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fific7 · 3 years

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Souls Adrift

Secret Santa Fic Exchange

Billy Russo x Reader

A/N: This is part of @flightlessangelwings and @the-purity-pen Ben Barnes Secret Santa fic exchange, and is written for @sageswritings - hope you enjoy it!

Happy Holidays!🎅☃️🎄

Summary: This is a oneshot Soulmate story set in my S1 Punisher AU which does not follow canon and features Arrogant!BillyRusso. It’s written from Billy’s POV.

Warnings: Slightly 18+ NSFW due to mentions of sex. Drinking and swearing.

(My video edit)

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Billy Russo shot his cuffs out beyond his jacket sleeves and regarded himself in the mirror. Yeah looking good, Russo. He smoothed his hair back again and as he did so, caught sight of the very faint star outline on his inner right wrist.

He dropped his hand and pulled his cuff down, irritated. Soulmate, huh? Complete and utter bull-shit. Never gonna happen.

Apparently, when you met your soulmate the star outline turned burning bright for a few seconds then settled down, looking more like an actual tattoo, and the two soulmates would have matching colours. Well, it hadn’t happened to him yet, he doubted it ever would and truth be told, he didn’t want it to.

He didn’t want to be tied down to one woman! That just wasn’t his thing. He cleared his throat, thinking that he’d need to get himself out to a bar tonight, find a suitable candidate to be the next recipient of his admirable attentions. Only a temporary recipient of course. He’d either go to her place or maybe a hotel if she didn’t live locally, and he’d be gone before the bedsheets got too warm.

Satisfied, he walked out of his bedroom and through his spacious apartment, ready to face another busy day at Anvil.

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

Entering one of his local hangouts that evening, he headed to the bar and leaned on it, waiting until he caught the barman’s eye and then ordering a whisky straight up.

Drink served, he lifted it and took a sip, turning and lounging back against the bar, perusing the women in his vicinity like a panther stalking its prey. His eyes swept over them but no-one caught his immediate attention.

Not tall enough, not small enough, too made up, not made up enough, dressed too provocatively, not dressed provocatively enough. He shook his head, turning back and leaning on the bar, ordered a beer.

Looked like it was going to be a much longer night than he’d anticipated. He sighed. Billy was not a patient man.

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

He was just finishing his beer when he became aware of someone next to him. His head swivelled slightly, using his sniper training to look while it seemed like he wasn’t. It was a woman, and his antennae immediately went up. Just his type. Just right.

He leant in towards her as he noticed she hadn’t been able to order yet. “Hey… can I buy you a drink?”

She looked at him, and he felt a stirring in his pants. He looked back into the deep pools of her eyes and knew that he was definitely interested in her. Very interested indeed.

“Thank you for offering, but no thank you,” she replied, giving him a small smile and turning back towards the barman, who was now heading towards her.

Billy’s animal instincts started peaking, a chase! Just what he liked. Well, things that came too easy were boring. He lightly laid his hand on her wrist, “Aww, c’mon, it’s just a drink…” but stopped speaking before he could carry on with one of his smart comebacks. He could feel a burning sensation on his right wrist.

He pulled his sleeve back, the star was burning! He noticed she was doing the same, having pulled up the sleeve of her leather bomber jacket. She too had a burning star outline on her right wrist. He watched as the bright outline died down and looked from his wrist to hers, seeing that both of them now had a sparkling midnight blue star shape on there.

They both looked up at the same time, her eyes as wide as his.

Billy Russo swiftly shoved himself away from the bar and started pushing through the crowd, barging people aside until he got to the door.

He pulled it open and ran right out into the street.

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

Opening the door to his apartment he rushed inside and slammed it behind him, heading straight to the bottle of whisky he kept on the kitchen counter.

He sloshed a healthy amount into a tumbler and swigged most of it, before grabbing his phone out of his pocket and hitting “Frankie” on his speed dial.

As soon as he heard the answering growl, he blurted, “I just met my soulmate!!!” There was a loud peal of laughter in response, “That’s freakin’ hilarious, Russo!” “No, it isn’t, Frankie, it really isn’t. I don’t want a fuckin’ soulmate, you know I don’t!” Frank’s voice faded slightly and Billy heard him yelling, “Karen! Russo met his soulmate tonight and he’s panickin’ like a lil bitch!”

Billy scowled as he heard this and yelled back to empty air, “No I’m not! I’m not panickin’ okay?!”

He heard Karen’s voice, “You do sound panicky, Billy, I have to say. Didn’t you want to meet your soulmate? Most people are overjoyed when they do.”

“No! I’m happy as I am.”

“Are you, Billy, are you really? With all those one night stands? No-one to come home to every evening? To speak to, tell them about your day, have them look after you?”

“I…” Billy suddenly felt his voice catch in his throat, “I’ve never ever had that in my life so why would I need that now, huh Karen? I’ve got by just fine without one and I don’t want tied down!”

He heard Karen sigh, “Well, if you say so Billy, but I think you’re making a big mistake.”

Bristling, Billy snapped, “An’ so what if I am?! I’ll do what I damn well please. G’night, Karen,” and cut the call before she could say anything else. His phone rang a second or so later and he knew it was Frank. He answered, knowing that he’d probably been quite rude to Karen, “OK I’m sorry, I know I was snappy, say sorry to Karen for me.”

Frank huffed, “Yeah okay, Russo - she was only tryin’ to help, y’know? And I think you’re makin’ a mistake too, case you’re interested.”

“Look I hear you and Karen and what ya think, Frankie but it’s not for me, okay? I’m just gonna carry on like I was and that’s the end of it.” Frank sighed, “Well, whatever you say Russo, but I think you’re gonna regret this.”

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

A couple of days later, Billy and Frank met up with Karen at their favourite local diner for lunch. They were all looking through the menu making their choices, and Frank remarked, “Dunno why you bother looking at the menu, Bill - you always choose the same thing every time,” and turned to Billy with a smirk. But Billy was no longer sitting next to him. Frank did a double take and then looked over at Karen, “Where’d Bill go?!”

Karen grinned and pointed under the table, continuing to look at her menu. Frank looked down and saw Billy crouched on all fours - a bit of a squeeze - under there. “Bill…” started Frank, but Billy hissed “Sssssh!” at him. “Whoooo you avoiding, Billy?” smirked Karen, also looking down at him.

Billy grimaced at her, “Someone I don’t want to bump into again, okay?” Karen looked around and spotted an attractive woman standing over at the counter. “Would that be your soulmate, by any chance, Billy?” He rolled his eyes at her from under the table, whisper-yelling “Yes! It is. Alright? Satisfied?” at her. He saw Karen’s legs start to move out of the booth and he scrambled up off the floor, making it back into his seat just in time to see Karen marching up to his soulmate.

“Awww, shit!” he exclaimed. Frank chuckled, “C’mon Bill, what’d you expect? You know Karen’s not about to let your soulmate get away from you.” Billy started rearranging the cutlery on the tabletop, then decided that he wasn’t going to have this happen. No way was he gonna have this forced on him.

He bolted out of the diner.

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As he’d been half-expecting, there was a peremptory knock at his apartment door a little while later. Frank walked in as soon as Billy opened the door, plunking himself down on the sofa and saying, “Get me a beer, Russo.” Billy huffed but went to the fridge, pulling two bottles out of it and popping the caps, asking, “Where’s Karen?” as he handed one to Frank.

“Still chattin’ to your soulmate,” grinned Frank, “but you already knew that.” Billy nodded, “Guess I did. What’re they talkin’ about?” Frank shot him a look and Billy nodded again, “Okay, okay - me.” Frank took a gulp of his beer and then replied, “Yup.” Billy sat down in the armchair, sighing. “She’s not gonna bring her here, is she?” he asked, apprehensively. “Nope, she wouldn’t go that far, Bill.” Billy blew out a relieved breath, “I don’t want a soulmate, Frankie,” he said firmly, “Karen’s gotta stop this crusade. It’s not gonna work.”

Frank smiled, “Look, Maria was my soulmate and Karen’s never met hers. She’s secretly sad cos of that. I’m fine with the fact we’re not soulmates but she wants a happy ending for someone… and that’s you.” Billy set his beer bottle down on the floor, grumbling, “But I don’t wanna be tied down to just one woman.” “You say you don’t, but that’s cos you never stay with anyone longer’n the time it takes you to screw ‘em.” Billy laughed, “I know, I know… but I just don’t understand why anyone would wanna do that, stick with just one person?”

Frank rolled his eyes, “Bill - give it a try, at least? You’ll never know unless you do. And the best person to give it a go with’s gotta be your soulmate, right? Just stop runnin’ out on her, at least sit down and talk to her.” Reluctantly, Billy nodded, “Yeah, yeah, okay… just to keep Karen happy though! An’ I’m not promisin’ anything, you hear?”

He spotted a triumphant little smile on Frank’s face, and knew that Karen was going to go all out to make this soulmate bullshit work for him, while Billy was determined not to get entangled in it. He began worrying that he’d got himself into something really messy that he was going to totally regret.

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

Karen had literally danced round his apartment, skipping and clapping her hands like a little kid when Billy told her that he would at least meet up with his soulmate. Frank had looked fondly at her and even Billy - not in a happy mood about all of this - had to smile.

She then sat down and told him the few things she’d learned about his soulmate when they’d chatted in the diner… her name, her age, where she worked and the neighbourhood she lived in. Karen had managed to get Billy to admit that he’d spoken to her in the bar that night because he had in fact been hitting on her.

“So you were going after her! That means she’s your type then, doesn’t it? Excellent!” She clapped her hands again, “Well, she seems to be a lovely person, and I just know you’re going to love her!”

Billy sighed in defeat. He knew Karen was already thinking about what hat she’d buy to wear to the wedding.

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

Karen had of course texted his soulmate the next day and set up a date for her to meet Billy for lunch as soon as possible. No letting the grass grow with Karen, and he knew she wanted to arrange it before he changed his mind.

Sitting once again in one of the diner booths, Billy squirmed nervously and kept looking over every time the door opened. Was this how you felt on a first date? He’d never been on one so had no clue. He didn’t date, he just bedded and moved on. That’s how it worked in his world and you know what they say… if it ain’t broke…

He continued to feel on edge as the minutes dragged on. She was going to be late, he thought sourly, just great! Billy was a punctuality freak, probably due to his military background. So this was a black mark straight away. And apart from anything else, he really didn’t want to be here. Well, he’d give her another five minutes and then he was gone. He began to feel less nervous. Yeah - that’d be perfect. It would keep Karen happy because he’d actually turned up like he’d promised he would, but if his soulmate couldn’t even be bothered to arrive on time, well he couldn’t be blamed for running out on her again, could he?

Then he heard the door open and looked up to see her walking into the diner. He felt his heart give a little leap. Hey! What was all that about? Just nerves, yeah absolutely just nerves. She caught sight of him and made her way over to him. She wasn’t smiling and neither was he.

“You’re late,” were the first words out of his mouth as she reached his booth. A look of irritation flitted over her face, “What? You deal in nanoseconds, do you? Are you an astrophysicist or something?!” He looked down at his watch and saw that the second hand had moved just 10 seconds past the hour. He felt his face flush with embarrassment. “Sorry,” he mumbled, not making eye contact. “Umm… I didn’t quite catch that?” He looked up and saw that she was still standing in front of him, arms crossed in front of her, looking highly unimpressed. Sunlight suddenly flooded in through the diner window and illuminated her, like a heavenly spotlight.

Billy caught himself thinking that she looked magnificent, like an avenging goddess or something.

Oh hell. Without a doubt, he was getting an erection. Was that inappropriate? Well, he had begun this whole thing by hitting on her in the first place. So it was a given that he found her attractive. He pulled his sweater further down across his lap and indicated the other side of the table, “Look, I’m sorry, okay? Please, sit with me.” Still eyeing him like he was something nasty she’d stepped in, she slid into the booth opposite him. He continued, “I usedta be a Marine.” She nodded, “Yeah, I know. Karen told me. And that’s relevant, why?”

He cleared his throat nervously, “Well, I’m a little OCD about time-keeping, s’all.” A ghost of a smile crossed her lips, “Okay, I’ll accept that as your excuse for greeting me like a parade ground sergeant.” He felt his face flush even more. “I am really sorry, m’nervous about all-a this. Lemme start over…” She nodded so he continued, “I’m Billy. Pleased to meet you.” He extended his hand, they shook and she smiled, giving him her name before adding, “Not sure you are pleased to meet me, though.” He looked at her, confused, “Huh?” “Well you’ve run out the door as if I’ve got the plague - mmm, twice now?”

She’d picked up her menu at that point to choose something to eat as the waitress had arrived at their table. Once they’d ordered and coffees had been poured for each of them, he said, “Look, I… I gotta be honest with you. I don’t want a soulmate.” She’d put sugar in her coffee and stopped mid-stir, looking over at him, amused. “And what makes you think I do?”

Billy felt his mouth dropping open slightly. He’d never even considered this possibility. Had just assumed that she’d want to be with him… because… because… well, women were into that sorta stuff, weren’t they? Look at Karen!

She was still looking at him, now highly amused. “I take it you didn’t think of that, Billy?” It was the first time she’d said his name, and he felt his heart give that little leap again. “I… uhh… I, no… guess I didn’t,” he muttered, hating how lame he sounded.

“Well,” she carried on, brightly, “now that we’ve established that neither us of want to be together, let’s just have a nice lunch and then we never need to see each other again.”

Billy stomach lurched. What?!

“But… but... we…. I…” he heard himself stutter out, but she merely smiled at him then looked up as the waitress put their plates down in front of them.

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

An hour later, Billy was walking forlornly back to his apartment alone. They’d parted outside the diner, she wishing him a cheery ‘Goodbye’ before turning on her heel and disappearing into the crowd of passersby.

She’d asked him lots of questions about himself and his company and before he knew it, lunch was over and she’d been taking out her wallet to pay. He’d scrambled to get his own wallet out and insisted that he was paying. She’d politely thanked him, and then just as politely said goodbye to him and walked out of his life.

No exchanging numbers, no addresses given, no suggestions to meet up again.

Billy came to a halt in the middle of the street, causing a couple of people to bump into him. He ignored them as he realised with a start that he was feeling bereft.

Yes… totally bereft. That was the only way to describe it.

Hey, hold on! Since when did he develop a need to have his soulmate in his life?

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

Karen stared at Billy. “Why didn’t you ask her to meet up again? You dolt!” Billy was feeling miserable and this wasn’t helping. They’d shown up not long after he got home. He looked from Frank’s disbelieving face to Karen’s annoyed one, and shrugged. “She said we didn’t ever have to meet up again after lunch was over. I’m not gonna ask her after she said that!”

“Get her number? Her address? Then she’d have known you were interested in at least keeping in touch!” “She said she didn’t want a soulmate!” huffed Billy. “Yeah, after you said to her that you didn’t want one! Of course she’s going to say she doesn’t want one either.” Billy shrugged again, “Nah, she meant it. She wasn’t just sayin’ it for effect.” Frank muttered, “Can’t believe you’ve changed your mind, Bill. Think it’s cos she said she’s not interested in you?”

“No!” snarled Billy. “Well, Bill, why is it then?” Billy leaned back in his armchair, “Dunno, do I?”

Karen blew out a breath of air, “Oh, it’s obvious! She’s your soulmate! It’s difficult to ignore that pull.” Billy was just about to snap back asking how she knew that when she didn’t have one herself, but then thought better of it. “But I didn’t want a soulmate!” He realised he’d spoken in the past tense, “Don’t want a soulmate! Doesn’t the universe take that into account?!” “Nope,” said Karen firmly, “it doesn’t.”

