#arguably drive and not a great cook

[lloydasspound]

Fellow Lloyd enjoyer!! You should share your Lloyd HCs/any other Lloyd/Code Geass stuff you’ve had on your mind but haven’t had an excuse to put out there!

HAIII. HAIIII I have so so sooo many lloyd thoughts that asking me to just pick some is liek a needle in a haystack but ummm ummmmm if we go from most basic hcs to weirder its like.

He is soooo autistic!!! He is aro to mee. He has really bad hearing from being around all these loud ass fighting robots all day (and knows sign language to compensate in his personal life but no one at work bothers bcuz everyone hates him). Absolutely illegible handwriting (ignoring that one time that he has a beautiful signature) but he's kind of not bad at drawing from making blueprints and stuff (but does NOT understand average art bcuz he can't fathom the emotions surrounding it). Overworks himself a lot, although this is literally canon now bcuz of lost stories like WOW all those lines about working through the night until his body forces him to take a nap gave me permanent brain damage!! Similarly, the fact that he gets shakey hands is another hc turned canon in lost stories but they say its bcuz he gets cold I say its bcuz hes ill and tired and killing his body. Also I think he is actually very warm to touch and not cold!!! Ceciles cooking actually tastes great and lloyds just the insane one in the scenario. He is a bit of a history nerd in his free time!!!! (He named his robot lancelot he named his fuckign dream project number 1 robot lancelot like omfg) I think he secretly knows how to pilot a knightmare and has his own pilot suit stashed away, he just doesn't do it bcuz code geass are cowards. He needs glasses but his vision is not that bad!! He's the type to take his glasses off to read/when he's focused (arguably kind offffff confirmed? The one times we've seen him with a book is with his glasses off technically!!! (LLOYD BDAY CARD I LOVE YOU LLOYD BDAY CARD YOU ARE EVERYTHING TO ME.)) Even though he's rich he doesn't really like servants/basically prefers to do everything himself but also he's fuckign shit at taking care of himself so actually nothing gets done and his place is a mess. Subject to migraines occasionally. Cannot drive. His hair is greasy as hell. Kind of bad hygiene but he never smells Bad, he smells very sanitary or like that weird fake metal smell. He needs to be hurled into the sun.

Other Lloyd thoughts include that his lost stories bday card was still very very Good (understatement) and that's never leaving my mind and they should make a 3* of him. His dialouge there sucks tho. I hope he has the most absurd mention in Roze. He does not deserve the amount of in canon hate he gets at all bcuz literally nothing he does is that bad. Miyahara tatsumi lloyd is peak lloyd. I want him to die

There is definitely more but I hope this is enough!!!! xoxo

(I have nothing to say abt code geass bcuz I hate that show this is lloydasspound not codegeasspound♡)

[rolling-restart]

didn't checo marry a teenager and cheat on her in monaco ???

OH here we go now.

Arguably, he is my least favourite driver on the grid for multiple reasons!

So Carola Martinez, his wife, is 25 which makes her 21 in 2018 when they got married. Allegedly, their relationship was public in 2017 and their first child was born in the same year. Which makes Carola a 20-year-old mother. Their actual start of the relationship is unclear but it is simply not giving amazing vibes since they have a 7-year age gap.

Let's continue. Sergio Perez celebrated his sensational 2022 Monaco Grand Prix with a”bad party” where he was snapped dancing body-to-body with an unnamed woman that was not his wife. Additionally, during this event, his youngest child is only two weeks old and it gives me the biggest ick. Even Verstappen's mum was involved in blaming him which is incredibly funny to me

In 2014, Sergio Perez has apologised after making a sexist joke about Susie Wolff's outing for Williams in Friday practice.

The Mexican told Spanish television that he would not like a woman as a team-mate, adding that women were "better to stay in the kitchen".

Perez praised Wolff as a "great driver", but then made the controversial remark, adding: "Imagine being beaten by a woman." in his apology. Lol. Obviously, Susie said "Saw some comments made by Sergio Perez as I was making dinner in the kitchen last night. Please give him a break." on Twitter and then she added. "His comments were taken completely out of context. Anyway, as my family will tell you, I drive better than I cook!"

I can't say I admire how Susie handled it and how those words worked in a particular context but it definitely smells bad to me.

His father, Antonio Perez Garibay, is a well-known politician in his own country, linked to the ruling NGM party of President Andrés Manuel López Obrador. The president has been in power since 2018 and had made promises of tackling corruption and working on curbing the power of drug cartels.

But a section of the Mexicans feels that his governance has not been successful in doing so and therefore dislikes his regime. The poor handling of the Covid-19 pandemic has ignited the rage among the population even more.

I cannot find the source now but someone on Twitter mentioned he is using Sergio's fame to his benefit in his political endeavours. Curious. His party is centre-right to right-wing according to Wikipedia and they promote Liberal conservatism and Christian democracy. Everyone's political taste to themselves but it is an ick for me to be affiliated with a such thing and giving someone a platform in this.

That's it so far. Send it my way if you find anything else!

[sylvanas-girlkisser]

Curious on your thoughts about Halo. There's definitely glorification of military, weapons, soldiers etc. throughout all of it which all feel fascist, but I'm wondering if you're referring to anything in particular? Do you think the games themselves are fascist propaganda or there's fascism and fascist propaganda within the game world, or both?

The immediate slavery I think of is the Spartans as child soldiers. Which early on was definitely portrayed as 'means maybe justified by the ends, also it's cool to be a traumatised machine of war'. But I feel the series became more critical of that as time went on. There's also a few species in the covenant which are arguably slave soldiers. May I ask what you're referring to?

(for context I am one of those longtime fans who played them as kid. but I don't intend to hunt you for sport as you say, or yell at a stranger online. it's also fair if you don't want to respond, so yeah)

I don't think the halo games are fascist propaganda, i.e. that they were created with the intention of making people subscribe to fascist ideology.

Rather I think the games (or at least the 3 I have played so far) utilizes a lot of tropes that originate with, and/or are inherently tied to fascist ideology. The most obvious example to me is of course the entire premise of the games story: that this is about one great man saving all of mankind - and yeah that is like the foundation of all modern action cinema, but the devil is in the detail.

John is a soldier first and only, the trait that allows him to save humanity is his skill at combat. Fascist ideology puts a lot of emphasis on (as Umberto Eco puts it) "action for action's sake", and that is reflected in John. He never has to stop and think things over, or take a step back and talk things through; he's the master chief, he does what need to be done even if other people aren't ready to accept it.

In fascist ideology, critical thinking is the enemy. The world is simple, the answers are simple, they have to be, because if you have to stop and think, you might realize there are answers outside the fascist death cult.

Speaking of the fascist death cult; I remember a lot of people talking about Reach as like a tragedy, but it's not. It's an ode to the ideal of a "good death" that is so central to fascist ideology. Every member of noble squad's death matter (except for Kat cause she's a femoid), they drive the plot forward, they are heroic and they are necessary for the greater good.

The thing to understand about fascism, is that it views war as not just humanity's natural state, but as a desirable state. To fascists, war is about the opportunity to prove yourself a hero, the horror and the suffering war brings is good, because it makes you so much stronger and honorable for rising above it.

One of the ways you see this in halo is by the fact that civilians are basically non-existent except as number of casualties, or as a politicians standing in the way of the soldiers doing what needs to be done to save the world (e.g. with the prophets in the arbiter campaign of halo 2) - The people on the street are never given, except at the begining of Reach when a few take up arms against the covenant. Artists, cooks, office workers, all of these don't matter under fascism, and they don't matter in halo.

I could go on talking about how the B-plot of halo 2, with the honorable warrior race (species) having their authority taken away and being replaced by a brutish, animalistic and dishonorable race (species) by sly politicians; mirror a narrative pushed by right wing extremists in the west regarding immigration.

Or how the covenant, despite occasional surface-level attempts to humanize them, are basically the exact kind of "ideal enemy" fascism is hungering for: someone who looks nothing like us, is dogmatically committed to our destruction, and who despite having all the odds stacked in their favor, are no match for our, for lack of a better word "moxie".

Also, lets not forget that the covenant is heavily defined by it's diversity, being many different people united under one ideology. Yes some of them were forcefully indicted into this ideology, notably the grunts/ungoids. But you only learn that by finding a bit of lore squirreled away off the beaten path in one level. The first thing you see looking at the covenant is "these are all different people who don't look like me, and i have to defeat them".

And like, as I have been trying to emphasize throughout: I don't think Halo is deliberately fascist propaganda. I think its a case of fascist ideology filtering down in a self-perpetuating loop through the media that becomes popular in the US (and other places). When coming up with John's backstory and characterization, bungie (i hope) didn't set out to create the fascist ideal of a person; they set out to create someone who would fit in, in a game first and foremost about empowering the player through violence. They don't spend time on introspection, or trying to find non-violent solutions, because they don't want to slow the plot down so the people who are just here to shoot aliens lose interest.

Which is kinda what makes fascism so devious right? That it has wormed its way so thoroughly into society, through the glorification of war, that I have to spend an hour and a half; and sappho knows how many words, to give a surface level explanation of the way it's expressed through one of the most popular media franchises of the new millenium.

Likely not because the creators meant to, but because they were writing the kind of story they were used to reading.

[thetoxicgamer]

Kings without crowns: Alliance Hakis and Yuki think ALGS Split 2 Playoffs is their time

