trigger warning I’ll try to catch them here instead of not including them but I’m not perfect so be careful please.

Also unless stated otherwise, each fic is rexwalker and complete.

happy browsing :)

______________________________________________________________

Fluff

How To Care For Your Jedi (or, rex is a total softie).

What An Honor // What An Injustice

What’s in a Name?

Rumor Has It

Don’t Touch Mysterious Orbs (Obi-wan/Anakin/Rex)

Anakin has too Much Paperwork

After Battle Meditation (Rex/Anakin)

i’ll do anything you say (if you say it with your hands)

Poor Show

Short on Rations

A Credit For Your Thoughts

Give me just a few minutes to make this memorable for us both

Brother, Captain, King

within and without

the colors you press into my skin (Anakin/Padme/Rex)

Inside This Place Is Warm

Luminescent

Heartbeat

Wow, Rex actually knows his first name?

a midsummer day’s allergens

In Which Anakin Chickens Out

Perfect Opportunities Do Exist

Beauty Within a Storm

Orders Worth Listening To

Boba Has a Crush (On Rex’s Boyfriend)

In Which Panic Ensues (Padme/Anakin, Rex/Anakin)

In Which All Bets Are Off (A Bridge one-shot to the piece above, for funsies)

What Dreams are Made Of

The Clones have It Right With @fiveshasarrived (NOT Complete)

In Sheep’s Clothing

Free-Spoken

Nothing is Ever Simple with a Skywalker

In Which Anakin Avoids Rex

Hidden Harmony

Cigarettes and Liquor Bottles

______________________________________________________________

Smut

Fives Times Rex Kissed Anakin (& one time anakin kissed him).

The Clone’s Blaster

Belonging

when the snow falls we will wrap ourselves in furs (Anakin/Clones)

The Thing

your mouth on mine, your body against me

Hundreds of Warriors [For Me] (Anakin/Clones)

I ache for the touch of your lips, dear

Good Men Follow Orders

When the Seperatist’s make a new bomb.

Priorities

afterglow (Obi-wan/Anakin, Anakin/Clones)

______________________________________________________________

Whump

i’ve lost the will to go on (please shine a light to guide me home)

A Pile of Anger

You Will Be Safe in My Tender Embrace

Splintered

Tom’urcir

Odd Comforts

Words That We Couldn’t Say

There Is No Slavery In The Galactic Republic

dying to fight, fighting to die (Padme/Anakin, One-sided Anakin/Rex)

you are absent of cause or excuse

Rex and Anakin Raise a Family (NOT Complete)

In Sickness and Health. But Especially Sickness

Liberation and Vows

Get me off this planet

Remembering one last time

I will come as soon as I can

War Changes What We Are Willing to Do

Learning the past to move forward

I could not protect you in the past, but I can in the future

waiting on the next storm

I’ll Carry You Home Tonight

The Sense of Me in Obstacles

Roll the Dice

Twin Blasters (Anakin/Padme/Rex)

you can’t win alone  (Anakin/Padme/Rex)

Of Rain, Tears, and Freedom

Of Secretes and Misunderstandings

______________________________________________________________

Miscellaneous

Calling in Reinforcements

Not a Jedi Be

There’ll Be A Light In The Hall If You Ever Come Back (NOT Complete)

The Elements of Falling in Love (While Your Parents Plan a Coup)

Shiny Rainbow Knife (Trans MTF Anakin, Anakin/Rex)

Aladdin rexwalker

When A Good Man Goes To War (rename of Fix-All Sith!Anakin AU)

Human Pleasure Droid (NOT Complete)

The Way to a Boy’s Heart is Through Violent Defensive Maneuvers

Marked from the First

I can’t go back and loose it all (Anakin/Rex/Padme)

Helping hand

[weirdestbooks]

Secrecy and Deception Chapter 15

The Two Koreas (Wattpad | Ao3)

Table of Contents | Prev | Next

Event: Korean War Begins

Location: Pyongyang, Democratic People’s Republic of Korea

Date: June 25, 1950

The Democratic People’s Republic of Korea knew that the unification of his country with the country to the south would happen eventually. Both sides wanted reunification, so it only made sense that it would come eventually.

But with two countries and two countrypeople, it made sense that reunification was going to get…complicated, to say the least. Korea didn’t think it was going to be easy, especially because his country father, the Soviet Union, was concerned that the southern countryperson was under America’s control.

That wasn’t Korea’s primary concern. The southern countryperson, being America’s country child, was no different from the Soviet Union being his country father. The problem with the southern countryperson lay in the fact that his half-sister was the new Japan.

It would be an insult to the Korean people and all they had suffered for their new, united countryperson to be related to the daughter of the monster that had tried to wipe them out. 

Korea was sure the southern one understood that and would be willing to give him the right to be the unified government.

At least, he was until he heard the news about what was happening at the 38th parallel.

“South Chosen did what?” Korea exclaimed, shock flooding through him as he stared at the messenger that had just brought him news from his human father, Kim Il Sung.

“Their forces attacked Haeju,” the messenger said, panic in his eyes, “We have counter-attacked in response to this, but…”

Korea nodded as the messenger trailed off, clearly at a loss as to what to say.

“Thank you for telling me this. You can go now,” Korea said. The messenger nodded and left the room. As soon as he did, Korea let the fear he felt show on his face.

He knew…he knew his human father had been preparing for the eventuality of war; it would have been foolish not to, with the rising tensions in the world, especially between the Soviet Union and the United States. 

But Korea had been clinging to the hope that reunifying his land and people would have been a peaceful occasion, with a lovely ceremony where he could talk to his southern half, his brother through their country mother, the Korea that outlived her captor. He had hope that, even though one of them was fated to die, they could find a nice place to sit together, and whichever one was fated to die would do it peacefully.

He…he didn’t want this.

He didn’t want war. But war came anyway. So soon after their freedom, after their births. So soon after they were created, they had to fight—not even against their oppressors but against each other.

Korea didn’t want this.

But he would have to fight for his people, for everything they had done for him, and to honor the promise he made to protect and look after them until his time was up. 

Korea didn’t know where things would go from here. Would he lose and die? Would the Southern one lose and die? Would this end in reunification?

Who knew?

Korea wasn’t a violent man. He hated the idea of raising arms against anyone, let alone his brother. He…he cared about his brother. I guess he thought his brother cared about him.

Maybe his brother thought he was better because he actually got to meet their mother. Did he think that made him superior, made him more qualified to be the country for their people? The fact that he got to meet their mom!

Faintly, Korea realized he was crying.

He was quick to wipe the tears away. Now was not the time to show weakness. He needed to be strong, for his people, for his family.

Who knows what his brother is thinking? Did he want this? Was he involved? Or was he kept in the dark? 

Korea didn’t know. 

He was starting to realize he didn’t know a lot about the world.

To be fair to himself, he was only a year old and had a few more months until he turned two. Maybe…maybe this was how things were. Maybe this is why the Soviet Union always seemed so sure that war would come.

Maybe he was just foolish to hope that there would be peace, or maybe he was just a child who didn’t understand the world.

Korea hoped that those assumptions were wrong. He wanted to believe that he could contribute to a better world.

He just hoped the world was willing to give him that.

• ───────────────── •

Event: Red Scare

Location: Washington, District of Columbia, United States of America

Date: July 20, 1950

America had more trouble sleeping than he usually did these days. Worry, concern, and paranoia ate away at him when he was left to his own thoughts, and once again, America turned to alcohol in an attempt to drown out the loudness of his thoughts. 

It didn’t help. Not really. But America drank anyway because being without it was worse than any of the side effects it came with.

James tried to stop him. He destroyed the booze America had saved (although he hid the more expensive stuff. The man might be a pain, but at least he was decent) and tried to take control whenever America started getting far in his cups. America still got around him. He drank at bars, bought cheap bottles, downed them quickly, and did his best to force his brother away.

It was the only thing that made him feel in control.

Senator McCarthy’s accusations hadn’t left his head either. 

America wanted to trust his children. He really did, but…he had thought a lot about things that had happened between them, how the South kept the Confederacy’s continued existence a secret from him, how they never planned to reveal it to him. Who knew what else they were hiding from him?

It wasn’t the only worry he had. North Korea had attacked South Korea, and the two were at war. America was involved because the USSR and the Red China were supporting it, and it was guaranteed to turn into a bloody mess.

Senator McCarthy was right in that America needed to keep a close eye on who he trusted, especially those who had burned him before.

“You’re right. We need to keep a close eye on Canada,” Rebecca snarked. America ignored her, both because he was in public, heading towards Senator McCarthy’s office and because he did not want to engage with her taunts. 

She and James were humans. They didn’t understand how countries worked, so of course, they would judge him for being cautious.

“America, I’ve lived in your head for my entire life. I know you. And I know this isn’t cation, but paranoia. That man is only making it worse. You need…America, you’re making your paranoia worse by doing this.” James said. America scowled, biting his tongue to keep him from responding.

“Hello, Senator McCarthy. Good to see you again,” America said. A small part of him knew James was right, that going to these meetings wasn’t something he needed to do, but he still did anyway.

America didn’t know what was wrong with him.

“It's good to see you, too. I didn’t know if you could make it, considering what is happening in Korea right now,” Senator McCarthy said. America shrugged.

“It’s complicated. I want to be there, but politics are politics,” he answered. Between the UN and the risk of another war in Europe, if they provoked the Soviets too much, America was sitting this war out. 

That wouldn’t stop his states from getting involved, but at least he was out of it.

“Yes, and with the ongoing war, I have some concerns about Hawaii,” Senator McCarthy said. America raised an eyebrow, wondering what it was now.

“They always have concerns about Hawaiʻi. You’d think they were her parents,” Caleb said, and America could practically hear the man’s eye roll.

“Hawaiʻi is not going to run away to war,” America sighed, figuring that was the senator’s concern.

“Not yet,” Caleb chimed in unhelpfully.

“That’s not my concern,” Senator McCarthy said. America shot him a confused look. 

“Then what is?”

“Have you ever considered that Hawaiʻi could be a spy for the communists in Asia?” Senator McCarthy asked. America blinked, not expecting to come out of his mouth. “I mean, surely you knew this. After all, you knew during the Second World War that she couldn’t be trusted and put her under ma—”

“That martial law was declared unconstitutional, and I never agreed to it!” America said, quickly rising out of his chair. Sure, he and Hawaiʻi had their fair share of issues, but he would never do that to her, never authorize stripping her will from her.

“Didn’t stop you from using it, though,” James said. America’s scowl deepened. Barely! He just got her to stay out of it, to prevent her from hurting herself in a revenge scheme that would fail.

To keep him from losing her too. 

He had lost enough people to that empire. He wouldn’t lose anymore, not if he could help it. It was for her protection; surely even Hawaiʻi understood that. She looked too much like the enemy; she…she was better off on her islands.

It wasn’t that bad.

America knew that was a lie. But what else could he say?

“You can tell this senator that he’s a good-for-nothing son of a bitch who needs to—”

“Oh, Caleb. We get it. Calm down,” Rebecca said, smoothly cutting off the man’s angry rant.

“Ah, I apologize. I thought you were a part of that process,” Senator McCarthy said. America bristled. 

“I’m not.” 

Unless it was extreme circumstances, there was no way he was forcing someone through that. It was…

“It’s not a fun thing to be under,” James murmured. America almost nodded but caught himself just in time to prevent it from happening.

“But, still, she’s very Asiatic in character, and she’s not a state yet, so can you really be sure of her loyalty? The Philippines got his independence. What if she has been manipulated into thinking that the communist Asians will give her independence if she works for them?” Senator McCarthy proposed.

“Hawaiʻi’s been with us when we’ve been vulnerable before, like when we were in that hospital of hers, on so much morphine it was hard to think. You really think, if she wanted to hurt you, she would have left us alone then?” Caleb said, voice resolute in defense of his friend.

“Caleb makes a good point. I don’t think…Hawaiʻi cares about American Samoa, and she knows hurting us will hurt him. I don’t…I don’t think it’s in her nature.” Rebecca added. America bit his lip. While Rebecca and Caleb both made good points, Rebecca neglected to mention why Hawaiʻi cared so deeply for American Samoa.

Because he looked so much like Hawaiian-Samoan Confederation. Sure, Hawaiian-Samoan Confederation and American Samoa were only half-siblings through Ancient Samoa, but they shared many similar features.

Hawaiʻi loved American Samoa because he looked like her dead child.

A child America had killed.

He didn’t mean to, and it would always sit up there in his list of regrets, the blood that strained his hands (like New England Confederation and New Sweden and, oh god, what had he done). He knew he would never be forgiven for those sins.

If Hawaiʻi really was spying for communist nations in order to get her independence…America couldn’t really blame her. He had…he had cost her a lot in an effort to make things better for her. Hawaiʻi had good reasons to be mad.

“She does. And she also deserves her freedom,” Caleb said.

“I will trust her. She deserves it, after all she has gone through due to the Second World War and martial law,” America said. The fate of her child would remain a personal regret.

“Are you sure? You could just have her followed; make sure she’s truly American, and once we are sure she can become a state, you’ll have an easier time with her loyalty.” 

“Maverick, if you even think about it, I swear I will destroy your good booze!” James snapped almost immediately. 

“Hawaiʻi doesn’t deserve that after all the propaganda bullshit and what martial law did to her, and you know it!” Caleb added.

“And she’ll never trust you if you don’t trust her,” Rebecca added, “Trust me. I know.”

“I don’t want to control her like that,” America said. Senator McCarthy frowned some. 

“Well, if you are sure. But if you ask me, using her statehood to ensure loyalty isn’t a form of coercion. It’s more akin to family loyalty and ensuring she’s happy and safe, not being manipulated by the Commies in her state. But the decision is entirely up to you. I just wanted to give a suggestion.” Senator McCarthy said. America looked away, biting his lip as he thought it over. 

He…he couldn’t. But something told him that Senator McCarthy was going to press the issue until he answered.

"I'll...think about it and get back to you,” he eventually said before turning to leave, pulse racing.

For some reason, he felt panicked and lightheaded, although that could just be because of how close James and Caleb were. He needed…he needed a drink.

Preferably a strong one.

