#bc I will make no money student teaching. it’s a full time job with no pay

[fuck-kirk]

Still feeling so mentally unwell over the fact that the engine in my car is blown. My life is seriously spiraling bc of it.

[himynameis4]

Adult Byler Teacher Headcanons

They both teach at the same school, maybe even same district.

Will teaches art, namely Drawing & Painting I & II, as well as AP Art & Honors Drawing for Production & Design. (He also was dragged into making props for the school musical, and started/runs the school’s GSA. Mans is SWAMPED)

Mike teaches AP Language & Comp, Creative Writing, Honors English 9, and English 11. He also runs the school’s Literary Magazine, Newspaper, and Yearbook clubs. (Mans is similarly swamped)

(They’re both considering starting up an AV club & a D&D club, but where they’ll find the money or the time, they got no clue)

Will was the reason Mike first explored teaching. Mike had taken his dad’s advice & become a business major, because it can be applied to lots of jobs & is a good way to get a job quick, but… yeah, he fucking hated it.

He ended up taking one of the education courses Will was taking, trying to fulfill some credits & figuring having a class with Will would make it bearable… and then he fell headfirst into teaching

They were hired at the same time. They student taught together, too. A wave of retirees meant most of their colleagues were new blood, like them, and… well, there was A Lot of relationship drama among the staff. It was like a freakin’ soap opera. (Did my high school have a lot of interpersonal staff relationship drama? Yes, why do you ask?)

Will & Mike came out when they got married, because Will wanted to change his last name. By this point, Will was already running the school’s GSA. They hadn’t been very public about their relationship, having been there for The Sanders Affair Of 2006 (and the subsequent divorces, marriages, and affairs that came from said affair) & making the mutual decision to keep their personal lives private… but as their district became less conservative, they hadn’t exactly hidden it, either.

Their friends on the staff all know, & some are close enough friends to get invites

Will had gone by “Mr. William” for the vast majority of his career, so it wasn’t a huge shift for his students or anything.

Mike’s nickname is just “Wheeler,” a similar sign of affection—at least, to his face.

(His students call him “Hot Wheels” behind his back)

(Will is well aware of this, & endlessly amused)

Will’s hair has gone entirely grey. (Lonnie’s genetics, rip). Post-covid, he uses blue light glasses… unlike mike, who needs glasses full-time. (Will teases him about this quite frequently)

Mike finishes growing his hair out, but ditched the bangs. He’s one of those teachers who always has his hair in a severe ponytail (he likes manbuns, too, but you wont often see him with one bc We’re At Work, Will, I Must Be Professional)

They Do Not Talk About The Mullet Era

Or The Bowl Cut For The Entirety Of The Childhoods

They have matching rings, customized replicas of the One Ring bc they’re both geeks. They’re engraved to say “crazy together” in elvish. Technically these were their engagement rings… and also the rings they used when they got a domestic partnership, and also the rings they used in their wedding ceremony. For a long time, they wore them like necklaces tucked under their shirts (bc the Mike in the Math department & Sydney from Social Studies are MASSIVE gossips, and also bc LoTR is iconic & these two are cheesey af),

They started wearing them openly when Will changed his last name, though.

Will & Mike are the teachers who let students eat lunch in their classrooms. The ones who invite them in during free periods. The ones who hear about the shitty chem teacher, the asshole ex, the awful divorce, the toxic friend group, the impending move. They’re the ones who collect & display dozens of senior photos, whose hands cramp from writing yearbook messages, and the ones whose students will remember years later. They’re the ones who keep in touch—they get wedding invites and scattered letters and life updates.

Because they’re the ones who remember what it’s like to be 14, 15, and feeling like the world was about to end. They remember the bullies. They remember the isolation. They remember how awful it feels to grow apart from the people you used to hold dear, and how much they hated high school.

It’s why they love being teachers, exhausting as it is. They’re the adults they didn’t get in high school, despite their parents’ best efforts—they get to be the support they desperately needed. They get to watch their kids grow, and its so, so satisfying to know they’re giving the kids better than what they had.

But most importantly? They’re happy.

[justamarvelnerd]

stuff i love (but mostly hate) about the IB:

Love:

- I’ve created a social identity with other IB students. (basically there’s a “we” in “we’re all suffering” as opposed to “i’m suffering”)

- the social identity is really honestly the greatest thing about the IB because I feel like we all think kind of the same, yk? we are all so stressed and scared but it’s kind of invigorating that we know we are all here together

- kind of related to that, I have some bragging rights about breaking through the IB fog after testing in May. I can say I did the hardest thing I’ve ever done, regardless of if I make good enough scores for sophomore status in college

- Colleges love IB students because hooray college prep give us all your money

- SMART CULTURE. I’m known as “that smart kid” in my family*

- conversations with IB students you can ONLY have with IB students. One time, my school put on a festival, and kids were running around playing, doing activities, having a good time yk. And within all this ruckus, a group of like ten students was standing out in the hallways laughing and arguing over what the correct chemical formula for cobaltic hydroxide was (COOH3 btw). that is a normal, everyday conversation at my school, and these people had to have been younger than me because i’m a senior and didn’t know them

- also, we’re all very tight knit. we kind of have to be. if you don’t leave before freshman year, or even up until junior year, you see so many of the kids around you dropping like flies to go to a normal comprehensive high school.** the size of my senior class as it stands right now is 72 people. i don’t know of anyone in my class that doesn’t know me by name.

- my teachers are WICKED smart.

- my handwriting has become phenomenal because all of our essays are handwritten.

Hate:

- even though it’s “we’re suffering”, it’s still yk. suffering. lmao it isn’t meant to be fun

- *being “that smart kid” means I feel like I’m being held to the standard that I’m meant to be smart and have all the answers all the time, and when I don’t, I feel like I’m failing at… my identity? if that makes sense? makes me feel really, really crappy

- when sleep schedule is screwed, it’s screwed BIG TIME. there’s no happy medium.

- forget to eat in favor of study/ procrastination

- pretty sure those fainting spells were because of forgetting to drink water. whoops

- **i am the only African-American person in my entire grade. the only other Black person in class of ‘23 is Nigerian, and she happens to be one of my closest friends.

- it gets really lonely.

- sometimes, my teachers are so smart that what are basic concepts for them are incredibly complicated concepts for me, and when they skim right past them i can’t get my bearings

- long nights spent watching youtube videos on biology concepts could all be retrieved if my biology teacher had explained them better for me.

- THE IB IS NOT ADHD OR AUTISM-FRIENDLY AHHHHHHHHHHH. THE 504 PLAN HAS RUINED MY PERCEPTIONS OF WHATEVER “ACCOMMODATION” IS SUPPOSED TO MEAN.

- i find that schools in general are not very neurodivergent-friendly. a solution to lack of focus becomes sit in a quiet room by yourself with a ticking clock in the corner that you just can’t block out because it’s just So LOUD and this room is too bright and someone’s watching me from the corner of the room for some reason why do i need supervision i don’t even know what this assignment is asking me to do and i can’t even ask that random staff member watching me because that’s not their job and they aren’t my teacher bc he’s busy teaching all the rest of the class that can keep up with him.

- just no.

but anyway. i don’t know that i’d trade the experience I’ve had with the IB. Character development, yk? and i’m aware it isn’t for everyone.

idk what kind of person i’d be if i hadn’t decided to go through with attempting to get a full IB diploma. i wonder whether i would be as thoughtful as i am now.

[officialkatie]

just putting a long vent under a read more (i hope)

i should have guessed that after a week of sleeping well (bc sick) i wouldn’t be able to sleep. also i hate my monday class. i have 10 left but god at what cost its completely unbearable and the professor is one of the reasons i dont want to teach anymore. how could you say to people going to school to be a teacher “youre gonna be so stressed and good luck bc it sucks”

i know i dont want to be a teacher anymore and im finishing my degree to get the job i DO want. but at the same time i dont want any job. i hate working. how do people do it. how has my high school italian teacher taught in the same place for 51 years and still going? how does he not feel defeated? i havent even started a Real Job yet and i hate it. i havent had a moments peace or a day without something looming over me since ever. since at least before covid. but then that added ANOTHER thing to loom over me that will never go away.

i hate that i have to have a checklist in my mind of all the things i have to do before i graduate. it should be easy!

