#but I really want to try get stuff out consistently in the next month or 2 if I plan it right🤞🏻

[songbirdtana]

I’ve been planning out this fic idea for at least 6 months now and with the amount of writing I’ve scraped and changed I feel like I’ve already got a complete fic, when in reality I’m only just getting into properly writing the first chapter lmao

[killerlookz]

Hiiii!

I saw your post about requesting for Joost, and idk if this is good but I'll try my best!(first time requesting something btw)

So, we all looooove some good jealousy prompts right?(or am I just weird?)

I saw some about reader being jealous and blah blah blah but how about a jealous Joost?

He isn't the type to be easily jealous he really isn't! He trusts you with his life! But... what if HE isn't enough?

He's on tour, away from you for months. He hates it but he loves it at the same time, on one side: his work is being seen, he's getting money, he's visiting other countries. But on other side... you're away from each other and it kills him.

So, one night, he just got back from a show, he showered on the hotel bathroom, he's drying his hair with a towel while he sees random stuff on insta, he sits on the fresh hotel bed when he sees one new story from you.

You're smiling and there's a friend of yours, smiling too, with a caption:"thanks for the amazing night (friend nickname) you're the best! ❤️"

And the two of you are at you favorite restaurant.

You did mentioned to joost that you were feeling lonely without him, that work was killing you and you wanted to go out... he is happy for you, of course, but... he just wishes it was HIM next to you on the photo, it was HIM that took you out. HIM that you were sending heart emojis to.

(Maybe reader and joost are dating or maybe you could do a friends to lovers on this one)

So, as soon as he's back, he's knocking on your apartment door.

He doesn't even waits, as soon as you open the door, he hugs you, he's all over you.

"Joost?! You're back already?? Oh I missed you too!"

You hug him back.

Joost lives this. This peace. This warmth. This love, his heart bursting with adoration, he wants to prove to you that he's the best, that no friend could ever replace him!

Sorry if this is not good! Anyway, thanks for even reading this!

a/n: omg thank you so much for this prompt anon! i looove a good detailed prompt, i think i stuck mainly to your request, i really only changed some dialogue to fit the story! side note... i had a lot of trouble formatting this for some reason, so hopefully this posts ok. tumbr is giving me grief lmao

Irreplaceable | Joost Klein

content: gn! reader, Joost wins Eurovision (as he should), drinking, a singular dirty joke, allusion to smut if you squint, and hickies. alternating POVS, some dutch, mostly pet names (schat, lieverd, liefje), and small phrases (ik hou van jou= i love you, het spijt me= i'm sorry)

word count: 3,630

Your fingers sweep across the glowing keyboard of your phone. The intense bright white of the display in contrast with the dark of the restaurant that surrounds you makes you lower your eyes into a squint, the letters blurring before you.

Much needed night with my girl <3

You reposition the text to fit with the picture, a half-tipsy selfie you had taken just moments prior with your best friend, Anna. Your finger hovers over the "your story" button on the bottom left corner of your screen. You do one last scan of the photo, looking at the wide grins of you and your friend, you couldn't remember the last time you had seen yourself so happy.

You tap the button, deciding the photo is worthy to be seen by your whopping 400 Instagram followers.

"Did I look hot in that?" Anna's voice pulls you away from your phone, you place it face down against the white tablecloth in front of you. She's raising an eyebrow at you as her red lipstick coated lips curl into a smirk. She swirls a nearly empty glass of red wine in her hand.

"Of course," You grin, "When do you not?"

"Good point." She winks before raising the glass to her lips, finishing what was left in a single swig.

You'd been more than grateful for Anna taking you out tonight. Truth be told, the last few weeks had been bleak. They consisted mostly of you sitting at your kitchen counter, hunched over your computer doing work. Who knew working from home could be so stressful. You'd been completely swamped ever since a co-worker who had shared your position switched companies. Now you were stuck doing double the work for the same pay.

But maybe even worse than the stress of work was the loneliness of it. Taking a remote job had seemed ideal when you accepted the position, however, now you realized it was just like working any other office job without any of the human connection or interaction.

Your life hadn't always been this lonely, but you guessed that was the price you paid for living the city life, coupled with dating a musician.

Joost had been doing music since you met him a year and a half ago, and in that short amount of time, you never would have expected how huge he would have gotten. A summer hit in Germany and a fucking Eurovision win catapulted him into success.

Of course, you were more than proud of him, in fact, words couldn't even describe how happy you were for him. He deserved each and every fan, and each and every stream.

But being a musician meant being busy, and in particular, being on tour for weeks to months at a time.

Truth be told, during these last five weeks, Joost was on tour you had been living vicariously through videos posted online of his performances, desperately wishing you were in the crowd getting to watch him do what he loved every night. You would scroll intently in the isolating darkness of your apartment, at this point you had to have seen every angle of every single performance he'd done on tour thus far. It at least helped you feel a little less alone, watching how he smiled on stage, adoring the crowd, similar to the ways he had adored you.

You'd barely left the house since Joost had started touring, but you owed everything to Anna for forcing you out tonight. You were actually enjoying yourself.

A shadow looms over you, forcing you out of your thoughts. Your head whips to the side, and your waiter is standing over you

"Whenever you're ready." He places the black leather book in the middle of the table and nods as his lips press into a tight smile before walking away.

"Dinner's on me," Anna smiles slyly, her hand darting out and swiping the check from where it lay on the table. You can't say you're shocked by her offer, she had always been generous, but your heart is warmed by her kindness.

"Oh you don't have t-"

"Yes I do," She cuts you off. "This is your night out. Remember?"

"Thank you," You grin.

"Don't mention it," she opens the book, glancing down at the check, "Oh," She looks up at you, "Zoë asked if we want to meet her, Noor, and Hanna for drinks after this. They're at that bar a few blocks away. And seeing as I drank most of this bottle of wine, I reckon you need a few more drinks in you"

Your head bobs up and down, nodding, "More drinks sounds just about perfect right now."

Moments later the waiter is coming by again, taking the check off the table.

You look down at your phone on the table, flipping it over. The screen shines bright, revealing two notifications.

Joostklein liked your story

Joostklein replied to your story: have fun, liefje <3

A smile creeps onto your face and your chest swells with a warmth that both comforts you and stings at the same time. What you would give to have him here right now. Your thumb grazes over the screen, tapping the message to respond.

"C'mon y/n" Your head flings up at the sound of Anna's voice, "I got my card back, we should get going."

You nod, standing up from your seat, slipping your still open phone into the pocket of your jacket.

Joost lay on the stiff linens of a hotel bed. The lingering scent of his shampoo filled his nose as he took a deep breath, turning over his phone to check his notifications once again. Nothing.

It had been three hours and fifteen minutes since he noticed that you saw his response to your Instagram story, three hours and fifteen minutes since you saw his response and didn't respond.

He flips his phone back down, turning to his side, the pillow is damp against his face from his freshly washed hair. He closed his eyes and thought about that picture of you, how you smiled so wide, the way your eyes twinkled. He couldn't help but smile as he thought about it, it was almost like a reflex to him. Seeing you in such a state brought him an unexplainable warmth.

However, a part of him felt weird, a strange sense of yearning as he thought about the photo, Anna so close to you, the way you thanked her, complete with a heart. Part of him hoped that that was him taking you out to eat, him getting you to smile like that. But it wasn't, and it hadn't been him in a long time, and it wouldn't be, not for a while.

Of course, the two of you shared heartfelt messages with each other every day, and phone calls whenever you could. But it wasn't the same. It wasn't the same as being right there with you in person. It was hard for him, and he knew it was hard for you too.

In an instant, he's thinking about the last phone call you shared, just yesterday, the way you'd broken down in tears to him, about your workload, about how isolated you'd been feeling. He tried to keep composed, but he knew that he was part of the reason you were crying, though you never outright blamed him. All he could do was gently coo to you on the other end of the phone, softly pleading with you to not cry, that you would be alright. Truth be told he wanted to curl up and die in that moment. He'd never forget the sound of your wavering voice, the way it cracked just before a desperate sob clawed its way out of your throat, "I just miss you so much."

Part of him wondered if you would ever get sick of this if one day you would wake up and realize you didn't want a boyfriend who was gone all the time.

He had no problem with you spending a night out with your friends, in fact, he was ecstatic that you seemed to be having a good time, it was the fact that he wasn't able to share that good time with you that led to the sinking feeling in his chest that he felt now. You having left him on seen had only added insult to injury. If he really thought about it, he'd much rather feel this jealousy than have you cooped up in your empty apartment all night.

He shook his head, rolling onto his side, damning himself for feeling so selfish right now.

He turned his phone over once more, and the time flashed in front of him, 1:47 AM. Fuck. It was later than he thought. His jealousy was completely replaced by worry, and his stomach flipped. Surely it was far too late for you to still be at dinner, you'd told him you'd text him when you got home.

Anxiety set in as he began to weigh his options, either he could call you and potentially disturb your night out, or not call you, leaving you unbothered, but leaving him worried about where you were. After all, what if something happened, he'd never forgive himself for not calling.

He unlocked his phone, scrolling his recent calls so he could call you. He swore he could hear his heart beating as the phone rang, once, twice, three, four times-

"Hmm hi mmbaby." Your words are sloppy on the other end, and for a moment Joost worries that he may have woken you up, until he clocks the combination of the stifled thumping of music, and screeches of laughter.

"Hoi schat, where are you?" His eyebrows furrow

"I am..." You trail off, "I am at a bar, like, i think. I think two blocks from the restaurant- wherever I was." You sigh.

"Are you drunk, lieverd, who's there?" Joost cringes at his words, silently cursing himself for his interrogative tone.

"Ummm... Maybe a little, or a lot" You giggle, "And um- Anna, duh, and... Hanna..." You pause to laugh for a moment, "Anna and Hanna," You repeat, obviously fascinated with the rhyme, "And Zoë and Noor."

"Okay," Joost sinks into the bed, relief washes over him when he recognizes the names of who you're with. "I don't want to bother, I just wanted to make sure you're okay." He's timid, it's unlike him to be so quiet, his words softly tip-toeing around his true feelings, feelings of how bad he wishes it could be him you were out with right now.

"Okay?" You repeat with more emphasis, "Not ok...I am great!"

"That's good to hear." He hopes his jealousy doesn't peak through his short words, it feels terrible, his stomach has tied itself up in knots and the guilt he feels for feeling this way strangles him.

He thought about the nights the two of you would go out drinking together, the way your eyes would light up when a song you liked played, you'd grip his hand tight, forcing him out up so he could dance with you. He'd always end up more drunk off his love for you than he did from the alcohol, no matter how much he drank. By the end of the night, like clockwork, the bartender would be shouting that it was last call, and Joost would stand at the bar, taking the remaining sips of his final drink. Your head would rest against his arm, eyes barely open. You'd complain your feet hurt from all the dancing you'd been doing, your voice thick with intoxication and exhaustion. As the two of you headed out, he'd let you climb on his back so he could carry you to wherever the pair of you were going. He'd love nothing more than to feel that now, to feel the comforting weight of your body against his back, to feel your arms wrapped around his neck, your head nuzzled against him, the warmth of your breath tickling the skin of his neck.

"I'm so happy," You state, and Joost can almost hear your smile through the phone. "M'so happy. Love my friends."

"Sounds like they're taking good care of you,"

"Yes, such such good care of me, don't you worry - they will have me back home in one piece."

"Goed, will you be home soon?"

"Mmmprobably, my feet huuuurt." You whine, causing Joost to let out a small chuckle, like clockwork, "Nngh- If only I had a tall, handsome, strong, dutch man, preferably one who is blonde and has a mustache and is also named Joost Klein to carry me home." You sigh loud and dramatically.

Your words sting, Joost knows you don't mean them to, but he can't help but feel a twinge in his chest at how badly he wishes he were the one taking you home.

"I'll carry you wherever you want when I get home, to make up for my absence, you won't have to walk a single step ever again."

Joost's face lights up hearing you giggle on the other end, but suddenly your laughter dies down, and you sigh once more,

"I think- I should go,"

"That's alright, get home safe, ik hou van jou"

"I love you t-,"

"Eyy," Joost cuts you off, "In Dutch."

"Ik hou ook van jou."

Joost <3: Flight was cancelled, I don't know when I'll be able to get on another, het spijt me, I was really looking forward to seeing you tonight.

It had been a whole eight weeks that Joost had been gone, and as you stared down at the text you just received, it felt like if you had were to spend one more second apart from him you might just explode.

Sure a cancelled flight may only delay you seeing your boyfriend for a few hours, maybe a day at most, you could still feel the tears welling up in your eyes. It already felt so late, you didn't want to wait anymore. You tilt your head back, blinking rapidly to fight the small droplets pooling in your waterline.

Your phone chimes again.

Joost <3: I'll see you soon, I promise, Oké?

You're barely able to read the message through your wet eyes before there's a knock at your door. You sniffle, and quickly dry your tears, confused at who would be knocking on your door at this time. You slowly rise up from your bed, walking with trepidation towards the door.

You press your chest up against the door, closing one eye tight to look through the peephole. As your gaze adjusts, you feel your heart slip down to you the stomach it couldn't be.

Quick, trembling fingers are racing to unlock the locks of your apartment door before flinging it open. It was.

There Joost was, standing before you. A grin plastered onto his face, he'd been holding something in each hand, a bouquet of flowers in one, a bottle of wine in the other, but still his arms were stretched out, inviting you in for a hug.

Before you can even think of a word to speak you're running into his arms, wrapping your own arms around his torso. The familiar warmth of his body heat fills your body.

He must be able to hear the sound of your heart from how loud its beating, or at the very least, feel its rapid pulses against his chest. You nuzzle your face against him, taking in the gentle scent of his cologne. It's so familiar, and inviting, and you feel nothing but overwhelming love as you let Joost overwhelm your senses.

"You don't know how much I've missed you." His kisses pause for a moment as he mumbles against your hair.

"I've missed you too," You strengthen your grip around his waist, "So much."

"Let me put this stuff down so I can give you a real hug, ok?"

You don't want to let go, not even for a moment, you'd spent far too long without him, and you feared if you let him go, even just for a second, he would disappear again. Reluctantly, you let your arms fall from his torso, sighing at the lack of warmth you feel as your body separates from his. He steps around you, leaning over to kiss your cheek as he passes you, "Stay here,"

"Huh?" You question, about to step forward to follow him into your apartment.

"No, no no- stay there." Joost quickly whips his head back around, moving towards the kitchen counter to place the wine and the flowers. He looks up and smiles before heading towards you.

His arms wrap around your lower back, beckoning for you to jump a little so you can put your legs around his hips and he can carry you. Once Joost had you steadily in his arms, he walked forward, letting go with one arm to quickly shut the door behind the two of you before placing it back around you once more.

"I told you, you wouldn't have to walk when I get back,"

"Hmm, won't have to or won't be able to?" You smirk as you push your body against his, laying your head on Joost's shoulder, he shakes his head, clicking his tongue.

"Such a dirty mind." He chastises

You place soft, passionate kisses against Joost's neck, slowly trailing up to his jaw, before eventually planting a kiss on his lips. He wastes no time in kissing you back, his lips hungrily going after your own. Your hands find your way into his hair, your nails softly scratching at his head as gently pull at the blonde strands.