As the circle closed in around the circular structures that dominate The Mill on Storm Point, Alliance weren’t exactly in a great spot. Their Seer had been knocked in the chaos of the final closing zone, and while Newcastle could revive him, their Valkyrie was sent to the spectator screen and the freshly standing Seer was immediately stuck by a stray arc star. They kept their composure, however, with one thing going for them: all the teams around them were fighting, too. As a duo, the Newcastle and Seer managed to return to full health, driving an advancing team back and into the sights of yet another squad. They poked and prodded at both the remaining teams, forcing them to fight and looking for trades, before their relentless pressure and the closing zone finally forced one team into the open and the other into a desperation swing through the devastating final circle. As those last few opponents fell, the final screen told the biggest story there was to tell about the ALGS Regional Final in EMEA: Alliance cemented their status as kings of Europe. Alliance’s Apex Legends squad have earned every bit of their reputation in the battle royale. They’re the best team in Europe and are one of the world’s most consistent squads. They have arguably the best IGL in the ALGS, John “Hakis” Håkansson, flanked by big-moment machine Oscar “Yuki” Jiang, and one of the most fearsome controller players to emerge internationally in the last year, Miron “Effect” Novikov. As such, they’re no strangers to winning tournaments big or small. But one title still eludes them: LAN champions. The ALGS Split Two Playoffs, beginning on July 13, will be Alliance’s latest chance to finally win their ALGS crowns, and the team isn’t lacking in confidence heading into the event. In an interview with Dot Esports, Hakis and Yuki exuded both confidence and comfort with their team’s position. Finally able to play with their full team without needing to worry about visa issues and assured in their flexible team compositions, there’s no doubt what the goal is for Alliance this LAN. “I think now, with the addition of Effect, we have nothing other than first place,” Yuki told Dot Esports when asked about Alliance’s expectations for the Split Two Playoffs. “I believe we have every single ingredient we need to cook.” It’s difficult to argue with him that Effect might just be the missing ingredient that Alliance need to secure their LAN victory. The controller fragger was far and away the most dangerous player in EMEA during Split Two of the Pro League, leading the region with an astounding 114 kills. Only one player all season had more in either split of the Pro League anywhere in the world, with Crazy Raccoon’s Song “Ras” Hong-gyun notching 118 in Split One. Visa issues kept the Russia native from competing in the Split One Playoffs earlier this year, and while the team finished fifth with an admirable performance from substitute Mikkel “Mande” Hestbek, it’s easy to wonder what might have been had the team been at full strength. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NSZpjQxEPsM “He is much stronger than what everyone thinks he is,” Yuki said. “I know everyone thinks he’s already very strong, but he has never played at LAN before. And I feel like that’s where players prove themselves. It’s a big opportunity for Effect to show people how strong he truly is.” Hakis agreed with Yuki’s assessment, noting that with Effect on the team, Alliance can simply choose to fight any team they want to, as opposed to shying away from more difficult engagements. The IGL also noted how much more aggressive Alliance are with Effect on the team, and how that aggression becomes a tool for the squad to secure more points for themselves: “We have the opportunity to take more fights, and get away with more fights.” And Hakis is used to calculating how to best use every tool at his disposal. Much has been made of his military background in the Swedish army on ALGS broadcasts when discussing his leadership capabilities. But his success as an IGL is more than just confidence and communication. In his methodical breakdown of different characters and team comps for Dot Esports, it became clear that his multifaceted understanding of Apex is vital to Alliance’s success. Over the last split, that combination of confidence and understanding of the team’s strengths and playstyle has led to many different off-kilter team compositions, from helping lead the charge in popularizing Rampart among ALGS teams to using characters that have fallen out of favor with many teams in recent times, like Newcastle and Ash. “I just think that we have such an established playstyle. We know what we do no matter what. So for us, the comp doesn’t really matter that much,” Hakis told Dot Esports when asked about Alliance’s unique team comps. It’s not necessarily about what legend is or is not “meta,” he says, but what characters best help play to his team’s strengths. The Alliance Rampart composition is a perfect example. Catalyst’s rise defined much of the second split in the ALGS in several regions, and Hakis agreed that Catalyst is “extremely good” but that Alliance doesn’t like to play buildings where Catalyst’s passive and tactical abilities are strongest. The team prefers to play in open fields and on the edge of the zone instead. Since the team’s playstyle didn’t fit Catalyst’s kit, the legend wasn’t useful to them despite how strong she could be. For Hakis, Rampart was simply “more useful” to Alliance more often in their games. Newcastle is another interesting character Alliance may pull out during the LAN, and he’s one that they use differently than most. Often thought of as a passive character tied to Wattson in the middle of the circle, Alliance uses Newcastle to help them play from the edge of zones. “Newcastle is one of those characters that are versatile in how you want to play him and how you want to pair them,” Hakis said. “So basically, if you play Wattson then you can play zone early, and you can set up and basically make places easier to hold. But when you’re playing him edge, then you need to play him as a space-taking character that has extra mobility.” For Hakis, Newcastle’s ultimate and the distances it can quickly traverse make him a more aggressive character for finding off-angles during engagements, with further support offered to teammates by throwing his Mobile Shield tactical to help during fights. And if you take plenty of fights like Alliance do on Newcastle, he also comes with a safety valve thanks to his full range of shielding abilities: “He helps you be consistent because you can reset more often if you fuck up.” https://twitter.com/theAllianceGG/status/1655336635813306370 Those off-meta picks that Alliance have become known for might just be what the team needs to combat more popular compositions, like Catalyst or another legend that continues to enjoy dominance in ALGS: Seer. Despite changes many thought would be nerfs to Seer that got rid of his healing and revive-canceling abilities, Hakis joined the chorus of ALGS pros who think Seer might just be even stronger than he was before. He described the recon character as “still incredibly broken,” and while the nerfs to Seer’s passive were nice in his opinion, the new slow caused by the tactical ability was a buff, in Hakis’ opinion. He also doesn’t think the nerf to Seer’s Exhibit ultimate was of much consequence at all: “I think, overall, he’s about the same strength, might be slightly stronger than before even.” Whatever team compositions Alliance choose, consistency has always been one of their calling cards. And it will be that same consistency in their results that they rely on to win the Split Two Playoffs. Because according to them? There shouldn’t be anyone that can stop them. “In terms of a team that we fear… I really don’t see anybody on our level,” Yuki said. He did mention Japanese squad NAKED as a team that have done quite well in international scrims and surprised some of the more established players. But the only teams he seemed concerned about were teams that might contest Alliance at their preferred landing POIs. And even then, he’s not losing any sleep over them. “Anybody that contests us is a little bit of competition because they’re the ones who could change our direction and where we want to go,” Yuki said. “But they’re not really competition. They’re moreso a nuisance, I’d say. Which we’ll take care of.” Read the full article

[melbournenewsvine]

We left the food on the table and ran to a place with a sauce so good that I licked it with Flip Flip

Squid tentacles are a staple in dim sum wagons. Many are tough, cold, and soggy with grease. On the other hand, they were tender, hot, tossed in a crunchy, barely crushed batter and seasoned with chili powder and salt. A pinch of salt would be helpful but I can’t complain. Most importantly it was still good 10-15 minutes later, when we chose the dish. Wok fried radish was not a dish I would order at a dim sum until I first ate it at 8 at 8 On The Point about four or five years ago, which was the last time we visited. Epiphany? No, but damn close. The squid tentacles were excellent.attributed to him:Rob Broadfield It is served with XO sauce, which is arguably Hong Kong’s greatest gift to the world. XO 8 is fine. The ingredients for this luxurious sauce are expensive. Believe it or not, top-grade dried scallops and shrimp are much more expensive than the fresh stuff. It would make sense for many restaurants to lighten up on seafood ingredients. I wouldn’t say they have it at 8 On The Point, but their version lacks the big umami punch that the pricey XO provides, and there are no forbidden restrictions. Having said that, I’m still licking it off. The fresh king prawn dumplings were the pinnacle of dumpling building. The wrappers were soft and smooth, yet firm enough to give a good chew. The shrimp filling was chunky – not too pastey – and had great flavours, but it was also light. loading Shanghai dumplings – handcrafted at 8 On The Point – are those soupy creations we struggle with. One should lift it up into a ceramic spoon, nibble a slit from the bottom and allow the hot soup to creep into the spoon from where it can be sipped. This technique ensures that you will not suffer a third-degree burn if you pop everything in your mouth and blow it up. ouch. The soup was clear, clean and crunchy with flavour. The meatball inside was soft, not the hard rom of excessive stuffing one gets so often. The smell of beef and the good spices tamed the nose and then the palate. Immediately. Other examples of dumplings are steamed shrimp and chives. We often forget that the dumpling wrap is the most important part of the dish (in the same way that pasta is more important than sauce in Italian cooking) and these were examples of steaming. A few tips: The dim sum menu is huge, which means many dishes don’t hit the gigs. Get the menu, look at your favorite dishes, and order them from the waiting staff. We, for example, love those big, floppy, napkin-sized, thick squares of steamed rice casings wrapped around an array of sauces and fillings. They are in the rice paper rolls section of the dim sum menu. The beef and cilantro version is slippery and big oh my gosh! create flavour. Rich flavors in the restaurant overlooking the river.attributed to him:Rob Broadfield We are a fan of this amazing and amazing Dim Sum restaurant. Served across the board with flavor, variety, and friendly and fast service. Eight is the luckiest number for the Chinese. 8 On The Point is fortunate that they care about their product and, at least in our opinion, do more than Dim Sum shows in Perth. 8 in point 306 Riverside Drive, East Perth 08 9221 22888onthepoint.com.au Dim Sum Open: Mon-Fri, 11am-2:30pm; Saturday – Sunday, 10 AM – 2:30 PM. A la carte dinner 7 days from 5:30 pm. Prices (dim sum): $4.90 – $17.50 per dish. Accessibility facilities for the disabled. If you like this try: Silks at Crown Perth. 15/20 Source link Originally published at Melbourne News Vine

[yanderenightmare]

could we get the bnha yanderes with a darling that’s actually really fond of their dark side and revels in the attention

yandere ! BNHA headcannons

TIP-JAR

goodiebag WARNINGS: anxiety, arson, drugs, guilt, delusions, kidnapping, Stockholm syndrome, mind control, DUBCON, yandere-themes

BAKUGO KATSUKI - KACHAN

He had planned to be sweet, similar to his scent of caramel as opposed to what destruction he was capable of. He had planned to be patient, to tolerate whatever screams and cries his darling might have reacted with, but what he was met with wasn’t horror, but… something strangely akin to what he would call gratitude or even excitement or even lovesickness. He thinks she surprised herself more than she surprised him with how easy she folded, but once he got over the shock and not to mention the suspicion her compliant nature beckoned from him, he was only motivated to go harder, to be rougher, to be as intense as he had wished but had held back. She likes the attention, despite it being overwhelming and scary and brutal at times, she still likes it, maybe even because of it. Once he got over the fear of her acceptance crushing under the full weight of his obsession, he became cocky about it. She’s his little freak and he has the confidence and the reassurance to tease her for it now, thoroughly amused with how her eyes cross paths and her brows knit together, drooling and mewling with his hand wrapped around her throat, squeezing her neck with her tight little pussy clenching around his shaft as he drives into her. He exploits it, finding such great amusement and entertainment in hearing her pray for him to go harder and faster, even as she begins to cry, limbs shaking as she continues to beg for him, eyes like opium, wide and void with pooling darkness.

DABI - TODOROKI TOUYA

Dabi had expectations. Expecting his little darling to not fully be at peace with his self-proclaimed ownership of her, he had decided to not pay her objections any mind. He decided that the hard way was the best way from the very start. But… his darling didn’t meet him with the type of reluctance he had expected. Sure, she was crying, but when he reached out his hand she didn’t bite like the sort of animal he’d expected, but rather, reached out ever so timidly and eyes so wide and glossy and sparkly and in search for some comfort. He couldn’t be harsh when she was being so sweet, he couldn’t be anything but appreciative when she curled up on his lap like such a soft little thing, hands gripping onto his shirt, sobs that seemed too tame for him to scold her, besides… it felt… nice. It felt nice to be the source of comfort as opposed to the factor of discomfort. It felt like absolution. He used to think he’d find clinginess annoying, but his little darling is clingy in all the right ways. Latching onto him when she’s crying, after a bad dream, all throughout the night, even when he’s the source to her pain, when he makes her jump up and down on his cock, her arms wrapped around his neck, fingers intertwining in his raven locks, legs around his torso, running to hug and welcome him home, kissing him, telling him how she missed him, how much she loves him, how much she needs him.

SHIGARAKI TOMURA

He’s so confused. He kidnapped her. Kidnapped her. Took her, abducted her, stole her, forced her away from a life with little regard to her feelings on the whole ordeal, subjugated her to a tiny room with more flying specs of dust than light allowed to shine through the windows. It’s not even like he’s a handsome kidnapper either. Is she insane? Why is she looking at him like that? Why isn’t she afraid, why isn’t she swatting his hands away when he reaches to touch her? Why is she touching him? How can she touch his wrinkles, his scars, his cracking breaking skin? How can she touch his hands, his scarred deadly bloodied hands? And what is that look on her face? If he didn’t know any better he’d call it fascination, curiosity perhaps… adoration? No. No, no, no, no way. No way she’s simply just… accepting… enjoying… just as simple as that. To be honest, he’s feeling slightly freaked out, alarmed, concerned. This isn’t natural. This isn’t healthy. She should at least cry, if only just a little bit. But no. No, her fingers playing curiously with his hair when he’s playing videogames. At least she doesn’t talk to him like they’re chummy old pals, then he’d really feel the thin hairs at the back of his neck rise. But, when he touches her milky skin with his sandpaper-fingertips she doesn’t squirm, and when he pushes those same fingers knuckle deep inside her she doesn’t tell him to stop. He finds himself quickly enjoying testing the boundaries of his little darling, boundaries he’s yet to have found proof of.

SHINSO HITOSHI

He was expecting for there to be some debate surrounding his ownership of her, he was preparing to teach his little pet a thing or two about who was boss early on, but… she seemed to slip right into her role so naturally. Instead of him teasing her, she’s teasing him, mocking him, making him feel as though he has no control even as he stares into those wide milky orbs who no longer have the ability of mobility, yet still has the power to inch her lips into that eerie playful catlike grin, as though she’s excited, as though spiked with untamed thrill. She’ll talk to him as though there’s no danger, as though he won’t have her mind in his clutches by the end of it, almost as if she’s counting on it, waiting for it, coaxing him with words of her own. They’ll play like cat and mouse, one always either tempting or chasing the other. She’ll even laugh, eyes bright and vivid and spiked and twirling as she lets him catch her time and time again, in a way that makes him believe he’s the one that’s been captured. He’s surprised, to say the least, surprised because his little darling is in fact a little devil, a little baby-faced angel-eyed demon, who enjoys how the darkness feels against her skin, who loves how his inky-fingers feel when tampering with her mind, and has darkness of her own to drown him with too.