She gave him a sly look, “And it’s also obvious that you do want your soulmate - now!” Billy shot her an irritated glance, “Yeah, but I found her - find her - attractive from the get-go so it probably is just something like Frankie said,” he glanced across at her friend, who had a satisfied smirk on his face, before looking back to Karen, “so when she said she’s not interested I just… I just…” “Wanna chase after her and capture her?” smirked Karen. “Yeah… whatever,” said Billy, “Anyhow, it don’t matter any more ‘cause she doesn’t wanna hear from me.”

Karen flourished a scrap of paper at him, “Her number!” she pronounced, triumphantly. “You get in touch with her, Billy Russo, or so help me, I’ll beat you black and blue!”

Billy’s eyes widened. The way Karen was glaring at him right now, he could honestly believe she’d do it.

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

He left it a couple of days. But the scrap of paper felt like it was burning a hole in his inside jacket pocket, so eventually he took it out and flattened it down on his desktop. He stayed looking at it for several minutes, weighing the pros and cons of calling her to and fro in his mind. Should he, shouldn’t he? What was the worst thing that could happen? She could hang up on him. Yes, she could but he could live with that. Couldn’t he?

Squaring his shoulders, he slid his phone out of his pocket and dialled her number.

He cleared his throat as he listened to it ringing out. Then her voicemail clicked in, he heard her voice giving a brief message and he cursed, thankfully before the beep sounded. “Uhhh… hi. This is Billy. Hi. Er, Billy Russo. Your… er.. soulmate, you remember? I know we said we didn’t need to see each other again but uhhh… well I just thought… like, I was thinkin’… that we could maybe meet for a drink every so often. Catch up. Like, y’know, friends. Nothin’ heavy. Nothin’…” He heard another beep, and cursed again. Now he’d have to ring back. Shit! So he did, and rushed through giving her his number and saying to call him if she’d like to meet up.

He cut the call and slid his phone back into his pocket. He was twitchy, nervous, had that ‘heart in his mouth’ feeling. What the fuck was wrong with him? He shook his head and pulled out some of the personnel files he’d been going through before he called her.

At least that’d get Karen off his back. Jeez, she’d been texting him five times a day asking if he’d called her yet.

Anyway, it’s not like he cared if she called him back or not. He’d made the gesture. Now he could move on with his life. He might just go to the bar after work. Yeah. Get back to his normal way of doing things.

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

Billy looked over the women around him in the bar, and sighed. None of them immediately grabbed his attention. Maybe after a few drinks….

He looked them over again a couple of beers later. Still nothing. No spark. Nada. Then he realised with horror that he was looking for her. Only her. He ran his hands over his face. What the fuck was happening to him? Now he couldn’t even go out and pick up a woman at a bar? He spotted a redhead over in the corner. Would she do? He was about to head over to her to get a closer look when he felt his phone vibrate. It was a text message, not from Karen (thankfully she’d laid off him a little now) but from her.

His hand trembled a tiny bit as he opened his message app. He’d saved her contact details in his phone as Soulmate. Why had he done that? he wondered - it had been done without thinking.

“Hi Billy, really surprised to get your voicemail but yeah we can meet up. Let me know when and where. Bye.”

No emojis or anything but hey, that was fine by him. Billy wasn’t an emoji kind of guy. He realised he was smiling. He caught the redhead’s eye again and she seemed to be giving him a hopeful look, but… no. Billy drained the remainder of his beer and left the bar. He wanted to go home to think about ‘when and where’ in peace before texting her back. Tonight. He would text her back tonight. No use playing hard to get, he decided - that was just a stupid time-wasting game.

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

Billy opened his message app. He’d poured himself a whisky when he got in, and had sipped it while thinking about ‘when and where’. Now he’d decided. He was going to invite her here. To his apartment. His sanctuary. The holy of holies. He never brought women here. But he felt the need to have her here.

He was still really struggling with how she seemed to be changing what he did, how he thought. Was it the soulmate thing? He truly didn’t know. It could be. He didn’t know, but just look at tonight. He could’ve picked any of the women in that bar and he’d bet his bottom dollar they’d have taken him home or gone to a hotel with him. He hadn’t been interested in any of them. Not one. Now that was not how Billy usually rolled. So what had changed? The only variable was her.

Was it because she’d stated categorically that she wasn’t interested in him? That didn’t happen to him. Whichever women he hit on, they were always interested in Billy. So maybe it was just an ego thing. He shrugged, and began typing the text. Said how he’d like to cook dinner for her at home on Friday night, if that was okay with her. He hit Send and closed the app and his phone. Wonder what she’ll say, he thought and spent the next half an hour picking up his phone every 20 seconds to see if she’d replied. Which he knew she hadn’t of course, but he couldn’t resist checking.

He was at least able to laugh at himself. This is what teenage kids did. He’d missed out on all of that. When he was that age, he’d just bedded girls at school, too. Had never actually dated because he’d been too closed off, too self-absorbed. And too lazy to invest in actual relationships, if he was being totally honest. Why bother, when there were so many easy pickings to be had and then discarded as soon as he’d got what he wanted? Which was never very long after he’d shown interest.

His phone buzzed and he jumped, startled. He grabbed it. Yes, it was her! He opened the message app and read her acceptance of his invitation. Elated, he texted back an enthusiastic reply, saying he could pick her up. She replied, no thanks, she’d make her own way there. He smirked, still resisting him to an extent then. He sent her his address and suggested she come along at about 8 pm, asking if there was anything she didn’t eat. No, she said, she ate pretty much anything. Well, I’ll see you at 8, he texted.

He sat back, a satisfied smile on his face. Now he just had to decide what to cook.

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

She placed her cutlery on her empty plate and lifted her wine glass to her lips, taking a sip. “Well, I have to say - that was delicious, Billy.” “Glad you enjoyed it,” Billy replied casually, secretly feeling extremely pleased with himself. He’d made a monkfish and prawn curry with sticky rice. Okay, he’d bought the curry sauce but he’d had to steam the rice, par-cook the fish and seafood before uniting it with the sauce, and he’d managed not to mess it up. He didn’t tell her he’d bought the sauce, of course. He was quite happy to let her think he’d made the entire thing, and had made sure the sauce jar was at the very bottom of the kitchen bin covered with other bits of garbage so she wouldn’t inadvertently see it.

“Your apartment’s quite special too,” she went on, “did you choose the decor?” He lifted her plate along with his and took them over to the sink in the kitchen area, before bringing the bottle of rosè out of the fridge and topping up her glass. “Most of it is was in place when I moved in,” he admitted, “but I had the bedroom redone.” She laughed, “I’ll take your word for that.” He sent a flirtatious look her way, “I was ready to give you the grand tour.” She shook her head, “No need, thanks,” smiling, “you can just describe it to me.” “But it’s so much easier if I show you,” he persisted, smirking when she sighed and agreed to view it.

She picked up her wine glass and followed him out of the living area down the short corridor to his large bedroom. There was one wall of exposed brick with a large picture window, covered by a black venetian blind, two walls painted a muted metallic bronze and one statement wall of bronze and black patterned designer wallpaper. A huge king-size bed took up space in the centre of the room, with a large built-in wardrobe along one of the bronze walls and a full-length mirror set into one of its three doors. A large flat-screen TV was attached to the wall opposite the bed.

“Very masculine, I like it,” she commented. She had taken it all in from the safety of the doorway, while Billy had walked right into the room. He turned and looked back at her, “Come on in, I don’t bite.” “Don’t you? Is this where you bring all your women, Billy?” He smiled, shaking his head, “I don’t bring women here.” She looked surprised, “You don’t?” Then she nodded, “Ahh… I know, you go to their places… or maybe, a hotel?” He felt his face heat up, “Why do you assume that’s what I do?” “Because you’re a player, Billy. You hit on me in the bar that night, remember?”

He padded back over to her, until he was right up close. She gazed up into his eyes as he looked at her intensely. “D’you blame me?” he said, “I’m really attracted to you.” “Thought you said you didn’t want a soulmate?” He smiled, “I didn’t.” He let his hand stray to her cheek, laying it gently on her skin. “But maybe I’ve changed my mind.”

She went to step back from him but his hand slid round to the back of her neck and he pulled her towards him, his lips meeting hers in a long kiss. She didn’t resist so he pulled her even closer to him and let his other hand move to her waist. His kiss became more passionate and she did pull away then, starting to walk back to the living area. “I really doubt you have, Billy,” she said over her shoulder. She headed to the sofa, sitting down and regarding him as he followed her. “It’s obvious you enjoy your single lifestyle. A lot. I’m not about to get tangled up in all that.”

“So you do want a soulmate,” he smirked, sitting down side on to her and curling one long leg beneath him, “I thought you might”. She shook her head, “No. I don’t. Certainly not one who beds half of Manhattan, anyway.” He picked up his wine glass from the coffee table, smiling as he sipped some wine, “Not any more I don’t.” She gave him a sceptical look and he continued, “The night I texted you. I’ll be honest, I went to a bar to hook up… but I didn’t. I wasn’t interested in any of them.” She smirked, “So…what? You came home alone? Really?” “Really. I got your reply and I left the bar. Alone.”

She laughed, “That must’ve been disappointing for you and your ego.” He shook his head, “No, it wasn’t. I only wanted you.” Again he got a sceptical look from her, so he scooted along the sofa until he was right next to her, putting his wine glass down again. He leant in and kissed her again, before pulling back and gazing at her. “Mmmm,” he hummed, “that’s what I want.” His head tilted down again and he ran his tongue slowly along her bottom lip. “And that,” he said, mouth moving to her neck, biting and licking gently, “…and this.” She sighed, leaning her head back on the sofa.

“I’m not going to get involved with you, Billy. You’re probably just pissed that I said that, and you’re enjoying the chase. To make me submit to you. Well, it’s not going to happen.” He pressed his body against hers as much as he could, making sure his erection was right up against the side of her thigh. “Are you sure about that? I think you want this…” a small thrust of his hard length against her leg, “…as much as I want this.” Billy’s long fingers slid along her thigh until they rested right in the centre of her lap, in the haven of warmth at the apex of her thighs. She’d turned her head to look into his eyes, “I’d be a fool to get involved with you,” she repeated, “soulmate or not.”

He began to slowly stroke her inner thigh, dark eyes gazing into hers, “I’ll prove to you I’ve changed. That I do want my soulmate. You, just you and no-one else.” He saw her lips part ever so slightly, and Billy smiled.

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

Billy opened his eyes slowly, stretching and yawning. He took particular pleasure in luxuriously stretching his long legs across his king-size bed. He touched soft skin and smiled fondly as he looked over at his soulmate’s tousled head on the pillow next to him. He gave a soft chuckle, he’d mussed up her hair again when he’d made love to her during the night. She’d grumbled a little when he’d woken her up and said he wanted sex. She didn’t fool him - their appetites were exactly the same. Quite voracious, to be honest. Well, they were soulmates after all so they aligned in many, many ways.

He placed a gentle kiss on her cheek, and she shifted slightly but didn’t wake up. Lying back down, he stared up at the ceiling, deep in thought.

Who would’ve thought that Billy Russo - ‘the Panther’ as he liked to think of himself - would have fallen under his soulmate’s spell and settled down so quickly into a monogamous relationship? Without so much as a whimper? He’d not let her go home again after that first night together. He’d had to work really hard every step of the way to get her into his bed that night, but once he’d got her there and when she’d allowed him to sink into that glorious warmth of hers, he knew he’d found his paradise on earth.

He’d lain awake the rest of that night while she slept next to him, realising among other things that he’d never actually made love until that first time with her. It had always just been quick sexual releases - no feelings, just strictly physical reactions involved. He was amazed how fast his feelings for her had literally erupted in him since he’d met her, only a few days ago. Now, he couldn’t imagine being apart from her. He was scared shitless about all of this, but there wasn’t a thing he could do about it.

He’d watched her sleep for hours after that, and asked her as soon as she awoke the next morning to move in with him. She’d looked at him as if he was a crazy person. However she had in fact stayed at his place every night since, and had let her own apartment go within a month. That had been nearly six months ago.

He slipped two long slim fingers over her left hand, which lay raised above her head slightly on the pillow. The gold band on her ring finger was also slim and shone slightly in the dim light. It sat below the large pear-shaped diamond engagement ring and the eternity ring he’d given her yesterday which she also wore. His other hand stroked a lock of wavy hair back off her face, and he placed another kiss on her soft cheek.

He looked at the slightly wider band on his own ring finger. Married! Yeah, who’d have thought it. Him, Billy Russo. Playboy supreme. After only three months, too. That soulmate BS must have something to it after all, he thought, chuckling to himself. She began to stir, and his hand dropped to her shoulder, taking comfort from every physical connection he had with her.

She’d transformed him, he knew. And he’d never been happier in his life, felt more complete. He thought back to that moment he’d felt the star on his wrist burning and was eternally grateful that he’d met his soulmate.

And Karen, well… Karen had been absolutely delighted to be able to buy that hat.

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(My photo edit)

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@blackbirddaredevil23 @omgrachwrites @behindmyeyes-insidemyhead @ourloveisforthelovely @swthxrry @odetostep @supernaturalcat7 @obscurilicious @strawb3rrydr3ss @bruxa0007 @aleksanderwh0r3 @theshadowkingsqueen @bat-luna-cat @carlywhomever @paracosmenthusiast

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

#billy russo #ben barnes #billy russo x reader #billy russo fanfiction #billy russo imagine #billy russo fanfic #bbficexchange2021 #bbgiftexchange2021

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thatbritishactor · 3 years

Text

Masterlist : My fics + One Shots/Blurbs

I write for Billy Russo, Benjamin Greene, The Darkling and Ben Barnes.

Pairing: Billy Russo x Reader

Together we stand

Summary: Together We Stand explores the relationship between Billy Russo and Reader (You), over the course of twenty years. You meet as children, and you two are best friends until life tears you apart. You always find your way to each other over the years, although you witness him becoming someone you barely recognize. Billy is your weakness, the one person you cannot resist, and as he grows into a selfish, cold, manipulative man, you can’t let go of the Billy you once knew.

Warning: Mature (SMUT), 18+, language (cursing), abuse (psychological), toxic relationship dynamics.

Total words: 104,000

The * indicates steamy/ mature content

Together we stand playlist

Part 1 Part 2* Part 3 Part 4* Part 5 Part 6* Part 7* Part 8

Part 9* Part 10 Part 11* Part 12* Part 13 Part 14 Part 15

Part 16 Part 17* Part 18 Part 19 Part 20 Part 21* Part 22

Part 23 Part 24 Part 25 Part 26* Part 27 Part 28 Part 29

Part 30 Part 31 Part 32

Take me Apart [complete]

(Secret Santa Fic exchange 2021)

Summary: Your friends have been trying to set you up with Billy for a year now. Spending New Year’s Eve with him in a remote cabin might finally do the trick.

Type: Slow Burn, Mutual Pining, Idiots to lovers, “There’s Only one bed”.

Words: 14,300

Take me Apart playlist

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Pairing: Benjamin Greene x Reader

In Between Breaths

Summary : Literature College Professor Benjamin Greene moves to the US after his divorce with Julia. Heartbroken, he’s given up on the idea of love. Everything changes when he meets you.

Warnings: Cursing. This fic might contain smut in the future.

Type: The Slowest of Burns, Dark/light Academia, Professor/TA.

Total Words: 23,000

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8

Part 9

In Between Breaths Playlist

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Paring : Ben Barnes x Reader

Adventures in Success

Summary: Ben’s agent is retiring and the firm wants you to represent him. It’s going to be hard for you not to mix work with feelings.

Warning: None, language (cursing).

Total words: 36,300

Type : Slow Burn, Fluff

Adventures in Success playlist

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9

Part 10

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Pairing: The Darkling x Reader

All The Things We Hide In The Dark

A Beauty and the Beast AU fic collab written by @stardust-danvers and myself.

Summary: Chased by Drüskelle and out of options, Reader (You) seeks refuge in the remote Little Palace which is rumored to be haunted by a beast and his ghosts. But he is not the only one who hides dark secrets...

