#arwen yells

[yumpher]

behold, the result of a very long art block that is still in effect! My hands aren’t doing what I’ve taught them to do with a pencil so I’m a bit on a break while I’m fixing up (or at least trying to) the art block

[thescrolls-haveforetold]

UGHHH i updated my pinned post but i Super think i need to contain oc stuff to a google doc or some shit..

[kindlythevoid]

One of the best parts of Fellowship of the Ring is finding out about Aragorn and Bilbo’s friendship. Like I’ve seen people talk about how they collaborated on the song together, but I have yet to see people talk about this:

“[Bilbo] turned to Strider. ‘Where have you been, my friend? Why weren’t you at the feast? The Lady Arwen was there.’”

Bilbo Baggins, The Fellowship of the Ring pg. 261

Like. Bilbo was definitely one of Aragorn/Arwen’s chief shippers and no one can change my mind about that.

[kirbsto]

Obligatory thruple post

[grouper]

don't cry on the public bus challenge (IMPOSSIBLE)

[nezu-tan]

Some fun I did with a friend

@nurizyume

[noodlebutts]

Why are my cats like this???? How did these jerkheads both somehow evaporate their incisors????

[b1gerror]

splitting up had been the right thing to do,    avoid sending off the kids (who were now as 𝚘𝚕𝚍 𝚊𝚜 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚠𝚎𝚛𝚎 when you first met) into the jaws of the unknown alone.   small groups,   it was easier to stick together then,   not lose anyone in the heat of the moment.     some groups hadn’t returned ʸᴱᵀ,   but radioed that all was fine.     it was all over, right?  𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑤𝑜𝑛,   hawkins would return to manicured lawns and the suburban dreamland that it was in your hated youth.    the adrenaline was wearing off,  and you were all ᵀᴼᴼ ᴬᵂᴬᴿᴱ of an ache in your side.     𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚠𝚎𝚛𝚎𝚗’𝚝 𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚕𝚕𝚢 𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚗𝚒𝚗𝚐,    mind clouded over with jonathan’s words muffled.      “   — -   ..    i’m fine,   it’s just -          ”        knees suddenly give out beneath you,   falling into his chest before being lowered to the ground.

⠀⠀   @filmdeve10ped​​​​​  asked  — -  ⠀       “   you’re shivering… hey. hey, listen to me, okay? everything’s gonna be alright, i promise. here… take my jacket. don’t worry, i’m warm-blooded.    ”       —    ⠀⠀

shivering despite the 𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑛 𝑙𝑎𝑦𝑒𝑟 𝑜𝑓 𝑠𝑤𝑒𝑎𝑡 that had formed on your skin,    brow furrowed as hand ᶠᴼᵁᴺᴰ the source,     crimson near invisible against the black cotton of your shirt,    but all too obvious on the palm of your hand,    lifting it to show to him.        “   uhm  ..      i ,    𝚒 𝚍𝚘𝚗’𝚝 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚔 𝚒𝚝’𝚜 𝚖𝚒𝚗𝚎,    i mean i would have felt it and i was so careful and — -      𝑜ℎ 𝑚𝑦 𝑔𝑜𝑑,    you need to make sure the kids are alright,   it might be theirs and-     ”       cut short by 𝚊 𝚜𝚝𝚛𝚒𝚔𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚙𝚊𝚒𝚗 in your side,   confirming that it was in fact yours,    breathing becoming heavier and heavier as panic began to set in.      mind raced,    all possible things it 𝑐𝑜𝑢𝑙𝑑 be—     not bitten,   that ruled out rabies.    sepsis?    possible,    but not something you wanted to think about.      you didn’t want to draw attention from the others,    heartfelt reunions,   a buzz behind you from finally getting to close this chapter of their lives.       𝚔𝚗𝚞𝚌𝚔𝚕𝚎𝚜 𝚠𝚑𝚒𝚝𝚎 as you grip onto his shirt,     pained breaths,        “    please,    don’t call them over.      it’s fine,    𝚠𝚎’𝚛𝚎 𝚐𝚘𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚝𝚘 𝚋𝚎 𝚏𝚒𝚗𝚎.     ”       as if you were convincing yourself more ᵀᴴᴬᴺ ᴴᴵᴹ,     the reality of your situation setting in.      “   there’s bandages..    in my bag.    ”