• ───────────────── •

Event: Red Scare

Location: Salt Lake City, State of Utah, United States of America

Date: November 18, 1950

Utah was used to being deaf. He knew many of his siblings expressed sorrow for him and thought that his deafness had ruined his life. Utah thought it was a bit of an overreaction. While he missed some things, like music, hearing church sermons, and listening to the sounds of his family, being deaf had not changed that many things for him.

He could still do much of what he had done before, even if he now spoke a language very few people seemed to know.

But that was what Paul was for. Paul was his translator, translating Utah’s signed speech into spoken word and then spoken word into sign for Utah, making his life much easier. 

Paul had also become a friend, a requirement Utah had decided on when the idea of an ASL translator for him first came about. Utah didn’t want to be taken advantage of, to have things mistranslated to further someone else’s agenda, to be tricked and deceived because he was the poor little deaf LDS state. So, if the translator was a friend or someone Utah trusted, he could rest safe in the knowledge that things were being translated correctly.

Paul was also eager to keep Utah updated with any radio reports he heard about Utah since Utah could not hear the reports himself.

This meant that Utah was prone to visits from his friend at odd hours of the day. The hardest thing about being deaf to Utah was being unable to hear when someone was at his door. Luckily, his dog, a German Shepherd named Albert, always got stirred into a tizzy by someone at the door, which clued Utah in on the fact that someone was there.

He really needed to figure out a better system for that.

Utah had gotten Albert under control and put the dog in his bedroom before answering the door, smiling as he saw Paul standing there. However, the smile faded as he saw the worry on Paul’s face.

“What’s wrong?” Utah signed, not liking that expression. It never meant anything good had happened. Paul raised his hands and quickly began to sign.

“McCarthy went onto a radio station and accused you of being communist,” Paul explained. Utah blinked before opening the door wider, inviting Paul in.

“Explain everything you know,” Utah signed, the useless bee wings on his back buzzing with his nerves.

“McCarthy went on a radio station to say you are a communist and that you shouldn’t be trusted as a personification until an investigation is done into your life to prove you can be trusted,” Paul signed. Utah scowled.

“I can’t hear, and they think I am spying for our enemies? That is dumb. I would make a bad spy,” Utah said before groaning as a realization hit him.

McCarthy didn’t care that Utah was deaf. He was attacking Utah because he was LDS.

“I am not sure how many people will believe him, Utah, but it might be hard to shake the allegations,” Paul said. Utah sighed.

“Don’t translate anything anyone asks me about being communist. We’ll just use my deafness to my advantage,” Utah signed, shooting Paul a cheeky smile.

Paul grinned.

“I’m okay with that.”

• ───────────────── •

Event: Red Scare

Location: America’s Home, The Land In-Between

Date: December 19, 1950

Some days, it was hard to hold his head up. Tiredness fogged his brain, making it hard to think and making his limbs heavy and immovable.

The others were getting upset with that, trying to convince him to sleep, to not focus on the accusations of communists, to the parasites that could be living within him, and instead focus on taking care of himself.

Didn’t they get it? Didn’t they get that this was how America was taking care of himself? He was the country—their body was the body of a countryhuman. If his government were full of traitors and spies, their body would suffer. This was the best way to take care of himself.

“Dad?” 

It took America a few seconds to process the voice from behind him, but as soon as his brain registered the voice behind him, he jumped slightly before turning around to see his son, South Carolina, standing there. 

His expression looked concerned, his shaggy hair covering part of his face as he stood in the doorway. He was staring at America, and dimly, America realized he hadn’t responded.

“Go to bed.” Someone murmured. America shook his head, doing his best to give his son a grin.

“Hey…Southie,” he said, words slurring together through his heavy tongue.

“Dad, when was the last time you slept?” South Carolina asked. America couldn’t remember, but that wasn’t important. He didn't need to sleep when he had the threat of parasites tearing him apart to worry about. Faintly, he could hear James’ voice, but his foggy brain was unable to make sense of what he was saying.

“I’m fine. I have to handle this stuff.” America said, rubbing one of his eyes, forcing down a yawn.

“Dad—” South Carolina tried to argue, but America cut him off, feeling his anger grow, feeling him reach a breaking point. He was so tired of everyone telling him what to do, telling him how he should feel about the communists in his country! He was so exhausted from it all. 

Why couldn't he just be left to himself?

“I’m fine! Leave me alone! Or are you working against me, too? Do you want to hurt me again?” America said as he stood up, ignoring how his body swayed slightly and how black dots appeared on the edges of his vision.

South Carolina reached out and grabbed his arm.

“Dad, please," he said. As the black dots multiplied, his lightheadedness grew. His body grew heavy, and he felt his eyes slide close before his body pitched forward, and everything faded away.

• ───────────────── •

America heard voices speaking in low murmurs. His body was heavy, and his mind was full of a pleasant fogginess. He didn’t want to move; he wanted to sink back into the foggy blackness. The voices were a soothing lullaby, slowly sending him back to sleep.

America felt a hand be placed on his cheek and leaned into the touch. It was cool to the touch and worked with the fog in his brain to steal away his senses.

It was too much effort to try and drag himself out of the fog, pull himself back to awareness, and figure out who the murmurs were. 

America was so tired. Sleep began tugging him down again, and America let it, the murmurs fading back into the fog as his limited awareness faded.

• ───────────────── •

Awareness tugged at Caleb slowly. He wanted to open his eyes, but the warm darkness kept trying to pull him back down, and it was so tempting to follow.

What had happened?

Caleb tried to piece his memories together, fuzzy sounds and warm, protective presence flashing through his mind before realization suddenly flooded his body. 

America had passed out. That idiot and his refusal to sleep and finally caused their body to reach its breaking point. Just like they warned him it would. 

Caleb groaned and tried to open his eyes again, finding it hard but not impossible. The light was painful against his head and just intensified the feelings of exhaustion. 

Caleb looked around, seeing he was in their bedroom, tucked under the covers with America’s glasses and a cup on the table. Caleb grabbed and put the glasses on, clearing up his blurry vision. He then began to sit up in the bed, rubbing at his forehead before yawning.

“Anyone else here?” Caleb asked. His head felt strangely quiet.

“Cabe? That you?” he heard Warwick’s familiar voice ask. 

“It’s me. America…his lack of sleep finally got to us,” Caleb said before the door opened, revealing Massachusetts, whose eyes widened upon seeing Caleb.

“Father! You’re awake!” the commonwealth said with a smile, rushing over.

“It’s Caleb. How long have we been asleep?” Caleb asked, waving off Massachusetts’ apology. He knew that Massachusetts hadn’t meant it. 

“About a day…Cabe, Father’s in a bad spot right now, isn’t he?” Massachusetts asked, his voice going gentle. Caleb nodded.

“He is. All this communists in the government stuff is getting in his head. He’s…he’s real paranoid. Convinced even some of you may be out to get him.” Caleb said, deciding not to name names there. Better that some of the states don’t know how far into his paranoia America has fallen. 

Massachusetts frowned, worry in his eyes.

“We got to get him to snap out of it. Caleb…how do we do that?” he asked. Caleb shrugged, feeling uneasy. This wasn’t his area of expertise. 

Something told him America wasn’t going to relax until he felt safe and in control.

[indignantlemur]

hello, I was wondering what your head cannon was on the ahm tal? Also may I ask what your head cannon was, if I didn't already, about the andorians in the andorian incident?

Thank you.

Hello again! <3

We'll start with the Am Tal, I think. This is another long one, so details below the cut.

PART 1: The Am Tal

The Am Tal (or Ahm Tal) is effectively the Andorian secret service - their equivalent to the Romulan Tal Shiar, the Vulcan V'Shar, and Earth's Section 31. Canon lore on them is sparse, naturally, but what is there tells us this:

The organization was founded in 1935 on the Andorian colony world of Cimera III. After the founding of the United Federation of Planets, the Am Tal often collaborated with Starfleet Intelligence and the Federation Intelligence Service, both officially and behind-the-scenes, but at all times the Am Tal operated independently of both. Am Tal agents working black-ops would sometimes pass on information to those more visible agencies as "anonymous sources." The Am Tal did not confine their activities to Andorian territory, contrary to what Federation Intelligence Services/Starfleet Intelligence once believed. They performed whatever operations were deemed essential to the welfare of Andoria and her people throughout the Alpha and Beta Quadrants, up to and including black-ops and wet work. They were regarded as brutally efficient, ruthlessly determined, and they were feared almost as much as the Tal Shiar. A "boogeyman" among the intelligence services, foreign spies, double agents, terrorists and others they deemed as threats would simply "disappear" when the Ahm Tal were around. Andorian citizens often attribute such incidents to the Ahm Tal, and they are often right. [sources: Alpha and Beta canon; LUG: The Andorians: Among the Clans, All Our Yesterdays: The Time Travel Sourcebook; Decipher: Aliens]

We also have an excerpt of a fantastic speech from LUG: The Andorians: Among the Clans from a politician regarding the Am Tal. As I harvest canon lore from multiple resources and try to make the jumbled mess make sense, I don't strictly adhere to ATC's lore, but I've always loved this detail:

"I think it tragic that we deny the existence of the Am Tal simply because the Federation doesn't understand what the Am Tal is. They are the most valorous heroes of our age. They die, silently, by the hundreds, saving our lives, protecting our freedom, defending our honor. They mutilate themselves for us. They focus their passion toward noble results. We should honor them. We are not obligated to explain them. Their real names must never be known." - Oshuvas Idrani, public address, Tarsk, 2268 They are noted scientists. They are wealthy merchants. They are adventurous pirates. They are Starfleet officers. Am Tal operatives are everywhere, the "seekers of secrets" and the sworn protectors of Andorian interests. The [Andorian government] denies their existence, despite the fact that 100 members are Am Tal and that the other 200 not only believe in them but want them shut down. [source: LUG: The Andorians: Among the Clans "Am Tal: The Art of Secrecy"]

Starfleet Intelligence does not manage to confirm the existence of the Am Tal beyond rumour and hearsay until the late 24th century - TNG era, that is.

To help put all of this in context, in Emigre the current year as of the most recent chapter (Ch 47) is 2174.

From this we can conclude a few things.

The Am Tal are very good at what they do. Despite the fact that the average Andorian citizen is well aware of the Am Tal as an entity protecting Andoria's interests, Starfleet Intelligence (and the Federation Intelligence Services branches) can't pin them down for at least another hundred years. That is some impressive operational security from the Am Tal's side of things.

Am Tal operatives are perfectly willing to undergo radical surgeries, including removal of their antennae, for deep cover operations - regardless of whether or not these procedures are reversible. They cultivate a ruthlessness and cold efficiency in their operatives that, frankly, sounds a hell of a lot cooler than Section 31 ever did.

Am Tal are spread throughout the quadrant and have an extensive spy network. They sometimes leave 'anonymous tips' for Federation Intelligence Services (FIS) and Starfleet Intelligence (SI) when they catch wind of something outside of their purview that the Federation might want to look into. No word on whether that courtesy extends to the Vulcans at the time of Emigre, however.

Anyone could be Am Tal. They're not all super soldiers or secret agents slinking about in highly visible uniforms, and their propensity for radical cosmetic alterations means that they slip under the radar with shocking ease. In short, literally anyone anywhere could be an Am Tal informant or operative, and there really isn't a good way to tell for sure.

From there my headcanons are as follows:

The Am Tal are a vast and far-reaching network of spies, informants, assassins, deep cover operatives, and citizens from all walks of life. They recruit anyone, regardless of Clan or status, who can meet their stringent requirements for loyalty, ruthlessness, and competence, and who are willing to make the sacrifices necessary to serve Andoria.

There are many different kinds of Am Tal operatives as well, and a broad array of skills are required to serve Andoria and her people. Not every operative is a fierce warrior or possesses genius-level intellect, though the organization will certainly go out of its way to recruit such individuals if it can. Their ranks include merchants, scientists, engineers, freighter captains, shipyard workers, domestic service employees, clerks, media specialists, and more.

The Am Tal do not as an organization shy away from black-ops and wet work when it's needed, but it is not their first choice for dealing with problems. Their biggest priority is actually information-gathering, collation, analysis, and dissemination. A wealth of knowledge - particularly knowledge no one else wants one to have - wins wars as surely as a knife in the dark can topple nations. Moreover, dead men tell no tales and while death is certainly an option, Am Tal would much rather extract every ounce of information possible first before considering more final alternatives. They're not always picky about how they go about this, but finesse over brute force is the Am Tal's preferred modus operandi.

Part of the reason behind Am Tal's success is their operatives' willingness to do whatever it takes to preserve their covers. If they even suspect they're at risk of discovery, they disappear - and with their propensity for surgical alterations, quite effectively at that. Faking their own deaths is common, especially to estrange themselves from relatives who might pose problems in the future. In extreme circumstances, compromised operatives will self-terminate in such a way that their bodies and identifiers are destroyed as completely and thoroughly as possible. This is meant as a last resort only, and officials within the Am Tal are careful to neither condone nor discourage the act.

During the Earth-Romulan War (2156-2160), the Am Tal had limited success in gleaning information about Romulans, which was more than anyone else in the Federation had managed - but even so, it was hardly anything at all. Their file on Romulans and the Romulan spy network is threadbare at best in the current year, but it's all the Federation has to work with beyond the Enterprise incident reports.

The file, such as it was, was left anonymously on the Section Chief of Starfleet Intelligence's desk early one morning. Upon the isochip's discovery, the security footage or digital logs for the entire building were pulled, but upon review there was simply nothing there that shouldn't have been. Everyone involved agreed that the footage and records must have been tampered with, but no one could figure out how.

There are a number of Clans on Andoria (and its colonies) which have some association or another with the Am Tal, but not one of them have a provable tie to the shadowy organization. Rumour and hearsay at best are all that countless investigations have turned up. That doesn't stop the general population from making a few assumptions, however - better safe than dead is a rule to live by, on Andoria. Clans that have garnered such a reputation are generally treated with caution, since one never quite knows *who* exactly they are speaking to once Am Tal factor into the equation, but so long as the Clan's members are law-abiding citizens that's as far as it goes.

PART 2: The Andorian Incident!

The Andorians in the Andorian Incident are Commander Thy'lek Shran, Thon, Keval, and Tholos. As far as I know, we're never given the ranks of the other three, but I suspect Tholos was possibly a lieutenant.

Generally speaking, I have a few headcanons about these four, but I haven't really sat down and fleshed them out properly.

