#but I still never understood the concept of “you didn’t seem like you needed help” coz like?? I was obviously struggling?? even when I didnt

[ko-eko-ev-go-ms]

Smth I think about sometimes is how like, I do so much stuff to overcompensate my struggles with various things, but generally I don’t acknowledge that I’m doing outside things to overcompensate or if I do I don’t get into specifics.

And then because of that like even if I tell people I’m struggling with x thing they just won’t believe me sometimes coz they didn’t see/listen to me doing work on my own time.

Even if I’m already underperforming they won’t understand how much effort it was taking JUST TO UNDERPERFORM.

But then if I make any progress or aren’t the literal worst it’s all swept under the rug as if it’s easy for me and I just wasn’t working hard enough the whole time or something?

[muniimyg]

6: the madness // series m.list

note: say u missed me or else i’ll cry 🫵

taglist request: send a request with the title of this fic “aao” // DO NOT comment here or on the masterlist . it gets confusing and i prefer answering and tagging through asks !!!

🏷️ permanent taglist: @joonsjuice @pamzn @defzcl @maryy1300 @whoa-jo @taetaecatboy @jksusawife @un06 @firesighgirl @rrosiitas @butterymin @parkinglot-nights @musicjournalsjdb @kissyfacekoo @jkslvsnella @vampcharxter @bloopkook @somehowukook @bbystarcandykoo

//

Timing.

You’ve never really understood it. Not to mention the whole invisible string theory and how implausible it seems… How is it that you can coexist with the love of your life for years and not be with them until the time is right?

Isn’t that strange?

Love is all-consuming, inevitable, and perfect, but its greatest weakness is a mere concept: time.

Speaking of time, you’re early.

As you enter the restaurant and greet your friends, you can’t help but check your phone every other minute. Waiting for a text from him, checking the time, and wondering when he’ll arrive… It feels exhausting to be in this state of longing.

How is it that you’ve been friends with him for so long and now you need him more than ever?

To hold you and tell you everything is alright.

To smile at you like you’re his favorite person in the entire world.

To just be with him.

Even if today wasn’t life or death, you felt so helpless. It felt like everything was against you.

Yes, it was just about a stupid presentation (that barely scratches the surface of your future), but it was still a tough thing to get through alone. It was unexpected and filled with minor mistakes, making it feel like a complete defeat.

So much happened.

First, you slept through your alarm.

Though you made it right on time, you didn’t have the extra moments to prepare and run through your presentation like you had originally planned.

Then, since there was no time for prep, you encountered technical difficulties. Your notes were missing for some reason…

And your stuttering!

God, you never stuttered so much in your life.

It was truly an off morning.

… And it doesn’t end there.

Nope!

As you texted Jungkook and updated him, you remembered that you had a rescheduled quiz to take… You know, the one that you completely forgot to review last night because your head was all over this stupid presentation.

The quiz went fine but it could’ve been better.

You know you could’ve done better.

That’s probably what annoys you the most. Everything that occurred today wasn’t up to your standard performance level. Humanizing it is difficult because the truth is simple…

Some days just aren’t good.

Some days you just have to take the L.

Some days you just need to breathe through.

And that’s okay.

Because after all the bad, losing, and catching-your-breath moments—there’s him.

The very thought of him eases you. Talking to him makes you feel like you’re bigger than the bad and the losing. Being with him is as easy as breathing.

“Hey ___,” an unfamiliar voice disrupts your thoughts. You turn your head to see who it is. Beside you, a tall man with a broad build offers you a smile. He has short hair and dimples. Even with just his appearance, he’s charming (you can’t deny that).

Politely, you return it but it’s obvious you’re confused.

“… I’m so sorry,” you feel slightly embarrassed to not remember his name. “You are?”

“Mingyu,” he introduces himself, stepping closer and offering his hand. You take it, shaking it slowly and unsure.

He tries again.

“I’m Jungkook’s friend,” Mingyu explains. “You’re Jungkook’s… Uh?”

“O-oh!” you avoid the question and redirect the conversation. “Are you in his friend group with Jaehyun and them?”

He scoffs. “By ‘them’ you mean those guys?”

Mingyu points to a group of tall guys hovering over the menu display. You count them and can’t help but laugh.

Then, you notice one.

“Is that DK? I think Jungkook introduced me to him when we were walking home a few weeks ago!” From where you are, you wave at DK. DK sees you from the corner of his eye and sends you a smile. He gestures for you to come over. For the second time, you smile politely and feel stuck.

What now?

“What’s Jungkook doing introducing you to DK and not me?” Mingyu chuckles, attempting to lighten the mood.

You purse your lips. “Ohh.. I get it.”

“Get what?”

“You’re cheeky,” you observe. “Yup… You’re definitely friends with Jungkook.”

Mingyu puts his hands up in surrender and then on your shoulders. “Guilty as charged.”

You laugh.

He likes your laugh. It’s soft and attractive—especially when you throw your head slightly back. Intrigued, he invites you to sit with them.

“You know the others, right? Hobi and them?”

“Yeah!” you answer him happily. “Hobi and I are actually pretty close—“

Mingyu’s puppy eyes light up with excitement. “Oh, shit really? So you don’t need to get to know them or anything?”

You blink at him.

“I guess?”

“Great!” Mingyu beams. “Good. Cool... Sit with me! I’ll introduce you to everyone.”

You know it’s all friendly nature.

Mingyu is known for being like this.

Goofy, a little deceptive, but a good guy overall. You have nothing to fear! Especially when he’s friends with Jungkook, right? He wouldn’t think of trying to flirt with you… Right?

What are you to Jungkook again?

Before you know it, Mingyu’s hands find yours. As he laces your fingers together, you feel your chest tighten.

This feels weird.

It feels like betrayal even though you know it’s not. Isn’t it ridiculous to be thinking this way?

You run excuses and options in your head.

Do you pull away and laugh it off? Do you just let him hold your hand and lead you to sit with him and the others? You aren’t sure… But the one thing that is clear is the look of annoyance on Jungkook’s face as he steps into the restaurant and his eyes land on your hands.

“Jungkook!”

As cinematic as it can be, that’s what it is. You shake Mingyu’s grasp off and rush to Jungkook. He’s completely taken aback, stumbling as you crash into him. A small laugh escapes his lips, as he finds your tiny charge at him to be the cutest thing you’ve done thus far. He barely walked in and you’re already in his arms.

Heaven, he thinks to himself.

As he wraps his arms around you, he kisses the top of your head. “Wow, look at you. Are you sure you’re my girl? Not shy anymore? Not avoiding me? I’m so proud of you, mi.”

He smells like him. Like his laundry detergent and his skin after his workout—a little sweaty but so addictive.

Is that weird?

Most importantly… Who cares?

He’s here.

You can breathe him in. You can breathe again.

You groan in embarrassment. Pulling away, you keep yourself close enough to rest your chin on his chest. He lowers his gaze at you, eyes softening as his lips curve into a pout.

“Bad day?”

“Better now,” you hum, hugging him tighter. He laughs and gently tickles your sides. Your laughter increases, causing you to let go of him. He takes your bag from your hands and swings it over his shoulder. His fingers brush against yours as you two walk to join your friends who go ahead and get seated.

“Hey, am I crazy or was Mingyu holding your hand—”

“___!” Mingyu calls for you.

You and Jungkook turn your heads and see him patting a place for you. Without a second thought, Jungkook lifts his hand to wave and you hold onto him tighter. Exchanging looks, he then proceeds to guide you towards his circle of friends and away from the ones you’re familiar with. Passing by Hobi, you give him a look.

A ‘help-me-get-out-of-this,’ look.

Hobi sticks his tongue out at you and mouths, “you’ll be fine, bitch.”

By the time you gather your thoughts, Jungkook has already introduced you to his other group of friends. You completely blank out as they respond and introduce themselves. It’s only for a few seconds and you already had an idea of who they all are anyway.

The campus calls them the 97 liners.

They’re known for being…

Boys.

Decent ones at that, but they’re definitely energetic. Amusing almost all the time, competitive and intimidating when they need to be. Through rumors and observations you’ve made from afar, it made sense to you where Jungkook gets his playfulness from.

He’s…

A lot like them.

He’s definitely himself. It’s interesting.

Mingyu scoots over, making enough room for you and Jungkook. He dabs Jungkook up, greeting him as warmly as he greeted you. The others continue their conversations, asking for your input every so often. You quickly realize how charismatic everyone is, and to be completely honest, it overwhelms you.

But with Jungkook beside you, it doesn’t feel like a bad thing. He squeezes your hand under the table every so often when he notices your gaze wander. It’s like he’s gravity to you.

“Okay, so we already ordered… But we can order again if there’s something specific ___ wants,” Mingyu says, rather bubbly. He clears his throat, reaches over the table, grabs the menu and offers it to you.

“Yah, yah, yah,” Jungkook sends a glare to Mingyu, yanking the menu from him. You turn to look at him and find that he doesn't look amused. His eyes are fixed at his friend. With an intimidating tone, he warns; “Mingyu, stop flexing.”

Mingyu shakes his head, not taking it seriously. Jungkook and him have always had a playful friendship anyways. “I don't know what you're talking about... I’m not flexing. ___, feel it! I swear I’m not flexing right now.”

Jungkook tightens his grip on your hands.

Taking a sip of your water, you take your time to swallow and gather your thoughts.

“Don’t you gym with Jungkook?”

Dumb question.

“I gym more than him,” Mingyu corrects you.

Wow.

Stupid answer.

You can't help it. A laugh escapes your lips. “Is that supposed to impress me?”

Jungkook lets out a hearty chuckle, liking the way you answer. He feels proud of you. He feels like he definitely chose the right girl.

Mingyu smirks, leaning back.

He thinks this is fun.

It is fun.

“Ehhh.. I mean, if you ever let me take you on a date, I’ll show you what it means to be impressed.”

Jungkook’s smile drops.

Yours does too.

You shift closer to Jungkook and avoid Mingyu's eyes.

“H-honestly, I’m not feeling picky tonight. I’m sure whatever you guys ordered will be delicious.”

The rest of the conversation is easygoing as everyone patiently waits for the food to arrive. Mingyu’s attention turns back to his friends, as he takes the hint from your avoidant eyes. To him, it was unserious.

Hopefully, it’s also whatever to you.

As the food arrives and is set on the table, Jungkook exchanges a few side comments and whispers context into your ear. You giggle and feel your heart race when he places his hand on your thigh.

“Jungkook…”

“Hm?”

“Your hand,” you warn.

“What about my hand?”

“It’s on my thigh.”

“I know,” he snickers. “Wish it was somewhere else.”

You gasp and can’t resist hitting his chest. He takes the hit like a man. He knows he deserves it.

On the table is a plate of shrimp. You pick one up with your chopsticks and begin to peel it. As Jungkook eats, you place the freshly peeled shrimp on top of his rice. He smiles at you brightly, his heart close to combusting.

“You didn’t have to—”

Jungkook’s words are cut off as you hear Mingyu whine, “Awh, no fair! Peel me one too, please!”

You nod and answer his request. Taking another shrimp and beginning to peel it, you then finish quickly and place it on top of his rice too.

Mingyu eats it happily.

Meanwhile, Jungkook’s chest tightens. Again, it’s such a minor thing to happen… Yet, it irks him so much. He’s no boy, though. This isn’t a perilla leaf tantrum—no, he was much too mature for that.

This was… Clarity.

In between bites, Mingyu brings up a fascinating topic.

“Why are you looking at her like that?” he blurts. Jungkook hadn’t even noticed he was looking at you a certain way. What was it? Was it too revealing of his feelings?

Wait… What even is he feeling?

There’s a sense of jealousy and frustration wrapped around the core of it all; his liking of you.

“I’m not looking at her in any way,” Jungkook responds, taking a sip of water. You continue to chew and look away.

“You totally are,” Mingyu laughs. “Hey, is it because you used to like her?”

Jungkook doesn’t miss a beat. “Where did you hear that?”

“Ohh.. So it’s not true, then?”

“Nah,” Jungkook scoffs. “I just don’t get why it’s a rumor and why it’s in the past tense. It’s true… I like her. She knows it too—wait, you fuck… Do you even read the group chat? I talk about her all the fucking time.”

Mingyu’s eyes light up.

“Oh my god!” he gasps, piecing everything together. “Shit, right. I remember now. God, why’d that take me so long to connect? Of course! This is ___. The ___! Ice skating bullshit, right? Pocky kiss or whatever?”

Your eyes widen as you turn to Jungkook. “You told them?”

Jungkook smiles innocently.

“I have the best kiss of my life and you expect me not to tell my boys?”

He has you there.

Mingyu laughs, murmuring about how down bad Jungkook is. When you feel your cheeks heat up, you quickly bury your face into your hands. You feel so embarrassed… But at the same time flattered.

It’s awful.

To make matters worse, the butterflies keep fluttering as Jungkook tilts his head and smirks at you. He finds your shyness the most precious thing in this entire world. The mere fact that he makes you feel and act like this?

Oh, it’s remarkable.

Jungkook can't help but compare your behavior from earlier to now. How you took initiative and ran into his arms as if they were your safe haven—and now there's this.

You like this, right now.

So utterly his without him much being done or said. It's an understanding. It's simply how it is.

He chuckles, as he wraps his arms around you and squeezes you into a tight hug.

“Ahh... You totally folded."

With his words, your eyes widen. You push him away and roll your eyes at him. He teases you, mocking the way you cling onto his body.

You huff but let him hold onto you. From here on out, you two keep it casual and continue your conversations with everyone. He piles food onto your plate and in exchange you bring the food to his mouth.

Jungkook eats happily.

When the dinner is over, everyone goes their separate ways. 

Jungkook’s friends all hug you goodbye (Mingyu takes his sweet time) and leave him to walk you home. Hand in hand, you two wave goodbye and earn a few winks from Hobi. To that, you roll your eyes and brush it off. 

The walk with Jungkook is nice. 

The conversation between you two is so natural and good. You talk about the presentation mess up in more detail and he listens well. He empathizes with your feelings and understands. He’s so easy to talk to. He gets you. He makes you laugh even when what he’s saying isn’t funny. 

Is this how it’s like when you have feelings for someone? 

How embarrassing. 

When you two reach your front door, he looks at you longingly. 

“Feel better?” he asks you. You notice how gentle is tone is. How thoughtful.

“… About everything? The presentation and shit… Bebu, at the end of the day you did what you could. The grade your received is literally still an A—w-what”

Jungkook is startled. 

You grasp the fabric of his hoodie and pull him close. Without a second thought, you take a step closer to him and lean in. With urgency, you kiss him. 

Deep. 

Needy. 

Lovingly. 

His eyes flutter shut as you deepen the kiss with your tongue. He gives you way, parting his mouth open for you to explore and do as you please. As he kisses you back with the same kind of energy, you smile into the kiss. 

When you pull away, Jungkook is in disbelief. 

“... Now what?”

You clear your throat, feeling your lips tingling from the kiss. 

“S-sorry,” you gulp. “I d-don’t know what came over me… I just—”

“Why are you apologizing?” he blinks at you slowly. “I didn’t ask for an apology. I asked, now what?”

You tighten your lips. 

“Now? I… I just need some air.” 

Jungkook nods his head, eyebrows furrowed together. He understands you. 

Before you can open your mouth to defend or redirect, he beats you to it. 

“Yeah? Me too.”

Before you know it, he kisses you. 

Jungkook kisses you like a silent plea. Even though he has already confessed; this felt like another. 

The way he kisses you feels like a new language. He knows just when you kiss you more and when you to be delicate. He cups your jaw with the palm of his hand, tilting your head so he can kiss you better.

Which is so fucking weird… But it happens like never before.

He kisses you better.

Breaking away from the kiss, you two catch your breaths. As you do so, you clear your throat.

“Wanna come inside?” you ask, taking his hand.

He smirks, unable to stop himself. 

“Sure… But I’m gonna need some clarification on that offer… Come inside where?”

In your dimly lit kitchen, you two make yourselves a cup of tea.

Jungkook multitasks by making passes—saying that the water is still cold since you’re hotter than it. He sneaks in a few kisses on your cheeks as you tell him he’s being stupid. You two laugh as he lifts you up to sit on your kitchen island. He makes himself comfortable in between your legs.

There, you caress his hair.

He is so handsome. You love the way his nose just fits his face… How round his eyes are and even the scar on his cheek. It’s so precious.

He’s perfect, you think to yourself.

As you get lost in your thoughts, Jungkook feels so much comfort and freedom with your touch. It feels like rest. For a moment, he shuts his eyes and takes in how much he loves your touch.

Breaking the silence, you tug on his hair. “You need a haircut.”

He shakes his head, eyes still closed.