TAKAMI KEIGO - HAWKS

He was preparing for a wild beast, but was happy to find his little darling settling in as though she understood that in the comfort of his house is where she belonged. Calling it a kidnapping became weird and sounded foreign when referring to their arrangement, especially when he came home to his darling in her apron, cooking, cleaning or sleeping so soundly on his couch you’d think she’d done so her whole life. She doesn’t flinch when he touches her, she rather leans in to greet the touch, her eyes heavy-lidded and joined with his gaze. And when he comes home, some days all broken and bruised and bloodied and smoke-ridden, his feathers ragged and plucked, she’ll fuss. Fuss and pamper and coo and take such good care of him, softly and sweetly patching him up, messaging wings, give his torn lip a kiss, stroke a careful hand through his locks. She’ll be so perfect, like an angel, a living breathing real-life angel. Or a guardian, something he’s always wanting. Someone to make him feel safe and loved and protected, despite him being the hero and his darling being the victim to his villainy.

MIDORIYA IZUKU - DEKU

Here he was thinking she couldn’t possibly be any more of an adorable little darling than what she already was. He’s not used to being wrong about his calculations, he’s not used to liking finding faults in his calculations, but he has to admit he was pleasantly surprised with how his darling accepted his feelings easier than what he had expected. He had assumed it to be a lengthy and gradual and careful process, he was prepared to take his time, be patient, be supportive, but… his darling portrayed little of what anxiety symptoms he had imagined: panic-attacks, quaking, crying, screaming. She seemed more honored than anything. Amazed to have caught the eye of the Midoriya Izuku, the number 1. Hero of not just Japan, but arguably the whole world. She felt proud, bashful to be getting the attention, but thriving in it despite herself believing it was misplaced. Wanting to return Izuku’s worship, cherish, awe with appreciation of her own at every given turn. She would still yelp when he picked her up to carry her about, but who wouldn’t when his arms are the sizes of pillars. Though, the sound of surprise would always be followed by the sound of laughter, school-girl giggles that felt like the fluttering of butterflies against his chest. Also, when she slept on top of him. With one of his hands placed on the dome of her ass and the other holding a book up for him to read, the small feel of her drumming pitter patter heartbeats against his ribcage, so cute and comfortable and safe.

CHISAKI KAI - OVERHAUL 

He was expecting a fight, he was expecting annoying migraine-evoking screams, he was expecting thrashing, causing waves to fall onto the bathroom tiles when she was in the bathtub. He was expecting the worst, because that’s what good business men do: expect the worst, prepare for the worst, and find refuge in the fact that it was far from what hell they had imagined. But… it’s rare to be met with the exact opposition of what you had predicted, which was what had happened. There was no war, there was no fight, there was no riot, there wasn’t even the hint of resistance. There were still small tremors of fear though, yet far less than what he had foreseen. The type of fear you find when bringing home a new pet, more careful hesitant curiosity than actual fear, as though trying to find comfort in your surroundings, as though trying to settle in. He looks like a dangerous man, yet… her eyes aren’t terror-wide but big with anticipation, with a strange form of thrill. And though her actions remained feather-light she was still the first one to reach out, she was still the one to ask to witness the demolition and recreation of his quirk, she was still the one that chose to tie the knot to his tie in the morning. Though he was the one to have found and taken her, she was the pioneer.

TODOROKI SHOTO

Not much can change what Shoto has planned for his darling’s future. Whether she enjoys it or hates it, it will be accepted. What he plans to do with her, what soft-tinted or red-violent passions he plans on bestowing upon her, the fact that she likes it from the start hardly matters when through time she was going to learn to enjoy it anyway. He was always going to lick up her skin with his flames or make her skin whisper upon the threat of being frozen, until she’s a sweat-slicked feverish mess in his lap, and he was always going to take good soft care of her afterwards. But, he must admit, he’s surprised to find that the aftercare is such a sweet pleasure, seemingly rivaling what blissed-out state he can reach when playing with his little darling. He knew he would enjoy it, but… he could never have imagined the motherly touch his darling gifts him with, what tender smiles and heavenly laughs and the way she tangles herself with him, limbs an unruly yet comfortable knot. What more, when she asks to see his quirks, wants him to make frost-flowers on the windows or in the shower on the glass-walls, when she holds his hands as he creates little lanterns of dancing tendrils and wisps, ones she can tickle with her fingertips as they twirl in his palm. The way her eyes light up with that childlike-wonder he never seemed to possess when he was young, makes him feel a different type of warm far from burning.

TIP-JAR

[ilooklikeaburntchickenugget]

Womanizer

A/N: I’m actually doing Chris Evans fan-fic on this account now. So here you guys go. Pairing: Ransom Drysdale x F!Reader Word count: 1,819 Warnings: Very, very lightly dark Ransom, if you even consider it dark. 

To Ransom, you were everything.

The two of you hadn't spoken more than a dozen words to each other, only having had a few interactions at these various events and galas the elite class had to attend. You would ignore him, mingling around everyone else. But most importantly, other men.

He eyed you like a vulture. He was discreet about it, making sure to memorize the patterns of when you would look around, clearly out of boredom, and diverting his eyes elsewhere or back to the meaningless conversations he participated in. He would swirl his vodka in his small cup, filled with ice in a race against time so it wouldn’t water down to distract himself from your figure that stood no more than 15 feet away from him.

He noticed exactly how your drinks went: you would start out with champagne, finishing it. You would move onto red wine, only drinking half. He knew it was out of sake for your sobriety. You were smart. Then you would move onto whisky. He saw you down one a few times, and smirked to himself. You could drink hard liquor, that said something about you as a woman.

You were nothing alike the girls he would bring home for a one night stand. No, he wanted to put a ring on you. He would buy other girls some Cartier bracelet or a Prada bag for their cheap endeavors with him, but since the day he first saw you he knew you were his.

He had spent an entire night looking you up on Google. Finding your occupation as an English professor at an Ivy League school, to your academic essays. And of course, he found your Pinterest board. Because he knew damn well every woman had a Pinterest board for their wedding.

He noticed what you had saved, multiple photos of huge diamond rings, emerald cut. Classy and glamorous, it fit you. The very next day he went out to Tiffany’s, and bought a ring just like it. He knew your ring size, just from eyeballing your sleek hand. He had bought meaningless rings for dozens of other women, he was a pro at this point.

And in his lower desk drawer in his personal office, sat the blue box that he one day hoped to drop on one knee and grant you with, an official bond between you two that as of right now, he could only dream of. But he would do everything in his power to make sure it happened.

He noticed how other men looked at you, sleazy eyed with the most disgusting intentions. Sure, he wanted to take you home. But he wanted to keep you there, with him. He wanted you to be his, and only his. Forever, and ever.

“Mr. Drysdale,” His thoughts drowned in wonderland were ripped from him, disrupted by one of the investors in his publishing company.

“Mr. Peterson.” He tightly smiled, holding out his free hand to shake with the other man. His insides were burning with a fire of annoyance at this man, having to put on a stupid, nice face for him. He wanted no more than to find you, and start a conversation with you. 

He continued to look over the older man’s shoulder, only for a few moments at a time, catching a few glances of your gorgeous smile, your elegant being. It was the only thing keeping him sane.

“I should probably introduce you to some of my colleagues, other investors.” Mr. Peterson mentioned, “Follow me, they’re right over here.” “Oh, there’s no need-” Ransom tried to reason, an attempt to get away the talkative man who was arguably a nobody compared to the various others who had invested more from their pocketbooks than he had in his entire bank account.

“No, I insist.” He waved Ransom on, to which the brunette tightly smiled again, and with great reluctance followed.

He guided his way through the crowds and groups of people talking, their expensive clothes and obnoxious laughs making Ransom more irritable by the second. He could feel his anger rise to a slow boil, his ability to contain himself slimming by the moment. Then he saw it.

He saw you, standing there in that form-shaping dress of an emerald green, with a kind smile on your face. You, too, were talking to these so-called investors. His temperature dropped immediately, an inaudible sigh escaping his lips as his once forced smile turned into a natural one. One by one he was introduced to the various men, dressed in stupidly expensive suits that didn’t even fit, until your name came around, “And Y/N Y/L/N.” Mr. Peterson smiled, “English professor at Cornell, and published author.” You smiled at him, holding out your hand to which he shook.

Oh, how soft your hands were. It was like a cloud, he felt your elegant fingers grasping in his, the various rings on your fingers felt cold against his warmed skin. “I believe we’ve met before, Mr. Drysdale.” You spoke up.

“I believe so, Ms. Y/L/N,” He smiled, “And please, Ransom is just fine.” You nodded in agreement.

The conversation began, investors talking about money and bets, traditional things, finally Ransom’s company came up. “You have a publishing company, correct, Mr. Drysdale?” Your boss, Mr. Hart spoke, to which he nodded.

“Yes, my grandfather’s publishing company, I inherited it.” He took a sip of his drink.

“It’s doing well, I see?” Another asked and he nodded.

“Very well, yes,” He replied.

“And you, too, are an author?” A third asked, the questions becoming annoying to him. He nodded.

“That was how I inherited the company,” He began, “I released my first book and it got some press, sold a few copies, Harlan saw that I could take over his company and gave it to me.” “What is this book called?” Mr. Peterson asked, his clueless mind elsewhere.

“A Wrath for One Another,” You spoke up, his head turning to you and eyes shooting open wide in shock, “It’s a phenomenal piece, truly.”

“Why thank you.” He smiled at you, his mind still in a state of complete shock over your knowledge of his work.

“Well, we may just have to include that in the curriculum,” Mr. Hart smirked, sliding his hand to the small of your back. You knew he was tipsy, he always tried to flirt with you, physically, when he was like this.

“Well,” You spoke up, “If you would have read my plan for the curriculum at the beginning of this last semester, you would have seen I included that very book in the plan.” Most of the men around you nearly choked on their drinks, Ransom chuckling under his breath with a smile at how easily you dominated the man and the entire conversation. “Now, if all of you will excuse me, I must excuse myself with Mr. Drysdale to talk with him further about his works.” You removed yourself from your boss’ grasp with grace, walking over to Ransom and glancing only once before walking past his frame, which was quite a lot larger than yours. He stopped for a moment, getting the memo before following you, yet still unsure about what to do.

The two of you found a nearly silent corner in one of the rooms of this mansion, gold rimmed with old furniture, only a few guests lingering about in quiet conversation. “So,” Ransom was the first to speak up, you leaning against the wall and taking a sip of your whisky, “You’ve read my book, huh?” “Of course I have,” You coyly smiled, “Anyone who is actually within the modern world of literature has.” He sighed very lightly.

“You’re right.” You nodded, a few seconds of silence lingering between the two of you.

“I apologize that I took you out of the conversation, I just had the feeling that you didn’t want to be there either.” “Am I really that easy to read?” He asked you with a slight smile. “Eh,” You smiled back, “A little.”

“Well,” He began, “You are quite the woman-” “If you’re trying to get me in bed my answer is a firm no.” You rolled your eyes knowing too much about the playboy, something he too knew.

“That was not necessarily the plan.” “Necessarily?” You asked, looking at him and squinting your eyes in confusion, “Then what, pray tell, was the plan?”

“Well, it was to ask you out to dinner, get to know you better, go on a few dates and see how things go.” He began.

“Hugh Drysdale taking a woman out on a date?” You scoffed, “Hilarious.” “I mean it.” He fought right back.

“I’m sure that’s what you tell all your girls.” “But I would never do that to a woman.” He began, looking you up and down, “I know you’re smart, smarter than me if we’re both being honest, but I also know you drive me insane whenever I see you at these completely pointless events.” “Oh?” You asked, this time downing your drink, “And how would I know you don’t say that to all your other girls?”

“Because I know you love dogs, you’ve had three of them in your lifetime. I know you love to cook, your favorite thing to make is homemade pasta carbonara, and I know your favorite author is Hemingway, specifically his short stories, something that tells me enough about you to know that you’re a smart minded woman who can think outside of the box but within reasonable perimeters.” He responded all in one breath, leaving you breathless. You stared up at him confused and dazed, like a deer in the headlights.

