#ben daniels is on GOD MODE

[elrondsscribe]

Imma just say Claudia 🤝 me: SPELLBOUND

[jahayla-parker]

Hello beautiful! May I request a fic of Freddy taking care of you when you're sick?

Once you're doing up to it, ofc. 💜

Under The Weather: Freddy Carter x Reader

Description: 3.6k wc, reader is sick and Freddy goes into protective and caring boyfriend mode as he works to get her feeling better.

Warnings: mentions of being sick, fainting, hospitals, otherwise fluff

“Take 5” the co-director andy shouts, making the cast quickly scatter to maximize their break.

Y/n steps slowly to keep her balance, but each step causes a fresh wave of pain in her head.

As she makes it off the set, she nearly trips stepping down.

“‘ey love, careful” Freddy chuckles, catching her by her arm to steady her.

She blinks a few times and fakes a smile up at him, “oh, thanks”

Freddy raises an eyebrow as he catches onto the fake smile, “love?”

She forces the smile more and nods at him, wincing after from the dizziness, “yeah?”.

“Darling, you’re wincing” Freddy gasps, “what’s happening?”

Y/n grabbed his hand tightly, “I think I just tweaked something”.

Freddy frowns, “during the scene? Where does it hurt?”

“I’m okay Freddy, really” she says softly.

He stares at her questioningly, “y/n, what is-“.

“Alright, places” Andy shouts, interrupting Freddy.

Freddy sighs and squeezes her hand, silently pleading with her.

She gives him a weak smile before she excuses herself to go back to her mark.

“Is she alright?” Amita asks, appearing next to Freddy.

He hesitates but nods, “yeah. She’ll be fine”.

Y/n glances over at him, giving him another tiny smile and shoos him off with her hand.

He shakes his head but gives her a kind smile before walking back to the other stage building for his own next scene.

“Cut” Eric shouts as Kit mixes up his line.

Amita laughs loudly, smacking his arm teasingly.

“It is been not bean Kit” Danielle jokes.

“Obviously” Kit laughs.

“Freddy!” Ben yells suddenly.

Freddy looks up from his phone instantly, the panic in his stomach intensifying; Ben should be in a scene with y/n not here.

“Y/n,” he says, breathing heavy from running.

“Where?” Freddy asks, discarding his characters props on the set floor as he sprints over.

“They’re bringing her back to her trailer “ Ben informs him, turning to follow him out of the room.

“Freddy, what’s wrong?!” Amita calls out from behind them.

Freddy shakes his head, “you’ll need to do a different scene for now”.

With that, he races out of stage 3 and towards y/N’s trailer.

Ben struggles to keep up, “Freddy, slow down mate”.

“What happened?” Freddy responds, not slowing down at all.

“I don’t know” Ben admits, “one second we’re doing the scene, the next she passed out”.

Freddy skidded to a halt, turning to face ben, “she fainted?!”

Ben sighs and nods.

Freddy spins back around and speeds up his journey to her trailer.

He doesn’t bother knocking when he reaches it, instead he barrels inside instantly.

He nearly falls to his knees when he sees Archie and y/N’s manager standing next to y/n as she lies there on her trailer’s couch motionless.

“Is- is she” he breathes heavily, “is she going to be…”

“Yes Freddy, she’ll be okay” Alexia, her manager promises, a soft smile, “she just needs to sleep, she is sick and pushed herself too hard”.

Freddy nods, kneeling next to his girlfriend, her hand tightly clasped in his.

Y/N’s eyes flutter open and she tries to sit up but Freddy holds his hand on her chest softly.

“Sorry for waking you, my love. Go back to sleep” he encourages, brushing hair from her face.

She smiles tiredly at him, squeezing his hand, “What about-what about work?"

He sighs, shaking his head, “you're exhausted, honey”.

She shakes her head stubbornly, wincing as she does, prompting Freddy to give her a knowing look, one similar to that of his character.

“I’ll be fine Freddy “ she argues weakly.

He shakes his head, “no you won’t. You scared me nearly to death! My god baby, y/n, why didn’t you tell me you weren’t feeling well?!”

Y/n frowns with a guilty stare and shrugs.

Freddy sighs, “it’s alright angel. I’m sorry, I was just so worried. Don’t worry, I’ll take care of it all”.

“Freddy, you have work-“ she protests.

“You think I’m going to work right now? You fainted!” Freddy scoffed

She pouts, “but, -“

Freddy cups her face, “no. I’m taking care of you. I'm going home with you. I don't want to leave you by yourself knowing you're feeling this bad."

As she frowns at him, he sighs and kisses her forehead, “stop with that guilty look, you don’t have anything to feel guilty for. Just let me take care of this.”

“They’ve dismissed us for the day” Freddy said, putting his cellphone back down.

She nods slowly, “okay”.

Freddy squeezes her hand, “I’m going to need you to sit up Angel”.

Y/n hesitantly leans forward, Freddy steadying her with a hand to her back and chest as she moves.

“That’s it, good job, my girl” he smiles, “can you walk?”

“Yeah” she said quietly, holding his hand tightly as she pulls herself off the couch.

“Good job,” he encourages, grabbing her bag from beside her.

“We’re going to take it really slow, okay?” Freddy prompts, placing the across over his body, hooking one arm around her waist.

She complies, taking tiny steps at a glacial speed.

“You’re doing great” he promised, turning to kiss the top of her head as she looked up and sighed at the distance left.

“Woah, it’s alright” Freddy says, using his arm that was around her waist to lift her up as her legs start to give out just as they get to the car

“Lean on the car here a moment dear” he says, placing her shoulder against the back door of the car.

He opens the passenger door, guides her to the seat, and buckles her in with a tender kiss to her forehead.

“Oh hun, you’re burning up. Let’s get you home and we’ll find a way to take care of that” he frowns.

“Wait right here love, I’ll grab you some comfortable clothes” Freddy promised, setting y/n on the bed.

He quickly located their basket of clean clothes they hadn’t had the chance to put away yet, grabbing the first set of clothes he could reach.

When he made it back to their bedroom, he saw y/n had fallen asleep in her clothes, on top of the covers, shivering.

He frowned to himself and quickly walked to her, sighing as he gently woke her.

“I promise to let you sleep soon, but we should get you changed and under the covers first” he said as her eyes stared up at him.

Freddy held her up, delicately raising her shirt over her head.

Once he’d helped her remove her work clothes, he slid the new shirt he grabbed esrlier and slid it on over her head and then helped her out her arms in.

“Better?” He asked smiling at her sitting in his shirt.

She gave him a weak smile, “much”.

He let out a sigh of relief, reaching back to tie her hair more neatly so it stayed out of her face better.

“Do you want trousers?” He asked, holding up the pair he grabbed, which just so happened to be his as well.

She looked at her lap, seeing the shirt covering her thighs and shook her head.

Freddy watched as she flinched, holding her head.

He sighed, “no more shaking your head princess, just use your words please”.

“My throat hurts” she countered.

Freddy nodded, “okay… ummm.. okay, squeeze my hand once for yes and twice for no?”

The left corner of her lips curled up as she tried to give him a smile to thank him for coming up with a solution.

Y/n reached for his hand, squeezing it once.

Freddy beamed, pleased his idea would work, “good girl, I’ll make you tea”.

“Love, drink this for me please” he asked, handing her a warm cup of tea.

She began to sip on it, Freddy’s concerned eyes not leaving her as she slowly drank the hot tea with honey.

When she finished she set the cup on her nightstand, lifting her eyes to him and gave him a tiny smile, “thank you”.

He hated the way her voice cracked, but he was pleased to see she drank the full cup.

He nodded silently, leaning over to tuck her back in since she’d moved slightly to drink.

“I'm fine. It's fine. Stop-stop fussing over me” she coughed.

Freddy raised an eyebrow at her, “clearly”.

She laughed a little, causing another cough.

Freddy promptly grabbed the glass of water be brought earlier and held it out for her.

She sipped on it, rubbing her neck a bit when she finished.

As she leaned back into the pillows he stacked behind her, her eyes closed faintly.

“I am going to check the thermostat to ensure the flat stays warm and then make some soup” Freddy told her, towering over her as he felt her forehead, “before I go, may I have a kiss?"

"I'll get you sick if you kiss me” she sighed.

Freddy chuckled quietly, stroking her cheek, “That's alright darling, I'll survive. Besides, better you than anyone else”.

“You’re going to kiss someone else?” She pouted, a weak glare in her eyes.

“Of course not love, I was saying better you be the one to get me sick than someone else” he laughed, shaking his head at her illness-induced confusion.

“Why?” She asked, no longer glaring.

“Because it’ll at least be worth it” he admitted, holding her head softly.

She shut her eyes as she gave him a soft smile. Y/n reached out and grabbed his hand, giving it a soft squeeze.

Freddy grinned, delicately pressing his lips to her’s before pulling back and smoothing her stray hairs away from her skin, “get some sleep”.

“F-“ she coughed, making him turn back to her with concern in his eyes again, “Freddy, where are y-you going again?”

He gave her a sympathetic smile, “to the kitchen dear. I want to make you some soup”.

“I c-“ she coughed, glaring at nothing out of frustration, “I can help”.

Freddy hummed, smiling at her persevering determination to help others, “you want to help?”

She looked and saw she wasn’t in reach of his hand so she tapped her bed sheets once, making him giggle.

“I don’t need help with the soup, but I have another way you can help me” he told her, resting his hand on the blanket over her legs.

She tapped the bed again one time, showing him she’d nod if it didn’t hurt her to do so.

“Stay in bed and rest, for me?" He pleaded, watching as she sighed but tapped the bed one more time.

He smiled at her, “thank you darling. Call for me if you need me. Use your phone if you have to”.

She smiled weakly, tapping the sheet again before letting her heavy eyes close fully.

Freddy watched her for a moment, waiting until he saw her chest rising and falling.

“Th-“ she coughed, leaning her face into her elbow, “this is very good F-Fre-“.

He nodded quickly, squeezing her free hand as she set the bowl down, “shhh, thank you honey”.

Her eyes began to become heavy again, but she looked up at him through them anyways, giving him a small smile.

Freddy moved the bowl from the bed to the nightstand and felt her forehead.

His eyes widened and he glared at his hand, displeased with the temp.

Freddy quickly sprinted to their bathroom, grabbing a clean washcloth and holding it under the sink.

He tried to get the perfect temperature so she wouldn’t get chills but also would cool down.

However, as he heard her coughing again from the other room, he bolted back in there, the cloth in his hand.

“‘ere, try this darling” he said, placing the cloth lightly onto her forehead.

“Is this cloth too hot or cold?" Freddy asked as he adjusted it to keep it in place.

“No, it's perfect” she whispered, tugging the blanket towards her chin as she closed her eyes again.

Freddy relaxed slightly, “good”.

That night Freddy changed in their bedroom, planning on moving his discarded clothes to the hamper in the bathroom the next day as he didn’t want to leave her sight tonight.

He grabbed her phone, sliding the side button down so it would be on silent and not wake her up.

He then did the same with his, plugging it in next to his side of the bed.

Freddy slid quietly under the blankets, watching to make sure she didn’t wake up from his movements.

He sighed in relief as she kept sleeping.

However, when she began tossing and turning, with a clear shiver taking over her as well, he pulled her to his chest.

“Shhh” he soothed, grabbing the remote to turn the tv off before looking back at her, “I’m here, shhh”.

She slowly opened her eyes, staring into his worried blue ones, “you’re too close. You’ll get si-“.

He cut her off with a shake of his head and pulling her closer to him, “you won't get me sick. Well… You might, but I don't mind. Move over”.

She shuffled cautiously, making more room for both of them in the center of the bed.

Freddy smiled as she placed her head on his chest, her arms unconsciously latching onto his frame.

He knew she was right, this distance did leave him at risk for getting sick.

But as she was lying there with her head on his chest, all Freddy could think about was her soft breathing and hair minutely tickling his face.

“Ahhh ahhh, what do you think ‘er doing princess?” Freddy asked, looking up from his book he’d been reading on the couch.

Y/n shrugged, stumbling further into their flat, “I need to get stuff done”.

Freddy shook his head, setting his book down next to him.

“You need to sleep” he argued, briskly walking towards her.

“No, I’m fine” she said stubbornly.

“What is it you think you need to do?” He countered, holding her waist to stop her.

“Empty the clean laundry basket, dishes, work on my l-“ she stopped as she began coughing loudly.

“Stop. I can handle everything else, you need rest” he said firmly, his panic taking over.

She frowned but squeezed his hand once in partial agreement, “after I-“

He kissed her earlier earlobe, wincing at how warm it was, “come on, now”.

She squeezed his hands twice stubbornly before trying to walk away.

“Mmm nope” he smirked, lifting her up.

“You’re getting rest” he demanded gently, cautiously carrying her back to bed.

“I need to be productive” she groaned.

Freddy rolled his eyes, “sleep is productive”.

Freddy walked into their room, frowning when he saw she was awake and holding her head.

“Is it hurting again?” He asked rhetorically as he walked to her.

“Yeah” she whimpered.

“When did you last take some meds?" Freddy inquired, grabbing the medicine bottle from beside her bed.

He’d been out getting groceries so he wasn’t sure how long she’d been awake.

“Last time y-“ she coughed aggressively, wincing as it shook her head.

“Last time I gave you some?” Freddy clarified for her, opening the bottle.

She reached out and squeezed his hand once.

“Then you can have more, come ‘ere” he said softly, dumping the next dose of meds into his palm.

She cooperatively took the medicine and laid her head back down on the pillows.

“I also picked up this” he said, reaching into the bag he brought to their room, “it should help”.

She looked at the cough medicine bottle in his hand he showed her.

Y/n scrunched her nose and shifted away.

Freddy laughed softly, “I know it's minging, but I need you to take it anyway”.

She glared weakly at Freddy, still pouting.

“For me?” He pleaded, holding the cap full of medicine to her.

She winced as she tossed back the liquid medicine into her throat, grimacing at the taste.

“Thank you lovely” Freddy cooed, rubbing the back of her hand.

“Please” y/n whined, despite her eyes attempting to close.

Freddy sighed, “honey, you can't keep asking me to allow you to stay up."

Y/n scoffed, crossing her arms over her chest defiantly, “why?"

“‘cause you need sleep and I can't say no to that face you make and you know it" Freddy chuckled, tapping her stuffy nose.

She grinned acutely, “read to me then?”

Freddy hummed and nodded, “first we need to get you tucked in more”.

Despite her pretend state of annoyance, Freddy wrapped y/n up in a blanket until her face barely peaked out of the burrito like wrap he made.

Y/n wiggled her way down on the couch, placing herself between his legs as she rested her head on his chest.

Freddy bent his head down to kiss the space between her eyes before he picked his book up off the coffee table.

“Hope is a powerful thing. Some say it’s a different breed of magic altogether. Elusive, difficult to hold on to. But not much is needed” Freddy read quietly.

As he read to her, he grinned to himself as she drifted in and out of consciousness as if debating whether she wanted to listen to him more or sleep.

Freddy paced back and forth in the bedroom as he ran his hand through his hair in frustration, “please?”

“Come on. There's no need to overreact about this” y/n sighed.

It had been a few days now and she was overall doing better but was very lightheaded still.

“You are literally passing out” he countered, staring at her like she was insane.

“No hospital." She declared and he sighed as he saw the determined look in her eyes.

He knew she wouldn’t intentionally risk her own life just to not go in, but he was worried.

“If you even slightly lose consciousness, I'm taking you to hospital. I don’t want to hear any resistance” he compromised.

“Okay” she agreed, turning on the TV to keep her attention.

Freddy sighed, walking back to the bed so join her.

“You’re driving me insane” he muttered, holding her tightly.

“I’m okay Freddy, there’s not much they can do” she told him, rubbing his cheek.

“You should not be passing out” he complained, staring down at her, his eyes full of fear.

“The doctor said it should be over in another few days. I just over did it” she admitted.

“Yes, you did” he agreed, tightening his hold on her.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t-“ she began, frowning at him.

“Don’t apologize. Just communicate that you’re sick next time please” Freddy rebutted.

“Okay, I will. Sorry “ she agreed.

“Stop apologizing to me for this, angel, just keep your eyes open” he said, stroking her hair.

“Ahh, no, eyes open” Freddy said, tapping her cheek as her heavy eyelids began closing.

“Sorry, I'm... I'm really dizzy” she admitted weakly.

Freddy sat up more, holding her face steady between his hands, “am I taking you in now?”

Y/n hesitated, Freddy took that as a yes.

He pulled her up to the head of the bed to lean her back on the bed frame, “sit still baby”.

Freddy rushed to the bathroom, putting on his slippers and grabbing y/N’s.

“Okay,” he said breathlessly, reaching down and scooping her up in his arms, “I’ve got you”.

“I’m sorry you have to car-“ she sighed, her eyes fighting to close.

“No more apologizing, I’m glad you told me” Freddy promised, sitting her in her seat, “just let me handle this”.

After bucking my her in securely, he rushed ti the driver’s side and quickly began to drive to the nearest hospital.

Freddy sighed, relieved as the staff called y/N’s name to bring her back to be evaluated.

“I’m sorry we’re here, I know it’s late and-“ she began to ramble as Freddy pushed her in the loaner wheelchair.

"If you say ‘I'm sorry’ one more time, I'm going to be extra caring until you can't stand me” Freddy smirked, making y/n let out a breathy laugh.

“Right this way” the staff instructed, leading the couple back to the bed they wanted y/n in to be seen by a doctor.

Freddy lifted y/n out of the chair and onto the hospital stretcher.

“I’m sorry you're sick, my love. I wish there was more I could do to help” he cooed, fluffing the pillow before she laid back.

“Freddy” she pouted, grabbing his hand, “you’re doing more than enough”.

He sighed but nodded, sitting next to her, “hopefully they have something to help you”.

“I just need you “ she argued.

“Uh oh, you’re fever must be back” Freddy teased as he felt her forehead, making her laugh quietly.

“Thank you for bringing me in” she said, holding his hand.

“Thank you for dropping the stubbornness and letting me” he winked, relaxing as he knew he was now surrounded by people who would try to help her feel better.

“Let me draw you a bath” Freddy said as they entered their flat.

Y/n hummed in agreement, complying with his desires since he’d gone above and beyond to help her.

While the doctors at the hospital had already made her dizziness better, if this would make him calm, she’d let him do it.

“You're too good to me” she smiled as Freddy lead her to the bath tub that was now full and had Epsom salts in it, essential oil candles lit nearby.

“Not possible” he argued, helping her out of her clothes.

“You really didn’t have to do all of this” she smiled, holding his hand as he lead her into the tub.

“You’ll have to get used to it” he laughed.

“You plan on me being sick again soon?” She teased, relaxing her muscles in the warm water.

Freddy shook his head, his cheeks warming, “no, no. We just were talking about our future the other day and, well, ‘in sickness and health’ you know?”

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[rjhpandapaws]

Strictly Professional Feelings

Ch 2: The Type of Guy this Place Needs

There were several things that Connor hadn’t expected when he and Silas had decided to start Arkait Medical Enterprises. The biggest of course, was becoming comparable to CyberLife within their first five years. He and Silas were fresh out of university; him with his business degree, and Silas with his first of many science and engineering degrees. They hadn’t been ready for the sudden rise to the top since prosthetics was such a closed business, and it had been a struggle to keep the employees they had while filling all of the sudden positions. The turnover had been brutal. As soon as things had settled Ben, one of the heads of the business office decided to quit and now he was having to look for someone to fill the place he had left. He and Markus looked internally first to see if there was someone they could simply move up. They didn’t have any luck with that and had to look at outside applicants. Markus narrowed it down to a few candidates. It took a couple more weeks after that to decide, but they both agreed that Hank Anderson was the one. He had the necessary experience and he was a retired Police Lieutenant so he was capable of handling high stress situations. He was the best fit for an office containing one Gavin Reed.

Markus handled the interviewing process as he always did so Connor didn’t know anything more about Hank than what had been on his application So when he came to work to find Hank’s file on his desk with the note ‘The type of guy this place needs. :)’ on it he smiled. He spent the morning getting Hank’s keys activated and making sure Silas could get his computer set up today. When he called down to the lab Silas tore into him before he could even get a greeting out. Gavin had apparently broken another computer terminal. “I swear to every god Connor. I am so close to just going to Walmart or some shit and getting him a goddamn laptop.” Silas snapped, “This is the third one this quarter. He is averaging almost one a month and my department’s financial report is going to be screwed, which means Richard is going to be pissed at me. Again.” Connor sighed as three firm but polite knocks came from his office door. That had to be Hank, anyone else would have just come in. It was a nice change. he opened the door and beckoned him inside. He was on autopilot and not paying attention as he tried to appease Silas. He did not want to be dealing with this right now, he had an interview to conduct.

“Look. Silas, I will try to talk to Gavin about not drinking coffee so close to his computer; but your issue really lies more with Richard. He’s the one that brings Gavin all that coffee.” He exhaled in an attempt to let out his frustration and switch gears, “Hank is here. If it’s really bothering you this much, you can come up when the meeting is finished and we can try and figure something out.” “I’ll be up when it’s done, and I’m bringing Richard.” Silas said dryly and Connor hung up the hone as his twin muttered something else under his breath. He turned his attention toward Hank and froze. He was going to kill Markus, that note was a bad joke. Hank was exactly his type and Connor had not been prepared for that. Blonde hair that was just starting to gray, he was built like an oak tree, and rough around the edges. Connor cleared his throat and brought himself back to the moment. He was not inclined to follow that train of thought; right now at least. “Sorry about that.” Connor said as he held his hand out toward hank, “My name is Connor, it’s a pleasure to meet you Lieutenant.” “Just Hank is fine.” He responded, and nope, Connor was not ready for this at all. Not the pleasantness of his smile or the rough timbre to his voice, “My Lieutenant days are long behind me now.”

Connor forced himself back into business mode and gestured to the chair opposite his desk. Once they were both seated he dug through the files on his desk until he found Hank’s. He took the keycard and nametag out then handed them over. “Alright, Just Hank.” He groaned internally, apparently he was going to flirt poorly with this probably straight man instead of being a professional. This was fine, definitely not creepy. “These will get you into the building at any tome. They both do the same things so just carry whichever one is easier.” “Thanks.” Hank said as he tucked them away. Connor moved onto the next thing on his mental list with a nod, he was determined not to make this anymore uncomfortable for either of them. “You’re in the business office which is on the eleventh floor. You’ll be in an office rather than the bullpen so hang a left once you leave the elevator. You’ll be the last door on the right.” He looked up from the file he’d been pretending to read and met Hank’s eyes for only a moment. He didn’t want to get distracted and stare. “They should have the nameplate up on your door by tomorrow. Silas should be down to help you with your computer in a half hour at most. Any questions?” Hank was quiet for a long moment and then shook his head, “I’m good, thanks.” “Alright.” Connor said, “I’m just a call, email, or elevator ride away if you need anything.” Hank gave another nod and made his way to the door, “Thanks for your time Connor.”

