Padme and Anakin remind me of many straight couples who are extremely pathological: the narcissist and the enabler. Always together, in heaven forever. More often than not, they appear to be the traditional stereotype of an ideal couple. They are both young, handsome, smart, promising, loyal to each other, trying to build together their careers, their own family. The enabler ignores red flags, sometimes unconsciously, other times consciously. In a patriarchal society due to sociopolitical reasons, the enabler is more often than not the woman.
Till the day the enabler steps up. Then they meet the narcissist's fury. The one who promised him literally the galaxy minutes ago.
Chaos ensures. The divorce is ugly, catastrophic from all aspects. They both fail to be parents to their children. Padme because of sadness ( sometimes the enabler can't have the consequences leading to self destruction) and Anakin because of his raging obsession for power. It's undoubtedly true that both loved their kids. Padme would want nothing more than to raise her children and Anakin showed us in the movies his love for them. Yes, some narcissists can love their kids, especially the ones that score higher on the bpd spectrum than narcissism. In my opinion, this became clear as he grew older and thus, dropped the intensity of the narcissism magnified by his youth.
Many young people find the couple romantic and beautiful. As a young person myself ( 22), I completely understand the lure. But as a person that has experienced this in my own home, I fail at sympathising with the ship itself.
Obi wan loved them both. He tried to be there for both. He took care of their kids. His own life took the backseat. He was a person who saw taking care of others mistakes as a moral duty towards the great good. He was also attached to them. If not so attached, things wouldn't have gotten so far. But in the end, he raised his sleeves and tried to fix whatever was left to fix. It literally reminds me of Jesus who asked his Father why he should sacrifice himself, then did it because that's what he considered to be right. Obi wan's empathy works like that.
He sent Luke to face his father. To kill * Darth Vader*. Not Anakin Skywalker. Obi wan still believed that there was at least a piece of Anakin left in there. He doubted that for years but after decades of meditation accompanied by the wisdom of an old man, he knew this to be possible. But he could come to light only by his pure innocent love for his son, not from his love tainted with shades of hate and passion for Padme and Obi wan.
And that's why Padme and Anakin grow to love Obi wan with a deep sense of respect that they never had for each other. But it was too late for them. Both understood Obi wans value right before dying, when they saw a man caring for their kids, for themselves as well. But Obi wan forgave.
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Bueno, creí que la psiquiatra con la que iba dijo que tengo rasgos del TLP, pero ahora revisando cuando me dijo su diagnóstico resulta que sí tengo, igual cuando se me habilite lo del seguro voy a retomar las sesiones psicológicas, mencionar que mi mamá y mi hermano tienen la misma o casi la misma neurodivergencia, y mencionar las otras cosas en las que quiero trabajar.
En verdad extraño y me hace falta retomar las sesiones psicológicas, además siento como que algo me falta.
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What Anakin said:
I hate you! I'll kill you! You are all that matters! You mean nothing to me! You are weak! You are very wise! I will destroy you! I am what you made me! It's not your fault! You failed! You taught Luke well! Your strength has returned! You shouldn't have come back! I'll kill you!
What he thought:
"You left me! Don't leave me! You left me! Don't leave me. I'll kill you. I'll kill you. I'll kill you. I'll--!" ( https://www.tumblr.com/gffa/738434933494857728/star-wars-from-a-certain-point-of-view-return?source=share )
What he meant:
" I hate you! I love you! Don't leave me alone! Hate me! You should have loved me more! Die! You shouldn't have come back, you'll die!"
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Do any of you have any of these symptom/traits?
Hi, thank you for taking the time to read this. (Mods please don't delete if you have an issue with anything I said, advise me to edit some parts if necessary. This post is important to me).
So I've got these symptoms, I'm just wondering if you can relate, I'll start with more obvious one and build up to weirder ones I guess. Please state if you have these or can at least somewhat relate to them.
Never get lonely. Maybe you sometimes had fun with some people and want more of that, but you don't really feel bad about being on your own very often if at all. You don't feel like you're missing out much or empty/sad about being on your own
Rarely or Never really get sexually frustrated without sex or masturbation. Can go weeks/months without orgasm and not really feel bad about it. Rare to never feeling frustrated because of a lack of sexual pleasure.