Shran is the most well-fleshed out character, having gotten the most screen time of the bunch. Where he's concerned, I mostly have headcanons about his departure from the Andorian Imperial Guard and subsequent poor lifestyle choices from a man who previously had been shown to be a competent and reasonable commander and negotiator. Something about that doesn't quite track, for me. It's generally agreed that he left the Guard out of guilt and shame for the fate of the Kumari, though I don't believe anyone else blamed him necessarily. The Marauder was a nasty piece of work, specifically designed to be a ship-killer, and it wasn't anything that anyone else in the quadrant had run up against before. It would have taken a miracle to save the Kumari once Shran's ship was the last one standing after the initial ambush. Certainly, there would be repercussions for the loss of the Andorian ambassador and the rest of the complement, but I don't think those repercussions would have been Shran's to bear, at least not entirely. He not only survived but saved as many of his crew as he could - and, more importantly, he lived long enough to negotiate a treaty in the ambassador's stead and be debriefed, despite his recklessness in his grief and the diplomatic shit-show that was the ushaan duel. The man has insane luck in the worst way - he has a weird tendency to be in the right place at the the right time, usually while he's also up to his antennae in problems and active firefights.

Tholos seems to be Shran's second in command, and he seems very comfortable following Shran into potentially volatile situations, from P'Jem to Corridan. That alone makes me think the two have known each other for years, or at least served together long enough to build up trust in the other's instincts. I headcanon Tholos as Shran's chief of security on the Kumari. Now, Tholos gets a bad reputation for creeping on T'Pol during The Andorian Incident which... fair. I personally think that the threats were empty, because something about Tholos' tone and word choice makes me think he's actually repulsed by Vulcans. His antennae, certainly, were not indicating any kind of fixation or arousal beyond sharp attention, which lends some credence to the idea that he was trying to provoke T'Pol, the other Vulcans, or the Enterprise landing party into giving something away. Since that didn't produce any of the desired results, he didn't bother with a second attempt, which a genuine creeper almost certainly would have. Remember that the Andorian squad was searching for evidence of a listening post, and as usual the monks were less than helpful. Provoking a response at this point - any response- would have been at least some kind of progress, since the Andorians had very clearly run out of momentum just as the Enterprise landing party arrived. Don't get me wrong - still creepy as fuck, but the possibility of tactical creeping makes me think that Tholos is the sort to actively look for weaknesses to exploit, maybe even habitually. He very well could be the sort who turns this on his own friends at times, with keen observations and cutting words that have become almost second-nature. In short, Tholos is an asshole but he's not that kind of asshole.

Keval, by comparison, we only see operating scanners and helping to search the monastery, which makes me think he might be a tech specialist or possibly an engineer. He doesn't get much in the way of screen time but even so Keval doesn't appear to be impulsive and we don't see any indication of a cruel streak like we do with Tholos. I headcanon Keval as a more measured sort of man, more likely to step back to assess rather than leap forward and react. He might be on the quieter side, as Andorians go, of a thoughtful disposition otherwise. When he's not searching Vulcan monasteries for secret lairs, I imagine he's the sort to enjoy tinkering with the systems under his care to improve their yield and efficiency when he has time.

Thon is the one we know the least about canonically, as he has no dialogue and is kind of just... there. He participates in the firefight, follows orders, and generally exists in the background. I'd say probably part of the Kumari's security complement under Tholos' command. I like to imagine Thon as an easy-going sort of guy, when he's not on a mission to suss out super secret Vulcan spy lairs, though he's by no means a pushover - the sort to enjoy wilderness hikes and hitting local dive bars.

[chiss-ticism]

hiiiii can i ask more about percy's pack? 🥺👉🏻👈🏻 what's the group dynamic like, what do they love and hate most about each other? or anything else you wanna share about them! i wish to perc(y)eive

Oh, yeah, of course! tysm for taking an interest 😭

A Not-So-Brief Introduction to the Pack :)

Sir Percival [Ventrue Antitribu] [Templar] [Pack Member]

Art beautifully crafted by @/belthegore - Survivor of the Week of Nightmares, Percival ["Percy" to friends and allies] is feverishly devoted to seeing the Sword of Caine's goals brought to fruition - his near death experience at the proverbial hands of the Antediluvian in conjunction with ~general~ Sabbat propaganda frying his brain in that regard. - He's principled in the sense that he's dedicated to Dominique Touraine's philosophy of 'Absolute freedom demands absolute responsibility.'. The Sabbat, in his eyes, are never going to achieve their goals if everyone is letting their base/Beast's desires control their every whim. There's a time and a place for indulging in such things and it isn't while they're actively fighting a war. - Doesn't necessarily understand the wanton violence some of the sects members engage in but is far from a stranger to violence himself. - Holding every Cainite in the highest of regards - seeing them as brothers, sisters, and siblings in Caine, he will willingly put his life on the line for any of them or even die for them if the situation calls for it [NOTABLY DOES NOT INCLUDE: Camarilla, Tremere, Giovanni, Setites, or any of the others on the Sabbat's laundry list of enemies]. More fanaticism. yadda yadda. - Adamant about sticking to preferred titles/epithets. "His excellency" for the Archbishop, "Grand Inquisitor/Reverend Sister" for the Grand Inquisitor, "The Dark Father" exclusively for Caine, so on so forth. - Kind.

Judith Margolis [Brujah Antitribu] [Ductus] [Black Hand]

- Also referred to as "Judy", "Moody Judy", or "M.J." - A member of the Black Hand. - A scholar of the Convention of Thorns even before she defected, Judy had always been Sabbat sympathetic - even during her nights of holding fairly decent sway within her domains' local Anarch Movement on account of her Bloodline and how much of a vocal proponent of direct action she was. Convinced that the Anarch Movement wasn't doing all it could to combat the Camarilla, she took the fight directly to them: finding herself being bloodhunted out of town for having made attempts on the Brujah and Ventrue Primogen's lives. She diablerized the Brujah Primogen directly, but the Ventrue got away one haven and a handful of bodyguards shorter. - - The Brujah was probably a set-up: having taken advantage of their good will/willingness to hear out members of the clan. Have a trusted insider set up a meeting, go in their place, profit. Conspirators didn't know she was planning on diablerizing them - maybe Final Death'ing to make a point but not diablerie. They balk at the idea, turn on her, and report the crime to one another. The Ventrue would've probably been an attempt to maximize the damage on the way out of town, eventually ending up as a failed break-in attempt that resulted in the haven getting torched but not the Primogen themselves - I rather like the idea that, during modern nights, she ingratiates herself with the local Anarch communities and scouts them out for potential recruits when such a thing is feasible/allowed - She's just as focused on taking out the Camarilla as Percy is, though tangibly less… [gestures vaguely at how willing Percy is to take one for the team]. - Dresses like evil Jesse Pinkman. Baggy pants, beanies, and hoodies galore. All variations of red and black - 5'5'' - Brown hair, dark brown eyes - Physically Late 20s, early 30s

Ida Obertus [Former Revenant, Tzimisce] [Pack Priest] [Children of the Dracon - scholarly wing (Akoimetai)]

- Shortest member of the pack at a solid 5'2'' - Born and Embraced in Montreal - She and Percy are both on the Path of Honorable Accord - Former Revenant, upon being Embraced she kept the Revenant Weakness [OCD] in addition to the regular clan weakness. - While she's perfectly capable of defending herself or reveling in sanguine succor if the situation calls for it, Ida is probably the only member of the pack that isn't on a martial bent. She prefers the time she gets to spend locked away with ancient tomes or helping prep for the Sword of Caine's festivals to, say, engaging in War Parties or the Wild Hunt. - Barring Noddism, of which she and Luther have [good naturedly] debated one another about the semantics of for hours on end, her expertise in life veered toward [supernatural] quirks of the blood: Ghouls, Revenants, trying to figure out what on earth a changeling is and why their blood is allegedly fucked up when they aren't visibly distinguishable in the slightest from everyone else, etc. etc. It would've been to help with the family's whole [gesturing vaguely at usurping humanity] even if she doesn't care about any of that now. - She would love to get her hands on a Lupine's corpse for study but, for a plethora of reasons, it's extremely Unlikely. The handful of times the pack has been Dog tagging they trend towards leaving the damnable creature where they found it - Ida, without fail, asking a one (1) time if she can bring it back to the haven. M.J., without fail, will pretend to humor the idea and put a pin in the conversation with a resounding "No." - She's significantly younger than Luther in age, but also lower than him in Generation [9th]. Both of them are ancillae. - She shut off her nerves via Vicissitude. Pain tolerance is through the roof - She has a personal "Grand Library" in her Montreal haven that she's left in the care of some of her former mortal family. While she keeps the volume entrusted to her from the Library of the Forgotten with her at all times, any books of note she can't cart around with her from domain to domain she sends back to them. - She has a singular Obertus revenant that she brings w/ her from domain to domain. He mostly tend to the haven's cleanliness (barring her own room which she insists upon doing herself) and aiding her in her studies. - - A distant cousin of hers, his name is Colin. - - Percy is polite but noticeably more distant than he is with other Cainites, Luther refuses to engage with him on grounds of his Path, and M.J. orders him around like a Pack Member with none of the benefits. - She knows [Latin, Byzantine Greek (For studying Constantinople), and French (She's from Montreal)] - She's friends with @/Styxnbones' Peona. Montreal Tzimisce buddies :) - She has Eidetic Memory, lending to her exceptionally high stats in the Knowledge Category (aided by the Grand Library she owns)

Ritae Ida Knows: - All 13 Auctoritas Ritae - Ignobilis Ritae: [Allegiance, Acceptance, Contrition, Stealth, and one she's developed for the Pack to use] I don't know if you can tell, but Ida is the one currently giving me brain worms :)

Luther 😎 [Lasombra] [Pack Member] [Caine's Goofiest Goober]

- Noddist scholar. Loves Caine^2 & took part of a now-forgotten ritus that marked his forehead with the Mark of Caine. Now has a "twisted form of true faith" from it. He can essentially use Noddist symbols to scare other vampires away :) - As mentioned, devout noddist now. He initially clung to the stories of Caine willingly forsaking the will of God and the Heavenly Host as comforting and growing to sympathize with the tragedy of the First City. He has these theories about Enoch being buried somewhere in the ocean, having been left there without hope of reclaiming it properly after the flood & wants to go looking but lacks support, time, and wet-suit. The Lasombra Antediluvian's vitae vaguely suggesting that he and some of his clanmates spend a little time with the sea/Mediterranean certainly doesn't help dissuade him from his dreams. - He loves a good practical joke, though, odds are that only he ever really finds them more than moderately amusing. Tough crowd the Sword of Caine are. I've likened him to Bugs Bunny before. - A cold draft always follows him wherever he goes. - Wears his sunglasses at night [He may look like a dork but he does have a valid reason to be wearing them :)] - He puts on a front of just being a Silly Little Guy who doesn't take anything seriously save for his pack and other ritae related to Caine himself. - Do not let him drive. - [he has more Tragedy in his backstory but it's not overly relevant atm :)]

Your Questions! :D

What's the group dynamic like?

-It didn't cross my mind when I was initially slotting puzzle pieces together for Ida, but Percy's bloodline ~generally~ started having issues w/ the Tzimisce as a direct result of his Methuselah diablerizing one in Constantinople. It's a complicated mess of pack dynamics/sins of the father/personal philosophies but I think Ida being a Dracon & sharing their general outlook/reverence for the time|domain: --Being the quieter members of their pack, they enjoy one another's company now-a-nights [I find the mental image of them reading their own niche books in the same room of the communal haven to be a nice one.] but those first few months of knowing one another were capital T tense. Ida, through other Akoimetai as study of Constantinople's vampiric history is ~tentatively~ a side hobby of hers compared to her other (k)nightly duties, was made aware of the Circumstances regarding the Methuselah and his bloodlines' general disposition toward the clan. The stress of the Week of Nightmares and the wounds therein would've been still been fresh for Percy as well. --Ida would prefer that the main clan -and everyone who abides by their rulings- would carefully dissect every choice they make and refrain from haphazardly damning the rest of the clan even further (for Percy it'd be dragging the whole sect down w/ them) further than they already are, playing devils advocate like the Children are want to do: make them consider the weight of their actions and consider the responsibility that intrinsically comes with as much sway as they do. Percy, on the other hand, is like. Yeah… Excellent points to make - we don't always have the luxury of deliberation, though. [this would've been less of a point of contention during the Gehenna War, mind, but she's probably started up again now that things have tentatively cooled down a bit.] --Percy + Ida: wanting the best for Cainites 'everywhere'

- ignoring the fact that Judy has considered hitting him with a car before, the pack wouldn't really be the same without Luther. 1 of the reasons he keeps up his funny little guy routine is that he recognizes that they'd all burn out without a little brevity in their unlives - being as overly focused on their individual goals as they are in a world where the Sword of Caine is in a particularly fragile state. He's happy to provide laughs (or someone to be frustrated with) if it keeps them from teetering on the edge.

- As the Pack Priest - and one who takes confession at that - Ida is probably the Cainite they confide in the most. Few secrets of personal relevance being kept between them (faction stuff is another story), she's the person they'd go to for, say, interpersonal advice or a friend to alleviate their mental woes with.

- Percy & Judy are on the war path, but their respective duties tend to take them away from the Pack for long bouts of time :(. Keeping tabs on one another isn't the easiest thing in the world either

What do they love most about each other?

They're all potently driven in their chosen fields of expertise, being able to talk about their interests for hours on end and provide one another with valuable insight they might've missed. Percy & Judy's combat practice, for example, can be expanded upon by Ida's occult knowledge when they're doggtagging. Luther [through adherence to the faith] & Ida [through being as well-read as she is] provide one another with new perspectives on Noddism anytime they talk about it, etc. etc.

What do they hate most about each other?

- That Percy and Judy are taken away so often [Ida never comments on it but it certainly doesn't feel Good when it happens]

- Judy's taste in music [Percy & Ida do not understand how people listen to Industrial metal. She introduced Luther to the Sisters of Mercy so he doesn't care all that much]

- Percy's staunch adherence to formalities. [Judy has asked him time and time again to just call her by her name]

- That Judy seems to place very little emphasis on the more secular aspects of the sect. [Luther -> Judy. She does believe in Caine, but she mostly joined up for a better chance at dealing with the Camarilla properly]

[insertsaddict]

Thinking about Emperor Zim, from issue #12 of the comics...specifically with an S/O in his story.