“How did you know all that?” You asked, turning to him, this time seriously, “Are you stalking me.” “Stalking is a strong word,” He stated, your face turning to more panic which he noticed, “Oh please, no, I’m not stalking you in any way. I just overhear your conversations, wanting to know more about you.” It wasn’t a complete lie. “So eavesdropping?” You reiterated with a sigh.

“If you would like to use that word, then I suppose.” You held the small glass cup loosely within your fingers as you rolled your eyes again.

“Fine.” You sighed out, “One date. That’s it. But, no touching unless I say so. I don’t want to hear you brag about yourself, it gets obnoxious to a point where I get waves of nausea,” He couldn’t help but scoff, “And no talking about work. I’m sick and tired of people thinking it’s my only personality trait.” “Deal.” He agreed with a nod.

“Now,” You sighed, taking his hand very lightly in yours, “Back to old men staring at my boobs.” He lightly chuckled with a smirk.

“You do have nice boobs,” He said, to which you whipped your head around and gave him a grimace, “Respectfully.”

[thegreenwolf]

(This post was originally posted on my blog at https://thegreenwolf.com/its-okay-to-not-hustle/)

There’s this meme going around Facebook right now, saying “If you don’t come out of this quarantine with a new skill, your side hustle started, or more knowledge, you never lacked time. You lacked discipline.” Thankfully multiple people have already skewered it, but it continues to be shared around by the sort of person who is trying to one-up everyone else, or who’s just plain clueless–or, for that matter, just trying to guilt you into buying whatever they’re selling.

Now, there’s not a damned thing wrong with self-promotion. That’s how indie artists, authors, and other self-employed folks get the word out. You have to be able to talk good talk in order to get people’s attention. But leading with this meme? Guilting people for not leaping from sudden unemployment straight into the thick of the ever-shifting gig economy? That ain’t gonna fly, Brocephus.

You Have Good Reasons to Slack

Excuse me while I dust off my counseling psych degree a sec, here. *ahem* We are in a very sensitive, turbulent time right now. We’re in the middle of a pandemic, the likes of which hasn’t been seen in a century in the Western world. We are in a hugely traumatizing situation here. Not just for the financial losses, but the fact that COVID-19 has killed thousands of people and left many more with permanent lung damage. We still haven’t gotten a handle yet on exactly how contagious this thing is, how long you’re contagious for, or whether you’re immune once you’ve had it, assuming you survive. We don’t have adequate testing, emergency rooms estimate that for every positive test there are 10-20 people out there infected and untested, and everyone with a cough is suddenly Schroedinger’s COVID case. Governments worldwide are slow to react in spite of the rising death toll. People have had friends and family die horribly from this thing in a short period of time. Even people who didn’t already have issues with anxiety, depression and other mental illnesses are feeling stressed, strained and scared–and, yes, traumatized. This image is guilt-tripping people who are actively being traumatized.

So we’re already starting with a populace that is dealing with this collective trauma, as well as whatever personal trauma each individual is experiencing. Not always easy to seize the day when you’re going through that. And I can think of a few other reasons that might further complicate this whole “Just get a side gig!” thing:

–They’re a parent who suddenly has all their kids at home, all the time, demanding time and attention and food, AND they still have to work eight hours a day from home, or maybe even more if their S.O. is unemployed/sick/etc. By the way, if someone trots out Isaac Newton or William Shakespeare or some other historical guy who managed to do epic things during a pandemic, remember that they usually had wives or servants to do all the laundry and cooking and cleaning and (if applicable) childcare for them.

–They’re disabled or chronically ill, and don’t have the ability/energy/etc. to just go and make something happen, just like that. Imagine if you just randomly got the fatigue from a really bad flu, and you never knew whether it was going to last a day or a month. And if you tried exerting yourself when you were feeling better, chances are you’d slip back into fatigue-land. That’s what a lot of my chronically ill/etc. friends have to deal with, to say nothing of issues with accessibility of resources for starting a side gig.

–They don’t have any money for the supplies needed to start a side hustle, or the supplies have been hoarded by hobbyists preparing for a Pandemic Staycation.

–They don’t have the skills for something that just requires what they already have (like, for example, writing on a laptop you already happen to own). Often these skills are things that can’t be perfected in a few weeks at home, but may take years to develop before they’re really marketable–like, for example, the skill to make a decent living on side hustles.

–They have anxiety, depression or other mental health conditions that make it hard to function even in the best of times, but even moreso in this…well…mess. Even people who were mentally healthy before are going to be developing diagnosable anxiety and depression disorders before all’s said and done. And speaking from personal experience, those of us who look successful on the outside can still be internally hamstrung by these conditions at times.

–Plus there’s the fact that we’re not supposed to, you know, leave our homes, which narrows down the field of potential side gigs by a lot.

Even doing something less financially-wrought like learning a new skill or subject takes time, energy, and sometimes money, any or all of which may be scarce for the reasons above and more.

Comparison is the Thief of Joy

I am saying all of this as someone who is arguably an expert on the side gig. I have spent the past eight and a half years 100% self-employed (and a lot longer doing it part-time) as an author and artist, able to cover all my bills and expenses, and for a time I was the primary breadwinner of a multi-person household. I have like ten different things I was doing for a living before this all hit, a pretty diverse set of streams of income, even if most of them just up and evaporated in the past few weeks. And while I’m definitely a hell of a lot leaner now than I was a month ago, I still have my head above water for the moment. So I think I know side gigs.

I’m one of the lucky ones. I’m overall healthy. I have a dog who is a lot less demanding of my time than kids would be. I have my own space where I can focus more or less without interruption. More importantly, I have the skills, the knowhow, the drive and the personality to go out and seek new opportunities. And I’m used to fluctuations in income, though admittedly this one’s unprecedented. Don’t gauge yourself by where I am now. I’ve spent twenty-two years building up my art business, my first book came out in 2006, and I’ve had a series of really good opportunities come my way that I had the privilege to be able to make the most of. I am not your measuring stick, so don’t say “Well, if she can do it why can’t I? I must suck!”

If you’re feeling crappy because you aren’t hopping to it and carpeing the diem and getting everything done, here’s what I have to say to you: Look, you just had your world turned upside-down. Job loss, scarce commodities, sudden lack of outside childcare, restricted movement and inability to be around much of your support system, and did I mention a pandemic is happening, too? Any single one of those things would be difficult for just about anyone to deal with, never mind all at once. And I don’t even know what all else has already been going on in your life–unstable or unsafe living situation, other health issues, breakups and other losses, interpersonal conflicts. You know, normal life stuff.

You’re Not Lazy, or Screwing Up, or (Gods Forbid) Undisciplined

It is totally okay if all you’re doing right now is surviving. It’s okay if you feel like you’re drowning, overwhelmed by all that’s happening both on a global level and more personally. It’s okay if all you can manage right now is to get out of bed and stumble through each day a moment at a time, struggling with a tidal wave of emotions. It’s okay if you’re just trying to keep your kids busy, dealing with a crowded home every single day, or trying to keep COVID-19 at bay. It’s okay if, instead of firing up DuoLingo or opening an Etsy shop, you spend your evenings vegging to Netflix or reading a book or playing hours and hours of Animal Crossing.

Not every moment in your life has to be about being productive even in the best of circumstances, and that goes exponentially so right now. Be patient with yourself, and be kind. You may be one of those folks who literally has to spend all their time scrabbling to try to cover the bills or get some leeway from bill collectors, and you have to dedicate your waking time hunting for resources just to try to get through this week. Believe me, I feel for you, I have a lot of friends in that situation right now, and I hope all of you can find some relief and assistance.

May I suggest something? If you have the energy for something more than the bare essentials of getting by, put that energy toward self-care, whatever you can manage under the circumstances. You can use it to recuperate, to rebuild your emotional and physical resilience. That way if things get rough again in the future, you have more internal reserves to build on. If your usual methods don’t work or aren’t accessible due to lockdown, ask others what they’re doing to keep themselves grounded in this trying time.

Just because you have more time doesn’t mean you don’t have to throw yourself right into something productive! Don’t feel pressured to just go-go-go the moment you have a little freedom to move. If you do decide you want to try a side gig, or a new skill, or learn all about some specialized topic of interest, go for it! If you have the energy and attention and opportunity to pursue something new, it can be a great coping skill during this traumatic time. Just don’t pressure yourself; keep it fun.

One last thing: I want you to save the image I have at the top of this post. And then if you see someone post that meme, saying “Come on, you lazy bums, get up and make that side gig happen! Learn new stuff! Do all the things! No excuses!” you pull out this version, and you look at the edits, you remember that it’s okay to be where you are, and you get back to doing things at your own pace no matter what someone else says. (I find visualizing stapling a printout of the edited version to the offender’s forehead to also be therapeutic, but that may just be me.)

Hang in there, okay? It’s going to be a rough time, but you’re not alone, and what you’re feeling right now is shared by so many people. So just let yourself be where you are in this moment, and we’ll see what hope tomorrow brings. And remember that whatever you’re capable of in this moment: it’s enough.

Did you enjoy this post? Please consider supporting my work on Patreon, buying my books here on my website, buying my art and books on Etsy, or tipping me at Ko-fi!

[stewblog]

ROADRUNNER: A FILM ABOUT ANTHONY BOURDAIN

Roadrunner: A Film About Anthony Bourdain, for the majority of its nearly two-hour runtime, is an often moving, warts-and-all portrait of a complex man who both was and was not the personality that millions watched travel the world.

Director Morgan Neville’s film gives a largely unbridled look at the way the late Anthony Bourdain unwittingly went from exposing the dark underbelly of restaurant kitchens into fostering an entire career that became as much about examining the human condition as it was about eating exotic food. Roadrunner isn’t what one would declare to be a definitive examination of Bourdain as it all but ignores his life before reality television came calling. But as a film that digs into the question of “Why would a guy like Anthony Bourdain spend half his life on television?” it’s a fairly thorough, albeit problematic, examination.

And that question does seem to be one worth asking. Bourdain’s nature as an acerbic, brash, occasionally crass, personality seems like the complete opposite of what some would consider to be a foundational source for years worth of television programming that would come to be considered beloved, even inspirational, by countless viewers the world over. This seems like the perfect time to note that I was one such viewer. I’ve watched nearly every single TV episode Bourdain ever filmed (A Cook’s Tour, his first show, is hard to find so I’m more than a bit behind on that one). I’ve read his breakout book, Kitchen Confidential. And I wept on the day the news broke about his death by suicide. Bourdain’s work through No Reservations and Parts Unknown had become beacons of comfort and inspiration for me, especially over the last several years when it began to feel like empathy for anyone beyond our national borders grew more and more scarce. There was nowhere, literally nowhere, in the world where he would go and wouldn't find something and someone worth lifting up and showing the best of. He saw beauty and grace no matter where he traveled. 

It’s clear Neville himself was similarly impacted and thus goes to great lengths in this attempt to unravel the knot that was Bourdain, interviewing everyone from the producers who first put him on television to Bourdain’s second wife to the various chefs, artists and musicians he considered friends or peers. All of them remember the man in a largely similar way: What you saw on-camera was very much who he was, albeit amplified. Yet he also relished his time off-camera both because he was often fairly shy and taciturn, and also because it allowed for a brief respite from the perpetual grind of traveling and filming more nearly 300 days a year. 

What’s somewhat frustrating, however, is that the film doesn’t really reveal much in the way of new or enlightening information about Bourdain, at least if you’re already a fan or follower of his work. Such, I suppose, is one of the challenges of documenting a life already thoroughly documented. There is little to chew on here that one wouldn’t also gather from watching a half dozen or so curated episodes of his shows, or in his writing. But if you, unlike me, aren’t terribly familiar with Bourdain, then Roadrunner will provide a succinct primer. 

Neville’s real sin, however, is in how he handles the topic of Bourdain’s death. His suicide, more specifically, and what may (or may not) have lead to it. 

Roadrunner is not shy about the topic of Bourdain’s death. The film is, arguably, entirely centered around the subject, often in the form of Bourdain’s own words. He had no qualms joking about death, about killing himself. Often it comes across as simply his own morbid sense of humor and the fact that he often enjoyed making others feel uncomfortable. Bourdain also had an addictive personality, kicking a heroin addiction and, as the film and its interviewees suggest, simply substituted drugs for whatever would become his new, immediate obsession. This would range from movies to studying and practicing jiu-jitsu. 

