#because he knows that if i miss one single ingredient i won't do it

[tenrose]

My therapist give me "homeworks" and it seems so complicated and emotionally draining on a paper but he told me that my own avoiding mechanisms are in fact worse and more complicated I just don't realize...

[amomentsescape]

Hey, do you have any slasher X reader where the reader loves baking?

Slashers with Reader That Loves Baking

Slashers x Reader (Separate)

Includes: Freddy, Michael, Jason, Thomas, Bubba, Brahms, Norman, Billy, & Stu

A/N: Hmm... I don't think I do. Looks like I need to whip up another fic. Here you go!

Freddy Krueger

Although Freddy doesn't need to eat, he'll try anything you make him!

He's happy that you have a hobby that you enjoy during the day

He's even happier that he gets to taste the results

Whenever you visit him, he makes sure the dream world has a kitchen for you in case you want to make something while you're there

You're more inclined to bake there anyways because Freddy can get you just about any ingredient your heart desires

When you do make items, Freddy switches into his "Kiss the Cook" apron and matching hat

He may not help you with the baking, but he still expects kisses while you work

He'll stand beside you, just observing everything you do

He doesn't ask too many questions either, he just likes seeing you relaxed

Once the treats are ready, he literally stabs a few onto his knifed glove and eats them off of it

There hasn't been a single thing you've made that he hasn't enjoyed

Michael Myers

Michael is pretty neutral with your enjoyment of baking

He tends to his hobbies, you tend to yours

He doesn't feel like there needs to be any crossover of sorts

However, he won't deny you when you ask him to try things

And if you need help accessing the top shelf, he'll help you out

He secretly has a big sweet tooth, and your warm smile influences him to try everything (he'd be dead before he admitted it though)

He has a pretty basic taste in sweets too

He enjoys the majority of the cookies, cakes, and breads you've made

He isn't a big fan of pie or dried fruits though

If you make a batch of anything, he'll try a bite if you ask, but that'll be it

You're always certain he's just trying to be polite

But whenever you wake up in the morning, half the tray is gone

Michael will just shrug it off of course

But it's pretty obvious he enjoys your treats

Jason Voorhees

He absolutely loves that you bake!

To be fair, he'd love literally anything you do that makes you happy, but baking reminds him a lot of his missed childhood

You've made a couple things already that reminded him of stuff his mother used to make, and it almost brought him to tears

He doesn't really get sweet cravings like he did when he was younger, but he will never say no to trying something of yours

He also enjoys decorating some of the treats too

His large hands tend to fumble a bit, and nothing comes out as good as yours, but he's having fun, and that's what matters most to you both

His favorite thing is coming home after a long day to the smell of baked goods and to see you casually mixing ingredients together

You just seem so content, and it gives him a taste of what domestic life is like with you

He'll always come over to greet you with a hug, not caring if you're covered in flour

And once he's gotten cleaned up, he just sits at the table out of the way, watching you

He especially loves when you talk to him while baking

It just makes him all warm inside

Thomas Hewitt

He never really grew up with home baked goods like yours before, so it feels like literal heaven when he smells the sugar in the air

He likes walking up and peering over your shoulder, trying to see what you're doing

He also just likes hanging out with you in case you need help with anything

If your arms ever get tired from mixing or kneading, you know who to ask

If you let him, he'll take little tastes of the batters, predicting how much he's going to like them once they're done

(It's always a 10/10)

If it's sweet, he likes it

There's never been anything you've made that he didn't eat almost all of in one night

He loves if you make enough for the whole family too!

He's a bit hesitant to help decorate, and even more so to help add ingredients

But if you ask, there's no way he'd be willing to say no

Bubba Sawyer

He adores your baking!

He absolutely has no idea what you're doing half the time, but he's happy about it all the same

You've got to be careful with this one though

Because if you even turn around for a second, the batter is gone

Same goes for when the treats are cooling

If you leave the kitchen, they'll be gone within just a couple minutes

You have no idea how he manages to do it

At least he's showing you just how much he loves your bakery?

But besides that, he's a great hand to have in the kitchen

He can mix and mix for days

And he's always there to help hand you whatever you need

Just don't trust him with the powders unless you want a white, dusty kitchen

He's also not the best around the hot oven, having burnt himself a handful of times

It's kind of like having a helpful but clumsy child in the kitchen with you

But he's so sweet you can't bare to tell him to leave

Brahms Heelshire

Brahms never grew up with many sweets in the house

So having his own baker at home is like feeding a starving man

And with Brahms, you can imagine how that goes

Will come to you almost every day with a new treat he is craving

In fact, he even added to the rules list that you needed to make him a bedtime treat or else he refuses to go to sleep

You love baking of course, so it's not a problem, but some of his requests are absurd

A pie covered in chocolate ice cream smooshed with cookies and drizzled with brownie batter might be a bit much for a midnight snack

But you honestly did it to yourself

The moment he tasted your treats, there was no going back

And be careful when the sugar rush hits

He's ready to bounce off the walls with you in tow

Norman Bates

Norman has always been one for domestic hobbies

So the fact that you're a baker makes him feel so cozy and warm

Waking up to fresh muffins with his tea, coming home to a plate of brownies, and even being woken up in the middle of the night to some wild cookie recipe all makes Norman so happy

Jokingly complains that you're fattening him up

He's honestly a pretty good baker himself, although he argues that his skill is nowhere near as good as yours

But there have been a handful of times he prepare his own treat beside you in the kitchen, and it always came out amazing

And because of his experience, he's happy to give a lending hand when you need

If you're making something you know by heart instead, then he's still there beside you, keeping up with the dishes so you don't have to tend to a mess later

Norman enjoys whatever makes you happy, and is eager to learn even more about what you love too!

Billy Loomis

He's pretty chill about it at first

He thinks it's a cute hobby, but doesn't know much about it himself

However, the first time he was actually there with you watching you work and tasting what you made...

He really gained a better perspective on it

He can see the hard work and true enjoyment you put into the hobby, and this makes him appreciate it more

He's not huge on sweets, but seeing you put all of this together for him makes it impossible to deny them

Will be brutally honest if he likes something or not, but there's truly only been a couple times he actually didn't like what you made

Will occasionally sit on the counter beside you and just ask basic questions

"What does this thing do?" "How long does it need to sit there?" "Is there a difference between folding and mixing?"

You always smile at him since his genuine curiosity is cute

Plus, it shows he's trying to learn more about what you do

Will definitely stand behind you and rest his head on your shoulder while you work

Stu Macher

You love to bake? Well, Stu loves to eat

Match made in heaven in his eyes

He honestly is surprised by the amount of effort that it takes to whip up a simple cookie or cupcake

He's not usually on this end of the food process

But he honestly enjoys watching what you do

Will literally just stare and zone out, making you laugh

Loves loves loves when it's time to lick the spoon

He will dab batter onto your nose though

He's a huge fan of helping you decorate too!

Just be careful, because Stu is also a huge fan of squeezing the piping bag directly into his mouth

But surprisingly, Stu has become pretty decent at piping frosting and making your treats look pretty

He always insists on eating the ones you decorate though because they "taste better"

He honestly just loves being able to show praise for the stuff you make him and will always request a fun treat to accompany your weekly movie nights

[mywons]

❛ boyfriend!jungwon headcanons.

▸ ִֶָ tags [ boyfriend ] jungwon x reader, fluff + mentions of kissing + cute wonnie + just a happy relationship + mentions of petnames. warnings! && possible warning : very brief (2) mentions of marriage + mentions of jealousy / possessiveness. ✿ 0.6k words —

## HEADCANONS UNDER THE CUT !

won is very . . . loveable

he's super affectionate & loveydovey, he does any & everything to show how deep his love for you runs

dates with him are usually full of spontaneity. quick & fun picnics, a playful movie night with takeout

out of all of enhypen, i think jungwon is the second most type to date-to-marry (after mr. husband material park jongseong). so while he's very fun and playful, he's serious about you too

he wants you to know that he sees a future with you and if you don't see that with him, what's the point?

likes to keep polaroids of you scattered across his room's walls

collects the silliest little trinkets & souvenirs whenever the group goes someplace new, only to bring them back to you

the type of bf to text you at 3am and ask if you wanna raid the nearest corner store

kisses you very often. as a greeting, as a goodbye, as a reward, bc you look cute, he literally just loves kissing you

doesn't get jealous easily but so so so clingy when he does ,, will pull you towards him and refuse to let go

so so so so caring, smothers you with all the love in the world whenever you're feeling down :(

petnames include: lovey & pretty baby

likes to sleep with his head on your chest so that he can hear the rhythm of your heartbeat <3

definitely randomly calls you at all times of the day, just saying he misses you

^^ "i called you earlier why didn't you answer :(" "bc i'd literally just left your place" "so..????"

he's like ur MY lover u need to be attached to my hip at all times bc ur my baby !!!!!!

and he's so real for that honestly

i think he to an extent feels an overwhelming sense of protectiveness for you and because of that, he tends to overthink ab if even the smallest things he does are affecting you negatively

constantly making sure you're happy/content in your relationship, asking if there's anything else you'd like for him to do

he's just super careful with you

nd so supportive oh em gee !! if ur an idol like him, he's at every single show he can make it to. cheering you on, shouting "thats my baby 🫵"

if you're interested in smthn else/neither of you are idols, he's still definitely supporting you in whatever interest you have

constantly complimenting you and praising how your brain works. he admires everything about you

sometimes buys stuff in a bigger/smaller size so that he has an excuse to wear it and then give it to you

^^ "oh it doesn't really fit me so here you go :]" knowing damn well he just wants you to smell like him

definitely competitive when it comes to you. "oh yeah? well my lover can do this and this"

forever seeking any reasons to make you feel good about yourself

likes when you play with his hair after a long day or even sing to him, ironically.

really just enjoys the sound of your voice

would love to adopt a bunch of cats and grow old with you <3

never is the one to end any contact with you first. oh you guys are on the phone? better hang up first bc he isn't. won't even pull from a hug first, and would run out of oxygen if it meant keeping his lips on yours instead of resorting to pulling away

sees himself marrying you has thought about it plenty of times and voiced his ideas for the wedding, resulting in teasing from the members

eats ingredients out of your food that he knows you don't enjoy so you won't have to pick the pieces out !!

likes being called honey

need him to be my boyfriend immediately

mywons © 2023 ## please do not plagiarize my works.

[nicoline1998enilocin]

Bucky's sweet treats | Part 2

PAIRING | Bucky Barnes x Female!Reader

WORD COUNT | 2K

SUMMARY | Both you and Bucky have been getting into the habit of leaving and finding baked goods at the end of his missions, but he decided he would like to help in the kitchen. He's not much of a chef, so it won't be as innocent and easy as you may have thought it to be.

WARNING(S) | This is your official trigger warning. Do not proceed if any of these topics upset you. Smut [ fingering, oral (f receiving), protected sex, squirting, dirty talk, aftercare ], swearing. It's just porn with a little bit of a plot.

A/N | Surprise! Since most of you seem to love Part I of this story, I've decided to write a second part, which will be a lot more steamy than the first. Enjoy! 😉

Likes and reblogs will be very much appreciated 💜

Main Masterlist | Bucky Barnes Masterlist

Ever since that kiss in the gym after you left him the peanut butter cookies, the two of you couldn't get enough of each other. It wasn't just in the bedroom either, because the two of you absolutely loved every single session of sex you would have in there. But the touches, longing glances, lingering hugs, nothing would be enough for each other. You couldn't be close enough to one another, so when Bucky asked if maybe the two of you could bake something together at one point, you didn't hesitate to tell him how much you'd want that.

''And what would you like to bake then? Since you'll be helping me, I'll let you choose,'' you say with a wink, getting ready to get the supplies you'll need to make it. ''How about... those peanut butter brownies you've been wanting to try?'' he said with a devilish smirk on his face, and that is when you realized this wasn't going to be as easy as you'd imagined it to be. ''Okay, but no funny business! You know how serious I am about my brownies!'' you say to him with a stern look, and it just makes him laugh.

''Oh, I wouldn't dream of it doll,'' he said throwing his hands up in the air, but you knew him all too well for you to believe him. And in all honesty, you didn't really mind the distraction of him inside the kitchen with you. So, the next day both you and Bucky went to the grocery store to get some of the missing ingredients, his hand never leaving the small of your back as to show a little bit of his possessive side. You absolutely went crazy for it though, you love it when Bucky shows everyone you're his, and sometimes even give him a kiss or 2 to show everyone he's yours.

''Is this everything, doll?'' Bucky asks as you put a bag of chocolate chips in your shopping basket. ''I believe so, yeah. Let's go back and make some brownies, shall we?'' you asked him and he happily agreed, almost dragging you to the checkout so the two of you could go home faster. He insisted on paying for the groceries even though you said that wasn't necessary, but he said it was his idea so he should pay, so you agreed. When you were done you walked to the car and before you could even open the car door to sit down, Bucky pinned you to the side of the car.

''Buck, what are-'' is all you could get out before he kissed you, immediately asking for access with his tongue, and you happily grant him what he's asking for. The two of you deepen the kiss immediately, not caring about anyone who can see the two of you in the parking lot. Only when someone tells the two of you to get out of here, do you break apart and smile at each other. ''Damn, I couldn't wait any longer to kiss you doll, you look so damn sexy today,'' he said giving you a short kiss before moving to open your car door for you. You slip in and Bucky gives a slap on your ass before you sit down, earning him a little squeal from you.

''Bucky, behave!'' you said when you sat down, but the look on his face showed you he wasn't exactly planning on behaving himself, the mischief practically dripping off of it. When he sat down on the driver's side of the car, you could see that he was starting to get hard from your kiss earlier, and you would be lying if you said you weren't absolutely soaked right now. But you couldn't give in to him, not when driving, you didn't want to get into an accident after all. Bucky put his hand on your thigh and started rubbing soft circles with his thumb, making you melt under his touch.

When you arrive back at the Compound, you have to keep yourself in check and not drag him to your bedroom to fuck him senseless right then and there, you would be doing that later. First, there would be brownies to bake, and you were happy you could get your mind off of Bucky for a little while. Except, you forgot he would be helping you. You walked towards the oven to preheat it, and when you were bending over, you suddenly felt Bucky behind you, one hand giving you a slap on your ass and the other holding you steady at your hip so you wouldn't fall forward. ''Bucky!'' you hissed at him, ''Somebody might see us!'' but he didn't react, he knew everyone was away for a mission, so the two of you had the entire Compound to yourselves.

He sank to his knees and grabbed both your ass cheeks in his hands, kneading them softly while he enjoys every last whine and soft moan coming from your mouth when he does this. He shifts a bit more forward and turns you around, so your back is turned to the counter, and he starts moving his hands over your thighs and up to the button of your jeans. ''Let's see how soaking wet you are for me doll,'' he says and unbuttons your pants quickly, pulling the zipper down and then pulling down your pants completely, letting you step out of them before throwing them to the side. He lets out a hum of appreciation when he finds out you're dripping with arousal for him.

His fingers glide over the thing fabric of your thong, but it doesn't take much for him to rip it off and throw it to the side and attach his lips to your throbbing clit, finally giving you the sensation you've been yearning for from him. He starts licking a few broad stripes through your folds and one of your hands attaches to his hair, while the other is holding onto the counter to ground yourself a little. When he lifts up one of your legs give him even better access to your dripping pussy, you let out a deep moan of his name, the fact that anyone can walk in and see you like this only makes you feel hotter. ''Oh Bucky, f-fuck...'' you moan as he starts fucking you with this tongue.

You're getting closer to your orgasm and your legs start to tremble. ''Gonna cum, please...'' you tell him and Bucky lets out a groan at this, which vibrates through your entire body. ''Such a good girl for me, all dripping like this... Gonna cum for me doll? Gonna cum all over my face?'' he asks and he pushes two fingers inside you in a steady motion and works your clit with his tongue. ''FUUUCK fuckfuckfuck,'' is all you can say as he keeps going and your orgasm washes over you. Bucky keeps working you through it and your juices start spilling out, coating Bucky's face and when you come back down to earth a little bit, you realize you just squirted all over him, making your face go a deep red, you've never done that before.

''I- I'm sorry, Buck,'' you say softly as you put your leg back on the ground, allowing Bucky to get up. ''Oh no, never be sorry about that doll, that was amazing,'' he said before kissing you, making you taste every last drop of yourself he licked off of you. You moan into his mouth and he takes the opportunity to slip his tongue in your mouth again. His hips slowly start rolling against your pelvis and you feel how hard he was now. Your hands trail down to his pants and you feel how thick and hard he is right now. ''Oh no doll, right now is all about you, my turn will be later. Right now I want to fuck you so bad,'' he said and takes off your shirt, exposing your lacy bra which he also rips off without any regard for the piece of fabric.

He quickly gets undressed too and he starts stroking himself up and down, before walking back to his pants and grabbing a condom out of his pocket, he thought ahead and had put a few in there just to be sure. He lifts you up on the counter so you're the perfect height for Bucky to fuck you, and he strokes his hard length again, getting it ready to put on the condom. He rips the packet open with his mouth and you bite on your lip, loving the sight in front of you. ''I need you so bad, Bucky, need you to fuck me so deep I can't walk for days,'' you beg him and as soon as he rolled the condom on his length, he starts teasing your pussy by running it through the folds and gathering some of the wetness.

''Oh yeah? You need me to fuck you, doll? Need me to rail you so hard right here you won't be able to think? 'm gonna fuck you so hard you can't think of anything other than my thick cock in that tight little pussy of yours,'' he says and he lines himself up at your entrance, slowly inching in. When he's almost all the way in, you suddenly hear the oven turn off signifying that it's preheated, but neither of you cares at this moment, too wrapped up in one another to think about what you were originally going to do. ''Oh fuck, so big Bucky, feels so good...'' you moan into his ear and when he bottoms out, he puts soft kisses on your neck, making sure to ease the sting of his stretch a little. ''Such a perfect girl for me right now,'' Bucky said and he slowly started moving.

