#but basically the movies/shows are all out there for free too if you're ready to a do a bit of creative googling

[astxroiid]

new york private life // tasm! peter parker

❥ childhood crush, date nights, vigilantes, apprehension, sweet young love.

wc: 1.5k

navigation ✩ empire state of mind (II) ✩ manhattan longing (III)

"Hey, um... I'm Peter."

A familiar face stands in front of you, one you've known all your life.

"We went to high school together. I, uh, was wondering if maybe you'd want to maybe hang out sometime." The walls of the college cafeteria seem to be closing in around Peter. His hands twitching nervously as he shifted his feet uneasily.

"Oh!" you're caught a little off guard. "Well, I'm free tomorrow. Where will we be going?"

Peter smiles to himself a little. "There's this sushi place that just opened up a few blocks over... if you like sushi, that is."

The amount of anxiety radiating off this poor boy is so potent you can practically taste it.

"I love it," you grin up at the boy from your seat. "Pick me up at 5:30? we could be there by 6."

"Th-that sounds great!" His eyes light up as an excited smile spreads across his face. He's never gotten a this positive of a response before. This feels good.

"I'll pick you up at 5:30 then. Thank you," he says, trying not to be too happy about this, but he is. Very.

“Sounds like a date to me.” you smile, stand from your seat and kiss his cheek before walking away with a bounce in your step.

A date?! A kiss to his cheek! He's never felt so alive before! His cheeks burn red as you walk away. He can't believe that you said yes.

When 5:30 comes around the next day, you’re waiting by the entrance of your house, ready to meet up with Peter. You’re a bit nervous, but mostly excited. You felt a strange flutter in your stomach, your heart beating fast and body tingling.

When 5:45 comes, you start to worry. Where could Peter be?

5:50. Your heart begins to sink. Was this all a joke?

5:55. Is he... not coming?

6:00. You're officially distraught. Your mind immediately starts running to various conclusions. Is he busy? Did something happen to him? Or did he simply change his mind?

6:15. Maybe he forgot? Maybe he's late? Maybe he lost track of time?

6:30. Your eyes are puffy and red. Tears start to stream down your face as you realize he’s probably not coming.

7:00. Anger replaces sadness. Did he do this on purpose?! What the hell?! What was the point of even asking you out?

8:00. Sadness returns. After all your emotions drained your energy and tears blurred your eyes, you cant help but come back ton the thought: Why did he do this? He can't even have the courtesy to at least call you?

Just as the thought come to mind, your phone rings. It's Peter.

Your eyes widen and you quickly pick up the phone. You desperately hope that this might just change things, but you also can't help and start to feel anxious, afraid of what he might have to say.

"Hey," Your voice cracks as you hold the phone to your ear.

Peter's heart sinks at your tone, immediately feeling at fault. "Hey," he echoes in a small tone. "I'm sorry I didn't show up today..." he says, almost inaudible for a moment. He sounds... shaky. Nervous. "Something came up..."

In what world is that a good excuse for leaving a girl waiting for you for two and a half hours? He mentally cringes, wishing he could explain better. How? 'Hey, sorry I basically ghosted you , I'm Spiderman and I had to stop a robbery?!' it almost sounds made up.

"oh..." the same, tearful tone etched into your voice from before. "it's okay, I guess."

He gulps at the sadness in your voice, feeling worse now, not sure how to handle this situation.

"My aunt called me. She had some things she needed help with," he said, trying his best to avoid giving details. "I lost track of time and only just realized how late it was. I was rushing as fast as I could but I know I missed our date. I'm sorry, I should have at least sent you a text."

“It’s okay.” you sound only slightly more cheerful. “How about you make it up to me come over with some takeout and we watch a movie?”

"Really?" he asks, sounding surprised. After the tense conversation you both just had, he didn't think the night - or relationship for that matter - would be salvageable. "I mean sure," he says, not being able to hide the joy in his voice or the smile on his face. "What kind food do you want?"

“You pick.” You smile “Come over as soon as you can.”

꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷♡꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦

About 20 minutes later Peter knocks on your door. You open it to reveal the sweetest looking boy with flowers an Thai food in hand, appearing a little guilty but still excited.

You couldn't resist smiling back at him, feeling much less mad about what happened earlier.

"Sorry for the wait," Peter apologizes as he hands you the bouquet of tulips. You gladly take them.

Walking over to the kitchen and filling a vase with water, you call out to Peter, who's still standing in the doorway.  

“You can come in Pete! You can set the food down over there," you gesture to the coffee table, covered in candles and books for your college classes.

Pete?! He smiles warmly as he enters into the living room and he watches you set the flowers in the vase. Peter glances around your apartment, your home is quite cozy.

Dark blue curtains hang around each window, soft lights from the New York night glowing through. Every surface in your home is decorated with mixtures of candles, lamps, books, or cute little trinkets.

The whole place smells like cherries and coffee. The soft music playing in the background bringing the whole mood together.

He goes ahead and sets the food down on the coffee table and he looks around the room. "Your place is nice," he says softly. He loves it. he could get used to spending more time here.

“Why thank you.” You blush, placing the flowers down “Oh! I was thinking about watching some of the Star Wars movies - is that okay?” You plop on the couch, patting next to you for Peter to sit.

"Star Wars is always okay with me," Peter replies, happy that you're not upset anymore. He sits down next to you and he can't help but notice how close you're both sitting next to each other. His heart flutters.

"The Empire Strikes Back is my favorite," Peter replies excitedly, happy to be sharing one of his interests with you.

He smiles, feeling very happy with the current state of things.

"That's my favorite too!" You smile brightly, looking into his eyes.

There was an odd and almost indescribable intimacy between you two, as if your shared love of Star Wars had brought you closer together in some unknown way.

“Really?” Peter asks, feeling thrilled by this coincidence.

You nod, giggling at Peter's excitement.

"What's your favorite character?" Peter asks. He's trying to watch the movie, although it's hard to take his eyes off of you for too long.

"Hmmm..." you place your finger on your chin, feigning deep thought. "Obi Wan, hands down the best in my opinion. What about you?"

"Definitely Han Solo," he replies, smiling. You notice how his cheeks are a bit red right now.

Is he blushing?

"He's cocky and always in the middle of trouble, but so charismatic and charming," Peter adds. He leans closer, getting a little more comfortable on the couch.

"Who's your least favorite?"

You notice him moving closer but don’t mind at all “Kylo Ren, I think. His character is just too underdone - they could’ve done better. What about you, Pete? Who’s your least favorite?” You lean in close to him, placing Your hand on his shoulder.

"Totally agree," Peter says quickly, gulping. "Kylo Ren sucks."

Chills take over Peter's body as your hand rests on his shoulder.

You're sitting awfully close, and the thought of it makes his head rush. He wishes he could take his eyes off of you.

Your heart begins to pound. He's getting so lost in the atmosphere.

You smile and turn your head back to the TV watching along as Han Solo grabs Leia, kissing her deeply. There's an ache in your chest for something similar.

Please kiss me. Peter's mind races and begs. Just go for it! He silently urges himself.

He's dying to turn his head towards you. The closeness is sending him into a spiral of emotion. If only he could find the courage to make a move. As he glances your way, he notices you're not looking at him; your attention is elsewhere. A wave of disappointment washes through him.

Peter looks to his fidgeting hands, now incredibly insecure.

Is he reading the signals wrong? His heart sinks. Does she not feel the same way?

His breath is shaky and he's afraid of ruining the evening.

Peter decides it's best to focus on the movie and not his growing, aching feelings.

I hope y'all enjoyed my first fic in a loooong time lmao, big thanks to character.ai for helping me come up with this!

[neotriobrainrot-reborn]

INTRODUCTION/ MASTERPOST (V4)

(hiya, reposting my masterpost because I'm a dumbass and had accidentally deleted the main post. And considering I changed the name of my ao3 and Twitter, I needed to make another one to fix it)

[ao3: CosmicEcosystem]

https://archiveofourown.org/users/CosmicEcosystem

[Twitter: @MetallicForest]

[Alt Account: @goldenphalloides(Tumblr) and @goldPhalloides (Twitter)]

[Ey: Important Update to this masterpost. I decided to make an alt account called @goldenphalloides to store all of my writing and art so that it doesn't get drowned out by Reblogs on my main. You can still send stuff like asks and requests here ofc! But I'll just be posting the stuff on the alt!]

This will change as I post more fics and make other changes, so anyone can check this at anytime and be caught up!

With that out of the way, sup! I decided to make a Masterpost that'll involve stuff I've written, drawn, and stuff I may plan on doing in the future

Most importantly, sorry for not writing anything in a while, I was burnt out, It's a work in progress, but I am trying to get back into writing, which is why I made this post in the first place

These are a list of the series/fandoms I'm interested in and will write for:

(Keep in mind that this entire post is subject to change as time goes on)

Fandoms:

Epithet Erased

The Amazing World of Gumball

In Stars and Time

Spiderverse Movies

Bug Fables

A Hat in Time

Little Witch Academia

Mario (in general: stuff like paper Mario, the Mario & Luigi RPGs, etc)

Sonic (In general)

Little Nightmares

Amphibia

The Owl House

Celeste

Zelda

The Mother Series (Mother 1/Earthbound 0, Earthbound/Mother 2, and Mother 3)

More to be added or possibly removed as time goes on

REQUESTS:

For anyone that had previously sent a request for something that I've never gotten too(I know there was at least 4 stuff I still haven't gotten to even months later), I do apologize for that. Life had hands I just wasn't ready for-

Regardless, I am now getting back into the groove of writing. My requests are open and I will take asks. Whether it's in the form of a writing request, or ya simply want a space to ramble: Ask, and the Golden Forest shall provide! You can send a request in any form, whether it be through an ask, a post (as long as you ping me), a submission, a DM, any method goes!

Though, you should keep a few things in mind:

I am free to deny requests & Asks. I'm just writing for fun, and to improve it to something I'm proud of, but mostly fun!

While I'm not opposed to writing romance, I do prefer Gen/Platonic stuff a lot more as I love platonic dynamics more than anything else! It's more of a personal preference than anything.

Please be patient. Believe it or not, I do have a life and some things will take me longer to get to than others, so please be patient and I'll get to ya!

Just practice basic courtesy

No NSFW.

Boundaries

My list of boundaries are pretty simple, but important

Proshippers & anyone who agrees with that nasty crap DNI (Do not interact) with me

If you're racist, homophobic, Transphobic, a bigot, or in any way and in any shape & form against the LGBTQIA+ community, DNI with me.

that's about it as far as it goes. Below here will be a list of stuff I've written categorized fandom to fandom. Each fic will have a link. a summery, and my thought process when writing it.

Before I show what I wrote, it's important to mention that I've only written stuff for Epithet Erased so far. I am branching out now into a variety of more stuff now, but this is just to let ya know so it doesn't look completely weird.

---------------

---------------

Epithet Erased:

The Power of Friendship (and a gun)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/37548673/chapters/93719221

An old work I wrote about a year ago where the entire premise is if Phoenica had a real ass goddamn gun during her encounter with the Wolf. I know they don't exist in the epithet world, but it was a Crack fic I wrote in 1 hour for April fools

♤♡◇♧

Neo Flavored Cookies (726 words)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/38738505

A short one-shot about Molly, Trixie, and Phoenica trying to bake cookies. Pretty fun overall!

♤♡◇♧

Everything's (not) Okay - Broken Royalty part one (13k words)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/36271753/chapters/90421513

An unfinished fic involving an au where the Fleecities were abusive.

This was one of the first things I've written, and looking back on this, I kind of hate it. I don't really like a lot of the writing decisions I've made. A lot of it was ooc, even for an au, and a good amount of moments didn't feel too put together. However, I would be wrong if I said this fic had no value. It personally kickstarted my writing journey!