“Literally got one two weeks ago.”

“Yeah,” you realize he’s right. He did cut his hair two weeks ago. He came over that night just to show it off. “... But I liked Mingyu’s hair! It was so short. I feel like it would suit you too.”

He opens one eye and gives you a weird look.

You mimic it.

“What?”

Jungkook lifts his face.

“So… Was it just me but I definitely caught Mingyu trying to shoot his shot with you, right?” He snickers, tilting his head as he recalls what he saw. "He literally asked you out."

You shrug, explaining Mingyu's attempt to hold your hand as a friendly gesture. "He’s just friendly, right? He also tried to hold my hand to lead me to the table and that was kinda… Unexpected? But he’s like that, right? He’s just friendly. Like a puppy! Golden retriever energy.”

"Maybe," Jungkook responds, his tone betraying a hint of uncertainty. "Y-yeah. I mean, the shrimp thing was worse."

You laugh softly. "What? This is about the shrimp thing? I peeled it for you too… And it’s not like I peeled his because I wanted to. He asked. It was lighthearted."

"I know that," he reassures you, his tone softening. "I’m not that insecure to pick a fight over peeling shrimp. You don’t have to convince me it was nothing. I know it was nothing.”

Confusion flashes across your face at his mixed signals. "Are you upset?"

"Maybe," he admits quietly.

Then he hesitates.

“Actually, I think I’m frustrated. I’m not mad. Sorry if I sounded aggressive—"

"N-no, it’s fine," you reassure him, gently cutting him off. "Why are you frustrated, bebu?"

Jungkook offers you a weak smile. "I don’t get it…"

"Get what?"

"All this shit and we’re still not together.”

Your brows furrow slightly in confusion.

Taken aback, you ask him, “what’s that supposed to mean?"

Gesturing between the two of you, Jungkook expresses his confusion. "This… I mean, what is this? We’re together, aren’t we?"

"Jungkook—"

"I’m just… I don’t get it. Even if you thought he was just being friendly, why didn’t you just say you were my girlfriend? Mingyu would’ve stopped flirting with you."

"So it’s my fault?" you huff, feeling offended at the pitch of this idea. "I thought your friends knew—"

"Well… Yes. I talk about you, and it’s not like I’m ditching parties to study in that stupid library—"

"Can you leave the library out of this?"

"Okay," he sighs, relenting. "Sorry… I just… They know how I feel about you. I guess they don’t know how you feel about me, and… I mean, did you tell him we were together or not? Because if I had to remind him who you were to me, I don’t think you told him that we—"

"Jungkook—"

"No, I’m being serious," he interrupts, his tone becoming more stern. "Why didn’t you just—"

"You never asked me out!" you interject, frustration evident in your voice.

Jungkook stares at you blankly, prompting you to continue. He runs everything back in his mind.

You were right.

With all these moments, he’s been so busy planning how to get reactions out of you and completely missed out on so many perfect opportunities.

“You never asked me to be your girlfriend. All you’ve been doing this entire time is trying to get me to flirt with you, kiss you, or trick me into dates… You want me to act like your girlfriend? Ask me to be. I’m not built for situationships… And honestly? I’ve been waiting—patiently and elegantly at that. There were so many times where I wanted to hold your hand and give in. You talk about how you’ll get me to fold or whatever—fine.”

You take a breath, caving in. “This is it. I’ve folded! God, do you even know how hard it is to study next to you in that stupid library because y-you… You give me butterflies.”

Jungkook reaches for you. You let him touch you but your heart stays still, fighting to get these feelings out. Your voice wavers with emotion.

“A-and it’s so… I don’t know how you do it. At some point, I set them free. Like, fine, okay! Fly high, my butterflies… But for what?"

There’s a sense of urgency that awakens in you. Never in your life have you ever felt the same way for anyone.

It feels like defeat and victory all at once.

It feels like peace and war all at once.

It feels like love.

Oh, the madness.

To love someone this wide and deep… To love someone at all. It is everything beyond you. How it radiates through your body and onto his lips… How everything unfolds and reveals him no matter what.

You can’t decide if the way you’ve fallen is utterly heartbreaking or romantic. Maybe it’s both.

Let’s say it’s both.

All you know is that with glossy eyes and a fragmented understanding of timing, you tell him;

“Jungkook, I set my butterflies free, and they flew to you."

[bakugoushotwife]

kinktober day ten: breeding kink

>>> so i actually think he would be able to get his partner preggers but that's because i say so xoxo but also bc maybe ce doesn't affect the reproductive system?? idc if it does he deserves a family!

>>> starring: choso kamo x curvy!fem!reader >>> cw: breeding kink thank you, pregnancy kink, choso is obsessed w his wife hours, oral (fem), creampie, >>> wc: 2.2k >>> event masterlist:

he’ll never forget the day you told him you were pregnant. it was something he had considered impossible, to the point he never bothered wearing a condom or cumming anywhere but inside you. seeing you pregnant only made sure those things wouldn’t change. you were already so perfect to him that it was almost unnerving, even all these years of marriage in. he fell in love with you the moment he met you back in shibuya, but somehow you had become even more beautiful to him. 

he was obsessed, almost to the point of embarrassment, if choso understood the concept in regards to his love for his wife. but he wasn’t shy about being yours. it was all so new to him, the idea of fatherhood, viewing you as a mother, watching you change before his very eyes and all the long doctors appointments. he loves it though, oddly enough. especially the notion of being a dad and watching your body and mindset shift and grow. 

choso can tend to be clueless due to his rather unconventional navigation of life, but ever since he learned how to work a cell phone, the internet has been his very best friend. unfortunately, yuji can give some very…troublesome advice. choso thinks it’s a miracle he’s still alive at times. so google can help in ways his earnest younger brother cannot, giving him multiple opinions and sources on what to do and how to do it. he spends hours of his time researching how to care for you; wanting to know if it was normal to be this attracted to you while you were all moody and pouty with just the start of roundness at the bottom of your belly—the jury was still out on that one, by the way. 

one thing that was normal was your increased need for him, not like he was complaining. he loved this side effect the most, able to satiate his perverse desire to keep stuffing his already pregnant wife full, relishing in how eager and frankly nasty you had gotten. you were damn near insatiable, and choso thought he was in heaven for it. all through your first and second trimesters, you couldn’t get enough of him—and the feeling was mutual. as you grew larger and the house became cluttered with baby shower gifts and preparations for baby kamo, he continued to clock hours towards his family. he read article after article on parenting, actively assembling the nursery and searching up names with you. he was beyond joyful, still unable to believe that you were growing his son or daughter within that gorgeous body of yours, your breasts had started to swell and your hips had begun to spread. he loved every second of this: your neediness, everything about how you look while making him a father, and the way his friends circled around him and became such a supportive family. 

his thoughts bordered on crazy, a haunting desire to keep you like this all the time, lounging around the house in your pretty maternity dresses doing nothing but being waited on hand and foot; relaxing while stroking your swelling stomach. it’s what suited you best, he thinks—stretched out along the couch basking in the rays of the sun beating in through the living room window, snacking on a fruit board he made you and baby. he’s nearly foaming at the mouth, your long robe-style dress clinging to all the delicious curves of your body; the light cotton seemed to outline your heavy boobs, tight around your semi-hardened nipples. it hugged your six-and-a-half-month sized bump, your other hand resting there protectively. choso was stuck in the moment, trying to commit every detail of you to memory. he almost didn’t hear your chortle of disbelief. 

“you said what, now, babe?” you whip your head towards him, heart fluttering violently at what he uttered— you needed him to say it again. it was easy to grow addicted to your husband, building his spawn had you needier than ever. even the smell of him had you going absolutely feral level insane even though this pregnancy had been the highlight of your life so far. you thought your clinginess and desire was driving him to his own insanity, figuring he must hate tending to you and your attitude as of late. you must have just heard him incorrectly. 

“huh?” he blinked, violet eyes refocusing on your plush lips speaking to him. “what did i say?” he asks, just as confused as you are. his cheeks darken anyways, as if you caught him doing something naughty, which only makes you believe your ears were in fact not deceiving you. 

“you said you should keep me like this all time.” you chuckle, full on tilting your head towards him from your spot on the sofa. he averts his gaze as soon as you meet him, and you let out a teasing fake gasp. “my husband wants to keep me barefoot and pregnant, huh? you know that’s pretty outdated…” 

he shakes his head, embarrassed immediately. great, now you thought he was some sick perv, which isn’t completely off base, he guessed, but still! it wasn’t like that, he didn’t view you like some machine built only to churn out his kids and cook him dinner! 

“n-no! i mean—you look great like this, b—” 

“i’m just fucking around, love. i thought it was sexy.” you grin, throwing a wink his way. he clicks his tongue at you and huffs at the teasing, even though he’s definitely intrigued by the latter half of your sentence. you arch your brow, waiting for him to ask for clarification. you could see him fighting it in his head before your very eyes. the scrunch of his nose tells you that you’ve won. 

“yeah? what’s that supposed to mean?” he says from his spot in the recliner nearby, always opting to be close to you. you smile knowingly at him, humming in thought mostly for the dramatics. 

“mayhaps i enjoy the idea of you keeping me pregnant…especially if i get spoiled like this every time.” you giggle, shrugging a little bit. “maybe i’ll feel differently after i actually have this one.” you pat your tummy affectionately, and he thinks he may be drooling. you always play so coy, but he can see the way you rub your thighs together and the clouds that darken in your sunshiney eyes. he may be regularly clueless, but the one thing he knows all too well is your body. 

“hm, i think it’s because you’re a sex-crazed maniac now and know pregnancy gets you off the hook.” he deadpans, though his heart is beating rapidly in his chest and in his cock. you call his bluff, rolling your eyes viciously. 

“isn’t that the pot calling the kettle black.” you huff, spreading your legs out on the couch in a silent command. he smirks, not at all caring that you caught him. he nods a bit, holding his hands up. 

“got me. i just didn’t know how much i would love this.” he says, the husk in his voice sends a shiver down your spine. your thighs press together when he obeys your body language, rising from his seat and making his way to the couch. he sits at your feet of course, smiling so sweetly. his warm hands gently pry your knees apart, and you wonder if he knows just how seductive the look he gives you is. his chin is angled down, hooded purple eyes singing a siren song that makes your legs fall apart again and your fingers pull at the tie keeping your dress together. he growls at the sight of your exposed body, his hands rubbing trails from your knees to your hips and down your thighs again. “you’re so perfect…can you blame me?” 

you roll your eyes but wear a stupid grin at his praise, shaking your head to his question. you knew better than to be insecure over your changing body, especially with all the extra attention it’s garnered you. truth be told, you had never felt more beautiful, the life growing inside you breathing new life into your own appearance, and your husband never missed an opportunity to make you feel like a goddess amongst mortals. he would never dream of making you uncomfortable or asking you to accommodate him, so he folds himself into the space he has so that his face hovers above your shiny middle. his breath alone makes you moan, a hand flying up to cover your embarrassment. you always react like you’ve never been touched before and choso loves it almost as much as the sight of your round stomach and even rounder mounds above. he brings his thumb over you, wanting to watch you as he draws slow circles over your hardened clit. he hums, a little smile on his face as you jerk and squirm. your hips buck into his mouth instantly with cute whines slipping past your lips as your hands struggle to reach for his collarbone length black hair. he leans up a bit to help you, just the feeling of his rough thumb pad against your need turned you into a mess within seconds. 

“nngh–oh choso, feels so–mmph good already.” you gasp, hands dropping to fondle your aching breasts. he nods and sits up to spit a warm and fat glob on your cunt, his thick thumb dragging it all over your spasming need. the lewdness of his action coupled with the nonchalant way he watches, tongue poking around your hole like nothing ever happened, has your brain spinning without much effort. your hips drive into the relief he offers, chasing your orgasm like you’d never before experienced one—despite the clear proof otherwise. he allows it, never in his life would he keep you from feeling good. he’s honored to be the one who causes those pretty sounds to fill the room, to be the father of the child making your beauty so ethereal, to be the man tongue deep in your perfect pussy. “gonna–ohhhh–” 

your sweet release coats his tongue, his thumb still working you down slowly so he could relish in the face you make from sheer pleasure. he sits back up, a little more comfortable on his knees as he leans over you to give you a sloppy kiss filled with your own essence. he’s had to be much more careful since you’re getting bigger, but he doesn’t mind making sweet love to his beautiful baby mama. you wrap your arms around his neck, keeping his mouth against you while his hands are busy freeing himself from his sweatpants. you gasp into his mouth when you feel his length parting your folds and prodding at your hole. he only nibbles at your lip to tell you that he’ll be gentle, sheathing himself within your wet warmth slowly. you tense around him and relax, sighing happily at the feeling of him rocking into you at a tender pace. he moves his kisses to the sides of your cheeks, your jaw, picking up his speed until he has to sit back up properly to angle himself right. 

“more, you’re not gonna break me daddy.” you pant, hand braced on the ridges of his defined abs. he sighs begrudgingly, only because he’d been repressing the same urge ever since you welcomed him inside. he relents, lifting one of your legs to rest against his hip before driving into you a bit harder. you moan wildly and nod, nearly screaming. “god—just like that.” 

“anything for you mama, s’cute you need it hard, such a good girl letting me get a little rough.” he grunts, squeezing the hold he has on your thigh. you feel so different, still so tight and warm but with a different kind of wetness. he’s a mess too, championing himself with that nickname you bestowed upon him. his strokes are so well-timed, letting you feel every drag of his cock against you, the tip of him nailing the spot you need him most. “so perfect. you gonna let me keep this pretty hole bred?” 

you nod, the words sending you close to your tipping point. you shake your head, too gone to speak to let him know that you were going to cum. you don’t have to tell him though, he can tell from the intense fluttering of your sloppy cunt, and he’s happy to have lasted this long trapped in your clutches. you’re slapping at his stomach, legs shaking around him as you scream again, the sound so primal it sends goosebumps prickling along his skin right before he’s stuffing you full as if you weren’t already carrying his seed. you squeeze down on him, making sure he empties his balls in you. he stays there until he goes soft, and then he slumps against the side of the couch. your giggles make him perk up, his violet eyes cutting over to see you crawling towards him with a mischievous glint to your eyes. he knows he’s right when you swing your leg over his lap, angling him back inside you. 

“don’t worry—just wanna sit on it.” you titter, wrapping your arms around his neck again, pressing your body as close as you could for a hug. he twitches from sensitivity as you lower yourself back over him, but a smile spreads across his face all the same. 

“how many kids can i give you, mama?” he groans in your ear as his arms tighten around your waist securely.

[carnal-lnstinct]

I have a request!!! This is a story i will write someday, but I trust an amazing writer like yourself for this! Vegeta is in situationship with the reader, and realizes one day that he actually cares about her and loves her. In my head, this is an no powers au, and the reader is younger than him and she already is in love with him. I know this is not very specific 😅 but you can work around it however you want and you can ignore the details i gave if they bother you as well! But thank you so much for reading all my vague idea 💗

Pairing: Vegeta x Reader ( implied afab ) Content: M/18. MINORS DNI. au: modern au / no powers. wealthy!Vegeta. age difference; (40-45!Vegeta x 24-30!Reader). established fuck buddies. pining. A/N: A perfect concept! ♥ This one was a challenge only because I am never good at modernizing Vegeta or focusing on age difference, but I enjoyed this a lot! I’d love to take a crack at this concept again in the future with a better grasp of it.

Too open…Too small…Too thin…A cropped jacket? Really? He seemed to have a look of disgust at them all, impatiently watching your hand ghost over the wares on the wall and immediately feeling his jaw clench from each inappropriate one you dared to show a little interest in. Your smaller hand kept getting swallowed up in his coat sleeves as you moved down the aisle, it was starting to bother him to watch you fidget and constantly adjust in it. He can’t help but notice how you did your best to hold it over your frame while browsing and making this longer than it should have been.

You turn to him when another catches your eye in your favorite color, gauging his favor at the choice, and then moving on to the next when the squint in his eyes says “no”. 

His gaze skims a little further ahead of you as if to speed up this process by handling it himself. One of these coats had to be suitable for you, one that sits well on your shoulders, and the zipper won't bulge or fight to get over your chest. But your neck should still peek, he muses, and be able to breathe without a restricting collar. Your curves shouldn't be hidden under the material…Maybe a scarf to go with-

“—What the hell am I even doing here? You don't need me to buy a simple coat.” Vegeta caught himself and finally spoke up. He turned his nose up at this scenario, a hint of a growl in his tone. “I told you a long time ago to get a better one.” 

He couldn’t wait to throw that in your face. You’re actually impressed he held his tongue for so long and you give him an innocent shrug in response. It was beginning to get hard to read his outburst as anything more than his bark now as he donned that predictable scowl you loved so much. “Sorry. If you want your coat back you can take it now.” The large sleeves easily slide down your smaller arms. 