His hands wandered over from your hips up to your breasts, each hand taking one of the nipples in them, softly pulling on them, and squeezing a little bit. ''Oh Bucky, please...'' you say and he starts teasing you a little with some dirty talk. ''What is it that you want, doll? Need me to fuck this needy cunt of yours? Such a needy slut for me right now,'' and you throw your head back because it feels so good when he finally starts thrusting in and out of you. He keeps tugging on your nipples making you only wetter, and all that can be heard is both of your moans, and his thick cock sliding in and out of your dripping cunt at a relentless pace, constantly hitting your g-spot.

Your fingers move to your clit and start rubbing circles, making your orgasm come really close. When Bucky grabs the back of your neck and pulls you close so your moans are absorbed by his mouth, he fucks into you with an unrelenting pace and before you know it you squirt once again, Bucky keeps riding you through your orgasm and not long after his pace starts to get sloppy too. ''Oh shit doll, your cunt is squeezing me so good, such a good fucking girl for me, gonna make me cum if you keep squeezing me,'' he says and you instinctively wrap your legs around his hips, making his thrust sloppier and it doesn't take long for him to cum as well. You kiss him softly as he rides out his own orgasm, softly stroking over his shoulders and biceps. ''I think we should bake together more often...'' you say with a fucked out expression on your face, and Bucky couldn't agree more.

He picks you up and you wrap your arms and legs around him, leaving your clothes behind, you will worry about that later. He carries you to his room and runs the both of you a nice hot bath, and he sets you down slowly before stepping into it himself. You go and sit against Bucky, your back touching his chest, your head resting on his shoulder. ''I love you, Bucky,'' you say with a little smile on your lips. ''I love you too, doll,'' he said and you sat there enjoying each other's presence for a little while. When you were just about to get up out of the bath you heard Bucky's bedroom door open and your clothes hit the floor before Tony yelled ''Don't ever fuck in my kitchen again, you guys are nasty!'' and both of you couldn't help but laugh at it.

[sphireath-wisp]

Hi! Idk if this is weird to ask but can you do the monster trio + Usopp, law and shanks with a Mexican!Reader that starts to yell at them in Spanish? I think yk what i mean but other wise it’s fine <3 ty!

Sypnosis -> The ask above! I will be removing Shanks though because I have a limit of 5 people per request!!

Author's notes -> AAA MY FIRST ASK??? AND WHEN I WAS BUSY??? I'M SO HAPPY!! First off, I would like to apologize for getting to this ask super late since I was really busy for the past week and had no time to write. Thank you for your patience!! (You didn't say this was x reader, so I won't write it as such)

Warnings -> Probably inaccurate Google translations, not proofread, following EddieVR's way of speaking (I'm trying to follow an actual Spanish speaker's way and tone so that I can be as accurate as possible), vulgar language because the reader is yelling (so I assume they're upset/angry), Reader could be perceived as rude

Featuring -> Luffy, Zoro, Sanji, Ussop, Law

Luffy

You can't believe the disaster of a crew you've joined so spontaneously. With a captain that gives that poor cook a workout to feed him 3 meals a day (maybe even more than that), you feel grateful that he's the one cooking because of the delicacy and care he puts into his meals.

Though, not even the best cooks can perform magic. Without ingredients, a chef is left with nothing but utensils to serve. It gave you a shock when you realized how fast Sanji had already ran out of ingredients.

"¡Nunca duraremos en el mar contigo, idiota sin cerebro! La comida está prácticamente terminada. (We'll never last at sea with you, you brainless idiot! The food is practically finished.)" You sigh.

Luffy is... dumbfounded. He just stares at you, scratches the top of his head, then tilts his head with an innocent gleam in his eyes - oblivious to what you're sputtering. If anything, he finds it sort of amusing to see you this upset.

He's heard from the crew about the depth of your culture and home country before - boy, he misses the mouthwatering food there just thinking about it.

You shake your head, aware that your chidings aren't getting through to him. Plus, you got so upset you started scolding him in a whole different language. "Sanji! Would you limit Luffy's meals-"

And suddenly Luffy listening to you (despite the incessant complaining in between).

Zoro

"Ouchouchouch, what the hell?" Zoro grits his teeth at you after you pinched his ear, dragging him behind the crates and preventing him from attacking the marines in front of you.

"Don't just go up there! What are you thinking?" You suddenly spot flashlights illuminating the dark corner the both of you were jammed into and immediately rush over to another hiding place. Letting go of Zoro's ear, you could only pray that he had enough sense in him to follow you instead of trusting any predatory instinct he had in him.

Nami trusted you with this mission! You had to sneak in quietly and-

"It's Roronoa Zoro! Call for backup!"

Great! Another problem. Snaking your hands around him, you grab onto his shirt, smiling gently for just a moment. There weren't many options and it was only the two of you in a base full of marines - it would be waste of time to defeat them all and the injuries afterward would be nothing but troublesome.

"You know what this means, ¡corre por tu maldita vida! (run for your damn life!)" Not looking back for a single moment, you bang into almost everything blocking your way with Zoro being dragged along behind you. Luckily for you, he works as a great meatshield - fending off all the enemies that get too close for comfort!

Zoro had no idea what language you were speaking, but he could tell just how furious you were just by how much you continued to ramble while sprinting into enemy territory. Just by how you sound, he could tell that you probably weren't saying the nicest things about him...

(He'll learn from you so that he can use them against Sanji)

Sanji

Just like how he hears the tears of heartbroken women falling to the ground, he can listen to the exhausted sighs of the women on board. Every time Nami and Robin are having a hard time, Sanji makes it his first priority to help them.

Of course, his enthusiasm to assist these "poor, helpless" women are appreciated - but his tendency to go all out and beyond makes his efforts... overbearing.

"Special drinks for the two lovely Mademoiselles," Sanji's voice deepens, coaxing his words with a dash of honey in hopes of wooing Robin and Nami. The gentle clack of a cup being placed next to your hand suddenly alerts you, "And one for (Name),"

You thank him along with Nami and Robin, sipping the sweet cider-like concoction in your glass as your eyes drift back to the book in your hand.

"Is there anything else I could help you with?" You couldn't see what Sanji was doing, but you could already picture that infatuated grin on his face.

Despite the three of you already insisting that there's no need, Sanji still lingers around you. Like a moth to a fiery flame, Sanji buzzes around the two women - leaving them with no moment of peace.

"¿Puedes callarte y aprender a cerrar la boca? (Can you shut up and learn how to zip your mouth?)" You yell, slamming the book shut. You continue to scream - even Chopper and the others begin to hold you back from reaching Sanji.

"Do you get the feeling that they're mad at Sanji?" Luffy sits on a railing and ponders. "No shit, Sherlock." Zoro retorts.

Ussop

At first, when you didn't know Ussop well enough, you were unaware of his tendency to lie his way out of sticky situations. From his title as "God Ussop" alone, you would assume he's quite powerful, no?

You once overheard his boasting to those oblivious to his actual abilities. You don't think of Ussop as weak, far from it. His talent as a sniper is unlike no other and deserved to be praised. However, exaggerations would only bring in more and more trouble. Not to mention the misconceptions!

You weren't really sure whether his exceptional ability to lie was a blessing or a curse.

"I've carried a 100-ton hammer before as well!" Ussop folds his arms, holding his head up high in pride. The wows and impressed gazes from the kids only made him exaggerate more.

You sigh, leaning against the wall and wondering why pirates like you and Ussop are suddenly babysitting kids now. You ran into daycare to avoid getting spotted by marines, but the children there ended up assuming that the both of you are new caretakers,

You did nudge him a few times, reminding him about how the crew is probably waiting for the both of you the get back on the Sunny. Though, your words probably fell on deaf ears.

"Ussop! Ussop! If you and (Name) were to fight, who would win?" The question piqued your curiosity and the ends of your lips curve upwards, "Well, that would be-"

"Me, of course!" Ussop interrupts your sentence before it was finished. The kids gasp in awe as you snap your head to Ussop, glaring at him.

"(Name) must not be that good of a fighter..." You hear a soft murmur through the whispers in the crowd.

"Oye, imbécil, ¿de quién crees que estás hablando? (Hey dumbass, who do you think you're talking about?)" Grabbing a hold of the collar of Ussop's shirt, you drag him out without any explanation as he tries to talk you out of this.

"Do you think they're going to eat?" One kid asks, "Yeah, maybe they got hungry." Another replies.

Law

"You're not going to try the capirotada (Mexican bread pudding)? The rest of the crew seems to have taken a liking to it." You hum to yourself before being interrupted by a loud sigh.

"You know I don't like bread, (Name)-ya," You didn't bother to turn around and see the frown on his face, but it's fine - you were completely okay with his opinion.

"You're really not open to trying new things, huh?" You sarcastically jest, "The crew might ask me to make this again, you know. The smell of bread is going to haunt you in your sleep."

"(Name)! Seconds please!" Bepo barges in with a giant plate in his hand, "The others want more too!" Bepo rushes to your side, placing the plate on the counter for you. "Captain, you're really not going to try this... what is called again?"

"Capirotada, learn how to pronounce and drill it into your brain, then I'll make this for the crew again." Your back was still turned to the both of them, but you could still hear the soft groans from your captain.

"Capirotada! It's really good," Bepo insisted - which did bring a smile to your face. He grabbed a plate of the bread pudding, shoving it right into Law's face as Law pinched his nose.

Law took a step back, but eventually sighed and picked up a fork. "No more bread for another month after this, alright?" Law poked his fork into the pudding, sliding it around the plate as if he was reluctant to even pick it up.

Finally, he ate it.

"So? Isn't it great?" Bepo asked. Law slowly chewed the pudding, his features contorting into surprise, a bit of satisfaction, then disgust. "Yeah, I'll take that as a no." You chuckled at his expression.

"(Name), I don't think it's the bread... I think it's your cooking." Law covered his mouth, implying that he was going to vomit, hiding his laughter.

"diez, nueve, ocho... (ten, nine, eight...)" You slowly turned around. Unluckily for Law, you had happened to just buy a new set of knives recently known for their effective and quick chopping! "W-we should really go now, captain! It was really super duper nice seeing you, (Name)!"

"tres, dos, uno. Captain, ¡Espero que hayas dicho tus oraciones! (three, two, one. Captain, I hope you said your prayers!)"

[starseneyes]

Chenford REWIND- Lucy Chen / Tim Bradford - The Rookie - Season 3 Ep 09

"Amber" AKA Littering is Worth It

There's a fairly decent chunk of Chenford in this one (which sounds like an ingredient list or some kind of cat food, out of context). So, I'm excited about tackling it with y'all!

SPOILER ALERT: If you love to read something vague with few details that gives nothing away... You're in danger, here. I will be spoiling absolutely everything Chenford related in this episode, plus going back in time. I do try to write these as though I'm watching them for the first time, so there'll be little-to-no future talk.

Alright, everyone ready to dive in? Let's go.

"Is Tim gonna do anything special to memorialize your last shift together?"

Torture her. Throw her off a roof. Slip glass into her boots. I mean, that's the first place my mind went when I thought about Tim planning anything as a ceremonial "rite of passage" for Lucy.

"Not knowingly. You know, when you move on from an important relationship there are steps you should take to ensure a healthy parting."

Awwww. Our babies are in a relationship!

Look, I know they aren't exchanging knowing glances in Roll Call or doing the horizontal mambo while Kojo awkwardly pretends not to watch, yet. But, Lucy sees what they have as a relationship, not just a hierarchy, and I love that about her.

Lucy connects people. Look at Lucy, Nolan, and Jackson. Lucy is the common denominator in this OT3. And much as Tim has tried to fight it, he and Lucy have a very real connection.

No, they're not about to start ripping each other's clothes off. But they are friends. They do care about each other. They've built an incredible trust that they will need if this ever goes further.

"We are going to work through every single one of them." "How, if he doesn't know you're doing it?" "Trickery!"

I see you, Lucy Chen. Trying to manipulate and trick your boyfriend because pranks and kinda one of your love languages, the pair of you. That and competition. (And we'll hafta wait to see what else, but yowza, we can imagine).

Also, I love that she thinks he won't pick up on what she's doing. Now, we'll see later in this episode that Tim doesn't pick up on everything, but he's not a dolt.

However, I love the foreshadowing about Lucy using "trickery" with Tim. It just comes out in a way she didn't expect.

"It's our last shift together. It's crazy, huh?" "Not really." "Come on. We've been riding shoulder-to-shoulder for over a year, now." "Soon there'll be a new Rookie sitting in that seat annoying the crap out of me for 12 hours a day." "So, you're not gonna miss riding with me? At all?"

Lucy is starting the list. Tim's trying to treat it like just another day. Because, come on, he's going to miss her. We know he is. Season 3 is the era of Tim and Lucy being friends.

It's been over a year, now, of the two of them riding together. In this year, they've learned a lot about one another. Partly because Lucy talks a lot, but partly because they really do care about each other.

Tim's being "Tim" about it. Putting up a front, dismissing it, and reminding her that this is a rotating position. Right? Rookies come and go from his Shop. Nothing special about this one.

But we all know there is. Lucy has walked through the fire with Tim in ways that no other Rookie has, and he's bent the rules in ways he never would for any other Rookie.

There's something in them that wants to take care of the other, protect the other, watch out for the other. Even when they're hot-headed and losing their tempers, it's underscored by the fact that they care about each other.

This bond is not yet romantic in nature, but it is strong and it's undeniable. But even they wouldn't know what to call it if asked. It's unspoken, and that helps keep it comfortable enough for Tim to accept.

"It's a job, not Happy Hour." "Denial. Check."

How much do I love that Lucy knows Tim is denying that he will miss her? That means she knows in her heart of hearts that Tim will miss riding with her, just as she will miss riding with him.

They've become constants in one another's lives. Yes, Tim has had a rolling Shop of Rookies for years, now. But Lucy's exceptional in so many ways, and I tend to believe he's never respected a Rookie at the end of a run the way he does Lucy.

She's made of stronger stuff. And yet she's still a ball of sunshine.

Others would have lost themselves entirely in all of that. Yes, Lucy bears the scars in her heart forever. But, she never let it kill the light within her. It was only dimmed for a while.

And on the other side of her rescue, Tim was still Tim. There were times he barked at her, called her out on mistakes, and got under her skin. But every day in this Shop and outside of it has brought them closer together.

"What?" "Hmm?" "Nothing."

Nothing is never nothing, Lucy Chen! I've said this a lot, especially in my Season 5 reviews. But, I've never seen a case on this show where "nothing" actually meant "nothing".

"Do you see yourself as my mentor?" "No. I'm your TO. It's my job to make sure you're not dangerously incompetent when you hit the streets without supervision tomorrow."

This is the perfect job for Tim of this era. He puts in his time on the streets with his Rookie. He clocks out. He goes home.

And after the one time in the Service when he, in Lucy's words, "showed compassion" and someone got hurt, Tim wants to make sure nobody else makes a bad judgment call like that.

In this way, constantly training other Officers allows him to make the streets better, safer, and smarter. It's his way of dealing with his own conscience, almost.

Mentorship implies more of a relationship and less of a hierarchy. Tim and Lucy are on opposite sides of this, and I don't mind. This is part of the journey that makes them so much fun to watch—Tim and Lucy start almost at polar opposite points and find a way to stay true to who they are while gravitating toward one another.

"You know, when I was a Rookie, I couldn't wait to get off probation."

Look at Tim Bradford giving her a tiny insight into himself. Careful, your "friendship" is showing, Timmy, my boy.

But, seriously, I love how casual this little reference is into his emotional state of being on this same day in his career. Often, Lucy has to lead him into talking about the past with questions or comments. Here, he freely offers that morsel of information.

It may not seem like a lot, but back when they first started riding together, he wouldn't have bothered telling her how he felt about anything.

"Oh, I am excited. Believe me. But I also know the importance of acknowledging your loss when going through something like this." "'Acknowledging your loss?'... What is this, some 'Intro to Psych' closure BS?"

The disdain in his voice. Of course, you're gonna fall in love with this girl. It's inevitable. Just wait and see.

Because he doesn't have a lot of love for Psychology, and that was her whole major. In real life, of course, we need some mix of the two of them in our lives to keep us from spiraling out with all the facets of psychology on our own while simultaneously maintaining an open enough mind to accept help when needed.

Lucy and Tim come at things from different angles, but they're both looking for the answers, in their own way. It's best when they work together—which they've learned... for the most part.

"It's not BS. It's a widely used psychological model to help people cope with the end of a relationship." "Relationship?" "Partnership. Mentorship. Whatever you want to call it." "Look, I don't want to call it anything."

What I find supremely funny (and telling) is that much as Lucy tries not to label the romantic relationships in her life, Tim really doesn't want to label his relationship with Lucy at all.

Even the one time she got him to kinda admit they were friends, it was only because he didn't refute it. But Lucy is processing it her way.

Remember, her car was the only place she felt safe after Caleb. Touchstones and constants are as important to her as they are to him—but he doesn't look for them in his work. Lucy looks for them everywhere. That is where they differ.

But, oh, how fascinating how blurry the lines could become with these two. Even in this episode it gets... Complicated.

"It's not like you won't see me tomorrow at the station, you know? What's there to talk about?" "A lot. I have a list." "A list?"

The words have barely left his mouth when he snatches that thing and yeets it out the window where I imagine it fell into the lap of a person sitting on the curb who really needed that list to help them process the loss of their beloved cat.