was this it?     all those years ᶠᴵᴳᴴᵀᴵᴺᴳ to escape from the hawkins monster had come to an end,    and not in the way you thought.     YOU CAME BACK,   YOU SWORE YOU NEVER WOULD.        diaries filled with plans of leaving hawkins in the rearview mirror,     but can you ever outrun fate?    hawkins had its claws in you from the very beginning,     forcing you further and further into its clutches.    the last time you had been here,    jonathan was still 𝑎 𝑦𝑒𝑎𝑟 𝑎𝑤𝑎𝑦,    tucked inside memories yet to be made,    fading in old.    but the people of hawkins,   as clueless as they were,    deserved to be saved,   did they not?     the caul-de-sacs with the pretty houses and 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚙𝚎𝚛𝚏𝚎𝚌𝚝 𝚏𝚊𝚖𝚒𝚕𝚒𝚎𝚜 in them,   the drives by the quarry and the woods on your way home,    the familiar four walls that you grew up in.     to leave hawkins forever would have meant leaving it ᴬᴸᴸ behind,   and you never had been good with goodbyes.      now,   it just seemed cruel,    𝑡𝑜 𝑏𝑒 𝑏𝑙𝑒𝑒𝑑𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑜𝑢𝑡 𝑜𝑛 𝑓𝑎𝑚𝑖𝑙𝑖𝑎𝑟 𝑠𝑡𝑟𝑒𝑒𝑡𝑠,    in the arms of one of your only friends.    it’s almost poetic,     you are reminded of emily,    of 𝑜𝑢𝑟 𝑡𝑜𝑤𝑛 during your sophomore year,    from your 𝚎𝚡𝚒𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚒𝚊𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝 𝚙𝚑𝚊𝚜𝚎 that you remind yourself you should tell jonathan about—      how unless you’re really paying attention,   you could miss what truly matters.           ribcage constricts,     the new pressure of bandages bringing more awareness to the pain,    teeth grit.      it’s all going to be okay,    you repeat it over and over inside your mind until you think you’ve convinced yourself of it,    eyelids heavy through the pain.         “    listen,    if i don’t make it—        tell steve i’m sorry,    for everything,   for bringing him into my life,   𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚖𝚊𝚔𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚑𝚒𝚖 𝚜𝚝𝚊𝚢—            and you,   i mean..    i was the one that wanted to come back,   and now you might need to pay the rent yourself and that was a ᴿᴱᴬᴸᴸʸ shitty thing for me to do.      ”        you laugh,    it’s all you can do to stop sleep overcoming you.        hand reached up to rest on the side of his face,     offering a smile through glossy eyes.          “    promise me you won’t watch any good films until i’m alright?    ”

[mag200]

i know it was a very 2000s feminism girlboss movie addition but you have to love arwen drawing her sword at the river and telling the witch king to come over and claim frodo if he wants him so bad. truly the high fantasy equivalent of yelling “come say that on my side of the street motherfucker”. the spirit of luthien tinuviel was alive within her in that moment.

[gallusrostromegalus]

Herschel Has Discovered Tool Use. Again.

In january of 2021, deep in the throes of pandemic psychosis, we acquired a Corgi Puppy.

I would like to go on the record that we did not get a Corgi because they're cute. We got a Corgi because they're criminally brilliant and enthusiastic working dogs that were bred to bully cattle, which is the exact temperment a dog living in a house with three ADHD adults should have. Herschel does commit a lot of crime, but he also does his appinted service-dog job of "make everyone wake up, eat meals and go to bed at a reasonable and consistent time" extremely well, as well as his bonus jobs of "Keep the squirrels the hell out of the garden" and "Yell every time the cat does something". I didn't actually ask him to do that last job but it has helped in the "teach the cat to stay the hell off the stove" area.

But even with having a whole pack of humans another dog, and a cat to manage, this pales in comparison to his genetic capacity to manage several hundred sheep or cattle across the fields of Wales, and thus, Herschel has decided on further intellectual pursuits to occupy himself, namely, speedrunning the early phases of human tool use and terraforming.

I realized he has the brains of an entire hunter-gatherer tribe shortly after he got fixed, and within 24 hours and still dpey from anesthesia, he'd figured out that his plastic cone could be used to monopolize the water bowl and his favorite chew toys, and within a week, had learned how to carry three toys at once while leaving his mouth open by tucking the toys behind his enormous ears and under his chin. He also figured out that he could wiggle the cone to rest against his shoulders, and started using it as a shovel by literally running the bottom edge into the ground. But that wasn't making holes effeicently enough, apparently, and I ended up watching him figure out how to rotate the cone around so the two pieces of overlapping plastic were under his chin, then use his chin and the stairs to the deck to pinch both ends into a much more efficient V-Shape that let him gouge huge strips of dirt up in seconds. The anthropologists and animal behaviorists in the audience may recognize this as Tool Creation, a behavior normally only seen in higher primates, crows, and some parrots. Once a hole of suitable length, depth and temperature had been achieved, he very carefully rolled the cone around so the digging side was over his head and the smooth side under his chin, and splooted into his hole to cool his little tummy and stitches off. It was at that point that I realized that I was going to have to teach him how to garden, or he was going to teach himself.

He no longer has the cone (He was beginning to experiment with it as a battering ram), but his morning ritual is now "Wake everyone up at 8AM by screaming, locate everyone in house and jam my nose up theirs to make sure they're alive, go outside and scream at the squirrels. Now that Yard is Secure, go get Fun Parent who has hopefully taken their meds by now, and supervise them while they rifle through the plants (this is apparently KEY to their mental health), eating any pest animals Fun Parent points out, chase squirrel AGAIN, go inside and get Breakfast cookie." and BY GOD if we deviate from it there will be much screaming and destruction. If I am not home, it has been reported that he walks round the garden beds and sniffs the plants in the order I usually check them in before he will agree to come in. He doesn't quite know what the deal with the melons is, just that they need to be checked.

But we're out of the labor-intensive parts of gardening and now into Harvesting Season, and this is a bit boring except when I give him snap peas right off the vine, and he has decided to work on the complex physics problem that is Doorknobs.

And last week, he had a breakthrough.

Sometime in 2020, my mom sort-of taught her horrible crime herding dog Arwen how to open the back door so she could let herself out as she pleased during the day and stop interrupting Mom's Zoom calls. Arwen is a Kelpie, which means she's about 60lbs with full-length legs and horrible monkey paws that are one joint away from being hands, so when Arwen wants to open the back door, she sits up, leans on the door for purchase/to push it, and uses her terrible crime hands to *push* on the knob until it turns. She can pull the knob open by pawing and catching it on her toes, but she's 11-13 years old now and has mild arthritis, so she prefers to catch it on her central pad instead. She taught Charlie, the other equally brilliant but less criminally inclined dog, to do this but he doesn't like to go outside alone, so he rarely does this.

