#believe it or not i started this the day before the stream lmao

[its-short-for-jackalope]

there's no apotheosis, they're just Like This

click for quality!

a discord buddy wanted to see Emma tormented by Zoey and her theater friends at work, aka why I think Emma deserves to be the murderer in Cast Party Massacre. /hj

[danieyells]

I don't know if you've done it yet but I would like to request Ren lines? I'm having tokyo debunker Ren brainrot bro 😭.

@otomelover23

You're all very welcome! I love you guys too, so far! Sorry you've been deprived of lazy boi lolol HOPEFULLY THESE SATISFY YOU A LITTLE BIT.

He's a little tsundere I think. He's one of those characters who just wants to be normal but he can't just pretend to be normal because he lives surrounded by chaos so he just complains a lot lolol. . .but i think he's a good guy. Aside from that he does not help his mother captain at all.

Hello: (the first time the game is opened after that character is set as home screen NPC. Only happens once per day, unless the character is switched out and back.)

"Great, shift change. I'm gonna head out then... What? Do I really need to be here for that?"

You've Got Mail: (whenever there's something in the inbox, usually Arena rewards)

"I think you've got a notification... Aren't you going to look at it?"

Default: (requires no affinity, has no time constraints)

"Who did I disappoint in a past life to end up in Jabberwock... There's no general students or even a single other sane person, and these jumpsuits are a crime..."

"Why do I have to look after all these weird-ass animals? This is forced labor...  Ugh, they're so gross..."

"If you're just gonna stand there, could you go feed the animals in the aquatic zone?  I'm too busy."

"Ugh, why is that clown calling me... ... Whatever, I'll just let it ring out."

you know damn well that if you don't answer the phone you're gonna have to deal with Haru in person. Better to just answer it.

"Oh, hey... Could you open the link I sent you? No, you don't have to sign up or anything. Thanks."

Affinity 1: (between 5am and 11am)

"Ugh... Tell me how I'm supposed to sit through classes when I've been up since 4 AM? (yawn) I'm exhausted..."

well if you didn't stay up until 4am--oh who am i kidding i stayed up til like 3 watching a stream and reading datamine stuff and then I got up at like 6:30 to get ready for work I'm no better kekw.

Affinity 2: (between 11am and 4pm)

"Ugh... I can't believe I'm hiding right now... Why the hell does that clown have to chase me around at lunch time too?"

Affinity 3: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"Preach about doing it for the sake of your friends or the animals or whatever all you want— I really don't give a shit. People who say that stuff are just deluding themselves."

i've known people with this kind of cynicism before. once he finds people care about him and a little more stability he'll come around a little more.

Affinity 4: (between 8pm and 5am)

"Huh? I can't see that clown anywhere... Hell yes. Gonna get through my watch list. I hope he never comes back."

Affinity 5: (between 8pm and 5am)

"I'm grinding this game on my phone, so could you not talk to me for a while? Crap, I think my RSI is flaring up..."

in Japanese he specifies tendonitis haha

Affinity 6: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"Don't people get embarrassed calling out those words when they use their stigmas? It makes them look like LARPers..."

in japanese he says they sound like they have chuunibyou which is much funnier imo lmao. also i guess that means he can say his in his head? since he'd feel embarrassed doing it aloud, maybe he's practiced already lol

Affinity 7: (between 11am and 4pm)

"You think I sigh a lot? Got a problem with that? You realize trying to take away people's freedom of speech is power harrassment, right?"

you're starting to sound like ritsu. gonna hurt yourself reaching like that.

Affinity 8: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"I'm so done... I'm out of HP... Shouldn't I be exempt from missions and classes since I'm looking after all those animals?"

well based on one of Haku's chats, you can just do missions if you don't go to class, and based on Kaito you can just go to class instead of doing missions. . .but I'm sure Haru forces him on missions anyway lol. . . .

Affinity 9: (between 8pm and 5am)

"Pfft... The video of that clown getting attacked by that hawk thing is getting so many interacts. This editing thing's actually pretty fun."

does editing count as a creative effort? i wouldn't be surprised if he switched to Hotarubi next year if so, assuming he doesn't get used to Jabberwock and the animals. Also why didn't he get stopped by Sophy for uploading a video with an anomaly? Unless he uploaded it to an Institute social media site like WickHive or something. . . .

Affinity 10: (between 10pm and midnight)

"Gotta change the locks so that clown can't get in again. I've bought enough padlocks to start my own business by now..."

life haru finds a way. sometimes that way is "towa, break down the door" if he runs out of lockpicking equipment.

Affinity 11: (between 5am and 11am)

"My head's killing me... This is the worst... Rise and shine! my ass... It's basically still the middle of the night. Guess I should padlock my windows..."

5-6am I can understand being 'basically the middle of the night' but after that you're pushing it lmao

Affinity 12: (between 11am and 4pm)

"The cafeteria's way over capacity... The assholes who save seats before its even noon are ruining it for everyone else..."

Affinity 13: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"Why's my pay so low... huh? What's this deduction for? "Consultation Fee: Ritsu Shinjo..." He's seriously charging me for complaining...?"

Ritsu charges for looking at him too long. i'd try venting on wickhive over complaining to Ritsu.

Affinity 14: (between 5am and 11am)

"That rabbit sure has it good. All it has to do is breathe and everyone fawns over it. Doesn't even have to feed itself. Just wait till it grows up and learns what the world's really like."

WELL BASED ON THAT THE ADULT PEEKABOO WAS STILL BEING FAWNED OVER AND HARU HAD TO STOP PEOPLE FROM PETTING IT BECAUSE IT BITES. . .IT'LL PROBABLY STILL HAVE IT GOOD. Haru takes good care of the animals.

Affinity 15: (between 5am and 11am)

"Sup... Huh? I'm alone today. I just got up on my own since if I don't that clown'll wake me up anyway."

yeah? it's because of haru? not because of your affinity with the pc being more than half so you wanna be up earlier to spend more time with them? sure.

Affinity 16: (between 11am and 4pm)

"Oof, nearly missed the noon raid...  Not like I'll have any time to myself once I get back to the dorm, so I guess I should do it now..."

Affinity 17: (between 10pm and midnight)

"No, I'm not going to sleep yet. I'm gonna watch a horror B-movie. You don't have to think, so they're the perfect thing to watch before bed."

i used to watch/listen to mts3k to go to sleep so. i feel this.

Affinity 18: (between 8pm and 5am)

"Well done me for surviving another day... Oh, same to you too, {PC}. I don't how you can do this stuff voluntarily."

SOME PEOPLE JUST LIKE ANIMALS DAWG.

Affinity 19: (between 10pm and midnight)

"Huh? I'm going to the campus store to buy some stuff, where are you going? Well, I'm going that way, so...bye."

not sure if shy or asocial lmao. could be both!

Affinity 20: (between 5am and 11am)

"You're being forced to help out again? Wow, a doormat out in the wild. So? Where do you want me to carry all this food?"

he's helping you even though he doesn't wanna work. HE'S GOT IT BAD.

Affinity 21: (between 11am and 4pm)

"This? It's a video I uploaded. People seem really into it. It's of that clown getting chased by a dog and flailing around like one of those inflatable air dancers."

Affinity 22: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"What am I doing today? Working at the diner. Oh, if you want to keep me company, feel free to come by. As long as you serve yourself."

it's not a date or anything since he's at work but like. . .he is inviting you to hang out. . . .

Affinity 23: (between 8pm and 5am)

"Huh? You were waiting for me to get off work? Oh... Thanks. Wait, that clown put you up to this?! I'm gonna kill him..."

NO NO WE CAME HERE WILLINGLY probably. although it does seem like Haru to be like "oh hey Ren really really likes you, you should go pick him up from work! he'd love that!!" like a real nosy mom who's trying to get his son together with his crush.

Affinity 24: (between 10pm and midnight)

"When did it get this late? That was horrifyingly fast... I'll walk part of the way back with you. I was gonna go buy something to drink anyway..."

excuses, excuses. . . .

Affinity 25(max): (no time constraints)

"Every day here is a fresh hell, sure, but... You're suffering through it with me, so I guess I'll stick it out a little longer..."

'this sucks but you make it suck a little(a lot) less so i can keep going'. yep, that's our tsundere alright!

Spring: (March-May) (between 5am and 11am)

"That clown's even more slap-happy than usual lately—it's horrible. Has he got spring fever or something?"

(between 11am and 4pm)

"Otonashi keeps trying to make me drink some kind of rice porridge with weird flowers in it... It's actual porridge harassment."

considering the flower Towa associates with Ren is poisonous, i think it's safe to assume he is literally trying to poison him to death lmao. also wtf is porridge harassment--i even tried looking it up in japanese and the first thing that came up was someone screenshotting it and saying "what is porridge harassment" lolol

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"All this farm labor's bad enough without all the caterpillars and weird plants that are out there now...This is harassment."

what's harassing you, nature? as someone who just had to kill a huge mosquito that came into my room, nature is harassing me too.

(between 8pm and 5am)

"I hate cherry blossoms. They're like the flower version of being a legacy kid— all they have to do is bloom once a year and everyone claps."

in japanese what he says is something like 'i hate them just like people born with silver spoons in their mouths'. basically he hates people born into privilege lol i bet he'd have the potential to get along well with haku until he learns he'll be inheriting a shrine. . .then again he's getting along with Ritsu in their own little way

Summer: (June-August) (between 5am and 11am)

"This is the worst... It's not even noon yet, how is it so hot? Summer is for extroverts and party animals, I wish it could just be over already..."

(between 11am and 4pm)

"A group trip to the beach? I'd rather die. No decent person would ever go there of their own free will."

butbutbut. think of the summer skins!!!

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"Summer was our busy period back home, so I always had to kill myself helping out. Now I'm here though... nothing's changed."

. . .did Ren's family run some sort of seaside shop??? And he happened to end up afraid of the ocean and hating aquatic creatures and such?

(between 8pm and 5am)

"How can the A/C be banned in the dorm...? Who gives a shit what temperature some anomalous animal that sneaks in prefers, humans should come first..."

okay i agree with him here though what the fuck kind of rule is that. can we talk to hyde about that, that's insane haru.

Autumn: (September-November) (between 5am and 11am)

"Now it's getting colder, I nearly found myself feeling grateful for this tragic jumpsuit... Am I being brainwashed...?"

(between 11am and 4pm)

"Fall, the season of the harvest—I'll stick with cup noodles, thanks. "Fall, the season to enjoy the outdoors"—screw that. I'm gonna make it the season of naps."

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"Look—I got bitten by some weird bug anomaly. To hell with the stupid bug spray ban, I'm buying some."

(between 8pm and 5am)

"I feel like the mountains are rowdier when there's a full moon. Pretty sure my enemy encounter rate goes up when I'm on patrol too... Maybe I'm just imagining it."

is 'enemy encounter rate' here referring to people or anomalies. . .because if it's people then that's just because of tsukimi. . .although I wouldn't be surprised if there were a lot of anomalies or anomalies were more active on full moons.

Winter: (December-February) (between 5am and 11am)

"There's less patrols in winter but anything involving water like washing up gets even worse... Ugh, I wish I could hibernate too..."

(between 11am and 4pm)

"Since the climate in Jabberwock's so messed up, sometimes it's actually warm in winter. The blizzards are way stronger though..."

have you tried pissing towa off less?

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"Oh god, I just saw what's in the diner's new Mystery Hot Pot... It's gotta be a matter of time before this place goes bust..."

i mean if they had ordinary health inspectors maybe lolol

(between 8pm and 5am)

"That clown broke my window so my room's like a freezer... Oh, don't worry. I just took his room instead."

lmao imagine Ren invites you to hang out and takes you to Haru's room instead of his like nah he broke my window so i'm using his room and he can freeze.

His birthday: (July 25th)

"You got this for me? That clown's been spreading my personal info around... No, it's fine, I'll still take it. Thanks."

i guess he doesn't really tell people his birthday, huh.

Your birthday:

"Happy birthday, {PC}. ...Isn't it kind of rude to look so surprised I'd celebrate your birthday? That came from the heart, you know."

I MEAN YOU NORMALLY DON'T CARE ABOUT ANYTHING. . .it's happy surprise!!!

New Years: (January 1st)

"Happy New Year. My resolution? Escaping the hell hole that is Jabberwock, for starters."

well you got here in like September or something so. you've got a while befor eyou can switch houses lmao but you can do it this year!

Valentine's Day: (February 14th)

"You got me chocolates? You're the type who does all this kind of stuff, huh? No, it's fine, you went to the trouble and everything so I'll take them."

i love when characters kinda mock you for doing getting them something but then they're like "nonono i want it gimme--" lolol from Ren especially it's very tsundere. poor guy wouldn't be straightforward about his feelings unless a damn life was on the line.

White Day: (March 13th)

"{PC}... Here, if you want them. I just bought the first thing I saw, so don't read into it..."

i bet it's actually really nice lolol

April Fool's Day: (April 1st)

"Guess what? I got special permission to switch houses. That nightmare is now behind me! I wish..."

Halloween: (October 31st)

"I hope everyone who gets excited about Halloween lives in misery for the rest of their lives. Why the hell do I have to help out with this stupid themed tour?"

Christmas: (December 25th)

"Can I ask you a question, {PC}? You don't still believe in Santa Claus, do you? Never mind, it doesn't matter. Have a good Christmas."

i mean. . .after coming here santa is a plausible entity to believe in. . .if there's gonna be a santa i don't wanna be caught not believing and missing out on gifts. . . .

Idle: (about 20 seconds without interacting with the game) (below 13 affinity)

"Where'd she go...? Whatever. Guess I'll catch up on some of my games."

(13 affinity and above)

"Pfft... This edit's awesome. I'm a genius. I'll show {PC} when she gets back."

true bonding is sharing the funny memes you worked hard on. . . .

