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finchwrites · 3 months

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Wip Questionnaire!

a tag from @kaylinalexanderbooks (go check hers out here!)

(and thank you for the nudge! this was very fun and helped me think about my wips in a new way)

Rules: answer as few or as many as you like!

1. What was the first part of your wip that you created?

Urban Fantasy/paranormal wip The Rubicon - the very first things I created were Carmen and Chase. I doodled them in the sides of my notebooks in my sophomore year of high school. Carmen used to be the protagonist of the story! A lot has changed since then, but I had characters way before I had a setting or a plot or anything else. High Fantasy wip The Stewniverse - this one is a little harder to answer! The first thing I made was Stewie, my cheerful hero of a knight. I drew him in his armor in class. But this story is a collaborative effort between me and my partner, and the first thing that existed was a pinterest board for Kieran, who my partner made up with the original intention of playing him in a DND game. So, characters, again. Urban Fantasy/paranormal wip The Lilywood Chronicles - I sort of started with characters for this one, too, but in the sense that I was creating family histories for the founding of the town! I made lists of families and how they developed over the years, and then I plugged almost all of that into a family history website to create a family tree.

2. If your story was a TV show, what would the theme song/intro be?

I always gravitated towards instrumental songs that were either chosen or written for shows, but I have this secret hope that I would get to write the song myself, especially as someone that’s been slowly working on writing little themes for each of the characters in my fantasy wip, as well as having already made a tentative theme for Lilywood.

3. Who are your favourite characters you've made? Why?

I have a hard time picking favorites because I put so much of myself into all of my characters, but I think that the ones I like most are Elliot from the Rubicon and Jamie from the Lilywood Chronicles. It’s difficult to talk about, but I poured so much of my dissociative disorder into these two characters in a way that means a lot to me, even before I knew that I was doing it. With these two characters, I have a really great chance to talk about what having a dissociative disorder has been like in different ways. That 1) can help educate people on what it looks like but also 2) can be a source of representation for a highly stigmatized and misrepresented disorder (DID). It’s something that means a lot to me, and I hope will mean a lot to others.

4. What other pieces of media do you think would share a fan base for your story?

The Rubicon - people who like shows like Lost Girl, Shadowhunters, Once Upon a Time really feel to me like they’d like the Rubicon, haha. It’s not really the same kind of urban fantasy, Rubicon is just ghosts, but I still kind of feel like they’d get into it! The Stewniverse - I feel like people who really like Galavant would really like this. I have this hope that the LOTR crowd would vibe with the Stewniverse (linguists making high fantasy stories and all that) but I don’t have nearly enough worldbuilding yet for it to be even comparable. But the high fantasy crowd that’s also looking for good queer storytelling. The Lilywood Chronicles - The first thing that comes to mind is Lockwood & Co? I think that show has some similar vibes to what is going on in Lilywood.

5. What has been your biggest struggle with your wip?

The Rubicon - the worst part has been how long it took me to find the plot. I started this idea in 2012, and I didn’t have a solid idea of what the plot or flow of the story was until uhhh 2023. I had spent so much time thinking about Carmen as the protagonist and I kept getting stuck until I realized it was supposed to have been Peter all along. The Stewniverse - it is, once again, plot. This wip has a loose plot, but it’s all of the inbetween steps that I’m not sure about. There are also a ton of moving parts. I know there are bigger casts of characters than six, but I’m having trouble pacing the arcs for each character and each important relationship alongside what should be happening with the plot… which I also still haven’t figured out!!! The Lilywood Chronicles - The hardest part of this wip right now is struggling to tell who is the protagonist, or if all three of my main characters are protagonists. There are so many things happening alongside the main story, and I still haven’t figured out how to even begin writing this. It has a plot. It’s episodic. I don’t know who’s telling the story but it can’t be all of them because there are Big Secrets that prevent at least one character from being a narrator. I don’t have a direction to start in, and I think that’s probably because it started out as a tabletop rpg campaign.

6. Are there any animals in your story? Talk about them!

Most prominently, the horses in my high fantasy wip!! Stewie helped deliver a foal when he was around 12 and they became very closely bonded - this is Ser Decadence! He’s a loyal, reliable, sweet, beautiful draught horse that is probably the closest thing to what I would call Stewie’s Soulmate. They are the best of friends. The other horses are also important, but none so much so as Ser Decadence. Their names are Lady Filigree and Carrots. Honorable mention for Ashe, who is not an animal but a shapeshifting kelpie who probably spends as much time as a horse as he does in his “human” form.

7. How do your characters get around? (ex: trains, horses, cars, dragons, etc.)

In the Rubicon, mostly via car! It’s a city in the South without real public transportation so driving is a must. In the Stewniverse, horses horses horses! In the Lilywood Chronicles, almost entirely walking around. It takes some time. But this sounds like a bit of a boring answer and I might think more about that.

8. What part of your wip are you working on rn?

The Rubicon - a first draft. I did half of hte 50k in 2023 NaNoWriMo, but I didn’t like how it was turning out, and I might start over. I’ve spent so long writing drafts for this story but I’ve never finished one. Stewniverse - worldbuilding and most importantly, conlanging! I’m mapping out the land and I’m designing a couple of the fantasy languages, which is super fun but also requires so much thought and work. I’ve got tentative phonemic inventories for two languages, but I’m almost a little afraid to start working on the syntax, haha. Morphology is also. a lot. I’ve also been working out the kinks in the magic system. The Lilywood Chronicles - I’ve mostly been thinking about character relationships and interactive histories between different characters in the series. There are a lot of players and they all have opinions. I need to figure out how they fit in and where. I need to work a lot on the magic system in this wip, too, because it started out as a tabletop game and I need to really think about it and make it into something that better fits the world as a novel.

9. What aspects (tropes, maybe?) of your wip do you think will draw people in?

I think, mostly, the focus on recovery and growth. My characters all have so many problems, but they want to get better, even if they’re not going about it in the right way. Also, found family!! There’s so much found family in all of these wips, but especially in the Stewniverse and in the Lilywood Chronicles. Plus, you know, tons of queer representation! I’m also hopeful that people will like my magic systems. The one in the Stewniverse means a lot to me!

10. What are your hopes for your wip?

I want people to connect with them! I want people to be able to feel the feelings I put in there, the lived experiences I drew from, and I hope they find comfort in them. also. I think I would cry if anyone ever made fanart for any of my wips.

no pressure tags for @faeriecinna, @albatris, @finickyfelix, and genuinely anyone who wants to do this! it was a lot of fun. blank under the cut.

1. What was the first part of your wip that you created?

2. If your story was a TV show, what would the theme song/intro be?

3. Who are your favourite characters you've made? Why?

4. What other pieces of media do you think would share a fan base for your story?

5. What has been your biggest struggle with your wip?

6. Are there any animals in your story? Talk about them!

7. How do your characters get around? (ex: trains, horses, cars, dragons, etc.)

8. What part of your wip are you working on rn?

9. What aspects (tropes, maybe?) of your wip do you think will draw people in?

10. What are your hopes for your wip?

#project: the rubicon #project: stewniverse #project: lilywood #tag game

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mianavs · 3 years

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Ameliorate

Your life was always a dark abyss until Matsukawa came in and made everything better

Matsukawa x f!reader

a/n: hands down the most difficult piece I’ve worked on but it’s finally done. not sure how i feel about it but i hope you all enjoy it anyway! kind of a slow burn fyi

tw: smut, oral (f!reader receiving), heavy angst, mentions of death/grieving

wc: 5.8k

It was a call you didn’t want to take. You were at work going over some accounts when the screen of your cell came to life and angrily vibrated on your desk. Sighing, you reached over to swipe on the red phone icon but the caller id caught your eye leaving you stunned.

[Mother]

You almost missed the call, lost in the negative emotions that the title unburied from the dark recesses of your mind. On impulse, you answered last minute and took a deep breath before you spoke to your mother for the first time since you left home four years ago. In the second it took for your mother to speak, you held out for an apology but instead received the news that your father had passed away the night before.

You exchanged few words with your mother, who was as frigid as ever, but nonetheless agreed to return home for the funeral. After informing your supervisor and taking off the rest of the week, you collected your things to leave only to be bombarded by your coworkers offering their condolences. You accepted their sincerity but felt nothing except for a queer emptiness.

Upon reaching the ground floor of the building, the elevator doors opened and a familiar voice caught your attention. You looked up to face your ex-fiancé speaking animatedly on the phone—until he saw you and his smile faltered.

It had been a mutual decision. After two years of dating, he’d wanted marriage and you—well, you weren’t sure what you wanted but marriage sure wasn’t it. The last you’d heard he had gotten married to some girl from HR and he looked happy. You plastered a smile on your face and greeted him with a nod before heading out.

At least one of you was happy.

On the train to Miyagi, memories of your parents occupied your thoughts. Your relationship them had always been strained. As the only child of a prestigious university professor and a retired news anchor turned housewife, they expected a lot from you academically and socially. Throughout your childhood, you struggled under the immense pressure they placed and you , more often than not, disappointed them.

It seemed that no matter how hard you tried to be their perfect daughter, you always fell short and got reproached accordingly. Your above average grades were never good enough. Your clumsiness and constant slouch made you unladylike, and your awkward mumbled speech was shameful. No matter what you did, the scrutiny never stopped and your imperfections only worsened over time. Your grades fell, you avoided going out with your parents to social events, and you spoke very little to your parents.

A quiet girl with no self-esteem, you started high school at Aoba Josai and everything changed when you met Matsukawa Issei. He approached you first during homeroom on your first day of school and never stopped talking to you from then on. He was patient and kind with you but also pushed you to get out of you shell. Before you knew it, he became your best friend and the two of you spent all of your free time together.

Issei’s friendship raised you up in many forms. Your grades increased after all those study sessions with him and Hanamaki. You stopped looking down at your shoes and found that the sky was much nicer to look at. You laughed, yelled, cried, and talked to Issei about anything and everything.

The change had been so sudden that even your parents noticed and treated you better. They stopped criticizing your every movement and that did wonders to your confidence. While the relationship between you and your parents slightly improved, your relationship with Issei bloomed like the cherry blossoms that fell on the day he confessed to you. For the first time in your life, you were truly happy until everything shattered when your parents found out about you and Issei.

You were reckless with the lies you told your parents to sneak out and see Issei. Your mind was clouded with thoughts of your boyfriend that you hadn’t noticed your parents had been awake when you snuck out at night. That night your parents caught you outside on a park bench with Issei’s head on your lap. As a result, you were confined to your room for a week with your mother becoming your personal jailer and after getting a taste of love and freedom—you refused to go back to being that insecure girl.

You rebelled against your parents. You got into screaming matches with your mother and argued with your father. The worst part of it all was the guilt that you felt after you’d yell at your mother or insulted your father. In that moment, you’d see the hurt in their eyes and the hesitation before they sent you to your room. You hated those looks because it proved that they too had feelings and you were capable of hurting them just like they’d hurt you.

Until you graduated, you lived like a ghost in your own home avoiding your parents as much as you could. You filled the emptiness you felt with Issei, who became your whole world. You went to all of his volleyball matches, he picked you up after work, and you spent most of your time at his house and with his family. The two of you planned a future together during your first year at college in Yokohama until the news of your mother falling ill sent you back home.

“Now arriving at Tokyo station”

The announcement interrupted your musings and you pulled out your phone to distract yourself from the bustle of people exiting the train. You scrolled through your social media page until a rare post from an old friend caught your attention. Oikawa had uploaded a photo of a historic site in Argentina and you found yourself searching for Issei’s name among the thousands of likes and comments. While Issei’s name hadn’t popped up, Hanamaki’s did and you clicked on his profile thoughtlessly. It didn’t take much digging on your behalf to find what you were looking for.

Only a couple of posts down was a photo of Hanamaki and Issei from a year ago at a restaurant you would recognize anywhere—after all, you’d worked there for two years. You couldn’t help but admire how good they looked. You memorized every detail of Issei’s face before a thought crossed your mind and your finger hovered over the screen.

A tap on the photo revealed Issei’s account and you hesitated to wonder if stalking your ex-boyfriend’s social media was the right move before you tapped on his username anyway and his profile opened up. It was on private to your dismay but his account picture showed you more than enough. It was one of Issei with one arm swung over a pretty woman’s shoulder. Shutting off your phone, you tried to convince yourself that you didn’t care but the tightness in your chest proved otherwise.

Gazing out the window at the rural towns the train passed reminded you of your father and his love for the countryside. You hated to admit it but, after living in the city for three years, you came to share the same sentiments as your father.

After returning home following the news of your mother’s illness, your father moved the family to rural Miyagi believing the fresh country air would do her good. Moving back with your parents wasn’t as difficult as you’d feared after leaving everything behind. Your mother still nagged you over everything but not as cruelly and would occasionally compliment your cooking when you fed her.

It was the relationship with your father, however, that changed the most which was why his deception hurt you the most. Your father was the one that helped you transfer to the university he taught at. The two of you always left for school together and conversations about school eventually filled the quiet void during those hour-long train rides to Sendai. Your conversations became personal at night over tea or sake and, in those moments, you felt as if you could forgive your parents and develop a relationship with them.

You should have been more suspicious about your mother’s condition. Whenever you asked your father about it, you’d attributed his wavering gaze to concern over your mother. The improved relationship between you and your parents distracted you from the unchanging condition of your mother despite constant medication and hospital visits. It never crossed your mind that the sickness had only been a ploy to guilt you into coming back to Miyagi so your parents could resume molding their matured daughter into what they wanted.

You found out by chance while listening in to a conversation amongst them but that was all it took to turn your newfound affection for your parents into resentment. For the entirety of the confrontation, you bit back tears when their reactions confirmed everything had been made up. After packing up your things and disowning your parents, you left home vowing never to come back.

