#because i still cant find any real resources

[jesterlaughingstock]

In my sign language learning endeavour sometimes i watch these videos of city names and oh my god like 70% of those cities are the most random middle of nowhere towns that I never heard of before in my life

[blackpilljesus]

The rise in popularity of single childfree women should signal that we need to start preparing. I've spoken about this before but want to address a common concern of safety regarding maIe retaliation. At this point some women may think they'll be safer trying to get a maIe but the statistics show otherwise. There's a reason women fought for rights in the first place, we all know that maIes as a collective are horrible beings. If maIes were pleasant to be around & reproduce with, they wouldn't need to force women into it.

Now I dont have all the answers in terms of what to do in the face of maIe retaliation but where to start:

1 - Move in silence. MaIes dont need to know our every move. MaIes have enough power as is, them knowing our strategy on top of that wont help. Hell, play dumb sometimes. This also applies to other women, if they push marriage & kids bs be measured in your response, in the end you know your truth. At the end of the day most of these women are also aware of the danger maIes pose.

2 - Organise. This is tough, extremely tough i can't lie. For one we're scattered all over the world & people in our real lives wouldn't have the committment to this nor believe in deviating from the nuclear structure but it is something needed. Even if it's just online, find or build networks with likeminded women. I say this as a lone wolf but infrastructure & network is needed because the government will make it harder to survive alone so some would need to be able to lean on each other for support even if it's just verbal. Practice separatism as far as you can. Take up learning how to defend yourself. If you're serious about this; be prepared to break the rules at some point because playing nice & by the law wont work. These things are set up by men for men and it wont help us. I'm not saying go out there & purposefuly break the law or put yourself in harms way, just saying prepare. It sounds far out now but the current system cant be counted on, blind eyes are turned when maIes abuse women, women are punished for defending themselves under the system. Even if you dont want to go down the route of community, learn to take care of yourself & hold your own down.

3 - Stop arguing with maIes. This doesnt mean that xys are right, I say this a lot but maIes are fully aware of everything. Arguing with maIes online is a waste of time, time that can go to building for yourself or likeminded women. MaIes denying female oppression is part of the game to keep you wasting your energy on them as opposed to working on yourself. It's to keep you in their hands; doesn't matter whether you're right or not, how many statistics you throw at them, you're still biting their bait.

4 - Stack up on resources & money. If you have resources & money and the priviledge to save then start now. If/when things go downhill it wont be a snap thing but a transition so this window needs to be used to the best of our advantage. Take advantage of the privileges you have now to set yourself for the future because that could very well be gone.

I doubt we'd win tbh but I'd rather die trying than live submitting. I will mention that I know it's scary but we have to think forward. Bear in mind the system has never worked for women, some will say things like "but when women leave maIes get more violent" but there is no safety in the first place. Women are sexually harrassed & assaulted any where at any time with no protection already. Women are constantly told of all the things they should or shouldn't do to avoid maIe violence and it doesnt work anyways, maIes will continue to abuse women & girls. No amount of listening & obeying has helped women because it doesn't matter what the reason for maIe violence is, if they cant find a reason they'll create a reason because their motive is to make women suffer in addition to reproduction & having labour.

Now I know many will speak about the violence of maIe retaliation which I'll address in part 3. This is part 2 of 'the rise in single childfree women' group of posts.

Part 1

[brumeraven]

🦋: Tombstone Keys || dolls, commoditization, abandonment, conformity, mutilation, transformations, violence, gods?, angels?, curious to know if anyone gets the title since it's fairly obscure and opaque

It's funny, isn't it? What is and isn't fashionable. Changes with the weather sometimes, others times things stick like glue.

There aren't many dolls left anymore. Not much use for them since the gig economy took over.

The doll aesthetic, though?

So hot right now.

Can't go a minute in a sleepy village without seeing a girl with porcelain mask or clockwork gloves or something else "dollcore."

Sometimes a literal doll core, showing oh-so-coyly from a provocatively low neckline, elegant crystal facets nestled in between so much garish flesh.

I grimaced as just such a number went mincing by, sundress all embroidered with primroses, hair coiffed and topped with a canted, raffish arrangement neither quite fascinator nor derby hat. All that kept it from being chintzy was the price tag with more zeros than class.

It might have been a convincing display, if not for her airs.

While a doll might once have been bedecked so by its owner, any would have done all it could to avoid notice, even in such an getup. Certainly, none would have walked with so much...heaving and jiggling of flesh.

I brushed the thoughts away as I followed the girl down the street. There is, of course, no accounting for taste, and yet that saying is so rarely afforded to the more daring of us, those who actually broke norms.

Like it or not, dolls were "in." Or at least their aesthetic was.

Only problem is they weren't made anymore. Hadn't been for decades. On the other hand, given the number produced, it was easy to find old stock to break down for parts.

First, it was just the broken and worthless, of course, but then, well, fashion demands nothing but the best.

Flesh might decay, but dolls never did.

The thought brought with it bitter awareness of the once-taught skin that now sagged and slumped tiredly about my face.

Dolls just...went on existing, no matter what changed, untouched by the passing of the years.

Buyers started scouting estate sales and secondhand stores, desperate to find anywhere a well-maintained family heirloom might have been carelessly tossed out, hungry for the payday such a find could bring, like so many vultures...no, vultures ate carrion; these were predators.

Then, of course, the market caught on, as it always does, and deals became rare as the pickings became slim. There's only so long you can drain an irreplaceable resource before prices skyrocket.

The cheap knock-offs from overseas were simply no match for the real, vintage item.

This girl, well, she clearly had the means to afford it. The parts she wore were pristine, or had been before they'd been scalped. My fingers clenched, not as smoothly as they once had, true, but still with a force than belied their gnarled form.

It was revolting. Sacrilegious. Dolls had been marvels of engineering, masterpieces of ingenuity. Beautiful, yes, but not for porcelain shells and glittering cores. Beautiful because they were a thing made for a purpose, made to last, effective and graceful no matter the task.

The beauty lay in how they'd been made with such care by human hands, the ineffable meeting of the mundane and the sacred.

No, not the mundane...for dolls were not mortal, purposeless things, cursed with free-will and the capacity for sin. Dolls were created, yes, but divine.

Dolls were as angels, wheeled, mechanical things of inerrant purpose and inscrutable construction.

Angels on whom God had turned His back.

Angels now cast from heaven for the sin of having shining wings that pleased the eye, no matter they'd once been used to fly.

She turned to face me, eye vacant, smile vacuous, devoid of everything but life.

I shut my eyes, trying to forgive her sins. It had been her hunger that destroyed, if not her hands.

I didn't fear death as she did. Nonexistence was simply that. This fate, though, how much worse?

That a thing once given purpose might be hacked apart and used as but aesthetic trappings?

I could think of no worse fate.

A pity I couldn't inflict it on her. She'd been made for no reason but a grunting, sweaty collision of flesh, some tepid spurts of what passed for passion.

If anything, well, I'd done her a favor.

The thought amused me as I made the switch, peeled the near-putrid skin off my frame and replaced it with her face and hands.