“Just hurry this up already. It's getting late.” He grimaced, speaking up quickly and stopping you from taking it off so soon. He's annoyed, even though it was his idea to bring you here for a better coat. You figured he was more annoyed with beating the idea in your ear almost every time you met and you continued to show up in your favorite old jacket regardless. You'd argue your old coat was handy! It did keep you warm getting from your front door to your car and vice versa. But then you were reckless and came to his front door without even that, the trek back to your car to get it feeling pointless when you were about to go inside anyway. Vegeta didn’t even say anything to you when the door opened, he just felt the rush of cold air pass the threshold before you and leered at you.

Then his thicker, slightly heavier coat hit your back and shoulders after he left you in the doorway and you understood that you had been lying to yourself for too long. The material was too cozy to not immediately get taken into its soothing warmth, snuggling it and shoving your hands into the deep pockets. Having only a moment to soak it all in, you were then promptly dragged away by the fuming man as he led you to his car. And now you’re here, scanning the coat section of a store you’d never think to set foot in. Still, you’re excited to be here.

Out in public with him, wearing something that belongs to him, needlessly—in your opinion—shopping for a replacement coat with him. You felt deeply acknowledged. Accepted. Your heart is restless in your chest while you try to contain yourself moving up and down the coat aisle. It's not like you had much in common outside of your attraction, so to share more than a few hours sweaty and naked with him was a nice change of pace. It left you wondering if he finally started to see the extent of your feelings for him or if you were just embellishing his generosity to be something more meaningful. He certainly doesn't seem to treat you differently than others aside from what you give each other in private, but there are instances like this that make you feel cared for like no other.

That same scowl watched over you now as you continued to gloss over the selection of coats and took note of the way you shifted your search from fashionable to functional by how you carefully looked over the price tags. Once you’re sure you’ve settled on one after a few meticulous moments, you turn back to him only to see he has moved from where he planted his feet to observe you. You let go of the hanger and move out of the aisle looking around and still fixing his jacket on you. That’s when you found his familiar silhouette at the register already, stuffing something in his pocket. His hand raises to the sales rep stopping them from bagging up the item on the counter and takes it in his hands. He sees you coming out of the aisle and walks up to you.

“Let’s go, we’re done here.”

“But I didn’t find-” Your favorite color fills your sights as he places a coat in your hand. A shade and taper at the waist that blends in with your wardrobe, and material that matched the heavy jacket hanging on your shoulders.

“Put it on.” It sounded like an order, but it’s just his impatience rearing itself again. Regardless, you don’t hesitate to switch the coats. 

The smell, the texture, and a fit that doesn’t bind your shoulders and arms. You rush to a mirror to see it on yourself and gush at your reflection. He found this for you. He bought it for you and was sure to remove the price tag so you wouldn’t gawk at it. There was an emotional twinkle in your eyes when you turned back to him. Of all the things you wanted to say, all rushing to your tongue, “Thank you, Vegeta” is all you were able to get out and clutched the cozy new fabric to yourself. Your heart was pounding and his scowl softened.

Without a word, he gestures his head toward the door with his returned coat under his arm began to head for the exit. You rushed to his side, clinging to his other arm with your face on his shoulder and the biggest smile on your face. Vegeta stiffened at your firm grip but didn’t flinch away, holding the door open for you to exit first, your smaller hands shifting to hold his as he tailed you out the door. 

Once you were back in the car and on the way back to his home, all the words you sat with piled up on the tip of your tongue again and caused you to fidget with his coat in your lap. You tried to distract yourself by scrolling through your phone and giving your feelings a chance to settle, but you couldn’t help stopping to admire the fabric of your new coat and the adorable opalescent fastens at your wrist keeping the sleeves from sliding up and down your arm. It’s too fancy for words. Suddenly inspired, you lift your phone and angle it up at yourself for a selfie in it. A thought crossed your mind, and you leaned over toward the driver’s side intending to capture both of you. You see his eyes flick from the road for a moment and his resting glare becomes more prominent.

“Who is that for?” He asked with his usual condescending tone.

“Me. You don’t mind?” He shrugs in response, uncaring on the matter by your answer and your eyes light up. “Really? You’re okay taking pictures with me?”

“...Do I need to make a face or something?”

You giggle, “No. Just smile with me.” That seemed to be the grueling part by the way his frown stretched skeptically. But he rolled his eyes and complied with a half-hearted smirk for your picture. 

You have teased that his scowl makes him look older, but no one would know by simply looking at him that there is an evident gap between your generations. A man like him had no business giving you the attention he did and that’s probably why the approach to your relationship is so ambiguous. Moreover, unlike you, he comes from old money and most likely has “old money expectations”. There is a sense of entitlement to what he has and what he wants that proves that prestigious background. You could consider yourself as recreational to him as a round of golf or sipping cocktails in an infinity pool but you would just hurt your own feelings thinking like that.

A girl like you had to just be for a bit of fun for him though, right? Young and naive and swearing your independence is solid. But your feelings for him are real. It is his reliable presence and fantastic cock that keep you in contact with him, but also his mysterious allure. You wish you could figure out where you stood between what he has or wants, or if you truly are just a dalliance. Sometimes he treats you like he already has you and expects certain things about you that show his adoration beyond your body, but he's never directly said he wanted you for more than company for a night or two. To buy you something as permanent as a coat felt like a claim over you. He wants you comfortable against the cold even when he’s not around, and he doesn’t hesitate to fix that when you keep putting it off. But the fact of the matter is you’re just going back to his house so you could fuck.

“...Do I-...” Your tone broke and you cleared your throat, hesitating again. You don’t want to ambush him over the matter but you really want to get this off your chest. You glance up from your phone and his head is tilted towards you with his eyes still on the road.

“Speak up.”

“I-It’s nothing.” You quickly answer, shrug, and sit quietly for an endless minute. Then, you swallow your nerves. “...I just didn’t think I meant that much to you to do this.” Your hands slide down the collar of your cozy coat as you grip it and keep your eyes in your lap.

“Tch, It’s just a coat.” Vegeta brushed off the gesture.

“An expensive coat…” You corrected. “You picked this out and made them remove the tag so I can’t see how much to pay you back for it. So… unless I’m just… like your little baby doll now-”

“It’s a coat.” He firmly insisted, then scoffs. “You know how annoying it is to tell you to do something and you don’t do it? You freeze your ass off every time you show up on the entrance camera. What if I was on the other side of the house when you showed up?” 

Waiting in the cold would feel like an eternity, you admitted to yourself. His house isn’t small, further proof of his prestige. “But I know you’re gonna let me in and warm me up. You don’t have to buy me a new coat.”

“And then you’re back out in the cold..” He huffs out a laugh as he shakes his head. “...Freezing in your car waiting for it to warm up again with that thin thing you call a jacket. No.” His driving posture relaxes, the older man's head and spine sinking back against his seat. “...I wanted to. Okay?”

“...Okay.” Your prepared rebuttal of your self-sufficiency falters in response to his suddenly softer tone. The dull pink in your cheeks and the rise of butterflies in response gave him your submission. You stare at him quietly for a moment watching the way his eyes flicked in thought and he finally sighed. 

“I don’t know what I’m doing with you anymore…” Vegeta concedes and he freed a hand from the wheel to rub his forehead. There's an instance where his expression relaxes into one you've never seen, but as he begins to air his grievances his brows furrowed in their familiar way. “I don’t know what you want, you don’t ask me for anything. You only show up when I call, and gone before the sun is up. Is it the house? Do I scare you when we’re not just getting off?”

“No. No. I just thought…” Your breath trembles as you inhale and then you can't stop the words falling out once you let it go. “I don’t know, I just don’t wanna bother you or get in the way of your lifestyle. That’s why we just meet and fuck, right?”

“I want you in the way, damn it! I’m not just tolerating you for an easy fuck.” He suddenly bursts out and speaks in an accusatory tone. “You just don't act like you want more than that.”

It wasn’t as affectionate or romantic as you let your imagination curate it, but without a doubt that was the validation your lovesick heart sought. That's when the car stopped. You were back at his house. Something about his eyes fully on you now makes your thoughts spill like a broken pipe. 

“I couldn't tell if you wanted more than that. We’ve only been doing it since we met. I thought It was much too soon to…fall for you like this..” You confessed, the uncertainty no longer in your voice. 

“Believe it or not, it is more than your body that interests me. If you want to take things slower..”

The corners of your mouth twitch as you try to contain your smile, tightening your lips shut. You suddenly feel shy with this man who makes your eyes well up with tears trying to hold his entire cock in your mouth. Taking it slower means more time out together and you can’t help thinking about the dates you could go on that aren’t just a wine and dine for foreplay. Though you love that. 

You lift your eyes to him and let your smile spread. “It doesn’t have to start tonight…” You suggest, your eyes reflecting the deep attraction you had for him right now. You get a smile in return, not that prideful or crooked smirk but a genuine smile and it makes you bite your lip enticingly. He did buy you a beautiful and comfy coat, after all. You should show your gratitude as you unbuckle your seatbelt and climb over your seat into his waiting arms.

[aaron-m-geist-ff]

Mahito hears that y/n is bisexual and decides to transfigure himself into a woman 🤭

Smut, smut, smut ✨ just 7,000 words of pure smut

Mahito sat criss-cross on the floor in front of you.

You were perched on your knees, ignoring the burning sensation in your thighs as you worked. It was going to look so cute once you were done.

“Enjoying yourself, y/n?” Mahito mused.

He sounded playful. Ever since you were forced to spend all of your time on him, he seemed to be in a very good mood.

“Absolutely. I love playing with your hair like this,” you replied. “Why do guys always have such pretty hair? You have naturally long eyelashes too.”

Every man you had ever met had nice long lashes. Meanwhile, you needed to wear mascara to even make your own lashes visible to others. It just wasn’t fair. Sometimes you wondered if Mahito had prettier features than you did. He was certainly pleasing to look at.

Mahito snickered at you.

“You human girls are so confusing. It’s difficult to tell what you are attracted to. With curses it’s rather easy, they simply want power and are drawn to it like a moth to a flame.”

He was resting his elbows on his knees as he spoke.

You could feel your cheeks flushing just from the way that Mahito expressed himself. He always sounded so goddamn attractive with that logical tone of his. Just a hint of youthfulness laced in his tone. It was unique and it drove you crazy every time. You could listen to him talk for hours.

“We’re not that confusing! Of course, every woman is different, but most of us can agree that personality is the most important feature in a man,” you explained.

You didn’t want Mahito to start thinking that you only cared about superficial things. Looks were just a nice added bonus in your opinion. Your fingers kept working, gently maneuvering the different strands of hair in order to make a nice french braid. You almost felt like you were at a sleepover. It was kinda fun.

“Hm,” Mahito hummed thoughtfully.

“So things like penis size don’t really matter?”

He kept staring straight ahead, remaining perfectly still so as not to disrupt your work.

You had to giggle at the question.

“Well…It does matter a little bit. But don’t worry, I like your size a lot.”

It was strange how comfortable you felt with Mahito. You weren’t even shy discussing this topic with him. It felt completely natural to do so. As if he was your long term boyfriend or something.

Mahito didn’t say anything after that, so you figured that it was your job to keep the conversation going. Curses weren’t the best at interpreting social cues.

“What’s your favorite color?” You asked.

You grumbled in frustration for a moment. One of the strands was in the wrong place, so you had to undo a row of braids and start over. It had been years since you did a french braid on someone. But Mahito’s hair was so pretty that you just couldn’t help yourself.

“I never understood the concept of picking favorites. There is really nothing to be gained by doing so,” he answered calmly.

Mahito wasn’t fazed by the constant pulling at his hair. He simply allowed you to do as you pleased. And he sounded logical as always when he replied. You sighed at him.

“Come on, Mahi! There has to be a color that you like. Just think about it.”

You found his logical nature to be charming and attractive, but you really wanted to see more of his playful side again.

Mahito giggled.

“Well, your eye color is fairly nice to look at. I think I’ll go with that one.”

He placed his hands in his lap, sitting patiently.

You paused for a moment. That was actually rather sweet of him. It warmed your heart to know that Mahito liked little details like that. But you had to laugh at his answer.

“You know what? You kind of sound like a woman with a response like that,” you teased. “So romantic.”

You knew that men could be romantic too, but Mahito just acted so soft sometimes. It really tugged at your heartstrings. And of course you would take any opportunity to tease him because he never held back with you in that regard.

“…You would like that, huh?”

Mahito asked the question innocently, but with a serious tone.

“I remember what your mother said,” he added. “That you used to experiment with girls your age as a teenager.”

Your hands froze in his hair.

Your eyes widened slightly.

Shit…You had forgotten about that day. But Mahito was right, your mom definitely called you out with zero hesitation. She was always quick to bring up the past.

You definitely still liked women, a lot. Even when you were on dating apps you had the settings adjusted for both genders.

“Y-yeah…I like both genders equally,” you said.

You swallowed thickly before continuing to braid. Shit. Why were you nervous to admit that? It felt a bit scandalous to say it out loud.

You quickly finished up the braid and tied the end with your hair tie.

“Okay! All done,” you practically chirped.

Mahito turned around then.

Only…

Fucking hell.

“Do you like me this way?” Mahito asked. He gave you a sweet smile, his now feminine features full of joy.

But you were more focused on his chest. Or… ‘her’ chest?? Mahito had transfigured his own body to switch genders. She now sat before you as the female version of herself. She looked so goddamn pretty with her cute face and big breasts. They even looked slightly bigger than your own. You could instantly feel a bit of arousal pooling in your groin.

Her breasts were constricted by the fabric of her shirt. Though, obviously she wasn’t wearing a bra. Those perky nipples could be seen a mile away. You seriously had to fight the urge to drool.

“Uh,” you started stupidly. Goddammit. You couldn’t think straight. It had been so long since you had a good taste of pussy. You were practically starving for it. You loved Mahito’s male form a lot. His dominant energy and perfect cock gave you so many orgasms it was ridiculous. But there was something about him turning into a cute woman which made the switch flip in your brain.

You were feeling dominant.

The urge to fuck her senseless was starting to take over. You could feel your cheeks steadily growing warmer just from the lewd ideas which popped into your mind.

“God…” you uttered. “Yes. Of course I like you this way.”

You were shamelessly looking at Mahito’s body. She was definitely curvy in all the right places. You wanted to sink your teeth into the plump skin of her thighs and feel her shivering beneath your touch. It was all you could think of.

Mahito looked so cute when she smiled at you, her hair pulled back in the braid. She tilted her head to the side playfully.

“What do you like the most?”

Her voice was definitely feminine. Fuck. She sounded so soft and elegant when she spoke, like a princess or something. You suddenly felt like some kind of creepy man even though you were also a woman.

You shuddered.

“…I love these,” you said.

You reached forward, grasping both of Mahito’s breasts without an ounce of shame. They felt so soft in your hands. You really wanted to be respectful, but you just couldn’t stop yourself from groping them. You squeezed possessively. God. You wanted to roll those cute little nipples between your fingers but you weren’t sure how Mahito would feel about that. He was usually very dominant and hated being submissive. Maybe that would be different if he was a woman now.

You stared into her face.

…Her cheeks were pink.

She blinked at you a few times, before averting her gaze.

Was Mahito embarrassed…?

You had actually never seen that before. It seriously caught you off guard. You had no idea how to react, but your instincts were screaming at you to just fuck her already. But you needed to be respectful.

You cupped Mahito’s plump breasts in your hands still, squeezing them softly.

“Do you not like this?”

You tried to keep your voice a bit hushed. You didn’t want to overwhelm Mahito with too much at once. But goddamn did you want to escalate things further. You really had to hold yourself back.

Mahito continued to stare at the wall to the side.

“…I-it’s fine,” she stuttered.

You bit your bottom lip, desperately holding yourself back from completely ravishing her. This was just too good. Mahito had no right to look that adorable as she avoided eye contact. And the way her voice wavered was so delicious.

If she was behaving like this now, then you seriously wondered how she would react to a tongue pressed against her clit.

You couldn’t take it anymore.

You leaned forward, stealing Mahito’s lips in a kiss.

“Mh!” Mahito yelped.

That only spurred you on even more. You had never heard such a noise escape your lover before. It excited you to no end. You slid your tongue past her pretty lips, exploring her mouth with no resistance. Your hands dropped down to grip her waist firmly.

Mahito’s body felt weaker…Softer.

You knew that she was still incredibly strong, but she was openly submitting to you. Her fingers latched onto your arm, gently holding you as she returned the kiss. The behavior was so demure that it made your head spin. Your lips glided against hers carefully. It felt sinfully good. You deepened the kiss and Mahito’s fingers tightened against your arm from the sensations.