This all comes to a head once Neville begins to touch on the subject of Asia Argento, Bourdain’s girlfriend at the time of his death. Estranged from his wife, Bourdain and Argento dated for about two years. Over that span she became more and more involved in the production and crafting of Parts Unknown, much to the distaste of Bourdain’s longtime production crew. Neither the crew interviewed nor Neville himself ever explicitly blame Argento for driving Bourdain to suicide, but that’s practically a technicality given the presentation. Neville at one point has someone very directly state that Bourdain was solely responsible, but it almost feels as though Neville inserted the statement to cover his own legal hide as much as anything resembling a fair portrait. The insinuation is made all the more frustrating given that, according to his own statement in an interview, Neville didn’t even attempt to interview Argento. 

Thankfully, this material makes up a relatively minor portion of the film. The way it’s handled isn’t enough to make me steer anyone away from it, but it is something viewers should very much be prepared for. 

Ultimately, Roadrunner is worth a watch. It may not present much new, but I must admit it was still a joy for me to be able to watch one of my heroes on the big screen and to hear people who loved him speak so fondly about their time with him. 

[bisexualcrowley]

SFW Headcannons- Lucifer

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

This fucker is TOUCH STARVED, always wanting to be touching you in some way, whether it be full on bear hugs while cuddled up at night or a simple hand on your forearm when you’re sitting in the library

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

Lucifer can the most dramatic, annoying motherfucker ever to grace the earth but he makes it fun. Being friends with Luci means constantly joking around, pulling pranks and really just enjoying yourselves with no limit.

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

When you’re sleeping, Lucifer prefers to lay on his back with your body snuggled up on top of him and your head burrowed against his neck, but just for cuddling? Little spoon. Little spoon all the time, he just lives for the feeling of his back pressed against you with your arms tucked around his waist.

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

Much to your amusement, Lucifer’s an absolute garbage fire when it comes to cooking. The number of times you’ve come back to your motel room after a hunt to find that he’d nearly burnt the building down trying to fix you something to eat is astounding.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

If it was just a fling, Lucifer would probably just straight up end things or if he really didn’t care, ghost the person, but if it was a relationship he really cared about he would sit his s/o down to talk it through, kindly explain to them why things have to end.

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

Once he finds the one, Lucifer absolutely wants to settle down and fully commit to his partner, but isn’t too keen in the idea of marriage for a number of reasons, the most prominent being that he’s practically immortal and the details would just make things complicated

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

Once he really truly trusts you, Lucifer lets his softer side show, both acting far less tough than he is around the Winchesters and treating you delicately, afraid that he might mess something up and drive you away

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

Lucifer puts on his tough guy exterior when he’s around others, but when he’s alone with you all he wants to do is tuck himself up in your arms and hold you

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

Luci’s afraid of it at first, afraid to be rejected and afraid that he’d end up regretting it, but when the time comes when he can’t keep himself from confessing his feelings, you meet him with a kiss and immediately he knows he had nothing to be afraid of

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

Lucifer gets jealous FAST, this man cannot stand to see another guy paying too much attention to you, always showing up and sliding an arm around your waist, or pulling you into a kiss that would be more than inappropriate in public to show everyone you’re his

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

He loves to kiss you everywhere, but the ones that bring him the most joy are the the times he presses his mouth to yours in a soft, loving kiss that ends before it has the chance to grow more passionate. He always loves every way you kiss him, but when you hop up to give him a peck on the tip of his nose in excitement he can feel his heart swell 

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

It’s laughable how clueless he is when it comes to dealing with children. It’s clear that he learned nothing from Nick about how to act around kids, and the few times where he doesn’t avoid them the interaction is painfully awkward, ending with an embarrassed Lucifer and you and the child laughing your asses off.

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

Cuddles, giggles and soft kisses that almost always turn into Lucifer whining and flashing you his puppy-dog eyes when you try to get out of bed, insisting that he’s more important than whatever it is you have to do that day.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

It’s always a surprise with Lucifer, some nights are spent out bowling or causing whatever mischief comes to his mind, some nights the years alone in the cage get to him and turn him into a horny bastard, pretty obvious what you guys do then. Most nights though, and arguably your favorites are the nights spent in domestic bliss, cuddling in bed while watching a movie or watching Lucifer cheat at board games. The little things, that make you smile.

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

Lucifer’s time in the cage messed him up more than he cares to admit, and from that he hesitates to flat out share things about himself, preferring to avoid the topics until whatever it is comes out accidentally or you figure it out from fragments of information.

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

Lucifer has a quick temper, but the rare time that he snaps at you he apologizes right away, never wanting to take his anger out on the one person he cares about.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

He remembers the little things that make you smile more than anything else, your favorite flower, favorite snack, favorite movie, anything he can use as a pleasant surprise for you. 

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

Back when he was still hallucifer, there was a day when Dean had let you drive the Impala. It wasn’t a long drive compared to the usual length for you and the brothers, just a couple hours, but you had been thrilled, immediately plugging your playlist into the car and grinning as your favorite song blasted through the speakers. Lucifer remembers Dean groaning, beginning to protest but being cut off as you cut him off with a mocking laugh of “Driver picks the music, shotgun shuts his cakehole.” Lucifer had cackled at Dean’s look of annoyance, but his laugh died off when you started singing along with the music. You seemed so happy, happier than he had seen you before in the year he had been with Sam, and the beauty of the situation shocked him. Sam of course was baffled at the sudden silence from beside him, having grown used to Lucifer's constant annoyance and burst into laughter at the look of awe on the devils face, but Lucifer didn’t care, he was focused on you. 

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

Lucifer likes to lay his head on your chest and listen to your heartbeat to feel secure. To him, it’s proof that he’s not back in the cage, you’re real, you’re there together and that he’s safe.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

He usually doesn’t need to put much effort in, every little thing he does for you always turns out to be worth so much more than he planned

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

Luci is absolute trash (pun not intended) at picking up after himself, always “forgetting” to move a plate from the table to the sink or leaving piles of clothes on the floor

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

Every vessel he’s using always manages to look more attractive with Lucifer inside but Nick is objectively the most attractive, and Lucifer knows it. He doesn’t put much effort into his appearance on most days, knowing he looks hot without trying, but he does take the time to put together a good look the times where you’re going out, always managing to match his suit to whatever outfit you put on.

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

Before meeting you Lucifer thought he was doing great on his own, but after getting to know you? He can’t imagine what it would be to be alone again, you’re a massive part of him and he never wants to give it up

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

Lucifer likes to drape one of his wings over your shoulders as a show of affection

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

Someone who doesn’t want to joke around with him, or someone who acts too controlling. Far too much like his dad, thank you very much.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)

When Lucifer takes the time to sleep, he sprawls out across the entire bed. When you first join him under the covers he’ll pull you down to snuggle up against his chest and every so often he’ll keep an arm tucked around you, but more often than not his arms and legs end up stretched across the entire expanse of wherever he’s laying

[legacysmpheadcanons]

Legacy SMP Kingdom AU

MAIN CAST PLANS

———

LOGICALGEEKBOY

- - -

Logic is the crowned King of Legacy. He inherited the throne when his father was assassinated by someone, first presumed to be MythicalSausage, later discovered as Evil Xisuma, influenced by the Withering Energy. Logic is not always a good king. He continues his youthful playfulness, and puts himself in life threatening situations. Logic’s accusations of Mythical as his father’s assassin started a civil war which, in addition to nearly tearing the kingdom apart, also allowed the Withers to amass power, as only a King on the throne of Legacy is able to truly detect and stop the Wither’s destruction. Logic casually supports the Church of the Bee, however, he isn’t devoted, to the dismay of Chim.

MYTHICALSAUSAGE

- - -

Lord Mythical is Logic’s righthand man and the current default heir to the throne. He attempted to overthrow Logic during the civil war, but the two later reconciled and agreed to share responsibilities after the discovery of the Withering Energy. Mythical was trained in swordfighting, and can hold his own in battle, however, he prefers the arts of philosophy to war, although he will fight to protect his honor and name. Whenever Logic goes on his adventures, Mythical stays behind to tend to the kingdom. He’s one of the largest proponents of the Bee Church, causing him to clash heads with Lime, who doesn’t believe in the Bees.

SLICEDLIME

- - -

Lime is a god, who, when he discovered the amassing strength of the Withering Energy, gave up some of his memories, and all of his powers to take on the form of an elf child to investigate. He was adopted by a knight in the castle when Logic was a child, despite being unable to speak the common language of the land, only being able to communicate in an archaic dialect spoken by those who worshipped the Old Gods. He was raised to be Logic’s trusted ally and personal bodyguard. He is arguably the best warrior in the kingdom, although he dislikes actual fighting and advocates for peaceful resolutions to conflicts. His one goal is to keep Logic safe. He dislikes Mythical, for kidnapping him during the war as he sometimes has flashbacks to that time. He is one of the few in Legacy that doesn’t worship the Bees, although he was forced into it, instead spending his time cleaning up the garden devoted to the Old Gods. No one notices how one of the stained glass windows in that place looks suspicious similar to him.

CHIMNEYSWIFT

- - -

Chim is the head pastor and leader of the Church of the Bee, and firmly advocates for them. He oversees construction of the Honey Chapels, blessing them in the kingdom. He is supposed to be one of the closest royal advisers, and is jealous that his position is taken by Lime, especially as Lime doesn’t follow Chim’s religion. When MythicalSausage tried to overthrow Logic, Chim supported his revolt, although later claimed it was for the sake of the bees rather than any true support, as the pastor must be neutral in conflicts.

POPTARTKATZE

- - -

Poppy is a magic wielder and hunter. She often sells her wares in the village around the castle, and she and Lime have become close friends, to the point where Lime goes to her to ask her to track down Logic when he disappears during the war. During the war, she did her best to keep the others in the town safe, before Lime asks for her help. Afterwards, Poppy is the first one to stumble into a place of Withering Energy, finding it during a hunting trip, and reporting it back to Lime. She dislikes Mythical for the harm he did to Lime, but also dislikes Logic because she feels he is an incompetent ruler. She slowly grows to like the two more as she meets them when helping them investigate the Withering Energy.

PEARLESCENTMOON

- - -

Lady PearlescentMoon is, as expected, a lady of the castle. She spends much of her time doing art and design, however, she also does archery and swordfighting casually. She supported Mythical during the war, but advocated for Lime when he was captured. Soon after the Energy started appearing, she ended up spending more of her time as an ambassador, and later was also made a lady of, in nearby Hermit Queendom. She likes Chim, but thinks his incessant asking of her to try and spread the Bees to Hermitcraft is foolish, considering most efforts had ended up dying out, especially when the larger threat of the Withering Energy began to present itself.

PYTHON

- - -

Python was summoned into Legacy on accident when Logic and a few others were performing experiments. He has no memory of how he got there. He was let into the castle and worked as a servant, developing a casual friendship with Logic, who he thought literally created him. During the war, Python did his best to keep his head down and not be caught in the crossfire. When Zloy appeared soon after the Withering Energy did, Zloy recognized him as Python of Hermitcraft. Python discovered he was kidnapped by the same Evil Xisuma who tried to kill the king, and struggled to reconcile his newfound identity, before choosing Legacy over the other.

ZLOYXP

- - -

Zloy is a traveler, teleporter, and wandering trickster, who originally ended up in Legacy while on a search for the source of the Nether Corruption threatening his main home of Truly Bedrock. He scammed several people in Legacy, but his charisma and quick thinking made him able to escape from both Poppy and Logic’s hunt. His realization of Python being from Hermit Kingdom led to him being, while not liked, tolerated in the castle. If he would just stop stealing pastries for once.

NASHCRAFTER

- - -

Nash is a fortune teller, who, unlike some, can see small visions of the future. She usually travels with a wandering circus, making money off predicting futures. She accurately deduces that Lime is one of the old gods, not just a worshipper of them, something Lime swears her to secrecy for, when Logic and Lime visit her group. Unfortunately, she is eventually threatened into revealing to the Withers, both Lime’s existence and his location.

NIKOLIAN

- - -

Nikolian is a shapeshifter who lives in the moat of the castle. He has an intuition for magic, but prefers to try and stay out of harms way.