Joost breaks the kiss so he can turn around, placing you on the kitchen counter. He stands in front of you, in between your legs, you wrap them around him in an effort to bring him closer to you. Your head flips to the side,

"Are these for me?" you pull at one of the flower petals with your thumb and pointer finger, feeling its soft velvety texture.

"Of course, and the wine. Well, I guess that's for us. I'll order us some takeaway, I know it's not as going out- but I promise I'll take you out tomorrow, I'll make up for every second I was gone," Joost's fingers gently grip your jaw, pulling you to face him. Your eyes meet his, deep and blue, filled with a light you missed all too well, "I'm sorry, liefje, for making you so lonely."

"You know that's not your fault." You tilt your head, pouting at his consolation. His words cut, how could he blame himself?

"It's okay if you say it is," His hand trails up your face, resting his palm against your jaw, his thumb rubbing soft circles into your cheek, "You can tell me."

You stare at him with wide eyes, your brain searching for the right words to properly convince him that he has done nothing wrong.

"No," You manage to whisper, "You don't know how happy it makes me to know you're performing every night, to know you're doing what you love."

"But if I wasn't gone all the t-"

"I wouldn't trade this situation for the world." You cut him off, staring at him intensely, hoping to communicate how deeply you mean your words.

"Okay," Joost concedes, his voice quiet, he was never one to fight you on things, "But one day, when I make enough money, I'll take care of you," He cranes his neck, planting a kiss against the opposite cheek of where his hand rests. The stubble of his facial hair is scratchy against your skin, in an oddly comforting way, it's familiar, and it reminds you of your close proximity. You sigh, drinking in the intimacy of the moment as his lips lower to your neck. He pulls away briefly, "You won't have to work another second and I'll take you everywhere with me."

A soft smile pulls at the corners of your mouth, and you cannot help the heat that floods your body as you picture your future together. It's a comforting picture, and it makes all the waiting, all the lonely nights worth it.

Your hand reaches out, tugging at the thick fabric of his sweatshirt, attempting to pull him even closer to you, like you wanted your bodies to intertwine, to fuse and become one so you'd never have to be without him again.

"I can't wait," Your words are short, your breath getting caught in your throat as Joost nips at your neck. His lips are soft, soothing the tingling pinch of his teeth against your skin.

His breath is hot, and each kiss is filled with an ardent longing. Warmth spreads through your stomach as his hand slips to the back of your neck, his fingers thread through the strands of your hair, before tugging gently, careful not to hurt you. But it is enough to make your breathing shaky and you wonder if you're even going to get to break open that bottle of wine anytime soon.

You hope he leaves a mark against your neck, you hoped he'd leave many. If you were in any space to talk, you'd speak up and tell him as much, begging for a pretty purple and red reminder of where he'd been.

As much as you ached for it, you didn't really need a mark to remind you of his love for you. You knew every word he spoke was true, how he'd make up for every second he spent without you, how as soon as he had the means to he'd provide fully for you. It was obvious, his love was warm, it was soft, it was something completely irreplaceable.

a/n: hiii!! wow my first time writing for Joost, I haven't written rpf in awhile, so i hope i did it justice! and thank you so much again anon for the request, i hope it is to your liking :-)

[vpzllx]

WAYNE MCCULLOUGH

warnings ✩° : mentions of being hurt, mentions of fighting scars, mentions of fighting, slight argument?, little angst?, wayne being .. wayne.

pairing ✩° : wayne mccullough x fem!reader

authors note ✩° : hey guys.. i’m back after sm months but i’ll try to be consistent, i need to get back on the grind...

You sat, on your friend’s bed facing her. The silence in the room is so loud even though no one’s speaking, To break the silence you speak up “Why does it even matter that i’m with him?” you say in a loud voice “How does that affect you?!, Plus you hardly even know him. He’s genuinely a really good guy” you say in an upset tone, You stare at your friend for a few hoping she’ll speak up .. she finally does eventually “It matters because i don’t want you getting hurt! What point in that don’t you understand?”

You see the hurt in her eyes, For a second you feel bad but you choose not to let your feelings take over “He’s a bad guy. If he wasn’t then he wouldn’t just go around beating people up then would he?” she says with a questioning look on her face hoping you’d answer her question. “Listen, You’re my friend it doesn’t matter about who he is or not and if you can’t let me be happy and accept him then..” You look down at the bed trying not to face her “That’s the end of being friends.” You get up off her bed and grab all your stuff “Seriously?! all this over Wayne? Cmon y/n it was never that serious” you tune her out and leave the room. Heading home after all that, you feel hurt on the walk home questioning what you’ve just done but you end up brushing it off.

Later — It’s late at night around 10PM .. You lay in your bed scrolling on your phone until you hear a bang at your window. Frighted you slowly get off your bed and approach the window, Lo and behold it was your boyfriend Wayne. You open the window and stick your head outside “Yo! What the fuck are you doing?” you say with a smile on your face. “I don’t know, what does it look like i’m doing” Wayne responds in a sarcastic manner, You roll your eyes “i’ll be down in a sec to let you in” You then bring your head back in through the window and close the window shut. You happily go downstairs to open the door for him, “Where have you been all day? Haven’t seen you in class or at lunch .. or at all” you say to him as you grab his hand and lead him upstairs to your room

“Well i don’t know i jus’ didn’t really feel like showin’ up today” he says looking at you “I wanted you to be there.. I needed you to be there.” You sigh and hold his hand “I got into a slight argument with F/N after school today .. it was about you” Wayne’s turns to you visibly more intrigued with the story “Okay … It was about me what happened ..?” he says to you, Turning your head to face him “Well she kinda told me to not be with you anymore because your supposedly a “bad guy” and i didn’t like her talking about to like that so i kinda dropped her..?” “You didn’t have to do that for me. You know i don’t care about what ya friends think of me as long as your happy i’m fine with it” he says squeezing your hand tighter “yeah but .. i wasn’t okay with it. You mean a lot to me you know that right?” you graze his face with your hand “And you mean a lot me too” he says cupping your face, he pulls your face closer to his.

You feel his soft lips brush against yours, You lean into the kiss and you practically melted. Your hand was on his face, his hands held onto your waist, You took you hands off his face and brought it underneath his shirt feeling all his scars, You hate it when he fights because even though he still ends up “winning” he still gets hurt in the end but It was hot you had to admit. He brought you over to your bed, then you broke away from the kiss “Nuh uh my parents are home you know better than that” you laugh, Wayne rolls his eyes “Cmon that’s not even fair. First you tease me then deny me a good time” you smirk at him “maybe next time”. You lay in bed with him cuddled up together, you look up at him “I love you, Y/N,” he says breathily. A smile slowly appears on your face “I love you, Wayne”. He kisses your forehead, Wayne .. Even if i lost all of my friends it wouldn’t matter to me really because i’d still have you, Your not a bad guy.. You’re a good guy who does bad things. Wayne fell asleep in your arms, you noticed that you’ve been talking to yourself the whole time, you chuckle and kissed the top of his head.

[continuumitgirl]

hi!!

so i’ve known ab subliminals, manifesting, shifting for a while, but always had minimal success. i was never able to get the ‘big’ things i wanted.

but since being on tumblr, i learnt about STATES. which i had previously known about when i had read the power of awareness by neville goddard. unfortunately, that didn’t last long as i started watching manifesting gurus on youtube and got clouded with information again. (no hate to sammy ingram) But i watched her a lot. and i never got that much movement even tho i was consistent, it would make me feel guilty if i was t affirming enough. and i would beat myself up, saying to myself “if u really want this, u need to affirm more”. i would do the 10k challenge, 10 min stuff, but it was soooo overwhelming. so much stress because i wanted so many things, and i felt like i didn’t have enough time, i had other stuff to do, so even tho i was consistent, i would stress myself out, wondering if i was doing enough, doing it right, etc.

this mindset was toxic, although i didn’t realise it then. i just would get so upset because i trying to hard. which is why it also took me a min to realise.. that i shouldn’t be trying that hard to get something … u either have it or u don’t! so anyways, one or two weeks ago, i came on here because i was done. i wanted my desires. enough. At first i got swayed by the void stuff, which made me put it on a pedestal . which made me angry, i was like bro not this shit again. i don’t wanna waste another months or years. and somehow i stumbled across states. i’ll admit it took me a second to grasp. i re read the power of awareness. and realised it is simple, once i understood it, i deleted tumblr and focused on my life, while occupying my ideal state.

One thing that i’ve been wanting a lot is to travel this year. I travelled last year a bit with my friend and spent 3 months in another country during the summer and it was phenomenal: i wanted this again for 2023. I want to live my life yk.

Well this morning my mum woke me up to tell me we are going on 2 holidays. one next month and one in easter. Athens, Greece and Verona and Venice, Italy.

i was like omg this is amazing ?? we had talked a bit about it and every time we did i was like “yes. we’re going” in my head. and today we booked those holidays.

Now what’s so special about this? Well i made a pinterest board end of 2022 with places i wanna go def this year!! every time i looked at this board i was like “it’s done” [just the way i think ab every desire, because it is done, it’s mine, it literally comes from my consciousness so it’s inseparable to me]

and yeah!! i have 2 other places on this pinterest board but it’s literally the 31st of January 2023 rn and we’ve already booked for 2 of them so that’s a fucking success. i’m so confident more than ever about my power and how the 3D truly is just a reflection of my consciousness/ state i dwell on often!!!!!

yeah as u can see i literally have athens, venice, paris and amsterdam pics on here as a vision board :))))

i want to thank @0t0mie @lotusmi and @angelsinluv (also to twitter users that explanation states v well and posted motivating content . i don’t rlly use twitter for loa stuff cus my irl friends follow me there but there’s a community over there i would lurk on that encouraged states and helped me understand that the mindless affirming in aim to TRY and get ur manifestation was pointless)

anyways i cannot wait to post more loa success stories. this way of manifesting not only makes so much sense once u grasp it. it literally is so fucking easy and effortless 😩 cannot believe it took me this look to figure it out but honestly its fine. my desires are already mine now. that’s all that matters 😎💪

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

[submitted 4/24/2024; 📂 for later reference]

WIBTA for reporting teachers to my school principal on the basis of the quality of their teaching?

Hello! For context, my school follows K-12 and I'm in my 2nd to last year (G11). Where I live (I don't know if it's the same for other countries) we all have to get into a track, and each track usually has its own teaching staff led by appointed coordinators who report to the principal every month or so regarding the performance of the teachers under them, though I've heard of some teaching in two or even three other tracks. This information will be important later on.

My first class in the morning is literature, more specifically 21st century literature, and it's taught by Mrs. G. The first thing that gave me a hint that the English-based subjects wouldn't be as great as I hoped was the fact that she was a nursing student. (It's on her Facebook profile. Nearly everyone I know in school posts concerningly detailed stuff about themselves on Facebook, and I just use it for the Messenger...)

Second or third in the morning on a normal school day is Ms. C. She's a DOST scholar which doesn't bother me in the slightest, but out of all the staff that handles the track I'm in, she's the only one who handles two subjects: Statistics and Reading & Writing, another English-based subject, one she doesn't have any certification for. (Again, from Facebook.)

Still, I know well that our system isn't perfect so I sat through their lessons. I was the kid that read a lot of books so I consistently scored high, but I noticed after reading a bit of DepEd learning plans that my classmates and I weren't getting the most out of their lessons for the competencies we were supposed to achieve - for literature, we needed exposure to representative texts from each continent, and for R&W, we were supposed to learn types of reading (archetypal, sociological, etc) earlier. The kindest I can say about them regarding their teaching is that they're deviating from the learning plans in a bad way + spoonfeeding the classes without making them think critically which I know is an important skill when it comes to their subjects.

I later learned from my mom who used to teach at my school that they're still able to hold their positions because they, for lack of a better word, bribe the coordinator with food and a bit of guilt-tripping since some of them are related to him, all to stay in the staff of my track because it's the most convenient one (2nd floor, one hall only). And the coordinator has let it happen for how many years already. It's a matter that should've been reported to the school principal and the division office, but I guess nobody's really had the guts to try and fix this for the sake of the quality of our learning.

I'm going to feel really guilty if I took up on that though. Mrs. G just gave birth this year and needs the salary to provide for her son, and Ms. C doesn't want to give up R&W so she can have enough teaching load + to keep staying in the staff of my track where it's safest to avoid her possibly abusive boyfriend, from what I've heard over the year. I want to do something, not out of malice, but out of concern that the next G11 batch wouldn't learn those 2 subjects and the necessary skills for them properly (because not all of them can afford to self-study).

So, WIBTA?

[bagopucks]

J. Hughes - A Little Funky

✄————————————

Jack Hughes x OCD!reader

Word Count: 2.6k

Warning(s): possibly triggering content to those who do have OCD. Mentions of blood, angst, resisting compulsions.

This one’s for all my OCD people! Your struggle is just as valid even if it’s not always as visible as others’.

Next thing I’m working on is a Quinn request!

—————————————

“Why do you do that?”

It caught me off guard the first time Jack asked. I looked up from my menu. Fear struck my heart in concern that I’d already ruined our first date.

“Do what?”

“You blink like..” he paused, mimicking the action. The way I blinked hard. The way my head tilted occasionally with the force I needed to get my eyelids to close just right.

I let out a quiet sigh.

“Why do you do that?” He restated his question.

“‘Cause I’m just a little funky, Jack.” He didn’t need to know. Not yet. It would scare him off. So instead, I phrased it as a joke. But Jack was far more observant than I gave him credit for at first.

It wasn’t the first time my mental health interfered on a date. Or even that date with Jack. After dinner, we had gone back to his place and agreed to spend a bit more time together.

The night had simply gone too well to part so soon.

“What do you wanna watch?”

I shrugged at Jack’s question. I quickly sat down next to him on the couch, leaning into his side as Jack scrolled through a streaming service. I counted the seconds it took for the app to flick down from one section to the next. Lost in thought as he tried finding a movie.

“Stop.” My urgency made Jack raise a brow.

“You wanna watch Corey Carson?”

“No- no.. go back up.” I shook my head, and watched as Jack scrolled up to the previous section.

“Wednesday?”

“It’s wrong now.” I reached for the remote. Jack’s confusion only doubled. I was strategic in my continuation of the scrolling. Only when we got to the bottom of the page and restarted at the top, did I allow Jack to have control over the remote again.

“What was that?”

I never knew how to explain it to him. I didn’t know how to make him understand that my brain just worked a little different than his. I hated to keep him in the dark, but I thought it was safer for us both to keep it as such.

Our ‘talking’ stage consisted of a lot of great moments, with those occasional interruptions sneaking in.

Interruptions that would leave Jack questioning my habits all day, and leave me feeling like I was walking on thin ice.

“Jack baby…I love you.”

“I love you too.”

A beat.

“Jack- Jack..” I tried to stop myself. “Jack, listen.” He looked at me, trying to walk out the door to go to a game. “I love you.”

“I know.”

“You have to say it back now.”

“I already did.”