You breathed in deeply once you pulled away, climbing to your feet and extending your hand.

“Come on,” you murmured. “Let’s take this to the bed.”

You were growing impatient. You wanted to slide your fingers into that tight pussy and feel how wet she was for you. It was all you could think of. The idea of dominating Mahito had struck you once before, ages ago when you fucked his face. You had praised him and even made him blush from it. But he fucked you into the mattress immediately afterward. Whenever Mahito was male presenting, his dominance was unshakable. You were very interested to see just how submissive he could be in his female form. His hormones had likely changed along with the shape of his body.

Mahito nodded at you, taking your hand.

Her hand was quite small, actually. It was delicate looking. You held onto her firmly as you guided her towards the bed. It wasn’t long before you had her pressed against the sheets, impatiently prying at the hem of her baggy shirt.

“Take this off, baby.”

You couldn’t help but call her a cute name like that. Mahito was staring up at you with such a submissive gaze. It made your heart skip a beat. She opened her mouth as if she wanted to reply, but no words came out.

Mahito slowly took off her shirt. She seemed a little hesitant as she laid there with her chest exposed, her cheeks reddening steadily.

“…I have never tried this before,” Mahito admitted softly. “It feels strange not having a penis between my legs.”

She sounded logical still, but there was a certain edge to her tone. She was nervous.

Goddamn. So many sinful ideas began rushing through your head. You wanted to make this good for her. Show Mahito what it’s like to experience an orgasm in a female body. You knew that you could manage it. But you were seriously starting to feel like a pervert for staring at Mahito’s large breasts for so long. The stitch marks ran across her skin in the same familiar patterns.

It took you a moment to process what Mahito said. You stared down at her as you replied calmly.

“Would you like to touch your new parts? You must be curious.”

You really didn’t want to make Mahito anxious. That was not your intention. But what you said must have been too overwhelming for her, as she placed one of her hands over her lips shamefully.

She looked so bashful.

Her rosy cheeks flaring with embarrassment as she covered her mouth with her hand.

“…Can I touch them for you?”

You asked it in a hushed tone. “I promise that I will be gentle. And if I do something that you don’t like then you’re more than strong enough to stop me.”

You smiled as you said that last part. It was true. Mahito was incredibly strong, even in this female form. She had merely changed the shape of her body to be female presenting, all of the power still remained. It actually turned you on even more to think that someone so feminine looking could be so strong.

Mahito giggled at that.

“Oh…I definitely am,” she said. “I’m so strong that I could kill someone if they looked at you the wrong way.”

She gave you a smile, as if she had just said something very romantic.

You blinked at her in disbelief.

You really weren’t expecting that kind of response from this seemingly shy and sweet girl. She looked so innocent as she spoke about potential murder. And she was acting incredibly possessive. Apparently that wasn’t going to end just because Mahito had switched genders.

…It was so fucking hot.

You were actually concerned by how aroused you had become. You could feel your slick coating your inner thighs, but you chose to ignore it. You would have your fun later. Perhaps by using Mahito’s pretty little mouth.

But for now…

You licked your lips as you stared down at Mahito’s exposed chest.

“Yes. You’re a strong girl, Mahi,” you agreed. You found that the nickname suited Mahito even more now that she was female presenting. ‘Mahi’ sounded cuter.

You reached forward, smirking as you took one of her nipples between two fingers. You rolled the sensitive bud carefully, not applying too much pressure. It went erect right before your eyes.

“Do you think you can stay strong and endure this for me?”

You hadn’t felt dominant like this in a very long time. It was actually shocking how steady your own voice sounded as you spoke. The curse mark usually triggered your submissive mindset. But you were beginning to suspect that it would trigger whichever mindset would best fit Mahito’s needs in the moment. That by itself turned you on beyond belief.

Mahito flushed even more. You were almost concerned by how much she was blushing. She didn’t reply to your question at all, instead allowing a cute noise to escape her lips.

“Mh-“

She squeezed her eyes shut, still hiding her mouth with her hand. She looked so shy. Her other hand was gripping your forearm as you continued to tease her nipple.

“How does it feel..? Tell me.”

You weren’t sure how well Mahito would respond to receiving an order. You kind of wanted to test your luck with this and see just how far you could get.

Mahito shook her head, her fingernails digging into the skin of your arm.

“It’s so much more…S-sensitive in a female body,” she explained. Her voice was so soft and hesitant.

You exhaled deeply at that. You wanted to fuck her face so badly, but you kept reminding yourself that there would be time for that later. You began teasing her other nipple as well, rolling them simultaneously.

“y/n,” Mahito whispered.

You furrowed your brows together at the sound of your own name leaving her lips. She sounded so hot and bothered by this. You were beginning to grow impatient, spreading your fingers to grope her breasts entirely. You squeezed them. Fuck, they felt so nige beneath your touch. You were addicted to the feeling.

“Why is it so…sensitive? Please explain,” Mahito begged.

You had never seen Mahi like this before. Begging for an explanation from you. Usually he was so sure of his superior intelligence that he never bothered to ask you for information. That was different now. Female Mahito apparently wanted to seek your guidance in this. You were more than happy to oblige.

You leaned in close, taking Mahito’s earlobe into your mouth. You pulled on it gently with your teeth before whispering.

“Because you’re so aroused, Mahi. I’m making you feel good.”

You slid one of your legs in between her thighs, being sure to press against her core as you loomed over her.

Mahito tilted her head back against the pillow, a muffled whimper ripped from her throat from the pressure of your leg against her clit.

“T-the ten thousand nerve endings,” Mahito gasped.

You held back a laugh, instead smiling down at her blushing face. Of course Mahito would still maintain the same scientific outlook on all this. Some things just wouldn’t change regardless of the gender.

“Yeah…It’s intense, right?”

You pressed your thigh against her core again.

Mahito tensed up, squeezing your thigh with her legs powerfully. She even gave a cute little thrust against you.

“Someone wants attention on her clit, hm?”

You teased hotly beside her ear.

Mahito gasped again.

“Y-yes, I’m curious!” She began defensively.

Her voice was so goddamn cute. It made you feral. You began pressing some sweet kisses against her neck, biting occasionally. Mahito whined beneath you, her hands gripping your shoulders. You had never heard a whine like that come out of your lover before, it made your mind start to go a little crazy.

“God,” you whispered. “You’re way better than any other woman I’ve ever been with.”

You didn’t know why you chose to say that. It just felt right to let her know. You were obsessed with her. You were taking your time, but all that you could think was how badly you wanted to make her come.

Mahito scoffed stubbornly. She wrapped her legs around your waist, pushing up against you.

“I don’t want you to be with any other girls,” she hissed. “You’re mine.”

Her possessiveness was meant to be intimidating, but it sounded so cute in her feminine voice. You knew that she was serious. She could actually fight off another girl if she had to. The combination of possessive and submissive was so unique and adorable. Not to mention it was quite rare. You had never experienced it with anyone else before.

Mahito had her face buried against your neck as she clung onto you. She was scowling, her brows knit together in anger. Just the thought of another girl being under you made her blood boil. She was fantasizing about all the ways she would kill her competition. You weren’t aware of it, but Mahito was more than capable of murder. She had killed people for way less.

She kissed your curse mark.

“My human,” she muttered.

If she ever caught another girl hitting on you then she would start plotting immediately. Mahito knew that you would never cheat, but she didn’t want another girl to touch you. She was tempted to cover every inch of your skin with more curse marks. That way no one would be able to think that you were single.

Mahito whined again. She didn’t know where this submissive mindset came from. She had never felt this way in her entire life. But her pussy felt so empty. That was an entirely new sensation. She thrusted up against your waist to get your attention where she needed it most.

“M-my clitoris…It’s hard.”

Mahito knew that she used the scientific term, but she didn’t care. She could hardly think straight. That tiny bundle of nerves wanted friction so bad. She wanted to touch it, but she wouldn’t dare to do that on her own when she could have you instead.

She grinned to herself.

“I can sense your arousal,” she said. “Come on…Give me what I want!”

Your hands tightened against Mahito’s slim waist.

Fuck.

Why was she so cute when she got all demanding and whiny?? You were quickly losing yourself in the moment, but you snapped back to reality.

“Of course, Mahi… I’ll give you exactly what you need.”

You pawed at her breasts again, this time squeezing them more harshly and pressing them together. You loved how soft they were.

“Do you remember when you touched my breasts for the first time? What did you call them, again? …Jugs?”

You chuckled at her reaction to your words.

Mahito gave you a stubborn glare.

“F-fuck me,” she demanded. “No more talking.”

Damn, she was bold. You were almost surprised by how she spoke to you. You cleared your throat in an effort to compose yourself. You didn’t say anything, you simply began to trail kisses down Mahito’s bare torso. You pulled at her loose pants and took them off completely.

The sight of her wet pussy nearly gave you a heart attack.

Your lips parted as you stared at it.

It was so pretty. You couldn’t control yourself any longer.

“Hurry,” Mahito warned.

But you didn’t need the warning. You practically dived in between her thighs, spreading them as you focused in on her pussy. Your lips made contact with it instantly. You pressed an open mouthed kiss right against her clit, your saliva was sloppy and hot as you made out with it.

Her folds felt so smooth and creamy from how aroused she was. You were in heaven as you ate her out.

Mahito whined again. She bucked her hips up against your face from the sensations.

“T-that’s my clit…Right?”

She moaned during the sentence.

“Mhm,” you hummed.

You poked out your tongue next, swirling it around the bud carefully. You didn’t want to do anything too intense just yet. It was important to introduce everything gradually so that Mahi could get used to the different feelings.

She buried her fingers into your hair, bringing your face closer as she hesitantly thrusted against it.

“Ngh…so good,” she whimpered. She sounded like she was in a daze. You stared up at her.

Mahito’s hair was coming loose from the braid. The baby hairs began to frame her face in such an adorable way. And her expression was so fucking cute. She looked so aroused by all this.

You closed your eyes, focusing as you began to prod her entrance with a single finger. Her slit already felt so tight just from stroking it. Wait…That’s right. Mahito technically has a virgin pussy. Your face flushed from the idea.

She had likely never felt penetration before.

“What do you want me to do, baby?”

You asked carefully. You honestly weren’t sure how far she wanted to go. She said something about wanting to get fucked earlier but you couldn’t tell if she was serious about penetration.

Mahito was blushing so much as she stared down at you with her different colored eyes.

“…I don’t want to feel empty anymore,” she said.

Hm. You knew that feeling all too well. You would be cruel to deny her in such a state. You nodded, glancing down to watch as you slid your middle finger inside. You did it slowly, making sure that she could feel every inch. She was so warm and slick inside…

“So fucking wet,” you whispered.

You pressed a kiss against her clit which made her clench around you instantly.

You chuckled at her again. Mahito was so skittish like this. You could feel how her thigh muscles would tighten and relax. She clearly wanted to come soon. You wanted to help her get there.

You slid all the way into the knuckle, tilting upwards into her G-spot.

“Ha,” Mahito moaned.

She still felt so tight. You were actually afraid to move your finger too much. But she was so wet that it shouldn’t be able to cause any pain. You began to flick your finger back and forth inside of her, teasing that special spot. The resistance from her inner walls was quite strong around your finger. She kept squeezing you. If you had a dick then it would probably feel otherworldly.

“That’s it,” you praised. “Let me in.”

You began to add a second finger. It was difficult, but Mahito was smart enough to try and relax around the intrusion. She even spread her legs wider to get more inside.

“Mm-“

She sounded so desperate as she kept making soft little noises. She gasped once you had two fingers inside, finger fucking her quickly all of a sudden.

“A-ah! y/n!”

Mahi was loud.

You briefly wondered if maybe someone else in the mansion would hear. You certainly hoped not. You only wanted these noises to be heard by you, no one else. You remained focused, sliding your fingers in and out, tilting them upward into that spot of hers. It felt swollen and angry inside, ready to come but not enough to push her over the edge.

“Remember what I said about clit stimulation?” You asked sweetly. “You used to deny my clit all the time. Now do you see how frustrating that is?”

You just couldn’t help yourself. You wanted to get a bit of revenge with Mahito. Whenever he was male representing, he had a tendency to mock your needy little clit or even deny it all together. You could feel a tinge of pride swelling in your chest. Oh, yes. You were giving him a taste of his own medicine now. And you even got to play with Mahito’s cute female body at the same time. This was like your bisexual dream.

You thrusted into Mahi’s cute pussy with your fingers some more, relishing the way that her tight walls clung onto you.

“Who’s the fleshlight now, hm?”

You teased her ruthlessly.

“I bet you love this feeling. Clenching around me so much.”

You completely ignored her clit, instead continuing to finger her and hit that same spot over and over again.

Mahito giggled, sounding out of breath.

“Fine! I’ll just…Turn you into a dildo then…haha!”

She ruffled your hair fondly.

You couldn’t help but laugh with her. That truly was a creative comeback, you were surprised that she could even think much during all this. She seemed to be in a faraway place mentally.

You had always been a bit of a softie when it came to women, Mahito in particular. You just couldn’t deny her pretty clit any longer. Not when it looked so needy and neglected.

You leaned forward and began to suck on it gently.

“Yes,” Mahi murmured.

You loved how helpless she sounded, completely at your mercy. Mahi thrusted against your face, riding your fingers and your tongue at the same time. She just couldn’t get enough, and you were more than happy to lap up all of her juices.

Her slick was coating your chin and your lips. You wore it like a goddamn badge of honor. You were absolutely drunk off her pussy. You could go at it for hours even if you ended up getting exhausted eventually.

“Ha..Ha! Right there, yes-“

Mahi cried pathetically as she thrusted against you. She was completely abusing your face but you didn’t care at all.

Mahi squeaked when her orgasm hit her. She made so many meek sounds, it really drove you insane to listen to it all. You had to contain yourself.

You removed your fingers carefully, the slick covering your fingers. You licked it clean. Mahi tasted perfect. It was a bit different from Mahito’s semen, but that was to be expected.

Mahi breathed harshly as she laid there. She took only a moment to gather herself before she sat upright in the bed.

You stared at her in disbelief. Holy shit. Curse stamina really was something else entirely.

She grinned at you, leaning forward to latch onto your curse mark on your shoulder. She licked it and sucked at it possessively.

“Mine,” she said stubbornly. “Mine, mine, mine.”

You couldn’t help but laugh at her silly behavior.

“Yeah, yeah. All yours,” you replied with a warm smile.

Mahi looked so beautiful sitting there in her naked female body. Like an angel who fell from heaven. Or a demon who crawled up from hell. It changed depending on her mood.

You were happy that you had managed to satisfy her, but you were left with an achy feeling in your core. You needed to come. It honestly wouldn’t take much, either.

Mahi glanced down at her own breasts and squeezed them experimentally.

“…I like it better when I touch yours,” she said.

You blushed from her words and the sight of her touching her own breasts. God, you were such a pervert. For some reason you were starting to imagine what she would look like in the shower, with her chest covered with soap and water. How slippery her breasts would feel in your hands.

Mahi stared at you blankly.

“…You’re drooling.”

She said it so simply, just stating a fact.

“Shit, sorry!” You said suddenly. You wiped your mouth with the back of your hand. Fuck that was mortifying.

“…I want to try something,” Mahito said.

She sounded like she was in deep thought.

“Since the clitoris has over 10,000 nerve endings…And the penis only has 4,000…”

She stared down at her own pussy as if to think some more about her idea. She swallowed the lump in her throat before she looked up at you again.

“I want to transfigure my clitoris into a larger phallic shape. That way I can fuck you with it, and I’m really curious how it would feel for me.”

Mahi gave you a determined look. She kept a steady tone as she said all of that. Meanwhile, your eyebrows nearly shot into your hairline.

“H-huh?!”

You didn’t care how stupid your reply sounded. You were fucking baffled. Flabbergasted. Dumbfounded. You almost forgot that Mahito had the ability to transfigure herself. The possibilities were endless. Your cheeks started to grow red from the thought of that. Hearing Mahi’s cute girl moans as she fucked you. You were about to come in your pants right then and there.

“…Immediately yes,” you said finally. “Let’s do it.”

She giggled at your reaction.

“So eager,” she teased.

You could only nod your head enthusiastically, already taking your clothes off in a hurry. You tossed them to the side without a care in the world. This was going to be fucking amazing. You couldn’t even dream of something like this. Being in a relationship with a powerful demon certainly did have its perks.

You laid down on the bed, planting your head against the pillows as Mahi towered over you. She closed her eyes as she began to transfigure herself. You glanced down to watch.