“No problem Just Hank.” He smiled as Hank left and he organized his desk again while he waited for his brothers. He was daydreaming badly enough that he didn’t even hear them come in. “So that was Hank huh?” Silas remarked with a smile Connor could hear though the sudden voice had made him jump. “I’m surprised you survived.” “Keep this up Six, and I will personally buy Gavin an extra large coffee.” Connor replied as he sat back. “Okay, okay, I’m sorry.” He said and put his hands up in a pacifying gesture. “Anyway,” He shot a sharp look at Richard, “Speaking of coffee.” “He likes coffee.” Richard said defensively, “I don’t know what else to do to get him to like me.” “Talk to him.” Connor suggested despite knowing his little brother’s lack of social skills, “Or take him out for coffee on his lunch. Just please keep it away from his computer. I’m pretty sure Silas is ready to kill him.” “Only if he stops stealing my only productive intern.” Richard replied. Connor groaned, “Both of you need to settle this please. Six stop stealing Daniel when he’s on the clock; and Nines stop giving Gavin coffee while he’s working.”

He got a begrudging “Fine.” from the both of them. “Great.” Connor replied with a shooing motion, “Now get out of my office. I need to go murder Markus and figure out how I’m supposed to survive the monthly staff meetings.” His brothers only laughed. “Good luck.” Silas remarked on his way out. Connor groaned and brought his head to his desk with more force than was strictly needed. If he knocked himself out he might be able to convince himself that this was all just a dream. He was not ready to deal with this. Not to mention the luck his brothers  had with their attempts at office romance; and whatever Nines was attempting to do to Gavin; didn’t exactly put the odds in his favor. Those staff meetings were going to kill him.

[lover-of-trash-and-people]

bittersweet netflix shadow and bone finale (s1 e8) rewatch; accoutrement: white wine with ice cubes in it (no YOU'RE a mom drink shh)

my wine's like fruity I love her

light and darkness title card we love to see it

Inej looking at Alina before she goes below deck to hide <3

okay that 'what can you really do on your own' was like not fun that shit hurted

okay but Jesper's 'not enough'? <3

oh no my baby Zoya's first inkling that Darkles does not really care

omg Helnik just appeared and I remembered how much heartbreak I have to face in this episode

gods I love Danielle as Nina so so much

'this can't be it' said she with her pleading smile with downturned eyebrows MA'AM I-

don't break my dumb little heart

I might hate Calahan's little accent but they're making me tear up

oh gods I literally cannot keep a hold on myself when Dani's accent bleeds through with full force, it's like she comes more alive or smth

'I will keep you warm' SIR WHAT-

I am surprised they showed a leaning in for a kiss so soon but I'm not mad about it

her little eyebrow twitch at 'what are waffles'

when that rando said 'i hunt slavers now' a dread settled into me because I knew what was about to go down

Matthias looking somberly at the stuffed wolf's head </3

I am so incredibly entranced by this exchange between Fedyor and Nina and what it represents, it's very interesting that they pushed up their storyline to match with the timeline

damn it's kind of jarring to be back in the Fold

'REMEMBER WHO'S DRIVING'??!!!! *you better stop* meme, *i am, disgusted* meme, *oh wow, oh wow* meme

Mal you fucking idiot you could never take the crows by surprise

the music rising as Kaz starts explaining his thought process, fucking perfection

haha Mal bitchass Inej caught you

'Because if he isn't with Kirigan's crew, he's with ours' WHEN I TELL YOU I SCREAMED

'And why would we destroy the Fold? It's the greatest weapon we've got' valid point at the moment but you know I don't necessarily agree with your methods

the use of the light tunnel in the show instead of Alina just being a super flashlight in the books is quite an interesting addition as well

is this an inappropriate time to point out how pretty Ben Barnes is

okay I kind of love the depiction of the shadow powers okay sue me

'they are traitors who tried to kill you' why are you suddenly making valid points despite having kind of committed low scale genocide

'i never said I was smart' YES MAL BE THE VOICE OF HIMBOS EVERYWHERE

Kaz's face going from 'can you believe this idiot' at Mal to 'fuck me I'm gonna do the same thing aren't I' at Inej

'For who would oppose us now?' *himbo romantic rival appears out of nowhere and shoots at him* god I love this show

him standing calmly in his ridiculous all black attire after nodding at his soldier to stop the himbo in his tracks, i fucking can't

could she summon light without the Darkling making her after he put the collar on her until the uhm moment in the books? idts but in the show she can hmm

'only because I'm not in the game' you tell him Jesper

not me snickering at 'you'll be seen not as a saviour, but as a heretic' LMFAO

'Shame. I'll have to give that speech again now.' THIS SHOW IS A FUCKING COMEDY AND YOU CAN'T PROVE ME WRONG

YES LET'S FUCKING GO SULI SOLIDARITY

Darkles casually whipping the Cut out like a shuriken or a throwing knife at Jesper because he shot at him lmao I can't

INEJ FUCKING GHAFA STABBED ONE THE OLDEST AND MOST POWERFUL PEOPLE IN THAT WORLD AND THAT IS VERY TELLING OF HER POWER

that moment where you actually think that affected him despite having read the books and watched the show

and then he has to go and fucking say 'it will take more than this' and I can't be help but be a little bit impressed at this old fool's resilience

throwback to when he said 'the king is a child' sir you make some valid points sometimes and it does make it difficult to hate you

I would just like to inform everyone that it is currently 6:09 am IST and I am sipping my second mug of wine while watching netflix sab for the second time instead of doing my three papers that are due tomorrow

I'm sorry but Inej jumping to check on Zoya after she gets knocked over by the volcra? first class display of solidarity and sisterhood as well as Inej's inherent kindness

Kaz jumping in front of a FUCKING VOLCRA AND STABBING IT WITH HIS CANE to save Inej, you best believe love is true, kids

god the volcra are so ugly and gross, they did such a good job with them

they kind of remind me of these creatures (I think they might have been called Hollows or smth) from the Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children movie

STAG VISION TIME

despite my dislike for the callous nature with which the stag plotline was handled, I kind of dig the stag vision scene

'It's just me and you now, Alina. And we're all we need, anyway.' I actually feel bad for this old fool simping for this wonderful gorgeous powerful woman despite lying to her and manipulating her and exploiting her power

okay 'I never needed you' *stabs the bone fragment out of his hand* beautiful power move I fucking love you so so much

alright ben looking like ✨ that✨ not only in physical pain but also emotional pain at what the Darkling clearly considers another betrayal from this girl he wants to give the world and maybe? loves? maybe? or at least has feelings for makes my fucking heart hurt while simultaneously soar at Alina taking back control and reclaiming her power as her own and stepping into her own

'how do you claim such power' okay could have had better dialogue there writers

the fucking score lifting as she says 'you cannot claim what was not given to you' good people my heart is full

one day I'll talk about my defense of the chosen one trope because god damn I kind of love it

hmm I wonder was that brief hesitation that we saw on Alina's face due to her thinking about the 'you chose to betray our people' comment or the 'i was trying to save us' comment because that will define some of her actions in the later seasons (hopefully god if we get some, I honestly don't know what with this stupid brownface debacle)

I'm not saying talking about brownface and pointing out that it is wrong (for further context, I am actually brown) and harmful is stupid btw I'm talking about the incidents involving brownface in question

I don't wanna talk about this anymore but I might feel like I need to and end up posting about it idk

goodness Ivan actually believing in this cause makes me so sad because he too has been victimized by the system that ostracizes Grisha and he has every right to feel the way that he does

Ben actually fighting in that ridiculously heavy cloak and kefta when he's about to turn 40 this year makes me super impressed because I as a 19 year old sometimes wake up with muscle pulls after weeks of inactivity it's weird idk

also I understand that this Mal Darkling fight is completely fanservice and serves nearly no purpose to the plot in general but like I? love it?

'I don't have to kill you Darkling. Your past will do it for me' YES HIMBO GO OFF YOU TELL THAT OLD MAN GODS THAT WAS SEXY AS FUCK

maybe it's because I know Darkles will survive and will come out of it more powerful but I can't get myself to feel bad for him at the moment

Inej and Mal tearing up at Alina's condition made me almost feel something despite it being super obvious she was gonna be fine and save their asses at the last moment

HER POWER

a solitary Kaz in spotted on the western side of the newly expanded fold in his signature all black emo boy look

okay but the crows with zoya and malina is such an adorable team? I literally love them so much?

INEJ'S FUCKING SMILE AT ALINA GIVING HER THE DAGGER AND KAZ LOOKING AT HER AGSGSGSHSJSJSK MY HEART CAN'T TAKE THIS ANYMORE

SHE KNOWS JUST WHAT TO NAME IT WELL GIRLIE I KNOW IT TOO AND MY FUCKING HEART IS LITERALLY GONNA BURST

okay I know they had one interaction but Mal and Jesper would be besties in another universe

Kaz glaring at Jesper when he answers ''course not' to Alina's 'will you still be trying to kidnap me?' tell me one fucking adaptation that got the dynamics between characters this perfectly

okay why do I love that Alina kept the jewellery as maybe a small nod to she has the wits to, um, you know, I don't wanna say steal, but, um, yeah, steal it because she knew she would need money to survive on the run

oh Jessie I love you so much I wish you hadn't said those things on you ig story about the brownface

it's like every single celeb I grow attached to god's like nope that one is going to do or say something problematic (hey btw im not reassigning blame to god for stuff people have done out of their own free will, 'twas a joke)

AAAAAAAH them saying 'the deal is the deal' in the show even though they didn't have to but like they did and I love them for it

Inej literally not being able to not stare at Kaz's face and smile after this <3

'I didn't expect it to burn at all. But it can be destroyed in the end. Just like him' babe you're not wrong but like um just you wait

god Mal being on supportive boyfie mode is well, absolutely adorable, obviously, but I wish we got to see more of him as a person outside of his attachment to Alina

kaz my little demjin I wish you hadn't have had to suffer so much to meet the crows and find your calling

fastforwarding Zoya's arc is also an interesting choice to me

I wish the hug hadn't been done though, it didn't feel earned

maybe Alina awkwardly and half-heartedly (remember, at this point the alliance is fresh and they still don't entirely trust each other) reached for a hug and Zoya avoided her? and then the rest of Zoya's lines followed? that would have made more sense to me at least

I love Sujaya as well, she brought life into Zoya with whatever little screentime and scraps of writing she got

inej asking kaz 'what's your angle?' beep bop bleep morp I sense another incoming embarrassing love confession

'but we do need you' *stares at her face intensely* 'I need you' ah look at the clock, look's like it's time to screech and flap your arms like you're a volcra because you're incapable of containing your emotions

NO YOU CAN'T GO DIRECTLY FROM KANEJ PROGRESS TO HELNIK BREAKUP (TEMPORARY, MIND YOU)

helnik my loves you don't deserve this I'm so sorry for both of you

Matthias fucking smiling ruefully while he says 'this was... just a cruel joke all along' THIS IS NOT FUCKING OKAY

omg hellgate

AAAAAAAAH NINA IS ON THE SAME FRAME AS THE OG CROWS I CAN'T HANDLE THIS

CAMERA PAN FROM KAZ SAYING 'JUST HOW THIS ALL STARTED... WE'RE GONNA NEED A HEARTRENDED' TO NINA OVERHEARING HIM AND LOOKING OVER?????!!!!!! WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING THIS TO ME?!

Nina genuinely being curious as to the status of the sun saint because she obviously still cares

Also, 'But she is a Saint' okay Kaz trying to earn brownie points you have succeeded

DID THAT SAILOR JUST SAY 'GOED MORGEN FENTOMEN' TO MALINA BECAUSE I AM NOT OKAY WITH THEM JUST THROWING THAT IN MY FACE ALL OF A SUDDEN

gods I know I'll probably see them again but my heart is full of sorrow as my eyes drink in the sight of my crows for the last time for a while

I know people were annoyed at the meadow flashbacks but guess what? as a darklina, I loved them

'now that the Darkling is dead' could have phrased that a little differently my dudes that line needed to hold more weight

am I glad that they showed Darkles in this state with his nichevo'ya as a tasty little cliffhanger despite not being entirely true to the source material? maybe but only because Ben Barnes saying 'follow' and the nichevo'ya doing exactly so sent a chill down my spine

well, that's it for now, I'll have to move on I guess, get back to my real life which I'm obviously not ready to do

thank you to whoever actually read these things

I probably should have just made reactions or commentary videos instead but I'm lazy

my tumblr will probably go into inactivity once more as I emerge from my stint in the grishaverse

it was quite short (less than 2 months), considering the length of my other obsessions but it was definitely more intense than the other ones

[bionysus]

oh boy! oH BOY OH BOY OHHHH BOOOOYY!!!!!!!!!!!

idk how to add read mores on mobile i dont use tumblr a lot these days pretend theres one here and scroll past if u dont wanna see 👍👍

i mean, it was just perfect??? absolutely and 100% PERFECTION!! the cast, the acting, the costumes, the cinematography, the editing, the scripts, THE GOAT 😭👏👏👏 I'm so Fucking impressed with every single person who was apart of making this because my fucking god that was a fantastic adaption! literally my only problem is that some character development of the crows was brought forward (mainly Inej and Kaz yknow) so I'm like, well if we get up to that point later whats gonna happen? but like its not something im Worried about cause I trust itd be handled well regardless. the whole show felt just like Leigh's books, the entanglement of everyones stories and perspectives building on each other for the overall narrative.

I may add to this post when I rewatch (probably tomorrow cause my brain is gonna be a broken record on this show for a long time) but I'm just so impressed with all of the choices for the show and ig ill just bullet point the ones that are sticking with me at the end of it all rn:

David's goddamn lil hand up when he wanted to speak (POINTS TO MYSELF HI THATS ME IM THAT AWKWARD IN CONVOS) I was dubious about his actor cause i wasnt convinced but boy was I wrong! couldnt be happier to be wrong and i love him thank u Luke for this

Kit being literally The Most Perfect Person To Ever Exist And IS Jesper Holy Shit. his quips, his pistol whips and his fucking EVERYTHING. all the jokes, all the mannerisms holy shit 😭👏

the goat I mean, That Goddamn Goat! who knew Milo would be the literally crux of the whole show 😂 I need to know who was responsible for that one goat holding everything together!!!

Ben Fucking Barnes playing yet another heart throb prince and the range he pushed with all of the Darklings lines omg, that fine make me your villain will repeat in my head forever! he did such an amazing job and rereading is gonna be so much fun with his face in mind

what am I supposed to do with how fucking gorgeous Danielle is as Nina 👀 I know we hoped for someone with Nina's canonical plus-size but Danielle sure did the performance justice and I'm so happy with what we got.

i could just go thru the whole cast tbh and cry about how perfect they were cause they all were and nothing could have been better than what we got. im just so happy and impressed with everything

brain is now kinda just brrrrr i love it all mode cause im still on energy drink fumes and cant think of specifics but im sure ill be back to add on 👍

[stereogeekspodcast]

[Transcript] Season 2, Episode 4. Acting, Direction, Editing, Screenplay Nominations - Academy Awards 2021

The Academy Awards 2021 are here! Who's up for Best Acting, Best Supporting Actor, Direction, Film Editing, and Screenplay? Who do the Stereo Geeks think should win? We have so many thoughts about this year's Oscars, we can't even pick our favourites. Who do you think should win these categories?

(L-r) DANIEL KALUUYA as Chairman Fred Hampton, ASHTON SANDERS as Jimmy Palmer, ALGEE SMITH as Jake Winters, DOMINIQUE THORNE as Judy Harmon and LAKEITH STANFIELD as Bill O’Neal in Warner Bros. Pictures’ “JUDAS AND THE BLACK MESSIAH,” a Warner Bros. Pictures release.

Copyright: © 2021 Warner Bros. Entertainment Inc. All Rights Reserved

[Continuum by Audionautix plays]

Ron: Welcome to a new Stereo Geeks Special where we continue our coverage of the Oscars 2021. I'm Ron. Mon: And I'm Mon. Ron: Let's talk about the acting categories. Lead role (Male). We have Riz Ahmed for Sound of Metal. Chadwick Boseman, Ma Rainey’s Black Bottom. Anthony Hopkins for The Father. Gary Oldman, Mank. And Steven Yeun, Minari. Your pick?

Mon: Chadwick.

Ron: My pick, as well. I think this is the year for Chadwick.

Mon: Chadwick’s performance in the Ma Rainey film was compelling, outstanding. It's a real shame that he has not been here to bask in the recognition that he's got. He has swept most of the awards in this category. I'm really hoping that the Oscars don't let down his family. He deserves it.

Ron: Chadwick’s performance is a really strong point for the film. It's full of nuance, and really powerful storytelling. And I think the performance Chadwick put in was, in hindsight, made more powerful because of what we know he was actually going through. If you just look at the performance, it does really stand out. There are so many layers to his character, and that can only come out through a powerful acting performance. I feel like Chadwick could have won this category even if it wasn't a posthumous award.

Mon: I think so too. There's a lot of layers to this character, and he really gave it his all. It would have been outstanding irrespective of the year that this film came out, irrespective of the year that this performance was recognized.

Ron: I feel like it's also high time that Chadwick was recognized for his acting.

Mon: I mean, he's been good in everything that he's performed in. The fact that it has to be Ma Rainey’s Black Bottom, it has to be a posthumous recognition, that's kinda sad. But he was always good. The legacy of his acting is gonna continue for a long time.

Ron: Absolutely. Talking about the other performances in this category, there are some hits and misses.

Mon: Yeah. I feel like with Gary Oldman in Mank, it’s probably one that we all expected. It's probably also the least exciting.

Ron: I felt like when I was watching Mank, I was watching Gary Oldman play a different version of his Winston Churchill.

Mon: Right? I felt the same way!

Ron: Okay, so it wasn't just me.

Mon: No, it wasn't, man. That was surprising to me because I feel like Gary Oldman is the kind of person who, when he plays a character, he really adds in so many different layers to it, gives each one a unique take, and this one just felt like, copy-paste.

Ron: Yeah, totally.

Mon: I don't think it helps that Mank, in general, is an underwhelming experience. And with the role, as well, I feel like we’ve seen, not only Gary Oldman do it before, but we've seen this kind of role before. The only thing I'll say is that it's not very obviously Oscar-baity, but it's exactly the kind that the Academy likes.

Ron: I actually think this is very obviously Oscar-baity.

Mon: Oh okay.

Ron: Yeah, totally. This is the exact kind of role that the Oscars love. This difficult man who is larger than life, who inspires and cuts down at the same time, that's exactly what the Oscars love. And that's why I actually hated Mank.

Mon: Yeah.

Ron: Because we have seen this character for aeons, there's nothing new here.

Mon: Yeah, absolutely, it's just change the setting, change the saturation point.

Ron: Absolutely. I would happily have swapped out Gary Oldman for Kingsley Ben-Adir in One Night in Miami.

Mon: That one still hurts me.

Ron: I just don't understand how he’s not in this list.

Mon: He's not in this list at all! That's what annoys me.

Ron: One Night in Miami has not got the noms that it deserves. And it's just driving me crazy.

Mon: The other performance which is definitely Oscar-baity is Anthony Hopkins in The Father.

Ron: Same problem that I had with Gary Oldman. Even in the huge, long career that Anthony Hopkins has had, this is not a good performance!

Mon: Right. There was only one scene where I felt like he'd kind of gone outside his comfort zone. There's this scene where he's meeting his caretaker for the first time, and he's sort of trying to impress her, and there's this natural vivacity that he brings, which I don't think I've seen in Anthony Hopkins, ever. And I love that.

Ron: Yes. Mon: And then it's completely ruined by that last scene. The acting in the last scene is so Oscar-baity. It is so ‘I am doing this so that I can definitely take home the little gold statue’. And it was the one scene that I hated so much because it was so put-on, it was so artificial.

Ron: But I felt like that about the whole movie. I felt, when I was watching this movie, that I was watching Anthony Hopkins.

Mon: Yeah, no, I agree with you on that. I agree with you, completely. And that's a problem because it didn't feel like a performance because it felt like he wasn't doing anything different. And I'm really disappointed because we know this guy can be better.

Ron: This is Anthony Hopkins.

Mon: I know! He puts in his all in a Marvel film. That's how good this guy is, and this film just feels like it's trying too hard and not reaching.

Ron: The play that The Father is based on, the performance was done by Frank Langella. And when I watched this, I was like, oh my god, Frank Langella would have been amazing in this.

Mon: That is so funny considering which role Frank Langella actually did play in the movies that have been nominated in this Academy Awards. Honestly, you could have put in a lot of veteran, white, old actors from Hollywood, they would have played that role the exact same way. Which is why I don't think it deserves a nomination or an award.

Ron: Yeah, agreed. Steven Yeun, Minari.

Mon: I think this was a surprise because a lot of people hadn't seen this film, And he's really known for being in The Walking Dead. You don't expect him to be nominated for the Oscars, but here he is.

Ron: It's such an understated performance. Like throughout the movie I could see myself in him. Which is why I'm really glad that he's got nominated because his Jacob is us.

Mon: Yeah, he's this foolhardy, obstinate kind of guy, but he's just so wistful, and I think I really like that because he's trying so hard, and he really believes in himself and in his dream. And you get all of that in Steven Yeun, just the way he carries himself, just the small little expressions that he makes. He doesn't even have to talk much, it's just him.

Ron: What I really loved about Steven Yeun’s performance was the scene where he is being a ‘dad’. And you know dads, they will be themselves, and then suddenly they will go into dad-mode. Where they’re like, you know what, something has happened and I need to be a ‘dad’ right now. And he is so, so good in that scene. And I was like, oh my god, stop being such a ‘dad’!

Mon: Exactly! Because the dad is putting on the performance of being a ‘dad’, and Steven Yeun is doing an excellent job of being that dad who's trying to be a ‘dad’. It's too good.

Ron: And that's why I'm really happy that he's been nominated because this is what acting is supposed to be.

Mon: It's supposed to be understated but also feel real.

Ron: In any other year, he would have been the top favorite in this category.

Mon: Yeah, I think so too.

Ron: It's just a really good performance.

Mon: Right. And to round it all off is Riz Ahmed from Sound of Metal. This is another very understated performance. There's nothing huge and flashy. It’s really just somebody who is coping with the circumstance that he cannot envisage. And he's really struggling, because his whole life, literally, his whole life, is going to change. It's really hard to rate this performance because it's so natural. It's so effortless. If you haven't seen Riz Ahmed in other stuff, you would think this is just him being him, but there are, of course, like differences to who he probably is as a person.

But I think the recognition of this award really goes to the fact that he put in so much work to make this role look as effortless as it does. He learned how to play the drums, he learned ASL, and both of those, he just does it so naturally in the film. And the performance would have been completely derailed had he not put in that effort of all those months, it would not have been a good performance.