Absent: (logging in for the first time in 2 or more days?)

"It's not like I was waiting for you or anything. It's just this hell hole is even more unbearable when you're not around..."

YEP THAT'S OUR UNFORTUNATE CUSTOMER SERVICE EMPLOYEE TSUNDERE ALRIGHT. His lines don't really get super affectionate but. They still have a charm to them when you realize how much he hides his feelings in the usual tsundere way. He likes you a lot but like. . .it's a bother and it's embarrassing. . .and what're the chances you're into him? He'll just invite you over to watch movies and play games with him and stuff. . .and tell himself it's fine to just be friends until it eats away at him. . .or until Haru spills the beans for him--

this took way too long because i got distracted like three times in the middle and my laptop started freaking out and i had to figure out why and close and reopen everything about 8 times hahaha. . . . OKAY TIME FOR ME TO GO TO BED! I hope this satisfies you a little bit!!

[fredwkong]

Alphaworld File 3: Diary of an Alpha Transformation (1 of ?)

Click here to read Alphaworld in posting order.

X

An undated journal. It is heavily bedazzled on the covers, though many of the gems appear to have been scraped off or stepped on. There are several stains yellowing the coloured paper of the cover, mostly sweat.

Inside the front cover, there is a space where the owner is encouraged to write their name. Two names occupy the space, one on top of the other. The lower layer is written with a purple marker, neatly spelling the name “Ronaldo Herrera.” There are multicoloured sparkles drawn around the name, and glitter has been sprinkled over it. Some of the glitter appears to have been scraped off with a knife, and there is a 3 centimetre tear at the top interior of the page, as if someone was about to rip it out. On top of the first name, the name “RONNIE H” is scrawled in crude capitals using a pencil. The pencil was applied with sufficient force that graphite scrapes are visible from where they were brushed off the page.

Journal entries flow into each other without dating, but editors have split entries based on context and labelled them “Day One, Day Two, Day Three…” despite the fact that more than one day clearly proceeds between some entries. From this point onward, journal entries are transliterated directly, with marginalia and other notes on the text rendered in square brackets [] to distinguish them from the main body.

[Day One]

OMG, I’m soooo happy to be back on campus! Staying with my parents is such a bore! They don’t let me stream any of my shows, they say drag race is of the devil, and the town is so small that I’m, like, the only twink there. I can’t even get any dl dick all holiday because country guys are all totally masc for masc. My hole is toooootally desperate.

I’m so happy that Ollie across the hall got me this journal! He made it look soooo cute with all the stones! He’s, like, okay for a fellow bottom, even tho his massive crush on me is, like, totally obvious. Sorry babe, this dick is for decoration only lmao! Maybe we could get tag teamed by a big dick boy sometime, that’d be pretty hot. I've never bottomed alongside a transmasc dude.

Anyway, I just stopped at the dorm to drop off my suitcase and get out of my het drag, there’s a whole lotta frat parties starting tonight and if I wanna end my dry spell I’ve gotta be there! I just had to live my Sex and the City fantasy by putting down a few lines in the diary first!

[a doodle of an open-faced journal with scribbly lines on the page in rainbow colours]

[Day Two]

ZOMGGGGGGG [written in double-tall bubble letters across a quarter of the page, filled in with pink highlighter]

This term is gonna be SO AWESOME.

Campus is suddenly full of massive muscle men who are totally desperate for me! I was, like, totally the target of a dominance contest at the party last night, and it was SO HOT.

So I walk in, right? And I’m dressed in my usual, my lil slutty crop and my littlest shorts. Here, I took a pic before I left so you can see how cute I was.

Anyway, I’m cute, I’m obvious, I’m ready to have any guy absolutely wreck me. Like, last night, I would have taken a bicurious frat bro fucking me raw, my hole was so neglected. So I am a blaring neon sign: I’M A FAG [written in rainbow marker colours]

And as soon as I walk in, this GOD [a doodle of a massive man is in the margin, a perfect X shape covered in cartoonishly bulging muscles] comes up to me and is all, “Hey boy, I’m Nate.” He. Is. PERFECT. Gorgeous grey eyes, windswept dirty blond hair, a tank top hugging pecs the size of my HEAD. And his voice gets me tooootally weak in the knees. I can't believe he's LOOKING at lil ol me, even if I do look like a twinky slut.

But before I can even say anything to Nate, there’s another MASSIVE arm draped over my shoulder, and ANOTHER massive guy is whispering in my ear, like, “Name’s Lee. Want a drink?” I look over, and he’s just as hot as Nate, with shiny black hair and this perfect sexy smile like a J-pop star. But, like, if a J-pop star was 250 pounds of pure muscle and sex.

I swear all the air went out of the room. Suddenly, Nate and Lee were glaring at each other over me, and all these frat bros were staring.

BTW, when did all the frat bros get so cuuuute? Like, not as sexy as Nate and Lee, but they’re all totally cut this term and I think they’ve got some skincare going? Like I wanna go back sometime lmao.

Lee, like, GROWLED as he glared across me. I felt a li-ter-al rumble from his chest. Nate started totally flexing his big pecs, I thought his shirt was gonna shred in the middle. They didn’t even SAY anything, it was so totally primal. I think I got a whiff of Lee as he tucked me closer to his chest, and I realised he totally doesn’t use deodorant. He smelled totally HAWT.

Anyway, I have two perfect men fighting over me, and I’m not letting either of them go, so I go, “Boys, I promise my holes are big enough to share.” I totes flashed my dimples at them. [doodle of a smiley face]

They kept glaring at each other, but finally Lee was like, “I get his hole.” Maybe he, like, won the contest or whatever? Because Nate looked down at the floor and said, “Fine.” And I mean, fine with me! I love getting stuffed from both ends! What a way to come back from vacay!

We didn’t stay at the party long, just long enough for Lee to get me a drink and Nate to carry me around the dance floor a bit. I checked on Lee while we were dancing, and he was, like, totally making out with one of the frat bros. Like, a guy I knew was straight. I blew him freshman year when his gf was away. I guess Lee’s just like that, lmao.

We ended up upstairs. I think Lee’s in the frat? But we weren’t in his room, which was kinda hot. Lee and Nate sandwiched me between them as soon as we were through the door. I was tooootally surrounded by massive muscle as Nate made out with me and Lee sucked on my neck. I felt, like, high, with Nate’s big cock grinding into my belly through his jeans while Lee felt up my cute ass.

“You guys kissing would be so hot,” I gasped as Nate pulled off my shirt and Lee took off my shorts.

They both hesitated, I could feel it. “Oh c’mon,” I moaned, “you’re both tooootally hot, and you haven’t touched at allllll.”

Suddenly, Lee picked me up and threw me on a random frat bro’s bed. “I guess your mouth IS gonna be busy,” he said, which was SOOO hot, and then he started slicking up my hole.

Pretty soon, both hunks were balls deep in me. They were SOOOOOO big [doodles of massive, soft cocks cover the margins of this page] and I took ALL of them. Lee filled me up SO good, rubbing my prostate like he was fingering me. And Nate tasted, like, perfect. And the whole time, Nate kept pulling back just far enough that I could watch him and Lee kissing over me.

FUCK, they made me look like a little doll between them! I think once they were in me, all the dominance stuff went away, because they were TOTALLY making out. Nate’s, like, SO noisy, and Lee kept on doing that growl thing like he’d done before, which made me moan around Nate’s cock, which made him even noisier.

I came handsfree right before Lee flooded my ass and Nate filled my mouth with cum.

By the time our clothes were back on, Lee and Nate were back to playing their weird dick measuring game, keeping me between them as we went back to the party. I think Nate left pretty soon, but I danced for a bit longer and made out with a few frat bros. They really ARE super cute now, and they all seemed totally into me. Guess they finally got over being raging fucking homophobes lmao.

Anyway, I got home and crashed as soon as I’d cleaned all the cum and sweat off. Now my hand’s all crampy from writing for so long lol. Oooh, I should go tell Ollie all about it!

[Day Three]

I was, like, SO right.

The last few days have been AWESOME!!!! [jagged star doodles all around the word] I swear there are soooo many hunks on campus all of a sudden! One of my profs this term is a tooootal musclestud.

So I’m taking this class on fashion history, and when I looked it up, this Prof. Romano guy was listed for it. He was cute, one of those cute tweed aesthetic guys. You know, a fag who studies fashion. Like, OMG, that picture must be SO OLD.

I show up for class all ready to sit in the back row, but then I see this MAN standing at the podium. Like, total Italian stallion, with the dark waves and the stubbly jaw. He was, like, BURSTING out of his blazer. I could watch his pec bounce through three layers of fabric.

So obv I run down and sit in the front row. I’m not the first fag to have the idea, there’s already like 3 other twinks down there, but I’m totally the cutest. As the rest of the class comes in and sits down, these two GORGEOUS boys walk in and go up to the prof. They’re totally shredded, and dressed in complementary button-ups. And the muscle-god prof pats each of them on the head! Then they go sit down in some chairs behind the podium, and I can see their boners in their cute slacks.

The prof clears his throat, and it’s this DEEP, RESONANT sound. I got a total eargasm just listening to the rumble. “Good morning, class,” he says. And then his next words are TOTALLY burned into my brain:

[written in shaky block letters across a whole page] “You will call me Alpha Mario.”

And then he says, “I am your professor, and I will see you all for extra credit,” while rubbing himself through his pants, like half the class isn’t ready to have his babies. My cock was ROCK FUCKING HARD in my jeans. [doodle of a leaking penis]

He introduces his TAs as Beta Max and Beta Owen. IDK, maybe it’s a kink thing? He’s clearly their dom or something, they were totally devoted to him all class. I’d happily be Alpha Mario’s Beta if he’s hiring, lmao! [hearts are doodled around “Alpha Mario”]

Anyway, that’s just one ep in the PORN SHOW that is my life these days! Ollie’s room has been, like, a revolving door of cock since we got back, and I usually take two or three loads a day out on campus. This group of straight computer science geeks actually begged to fuck me yesterday, so I was dripping all the way home.

They were surprisingly buff for nerds, too! I should point out to Ollie that we gotta hit the gym if we wanna keep up with all the boys on campus this term. Can you imagine? Us at the gym! [The rest of the page is covered in stickers of the laughing emoji]

[Day Four]

Went to the gym today! Not to workout, but I had this new outfit idea and I thought it might get me noticed if I just hung out in the locker room. OH BOY, was I right!

Last few days all my clothes have been feeling super tight, so I’ve been doing a lot of [scribbled in rainbow marker] SHOPPING. It’s too bad, all my old clothes were suuuuper cute, but I’ve started giving some of my old faves to repeat fuckbuddies. One of the guys who used to push me around for being faggy, this guy called Brendan, has been coming over for the last few nights. I never realised how cute he is before!

Anyway, the first night Brendan came over he throatfucked me, but last night he told me he really wanted to feel my fingers in his hole, so I started fingering him! It was soooo hot that my cock ended up totally hard and before I knew it HE was blowing ME while I rubbed his prostate. He’s been texting me all day, begging to service my cock again. Lol, he just sent a voice message all like, “Please, Ronaldo, I’ll do anything to make you cum again!”

My point is I gave him a pair of my old booty shorts. They fit him perfectly, even though he NEVER had an ass as nice as mine before. He’s been wearing them all day today, just like I told him. It’s so hot, knowing he’s showing off like a fag even though he used to be a straight homophobe.

Fuck, I was writing about MY clothes! I’ve been so distracted by hot beta boys the last few days. I thought it was kinda time to change up my style, plus I looked super hot trying on some more dude-type clothes, so here’s the pic of me I took while I was hanging out at the gym.

I had guys HANGING OFF OF ME after a few minutes. It was totally hot, they wanted to do anything I said. Before long, I had a bunch of hot guys kissing me all over and all the cocks I could want to suck. Guys kept running out to grab their hot friends to join us, and all these guys were focussed on me.

At one point one of the staff came in, and I could tell it was to tell us to stop. He was a cute guy, really filled out his work polo, you know how gyms always hire swole dudes and curvy gurls to work at the front desk. I just gave him this LOOK from the middle of my pile of dudes, and I could feel his straightness melt away as his cock started leaking in his preppy shorts.

But just as I was about to cum, my cap got ripped off my head and I was dragged out of the pile by Nate, the guy from that frat party. I swear, he got even BIGGER since last time, he held me up by my shoulders like I was a paperweight. He was totally growling at me, too. He said something like, “I hate when they’re half done,” whatever that means, and then he yelled at all the other boys to get back to work.

Once we were along in the locker room, Nate shook me like a doll. “All the ex-het Betas can treat my gym as neutral ground, but it’s MY territory to you and the other half-done Alphas, you got it?” [note: Alpha and Beta are capitalised in the original text, although Ronnie does not seem to have been aware of the Alpha Phenomenon]

I was like “What are you talking about?”

Nate said, “You’ll get it.” Then I started smelling this INCREDIBLE smell. It was like really sharp cedar cologne mixed with fresh sweat. There was something else too, and it made me feel totally out of it.

Next thing I knew, I was on my knees swallowing Nate’s cock again. “Yeah,” he was saying while he fucked my throat, “this’ll speed you up. You’ll probably never submit again after this, so I’m gonna enjoy it.”

I just stayed there, taking him all the way into my throat. I feel like a week ago it would’ve been totally hot, but today it felt different. Nate using me made me MAD [underlined several times]. I felt like I should do something about it, like punch him or steal one of his boys, but the smell coming off of him kept me docile.

Nate came really quietly, which made me madder. My throat is an incredible tool, okay? Any guy should be screaming when I blow him, especially a noisy top like Nate. Then he patted me on the head like I was a little boy and said, “Head home. Drop a load in that guy who lives across from you, he should be progressing well too.” Then he just. Walked away.