-finish classes

-student teach

-get certification

but its NOT that easy. bc in order to finish classes thats this semester. thats 10 more sucky mondays with an awful professor in which i also have to observe 15 hours at a school (on top of the 100 required hours i already did, im not currently in a school and i didnt know about this and we were all so pissed and just another reason i hate this professor), 1 more week of incredibly intensive classes which GREAT! more time for the stinky class. 9 more tuesdays bc the schedule is so weird, all while working part time and doing homework and figuring out student teaching and having personal responsibilities and a relationship and maintaining my health. its no wonder im sick. then once the semester is over its work work work. bc i cant work while i student teach. no break for katie. i have to focus on holidays and pretending to care about people who cant even remember my birthday. its not that hard to remember. i remember all of yours so whats up with that. then i go to orientation for student teaching and then i do it. i dont know where yet! bc i have to email the man who’s been screwing me over every step of the way (another thing for the to do list). and once a week while i student teach i go to a seminar class. a new update to the academic schedule means my class could end at 10:40 pm. who does that. i live an hour away from campus. if my class ends at 10:40 im going to fail. then i do that for “75” days (in quotes bc there’s not even 75 school days in the spring semester yet thats my requirement?) and then i graduate. should be easy peasy. then i go to the real word and back to my part time job while i look for real job so i can move out and live with the one person who gets me and doesnt make me feel bad for living. and we’re gonna have a great life together but thats another to do list. find an apartment find a job move pay rent pay utilities try not to kill yourself make friends even though you’re socially inept ever since leaving college and your social life is in shambles. eat healthy.

im literally a mess and im so congested and i hate not sleeping and this is just making it worse. i have james taylor in my head and my stomach hurts so bad bc i ate like shit today. i wish i could turn off my brain and i tried using headspace app and thats another thing. i updated my student status and they sent me a confirmation. yet charged me for full price. and you cant even unsubscribe yourself. you need to email someone and so i did and they sent me back “we got ur email! sorry we’re taking so long:(((“ and charged me with a full smile on their stupid faces. if i can figure out how to rip from that app you bet your asses i will

i really need a break.

i feel so bad getting this degree and its not bc im wasting my own money. my parents are paying and they’re so supportive and dont care that id rather do something education-adjacent and my boss at my part time job says she’d be so happy to have me while i figure my shit out after graduation. all i have to do is drag my lifeless body across the stage at graduation. i have a part time job after that and i wont be tackling things alone after that. i have good references and im qualified for the job i want. all i have to do is get there but its SO HARD and i can’t stop thinking about how much its going to take to get me there. its like looking at a number line. sure YOU see the whole number integers but to me there’s a universe in between 1 and 2 and 3 and 4 and 5. im trying so hard to not get caught up in those universes but man does that take brain capacity i do not possess.

if i have to work forever into an endless oblivion im going to hit myself in the face with a brick. i love having days off and going to museums and walking through the park and going around to coffee shops and record stores and just enjoying life. if my quality of life enjoyment is diminishing NOW what will it be like when i have to go to work every day instead of having off two days a week for school and to catch up on life?? am i doomed to be boring and hate life?? how can i live if i cant LIVE? (2 am drama,everyone.) the thought of taking “personal days” seems like hell to me. i just dont want to work on a schedule like that. i can give 10000% at work its been seen its been done but i control the schedule right now. take that away and it’s over

at least my dog barking at 2 am did not wake me up. i am already up sir and i feel like my butt is on fire. and my legs are so restless.

and another thing? he’s barking bc my sister is coming home. ever since she moved back home things are worse for me. she’s so messy and i am so not and it really gets under my skin and overwhelms me. and she is inconsiderate of other people and takes my stuff. why do i have to parent my older sister. doesnt she know she’s building up my resentment for her. i dont want to spend time with her and my mom looooves to guilt me about it bc of her relationship with her sister. but then she and my dad go and mumble under their breath about how they cant wait for her to finish her masters thesis (not gonna happen,im gonna graduate with my masters before her and she’s two years older than me and has been working on thesis for 3+ years now) and leave bc she’s turning our house into a trainwreck. why cant she just live with her boyfriend who is (to me) deadbeat. nice guy but like i dont even know what his job is? is there one? (also not fair to him bc the standards for partners in my family have been set verrry high: see above future roommate. he is universally adored while sister bf? jury is still out. also i maintain that my sister is a homewrecker. i guess both figuratively and literally at this point.)

anyways my tumblr is getting laggy so i guess thats my sign to end this. im sure that i will not sleep.

[bqstqnbruin]

my roommates and i were talking about how poorly teachers in america are treated!

one of my friends moms quit teaching in the middle of the year bc treatment from admin and like parents and students got so bad. like she didn’t have time for lunch bc they took away planning periods since they needed more teachers to be available to teach so she had to use her lunch as planning time 🙁 she was like half a year away from getting tenure benefits too.

and like that teacher from virginia who got pew pewed at by one of her students… multiple complaints to admin. one of them being a student who was sobbing because she saw him pull it out… insane.

and now florida is banning books that celebrate diversity…. ones that talk about culture… ones about having same sex parents… it’s shocking to me honestly. and yet republicans say that they too accept gay people or people of different colors or different religions… yet they do this. and they claim the left are indoctrinating the children but they are the ones continuing to ban books…. because what? it’s not something that WASPs enjoy? teachers are now having to hide their books because of this.

like teachers are like parents, therapists, an additional school nurse, babysitters, and still have to teach?? it’s insane how poorly teachers are treated and how little they get paid. like i remember one of my teachers had to take on two additional jobs outside of teaching…. or like most teachers at my school try to be coaches because it gives them a little extra money. it’s just crazy to me how things are the way they are

We literally get paid the equivalent of like $1 per child in our classroom like c'mon

and then I see everyone saying "BUT YOU GET PAID SUMMERS OFF" like bestie I am unemployed during the summer my school withholds part of my pay check so that they can continue to send me money during the summer, that's just the money that I earned during the year, I am only paid for 180 days

I literally put in 12 hours of work almost every day and people are still saying we don't deserve pay

and like you said, there's students and other people literally trying to kill teachers, republicans keep trying to sensor education and are making the teachers into the enemies of the public and then they complain when there are no qualified teachers to teach anymore. Schools in Missouri have to do 4 day weeks because there aren't enough teachers to do a full school week

[knee-stockings]

Hi there!

So I don't know if you're taking anymore asks. If you are yay haha! Anyway I was wondering how do you get into the tutoring business. Like I see others and want to do it as well. I love helping others but there's some subjects I'm really good in.

Sorry and thank you

Hello anon dear! Ofc my asks are open, hmu literally whenever (but if I don’t reply after a while, remind me bc I can be forgetful 😅)

So anyway I’m gonna assume that you’re talking about getting into remote tutoring? I’m not sure if you mean as a part time side job or as a full time tutor either, but what I’ve been doing is just for some extra money on the side. I’ve been with the company Varsity Tutors and there are lots of pros and cons, but in general I enjoyed helping the kids and talking to the parents.

I’m gonna ramble on under a read more, but also feel free to send another ask and/or message with questions, I’m happy to help!! ☺️

If you like to teach and help others, good at communicating and you have plenty of patience, then you can be a great tutor! Patience levels may vary based on kid’s age and/or current skill level.

The way I found VT was through some online job board, I wanna say Indeed…not sure if you’re American, anon, but I’m also talking from that perspective too btw. Anyway there was an online interview process and they contacted me to start. Now, this is mainly about tutoring through a website. I don’t know a lot about tutoring as a fully independent tutor, but I do have some advice to give in that regard.

