#but hopefully people can decide for themselves what fits best

[svsss-fanon-exposed]

Examining SVSSS Canon: 1/∞

SHEN YUAN'S PIDW-READING TIMELINE

One question and argument that comes up frequently in SVSSS fandom is, how long did Shen Yuan read PIDW for? Was he following it from early serialization, or did he simply binge everything toward the end?

This question isn't exactly one that is easy to answer either-- considering that there are actually various direct quotes that could be read in contradiction to one another regarding it.

Based on the information in the novel, we are left with several potential theories as to Shen Yuan's reading timeline. In this post, I will be presenting these theories, along with supporting evidence from the novel.

Theory #1: Shen Yuan picked up PIDW and binge-read it from beginning to end for the first time in 20 days before dying

This theory is directly supported with a quote:

He’d spent twenty days binging the novel from start to finish, so he had clean forgotten that whump-filled arc of pointless abuse that covered Luo Binghe’s beginnings at the sect, okay?! (7 Seas, Ch. 1)

In the original text, this line is 他可是看了二十天才看完的. Broken down, this is literally "he indeed read it (他可是看了), it took him twenty days (二十天才）to read the whole [novel] (看完的)."

*note 可是 may also be equivalent to "however" or "but" in some circumstances, but is generally used to provide emphasis.

However, depending on where one puts the emphasis and pairs syllables in the last part, there could be different interpretations. If read as 看 完的 it implies "read the entire thing," but if read as 看完 的，it implies "finished reading." I read it the first way, but I don't know if that is the "most correct," so there is some ambiguity there.

It is also implied later that PIDW was already very long and full of plot holes when he began reading it:

So, if back when he’d just opened this baffling book, this Proud Immortal Demon Way, which was so full of landmines that it was practically high art, to the point that those landmines had become its very style... He would definitely have grabbed the brick that was the entire fifty-volume set and showed them what their brains looked like when splattered across the ground. (7 Seas, Ch. 21)

Though this could be related to the final length of the novel, and the "fifty-volume set" is likely exaggeration or metaphor. In one of his forum posts, he also says:

I understand what OP is feeling. I’ve been reading this novel lately, and it’s so damn long—long and pumped full of filler... ...All my fellow readers have already roasted the setting for the last three hundred thousand words, so I won’t say more on that. (7 Seas, Ch. 26)

This part where he says he has been reading the novel lately, implies that he began not too long ago, rather than following it for years. Of course, Airplane already at this point finds his username and comments familiar:

His eyes automatically highlighted that familiar ID “Peerless Cucumber.” (7 Seas, Ch. 26)

So it could also be said that he is downplaying his dedication with that statement. He does, however, state that the other readers have roasted the setting, but doesn't mention that he himself has done so. Additionally, the "three-hundred thousand words" mentioned may refer to the comment section, not the novel itself, so there is still some ambiguity to that point.

Theory #2: Shen Yuan has been reading PIDW long-term throughout serialization

There are multiple quotes directly supporting this theory:

He could guarantee it on all the youth and frustrations he’d wasted following this twenty-million-word-plus serialization for years. (7 Seas, Ch. 6)

and

Everything that had happened before was as unto smoke. From today forth, as he walked the jianghu, he would use this ID, which had been plastered all over the comments section for years. (7 Seas, Ch. 9)

The second quote may refer to comments sections on Zhongdian literature in general, but the first one is more directly referring to PIDW. There is a slim but unlikely possibility that he referrs to the years he has spent within the PIDW universe, rather than just reading the novel. That possibility is made even less likely by the following quote:

Next, let a veteran reader of this novel, Shen Yuan, omit the countless fanservice-y details and concisely summarize the million-word epic for everyone… (7 Seas, Ch. 1)

Where it refers to him as a veteran reader of PIDW specifically (and this TL is consistent with the original implications). It's unlikely for him to be referred to as a veteran reader if he had only been reading the novel for twenty days.

As one can see, if you go by either of the above theories, there are direct conflicts and contradictions, and arguments to be made either way. This could be written off as inconsistency. However, there are two additional options and theories which can resolve those conflicts.

Theory #3: Shen Yuan had been a casual reader of PIDW for years, but rushed to finish reading it through to the end in 20 days

One possibility is that Shen Yuan had been reading PIDW casually over several years, but wasn't caught up by the time his death drew near. Shen Yuan's cause of death is a matter for another post, so I won't discuss it here, but the following quote lends some support to this reading:

“Dumbfuck author, dumbfuck novel!” With his dying breath, Shen Yuan spat this final curse. Who could have imagined that an upstanding young man like him—who had properly purchased the website’s VIP currency and read the novel’s official version—would find himself persevering before his untimely death to finish a novel so stallion, so money-grubbing and overly padded, that it left him speechless with rage? How could he not curse? (7 Seas, Ch. 1)

Here, it seems that Shen Yuan may have been aware of his upcoming death, and so he may have wanted to hurry and finish reading the novel before he died. In the original text, the phrase is: 临终之前坚持看完的, which can be broken down as "before his untimely/sudden death (临终之前), he persisted to finish reading [the novel] (坚持看完的）, though this may also be read as "he persisted in reading the entire novel," depending on how one puts emphasis in the sentence (same issue as the first quote in theory 1). 临终 means literally "near the end," but is a term for death or one's deathbed. Another way to translate 临终之前 would be "before meeting his end."

So, because he was persisting/persevering in finishing the novel (either the whole thing or just to the end), it may be that he expected his incoming death, or that he simply wished to persist in reading the novel to its end and his death still occured unexpectedly.

坚持 implies some level of urgency or steadfastness, but it may not refer to reading the novel quickly, but simply dedication to slogging through all of the bad porn and reading it to the end, rendering this theory a bit shaky.

Theory #4: Shen Yuan had been reading PIDW since early serialization, but re-read the entire thing in the 20 days before his death

This theory would resolve all potential conflicts-- making it true that he both followed PIDW's serialization for years and read the whole novel in 20 days. As to why he re-read the full novel, perhaps it was because the final chapter had been posted or was coming up, and he wished to reread from the start in preparation for that-- this could also drive him into an even greater rage about the contents of the novel and how repetitive and filler-heavy it is, as this would become more and more obvious on a binge-reread from start to end.

One weakness in this theory, though (pointed out by @verycharismaticdragon) is that if he read it twice, it would be less likely for him to completely forget details as mentioned in the first quote. Not entirely impossible-- one can still forget details even after multiple read-throughs, but just less likely to completely forget.

Theory #5: When Shen Yuan began reading PIDW, he binged all available chapters in twenty days, before following it consistently afterwards.

(theory courtesy of @verycharismaticdragon)

While this would not be particularly likely if the quote from theory 1 and the quote from theory 3 were linked together, those two quotes don't necessarily have to be linked-- it's possible that Shen Yuan would have binged the entire novel as it was at the time he found it in twenty days, then decided to continue reading as it updated, persisting and persevering because he wanted to reach the end despite the novel's trashiness, and then ended up dying.

Particularly, this makes a lot of sense in the context of the following quote:

Even though this famous Lord Cucumber spewed criticism constantly and without end in “Great Master” Airplane’s comments sections, his subscription payments and demands for updates never waned. (7 Seas, Ch. 26)

If Shen Yuan hadn't been caught up with the novel (as theory 3 would state) then it wouldn't make quite so much sense for him to be demanding updates, and if he hadn't been reading it for even a full month, there was no reason for him to make consistent subscription payments.

*******

Ultimately, which theory you choose to believe depends somewhat on the way you view canon-- whether the seemingly contradicting statements were intentional, or whether they were merely a consistency error.

These are the only theories that I can think of, but feel free to add any additional theories + support quotes and analysis if you have them!

One final note, in regards to WHEN DID SHEN YUAN START READING?

If it's true that Shen Yuan began reading PIDW earlier in serialization, how early was that point? Was he reading it from the beginning, or did he start later?

I personally believe it was later. Though he says he was following the novel for years, that could mean anywhere from two to four years since the total serialization of PIDW took place over four years:

How could someone who’d cursed “dumbfuck author, dumbfuck novel” remember ancient content from the beginning of a serialized novel that had been running for four years and covered an in-narrative span of two hundred years? (7 Seas, Ch. 1)

While it's hard to place exactly when he started reading, it seems that Shen Yuan began to read PIDW before the Immortal Alliance Conference arc, as he discusses the novel's online performance before that point:

Before this event, Proud Immortal Demon Way’s performance online had been steadfastly lukewarm. But once the Immortal Alliance Conference Arc debuted, the reviews, comments, subscriptions, and tips all soared into the heavens. It wasn’t only because from that point forward, “Great Master” Airplane Shooting Towards the Sky abandoned the last of his already minimal moral principles... there was another important “it” factor. It was, in fact, the main element that had first compelled Shen Qingqiu to follow the novel until the end. The demonic beasts! (7 Seas, Ch. 4)

It also seems that he wasn't entirely dedicated to reading the novel before then. However, he may have caught up with the serialization a bit later-- for example, if he started reading just before the conference, he would have known that it was a little-known novel before, and been able to watch the rise in popularity in real time even if he himself hadn't caught up to the conference just yet, before only deciding to dedicate to reading the full novel once he caught up to that part.

There are many possibilities and uncertainties in regards to Shen Yuan's reading timeline, but I do think there is enough information here to form decently solid theories-- so I will leave it to my readers to decide, now that the information has been presented, which ones they think are most likely and which they wish to use in their analysis.

[beaker1636]

Alphabet Game Bonus - Christmas Celebration

AN: So I made a group Christmas mini story, it is full of Motionless jokes between the guys. I wanted it to be lighthearted Christmas with the boys and to also give everyone a bit of a laugh as we remember some of the jokes that are in the fandom :) I hope you all enjoy. I know it is a bit of a joke chapter, not as serious but I had a request for Christmas with the guys and that made me think of this. Hope you Enjoy!!

“Why did we agree to host Christmas here while I am actively moving in again?” Lottie asks, turning towards Vinny who is standing next to her with a box in his hands.  Questioning why she let him talk her into this, and why they decided to move her in a week before Christmas rather than waiting for the holiday to die down.

“Because we are all helping you and are here, so it made sense to do the gift exchange after we get all your stuff in here,” Chris says with a smile, walking in the room with a box as well behind the couple. “But we can move dinner to our place and do the gifts there if you would feel better, Carlotta,” he adds.  Knowing Mia may not be the happiest about it last minute but she would understand.

“No, it’s fine.  I’m just overwhelmed with the move is all. Thank you for helping us with this.  I appreciate all of you guys,” she says, turning towards all the guys who are bringing the last of the boxes into the dining room.  The girls have all stationed themselves in the various rooms of the house to help unpack things, helping Lottie have one last thing to worry about during all of this.

“That’s what we are here for,” Mia calls from her place in the kitchen.

“Why don’t we stop and order the chinese that we agreed on, we can take a break once it arrives and do our Secret Santa gifts.  I can handle doing the rest of this alone,” Lottie says with a smile, her way of telling all the guys to go find their girlfriends so that they can stop and get going on everything else.