Warnings: None.

Words: 2,100

Part 1

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

One Shots/ Blurbs

The *** indicates 18+ content.

Billy Russo

Christmas Shopping (971 words)

Jealous *** (1000 words)

Stay *** (817 words)

The Darkling

Promised (1400 words)

#billy russo #billy russo x reader #ben barnes x reader #ben barnes #my fics #together we stand #adventures in success #bin bons #benjamin greene #benjamin greene x reader #in between breaths #take me apart

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shadow-assassin-blix · 3 years

Text

Never Thought This Would Happen

Soulmate AU: Combination of two different soulmate ideas. You can feel each other’s physical pains and if you write on your body, it will show up on your soulmate’s as well.

This is for the Ben Barnes Secret Santa fic exchange. @fific7 I hope you enjoy this!

Billy Russo x reader. Word count: 5137.

Warnings: Mentions of being hit by a car, some canon typical violence (neither incidents are overly detailed) and Billy talking about his past abuse. Lots of fluff, some angst, a dash of spice.

Happy Holidays!

Soulmate. The concept always made Billy scoff. He didn’t believe in it despite the fact that whatever happened to your body, whether it was an injury, or a message written on their body you could feel/see it. He very often rolled his eyes when he would see a silly message on his arm. His soulmate greatly enjoyed drawing smiley faces or sending puns. He tended to ignore it. Hell. He didn’t even think about the potential pain he put her through when he joined the marines. Nor did he think about it when he, Frank, and Curtis created Anvil together and went on dangerous missions together.

He didn’t think about… until the day he met her in the hospital.

It was supposed to be an ordinary guard job. Protect the rich schmuck from retaliation as he campaigned to be New York’s Mayor. No one suspected that someone would be so angry about his political views, that they would try and take him out. Frank wound up getting shot trying to protect him. The three of them were at the hospital, as Frank was prepped for surgery to remove the bullets and the fragments.

Most of the day he had felt a tickling sensation on his arm, as his soulmate sent message after message to him. It was starting to annoy him. He and Curtis were waiting for a doctor to tell them about Frank’s progress, when Billy felt a sudden pain randomly throughout his body. The pain was overwhelming to the point where he had to sit down; Curtis trying to help by coaching him through breathing techniques.

As that occurred, the doors to the emergency room burst open as EMTs raced in pushing a gurney with a young woman on it.

Several doctors and nurses sprung into action, asking for the details about what happened.

“Car accident. Young lady was hit trying to walk across the street. Several bones are broken, and we suspect that she has some internal bleeding. Guy ran the red light going 80mph,” One of the EMT’s explained quickly.

Billy spotted as she was pushed past several doodles and words on her arms. Billy took off his suit jacket and rolled up sleeve; his mind hoping that he was wrong. That this was just a coincidence.

He saw the words “Hey! I’m in NY right now, and wow! Everything is amazing! Is it silly that I kinda hope you live in the area?” “Trying a slice of NY style pizza for the 1st time!” with a doodle of a pizza slice next to it. He looked between his arm and hers, and he realized… with growing concern… that they matched.

She was rolled back into surgery, and he stared at the doors with a blank face.

“Hey man? Talk to me. What’s going through that brain of yours? Did you know that girl?” Curtis questioned him, trying to figure out why Billy was so freaked out.

“I… I think that was my soulmate?” Billy breathed once it finally registered.

Curtis stared at him in mild shock, “I don’t know whether to feel bad for you or laugh. The forever bachelor’s soulmate has appeared.”

Billy honestly didn’t know how to feel either. His first thought was to avoid her at all costs. He focused his attention on Frank and making sure he stayed safe.

It wasn’t until several hours later that they were informed that Frank was resting comfortably in his own room. Surgery was a success.

The nurse informed them that only one visitor at a time could see him, so while Curtis stepped inside, Billy stayed out in the hall. While he waited, he noticed that in the room next to Frank’s, was his soulmate.

‘It’s…it’s not possible right? It’s… it’s just a coincidence?’ He thought as he stepped into her room, hesitantly.

He walked over to her, his eyes roving over the many bandages that covered her body.

He pulled out a pen, and drew a random swirl on his hand, his eyes staring intently at hers. A moment passed and a swirl appeared on her hand, identical to his.

“So, it really is you?” Billy sighed, unsure of how to feel.

Billy was adamant he would never meet his soulmate, and that if he did, he would ignore them. He wasn’t one to be tied down. However, he didn’t expect that this is how they would meet. This was the first time he ever truly felt pain from his soulmate, and it was eye-opening. It made him… feel a bit guilty… for his lack of care in avoiding getting harmed.

He walked back out into the hallway trying to figure out… Figure out what? His next move? Did… did he want to get to know her? He almost felt like he had to explain himself to her. Or… did he actually want to get to know her? His thoughts felt chaotic.

Maybe… maybe if he talked to Frank? Frank who had found a second in Karen, his first soulmate being Marie. Maybe… maybe he’d know what to do?

Curtis had stepped out of Frank’s room, and was going to call Karen, to let her know what happened, so Billy figured now would be best.

Billy took a seat next to his bed, and Frank sighed heavily.

“Sometimes… I really hate our job,” Frank joked slightly.

“But… we’re good at it, right?” Billy tossed back, with a slight smirk.

Frank shook his head, before staring at him seriously, “So… Curtis mentioned something strange. Your soulmate… is here?”

“…Yeah. She’s uhh. She’s next door in fact. I… I’m not sure what to do,” Billy admitted.

“Wasn’t your original plan something along the lines of ‘pretend they don’t exist?’ You were always so sure of that response,” Frank pointed out, with a slight frown.

“..Yeah.. However, it wasn’t until today that… I realized just how much that shit hurts, when you are able to feel their pain,” Billy began scratching at his chin before trying to dismiss, “I guess part of me feels a bit guilty for the constant shit I put my body through.”

“Well… the Marines was one thing… but you do realize that she probably also felt..” Frank jerked his head toward Billy’s shoulder.

Billy froze at that realization. He never thought about the possibility that she may have felt him being attacked by that bastard when he was a kid. He touched his shoulder, trying not to think too deeply about the memories.

“…What do you think I should do?” Billy asked quietly.

“I mean… I know what I would. Go next door and introduce myself. I also know that for all the confidence you have brother, you have never been one for commitment. Whether that’s due to you trying to protect yourself or if you really think you’d be happier being the forever bachelor, I don’t know. I do know that you owe her some explanation for the hell you’ve probably put her through. Not saying you have to immediately fall in love and date her but have a conversation with her and go from there,” Frank answered with a sigh.

“When did you get so wise?” Billy joked weakly.

“Marie. She always wanted the best for you, you know? Wanted you happy and be with someone who made you feel whole,” Frank said with a chuckle.

Billy shook his head thinking about Marie and her constant fretting. Billy moved to say something else, but he heard Karen’s voice freaking out in the hallway. Billy snorted standing up and making his way back out to the hallway as Karen rushed past.

A couple of hours passed, as Curtis and Billy made several phone calls trying to put out the fires that had occurred due to the shooting. Once everything had settled the two of them took a breath, sitting down.

Curtis was talking to him about something, but Billy didn’t hear him as he noticed a doctor and nurse walk into the room that held his soulmate. His focus was zeroed in on her.

A few minutes passed before the staff walked out, and Curtis had given up trying to get Billy’s attention.

Billy wasn’t sure how but suddenly he was standing in her doorway, about to step in. He pulled out the pen he had on him, gripping it tightly as he moved further in.

The woman, his soulmate, looked up at him, confused… and slightly worried.

“Hello? May I help you?” Her voice asked him cautiously.

Billy slowly lifted the pen and wrote ‘hello’ on his hand. The woman watched him curiously, before looking down at her own hand a moment later.

She gasped lightly as she looked between the two of them.

“Umm. Hey?” He started with a wince, feeling awkward.

She stared at him for a moment, before saying, “Bummer.”

It was Billy’s turn to be confused, “Excuse me?”

“Was hoping you’d be ugly. It would at least make up for the fact that you’ve ignored me and the bullshit pain I’ve gone through because of you. But nooo. You had to be drop dead gorgeous,” She grumbled slightly, shaking her head.

Billy stared at her blankly for a moment and after he processed what she said he weakly chuckled, “Think you’re the first person to ever be disappointed by me being handsome.”

“Oh! I’m not disappointed! Please don’t take what I said too seriously! I just… I mean… never thought that this is how we would meet y’know?” She said worriedly.

“Not gonna lie. I never thought this would happen either. Are you… are you okay?” He asked her, his eyes glancing at the many bandages.

“Yeah. I’m good for now. Can’t believe it took me getting hit by a car for my soulmate to actually write back to me,” She said with a teasing smile.

“Well, not gonna lie, besides the occasional random pains in my abdomen and papercuts, you’ve lived your life pretty cautiously. So, it was kind of flooring to feel all that pain and then… see you pass by while I was waiting to hear on my friend,” Billy noted, sighing. “He had gotten shot and was in surgery when you were rolled by me.”

“Oh wow. That’s quite the double whammy. Umm. By the way… what’s your name? Cause mentally I keep calling you Handsome and I don’t want to accidentally say it aloud when we’ve only just met,” The woman reminded him.

“Billy Russo. It’s a pleasure to meet you…” Billy began.

She told him her name before saying “You can call me London though. It’s a nickname that my friends gave me.”

“Why London?” Billy asked curiously.

“I lived in England for many years. It was practically home for me. However, as a photographer, I tend to travel as much as possible. Never been one to settle down in one location,” London explained to him. “My friends chose London cause that’s where a big portion of my first portfolios were set in.”

Billy opened his mouth to say something else when his phone rang. He sighed heavily, apologizing as he answered it.

“Russo,” He stated first, listening to the person talking. “What are you talking about? The job is done. We are not going to protect someone who refused to give us all the facts about the threats against him. He can find someone else to take bullets for him. I am not putting my team at risk again.”

He hung up with a growl of annoyance.

“Hm. That… that was oddly sexy,” London mumbled to herself.

Billy ran a hand down his face, feeling exhausted.

“Sorry. Umm. Work. So… are you here in New York for work or for fun?” Billy asked trying to seem casual.

“Both. I have a couple of weddings, and other jobs lined up, especially with journalists. Was supposed to meet a journalist to talk about some company called Anvil? I don’t know,” London said with a shrug.

Billy froze then chuckled.

“What?” London asked him, head tilted trying to figure him out.

“Well. It seems that… fate was going to bring you to me no matter what. I own Anvil. My best friends, Frank Castle and Curtis Hoyle, run it with me. I… I can’t believe this,” Billy shook his head in disbelief.

“Whoa. No way. You’re the CEO of the security agency? The former marine? And whoa wait… You’re best friends with the Punisher?” London couldn’t believe what she was hearing.

“Yes to all of the above,” Billy answered with pride.

“Marine. Hmm. Well. That explains a lot,” She said somewhat quietly.

Billy moved further into her room finally, asking silently if he could sit. At her nod, he does so.

“Uh. Yeah. Sorry about that… I guess I was. Well. Am pretty cavalier with my life. Most of what you felt was from me in the marines, and I apologize for not… taking your feelings into consideration. I’m sure… those pains were pretty alarming to you?” Billy apologized to her, feeling it was necessary.

“Yeah… it’s… quite the shocker to suddenly feel like I was shot and nothing to show for it. However, I will forgive you if…” She trailed off.

“If what?” Billy asked her, trying to appear annoyed.

“If… you give me a grand tour of NY. All of the best places to go. It doesn’t have to be… a romantic date or anything. I just want to get to know you, if you are down for that?” She proposed to him.

Billy looked at her for a moment. Really looked at her. Taking in her features, and her soft smile.

“I think I can handle that. Shall we exchange numbers? You can tell me when you’re released, and I can come get you if you’d like?” Billy offered.

Her smiled brightened and Billy found himself smiling back. A part of him was chastising himself, asking ‘why would you offer that? You don’t know this woman? Even if she is your soulmate? What happened to not wanting anything to do with her?’ However, a larger part of him desperately wanted to see her smile again.

They exchanged numbers, and he left her to rest alone. He stepped out into the hallway to see Curtis smirking at him.

“How did it go Prince Charming?” Curtis asked teasingly.

“Surprisingly well. So, let’s… let’s go get some grub… or a drink or two, yeah?” Billy suggested to him.

Curtis nodded his head and the two of them were off to their usual haunt; a local bar that served burgers and fries. The two of them after ordering, sat at the bar idly chatting. About 20 minutes had passed and Curtis started chuckling at him, out of the blue.

“What? What’s so funny?” Billy questioned him.

“Appears that soulmate of yours is occupying your mind. At least 3 women have tried flirting with you and you’ve yet to notice,” Curtis said once his laughter had calmed down.

Billy blinked, looking at him in mild confusion, “Huh?”

“You got it bad man. 20 minutes in and she already got you hooked,” Curtis said with a shake of his head.

Billy had no idea how to respond to that. He just continued drinking his beer, and further distracted himself when the food came out. It was true, he was thinking about London, but he didn’t want to admit that. He was going to take this one day at time, and just go from there.

A few days later, both Frank and London were being released from the hospital. Billy waited outside with Karen who kept staring at him confused. Most likely due to the fact that he held a small teddy bear.

London was rolled out first and Billy smiled smally at her walking over to meet her.

“Hey, how are you feeling?” He asked her as he and the nurse helped her stand up.

“I’m okay. Sore. But okay. Is that for me?” She asked him, looking at the teddy bear.

“Yes. Thought about flowers but wasn’t sure if you had any allergies. Figured the bear was the safer option,” Billy somewhat mumbled, sheepishly.

She quietly told him her favorite flower, and said, “The bear is very cute though, so thank you.”

Billy cleared his throat as he handed it to her, and then walked her over to his car. Billy was so preoccupied with her that he failed to notice Frank coming out and staring at him with a growing smirk.

Karen stood next to him, looking between him and Billy, questions littering her face.

“His soulmate. Guess Curtis was right, his attention really has become centered around her,” Frank spoke lowly, watching Billy take off in his car once he got her situated.

Karen snorted, trying not to laugh.

“Poor guy. Never seen him look so nervous, which didn’t make sense until now. Think he’s ever going to actually introduce her to us?” Karen asked as she and Frank moved to her car.

“Once the whole thing fully settles in his mind. I’m sure part of him still is trying to process this. Knowing him, he might come to a point where he distances himself from her for a time. When you’re used to being disappointed a lot, you tend to expect it,” Frank answered once they were in the car.

Back with Billy, they were halfway to her apartment that she was staying at.

“So… I know you said you were in New York for work… how long are you here for?” Billy questioned breaking the silence.

“I am booked out for the next year for various events. Trying to get rid of me already?” She lightly teased him.

“No. I was just.. wondering. You said the other day that you don’t like to be tied down to one place for too long,” Billy trailed off, not sure why the thought bothered him.

“Oh. I did say that didn’t I? I mean… I can find a reason or two to stay here already. However, we have a year to figure things out. We have time to decide… whatever we want this to be,” She offered, hesitantly moving to hold his hand, hers hovering over his.

Billy nodded not looking at her as he quietly grasped her hand and held it.

She bit her lip trying to hide her smile as she watched him. She could tell he was not used to this. Granted, it had been a while since she had been in a relationship herself, and her longest relationship didn’t last more than a couple of months. Between them finding their own soulmates, and others hating that she traveled for work, dating was difficult.

He took her home, and they discussed their plans for tomorrow. They discussed going to Central Park Zoo and taking a stroll around the park. She never got to try NY style pizza the other day, so they made a plan to go get a slice or 2 for lunch.

He made sure she was settled and comfortable, before leaving her.