Pros: they supply the clientele, so you don’t have to go hunting them down yourself. There are plenty of opportunities, especially during the school year. It’s not too hard to choose the hours/days you wanna work. You can easily go part or full time (if you’re able to arrange your schedule lol) If someone cancels last minute you can still get paid for your time. Sites like VT have learning centers that tutors and students can use to work together. VT specifically has like a video chat + whiteboard, so I can talk to the kids and put up problems or draw or whatever. You can choose who to tutor based on your skills, like I did English and Math but if someone wanted a higher level of math than I can do, I could just refuse.

Cons: you have to be wary of clients that just want you to do homework/write essays for them. (I always say I’ll do it with them, not for them, and usually they just refuse. If I get uncomfortable enough I just leave. Not worth my time.) The pay isn’t the best but it’s okay, however as far as I know they charge clients a lot more than what we tutors get. A big con was communication for me, mainly VT’s fault, sometimes clients themselves. Mainly not letting me know when sessions needed to be canceled - though I still got paid, I did have to waste time just sitting there, staring at a blank screen. The learning center was great except when it wasn’t, as in technical difficulties galore. Sometimes I even had to call the kids over my own phone to get things done. There’s a lot of pressure on you as the tutor to come up with your own lesson plans. VT does have a couple problem sets that you can use, but for the most part I had to make and/or look up my own problems. Free worksheets are your friend.

This is very long already but there may be more, I can’t think of anything else rn 😅 note that all of these might not apply to all tutoring sites. If you wanna know anything else lmk!

[ryugujitr]

Goodmorning or afternoon, evening or g'night.

In this week's bulletin of "What the actual FUCK", we will discuss;

FUCK MORNINGS

'Photoshop? Nope, but I'mma teach u anyway'

Laughing at drama queens is 🤡bad🤡

Feminism vs Opinions

I ain't yo ma'

FYCK MORNING CLASSES- COMMUTING ISNT AS PAINFUL AS WAKING UP 3 HOURS B4 CLASS AND REALISING HOW ILL BE WASTING TIME IN CLASS BC THE WOMAN DOesn'T KNOW SHIT SINCE SHE SPECIALISES IN PRINT. But you know what- you can't say anything bc respect your lecturers and also set THE STACKS OF MONEY U HAVE TO PAY FOR TUITION FEE ON FIRE.

This OWMAN. OH MY GOD THIS WOMAN. SHE IS PISSY AND DEFENSIVE FOR THE SLIGHTEST OF THINGS. GIRL- YA DONT KNOW HOW TO USE PHOTOSHOP OR ANY OTHER ADOBE SOFTWARE-

🤡QUIT.THE.COURSE 🤡

But noooooOoOOo WE MEET HER 6 TIMES A WEEK AND EVERY CLASS IS FUCKING CHAOS- BRUH. And These little devils think distracting her is fun- like EXCUSE ME HAHAHAHAHAHAH- THE FUCK WILL U WRITE IN YOUR EXAMS@??????????????? SOME OF US ACTUALLY WANT THIS DEGREE SO WE CAN WORK , NOT RELY ON A MAN FOR THE REST OF OUR LIVES.

OH OH AND THEN- while the chaos is at full blast this girl is just; 'LeT heR sPeaK atleast LISTEN TO MISS FIRST'

And

This hoe- had been distracting and barfing out useless comments since the class started- says 'So *snifFs* we CanT evEn aSk questioNs *forces a fake sob* 🤡🥲

SO WHY WOULD U NOT LAUGH? AND I WAS JUST: PFFT and

the lecturer is just: WHY ARE U LAUGHING AT HER

Like bruh...she is lying. I am laughing at her AUDACITY OF DERAILING THE CLASS AND PRETENDING TO ACT LIKE SHE CARES AND YOUR STUPIDITY. But kay I guess ....

So TURNS OUT IN THIS CENTURY AND DAY-

Someone comes up to me and asks "Are you a feminist?"

And your boi was literally looking for her STUDENT ID SHE LOST AGAIN, n i was like "Why."

"because you're so confident and strong headed- im glad to see young women who are opinionated enough to take a stand even if they are in the wrong."

Mind you, if my hand wasn't in my bag it would've been down that bitch's throat. AND she is younger than me too and HAD NEVER CONVERSED WITH ME BEFORE, EVER. EVEN IF IM WRONG? THE DEBATE WASNT EVEN A DEBATE I WAS ASKED ABOUT MY OPINION N I GAVE IT TO THE LECTURER WHO AGREED EITH ME AND IT HIT ME-

To this day, a WOMAN'S OPINION- only shows she's a FEMINIST- bc an opinion is something ONLY A MAN CAN HOLD. Since, you know...FEMALES aren't humans .....

Finally, we planned on complaining about the lecturer's LACK OF KNOWLEDGE ABOUT OUR DEGREE YET HER AUDACITY TO TEACH. SO- I was like, I ain't complaining cause ya'll gonna back out.

HIGHKEY- TRU BC THE COMPLAINT LINGERED ON FOR 2 WEEKS N MOST OF tHESE HOES DIPPED.

And yesterday, as I walked out of The cafeteria after discovering INFLATION IS A BITCH- this random girl comes to me and is just:

🤡- Hey bestie what happened for the complaint?

🫥: Idk

🤡- GoD yOu're so Usless you Have ONE JOB, AREN'T yOu lIke onE of ThoSe smaRt Kids?

🫥: smart I am, your mother, I am not.

If i could, i would've socked her in the face too, but their were too many witnesses.😏🧐

💗❣️So, that concludes our second week's therapy session.❣️💗

BUT PLEASE TELL ME, HOW YOU DOIN? HOW WAS UR WEEK? GOT ANY NEWS ABOUT LITERALLY ANYTHING - I'LL TAKE IT.❣️💗

(i had to put readmore so ppl wouldnt have to scroll endlessly)

MISS GURL - WHAT IN THE FRIENDS’ NAME IS YOUR circus COLLEGE DOIN?

6 TIMES A DAMN WEEK? I WOULDNT EVEN BE ABLE TO STAND TWO- LIKE AM I MISSIN SOME SHIT HERE OR???

nah cuz that stanky ass bitch asked u “WhY aRe YoU lAuGhIng” i wouldve sent a chair flying in her face bc girl nobody paid your dumbass to be here, it aint nobody’s fault but yours that you got stuck teachin shit you dont even know about like nobody did that for you but yourself

ALSO - WHOS THE HOE THAT SAID YOU’RE USELESS FOR NOT DOIN THE JOB SHE KEPT COMPLAININ ABOUT? also legitimately what the actual fuck was that person thinking when asking if you’re a feminist…….. why.

perhaps the kugelblitz or general apocalypse would have been a good idea here. some people just make this world a terrible place, as IF WE DIDNT HAVE ENOUGH TO DEAL WITH ALREADY FOR FUCKS SAKE YKNOW??? TOTALLY NOT MHMMM

And thank you for stopping by and checking up bestie, i am also having a rather horrific start of my last year of this bullshit jungle circus school.

first of all; EVERYONE IS ATTACKING US FROM EVERY SINGLE FUCKIN DIRECTION ABOUT TESTS, STUDYING AND CHOOSING WHICH HIGH SCHOOL TO GO TO (as if last year wasnt fuckin plenty enough of stress), TEN TIMES WORSE BECAUSE ITS OUR LAST YEAR AND “we’re mature, we’re older, we should be smarter and wiser”………. RIGHT.

second of all - we miraculously have a new student in our shitty class (GIRLIE YOU COULDVE PICKED ANY OTHER FUCKIN CLASS, WHY THIS ONE FILLED WITH IDIOTS???) which is weird, not in a rude way but like…… transferring last year to another school seems more stressful than trying to find a needle in a haystack within one hour, considering 1. you dont know anyone or anything here now 2. you barely have friends and 3. the grading system is entirely diff and fucked way more than your past school so idk how this girl is going to make it but im gonna try look out for her from the shadows and help when i can.