Herschel, ever the observant student, immediately tried copying them, but even though he is actually tall enough to reach the knob, his toes are just too stubby to get a decent grip on the knob, pushing or pulling, and the first few times, gave up and sat down to scream until one of the fullsize dogs or humans came to open the door for him.

Last week, we were up at my parent's again, and I watched him hunt around the living room until he found his slightly-sticky orange rubber ball (It's clean, it's just a kind of rubber that's always a bit tacky), carry it across the house, stand up on his hind legs at the back door, put the rubber ball on top of the gap between the knob and the wall, and then push down on the ball, which caught the doorknob and turned it for him, thus opening the door. He let himself out, had a merry time yelling at the squirrels, came back in, stopped a few feet inside the door, went back out, grabbed his ball, and brought it back into his kennel, a place he can leave toys if he doesn't want the other dogs playing with them.

This means he somehow worked out how doorknobs work, how fucking levers work, and that his orange rubber ball specifically was the one that would work (none of his other toys are the correct size/texture), that he'd need that ball specifically to open the door again, and yesterday he did the same trick with the bedroom door, so he knows that the rubber ball/skeleton key can be used on all doorknobs, not just that one.

I wonder if I can teach him to sweep.

___

If you want to fund Herschel's research into Tool Use and/or get me therapy for the ensuing chaos, please feel free to donate to my Ko-Fi, or get further Dog Content by subscribing to my Patreon.

[hes-a-plant]

Rewatching the part of FOTR where they’re in Rivendell and I noticed a few things:

We all joke about Elrond being super done with Gandalf after he recites the ring’s inscription in the Black Speech. But fun fact, if you pay attention you can actually see Elrond facepalm at this point. He is so done.

A bit after Frodo wakes up, we get a look at his bed. There is a statue of a winged elf(?) carved into the headboard. Elwing??

The pedestal that the ring is on? Fëanorian star carved into it.

I need Elrond’s shirt. The embroidery is so perfect.

Hobbits have gorgeous shirts made of linen (? That’s what it looks like, at least)

The collar of Sam’s shirt is clearly hand stitched, a neat detail separating him from the other hobbits, as the only working class one!

It is all the rage for elves to wear horrible velvet cloaks.

Boromir’s collar at 1:40:16. Wow? What? It’s very cool. He also has some very neat clasps that have the tree of Gondor on them!

At 1:42:05, there appears to be another Feanorian star on the ground surrounding the pedestal that the ring is on

There are lots of elf statues surrounding the Council of Elrond. I can’t make out anyone specific, but I’d be curious if anyone else can.

Legolas really likes jumping up and yelling at Boromir, lol

Wow, it looks like the number 8 is a recurring motif in Elrond’s decor. I wonder what that could mean. That’s certainly not a meaningful number at all.

Gandalf is really just wearing rags, huh. I’m glad Galadriel ends up giving him new clothes, but he could have used some a bit sooner.

While Frodo is staring at the ring, the black speech inscription is echoing in the background! Never noticed this before!

Elvish shingles are shaped like leaves

“On you who go with him, no oath nor bond is laid to go further than you will” and cut to Aragorn, who gives a grim smile to Arwen. Hmm. This one could be a stretch, but wouldn’t those two have grown up on tales of Oaths-Are-Bad?

Right as Frodo is walking through the gates of Rivendell, there’s a statue. Again, I don’t know if it’s supposed to be anyone specific, but one of y’all might be able to identify it.

Unfortunately it wouldn’t let me screenshot anything so I can’t share pictures

[yumpher]

What’s this Arwen? Art block ladies, lads, and other doo-dads (I’m so funny)

Have a complimentary violent manlet for the trouble

[fookinfandoms]

tatties | 18+

pairing: eddie munson x female reader

plot: During a night at your friends, it’s revealed that Eddie isn't the only one with tattoos. The metalhead is determined to find out just where exactly you're marked. 

authors note: pls let me know if he feels toooooo out of character! I hope this is okay :) Please leave some feedback! I’m a whore for words. 

NOT EDITED, I’ll do it later.

word count: 4.6k words. oops

warnings: 18+. minors dni, I'll kick you across the pacific, language, dirty talk, oral & fingering (f! receiving), grinding

another authors note: I can hear this gif. I like it. 86’ baby 🤸🏽

taglist: @starsxmoonsx​ @imconfused28 @phobles-world @that-lame-ghoul9000​ @arwen-rose​ @rogertaylorsfalsettogivesmehives​ @creepytoes88​ @manofworm @bamitzzsam​ @takemetoneverland420​ @shortstoriesbyher

Everyone sat on the floor in Gareth’s basement, faint music being drowned out by the loud yelling of the boys as they fight over another game. Eddie and yourself shared a beanbag, his legs spread slightly to give you room between him. His arms lay over your shoulder, his hands playing aimlessly with the chain around your neck. 

“Would you believe it if I said I was stupidly hard right now?” Eddie mumbles into your ear, immediately grinning as you begin to laugh at his reveal. “I wouldn’t move that much if I were you.” 

“Wait,” You say through heavy chuckles. “You’re telling me that’s not your belt digging into my back?” 

His arms squeeze around your shoulders a little tighter before his hands land on your arms. He rubs them in a tender way, shrugging a little in the process. “I can neither confirm nor deny.”