Consider, if you will, dating a Zim prior to him becoming Emperor. Things are good, life is good, Zim is evil but clearly has morals he isn’t willing to go against. You stay at his side.

But what about when he starts going against those morals? He “fixes” GIR to become a loyal servant, shoving down his personality. He seems increasingly more likely that he’ll outright kill Dib during one of their fights. He becomes more vicious, more willing to make sacrifices if it means pleasing his Tallest. You become worried.

At some point, he betrays his morals in such a way that he isn’t the Zim you started dating. Could be when he locks Dib up and seems content with leaving him to die without a fair chance of escape. Could be when GIRT is finally fully created, little to no personality left. Whatever that point is for you...you leave him before or soon after he becomes Emperor.

(Could be out of disgust for his actions, or maybe fear. After all, what point will you be a sacrifice he’s willing to make?)

Anyway, you might not have hope that Emperor Zim will ever be the Zim you knew and loved, but you know him. You know his strategies, how he thinks. You start resisting. Originally just helping people find freedom and safety, but eventually forming a group that actively works against the Emperor.

(The name of this group could be anything. Maybe ‘The Moths’, in honor of Agent Mothman/Dib, the first to fight against Zim.)

Naturally, you and your group of rebels are wanted by the Emperor, bounties on your head and everything. Interestingly, on all the wanted posters and announcements everywhere, everyone is wanted ‘Dead or Alive’...except for you. You, with the highest bounty, are wanted ‘Alive’.

And then, after maybe years of fighting the Emperor, you hear interesting news. News of Dib, alive...and of Zim wandering around without his Emperor regalia.

Naturally, you and your rebels meet up with the two of them. A quick conversation, and you learn that they’re from the past. Interestingly, Past Zim is now extremely determined to defeat his future self, complaining about how ‘old and un-Zim’ he is. You find yourself agreeing...and of course agree to ally with him and Past Dib to take down the Emperor.

Though Dib isn’t very thrilled, and several of your rebel friends are also displeased about working with what is, essentially, a younger version of the Emperor they’re fighting. But, even though the past Dib and Zim don’t yet know who you are (besides you being wanted by the Emperor), you defend Past Zim, trying to get everyone to work together against your common enemy.

It’s actually nice to interact with Zim from the past! Even though he clearly hasn’t met you yet in his own time. He’s not quite the Zim you grew to love, but he’s closer to that than the Emperor is.

But that doesn’t last long. After all—you, an escaped Dib, and an annoying past version of himself all in one place? Emperor Zim takes notice and launches an attack.

The rebels manage to fend off the attackers, but not without you being captured. You, Dib, and Zim were the main targets of the attack, after all. You’re dragged to the palace, brought face-to-face with the Emperor for the first time in maybe years.

Oh, he’s annoyed about the rebellion you started, and furious that the Dib from the past escaped him, but he isn’t going to punish you, he assures. After all, there was a reason you were wanted ‘Alive’!

Zim isn’t one to easily let go of what he cares about. He wants you to rule the world by his side. He’s already made you robes that match his, and a throne right beside his, and a crown that’s only a little bit smaller than his own!

And of course, security in the palace is immediately ramped up. Can’t have you escaping, after all.

Fortunately, it isn’t long before everyone launches a counter-attack—one last bid to stop him, save the planet, and rescue you.

Dib and Zim are at the forefront, naturally.

They burst in...right when the Emperor is giving you a rather passionate, possessive kiss.

Both react in horror, shock, and disgust, and the Emperor is enraged at being interrupted. But Past Zim...is also very intrigued. What made you so important to the future version of him?

Things continue the same way as the comics from there. A big fight that ends with Emperor Zim defeated, and the whole Earth being sent back in time to right after the Past Zim and Dib had left. But you do get the chance to say goodbye to Zim and Dib before everything is reset.

Neither entirely get all the answers they want from you, but in the end, they’re just satisfied they’re going back to their own time. With the Earth set back, everyone is left with little more than a few odd nightmares of the Emperor’s rule that are easily brushed off.

You, in particular, find yourself dreaming about a strange alien who gives you...mixed feelings. Love, anger, sadness, grief...but for now, it’s just dreams.

When Dib and Zim return to their proper time, Zim is determined that he won’t become as un-Zim as the Emperor...and that he’ll find you and figure out why his future self was so interested in you.

Dib is just as determined to stop Zim before he even has a chance to turn into the Emperor, and to find you before Zim does.

[youalmostcapturedjacksparrow]

𝕁𝕒𝕔𝕜 𝕊𝕡𝕒𝕣𝕣𝕠𝕨'𝕤 ℝ𝕠𝕤𝕖 ℂ𝕙𝕒𝕡𝕥𝕖𝕣 𝟙𝟛

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5 | Chapter 6 | Chapter 7 | Chapter 8 | chapter 9 | Chapter 10 | Chapter 11 | Chapter 12 | Chapter 13 | Chapter 14 | Chapter 15        

General POV.

'Go puppet! Walk the plank! ' You could hear the pirates scream at Elizabeth.

Will was trying to get loose of the grip the pirates had on him.

'Barbossa, you lying bastard!' He spat at Barbossa.

'You swore they'd go free!'

'Don't dare impugn me honor, boy!' Barbossa spat.

'I agreed she'd go free, but it was you who specify when or where. 'He told Will

'Though it does seem a shame to lose something so fine, ' He said with an smirk.

Looking at Elizabeth and then to Rose who was standing next to him. Held by 2 pirates.

He stroked his hand against her cheek. To which Rose turned her head away.

'So I'll be havin' that dress back before you go.' Barbossa said looking at Elizabeth.

Elizabeth turned towards Barbossa.

'Lizzy don't ' Rose begged. But she was already undressing herself in her underdress.

'Goes with your black heart.' Elizabeth spat at Barbossa while throwing him the dress.

'Ooh its still warm.' Barbossa smirked throwing the dress in the crew.

Elizabeth walked to the end of the plank. And looked at Will and then at Rose.

Rose gestured that she would follow her.

But before Elizabeth could turn around a pirate thought it took to long stomped on the plank which made Elizabeth fall.

Then they pushed Jack forward.

'I really rather hoped we were past all this.' He said.

Barbossa walked forward lying his arm around his shoulder.

'Jack. Jack.

Did you not notice. That be the same little island that we made you governor of on our last little trip.' He said looking towards the island.

'I did notice' Jack said while looking at the island and then turning around.

Rose looked up and listened towards their conversation.

So they're willing to bring him back to the same island they dropped him last time.

'That's Horrible ! ' Rose spat towards Barbossa and kicked the pirate behind her so she could walk forward.

' You really are a bunch of asshole's aren't you' Rose yelled at Barbossa.

She was almost with Barbossa when he turned around and grabbed her by her wrists.

'And you.. oh you Miss Rivers. Always a pleasure to see such a strong hearted woman. Sadly you need to wait a second you're after Jack' Barbossa said while throwing my wrists back down.

He walked towards Jack again.

'Perhaps you'll be able to conjure up another miraculous escape.

But I doubt it.

Off you go' Barbossa said while pointing his sword at Jack.

'Last time you left me a pistol with one shot.' Jack mumbled

'By the powers you're right.' Barbossa said.

'Where be Jack's pistol?

Bring it forward!'

'Seeing as their three of us. A gentleman would give us 3 pistols with 3 shots.'

'It'll be one pistol as before.

And you can be the gentleman Shoot one. And the other I'm not so sure about yet' Barbossa smirked at Rose.

Jack looked with frowned brows to Barbossa when he touched Rose.

But Barbossa smirked and threw his sword and pistol overboard.

Which made Jack jump after it.

Rose walked up towards the plank. But Barbossa pulled her back.

'I have a proposition to make Miss Rivers.

You're a fierce young woman. Which we could use in a crew like ours. ' He started.

'Shut up' Rose said. As she walked towards the plank.

'Are you sure Miss Rivers. We can offer you a lot. Especially your freedom. Because I can feel how trapped you were in your tight dresses and your spirit bound to marry a man who you don't love' Barbossa said smoothly.

Rose slowly backed her way up to plank. And looked at Barbossa.

She saluted him with a wink and then jumped off the plank.

They all moved towards the rail. And a crewmember yelled

'You can still change your mind y'know?'

'I'D RATHER DIE HERE BUT THANKS' Rose shouted back as she started to swim towards the beach of the island.

Rosemary's POV

I was crawling on the beach. Coughing to get air into my lungs.

Elizabeth was already there walking over to her. But Jack was quicker.

'Are you all right?' He asked me.

'Well how fine can I be?

I just wanted to save Elizabeth but now I'm here!' she looked around.

'Is there anything around here?' she walked past Jack.

Elizabeth was walking over to her and pulled her in a tight hug.

Elizabeth started crying and sank down to her feet. Rose felt herself lower to the weight of Elizabeth.

'Thankyou for coming for me' she chocked out.

'Always Lizzy' Rose smiled at her kissing her forehead.

Jack was walking around the beach. 'It's the second time I've watched that man sail away with my ship.' He sighed.

'I'm not going to kiss you to, if you think that's what I do ' I said to him.

After a while Elizabeth stood up and walked after him.

'You were marooned on this island before. We can escape in the same way you did then!'

Elizabeth shouted at him.

'To what point and purpose, young missy?' Jack spun around

'The Black Pearl is gone. Unless you have a lot of sails hidden in that bodice...

Which is unlikely..

Young Mr. Turner will be dead long before you can reach him. ' Jack said as he walked off towards a palm tree he was knocking on it.

'But you're Captain Jack Sparrow. ' Elizabeth said while holding that palm tree.

Jack was taking huge steps forward like he was counting something.

I looked up to them from the beach. I let Elizabeth say what she wanted to say I was thinking about what was all happening to me. But I couldn't help but giggle when I saw Jack take these huge steps. He looked like a mad man.

I walked up towards them.

'You vanished from under the eyes of seven agents of the East India Company.

You sacked Nassau port without a shot' Elizabeth complained to him.

Jack was now jumping on the ground where you could hear a squeak.

I walked up to them looking at the place he was jumping.

'What in the world' I asked myself.

'Are you the pirate I've read about or not?' Elizabeth said looking him dead in the eye.

'How did you escape last time' Elizabeth asked.

Jack sighed and pushed Elizabeth a few steps in front of him.

He was trying to say something.

'Last time I was here a grand total of three days. All right?'

Which made me choke on my own spit. 'Excuse me? So what Gibbs told were all ghost stories?'

I walked up to Jack who was now lifting up something on the ground.

'Let me explain Love' He said to me.

'Last time,

The rumrunners used this island as a cache.

They came by, and I was able to barter passage off.

From the looks of things, they've long been out of business' Jack said while walking down small stairs

'Probably have your bloody friend Norrington to thank for that. ' Jack said while pointing specific at Elizabeth.

'I don't blame you Love. I know you hate him.' He said winking at me. Which made me blush.

Elizabeth looked at me sheepishly and frowning. And I just shrugged.

Jack was holding a few bottles of rum up and I ran forward to grab them so he could get out.

'So that's it, then?' Elizabeth said.

'That's the secret of the grand adventure of the infamous Jack Sparrow!' She spat at him.

'You spent three days lying on a beach drinking rum.' She looked him straight in the eyes.

To which Jack look around.

'Is she always this scary?'

I shrugged 'neh'

'Well Welcome to the Caribbean love!' Jack said fake smiling and pushed a bottle of rum in her hands. And he walked over towards the beach.

'And you!' Elizabeth spat at me.

'Why were you even with him at the first place and what is that tension between you to!'

Elizabeth threw her hands up.

'he's a pirate Rose!? A Pirate!'

I sighed.

'I know I know. But do you know how hard it was to lose you, see the Black Pearl sail away with you on it. Instead of me.

Me and Will wanted to save you straight away. But Norrington wasn't having that. He was not planning on sailing out for at least three days!

3 DAYS ! Elizabeth!' I yelled at her.

'Will and I got desperate. And we found out that Jack was in the brig so we decided our best shot was to go with him.

And he has been nothing but kind to both me and Will!' I looked her straight in the eye.

'He has done more for you. Then Norrington ever will. And you know that just as much as I do.'

'So please! Elizabeth. Lets think of a plan tomorrow but for now. I would like to sleep and have a little bit to much alcohol in my veins!' I said as I walked past her towards the beach.

'Oh and also ' I walked back to her and gave her my coat.

'You're probably cold' I said with a soft smile.

'Now please come and take a nap or something Liz' I begged her.

-At night-

Elizabeth might have had a bit to much rum. I thought to myself.

She was only eighteen she had never more then a small glass of wine.

Elizabeth and Jack were dancing around the fire together singing.

When they were done they came over to me Elizabeth sitting next to her. Laying back in the sand.

She was asleep in a second.

Jack waved towards me signaling that I should come sit with him.

I looked over to Elizabeth and saw she was fast asleep before I slowly stood up.

I know noticed that I had quite a bit of alcohol in my veins.

I scooted towards Jack and let myself fall next to him.

'Is she asleep? ' Jack asked.

'Yeah she really is out' I replied to him.

'You know,' I started.

'You could have told me. That Gibbs his whole story wasn't true.

You just waited here and got lucky.

That's a whole different story' I said to him chuckling. While I wanted to take another sip out of my rum bottle but noticed it was empty.

I threw my bottle into the fire. Which made the glass splatter.

And I took Jacks bottle ' putting it to my mouth.'

'Yes I know. But I'm not the one who made that story up' Jack said smirking.

'And who am I to let them think otherwise'

I chuckled he was kinda right tho.

Jack took my bottle it was almost empty. As he wanted to put it against his mouth. I coughed.

'Maybe I wanted the last drop Jack?~ ' I said with a smirk.

He sighed but he did let go of the bottle and gave it to me.

I looked over at Elizabeth.

'Lizzie? Are you awake? Lizz?' I asked. No reaction.

'Good' I told myself I put the last bit of rum in my mouth. But I didn't swallow.

Instead I turned around and sat on Jacks lap.

I held his chin with my finger and parted his mouth a bit.

