#boy howdy i am COMMITTED.

[the-force-awakens]

"in my [x] phase" "back in my [x] era" you mean you guys don't just latch onto a thing and stay emotionally invested in it the rest of your lives?

[maschotch]

A Taste Beyond Comprehension

day six: sweet treats

part two of my “hotch is good at everything” hc. penelope’s a little jealous, but it’s outweighed (and outnumbered) by the team’s bewilderment. i tried actually writing fucking dialogue since i realized i hadn’t done that yet, so it was kind of a last minute addition. anyway. pretend this isn’t a day late

Hotch was a good baker.

Not a lot of people would’ve guessed that about him, but if you thought about it a little bit, it’s really not that much of a surprise.

It’s meticulous. Precise. Everything is about following every rule to the letter. It requires patience.

It’s right up Hotch’s alley.

Penelope was the one known for bringing tasty treats to the BAU. She enjoyed cooking for others; she would recipe test weekly, and whatever passed inspection would get mass produced and left on the break table or communal fridge. It was an irregular, but common, tradition.

Common enough that no one questioned it when a platter piled with cookies showed up one day in the kitchenette. Or the next week when a dozen pounds of fudge appeared on the counter. Or the following week when there were stacks of tupperware filled with cupcakes.

Penelope was a little confused when a passing agent would compliment her on her latest creation, but quickly brushed it aside. It wasn’t until the third week of undue praise that she asked Derek if he knew what they were talking about.

She didn’t leave the batcave often—especially when the others were out on a case—and even when she did she was either in the round table room or hovering around her friends’ desks. She rarely had reason to be in the break area, other than the times she dropped off food.

So it came as a bit of a shock to them all when she admitted she hadn’t brought anything recently. Curious, with nothing better to do and a laughable social life, they decided to attempt to ferret out the resident baker.

It took a few days of arriving hours early and staking out the breakroom (they had duos on a daily rotation: Penelope and Derek were today’s) until they finally saw Hotch walk in with a tin of brownies.

They thought they were delirious at first. The others definitely did when they broke the news. They sat on their desks in a circle, uncharacteristically silent, lost in thought as they imagined Aaron Hotchner baking. It was painfully domestic; certainly not unreasonable—they knew he had a family, after all—but such a stark contrast to their mental image of their powerful leader. It took nearly an hour for each of them to shake off their stupor and they resumed the huddle to determine their next move.

The confrontation was as boisterous as expected: not by Hotch, mind you, but by the gaggle of excitable agents tripping over each other to get into his office like crabs trying to get out of a bucket. The small room was suddenly very crowded.

“…Can I help you?” Hotch asked warily, raising an eyebrow as the commotion settled.

For once they were quiet, eyeing each other waiting for someone else to say something first. JJ was ultimately the one to muster the courage and blurt out, “Do you bake?”

It was more of an accusation than a question, and Hotch’s face remained impassive, though he felt a hint of a tug on his lips. So that’s what this was about. “Yes.”

They all knew better than to expect him to elaborate on his own. Emily shouldered her way through Reid and Morgan to stand in front. “And you’ve been bringing stuff here? To the BAU?”

Another question that wasn’t a question. Hotch simply nodded.

Penelope huffed, growing a little impatient and admittedly a little peeved that someone else—their unit chief, no less—had been providing food for the rest of the team. Good food. She’d always been better at cooking than baking, and it was a little embarrassing to be outdone by someone she forgot even ate food. “Any particular reason?” Morgan asked, smartly phrasing it in a way that would garner an actual response.

Hotch shrugged noncommittally, acting as if nothing was out of the ordinary. If they squinted hard enough, it almost seemed like he was smug. The nerve.  “Jack’s been wanting to bake more often. He’s trying to figure out what to bring for the class party. It’s too much for just the two of us.”

“Why didn’t you say anything?” He could hear Emily smile more than he could see it, which should’ve been enough of an answer in itself. He knew he would be teased no matter what he said, and he wasn’t interested in encouraging them. He remained silent.

Reid, practically married to the coffee machine therefore in the break room constantly, ran through his recollections of food available in recent months. “Did you bring the sugar cookies last June?”

Hotch nodded curtly, growing tired of questions they knew the answers to. If it was possible for five people to collectively wince, they would have. They knew they would wear down his patience eventually. They probably had about a handful of questions left before he sent them away.

“How long have you been baking?”

He stared at the ceiling for a moment, silently counting. “About 25 years.”

“Oh shit,” Emily hissed quietly, earning an elbow in the gut from JJ. Though none of them could really fault her for voicing their surprise.

The interrogation continued. “Have you brought food before?”

“Yes.”

“How long have you been bringing food?”

Hotch jutted his chin towards Rossi’s office. “More in the early days. Didn’t have much time when I was adjusting to the unit chief workload. But I still do every once and a while.”

Reid was making a mental note of all the times there had been baked goods waiting in the breakroom. He locked eyes with Penelope and they silently agreed to go over the list later to check what she had/hadn’t brought and figure out what exactly their esteemed leader fed them.  

“What else can you make?”  

Another shrug, but this one was laced with barely perceivable exasperation. Their time was running out.

An energy sizzled in the air as they all feverishly whittled down their curiosities, trying to decide what to prioritize. It was only a handful of seconds, but with their minds were working overdrive, it might as well have been hours.

Morgan ultimately made the final request. “Will you make something for us?”

A pause. The other silently approved the question, but they feared all they’d receive in return would be a blank glare. But it was worth a shot. It opened the door for future discussions, which they knew wouldn’t go unnoticed by the senior profiler.

The next few seconds were excruciating before he finally replied. “What would you like?”

If the room was buzzing before, it was positively electric now. They turned to each other and whispered in a hushed deliberation. They hadn’t really considered the possibility that they would have options. Seemingly endless options if his vague responses were anything to go by—a known indicator of Hotch’s humility. He was likely more skilled than they previously thought. It was impossible to decide.

“Can we ask later?” They were all wide eyed, brimming with hope and practically pouting. It wasn’t dissimilar to Jack’s kindergarten class.

Hotch hummed and waved them off with one hand as he returned to the paperwork on his desk, taking care not to smile until the door closed behind them.

[eoieopda]

[visual content blog recommendations]

we see fic recs all the time, but i don’t think i’ve ever seen rec lists for visual content (gif/art/gfx/etc.) creators! they’ve been dealing with a bunch of shit lately between reposts, tumblr garbage, etc., so i wanna shout-out some favorites. thank you for keeping us fed!!

disclaimer: this is not an exhaustive list!! if you have recommendations of your own, please feel free to expand on this yourself and/or drop some of your faves in the replies for others to see. self-promo is always welcome here, too ✨ p.s. some of these are recent finds for me, so pls expect to see more of them on my blog. eta: i will be adding more as i go!!

[bts]

@yooboobies — réka’s gif sets are *chef’s kiss* and the ART? omg. the talent!!! 😭 we simply have to simp.

@cordiallyfuturedwight — apart from being one of the coolest/funniest people i’ve found on army tumblr, i am a kayla stan because the niche themes for her gif sets (ex. bangtan turtlenecks series) feel like they’re made 👏🏻 for 👏🏻 me 👏🏻 even though they absolutely aren’t, lmao.

@hopeinthebox — the bts as reductress headline + incorrect bangtan series are probably my favorite pieces of content on the entire internet??? also, lizzy is absolutely gd hilarious. tags are 11/10. a blessing upon my dash.

@kimtaegis — i’m not visually artistic enough to say this in a way that makes sense, but annie’s gifs are just… stunning? like, the colors? idk about the process that goes into that, but i imagine it takes a lot of time/finesse to be this vivid.

@kithtaehyung — ryen is the renaissance man of army tumblr, fr. not only can she write (like!!!) but she’s multi-faceted and insanely creative with her graphic design. i want her to tutor me, lmao.

@raplinenthusiasts — ooohhhhh my god. the coloring of their gifs makes my brain go brrrrtttt. this bts x the office set is on my “always reblog” list; i’ll share it every time i come across it.

@heybaetae — this set in particular is on my “always reblog” list, no matter how many times i’ve done so already. also, idk how to describe this, but kelli’s gifs are just…. crispy 🤌🏻 like, so satisfying with the…. texture? filtering? contrast? i’m an idiot re: editing terms, but go peep them and you’ll know what i’m trying to say.

@kth1 — literally who could ever forget maggie’s 100 days of (member) series??? the amount of work that had to go into that? unfathomable.

@jeurias — i want to wallpaper my house and office with their gfx. i’m deadass.

@jinstronaut — emmeline has been doing her “a jin a day while he’s away” series for OVER 250 DAYS NOW. i have never been nor will i ever be able to commit to anything to this level.

[multi/skz/atz/svt/etc.]

@starryoong — do not get me started on starry’s paintings, sketches, etc. because i will never shut up. ever. j’adore 🫠 is also a five-star human being.

@irlvernon — my queue is probably 80% max gifs at any given time. god-tier, fr. a must-follow for carats, as far as i’m concerned.

@vcrnons — incredible gifs, lovely human, and also the writer of some of my favorite svt fics??? we stan.

@yelhsaart — i don’t have any words for how much i love their art so please imagine guttural screaming instead. asdfghjkl!!!

@hizuillu — ……breathtaking. legitimately stunning skz art. like…… i have heart palpitations.

@snug-gyu — THE USE OF COLORS. i’m always a simp for pantone-inspired sets; they just scratch an itch in the back of my brain, and BOY HOWDY, is my brain satisfied 😵‍💫

@yunwooz — again, i have no idea what i’m talking about when it comes to the gif-making process, but the colors!!! the COLORS!!! like, taking a mv that’s not super vivid/is fairly greyscale and bringing it to life? ya know????

@booskwan — you want incredible gifs? they’ve got em. you want stunning gfx? they’ve got em. seriously, idk what to tell you except “pause right here and go follow immediately”.

@haechannabelle — listen……. annabelle’s art style is 😗🤌🏻 (that’s a chef’s kiss). the use of color, and the technique, and and and — ! ALSO, i must mention that she took, like, 50 hours to compile a boycott-friendly k-pop playlist. their vibes are simply impeccable.

rev. 4/10/24

[wannab-urs]

The Spreadsheet Digest - Vol 16

Howdy folks,

I went into a state of psychosis this week and read a truly absurd amount of fics... again. I don't even know where I'm finding the time, truly, but here we are. I didn't spend as much time keeping up with the WIPs I'm reading, so honestly that's probably it. Also I had a lil monsterfucking moment one day this week. I'll highlight those green so if you want to avoid reading the summaries/thots on those they're easy to spot.

You can find my Spreadsheet here and all my previous recs here! Do feel free to tag me in your works and I will happily give them a look and most likely you'll see them here the next week!

Recs below the behind the scenes Joel!