You slap at his thigh from its position at your side and it was Eddie’s turn to laugh as you call him a perv. He sighs as you lean your head back on his chest, Eddie giving your forehead a quick kiss. “I’m your perv though.”

“Lucky me,” You joke, knowing Eddie was no doubt rolling his eyes. “Y’know most boyfriend’s whisper poetry or some corny shit into their girls ear, but I am so glad mine tells me when he’s got a raging boner in his friends basement.” 

“Hey hey hey, you give me a raging boner no matter where we are, I think that’s super romantic.” He joins in, the two of you continuing the back and forth for a little while as the night goes on.

Gareth’s mom had brought down pizza shortly after, and you now sat on the ground by Eddie feet, having finished a game of cards with Jeff. It was fun, but soon after the music started repeating and most of the games had been played. D&D was off the table, and you all now sat in a circle in an attempt to come up with a plan. 

Eddie couldn’t be too far away from you and he slowly scooted closer, the tips of his fingers ghosting yours before he slides his hand over to intertwine your hand with his. You flinch a little at the feeling, Eddie’s eyebrows furrowing at the reaction.

“Your rings are cold.” You answer, knowing what he was wondering. He gives you a small smile, his head tilting at your words. 

“Well now you can help warm them up sweetheart.” He replies, and before you can do the same, someone gags from beside you.

Jeff gives the two of you a disgusted look, his tongue out again as he gags. Everyone laughs at his reaction knowing he wasn’t a fan of PDA. With your free hand you reach over and pat his cheek. “You’ll know how to talk to girls when you’re older bud, it’s okay!” 

He slaps your hand away, mumbling something as you all laugh harder at the faint blush on his cheeks. Soon enough, the laughter died down and everyone was throwing ideas for another game.

“Truth or dare?” You speak up, head tilted as you already began thinking about possible dares. “Pretty simple game in my eyes.”

A few mumbles of sure and other agreements met your ears, and you started the game. “Okay then, Mike, truth or dare?”

The teen sat across from you in the circle, and he sat backwards on his palms as he answered. “Dare.” 

“Sniff Jeff’s armpit for ten seconds.” You laughed instantly at his visual disgust, his mouth open in shock as your cruel dare. 

Gareth shakes his head at the dare whilst Eddie squeezes your hand as he beams down at you. “Now that’s super gross, I’m proud.” 

Mike reluctantly crawls over to Jeff, the teen already having his arm up ready. Mike glares at you as he reaches his destination. “I am so giving you a bad truth or dare when it’s your turn.” He says your name with malice before slowly turning his head, his nose meeting it’s doom. 

Eddie had a truth after that, having to pick a teacher he would French, Dustin choosing two elderly candidates much to his dismay. Afterwards, Gareth was dared to put on his mom’s makeup, you proving to be quite the makeup artist.

Mike stayed true to his word after all, and when it was your turn you chose dare. “Are you sure you want to pick dare?” He jests, his eyes narrowing at you from his spot in the Hellfire circle.

“Hit me with it.” You sit upright, your eyebrow raised as you wait for your dare. Before Mike can say anything, Eddie is pointing at him, a stern expression on his face. 

“No kissing, no stripping, if you even so much as think about bra’s I am taking off your fingernails and wearing them as earrings. Got it Wheeler?.” Your boyfriend threatens, Mike nodding at the Hellfire leader.

“Got it,” He answers, swallowing as Eddie gives him a thumbs up. “I wasn’t gonna’ do anything like that anyway, not towards her anyways.” “What’ya mean kid?” Eddie asks for you, and already you felt uneasy knowing you were at the darers mercy of a teenager.

“I was going to dare her to take off your socks.” 

“Well that’s not so bad all thin-“ Mike cuts you off before you can finish. Of course, there was no way he was going to go easy.

“With her teeth.” He finishes, his head turning back to you with an overly friendly smile. For what felt like the hundredth time that night, everyone laughed. It was your turn now to have a disgusted expression, your head turning towards Eddie who wasn’t sure what kind of reaction to have.

He wanted to laugh with the boys, but judging by your horrified look, he decided against it. He had to give it to the kid, he had a good revenge plan. “If it makes you feel any better, I actually put on a clean pair today.”  

“Yeah, they were clean at 6am this morning,” You whine at him, shivering in disgust at the idea of Eddie’s socks. “Those puppies have been cooking in there all day!”

“You gotta do it!” Mike pipes up, laughing at the way you flip him the bird. Eddie already begins to kick off his converses, and you cringe at the reveal. 

With heavy reluctance, you finish the dare, squealing and dry retching the entire way. Eddie squirmed at the feeling, almost feeling giddy at your touch. When it was completed, you kneel in front of Eddie, his eyes levelled with yours. His eyes were wide with humour, the complete opposite of yours as they narrowed. “If I look down and see a tent in those jeans… I am going to be so grossed out Eddie Munson.” 

He grins at you, shaking his head. “Does it count if I’m still hard from before?” He jokes, chuckling as you again fake vomit in his lap. He reaches forward, pulling you into his arms. You turn at an awkward angle, and like the start of the night you end up in his lap.

After a few more truths and dares from the nerds, you began playing with the lighter Gareth was dared to steal from his stepdad. Eddie had known you were in need of a new one and was the one to give his friend said dare. You were busy, distracted by the small flame to not notice Dustin calling your name.