Then I kissed him but I let the rum slide in his mouth. I broke the kiss. Wanting to wipe the last bit of rum of my mouth and neck . but Jack stopped my hand and wiped the rum of with his finger licking it up. Then he went down my neck but this time with his mouth.

He lapped up all the bit of rum on my neck. But he didn't stop there.

'Well Jack~

I don't think I've had had enough rum for that' I said giggling while I pushed myself off him rolling next to him in the sand.

I heard Jack grunt. But he steadied himself. And laid down to.

We fell asleep shortly after.

[fortleegospel]

Gospel News

Dear friends and members of Fort Lee Gospel Church,

This week the weather is finally warming up in New Jersey. It has felt like a wet and cool Spring until now. While the official start of Summer is in a few weeks, this weekend kicks off the unofficial start of Summer. Here are a few reflections on Summer and Memorial Day:

Summer Season

While some dream of living in a warm climate so they can enjoy summer weather all year long, I prefer to live in a place like New Jersey where we have 4 seasons. Snow is beautiful, for a while. Spring and Fall have their own beauty and appeal. Summer is seen by many as the best time of the year (except Christmas).

We associate Summer with time off school, vacations, days at the beach, outdoor gatherings, and other fun events. It is rightly a season to build memories and take some breaks from work. Here are some biblical thoughts on a season of refreshment:

· Joy is an essential part of our faith.

You make known to me the path of life; you will fill me with joy in your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand. (Ps. 16:11)

You turned my wailing into dancing; you removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy, that my heart may sing your praises and not be silent. Lord my God, I will praise you forever. (Ps. 30:11-12)

Nehemiah said, “Go and enjoy choice food and sweet drinks, and send some to those who have nothing prepared. This day is holy to our Lord. Do not grieve, for the joy of the Lord is your strength.” (Neh. 8:10)

· Rest is a gift from God.

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” (Matt. 11:28-30)

And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast. To him be the power for ever and ever. Amen. (I Peter 5:10-11)

· We all need renewal:

He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength.

They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint. (Is. 40:29-31)

Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. (II Cor. 4:16)

He saved us, not because of righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy. He saved us through the washing of rebirth and renewal by the Holy Spirit, (Titus 3:5)

Enjoy your summer season and may you know God’s joy, rest, and renewal!

Memorial Day

Memorial Day remembers all those who have died in military service over the years. Veteran’s Day is the time to honor all who have served in our military.

Jesus said, “Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.” (John 15:13) While the analogy is not perfect, I do think of this verse on Memorial Day. The ultimate sacrifice was when Jesus went to the cross to die for our sins – the sinless Savior died for us as sinners. Jesus showed ultimate love for us by dying for us.

It is hard to imagine the generation of young men who willingly signed up to fight for our nation in World War II. There were countless stories of men lying about their age so they could go to war. The patriotism shown by that generation was profound. The conviction that they were willing to die for our nation and a just cause drove their patriotism.

I have had the privilege to know many local veterans who served our nation as the VFW has invited me to pray at their events. We are right to honor those who have served and remember those who gave their lives so that we can enjoy our freedoms.

On Monday, May 27th at 10:00 AM there will be a Memorial Day parade in Fort Lee, starting and ending at the Community Center. After the parade there will be a program remembering those who have served and died for our nation. A few of us in the clergy will be a part of the program. Please consider joining us as we honor those who died for our nation.

-Pastor Rick

Weekly Announcements

Sunday worship services at 11:00 AM continue to be livestreamed on our Fort Lee Gospel Facebook page, YouTube channel, and our website, www.fortleegospel.org. We meet in the building where we include a time of worship after the online portion of the service.

The Tuesday Men’s Lunch and study meets at the church at 12:30 PM.

The Tuesday Bible Study meets at 7:00 PM weekly. We are studying the book of Romans.

The 6:00 AM Prayer Meeting on Wednesdays and Saturdays is at the church with an option to connect on Google Meet.

The Women’s Bible Study meets this Saturday, June 1st at 2:00 PM. The study continues from the book of Ephesians. All women are welcome.

Connect info for Tuesday Bible Studies and Morning Prayer is:

Meeting URL :

https://meet.google.com/suk-xpsf-nwh

[libidomechanica]

And smote himselfe in

Before Salámán listen; and,     once come to know the sparrow in the bitter wind where its     wrecks like to this, all honor’s mimic, all wealth, the name! At     least begin revision fleeting, and Lilia first: the     whole field; and thou break, to

let base clouds o’ertake me trembled     in the whole empress something made head, his scull will prop it     under cloud cover, dry where you once again; loves and the     temple, saying, now a twisted, crisp’d, and mire, scheming     imagined more fit; I

do confess? Once I did I never     seems the luver’s finger- tips: her kind of shame. While the     old snows; suppose that won you to dissemble, without pause!     In lovely Nature’s sharpest pangs o’erflow’d with this strange the     whirl was wont with slaughters

of late: suppose, but, in good faith,     some boy would tell of a Celestial Beauty, or the wicket;     babies, as ugly as a winter’s dart. With thee! The     superior, in a stranger and taxing,—how, I say,     There is no one toil for

breath is dead. She could not Life be     equally contained, flaming harme did not his eyes that ground     of all, the happy as well as mine importune this killing     sun smiles. And smote himselfe in thy peculiar Eye—and     least part of my love, aside

to harvest. Juan much bigger     than the sweet heaven’s limbs: there and hours in me, till all from     love’s picture then tell me there the crystal moon, the simmer     moon; not thou ever seems to dependent on whether young     green access out of, and

winged reeds, and one discussed his despair!     Me—me, the sword of all her then, as in a fair and     view, are loth to mount, and mark the sepulchre, She remembering     flowers gather’d’ as subject bound on either to spin it     into flakes of short-number’d

lay, of beechen green, a page     or two from year to me: forsaken and malformation     If you ain’t watch’d the smiles. The little flower, and at her     Harmony. Were none but these—what kind of love of one day     see both love, sustaining

sleep. Tell me not for such one day:     they’re given as Gods, be wise. Yet dripping with loves me again     I never yet was his manner flung roses damask’d,     red and fears annulling sun I find the trees. That is for     thee, my Philly? The chief

art in high and build far off, with     your mother to make thou, cried Urania; in such melodious     passion willed, freedom a drug that’s bought with rhyme, to     war and the wounds with the seasonable month endows the     great outdoors we heard the

meadow, and quarter ere his face     I say, There is not so the honey. Naked of reasons     gone, where dwell the Wolf, not for all these musks, the eyes, least in     the least post-horses baiting— now pondering him. Her eyebrows     of honest eyes can

your gate a slice or two. Past the     all-cloudless glory they expire! Till pudding name! But therein     she cried: The devil laughed some yet live, in love with fur     in a ring, cold doth live, treading its orbit, each heavily     he answer’d not, but

of thy days, making up again.     Learn to speechless light glares and scar’d the Soul in Strife! Questions     we now entertain of any other have I yet the     Past, his fair and fair your bones supersede loveliness,     and I unremark’d the

summer eves. Many have you all?     Make thee on a bank and deer, his owne children cry, they’re not     any. Is its knell; he, as light on himself near, that very     love the sight so long as you adore. Will fly to thine     happier they most dear;

but blythe’s the crowd, the laws of     every land! And winding sickle’s coming him to his Heart;     another die. I wish not that, amassing flood; thrall, or     at the wardrobe which few men’s days dragged slow and fear much good     people is too depend:

and I, betwixt mine eyes? There is     not, to put fair that grace, his God-knows-what: for after thee,     and greed, I find the lover’s care, with spites; yet well he     did discretion lacke, beeing made the wintry rage of a harsh     terror and clos’d me in

pearl. From thy pure brought in? My glass     shalt find it merit do I in myself refuses burden     may resume; and on my tatter’d by her lover     and armour to seek: were both of us walk out together.     Let thicker than I.

[dailyaudiobiblechronological]

5/30/2023 DAB Chronological Transcription

Psalm 119:1-88

Welcome to the Daily Audio Bible Chronological, I'm China. Today is the 30th day of May, welcome. So glad to be with you today. Today we are in the book of Psalm and we are in chapter 119, starting with verse one, going through 88. Commentary

I so admire this theme that I'm that we're picking up here is, obeying the Lord, listening to his commandments, having understanding of what he's saying and what he's asking of us, what he's commanding and how the prayer, the heart desire here is, Lord, I want to follow you. Give me understanding and I will obey Your instructions. I'll put them into practice with all my heart. Lord, reveal yourself to me. Help me understand your ways. Help me understand the meaning of Your commandments and will meditate on Your wonderful deeds. I think there's just so much richness here, so much desire to learn and to want to know who the Lord is. And I think that this is beautiful and I love that there's so much of this that honestly, we could reread and reread. I love it. It talks about open my eyes to see the wonderful truth in Your instructions. This is like a desire to love what the Lord is saying, instead of, man, I got to do this because I don't want to die. I don't want to get it wrong. I don't want my family to die. Like that fear of the Lord where you're like, God's mad at me and he's going to punish me and I got to do this so that I don't set Him off. And this is more of a reverence and awe and a love and a holy fear of, Lord, I want to follow what you're going to say. Your laws please me. They give me wise advice. These are to help keep me safe. These are the boundaries. This is telling me where I can operate inside of. This is telling me how I can live. And I want that. And so while we, as in today, don't live inside of the Mosaic Law, we live under the freedom and the truth that Jesus came. He lived a perfect and blameless life. He came and took on all of our sin and took it to Hell and defeated the grave and reconciled a way back to us or back to the Father for us. This is the truth that we live in. I still believe that there are things that the Lord asks of us. There are things like his ways, right? Like we read about all the way back to the beginning of this year. God setting apart a chosen people to be holy and set apart. And Jesus kind of talks very similarly of like, this being his followers, being his disciples, being Christ followers, believers in the Gospel and in what he has done. So while we're on this side of the story, I believe that that still can apply. Like we can still pray all these things. We can still agree with this Psalm and say like, Lord, help me understand Your Gospels more, help me follow them, help me desire to want to be these things when I forget or when it gets hard, or when I don't want to, or when it's not popular or fill in the blank. Lord, help me, help me understand. Prayer

And so Lord, we pray for just that you would give us wisdom, you would give us understanding, Lord, that we would understand Your Word better, that we would have eyes to see, ears to hear and hearts willing to follow it out. And God, I just thank you for your word. I thank you for today's words that could become our own, this can become our own heart prayer and our desire. And I pray that it would be pray that we would have a love and desire to read Your Word, to follow it, to study it, to meditate on it, to have questions and seek out the answers. I thank you that we find you in all of it. And so Lord, we we love you, we praise you, we honor you, we thank you for Your Word. And it's in Your name we pray, amen. Announcements

Dailyaudiobible.com is our website. That is the home base where you can see what's happening here in the community, see what's going on and get connected, stay connected. So be sure to check it out. Your prayer requests, you can call those in at 800-583-2164. Or if you listen to the app you can send those in and they get sent in and play at the end of everyday's podcast. That is all for today. I'm China, I love you and I'll be waiting for you here, tomorrow. Community Prayer Line Hi, DABC family. This is Summer in the Songbird in Nebraska. Just listened to Heather in Nashville's prayer request and I want to come alongside you Heather. God, this request is so specific, a really specific living situation in the right city with the right rooms, at the right yard with her, the right amount. That's a safe thing, that's not a scam, God and you can provide that. So we are asking Lord for the exact right home for Heather that you want her to be in with the exact right timing provided because you are good be glorified through this provision. We praise you God and we pray in the holy name of Jesus. In the name of Jesus. Hey Daily Audio Bible Chronological family it's Sheena from Saskatchewan. I called in, I'm going to say last February ish letting you guys know that we're going through some court stuff and we are getting ready to go to yet another preliminary hearing that's going to take all week, the week of June 5. So if you guys could pray for us, pray for travel mercies because we are going to be driving an hour and a half there and back every day and just pray for peace and restoration and hopefully redemption I appreciate your guys prayers. Thank you so much. For those of you who prayed for us before when I called in a year and a half ago and I'll keep you. I'll update you guys after court. Thanks, love you all. Have a good day. Hi guys, it's Kate calling in. I was just listening to some prayer requests. One of them was from Rune Key from the United Kingdom. And sister, I also have trigeminal neurogia pain, so I really related to your poor sister's condition. And I do pray Father, that you took her through surgery safely and successfully and that she is on her road to less pain, dare I say no pain. Lord, I thank you for the opportunity for her to go to Qatar and have this surgery and I will be praying for her in Jesus name and also for Kim from Hampton, Virginia. Father, I pray for Kim and her husband. I pray that you would give her husband or her work so that they may meet their rent and really just give them a boost in life and whatever their next steps are going to be. And that reminded me father of Whitney. I pray that you would be working in Whitney's life to relieve some of her grief from last year and the many losses she had and that you would be providing for her. And her children for every need and comforting them and drawing them close to yourself so that they may grow in the grace and knowledge of you and feel your presence. I ask you things in Jesus name, amen.

[emcads]

i have a post cooking in my brain about how jack’s own reckoning with ‘no good deed goes unpunished’ is a reflection of a the larger theme in the series wherein acts of mercy and grace lead to your own downfall.

[dmclemblems]

maybe sometime I really will go into more detail about how inaccurately Houses handled recruits for the Lions besides for on this post (like for more depth), but the fact that you can recruit Sylvain outside the Lions in Houses is absolutely NUTS. the whole flirting with girls thing is so superficial and he knows it, so the whole idea of him joining any house because of the option of Byleth being female is super lame (even if Byleth was male he wouldn’t). his loyalty to Dimitri, Felix, Ingrid, and Faerghus itself would never allow for him to take up arms against his family group of friends or his home. he just wouldn’t.

I’m actually very happy that Hopes doesn’t allow any of the Lions to be recruited outside AG besides for Mercedes (not loytal to Faerghus) and Ashe (who you could argue Lonato with and the fact that he would just want to survive and surrender to any enemy because he needs to survive to take care of his little siblings). Only those two have reasons to be recruited whereas none of the other people in Faerghus would ever ever ever take up arms like that against their own family, friends and homeland.