“Now arriving at Sendai station”

The long drive to your childhood home did nothing to prepare you for the meeting with your mother. She looked tired and beat down; a sharp contrast to the strong woman she used to be.

“You look awful,” She chided, eyeing you with her sharp gaze. “You’re thin and sickly.”

“So are you.” Your retort was immediate and thoughtless but it shut your mother up. After a moment of deafening silence, she offered to help you with your bag but you declined.

“Come downstairs after you unpack. Dinner is almost ready.” With that, your mother left to the kitchen.

You were surprised to find your room in the same state it had been when you left for college. Palming through your old notebooks, opening your drawers to sift through old clothes, and collapsing on your bed to bury your nose in the sheets made you miss the simpler days of high school.

In the end, you were too distracted by your room to unpack but made sure to wash up before heading down to dinner—a habit your mother instilled in you and returned after only being in the house for twenty minutes. You also took your usual spot across your mother while the chair that your father had once sat in stood bare at the head of the table. The empty spot was disconcerting but your eyes remained fixed on the chair while your mind worked to restore the image of your father on it. Your trancelike state stopped when your mother cleared her throat.

“The wake will be tomorrow morning so ready by nine.”

“Do I need to do anything?”

“A small speech is expected of you.” She stated and left no room for argument. “There will also be familiar faces so behave accordingly.”

The meaning behind your mother’s warning dawned on you when the two of you entered the funeral home and were greeted by the one familiar face you didn’t expect to see—Issei.

If he was surprised to see you, he didn’t show it and was all business when he addressed your mother. Your shock only increased when your mother didn’t go off on Issei and instead treated him like an actual human.

When his sharp gaze shifted to your form, the air around you seemed to thicken and breathing became impossible. Standing in front of Issei took you back in time to those days when Issei would wait for you in the mornings to walk to school. You could have lost yourself in his eyes but the purpose of your return tore your eyes away and you bowed in greeting, not trusting your voice. He bowed as well and offered his condolences before turning to your mother and discussing the schedule and other details as they walked into the building with you in tow.

The discomfort you felt during the service increased tenfold with the arrival of the guests. Former colleagues of your father, friends of your mother, and neighbors crowded the small funeral home and they all had their eyes on you. The condolences, hugs, and pats left you suffocated and desensitized. Before long, their words fused together into a clangor that left you disoriented. You thought you were going to pass out until a former professor of yours asked a question that destroyed whatever remained of your composure.

“…so when did they find out the tumor was malignant?”

Tumor?

Malignant?

Your overwhelmed brain pieced together the information until you understood what had caused your father’s death—cancer. In that moment, everything ceased to exist and there was only you and your thoughts. Your blood ran cold and all of your limbs went numb. While your mouth hung open, not a syllable fell from your lips. As opposed to your frozen body, your mind raced and a whirlwind of emotions wreaked havoc on your being. When you came to terms with the fact that you hadn’t known your father’s cause of death, a strangled cry escaped your mouth and you darted out of the room.

The urge to leave and never return overcame all logic but, before you could make it out the door, a pair of large warm hands clasped your shoulders, gently stopping you dead in your tracks. The faint smell of cologne and musk hit you and you knew it was Issei before you looked up.

Warmth radiated from every part of his body and all you wanted was to bury yourself into him and hide from the world. His eyes widened slightly before he looked around and guided you away into a small room away from the guests. There was a sofa that he led you too and sat down next to you. Suddenly, Issei’s hands were on your cheeks wiping away tears you didn’t know where there.

“God…I’m a fucking mess.” You cursed and buried your face into your hands.

“Funerals are…difficult,” Issei offered. “Trust me, I work here.”

“I didn’t know,” you muttered raising your head. “I didn’t even know how my father died. I never asked my mother and she never told me. She just told me he died and I took a train here without thinking.”

“Everyone processes death differently, Y/N.”

“Fuck, Issei—I’m his only daughter for crying out loud!” Your voice broke as a fresh set of tears threatened to spill. “We’ve never had a stable relationship…but still, what kind of a daughter doesn’t know the cause of death of her own father? I just feel like I’m suffocating and I-I…”

Sobs tore out of your chest inhibiting you from speaking and Issei didn’t hesitate to envelop you in his strong arms that rocked you while he whispered calming reassurances in your ear.

“Shhh…it’s okay.”

“Everything will be fine.”

“This will pass.”

Your cries eventually ceased but neither of you let go. It felt easy to cling onto Issei while he held you just as tightly. The return of your wits, however, brought you back to reality and you let him go knowing it wasn’t right to cling onto anyone’s boyfriend—even if he’d been your friend before he’d been your boyfriend.

“Thank you, Issei. I should really head back now.”

Issei’s grip loosened slowly until he faced you with his thick brows knitted with concern. You smiled hoping it was convincing enough to reassure him before the two of you stood up and left the room. Near the entrance of the hall stood your mother angrily pacing back and forth until she saw you and Issei and opened her mouth to speak but stopped. You decided to speak first before she misunderstood the situation.

“I needed some space to calm down and Issei helped me find a place.”

Her piercing eyes took you in and lingered on your eyes; they were no doubt red and puffy from crying. The anger seemed to dissipate and her shoulder’s relaxed before she finally addressed you.

“It’s time for your speech. Are you ready?”

Coming from the woman that never asked you anything, her question caught you off guard but stirred something in you. You answered by nodding and followed your mother into the packed hall and up to the front where your father lied in his coffin. You stood to the side while your mother addressed the guests and you looked at your father for the first time in years.

The sight should have made you feel anything but the relief that washed over you. He looked at peace and it reminded you of the rare glimpses you’d caught of him talking with his students, fishing in the small pond of your country home, or drinking sake at night. It was with those memories that you replaced your mother and spoke to the guests.

You were composed for the entire speech despite your distraught state only minutes prior. It felt like a blanket of serenity had wrapped itself over your shoulders and shielded you from any remaining guilt. In the end, you wished your father well not because you forgave him but because you wanted to close that chapter in your book.

The rest of the ceremony was easier to stomach without the turmoil in your head. After the last guest left, you and your mother spoke to Issei and his boss about last minute details for the funeral the next day. Your mother offered a brisk thanks before heading out first and Issei’s boss followed, leaving you and your ex alone. The desire to ask him for his contact info was immense, but your better judgement won and you offered him a quick thanks before following your mother.

Very little words were exchanged with your mother that night and you headed up to bed completely drained from the day’s events. You’d just finished hanging up your mourning clothes when your mother knocked on the door and waited until you let her in—something she never did.

Still in her mourning gown, she held out a letter addressed to you from your father and seeing her up close, you noticed the wet cheeks and puffy red skin around her eyes. In all the years you lived with your mother, you had never seen her cry. Crying out hysterically? Yes. Witnessing actual tears or the evidence of tears on her face, however, not even once. Which was why you stood stunned as your mother placed the letter in your hand before leaving you to your privacy.

You tore open the sealed envelope and opened the letter to see that it was dated one year ago.

{Daughter,

If you are reading this, it is because I am no longer on this earth. As the disease weakens my body, I know that I will never see you again and write this to convey everything that I could not in life. I am well-aware that I lost the right to your forgiveness and I do not wish to receive it. Nothing will ever justify my actions towards you. I failed you as a father and caused you to grow up in a miserable home. I held you to expectations that not even I could achieve and I will regret the pain and suffering I caused you until my last breath.

I remember the day your mother brought you into this world. When I saw your frail little body and held you in my arms for the first time, I was struck with an immeasurable amount of fear. I was terrified of being a father and didn’t want you to suffer the way I did. I wanted to prepare you for the world in the way my parents never did for me. However, in the end, my own selfish desires to re-live my life through you tainted whatever intentions I’d had. I will never forgive myself for the irreparable damage I caused you therefore I ask that you do the same.

I wish to end this message by expressing how proud I am of the strong woman you’ve become. Everything you’ve accomplished is derived of your own merits and in spite of the suffering I caused you. Your mother and I are happy to hear of your successes and wish you happiness in your married life. I know you will live a long and happy life because you are not like me. You’re a fighter. You know what you want and take it without regrets.

With this, I hope that you will continue to grow and forget me as I am undeserving of living in your thoughts.}

What began as tears trailing down your cheeks, ended up as wails mourning your father. The proud man that you knew him to be in life came undone in that short letter and every word pierced your heart. In a manner reminiscent of the past, you disobeyed his requests and genuinely forgave your father while engraving each of his words into your heart.

The urge to see your mother led you to tuck away the letter and open the door only to find her already there. Muffling her sobs with her hands, her whole body shook as she gazed up at you. The fragility of her state stirred your compassion and your arms wrapped around her. Collapsing onto the ground, the two of you clung to each other and truly mourned the death of your father.

You woke up enveloped in motherly warmth like you were an infant again. Her eyes that once scrutinized your every move, were softer now as she talked about your father’s last days over breakfast. The hand that had disciplined you in the past now held yours during the Buddhist priest’s chant at the funeral. The circumstances were wretched but you finally felt at peace with your parents.

The funeral and cremation passed with you and your mother holding each other up. As the two of you jointly picked up the bone fragments with chopsticks and placed them in the urn, you came to terms with the fact that the relationship with your mother would never go back to what it was. A sense of filial duty stirred within you for the first time in a while only it wasn’t out of guilt—this time, you genuinely wanted to take care of your mother.

You found yourself outside of the crematorium waiting for your mother to settle things when Issei walked up to you. He’d been at the funeral ceremony, of course, but the crematorium wasn’t a part of his duties so you were surprised to see him. He still wore his black slacks and matching button down but his tie was nowhere to be seen and he’d undone the top two buttons of his shirt.

He began by inquiring about the cremation to make sure everything had gone well. You assured him everything went well before an awkward silence pervaded the space between. Desperate to fill the void with anything, you asked Issei a question only to find him simultaneously asking you one.

“Talked to Hana—”

“How long are yo—”

Your face flushed and Issei rubbed the back of his head as the two of you apologized for interrupting each other.

“You go first,” Issei gently insisted.

“I was going to ask if you’d talked to Hanamaki lately. I saw that you two went out…” The implication of your words caused you to clamp your mouth shut while your face burned even more.

“You saw…us?” Issei sounded amused and you looked up to find that same smirk from six years ago that produced butterflies in your stomach.

“Er…yeah,” you admitted. “I kinda found Hanamaki’s social media and happened a picture of you two.”

“Oh, that picture. That was the last time I saw him since he lives in Tokyo now. We still text though.”

“So Tokyo, huh? Good for Hanamaki.”

“What about you?” Issei asked, his eyes more intense than before. “Your mother mentioned you live in the city.”

“Uh yeah,” You said fidgeting with the material of your kimono. “I live in Yokohama. Got a job offer after graduation and I’ve been there ever since.”

“…Are you going back now?”

Issei avoided your eyes by looking away—an old habit you instantly recognized. Like the old days, you moved in the direction of his face and stood on your tippy toes with a cheeky grin on your face. Surprise flashed on his eyes before his mouth broke into a fond smile.

“I’m staying for a couple more days.” You replied and the next word flowed out naturally like water in a stream. “Why?”

“I wanted to catch up with you.” He admitted before his expression sobered. “Only if you’re up for it though. I don’t want you to feel like—”

“I’d love to catch up!”

And with that, the two of you exchanged contact information before your mother approached you. As you watched Issei walk away, you mother piped up next to you.

“He’s a good man. I regret not seeing it before.” It wasn’t exactly an apology but the effect was the same to you.

“And I regret letting him go,” you lamented.

“You still have a chance.” She replied and you met her gaze.

“I don’t. He has a girlfriend.”

“Then why did I overhear his boss trying to set him up on a date with his niece?” Your mother countered and then started to walk towards the newly arrived taxi.

“Wait, what?!”

Heeding your mother’s advice, you dressed up for your meeting with Issei. He picked you up and the first thing you noticed was the similar colored clothing the two of you wore. Laughing it off, you got into his car and made small talk about the changes in town while on route to the restaurant.

The conversation gave you the perfect excuse to admire him at ease. Issei had always been handsome but you had to admit that he’d really grown into his looks. Any lingering teenage awkwardness was gone and replaced by an air of confidence that he exuded in his speech, mannerisms, and voice. From his defined jaw to the protruding veins on his exposed forearm, you memorized each detail and replaced the memory you had of college freshman Issei with it.

Issei took you to the same restaurant you spent most of your evenings in during high school waiting tables and chatting with the volleyball team after closing time. Unlike the rest of the town, the tables, chairs, and décor remained the same and you were overcome with emotion the moment you walked in. After chatting with the owner for a bit, Issei led you to the table the boys would always take after practice to wait until you got off work.

“I can’t believe this place remained the same after all these years.” You commented after placing your orders.

“I know,” Issei replied grinning. “I can’t imagine this town without it.”

“Just sitting here brings back so many memories of us…” you trailed off when you noticed Issei’s unwavering gaze on you.

“Ah! And the boys too!” You added letting out a nervous giggle before taking a sip of your beer to cool your heated head. “How are they, by the way? I’ve seen Oikawa’s posts of Argentina but what about Iwaizumi?”

The conversation about the whereabouts of the volleyball team lasted until the food arrived. You asked about his family in between bites and Issei answered each of your questions about his siblings and parents.

After finishing your meal and ordering a second round of drinks the conversation switched over to work with Issei eager to find out what you did.

“Financing! Can you believe it?” You laughed. “Specifically, in the mortgage department.”

“Seriously?” Issei chuckled. “Whatever happened to being a novelist?”

“Life happened.” You answered and raised your glass in a mock toast.

“Ah, trust me. I completely understand.” He clinked his glass against yours and the two of you laughed before taking a sip.

After finishing your second beer, the warmth in your cheeks and your animated speech were all clear signs you were buzzed. It wasn’t until you asked the question on your mind since you’d seen that picture that you realized just how buzzed you actually were.