I could sense myself getting frustrated with him and upset with myself.

“I gotta go.. okay?”

I nodded, but my mind wouldn’t let it go.

“Jack.” I called his name as he opened the door. He quickly looked back at me.

“I love you.”

“I love you too! Jesus..”

“I’m sorry.”

I didn’t know why it had to be like that. Why my mind had to work the way it did. It scared multiple people off, and I was always afraid of losing Jack because of it.

Eventually, months into our real relationship, I sat Jack down to speak with him on the matter. It was only after I could no longer hide it, that we had the talk.

What I didn’t expect was him to be so relieved and accepting when I told him.

“We should really talk about what’s going on.” I cringed as I looked up at Jack from his bed. He looked exhausted from his game. I was equally exhausted from getting up every ten minutes to check if I turned the stove off.

“What’s going on?” I knew what was coming.

“All of this stuff. It’s different. It’s just- you say you love me a million times, and you have all these.. these off behaviors.” I could tell he didn’t want to offend, but that was really the only way for him to describe it.

I slowly sat up, patting the empty space on the bed beside myself.

“Jack please don’t be mad.”

“God I’m not gonna be mad, just please tell me you’re not a psychopath.” He huffed as he dropped onto the bed, pulling his legs up and shimming until he was next to me.

Some might argue I was a psychopath. Some days that’s how it felt.

“It’s OCD. It’s a disorder- it’s just.. it’s really hard to live with sometimes, and I know projecting it on you doesn’t help. I’m really sorry.”

“It’s what?”

“Obsessive compulsive disorder. It’s when you obsess over certain things, and then you have physical or mental compulsions. Like triggered behaviors or actions that help calm you down.”

“Like saying I love you five thousand times?” Jack eyed me with uncertainty.

“Yeah. I get nervous that you’ll leave and maybe..” I hated talking about it.

“Maybe, what?”

“I don’t know. Like what if you leave and then get hurt? Or die? And I never told you that I loved you. Or maybe telling you that I loved you would save you from that fate.”

We spoke for what felt like hours on the topic. Jack asked as many questions as he could, and tried his best to understand.

We both realized that the best form of understanding came with time.

When we moved in together, Jack had a load of time to form an understanding.

———���——

“Hun?” I heard his voice from the bedroom, groggy and confused. I didn’t answer though, staring down at my hands splayed out on the counter top, sobbing quietly as I had convinced myself that my circulation was being cut off.

“Baby?” There was rustling in the bedroom, before the bathroom door opened and in came Jack, in a pair of shorts and no shirt.

“Aw damn..” the disappointment in his tone made my heart break. “Hey, it’s okay.. what’s up?” Jack slipped behind me, carefully wrapping his arms around my torso. He eyed my face, and after a moment he put the pieces together. “Your hands?” We’d been here before.

Jack moved his hands down the expanse of my arms, resting them on top of my own on the cool counter top.

“Don’t look at ‘em. They’re gonna be the same color and feel the exact same way in five or ten minutes.” Jack whispered. He pressed a gentle kiss to my collar. “Gotta relax for me, baby.

I always had issues obsessing over my health. One of said compulsions was the consistent checking of a body part and another was Google searching. In this case, limiting the amount of checking I could actually do, was supposed to help. To show me and my thoughts that I was okay.

At first, I hated giving in to Jack. I hated that his methods never felt like they helped. I hated him because in those moments I felt safer checking myself than not. I couldn’t understand why he wanted me to be hurt.

Over time I began to understand better, that he was helping. I just didn’t like it because it was a good method.

I breathed out a sigh eventually, leaning back into Jack’s chest and nodding to him. “I’m good now.”

There were other days when my OCD got the best of both of us. When Jack struggled between giving in and pushing my limits. When he never quite knew what to do or say.

“I can’t wait to be home.”

“Yeah.. my feet hurt.” I mumbled, eyeing the tile floor of the mall as we neared the door. I had been counting my steps. I made Jack start over with me in three different stores. I think the only reason he agreed was to not ruin my day. But it seemed since it was coming to an end, he was trying to not be as lenient. The second we got to the door, I stopped and turned to go back. Jack gripped my hand tightly.

“We can’t do it again, hun.” I looked back at Jack with wide eyes. His own baby blues responded with a sympathetic look.

“Jack, please.” I squeezed his hand.

“You can do it.” He encouraged, but I wasn’t sure if I could.

“Jack it’s not an even number.” Odd numbers usually meant somebody might die in my head. Jack knew that.

“Who is it?” He spoke softly. He held his free hand out and I slowly stepped into his arms.

“Ellen.” I whispered nervously.

“We can call her when we get home.”

I broke down into tears for the hour long ride. By the time we got into the house, Jack already had Ellen’s number pulled up. When she didn’t answer, he realized his mistake and I was devastated.

Those were learning moments for both Jack and I. He tried to work past his mistake, and I had to wait longer to speak with Ellen. Who had ended up being fine nonetheless.

Jack and I weren’t a perfect couple, and there were nights when I know he got just as frustrated with me as I did with myself. I hated to put that stress on him, but I learned over time that he was not going anywhere.

“Why can’t I just be in here with you? I wanna hang out.” Frustration seeped out of his tone.

“Because I said so, Jack.” I mumbled, barely giving him the time of day with my words, much less my eyes.

One of the things I hated most were the intrusive thoughts I occasionally got about him. The ones that broke my heart, because no matter what they were, I could never live with the thought of myself hurting Jack.

I never wanted to be around him when one came about. Especially because I was always afraid. It was something I never told him, and he never understood.

“Please?”

“No, Jack. Please go call Nico or somebody else. I wanna be alone right now.”

He’d huff and he’d puff, but damn he never went away.

“I’ll be back in a half an hour.”

He was always adamant on checking in on me. He knew when it was my OCD. I had little tells he was good at picking out.

Intrusive thoughts were not the only reason I avoided Jack at times. I also struggled to be around him when he had a cut or broken skin somewhere that was touchable. I was lenient about it being beneath clothing, but on a hand or his face, parts of his arms they weren’t covered by t-shirts, or his legs where they wouldnt be covered by shirts- then I had an issue.

Jack didn’t have diseases by any means. Maybe yaps-a-lot-itus, but other than that, he was fine. That didn’t stop me from getting extra tense when the moment arose where I could have gotten his blood on me. When Jack tried to fight me on that, we usually got into fights.

“Would you at least cuddle with me?”

I hadn’t kissed him for days, not since he busted his lip.

“Jack I can’t. It’s not-“

“There’s nothing wrong with me! I’m fine!”

We could both be emotional in these times. Jack hated to be neglected, and he hated knowing there was nothing he could do to help me. I hated hurting him, and I hated knowing I was helpless against my own mind.

“Please be patient with me?”

“I’m trying!”

If, or when I did get the courage to lay with him, I kept an arguably safe distance. Sometimes Jack would coax me into hand holding, and sometimes he wouldn’t.

There were other nights however, when all I wanted was to be in Jack’s arms. When I’d focus too much on a chest pain or the sound of my own heartbeat. When I’d convince myself I had a heart problem or something major was wrong.

“I really need you to tell me how bad it hurts.” Jack whispered as I sobbed into his chest, his arms wrapped so tightly around me that one might assume I was actually dying. Moments like these always scared the shit out of Jack.

“Baby, I really need to know. If we need to go to the hospital then we need to go now.” Jack tried. I tried to get ahold of my wandering thoughts, trying and failing to communicate with him.

“Come on. You gotta have something for me. One out of ten.. how bad is it?”

He moved one of his hands to trail through my hair.

“Two or three?”

I felt silly for sobbing over a pain that was only two or three on the scale, but that simple confession helped my mind come to its first realization. And it helped Jack relax.

“That’s not bad…” Jack sighed out. “Where’s it hurt? Can you show me?” He slowly pulled away. I looked up at him and swallowed before I reached up to press a hand to the center of my chest, then around my abdomen.

“What’s it feel like?”

I felt myself becoming choked up again. I couldn’t explain it. I let out a strangled sob.

“Hey, hey.. it’s okay.” Jack took my face in his hands, and wiped away the trails of tears. “Is it a sharp pain? Or a dull one, like a soreness? Or does it burn, maybe?”

“It burns..” Jack was always so good at helping me organize what I thought and felt. So good at helping me communicate when I didn’t know how to.

“That’s it?” He asked as if it was nothing. Somehow hearing his nonchalance also relaxed me.

“Baby.. we ate a few hours ago.” Jack whispered, continuing to wipe my tears away. “It’s probably just heartburn.” He leaned forward and pressed a kiss to my head. “I get it sometimes too. Feels all uncomfortable in your stomach and your chest? Kinda tight or burning?” I nodded to confirm that he was correct. “Yeah. It’s just heartburn. It’ll go away, just give it some time. If it doesn’t, we’ll go to the pharmacy and grab some pills.”

I was slow to nod in agreement of his plan. Jack pulled me back into his arms, whispering soft assurances and conversation starters. Some that I answered and some that I didn’t.

Occasionally that pain would grab my attention again, and a new wave of fear would strike, but Jack was one step ahead of it. Always one step ahead.

I rolled over in his arms, my back pressed firmly to his chest. One of Jack’s hands was hidden beneath my shirt, thumb rubbing gently back and forth across the skin of my stomach. I could feel his breath on the back of my neck.

“You’re safe right here.” He whispered. “Safe as you could possibly be. It’ll go away before you even wake up in the morning.” He pressed a kiss to my shoulder.

“I’m so sorry, Jack.” I mumbled.

“For what?” He shifted, propping himself up on an elbow and looking down at me. I couldn’t bring myself to look at him though.

“For being so hard to handle.” My voice quivered.

“Hey,” he cooed. “Hey, no.” He laid back down and wrapped himself around me, slipping one of his legs stubbornly between my own. Even though I insisted it was a weird position. “You’re just a little funky.. remember?“

I scoffed at his recollection of the first time we ever spoke.

Jack and I may have gone through so much together, but I realized that it was easier to tackle with him, than without him.

“Maybe a lotta funky.. but I still love you.”

✾❀✾❀✾❀✾❀✾❀✾❀✾❀✾

[misty--nights]

I'm working on another Dead Boy Detectives fic rather than work on my actual college stuff and it's got me thinking bout Niko and luck. Spoilers for the whole show, of course.

I find it fascinating how Niko keeps stumbling upon all these situations that seem like they have nothing to do with anything, only for her to find the key to whatever problem they encounter next in said random situation. It's a pretty consistent, too, that she seems to walk a line between bad and good luck. Like something bad will happen to her, only for that to be immediately offset by something really good that she found by chance. It's honestly kind of wild at times.

So, when we first meet Niko, she's being possessed by parasites that want to explode her, which doesn't seem very lucky. Except, that somehow the girl who moves across the girl just so happens to be with a couple of ghosts who can save her. Just in the nick of time, too. And at first that doesn't seem like that big of a deal. It's what the boys do, right? It makes sense they saved her just in time because that's what they do, and that's the kind of show this is. But this bad luck / good luck thing keeps happening to her until the end of the show.

In episode 4, she goes with the gang to the lighthouse and goes off on her own to talk to the gift shop lady. She doesn't find what it is that is drowning the people, but she does find information about the Washer Woman and about Lilith, which at the time seems to her and the others like just random information. She then goes to find the red sea glass and gifts it to Edwin on a whim, without knowing what it can do for them. She just finds it, like it's nothing, when later we see Tragic Mick spend so much time by the shore looking for one, and we see how hard it is. And I know they say in the show that only those who really need her can find the Washer Woman, but out of all four of them, Niko doesn't seem to be the one who needs the Washer Woman the most, as we see when Crystal is the one who receives a personalized riddle thing. Which, again, is something that will be super important later and Crystal gains that knowledge thanks to Niko just stumbling upon the key to finding the Washer Woman on accident.

Then, in episode 5, she just happens to stumble upon Jenny's secret admirer and manage to set up a date with them. Now, I know. I know Maxine is actually a stalker that ends up trying to kill Jenny, bad luck. Except nothing really happens to her there? @carpediemma has a post where she says that the floor was most likely dirty because she promised Jenny to clean the floors for a month if the date went wrong and Jenny was sort of banking on it being bad. With Niko's track record with luck, I think that is very possible. Again, bad luck / good luck situation. The date she sets up is ruined because Maxine tries to kill Jenny, but because she made the bet and Jenny fully believed the date wouldn't work, Maxine slips and fall.

Episode 6 might be a bit of a stretch. Technically, it's Crystal's decision to go to Tragic Mick's in search for some way to get rid of David, but it's thanks to Niko that she actually gets the heart gem thingy. So, bad luck there, because the gem takes away all of Crystal's powers. However, and this links back to episode 4 again, it's thanks to her finding the sea glass that eventually Crystal has the way to start discovering her real abilities.

In episode 7 she stays with the Night Nurse while Charles goes to hell and Crystal goes to find David. She starts reading the Night Nurse's book as a way to find something about her dad. Nothing she finds there would be useful for contacting, seeing or bringin him back. However, she does manage to stumble upon the exact passage she needed to buy Edwin and Charles some time after they get back from hell. And yes, maybe you could say that she read the whole book during the time Charles was gone, but I doubt it. We don't know how long exactly it takes Charles to find Edwin and return, but we do know it can't be that long, because the Night Nurse keeps insisting she can't keep the doorway open for long. I think at most he would have been gone 40 minutes, and that's me being generous. It's enough time for Crystal to confront David and come back. In any case, I don't think it's enough for her to carefully read the whole book front to back, no matter how good her reading comprehension is, specially if she was looking for something specific, like something about where her dad ended up in. I think it's more likely that she just found the page with the loophole she would need by chance, read it, filed it in her memory for a "just in case" and continued looking for what she wanted.

Finally, in episode 8, we have the whole Lilith thing that was set up in episode 4. She finds about her and files it as an irrelevant detail, until she hears Tragic Mick talk about Esther's deal and tells Crystal how she can contact Lilith, which ends up saving Crystal and the boys at the final confrontation. Besides that, though, there's the whole bear figure that Tragic Mick gives her and the explosion at Jenny's shop. In the explosion, Esther takes Charles and Edwin (bad), but neither her nor Jenny, the two living people in the shop at the time, are really injured in the commotion (good.)

And then the bear thing. In episode 7, she hears his story and tells him how they found the Washer Woman, and he can't find a piece of red sea glass of his own. Even though he is really desperate for a way to find her. (which, again, it's odd Niko is the one to find the Washer Woman when she wasn't that in need for the Washer Woman's assistance. The whole group was, but it was Niko who found her, but anyways). He gifts her the bear figure as a way to thank her for trying to help and they move on from that. And she accepts it and goes to Esther's place with Crystal, convinced of the protection of the bear, and then dies to save Crystal. Except she doesn't really? She's fine at the end, in some sort of frozen land, with Litty and Kingham, and by the way she holds the bear figure, it's implied that's what sort of saved her, even if she is no longer tied to the mortal plane.

I don't know, there was no real point behind this, just something I've been thinking about for a while. I think if someone has a shot at helping Tragic Mick return to sea, it's her, because she just has the luck to find solutions she wasn't even looking for. And I'm convinced if she ever makes it back to Port Townsend, that's just what she would do. On accident, but still. That's just the kind of character she is to me.