It didn’t look like a normal penis. It looked like some kind of organ, with soft skin and slick coating it all over. It was actually an arousing sight. You wanted it inside of you so badly. The slight curve at the tip would feel great against your G-spot, you could already tell. And it had a nice looking girth to it as well. Your pussy was already clenching around nothing just from looking at it for so long.

Mahi gripped it to aim towards your entrance, but she immediately yelped.

“You okay?” You asked hurriedly.

Mahi sucked in a sharp breath as he grabbed it gentler.

“Just very sensitive,” she said. “Now…Are you gonna take my clit like a good girl?”

Her feminine voice saying something dirty like that really made your body have a reaction. You nodded again.

“Y-yes,” you whispered. “I will.”

You were already spreading your thighs for her like some kind of whore. Mahi’s face was so pretty. She had soft features and a light blush still. She sighed as she lined up with your slit, rubbing against it.

“I might not last long,” she warned.

You breathed through your lips.

“It’s okay, me neither.”

Your eyes trailed over her body. Her plump breasts, perky nipples, soft stomach. And her raging clit erection. It was such an arousing sight. But you didn’t have nearly enough time to enjoy it properly.

Mahi slid inside.

She didn’t go slow. She rushed into your pussy and immediately began panting desperately.

“Oh fuck! F-fuck, fuck…”

She cried out. It almost sounded like she was in pain, but there was pleasure in her tone as well.

“So hot, fleshlight…Burning me-“

Mahi couldn’t handle it. She thrusted into you, if anything just to get some relief from your heat. You gasped from the sensations, feeling the hardness of her clit rubbing inside of you. You had never heard Mahito react this way when he was male presenting. He rarely ever cursed.

You closed your eyes, moaning softly from the sensations. Meanwhile, Mahi couldn’t shut up no matter how hard she tried to.

“Good girl! Such a good girl… Do you have…ha.. Any idea how tight you are?”

Mahi thrusted her clit into you over and over again, rambling nonsense and praise with her feminine voice. She wouldn’t stop fucking you into the bed. You glanced up at her, reaching forward to grab her tits as she fucked you. You rolled her nipples between your fingers teasingly.

Mahi’s eyes actually rolled into the back of her head as she squeezed her eyes shut.

“Yes…Ha…Geh-“ she rambled gibberish.

She actually sounded like she was completely gone mentally. That had never happened before.

“Mahi-“ you moaned.

Your hand flew down to your clit. You started to rub tight circles against it, suddenly jealous of the pleasure that your partner was experiencing. Something told you that if Mahi was a human, she would have came ages ago from something as intense as this. But she was a cursed spirit. Therefore she had way more stamina.

You moaned under your breath, working your clit faster as you attempted to focus. You could feel yourself getting closer to the edge just from the lewd sight of Mahi fucking you with her breasts flopping around freely. You groaned as she hit that spot inside of you, expertly massaging your inner walls.

“Ngh…Fuck-“ you gasped.

You spasmed and pulsed as you came around her clit. You surprised yourself by how fast you were, but you were extremely worked up from all this tension.

“Ch-“ Mahito rasped. She groaned loudly as she came inside of you.

“Pulsing…can’t take it when you do that!” She exclaimed out of frustration. She made so many lewd and strangely submissive sounds as she fucked into you, riding out her orgasm. She was quick to collapse against your chest afterward, returning her clit back to its normal size.

You breathed heavily, sliding your hand down her smooth back in an effort to comfort her.

“How are you feeling?” You somehow managed to ask.

You traced lazy patterns against her sweaty skin.

Mahi had her face pressed against your neck as she laid on top of you. There was no response from her.

“…Mahito?”

You patted her back gently.

Then you started to hear…

Snoring?

Your eyes widened with shock. Cursed spirits don’t need to sleep. Using her clit as a penis must have been so intense that it actually made Mahito lose consciousness. You hoped that everything was fine. It should be. After all, Mahito was a special grade curse. Something like having sex with a human shouldn’t harm her at all.

You sighed as you pet Mahi’s hair.

Maybe spending a lot of time in the mansion wasn’t so bad.

Read more Mahito here

[elliemarchetti]

Gwynriel Weeks Day 6

For this day of @gwynrielweeksofficial I would like to propose, in addition to a subversion of the usually male-driven realization of the mating bond, also a possible friendship between Gwyn and Elain. I hate when authors pit women against each other for the sake of a man, and both characters, who I find could get along extremely well, are very dear to me, so I hope you could enjoy reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it (on company time, so please don’t be mad if you find some mistakes).

Prompt: Mates

Words: 1021

Gwyn had never been very interested in the concept of mates before meeting Elain. Nesta's younger sister, but not the youngest of the Archerons, had the High Lord himself take her to the library to find out more about what could happen in case she decided to reject the bond tethering her to Lucien Vanserra and stayed at the House for a few nights, waking up early in the morning and going to bed late at night, her lovely button nose buried in the pages and her back bent over countless books. At first, Gwyn hadn’t approached her. Something had happened between the lady and Azriel, and although she had no right to be jealous, she had felt a note of annoyance at the idea. She had felt guilty, because the priestesses had taught her not to be possessive, and childish, since Azriel didn’t look at her like that, but in the end curiosity and kindness had won, and when Elain had asked her for help, they ended up chatting. She was different from how she had imagined her, not a warrior in the physical sense of the word, but a resilient creature, still torn between her mortal and Fae selves.

“I shouldn’t bore you with this nonsense,” she told her one afternoon, over a cup of hot tea. But Gwyn wasn’t bored, on the contrary, the more she listened, the more she understood about herself too. She had suffered a little when she saw her leave, declaring that her mind was clearer but she still needed to think before deciding, but she soon rejoiced when she saw her return, a basket full of apple and cinnamon biscuits, which she had told her were her favourites.

“I’ve realized I can’t choose if I don’t leave the Night Court’s comfort zone. Here every time I meet him I’m monitored, with Rhysand and Feyre watching my every move and Nesta and Azriel ready to slit his throat at the slightest hint of discomfort on my part. They don’t seem to understand ours isn’t a normal bond, and before establishing a relationship there will be moments of sadness to face together, embarrassing conversations that will have to be had in order to figure out if we want to continue in that direction, and maybe some mistakes will be necessary too to make things right,” she had said once they were alone.

“So you mean to leave?” Gwyn had asked, and unexpectedly she felt her heart tighten in her chest at the idea of losing her.

“Not permanently,” her new friend had replied, “and whenever I will return, I will come here to tell you about my travels and ask if you would like to join us. Rhysand would be thrilled to know that in addition to two emissaries, one of his spies would have free access to all Courts.”

Gwyn had blushed at that implication, she was still in the midst of her training and no one should know about it, but Elain had mentioned it so casually she had probably seen her succeed in one of her visions. They had never talked much about her powers, except when she told her she had seen images of her and her mate together, making her not particularly surprised when, on the third or fourth visit, she announced with a beaming expression that she had accepted the bond.

“I prepared a great dinner, and forced him to eat everything like a civilized being before approaching me,” she had told her, and they had laughed at the matter, exchanging the recipes mentioned and whispering like little girls who feared being caught discussing something forbidden when the details of the frenzy became obscener. Gwyn had never spoken that way to Emerie and Nesta, who knew what had happened to her in Sangravah, but she still found it refreshing, and it helped her delve into some of the more suggestive reading that her friends had never recommended to her. Not that she didn’t talk with Nesta about her relationship with Cassian, but the Lord of Bloodshed and her fellow Valkyrie were more tumultuous, caught up in constant bickering that ended in wild, noisy sex. It was a different bond, because they were different people than Elain and Lucien, all properness and secrecy, but they made her curious about other mated couples. The most obvious was the relationship between the High Lord and Lady, a connection based on sharing: he was part of her, they spoke telepathically, they flew together with those special wings only they possessed and they had a death pact, to go down the road to death at the same time. A little codependent, for Gwyn’s taste, but after all it wasn’t up to her to judge, since she didn’t have a mate of her own.

Obviously, like any girl, she had thought about the characteristics she would like her Cauldron chosen to have. A strong male but capable of infinite sweetness, who knew how to work with his hands and at the same time caress her as if she was the most fragile creature in the world. An intelligent Fae incapable of presumption, who listened to her talk endlessly about the things she had learned and in turn had something to teach her. She would’ve liked them to have shared interests, and she had revelled in the idea he was someone who didn’t constantly need external reassurance, someone who saw her and her truth as enough, but it was only a daydream, qualities she could’ve found in anyone and not necessary a mate, although every now and then the idea of belonging to someone who could understand her soul, she who had no certain roots and who had lost her entire family, intrigued her. But it was just a game, definitely not something she expected to find far from Prythian, in an unknown village, in the middle of a dangerous mission, in the form of the only non-foreign person within miles. A wave of panic washed over her at the overwhelming realization that Azriel Shadowsinger was her mate, and under no circumstances should he find out.

[paris-in-space]

I need to get the thoughts I’m having about Doctor who out because if they just stay circulating my head I don’t know if I’ll be able to get to sleep it’s been 2 hours and I’m tired but my brain is refusing to shut down.

So, Dot and Bubble spoilers beware. Also these thoughts will be in the order I think of putting them down not in the chronology of the episode.

Weird place to start but one thing I got caught up on was the style of makeup that the majority of finetime characters had, like it was heavy and unflattering but in a way that seemed like maybe they were trying to go for a more natural look. And I’m sure there is something to be taken from this about the way people present themselves online but I’m too tired to do proper analysis it just struck me early on that I didn’t like the makeup. (It did feel fitting though)

I literally went “OH SHES BEING RACIST” out loud at the end. I do admit that although I did notice the weird vibes in Lindy’s responses to the doctor I didn’t pick up the exact meaning until that last scene, but then so many things clicked into place and made sense once I understood that fully. Like when she responded badly to the doctor appearing on the screen a second time I took it as irritation at his persistence, didn’t even think for a second that she didn’t realise it was the same guy.

Lindy deserves to get eaten by a slug.

Ricky September you deserve so much better.

(Not going to lie I didn’t think he was as attractive as everyone was making him out to be no offence to the actor I think it was a case of the weird makeup strikes again)

The lack of human connection is another thing that really stood out. This is the second episode this series to feature the concept of people never being hugged, albeit in different contexts. Just everyone being so focused in on themselves that basic human connection isn’t present in their society is such a sad thought, no wonder it turns out people like Lindy with no value for the lives of others and understanding of cultural differences if she has no meaningful relationships in her life at all. Just. Hug your friends guys (as long as they’re comfortable with it I know some people struggle with being touched)

The Doctor failing is such a rare thing, like of course there are tons of occasions where the Doctor can’t save everyone but they always try and almost always save at least someone. But these people cannot be saved, and it’s not the slugs that they can’t be saved from, it’s themselves. I think the lack of explanation into the detail of what actually was going on ties into this, because this time the Doctor doesn’t get to do a little “Here’s what’s been going down I saved you look how clever I am!” Because even the Doctor, the most caring wonderful being in the universe can’t save people who refuse to change and accept his help just because he’s different. The unfinished downer feeling feels totally intentional. Like, these people suck, the Doctor doesn’t get to experience a conclusive win, so neither do we as the audience.

The fact that this episode took place in the future too, they really said, just because time passes and things look like they’ve developed, societal issues have not disappeared and are still prevalent (I am white just so you know that’s the perspective I’m coming from) I think it’s a much more powerful way to address racism by putting it in a future setting than in the past. It’s very easy with historical settings to look at a piece of media and be like okay so the racism is awful but that is how it was, it’s uncomfortable but we can sort of look around it because everyone was doing it back then. But you put it in the future and you can’t look around it anymore because it should not be happening, should no longer be culturally acceptable. I’m struggling to put into words exactly what I mean, but it’s the difference between oh times were different back then it sucks but that’s how it was and times are not that different there’s still a massive issue to address here we can’t just sweep it under the rug of the past if we actually want things to be fair for everybody. It definitely made me think a lot more than a similar situation in a historical setting probably would have (not that that wouldn’t make me think but this has more impact)

On a more lighthearted note, the Dot flying around reminded me of the baubles from Runaway Bride. This is Doctor Who you cannot escape the floating balls.

Ruby doing the hair tuck seeing Ricky… she’s so real for that.

Overall I really love the concept of everyone so caught up in their own little world that they fail to see the horrors right before them. And it all comes back to the importance of human connection and understanding.

This has got to be the most thought provoking episode in a long time, and I’m sure there’s more thoughts I’ve had that I’ve forgotten to mention here.

[urgonnaneedabiggership]

Credits of this glorious GIF go to @meideixx

Namor (MCU) X Mexican!OC

Part II Here

Part III Here

MASTERLIST

Synopsis:

War photographer Sadie Medina is one day mysteriously whisked away on a mission that is suspiciously secret for a botanical expedition. A tragic twist of the events leads to her getting too close to something she should've never found, and too close to people who, by all odds, was never supposed to meet, be imprisoned by, and much less grow close to.

Word count: 2,250

Warnings: MCU typical violence, mentions of war, mentions of death and un-living people, Namor is the charming asshole we all love.

A/N: So, yeah, I've got it bad for this man and I have a ton of unused knowledge of Mayan culture due to me being a sucker for my country's history and some research I did for a Hellboy fanfic that never saw the light, so when he showed up on my screen I saw THE chance and I'm not about to let it go to waste, so here's the first chapter of this slow-burn-wannabe-enemies-to-okyou'recool-to-lovers.

P.S. Before you say anything, the OC's name makes sense a bit further down the road, I promise!

*Disclaimer: I'm by no means an expert on Mayan, but I did my best (by this I mean I looked for the best translator possible) and sorry for any mistakes. Handy little translations at the end, if needed.

There’s little room for anything else in your brain when you’re on the brink of death.

Sadie could talk from experience. And while she had convinced herself that survival instincts are incredibly selfish, the guilt trips and bad dreams would always be the painful aftershock of her line of work. People would often comment on how she must genuinely love what she did or she wouldn’t put her life on the line constantly, but it never really felt like love to her. It was more like a duty. A demanding, consuming, but necessary duty.

She’d heard the soldiers she often found herself around mention that same concept. Yet, after many years, she still couldn’t comprehend how people did many terrible things in the name of the only thing that made her decide to pour her heart into war photography for the remainder of her life.

Her father had never understood it either. She specifically remembered an exchange they had when she was about six, during one scorching afternoon, while she sat on his knees and played with an old rag doll. Guerrilleros didn’t precisely get a stable paycheck at the end of the month.

“This is stupid,” she’d said, tugging at the doll’s arms.

“What is?” asked her father, his voice soft but never tearing his eyes from his surroundings.

“I want to go home. I don’t want to be here. I want to live in our old house, with my Abue. This is stupid.” He had said nothing.

“Pa?” she asked meekly after a short pause. “Are you going to go away like Tío Ramiro? I don’t want to wear the ugly black dress that my aunt did after he went away.”

He couldn’t help but smile a little at her, pulling the girl closer and embracing her against his chest.

“I wouldn’t want that, muñequita. But it’s not up to me. Do you know how I’m always telling you to do as your Abue or I say? Well, there are some people I must obey too.”

“But they tell you to do...ugly things. They make you fight other people; Ernesto told me so. He says you go and beat them so bad they can’t get up. And Abue said that hitting people isn’t nice."

A long sigh that seemed to leave his lungs empty left the man’s mouth. A curse escaped his lips. He had to be more careful about letting her be around the camp’s eldest children. Hell, Ernesto was barely even a child. He could be standing guard in no more than six months with a weapon in his hands.

“Can’t you just talk to them? Maybe you can get along, and we can go back home.”

“It’s more complicated like that,” he replied, almost painfully. He sounded very, very tired. Sadie had discovered at an early age that when grown-ups didn’t really understand something, they’d say it was “complicated.”

“Some people are not that good at listening, preciosa.”

 

He was right. And so she didn’t tell. She showed.

And she had never been shy at admitting she was awful good at it.

The unexpectedness of her line of work amused, thrilled, and scared her a little bit. One day she could be in nearly arctic territories documenting the kidnapping of a crew of whale hunters by a faction of extremist ecologists, the next, she could be aboard a plane going God knows where after two men with three-letter badges insisted she was required for a “task of great scientific relevance.”

Sadie wasn’t particularly trustful of men with badges, but the sight of poorly concealed guns was one hell of a way to make someone change their mind.

And now she was sitting in a suffocatingly hot briefing room on an island in the middle of nowhere, surrounded by people who owned either a badge, a Ph.D., or both.

“…it’s crucial that you carry the vial at all times and be extremely careful. There’s more fungus than antidote, and it will take at least another month to synthesize more. Am I clear?” indicated a man with such small eyes that one could barely see the white in them. The way his lips tugged at his mouth downwards asymmetrically didn’t help much. All she knew was that he was the leader of this “expedition,” and his last name was something like Baxter or Dexter.