third of all - WE DONT HAVE A SINGLE BREAK EXCEPT FOR WHEN YOU HAVE A RELIGION RELATED HOLIDAY (i have one in october - A SINGLE DAY) AND A SINGLE LITTLE SAD FUCKIN FRIDAY UNTIL THE 30TH OF DECEMBER. WHO MAKES IT OUT ALIVE UNTIL THEN IS A FUCKIN PSYCHOPATH BECAUSE I SURE AINT, WHO TF IS MENTALLY STABLE ENOUGH TO BE COMFORTABLE FOR THIS SHIT AINT NO FUCKIN WAY THATS ME

fourth of all, the teachers are twats- worse than ever before. they’re harassing us from every direction because its our last year, we have to behave, we have to study, keep in line - BUT LET ME GET THIS STRAIGHT, IM NOT DOING THAT. THE NEXT TIME SOMEONE DARES SPEAK TO ME IN A WAY I DONT LIKE IM SOCKING THEM IN THE FACE, DRAGGING THEM OUTSIDE OF SCHOOL BY THEIR WIG AND BANGING THEIR HEAD AGAINST THE RAILS UNTIL THEY GET A. CONCUSSION. IM NOT HAVING IT.

fifth of all - i was extremely close to getting into a fight and beating the shit out of a girl (lets call her B for Bitch) from my class. im gonna make one thing clear - i hate liars, despise them to the core. i hung out with B and a couple other two girls at lunch and she began literally speedwalking when one of those two girls told me that B asked her why im hanging out with them randomly. i immediately yelled at her dumbass to stop running from her problems and turn around cuz im not a kindergarten teacher, she stopped in her tracks and i told her if she was so bothered by me she should tell me instead of being a coward and talking shit behind my back. she got extremely uncomfortable and didnt dare even look me in the eye for the rest of the day and tbh she should be glad she didnt.

as expected, im definitely not gonna be anything like allison or klaus this year - i’ll be going on a yelling and beating spree from how annoyed people already get me here. my class absolutely didnt change for the better, when they all grow up im betting my left eye they’ll be living a sad life in this country fr.

anyway, ur homegirl will be alone at lunch in the bathroom listening to tua music and probably scrolling thru media bc whats better than learning tua footloose dance in the school bathrooms 💀💀💀

overall you and i both are gonna have a tough year it seems, i’ll always be here for therapy sessions tho dearest 😭😭🖤🖤🖤

[jagerist]

aot characters as college students

college student aot

pairing: none

warning(s): shitpost.

a/n: just for funsies. def shitpost.

characters: eren, armin, mikasa, jean, connie, sasha, hange, levi, zeke

eren

- got a full ride scholarship

-does not try hard enough

-says that if he loses his scholarship he will just take student loans and try again

-parties 25/8

-throws the parties (mainly bc he doesn't trust himself to find his way home after)

-will show up to class still drunk (but with sunglasses so 'noone knows')

-flirts with professors (does not help his grades any) ((he knows he just likes the conversation))

-will boot for underage friends. no questions. ("gabi you want a 24? that'll be $50." "why $50?" "25 for the 24 and 25 for me putting my ass on the line"

-no extracurriculars.

armin

-full scholarship.

-studious as fuck

-will go to parties with eren tho (will not admit it but feels like he has to make sure eren doesn't do something stupid)

-will tell eren its a bad idea to boot (will take a cut tho)

-knows his limits for alcohol. will NOT drink on a school night.

-lowkey flirts with professors and does get better grades for it. (it is what he deserves. the master manipulation is not his fault)

-is in extracurriculars, but mostly bc they look great on resumes.

-is student body president.

mikasa

-this girl parties.

-like, a lot

-rivals eren.

-manages to go to class and get good grades regardless.

-never has hangovers.

-the only one ever coherent enough to call a cab home.

-smokes weed, but does not make it her personality.

-somehow found herself in a sorority. she hates it, but they love her.

-has a major following on her finsta about the school where she shitposts

jean

-douchebag (but like a loveable one)

-if you are his friend he is a great person

-otherwise, dick.

-thinks he drinks as much as eren, is infact a lightweight.

-skips class all the time but somehow doesn't fail. (its bc connie will give him his notes)

-flirts with professors and had to have a meeting with the dean abt harassment. ("just bc I called her a milf?" "yes, jean. you cannot call the staff milfs." "damn.")

-smoked weed once, swore he saw jesus. (it was just zeke, b ut everyone plays along, including zeke.)

-posts thirstraps. the only comments are from connie ("yaaaaaas go best friend.")

-armin spams vomit emojis. so does sasha.

-his insta is followed by everyone, but just bc they want to laugh.

connie

-IS THE WEIRD SMOKER

-weed socks, bob marley sweaters, drug rugs.

-had shrooms once, thought. jean was a girl. was a weird night.

-wakes and bakes before class every day.

-good grades, he tries.

-works at Mcdonalds for extra cash, but has to borrow everyone's weed bc he's too broke.

-noone knows where his money goes (they're too scared to ask.)

-everyone gives him their weed bc its connie. he's good for it.

-he isn't good for it, but that's okay.

-only had one girlfriend, they broke up because his apartment had roaches. he called them his pets. he was trying to teach them a musical routine, she didn't like it.

-juice world shrine in his room.

-led lights galore.

sasha

-okay grades, has to put in effort.

-honestly kinda only in school for funsies

-the most fun at a party.

-will convince everyone to play games.

-beerpong champion.

-will bring out the karaoke machine. (in connies trunk just incase they need a spontaneous karaoke night. they have to have two mics bc she hogs one.)

-was dragged into mikasas sorority, stayed bc they have weekly meetings with provided food.

-is a country girl, will wear cowgirl boots in class.

-living her hannah montana fantasy.

hange

-incredibly studious.

-asks so many questions

-never satisfies with the answers

-took over a lecture once when they thought the prof wasn't doing a good enough job explaining the topic.

-brings poppers to parties

-blackout every time.

-never late for class though.

-like mikasa, never had a hangover. (thinks they're a myth)

-takes the mass amt of courses in a semester. tried to fight that they could do more.

-threatened dean once.

levi

-4.0 gpa.

-does not try.

-naturally smart as fuck

-will get a job in whatever field he wants.

-got high with connie once. (saw a roach and swore to never go back)

-dd. (not that he wants to, just everyone starts drinking as soon as they get there. fuck slow down.)

-makes sure everyone is safe, but will document everything they do and hold it over their heads.

-got pissed at eren and locked him outside in winter. forgot about him.

-thought he killed him and had to defrost him in the car for two hours before he dropped him off at home.

-gaslit eren into thinking it didn't happen.

-will take everyone thought he dt before he drops them off. will never use his card though bc the drunk fucks don't pay back.

zeke

-was really smart in college, but aint in uni anymore but still goes to the parties.

-dad friend

-will provide snacks

-dont ask abt his life

-he will cry abt it and ruin the mood.

-one time him and eren started talking abt their dad and shit got really heated. they ghosted each other for a month.

-has bitches, one for everyday of the week if he wanted.

-flirts with professors but will actually fuck them (since he's not a student anymore of course)

-rumour that he fucked the dean. (will not confirm or deny)

[the-fandom-is-now-my-life]

Hc inverse au! Fem Reader in Victorian era England and ynm characters are in our time.

You are a character in an anime and ynm are in real life

Williams

( he seems like the type to be into really dense, historical mangas)

He first read a manga featuring you when one of his students left their copy on their desk and he had to overview some students while they were using the presentation room.

He mostly just sat in the first row while the group of teens were recording hamlet for the theater class.