[thestarfishinjootsoffice]

Hiii can I request the slashers x teen! Reader who has Short curly hair but is insecure about it so they straighten it

(I don't care about the type of curly hair it can be up to you but if you want to add one can it be 3c💖)

As a person who has straight hair and literally no one else in my life has curly hair and I've never used a straightener in my life. I'm sorry if I get anything wrong. Just correct me!

I'll try to post more consistently I SWEAR THIS TIME!!!

Also extremely sorry for the pov changes, I change the pov writing depending on the characters if this bothers you please let me know.

Apology for disappearing on you guys for 3-2 months 😍

Warnings: reader being pretty insecure about their hair, they're straightening their hair 24/7 here apparently. Not much stuff.

Slashers included: Michael, billy and stuu and jasonnn

Relationship: platonic.

Slashers x teen! Reader who's insecure about their short curly hair! (3c)

Michael

He didn't really care at first how your really curly hair suddenly goes straight the next days and after. And just when it started to curl more it goes straight again.

At first he thought you straightened it because it must've been in your way or maybe you felt hot?

But inevitably it was a repeating pattern he saw. On really rare occasions you let your curls show in its true glory.

But he didn't really do anything about it or care because... Why would he? He's got people to kill.

......

That night he sat down on the couch with you. The electricity went out just before you could've straightened your hair. It was getting more puffy and curly.

Tugging on the ends of your hair to make it look a bit straight. (And also to distract yourself from looking noticeably nervous.) You stayed still uncomfortably as Michael sat eerily silent next to you as he always does. But he was sitting while looking at you so it was especially creepy.

"Uhm... Did I do something wrong?"

The only source of light was the burning candle slowly melting. Giving it a nice look.

The fact he didn't answer for a few minutes freaked you out even more. Suddenly the floor and literally everywhere else where Michael isn't in your line of sight looks interesting.

You jump a little when you feel a hand on yours where you were tugging on your hair and lift it down.

You look over to the mask of Michael and stare into the black sockets of the holes where his eyes should be visible. He points to your hair and then he gives a thumbs up. It was a bit slow, but he was telling you he really meant it.

At this point you don't even know how to feel. Your apathetic seemingly emotionless psychotic serial killer father figure was telling you that he thinks your hair looks good?

You feel a couple tears prickly at your eyes. Feeling a slight burning sensation in your throat and nose. Without much of a thought running through your hair you hug him, he absolutely does not like physical contact of course but right now he feels like the most safest person at the moment.

(Ps: *whispers* he loves your hairrrrr)

Billy n stu

It was without a doubt they love your hair but you still decided to be a teenager.

Setting your straightener on your table with a 'thud' sound, You stare at how your hair looks in the mirror. Sighing slightly you move yourself from your chair and head down stairs to your two psycho dads.

Stu was the one to immediately point it out after he saw you, "hey y/n! Why do you always straighten your hair?"

Whatever excuse-answer you gave them they weren't completely convinced but didn't want to push you any further. Well Billy did. Stu is just.... Stu. (Stu was stopped luckily)

After the day went by and you were in your bed. Today wasn't so bad. You were planning to either sleep and hope when you wake up it's not a bad day Or just burn your eyes with your phone in the dark.

Just when you were about to lie down you heard your door creek ajar. You turn your head around and see your dads just standing there in front of your door. They both looked kind of nervous.

You were about to ask a question but billy walked up next to you, setting himself down on the mattress of your bed you feel it dip a bit. Stu followed closely behind. Billy gently places a hand on your shoulder.

"What's this interrogation?"

"Uh- well we wanted to talk to you about something." Stu smiles though it looks a bit forced.

"... Well what is it?"

"Well... Do you like your hair??"

"... You made it seem so intense, and all you wanted to ask was if I liked my hair or not?" You honestly thought they were going to say the cops were outside or something. Not asking you that.

"Yes, now answer the question." Billy said it looking directly at you. If it were in a nutshell he would've probably had a gun pointed at you.

You were debating whether or not you wanted to be truthful.

"I guess so..." Your answer sounded extremely doubtful and uncertain. Which of course wasn't gone unnoticed by the two killers attending by you.

"Y/n.." Billy said softly.

"What's wrong?"

His question was met with an agonizing short but seemingly endless streak of silence. Both the men in the room already knew what was wrong but wanted to hear it from your mouth.

Stu sighed, he leaned against you.

"Y/n, if there's anyone who's bothering you , you can always tell us. If not... Then I'll teach my teenage child that they can't rebel love against their hair."

You smiled at this.

For them to act so serious on something so small...

You realised all your energy has disappeared and right now you want to shut your mind and body down for a couple hours.

Jason (let's just say there's electricity in one of the cabins)

He didn't understand. Didn't understand why you seemed to always straighten your hair. He loved the way your hair just bundles up into curly twirly shapes.

He does love your straight hair but he loves your natural hair even more. He tries hard not to let it get to him but overtime it starts to curious him greatly.

Another day of hunting down rabbits or other small creatures or going swimming for you to survive. Jason doesn't need it but eats whatever you make because who doesn't like sitting down eating their child's home cooked meal?

You noticed your hair had started to get more puffy. Feeling a wave of discomfort and insecurity you start to head to where your room was.

"Hey dad, I'm just gonna do something real quick."

Nodding he went to grab the vegetables and other ingredients while he waited for you. 5 minutes nothing. 10 minutes also nothing. After 5 minutes he went to check up on you but then you barged out of your door.

"Sorry! It took longer than i thought it would."

The first thing he noticed about you was your now straightened hair. He frowned in the inside of his mask he stared for a while

"Is something wrong? Did I take too long?"

He shook his head slightly. He turned around and lead you to the kitchen.

---------

He placed the empty dirty plate and bowl in the sink as he watched you clean the table.

His eyes lingered on the back of your hair. He takes a few silent steps next to you and waits until you either notice him or finish cleaning. He was pretty nervous if he was being honest. But it's not like he can't do anything about this kind of thing.

"Okay I'm do-" You had 3 jump scares and 5 heart attacks that you managed to keep inside you when you turned around and see your masked huge behemoth of a father right. Next. To your face. You back up a bit.

"Do you need something?" You asked with a nervous smile and laugh. He doesn't say anything for a few seconds but he raises both of his hands, tbh rn. You're pretty fucking scared even though he's technically your father he's never done something like this before.

His hands are on the sides of your hair and then he starts scrunching them. The ends of your hairs directly lying on his palms and he starts squeezing them softly for a second, letting go and repeating it again.

It takes you a hot minute to even have an idea of what he was trying to do but then you realised he was trying to curl them up! You don't do anything. You don't even know what to do. You look at him speechless after he's done.

Your hair is probably really messy and uneven right now but you can't pay it that much mind when he gives you an ok sign.

Before you could react he has you in a crushing hug. You don't really mind how strong it was this time though. Just the warm feeling of your father's bone crushing hug.

_________________

Wanted to write for Hannibal but didn't know wtf he would do 💀

[bell4lan]

Loving Albedo

Genre: Fluffy smut

DNI: fujoshis, mlm/nblm fetishizers, non-mlm/nblm, trans fetishizers

CW: NSFW, belly bulge, fingering, protected sex, first time, you eat him out lol, probably ooc I apologize, feminine language used for Albedo's privates

Character(s): Top Male Reader x Bottom Trans Albedo

You and Albedo had been together for about 7 months and man, those 7 months were amazing. You guys were completely and utterly in love with each other. Dates usually consisted of helping him with experiments, painting, eating out, or even just commissions. You guys have done just about everything together!

...except one thing...

You guys have never had sex. Like ever.

Albedo wasn't comfortable with the idea yet. You know he's trans yes, but he's still a bit insecure. He's scared his dysphoria will ruin the mood or him being born female will turn you off (even though you've told him multiple times you were fine with it). The furthest you've gone was making out and to be honest, you were fine with it. You didn't want to pressure Albedo into doing something he didn't want to do, though you had to admit, sometimes you REALLY wanted to fuck him (but you'd keep that to yourself).

However, recently Albedo has been thinking about it. A LOT. Thinking about how you'll fuck him, how you'd treat him, how it'd feel. He may or may not have touched himself to those thoughts- He's been planning how to tell you he's ready to go further, but whenever he's presented with the chance to do it he chickens out.

Today won't be like the others though. Todays THE day. Todays the day that Albedo tells you he wants to take the relationship further. He won't be backing out this time. You were out doing a commission and he was in dragonspine trying to do some work to get his mind off it and calm down. Keyword trying...he couldn't focus at all. He was so nervous about how you'd respond, constantly thinking of the right thing to say and how to say it. You've always treated him with kindess and love, but that insecurity still sneaks up on him.

After a couple hours Albedo decided to put everything away and head home. Fuck. This meant it was time to do it. His palms were sweaty and he was freaking out internally, though if anyone looked at him they'd think he's just deep in thought. Entering your shared home he puts his stuff down and sees you making dinner in the kitchen.

"Hello love, how was work?" You ask not looking back at him.

"It was...fine. I didn't do much today." He answered quietly. You noticed his change in behavior and looked back at him. Albedo always told you what he did at work in detail even if he didn't do anything exciting because he loved his work and was happy to share it with you.

"Are you alright?" You asked him. Albedo was caught off guard by your question. Was he really being that obvious? He wasn't planning on telling you until after dinner and he definitely wasn't prepared right now.

Quickly looking away he says, "Yeah, I'm fine. I'd just like to talk to you about something when we're finished eating."

"...Alright." You reply with your eyebrow raised. Why did he seem so nervous? It's not anything bad right? You silently set the table, slightly anxious about what he needs to talk to you about, and you both eat not saying a word.

The air was tense through out dinner and even cleaning up. Him not saying a word and refusing to make eye contact worried you even more.

'Did I do something wrong?' You thought to yourself while putting the dishes away.

"(Name)." He said interrupting your train of thought. You look back at him and see him fidgeting, looking even more nervous than he did before. You were scared to respond, fearing what words you may hear next.

"Yes Albedo?"

"I...I want to take our relationship further." He said quietly while looking at the floor. His face flushed red.

You looked at him slightly confused at first...then it clicked. "What?" You asked eyes going wide. Well this definitely wasn't what you were expecting.

"I'm ready for us to have sex....if you're okay with it that is." He says a bit louder still looking at the floor. Your face was on fire, matching the red hue on his.

"A-are you sure?" You stuttered out carefully placing the last dish in its place and not taking your eyes off him. He nodded quickly completely sure of his decision. You stared at him for a few seconds and watched as he finally decides to look at you.

"(Name)?" He asks breaking the silence. You walk over to him and cup his face kissing him gently. You both stand there completely lost in the kiss feeling both excited and anxious for what comes next. After a few minutes you take his hand and you both make your way to the bedroom.

'Is this really happening?' Albedo felt like he was in a dream. He didn't believe he was actually going to have his first time and that it was going to be with you, someone he loves dearly. His heart was pounding as you lead him to your shared bedroom.

You stop in front of the bed and face him. "Should we take it slow? It's your first time so-" Before you could finish your sentence Albedo kisses you passionately and you were completely caught off guard. Albedo usually wasn't the one to take control, but fuck was it hot when he did.

He pulls away breaking the kiss still keeping his face close to yours. "Sorry for interrupting, I've just been wanting this for so long. I couldn't stop thinking about it all day. I don't want to go slow, I just want you." He says, practically whining as he talks.

Shit. Did that just come out of his mouth? He's been thinking of this all day? If this wasn't his first time you'd bend him over and take him right now, but you decided to go a bit easy on him. You nod still taking in everything that he said and lay him on the bed.

You press your lips against his, kissing him softly, though that doesn't last long. The kiss quickly turns into a heated make out and you guys taking off each others clothes, stopping at your undergarments.

"Are you sure you're okay with this?" You ask softly as you hook your finger under the band of his boxers. He breathes out a yes while nodding, and you slide down his boxers. Albedo closes his legs, completely embarrassed at the fact that you stared at his bare cunt in awe.

"Don't." You say pushing his legs apart and taking in the beautiful sight. You dip your head between his legs and give his cunt a small lick, testing the waters. His legs twitch from the feeling and you smirk, licking him from his hole to his clit. You can hear soft whines and his breathing get heavier as you continue to teasingly lick his pretty pussy.

"(N-Name)...please.." he says bucking his hips, bringing his dripping cunt closer to your mouth. Who were you to deny him pleasure? You quickly got back to licking his soaked folds, fluid all over your mouth. God he was so fucking wet. You could hear him whining as you suck at his swollen clit. You had to push his hips down because he wouldn't stop squirming as you ate his pussy.

After some time, you pull away and lick your lips resulting in a whine from him. Looking up you see him with tears in his eyes and a disappointed frown. God he looked so adorable, you wanted to ruin him then and there. You bring your face to his and kiss him deeply, having him taste himself on your tongue. Running your hands down to his puffy cunt you dip your middle finger inside him slowly. He moans into your mouth squirming slightly as you finger him. After a few minutes you add your ring finger beside it and hear him whine at the feeling. He pulls away from your kiss letting soft moans leave his swollen lips. You kiss and suck at his neck leaving purple bruises on it as you continue fingering his pussy.

"(Name), I-I-" He moans out trying to warn you that he's about to cum. You pull your fingers out of his sopping cunt and wipe them on the sheets. Reaching over to the dresser you grab a condom, tearing it open and putting it on your dick.

"You ready?" You ask, spreading his lips and lining your cock up to his hole. He nods and pushes his hips back encouraging you to do it. You slowly ease half of your cock into his hole and hear him whine and cry at the stretch causing you to stop and check on him.

"You have to relax okay love? You're doing so good." You say while wiping tears from his eyes and kissing his face. He nods trying to relax himself so you can fully enter.

"Y-you can keep going now." He breathes out after a couple minutes of waiting, finally relaxed. You push the rest of your cock in him and hear his breathing shallow, so you still and wait for him to calm down a bit. He looks into your eyes and nods signaling you to start thrusting.

He felt fucking amazing. He was so fucking wet and tight, he clamped around you perfectly. His high pitched moans and the noises of his cunt filled the air as you carefully thrusted into him. He looks down and sees your cock bulging through his stomach causing him to let out the whiniest moan you've ever heard.

"You're so bi-big" he moans out clenching around you. You follow his eyes and see your cock moving in his belly as you thrust. Fuck was he really that small? The erotic sight causes you to deepen your thrusts inside him and groan as you feel him sucking you in.

"Fuck Albedo, you too small for me?" You ask teasingly as you thrust. He shakes his head quickly and clenches again.

"N-no! It f-feels so good...so- ngh perfect!" He struggles to get out. You laugh slightly at this and kiss him softly. Sitting up again you watch as his pretty pussy sucks you in with each thrust. Fuck you weren't gonna last much longer, and because of your earlier teasing Albedo probably wouldn't either. You reach down to rub his clit matching it with your thrusts and Albedo goes wild.