“Truth or dare?” He asks as you finally stare at him, and the lighter is placed into Eddie’s pocket as you think.

“I don’t think I can handle anymore feet related dares so I’ll go with truth.” You grimace at the thought, ignoring the way Mike smirks. Evil.

“How many tattoos do you have?” Dustin couldn’t think of anything to ask, having used the tattoos on Eddie’s arms as inspiration. 

“She doesn’t have any Henderson.” The metalhead answers from behind you, to which you turn around to give him a confused look. 

“Except I do,” You say, wondering if he was in fact playing around. “Are you playing right now?” “Am I playing? Are you?” Eddie gives you a weird look, confusion more than evident in his brown eyes. 

“Oh my god,” You use Eddie’s legs as leverage as you stand up off the ground, keeping your eyes on him from his position below. “You’re being serious aren’t you?”

“I think I would know if you had any tatties.” He was hinting towards your many, many activities together that don’t require clothes, his brain trying to think over whether or not lately he had seen any new addition to your skin. 

“I was wondering why you hadn’t said anything, I actually thought you were just pretending not to notice but wow.” He was being serious right now, he really hadn’t seen it. 

Eddie’s birthday was coming up and he was adamant about not wanting anything. Not wanting to annoy him with gifts he didn’t want, you had gotten a tattoo for him. It was already a month old, and you were waiting for his birthday to reveal it was actually for him thinking he had already seen it. 

He goes to say something but you hold your finger up, not wanting to discuss it more in front of your friends. You turn to Dustin, the boy looking almost apologetic for asking. “I have one, technically six but it’s in one spot so.” 

“Six?” Eddie says rather loudly from the ground, his mouth shutting quickly as you again hold out your finger. You sit back down beside your boyfriend as he gives you a once over, his eyes scanning your arms and bare legs to spot any potential artwork.

The once usual chatterbox of the group remained quiet for the rest of the night, even when the others excused themselves to go home. Gareth had already pulled out the couch bed for both you and Eddie, sleepovers being a regular occurrence as you didn’t like driving late on a Friday night. 

Soon enough, you were left in the basement with your now quiet metal head, the music having been turned off and the host going to his own bed upstairs. Your overnight bag rested on a table and you searched its contents for your pyjamas, noticing the lack of clothing in the shared duffle bag. “Hey Eds’ did you pack m-“ “You were lying about the tattoos right?” He interrupts you and you put the bag down, turning around to lean against the tables edge. 

Eddie stands just a few metres away, he himself leaning against a beam with his arms crossed. The lights had been dimmed just a little, but they did nothing to hide the way Eddie’s jaw clenched.

“Have I ever lied to you?” It was true, you had never lied to Eddie and you certainly weren’t starting now.

“It’s just,” Eddie’s head tilts, his arm raising as he points at you in an almost teasing way. “I have seen nearly every inch of your body baby,” He says your pet name again, this time lowly. “If you’re telling me I've missed a spot, I’m going to feel very... very... wounded.”

“Well baby,” You reply, pushing yourself off the table and walking closer towards him. Slowly, you stand in front of him, raising your head to stare at him through your lashes. “I hate to break it to you, but you’ve definitely missed a spot.”

He frowns for a split second, his eyes narrowing as you give him a teasing smile. “Bullshit.”

“Cross my heart,” You do just that, swiping across your shirt to where your heart resides. “I swear on your guitar.”

“Oh shit.” 

“Oh shit indeed,” The room quickly started heating up, or more so you were at the way Eddie watched you. His brown eyes were noticeably darker, and so you reaches your hands forwards to hold onto his. He followed your movements, letting you hold his hand. “I actually got it for your birthday.” “My birthday?” He repeats, and you hold his hand up to your lips, kissing the back of his hand as you nod.

“I really am surprised you haven’t noticed, but when I think about it more I remember you’ve been a big fan of having me on my hands and knees lately.” Eddie instantly becomes flustered, knowing you were right. Doggy had become one of his favourite positions lately, purely because of the feeling and being able to watch himself disappear inside of you. Also because of your ass. Anyways.

“C-Can I see it? Or do I have to wait for my birthday?” He mumbles, cursing for almost sounding like he was begging. 

“Of course baby,” You pull back, dropping his hands in the process. He bites his lip almost in anticipation, wondering just where it could be. He knew it wasn’t on your back, that was one thing he was sure about. You unzip your skirt from the back, letting it fall to the ground in one swift movement. 

Stepping out of the pile on the floor, Eddie quickly looks around your now exposed thighs, frowning as he notices nothing. “I never thought I’d see you look so upset to see me in my panties.”

“Trust me, I am loving the Winnie the Pooh look right now,” He jests, his fists clenching in hopes you don’t notice just how much he is loving it. You were wearing his favourite pair, and he hoped you were wearing the matching bra. “Just wondering where these six tatties are hiding.” 

Without answering - you grab the bottom of your shirt, pulling it up and over your head and letting it go to match your skirt on the ground. 

Yeah, matching bra. Eddie praises you in his head, knowing you definitely had something planned for the two of you tonight. Almost focusing too much on your matching set, Eddie’s gaze follows the swell of your breasts before focusing on your sternum. His eyes widen at the art before him, your boyfriend stepping closer to you as he kneels in front of your tattoo. 

There in all of it’s glory were six little bats, matching the exact tattoo Eddie had on his forearm. “Two actually get covered when I take my bra off,” You break the silence, noticing Eddie was yet to say anything about his birthday present. “Forgot gravity was a thing y’know?”