Some creators found meaning in their creations, whether they wanted to or not.

~🦋

[umbrvx]

i like ur art. its great and interesting!! i really like your artstyle and i really like the way u draw hsy, yjh, and kdj. you captured them so well in terms of vibes/character. also i was wondering do u have any advice to improve on drawing anatomy/poses/faces?

wahh thank you so much...!! i feel like im still trying to figure them out in a lot of ways but i do really like ironing out my visual interpretations of them so im really happy to hear if people like what im coming up with

also anon you super activated the part of my brain that cant help but yap about art theory... i spent some time writing as many tips as i could think of. unfortunately i dont think i have the time currently to do a fully illustrated guide, but ill still try to include some visual examples:

[incoming wall of text lol]

ANATOMY:

to preface i think that like 100% of the time you should reference a real life photo for anatomy rather than other artwork or drawn references. the best way to learn the body is by… well, actually looking at the body! but also artwork is informed by a person's own artistic ability/stylization choices/sense of idealism, so while looking at art can help give you an idea on how to break down forms, i think you would be best served observing real life references. i labor on this point because i do think that having over relied on drawn reference material and avoiding photographic references on the basis of not being interested on realism hindered me as a largely self-taught artist as a kid, so i want to encourage live or photographic reference since anatomy is one of the foundations from which everything else is built on. that being the case, all of my doodles i'm doing for this are going to be for the sake of example rather than to strictly say how you should or should not be drawing something

-> when you are doing a study of a photo, just try copying it as best as you can. pay close attention to the natural lines and shapes of the body -- the S-curve shape of the leg, the triangular shape of the forearm, the trapezoid shape of hips/thighs when they sit, and so on. note where the body folds or squishes or pulls; how mass will shift to accommodate a certain position. if a form is hard to visualize, focus on the negative space and carve that out, rather than strictly drawing the positive space.

don't expect to get it perfect the first time. in fact, iterate on it multiple times to build understanding. try doing it to a timer of 15, then 10, then 5 minutes. doing this will force you to have to prioritize the most important shapes. you can help reinforce this by using a thicker brush or a brush with no pen pressure (no joke ms paint works great for this) to force you to be loose and not become preoccupied with details.

-> pinterest is a great resource for finding and compiling photo reference material

-> organic shapes are curved, so embracing/emphasizing that (particularly for the extremities) can help make your drawings look more natural or fluid

POSES: -> it all begins & ends with contrapposto… you've probably heard of the line of action, which is related. if you're offsetting the shoulders & hips, it: makes poses more natural, more dynamic, and helps the pose sort of "draw itself" -- the legs will follow the direction of the hips, and you can use the arms to reinforce the angles

-> context is key. don't ask: what pose should i draw? instead ask: what do i want this character to convey? what does happiness, anger, sadness, and so forth look on this particular character? how do they express that? consider these drawings: these are both ostensibly the same pose, but look at how changing just the shape of the spine recontextualizes it.

for more on pose design i recommend watching Tracer & Pose Design 101 - The Animation of Overwatch by New Frame Plus (i promise this is a genuinely super informative video).

to expand on this, in general, all of the components of a piece (background, composition, pose, etc.) are best considered in conjunction rather than separately. it is difficult to choose a pose and then choose a background because they are missing the context that would make a piece cohesive. when you are planning a drawing, try to begin with your general concept/idea/prompt and then do several thumbnails -- small and quick doodles that should take no longer than 5 minutes each -- developing it: you may find that the pose and bg will naturally fall into place.

-> silhouette: the degree to which you need to push this varies by style but generally speaking the pose needs to be readable; i.e. instantly recognizable. try to keep important elements of the gesture outside of the silhouette. for example, if the character is pointing, keep that arm out of the interior of the body. the same pose can be more or less readable or dynamic depending on where the character is pointed in relation to the viewer

-> exaggeration!! goes along with the previous point. push the pose as much as you can (and what makes sense for your style) to communicate your pose as clearly and as intensely as possible.

FACES: -> i highly recommend the app Handy Art Reference Tool by Belief Engine for all things related to drawing hands/heads/feet. its on both android and ios. it isn't free -- it costs around $3 -- but that is seriously such a small price to pay for the amount of utility you get out of it: the hands models are fully poseable (there's also pose presets), you can rotate the head models however you want, and there is 3-point customizable lighting. it is really helpful for getting those super tricky and hyperspecific head angles that you just can't find a real life reference for. that being said given that there's only a few different head model variants, bear in mind how differences in features can affect what exactly a face will look like in those angles.

-> i still recommend doing studies of real people. as with anything else, learning generalized proportions is important, even if you are going to later on bend or break this depending on style

-> as for my own approach... it kind of depends on the style i'm doing at that particular time. for my paintings (what id consider my main style) i approach a character with a few real-world features in mind and then apply them to the best of my ability. it usually will take a few iterations to land on an interpretation i really like as i try out different things. a lot of the face also gets developed during rendering rather than through my initial sketch too, as i adjust for lighting and correct proportions on the fly

(look how much this image changes between sketch and render lol)

if i were to recommend anything, i think it would be to nail down your most distinct features first -- the ones that will make your character's face recognizable, and could apply regardless of art style. in my case with kim dokja, i knew when i first started drawing him that i wanted to give him a longer face and down-turned eyes. when i decided to do the disco elysium inspired set, in which i was breaking out of my comfort zone by letting go of any idealizations focusing on conveying characterization/making them feel "real", i landed on some more specific traits (defined lower lids/perpetually tired eyes/eyebags(?) the crease there idk how to describe it) which i continue to try to evoke even if im drawing something much more cartoony

(pictured are my first kdj -> disco elysium style -> my post de-style kdj)

as a side note, this very same process changed yjh much more dramatically

(^ that first guy is mad someone else)

those handful of key features will be the thing that you can then take into a simpler style and simplify or exaggerate to whatever degree suits you. you can also play with shape theory (square = sturdy/solid, circle = natural/smooth/welcoming, triangle = energetic/dangerous). shape theory doesn't necessarily need to be so rigid -- you can combine shapes as you please to convey whatever vibe you're going for -- so please think of it as a tool that may help rather than a rigid law you must abide by.

-> expressions: exaggerate them. thats kind of it!! make it big!!! you wanna be able to really feel those emotions. the principles of squash & stretch help here: think of how the muscles move when you, say, open the eyes or mouth really big. as one side of the face stretches open, the other side squashes to accommodate it

even without changing the position of the jaw here, moving the nose and scrunching the eyes will sell the expression

you can also play with squash/stretch to break proportions to sell a feeling more

since expressions are just, well, poses for the face, everything else for poses applies here (and facial expressions & pose should also be considered in tandem). while the term contrapposto itself just refers to the offset of the shoulders & hips, the similar principle of asymmetry also carries here as that will help make the expression a bit more dynamic.

and i think... that's it!! all i can think of at least. i hope it helps anon!!!