When they all wander off to do that she turns towards Vinny, pulling him into a kiss for a moment.  Relishing in the happiness that she does feel about taking this step with him, moving in together, things have been going great with them since their trip with his family awhile ago and the two of them have felt a lot closer.

“Busted,” Naomi jokes as she walks into the room, catching her best friend off guard, making Lottie flip her off with a smile before pulling away from Vinny, everyone making their way to the living room getting ready to eat dinner together.  

While it isn’t homemade, nothing special they all enjoyed it.  It was fitting for them, all any of them ever have cared about is the friendship and bond they have made together.  A lot of people would think that the band would want nothing to do with each other while not working but they genuinely love and care for each other. When someone needs help with anything they join in and get it done, much like they all did today.  

Carlotta looked around the room, watching everyone gathered, many people sitting on the floor due to not having enough chairs and could almost tear up.  Not having a stable relationship with her own family makes her appreciate this that much more, they wouldn’t have done this for her especially so close to the holiday but her friends all did.  Making sure that they were there to help with what she needed, and she hasn’t even been part of the group that long.  

Vin can tell that she is thinking, getting lost in her head so he reaches out to grab her hand, squeezing it and letting her know that he is there for her without saying it while they listen to Chris tell some sort of story, that has a majority of the room laughing.  Everyone was laughing and smiling as they enjoyed the time together, finishing up their meal before moving on to the Secret Santa game.

“Okay, I’ll give mine first.  We all stuck to the joke gifts right? Hopefully.  Anyway I drew Vinny,” Chris said, handing Vinny a gift box with a smirk on his face.

“Do I even want to know what the fuck you came up with?” Vinny asks as he starts to open the box.  Pausing before letting out a laugh and pulling out a T-shirt. “It says, I’ve got these two plastic forks with a photo of plastic knives.”

Everyone instantly starts laughing, remembering the time Vinny said it and Chris had to correct him, that he had knives.  Another funny memory that they have all amassed over the years, that always makes them laugh when they talk about it.  

“I love the fact we all agreed to basically roast each other with our gifts.  Okay, well I drew Ryan and yeah, I was kind of an asshole,” Vinny says, trying not to laugh as he hands his over to Ryan.

Ryan opens the box and immediately has a grin on his face when he closes it for a moment to let out a laugh. He then reopens it and pulls out a little kids toy watch. “The card says because you are always late and oversleep.” He says with a grin. “You aren’t wrong, maybe I won’t miss my flight now, thanks man. Now my turn, I pulled Chris.”

Chris takes his package while rolling his eyes, hoping that he won’t get anything too stupid but also hoping that he will just for the fun of the entire thing.  “Of course it is a Jizzerless in White hat, why would it not be,” he says with a shit eating grin.  “We need to keep this tradition for next year, honestly.  I love it.  I’ll have to share it on twitter later. And that means Justin and Ricky got each other.  And I for one can’t wait to see what that will bring.”

“Justin can open his first,” Ricky says without hesitating, handing his over to the taller man with a shit eating grin. “I promise it isn’t that mean, well maybe it is but.”

“Nah, why don’t you go first Rick.  I insist,” Justin responds, giving him a bag too while staring him down. 

“Just do it at the same fucking time, problem solved children,” Ari said with a laugh, watching the two fight like toddlers.

They both turn and look at her with a look before doing so, both glaring at the other after opening their own and realizing what it was.  Rick pulled his out of the box for everyone to see, it being a thing of movie theater butter and salt for microwave popcorn.

“You dick, it is not the same thing,” he groans with a slight smile on his face.

“Yeah and you got me a large box of popcorn so you also were throwing that argument in my face, so you are just as much a douchebag for this too,” Justin says, laughing when it hit him that they both thought of the same thing to give each other.

This is the one that made the entire group laugh, everyone recalling having to hear about the popcorn argument they had, and that they still whine about off and on to this day.   Both of them are too stubborn to agree with the other despite the fact it does taste very similar.

“Did you girls do this too or did you do something different?” Chris asks once everyone settles down, turning towards Mia with a smile. “I would love to see how you roast each other like we did.”

“No, we all exchanged books instead, figuring we would leave the fun for you.  Though now I am regretting that we did not do that as well because this was hilarious honestly. We already handed the books out earlier today when we were taking a break from moving things.  I will say that it will be fun watching them read some of mine because we all know my tastes are darker than the others,” Mia responds with a smirk.

“Yeah, but you all got stuck with some of my hockey romances and I know that isn’t your cup of tea.  So I would say we are slowly going to be even,” Lottie responds with a smile, her fingers threading with Vinnys.

“And I gave all of you the demon series I liked, I have a feeling that we all are going to be messaging each other going what the fuck is wrong with you, reading this shit,” Naomi says with a laugh, meeting her friends eyes for a moment before looking away.

“Listen, after you all made us read that chapter of Haunting Adeline out loud awhile ago I don’t think any of us want to know what exactly it is you are reading so you can keep that to yourself,” Ryan says with a laugh, squeezing Ari’s hand.

Everyone continues to laugh and enjoy the night, enjoying all the inside jokes that were brought back with the gag gifts they all got each other.  This is what it is all about, spending the time with those that they care about, enjoying being with one another and laughing with one another.   Being part of their own family that the boys have created with their band and have eventually added the girls into it, and nobody would change that.

[ideatradingpost]

ABOUT THE IDEA TRADING POST

(it's a bit of a longer read, but hopefully it will clear up and confusion & provide all necessary information. thank you to everyone who takes the time to read it!)

what is the point of this blog?

this blog is meant as a collaborative, community-building project among artists, writers, and creatives. it is meant to offer new life to stories and characters whose creators can't or don't want to work on them themselves, but want to give a chance at being worked on by others. ultimately, this blog is for fun, collaboration, and celebrating each other's ideas & work.

how does credit work for submissions?

submitters may choose to identify themselves as the original creators of submitted stories or characters when sending them in, or they may submit anonymously. submissions will be made with the agreement that once they are sent in and posted, credit to the original creator will not be necessary, as the ideas will be available to anyone who wants to use them.

(NOTE: as with many public domain creative works, credit is still often appreciated by the original creators, but again on this blog it should not be expected and will not be required. in general it is a good practice to recognize others that contribute to a story / character / etc as collaborators, but this will be different in different circumstances, and will be up to the individuals who are participating in the blog to decide how to approach for themselves. in general, do your best to be kind and considerate to your fellow creatives with this in mind.)

what about ownership / intellectual property / etc?

this project is not meant to be concerned with ownership or intellectual property. the stories and characters submitted to the project would be open to anyone to use or adapt, making them more or less public domain stories and characters (though this is not an official designation; just a collective agreement). participation in the project means agreeing to the fact that, as a collaborative community endeavor, no single person would own the stories or characters once they've been submitted.

that said, what an artist or writer goes on to create with the ideas given here is still there own, as much as a piece of art using a public domain background would be—but keep in mind that anyone else can also use what's posted here as well, as two artists could both work with that same public domain background, to continue the metaphor.

how do I submit?

the best way to submit is via the submission function, where you can craft a post with as much information as you want (and images, if you so choose) to be reviewed by the organizers of the blog, and then posted. submissions may also be sent via the askbox.

what can I submit?

anything you like! story plots, general story ideas (long or short), world concepts, character descriptions, character designs, creative project ideas—the list goes on. send an ask if you're unsure if what you want to submit will fit here.

what is NOT allowed in submissions?

submissions containing hateful or discriminatory content will not be posted. mature themes and content are allowed, but will be marked and/or filtered accordingly. explicit sexual content will not be posted to the blog. feel free to send an ask if you are unsure if your submission would be acceptable for the blog.

what if I submit a story / character then change my mind and don't want anyone else to use it?

the organizers of the blog will try to be as sympathetic as possible to people who request to have stories / characters taken down, but once ideas are shared with the community, we can't prevent anyone from engaging with them, so be sure to think through the things you want to submit and only do so if you're sure about submitting. as a community, though, I hope we can be sensitive and compassionate in how we handle ideas and interact with one another, and so if such a situation does arise, we will all do our best to help each other out.

please send an ask with additional questions / if you need anything clarified!

[strawberry-lemonade-kisses]

Note - This is NOT Muichiro X reader, Muichiro sees the reader as a mother figure. Part of the Himejima found family AU

Late nights are when you found the most peace, living with three people who were still regaining their strength from a battle that left them permanently scarred and changed forever had you working around the clock, taking care of everyone but yourself. So when the sun went down and your family went to bed with it you stayed up, taking a few hours to yourself. Tonight was the last night you would have to yourself for a week. The remaining 3 hashira had decided to bring themselves and their family to your home for a week, having a family vacation in your home. It was special tonight, an extra night of pampering before endless work hosting guests and taking care of your family. After an extended amount of time relaxing in the hot springs a little ways away from your estate, you decided to relax in the back gardens. It was a clear night the stars were so bright, adding an ample amount of light to the garden you worked tirelessly on before the fight. Frogs croaked an old tune, one that had consistently lured you into the most peaceful sleep, but tonight it was a song that kept you awake, humming along to the tune. “Mom?” A smaller voice cut through the song, interrupting the melody and throwing you off track. “what are you doing?” Muichiro stepped out of the house, his kimono dragging behind him.

“I’m watching the stars sweetheart, come lay down” You scooted over on the quilt you were resting on. Allowing Muichiro to lay beside you. “what are you doing awake? You are always asleep by now. Are you in pain? Do you want me to make you something to eat? Tea?” You were getting up from the ground when Muichiro made a noise of disapproval, asking you to sit back down. “I just couldn’t sleep, no big deal. I’ve been thinking a lot” he lay on his back, looking at the stars. “Did I ever tell you about my brother? He reminds me of Sanemi sometimes. He was angry and rough on the outside, but he had good reason to be the way he was. He was trying to protect me, wanted to keep me safe. When we lost our parents he was angry at the world for betraying us as it had, but we still had each other.” You smiled at the boy. “You’ve had a very hard life, Mui. Your family did their best for you and each other. The world is a cruel place to the best of us. But you are here now, you’ve made it. Your family's sacrifices weren't for nothing.” The younger boy turned to you. “I’ve been thinking a lot. About what to do now. My father was a woodcutter but I couldn’t do that now, what can I do?” “Mui you can do anything you want now. Get proper sleep, and eat full meals. You don’t have to fight anymore, you can rest now. Be a regular 14-year-old boy. What do you want to do? Not what you think you should do. What do you want?” He sat quietly, contemplating what he truly wanted. He gave up after a few seconds shrugging. “well you got time to figure it out, for now just relax. Everyone is visiting tomorrow including Tanjiro and them for a party and then the Uzui’s, Sanemi, and Giyuu are staying for the rest of the week so just try to enjoy yourself. Also, I was told Kotetsu is coming in a few weeks once things settle down with the moves and everything. Now that they are out of work they’ve been moving out of the mountains and towards Tokyo I guess. It'll be interesting to hear about that. Maybe then they can finally work on Hotaru’s social skills. Find him a nice wife to ease him out” Muichiro giggled at the thought. He had carefully retold the story of Hotaru’s blind date failure. From what he had been told it was going well until the woman had spoken about the fact that swords and swordsmen were unneeded in today's society. Which Hotaru took very personally and subsequently ended the date right there. It was understandable but he threw a fit for days following the date and had worried the village chief.