I was gonna stay here all night just to spite the asshole, but I’m super horny again and I don’t wanna go back out. Maybe I’ll go see if Ollie’s got any visitors tonight or if he wants me to fill his holes for him.

[Day Five]

[From this point, entries are written in a noticeably heavier hand. Lowercase Es and Os become jagged.] Fuck, last night was fucking awesome. I knocked on Ollie’s door, and he answered in nothing but a thong, showing his bottom growth right through the fabric. His legs have been getting so hairy and thick, he looked super slutty. Plus his room smelled like sex and cum. I’ve been sleeping out, but seems like Ollie’s been taking house calls.

“Ronaldo?” he said, blinking up at me in surprise. I think we used to be a matching pair of little twinks, but guess I’ve had a growth spurt.

I shoved through the door. What was he gonna do, stop me? I was like, “Where’s your lube?” It came out of my mouth so deep, in a crazy manly register. “I wanna finger you.”

Ollie fuckin’ moaned when I said that, and stumbled over to his night table to grab it. He keeps his lube right out in the open, proud of how much cock he takes. I was already dropping my jeans, my cock was getting super hard and I hate feeling it strain. It deserves to be seen anyway.

Once I grabbed Ollie’s lube, he stood against the wall and presented his ass for me. Fuck, just remembering the look of all that hair on his fat ass is making me leak again. Okay I jerked a bit, should be able to write. [there is a stain on the page here]

Ollie’s hole was still loose from his last dick appointment, so I pushed three fingers in nice and easy. Ollie was moaning, all, “When did your fingers get so thick,” and “What’s happening to us, Ronaldo?” so I roughed up his G-spot a bit until he wasn’t being so articulate anymore.

“What’s happening to us is we’re gonna rule this school,” I hissed at him. I’d realised that it wasn’t gonna be enough to finger him and make him blow me. I needed to shoot inside his ass right fucking now. “Fags are in fucking charge here now.”

Fuck, wait, I need to text Brendan and get him over here. I need him milking my cock so I can focus on writing.

[There are several crude doodles of dicks, asses, and cum splatters in various marker colours before the entry continues on the facing page]

So anyway I slammed Ollie against the wall and shoved my cock into him. My cock’s so much fucking bigger now, too. Like it’s really filling up Brendan’s mouth while he sucks on me. I had enough cock to really saw at Ollie's asshole, and I felt him cum handsfree onto the wall.

“That’s it,” I growled in his ear as I had to hold him up. “This is what you’ve wanted ever since we became neighbours, right? Ollie wanted to get Ronnie’s big alpha dick in his hole.” It felt good to call myself a

[in massive letters on its own line] ALPHA

Ollie didn’t really say words at that point, just lots of “Yes” and “More.” I could hear his voice getting deeper with every thrust, too.

By the time I was getting close, Ollie’s room reeked like ME. It wasn’t a bad smell, but I knew any boy who came in here would be able to tell that all this musk and spice wasn’t just Ollie. It would take weeks for this to be really Ollie’s territory again now that I had marked it. “Fuck, show me that man pussy,” I ordered him, and threw him down in his bed.

Switching holes felt like the most natural thing in the world. I’m fucking built for topping, I can’t believe I thought I hated it. I fucked Ollie through a couple more orgasms and then let myself fill up his man pussy with what felt like 3 loads.

I fell asleep still inside him.

FUCK. I just came in Brendan’s mouth, and it felt totally different. Like, I marked Ollie’s room, but I didn’t mark HIM. His holes are open for anyone to fill. He can own other boys for all I care. But Brendan? Brendan’s fucking MINE. He’s mine he’s mine he’s mine. MY Brendan. [scribbled hastily] I need his hole NOW.

[written later]

I took a pic of Ollie before I started fingering him. I bet he looks totally different now, like me. Gotta go, MY Brendan’s gonna show me how to do a gym session.

To Be Continued...

[paisleypens]

teee heeee i’m backkkkkk

could we get where reader is also a streamer and they start streaming together (reader isn’t in cali) and they start a long distance maybe they meet at the end that’s up to you