[romandaandromeda]

the amazing circus of not real episode 2:

[SPOILERS OF PARODIC NATURE AHEAD]

[buttonblossom shipping art at the end too in other news]

pomni: i am going to die a nobody because i [%$!#]ed up bad yesterday

ragatha: pomni

pomni:

ragatha: :(

caine: go to the candy place and catch some varmints

bubble: https://www.cs.cmu.edu/~biglou/resources/bad-words.txt

zooble: no

ragatha: pomni

pomni: uh

IN CANDY WORLD

everyone: this place looks awesome

[happy gangle dies]

princess loolilalu: hello youre all welcome here :)

ragatha: pomni (positive)

pomni: (negative)

ragatha: :(

princess loolilalu: you have to get our syrup back

ragatha: you got it

jax: i hope nothing but death and gore and violence and all that is unholy in the eyes of god happen today

jax: by the way gangle [%$!#] you

ELSEWHERE IN CANDY AUSTRALIA

gummygators: we gotta stop these guys from taking our rightful syrup

jax: i have a gun let’s kill these guys

gangle: lets not do th

jax: i have a gun let’s kill gangle

ragatha: pomni

jax: yeah pomni be useful for once

[he throws her out of the magical semitruck that i forgot to mention and gets wedged between the syrup truck and the semitruck, conflict ensues]

jax: i’ve really gotta let out my violence pomni be a dear and just keep cool

pomni: i hate you

[pomni gets unstretched]

jax: well look now i cant do my violence thing

gummygators: lets throw them off our trail

jax: lets kill them

[chase scene continues]

jax: lets kill them

ragatha: BUT POMNI

jax: gangle (specifically) lets kill them or i’ll blackmail you

gangle: 😃

[the gators freaking stab the semitruck and impale ragatha]

kinger: i will save the day and pomni

[he throws an anchor]

jax: :|

[the semitruck falls into chocolate river]

jax: you are responsible for every tragedy and atrocity ever committed in history i don’t know why anybody even trusts you anymore

gangle: :(

[pomni and gummigoo clip into the blue void of nonexistence]

IN THE BLUE VOID OF NONEXISTENCE

[gummigoo discovers he’s not real]

gummigoo: what is going on

pomni: uhm

gummigoo: what are we in the end

gummigoo: are we even real

gummigoo: what (philisophical)

BACK IN CANDY WORLD

[the gang are alright]

ragatha: i hope pomni’s okay

jax: could you literally shut up about pomni and focus on the now

the greedy from the 1977 raggedy ann movie: im gonna eat you

ragatha: dont actually

the greedy from the 1977 raggedy ann movie: oh man im sorry

jax: what the heck are you anyways

the greedy from the 1977 raggedy ann movie: im the fudge and i eat people which is why i got banished to this river

ragatha: dear god

jax: you’re actually the coolest thing i’ve ever experienced (ragatha you have licorice hair)

ragatha: >:(

jax: i’ll help you get back into the kingdom if you help us

[the 2 remaining gummygators fall right into the chocolate river]

BACK IN THE BLUE VOID OF NONEXISTENCE

[pomni attempts to get a truck moving]

pomni: are you alright

gummigoo: no i’m literally just a puppet

pomni: i feel you man

gummigoo: we’re fake things for your crew to stop every time

pomni: well you still have your crew up there and you care about them like they do you right

gummigoo: why does this matter

pomni: because nobody should go through this at any point

gummigoo: well then let’s get ourselves out of this mess

pomni: we gotta get the truck to glitch out again

[so they do exactly that and have a bit of a moment in the teapot zone]

BACK IN CANDY WORLD

jax: well this sucked

gangle: why

jax: i wanted to kill people

ragatha: so they’re just gone

the 2 remaining gummigators: yeah

ragatha: right

kinger: well caine could find her easily

ragatha: yeah but she could be suffering and she isn’t fond of me after what happened yesterday

kinger: dont let it get to you maybe she’s just adjusting to this word like you did when you were new

ragatha: true

kinger: huh

[pomni and gummigoo burst out of the ground and kill the greedy from the 1977 raggedy ann movie by landing at mach 1 on him]

ragatha: POMNI

pomni: hi and i made a friend

[both gangs agree on taking the two syrup trucks on their own ways]

jax: https://youtu.be/rPKN7-pTpCY?si=YtSnNuJD1hlICZ1G

ragatha: maybe next time

jax: shut the [%$!#] up maybe

pomni: btw this is gummigoo and he’s joining the circus

ragatha: sounds good to me

jax: SHUT UP

princess loolilalu: you saved our kingdom

princess loolilalu: have fun killing that gator

pomni: yeah (sarcastically)

[that scene when the tripod emerges in war of the worlds 05 but with the greedy from the 1977 raggedy ann movie happens off screen]

jax: hehe

ragatha: WHAT DID YOU DO

princess loolilalu: no seriously what did you do

jax: bye

BACK IN THE DIGITAL CIRCUS

caine: welcome back everyone

gummigoo: this place is nice

caine: oh

[gummigoo perishes]

caine: just a precaution

[pomni loses her mind]

caine: okay bye

zooble: good riddance

ragatha: well maybe he’ll return some day

[the gang without jax hold a funeral for kaufmo]

[genuinely a pretty emotional scene and pomni feels assured]

THE END

in summary for fellow buttonblossom shippers:

[multiplicity-positivity]

hi, since you seem to be open to giving advice, i figured id try asking you. if this is an issue you cant help with, thats totally okay! thank you for reading.

so um, do you have any tips on how to get someone to take your system/plurality seriously?

i "came out" as plural to my counselor a while ago without using the specific terms, but it feels like she just isn't taking me seriously, or acknowledging that these parts are seperate pieces of me. its really frustrating, because its something she needs to understand about us... and she just isnt getting it.

again, if you cant help with this, thats fine! i just though id try. and ofc, if you need more info, i am happy to provide it.

hey, we’re really sorry to hear you’ve been dealing with someone in your life who you should be able to rely on not taking your system or plurality seriously.

we do have a post with tips and advice on “coming out” as a system to loved ones.

at this point, after you’ve already talked to your counselor about being plural, it may be a good idea to send some resources her way so she can start learning about plurality from some outside perspectives. for singlets who haven’t really heard much about plurality, it may take learning from a few resources in order for them to realize that this is a real phenomenon, and an integral part of who you are that affects every aspect of your life. we’re not sure whether or not you have a dissociative disorder, and we’ve included these links in the above post, but we’ll go ahead and add links to the articles that we (a did system) use whenever we attempt to explain our multiplicity to someone new.