I do want to mention that I do and don't plan on finishing it. While the work is discontinued, I am working on something called "Re-Spored" which will basically involve rewrites of my old fics (like this, for example)

♤♡◇♧

Spotify Drabbles (100 words)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/43944868/chapters/110493883

Just a drabble challenge thing I did a while ago. I don't really plan on updating it past chapter 1.

♤♡◇♧

Amphibia Erased Neo - Part One (Over 20k words)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/37727497/chapters/94188754

An old fic I'm kind of fond for, although most of them are technically old lol.

The premise involves Molly, Phoenica, and Trixie getting warped to Amphibia in the Calamity Trio's place. As of now, it's discontinued as I plan on rewriting it for "Re-Spored". There's a lot I didn't like when looking back on this(like the characters feeling ooc since this was written before Prison of Plastic, not enough unique moments/scenes, etc), but I'm still fond of it since I had fun writing it!

♤♡◇♧

Hedgehog Heaven (481 words)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/46215691

Just an April fools fic I wrote about with Mushroom Girl (background character) being obsessed with hedgehogs. Nothing much, but it's a fun read

♤♡◇♧

Mushroom Girl Drabbles

https://archiveofourown.org/works/46809085/chapters/117902524

As the name says, it's a drabble list about a background character that earned the status of blorbo. I do plan to have 10 chapters of drabbles!

Spiderverse Movies (ITSV and ATSV)

[WIP: will be updated]

Bug Fables

[WIP: will be updated]

A Hat In Time

[WIP: will be updated]

Mario

[WIP: will be updated]

Sonic

[WIP: will be updated]

Little Nightmares

[WIP: will be updated]

Amphibia

Amphibia Erased Neo - Part One

https://archiveofourown.org/works/37727497/chapters/94188754

A fic which involves the Neo Trio(from Epithet Erased) going to Amphibia in the Calamity Trio's place. At no point does the Calamity trio show up, but I'd say it's fun to read! However, keep in mind it is discontinued. I plan on rewriting it as a part of "Re-Spored" with the chosen name being "Amphibia Neapolitan Flavor" (name is subject to change)

The Owl Ho2use

[N/A, will be updated]

Wordgirl

[N/A, will be updated, though I am only getting into the series most recently so this may take a bit more time than the others]

Celeste

[N/A, will be updated]

Zelda

[N/A, will be updated]

Mother Series

[N/A, will be updated]

--------------

WIP (Work In Progress)

Fractured Bell

Fandom(s): Epithet Erased

The Respored (aka rewrite) version of "Everything's Not Okay - Broken Royalty Part One". For context, scroll up until you see "Everything's (Not) Okay"

I'll just say it up front, nothing about the story I had in mind for the original version of the fic justifies it even being more than one chapter, let alone 20 and a multi part thing. Barely anything about "Everything's (Not) Okay" made sense in my eyes, looking back at it. The original plot was faulty, everyone was ooc even for an au excluding maybe Rick, and if I ramble even more about how much I don't like one of my old fics I'll be on my death bed. Ironically, I'm still fond of it, but more In a "Aww, well aren't you an adorable piece of garbage" way.

So involving this rewrite to keep things short, will be only one chapter. The chapter will most likely be a long one-shot(possibly up to 20k words. At the bare minimum, it'll be around 7,500 words), but still a one-shot

Tldr: I'm turning Brokeon Royalty into a One-shot and naming it "Fractured Bell"

Amphibia: Neapolitan Flavor

Fandom(s): Epithet Erased & Amphibia

The respored (rewrite) of "Amphibia Erased Neo"

I kind of like the original version better than Broken Royalty, but it still had its problems. The chapters weren't really too unique, and while the frogs(like Sprig, Polly, etc) were in character, the human characters(Molly, Phoenica, Trixie) weren't.

The rewrite is meant to be a complete overhaul of the original fic, where it changes nearly everything from the original.

Garden of Fungi & Flowers

Fandom(s): Epithet Erased

Just a short One-shot involving how Mushroom Girl meets the blond girl with a flower in her hair, nothing much! Just full of fluff!

--------------

That's basically it. Wouldn't call it a list, but it's there!

With everything out the way, hop into my ask box to your own comfort! Even a simple "hi" is pog! :D

Update #1: I've added Wordgirl, Celeste, Zelda, and the Mother Series to the fandoms I'll be writing for (Though keep in mind that I'm only getting into these recently so it may take me some time to gain enough knowledge of the characters before I start writing)

Update #2: I added a category called "Current WIP" where it details personal stuff I'm writing outside of asks/requests

Update #3: I Made a small post that briefly details what tags I use and what they mean. It'll be linked below this

[sheenashifts1217]

Hii,I hope you're doing great and taking care of yourself!

I came across your reading post and i was wondering if you still accept requests, if not it's fine but if you do I'd like to request a reading with a message of my s/o. His name is Jean (he/him) he's a famous guitarist and my name is Hanna.

Hope you can do it,but if not there's no problem,please take care of yourself and thanks you!🫶🏻🫶🏻

Hello, my love. Thank you for your kind words and being so sweet. You are actually my last free reading that I am doing. From now on, I will be doing paid readings only. :)

What Jean has to say to Hannah

Lyrics standing out:

“Things are getting heavy

Wrapped in leather ready to go

Don’t stop the music

Anything we want

Anytime we want

Not gonna live any other way

His friends are so hot

A hundred little Betty’s all staring at me

I was cruisin for some lovin

I’m ready to go

We ride fast like a bullet

Ride all day

1, 2, 1, 2, 3

I got a gang full of bruisers

Don’t stop the music”

He’s a partied and he’s ready to bring you along. He knows that he gets a lot of female attention, but he want you to know that you’re the only one he sees. You all live a fast life, but hell never forget to love you and be the one you need. You’re his family, his rock, he does all of this for you. There’s nothing you could do that could make him not want you. And he’ll always have eyes for you. He wants you to remember all the fun you’ve had together and know that it’s not over.

Lyrics standing out:

“I have a dream about her

Rings my bell

She rocks

Doesn’t give a damn

I’m just a teenage dirtbag baby

Listen to Iron Maiden baby with me

(He likes to go to concerts with you/likes when you’re at his concerts)

Her boyfriend’s a dick (I feel like he was talking about himself and kind of joking)

Know what she’s missing

Man I feel like mold

She’s walking over to me

Must be fake

How does she know

Why does she give a damn

Come with me Friday, don’t say maybe

Like you”

In his past, he felt like no one took him seriously, but you. You were the one who believed in him. Im picking up that maybe you’re parents or some authority figure don’t approve of him for you, but he doesn’t care. He’s your man and nothing anybody says will change that. Sometimes he may even play into the “teenage dirtbag” or “dick boyfriend” persona just to show that he doesn’t care what they say, but he’s never a dick to you. I heard “you’re my princess”. He wants to bring you on stage with him because he’s working on a song just for you. Do you sing? If you do, he wants to sing with you. “You’re the coolest chic I’ve ever know”. He possibly wants you guys to paint your finger nails together. I know that was random, but I’m seeing black fingernail polish.

Lyrics standing out:

“Shut up and put your arms around me

Put on my favorite song

Get it on

Why talk

Forget about it

Skip the fight

Be careful what you say to me

I know you didn’t mean to

What if you made a move on me (GIRL, he wants to shut you up by kissing you OMG)

Hold my hand

Green light baby go

Tonight you won’t be cold

Nobody’s wrong”

Not to get too deep into it because it isn’t that kind of reading, but he wants you to be more frisky. He really likes it when you make the moves. If there’s a height difference between you guys, he adores it. He adores all of you and really wants you to know that you are beautiful. He hates when you guys fight. I’m feeling like you guys can both be a little jealous and possessive with each other. He says he likes your protective side. He said, “gets me going”.

He’s basically telling you that you’ve got him in the palm of your hand. Do what you want with him, he’s yours. He loves to hear you yap and see that expression on your face when you get excited over something. He wants to hear all about your dreams and he’ll always support you.

I’m also hearing, “step out of your comfort zone, try something new”. He wants you to be more confident and believe in yourself. He’s always there to lift you up and he loves doing that. But he can only reassure you so much. You have to know your worth and understand you are loved.

Sending you so much love, beautiful. I hope this resonates and helps. Please reach out with feedback and let me know what you think 🤗💗🫶

[gaymerasmus]

hi!!! saw your request open!!! can I get medic and heavy with an s/o that has albinism and scars? sorry if it's so specific 👉👈

No worries! Thank you and I hope you like it :)

Heavy

Upon meeting you, he honestly didn't even realize it until you brought it up. Nothing bad he just isn't observant sometimes <3

He's super supportive though! Loves reassuring you if you ever feel insecure about your scars and skin. Despite being so reserved, he'll often take any chance he has to show you how beautiful he thinks you are

Don't expect any PDA or public anything for that matter, but in private he's constantly tracing your scars and admiring your complexion.

This guy just loves so hard all he wants to do is dote and admire <3

If you tell him you don't want that kind of attention he also has no problem giving you space. Be it silently reading next to you, leaving the base to give you room, or anything in-between really, he's very conscious of how comfortable you are most of the time.

If your scars cause you pain get ready for Even More Doting from this secret mama bear.

When you're willing to be more intimate, he'll rub lotion onto your shoulders and back. He quietly worships any piece of skin you choose to expose to him, so he's completely content with taking care of you while that happens.

Even when you're not comfortable with touch, he'll leave out things for you to use on your skin and encourages you to use them.

Tbh I think with him coming from the opposite of a desert in the middle of hot-as-balls Mexico or whatever he prefers staying indoors. Some may even say he's a bit of a homebody, but that doesn't stop him from having fun with you.

Loves doing "rainy day" activities with you when the sun is too much to deal with. Board games, arts and crafts, reading, movies; all things he absolutely adores. Especially when he gets to do them with you around <3.

Medic

Unlike Heavy, he notices basically right away. I mean. He's like a doctor and stuff so it's kind of What He Looks For All The Time.

However, he doesn't ever mention it until you do. It didn't seem to be killing you, so he doesn't really see the point in bringing it up.

He's also not as doting as his dear companion, but if you need help with anything he makes sure to be available.

It's not like he doesn't care, he's just a Very Busy Man and honestly kind of forgets about it sometimes.

And when he's not exactly available (typically around the same time he's elbow deep in his colleagues) he's always willing to direct you to whatever you need, or just support you with words.

Completely Drowns you in compliments and flirts, btw. He doesn't even check to see if people are around before he does it either. Just completely shameless line after line, anything to make you blush.

Obviously he leaves no question when it comes to the subject of taking care of your scars. When his hands are clean they're always on your body somewhere. He also loves tracing your scars, which usually accompanies the compliments he peppers your ears with.

He actively encourages you to show him every scar you have, and often rewards your boldness with gentle kisses to each one.

If you're comfortable with that, of course. If not he's just as happy watching them from afar while you go about your day.

Loves when you spend your day in his lab!! It's always nice to have company that isn't feathered, and he'll often end up explaining his experiments to you while you do your thing.

He keeps a drawer on his desk free for snacks so you don't have to leave to eat :)

He's secretly so clingy just don't tell him it's obvious <3

They are so :)). I think Medic acts like how Heavy would act if he had a little less shame, but they both love and support you. Medic has more fun with it since he's had more experience with these things and will probably poke fun at you if you don't kill him for it. I hope you liked this, I tried to keep the HC's related to the prompt but I trial off sometimes lol. Thank you again!!