“So…are you seeing anyone?” Your eyes were lowered, but when Issei didn’t respond you looked up.

Issei’s eyes were darker than they’d been. The intensity of his gaze locked your eyes on his leaving you vulnerable. You were suddenly keenly aware how intensely your heart was beating and wondered if Issei could hear it.

“Why do you ask?”

His strained voice sent chills down your spine making you painfully aware of the building tension in your core. You knew what you wanted and you suspected he wanted the same thing but you needed to confirm your suspicions.

“I saw your social media account and the picture you used. The one where you’re hugging a woman…smiling…”

The more words that spilled out, the more pathetic you sounded and you eventually trailed off while averting your eyes.

“We broke up about a year ago.”

“What?!” The word slipped through your lips when your eyes snapped back to see him sheepishly running a hand through his wavy black locks.

“We wanted different things. I felt like I was holding her back so I let her go.”

“I completely understand,” echoing his words, your hand reached across the table to his. “My engagement got cancelled for similar reasons. He wanted marriage sooner than later and I wasn’t ready.”

The two of you shared a moment when, out of the blue, Issei took ahold of your hand and used his thumb to run slow circles on your palm; a gesture he’d always used to signal he wanted to be alone with you. Your breath hitched and a lazy smirk graced his face as he lifted your wrist and pressed a kiss on your pulse point.

“I-Issei,” you gasped and darted your eyes around the room to ensure no one had seen.

“Let’s get out of here. Come to my place.”

His voice was like honey to your ears and you nodded as the tension that’d been building spread to other parts of your body. With that the bill was settled and Issei drove you to his place while keeping a hand on your inner thigh that would occasionally drift and tease your clit.

By the time the two of you made it inside his home, Issei’s tongue had tasted every part of your mouth while his lips left yours swollen. Flushed and whimpering, Issei planted wet butterfly kisses down your jaw until he reached that spot on your neck that elicited a moan from your parted lips.

Issei groaned before sucking on that spot and you to pulled him closer by tugging on his hair—a move you knew drove him crazy.

“Fuck,” his warm breath fanned on your neck. “Fuck—not here.”

He picked you up and you wrapped your legs around his waist. You pulled his lips into another wet kiss that had him groaning into your mouth as his erection pressed against your soaked panties. He set you down on his bed and broke the kiss that left the two of you panting.

His hungry gaze traveled all over your body. Your dress was hiked up and he could make out the darkened material of your panties—the proof of your arousal. With a groan his stripped out of his shirt letting you take in his broad chest that you ached to touch. Grinning from your cute reaction he pressed a kiss to your forehead before snaking his arm behind your waist and laying you down on this middle of his bed. You reached for his clothed erection but Issei gripped your hand and placed it over your head.

“Not yet, pretty girl. Let me spoil you today.”

Issei’s skilled hands worked on your dress and slipped it off you followed by your bra and panties. His eyes raked over your body taking in the flushed skin, erect nipples, and trembling legs.

“Beautiful,” he murmured and leaned over to lick and suck on your sensitive peaks. Each flick against a nipple had you gasping. Each bite had you arching your back. The longer he teased, the more desperate your need to be touched and filled became until you took his hand and placed it between your legs.

“T-touch, me Issei, p-please...”

“That’s my needy girl,” he cooed and pressed one last kiss to your chest before settling between your legs and admiring the way your dribbling cunt clenched around nothing. “Such a pretty cunt.”

He flattened his tongue on your throbbing clit sending shocks of pleasure up your body. Issei’s mouth that alternated between sucking and biting down on your clit had you in tears from the immense pleasure and you lost count of how many times you came on his face. When his tongue delved into your aching cunt, you rutted against his face to push his tongue in deeper.

“Nghhh—Isseiiiii! Need y’now, please!”

Issei’s head rose from between you legs and just sight of his face covered in your arousal had your cunt pulsing again.

“What was that baby?” He teased and licked the translucent substance off his lips. His hands began to work on his pants and your eyes greedily took in his tented underwear. “Is this what you want, pretty girl?”

“Y-yes! Need it!”

It’d been so long since you’d been with a guy let alone one of Issei’s size. In fact, you were certain Issei was the biggest you’d ever had. That being said, the sight of his erect cock had you whimpering from both apprehension and desire.

Issei, always so attentive, noticed your reaction and settled himself on top before pressing a sweet kiss on your lips and assuring you he’d be gentle. You nodded before wrapping your arms around his neck while he rubbed his cock between your folds and against your clit in the way he’d always done before filling you.

Once your slick coated his cock, he lined himself at your entrance and slowly sheathed himself into you. The stretch was still painful even with the prep but as soon as he was halfway in, your walls relaxed and pain turned into pleasure. After bottoming out, Issei waited for your cunt to relax around him before he started moving.

With each thrust, Issei hit that spot near your cervix that built up your release time and time again. Every time your walls fluttered and your cum coated his cock, your nails raked over his back and Issei’s groans filled your ears until he too found his release. The two of you were insatiable and continued your lovemaking until the early hours of the morning.

In the end, you stayed the night and woke up mid-day with your head against Issei’s chest and his arms wrapped around you. Listening to his steady heartbeat and feeling the rise and fall of his chest convinced you of the thought you’d mulled over since your father’s funeral.

You wouldn’t return to Yokohama.

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elnotwoods · 2 years

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Top 5 pieces of media you try to get all of your friends to read, watch, or listen to?

Oh Ben, not you coming in with such a good one!

Hmmm… it totally depends on the friend cause I would not rec something I know they wouldn’t be comfortable with…

Books? Let’s see, I think I have talked about the Millennium trilogy by Stieg Larsson with most of my irl and online friends when I first read those books. It is not for everyone maybe but the themes of violence against women, paired with a badass female character? I still go back and re-read them once in a while! Oh, also something from Haruki Murakami, even tho he can be hard to get into but some of his books are really amazing! Also the Alchemyst, because it was a great book (I am a firm believer that the books you need to read will find you at the right time though). Nothing else comes to me rn. (My brain straight up can’t remember other books, it’s been a while since I read actual published books cause I tend to gravitate towards fics nowadays…)

Series/Movies? Hmm… I would tell everyone to watch Bad Buddy just to see how queer relationships can and do work! I also love recommending stuff that made a certain impact in the industry in the context of the time it was released! Like Star Trek TOS! Can’t go wrong there in my opinion… oooh, also Philadelphia! Granted, nowadays we wouldn’t cast a straight man in the role of a gay man of such importance, but at the time it certainly opened the doors and started discussions and the movie itself was so important. To Wong Foo is also a great movie in my opinion and more people should watch it. I also loved just recommending movies I’ve seen 100s of times like Ghost, Dirty Dancing, Moonlight, Snowpiercer or Parasite and some good 90s romcoms for a good movie night. Damn I don’t even know now, there’s so many…

Music? Okay, I am a firm believer that one should always explore and discover new things… and I certainly made a lot of my friends listen to opera because opera is something I came to absolutely love and adore… Madame Butterfly by Puccini? Goosebumps, especially with Maria Callas in the main role. L’elisir d’amore, Magic flute (Diana Damrau as the Queen of the Night? Hello?!) ooff there are so many I made my friends listen to, even took them to the opera with me. My admiration for this art form knows no bounds, I swear. I, of course, recommend a lot of Korean music to my friends. Eaeon is amazing, so are BTS of course. Their Korean discography is a gift that keeps on giving.

Ask me my top 5 anything!

#bengiyo #top 5 ask game #el’s got mail

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thedowncorner · 3 years

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This is the blog where I complain about capitalism and reblog queer stuff until I get depressed and overwhelmed by how many people desperately need financial assistance, and then realize how much I need financial assistance, and then realize next that thinking like that is probably/definitely hurting my fledgeling attempts at manifesting (I've managed one travel steamer for clothing so far. I think that counts though. I did already own it, true, but I couldn't find it and then it was just out on top of my counter. So it's manifestation or friendly ghosts, I guess) and log off for a while to recollect myself and get less angry and helpless-feeling.

This is not the blog where I limit myself to only BTS content because it brings me nothing but happiness, inspiration, laughter and motivation. But just for today, here, I want to say:

I learned from men younger but infinitely more talented and courageous than myself the following things:

1. It is good, right, and even of great impact on the world to pursue happiness for yourself as a priority (Jin). You can only help others by that pursuit.

2. Face yourself, accept your mistakes and those to come, love yourself for your present reality flaws and all, and love also who you hope to become (Kim Namjoon--RM--addressing the UN at an ungodly young age for that amount of power, charisma, and wisdom). This requires a courage that is phenomenal but still built one metaphysical/phorical vertebrae at a time. ("Of course I'm not unafraid. Of course it's not all okay. ... Bring the pain." --On, BTS)

3. Tell yourself in the mirror that you are wonderful once a day (Jin again). For anyone--like me--who can't at first connect with affirmations like 'I am worthy', and can't make it through 'I love myself' without dizziness, vomiting, headache, etc. at first, 'I am wonderful' might be the side entrance you need. It was for me. Apparently the mass of pain and self-loathing I carried around faithfully and that carefully defended itself against all attempts at dismantling it had failed to expect an attack from that direction, and 'wonderful' slipped in. ['Wonderful' was the word used in the eng subtitles of the video of the interview I saw. Whether it was a perfect translation or not I don't know, but one month of that changed my life.]

4. You are the one you have to love in this world. (Jin, from his song Epiphany). If you haven't, listen to Epiphany. And then take it to heart. Everything is possible once you love yourself truly, I really believe that. That it takes work to get there is undeniable, but it's worth it. Even just starting on a committed journey to true love for yourself opens up life in a thrilling way. And almost nothing you truly want is possible when you don't love yourself. I can vouch for this. Also, we're better people in the world and to each other when we commit to loving ourselves. It will only bring good.

Face yourself, Speak yourself, Love yourself.

BTS made history again two days ago and the world an even better place!!!

Thank you, BTS, for being one of the biggest inspirations in our world today, for putting so much positivity into the world and changing it forever for the better. All the hard hard work; the commitment both to professional excellence and personal evolution; the suffering, pain, dismissal, racism, xenophobia, mockery, media targeting, exhaustion and despair faced and overcome: you have moved the needle of human consciousness and experience so far to the positive it will never go back to where it was before you. You inspire me to face my own despair and fears and accept and overcome them, to create good, to spread joy and passion, to live with enthusiasm, and must importantly, to commit to every day, loving myself more. I am forever grateful to you.

To anyone reading all of this: today, try to love yourself, even just a little more than you did yesterday. Try a new word in the mirror, try happiness even if it's just for a few minutes. Take a break from the things that upset you and engage only with what excites, moves, and inspires you. Today, let yourself try only happiness. You might not move the world like BTS just yet, but you might discover a helpful ghost lives in your house and cares that you have wrinkle-free linen.

In the words of the man I most wish runs for presidency one day (preferably of the world), RM: "Use me. Use me, use BTS to love yourself."

#BTS #only bts content for today #on this momentous occasion #bts triple winners amas 2021 #bts history makers #bts amas #bts artist of the year #get inspired

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aion-rsa · 3 years

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He’s All That: Influencer Addison Rae Helms a Cast of Familiar Faces

https://ift.tt/eA8V8J

For Gen-X viewers, He’s All That is a story we’ve seen before: Pygmalion or My Fair Lady, but updated with cultural references, settings, and technology that make the story of the lesson behind the plot—that the person you are is more important than the image you put forth—more connected to a modern audience. But digital natives who have grown up with as much with TikTok as with teen movie tropes will have a far richer experience, recognizing the cast not only as actors, but as the same influencers they’re playing.

From director Mark Waters, this update, a gender-bent response to 1999’s iconic She’s All That, features a young influencer who, due to the live broadcast of a messy breakup with her budding rock-star boyfriend, loses her sponsorship (and is outed as the poor girl she truly is). The only way to get her sponsor back and save face is to prove she’s the makeover queen, able to make over any boy at their school the way she sculpted her ex’s image.

While the cast features a number of familiar faces and voices, this is not only Addison Rae’s film, it’s her first film. As her character Padgett Sawyer, the real-world TikTok celeb leads the familiar story through all the right beats, accompanied by pop-up chat windows and emojis that represent the presence of social media in the lives of all but Cameron Kweller (played by Tanner Buchanan), the object of Padgett’s make-over efforts.

Here’s a look at the cast, including some blink-or-you’ll-miss-it cameos of other influencers among the cast members…

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A post shared by Addison Rae (@addisonraee)

Addison Rae as Padgett Sawyer

Although this is Rae’s first full-length feature, she is no stranger to the camera. She began her career as a dancer, who in 2019 launched a TikTok channel featuring her dance takes on popular songs. At only 20, the Louisiana celeb is worth over $5 million and has more than 83.4 million followers on TikTok (far more than her character in the film). Rae has her own merchandise line, but has also endorsed brands including Chantilly Boutique, Cheapskate, FashionNova, McCrary Jewelers, and Uptown. (It seems doubtful that she relies on any of them for corporate sponsorship, the way Padgett relies on sponsor Bunny Venom, given her per-video payout rate on TikTok and the reports of what she brings in monthly on YouTube.)

Character Padgett is known for her makeover how-tos (some of which give bad advice, such as using toothpaste to reduce pimples), and in fact Rae’s very first YouTube video was showing how to do hair and makeup. Another is a Q&A with her 2020 flame, Bryce Hall. But more of her videos on both YouTube and TikTok feature music, and in addition to the requisite teen movie dance numbers featured in He’s All That, Rae does an excellent karaoke in the film with co-star Buchanan.