What? The List could have its own fan-fiction tab on AO3, for all I know!

"You know, littering is a $250 fine." "Worth it."

My husband and I were rolling (He happened to be over my shoulder when I watched this scene).

Tim wants to avoid this so much, he's willing to do whatever—even incur a fine for an offense caught on police cameras. But Lucy knows Tim way too well.

"What are you smiling about?"

Grumpy, you have met your match in Sunshine. Lucy pulls out a backup and opens it, making me wonder if there's a third hidden somewhere... just in case.

Look at how his eyes land on the paper and his face just falls in disbelief. And Lucy is deservedly smug.

"Well, we were at denial, but now we have moved to anger. Progress."

Love them. Like, that was the only thought in my head when I saw that moment.

Not a deep analysis of how Lucy's so in-touch with Tim's state of being that she knew he'd be mad, and also that he can't even enjoy being mad because she's making that part of her bloody list... I just thought, "Love them."

"Let me guess, you think if the parents had properly worked through their separation this whole thing could have been avoided?" "No. Mom needs to get as far away from him as possible. But I do think that having easier access to counseling and mental health resources could prevent situations like this."

As a country, we really don't understand the value of mental health. I have story after story of things that have come up in my own life where I was told to delete comments about my mental health, to not share what was going on with me, and to pretend I never struggled.

As I deleted one line, I remember thinking, "This is why they always say, 'but she was so happy'". We're not allowed to be unhappy. We're not allowed to be hurt. We're not allowed to admit that we're struggling. Because we're supposed to live up to an expectation of unattainable perfection.

Lucy isn't wrong, is all I'm saying.

"Sure, but most guys still wouldn't go."

This is also true. Lucy outlines it below, but I'll say I've witnessed this in my own life. Men in my life whose families told them that therapy was either unnecessary or unhelpful because it was "weak" to see a therapist. Let me tell you, I have seen men's lives change via therapy. But we have to stop the stigma for it to have wider reach.

"Yeah, because we stigmatize mental health, treat it as less important than physical health. It's ridiculous that they teach sex ed in schools, but not how to be in a relationship."

Eh, I had a lot of folks telling me how to be in a relationship growing up that absolutely didn't pan out. I've got stories, folks.

But, I hear her on the fact that mental health isn't taught when sex ed is. And sex ed in school is rubbish, too. At least, it was at my school in the Bible Belt.

"I wish someone taught me how to be in this one."

Timothy Bradford! Did you just admit that you and Lucy are in a relationship?! EEE!

Look, we all know that they're not ready to jump each other's bones, here, but ending their "mentorship" relationship opens up some possibilities. Not all the possibilities... but we are decidedly on our way.

Because, once again, Lucy has cracked the surface of Tim's hardened shell. Even with his closest friends, he can be closed-off sometimes. We see a huge shift in him in S3 that shifts even further into S4 just in his personal relationships.

But S3 Tim still has a lot of walls up. And keeping his life boxed out helps him get through it. If he mixed and muddled the boxes, he might have to actually face some of his trauma. And he's not ready for that.

"Oh, so we are in a relationship?"

Tim's look back is amazing. Like, "are you kidding me right now?"

Look, she gets under his skin (and he gets under hers), but now it's fun. Like, neither of them is going to admit it at this point, but it's fun!

There was a guy in High School that I had a huge crush on. Duncan McFaddyn. Dumbest crush I ever had, but I liked him. And we were so good at arguing. I liked arguing with him. It was fun.

Tim and Lucy like arguing. Not the big, explosive fights they sometimes have. But those moments where they are on opposite sides of an issue, still get along, but want to needle each other. It's a part of their rhythm.

"Look, you need to get your head right in case this goes bad." "I"m squared away." "The fact that you just said that means you're not." "Look, you've been lucky on the job so far-"

Look. At. Her. Reaction. And he realizes immediately what he said. He wasn't thinking about what happened with Caleb, because it was after-hours. But facing Rosalind after? That was on the job, and planty of horrible other things have been, too.

But, let's be real, it's not like any of this has been a cake-walk.

"No. Alright. I'm sorry. That, that came out wrong."

Love this growth for him. Tim is actually apologizing to Lucy, and owning up that he misspoke. Well done, Tim.

"You've been through hell. Stuff that would've broken a lot of veteran cops."

He holds her gaze on that. Because he needs her to know he respects her. He needs her to know that what she's done is mighty. He needs her to know that he holds her to a higher esteem.

Tim of S1 had no idea what Lucy would be up against. It's only been a year, and he's seen her up-close. She's a badass.

"But a dead kid is different. A dead kid changes you forever." "I really hope our last shift together doesn't end with that." "Yeah, me, too."

You can see the pull at Tim's lip into a frown. Because, he's been there. He knows how that feels. And he never wanted to feel it, again, but today there's a very real possibility he will. And Lucy will, too.

Much as she gets under his skin, he doesn't want her to be changed by that. She was changed by her survival of a serial killer. Something he'd never wish on anyone.

He couldn't spare her that, but he wished he could... and he can't spare her however this goes... but he wishes he could. And much as he wouldn't admit it, I think he was starting to get a little scrambled in his head, too, as he thought about that.

Time to cleanse their minds.

"Okay, so what's next on your list?"

He leans into Lucy's latest distraction, much like he did when asking her to share her plans for sabotaging her ex's wedding. Tim told her then that she needed something that made sense, that was tangible, that they could grab onto.

Yes, Tim "grabbed onto" the first version of the list and chucked it out an open window. But, thank goodness Lucy came prepared.

Except this time she knows what he's doing. Look at the way she looks at him before reaching for the list. She knows what he's doing, and she's going with it.

"Okay. 'Surround yourself with people who support, value, and energize you.' Which... may have to wait until later."

I love how sharply he looks to her. Like, "really? I don't fit the bill?!" He's actually surprised by that, and I think it's kinda cute.

Tim isn't exactly a warm-and-fuzzy person. But there's something fascinating in him that connects with the people he cares about so they know without a shadow of a doubt that he does. Lucy knows.

But, yeah, she's not going out partying with Tim tonight after her last day as a Rookie.

"Then, uh, 'Reflect on the lesson learned, both the good and the bad, and express gratitude.'" "Okay. So, what have I taught you that you're grateful for?" "Umm. Hmm. Not to second-guess myself."

Tim nods, like, "Yup. That's the one". Because that's always been Lucy's biggest problem.

He's likely thinking of his original Plain Clothes Day review... and today's. But we'll get to that later.

"Yeah, early on one look from you could send me into a tailspin." "Plain Clothes Day." "Mm."

I swear, I didn't remember that Plain Clothes Day was mentioned almost the next second. But, they both know that was a rough one for her.

And look at his grin. As a TO, Tim's just a touch sadistic. I mean, he did take pride in being the guy who scared Rookies off.

And I get that, for him, it's about weeding out those who don't have what it takes. But, I'm also so thrilled for all of Tim's growth as a character.

"But I've learned to trust my instincts, even if they go against what you would do, which will be crucial for Under Cover work." "You serious about being UC?" "Yeah. Why? Do you think I'm not tough enough?" "No, it's not about being tough. I mean, look, you're as tough as they come."

Heck, yeah, she is! Tim is laying on those compliments today. Wow. And I don't think he's doing it consciously. They both know that this is their last ride, and much as Tim's pretending he doesn't care... we know he does.

On her last day, he's not barking at her about what she doesn't know. He's not issuing Tim Tests. He's not reminding her that he still has a final review to write where he holds her fate in his hands.

He's telling her how amazing she is. Tim doesn't say, "you're amazing. You're fantastic. You're sensational. You're golden."

But when he held her in his arms on the other side of that barrel, he did say, "You're so strong." He says it his way.

Today it's, "You're as tough as they come." Tim is telling her in his way that she is amazing as a cop. And that is huge from Tim.

You have to know how to read between the lines with S3 Tim. Lucy's still learning. Much as she knows, there's still a long way to go. And that's part of what makes this whole relationship so damn compelling to watch. They're always peeling back layers.

"It's just you're... sensitive."

He was searching for that right word, and almost smiles on it. Much as he isn't ready to admit it, it's something he likes about her. He hasn't had a lot of women in his life that weren't tough-as-nails. Someone who has so much sensitivity and sweetness... but can also be tough-as-nails? She's her own class of human.

But Tim's worried she's lacking something she needs for UC. And that's truly where this comes from—concern.

"You are. Look what happened with Tamara. You gave her your car, for crying out loud. And today, today this whole need to relive the last year, talk about our feelings." "I happen to think that caring about people, connecting with them, is what makes me a good cop." "It does."

Yowza, he's complimenting her a lot today! But... this one isn't sweet. it's bitter. Because Tim's looking at it as a weakness much as he thinks it's her strength.

"Just not a good UC. Look, to work Under Cover, you have to be able to lie to someone's face, make them believe you're their best friend, and then stab them in the back. I just don't think you have that killer instinct."

Because he's measuring everything against the folks he knows. Nyla. Angela. Isabel.

All the people who went UC that he's known weren't as compassionate and "sensitive". So, he's not convinced that Lucy can do it and he's trying, again, not to set her up for a bad experience.

"I'm sorry, but it's better you hear it now."

He thinks he's looking out for her. He truly thinks he's doing what's best for her.

Remember how I talked about perspective in another Meta? Tim's made the excuse that because he has been shoulder-to-shoulder with Lucy for a year, and that he has seen multiple UCs in action (and married one), that he knows what's best. Big mistake. He is trying to help her see her blind spot (which is really his).

But, instead, he threw down the gauntlet. And Lucy Chen is ready for it.

"And I appreciate your honesty. You always tell me the truth, no matter how painful it's gonna be. And you deserve the same from me."

He was nodding up until that last part. And, I'm going to be honest, I've only ever watched this scene once before. So, rewatching this and analyzing it is an act of love for all y'all.

Look, I don't like to watch horror movies, right? But I once wrote a Pilot that started with a woman being literally split in half, and I wrote a detailed description of blood, entrails, etc. Same with awkward/uncomfortable scenes. I can write them. I can read them. But watching them, I feel everything in the scene.

I don't know if it's my former life as an actress, my overall sensitivity as a human, or how amazingly these actors perform it, but I don't like watching the discomfort of this scene. I know all y'all love it. Because, it's bloody delicious. She turns it all around on him, and this scene is needed for so many reasons (which I'll get into later).

But I hope you know I love y'all to be watching this, again. It's paused and my blood pressure's already up.

Also, can we talk about how clueless Tim is right now? Lucy just said that the number one lesson she appreciates is how she's learned not to second guess herself, even if it goes against what Tim would do. That should have been his first clue that something was up.

But his pride got in the way. And Lucy knew it would.

"I've been struggling with being honest with you all day. I've been hiding behind this stupid closure checklist trying to get up the courage to tell you something." "Okay? What?"

Now he's starting to get worried. What's wrong with Lucy?

And Lucy. Takes. Her. Time. She lets the anticipation build before letting loose with it.

"I have feelings for you."

Tim is side-eyeing so hard I think his eyes are gonna roll out of his head. He can not believe what he's hearing.

He looks around as though somewhere in front of him there's confirmation that there's a full moon, or a magic potion, or any other reason Lucy would say something like that.

And it's right there, but he doesn't see it.

Hmmmm. Why doesn't he see it?

Look, I'm not saying he wants to undress her right there, or anything, but Tim does have a special spot for Lucy. Though, he wouldn't name it. I don't think he'd know how.

It's not romantic, yet. But it's important. Lucy means more to him that he ever expected, but there's no name for what he feels for her. It's a special kind of soulmate bond that sneaks up on both of them. The deep connection forms first. The romance comes later.

"Uh, like, f-"

He's still trying to figure out if she means what he thinks she means. Surely, this is one of those situations where she means something else, right?

"Look, we've been through a lot this year. I mean... you saved my life."

Now Tim is uncomfortable. He looks like he's considering jumping out of the Shop and gauging just how many civilians would be injured it if meant he could transport out of this conversation.

Look, he and Lucy are nowhere near ready to date. They're friends, and even that's something he refuses to acknowledge (but didn't dispute the last time she said it).

And this is mad uncomfortable.

Okay. Story time. April 9, 2003, I decided to break up with my boyfriend of a year and a half. April 16, 2003, I met a really sweet guy but never mentioned said boyfriend because I knew I was breaking up with him.

April 23, 2003, Sweet Guy asks me out...and it was so. damn. awkward. Because I had to tell this guy about a boyfriend and pretend I am still interested in him since I'd yet to have time to break up with the guy.

Tim was a little nicer than I was. My first response to the Sweet Guy was, "Excuse me?"

And, yes, that's the man I would later marry. We have the strangest love story.

"And I didn't want to say anything before because I didn't want to put you in a weird position. But now, I mean, I think, I think the reason why you're so protective of me and, and why you don't want me to be an undercover cop is because...because you have feelings for me, too."

He. Can't. Look. At. Her. And I am squirming in my seat in the Parent Pickup Line, thank you very much. Oh, Tim wants to escape this Shop so badly.

"Lucy, I-" "No, listen. I-I know it's complicated. You're my TO."

Now the boy is reeling. And we'll see him reel again like this in 4x22, for those of you looking to the future, but for different reasons. His hand pops off the wheel because right now reality doesn't even make sense. And that's Eric Winter, again, acting through his finger tips.

Now, I'm not saying he feels nothing towards her. We already established there's an unnamed bond there. But this "feelings" talk is outta left field and he believes her.

And leave it to Melissa O'Neil to take us on this wild ride with Lucy. See, I saw this at the top of Season 5, because that's when I got into the show. But I can imagine how folks watching this live must've wondered if there was a smidgen of truth in the performance.

But if you're watching, you can feel the intent in every choice. It's really beautifully done.

"You're responsible for me."

I just checked and I have roughly 50 seconds left of this torture. It has taken me 20 minutes at two different locations just to transcribe this because it's that painful for me.

It's a weird tick I have! Writing awkward? Sure. Acting it? Heck, yeah. I play awkward characters really well because I'm not pretty enough to be a leading lady.

But watching it always squicks me out. I feel every ounce of the energy pouring off of Tim in this scene. I want to reach through the screen and hug him.

I'm that girl in the theater who the crying actor always locks eyes on because I'm sobbing my eyes out with them. I feel what they feel. And they feed off of that.

It's happened when I've gone to professional and community theater alike. I react and the actors latch onto it, fueling their performance. It's a very odd responsibility.

Watching awkward scenes is akin to watching people lick and eat blood on television, for me. It makes me sick to my stomach, but I literally know the proper way to mix blood for television (gotta have some blue in there), and have done so for student projects where I brutally murdered people back in college (to be clear... murdered fictional characters, not real people).

My mother used to practice her prosthetics on me, and I'd be covered with bullet holes, busted lips, bruises, and goose eggs. But I don't like watching it any more than I do awkward scenes.

So the more Tim squirms, the more I'm squirming with him.

"I know that you would never cross that line, but, starting tomorrow, I guess you're not. And I-"

He holds up his hand and it switches to a point to try to stop her because words have failed him. Tim's not much of a words guy as it is, but he's truly lost the ability to form coherent thoughts, let along coherent sentences.

Lucy watches that finger with interest. She knows she's gotten under his skin in some way.

"First of all, I, I, just, like, thank you."

Thank you!? Son, if she really did love you, that's about the most insulting thing you can say. But he also doesn't want to hurt her. He might not have "feelings" for her, but he does care about her. We know he does.

And right now, he believes her.

"Um, you're. Look, Lucy, I'm flattered. I am. You're a great girl."

A girl? What is she, a puppy? Tim, you are great at a lot of things. This is not one of them. You are very bad at this.

"Woman. Woman. And I... Um... Crap."

She's starting to lose it. It's been doable up until this point, but he is fumbling so bad. The laugh is building up in Lucy and she can't even look at him, so she turns toward the window... and the camera.

And, look, Tim must be terrifying for whoever reviews the footage to not leak this around the station for laughs. Because, this is comedy gold.

"Listen." *laughs* "Are you kidding me?!"

Can we take a second to appreciate whoever wrote the Closed Captions for this one, because the ?! are absolutely there, and it's perfect. Tim is horrified, upset, annoyed, impressed, and relieved all at once.

"I'm sorry." "Are you kidding me?" "Wait, I'm sorry." "Oh, you're sorry."

The anxiety she just put that man through!! Trying to figure out how to acknowledge there's a bond between them, but that it's not romantic, and that him not being her TO wouldn't be enough for him to cross it... but he doesn't want to hurt her... and trying to find that balance in words as a man who doesn't use his words...

Yeah, he just had two minutes of pure hell.

"Wait, just wait, lie to your face, check. Make you think I've fallen for you, double check."

Oh, how he tries to shrug that one off. Because, look, much as he isn't ready for her to be in love with him (or him with her), he believed it. And for two minutes he had to hurriedly process it.

"Oh, and stab you in the back when you think we're best friends, triple check. Look me in the face." "Nope." "And tell me you don't think I have the killer instinct to do undercover work. Look me in my face."

That little smirk. It's not a smile. It's the kind of look you give the kid in the back who really gets on your nerves when you want them to know you heard them, and you're pissed.

Shit Got Weird

Tim and Lucy ride in silence... which is rare for Lucy. She looks at him, then away. He feels her gaze and looks back, then away. But he re-situates his right hand on the wheel. He's still reeling from that little stunt she pulled.

And it's a weird mixture of pride, being impressed, and being a little hurt she didn't really fall in love with him.

Because even though they aren't ready to go there, and aren't even thinking it, yet, he got to feel what it was like for a few seconds to think she was interested in him. And it's gonna take a bit to get that feeling to disappear from his memory. She kinda made the whole thing extra memorable.