“Yeah, hopefully, they all can live peacefully now” You nodded, settling further into the quilt as your eyes perused the endless stars in the sky. “Hey Mom” you hummed, turning towards him. “do you think it’s going to be okay now? That everyone will know it's safe?” “Well, I’m not sure. I figure it’ll take some time before everyone knows they don’t have to worry anymore about the demons. Eventually, I think there will be a time when people completely forget demons were a thing and it’s all thanks to you guys. You did this. I’m very proud of you, all of you. I’m so grateful I got all of you back home, I feel spoiled like a light was shined on upon me for being able to wake up with all of you in the house, alive and well.” Muichiro looked away, a watery chuckle coming from him. “Thanks, Mom” He shook his head, moving to get up “I’m going to actually sleep now. Goodnight Mom” he paused after a few steps towards the house, turning around to where you sat watching him leave. “I love you, thank you for everything” With a soft smile the boy turned back towards the house, disappearing into the darkness of the hallways.

[writeblrsvoid]

Excuse this absolute essay of an ask. I had thoughts.

I decided to add a new dynamic into my storywriting because I saw a commentary about how media always saying that the villain has to die is actually a Not Great Thing. Basically, from now on, the only time a villain is going to die in my story is if they Absolutely Cannot Change. It's actually added some really interesting solutions into my storywriting now that I'm not killing off the villains, because their motivations and their ideals significantly influence the results of the story.

Like, let me explain. In one instance, the villain believes that the stronger force in life will always prevail. She's defeated by the protagonists, which is normally when the villain would be killed in, say, a Disney or Dreamworks movie (think HTTYD, Mulan, Tangled, Shrek, etc.) Since it fits with her ideals, though, she actually surrenders once she's been defeated because, to her, she was not the stronger force.

It does have an interesting consequence in that, sometimes, an abusive side villain doesn't die, either. (Before anyone asks, I am an abuse victim.) It's not a guarantee of either thing, and isn't even a guarantee that the villain will turn good, but I approached it more with the idea of "The victim doesn't need their abuser's apology to move on, and the abuser doesn't need their victim's forgiveness to change" because both of those would put the victim in a bad situation. Again, this comes back to the villain always dying being a Not Great Thing. The villains are still facing consequences--all of them lose reputation, their positions of power, etc.--but I think it's more a valuable lesson to be learned that yes, you can be an awful person, but you still have the capacity to change. Also, I think in some cases it's more fitting for the villains to have to face the consequences of their choices in life than it is for them to die but never have to deal with the repercussions that their victims have to.

Of course, then I get back to the case of the villains who will have to die. I do have a couple villains like this, and it's mostly that they have to die simply because they won't stop until they get what they want. I'm not a huge fan of the villain having to die (because, again, it's not a lesson I want to teach my audience), but I think in some ways it's a disrespect to them as a character to not kill them in some cases. Like, say a character is incredibly determined to do this One Thing, and at the second they almost have the One Thing, they suddenly give up. One of my other villains is kind of like this--he wants to stop this One Thing from happening, and to do that he has to kill everyone who could cause this One Thing, including our protagonist. It feels like a disrespect to him for him to get defeated by our protagonist and suddenly decide that he no longer wants to stop this One Thing when he's been working for years to get it, and is willing to die to stop it.

Anyways, I guess this kind of just boils down to my wanting to deal with the complexity of media and how it can affect people, while also trying to respect the decisions of my characters to the best of my ability. Hopefully it makes some sense. Oh, just to clarify, I'm not saying that "oh, every abuser can change", because that's not what happens in my works and the only reason the ones I'm thinking of got a chance was because I realized I was running into the same faults I was judging others for, and also it made for a more interesting storyline for them to change. I think it just does a disservice to the complexity of human nature to not take into account that people are, in and of themselves, very messy, and including the villains in that makes me feel like my works have more life to them. The three I mentioned all do face some pretty major consequences for their actions, but it does fit their drive--and also, at least two of them are abuse victims themselves, and I wanted to include the idea that even abuse victims who became abusers have the capacity to change. They all show shame for their actions, which is why they're allowed to in the first place.

Most of this was also inspired by Andrew Taint in that it made me want to write books featuring young, male protagonists who teenage and preteen boys could look up to as role models (these characters make mistakes, they apologize, they cry, they're messy and rough at the edges but still good people) because I saw some of the young men around me suffering from the thought process that they were evil and couldn't change, so there was no point in doing so. It's just important to me to establish how powerful the willingness to change is and using media is one way for me to do that. I totally understand how some of this could come off as really wrong, though, especially to anyone else who's an abuse victim.

Thanks for reading my rambling, though. I appreciate the time and effort you put into this blog a lot, because it makes it easier to talk to someone about my works when I can't necessarily do that in real life. Hope you have a lovely day!

First of all, it is no one's business whether or not you're an abuse victim. You are able to draw powerful life lessons from experiences you've never had if you do so respectfully, so the fact that you felt you had to share that you're an abuse victim... you don't. People need to get their heads out of their asses and stop acting like everyone else's lives are any of their business. You're allowed your privacy.

That said, this is a super complex topic and I personally feel that you're doing an amazing job at addressing it and that your thought processes on all of it are really on the right track. :) keep it up! I'm super proud of you and what you're trying to do and the lessons you're trying to portray. :) you're doing amazing work, so don't let others feeling any sort of way deter you. You will touch and reach people.

Every piece of writing on touchy topics will offend some people. It's just the nature of humanity. Just remember you're doing it for the people that you're going to help, not the ones that will yell about it. :)

Thank you for sharing.

[canis-or-cannotis-lycaon]

TIMING: Early August LOCATION: A Latte to Love PARTIES: Gael (@lithium-argon-wo-l-f and Wynne (@ohwynne SUMMARY: Back to work perhaps a little sooner than they should considering everything that happened at the barn, Wynne struggles with overloading emotions and unreasonable customers. Fortunately, Gael picks up on this and offers to help. CONTENT WARNINGS: Nnnnone, I don't think

It was absurd to be back here. To stand behind the till and take people’s orders and write them on cups and then to hand the cup to their colleague and to then ring the order up and then ask cash or card? and then wait until they chose and then click the right button and let them pay and tell them to have a good day. Again, and again, and again. Wynne had once liked this monotonous rhythm, had liked the small talk, the breeziness of it all — but now they felt like they were going to collapse if one more person very expressly said they wanted that with oat, you hear me, not cow’s milk.

Admittedly, they had messed that up a few times this week. But it was hard to care, when they had nearly been transformed into what others called a spawn, when they had almost died of blood loss. Wynne kept retreating to the backroom, trying to do breathing exercises and failing at them. They were afraid they were going to get fired and then thought so what?

But the day went on. A quiet stretch of time followed. Janeen went to take stock in the back, telling them to call if things got busy. Wynne stared into space. They dug an icecube from the freezer and let it melt in their hand, because that too was an exercise they’d read about. And then the door opened and they dropped the thing, sure to make the ground wet, eyes flicking up at the new patron. They had liked predicting what drinks customers would like, and with this man? They’d been almost right the first time he’d entered. His face wasn’t wholly unfamiliar, but his features were the only thing they remembered about him at present. “Hi, welcome to a Latte to Love,” they said, trying not to drone the words. “What can I get ready for you today?”

—

Ahhh he felt full of life. Between his progress with Ren, hanging out with Alan on the full moon and the conversation with Regan, this was the best Gael had felt since… well, the accident would be too long, but definitely in the last month or so. It was always one of Gael’s goals to let his expression and demeanor betray the sunken features on his face, the stylishly-disheveled hair that flopped over his forehead and his loose-fitting clothes that accentuated comfort over professionalism. He was in hobo mode right now, satisfied with where he was in life and committed to wandering through town with his aching bones, sore body . Gael had werewolf friends, that was fine and he’d do everything in his power to empower them, make them feel safe from murderers who ran around calling themselves ‘hunters’. He didn’t doubt their capability and strength and he certainly didn’t disparage them for their strange quirks and what they called themselves. He tried to be that way with everyone. Including today, where Gael decided to visit a Latte to Love, the place that already held memories, both good and bad - he’d talked to Cass in the corner where he looked as he entered the establishment about her interest in rocks and good vs. evil. It was also where he’d gotten drinks with Leticia before that night where he carelessly put her and the jaguar in danger. Right now was a chance to make another hopefully good memory and he approached the counter, his dark eyes dancing over a young - out of habit, his eyes darted over the pins on their vest - individual with exciting hair and eyes that seemed like normally they should’ve been much more full of youthful vigor. Nevertheless, he gave them a warm smile that easily reached the corners of his eyes; he treated retail and food service workers with a special kind of care. “Hi.” Gael said softly, giving the employee a soft look. “How are you doing today?” This part was a toss-up; half the time, they gave him a look like they really didn’t want to engage in small talk but he always took that risk just in case that wasn’t what happened.

—

He was just being polite, they told themself. He was just asking out of habit. And it was a good habit, a kind habit, one that could make a difference in someone’s day — but it was still habit, wasn’t it? He didn’t want the full answer, the ugly and gritty. He surely didn’t want them to open their mouth and let out a sound rather than a verbal response, because some mangled noise might be the best answer to that question. But Wynne didn’t do such a thing.

No, even if this was a customer who was generally kind and patient, they knew that he wouldn’t want them to be truthful. There was no room for it. And yet, their mind got stuck on it, that question and their answer. Bad, their mind answered, I’m doing really bad. I wish I hadn’t dropped my ice cube. I wish I knew how to do this thing called life. I’m questioning existence itself. I almost died! I am not doing great today and we are out of oat milk and people keep being mad about it. Someone spat out their almond croissant on a plate and I had to clean it. I almost died. I have to wear this scarf because having my wound on display will upset customers, or so my manager says, and I don’t want questions to be asked but it’s so hot! But I’m also very cold at the same time. I almost died I almost died I almost died I almost died, I’m not doing okay.

They said none of it, though.

Why couldn’t he just tell them his coffee order, so they could punch it in and let themself fall into the rhythmic and familiar movements of making the coffee. Wynne blinked at the customer, realizing that they’d been quiet for far too long. They wiped their wet hand on their apron. “Oh, haha, you know, fine,” they said, lacking conviction. “Little tired, maybe? How are you?” Their gaze turned to the cash register, then back to the other. “What can I get started for you? Um, just so we know, we are out of oat milk.