The next day rolled around, and the two of them began their… date? At the zoo. She brought her camera with her, taking candids/snapshots of all the animals. Unbeknownst to him, she took a few shots of him while he wasn’t paying attention. He eventually caught on, playfully glaring at her.

“Alright my little shutterbug, shall we go get pizza?” Billy asked as they reached the end.

“‘My little shutterbug?’ Don’t think anyone’s ever called me that before. But yes. Let’s goooo,” She cheered.

The two of them ate, and Billy couldn’t help but think about how adorable she was while she listened intently to him explain the proper way to eat a slice of NY style pizza. Even moreso when she was eating and making a mess of herself.

Once they finished eating, they started the walk toward her apartment due to her feeling exhausted.

“Sorry. I feel like such an old lady, but everything is starting to feel sore again,” She explained with a wince.

“Don’t be. I understand. Do you need anything before I go?” Billy inquired, as she made her way inside and he stood in her doorway.

“I’m good. You… you can come in y’know?” She pointed out as she looked back at him.

Billy slowly took a step in, feeling very much not like himself. He was usually overly confident and self-assured and would have strutted in without any uncertainties.

He looked around her apartment and saw a lot of photography equipment, and photos scattered everywhere.

“So… would you like to… stay… and watch a movie or two?” She asked him after taking some medicine.

“Depends… Are you going to make me watch chick flicks?” Billy shot back with a raised eyebrow.

“I mean… while I do have some chick flicks, I have a great deal of other genres lots of action. Basically, every Disney movie possible,” She began listing, but stopped when she saw his nose twinge. “Do… do you not like Disney?”

“Never saw one to be honest. Just know they are kid’s shit,” Billy said with a shrug.

She gasped dramatically, “Never seen any of them? Oh. Ohhh we are fixing that. This is happening. I’m not sure what kind of childhood you had but you were deprived.”

Billy didn’t say anything in response to that, just watched her run over to a shelf full of brightly colored DVDS cases.

“We shall start from the beginning. Snow White doesn’t tend to be my favorite, but she is the first Disney movie. Well. Correction, she is the first Disney Princess Movie, the first cartoon is Steamboat Willie, but I digress. I will catch you up on them all. You show me all of New York, I show you all of Disney movie franchise. These will be our goals for the next year,” She rambled slightly, as she tugged him over to her couch, after popping the DVD in the player.

Billy sat next to her, pulling his phone out of his pocket and setting it down on coffee table. He shook his head as she curled up next to him, leaning against his arm slightly. As the movie began, he moved his arm to wrap around her shoulders, pulling her in closer. He can see her smile as she scooted closer to him, head moving to lie against his shoulder.

He watched the movie with her with vague interest, not quite understanding the plot. The movie ended and he turned to her with questions getting ready to pour from his mouth.

“Listen. I know. They… they don’t get much better. But the music is good and they’re pretty to look at, so we forgive the terrible plots,” She explained to him with a laugh.

And so began their weekly tradition of watching a Disney movie (or two depending on the mood), as part of their date nights. About 2 months had passed and after a long day of training and meetings, he was ready to just collapse into his bed. When he got to his apartment, London was waiting for him, with a bag full of Chinese takeout and a case of beer.

“You’re beautiful and wonderful, have I told ya that?” He murmured to her, leaning down to kiss her, before unlocking his door.

“Long day babe?” She asked him, as she watched him leave a trail of clothes and items on his way to his bedroom.

She heard him answer somewhat muffled, as she unpacked the food and grabbed some plates and utensils. When he stepped back out he wore a simple pair of sweats and nothing else. She gazed at his torso looking at each scar she could see. She shook her head and snapped out of it before he caught her.

The two of them made their plates, and quietly ate at his table. She was about halfway through when her eyes stopped on the scar that was on his left shoulder. She tried to think back to when she felt pain from that area, thinking it was from his time in the marines.

Billy noticed her staring and said quietly, “It was from when I was a kid. You keep asking me questions about my childhood and I know you’ve noticed that I don’t ever answer them. I was abandoned as a baby, went through the foster system. I was uh… about 10… maybe 11 when it happened. When a grown man calls you pretty, you know nothing good is going to come from it. I was able to fight back but he was able to break my arm and ripped my rotator cuff in 3 places.”

She felt her heart breaking, “I remember that. I remember crying and freaking out. My parents had no clue what to do, especially when physically there was nothing wrong. I was hoping it was something like… you were being like any normal boy and like skateboarding and a trick went wrong or something. Please tell me that bastard was arrested?’

“Yeah. One of the other boys that he uhh… he attacked spoke up about it. It’s one of those things I don’t like talking about a lot, but I figured you should know since… yeah,” His sentence trailed off and he stared blankly ahead of him.

London quietly stood up, moving over to him; she tapped his arm, motioning for him to lean back. He does as she asks, looking up at her curiously. She straddled his hips, as she took a seat in his lap. She bends her head down slightly, pressing small kisses to the scar that was on his shoulder.

Billy tensed for a moment before relaxing as he realized what she was doing. He gently lifted her head back up, gazing into her eyes before capturing her lips in a soft kiss.

She gasped against his lips, before returning the kiss, and deepening it with a soft moan. The two of them had kissed before but this felt…different. Their other kisses had been short and sweet. This… this was passion and intensity.

When they pulled away, trying to catch their breathes, Billy whispered to her, “Hold onto me.”

She wrapped her arms around his neck, as his hands grasped her thighs lifting her as he stood up. He carried her over to his bed, laying her down as he crawled on top of her.

They kissed again, tugging each other’s clothes off haphazardly. He pulled back, his eyes looking to see if there was any hesitation, any doubt. Upon finding none he kissed her again, his hands exploring her body.

They spent that night learning about each other’s bodies, looking over scars, finding spots that drove each other crazy. It was in the late hours of the night when the two of them were finally spent, curling around each other as they fell into a comfortable sleep.

So comfortable in fact that Billy slept through his alarm and didn’t hear his phone going off. He did, however, hear Frank burst into his apartment shouting his name.

Billy jerked awake, reaching for his knife that he kept under his pillow, brandishing it protectively in front of him and London. She woke up to the shouts, grabbing the covers, as she rubbed the sleep from her eyes.

“Frank. I gave you that key for EMERGENCIES. Is this an emergency?” Billy asked, anger seeping into his voice as he realize it wasn’t an intruder but his best friend.

“You’re 2 hours late for work. Won’t answer your phone or texts. Forgive me for worrying that something was wrong, ye who is a stickler for being on time,” Frank explained glancing at the woman in Billy’s bed.

“Well, as you can see I’m alive. Now, can you please… go out to the living room so we can get dressed? Pretty sure my girl would feel a bit more comfortable with something other than my bedsheets covering her,” Billy prompted him with a pointed look.

Frank raised an eyebrow at that and stepped back into the living room.

Billy returned the knife to its original place, before looking over at his soulmate.

“Sorry about that, you okay?” His voice was soft and full of concern.

“Honestly, confused as hell. But yes, I’m okay. Do all of your friends do that? Or is it really that abnormal for you to sleep in?” She asked him still not fully awake.

“Not really one for sleeping in, even if I was with a girl. Apparently, you exhausted me last night,” Billy teased her with a smirk.

“Me? You were the one who was insatiable sir,” She teased back, kissing him.

“No idea what you are talking about,” He muttered against her lips, his smirk growing.

They kissed for a few minutes, before getting out of bed. She groaned softly as she stood, feeling a bit sore in between her legs.

She could practically hear his smugness as she told him to shut it.

They dressed and stepped out of the bedroom, seeing Frank leaning against the island in the kitchen.

Introductions were made, as this was the first time Frank ever officially met her. Frank left soon after, telling Billy to be there for the 2pm meeting.

Billy waves him off, and once Billy was ready for the day, he gave London a lift home before going to work.

After that night, their relationship became much more intimate. Billy did eventually introduce her to all of his friends, and she did the same. It felt strange to be in a relationship. A good kind of strange. Especially when she would still write little dumb jokes on her arms for him to see after a meeting.

Several months passed and before he knew it a year was coming up. However, he had no anxiety about it, since she had already informed him that she wasn’t leaving, not unless he came with. As the end of her lease came up, he asked her a semi-important question.

“Do you want to move in with me? We could… get a bigger place together. Maybe find a place where you can create your own darkroom instead of having to-” His sentence was cutoff by her suddenly kissing him.

When she pulled away he asked, “I take it that’s a yes?”

She nodded her head enthusiastically, kissing him again.

If someone told him a year ago that he would one day be moving into a townhouse with his soulmate, he would say they were crazy. Completely out of their minds.

Here he was though, moving into a 3-bedroom townhouse, with a beautiful woman who made him genuinely laugh and felt loved.

‘Well. That’s one tough question down. Here’s to hoping she’ll say yes to the next big question I ask her.’

#billy russo #billy russo x reader #bbficexchange2021

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goatsandgangsters · 2 years

Note

*chanting* DAR-KO-LAI! DAR-KO-LAI!

When I started shipping them: It really only took a couple months in the fandom tbh. but I also kinda realized it by accident. Anytime I tried to write them in the same fic with 0 shippy intentions, it would take an EXCEPTIONALLY flirty turn. I remember sitting here writing a fic for a different ship and being like “NIKOLAI WHY ARE YOU JOKING ABOUT MARRIAGE, THAT IS NOT THE DIRECTION I INTENDED FOR THIS SCENE??” It would legit just go there naturally without me ever intending for it. but also it COMPLETELY tracks with my usual Ship Dynamic so nobody should really be surprised

My thoughts: NARRATIVE FOILS!!!!! honestly this is THE ship for sexy people who love the grishaverse sociopolitics. Darkolai is a philosophical debate personified. I just love how they’re THE two characters who are most cognizant of Ravka politically and who are the most invested in their country As A Philosophical Concept.

I also love the well-matchedness of them. Their conversations must be the most intricate dance, such a natural back-and-forth. They throw each other off, in a way they’d both find refreshing. They’ve really found an equal in each other. (I’m going to plagiarize myself because I phrased it before:) Aleksander can’t outsmart Nikolai the way he does everyone else. Nikolai can’t dazzle Aleksander with charm the way he does everyone else. So they have to face each other as themselves, as equals.

What makes me happy about them: There’s SO much you can sink your teeth into with them! Literally endless, boundless potential. I don’t think you could ever run out of angles. There’s the politics, their shared history, the way Aleksander frankly understands Nikolai’s family better than he does, the sense of history that Aleksander brings with him (of Ravka, of the Lantsov regime). You spend hours and hours writing the two of them volleying back and forth on any given topic without either of them running out of things to say

What makes me sad about them: how hard canon works to keep them from ever having a Significant Conversation with each other, which I’m convinced is because she doesn’t want to reckon with the reality of how much Nikolai understands him. like, Rule of Wolves is a very long and often meandering book, Nikolai has the Darkling’s power literally living inside of him, they PSYCHICALLY CONNECT ON MULTIPLE OCCASIONS, not to mention their lives pre-canon were very intertwined given their respective positions which should allow for reflecting on that shared history ….. and yet there’s somehow NO room for them to have any kind of meaningful exchange with one another?? Talk about untapped potential.

Things done in fanfic that annoys me: that there’s not very many fics

Things I look for in fanfic: in this fandom particularly, because canon offers me so little of it, I really just love nuance. I like a little friction, a little tension. A little duality. Some kind of counterpoint between characters. I like fic that explores something, whether that’s an aspect of the character or an aspect of the world or a broader theme

My wishlist: Ben Barnes sneering “sobachka” on my TV screen. and at least One Scene together like those very Electrically Tense couple ones he had with Archie that came off WAY less hetero than they probably intended

Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: I have dual citizenship with Darklina (tho this man is capital T Tragic Figure, he’s not ending up with anyone in actuality). For Nikolai—ahahahaha—uhhhhh. Well. I’m very Salty about his character arc getting gutted like a fish and thrown out the window in Rule of Wolves so thaaaat influences some of my ship opinions. sooo I’m gonna endgame him with The Goddamn Ravkan Throne and getting a character arc :))

My happily ever after for them: Just run the country, JUST RUN THE COUNTRY!!! They’d be so good at it. And like, symbolically, the healing of the country as metaphor for the healing of the self. The way it brings Nikolai’s desire to reconcile with Ravka’s past failures full circle, because Aleksander IS the embodiment of the harm Ravka has inflicted on its people for centuries. (I don’t like “and then they were happy and there were no problems ever again” endings because that’s boring, but I like quietly hopeful/healing/peaceful endings—and I think they have the potential for that, symbolically. At least for a few decades before we veer back into tragedy-land, but can it truly be a tragedy when so much has changed, when it was so worth it?)

Can you imagine that sense of awe at Nikolai as king? Because Nikolai is good, Nikolai cares, Nikolai doesn’t goddamn sleep because he’s so dedicated to his country. Sometimes Aleksander tells him that he’s young still, he’s naive, but Aleksander is as much an idealist at heart. And when a bitter, jaded, wounded, burnt idealist meets Nikolai’s still-fresh idealism, how much is that hope re-awakened? How much does it re-kindle that pure, genuine belief that drove Aleksander too? After centuries fighting an uphill battle, Sisyphus shoving that boulder alone, how good does it feel that this fuuuucking family finally managed to produce someone who cares? Someone who is GOOD for Ravka? Someone who’s actually worthy to sit on the throne? What a miracle Nikolai must seem. What a long-awaited, improbable miracle.

And in return, how loved would Nikolai be for his entire life? He can’t grasp at the scope of it. I’ll live another 60 years, Saints willing—if of course you don’t leave me when I start losing my marvelous hair, and that sounds like plenty to him. But that’s not enough for Aleksander, how could it ever be enough, that’s nothing. Not even a century! He’s an intense person at the best of times, but the clock is ticking and he is not going to waste a second. The sand is already slipping between his fingers and he will hold Nikolai tight because he knows it. Nikolai knows too, but he can’t really understand. but he knows he is loved. he is loved fiercely, every day of his entire life, by someone who’s counting the seconds.

Nikolai says nothing, but he will pay him back in kind by one day leaving Aleksander with a Ravka that can finally love him in return.

#darkolai #aleksander morozova #nikolai lantsov #the darkling #grishaverse #the grisha trilogy #shadow and bone #king of scars #rule of wolves #(in case anyone has the duology blacklisted for spoiler purposes)#ullizaveta #sorry this is belated but top surgery distracted me in the meantime!#I will not be suffering fools about this fyi #be an adult and block me if you’re that pressed about a rarepair #I mean you’ll miss out on my excellent gifsets of nikolai in s2 but that’s your loss

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artemiseamoon · 3 years

Text

Who We Were

Billy Russo x f reader

A oneshot fic | Enemies to lovers to enemies to ? AU

Words: 4,156

Warnings: angst, ex-lovers, a shitty break up, billy being billy , sexual undertones

Part 2

GIF credit to creators

My SECRET SANTA fic for @fieryhuntress | part of @flightlessangelwings and @the-purity-pen Ben Barnes Fic exchange

AN: I hope you’re happy with it!

This office bought back too many memories. Your mind floods with all the times you’ve been in here; the conversations, disagreements, even the sweeter moments come back.

You and Billy never had an easy go of things. You were partly convinced that in a past life, you and Billy were enemies or something. Despite the inability to get along, you remained drawn to each other like magnets. Even the fights were thrilling. There was always an erotic undertone under every clash.

Then one day it happened. He kissed you and from then on, the rules were out the window. To this day, your fiery trist with Billy Russo was hands down the most powerful and erotic affair you ever had in your life. As much as you hated to admit it, he made every lover who came after seem subpar.

But Billy's ego and emotional unavailability, among other things, made it difficult. When the end came it was dramatic, overwhelming, painful. So much so you left Anvil to work for another company. This act itself essentially made you dead to him. Billy didn’t talk to you again, nor you to him.

You spent a year and 5 months away from him. Away from this office, this building, his scent. And now, as Anvil devoured a third security company, you stood in his office.