SNAFU - a Frankie series by @theywhowriteandknowthings

The Triple Frontier boys as Shifters!!! This honestly makes so much sense? Like they work SO well with this dynamic. I adore Pope and Reader's bond like right out of the gate. What I really, really fucking loved though was Reader and Frankie, of course. I love how they characterized him and I really love the way that Frankie and reader bonded over time. Frankie being grumpy is so fun lol. A lot of the little details in this fic are what really make it good, ya know? The pack dynamics, the bonding moments, the badass reader, reader's uhhh issue (spoiler, I think, so I'll be quiet here) but yeah. Just. Wonderful. Can't wait for more.

only daddy that'll walk the line - a Joel one shot by @millerscoffee

So this request was sent to two different blogs and I read them both and loved them both. I read this one first. I really fucking loved Reader's dynamic with Joel in this. Joel is such a dick lmao. I thought the situation with reader's dad was done well and I also loved the hinting at Joel's trauma. And of course... the smut. God that was hot. Joel is so fucking dominant. The spitting? please. and Reader keeping up the brat thing just really fucking makes it. She needed Daddy Joel to make her behave lmao. SO GOOD

Little Bee - a Joel one shot by @atticrissfinch

And this is the other version of this request that I read. I related to the specifc brand of Daddy Issues in this one lmao. Dad who doesn't want you so you look for a protective older man (why am I like this). I loved the way reader antagonized Joel in this. The denture comment is hilarious. The bee motif is fuckin great, also. I like that Joel kind of initiates things in the mess hall. The smut is so god damn hot man. Like jesus fucking christ. And then the post nut clarity really made me giggle. "should not have done that" PLS

Closer - a Joel series by @beardedjoel

Hot neighbor!joel!! This is a smut marathon style fic with a good bit of feelings. The smut is sooooo good!! I really liked her friend Sofia too. I'm about halfway through this and I can't wait to see how reader and joel's relationship develops!

Rises the Moon - a Joel one shot by @psychedelic-ink

(monsterfucking, but you're the monster! also monster is being used very loosely here) mermaid reader x lighthouse operator joel!!! I really enjoyed this. The mermaid reader was super interesting. I wanted to know more about her background, honestly. And the way poor lonely Joel so desperately wanted to care for her UGH. It was seriously lovely. I also really liked how reader didn't commit to like... giving up being a mermaid for him (even just once a month), and he didn't ask her to. The ending is really lovely. (And the smut is hot idc if I couldn't quite imagine how it worked, it was perfect).

Playing with fire - a Joel one shot by @beskarandblasters

Super hot smutty lil dad's best friend one shot. I love when Joel gets all pissy. Makes me want to tease him even more lmao

Cupid's Chokehold - a Din one shot by @deathwife

I haven't read a body swap fic before and I must say the dynamic with it being Din, so reader can't see his face even though it's her face, and also the smut was just like... really good. I was fascinated the whole time + the smut was hot as hell. It's really fun to read it from the perspective of the dick owner lmao. I really adored their relationship and just overall thought this was lovely. Reader calls Din "Djarin" so if you're like me and marrying Din would give you an awful name (Din Gin....), you're not alone. <3

I think i know - a Joel one shot by @pascalisbaby

OMG Reader's sister is so mean in this she fucking deserves Joel cheating on her. Yes this is Sister's Husband!Joel. And yes it's really fucking hot. Reader is a menace to fucking society in this prancing around half naked and seducing a married man and I support every second of it. I know what Joel said at the end but I think he'll be back for more....

close your eyes, pay the price for your paradise - a Joel/Tommy series by @ozarkthedog

Raider (?) Tommy and Joel are so fucking hot. Read the warnings on this one kids, it's gonna be a rough one. Nothing happens in this part though, really. Basically you're stranded on the road (post outbreak / pre tess) and Joel and Tommy roll up in their truck and take you to their cabin.

a day in the filth - a Joel one shot by @toxicanonymity

This is pure filth, as the title implies. It would seem you're Joel's little sex toy, essentially. Brat tamer!Daddy!Joel. There's a lot going on here and it is all unreasonably hot.

Bodily Exchange - a Pero Tovar one shot by @absurdthirst

I finally caved a read a mafia fic and somehow it wasn't Joel. I really loved how much of a fucking dick Tovar was and how bratty reader was. The end was so much sweeter than expected, which was a nice surprise. Such a filthy fic with a sweet happy ending!

New York or Nowhere - a Joel series by @beskarandblasters

BODEGA JOEL!!! I love when you're trying to help your friend come up with a fic based on a very specific request and somehow you come up with a completely different fic altogether. New York transplant Joel owns Beldro's Deli. You think he's really hot but your friends think he's a creep. I personally think if he's a little bit of a creep that just makes it better, but then again I'm a little insane <3

Shiver and Shake - a Joel one shot by @multiversed-daydreamer

I have ADHD and literally do the thing where I have thought spirals during sex. I loved this take on that experience and mean ol dom Joel being there to bring your focus back where it belongs (on him). Super fucking hot ugh. And it was their first TLOU fic and I thought the QZ Joel characterization was spot on <3

Roads - a Joel series by @milla-frenchy

Baby's first fic!! So you grew up with Tommy, best friends and all that. You get to know Joel as an adult and there's a spark right away. The first installment here takes place 3 years before present day, after Joel breaks your heart and you literally move to get away from him. The promise of so much angst has me salivating almost as much as the really hot smut.

Promise - an Ezra one shot by @criticallyacclaimedstranger

MONSTERFUCKING! I had a little binge this week.. you'll see. Anyway Ezra is a literal actual dragon in this with a big ol dragon dick and everything. This fic includes so many wild ass kinks I simply do not (or did not know I?) have. And yet I still loved it. Thought it was super fucking hot. I really liked the imagery of the castle and the bedroom. Also the end was kind of sweet?

Common Courtesies - a Din one shot by @juletheghoul

More monsterfucking -- demon!din! I fucking love Pride and Prejudice. Jane Austen in general. Mr. Darcy is one of the literary loves of my life. This little Pride and Prejudice-esque Demon!Din fic hit every mark. I loved it so much. Din is so charming and mysterious and sexy ugh. I would marry him in a heartbeat.

Solum - a Dave York one shot by @ezrasbirdie

You guessed it! Monsterfucking. Demon!Dave York!!! I really enjoyed the blending of the movie plot with the demon arc! It was so well done!! Dave was super sexy in this ugh. I too feel a strange pull toward extremely dangerous men covered in blood. Reader gets me. I am her. She is me. Demon!Dave can take me as his little human sex toy any day, idc. I also kind of loved that he was so sweet on Carol in this? Like usually in Dave fics he kinda hates her or cheats on her or she's his ex, but in this one the whole catalyst was keeping her and his girls safe. Very sweet.

Sell My Soul For You - a Marcus P one shot by @absurdthirst

--monsterfucking-- Marcus is so sweet. So sweet that Reader is getting a little aggravated he can't be a less sweet in bed. (Girl have you tried like... talking to him about it?) Anyway, sweet, impulsive, reckless Marcus finds out you feel this way via buttdial and does he like... work on it with you and slowly learn to be better? No. He goes out and sells his soul to a demon to be a better Dom. Idiot. He's cute tho, so I'll let it slide. The smut is super fucking unreasonably hot, of course.

Bad Moon Rising - a Jack series by @wardenparker

--werewolf!Jack-- This fic is actually so fucking sweet!! So part one, Reader doesn't know Jack is a werewolf and he just kinda shows up on her ranch and they hit it off immediately. There's lots of lovely animal references and stuff and it's all really hot. I love the plot too!! this is not just werewolf porn! Shit is incredible! I love the characterization. But anyway if you're not into monsterfucking just read part one. Part two tho... oh boy. Full on werewolf sex. And reader has a kink for it! She's just like me fr.

Kudzu - an Ezra one shot by @beskarberry

--weird alien hybrid ezra-- I have lots of emotions about this fic. First of all, read the warnings. They're extensive and they're there for good reason. I love a good horror fic, which is kind of what this felt like? Like the weird tension and unknowing and the freaky way Ez is talking and that arm. I was thoroughly freaked out (and I love that!!). There were so many clever and interesting things going on in this fic AHHHH, Oh and the ending is just like super sweet and wonderful and so good? The end balances out the kind of horrific nature of the rest of the fic. Also if any of that sounds insulting I really don't mean it that way, I promise. I went in to it expecting to be freaked out and it delivered so well.

Yes Father - a Joel series by @chloeangelic

Your boring catholic husband doesn't fuck you right and you really want to leave him, so Father Joel helps you satisfy your needs so you don't destroy your marriage and go to hell. I love blasphemy. It's hot idc. I think my favorite thing about it is Father Joel randomly admonishing you for foul language and taking the lord's name in vain while he's literally got some part of his body buried in yours. I giggled. I really adore this. It was super fun and super hot.

Pillow Talk - a Joel one shot by @theboredinsomniac

Joel is soooo the jealous type. This fic is basically y'all having an adult conversation about him being an insecure jealous little bitch and it's got the most adorable ending.

Born to Run - a Marcus Pike series by @whataperfectwasteoftime

Penny's Marcus is just perfect. Every damn time. Unless I'm mistaken, this was her first Marcus fic? I was in the mood for a sweet multichapter thing with some hot smut and I was sooooo not disappointed by this. I'm on chapter 8 now, so about halfway through. Marcus is so sweet and precious and still impulsive as ever, but unlike Theresa, reader is right there with him. I really adore that this fic takes place in KY (and it really captures the vibe of Kentucky too) since I'm from there! I very much do not relate to the fact that reader is a marathon runner, but that's okay. I think it's really cool and I love the way they meet and that Marcus isn't fully a white knight? She can take care of herself. Super fucking cute fic ugh. Oh yeah and the smut is to die for jesus christ Marcus is hot.

----------------------

Happy Reading!

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

do—

Do Howdy and Barnaby ever get together in your human au 🥺🥺

of course they do, who do you think i am

oh BOY do i have things to say about human!Laughingstock! im so unwell about them allow me to talk and talk and talk and ta-

~

so in this au they're like... the ultimate slowburn. their feelings for each other slowly simmer and grow over the course of *checks nonexistent watch* a lil over a decade i think. it's not very dramatic - just soft & silly w/ just a heap of pining and a pinch of angst for Flavor

it starts when they were teens - Howdy had a lil crush on Barnaby in middle school. and how could he not? Barnaby was cute, hilarious, and kind. at this point, they weren't friends! Barnaby knew Howdy's name, but only because they'd shared a school since elementary (as with 6/7 of the other neighbors) & speaking from experience, you just Know Those Names. Howdy slowly "grew out of" this crush, especially when the friend group started forming and he & Barnaby became actual friends.

that crush would fluctuate over the years. It starts out strong and then softens into just this hum in the back of Howdy's mind. always there, often easy to ignore, just... part of him, in a way.