He didn't really took the story seriously so he started reading a lady who was trying to seduce a noble for a few pages, he was about to leave the manga given that he supposed it was a hentai but when you poisoned them with the wine cup he found it interesting

The main character had a set of very strong ideals that weren't so common in the historical context, be it strip nobles and royals from benefits, be a suffragette, or something similar .He ate the manga in five minutes

When he returns home (and leaves the item in lost objects, ofc) he checks online to buy the first volume to see if the background and sort are interesting along with every other volume and official light novel and Novella . He usually isn't home from very early to very late at night so it would be Louis most likely the one who receives the box with the books

"Brother, did you buy a box full of comics" Louis asks from the kitchen after he feels his older brother returning home

" oh? They already arrived? I thought they would be here next week" well Louis always was worries about how his brother didn't have any hobbies aside from teaching at the University so he was happy that he found something else to do with his life

He would ask for a sick day on a Monday or Friday so he could plan everything that was needed at his class that day and spend the weekend lazing around and reading the various volumes and the light novels. That day Louis and albert almost cried of happiness, that was the first time he took a sick day in all of his teaching years to take a break

The type of fan who creates theories that everything is symbolism, how they are ambidextrous to show that even if they intend good sometimes their methods are too extreme or how their hat was placed or the color of their clothes show their political affiliation. Nothing can be just a coincidence with him, everything means something

Is a big pain in the ass about historical inaccuracies, be it dress, manners or social hierarchy being off

" But listen this is the late Victorian era, where is their crinoline??/ They are supposed to be a Victorian dandy and the writer wants me to believe they would wear that? In that society?" williams turned on the lights to his younger brother room while walking in circles as if he was trying to calm down

" Williams it's 3 am. Please I want to sleep"

" Oh and don't let me get started when they crossdressed/dressed as lady northinburg, that tight lacing scene made me so angry" he was dragging his words, Louis guessed he was sleep drunk " how much I hate that, karolina or bernadette would kill those producers if they saw it" Louis simply opted to sleep while his brother was ranting about how the hairstyles were al wrong

When speaking of merchandising he appreciates his mature and elegant reputation so he would buy small things like cute stationery and notebooks and a few pens. Most of them either are about the main character, you, or have the anime title or something similar

A few students think that the professor brings some childish pens in case some student forgets one and he doesn't have to give them his mechanical pencil. He actually uses those pens when he is grading the exams. His notebook annotations look a lot cleaner and are more colorfully bc of the markers and pens

When and if your manga gets and anime he would be 100 percent bitching about how they skipped, if you are a minor character, scenes where you are introduced or you character gets development.

" Oh my goodness, they skipped to this ark? And 'the mask'? In that ark we get the development of many characters, yn, edward, Amélie, Alex. We are absolutely robed of their backgrounds and aspirations and how they are all connected"

" Brother be honest with yourself, you only wanted more animated yn, you follow their voice actor on twitter"

" That is not my point!"

Albert

he was watching it when he came late

Albert usually keeps company to his youngest brother until around 5-6 pm, then he leaves for work and returns around 12 am and eats dinner alone mostly.

When he returns from his job the house is more often than not totally dark so he makes his way to the kitchen and microwaves the leftovers and eats silently.

But one day it seems like Louis or williams forgot to turn off the TV before going to bed, he was about to turn it off but decided that watching something with the tv muted wouldn't wake his brothers up and kept watching.

He didn't pay much attention to it at the start but it became routine, he comes home, heats the food, sits down and watches that show so he grew quite fond of it

How much attention he pays to it depends on the type of plot it has, if it is light-hearted humor he would most likely not pay much attention but laugh when a joke came, one the other hand, if it's a more serious he would find it hard to take his eyes away from the screen

Second least likely to buy merchandising, if he buys it's mostly to wear home, a one size too big shirt for a pj (mostly for the comedy anime) or, if they aren't childish and look professional maybe a pocket watch like the one x character uses ( in the more serious one)

Won't buy the mangas if there are any because he is happy watching the animated version and already has to read a lot at work, but if he is gifted the volumes he will read them sparingly, maybe he will finish one volume every week and a half, unlike williams.

Louis

He spends most of his time home because of his illness and doesn't like to stress too much given that it makes the symptoms worse, he enjoys light hearted comedies or cooking in the victorian era or those typical time travelers who now have to live in different situations than those they are used to

He most likely found it after doing all the housework and being bored so he opted to browse the TV or netflix and fell on one specific serie

If it is a comedy he will listen to it while cleaning or cooking, he feels like he does everything faster and the housework is more enjoyable that way.

If it's a cooking related program he will watch as entertainment after doing everything and to get ideas what to cook, he is always surprised with the recipes that your character comes up with, be them savory ( things he will absolutely do the next day for lunch or dinner) or sweet ( things he will make more sparingly given he can't have too much sugar). I think of mangas and series like the duchess' 50 te recipes or shokugeki no soma

If it the third option he was interested on the alternatives to modern things, like how to make a more natural soap with animal fat and wood ash, or how to use certain plants to help a headache or stomach bug.

With merchandising he doesn't buy much, some kitchenware and some bowls mugs and maybe a tea set that isn't much of an eyesore. Overall he isn't all that crazy over that kind of things if there is a cooking book he will definitely buy it

He, like albert, doesn't care much about historical accuracy and if the events that happen are cohesive, he is there to have fun

Fred

He watched it because he heard his classmates talk about it and wanted to join them but was too scared to bother them if he didn't know anything. Baby has the social abilities of an anxious lobster

He comes home from college and looks the anime up in his phone and, like every broke college student, he watches it from an illegal streaming service.

He gets hooked up and stays all night watching it until his clock snaps him out of his trance and makes him drag his feet to his 7:30 am class

Fred tries and fails to talk to the group so, after the lesson, he drags himself to his room to be miserable alone. It's not until he reaches a certain chapter or episode where you say something that make him think, " if you wish to be loved you must face first your fear to be known" he keeps thinking about it, he didn't truly ever talk to the group, he cowarded before even trying.

The next week at that same lecture he approaches the group and tries to make some small talk

" Oh hey uhm i heard the past class that you liked (maga name)" he was this close to running to his desk and act as if nothing happened

" Yeah! You like it too?" The boy seemed to notice fred was nervous

" Yes! I really like it, what is you favorite character? Mine is yn" he certainly didn't have any favorite one before but after this he thinks your character is pretty good " they are really inspiring"

In terms of merch he is broke so there is none, If he had any money to spare he would buy notebooks and even those chibi statues or funko pops

[homosociallyyours]

22!

if you could write your own TV show, what would it be like?

NONNYYYYY you just came for my heart here!!! i have A LOT of tv show ideas! I’m just gonna spit one out: 

ensemble comedy set in a chain coffee store. the employees are diverse and so is the clientele, and mostly we get to see regular people trying to make enough money to survive at a kinda shitty customer service job. there are some custies who are full cast members: person who works from the cafe but nobody can exactly tell what they do (a regular running gag is that someone thinks they’ve figured it out and then that theory is disproven); unhoused person who isn’t treated as a joke or a menace, but a full human being; student/single parent. 

The staff is comprised of 5 people: manager (a young up-and-comer who was transferred in when the last manager abruptly quit). 3 employees per shift, sometimes there’s overlap when they come in for shift change. 1) older, put upon person who feels they should’ve been promoted (they weren’t bc they clearly are NOT a good manager! but you really can’t tell them that); 2) 20-something coffee snob who would rather be doing Real Coffee Work but has settled for a barista job; 3) roommate of the coffee snob who actually doesn’t drink coffee and actively discourages ppl from buying it, 4) young person working afterschool and weekends, enthusiastic and bubbly; 5) college student who seems to be constantly changing majors-- very overtly Weird in a performative way. 

The rest is behind a cut because I really went for it! 

I would want it cast genderblind, basically, but with an eye toward a cast that had cis and trans women and men of different races-- essentially what it looks like when you actually go into a lot of chain coffee shops, especially in cities. 

The manager seems to love corporate but actually feels dragged into it-- their relative is one of the higher ups and expects manager to make the place succeed no matter what. What the manager actually wants is to escape the corporate life, but they feel trapped initially and (after s1) personally invested in the shop. Their arc is coming to a place of being able to shift into doing what they want to without regret-- they’d rather teach, and figure out a way to go to school and eventually do that instead. 

Older employee is gay and not out at work, fearing corporate retribution. A couple other employees learn they’re gay and support them without outing them. Their arc is coming to a place of trusting themselves and stepping back from needing so much control. They actually end up taking over for the manager. 