"It's weird, now, isn't it?" "Nope." "I was just making a point." "And you're undermining it by feeling guilty."

Touché, Timmy. The killer instinct doesn't feel guilty. It does what it needs to do.

"Did you study post-partum depression in your Psych major?" "Yeah. PPD is fairly common. Affects 1 in 8 new moms."

I was that 1 in 8. After my twins, I suffered from really bad PPD for about six months. I loved my twins, and while I felt attached to them, I felt detached from the world and my ability to be what they needed.

I hit the bottom really hard, and every morning drive alone was perilous to my health. If you are struggling, please reach out for help.

Nobody realized what was going on with me until I pulled myself out. And I hate that I was dismissed every time I tried to point out something was wrong. I had the happy ending getting through on my own. Too many people post-partum don't. We need to change that.

But, the part of this that I love for Tim and Lucy is Tim spent the top half of this poking at her psychology major, but now it's coming in handy. Because there is a place for different approaches, and Tim needs to remember that sometimes.

"We did it." "No, you did it."

Remember when Tim used to say that Lucy's accomplishments were his accomplishments? Back when she became the Mid-Wilshire champ at the range? He's done with that. Tim Bradford is acknowledging Lucy and her accomplishments. And that's growth.

It also reminds me of when he and Lucy talked about how he saved her from the barrel. He tells her that she saved herself. Someday I hope these two realize that in the most beautiful ways, they save each other.

"What's this?" "It's a copy of your final evaluation. I wrote it before our shift today." "Like Plain Clothes Day." "Only this time I didn't have to rewrite it."

All the feels on that one. The evaluation on Plain Clothes Day was a gut-punch before he re-wrote it.

"Officer Chen impressed me with every decision she made today. I will miss riding with her."

He listens to her reading his words... drinking in her response. It's not love, no. But pride. Look at the twinkle in his eyes. He's proud of her.

And Lucy was right. At the top of shift, she asked if he was going to miss her. She already knew it. But to know he had that pre-written is confirmation of what she already knew—they care about each other. They're friends. They'll miss being around each other every day.

Tim holds out his hand to her, and you can see Lucy's surprise, but elation at it. He's meeting her as an equal, finalizing the completion of their time together as TO/Boot, and accepting her as a full-blown Officer, no longer on probation.

He's the first to welcome her to the other side. And there's something really poetic about that.

"You don't let anyone ever tell you you can't do something. Not even me."

He's holding her hand the whole time, this bridge of connection between them. Because Lucy Chen showed him something new today. Just when he thought he had her all figured out, she showed him that someone can be kind and killer. Compassionate and cut-throat.

Tim's always had absolutes in his life. There wasn't much room for grey, and he struggles with that, sometimes.

When we first met him, he had wrapped himself in cynicism and bravado to protect the pieces of his broken heart. Over the years, partly with the help of Lucy, he's learned how to find the humanity inside, again.

Hope isn't weakness. It's human. And he has started to learn to hope, again. Much as he's been teaching her, she's been teaching him.

And today she taught him you don't have to be one thing or fit in a box to be great at something. You can be many things, even if they sometimes seem contradictory.

Potential shouldn't be limited by check boxes. Tim has seen Lucy's strength. He's seen her sensitivity. Now, he's seen her sniper-like reflexes. She's many amazing things, and he's excited to see what she does, now, on her own.

"Yes sir."

Her hand drops from his, and he shoves his back in his pockets, a familiar place. But there's a smile playing on his lips.

"Step five—acceptance. Our checklist is complete."

Now he's really smiling. No teeth, no, but a real smile that reaches his eyes. Lucy's drawing it out of him more and more as time goes on.

"Um, I have a gift for you."

That surprises Tim. (It's been a day full of surprises, right?)

"It's a thank you for every lesson I had to learn." "Uh, should I open it, now?" "Absolutely. Mmhmm." "Okay."

And she takes. a. step. back. First time watching this, I thought, "Oh, what now!?"

I was not disappointed.

"I'll be dumb before I'm wise," says the music as Tim. Opens. His... POOF!

"It's been a blast, sir." "I'll see you tomorrow, Lucy." "See you tomorrow, Tim."

Ceremonial retiring of "Boot" for Lucy, achieved... in a puff of powder and giggles.

Y'all, this was a tough one for me to get through. And it's something I've apparently passed onto my kids, because none of us like watching uncomfortable/awkward moments. But the significance of this episode warranted my discomfort.

This is more than Lucy crossing that first finish line of her carer. This is more than Tim and Lucy's last ride. This is the moment that Tim Bradford truly realized what kind of person and cop Lucy is—the kind that he'll never fully peg. (Well....)

I mean, Lucy is full of surprises. And that'll be marvelous and frustrating for them going forward.

But this is the episode where he sees her completely as her own officer, where he admits that he'll miss her, which is indirectly admitting that he feels their bond, too. And this is the episode where he realizes he can't say a damn thing about her doing UC.

He's never been thrilled about Lucy doing UC, and after Isabel, we can understand why. But it was more than that, all this time. He was worried about protecting Lucy from finding out she wasn't good enough. Only for him to realize he had no business telling her what she could and couldn't do.

Tim does take his duty as her "fierce protector" seriously, even before DOD. And that's just a part of their rhythm, of who they are, and it can morph into something really beautiful should these two get their act together down the line.

For now, Season 3 Tim and Lucy are on the most level footing of their relationship, thus far, and it's all thanks to the transitions that this episode provided.

As always, thank you for reading. My Littlest was home sick all day and I worked late all night last night to stay on top of things. So, I had some free time tonight after bedtime to myself. Back's still mending, but much better, too.

Onward to what's next. Stay frosty out there.

[katsu28]

pancakes

pairing: Drew Starkey x reader

summary: Y/N gets a craving for late night pancakes but she’s a disaster in the kitchen

warnings: none just fluffy Drew content 

a/n: oh look it’s me, back with another short and fluffy one shot (two in one night who is she??)

masterlist + taglist

You hadn’t been able to sleep for most of the night, and it was starting to piss you off. You also couldn’t toss, turn, or make frustrated noises like you usually did, because you’d just recently moved in with your boyfriend, Drew—who, adding to your frustration, was sleeping soundly beside you like a little baby. 

Looking at the clock, you let out a small huff when you saw it was 3:27AM, and gently eased yourself out of Drew’s iron grip around your waist. You had just crept your way into the kitchen for a glass of water, when the craving for pancakes hit you like a truck.

Being as quiet as you could, you grabbed all the ingredients you needed. The only thing you were missing was a huge bowl to mix everything in. 

The only problem was, you and Drew hadn’t unpacked much yet, seeing as you’d both had a hectic few weeks, so all your kitchen stuff was still sealed away in the cardboard boxes littering the entirety of the apartment floor. But your pancake craving was so strong, there was no way you weren’t going to make them. 

Very carefully, you combed through every single box on the floor, but unfortunately came up empty. You eventually spotted the labeled box, but it was just your luck that it was the top box of the tallest stack. Maybe if you climbed up on the counter, you could reach the box.

Either you miscalculated, or your judgment was impaired by your pancake craving, because when you hopped on the counter and reached for it, your fingers ended up tipping it the opposite way. You watched in horror as the box went crashing to the floor, the contents of it falling out and rolling every which way loudly. 

Before you could even react, Drew materialized from the hallway,  squinting at you with half-open eyes, and hair a fluffy brown mess on his head. 

“Hi.” You said sheepishly, offering your very sleepy—but very adorable—boyfriend a guilty grin. 

“What are you doing?” He asked, rubbing his eye and fighting a yawn. “And why are you standing on the counter?” 

“I needed the big bowl to make pancakes.” 

“At four in the morning???”

“I couldn’t sleep.” You pouted, plopping down on the counter and swinging your legs over the side. “Sorry I woke you up—turns out I’m not as tall as I thought I was.” 

A flicker of a grin made its way across Drew’s face as he padded over to you with outstretched arms.

“I thought someone was breaking in, and when I didn’t feel you beside me, I got scared,” He murmured, pressing a kiss to the top of your head as his arms slid around your waist. “Next time, just wake me up, okay, sweetheart?” 

“You looked so cute sleeping.” You sighed, wrapping your arms around Drew’s neck with a tiny nod. “You can go back to bed now, I got this.” 

“You’re using the stove, I need to make sure you don’t burn our brand new apartment down.” 

“Fuck you,” You grumbled, pushing him away with a hmph, even though you were smiling, because he was probably right. Drew laughed, grabbing your hand and pulling you back for a kiss. You kissed him back blissfully, threading your fingers through his messy bedhead. 

“I love you.” He whispered against your lips. 

“I love pancakes.” You giggled, wiggling out of his embrace and skipping to pick up the fallen metal bowl. 

“Oh, now that’s just mean.” Drew groaned, throwing his head back with a squinty pout. 

“Come on, help me make them!” 

“I hate you.” 

“I love you too, baby, you know I do!” 

“Apparently you love pancakes more.” 

Taglist!

@unbelievablystillafangirl @fearthewalkingbitch @laneybobeczko-g @conans-folk

if your username is crossed out it means tumblr won't let me tag you :(

[themotherdeerest]

It took some bribing, but Aya managed to get a single letter smuggled up to Heaven from Hell, to Eveline. It was long and rambling, multiple pages telling Eveline she got. Why she was in Hell, what it was really like. How Heaven lied - not all Sinners were pure evil. And telling her to be careful, because it was her questioning that got sent her down there in the first place.

But it was one section in particular that would most likely catch Eveline's eye:

I met your son. Small world, huh? He works at the Hotel I'm staying at, as the Hotelier, and sometimes still does radio. He's...

It's clear Aya re-wrote this part several times, erasing and re-writing as she tried to figure out how to explain what Alastor was like without giving Eveline a heart attack.

He's doing well. Funnily enough, his appearance is a little like mine - deer-ish, with ears and antlers. No legs like mine, though. He's also, like, 7 feet tall. While he doesn't say it, I think he misses you. I made your gumbo the other night and he recognized it.

That was an understatement. She rambles on a little more about the others, painting a picture of life in Hell not being quite as bad as Heaven made it out to be. Hard, certainly, but not the end of the world.

I miss our book clubs - I hope you and the others are keeping well without me! All my love, Aya

It had been quite the heartbreak when Eveline had found out her friend had left, a feeling that only deepened when not a soul would tell her why, the regularity of Heaven wasn't often broken and it was jarring enough. The arrival letter cleared up much of that, opened her eyes to the injustice of Heaven and worst of all, served to incite a mother's rage.

Time passed strangely in heaven, the blur of comfort and contentment constructed perfectly to make it easy to forget time at all. She couldn't help but wonder just how long her son had been dead, how it happened, a cacophony of questions that finally spurred her to action.

Demanding to see her son won her nothing. Pleading. Crying. All had been dismissed and there was only so long she was willing to wait. First she'd update Aya, prepare her in case she did fall too, then she'd make her case.

Dear Aya, It's monsterous what they've done to you, I can hardly believe Heaven of all places would stoop so low, making a sweet girl like you go down and face Hell unprepared. Despite your warning I've kicked up quite the stink about it, I won't have them sweep such a thing under the rug as they seem to be doing with everything else. I can hardly believe my poor boy ended up down there too, goodness knows what they think they're doing! I'm glad he's doing well for himself and keeping up his passion for the radio, hopefully those down there can appreciate his talents/ I would ask that you not tell him what I'm doing, lord knows he wouldn't be best pleased if he found out. Please look after yourself and do keep in contact if you can, I'm doing whatever I can to change what's happened for both you and my boy. I miss him too and think of him often, hopefully I'll be able to tell him that myself soon enough. Lots of love, Eveline.

Attached was a recipe for shrimp and sausage gumbo. She hadn't been certain if they'd even have all the ingredients there but she could hope.

[x-authorship-x]

You: Send me a Shisui ship and I will try and make it work

Me, taking aim to throw my Anko/Shisui at you: (ﾉ ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

Yo! ✨

Well, I'm a man* of my word~

Shisui/Anko is such a good ship 👀 I know I have them in HOPE AU as like "frenemies who have ST" but i could so easily twist that into an actually cohesive relationship...!

Let's get into the details..

Anko and Shisui work because of a few very tasty ingredients:

1) They both have experience with being devoted to the guidance of a superior only to have that thrown back in their face. For Shisui, he believed Danzo was helping (alongside Sarutobi) him stop the unrest without bloodshed only for Danzo to stab Shisui in the back, steal his bloodline, and hunt him for dead and then later orchestrate the massacre. Anko was devoted to Orochimaru, her sensei, only to discover his experimental atrocities and be left behind when he fled, a cursed seal fucking with her chakra in a village that now distrusted and reviled her. Talk about empathetic parallels!

2) they're fucked up in similar but varying ways. Anko embraces and plays on it, she enjoys toying with others and making them squirm and she's made a career out of the more unsettling branches of Shinobi work. Shisui is easy going and socially adept but underneath this lurks the potential for great violence and even greater mental fuckery. Anko might have you tripping balls as she rips out your fingernails but Shisui will manipulate you so good that you won't even remember the pain wasn't your idea. Together, they're a safe space of appreciation and acceptance of each other's viciousness without the need to moderate or sanitise their darkness.

3) they can match energy. Anko is extroverted and Shisui is an ambivert. This means that Anko can tear across the town and Shisui will grin and run even faster (this turns into a very dangerous game of tag that makes every single other person in Konoha wish the happy couple would cut them a break) because their energies feeds off each other. They'll fuck with people as a double act (getting Genma in on this is very dangerous) and bitch together. Shisui is technically the nicer one to approach but Anko is rarely far behind if she spots someone talking to him (and vice versa, although interrupting Anko is more because Shisui wants to witness the conversation OR to take pity on her victim). When they're in their Bad Feels, there is an unspoken level of understanding and any raging and/or wallowing will be done together (whilst Shisui is more likely to mope, Anko might lash out, and Shisui knows exactly how to handle the choking clutch of feeling too much, it's all good)

4) the nickname potential. Shisui will straight up call Anko 'my partner in crime' instead of gf.

Mikoto: your girlfriend? Lover? Other half?

Shisui: my inmate.

Meanwhile, Anko is torturing everyone within hearing distance

Anko: boytoy, wifey, victim, bitch, Twunk, stalker, pet project, sugar baby, parole officer

Shisui: :) yes?

Everyone else: 👁️👄👁️

Basically i think they're so much fun- angsty, yeah ofc, but with such potential for shenanigans too!

Shisui: so there's this plot for a coup and I'm trying to stop it and it's really stressful and also I'm missing an eye, babe, because Danzo betrayed me and stole it ;'(((

Anko: *already priming a massive fucking bomb* do you have his address? Nevermind, we'll hit every important building on the way-

Long story short- a great ship! Enjoy, Anon✨

[safety-net-did]

Today was the second day of the stabilization dose for the simulant. It's too early to be sure, especially with outside influences, but I think I might prefer the middle dose.

The weekend was kinda a lot. Went out of town with the ze-partner to see a comedy show. He-partner's mum had gotten tickets but decided she wasn't comfortable with the COVID risk anymore, so we had three tickets. Got to invite one of my primary friends, who I haven't seen since before COVID.

We made a day of it. Went to the city's local art gallery, then met up with friend to wander around the mall for a bit and catch up before the show. It was a lot of fun, but it was a lot, y'know?

We also managed to take just about every wrong turn possible the whole day, which was funny but stressful.

Sunday was supposed to be grocery day... But everyone was worn out. While doing morning stuff we saw a rogue dog tearing down the street, so I popped some shoes on and took after it in my pyjamas. Managed to track it down and coordinate with the owner (who was being playfully, skillfully evaded, and thoroughly ignored).

Thankfully the power of "new friend‽" is very strong. Especially in young Australian Shepards- she must've been about 8 months old. So once I was close enough and in eye sight, I just went to the ground and knelt down low and playful. She ran up and mirrored me, and as soon as she found me safe rolled over for excited belly scritches... Which let me grab her collar and get her back to her person.

According to my partners I have experienced a higher than average number of helping strangers with odd things moments like this in my life. 🤷(shrug) I like helping people, and seem to notice and react to situations a bit more readily than most people? Idk.

Anyway. The partners had their scheduled important relationship talk on Sunday, too. I was there to help- emotional support partner! It went somewhat better than expected, tbh. We'll know more in about two weeks, at the follow up talk, how well it went exactly.

That was a very emotionally draining activity though.

He-partner had his newest datemate over that evening, while ze-partner, step-teen and I chilled out and had a fire in the backyard. He had another date night with other datemate tonight after work. I'm in constant awe of his neutotypical ability to just. Do stuff, all the time.

Ze-partner and I did the grocery shopping after ze finished work today.

I put my big U pillow in the laundry because a one of the dogs vomited on it, and I'm worried I won't sleep well since it is still drying.

Made a quick dinner and realised that one of the food-related issues I'm having is that meatier and more processed foods are especially unappealing (like literally just more ingredients/flavours/levels of cooking, not necessarily high sugar/high fat "junk" foods). I was interested in and able to eat a solid portion of steamed mixed vegetables. But I couldn't get even a single piece of the beef noodles in my mouth.

I am very verbose today. In writing at least. This is the third quite long post I've written today (and the first one I had to write twice since Tumblr ate it). I like it. I miss writing.

[mylittlegemlins]

Hello tumblr, during my childhood I was really obsessed with smurfs and since I found out that they released a reboot, which unfortunately I haven´t yet been able to see, I think I had some inspiration and ended up writing this.

I don't usually post this kind of blog about series unless I'm too immersed in it because I feel like it's too childish but to hell, blogging about-analyzing series for kids is my entertainment method and if I can't post about my likes on Tumblr I don't know why have an account.

So I present:

How to catch the Smurfs

This is the definitive tutorial on everything Gargamel ever did to catch the little blue critters.