Barnaby has a similar experience. when he and Howdy became friends, he got a lil crush - how could he not? Howdy was cute, laughed at all of his jokes and had a few of his own, and was endearingly eccentric. but at the time, Barnaby didn't recognize the crush for what it was. so he elected to ignore it until the crush dwindled to something easily manageable, something he wouldn't realize is still there. as with Howdy's, it'd never fully go away

and its noticeable enough to their friends that they'd all kinda side-eye how touchy Howdy & Barnaby are with each other (Barnaby is a physical guy, but damn. if Howdy is nearby they Will find a way to be touching at all times), the way they always laugh at each others jokes, the way they always ask "where's [x] / is [x] coming with" whenever the other is absent. but the group couldn't be sure if they were looking into it or not. it's too subtle. over time they get so used to it that they don't bat an eye - Howdy is Barnaby's best friend after Wally. of course they're close!

but then there's this one college party Howdy drags Barnaby to (and by extension, Wally). they're drunk off their asses, Wally's edible has kicked in, the party is pretty chill and everyone is having a decent time. all three of them are on the couch, and Barnaby and Howdy start drunk-complimenting each other. naturally, this feeds their mutual attraction, and one thing leads to another! they make out on the couch. naturally with Wally sandwiched between them, snacking on chips and committing the moment to memory (it's a surprise tool that'll help them later!) neither Barnaby nor Howdy will remember this

now, something i'd like to state for Barnaby in this au! he has had a lot of relationships - from one night stands to actually dating someone for months. sometimes the one night stands were a "he takes someone home after a date, & they leave while he's sleeping and ghost him" situation. with actual dating, the other person always breaks things off after a few weeks, if not days. it breaks Barnaby's heart a little bit every time. to the point where in his mid-20s, he just... stops dating. he avoids other people's advancements towards him, he always takes a friend with him to bars/etc as a buffer, he becomes an expert at gracefully turning people down

("why, pray tell" no one asks "do they always leave him? he's such a catch!" that he is! when he was in school, it was his friend group. he'd try to introduce his 'girlfriend' to his friends, and it'd be an immediate "eugh, you're friends with those freaks? no way!" as an adult, people found it off-putting how (by societal standards) unusually close he was with Wally. also, again, a "weird" friend group. they'd think it's too much, or just not their scene, or 'why don't you date your little blue haired boyfriend', etc. Barnaby never holds it against Wally or his friends. he has the mindset of if that person was the one, they would accept every part of Barnaby - and his friends are indeed part of him. Howdy has also dated around a little, but to a much lesser extent. he's too busy! he doesn't have time for that!)

but the ball really starts rolling in their late 20s. something the group does together - as a fun lil rare hobby - is LARPing. they get really into it! Sally made them all custom costumes, Julie helped make the weapons (like a giant sword for herself), etc etc. they fully commit to the bit (even Frank <3). so at this event's point in the timeline, Eddie is fully integrated into the clique, but that's unimportant - just to show where we are!

so they're all doing their thing, it's a pretty big LARP event - there's always way more people than our dear neighbors, yk. they're just part of the crowd! & there's a big battle hosted, the group is split between teams, but Barnaby & Howdy are on the same side! yay! during the battle, Barnaby is "mortally wounded." Howdy half-drags him away from the main battle under the cover of their teammates (including Eddie and Julie) and sits him down by the tree. now, Howdy & Barnaby are the ones who get into the roleplay the most. they get lost in the sauce! they perform the hell out of everything they do!

& since Barnaby is "dying", he really acts like it. Howdy acts accordingly, but again, they get a little too emotional, a little too into it, a little lost in the sauce. genuine tears are in their eyes, Howdy's voice is genuinely shaking a little as he holds Barnaby in his "dying moments" (Barnaby is holding the sword between his arm and his side. he has ketchup on his armor.) Eddie and Julie are getting choked up just watching this happen. and as Howdy & Barnaby look into each others' tear-filled eyes, those little feelings that have been so quiet for so long come right back babey! full force! but then they all get hit with "arrows" and have to die right there and then, and the moments over. but! both Barnaby & Howdy walk away from this LARP session grappling with Partially Realized Feelings.

Barnaby struggles with this the most, since yk at this point he's sworn off dating. he's being careful with his heart! but when he tells Wally all of this, cause he tells Wally everything, Wally's like "oh. yes, i know! remember that one college party where you two kissed for an hour". and then he goes on to point out every instance where he's thought "right, Howdy and Barnaby are in love" (bc Wally is way more observant than he lets on! he saw that shit! his peepers were peepin!)

BUT IT'S STILL A SLOW BURN BABEY!

Barnaby and Howdy don't approach each other about this. they're both in the boat of "well, i'll just keep going and see what happens" to the point where they're practically dating without ever saying anything to each other. Howdy notices how Barnaby lingers around the store more. Barnaby notices how Howdy keeps turning up at his work to talk more. (they already chat so much...) but they still! dont! say! anything! but they both Know! they're not emotionally circling each other they are Dancing to their Own Music!

and Barnaby is letting himself believe that this can work because, well... Howdy already accepts him as he is. Howdy is part of the group. Howdy loves Wally just like the rest of em. Howdy has seen Barnaby at his (presumed) worst and didn't even flinch! as for Howdy, well, he just thinks this is right! his whole life no one has really caught his eyes or heart, but Barnaby is different. he's always been in Howdy's peripherals. it feels natural to love him so deeply. Barnaby slots into his life like the final piece of a puzzle!

there's a lot of stuff that happens in this inbetween state - Howdy's store burns down & almost takes him with it, there's some family drama that needs to be handled, The Crash happens, etc etc etc - so it's a while before they "actually" get together. but they're both patient! they've waited this long, even if they didn't know they were waiting. neither of them are in a rush. they're young. they have time.

[meshlasolus]

The Winner Takes It All

Episode 10

Pairing: Finnick Odair x Tribute(OC)!Reader

Chapter Warnings: more death, more canon typical violence, some bonding between allies because they gotta survive this bitch as long as they can...

Chapter Summary: Danger lies in places you least expect it. Whether that be in the form of a small animal, or in a harmless capitol citizen. No one is safe from anything in the hunger games.

Word Count: 3.2k

howdy ho, pls excuse my laziness as of lately and enjoy some daily updates (i am not lazy i swear i have been launching a literal fashion brand ToT)

He snapped out of his trance when he heard the tail end of a half whispered conversation behind him.  “I imagine with her it would be marvelous, she certainly has the stamina,” one of the men behind him chuckled, the one on his left nodding in agreement before slamming back his drink. “Not to mention the flexibility.”

Finnick was restless, watching the screen, as usual. 

He’d only gone into the viewing party to stir some chatter, enough to get a sponsor, but then he’d been back on his couch, Mags close by in a chair that was far too large for a sweet little old woman such as herself. She did not care to move, either. 

It hurt her, to know that all this work, all this dedication, and all this commitment to the girl that came here from four might be in vain. But she kept a smile of optimism on her face for him, because she hadn’t seen him care so much about something in a long time. He had almost been numbed to these occasions, dulled to their effects. She held onto the same sliver of hope that he had been clinging to, praying that he would not be crushed if she were to lose. She couldn’t bear to watch him go through something like that again. The first time being when he watched the girl from his district die in the arena beside him. They trained together, they were allies together, and they had known each other before the reaping. Just like you and Lukas. 

Lukas, the dear boy with the longing for a loving mother. Mags hoped she gave him a taste of what it was like, to have someone wrap their arms around you and to be proud of you without any cause or reason. Lukas needed that. Lukas needed a lot of things. She hated the rules of these games, hated the games more than anything. That boy deserves to live, deserves to finally be shown respect from the one person he craves the most… but Finnick’s girl. One who also deserves to live, to come home and to let Finnick hold you in his arms. Mags would never bring it up to him, but she knows the glint in his eye is more than just the protection of a mentor. The look of genuine fear when he feels his prized girl may be in danger is not just one of sympathy for another tribute. He’s latched onto this one, she can feel it. She only hopes that when the time comes for one of them to die, that she will not have to face the streams of tears… her own or Finnicks. 

She watches him, the way he studies your every movement when the screen returns to the career pack, now depleted to three careers and a district seven tribute. A wild bunch they are, but hopefully the game makers will not overestimate their abilities. Lukas may have killed one tribute already, but Mercedes hasn’t. Mags doesn’t think she even could if she tried to. She knows that Finnick thinks the same thing. 

His smile when he leans forward is sweet, seeing her open the note she had crumpled into her pocket. She mirrors his smile on the other side of the camera, not even realizing it. His heart melts as she reads it, and rereads it, and then once more. She’s clinging to it, holding onto that little piece of paper. It’s the only communication she can get from him on the inside of this damned arena. 

-

“We should save those, we need to be using this time to gather other sources of food before more tributes come back to the cornucopia.”

Lukas was taking the lead again, and for good reason. There was little debate when it came to who was pulling the strings of this makeshift operation. He’d been the most confident with his survival knowledge, although he lacked in combat from the other careers. 

“He’s right, by tomorrow, the last tributes are going to try and find us. It’s best we stock up everything we’re going to need before that happens,” Lyra said, throwing on one of the backpacks, one of the smaller ones full of Kunai knives and hunting lures. 

“I w-wove this last night, it’s n-not standard, but it should w-work,” you held up to Lukas the fishing net you’d conjured before you’d gotten so tired the night before. It was far smaller than what he was used to, but it would work nonetheless. 

“It’s perfect,” he smiled, packing it up into another backpack, slinging it over his shoulder as he nodded his head towards the trail ahead. 

You all were going to need to find a river, but luckily for you, Rodey had claimed to see one earlier yesterday, when you were all barely limping back to the cornucopia. 

He was doing really well this morning, probably on account of the sponsor he’d gotten. A new pair of shoes to replace the ones that were torn to bits from running yesterday. His blisters were killing him until those new shoes arrived. Now he was chipper as ever. 

“It was a bit further out, had a waterfall behind it…” he trailed, leading you all in a twisting and turning hike through the foggy forest of vines and trees that were tall enough to be skyscrapers. 

The scenery was something out of an old adventure book, something of an era you wished was alive today. Something where the hero gets the girl, and the danger comes to an end. You don’t see that happening at the conclusion of your story. You see your picture in the sky and the boom of cannonfire, ringing out in your ears before it all goes dark. You just hope it won’t be too horrible, too violent or too messy. 

By the time you reached the river, which was barely even a river, you went to the edge to stand by Lukas. You looked out to the waterfall that was sitting at the edge of the river bank, creating the endless flow. It was pretty, or it would be, under different circumstances. The other two of the group had taken off, finding bushes full of Echinacea flowers, and started harvesting those in case of any possible infections occurring in the future. 

“W-what do I need to do?” You asked the boy next to you, helping him take the net out of the backpack and unfold it enough that it will work to catch. 