^ for systems of all types

^ did/osdd specific, but still an excellent read for literally anyone

^ also did/osdd specific, but great for those who are struggling and need support from loved ones

we do hope that after sharing some resources and talking earnestly and openly about your plurality and how it impacts you, your counselor will be a bit more understanding and accommodating. however, please understand that this might not happen. sometimes singlets can be baffled, indifferent, or uncomfortable about plurality. facing something that they don’t understand may cause them to ignore it or lash out.

our system personally prefers to be ignored as a system rather than be shamed, fakeclaimed, or belittled due to our multiplicity. your system might need to have some internal conversations in order to make this call for yourselves. hopefully, your counselor will be open to learning and can start treating your system with the respect and recognition y’all deserve. but if that doesn’t happen, we hope y’all can find some validation internally and continue to learn more about each other and work together in positive ways.

sorry if this response isn’t much help, but we’re wishing y’all the best of luck with everything. and if there’s anything we can do to help y’all figure things out, don’t hesitate to reach out :)

[pink-elefantz]

silly rant<3

hey so what is the cutoff between whats considered masking and whats considered lying i am asking this as a liar lol. like i find it interesting as fuck genuinely where is the line meant to be drawn. i do believe a lot of autistic people who mask and cant discern this line end up overcorrecting severely and developing what's called a personality disorder and like there are studies around this diagnosis massively being a thing that people get when theyve gone their whole lives unsupported for autism/adhd because sometimes the response to that is i need to do absolutely anything to be perceived as a human being and i dont know what it is about me thats so inhuman so ill just become an entirely different person for everyone i meet i guess. because u get to a point where u realise that social cues are not a static thing and that every allistic person actually has their own seperate set of rules for how to act and they all act like that is inherently the way ur meant to act but fucking somehow simultaneously all of them know how to abide by each others social rules even though theyre all different, and u go fucking insane and then come to the conclusion that the only way to be able to speak the same language as these people is to completely lose ur identity to whoever u are talking to in the moment. and then the more u hang out with anyone the more you lose of yourself and u do it so hard and for so long that you end up not being able to shut it off for people who genuinely dont care how u act and u cant actually tell when youre lying anymore and you dont even know if you lied about being sick in the first place and just made urself this way and when u try to get help for this all of the resources are like "this is an evil manipulative thing that evil people do" and its like. so first of all people who are traumatized into defaulting to manipulative behaviours are not evil people and they dont deserve to be demonized but also i never lied to make anyone do anything for me i lied to protect myself from being treated like a monster how could i ever possibly explain myelf how do u undo a damage like that without making someone come to the conclusion that u were using them. it is such an intricate process untangling all the little strands of lies with someone u know and is it even possible to do it fully without making the person feel like u were only friends with them to make them adore u or get them to give u things. like i swear to god no lie i have ever told anyone about myself was for any ulterior motive i dont even like being around people. i just didnt want to be a freak anymore. and then being a freak was cool so i was a freak but not a REAL FREAK i still was just some other person my entire fucking life has just been observing peoples interactions and going oh that got a positive reaction ill try that. and then i try it and its like oh no one liked that. what were the variables. i need to know the variables but i can never repeat this experiment again because i cant actually deal with getting another negative reaction my heart cant take it when they look at me like that when they realise im a fake person just pretending to be human why did it work with that other person and not me what the fuck did i do wrong. and u cant exactly go and tell this to ur therapist who smokes freuds cock for breakfast because u will just get "liar" put on ur file and lose even more of ur autonomy and make it even less likely for people to believe u when u report psychiatric abuse. anyway peace and love on planet earht the camera zooms out to a blue sky and polka dot house and i am waving at u from below with my dog goodbye!!!!!!!!!!!!bye!!!!

[windvexer]

hey not sure if this is okay to ask but i was wondering who i could even ask about something like this and you were the first person i thought of! i been using some oracle cards for years now and they are pretty intuitive and over the years we got to understand eachother pretty well to the point i understand what they mean with no problem. i decided to get a tarot deck is a very nice one (star spinner tarot) and it comes with a booklet with some information of each card but i feel like is not enough for me to grasp what they are trying to say? (also i never used reversed meanings with my other cards so thats a bit confusing) i was wondering if you have any advice for someone getting into tarot? i do have experience with like other cards, pendulums, even runes, etc. but i feel like the information that came with this one is very short and i cant understand them as well as my regular cards sorry if this is not an okay thing to ask!!

Hi, Anon.

Star Spinner tarot looks lovely!

You don't have to use reversals. I don't use them sometimes. It depends on my mood and how much I want to deal with.

For anyone getting into tarot, I would recommend starting your own notes and adding information from many different resources.

For most decks, lots online information is available for each card. BiddyTarot.com is a popular resource for more general card meanings. If you'd really like to study tarot, I highly recommend The Mystical Origins of the Tarot by Paul Huson.

As you study extended resources, contemplate meanings for a certain card as you look at the card. Consider not only popular contemporary meanings (BiddyTarot) and what your deck creator has to say (booklet with the cards), but also historical resources (Huson).

As you find meanings that resonate with you and stick out to you, add them to your notes.

Don't worry about trying to paint a complete picture of every card. Focus on the meanings that make sense to you. Most readers seem to find that their understandings of the cards are in flux and will always grow and evolve. So you're creating a starting point for where you're at right now, not the all-time ultimate meaning reference book.

Don't worry at all about trying to memorize the cards. Even professional readers you pay will still use their guidebooks and notes if they want to.

Common advice given to beginners is to start with only one-card draws and maybe do a 3-card spread if you're feeling bold, but this advice didn't work for me, and may not work for you either.

When I began reading I got so little information from each card that I had to do relatively large spreads just to get any information out of them.

It might help you to experiment with the number of cards drawn, and in what spreads you place them.

There are many exercises a person can do to try and connect with their cards more. Try forgetting the book meanings altogether and trying to craft story narratives based on what's happening in the pictures.

Another exercise that can be fun and helpful is to play with your deck while you watch a show. During the show, pull random cards and ask yourself how that card relates to what you're seeing on screen. You might want to pause and look at the book, but also look for other ways to connect:

The mood or atmosphere of the picture

The different characters on the card, what they're doing, and how they're acting

The location or setting of the card

The objects that can be found in the card

The goal of this TV show exercise is not to perform accurate readings on a TV show, but to stretch your mind and become comfortable relating the card to real world situations. As long as you can say, "this card matches because [...]," you have won the game.

Lastly, tarot is a relatively complex divinatory system with lots of moving parts and layers of meaning. It's normal for it to take a while to sink in - it's definitely not the easiest system to get into.

[gayspock]

ok 1 menty b for me

i dont know. i think its just always been so alienating. i think theres something wrong with me and its unfixable. and sometimes, if i cant have anything else, i just want at least the fucking chance to express that without people thinking even less of me. and ik in reality nobody even gaf or sees me. but i also know know that if they did, 9times out fo 10 people would be rolling their eyes. whatever. idk. i feel so lonely and i dont think im ever not going to be lonely and its never going to get better because even when given the resources, the opportunities i just can never manage . i just cant . i swear i try . but every single time. my whole fucking life . i just walk away from everything with even less, it feels like. and its getting so much harderand harder. and i dont know how to express it liek ... i fucking feel myself SEETHE as ppl keep insisting "theres still a chance! there's still hope!" like sure bro. but i dont want to fucking keep living my life along the fucking asymptote of getting consistently closer to dying alone but "haha technically its not a certainty" and . like theres just something so fucking repulsive about me and i just cant seem to fix it no matter what. and im so exhausted all the time. and i genuinely dont think theres any way out of that . i go to work and i come home so burnt out and tired. and people are nice there but i dont think i can really connect with anyone . i just cant seem to get close to people . and i dont have it within me to meet anyone else because im so fucking tired all of the time .