AVOMANCE

- - -

Avomace is a small-time Necromancer, raising and controlling zombies. He clashes with Zloy over this, as Zloy is a free zombie who hates knowing he can be so easily influenced by any powerful necromancer.

ARCHAELUS

- - -

Archaelus is the castle’s cook. He makes a very good mushroom stew, which he is famous for.

JERMSYBOY

- - -

Jermsy’s contribution to the au is still being considered.

THE PLOT

———

This AU adapts events from both S1 and S2 of Legacy, in addition to having its own unique plot points and spins on circumstances.

The basic ‘main’ plot is as follows:

Evil Xisuma is an entity created by those who use the Withering Energy for evil. After being sniffed out by the Hermit Kingdom, he goes to the heart of the Wither’s power, Legacy, to attempt to gain control over the world. Ex assassinates the king of Legacy, Logic’s father, and frames MythicalSausage, driving the plot into motion.

Logic accuses Mythical of murdering the king, something Mythical denies. While Lime attempts to calm the grieving Logic down, Logic declares war on Lord Mythical, and tells Lime to attack him. Lime refuses, to Logic’s anger, but does end up kicking Mythical out of the castle, a slight Mythical becomes angry for.

Under the suggestion of Chim, Mythical amasses a small army to overthrow Logic before his coronation, after Logic suggests that he would have Mythical executed for his crimes against the king.

Lime is approached by Nikolian, the shapeshifter warning that he has a bad feeling about the future. This is proven right when Poppy discovers that a ‘great darkness’ in the forest is amassing power thanks to the growing conflict. Lime warns Logic, but Logic doesn’t listen.

Mythical attacks Logic. Lime fights him off, aftempting to protect Logic, giving the other time to flee the castle. However, it is at the cost that Lime is captured by Mythical. Lime is tied to his bed and left in his room, heavily guarded, an experience that leaves him with lasting trauma.

Logic is found by Poppy, who shows him also the growing withering energy. Logic recognizes it, and recalls an old fable that, without stability, Legacy would fall to an ancient darkness. It is deduced this is that darkness, and Logic realizes that this is more important than the accusations, especially when he notices a small detail of a scrap of cloth, that happened to also be on the scene of the assassination, that definitely didn’t belong to Mythical. He realizes what a fool he was and returns to the castle to face Mythical.

Meanwhile, Lime attempted an escape. He uses a series of secret caverns, the same ones he used to help Logic escape the castle, ones he had found as a child, to avoid detection, despite that most of the guards were on high alert for him. Lime, however, emerged in the garden dedicated to the old gods that he had maintained, and found him and Mythical face to face. Lime is recaptured, but Logic appears and surrenders, and apologizes, to Mythical for the accusation, explaining what he had found. Mythical is disturbed by the threat.

The group, and other legates, go to investigate the energy. They find themselves trapped by Ex and the Withers, who reveal themselves and attempt to kill Logic and Mythical to leave the throne heirless. During the battle, Lime and Chim working together seal the withers away, Lime using Chim’s magic as well as his godly knowledge to protect Legacy…

Mostly. Evil Xisuma escapes, to fight another day.

Mythical and Logic have a jousting tournament, Logic winning, to determine their new ruler. However, Logic decides that the two would work best if they worked together like they did during the battle with the withers, instead of falling apart.

CONCLUSION

———

And this is the basic idea for my Kingdoms AU in a nutshell. There is soooo much I cut to try and keep this a reasonable length, so if any part if confusing or need elaboration just ask! I really have wanted to share this with someone. Heh. Thanks for reading ^-^’. ------------- Well, that was something to read! Amazing au Jag!

[breaddaerb]

[ brimstone headcannons I ]

✎↷: here’s some stuff i wrote for giggles and plot! enjoy!

in the early days of valorant where allies were still coming together and partnerships were still being made, the other three agents of valorant would look after brimstone. not in the way that one would babysit a child, but as a ‘thank you for his work’ and the natural role of leadership that the man took everyday. at the time, bonds in the group weren’t very strong, but brimstone would return to his quarters after a long day to see multiple dishes sitting outside of his door with various notes. a bowl of spaghetti from killjoy, a sandwich from viper, and a salad from omen.

a bright yellow post it note was usually slapped onto the ceramic of killjoy’s, saying something like ‘enjoy this!’ or ‘i finished the reports you gave me, so rest up!’ while the other two were in printer and an origami (??) paper. they had their own notes scribbled down on them with something about diagnostics and work that day, and brimstone would smile each time he read them over.

brimstone ate good every night because of them. (and he kept the notes too. they’re in the second bottom cabinet.)

(alternatively, the other members learned about this tradition as they arrived. brimstone would receive more food, with more notes that talked less about work and more about the shenanigans that they’re up to. it got to the point where there was simply too many dishes, and the man had laughed before sitting them all down to share the meals together. he still kept their notes.)

everyone looks up to brimstone in some shape or form. brimstone had the best in mind for the group’s entirety, whether it came to health or going out on the field, and many of their plans and parties had all passed by his watchful eyes. “hey, brim!” jett had once called out to him, “issit’ okay if i go take this bad boy for a drive??” in her hands was a flame-painted remote controlled car, and behind her the loud chatter of what seemed to be raze and phoenix.

brimstone would’ve said that she didn’t need to ask him for something this mundane, and yet, those bright eyes filled with childish need for acceptance - his own approval made his fight weaken a little more. resigned, he gave her a smug smile, patting her shoulder. “i’ll go with ya’, kid, just don’t run it into my feet or it’ll turn inta’ scrap metal.”

brimstone doesn’t need to say that he’s tired. as he’s grown older, past his mid-life, it’s been harder and harder to hide the crinkles next to his eyes and the tired droop of his body at times. but as young as the other agents are, they’re able to be perceptive enough to where they know when they should back off. it goes without saying that brimstone won’t ask for advice, only gives it, but the man finds himself showered in watchful glances and general acts of reassurance. it’s nice, really, to know that this group, this family he made has his back. or at least when they’re not insisting on piggy back rides.

between sage, skye, and brimstone, brimstone could arguably make the best housewife/houseband. he cleans, he looks after everyone, and he can cook some damn great food. most of the meals he makes are simple, something that will tie all of the agents over but still good enough to where they wouldn’t complain about how good or bad at was.

alas, things weren’t always like this. in killjoy’s span of time with him, the man tried cooking everything he had seen and never learned before the german gingerly put her hands over his and told him that no, please don’t make the gravy into custard, and let me cook. which is how brimstone found his expertise: cutting and preparing ingredients for killjoy to cook with, his only one slight flaw in his housewife/houseband agenda.

brimstone’s wardrobe has the most variety out of all of the agents. not because his fashion tastes are out of this world, but because clothing had always been the go-to gift on holidays and birthdays. from ugly christmas sweaters to shakira-worthy sequin shirts to huge shark onesies, brimstone has it all. and especially socks. his collection of socks rivals that of a department store’s.

and like socks, brimstone also owns a lot of mugs. at this point there are a few duplicates of ‘#1 dad’ or ‘best boss’, so it’s become a challenge between the other agents to find more obnoxious versions of the same mug. which, is how brimstone ends up drinking black coffee out of a pure silver chalice with ‘I LOVE MY DAD’ written in neon blue permanent marker on the front of it. this one wins.

[outoftownagain]

The best restaurants in Santorini, Greece

This, of course, isn't a definite list. We didn't even try a fraction of what the culinary world of Santorini has to offer and I am sure there are plenty of equally fantastic or better places. But by these 5 restaurants stood out for us and came recommended by other travelers and locals.

Hope you're not hungry!

---

1. Μεταξύ Μας / Metaxi Mas 9FQ5+H2 Exo Gonia, Greece www.santorini-metaximas.gr

Metaxi Mas is a must whether you take a taxi, rent a four-wheeler, or simply walk from the charming village of Pyrgos. (We were advised very strongly against doing the latter by a very nice lady at a souvenir store: "It's not possible to walk, it's in the next village! But it is a wonderful restaurant, you must make it there regardless," she said. We did it anyway and it took about half an hour of walking downhill.) And just like pretty much everyone we spoke to about Metaxi Mas promised, it is absolutely amazing. You won't find your regular horiatiki and moussaka here, but by the time you make it here, you've most likely had enough of those and will be excited to take a quick break. You'll also have a change of view, because the cozy terrace is overlooking the airport and the less photographed side of the island, which may be slightly less iconic but gorgeous nonetheless. We started with Smoked Fish in a Chickpea Stew and the moment we tasted the dish, we knew that it would be the best meal on the island. We continued with Shrimp saganaki finished with ouzo, tomato sauce, fennel and feta cheese, which I will remember for a long time. And then, for a finale, a Spicy fried pork with Assyrtiko Santorini wine (which we were about to learn all about at a nearby winery, Santo Wines) with peppers, onion, garlic, Santorini cherry tomatoes, feta cheese and boukovo—red pepper flakes. Were we full? Of course. Did we want more? Absolutely! It was our last day on Santorini, so we knew we wouldn't have time to return to Metaxi Mas, so we asked our lovely waitress if she could suggest just one more, small dish, simply because everything was so delicious that we'd love another bite. She said that her favorite thing on the menu was Oven-baked asparagus with Cretan graviera cheese and estragon, and we thought that a little asparagus appetizer would be a perfect finishing touch to this feast. Little did we know that the "small dish" is in fact a huge plate filled with lots and lots of hot, melty, delicious cheese (with a little bit of asparagus buried deep under). It was way more than we wanted but way too delicious to leave behind and a taxi to take us to the wine tour at Santo Wines was already waiting. We might have burnt our mouths a little but we finished the asparagus and our wonderful waitress brought us a dessert packed to go because she knew we had to go. If you're in Santorini right now and looking for some delicious food, I couldn't be more jealous of you!

---

2. To Psaraki Vlichada Marina, Vlichada 847 00, Greece www.topsaraki.gr

Near the southernmost tip of Santorini, at the end of Perivolos beach you'll find the charming Vlychada port. Arguably the best place to view it from (and definitely the most delicious one) is To Psaraki taverna. You'll have to drive or take a taxi there but the place is worth the trip. The actual restaurant is very nice but you really want to sit at the bright blue terrace across the street, which overlooks the port and the sea. Eating at To Psaraki feels like finding a hidden gem andt also like being on a Greek postcard at the same time.   The food is delicious and it starts from the very beginning—each table receives a bread basket and a portion of Santorini tomato paste with olive oil and oregano. (There is a tomato paste museum down the road, but it was still closed due to Covid when we visited.) We continued the feast with Fresh Greek mussels steamed with wine and spring onions (it's hard to imagine a more perfect dish to go with the view of sea and a distant smell of a seaport) after which a gorgeous Grilled Octopus arrived. Can't say that we were hungry anymore, but our main dish — fresh and homely amberjack was only about to be served. Accompanied by vegetables, tomatoes and a lemon, it was wonderful.

The restaurant overlooks the port and a short walkaway is Vlychada Beach with black sand, a beach bar and some amazing view of the cliffs, which makes it easy to spend a whole day in this small area.

---

3.  Kokkalo 25is Martiou 25, Thira 847 00, Greece kokkalosantorini.com

We arrived in Santorini midday and after the initial shock caused by the overwhelming beauty of the view from the plane, then the taxi and finally from our suite, we were ready to eat. We picked Kokkalo purely because it was the closest recommended restaurant from our suite. It did take some climbing (everything in Santorini involves countless stairs and hills) and then a short walk along a busy, narrow street, but the place was 100% worth it.

We were greeted by a very friendly and quirky lady with a very particular sense of humor and a tray with 2 glasses of strong, local liquor. Day drinking it is! After hearing that we just arrived on the island, she was quick to recommend a local specialty—Santorini tomato fritters. "If you're going to have them, you need to have them here," she said, "we have cooking classes and we teach how to make them here." Tomato fritters are very tasty, but to be completely honest, it is one of those dishes that you try once and don't necessarily need to order again anytime soon.

We also got the Santorini Greek Salad and Chicken Souvlaki, which were both absolutely delicious and anyone could eat them every day for a long time. The presentation of the chicken deserves a special shoutout—it is definitely an attention-grabber when it arrives at the table.