Anvil acquired your previous employer. As soon as you got the news, a call from an unknown number appeared on your phone. Normally, you wouldn't pick up an unknown number but at that moment, you did.

It was him. Your ghost, Billy Russo. He was brief, saying only to meet him at his office that coming Monday. You had four days to sit on it, four days of confusion, mixed feelings, anger, and a sense of joy.

You despised him for taking the company and putting you out of work, but part of you also wondered if this was just revenge for leaving Anvil. Was this Billy’s messed-up way of trying to get you back?

Either way, you weren't making excuses for Billy or his behavior. You planned to rip him a new one once you saw him. So, you make a choice, you decide to go.

That leads to today, as you stand in his office and stare at his back. Billys has been gazing out the window for what feels like forever now, each passing second only causing the emotions inside of you to intensify.

Through the tall windows, you could see the fog accumulating outside. It was one of those dreary mornings with a rainstorm on the horizon. That unclear misty sky was a good metaphor for the energy in this room right now.

You massage the back of your neck with one hand, pondering if you should have come in the first place. You decide to break the silence and speak,

“Russo, did you call me here to stare at your back all day, or are you going to tell me why I’m here?”

You barely hear the low chuckle your response arouses in him, but you can see the way his shoulders move. With his hands still in his pockets, Billy turns his head to the right, glancing back at you.

“Your old position is open if you want it.” You detect a mix of amusement in his voice. Rolling your eyes to yourself, you walk further into the room and take a seat.

“That was fucked up you know, a lot of people worked there.” You say, keeping your eyes on him.

“I’m only concerned with one. Besides, everyone received severance, you twice as much. ” He comments, before fully turning to look at you.

When those dark deep eyes meet yours, it takes everything in you to fight that hypnotic effect. Sometimes all it took was looking into his eyes, and you were mush, putty, a goner.

Billy continues, “I have another position open, ever sweeter than you last. But it would require you to work with me, closely.”

His voice drops deeper and you curse him under your breath. It still escapes your logical mind how you could hate and desire one person so much. Managing to focus your thoughts again, you reply,

“What potion? I worked here for 3 years, this sounds like bullshit Billy.”

“A lot's changed since you left, “ he stops himself. After a pause, he speaks your name. You feel your strength wavering. The way it sounded on his lips was like magic, a spell, seduction.

Billy continues, “Despite our personal shit,” he motions with his finger between his body and yours, “you’re one of the best, tops. I trust you. Things are still changing. I need someone who is almost as good as me at my side.”

His emphasis on almost rubs you the wrong way. Without thinking about it, you reach over to the table and grab a pen, then toss it at him.

Billy catches it, a grin lingers on his lips. “Your aim has always been good. My catch is better.”

Billy walks over to the table and puts the pen back. He sits on the edge and crosses his arms before making eye contact again.

Sighing heavily, you cross your arms. “We don’t even get along. How would that work? And,” you raise your voice a little higher, “my question is not to say I’m interested. So you can stop smirking.”

“Am I smirking?” Billy leans forward teasingly.

Annoyance mixes with desire inside of you, like some sort of volatile cocktail. You conclude, being in a room with Billy was a bad idea. Even after a year and 5 months, you were clearly not over him.

You stand with intent to leave, but Billy quickly reaches out and grabs your forearm. He doesn't even have to get up from the desk. You glance down at his hand firm around your arm, then at his eyes.

Billy tilts his head to the side, his eyes moving over your body. You watch with hitched breath as he greedily takes you in, down to your feet, and back up before making eye contact.

“Come work for me, you know I’ll take care of you.” Billy moistens his lips and keeps his eyes locked on yours.

Blowing out a breath, you break eye contact and look past him. A crackle of thunder fills the air, you flinch slightly, Billy stays still.

A moment passes like this, you don’t pull away or remove his hand. Billy loosens his grip and gently strokes your skin with his fingertips.

That buzzy warm feeling takes over every part of your body as your heart pounds faster. You didn’t even know what you wanted to do first, slap him in the face or climb on top of him.

When you gather the courage to make eye contact again, you instantly regret it. The fire blazing in Billy's eyes makes you breathless and you know you have to get out of this office before you sign over your soul to the devil, a second time.

Billy inches closer, moving into your space. His eyes linger on your lips a moment before rising upward again.

“I require the best, and you’re it.”

His words make your knees weak. Pulling on the last bit of strength you have, you jerk your arm away and slap him clear across the face before he knows what's happening. To be honest, you even surprise yourself.

But, you go with it, hiding your surprise, “that's for what you did and for being a dick!”

Billy touches his face, the brief sting of pain is quickly replaced by a smoldering lust-filled gaze. Billy stands up, slowly moving his hand from his face, “I like that.”

“I know you do,” you grab your bag and take a step back.

You know you should leave, you should leave right away but you can’t. The part of you choosing chaos was winning and every second that passed with Billy, you were ready to fuck up and pay the cost later.

Straightening out your posture, you speak up, “If, and this is a big if. If I come back I will have terms and I want every single one of them met. Every fucking one.” You point at him.

Billy bites his lower lip, “bossier than I remember. To be clear, that’s not a complaint.”

You feel a smile creeping on your lips but suppress it. Instead, you pull yourself toward the door. “I hate you, you know that right?”

Billy places his hand over his heart. “Without a doubt.”

“Good. I will call you with my answer when I’m ready.” You assert and grab the door handle.

Billy quickly scales the distance between you and stops right behind you, hovering at your back. He takes your hand and puts a manilla envelope inside of it, letting his fingers linger there before taking his hand away.

He smells good. Billy Russo always smelled good but right now he was intoxicating. You blink away the thought and take the packet, placing it under your arm.

As you turn the handle and open the door, Billy whispers into your ear, letting his lips brush your skin,

“As you wish.”

...

In many ways, you were a logical person, but all that went out the window with Billy. All it took was one shared glance, one smile, one gentle touch, and you were willing to ignore your brain and go with your heart.

This very fact influenced your final answer. You made Billy wait a week, enjoying every second you left him on edge. It was like foreplay between the both of you. Billy got what he wanted when he wanted it; making him sweat was perversely fulfilling.

The meeting went as expected, carefully chosen words, heavy eye contact, the two of you moving around the room like chess pieces. To your surprise, Billy agreed to all your terms. Even signed the paperwork.

(Flashback to the meeting)

You could see it, that hint of a grin at the corners of his mouth. Your eyes landed on his hair, dark as ink and perfectly slicked back. The longer you looked, you could feel that sensation in your hands, what Billy’s silky strands felt like between your fingers.

You stared so long, a memory replying in your mind, that when Billys raised his head, you didn't notice. You blinked and focused, returning to the present, his handsome face starting up at you.

“There are some questionable things in here.” He tapped the paper with the pen, not breaking eye contact. “But I’ll let you have them.”

“You let me have them or I walk.” You replied quickly. This caused Billy’s shadow to grin to morph into a full smile. It took all your will to remain calm under that gaze, that smile. But you do. “Sign it Russo, I have other things to do.”

Billy sat back in the chair while slowly spinning the pen in his fingers, “Are you this bossy in the bedroom too?”

Against all attempts not to, you laughed. Letting it out, you point to the contract, “ just sign it.”

Billy's eyes light up as he moves closer to the desk. His gaze lingers, studying you. You continued to stare down at him with an expectant look on your face. With a delighted look on his face, Billy signs.

(flashback over)

You made a promise to yourself, this time around you'd be smarter and resist your urges. No sex, no making out, no lingering touches or hands on your hips. No matter how sinfully sexy Billy Russo was, or how weak his gaze made you feel, you’d keep it together.

On your first day, you even made a point to say that your relationship would be strictly business. Nothing else. In true Billy fashion, he responded as expected. It was like voicing aloud a truth you both knew was temporary. Even in the back of your mind, you could hear that voice whisper, for now, you mean.

Shoving your urges to the deepest depth of your core, you get on with the job. You do it, and you do it well. Often catching Billy’s very proud little nods and grins as you dominated the role the way he knew you would. The flirting never really goes away, much to both of your pleasures.

…

As two weeks turn into a month, you feel proud you’ve stuck to your word, no matter how damn hard it was. Though you’ve always had chemistry, this time around it felt even more intense. Like it was trying to suck the air out of both your lungs. It reminded you of that image on the Devil tarot card. Your chemistry, your past, your longing for each other kept you bound, in chains. In response, you carefully limit your time around Billy and promptly leave after work each time.

But the most surprising thing about all of this was how little you two fought. You and Billy used to fight like cats and dogs. Even when you were messing around. The bickering reduced significantly but didn't go away.

Now, you barely fought. It was slightly disturbing how smoothly you worked together, like a well-oiled machine. And without the clashing, you enjoyed Billy's company, even craved it. You couldn’t help but wonder if maybe he changed in the last year. Perhaps, with this version of Billy you could...

You push the thought out of your mind as soon as it appears. You were you, and Billy was still Billy. Thus, a healthy relationship was likely unrealistic. No matter how much you wished it could be so.

…

2 weeks later

Your bones feel heavy, weighed down by tiredness. This most recent job was a big one. Some private concerts for big names with too much money. It required you and Billy to go upstate. You were thankful the weather cooperated for two full days, but now not so much.

You already sent the team home before the storm started, leaving only you and Billy behind to tie up loose ends. Once everything was set and done, you realize the few snowflakes hours earlier turned into a full storm.

You already checked out of your hotel rooms and planned to leave right after the meeting. Your client offered up one of their many cabins as gratitude. It was fully stocked, had gas and heat, and was close by. Driving back to the city was near impossible at this point, so you take the cabin.

On the drive up, neither you nor Billy make any conversation. It was a grueling few days and frankly, you were both exhausted. Aside from that, you did notice Billy was quieter than usual since yesterday. In your gut, it felt like he wanted to say something he wouldn’t allow himself to say. You were sure he noticed the ease between you this time around, maybe he was analyzing it too.

Billy at the wheel, he drives the car up a winding path. Snow-covered trees line the way as the headlights shine in the dark. You look forward to the cabin, the warmth. You briefly envision Billy next to you by the fire, cuddled close as he gently caresses your arm. You loved when he did that.

Your sexual connection was out of this world, but when you missed him, you often thought about the smaller things, like caresses, kisses on the side of your head, his fingers interlaced with yours.

When you arrive at the cabin, you both realize it’s more a house than a cabin. But the moment you step inside, you feel comfortable. It may have been the fanciest cabin you've ever seen in your life, but it was warm. Earth tones fill the place and a very impressive fireplace acts as the centerpiece of the living room.

You explore the place as Billy brings things in from the car. The fridge is stocked as promised, and so is the bar. In another reality, this could be a romantic getaway. But right now, as you and Billy existed in this weird untitled place, you couldn’t truly gauge the outcome of this.

The brief interlude of the storm ends as you glance out the window, you watch small flakes fall from the sky and quickly accumulate on the already snow-covered ground.

“It’s not letting up until tomorrow afternoon,” you hear Billy say from somewhere behind you. You turn around and find him in the doorway. “We might be stuck here until Wednesday.”

“Two days in the middle of the middle of the woods with Billy Russo, what a dream.” You grin.

“Smartass.” He smirks and turns, disappearing down the hall.

….

The place has three bedrooms, two and a half bathrooms, and plenty of space. It was too big really. But for a good two hours, you and Billy go your separate ways. Cleaning the day off with hot showers, getting settled in whatever bedroom you chose, exploring the place.

After a while, you return to the living room and wrap yourself in a blanket. You watch the news a little to learn about the storm and switch over to a movie. With the room nice and toasty, you had all you needed, minus a hot drink.

Almost as if on queue, Billy appears with two drinks in hand. He looks cute in his more relaxed clothes, you always loved how he looked both in and out of suits.

“Did you read my mind?”

Billy fully enters the room and places the mug on the side table next to you before sitting himself.

“You hate being cold, I remember.”

You want to kiss him. But you don’t. You wonder how often he thinks about things like this, what you like, what you don’t like. You wonder if your shared memories play in his mind like little films, as they do in yours. You thank him and take the mug into our hands. His obsidian eyes are burning into you, but you steady your own on the tv.

The truth sinks in the bottom of your stomach. You were afraid a second chance could work because you didn't want to get hurt by him again. You didn't. You could not take a second heartbreak and it was safer to hate him. But, with that hate gone, what were you supposed to do now? You no longer had the armor you needed.

Billy finally looks away and you let yourself relax a little more. Something about him was different now. He seemed more available, more open. But at the same time, not really.

You only get a few minutes into the film before Billy grabs the remote and turns it off. This catches you off guard, you turn to face him,

“Why’d you do that?” You ask.

Billys expression is serious but his eyes, his eyes are full of emotion.

“I know I hurt you when we were together. You never talk about it, you didn’t even bring it up. You just left.”

“I was fine.” You lie.

No one hurt you as bad as Billy did. Any other breakup paled in comparison. But you didn’t want to give him any more power over you than he already had, so you downplayed everything, reduced it. Even how you really felt about him.

“No, you weren’t y/n. That was my fault, my selfishness. I’ve owed you an apology for a long time now. I’m sorry.” He takes your hand from under the blanket and covers it with his own.

Emotion sweeps through your body and you stiffen up, but don’t look away.

“I take the blame, It was on me. I regret letting you leave, I regret not trying hard enough.”

Is this Billy? Or a body double? You don’t know and you can barely hold back the storm inside of you anymore. You blink quickly trying to hold the tears off a little longer.

“Are you talking or the bar?” You ask.

Billy moves closer, still holding your hand, “me. All me.”

You make an o sound and can hear the shakiness in your breath. Pulling your eyes away, you find something to look at, anything that's not Billy but you let him keep your hand.

Billy senses you pulling away and trying to suppress your emotions. Acting on instinct, he leans in and kisses you. The moment his lips meet yours your heart stops, your breath stills, you stare at him in shock.

Then the damn breaks, you exhale and kiss him back. Adrenaline rushes through your bodies as Billy pulls you closer to him, nearly in his lap, holding you as close as possible as the kiss builds.

It’s only when somehow, one of you knocks a mug over that you snap out of it. You push yourself back slightly and catch your breath.

Billy parts his lips to speak, struggling with what he’s about to say.

“ I love you, I always have.”

His confession knocks you out of the lust-filled haze of the kiss to the full reality of the moment. Billy liked you, and he got a bit obsessive about things, so you figured he might be obsessed with you. But love? Love never came up in the realm of possibilities.

Your expression must give away the chaos of your thoughts. Billy touches the side of your face, soothing your cheek with his thumb. You can see something you rarely see in his eyes, anxiety, nervousness, vulnerability.

The truth was you loved him too. You fell for him pretty damn fast but you would never tell him. You didn't want to be a statistic, one of the girls who told him and never heard it back. So it was your secret, your tightly bottled-up secret.

Feeling him watching you, you flash a quick smile that doesn't meet your eyes. Billy weaves his finger through yours. It feels good, sending a sweet warm sensation through your body.

“Um,” you start to speak, then stop. Your eyes don’t know where to settle. You pick your hands and study the way your palm fits into his. A mix of words bubble up but they don’t make sense. You don’t know where to start or how to respond.

In the tense silence, as you leave Billy handing, you notice something else mixes with the heaviness in your chest. It’s a heat, a tingling warmth that soon fills your heart and chest.

You press your lips together, trying to hold back a smile when the words escape, “I love you too.”

Before you can look him in the eyes, Billys' lips claim yours again, his hands come up to cup your face. The union of your lips sends sparks through both your bodies. This felt right. Being in his arms felt right.

When the kiss breaks, Billy doesn't release his tight grip on you. You gaze deeply into the eyes of each other, feeling desire possess your bodies and fill the air around you.

You close your eyes to calm yourself and place your hands over his.