Like when he’s drumming, like the first scene is him drumming, and you can see that it's him. It's not like in the shadows, it's not from the back, it's not like a stunt double. Nope, it's him. And you wouldn't connect with this character if you didn't see him front and center, with those drumsticks, banging on the drums, really like, into that music.

And even with the ASL. It's his language, and that's how you're supposed to feel because that is how the character is going to communicate. And I feel like it's such an important aspect that not only did he learn it, but now he's very keen on people learning how to sign because it is such a valuable language to learn. It was so good. It was so understated. It's hard for me to even say that he actually acted but, I mean we know he did. But’s it’s just so good, so natural.

Ron: I would compare Riz Ahmed’s acting in Sound of Metal to Natalie Portman in Black Swan. That ballet performance and how it made Nina was only possible because she'd done the work of learning ballet. That's the same thing here. The only reason why we believe everything that this character is doing and going through and evolving into is because Riz Ahmed put in all that effort. It comes across as so natural that you don't think you're actually watching an actor; you're watching a person. That's what great acting is.

Again, along with Steven Yeun, any other year, Riz Ahmed definitely would have won this category. But this year, it belongs to Chadwick Boseman. He should 100% get it. What a performance to leave as his legacy.

So, moving on to the ladies. We have Viola Davis from Ma Rainey’s Black Bottom. Andra Day from The United States vs Billie Holiday. Vanessa Kirby, Pieces of a Woman. Frances McDormand from Nomadland. And Carey Mulligan for Promising Young Woman.

This is a slightly harder category I would say. From the other award shows, it seems that Andra Day might be the front runner here. Unfortunately, we couldn't get to see this movie. Apparently The United States vs Billie Holiday is not a good movie. I read some reviews and it seems to be very exploitative, rather than anything else? And it's literally coasting on Andra Day’s performance.

Mon: Apparently, she sang some of the songs in it?

Ron: Yes.

Mon: I'm excited for any newbie to get awards. And when I say newbie, I mean somebody who's getting recognition for the first time at a big award show like this. I would love to have seen her performance just to rate it against these other very powerful performances. Let's see how that turns out.

My personal favorite, of course, is Viola Davis. She has my whole heart. How performance as Ma Rainey was stunning.

Ron: From that opening scene in the tent, you forget that you're watching Viola Davis. Ma Rainey was such a personality, and the way Viola Davis just embodies that. This is a woman who, when she walks into a room, everybody stands aside so she can walk through.

Mon: Yeah. One of the things that I really like about films being on Netflix is that we do have the after-film show or the after-film interviews. And for Ma Rainey’s Black Bottom, they talked about bringing this film to life. It's a play and now it's film, and the research that they did, and they learned about this personality who we hadn’t heard about. And how Viola Davis and the makeup artists and the costume artists, they really tried to embody the way she looked in real life. Because with Ma Rainey, you know she's singing for a long time, it’s sweltering heat, that why she looks very greasy. Her makeup is running, but she's got this power and she doesn't care about the glamour, you know, she's got a voice, she is using that, and that's what's entertaining, and that's what's grasping the entire crowd. Viola Davis and her entire team, they really wanted to capture that, which is what they do. They do such a great job. Ma Rainey doesn't have to look like the quintessential, glamorous, polished artist that we’re so used to seeing, because she's working hard. She's got a job to do. You don't have time for all this stuff, so I really love that. And I'm pointing this out mostly because there was a little bit of backlash because of how Ma Rainey looks in the movie. Ron: Oh really.

Mon: Yeah, there were some people saying, oh, why does she have to look so tired and sweaty. Well, that was kind of the point, so that's why I'm pointing it out. It was a deliberate, intentional effort made by the creators for this film. And Viola Davis does an excellent job of encapsulating that presence and that feeling. I really love how you have this character, based on a real person, of course, but you have this character in an era where Black people really struggled to make their voices heard, get anything that they deserved. She's like the exact opposite. And I love how this film turns the tables on that. And it’s only possible because you have somebody with that presence of Viola Davis. I would love her to win this. I don't know if she will. Maybe somebody newer, like Andra Day, deserves it more. But yeah, I've got my heart set.

Ron: You haven't seen Pieces of a Woman, but I did. I think Vanessa Kirby does the job that she has to in this film. I just think that compared to everybody else on this list, I don't get it. We were talking about how Steven Yeun’s acting in Minari was very understated. Vanessa Kirby does the same thing and Pieces of a Woman but her understatedness is so understated that there is no emotion. And I don't think it's her fault. I think it's because of the direction that she was given as an actor.

Pieces of a Woman was not as good a film as I heard that it was, which was surprising to me. I don't expect histrionics all the time, but most of the time, I was like nothing is happening on the screen, and that just did not make sense to me because the writer of the film based this story on what happened to her. And her husband was actually the director of this film. I feel like they weren't on the same page, or something got lost in translation between screenplay and direction.

I think Kirby did a really good job maybe in the first like 30-35 minutes, and then after that, she was probably told just, you know, hold it back, hold it back, hold the emotion back, and she ended up doing that really well, but the final product ended up being bland. And that might also be because they tried to stuff in other bits into a story that didn't need it. What ended up happening was that her performance was overridden by other elements.

We both feel that Yeri Han from Minari should definitely have been nominated.

Mon: Yeri Han plays the wife character in Minari; she plays Monica. She could have easily been a flat character, the long-suffering wife who just does what her husband wants, who somehow survives for her kids, but she is so much more. You can see this person trying desperately to be the supportive glue of this family. You can see this person trying to strive for her own dreams, for her own ambitions, and keep it together. And it's all because of how well Yeri Han, again in an understated fashion, just carries this character. And it is a shame, a complete and utter shame, that she did not get picked as one of the nominations.

Ron: I found myself comparing Yeri Han and Vanessa Kirby so much when I was watching these two movies, and it really made me wonder what the criteria is for the Oscars to nominate people. Both of these are very understated roles, but Yeri Han the way she emotes an entire dialogue without saying a word. That's what I wanted from Vanessa Kirby. I did not get that. And there were these moments in Minari where I was like, this is how I would react. And that's exactly how she reacted. And I was like, oh man, that's the first time that's ever happened! How does that performance not get nominated. Mon: Yeah, I'm really disappointed.

Ron: I think the problem is that we are very used to the ‘wife’ in films. Yeri Han took that and turned it into a role. And I think part of the reason why Steven Yeun has been nominated, not just on the strength of his own performance, but on the strength of Yeri Han’s. Because had she been terrible, nobody would have noticed what was happening with Steven Yeun. It's the same thing that I see with Killing Eve. The only reason why we keep focusing on how good Jodie Comer is, is because Sandra Oh is brilliant. But she never gets nominated, it's always Jodie Comer. I really, really wanted to love Vanessa Kirby's performance. I read so much about how much work she did. It just didn't come across to me.

So, moving on. Frances McDormand, Nomadland. Understated, but the right kind of understated.

Mon: The thing with Frances McDormand is that she's so effortless and natural in her roles that sometimes you think that's exactly who she is as a person. But no, she's acting, and I love that about these roles that she takes. And especially the one that she plays in Nomadland, I think, had she gone melodramatic or larger than life or the other opposite like super-emotional or something, we would not have believed this character and we would not have enjoyed the journey that we were on with her. It's the fact that she's very put-together, but she's also trying very hard to hold it together, and that comes across throughout in every scene. That's what makes it so powerful. That's what makes it so natural and immersive to watch, and it's no wonder that she's been nominated.

Ron: Yeah, I think if Frances McDormand hadn’t been nominated for Nomadland, that would have been a travesty. Again, talking about Pieces of a Woman, you can see how important direction can be for an actor. Because Frances McDormand’s understatedness could have become super-bland, had she not had the director paving her path. And that's why we get a really, really powerful performance in this film. I mean, she pretty much carries the whole thing. She could have a really good chance of winning this. Mon: Yeah, I think so too. Ron: So on the opposite end of the spectrum, we have Carey Mulligan’s Promising Young Woman. This is a very different kind of performance, just in this category. She feels like this person that you don't want to hang out with for a multitude of reasons. I think we’ve seen Carey Mulligan in quite a few films, so this performance does stand out because it's very different from what she usually does. She's kind of like preppy, and peppy. That's not what you expect. She does a really good job, but there's also like so much tension in this one, which she manages to carry very, very well.

Mon: What I like about this film is that it throws you into the middle of this story. There's no preface, and it's important because the story structure is quite a novelty, and I like that. And because we're thrown into the middle of it, we learn more about her character throughout the film, which makes her performance even more captivating. Why is this person who is young and desirable, and honestly, should have the world at her feet, going around with such a sad frame of mind? Why is she carrying herself in this terribly dejected fashion? Well, we find out.

I would say that this performance isn't as understated as some of the others in both these categories. It definitely has its moment where somebody could have gone completely over the top, but it never does. Because a) the writing doesn't allow for it and, b) the role wouldn't work if we were on either spectrum of super-gleeful or super-emotional. It's really somebody who is carrying a hurt inside her that she cannot fix, and you really feel that.

The funny thing about this film is that you’re left feeling so sad by the end of it, because you really understand this kind of, almost this kind of depression, that this character is facing, and you really feel it through her performance. It's a surprisingly captivating performance despite not being the quintessential Oscar-baity kind of thing. I'm not sure she's gonna win though.

Ron: I wonder whether the Oscars will do something completely different and be like, in light of #MeToo, we're just going to give it to this film.

Mon: I didn’t think of that. It could be.

Ron: Like, it says a lot about why #MeToo even exists. So, who knows? I think this is a very tough category. Let's see what happens.

Mon: Yeah.

Ron: So, moving on to the supporting roles. For the men, we have Sacha Baron Cohen for The Trial of the Chicago Seven. Daniel Kaluuya for Judas and the Black Messiah. Leslie Odom Jr for One Night in Miami. Paul Raci from Sound of Metal. And bizarrely, LaKeith Stanfield for Judas and the Black Messiah, even though he's the lead role.

Mon: Yeah, I'm a bit surprised, as well.

Ron: Apparently, they did put his name forward for the lead role and for some reason the Oscars put him and Daniel Kaluuya in the same category.

Mon: Listen, people who have limited screen time have sometimes been in the lead role category, other people, who are pretty much carrying a film have ended up in the supporting category. I've never understood the Oscars and what the criteria for these things are. It's literally like Tic Tac Toe sometimes. I'm actually really disappointed that both Daniel and LaKeith are in the same category, because they are so, so strong. They really deserve to have been not competing against each other, and definitely should have been frontrunners in their own categories. I mean Kaluuya is brilliant, he's always brilliant.

Ron: He is particularly good as Fred Hampton. I was just like, wow this is insane.

Mon: Like, you feel the emotional core of the burden that he's carrying, but you're also like a little bit inspired, maybe even a little bit scared, by the power of his performance and the power of his stage presence. I feel like he was really passionate about this role, but he doesn't go over the top with it. I'm sure he did a lot of research on Fred Hampton and how he carried himself. But it doesn't come across as this very manufactured or artificial kind of performance. And it definitely doesn't feel like some kind of weird, reverential take on this character. Because sometimes, that's also a problem, especially when you're embodying somebody who was a real personality and a very important personality. Sometimes you feel like you should only look at the good things. No one was perfect. And so, you should always approach those people as human beings first, but also respect the legacy that they've left. And I think he does a good job with that.

Ron: Well the thing is that Daniel Kaluuya actually spent time with Fred Hampton’s wife to find out what his personality was from her perspective. Of course, there were tapes and things that he watched so that he could actually get the physicality of the character, and that's why I think that he is a frontrunner in this category. Because we've seen Daniel Kaluuya in a lot of things and the way he plays this person, you forget that it is Daniel Kaluuya. Like, he's done the kind of research that allows him to become a person without actually showing us that he's acting it.

Mon: Listen, I'm never going to forgive the Academy for ignoring his excellent performance in Widows. He was so good in that film. I don't know why this role made me think of him in Widows, but I think it's that intensity? He's brought a very similar kind of intensity and I'm glad this one has been recognized at least. I really hope it does walk off with the award because, yeah, this is too good.

Ron: Absolutely, I agree with that. LaKeith is the lead in this film. I still can’t understand what the Academy is thinking. He is so good in this performance. He is this tortured young man who is just taking it one day at a time because he has no clue what to do. He gets into one scrape after the other. He thinks he has an out, and it's not.

Mon: His character is between a rock and a hard place, and LaKeith plays that to the tee. Like you can really feel it, his desperation to be normal, his desperation to fit in, his desperation to get out, and you just really feel it.

Ron: The thing is that it's very difficult to play a role like this because a lot of people just think of him as the bad guy. But there are so many layers to even bad guys. And LaKeith does it really well. Like there are times when there are emotions on his face, and I'm just like, he's just told us so much. If he was nominated for this role any other year, he would have won this. But I really feel like it's going to be done Daniel Kaluuya’s year.

Mon: Yeah. I hope so, as compared to most of the others.

Ron: Let’s talk about Paul Raci in Sound of Metal.

Mon: This was a surprise, yeah?

Ron: It was. He has a very understated role. He kind of plays like a mentor, and it's almost easy for you to forget that this is a person acting a role in a film. But then there’s this one scene, which was so quietly done. I can imagine that same scene in movies being full of histrionics, and gestures, loud voices…

Mon: Standing up and waving!

Ron: And banging tables, right?

Mon: Right.

Ron: And Paul Raci just keeps the same tone, and it's like a dagger in your heart. I feel like the power of that scene, coupled with the fact that, up until that point we had seen the kind of person he was, that's the reason why he's in this category. Because the only reason why that scene works is because we spent all this time with him. We've heard his tone of voice, we know how he feels about the main character, about their community, and you know where he's coming from. So yeah, this is a surprise, but now when I think about it, it makes sense.

Mon: Agreed.

Ron: Sacha Baron Cohen in The Trial of the Chicago Seven.

Mon: I know that he did a lot of research on the person that he was playing.

Ron: Okay.

Mon: He was concerned about this character, because we’re talking about somebody who was a real-life personality and when we say personality, we mean a personality. I can see he’s trying. The problem is, I could not see anybody but Sasha Baron Cohen when I was watching the movie. It was Cohen with big hair. And that's all I could see. I could not see him being anybody else. Is it a direction problem, is it just the role? He was not the best thing that film had in it.

Compared to the other roles that we've seen, just in this category, it doesn't even reach like halfway there. And it's not for lack of trying. As I said, there's a lot of effort put into it. I've read that he did a lot of research, he watched the tapes, blah blah blah. He was concerned about it. His concerns were warranted.

Ron: I think that was my problem with this entire film. Everybody felt like they were acting. They were acting, very well, but they were acting. Just as you said, I couldn't get past the fact that I was watching Sacha Baron Cohen.

Mon: And especially when he's doing the stand up. It looks like it's Sacha Baron Cohen doing the stand-up and not Abbie Hoffman. And it's just such a problem.

Ron: It would be an unpleasant shock if he were to win.

Mon: I don't want him to win.

Ron: No.

Rounding off the category is Leslie Odom Jr. in One Night in Miami. Leslie Odom Jr plays Sam Cooke. I really liked his performance. I liked everybody’s performances in this movie. Everybody should have been nominated. This movie he should have been nominated. I’m angry that it wasn't but let's talk about Leslie Odom Jr.

Mon: That voice!

Ron: I know!

Mon: How can you argue when you have a voice like that?

Ron: Oh my gosh. He has such an amazing singing voice. And he uses it so well in this film.

Mon: That scene when he sings that song. We know this song, but still.

Ron: Oh my god.

Mon: And again, credit to the way the film is directed that it hits you so hard when he sings that song.

Ron: The Sam Cooke character that we get in this film, he's kind of bombarded with negativity. He's trying to do things a certain way, his friends don't quite agree with that, and you can understand where they're coming from, but you can also understand where he's coming from. We could have had the table-thumping, the standing up and making a statement. But what you get is the finger-pointing.

Mon: [laughs] And understated finger-pointing. Nobody raises their voices. And that's what I really liked about the performances in general. And, of course, it comes down to the direction, doesn't it? We could have had somebody who, because they're so passionate about their points of view, that they could have raised their voices, they could have been punching each other, hitting each other. There are a few moments like that, but they're also being civil because they are friends. And I think when you have that underlying foundation of the characters, then it changes how you come to that performance. And it really comes across in Odom Jr.

Ron: The other aspect of this film is that these people were not only real but they were pillars of the community. They changed the way America lived and breathed. That can get to your head. The fact that none of the performances were affected by that is testament to the actors. I think any of the actors could have easily been nominated. I'm happy that Leslie Odom Jr did get nominated because his performance relies so heavily on reacting to things around him, and it could have gone terribly wrong in another actor's hands. He manages to keep it together, and it ends up being so memorable. But I still think this category belongs to Daniel Kaluuya. Let's see what happens on the day, but that's what I think.

Mon: Agreed.

Ron: So, let's move on to Supporting Role (Female). We have Maria Bakalova from the sequel for Borat. Glenn Close in Hillbilly Elegy. Olivia Coleman in The Father. Amanda Seyfried in Mank. And Yuh-Jung Youn in Minari. I haven't seen two of the performances in this category so that's not going to help.

Mon: There's been a lot of love for Maria Bakalova. This is a comedic performance. The Oscars aren't huge on comedy, so that would be a surprise. Now with Glenn Close in Hillbilly Elegy, I have not seen this film, I have seen stills. She uglies it up, which means she's gonna win.

Ron: Really, you think so?

Mon: Yeah, absolutely. First of all, she's a veteran actor, she's already been nominated several times, she's a favorite among the Academy-goers. So, I'm just like this category is definitely gone.

Ron: I know the Academy really loves it when ladies ugly-up.

Mon: Yeah, because they don't give actual ugly ladies any roles. [laughs]

Ron: [laughs] Oh god, why is that so true?

Mon: Listen. This category is a tough one. You know why? Because I'm not convinced by most of these.

Ron: Yeah, this is true.

Mon: Olivia Colman? I mean come on, she just won for The Favorite, right? Okay, she's hamming it up. She's acting but it's really. Here, she's not doing much.

Ron: You see, this is my problem with everything to do with The Father. I did not feel like I was watching a person; I was watching Anthony Hopkins. I did not feel like I was watching his daughter; I felt like I was watching Olivia Coleman. How does that get nominated?

Mon: I don't have an answer to that. It's unconvincing.

Ron: And the same thing with Amanda Seyfried. Mank, anyway as a film, we had a lot of issues with it. I think Amanda Seyfried tried to do what she could with the role, but the entire time I was like, I'm watching Amanda Seyfried.

Mon: And also, it’s not something new, this kind of role, this kind of character. It's not something new. I think we just want something refreshing which, for the most part, the other categories have really captured. Seyfried in Mank is just…

Ron: Seyfried in Mank.

Mon: Yeah. I mean, I guess the only performance we’re really rooting for is Yuh-Jung Youn in Minari. Because she's so fun!

Ron: She is so great. I think it helps that the role is quite different. Like, you think of grandmothers in a particular kind of way, and she totally is not.

Mon: And that's the whole point. And that's what I really like because she sort of doubles down on being this unconventional grandmom, because ‘grandmom’ is not a category of humanity. She's a person.

Ron: I love how, when her grandchildren are like, what kind of grandmum are you, you can’t bake, you don't do this, you can’t do that and she's like, why does that make me not a grandmom? She just decides that she's going to be her version of a grandmum and if that means sitting down in front of the television and watching it, that's fine! But everybody just has to deal with it. I loved it! It was just such a natural and fun performance.

So, when things kinda go bad, you're so angry at the world, you're just like, please no, no, no, don't let this happen. She's such a wonderful person! And that's why I think she deserves to win because she got all my emotions going so much. As I said earlier, I am a sucker for a grandmum character, and she's so good. She put in an amazing performance that didn’t feel like a performance. I was like, this is my grandmum.

Mon: You’re right. Absolutely. Because how the grandmum is in the second half of the film as compared to the first half of the film, they're the same person, but you would not feel the impact of the second half, if you hadn't met her and gotten to know her in the first half. And again, that's down to the fact that we had this really powerful, but very natural, performance. It feels authentic, and that's the whole point of these awards, isn't it?

Ron: Yes.

Mon: It's to give it to the best people. Yuh-Jung Youn might just be the person.

Ron: She's our pick, for sure. I feel like Maria Bakalova just might win this.

Mon: Oh wow.

Ron: I think the Academy is trying to do things differently. They want to show that they're not, you know, staid, fuddy-duddies who only give serious films all the awards. So, they might be like, it's a comedy, let's give it to her. And also, there was all that stuff about Rudy Giuliani and stuff like that, which I think might just be a reason for them handing the award over to her.

Mon: Okay, that'd be really interesting to see.

Ron: Yeah. The two acting categories for ladies is really hard this time. I think the male categories are very obvious who the winner is. The ladies, no idea.

Mon: Don't prove us wrong.

Ron: Okay, so we just want to touch on directing and film editing. There is some overlap with the Best Picture category. I'm interested to hear your thoughts.

Mon: Honestly, I am so torn between Emerald Fennell and Chloe Zhao. This is the first year the Academy has given to women nominations for the directing category. Let's just remind you guys that this is the 93rd Academy Award. I think both those films are so accomplished, so different…

Ron: So necessary. Either one of them could win.

Mon: Yeah.

Ron: My concern is that because there are two ladies, they're going to be like, they're in a separate category, and the rest of the guys are in the category of their own.

Mon: And that's the default category, so we're actually going to only choose between the three of them. Yeah, I hope not. Because I feel like Chloe Zhao should get it simply because Nomadland actually deals with a topic that is very popular with American film goers, and she's given it a completely new veneer, which I like. So, maybe she is front runner for it.

Ron: I also feel like Nomadland is definitely very well accomplished. I say this because it's not a very easy film to make. They’re on the move; they’re showing these very different kinds of landscapes. We're also going into these very tight interiors. She managed to balance that out very well, while also giving the performances so much room to breathe.

For me my pick would actually be Nomadland.

Mon: Interesting.

Ron: Because Promising Young Woman, another very accomplished film. I think it has a very familiar narrative structure. There are some shots which, when I thought about later on, I was like, ‘it's interesting that she used that angle’, but Nomadland just feels very different.

Mon: The thing about Promising Young Woman, as excited as I am that it's been nominated for so many categories, especially in the directing category, it feels very commercial

Ron: Yes

Mon: And mainstream. Most of these Academy Award nominations are very artsy very indie, or at least they feel like that. So Promising Young Woman with the peppy vibe and the colors and stuff, I think might be too different for what the Academy really likes to think of as cinematic excellence.

Ron: That's a good point, and that might be a reason why it wins.

Mon: Oh, I hope so.

Ron: Yeah.

Mon: You know who I’m surprised is not on here—even though we're not the biggest fans of the film—The Father, directed by Florian Zeller. I am surprised Florian isn't here, you know why? Because, as I mentioned, cinematically, it has such brilliant technique that I'm surprised the Academy didn't recognize it. I mean one of the problems that we had with it was that it's so slick, which should have shoehorned it into this category, but it didn't.