"Fuck! (Name) I'm cl-close!" He yells out squirming at the intense feeling of pleasure. You keep rubbing the sensitive nub as you thrust, not slowing down for a second. Soon enough, you feel him clench and hear a pornographic moan come out of his mouth as he releases. The sight alone could make anyone cum and thats what you do. You slow your thrusts fucking you both through your orgasms. Slowly, you pull out and take off the condom throwing it in the trash.

"That was...amazing..." Albedo says between pants, looking at you with a dazed look and parted lips. His thighs shining because of how wet he was before. You chuckle and kiss him softly.

"Lets get you cleaned up hm?"

---------------------------------------------------

First story! This took forever so I hope it isn't absolutely unreadable and that at least someone likes it. Please leave constructive criticism (if any) in the comments ! I'm looking to improve my writing since its my first time! Also pls give me tumblr tips. I've never used this before 😭

Also would just like to add that I'm trans and my blog will mainly be trans stories! ^^

Also I'm on mobile so...sorry if it looks weird..

[apprenticestanheight]

THE FIVE DAYS OF SMUTMAS QUEUE: DAY THREE

Somno - Peter Strahm x gn! reader

Allllllll right, we are on to day three of this event and despite the fact that I never really write this many fics in less than a week unless motivation has come around and hyped me to a point where I'm capable of doing it across two days, I am still chuggin on and to be honest, the concept for this fic is largely what's kept me from going down the demotivated slope.

I have had a very not great last two months of the year and so body worship with peter strahm and a touch of angst with hurt/comfort it is, because I needed to write this idea out and figured this event would be a good opportunity lol.

Last note before this fic begins, this fic is meant for audiences of 18+! Minors, do not interact.

Fic type- this is smut and hurt/comfort

Warnings- somnophilia, oral (afab recieving), there is one mention of trauma/anxiety induced insomnia, and the reader is gn for all intents and purposes, but I went with an AFAB reader as that's the anatomy I know best, and this is edited but barely bc I wanted to post oops.

Peter is all too aware of how rough the last few months have been for you.

Granted, you've not said a word of it because you'd sooner see hell than let anyone know when you're going through a rough spot, but since your relationship has begun, Peter has learned to look for the subtle tells you display whenever you feel like your life is about to start falling apart.

Peter is something of a chronic insomniac because of how the on-call schedule of his work with the Jigsaw case has impacted his sleeping capabilities, and so he's used to staying awake for hours on end in case he gets a phone call from someone at the Jersey precinct.

You, however, work a decent and consistent job as a cleaner that pays more than well. You have a set of routines—you wake up at six thirty every morning, make a steaming mug of chai from the K-Cups you adore, eat an easy breakfast and a cliff bar on your way out of the house.

You're at work from seven-thirty in the morning to six thirty most nights, come home and do whatever needs doing around the apartment that you and Peter share, and you watch TV or read until Peter comes home and the two of you order dinner.

You always go to bed sooner than Peter does, typically going to bed somewhere around eleven or midnight where the earliest Peter goes to sleep is one, and then you wake up the next morning and your cycle repeats.

However, since September, whenever Peter has come to bed, you've still been awake, even if it's three or four in the morning. The chai you made with the K-Cups you adore has turned into a steaming cup of coffee that you have to sweeten with brown sugar, honey, and sometimes maple syrup to be able to tolerate.

You're at work from seven am to nine or ten most nights now, and by the time you're home, the housework has been looked after because Peters hired a cleaning lady to come by the house and make sure the house stays clean once every four or five days.

You come home and Peter tries to get you to smile but nothing really does the trick. Peter finds that he misses you, wants to try to goad you into talking it out with him but knows from too many attempts to do so that it absolutely will not work.

But, when he comes home on the 22nd at 7:30, a rarely early time for him get home as the stuff with Jigsaw has progressed, he's completely and utterly shocked to see you sitting on the couch in your living room.

When he closes the door, your gaze snaps to his.

"I owe you an apology," you say. "I've been very terrible at being a spouse the past few months. I shouldn't've subjected you to that. I know I need to be better at communicating and I just feel awful because I've pretty much shut you out and I just—it's just not—it's not fair to you, Peter."

"It's all right, Y/N," he says. "I thought that something had happened, yeah? I figured you wanted space and I was going to give it to you until you decided you wanted closeness again. I know I get angry really quick and am frankly a little surprised I haven't snapped about it but I have worked on not snapping a lot since we started dating."

You've been married something like a decade. It took a lot of storming for Peter to reach the level of evenness, the level of calm, where he stood.

"Yeah, but I've been terrible," you laugh. Peter approaches, sits next to you on your couch. "I've not—it's not been fair, Pete. I haven't talked, I've worked myself almost to the bone, I don't eat breakfast like I used to—all of my routines have been thrown off by this, and I can't imagine how yours have been."

He wishes he could say that he was fine, completely unaffected by it, but to say that would be to lie right to your face, which is something he promised never to do in his wedding vows. He worried about you all the time, desperately wanted to ask you if you were okay and try to goad you into talking to him even though that had never, ever worked in his favor.

Peter grins at you. "I'm just glad you're okay, Y/N," he says. "Had me worried for a stretch, if I'm honest."

"I'm sorry to have worried you," you say. "I've just—work has been driving me mental. I took more hours to get a bit of a Christmas bonus on top of the bonus I get tomorrow to try to ease the mental stuff I've been dealing with and yeah, the cushy paycheck is great but fuck if I don't hate dealing with people during the holiday season. I have been yelled at about how spotless houses need to be more times than I can count."

Peter laughs. "You're the one who decided to go into the cleaning business," he says. You laugh a bit yourself, press your forehead against his shoulder.

"I know," you mumble sadly, a laugh trailing through your words. "But when I started, I'd really hoped I would spend less time talking to people, more time deep cleaning carpets while I had decent music playing through a Walkman. I do get to listen to music but the people are becoming more and more of an issue lately."

Peter presses a kiss to the top of your head. "You're gonna take a bit of time off, mm? You definitely seem like you could use it."

"I booked it last night," you nod. "Tomorrow through til valentines day. I need the time to settle back into routines and I've been drinking coffee religiously—it's more than the one I drink here. I drink at least three cups a day just in the name of keeping myself upright and that needs to stop. I am beyond caffeine overdose. I can drink 600 miligrams a day and not feel a thing."

"That is definitely cause for concern," Peter laughs. "But I'm glad you're okay and that you're trying to get better. I've booked up until the New Year off so that I could catch up on sleep, too, but if we're both home, it means a lot of us time after Christmas. Still goin' up to New York?"

"My mother will put us to death if we don't," you laugh. Peter laughs.

For a solid few minutes, things really do feel like they'll be okay.

-

For what is probably the first time since before he was so much as a cop, Peter Strahm is asleep, you also asleep next to him in the bed that you share, at nine o'clock. He wakes up at six thirty from an unfortunately kinky dream and all he wants to do is part your legs and eat you out until he can't breathe.

Granted—you've spoken extensively about it before, and you've given him the okay to do it several times just as he has you, but still. The part of Peter that's turned on by the idea is equally matched by the part that kind of feels gross about it.

But then, approximately five minutes into unbearably loud thoughts about pulling down the sweatpants you'd stolen from him and parting your legs and devouring you, and five minutes away from just running to the bathroom and rubbing one out to the idea, he watches you press your face against the pillow and moan loud enough for him to hear it.

"Peter," you moan. "Fuck, feels so good."

Peters eyes nearly roll to the back of his head and he bites down on his tongue to keep himself from floating.

He tries to shake out his hands, tries to think of anything else while your quiet, desperate moans fill the air.

He thrums through the Jigsaw victims that've popped up in recent weeks, tries to think about something like the weather or the baseball scores or something to focus on anything but the fact that you're in the midst of a sex dream, one involving him, and the fact that you're moaning your way through it in a way that makes Peter want to lose his mind.

And then, you moan Peters name in a way that you know in your lucid moments drives him crazy, and Peter can't stop himself.

You've discussed it before, and Peters done it before, and every single time he's woken you up with his tongue rubbing wildly against your clit, you've moaned out and started rutting against his face and made a comment about how much you liked waking up to Peter bringing you to orgasm.

Peter is careful to remove the sweatpants you've taken from his drawer, lifting up the shirt you also stole and exposing some of your waist.

He licks a stripe through your folds, not at all surprised to find you're wet if the way that you're moaning from the dream is of any indication, and almost moans against your cunt right then and there.

He starts off slowly, licking stripes against your folds and drinking your wetness down his throat like it's water. Every single time you moan something within him flutters, and he knows it's been too long since he's taken his time with eating you out.

And then, as his tongue attaches to your clit, he feels one of your hands move to his hair.

"Best way to wake up ever," you whisper. "Oh, Peter. Thank you."

You sound half-asleep, but Peter moans against you and you tug on his hair encouragingly, so he keeps going.

He runs his tongue in circles over your clit, sliding a digit into your wet hole without a thought in the world, fighting a smirk when you moan and tug on his hair again.

He starts thrusting, sets a pace that has you writhing within minutes, and takes his fingers out in the last split second before you release, replacing his fingers with his tongue and lapping up your cum without thought, care, or merit. You thrust against his face in the aftershocks, moan as he gets up from his position.

He pulls you in for a kiss while you use one arm to amble through your nightstand for a condom, feeling Marks half-hard, clothed-but-only-by-flannel-pajama-pants length against your bare thigh.

You pull away only so that he can take his pants off, and you slide the condom on with care for how hard his cock is. He peppers your neck and jawline with kisses as he slowly thrusts into your sensitive folds, moaning as he bottoms out.

"I love you," he says to fill the silence while he waits for you to adjust.

"Thank you for dealing with me when I'm at my worst," you press a kiss to his cheekbone. "And for waking me up in the best way ever. Love it when you eat me out, Pete. You're so fucking good at it."

Your legs are wrapped around his waist and you squeeze his hips to tell him to start moving, and when he does, he sets a slow pace. Despite his fervency when it came to oral, he did intend to actually make it known that he did love you and wasn't always in it just to get you or himself to orgasm as quickly as possible.

His pace is slow indeed, but not slow enough that you're pretty much begging him to pick it up a little, and his thrusts are languid in a way that's perfect.

Both of you start moaning after a bit, and Peter, the guy who never moans and usually just likes hearing how you sound when you do, is moaning lewdly and loudly into the nape of your neck while you moan quietly near his ear.

"Peter," you moan. "Peter, fuck. You're so fucking good at this, yeah? You're treating me so well, baby. You're amazing."

Peter moans, clearly enjoying the praise, and you rut your hips against him.

"Fuck," he moans, picking up the pace just a little. "Fuck, Y/N. I love getting you so slick. You were dreaming about me, yeah?"

"Yeah," you nod. "Yeah. We were fucking at the precinct, in one of the storage closets."

Peter moves a hand to rub your clit, loving the moan that it brings out of you.

Minutes pass by of the same, and your release triggers Peters. You moan each others names as you come, and while you go pee to make sure you don't end up with a UTI, Peter pulls the condom off and trashes it, gets a bath going for the two of you.

In the bath, you talk of plans for the day, which will consist entirely of going to the shops together, reading books and doing last-minute christmas shopping.

All in all, you're happy that Peter woke you up with oral and Peter is happy that you're feeling okay enough to want to be woken up that way again.

[dorkfruit]

i put this together using my computer's trackpad so the new year is already starting out . bad .

posts: J | F | M | A | M | J | J | A | S | O | N | D

template

reflections on the year, my plans for the future, some studies i did, and wips for the next year all down below for those who are interested

tldr; we will be ianthing next year so watch out!!

oh dear lord it's been another year. 2024! can you believe it! i don't talk much on this blog because i have a tendency to talk too much, but it's my little new year's treat, so here we go.

RECAP

i started taking drawing "seriously" in December of 2020, starting to do studies and stuff, and each year since i've ramped it up more and more. this year, i did. a lot of studies. there's probably like at least 200 more in my folder now (not including the 300 days worth of gesture drawings i did), with things like painting, faces, feet, poses, etc. anything i was struggling with, i went right into studying it. my art has been mediocre for a pretty long time now, and it's only the past few months where i feel i'm starting to get the hang of it, which is exciting!

more importantly, i started posting a lot more on this blog. i really like documenting my progress, looking on where i was before and seeing how i've improved. everytime i draw some fanart, im like, oooghh i can't wait to show my (: followers (: !! lots of locked tomb art of course. i've been trying to nail the energy of the different characters, which is why i enjoy books so much, because you get a lot of creative control. drawing ianthe is my fav of course, cause she's my lil nasty, but also i enjoyed doing designs for characters i hadnt thought about before, like judith.

in addition to the locked tomb, we had some new fandoms that got brief moments in between iantheposting: Fear and Hunger, Postal, Faith The Unholy Trinity, and a couple of old ones too, like We Have Always Lived In The Castle and The Merciless.

i posted about 115 times this year, although most of those are shitposts LOL i love posting stuff on my blog and showing people my stuff <3

THE FUTURE

my plans? do more ianthe art, of course. ill be working on more studies, probably going to work on developing a style, and figuring out how to paint. i'd like to do more actually finished pieces, but let's be honest, it'll still be mostly shitpost doodles. i'd like to do more weird stuff. i've been messing around with some gore and NSFW near the end of the year, and it's fun to draw for me. i like idk art that evokes some type of emotion, especially discomfort, and so i find that type of art fun to do, so if you don't enjoy what i've done thus far in that direction, perhaps this isn't the blog for you. i really like horror media, and so i want to do some stuff like that too.

for specifics, i like western type art, a comic book-esque style i'd like to aim for. but i'd like it to be a little more. weird with it. i find comic books often draw all the characters the same, and make all the characters traditionally attractive, and that's boring to me so i'll have to work on finding a way to keep things weird, while also appealing in a graphic sense. the worst thing my art could be is bland and forgettable.

locked tomb wise... more tridentarii art. need to be really weird with it. i have lots of wips planned, like i have a whole page worth of just thumbnails, so i wanna get some of those done. also i had a few animatics i wanted to do. mostly stupid shit, once i learn how to do animatics, then we'll do actual serious ones. id also like to do more comics. i have some comics storyboarded out with my girlies, i like telling a story so, need practice on that. id also like to develop a way to consistently draw them, for convenience sakes, so i'm not fighting for my life every single time i draw these characters. oh and i wanna do some outfit stuff. i draw them in like. generic clothes everytime but i'd like to come up with a few actual outfit designs, that i can just reference back to. and, of course, more shitposts. lots of stupid shit in 2024 for sure. there was something else i wanted to say here but i can't remember.

ART

oki enough rambling, here's some IMAGES for yall to look at i know everyone loves to look at images.

began this year by warming up with gesture sketches (almost) every day. i started with 20 poses (30 seconds each), and then in november i was like. ugh my hands suck i need to get better at hands, so i switched to doing 10 hand sketches (60 seconds each). i want my art to be very energetic so it's important that i do these !!

anatomy studies of extremities because i'm flopping at those -_- ive gotten better with hands but they're still a struggle. i hate feet tho still

need to get my painting game up. i joined an art forum to get advice, and the biggest suggestion i got was working on my values, so i did various value studies. also lots of faces because my faces flop !!

random doodles to work on drawing from imagination. on my "sketchbook" pages, as i like to call them, i'm usually pretty loose and messy, since the point is just to be drawing so often these will suck, but that's fine. i don't think very much when i draw faces on here either so they end up being in my Instinctive Style i suppose you could say

ianthe wip. i was planning to do a few drawings based on the idea of her having Missing Arm nightmares, but the lineart was intimidating to me so i haven't worked on this one more yet /: also there was going to be a toontown gay homosexual toxic yuri comic that i was gonna put here with it but the page is way too long so umm guess that'll have to wait.