spencers first minecraft date! | spencer agnew x reader

so so sorry i was gone for so long lmao the motivation was just not there. sorry this specific request took so long my love but im here to feed my smosh babes. also is the title giving a games title or? idk but i think i cooked lemme know

~~~

You adjusted your webcam and glanced at the chat as you booted up Minecraft. Today was the day you’d been waiting for—the launch of a new Minecraft server for twitch streamers. You'd been buzzing with excitement since the invite landed in your inbox a week ago, and your viewers seemed just as hyped.

“Hey, everyone!” you greeted as your screen transitioned to the familiar blocky landscape. “We’re jumping into this new Minecraft server today with a bunch of other streamers. I’m so pumped to meet everyone and see what chaos we can create!”

As you navigated through the spawn area, you noticed a few players running around—some of them big names you recognized from streams and videos. But one name stood out: Spencer Agnew. You’d known Smosh and even caught a few of his streams before and always appreciated his chill vibe and sharp humor.

“Yo, Y/N!” Spencer’s voice came through your headset, catching you off guard but making you smile.

“Hey, Spencer! Didn’t expect to run into you so soon,” you replied, trying to play it cool.

“Well, here I am. I don’t really want to do the boring stuff alone, you down to team up?”

���Let’s do it,” you said, grinning.

You both went off starting with the basics—mining, gathering resources, and exploring the terrain. Time seemed to fly by as you bantered back and forth, and your chat was loving the dynamic.

“So, I’m thinking we need to build something epic. How about a house-building contest?” you suggested after a while.

“Oh, it’s like that, huh? Alright, Y/N, you’re on. But don’t cry when I win,” Spencer joked.

“Yeah, yeah, we’ll see,” you shot back, laughing.

The competition was fun and lighthearted, with both of you trying to one-up each other while the chat egged you on. In the end, it was too close to call.

“Alright, I’ll admit it,” Spencer said, surveying both builds. “This is a draw. They’re both sick.”

“I’ll take it,” you said, smiling. “Good game, Spencer.”

As weeks passed, you and Spencer found yourselves teaming up more and more, both on and off stream. Your viewers started to notice too, spamming your chat with ship names and yours feeds with fan art. You two clicked, and it made for some really fun content.

One weekend, after a particularly successful stream, Spencer shot you a message: “Hey, after the stream, you wanna do something chill? Maybe watch a movie together?"

You blinked at the screen, feeling a flutter of excitement. “Like a virtual date? I’m in. What are we watching?"

“How about 'The Princess Bride'? Total classic."

"I’m so down. Let’s do it."

After the stream, you both synced up on a streaming service and hit play. As the movie went on, you kept up with your usual banter and jokes, making each other laugh. It felt natural, almost like you were in the same room.

“I can’t believe you’ve never seen this before,” Spencer teased as the credits rolled.

“I know, I know, I’m late to the party. But thanks for inviting me to watch it with you,” you replied, feeling warm and fuzzy inside.

“Anytime. This was fun. We should do it again,” he said, and you could hear the smile in his voice.

From then on, these virtual hangouts became a regular thing. Whether it was watching movies, playing other games, or just chatting while you both cooked dinner over video call, it became something you both looked forward to.

One night, after you’d finished a particularly epic stream where you and Spencer had defeated the Ender Dragon, you found yourselves lingering in the game, just chatting while your avatars stood idly by a pixelated sunset.

“Hey, Y/N,” Spencer said, his voice softer, more serious than usual.

“Yeah?” you asked, wondering what was on his mind.

“I’ve been thinking a lot lately. These past few weeks have been awesome. Like, seriously awesome. I’ve really enjoyed getting to know you better,” he admitted.

You felt a flutter in your chest. “I’ve been feeling the same way, Spencer. It’s been so much fun hanging out with you.”

He paused for a moment, and you could almost feel him gathering his thoughts. “I think… I’ve caught feelings for you. I know we’re miles apart, but I wanted to be honest about it.”

You were quiet for a moment, letting his words sink in before a smile broke out across your face. “Spencer, I feel the same way. I don’t know how we’re going to make it work with the distance, but I’m in if you are.”

The relief in his voice was palpable. “I’m definitely in. We’ll figure it out, whatever that means.”

[freakinator]

funny thing about how i view the conflict in todays stream is that i view flame and wemmbu in very separate ways despite them doing essentially the same thing

in flames case:

i view his betrayal as ultimately a tragedy, their history all thrown aside due to a combination of wounded pride and genuine upset

if yall didnt see his chat for this stream it was actually really, really bad, like his chat is genuinely so fucking annoying oh my god and is a really good demonstration of why i think streamers should be mean to their chatters sometimes to so i actually wasnt at all surprised that he was so upset but i thought hed log off instead of acting out like this

he wanted respect but literally ruined the months long work of one of the few ppl that were willing to trust him over something that couldve been resolved if he just waited until september, but at the same time i can kinda understand why he was being so impulsive considering again his chat is Really bad, but at the end of the day that really shouldnt have been something you took out on one of your few allies like???? bruh even mocked zams storytelling as if he didnt do thee same shit as well 😭

honestly one of the reasons i was sad about his betrayal is cause it kinda sounded to me like he was genuinely about to cry at first??? maybe im just making shit up tho and he def stopped sounding like he was gonna cry after blowing up the spacewaffles tower lol

in wemmbus case:

i feel no pity for this man, he wanted conflict wherever he can get it and he got it! i think hes a lot like zam in that he just wants some attention and most importantly something to do but whatever happens to him next is his own fault lmao, i respect his honesty tho like hey he sucks but he knows what hes about at least lol

the fact that he still kept trying to get a commission from zam (or at least guilttripping him about it for lack of a better word) like bro i know you wanted to do a capitalism morality dilemma arc with zam but read the room my guy 😭

maybe hes at least a little mad that zam kept turning him away despite the fact he accepted a commission from mapicc of all ppl but like. bro. theres a reason zam called him a nightmare customer lmao

that being said you can tell hes not used to going this overboard considering he offered to help repair the tree when zam got upset lmao

idk i just thought his evilness was kinda funny, still hope he gets his shit kicked in spectacularly tho!

its funny, despite being acting like the shitty no reading comprehension version of abyss he gives me the exact same feeling of schadenfreude i did for minute back in s5 and i believe part of it is his mockery of lore and weird complicated dismissal of moral conflict particularly regarding zam

by weird complicated dismissal of moral conflict i mean both he and minute both tried to convince zam to see ''their side'' and ''reason'' but coming at it from an angle that completely misunderstands zam and when zam points it out they dismiss it and act like it means nothing because of their ''objective'' view of reality, spoiler alert! its not objective at all and they refuse to understand things from zams perspective cause they think hes just being unreasonable or something

idk overall i think their motivations for doing things are just kinda... shit lol

like ik theres some pretty obvious parallels that can be made with s5 here but the difference between the og players and flamebu aside from the lack of style and drama is that the og players waited several months before they started acting out the way they did and when they did start acting out tgey always made sure evryone who wanted to get involved Actually got involved rather than doing it while everyone was away plus their opps werent their own allies (except maybe pangi depending on how you look at it)

[kiirschtein-archive]

⋆ 「 𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐨𝐩𝐞𝐧 𝐫𝐨𝐚𝐝. 」 ⋆

toji's tired and doesn't feel like hearing you run your mouth in the passenger's seat of his car. so you find other ways to occupy yourself.

pairing. — toji fushiguro x f!reader

word count. — 893

content. — nsfw (18+ only), established relationship, daddy kink, toji's a lil mean (duh), pet names (baby, babygirl, little girl), finger sucking, masturbation (f), brief mention of penetrative sex.

notes. — i have toji brainrot so bad rn y'all it's not even funny. so i had to write this while working tonight LMAO i just needed to get it out of my brain. hope you enjoy <3

It’s late, and the back roads are lit up only by the headlights as the two of you skirt around curves in his expensive car. You’d bet money that you’re going well over the designated speed limit, because Toji, despite being exhausted from a long day, is still fulfilling his habit of being on the brink of reckless driving. The air is cool where he has the driver’s side window down to let the smoke from his cigarette stream out, and he’s silent as you seemingly burst with energy next to him.

You’ve been rambling on for a few minutes now about something you’ve been particularly excited about as of late, chatting your tired boyfriend’s ear off without realizing it. The low hum of the radio hardly even gets to make itself known beneath your continuous jubilant speech.

“And I can’t believe that—”

“Baby,” Toji’s voice is raised just the slightest bit to overpower yours, cutting you off before you can go on. You watch as he inhales and exhales his final breath of smoke, flicking the cigarette butt outside and rolling up the window. “Can you do daddy a favor and shut your fuckin’ mouth for a minute?”

You can finally hear the radio now that silence sweeps over you and you’re able to absorb the nonchalant harshness of his words. It doesn’t affect you too badly, however. He’s always like this. 

But narrowing your eyes into a half-hearted glare, you declare coldly in his direction, “You’re mean.”

The both of you know that you aren’t exactly heartbroken, nor are you entirely serious with your angry pout and juvenile words, so Toji speaks just as apathetically as before, “Yeah, well cry me a river over it, little girl.” He reaches a calloused hand over to roughly squeeze at your knee. It hurts a little, and there’s no smile from him nor a laugh, but you’re fully aware that it’s his way of being somewhat sadistically playful, attempting to dismantle any potential hard feelings.

Toji loosens his grip but leaves his hand there, letting you feel its warmth against your chilled skin. His fingers are so large and picturesque in a rugged sort of way, thumb stroking absentmindedly as his gaze continues to pierce ahead at the road. It’s so quiet that you suddenly feel the urge to be a little impish; maybe there are other things you can do with your mouth besides talk.

Taking him by the wrist and forearm, you guide his hand up to slide two big fingers between your lips, soaking them in the saliva that freshly pools in your mouth. He tastes like salt and nicotine, all too familiar against the flat of your tongue, and it prompts you to start a gentle suck. Toji smirks and huffs at the feeling of your hot mouth around him, muscles flexing but resisting the impulse to fuck his fingers forward until the tips hit the back of your throat. Instead, he lets you occupy yourself with your ability to take full control.

This new sense of quiet is oddly like music to his ears, only interrupted by the occasional suckling noise and the tiny hums you make in between them. “That’s a good girl,” he drawls and praises with a wicked smile on his face, pressing his fingers down against your tongue for only a moment and stealing a glance over at you as he does so. Then he starts to laugh. "Shit, I shoulda had you doin' this ten minutes ago. Shuts you up nice and good, doesn't it?"

You remove his hand long enough to take a breath and reply, perhaps with a hint of defiance, “Yes, daddy.” It makes his cock twitch when you say it like that.

Toji chuckles again. "That was a rhetorical question, babygirl, but I like where your mind’s at." He never intended for you to stop sucking or being quiet, but he’s too delighted to be bothered by it in the least.

After another minute of working until your tongue is almost sore, the heat between your thighs has increased to an intolerable amount, leaving you yearning for more than just the solution to an oral fixation. You weasel a hand down to work through fabric until a fingertip can gather some slick and swirl it around your clit, causing your cunt to clench and throat to moan around Toji’s fingertips. His head turns to look as you do so, jaw slack, and the car swerves a bit after he loses his focus on driving.

“Fuck, baby, you’re gonna run me off the road.” He grits his teeth and pulls his fingers from your mouth, gently gripping you by the jaw as he takes a moment to correct the steering wheel. Once on another straight path, Toji looks back over at you stroking your clit and presses his thumb past your lips and onto your tongue. You look at him with furrowed brows and moan, drool now spilling down your chin. 

“Screw this,” he mutters, deciding he’s finally had enough. Within a second he’s pulling the car off the side of the road without warning, throwing it into park and undoing your seat belt with haste.

It doesn’t take long for him to have you sitting nice and pretty on his cock, and he’s not complaining about the noise this time.

[anxiouspotionofgloom]

Day 7 - As The Wheel Turns - Summer Rain

[Hi! I like this one! Started as Scarian highschool sweethearts running away, and ended up as this whole angel and Schrodinger's apocalypse thing lmao. @hot-scarian-summer-2024 (thank you admins for your work btw) Wishing everyone a very nice day/night/whatever <3]

-

The day July ends, the sky starts to cry. 

Grian feels the drops of water hit the edge of his shoes - it hits the socks too, and he hates the feeling of wet fabric, but there's something too fascinating about the way the droplets slide off the smooth plastic.

Somehow, in all their planning, they hadn't accounted for the weather. The crystal-clear feeling in his guts intensifies until anxiety is all he can breathe. In and out. None of it helps in the suffocating heat. 

It's gonna make the travel difficult. The first thought comes, unbidden, following the unsteady stream of worries clouding up his head. 

If he ever comes at all. A second, bitter part of him answers. When you live in a town like this, there's a part of you that rots, right here against the white-painted fences and even whiter smiles. When you live in a town like this one, you don't live at all.

But Scar had swore on his life he'd be there, million-dollar smile tucked away in favor of a lopsided grin, and Grian had chosen to believe him - the other had this kind of effect, like a light.

So now Grian's here, wet socks and a grimace, waiting for either the executioner or the heart.

His chest stands still even as the rain parts to welcome a beat-up car into the land of the living, spat out of the dreamlike state all things tended to look like under the unyielding curtains of lukewarm tears.

It's only when a familiar face steps out of the engine that the moment breaks and his lungs suddenly cave in. "Scar." It's punched out, drowned under the concerto of raindrops, but he hears him all the same, tipping his hat in greetings.

He is- well, completely drenched. His hair droops clumsily on his forehead, and he looks like the human version of that sad cat you see hiding under a cardboard box during a storm. It's a lovely sight, if a bit funny.

"Hello there! Looking for a ride?" Scar grins, and the anxiety attacking his guts doesn't lift per se, but it does lighten, the heavy burden of what he's about to do hissing like a cornered animal in the face of Scar's self-assured smile.

It doesn't mean Grian will let this go to his big head. He rolls his eyes. "You look like you fought a pool. And lost. Quite terribly."

Closing the distance between them in three long strides to shelter himself from the rain that doesn't stop, Scar pouts. "Hey, it's not my fault I couldn't check the weather because your town-"

"Not my town anymore." He cuts, with a venom that almost surprises him. Deep down, if you'd look into his soul, you could probably see it - a hairline fracture that keeps getting bigger and bigger, the burning bridge in between the Grian that was and the Grian that is now.

Scar looks taken aback, mouth still open on eaten words, but it's quickly replaced by a satisfied smile.

It's too much. Too telling. Grian averts his eyes and changes the conversation to a subject that is less brittle. "We should get going." A quick look back at the house. "I made them sleep, but I don't how long."

Following his gaze into the curtained windows hiding what Grian has done, Scar bows, with the sort of flourish that meant he'd practiced it in front of a mirror. "After you, angel." It's endearing, and Grian allows himself a little smile before hastily walking towards the car, succumbing to the childish thinking that if he'd move quick enough, the rain would not be able to get him.

Scar follows suit, nearly slipping on the wet stairs, and Grian watches him run through the rear window with something like laughter in his throat.

Once inside, the door slamming with a resounding clack, Scar looks at him, truly looks at him and says, with his whole chest. "You're sure about it?"

There's the split second of panic, that dumb little part of him that still doubts - the record screeches and sputters some off-beat noises: ARE YOU SURE? But it only takes one look into Scar's open eyes to set his mind back on the right track. 

"Certain." The silence continues, and the car very obviously doesn’t start.