—

The employee was quiet for a long moment, longer than someone who wasn’t thinking about something somewhere else, a different time, place, person. They weren’t daydreaming though, Gael could also tell. Something was on their mind, obviously. The professor inhaled, letting his dark eyes dance over their figure, their hair, the exhaustion under their eyes; he was familiar with that. He was also familiar with wearing articles of clothing that were unusual for the weather, as he eyed the scarf around their neck when it was hot outside and comfortable in the shop, not to mention he knew how uncomfortably warm it could get behind the counter when business picked up; they were hiding something. An injury, maybe, or a deformity. So, perhaps in an attempt to resonate with them, Gael adjusted his position on the counter, reaching into his pocket, pulling out a small paper hat made from a shiny silver gum wrapper. He placed it on the counter with his left hand, the hand that had the snakelike trail of scarring that wrapped around his wrist, the back of his palm and a couple of his fingers. “It’s a little hot to be wearing a scarf,” He muttered, giving the employee a look that implied that he’d been there, done that. With that, he leaned back casually and glanced up at the menu. “What do you recommend? That doesn’t have oat milk, of course.” He laughed. “I’ll only bother you for a little while longer, I pizza with toppings.”

—

They misinterpreted that. This was a fault Wynne had, though it was something they were often unaware of — there were so many nuances in the way people spoke and acted that were lost upon them that it was hard to keep track of all they missed. Especially now. Especially at work. When the customer pointed out the scarf they just thought he was trying to ask why they were wearing it. Thinking it suspicious or strange. The look in his eyes meant nothing to them, because they didn’t even want to think about people being able to relate to this.

They looked at him for a moment. “It’s fine, it’s pretty cool in here with the air conditioning. I have a little throat issue.” It wasn’t even a lie, but it became one when they added: “It’s scratchy. A summer cold, maybe?” Wynne lifted their shoulders, nervously playing with the frills at the end of the scarf. It wasn’t thick. It could just be a fashion statement. Underneath it, muscles moved with nervousness and threatening upset, skin pulling at that ugly wound. There was a glassy quality to their eyes now.

“Uh, any iced latte. Elderflower syrup goes nice with the weather,” they said, a recommendation given to plenty of people. Their voice jumped an octave, trembling as they continued, “Pizza … we don’t have pizza, sir. Just like the oat milk. But … well, we never have pizza.”

—

He shouldn’t have pushed, he was being too nosy again. Of course it was their business what they wanted to wear, regardless of the superficial medication Gael could smell under the scarf. Something was on their mind but it wasn’t his business; for all the help he could try to supply, it didn’t do anything if whoever he was talking to just… didn’t want to talk about it. “Uh, yeah. An… iced latte with elderflower syrup sounds nice.” Gael offered a smile after he stuttered out the first syllables of the sentence. What kind of iced latte? It didn’t really matter. Then he scoffed, looking down and tracing the scarring on his hand absently. “Sorry, that’s… a phrase I came up with with a good friend of mine. She doesn’t like ‘promise’ so we say ‘pizza with toppings’.” He glanced at them, easily picking up the wavering in their voice. “Like this: I don’t know what you’re going through, but I pizza with toppings that you’ll be okay.”

—

Maybe if they were more fashionable this would be something they could pull off without raising eyebrows. It did seem somewhat of a personal failure all of the sudden and Wynne was trying really hard not to be frustrated with themself at the moment. “O-okay, and what kind of milk would like like with that?” Reiterating that they didn’t have oat seemed rude, so they didn’t.

They had half-punched in the order, not able to finish it as the options of almond, regular, rice, soy and whatever-else still blinked at them. Wynne looked at the man as they started preparing the shot of espresso that was fundamental in near every drink, his story an anecdote that made them think he was kind. And that he had to know about fae, or at least know someone who knew about them. “And that makes sense, for you, that’s cute.” 

And there he went, promising they’d be okay because it was the simple and kind thing to do. Wynne watched the coffee machine finish its shot of espresso and then promptly burst into tears when it did. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry – I – I’ll get it done. I'm just – you're really perceptive and kind and — well, the coffee, I'll get it done.” The tears kept flowing, and their shoulders shook as the smell of fresh coffee filled the air.

—

While he was anticipating some form of emotional release - indeed, they had it practically written all over their face - he wasn’t expecting them to abruptly start crying. “Ah, there we go.” Gael breathed deeply, inhaling the scent of the espresso and he motioned for the barista to at least go off to the side of the counter, casting a quick glance over his shoulder to make sure that there wasn’t anyone immediately behind him. Fortunately there wasn’t. “Don’t worry about the coffee.” He said gently, softening his voice and reaching into his messenger bag that hung comfortably around his shoulder. “Okay, how can I help?” He asked, pulling out a travel pack of tissues and placing them on the counter for them. “What’s your name?” Gael asked, keeping himself from thinking too far ahead - he didn’t want to get up on a pedestal and start preaching, not to this poor worker who obviously had something pressing on their mind. Instead, he focused on them entirely, almost giving the impression that the rest of the coffee shop didn’t even exist at that moment and he was ready to snipe at anyone who thought about giving them a remotely hard time.

—

It seemed like something had snapped, ever since the barn. Wynne had been struggling with emotional control since settling in Wicked’s Rest. There were bouts of what they figured to be depression, nights where they wept themself to sleep — but at work, they had usually been their contained self. But then their throat had been ripped open, and the floodgates had opened.

So they wept, shaking with it. They wept when a woman yelled at them, a week ago, because her pastry was too sweet. They wept when the machine burned their hand. They wept even harder as the customer offered kindness and gentleness. They followed his gesture, stepping away from the coffee machine, glad there were instructions of sort. They took the tissues, unfolding one of them and pressing the paper against their nose. “I’m Wynne. I’m — really sorry.” 

They looked up, all glistening eyes and increasing puffiness. They wanted the ice cubes, to press them against their wrist and eyes and become less of a red, snotty thing. “I don’t know, you’re already helping by — by not getting mad.” They let out a laugh that wasn’t humorous at all. It sounded like a sob. “And the tissues. Thank you. And I — well, it’s not your fault, okay? I just have … been very stressed.”

—

“Hi, Wynne.” Gael said softly as he adjusted himself to be placed between them and the rest of the cafe in some effort to preserve their pride. He recognized their name as well, the one who was talking about the jello from the hospital then they started talking about soup. He realized with a small pang of guilt that he never actually responded to them. “It’s nice to meet you in person.” He opted to say instead. They laughed, a wet, humorless thing that was more of an emotional burst of sorrow than anything and Gael gently reached out and placed a hand on their trembling arm for a few moments; they were warm. He heard their heartbeat in his ears though it was slightly better now that they were actually allowed to express themselves - he’d been around long enough to know that emotions were like a pressure valve, which was probably why he was always so open about his. “Don’t apologize, you’re okay.” He encouraged removing his hand and placing it back on the counter in front of them, not wanting to crowd them too much. “And yeah, I can tell!” Gael chuckled this time, not mocking but in an attempt of his own to show them that he was listening to them and empathizing with them without joining them in their despair. Sometimes, in his experience, it really helped to have some levity. “You shouldn’t be here, you should be at home healing. Eating jello or something even better. Spending time with loved ones. That sort of thing! Not here dealing with me and everyone else.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out his wallet. “If it’s money, I gotcha covered for the rest of your shift.” He offered, looking at her with his eyes - the same offer he made for Van, the same offer he’d make for anyone else.

—

The other was broad in a way that was, in this situation, not imposing but rather comforting. Wynne was able to use the other as a shield of sorts, where their tears were only reserved for them, the customer and the little corner they were in. “What’s your name?,” they wondered, realizing they hadn’t asked for it yet and trying not to chastise themself for it. “It’s nice to meet you too.” It was, in a way. Even if they were crying.

There was an arm on their shoulder, a warm and comforting touch that they didn’t respond to with a flinch or distrust. Maybe if they weren’t crying, they would have done so, but right now Wynne was craving comfort of any kind. They wanted to believe him, this kind professor who told them that they were okay but even that sheer concept of being okay seemed foreign. Like something fictional that people spoke about, just another pop culture reference they would never fully get.

He mentioned jello, so they must have spoken online. They assumed as much anyway, not wanting to overthink on that kind of thing when there was already so much else to overthink on. “I’m … fine, they say it’s good to get back to work and daily routine,” they murmured. Wynne had heard that said. But they also worked as a barista, which was probably not good for anyone’s mental health. Being with Ariadne would be better. “You …” They looked at his wallet, blinking teary-eyes at it and then looking at him. “Why would you do that? I don’t – I mean, I know you because you come in here for coffee, but we don’t really know each other.” It was about the money, though. With Zack gone, rent had gone up, and Wynne was terrified of pissing off their landlord.

—

Wynne. They might’ve had it on a name tag but Gael was never the type to read ahead and use it to someone’s advantage, even though he understood that asking something as innocuous as ‘what’s your name’ carried negative connotations nowadays. He did it because a name felt more personal coming from the mouth of whoever owned it; he liked hearing how people said their own names, even now when they said it between cries. “That’s a pretty name.” He smiled. “I’m Gael. The pleasure is mine, Wynne.” Yes, even that day, even as they had a breakdown at work because of some imperceptible weight that crashed onto their small shoulders. Speaking of work… “Yeah, they also ask if you can come into work if you tell them you’ve broken your leg.” Gael replied gently, keeping his dark eyes with their perpetual dark circles under them on them studiously. He’d also been there and done that, choosing to work even though he really wasn’t in the mood or didn’t feel like he could truly handle it. He was a workaholic but he’d been around the block enough times to know that that certainly wasn’t how most people were. “That’s how I heard it told to me before; treat a hurting mind like you would a hurting leg; both are important and need to be tended to. “And… I’m offering because I understand what it’s like.” He gave a light shrug. “I obviously don’t know whatever you’re going through specifically - everyone’s scenario is different and I don’t wanna pry - but I do understand just… wanting to go home. Knowing you need to work, stressing about the things you can’t control.” He removed a twenty and ten-dollar bill from the wallet and placed it on the counter, sliding the money towards them. “I also like to help. A stranger is just a friend you haven’t met.” He leaned back and placed a hand on his lower spine briefly as he straightened up. “That’s what I like to think, anyway.”

—

The compliment to their name was strange, if not kind. Wynne liked their name, but it was intrinsically and undeniably connected to their former life, to that person they had been supposed to be. Welsh heritage carried through in their name. “Oh, I think we talked online, maybe?” About their love for the jello, and the fact that they’d been to hospital. Suddenly the lies about their scarf seemed even less convincing, and their stomach sunk. It was one thing to have an injury, it was a whole other to have it look the way this one did. 

Their face revealed their confusion at that statement, and even as Gael went on to explain it they didn’t get it. “But you can’t stand on a broken leg, most of the time.” Sometimes you could. Wynne pushed their lips together. “I’ve always believed that it’s best to keep your head up and keep going.” People had looked to them, before, and they’d not allowed themself to look weak, scared or saddened — but clearly they lacked the strength they had had back at the commune, now. “Which is easier said than done, I guess.” They laughed humorlessly again.

He was pulling out money and they weren’t sure what to do, wanted to fold the notes up and push them back into his wallet. They didn’t want to owe people. They thought of Metzli, paying all those hospital bills, and their stomach sunk. “It’s okay, really. I’ll just … I can cope!” They added a smile to that. “And I get it, I like to help strangers too, but I’d just … feel bad if I left, we’re understaffed and it’s back to school, so my colleagues …” Wynne glanced at them, feeling bad about potentially leaving even if the thought made new tears jump to their eyes. They wanted home. Ariadne. “It’s alright.”