“Not much. Can you stand in this shallow part over here?” 

You used his help to step down into the water, the surface level barely reaching your hips. The coolness drenching your clothes was a nice contrast to the constantly warm and overly humid environment. You’d been feeling sticky and gross for the past two days, and this was like a little bath of sorts. It rid you of that nasty feeling, and for once, you were happy to be standing in water.

“You’re good?”

“Yeah, I’m g-good.”

He nodded, hopping in as well and handing you one end of the net, beginning to walk over towards the further side of the small river. It was far deeper on his side, but it didn’t deter him. He kept steady, opening the net and allowing it to start blocking the flow of anything swimming through. There weren’t many fish in the water, so it would take a minute of waiting. 

Meanwhile, Lyra and Rodey had stuffed their pockets full of the flowers and other plants that may be useful to them.

“So, Mercedes,” Lyra began, looking towards the riverbank and seeing you splash your hair into the water. She found it amusing, considering she heard one of the boys comment about her lack of swimming abilities. Maybe they’d been joking. She was from four, so it didn’t quite make sense. 

“What about her?” Rodey’s brows strewn with confusion, he turned to face Lyra completely, setting his backpack down for a moment to sit and rest. It had been a longer journey than expected to get here. 

“You call her Mercy, right?” She asked, and he nodded in return. What was she getting at? He didn’t care to interject yet. “Do you think…?”

“Do I think what?”

She sighed, looking once more to yourself and Lukas, before settling her eyes on Rodey. 

“Do you think she’s actually merciful? I have to think she’d kill either of us if she had to, but something tells me she’s not so sure of herself… She’s strong, man… she’s really strong. But she doesn’t exert it. When she fought me in training, it’s like she didn’t care if she won or lost.”

Rodey’s eyes found your smile by the riverbank, something sweet and warm and full of life, the exact opposite of what these games are supposed to be. You contradicted the meaning the capitol gave them, and he wondered if that would be in more ways than one. 

“She hasn’t killed anyone yet. I think when the time comes she’ll do what she has to, but until then, I wouldn’t bet on it being either of us.”

Lyra nodded, seemingly having the same thought. Rodey likes you, he wasn’t going to say something about you that could get you killed before you had to be. That’s the game, but for as long as he can he wants to take a page out of your book, avoiding the rules.

-

Finnick was standing as straight and tall as he could, his confidence on the outside rivaling that which had been seen for years. The side of him that people knew and loved. His cocky gestures and snarky remarks, the slight arrogance and acceptance of man worship at his feet. It had always been a facade, but it was harder to wear recently. Now he did his best to show that he was back, his original self was on display for everyone to see. 

He’d taken the day to become a little more serious about sponsors. So far, there was only one need of a Capitol gift, but as the last days roll around, he knows that he needs to start racking up the funds. You and Lukas have dwindling supplies, and soon, he’s sure the game makers will be using that against you. 

Mags never felt herself useful for this sort of thing, she always sat quietly in the corner and tried to simply read the room, giving tips to Finnick if he needed them. She was so thankful to have him by her side. He was so much better at being the talkative presence in these Capitol functions. Especially ones that had so much riding on them. Today, yours and Lukas’ lives. Next year, another pair of tributes who will need the same supplies, sponsors, and supporters. It was a crucial part of the games, and now more than ever, Finnick sought after these wealthy citizen’s personal assistance. 

He’d taken a break from circling for a moment, standing before the screen, watching you help Lukas with the fishing net. The water was shallow enough to stand in, and you seemed to be doing alright, the current of the stream not pulling or pushing you in any which direction. You’d even dunked your hair into the water, bringing some relief to your body, having thoroughly been exposed to the heat and humidity of this rainforest. Even though it rained often, it was still warm and humid. 

You’d whipped your hair back over your head, splashing Lukas in the face. He playfully scooped a hand into the water and threw it up in your direction, and you laughed with a wide smile. 

You were so beautiful, your smile was stunning. He was momentarily frozen in wonder… awestruck wonder. Like a moment where you gaze upon a magnificent sunset or a calming scene of nature. Something that you have to sit and admire for a second, because damn… you didn’t think anything could be so lovely without even trying.

He snapped out of his trance when he heard the tail end of a half whispered conversation behind him. 

“I imagine with her it would be marvelous, she certainly has the stamina,” one of the men behind him chuckled, the one on his left nodding in agreement before slamming back his drink. “Not to mention the flexibility.”

Finnick turned on his heels, staring down the gentleman’s face, and acting as though he didn’t know what was going on. 

“I’m sorry, what was that?” He played, tilting his head to entice some sort of response. 

“Oh, nothing. We were just talking about how agile and athletic your tributes are. You must be very proud.” 

“I am, and I’m going to do everything I can to keep bad things from happening to them,” he said with a sarcastic tone on the last bit. He knew that with the look he shot the man to speak, they would consider another topic of conversation. 

Finnick only turned back around when they moved on to talk about other tributes. 

What he’d heard pretty much cemented in stone what he already thought to be true. If you made it out of that arena, you’d be doomed to a life the same as him. Being called into the Capitol for nightly visits until they grow tired of you. It took finnick five whole years to become old news… he can’t even imagine how loved you would be for many years beyond that. You’d somehow charmed him without even trying, and here he was on a mission to save your life because of it. He couldn’t fathom how anyone could grow tired of you. There’s no other tribute, past, present, or even future that has a chance of beating you in sweetness and beauty. There’s no other tribute who has your compassion, your mercy… as much as he hated that nickname for you, he now found himself clinging to it in hopes of repeating it back to you. 

The people around him continue to speak of you, and he knows that his selfishness will use it to his advantage. Your life out of the arena would be filled with comments like these, and the repercussions of them, the work and practical slavery of them, not one ever being your fault. But even through all of it, he still wants you to live. He wants you to come home and have a house across from his and beside Mags’. He wants to keep giving you swimming lessons until you feel confident to go into the water without him. He wants to teach you how to fish like he and his father used to do. He wants to take you into the market and show you all his favorite places to get food. He wants to watch you thrive and grow beyond these games and forget about all the bad things. His want for your happiness, his need for your presence to return… It's what drives him. 

He doesn’t linger on the screen for too much longer before he continues making his rounds.

-

The looks on the other tribute's faces when you offer them a piece of split open fish is hilarious. You can’t help but giggle. You have to sit for a moment and think, because no, other districts probably don’t just tear open a fish and eat it. How strange, that the tributes can be so different in culture, but still all the same. 

You’ve grown up eating fish, grown up being around the smell and feeling the texture. It doesn’t bother you because it is familiar, and mundane. 

They eventually sucked it up and tried some, knowing that by tomorrow they would have to eat it anyway. 

“It’s not terrible, could use some salt,” Rodey joked around, twisting his face into different expressions with every bite he took. 

“My m-mama cooks fish better than a-anyone I’ve ever met. Bakes it with lemon juice a-and pepper.” You smiled, willing yourself to remember your mother and her home cooked meals. 

She hadn’t been able to cook in very large quantities lately, one of the primary reasons you’d been hungry so often.The loss of your dad’s paycheck was bound to take a toll. 

“Sounds pretty good to me,” He laughed, leaning his shoulder into yours playfully. His attempts at affection were becoming more pronounced as the day went on. Offering you his hand to step out of the river, handing you one of the blankets to dry off with, his lingering touches and prolonged stares that lasted just a bit too long. You didn’t mind it. He made being in this hellhole a decent experience. You’re going to die anyways, might as well enjoy the time you have left. 

Out of nowhere, Lukas’ yell of warning stirred everyone. 

“Lyra, watch out!” 

But it was too late. There was a long and colorful snake that had just sunk its teeth into her arm. Lukas immediately grabbed one of the short swords and cut it in half, ridding her of the animal… but the damage had already been done. 

“What was that thing?” She grabbed her arm in pain, writhing around on the ground after feeling the spread of its venom in her veins. It turned them dark, the webbing of black inky venom had already sunk too far into her system. 

“Lyra,” Rodey tried to still her movements, her screams of terror going in one ear and out the other. Lukas rummaged through the backpacks, along with you, to try and find some of that healing ointment that the sponsors had given you the day before. You’d found it at the bottom of the last pack, turning around quickly and trying to help her. 

“Hold her still,” Lukas told Rodey, opening the canister, and applying some of the medical treatment over the entry wound, but it didn’t do anything. She still shook like a leaf, and wasn’t stopping. 

You knelt down and grabbed one of the bandage rolls from the same pack, trying to tie off her arm and create a tourniquet from it. The venom didn’t spread as fast, but it was still going, slowly reaching the top of her arm as it crawled over every vein she had. She had stopped screaming, but took your arm with her other hand. She pulled your forwards, and your eyes widened momentarily in fear. 

“Take it off, please,” she cried, her voice now slightly hoarse from the screams. You shook your head, about to protest, but she nodded. “I’m one less person to kill. Take it off.”

You looked at Lukas and Rodey, and they looked upset, but didn’t tell you anything. They didn’t know what to say. They had been happy to have this girl as an ally, but this is the hunger games. All will die but one, and this is Lyra’s time.

You looked back to her, your eyes welling up with tears. With a heavy heart, you untied the bandaging, letting the venom spread quickly again. Her flailing movements and screaming returned, but you had to step back, turning away and ducking your head into Rodey’s shoulder to keep her out of your eyeline. Once again the screaming stopped, and you looked back… Lyra had a look of peace in her now still eyes. She was gone, and the cannon fired synonymously after. You didn’t stop crying, and neither Rodey nor Lukas said anything to you about it. You felt like it was you. You felt like you’d killed her… 

That’s the thing about mercy. It isn’t always about showing restraint, or holding back. Sometimes, it’s about giving in, and letting things take their course.

-

tags(open): @thepassionatereader @i-voluntears @secretsicanthideanymore @mystargirl-interlude @c4ttheart @lilibrn

[callmearcturus]

Dave: *sarcastically* what, a guy can’t just want to feel pretty sometimes?

Dave: *realization* oh my god i just wanna feel pretty sometimes

This is why the petticoat is vital. He puts it on and his dress goes from va to vavoom and he's like "whoa, I'm hot? am I hot?" swishes around a bit. "yoooooooo i think i might be cute." but all he has is his sneakers so he takes it all off again and has to go out to get nicer shoes.

commitment to the bit is the backbone of any strider and boy howdy is it the ONLY thing keeping him going. it's inertia, if he stops to consider it's gonna be a mess, so instead he gets nicer shoes and tries it all again, putting on his nice shoes and the petticoat and the dress and is like "oh hell yes, eat your heart out lucille ball, 'cept i never watched that show, was she even a good housewife, i think the joke was she wasn't, whatever"

i keep imagining this as post-game where karkat is stuck setting up new earth with PM and the Mayor, and comes home tired, that's where the whole idea comes from for dave. karkat being the model of a tired breadwinner. he's GOTTA take care of his man, obvsly? so he makes a way easier dinner and texts karkat like "see you at home ricky"

karkat def shows up on time, like "who the fuck is ricky"

dave spins fast enough his skirt does the floaty thing, like "old earth mythical character. hey, how was work" and karkat is like [dial tone sounds]

[tenebriskukris]

Oshi No Ko Chapter 143 – My Thoughts/Analysis

I knew we were going to be in for a real treat when the previous chapter ended the way it did, and boy howdy did this chapter not disappoint. Spoilers for Oshi No Ko Ch143 below.