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A post shared by Bryce Hall (@brycehall)

Bryce Hall‘s Cameo

Speaking of Bryce Hall, Rae’s fellow TikTok star (21 million followers) makes a cameo in the film. Hall’s career as an influencer began when he livestreaming on YouTube at age 15 in an effort to make friends after being bullied. The social media influencer moved from Maryland to Los Angeles and joined TalentX Entertainment’s Sway House to create content for multiple platforms.

In the film, Hall has no lines, but commiserates with Padgett’s ex, Jordan Van Draanen (Peyton Meyer) about girls. In the scene, Van Draanen soulfully mourns that the girl he dumped Padgett for has ghosted him, then asks his friends (including Hall) if they caught all that on camera. (By the time of the film release, Hall and Rae were no longer together, which may make viewers curious how Hall now feels about that scene…)

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A post shared by Spencer X (@iamspencerx)

Spencer X as the DJ

TikTok viewers may also catch the cameo of Beatboxer Spencer X as the DJ behind the karaoke competition. With over 54 million followers, the sound effects champ (who includes the label Mouth Music Man on his site) also has two singles of beatboxing and remixed vocals available on Spotify.

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A post shared by Kourtney Kardashian (@kourtneykardash)

Kourtney Kardashian as Jessica Miles Torres

While Kardashian needs no introduction, this real-life friend of Rae’s takes on the role of Padgett’s sponsor, an exec at Bunny Venom, who fires Padgett when her image goes wrong. Kardashian became a reality star in 2007’s Keeping up with the Kardashians and is involved in fashion along with her sisters. Due to her popular presence on social media, Kardashian is regularly compensated by brands for featuring their products in her posts. She has also helmed the lifestyle website, Poosh.

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A post shared by Tanner Buchanan Official (@tannerbuchananofficial)

Tanner Buchanan as Cameron Kweller

Coming from a more traditional acting background, Buchanan plays an artist who has no interest in the falseness of the high school world (and gives out sage words of wisdom)–though deep inside, he’s still mourning the loss of his mother and feel disconnected from his family and friends until Padgett breaks through his armor. Viewers might recognize him from TV series like Game Shakers or Designated Survivor, but the martial arts skills he shows off in He’s All That might be better attributed to the set of Cobra Kai, another Netflix production (after its first two seasons on YouTube Red) in which he plays Robby Keene.

Peyton Meyer and Madison Pettis

Padgett has two antagonists in the film: ex Jordan Van Draanen (Meyer) and rich girl frenemy Alden (Madison Pettis). Meyer is known for Girl Meets World and American Housewife, while Pettis made her name as Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson’s daughter in The Game Plan on the Disney Channel. If her voice is familiar, it may be because the He’s All That mean girl also played animated characters including Izzy in Jake and the Neverland Pirates and Zuri in The Lion Guard.

Myra Molloy and Annie Jacob

This 2021 update to the classic teen movie features a secondary romance between two queer girls of color—Padgett and Cameron’s besties who hit it off, despite their social strata differences. LEGO fan Nisha is played by Annie Jacob, known for her role as Glory Moffett on Motherland: Fort Salem. Sweetheart rich girl Quinn is played by relative newcomer Myra Molloy.

Matthew Lillard as Principal Bosch

In the 1999 film She’s All That, Lillard played an obnoxious reality star who steals the girlfriend of the main character, played by Freddie Prinze Jr (also Lillard’s co-star in Scooby Doo). Lillard isn’t shown for most of He’s All That, as only his voice is featured for the majority of the movie, until the final scene, in which he’s revealed to be the principal of the high school.

Rachel Leigh Cook as Anna Sawyer

She’s All That lead star Cook comes back not as her original character, but as Padgett’s mom, who is a nurse working hard to keep them in the best school district. As the film comes to a close, a remix of the song “Kiss Me” plays at the school dance–a direct call back to the original film, which used that as the main theme. Cook’s recent Love, Guaranteed was another Netflix Original.

cnx.cmd.push(function() { cnx({ playerId: "106e33c0-3911-473c-b599-b1426db57530", }).render("0270c398a82f44f49c23c16122516796"); });

While He’s All That offers no surprises, the cameos and callbacks to the original film make this teen movie enjoyable as exactly what it is: a familiar tale with the usual happy ending, updated for a new audience.

The post He’s All That: Influencer Addison Rae Helms a Cast of Familiar Faces appeared first on Den of Geek.

from Den of Geek https://ift.tt/3h8F9cr

#aion-rsa #Den of Geek

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greylunar · 4 years

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Top 5 favorite books, pleass?

Oh jeez this is such a hard question! Hehehe okay after an inordinately long time thinking about it I have returned with my list! They’re in no particular order and of no like, specific quality or necessarily good to analyze or whatever, it’s just the five books I love the most!

-Inkheart by Cornelia Funke, a story about a young girl who gets wrapped up in intrigue concerning her father’s past and a certain mysterious book, great for people who love books and stories and the magic inherent in them.

-The Night Circus by Erin Morgenstern, in which two magicians of different backgrounds find their fates intertwined by powers outside of their control, amidst the backdrop of a dream-like circus. If you, like me, have always loved the idea of carnivals and circuses or, like me, have written several pieces on the inherent queer undertones of circus performance (this is technically a straight novel but if you’re interested in my three-page analysis of why it isn’t.... my partner and I were Celia and Marco for Halloween hit me up). I’m reading her other book Starless Sea right now and its incredible so far! She’s so good at creating an atmosphere of magic.

-Winter’s Tale by Mark Helprin takes place in a slightly alternate universe New York and follows thief Peter Lake near the turn of the 20th century, and that’s really all I’m going to say about it as its hard to describe. Mark Helprin is certainly not my favorite being in terms of political views but his writing style in both Winter’s Tale and his Swan Lake trilogy are probably the most influential on my style. If you dislike commas and run ons, this isn’t the one for you haha

-The Gift a collection of poems by Hafiz/Hafez, translated by Daniel Ladinsky. While I would love to hear if other folks have translations they prefer of his work, this is the one I’m most familiar with. Hafez writes about faith, love, and life in a way that really speak to me and make me feel more comfortable with being a person. Its a special kind of writing that can reach forward in time from the 1300′s and feel like a friend. Discusses god heavily, with Hafez being a sufi poet, in case that isn’t your cup of tea.

-100 Nights of Hero by Isabel Greenberg is not just my favorite graphic novel of all time, its a contender for my favorite feat of storytelling in just like, all media. Explores universal fairytales and love and sisterhood and what it means to be a person, all in a way that feels new and exciting and nostalgic all at once. If you like the musical Ghost Quartet, read this, or vice versa.

I hope if you end up checking any of these out that you enjoy them! And I appreciate you asking hehe, it’s funny to see how I’ve grown since I last made a list like this a few years ago. The first time in my life Peter Pan hasn’t been on here! It makes me happy to see the way I’ve changed as I’ve grown older (even if, in lost boy fashion, I still haven’t quite grown up) c:

#long post #tal asks #taliesin personal #noahvincent33

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suspiriu-m · 4 years

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About Me

Hello! My name is Sal and welcome to my blog, Suspirium! Suspirium is a word that originates from one of my favorite movies, Luca Guadagnino’s 2019 remake of Dario Argento’s classic italian horror movie Suspiria. According to World of Dictionary, Suspirium is a Latin word meaning “Deep breath, sigh”. It’s also the title of one of my favorite songs from the soundtrack to the movie produced by Thom Yorke of Radiohead. I’m a huge horror movie buff so expect to see a lot of that sort of content on my blog if I can incorporate it into any of my work. I chose this as the title of my blog because of how well the word fits into the movie, and I just love the way it sounds. Anybody who’s watched the movie will understand, but I won’t go into detail as to not spoil it for anybody who hasn’t yet seen it.

Throughout my highschool years I technically went to two schools. My main and home school was Middletown High School, and my secondary school was Orange Ulster Boces in Florida New York. In high school I was always in media production and art classes. For example, photography, video editing, drawing & painting classes and my favorite was an Elements of Horror class I took my senior year. Horror being my favorite genre, I absolutely had to take a class that’s dove into the origins of classic horror novels, films and short stories. Leading to me finding my favorite classic horror story Dracula by Bram Stoker, and a multitude of stories by H.P. Lovecraft. Continuing on now to college i’m now majoring in Media Production while also still taking some classes in Marketing and Design! I really enjoy both a lot so it’s hard to kind of pick exactly which I want to do, but it’s nice knowing that no matter what path I finally choose I'll still have some experience in the other!

Aside from my education, I love to watch horror movies and read stories in my own free time. Movies in general are a huge hobby of mine and I watch at least 3-4 a week given I have the time. Some of my favaroties of all time concerning classics have got to be the Halloween series, The Evil Dead series and all four of the Scream movies. Other hobbies of mine that take up a huge part of my life and time are video games and music. I have a pretty big record collection that’s continuously growing with at least 80-90 albums and counting. I just recently purchased a few more to add being Sade’s Diamond Life, Whitney Houston’s Whitney and Whitney Houston albums, Lazaretto by Jack White, Texas Sun by Khruangbin & Leon Bridges and Petals for Armor by Hayley Williams. Hopefully my next additions will be What’s Your Pleasure? by Jessie Ware and The Baby by Samia. I’ve been collecting them for years, but especially now since even CD’s are starting to go out of style. I’m the kind of person who still likes to have physical copies of all my music and movies and games so having such big collection is super special to me.

In terms of video games, I try and play as wide of a variety that I can because I believe I can find something I like in any genre. Strategy, shooters, brawlers, online competitive games etc, but I think my favorite style of game is single-player, narrative driven experiences. Most recently I played The Last of Us Part II and was absolutely enthralled with it. I loved the first game so much so getting a sequel was something I was extremely grateful for. I don’t think video games get enough credit for what they do for storytelling. TLOU 1 and 2 are some of my favorite stories that I have experienced in any form of media. The heartbreak, pain, love, fear and excitement those games have succeeded in giving me while just sitting in front of my TV is something no other form of entertainment has brought me. Some of the most touching moments, but also the most excruciating. They also had a queer women front and center throughout the games which is something that isn’t very common in video games so seeing that was really nice to me. Other than The Last of Us, some other solid narrative driven games I’ve played are God of War, Uncharted 1-4, Marvel’s Spider-Man, The Tomb Raider Reboots, Ghost of Tsushima, the Batman Arkham series and Control.

Although story based games are my favorites that doesn’t mean I don’t have a place in my heart for some good old fashioned fun as well! I also really enjoy a lot of the Super Mario and Legend of Zelda games as well. My biggest pet peeve that I have with the gaming industry right now though is Fortnite. I think it’s literally the most annoying game ever created. People spend hundreds and thousands of dollars just to buy skins and weapon packs and I think it’s absolutely ridiculous. The fact that I work at a major video game retailer and constantly have kids running through my store screaming about the damn game at least once a day could also contribute to my hatred. Either way, I want no part and absolutely nothing to do with it.

Going back to queer representation though. I recently watched Pose over the summer. Not only was the show heavily based during the AIDS epidemic in New York City, almost the entirety of the main cast was comprised of Transgender Black women. On prime time television! This is the first show to ever achieve such a feat. Not only was the cast extremely talented, I thought the writing and production of the show as a whole was brilliant. It definitely has its flaws and I could point out a few of them, but I believe all of the good of the show far outweighs the bad. It’s not afraid to tackle extremely real and difficult subjects the Transgender and Black communities have faced in this country and all over the world. It’s so important to see content like this on television as well because EVERYBODY deserves representation. Not only was the cast Trans, but one of the lead writers of the series Janet Mock is also a Black Trans woman! Pose was filled with heartfelt moments that truly had me sobbing in my bed as I watched. I think I actually cried at pretty much every single episode for both seasons. The cast is brilliant, the realism and talent and star power they bring to the show is like nothing that I’ve ever seen before and I’m so glad to be able to see them up on my television. I so badly one day hope that I can be behind the scenes of producing a show of this caliber some day.

While I have yet to help in the production of a show like this, I have had my fair share of of making short films, music videos and even assisting on a friend of mine’s first full length movie that he submitted to festivals. Last year, I had the opportunity to shoot a short horror film with my classmates for our final project. The film was based around a young woman getting trapped at her school in the middle of a blizzard, and slowly beginning to realize that she may not be alone. In a fight for her life, she has to survive till morning while going up against a mysterious killer who lurks the halls of her small town college. Sadly, we didn’t have enough time to produce a full and finalized cut of the film but coming together and working with a few other classmates was still a really fun experience. Not only was I able to play the role of the killer, I aided in audio, music selection, location scouting, props department, shot planning and writing the movie and it was a great time. I also had the pleasure of helping out my friend Matt Vincini in shooting his short film The Cattle Farmer. A horror/thriller film about a boy who is adopted into a family, only to realize that his life might have been planned from the start. It featured a mysterious woodland family who may or may not have had cannibalistic tendencies that included their adopted children. It was a super cool experience to be on a set with a bunch of actors and seeing my friend in action in the role of director. Collaborating on projects like this with friends is always a fun time, even it does get stressful at some points. At one point in the film, one of the characters realizes that the dinner he is currently eating could quite possible be his last meal ever. Which kinda let me to thinking what my last meal would be. After some thinking, I think i’d definitely have to choose my families homemade pasta and meatballs. I know, pretty stereotypical for an Italian family but it’s just so good. We make our own sauce every september and it’s a huge family event. Everybody comes together and one of our houses and it’s literally a whole days worth of work. The best part? At the end of the night, we all have a huge feast and make pasta and meatballs with all of the sauce we just made. It’s one of my favorite things to do with my family and always one of my favorite meals. Not only is it delicious, but also sentimental.

This is all for now! Thanks for stopping by my blog and reading a little bit about me. I could probably keep rambling on for hours but I don’t think that’s the smartest idea. I can’t wait to fill this blog with more content this year and hope to hear from you guys as well! Until then, i’ll be watching more movies and DEFINITELY playing some more games. At this point i’ve been playing the new Marvel’s Avengers video game so, let me get back to kicking some AIM ass!