“Billy, “ you have his full attention. You know you have to be honest. You want this, you do. But you need to protect yourself too.

You continue, “I need a little time, to think about all this, process it,” you stroke the length of his neck, “I need that.”

Billy leans into your touch, and when you slide your fingers in his hair, he melts into you. A soft moan leaves his lips. He opens his eyes to look at you with a lowered gaze,

“I owe you at least that.” His tone is soft, comforting. Any tension left in your body leaves you feeling lighter, even a little giddy.

Billy calls your name, “Come here.” He whispers.

Billy draws you into a hug. Smiling, you rest against his chest and close your eyes, listening to his breathing.

What comes next for you and Billy, you didn’t know. But you weren’t enemies anymore, you were something else and even with all the unknowns, the possibility of a future together seemed brighter than ever.

Pt 2

tags ( adding more from the form soon, if there are any, but dinner first! ) if you missed it I have a new list, likely my last cause tags take a lot of work.

Self - add taglist

Billy: @mswarriorbabe80 @rachlovesactors @readsalot73 @po3ticb3auty @b-bae-27

BILLY RUSSO

The Punisher general: @artsymaddie More Billy

#billy russo #billy russo x f reader #billy russo angst #secret Santa fic #bbgiftexchange2021 #bbficexchange2021 #Ben Barnes #ben barnes character

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oliocelottafanfics · 3 years

Text

OliOcelot’s FanFic Masterlist

Lots of fics for lots of fandoms!

Spider-Man/Marvel

Consequence of Sounds - Multichapter, Complete (34/34, 215,820 words)

Avengers as a Family, with Hydra!Peter, IronDad, and Big Brother Bucky

Plot heavy, hurt/comfort, but with enough fluff to balance it out

Starting Blind - Multichapter, Complete (4/4, 24,358 words)

Post-Endgame, Peter meets Matt Murdock

Hurt/comfort with discussions of grief and mourning, and what must come after

Art collab from the amazing @jenniboo311

Revenge is a Word I Haven't Yet Defined (I’m not sure I’m worthy of such theatrics) - Multichapter, On-Going (19/?, 95,183 words)

Jason Todd meets Spider-Man

More details in Crossovers!

Revival - Series, On-Going (6,892 words)

Some one-shots, some multichapter, world-fusion between DC and the MCU, with Jason Todd taken in by Hydra after coming back from the dead

Jason Todd/Bucky Barnes

More details in Crossovers!

Perchance to Dream - Multichapter, On-Going (4/8, 16, 896 words)

Night Circus Spideychelle AU

Spideychelle Big Bang collab with the incredible @kwoojii

On hiatus, but not abandoned

Come for the Art, Stay for the Drama - One-Shot, Complete (1/1, 3,198 words)

Identity Reveal Bingo 2021, Shooting + Impulsive Choice

Field Trip fic, but not really

Responsibility - One-Shot, Complete (1/1, 2,264 words)

Identity Reveal Bingo 2021, “Were you ever planning to tell me?”

Peter and Aunt May post-Homecoming’s missing scene

What’s in a Name - One-Shot, Complete (1/1, 6,236 words)

Spideychelle College AU, different first meeting

5 times Michelle Jones met Peter Parker at MIT (and 1 time she met Spider-Man)

Dinner is at 6 P.M. but Spider-Man is 24/7 - One-Shot, Complete (1/1, 7,865 words)

Spideychelle post-Far From Home AU, no identity reveal

Post-Endgame AU, Everybody Lives

Hurt/comfort, angst with a happy ending, May being amazing, IronDad

Last to Know - One-Shot, Complete (1/1, 3,402 words)

Follow up to Dinner is at 6 P.M, but can probably be read on its own

Pure Identity porn, with a little hurt/comfort on the side

Becoming All Alone - One Shot, Complete (1/1, 5,179 words)

Five times New York tried to help Peter Parker and the one time he finally accepted it.

Peter-centric, Outsider POV, Post-No Way Home, ambiguous but positive ending

Collab

Snap, Crackle, Pop - Two-Shot, Complete (2/2, 2,654 words)

Hurt/Comfort, 2-part prompts; Broken Bones and Sharing a Bed

Basically Peter getting beat up and Ned and MJ being there to help him heal

An Unconventional Celebration of Life - One-Shot, Complete (1/1, 3,015 words)

Peter and May go on a road trip to complete Ben’s bucket list

Pre-MCU canon

Peter Parker’s Post-Patrol Pick Me Ups - Drabble Series, On-Going

Hot Chocolate - 456 words, grief/mourning

---

Batfam/DC

Revenge is a Word I Haven't Yet Defined (I’m not sure I’m worthy of such theatrics) - Multichapter, On-Going (19/?, 95,183 words)

Jason Todd meets Spider-Man

More details in Crossovers!

Six Degrees of Separation - Series, On-Going (78,368 words)

Penelope Garcia becomes Jason Todd’s big sister via hitting him with her car

More details in Crossovers!

Two Birds on a Wire - Series, On-Going (37,811 words)

Some one-shots, some multichapter, exploring a timeline where Spencer Reid was one of the Bats

Part of CMxDC Week 2023

More details in Crossovers!

Revival - Series, On-Going (6,892 words)

Some one-shots, some multichapter, world-fusion between DC and the MCU, with Jason Todd taken in by Hydra after coming back from the dead

Jason Todd/Bucky Barnes

Originally a gift for SasheneSkywalker for the Birdwatchers Anniversary Exchange 2024, but has grown into a series beyond that!

More details in Crossovers!

If Lightning Could Strike Twice - Series, On-Going (12,280 words)

Some one-shots, some multichapter, where Spencer Reid and Barry Allen are twins

Part of CMxDC Week 2024

More details in Crossovers!

Petty Theft - One-Shot, Complete (1/1, 8,040 words)

Jason Todd returns home

Humor but with a little plot in there too

Miscalculations - Two-Shot, Complete (2/2, 4,313 words)

Hurt/Comfort, 2-part prompts; Phobia and Reading Aloud

Jason gets caught up in a job gone wrong, but Dick is a good brother and Bruce is a good dad

The Right Words - Two-Shot, Complete (2/2, 2,125 words)

Hurt/Comfort, 2-part prompts; Interrogation and “I’m so glad you’re home”

One too many reporters say the wrong thing to Jason at a party, but Dick is there to pick up the pieces

Rejigged Parallels - Multichapter, On-Going (2/?, 6,268 words)

Danny and Jazz end up in Gotham City

Ghost King Danny AU

More details in Crossovers!

Myosotis - Multichapter, Complete (4/4, 18,095 words)

Red Hood is captured by Black Mask, tortured while his family races to even realize he’s missing at all

Dark fic

Heavy on the angst, but technically Hurt/Comfort in the end

Part of the Birdwatchers One Word Prompts Year Challenge

I’m Still Here - One-Shot, Complete (1/1, 3,555 words)

A gift for itsmeyaboi_redacted1 for the Birdwatchers Anniversary Exchange 2023

Bruce overreacts to an incident on patrol with Jason. Cass is there to help, for both of them.

Hurt/Comfort

---

Criminal Minds

Grimminal Minds - Series, On-Going (120k+ words)

Spencer Reid is a Grimm

More details in Crossovers!

Six Degrees of Separation - Series, On-Going (78,368 words)

Penelope Garcia becomes Jason Todd’s big sister via hitting him with her car

More details in Crossovers!

Two Birds on a Wire - Series, On-Going (37,811 words)

Some one-shots, some multichapter, exploring a timeline where Spencer Reid was one of the Bats

Part of CMxDC Week 2023

More details in Crossovers!

If Lightning Could Strike Twice - Series, On-Going (12,280 words)

Some one-shots, some multichapter, where Spencer Reid and Barry Allen are twins

Part of CMxDC Week 2024

More details in Crossovers!

Lucky Shot - Two-Shot, Complete (2/2, 1,971 words)

Hurt/Comfort, 2-part prompts; Gunshot Wounds and “It feels nice when you hold my hand”

Spencer takes a hit while taking down an unsub. Derek is there when he wakes up.

Shoulda Woulda Coulda - Two-Shot, Complete (2/2, 2,172 words)

Hurt/Comfort, 2-part prompts; Fever and Sharing Music

Penelope goes to work sick, but Derek and Spencer manage to make sure she stays safe.

---

Danny Phantom

Rumor Mill - One-Shot, Complete (1/1, 1,776 words)

Post-series College AU, minus Phantom Planet

Danny is the campus cryptid. He just doesn’t know it yet.

Technically has a second chapter planned...maybe...

Rejigged Parallels - Multichapter, On-Going (2/?, 6,268 words)

Danny and Jazz end up in Gotham City

Ghost King Danny AU

More details in Crossovers!

---

Crossovers

Grimminal Minds - Series, On-Going

A Monster-of-the-Week style crossover series between Criminal Minds and Grimm, where Spencer Reid is a Grimm and finds out through a case that takes them all the way to Portland.

All installments are connected, separated by cases and what happens in between

Mystery, dark fantasy, semi-canon compliant to both universes

Eventual Spencer Reid/Derek Morgan, but primarily a plot-based series

Statistics and Coincidence - Multichapter Case Fic, Complete (5/5, 32,711 words)

Syllables - One-Shot, Complete (1/1, 6,285 words)

Those Who See, Those Who Are, and Those Who Know - One-Shot, Complete (1/1, 5,230 words)

Two for One - Multichapter Case Fic, Complete (7/7, 40,943 words)

Aunt Marie’s Private University - One-Shot, Complete (1/1, 15,675 words)

Of Movie Nights and Midnight Kisses - One-Shot, Complete (1/1, 2,977 words)

Carbonara - One-Shot, Complete (1/1, 3,108 words)

You Reap What You Sow - Multichapter Case Fic, On-Going (5/6, 22,634 words)

Revenge is a Word I Haven't Yet Defined (I’m not sure I’m worthy of such theatrics) - Multichapter, On-Going (19/?, 95,183 words)

Jason Todd meets Spider-Man (thanks to an annoying criminal with a dumb magic gun)

MCU, Post-Spider-Man: Homecoming

Post-All-Caste/League of Assassins Jason Todd, but before his reveal to Batman, as he has decided that he doesn’t want to be angry

Art included by me!

Six Degrees of Separation - Series, On-Going

One-shots, looking into the life of Penelope Garcia (Criminal Minds) after she crashes into the catatonic Jason Todd (DC/Batfam/Red Hood: Lost Days).

AKA, Penelope is the driver who hits Jason post-resurrection, and this changes everything, for everyone.

Also, Penelope Garcia and Barbara Gordon are hacker BFFs.

Occasionally has art by me!

Highway to Hell-OH - One-Shot, Complete (1/1, 5,865 words)

Ghosting the System (to become a part of it) - One-Shot, Complete (1/1, 4,987 words)

Penny for Your Thoughts - One-Shot, Complete (1/1, 3,000 words)

Artwork for Penny for Your Thoughts

Collecting Joy (like we collect scars) - One-Shot, Complete (1/1, 2,527 words)

Common Ground - One-Shot, Complete (1/1, 4,902 words)

Puzzle Boxes (and those who solve them) - One-Shot, Complete (1/1, 6,064 words)

The Babysitters Club - One-Shot, Complete (1/1, 4,104 words)

Puzzles and Kings (and the stories they tell) - Two-Shot, Completed (2/2, 9,385 words)

Memories Remain, Memories of Flame - One-Shot, Completed (1/1, 6,564 words)

Absence Makes the Heart (ache) - One-Shot, Complete (1/1, 1,452 words)

You Must Be New Here - One-Shot, Complete (1/1, 2,642 words)

Cold (but I think I like it this way) - One-Shot, Complete (1/1, 2,517 words)

Catch Me When I Fall - One- Shot, Complete (1/1, 2,280 words)

Friendship (and other Christmas gifts) - One-Shot, Complete (1/1, 3,505 words)

Class Of - One-Shot, Complete (1/1, 3,426 words)

Another One (flies the nest) - One-Shot, Complete (1/1, 2,625 words)

Shot in the Dark - One-Shot, Complete (1/1, 4,972 words)

Recovery (goes better with company) - One-Shot, Complete (1/1, 2,310 words)

Things That Go Bump in the Night - One-Shot, Complete (1/1, 5,177 words)

Two Birds on a Wire - Series, On-Going

Some one-shots, some multichapter, exploring a timeline where Spencer Reid was one of the Bats

Part of CMxDC Week 2023 and 2024

Breathe - One-Shot, Complete (1/1, 3,003 words)

Hack - One-Shot, Complete (1/1, 1,934 words)

Sparrow - Multichapter, Complete (6/6, 29,524 words)

Touch - One-Shot, Complete (1/1, 3,350 words)

Revival - Series, On-Going

Some one-shots, some multichapter, world-fusion between DC and the MCU, with Jason Todd taken in by Hydra after coming back from the dead

Jason Todd/Bucky Barnes

Art included by me!

To Dig a Grave in Winter - One-Shot, Complete (1/1, 6,892 words)

If Lightning Could Strike Twice - Series, On-Going

Some one-shots, some multichapter, where Spencer Reid and Barry Allen are twins

CW The Flash specific

Part of CMxDC Week 2024

Spencer Allen Reid - Multichapter, Complete (3/3, 12,280 words)

Rejigged Parallels - Multichapter, On-Going (2/?, 6,268 words)

Ghost King Danny AU

Danny and Jazz end up in Gotham City with no way home and no sign of Clockwork for help

#masterlist #fanfic #my work #OliOcelot #OliOcelot fanfic #spider man #avengers #batfam #dc #criminal minds #grimm #danny phantom #crossovers

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saynotoshityouhate · 3 years

Text

**links to my shit**

welcome to my list of links.

YOU DO NOT HAVE PERMISSION TO COPY OR TRANSLATE MY STORIES. MINORS DNI.

ao3 Link

My 2022 Year in Review

Adam Sackler

Bluebird

Chaos

Waking up with Sackler

Cute Date Idea - Pottery

NSFW Headcanon

A New Prop

Puppy Love

Sniffles

Home

Across the Alley (ADCU Fic Exchange Summer 21)

Squirt Guns & Switches (ADCU Fic Exchange Summer 21)

Whimper

5 Sentence Fic - Touch you here?

Ben Sackler (Ben Solo + Adam Sackler Hybrid)

My Turn

Kylo Ren

Full Court Press - a collaborative fic with @weareallstoriesintheend

Full Court Press - Part 1/2

Full Court Press - Part 2/2

Clyde Logan

Lakeside Picnic

Closing Time

Rubber Band Rings

Jack Gladney

Sunday Nights

Charlie Barber

Tight Spaces

Read your Audience

Free Trial Membership

The Better

101 ways to say I love you prompt

Seasons of Love (ADCU Fic Exchange Fall 21)

Commander Mills

Moonlight

Flip Zimmerman

In the Heat of the Night (A collab with @ladyinwriting18 )

Paterson

Cute Date Idea - Sunrise

Cherry Blossoms

Bruce Banner

For Science

For Science Chapter 1

For Science Chapter 2

For Science Chapter 3

For Science Chapter 4

For Science Chapter 5

One Shots

Cute Date Idea - Zoo

Lab Tease

Bruce, Reader & Baby Eden

Come Back to Us

Cupcakes

Telling Bruce You’re Expecting

Bucky Barnes

Taking Back Control

You Shook Me All Night Long

I can’t stop thinking of this man’s grumpy mug.

Aftercare with Bucky

Sparring with Bucky

Keeping you cool

Fixing the AC

BestBoyfriend!Bucky and WFH

Cute Date Idea - Karaoke

Glasses Stay On

You’re Perfect to Me

Maintenance Man

Bad Brain Day

Drabble - Be Quiet, You

Steve & Bucky

Don’t Do This

Steve Rogers

Hot Morning

NSFW Headcanon

#master list #saynotoshityouhate

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barzzal · 3 years

Text

between halls and thin walls → part four

summary: friends who fool around almost never works. almost.