The chapter starts off immediately where the last one ends. I said in my previous analysis that we might cut away from Aqua’s reaction where it stands but to see them commit to showing the entire scene like this is a really good sign. Considering how things are framed in the manga, giving this interaction continuous spotlight without cuts is really going to hammer in the importance of this chapter even further.

“I can’t help it. If I don’t hold you tight, I feel like you’ll suddenly disappear, sensei.” Rubyyyyyyyy. You really have to feel for her in this scene. After finding out Goro died when he was the reason she wanted to become an idol in the first place and now that he’s here in front of her you can’t blame her for being so clingy to him. 

Ruby asking him to call her Sarina-chan is as precious as always. Aqua trying to brush it off is also quite in-character for him. The man can be insensitive toward other people’s feelings sometimes—mostly because of his own Issues—but his heart’s in the right place. Not to mention his own trauma pushing him in the direction where he thinks he doesn’t deserve anything good happening to him. Trauma can be a bitch like that.

Ah, I’m sure the mental age comment is going to have people riled up again. It might be relatively accurate for Aqua—though not fully, as we’ve already seen the lines between Aqua and Goro blur by his own admission—but Ruby didn’t get the chance to grow this old in her previous life. This is all new to her, whereas for Aqua he’d already had the chance to be this age in the past.

…Aqua owns a pair of glasses? I recall he had a pair in the first few chapters of the manga where he wanted to deceive that one girl but it’s the first time that’s been brought up in awhile. It could be Ichigo’s but we haven’t seen much of him since he reappeared.

“You always listen to my selfish requests no matter what.” I’ve suddenly been attacked by the mental image of Sarina staying up late to watch B-Komachi and Goro telling her to go to sleep and in exchange he’ll record the concert for her to watch later. 

He looks so similar to Goro in this scene with him wearing the glasses. Perhaps it’s the way the panel and his hairstyle is drawn, but I’m already reminded of the first chapter of the series. The callbacks…

What did I just say about the callbacks??? Ruby asks Aqua if he’ll marry her in a joking manner and again Aqua brushes her off like in the first chapter. Holy shit.

And Ruby’s using the 18 years old line here. I was wondering when she was going to bring that up. And seeing her being praised by the person she loves…it’s so sweet. We really needed some levity after how dark and depressing the past few chapters were. Depending on the atmosphere of some media an onslaught of darkness can be fine, but Oshi No Ko isn’t solidly grimdark enough to justify it.

Ruby is really piling on the pressure here. To her, those meetings with Goro in the hospital room were her light. They were one of the only things tying her to life and a better future since even her own parents didn’t give her the relief of human interaction. Is it any wonder that she was so attached to someone who treated her with overwhelming care and affection? Sarina wasn’t even his patient and he took time out of his day to be with her and comfort her through her ordeal. Of course she was going to be attached to him and vice versa. Those days might have been the happiest she had ever been.

And of course Aqua’s trauma rears its ugly head. It’s an integral part of his character that I’ve seen so many people discount since the series has started. His entire character is built upon the guilt that he feels for being the reason(in his mind) about why his mother is dead. Am I talking about Ai or Goro’s unnamed mother? Either works—but the fact that Aqua’s been put into a situation where he feels like he’s the reason why someone he loves is dead isn’t going to do him any favors. Any sort of healing he’d done over the years as Goro had suddenly been ripped apart after Ai’s death. 

Aqua with his singular white star eye… Oh jeez, he’s really letting down his barriers in front of Ruby now, isn’t he. And I also note that he doesn’t have that black star eye in his other eye. In half the chapter alone Ruby has already done more for him than any of his other love interests. I mean seriously—Kana didn’t even seem to notice Aqua’s entire facade, and Akane couldn’t even partially drag him out of it. I don’t think it’s a stretch to say that Ruby is the most important person to Aqua if he’s reacting like this to her right now. 

And damn—we get to see Aqua’s thoughts on what he’s been doing and how he feels about all of this. This chapter really echoes back some of the things we’d already seen about Aqua and how he thinks, how he reacts and his thoughts on everything that’s happened. The black star eyes return to him as the memories of all the things he’s done come back to him…with the revenge plot looming in the background of this entire interaction. 

Ruby’s star eyes returning as she mentions idols is very on-brand for her. Ditto with this entire infodumping setup about idols. Very cute.

“Sensei, you’re my idol.” Aqua is the real Oshi No Ko confirmed. This is only half a joke as I do think that both Ruby and Aqua are what the title of Oshi No Ko is referring to. So I wonder if in the future Aqua will say that Ruby is his idol as a callback to this scene. There’s also the odd brackets in the whole Oshi No Ko title that I know will be relevant due to Word Of God but I’ll table that discussion until it becomes more relevant.

“Thank you for being alive.” It’s quite plausible that this might be the first time he’s heard those words before. Goro’s relationship with his grandparents wasn’t exactly the coziest from what I remember, Ai famously had issues speaking about love and intimacy, and Miyako would always have some sort of distance with the twins even if she was their foster mother. Even Aqua’s other love interests haven't even got that far with him to say those words.

Blind follower, huh. I know that there’s some translation liberties taken with this scene considering the underlying currents behind those English words, but someone made a better explanation of the subtleties that were lost in translation that I’ll link here.

Oh hey it’s a mention of an event that only happened in the Spica novel! That whole thing where Goro ran to get Sarina concert tickets. I was hearing some slop about how people were talking about it being noncanon because of the material in it and because it was written by another author, but with the Oshi No Ko writer’s blessing, so it’s great that we finally have some confirmation on that end. 

“Nothing’s changed. You’re still the first love I adore.” Putting aside the whole “first love” bit which I will get to later, it’s also curious to note that his behavior from when he was Goro vs Aqua hasn’t changed from Ruby’s perspective. As the only person to see both Goro and Aqua—aside from Ai, but she’s dead—she can make such a statement and leave it uncontested. 

This monologue from Ruby about how she’ll accept everything about Aqua wholeheartedly…it really tugs at some heartstrings. Whatever evils, whatever burdens Aqua will endure, Ruby will accept them all alongside him. It’s a stark contrast to Akane wanting to “save” Aqua from himself. And makes it perhaps doubly hilarious that Akane hasn’t done anything plot relevant to actually stop Aqua’s revenge scheme—hell, she’s even now a part of it.

DID SHE REALLY PULL A TITLE DROP THERE???? AND WITH AQUA SHOWING WHITE STAR EYES AS WELL?????

Oh my god we cut back to the movie Ai and Hikaru kissing. I can’t believe it. On one hand I’m mad because we didn’t get the buildup for it on the set itself and context for it there, but on the other I’m just as satisfied because we finally got to see them set their feelings on the table and FUCKING KISS. 

I NEED to know whether or not Aqua has white star eyes after the kiss scene during the movie. His eyes are still closed in the final panel but if they’re still white after it I think that’s game. Both Kana and Akane have had their shot at dragging Aqua back from the abyss and failed but if he still has white star eyes in the next chapter and keeps having them for the long term…then it’s pretty much over.

Thematically, none of the other girls were able to understand Aqua enough to make him shine again. Akane could only understand a fraction of the whole of Aqua, and Kana can only see Aqua’s facade without exerting the effort to understand him deeper.

But I don’t think this is the climax of the entire arc just yet. Things still need to develop for Aqua and Ruby with the movie production further—there are still issues with the script that need to be touched on, Crow Girl’s presence, Hikaru lurking in the background, and Ruby’s former mother still shrouded in darkness. There’s still plenty of things that’ll still need spotlight on—I wouldn’t be surprised if we’re only about a third or so of the arc down, which is already concerning considering it’s already the longest arc we’ve got. But I’m sure I’ll have words to say on that mess and the entire state of the movie arc after it finishes.

[pb-dot]

WIP Wednesday: AUs are hard

This Wednesday, I figured I should get some words in edgewise about what I'm actually writing this October before the NaNoWriMo madness takes me fully. Writing what is essentially fanfiction of my own unreleased work is a bit odd, so here are some thoughts on that particular process.

So, for those not in the know, I'm writing a shortened version of The Clockwork Boy as a horror story, in which Jake is a bit more cynical and 13 has... let's call them "overly invasive implants" instead of a clockwork body. There's also a bit more of a Beauty And The Beast kidnapping thing going on. That's just a trope I find works for me, but more on that at a later date.

Honestly, I feel like I made things a bit unnecessarily difficult for myself to go epistolary with the thing. First-person perspective seems reasonable enough for horror, since our hero being confused and scared and not entirely picking up on everything is a great place for a horror protagonist to be, but I do fear that constraining it further to what can be told in retrospect may be a limitation too far. Well, I'm committed to finishing it this way, and I do have a pretty fun twist to tie it all up with for the third act, so I am excited about that.

My main problem is honestly that horror very seldom feels good to write. Not because it's fucked up and scary, really, if anything the opposite is the problem. Fear comes from uncertainty, and the terrible miles imagination will go if given half an inch. Writing horror is kind of backwards in comparison, where you have all the facts, insomuch as you have thought of them, and just have to imagine the emotional reaction you aim to induce in the reader. It feels very perilous to me, in that I have to trust that my words will have the intended effect even when they don't have it on me.

In a way, I suppose, it's a good exercise and a good reminder that any piece of writing is fundamentally incomplete without a reader. It is also, I suppose, possible that my writing just lacks the sufficient Word Magic that makes it all work, but it's not a very helpful hypothesis, so into the bin it goes.

As for the non-neurotic side of writing, I have been struggling some with 13's redesign to fit the gnarly Beauty & The Beast aesthetic that I wanted. The thought of making a slightly more realistic and significantly more horrifying design for the clockmen was easy on paper, but boy howdy did I find it difficult in practice. Description of physical matters has never been my strong suit, mostly thanks to getting my start in serious writing in screenplays, where the set designers, makeup and wardrobe people throw things at you if you get too specific, and that's before the producers and actors get to yell at you.