—

“I think we did, too.” He replied, keeping his dark eyes on them as he gauged what they were going to do with the money as they gave another empty laugh. Gael wasn’t sure if this was a case of forcing oneself through the pain out of necessity or if they took it literally, but he was reminded of Ariana and how he had to be very literal. Of course one couldn’t stand on a broken leg, but a lot of people, whether they were like Ariana or not, didn’t treat their brains like the important, tender organ that it was. He didn’t want to dwell on it, though; they weren’t here to get a lecture from him, regardless of the intent. They also didn’t want to seem to want his money, something that he found a lot more common around there; was this another case of pride? Gael wondered if maybe he was doing something wrong or if he should’ve gone about it a different way. Then again, it never seemed to be a problem before he moved to Wicked’s Rest. Reluctantly, catching their smile as well as the fresh tears that spiked the corners of their eyes in a conflict of incoming information, he tilted his head and retracted the twenty-dollar bill but kept the ten on the counter. “Well, take that one, at least. It’s a gift.” He lowered his head, glancing up at them with his best puppy dog impression he could, keeping his expression gentle. “And if you reeeeally don’t want it, then give it to someone you care about. Or spend it on someone you care about.” He paused. “Is there… anything else I can do to help, kiddo?” He asked.

—

“Well, it’s good to meet you! Sometimes people say you shouldn’t trust people online, but you seem like a real trustworthy … person,” they said, adding a smile to their statement. This was a true one, at least, contrary to them saying that they were quite alright, actually. Gael did seem like a really polite and kind man, just as he had online, and Wynne was glad for that at the very least. Even if some of that kindness was hard to accept.

They watched him leave one of the bills on the counter and hesitated a moment before taking it. “Okay. I’ll … get something nice for dinner, I think! So I can just relax when I get home. And not cook.” Or they would get Ariadne and themself a bunch of candy and eat that instead. Their appetite was still a little lopsided. “Thank you. You’re very kind.” 

What could he do to help, though? “I um, think you’ve done enough, just by being understanding.” Not everyone was. Some people just wanted their coffee and didn’t care who made it or how they felt, as long as it was done ASAP. “Maybe I can still make you your drink? I’d feel better if I at least helped you with what you wanted.” Wynne meant it, too. They didn’t want him to leave empty handed. And so they exhaled, moving back to the till. “What milk … did you want with your ….?” They paused, chuckled almost truly amusedly. “I don’t remember.”

—

Their smile, one that actually held positivity behind it, offered some relief to Gael who took that as his cue to straighten up once more. The feeling was only helped as they actually accepted the money he offered and he nodded. “Dinner, snacks. Just something to help relax.” He paused. “I’m a beef jerky fiend, myself. Sometimes with blue raspberry Air Heads. Love when they turn my tongue blue, it’s always so exciting.” He leaned back now, keeping his dark, sparkling eyes on Wynne’s diminutive frame. They looked almost doll-like and his gaze danced over their features for a moment before he smiled. “I’d love that.” Gael took a couple of side steps until he was over near the register once more and he glanced up at the menu. “Let’s see, what was it you said earlier… ah! An iced latte with elderflower syrup. Right. I remember.” He paused before giving her a slightly mischievous look. “Do you have any oat milk?” He could barely get the sentence out before his grin turned sheepish in spite of himself. “Sorry, too soon. Whole milk is fine.”

— “I think I can figure something like that out, yes,” they said, already thinking about sharing a nice snack with Ariadne while curled up. Of course, it would be their girlfriend’s presence that would relax them most of all, but a treat always helped. “I don’t know those, the Air Heads, but I will look for them. A blue tongue, that sounds like it would be funny.” Wynne wanted funny, mindless and stupid funny. Elderflower syrup, that was it. They nodded, putting the order into the till and waiting to hear what milk he wanted, only to gaze up with wide eyes at the mention of oat milk. Luckily, he was joking. “Oh!” They let out a breathy laugh, one that sounded like they were relieved. “Okay. An iced elderflower latte with whole milk.” They clicked the button for a 25% discount, then proceeded so that Gael could pay and they could start with the drink from scratch. It took a minute or two, but eventually they offered the cup to him (adorned with the name Gale, despite them having read his name online). “Thank you for stepping by. And for being a patient customer.” Wynne hoped to see a world one day filled with more people like that.

[transteez]

this bruise is yellow - An interview with the author

For our first ever author interview, we were lucky enough to ask the extremely talented @lightupfic​ a few questions about their fic, this bruise is yellow. 

“I think a basic rule of thumb is that it only counts as a ‘one-off’ if it happens once. This is, what, the third time we’ve hooked up in as many months?”

“The third and last,” San says with an overly cheery smile.

Once is an accident, twice is a mistake, and three times is a pattern. San refuses to let it become a habit.

Read the full interview below.

Q: Lightup! Thank you so much for letting us ask you some questions about your work “This Bruise Is Yellow” for trans San week! Was there a main inspiration for this work?

A: Not really, it was a short drabble that spiralled out of control, but the catalyst for that happening was my desire to explore the complicated dynamics of gender and sexuality through the lens of gender-confused San and “straight” Wooyoung.

Q: Ah yes, this is a common struggle in the community from what I’ve heard and experienced. Are you happy with the outcome? Do you think it served its purpose and you were able to explore as much as you wanted to?

A: I’m really happy with the outcome, I put so much effort into writing this fic and writing it the way I wanted to. For me, it did more than just serve its original purpose, which was me writing something I wanted to read.

I explored way more than I set out to, both in relation to Sanʼs gender and medical transition, and his relationship with Wooyoung. In particular, how they went from two people who disliked each other and were quick to lash out, to each otherʼs most trusted person.

Q: Is it still something you want to read?

A: Hopefully one day but not yet, I could probably recite it word for word with how many times I read it during redrafts and editing.

Q: Oh yeah, thatʼs valid! About Wooyoungʼs and Sanʼs relationship: is this dynamic something you like to read/write often or was it curiosity that drove you to write it?

A: I had the idea for this fic first and quickly knew I wanted the trans character to be San, but I didnʼt decide on the pairing until later. I went with San/Wooyoung because I like reading and writing them and they fit the concept really well.

Q: Did you at one point rethink the pairing?

A: I donʼt think so. There are a few bullet points of outline with them as the pairing that I wrote a few months before I started writing the fic.

Q: I see! To jump to my next question: did any of your personal experiences colour your work?

A: Yes, there are conversations that are reminiscent of ones I’ve had, thoughts and feelings that I share, and my relationship with my best friend tends to sneak into my writing without me realising.

Q: What do you want people to take away from your story? Or is there a common ground within the feedback youʼve gotten so far?

A: Broadly, an insight into a trans experience, but nothing makes me happier than a reader choosing to share with me that they found comfort in this fic or saw some of themselves in San (or Wooyoung).

Q: Do you see yourself or parts of yourself in one of your characters?

A: Sanʼs relationship with gender is very much inspired by my own.

Q: Then I hope youʼll be able to take some comfort in it as well soon! And thank you for your time!

A: Thank you for your time too! 

You can read this bruise is yellow here. 

[putthatfuckingfootdown]

Alright, apparently, I make my own posts occasionally now.

I watched Nimona with my kids, and I cried like a baby. There are many thoughts living rent-free in my head but one that really sticks with me is this:

Nimona is the ORIGINAL "monster." At no point is it stated that there have ever been other "monsters." Sure, it's possible, but as far as we are shown, she's the only one. Imagine going 1000 years, alone, and still deciding (probably not for the first time) to try to find a place you fit. And then imagine that you lose that one place of safety and comfort you thought you had. No wonder Nimona went to Gloreth's statue. As someone who tried so hard to fit in and still feels like she never found a "safe place," I cried my goddamn heart out.

Also, I love kids' media that is made well like this. Stories with a central theme that makes you ask a question. It's a monster movie, but who is the monster? At first, you think it's Ballister, having manipulated his way to the top, then killed the queen. Then I was sure it was Todd because its *always* the d-bag. It keeps going and going until you come to the actual answer. It opens up conversations with kids about who is a monster and why, how good intentions don't equal morality, and how to figure out who to trust.

I love that it handles adult themes such as mental health, prejudice, and suicidal ideation. It points out that being different and being yourself are things people will try to change, but its important to stick to who you are. I've seen posts talking about Nimona being trans/ADHD coded and more, and I can see it. I love that so many people and so many kids are gonna be able to recognise themselves in her and hopefully open up if they are struggling.

If you haven't seen it yet, what are you waiting for. Best movie I've watched so far this year, honestly, and I'm gonna watch it a thousand times more.

[seek--rest]

Hey!! very interested to know more about the specifics of a collaboration writing. How do you do it? Do you take turns in writing, do you have a shared doc, do you call each other and write a chapter together? Thanks for your time and hard work on these fics ❤️

I would LOVE to talk about this, I love shop talk it's the best!

Every collaboration is different because every person is different but what I've found to really work is that you have an idea, or maybe you're talking about an idea, or maybe someone else is talking about an idea. You think it's great. You want to see it exist beyond just screaming about in a discord and then never going anywhere.

I'll usually continue the conversation, maybe see how interested someone is in writing something and if they want to do it themselves, I'm the happiest little clam. However, if someone wants to do it but also wants some assist, I offer to co-write it with them. That's also happened to me, in the same way!

After you figured out that yes we both want to write this, then you work to figure out the how. Not assignments just yet, but figuring out the world. The details. Who is involved. Why are they involved. What are they doing there. What led them to make the choices they did. If it's a friends to lovers Peter and MJ fic that's great but like, who are they in this world? What's the canon like? What's their family look like? What are we using and disregarding? Who are we making their friends and their family?

Some of the stuff (like their choice of major in college if they're adults) may not seem significant but it helps build the world AND all those little details add up (who they're living with influences who they're going to interact with, how the plot unfolds, how things can be changed or shifted, etc.).

Once that's clearer, then I like to always work with some kind of outline. It doesn't have to be nailed down to the letter but I need some structure to know what's going on and imo, it helps to keep things clear for the collaborator too. Because after you've done that (usually in a scene by scene breakdown), then you can decide who is writing what.

It's varied anything from people writing wholesale chapters, alternating scenes, picking which scenes mean most to them- it can all change based on the preference.

One thing that I believe strongly about when it comes to collaborating is that you cannot have an ego. This isn't your fic, this is our fic and if someone wants to be more of an editor, sees different gaps in your sections or doesn't agree with the direction or the tone, a good collaboration makes it so that you are able to work on that. No one person is leading the charge, you actively work together so that hopefully the finished product doesn't read like two people cobbling together distinct styles and tones, but one cohesive piece. Idk if anyone notices, but I absolutely work to fit the tone, meter, and style of whoever I'm working with so that it matches.

It's written ad-hoc mostly, whenever the other person has the time via a doc and letting the other person know when it's their "turn" via discord DMs mostly lmao. It always helps to have a backlog before posting imo but then, I've also absolutely written fics week to week with people. The more you collaborate too, the easier it gets to go back and forth AND the easier it gets to anticipate what the other person is thinking and how to blend together.

tl;dr I LOVE collabs. It's half the work for double the fun and one of my favorite parts of being in fandom!!