Frequent thoughts about being in conflict with others. Real life conflict, movies, online videos can trigger it, but often it can just be your mind randomly creating them when you're alone. Like imagining being in a situation where you've done something unpopular and having to fight your way out of the conflict that follows, or if not that then you're being dominated or mistreated by others, maybe you feel powerless, and you have vengeful fantasies of being powerful and being able to destroy those humans. I like the idea of having the power to obliterate certain types of humans, and don't feel guilty about it.
Regular internal arguments/dialogues.
Things that provide significant emotional stimulation, e.g. some forms of music, can generate uncomfortable or anxious feelings and fantasies - Like some forms of music can generate thoughts about being on a stage performing the song and needing to sing it or play it just right. This seems to replace the normal feelings that may come along with some forms of music. I don't always feel this way, if a song hits just right then I can enjoy it, but a lot of high stimulation music, especially with vocals, can make me feel uncomfortable. (In relation to this, it feels like you almost don't know what to feel as the feelings aren't there, there's just emotional charge but without the emotion to fill it so it can make you anxious).
As you've grown older, you've become more comfortable having idiosyncratic views/mindset, and maybe enjoy the idea of being a joker/enemy of society/disliked. There's a beauty to being on the outskirts, and being a villain is fun.
Enjoy saying things to get a reaction from others. Or at least your fantasize about it.
You may have a lot of neurotic thoughts, but you're often quite calm in real life conflict or difficult situations. Maybe too calm.
Strong indifference to things that happen that should be a big deal but don't make you feel anything, or maybe even amused you, like someone dying or your house burning down.
Enjoy the idea of trolling society.
Warped/strange sense of humour.
Never get lonely. Maybe you sometimes had fun with some people and want more of that, but you don't really feel bad about being on your own very often if at all. You don't feel like you're missing out much or empty/sad about being on your own.
Rarely or Never really get sexually frustrated without sex or masturbation. Can go weeks/months without orgasm and not really feel bad about it. Rare to never feeling frustrated because of a lack of sexual pleasure.
Frequent thoughts about being in conflict with others. Real life conflict, movies, online videos can trigger it, but often it can just be your mind randomly creating them when you're alone. Like imagining being in a situation where you've done something unpopular and having to fight your way out of the conflict that follows, or if not that then you're being dominated or mistreated by others, maybe you feel powerless, and you have vengeful fantasies of being powerful and being able to destroy those humans. I like the idea of having the power to obliterate certain types of humans, and don't feel guilty about it.
Regular internal arguments/dialogues.
Things that provide significant emotional stimulation, e.g. some forms of music, can generate uncomfortable or anxious feelings and fantasies - Like some forms of music can generate thoughts about being on a stage performing the song and needing to sing it or play it just right. This seems to replace the normal feelings that may come along with some forms of music. I don't always feel this way, if a song hits just right then I can enjoy it, but a lot of high stimulation music, especially with vocals, can make me feel uncomfortable. (In relation to this, it feels like you almost don't know what to feel as the feelings aren't there, there's just emotional charge but without the emotion to fill it so it can make you anxious).
As you've grown older, you've become more comfortable having idiosyncratic views/mindset, and maybe enjoy the idea of being a joker/enemy of society/disliked. There's a beauty to being on the outskirts, and being a villain is fun.
Enjoy saying things to get a reaction from others. Or at least your fantasize about it.
You may have a lot of neurotic thoughts, but you're often quite calm in real life conflict or difficult situations. Maybe too calm.
Strong indifference to things that happen that should be a big deal but don't make you feel anything, or maybe even amused you, like someone dying or your house burning down.
Enjoy the idea of trolling society.
Warped/strange sense of humour.
___________________
Helpful Tools :
BPD: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B095SHGB9N
AVPD: https://www.amazon.com/AVPD-Workbook-Individual-Therapy-Dialectical/dp/B0B86H2BCK
HPD: https://www.amazon.com/Histrionic-Personality-Disorder-Journal-Dialectical/dp/B095GLQ425
SZA : https://www.amazon.com/Schizoaffective-Workbook-Therapeutic-Dialectical-Behavioral/dp/B09B3Y85JF/
DID : https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0BGZM9PRN
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