It is based mainly on the animated series from the 80s and the 3 films that were produced between 2011-2017, I watched several episodes again to write this, but I still hope I don't forget some important information.

Following these steps:

1. Why catch the Smurfs?

During the comics, the series and the recent movies there were many reasons why Gargamel and other humans wanted to capture the Smurfs that change over time, among its main uses we have:

- They are ingredients for exotic dishes.

-Turn them into gold

- Ingredient for the Philosopher's Stone

- Use its essence to obtain magic

- Their tears serve as an ingredient for spells

-Their skin serves as a treatment to cure diseases

2. Points to consider:

This is a set of rules that fall between the lines when using a Smurf for any of the recipes mentioned above.

2.1 How many are needed:

In some episodes Gargamel was about to cook a single Smurf, so 1 is enough to eat them.

To turn them into gold you need at least half a kilo, about 6 smurfs.

2.2. They don't need to be alive

I didn't remenber any place where it said that Smurfs must be alive to use them in recipes.

2.3. Smurfette doesn't always count

She has to be a real smurf or else it won't work, during her first appearance before the papa smurf spell and the episode "smurfette unmade" where she reverts to her original form she is not a real smurf, so it wouldn't work unless that is in its blonde form.

2.4. Fake Smurfs:

The reason Gargamel can't just create another Smurf and use it in his recipes is because his creations are blue clay with a conscience, to turn them into real Smurfs you need the “true blue”spell

2.5. Artificial Smurfs:

Smurfette, Sassete, Kactus, Vicky and any other Smurf they come up with in the future, count as real Smurfs only after their transformation.

To clarify the points, these are the steps:

3.Locate them

The Smurfs are in a village protected by a magical force that makes it invisible or unreachable, it is only possible to find the village if a Smurf guides you to it, even after finding the exact location it will have disappeared if you try to return, so the best It is marks the surroundings of the village and look for them in the places that the Smurfs frequent.

It is possible to capture them when they leave the village, force them to guide you, enter the village using teleportation spells or hoaxes.

4.Traps

Catching smurfs is relatively easy, you can chase them with butterfly nets, catch them with your bare hands, using a cat or any other hunting animal, now that I think about it a hound would be very useful to track their scent.

Using some classic traps to hunt animals also works with Smurfs, traps with cages or hidden holes in the ground, or camouflage in a bush until a Smurf is close enough to catch it, you can't use traps like an obvious cage with food in it, they are too smart to fall for that.

It is more effective if they are placed in strategic places such as a field of smurfberries which is outside the village.

Small female creatures are also used as decoys, such as female smurfs, little mermaids and lymph to make a smurf fall in love and thus leave the village to a point where they can be captured.

5.Which Smurfs to capture

Personally I think there are Smurfs that are easier to catch, although Gargamel could not have a list of all with so many times that they have passed by his house, he should already recognize one or another Smurf and I remember that there is a episode where he knows some of his names.

The main cast, Smurfette, Hefty, Brainy, Clumsy, Greedy, Grouchy, Jokey and Handy as far as i can remember, they´re the ones that have been captured the most times and also the ones that have escaped the most, since they're easy to capture, it would be convenient to take advantage of this, but since they know how to get out, they should change the cages with them, put the cages in another place, move the objects that previously used to get out, and above all not to fall the same tricks again.

Papa smurf has been captured many times, he is the one who most leaves the village and if in one of his trips they capture him, maybe the others would not notice his absence, it is something difficult because he already knows how to escape and he can use spells against you, but if you manage to kill him the others would be lost without their leader, and with the disaster they would be easier to capture.

Lazy smurf takes naps during his work outside the village so it's a good chance to catch him, hopefully he might still be asleep while preparing the recipe and he won't try to escape.

According to his debut episode sickly smurf was never able to escape from Gargamel and Azrael; it is so easy that he catches him with his bare hands in 20 seconds.

Baby Smurf is more vulnerable for obvious reasons, the negative side is that there is always a Smurf looking after him, but if they manage to separate the baby it would be easy to cook , considering the life expectancy of the Smurfs is more than 500 years, it may remain a baby for the next 10 years so there is time to execute your plan.

Nat, Snapy, Sassete and Slouchy, the 4 children Smurfs that appear in season 5 are in almost the same circumstances as Baby Smurf.

In Wild Smurf's first appearance he kicked Gargamel in the face and easily made Azrael afraid of him so it might not be a good idea to mess with him.

I guess Smurfs like scaredy would never leave the village unless they forced it so the only times he gets caught is when they capture all 100 together.

6.Don't let them escape

In many occasions the Smurfs escape when they have already been captured by Gargamel, either from his hands, cages and in their closest attempts they escape from the pot.

These are the points to keep in mind:

6.1 Capture only one

If you capture a single Smurf than two or more as it will take a while for them to realize that one is missing and they will not come to their rescue, the more they are, the more likely they will find a plan to escape, so keep them in mind. separate cages.

6.2 The others will come

Once Gargamel has one or more Smurfs, it is 100% certain that the others will come to rescue him at his house, so it would be convenient to go to another place away from the forest where he can cook the Smurfs without others being able to find them. Gargamel has a basement with a secret door, he was able to hide there and pretend he didn't have them until the rescuers leave.

6.3 catch rescuers

Knowing that more Smurfs could come, you could use it to your advantage by placing traps on the doors and windows, or on the contrary, closing everything so that it is impossible to enter without having a key.

6.4 They will leave him for dead

In the episode "the tear of a Smurf ", it seems that if they don't find a missing Smurf it only takes a week for them to surrender and prepare for his funeral. You can hide the smurfs with their mouths tied up in a drawer and pretend you don't know what they are talking about until they give up, then it will be time to execute the recipes. If Gargamel had enough brain cells to keep the secret, he could eat the Smurfs and the rest would think they were eaten by birds or something and would not take revenge.

6.5. Do not look any further

If you already have 99 it is enough, even if you have only one, it is not worth risking it to find one more, it is a trap.

6.6. Don't open jokey surprises.

The characters always forget that gift.

6.7. Don't listen to them

On several occasions they try to make conversation to buy time, they trick him into thinking that he will bring more Smurfs or that he cannot eat him, everything is a trap.

6.8. Just kill them

He never did that but it's a very obvious choice, I don't remember somewhere saying that smurfs have to be alive for recipes, Gargamel has repeatedly expressed his desire to destroy them. Wouldn't it be easier to kill them before throwing them into the pot? if you can't, they don't even have to be dead, just unconscious or asleep. Gargamel has drops of lava in his lab for some reason, how come he doesn't have substances to knock them unconscious? In case he have many captured you could use classic techniques such as placing the cage in a tub of water until they drown, even stepping on them would be enough since they are very small.

6.9. Papa Smurf's books

If Gargamel tries to kill them with an epidemic, papa will have the cure, if he casts a spell, papa has the antidote, since he has been in the village on several occasions, he should take the opportunity to steal or destroy their books, he could look for the true blue spell and perhaps find another useful spell.

7.Enjoy your smurf soup

If that's all i came up with, you can already eat or become a millionaire at the cost of a smurf's life, hopefully you'll have to face a horrible revenge from papa smurf, but i'm not responsible for that.

8.Other methods to get smurfs:

This is a set of theories for alternative ways to get smurfs without capturing one from the village.

8.1. create smurfs:

In the second live action movie gargamel gets the formula for the true blue spell, so from here technically he could create smurfs, then transform them into real smurfs and do whatever he wants with them, during the series he had to look for the formula instead to look for smurfs.

8.2. Clone Smurfs:

In the episode "the hundredth smurf" Vanity creates a clone of himself that eventually integrates into the village, it is a genetically exact clone so there is no doubt that it is a real smurf. He just needs to place a mirror in front of a smurf and get it struck by lightning, Gargamel could capture a smurf and make clones that will work, he wouldn't even have to keep the original and he would have an infinite smurf machine.

8.3. Kidnap Baby Smurfs:

During the blue moon it is possible that a zork came to the village bringing a baby smurf, it can take up to 200 years without bringing one but if you are alive when that happens, you can try to hunt the zork and capture the defenseless baby.

8.4. Repeat the fake smurf technique:

If it is possible to create fake Smurfs like Smurfette, it might work on a second try, Smurfs are not very cautious around strangers, once Smurfette arrives in the village no one wonders where she came from or why she was in the forest, but rather Immediately they offer him a house, Gargamel could create a smurf and this time instruct him to lead all the smurfs in the village into a trap and make sure he does not turn good, he can also turn himself into a life-size smurf costume, Nobody will notice that there is an extra Smurf and he can repeat the same trap,third time’s a charm

9.Conclusion:

Surely there are many other methods to catch Smurfs but I can't see the whole series again even if I wanted to, because it is a series for children Gargamel never learns from his mistakes I think that catching Smurfs is not that exaggeratedly difficult, especially for someone who has access to magic may be as difficult as capturing a talking rabbit, Gargamel is just stupid.

The end.

[bts-storys]

Bathing a bomb (m)

Author: bts-storys

Pairing: Seokjin x Reader

Rating: mature content, 18+

Genre: Strangers to lovers/ Lush Store AU/ Smut

Word Count: 5,901

Summary: Your job at the Lush store isn’t what you would call extremely exciting. That is until one customer just won’t stay out of the shop. And for that matter he won’t stay out of your head either.

Warnings: oral (female receiving), fingering, dirty talk, graphic description of sex, penetration, lots of stuff with hands, because I feel like that's what lush is essentially about, Seokjin being handsome as ever, some daydreaming about a shower

A/N: I changed my narrative perspective a bit, I hope everything sounds better now. I won't lie, this piece gave me a real hard time, so happy so present to you what I worked on the last weeks.

„Damn it! “

You flinch when you hear an angry voice right on the other side of the wall, sitting upright again in the process. The door bursts open and someone marches right into the break room.

“Are you okay, June?”, you carefully ask your co-worker. When you catch a glimpse at her hands you cock an eyebrow. “Did you touch the lilac soap again?”

“Yes, for god’s sake!”, she grumbles while digging in her bag. “I hate this damn allergy!”

“I told you to wear some gloves or at least call me to take care of it instead”, you say in a judging tone.

“I know, I forgot them. And you’re on break Y/N!” She looks at you with an apologetic expression while opening a jar of cream from her bag.

You laugh. “Well I was until now. Don’t worry, I’ll take care of the customers and you do something about your hands, you look like an angry lobster.”

You put your coffee aside and your customer smile back on your face. Walking through the door, the overwhelming smell of hundreds of different scents washes right over you. When you first started working at the Lush store a few months prior, you found yourself with a headache at the end of every day from smelling so much all the time. When you had told June about it, she gave you a painkiller and assured you it would get better soon. She was right at the end and you grew into loving all the different scents. Nothing relaxes you more than the familiar fragrances in the store after a hard day of studying. You shake your head to get rid of the memory.

Even though June had been working here far longer, she just can’t deal with her lilac allergy due to her extreme stubbornness. Nara, your other co-worker is talking to a customer so you get back to one of the shelves and finish putting in the soap. Right at the last piece, someone behind you makes a coughing noise.

“Ehrm- Excuse me?”

You turn around. The speaker is a tall guy at least one head-length taller than you. He has broad shoulders and the most handsome face you have ever seen. His skin has a perfect shine as if he uses the exact right amount of moisturizer every day and his head looks perfectly shaped. His black hair matches his dark coat and the pair of boots he wears. His body-position gives off a high level of self-confidence, much contrary to his worried expression. His complete appearance is quite overwhelming and it takes you a second or two to get over yourself.

“Hi, what can I do for you?”, you smile at him.

He smiles back at you and you feel your heartbeat increase. “I was wondering… how many different bath bombs do you sell at the moment?”

Inwardly, you let out a sigh. Chances are pretty small, a handsome man like him would ask about bath bombs without the intention of giving them to a boyfriend or girlfriend. On the outside you maintain your customer smile.

“Right now, we have 20 different types of bath bombs here at the store. Do you have a specific fragrance you’re looking for?”

“N-No, not exactly. I want all of them…please.”

You look at him with confusion. “You want to buy every bath bomb in this store?!!”

“No!”, he quickly corrects. “I want to buy one of every type, if that’s possible.”

You start to laugh.

“I’m so sorry”, you tell him after getting a hold of yourself. “Of course, that’s possible, let’s grab a basket for you.”

He sends you a smile that gets right to your core. “Don’t worry, I know that it's a weird request. You have a cute laugh though.”

You feel your cheeks heat up, quickly turning around, reminding yourself that he is still a customer.

“Thank you, Sir. Let’s get to those bath bombs.”

“It’s Seokjin, actually. Please don’t call me ‘Sir’.”

You hide your surprise behind a straight face. “Okay Seokjin, follow me, please.”

You get to the counter where the bath bombs are stored, aware that he is right behind you. While filling the little basket with colorful shapes, you just can’t resist the curiosity.

“Soo, is there a reason to your special request?”, you ask him while scanning the stacks for more bombs.

“Um, I guess I just want to know what color they would produce. You know, all together.”

You turn around again, seeing him gulp.

“You want to use them all at once?” You try not to sound like you are laughing at him again, maintaining a neutral expression. “I’m finished by the way, so follow me to the checkout, please.”

You get behind the cash register, scanning the items before dropping them into a bag.

“Should I pack them as a gift?”, you try asking without raising his suspicion. Maybe he is still getting them for his SO or whatsoever even though it seemed like he was flirting with you for a brief moment.

“No, thank you”, he says, looking right into your eyes. The dark brown of his iris seems to pull you in, until you snap out of it after a few seconds. He pays and takes the bag from your hand. His gaze lingers on your form behind the apron you are wearing and you feel your breath hitch for a second.

Then the moment is over.

“Thank you for your kind consultation, Y/N.”, he says with a look at the tag on your shirt. At the mention of your name, you feel heat shooting through your body like he just set you on fire. Suddenly, you find it difficult to concentrate when he gives you one last look and leaves the store.

“DID GOD SEND US AN ANGEL TO GET 20 BATH BOMBS?!”, you hear June yell behind you.

“Who the hell was that, Y/N?”

“That was Seokjin and he wants to know what color they would produce all at once”, you answer like you’re in a trance.

“He WHAT- now?!”

For the next few days you try not to think about Seokjin too much. To tell the truth, you fail miserably. The main reason to that is certainly June who just won’t let go of the story, but if you are honest, you think about him as well. Even without her help. Seokjin piqued your interest and you want to know more about him.

You even start looking him up on social media in your work breaks but either he doesn’t have any public appearance or your fbi skills just aren’t good enough to find him.

The next week starts without any major events if you don’t count the old man who tries to eat a whole bar of shower soap and the middle-aged woman who just won’t understand the usage of a massage bar. After the third attempt of explaining she doesn’t need a lighter for the process, she just leaves and you try to stay calm. Suddenly, you hear someone call your name from behind.

“Hey, Y/N.”

You turn around and immediately feel like you’re not ready for the sight you’re greeted with. Seokjin is wearing a white, half-transparent shirt with long sleeves combined with skinny black pants.

They look too tight.

Your lungs feel tight too.

He even remembered your name. And how the hell are you fangirling over someone you only met once before?! A quick look around shows that both Nara and June are busy with customers so you pull yourself together and return his smile.

“Seokjin. How can I help you today?”

For a moment he looks a bit lost but quickly recovers.

“I loved how everything smelled the last time I was here, so I thought I’d get something else. You do sell shower gel, right?”

“Yeah, of course”, you say, turning around to get to the other side of the shop. While walking in front of him you try to relax your shoulders a bit.

Arriving at the shower themed area you try to get back to being professional again.

“Do you have anything special in mind? Maybe some ingredient you like?”, you ask him while scanning the stacks.

Your gaze comes to a halt when you spot a sign right next to his handsome face saying “prince charming”. Normally, you love the shower gel that is advertised, but right now you curse whoever chose its name. The real prince charming in front of you has the audacity to smirk at your irritation.

“I like products that smooth my skin when I’m in the shower”, he says looking you dead in the eye. “Maybe something that feels good when you apply it.”

You can’t do anything about it, the picture just appears in front of your inner eye. Seokjin standing in the shower, water floating over his shaped body. He rubs his damped skin with nourishing oils, his lips sinfully parted. His body looks perfect surrounded by the steam from the hot water. You visibly shudder.

“Are you cold?”, Seokjin asks, bringing you back to reality.

“N-No!”, you hastily say. Quickly, you grab a bar with a minty color from the shelf, showing it to him.

“What about this one? It’s really good for your skin, it’s based on natural ingredients.”

He leaves you completely stunned when he takes your hand into his, bringing the bar to his nose. His palm is soft and warm, embracing your small fingers with his. You feel like you float and the feeling tingles. Every inch of your body is on edge, not missing a single second of the moment. His touch is light and gentle, giving you the opportunity to pull away. Obviously, you don’t. Further, you don’t even breathe until he lets go of you again.

“Yeah, it smells nice", he says. "I’ll take it."

Your wobbly legs take the two of you to the checkout, where you wrap the soap bar.

“Do you work here every day?”, Seokjin asks you casually. “If you don’t mind answering”, he adds.

“I don’t”, you smile. “I work from Monday ‘til Thursday after my college courses.”

He looks impressed. “You study and work at the same time?”

You laugh at his expression. “Something has to pay the rent, right? Also working here is more fun than it looks like.”

“I mean, if you like working in a giant flower meadow, then yeah”, he jokes. “What’s your major though?”

“International Management”, you say sheepishly. “Probably not the most interesting- “

“Awesome!”, he exclaims. “I work in the management area myself, you know.”

“You do?” Secretly, you had put him into modeling or maybe he really was an angel like June had noted multiple times.