"One hundred percent, absolutely-never-regretting-it sure?"

The insistence makes his teeth clench. "Drive the car, Scar, or I'm throwing you out to do it myself."

He laughs as if he was just making some kind of joke, the comic de repetition, but Grian can see the way his fingers relax around the steering wheel. "Good try. I know you don't have a driving license. You still need good old Scar around!" 

It hits true. Truer than he'd like to admit. At least, there's some level of detachment from it, born from the notion of necessity- I need you to drive me around, I need you to teach me how to be human, I need. But then, Grian can already feel the four-letter word assigned to Scar shift, becoming something less like need and something more like want.

I want you around, he thinks, eyes running away from the danger, so much that it hurts.

As the town's buildings start to blur away into a faraway shape, Scar's right hand leaves the wheel so it can squeeze Grian's own. It's warm and solid against the pale of his skin, and most importantly it feels real.

Maybe the wanting can go both ways.

-

He'd thought he'd feel them leaving the town, like an elastic band that stretches too far, but in the end, it is very anticlimactic. They drive that long stretched road, and there's a sign that says goodbye flashing through the windows and that's it.

The asphalt feels endless. They must have noticed now - no one answering the door, the upstairs room with barred windows empty. Maybe if Grian listens closely he can hear those sharp bell noises, warning everyone that the bird has flown away from its cage.

It's too late now. He already feels himself becoming whole again, piece by piece. 

Outside, thunder rumbles.

"It's gonna be the end of the world, isn't it?"

Scar, knuckles tight against the faux leather, doesn't stray his eyes from the road. "I honestly don't know. We've been hanging pretty well around here. But Grian, the people in your town... They can rot."

The memories of Sunday mass and broken bones filter through the cracks in his guard. Looking at Scar, he cannot bring himself to regret any of this. The first human emotion he had been taught was fear, and the second hatred. They both understand the weight of his silence. "They will."

Scar doesn't ask about the assurance steeling his words. He doesn't need to.

Some people believe in fate. Grian, for himself, mostly believes in coincidences. There's a string of hazards and dice rolls that leads you straight into the path you walk, and no amount of cosmic energy can explain all those tidbits of stuff slipping through the cracks. 

In the end, Scar had been a thief looking for something precious, and Grian had been something precious looking for a thief.

He'd been a little bit of a Goldberg machine that way, sinking his claws into the concept of freedom while abiding by a lot of their stupid rules. Scar had been the hammer to his glass case, and it's a debt he doesn't know how to repay.

The town had always worked to prevent an angel from escaping, but they had forgotten to ward against the glaringly obvious: Grian had simply done it the human way, and walked out the door.

Life loved to string up all those little coincidences, and meeting Scar had been Grian's big win against the casino machine of Fate.

-

At their first stop at a gas station, Grian halts him - gripping the flesh of his arm maybe a bit too tight - and kisses him, eyes closed teeth smashed against each other, the whole shebang. 

Scar startles, the hand still on the door handle going lax, and Grian can see the surprise in his big round eyes. "I want you. Is that-" He stumbles, unsure of which path to tread. "Is that alright?" 

There's a bit of silence that rings way too loud in his head, and he's sure he's fucked up everything before Scar blinks back to life with a smile so bright it burns. His voice is soft. "Of course." 

Slowly, Scar lifts his hand up until it meets his lips, gentle. "Look at me," He boasts, already insufferable. "Told you I was an amazing thief, I even stole your heart."

It's so corny it gets a giggle out of him, and Scar looks so proud Grian has to shove that stupid man's hat against his eyes so that he doesn’t see him blush.

It's embarrassing, really. But it's not a bad way to go into the end of the world.

[ianthoni]

Listen, Anthony's IG stories be about unconditional love and whatnot. I don't give a flying rats ass, they're about Ian 😎

LISTEN whenever i share my thoughts ppl call me crazy. But hear me out. I'm running an update account (@ian-anthonyupdates ) and im following his stories since december. And i believe all his stories about destiny/finding the true love/unconditional love/universe/sun-moon coded, fire and water coded stories are about Ian. And i have a ten pics limit so im gonna show a little bit whats in my head. (Check spirituality/lover boy tags in my updates profile you're gonna see what i mean i think half of them are related to Ian if not most) (the unconditional love videos he share is gonna be last)

Starting from his art pieces and their connection to Ian. This post was shared on the night of eclipse. For you guys to fully understand this whole interaction i need to start from the beginning of the day. Ian shared he watched the eclipse that day. He sharing a meme and a shadow of the eclipse (I'm gonna explain more in the next part) and then Anthony shared the red painting you can see at the back. Around the same time. That was Ian's FIRST ever comment in Anthony's painting account. He also followed Anthony's painting page and said 'this one was my favorite one so far'. And that night Anthony shared this heart, with the painting Ian liked at the back. Heart with an eye in it. Now eye is a keyword for us remember that it's gonna come up later in this essay lmao also noticed the tray in the table? Yeah it is coming in now.

Now here is the part tray comes in. That first tray is Anthony's tray. We can see it on the story he shared from the same day. And the eclipse story is Ian's story, he was watching the eclipse. Did you notice something? It is Anthony's tray, theyre watching the eclipse together. Now you may say that tray didnt come out in the factory as one piece. But remember it is from the same day. And its up to you if you believe it or not im just giving my observation. And remember this is the same day he liked Anthony's painting and followed his account. It is very very possible that they were together and maybe he even watched Anthony while he is painting.

After that watching the eclipse story. Anthony made an eclipse painting. Very obviously the sun hugging the moon. I love sun and moon ianthony stories because Anthony himself said Ian is like the sun. And we all know the romantic meaning of moon and sun, how sun illuminates the moon, how moon is in love with the sun and always around it. So it fits them. And Anthony shared this painting a few times after he did it which he was not doing that at the time. Like he wanted someone to see it and like it, comment on it like he did before with the red painting. But it didnt happen sadly :/ (this also might be the reason of instagram drama but im not opening that can of worms)

Now the EYES. Anthony and his obsession with blue eyes. This is definitely coming from looong before (i.e all his past gfs being blue eyed) but you know who's the first blue eye he met? Yeah you guessed it right. Ian. It doesnt even have to be love, but i think ian's eyes was always a safe place to him, something warm and remind him home and makes him feel happy cause Ian makes him happy. And he always complimented ian's eyes, how theyre beautiful and whenever Ian wears blue he always mention it, he even said "your eyes are out of this word" in Jared Leto live stream. So he loves blue eyes of a special person. And if you noticed before he loves drawing them too, either just blue pupils or full blue eyes but there's a couple of them. I'm specifically sharing this one cause he put a secret message in this. "I see the universe in your eyes" he shared lots of stuff about universe and destiny and love. And talked about him and Ian meeting again was universes job/ destiny. So i think he is associating Ian with the destiny/universe/galaxies stuff. NOW whats MORE interesting is Ian shared that story 7 hours after Anthony shared his painting... Interesting right. Oh btw Anthony always share his painting steps but he didnt share the i see the universe in your eyes. Like its a secret message just for one person to get it. And that person get it and send his own message back.

To accompany the eclipse painting, he used two songs, one that talked about a "longing" and another that was called Bliss and was the same piece that was playing in another story he shared that was about "consciousness observing the feeling of falling in love". (Which makes the romantic connotation of the eclipse painting undeniable). To make it even more interesting the same day he posted that eclipse painting he posted a picture of himself in lan's office, under a tapestry depicting a sun.

Ok this is getting SO LONG. But stay with me. The first one the hug. I shared that the hug looks exactly like their hugs. This is not obviously just that. The caption is more important. "Our differences makes us complete. Anthony talked about Ian and him being opposites in multiple videos till now. They're like water and fire, sun and moon, yin and yang. But this doesnt change the fact that they always find each other. If anything they're so happy with it now. They're getting along more than before.

Well do i have to say anything? Friendship always wins.

Again water and fire hugging allegory. I love that he's thinking of each other like that. He also make comments about Ian bringing the fire, also the fact that he's sun literally fire ball. Ian's favorite movie rrr had water/sun allegory. So it is obv to me he thinks of them when it's about opposites falling. Oh and he also have a "in order to live life we need fire" tattoo.

This one is so funny cause i didnt get it until they talk in the live stream. He talked about how he saw Ian going for a walk and he said can I join you too? And ofc Ian said yes and they went for a walk around together. He literally shared this the day Ian and him go for a walk together 😭 he said life is pretty good actually after spending time with Ian is so🥺

This was also from the same day he went on a walk with Ian. I think it fits. Watch hot tub live stream for the full walk story.

This was the day after they spend time together, going for a walk, shooting day. He missed someone.

Tbh this is pretty self explanatory too. He did see Ian as coming home, a safe place, like turning back home after a Kong tiring day, just like he did with meeting with Ian again and glowing with him each passing day.

Well Ian is pretty LMAO and i don't see he's posting this about someone new. Like idk 🤷🏻

Again the unconditional love theme. He share a lot of stuff about this actually. I think it fits them. He loves Ian without a reason.

People think the first one is about someone new. Cause of the way it says "and then one day someone walks into your life" like someone walks into his life just now. But i see this as him remembering their first meet. How Ian walked into his life that very day in 6th grade and how he changed his life completely. Anthony is so talented don't get me wrong but if they're smosh now, if he is Anthony Padilla™ now its because of Ian. Ian was with him from the very beginning. He was helping him, encouraging him, supporting him when he was a shy lil teen in front of the camera. I think Ian is the one that walking in his life and completely changing it in the best way possible.

Unconditional love, a theme he is posting about very occasionly. Since we're that deep and ppl already call me delulu im just gonna write what i write to friends when i see his unconditional love stories.

Unconditional love means he would love him without expecting anything in return. This doesn't mean there's no love returning back to him but means he would love him even if there wasn't. Even if Ian didn't hug him enough or kiss him enough or share him with the world the way he wants it. He'd still love him. Cause his love is unconditional. He doesn't need any of this. He still loves him without getting to shout out to the world.

He is meaning he would love him for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish. This is basically a wedding wow. It doesnt mean he thinks Ian wont make him laugh or he is not beautiful or hes poor, no he means even if he had nothing he'd still love him. Hence the unconditional. They loved each other when they were little boy's that have nothing and look like little gremlins. And i think its not gonna go away soon.

Oh also did you notice something? The very beginning of the video. Is basically the same as the ornament in Ian's room. With a bright and rising sun in it : )

Ok bye love y'all 💖

[hannahlovesluca]

Hi!!Can i ask for LUXIEM(or just ike) hcs with an s/o who's just insanely good at suika or puyo puyo even though they just played the game once or twice?:D

i had to write this ASAP i love writing ab reader playing games LMAOO

Luxiem + S/O who’s good at Suika

• he’s mediocre at suika, so normally he wouldnt join any tostus while the other is playing (i hardly see him join totsus in general so-)

• however if its YOU whos hosting any kind of tostu or just anything, HES JOINING INBA HEARTBEAT

• yk how he is with ike? all simp-y and always looking for a way to spend time with him? yeah he does that to you too

• anyway, when he sees you get 3000+ points your FIRST TIME PLAYING

• his face: 😧

• he probably doesn’t believe that its your first time LMAOO - you probably have to prove it to him off stream somehow

• if you’re his kouhai: “y/n, i’m your elder you can’t be embarrassing me like this…”

• if you’re his senpai: “…you know what they say; the elder, the wiser.”

• “oh god, please don’t bounce up…” “PLEASE BOUNCE UP FOR THE LOVE OF GOD” - guess which one is vox

• anyway, afterwards, he’ll probably force you to watch him play fnaf afterwards so he has sone sort of pride in being able to out-do you somehow

• the mf sings to try and distract you to get you to mess up

• change. my. mind.

• “country rooooaaaaadssss, take me hooooooooome, to the plaaaaaceeee i BEEEELOOOOOOONGGGGG”

• getting 3000 first time hes just like ?????

• probably has that one face with the wide eyes and mouth wide open (like that one clip of sonny during the game show off collab w/ noctyx)

• and if you’re like him and start spewing nonsense to focus better, he’ll be laughing so hard

• “hey, chat, do you think anal hurts that bad?”

• “what???”

• if you have his fugi on your head whilst streaming he’ll probably pretend to punch it now and then just to get a reaction out of you

• mf is okay at suika but not like terribly amazing

• that being said hes rooting for you and will probably be so amazed at you repeatedly getting over 3000

• if there ever is a point where you’re malding he’ll either - A: Mald with you - B: Laugh his fucking ass off

• “WHY THE FUCK DID IT BOUNCE UP TO THE TOP?!?!”

• “LMAO AHAHAHAHAHABSISHWHAHA”

• definitely literally says “lmao” if you fail

• will bring up the most random things to talk about!!!

• “y/n have you seen that food theory video where he tried to cook his steak in the dryer??”

• “luca wtf are you talking about?”

• if you recently had an off collab he’ll also be telling embarrassing stories about you

• “[insert fan name] did you guys know that Y/N eats their oatmeal dry?? like no water.”

• anyways all around, hes amazed and he probably sends you a sweet discord message after stream

• “you’re so good at suika!!! :D”

• FOLLOW UP MESSAGE: “ew that was cringe ignore that”

• he just sucks at suika so hes just like: :0

• “y/n??? this isn’t like…pre-recorded?”

• “DO YOU NOT TRUST ME, IKE??”

• im running out of ideas for them uhhh

• when you get over 3000 your first try hes genuinely so amazed

• say he has a zatsu the next day, if someone superchats him about the totsu the night before he’ll go on a rant about how jealous he is that you’re so good at Suika

• “yeah, Y/N is like Shu and Mari with Tetris, they need to teach me their ways.”

• “an akasupa! ‘honest opinions on Y/N?’ Good question!”

• and then never elaborates

• uhhhhhh

• will most likely start bringing up either super philosophical topics to talk about or it’ll end up just being about miku

• LMAO IMAGINE YOU START TRASH TALKING IKE BEFORE HE JOINS THE TOTSU AND HE JOINS OUT OF PETTINESS???

• “yeah- so ike sucks at this game HAHAH-“ *ike joins* “SAY IT TO MY FACE”

• as soon as you sent the message you were doing a totsu he reacted to the message with that pepe side eye emote they have in the NIJI discord

• probably doesn’t join first, he waits for others

• LMAOO IF ITS HIM AND CLAUDE ITS GONNA BE CHAOTIC ASF

• claude: “y/n how do you feel about patriotism?” shu: “frick the patriarchy” y/n: “????”

• but, if the other leaves and its just you two, since hes pretty good at the game as well, he’ll probably help you with where to drop it

• and again, like luca, will probably bring up random topics

• and ligma jokes

• lots and lots of ligma jokes

• will also send messages in the discord server like:

• Shu Yamino: “y/n is too good someone plz trash talk them”

• Shu Yamino: “oh frick y/n’s good”

• LMAO PROBABLY TWEETS TOO

• Shu Yamino 👟☯️: y’all cant compare what the flip is this

notice how luca and ike’s are the longest

[pythonees]

✦┊ LIGHTLESS EYES — johnny slaughter

REQUESTED: “hiiii :D i was wondering if you could do a dom!Johnny x sub! reader where Johnny went to rough and the reader went into a subdrop/subspace because of it??” ~ anon

WARNINGS: 18+, subdrop, choking, rough sex, temporarily mute reader, tcm things, johnny being himself, my writing

A/N: never written (or read) anything like this before so I have no idea if it's any good or not. Kinda based it off my down episodes (aka I forgot to take my meds) and have a severe drop in my mood. Send me a favourite fic of urs that has subdrop in it (preferably with someone I've written for so I enjoy reading it lmao) so I can learn a bit more plzzzzz!

I truly believe that this would only happen if he's serious about you in a wife you up and continue the Slaughter legacy sort of way. Anything less than that and he would be so annoyed by you that he'd simply kill you and move on with his life…