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sadbi-hours · 5 years

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So I guess 9x07 of ahs decided to come after my deeply angsty ass tonight...and my god, did it do it beauitfully!

Oh, god, this episode bruh...where do I begin?!

Well let's start with Benji! Just when I thought I couldn't connect or feel anything new for Benjamin after the 100th episode than I already processed, welp I ended up being 100% completely wrong...so freaking wrong! I felt it all for this man tonight...I felt everything I could possibly feel for him!

I felt that bittersweet happiness that he emoted after he said his final goodbye to his brother...and he did what he believed was the right thing (spoiler and tw ahead) for the first time in his life...by ending it forever!

That fucking logic hurt me deeply in my soul! I understood it on a gut level. It resonated with me...because for--I am going to get personal, but heck it was a very personal episode tonight--someone who's tried to end their life before, I can empathize with his logic of believing the people you love are better off without the burden of you!

He's thinking of what he believes is best for his son, protecting him the only way he had left and knew how to...he took it as a fool proof plan to defeat RR and end the horrors he started in 1940s by being forced to kill his own mother...who only ever wanted the same before grief and rage twisted her soul and intentions!

I mean that's some deep shit! And Miss Lily Rabe just decided to came for our souls tonight, huh?! Lol! Because how could I condemn her for what she's done! She lost her son in the worst way possible...let it fill her with rightful hate and rage and a call for justice and she unleashed her pent-up emotions in a horrifying way--i am seeing a recurring theme for the ladies of 1984!

And I kind of like how it tied into the blood curse of Camp Redwood! I've been wanting to know more about the camp's logic for keeping everybody who has died stuck there...and we got it and why it may not have been as intricate as some of Ryan's plot twists, I believe it worked beautifully! Sometimes simple is better...and The White Lady's hatred for the camp counselors of any kind is what has keep them there...not a moral thing per say was fucking brillent on his part! Plus Hello our little Friday the 13th easter egg so to speak lol!

And I will just say too that the writing was really on point this episode...for me at least! Ryan wasn't relying solely on soundtrack to get his point across on what we should be feeling...he let the shows composers and Lily and John's amazing acting do it for us and I think that was a wonderful decision!

And speaking of amazing acting, Lily and John both slayed it this episode...I mean their scenes together are what sold me on Ryan's twist! They broke my heart in two...I mean when Benji was giving his speak to the ghosts of Redwood even they were lowkey crying for him, except Montana...she didn't even bother to hide how deeply what he said touched her...and I think that she can relate to him deeply when it comes to losing a sibling that was in some ways your entire reason for existing!

And while we didn't get too much of Benji and Bobby's relationship...I feel like Bobby was probably Benji's only friend...someone despite his jealousy of, understood and listened to him! I see the recurring themes you are sending out there, Ryan Murphy...and tonight, just know that you have my full support of it haha!

(Warning for those who are anti Montana, dark xavier, or xantana...this is their little section but I won't be sticking on them much because there wasn't much of them tonight...which I actually liked but anyways...)

And I guess Montana just runs the ghosts of Camp Redwood now...I mean in her words: Choice! I believe that 100%...and I don't need to explain why lol...but I also like that while they are scared of her and they should be...they also subtly in some ways look to her for or to know how to express compassion! I mean, I love my girl but she is Montana (who hasn't shown much of it besides those two times with brooke in ep 2 and again with xavier in ep 5) and while I know that all of Camp Redwood was crying at Benji's speech, they all tried to hide how much it affected them...all except Montana! She so to speak openly weep for him...and showed him that she understood and felt for him by once again offering up one of her homeboys off as tribute to take him to his mother...

And tbh, I don't know how I feel about that...It could just be Montana always trying to adapt to what people need and crave from others as a way to get what she wants...or she does it because deep down that's who she is: always giving up who she truly is to be what people need her to be!

Richard wanted a ruthless sex kitten...she gave that to him, but that was to get him to do what she wanted...but it still in a way makes my point lol...anynhow, Chet seems to be seeking something of a sister/mother type figure and she's given that to him, by looking out for him and keeping him in check...Xavier wants to have control over his situation, she gave him that (tho my xantana loving ass still thinks there is more to it than that but that's for another day)... Ray wants someone to take his moral conflicts out on, well she lets him bitch her out as he cleans up her kills... and everyone in Redwood wants to leave, she hatches a whole ass plan to maybe help release them from it...and Trevor wants what could have been, so well you know...and I ain't mad because we all know Montana lives for variety and no matter how much she loves someone, she'll never be 100% faithful in a sexual manner, so who knew I'd come to a day i'd be cool with that, but she has never lied about that part of her...and in some ways, she remains me a lot of Brian Kinney from Queer as Folk, who was very similar in that belief...and I swear it's so nice to see a woman in media allowed to be that sexually open and not condemned for it by the people around her who matter...

But we will see, Xavier has been known to be a jealous boy when it comes to Trevor...so who knows how that will turn out?!

And look I know I may be reaching, but that's what I've come away with for her this ep. and I'm just airing it out there haha!

And that leads me to Brooke and her whole debacle this episode:

Not only do Donna and Brooke need a freaking hug after this episode, but I truly thought I couldn't love Brooke more after last ep...and I was pleasantly wrong on both beliefs lol!

I loved her struggle to trust Donna and her motives for helping her...all understandable! Donna and the entire lot of those she's blindly trusted have fucked her over, but I love that here her trust wasn't misplaced. Donna only ever wanted to fix what she's caused...and she never wanted anything else from her. She gave back to Brooke what Brooke gave to her: trust and understanding.

I mean she was so in sync with what Brooke was trying to do with rushing her with the truck...not for a moment did Donna believe she was trying to kill her and I adore it! I seriously thought for a moment that Brooke was going to let her trauma and need for revenge allow her to become Montana 2.0 but she didn't! Brooke has completely stuck to what she believes is right these last two episodes and I 100% love her for it.

And I also liked that entire roller rink scene...and it's underling purpose! Donna let her experience some of what she missed in 80s while in prison...and thank you Ryan Murphy for having one character in 1984 actually in a way healthily air their traumas in a safe place...with a trustworthy (ish) person...and in return get almost a heathy response on how to cope with it!

I forever will give you kudos for that, but I also understand this is ahs and this is also a homage to 80s slashers and the main final character always returns to their greatest horror...and for Brooke that's Margaret and Camp Redwood, but my girl Donna decided to fuck it all and be a ride or die bff for a bitch...and I stan it so hard!

I love how we are getting ahs' verison of a positive female relationship...i'd never thought I'd see the day haha! Ryan just giving everyone something this season!

And Dylan's character, Bruce (?) is it bad I want to see more of him, even tho he's clearly psychotic and probably be looking to end Brooke's life after what she did...which I cheered her on the whole way as she did it...but yeah, please give me more of Dylan's insane character! Please and thank you...as if we didn't have enough chaos going on with only two episodes left, I also want Dylan's brand to be added to the mix haha!

And to Margaret, I still only have one thing to say...

I mean Lavinia said (@scienceandmischief for pointing it out her name to me! Thanks so much ❤) that Margret was already unhinged...Lily's character just nudged her in the direction she wanted to go...she still needs to pay for what she's done and hopefully my wifey Brooke will be the one coming to collect...but I am fascinated by a few things. Has Margaret's fanatic religious talk...been her deep down way of trying to atone for what TWL awoken in her and the things she's done?! I mean I don't know if it really matters at this point with her...but it still makes my brain wheels churn.

#ahs 1984 #i really really dug this episode...it was really deep and in the right way that its fallen flat with in other eps #and i wasn't excepting it...so maybe i was blown away buz my exceptions were already so low #but who cares #i think this will end up being my fav episode this season with the 100th being my second #it just really surprised me in the best ways possible #but i undertand if thats just me #but i love it lol #and i love how brooke said bi rights this entire ep...you cant tell me that just men appoarched her fine behind in thay rollee rink #you just cant

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queer-starwars-bracket · 10 months

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Queer Star Wars Characters (Round 2): General Bracket Match 28

Sky Graf | Identity: non-binary | Media: The High Republic Quest for Planet X

Sky Graf was a young member of the wealthy Graf family. A year before the Night of Sorrow, their father went missing looking for Planet X. To prove themselves to their family and possibly find their father, they stole their older brother’s ship the Brightbird and deemed up with Dass Leffbruk (who had previously made it to Planet X) and the Jedi padawan Rooper Nitani to use a Force artifact to try to find Planet X during the great hyperspace race. The Force artifact brought them backwards through the planets Dass had recently visited, where they face challenges while also trying to outrun Sky’s brother. During their journey, they also had to take the Path of the Open Hand member Fel Ix as a hostage. Fel Ix began to break through his cult programming, and when the news of a possible battle between the Path and the Republic reached the crew of the Brightbird, he convinced Sky to give up the search for Planet X to travel to Dalna. Fel Ix succeeded by appealing to Sky’s connection with their father by pointing out how he was a father himself. Working with Fel Ix, Sky helped defeat the Graf code that was corrupting the communication buoys in the Dalna sector, preventing more violence during the Night of Sorrow. Their brother, Helis, eventually caught up with them. But the siblings were able to talk about their feelings and reconcile. The two of them would fly the Brightbird together and continue to prospect. But Sky would no longer chase their father’s ghost.

Sky’s lifestyle was a combination of the hard and technical life of a pilot and hyperspace prospector combined with the luxury of their family’s level of wealth. They are very intelligent when it comes to science. They are confident, with a prickly exterior. They didn’t connect with Fel Ix the way Dass or Rooper did until the end, not wanting to try to understand the perspective of someone who tried to kill them. When things got serious, they showed a surprising capacity of violence and a willingness to do anything to achieve their goals. They only felt like they had unconditional love from their father, his disappearance driving them even further in conflict with their family. At the end of the book, they are more at peace, but still eager to make their own name separate from the Graf dynasty. Unusually for transgender characters in Star Wars, there is explicit discussion in their internal monolog about how they felt gender dysphoria when they started to go through puberty and how their father got them a binder.

Amara Kel/Howlrunner | Identity: wlw couple | Media: “Amara Kel’s Rules for TIE Pilot Survival (Probably)”

Amara Kel is the narrator of the short story “Amara Kel’s Rules for TIE PIlot Survival (Probably)” which is her internal thoughts about how to survive as a line TIE Pilot. This military satire story also details her relationship with another pilot, nicknamed Howlrunner. Amara Kel is snarky and cynical, dissoluted with the Imperial Navy but without the kind of spark that would lead her to defecting. She is happy to stay in the background, staying alive without promotion and glory. However, Howl’s skilled flying inspires in her a sense of love and respect for the TIE fighter and the wire thin finesse in its flying.

Amara and Howl’s Theta Squadron was one of the squadrons dispatched to hunt the Millenium Falcon through the asteroid field around Hoth. In spite of rule number one “Don’t Get Attached”, Howl pulls off some crazy flying maneuvers and saves Amara from being eaten by the exogorth. Miraculously, they both survive that deployment.

#star wars #sw #facpov esb #sky graf #the high republic #sw thr #sw thr phase ii

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aroworlds · 6 years

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Aro-Spec Artist Profile: Sebastian

Our next aro-spec creator is Sebastian, better known on Tumblr as @gloriousmonsters and @mangledmouth!

Sebastian is a bisexual, autistic, aromantic trans man who is single-handedly covering many literary bases in producing original aro and queer short stories, novels and poetry. Aside from his Tumblr blogs, you can find and support more of his work at his Patreon. If you have a dollar or two you’re wanting to invest in worthy aro-spec talent on a less-regular basis, please take a look at Sebastian’s Ko-Fi!

With us Sebastian talks about identifying with the role of villainy in narrative as an aro creative, aromantic characters and grand emotional gesture, the divide between representation and self-expression, and some spectacular-sounding work-in-progress book titles! His investment in aromantic characters and characterisation shapes every word, so please let’s give him all our love, encouragement, gratitude, kudos and follows for taking the time to explore what it is to be aromantic and creative.

Can you share with us your story in being aro-spec?

It took me a while to realize I was aromantic, but it was one of the things that made me go ‘oh, that makes … a lot of sense’ when I looked back at my childhood. I was a weird, isolated kid, so I didn’t learn from bouncing off other children; I learned through stories.

One of my strongest early memories is of watching a poorly made Red Riding Hood film over and over again, belting out the lyrics to the (poorly written) villain’s song, called ‘Man Without A Heart’. Cut to a year or so later, watching the Rodgers and Hammerstein Cinderella (still the best Cinderella, IMO), I was utterly fascinated by the villainess singing: ‘Falling in love with love is falling for make-believe…’

I didn’t know, that early, that I didn’t feel romantic love. Not consciously. But there was something utterly, obsessively interesting about villains that sneered at love, who were called heartless, who challenged the narrative that there must always be a love story and it must come out right no matter what. I felt, on a deep level, that these people were like me somehow. The additional queercoding and common side-helping of mental illness helped - or didn’t help, depending on your perspective. I grew up knowing, deep down, what my part in life was: I was the villain.

When I hit my rebellious age, it first came out by my saying, ‘But being a villain doesn’t mean you have to be wrong or unhappy’. I began collecting villains like nobody’s business, and writing stories that more and more often centered people whose character types I’d only ever seen as villains. And from there we arrive at today!

Are there any particular ways your aro-spec experience is expressed in your art?

Recently, my brother (who is my sounding board for a lot of stories, as I am for him) looked at my books-to-write list and said, ‘Nearly every idea you have is a deconstructed romance or strong non-romantic relationship.’