[our-arospec-experience]

Hi! I'm glad there's a blog for aro-spec identities :)

(CW: Vague mention of some sexual things and like potential romantic feelings)

I'm kind of in a little bit of a pickle- I used to think I was like 100% aromantic. Like, I'd never really had a crush, I did the thing a lot of aros did where they forced themselves to have crushes, I was even repulsed by the idea of a romantic relationship half the time. I was sure I was aro. I also flirt with people quite a lot and it really got intense when a serious relationship I was in (qpr) ended. Everybody I flirted with knew it was kind of a joke and I wasn't interested in a relationship. But there was this one guy who felt kind of different, we'll call him A. I started getting really flirty with him, at first as a joke as I usually do. But he was actually responding to this with genuine feelings and reactions. I continued like this with him (doing some kind of sexual things with him) because he liked it and I liked being wanted. Slowly, however, I stopped flirting with other people. It was exclusively him and I, and I started to actually feel sexual attraction to him (I'm also on the ace-spec, just incredibly sex-favoring so this was surprising to me). I started trying to get into the stuff he was interested in, like his favorite shows and musicals and all that. I tried to always be there for A and make him feel like he was safe and could be himself around me. I was like... "Why do I want to do this? Why do I care so much?" Then, we established ourselves as friends with benefits and would continue to do what we were doing before. But I've been getting really close with him, and I think I'm developing romantic feelings for him. This is hitting me like a train. Oh my god, I am so confused. I have never felt this way for a person, ever. I was 100% positive I was aro and I had finally become at peace with it, and then this motherfucker comes along.

I don't know if I'll feel like this for more people in the future, or if this is just the one time. Should I take down my aromantic pride flag? Can I still use the label? Like I'm so comfortable with it and then A comes along with his cute smile and his pretty voice and idk what to do.

Sorry this was so long and probably not the right thing for your blog- Thanks again for having this blog, I love reading the asks submitted here.

-- 💅(in case I write here again)

that does sound tough. Perhaps you could be demiromantic?

Demiromantic: an individual who does not experience romantic attraction until after a close emotional bond has been formed.

keep in mind, only you can decide what label fits best for you, so if you still feel like aromantic fits, then use it!

hopefully you feel happy with yourself no matter what you decide in the end :)

[silver-wield]

jfc. That's really all what I feel about that cosmo canyon scene on twitter. We have idiots claiming that yamazaki can't speak for cloud? Like dude, I wrote scripts for at least 7 years of my life, if the actor doesn't at least know shit about his character, then goddamn the production failed. Of course he can speak for his character, like how any literal actor on Hollywood does, never heard of ad libs or no script scenes? How do you think they're able to do that? Anyway they even end up bringing up the dress scene of aerith. I don't get how they can even think that that Cloud's reaction to that is considered cute. He say "it doesn't matter what you wear anyway" NOT to comfort her but to dismiss that it doesn't matter what her get up is, in context since they just need a stand in to fill up requirements for corneo's thing. In short he gives no shit. I bet they'd even take it as a compliment if cloud says "corneo would approve of your choice". I dunno man, I think if they are capable of thinking that his reaction to the mid and worse dress is favorable then I just know they have a thing for being humiliated and insulted. For the record worse= kinda disgusted ngl, mid= curious innocent like a kid he even has the confused head tilt, best= he doesn't even recognize her smh and the eng ver just send off their delusions, meanwhile the jp ver was more understandable. I mean heck, if she needs a million make over then how is that a compliment!? For every dress she had she really needed to pay just to look pretty!? That's an insult and as a hopeless romantic it's awful! Cloud is capable of complimenting, she's just not his type, he's just not into her at all orz.

Tbh I really don't get why they are those who really want to reel it in that the whole game is ambiguous. Ambiguous and subtle are not the same. The drink scene is subtle because that fits cloud but in reality it's very much obvious. People are gaslighting themselves to think the writers like to give the fans liberty, meanwhile they literally just said again and again that it'll be less room for interpretation. I feel like I'm going stupid. How is this so hard to understand. Anybody who thinks they know how the writer's intention just to suit your taste, reflect again and again. Man.. how does anyone keep sane in this fandom.

It's okay cause now they've decided after 4yrs that it doesn't matter either way, so hopefully this means they'll shut the fuck up about it and we can enjoy our content without them sticking their fat ugly faces in the middle of everything.

Also pretty funny how this dumbass acts like they played but messed up the order of events in the scene, didn't understand the context of the scene and then tries to claim it's jenova driving Cloud to be nice to Tifa anyway.

Literally every excuse they could think of to make it seem like Cloud dgaf about Tifa when everyone involved and all the accompanying sources say he's stupid for her.

They should really just stfu and gtfo.

[ash-and-books]

Rating: 4.5/5

Book Blurb: A charming opposites-attract romance, Love, Naturally by Sophie Sullivan is for anyone who ever stepped outside their comfort zone and found that all the best things can happen when you take a chance.

Presley Ayers is not the woman you bring on a camping trip. An accomplished concierge at an exclusive hotel in Great Falls, MI, she knows more about the top ten places for champagne and caviar than she does about the best hiking boots to go stomping around near Lake Michigan. But when she surprises her boyfriend of eight months with a vacation to the Get Lost Lodge and he dumps her instead, Presley decides to rough it solo and take the trip herself.

When Beckett Keller helps the gorgeous woman off the rickety boat and onto Lodge territory, it’s clear to him she's made a mistake. She doesn’t like hiking, fishing, or nature in general, so why did she go on this trip? He’s got other things on his mind though—a crumbling lodge, and his own plans and dreams that are forever deferred—so he doesn’t have time for Ms. Fish-Out-of-Water. Even so, neither Beckett nor Presley can help that inexplicable draw they feel towards each other. He’s all rough stubble and plaid shirts, while she’s all high heels and brand-name athleisurewear.

But you know what they say about opposites.

Review:

Deciding to go on her ex's dream vacation after a terrible breakup, Presley Ayers finds herself falling in love with the cozy Get Lost Lodge, the community, and a reserved but very sweet guy. Presley thought she'd surprise her boyfriend with his dream vacation, as a way to reconnect despite their relationship being a bit rocky only for him to tell her she is too demanding and he didn't want to go with her. Presley gets dumped by him and decides that she's had enough of trying to constantly please others and that she would take the vacation for herself and try and step out of her comfort zone on the trip. Presley is going to be staying at the Get Lost Lodge and hopefully, trying out new things and relaxing. Cue, Beckett Keller, a reserved and off the grid guy who's family owns the Get Lost Lodge. Beckett has sworn never to fall for any of the guests who stay at the lodge and that he'd focus on helping his family maintain their lodge. Yet when some booking issues occur, Presley and Beckett find themselves sharing a cabin and spending more time with each other. Despite their clear differences, they are drawn to each other and the chemistry between them is growing. Yet, Presley is only staying for a week and this fling was only suppose to last a week and end right...? Or is this actually the real thing and all the fake dating between them is actually something very real. This was such a cute and cozy romance. It definitely felt like a cute getaway and all the fun and sweet romance vibes of Hallmark movie (a good one). I loved how Presley and Beckett fit together and they really were so good for one another. They had great chemistry and the background characters were fantastic. I adored meeting Beck's family and the fun Lodge community. This really is such a cute feel good sweet romance that I definitely think would be a easy read for people!

*Thanks Netgalley and St. Martin's Press, St. Martin's Griffin for sending me an arc in exchange foe an honest review*

[psychedelicwaves]

Prompt: @byerslvr : ohhhh, I would love to read some protective mike. that despite el being there, he just catches will trying to fall asleep in the van and hugs him so he can fall asleep resting on his lap. that'd be so cuteeee

I love this idea so much, hopefully this lives up to what you imagined!! x

-

Between the mayhem of El being taken and the four of them travelling across the country for days on end, it was no surprise to Mike when he found Will trying, and failing, to sleep in the back of the van.

It had been a long day, they were so close to reaching El, yet so exhausted that neither Argyle, nor Jonathan were in any fit state to drive. Unfortunately for them, this realisation had come as they found themselves deep into the Nevada desert, with no rest-stops for miles.

Jonathan and Argyle had camped up in the front, judging by the smell, they’d manage to smoke themselves into a nice little dream-state. This left Mike and Will the rest of the van, however it wasn’t exactly in a great state.

His best friend looked uncomfortable, surrounded by discarded pizza boxes, debris and a few gross bloody tissues; from the agent that had passed. Grimacing at the sight and feeling a little tired himself, Mike decided to make the space a little tidier, shifting the boxes and other trash onto the seats at the front. Once he felt it was sufficiently clean, he pulled out the blankets that they’d used as neck pillows throughout their travels, placing one over Will’s half-asleep form and laying down underneath the other.

There was a slight space between the two of them, although due to the fact they were in a van, there really wasn’t much room to move around. As Will eventually fell asleep, he turned over, his face just inches away from Mike’s, the taller boy held his breath subconsciously, he couldn’t tear his eyes from the pale pink, slightly parted lips in front of him.

Quite quickly, Mike sat himself up, trying to give Will some more space, and not think about how inviting his lips had been. He looked down to the sleeping boy, who was now more or less right next to him, the side of his body pressed against Mike. He thought there was still something off, even though he was resting, Will didn’t look comfortable, the rough surface of the van floor provided little support.

There was one solution that immediately popped into his mind, something he wished to do a great deal, something that he thought about numerous times whilst away from his friend.

Mike slid himself down a little, so he could place an arm underneath Will, his head buzzing as he did so, the boy wriggled slightly but did not wake; somewhat to his relief. He used his other arm to gently position Will’s upper body so that he was resting in his lap, head against his chest. At this point Will had certainly returned to consciousness, though he did move or protest, just allowed himself to settle into the warm, comfortable embrace.

“Sleep well, Will.” Mike whispered, looking down at the brown mop of hair, much shorter than it used to be, he wanted to run his hands through it, but holding Will was far better anyway.

Seeing one of the people he loved the most looking so comfortable made Mike feel undeniably warm inside, especially after the few days they’d had, and the further horrors that would likely follow. Just this moment of brief happiness, knowing that he could at least provide Will with some support and kindness, that was what would keep him going.

The warmth from Will’s sleeping form was beginning to seep over to Mike, he found that his eyelids were becoming heavier by the second.

Soon they were both fast asleep, in a brief but memorable break from their current brush with death, the van was quiet, all parties finally getting some well earned rest.

Who knew what tomorrow would bring, after all?

[glassartpeasants]

was trying to figure out what idea i liked better, Isaac with a size kink or where he loves to worship you and focus on your pleasure.

and then i considered both

Isaac who lets you use him like a toy, sitting you on his lap and letting you ride him to your hearts content. loving how big his cock looks with your small frame wrapped around it, feeling his bulge from the lightest touch to your tummy. watching as you fuck yourself on his cock just how you want, taking it as slow or as fast as you need and praising the stretch he gives you, whining about how big and thick he is, telling him he “barely fits”, suggesting he might “break you”, and feeling him throb inside of you at your words.