“I work at a small music label with some of my friends”, he explains further. “Maybe we could- “

You don’t get to hear what he wants to say.

“Y/N? Can you please go and help June? I swear to god if she touches that damn soap one more time, I’ll tie her hands behind her back!!”, Nara shouts at you from the other side of the store.

“I’m sorry.”

You and Seokjin both apologize at the same time.

“Here’s your recipe”, you smile and hand him the package with his purchase.

“It was nice talking to you Y/N”, Seokjin says, giving you one last look before leaving the store.

You look at his broad back longingly before rushing to get to June before Nara can live up to her promise.

On Friday, you start your day off with working on an essay for your finance course. After finishing a couple of pages, you get ready to meet June at the fairground. Apparently, her roommate works there, selling crêpes which are “not from this world, maybe even from another galaxy”, as June claims.

At the end of the day you wonder if you may have lost some of your sanity, because on the weekend you can’t stop thinking about Seokjin at all. The picture of him touching your hands and looking at you in such a deep way seems to be burned into your brain. You also start to ask yourself if he feels the same about you. He must have felt something the second time he went to buy the shower bar. At least you hope he did. Maybe you’re completely out of place and he was just being himself? It’s not only the girls who get mistaken when they’re just being super nice, you remind yourself.

You could ask him out the next time he buys something. If there is a next time. Or would that be unprofessional at your workplace?

Without finding a solution to your problem, you nervously wait for the next workday to arrive. Who doesn’t arrive though is the person in question. June comments on your stiffness a few times but other than that nothing happens the entire week. You’re exhausted from studying and working afterwards but most of all from wondering if you will meet Seokjin again.

The next Monday comes and goes while your hope slowly dies. On Tuesday, you’re stacking up some massage bars catching yourself daydreaming. You can see Seokjin right in front of you. He’s wearing a dark blue sweater that makes a great contrast to his skin tone and reminds you of a deep ocean.

Only then you realize that he is indeed standing right in front of you. You’re not dreaming, you’re staring and it’s getting damn awkward.

“Seokjin!”, you screech, quickly trying to change to professionalism again.

“Hi, Y/N”, he says, completely oblivious to your thoughts. He’s really here, you think, getting more and more excited. It’s as if someone just lifted a grey filter and every color gets brighter again.

He points at the bar in you hand. “What’s that?”

“That’s a massage bar”, you say, happy he picked a topic other than you ogling him. “It can be used for a massage or as a body lotion after showering. It contains cocoa butter and mineral oils.”

The shower image comes to your mind again but you quickly shove it back.

“Sounds lovely”, he says and for a split second his gaze falls to your lips. At least you think it does. Internally you take a deep breath, working up some courage. “Do you want to try it?”, you ask in a rush.

He looks surprised but quickly recovers, nodding and pulling up one sleeve. You’re greeted with the sight of his slender hand and the visible veins running down his arm. Holding back a shiver while taking his hand you softly rub some of the product onto his skin. Then you start massaging the back of his hand with gentle strokes. Your gaze lingers for a moment and your heart most definitely skips a beat when you look up again. All the angelic features of Seokjins face have vanished. His eyes are half closed and he looks almost sinful. A small noise escapes his parted lips and you think you might faint.

It feels exciting and intimidating to touch him like this.

In the middle of the store you’re working at.

For each and every one to see.

When the realization hits you, you drop his hand in embarrassment. His eyes snap open and he looks equally as shocked as you are. He takes a step back in the same moment you find your voice again.

“I’m sorry, do you- eh do you like the product? Should I pack it for you?”, you ask, trying to deescalate the situation.

“Huh?” Seokjin looks at you like he sees you for the first time today. “Ah no, thank you! I-I think I need to leave, actually.”

Before you can even do so much as blink, he rushes out of the door. You’re left with the massage bar in your hand and your heart at your feet. How come you didn’t notice it was involved until now? Why did he leave, did you do something wrong?

You feel like you’re about to cry but fight it successfully. Okay, maybe you did develop a crush on a customer. And maybe some part of you was convinced that it was mutual and Seokjin had a thing for you as well. Obviously, he had not.

The last time someone ran from you as fast as he did was at a fetching game in elementary school. Either way, now is definitely not the time to dive further into your feelings. While leading another customer through the store, June brushes your shoulder.

“What the hell did just happen?”, she whispers, keeping up her façade smile at the same time. You just shake your head, unable to answer because honestly you don’t know. Maybe you did cross a line but at the same time you felt like Seokjin had actually liked it.

The rest of the shift you work on auto-pilot. Your customer smile never fades but inside you feel empty. Even if you had interpreted every sign Seokjin gave you wrong, you felt as if there was a connection between the two of you. How could you be so false about that?

By the end of the day you feel exhausted, looking forward to crying in some of your pillows. Maybe there’s still ice cream left in your refrigerator. A miserable scene starts playing in your head and you quickly shake it off, as you finish cleaning the last counter.

“I’m heading home, okay?”, you exclaim, earning a thumbs up from Nara and a worried look from June. Luckily, she stays silent giving you the space you need right now. With your jacket and bag draped over one arm you leave the store. It’s dark outside but still pretty warm. Only a few people are out, most of them heading home as well now.

Maybe the rejection will hurt less in a few days, you think to yourself. Just as you turn around the corner, someone tall bumps into you. You squeak and jolt backwards when you realize who you just ran into. Seokjin. It had to be him out of all people. A thousand different thoughts cross your mind.

How do you react? What is he doing here? Did he come back to talk to you? Should you be angry at him?

Your stupid heart betrays you by skipping a beat and then starting a race in your chest. Still, it starts to hurt just as much when you hear his voice again.

“Y/N!” He seems to be just as surprised as you are. “Shit, I’m so sorry, are you okay?”

Even with a shocked look on his face he’s still gorgeous and you feel like crying again. Avoiding his gaze, you look down and realize that he’s waiting for an answer.

“Y-Yeah, I’m fine don’t worry.”

Even a total stranger would notice the shakiness of your voice. You really need to escape this situation. Now.

“Look, I’m okay. I’ll just head home now, so… have a great evening.”

You awkwardly try to shuffle past him but he catches your arm holding you back.

“No, please wait!”

He’s so close now that you can smell his cologne. Something really sweet mixed with soap that makes you want to get closer to him. Instead, you try to free yourself from his grip. You still don’t know why he left earlier and it hurts being near him.

“Let me go please, I need to- “

“Just listen to me, I swear I’ll make it quick!”, he interrupts you.

His voice sounds really desperate which is why you feel yourself slowly nod.

“I owe you an apology for what happened today.” After his first words the scene starts to play in your head again and you slightly stiffen at the memory.

“I’m really sorry that I just left like that. It wasn’t your fault at all, I was just- you know I- shit this is embarrassing.” He sighs, stumbling over his own words.

By now you’re even more confused than before.

“I don’t understand”, you say. “Why did you leave?”

Seokjin runs a hand through his hair. You can see that he’s frustrated but you don’t know why.

“Ah, fuck it”, he mutters under his breath and then looks right into your eyes.

“The first time I came to the store, it was because I lost a bet with my friends”, he admits in a rush. “I felt stupid and embarrassed, but you were so nice and extremely cute so the next time I came, it was because I wanted to see you again.”

The world stops spinning. At least you feel like it does, because you’re suddenly out of air after his confession. He came to see you?

Not noticing any of this, Seokjin continues.

“I know, it may sound really creepy, I realize that, but you seemed to be having a good time as well, so I figured you felt the same?” At this he pushed his fingers through his hair again. It’s an irritating gesture because you know you shouldn’t stare at them like you do right now.

A tiny part of you wishes he would touch you instead.

“One time I almost asked you out, but we got interrupted and I lost my courage, I guess. And when I saw how shocked you were today after what happened, I just thought that I completely misinterpreted everything. I didn’t want you to feel pressured if you really don’t feel the same, that’s why I left. So- yeah, I realize now that I probably acted like an idiot. I’m sorry.”

“You were an idiot, that’s true.”

Seokjin looks startled.

Gaining courage, you openly smile at him.

“I feel the same about you”, you softly say. “Talking to you is so easy, I feel like I could do it all day. I’m sorry I reacted like this back in the store, I just remembered where we were and you’re a customer…I panicked.”

You take a deep breath.

“And when you left, I felt devastated. One moment you’re there and it’s going great and we're touching and the next second you run off. It just hurt…” Your last words are only a whisper escaping your lips.

At some point during your confession, Seokjin decided to take a step closer, now standing only inches away from you and his scent is all around you again.

“So, you liked touching me?”, he asks with a small smirk on his lips. Those beautiful pink lips you want to feel so badly. You quickly nod, heat rushing through your cheeks.

“And Y/N”, he says while moving the last bit closer. “Do you feel like panicking right now?”

“I don’t think so. “

His lips are on yours in an instant. Everything becomes less important to the feeling of Seokjin kissing you. It’s as if the whole world went silent at once just so you won’t get interrupted.

When his thumb starts caressing your cheek, you part your lips, giving him access to your mouth. His tongue plays with your lower lip before licking into you softly. He tastes amazing and you feel yourself getting lost, when he suddenly pulls away.

“This is okay, right?” he asks, panting heavily.

Instead of answering, you pull him in again. This time it’s different though. The first kiss was sweet and new. This one is pure hunger. You feel your skin burn where he touches you on top of your shirt. In return, you let your hands wander beneath his blue sweater, tracing his skin with your fingers. Seokjin growls against your mouth.

He then starts to tilt your head so he can bring his lips to your neck. And boy, he knows what he’s doing. His lips place wet kisses on your sensible skin and when he starts sucking right below your ear, a tiny moan escapes your lips. At this you push lightly against his chest. Again, this is sadly not the right place. You’re still out on a street.

He takes the hint and stops kissing you. His lips look swollen and wet and you have to force yourself not to kiss him again. He opens his mouth, possibly to say anything including some stupid apology, but you quickly take his hand.

“Let’s continue this some place else. Maybe somewhere without an audience?”, you suggest.

Seokjin laughs, visibly relieved and starts pulling you into the direction he originally came from.

His voice seems darker than before. “I live right around the corner, we can go there.”

You hum in approval, not missing the fact that he doesn’t let go of your hand.

On the way to his apartment you keep up a small chat about some of your courses and the work Seokjin does. Still, you can feel the tension in the air between you. On the outside you maintain interested, when all you can think about is his skin against yours.

Finally, you arrive in front of a small building with a blue painted wooden door. Seokjin fumbles with his keys while you can only look at his beautiful hands. You crave his touch and the feeling of being in his arms. The door opens and he pulls you inside. A staircase later you’re in front of the apartment door.

“I do have a roommate, but he’s out of town at the moment”, he explains while unlocking the door. Inside the hall you don’t even get time to look at the furniture before Seokjin pushes you against the wall.

“God, you’re so beautiful”, he whispers right before he kisses you again.

His lips are rough, and you meet them with the same amount of hunger. After all, you missed them since the last touch. You can feel his hands on the back of your thighs when he suddenly lifts you up without missing a beat. His mouth is still working against yours but now you’re just too aware of a certain hardness between your legs that shoots heat through your spine.

You feel yourself getting wet and pray that he won’t notice.

When Seokjin flips his thumb over your hard nipple you can hardly hold back a moan. He searches for permission in your face and upon finding it, pulls your shirt over your head. He’s met with the sight of a mint green bralette hugging your breasts. When he’s teasing you again over the fabric, you’re forced to close your eyes, moaning his name in pleasure.

The next thing you feel is his mouth engulfing your nipple. It’s hot and wet and you automatically arch your back to get closer to the feeling. He swirls his tongue around you, drawing soft noises from your throat.

“Please don’t stop”, you beg while pulling at some soft strands of his hair.

“You’re driving me crazy, Y/N”, he admits. “I can’t wait to feel you.”

“Then don’t”, you simply say, tugging at the hem of his sweater. He complies, pulling it off and you gasp lightly at the sight of his naked torso. Your fingers trail down the lines of his shoulders and your lips connect again, this time it’s sweet and full of anticipation.

You can feel the wall behind you vanish as Seokjin starts walking towards his bedroom, never breaking the kiss. He lays you down on his bed as if you were made of glass and starts taking off your jeans in the same movement.

“Come and sit here, will you?”, he says.

You do as you’re told and when you meet his eyes again, you forget how to breathe. Seokjin is on his knees right in front of you, his black pants hanging loosely on his hips, his dark hair messy from your hands. You don’t even think he looks human anymore.

“Open your legs for me, princess.”

The new nickname makes you shiver, as well as the cold air meeting your wet panties as you comply. The man in front of you uses a long, slender finger to tug your underwear to the side and is rewarded with the sight of your glistening folds.

“You’re so wet princess, is this all for me?”

You moan as a response, unable to form a proper word in your head. No one has ever made you feel like this before.

Seokjin lowers his head and you lose every train of thoughts when you feel his tongue on you.

He licks up a stripe and your legs tremble out of pleasure. He starts sucking on your clit, leaving you a moaning mess, your hands grasping the sheets so you won’t lose balance.

Your breath hitches as Seokjin introduces a single digit to your entrance. His other hand is still holding you in place, while he works you up simultaneously with his tongue and finger. He starts pumping in and out faster, hitting your soft walls with every push. You’re on the edge, all you can think of is more, more.

“P-Please”, you say, breathing heavily. “I want to feel your cock inside of me. I need you. Now.”

He looks at you like you’re the most beautiful thing he has ever seen.

“You think you can take me, princess?”, he asks while getting up.

You nod a bit nervous at the sight of Seokjin taking off his pants and boxers at once. He’s way bigger than you had imagined. Like the rest of his body even his cock looks perfectly shaped, his tip already wet with a few drops of precum. You bite your bottom lip, can’t help but stare at him in awe. It’s the first time you see him completely naked and you try to take everything in at the same time.

Seokjin starts to crawl above you, keeping eye contact while you shuffle back until you hit the bedside. He pulls you down again by your legs, bringing his lips to your ear.

“I keet imagining this moment since the first time we met. Your hands all over me, while I pound you into the mattress until you scream my name”, he whispers.

Your answer is a kiss. On his lips you can taste yourself, mixed with the same impatience you feel building up inside of you. You reach down, slipping a finger over the head of his cock, bringing it back up to your mouth. Seokjin looks like he’s about to choke. Next thing you know, your panties are abandoned and he’s rolling a condom on himself that just appeared out of nowhere.

“Look at me while I fill you up so good”, he demands as he positions himself at your entrance. You both sigh at the feeling of him entering you inch by inch. He pauses when he’s completely inside of you.

“How can you be so tight? Your little pussy was made for me, right princess?”

You feel your cheeks get red, but there is no time to be ashamed of anything.

When he starts moving, you can feel how big he really is with every push. Seokjin flips at your nipple again before his mouth is on yours again and your soft moans get mixed with needy whines. His left hand is stroking your curves, coming to a halt at your hip, to keep you in place while he starts to go deeper.

His lips find your neck and you mewl loudly when he bites down on it. The next second the short pain is gone as he licks over the hickey he just created.

All of the sudden, he lowers his pace and you feel him even more, stretching you out deliciously. With a small movement, he starts to hit you at a specific angle, still going slow and making you feel him all the way.

He presses light kisses behind your ear, whispering “You’re fucking gorgeous Y/N”.

And then you feel his hand between your legs.

Seokjin stops kissing you to look at your face as he starts stimulating your clit with his fingers while moving faster again. You moan uncontrollably at the pleasure that takes over you.

“P-Please!”, you choke out.

“What is it princess? You need to use your words. Tell me what you need.”

His hot breath is on your face. Never in your life has anyone made you feel so precious and vulnerable at the same time.

“Please, S-Seokjin! Make me cum, I need you!”, you whine, while he proceeds to push you to the edge with every hard plunge of his cock.

“Say my name again, princess, I’ll make you feel so good!” His clenched teeth tell you that he’s not far from coming himself. His fingers and the feeling of him bouncing in and out of you almost make you faint.

“Seokjin!”, you cry out and your world shatters as the orgasm rips through you. A few pushes after, you feel Seokjin spill himself into the condom.

You’re both painting heavily when he rolls off of you and you feel his gaze from the side.

You turn your head, giving him a soft smile and the look, he rewards you with, makes your face heat up again.

“I think that was the best sex I ever had”, you admit sheepishly, holding your breath for a few seconds before releasing it again.

Seokjin smiles his angelic smile and brushes a sweaty strand of hair behind your ear.

“Me too.”

For a moment you both remain silent. Then he clears his throat.

“I hope this isn’t too late, but I really meant what I said before. Will you go out with me Y/N?”

“Yes”, you say wholeheartedly. “I would love to. There’s only one last question I have.”

“And that is?”, he asks with a confused look.

“What color did that bathtub have at the end? You know, the one where you put all the bath bombs together?”

“Y/N, I swear to god…”, he says and the rest of the sentence is drowned out by your laughter.

© Bts-Storys, 2021. Do not copy or repost without permission.

A/N: Thank you so much for reading all of it! I'm still working on my smut writing skills, I hope you can see some improvement.

[boop-le-snoot]

masterpost • main masterlist • taglist & faq

previously on...

Chapter 1! Reader's job has no chill and Wanda means well (Tony does too), but, as we know, the road to Hell is paved with good intentions. Reader discovers the source of some peculiar things and can't help but be overcome with curiosity. F-bombs galore!

Fun fact: this story's main soundtrack is Claire de Lune, for some reason. Usually I can't stand classical music.

I didn't anticipate my first day at the bodega to be remarkful in any way but I was quickly proven wrong. My expectations were low: few customers, some of them flat-earthers of the garden variety, perhaps one or two of those 'witches' from social media blogging platforms and an overzealous Satanist or two, since I was pretty sure I saw an Ouija board and a silver pentagram hanging in Odette's office on the day of the interview.