At any rate, I tried to go a little bit ham on describing 13, aiming for something between Brahm Stoker and a (hopefully considerably less racist) H.P Lovecraft in style. My main motivation for the descriptions, if I'm entirely honest, was thinking back to the 2011 YA stinker Beastly and going "Yeah, okay, that, but GOOD and SENSICAL (and a bit GROSS.)" See, to my estimation, a Beauty And The Beast story doesn't really work if the Beast isn't some sort of fucked up. Yeah, there are many ways to be a monster, but if someone's more of a monster on the inside, as it were, then the story stops being cute real fast. This is why I say that there are a thousand ways to make a Monster, but basically only one good way of making a Beast.

So, how is it all going? I think it's shaking out all right. I'm glad I went with the more politically-minded battle anime approach to the story for the "main" version of the tale, but the short and sweet horror thing isn't bad either. Now I just have to stick the landing...

[goatpaste]

Please ramble on about Hot Pants

oh ohhh my friend i hope you understand the can of worms that is inside me your trying to open because

bOY BOY HOWDY DO I HAVE THOUGHTS AND OPINIONS AND SO MUCH TO SAY ABOUT HOT PANTS IT DRIVES ME CRAZY

I will tell you all the things I think about with Hot Pants if you will also allow me to bring diego along into this. I PROMISE im still focused on Hot Pants but he's important to my thinking I promise.

BUT REALLY HOT PANTS IS SUCH a good character in SBR. and maybe I'm wrong by I'm pretty sure she appears more than Diego does in total by the end of SBR. Hot Pants plays a pretty active role in the story usually being left to supporting and being a bridge from one part of the plot to the other.

Then they kill HP off in the most lamest, cheapest way possible that you can barely tell she died or have time to have remorse. An attack that happens to both Gyro and Johnny, kills HP instantly.

We watch Hot Pants reach a breaking point right before her death where the weight of her guilt for the sins she's held in a vice grip to her heart. She is willing to DIE to try and make up for her past mistakes, she has to, its all she known and held onto. After everything, this must be the answer to her problems, and if it isn't? god help her.

But then it just falls flat and feels like nothing. she just dies...

Hot Pants was under utilized as a character SO much. I think she could have played a WAY bigger role in many many ways.

I really wish SBR had a bigger narratives of finding connections to people after isolation through ones self or outside forces. a collection of people who have lost all their connections and seek a magic cure to fix the things that trouble and ails them and are blinded by the idea of some end goal glory that they will tear each other apart for it without thinking of the lose that can come with that. To have a narrative where they must rely on EACH OTHER and the people around them is what they need. Johnny and Gyro needed each other and others around them. they needed people to grow and shape them.

AND THIS TRULY GOES FOR HOT PANTS SO MUCH. Hot Pants has so much guilt in her heart that she has declared as a great sin that she must harbor alone. What happened with her brother was horrible and a tragedy, this was a horrible circumstance that a YOUNG HP had gone through that lead her to make a rash and DRASTIC choice. She, like all the other main guys are selfish. Weather the choice was understandable or not, in the end she chose her own safety. I WANT TO BE CLEAR. I am NOT bashing HP for this and her "selfishness" is NO where near the scale the rest of them are on, but in the act of choosing her safety over her brothers, that was an act of selfishness. And that will haunt her forever.

Hot Pants then dedicates every OUNCE of her being to repenting. So many years spent dedicated to some divine idea, but it doesn't fix anything. She can never find peace this way, to her she has done something UNFORGIVABLE. Her drive to get the corpse hoping it will be what finally take away the weight and pain of her mistakes away. HP is blinded by the idea of this magic holy corpse, just like Johnny and Diego. Yes killing her brother was horrible, it was a horrible situation, but there are far worse crimes committed by far worse people who have cared a lot less than her. Yet she still feels like she HAS to look up to the stars and gaze to a holy golden light to guide her. She HAS to get that corpse because to her there is NO other way to be forgiven. Hot Pants has let herself be blinded by the holy lights of heaven that carry the idea she can repent and feel better and make up for what she did, she's so blinded she can't even begin to look down from the stars and watch where she's walking among others grounded to earth who need her and that she needs in turn.

Her, Johnny and Diego, and even Gyro are all running in circles all hoping to obtain some goal and letting it blind them.

And this is kinda where I need to bring Diego in.

The way people talked about Diego and Hot Pants, I REALLY assumed these two were partners and hanging out together for most of SBR. but it really is just that last clump of chapters.

NONE THE LESS, their VERY good chapters and their dynamic immediately is vERY FUN and VERY interesting

and it was these two specific pages sat side by side of each other that really set me off. This is when I truly felt in my heart, that Diego and Hot Pants NEEDED each other, just like Gyro and Johnny needed one another on a narrative molecular level... That I wished SO HARD that Diego and Hot Pants HAD met sooner and traveled together if at least on and off...

its the narrative parallels that can be pulled from these pages that sent me spiraling about HP and Diego.

With Hot Pants who tried so fucking hard to reach for heavenly repent since the day with the bear. Hiding her truth and in turn forced to face people she cares about always seeing them as good and innocent, never knowing what they had done wrong in her brothers death, and feeling like she needs to bury herself in guilt and sin vs dio who was born into the bottom of the pit of society, already judged at birth and having to fucking crawl and climb his way to the top for a semblance of glory and to not let the world make him feel like less than dirt...

the way these pages are laid out, Hot Pants main big panel on the top, her whole page being in yellow/golden hues, bathed fully in a divine light that she can't even acknowledge because it will never be what will heal her. No matter what she really thinks, at this point I think she believe the only path to ever stop feeling this way is death.

Then Diego on the bottom panel, blue desaturated panels with him being in shadows. A man who never had anything good given to him in a kind hand beside from his own mother... the only kind hands he's known... and without her he has nothing, nothing but a goal to fight back on the narrative society would try to force him into. He WILL get that corpse and it will be his ticket to finally be above everything else, he will never be looked down on and he will finally have the life he and his mother deserved.

HP is the one who can only feel she had done wrong and will carry that forever, while everyone around her only shows her kindness she feels she never deserved.

While Diego is the opposite to this, he's done no wrong, nothing but be born. By the way of his birth society would already judge him and his mother, his very existence and status in society would be his downfall, and all he did was be born. A young boy who had only been shown scorn, he and his mother didn't deserve it and he will never accept it again. He will not let that corpse go, its his ticket to stand above all. A man with the biggest ego, who can no longer be conventionally good or else the world might take advantage of that again.

How much of their characters circle around their family between Hot Pants feeling she betrayed her own family, their trust and safety and no longer feeling she was deserving to be near them or cared for by them. To bury herself in holy duties hoping to one day be someone who can be forgiven by god himself. Be forgiven or by buried. Not able to see part of the healing was to forgive herself.

Then Diego who only truly had his mother to lean on and trust to be cared for in a world that only saw them as dirt, disposable tools. Then having his own mother riped away from him with no choice in the matter because the world was cruel. Now he can only have himself, the world has never shown him a reason to trust it, only to stand above it and never make him dirt again. Diego can't trust others or not be in control.

And with that I think they needed each other for these exact reasons and parallels.

They woulda been PERFECT foils for one another. HP would bust Diego's ego down a notch by not even give him the time of day to even care to let him know she's disliking him. HP could not be more indifferent to Diego. He is just some guy and he needs someone who would put him in his place. With trust in a person who neither see's him as this grand persona he's put together or as some lowly penniless boy.. shit maybe he doesnt have to stand alone, maybe he can be ok with someone else making choices. maybe with Hot Pants he doesnt have to worry their looking at him through specific leans that will predetermine how Diego will be treated and seen by others.

and HP in turn maybe just need a bit of a crazy guy to get her to do wild thing and deserve to be happy. You've worked hard and shown the world your worth something grand, take what you have earned and never let it go. Ask for more! You are alive, you got to live so dont let yourself waste away a life because your feel a lil sad. Your alive and you have so much to prove and your going to make sure the world doesn't forget it!

I think they really REALLY could have been really good pushes of character for BOTH of them. LIKE in the easiest sense to put it.. Hot Pants could make diego better and Diego could make Hot Pants worse, but in the best way for one another. Diego needs someone to realize he's just some guy and his egos only gonna get him so far. and Hot Pants needs someone to get him to stand up and be a lil selfish and do something because it makes them happy in that moment and not focused on always wondering if what their doing will settle their divine debt of sin.

OK AND MOVING AWAY FROM MY WHOLE SPECIFIC THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS ABOUT HP AND DIEGO

I think we could have had VERY solid Plot with Lucy and HP

I think the tubular bells arc coulda been done WAY better with it was about Lucy and HP working together. One, to stop forcing lucy to do all this shit the adults should be doing. Two, using Lucy as a way to open up HP to the past she is haunted by in the form of her brother. Seeing her late brother in Lucy in these subtle ways and HP not knowing how to deal with these feelings. she CANT let herself get attached or connected, she lot her brother, she MURDERED her brother, she isnt allowed to replace him and be happy.

but.. she can't let it happen again. She can't let Lucy throw herself into danger... oh god she can't watch Lucy walk into the mouth of the beast, Hot Pants can't let it happen again.

Its exactly what she needs. Connections and things that ground her and make her realize killing herself to get some holy corpse is never going to be what makes her feel better...

HP and Lucy infiltration also woulda been narratively way better with like, HP seducing the presidents wife and it being funny and awkward because like.. its Hot Pants lol. im mostly just saying this because it woulda been funny.

and Lucy getting corned in by tubular bells while getting to Valentine while Hot Pants keeps up distractions. HP ultimately failing at getting all the corpse part back and mission failure because she choses to save Lucy instead of recover the holy corpse...

PLAYING IN PARALLEL TO JOHNNY AND GYRO AT THE END OF THE SUGAR MOUNTAIN ARC ALSO ALSO

I WISH MORE PEOPLE WERE FRIENDLY AND TREATING LUCY LIKE A LIL SISTER/DAUGHTER AND NOT GROSS

Lucy and HP as siblings would have meant the WORLD to me...

ANYWAYS this ended up very long, but I actually expected that to happen. I warned you lol

but YEAH im on 2 hours of sleep in the last 24hrs or whatever so this is a bit rambly and messy thoughts from me, but the general idea is there lol

LITRALLY TO if any of my beloved mutuals want to chime in I want to hear and share your thoughts on the matter,, i know some people brought up great Hp Points/HP and Diego Points in the server and I just love feeling like this talking about HP

[he-is-lightning-in-a-bottle]

Rules: List 10 of your comfort shows, then tag 10 people

I was tagged by @lurkingshan and boy howdy am I pleased Shan tagged me! I love my comfort watches, talking about my comfort watches, and even talking about what a comfort watch is. I struggle with anxiety, and it affects the way I watch TV. (When I watch a new drama with zero spoilers, for example, it's liable to set off my anxiety BECAUSE I DON'T KNOW WHAT WILL HAPPEN AND IT STRESSES ME THE F OUT.) So for me, a comfort watch is anything I can watch on high-anxiety days that eases my pulse and lowers my blood pressure and restores my sense of balance. That does not necessarily mean it's all cozy fluff, though, as demonstrated by the very first show on my list! It just means I find the show familiar enough to be comforting, or the themes particularly heartwarming. And yes, it sometimes means it's no-drama fluff.