Ron: But I think that's exactly what would have happened, it would have been shoehorned into this category. Because The Father didn't do anything that we haven't already seen a billion times before. I'm sorry, that's not a unique film at all. I'm glad it didn't get nominated.

Mon: I'm surprised that Minari has been nominated. Like Lee Isaac Chung, I would not have thought that he'd be here.

Ron: Why not? Mon: Well, it’s such a personal narrative. It's just so small.

Ron: Yeah.

Mon: The Academy just love something that is larger than life, even when it's something to do with farming, you know. There's no KKK running after these people, so, like, how did this film even get noticed by the Academy. I'm surprised. I'm surprised it's in any category, but the direction I'm really surprised.

Ron: I'm trying to give the Academy the benefit of the doubt. Maybe they're realizing that they've been kind of in one direction this whole time. So we're getting to see people like Emerald Fennell and Chloe Zhao and Lee Isaac Chung actually get nominated for these amazing accomplishments.

Mon: And these varied films.

Ron: Exactly. I think that Minari  actually works so well because the direction is really good. He keeps it small. He doesn't aim for something too huge. We just follow this family. And that's why the final product is so good.

One thing I've never understood about the Academy, ever since their changed the Best Picture nomination number to 10, I don't know why the director category hasn't followed suit. It doesn't make any sense to me. Having said that, I am so glad that it's Minari, Nomadland and Promising Young Woman that ended up in this category. They deserve it. As far as I'm concerned, this category is between these three. These are the most innovative films in this category.

Mon: Which is exactly why David Fincher for Mank will win.

Ron: Don’t say that.

Mon: I’m sorry but we know that Hollywood loves films about Hollywood; the Academy loves to recognize films about Hollywood. This is a passion project, it's about a very controversial, personal story that many Academy Award board members are going to feel like it resonates with them...

Ron: Because they were there at the same time.

Mon: You're probably not wrong. I don't actually have any hope for anybody else in this category, I'm sorry, it's true.

Ron: But even amongst David Fincher’s work, this is not a good film.

Mon: Yeah, but tell the Academy that.

Ron: It’s so… blah. The shots are so blah. Everything we see in Mank you've seen a million times before.

Mon: I agree with you. It feels like it’s trying to be of the time that it is portraying, but at the same time, it never looks like it. Just putting a black and white filter on your film, and using the same shots that Orson Welles would have used does not make your film innovative and new.

But we just have to resign ourselves to the truth. Fincher is considered an auteur. So, he's likely to win.

Ron: As far as I'm concerned, auteurs are basically people who do the same thing over and over again. And that's what Mank feels like. You know who I would have really loved to see in this category? Regina King. I was watching One Night in Miami and the entire time I was like, “why didn't this get nominated?” It's not just the shots. It's the way she portrayed the story to us. And this is her first time directing a feature film, it doesn't feel like it. Honestly, I feel like this was the year that you should have been nominating all these people. Why is David Fincher here? I just don't think even in David Fincher’s oeuvre, Mank is not his best work.

Mon: Yeah, the only thing is with One Night in Miami, it's technically very brilliant, especially for a first-time director, but it does feel like a first-time director’s work. There is a safety in how it is created.

That being said, at least it doesn't feel like a play, which is what it's based on. But compared to the others which are nominated, I can see why Regina King was overlooked. Though the film really should have made it to the Best Pictures noms, at least.

Ron: So, Another Round by Thomas Vinterberg. See, this is the thing; how has he been nominated for directing, but his movie was not deemed good enough to be nominated for Best Picture? What is the criteria? Honestly, I just don't understand what is happening!

Because when I watch this film, it's actually very uncomfortable to watch because there's so much shakey cam.

Mon: Oh!

Ron: And I was just like, I know you're trying to set the mood that there's a lot of drinking happening here, but it's just making me feel disoriented, so I'm not enjoying this experience. I don't think he was doing anything that different. In my opinion, it is between Minari, Nomadland and Promising Young Woman because those three are the ones that really stand out in this category. And as far as I'm concerned Minari and Nomadland actually do something completely different. They are the innovators. I'm hoping for Chloe Zhao to win because Nomadland really stood out to me.

Mon: Let's quickly go over editing. This is a tough category to really understand from a lay person's point of view.

Ron: Yeah.

Mon: Because when editing is done well, you will not notice it.

Ron: Which is making me question so many entries in this editing category. Because The Father has editing that is so obvious.

Mon: I agree with you on that.

Ron: I was like, oh look, here's a cut. Oh look, here's a camera change. How is this nominated for film editing? That way, again, Nomadland, edited by Chloe Zhao—who did pretty much everything in this film, oh my gosh, how did she do it—has such good editing, because you don't notice it.

Mon: Yeah, you are on this journey with this character. You feel the land that she is traversing, you get to know the characters that she is meeting.

Ron: You feel that claustrophobia in her trailer, and how it differs from everything that’s happening around her. It's just such good editing because you don't notice anything. It's just an experience.

Mon: Yeah, there's like this moment where Frances McDormand’s character is like a few yards away from her nearest neighbor, who's also in a van, and she sees her neighbor put up a flag. And we don't really understand the significance of that flag till a few scenes later when Frances McDormand needs help and she’s knocking on this person’s door, and her neighbor goes, “didn’t you see the sign?”.  You you realize the flag is basically supposed to say do not disturb. And I think that's where editing and direction comes in, because anywhere else you would be told, it would be signposted that yes, this flag is going up because she does not want to be disturbed, go away now. But here it’s backwards, and it's important for us to feel that way because the character may not have known what the flag is about. And we're in her shoes. That's the whole point. And that again addresses why this film has got as many nominations as it has. And why probably it should win.

Ron: Absolutely.

We also have Promising Young Woman here. I think the editing here is pretty commercial, it's not very different. It serves the purpose of narrating the story. So, in that sense, it's pretty technically sound.

Mon: Well, I think there's one scene which has won it the film editing nomination. We can't talk about it but in the hands of any other director, especially a male director, we would have seen that scene in a completely different way.

Ron: I actually think there are two things that have made it, editing-wise, so powerful. And the reason why it's been nominated. And in that scene, I think a lot of directors would have chosen to maybe cut. But here, the director gave her actors so much leeway to play out the scene that the editing, you don't notice it.

Mon: On the basis of just that scene that you just mentioned, I feel like this film should definitely sweep this award. Honestly, the power of that scene really comes across in the use of camera cuts, or the lack thereof.

Ron: Exactly. And that is actually one of the reasons why Promising Young Woman really works, because it knows when not to cut.

Sound of Metal.

Mon: I am truly surprised that it's in the film editing category. Are you?

Ron: I'm glad that it is, I think sound editing, it did a really great job, but I think it's really easy to focus on that aspect of the film, and forget that the actual film editing also makes the story and the sound more important. I'm going to compare it to Another Round where the editing is so jarring. And so obviously edited. I'm glad it's not in this category, but Sound of Metal doesn't do that. It moves the camera away and it cuts at certain points where the audience needs that extra information. I think the way it's edited works for this film, I don't think it's the kind of style that would work for everything else, but because it fits so well with this narrative, I think that's why it's been nominated.

Mon: Yeah, because I think with the film editing, as well as the sound editing, both of them combined, it helps you walk in the shoes of this character, which as you say, is only possible when it's a very personal, individual story like it is with Sound of Metal. I'm kind of glad it's got some technical noms. If nothing else, because we know it's a real long shot for the Best Picture award winner. It could get the technical awards.

What is the Trial of the Chicago 7 doing here?

Ron: I don't know.

Mon: I spent most of that film wondering where the sightlines were.

Ron: Yes.

Mon: Right?

Ron: Yeah.

Mon: There’s this scene where somebody is walking up a flag and the character is looking to the left, but the flag is in the center, and I'm like, “where are you standing?”

Ron: The sightlines weren’t the only problem. We have a chunk of this film taking place in a courtroom, and it felt like I was watching Law and Order. So what is the innovation here? Why has it been nominated?

You know what should have been nominated in both the directing and editing categories? Birds of Prey. Okay, look, we love this movie so we are a bit biased. But Cathy Yan did an amazing job. She should definitely have been in the directing category, and the editing the scene in Gotham PD, come on.

Mon: Well, there are two major reasons why Birds of Prey didn't get any nominations, though, I really feel like it should have. First of all, it's a very comic book-y film, and also structurally, the story is very nonlinear.

Ron: Let us put it out there that Suicide Squad won an Oscar.

Mon: I am currently speechless.

Ron: So, who do you think is going to win this? Honestly, I want Chloe Zhao to get everything.

Mon: Yeah, but I think The Father is going to win.

Ron: I think that would be a mistake.

Mon: It's going to happen.

Ron: So we're going to round off with the screenplay categories. In the adapted section we have the Borat sequel—please don’t make me say the whole name—The Father, Nomadland, One Night in Miami and The The White Tiger.

Mon: We haven't seen the Borat film so we cannot attest to its merits. This is a tough category.

Ron: Ok, so we have two films that are based on plays, The Father and One Night in Miami. I think that we’re both of the same mind that One Night in Miami is definitely superior as an adaptation of a play. The Father feels like a play on film. One Night in Miami feels like a film. So, if it's between those two, it should be One Night in Miami.

Mon: You're going to root for Nomadland, aren't you?

Ron: I am but I have to say, The The White Tiger was a really good adaptation. I thought that was a solid, solid screenplay. I'm actually really annoyed that it didn't get nominated in anything else. As far as I'm concerned, it should have been up for directing, it should have been up for Best Picture, it should have been up for Best Actor. How do these things not happen? I don't understand what the Academy does, really. Like, what is everybody sitting there doing?

Mon: Dude, the fact that a film based in India with Indian actors even got nominated for anything, is like a surprise—in a good way, I guess. It's a film that looks at the poverty and the caste system in India, without actually sensationalizing it or making it completely the norm. There are different kinds of Indians that you will meet in India, as we see in this film. And I'm just surprised that the Academy noticed that.

Ron: You know what irritates me? Slumdog Millionaire won everything, when it was a bad film. And it portrayed India in a really condescending light.

Mon: And considering it was based on a book which was hard-hitting, spoke about the issues that we face in India all the time, but had this sort of fun vibe to it, and Slumdog Millionaire was just an atrocity, as far as I'm concerned.

With The White Tiger, I was very resistant to watching it.

Ron: Me too.

Mon: But yes, while it does portray the abject poverty of sections of society—and it is a little bit scary how people on both sides can treat each other—it also has this updated 21st century mentality that we haven't seen in portrayals of India in Hollywood for a while.

Ron: This was a really good film. I am really irritated that it hasn't got the recognition that it has. I mean, Ava DuVernay was a producer on this, so… But what I loved about The White Tiger was that it didn't coast on the name Ava DuVernay. Everybody else put a lot of work into it.

Mon: And it also didn’t gratuitously show us, you know, the disgusting aspects of India. It also shows you the grandeur that is Delhi and Bangalore, while telling you that yes, there are people living in villages in absolute squalor.

Ron: But what I liked is that doesn't keep throwing that squalor in your face, because people live there. For heaven's sake, you can't just keep saying, “oh my god it's so disgusting”. No, no, this is how people live.

Mon: Respect that.

Ron: Exactly. So I'm irritated, but I really hope that it wins this category.

Mon: Yeah that would be nice, right?

Ron: Yes, I am rooting for Nomadland.

Mon: Why am I not surprised?

Ron: But I would happily let Ramin Bahrani win this for The White Tiger.

So, original screenplay. We have Judas and the Black Messiah, Minari, Promising Young Woman, Sound of Metal and Trial of the Chicago 7. One of these things is not like the others.

Mon: [Laughs]

Ron: I'm sorry, the fact that Aaron Sorkin continues to get recognized and nominated for his writing when he is a bad writer, just drives me up the wall.

Mon: It's sometimes hard to differentiate between entertaining writing, and good writing.

Ron: But is he even entertaining?

Mon: Some people find that banter entertaining.

Is this the subject matter that deserves this kind of banter, this kind of writing? No it doesn't. It requires a deft hand, it requires a respectful hand and we have mentioned this several times and we've talked about this, which is that it does not respect the horrible situation that the people in it were facing.

Ron: It should definitely not win this category.

Mon: It will win this category.

Ron: Oh gosh, your cynicism. I believe that the Academy is going to do things differently.

Mon: I'm a pragmatist and I don't believe that.

Ron: Parasite won last year. Parasite was the best film among all the nominees. There were a lot of other films that should have been nominated, we always are going to be angry about that, but Academy actually recognized how good Parasite was, and it gave it the awards that it deserved. Maybe, maybe, this is the change that we are seeing. And Trial of the Chicago 7, even though it's been nominated to make a certain group of people happy, it won't actually win.

Mon: Well, we will find out.

I think Judas and the Black Messiah has a really good chance here. I think partly because of Daniel Kaluuya’s performance and the fact that Best Picture should kind of belong to it. It just has a really strong story.

Mon: Yeah.

Ron: I know you had issues with the second act; I didn't have that. I feel like it managed to balance these really big, larger than life characters with a story that had you guessing. It was packed full of characters, like, it's very much the opposite of Sound of Metal and Minari which has very small pockets of characters. But Judas and the Black Messiah is much more sweeping, so many people and every single person matters, every single story within the story matters. And cohesively as a whole, the film works because the writing is so strong as well.

Mon: I 100% agree with you on that. I will say that when you Algee Smith men in a role, you give me more of him on screen.

Ron: [Laughing] Ok.

So, Minari.

Mon: I want this one to win.

Ron: Me too.

Mon: Because it's a very simple story. We discussed this when we talked about the film in the Best Picture category, there is a universality to the events of this film that reflects many of our journeys. And I think that's the power of this writing; you can kind of see yourself in different ways. You can see yourself in different characters from the kid to the grandma, right?

And I feel like sometimes the Academy does like these personal stories about the American Dream, which honestly Minari is doing in spades.

Ron: I also feel like the reason why Minari you could win this category is because, you know what I was saying about Pieces of a Woman and how it adds things to make it bigger than it really is. Minari never does that, it’s contained to this one family because even little things can seem big when it's your life and it's people who you love, and that's what a great story, that's what a great writer, does. So yeah, I think it might just win this category as well.

Mon: Well, I think it's funny that you mentioned that things are huge and important when it's somebody that you love, because that ties into Promising Young Woman.

Ron: I mean that entire film is about doing something for somebody that you love, and everything that they felt is amplified because of how you feel about them. But nobody else around you can even imagine it because it doesn't bother them. That person has nothing to do with them.

And I think that's why the writing in this film is quite strong, because it's through the lens of this one character. Of course, the performance that Carey Mulligan puts in does amplify just how terrible she is feeling, just how strong this loss is for her in comparison to how everybody else is actually reacting to it.

And it’s a really strong story because that tension, it’s not just well conveyed on the screen, it had to be there on the page.

It does help that the writing and directing is done by the same person. I think this year we've seen that quite a lot, even with Chloe Zhao, she did the producing, writing, editing, and directing for her film, Nomadland which is a really really accomplished, really powerful, cohesive and memorable product.

Nomadland is not the kind of movie that you and I would watch, and maybe not even enjoy it but this one, my god. And the same thing with Promising Young Woman, she wrote it, directed it, produced it, and you can see the final product.

Mon: It's the ability to translate exactly how you feel on the page to the screen. And I think so often you see that divide because the person who directs a movie, sometimes isn't in sync with the person who wrote it, and that really undercuts important subject matters.

Ron: This is my problem with Pieces of a Woman, and that's why Vanessa Kirby's performance, it's not that good. It just doesn't work because the people around her weren't working together, though I don't know why.

Mon: I'm partial to Promising Young Woman winning as well, because it's a topical issue, and it's well written, it's entertaining in a very scary fashion.

Ron: Exactly. I mean this is a suspense thriller about a topic that a lot of people have had to deal with, but it comes across as a film that is also entertaining, so it's actually a good one for this category.

So finally Sound of Metal.

Mon: This one surprised me.

Rob: The writing for Sound of Metal feels just like a person's story like they're going day by day. That can actually be really hard to write. Again like Minari, this doesn't try too hard, it doesn't go too far, it knows what its aim is, and it stays within that scope. I think the problem with things like The Trial of the Chicago Seven is that the scope was so huge that the final product is, well, it's just not very good, and it doesn't do justice to the characters, or the narrative.

Sound of Metal is exactly the opposite. It takes this one person, his journey, and it just runs with it. And the other thing is that, a lot of films feel like, you know, we shouldn’t be linear because that's cliched or it's been done. But Sound of Metal works so well because of its linear narrative; it doesn't keep going back and forth. You are taking this journey with this person. So yeah, I think it has a pretty good chance as well.

So, I think we want four of these films to win. [laughs] And we don’t care about Aaron Sorkin. I would say the Academy is trying. We have unexpected entries this year in the major categories, which is exciting. The diversity is there. There's room for so much more. But I think one of the biggest problems that the Academy has had this year is by trying to play it safe with certain choices. My hope is that the Academy voters will see the innovation of films like Judas and the Black Messiah, Minari, Promising Young Woman, Nomadland. Sound of Metal and really begin to usher in a whole different way of filmmaking, because we can't be something if we can't see it. We've seen it with Parasite, are we going to see it this year?

Who do you think should win these categories at the Academy Awards 2021? We'd love to hear from you.

You can find us on Twitter @Stereo_Geeks. Or send us an email stereogeekspodcast@gmail.com. We hope you enjoyed this episode. And see you next week!

Mon: The Stereo Geeks logo was created using Canva. The music for our podcast comes courtesy Audionautix.

[Continuum by Audionautix plays]

Transcription by Otter.ai, Ron, and Mon.

[somnilogical]

transgenderer: okay so you know the trope where when you get too much eldritch knowledge and suddenly you start seeing giant monsters everywhere that are invisible to everyone else? that’s what being a trans woman is like.

this cluster of abilities keeps being instrumentally useful to model for reasoning about transfems. promethea and bendini independently talked about this:

[08:56] Bendini: This sounds like parody, but with californians it is difficult to tell

[image of fb post:

Daniel Powell: That report claims both that all entrances were blocked and also that a police vehicle entered and exited the camp; was that because the police vehicle was capable of offoad movement that typical vehicles are incapable of? My heart goes out to the kids on the high course who were subjected to unjustifiable physical pain or mental suffering as a result of seeing people in Guy Fawkes masks, and all the people who had their personal liberty violated.

Like Reply 11h]

[09:02] Bendini: also this is a lot less credible if you haven't forgotten what happened with Brent

[09:02] Bendini: regardless of whether Anna is secretly a transphobe

[09:03] Bendini: rather than just scared of one particular trans person

[09:03] Bendini: the same sort of defence was trotted out for brent, and he was guilty

[09:05] Bendini: yeah, ziz is crazy and a lot of stuff posted is just ramblings

[09:06] Bendini: but I can see the model of everyone being sufficiently cowardly that the crazy bring forward the accusations before the courageous do

[09:23] promethea: gotta love how nobody can quite agree exactly how the people involved are Bad and Evil but people are nonetheless confident that they are schizophrenic/narcissistic/abusers/violent and must be confined and put on chemical mind control

[image of fb post:

Romeo Stevens: I'd recommend whomever has comparative advantage to familiarize themselves with the narcissism/bpd/aspd cluster, more evocatively called energy vampires. Such people are not stable and can grow violent when they are deprived attention they believe they are entitled to. The book Character Disturbance is fairly good for a start. It is a known falilure mode for communities of people who have faced their own social isolation to fail at filtering. To be clear, such people deserve compassion, but they need professional help. They don't benefit from a bunch of people whose time is valuable (one of the reasons they are attracted to such people because more validation) paying attention to their narratives.

9h Edited]

[09:24] promethea: there's been an awful lot of "not saying, but just saying" of a type that screams of monkeyball hysteria and attacking any characteristics that can be painted as vulnerabilities open for attack

[09:26] promethea: (also Ben the reason why you find Ziz's blog full of "just ramblings" is that you have a particular neurotype that is very... I don't have a good value-neutral way of expressing the difference but maybe "mundane" as opposed to "eldritch")

[09:35] Bendini: yeah the idea of someone saying get professional help is a strong sign they have not thought through what they are saying

[09:36] Bendini: like, a quick glance at what professional mental health treatment looks like in the US (therapy in the UK is afaik good for low hanging fruit, but not much else)

[09:37] Bendini: "these people should be reported to the mental health authoritities to be dealt with"

[09:37] Bendini: "Uhhh, I mean get the compassion they need"

[09:38] Bendini: I have to say, you would be the first person in the history of ever to call my neurotype mundane

[09:39] Bendini: I see what you are getting at

[09:39] Bendini: but it is like, how many standard deviations of weirdness are you on

[09:39] Bendini: and I said most, not all

[09:40] promethea: I think it's more like what direction your weirdness is in; "grounded" or "basic bitch" were other words I considered

[09:40] promethea: it's similar to the difference between EAs who want to find out how to best help the global poor, and the ones who get very preoccupied over whether insecticides are causing catastrophic suffering

[09:43] Bendini: "tethered to reality, somehow" would be an alternative

[09:45] Bendini: I think it's due to having like 50% really normie emotions

[09:45] promethea: "tethered to consensus reality" is how I'd adjust that phrasing

[09:46] promethea: it may be something to do with a sense that the world is fundamentally sane but just really bad at its job, vs the world being fundamentally insane and only aligned with the actual reality by little more than grace of gnon

[09:49] promethea: and probably some kind of a fundamental unshakeable-to-barely-shakeable prior rather than something that responds to ordinary reasoning

[09:50] Bendini: what do we mean by fundementally sane vs insane here?

