ponyboy having teenage boy angst because kat is inconsolable on a school night, fussing and crying and soda is walking around the house calming her down and the floor is creaking and irritating pony. RAHHH THIS AU IS TAKING OVER MY LIFE TOO!!
HEHEH IM SO GLAD I CAN SPREAD THE INSANITY!!!! it’s taken me over
pony would have already been so tired, school is stressful and he needs to keep up his grades cause darry is on his ass and he wants to be the one to make it out of tulsa!! plus his brother sleeps in kats nursery/his and cherrys room and that’s stressful as fuck for him and he doesn’t sleep as much as he used to without him
so bro gets home and just collapses into bed and is trying to sleep just for kat to be WAILINGGGGGG all night, soda is just as stressed trying to get her to sleep, he feels guilty that he cant get her quiet so everyone can’t sleep, and he can’t even comfort his daughter. so he’s just pacing trying to get her to calm down and the floors are creaking and she’s still crying and it goes on for HOURS
meanwhile little mr teen angst ponyboy just comes out of his room and just yellssssssss at soda cause he is so tired and can’t process his emotions and soda just starts crying tbh he is so tired and doesn’t know how to comfort his baby or his brother. pony immediately feels guilty and goes and hides in his room the rest of the night and the next day 😭 eventually they actually talk and apologize to each other. pony would be so magically good at getting kat to fall asleep for no reason tho
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What's interesting about witnessing the shift in Tom and Shiv's relationship, is that for the first 3 seasons Shiv got to live in comfort of being her father in the relationship. She was in control. She was the emotionally detached one, keeping Tom at a distance from her inner vulnerable self like her father does to her and her siblings, despite Tom always appealing to that side of her, bearing himself and wanting that intimacy. She held all the power, and in holding all the power she felt secure that she wasn't going to be screwed over (like her dad did to her mum) and abandoned (like she felt her mum did to her). She could escape the fucked up divorce her parents had by being the embodiment of power (her father),,, which, like a lot of children of a messy divorce, she wanted to avoid such a thing for herself at all cost, and pride herself on her marriage and choice of partner instead of getting help for the trauma and damage she'd carried since childhood. Shiv was safe. She was secure. Like her dad, she had her own dog to kick to test its loyalty and feel secure and reassured every time that dog came back to her side.
But then the dog did bite back. Tom did betray her. The man she viewed as beneath her, all worshipping, and in her eyes nowhere near as smart as her, outplayed her and betrayed her and won over the approval of the very man that she'd been emulating. And now she's not her father. She's the last person she ever wanted to be. She's her mother. She's the one on the receiving end of Logan through Tom, making the divorce messy and difficult and painful by using the same tactics he did with her mother, something that gets to her easily and makes her extremely upset to the point where she's verging on tears. Tom is the one at Waystar + ATN. Tom is the one saying "uh huh." To her.
She thought that she could escape her mother's fate by being her father. By being cold and distant and emotionally closed off. By being the one who kicked the dog. She let her trauma and fears rule and guide her into making decisions and behaving in harmful ways (to Tom and herself) that she thought would protect her and never let her be hurt. And none of it worked. Because despite it all, she became her mother.
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Oh man thank you for the Drayton angst HHH my heart goes out for him. Like from what I've seen, a lot of people just take his slacker / laziness at face value but from the bits of dialogue, you have room to imagine there's more to this kid.
Hassel advising him to avoid desperately trying to live up to the expectations of others. Drayton being strong enough that Geeta, the Champion of another region was considering in scouting him. He wouldn't have become the BB League Champion without a lot of effort put into it, not in a battle oriented academy. If he was a slacker from the beginning, realistically he wouldn't have made his way to the ranks until he beat the reigning Champion.
There's just a lot of inconsistencies with how Drayton presents himself vs how others view him. Various NPCs expressed their distaste of Drayton but most of them are consistent in saying that his one seemingly good trait is that he's a strong Trainer. It's hard to picture a talented kid like him repeating three years without some kind of cause.
My personal headcanon is that Drayton has that kind of negative perception from the students because of how he acted. One of the strongest Trainers in the academy, coming from a respected family and yet repeated multiple years? Not putting in effort? It feels like a slap to the face of those who worked hard to get where they are. Why is this guy still here if he's not going to try?
Perhaps it's the realization that he can never measure up to his talented family. Drayden being a respected Gym Leader, Iris being the actual Champion of the region--how can he compete? What can he say to those that often compare him with them? Especially during his teenage years, it's not difficult to picture that at some point, he simply gave up. Didn't bother trying for something that might just be a waste of effort in the end.
I have other thoughts I'll share in a different ask as this one has gotten rambly as it is haha
Oughghfhfhfhf your honour this is so fucking real hcnxbxn
Cause being from a family like that and being constantly compared to them would fuck up a mfer man I can vouch for that, and it's just chdmdb it's the fact y'know that there really is that awkward air in his conversations w Hassle and Geeta, like talking abt his family is a sore spot for him but he just hides it well enough that people would just think oh bc he's lazy he doesn't want the responsibilities his family has going on too, especially w how well known his family was in Unova and possibly to Dragon Specialists from other regions, given how Drayden even knows Hassle
It didn't help his sis is the Champion too, it's worse when they compare him to her
And it all leads down to the thought y'know, that he really made an effort when he was younger, but still couldn't live up to the standards of his family, that being a trainer and a strong battler is all he is, and w how Dragon Masters are, I know it takes more than strength to truly be one; especially w how the Blackthorn elder treated Clair too, I imagine it's a similar situation w Drayton. He's a strong trainer, Champion level, but he's just lacking something; that something is now a thing he'd rather not try to find out, cause in his mind even if he did, it'll never be enough, he'd still fall short, so why bother anymore right? His family can have all the titles and recognition that they want, he'd just be there vibing w his friends, least they don't compare him to his family much
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