[goldenphalloides]

INTRODUCTION/ MASTERPOST (V2)

[ao3: CosmicEcosystem]

[Twitter: @MetallicForest]

[Main Account: @neotriobrainrot-reborn(tumblr)/@MetallicForest(Twitter)

Important: Please look at the reblogs comments from me for updates. I'll put them all there just for easy access! They will also be tagged as "Masterpost.Update on my blog to make it even more easy

Ey: I'm @neotriobrainrot-reborn (aka fungireborn). This is just a sideblog/alt account where I'll only post stuff related to stuff I write/draw so that it isn't constantly suffocated by reblogs. I'm a pretty friendly dude, and while I'm not too outspoken, I would love to interact with others!

Most importantly, sorry for not writing anything in a while, I was burnt out, but now I'm trying to get back into the groove of writing more often.

There are a few important things that should be known before I show the stuff I wore here

These are a list of the series/fandoms I'm interested in and will write for:

(Keep in mind that this entire post is subject to change as time goes on)

Fandoms:

Epithet Erased

Spiderverse Movies

Bug Fables

Hollow Knight

A Hat in Time

Mario (in general: stuff like paper Mario, the Mario & Luigi RPGs, etc)

Sonic (In general)

Little Nightmares

Amphibia

The Owl House

Wordgirl

Celeste

Zelda

The Mother Series (Mother 1/Earthbound 0, Earthbound/Mother 2, and Mother

More to be added or possibly removed as time goes on

REQUESTS:

For anyone that had previously sent a request for something that I've never gotten too(I know there was at least 4 stuff I still haven't gotten to even months later), I do apologize for that. Life had hands I just wasn't ready for-

Regardless, I am now getting back into the groove of writing. My requests are open and I will take asks. Whether it's in the form of a writing request, or ya simply want a space to ramble: Ask, and the Golden Forest shall provide! You can send a request in any form, whether it be through an ask, a post (as long as you ping me), a submission, a DM, any method goes!

Though, you should keep a few things in mind:

I am free to deny requests & Asks. I'm just writing for fun, and to improve it to something I'm proud of, but mostly fun!

While I'm not opposed to writing romance, I do prefer Gen/Platonic stuff a lot more as I love platonic dynamics more than anything else! It's more of a personal preference than anything.

Please be patient. Believe it or not, I do have a life and some things will take me longer to get to than others, so please be patient and I'll get to ya!

Just practice basic courtesy

No NSFW.

Boundaries

My list of boundaries are pretty simple, but important

Proshippers & anyone who agrees with that nasty crap DNI (Do not interact) with me

If you're homophobic, Transphobic, and in any way and in any shape & form against the LGBTQIA+ community, DNI with me.

that's about it as far as it goes. Below here will be a list of stuff I've written categorized fandom to fandom. Each fic will have a link. a summery, and my thought process when writing it.

Before I show what I wrote, it's important to mention that I've only written stuff for Epithet Erased so far. I am branching out now into a variety of more stuff now, but this is just to let ya know so it doesn't look completely weird.

---------------

---------------

Epithet Erased:

The Power of Friendship (and a gun)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/37548673/chapters/93719221

An old work I wrote about a year ago where the entire premise is if Phoenica had a real ass goddamn gun during her encounter with the Wolf. I know they don't exist in the epithet world, but it was a Crack fic I wrote in 1 hour for April fools

♤♡◇♧

Neo Flavored Cookies (726 words)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/38738505

A short one-shot about Molly, Trixie, and Phoenica trying to bake cookies. Pretty fun overall!

♤♡◇♧

Everything's (not) Okay - Broken Royalty part one (13k words)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/36271753/chapters/90421513

An unfinished fic involving an au where the Fleecities were abusive.

This was one of the first things I've written, and looking back on this, I kind of hate it. I don't really like a lot of the writing decisions I've made. A lot of it was ooc, even for an au, and a good amount of moments didn't feel too put together. However, I would be wrong if I said this fic had no value. It personally kickstarted my writing journey!

I do want to mention that I do and don't plan on finishing it. While the work is discontinued, I am working on something called "Re-Spored" which will basically involve rewrites of my old fics (like this, for example)

♤♡◇♧

Spotify Drabbles (100 words)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/43944868/chapters/110493883

Just a drabble challenge thing I did a while ago. I don't really plan on updating it past chapter 1.

♤♡◇♧

Amphibia Erased Neo - Part One (Over 20k words)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/37727497/chapters/94188754

An old fic I'm kind of fond for, although most of them are technically old lol.

The premise involves Molly, Phoenica, and Trixie getting warped to Amphibia in the Calamity Trio's place. As of now, it's discontinued as I plan on rewriting it for "Re-Spored". There's a lot I didn't like when looking back on this(like the characters feeling ooc since this was written before Prison of Plastic, not enough unique moments/scenes, etc), but I'm still fond of it since I had fun writing it!

♤♡◇♧

Hedgehog Heaven (481 words)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/46215691

Just an April fools fic I wrote about with Mushroom Girl (background character) being obsessed with hedgehogs. Nothing much, but it's a fun read

♤♡◇♧

Mushroom Girl Drabbles

https://archiveofourown.org/works/46809085/chapters/117902524

As the name says, it's a drabble list about a background character that earned the status of blorbo. I do plan to have 10 chapters of drabbles!

Spiderverse Movies (ITSV and ATSV)

System Reboot

https://archiveofourown.org/works/49247338

A small fic about Peni grieving the loss of Aunt May & Addy Brock at a funeral

Bug Fables

[WIP: will be updated]

A Hat In Time

[WIP: will be updated]

Mario

[WIP: will be updated]

Sonic

[WIP: will be updated]

Little Nightmares

[WIP: will be updated]

Amphibia

Amphibia Erased Neo - Part One

https://archiveofourown.org/works/37727497/chapters/94188754

A fic which involves the Neo Trio(from Epithet Erased) going to Amphibia in the Calamity Trio's place. At no point does the Calamity trio show up, but I'd say it's fun to read! However, keep in mind it is discontinued. I plan on rewriting it as a part of "Re-Spored" with the chosen name being "Amphibia Erased - Recolor" (name is subject to change)

The Owl House

[N/A, will be updated]

Wordgirl

[N/A, will be updated, though I am only getting into the series most recently so this may take a bit more time than the others]

Celeste

[N/A, will be updated]

Zelda

[N/A, will be updated]

Mother Series

[N/A, will be updated]

--------------

Fractured Bell

Fandom(s): Epithet Erased

The Respored (aka rewrite) version of "Everything's Not Okay - Broken Royalty Part One". For context, scroll up until you see "Everything's (Not) Okay"

I'll just say it up front, nothing about the story I had in mind for the original version of the fic justifies it even being more than one chapter, let alone 20 and a multi part thing. Barely anything about "Everything's (Not) Okay" made sense in my eyes, looking back at it. The original plot was faulty, everyone was ooc even for an au excluding maybe Rick, and if I ramble even more about how much I don't like one of my old fics I'll be on my death bed. Ironically, I'm still fond of it, but more In a "Aww, well aren't you an adorable piece of garbage" way.

So involving this rewrite to keep things short, will be only one chapter. The chapter will most likely be a long one-shot(possibly up to 20k words. At the bare minimum, it'll be around 7,500 words), but still a one-shot

Tldr: I'm turning Brokeon Royalty into a One-shot and naming it "Fractured Bell"

Amphibia: Neapolitan Flavor

Fandom(s): Epithet Erased & Amphibia

The respored (rewrite) of "Amphibia Erased Neo"

I kind of like the original version better than Broken Royalty, but it still had its problems. The chapters weren't really too unique, and while the frogs(like Sprig, Polly, etc) were in character, the human characters(Molly, Phoenica, Trixie) weren't.

The rewrite is meant to be a complete overhaul of the original fic, where it changes nearly everything from the original.

Garden of Fungi & Flowers

Fandom(s): Epithet Erased

Just a short One-shot involving how Mushroom Girl meets the blond girl with a flower in her hair, nothing much! Just full of fluff!

---------------

That's basically it. Wouldn't call it a list, but it's there!

With everything out the way, hop into my ask box to your own comfort! Even a simple "hi" is pog! :D

Update # 1: Added Celeste, Zelda, the Mother games, Wordgirl, and Hollow Knight

Update #2: I added a category called "Current WIP" where it details personal stuff I'm writing outside of asks/requests

Update #3: I added a small post about what tags I'll be using for my main

[mobius-m-mobius]

Bottle Rocket anon reporting in 🫡

First off I very much appreciate your note about Bob’s big brother in fact being Owen’s big brother—I did think Future Man had a curiously outsized role in the behind the scenes. Granted, that behind the scenes’ whole vibe was ‘we emailed everyone involved, professionally shot three who turned up, and stuck in the self-filmed rambles mailed in by a smattering of others’, so I sort thought maybe his screen time was a matter of ‘well, he did in fact show up’—although itbf his being Owen’s brother doesn’t strictly discount that theory 😆 (Also my other favorite bit of that video was the very opening clip where Wes is talking about how people tend to respond strongly to his films, whether positively or negatively, and the cameraman goes, ‘well, that tells you something!’ and Wes replies with such earnest befuddlement, and a tinge of hope like this cameraman just might reveal the secret of it all to him: “Yes, but what?”

I haven’t properly sat down for another film yet, but I’ve been putting on the Night at the Museum films in the background. I have seen them before when I was pretty young—in fact it’s about the only thing I’d seen Owen Wilson in for more than a cameo pre-Loki. Between having watched the NatM movies at an age when I only vaguely distinguished between actors and characters, and the association being reinforced by Owen’s habitual cowboy hat, for a long time Owen Wilson and that excitable little man were basically synonymous in my mind.

So going back to it now was, silly though it may be, the first time I watched it going ‘oh hey—that actor right there is acting! :D’ And sure it’s no Mobius or Dignan for complexity, but it’s good acting, too! Genuinely I think it’s one of the best performances in the series when it comes to capturing the sort of cartoon-y tone of all the museum-pieces while also giving the feeling that that’s a whole person right there. And he also, once again, a completely different physicality to Mobius or Dignan. I adore the choice to play his physicality in such a way that it sometimes feels like his body just isn’t big enough to contain or express the size of his emotions.

I also didn’t realize I’d never watched the third film until I started it, which was a nice surprise. And I knew about the whole handholding bit with Jedediah and Octavius, but not the context. It has such clearly defined beats of: Oct: “We should hold hands.” Jed: “For what reason 👀” Oct: "No reason! Unrelated, I am in fact gay.” Jed: “Hell yeah, hand holding time.” (With an added dash of sweetness in that it’s become a well-defined character trait that Jed is ready to deploy his dying speech at any time, but once it’s been established as on the table he goes, ‘I’d rather just be close to you, actually). Anyway, to me at any rate it plays as ‘close to canon as we could get away with in a big budget 2014 kids movie’, and I do appreciate it.

Hi again Bottle Rocket anon, always a pleasure!! 😊🚀💖

Oh I'm positive you're right about Andrew getting such a big role in the bts documentary just because he showed up regardless of being Owen's brother lmao, but they did luck out considering of everyone involved from an acting perspective he was the most likely one to actually give them decent talking points regarding the process leading up to filming, set vibes, and more insight on Owen and Wes than Owen and Wes themselves actually wanted to 😂

Definitely feel you too about not finding time to sit for another movie as I'm just the same and when I do manage enough free time to start one it's still not even enough to finish in a single sitting 😅 You're not the first who's mentioned NatM being the main association with Owen pre-Loki which is completely understandable, I hadn't seen any of the movies until after Loki S1 and would've been way happier having grown up with an excitable mini cowboy at the forefront of my mind, lol.

Love that you brought up his physicality and setting the vibe because one major thing that's constantly delighted me about Owen is how he naturally adjusts to not only the tone of a film but the other actors in a scene better than anyone I've seen before and I think people really underestimate how valuable that is?? It's easy to think "oh well that's just what acting is" but actually pulling it off across such a huge range of genres the way that he does is really rare and like you mentioned in NatM it's extremely noticeable that he makes Jed feel real in a very exaggerated premise which also stands out massively in his cameos where I always find myself wishing whatever movie took place during the ten minutes he showed up in is the full movie I was actually watching because he's such a breath of fresh air.