and even if i did and i mustered all the energy and spent all the little time i had left in the world i dont think theyd have time for me. not just bc nobody in their 20s does but also because i dont know . it just never seems to work . and i cant do it again where i try to invest every little piece of me into it when its jsut always left me fucking miserable and pathetic. bro do you know what i mean. not to be 16 and lame as shit still. i feel like im always the idiot ppl take pity on at best . i dont think ive ever been real to anybody. like alwaysssssss...... and even now i feel like every time I HAVE existed within circles of others. its literally 10 times out of 10 just constantly fighting to be included and seen as someone whos not a fucking joke and i just feel like such a fucking . loser for caring so much about it when. REALISTICALLY. pretty much all the people ive met in life will have forgotten i exist. and ok. ok. i just dont think ... like its not like some trait within me right like ... im not As melodramatic to be like oh . oh theres an actual innate trait within me thats activated and stops people liking me. just. the contrary like. i just think theres nothing within me to actually like . or to gravitate towards. so likeyeah sure . that makes sense. why WOULD you want to bother with someone whos just kinda hollow or whatever.. something something or other. and i kind of wish i was more resilient about tht. but i jsut . i guess as is a Guy of that Nature, its just ... im trying to fucking not fucking spiral but i just feel myself fucking filling up with fucking . miserable SHITTY bile or whatever because i just wish i felt normal or whatever. its such a fucking human fucking thing that other people can MANAGE. but i cant . its so so fucking hard and i cant do it and i cant handle it. and i just feel so angry sometimes anyways . bc i hate it . and i keep trying bc i wanna make peace with it because i know theres no out . like ive long since given up on ever thinking its going to work out . because nothing fucking helps but makes it so much worse . anyways. i dont know. but i dont know bro. it drives me fucking insane when people always spout some bs about how "haha everyone has someone! everyone will find someone! like no they dont no they wont . its so .. so much more isolating. or like "EVERYONEEE feels lonely sometimes" like HOW does that help. HOW. and it makes it so MUCH FUCKING WORSEEEE when people tell you about how lonely they are too!!! like cool . i dont have a chance then. sorry i know thats such a bitter bitch thing to say. but idk if it rlly matters like ... at the end of the day idc when ppl have partners. or people they talk to. family who loves them. and youre still lonely. cool. thank you for letting me know, dude. go back to the people who will look out for you and love you whilst i sit in the dark and not speak to anyone for weeks whilst not a single person would even notice im gone .

or like. bro. i dont think a single person has taken me seriously for long enough to ever fucking like me or hold me in enough regard to like... want to talk to me again nevermind like be with me in a certain sense so i jsut. i dont know. sits alone. every fucking day for years maybe. i dont know. i feel so fucking sad and angry knowing deep down that i can know all this and know its true but even then . i cant even have that . people wont even take THAT part of me seriouslyand think im just some fucking idiot whos not even trying. when i really reallyhave but its just so... worthless it feels like . it feels like im never getting anywhere and everyone thinks i just gave up when i didnt. and i dont know. thar makes it sound like people actually see me and really are laughing or something when i dont think its nearly that much. i think its like oh people see me make that as a snap judgement and i fall out of existence again. and i dont know. it shouldnt matter but i feel so fucking strung out and exist between these instances only and idk. idk bro. im trying to be okay with it. but as im getting older i just feel like theres so many more things that are revealing themselves as worse and worse. and im going crazy. im going crazzzzzzyyyy . whatever . insert the mental breakdown gifs . the funny ones where those guys aremoving really fast

[schizosupport]

Hi! I never send asks I'm sorry if this is weird or awkward? I'm just sitting in a mental health ward right now and trying to figure out whats going on.

So I've had mental health problems for a decade now but the past week is the first time my paranoia and things have ever gotten this bad, it felt like there were creatures? shadow people? in my apartment and i was only safe if i stayed totally still and silent cause then they couldnt hurt me, i kept seeing them out of the corner of my eyes, and it just wasnt safe to touch the floor or look in mirrors in the same way your brain wont let you touch a hot stove and no one seems to understand when i explain that its just not safe i cant do it and i cant explain. Is there a word for that? i dont understand any of this.

But it just kept getting worse and worse until my friend called the police on me and they took me to the hospital. ive calmed down now and realize it wasnt real but it FELT real and I feel like im going insane and don't know what to do, theyre saying its micropsychosis because of my bpd and because its supposedly bpd they dont know if they can help with meds but i dont feel like i can function like this, i know it gets bad again when im alone and i live alone and no one here seems to understand anything about psychosis at all, they keep giving me pamphlets on anxiety and breathing exercises (helpful but not what I need-what do i do when im seeing things? when something feels unsafe do i force myself to do it anyways as exposure therapy? or treat it like its real and try and calm down that way?) And basically i was wondering if you have any advice? or even reliable places to read more to learn about psychosis or micropsychosis or whatever this is? i just know its terrifying and im scared and dont feel like i can talk to anyone about it. Sorry this got so long!

Hi there!

It sounds like you had a really scary episode of paranoia, I'm sorry that happened to you! It's definitely recognizable to me as an experience, and I completely understand why you are scared of being that irrationally afraid again. It's very scary to lose control of your own mind in that way.

It always sucks when the MH professionals around you don't seem to quite understand your difficulty. While they may be right that this sounds like it could be an episode of "micro psychosis" that could be associated with bpd (or other disorders), that doesn't mean that it isn't a type of psychosis and that you can't benefit from resources geared more at that.

I would say about medication that the professionals may be reluctant around antipsychotic medication, because those are very side effect heavy medications, but if you continue to have experiences like this, it's not to say that it couldn't be worth it for you. Everyone responds very differently.

As for how to "deal with it" it's honestly very hard, especially in the beginning, and it's not something I can easily summarize in my current state and everyone is very different. But I think that trying to find things that make you feel more safe in the moment is important, even if it's "silly". Like for me, if I'm having a bad time when I'm going to sleep, I'll sleep with my lights on to avoid the worst of the paranoia. And I know some people have a teddy they consider protective, stuff like that. It might seem like "leaning into the crazy", but I don't personally think that it's harmful to use the "crazy" logic of these episodes to find a bit of comfort as well.

I hope that you can start to feel more safe.. and if this continues or gets worse I hope you can find some help from the professionals in your life.. otherwise I recommend looking for communities of others with similar experiences.