Rocks. She had left behind a great fucking story for a trip to photograph submarine rocks.

“Is something still unclear to you, Ms. Medina?” asked the captain after everyone had left the room but her.

“Yes, I think so…” she replied. Captain Baxter? Captain Dexter? “I think so, sir. I’m not sure about my role in all of this.”

“Ms. Medina, I can assure you’re entirely qualified for….”

“Sir, I know I am,” Sadie replied, perhaps a bit too bluntly. Overqualified, she would’ve wanted to add. “What I mean is, there are many colleagues of mine with excellent credentials who would jump at the chance to snap a picture of algae.”

“Really? Do you happen to know many wildlife photographers with military training, survivalist knowledge, and crisis management experience?” he retorted. This man’s attempts to be funny or sarcastic still sounded like a threat.

“Maybe, who knows? Still, why would you need…?”

“Ms. Medina, let me tell you something off the record. I don’t give a rat’s ass about those qualifications.”

While she did not appreciate being interrupted like that, there were words like “off the record” that piqued her interest.

“We’ve researched you thoroughly,” the captain continued emphatically, “and what was most impressive to us wasn’t your ability to constantly get in trouble, but your ability to each and every time find your way out. You’ve come out alive in situations you shouldn’t have been able to. That is why you’re here and not some Nat Geo intern.”

At this point, her instincts began telling her something was off. They weren’t telling her everything. Something about that speech the captain had just given her felt off-putting, but before she could try and dig for some more information, the man went around her.

“Trust me, this mission is worth your time.” Was the last thing he said before exiting the room, coming across a young soldier who saluted him.

“Captain Wexler, we are ready for departure as scheduled, sir.”

A speaker announcing the departure of the first raft caught her attention. 

“Wexler, then.” Sadie affirmed, leaving hastily for the main deck.

Only five people, including herself, left the ship in the raft. She noticed they were headed toward a large formation of rocks that was barely visible from their distance. As they drifted closer, she looked in awe at the porous, black surface of the structure that grew larger by the second until it towered at about fifty feet above their heads.

“It’s an entrance,” explained one of the two scientists on board, leaning closer to her. “See, it looks like it’s just rocks, but once we dive and get to the center, you’ll see it leads to a very complex cave system.”

Honestly, the idea of a virtually impossible-to-escape underwater cave system wasn’t appealing to Sadie. Yet, the several things she had found out to feel out of place had captured her interest. She was almost sure there was something else to all of this that they didn’t want her to know. Or anyone else, for that matter. The entrance was so small that two people, shoulder to shoulder, wouldn’t have been able to fit inside. They had to go in a single line: one soldier in front, the two scientists, Sadie in fourth, and another soldier behind her. It was impressive how well the rocks hid the entrance. They almost looked like the black petals of a flower that would close around them at any given moment. In less than fifteen minutes, there was no trace of sunlight. They could only go forward with the guidance of their hands, lamps, and directions from the surface via intercom. 

“In thirty-five feet, you’ll find yourselves at Point Alpha.”

Point Alpha, as shown in the map they had reviewed during the presentation, was an underwater cave with a pocket of air that made it possible for them to emerge and breathe normally while harvesting samples. However, they were strictly ordered to stay together under all circumstances.

Sadie felt odd photographing something so out of her usual field. Something that wouldn’t go anywhere and wasn’t trying to kill her.

Well, not exactly. One of the samples that had to be collected was a saucer-shaped fungus that thrived in the humidity between the rocks. However, if removed incorrectly, the spores could suppress the flow of oxygen in the bloodstream, eventually causing hypoxia and death in a little over five minutes. That was what the vial of antidote was for.

After moving forwards for about half an hour, the space started to become smaller and smaller until the only thing left before them was a breach in the wall. And there was light coming from it.

“Sunlight? I thought we were already a hundred feet below the surface.”

“No. Bioluminescent microorganisms.” Bluntly stated the other soldier. “And this, Ms. Medina, is your time to shine. Here, take this.”

He handed her a tiny square, barely bigger than her hand and only two inches wide, wrapped in a thin leather case. She took it and examined it, carefully placing the strap around her neck.

“A high-definition camera. State of the art. What we need is for you to get in there. Our 3D mappings show that about 400 meters in, it will become wide enough for you to move and take pictures of what’s in there. Take as many as you need until you’re sure you’ve covered every possible angle, and when you’re ready, let us know. We’re on channel three.” The soldier handed her a climbing rope and instructed her to secure it around her waist.

Sadie stared at the crawlspace, mentally measuring it before taking off the belt with what was left of the gear they’d given her, leaving her with just the neoprene suit. She was about to get in before changing her mind and removing the camera’s strap, wrapping the vial of antidote with its tiny injector, and tying it to her wrist. Taking a deep breath, Sadie knelt down and awkwardly dragged herself forward. She could barely fit. And still, she could feel the pointy edges of the rocks digging into her flesh, protected only by the thin suit.

The closer she was, the brighter the light shone until it was strong enough to light up the entire cavity. Finally, she reached the broader space they mentioned.

It was a beautiful grotto, just around five feet wide, full of stalactites of twisted shapes that fell from the ceiling like petrified chandeliers. However, the light wasn’t coming from them. It came from a structure in the middle of the space: a hollow mound of rock as tall as her knee. Sadie could only get on all fours if she wanted to reach it and avoid the stalactites. She peeked inside, realizing it led to a deep conduct that seemed to go on for miles and miles. With the absolute sound isolation the walls provided, water could be heard splashing at the end. Taking out the camera, she snapped her first picture of many. She captured the width and height of the rocky base, then another of the entire space for size comparison, including the stalactites that prevented her from moving further. For good measure, she tried doing a close-up of some familiar-looking fungus splotched along the walls. In about ten minutes, she was sure she had captured everything to see in the grotto.

“Well, then. I guess that’s all.” She said into the intercom, “It was beautiful, guys, but I can’t believe you made me drop a probable Pulitzer for this.”

With a breathless laugh, she dropped herself down again and began crawling backward.

“Guys? Do you hear me? I’m on my way back. Over” She repeated, hearing nothing but static. Of course, the intercom would fail. “It’s a bit harder to do this in reverse. Would you mind helping me out a bit, please? Over.” She insisted as her feet constantly got stuck in the rocks, softly tugging on the rope. Still no answer.  

“Yeah, well, fuck you too,” Sadie muttered when she finally felt her legs break free.

“Alright, I got the pictures, but I don’t think those were bioluminescent….” She stopped mid-sentence when she turned around to find the cave completely empty. There was nothing but the scattered remnants of the team’s scuba gear and the closed sample containers all over the floor. Sadie’s instincts went crazy again. Something was very wrong. She fought the urge to call out to someone, picked up one of the pocket knives, and advanced as quietly as possible, her heart thundering in her chest so heavily she could feel it in her throat.

Suddenly, a clinking sound made her flinch as a small blue prism fell on the trail a few meters ahead. She didn’t even have time to feel surprised before the entire cave filled with water in a matter of seconds, washing her away and slamming her against the same wall she’d just emerged from. Then, there was only darkness.

Darkness…and a language she hadn’t heard in a long, long time, since she was a little girl in the warm jungle of Chiapas.

[gloomiebearwritings]

Hi! I love your work and I was hoping you can make headcanons of the s/o coming out as demisexual to Kung Lao, Hanzo, Erron, Kaui, and Kabal?

Sorry, this took a bit! I somehow missed this one???? Hope these are to your liking! ❤❤❤❤

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Kung Lao

The concept was curious to him as he’d never heard of it before- but he’d hear you out on it so he could understand

Though truth be told he himself had thought about his own, wondering if he was really what he thought he was

When you were walking with him one day however, you mentioned wanting to talk about something important. While he was worried he knew he could trust that it wasn’t anything negative given how softly you spoke to him. Once you two had gotten far from everyone else and sitting with each other by a pond he asked what was wrong- concerned that perhaps he had messed up somewhere.

Though as you explained to him that it had nothing to do with him, but rather that you wanted him to know something about you he began to relax. The moment you told him you were demisexual a little light went off in his head as he realized a lot of the things you’d said before; a quiet little ‘oh’ leaving him before he smiled. He said he understood, and told you he’d never pressure you into anything, that he was thankful you trusted him enough to tell him this.

Hanzo

He always told you he loved you no matter what, no matter what changes occurred, or who you were- he’d always love you and be there for you

So even if sexuality never really crossed his mind his clan had always been open to everyone without question- something he reminds you of whenever he sees you became nervous

The night you chose to talk to him about yours he was seated next to you, softly humming. Though as soon as you mentioned wanting to talk he went silent, curious as to what was on your mind. As you explained to him that you were demisexual he seemed a little perplexed for a moment, though he did come to understand- giving a slow nod as you explained it. 

A part of him worried if he was still someone you were comfortable with, asking you if he’d ever made you uncomfortable in the past. When you tell him that you’ve never felt uncomfortable with him, he breathes a sigh of relief, thanking you for trusting him with this. In the end he’ll tell you how much it means to him that you feel comfortable enough to tell him.

Kuai Liang

He’d always made sure those in the Lin Kuei were accepted and allowed to freely express themselves

And though he was content with his own identity he was aware that things were different with you- but he never pressed you about it

So when you chose to talk to him about things he perked up a bit, asking if things were alright. After sitting him down you tell him that you were demisexual, his eyebrows raising for a moment before he gave a small nod and smile, saying he’d heard that others were the same. He tried to come off as supporting as he could, hoping he didn’t come off as assuming or rude.

He was happy that you trusted him so much though, feeling a small sense of pride in that he’d helped you feel comfortable enough to tell him something so personal. He promised you that he’d make sure no one spoke ill of you or tried to devalue any part of your identity.

Erron

He wasn’t a straight man, and he knew the ropes- though he was never the most open about it

And he’d always made a point to tell you he supports you no matter what, because he loves you so dearly

One night you chose to tell him while you two were on the back porch, enjoying the warm air, with him blissfully zoned out. However when you mentioned needing to tell him something he snapped back to reality, turning in his seat to look at you. He worried for a minute that perhaps you were done with him, or he did something wrong until you told him it was personal for you. 

He sat up straight as you told him how you felt, and what your identity was; he smiled softly and patted your knee, telling you he was glad you felt comfortable enough to tell him. Though he did ask if he ever made you uncomfortable, wondering if he’d ever pushed a button he shouldn’t have, only relaxing once you tell him he’d been just fine.

Kabal

He wasn’t straight in the slightest and could be a bit loud about it sometimes, always pushing back against the others who tried to start shit over it

While sometimes obnoxious he always settled down when around you, understanding you weren’t the most interested in intimacy in the early times of the relationship

Though when you came around to talking to him you waited until the two of you were alone at home, curled up on the couch. The two of you had settled down for a movie but found it boring, talking shit about the character’s stupid actions when you blurted out that you really wanted to tell him something. 

He listened carefully as you laid on top of him, gently stroking your shoulder, having paused the movie in order to hear you clearly. As you explained it to him, he quietly stared off at the ceiling, never speaking over you. Only after you were done explaining did he speak, telling you that it didn’t change the fact that he loved you to death before giving you a kiss on the top of your head. 

[outshinethestars]

Allegiances (Vorkosigan saga)

Sequel to Da

“What is it, Miles?” Uncle Simon said, and Miles sighed and gave up on pretending to work on his math homework, or even pretending he needed Uncle Simon to help him with his homework in the first place.

“It just doesn’t seem fair,” Miles said, letting out the pent up frustration “That Ivan gets all your attention now, just ‘cause you married his Ma.”

“I see,” Uncle Simon said, “Would facts be helpful to you in this moment?”

That was one of Mama’s questions.  She always made sure that Miles understood that no was a valid answer, although never a permanent one.  Because sometimes people just feel feelings, and sometimes it isn’t helpful to smash those feelings with Betan logic.

Uncle Simon was even worse than Mama, though.  Uncle Simon didn’t argue, he just provided you with raw data, so that it wasn’t even that he proved you wrong, you just were wrong.

“Sure, I guess,” Miles said.

“Well,” Uncle Simon said, “In the three months since I married Alys, I have spent a little over twenty three hours in your company, that’s approximately 3.57 hours more than the exact same span of time last year.”

Yeah.  Like that.

“Oh,” Miles said, “It’s not fair that you just know that sort of thing.”

“Perhaps not,” Uncle Simon said,  “But in light of this information, what are you really upset about?”

Miles thought about it.  He tried to be logical and objective while examining his feelings, as if he could quantify them and scrutinize them under a microscope, not ignoring them or getting caught up in them either, just the way Mama tried to teach him.  It wasn’t easy.

“I guess it doesn’t seem fair that Ivan gets to have everything .  He gets to have so much and I- I’m stuck like this.  I don’t know, I’m not making sense.”

“So, you think that because Ivan was born strong and healthy, he doesn’t deserve to have a father who loves and looks after him?” Uncle Simon said, calm and utterly ruthless.

“Well,” Miles said, “When you put it like that.”

“I know change is hard, Miles,” Uncle Simon says, “But this doesn’t really change anything.  I’ll still be here whenever you need me.”

“I know,” Miles said, and he did, really.  But he still felt certain that he had lost something in all of this, something real and significant, but frustratingly nebulous.

“The thing is,” Miles said slowly, “it’s your job to look after us, right?  And if Ivan and Gregor and me were all in danger and you could only save one of us, you’d save Gregor, obviously because he’s the emperor.  But before now, you would save me before Ivan, because you’re Da’s - because Da holds your loyalty.  But now, Ivan is your family, and that makes him your priority.”

“Ah,” Uncle Simon said, “I see, and I apologize, Miles.  I had not thought of it in that light, and you are quite correct.  Something has shifted, albeit something which is not practicably observable.”

“You’re not sorry you married Ivan’s ma, though, because you love her,” that was what Mama said, anyways.  Miles found the concept of Uncle Simon loving anyone hard to wrap his mind around, “So you’ve wanted to put Ivan first this whole time, you just haven’t because of duty.”

“You understand, don’t you,” Uncle Simon said, “That it isn’t a matter of caring for one of you over the other.  I care about both of you deeply.”

“I know,” Miles said.  It wasn’t about caring, or liking, or the word they were too Barrayarans to come out and say, loving.   It was about loyalty and chains of responsibility.  They were having a very frank and Betan sort of conversation about things that were fundamentally Barrayaran, so it stood to reason that things could get a little tangled.  “But you are Ivan’s Da.”

“I am.”

And Da meant more than Uncle ever would.

“I am sorry,” Uncle Simon said, “I don’t regret it, but I’m sorry I didn’t think.”

“It’s alright,” Miles said, and realized that it was.  Talking it out had helped, putting his finger on exactly what it was that had made him feel passed over and abandoned.  Having it all laid out in front of him like this, he realized he didn’t mind so much if Ivan got to have Uncle Simon as his own in a way that Miles didn’t.  “You’re right, about Ivan deserving to have a da.  I’ve got Da and Grandda, and Bothari and you, and all Ivan’s ever had is you, and of course you’ve always been busy with other things.  I never really thought about it before, but I guess it’s fair, if Ivan gets to have you all to himself, since you’re all he’s got.”

“I would hardly say that Ivan has me all to himself,” Uncle Simon said with one of those small smiles of his.

“True,” Miles said, brightening, “Twenty three hours, you said?  If I guilt trip you hard enough, d’you think we could make it to an even thirty?”

Uncle Simon laughed.

[vizthedatum]

I feel gross for being in love with my most recent ex-partner. I let a lot of things slide because I was smitten. I told them they were the best partner I had because I thought that the attention they gave me was the attention I wanted.

They didn’t seek to understand me, and when they were upset - they made accusatory “you” statements upon my character.

They also thought that my chronic illness’s effect of me getting tired or needing to change plans was an example of my actions not matching with my words (or “over promising but underdelivering”).

They did a lot for me but I thought they wanted to? I didn’t realize there was an emotional power play thing going on - and I don’t think they understood how I was trying to do stuff for them or show my love.

The first couple months of the relationship (before we became partners) were weird - it seemed like we had intense chemistry and feelings, but I also felt studied. And I also felt like I was just a fantasy to them - I didn’t meet their other partner until the day we became partners (we are poly). They told me they would have no hesitation being partners with me in late June (I remember because my ears started ringing, and there was a party in their backyard that day), they told me they loved me back in early July, and then in mid-July, they clarified saying they “weren’t in love with me.” I freaked out. It was so completely rude.

They played semantic games the whole time.