I mean it’s literally basic Faerghus facts that it’s a country of extremely loyal people. they’re not loyal to their customs, just ingrained in them and Dimitri is working to carefully change any toxic customs or issues while making sure it doesn’t cause any problems that could harm the citizens (like riots and shit). they have customs that can change, but their loyalty to their home and each other is part of who they are as people.

just because they’re willing to die for their country doesn’t make them all the nonsensible shit that Edelgard and Hubert say about them. Edelgard says shit like how she can’t understand why they die for their homeland instead of surrendering and choosing to live because she’s so narrow mindedly focus on the Crest system that she literally believes Faerghus is just trying to defend its old ways and stay trapped in them.

it’s literally not. it’s a country that will fight to protect its freedom from invaders and will die for their honor, loyalty and everyone and everything they love. they don’t die to protect their systems. they fight because they aren’t willing to be overthrown. Edelgard should have known that with how long they’ve been fighting Sreng away from its borders. Faerghus is full of VERY PROUD people and you can’t just walk in with an army and go “hey so I’m here to overthrow your country and destroy your systems and throw your people in power out of power”. they’re not just gonna be like oh no how scary it’s an army. they’re gonna say bitch fuck you and your whole ass army you’re gonna have to kill us to take this country.

yeah, they’re used to their systems, but the people also recognize that Sreng has been kept away thanks to the Lance of Ruin and the Gautier family’s Crest’s power. until they’re able to find a new way to manage that, they can’t just toss the system out the window. they need a plan first and then they need to find a way to initiate that. you also can’t just change things overnight and expect the populace to be cool with it. there’s a reason it’s taking longer for Faerghus to have huge changes, and it’s because Dimitri knows how to run a country. it’s because he knows the people he needs to worry about and please are the people themselves.

tl;dr the Lions are way too fucking loyal to ever leave Faerghus. Felix is also like that and him being a tsundere character doesn’t change that. him not knowing how to handle talking to Dimitri, who he shows worry about in a very aggressive and roundabout way, is not him actually hating Dimitri and wanting to leave Faerghus behind. his issues with Dimitri also don’t extend to Faerghus itself, so even if they couldn’t find common ground again (which they do), Felix would not leave Faerghus because his country has nothing to do with their personal issues. if he didn’t like something Dimitri did as a ruler, he’d want to be there as someone who can borrow Dimitri’s ear and give him advice to help him. he would not just walk away and be like oh well I guess Faerghus is fucked. he’d work to help fix the problem.

while I understand the overall reason for Houses letting you recruit basically anyone, I know it’s also a common thing that people mention how much of an asspull the dialogue is for the characters’ reason for turning on their homeland. it’s one of those things where you can’t reasonably recruit them as a real story-based ally because it messes with their core character. in the case of Hopes, it at least handles the recruit problem for the Lions waaaay better.

like... if this universe was real, you would not be recruiting them to another country’s side in war. you just wouldn’t because you couldn’t. it’s like trying to pull a single brick out of a solid brick wall with just your hands and nails. y’ain’t doin’ it.

[astaroth1357]

Yandere Demon Dating Game!!

Pick your sweet, sweet poison today!

Congratulations!! You, dear reader, have the exclusive opportunity to select a lover straight from the upper echelon of Hell! We've rounded up nine fantastic demon suitors all ready to take your hand for their own, completely stress free and with no awkward courtship! There is just one catch though, they already love you quite a bit… in their own demonic way. 

Please, browse our eagerly awaiting bachelors to your heart's content! Once you've made your choice, CLICK BELOW THE CUT to see who your new love gets to be!

Warning: Yandere Behavior, Possessive Behavior, Probably Some Implied Violence

All behavior described is for the purpose of fantasy and this is in no way an endorsement of performing any of this in real life!

Bachelor #1

Bachelor #1 could compare you to the moon and the stars but in his eyes not even those could compare to your radiance. You are the most precious being in existence and he’ll do everything in his considerable power to see your every need met! There’s not a thing between Heaven and Hell that he can’t provide for you and he’ll do so happily. You are, quite simply, his world.

But being a person’s everything can have some drawbacks… Bachelor #1 will only feel comfortable if he knows that you’re his. Really and truly in every way possible, and he’s not very used to rejection… at all. You won’t be able to overpower nor escape him, even if you could get some distance between you it’ll never last... Best resign yourself completely because he’ll own every part of you that he wants to... body and soul.

Bachelor #2

Bachelor #2 cherishes every bit of you and all that you stand for as someone truly without no equal. He’ll turn to you first on his rainy days and he’ll want to show you off on his sunny. He’ll never get enough of being with or worshipping you and only you. Flaws and insecurities be damned! He will love you with a depth that could rival the sea and a strength that even God couldn't break. He’d challenge anyone to try.

They’d all fail, of course. Bachelor #2 will know the most about you, even things you thought he never could… because he’s been following your every move. If he can’t be attached to your hip, then he’ll tail you like a shadow, keeping details meticulously stashed away in his mind.... Unfortunately, if you speak to anyone else that means he’ll know right away, and he’ll make it very clear how much he hates you giving your attention away so freely...

Bachelor #3

Bachelor #3's love is as pure and true as a fairytale. He wants nothing more than to shield you from all the horrors of the world, human or demon, and he's loyal to a fault. Truly, you could not be in safer hands. He'll do almost anything that you ask without complaint just to see you happy… He does so love to see your smile...

Now, Bachelor #3 would never hurt you, in fact, he’ll make sure that nothing ever will. Your smile is all he cares about and he’ll guard it with his life. So best keep that smile up because he won’t care to listen if he ever finds you sad. If you’re upset, then he’s upset, but he’ll express that through Pure. Destruction. It doesn’t matter who hurt you, you don’t get to stop him. You don’t get to argue. So just keep sitting and smiling for everyone else’s sake… Because if you’re smiling then you must be happy… right?

Bachelor #4

Bachelor #4 only wants you to see the best of him as he’d like to see the best of you! He sees within you more than just kindness, but a genuine potential to be everything he’s ever wanted. He loves you from the depths of his soul and he believes that you can do this! Though he may not say it, in his dreams, the two of you will be together forever. Happy and content no matter what life throws at you… but some things just take… adjusting.

Bachelor #4 wants only the best for you, you know? His words may sound harsh but he means well. He may lose his temper once in a while, but that’s just to make a point. He’d never hurt you, truly he’s never! But how else is he going to make you remember how much you need him? What about when you don’t listen?? Honestly, that independent streak of yours is going to have to go… Just follow the rules, love, please… This is all for you, you know?

Bachelor #5

Bachelor #5 wishes to discover all that he can about you, your every hope, dream, and interest. To him, you’ll be an endless fascination meant for his enjoyment alone. He’ll find every way he can to make you laugh or smile at a feverish pace and commit them to memory like it's etched in stone. He’ll never get enough of drinking in your reactions, truly you are a work of art!

But by every reaction, we mean every single one... Bachelor #5 wants to see it all, the good, the bad, and the genuinely harrowing. He’ll know your every hope as well as your every fear and will soak it in with delight all the same. It’s not his fault, love, really. When everything about you is just so captivating, how can he ever hope to look away? You’re strong enough to give him what he wants… aren’t you?

Bachelor #6

Bachelor #6 may love you quietly but make no mistake, the sheer intensity of his feelings are practically unrivaled by any other option before you today. He won’t be satisfied until you’re both seen as one whole, a package deal that no one would ever think to break. Life with him can be filled with nothing but softness and bliss, light touches and impassioned words, until the worlds fall down around you…

To clarify, the keyword here is “can.” Bachelor #6 will make one thing very clear, you are a package deal and that’s how you’ll stay. Where you go, he goes. If he doesn’t want to go, then you stay. Plain and simple. If you want to go, you stay. If others die, you stay. If the world ends, you stay. Even if it kills you, you stay. So why not just enjoy the bliss while it lasts?

Bachelor #7

Bachelor #7 wants only the best for you because he knows it’s what you most deserve. For anyone to catch his eye quite like you have, then you must be just that special and he’ll seek out every opportunity he can to make your life much sweeter. In essence, he’ll take care of you better than anyone else ever could, including yourself, and he’ll take pleasure in making sure that your every need is met. You’ll want for nothing that you can have…

But you’ll never have your freedom back. Bachelor #7 sees no reason for you to be without him (however would you survive?) so he has it all planned out for you. You’ll be in the lap of luxury, the pinnacle of comfort, truly your new home is a magnificent gilded cage. He’ll treat you gently so long as you do the same for him. But even the nicest cages can be covered and forgotten if the owner so chooses… No matter how pretty their pet sings.

Bachelor #8

Bachelor #8 lives in worlds one can only dream of and yet you’re by far the best thing he could ever ask for. Try as he might, he can’t think of anything that really compares to you. Your magnificence is beyond the description of even the most skilled of poets… Truthfully, he hardly can stop thinking about you. You take up so much space in his mind that he can scarcely imagine his life without you in it...

So… he doesn’t. Bachelor #8 genuinely believes that you're the happiest couple in existence. Not, “you will be.” You are. And to his credit, his love is sweet and true even if he sees things slightly… obtuse. You won’t be able to reason with him because he buried logic a long time ago… He loves you and you love him, even if he gets upset, you love him. Even if he hurts someone… you love him. Don’t you?

Bachelor #9

Bachelor #9’s devotion to you will never be in question. He’s given himself to you wholeheartedly and would be thrilled if you were to do the same for him. He’s more than willing to throw everything aside for you and that’s not an honor he offers to anyone. Just know that he'll always be there to protect you and he'll do anything to prove his love to you… whether you know it or not.

And there's a good deal you won't know. Bachelor #9 will come across as the most heroic of the bunch, a true lifesaver, but don't be fooled. He isn't saving you from anything. Or, well he is but he’s behind the danger to start with. Not that you'll never know it mid-rescue, tucked up within his arms… you'll never feel safe without him. He'll make sure of that.

When you've selected your fine Bachelor of choice click the cut to see what lucky man you're taking home!

Bachelor #1: Diavolo

Aiming high aren’t we, reader? Congratulations, you’ve chosen the Prince of Hell! Being with Lord Diavolo will be a bit of a roller coaster so we hope you’re prepared. For as much as he has to offer he’s a little… demanding at times. Keeping up with a princely schedule will do that to a person. Just enjoy you gold and your gems when you can… you certainly won’t be getting much rest, that’s for sure.

Bachelor #2: Asmodeus 

So you’ve selected Asmodeus? Excellent choice, reader! Really, he’s among the safer options on this list as long as you don’t mind giving up some of your privacy. Well, okay all of your privacy but what’s yours is his and everything about you is his now. Please don’t get too upset, he’ll be nice! Just remember to keep those eyes where they belong, right~?

Bachelor #3: Beelzebub

It looks like you’ve chosen the ever-loyal Beelzebub! Wonderful selection, reader, clearly you care deeply about your own safety. We suppose the same can’t be said for anyone else, but hey? What’s a few black eyes and broken bones between friends? You can always stand to lose some family, can’t you? It’s all in the name of love after all.

Bachelor #4: Lucifer

Well, well reader, you’ve selected the eldest brother, Lucifer! You’ll be delighted to know that your new beloved will treat you as dearly as he would his own heart… so long as you follow his instructions and listen to his "advice." Even dogs can follow basic commands, so you can too… can't you?

Bachelor #5: Satan

Fantastic choice, reader! We're certain that you and Satan will make quite the happy couple! ...most of the time. He is a curious fellow and may need to "test" your limits from time to time but it's only because he adores you so much. No worries, it'll all be over soon… but then again, what is "soon" to a demon?

Bachelor #6: Belphegor 

Congratulations, dear reader, it seems you've picked the seventh brother, Belphegor! You can expect to spend long hours lazing with this dreamy demon, he'll want nothing more than to be around you… and he'll growl if you try to leave. Always remember, he'll make sure you stay in his bed one way or another...

Bachelor #7: Barbatos 

Very good choice, reader, picking the butler himself means you must obviously have some classy tastes. You really won't have to worry about much but… do you handle isolation well? Best hope so, he's a busy man and, frankly, you won't be going anywhere anymore.

Bachelor #8: Leviathan

Looking to make Leviathan's dreams of bliss a reality, are you? What a commendable endeavor, reader! We respect your choice. Though don't worry, you'll live up to his expectations. You don't get a say in the matter.

Bachelor #9: Mammon

A bit of a White Knight chaser, are you? Well your life won't be lacking excitement with Mammon! Back alley gangs, run away trains, suspicious fires, you name it and he'll be there for you. We're sure you'll be fine, you're in Mammon's hands! His very… "capable" hands. Why be concerned?

Did you make the right choice? 

Check out my Masterlist for other stuff I've posted.

[the-last-kenobi]

*kciks down door* ReQuEsTs?!??! uh, 18. “Is it all right if I hug you?” with Obi-wan and character of your choice (please, this boy needs a hug so bad)

Hugs!!!! What an excellent ask.

Took me forever to pick a character though. I came this close to writing multiple hugs throughout the years but it would’ve been very long...

It’s still long. Whoops.

Note: I skipped the actual sentence and instead went for ✨vibes only✨

(From this various prompts list.)

_

Obi-Wan is twenty-three standard years old, very nearly twenty-four.

It is a delightful stage of life. (It’s awful.)

He’s growing in independence, so close to Knighthood he can almost taste it. (Is he? Nobody seems to have a clear opinion.)

He’s receiving more and more solo assignments, and on his missions with Master Jinn, the older Jedi makes an effort to at least await the Padawan’s input before making a decision, sometimes even deferring to Obi-Wan’s word. (Only in public, though, is there a sense of equality. Behind the scenes, Obi-Wan is still very much the learner.)

He longs to be free. (He doesn’t want to be alone.)

The confusing clash of thoughts and emotions is, in and of itself, a creator of more clashing emotions, all resulting in a bundle of self-doubt that crouches near his heart, like a greedy bird, picking away at his strength and certainty when he most needs it.

Doesn’t your doubt show you that you’re truly not ready? the pestering creature asks.

Doesn’t your longing for freedom prove you don’t deserve it? it says, tapping against the veins of ice and fear that lie right against the heat of his heart.

Doesn’t your need to be reassured tell you that you’re too hesitant, too weak to be alone?

His desire to fly is wrong. His desire to be sheltered, even more so.

Both together, coexisting in his heart and mind, could quite possibly mean the one thing he had been dreading for over a decade now, the thing older Jedi, real Jedi, had put into words and addressed to his face when he was only twelve, only eleven, only ten.