Coffee snob actually is a coffee snob, but figures out that maybe they also like the people aspect of things too? Ends up connecting with the unhoused person and they work together on a lot of personal issues with addiction that have hurt them in different ways. Their arc is figuring out how to let go of the need to be impressive and actually listen. 

Roommate goes through a lot of phases and causes throughout the show, seemingly a ‘flavor of the week’ activist until they find the thing they truly care about and actually turn out to have a laser focus on it. They spend a lot of time trying to figure out the mysterious customer’s job. In the end it’s related to what they want to do and the two of them end up helping one another (possible romance) 

Young person is actually working to support their family, and beneath their bubbly exterior is a lot of emotion and fear. They are one of the ppl who learns about the older gay employee. Throughout the show they learn when and how to ask for help and to not always keep up that happy mask when things are hard. They end up being recommended for a job with corporate that gives them a much higher salary and makes supporting their family a lot easier. 

Person constantly changing majors/the quirky one observes the college student and often encourages them to seek out “The Truth” until it’s revealed that the student is a single parent and school is very much career driven for them. Quirky ends up helping out with childcare during an emergency, and really bonds with the kid, who’s also kinda quirky. Possible romance with the single parent. Quirky is still a weirdo, but they’re a responsible weirdo who ended up letting go of the safety blanket that was their constantly shifting major. 

Thirty minute episodes with seasonal arcs as well as the longterm character arcs and single ep plots. A little soapy, sometimes, but not overly so. 

Is anyone still reading? I went OFF, soz. 

[i-am-the-balancing-point]

1, 10, 17 for fun facts on the oc asks? pls 💖

Thank you!! 💖 Those fun facts were, in fact, really really fun to come up with! :3

answer under the cut again bc these got long (but that always means I've been enjoying myself)

FUN FACTS

1. Which tropes do they fit? Which archetypes?

I have to admit that my general knowledge of tropes and archetypes is still in need of improvement so I used this website, this one, and tvtropes.org for some help. :3

Chronic Hero Syndrome: The hero can't resist helping out anyone and everyone in need who they may come across.

The Paladin: They combat the forces of evil wherever they are found, and defend the helpless as much as possible.

Survivor: One who somehow survives, even against insurmountable odds. Never gives up and always pulls through.

Work Hard, Play Hard: A character who is serious and hard working at their job, but loves to party and have fun when at home.

Cuddle Bug: Character who enjoys giving hugs.

Action Girl: A female badass who is tough and kicks butt. Damsel in Distress? Not her (most of the time).

Insists on Paying: A character who, even when offered a freebie, insists on using their money to pay for it.

Jack-of-All-Trades: A character with all the basic skills and is able to do a little bit of everything. [Gigi is absolutely guilty of that. Blame it on the ADHD tho. But she can teach you how to knot intricate bracelets so everyone's winning!]

The Genki Girl: A character possessed of an over-abundance of energy. She lives her life full-throttle. [I am not familiar at all with this trope but it sounded fitting. Please correct me if I particularly misinterpreted this one though!]

OOC Is Serious Business: If a character is behaving outside his usual characterization, the situation must be serious. [This bitch is so annoying and her only coping mechanisms are humor and getting drunk so when she gets real silent when confronted with John you know shit is real and she is shitting her pants.]

The Temptress: A beautiful woman who seduces the hero. [Maybe not seducing the hero... but literally everyone in her close proximity lol.]

Characterization Marches On: Character's personality is different in later episodes than they were in the beginning.

Write Who You Know: A character is based off a Real Life person the author knows or knew. [It's me :3]

Caretaker: The character who insists on taking care of others before themselves.

Empath: An archetype that feels the pain of others deeply and wants to help.

Gifted Child: A child with extraordinary talents, whether natural or supernatural, often a saviour for the story. [Again, blame the ADHD.]

Girl-Next-Door: Wholesome girl who is pretty.

Hardworker: A person who is willing to work long, hard hours for the betterment of themselves.

Hedonist: One whose life goal is the pursuit of pleasure. [This woman fucks. It's what she's known for.]

Masochist: A character that keeps engaging in a situation that leads to their pain and suffering. They’re often a visionary who regards their toil as necessary for their cause.

Mr. Fix It: That one guy who insists he can fix anything, whether physical or emotional. [She does not exactly insist but feels obligated to. Whatever it is, she will do her best to make it right.]

Prey: A victim of the predator. [You are meat much?]

Student: Person who is always trying to learn new things in the context of school or life.

Vigilante: This character takes justice into their own hands.

10. What songs remind you of them?

Demons by Sleigh Bells

You're gonna pay for it They will purify block by block by block

[...]

I wanna know Which way will the heavenly go

[...]

Demons Live on And when I die, hang me high

pls listen to them I have been obsessed ever since playing Lillipop Chainsaw (on another note: I still wanna cosplay Juliet lol) also pls listen to Pussy Riot, they're so good!

17. If you had to choose one tarot card to represent them, which would it be?

once again, my knowledge on this topic is not very broad (I also do not really "believe" in tarot cards other than liking their aesthetic) so I tarot.com for some more info

"Let your light shine. Be confident in the sacred power of your original nature."

"The Sun Tarot card radiates with optimism and positivity." [source]

[podtherapy]

The Scandal of the Mental Health Profession - A Therapist Blows the Whistle

Dr. Jim’s Instagram Live video for this talk

Dr. Jim’s Patreon Audio for this talk

Outline: 

The Cost of Entry

1. The Average Registered Nurse (RN

School for 4 years

Clinical Internship for 8 mo, done in school

Complete national Exam

Avg Income, $80K (Bur Labor Stats)

By 22 years old, have $50K student debt making $80K

Still a shortage of nurses

2. The Average Licensed Therapist

4 year Bachelor in Psych/Human

Clinical Masters Degree, 66 credits, 2 classes a semester, 3.5 years avg

Post Graduate complete 2-3 years of Clinical Internship, lucky to earn $30-40K annually during these years

Learners Permit Years (Clinical Internship). Must pay $150/week, $600/mo in supervision costs minimum, can be and additional credit cards $20K+ in debt over 3 years

Pay hundreds in National Examination prep and fees, complete this. 

Finally become an Independent Clinician, make on Avg $50K (Bur Labor Stats)

By 28 year old, have $75-100K in debt ($750/mo payments), $20-30K credit card debt from supervision, making $50K Salary

The Cost of Biz

1. Avg Insurance Company

Takes 6 mo to 2 years to be enrolled as an in-network provider

Finally enrolled as provider, reimbursement is $40-70/hour

Insurance company can “claw back” any amount of money paid AT ANY TIME because they have determined that (a) The patient wasn’t covered properly even though they said they were (b) They don’t think the patient needed care at that time (c) They have decided Provider didn’t do good enough work.

Rejected bc Insurance has “enough providers in the area”

Rejected by or delayed by “Managed Care Organizations” which exist to narrow the gate the minimize cost while technically providing care

Meanwhile, student loans, office rent, malpractice insurance, and life bills must be paid

Full caseload is 20 sessions/week, $800/week ($40K/year)

Pay is delayed 4-8 weeks on avg

Need a Biller to collect your money so you can work, cost 10% per session

Must have hour Pre-Authorization convo for each patient, another convo for continued authorization ever 6 sessions, tell patient’s secrets to a non-therapist, not paid for this work

2. Work for an Agency

They get compensated poorly, so they pay poorly, usu $40-50K. Work you like a dog, 25-30 sessions weekly to make a profit.

3. Work for yourself (Out of Network)

Charge patients directly out of pocket for care

Have to be good, survive on reputation

Many therapists charge $120-200 because they must compensate for (a) sliding scales, (b) unpredictable work (c) cost of biz is high

I charge 100 and work 6 days a week, 10 hours a day. My market rate should be 200.

4. Leave the Profession (most do this)

Get married, do therapy part time. 70% of field are women

Teach yoga, courses at college, or get job in another industry

Most therapists I know don't do therapy, very few will ever reach the 10K hours of experience we associate with expertise in a discipline.

Why Doesn't this get better?

We cannot talk about it, we have to protect the dynamic, no other healthcare provider has to do this.