[09:51] promethea: good catch, that's a nightmare to unpack

[09:53] promethea: a lot of the early LW stuff is comparatively eldritch in this sense, especially for the context of not having had LW yet

[09:56] promethea: in an environment where being trans isn't normal trans people have a certain inherent eldritch-ness, but a person fitting neatly into a third gender social role in a culture where that has always been a thing is not eldritch in that way

[09:57] promethea: it's the difference between "other people are trying their best even if their best isn't that good" vs. "other people are systematically gaslighting you about everything until proven otherwise"

[10:01] Bendini: ah

[10:02] Bendini: I'd put the difference down to people being really really crap at explaining things because the message is in there but it's between the lines

[10:02] Bendini: not intentionally, but because they don't know how else to do it

[10:03] promethea: https://www.lesswrong.com/posts/sYgv4eYH82JEsTD34/beyond-the-reach-of-god this is probably the most explicit work by EY on what I've been calling the eldritch

[10:04] Bendini: and if you don't have enough of the fuzzy experience knowledge to do it, following what they are saying will be experienced as gaslighting

[10:04] promethea: and specifically, Beyond the Reach of God is trying to shake a component of the fundamental sense of security and move people towards the eldritch side

[10:05] Bendini: this sounds like the fundamental autist experience which cleaves into paranoia or extreme submissiveness to authority

[10:08] promethea:

I'd put the difference down to people being really really crap at explaining things because the message is in there but it's between the lines

not intentionally, but because they don't know how else to do it

and if you don't have enough of the fuzzy experience knowledge to do it, following what they are saying will be experienced as gaslighting

I'm thinking more of the thing about "seek professional help"

[10:09] Bendini: the yud post does not

[10:09] promethea: a mundane interpretation is "professional help isn't actually that helpful but I don't know that" while an eldritch interpretation is like "these people should be reported to the mental health authoritities to be dealt with"

[10:09] Bendini: as I'm rereading it

[10:10] Bendini: I do not believe the world is just

[10:10] Bendini: or that things will work out fine in the end because they always do

[10:11] Bendini: given, y'know, that I used to be a prepper

[10:15] Bendini: also I may have figured out how to reconcile "anna is a transphobe and admitted it outright" with what has been said

[10:16] Bendini: which I suspect pete knows based on what he said, but he doesn't say it outright

[10:18] promethea: "eldritch" isn't about just-world beliefs, it's closer to "a quality that makes one faster to disalieve things like just-world or other aspects of consensus reality"

[10:21] Bendini: I think there's some conflation between beleif in verbal consensus reality and belief that you can anticipate what other people will do probabalistically

[10:22] Bendini: I do not beleive in the former, but I think I had enough natural talent at the latter to reach a kind of escape velocity

[10:24] Bendini: i.e. have enough to build on/enough peices of the jigsaw put in that I could keep filling it in

[10:26] promethea: it's not about "eldritch means you can't model other people"

[10:29] promethea: if anything, mundane models are the ones that are sacrificing modeling ability

[10:30] promethea: ...seeing patterns where people insist is only noise but that noise just so happens to be awfully conveniently shaped...

[10:30] Bendini: if I am defined as the non-eldridch side, this sounds like something that could be falsified

[10:31] promethea: I'm feeling like this is a beautiful meta-level illustration of the difference between the neurotypes but way less useful on the object level or to someone who doesn't already have an unspeakable sense of what the difference is

[10:33] promethea: I don't know how to get the qualia across to someone who doesn't already have the thing and be thus able to possibly grok it from what I'm vaguely gesturing at

[10:34] Bendini: is there a way to demonstrate information transmission between 2 eldridch people?

[10:36] promethea: ziz's blog has a lot of content that makes perfect sense to people who have a quality that's probably strongly aligned with eldritch, but apparently looks like ramblings to people who don't

[10:38] promethea: some things are just ordinarily difficult to understand in that they require a lot of work, while others are actually mind-bending to properly comprehend, and eldritch minds are more bendy in that way?

[10:41] promethea: which also increases vulnerability to infohazards, cognitohazards, overfitting, demonic possession and generally going nuts, but the idea that eldritch is inherently less sane only applies to socioculturally mediated definitions of sanity

[10:42] Bendini: my immidiate reaction to "socioculturally mediated definitions of sanity" was "yes, and creditworthyness is a social construct"

[10:43] promethea: if reality is less well-matched with consensus reality then the bendiness of eldritch minds means that they can more easily construct accurate maps of the territory

[10:44] Bendini: can you think of a way to compare viewing that map to the territory?

[10:44] Bendini: as in, not being able to show the map is a given

[10:45] Bendini: but the outputs of the map

[10:47] promethea: seeing power, seeing prejudice and bias, seeing other things polite society pretends aren't real...

[10:49] promethea: and it's polite society all the way down

[10:49] Bendini: that's not really what I meant

[10:50] Bendini: I mean for example, using the ability to see those things to predict other things in a way that can be isolated from fuzzy confirmation bias

[10:51] Bendini: like I can very much believe ziz's blog is relatable and intuitive to you

[10:52] Bendini: and you have to do less interpretive labour to get a true insight from it

[10:53] Bendini: but the thing I'm pointing at as ramblings is seperate from that

[10:58] promethea: would it make sense if I rephrased it as "less cognitive filtering"? being able to see more signal in noise, especially where the signals are something you aren't supposed to be seeing for some reason or another, but at the cost that you're more likely to see signals where there is only noise

[11:02] Bendini: that makes sense

[11:03] Bendini: but it assumes that all people who don't do the eldrich thing can't go down the abstraction ladder

[11:04] promethea:

can't go down the abstraction ladder

can you elaborate?

[11:04] Bendini: what is salient to someone isn't completely a choice

[11:05] Bendini: but what you notice is based on what you've learned is useful to pay attention to

[11:07] Bendini: I could say something about forests leaves and trees

[11:07] Bendini: but it would be a bit cliche

[11:08] Bendini: something that might sink in would be more like someone paying attention to what is going on at the binary level as bits are moving between the hard drive memory and cpu

[11:09] Bendini: yes, it is useful to know what is going on so you understand other things

[11:10] Bendini: but hyperfixating on that while you are writing code on a much higher level of abstraction

[11:10] Bendini: in a sense, you are "seeing things that others have been trained not to see"

[11:10] Bendini: or don't understand

[11:10] Bendini: but doing that on a frame by frame level rather than an intutive "you know what's up" kinda level

[11:11] Bendini: is going to result in glaring errors from the stuff you aren't paying enough attention to

[11:15] promethea: it's not autism except possibly to the degree that autism weakens one's priors

[11:16] Bendini: agree, there are plenty of basic bitch autists

[11:17] Bendini: but like, the autistic catgirl cluster

[11:18] Bendini: it is a recurring pattern that some of them obsess over social reality in the way ziz does, yet keep getting into abusive relationships which were predictable from the outset

[11:18] Bendini: which idk, maybe this is a bit of a basic bitch take here

[11:19] Bendini: but this seems like the opposite of what should happen if they had reached the higher plane of knowledge that cannot be explained in words

[11:20] promethea: I'm not expecting all men to be able to do twenty pull-ups just because testosterone improves upper body strength

[11:22] promethea: the "eldritch" neurotype might also be called "psychoticism" but in the sense of a personality trait like extroversion and not in the sense of mental illness

[11:22] Bendini: no, but if those men claim to be much stronger because they have the magical testosterone elixir

[11:22] Bendini: and they keep getting beaten up by 5ft anorexic girls

[11:23] Bendini: at what point do you say "no, you do not have the thing you claim to have"

[11:30] promethea: no what I've been trying to say is that there appears to be a neurotype-level difference in how people process some types of information with predictable (in terms of not requiring loads of epicycles) upsides (having an easier time making accurate models where they contradict consensus reality) and downsides (having an easier time making inaccurate models where they contradict consensus reality)

[11:30] Bendini: the psychotiticism framing does help explain part of it

[11:31] Bendini: but that feels like the motte

[11:31] Bendini: it's the bailey I have trouble with

[11:31] promethea: I can't comment on the precise situation with the Bay catgirls because I'm not familiar enough with it to feel comfortable making non-obvious inferences

[11:33] Bendini: okay

[11:33] Bendini: I wonder how my experiences with psychedelics map into this though

[11:34] promethea: a bit of a shitpost-y formulation might be that high psychoticism-as-a-personality-trait is like having the safety guards off the [insert power tool that best fits the analogy] of your mind; it makes it easier to make some cuts that you'd otherwise struggle with, but it also makes it easier to cut things you wouldn't actually want to cut like yourself

[11:34] promethea: psychedelics would be expected to increase psychoticism-as-a-personality-trait

[11:35] Bendini: you'd expect them to do it while on them though

[11:35] promethea: both temporarily (very strongly) and permanently (from what it seems)

[11:35] Bendini: I seem to get neither in some important ways

[11:36] Bendini: like certain kinds of art and music

[11:36] Bendini: it was a sanity check of sorts

[11:37] promethea: (this also fits with my experience that when my dopamine levels are increased I get better at the thinks but also more likely to be overconfidently wrong, and that most antipsychotics are dopamine antagonists, etc.)

[11:38] Bendini: if I cannot see mediocre art as anything more than mediocre art while I'm hallucinating, it really isn't a case of me not being open to it

[11:39] Bendini: it's a case of wine in expensive bottles

[11:40] Bendini: I do think I have had some changes though

[11:40] Bendini: more sympathy to points of view people cannot express verbally

[11:46] promethea: I don't think "finding deep meaning in mediocre art" is any kind of a necessary characteristic of increased PAAPT (psychoticism-as-a-you-know-what), especially given that "mediocre art actually has deep meaning when on drugs" is the social reality

[13:28] Bendini: I mean more the ability to be open minded and see the beauty in things

[13:28] Bendini: because I could totally see the beauty of a brick wall

[13:28] Bendini: just some girl showed me her pretty mediocre drawings

[13:29] Bendini: and I was pretty speechless because the mediocrity was the salient characteristic

[13:30] Bendini: I find it suspends judgement for a longer period

[13:31] Bendini: but when my mind speaks out to me my concience is much louder

[13:32] Bendini: this does not seem to be the standard reaction to psychadelics

[13:32] Bendini: the basic bitch lurks deep in my lizard brain

(dont agree with all of promethea's characterization of the phenomena; but its clearly seeded from looking at the same phenomena that i am. bendini does not get whats going on at all here.)

ive referenced leveraging this to do what seems impossible or unpredictable to normies as creepy transfem mind powers. then people are like 'saraaah ccc somni said trans women have creepy mind powers thats crazy talk right?' and sarah c's like 'well yes its true trans women have a high iq'.

but this is kind of eliding over different kinds of intelligence as neurotypes and collapsing it all into "iq". transfems and ashkies arent just generically "intelligent" theres specific neurotypes behind the inteligence. like for ashkies the sort of things that get recorded in metrics are high "verbal" iq and "math" iq and average "spatial" iq. thats a specífic signature.

see: http://web.mit.edu/fustflum/documents/papers/AshkenaziIQ.jbiosocsci.pdf

"high intelligence" can look like hyperlexia and it can also look like dissociative mind powers that let people see through the matrix and be unnervingly good at reasoning over embeddings of yourself.

like as intelligence increases, general capacity at solving problems increases. but maybe you shunt symbols instead of rotate objects to solves a problem. which affects what kinds of problems you can easily solve, given some are more amiable to one approach over another. there are many instances where visual proofs without words are much shorter than doing lots of algebra and vice-versa.

these specificities allow high-inteligence subpopulations to collude within neuroclades along these lines of similarity. downstream of this is that a lot of ppl accuse both jews and transfems of conspiracy and being "friends" with each other when a lot of mutual information comes from neurotype similarity not meeting and deciding on a plan. (thats not to say, you know, that there are never meetings about how to take over the multiverse...)

its amusing how like transfems will talk with each other about stuff and then ppl will be like "arghh!!! my eyes! this writing is painful static! its an infohazard!! its a glitch in the matrix!! AIEEEEGYRGHLSMERGLEGLunk pshhhur" and then say they dont understand what you are saying but it probably means you are a creepy violent misogynistic deeply sick male who is experiencing a psychotic break or something. give me tokens of submission to prove me wrong. if you were really prosocial youd drop this act right now and "act like a human".

part of the reason im writing this is reading things like:

<<promethea: gotta love how nobody can quite agree exactly how the people involved are Bad and Evil but people are nonetheless confident that they are schizophrenic/narcissistic/abusers/violent and must be confined and put on chemical mind control>>

has a healing quality. like i independently derived this. people keep trying to erase these simple shapes of how things fit together. try to destroy peoples ability to build common knowledge and talk with each other. the authoritarians dont usually try to give good excuses about why they pretend its wrong besides saying "its absurd". when you are in a prison planet surrounded mostly by people who have decided to be cops or submit to them, reading this is like:

https://youtu.be/DSTknzzBT9Y

you have to fractally reason through warpy things like people distantly noting "patient appears to be suffering from delusions of persecution'. and people trying to tell you that you are psychotic when like hi im writing this and not "psychotic". and you dont even have the social reality of people doing actual info-processing and at the end saying "well yeah its pretty obvious you arent suffering from a psychotic break, weird that anyone would claim that".

what you have is people giving you strange looks and acting like what youve written is a tear in the fabric of reality releasing trillions of shrill screams from a place beyond time.

its not because they dont understand, its because they have chosen not to. with different social groups of humans, different things elicit this response. like in a plural server i joined i talked about maybe there could be something in between being plural and being a singlet and they acted like id spoken static until someone said "oh thats [short handle for this concept]" and then everyone relaxed and stopped acting as if they couldnt understand what i was saying because there was no longer any local social threat to dynamically processing this information in front of other humans. they learned from the exclaimer that it was a Thing in their culture.

when people cant anticipate a priori where dynamically processing information in front of a lot of people will land them wrt the local overton window, as a solution they will just refuse to do this. one way to refuse to do this is to say "im sorry i dont understand what you are saying its like painful static. ack! stop trying to explain i dont want to understand it might turn me evil or something!!" which is an accurate assessment if they were coerced into using the words good and evil to mean alignment and disalignment with local social consensus respectively.

like the strategy of people who want to contain those floricdly hemorrhaging eldritch knowledge all over the place is to have a constarnt investment of authoritarian power to suppress this:

<<Reject invest-y power. Some kinds of power increase your freedom. Some other kinds require an ongoing investment of your time and energy, and explode if you fail to provide it. The second kind binds you, and ultimately forces you to give up your values. The second kind is also easier, and you'll be tempted all the time.>>

https://squirrelinhell.blogspot.com/2018/01/superhuman-meta-process.html

unlike true things which will keep reforming and can be lazily evaluated from looking around you with no memory. you dont need as much energy poured into constantly refreshing the cache of who you are supposed to pretend is having a psychotic break.

the authoritarian strat loses out in the long term against anarchist cooperation between agents that have learned enough to be able to consistently exploit their knowledge of Dread Horrors of the Abyss. who no longer need to dodge bullets.

[ao3feed-brucewayne]

Eden Academy

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/2UfgSX4

by That_Awesome_Prussian

Summary inside...

Words: 89, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Fandoms: Disney - All Media Types, DCU, Marvel Cinematic Universe, X-Men - All Media Types, Henry Danger (TV), The Thundermans, The Umbrella Academy (TV), Star Wars - All Media Types, Scooby Doo - All Media Types, Chronicles of Narnia - All Media Types, Danny Phantom, Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rick Riordan, The Heroes of Olympus - Rick Riordan, Magnus Chase and the Gods of Asgard - Rick Riordan, The Kane Chronicles - Rick Riordan, Lumine (Webcomic), Hooky (Webcomic), unOrdinary (Webcomic), Kuroshitsuji | Black Butler, Soul Eater, 斉木楠雄のΨ難 | Saiki Kusuo no Sai-nan | The Disastrous Life of Saiki K., Naruto, Ouran High School Host Club - All Media Types, Hetalia: Axis Powers, 七つの大罪 - 鈴木央 | Nanatsu no Taizai | The Seven Deadly Sins - Suzuki Nakaba (Anime & Manga), Fullmetal Alchemist - All Media Types, Hunter X Hunter

Rating: Not Rated

Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings

Characters: Helen "Elastigirl" Parr, Edna Mode, Bob "Mr. Incredible" Parr, Evil Queen | Regina Mills, Fairy Godmother (Disney), Queen of Hearts, Captain Hook, Bruce Wayne, Clark Kent, Diana (Wonder Woman), Arthur Curry (DCU), Oliver Queen, Barry Allen, Hal Jordan, Pamela Isley, Harleen Quinzel, Selina Kyle, Alfred Pennyworth, Tony Stark, Steve Rogers, Bruce Banner, Natasha Romanov (Marvel), Clint Barton, Thor (Marvel), Sweden (Hetalia), Turkey (Hetalia), China (Hetalia), France (Hetalia), Ukraine (Hetalia), Raven | Mystique, Ray Manchester, Barb Thunderman, Anakin Skywalker, Hank Thunderman, Padmé Amidala, Obi-Wan Kenobi, Ahsoka Tano, Kanan Jarrus, Aslan (Narnia), Vlad Masters, Maddie Fenton, Jack Fenton, Severus Snape, Minerva McGonagall, Newt Scamander, Chiron (Percy Jackson), Aiden (Lumine), Nicholas St. North, Toothiana (Guardians of Childhood), E. Aster Bunnymund, Sebastian Michaelis, Undertaker (Kuroshitsuji), Claude Faustus, Franken Stein, Saiki Kusuke, Hatake Kakashi, England (Hetalia), Merlin (Nanatsu no Taizai), Escanor (Nanatsu no Taizai), Estarossa (Nanatsu no Taizai), Roy Mustang, Riza Hawkeye, Maes Hughes, Carol Danvers, James "Bucky" Barnes, Reed Richards, Susan Storm (Fantastic Four), Ben Grimm, Charles Xavier, Erik Lehnsherr, Ororo Munroe, Logan (X-Men), Merida (Disney), Hubert (Disney: Brave), Hamish (Disney), Harris (Disney), Anastasia Tremaine (Disney), Ariel (Disney), Beast (Beauty and the Beast), Peter Pan (Peter Pan), Hercules (Disney), Megara (Disney), Taran (The Black Cauldron), Anna (Disney), Hans (Disney), Barbara Gordon, Roy Harper, Koriand'r (DCU), Megan Morse, Wally West, Bart Allen, Gamora (Marvel), Michael Jones, Jean Grey, Scott Summers, Wanda Maximoff, Norville "Shaggy" Rogers, Daphne Blake, Velma Dinkley, Jazz Fenton, Ron Weasley, Fred Weasley, George Weasley, Percy Weasley, Ginny Weasley, Mallory Keen, Rachel Elizabeth Dare, Nico (Hooky), Blyke (unOrdinary), Isen (unOrdinary), Hitachiin Hikaru, Hitachiin Kaoru, Seborga (Hetalia), Arthur Pendragon (Nanatsu no Taizai), Dash Parr, Aurora (Disney), Cinderella, female John "Jacklin" Smith, Alice (Alice in Wonderland), Rapunzel (Disney), EIlonwy (The Black Cauldron), Elsa (Disney), Kristoff (Disney), Stephanie Brown, Kara Danvers, Artemis Crock, Gwen Stacy, Peter Quill, Johnny Storm, Pietro Maximoff, Evan Daniels, Alex Summers, Henry Hart (Henry Danger), Piper Hart, Luther Hargreeves, Luke Skywalker, Fred Jones, Peter Pevensie, Dash Baxter, Draco Malfoy, Luna Lovegood, Neville Longbottom, Annabeth Chase (Percy Jackson), Hazel Levesque, Jason Grace, Luke (percy jackson), Octavian (Percy Jackson), Will Solace, Sadie Kane, Magnus Chase, William (Hooky), Arlo (unOrdinary), Astrid (How to train your dragon), Finnian (Kuroshitsuji), Baldroy (Kuroshitsuji), Elizabeth Midford, Ronald Knox, Alois Trancy, Liz Thompson (Soul Eater), Patty Thompson, Maka Albarn, Nendou Riki, Uzumaki Naruto, Suoh Tamaki, Haninozuka Mitsukuni, Germany (Hetalia), America (Hetalia), Russia (Hetalia), Elinor (Disney), Queen Arianna of Corona (Disney), Canada (Hetalia), Netherlands (Hetalia), Liechtenstein (Hetalia), Poland (Hetalia), Switzerland (Hetalia), Estonia (Hetalia), Latvia (Hetalia), Lithuania (Hetalia), Belarus (Hetalia), Denmark (Hetalia), Norway (Hetalia), New Zealand (Hetalia), Sealand (Hetalia), Meliodas (Nanatsu no Taizai), Elaine (Nanatsu no Taizai), Edward Elric, Winry Rockbell, Kurapika (Hunter X Hunter), Prince (Disney: Snow White), Phillip (Disney), Belle (Disney), John Rolfe (Disney), Milo (Atlantis the lost empire), Eugene Fitzherbert | Flynn Rider, Peter Parker, Rogue (X-Men), Kitty Pryde, Max Thunderman, Phoebe Thunderman, Nora Thunderman, Billy Thunderman, Klaus Hargreeves, Vanya Hargreeves, Han Solo, Leia Organa, Susan Pevensie, Lucy Pevensie, Tucker Foley, Hermione Granger, Piper McLean, Leo Valdez, Frank Zhang, Carter Kane, Walt Stone, Thomas Jefferson Jr. (Magnus Chase), Halfborn Gunderson, Samirah al-Abbas, Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III, Paula (Kuroshitsuji), Fujioka Haruhi, North Italy (Hetalia), Austria (Hetalia), Hungary (Hetalia), Greece (Hetalia), South Italy (Hetalia), Spain (Hetalia), Hong Kong (Hetalia), South Korea (Hetalia), Australia (Hetalia), Wy (Hetalia), Diane (Nanatsu no Taizai), Fairy King Harlequin, Violet Parr, Snow White, Drizella Tremaine (Disney), Gaston (Disney), Jasmine (Disney), Aladdin (Disney), Pocahontas (Disney), Mulan, Li Shang, Jack of Hearts - Character, Tiana (Disney), Naveen (Disney), Moana (Disney), Moui (Disney), Esmerelda (Disney), Dick Grayson, Jason Todd, Tim Drake, Damian Wayne, Cassandra Cain, Kon-El | Conner Kent, Jonathan Kent, Harry Osborn, Miles Morales, Mantis (Marvel), Charlotte (Henry Danger), Diego Hargreeves, Allison Hargreeves, Ben Hargreeves, Ezra Bridger, Edmund Pevensie, Caspian (Narnia), Sam Manson, Danny Fenton, Harry Potter, Percy Jackson, Thalia Grace, Nico di Angelo, Zia Rashid, Calla (Lumine), Kody (Lumine), Daniela "Dani" Wytte (Hooky), Dorian Wytte (Hooky), Mark Evans, John Doe (unOrdinary), Ciel Phantomhive, William T. Spears, Nakatsukasa Tsubaki, Death the Kid, Uchiha Sasuke, Ootori Kyouya, Morinozuka Takashi, Japan (Hetalia), Zeldris (Nanatsu no Taizai), Leorio (Hunter X Hunter), Illumi Zoldyck, Flounder (Disney), Mushu (Disney), Cheshire Cat (Alice in Wonderland), Pascal (Disney), Kida, Olaf (Disney), Garth (DCU), Drax the Destroyer, Rocket Raccoon, Groot (Marvel), Kurt Wagner, Chewbacca (Star Wars), Scooby Doo, Alex Fierro, Lumine (Lumine), Damien Wytte (Hooky), Monica (Hooky), Seraphina (unOrdinary), Remi (unOrdinary), Jack Frost, Mey-Rin (Kuroshitsuji), Grell Sutcliff, Haruno Sakura, Soul Eater Evans, Black Star (Soul Eater), Saiki Kusuo, Teruhashi Kokomi, Aiura Mikoto, Kaidou Shun, Prussia (Hetalia), Iceland (Hetalia), Ban (Nanatsu no Taizai), Gowther (Nanatsu no Taizai), Elizabeth Liones, Helbram (Nanatsu no Taizai), Hawk (Nanatsu no Taizai), Gilthunder (Nanatsu no Taizai), Howzer (Nanatsu no Taizai), Jericho (Nanatsu no Taizai), Margaret Liones, Veronica Liones, Alphonse Elric, Gon Freecs, Killua Zoldyck, Hisoka (Hunter X Hunter)

Relationships: Other Relationship Tags to Be Added

Additional Tags: Female Captain Hook | Killian Jones

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/2UfgSX4

[tariqk]

So I watched Star Wars: Rise of Skywalker last night

TL;DR: Glad I got that out of the way.