I hope this answer finds you well,

Glitch

[doggirlhen]

i just finished spiritfarer, actually properly finished. its impossible for me to talk about this game purely subjective bc its so. close to me. and my lived experience. putting this big long thing under a keep reading, warnings for discussion of death and whatnot as thats the prominent theme of the game, and spoilers for the game probably

please excuse the messy, rambly writing, im very tired and very very emotional about this sad boat game and just need to get my thoughts about it down before i go crazy

impossible to not cry at the end. i bought this game around 2019 on my switch, fresh after two or three big familial deaths. picked it up here and there but could never get myself to the end, either being to busy or it being too much for me. i finally found some time now, after owning it on PC for a year or two, to sit down and let myself experience it.

this game treats the passing of loved ones with such respect and care and the grief that follows so beautifully. even the characters i didnt much care for i felt heavily about when it was their turn through the everdoor. it blends this grief with gameplay mechanics so well, and doesnt ever let you forget those close to you. almost every character either has a resource you can collect because of them, their spirit still there when you need more of it, or theyre the ones who had you build the crafting station to make materials and youre reminded of them when you step in the door. i found myself making sure i had everyones favorite foods stocked in my inventory well past their exit. and to really hammer it in, everyone gets their profile marked in the stars when theyre gone.

stella's job is to take care of people, but shes always felt like a vessel-type character to me, as ive had my dealings with the loss of loved ones and those around me and found it incredibly easy to wear her shoes.

moments that really stood out to me were atul not letting you take him through, you just find his flower on its own. so heavily touched me, a man whos only ever cared for you not letting you see his struggles because he knew thats all youd devote yourself too. stanley, letting the weird kid take it the only way a kid could, curious but scared but you were holding his hand. i cant even begin to talk about daria, shes new to me and i can only hope no one can relate to her story but feel for her just the same. gwen, god i could go on about gwen. all the characters feel so lively, so real, all dealing with whats ending them as best they can.

the one that got me the most, though, was astrid. my grandmother on my moms side passed in 2019, so already getting me with a grandmother character but astrids story and motivations remind me so much of her and one of her lines at the everdoor, "dont forget me or i'll haunt you" sounds exactly like somehting my grandmother would say. tears pouring out of my eyes only beat by the end of the game as a whole. such a beautiful story

and beautiful game, too. breaking from the sad stuff for a bit to say the art and music are so beautfully crafted and touching, every character design and choice of animal so perfectly selected. look at darias profile how can you not fall in love immediately. look at her :3

just. please play this game if you have any sort of feelings about grief and loss. its touched my heart several times in the years since 2016 after lots of familial death and covid. its a bunch of different games at once, largely a resource management and crafting game but the story is so well written and the visuals are beautiful and im soon to buy the soundtrack because i always need it with me

this game means so much to me and will forever be on my mind, one million thank yous and tears to thunder lotus games and everyone involved.

[areyouafraid]

the people at the top truly live twisted lives like billionaires are truly fucked up tormented people. don't take any of this as defending any of these people in any way, they all suck, but it's kind of fascinating to me like. do you ever think about their personal lives? of course jeff bezos will always put on a calculated hyper-professional facade when speaking to a public audience but what do you think is going on behind closed doors? idont have a lot of credible examples to give off the top of my head but it's like. the sheer magnitude of their power completely disconnects them from the rest of society, most of them seem not to have any real friends and consequently they end up turning into these bizarre completely detached people. people who operate on a completely different set of morals and principles than any you would find in even the most fucked up of everyday people. it's sort of dizzying to even think about. when i imagine the lives of even just like upper-middle class people i get caught up in the idea of like, conforming and fitting into society and not being left wanting at the cost of your authenticity and self-expression... imagine youre literally one of the richest people on the fucking planet, with the funds to buy literally anything you could possibly want and still have money left over, with the power and resources to change the trajectory of an entire society if not the world itself, and as a consequence are almost completely isolated from society with no real friends besides like your business partners and maybe your fucking servants or whatever. not to reference the same guy again but jeff bezos probably couldnt just like go to a yoga class or go to a store alone. there are so many like mundane experiences these people probably cant do because of their status and god knows any decent man would maul jeff bezos like a chimp if they saw him alone outside a cumberland farms at night

honestly i feel bad for their kids. nobody is born into the world knowing anything. can you just imagine the fucking nightmare of a childhood that is having the press track your every movement and being sent to prestigious private schools with like 5 other kids if they arent just straight up homeschooled. what do you think they even end up getting taught? do you think theyre given the same education as normal kids? we know that certain billionaires are none too bright... i dont know like

[mariska]

hello tumblr friends who live in my phone i just wanted to pop in real quick and let everyone know that I Am (somehow) Still Alive since i mentioned being very sick last month and did not want anyone 2 think i had finally Expired. wish i could say i'm doing better this month but while im definitely nowhere near as miserable as i was in April, i've been spending this month trying to deal with Sickness Aftershocks that have been making all of my long term autoimmune diseases/health issues in general flare up randomly really bad at pretty much completely random times and i also have a whole new fun set of similar feeling but definitely different and 100x worse physical health problems and its been extremely difficult to try and power through all of it like i'm used to doing for the 26 years i have been alive 😔 but i'm still hangin in there. idk how at this point lmao. subconscious fight or flight survival mode i guess. i'm like 99% sure i somehow caught one of the new covid mutations in April unfortunately despite the lifelong Agoraphobia and 3+ years of effort i've done to do literally everything in my ability to stay protected against it but. thats life i guess, u leave the house one or two times masked up hand sanitizer ready to go sweating from being overheated wearing clothes that cover as much of ur skin as u can stand and other people just Dont. so. i knew it would probably happen to me eventually i just was really hoping it would not! but. i will continue surviving as best i can because i dont have any other option or choice. but that is why i've unintentionally been distant here and online in general. it was already extremely difficult getting myself out of bed and taling showers and changing clothes and brushing my teeth and remembering to eat food and drink water before but now its reached a difficulty that i literally can't have any control over most of the time and its a lot of physical/mental/emotional effort to even tap reblog on a post online or respond to a text more so than it was previously. which again was already. very difficult to power through.

anyways! uh! yeah. life update i guess. i hope you guys are genuinely doing much better than i am this year and i hope you're all able to stay safe and as relatively healthy as you can. and please please please please at the very least wear some form of a face mask in public even if you're outside and not in a tiny building. i dont say that to shame anyone here i just feel like there are a lot of well meaning good people who arent fully aware that in the US at least the pandemic is very much not over and people like myself are suffering and dying because of that and we cant be the only group of people that are still doing our best to stay protected when we have to leave the house. if you're able to get some i highly recommend N95 type face masks because supposedly they offer one of the best chances of protection as long as you're wearing it correctly and it fits your face well; there's a really great non-profit organization called Project N95 that has an official website and a huge list of various face masks in a bunch of different sizes and types to order if you don't know where to find some high quality ones and they also have a form you can fill out and submit to request an order of free masks if you can't afford to buy them; their money donation pool goes towards providing masks (and some air purifiers i think?) to low income people/organizations/work places that doesn't have the funds or resources to constantly buy expensive batches of masks and their website is super detailed and well organized and has a long list of visual and written resources and information about different mask types, ways you can help keep yourself/your community safe, etc. so i highly recommend them if you are like me and are very stressed and anxious and confused about all of that information all the time. their site should be the at the top of the search results if you google N95 Project, it has a dot org site url so thats another way you can tell its the official site.