...

anyways. thank you for reading if you got to the bottom of this! i appreciate all the support that i've been getting lately (extra big kissies for the same like 5 people who always reblog my posts youre the best). and we will be ianthing soo hard in 2024 so watch out!!

[thirstyforcharacters]

Healing

Part 3 of the Mistakes Series

Part 1: Mistakes. Part 2: Reconnection

Summary: The past repeats itself, but Joel refuses to make the same mistake twice.

Warnings: angst!! canon typical violence, brief description of gunshot wound, Joel is finally getting good at emotions :)

WC: 1279

Notes: Hellooooo! I wasn’t sure if I was going to write a part 3, but I was inspired, so I wrote the entire thing this morning! Finally, we get to the fluffy stuff, but of course I still had to sprinkle in some angst! This is definitely the last full installment of the series, but I wouldn’t mind writing some blurbs and whatnot about these two, so if you still want to see this pairing, you can totally send me some requests for that :) or if you just want to send requests in general, feel free to do that as well! thank you all so much for reading this series: I’ve never written this much angst before, so I was afraid it wouldn’t turn out well, but I’m super thankful that you all enjoyed Mistakes!!!

PS: anything in italics is a flashback :)

Things were awkward for a while.

You didn’t feel as though you could fully trust him yet. You were too afraid of him hurting you again. But you adored Ellie, and because Ellie insisted upon you coming over and sharing her stack of comic books, Joel slowly became a more consistent figure in your life again. As spring became summer, you learned to trust him more. You told him about your solo travels, how you had taken out a raiding party single handedly and survived more than one encounter with Infected. He opened up to you as well, telling you the tale of how he and Ellie came to Jackson just a few months ago. You really felt for him: the things they had been through were terrifying, and you could see how much the two had grown to care for each other throughout their journey. And seeing the way Joel loved Ellie gave you hope. That maybe he could love you and not shut you out.

Little did you know that that theory would be tested sooner than you expected.

The two of you were paired up for patrol often (which Tommy said was because “you’re one of the only people he tolerates in this town, and I need a break sometimes.”), and today was no different. You were trudging along the craggy mountain path, stepping over long, broken branches, dodging wildlife, and trying not to make too much noise. During this part of the patrol, you always walked in silence, not wanting to attract unwanted attention. There would be time for talking once you got to the safehouse, a cabin that you were now about halfway to.

The silence was broken by a gunshot. You barely remembered what happened next.

You collapsed to the ground, pressing your hand to your stomach as it became coated with red.

Joel couldn’t speak, couldn’t breathe as he saw you fall. He could only think of the first time.

“Sweetheart, please.”

His pleas fell upon deaf ears. Your eyes had fluttered shut as you lost consciousness, unable to reply.

“JOEL!”

Tess’s shout was the only thing that pulled him from his own head. He had never moved so fast, scooping you up without a second thought and sprinting after Tess, carrying you the entire way to Bill and Frank’s without rest.

“Y/n will be okay, Joel,” Tess assured him, “Frank will take care of things.”

Joel nodded, barely hearing as he ran. He needed you. Holy shit, he needed you. More than he needed anyone else in this god-forsaken hellscape. He loved you too much.

He shook it off, seeing the concealed figures through the bushes. He saw red, going after the raiders with a rage he had only felt a few times. When Sarah was shot. When he killed an entire warehouse of Fireflies for Ellie. And now, for you.

The raiders had no chance. They dropped like flies under Joel’s thunderous fury, with knives sunk into their stomachs, gunshots to their hearts, and fists breaking in their faces until they could speak no more. When they were all dead, the threat of any danger to you taken care of, he ran to your side, seeing your eyes were already closed.

“Shit,” he hissed, quickly tearing off strips of his shirt to tie around you and attempt to staunch the bleeding, “I’ve got you, sweetheart. Not fuckin dying on my watch.”

He picked you up, not unlike the first time, as he ran to Jackson. The year and a half between the first time he did this and now was affecting him: his legs burned and his breaths were ragged. But he didn’t stop. Not for a goddamn minute. He needed you.

It felt far too long before he saw the towering, wooden gates to the town, which swung open almost immediately as the gatekeepers saw the scene before them. Joel sprinted down the streets, carrying your limp body to the infirmary.

The doors burst open as Dr. Casey and two nurses saw Joel, frantically looking around with you in his arms.

“Raiders,” was all he could get out, but they understood.

“Here,” the doctor said as calmly as she could, gesturing toward a table, “we’ll get the bullet out and stitch Y/n up. Don’t worry.”

Joel grit his teeth. Don’t worry? How in the absolute hell was he supposed to do that? But he didn’t say a thing as Dr. Casey got to work. He trusted the doctor fully: she was one of the few people who actually was a doctor before everything went to shit, so she knew what she was doing. But he was terrified. He just got you back, and he could lose you again.

One of the nurses, Allen, who had been there when you were first brought to Jackson, looked at him and said, “Joel. Y/n will be okay. We promise.”

He nodded, swallowing the lump in his throat as the door swung open again.

It was Ellie, who for once, didn’t speak. She just gently took Joel’s hand and led him to their home. And he broke down, holding one of his girls as he cried for the other.

It was a few hours before a knock sounded as his door.

It was Allen, who had a soft smile on his face.

“Y/n’s fine. Lost a decent bit of blood, so she’s still weak. But she’s okay. Do you want to se-”

He couldn’t even finish his sentence as Joel bolted past him in the direction of the clinic.

Ellie giggled, “Sorry, he’s just excited. So I’ll thank you for the both of us.”

Allen nodded, smiling a little wider, “Whole town thought he’d be a grump forever. But having both of you in his life seems like it’s helping.”

She smiled, “It’s not just helping him.”

The door to the infirmary burst open again, but with a much different purpose. You were in the corner. You were bandaged and pretty beat up, but you were alive. You and Dr. Casey looked up at the sound of the wooden doors banging against the wall. You couldn’t help the fond smile that made its way onto your features as a blur of a black flannel and blue jeans burst onto the scene, wrapping you up into his tight embrace.

“I’ll leave you alone,” the doctor whispered before disappearing into a back room.

“‘M okay, Joel,” you murmured, your voice muffled into the fabric of his shirt, “you saved me. I’m okay.”

Hearing your voice confirm the very words he needed to hear allowed him to catch his breath.

“Thought I lost you again,” he said, gripping your shirt with calloused hands.

You shook your head, “Didn’t lose me.”

He pulled away, gently cupping your face in his hands. You could see the wetness beginning to gather in his eyes.

“I-” he swallowed hard, “I can’t lose you.”

“You won’t,” you assured him, “I won’t leave you.”

There was still a bit of fear in you. There was still a chance of him pushing you away as soon as you were healed. You were terrified of that possibility.

But any fear you had immediately washed away as his lips pressed to yours. It was years in the making, and the way you felt when you connected made you wish it had happened years ago. He cupped your face so delicately, and his lips mirrored the softness of his hands, kissing you so tenderly you could cry.

It ended too soon, Joel pulling away to whisper, “I’m not leaving you, either. Ever again.”

And you knew it was safe to believe him.

[crossroadsandloudmusic]

HOT DAMN ITS BEEN A MINUTE! I know I’m sorry y’all life has just been all up in the way for the past couple weeks/months but I’m back now! It’s late where I’m at so I will get started with the Matchmaker post as soon as I can but for now please enjoy this head cannon thing I wrote for y’all, it’s been in my drafts forever now but I figured sure why not, let’s finish it up and post part 1! Terribly sorry about my sudden disappearance but I have found that nothing quite fills the void more than being on here and sharing experiences with all of you! Thank you for you patience I do apologize once again, you have all been tremendous and I love you for it.

Without further ado let’s get in to it!

Recently I went to the fair and the entire time I could only think about how the Hashira would act. Therefore I decided to write and I hope you all enjoy. (Me from the future here, went to the fair and had an amazing time! Enjoy some pictures! More at the bottom)

Btw this is all based on my opinion and has no actual evidence to back it up.

Warnings: Sanemi traumatizes entire fair. But no seriously like heights, someone almost falling off a ride. That’s it tho.

PLEASE ENJOY!

The Hashira at The Fair

Part 1!

Kyojuro Rengoku:

I love Rengoku, everyone knows that. He is my comfort character, my baby daddy, if you will. So maybe I am partial but I think he would be one of the funniest characters at the fair, let me elaborate.

In my belief, he would be in charge of the entire operation. He buys the tickets, he organizes it, he rallies everyone together, but most of all he is there to ensure that everyone has a good time AND a safe time.

“Seat belts everyone!” *in ms. Frizzle’s voice*

Think I’m playing? Absolutely not. Rengoku is on the ball when it comes to height requirements and restrictions, too tall or too short that’s too bad.

Seatbelts? Don’t make me laugh. Before the ride starts Kyojuro is running and making sure all seatbelts are up to code and are fastened. He does not care if you battle some of the most violent and horrid demons there are, you will be safe at the fair.

Will question the structural integrity of the rides themselves.

Kyojuro. They are consistently taken down and put up in a span of a week, there will be stuff missing and there will be issues. It’s best not to ask.

Nevertheless he does end up having a good time. He throughly enjoys the rides that are as follows: The Scrambler-you get into these little booths and it moves around really fast in almost a star shape pattern. Whole lot of fun, one of my favorites. The Alien Abduction- it’s just an alien ship shaped building that spins around really fast. The g force sticks you too the wall. Really fun, kinda dizzy afterwards (much like sleeping with Kyojuro). And then finally The Nitro. It’s essentially a huge swing, but it’s like a swing on steroids. It’s really fast and sends you really high, this one is prolly my favorite.

Kyojuro is pretty tame when it comes to trying all the rides and when it comes to others being too short or too tall for one of the rides, he feels that he should stay beside them and keep them company so they don’t feel left out. He really wants to make sure everyone had a good time.

On terms of food served at the fair, I think he would really enjoy funnel cakes. That isn’t to say he didn’t eat atleast one of everything. (Him and Mitsuri spent a lot of time trying the fair food. They ate 6 funnel cakes. The poor people working at the food trucks were beyond stressed with how much they were eating and buying. The lemonade guy couldn’t keep up😔).

On the subject of games, Kyojuro enjoyed the darts and ring toss. Extremely good at both and as a result came home with a ton of stuffed animals. The biggest one being a stuffed sloth. Very much enjoys his sloth and let’s it sit next to his bed. (Cuddles with it sometimes, but nobody knows). Won a ton of prizes for Shinobu and Mitsuri. Gave a bunch to Gyomie as well for the kids at the orphanage. After a short talk it was decided that they come back the next day to bring the kids.

In conclusion these are the same people and you can’t tell me otherwise. 12/10 had a great time and will be coming back.

Uzui Tengen

Oh man, Uzui Tengen and his wives at the fair. Be still my heart.

Number 1. BEFORE WE GO ANY FURTHER I WOULD LIKE TO MAKE A PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT ABOUT HOW GOTDAMN CUTE THIS SHIT FINNA BE.

Number 2. Let’s not lie to ourselves or anyone else by denying that Tengen and the girls are literally the cutest relationship I’ve ever seen.

So y’all already KNOW that they gonna be having the most fun, well almost. Let me explain.

Ok so we know that Suma can be a little skittish, and Makio kinda makes it worse if I’m not gonna lie simple because when Suma does get nervous Makio can be a little harsh.

Which then results in Tengen feeling more of babysitter rather a husband taking his wives out for a fun evening. I know you maybe wondering where I’m going with this but please, bear with me.

The Ferris Wheel. A staple of the amusement industry, all with its bright lights and soaring heights, it’s no wonder it’s one of the most iconic and recognized piece of fair equipment. That being said, if you have never riding on a Ferris wheel, I do not recommend it for the faint of heart. Not it is not fast, and no it doesn’t sling you around like some of the rides, but if you have a fear of heights or just not prepared, the ride itself can be a bit jarring.

Therefore, when Tengen and his wonderful, beautiful, lovely wives all got on to the ride, it was at that moment Suma had begun to sweat. First the booth went up and then stopped, and then again, and again and again, till they were at the very top of the ride. Of course Tengen wasn’t nearly as impressed because he could jump higher than the peak of the Ferris wheel but still he acted as if he was enjoying himself. Everyone was except for Suma.

Suma clung to Tengen’s arm, this in return caused Makio to fuss. As the two of them got into it, the booth started to sway back and forth. This of course caused Suma to become even more scared.

The rest of the ride was spent trying to calm both of them down.

Btw Kyojuro was sweating the entire time as they were not adhering to the rules of The Ferris Wheel.

Absolutely shameful.

Eventually the Ferris wheel ride ended. Suma in tears, Makio still fussing all the while Hinatsuru and Tengen desperately tried to separate the two.

Rest of the evening went off without a hitch, every one of the girls got a large stuffed animal. (Tengen won these at one of those strength games. Yk the one with the big hammer and a bell at the top). (He broke it).

They all four took really cute pictures together, in fact they got several with all the hashira! 11/10 wonderful evening will definitely be coming back to the fair, next time he will be prepared for if and when Suma gets scared on the Ferris Wheel or other tall rides.

Gyomei Himejima:

Oof alright.

So.

He’s a big man, like a VERY big MAN.

7 feet 2 inches and HALF! THATS A BIG DUDE.

And I’m sure you could already understand that yes, he unfortunately wasn’t allowed on many of the rides. But☝️. He found other ways to enjoy the fair!

Let me tell y’all, this man is a BEAST at fair games. Ring toss? Boom, undefeated. Darts? Bodied. Cornhole? Didn’t even faze him. Dunk the clown? Dude shoulda just stayed in the water bc either way he was gonna get there with Gyomei throwing strikes every time. He was doing so well that carnies were getting mad. Not only that a crowd had eventually formed around him; watching in utter astonishment as the giant man (blind, giant man, was ABSOLUTELY BRUTALIZING THESE GAMES).

More specifically…the dart throwing incident.

Let me set the mood for ya. Kinda give you a bit of a visual explanation as to better explain the where, when, who, for this scene.

The sun had long set, the cool night air filled with laughter and excitement as the fair continued into the evening. Lights, music, the cacophony of peoples voices, and the smell of fried foods are what make up the atmosphere of the game booths and rides. Except for one game at the far end of a long and winding path of fair games. There an unusually large man stood with three darts in his hand. One by one he carefully picked them out and threw them towards the board. Each bullseye had a little red balloon in the center, every line had a number of prizes one could win. But if one were to hit directly in the center they would win a large prize. You had three chances to win a big prize, the target to the left, the target in the middle, and the target to the right. If someone were to hit all three bullseyes they would not only win three big prizes but they also win an extra three chances.