The first time it happens, Johnny barely even notices that anything is wrong. At first.

You're used to him being rough with you, it's his default, the sweet and gentle only used when he's trying to apologize without having to say the words. Or the odd time he's in a good mood, or you've done something to impress him.

Today was a bad day for Johnny, to say the least. They had lured in a new group of people a few days ago, and some of them had managed to escape their restraints. None of them were able to get off the property, thank god, but it was a near thing.

Johnny had come back to his shack pissed off, a few stab wounds that will no doubt turn into scars to join the others that littered his body. He didn't bother dressing them when he had stormed in, dragging you away from cleaning the bathroom and forcing you face down onto the bed.

The brutal pace had you gasping for air around the tight grip he had on your throat, using your body to blow off the steam that killing didn't. Still, nothing new. But it was the way his hand had gripped around your neck, too tight to be pleasurable, vision swimming from the lack of oxygen, that had tears streaming down your face in pain and fear.

His other hand rubs fast and hard at your clit, for his own pleasure of feeling your walls clamp down around him then for you at the moment, and only then does he release his hold on your neck, bracing himself with both hands as he chases his high.

Through the high of your orgasm you're able to breathe again, but it doesn't feel like you're really taking in any air. Your heart feels like a vice in your chest, and despite the wetness of tears soaking the pillow your face is squished into, you make no sound.

Johnny goes about cleaning himself and then you as he usually does, the water bitterly cold but soothing against your abused cunt. You barely make a sound, not even pulling away. You just lay there, breathing choppy and mind blurringly empty.

Johnny chucks the washcloth into the hamper you had made him get (he stole it from someone's house) in an attempt to make the place seem more homely. When he lays beside you, a cold beer already in his hand, he realizes something isn't quite right.

Normally, you're all over him after sex, wrapped around him sleepy and blissed out while he complains about whatever it is that's pissed him off that day. Or the rare time he's gotten himself a good haul from whatever poor suckers get led into the Slaughters trap. Now, you're not even moving.

For a second he thinks you're dead, that's how still you are. But he can see the barely there movement of your back raising and falling with your breaths, and the sudden shock of fear that gripped him vanishes. Then he thinks you've just fallen asleep like that, so he moves the blanket out from under you so that you don't get up in the middle of the night and bitch about how cold you are.

That's when he sees your face, and he freezes. The second you're moved onto your side you start to curl in on yourself, eyes vacant as your breathing continues to come in shaky, short puffs. You don't even acknowledge him as he turns you on your back.

“The hells wrong with you, woman?” Johnnys voice is gruff as he forces your face towards his own, lips pulled back into a snarl as your glassy eyes seem to stare right through him. Your damp face isn't really new, the way he can fuck you into a stupor, but the way you don't respond to him as he jostles you around is.

Your head lolls to the side, and the dim light catches the already forming bruise around your throat. It's concerningly dark in such a short amount of time, the scratchiness in your breathing telling to just how rough he really was with you.

Despite his aggressiveness he's very much aware of how much you can take, always toeing the line off too much to watch you squirm. It's how he likes you best, struggling against his rough treatment despite enjoying it. The fight has his blood pumping and mouth watering.

Johnnys skin feels cold and prickly as he tries to get you to respond, to move or do anything, but you just lay there like a corpse. Panic starts to set in after a few pinches to the more tender areas of your body don't even cause you to flinch. He's pushing up to get out of bed to find Nancy or Sissy or even fuck Dryton to help him, but your hand shoots out to grab onto his arm before he can get one foot off the mattress.

“... Darlin’?” His voice is a bit shaky, and normally he'd be disgusted with himself for showing such emotions, but he's so out of his element he doesn't even notice it.

You aren't able to form any words, tugging on his arm until he comes back into the bed. He's completely lost, staring down at you for any sign at all. You don't do anything besides close your eyes, settling more into your pillow. Your uneven breathing is the only way he knows that you didn't just fall asleep or pass out, but the rest of you is still.

The first touch of his hand on top of your head has the fuzzy tv noise in your brain fading, an absent noise of happiness coming from the back of your throat that's barely even audible. His fingers twitch, accidentally smoothing over your hair and causing you to relax further.

Still lost as to what's actually wrong he lets his hand over your hair, watching as you very slowly but surely start to come back to yourself. When you move to wrap yourself around him like normal, he falls back into the old routine of talking about his day, though he keeps an eye on you to make sure you don't slip back into wherever it was you were moments ago.

After that it's pretty rare for you to fall into another sub drop like that. He's not stupid so he knows he pushes you too far even though he had no idea what was going on after. Any time you do he's also able to soothe you better. He's not very communicative so he probably won't ask you how to help you, so unless you tell him he'll just hold you until you don't look so vacant.

©︎ pythonees — do not, under any circumstance, repost, plagiarize, modify or translate my work.

[awakened-omen-art]

The finished piece! I had plans to shade it but i couldn't get it to look right lmao

maybe i'll come back to visit this and shade it properly, maybe i won't who knows!!

Anyways- Stream Mesmerizer cause i literally had it on repeat for several hours while working on this

Time to go rest my wrist for a couple days before i go finish a couple pieces i dropped to work on this :3

(also before anyone says anything yes i know Miku is supposed to be in roller skates but i didn't notice until i started lining and i was too lazy to change it lol)

EDIT: I CANNOT BELIEVE I FORGOT THE STRIPES ON TETO'S SHIRT

[stormblessed95]

230328 JK Live Stream all about Jimin for 100 minutes

The way that he basically started this live solely to talk about/focus on Jimin? Like sir, what were we even here for? Just to watch you support your boo? I'm actually totally fine with that. Lmao he talked about himself and his CK deal for like 10 minutes before moving on to Jimin and Jimin only. Lol he said "I Miss Jimin" literally, on weverse and then proceeded to show us just how much he missed him!

The way he fully stated he started this live because he hasn't seen Suchwita yet but since Jimin was on the show, he wanted to watch it and wanted to watch it with us. Cutie. You can watch his full reaction video with eng subs here:

He immediately wanted to know why Jimin wasn't there right off the bat 🤣 then was looking forward to what Alcohol Jimin brought with him to share. And was not surprised at all to find it was Soju saying that's "very much like Jimin hyung." The drinking buddies those 2 are, he WOULD know. Lol and his little complaints about wishing he was there drinking with yoonmin too were adorable.

The way he was concerned over Jimin eating the too hot food. And the way he giggled over yoonmin talking about Jimin performing on stage with Yoongi on tour and about Jimin acting cute for his face time fan calls.

And the confirmation from yet another member that the dumpling incident was watered way down for fan consumption when they shared about it and it really was so crazy. Lmfao vmin what did yall do!!

Plus we were blessed with a small glimpse of his beautiful smile and reaction to the iconic jikook black swan lift 🥺😭😍

The way he immediately agreed with Jimin about being in BTS for a long long time. 🥺 and his cute comments about how the show seems fun and he would also like to be on it one day! And the way he started to compliment Jimin on the way he expressed himself but cut himself off/got distracted lol

He reacted to SMF pt 2 MV here too. Lol and loved it. Throughly. Lol full video here:

He wanted to confirm the lyrics correctly especially for the maze lyrics. He was humming along and also lowkey already knew the choreo too. It was so cute. I love him.

And the way he smiled so proudly during the "I won't stop even if they mock me" lyrics 🥺

How we got the transition into shirtless Jimin and verse 2 and we just breifly totally lost JK there. 404 error not found is correct. Slack jawed for a bit there understandably lol

The way he heaped praise upon verse 2 which was so heartwarming

And he watched the dance practice for SMFpt2 too, which you can see the whole reaction here

The way he was humming along and then dancing along lmfao he didn't have to go so hard with the Summoning park jimin dance 🤣

And we even reacted to a BTS teasing Jimin compilation video??? Lmao jungkook??

PLEASE just watch the linked video. Lmfao it's less than 10 minutes and he looks SO SMITTEN the ENTIRE TIME. The reaction to their jikook moments from so long ago? The giggles at the other members lovingly teasing Jimin too? The way he melted watching Jimin sing promise too? MY HEART CANT HANDLE IT I CANT BELIEVE HE REACTED TO A JIMIN COMPILATION HONESTLY

Just the whole live he looks soooo??? In love?

And he commented about how he watched Jimins pixid video too and enjoyed it. Lol it really was just a night of binge watching Jimin for this man.

He is really just out here supporting Jimin fully and he misses him so much. We know they've been spending time together too. They mentioned JK being at some of Jimins Rehersals. We know they met with up with the other members for an OT7 dinner. I just know there is more we don't know too. But it just speaks to how much time they normally spend together when that's clearly not enough and the way they are missing each other SO MUCH even with those other times spent together. They are used to living in each other's pockets clearly lol. And now that they have so much going on and Jimins schedules are so crazy, that time apart is driving JK to do a 100 minute live stream about how much he misses his hyung. Lol Jimin you better go over their for that promised dinner he wants to cook for you!

Not to mention, JK really brought it back to prove his point. Jimin is his catalyst. His inspiration at so many times. JK really sat there and watched Jimin for 100 minutes and then immediately said goodbye to us because he was struck with inspiration and motivation to go work. "I suddenly feel like I have to go do something." "I think I have to go work." "I'm going to go work now! Bye!" With an abrupt hang up! Lol it was giving, I don't want to say more than i should about Jimin right now and wow, the inspiration struck and I REALLY am interested in seeing whatever it is you worked on Jungkook! Music? Art? New song? If Jimin inspired you so much, I'm very intrigued! 🤣

They really are so precious. So cute. And so sweet. I hope they got to go over and spend some lengthy time together already, or if not. I hope they get the chance really soon. As they are both very clearly craving that time together!

Ending with this funny tweet (follow the link!) Because it's so true 🤣🤣🤣

[goldstargloww]

quick note before i start ranting: last night i started thinking. and then i started ranting in discord. and it got off track. and then i woke up this morning and had a similar thought. so this is just a stream of thoughts from me, really, lmao also, absolutely all of this is from memory, there's a good chance i got some stuff wrong (and i also include a lot of headcanons based off estimates and stuff i don't think would be a stretch), so yeah lmao this is kinda like a thought experiment or something

thinking,, thinking about c!martyn and his birthday

3rd life started 2 weeks after his birthday, last and double life weren't close, rats missed it, pirates has a good chance of missing it, and that's in the future anyway

only limited life included it

martyn… spends the rest of his time in a void, regardless of which route you take, datastream or eyesandears (as we don't know how they connect yet, they're mostly separate? kinda? idk its complicated)

so… what's better: having your birthday in the midst of a death game, in a world that isn't real but feels painfully so, or alone in a void?

in a dark void where you're unconscious most of the time, and when you're not, you're being taunted? or in a green void where you can't so much as sleep like you had to back in the world you were torn from, the world that you only have one actual connection with, your only glimpse of reality being of that who trapped you in this mess and doesn't care enough to get you out already?

martyn's first birthday in the datastream likely would've been limited life, if that's how that would work (again, datastream~eyesandears, complicated)

he's still got another good 7 months until his next one

will he be out of the datastream by then? will doc have finally figured it out?

…why hasn't he yet?

…that's a question for another day. (sure, maybe he's said that dozens of times before, but… now's not the time, is all)

(…besides, it seems like he cares. but…- no, question for another day. whatever a day even is. he only really knows because doc makes him journal for every one that passes, not because it really holds any meaning right now.)

would he rather spend his birthday lonely and paranoid, lonely and paranoid, or lonely and paranoid?

either

in constant fear of death, being able to see just how much time you have left until then, knowing it could skip ahead by an hour or even two at a moment's notice.

people who were supposed to be your friends (and perhaps were in another life) trying to kill you on your birthday, throwing explosives down from the clouds onto your party on the one day you maybe thought you'd be allowed to enjoy yourself.

(and yeah, maybe you were planning on blowing up everyone else, too, but when you're red, can you really be blamed for wanting to spill some blood?)

(…everyone else feels like that, don't they? you're not the only one. you're stupid for thinking you'd be an exception to their bloodlust just because it's your birthday.)

or

in a void where your only waking moments aren't good ones. where you're taunted and berated and ridiculed for your mistakes, where you start to believe what you're told, that you failed your one job despite being given so many chances.

the void in which you last see Them before your only anything between these games abandon you for years?- months on end, only to reappear a game later in hopes of ruining your life. and you're pretty damn scared They succeeded. (you've felt, just, bad, for so long, that you're not sure things can get worse, yet they manage to every time. you're not sure when things got this bad, but it's Their fault, you know it is.)

…you're unconscious most of the time in this void, anyway. you're not sure why it feels like such an eternity every time.

or

in a lime green void, stretching on virtually endlessly (heh, virtually… ah, this is what you've resorted to for entertainment, isn't it?), with access to all you could ever dream of?

sure, maybe not the impossible—that's, well, impossible—and maybe not things that haven't been created yet, maybe some things are locked behind paywalls you can't bypass, or, or need for accounts–

oh, did you mention you can't leave any trace of your existence either? there's quite a few restrictions, actually—no accounts, no anonymous comments, no privacy, no friends, no family, no food, no drink, no sleep, no- no bodily functions, no.. no concrete sense of self, no… fellow(? are you even human anymore?) human interaction…

well, besides doc, but he's… busy. too busy to help you get out of here, too busy to…

to care where you land after pushing you through a portal to an unknown world with little to no warning,

to get… worried, when you stay months in the same game world, because these- these missions are meant to be a, a quick in and out, maybe a week, usually less, not… three whole months, and…

fuck did that hurt, leaving them all, but… the sooner you complete these missions for doc—what even are these missions, anyway? why-—the faster you'll be out of the datastream and.. back to reality. back to.. home… you think.

(why do these missions have such big gaps between them?

why– how is doc presumably fighting CHEST all by himself (well, not all by himself, you are the datastream defender, after all, even if that is just a made up title to make yourself feel better, even if you're barely an asset as opposed to a liability to doc)?

what does global ramifications entail?

why hasn't doc figured out how to get you out of here yet?

why does he not spend any time with you, he's your only real human contact, and even then, it's flakey!?

why does he make you journal every day? to keep you sane? you mean, it's hardly working, but why?

if doc cares, it'd be more than just whatever this is. or–…

…you've had this conversation before. you're just out of touch with social interaction. players and npcs are nothing like real people. you're just… wrong. and doc's right, because doc knows what's going on, and you don't, save for some tiny morsels of information. right. …nevermind.)

this is where i stopped ranting for the night, and i pick it back up on a similar topic this morning ^^

i wonder if, in the datastream lore, rats and pirates are made by the same people or not

if doc would have access to that information, if he would purposefully start avoiding powcreations, or purposefully seek out their game worlds

is martyn spending months in a game world, having fun instead of doing his job, a good thing in any way, in doc's eyes? or is it solely a distraction or vulnerability?