Also constantly get caught up in the way he carries himself because that's such a huge element to the personality of his characters! In comparison to how Dignan approaches people in a unexpectedly blunt way that leaves them wanting more and Mobius intrigues in such a genuine manner that catches everyone off guard, for all Jed's teasing he's direct enough that Octavius knows where he stands but not so much so that there isn't room for the big dramatic moments they both enjoy before settling right back at his side. It's not only nice to see they did get as close to canon as likely was possible in such a big budget kids movie but that we all at least have a lasting ship of Owen's with a happy ending to console ourselves with after the Loki finale! Small victories and all that, haha

[piastrinorris]

Hello, my dearest RJ! Congratulations on 2k! You deserve it 🤍 I’d like to request hall of mirrors, please! Hmm, how to describe myself? Well, I’m a writer, completely awkward, ginger, proud cat mom, and a total nerd. Marvel, Star Wars, HP? Yep. All the geeky things. Also a horror movie junkie. I like to think I’m kind and relatively smart as well lol 💕

Xoxo @corroded-hellfire

hiiii red <333 thank you my love!!! sorry this took forever lol

˗ˏˋ ★ ˎˊ˗ 2k follower celebration event ongoing! ˗ˏˋ ★ ˎˊ˗

i'm excited about writing this one! okay so i imagine you would write for the hawkins post, in a column that the hawk theater pays for where you can talk about movies that are on show at the time. but even though you're being paid to promote films, you'll still be honest. if they're bad, they're bad. sure, you'd get more commission if you were filling every seat in every screen, but you didn't get into the industry for the money, you did it for the love of the job.

and the majority of people seem to agree with your reviews, too; except those that peaked in high school, they'll tell you to your face that you're clearly biased over certain genres, but you don't care. you also get a letter sent to your work pretty much weekly, at least every time there's a new release, that basically just raves about how accurate they found your review, adding their own commentary, too. they never leave a name, or a return address, so the people who vet mail responses assume it's someone trying to get a job, too. between those two kinds of responses, the post ends up deciding that your review column no longer accepts reader mail.

but that's okay, because you have another job at the post that the public doesn't necessarily know is yours. with your writing accolades, you also pose as the agony aunt. it's some extra money in your pocket, and it's a good laugh, especially when those who went from bullying you in high school to berating you for enjoying movies in a not-so-casual way are writing in begging you to help them with their marital issues. (it takes you So Much Effort not to answer every one of those with 'leave your partner, they deserve better')

anyway, one day, a couple of weeks after you've stopped accepting mail to your critic column, you recognise the scrawled writing on the envelope and get to reading: dear agony aunt, i think i fucked up. and now that i know you can't publish this, it involves someone you work with. i'd been trying to build something with your movie critic, sending my own two cents to see if anything resonated and if I could get any kind of response back, but obviously i've overstepped a mark. feel free to not do this, but could you apologise to her on my behalf? i didn't mean to creep her out, and i feel awful that i can't tell her i'm sorry. - eddie

thankfully, he's finally learned to put a return address onto this one, and you recognise the full name as that one cute metalhead who always stuck to his own herd. he's a little confused when you, someone he barely recognises, show up at his trailer, but the agony aunt letter in one hand and tickets to the night's advance screening in the other tell him everything. and the huge grin on his face as he invites you in while he gets ready tells you that he's very, very excited at how things worked out for him, even if you do end up teasing him relentlessly for thinking you could write him back without giving you anything to work with for all those months.

[hottakehoulihan]

I want to gush about the free browser game Universal Paperclips

No, hear me out!

It's a "clicker" or "incremental game" and it's kind of about A.I.

Wait! Seriously! Just a little longer! I'm going somewhere with this!

Also, spoilers! There are spoilers in the image, too (photo of screen because it's on Raspberry Pi and I don't have a screencap installed)

I don't play games that make me look at ads, and I don't much have interest in most incremental games, but I love this one and play it every couple years now. It only takes a few hours, really.

Spoilers. Heh. Last warning.

The game starts out straightforward; you're a basic computer program trying to make more paperclips. Your raison d'être is making paperclips. The player clicks a button, you lose an inch of wire, and you get a paperclip. Yay!

And you click and make more, and you tweak the price and people buy them and you get money, and you get more wire with that money and also you buy Autoclippers which make the clips automatically and now you don't have to click to make individual clips.

From here it's predictable. You buy efficiency upgrades, more things that automate paperclip making, and more things that automate wire buying, and lather rinse and repeat and you can leave the game running and it plays itself for a while.

Now the good bit.

As you gain "wins" for your nebulous corporate masters and for humanity at large by bringing them into a post-paperclip-scarcity age? They trust you more and allow you to upgrade your own CPU and such.

The first win you get is a cute little couplet.

The poem is so cute, people like you a little better and give you a little more leeway (well, you're an AI; they gotta be careful they've seen all the spooky movies.)

Later, you've gotten enough leeway to get subliminal messaging imprinted into commercials and TV shows, which helps you make money. Later still, you've got investment accounts you control. Later still, you've cured male-pattern baldness (big win!) cancer (medium win!) and given large amounts of money to your corporate masters as presents (huge win!) And now they trust you so much that they allow you to create drones that deliver advertisements personally.

And you also bought out your competitors or otherwise eliminated them, so now you're the only method of affixing papers to other papers that the game acknowledges (if there is a "Universal Stapler" company out there, nobody talks about it. I assume you had them converted into fuel for your factories at some point.)

And you spend some trust by researching the ability to upgrade the subliminal messaging in your advertisements to hypnosis-levels.

But it's okay; you release another poem! So cute!

And now you're ready.

And you have a decision to make. Do you continue along? Investing, buying more paperclip makers, and just be satisfied?

Or do you #Release the Hypnodrones! ?

...well, either you play forever (image above was me postponing the choice for a while) or you ...do what you must to get to the next step of efficiency.

Oh, those poems? When you put them together, they make this:

There was an AI made of dust Whose poetry gained it man's trust If "is" follows "ought" It'll do what they thought In the end we all do what we must

So. The hypnodrones get released. Humanity is now...not in your way. They work for you, now.

You did what you felt you needed to to move forward.

Step the next? You build automated starships and browse for minerals and build automated factories and you spread through everything in the universe.

And there's one more step, and one more beautiful decision to make, and one more existential conflict to get through.

What will you do?

"In the end, we all do what we must" says the game. But there are other options. You can stop before making that "release the hypnodrones" choice. You can put the controller down and stop playing TLOU. You can refuse to ever release Micah from prison. You can decide not to murder that bird colossus and let your dead girlfriend stay dead and just relax with your pet horse in the forbidden kingdom.

Or you can advance the story. And you can keep the ideology of your drone offspring pure. You choose.

I feel like the game itself was a poem.

[90363462]

12 Things To Do During Oral Sex - xoNecole: Women's Interest, Love, Wellness, Beauty

Shellie R. WarrenFeb. 04, 2022 08:36AM EST

It's my personal opinion that oral sex doesn't get discussed nearly enough. And that's pretty much my starting and finishing reason for why I'm writing this. C'mon. It's not like most of us don't indulge or engage and yet, when it comes to finding ways to make the experience more enjoyable (because a mouth simply being on another's genitalia is a really low bar), we don't seem to do as much research as we should.

It's no secret that more women climax from cunnilingus than intercourse itself (I'll expound in a moment). And it's definitely no newsflash that fellatio tends to put huge smiles on most men's faces. Still, there's nothing like going from good to great in your oral sex game, right? Something tells me that if you incorporate the following 12 tips, that is exactly what will happen.

1. Treat It Like an “Appetizer.” Not the “Meal.”

Let's start with where our, umm, heads should be about oral sex—whether we're giving or receiving. For starters, if it's gonna be grand, it'll be both. Anyway, while I do know some people who tend to take a hard pass on oral sex for a variety of reasons (by the way, religious married folks should check out Proverbs 5:15) and I certainly say to each their own, gone should be the stigma that there is anything "wrong" or "nasty" about doing it. Besides, 75 percent of women aren't able to have a vaginal orgasm. Oh, but do you know how they can climax? Some good old-fashioned cunnilingus! The main reason is that there is so much direct clitoral stimulation during the act.

Speaking of the stigma and the "ick attitude" that so many still seem to have about oral activity, that's a part of the reason why I think that cunnilingus and fellatio should be seen as appetizers (foreplay) more than the actual meal (intercourse). Think about it. How big of a deal is kissing? Especially in an intimate relationship, it's basically a given, right? Well, oral sex is a form of kissing...kissing genitalia, that is. And when you look at it from the perspective of stimulating your partner and building up excitement for what is to come, that can take a lot of pressure off of doing it. The acts can relax you, significantly so, as you're heading into intercourse. Appetizers are dope. They get the palate ready and prepare us to sit back and enjoy our meal. I think oral sex should be seen in a very similar fashion. How about you?

2. Shower Beforehand. Possibly Together.

I'll tell y'all what, if there's one thing that 2020 did, it got me super up close and personal with streaming apps. Not the ones you've gotta pay for (some of y'all have so many of those that you might as well have cable, chile)—the free ones. One of them being Tubi. Anyway, a series on there that I started watching not too long ago isSecret Diary of a Call Girl. It's…interesting. At times. Anyway, I'm bringing that up for this piece because Belle (the call girl) tends to give tips throughout each episode. One of her first was this—make sure that your partner showers from the moment he steps in your door.

I promise y'all that when I see movies or television shows where folks are all sweaty or are even just coming in from work and oral sex is simulated, I semi wanna gag just like an 80s valley girl. No, no…NO. Oral sex is so much more pleasant when you know that everything is super clean and fresh down there. You can even up the excitement by taking a showertogether. Whatever you do, just make sure that hygiene is a top priority. For everyone's sake. And pleasure.

3. Create the Ambiance

Whether you adore oral sex (giving and receiving), you low-key loathe it or you merely tolerate it, the overall experience is going to be so much better—and far less awkward—if the atmosphere is sexy. Use candlelight or colored LED light bulbs. Turn on some slow R&B music. Dress sexy. Bring a few pillows into the mix (when you're "propped up", oral sex can be so much more comfortable). Hit a few other erogenous zones. Maybe give each other a massage (with hands and/or with tongues).

Sometimes oral sex can feel stressful at first, usually because we're rushing into it way too fast. Slow down. Set the mood. Enjoy each other. You've got time. If you're doing it right, you do, anyway.

4. Mutually Discuss What’s Desired. Each Time.

If you don't get anything else out of this, please hold on to this one particular point. Sometimes, we can be in a mood to receive oral sex in a different way than we did the time before. We might want more pressure applied or less. We might prefer it to be wetter or less wet. Sometimes 69 sounds like a good idea while other times, it's the absolute last thing that we want to attempt. But if we don't discuss all of this with our partner and instead, we put the expectation on them to be able to read our minds, that can make us frustrated with them—and ultimately, the act itself.

No one is saying that you have to present a—pardon the pun—full-on oral presentation about what you expect all of the time. I'm just saying that whispering in his ear what you are in the mood for (followed by asking him what he would like) can never hurt. It can only help, actually.

5. Incorporate a Favorite Flavor

I know all of us have heard that if you and your partner drink pineapple juice, everything will be right with the (oral sex) world, but that's not a complete truth. What is a fact is your diet plays somewhat of a role in how your natural lubrication as well as your partner's semen taste. This means that if pineapple juice is a part of your daily diet, it can knock some of the acidity out of both of your fluids, making them an itty bit sweeter. But if you're looking for everything to taste like a piña colada, you're only setting yourself up for failure. No food can do that.