↳ pairing: mathew barzal x you

↳ warnings: idiots, that’s all <3

↳ genre: fluff, angst, smut, roommates au, best friend’s best friend, friends with benefits, 18+

↳ length: series; part one, part two, part three, part four (6.7k), part five, part six

↳ masterlist: the barn

↳ track: my favorite part by mac miller, addicted by jorja smith, someone to spend time with by los retros

note: finally got myself to update this fic oml zzz quick psa tho, this will now be a six-part series! hope that’s okay and yenno as always, would love to hear what you think about this (validate me in the tags pls im lonely) happy reading babes! <3

“Yo, grandma. Haven’t you had too much tea to drink?” his voice echoes in the room as soon as he walks into it. You carefully set the cup down on the dining table and looked at him exasperatedly.

“Haven’t you had too much care to give?” you snark back, earning yourself a disappointed look from him.

“Really, y/n? That’s the best you’ve got?” he shakes his head at your appalling retort. What a shame.

You were good at pissing him off to be fair. You just weren’t in the mood to throw teases back and forth especially now that you’re feeling particularly vulnerable.

The week has been far too dreadful for you and you know that you’re willing to grovel your way into the weekend to finally have the time to slack off, not worry about taking a bath, and just go crazy with a pint of Ben & Jerry’s.

However, just like always, Mathew seems to never run out of ways to get on your nerves.

He carelessly puts his stuff on the table, causing a fairly loud thud on the surface.

You let out a deep breath, massaging your temple.

“Somebody’s cranky.” he grins. Not necessarily the kind you’d want to see from him.

You try to ignore him for a few minutes but you can’t help noticing how his build easily took over much of the space you’ve already been occupying. You irkingly look up at him, closing the book you were reading. You meet Mat’s eyes who just innocently looked back into yours. Waiting. Possibly plotting on yet another sophisticated way to toy with you.

“You’re a child.” you roll your eyes and return to your reading. He says nothing and instead rests his chin atop his enclasped hands, continuing to bother you with his ridiculously beguiling eyes. He presses his lips together before sighing dramatically.

“What?” you snap, finally shutting your book down as you look at him.

“I wanna go out.” he looks up at you in an effort to make his huge physique smaller than it really was.

“Then go out. You’re a big boy.” you breathe.

“You just said that I’m a child.” he coos, mimicking a five-year-old’s voice.

“Stop that.” you glare at him. Mat props himself back and laughs, “Come on. I’m bored.”

You open your book again just as you reply in a tone that Mat’s getting used to hearing. “Boredom doesn’t give you the right to pester me, Barzal.”

And as an exchange, he speaks in the same tone rather mockingly, “And so is that attitude, Y/L/N.”

“Come on, y/n. Let’s go out.” he now pleads, looking up at you with what seems to be his worst impression of a ‘puppy eye’.

“Fine.” you finally concede and you see Mat’s beaming smile instantly.

“Where’d you want to go?” you ask as you take your reading glasses off.

“Dunno.” He shrugs, obviously teasing.

On the edge of being irritated, you say, “Are you kidding me?”

“Grandma.” he mumbles before saying, “Do you have anything you want to do? And please don’t say book hunt.”

You suppress a smile and maintain your composure. “I’m craving for pancakes right now but I also wanna drink. Go to a bar or something.”

He nods in agreement. Already stitching his game plan.

“We can do both.” he bobs his all too fine brows.

He didn’t have a hard time getting you on board with his spontaneity. You actually haven’t gone out in a while and the thought of a possible night out doesn’t seem to be so bad of an idea.

You’ve been with Mat to parties and while the two of you don’t mingle as much as the other guys did, he does know his way around the club. The dance floor, however, he tries. He really does.

For about an hour Mathew waited patiently in the living room as he scrolled endlessly on instagram liking a few photos and laughing at posts the fans tag him occasionally. His eyes were peeled away from the screen when he heard the door to your room click. His irises trail onto your body even if he didn’t plan to originally.

Mathew, albeit dressed simply in his black turtleneck sweater and a beige overcoat exudes just about the right ‘swag’ (as per how he puts it) to stop you in your stupor. Although what you didn’t know was how you weren’t any different in his eyes. You were dressed quite nicely in a black lace bodysuit with a pair of blackpants accentuated by the black boots you usually wear on a night out. Your coat was slung on your forearm whilst you held your clutch purse in your hand so you could close the door with the other.

“What?” you blink just as you look down to eye yourself. Feeling a tad self-conscious under his gaze.

Mat immediately breaks it off. He clears his throat, pretending to wipe off the non-existent dust on the accent table.

“What?” he mirrors with an arched brow.

You shrug off his demeanor, snatching your keys from the accent table before putting it in your purse.

“Have you called a lyft already?” he nods, absentmindedly scratching his temple.

“You ready? You look— decent.” He says, trying to act casual and distant when he gives you the compliment.

Not noticing the unfamiliar look his eyes had, you return the compliment and say, “And so do you. Good job for not looking like you came straight out of an H&M catalogue.” you wink at him with a grin. A thing which was then reciprocated by a deadpan look on his end.

Before he could even come up with yet another clever way to come at you, you start walking towards the door, looking at him once as you motion the way by curling your finger.

“Haul ass, buddy.”

𖥸

10:15 PM

Mat decided to bring you to the usual place he goes to when he wants to be alone and just enjoy a couple of beers while he chats with River, the bartender he eventually befriends after years spent drinking in solitude.

The bar had a rustic feel filled with wine barrels in the corner of the room. The seats were leather (mind you, it wasn’t the kind that gets easily worn out through time) and everything looked new to you regardless of all the vintage stuff displayed articulately on the brick wall. A turntable was set on the table stacked with vinyl records, most of which were from the 70s to 80s underneath.

It was obvious that it wasn’t the kind people would know about. Aside from it being located at such a secluded street leading to the suburbs, it wasn’t the type of bar kids would want to hang out in. It only had a few customers and most of them wore suits and came with company. No one really gave a hoot when you walked in with Mathew, aka, the face of the New York Islanders. Which is basically the reason why Mat kept coming back to the place. He felt comfortable and at peace. Almost in retrospect to being at home hanging with his father.

“I can’t believe this place exists.” you say, mouthing your thanks to River as he hands you both of your drinks. The man that’s definitely aged like fine wine smiles, nodding his head over to Mat who was doing the same before he headed back to mix another set of drinks.

“Me neither.” he grins, reminiscing about the time he’s found the small pub by accident.

“This place looks expensive though.” you whisper, making Mathew laugh.

“Well, it kinda is.” he sheepishly chuckles. “River’s filthy rich.”

“Is he really?” your mouth falls and you look back over the build of the old man. The way his salt and pepper hair was neatly slicked back makes quite a compelling case for what Mat had just said.

Mat eventually explains who he was. Apparently, he was just another bored fancy man who happened to love making people drop dead and drunk with his over the top mixes. His dark deep set brown eyes are quite of a crowd favourite too. Case in point, the group of ladies seated from across you and Mathew.

“Hey.” you absentmindedly call on Mat who had just sipped on his drink. “I know what we should do.”

“All right.” he puts the glass down, “Lay it on me.”

“Let’s fix you up with one of the girls over there.” you suggest, leaning towards his body so you could get a better view upfront. Mat does not move and instead follows your finger subtly pointing at the other end of the room.

“What’s with the sudden fixation of getting me bagged tonight, huh?” he smirks, shaking his head at the idea of having to go home with some random girl. You give him a side eye as you move away from him.

“Fixation is an overstatement. We’ll be here long enough for us to get sick of each other.” you explicitly told him.

Mat eyes you intently. Searching if there was even the slightest doubt in your eyes.

Long enough to get sick of each other.

He clears his throat instead and looks across the room. “Which one?”

A gleeful cheer erupts from you just before you look over the girls in question. “What’s your type?” you ask him, not sparing a glance.

Mat looks down on you underneath the bar lights accentuating your features. Your eyes had a certain glint in them that Mat still can’t get a grasp on. Something that was just enough to spark something inside him. He didn’t want to overthink it nonetheless. It must have been just the lights.

Once Mat sensed that you were about to look at him he immediately turned his gaze forward, squinting his eyes a little pretending to check out the women you’ve been eyeing for the last minute.

“I don’t really have a type.” he shrugs, casually taking the fragile glass to his mouth.

You dismiss what he said at once, “Do I look like a child to you? Just answer it.”

Mat shakes his head, “I told you. I don’t have one. If we vibe then we vibe. Simple as that.”

You did not believe him but you decide to drop it off. Instead, you look back and return to your new found mission. Across the bar, seated were three girls busy talking to each other.

“Got it.” you tell Mat, nodding your head towards the clueless girl sitting right across from where Mathew was. “The one in the center.” you add. “The one wearing a white bodycon.”

“She’s pretty.” he nods, validating your taste as his potential wingman. “Nice smile.”

Your hand met a firm slap on the table as you went on cheering for him. “Well? Go then!” you give him a nudge, taking it back quickly when you feel a slight hesitation on his part, “Don’t tell me you need me to introduce you?”

He takes the remainder of his glass and shaked off the kick it had in his throat. “You just sit and watch, babe.”

You do as you’re told and lean towards the bar, your elbow carrying all your weight whilst you sip on your half-full martini.

Mathew’s stance and the way he carries himself immediately caused the girls to notice him coming. Of course, you weren’t really surprised. You watch him approach her,– reading along the words leaving his mouth. There was an exchange of proper ‘hello’s’ as Mat introduced himself to the girls. He reaches out his hand and the curly noirette in the center gives him a firm shake.

Mat’s eyes momentarily locked with yours just as you see their hands linger in the air— tangled long enough for him to make a quick segway. He winks your way as he sees you grin from your seat, shaking your head just after you felt the need to take a deep breath. A thing you assumed to be because of the drink. So, while Mat leads the girl to one of the empty booths and sits across from her, you call on River and ask for another drink.

Mathew must have lost track of time by the second drink he shared with Zoe. He learns that she’s from upstate and was just on the island to visit her friends. She’s still working on her major at NYU; coincidentally in the same field as Lianna so that was one of the things they’ve talked about first hand. She wasn’t really into sports so Mat steered clear of his job because he didn’t want to bore her.

“So…” Zoe smiles and tucks her hair behind her ear. “What’s the deal with you and the girl you’re with?”

By the time she asked about you, only then did Mat remember who he was originally with.

“Oh! She’s—” he looks over to where you’re seated only to find you laughing— no giggling with a man that was obviously a few years older than you. He’s wearing a neat black suit and a button down shirt with a couple of its first buttons opened. Zoe sees him frown, evidently losing his train of thought.

She calls him with her sweet voice, “Mat?”

“Yeah?” he absentmindedly answers, not wanting to take his eyes off of your hand that was now gently pushing the man’s arm whilst the two of you continue to burst into laughter.

“Are you okay?” she asks.

What’s so funny?

Finally, Mat hears Zoe’s distant voice that eventually took him back to his seat.

“Oh. Y-Yeah.” he apologetically smiles. “Sorry. What were you saying again?”

She hesitates to ask about you after taking a quick glance your way upon seeing the way Mathew looked at you. Nevertheless, she decides to go for it.

“Aren’t you two together? I don’t want to come off strong here or anything. It’s just that I don’t want to get in between something if there ever is.”

Mat looks at you one more time and as if you’ve felt his eyes all along you turn your way and meet his gaze. You shoot him a quiet smile, eyeing the guy sitting beside you, mouthing what he assumes to be an exaggerated “So hot!” on your end. He reciprocates your smile and gives you an approving nod.

Once you looked away, that’s the only time Mat finally answered the woman waiting patiently for his attention.

“What?” Mat shakes his head wildly, blowing out air off his lips defensively. “No no no. We’re just friends. She’s my roommate actually.” he shrugs you off his mind and instead tries to put his entire focus on her.

The remaining hours were spent with you and Mat getting along with your respective potential hook-ups. Not that it wasn’t the endgame either of you were hoping for at the back of your minds.

He’s got to admit that Zoe was the kind of girl he’d be interested in. Another fact he’s kept a mental tab not to mention to you because he knows you’ll just get cocky.

She was sweet and obviously eloquent. He knows she’s way smarter than he’ll ever be. But out of all those qualities, she was just as passionate at her craft as someone he likes to think he knows well enough. And that alone made a small smile creep on his lips.

Nonetheless, despite all the aforementioned, Mathew found himself a bit more reserved than he usually is whenever he gets to meet and talk to his potential ‘lady friends’ as how you’ve put it countless times. He just wasn’t his exact self. And he was beginning to question it.

There were no fancy hockey plays thrown subtly into the conversation. Neither mentions of golfing nor over the top league events. No butchered french pet names swiftly tucked in his sentences. And no endless questions that would eventually lead to something along the lines of ‘Do you want to get out of here?’

Well, not until Zoe’s friends got up their seats and she told him herself.

“Hey. The girls and I are meeting up with some friends in Brooklyn. D’ya wanna come?”

Mat’s eyes trail down to her hand now gently caressing his. He raises both his brows thinking of a possible ‘out’ because he wasn’t sure if it was a smart thing to leave you alone with a stranger.

He hums, “Sure.”

Zoe shows him a delighted smile before eventually sliding out of the booth to walk towards the bar she and her friends were formally seated.

“I gotta use the restroom first. Please excuse me.” she gives him a nod before going back to chatting with her friends.

You, on the other hand, see Mat leave the table aiming for an archway you presume to be where the loo was.

“Hey,” you call the man whose name you’ve already forgotten. Your pause was long enough for him to acknowledge the chances that you actually did forget who he was. Obviously.

“Chris.” The man in his early 30s answers with a submitting grin.

You shyly laugh, squeezing his forearm as you try to apologize for forgetting.

“Would you mind if I use the restroom?” you politely ask.

“No, not at all.” he replies and immediately stands to help you get on your feet. Gentleman.

Once you are in front of the men’s room, you anxiously wait for your wingman. You hug your purse close to your chest. Not a whole minute after, the door finally opens and you meet Mat’s irises with quite a gleeful look.

A look he wasn’t a fan of for he knew what’s about to come next.

“Are you taking off?” you eagerly ask, almost hopping on your feet.

Mat eyes you from head to toe, looking for signs that would stink from a drunk y/n. When he sees none, that’s when he decides to say that he was.

“Mkay good. I’ll be on my way too. Chris is taking me to New Jersey.” you tell him, briefly looking through the archway to see if there were people listening.

Once you know you’re clear, you lean towards Mat, your lips dangerously close to the sensitive skin of his ear. Mat feels your heated breath sending a familiar tingle up his spine. “I’ll get to ride a yacht tonight.” you bite your lower lip and giddily smile as if you were a cheeky 16 year-old usually depicted in a coming of age movie.

“Who’s Chris?” Mat, in spite of taking rounds observing you all night, finds the need to ask. “And why are you coming with him to NJ?�� he further questions.

“Uh– okay, dad.” you step back for a second. You let out a scoff, checking if he was being serious about it. “I thought we’re supposed to go get laid tonight? Weren’t you about to take off with that girl yourself?”

Mat averts your gaze and starts to scratch the corner of his brow. “Well yeah. It’s just that— he looks sketchy.” he pauses, “plus… isn’t he a little too old for you?”

You roll your eyes as you’ve already expected to hear the words from him.

“He’s 31. He’s not that old.” you say rather defensively so you turn the ball back on his court. “And what if he was? Didn’t you ask one of the moms out??”

Mat’s eyes widens and you try to bite back a laugh. He whispers with a biting tone, trying to save himself. “She didn’t look like one! I’m gonna kill Beau I swear to god.”

“Come on Barz. Don’t be such a killjoy. Text me if you need anything, okay? Wrap things up while you’re at it.” you say at once. Mat doesn’t get the chance to talk you out of such a stupid idea because before he even could, you’ve already planted a kiss on his cheek and started walking away.