martyn goes to all these game worlds for a reason, he needs to find loot shards so doc can deal with them, but how does doc feel about martyn staying months instead of days? of martyn having fun? growing attached? forming emotional bonds with people who aren't real?

(doc tells martyn they aren't real. martyn has no reason not to believe him on that. (in fact, martyn tells himself they aren't real, because if they were, he's not sure he'd handle that well.) even though players can be awakened, they're still ultimately under an actual human's control—doc's told martyn this. martyn is... a special case. (and if they aren't quick enough, his situation could lose its uniqueness to the enemy. which, if it wasn't clear, isn't a good thing.))

it's ultimately not healthy, martyn knows, but he's been in the datastream a little over a year at this point. the only human interaction he has is doc, who barely seems to have time for him, and CHEST agents (he thinks? they may just be AI), which are actively trying to kill him, whatever that would mean for him. he doesn't like the thought.

so, maybe he's a bit lonely—okay, maybe very lonely—so can you really blame him for wanting to indulge? i mean… even if it isn't really reality, what's stopping it from acting as one? he'll… he'll always have to leave eventually, but… he may as well enjoy himself while he has the chance, right?

so what's to stop him from making friends with oli the trash rat, or oli the pirate? (they're almost eerily similar, all things considered, but martyn guesses that's what happens when you get lazy devs. everything else seems to have so much care put into it, though... why would they put in such little effort to player characters when so much goes into everything else?)

what's to stop him flirting with half the players on the faction isles and being responsible for the nickname "kisstrels"?

what's to stop him having a genuinely good time?

leaving rats was hard. it was the first time he felt he truly belonged somewhere in how long? longer than the datastream, for sure.

he was really starting to struggle at that point with the crushing loneliness and feelings of unreality, if he's honest. rats... rats was nice. rats was probably some of the most fun he's had.

and leaving pirates has every chance to be even harder.

with these new scars appearing (which he would assume to be a design thing if it weren't for the fact that they stayed with him in the datastream itself), and these new feelings occurring without reason or rhyme, he's starting to feel uneasy about being stuck in the datastream again. (he's never not felt uneasy about it. he just… manages to push it to the back of his mind(? does he still have one of those?), sometimes.)

he's spent a lot of his time thinking—a lot about the rats, admittedly—why does scott feel so much more familiar now than he did even after he left rats? so many of the rats always felt familiar, especially jimmy and oli, but why does he miss scott all of a sudden?

weird feelings like that had been beginning to pop up the past few months, along with scars he has no explanation for—i mean, seriously, why does he have at least three scars shaped like a four-pointed star? what would even cause that? he's fairly sure there's more, as well!—and it's been making him uneasy. most of all, it's been making him lonely.

pirates came at a good time, he thinks.

maybe his introduction wasn't the best, what, with doc shoving him through a portal just for him to fall from the sky into the ocean, then immediately getting scammed by scar—

why does scar feel so familiar? why does that seem so in character for him? he hasn't been in another game world which used his assets, has he?

—just to go to this weird corrupted purple island and lose two people along the way—

why does doc always put him in the center of the story? it can get so stressful at times! i mean, rats was stressful enough even before the other rats did stuff like blow up the boiler!

—but... i mean, he made a song for pirates. that's something he'd only previously done for rats (and wow, was that process painful, can you imagine how hard it is to make music while being a rat and staying secretive about your mission? speaking of secrets, he got pretty lucky with the whole pirate thing, for once he can be truthful about some part of why he's here, even if he has to stay vague), and even then, that wasn't really a serious song. this one's a full on song, water made sheet music and everything!

so, evidently, it's not that bad. it's quite the opposite, actually. martyn thinks he's going to have a pretty good time here, as a pirate.

(he's not sure why the pirate aesthetic, and the oceanic/aquatic aesthetic as a whole, actually, feels so familiar. like he's done this sort of thing recently...?

and... scott. scott feels related to that, for some reason. and scott's a heron, martyn fucking hates the herons (he'd never admit it, maybe except to the rats in his boots, but they're actually not that bad. it's more like a sibling rivalry, than anything).

…does this have something to do with martyn randomly missing rat scott the past few months? …does he miss rat scott, or does he miss scott? …these aren't real people, martyn, get it together, it's fine. you're fine. nothing to worry about.)

[updatingranboo]

(sorry for how long this is, I swear I tried to keep it short pfft)

Hi Day! I didn’t really know where to ask this, sorry in advance if this is the wrong place or something completely out of your wheelhouse. I know you have your ‘RanbooStartingSoon’ YT channel where you upload starting soons and on occasion vods that are missing from the official vods channel (like the missing LA vod, tysm for that btw !!) so you seemed like the best person that I could ask about this; 

Yesterday I was looking for a couple vods of Lethal Company from November, because I missed seeing them at the time and had never gotten around to seeing them- I wasn’t in a rush because I thought “well they’ll be on the vods channel!” but looking through I realized they’re totally missing from there, along with quite a few other vods from November- they’re still on twitch right now, but won’t be much longer.

The missing vods as far as I can tell are: the Thief Simulator 2 vod (which I think will be gone off of twitch tomorrow, Jan 19th if I’m not mistaken) the LC vods “THIS COMPANY SURE ISN’T NON LETHAL!”, “the lethalist of companies, the best of people”, and “2 years of having EYES (LETHAL COMPANY WITH HUGE LOBBY LATER!)”, along with the VR Kayaking vod, the “planning the project fundraiser subathon” vod, and the “absolutely massive announcements” vod. The vods from after the subathon are also missing, but I’m assuming (hoping) that those will be uploaded to the official vods channel soon, although the oldest of them is already 23 days old so I don’t know. 

There's other vods from before these missing, like the RGBtrio PayDay stream and Streamer's Court, but those aren't on twitch anymore so I'm assuming those are just lost sadly.

Basically, I was wondering if you’d consider uploading the missing vods at all? I imagine you probably never planned to upload that many vods, so I completely understand if it’s too much of a hassle and you can’t/don’t want to. And again, my apologies if this just isn’t in your wheelhouse, so sorry if I was a bother. 

Regardless, thank you for your time and thank you for all the updates you do! Hope you have a lovely timezone <3

hi there!! yeah I’m very painfully aware of how far backed up the vods channel is, it causes me stress daily LMAO. there’s already vods that have fallen off twitch that haven’t been uploaded, but I’ve been assured by the twitch vods manager they’ve been saved so i have to trust.

i try not to upload anything that is definitely going to be uploaded to the vods channel, because i don’t like taking away from the traffic to official channels, and i also am working with the tiniest hard drive known to man and just. don’t have the space to download full streams most of the time :(

i do have plans to upload both of the alt streams just because I’m paranoid but believe me, I’m just as stressed and i hope that when ranboo gets back from their break the channel picks up again because we are over 2 months behind now and i Don’t Like That as the resident media preservation freak

but thank you for reaching out, maybe I’ll change my mind if I can figure something out, but for now I’m just praying that the vods channel manager knows what they’re doing 😭

[drabbles-mc]

After Hours

Carmen 'Carmy' Berzatto & F!Reader

Whumptober 2022: No.31 A Light at the End of the Tunnel- Comfort

Warnings: 18+, language, smoking, grief/mourning, mental health, mentions of suicide, family deaths

Word Count: 2.8k

A/N: I trulyyyy cannot believe I made it to the end of Whumptober. A fic a day. Love it. Anyway. I wrote this fic in particular for me more than anyone else. It hits incredibly close to home.

A/N pt2: Shout-out to @narcolini and @garbinge for being my cheerleaders this whole month and listening to like??? Every thought that has popped into my head lmao. You two deserve medals. 🤝🏻💖

The Bear Taglist: idk how much i'm going to write for this series but if i do and you want to be tagged, let me know!

The two of you made your way down the steps of the church together. The door had barely shut behind him before Carmy was pulling a pack of cigarettes out of his jacket. He placed one between his lips and was about to tuck it away before he thought better of it. Glancing over at you, he held it out to you in a silent offer. You knew that you probably shouldn’t, but given everything that was going on, you figured it wasn’t going to be the end of the world.

You let him light it for you when you reached the bottom of the steps. You tucked the hand that wasn’t holding onto the cigarette into the pocket of your jacket, and he mirrored your actions. The air around the two of you was thrown into a haze of smoke for a moment as the two of you stood there in silence.

You cleared your throat as you tapped the ashes off the end of your cigarette onto the ground. “Wanna grab coffee? Or a bite?”

He raised his eyebrows, a little surprised by the offer. But he shrugged, nodding. “Yea, yea sure. Got a spot in mind?”

You chuckled, shaking your head. “Figured I’d leave that to you. I don’t want to pick the wrong spot to take the chef to.”

A tiny smile curled his lips before he took a drag off of his smoke. “Fair. Come on,” he nodded towards the crosswalk, “I know a spot a few blocks away.”

You walked side-by-side. You thought it was going to be weird walking together, not saying anything, but it wasn’t. The cigarettes were enough of a distraction, the fleeting streams of smoke passing between you putting just enough of a barrier as you walked.

Carmy stopped outside the front door of a restaurant that was definitely closed. All of the lights were off. He snubbed his cigarette out on the ground, crushing it beneath his shoe. You were about to say something when you heard the jingling of keys as he pulled them out of his pocket. He sifted through the ones on the ring until he found the one that he needed, putting it into the lock on the front door.

He’d flipped a few of the lights on, but most of the place was still dark. You were sitting awkwardly on one of the stools at the counter, waiting for Carmy to reappear with coffee. You had tried to reassure him that you really just asked to grab coffee or food as an opportunity to talk a little more—it wasn’t a request for him to start actually working. You figured he’d done enough of that all day before he even turned up at the meeting.

He reappeared with two coffee mugs held in one hand, and two plates balanced on the other. Your eyes widened at the slices of chocolate cake he was bringing out. You weren’t sure what he was going to come back with, but this was better than whatever you had been trying to think of.

“Holy shit.”

He chuckled as he set the plates and mugs down. “Good—was hoping that would be your response.”

You eagerly picked up your fork and dug in. “You make this?”

He shook his head. “No. My one chef here, this is like his fuckin’ thing. This and donuts.”

“Donuts?” You couldn’t pretend that you weren’t interested.

“Yea,” he took a sip of his coffee, “Come back when we’re open and you can be his taste-tester.”

You nodded as you took another bite of cake. “I just might.”

Things were quiet between the two of you for a minute, the only sounds were the clinking of your forks against the plate and your coffee mugs against the counter. Every now and then you’d look at him as he stood on the opposite side of the counter from you. He was leaning onto it, bracing his forearms against it. You thought about telling him that he could take a seat on the side next to you, but something told you that he wouldn’t. That’s not what he did here—he was always moving.

“So,” he broke the silence as he scooped more cake onto his fork, “are you, what, my fuckin’ sponsor now?”

You chuckled, shaking your head as you took a sip of coffee. “I don’t know, do you want me to be your fuckin’ sponsor?” You paused, looking at him as you each watched for the other’s facial reactions. You toyed with the mug in your hands. “I just, I don’t know. Just felt like there was more to say?”

“Baring my soul in group wasn’t enough for you?” he joked.

You laughed, shaking your head. “That’s not what I said.”

He nodded. “Right. Well,” he gestured with the fork in his hand, “this place says it all.”

You smiled. “It’s a nice addition to the trauma-dump. Adds extra flavor.”

He fought the urge to smile, instead just taking another bite of the cake on the plate in front of him. He tried to drag it out for as long as he could before he finally looked back over at you. “Your turn. You know all about me, but I don’t think I ever heard you talk at any of those meetings.”

“Well,” you leaned, bracing your arms almost the same way that he was, “maybe if you had showed up a little sooner, you would know all of my shit too.”

“Sorry my brother didn’t die on a convenient enough timetable.”

You laughed. “Siblings never do. It’s really fucking inconsiderate of them to be honest.”

He paused. “That why you’re there too? Sibling shit?”

You nodded. “Mhm. Been about…” your voice trailed off, “It’ll be three years tomorrow.”

Carmy’s eyes widened, “Shit.”

You chuckled, not because it was funny but because what the fuck else was there to do? “Yea.”

“I’d ask you about it, but I don’t want to take away your possible talking points tomorrow.”

You laughed, rolling your eyes. “It’s not like I’m writing it all out like a fucking commencement speech. I don’t,” you shrugged, “I don’t even know if I’m gonna go tomorrow.”

“No?”

You toyed with the little bit of cake that was still on your plate. “It’s different every year. Last year I went. It was nice. I talked but I didn’t say what day it was or anything. Didn’t really matter, you know? She’s still dead all the other three hundred sixty-four days of the year too. Year before that I didn’t even get out of my fucking bed to brush my teeth, let alone go to a meeting.”

His tone was hushed, “Fuck.”

You let out a quiet, sad laugh, “Yea.” You shook your head. “Fucking middle child.”

“You? Or your sister?”

“My sister.” You took a bite. “I’m the youngest too.”

“You really know how to pick the people you don’t sponsor, huh?”

You laughed. “Like a sniper I sit and wait in the back of those meetings waiting for the perfect target.”

“And then you don’t sponsor them?”

You smiled. “And then I don’t sponsor them.” You paused for a moment, trying to turn the conversation back off yourself. “I know this place comes with a lot of fucking baggage for you,” you gestured around the seating area of the restaurant, “but I think it’s…it could be good for you.”

“My fuckin’ stomach ulcers that are coming back beg to differ.”

You smiled at that. “You’ll be stressed enough for ulcers no matter where you go.”

“Got that from three monologues at meetings?”

You nodded. “That and the fact that you look like you maybe wash your hair once every two weeks and get more than four hours of sleep a night at about the same rate.”

He shook his head at you but didn’t argue. “Fuckin’ sniper.”

“Fuckin’ sniper.”

“What about your sister?”

“What about her?”

He shrugged. “What was she like? You know, since I’m a few years behind on the stories.”

You smiled. “Coming in mid-series, Carmy?” You chuckled, shrugging. “She was, you know,” you paused, “she was the worst sometimes, to be quite honest.”

He choked on his coffee for a moment, not expecting that response. He looked surprised and amused and unsure of how to reply to that all at once.

It got you to laugh. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry. But, I mean, it’s true. I love her. I love her so much. I would’ve taken a bullet for her. But we weren’t, you know, we weren’t those siblings that were best friends. We didn’t have a sibling group chat where we would text all the time. The three of us didn’t do weekly dinners. We didn’t party together or whatever the fuck siblings do.”

“Siblings do that?” he asked with a quiet laugh.

You shrugged, smiling. “Apparently.” You paused. “But yea. I mean, she was smart, you know? The kind of smart where she didn’t even have to fucking try. Which was infuriating for me personally, if you were curious,” you chuckled, “She could’ve done anything that she wanted. She could just…focus on something until she was great at it. And it never even took that long. Baking, drawing, photography, writing, you name it. Everything she did, she was good at. Fuckin’ annoying.”

There was a small smile on his face. “I bet.”

“She used to decorate cakes, actually.”

He perked up slightly at that. “Yea?”

You nodded. “Yea. Didn’t leave me a bakery or anything, thank god,” you laughed, “but that was her thing. She was good at that too, in case you were wondering.”

He chuckled. “Of course.”

It was quiet between you for a moment before you said. “We didn’t really start getting along until a few months before she died.” You noticed the way that Carmy stilled on the other side of the counter, hands motionless as he listened to whatever you had to say next. “Like I said, it’s not like we were best friends growing up. I always loved her, but we definitely didn’t always like each other, you know? Things were finally getting better and then, you know, she killed herself. Which, you know, rude,” you chuckled.