Kyojuro explained the rules to Gyomei and handed him the darts. Not a moment after that three distinct pops could be heard ring out in the surrounding area.

A hush fell over the people who were waiting patiently behind him, even the woman who ran the booth seemed amazed at Gyomie’s win. She allowed him to pick out three large stuffed animals and handed him the darts back.

Once more balloons were blown up and set into position, Gyomei played again.

POP!

POP!

POP!

The woman turned to see that once again all the balloons had been popped, all three darts sat perfect in the center of each target. She was flabbergasted! She couldn’t even speak, it was rare as it was seeing someone who could hit all three targets but dead center 6 times in a row?!?! She shook her head looking at Gyomei and then back at the board, once more at Gyomei and then again back at the board.

Once she regained her composure she removed the darts, filled the balloons again, and handed the darts to him.

“Well done! Let’s see if you can do it a third!” She said, she eyed him closely as she was sure something was amiss.

Now the line of people behind him turned into a small group surrounding him, they all whispered and talked amongst themselves as they watched him carefully.

Silently Gyomie picked out his darts and threw them one by one.

POP!

POP!

POP!

The crowd erupted in cheers! He had done it again! The woman now clearly sweating as Gyomie had only spent 1 dollar and had won 9 prizes! Suddenly the people that stood next to him began throwing dollars and quarters at the woman, screaming that she give him the darts and let him play again.

As more commotion began to erupt, more people were gathered to the booth to watch him play. Some of the other fair goers even went as far as placing bets on Gyomie, wagering when the woman running the booth would eventually kick him out as she was running out of balloons and prizes.

Gyomie played a perfect game 6 times before Kyojuro thought it best to go play another game. He won 18 prizes from that game alone😐. They went to the ping pong in a bowl game, he won 12 goldfish.

At the end of the night Gyomie had more prizes THAN ANYONE IN THE HISTORY OF FAIR GAME PLAYERS EVER WON. So many in fact he stood next to the Caterpillar roller coaster for the kids and gave out a toy for every kid that came by.

That night Gyomie became more than a Hashira. He became a martyr, a light for those who had been burned by sleazy fair games, never again would they lose hope as it was he who came and won them all.

13/10 he had an amazing time, but cried when the lady said he was too good and needed to play another game. He felt bad and later came back to apologize and she gave him a hug. He cried once again.

Sanemi Shinazugawa

He is immediately kicked out.

Jk jk but like fr tho👀 he acted a fool.

Not even gonna lie to y’all, yall see this man, no but do y’all really see this man. He is 5 foot 10 inches of pure malice. (He’s soft baby on this inside but this is not important to the story). Straight menace behavior, DO NOT TELL ME IM WRONG.

He cut every line, and when people tried to protest to this he only turned around and glared at them with his cold eyes🥶 most people would stare back and tremble in terror, one man even began to weep as he looked into Sanemi’s eyes. The man later mumbled that he had peered into hell and hell peered back. (The man was traumatized for lack of a better term, needed therapy, he’s doing better now tho).

Sanemi rode every ride and played every game, he even got into a fight with one of the clowns! (In Sanemi’s defense the clown had it coming). But besides all that Sanemi found most enjoyment out of terrifying the other participants on the rides. In one instance, he turned to the woman sitting next to him and offhandedly mentioned that the seat she was sitting in didn’t latch all the way. As it was theses seats for this specific ride had a bit of give to them when you pushed the pull down part of the harness. She instinctively pushed the bar and it moved a bit before clicking, she turned to look at him and before she had the chance to alert the ride operator, the ride began to swing.

Once the ride had finished the woman was convinced her life had nearly ended due to a faulty ride harness. She immediately got off the ride and ran into the crowd, but her fear wasn’t entirely that of the ride’s seats, it was partially because as she started to scream and beg for dear life, Sanemi erupted in laughter. The scariest part was being seated next to him for the entirety of the ride.

This some how only fueled his behavior. Next he wanted to take it to the next level. He wanted to scare everyone, the people on the ride, the operators, even those who weren’t riding. Each ride he got on he made an effort to terrify everyone. Whether it be him yelling that ride was falling apart or dropping pieces of nuts and bolts close to the operators. This only aroused his hunger. He needed to take it one step further.

There is a ride called The Umbrella, The Octopus, The plane ride, whatever you want to call it, it’s the same ride. It’s giant tower that has a bunch of swings hanging from it, first it starts of slow and low to the ground, it is then risen off the ground and high above the pavement in which it begins to swing faster. This is a VERY tame ride compared to others as it isn’t extremely fast and it’s also not extremely high when compared to the Ring of Fire (one of Sanemi’s favorites although it did make him slightly sick) and the Ferris Wheel (got bored and started throwing nuts and bolts off the side, surprisingly didn’t hit anyone but as people noticed what they assumed were parts that had fallen off the ride, left the line in search of something “safer”). Sanemi cut to the front of the line and went to find the perfect swing, one was wrapped in caution tape and the seat belt was no longer there. Quickly and quietly he removed the tape and sat down, wrapping what little remained around his waist as it then would appear he did have a seatbelt on. The operator came by and only glanced at Sanemi before going to start the ride. He sat back and chuckled knowing he was going to enjoy this more out of any other he had been on that day. Slowly the ride started and before long he was hoisted several meters from the ground, swing softly through the cool air. He took in a deep breath to savor the moment, it was relaxing being so far up from the chaos, listening to the music and watching the bright colorful lights. Without a moments notice he slipped from the seat and began to scream.

The people below looked up to one of the most horrifying sights there was to see, up in the air a man hung from his swing, his hands gripping to one of the chains that held the swing. He writhed and kicked his feet as he yelled for someone to help. Most if not all began to scream and point. Others got the attention of the operator who hurriedly tried to lower the ride. Every passenger aboard that night gripped their seats and cried. Soon the whole fair watched with bated breath, parents shielded their children, others ran to get help, most stared in shock. The whole while Sanemi cackled in between screams.

The authorities were notified and by the time they arrived with paramedics on scene, the ride had ended and Sanemi was nowhere to be found. This was because he fled and hid himself within the crowd, he caught up with Kyojuro and Gyomie. He played several games with them, all the while Kyojuro was blissfully unaware of the Sanemi’s failure to abide by the rules of the fair rides the main one being, KEEP HANDS AND FEET INSIDE THE RIDE AT ALL TIMES. (Truth be known, Sanemi did in fact have his hands in the ride with the only exclusion being his entire body).

(Sanemi also wanted to play the strong man big hammer game but Tengen had broken it earlier so it was still under repair. He was a tad disappointed and this is what I choose to believe started this entire fiasco).

10/10 had a glorious time at the fair and might come back again someday, he narrowly avoided being escorted off the premises on several occasions so the fact that he didn’t is considered a win in my book. He also single handedly traumatized, horrified, terrified, and scarred an entire group of people spreading to several rides and the riders, operators, as well as the people below the rides themselves. All of this, without being caught by Kyojuro. Truly inspiring.

[ameagrice]

Capsize

chapter seventeen | the red thread of fate

percy jackson x fem reader

The two people connected by the red thread are destined lovers, regardless of place, time, or circumstances. This magical cord may stretch or tangle, but never break.

In the height of summer, you found yourself in Australia. Sydney was a pretty place, and your dad’s new holiday home settled overlooking the beach was your paradise. Surfing became the new daily sport. Evenings consisted of calling your friends and completing online courses your dad signed you up for, since you’d missed way too much schooling.

Your appearance home had been jarring. Not only had you been labelled as missing to the police, but your dad revealed he knew, above all else, what you really were, and who you really were. He’d known since the day you were born, settled on his doorstep in a cream-color blanket.

After all, how could you have literally popped in to existence, appearing with no trace of somebody leaving you?

He promised you could be wherever was safest for you to be. When September started, you’d go back to camp. For the summer, though—

“Dude, you should see my skin,” you lifted your arm and inspected it, holding the phone to your ear with the other hand. You nodded slowly. “I’m glowing.”

“Just don’t get sick if you’re out all the time,” Percy’s voice came through the other side of the phone, all the way in Manhattan. Apparently it was storming there. “I don’t want to visit you in the hospital.”

You scoffed. “Why not? It would be the only time I’d be quiet.”

“Which is why I’d be traumatised.”

“You’re weird.”

“Says you.”

“Whatever,” you leaned down on the window ledge, resting your chin on your hand. The crystal-clear waters glimmered with every crash of the waves. “This is pure heaven. You should come down for the summer next year.”

“That’d be good. Maybe we could bring Annabeth, too.”

Annabeth. Your sister. Your man-stealing, attention-taking sister.

“Yeah!” You faked a happy tone, as if you thought his suggestion was a good idea. “That would be fun.” Fun to shove her in the sea.

“Have you made your mind up about September yet?”

You noticed, though you hadn’t seen him for three months, that his voice had deepened. You only imagined how much he’d changed in person.

“Yeah, yeah I have. I’m going back to camp. Dad said as long as he sends me school work from Cranwatts, it’ll be fine. It’s funny how things work when your parents know certain people.”

“Can you do that for me? My mom’s sending me to another school.”

You laughed and he sighed. “Good luck with that.”

By seven o’clock, you would usually be finished on the phone to Percy. By eight, your phone would ring again.

You’d pick up the receiver with a coy smile, and hold the phone to your ear with a careful, “Hey.”

“Good morning, lady,” Travis’s voice would float through the phone in a terrible Australian accent.

“If this is the guy from the surf shop, you can get lost,” you replied, twirling the phone cable.

You could practically see his face drop. “Surf guy?! Hey, tell me about this surf guy!”

“Sorry, since you’re not him it’s pretty confidential stuff. Try again in a few years.”

“Uh—no! This is important shit! You gotta tell me about this kind of stuff.”

You giggled. “Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t know you’re secretly a girl, Travis.”

“We can talk girl stuff!” His voice was high.

You nodded, rolling your eyes. “Yeah, sure. Wanna talk about pad sizes?”

He retched and you burst out laughing. “I’m Travis again.”

You faked a sigh. “Oh, thank god.”

“Which one.”

“My mother?” You shrugged.

“Reasonable. So, you coming back to camp this year?”

September came around quicker than you could have imagined. On August 31st, you took a plane back to the States, and then a full night on a train to get back to camp. A taxi to Halfblood Hill was paid for and organised before you arrived, and you ignored the weird look the cabbie sent your way as you climbed out in the middle of nowhere, a white duffel bag on your shoulder and two cases in each hand at your side.

“Thanks!” You waved, shutting the door. He took off quicker than you’d ever seen anyone drive. Maybe he thought you were some kind of junkie.

The woods were all dried up, the mud under your sneakers dried and cracked. Sunlight streaked gently through the trees and blinded you with every movement until you passed over the threshold to camp. A certain tree looked a little droopy, the one right by the border. Probably the summer heat.

It came to life all of a sudden.

The grass under your feet was a familiar and blinding green, healthy and soft. The smell of strawberries filled your nose, and the sound of kids yelling or laughing further away could be heard clear as anything.

A couple of campers waved or called out to you as you walked to your cabin. Once inside, you found the usual scene of tidiness and people either writing or reading or talking. Your bed was unmade, left exactly as you’d left it, and you dumped your bags in the middle of the room to get on your knees and begin pulling out your pillows and covers from the cupboard at the end.

So far, only yourself and two others you’d never so much as talked to before inhabited the cabin. It gave you enough time before others arrived to get your bed sorted and your bags unpacked.

Before Travis came knocking, that is.

“Ladies,” he drawled in a joking manner.

“Get out, Travis. I’m not interested,” one of the girls sitting against the back wall sighed.

“Don’t worry, Mavis. I’m not here for you.”

Oooh, you thought. That was embarrassing.

“Hey, Scout.”

Percy had Bambi. Travis called you Scout. And both were just as endearing to you.

You turned where you knelt, a coy smirk coming to your face. Travis walked slowly across the cabin, hands stuffed in the pockets of his jeans. His hair had grown out, hanging curly over his forehead and short on the sides, blended.

“Like the haircut,” you teased, standing to do a handshake with him. Travis’s hand was warm and bigger than yours, boyishly thin while yours was softer-looking.

“Glad you’ve grown yours out.” He nodded.

Your perm. It was still curly, but it had dropped a considerable amount now, and grown out to a little past your shoulders.

You nodded. “Why thank you. When’s dinner?”

That summer was a strange one. At the announcement of another quest—one you were, once more, not mentioned in—it was time for Percy to take off once more to fix things. Thalia’s tree that guarded the border to camp, was dying. Annabeth was constantly upset, kicking things around the cabin or sitting quietly and thinking to herself. Percy looked stressed. Luke had been weird.

The camp’s defence was down. And after Percy and the others left camp with a promise to try to get in contact with you as often as possible, everyone was on a rota for defending camp. Mondays was Athena and Apollo. Tuesdays was Ares and Hermes. Wednesdays was Demeter and Aphrodite. And then it repeated from the start for the remaining days.

It began to grow harder to sleep. Everyone had to be in their cabins by dark, messing up the schedules. Doors were firmly locked to keep monsters out—though you wondered why they couldn’t just smash a window.

Sometimes, creatures could be heard around or in camp, howling, whistling, or crawling. You’d throw the covers over your head and curl and just I think the fuck not.

You’d wake sweaty, still tired from a restless sleep, and hungry.

Percy returned. Percy was poisoned. Like disappeared. And Thalia was alive.

The girl looked incredibly out of place. She was mean, straightforward, and besties with Annabeth. Thalia had a lot to get used to, looking like a child still. She’d missed out on years upon years of life, almost seven.

Even Chiron looked moved every time he saw her.

Percy complained.

Annabeth was never in her cabin.

Travis thought he broke his elbow.

Travis did, indeed, break his elbow.

And the world carried on.

Camp was protected by the Golden Fleece, glowing 24/7, keeping the borders up.

You’d thought your adventures were over for now. You could focus on school work and fighting techniques.

Wrong.

Horribly wrong.

The car jostled with the fierce wind throwing it. You held on to the handle on the ceiling like your life depended on it, sitting on Annabeth’s knees.

“Why are you so bony?!” She ground out.

“Ew!” You’d call, yelling every time the car swerved in the snow storm.

“Shut up!” She’d call.

Your sister and yourself had a strained relationship.

Thalia was in the front seat. Percy on the right. Sally Jackson’s car only had four seats. Finally, you all opted for being completely squished over Annabeth apparently being in ‘pain’. You’d air-quoted the word as you mumbled. She hit you with her hat.

“Percy was such a cute baby,” Sally Jackson fawned at the wheel. Thalia grinned wickedly, turning to give Percy a look. He pulled a face and looked back out the window. You laughed mockingly and he told you to shut up. “Seriously! And such a foodie, too, I mean seriously he never stopped.”

“Were you a chunky baby, Percy Jackson?” You teased. “Little chunks?” Even Annabeth laughed along now.

“Mom would you shut up!”

Westover Hall came to into sight after an eight hour drive. You’d gone to Percy’s from camp for winter break, and decided to come along on this one. After all, there were three of you now. Chiron couldn’t tell you off for this. And besides, you’d turned fourteen over the summer. You were more mature now.