We are too small, too poor to sue Insurances or lobby the government

The Gov doesn’t audit or punish Insurances for violating MH Parity Act

Employers who buy Insurance are told MH options exist but don't have ability to vet wait times or size of network. Many no longer see Insurance members but network keeps them on rolls to (1) boost appearance numbers and (2) deny provider applications because "plenty of providers in the area"

What are the results of the above?

Gig economy, Better Help, Talk Space, race to the bottom of lowest quality highest quantity to meet the need. In exchange for working from home and steady income, therapists get paid $25/session and work 30-40 sessions a week to avg $50K, still not sustainable.

MH epidemic: Surgeon General issued rare report on teen MH, Opioid Epidemic is now number 1 killer, Suicide and Substance Abuse all time highs

60% of therapists stay at a job for less than 2 years (Zippia)

The scandal of the mental health profession is that there is no mental health profession.

A healthcare discipline where few can afford to practice it full time

Where few afford to earn the 10K hours of expertise

Would you feel comfortable if a surgeon pulled up to your hospital with a pizza delivery sign on their car? What if your child's pediatrician moon lighted as a Realtor and constantly asked if you or your friends are thinking of buying a house?

A skilled profession exists when skilled professionals can perform their skill exclusively. In America, we don't have that for Mental Health, so we do not have a Mental Health Profession.

How could we make this better? Three Free Options:

1. This month: President Biden issues an order to forgive all student loans held by licensed mental health providers as recommended by the state they practice in. Overnight thousands of therapists could afford to practice just as things are. 

2. This year: Enforce the Mental Health Parity Act, don’t let insurances form Managed Care Organizations or sub contract mental healthcare to further narrow the gate, make it expensive to not provide mental health care.

3. This election cycle: Pass a “Any Willing Provider” law in your state, include language that requires minimal paperwork and bans pre-authorizations and continuing authorization. Allows each state to consider therapists in good standing, who are practicing, and relieve their burden.

[instablamwriter]

TenTaiYuki Domestic HCs

the apartment is ofc purchased by tenma

they all sleep in the ame room but each has a room dedicated to their interests

tenma’s room has a lot of gardening equipment and books. It also has his large closet of clothes and stores all the random things he gets from his jobs like from sponsors, etc++

tenma has a small garden on the roof for his bonsai

he had initially thought of just getting a penthouse apartment for them but yuki told him they shouldn’t do any needless spending (“this hack really doesn’t know how to handle money smh”)

yuki’s room is a sewing workshop. It has several mannequins, as well as fabrics stored neatly into rolls. He has a bunch of checklists everywhere to help him keep inventory and has 2 sewing machines (one that Taichi usually operates)

he also has a large corkboard full of his designs with lots of pins and random cut-outs that give him inspiration

Taichi’s room is where they store a lot of their more intimate things like their photo-albums, their theatre posters, etc.

Taichi has a large bookshelf for all his magazines and theatre scripts, etc

there’s one wall where he keeps all his skate gear and yoyos

bc of muku, he’s also started collecting a bunch of shoujo manga

there’s a big collage on one of the walls with pictures, mostly from omi and kazu

their living room has a large tv where they watch variety shows/tenma’s dramas in their spare time; they also watch shows where the celebrities are handled by azami unless azami tells them not to

they all eventually learned to cook from omi - meaning yuki cooks and the other two do the grunt work

they also learned how to mix in veggies in a way so that tenma wouldn’t be so bothered with them

tenma is still a popular actor who’s even acted in foreign films but he tries to stay in japan so that he doesn’t have to stay away from the two for too long

yuki has opened his own boutique; at first people thought he was getting buzz because tenma sumeragi was set to model his clothes but yuki boldly stated that he can get a different model and his clothes would still stand out (king shit)

he uses taichi and muku to show off his clothes and everyone started praising especially how he has such flexibility in making casual clothes to high fashion to all sorts of costumes used for the stage

tenma finally got to model his boyfriend’s clothes in magazines and let yuki earn a lot of mint

taichi acts in different theatres and also teaches acting, especially for those who are doing stage adaptations of already existing media (like kniroun)

he has a fanclub of students because of course he would >)

his hair gets totally dyed now because his boyfriends learned how to make it work

sometimes they’re all just on the couch and curl up with one another

when they’re spooning, tenma is the smallest spoon while yuki is the biggest spoon

when one of them has nightmares (usually tenma), they each hug tenma from either side and hold one of his hands while trying to sing soothing songs to calm him down

it doesn’t always work but tenma appreciates the effort each time

they all tend to overwork themselves (tenma with his schedules, yuki with nonstop work on his clothes, taichi with his practices) so when one of them notices the other is tired, they immediately make them go on break - no excuses

taichi and tenma both try to help yuki since they’re familiar with clothesmaking by now; usually taichi is the one who heads this

yuki is in contact with Igawa and makes sure that Tenma isn’t taking up too much

taichi would be the one to often make either of them take a break to go eat somewhere or try something

sometimes they just stay at home and play board/card games or video call with their friends

taichi’s siblings sometimes comes by to play with them

they ask taichi how he got such pretty boyfriends and what his secrets are

they really wanna brag to all their friends about their brother’s bfs but due to possible scandal, they don’t

they’re very happy boyfriends, that’s all I can say

[caroloftheshells]

i’m figuratively owed free therapy and/or damages by these people, and i am literally owed commission money by some other people, but the thought of ever speaking to them again. you know. i mean the commission money is whatever but everything else...... i’m finally seeing some other grad students and talking to them in person for the first time in a year and a half and, well, clearly i am not the only one who was deeply disturbed by this, or who had second or third or fourth thoughts. i mean just the idea of aligning yourself with these people, right? people thinking they can get away with murder being “beyond” the imperial slime of notation or tonality or what have you, being progressive or enlightened but at the end of the day being unable to hack away at the interpersonal rot, the neoliberal getting-ahead, or the institutional silence and be human beings to one another (to young people, to colleagues, etc). i had such low expectations bc my undergrad was repression inc despite being like nominally also progressive and (even more) diverse etc, total cesspool of sexual abuse where i also had incredible musical experiences and met some of the best and worst people of my life, right? so i thought it was nice that yk here people with some level of authority were ~having conversations~ and ~hearing people out~ and going ~we see you, you’re valid~ and such, even if the efforts for real change fell through, bc it was a step up from the bizarre fucking disconnect you got back home (“home” is a loose term but it still feels like home whenever i visit friends there). 

but now. i mean the danger is now i have standards! i mean the weirdest fucking cocktail of emotions, right, upon teaching a class and another class and another class full of freshmen and how extremely laughably easy it is to just have discussions, listen & interact, write up your lesson plans, & be good to people. yk? not like i am a saint or a therapist or the best at my job ever, but you don’t have to be. it is not THAT hard and i love to do it, and figuring that out was like..... i mean i can’t even describe how horrific. there wasn’t some trick. there wasn’t another different person who emerged; there wasn’t a teaching-self; there wasn’t the kind of wise “figure” people talk and read about and fictionalize. and for these people, yk, they are people, all the time, which i knew all along but. it’s just the immense damage people can do i guess. and now seeing other students still mad, seeing them want to hold these people’s feet to the fire or else quit, seeing them refuse to forget about it or let it blow over, doesn’t surprise me at all, but it is really strange to experience that sense that like finally a collective or at least a loose cohort of people are coming to the same conclusions that i thought were surely contained to me, or to somebody with my history, or making those same decisions & judgments that i assumed had been motivated by my own ~personal damage~ and ~mental health~ and so forth. not being alone per se on this one is, i think, just as unsettling as it is “validating” here, bc it’s one thing if it comes for me but if it comes for the people i love then that’s a different thing.