Carmy’s eyes widened as he shook his head, but he couldn’t help but to let out a laugh too.

“Like I said,” you took the last bite of cake on your plate, “inconsiderate.”

“Would you rather you didn’t?” he asked.

Your brows furrowed in confusion. “Didn’t what?”

He hesitated, like he regretted saying it but it was too late to take it back now. He raked his hands back through his hair. “You think it would’ve been better if you didn’t start getting along again?”

“Not to sound like an asshole,” you prefaced your statement, “but given what you’ve said about you and your brother, I don’t think there’s really a good position to be in with it. I think the only thing that would make it better is if they didn’t kill themselves.”

“That feels…obvious.”

“It is,” you gave a weak smile.

“I didn’t go to his funeral.”

You nodded. “I get it.”

“Did you?”

“We had a wake. We cremated her so there wasn’t a burial or anything. I went to the wake, though. I thought I was gonna cry, or be a whole mess or whatever, but I wasn’t. I cried once. Everyone else was crying a lot though. My mom said I didn’t have to go if I didn’t want to.”

“You wanted to?”

You shrugged. “I didn’t not want to go. But I mean, come on, you know what it’s like. No one wants to do anything when it comes to their brother or sister dying. It’s not…it’s not a good gauge.” You paused. “You regret not going?”

He shook his head. “It’s not gonna make him any less dead. He…he doesn’t care that I wasn’t there.”

“Yea. It all feels kind of useless, huh?”

“Most of it, yea.”

You toyed with you nearly-empty coffee cup, spinning it between your palms. “I like this.”

“What?”

“Being here. I don’t know, it’s better than sitting in some diner or something somewhere where other people can hear you.” You paused. “Most people don’t like when I make Dead Sister Jokes.”

“That’s because they don’t have a dead sister.”

You pointed at him from across the counter. “Exactly.”

“Does it get less shitty?” he asked. “Do the meetings actually fucking help?”

You shrug. “They help, yea. But it’s more than the meetings. You gotta, you know, you gotta do the fucking work. Grief sucks. Having other people who get it is nice. You can say flippant things like we do that other people would gasp at because how could you say that about them they’re dead. But you gotta feel it. Meetings are only a few hours of your week. You live with yourself all the fucking time.” You took a sip of your coffee. “The feelings don’t get smaller. You just, you know, you grow bigger around them. The grief is still there. The pain sucks just as much now as it did three years ago. But I have more breathing space around it now than I did back then.”

“Was really hoping you were gonna say some shit like, ‘yea five more meetings and you’ll be good to go’,” Carmy said with a quiet laugh.

You shook your head with a smile. “You got a lot of legwork to go before that. Can’t fast-track it. You…you know about that, though.” You saw his brows knit together and your smile grew a little wider. “What? I listen. All the work you did before you got here?” you tapped the surface of the counter. “Same shit.”

“It’s not the same shit.”

“It is. It sucks. You’re gonna lose sleep and throw up and lose track of hours. It’s going to feel like it’s your whole fucking world sometimes. And it is. But it isn’t. The work is constant and it’s thankless and infuriating. But you can’t stop doing it.” You paused. “You seem like a glutton for punishment. You’ll be fine.”

“Real fuckin’ reassuring,” he said with a chuckle.

“It doesn’t have to be terminal,” you motioned back and forth between the two of you, “We’re proof of that.”

“Or it’s gonna take more than three years to kill us.”

You laughed, nodding. “Or that, yea. Guess we’ll have to wait and see.” You paused, using your fork to point at his plate. “You done with that?”

He smiled slightly, sliding it across the counter to you without a word. You didn’t say anything as you tucked into what was left of his piece. The stillness of the restaurant around you felt calming in a way. You knew it probably wasn’t really ever like this once there were other people there. You wondered if Carmy ever stayed here off-hours to enjoy the peace and quiet of it. You wondered if he was even capable of enjoying it.

“You had mentioned that you were a chef,” you said as you corralled the crumbs left on his plate, “but I never thought about where.”

“This is it,” he said with a nod.

“So if I come back during the day, you’ll be running around back there yelling and screaming like a chicken with your head cut off?”

He laughed. “Yea. Me and everyone else.”

“Who’s everyone else?”

“Come back and you’ll see,” he said as he swiped up the forks and empty plates. He was disappearing back into the kitchen again before you could even try to pry or crack a joke about it.

Neither of you said it, but you both knew that it was time to go. You could’ve stayed and talked the rest of the night away, but the reality of it was that you both had lives to get to when the sun came up. Very different lives, but still.

“Does it get less weird,” Carmy asked as he put his jacket back on, walking towards the door as he spoke, “getting to know people in the opposite fucking order than you’re used to?”

You laughed, knowing exactly what he meant. “Yea. But the tradeoff is that the more time that goes on, the weirder it gets getting to know people who don’t know this stuff about you.”

“Hell of a way to break the ice,” he said as he locked the doors again.

You shook your head with a smile. “Yea, it breaks it for sure.” You took a deep breath as the two of you stood, each of you debating on how to say goodbye. That was another thing that never got less weird no matter how much someone knew about you. Your hands were tucked safely in the pockets of your coat as you said, “I’ll see you around?”

He nodded. “Yea, for sure.” He paused. “Think you’re gonna go tomorrow?”

You shrugged. “Don’t know. I’ll see how I feel in the morning. Either way,” you nodded towards the door, “I might come back for one of those donuts you mentioned.”

He chuckled, tucking his chin for a moment against the cold night air. “Alright.”

“Later, Carmy.”

“Later,” he offered up another small smile before you turned and started down the sidewalk.

[scryarchives]

𝐥𝐨𝐬𝐭 𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐝𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐫 - 𝐢𝐭𝐚𝐝𝐨𝐫𝐢 𝐲𝐮𝐮𝐣𝐢 | 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝟑

tadashi joins jujutsu tech, and it's not without a warm welcome.

masterlist | previous , next !

–pairings: itadori yuuji x oc

– warning: mentions of panic attacks, fluff, canon divergent, pre-shibuya arc

– author’s note: man writing in first pov is really tough. i found myself cringing 90% of the time lmao

disclaimer: i’m not of japanese descent and am unfamiliar with japanese honorifics, etc. feel free to correct me!

My breathing was ragged, vision blurry with saline escaping from my eyes, landing on the lenses of my glasses. I ripped the rimmed frames off my face and the back of my hand rushed to wipe the cascade of tears away. I winced at the rough feeling of strands of my hair getting in the way, causing friction against my skin that was softened from salty tears.

Anger, It was all I could feel in the moment.

A scream filled my ears, but I couldn’t feel it leave my throat. My legs burned from running, an ache spreading through my muscles, a fire blossoming in my chest. Pain had become a new friend of mine.

My thoughts began to slow down, the tears along with them, but the painful burn remained, spreading through my being. I couldn’t help the way my fists clenched the hairs of my head, the way my jaw was clamped shut.

I could keep the voices away for so long.

A minute passed– no, thirty, and I still had nowhere to go. My mind was clear by then, and I had nothing on me, other than my half-dead phone, and a couple thousand Yen. Enough for a meal and a room for the night.

I sighed, cursing at my bad fortune before looking around me to see nothing but fields of lush, green grass, the bridge I now sat upon, and the blue-to-orange sunset that once was the crystal blue sky. Below me, the bubbling of a stream; calm and steady, in contrast to my turmoil.

My phone was my first option, food and lodging are the least of my current problems. The trouble was finding the right person to call. 

Right, there were only five contacts on my phone.

Perhaps I could give Fumi a ring? No, she’d be busy with her high school stuff. Doesn’t stop me from missing her, though. 

Nobara maybe? She’s moved to Tokyo, too late for that now. 

Don’t even get me started on Eiji, the poor kid’s schoolwork has been building up since he joined more clubs. Besides, he’d just run to Dad.

Oh right. Dad. Out of the question.

My finger hovered over the last contact, biting my lip harder than I should’ve as the pain returned tenfold.

Nobara it is.

I waited, my fingers finding distraction with the loose threads of my shirt as the dial tone kept me on my toes, my hopes raised only to be crushed with the next tone. 

“Hallo?”

At last, my torture was over.

“Nobara, hey!” I could feel a natural smile growing on me. 

“Tsu, is that you?”

“Who else would it be, hah. How’s Jujutsu Tech? Any fun?”

“Tsu-tsu, I’ve been here for three days, and I’ve already been sent on a mission,” She groans in exasperation, a chuckle escaping me.

“At least you’ve got something to do there. Are your classmates nice?”

“Well, one’s a potato face, but he’s nice, I guess. The other’s got this high-and-mighty attitude, he only gave his name, can you believe it?”

I wince playfully at her tone, imagining her annoyed expression.

“Yeesh, must be tough being the only girl there.”

“Honestly it’s such a struggle not having a girl friend here to do girl stuff with. Tsu, I wanna go shopping so bad in Shibuya but these lessons really wear me down!” She huffs, and I can see her crossed arms. “You really should’ve come with me. All your talent’s being wasted in that nothing town.”

A silence fell over me and the cogs were set in motion.

“You’re right. What does it take to get into Jujutsu Tech?”

“And right over here should be your dorm,” Miss Shouko, as she called herself during the introduction, pointed to the door in front of me before I pushed it open.

The breeze was all I could feel from the open sliding door opposite the entrance, a simple white bed resting against the wall as a desk sat across it. I pulled my suitcase in, taking in a deep breath as I admired the view of the green trees, the blue skies, everything.

“Light traveller?” She questioned, her long brown hair resting on her shoulders despite the sway of stray strands from the light wind.

“No, Shouko-sama,” I didn’t look back at her much, choosing to find a place to keep my suitcase. I could always unpack later.

“I didn’t have much to begin with.”

“I see. Well, I’ll leave you to it. Don’t make too much of a noise, and remember curfew is at 6 pm, 6:15 latest.”

“I’ll keep that in mind,” I nodded, walking her to the door. “Thank you again, for the help Shouko-sama.”

“It’s my job as a teacher here, but sure. If you need anything, you know where to find me.”

I nodded again, a habit I might be developing after accepting the fact that I was back in school again.

“Oh and one last thing,” She turned around, peering at me in curiosity. “What did you answer when Principal Yaga asked you the question?”

Without a moment of hesitation, I answered once more, with just as much confidence as I had when I stood before Jujutsu Tech’s formidable principal.

“I want to be a sorcerer because I don’t want anyone to suffer at the hands of curses as I have, and I’m willing to do anything in my power to protect others from going through what I did. They don’t deserve it. They never did.”

I watched the way Miss Shouko hummed, a small smile growing on her lips as she chuckled to herself quietly, not in a mocking fashion, but in one of amusement.

“You’re gonna get along just fine with his other students.”

“Who’s the other students?” I questioned, and Miss Ieri’s hand landed on my shoulder.

“You’ll find out tomorrow. Go unpack and rest, your schedule will be passed to you in an hour or so.”

“Okay, thanks, Shouko-sama.”

“Anytime, kid.”

The click of the door’s lock was the sign that I was alone again, the chirping of birds filling my empty dorm room as I let out a soothed sigh. Nature was truly beautiful in such moments.

I then turn to my suitcase, kneeling to unpack it as I slide it back from under the bed — it’d be better to unpack now and rest than sleep and panic over my things tomorrow.

However, just as I unzipped my bag, a knocking at my room door pulled me away from my task at hand.

“It can’t be Shouko-sama,” I find myself muttering out loud as I near the wooden door. “She said the timetable would only be here in an hour…”

“Tadashi!!” 

The door then burst open, revealing the familiar redhead I missed while in Tohuku. Nobara’s exuberant energy filled the small room, and I instantly forgot about unpacking, as my childhood friend pulled me into a hug.

“Ehhh, why didn’t you tell me where your room was? I had to run into Shouko-sama to find out where you were,” She pouted, pulling away with an accusatory finger.

I winked back playfully, Nobara giving me a hard shove on the shoulder.

“I was planning for it to be a surprise, but you found me anyway. Shokou-sama told me that I would get along with the rest of my classmates, but I don’t even know who my teacher is,” Nobara hums. “How did you find out who your teacher was?”

“Well, I arrived in Tokyo, and I was standing around at our meet-up place, and then Gojou-sensei appeared with Itadori and Fushiguro,” She placed her finger on her chin in thought. “But you’ll probably meet your teacher tomorrow during class. Did you get your uniform though?”

“Ah, yeah, it’s in my bag. Didn’t want to get it dirty on the way here.”

“Oh! Take it out, take it out! I wanna see how it looks on you!!” She squealed, rushing over to my bag to pull it out for me instead.

I let out a little sigh, but take my uniform, walking to my bathroom to put my outfit on.

“Give me a few, but I’m warning you, it’s nothing special.”

“Tsu-tsu, you make anything look special,” I hear Nobara call back out to me. “By the way, you don’t mind if I invite a few friends over right?”

“Eh? You’ve made friends already?” 

“Oh don’t worry, you, Saori and Fumi will always be my childhood friends,” She chimes, and I sigh escapes me once more while I pull my long, dark blue shirt over my head.

I fiddle with the buttons as I hum, smoothing out the shirt before looking at my reflection, ignoring the mild discomfort I feel. My skirt’s on next, and as I’m smoothing out, I can’t help but hear the little whispers of the voices in my head.

It doesn’t look right.

A frown rests on my face as I run a hand through my hair, gathering it into a ponytail. A jolt of pain runs through me as I tug my hair tighter, and I feel my throat tighten in fear.

“Tsubame,” I hear Nobara calling from outside. 

No, I’ll just leave my hair down.

“You’ve been in there for a while, I don’t remember the uniform being that difficult to wear.

“Ah, s-sorry about that,” I smile, pulling the bathroom door open, ignoring the way I let a little stutter slip out.

I can see Nobara notices from the way her eyebrow raises. She chooses to ignore it as she takes in my uniform, a wide, encouraging smile spreading across her face.

“You look so good, oh my gosh!” She grins, snapping a photo of me before running over to hug me tight.

“Nobara!” I hiss, and I feel my face warm in embarrassment. “Delete that now, I’m begging you!!”

“Never, that’s going in the blackmail folder,” She giggles and I give in with a huff. “Aw, don’t pout, it’s gonna give you wrinkles sooner.”

“Uh-huh… so did you invite your friends over?”

“I did!” She chirps. “But if you’re not comfortable with it…”

“It’s fine. I need more friends anyway.”

A knock at the door appears again, and Nobara ends up with a wider grin than before. I can feel something up her sleeve despite knowing her for the last eight years as I watch the way she practically skips towards my dorm’s door.

“You’re finally here!” She calls out with the door wide open, but I can’t see who stands at the entrance. “You guys took ages, geez.” 

She huffs, letting two boys into my room. The two are taller than Nobara and are definitely taller than me as well. 

The first of the two smiled apologetically as he held a plastic bag in his free hand, the other in the pocket of his dark teal hoodie. He had messy, salmon-pink hair with an undercut, warm brown eyes and two little marks underneath both of his eyes.

The second had spiky black hair and blue eyes. He had a frown and dark pants and tee, and trailed behind the first boy, hands shoved into his pockets.

“Sorry, Kugisaki-chan,” I hear a boy say. He sounds energetic. “We got lunch if you guys were hungry.”

“What food is so important that it got you delayed?”

“We got sushi,” The second guy quipped, and Nobara was instantly silent. I smiled at Nobara’s antics.

“Ugh, fine, you’re forgiven,” She grumbled.

Seeing that I was most likely forgotten, I cleared my throat slightly and watched the three turn their heads. I suddenly felt nervous under all their stares.

“Oh right,” Nobara grinned, walking over to my side to wrap an arm around my shoulders.

“This is Shu Tadashi,” She smiled in pride. “A childhood friend of mine from Tohoka.”

“Fushiguro Megumi,” The dark-haired boy with a gloomy face answered. He held his hand out for me to shake it and I took it.

“How long have you been a user?”

“As long as Nobara, but I think I’m finally ready to be one,” I answered straightforwardly, and he nodded his head before the other boy appeared before me.

“Itadori Yuuji!” He grinned widely. “I’m a new sorcerer too, so don’t you worry about falling behind. I’m way further back.”

I let out a small scoff as we shook hands. I ignored the way I felt a small jolt when our palms met, and how warm his hand was.

He felt like the sun. Radiant and bright.

Nobara eyed me when I pulled away, and she must’ve noticed how I lingered before retracting my hand. Her clap made me jump slightly, loud and sudden against the usually quiet atmosphere of the room.

“Now that introductions are over, let’s get started on lunch!”

gif by @heycaz

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