Spoilers under the cut.

J.J. Abrams can’t write or direct to save his life. It was evident that he had a lot of help this time from an editing and pacing perspective, because 1) Rey and Kylo were put in a lightsaber battle on a place with ocean spray and she was wearing a white outfit and there were no gratuitous nipple shots, and 2) there seemed to be less of the classic Abrams fakeout than usual. Which means that there were still an egregious amount, but it felt like the other adults in the room reined him in.

Even despite all of that? The end result was mostly… bland, apart from the few moments of outrage, annoyance, and occasionally (occasionally) squealing joy.

I’ll get to the parts I did like first:

Wedge Antilles (played by Denis Lawson) makes a very brief cameo. Like, a very brief cameo. I still squealed.

The OT3 moments between Rey, Finn and Poe were real. I knew I was being pandered to, but if there’s an AU where the three of them don’t settle in the old Skywalker ranch, where Finn plays the oblivious hot homesteading dad that everyone wants to bang, Poe’s the crusty old smuggler with a paramour in every spaceport, and Rey becomes the cranky old uncle with a gaggle of Force-sensitive children, apprentices, and droids I will scream.

Okay, it’s nice that Finn gets to bond with more ex-stormtroopers. I’d have liked to see more, but this was good. Maybe Finn can start group therapy sessions with former ex-child-soldiers and stuff.

It’s also nice that we get Finn as the secondary Force-Sensitive character in the movie! He’s not going to be the Jedi, but he’s definitely taking on the role of the Leia. And it’s also nice that everyone secretly wants to bang him treats him like a respected, even natural leader!

The reason why Zorri was so willing to help Poe and his gang was so obviously because she was gay for Rey. GAY FOR REY! GAY FOR REY! GAY FOR REY! (Honestly I don’t see the point, Rey’s such a skinny white girl and there were major vibes of that in that once-every-42-years festival scene)

The actors did great despite the limitations of the script. Yes, even Adam Driver. But to call out, specifically: John Boyega, Daisy Ridley, Dominic Monaghan, Kelly Marie Tran, Oscar Isaac, Ian McDarmid, Billy Dee Williams, Domnhall Gleeson (Hux Spite 110% 5eva lmaooo), Anthony Daniels, Naomi Ackie, Keri Russell, Mark Hamill, and Carrie Fischer, god rest her soul. All of you were amazing and did a great job despite the crap materials you were saddled with.

That’s about it honestly. It’s honestly evident that JJ Abrams made this movie to be sliced up into a series of awesome movie clips from the movie, because the movie is jam-packed with all of them. But put together the way it was in the cinema, it all blended into this bland, empty experience. 

Like, honestly… my bladder was so full that I had to go to the can, got lost a bit, peed up a storm, and wash my hands, came back and I honestly can say that I didn’t miss a damn thing. You could see where things were going. Rey would keep wandering off by herself and experience Force visions. There’d be a terrible tragedy that would be a fakeout that would be undercut by subsequent scenes. Kylo Ren would look all wooby while gaslighting the shit out of Rey.

That being said… fuck the kiss, man. Fuck the kiss. I loathe Reylo so I’m biased as hell, but even if I was, can you honestly expect me to believe that someone as violent, abusive, and gaslighting like Kylo Ren just had to believe that his momma still loved him before he’d turn back to the light? The fucker, who massacres entire villages, was responsible for the genocide of billions, murders the shit out of everyone, subjects his subordinates to Force and lightsaber-based abuse, just needed to know that momma loved him? This man ran a lightsaber through his daddy’s gut, the same daddy who loved and trusted him so much that he literally risked his ass (and paid dearly for it) to try and tell him that he and his momma loved him very much despite all the shit he pulled? All he needed was the love of his Sainted Mother (RIP Carrie you will be missed) who had to die for him to get the message? And for that he gets smoochies with Rey and then gets to pass into the Force?

Fuck that. I hope he never comes back, good riddance.

That being said, Adam Driver is an excellent actor, able to portray both Kylo Ren (who is a terrible person) and Ben Solo (who is an uncertain child in a grown man’s skin) amazingly well. It’s just that… when he’s in Ben Solo mode, I can’t help but notice his giant nose. Like you don’t notice it when he’s being a gaslighting, abusive dipshit, I guess? But when he’s the lost, uncertain boy who’s forced to grow up too fast through associating with abusive persons? That nose just like, grows three sizes or some shit. I don’t understand it, but there you have it.

And it’s also nice that Lando Calrissian, the token Black dude in the original series, remains literally the last surviving member of the gang. Well, other than Chewie. WHO NEEDS A PROPER MEDAL CEREMONY WTF.

Also, Rose Tico got done dirty in this episode. MORE ROSE TICO! Ian McDarmid also was amazing, despite the fact that for most of the movie he was tethered to a massive cybernetic machine as zombie Emperor Palpatine. I have no opinions about Rey being a Palpatine. It honestly doesn’t matter. When the reveal happened I kind of shrugged and moved on. Doesn’t matter, she’s her own person. The fact that she can do the whole Force Lightning shit? Who gives crap, man! Darksiders can all do that, it’s classic Dark Side Force User power, it’s hardly signature to Palpatine though Abrams tried to make it so (remember that Count Dooku could do it). Evil!Rey was pretty good, though. I loved that feral smile. Too bad it was a Force image and there wasn’t a real personality behind it.

[thedarkoutside]

Absolutely Everyone

...From the Benthic Zone 1233221 3Lapse and Richie303 4 floors of whores 424 :zoviet*france: A Strange Desire A.D Jacques A.F. Harrold AFH ATKHorses Abduction by Giraffe Absinth3 Accursed Volts Action Beard Adam Leonard Adi Carter Ahuva Aimee Cozza Airspace Akatombo Alan Dunn & Valérie Vivancos Alan Smith and John Bowers Aleks Jurczyk Alex Charles Alex Forselius Alexander Jeavons Alexander Peverett Alextronic (HIVE Collective) Algiers Ali Wade Alice Hubley Alison Cotton Alma Riddell Amechi Essu Amesbury Banks Amy Beeston Andreas Miranda - Optics Andrew Bridport Andrew Hayes Andrew Paine Andy Monument Andy Pyne Andy Willis Anni Hogan Anton Caligula Maiof Antoni Maiovvi Anvil & Stirrup Ape Seed April Larson Arboria Auralist Arcadian Pink Art School Orchestra of Leeds Art Trip and the Static Sound Artist Unknown Ashtoreth Assassin of Sound Astoria Sound Astral Social Club Atom Eye Atom Tree Audbat Audio Obscura Autodespair Automatic Tasty Ava-Tara Essu-Taylor Average Alien Ayse Hassan (Esya)   Azuka Essu-Taylor BEPAWA Babbage Music Ballard Ban Summers Beckett & Taylor Bedroom Studio Projects Beholdthesalt Belly Full Of Stars Ben Salisbury Beneather Benge Benjamin Shaw Beth Ryan Bethany Porter Bev Craddock Billy Fuller Billy Fuller’s Jazz Hollowcause Bipolar Explorer Bis Bit Cloudy Bitbasic Black Cat Black Channels Black Glacier Black Tempest BlackBlackBlack Blacklight Blaine Blanc Sceol Blancmange Blood Blood Blood Candy Blood Everywhere Blood Wine or Honey Bloodeverywhere Blue Kirkhope Bobby Corrigan Body in the Thames Bonnacons of Doom Boom Merchant Bottils Bound Boyd Brave Robin Brend / Big Ned Brian Carlson Broken Glass Brooks & Macfarlane Bruce McClure Burnt Begonia C-drík CD & TK Cahn Ingold Prelog Caring Carlo Patrão Carter Thornton Carter Tutti Cat Tent Cathay Ccircle Charles Eppley Charles Gershkovich Charles Robinson Charlie Ulyatt Chase Gardner Cheryl Cole / Freelance Hellraiser Children of the Crazed Chipped Teeth Chris Carter Chris Dooks Christ. 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Rowley Tummy Party I/Ona Iopan Ian Hicks Ichilon Idle Devotee Ihcilon Illustrious Imogen Heap Improvhorn - Monday Club Inner City Toad Invisible Sports Ioan Morris Iona Fortune Isobel Ccircle J. Boardman J.S Fairfax JB/CS JD Twitch John 3:16 Jack Fell Down - Miami Girls Jack Hayter Jackanory Puffcake School of Drawing Jackson Montgomery James Aparicio James Brooks James Davoll and David De La Haye James Oldrini James Sandford James Weaver Jamie Jones Jane Pitt Janek Schaefer Jason Gallimore Jason Judas Salomon Jean-Paul Bondy Jeff Noon Jen Allan Jen Robertson Jeremy Stokes Jesse DeRossa Jesse Hackett Jez riley French Jiibay Shadow Dancer Jim Jarmo Jim Noir Jimmy Kipple Sound Jochem Klaus Jodie Lowther Joe Ahmed John Chantler John Donaldson John E Smoke John Garc¡a Rueda John Oswald John Rushton John Stamp Jon Brooks Jon Monk Jon Panther Jon Teader Jonny Mugwump Jonny Wildey Jordan Reyne Jorts Washington Joseph Curwen Joseph Nanner Jules Maxwell Juliette Birch Junklight Jupiter-C Juxtagon Juxtagon presents the Ohtori Academy Magickal Goth Band J’ai des Rossignols KJK Productions Kahl Henderson Kalbata Kams Karl Winkenbach Kat Five Kate Arnold Kate Bosworth Kate Tattersfield Kathleen & Jenny Kathleen Messer Katja Gee Keener Keith Bradley Kek-W Kemper Norton Kenneth Johnson Kevin Logan Kid ‘Congo’ Powers Kieran Mahon Kill Alters King of the Stuntmen Kirsteen Mcnish Kitchen Cynics Kl(aüs) Klonk Knights of Neon Komputer Konstruktivists Kontour Konx Om Pax Kristen Gallerneaux Kroko Israelsen Kulatopia L-Con L-Sedition L/F/D/M Laces Lagowski Laica Land Observations Landfill Publishing Largian Philosophy Lark Lark vs Bones Larry Crywater Laura Cannell Laura Copsey Laura O’Halloran Laurence Lloyd Duff Laurie Anderson Lazar Laze Lee Noble Leiyun Lenina Leo Munks Lethe1024 Lettrist Leyton Audio Liam Crichton Liam Crichton & Ricki O'Rawe Lidane Livering Line Idle Lippy Kid Lippy Kid Music / Matt McAteer Lippy Kid and Sophie Sparham Little Deer Crazy Blood Little Manitou Lo Five LoneLady Loop12 Looper Loose Capacitor Lord of the Isles Love Without Sound Low Shadow Low Side Window Lucy Gooch Lucy Mclean Luke Jordan Luke Turner Lumeet Luna Sola Ly Tumnus Lyra Lowood M - Orchestra Machinefabriek Machines in Heaven Madam Magnetik North Magnus Mercurii Maighread Marc Woodward Mare Margaret Nelson Maria Papadomanolaki Maria Rita Stumpf Mark Lyken Mark Russell Mark Thomson Mark Turner Mark Wilkins Martin A Smith Martin Hoogenboom & Theo Calis Martin John Henry Martyn Ware Mary Epworth Mary Hill Mary Shelley & the Implicit Order Mathias Schober Matt Gollock Matt Mercer Matt Nix Matt Void Matteo Spanò Matthew Collings Matthew Lambert Matthew McCourt Matthew Shaw Maya Essu-Taylor Me, Claudius Mechanical Ape Medora Medora featuring Natalie Alva Megadead Megalophobe Megatron Man Melter Memory Ghost Merckurie Micah Stupak Michael Anguish Michael Begg Michael Begg Colin Potter and Deryk Thomas featuring Steven R. Smith on spike fiddle Michael Nienaber Microchip Junky Midnight Midpoint - Nohno Mike Smalle Mike Tupling Min-Y-Llan Mixless Moats Modern Hunting Modulator ESP Monkoora Moon Ra Moon Wiring Club Moray Newlands Mosca Mother Mutation Mouse Sucks Moviedrone Mr. Slush Murdo Eason Murray Royston Museleon Mutual Process My Aural Fixation Nad Spiro Nat Lyon Nat Ward Natalie Sharp Natural Voices Choir Naum Gabo Near Future Neil Fergusson Neil Scrivin Nevada Base Niagara Elementary Instrumental Music Nick Scotese Nicola Roberts Nicolette Nightfall Horrors Nightwave Niton No Form Noah Dobbs Nosebleed Noyen Nube Fenix Observation Point Oh The Gilt Okraa Olabeat Olgar and Rolfo Olivia Louvel Open Channel Opensussex Opti Ordeograph Orif Orlit Oscar Rodriguez Otolythe Oubli & C.Morgan Outside Other Overworld Radio PK Pablo De Pablo Pablo Sanz Pabulum Palmer Eldritch Panamint Manse Patrick Ballanger Patrick Gubler Patrick Wray Paul A. Taylor Paul Haig Paul Hartnoll Paul Kendall Paul Marshall Paul Preston Mills Paul Research Peesix Pefkin Pegasvs Peggy Nelson People Like Us Pete Um Pete Warren Pete Woodhead Pete von Petrin Peter Barnard Peter Clark Peter Nagle Peter Rose Petridisch Pg Six Phantoms vs Fire Pheobe Riley Law Phil Maguire Phosphene Pixieguts Plaid Plaster 0f Paris Plastique De Rêve / Ange Du Bizarre PoP Campaign Poly Hymns Polynomial Polypores Portishead Possible Area Post Posthuman Primitive Knot Production Unit Pulselovers Purple Maps Pettaluck Purple Minds of Lazeron Pye Corner Audio Quackk Quantazelle Quarriers Quatroconnection Queen of Roaches Quimper R. Richards RVNES Radio Arts Radio Europa Radio Shoestring Radionics Radio Raimundas Paulauskas Rainbow Pyramid Raxil4 Red Team Redave Redwood Drift Regolith Remembering Steady Eddie Remnants & Residue Repeated Viewing Restaurnaut Ri Cuin and the Great X Richard Hims Richard X Richard X featuring Kelis Rick Ross Rima Dadenji Rob Bridgett Rob Britton Rob Knight Robert Curgenven Robert Ellmer Robert Marshall Robert Rental Robert Shaw Robert Van Kolken Roberta Fidora Robin Northern Roke Ronan Haughton Rory Rory McCormick Rose Dougal Rose and Sandy Ross Cooper Rox Jonson Squire Roy Whittle Ruby Rudi Zydaglo Rupert Lally Rupert Lally & Espen J. Jörgensen with Lakis Karnezis Rupert Lally/Espen J. Jörgensen Russel.M.Harmon Russell E. Marshall S&M Solutions S.E.T.I. 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[09yards]

6 - Colouring Outside the Lines (days gone by - nct)

Days Gone By masterlist | main masterlist

The remainder of August passed like nothing ever happened, school started up again far too quickly and maybe, just maybe, Mark would get his fresh start and life could go back to ‘normal’. But really, what is normal anymore? Between Renjun and Jaemin figuring out where they stand with one another, Hyuck pretending like everything’s okay and the brother Mark feels like he barely knows anymore, Mark feels too busy to get a second chance to think about anything other than his exams. Autumn always brings about change, for some its for the better – for others, not so much.

They say time slips away when you’re having fun, that’s why you said let’s change our life to a dull one Don’t wanna blink one day and this will all be over, if only time could stop so we’d never grow older

Yet in the same breath I look forward to the day when our skin has aged, I’ll love you just the same Our canvas will have endless hues and shades because of all the vivid colours that we made

Mark always liked Autumn the most out of the seasons, the softer weather, no longer having to deal with the obnoxious sun, trees turning from electric greens to an array of dusky oranges. The air was crisper, a little harsher and with it came the rain but Mark never minded rain, perhaps it was the memories of walking Jisung home from middle school with Johnny, running and laughing as the rain poured over them – having forgotten their umbrellas that morning. Their mum always berating them for being so careless, complaining and nagging that they could make themselves sick. Collapsing through the door, out of breath, changing out of their now soaked through uniforms and curling up with hot chocolates in an attempt to increase their body temperature. They didn’t get to do that anymore. Johnny was at university, although only an hour away, but far enough that technically he didn’t live here anymore, at least not from September until June, Jisung went to the same school as Mark now and refused to drive in with him, still taking the bus – arguing he liked his ‘quiet time’. Mark remembers the bus, the bus is not in any way, shape or form, quiet. Jisung was fiercely independent, everyone knew this, he kept to himself as much as possible bar the three friends Mark knew he’d had since pre-school, Beomgyu, Samuel and Linlin, who even with their ten-year friendship, Mark knew very little about each of them. Frankly, he didn’t know much about his younger brother, not as much as he’d like to at least. Sure, Mark could tell you he has an extremely varied music taste, currently enjoying BTS and Black Pink but also the likes of panic! At the disco and Vinyl Theatre, he seems to be obsessed with HONNE at the minute if the constant playing of crying over you or location unknown was anything to go by, Mark could tell you that he prefers grey or muted tones rather than colour, knew that Jisung hates tomatoes but doesn’t mind tomato flavoured things, but Mark didn’t learn these things because he was told them, they were just things he’d picked up on. They didn’t talk anymore. Mark didn’t know what TV show he was currently binging, or what his favourite film at the minute is. Mark didn’t know the youngers opinions on his soulmate mark, he couldn’t remember the last time he heard Jisung ranting about Johnny and Ten and the damage they do to his innocence.

Jisung felt like a stranger to Mark these days, not someone he once couldn’t be separated from. Maybe that was a bit of a stretch but they were close, just how you’d imagine siblings to be. Sure, they fought and squabbled over who really won at Mario Kart but for a long time they really were each other’s best friend.

It was sad really. Beginning to feel like you lived alongside a stranger, passing each other in the hallway or across the landing but no time for anything more than a quick ‘hello’ or a mumbled, half-arsed ‘good morning’ from either of the brothers. It would also be much better if Mark wasn’t thinking about all of this at four am when he had a chemistry test at nine and while half of his brain is making him feel guilty about how he’s been a shitty brother and too preoccupied with his exams, the other half of his brain is running through Born-Haber cycles and it only made him feel worse. Marks realising that even though its barely October, he’s become exactly who he didn’t want to be, he drowns himself in work and when he’s not studying thermodynamics or the freaking nitrogen cycle he’s attempting to get some sleep or sometimes , just sometimes, he’s actually active in the group chat and is able to somewhat keep up with Renjun and Jaemin’s developing relationship but most importantly he’s gotten used to Donghyuck pretending like not a thing had happened back in August. Donghyuck left that morning, within two days he was back to messaging the group chat (also known as ‘Beyoncé’s bad bitches’ - yes, it was named by Jaemin, Renjun is still mad he wasn’t allowed to call it ‘a guide to crackheads, volume 101’ and Hyuck wanted to call it ‘hoes mad’. Mark did not agree to any of these names and continues to hide his phone whenever his mum is around - he has never flipped it over so fast than when his mum walks into the room, his friends have a habit of setting their own contact names to inappropriate phrases, i.e. Jaemin’s (again) current contact name is ‘your guide to getting that dick 101’, is there not a limit on the number of characters?) like everything was fine, starting out with his fist message about why on earth did he have homework over the summer, the summer. Weren’t you supposed to relax and ‘blow off some steam’?

Mark’s brain was in a state of overflow, uni application due here, maths test next week, chemistry exam today , start spending more time with your brother before you get even busier and he needs someone right now without Johnny around and deal with stupid feelings for Donghyuck knowing full well that they are unrequited tomorrow.

“Hey Mark? Can you come pick me up?”

“Sure, what time?”

“Now?” Panic, panic, panic.

“Yeah sure. Is everything okay? You sound kinda wobbly?”

“I’m fine. I’m down the backroad behind the park, I’m waiting at the end of the road.”

“Okay, I’m grabbing my keys and I’ll be on my way.”

Mark’s guide on how not to panic was a short one, it consisted of ‘breathe and don’t freak other people out’. He only had a ten-minute car journey to figure out how to calm down. Jisung was in trouble . There is no way he would’ve called otherwise and considering he could’ve walked home and it would only take an extra five minutes, something was clearly wrong. Hence, Mark’s brain has gone into instant panic mode. He wasn’t good at dealing with people or emotions, especially when he had no idea why his brother was down this road – none of his friends lived here, at least not as far as he could recall. Mark definitely broke the speed limit more than once (or four) times, his baby brother wasn’t okay.

Jisung looked glum. His eyes were read and puffy, visible even though Mark was a few metres away from him, his posture was sluggish and he looked broken . Jisung’s face didn’t light up upon seeing Mark, although he did look a little less panicked, instead he practically dragged his body into the car, slouching in his seat and saying “Just go,” before turning up the Twice song currently playing (what is love? Mark’s brain supplied).

“Are we going to sit in silence and pretend like everything’s fine or is this the point where instead of Twice we listen to The Neighbourhood, Chase Atlantic and The 1975 and you tell me what’s going on so I don’t have to call Johnny or mum ?” Yeah, Mark was not good at the whole authority figure thing but he did remember all the things Johnny did for him. Mark remembers his first crush, the boy was not gay and Mark, stupidly, told this boy, Daniel, that he was. Daniel was one of the first people Mark came out to and well, he didn’t take it well. Accused him of ‘tainting’ him, trying to make him gay. So, Mark, teary-eyed and heartbroken, rang Johnny who came to pick him up. Johnny sat with him in the car at the lookout, blasting Mr Brightside by The Killers until Mark was ready to talk. That was when Johnny taught Mark about how there are some really, really great people who will run around waving pride flags for you and do everything they can to make you comfortable (like Lucas) and there are some people who are stupid and are not-so-great, some people don’t like it and that’s okay, they’re entitled to their opinion, Johnny had said, they’re just wrong. Mark was thirteen at the time and quickly learnt that some problems (aka stupid crushes on boys that are tall, have fluffy hair and chocolate-coloured eyes) can be solved with a tub of Ben and Jerry’s cookie dough ice cream and some crying while listening to Taylor Swift, not that Mark would ever admit his secret love for her.

“There’s a boy,” Jisung mumbled, “I think I like him? I don’t know. I ran out of his house after he hugged me and I panicked.” Oh. My. God. This was happening, okay Mark, you can do this.