“Do you have any idea how hot you are?” He stands tall once more before he himself reaches down to grab at his shirt, having already shredded his jacket earlier. Eddie  pulls his shirt off with ease, his hands immediately reaching for his belt. He curses your name as you drag your nails down between his pecs gently, the feeling making him shiver.  “Shit.” 

“So you’re not mad?” You whisper, not realising he would react this way towards some ink.

“Mad? My girl gets a matching tattoo and puts it in one of my favourite places,” Eddie shakes his head at your question, pulling his belt out of its loops before throwing it to the ground. “Nowhere near mad, just really fucking hard.”

Oh.

“Do you, fuck, do you think we should really be fucking on Gareth’s couch?” He gives you a pointed stare for even bringing your friends name up. You shrug at him, pointing back towards the small frame of the pullout bed a few metres away.

“That old things squeaks more than you do,” God Eddie looked good like this, almost like was starving and ready to devour you. His jeans were long lost to the growing pit of clothes on the floor, the two of you standing in just your underwear. 

You ignore the comment about your noises, knowing Eddie was far from complaining. Your mouth opens to ask where he had his eyes on when he almost jumps on you, the words getting lost in your thoat. 

His hands grab at your hips, picking you up and sitting you on the edge of the table behind. Eddie keeps on hand on your bare hip, the other swiping away at your overnight bag and letting it fall to the ground with a thud. A oof leaves your lips at the action, Eddie quickly stepping in between the space of your parted thighs. 

“What if someone hears us?” There were three people upstairs that could potentially hear the pair of you, and Eddie turns his head to look at the basements door. 

He frowns for just a second, immediately shrugging as he faces back to you. “I think we could be quiet.” You just give him a blank stare to which he just shrugs again. “Just say the word and we’ll go to bed.” 

There was no way in hell you were sleeping, not with how flustered he had gotten you. You shake your head, Eddie pushing away at the hair that how fallen around your cheeks. Your legs tighten around his behind, pushing him closer towards you as you lock him in. 

He mutters your name, the hand in your hair sliding down your cheek to grip at your chin as Eddie tilts your head up, his dark brown eyes keeping you focused.

“Do you want this?” He leans forward a little, his lips ghosting your own as his nose gently touches yours. “Say the word baby and we’ll get those damn pyjamas on.”

“Something,” You pull him in for a small kiss, revelling in the way he begins to grin. You part, just enough for him to reach forward again to lick at your lips as you go to speak. “Tells me you might not want to go to sleep just yet.” 

Nodding towards his straining cock in his boxers. He shrugs, not at all ashamed at the way he had absently been rubbing his front against your own. Eddie was never embarrassed at how you made him feel, and any fears in the past had definitely gone out the window. 

You reached up to his chest, dragging your nails over the various tattoos littering his pale skin. He watches your movements, shivering as you drag a nail lightly over his nipple. “I’ll sleep if you want, s’okay, really.”

The last few words came out a little more strained, and you quirked your eyebrow at him. “Eddie, I don’t want to sleep.”

“Thank god,” He fakes a prayer with his hand, laughing lowly as you smack his chest. “Because I really wanna’ do this.”

Eddie strokes your chin, the coolness of his rings a quick shock to your skin. You sigh, and his thumb slides over your bottom lip. He tilts his head, his dark hair sliding over his broad shoulders. “You wanna kiss me?” You mumble against his thumb, hoping he’ll lean forward.  He doesn't, and you sit there anxiously awaiting his next move. His boxers itch at your thighs as he takes a closer step, his head however staying away. His eyes stay fixated on you, and he takes in a small breath. “You just look so good.”

You felt unbearably warm, your slick having already begun to dampen your panties and the front of Eddie’s underwear. He quirks his eyebrow at the small wet patch, and you fought the urge to hide yourself against his shoulder. 

Eddie curses again, taking in a ragged breath and he places his hands on the table, resting just beside your parted thighs. Within seconds, Eddie has slunk to  his knees, his eyes focused on you as he stares through his messy bangs. “Eddie?” You ask, shivering as his hands begin to slide down from your thighs, over your knees to your calves, the heat of his hands stroking your smooth skin.

He parts your thighs even wider, making sure to press a kiss to your right knee as he pulls them over his shoulders. Your breath hitches in your throat as he reaches up to the waistband of your underwear, and you wiggle around helping him remove them from under you. It would've felt awkward had Eddie not looked at you with his brown eyes, his gaze becoming darker with lust as he licks at his lips. 

You’ve been eaten out before, sure, it was one of Eddie’s favourite things to do. But it felt different now, was it the looming threat of someone possibly catching you? Doing this in your friends basement? Probably. He wraps his arms around your thighs in an attempt to pull you closer, his hair instantly tickling you. You reach down, pulling his hair out of eyes as you tuck what you can behind his ears. 

Eddie gives you another kiss, this time to your inner thigh. “S’good like this sweetheart,” He mumbles as he nips at your flushed skin. “Could spend hours down here.” 

Heat had well and truely surrounded you, the tension alone enough to make you tremble. “You really like the tattoo huh?” You managed to say, Eddie glancing up at you with an eyebrow raised. 

Goosebumps litter your skin as you whimper, Eddie choosing to reply with his lips elsewhere. He usually took his time when he was on his knees, but not wanting to push his luck, his head dips further until it reaches heaven. Your mind went empty as Eddie licks a stripe up your pussy. His tongue finding your clit as you jolt beneath him.