—

There were weird poly things that I didn’t really like or appreciate, and THE WHOLE POINT OF WHY I DO POLYAMORY IS SO WE CAN ALL BE HONEST WITH EACH OTHER. I would only find out about big poly things after the fact (like the method and timing of which they were going to get their best friend pregnant via unprotected sex and not during her ovulation period (wtf?!), the very valid health reason why they and their other partner were fluid bonded (which they broke with me - and to be frank, I don’t think they understand the health toll of how they perform sex with other people on the concept of fluid-bonding - I think they like to stay ignorant about a lot of things, and more).

And well, the disrespect with regards to my potential pregnancy (still awaiting ultrasound to confirm either way) was just the stupidest thing. It completely wore me down, and it was the penultimate breaking point of the relationship.

I was in agony, and they just kept emotionally invalidating me while saying they did everything right.

To top it off, their other partner suddenly changed the poly dynamic, I broke up with them, and they started telling people that my breakup with them was a “loss of their autonomy.” What?!

Before I blocked them, they lashed out at me with hateful messages - fully knowing that I could be pregnant (well they never thought/felt I was anyway - and this was confirmed) and I was having massive physical symptoms and I was scared of miscarrying. It didn’t matter to them. It didn’t matter to them that I have been through trauma or that I’ve been through lots of abusive partners and parents yelling at me - they did it anyway because they felt like they had a right to. I blocked them soon after.

—

Was I faultless? No, but I took accountability as much as I could - I tried to understand their point of view, while they really couldn’t for me.

—

After I told them I was blocking them and blocked them, they sent me random creepy calendar invites, messaged my girlfriend, and tried to offer “caretaking” if I would teach them violin.

Why the fuck would I want their caretaking if we weren’t partners AND if I didn’t want to be friends?

Yeah I’m disabled but I’m not desperate to get help by someone like that. Believe it or not, I’ve made it this far in life - and I’ve been able to manage, with or without help. Yes, I’ve had help from friends but that’s part of life.

—

Wtf was I thinking?

Why did I get so swept up?

I gave them a lot of benefit of the doubt. I praised them constantly.

I really loved them.

It’s not like I couldn’t get laid by someone else or date someone else.

I guess I thought they could step up.

I really really really CRAVED spending time with them - I think it was unhealthy. I think it was because of my previous trauma-wiring: I find emotionally unavailable people attractive.

—

I deserved a lot more respect. I deserved empathy. I deserved to be prioritized.

[russiandeathcup]

Suddenly I wanted to write about Arihnda. I came across some stupid post yesterday that I strongly disagreed with, but it got me thinking about this character, and I decided to give her five minutes of my time.

It so happened that at first I watched the Rebels in fragments, then I sat down to read the books of the new canon about Thrawn, and only then I watched the Rebels again, but as it should, from beginning to end without skipping. And all this time I didn’t like Arihnda Pryce terribly: she was written cool in the book, Zahn gave the character a character and personality, but personally I didn’t have much sympathy for her anyway. In the series, she is a simple spineless evil, which only does nasty things everyone around and is constantly angry at everything. And the way she interrogates Hera… More precisely, a correction: she does not interrogate her. She tortures her just like that, for enjoyment before start asking questions at all. Until the last episode, I didn’t feel anything for this character except irritation and a desire to punch a frying pan on her forehead.

But here's the finale… When she went out onto the balcony of the collapsing station, raised her head and perished in the fire, I was sorry for her almost to tears. I don't know why. I did not like her, I still do not justify any of her cruel and disproportionate actions.

I just want to understand… what was she thinking in her last moment, standing on the balcony of the collapsing station, before everything exploded? Why didn’t she go with the rebels, when they offered her, if not freedom, but at least life? Is it really out of loyalty to the Empire? Or did she simply decide to leave with honor, as far as she herself understood this concept, not wanting to accept help from Azadi? What if she had decided that death was better than the life of a disgraced criminal who would never be able to live in peace again anyway? Perhaps it was possible to "change skin", as did other imperial non-military officials. Many, like the same Amedda, even occupied some posts after the war, albeit nominally. She could disown everything, swear allegiance to the Republic, and earn yourself a not-so-bad existence, but… it would be an existence. Not life. And Arihnda, it seems to me, needs everything or nothing. She could have been patient, with the hope of some improvement in the situation in the future, that the Empire would return to Lothal and scatter new power in the corners. But then again, perhaps she basically didn’t want to nothing to go towards Azadi, and that is the point. And I can understand her.

Don't know. What do you think? Did you feel sorry for her or did you rejoice in her death? What do you think was in her head at that moment and what feelings did she experience?

[askweisswolf]

Continuing to chip away at uploading my stuff to AO3 to flesh out my poor profile while also spamming you all with work I just never posted to Tumblr for one reason or another.

The Silence of Guard Duty

Saran watched Alistair make his way back to his tent, smiling slightly at the spring in his step. He hadn’t been in such good spirits when they had started their night watch together, but some conversation had quickly fixed that; the poor man had been on edge ever since she had agreed to his request to visit his sister Goldanna in Denerim. The decision hadn’t been entirely for his benefit, she could admit--she was curious to see what Wade and Herren could do with the drake and dragon scales they had collected from the temple--but if it gave him some peace of mind, she was happy.

If she could manage to keep his spirits up and a smile on his face until they got there, that was good enough, too. She didn’t know how this conversation would go, but she could see how much Alistair wanted it to go one way, and she just… hoped his sister was everything he wanted her to be. For his sake, if nothing else. He was a good man, and he deserved that much.

The dwarf sighed and stretched absently, her eyes flicking up to the sky. She was getting better about tracking the stars, and she wasn’t tired yet. She’d stay out on the night watch a little longer before switching off with someone else back in camp, especially since she’d finally started to get comfortable on this log. Maybe if she looked at the stars long enough, she could trace the constellation of Alindra and her soldier love.

“I thought the rule was to never take the night watch alone?”

Leliana’s voice was soft, teasing; Saran couldn’t help the smile that curved her lips even if she tried, turning her eyes away from the sky as the human woman sat down beside her on the log, setting her bow next to her within easy reach. “Alistair sent you after me, did he?”

“He didn’t have to.” It was dry, now. “I know it’s been some time since the temple, but you still need your rest.”

That made her grimace, and she shifted, trying to ignore the subtle ache that still followed her at the movement. “I’m--”

“Saran.” It was gentle, but firm, and the dwarf’s mouth immediately snapped shut on her words. “Don’t say you’re fine when we both know you aren’t.”

Well, she wasn’t wrong. Saran sighed, stilling herself. “I was planning to come in soon,” she said. “I just… wanted to stay out for a little while, I suppose.”

Leliana studied her face for a moment before she nodded, glancing away to scan the surrounding woods; that seemed to be enough to satisfy her. “I enjoy the nights at camp,” she admitted. “The night always seems more peaceful to me. Safer.”

The dwarf was quiet for a moment as she contemplated that. On some level, the whole concept of a night was strange to her still; something she had slowly gotten used to over time, but there hadn’t been a night in Orzammar. She understood Leliana’s point, though, even if it wasn’t tied specifically to night itself, and she followed the former bard’s gaze as she continued to watch the woods. “I understand,” she murmured, because that feeling at least, the peace and the ease… she understood that, even if it had taken a while for her to tie it to night specifically the way humans, elves, and surface dwarves did.

“I feel the night grants us a reprieve from the troubles of the day.” Leliana blew out a breath and laughed now, something soft as she glanced at Saran. “Silly, isn’t it? The darkspawn never sleep, and they lurk in the shadows.”

Saran lifted a brow, wondering absently if she should point out that the archer was rambling; after a moment of thought, though, she decided against it. Her companion seemed to be trying to build to some point, and besides… she liked listening to her ramble. She liked listening to her in general, really.

“It’s not silly to seek moments to lay down your burdens,” is what she ultimately said, unable to help the quiet sigh that escaped her now. She shifted on the log, absently rubbing her knee. “In Orzammar, we had darkspawn pressing against us at all times from the Deep Roads. We still needed moments when we thought we were safe from it. I think everyone needs those.”

That seemed to soothe something in Leliana, or encourage her, particularly when their eyes met. She hummed quietly, pleased with the dwarf’s response, and looked away for a moment to check on her bow. Saran was comfortable to let the silence lapse, for the time being, and she hadn’t missed the way the redhead had watched her rub her knee. She was fine. She was. Wynne had warned her about her leg, but she’d be fine.

“Granted, we didn’t exactly have nights in Orzammar,” Saran continued, if only to move her thoughts away from the state of her leg. “But I understand what you’re saying, is my point.”

“I’m so glad we’re on the same page,” Leliana replied lightly, and it made the smaller woman crack a smile. The human shifted next to her, seeming content with the state of her bow, and continued her line of thought. “I just… I suppose I enjoy those nights when we stand guard together, talking to pass time in those small hours.”

There was a moment of silence as both of Saran’s eyebrows went up this time. She didn’t say anything while she did this, simply looked at Leliana, and the rogue huffed out another laugh at the sight. “Well, I’ll talk and you listen,” she amended.

“Better.”

That earned her a light shove and now she was the one laughing, gripping the log to keep from falling off. Leliana didn’t pull away after, though; she pressed warmly into the dwarf’s side instead, and the closeness of it made her heart trip over itself and miss a beat.

“As I was saying,” the former bard continued, and Saran had to bite back the responding grin, “sometimes I succumb and fall asleep, and wake to find you still watchful. And I know you’re… well, watching out for me.”

That slight pause made Saran’s heart skip another beat, and for a moment she nearly forgot to breathe. Her grip on the log tightened, and she wasn’t entirely sure why. “You never have to feel afraid with me,” she managed, when her brain finally decided it wanted to remember how speaking worked. “You--you know that, right?”

She hadn’t meant for it to come out as a question, but apparently her brain still wasn’t completely confident about this whole speaking thing with the current state of her heart, and things didn’t get better when she felt Leliana absently rest her hand over hers on the log. “I know,” the redhead murmured, and there was something about her tone that was soft, and warm, and oh, Stone help her, her heart was going to pound right out of her chest out of this rate. She quickly averted her eyes to the woods, and only hoped her face didn’t look as warm as the rest of her felt.

She didn’t pull away from Leliana’s hand, though, and that seemed to spur the other woman on. Saran didn’t see her take a breath, but she heard it, and then she was speaking again. “What I’m trying to say is that I trust you. I’m comfortable around you. I know that you will be there when I need you.” Now that she’d gotten going she plunged on, apparently not needing a response from her companion; if anything, this sounded like something she just wanted to say. “You are our leader, and my friend, and sometimes I think that… that maybe we could be more than that.”

Saran’s brain promptly forgot on the spot how speaking worked. It only took a second for the implications of those words to sink in, and she swallowed. The words still weren’t coming, but she managed a weak hum in response to Leliana’s words, and she hoped that would be enough.

It was clearly something, because when she risked a peek at her Leliana blew out a long breath, her shoulders slumping a little. “Maker,” she sighed, “look at me, stumbling over my words like an ill-educated peasant girl. Some bard I am.”

That got a frown out of the blonde, and something finally managed to click in her sluggish brain; that kind of statement wouldn’t do at all. She hesitated, then turned her hand under Leliana’s so she could grip hers, squeezing gently, and words finally seemed to cooperate as she studied the way their hands looked together. “I have to admit,” she managed, “someone like you being interested in me is flattering.”

Whatever response Leliana had been expecting to her confession, it apparently wasn’t that because she let out a startled laugh, her eyes focusing on Saran. “What, are you saying I have bad taste?” she asked, and the teasing lilt in her voice made the dwarf relax. “Why can’t I like you? You’re a good person, a great listener, a… a remarkable warrior.”

Saran snorted, resting her chin in the palm of her free hand as she watched the archer. She was pretty sure she was smiling, but at the moment, she didn’t care, and it only seemed to encourage Leliana to keep speaking. “You often show signs of intelligence, and you’re fairly good looking… most of your facial features are in the right place.”

“Thanks.” Saran’s smile didn’t fade an inch. “You’re so complimentary.”

Leliana hummed. “You’re welcome, I try.” Her good humor faded, though, and she met the dwarf’s gaze. “There… isn’t much more I can say. My feelings have been laid bare. You are… very special to me.”

It was being left to her, then. Lovely.

Saran knew what she wanted; she was well aware of her feelings for Leliana, at this point, and the human had never been subtle about her interest in her in the past. It was ironic, then, that for all of that she’d never actually considered it would get to this point. She’d kept waiting for the redhead to warm up to someone else in the party--the charming Zevran perhaps, or the genuinely well meaning Alistair, or even Morrigan, who could be surprisingly kind and sweet when you became someone she trusted. She’d just kept waiting for Leliana to realize the others were… better, but instead she seemed to have decided she wanted her.

She didn’t know how to put any of that into words, though, and instead decided to simply act when thought failed her. She’d done so twice before, with Adal and with Gorim; she could only hope the third time would have a better ending.

Under normal circumstances, Saran would never have considered trying to kiss Leliana. Their height difference when standing simply made it an awkward thing to consider, but sitting down on the log together like this… well, it was manageable. She’d certainly thought about it, but she hadn’t considered it possible until this moment, and when words failed her she grabbed on to that fact with both hands. She pulled her hand away from Leliana’s, ignoring the start of a pained sound from the human, and instead braced her palm on her shoulder as she leaned up and pressed their lips together.

It didn’t last long; all too soon, the Warden’s brain caught up with her actions, and she pulled away almost as quickly as she’d pressed up against the human as words finally decided to cooperate in her slightly panicked state. “I’m--I’m sorry,” she managed. “I shouldn’t have done that, I just--you’re very special to me too, and I’ve always wanted us to be more than just friends, but still, I shouldn’t have--”

Leliana’s eyes slowly opened as Saran continued to ramble--the dwarf hadn’t even noticed she’d closed them, despite how short the kiss had been--and anything else she had been thinking of even trying to say died on her tongue as the other woman cupped her face in her hands and leaned in, kissing her this time. Saran’s eyes drifted shut and she sighed, her grip on Leliana’s shoulder relaxing as the kiss deepened, and for a perfect moment the entire world seemed to stand completely still.

It ended, of course; even perfect things had to end, eventually. Leliana hummed as they parted, something low and husky, and pressed her lips to silvery strands of hair as Saran leaned against her and nuzzled. “Well,” she breathed, “that settles it, then.”

Saran just laughed quietly, closing her eyes, and right then nothing could have moved her from Leliana’s side.

[youreallyshouldtalkmore]

Unfreeze my Heart_Part 5

A.N:  An 7 part angst filled   AU eventually VentixReader, happy ending fanfic. That’s it!

Does anyone get LunAsmr’s Venti’s voice in their head now when they read or write fanfiction? Just me, okay...

Genshin Impact MasterList

----

You stood frozen as the wind gently caressed your hair. 

Your fingers flexed, unable to process what was going on. 

It was Venti who pulled back, looking up at you. His eyes glittered, “Please, don’t Y/N. I don’t want to lose you. I have lived for thousands of years and will live for thousands more, but you are the first that made it into my heart. I hate seeing you like this. I know it can be better for you. I want to make it better for you. I will make it better for you. Y/N….” 

You watched as a lone tear made its way down his cheek, followed by another. He reached up, placing a kiss on your cheek. “Y/N, please….this is not about Mondstat. This is about you and what you need. I want to give you what he is unable to. What you deserve after a lifetime of existing but never living. I want to be the one to shows you that. It may seem selfish but….”

You suddenly awoke and snatched yourself away from him. Your eyes were wide like a boar in a trap. 

Venti’s green eyes watched you as you took a step back. When you stumbled he instinctively reached out to steady, but you turned and ran. 

You didn’t look back. 

Where are you going? 

What is your destination? 

How would you know? 

How could you know? 

You just ran. Even when your lungs burned and your legs threatened to give out, you kept running.  Past the city of Mondstadt and Springvale. You collapsed somewhere in the road.  

Rain had begun to pour, drenching you, but you didn’t even seem to feel it as you let out a scream. 

Where are you going? 

What is your destination? 

You didn’t have one. 

You didn’t have one. 

You didn’t… 

“Y/N….” 

You looked up to see him standing there, his black cloak billowing behind him. The rain didn’t seem to bother him as his red eyes gazed down at you. You gazed wide-eyed up at him. 

Then he was kneeling down to your level before cupping your cheek. 

You had never really studied his eyes before. They were red but they were dark almost black. Even Diluc’s eyes seemed kinder in comparison. 

For a man with Pyro vision, he was…..so cold. 

“My dear Y/N….” he crooned, “That bard shouldn’t have said such words to you.  They were most improper. They only served to further dilute your mind.” He threw his cloak over you and pulled you close. 

He should have been warm. 

But he wasn’t. 