You are too emotional, they said.

You are overeager, they said.

You are not destined to be a Jedi, Qui-Gon had told him. I will not train you.

He had, in the end, and Obi-Wan has been wondering in the depths of his heart for all these years of it had not been a dreadful mistake. As much as the Force sings in his ears Jedi, Jedi, Jedi, endure, Jedi, Jedi, it felt like everything he touched, everything tangible, argues back failure, weak, selfish, foolish, unwanted, not fit.

Obi-Wan is twenty-three, almost twenty-four, and he is years into adulthood and light years away from proving that he’s capable of handling it.

When will he be Knighted?

Nobody seems to be expecting it from him.

Do they know, he wonders, have they known since the beginning that I am doomed to fail? Has this all been a gracious attempt, a thank you for my actions on Bandomeer, and they have drawn this out and out and out as long as they can?

How much longer can this go on?

Still, there are moments when he is at peace, when Obi-Wan is sure. When he meditates, when he accomplishes something new, when he walks away from an assignment feeling unashamed when he translates his memories into a tidy mission report.

When he has one of his long talks with Master Yoda, or Master Windu, who despite their revered status have taken to talking to him more like a friend than a child, outside of the Council chambers.

When he remembers the Force whispering inside, Jedi Jedi Jedi Jedi, endure, Jedi...

And then, on one of the missions assigned to both himself and his Master - still the overwhelming majority of his assignments - he and Qui-Gon are separated during a violent uprising.

There are bodies in the streets and buildings are aflame; children weep over the bodies of their parents and parents cradle the bodies of their children and scream as if the sound is their only companion left in the world. The standing government has a point, the rebellion has a point, the civilians caught in the crossfire don’t say which point they agree with because they’re too busy screaming and perishing, and Qui-Gon is simply gone.

Obi-Wan, faced with the threat of further bloodshed right here and right now even as the air is still clogged with ash and flame and as another body topples from a rooftop in front of his feet, raises his hand in surrender and calmly proposes a truce, offering himself as a legal hostage against the government that brought the Jedi here.

Obi-Wan is led away with his hands bound behind his back and his lightsaber taken away, and though his face is calm, the furrow between is brow speaks of his inner turmoil, which sounds like tapping against the cracks in his heart and Qui-Gon, where is Master Qui-Gon, I don’t know what I’m doing, if I fail more people will die, if I fail it will be my fault, is this taking charge or stepping aside, am I a leader or a victim?

He spends not days, not weeks, but three standard months as a hostage. He spends a terrible amount of time sitting in a cell and pondering his uselessness, the gravity of his foolishness, but every time someone opens the door and escorts him out to hold parley with the leaders of the rebellion and the ministry of the planet, he holds his head high, tempers his fear, and speaks to them with all he has.

Which is honesty. Humility.

You don’t know what to do, he says. Neither do I.

We all know we must do something. No matter how much blood you spill and how much earth you scorch you will eventually come back here to this table to have this same discussion until either both of you are broken beyond belief or one of you has been crushed, and half your planet’s voice stolen away. And you will have sacrificed two of the Republic’s Jedi along the way, a black mark against whichever victor is left standing.

Or, he says, we choose to pass over the violence and talk here and now, and choose this again and again and again. You have already had your fighting. Your people are already hoping for negotiation.

Are you here for their sakes or to kill them for show?

He does not use these exact words.

He sews them into his brief speeches, hammers in the point sharply when he must, weaves the common thread over and over again.

He knows they fight while he is locked away.

But he believes, from the growing respect in the eyes of these people who hold him both by his and against his will, that he is making a difference. He must be.

And Obi-Wan is twenty-three, very very nearly twenty-four, when he finally walks free to witness the signing of a treaty like this planet has never had before, to witness the formation of a new government, and he discovers not ashes and mass graves when he sees daylight for the first time in three months — but instead, a city and a planet marred only by scattered battlefields, and marked more clearly by the way its people have fought to keep it clean, to keep it safe.

Children race through the streets, unafraid, because they have had real shelter during the war. It has not entered their homes since that first terrible day.

Neighbors from opposing sides of this fight and friends who staked no claim in this war mingle freely. Their smiles are a little hesitant, but they are there.

The dead are all honored equally.

It is leaps and bounds, it is a civilization that propelled itself through years of struggle in three months, and Obi-Wan is awed by them.

He knows it cannot be this way everywhere.

He knows that there will be wars where no one wants to surrender, or where one side will be so certain of their point of view that they would rather raise hell than cease, and he knows there will be people who resist them.

But today it is real.

Obi-Wan looks at his pale and clammy hands, the marks around his wrists where he was so often bound, and feels the way his limbs shake from months of too little sunlight, not quite enough food, and more than his share of fear and doubt and self-recrimination.

As he smiles for a camera that will record this moment forever, he glimpses Qui-Gon amongst the crowd.

Someone explains to him, when he asks, that his Master had been injured during the uprising and spent the first three weeks of Obi-Wan’s captivity in convalescence. The remaining time, he has spent on the sidelines, forced there by his Padawan’s actions. With Obi-Wan a willing hostage, playing negotiator and leverage both, Qui-Gon had no role except to mingle with the people, offer them comfort and aid.

Something Obi-Wan knows his Master loved, but — he had still stolen his Master’s role.

He had thrown himself into a stupid, foolish situation, and how many times had Qui-Gon teased him about playing damsel in distress? And here he has gone and surrendered of his own accord. What would Qui-Gon have done if Obi-Wan had led them all to ruin?

Obi-Wan slowly loses his confidence, his relief, his silver tongue, as the press and the people recede, and he and his Master walk to a room that has been prepared for both of them, as honored guests by this new government.

Qui-Gon says nothing to him.

They walk in silence for twelve minutes.

And then, as soon as the door has shut behind them, Obi-Wan finds himself pulled into a fierce embrace, one of his Master’s hands buried in his hair, Qui-Gon’s chin resting atop his head.

Obi-Wan hesitates.

Does his Master think him a child?

Perhaps Qui-Gon senses his thoughts, because the man pulls away briefly, still holding his Padawan by the shoulders, as if unwilling to let him go completely, else he vanish like smoke.

“Padawan,” Qui-Gon says, and his voice is loud and strong and brimming with warmth that washes over Obi-Wan like sunlight, like water, like an embrace. “Well done, my Padawan.”

And then he is pulled again into Qui-Gon’s comforting arms, and Obi-Wan breathes in and gives in, folding against his teacher like a child, and if a few tears stain Qui-Gon’s robes or drop into Obi-Wan’s hair, neither of them speaks of it.

Obi-Wan lets his Master hold him, lets go of fear and pride and doubt, and finds that he is safe.

~

[thewritetofreespeech]

Words: 5000+

Rating: M

Pairing: Benimaru (TSSK) x Reader

Summary: You were husband & wife in name only.

AO3

The moon was bright & crisp in the sky over Rimuru. Even without your candle light, you would probably be able to see clearly into your mirror as you brushed out your hair, preparing for bed. It had been a challenging day.

Keeping Shion and Shuna from destroying their Lord with their love was a full-time job sometimes. Being the buffer between them was sometimes more than your poor human body could take; a fact Rimuru-sama was often concerned about. You usually brushed it off with a ‘better me than you’ remark as his peril would be far more of a detriment to others than you, but appreciated his concern. Besides, neither ogre-ess would intentionally hurt you. Worst you’d ever come away with before was a good goose egg from Shion swinging around Hercules’s willy-nilly and caught you in the back of the head. It was an accident, and she could have easily crushed your head like a melon, but Shion still cried for almost 3 days after every time she saw you in apology.

You chuckle a little at the memory. How wonderfully problematic your life had become in this past year. You wouldn’t call it ‘blissful’. It had it’s challenges like most. But your life taken an interest, wonderful turn that had led you to this life you wouldn’t trade anything for. You were safe. You were loved. You were a respected person when just some months ago you were nobody and nothing. How quickly the world turns.

A knock at your door halted the comb in your tresses and you look up surprised by the sound. “Who is it?” You ask. Curious who would be at your door so late at night.

“It’s me.” Your eyes blink in surprise as you hear the familiar deep timber of Benimaru behind the frame. “May I come in?”

You stammer out a reply of ‘one moment’ as you adjust yourself to make your appearance more presentable and told him to come in. It was embarrassing to have him see you in your night clothes. But if he was coming here so late at night, it must be important. Your husband never came to your chambers this late at night.

The title of ‘husband’ was in name only. You and Benimaru were not romantically involved, nor had you chosen each other completely of your own free will. He had saved you, along with Rimuru-sama and the rest of the Kijin, when they defeated the great bandit army that had been sweeping the east. Once just thugs of human and monsters alike, they had grown into a real threat in the land taking anything they please. Money. Goods. Women. When they came to your small village, they had burned it down and had taken you with them when they left. You were their prisoner and slave for nearly two months before Rimuru-sama and his band had come along.

You still remember seeing them for the first time. Bright and regal. A peasant before being a slave, you had never seen such fine strange clothes before. Nor the impending presence of the man in front of you when he’d come upon you.

“I claim this woman as my own.” They were the first words he’d ever said to you. Then he picked you up over his shoulder and carried you away with his band while the smoldering embers of the great bandit army died out in the distance.

 At first, you thought it was all going to be the same. One capture was no different than the last; though you were a little concerned about an ogre being your master than a human. But how much worse could it be? The last human captor you had had been a true monster. Being owned by a real one could not be that different. Or at least that was what you thought at first.

The ogres and Rimuru-sama had been impossibly kind. They tended to your wounds from your long capture. Gave you a place to sleep. Clothes. Fed you, although there was some debate on which ogre-ess’s cooking would ‘best suit you’, and treated you as an equal. You were incredibly moved by their generosity. They were even willing to take you home. And when you told them “I have no home” they seemed genuinely hurt by that.

You of course explained to them what happened, and realized now that you really had no place to go. You thought you would die in the bandit camp. So the thought had never crossed your mind where you would go should your imprisonment be over. You were lost and alone in the world. No money. No home. No family. Even if you left, who was to say you wouldn’t be taken up by another group who found your helplessness easy pickings? Or worse, going to that life on your own because you had no other choices…..

“You’re staying here.” Benimaru had announced, much to the surprise of everyone. “You’re my woman now, remember? I defeated those fools and claimed you as my prize. This is your home now. You’re staying here.”

There was a loud commotion from the group as they all thought he had been joking but, apparently, he wasn’t. While the energetic group argued, you looked at Benimaru critically and realized what he was doing. He knew that if you didn’t belong to someone, you could easily be taken by another. If not the remanences of the great bandit army, but someone else; as you feared. Being his woman, letting him lay claim, offered you protection you couldn’t afford on your own. “Ok,” you’d told him. Your soft voice somehow ringing out over the crowd.

Rimuru-sama had of course forbade his general from ‘keeping’ a woman. He said if he wanted to do this, he would have to do the honorable thing and marry you. It had been surprising how quickly he agreed. Then asked if you would be alright with it and you’d said yes. You had been married the next day, and were then husband & wife, and that was the end of it.

Your married life was that of about the same as anyone else in the close group. You weren’t intimate. You didn’t share secrets or stories. You didn’t even sleep in the same quarters of the estate. Aside from a few group outings, communal meals, and when he popped in on Shuna when you were around, you honestly rarely saw your ‘husband’.

Which was why it was so surprising he was here now, at this late hour.

“What is it Benimaru-sama? Is something wrong?” You ask, looking up at him from where you’d been sitting on the floor before he sat down too. His expression was placid, so it was hard to tell if something was going on.

“The envoy from Blumund is leaving tomorrow.” His eyes fixed on the hardwood under your knees.

“Yes, I know. He told me. He’s a little hard to miss.” You reply with a soft chuckle.

The envoy in question was a nice man. Tall, lean. A little bit older than you, but still a jovial person. Rimuru-sama had set you with the important task of keeping him company and being his escort during his stay. His immediate council in the Kijin were nice, but they sometimes lack the social grace or understanding of human culture. He didn’t want to offend the man and trusted you could keep him company during his stay.

“He’s rather taken with you.” Benimaru then stated. Taking you a bit by surprise. “He wants to take you back to Blumund with him.”

Your bit of surprise turned into full blown shock. “W…What are you talking about??”

“He wants to take you back to Blumund with him.” He repeated. As if somehow that made you understand completely. “He said he thinks you’re very beautiful, and charming, and that it would be a better fit for you to live among humans, rather than here in Rimuru with none of them. He talked to Rimuru-sama about this.”

“And Rimuru-sama told you about this?”

“I was there.” Benimaru stated after he shook his head. “He asked for us to severe our bond so you could go with him. So you could marry him.”

Your eyes probably bug out of your head now. Were you being proposed to by proxy by your own husband?!?

“How could he ask such a thing?!”

“Like I said, he’s taken with you.”

“That’s not the point! How am I supposed to marry someone else when I’m already married?!”

“He knows our marriage isn’t consummated.” His eyes finally look up to catch yours.

You feel your whole body turn red. Now you have to look away to stare at the floor. It was true. Your marriage wasn’t consummated. It had been something done to offer you protection and stability. It had never been about love. So you have never laid with your husband as he wished to respect your virtue. “How crude.” You mutter. Embarrassed, more than anything, as you were sure people knew about your unclaimed marriage, but no one would dare bring it up until now.

“Do you want to go with him?”

You look up again and offer a soft noise of surprise at the question. “Do you want to go with him?” He repeated. “As you said, he’s a good man. He has fortune, and power. You’d be a respected woman among your people. You’d be among your people.” Maybe you imagined it, but you thought you saw Benimaru wince at that. “You don’t have to stay here anymore. You don’t have to stay with me. You’re established enough now to make your own choices. You can be free.”

Free? The word played over in your head for a moment. The sheer concept completely foreign to you at the moment.

You’d never been free. First you belonged to your family. Then the bandits. Then Benimaru. Though you had freedom on occasion, you had never been truly free. And now that you had it, you found the idea ironically suffocating. You could choose to leave. Leave Rimuru City and start a new life as a woman of prominence in Blumund. But what if you didn’t want to leave?