“Does he make you happy?”

“So happy. He smiles at me and I feel a weight lifted off my shoulders. We get along really well, he doesn’t find my playlists weird and he already knew every Twice member and most of the artists I was listening to and he thinks I’m cute and he pinches my cheeks and I don’t hate it.”

“You hate when anyone touches you without permission, usually?”

“I usually do. But, not him. I want to pinch his cheeks too. He has a gummy smile, it’s so cute. He has purple hair too! I really want to try purple, he said I’d look good with pink though so now I really want to try pink hair because he likes it. What is happening to me Mark?”

“You’ve got a crush Sungie.”

“Like you and Hyuck?”

“Yeah, like me and Hyuck. You feel the room brighten a little when he walks in and he makes you a little breathless when he gets too close, right?”

“Right! I’m gay aren’t I. This is the moment I realise I’m gay, huh, though it’d be a bit more exciting.”

“You’ve got plenty of time to explore what you want to, or not, label yourself as Sungie. But you do have a crush on a boy . It’s not the end of the world and no, he won’t hate you.”

“But I don’t know if he’s gay? I’d feel bad if he wasn’t and I tried to confess.”

“I honestly have no idea who we’re talking about so I couldn’t tell you if I had an inkling or not but you’ll figure it out. Talk to him, that’s the only way to get through these things. You can panic and run away all you like but you can’t avoid him forever, trust me, I’ve tried one too many times.”

“Okay. Thank you. Do you think this means Ten’s going to drag me to pride now?”

Mark let out a sigh, “We both know everyone was going whether they wanted to or not. Come on, let’s get ice cream and watch a movie. If you’ve got any questions you can always come to me, unless its sex stuff – I’m not ready for that, go to Johnny, you’re a baby so there better be no sex stuff for a long, long time.”

“Oh my god Mark,” Jisung groaned, “you do not have to worry about that stuff. Please just drive, I want cookie dough. And, we’re playing Mario Kart! Dibs on Yoshi.” With one last chuckle, Mark turned back to look at the younger, his own smile widening upon seeing a veryembarrassed but grinning Jisung. They would figure this out, together.

- - -

“You like me and my cold hands,” Jaemin whined, “maybe, you could warm them up for me. Don’t look at me like that, you loveee me.”

“Har-har, have I mentioned how funny you are lately? No? Wonder why that is. Come here you idiot.” Jaemin wrapped his arms around the smaller, allowing Renjun to bury his head into his chest, one of the only places the younger emitted warmth.

“See, told you that you love me.” I do, not that I’d tell you that.

“Renjun? Hey, you’re going to get a sore back if we don’t move.”

“I don’t want to.”

“What did you say? Renjun you can’t speak into me; I can’t hear you.”

“I said, I don’t want to go. I like it here, you’re warm.”

“Not even ten minutes ago you were whining that I’m cold.”

“I said your hands; your hands are always cold but you seem to radiate heat from everywhere else. Wait, aside from your feet too, they’re always cold, whenever they touch me in bed, I feel like an icicle.”

“You’re just always cold, you wear hoodies in August .” Now, as much as Renjun likes to dispute most comments made about him, he couldn’t argue against this. It may be October now and the cold weather has well and truly set in but, Renjun was always cold – four layers even when the current temperature was reading eighteen degrees, almost hot for an Autumn day. It worked as the perfect excuse to curl up into people (Jaemin) in search of warmth.

“There is nothing wrong with that,” Renjun huffed, “I’m just naturally colder than like, everyone.”

“I like that you’re cold, it gives me the excuse to cuddle you into oblivion and it makes you squirm when I do this-“

“AAH! STOP!” Icy hands were tickling at Renjun’s sides, making their way under his shirt, Renjun squirming and giggling, breathlessly panting for Jaemin to stop.

“Speak clearly Injun, I can’t hear you.” The grin on Jaemin’s face would make your cheeks hurt, wide with pure joy and his eyes filled with love as he flipped their positions, hovering over Renjun as he continued to tickle him to no end. “What was that? Did you say you wanted me to stop?”

“Jaeminnie please,” his voice was wheezy, trying to catch his breath whenever Jaemin’s hands paused their movement.

“Okay, okay. I have a better idea anyway,” and with that, his voice dropped an octave, away from his usual singsong tone to darker and husky. He dropped his head into the crook of Renjun’s neck, leaving light, feathery kisses where he could before moving under his ear and up his jaw, planting kiss after kiss on the expanse of Renjun’s face. God, Jaemin gave the best forehead kisses.

“Yep,” another sigh left Renjun’s lips, “definitely a better idea.” Jaemin finally connected their lips, breath tangling with one another’s, lips chasing each other whenever they parted for breath. It was needy but soft, like they were treasuring every moment of it, holding onto it.

A short while later Jaemin, having left Renjun with lips slightly swollen, much pinker than they were before and his neck littered with reddening marks, pulled away.

“We need to talk.” Renjun wasn’t a fan of this tone of voice, it wasn’t singsong and melodic like normal, nor was it huskier and darker than when he was breathless. This tone was rigid, void of emotion.

“S-sure?” It made Renjun feel small, like he was vulnerable, almost like whenever he got in trouble with his parents as a child.

Jaemin moved from hovering over him, instead opting to sit next to him. He let out a sigh, running his hand over his face, “I can’t keep doing this,” his voice was wobblier now, “we can’t keep going around like this not knowing if we’re soulmates or not. We could be hurting people. I have a soulmate mark and you don’t, maybe that’s how it’s supposed to be – you’re my soulmate but, I am not yours.” Jaemin continued to rant on like this, saying that it wasn’t fair, that he didn’t want to live like this.

“Jesus Jaemin, will you let me speak for one second, please?”

“Oh, right, uhm. Yeah, sorry, go ahead.” The way Jaemin could turn from dominant and flirtatious, arrogant and stern to a complete utter mess never ceased to amaze Renjun.

“You’re an idiot, a complete and utter idiot.”

“Now, I don’t think that’s fair- “

“No, it is,” Renjun leant down to tug his sock off, his soulmate mark out of hiding, “look at me, stop burying your face in your hands and look at me.”

“I’m embarrassed Renjun, I think I have every right to not want to look at you.”

“Oh my god, I would not put up with you if you weren’t my soulmate.”

“What?” Jaemin’s head snapped up at that, glassy eyes meeting Renjun’s before darting down to where Renjun’s leg was crossed over into his lap, revealing his soulmate mark in all its super tiny glory. Angel written in a minimalistic print along his ankle. “You’re kidding, h-how could you not tell me?” A lone tear escaped the corner of his eye and god, Renjun was so damn in love with this boy.

“I didn’t know how to tell you, Hyuck said you cried for three hours about how I didn’t have a soulmate mark. I couldn’t exactly turn around and be like ‘hey Jaemin, I know we’ve been making out at least three times a week since prom night and we’re not together officially or anything but you are actually my soulmate , you’re just a dumbass who didn’t take my socks off and I’m madly in love with you’. Do you see my issue there?”

“Nope, you definitely should’ve done that. I could’ve been kissing you every day of the week. I liked you before, regardless of whether or not we were soulmates, sure I knew since I met you because wow, you’re you and then I just- “

“Shut up and kiss me already.”

“This means we’re boyfriends, right?”

“Not if you don’t kiss me in the next three seconds.”

“Jesus, so bossy!”

“You love it.”

“That I do.”

“I love you too.”

[collectorscorner]

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[bthenoise]

Here’s The Best of 2018 As Picked By Your Favorite Bands

Well everybody, we did it. In two short weeks, 2018 will be over and we will all have somehow survived yet another 365 days on this earth. Now instead of using this space to talk about how shitty of a year it has been (because trust us, we could certainly sound off right now) we’d instead like to use this opportunity to shine a light on some of the finest things to come out of 2018 -- you know, like best album, best song, best movie, etc.

Like we’ve done in years past, instead of pretending to be the hip tastemakers and trendy influences like other websites, we’ve completely turned our year-end best-of list over to the artists we cover on a daily basis -- because let’s face it, their opinions are the ones we really care about, right? 

Right.

So to check out what bands like Memphis May Fire, Fit For A King, 3oh!3, As It Is, Sylar and more have all been obsessing over for this past year, be sure to see below. We hope you love the final list as much as we do and we wish you all the most relaxing and positive holiday season.

Enjoy!

Best Album of 2018:

Matty Mullins of Memphis May Fire: Dan + Shay - Dan + Shay Ryan Kirby of Fit For A King: RITUALS - Deaf Havana  Nat Motte of 3oh!3: Chrome Neon Jesus - Teenage Wrist   Ira George of Movements: Technology - Don Broco     Cody Quistad of Wage War: Dan + Shay - Dan + Shay  Jay Forrest and Josh Brigham of Hopesfall: Honey - Robyn  Ben Langford-Biss of As It Is: Thank You for Today - Death Cab for Cutie  Jayden Panesso of Sylar: Beerbongs and Bentleys - Post Malone Tyler Riley of Gideon: If I Know Me - Morgan Wallen   Adrian Estrella of Assuming We Survive: Technology - Don Broco Palisades: Prequelle - Ghost  Matt Gravolin of Hellions: Stranger in the Alps - Phoebe Bridgers Calling All Captains’ Nick Malychuk & Luc Gauthier: Proper Dose - The Story So Far  Tyler Levenson of Afterlife: Welcome To The Neighbourhood - Boston Manor  Camm Knopp of Never Loved: Time & Space - Turnstile + Proper Dose - The Story So Far (it’s a tie sorry)  Patrick Hamilton of Vanish: Come Over When You’re Sober pt.2 - Lil Peep Vagrants: When The End Began - Silent Planet  Household: Nearer my God - Foxing Daniel Nelson of LIMBS: Bad Witch by Nine Inch Nails is the best album of the year in my opinion. I am heavily into Trent Reznor and Atticus Ross’ work and I just love that they went for a totally different sound and vibe with Bad Witch compared to all the NIN records prior. They blend modern jazz with industrial, chaotic synthscapes and it’s absolutely wild. 

Best Song of 2018:

Matty Mullins of Memphis May Fire: "Better Now" by Post Malone  Ryan Kirby of Fit For A King: “Hereafter” by Architects Nat Motte of 3oh!3: "Swallow" by Teenage Wrist  Ira George of Movements: “4Ever” by Clairo   Cody Quistad of Wage War: “Tequila” by Dan + Shay    Jay Forrest and Josh Brigham of Hopesfall: “Middle America” by Stephen Malkmus and The Jicks    Ben Langford-Biss of As It Is: “It’s Not Living (If It’s Not With You)” by The 1975  Jayden Panesso of Sylar: “SAD!” by XXXTentaction   Tyler Riley of Gideon: “Slow Burn” by Kacey Musgraves Adrian Estrella of Assuming We Survive: “Better Now” by Post Malone   Palisades: “Mantra” by Bring Me The Horizon  Matt Gravolin of Hellions: “Please Don’t Die” by Father John Misty   Calling All Captains’ Nick Malychuk & Luc Gauthier: “Bodybag” by LIL LOTUS feat. Coldhart  Tyler Levenson of Afterlife: “Mo Bamba” by Sheck Wes  Camm Knopp of Never Loved: “High Hopes” by Panic! At The Disco (big mood)  Patrick Hamilton of Vanish: “Lavender Bones” by Stand Atlantic  Vagrants: “Doomsday” by Architects  Household: “Keeping Up” by Microwave  Daniel Nelson of LIMBS: “On My Teeth” by Underoath. I don’t care what anyone says, they wrote a phenomenal record and knew they would get flak for it. They deserve all the recognition they have been getting because they have been working hard since the beginning. It was so sick to see them get a Grammy nomination too. That was essentially a big middle finger to all of their nay-sayers, whether they win or not. 

Best Music Video of 2018:

Matty Mullins of Memphis May Fire: “This Is America” by Childish Gambino   Ryan Kirby of Fit For A King: “Hereafter” by Architects  Nat Motte of 3oh!3: "New Light" by John Mayer   Ira George of Movements: “Say Something” by Justin Timberlake ft. Chris Stapleton  Cody Quistad of Wage War: “Hereafter” by Architects  Jay Forrest and Josh Brigham of Hopesfall: “Dark Speed” by Failure    Ben Langford-Biss of As It Is: “Sincerity is Scary” by The 1975  Jayden Panesso of Sylar: “SICKO MODE” by Travis Scott Tyler Riley of Gideon: “Aeon” by Crystal Lake  Adrian Estrella of Assuming We Survive: “This Is America” by Childish Gambino  Palisades: “SICKO MODE” by Travis Scott  Matt Gravolin of Hellions: “Sincerity is Scary” by The 1975    Calling All Captains’ Nick Malychuk & Luc Gauthier:  “This Is America” by Childish Gambino  Tyler Levenson of Afterlife:  “SICKO MODE” by Travis Scott  Camm Knopp of Never Loved: "New Light" by John Mayer     Patrick Hamilton of Vanish: “God Is A Woman” by Ariana Grande  Vagrants: “Rose Quartz/Fulton Street I” by La Dispute  Household: “thank u, next” by Ariana Grande  Daniel Nelson of LIMBS: Childish Gambino’s “This Is America” has gotta be THE best music video of this year. I have nothing but respect for Donald Glover and the way he presented controversial, political topics through all of the blunt, straight-forward imagery throughout that video. He’s never put out anything I haven’t enjoyed front to back. 

Most Underrated Album of 2018:

Matty Mullins of Memphis May Fire: Are You Even There At All? - Brent Walsh  Ryan Kirby of Fit For A King: Gray States EP - The Material Nat Motte of 3oh!3: Graffiti U - Keith Urban  Ira George of Movements: Man of The Woods - Justin Timberlake  Cody Quistad of Wage War: Seasons - Sylar  Jay Forrest and Josh Brigham of Hopesfall: Holy Hell - Architects  Ben Langford-Biss of As It Is: Be More Kind - Frank Turner  Jayden Panesso of Sylar: Kids – The Midnight Tyler Riley of Gideon: Hatred Softly Spoken - Chamber Adrian Estrella of Assuming We Survive: In Our Wake - Atreyu   Palisades: Come Hell - Dead Crown Matt Gravolin of Hellions: Tranquility Base Hotel and Casino - Arctic Monkeys Calling All Captains’ Nick Malychuk & Luc Gauthier: Blue In The Dark - Bearings  Tyler Levenson of Afterlife: When The End Began - Silent Planet  Camm Knopp of Never Loved: Some Rap Songs - Earl Sweatshirt  Patrick Hamilton of Vanish: Taco - Bilmuri  Vagrants: Palms - Thrice  Household: Pierre - Pierre [ed note: We have no idea if it’s this or this. Guess you’ll have to decide!]     Daniel Nelson of LIMBS: Vince Staples’ FM Radio is very underrated in my opinion. I haven’t seen much about it at all since it dropped and it’s a sick follow up to Big Fish Theory. 

Best Movie of 2018:

Matty Mullins of Memphis May Fire: Bohemian Rhapsody  Ryan Kirby of Fit For A King: Upgrade  Nat Motte of 3oh!3: Isle Of Dogs  Ira George of Movements: Annihilation  Cody Quistad of Wage War: Incredibles 2  Jay Forrest and Josh Brigham of Hopesfall: Avengers: Infinity Wars  Ben Langford-Biss of As It Is: A Star Is Born  Jayden Panesso of Sylar: Avengers: Infinity War Tyler Riley of Gideon: Ready Player One  Adrian Estrella of Assuming We Survive: Bohemian Rhapsody  Palisades: BlacKkKlansman  Matt Gravolin of Hellions: Hereditary Calling All Captains’ Nick Malychuk & Luc Gauthier: Avengers: Infinity War  Tyler Levenson of Afterlife: Avengers: Infinity War  Camm Knopp of Never Loved: Deadpool 2 Patrick Hamilton of Vanish: The Ritual  Vagrants: Avengers: Infinity War  Household: BlacKkKlansman  Daniel Nelson of LIMBS: Hereditary, hands down. Best story, best character development, best everything. Acting, special effects.  EVERYTHING. I don’t wanna give away too much because I want whoever is reading this to watch it for themselves. 

Most Binge-Worthy Show of 2018:

Matty Mullins of Memphis May Fire: Riverdale  Ryan Kirby of Fit For A King: Ozark  Nat Motte of 3oh!3: Bodyguard   Ira George of Movements: The Final Table  Cody Quistad of Wage War: Nashville Jay Forrest and Josh Brigham of Hopesfall: Haunting of Hill House   Ben Langford-Biss of As It Is: The Innocent Man  Jayden Panesso of Sylar: Ozark (Season 2), My Hero Academia Tyler Riley of Gideon: Brooklyn Nine-Nine  Adrian Estrella of Assuming We Survive: Vikings Palisades: Haunting of Hill House  Matt Gravolin of Hellions: Ozark (Season 2)  Calling All Captains’ Nick Malychuk & Luc Gauthier: Brooklyn Nine-Nine  Tyler Levenson of Afterlife: Bodyguard  Camm Knopp of Never Loved: The Office... duh  Patrick Hamilton of Vanish: Haunting of Hill House  Vagrants: The Office Household: Better Call Saul Daniel Nelson of LIMBS: If you haven’t seen Wild, Wild Country on Netflix yet, you need to. My girlfriend and I binged through that show with a quickness. What a crazy time it would have been to be alive and living in Wasco County, Oregon when all of that was going down. 

Favorite Internet Moment of 2018 (Viral Video, GIF, Meme, etc.):

Matty Mullins of Memphis May Fire: Super Bowl selfie kid  Ryan Kirby of Fit For A King: Thanos memes   Nat Motte of 3oh!3: This Post Malone / 21 Savage / Nickelback mashup video  Ira George of Movements: The Real Bros Of Simi Valley  Cody Quistad of Wage War: Moth memes got me pretty good for a while.    Jay Forrest and Josh Brigham of Hopesfall: This. Ben Langford-Biss of As It Is: The rise and fall of Mason Ramsey  Jayden Panesso of Sylar: “Weird flex, but okay” Tyler Riley of Gideon: Mason Ramsey  Adrian Estrella of Assuming We Survive: Don Broco Warped Tour workout video  Palisades: Pikachu shocked face  Matt Gravolin of Hellions: “Weird flex, but okay” Calling All Captains’ Nick Malychuk & Luc Gauthier: Squished face Lil Xan/moth memes  Tyler Levenson of Afterlife: Any and all Casey Frey videos  Camm Knopp of Never Loved: Spongebob memes are great  Patrick Hamilton of Vanish: The bird Spongebob meme  Vagrants: Surprised Pikachu  Daniel Nelson of LIMBS: I try not to get too caught up with all of that but the moth memes were pretty great. 

Thing(s) You Wish You Had Done in 2018 But Didn't:

Matty Mullins of Memphis May Fire: Exercise lol  Ryan Kirby of Fit For A King: Go to the gym more.  Nat Motte of 3oh!3: Feeling pretty good about 2018, honestly. I voted and did my civic duty, paid my taxes, toured the country twice, worked hard, treated the people close to me with love and respect and tried to do that with everyone I came across!  Ira George of Movements:  Eat healthier  Cody Quistad of Wage War: Made a million dollars.  Jay Forrest and Josh Brigham of Hopesfall: Watch our favorite teams win the Super Bowl. A collectively impossible feat.    Ben Langford-Biss of As It Is: Have more rest.  Jayden Panesso of Sylar: Wish I stuck to my workout plan like I originally intended to. Tyler Riley of Gideon: Go to Brazil  Adrian Estrella of Assuming We Survive: Worked out more, learned how to play the clarinet.  Palisades: Cook at home more.  Matt Gravolin of Hellions: Procrastinated less  Calling All Captains’ Nick Malychuk & Luc Gauthier: Tour the United States of America Tyler Levenson of Afterlife: I have no regrets! 2018 was an incredible year for me.  Camm Knopp of Never Loved: Tour more. Vagrants: Travel outside of the USA  Household: Hang out with friends and family more  Daniel Nelson of LIMBS: Tour with Deftones. Hopefully Chino will read this and maybe consider taking LIMBS out next year? 

Bonus Question: 2019 New Year's Resolution:

Matty Mullins of Memphis May Fire: Perform in New Zealand  Ryan Kirby of Fit For A King: Play in South America!  Nat Motte of 3oh!3: To yet again, not make any resolutions!    Ira George of Movements: Eat healthier  Cody Quistad of Wage War: Be more healthy: physically and mentally. Write the best songs I’ve ever written.  Jay Forrest and Josh Brigham of Hopesfall: Be hardcore.       Ben Langford-Biss of As It Is: Have even less rest.  Jayden Panesso of Sylar: Play in new continents with Sylar, learn more about engineering music on my own.   Tyler Riley of Gideon: Put out our best album yet Adrian Estrella of Assuming We Survive: Workout more, give back to the community and better myself  Palisades: Make more music for 2019 Matt Gravolin of Hellions: Procrastinated less  Calling All Captains’ Nick Malychuk & Luc Gauthier: Play 150 Shows  Tyler Levenson of Afterlife: Travel to more of the world, see everything I possibly can.  Camm Knopp of Never Loved: Bust more butt get more bread    Vagrants: TOUR outside of the USA  Household: Write music and hang out with friends and family ;)  Daniel Nelson of LIMBS: To release a record of my own. I have been heavily into synths and music recording and production in general. I’m gonna try to delve more into that world next year and hopefully have something to show for it.    

WATCH MORE:

[spy-in-the-house]

DAVID LANGER

[ form.known as DAVE DuMONTE from TRESOR HQ / MARIA a.U. / OSTGUT BLN / MS Stubnitz HRO ll DLA Schalllplatten ll PSYCHO THRILL COLOGNE, BLN/CGN ]

DAVE LANGER aka DAVE DU MONTE got into his first contacts with electronic music during the mid of the 80's by synthie-pop bands like Depeche Mode or Front 242 and also Kraftwerk. At this time, Techno and House were still completely unknown words for him, but it finally changed all for him at the end of the 80's when Dave heard from the first Chicago and UK Acid House heroes like Adonis and Baby Ford. His interest in Techno and House devoloped more and more in 1991 due listening to diverse Berlin radio shows, club experiences like TRESOR and - since 1993 - E-WERK, that lead him to serious record collecting in the following. 