Thank god this table was hardwood. 

A loud whine leaves your lips as he leaves a sloppy kiss on the area above your pussy and your hips almost grind against his face in an attempt to feel him where you want him most. Eddie almost chuckled at how needy you were acting, deciding against it when he remembered this was for you after all. 

You buck your hips once more, Eddie’s hands pressing into the skin of your thighs with a powerful grip. “Eddie...” You moan as you felt his tongue glide over your cunt in a slower motion. He stops again, just so he can stare into yours as you bite at your lip. 

“I really wish you could be loud right now,” He forces out, keeping his eyes on you as he lowers his head once more. He circles your clit and trails down to your entrance, continuing his teasing pace as your hands reach for the edge of the table to keep you grounded. “S’good for me, so fucking good.” 

A small cry leaves your lips as he curls his tongue and you can't help but squirm under his tender touch. Eddie revelled in, smiling as one of your hands reaches for his hair and grips it. You tug at his scalp as he presses his tongue flat against your folds, letting your thighs lock him in. 

God the noises he made. His groans were music to your ears, and you cursed yourself for deciding to have a sleepover at Gareth’s instead of Eddie’s - where you both could be as loud as you want. 

Eddie couldn't get enough, wishing he could spend eternity between your legs. He was unbearable hard in his boxers, precum leaking from his swollen tip and dampening his underwear. He decided against releasing himself, choosing to stroke at your skin instead knowing the sight of you alone could make him cum.

Your body grew hotter as a pressing need to release formed deep inside, another whine leaving your lips as you felt Eddie’s tongue stroking your most sensitive area. “You taste so good sweetheart,” His voice sounded different, a dominating yet loving tone meeting your ears. “God I love you.” 

With a shaky breath, you whispered it back, ignoring Eddie’s wink from between your legs. The sight of him on his knees before you was enough alone to make you tingle, and Eddie’s rings left indents in your thighs as he keeps you in place.  He maintained his gaze as he licked in between your wet folds again, dragging it out as you bit your lip in anticipation.

“Eddie,” You moan, quickly shushing yourself as you felt your voice get a little louder than attended. He gives you a pointed but knowing stare. “Eddie please.” 

Your head throws back, losing his gaze as he hits a certain spot. You don't even notice the way Eddie’s hand leaves your thigh as he flicks his rings off, the small pieces of metal scattering on the floor. It’s only when you feel his tongue and his fingers at your hole do you clench around him. 

You're so unbelievably wet, both your slick and Eddie’s spit combining around your thighs and on the table below. You tremble as he pushes in a finger followed by another, tears filling your eyes as he curls them inside. “I wish I could take a photo of this.” He rests his head against your thigh as he thrusts his fingers in and out, absolutely enthralled by the way your clench around him. 

So desperate to cum, your grab at his hair rougher than before, almost begging him to keep his tongue on your clit. “Don’t worry,” He nods against grip. “I got you.” 

He repeats his assault on your pussy, switching it up a little as he licks at your entrance and rubs your throbbing clit with his thumb. Your legs shake as he teased your entrance with the tip of his tongue one again. He pressed his face further into your heat, making you cry out loud until you came undone.

His name left your lips in a silent scream, Eddie licking upwards to suck harder at your clit as you convulsed under him. He groans at your movements, his own hips thrusting into the air as you cum around his lips. Your eyes squeezed shut as you came, Eddie trying hard to keep you on the table as you shifted. Arms weakening by the second, you were certain you were going to collapse forward as Eddie stood up, pulling you into an embrace. 

He held you tightly, your sweaty forehead resting against his chest as you held one hand around his waist, the other absently trailing over the soft tuft of hair disappearing below his underwear. 

“You with me?” Eddie asks, kissing your forehead as you nod against him. He pulled away, just enough to look down at you in his arms. His face glistens with your essence up to his nose, and he gives you a cheeky grin as you wipe at his mouth with the back of your hand. 

“Don’t you want to-” “Already did.” He cuts you off, not at all embarrassed as you looked down at his now softening cock hidden by fabric. Eddie shrugs at you, his free hand moving down to rearrange himself as his cum leaked through.

A small oh leaves your lips, and his grin grew. “You make me cum even when you're not with me sweetheart, having you in my mouth is like,” Eddie makes an explosion noise, his hands mimicking the action. “It’s insane.” 

“That’s oddly cute.” You quip, reaching down to run your hand over his soaked cock. He shivers under your touch, clearly not the only one feeling sensitive. 

“Give me a couple minutes and I’m yours baby.” Eddie stretches out his arms, before pushing you back. With an eyebrow raised, he reaches around to undo your bra, letting the straps slide over your arms. Your nipples were still hard, and Eddie marvels at your breasts as if he was seeing them for the first time. 

“You were right,” Your boyfriend leans forward to kiss above your tattoo. “Two do get covered without the bra.” 

[kindlythevoid]

“And [Aragorn] turned and looked away to the North under the great stars, and then he fell silent and spoke no more while the night’s journey lasted.”

Aragorn, walking away and brooding after getting a gift from his long-distance bae, The Return of the King pg. 37

Remember kids, even tho he hadn’t broken up with Arwen before leaving in the books, Aragorn will still one hundred percent mope around whenever it is brought up that he can’t see her Literally Right Now.