I love strong relationships, so I originally thought I needed to write people as love interests to get that; these days I feel more free to focus on whatever the heck I want, and being aro shows in everything. My current WIP centers a poly relationship where two of the partners are aromantic. Two people (often, but not always, a man and a woman due to my frustration with the ‘men and women can’t be friends’ thing) who are the most important people in each others’ lives and are platonic, show up over and over again in my novel ideas; I start with relationships that look like romances and then pull them apart. Part of this, I think, is due to my autistic ‘let’s take this into component parts and see how it works’ tendencies; being autistic and being aro aren’t cause and effect, for me, but they play well together.

When I write poetry, some of it deals explicitly with being aromantic, but all of it is non-romantic. It makes me kind of anxious sometimes to think of people interpreting pieces as being romo because they’re about intense emotions; one of the biggest ways being aro is expressed in my writing is my constant attempts to show other feelings, connections and relationships than romance being worthy of big feelings and gestures. I’ll sometimes refer to myself as ‘aromantic but capital-R Romantic’ (i.e. extremely dramatic) because of that.

What challenges do you face as an aro-spec artist?

I’m sure I’ll run into more problems as I try to take my increasingly aro and queer and ND works to professional markets, but at the moment my biggest problem is self-censoring. I sit at an awkward junction of having multiple identities I want to include in my work, and being … well, someone who grew up obsessed with villains, who later on developed a decade’s interest in slasher horror, and who still tends to write people who are perceived as, or see themselves as, villains. Awkward because I always have that voice in my head (helped along by some of the stuff I see on social media) going ‘that’s not good rep! nobody will want to read this!’

But I know from experience that not writing from the heart (and look at that, I do have one after all!) doesn’t end well, so I’m working on getting good at writing my weird dark stuff and hoping I’ll find the audience for it. And I always leave a little bit of light in it, because I have another voice in my head, still saying, ‘just because you’re a villain doesn’t mean you can’t be happy’.

It’s a weird sort of positivity, but it works for me.

How do you connect to the aro-spec and a-spec communities as an aro-spec person?

Following and submitting to this blog is part of my first attempts to actually join the aro-spec community. I tend to move slowly and be very nervous of talking to new people, but I’ve been trying to be more affirming of my aromantic identity lately, and seeking out other aros is part of that. Hopefully I’ll settle in a little more as time passes.

How can the aro-spec community best help you as a creative?

At the moment, people following and reblogging from my poetry blog @mangledmouth would be much appreciated. It’s hard to get traction with poetry (especially if you don’t write romantic poetry) and I’d love more people to see my work. I’m proud of a lot of what I’ve done, so check it out! Be warned that my love for horror and oddness turns up there as well, but there’s nothing too graphic.

And Ko-Fi donations or small Patreon subscriptions are always appreciated.

Can you share with us something about your current project?

My current WIP (titled either The Night In Wanting or And One of Us Be Happy, depending on whether I go for the one that sounds better or the one that fits best thematically) is about a third done! Praise me, because I’m really bad at finishing things, but I’m still on track to wrap this up at the end of June. It’s about a Weird Small Town and Sarah, a girl with a reputation for breaking hearts, who decides to date one of her best friends and actually try to make it work. Her attempts at being normal quickly get derailed when their town’s general weirdness turns hostile - attacks by creatures from the woods, unsettling amounts of rain, pictures changing when you’re not looking at them and a really pushy forest spirit trying to bargain with people for a heart. Her attempts at normal are further derailed when she figures out that her new boyfriend is also in love with a mutual friend, and that she might not feel love at all.

I love these characters, guys. This story is finally coming together after years and the three main characters - Sarah, Mags and Fred - have always been at the heart of it, no matter what shape it took. (Mags used to be a ghost, and the story went through a phase of being a Band AU of itself. Fred kept getting possessed, and there’s a joke about that in the text now that nobody will get but me. And now you guys!) It’s terrifying to write a YA that’s not only poly, but focuses on an aromantic main character, but I’m determined to make it work.

(This is is one of the most sweet/normal things I’ve worked on, despite the healthy dose of horror. I’ve also been writing snippets of a pet project called How The Child-Eater Became King, to give you an idea of the other end of the spectrum.)

Have you any forthcoming works we should look forward to?

I haven’t got the release date for it yet (it’ll probably be a while yet) but I recently sold a short story, Sabuyashi Flies, to Glittership. The main character, Sabuyashi, was originally aroace but turned out to be a lesbian ace during writing. (Characters often decide to come out while I’m writing, which is always fun to handle. I mean that both sarcastically and genuinely.) I’m already working on and off on the sequel story where she meets her future best friend Nathaniel, who is aro. Working title is Nat Luckless and the Girl Made of Beetles. Look for news about Sabuyashi Flies soonish and Nat Luckless whenever my slow butt manages to finish and (fingers crossed) sell it!

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concerthopperblog · 4 years

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20 Standout Roots and Americana Albums of 2020: 20-11

It's tough to think of very much good about 2020, much less “best” or favorite”, unless you count it almost being over. But, while those of us who love live music (and you can guess, at a site called “Concert Hopper” that's all of us) have been suffering, one result of artists being off the road is that it's given them time to create some stellar albums. Even keeping to roots music, culling down my list of favorites to 20 was a chore, and I left some very worthy albums on the table. Note I said “favorite” there, not “best.” Plenty of sites will be giving you the “best” albums over the next few weeks. I'm not that vain. As Concert Hopper's resident roots music consumer, I'm one man with one set of ears. I can't possibly hear even 1/10th of all the albums released in a year, much less tell you what is the best. My hope is that, in the 20 albums contained in this and the forthcoming article, you will find something you haven't heard before, or something that you may have, but need to give another try.

A note on my methodology, just to curb the outrage. My list has always excluded live albums, re-records, cover albums, and compilations, just to keep the number manageable. So that's why you won't see Sturgill Simpson's excellent Cuttin' Grass or Margo Price's Perfectly Imperfect listed here. I broke that rule twice this year, but have endeavored to explain why in the individual comments.

But enough housekeeping! Let's get to the first half of what I consider the 20 standout roots and Americana albums of 2020. Where I reviewed the album, I have included a link to the full review. Where I haven't, I have included a Youtube link to one of the album's songs.

20. Antsy McClain- 15 Songs From Isolation For anyone who is a fan of Antsy McClain or his band The Trailer Park Troubadours, it was no surprise that he was one of the first to release a full album of songs written and recorded during the COVID-19 lockdowns. Always a DIY kind of artist, this setup really isn't all that different than many of his albums. The real sell for 15 Songs From Isolation is another of McClain's hallmarks; finding the humor and silver lining in even the darkest moments.

19. Chicago Farmer- Flyover Country “Flyover country” is a pejorative term, supposedly used to by coastal elites to describe the residents of the Midwest and the South, places they only “fly over.” Mostly it's a term used by conservative pundits to fire up those same heartland residents. But it's a perfect title for an album by Chicago Farmer. His songs weave relatable tales about the oddballs and misfits who provide color to any small town; the people who complain about “$13 Beers” at arena shows and spend their paychecks “All in One Place.”

18. Della Mae- Headlight When I first saw them as the opening at at Americanafest's smallest venue a few years back, I knew Della Mae was going to be something special. Since that time, the lineup has changed and the people wanting to see them wouldn't fit in The Station Inn. But the things I loved then, a firm grounding in roots traditions with a willingness to experiment with new sounds and inject a much needed dose of feminist fire into a bluegrass genre that has traditionally been fairly chauvinistic, is present in spades on Headlight, bolstered greatly by assistance from gospel vocalists The McCrary Sisters, who should be contractually obligated to appear on any album with a chorus.

17. KIT- EP When I put this list together, having Della Mae and KIT next to each other was an accident; but it ended up being a fun one. I discovered KIT aka Katie Wighton's band All Our Exes Live in Texas in the exact same circumstances as Della Mae. Following the Australian folksters on social media led me to Wighton's solo debut. For those looking for Exes type harmony, you're out of luck. Instead, KIT uses her freedom to explore power pop, punk, and country soul. At an economical 15 minute run time, KIT won't take you long to sample, and it's as good a quarter hour as you'll spend all year.

16. Secret Emchy Society- The Chaser While Queer Country has been around for decades, it's just now grown enough to start to get noticed, and many people misunderstand the label, thinking they're signing up for “message” songs about inclusion. While that exists if it's what you want, it's not what you'll find on The Chaser. Instead, Secret Emchy Society simply wants to be out (and if you think all that's over, go look up the furor around “Girl Crush” a few years back) while producing a slate of hard living, hard drinking, and hard fighting barroom country. Album standout “Whiskey Fightin’ Terri” sounds like Waylon Jennings' lyrics if interpreted by Robin Weigert's Calamity Jane from Deadwood.

15. Cinder Well- No Summer The most rewarding part of this job is finding bands you've never heard and likely never would have without a random press release. For me this year, that was Cinder Well. The “doom folk” group formed by Irish singer-songwriter Amelia Baker has one of the most original takes on roots music of 2020, and one that fits the year. Owing as much to the atmospheric dread of early Black Sabbath as to Appalachian and British folk, Baker has crafted the perfect album for the isolation and desperation felt by many during a year best forgotten. Cinder Well is a band I hope to keep with me long after this pandemic is over.

14. Whitney Rose- We Still Go to Rodeos Another Americanafest discovery for me, Canadian Whitney Rose came to prominence with a voice as sweet as Skeeter Davis and an attitude as big as Joan Jett. After recording two albums with her musical mentor Raul Malo from The Mavericks, We Still Go to Rodeos is Rose's declaration of independence, as well as her first full-length album to fully embrace the musical influences of her new home in Austin. Working with producer Paul Kolderie, known as much for working with rockers like Radiohead and Morphine as with roots artists, Rose pushes her own boundaries with the addition of rock guitars while retaining the unique style that gained her fans in the first place.

13. Sawyer Fredericks- Flowers For You Most fans who know Sawyer Fredericks know him from his winning turn on singing competition show The Voice in 2015. But to lump him in with the glut of “reality TV singers” would be a mistake. After walking away from the mainstream to record the excellent blues-folk Hide Your Ghost in 2018, the 21 year old singer evolves again, tapping into the chemistry of his road band to become not a solo artist, but more of an Americana Alice Cooper, a band that just happens to have the same name as its singer. Flowers For You also sees Fredericks evolving as a songwriter, especially on the socially charged (and instrumentally intense) album highlight “Call It Good”, decrying a culture where markets throw away perfectly good food while people starve.

12. X- Alphabetland “Wait,” some of you are saying right now, “X, like the LA punk pioneers? In a roots music list?” Yes, because X has always had a core of Carl Perkins' rockabilly sound that drove their punk fury. After a couple of decades of solo exploration in the country scene by band founders Exene Cervenka and John Doe, their first X album since 1993 ramps up the rockabilly influences even more. Reunion albums are a hit or miss prospect. X hit it out of the park. Even in their '60s, Doe and Cervenka can out-rock and out-snarl any given Warped Tour lineup combined.

11. Gillian Welch and David Rawlings- All the Good Times Are Past and Gone When I told you I was breaking my “no covers albums” rule this year, this is where I do it. I could try to make a good excuse for that, but the simple explanation is that Gillian Welch and David Rawlings are so consistently solid in anything they do, any release deserves a place on any year-end list. On All the Good Times Are Past and Gone, recorded acoustic and at home on reel to reel, Welch and Rawlings take on “traditionals” like the title track, as well a god-like songwriters Bob Dylan and John Prine, who give the album its two shining highlights in Prine's “Hello in There” and Dylan's “Abandoned Love.”

That's it for the first half of my favorite roots albums of 2020. Stay tuned soon for my Top 10, as well as other year wraps to come.

#2020 #album review #review #Concerthopper #Roots Music #americana music #americana #best of 2020 #music #Americana Music

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fandomsandfeminism · 7 years

Video

youtube

Your Lie in April uses visual metaphors and symbolic imagery to add layers of meaning and foreshadowing to the story. In fact, if you know what to look for, they foreshadow the ending in the very first minute of the show.

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Full Transcript below

Today I want to put on my English Major boots and talk about metaphors. Specifically, I want to talk about how visual metaphors, or symbolic imagery, can add meaning to a piece of visual media. We’re going to talk about the 2014 anime Your Lie in April and how its consistent use of visual metaphors establish mood, helps readers made connections between events and characters on a thematic level, and foreshadows the whole god damn ending right in the OP.

Before we get started though, we need to define what visual metaphors and symbolic imagery are. This gets a little technical. A visual metaphor is an object or image that represents something else. Symbolic imagery are images that are not descriptive in a literal sense, but are intended to express an abstract idea in concrete form. There are shades of difference between these terms, though they sound very similar. A girl giving the person she loves a locket turns that locket into visual metaphor for their love. If the person loses or breaks the locket, we, as readers, know that their relationship is in danger. Visual metaphors are generally diegetic objects, meaning real objects that exist in the story, that have a metaphorical importance in the narrative. A lightbulb appearing over a character’s head when they make a plan is symbolic imagery. It is an image that does not describe a literal object, but an idea. Symbolic imagery is typically non-diegetic, meaning they are not literal objects in the world of the story, and is used to convey abstract information. Your lie in April uses both of these techniques. -

If you have never seen Your Lie in April, be warned. There are a lot of spoilers in this video. Big, massive, end of series spoilers. Also….go watch Your Lie in April. It will break your heart beautifully.

Your Lie in April came out in 2014 from A1 pictures. It is 22 episodes long and can be found on both Crunchyroll and Netflix. And it is devastating. It follows the story of Kosei, a teenager who used to be a piano prodigy. After his abusive mother dies, he stops playing completely, unable to hear the music over his own panic attacks. Two years later, in the spring, under the cherry blossom trees in full bloom, Kosei meets Kaori. Kaori is blonde and beautiful and plays violin and has a crush on Kosei’s best friend, Watari. Kaori drags Kosei back into the world of music, and he quickly finds he loves her.