Mat waited for the sound of the heavy doors of the bar, signaling that you and your friend have gone, before stepping back to where Zoe was. She waves him near the coat closet.

“Hi.” Mat greets her friends before eventually turning his attention on the unsuspecting lass. She meets her with a smile (just like what she’s been doing all night). The same smile, however, drops the second Mat opens his mouth. “Can I talk to you for a sec?”

Zoe nods and willfully abides, letting Mat take her gently by the arm.

“What’s up?” she innocently asks.

“Something came up.” he says a little too fast than what he’d originally intended. He was going to let her down either way might as well get it over with and rip up the asshole band-aid.

“Oh.” she says in a tone Mat knew that she completely understood.

“No worries.” she looks at him with a knowing look in her eyes. “I’ll see you around then.”

He gives her a kind smile and nods. “Take care.”

Mathew walks towards the bar, catching River’s teasing grin whilst he cleans up after the bottles left on the center of the counter.

“What?” Mat reacts defensively, taking a seat in front of the lone bartender. River faintly shakes his head to leave just enough curiosity in Mathew’s mind.

“You’re such a tool, old man.” the kid says aiming for the cold beer River has put away for himself. River did not mind because he’s grown fond of the star player for the past years he’s spent going on late night drinks at his bar. Years that even justifies a proper amount of time for him to know the in’s and out’s of one Mathew Barzal.

“I haven’t said a thing.” he shrugs amidst the already wide grin on his face.

There’s wisdom in his eyes that Mathew has always admired. He wasn’t the guy who’d want to talk about what’s going on inside his head but with how River’s pub seems to be just the right place, he eventually concedes and takes a shot to pick on the old man’s brain.

“Come on, spill it out. I know you’re going to anyway.” Mat gives in, running his thumb on the moist label of the bottle.

River wipes his hands before resting it atop the counter. “Well, it’s just that– I ain’t used to seeing you turn down ladies like that too often. And you’re definitely not one to stick around watching me clean up.”

Mat stays silent for a moment, as if to gather the exact reason as to why he chose to stay. He still has a long way to go before figuring that one out. He wasn’t exactly as sharp as he was on the ice.

“I don’t know, man.” he chuckles tirelessly, “I guess I wasn’t in the mood. That’s all.”

“You?” River shots a brow and dismisses him, shaking his head. When Mat doesn’t answer, he carefully picks on his choice of words and lays it down carefully for him. After all, Mathew should have known that River was old enough to not know what’s going on.

“Though I gotta be honest with you, hijo. Never imagined you’d bring someone here.” he starts.

What must have been a shot in the dark for the old man was just enough to tear Mathew’s eyes away from staring at the water beads on the bottle.

“What?”

“The girl, Barz.” he says, banging on the head of the bottle to knock the cap off. “She a friend?”

“What? Y/N?” Mat quirks his brows trailing off where River was exactly headed, “What about her?— Oh, her? Yeah, no. She’s just a friend.”

“She pretty.” he speaks in a sound accent, not wanting to let Mat know he’s growing to like catching the young lad off guard. Mathew nods casually despite the continuous blabbering. “She’s y/n. But yeah— I guess, she is pretty.”

“Then what are you doing being just friends with a pretty girl?” River inquires, taking a sip of his beer. When he sees him trying to register what he’d just said he then adds, “Why not be with her? Date her?”

“Psh. What? Date y/n? That’s crazy.” Mat shakes his head furiously, “You’re crazy.”

“What’s so crazy about that?” River takes offense, laughing at the child’s naivete.

“I can’t date her. I mean— I won’t date her.” he takes the bottle to his mouth, taking a large gulp before continuing, “We’re in this weird relationship thing. A setup, actually, and it’s— it’s crazier than dating her. I swear, you of all people won’t get it.”

“What makes you think I can’t?” he smirks, “I’ve had my fair share of crazy.” River points out despite the hesitation in Mat’s eyes. “I got all night, kid.” he adds, letting him have the floor to himself.

“You really want in on this?” he second guesses, not wanting to bore the man with his personal life.

River leans against the brass counter just below the lit rack of vintage scotch displayed on the bar. He then gestures him to give a piece of his mind and Mat finally submits to his offer.

“We’ve been in a few… prior engagements,” he starts trying to find the appropriate word. “Well, sort of.”

River hums, not necessarily getting on the same page as him so he decides to be upfront about it.

“We’ve… slept together.” he confesses.

“So you used to date her?” the old man asks.

“No.” he answers, “I told you we’re just friends.”

With furrowed brows, River takes a minute. And once Mat hears an all too familiar “Oh.” he sees him break a chuckle, shaking his head at the thought of what Mat had just told him. “You kids have way too much fun these days.”

Mathew shrugs, “Hey, I warned you. Told you you wouldn’t get it.”

“Okay, make me understand something here. You two sleep together, fool around, do all that shit.” he says, “and you swear you’re not in a relationship?”

“Nope.” Mat answers with pride, popping out the word with a hard ‘p’.

“Huh.” River clicks his tongue, “How long have you two been… engaged?”

He rolls his eyes when River uses his word, “About two months.” he answers shortly.

“Is she seeing anyone since you two started this thing? You know, casual dates, the ones I presume she’s been getting before you got her into this mess?” he asks him in a tone that only fathers would ever dare to use.

Mat thinks for a moment, trying to recall the last time he’s seen a guy pick you up for dinner besides the old man you’ve successfully bagged for the night. He firmly shakes his head no and simply says, “At least not in my recollection.”

River willfully nods, walking Mat right into the trap. “Well have you been seeing anyone lately?” he asks again, this time slipping a hint of assertion. He hears a crystal clear ‘no’ from the forward and that’s when he broke a goading grin.

“And you’re telling me you two aren’t together?” he asks yet again, getting on Mat's nerves as he continues to flood him with biting queries, building up the final point he was about to break on Mathew.

“Rivs, for the hundredth time, no. We are not.” he clarifies.

Mat watches River pour himself a glass of scotch, still wearing a smug grin. “Imma give you a piece of advice, yeah?” he smiles rather teasingly and doesn’t wait for Mat to rebut, “I’m a happily married man so I don’t know a single squat about dating nowadays, but if you’re telling me that you kids aren’t sleeping with anyone else but yourselves? Looks like a damn relationship to me.”

With his brows all quirked in confusion (and denial in the very least), Mathew gathers all his might just so he could refute whatever madness River was trying to inflict on him and screw him up in the head. But before he could even open his mouth, the sound of the heavy doors was all it took to tear up both River’s and Mat’s attention.

“Hi.” you say the moment you were welcomed by unsuspecting men talking by the bar. River acknowledges you by raising his drink, his gaze landing on Mat the moment yours did.

“Hi.” Mathew mirrors you in an attempt to drown his already racing heart. A smile impending to break loose at any moment but he manages to suppress it. Instead of dealing with his adrenaline, he gestures for you to take a seat beside him.

“Where’s the sugar daddy?” he laughs the moment you drag yourself from across the room, mocking every word he said.

“His wife called when I got into his car.” you cringe.

“Oof. Lovely.” Mat makes the distinct expression on his face just before the two of you share a laugh.

“He’s not very smooth with adultery. He needs more practice.” you casually state sarcastically, clicking your tongue.

As you find the narrative funny, you take a sip on Mathew’s beer. “How are you not drunk? You’ve been drinking way too much the entire night.”

“Well. I’ve got some things to think about—” he cuts himself off upon seeing your mouth ajar, “And no, you’re not allowed to ask because none of it concerns you.”

“I wasn’t going to.” you dismiss him, excusing yourself to River which he gladly took as his cue to leave.

When he disappeared into the kitchen, you turned your gaze on your friend wearing another one of your mischievous grins, “Hey, wanna get pancakes?”

“Y/N, it’s almost 3 AM.” Mat sighs, the tiring night starting to creep up to him.

“So?” you question, swatting his hand away when you catch him checking on his watch.

“Come on. Stop drinking that.” you insist and take the bottle from his hand before putting it over to the side.

The two of you said your goodbyes to the lone bartender who was just starting to clean up again. River gives the two of you a nod of acknowledgement before landing a knowing look on Mathew. One that he’s thankful enough not to be discerned by you.

As you walk alongside Mathew, he unconsciously places a hand on the small of your back— feeling it graze on the fabric of your coat as if to guide you towards the door in an almost romantic type of way. Perhaps, a way someone would behave if they were actually in a relationship.

Mat notices your body tense but he doesn’t move an inch. Instead, his hand travels to the curve of your waist just as he leads you through the brass doors.

Once you’re out on the streets, he lets go.

𖥸

After almost half an hour of fighting over which diner is better to eat and get sober at, you and Mat decide to just try the new diner three blocks from your apartment. Being that it was an ungodly hour, the diner was good as closed when you got in. There were a few people inside and besides the student studying alone in the corner booth, the people lounging in the vacant seats were mostly just staff. Too bad they had to work the grave shift.

Mathew, who was rather preoccupied digging in his breakfast platter, gets interrupted when you call his attention.

“So tell me,” you ask as you take a forkful of syrupy pancake into your mouth. Finally satisfying your cravings. You put the food modestly in the insides of your cheeks when you ask him a question, “What are you like on dates?”

Mat disgustingly looks at you. You easily get what such a look meant and you immediately roll your eyes. You let your hand fall in mid-air amidst still holding a fork in it to prove a point. “I’m not trying to ask you out, dumbass. Don’t be so delusional.”

He puts his silverware down and wipes his mouth with a napkin. “Why the sudden interest?”

“Just curious.” you simply say.

He hums, thinking about how he pulls off a first date. He then clears his throat as he takes you down that road. “First, I’m not bringing her to a 24/7 Diner.” you nearly gag. “She deserves a formal one just in case there won’t be a second date.” he explains.

You sit there, nodding your head every now and then as he further goes on the details of how he’s like on a date. “Of course, I’d put my best foot forward all the time. Talk about her stuff more than mine and make sure she has a good time.”

“Have you ever had a bad first date?” you curiously ask. To which he only answers with a stubborn look on his face, the one only Mat Barzal could pull off. “What? me? I don’t do bad first dates.”

“Oh, fuck off.” you flick his forehead as you laugh. The sound of his laughter echoing in your ears, drowning all the existing noise inside the lone diner.

But as the laughter dies down, Mat catches your eyes as soon as it falls on his. And just like that, there it was again, the exact same glint it had back in the bar. This time, illuminated by the pink shaded light lining up the wall accents of the diner.

When he realizes that he’s been staring for too long, he settles on turning the tables on you.

“How about you?” he props in his seat, “What are you like on dates?”

“You know, apart from the fact that you’re obviously into old men.” he snickers and you throw a curly fry on his forehead.

“Excuse me, I don’t.” you say sticking up for yourself.

Mat takes the curly fry that has fallen on his plate and proceeds to eat it. “Sure you do.”

You roll your eyes, finding it hard to suppress the fact that you might actually do. “There’s a reason why women like old men, chico.”

He leans back and answers with a level headed and quite teasing reply, “And why’s that?”

“Because they’re men.” you look at him with a jerky grin as you continue, “And men, especially of River’s kind, definitely knows how to eat his french fry.”

Mat’s mouth falls wide in disbelief, appalled that you’ve actually found a way to pick up a stone and throw it straight to his face just to rub more salt on the fact that you had to teach a 23-year-old grown man how to eat cunt.

“You’re an ass.” he says, rolling his eyes. You let out a laugh and shake your head. You were proud of yourself, sure; but showing just that is far too much for a boy’s already hurting ego. Who would have known humbling this man was such a task.

“I’m playing! You know how to now.” you tell him, “Thanks to me, of course.”

He scoffs and takes a bite off his pancakes, “Cocky.”

“But you still haven’t answered my question.” he reminds you whilst he wipes off his lips with a napkin.

“There’s not much to tell. You know I’m not high maintenance.” you tell him, ignoring the fact that you haven’t been on an actual date for so long you’re almost sure you’ve forgotten how to be in one.

“I know it’s cheesy and corny but I do think it’s still in the littlest things, you know?” you sigh. Trying to remember the last relationship (date even) you had wherein those little things, the ones that are merely the bare minimum, were actually given to you.

“You know, it’s not much, really. Maybe just a good talk without having to watch him watch me talk all night when he’s really thinking about how I’d look naked, you know what I mean?” you laugh it off, “I know, it’s stupid.”

The arrogant man sitting before you was silent for once, profusely wanting to wash the pool of melancholy he sees in your eyes. There must have been a shit ton of guys who overlooked how great of a woman you actually are just because they couldn’t stop thinking with the head in between their legs even just for a second.

Mathew knows. And he hates that he’s been ‘that’ guy at some point. Probably until now considering him thinking with his balls on was the very thing that got the two of you here in the first place.

You take a deep breath, smiling. “Anyway, that’s better than almost getting with a married man. Right?”

“Right.” Mat laughs, his gray eyes bright under all the lights as he plays with his silverware,— devoid of how much he looked like as if he was utterly and undeniably in awe of not just the energy of the woman sitting in front of him alone nor the fact that she was by far the most unbelievable woman he’s known, but most importantly, he’s yet to realize how much in deep he’s beginning to be for the woman she actually were.

Just as she is.

𖥸

You left the diner a good hour before the sunrise and what must have been a quick five minute drive if you had only taken a cab, became a twenty minute foot race between you and Mathew.

You knew that walking was a bad idea but somehow, Mat’s charm and persuasive antics had a better hold than you thought you had on your very capable cognition.

As you drag your feet into the confines of the elevator in your complex, you hear Mathew chuckling behind you with a firm hand securely placed on your waist supporting your balance.

“You know— and not just ‘cause I’m an athlete, can I just say that you’re in a very bad shape?” he says almost a whisper in your ear, his voice low and deep.

You roll your eyes, leaning on the steel cold mirror once he pulls away, “You do it in heels then tell me who’s in a bad shape.”

“Fair point.” he chuckles yet again, shying away. He presses the number for your floor before resting across from you. As Mat watches you catch your breath, he jokes in the hopes of breaking the ice between the two of you.

“So…” he clicks his tongue, playful eyes looking at you, “Wanna tap?”

Disgusted to your very core, you let out a scoff just as you shake your head. “You’re fucking sick.” you laugh upon meeting his dumb grinning face. Seconds into laughter, Mat’s silence kills off the humor. The two of you exchange glances, the smiles on your faces receding into quietude.

Mathew didn’t want to end the night letting you in the apartment not knowing what he’s been feeling the moment you’ve let him drag you out for an impromptu night out. And stupid as it was, the only thing he could think of was to slide his foot across the enclosed space embracing the two of you, nudging on your boot. You on the one hand were rather puzzled as to what caused such language. You send him a mental query by arching a brow. He lets his head fall back on the cold metal surrounding the elevator finally deciding to speak his truth.

“I’m glad we get to hang out now. You know, just like friends do.” he genuinely says.

“Me too.” you say, smiling. “I really had fun tonight. Thank you.”

As you meet his eyes, you see a glimmer of softness in his gaze.

“Good thing I got bored, eh?” he says with a smirk.

“Good thing I came back for you.” you reply.

A quiet smile parts from his lips.

“Yeah. I’m glad you did.”

It was a few seconds when you and Barzy parted from your respective walls to meet the sliding doors as it opened on your designated floor. You were pulling him closer by the tie of his coat whilst his hand was instinctively placed on your hips letting him press his body on you. Your faces were inches from each other’s, evident of not wanting to prolong the totally unplanned foreplay that’s about to go down in a communal lift.

But just like every film you’ve watched your whole life, the inevitable cliché befalls the two of you when the next words that filled the enclosed walls you’re currently caged in came from the man who has yet to miss a morning jog.

“What the hell is going on here?”

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