Hannibal -- Probably because I think this is only the single most perfect show ever produced and I practically have it memorized, I find this show to be wildly comforting instead of anxiety-inducing, despite its subject matter. Yes, it's a show about a cannibalistic serial killer and the FBI special agent who befriends him. But it's also one of the best (and only) examples of magical realism on our TVs and its really, really, really exquisitely crafted. From the cinematography to the acting to the script, there is not one single flaw in this perfectly executed drama.

One Spring Night -- The ironic thing here is that I don't think this is one of the best kdramas ever, nor is the subject matter all fluffy, but I have re-watched it more than any other kdrama ever. I find the main female lead to be a refreshingly honest woman who sets excellent boundaries and sticks to them while advocating for mutual respect. In this drama, a single dad meets a woman who is stuck in a mediocre long-term relationship. Their ensuing romance is quite sweet with almost no misunderstanding. They both have excellent communication skills and healthy relationship dynamics. The main male lead is very uncalculating and honest. All the characters feel authentic, and I particularly like the dynamic between the female lead, her sisters, and their mom. Sadly there are a few really toxic male side characters and a side plot of domestic violence. I always skip their scenes on every re-watch though.

Old Fashion Cupcake -- In this slice of life, age gap, gay romance, an employee nurses a long term crush on his older boss and finally begins seducing him with fancy pancakes. I adore this story about the middle aged lead's healing journey from severe repression. Of course it helps that the leads have A+ chemistry and the show has excellent production values. It's also not a huge time commitment, so it's perfect for rewatching.

Because This is My First Life -- In this slice of life romcom kdrama, a thirty-something woman who recently had the rug pulled out from under her by life enters into a contract marriage to secure a decent roof over her head. The male lead is respectful and endearing, the female friend group is downright fabulous, and the dialog is practically poetic. I also like how much self-respect the main female lead has (this seems to be a running favorite of mine).

Another Miss Oh -- This romcom kdrama holds a special place in my heart for having both the absolute best k-drama first kiss and also having a full cast of quirky side characters who aren't the least bit annoying. (Usually when comedies aim for quirky characters, I find at least one of them super annoying.) This drama has it all: excellent pacing, hilarious shenanigans, a small dose of pre-cognitive visions (without veering into a murder mystery plot!), warm-hearted reveals about characters, relatively high-heat for a kdrama, and a killer cast.

Semantic Error -- In this romcom BL, a sexy older boy discovers a serious younger boy (who is likely on the spectrum) has outed him as a slacker, starts out bullying him, and accidentally falls madly in love instead. Opposites attract, excellent production values and great visual storytelling with believable lead chemistry and sweet, A+ post-credit finale scene. Perfectly paced and relatively low time investment, so it's perfect for a lighthearted re-watch.

Business Proposal / Sh**ting Stars / 20th Century Boy and Girl / The Fabulous / Jugglers / Gogh The Starry Night / King The Land -- These are all interchangeable (to me!) "no-drama romcoms", meaning they resolve any potentially anxiety-inducing dramatic plot points within the length of an episode. They are lighthearted, laugh out loud funny, and filled to the brim with endearing characters, fantabulous friend groups, and familiar tropes. If you're looking for classic friends to lovers, pretend relationships, or workplace romances, these are your jam.

The Glory -- What. A. Masterpiece. In it, a 36 year old woman slowly takes revenge on her childhood bullies. It's soooo satisfying to watch and re-watch y'all (especially if you can make it past the first episode which graphically depicts the abuse she survived). Unlike many revenge dramas, no one gets a redemption arc and instead everyone gets exactly what they deserve (no more or less). There's a slight romance thread that is well-designed, incredible dialog, A+ acting, and excellent pacing and reveals. I comfort watch this when I want to see smart, well-executed justice married to brilliant storytelling.

A Piece of Your Mind -- My go-to healing journey drama about coping with loss. Sometimes you just need a good cry, and the first few episodes of this deliver! This is slice of life romance mixed with a smidge of futuristic AI and is a heartwarming exploration of various kinds of grief and loss, all while mixing in a sweet romance plot with lots of likeable characters.

Boise Boys/Outgrown -- Sometimes a comfort watch is turning off your brain while watching competent craftsman create order out of chaos. While most HGTV home shows feature a lot of soulless design, Luke Caldwell's design aesthetic is pretty much identical to my own (an eclectic blend of mid century modern with colorful accents and inviting textures in practical layouts). It is seriously comforting to see old, possibly abandoned houses be turned into stunning and livable homes. Downright peaceful on my truly high-anxiety days!

Honorable Mentions (because ONLY 10 IS A JOKE) go to Star Trek Deep Space Nine, Moonlight Chicken, Bad Buddy, Lost/Human Disqualification, Lovely Writer, History 2: Right or Wrong, History 3: Trapped, Be Loved in House I Do, and My Love Mix-up because I either re-watch them whole (or my favorite scenes from them) somewhat regularly when nothing else can quite scratch my comfort watch itch.

Tagging @piningbisexuals, @spicyvampire, @absolutebl, @syrinth, @dean-you-assbutt-cas-loves-you, @thequeenofsastiel, @tiggymalvern and any one else who wants to play!

[coffeeskater]

Committed to buying brake drums and shoes. Gonna pick em up at work tomorrow which means I also have to commit to going to Canadian Tire to get some rustoleum to treat them tomorrow so I can put it together on Friday or Saturday.

Good news: parts cost me like 80$ and my partners mother got me a gift card so I got the rattle can covered.

Bad news: it's still -10c or colder so I'm gonna have to build a shitty painting booth and I'm gonna have to do the work in the cold ass garage.

But on the plus side, I am really happy I'm getting one more thing on the list done. I am not looking forward to April when I have to commit to dropping the engine to do the timing cover. I am so tempted to just pay someone to do it because Jesus Christ do I not wanna drop my own cars engine yet, but boy howdy I sure as shit can't give my transphobic co-worker more of a reason to shit all over me.

[contrastparadoxx]

Vrayan I’m in the inescapable itchy stage of recovery can u commit a violence for me about it bc boy howdy im feelin the Aaaaaa about it lol

“Pretty sure I’m like way more healed than you because I just heal faster and I am certainly feeling so full of violence and murder, lemme make sure Teagan isn’t going to like- ground me if I do something but as long as he’s good I will commit violence for the both of us”

[emerals]

the lads but it’s cards against humanity

some of these are funny most aren’t lmao

prompts are bolded!!

OZZY - - Seeing my father cry; kid-tested, mother-approved. - Step 1: A sorry excuse for a father. Step 2: Vehicular manslaughter. Step 3: Profit. - What's my secret power? Fucking all my dad's friends. - What's that smell? Poor life choices.

JUNIPER - - Excuse me, straight man, but all the different kinds of lesbians isn't for you, STRAIGHT MAN. - Mr. and Mrs. Diaz, we called you because we're concerned about Cynthia. Are you aware that your daughter is throwing grapes at a man until he loses touch with reality? - Girls. High five, bro. - A romantic candlelit dinner would be incomplete without getting serial killed.

XIMENA - - I never truly understood hot people until I encountered your mom. - But before I kill you, Mr. Bond, I must show you vigorous jazz hands. - That's right, I killed heteronormativity. How, you ask? Bees? - For my next trick, I will pull science out of a Bop It.

WHITTANY - - I drink to forget being rich. - Uh, hey guys, I know this was my idea, but I'm having serious doubts about breaking into song and dance. - I got 99 problems but crumbs all over the god damn carpet ain't one. - Hey guys, welcome to Chili's! Would you like to start the night off right with kissing grandma on the forehead and turning off her life support?

ASH - - Arby's We Have completely unwarranted confidence. - When I am President, I will create the Department of a bitch slap. - Hey Reddit! I'm judging everyone. Ask me anything. - I'm LeBron James, and when I'm not slamming dunks, I love two Xanax and a bottle of wine.

VIVIAN - - YAAAAAAS! You are serving me daddy issues realness! - Dude, do not go in that bathroom. There's men in there. - What's the best metaphor for our political system? 30 shirtless bears emerging from the fog. - 50% of all marriages end in listening to her problems without trying to solve them.

EVERETT - - In the new Disney Channel Original Movie, Hannah Montana struggles with the patriarchy for the first time. - What are my parents hiding from me? Saying "I love you". - As the mom of five rambunctious boys, I'm no stranger to a little boy who won't shut the fuck up about dinosaurs. - If you can't love yourself, how the hell you gonna love committing treason?

KIWI - - Mamma Mia. Here I go again. My! My! How can I resist giggling like an anime girl? - Kids, I don't need drugs to get high. I'm high on sunshine an rainbows. - TSA guidelines now prohibits wizard music on airplanes. - My fellow Americans: Before this decade we will have Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson on the moon!

DEAN - - I get by with a little help from self-loathing. - I'm no doctor, but I'm pretty sure what you're suffering from is called "being fucking pathetic". - Your dreams are one click away! Learn more at Hope.com. - What's the most emo? A lifetime of sadness.

NIX - - Maybe she's born with it. Maybe it's menstrual rage. - The class field trip was completely ruined by whatever straight people do for fun. - It's a pity that kids these days are all getting involved with unfathomable stupidity. - Old MacDonald had dark and mysterious forces beyond our control. E-I-E-I-O.

HUNTER - - Howdy neighbor! I couldn't help but notice you struggling with getting into a pretty bad car accident. Need a hand? - Why can't I sleep at night? Dead parents. - When I was tripping on acid, BATMAN! turned into therapy. - I'm Tony Robbins, and over the next sixty minutes I'm going to teach you how to harness the power of the Kool-Aid Man!

DOTTIE - - What's there a ton of in heaven? Some god damn peace and quiet. - What's a girl's best friend? Solving problems with violence. - I'm going on a cleanse this week. Nothing but kale juice and silence. - IF you like sipping kombucha like a smug piece of shit, YOU MIGHT BE A REDNECK.

ADEN - - Check me out, yo! I call this dance move "establishing dominance." - White people like drinking gasoline to see what it tastes like. - Just saw this upsetting video! Please retweet!! #stopmyinnerdemons - Why do I hurt all over? A mistake.

SYLVIA - - Designers! For this week's challenge, you must make a dress designed for telling Heather she can't pull off that top. - Daddy, why is mommy crying? Toxic masculinity. - And the Academy Award for complaining goes to the careless cunt who left a water ring on my credenza. - Why am I sticky? Soup that is too hot.

LOUIE - - Instead of coal, Santa now gives the bad children PTSD. - We're here! We're doing crimes! Get used to it! - Today on Maury: "Help! My son is being a motherfucking sorcerer!" - Premiering tonight: NBC's new heartfelt family drama, This Is an old guy who's almost dead.