Boy was I wrong.

We averaged a customer every fifteen minutes with each person requesting increasingly strange items: healing quartz and sage were on the closer end of normal; I felt like I had teleported to Hogwarts and was now attending Professor Snape's Advanced Potions class, having to race between the high shelves and memorize the exact location of each and every ingredient. In the end, I sacrificed a few dollars and bought one of the beautiful, leather-bound notebooks off Odette to write down the shelf and position number for the most commonly requested items and planned to begin memorizing them at home.

There's a little bit of Ravenclaw in all of us, I supposed. My curiosity only extended further: sometimes, a haggard looking person would come up and declare they had an appointment with Odette and was quickly whisked away by my boss to her office, coming out looking slightly less haggard in about half an hour or so.

I adapted to the routine fairly quickly, choosing to make my personal peace with the strange customers and Odette's mysterious meetings: after all, I got the job because I needed money - who was I to judge her for doing Tarot readings and spiritual séances for an extra dollar?

The bodega's atmosphere did grow on me rather quickly, as I had thought it would. It was warm and homely even on the rainiest afternoons, there was an unlimited supply of herbal tea, free of charge, and I grew to appreciate it just like I learned to find the positives in my job at the café. That remained a constant, mildly interesting affair too - my regulars, especially the superheroes, had started coming in during the morning hours and we were able to resume our chit-chats without a hitch.

Wanda still fished for my most recent, memorable reading and Dr. Banner left his incomprehensible scribbles on every napkin within an arm's reach for me to return to him on his next visit. The fully grown man with multiple PhDs didn't fail to blush like a schoolgirl every single time it happened, causing Mr. Stark to double on his own salacious jokes, should the engineer have had come with. They often came together, blabbering things I couldn't even fathom understanding even with the help of Google.

"Penny for your thoughts?" Wanda sounded surprisingly chipper for it was freaking seven in the morning.

I blanched, banging my arm against the display door painfully with a softly muttered, "Fuck!".

The witch frowned. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah," I muttered, hoping my face wasn't portraying the mixture of confusion and fear that I felt. "Something weird happened at my other job yesterday, I'm still processing," I replied honestly, looking to the side.

In fairness, I didn't know what to think. The situation wasn't something that should have shocked me, with aliens and magic people an abundance in NYC, but seeing it with my own two eyes had been jarring.

A limping, paranoid young man had arrived for an appointment with Odette shortly before closing time; I had escorted him to her office without as much as a blink, only noticing he was dripping oddly colored blood when the door behind him had closed. I cleaned it up, dead set on confronting Odette about the obviously injured person - the blood, it was more of an attempt to clean it, since it merely stuck to the rag, refusing to wash off it with water or any of the organic cleaning solutions kept under the sink.

I had to leave the rag in a paper bag, acutely aware of the fact it could not have belonged to a normal person. My best guess was that a man was a mutant - NYC had plenty of them living behind a blue wall. Odette's office wasn't soundproof: I heard a pained yelp and then a vocalisation of relief as whatever was causing the man to bleed had been removed. In a few minutes while I was closing the cash register, he came out looking almost brand new - and as I paid him a more careful look, he was missing his scleras, leaving his eyes to look slightly terrifying.

And then he winked at me, a surprisingly human, boyish gesture - the smile that crawled up my face was purely automatic. I was sure it looked frozen. He disappeared without a word as Odette herself emerged from the backrooms, a tired sheen to her brow.

"Did you manage to clean up?" She asked, eyebrows raised at the lack of stains on the hardwood floors.

"It stuck to the rag," I replied, eyeing her warily. "The rag is in the unmarked bag next to the sink. I didn't know what else to do with it."

"Sometimes it does that," her sigh was very telling. This was to be expected to become a regular occurrence. She motioned for the notebook I got to keep track of everything in the store, rattling off a recipe for a cleaner and solvent combo, made purely from the items she had inside the store, giving me stern instructions to add the ingredients in the exact order I was told. I sighed but added the footnote. Odette was a far cry from the greasy git from Hogwarts so she deserved the benefit of the doubt at least.

I didn't dare to ask any more questions about the strange man; not that day, not after I had suprised Wanda with a quick recap of my story. It's not like I had anything against mutants - as long as they were peaceful and didn't harm humans with their abilities, I was content to co-habit, share my space and even be friends with them. A very nice old lady who came by three times a week had gills peeking out of the top of her turtleneck and she was just the most polite, sweetest thing.

Wanda's curiosity was understandable and not suspicious in any way: I was under the impression she was a mutant, too, along with her twin brother - so the feeling of dread that blossomed within me as soon as the two suited figures entered the small store I attributed to the larger size of the man and vulture eyes of the woman. They both appeared extremely out of place with their black two-pieces and badly hidden pistol holsters, topped off with badges I couldn't take a good look at without losing my customer service facade.

I decided to play it dumb, self-conscious of the thudding of my heart in my ribcage. My body screamed 'danger' at me. "Hello, how can I help you?"

The woman cast an observant look over me, my plain clothes, lingering on my star-patterned scarf and matching hair band. "Are you the owner of this store?"

"No," I frowned, not liking where this was going. "Do you have an appointment with Odette?"

"We'd like to see her," the man pointedly moved his arm, exposing the gun and the badge.

I dropped the nice act, staring him down in earnest. I never liked self-righteous, pushy government officials; even less so, when they didn't follow protocol and started the conversation with demands instead of proper introductions. As I shot a quick text to Odette, noting that there were 'strange people in uniform' looking for her, my suspicions were only confirmed when the woman looked around the store with eyes that knew what they were looking for. Those two definitely weren't cops or even feds, they were straight up shady.

Odette all but flew to the bodega, the imposing, suffocating aura I'd seen only once on full display. It was hard to breathe standing so close to her; with muted satisfaction, I noticed both agents squirm, their fingers twitching, as they took in shuddering inhales through their, undoubtedly, lying mouths.

The whole spectacle was over quickly. I had managed to serve and quickly usher out Ike, one of the Satanists (yes, we did, in fact, have a few of those as regulars) with his paper bag full of powdered goat horn and a fresh cat skull under his armpit before the curtains parted and the two agents left without saying a word. I thought their eyes looked - wrong, like glass marbles, dull, lifeless and unseeing.

Odette dismissed my worries with a frivolously waved hand: "They won't be bothering us anytime soon," closing the door to her office - it reeked of strong incense and horseradish, for some reason. Like she'd been making some hell salad in front of the two nosy officials.

I took a deep breath in and then a deep breath out. The weirdness should've bothered me more, I knew, but I couldn't bring myself to decide whether I wanted to know what that interaction was actually about or live in blissful ignorance, where my boss might be some sort of a mutant or an actual witch that helps other mutants.

The longer I thought about it, the louder anti-mutant propaganda articles screamed at me: children being killed or abandoned because one day, they woke up and could fly or move things with their mind; every potential situation could end up like Carrie or Brightburn - two movies so blatantly obvious in their point to instill fear against children that could grow to work alongside Earth's Mightiest Defenders.

Needless to say, my conscious calmed down pretty quickly. I had felt the hairs on my nape stand up as soon as the agents entered the room and in my experience, a reaction like that was never good. I had been taught to trust my gut.

Odette had cancelled her visits for the day, holing up in her office as the whole store rapidly filled up with the stench of horseradish, old blood and sage. The occasional noise came from the office, interrupted by mumbling, and I was quickly told to just turn up the old, vintage radio if it bothered me.

I was too busy taking in the contents of her office - the table that previously stood in the far end of it, stood in the middle, folded out into the shape of a circle. Something was drawn on it, something the color of dried blood, and there were light candles, white and blue, littered on almost every possible surface. The air was clouded with incense smoke, so thick, it made my eyes water.

Odette's grin was sardonic as she met my eyes, wide and shocked, that had previously landed on what looked like a pot- or a cauldron, emanating the strongest bitter stench that wafted even through the lead curtain of incense. No wonder the whole store reeked.

Before she gently shut the door in my face, I caught the centerfold of the whole show - an extremely large, tattered, leatherbound tome with yellowed pages and a heavy metal padlock laying next to it. Overcome by stupor, I didn't manage to make out the intricate silver letters on its cover.

Needless to say, walking home that day was an adventure. In part, I was cautious that the agents would find me, follow me home, interrogate me - I've never been arrested even by usual cops and it was unlikely that shady government agencies were delicate in their approach. A larger part of my brain was wondering about the implications of what I had seen, I'd nearly chewed off my fingernails remembering the vacant, lost face expressions on the agents' faces.

As soon as I got home, I set to do some serious googling. And find information, I did. Plethora of minor details - candle colors, herbs used, deeply individual incantations and mythical deities that chose to work with a particular witch. It was nothing short of a whole science; I'd go as far as to say it was a complete lifestyle. The use of magick bled into every aspect of daily life, from sleep to food to communication with others.

Part of me felt incredulity at the implication of sacrificing so much to get results that might be the opposite of the ones desired. A larger, braver part of me - the very same that used to push me to explore abandoned buildings with my friends and drink booze given by a stranger - admired the work and the dedication my boss and her kind put into their work.

Having received my first paycheck and successfully having made it through rent day without having to make excuses, my conscious allowed me to treat myself to a few items - I decided to give into my curiosity and placed an order for a few books on modern witchcraft, happily waiting for the package to arrive next afternoon. I went to sleep with my head full and a new world at my feet to explore.

The books were late - or more like, never showed. The refund couldn't come soon enough. My curiosity began to reach unbearable levels the longer I worked the front desk at Odette's. These days I didn't need much assistance anymore, ready to help any new or returning customer with the help of my notebook. Time after time, I noticed a certain working order, a pattern to things if you may - and was able to recommend a few things here and there. In short, I stepped over my initial apprehension and dove into the world of natural remedies and energetic manipulation headfirst.

It made all the sense that Odette would start to take absence from the bodega as my training progressed. On the days she had fewer or no appointments, she would don her favourite scarf and trot out the front door, large purse in tow, to run errands or restock on the rare, pricy items that couldn't get delivered directly to the shop. I'd grown accustomed to locking up on my own; the spare key to the entrance door was my pride and joy, the dull silver a warm comfort hanging on a chain around my neck. Its antique design made a fairly pretty necklace.

The customer coming to pick up a special order hardly disrupted my time. I had Janis Joplin blaring from the old radio, my skirt swayed to the rhythm of the song together with me. The elevated mood while working in the shop was something I appreciated fully - with a kind smile, I departed for the backrooms to search for the package with the customer's name, not finding it anywhere near the proper place. A call later, I was opening Odette's office and extracting the paper-wrapped shoebox from the fridge, passing it into the customer's arms with utmost care: 'FRAGILE. KEEP REFRIGERATED AT ALL TIMES.' read on it in Odette's sharp cursive.

The bell above the door rang as the woman departed but I was already inching behind the curtain, overcome by sudden inquisitiveness.

The book. It stood right in the middle of Odette's desk, shut, but missing its padlock, beckoning with the thick gothic letters spelling out 'PRACTICAL ALCHEMY'. I noticed it as soon as I stepped into the office, confused and puzzled by my own unbearable desire to approach it immediately. I knew something was amiss, yet, my legs had a mind of their own and my hands firmly placed themselves upon the heavy cover of the book, seemingly without the input from my brain.

"What the hell..." I muttered to myself, finding the books contents to be - for the lack of a better word - peculiar. "Protect a babe born on all Hallows Eve..." I numbly mouthed the first words that my eyes registered. The pages made a soft noise as my shaking fingers turned them, one after the other. "Bestow healing upon a barren womb... Punish a thief..." There were - spells, and potions, and so many plants I've never even heard about before.

The pages turned and handwritings changed - at the start, words were written out precisely, the cursive neat and sharp, obviously written by an ink pen. Some things were scribbles, pencil or charcoal, so barely intelligible I had to guess about a third of the words written. Towards the end of the book pages made with a typewriter appeared - blocky letters and numbers, language modern, ash and cigarette smell coming from the paper.

I couldn't believe what I was seeing. The longer my hands touched the pages, the stronger the tingling sensation became - I failed to notice it at first, attributing it to the exhilaration of finding something so strange yet so precious, but as I was finishing a page that contained a fairly short spell for protection of a witches' home, the discomfort of my palms rose into a mild stinging pain.

"Fuck," I yelped, casting a look at my fingers. They were hot, angry, as if I had briefly touched boiling oil - and the skin on my fingertips began to blister, little white pustules forming where I had gingerly held the pages of the book in place. "What the fuck?" Was my reasonable question to nobody in particular.

The books contents were, no doubt, interesting but I was more concerned with the state of my hands - had I ignored the pain for five more minutes, I might have had to go to the hospital to treat what was beginning to look like a second-degree burn. I slammed it shut none-too-gently, placing it exactly as I found it and winced when barely a second of touching it brought on more excruciating pain.

The healing peppermint oil salve I knew people bought for mild burns only soothed the initial sting, so I had to suffer until I clocked out, stopping by a drugstore on my way home to purchase some much-needed burn cream. And while it didn't make it worse, I knew that my next day at work was going to be Hell.

Most thankful, however, I was to my voice-to-text option on my cell. Not only it allowed me to communicate with my friends without hurting my abused skin even more, but it also dutifully saved the short, simple spell that was supposed to protect my house. There was no harm in trying it, I supposed, after seeing what I didn't doubt was the book's own protection wreak havoc on my snoopy little hands.

The tag list is open until the story is finished.

@couldntbedamned @mikariell95 @letsby @sleep-i-ness @toomanyrobins @mostly-marvel-musings @persephonehemingway @schemefrenzy @lillsxd @bluecrazedandbeautiful @slothspaghettiwrites

[sylphid187]

Coming Home, Taking Flight ‐ Chapter 2: Road to Osaka

This Chapter 2 of my fic focusing on Hinata's journey home. A look into Hinata's return to Japan, his interactions with his friends, and how he makes it into the MSBY Black Jackals.

Hinata Shoyou wakes up religiously the next morning. He gets up, goes for a morning jog, gets some yoga in his routine, then makes time for morning meditation. He makes sure to do all this, before heading to the kitchen to make some breakfast for his family. 

He spent most of yesterday and last night catching up with his family and friends, who had to leave late in the night, after they realized that the sun was down and Tsukishima still had to drive Yachi and Yamaguchi home. During dinner, Shouyou had spent blissful time with his family, his mother seemingly very happy about having the returning presence of her eldest, back in their household. He is reminded again how being back in the company of his family in their own home, was so comforting. 

He walks around their kitchen and, as he waits for the rice to finish cooking, he goes into the fridge to find some salmon slices and some tofu. Shouyou smiles and figures that he probably has enough ingredients to make a healthy japanese breakfast with the salmon, and he's sure his mom has enough ingredients to make some miso soup to go with the meal. He smiles as he is reminded of how he fiddled around in hisbshared space with Pedro, and how Shouyou would usually make breakfast for his roommate, before going to wake him so they could enjoy a meal together. 

As much as Shouyou wanted to treat his family to some brazillian recipes he'd learned from Nice, he didn't have enough ingredients for it right now. So he promises himself he'd do that another day. He'd be more than happy to share the other culture that he's grown to love, with the one that he grew up with. 

Later, when Shouyou is just about finished with setting up the table and their morning meal, he hears padded footsteps make their way through their dining area, and is sure that it's Natsu that's making her way to the kitchen. He hears a gasp and looks up to find that he's guessed right, and Natsu is there staring at their table. 

"Wow Nii-chan, this looks great!" she claps her hands together in glee and continues to scan over what Shouyou has made. 

"Thanks Natsu! Hope you like it! I packed one for mom so she can take it with her to work." Shouyou smiled. His mother still worked on the weekends, and she was used to laboring hard as a single mother. She had worked hard her whole life to sustain Shouyou and Natsu. Shouyou hopes that his dreams of going pro wouldn't just be a benefit to him, but would help lighten the load on his family too. 

"It really does look good! I can't wait to dig in!" Natsu clasps her hands together again, before heading to the sink to wash them, and sitting down at her usual spot on the table. 

Shouyou then sits across from her, and they both give thanks before beginning to dig in. Natsu immediately gives out a happy squeal after a few bites, and Shouyou can't help but chuckle at his sister's antics. He's extremely pleased though that she seems to genuinely like his food. "Nii-chan! This is so good! It looked great, but it tastes even better." 

Shouyou grins. "Flattery will get you nowhere Natsu, but thank you. I'm really happy you like it." 

"It's a real shame you won't be staying longer Nii-chan. I wouldn't mind eating more of your cooking. You're leaving this afternoon right?" she asks him with a smile. 

"That's right. I'll leave by noon, sorry I won't be able to spend more time with you and mom. And I just got home too." Shouyou states, a little gloomy at the thought. 

It saddens him a bit that he can't spend more time with his family, just after he's gotten back. But Shouyou cut it really close when he chose to fly back yesterday. He couldn't book earlier flights because he also wanted to maximize spending time with Pedro, Heitor, Nice and Coach. That, and he did promise to wait after Heitor and Nice's wedding.  But, he needed to be home in time to make it to tryouts. Granted, his chosen flight really didn't give him much time for any detours. Tryouts were on Monday, and today was Saturday. The plan was to head out Saturday afternoon to Osaka via train. 

The train ride from Miyagi to Higashiosaka in Osaka was about nine hours. He had planned to leave around noon to get to Osaka by 10pm. He still had to find a place to stay, but he figured he would work it out when he got there. He could, of course, leave on a Sunday. But Shouyou wanted to have enough time to familiarize himself with the area before tryouts, and have at least a little bit of time to get in shape while waiting for the day to arrive. He didn't want to show up to Osaka not knowing where he was headed and end up missing tryouts because he got lost. With this, he'd at least have a full day to go around the area. 