[schizopositivity]

Hi there. First, I love your blog and have been finding it very helpful lately. Second, I just wanted some insight on what I'm currently going through. A traumatic event happened to me recently and I'm still dealing with the aftermath, it feels like it's made all my symptoms get worse and caused some old ones to resurface again, and I'm scared of things getting worse. The most convenient counseling available to me (in terms of the location and price) doesn't deal with more severe mental health conditions. They told me not to go back to them because they could only handle things like mild circumstantial depression and stress. So now I am trying to get back into long term therapy with a professional who'd be more equipped to handle cases like mine, but in the meantime, what coping mechanisms do you suggest just to keep me afloat for a while until I can access a professional again?

I don't want to get too detailed and unintentionally trigger anyone, but basically my intrusive thoughts have gotten especially bad (in all senses - frequency, intensity, how graphic/detailed they get), my "unhealthy beliefs" are becoming more obvious to the people around me and it's been interfering with my daily functioning, some other stuff has been going on that's hard to put into words tbh and overall it feels like my brain never gets a break from itself since it's so damn "loud" and it feels like the thoughts won't shut off. Sorry since I realize this is kind of a heavy topic, please don't feel pressured but if you have any resources or just advice from your own experience about how to cope with this for a while, I'd appreciate it a lot, please. I'm currently not a danger to myself or others because I do have family with me and they watch after me (check in on me, monitor my meds, etc.) but there is still that "divide" between me and them where they don't fully grasp what I'm going through and it just feels like hell inside of my own brain. Thank you.

first off im really sorry you went through something traumatic recently. you didnt deserve that or the after effects you got from it. i went through something traumatic earlier this year and it also made my symptoms worse, so youre not alone in that.

heres one resrouce, you can click on "what should i do if i experienced a traumatic event?"

as for dealing with intrusive thoughts, one thing i do is right after they happen i think to myself "obviously thats not what im thinking" or "clearly thats not my real conscious thoughts" as a way to dismess them as just intrusive thoughts and not anything to do with how i really feel. to discredit them and not give them any deeper meaning.

id also encourage you to talk more to your family and friends, to really open up and tell them the truth and how youre feeling and what youre thinking. most people want to know whats really going on with their loved ones. plus you never know what kind of advice and support they could offer until you open up. and maybe if talking isnt an easy way to show your emotions maybe do it through drawings or poetry, or even showing them a song or movie you relate to right now.

i wish you luck on getting the professional help you deserve. and if its possible, dont settle for someone you dont feel comfortable talking to or someone that isnt equipted to handle your problems. you wont offend a therapist/counselor/psychiatrist by changing to a different one, its their job to help you and if they cant its totatally normal and appropraite to switch to someone else, they dont take it personally.

[dancing-cockroaches]

I'm really disappointed in the state of Nevada for having no good haunted house experiences. Or if they do, for not popping up on my phone as some sort of ad or shady craigslist listing. You are telling me we have this large Hills Have Eyes creepy-ass state and we're just using none of it. That the people who had the resources to actually make a haunted house decided, "why use a creepy ghost town or literally anywhere else when we can use the IKEA parking lot". I admit my idea may be a bit over the top but I'm just disappointed no one tried some form of it.

Well sharks, I present an idea to you today. I suggest we set up a "creepy ghost town tour". And we make it seem like just that. An extreme ghost town tour that's like a fully interactive/immersive haunted house outdoor escape experience. Instead there's a twist. No, not actual ghosts. It is not actually a ghost town at all. Because it's actually inhabited by a cult. Of course they're just actors, unless there actually is a cult already there, anyone who's actually driven through Nevada knows what I mean when I say that may be a risk. And if that happens we're still gonna roll with it because these people came for an experience and goddamnit they're going to get one.

As for the exact location, there is a lot to choose from, but we dont want one that's too well known. Some other tourist company probably already have their hands on it, and I'm not good with legal stuff so it's best if it's one that has been forgotten about for so long no one with authority will realize I'm using it. Preferably one you cant even find on a list, so some scouting may be required, but trust me they're out there I highly doubt theyre all accounted for. Especially in Nye considering it feels like almost nobody lives there to this day despite it being the largest county. Most people who work there dont even live there.

Getting there may be an issue for participants. "Oh I dont like driving in the desert it's boring and theres no radio reception blah blah blah" and most tourists dont have a car here anyway. Because let's be real, anyone who has money to actually have fun in Las Vegas are tourists but we will have a local discount. So we offer an option to be transported by van, where there will also be a tour guide to begin the experience by giving a brief (embellished) history of this ghost town. The people who decide to drive will also get the history at some point.

So now they're at the ghost town. I guess now is as good time as any to bring up a problem I forgot to mention earlier. When discussing this with my husband, he pointed out "this is an open carry state" there will be a strict no gun rule "this is a concealed carry state" we will have those "beep beep beep" security wands so people can be scanned as they enter "what about bugs and pests" Nevada desert is home to the most devilish of insects, including vinegaroons and camel spiders, the area will be treated by an exterminator. Of course that probably wont work so possible encounter with insects the size of a Honda will be included in the waiver. Oh yes, there will be a waiver, this is an immersive experience so it'd be necessary. Technically, the possibility of being jumped by a dark jerusalem cricket or giant crab spider is terrifying and would add to the horror.

So the tour goes as a normal ghost town tour for about an hour or so, but there are cult members lurking around. But not in a way that makes themselves seen, more like a "it feels like there's an unseen presence here" way. Until the tour leads directly to one of their rituals. Which no, won't be a giant burning totem or loud chanting, atleast not every time because that's tacky. Just a group of robed, or half naked, or what the hell fully naked because this is a 21+ experience, people just sitting quietly together cross legged with their eyes closed. The cult never notices the group at first so the tour guide acts concerned in a way where they didnt know about these people but want to keep the group calm so they try to hurry out, but that's when the cult notices. More members show up to surround the tour group. The cult either acts very aggressive or very nice in a creepy/manipulative way. And I mentioned the experience will have some changes to it at times, because people are blabber mouths and the twist will come out so we dont want it getting stale. Anyway blah blah blah I've been going on for long enough, that's all I have for now

[entiish]

why are minor fcs not allowed in the rpc? no one out here that i've seen is rping nsfw with minor characters...

hi, it’s skye.   hey anon, this is kinda a complex question so lemme just give you my theory on why people are hyper cautious, it's still gonna be looooong but you asked me and i go off lmao. first off, i gotta disagree with you respectfully anon bc there are people in the rpc (we don't claim them) who roleplay usfw content with actors who are underage at the time, some people don't even use resources and just use the platform for taboo shit. it's real, it happens and yeah, it's a thing, ive seen it and dealt with it. we rlly can't be ignorant of those people who still use tumblr for gross shit, but we can do everything we can to stop them when we find em. i’m so so glad you’ve never come across it or had to be exposed by it, im truly thankful, you are not ignorant for not being aware or exposed!! but it is a real ting and it’s bad when it comes across your dash or into your inbox or roleplay in any form, i cant be any more honest w you right now. i dealt with it twice in one roleplay, each time even though i was swift and ruthless and not having it and did my duty as admin, i was mentally taxed to a mASSIVE degree. and they were not the first nor only times.