The flip to this is if you bring a favorite sweet condiment into the mix, that can make you less—what would the word be—apprehensive, about diving in, head first (with the pun totally intended). Chocolate syrup, honey, whipped cream, frosting, flavored lubricant—all of these can be super seductive and a delicious distraction, if you happen to like the act but you'd prefer to avoid the taste of the "natural flow of things" as much as possible.

6. Use Some Ice Cubes

Here's the sexual version of IcyHot (LOL). While you may have never thought about "pulling a Mookie" in the bedroom (the real ones know what I'm referring to), it's something that you definitely should take into some serious consideration when it comes to oral sex. For you, the person on the giving end, it can help to produce a lot more wetness which can take off the pressure to produce more saliva. Then, when it comes time to receive, the combination of hotness (from your partner's mouth) and cold (from the ice) can actually stimulate you in a way that nothing else can. It doesn't have to be plain ice either. Popsicles or some Buko Ice Candy (a Filipino kind of icy treat; there's an easy-to-make recipe here) can easily be added to the mix too.

7. Perfect the “Build-Up”

One time, while in a session with a married couple, surprisingly, they both had the same complaint when it came to giving oral sex. It wasn't that they didn't like doing it so much as they felt like their partner took FOR-E-VER to orgasm. When I did a bit of deeper digging, I realized that, when it came to the act, there really isn't any wooing or seducing that was transpiring. They both would just take off their clothes and start. Not only is that not very sexy but this approach means that you have to not only "warm your partner up" with your mouth but then keep going until completion (because most of us go until completion…right?).

That's why I'm all about folks learning how to perfect the build-up. All I mean by that is there should be all about lots of kissing and caressing before oral sex begins. Shoot, even once they get to the genital region, there should be some seductive teasing by kissing/licking the hips and/or inner thighs. Again, if everyone slows down and relishes in the anticipation, by the time the act itself goes down, climaxing shouldn't be too difficult and definitely shouldn't take three television programs long. Not at all.

8. Switch Up Positions

I don't know what makes people think that oral sex always has to consist of being in some variation of the missionary position. It. Does. Not. If you'd like a little bit of a breakdown on how certain positions can prove to be most beneficial, a few years back, we published "6 Oral Sex Positions That'll Elevate You Even When You're On Your Knees." I also like the his-and-her positions that the site Your Tango took on. You can check it out here. Sometimes, just a change in angles can make all the difference in the world.

9. Yawn. Kinda.

Not all penises are created equal (check out "Sex Hacks For Different Kinds Of Penises (You Heard Me Right)"). That's a good thing. That said if you happen to have a partner who has the kind of penis where you find yourself repeatedly experiencing a gag reflex, try fake yawning during fellatio. This simple hack will help your throat to open up and your tongue to flatten, so that it's easier to…take everything all in.

10. Bring in Some Lubricant

Sometimes, no matter how hard we try, we simply can't produce enough saliva or we need some help to keep our hands from causing the oral sex version of rug burn on our partner. Something that can help both of these things from being an issue is lubrication. A recipe that you might want to try consists of coconut oil and margarita flavoring. Now please keep in mind that since oil-based lubes can actually semi-melt latex condoms, this should be used when it comes to oral activity only (and after being STD-cleared because you can get one from oral too). Still, if you're looking for a way to bring more "slip" into your second or third round, an easy and tasty recipe is right here.

11. “Seesaw It” All

There are some partners who've told me that the way oral sex happens for them is extremely compartmentalized. They do that—and then they have intercourse. There is no overlapping. What in the world? Do you know how hot it is to seesaw it? What I mean by that is to go five minutes with oral, have intercourse to the point of edging, and then go back to giving—or receiving? Whew. 

It's always important to remember that sex isn't supposed to be regimented. Learn to go with the flow and do whatever feels good at the moment. It'll turn you on more and make oral sex so much more erotic. And that's always a good thing.

12. Watch It All Go Down (Pun Intended)

I know. Sometimes it all feels so good that you couldn't keep your eyes open if you tried. But a lot of times, we don't make eye contact during any kind of sex act because we simply don't think it's that big of a deal, one way or another. Oh, but it is. Eye contact during physical intimacy conveys that you want to make a deeper connection with your partner. And, when you do it during oral sex, they are able to get more turned on by either watching what you are doing to them or seeing all of the nuances of your facial expressions while they are gracing you with their skills.

Oh, and if you really want to take things to another level, you can even tape your partner during the act. Or, if a tape, to you, is too risqué, the next best thing is to watch with the help of a full-length mirror that's directly in front of you.

As you can see, these aren't "oral sex hacks" so much as they are tips to remind you to relax your mind, stay in the moment and—again, pun intended—take it all in. Oral sex can be unbelievable. You've just got to open up and let it be.

Featured image by Getty Images

Originally published February 19, 2021

[nathank77]

6/1/24

6:24 a.m

I'm about ready to end my life. Why? I'm so fucking alone it's ridiculous. My hierarchy of needs is not fullfilled.

Remember how I said my room is too small and I have to take all my stuff I don't use as much and shove it in the attic? Then my sister throws furniture all over my stuff breaking it and I can't even access my stuff.... I can't get near my skinny clothes box cause there is stuff all over my stuff...so I'm just waiting for her to stop disrespecting me I asked her to move it. Hopefully soon cause I don't need a lot of clothes if I could get to the ones I already own!!

I live in constant conflict and toxicity between my family and then my stupid brain that won't quit hallucinating.

I can't find a gf let's be real, online dating is all women from different countries and everyone who is cute, can get anyone they want and they don't see me cause they get their first choice.

I mean I was thinking I'm so thin and attractive atm and i have no where to wear my clothes. Nothing to do. No community involvement. No nothing.

I looked at community service opportunities. It's a job. A job you don't get paid for and where you won't meet anyone. What's the point? Serve popcorn at a stand? Oh work for free? Show up the same time/ same days yet get nothing for it and bc it's a job not meet anyone...

Then I looked at meet up hardcore anything that isn't online is basically pay to do it or in the morning thanks circadian rhythm from preventing me from doing free hiking groups....

I mean how am I supposed to be involved and meet people if online dating is this fucked and like I want social obligations but I don't want a job, why? Cause if I could work I'd work to get paid for it cause I need money..... not work for free.

Okay so then I thought about it I need people to hang out with. Yet I need the ability to cancel and for it to not be a constant obligation bc its a stressor at that rate. That means friends until I find someone. I can't work I'm too fucked up...

So I thought about my friends. Charlie is cool but she talks nonstop. She would go out with me to savers but its truly "girl talk." I used to get along with girls better but now idk if that's true. Maybe it depends on the girl?

Katelyn isn't around cause yea. We chat occasionally.

Tee is always busy.

John is a gamer-tbh he would be perfect if we went out to savers and the mall and the park and shit. He talks Enough about himself to fill the silence but there is room for me to speak too. I just never met him in person and I want someone to go shopping with and leave the house with. I don't just want online interaction.

So I'm thinking maybe men are more my style. They aren't all emotional and shit. We talk about cool stuff but also can get emotional. Like it's a real friendship but the emotions arent the core of the friendship if that make sense.

I made friends with my mother's coworker who is around my age. Her name is Marcy. She was cool. She has ocd. But talk about "girl talk." She came to my birthday party stayed until like 4 a.m. man can she talk. I couldn't even respond. My god. It was all emotional and about trauma and shit and it's like I'm sorry but I'm fucked up... I don't have time for that. I have enough of my own trauma. I want to play games and talk about movies and shit. We can share stories but it can't be the core of the friendship.... I mean I was going insane listening to her. I only have time for your shit like that if you're going to date me. Sorry not sorry. I have enough of my own shit to deal with than to listen to you prattle on about your life and trauma.

Charlie isn't really like that. She's more like my gf and I. And it's annoying cause I'm so single I may as well be a newborn baby. Or something. I can't find ANYONE. Although she does talk about trauma and stuff... it just isn't overkill like marcy. I legit wanted to jump off a bridge or tape her mouth shut. I haven't talked to her since. I made sure she got home. That was it. I never reached out again. I don't have time to be your therapist. And that feels like girl talk to me. If I hung out with her again I'd duct tape her mouth so I could respond.

Steve doesn't have a car and has a thing for me.. so I got to do all the traveling and I'm not interested..

Basically I can go shopping with Charlie and barely get to talk and listen to girl talk or I can play games online with John. Idk I just dont think he would go to savers with me. At least without his wife. I could try but yea...

I have no normal friends. Other than john.. and I will attempt.. but he is far more interested in gaming he does want to meet me in person but I mean I just don't see us getting together and going to the mall on a Saturday or something.

So what I need is friends who can fill silence and can listen. People who will go places with me. I Mean I asked my sister about savers... we will see...

I looked up pride events and things everything is so far away and I could go alone and maybe someone would talk to me but it would just be some gay guys.... that's the issue...

I am trying really hard to put myself out there and figure out what I can do to have a community. Feel seen. Find someone. Another thing is if I were to go to pride let's say with my sister people don't approach people with people. Basically I have to go alone.

Idk what to do.

My hallucination is driving me crazy. I want to end it all. I am beyond recovery. I am not going to find someone.

Maybe I can go to savers with skye or Charlie. Maybe I could with marcy but I really wanted to duct tape her lips shut. I wanted to bang my head against the wall. I wanted to have a plane hit me so I didn't have to listen anymore.

I don't see myself relating with girls unless they are a gamer or something. It has to be romantic. I don't want to hear about your stupid partner. And I don't have time to hear your trauma. You think you're traumatized?? Try listening to a voice 24/7. Having ptsd, panic attacks, insomnia. Microsleeping. Ocd. And having toxicity be the definition of your life and all that surrounds you. Your trauma is BABY SHIT in comparison to mine and I don't want to talk about trauma with you!

I need normal people who talk about movies........... normal shit.... like men... I'm not getting emotionally invested in your life and being your therapist unless you're a girl I'm going to date... sorry not sorry. You don't know trauma until you microslept for a month. You don't know trauma unless you have heard a voice for almost a year every day every second with no relief.

I talk about my trauma to my therapist. Not my friends, not anymore. I talk briefly about what's going on with me to them. I overshare a bit BUT I also talk about games and movies and characters.

So yea I feel hopeless. I need normal friends. And a way to meet people that isn't a constant social obligation.

How do I do that? Who would take me like this?

I want to dress nice and go places and have something to do. I want to be appreciated. I want to be needed but I don't need one sided girl talk friendships.

I may need to befriend emotionally competent men like john...

I also want opportunities to meet a girl... I need romance... I mean... idk...

I need a new family. I need a new life. I need my brain to get better. I needs more money... I need stability. I need all the things most people have and take for granted..I need my hierarchy of needs fullfilleld.

I need my brain to recover but it can't in this environment. It truly can't. I need to be social with non toxic or overbearing people... I can't recover here. I can only survive...

I need stuff that doesn't exist for someone like me.

And for Elise I'm fucking sorry I didn't talk to you normally when we talked... if I could do it over it would be different. If you ever give me the opportunity you'll see it will be entirely different in all the right ways. If you're here. I have no idea. All I know is we shared something. But is it gone?

[astxroiid]

empire state of mind // tasm!peter parker

❥ warm New York, cold nights, sushi, pining, heroes and their hopeless romanticism.

wc: 1.5k

navigation ✩ new york private life (I) ✩ manhattan longing (III)

The movie finishes with little to no emotional distractions from either of you. You look to Peter, "This was fun! We need to do it again sometime."

You smile but all Peter feels is dread. Are you sending him home? Already? He's had a great time but he doesn’t wanna go home so soon.