Great minds think alike

Title: One Of The Same

Isaac Grossman x F!Reader

Warnings: smut, slight breeding kink, mentions of using a knife, both are crazy for one another, mentions of murder, small belly buldge, size kink???,

~~~

It’s not weird to watch someone from afar! You're just simply observing them, learning their patterns and behavior. Plus, if you want someone to like you back, wouldn’t the best thing to do is know what they like, right?

That’s what you told yourself.

He was so hard to approach. Trying to talk to him felt like you were choking on air. Every time you got close to him, you would freeze up and completely forget whatever you would say to him. He always just had a way of leaving you speechless! 

You didn’t care about what everyone else would say. You guys were meant to be with each other! You could see how he looked at you; hopefully, he saw how you were looking at him! How could you not fall in love with the man? He seems so confident, and you can’t get over how determined he is! Watching him felt like you were getting access to a movie that hadn’t been released yet!

You would do anything for him! Your love knew no bounds! Soon enough, he’d see that you both were meant for each other! It was fate.

And fate is what made you lie to your parents.

How could you tell them that you want a peasant as your groom? Even if he wanted to, he wouldn’t be able to achieve the social status your parents had. But that didn’t matter to you. You knew he was put on this earth for a reason: to be with you forever and never separate no matter what. 

Just imagining wearing all white and walking down an aisle never failed to get you caught up in the dream life you had created with him.

~~~

People are so inconsiderate. They were taking all your time for themselves. He didn’t need to see all the pathetic nobodies you accompanied yourself with. You were just so perfect. He couldn’t have even thought about a life without you. 

It was so easy to watch you and what you did when your alone. Your parents' pathetic guards around your house were so easy to dispose of. Nothing would get in the way of him knowing that you were safe sleeping in your room. 

You go to bed at precisely 10:00 pm. So he leaves his home every night and watches you get ready for bed. Your just so pretty when your sleeping. He just can’t help it! He’s thought about opening the window before and crawling into bed next to you but knowing that when you both get married, he’d have all the time in the world. 

Oh, just imagine sleeping in his bed with you next to him. Looking at him with adoring eyes as you smiled at him. If he closed his eyes hard enough, he could even imagine you begging him to take you away.

Oh, all the things he could do with you. Listening to you whine and moan under him as he fucks you to the point you can’t even form a sentence. Knowing that you would lay there and his name would be the only thing you can think of. Or even you being on top of him while he watches you fuck yourself using his cock. So many possibilities that’ll come true soon. He’s not sure how much longer he can watch you and not give in to his urge to whisk you away.

~~~

Your parents decided that tomorrow was a great day to throw a masquerade party for all the wealthy people of London. Most likely to find someone to marry you off to. But you rather watch him instead of seeing all these power-hungry families wanting to combine families. 

You simply stood by the window facing his house to avoid everyone. You were perfectly fine right where you were. It was all calm until you felt someone tap your shoulder lightly. You turned around to see someone with a mask you hadn’t seen yet. 

“Hello, Miss (Y/N), I saw you from across the room and just knew I had to make an introduction.” You look to see a man much taller than you. Almost the same height as your true love. Now that you're looking at him, he looks eerily similar to him. While looking at him, you see your father giving you a glare that could kill thousands, letting you know that you had to talk to him even if you didn’t want to. You let out a sigh of defeat before giving the man your full attention.

“Well, who do I owe the pleasure of meeting?” The man grabs your hand and kisses your knuckles.

“Surprising as it may be, I wish to keep it secret. Cause by the end of the night, I’ll manage to make you fall in love with me without knowing my name. And when that time comes, then you’ll know my name.” You would be lying if you said you weren’t intrigued. While, of course, you would never fall in love with someone else. The idea of figuring out this mysterious man’s name gave an exciting twist to your everyday boring life.

“Okay then, Mr. Secret. What do you wish to do?”

“How about we dance? I’d love to see you dance your heart away.” You let him grab your hand and take you dancing. 

Being so close to him, you realize how his eyes look exactly like your love. Almost everything about him matches. All the way down to the specific length of his hair. Did he have a twin brother that was separated at birth? Cause there was no way to explain what you were seeing right now. It was just impossible.

Getting into this party put up more challenges than he initially thought. First, he had to get rid of one of those ungrateful twats. They would never appreciate you as he would. All they care about is your family's money. The last thing was getting past the guards, who seemingly knew everyone who was coming. He managed to convince them by bribing them. Some guards they were by letting anyone into the party.

But now that he was here and dancing with you, it made it all worth it. Watching you dance with him and feeling your soft skin in his own hands made his imagination run wild. Was every part of your body as smooth as your hands were? Of course, they were! What’s he talking about? 

Oh, how he wanted to take you away from this place. Move you into his own home and watch as you would look at him with loving eyes. Just imagining the look on your face when he fucks you so deep that you would surely carry his kid. You would be so happy when he knocks you up that you’d beg for more.

Hell, he could even take you tonight! He knows just by the look in your eyes that you want it too. If only he could figure out a way to get you away from all the eyes that laid on you at this moment. With everyone watching, there was no way he’d be able to take you without getting caught. There had to be something…

He wasn’t paying attention. Maybe you could slip his mask off and see who he was? That or ask him questions that only your love would know. You decided to ask first and then take off his mask if necessary. 

“Since you won’t tell me your name, may I ask questions about you then?”

“I suppose it wouldn’t hurt, ask away, my dear.”

“Were you born in London?” 

“I have lived in London all my life. Sometimes I want to leave and see the world, but something will always hold me back.”

“May I ask what that something is?” You could hear him chuckle as he leaned down and whispered in your ear.

“Don’t worry. You’ll be the first to know.” You could feel his hot breath against your neck. Such an odd answer, honestly. 

“Well then, how about your favorite hobby?”

“Well, the answer that it should be, is not appropriate for the world to hear.” Your face burned at the thought of what he could possibly mean. The smirk on his face didn’t help your suspicions. 

Oh, how he wished you could see your cute face. He’s okay with letting you think those naughty thoughts of yours. His actual hobby is much more sick and twisted, and he wouldn’t have it any other way. But he didn’t want to scare his pretty little wife off.

Looking around the room, he noticed that near the food section, there was a hallway that he could easily slip through with you. All he had to do was get you to follow him there. 

“You looked thirsty, my dear. How about we go grab some drinks?” 

“I am quite parched, so that sounds delightful.” He grabs your hand and walks you over to the drinks. 

While there, he plans on how to sneak you out without your parents throwing a fit. The hallway was a great way, but despite watching you so many times, he still didn’t know the in’s and out’s of your home.

But you did.

“Do you like looking at the stars?” His question caught you off guard. Technically you did cause of the times you stayed awake to look at your love's home; It would always be a beautiful starry night.

“Yes. the stars are always so pretty.”

“I know of a great place to look at them if you let me take you there.” You were fighting with yourself when hearing his proposal. While you wanted to get away from this annoying party, he was a stranger to you. If he tried anything, what would you do? But if you didn’t go, your parents would likely marry you to a much older man. Maybe you could run away after he took you to see the stars to your love's house. He would always take you in!

“Okay. I suppose it wouldn’t hurt.”

“Well, lead the way outside, my dear. I promise you’ll love it.”

~~~

It was colder outside than you initially thought it was. The cold air nipped at your cheeks as you followed the masked man. When you were following him, you noticed that he was heading the way to your love's house. If he tried anything, it would be much easier to run away!

When he took you to the destination, it was beautiful. The sky was clear, and you could see every star in the sky. It gave a calm feeling that let you’ve never felt before. 

“Beautiful, isn’t it? I go here when I need to get away. It always gave me peace.”

“It really is.” You let out a sigh as you sit down on the grass. You could hear him coming up behind you before seeing him sit beside you.

“Hey, may I ask you another question?”

“Of course.”

“Do you have any siblings? Specifically, a twin? You look so similar to a man that I know.”

“No. I’m an only child. Who is this man you speak of?” Annoyed couldn’t even describe how Isaac was feeling. Who could look exactly like him that she would know of? He can’t let that man roam this earth knowing he looks similar. 

“He’s a lower-class citizen. He works at a construction company like you. His name is Isaac Lee Grossman. He lives just at the end of town alone. I can see his house from my bedroom window.” You knew who he was? You knew he existed without him having to do anything? How? He’s only seen you on the town a few times, and that’s how he met you! You were walking with your parent's guards and going to the market. You turned and smiled at him; that was the day you sealed your fate and destined yourself to be his forever.

“How do you know him?”

“I originally met him when he first moved back to his house. He didn’t see me, but I saw him. He was such a strange man. He was never talking to anyone. Only going to work and back home. Despite that, there was always something alluring about him. I finally managed to catch his eye at the market one day. He looked at me, and I sent him a smile. I desperately wanted to talk to him, but with my parent's guards around me, I couldn’t. That and I was speechless every time I saw him.”

“I asked people for his name, and I was enamored when I finally learned it. I did the best I could to see him on any occasion. We saw each other, but I never said anything. I fell in love without even saying a word to him. But my parents would never allow it. My parents would rather send me away than marry me off to a man who wasn’t of my class.” 

A sick smile made its way to Isaac’s face. Of course! Why didn’t he take you sooner! He knew you loved him back! Now, he’s got you all alone.

“Well, it looks like I win.”

“What?”

“Earlier tonight, I said that if I got you to fall in love with me by the end of tonight, I would tell you my name.” He laughed as he took off his mask and smiled at you with a crazed look in his eye.

“It looks like you already know it.” 

You couldn’t help the shock that filled your body. How did he get past the guards! And how could you have not seen it sooner! It was so easy to see! You just poured your heart out to him about how much you loved him without even talking to him! God, you were so embarrassed! What would he think of you now that he knows you watched him?!

You were pulled from your thoughts when you felt him grab your chin lightly. 

“Well, I’m glad you feel the same. I was beginning to think I was crazy.” You couldn’t believe what you were hearing! He felt the same! You couldn’t help the happiness that filled your entire being as you jumped onto him. He ended up falling to the ground as you laid on top of him. 

Grabbing his face, you placed a kiss on his lips.  Finally, after so long, you could feel his lips against yours. All your dreams of him came true as you felt him kiss you back. 

His hands ran along your back as he kissed you with the same amount of passion you were kissing him with. Being outside for anyone to see gave you a sort of unnamed excitement.  Knowing the risk that you could be caught only made you want to continue it more. 

You run your hands along his covered chest as he reaches into his back pocket.  You look to see what it is before seeing the metal shape of a knife. Before you could say anything, you felt him cut your dress before ripping it. The cold air blew against your body, causing you to shiver and move closer to him for warmth. All you were left with was your undergarments, but that was soon ripped as well when you heard him laugh into your ear before kissing your neck. 

“So pretty and all mine.” his words made your toes curl in excitement. Imagine all the things you could do now that you were both alone. 