so, onto ur question in general, i agree that kids are IRL so kids naturally exist in the RP worlds we create. that's a fact, you can't create a world without having children in some capacity. but that doesn't mean you need to WRITE and PLAY a child.      and here is where i think this blanket mentality and rule has come from in the rpc and content creating community, speaking as someone who's almost 28 and has been in the rpc since i was about 14/15.

not all people have good intentions!!! not all people are decent and moralistic and have respect. and that's the plain and simple truth, i've seen too much shit on this platform in however many years ive been haunting it, and hella people who create resources (myself included) know/have seen the sad truth that some try or succeed in using underage resources to portray unsavoury things, i don't need to be explicit, but we know there is a nasty lil underbelly of people who still think it's "okay because it's not real". NO, i am absolutely wholeheartedly NOT implying thats you anon, nor anyone else who is curious on this topic. not at all 🙏🏾 —— however this means, to protect ourselves, lines must be drawn for what we personally deem appropriate for ourselves, the community, friends, fellow users, all of us, which has lead to this commonplace rule in the rpc.

now bear with me, because i have played characters who were underage (for me, aus, that is under eighteen), i had six characters in this world when i was around 17yo myself, also underage. one was seventeen and then one was a twelve year old, i played these characters within the moralistic and reasonable bounds, like you would write a character in a book. this world was based in the survival post/apoc world. and yah it was rather wholesome to form bonds with elder characters, to have them learn and develop... at that time, the seventeen year old was relative to my age and was very much an outlet for me — tbh i still use this muse, but she as aged as i have, and as for the younger one, there was no question that i was going to actually respect the age capacity as did everyone in this roleplay, it was an amazing and respectful community i still remember nearly a decade on. i had no ulterior motive, i just wanted a challenge outside of my normal bounds, but i also did not use resources because i didnt think it was needed. ig thats just a personal thing for me? who knows. at the time i was personally a minor, and i don’t speak for the underage rpers out there though i was one, but at the time it was not something that was a blanket rule anyway and not for the community who was underage themselves.

so we jump ahead now, as an adult, a decade later, a we've all learned a lot and become more aware and educated on HELLA stuff; whats appropriate and whats not, what we personally find ok and so forth. my next milstone is 30 (rip) and i have no desire to play the role of a child; even in a world that would expect such, even in a world that i create, even in genres where it is completely reasonable and normal to have characters under eighteen. the moralistic side must come out where we, as adults, have to consider... "why do we need to play a muse underage when we know, on the real, it's not necessary to a roleplay experience?" the answer is, we don't. adults don't need to create and pilot a child character, or a teenager, really. maybe on the sims, or in a video game, in your own time, but not really here. and to be honest if your muse is a late teen, then why not simply age them up that year or two? it changes very little in the grand scheme of things.

however, i stand on the grounds that you can have NPC children, many of my muses have had children of their own in game, they can certainly have casted faces if you are into family graphics, comprehensive masterlists and the like (i def am) but only use child actors who have consented to have their face shared, and continue to respect ethnic backgrounds my dawgs ofc. (i made that decision as an admin, with the support of my rpers after i asked their opinions & in a genre where many of our adult characters had children or even younger siblings of note.) and look i even believe in writing little interactions within your replies if your character is a parent or guardian as kids usually pipe up and react and i feel that can add authenticity when relevant, but they are always NPCS (non playable characters). there is nothing inherently wrong, generally speaking, with acknowledging the children in our characters lives and worlds; our characters could be teachers, parents, elder siblings, paediatricians, and thats 10/10 great.    BUT, and this is where it all comes back to in the rpc community these days & reasonably so... non playable characters such as children do not need a plethora of resources. especially not when, even though we might revere and celebrate their performances and we want to hope everyone is good deep down, we cannot and do not risk putting out resources that can be abused.  for me?? i will never stop honouring and revering and GASSING UP the child actors who eat/have eaten the screen, i will make gifsets of them, i will hype them, i have so many movies that inspired me as a child that i’ll honour in my own lil giffing way, but i wont turn them into what will be a barely-accessed resource that could be used for something unspeakably nasty. i wont put my name or soul anywhere near that hellfire zone i know exists 🙅🏽‍♀️🙅🏽‍♀️🙅🏽‍♀️  and i also dont feel the need to anyway

maaaaany creators choose not gif people underage, whether 18 or 21, and they have the right to do so as they are the creators, particularly fellow adult creators. many admins choose not to include people underage, and they have the right to as the creator and admin of a world. i, as a whole ass adult, do not feel comfortable doing that personally, i don't think any adult should be playing a character that is underage, mainly because i don't see a reason why is needed and also because i dont think there is a storyline to sustain me unless i was doing some sort of time jump; children shouldn't be exposed to adult things when you are on a public and open forum. that's my personal stance. it really comes down to this, it's your choice. if you sincerely want to write a character who is underage in some way and you sincerely want to respect and do this character accurate justice and challenge your writing chops like i did, it would be up to you to create the resources, or you to create and take on the burden of monitoring a world as admin where anyone can try and rationalise some whack shit and you have no warning or heads up, IT HAPPENS. A LOT OKAY. (*flashbacks fr* 🤢) OR you can find someone who feels comfortable writing like that and do a private 1x1 to explore the dynamic or storyline or world, tbh perhaps write without resources? bc that doesn't diminish anything as a creator. hell, go write one-shots, write stories, write novellas and let your creativeness grow!!! many authors write children's/underage/teen characters, that is not weird, in my own writing time i do. however it is weird to demand that others create or interact with what they feel is a personal boundary, it is weird to gaslight people into thinking they’re hyper-fixated on the bad things by having a personal boundary like this, i’ve seen that a whole lot for some reason.     as it seems, most the rpc that i personally interact with are well into adulthood alongside me and share that personal and moral boundary that we don’t wanna dabble, as is our right. it also seems that the majority of people in the rpc have that same boundary. it’d also posit that the reason why it might seem a bit staunch and all that shit is because the damn boundary keeps getting pushed on. i srsly don't think any of us would be this extreme and strict on it if the personal preference and boundary hadn't been disrespected so many times, or if we hadn’t been exposed to the nasty side of tumblr where we see it happening.

also, if you weren't here on the platform, there was a seriously horrid period of months and months a few years back where legions of fuckheads were bombarding the tags of the rpc with every DAMNED trigger in the WORLD (all the nasty, all the trauma, it was visual and vivid and horrid, it was a full on attack weaponising our tagging system, i dont wish it on anyone). i went through it and we all came out very traumatised from that, personally that is one of the events that makes my boundary and rule so strict. as well as like... TOO much personal experience.

look tbhtbh i'm a bit tired and kinda stoned rn, so i hope this rambling makes some sense, i have a lot of thoughts and theories on this, i don't speak for ANYONE else so again this is just my pov and my theory as a rper, admin, rpc homie, gifmaker, whatever you want to call me. it all comes down to is respect and choice. and i respect that there are people out there - rpers, authors, creators of all kinds - who write from an underage POV (harry potter, fkn twilight, the secret garden, ASOIAF, little nightmares, the last of us, i could srsly go on and on), and i respect everyone, including myself, who’s choice it is to set that boundary and stick to it 🫶🏾 i hope maybe i shed some light on one perspective.