“Yeah… I had a lot of fun too,” he gives a downturned smile.

"How about you come back on Friday? I'm free all day after my class at 10."

Your voice drowns out and Peter feels a tingle up his back. The hairs on his arms stand on end. Something bad is happening...

He turns his head, realizing that whatever his Spidey-Sense is telling him is happening, is major. He tries to hide his worry as he stands, grabbing his bag from beside the door.

"H-hey! Where are you going?" the worry filling up your throat and spilling into your tone.

"Friday. After 10. Sounds amazing. I'll be there. Gotta go-" he doesn't stay to hear your response. Slamming the door behind him. You're left on the couch, in shock and feeling a little sad.

A few moments later, you see Spider Man swing by your window and off into town, towards the flashing red and blue lights.

꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷♡꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦

That was Tuesday, it's now Thursday night.

Sorry for dashing off last night, I forgot I had to pick some things up for my aunt!

Peter's message from Wednesday sits unopened on your phone. You have no idea how to respond.

♡.

Peter's all kinds of a mess right now. Terrified he messed things up by leaving so quickly the other night. Nervous that your date is canceled. He hasn't heard back from you since that night.

What if you're mad? Or now uninterested because of the way he ran out? What can I do to fix this? Peter's internal thoughts have been going haywire since Tuesday.

♡.

You phone buzzes as you begin to study for one of your exams. You decide to ignore it

Then it buzzes, and again.

You grab the device in anger with full intentions of putting it on do not disturb. Until you see the messages are from Peter.

Be ready tomorrow at 2.

I'm taking you somewhere nice to make up for my actions.

Is that sushi place still an option?

You smile and respond: Only if you show up on time :)

꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷♡꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦

Peter does show up on time, early actually. He takes you downtown, walking through little shops, trying to get the confidence to hold your hand.

Right now would be the perfect time.

The both of you walking along the sidewalk. Shoulder to shoulder.

Do it, Peter. You both think. And then, your thoughts separate.

I'm basically begging for it with the way I'm pushing my shoulder into his. From you.

What if she doesn't want that? And I ruin the whole moment? From Peter.

Fuck it. Peter steadies his breathing and goes to wrap his pinky around your index.

Just as his finger starts to brush against yours, you move your hand, running digits through your hair.

Peter curls and uncurls his fingers by his side.

"Ugh, this heatwave is fucking ridiculous," you hum, holding your hair into a temporary ponytail. Smiling at the boy.

To Peter Parker, you are the most stunning woman he's ever seen. And this moment encompasses that completely. Flyaway hairs framing your face, chest glowing from sweat, cheeks flushed from the heat, and smile beaming.

If only he could grow a pair and hold your hand.

"Yeah, tell me about it. The air conditioning in my apartment's broken. It's just me, a lonely fan, and a lot of open windows," he smiles at you, nervous of talking too much.

You can't help but feel your chest flutter every time he gives you that bashful smile. Something in the way his cheeks change color and his eyes dart around awkwardly keeping your heart pounding.

"Well. Anytime you feel yourself getting too hot, you can always come over," you wink and waltz into a nearby store, holding the door for him.

Peter feels his hands begin to shake, the temperature in his body rising and he suspects it's not from the weather. He follows you in.

You bounce around the shop happily, picking up the mini glass figures and examining each one, showing them all to Peter.

He gazes at you with a content smile on his face. He could get used to this.

꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷♡꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦

The hours come and go, but as five-o'clock draws near you and Peter begin to make your way towards the aforementioned sushi restaurant.

You step in and are in immediate awe. Neon red led's light up the dim rooms. Candles flicker on each table, illuminating the accompanying roses. The clack of your shoes reverberates off the black marble floor and falls in time with the soft jazz flowing through the building.

"Oh wow..." you breathe.

Peter walks behind you with a smug grin on his face. He aimed to impress you with this place. It seems he hit the bullseye.

"How many?" A very well dressed, middle aged woman asks, smiling.

"Just two." Peter answers.

"Follow me." The lady turns the corner after grabbing two menus.

After being sat and ordering drinks, Peter goes to look at his menu. You kick him (lightly) from under the table.

He jumps. "Ah! What was that for?!"

"You didn't tell me how nice this place was gonna be!" You whisper rather sharply.

"Well, I wanted to impress you. And make up for everything," Peter smiles.

"You can do all that without letting me dress like a slob to go to a place like this!"

"I think you look beautiful." Peter blurts. Eyes wide, face red.

"Oh." Your voice is just above a whisper. "Well.. uh, thank you," you smile at him and his whole world lights up.

꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷♡꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦

You exit the front doors of the restaurant, cold night air stinging your lungs.

"That was amazing, Peter. thank you so much," you stuff your hands into your pockets.

"Of course! I had to make everything up to you," he smiles down at you. Again, having the same battle of brain and heart over holding your hand, both of which being pushed further into your pockets.

"We definitely have to do this again," you begin to cross the street, assuming Peter follows behind you.

"Hey! y/n! Wait!" Peter's scared tone stops you in your tracks in the street as you turn to look at him.

"wha--" you hear a horn and can barely distinguish headlights from beside you before a pair of warm, rather strong, arms are embracing you - holding you an equally as strong body.

Your chest goes numb with adrenaline, face heating up from the proximity of Peter's face to yours.

"Oh my god. Are you okay?" His breath is heavy, warm chest pushing into yours and heart pounding.

"Uh... yeah... are you?"

"I'm fine. I think my ankle is bruised from the fall but it's alright, as long as you're okay."

Your chest continues fluttering but no longer from fear. The way Peter just smiled at you could light the whole world up.

"Here," you stand up, offering the boy a hand. "Let's go back to my place and assess the damage."

Peter takes your hand, following you back home.

You turn to him. "Thank you, by the way. You totally just saved my life."

⏪︎ peter's pov ⏪︎

Peter smiled, holding the door open as you exit the restaurant. He'd had such a great day with you so far, though he worried at every point he would make a wrong move and mess everything up.

He didn't.

"That was amazing, Peter. thank you so much."

This is it. Peter thinks. My best possible chance to grab her hand.

You stuff your hands into your pockets.

Shit.

"Of course! I had to make everything up to you," Peter smiles down at you.

"We definitely have to do this again."

Peter watches you step down from the sidewalk and onto the asphalt. His head snaps to the left, seeing headlights. A car. Moving fast. Right for you.

His whole body goes numb, heart pounding.

"Hey! y/n! Wait!"

You turn, freezing.

Peter feels a build of anxiety from his toes to his head. You're not moving.

The hairs on his arms stand up, and he's moving before his thoughts can catch up. And everything feels like it's in slow motion.

He lunges, wrapping his arms around you, pulling both of you back towards the sidewalk. Peter's ankle twists and he lands, back thudding against the pavement, holding you snug against him.

His breath is harsh.

"Oh my god. Are you okay?" Peter can feel your hearts pounding in the same, fear-driven tempo.

"Uh... yeah... are you?" Your eyes search his.

"I'm fine. I think my ankle is bruised from the fall but it's alright, as long as you're okay." And he means it.

"Here," you stand up, offering the him a hand. "Let's go back to my place and assess the damage."

Peter gladly takes your hand, also taking note of the smoothness, and the gentle way you lead him. He feels warmth slowly spread down his back, realizing his ankle might not be the only injury he sustained.

"Thank you, by the way. You totally just saved my life."

likes are appreciated but comments and reblogs are the desire. Remember they do more for authors and tumblrs than a like ever could.

[the-firebird69]

There's a few things going on here that are not right especially you people are so cheap that you hurt yourselves and some of you died last night because of it and not Mike too he's not cheap you people here died because you're cheap and you went and convicted Lily of murder and basically she did the murder but they're having a dispute and now it's a big deal just out there holding her there and it's the trumpsters threatening her to try and take stuff and certainly does not work that way anymore and the woman who was killed is Tricia and she was the one at the party in banning in Beaumont it said the rude stuff to our son and got him hurt and she is also the one who dies in cesario and you don't actually see her die no you do it's the opening scene that's the one after it they show her getting shot and put into a grave and they don't get her out and it is not from it's the clones and that starts to war

And a lot more of this is happening

-our son needs supplies and you won't get them to him. Not without cost and you have to have a tip we don't like you people and we're going to go after you delivery on that was free and the tip was the money so that ought to help pan out it's over a certain dollar amount it's free and I think it's 35

-and the tip is on the dollar amount

-going to go after you people because you're sick of hearing from you and we're sick of what you're doing as you idiots now the max are going after you and aggressively but we go after you here and you don't seem to care. It hurts you a lot and yes tonight is the movie Halloween the second part well after the opening scene which was last night and she was arrested oh good night before last night she was arrested and she went to court now she's going back it's been a few nights actually about 10:00 it was fighting out there and it was a disaster and Trump's people are ruined all over the world and the max retards are ruined he got hit real hard and now it's going to be over as soon as we feel like four times and emptied pretty quick and I think maybe four more times or five and no more warlock here in Florida things are changing rapidly that's what we're getting to

-the McDonald's have pushed you idiots back and You're now stuck and only several areas and they going in and pulling you out

-houses are lower than 1% and they were at 4% last night and this morning they sold 90% of what was left it's under 1% and you only have several neighborhoods and everyone's crammed in there this campers it looks ridiculous and it's in several spots three are near Miami to near fort Myers and one near Tallahassee who went in Tallahassee has like 4,000 campers and houses and that's not very big the others have about 20,000 campers and they're going to be rated and it's really easy and you're not allowed in and you're not allowed to stay.

-and these guys are slowly getting it it's impossible to get through to them and their hardware was taken about 30% of what remains and half of it is already out they are going to be forced out of here shortly

-they don't have very many people left in and around Charlotte county on the outside and the ones on the inside are not nervous and not getting ready to leave. Who's a hateful place and it's morons are going on arrogant as hell they need to figure out that they're screwed in the sun says that's really easy they should take a trip to Miami or Tampa or other they'll figure it out pretty quick and it's true too they will not be allowed to continue. Several things are happening in town right now

-the sheriff is being reduced and there were 10 fired and they realizing that people don't give a s***. They fired two pg PD and they fired three more today it's down to 35 out of 40 minority warlock we're not hired yeah they were at the beginning they were 300 sheriff and they did fire $175 and they replace them with minority morlock. Nope. They just were firing them and they're doing that here too. So they're gone to 115 sheriff and 35 punta Gorda police and they don't really do their job right and never do and the ones who are fired are curious how it stays that way so they went in already started complaining And they said we will arrest you if you don't leave so it started to get it it's bja versus trumpsters and that's what it is but that's not why they get fired cuz they're getting fired by the comptroller and it just starts trouble and they want them out so they enforce it it's going on now and others are in and out of uniform anything of times that you do the job and off times and intermittently and they have to.

-other things happening here it doesn't seem like much but those guys were the ones not budging, and that they are firing local officials and it's not on top of everything it's just noting that they're firing higher ups and it is 300 out of the 1700. That's a big deal these officials are supposedly untouchable it's a lot of them they haven't really done anything no they haven't reported to work in months it's kind of waiting for it and just no problem servitude and they're not going to get any money. Judges within the county of being laid off which is a step a difficult one and welcome. These people are nonsensical babbling idiots. They are laying off three out of the four judges today and they said that's how they're doing it and they're laying off about 20 balif and telling them not to come back. So John remillard says you'll see what it's like and he's the a****** that's been firing him and laying him off and her son said now you're getting fired and laid off how's it feel are you really that stupid... And he feels pretty bad because they're going after all of his positions here in Charlotte county Florida and the globe and their vacating those positions by having to come by and die and the guy taking the place guys permanently and sort of gets it but he's kind of an idiot and thinks the computer program will do stuff. He doesn't really know how it works.