MARSHALL - - I'm sorry Professor, but I couldn't complete my homework because of some guy. - What never fails to liven up the party? Being on fire. - Well if you'll excuse me, gentlemen, I have a date with kayaking with my sluts. - Here is the church. Here is the steeple. Open the doors and there is a messy bitch who lives for drama.

[menthol-drops]

Tag game!

Tag 9 people who you want to get to know better!

Tagged by @seiya-starsniper 💖💖

Three ships: Dreamling, Corintheus and Hannigram (deranged boys and i love them)

First Ever Ship: UUUUUH ok so. This was. Before SPN seasons 10 and beyond came out so pls…… have mercy on my soul but i was (and kinda still am) a samifer shipper. There was something about the “MFEO”/i hate you and you hate me dynamic that just spoke to me so hard early in my SPN fandom days. Lots of really good fic written for them too.

Last Song: Real Life by Bastille because i like to listen to them while i do homework (took my last final for the semester today thank fuck) and also because their music is Peak “Angsty lyrics with an upbeat sound”.

Last Movie: Reinfeld! I went to see it with my friends in a spur-of-the-moment 10:30pm cinema run lmao. It was stupid and funny and i loved it.

Currently Reading: Holy Feast and Holy Fast because @xx-vergil-xx got me on it and BOY HOWDY IS IT A GOOD BOOK very interesting and very informative. I started reading it a couple months ago and got too busy to finish it so I’m trying to now lmao

Currently Watching: uh. Nothing in particular just waiting for GO2 to drop….. been too busy to like. Start anything new

Currently Consuming: ✨air✨ cause I’m have sleepy bitch disease and don’t want to have anything beverage or food rn because bedtime

Currently craving: I WANT FUCKING EGGPLANT LASAGNA!!!!!!!!!!!!! Pregnancy (cause that’s a thing that is happening!) cravings are starting to hit and i would commit crimes for a fucking eggplant lasagna rn though i don’t want to eat

Tagging (w/no pressure bc these should be fun): @xx-vergil-xx @theylor @zuleeky

Not nine because I don’t know who else to tag 😅

[clouseplayssims]

Medieval Traits Project

So I know I’m supposed to take it easy, and I’m trying to do that, but there are limited ways for me to shut my brain up when it wants to think about THINGS.

That said, I haven’t forgotten about my interest in traits - specifically, I want all the sims 3 medieval traits in game. I’m fairly certain I can make the objects without fuss, but I would like for them to do something, you know? Trouble is I’m not sure what I even want some of them to do, or I have ideas but they might be out of my realm of experience. So I’m gonna try but I’d love to idea source a bit.

Under a cut because it’s long. Please keep in mind my intent is to just make the objects and then if I’m feeling squirrely try and make them function.

Adventurous

Ideally I’d like if a want to go to a community lot rolled up more frequently, or hiking wants. it would be super cool for a rabbit hole interaction of “go on an adventure” but again, I am but a simple creature and it makes me a bundle of nerves thinking about it. A boost to fun after completion would be top notch.

-Giving Discuss Adventures and Describe Exotic Locales social options.

Call of the Sea

Fishing wants rolled frequently, regardless of aspiration. If the rabbit hole thing is even possible, “go on a whale hunt” would be cool.

Chivalrous

I love the possibilities for this trait and romance sims. You have no idea. Now what can and can’t be done, especially by me... different story. Best option: if a sim is dating/married/engaged, all romantic options with other sims are unavailable. No flirty, no touchy, no thinking about touchy. If that can’t be done, then they take a mood hit for cheating. Single chivalrous sims would have a boost to any romance they begin.

-Give donate to the poor at mailbox option.

Creative Cook

Preparing meals is quicker. Meals are more filling (like the seasons crop bonus but always for these sims?) and give a medium mood boost to fun as well. These sims can also eat rotten food without penalty. Potential way to unlock whale stew only for them?

-Give Gush About Cooking social

Dedicated

Genuinely, I have no idea how to translate extra responsibilities to TS2.

-Give Complaint About Work friendly social.

Earthy

Better mood when outside - similar to loves the outdoors. Increased percentage of finding cool stuff hiking? (without breaking hiking mod) Finding bugs more easily than other sims? I’d love to tie this to Sun&Moon objects when it comes to herbs too, not sure how.

Eloquent

-Give Comfort with Well-Chosen Words, Pontificate Poignantly, and Give Inspirational Speech friendly socials.

Entitled

An available allowance via mailbox? Starting funds for careers less? I like the idea that these sims don’t get along with non-noble/royal sims unless they’re also entitled and it takes longer to build those friendships.

Evil

Not sure if it’s possible to give them a mood boost when they witness “evil” but boy howdy I’d love it so they always did the evil witch hand-rubbing grin whenever nonsense like a brawl or public woohoo went down.

Excitable

10 neat points and asked to clean levels of excitement about everything. Mood boost for socializing, cooking, or fulfilling a want. Would it get annoying? Maybe. Would it still be adorable? Obviously

Friendly

Friendly interactions are accepted more often.

-Give Compliment Garments and Say Kind Words friendly socials.

Fun-Loving

Mood boost when having fun. Wants to do “fun” things more often like juggle, jump on the couch, go to community lots, etc. Mood tanks when “bored” aka fun gets too low.

Good

Committing “mean” socials causes mood decline. Able to donate to the poor at mailbox. Other sims get a small mood boost when completing friendly interactions with these sims.

Greedy

Mood boost when they earn money. They can also borrow money without having to pay it back from other sims - small and large amounts.

Haggler

Wholesale prices available always? I like the idea that sims with the merchant trait have a harder time building relationships with haggler-traited sims. Not sure if they can haggle at sim-owned businesses or not, like... asking for the “offer at” lower price option?

Hopeful Orphan

The one that started it all. I had a sims in TSM with this trait and I’ve always wanted it in TS2. Not sure if the game can randomly send them information about their parents - the only thing I can kind of think of is the thing where you get products to “try out” from random townies.

-Give Ask About Parents, Tell Life Story, and Talk About Parents friendly socials.

Jokester

Funny social are jokes have greater positive effective. Mood boost for other sims after hearing jokes.

-Give Jest About Dragons, Jest About State of Kingdom, Joke About Peasants and Nobles funny socials.

Loves Family

I want this different from family-oriented. One should be more direct family, the other should be like... I just love my whole family I’m showing up to all their nonsense with a supportive banner.

-Give Talk About Family and Spread the Love friendly socials.

Scholarly

Wants to read books come up more often. Examine everyday objects? No idea how to include that.

Solitary

Positive mood boost when alone. If the rabbit hole thing can work, “go on a solitary quest” would be a nice option for them, just to make them different from loners. Negative mood when around crowds.

Unkempt

Can sleep anywhere - no naps, we sleep on the floor like MEN! Mood increase the lower their hygiene is. Can eat spoiled food without penalty. Not sure if they can generate some type of grunge overlay, but that would be a delight.

Vain

Gussy up increases mood. Possible mirror interaction to “Admire Beauty” that increases mood? Rolls mirrors wants a lot. Like. A lot a lot. Think of the normal pet wants in the game, replace them with various mirrors at assorted prices.

-Give Enthuse About Self, Extol Personal Virtues socials.

Whale Ate My Parents

Listen if we CAN do rabbit hole off the lot nonsense, WHALE HUNTING. Random mood tank in these sims resolved by going whale hunting to simulate whale rage. Shout At Ocean interaction would be a delight. If buying things like specific-priced deco that’s meant to signal to the player “go buy this whale bone” is possible that would also be a delight.

-Give Shout Out Ocean interaction, Talk About Whales, Share Whale Story, Discuss Whale Hunt social

Bloodthirsty

Rolls want to win a fight frequently. Will want to fight sims with lower relationships as well.

Compulsive Gambler

To make my addiction system easier lets build these addictions in my good dudes! Rolls want to play poker and darts frequently. Not sure betting between sims is an option, but would be cool.

Cowardly

Mood decrease when outside at night. Rolls more random silly fears because why not. Would love if they could do the “run away from fire” interaction just, because why not. Fainting too.

-Give Warn Sim About Monsters, Warn Sim About Darkness, Warn Sim About End Times socials.

Cruel

Not sure how to show off pent-up anger, maybe just mood boost when they’re mean?

Cursed

Random sad moods because they’re ~cursed~ and stuff.

Drunkard

Drunkard already exists, boom de-ada.

Fool

Skill slower, drop tasks? It would be so annoying, but so right for them.

Glutton

Hunger motive decreases faster and is harder to fill up.

Guild Enemy

Pay higher prices? Somehow?

Hubris

...no idea how to blinded by hubris in TS2.

Insecure

Not socializing with sims causes mood to lower. Bad social interaction super lower mood. Sometimes wake up with low mood/nervous.

Insomniac

Wake up frequently at night. Sleep less than other sims and sometimes fall asleep just because why not.

Licentious

Mood lowers considerable if they haven’t kissed or had woohoo in a while. Boost in romance socials.

-Give Compliment Ankles flirt

Misanthrope

Mood decrease from interacting positively from other sims. Autonomously behave meanly.

Morose

Negative mood if they have a long rest.

Puny

Can’t win fights, or it’s very difficult for them. Tire easily - they work out as long as long. Would love to tie it in to Sun&Moon objects where they are quitters who quit stuff sooner. We support them. Get drunk faster?

Uncouth

Autonomously insult other sims. Using “gossip” interaction always results in relationship decrease.

Weak Constitution

Already exists, huzzah!

Dread Pirate

Rabbit hole “lead pirate raid” option with chances of finding objects. Can “collect pirate tribute” from sims - sort of like unsavory charlatan interaction.

Famous

Decent relationship boost when meeting. Friendly socials accepted more often, and friends can be kept longer without needing to contact them every four seconds. Free drinks?

Guild Connections

Discount on furniture in buy mode - better wholesale discount than previous traits? Clothing costs lower?

-Give Discuss Fashion friendly social

Herculean

Sim will become muscular and remain that way. Higher change of winning games and fights?

-Give Boast About Strength and Heroic Speech friendly socials and Brag About Strength romantic social.

Industrious

Able to give money to other sims as charity, increasing mood. Recieve larger incomes from careers?

Natural Leader

Can cheer up other sims in bad moods?

Patient

Extra lock for wants/fears?

Satiated

Hunger bar fills up easier and decreases at a slower rate.

Seductive

Romantic socials are more successful. Possible to give them a sexy red aura? idk. Maybe they can sparkle we can lean directly into the nonsense.

Strong Constitution

Impervious to lower-level sicknesses. No pentalties from drinking or eating spoiled food.

Wise

Gain experience at work faster. Win more often in games?

-Give Impart Wisdom social.