[welikeimagines-andfandoms]

Being Thranduils human wife who is now an old lady headcanon:

- In your age and experience you’ve learnt not to take or put up with crap so you just become sassy as hell which Thranduil loves

- Squishing Legolas’ cheeks and making sure you give him a kiss goodbye

- Look I’m just envisioning an Italian nonna and the grandma from Mulan

- Telling elder elves to shut up when they’re being stupid, what they gonna do? Yell at an old lady? You wish

- Thranduil getting you a real fancy cane if you need one

- He rubs your feet at the end of the day too

- Gimli loves you because you always feed him so well when he visits

- Falling asleep in meetings sometimes. What you gonna do? Be rude to the queen?

- Making Legolas take more food and a blanket you knitted when he goes off on adventures

- Bit of a crazy cat lady. Thranduil tried to stop you in your 60s but he realises he can’t so he just accepts his 20 cat children

- This is a bit angsty but always knowing what to say to Thranduil when he starts to worry about you dying

- Lots of “can’t get rid of me that easy”

- Everyone helping and loving you wherever you go

- Having a great friendship with Gandalf and Galadriel

- Honestly everyone, even Thranduil, are scared of you two together

- Pretty much being a grandma to all the elves

- “Elladan be nice to your brother!” “Yes, Lady y/n. Sorry, Lady Y/N”

- Always having treats in your bag that you slip to younger elves and the hobbits

- Thranduil trying to leave bed when he’s been hurt and you just stare at him until he lays back down

- Both Legolas and Thranduil holding your arm wherever you go

- Shoving people over to hold Aragorn and Arwens babies

- The comfiest elvish dresses and robes ever 👌🏻

- Not being able to ride a horse very well anymore but Thranduil still lifts you up onto the horse and holds you while you gently ride together

- Held in very high regard and respect by all elves and loved dearly by Thranduil

[spinningalbinoturtle]

Thanksgiving headcanons for the Lotr crew

Its hosted in Rivendell but Elrond lets people extend the invite to others so everyone comes

Sam is in the kitchens from 6am cooking a million things-he also brought several side dishes premade

Frodo is all over the decorations and setting the table but he also made some cookies

Arwen is also very particular about this particularly the table

She has made a seating chart which she hopes will minimize squabbling

She has also set some ground rules like no dissing on your child’s interracial marriage (for Elrond and Thranduil)

Bilbo helps Sam cook in the morning but then he starts drinking around midday and doesn’t stop til he is dragged to bed by Frodo and Erestor

While Elrond is hosting he doesn’t do much just sits around and judges

He and Thranduil will be breaking Arwen’s rules

Thranduil and Gloin out drink Bilbo. They are having a silent drinking contest which has not been spoken of. Each one just decided to out drink the other

Thranduil wins cause he drinks like three bottles of a wine a day

Gimli and Legolas are just trying to avoid their parents

Thankfully Arwen sat them at the opposite end of the table

Unfortunately near Elrond who asks several awkward questions about how elf/dwarf sex works (he’s curious from a medical standpoint)

Bilbo drunkenly tells them how he had a dwarf boyfriend once so he totally understands what they’re going through at which point Frodo cuts off his wine supply

Frodo is actually trying to slow down Bilbo’s drinking all evening but with little success

Elladan and Elrohir have bonded with Merry and Pippin who introduced them to pipeweed. The four of them are stoned out of their minds and consequently eat more than everyone else. Arwen doesn’t understand what’s wrong with her brothers.

Aragorn is in charge of the turkey. Its excellent

He is mostly trying to hide from Elrond the whole time

Boromir tries to assist him with helpful turkey roasting tidbits but Aragorn would rather just do it himself

Eventually he assigns Boromir to the stuffing- its actually not bad

Erestor keeps Elrond occupied, they hang out and play chess in the middle of all the chaos

Glorfindel is the guy who is just ready for the holiday season to start

He keeps pestering Maglor to play Yule carols but Elrond’s rule is not until after dinner

Gandalf sits around and smokes and occasionally yells at Pippin. He takes turns hanging out with Bilbo and getting him drunker, hanging out with Elrond and Galadriel

Galadriel intimidates everyone no one knows where she was before or after dinner

Celeborn brought lembas rolls and cranberry sauce

Faramir makes a mean pumpkin pie

He’s just happy to be included. He fangirls over all the elves who indulge him mostly

Eowyn is enjoying watching the antics. She can’t cook for shit so she doesn’t bother to help with that but she does help clean up

So do Merry and Pippin but only because Gandalf forced them

Eomer brings “traditional Rohirric appetizers” and its smoked horse meat. Pippin and Sam are horrified to learn this.

Everyone has their favorite: Sam’s is obvs PO-TAY-TOES. Frodo likes cranberry sauce. Merry inhales stuffing. Pippin loves rolls.

Drunkest in order of most to least would be: Thranduil, Gloin, Bilbo, Gimli, Merry, Pippin, Legolas, Aragorn (but you can’t tell), Eomer, Eowyn, Glorfindel, Sam (he would’ve drunk more but he was busy cooking), Elladan, Elrohir (they’re so high they don’t drink much) Arwen (not a big drinker), Frodo(alcohol fucks with his anxiety so he just has one glass of wine) Faramir (who’s a teatotler cause he thinks if he did drink he’d become an alcoholic).

Lots of songs are sung before people start to retire for bed

Legolas and Gimli have sex really loudly between their fathers’ rooms to annoy them

Galadriel shows up around midnight and helps finish cleaning up

The clean up crew includes Eowyn, Merry, Faramir, Pippin, Gandalf, and Legolas and Gimli. They have a great time.