And SPOILERS for the end: Kaori dies. Its horrible and tragic and she dies. And we find out that she had been sick all along, and that her liking Watari was a lie so that she could meet and befriend Kosei.Because she loved him. That’s the lie in april.

And then you just cry forever.

Your Lie in April has a pretty straight forward plot. The only real “twist” happens right at the end and, as we will discuss, is pretty heavily foreshadowed. The show takes on a great deal of depth with the use of its visual metaphors though. Today we’re going to talk about 3 of them. The deep ocean/shallow sea, the black cats, and the cherry blossom tree. -

Let’s start with the deep ocean/shallow sea. This is a pair of symbolic imagery. The deep ocean appears when Kosei is unable to hear himself play the piano. It symbolizes the crushing anxiety and fear and pressure he feels that leaves him unable to play. This image is, of course, non-diegetic, and the same basic information could be conveyed without the image. You could imagine the scene of just Kosei sitting at the piano, shaking, unable to play without losing any of the plot. But this image of the deep ocean allows the viewer to more fully understand what this emotion would feel like. It is crushing.

It also draws a direct connection and contrast to the shallow sea image. Kosei is in the shallow sea, surrounded by the sky, when he is playing with Kaori. By having this be a pair of related symbols, we know without question that what has changed, allowing Kosei to play, is Kaori being with him.

- Then there’s the black cats. There are two main black cats in the show, and they are easy to confuse if you aren’t looking for them. There’s the yellow eyed cat and the blue eyed cat. It’s important to note that as a Western viewer, we see a black cat and all of our cultural training makes us think “black cats are bad luck. They work with witches. They bring bad things in stories.” And this is not true in Japan though. Japan, while it has adopted the idea of black cats having an association with witches (pause for kiki, flying witch, and sailor moon), they don’t associate black cats with bad luck at all. In fact they are often associated with GOOD luck in Japan. But the symbolism goes deeper than just that.

I’d argue that the black cats BOTH represent Kosei, but different emotions Kosei feels, parts of his psyche.

The yellow eyed cat often appears while Kosei is trying to playing piano and speaks to him, making him a symbol rather than a real cat. This cat strongly resembles the cat Kosei owned as a child, which scratched his hands and is taken away, forever, by his mother. He often mocks Kosei or talks down to him during performances. In the last scene we see the yellow eyed cat, Kosei overcomes his anxiety and is able to play the piano for his competition

All of this together paints the yellow eyed cat as a symbol of Kosei’s inner turmoil. His self doubt, his regrets, his guilt, all the things that hold him back are embodied in this cat. So when he is able to play again, the cat doesn’t return.

Then we have the blue eyed cat. The blue eyed cat is definitely a REAL cat in the show, and only shows up a few times. It first shows up when Kaori appoints Kosei as her accompanist. She lifts up the blue eyed cat and cradles it, surrounded by cherry blossoms. If we go along with our idea that the cats represent Kosei’s inner self, this cat is the part of him that is drawn to Kaori, his growing love for Kaori. And that Kaori lifts and cradles the cat, feels like a hint that Kaori really loves him back.

The next time we see the cat, it is right after Kaori has been hospitalized. And Kosei finds the cat, hit by a car on the side of the road. He rushes the cat to a vet, but...it’s too late. The cat dies. And it’s hard to not see that as foreshadowing that Kaori’s hospital stay will not have a happy ending.

We do see the blue eyed cat one last time though- or at least, another cat that looks very much like it. It’s possible this cat is related to the dead cat, or maybe isn’t a real cat at all, but a vision like the yellow eyed cat was. It’s not clear. So, Kaori has died. Kosei is in despair. But he sees this cat- the symbol of his love for Kaori, of the hope Kaori gave him, and he decides to read her letter to him. At the very end of the show, Kosei sees the blue eyed cat one last time, on the other side of the train tracks. There one second, and then gone, like a ghost, the next. Even though Kaori is gone, the love and hope Kaori brought to Kosei’s life still exists.

- And if that isn’t devastating enough for you, we have one final metaphor. The damn cherry blossoms. If you’ve watched any amount of anime in your life, you’ve seen the cherry blossom trees in an anime at some point. They are pink and pretty and rain down around characters during dramatic confessions of love. They represent spring, and new beginnings, and new love. Even a western viewer can pick up that much from context.

When Kosei first meets Kaori, she is surrounded by cherry blossoms. When she makes Kosei her accompanist, she’s surrounded by cherry blossoms, in both the first AND second OP, Cherry blossoms surround Kaori. So, this one seems easy, right? Kosei loves Kaori. She’s young and pretty and the love interest. No problem.

Except.

Except there is a double meaning to the cherry blossoms that 1) doesn’t always come up in anime and 2) isn’t as well known to westerners.

You see, Cherry Blossoms only bloom for a very, very short amount of time. So if you google “Cherry Blossom symbolism” nearly any site will tell you the same thing: Cherry blossoms symbolize spring and love and...the precarious nature of life and how life is fleeting. Intense beauty and untimely death. They are beautiful, but only for a short amount of time.

Kaori is the cherry blossoms- sweet and bright and lovely and gone so so quickly.

And show show just! Tells you! This! Right here! Its right in front of us all along!

-heavy sigh- shit. -

Ok, I’m ok.

So. That’s a quick-ish run down of some of the major symbols and metaphors in the show. So, why? Why does this matter?

Well, having metaphors and symbolism like this adds an extra meaning for the viewers. It can help us understand a mood, or make an implied connection. It gives the text and extra layer of depth for viewers to dig into.

I don’t think that every single anime or tv show or movie needs to have this level of symbolism. No one is begrudging Dragonball Z for not having more complex visual metaphors. But I do think that this kind of writing is what takes Your Lie in April and moves it from a sort of run of the mill drama, to a memorable story that sticks with people.

So, yeah. Thanks for watching this video! This channel is still really new, so I always appreciate comments and likes. I’ll be sure to see yall down in the comments. And as always, if you enjoyed listening to this queer millennial feminist with a BA in English, feel free to subscribe.

#your lie in april #shigatsu wa kimi no uso #kimiuso #anime #fandf

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theonyxpath · 4 years

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At this writing, the Scion: Demigod 2e Kickstarter is almost at the half-way point and we’re over 300% funded and have over 1700 backers. Not bad at all for half-way! Of course, we’re also in the slow-down period for a bit coming up, so keep an eye out for the previews, actual plays, and interviews we have scheduled to keep everyone entertained until pledging picks up again!

Fun fact: the joint Kickstarter for Scion: Origin and Scion: Hero launched in September, 2016 – four years ago!

Also, as of this writing, we have attained Stretch Goals including unlocking the Reference Screen, KS backer exclusive T Shirt discount, and are building up the Scion: Demigod Companion with sections on new Boons, creatures, Guides, and followers – and are headed towards the next goal of a section on Solo Play!

Stretch Goals are something we continue to tinker with, and we’ve found that doing an overflow book like many of the Companions is really ideal. Backers get access to even more info about the game they pledged for, and we can create goal thresholds that are chapter-sized and therefore priced to such amounts that are achievable more quickly. Which makes the fun of surpassing an amount and achieving a Stretch Goal regular things backers can look forward to.

But we still also look at other possible goals if the KS can support them with the pledges. Pay bumps for creators is a personal favorite of mine, and some of our crew like Jumpstarts or Fiction, too. And sometimes ideas for Stretch Goal rewards come at us from backers or other sources. We’re always open to hearing ideas.

Terra Firma art by Sam Denmark

What we do try to stay away from these days are Stretch Goal rewards that involve adding new material to the book being KS’d, as we’ve seen that derail getting that main reward out to backers by months and months. I’m also extremely leery of rewards that involve working with another company, at this point. It’s a question of expectation by our backers.

We pretty much always phrase the reward to say that the reward means that we’ll work with the other company to create whatever it is they are creating. Then we do that, and after we do, the company, for all sorts of reasons, doesn’t deliver. We did our part, but folks feel like they simply didn’t get the reward that they were looking forward to. We don’t want that to be anybody’s takeaway from one of our KSs, so I’m avoiding those sorts of rewards for now.

Just today, we received word that Paradox is good with the preview of the WoD Ghost Hunters Kickstarter we sent over, so that’ll be our next one! This is for the 20th Anniversary WoD books, so expect a cool Deluxe book all about investigating the paranormal in the World of Darkness. This book would go with the V20, W20, M20, C20, and especially the Wraith20 game lines.

TC: Aberrant art by Jeff Rebner

Some Things We Discussed at the Meeting Today:

(For what it’s worth as an inside look at the meeting, most of the topics I usually put here as having been discussed during the meeting come from the first part of the meeting where general company issues are brought up and discussed. After that we review the status of the projects that fall under each in-house developer’s supervision and note any concerns based on how the in-house devs have seen things happen with their projects all last week.)

We discussed some Covid-19 repercussions, which are ongoing, including our relationship with Paradox and the WW IPs as Paradox was also slammed by the situations around Covid. Approvals seem to be back on track, at least.

We are still trying to help our printers deliver the various projects that need to get shipped out to KS backers, but we are seeing several of our KS ship outs being dragged out. Don’t worry, James will certainly let backers know if any of these challenges causes us to miss any estimated dates.

In terms of our creators, we have been trying to help everyone keep working on our projects and get through all these upheavals, We had thankfully very few freelances diagnosed with Covid-19, but even if an individual wasn’t themselves affected, we have folks whose friends and relatives were, and people just ground down by it all.

It’s very hard to put all that aside and work out compelling writing and get it on the page. Very few writers write in an iron tower that shuts out the real world. In fact, I’d say that creators need input to have creative output, and if all the input is fraught with existential despair and peril then they are going to have a really hard time turning that into some words about a made-up game world.

Some folks can do just that – their creative output is what they use to block the nastiness of the real world out. Most others, though, and I mean most, have needed a helping hand here and there during all this. Some bailed on assignments, some worked with their devs, and some devs also had issues and worked with our in-house devs.

Let the Streets Run Red art by Ken Meyer, Jr

We did big meetings to talk through things like our “Town Halls” – we have another scheduled for early October – and we had design and productivity meetings and courses by folks like Eddy and Danielle. We hoped these helped, and we’ve seen a lot of our freelancers respond positively to these efforts, so….

Finally, we talked about the latest sale over at Indie Press Revolution – IPR – our sales partners that handle our Deluxe Kickstarter press overruns. And much, much, more, actually! This month we have a sale on Exalted 3rd Edition. The big book itself!

The EX3 sale is now live at IPR:https://www.indiepressrevolution.com/xcart/Deals-and-Specials/

And tomorrow morning around 9am CST the Scarred Lands Players Guide PDF will be free for 24 hrs:https://www.drivethrurpg.com/product/197803/Scarred-Lands-Players-Guide-OGL-5e

That’s it for this week – have a great one, and I’ll be back next week talkin’ atcha about our:

Many Worlds, One Path!

Blurbs!

Kickstarter!

Scion: Demigod Second Edition blew through 300% funding last week, and is devouring all sorts of Stretch Goals! Currently headed for the inclusion of a solo-play set of rules in the Demigod Companion book! Check it out if you haven’t already:

Our Next Kickstarter:

World of Darkness: Ghost Hunters for the 20 Anniversary Editions!

Onyx Path Media!

This week: The folks at Bonus Experience podcast join the Trio for discussion and digression(s)! Bonus Experience consists of Monica and Rai, two queer freelancers who talk with authority about the RPG industry. They looking behind the screen, at the play experience, and the finer details of running and writing games. The podcast updates every other Monday.

As always, this Friday’s Onyx Pathcast will be on Podbean or your favorite podcast venue! https://onyxpathcast.podbean.com/

A Bunch of Gamers gets top billing this week due to their new, fantastic interview with developer Neall Raemonn Price regarding the currently on Kickstarter Scion: Demigod! Check it out and enjoy: https://youtu.be/8TzYDKYQzXw

Two Scion: Demigod videos coming this week, including Vorpal Tales running Scion: Demigod and a Behind the Screen video on Scion too! Tune in on Twitch to watch live!

For anyone new to our media section, you can find us running and playing games over on twitch.tv/theonyxpath pretty much every day of the week! Plus, if you’d like your games hosted there, just get in touch with Matthew Dawkins using the contact link on matthewdawkins.com.

Please give our Twitch channel a follow, as you can find a huge number of videos of all kinds of games being run!

This week on Twitch, expect to see these games and streams running:

Scarred Lands – A Family Affair

Technocracy Reloaded – Vorpal Tales

Scion – Behind the Screen

Scion: Demigod – Vorpal Tales

Danielle’s RPG Development Workshop

Hunter: The Vigil – Cold Cases Forsaken Spaces

Changeling: The Dreaming – The Last Faerie Tale

Mage: The Awakening – Occultists Anonymous

Vampire: The Masquerade – Boston by Night

Hunter: Unbound Anomalies – Devil’s Luck Gaming

Get watching for some fantastic insight into how to run these wonderful games and subscribe to us on Twitch, over at twitch.tv/theonyxpath

Come take a look at our YouTube channel, youtube.com/user/theonyxpath, where you can find a whole load of videos of actual plays, dissections of our games, and more, including:

Changeling: The Dreaming – The Last Faerie Tale – E12 – https://youtu.be/NYI_zgcQqEw

Scarred Lands – Purge of the Serpentholds – S1E15 – https://youtu.be/YdE0czNeYGE

Hunter: The Vigil – Uptown Shadows Episode 4 – https://youtu.be/2qdLBpMu0lE

Realms of Pugmire – Paws and Claws S2E15 – https://youtu.be/7bc5HZxAkFg

Hunter: The Vigil – Uptown Shadows FINALE – https://youtu.be/8yKW18X1m9k

Subscribe to our channel and click the bell icon if you want to be notified whenever new news videos and uploads come online!