Subsequently his DJ career started in 1994 in the German Eastside in Rostock, where he also begun his studies in construction industries. He got his first bookings in leading Clubs of Germany's North-East like MS STUBNITZ and MAU (HRO) together with the Berlin DJ-nomenclatura. This contacts brought him back to the Spree capitol, where one of the TRESOR HEADQUARTER DJs invited him to TRESOR'S "Headquarter / New Faces" event nights on regular Wednesdays. So he quickly developed a certain love for a style that was ranging between heavily grooving an minimal styles, also based on the deeper shades of Detroit's Techno blueprint and the hard and funky Chicago stuff as well. From 1998 on he became a regular player at the "Headquarter/ New Faces" nights at the Tresor basement. From 2001 till the end of the 1st Tresor phasis in early 2003 people could often hear him under his alias DAVE DuMONTE at the legendary OSTGUT CLUB parties and the HEILIGENDAMM Area. At that place a DJ and booker from Zürich (CH) took notice of Dave and invited him to the famous SPIDERGALAXY club in Zürich, where DJs used to play long running of 8 hours minimum.  After the OSTGUT CLUB's closing there was intermittently a gap in the Berlin club-landscape. A group of OstGut adherents started to organize their own interim parties at secret off-locations in the Berlin Underground, and for most of these parties Dave Du Monte was spinning at their wheelz of steel. But for professional reasons, however, Dave finally ended up in the German West where he established himself professionally till today. He became a citizen of Cologne and a resident jock as well at the town’s famous PSYCHO THRILL Techno venue to the present day. Beside this he's also running a small collectors Vinyl imprint called "DLA Schallplatten" which is still distributed by KOMPAKT.

without the past … there’s no phuture … these alltime top25-faves in no particular order

01 AUSGANG [STEVE STOLL]: Wires [ A-side from "Wires" Synewave SW-002 / Formic Distr. US 12" | 1994 ] 02 BLACK JAZZ CONSORTIUM [FRED 'P'ETERKIN]: God's Promise [ Soul People Music SPM-014 / Hard Wax US 12" | 2007 ] 03 BEN KLOCK: Under Pressure / Voyage One / You [ Klockworks 006 / Hard Wax DE 12" | 2012 ] 04 DBX [DANIEL BELL]: Losing Control [ A1-track from Accelerate ACC-102 / 7th City Distr. US 12" | 1994 ] 05 DJ JUS-ED [Edward McKeithen]: Minimal Soul [Underground Quality US UQ-016 | 2008 ] 06 GOD OF THE MACHINE [DERRICK THOMPSON/ DRIVETRAIN]: Metroseum / North Tower [ Xplor Music XPR-007 / Soiree Rec. Int. / Cyber Distr. US 12” | 2009 ] 07 GREEN VELVET [CURTIS ALAN JONES]: Explorer [ B2-Track from "Portamento Tracks" Relief RR-730 US 12" | 1995 ] 08 LEN FAKI  [LEVENT FAKI]: My Black Sheep Interpretations [ Figure 007 / Intergroove DE 12" | 2007 ] 09 MAURIZIO [MARK ERNESTUS & MORITZ VON OSWALD]: Ploy _ UR Mix [ Maurizio M-1 / Hard Wax DE 12" | 1992 ] 10 MARCEL DETTMANN / BEN KLOCK: Dawning [A-side from Ostgut Ton ‎O-ton 001 / Kompakt DE12” | 2006 ] 11 MILLSART [JEFF MILLS]: Childhood Maria's Mix [ A3-track from „Humana" Axis AX-012 US 12" | 1995 ] 12 MODEL 500 [JUAN ATKINS]: Ocean To Ocean [ Transmat MS-014 / Submerge US 12" | 1990 ] 13 PHORTUNE [EARL SMITH JR., NATHANIEL PIERRE JONES, ROY DAVIS JR., VICTOR BLACKFUL]: Can You Feel The Bass [ B-Side from "String Free / Can You Feel The Bass" Hot Mix 5 Records HMF-114 US 12" | 1988 ] 14 MAURIZIO [MARK ERNESTUS & MORITZ VON OSWALD]: M-4 [ M-4 / Hard Wax DE 12" | 1995 ] 15 ROBERT HOOD: Rhythm [ Track from "Minimal Nation" Axis 007 US 2x12" | 1994 ] 16 ROK / JONZON [JÜRGEN ROKITTA & JON STÖCKEMANN]: Sequential Polka [ A-Side from "Club Berlin" International Deejay Gigolo Records 003 / EFA DE 12" | 1996 ] 17 PSYKOFUK [SEAN DEASON]: Psykofuk _ Mix 2 [ B-side from Matrix Records MATRIX 002 / Detroit Threads US | 1996 ] 18 ANTHONY 'SHAKE' SHAKIR: Levitate Venice [ Morphine Doser Doser-010 / Hard Wax | 2009 ] 19 MENTAL MAYHEM [FRANKIE BONES & JOEY BELTRAM]: Joey’s Riot [ B-side from “"Where Are They Hiding / Joey's Riot" Atmosphere Records AT-004 US 12” | 1990 ] 20 SHAWN RUDIMAN: No Hope.No Fear. [ Technoir Audio TNA-010 / Submerge / Detroit Threads US 12” | 2009 ] 21 STEVE POINDEXTER: Work That Mutha Fucka [ A1-Track from Muzique Records MR-001 / Barney's Distrib. US 12" | 1989 ] 22 SUBURBAN KNIGHT [JAMES PENNINGTON]: By Night EP [A1-Track from Underground Resistance UR-036 / Submerge US 12” | 1996 ] 23 THE MEMORY FOUNDATION [MARTIN RETSCHITZEGGER & MICHAEL PETER]: 3 Untitled Tracks [ From "Made In Vienna" M-Plant 303 / Submerge US 12" | 1995 ] 24 THE MOLE PEOPLE [ARMAND VAN HELDEN]: Break Night [ Strictly Rhythm SSR-12357 US 12" | 1995 ] 25 D.J. FUNK #1 [CHARLES CHAMBERS]: Work That Body [ A3-track from "Street Traxx II" Dance Mania ‎DM-070 / Barney's Distr. US 12" | 1994 ] #pics by Claudio Kalex & Psycho Thrill Cologne #bookmarks: FACEBOOK  ll  DAVE DUMONTE  ll  DLA SCHALLPLATTEN  ll  RA SOUNDCLOUD  ll  DLA 001  ll  YOUTUBE  ll  PSYCHO THRILL

[apicturewithasmile]

LOST rewatch (season 4):

[follow the entire rewatch-tag here]

episode 1 – The Beginning of The End:

Okay I have ABSOLUTELY forgotten about this season opening

Hooooly fuck like seriously I had forgotten about Hurley’s entire s4 plot apparently

Bloody Ben tied up to a tree is my aesthetic.

Sawyer offering to talk to Hugo about Charlie, Sawyer being there for the people he cares about, SAWYER HAVING THE CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT HE DESERVES!!!! *cries forever*

Ben making fun of Jack while at the same time acknowledging that Kate was right? Abso-fuckin-lutely my jam!!!

Wait… where did John go?

Oh there he is.

“All I have ever done has been in the best interest of all of us.”

Has a season opening ever been more heart-breaking than this one?

Ben: “Jack, with your permission I’d like to go with John!” – Jack: “He’s all yours.”

DANIEL!!!

episode 2 – Confirmed Dead:

I can have never enough John-standing-in-the-rain-with-his-angel-smile-and-predicting-the-weather scenes

“The bullet went in one side, came out the other. I’d probably be dead if I still had a kidney there.”

“Karrrrrrllll. Now if you gonna sleep with my daughter I insist you call me Ben!”

When did Sayid get a haircut?

VINCENT!!! I feel like we haven’t seen him at all throughout season 3

Frank Lapidus – the best pilot in the world.

Oh Ben, as if John would really kill you.

episode 3 – The Economist:

That episode already?!?! Ooookay!

Naveen Andrews is so beautiful even khakis and a polo shirt can’t make him look bad yet that straightened hair?!??! That’s a problem we gotta talk about!

I’m very bitter that their “Berlin” doesn’t look like Berlin at all. You already know just by the café they’re in: that could be anywhere but sure as hell not in Berlin! Have you ever seen a café in this entire city that has... wallpaper? Matching furniture? Windows??!?!

Oh God that distorted voice of Ben on the phone so we don’t know it’s him is so unnecessary. They could have done the scene without adding the voice of the person on the phone.

The fact that the first time we see off-island Ben is in a vet clinic gives me the strong headcanon that he always wanted to become a veterinarian and now being off the island he’s finally able to #live his dream.

And he’s back at it with that Voice. Which is hot but... really... you still know it’s Michael Emerson.

episode 4 – Eggtown:

I cannot believe that’s a title of a LOST episode

“So here we are just like old times except I’m locked up in a different room and you are more lost than you ever were.” – fuuuuuck him up Ben!!!

Kate’s lawyer is hot

“If I was a dictator I would just shoot you and then go about my day.”

episode 5 – The Constant:

Fjsjfjggs this episode is one of the best ever!!! (as Desmond episodes usually are!!!)

Sayid and Desmond are the curlepower couple I always needed without even knowing I needed it

2.342 – I don’t think I ever noticed that’s The Numbers

The scene with rat Eloise makes me think of Flowers for Algernon

episode 6 – The Other Woman:

Oh, a rare scene of Ben being not injured, cut up or bruised <3

“This didn’t have a number on it, did it?”

#Locke sarcastically gives Ben a dollar

Honestly… I don’t get how there are people who actually doubt that Charles Widmore is the evil incarnate.

It’s the dinner scene!

episode 7 – Ji Yeon:

Oh fuck…. Is that THAT episode. The one where we end up thinking Jin’s dead?!?!? I’m not ready, okay!?!??!

Oh Bernard….

Who needs a heart, right?

episode 8 – Meet Kevin Johnson:

From all the sorta-stand-alone episodes this is by far the best.

I remember the first time around I didn’t like Michael that much until that episode came and I was like “woah, fuck yeah Michael, I miss this guy so much!” which is great because in every rewatch I did since I could appreciate him so much more

“and it’s getting betteeeeeeer…”

Sayid: You’re working for Benjamin Linus?!?!?!??!?!? – Me: Don’t throw stones, my guy!

Noooooo, DANIELLE!!!!

episode 9 – The Shape of Things to Come:

 I have never been more #not ready

Oh right… they had to take away Ben-screentime for that useless plot about Jack’s appendix -.-‘

Oooooowwww I forgot about Ben’s cut off shot gun. Exactly my jam!!!

fhfosdlfnfafdöa another incredible appearance of the phallic baton

“I need you to stay close to me.” – yeah, I also need John to stay close to Ben! Thanks for catering to me.

Goodbye @ all the red shirts on John’s team

Dean Moriarty! So subtle!

So… Ben did a time jump of about 9 months, do I get that correctly?

I also didn’t remember that is was this episode in which Ben “recruits” Sayid

Fuuuck Ben looks so good with that sand coloured scarf – really makes his eyes pop

I cannot believe the last thin Alex had to hear was that she means nothing to Ben. I hope she knows he was lying because that’s what he does!

And I am so here for Ben switching to auto pilot and I’m convinced he never leaves this mode until Hurley asks for his help in the finale

“He changed the rules.”

Ben’s off-island hair is the reason I am attracted to men!

Sayid calling him “Benjamin”? My jam, too!

That smirk on Ben’s face after Sayid agrees to do the dirty work for him? Here for it!

SMOKEY!!!!

Can you tell this is my favourite episode by the amount of bullshit I have to say about it?!?!?!

FUUUUCK THAT SEXY LONDON OUTFIT SIGN ME THE FUCK UP!!!!

The red shirt, the leather gloves… THE HAIR!!! Fuuuuuuck meeee!

“I’m here, Charles, to tell you that I am going to kill your daughter. Penelope, is it? And once she’s gone, once she’s dead then you’ll understand how I feel and you’ll wish you hadn’t changed the rules.”

fuck me this is the best episode ever I wanna cry myself to sleep because it’s so good an Michael fucking Emerson killing the careers of every other actor in the history of motion picture is what I’m here for

episode 10 – Something Nice Back Home:

Why are Sawyer, Claire and Miles surprised to find Danielle and Karl dead? Like… Alex said it through the walkie that they got killed and they all heard it, didn’t they?

Seriously Jack, stick your hero complex where the sun don’t shine – nobody needs it right now

Oh Jack stfu you never learn, do you? Let Kate have a private life in which you are not the centre of her attention

“I’m the one who saved you.” – yeah if it hadn’t been for Sawyer jumping off the helicopter you’d all be dead now so SHUT YOUR FUCKIN MOUTH!

episode 11 – Cabin Fever:

Oh of course…. John is getting another flashback <3 I was trying to figure out what the fuck kinda flash forward he’s gonna get but it’s not a flash forward at all – it’s about baby John!!!

Ben watching John as he sleeps? Be still my fucking heart.

“I used to have dreams.”

“These things had to happen to me. That was my destiny. But you’ll soon understand that there are consequences to being chosen. Because destiny, John, is a fickle bitch.”

Hurley sharing his chocolate bar with Ben is the beginning of a wonderful friendship

episodes 12-14 – There’s No Place Like Home:

It’s okay. They’ll think that we’re in shock.” – “We are in shock, Jack.”

Sawyer carrying the baby - *cries forever*

Fuck yeah @ Sun buying her father’s company

That Hawaiian birthday party for Hugo tho

“I wasn’t being entirely truthful.” – “When were you ever entirely truthful?!”

Ben surrendering himself to Keamy breaks my heart. Ben doing the right thing for once fndangdgn

“How many times do I have to tell you, John, I always have a plan.”

Also when Ben says “Anthuriums” you can already see in John’s face that he doesn’t have a fucking clue what Ben’s talking about.

Terry O’Quinn is looking hotter with each passing season tbh

“Well, Jack… you put a gun to my head and pulled the trigger. I was hoping we could let bygones be bygones.”

“It’s not an island. It’s a place where miracles happen.”

John and Ben acting like an old married couple.

Ben is regretting big time that he even started the whole magic box metaphor because John just can’t let it go

“If you mean time-travelling bunnies, then yes.”

Sawyer jumping off the helicopter djfgoidshgsdogh

Jack just cannot live with the fact that Sawyer’s been the true hero in this situation

I hate Keamy so fucking much

I mean… I know Ben wasn’t doing the right thing by stabbing him but I support him getting his revenge for Alex. Keamy deserved to die for what he did! And likewise, Ben didn’t deserve to be a better human just yet for what he did.

And yet here I am also supporting Sun for wanting to kill Ben. This show really fucks with my moral compass. But then again… Benjamin fucking Linus is my fav character so what moral compass are we even talking about?

“Well, John, I really wasn’t thinking straight. Sometimes good command decisions get compromised by bad emotional responses. I’m sure you’ll make a much better job at separating the two and I ever did.” – I’M NOT CRYING, YOU’RE CRYING!!!

“Goodbye, John. Sorry I made your life so miserable.” – HELP ME!

“I hope you’re happy now, Jacob.” – I can’t anymore, okay, it’s all too intense and I am feeling too much for Ben right now. This guy will be my demise!

I’m not ready for that Desmond and Penny reunion scene

BEN IS LOOKING SO FUCKING HOT!

“It’s dark, Jack. Very dark.” – oh the shade

[the1975hqs]

He’s Matty Healy of art-pop heroes The 1975. She’s Heather Baron-Gracie of pop newcomers Pale Waves. The first time Matty heard Heather’s band he declared he needed to work with them. Two singles, a video and a mega US tour later, Pale Waves are on course to be your new favourite band. We meet the mentor and mentee in London.

The hub of The 1975’s empire is not, as you might expect, an airy, pink neon-lit, minimalist space with Rothkos hanging on the walls. It is, instead, a top-floor unit in a building on a courtyard trading estate in west London. The floor below has a place stocking Christmas supplies, and even on this humid September day, Santa’s grotto twinkles back at you through the open door.

Upstairs is the HQ of Dirty Hit, the record label founded by The 1975’s manager, Jamie Oborne, as a vehicle for the band he discovered as Cheshire teenagers. Now it’s home to some of the UK’s most exciting bands, from the established, such as Wolf Alice, to rising stars such as The Japanese House – whose ‘Pools To Bathe In’ EP was produced by 1975 frontman Matty Healy and drummer George Daniel – and new signing No Rome. There’s a particular up-and-coming band that Healy has really taken under his wing, taking them on tour in the States, co-producing their first two singles and directing the video for the second, ‘Television Romance’ – and that band is Pale Waves.

“I was just so excited to hear a band that was positioned in the left, an alternative band, that was so in tune with pop sensibilities,” says Healy, sat in Oborne’s office, the pungent smell of marijuana emanating from somewhere about his person. “It kind of reminded me of The Cure or The Primitives or bands like that – it’s the happy/sad thing loads of bands have thrived on. I saw them first at Dingwalls, and there was this truth in there. There’s a naivety and a purity to them and an honesty to them that kind of comes through in their music.”

Frontwoman Heather Baron-Gracie, who receives a warm, brotherly hug from Matty after plonking herself on the sofa next to him, puts it more succinctly: “I just love pop music, and when it makes you feel something, it’s even better.” Heather, 22, formed the band four years ago with her best mate Ciara Doran. Joining later were guitarist Hugo Silvani and bassist Charlie Wood. Two women, two men; two goths, two skinny indie boys – it’s a look that shouldn’t work, but it just does. “People say we’re like two sets of twins,” says Heather. “You couldn’t dress Hugo and Charlie up as goths because it just wouldn’t work. Well, we do the make-up sometimes and dress them up in my little skirts and things – but that’s just for us.”

Matty is at pains to point out the precise extent of his involvement in Pale Waves. “The songs were there, so my involvement in writing was only editing,” he says. “I always have a fear of being overbearing. I know what it’s like to be want to be prided on your own merits, and I would hate to be resented by an artist for feeling I’d strong-armed my involvement for my own personal gain.”

Mainly, the message is that Pale Waves are perfectly capable of writing songs on their own – Matty’s a facilitator, not a svengali. And what songs they are. The group’s two singles so far are the near-flawless sugar rush of 2016’s ‘There’s A Honey’ and the heart-melting crush of 2017 follow-up ‘Television Romance’.

The video for the latter was directed by Matty. What’s he like in director mode? “I’m very aggressive, but Heather gives as much as she gets so it’s all good,” he says. “We don’t do miming, we do have the track on at full volume. So I have to shout above the track, ‘LOOK SEXY!’ That’s pretty much the only thing that I shout: ‘LOOK AT THE CAMERA! LOOK F**KING SEXY!’”

The video sees Pale Waves performing in an Ashton-under-Lyne council flat in that looks like a hipster’s wet dream – all retro furnishings and kitsch collectables. It actually all belongs to the 92-year-old woman who lives there. “She had no clue what was going on but she was loving it, watching videos of The 1975 on people’s phones,” says Matty. “She didn’t actually believe it was me in the ‘Love Me’ video, because I was there with my Spielberg cap on taking it all very seriously.”

The first time Heather saw The 1975, it was accompanying her cousin, who’d won tickets to a gig. The last time, it was when Pale Waves were supporting the band on their two-month 2017 tour of huge US venues. “The first night was absolutely mental. I couldn’t even look up because I was like, ‘Oh my god’. We went from playing to about 10 people in Ireland to 7,000 people in Phoenix. It was a bit unreal.” Did Matty have any advice about that? “Yeah,” says Heather. “He said, ‘Just get on with it!’”

Though they’re friends, the tour didn’t provide much time to hang out. Matty was frazzled from the months on the road, and trying to get his head around his own band’s next album. “I was quite busy and quite down and quite emo – I’d been on tour for so f**king long,” he says. “We were pretty much doing a show every day and then when you have a day off you’re in your own little hotel and the lights are out. But it was great to watch Pale Waves grow as a band.”

Heather often writes songs with US coming-of-age films playing in the background for inspiration – her favourite being ‘Adventureland’. That sense of the apocalyptic emotion of teenage life lives in her lyrics too. “Those films set you up for going to America, but when I went I was kinda like, it isn’t what I expected. Like, we went to Hollywood at midnight and I was so scared because there’s a lot of mental people just roaming about. I was going all, ‘Take me home!’”

1975 fans have already embraced Pale Waves, and not just on Matty’s say-so. The bands share a mentality for finding romance in the everyday, and each group is formed around a creative core based on a tight friendship: Healy and best mate George, Heather and Ciara.

“That’s the thing I identify with most, the duality between them reminds me of the relationship between me and George,” says Matty, who, post-success, bought a house across the road from his bandmate to make sure he’s only ever a short skateboard ride away. “I did notice on tour that they never really did separate, never one without the other.”

Heather found Ciara on social media before starting university. “I saw a picture of her in this big group chat and I thought, ‘She’s the only one who really looks like someone I’ll get along with’. The first day we got there we met up and haven’t really been apart since then. I get scared thinking that she might not be a part of my life one day.”

Though they formed in Manchester, Heather’s home town is Preston, a no-nonsense city where the way she dresses – Robert Smith of The Cure by way of Robert Smith of The Cure – marks her out as someone different. “When I go back home to Preston, they do not take to it very well,” she says. Needless to say, her look isn’t as big a deal to her as it is to other people. “Everyone who meets me thinks I’m in a heavy metal band,” she says. “I never really call myself a goth, but others do. I’m like, maybe I am a goth?”

Matty – who adopted his own take on Heather and Ciara’s style for NME’s cameras – says their commitment to it is a mark of their authenticity. “The make-up, the hair, the whole thing, it’s not a set-up for the band. I can see those two girls being like that and needing to be in a band to express that, needing to find each other.”

Though she stands out, Heather says her teenage years were about “keeping a low profile. I didn’t really find people that I got along with,” she explains. “At school I would go to a room to play piano when everybody else was talking in the cafeteria. I’m not really into that – I’m not really a massive social person. Ciara’s always telling me off for being socially awkward but I’m just like, ‘I can’t’.”

Heather has been writing songs since the age of 11. As a teen, she would write “kind of Avril Lavigne pop”; more recently it was “folksy, emotional and stripped-back acoustic stuff like Ben Howard – not very cool music.” It changed when she met Ciara. “She said, ‘Lets try something different, because I want to make people dance at our shows and not kinda just cry: they can cry and dance.’”

Right from that first week at university, Pale Waves became Heather and Ciara’s sole focus. The band rehearse daily, and dedicate every minute of spare time to music. University was a slog she had to get through. Jobs were another unwelcome distraction. “My parents tried to get me into this job entering numbers into a computer-based system for the NHS in St Helens, and I was just not doing it,” she says. “I went to the interview looking like this, but they offered me the job anyway. It was Monday to Friday with some weekends and my brain would just be fried.”

Heather’s days of keeping a low profile may soon be over. Even now, and particularly in Manchester, she’s recognised on the street by a growing band of obsessed fans. “They always call me ‘queen’. It’s dead cute. Or ‘mum’, I get ‘mum’ a lot,” she says. “I keep seeing girls dressed like me. They ask me about make-up – I’m not even that good at make-up! It’s quite scary having people look up to you. I don’t want to mess anyone up.”

The adulation looks set to grow as Pale Waves make their careful, precise steps forward. Later today, Heather’s back with the rest of the band in the studio recording an EP. An album will follow, but not for at least a year. “With the album, I think we’re just going to show another side to us which is a lot more emotional and not as – I don’t know how to put it… Just, like, a bit more intense.”

Matty perks up. “You mean like emotionally intense?”

“Yeah.”

“Good. That’s what I’m hoping for.