Kokkalo is totally a great spot—it may not overlook the volcano, but staring into the flat side of Santorini with Anafi island in the distance is a pure pleasure! Mix that with great food, chilled wine and lovely service and you have a fantastic experience!

---

4. Roka Mpotsari 6, Oía 847 02, Greece www.roka.gr

I'm not gonna lie, Roka was a bit of an accident (a great one though!) We hiked from Fira to Oia and we completely underestimated the time it would take us to complete the hike considering all the stops for wine, snacks, photos and views. They say that the hike takes from 3 to 6 hours and it did take us 6 hours (we're fast hikers but we stopped A LOT along the way to enjoy the views and wine) so when we finally got to Oia, we needed to eat before the sunset and most places were either booked or still closed because of Covid. We basically ran to check out Roka and it is semi-hidden in a maze of small, charming alleyways so we got a little lost trying to find it. We were greeted by a man who looked like he could be in a movie about a mafia-ran restaurant: white shirt and a tie, a sceptical gaze, a cigarette hanging from the corner of his mouth, and a brutal silence. He turned out to be our waiter and luckily he turned out to be very friendly, much contrary to our first impression of him.

We were seated at the small back patio lit by the setting sun and overlooking the sea and some less touristy parts of town and the island. The food was absolutely delicious yet presented in a slightly pretentious but cheesy way. It is not taverna food and obviously the chef is aspiring to a higher level of a dining experience. To start we were served rusk with olives and delicious tomato paste, which we learned was typical of Santorini, famous for its cherry tomatoes. Then we continued with ‘Imam Bayaldi’ with eggplant, shrimps, ’Oyzo’ glaze and chilli garlic mayo and Mushrooms Ragout on a sourdough bruschetta with caramelized onions, cream and gruyere sauce. Those two appetizers were quite Huge And Totally Satisfied Our Post-Hike Hunger, But We Had Two More Dishes Coming - Main Courses This Time.

Skioufikta - Traditional Greek Handmade Pasta with Caramelized Onion, Eggplant, Zucchini, Tomato and ’Xinoturi’ From Ios, which was light, delicate and delicious. The shape of pasta is a bit like cavatelli and is a perfect vessel for the summer flavors of this dish. Fresh Dorado Fillet came with fantastic Parsnip Puree, Braised Leek that melts in your mouth with Hazelnuts and was topped with long, thin crisps that gave it an additional texture. Satisfied and excited, we ran to the nearby Castle of Agios Nikolaos for a spectacular and unforgettable sunset.

---

5. Naoussa Fira Santorini Next to the Central Orthodox Cathedral of Fira Town Mitropoleos Fira Town, Thira 847 00, Greece naoussasantorini.restaurant

When we arrived at this gigantic taverna, it was empty, with the only two guests eating at a table near the windows. We decided to sit at the other table with a view—right next to the couple finishing their dinner. It turned out to be a quite an unfortunate choice because those guests were an extreme example of a married couple who goes out to talk to other people in bars and restaurants. We spent the entire dinner listening about the wealth, success and amazing life of our co-diners, all the houses, apartments, businesses and countless trips all over the world were described in detail whether we wanted it or not. We also learned the history of their relationship including tidbits like: "Would you believe that after not seeing me for 2 weeks my husband chose to take me out to eat sushi instead of taking me to the bedroom straight from the airport?"

But back to the restaurant, the food was delicious and the sunset view (when we managed to look away from our interlocutors) quite terrific. We started with Dolmades, which are vine leaves stuffed with lemony rice and happen to be one of my favorite small dishes. The leaves are the best when they're delicate and not veiny, the rice needs to be moist and the entire thing is best served room temperature or slightly warm. So good! We also had a tuna salad with hard boiled eggs, which looked a bit like mess but was packed with unexpected flavor. We finished with a whole fish, which was absolutely perfect.

We did drink a lot of wine and we took our time eating, listening to the forced stories and admiring the sunset. At some point the initially empty dining room filled up completely and then it emptied again. It felt like we experienced the whole circle of sunset dining crowd.

[dolls-self-ships]

More HCs for my Great Mouse Detective s/i (fear. Briar, @omgselinabeckendorf s s/i)

* Both Basil and Briar are fluent in several languages, Briar knowing a few more than Basil courtesy of her studies abroad, both including but not limited to French, Latin, German, Swedish, and Romanian.

* Neither Basil nor Briar can cook nor should they be allowed to

* Basil has several of the same housecoat simply because it’s his favourite and because he likes to still be able to wash them and the laundry will sit there forever until Ms Judson gets to it ssghjjhkjjhf

* Basil mutters to himself often, especially when working (technically this is canon but just imagine him doing that regularly from day to day it’s cute sdfghkkjgjkhds anyway-)

* Basil is quite introverted and can’t stand unexpected company. Not customers, that’s a completely different thing. But if let’s say Dawson’s niece or Clara’s mother were to visit unexpectedly, he would keep his composure and gentlemanly facade on as thick as possible but inside he’s just reeling and praying that they leave soon

* And if they announce that they’re spending the weekend, or god forbid the week, oh boy

* We all know Basil has an extended vocabulary, but Briar is constantly one upping him with bigger words she picked up from her high class friends at school and it drives Basil insane. Being intellectual is supposed to be HIS thing. Siblings are gonna sibling though

* Clara adores theatre and goes whenever she can afford it, Basil is no stranger to appreciating the fine arts himself so he doesn’t mind at all accompanying her so that he can spot her a ticket (completely his treat, he had to reassure her that this was not coming out of her pay check. Basil is s i m p i n g)

* it’s kinda like a date but shhhhhhh they don’t need to know that

* The whole time they’re like “oh my god is this a date???????? what is happening????????? we almost touched hands what did that MEAN? oh god they’re looking at me of fuck-“

* they’re so fucking stupid I can’t

* And neither can Briar

* Circling back to Clara’s mother, she is the classic Overbearing Old Values Mother Pesters Only Daughter About Settling Down cliche. Though she only means well and is nothing but loving towards Clara, she often pushes the whole “I will make you a good wife if it’s the last thing I do” agenda. Much to Claras embarrassment ESPECIALLY when it’s in front of Basil

* Her mother has made it quite clear that she thinks she outa try and get hitched to the detective. I mean, he’s well-off, intelligent, handsome, and can obviously provide because for goodness sake Clara you’re LIVING with him. A young lady shouldn’t let such an opportunity go to waste.

* Of course Basil notices this but do you think he’s gonna say anything???? No he thinks this is hilarious (he may have to swoop in and save Clara for her own sake from time to time, even though the flustered state she goes into it adorable)

* Clara explains that their relationship is strictly business (pft yeah keep telling yourself that) and that even if she did like him (not like she does or anything nope mhm) he’s her boss so that would be weird

* The first time that Basil and Clara met, Basil instantly deducted who she was and whereabouts she was coming from that evening, much to Clara’s amazement, she instantly became a little smitten with him right then and there.

* Basil was quite taken with her as well but had no clue (go figure) until it was weeks after he had hired her, anytime they accidentally touched hands, crossed paths in the halls, or stared a moment too long into each other’s eyes, led Basil more and more to the realization that he was perhaps developing a small crush on her

* But it’s just a teeny tiny crush, right? Surely it won’t evolve into anything more, he’s her boss for goodness sake! Such a thing wouldn’t work.

* Oooohohohohohohohhoho buddy you got a big storm coming

* Ms Judson gives like. The Best life advice. She’s the mom/grandma friend that knows how life works bc she’s been through it and is honestly so tired. Just ready to bake all day, clean, and vibe the rest of the time.

* She’s the first to notice how Basil and Clara feel about each other (arguably Briar probably knew before hand but didn’t mention it), however it had to be pointed out to Dawson, the second it was he immediately understood, seeing what was up

* Like ofc he noticed that Basil had been acting differently since Clara arrived but he didn’t want to seem rude by making any assumptions so it often slipped his mind when he decided not to say anything

[365days365movies]

January 22, 2021: Drive (2011)

I’m late!

Both to posting this review, and to the party. In terms of posting this review, it’s still today! So that’s good; haven’t missed a day yet! As for being late to the party, well...let’s talk about cars in movies.

Well, OK, let’s talk about transportation in movies. One of the earliest known films shown publicly was 1896’s L’arrivee d’un train en gare be La Ciotat, a film by the Lumiere Brothers with a legendary (possibly mythical) reputation. The 50-second movie features a train pulling into a station, directly towards the screen. Legend says that the moviegoers jumped out of their seats, out of the way of the oncoming train, due to their unfamiliarity with the new technology of film. Is this true? Eh. Maybe, maybe not; sorry, Hugo.

But transportation and film are closely related, is my point. 1903’s The Great Train Robbery, 1926’s The General, 1955’s Rebel Without a Cause, 1964’s Goldfinger, up until 1968’s Bullitt, which gave us this.

The classic car chase showcased in Bullitt began a new feature of the action genre: the car chase. And, no, it’s obviously not the first car chase seen in a film shot, by a country MILE. But it is arguably the first of its type, with bold maneuvers memorably showcased throughout. After this, the car chase film would eventually become more predominant. These are films in which the action takes place predominantly through car stunts and competitive driving. And I’m looking at three this month: one that’s critically acclaimed, one that’s a franchise-launcher, and one that’s...complicated. BUT FIRST

I vividly remember when this movie came out. This movie made a huge splash, which is why I say that I’m late to the party on this one. It really was the John Wick of its day, although that would happen 3 years later. So, rather than navel-gaze, it’s about time I saw this movie! SPOILERS AHEAD!!!

Recap

The Driver (Ryan Gosling) is taking up a job. He picks up a pair of bank robbers, while listening intently to the police scanners and keeping track of his police pursuers. After some masterful driving, he escapes into a crowd of sports fans in a crowded stadium garage, leaving the car and the men to fend for themselves. Roll opening credits!

After work, the Driver returns home...then goes right to work, as a film stunt driver working for Shannon (Bryan Cranston), his manager, and owner of an auto shop. He also gets close to his new neighbor, Irene (Carey Mulligan) and her son, Benicio. He helps them with groceries, then heads to work, this time at Shannon’s garage.

Meanwhile, Shannon’s meeting with a local mobster, Bernie Rose (Albert Brooks), asking him for $430,000. His partner, Nino (Ron Perlman), comes in, fully packing an attitude and bad prior relationship with Shannon.

We next see the Driver driving a race car, presumably another of his many driving-themed jobs. A deal for $300,000 is made between Shannon and Rose for an unspecified job. Afterwards, the Driver is working as a mechanic at Shannon’s shop, where worlds collide as Irene and her son go there to get her car fixed. Afterwards, they end up going out together on a fun day out, strengthening their bond. Another date is made for the weekend.

Rose and Nino go to the garage, where we find out that the job is for a race, with the Driver...driving. We also find out about Rose, Nino, and Shannon’s prior relationships; Rose was once a film producer, and Shannon provided the cars for the stunts, overcharging him. Did the same to Nino, a gangster. That is why Shannon now walks with a prominent limp. Because he’s never been very lucky, Shannon has a lot riding on this upcoming race.

The Driver and Irene, who’ve been getting much closer, go on a date that evening. However, this is short-lived, as her husband is returning from jail in a week. It puts the rest of the evening in a somber tone, and we cut to a week later. Irene’s husband, Standard Gabriel (Oscar Isaac) has returned home to a party, while a solitary Driver is repairing a car part in his apartment, alone. He leaves, and sees Irene outside, clearly unhappy at current events. This is followed by a tense interaction between Standard and the Driver.

This leads to two things. First, the Driver gets a drink at a bar, to get over the lost relationship. He meets a guy there who offers him a job, and bitterly turns him down. When he returns to the apartments, he sees the second result: Standard’s been beaten to a bloody pulp by someone. Alive, but clearly hurting, Benicio is with him. The Driver helps Benicio first, then eventually helps out Standard as well.

Not that Standard’s particularly appreciate of this, mind you. Turns out that Standard owes protection money to a group of gangsters, and has been “asked” to rob a local pawn shop. They’ve also threatened Irene and Benicio, which naturally is of concern to the Driver. Benicio is scared, having witnessed this, and was also given a bullet by one of the men, as a warning to Standard.