[ih8paris]

i hate paris

Do people still use tumblr? I’m so old. And I never used it. I don’t keep up with the times. I don’t give a shit. You know what? It all passes. Except facebook. They made a deal with the devil and really, was it worth it? I use facebook. I live in Paris and there are these groups for women, expats, cheap people like me that want free yoga. That’s what I use it for. And news. BBC CNN ABC NBC MSNBC, you get it and the posts. They report what the people supposedly want, but then we can see what the people are actually saying. Donald Trump won’t win? Look at voices talking? Look at the little people. It looked like he was going to win. What do you know, he did. But what if he had lost. What if Hilary didn’t get a handle on COVID and then Donald won in 2020? We would all be so fucked right now. Maybe we already are. Anyway, I’m not here to talk politics. I’m here to process my life choices and see if there were signs that I was making HUGE mistake. 

So here’s the thing. I’m a bit untraditional. Growing up was shit. Chuck left and made sure to shit all over everything before he did. And the whole get married in your 20′s have babies get divorced get remarried have more kids bc hey you’re not old at 30 and this is the guy you actually wanted to have kids with. I rant but you get it. Traditional not for me. Also not traditional, i have some money. This money has paid for college, pastry school and yes this wonderful covid filled experience in paris: the city that hates me. I’m fortunate. I don’t live lavishly. It’s not that much money. I grew up poor, I pinch pennies. Then i do exciting things. Or maybe challenging things? I am fortunate and grateful. And guilt filled. I am given this gift and shit it away, trying make something out of this paris experience. It’s like a bad relationship where i keep begging to give it one more change. It will get better. I’m a fucking idiot. So here I am, you know third times the charm, right? Back in paris. Vaccinated. I’ve made connections with people. I feel confident that this will not be a waste. It will be fun. It will be educational. I will network. Gain experiences. Omg learn so much. Be able to travel. OH the hopes and delusions i had. But maybe we should start from the beginning. 

Omg, which beginning. Paris, i guess, we can go back further when the moment calls. So 30 is approaching. I’ve moved back home. That’s story for another time. Remember my life is not traditional. So I’m home to help out and idk try to figure out what the fuck i want to do with my life. See the big mistake i made in my 20s was listening to people i don’t admire. i graduate with an art degree. my college exit interview said i am qualified to work at a bank or Kraft foods. no connects, recommendations. No direct. And my family keeps talking about getting a job, benefits, 401k. At one point a little later on, my grandpa was pushing for me to go into service. Sorry gramps, they don’t want me. My education was good. I learned a lot. They had good resources and a lot. But then nothings. So i worked at a bakery. I worked hard at this bakery. For more than a few months i worked 7 days a week. I didn’t have a life. i had money. Money i made. And apparently that was the most important thing, from the talks i keep getting from my family. And of course i wasn’t earning enough, so needed to work harder and climb the ladder. There is no ladder in a bakery. Whatever, I rant again. We’ll come back to this. 

So 30. It’s looming. I’ve thought about grad school. The money I mentioned earlier. It’s had time to grow. The GRE expires after 5 years, not that i took it but 7 years after I graduated, i wasn’t taking it. So Europe. Europe is artsy. I would like to make good money, enjoy the work okay, but mostly make good money with the least amount of actual work. So teaching. My mom teaches. Computer programing. She’s the head of the department. She fucking hates it. The dude that was suppose to get that job, he died. It was sad. But they also didn’t replace him so when the other guy retired, it became her job. It was an unpleasant 10ish years. But again, I digress. So teaching. Work hard and play hard. And it’s always changing - ish. I guess as much as you want, or don’t. New students every 15 weeks. breaks at all the holidays. Summers off. And when you’re just about to get bored, you’re back at work. Maybe because this is the only lifestyle i know, but it doesn’t sound bad. I worked in an office of women in high school. That i for sure knew i never wanted. But teaching. College. Okay. I need a masters. Learn about MA and MFA. Start looking for jobs in Cali because life’s too short to fucking deal with the snow and mosquitos. Idk everyone doesn’t live in Cali. So now the plan is MFA. They are much more rare and more in demand at universities. More money - but this time i think chasing the money necessary bc Calif = expensive. Now back to looking in Europe. I love Italy. I would love to live in in Italy for more that just a semester but actually live Italian or close to it. The language makes sense. The people make sense. The art makes sense. And it’s omg gorgeous. Alas, no American accredited MFA programs I could qualify for in Italy. I don’t know if there were none but if there were, they would have been in textiles, or digital/graphic design. Which I don’t know anything about. I’m old school, metal work, drawing, printmaking - although so far we haven’t gotten along, another thing i going to try to make work before i leave this city that hates me, for good - painting, ceramics, you get it. I hate computers. I appreciate technology but my mom teaches computers therefore there was never a working computer in my house so we (my brothers and me) don’t do computers. So i find this school - in english and in Paris. Paris, so glamorous. Home of famous artists and their art. The Louvre and Eiffel Tower and Fashion. So okay, i check out their programs. One i have no fucking clue what it is. Still don’t. Another is Photography - pass. Graphics - no. List continues. Then i see Drawing. That’s interesting. I can draw, i draw well. This is a program i could probably get into. SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT: you can get into any program. No program is ever full. It’s bull shit. Masters program. Undergrad = everyone is applying at the same time. Masters = ages range and much fewer people go. So don’t fall for that shit - EVER. 

They have a one year and two year program. The second year is less than half the first year so makes sense to go the second year and get the MFA vs MA. So that works out. I’m reading and checking it out. Not sure what I’m looking for but in hindsight, i knew something was missing. Talk it over with my mom and her peers who are also teachers. Consensus - don’t be part of the first group. So i have an interview to get it - what a joke. It is also a time for me to learn more about the program. So i ask, is this new? How long has it been around. Answer: Oh no, it’s been working several years. Very confident. I didn’t have a follow-up, just said I don’t want to be in the first group. I said those words. Her response: Oh no no don’t worry. I was so naive. And yes this continued through the whole program. People’s personalities are what they are. So she lied to get me into the program and just kept lying. No respect for the insane about of money i was paying for this ‘experience’. No respect for the education i could have gotten somewhere else. Because this program had NO educational value. I’m not being bitter or dramatic. It was a complete waste of time and money. Then covid happened. Might have been a blessing in disguise. I can go into detail of the program later. This is just an overview of the beginning. 

So, I get accepted. What a surprise. I’m now officially 30 and this - i feel- is my last hoorah. After this i will be an adult who can get an adult job and become an adult. But first i need housing. And a visa. Which is very confusing. So the French and Italians - Italians I am familiar  with, tell you about it later. So they’re similar in that lazy, lack of thoroughness, that’s their thing. Difference being Italians own it, French hardcore deny. So I’m reading this paperwork and it says thing like you need to have all your documents before your visa appointment including plane ticket. Well I can’t go without the visa so why would i get a plane ticket? Cart before the horse shit - it’s very french, wait until you hear about banks.  

[theheroichydrangea]

answer away: 3 (i'm biased), 4 (relevant to your paper lol), 23(also relevant), 42(it's whining corner time), 44?

Also a long one lol

3) What instrument would you like to learn to play and why? Why haven't you? I’ve always thought french horns are really pretty and have a nice sound but i never learned to play bc in middle school when they had you like try out all the instruments i couldn’t make a sound on the brass mouthpiece 

4) List five of your favourite recipes, share them if you like! okay i’m not going to track down links to share them, but feel free to message me if you want a link 1) a lemony soup w/chickpeas, orzo, and dill 2) gnocchi with leeks and tomatoes 3) cheesey broccoli chicken and rice skillet 4) making hot and sour soup from scratch and 5) the nestle tollhouse chocolate chip cookie recipe w/o the chocolate 

23) Comfort food? frozen pizza, creamed chipped beef on toast, and the above cheesey chicken rice and broccoli recipe 

42) Rant about something? the default for all GA (graduate assistant- can be for teaching or research) stipends should be 12 months rather than 9 months (even if its the same net amount of pay). given that grad students are expected to relocate and not work other jobs during the semester, i think it’s only fair they get paid for the full year, especially since many grad students are expected to do work like course prep over the summer- it’s one of the things that keeps grad programs inaccessible to anyone who doesn’t already have money 

44) Any questions for the asker? what is your favorite and least favorite book that was assigned in an english class?