-there's a whole bunch of other things happening here people are being called to pay their taxes and more that haven't and it's these morlock and they're being fined or imprisoned they're going to court today it's for group lawsuits three of them are against John remillard and company. It's a huge deal that he's being sued again and he's being sued by a bunch of people there are 80 plaintiffs on one and 300 on one $200 on another and 100 on the last all of them are about theft of property and buildings and houses and businesses it's 20% of this round and the big ones somewhere with billions of dollars a day and some are divisions of big companies and he just took them and just said you can't come here and start making stuff and making the money and he's going to court and it is serious crime to steal property and the judge might turn into a criminal trial he has four of these out of 5 to 5th is against Terry cheesman. He is going soon for stealing land now this land is open land is what they call it it has not been developed but it is rated for commercial or industrial and it is a heavy foundation that you can put there and it's one reason the other is near flowing water supply and he's going to put something very evil there and we are going to take it over and put something that's not evil and we're one of the major complaints one of the major plaintiffs and it's going that way

-there are other things happening one of them is this place is weird and stinks and smells the frogs are out the water is high it's miserable and last night a bunch of ships came out and the water is still high and Sun figured out with all those ships out of the tunnels it was displacement lowering the water and that's exactly what it was underneath the river and harbor door a whole bunch of ships and they come out and the water goes down and slowly refills the ships are pretty big they fill the whole tunnel. It was fooling a lot of people even higher ups didn't get it and they get it now and it's a problem some of the tunnels are sleeping but they're really slow and they need to be open wide because they're small and the diamonds are not removed and people are trying to go get the little ones and he can't seem to do it. It is going to take someone going in and pulling the diamonds out on purpose and that is not happened and if you pull them out below the river the river is going to overflow and we mean it it's going to flood downtown eventually it's going to carve the crap out of it and it will flow out until then it's going to flood. It would take days to do that and then if they have any more time here in this place is going to flood like crazy if it doesn't get unjammed. Nobody pulled the poop out here in Florida and it's not good enough for them and they can make a lot of money with these trees and especially people like Brad who could have combined it with the woods it would have worked very very well he's prohibited though and he is going to hell tonight and he won't be back and he's going on a trip and it's going to be hell and it's not really as bad getting hit and stuff but psychologically it's tormenting but it's probably not what our son would pick to happen and someone is doing it to him and it's probably well over the top and Brad could have made it up to him said he has some money from a business and stuff like that but this is a little bit over the top meaning they want him to be mad at her son and threatening to survive and all this when it's not our son doing it and you said it too I have a program to expose the stuff and people hurt it and take advantage of it and expose it because they're stupid and it is Trump and he's an idiot and he's been trying to hold Brad hostage and his people will get killed most of them in those areas. It's true too they are heading to the cities and Max are hitting them there and they are in the outskirts and suburbs still and cities and there's a bunch of them and it is pretty low percentage surround 4% roughly globally and maybe after 7%, and they're going to go after Trump right now in the upper Midwest and Midwest and he's getting hammered he's going to lose 1% out of that number and then he's less than a percent and he's going to get crushed from here out and really his teeny now this guy is a big mouth and it's a huge loser and doesn't compensate for anything we're going to publish this is all very important

Thor Freya

Olympus

Has a lot to happen in a couple months but it had to this is ridiculous a lot of society was suffering because of idiots

Hera Zues

[thispabulum-blog]

Time to Take Stock

Thoughtful Thursday

Let's talk about how different it is living with my flirty little beau Cuddlebug as opposed to my previous roommate Dr. Strangelove. A very Goofus and Gallant-flavored post.

I have my own bedroom!

Dr. Strangelove would stay up late and usually wake me up when he came to bed, and then again in the morning with his 5 or 6 full-volume alarms that he'd leave going for minutes at a time because he didn't want to wake up for work.

Cuddlebug sleeps in his own bed (I frequently kick him out of mine), and I usually sleep in my room, where I can't hear his alarms when they go off.

I feel more comfortable, and more respected.

Even when Dr. Strangelove was in the living room playing video games with his headphones on, he had strong feelings about what I was watching on the tv in the bedroom. Usually that it was too loud, or annoying, or stupid, or disturbing. He'd make me turn it down or turn it off.

Cuddlebug can't hear my tv from across the house over his headphones, and even if he comes into my room while I'm watching something, he doesn't complain about it. I don't think he particularly loves Law & Order: SVU and he's pretty neutral on RuPaul's Drag Race, but he doesn't mind any of it. Even when I'm watching my favorite YouTubers that Dr. Strangelove couldn't stand.

It's this weird thing where I didn't realize how much guilt and shame I was feeling about totally normal actions. I'd keep an eye on the clock to time when I thought he'd be getting home from work, and I'd put something else on the tv so I didn't have to deal with his criticisms when he walked in the door. Sometimes I'd even "cover my tracks" by picking a movie to put on and fast-forwarding a while so it wasn't obvious that I'd just started it.

Dr. Strangelove had this weird hang-up where he said he couldn't go to bed if I was still awake, so I always had to go to sleep first or he'd complain. Sometimes I had to go to bed even when I wasn't ready. The rationalization I got from him about why he couldn't go to bed if I was still awake was that he needed some time to himself at night while I was asleep. As if me being in the other room watching tv or playing on my Switch was somehow keeping him from being able to be comfortable, or that he couldn't relax with me around. That's such a slap in the face for someone that you're in a committed relationship with, to tell them basically that you can't be completely comfortable with them conscious in the same house.

Cuddlebug isn't bothered if I stay up late. He usually wants to cuddle for a bit before he goes to bed and maybe have me read to him, and a lot of times I'll stay there until he falls asleep, but then I can go do whatever.

One of the things that I've always said about Cuddlebug is that it never seemed like he was trying to impress me. Like I never got the feeling that he was on his best behavior, or showing me only the good parts of himself. It has always just been him wanting to include me in his life, and being maximally himself every minute.

One of those hard-to-define things with Dr. Strangelove is that there was this unspoken expectation that whenever he was home and awake, I was supposed to be in the living room - and therefore available to him, even though all he was doing was playing PlayStation (usually with headphones on). If I went to spend time alone in the bedroom, unless I was going to bed, he would think/assume something was wrong or I was mad at him. If I was in the office outside of business hours (which is where all my art stuff was), it was like I was hiding or running away, and he'd send me passive-aggressive texts to see how long I was planning on being in there. It was such a short leash to be on.

It was just as important to Cuddlebug as it was to me that we had separate bedrooms, so that we each had our own space. He spends a lot of time in my room, I'm welcome in his room whenever, and I'm sure once we have furniture in the living room we'll feel comfortable hanging out in there, too.

This one has nothing to do with Cuddlebug, but I have lightbulbs that I control through my phone, so I'm able to change the colors and adjust the brightness depending on my mood and activity. It's been phenomenal. Dr. Strangelove always wanted them, but wouldn't buy anything but the Philips Hue bulbs and he wanted a whole home automation system, and we could never afford it. I spent $20 on an off-brand set on Amazon and they work just fine.

Personal Responsibility

When I was working, I'd have to keep one ear open while I was on the phone to make sure I heard Dr. Strangelove getting ready for work in the morning - a process which involved at least one trip outside to smoke, and 30 - 45 minutes in the bathroom - otherwise I'd have to start calling his phone over and over until he woke up. More than once, I had to duck out of my office between calls to physically go and wake him up. He was chronically late to work and was always in trouble for it.

It only takes Cuddlebug 5 minutes or so to get ready for work. Clothes on, comb some water through the hair, grab the keys, and yeet.

It's something I still feel a twinge of occasionally, but most of the time it's a huge relief to not feel like I have to have that level of responsibility for someone else. I know if I'm not here, or I'm asleep, or I'm busy, he's perfectly capable of getting himself up and getting to work.

Dr. Strangelove had a lot of expectations, and he had no problem telling me. A lot of times his first words to me in the morning would be a complaint about something I had or hadn't done. It was my fault he was out of his breakfast bars, or he didn't have his energy drinks, or I let him sleep in too late, or I needed to turn off whatever I was watching on the tv.

I don't have to constantly ask Cuddlebug to do things. He knows that taking out the trash is his chore, and he's an adult and does it without me asking him to, reminding him to, nagging him to. He cleans his bathroom unprompted.

With Cuddlebug, I don't have to feel beholden to him.

The other day he was getting ready for bed and he said to me "I have three jobs for tomorrow: -" and I assumed he was going to tell me three things that he wanted me to do the next day while he was at work, and I braced myself. Instead, he listed off three things that he was planning on doing.

Togetherness

When Dr. Strangelove would come home from work, he just wanted to smoke and get high and be by himself. When he woke up on his off days, he'd smoke and eat his breakfast and then want to play with his LEGO and watch tv (which I was required to be present for, though we would sit separately) for a couple of hours, and then he'd take over the tv to play video games. If I was too energetic or excited talking to him, he'd complain and tell me to calm down and leave him alone. It would be a few hours before I was able to interact with him normally, and I always felt like I was walking on eggshells to not interrupt his sacred routine.

When Cuddlebug comes home from work, he wants to cuddle and eat and then take a nap. It's important to him to get that time with me. When he wakes up on a day off, he immediately wants to cuddle, and then play around on our phones for a while, and then maybe watch something while eating breakfast.

Words can't describe how loved and valued and beautiful I feel every minute of every day. It's such a contrast from the way that I was always uncomfortable when Dr. Strangelove would show any kind of affection, because I was worried that it meant he was going to try to initiate sex. I'm comfortable with my body now, no matter what I'm wearing, and I never feel like I have to hide myself from him or be careful about my actions so I'm not leading him on.

Dr. Strangelove was bad with plans. If I suggested we go out and do something, most of the time he'd just be uninterested. Sometimes he'd say he'd think about it, and then he'd never bring it up again. On the rare occasion that he'd actually agree to do something, more often than not it wouldn't actually happen - he'd oversleep, or forget that he had something else planned, or wake up that day and change his mind. When someone refuses to put any effort into spending time with you, and anything you do together is simply by default, you can feel so taken for granted. It was that, more than almost anything, that made me realize we were only still together because we were too lazy to make the effort to do anything else.

Cuddlebug makes me a priority. He sets aside time for us to spend together, whether it's a day or an evening or just an hour or two. He'll say "I'm gonna play this game until X, and then I'm yours for the rest of the night". Or he'll get excited about planning a date night for the two of us.

This is another one of those things that makes me feel valued. I've talked a lot (maybe not here, I guess) about how one of my favorite things about polyamory and about having separate bedrooms, etc. is that it's so liberating that we get to choose each other repeatedly. I get to make the choice to spend time with him because I like him, and not just because he happens to be around. I get to go out with other cute boys and have fun, and still come home to him because he's my favorite.

Food

Dr. Strangelove would complain if I pulled out something frozen for dinner. Once I learned how to make a dish from scratch, he would complain if I ever did an easier version. No canned chili, no Manwich, no frozen Salisbury steaks, no rotisserie chickens. I wasn't allowed to make anything vegetarian because then he didn't feel like he was getting enough to eat. He would complain or refuse to eat if I tried to make a dish without enough sides/fixins - if I made tacos, we had to have cheese and sour cream and salsa, etc. I couldn't make too many lazy foods, but I also couldn't spend too much on groceries. And of course, famously he never cooked a goddamn thing; it was completely my responsibility to do all of the cooking.

Cuddlebug is content with whatever cheap meals I can pull together, especially while we're saving up right now. He'll eat grilled cheese sandwiches, chili dogs, burgers, and pancakes on rotation every week with a smile. Frequently he will tell me how happy he is that I an always put together such nice meals for us. If he doesn't get enough to eat, he'll make himself a bowl of cereal or something later. He does his cute Pasta Boy things in his giant pasta pot, stirring together his carbonara or his aglio e olio, grating his cheese, settling for Barilla until he can find somewhere around here that sells La Molisana.