The Driver goes to see Irene at her job, where he intonates what’s happened to Standard, and shows concern. However, he’s lied to Irene about the cause for the assault, leaving her in the dark about the danger that they’re in. Still, she invites Driver to dinner, to which he accepts. It’s awkward, unsurprisingly.

Back to the Driver alone, who apparently steals a car? Not sure, but that’s the implication. For Benicio and Irene, the Driver offers to help Standard, and makes a deal with Cook (James Biberi), the gangster to whom he owes money. Together with his partner, Blanche (Christina Hendricks), the job commences.

They get to the shop, and Blanche and Standard go in...but only Blanche leaves. As Standard comes out, he gets shot multiple times, killing him. The Driver, of course, takes off like a shot, but is pursued by another car in a high speed chase. He turns around and drives BACKWARDS down a stretch of highway, eventually throwing the pursuer off the road.

With Blanche, he hides out in a motel, where the initial goal of $40,000 is revealed to be far, FAR exceeded. It’s also revealed that the pawnshop owner claims that Standard acted alone, and that no money was stolen. Which is the first major indicator that something is very, VERY wrong here. And it seems like Blanche is a part of a wider conspiracy here. And the Driver is NOT happy about it.

Cook indeed set them up, planning to rip off the Driver and Standard. Blanche knew about the second car, but was unaware of the plan to kill Standard, or the large amount of money to be retrieved. So she says, anyway. I personally find that pretty hard to believe. And so does the Driver, as someone attempts to enter the motel. And, uh…

HOOOOOOO THAT IS A GRAPHIC HEADSHOT! Yeah, Blanche is FUCKED, as two armed men forcefully enter the motel room, and BOTH get killed by the Driver. What in the hell has he gotten himself into?

Somewhat injured, the Driver takes the cash and goes to Shannon’s to get sewn up. Shannon definitely seems enamored with the prospect of so much cash in the wind, but still promises that he’ll try to find out more about Cook. But the Driver doesn’t appear too willing to wait for that, as he finds the gangster behind the scenes of a strip club, and just DESTROYS his hand with a HAMMER.

Threatening to pound Benicio’s bullet into his head with the hammer, he asks whose money that ACTUALLY was, as it couldn’t have been the pawn shop’s. Turns out that, YUP, it’s NINO’S MONEY! Shit. He has someone call Nino, as he holds Cook underfoot. On the phone, he offers back the money, free of charge. Nino, unaware that this is the Driver about to race for Rose, tells his men to find out who he is.

The Driver returns home, where he tells Irene exactly what was going on with Standard. He reveals the debt, as well as his offer to help, and offers the money to her and Benicio. She’s understandably not happy. During this conversation, one of Nino’s men shows up in the elevator, as Irene and the Driver are going into it. Realizing what’s about to happen, the Driver pushes Irene aside and gives her a VERY passionately framed kiss. But what happens next...is less romantic.

The Driver has just brutally murdered this man, and I MEAN brutally. The elevator doors close between a horrified Irene and a seemingly ashamed Driver, possibly symbolizing their likely-permanent separation. But there’s a problem: how did Nino’s guy know where the Driver was?

Shannon. Stupid, STUPID Shannon told Rose, who told Nino, who told his men, who went to the apartment to kill the Driver, and probably Irene and Benicio. He confirms this to the Driver, who is RIGHTFULLY PISSED OFF. Shannon’s apologetic, having not actually realized that Nino was involved.

Nino and his men are going to be looking for the Driver now, as well as for Shannon. He tells Shannon to get out of town, and never come back. But now, the Driver’s killed one of Nino’s men as a result. But it’s even worse than that.

Turns out that the robbery was planned by Nino, and the money belonged to an East Coast mobster storing $1,000,000 in the pawnshop, secretly. So now, THEY’LL come looking for the money as well. Because of this, the only known ties to the robbery, the Driver and Shannon, have to be eliminated. Well, Cook’s also a tie, to be fair. Which is why Rose kills him IMMEDIATELY, and brutally.

The Driver, fresh out of the elevator, goes to his stuntman trailer to get a disguise. Shannon, on the other hand, is trying to escape Rose and Nino’s wrath. But unfortunately, Rose gets to him first. He tries to convince Shannon to tell him the location of the Driver, to no avail. Unfortunately, that means that Shannon’s of no use, as Rose kills him, efficiently and quickly.

The Driver finds his body, and now he has another death to avenge. He takes the money, and goes to Nino’s place, where he uses the stuntman’s disguise, and follows Nino out. And now...it’s revenge time. 

OHHHHHHH FUCK! He runs off the road, leaves them for a minute, then purposefully T-bones them! The car’s launched onto a beach, where Nino stumbles away, having survived. But not for long, as the Driver goes to kill him in the water. Afterwards, he calls Rose, and invokes the story about...the Scorpion and the Frog.

...Oh. OHHHH! HOLY SHIT, I GET IT!!!!

That’s why he wears the jacket! He’s a Scorpion! All of this killing, despite his better interest at this point, is in his nature! HA! That’s awesome! If you aren’t aware of the fable of the Scorpion and the Frog, it goes a little something...like this:

A Scorpion needs to get across a river, so he goes to a Frog. Frog’s like, “FUCK NO I look like I wanna die today? You’ll sting me as we’re going across” And the Scorpion says, “Yeah, sure, I sting you and I drown myself in the process, real smart idea on my part. C’mon, I’m not gonna sting you, just give me a ride, yeah?” Frog’s like, “OK, bet. I’ll take you across.” So Scorpion hops on Frog’s back, and they go across the river, and RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE, Scorpion stings Frog. “WHAT THE FUCK DID I SAY, GODDAMMIT,” says Frog, and Scorpion replies, “Sorry, man...it’s in my nature.” And then they both drown.

So, killing is actually the Driver’s nature. He’s always been the Scorpion, trying to hide from those abilities and tendencies. But once a threat comes along, the claws and telson come out, and it’s just STAB STAB CLAW CLAW STOMP STOMP SHOOT SHOOT from there. Cool!

Anyway, Rose agrees that things have gone too far, but also acknowledges that Irene is still aware of this situation, meaning she’s still at risk.  Subtly threatening her, Rose arranges a meeting place for the Driver to bring his sonMONEY! His sonny. I’ve been holding Finding Nemo jokes in this whole time, seriously. It’s Albert Brooks, he’s Marlin, the hell else am I gonna do?

They meet at a Chinese restaurant mentioned briefly early in the film. Rose offers the following deal: he takes the money, and Irene and Benicio are safe. The Driver, probably not, but at least she’d be safe. And he agrees...only her Rose to stab him as he gives him the money. The Driver stabs him back, killing him immediately. 

Not that the Driver’s doing much better. Stabbed in the stomach, he sits in the seat of the car, his seat. Still. He leaves the money in the parking lot...and he drives away. Irene knocks on his door, but there’s no answer. And the Driver...drives.

And that’s Drive. WOW. A lot to unpack with this one, but see you in the Epilogue for that!

[thejakeformerlyknownasprince]

Um, I saw an argument about this and.... is Animorphs a kids or young adult series? It's really got me confused

Animorphs is a children’s book series.  It’s written for children, marketed to children, adopts a childist perspective, and primarily discusses the concerns of children.  It is not a young adult series, nor is it even a marginal case like Percy Jackson or Harry Potter.

Why is my stance on this so firm?

First of all, Young Adult as a marketing category (for fiction aimed at teens) didn’t even exist in the mid-1990s when Animorphs first came out.  It wasn’t developed until the mid-2000s with works such as Twilight, Hunger Games, and Mortal Instruments.  But even if we’re willing to go back and classify pre-YA works as being precursors (e.g. Eragon, Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants), then Animorphs still doesn’t fit the bill, because Animorphs too clearly is about childhood rather than adolescence.

The protagonists of Animorphs have non-alien goals that revolve around getting their homework done, living up to their families’ expectations, avoiding bullies, and figuring out their own genders and orientations.  They’re scared of being separated from their parents (#7), of losing their sense of fun (#19), and of never being able to have lives outside of the war (MM1).  These aren’t the hopes and fears of mid-adolescence; they’re the hopes and fears of late childhood.  They’re not motivated by adolescent concerns like sex, rebellion, drugs like alcohol, independence from authority, or personal privacy.  They don’t have adolescent worries about crossing the thresholds of adulthood, maintaining their ability to travel, choosing colleges or career paths, or being respected as independent adults.  They’re child characters.

The Animorphs are children, and thus also don’t have the rights and freedoms of adolescents.  They don’t drive, they don’t go on unsupervised dates, they don’t hold jobs, they have chores but don’t maintain households, they don’t plan their own futures more than a few weeks in advance, and they don’t have money beyond a few dollars here and there.  Marco is a partial exception to all of those, but he’s the first one to admit that he lacks the skills to shop for food more filling than Peanut M&Ms (#5), to drive more than a mile without crashing (#28), or to manage money long-term (#14).  Marco is cooking and shopping for his household out of necessity, and he’s doing it as an untrained child would rather than as an emerging adult would.  Because he, like all the other Animorphs, has the knowledge and abilities of a child rather than a young adult.

The Animorphs come off like kids, with kids’ level of experience.  None of them have heard of the Battle of Agincourt or the Battle of Trafalgar (MM3), all of them are more inclined to go “eew” than “ooh” on the rare occasions when talk turns to sex (#13, #43), and most of them are pretty terrible at electronics operations (#16, #20).  Most of their battle strategies come from cartoons and video games, not formal martial theory.  Nevertheless, the kids are treated as complex and valid individuals capable of both great good and great evil.  That’s my oversimplified understanding of the childist perspective: that it focuses on the ways that society restricts and dismisses children, and takes the radical stance that children can be fully human members of society while still being fundamentally children at heart, without having them be mini-adults in all but name.  Animorphs has a firmly childist perspective toward its own protagonists, and emphasizes that with the minor characters.

Because most adults treat the Animorphs like kids, refusing to respect their superior experience even when confronted with overwhelming evidence that these kids know what they’re doing.  The Animorphs, by contrast, never stop respecting adults and adult authority.  Most notably, the protagonists never ever stop referring to adults as “Mr. Tidwell,” “General Doubedday, sir,” “Aunt Naomi,” etc., even on occasions when they’re telling those adults what to do.  The kids operate outside traditional power structures sometimes, but still view themselves as being subject to those power structures.

As a quick point of contrast, think about an in-between series like Harry Potter.  The protagonists don’t just date but make out and have intense sexuality crises.  They travel long distances without adults and are trusted to provide for themselves, especially in Deathly Hallows.  They pivot away from “Professor Lupin” toward “Remus” in later books, and they tell off headmasters and Ministers for Magic alike.  They make career choices, and lead social justice movements.  They’re arguably more child than young adult when the series starts, but they’re also pretty clearly more young adult than child when the series ends.

One last point of order:

[Image description: the spine and part of both covers of Animorphs #9.  The Scholastic logo, a white book on a red background, is visible on the spine and front cover.  The name “Scholastic” is visible on the front and back covers.]

The Scholastic name or logo appears — by my count — no less than eight times on a standard Animorphs book, including twice on the spine alone.  That’s not just a marketing tactic.  It’s a signal to librarians, teachers, and other children’s book curators that these books being listed under the “ages 8 to 12″ label isn’t arbitrary or accidental.  These books have been evaluated by experts in the field, and deemed not only appropriate but engaging and also educational for children in that age bracket.  These books use simple language, except when they occasionally use and then immediately define more complex terms like “thermal” or “singularity.”  Their educational content focuses primarily on animal facts, with a moderate dash of history and good ol’ fashioned ethics, and that content is present in every book.  A young adult series would be under no obligation to explain how gravity affects whales’ organ structure in the middle of an adventure (#27).  I’m no expert, but I wholeheartedly agree: these books are appropriate, enjoyable, educational, and meaningful for kids to read.

These books have a lot of extreme content, which is probably the source of the confusion about the target audience.  Because we live in a culture that simultaneously holds up the myth of children as innocent beings unaffected by violence, and devalues children’s culture through suggesting that any serious or impactful work MUST be meant for adults like us.  But Animorphs is so good because it’s a series for kids, never in spite of that.