“Oh, yeah,” Thalia said, wiping the window with her sleeve. “This’ll be fun.”

Thalia took some getting used to. In many ways, you shared the same sarcastic, brutal personality. In other ways, she completely obliterated you with harsh words. She didn’t like you. Thalia was a rocker, all black and metal and goth. You were beaches and sunshine, sarcastic with flawless lipgloss. She called you a Barbie doll the first time you met her. So you called a dead b—

“Are you sure you don’t want me to wait?” Percy’s mom asked.

“No, thanks, mom. I don’t know how long it’ll take,” Percy declined.

“But how will you get back? I’m worried, Percy. I always worry about you.”

“It’s okay, Mrs Jackson,” Annabeth bumped in. You rolled your eyes; suck up. “We’ll keep him out of trouble.”

Thank god you’d dressed for the occasion. You’d managed to wrangle your curly hair into a bun at your neck, and shoved a multicoloured bobble hat on top, covering your eyebrows. With a pair of leggings, high Converse, a tee, sweater and a walking coat you were sure to be warm enough.

You discovered on the walk up to the school that Thalia did not like to take about her family.

In your inside pocket was a dagger. You’d sheathed it, but there always was a worry that you’d somehow get stabbed. You’d picked it out over the summer. A sword was too much of a risk to take with you somewhere casually. But a dagger you could carry around, prepared for anything a monster threw at you.

You’d thought it was just the three of you.

Then you heard a bleet.

It was like deja vu.

Inside, you closed your eyes, sighing. “Guys! Hey, you’re here!”

You plastered a smile to your face. “We made it!”

Grover had grown a little taller and had sprouted a few more whiskers, but otherwise he looked like he always did when he passed for human—a red cap on his curly brown hair to hide his goat horns, baggy jeans and sneakers with fake feet to hide his furry legs and hooves. He was wearing a black T-shirt that took me a few seconds to read. It said WESTOVER HALL: GRUNT. You pulled a face when you saw it.

Nonetheless, Grover was nice to you. “How was your birthday?” He’d asked.

“Not bad!” You nodded along. Not bad at all. It was spent surfing, sunbathing, and being surprise visited by your family.

“So, what’s the emergency?”

Grover took a deep breath, his vibe changing. You picked up on the drop quickly. “I found two.”

“Two half-bloods?” Thalia asked, amazed. “Here?”

Grover nodded.

Travis had told you about Grover’s job. He would search for demigods all over the states, going out of the country if need be. Finding them these days was the hard part, however—they were just getting harder and harder to spot. Whether it be be because they lived in remote areas, or such big areas that scents mixed together and made them hard to discern.

“A brother and a sister,” he said. “They're ten and twelve. I don't know their parentage, but they're strong. We're running out of time, though. I need help.”

“Monsters?”

“One.” Grover looked nervous. “He suspects. I don't think he's positive yet, but this is the last day of term. I'm sure he won't let them leave campus without finding out. It may be our last chance! Every time I try to get close to them, he's always there, blocking me. I don't know what to do!”

“Right. These half-bloods are at the dance?” Thalia confirmed. Grover double confirmed so.

“Then let’s dance,” she suggested. You grinned. Perfect chance to wind up Percy. “Who’s the monster?”

“The vice principal—Dr. Thorn.”

—

There were black and red balloons all over the gym floor, and guys were kicking them in each others faces, or trying to strangle each other with the crepe-paper streamers taped to the walls. Girls moved around in huddles, the way they always do, a way you were familiar with, wearing lots of makeup and spaghetti-strap tops and brightly colored pants and shoes. One girl wore a pair of heels easily over six-inches, you applauded her. The typical scene of teens arguing with teens, kids high on sugar, and girls bitching filled the scene.

A scene you were very much comfortable in.

Percy, on the other hand?

“Oh, cheer up, Perky,” you cooed, pinching his cheek. He jerked away and playfully smacked your hand. “What’s so bad about this?”

“Everything!”

Music boomed and the multi-color lights streamed around the room from fixtures on the ceiling. This was your scene. You’d nabbed a plate of sugar straws in neon coloured plastic casing, and a clear plastic cup of cola. Percy’s hands were in his pants pockets as he looked around awkwardly, as if he wished to be anywhere else at all.

“There they are.”Grover nodded toward a couple of younger kids arguing in the bleachers. “Bianca and Nico di Angelo.”

Bianca, the girl you guessed was twelve, wore a floppy green hat low, like she was trying to hide. In a skirt and jacket, she stood out among the other kids. Her brother, the shorter, younger-looking boy at her side, wore pants and a sweater. He talked animatedly, waving his hands about, and shuffled cards between his fingers. Bianca looked to be reprimanding him.

Annabeth said, “Have you told them?”

Grover shook his head. “You know how it is. That could put them in more danger. Once they realise who they are, their sent becomes stronger.”

He and Percy shared a look.

“So let’s grab them and get them out of here,” Percy said. He started forward, but you firmly put your hand on his shoulder to stop him. Over by the door, the vice principle had slipped in. Dr. Thorn headed over to the Di Angelo’s. One of his eyes seemed to glow.

You’d met him when you entered the school. A tall, thin man with a terrifying vibe. A wrong vibe. And he watched you five carefully. You figured coming along this time may have potentially ruined things. Your presence, the additional two of you to a three-man job, was throwing things off.

“Don’t look at the kids,” Thalia ordered. “We have to wait for a chance to get them. We need to pretend we’re not interested in them. Throw him off.”

“And for some reason I don’t think that’s gonna work…” you mumbled, eyeing the kids.

Thalia’s attention twisted on you. She practically glowered. You weren’t her favorite person in the world by any chance. “And why’s that?”

You leaned on your hip casually, folding your arms. You waved a hand as you spoke. “Because he already knows we’re here. He knows what we’re trying to do. Best chance we have at getting them would be to—”

“Look, I know what I’m doing. We’ve got a good chance of things going our way first time round if we just stick to the plan.”

Maybe. Maybe not. You couldn’t help the resentment that crawled up your spine. Why wouldn’t she just listen to you? You didn’t like her either, but for the sake of the kids, you were willing to work together. It seemed she wasn’t.

Thalia looked away. Annabeth shifted on her feet. Percy sighed at your side.

“We can’t keep standing around like this,” Annabeth voiced. “We’ve gotta do something. Go talk to people, act casual,” she waved a hand in your direction. You sipped your cola.

“Come on, Perky,” you put down your plate. “Let’s get you a drink.”

Grover, Thalia and Annabeth went straight into the crowd while yourself and Percy skirted around it. The cafeteria doors at the back showed tables of food and drinks, where a few students talked and helped themselves. Percy settled for a cup of lemonade. Back out in the main room, you tried not to slosh your drink everywhere as you pulled Percy to the middle of the crowd.

Now he was wildly, visibly uncomfortable.

When a certain song began to play, your eyes widened.

Percy looked like he wanted to die.

“You’re not missing this one!” You called, pulling him out to the edge again to dump your drinks. I’m gonna live out my highschool dream!

Percy groaned. “Look, I’m not a dancer. I’ve never done it—”

“It’ll be cool! I’ll lead!”

“But that’ll make me look—”

Your heart pounded, but he didn’t need to know that. And your stomach filled with butterflies battling, but he didn’t need to know that, either.

Your mind went into overload as he clutched your hand in one and placed his hand very lightly on your hip. You’d have been jealous if he’d solely been watching Annabeth over to the side, but he frowned, and moved his hand a little. He was trying to do it right.

Your cheeks burned badly. Thank god it was dark.

It was like something out of a movie, or a lovey-dovey book. Dancing with your crush at a school dance. Percy stepped on your foot twice or thrice, but you managed to laugh it off. If not for the sake of making it easier for you, but to save him the embarrassment too.

“How was Australia?” He asked, looking at you directly.

He’d grown a considerable amount over the summer, but then, so had you. You wanted to whack him for making it at least an inch taller.

“Good,” you nodded. “I really think you’d like it there.”

“Are you gonna stay there, like, permanently?”

“Probably. It’s pretty. And hot. Both of them together is…yeah.”

Though you smiled, Percy looked like he was struggling to hold his up. It faltered a little.

His eyes shifted. His expression dropped.

“They’re gone.” He hissed. “The kids. They’re gone.”

“Maybe they’ve gone to the restroom,” you muttered absently. He wore his camp necklace outside of camp.

“No,” he dropped his hands. You sighed through your nose. “Thorn’s gone, too. Look, stay here; I’ll get Annabeth and Thalia.”

Annabeth and Thalia. You smiled tightly, nodding. Percy ran in to the crowd.

Leaving you on your own.

Who needed Annabeth and Thalia when you were here? You could’ve worked together, but…

Nah. You were just as capable of them. If Percy couldn’t see that, you’d prove it to him.

Pushing through other students, you made your way to the sideline, in line with the double doors. One swung gently, the way it would when someone pushed through it.

They’d gone that way.

Waiting for Percy would mean waiting for a plan to be put in place. The kids could be in danger and long gone by then.

And since you were just standing…

You took off after them.

First chapter of part two! Nothing terribly exciting. That stuff comes next. Fun fact: Cranwatts is an actual school heheh.

Any predictions?

Taglist:

@bl6o6dy @embersparklz @lilyevanswhore @rottenstyx @hawkeye12 @rory-cakes @i-am-scared-and-useless-bisexual @marshmallow12435 @luckydragontriumph @lantsovheiress @distinguishedmakerpandapatrol @bugsys-bubble @twsssmlmaa @gayandfairycore

[salad-006]

I know you already gave us your thoughts about Eddsworld Legacy, but what do you think about Eddsworld Beyond for now?

To be completely honest, I'm really on the fence with beyond. They're in like this weird fluctuating state, and to me that comes off like them not knowing what they're doing

Sometimes we'll get something hilarious, but more often than not beyond feels awkard and rushed. Stilted is the best word i think. (I'm also just really not a fan of jons animation for the show, which doesn't help at all. His EW style has always felt extremely flat to me ,sorry jon)

More options down below vv

Stuff usually feel unfinished or rushed somehow , ex surf n turf. Part one was probably the most uncomfortable episodes we've gotten so far. you could've easily rearranged things so that the intro of them arriving at the beach was at the beginning of part two, and have it be a single episode. It feels like filler before the actual plot starts next episode

It kinda feels like they're trying to imitate every aspect of Edds work, and it's giving me like. Skinwalker vibes. I get it, Edd made little short animtions with random new characters occasionally. But when a full team makes one with a new character, ties an ad read to it, then never touches that character again, it feels confusing and out of place. IDK i just feel like you loose that ability to just make whatever you want when you put together a team, even if its a small indie group. Maybe im wrong there but the point is i thouht the birds and the bees was dumb

I'll keep my option on the team brief. I don't hate anyone on the team nor do i think any of them are Bad People, but there's definitely been a lot of questionable behavior that has come from these guys. Example, I've always been offput by their relationship with Tord’s characters. In the website they put this:

Yet consistently tease the fans with his existence (ex the caveman episode, tori being canonized, his picture clearly torn out in SnT1, having an entire month of tord merch) Either address the situation or don't, guys. You can't sarcastically be like "oh get over it" when YOU'RE the ones that keep bringing him back. You didn't even answer the question dude, no wonder so many kids beg for his return

I guess I can't be THAT pissed when the money all went to charity, but it still just feels inherently weird and disrespectful to merchandise this character after his creator removed him nearly 15 years ago. Atleast Tomska allegedly asked permission and had good intentions. This feels like they (beyond) just don't give a fuck. If any team members are reading this I'm BEGGING YOU: STOP LETTING THEM BRING BACK TORD . THEY CANT KEEP GETTING AWAY WITH IT . Tord Larsson deserves to be left alone, and to stop getting connected to this show in his past.

Despite everything, I still want to support the team. I'll be honest, SnT2 gave me hope for the series I haven't had in quite a while. It wasn't the greatest, but it was a step upwards. And I'd love to see them keep going up ! Genuinely, I would love nothing more than to see these guys succeed in recreating what made the show good initially. Eddsworld changed my life, so really its incredible to see it still kicking around today. Even if it's in this weird, amorphous glob state. They just need to figure out what the hell they're doing

TLDR: the current state of the show is kinda rough, the team feels discombobulated and has made some weird decisions, however I still have hope that they can make this into something amazing someday

[shootingstarrfish]

HOW DO YOU DRAW SO QUICKLY AGH

I swear every time I turn around you’ve posted another masterpiece I’m jealous you can draw so fast it takes me like 3 days at least for a piece lol

AHH i keep being asked this and im flattered yall think this?? ill take a bit to explain the choices that help with my speed and circumstantial stuff that helps a lot

obligatory YOU DON'T NEED TO DO THINGS FAST taking your time is good!! i just get bored easily so i like being done with things and moving on, but i'm very aware of the fact that social media rewards this and punishes inconsistency so i get it lol

long ass ramble under the cut lol

okay so things i deliberately do to draw fast-

i specifically have 2 distinct styles because i constantly have too many ideas, and most of them don't need to be several hour long illustrations so i try to pick my battles and go for a simpler more expressive style for shitposts/memes/etc and reserve my more detailed style for ideas that actually benefit from having that extra time and effort. ofc this won't work for everyone but i tend to have 50 styles at any given moment anyway so giving myself the freedom to switch between them has been really nice

not necessarily deliberate??? but theres no perfectionism in this house, which helps a lot so i don't spend ages fussing over minute details (im a perfectionist at heart but a lazy one LOL)

giving myself time deadlines is also really helpful, like "i have to finish the lineart im the next half an hour" has been really good for getting me to focus and get things done, even if i don't make the 'deadline'. i think generally being conscious of how i use my time is good

okay so circumstantial (?) things-

ALSO USE REFERENCES they help a lot!!! stumbling around trying to figure things out on your own is time consuming, don't be scared of using references!

this isn't a speed thing but i think it's important to note that i spend like ALL my free time drawing, probably to a ridiculous degree. i draw during my work break, i draw after work, on the weekend, speed is nothing in the face of time lol. im usually tired after work but im also stubborn so i try to push through and draw anyway (50/50 chance it works and i get something done or i just sit there in a daze wishing i was asleep LOL)

im also a dumbass who takes on way too much, i have a whole buncha zines and commissions constantly at all times cause i can never say no so i kinda just HAVE to be fast to keep up with everything. i don't recommend it but it's a thing ashdjfj

i also used to be on tiktok and for some god forsaken reason i spent like a solid few months consistently posting 3 times per day which burnt me out SO fast and i absolutely don't recommend but it definitely required speed lol

i will also say that as i draw more and feel more comfortable in my art it comes to me a lot more naturally, and i'm able to make decisions on the fly a lot easier

also okay so starr lore my dad used to be really against me drawing so i would have to sneak onto the computer when he was out of the house hahaha, this gave me anywhere from 30 mins to 2 hours per day to do whatever i wanted, so i had to quickly adapt to that and be super fast if i ever wanted to get anything done

again speed isnt the be all end all of anything, tbh most of this is just my brain working in weird ways that prefers the quicker pace so please don't compare yourself!!

okay long ass ramble over thanks for reading <3333