"Don't apologize to us for following your dreams, Shouyou." The two look to the sound of the voice, to find their mother there with a smile on her face. "We support you, always remember that. And whenever you're having a hard day and need to come home, we'll be here to welcome you back." 

"Mama..." Shouyou smiles. He really was very lucky, and he will never tell himself otherwise. 

"That's right Nii-chan! And I can't wait to tell my friends and teammates all about you when you make the team!" Natsu says as she shoves another piece of fish in her mouth. 

"Natsu! I told you I have to make the team first. There's definitely tons of competition for a spot on the team." He contemplates on this. He's both nervous and excited for tryouts, but he will definitely be doing his best, no matter who his competition is. 

Their mother goes to the countertop and picks up the lunch Shouyou made and smiles at her son. "Oh believe me, you'll make it." 

"Mama! Not you too! I don't wanna be overconfident about it." 

"Shouyou, I'm not saying it because of any other reason, but because I truly believe that you'll make it." She goes over to him and pats his head. "It doesn't matter to me how old you and Natsu ever grow up to be. I will always be your number one fan. And you always remember one thing, I am so very proud of you." 

" Thank you." Shouyou feels like crying, but he stops himself and opts for a wide smile instead. "I'll definitely ace tryouts, you'll see. I'll make sure they notice me."

"Yes you will!" Natsu chimes in. 

"I know you will." She thanks him for the meal he's made for her before kissing both kids on the cheek and making her way to the door. "By the way Shouyou, are your things packed for later?" 

"Yep! I made sure I had everything before going to sleep last night." He says with a proud smile. "I might end up leaving a little earlier though. I want to make sure I catch the train on time." 

This makes their mother stop in her tracks, and Natsu snicker. "Shouyou, did you think you were taking the train?" 

Shouyou is confused. "Yes? I mean, how else am I supposed to get to Osaka?" he asks as he tilts his head to the side. 

"Natsu." 

Natsu grins "Don't worry about it mama. Nii-chan will find out later anyway. So everyone agreed to keep quiet about it." 

"Keep quiet about what?" Shouyou asks again as he looks between them both. "Am I missing something?"

"It's a surprise." And what a surprise it was. 

 ---

Shouyou was just grabbing his things and about to head out the door, Natsu following behind him. "Nii-chan I really think you should wait a bit." 

"Sorry Natsu, if I wait any longer I might miss my train!" He ruffled her hair affectionately and continued "Take good care of mama while I'm away, okay?" 

"Nii-chan wait!" Natsu tries to grab Shouyou as he opens the door, but misses. He slides their door open and comes face to face with none other than Kozume Kenma and Kuroo Tetsurou. 

Shouyou blinks. And then again. And again. "Kenma-nii! Kuroo-nii! You made it just in time." he hears Natsu speak from behind him. 

"Yo, chibi-chan! What's up?" Kuroo's personality hasn't changed at least, Shouyou thinks. 

"Wha...what are you guys doing here?!" Shouyou gasps, as he looks over at the newcomers. 

"Shouyou." He looks over to Kenma who is smiling at him. "I'd like to think you owe me a better greeting than that." 

"Yeah, that's kinda hurtful chibi-chan. After we came all the way here to take you to Osaka." Kuroo says with a grin as he slings his arm around Kenma's shoulder. 

" You're taking me to Osaka?!" Shouyou exclaims again in shock. 

Kenma sighs, a small smile still on his face. He dislodges himself from Kuro’s hold and goes to envelope Shouyou in a hug. It takes a moment, but Shouyou relaxes and immediately hugs back. "Welcome home Shouyou." 

Shouyou feels someone ruffling his hair and he opens his eyes to see Kuroo there with a smile. "Glad to have you back Chibi-chan" 

He feels Kenma let go, and the gamer finally stands back to take a good look at Shouyou after all this time. "You look good." 

"Thanks Kenma! You too!" He grins. 

"Should I be jealous?" Kuroo asks with a smirk as he watches them, but one look from Kenma shuts him up as he raises his hand in resignation. He chuckles and shakes his head, allowing the two to continue talking.  

"You've changed too." Kenma continues as he grins. "I can't wait to see what else you're gonna do Shouyou." 

"If you get boring, I'll drop you."  

Shouyou ends up giving out a nervous laugh as he remembers Kenma's words from back then, just when Kenma offered to become his sponsor. But deep down, he knows that Kenma has only ever done everything he could to help Shouyou, and that was said in jest...probably. The former Nekoma setter was just really fascinated with him, for some reason. 

"As much as I love the touching reunion, we have to move folks. It's a 10 hour drive to Osaka!" Kuro exclaims as he pats their backs. 

Kuro and Kenma both begin to help Shouyou and Natsu bring the former's things to the car. While they're loading up, Shouyou continues to say thanks to his friends for taking the time to bring him to  their destination. "I really appreciate it you guys, thank you. I was fine with taking the train though!" 

Kenma scrunches his face in disapproval and replies "There's no way we'd let you take the train, not when we had the time to pick you up ourselves." 

"I hope you guys didn't put off anything important." he tells them. He knows how busy Kenma has been, as he's regularly kept in touch in Brazil. 

"I can manage Shouyou, don't worry too much about it." Kenma says with a wave of his hand. 

"What Kenma means to say, is that if he had it his way, he would have been the one to pick you up from the airport too. Unfortunately, he lost at a game of rock-paper-scissors to Tsukki and had to give the airport pickup to them. And he also wants you to know that he finished all his workload early to make sure we were free when you got here. So don't you worry about it." Kuroo says as he shuts the trunk and dusts his hands. He looks over at the two with a large grin before he feels someone lightly punch his side. 

Kenma gives Kuroo a glare and then another playful shove. "Just get in the car before I decide to leave you here Kuro." 

"Awww you'd never do that kitten." Kenma stares at Kuro with a piercing gaze, and Shouyou thinks if looks could kill, that was it. "Annndd I'll be quiet now. Come on chibi-chan! let's get you to Osaka!" 

Natsu waves at them animatedly as they all get in the car. She lets out a loud "Keep safe!" as they drive away from the Hinata household and begin their 10 hour car ride. 

The ride begins similarly to that of yesterday, filled with catching up and updates on how everyone else has been doing. Shouyou has had little contact with the former Nekoma team, with the exception of Kenma and Kuroo. This wasn't for the lack of trying either, but he’s only ever occasionally spoken to Inouka and Lev, and that's during one or two video calls during a day off. It isn't a surprise to him that team Nekoma have all worked their way up the ladder as they grew up, and even through their success, continued to stay connected within their own circle. Kenma and Kuroo themselves regularly spoke to all their former teammates and told Shouyou much of how they were all doing. 

"Waaah! I've heard from Lev about his modeling career! I didn't know he'd become such a big name in Russia." he exclaims excitedly. 

"Lev is still Lev. He might look pristine and proper in the photos, but he's just as loud as ever." Kenma says with a sigh, as if just talking about Lev was tiring him out. 

Kuroo guffaws. "At least he's mellowed down some because of Yaku." 

Shouyou tits his head "Are they?" 

Kuroo looks at him from the rearview mirror and smiles. "We can neither confirm nor deny, I'm afraid. Neither of them have said anything, but Yaku's sent us photos of them together. It's pretty common at this point, ever since Yakkun's been playing for the Russian V-League." 

"We hear he plans to come back though. There's some talk that they've begun to scout for players fit for the Japanese volleyball olympic team, and Yaku wants to be here and play for Japan." Kenma states, as he begins to fiddle with what seems like a new game console. 

"Ah yeah! Bokuto's been excited about that too. But he wants the Jackals to win this season first and finally kill the Alder's winning streak." Kuro tells them with a smirk. "And you know, they might actually be able to if you make it on the team chibi-chan." 

"Ahaha...well I'll definitely make sure to make an impression during tryouts." Shouyou says. "I can't wait to see Bokuto-san on Monday! I wonder if he'll be watching tryouts?" 

"From what Bo tells me, Coach Foster is requiring them to watch this year. He wants the whole team's opinion on getting a new player." Kuro replies. 

"Shouyou, what do you mean by seeing Bokuto on Monday?" Kenma immediately asks, putting his game down and turns to look at Shouyou. 

"Eh? I mean, I won't be seeing him till tryouts." Shouyou reiterates with a tilt of his head, when else would he find the time to see Bokuto-san? 

"Wait chibi-chan, aren't you going to..." Kuro doesn't get to finish. 

"Shouyou, where in Osaka are you staying? Sorry, we forgot to ask earlier." Kenma asks him. 

"Oh! Sorry, my bad. I was wondering if you guys knew of any affordable budget hotels that you can drop me off in that's near the tryouts gym?" Shouyou asks with a smile. He sees Kenma freeze and Kuroo's eyebrows shoot up. 

"..." Kenma stays silent for a little too long, and Shouyou wonders if he's said something he shouldn't have. 

"I can look one up though! So you guys can drop me off somewhere in the area and I should be able to find one that'll let me stay two nights!" 

"Kuro." That's all he hears Kenma say, before the rooster haired man is nodding and passing his phone to Kenma. 

"Got it. Just send the text out and let them know it's you. Shouldn't be a problem." Kuroo replies. Shouyou doesn't understand what's happening.

"Um." 

Kuroo looks over at him again. "Don't worry about it chibi-chan, we know exactly where to take you." 

"Really? Where?" He asks, confused. 

"You'll see." 

He can see Kenma vigorously typing a message using Kuroo's phone, and once he's done, looks over to Shouyou again with a smile. "You're not sleeping in a random hotel, Shouyou. I'm not letting you." 

"Eh?" 

"Don't worry though, we've already found a solution." Kenma continues with a smile. 

"Eeh?" 

"Better to just go with it, there's no stopping Kenma when he's like this." Kuroo grins again. 

"But..." Shouyou begins to protest. He really hopes his friends aren't spending money on him. "K-Kenma..." 

"But you know," Kenma stares at him then, with catlike eyes that seem to be boring into his soul. "If you ever do something like this again and not let me know, I'll be really upset Shouyou." 

"Eeehhhh?" Shouyou binks. He looks between the two and can't help his confusion from growing. 

What in the world is Kenma talking about? And where in the world were they taking him?! 

CHAPTER 1 BELOW

[sweetpoetryking]

Hazbin Hotel & Helluva Boss short story

(Disclaimer: I do not own Hazbin Hotel, Helluva Boss, and the artwork used in this fic. All of these belong to their respective owners.)

All of the male overlords plus Stolas were currently in Reneé's house and apparently they were hungry.

"Well I'm starved! Who wants to eat?" Alastor asked to no one in particular, with a wide smile of course.

"As long as you're not the one cooking." Vox grumbled out to his rival.

"I could always cook something if you don't trust Alastor's cooking that much." Reneé said to Vox, but apparently that caught the attention of every demon in the house.

"Oh that sounds lovely darling~" Stolas being himself said it in a seductive tone.

"Hmm, just imagine this sweet little human wearing an apron and cooking us food. My my what a sight~" Valentino suggested while holding your shoulders.

"My what a sight indeed! But I think I might just eat you instead." Stolas then held your chin and purred(chirped?) into your ear.

Vox had enough and snatched you away from Stolas. "Enough of that birdbrain! Reneé offered it to ME, if anything I should be the one to see her cooking for ME and eat that dish."

The two flirty demons were about to argue but Lucifer beat them to it.

"While it is true that she suggested it to YOU, it does not mean that you are the only one to be able to eat what she prepared and see her in that state." He said calmly with his wide smile.

The two overlords and Goetial demon were quiet.

"Well then why don't you cook for all of us then dear?" Alastor suggested to you.

"That.. actually sounds like a good idea." Reneé replied with a small smile.

"Well then it's settled! You don't mind making some apple pie for me don't you?"

"While I wanted to make some Jambalaya, I do want to see what you would prepare for us."

"Anything you make will be alright, as long as Alastor doesn't do anything to it."

"I think we would like you instead~"

"We don't mind sharing~"

Cue the king of hell standing behind them with his wide smile looking sinister. Sensing the aura behind them, the two shut up instantly with sweat running down their faces.

"Okay, well then while I'm busy why don't you guys go sit and relax first?" Reneé insisted, ushering them out of the kitchen.

"And please don't wreck the living room just because I can't watch you guys." Reneé said with a pleading look.

"Oh I like it when you beg like that darling~"

"Keep that up and I might just gobble you right away~"

Vox was the one to stop them, "Ugh shut it you two, honestly why did I even try to tolerate you Val."

"Now now! We should accept the lady's wishes and give Reneé some space as she works. Come along now!" Alastor, being the gentleman as always, finally lead them away.

"Yes and the longer that we stay to chat, the longer it will take for our little human to prepare our meals." Lucifer says then looks at you.

"I am quite exhilarated to see what you will prepare for us, considering that I don't cook myself. Well then I shall take my leave, oh and do keep that last bit to yourself. It wouldn't be good that the others find out about my inability to create 'carnival food' now would it?" He then bows with his smile and all, making Reneé laugh a little at the gesture, winks at you and then leaves. Now Reneé was left to her own devices, and off she went to prepare a dish for every single one of them.

~ With the Overlords and Goetial demon ~

"So Vox, what was that about YOU being the one to see her in an apron and eat her cooking hmm?" Asked Stolas who, might I add, looked VERY smug.

"Ah yes I remember dear Voxie here saying something like that." Valentino pretends to ponder about it whilst holding his chin.

"If I didn't know better I'd say he has become quite fond of the human." Alastor also joined the teasing, as a way of riling up his rival of course.

"Tch well I could say the same to you guys! You all seem to have perked up when she suggested to cook for ME. I would say that you were all jealous~" Vox, even though angered from all the teasing, decided to retaliate.

"Jealous of what? You? If anything I would say that she pitied you in seeing how desperate you were to not eat my cooking." There goes Alastor riling up Vox again. At the same moment was when Lucifer finally showed up in the living room.

"Oh did I miss anything?" He said as he saw the two about to go for each others necks. "If I remember correctly Reneé said to not make a mess of her place right?"

"....yes" Was the only response(grumbles) the king got from the other demons.

"Well we best behave ourselves then if we don't want any trouble to happen at all!" Lucifer said happily but his intentions were clear. Put one toe out of line and you're in big trouble.

~ Timeskip ~

Reneé was finally done in preparing the dishes and she was about to call the demons when something hit her.

'It's quiet for once. I don't know if that's good or bad.' Furrowing her eyebrows and frowning from the thought, she decided to get it over with and call them to the dining room.

"Hey guys! I'm done with the- whoa what happened?" Reneé asked with wide eyes. Well this sight was new, every single one of them were behaving themselves and sitting quietly on your couch/floor.

"Ah already done dear?" Lucifer asks you.

"Oh umm yes, but what exactly happened here?" Reneè replied awkwardly, "I-if you don't mind me asking of course!" She hurriedly added afraid that she might offend them or something.

"Not at all! You see I just wanted to make sure that we do not make a mess of your home, isn't that right everyone?" Replied Lucifer happily, too happy actually.

"Yup" Vox.

"Yes we don't want to make you upset dear." Alastor.

"After all we won't be able to sleep together without a bedroom right?" Valentino

"I can't have my fun with you if we don't have any place to stay in darling~" Stolas

Well their replies definetely made her flustered but she was glad that they were alright. "Okay then, we should probably start or else the food will get cold. Let's go yeah?"

Reneé said with a close-eyed smile.

~ Timeskip ~

"I don't know about everyone else but I sure am full." Reneé said to them.

"Hmph, well you are only human so you can't eat as much as us demons." Vox replied to you, albeit a bit cockily.

"She is after all a lady, so it would make sense as to why she eats less than us." Ahh there goes Alastor defending her, but she had different views.

"I don't really think that's true Al, after all I helped myself to at least 2 plates brimming with food." Reneé said a bit embarassed. "Even my family said that I eat a lot." Chuckling to herself at the memory of her family teasing her about it.

"Setting that aside I think the sweet girl did a good job at making us this meal." Lucifer interjected to your conversation.

"Hmm yes she did do an amazing job of being the perfect little wife, now did you darling~?" Valentino complimented Reneé with a purr at the end.

"I wouldn't mind having you as a wife if it means I get the luxury of eating like this everytime I want, after all I only deserve the best." Stolas, of course being himself, responded to Reneé with his decadent persona.

"I wonder if I brought you to hell would you be able to create these fantastic dishes over there as well?" Pondered the king of hell.

"I don't think they would be quite excited to see a human in hell." Sweatdropping Reneé answered to Lucifer's idea.

"Oh that sounds like a marvelous idea! Reneé over here cooking magnificent dishes using hell's best ingredients! Why it might as well keep me entertained!" Now Alastor has joined at the idea of Reneé going to hell. Great.

"Yes only the best ingredients for the best results specially made for moi!" Aaand there goes Stolas.

"Umm, I don't think-"

"She might as well try some of the clothing I have back at hell." Val seriously you too?!

"You don't mind going to hell with us don't you little human? After all we have been visiting you for quite a while now, and you would have 4 overlords of hell and 1 Goetia demon as your guides." Well actually Vox did have a point.

"...." Reneé thought it over for a moment. And then she suddenly smiled and laughed. "Sure why not? After all I am quite curious as to what it looks like there, consider this as a trade for me showing you around here."

And so her day ends with the overlords being elated to knowing they would get to show Reneé around hell, and of course with more bickering from a certain deer and flat screen tv, more flirting from two other demons, resulting to the king of hell to do something so that Reneé doesn't get sued for noise complaint.

~ End ~

(Sorry if they all seem a bit ooc, also this was just based off on a dream that I had recently so it is a bit random.)