Tom Murr continues with his amazing They Came from Beneath the Sea! audio drama over on his YouTube channel! If you’ve not checked out his playlist, here it is: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLDwUZRXJBlcnfjjsQE88RkZ6q5M5v9cGv

Systematic Understanding of Everything is a new Exalted Explainer Podcast by Exalted Dev Monica Speca and Exalted Writer Chazz Kellner that is breaking down Creation in 45 minute chunks in preparation for Exalted Essence.

Their most recent episodes are available over on https://www.exaltcast.com/, with their newest covering the stunning terrifying Abyssals!

The Story Told Podcast continues their Fall of Jiara Exalted chronicle, and you can find their newest episode right here: https://thestorytold.libsyn.com/fall-of-jiara-26

Here’s the Keeper of the Archive covering Scion: Origin and Scion: Hero over on YouTube for your viewing pleasure! https://youtu.be/q2qUE0pJID4

Vorpal Tales assembled their playlist of They Came from Beyond the Grave! actual play episodes, and you can find all six of the episodes of this series right here: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL9fUj4KdqE4BTnVZv9pZUkSk7GpwnyKXG

Please check these out and let us know if you find or produce any actual plays of our games! We’d love to feature you!

Electronic Gaming!

As we find ways to enable our community to more easily play our games, the Onyx Dice Rolling App is live! Our dev team has been doing updates since we launched based on the excellent use-case comments by our community, and this thing is awesome! (Seriously, you need to roll 100 dice for Exalted? This app has you covered.)

We’re told that the App Dev is currently creating an updated version for the latest devices, so keep an eye open for those!

Virtual TableTop!

Introducing a Virtual Tabletop adventure: the Gauntlet of Spiragos for Scarred Lands on Astral TableTop!

Scars of the Divine War, which ended less than 200 years ago, have still not healed. One such scar is the Chasm of Flies, a rent in the earth created when the titan Spiragos the Ambusher was smote down by one of the young gods, Vangal the Ravager. Now, the Chasm is inhabited by spider-eye goblins and their spider allies, but it is also thought to be the resting place of powerful artifacts from that elder age.

Gauntlet of Spiragos is a Scarred Lands adventure designed for 1st level characters, although it can be easily modified for characters of up to 5th level.

Astral TableTop is the easiest way to play any tabletop RPG online, free. Astral already supports popular systems like D&D and Pathfinder, and Astral can support virtually any tabletop roleplaying game. Get started quickly with built-in support for most popular game systems. Whether you’re brand new to TTRPGs or a veteran tabletop gamer, Astral‘s ease-of-use and built in automation is designed to streamline gameplay.

Astral is browser-based and uses the latest technology to streamline your storytelling experience. Connect with your party online and run your campaigns however you like. Astral offers tools optimized for phone, tablet, and desktop devices, no installation required.

Build epic battlemaps using Astral‘s enormous collection of scenery, props, and tokens or upload your own. Pro users gain access to over 12,000+ assets and fresh new packs every month. Add weather, visual effects, triggers, and so much more with easy-to-use tools

Build your own adventure, or choose from pre-generated game kits like Gauntlet of Spiragos. Create character sheets, craft maps, or just jump right in to connect with your friends and start your adventures!

On Amazon and Barnes & Noble!

You can now read our fiction from the comfort and convenience of your Kindle (from Amazon) and Nook (from Barnes & Noble).

If you enjoy these or any other of our books, please help us by writing reviews on the site of the sales venue from which you bought it. Reviews really, really help us get folks interested in our amazing fiction!

Our selection includes these latest fiction books:

Our Sales Partners!

We’re working with Studio2 to provide our traditionally printed books out into your local game stores. Game stores can order via their usual distributors, and can also contact Studio2 directly. And individuals can check out our projects via the links below!

You can pick up the traditionally printed Pugmire and Monarchies of Mau main books, screens, and the official dice through our friends there! https://studio2publishing.com/search?q=pugmire

Now, we’ve added Chronicles of Darkness books such as Changeling: The Lost Second Edition products to Studio2‘s store! See them here: https://studio2publishing.com/collections/all-products/changeling-the-lost

Scion 2e books and other products are available now at Studio2: https://studio2publishing.com/blogs/new-releases/scion-second-edition-book-one-origin-now-available-at-your-local-retailer-or-online

Our Vampire: The Masquerade 5th Edition books are also available from Studio2 in the US: https://studio2publishing.com/products/vampire-the-masquerade-chicago-by-night-sourcebook

Looking for our Deluxe or Prestige Edition books? Try this link! http://www.indiepressrevolution.com/xcart/Onyx-Path-Publishing/

And you can order Pugmire, Monarchies of Mau, Cavaliers of Mars, and Changeling: The Lost 2e at the same link! And now Scion Origin and Scion Hero and Trinity Continuum Core and Trinity Continuum: Aeon are available to order

The EX3 sale is now live at IPR: https://www.indiepressrevolution.com/xcart/Deals-and-Specials/

As always, you can find Onyx Path’s titles at DriveThruRPG.com!

Tomorrow morning around 9am CST the Scarred Lands Players Guide PDF will be free for 24 hrs:https://www.drivethrurpg.com/product/197803/Scarred-Lands-Players-Guide-OGL-5e

On Sale This Week!

This Wednesday we are blasting off and landing back on good old Terra Firma for Trinity Continuum: Aeon! Check out the Advance PDF on DTRPG!

Terra Firma expands the setting of Trinity Continuum: Æon by revealing some of the many wonders and secrets found on Earth and Luna, while also providing Storytellers with the material they require to set exciting campaigns on either of these two worlds.

Terra Firma requires both the Trinity Continuum Core Rulebook and Trinity Continuum: Æon to play. Inside, you will find:

• Further information about 10 nations previously discussed in Trinity Continuum: Æon, including a detailed look at an important city in each nations.

• Details on threats facing Earth, including revolutionary movements, dangerous cults, and criminal gangs.

• An exploration of some of the strange, and often deadly, mysteries found on Earth and Luna — from the ancient and terrible Gorgon Karst caves beneath eastern Europe to the bizarre Hadley Rille Anomaly on Luna.

• New technologies used on Earth, examples of the many strange and powerful relics of the Nova Age, as well as new Edges and Paths specifically for the inhabitants of Earth and Luna.

Conventions!

Though dates for physical conventions are subject to change due to the current COVID-19 outbreak, here’s what’s left of our current list of upcoming conventions (and really, we’re just waiting for this last one to be cancelled even though it’s Nov/Dec). Instead, keep an eye out here for more virtual conventions we’re going to be involved with:

PAX Unplugged: https://unplugged.paxsite.com/

We’re still waiting on word for this one, as a TTRPG publisher we weren’t included in the companies contacted for PAX‘s virtual con replacing their usual electronic gaming con(s).

And now, the new project status updates!

Development Status from Eddy Webb! (Projects in bold have changed status since last week.):

First Draft (The first phase of a project that is about the work being done by writers, not dev prep.)

Exalted Essay Collection (Exalted)

No Gods, No Masters (Scion 2nd Edition)

Scion Fiction Anthology (Scion 2nd Edition)

TC: Aeon Novella: Dawn (Trinity Continuum: Aeon)

TC: Aeon Novella: Meridian (Trinity Continuum: Aeon)

Legacies of Earth (Legendlore)

Once and Future (Scion 2nd Edition)

They Came From Beneath the Sea! Jumpstart (They Came From…!)

They Came From Beyond the Grave! Jumpstart (They Came From…!)

Tales of Depravity! (They Came From…!)

Heroes in a World of Horror! (They Came From…!)

Tome of the Pentacle (Mage: the Awakening 2e)

Redlines

Dragon-Blooded Novella #2 (Exalted 3rd Edition)

Squeaks In The Deep (Realms of Pugmire)

Trinity Continuum: Anima

Prometheus Unbound (was Psi Orders) (Trinity Continuum: Aeon)

Second Draft

Many-Faced Strangers – Lunars Companion (Exalted 3rd Edition)

Hundred Devil’s Night Parade (Exalted 3rd Edition)

Exalted Essence Edition (Exalted 3rd Edition)

Saints and Monsters (Scion 2nd Edition)

M20 Technocracy Operative’s Dossier (Mage: The Ascension 20th Anniversary)

Wild Hunt (Scion 2nd Edition)

The Devoted Companion (Deviant: The Renegades)

Development

TC: Aberrant Reference Screen (Trinity Continuum: Aberrant)

Across the Eight Directions (Exalted 3rd Edition)

Contagion Chronicle: Global Outbreaks (Chronicles of Darkness)

Exigents (Exalted 3rd Edition)

Assassins (Trinity Continuum Core)

Kith and Kin (Changeling: The Lost 2e)

V5 Forbidden Religions (Vampire: The Masquerade 5th Edition)

Trinity Continuum: Adventure! core (Trinity Continuum: Adventure!)

M20 Rich Bastard’s Guide To Magick (Mage: The Ascension 20th Anniversary)

CtL 2e Novella Collection: Hollow Courts (Changeling: The Lost 2e)

Adversaries of the Righteous (Exalted 3rd Edition)

Novas Worldwide (Trinity Continuum: Aberrant)

Manuscript Approval

Crucible of Legends (Exalted 3rd Edition)

Dystopia Rising: Evolution Fiction Anthology (Dystopia Rising: Evolution)

Post-Approval Development

M20 Victorian Mage (Mage: the Ascension 20th Anniversary Edition)

Mission Statements (Trinity Continuum: Aeon)

Contagion Chronicle Ready-Made Characters (Chronicles of Darkness)

The Clades Companion (Deviant: The Renegades)

V5 Children of the Blood (was The Faithful Undead) (Vampire: The Masquerade 5th Edition)

Editing

Lunars Novella (Rosenberg) (Exalted 3rd Edition)

Mummy: The Curse 2nd Edition core rulebook (Mummy: The Curse 2nd Edition)

Player’s Guide to the Contagion Chronicle (Chronicles of Darkness)

TC: Aberrant Jumpstart (Trinity Continuum: Aberrant)

LARP Rules (Scion 2nd Edition)

The Book of Lasting Death (Mummy: The Curse 2e)

Scion: Dragon (Scion 2nd Edition)

Scion: Demigod (Scion 2nd Edition)

Dearly Bleak – Novella (Deviant: The Renegades)

N!ternational Wrestling Entertainment (Trinity Continuum: Aberrant)

Under Alien Skies (Trinity Continuum: Aeon)

Dead Man’s Rust (Scarred Lands)

V5 Trails of Ash and Bone (Vampire: The Masquerade 5th Edition)

Post-Editing Development

W20 Shattered Dreams Gift Cards (Werewolf: The Apocalypse 20th)

Cults of the Blood Gods (Vampire: The Masquerade 5th Edition)

Hunter: The Vigil 2e core (Hunter: The Vigil 2nd Edition)

Trinity Continuum: Aberrant core (Trinity Continuum: Aberrant)

Deviant: The Renegades (Deviant: The Renegades)

Legendlore core book (Legendlore)

One Foot in the Grave Jumpstart (Geist: The Sin-Eaters 2e)

Masks of the Mythos (Scion 2nd Edition)

They Came From Beyond the Grave! (They Came From!)

Heirs to the Shogunate (Exalted 3rd Edition)

Indexing

Art Direction from Mike Chaney!

In Art Direction

Tales of Aquatic Terror – AD’d.

WoD Ghost Hunters (KS) – KS page to Paradox for approval.

Hunter: The Vigil 2e

Mummy 2

Deviant – AD’d.

Legendlore

Technocracy Reloaded – AD’d.

Cults of the Blood God – Artists chugging along.

Scion: Dragon (KS)

Masks of the Mythos (KS)

Scion: Demigod (KS)

They Came From Beyond the Grave! (KS)

TC: Adventure! (KS)

Geist: One Foot In the Grave – Artists are working.

Contagion Chronicle Jumpstart (Chronicles of Darkness) – Breakdown brokedown.

Monsters of the Deep

In Layout

Yugman’s Guide to Ghelspad

Vigil Watch

Trinity Core Jumpstart

Aberrant – 7 out of 12 sections laid out. Art still coming in.

Proofing

Cavaliers of Mars: City of the Towered Tombs

Yugman’s Guide Support Decks (Scarred Lands)

TC Aeon Terra Firma – Sent back to Josh, looking good.

V5 Let the Streets Run Red – Hopefully going to WW this week.

At Press

TCFBTS Screen and Booklet – Files at press.

They Came from Beneath the Sea! – Shipping from printer to KS fulfiller.

Pirates of Pugmire – Shipping from printer to KS fulfiller.

Pirates of Pugmire Screen – Files at press.

Dark Eras 2 – Files printing.

Dark Eras 2 Screen and booklet – Files at press.

Contagion Chronicle – Press prep, PoD files uploaded and ordered.

Contagion Chronicle Screen and Booklet – Files at press.

Lunars Wall Scroll Map – Shipping to KS fulfiller from printer.

Lunars Screen and Booklet – Files at press.

Lunars: Fangs at the Gate – Prepping files for PoD and press.

Scarred Lands Creature Collection – Shipping from printer to KS fulfiller.

Sunken Bones – Pugmire pirate adventure – Closing errata.

Titanomachy – Errata collecting from Advance PDF.

Today’s Reason to Celebrate!

In two days it will be the 9th anniversary of the release of Vampire: 20th Anniversary Edition at the Grand Masquerade in New Orleans! Soooo much has happened since then! V20 led to renewed interest in TTRPGs at WW, which led to Eddy and I doing those in-house, which led to me thinking I could be happy with my own TTRPG company, which led to Onyx Path Publishing!

#Onyx Path Publishing

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