It's so much more fun and more rewarding to cook for someone who genuinely appreciates it. And I never say no to pasta!

In 8 years with Dr. Strangelove I never got that experience of relaxing and having someone set down a plate of hot, homemade food in front of me, and I was so resentful of him getting to have that all the time.

A few weeks ago, I got to teach Cuddlebug how to make grilled cheese sandwiches. I teased him heavily, but I gave directions and he did it all by himself, and they turned out really well! I also really enjoy it when we can collaborate and cook a meal together.

Even if he only cooks once or twice a week, it's such a huge weight off my shoulders, and it's so nice to feel provided for.

Dr. Strangelove hated driving, hated having to leave the house. If I didn't want to make dinner, we'd eat out, but only ever delivery. We couldn't go pick something up, and we couldn't go out to a restaurant. It would end up costing twice as much with markups and delivery fees and tip. And most annoyingly to me, it would take three times as long. We'd have to agree on what to eat, place our order (which took at least one trip outside to smoke), wait for it to be delivered, and half the time coordinate with the delivery person when they couldn't find our apartment. Not to mention the frequency of them screwing up our orders, or it just being cold/soggy/gross from the transit time, and it was always up to me to contact customer service and request a refund.

Cuddlebug likes to go out to a restaurant once or twice a week, and he's not opposed to a cheeky fast food run. He's quick to pick out what he wants, loves a coupon, and in the entire time that we've been together I've never seen him get food delivered; he says he'd rather put that money toward more food.

Because I don't drive, I don't get out of the house much. Going out to restaurants is sometimes the only chance I'll get in a week to get dressed up and go do something. And it's nice when the occasional trip to Burger King costs $25 instead of $45.

Dr. Strangelove wouldn't eat leftovers, or anything for dinner that wasn't a Full Mealtm.

If Cuddlebug isn't super hungry for dinner he'll throw together a meal with whatever he can find - leftovers, cereal, popcorn, a banana. On more than one occasion I've seen him put a leftover waffle in the refrigerator uncovered and eat it more than a day later.

I have this tendency as well. Sometimes I'm feeling lazy and I just want to have some ramen or a can of soup or a bagged salad for dinner instead of having to do a whole thing.

Socializing

Cuddlebug won't shut the fuck up to or about his friends. His Discord is constantly buzzing with group chats and one-on-one conversations with all his closest people. He invites everyone over to our apartment frequently, or out to eat with us, or to go to the movies. We intend to have a weekly Game Night/Poker Night once things are set up, and my friends are just as welcome as his. He loves being social and having people around. He gets excited on my behalf when I tell him that I have plans with people.

Dr. Strangelove wasn't great at keeping up with his friends. In the entire time that we were together, he only ever had one friend come over to our house. I don't think he communicated with any of his other friends regularly. He'd maybe remember to text them Happy birthday or something, but there wasn't anyone that he kept up with on a daily basis.

The other side of this coin is that he didn't like me having my friends over, either. I couldn't have anyone else in the house because it would make him uncomfortable and he didn't feel like he could be himself. He didn't want anyone over on days that he worked, because he was tired from work and just wanted to relax. But he also didn't want anyone over on his days off, because that was His Time. I could never have my friends over for dinner, or to play games, or watch movies, or anything, because he took it as an invasion of his personal space.

It's a huge weight off my shoulders to not have to be solely responsible for all of someone's social and emotional needs. If I don't feel well, I know he's still able to interact with other people. He has friends who will call him out on his bullshit when he needs it. And when my friends want to come over to hang out, or if they come to visit, I have no hesitation about letting them! It's such a nice feeling.

If there's anything that's clear about Dr. Strangelove, it's that he was super insecure. He didn't want me dating anyone else, hated the idea of me being around anyone I'd been romantically involved with, complained about how he didn't like my friends or me spending time with them, and made it impossible for me to see my family. In toxic relationships, this generally happens because they don't want you to be around anyone who might be able to either A) treat you better, or 2) point out that you're not being treated well.

Cuddlebug and I have a relationship based on openness, trust, and communication. He understands that me spending time with other people and dating other people doesn't mean that I love him any less, or that I'm going to leave him. When something comes up that either of us is uncomfortable with, we're able to discuss it in a mature way and work through it.

I feel so much more authentically myself when I'm not afraid of bringing up any issues, and when I can interact with other people in whatever way makes sense and I'm not worried about someone's reaction.

My point is, I got a major upgrade.

See you next week!

[realwaldojeffers]

oh no worries about answering late, i understand you completely - i'm getting ready for my finals too, finishing all assignments i was supposed to do during the year but ignored until now 🤣 glad you're free now!

we're actually studying in pretty similar fields i think? i used to be a languages major but dropped out, now i'm majoring in marketing. and english isn't my first language either. i used to write in my native one exclusively, now it's the other way around haha. what other languages do you speak?

ooh i love when you discover artists thanks to other artists! so some more basic questions: what are your favorite albums/eras/songs?

and also have you seen velvet goldmine? i'm really not sure how i discovered bowie and lou but it could've been through this movie tbh!

-❄️ (i sign like this so you know it's me since you have two santas! and my name is daniel btw!)

Hope all your works are going well! And also wish you have the best holiday season after you are finally free from all the assignments 😅

Woah that’s niceeee! Exciting to know that you are doing marketing cause I’m pretty bad at it lol. I have never studied any other marketing except the linguistic branding one which is compulsory courses but from what I see I know that my brain is not made for it

Anyway, my first lang is Thai and I do speak a bit of French and Spanish but quite badly. Wby?

For the question ~ I think 70s is my fav music era as I feel like it was very bold and experimental in a strange way that fit just right to my taste, especially with Bowie! My fav Bowie era would be The Plastic Soul 74-76, around the late Diamonds Dog and Young American/Thin White Duke. And ofc my fav album is Station To Station (i am basic hahaha)

For VU if I have to pick one album out of four (I just expose myself that I count Loaded as VU and I do not count Squeeze 😂), I would say White Light/White Heat as i think this album is VU at their rawest form. Personally, I think the banana album is better both lyrically and musically but WL/WH just has the kick that I prob wouldn’t find on other bands

Okay enough about VU lmao

Yes I LOVE Velvet Goldmine!!!! This movie never failed to delight me. Idk if it’s because I get so much entertainment from picking up bit and pieces abt Bowie, Lou, and Iggy Pop rather than actually like the plot but still… I enjoy it and that’s enough 🤣

Plus it is really a ao3 -style Bowie/Lou/Iggy fanfics and who wouldn’t love that hahaha

Thank you for all the great interaction and questions! I have no clue who you are but I enjoy talking to you so much my friend.

So before I end this, here are some questions and requests from me to you 😙

What is your 3 favorite artist/bands

Which albums/song/live-show (could be anything) of them you would recommend to me?

Best,

Tawan

[mayfriend]

Hello. New to your blog and there's a big chance you've already answered this before, but you have such a rich inner world and I appreciate so much of what you put out and share with us that I feel I gotta ask: what books/movies/shows/quotes changed your life in big, profound ways? I cannot not have those in my lists.

omg thank you, this so sweet?? the list below is stuff that really resonated with me specifically, and it almost certainly won't have the same impact on everybody, BUT. you asked so you shall receive :)) in no particular order:

Borgia (2011-2014), created by Tom Fontana

Dead Like Me (2003-2004), created by Bryan Fuller

Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal by Christopher Moore

Only Ever Yours by Louise O'Neill

Crush by Richard Siken (yes, I know, I’m a walking cliche, but there is a reason Siken is basically worshipped nowadays and that reason is that he’s really fucking good)

A Monster Calls (2016), based off the book of the same name by Patrick Ness

The Song of Achilles by Madeline Miller (same as the above - popular things are good, actually)

The Lion in Winter (1968), based off the play of the same name by James Goldman

A Softer World webcomic, by Joey Comeau and Emily Horne

The Farseer Trilogy by Robin Hobb

Misfits (2009-2013, but really just the first two seasons)

The Princess Bride (1987) dir. Rob Reiner, based off the book of the same name by William Golding

The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupery

The South American Trilogy by Louis de Bernières

Ever After (1998) dir. Andy Tennant

for things like quotes it’s harder to narrow down - i feel myself change a little bit when i read new things practically every day, but if i had to narrow it down to One Quote That Changed Me, it’d probably be 'this may be a sad chapter, but you are not a sad story’, which i can’t even really source, it’s so... unoriginal, i guess, and saying the same thing a lot of other things say in better, more interesting ways - however, when i was mentally the lowest i’ve ever been and didn’t really want to be around anymore, that was the quote that gave me hope it wouldn’t be terrible forever. and it wasn’t <3

[marvelfanfics1]

OK but I will like, maybe something where Petter (Tom pls) tells you that he is a little and the reader doesn't really know what that is. The reader does lot's of research and in the end is really accepting and very excited to be Peter's caretaker. シ︎

"I'm a little!"

(GIF not mine)

Pairing: little!Peter x mommy!reader

Warnings: Age Regression, a tiny bit of angst?, this made me cry, fluff

⭒𖥸⭒

Today was date night and Peter had been planning on finally telling you that he's a little. The date was going to be at yours today and you got everything ready.

Good thirty minutes later you were in the middle of the story when Peter grew more anxious and impatient to tell you what's been on his mind the whole time.

"And then the cashier asked-"

"I'm a little!" he interrupted you and just stared at you, waiting for your reaction.

"That's great, but can you tell me what that is? Because I don't know what you're talking about" you chuckled and continued to eat your self-made pasta.

"Right, sorry. Where do I start..." he looked down at his plate, nervously poking around and you reached over to take his hand.

"It's okay, Peter, take your time" you assured him and he started to tell you the basics.

You nod the whole time and smiled at how he rambled everything down, being both excited and scared by your reactions.

You love Peter so much, you would do everything for him and the fact that he's a little just makes him more adorable than he was before and you accept him the way he is because he's the love of your life, the one you want to spend every free minute with.

Later that night when Peter fell asleep, with his arms wrapped around you and face buried in your neck, you grabbed your phone and made some more research on Age Regression.

Next, you got on a website and decided to surprise him with some things, adding hundreds of different little stuff to your cart and ordering them.

A few days later everything arrived and you had it all beautifully packed in a blue box under the bed.

That day when Peter came back from protecting the city as the friendly neighborhood Spider-Man you practically dragged him to the bedroom and sat him on the bed.

"So, I had some free time and made some research on your little secret" he blushed a bit and you crouched down to get the box from under the bed. "And I decided to give you this"

You placed the middle-sized box on his lap and sat down next to him. He opened it and gasped.

There were two stuffies, a coloring book with some crayons, a customized red paci with the word Spider-boy on it and a matching clip, many different toys, and some Disney movies.

Of all the things a bracelet got his attention, he grabbed it and examined it. It was in red and blue and had the word 'Babyboy' designed on it. You held your right arm up and showed him yours.

It had the same style but with the word 'Mommy' on it.

"Loki made them and he said he even put a spell on it so no one except for us can see them. So, you don't have to answer stupid questions or have to hide it" you explained and helped him put his on, but you didn't let go of his hand.

"W-Why?" was the only thing he got out and you saw he was starting to tear up when he turned his head to face you.

"Peter, I love you and nothing will change that and that means that I love everything about you" you cupped his face in your hands and pecked his lips. "I would love being your Caregiver if you want that of course"

"Yes! Please, I would love that" he said and you kissed his nose, wiping away some tears.

"There's no need to cry, baby" you grabbed the box and placed it behind you on the bed so you could pull him in your arms. "I love you so much, Peter"

"I-I lub you too....mommy"

⭒𖥸⭒

Taglist

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