When Venti pulled you close, you felt fuzzy…in a way that you didn’t when you were close to ‘him’.  You reached up to touch your lips. They still tingled, and for a brief moment you wondered what it would be like if Venti did it again. 

You whimpered and reached up to clutch your head. He picked you up and walked off down the road. 

“Don’t worry Y/N. You will not have to bear this much longer.” 

He stopped and looked down at you, “You don’t have to bear this any more now. You know what you need to do, don’t you?” 

You looked up at him, and he gave a soft smile. But it didn’t reach his eyes. 

You had seen genuine smiles, and this wasn’t it. 

You didn’t know how to make one yourself, but after a few months, almost a year now, in Teyvat you understood the concept of a genuine smile. 

Venti’s smile was genuine. 

Venti’s laugh was real. 

Did that mean his tears were also real? 

Did he really cry…..for you? 

“Y/N…it’s time….” 

You realized for the first time that he had walked back towards Springvale and Mondstadt. Hilichurls and Abyss Mages gathered, all awaiting orders. They were twittering in the ranks. 

“It’s raining, Y/N. Even Celestia is helping you now.” He sat you down on your feet, and you still felt unsteady. 

He stood behind you and wrapped his arms around you. Then he kissed your cheek, lips lingering, “You can do this, Y/N. We will attack the gates of Mondstadt. Although it doesn’t rain in the city, it does on the outskirts. This is your chance. Your chance to end it all.” 

But the only thing that you could think of was…. 

Venti’s kiss on your cheek was like a butterfly’s touch, but his? 

‘His’ held no warmth. 

It held nothing. 

—--

“Are you really going to do this?” 

You blinked and realized you were at the crossing of the bridge. 

Jean had her sword at the ready. For once, you looked up at her eyes. They didn’t seem to be in contempt, but only….sadness? 

Was she sad that you were before her, bell in hand, and vision glowing. 

“Y/N, please think this over before you do something we all regret.” Amber had her bow notched and aimed at you, but her eyes were….pleading with you.  

“Come love, this how you repay me?” Kaeya grinned at you, but his grin didn’t reach his eye. His words weren’t callous as he continually gripped his sword. 

Diluc said nothing, his red eyes trained on you, Wolf Gravestone clutched in his hand. His body was tense as he stared at you. 

“Is this really what you want to do?” Jean asked quietly. 

How you managed to hear her over the rain was an amazing feat in and of itself. 

“Is this really the path you’ve chosen?”

You tilted your head up towards the rain, the droplets splashing your face. It hurt as they dropped into your eyes, but what difference did that make? 

The hilichurls and Abyss Mages all twittered around you, waiting for your order. 

Did you ever really have a choice? 

And even if you did, what other choice could you have chosen? 

So why, why were you hesitating? 

What were you waiting for? 

Even as you scanned the skies, what was it that you hoped to see? 

“Don’t hold back, Y/N.” 

Arms enfolded you from behind and the Visionbears of Mondstadt were able to see, for the first time, who he was. 

“Get them”, he ordered, and the Abyss Mages and Hillchurls attacked. 

You watched almost dispassionately even as he held you closer. 

“This is your chance, Y/N. A chance to warm yourself. To bring the feelings that your heart so readily desires.” 

Suddenly, an arrow whized from in front of you over your shoulder, making him jump back, using his cape to steady himself. 

“Your words are nothing but poison.” 

You looked up to see Venti hanging in the air, arrow trained on him. Gone was the happy-go-lucky bard as he glared at him. 

He and Venti stared at each other, Venti aiming a bow at him. 

His voice drawled, "Ahh….I know who you are." 

You crinkled your eyes. Was his voice always this….this…..

You weren't sure of the term. 

"Then we will need no introduction. Please leave Mondstadt." Venti’s voice was cold. 

“Provided that Y/N comes with me.”

“Y/N is quite capable of making up her own mind.” Venti smiled when he looked at you, “Y/N, I am the god of freedom, and you will always have the right to chose, but I hope you will still stay by my side. I really, really care about you. We still have time, even if I'm an Archon and you a mortal.”  

He sniffed, “Yes, how would that work? Eventually, the two of you will be parted.” 

Venti address it as if you had asked, his eyes never straying from yours. “I will outlive you, this I have accepted. But I don't want to forsake the present for the future.” 

You never could look people in the eyes very well, a hold-over from your old world. But what was it about Venti’s eyes that captivated you so? Then, as if becoming aware of what you were doing, you snatched your gaze away. But like a magnet, you couldn’t help but to slide your eyes back towards him. 

“Such pretty words…” He drawled. 

You couldn’t help but to turn your gaze towards him, looking at his red eyes as he continued,  “Even so, how fair is this arrangement? You will grow old and die, and he will remain as he is? Will he not tire of you eventually? He is here to defend his land, that's all, and you know it. 

His eyes were….

Were what compared to Venti’s? 

You hardly registered his words as you really looked at him. 

He cannot give you what he doesn't have himself. 

What he gives you, whatever he says, is not real. He’s only using you. Using your feelings and desires, twisting your pure intentions.

Venti spoke up then, “Yes, I am here to defend my land, but that doesn't make my feelings any less true. Besides, she knows now and whatever decision she makes I will accept. Be it with joy or sorrow.”  His voice trailed off, making you look back at him. He roused himself with a smile towards you before glaring at him. 

You looked up at the sky, raindrops falling into your eyes.  It hurt, but maybe…maybe…..

A decision, huh? 

For the first time in your life, you made one. 

And released your cryo vision…. 

Part 6 

[redinkofshame]

Another one! Keria meets with the King of Ferelden in her efforts to stop Fen'Harel.

Down in the Valley (or Meetings with the King: part 1)

Keria lurked in wait the dimly lit bedchamber. It was so large it practically echoed despite the lavish carpets that covered a considerable portion of the stone floor in an attempt to keep out the chill. Only a single candelabra was lit, set near the four-post bed, but she could see the entire space well enough thanks to her elven eyesight. It wasn’t opulent, not like the Orlesians, but it still definitely spoke of wealth.

She was sitting in a padded wooden chair at the desk she’d expected to find him at. She might’ve found him abed, too. Instead, she could hear splashing and off-key singing coming from the bathing chamber.

Her fingers itched to pull out a lyrium potion from her pack while she waited but she forced herself to ignore the urge, helping herself to a glass of the wine she’d spotted on a cabinet. The bottle was dusty; hopefully there wasn’t any darkspawn blood in it.

The bathchamber door burst open and out strolled a tall auburn-haired human with broad shoulders and a soft belly wearing a towel about his hips. She caught a glimpse of several scars, but was rather distracted by his dance moves.

“O! What are you doing, and where are you go-iiing? Your ponies need showing! The river is flow-iiiiing!,” he sang. With a hand grabbing a corner on either side he pulled open the towel and dried his butt by shaking it, his bits flapping in the breeze as he got to the chorus. “O! Tra-la-la-lally here down in the vall-ey!”

“So that’s why the humans think your family has holy blood,” she said, eyeing him pointedly. He was certainly a shower, but she only did it to throw him off guard. He startled, and she watched the way his eyes immediately found her at the desk, then swept the room; looking for threats, weapons, and escape routes no doubt. King Alistair Theirin’s warrior instincts were still rather sharp for coddled royalty. “I never understood the concept of ‘divine right’ before now. Though the singing leaves something to be desired.”

She watched his eyes move back to her and his gaze take in the missing arm she’d intentionally left visible, in case he didn’t immediately recognize her from their brief encounter in Red Cliffe, when she had taken the rebel mages off his hands. “Inquisitor Lavellan.” His jovial demeanor was gone. “Do my guards still live?”

Her heart swelled unexpectedly at that. She could tell from his tone that he didn’t ask because he wanted to know if there was any point in calling for help; he was worried about their safety. “Of course.”

He let out a breath, his evident relief belying his words. “Good. I get to fire them myself, then.”

“You could,” she agreed. Then she stood briefly and fade-stepped over to the edge of the bed and sat. “But it seems unfair to punish them when I came in through neither door nor window.”

“Neat trick. I suppose I can let them off with a warning. As you haven’t killed me yet I assume you have something to discuss.” Finally remembering he was naked, he muttered, “If you could just– ah– give me a moment…”

“If you must,” she said with exaggerated disappointment as he disappeared behind a dressing screen. It was amusing to watch him blush.

“To what do I owe the pleasure?” came his muffled question.

“I need your help.”

He didn’t respond to that until he returned dressed in sleep pants and a dressing robe. He carried the desk chair to sit across from her position in his bed, near the candelabra. “This isn’t about the time you wrote to ask me to help you win back the Dales for the elves, is it?”

“No, I was only joking.” Mostly. Not missing the opportunity to remind him of her sway over the Emperor of Orlais, she added, “I’ve kept Gaspard from rattling his sword at you thus far, haven’t I? That would sort of defeat the purpose of all that negotiation.”

“Yes, I imagine so,” he hedged. “So this is about that… Other thing, then. The Inquisition’s Wolf.”

She nodded once. The nickname had been catching on. Not the worst one she’d heard for Solas. She quite missed Chuckles, though.

He let out a long breath. “I think it would be simpler to go to war over the Dales,” he grumbled. “Go on, then.”

“It’s not as bad as all that,” she assured him. “At least, I don’t think so. I need mabari. As many as you can get me.”

“Mabari? That shouldn’t be too difficult; the Ash Warriors still call themselves king’s men. I’ll–”

He cut off as she shook her head. “No good. They pair with their dogs, right? I can’t have humans in the mix. Or anyone other than dwarves, for that matter. It’s also probably best to have more than a one-on-one ratio. But there might be time for the Warriors to breed more…”

“Why dwarves?”

“Dwarves don’t dream.”

She watched as he took that in. Somberly, he replied, “It’s true what they say, then? He can catch you in your dreams?” After she nodded, he said, “Do you think that– I mean, I’m no dwarf…”

“Have you had any dreams of wolves, as of late?”

He shook his head. A lack of wolves didn’t really mean anything, but it seemed to make him feel batter. “I don’t think he has a reason to target you. So long as my visit here never leaves the room, he never should.”

“Unless he starts wondering about my new mabari obsession.”

She shrugged. “It’s a risk we have to take, unfortunately. Here–” She handed him an amulet bearing the symbol of the Inquisition that she and Dagna had enchanted for the purpose. She had a pocket full of them, actually. “This should protect you while you sleep.”

He took it, but he only looked at it, and her, skeptical.

“It’s not fool proof — in fact, if he does try to spy on you and senses the shield it will only raise his suspicions — but it should slow him down.”

He watched her longer still. She couldn’t read his thoughts, and tried to think of what she’d say if he asked what would happen next while Solas was ‘slowed down’, but in the end he pulled it on and tucked it beneath his robe.

“I’ll keep it hidden.”

“See that you do.”

Alistair sighed. “I’ll see what I can do about the dogs. There are bound to be dwarves among the Warriors. Anything else?”

“I’ll let you know.” She stood and moved to retrieve her pack.

Before she could Fade step away, though, he asked tentatively, “Is it… True, about you and him?”

She cleared the knot in her throat. Stupid, that such a simple question could instantly make her eyes prick. “He’s not what you think. He’s not what they make him out to be.” She could hear the pleading in her own voice.

“Riiiiight. That’s why you just asked me for an army.”

She bit her lips together. She’d defended him from the start, and she wasn’t about to stop now — but there was a certain kind of humiliation that came with it. She knew what people must think of her, heard the whispers about her denial. A silly woman still holding a torch for a bad man. She knew better, but she understood why they didn’t, and it left her unsure what to say.

She settled for, “He’s not what he makes himself out to be,” before reaching for a lyrium potion and stepping back into the Fade.

[jmrothwell]

Prompt: Sunburn

Slices of Summer(Four): A look at the band’s first summer together. Can they figure out boundaries, communication, visibility, among other things and still enjoy their summer?

First; Prev Next

__________

Reggie was uncomfortably laying down on the studio couch. His skin felt too tight over his muscles and bones, and like it was being held in place by millions of tiny needles; he even felt a minor throbbing at the back of his head.. Despite wearing a tank top and shorts he still felt way too hot. He felt a whine escape his throat. He did not miss this. 

“How could this even happen?” That was Alex’s voice, high and tight. Reggie winced, but kept his eyes closed, he was trying his best to keep his mind off the pain. Tried to think of anything else. His mind was not cooperating. The nearby conversation probably wasn’t helping. 

“I didn’t even think ghosts could get sunburnt” Julie’s concern at least came out in a whisper.

“Neither did we” Luke meanwhile never understood the concept of volume control. Reggie groaned as he finally opened his eyes, he didn’t keep them open. Damn sun was too bright. Of course if he’d gotten sunburnt this bad, the first time in years he had, he’d also be suffering some heat exhaustion symptoms. What kind of lousy luck was that? At least he wasn’t nauseous, he would be happy to never feel that particular sensation ever again.

“But why now? I know Reg has snuck out to the beach plenty before yesterday and this has never happened before.” Alex could really join Luke on those volume control lessons. 

“Guess it’s part of the price to pay to be fully visible” Reggie groaned out.

It had happened a couple hours into their beach day. Julie had finally decided to risk going and changing into her suit. A purple halter bikini with some red and blue plaid short shorts. He and Luke were admittedly staring dumbly a her while she walked back from the changing room, when a stranger stopped just off to his left looking down at him.

Well no it couldn’t have been at him, it was probably more towards Julies stuff around him. However, the stranger spoke and was looking right at Reggie, “Hey man, do you need some sunscreen? You’re looking a little pink.”

“What?” It was all Reggie could articulate. Maybe this stranger was also a ghost. Yeah, they were just some ghost. Why would a ghost offer another ghost sunscreen? Then almost as if to just keep throwing him off, the lifer who had just been at the most definitely lifer food truck came up and handed this stranger food. A ghost would definitely not need food. 

“Just be careful man,” The stranger called as they and their friend walked off. Reggie glanced at Luke. He needed to make sure he didn’t imagine that. Luke was still staring at the stranger. Cautiously their eyes met, and slowly smiles crept across their faces. The next second they were dashing ecstatically to Julie.

Julie definitely looked like she had questions, because Julie also definitely saw. Reggie giddily picked her up in an excited hug. He couldn’t seem to stop shouting “They saw me.” Luke soon joined the hug with his own excited shouting. 

“Oh my god! This changes everything!” Reggie realized he no longer had to hold himself back. This could be just like any other beach day. Still carrying a laughing and mildly protesting Julie, Reggie dashed towards the water. Deep in the back of his mind he hoped whatever power decided to make him visible kept going for the rest of the day. Otherwise Julie might be center stage at a haunted beach. 

Honestly, it had been one of the best days Reggie has had. Even when he got home and was slammed with sudden exhaustion, it wasn’t so bad. The guys hadn’t really needed to sleep and Reggie missed it a little. Then he woke up this morning with one of the worst sunburns he’s had. 

Throughout his life Reggie had often wondered if there was some force out there that specifically enjoyed messing with him. This was definitely one of those times. He had just spent a wonderful day at the beach with Julie and Luke two of his favorite people. Now, now he could barely move and just felt miserable. 

Reggie’s internal self pitying was cut short by a hand to his forehead. It was definitely too small and a little too warm to be any of the guys. It still felt nice, while it was warmer than the guys it was still cooler than his own forehead at the moment. He hesitantly blinked his eyes open to look at Julie’s concerned face. He quirked a small smile and managed to whisper out a “hey.”

“Hey,” she replied, tentatively returning the smile, her hand gently stroked over his forehead and through his hair, “I heard somewhere cool baths are supposed to help. Wanna give it a try?”

Reggie groaned at the thought of moving but she wasn’t exactly wrong and he told her as much, “although aloe vera is supposed to be even better and neither are going to do much for this headache. Besides the bathroom out here only really has a shower.”

Julie hummed as he heard Alex volunteer to find some aloe vera and poof out. Then she gently continued on “Do you wanna see if ghosts can take Tylenol?”

Reggie shook his head as best as he was able. They still barely understood how the whole visibility thing worked, they were essentially hopeless when it came to understanding how the ghosts eating thing worked. He didn’t really want to test his luck at the moment. 

“Well Carlos and Dad are out at the moment for some father son bonding time. Said they wouldn’t be back for a few hours if you want to use one of the bath’s in the house. At the very least maybe you should hang out in the house where it’s cooler than out here?” Julie suggested keeping her voice low. Reggie attempted to hum but it came out more of a moan as his eyes closed on their own.

Then Luke spoke up, actually managing to also keep his voice low for once, “Hey if it doesn’t hurt your head too much, maybe we could even hang out and watch a movie together?”

Reggie smirked his eyes still closed, “I’d like that.”

_______

AN: As always let me know what you think! Prompt taken from here. Full list of my fics found here.