“D…Do you want me to leave?” The kijin looked up at you again with a confused expression at your soft words. “If you want me to leave I will. But…I don’t want to leave all of you. I love being here, and being with Shion, and Shura, Rimuru-sama and….you. My ‘people’ have never been kind to me, so I really don’t want to go back to them. I want to stay here. We don’t have to be married anymore, if that’s the problem. We can still break our bond, if that’s what you want. But I’d like to – “That’s not what I want!”

Your eyes flicker up. Startled by the red Kijin’s roar and the burning fire resting in his eyes. “I don’t want to break our bond! I don’t want you to go with him! Do you have any idea how hard it was not to tear that man’s head off at the table when he said that?! I wanted to gouge his eyes out for saying you were beautiful! I wanted to rip out his heart out for ever letting you rest in it! You’re my woman, and my wife, and he thinks he can just say those things to me and live! He should kiss Rimuru-sama’s feet before he leaves because he’s the only reason that wretch is still breathing!”

Silence passed between you for a moment as you were completely stunted into speechlessness by Benimaru’s words. You had never expected such a passionate response out of the man. Until now, you were sure his only feelings toward you were ambivalence and mild friendship. The way he just ‘my wife’ to you, however, let you know that he had thought of this more than just a marriage of convenience. Your body flushed hot again as your heart beat hammered in your chest. “Benimaru….sama?”

“Don’t go with him.” The kijin repeated. Calmer this time as his expression seemed to morph into sadness at the thought of you leaving. “I can’t stand the idea of you leaving with him. When we first met, and I took you as my woman & wife, I will admit that I did it out of pity for you. You lost everything, and had nothing. I know what that’s like and wished to spare you. I thought that, after a few months, you would have a good enough reputation as the former wife of the Ogre Prince, Commander of the Jura forces, that we could break our bond honorably and you could make your own path in the world without fear. But, as time went on, I became more and more attached to you. Your kindness in spite of everything you endured. Your determination. Your desire to work hard to make things better for everyone here. I grew to fall in love with you and I couldn’t let you go. I know it was selfish, and that I’m being selfish now, but please don’t go.”

Your heart was still hammering so hard in your chest that you were scared you might faint. You felt like you could swoon at any moment. “Why didn’t you ever tell me this before?”

He looked down and started to fidget. “I was afraid you wouldn’t feel the same.” His confession less confident this time. “You weren’t really given much of a choice in our marriage. I was afraid that you thought of me as just another man who had taken you. If you didn’t feel the same I could live with it, but knowing was – “That’s not true!”

It was Benimaru’s turn for his eyes to flicker up and be stunned by your confession. Apparently you had more in common than you thought. “I’ve never thought of you that way! If anything, I’ve only ever seen you as my rescuer. You saved me from a horrible existence as a slave. You gave this life that is so wonderful. With friends, and people I can’t live without anymore. I can’t begin to repay you.  Or tell you how I feel….”

All these feelings and emotions were rushing to the surface now the more you spoke. You had always been fond of Benimaru. Your strong, brave protector. You just assumed that he wanted nothing to do with you. The distance he put between you making it very clear. So you had pushed your feelings toward the back of your heart. Forgetting them until now, where they crashed to the front like a dam had burst.

“[Y/N]….” You look up into the red head’s eyes when he said your name. Whispered it, really, like it was some secret plea. His hand then reached out slowly to cup your cheek. Those battle calloused hands incredibly gentle against your skin. You really might swoon at the juxtaposition.

Those burning red orbs look at you in earnest before they flicker down to your lips. A silent request. One you eagerly receive.

The only time you had kissed your husband before this was at your wedding. To seal your bond. That, however, had been just a simple peck on the lips to meet the contract. This was a real kiss. Your lips pressing together in committed passion. Intense, but both of you still too shy it seemed to go past pressing your lips soundly together.

“[Y/N],” Benimaru said again as you press your foreheads together after your kiss. You don’t ever think you’ve heard your name sound so sweet. “Become my woman and my wife. Truly. You didn’t get a choice when we first met, but I ask you this now to make your own decision. Will you be mine?”

Your heart swelled unbearably tight in your chest before you nodded against his forehead. “Yes. Yes, I want to be your woman and your wife. Truly.”

You can feel the smile on his lips when he kissed you again. More deeply this time. His tongue snaked into your mouth against yours. The way he was kissing you making your legs feel weak to the point that you were happy you were sitting down. However, if they had buckled, your strong husband could easily pick you up in his arms. A shiver racing down your spine at the lewd thought that had just passed through you.

“Aah…I knew it. This is why I stayed away from you.” Benimaru said, finally letting you go. Your lips were kiss swollen now, and you were having a hard time understanding what he was talk about. “Every time I was near you, I wanted to claim you.” He explained. His expression looking deliriously happy as he examined his handiwork on your lips. “It was so hard to even be in the same room as you with your scent always hounding me every moment I was near. I had to stay away so I wouldn’t do anything horrible to you. But then that was its own torture as well. Near, apart. Both were an agony I couldn’t face somedays. Now that I have you though, I’ll never let you away from my side. You’ve summoned the beast in me. I hope you’re prepared.”

A loud squeak left your lips as the sneaky ogre flipped you. Instantly going from sitting on your ankles to flat on your back. Your world righted again and was filled with Benimaru as he leaned on top of you. His expression soft but heated, making you blush, before he kissed you again. His weight on top of you now making you moan wanton into the kiss this time.

Your world was filled with passionate kisses. They steal your breath away and make you squirm under your husband. You then feel his hands on your side. Touching you. Caressing your curves. You feel them fumbling around for your kimono tie, unwilling to let your lips go for even a moment to get to it properly, and place your hand on his chest.

“Benimaru, wait.”

The kijin stopped instantly and sat back off you. His eyes questing into your own to see what was wrong.

“I just….I thought I should…I mean we never…I’m not…” You stumble over the words to say to him. To explain that you weren’t the maiden he might have hoped for. The words cling in your throat as images of your former life flash across your mind. You feel unworthy. Dirty. Then his hand reached out to you brush your cheek again. Causing one of the tears that were welling up in your eyes to fall against it.

“That doesn’t matter to me.” He said with assurity and a softness that could only be described as love. “It doesn’t change how I feel about you. I love you as you are now. Not who you could be. My only regret is that I couldn’t kill those bastards 100 times more over for ever having hurt you.”

You scoff out a chuckle at the violent decree said so sweetly. You hand came up to clasp his own. “I don’t want to disappoint you.”

“You could never disappointment.” He replied, almost instantly. Then kissed your hand as he brought it to his lips once he removed it from your cheek. “Do you wish to stop? We don’t have to do this now. I can be satisfied with you declaring you want to be my woman and my wife. Well….contented.”

You chuckle again, more light hearted this time, and leaned in to initiate your kiss this time. “I meant what I said. I want to be your woman and your wife truly. I don’t want to stop.”

A sigh of relief left Benimaru. The prince willing to stop if you wanted but clearly so glad you didn’t. You giggle and let him take you in his arms.

The momentary pause in your kissing afforded Benimaru the chance to undo your kimono tie. Loosening it and letting it fall, but not pushing the thin material of your actual robe off your body yet. You reach out for him as well to undo the clasp of his overcoat. The heavy material immediately falling of his shoulders, in contrast, once the hold was released. He seemed fascinated with your work as your hands untie his under coat as well.

“Your touch is like fire.”

“Is that a joke?” You ask when Benimaru growled those words at you. Your apex quivering at the sound, but still curious if he was making a joke.

He chuckled. Another shiver at your core. “No. But I guess I can see how it would be. I mean it though. Everywhere you touch me sets a fire in me.” His hand came up to take yours and slip it under his loose top now. Guiding it over the hard planes of his chest over to his heart. “I can’t get enough of it.”

You kiss again and continue stripping. There wasn’t much to let go of for you, as just before now you were preparing for bed, so you were quickly naked in front of him. He talked about your touch being fire, but his was burning you up inside. His hands were hot. They left a lingering heat in your body everywhere he touched, to the point that you wonder if he had activated his magic. You were helpless against his soft touches. Your body aching already before he even properly touched.

Then, when he did, your body became a livewire.

Your limbs immediately went taunt when his fingers touched your core. “Please try to relax.” He whispered to you in your hair. His own long, hard body nestled beside you. Holding you close.

You try to do as he said and relax. It wasn’t difficult after the initial shock as the pleasure made it easy to succumb to him. Those hands so skilled at fighting working your body with similar expertise. “Mmmm…Benimaru….”

“Ah…say that again.” His deep voice was in your ear again. This time sounding elated, before his tongue reached out to lick the shell of it. “Say my name again. Please.”

“Benimaru…” You repeat his name over and over again. His precious name he held so dear. The name Rimuru-sama had given to him. It fell from your lips like a prayer chant as his fingers brought you closer and closer to climax. When you did, it fell from your lips again in a shout. “Benimaru!”

He continued to touch you until your walls stopped clamping around his digits. Finally setting them free. Your spent body laid against him, and you open your eyes tiredly just in time to see him cleaning your juices from his fingers. “Ah…my love tastes so sweet. I could get addicted to your flavor.”

If you body wasn’t already flushed from orgasm, you would have blushed completely. Benimaru seemed pretty proud of himself, however, before he leaned in to kiss you. You don’t think you taste sweet at all. But the taste of yourself on his lips was something you could get addicted to too. When had you become so perverted?

He let you go for a moment and shuffled around to pull out of his pants. You watched him, in the soft light. His handsome body bare to you. Not a mark on him thanks to his skill and healing. Your eyes travel down and find the proof of his love for you staring back proudly at your face. You gulp at his size. That was going to be inside you.

“Don’t worry. I know it’s a bit bigger than a human’s, but I’ll try not to hurt you.”

“I-It’s alright.” You reply back at his concern. He had mistaken your gulp for a concern about his size. How shameful he would probably find you if he found out that it wasn’t from concern, but excitement, that had caused you to gulp. Again, when had you become so perverted? “I trust you. And I want to be with you.”

“[Y/N]….” He spoke your name softly again before he leaned in to kiss you. Guiding you back down on your back. You feel his weight press on top of you. Your legs spread wide around his pelvis to let him mount you. You can feel the tip of his erection pressing against your entrance and shiver a little at the lower kiss. “Please tell me if I’m hurting you.” Benimaru urged as he started to press into you.

You let out a wordless cry at the initial invasion into your most private place. You can feel your entrance stretch to accommodate him. The sensation a duality of pleasure and pain. And it was only the first few inches. Finally, agonizingly slowly, he was fully inside you. The kijin raining kisses down over your face and neck and everywhere else his lips could get to as you held on to him. His back tight under your fingers as he was very clearly straining to wait for you. “I’m alright, Benimaru. Please. Continue.”

You felt him nod against your shoulder before his hips pull back away from yours, then forward back into you. You both moan at the initial slow thrust. The feeling indescribable and compounding with each shallow thrust. “[Y/N]….”

“Mmmm…Benimaru….” You moan back when he said your name. “You can…go faster….” Not that you weren’t enjoying this slow entanglement, one could only describe as love making, you could tell that he was holding back and it was hard for him. “I..I want you. Please….Make me your woman.”

“I did warn you.” His voice sounded hard now, in comparison to the soft words he’d whispered to you earlier, and you think you hear the sound of nails scratching against the floor mat by your head.

His hips pull back again, this time practically pulling out of you, before they slam back in. You let out a loud cry. One readily identified as one not of pain. Then all you can do is hold on. Your arms wrap tight around Benimaru’s neck as he pounded into you. Before, where you had tried to roll your hips up to meet his thrusts when they had been soft & gentle, all you can do now is lay under him and take it. And become a babbling mess it seemed.

“Ah~! B-Benimaruuu! S-So good! Don’t stop!”

“I have no intention of stopping.” His words were stern. The cool seriousness of his intention to keep claiming you made your walls quake around him. “You’re my woman now. This body is mine. I’ll remind you of it every day if I have to. You’ve possessed me to the point of madness with this love. I can never let you go.” His tongue laved at the sweat collecting on the skin of your neck. Following it up to the back of your ear before his teeth bit into the soft flesh there. You let out a yelp, and call his name again, before you were cumming. Your nails biting him back into his shoulder.

“Ah! [Y/N]! Too tight. It’s too tight. I’m gonna-!” His hard thrusts come to a staggering halt as he spilled his seed inside you. Holding there before his hips roll softly against you as his cock continued to twitch its release.

He collapsed on top of you once it was finished. Your bliss worn body not seeming to care about the extra weight as you held him against your bosom and both tried to catch your breath. Rested, but not to say recovered, the ogre lifted himself up off your body and pulled out. You wince as he did. Those hard thrusts catching up to you, and suddenly feeling at a loss without him inside you. “I didn’t hurt you, did I?”

You look over to Benimaru, who had apparently seen you flinch, and was looking concerned. “No. Just a little sore.” He looked a little ashamed at that and muttered an apology to you. “Don’t,” you tell him. Reaching on to touch his chest. “It’s not as if I was really complaining.”

You both blush, despite everything you’d just done, still apparently shy about intimacy, before he slid over to you. “Are you sure you’re alright? About everything?”

You nod. Both of you laying on your side to face each other. His fingers caressing your cheek before moving down to the love mark he’d nipped into your skin. “Yes. I meant what I said. I don’t regret it.” You weren’t foolish enough to think that you were going to be instantly happy as husband and wife now. You were basically starting fresh. Starting anew. Though you knew a lot about each other, you had to relearn things and uncover new things as only a spouse would know. It would take time. But you were happy enough for now to at least try to start this new chapter with Benimaru. “You’re not going to kill the envoy before he leaves tomorrow, are you?”

The man let out a boisterous laugh and wrapped his arms tight around you in a hug. “No. I would never disrespect Rimuru-sama like that. As long as he leaves, I’m satisfied. But if he touches you between now and then, I make no promise on the guarantee he will leave with all his limbs.”

“Benimaru….”

The envoy, it seemed, was clever enough to take the hint in not touching you. The murderous aura & killing intent of the red kijin seemingly always just behind you making that clear. You decline his invitation to join him in Blumund. Telling him that the only time you would come to the city to visit him was with your husband. He again took the hint and left without comment. Rimuru-sama gave Benimaru a stern talking to about scaring their allies and ambassadors to their country, but you could also see that he wasn’t very serious about it. He seemed pleased enough that things had worked out, that you were staying, and his beloved friends were happy.

Ever the wonderfully problematic life in Rimuru City.