You moved your hands towards his suit before you tried to unbutton his pants. You felt his hands grab yours and help you before you snaked your hand down his pants and grabbed his cock. He gasped at feeling your cold fingers wrap around his cock. You leaned down to kiss his neck while slowly moving your hand up and down.

You wanted to show him that he made the right choice by falling in love with you. And you would do whatever it takes to make that happen.

He felt so huge in your hand. Would he even fit? You could only imagine how it would feel inside you. The thought simply made you rub your thighs in anticipation.  You felt his hand grab your wrist and yank it out of his pants before whispering in your ear with lust dripping in his voice.

“Enough with the foreplay. I wanna see you fuck yourself on my cock.” Your face burned at how straightforward he was. You gulped before pulling down his pants enough for his cock to leave the confinements of his pants. You straddled him before slowly lowering yourself on his cock. 

You were only halfway, and it already felt like he was stretching you open. You felt so full already that you had to take a second. Before you could, you felt Isaac put his hands on your hips before slamming you down on his cock. You let out a cry as your legs shook. You swear you could feel him in your womb. 

“Go on, darling, I know you can do it.” You slowly lifted yourself up with shaky legs before slamming back down on him again. Every downward motion felt as if he was taking your breath away. You felt him place a hand on your tummy before thrusting upward, making you cry out of surprise. 

“Aw, it looks like I'm too big for you. I can even feel my cock pounding away inside you.” Your hips had picked up speed by now, and you desperately tried to look away from his lustful eyes. Him just watching you use his cock as your personal toy made your face burn. 

Every thrust down felt as if he was stretching you more and more. You could feel him hitting your cervix every time. 

“You're too big! I feel like your gonna break me!” You cried out as you started going faster. It felt so amazing despite him stretching you past your limits. With every word of praise you sent his way, you could feel him throb inside you. 

The feeling of his hands on your waist caused you to stop your thrusts as you looked at him. Why would he stop you? Before you could say anything, you felt him slam your hips down. You couldn’t even make noises other than moans and whines as he pounded away inside you. 

Oh, how cute you looked. That look in your eyes as you felt him pounding your insides.  He just couldn’t take it anymore. He wanted to see you come undone on his cock. The thought of filling you up with his cum made him throb inside you. Seeing you bite your lip to keep yourself from moaning only made him pound into you even harder.  He wanted to hear you scream his name and beg him to make you cum.

“P-please! I can’t! Your too big!” You cry as you try to meet his thrust despite your pleas. You were so close to cumming around his cock that you lost all sense. You started to try and go faster to chase that high that was creeping up so closely. After so many restless nights and fantasies, your dreams were about to come true!

Isaac could feel yourself clench around his cock, which only made him want to see you cum on his cock even more. You cried out his name as he felt you cum on his cock. He smirked before rolling you both over so that you were the one on the ground now. 

He grabbed your thighs and lifted them up to your chest before pounding his way inside you again. He could feel himself getting deeper with each thrust. He can just imagine how you’ll look when he fills your womb with his cum. Watching it spill out of you. 

His thoughts only drove him more wild when he heard you trying to speak, but no words could come out. 

“You have something to say, darling? Come on, spit it out.” You only babbled as no words would form in your head. The only thing on your mind was the cock that was ramming itself inside of you. You could feel him twitch inside you before one final hard thrust that had him pressed snug against your womb as ropes of cum flooded inside you. Deep breaths filled the air as you tried to regain your thoughts. You thought it was all finished before you heard him laugh above you and his hips starting to piston themselves inside you again. 

“I-I feel so full I can’t!” You cried out to him as the familiar feeling started back up again.

“Don’t worry, love. We only have a few more rounds to go. Your so pretty taking my cock and cum like this. Can’t wait to fuck you like this every night.”His words didn’t register in your mind as you were too busy thinking about how much longer he wanted to go. You didn’t know how much longer you could take this abuse on your insides.

You looked so perfect under him like this. Seeing your cute face and knowing that by the time he’s done with you, you won’t even be able to walk on your own without tripping or his seed spilling out of you. And he knows you would be able to take it all like a good girl. 

He just can’t wait to knock you up. That way, you’ll never have to leave the house, and he could be the only one to see you. You would never have to go anywhere cause he would take care of you. He could fuck you stupid every night and watch you give raise his kids.

Oh, how he couldn’t wait.

[celebratingchenrich]

Chenrich Week Prompts!

Hello again all! I wanted to make a specific post for the Chenrich Week prompts to hopefully help inspire any and all creators! Again, you can refer to the list more easily at any time by clicking through the link I have on the blog’s sidebar if you wish! But for some more in-depth details, please read on!

And again, all of the below ideas are just suggestions to get the ideas flowing! As long as you come up with something you think fits the prompt for the day, you are more than welcome to share whatever you come up with!

CHENRICH WEEK (September 10-17)

DAY 1 (Saturday): GABE LIVES AU Obviously, without Gabe’s death, there wouldn’t have been a plot at all, but that doesn’t matter with fan works! Whatever you wish could have been given more focus while Gabe was alive, now is your chance to explore! Whether it’s seeing more of “Protective Big Brother” Gabe giving Steph the third degree, whether Gabe would’ve been a little shit and teasing the hell out of both Alex and Steph for their crush, or whether it’s a flash-forward to the future where he’s Alex’s best man at their wedding, or cat-sitting at Steph and Alex’s apartment that definitely shouldn’t have that many cats, the possibilities for an alternate universe where Gabe lives are endless!

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DAY 2 (Sunday): SECOND KISS

Steph and Alex’s first kiss was absolutely wonderful and earth-shattering of course, but what about their second kiss? After Alex suffered several awful bodily injuries, after Steph went through a period of anxiety and self-doubt and worry, after Jed confessed to be a liar in front of everyone, when and how do Alex and Steph approach the idea of “who they are to each other”? Is their second kiss soft, full of relief? Is it a passionate promise of tomorrow?

Or, perhaps, if you want to deviate away from canon, is there an AU where a second kiss occurs? Perhaps they drunkenly met at a bar one night and ended up making out and the next morning one of them finds themselves over at the other’s house. Or there’s elements of mysticism and the supernatural involved where one of them remembers every life, but for the other, each rebirth or reincarnation is like kissing for the first time.

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DAY 3 (Monday): AUTUMN/FALL

Autumn means Halloween, Thanksgiving... maybe even preparing for Christmas already! Maybe Steph learns that Alex never really had any good “traditional holiday” experiences in her childhood and decides to pull out all the stops. Is it a comedy of errors where Steph tries a little too hard and it all falls apart? Or maybe they have a nice quiet evening to themselves and enjoy each other’s company!

Fall could also mean Steph’s trauma around the fall of Arcadia Bay rearing its ugly head once again. How would they process that together as a couple?

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DAY 4 (Tuesday): FOUND FAMILY

There’s a lot of warm and friendly people within the town of Haven. If Alex stuck around with Steph, what does it look like for her to settle into life with the people around her? How quickly does everything start to feel like home?

And if Alex and Steph decided to leave, to tour around the world, what would that look like? Who would they meet on the road, how would Alex feel around Steph’s old band contacts? Would Alex feel out of depth in “Steph’s world”, or would they grow together as they travel?

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Day 5 (Wednesday): CONCERT/JAM SESSION

There’s a few texts in the game between Steph and Alex that imply that they totally had one-on-one jam sessions together at the record shop. And obviously there’s no way their performance at the Spring Festival was a fluke, so they’ve obviously rehearsed together! What would their jam sessions look like in a familiar space where they’re alone together?

Or, perhaps, how does their first performance on the road go? Are they in a small dive bar where no one pays them any attention? Do Steph’s old contacts hook them up with a bigger venue right off the bat? Do they brainstorm band names beforehand or completely forget about that tiny little detail until Alex is standing at the mic for the first time?

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Day 6 (Thursday): CAMPING

Camping can be super romantic and serene. If you’re prepared, that is! Maybe Steph wants to take Alex out for a lovely experience in nature, just the two of them, and she forgets to bring something crucially important. Maybe Alex is just as confused as she is, or maybe she’s a secret wilderness buff because one of her foster families put her in the girl scouts.

Do they get horribly lost while hiking because somebody can’t read a map? Or maybe their idea to rent a canoe wasn’t exactly the smartest one because neither of them really know how to paddle, exactly. They don’t know why they keep spinning in circles, they really don’t.

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Day 7 (Friday): PROPOSAL

Who ends up getting down on one knee? Do they plan a surprise proposal, or is it something that is just so natural that there’s no fanfare, almost as if it is an inevitable conclusion? Do they get friends involved with the occasion? Are they one of those “we both somehow decided to propose to each other on the exact same day” sort of couples? What makes them decide to propose in the first place?

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BONUS Day 8 (Saturday): ACTOR APPRECIATION DAY

The final bonus/optional day is a day to appreciate the full performance artists (mocap for face&body as well as voice acting!) for Alex Chen and Steph Gingrich - Erika Mori and Katy Bentz!

Maybe it’s just making a post talking about your favourite moment in True Colours (or in Wavelengths as well as LIS: Before The Storm for Steph!) that you felt was performed really well. Something that just really grabbed at your heartstrings and pulled you into the world and made you experience it fully.

Since Erika and Katy are both on Twitter, this would be a wonderful chance for everyone around the same time to flood their mentions with appreciation, positive comments and so so much love. They worked really hard, and what better way to show them that their performances still impact so many of us, even one year after the release of the game.

Katy Bentz is also a streamer on Twitch! If she’s streaming on Saturday, why not stop by and spread some love there! I personally frequent her streams fairly often, and she really does appreciate every message she gets from people who say how much her performance of Steph means to them. She doesn’t stream too often on Saturdays, so maybe get a headstart on this one and pop in on a Friday instead ;P

[foxskip]

I'm interested in the wrestlers

OH BOY :D

I have a *few* more but for now I'll just do Best Friends/Gentleman's Club.

Additionally, my thoughts/analysis are largely derived from the Homestuck text/wiki, the Hiveswap Extended Zodiac aspect descriptions, and the Class analysis/decriptions found here.

Chuck Taylor = Knight of Blood

Yes I am giving Chuck Karkat's classpect, but when you think about it, Chuck iiiis kind of a Karkat, even though he doesn't have mutant blood. Regarding the Blood part, Chuck is often defined by his bonds to other wrestlers, whether F.I.S.T., The Gentleman's Club, or Best Friends. Being very ambitious, he often places himself as the leader of his groups or at the very least defines himself as "The Brains" (also being the one basically in charge of mentoring Yuta), but whether he's actually that successful at said role is a bit debatable. Regardless, he is often a driving force in the lives of his friends whether or not he's making wise choices. And as a Knight he both uses these bonds to move forward and feels a great need to help out his friends, even to his detriment (see: WTL 2018 "I just wanted your mom to be proud of us" and agreeing to a stipulation where he would be forced into servitude to Miro in justice of Trent). Wow I wonder what other character who also lashes out at people and is deeply insecure ALSO obsesses over being able to help his friends

Trent? Beretta = Heir of Heart

I would say Greg is someone who wears his heart on his sleeve. He is very straightforward and doesn't care for overdramatic bullshit when he's going into or preparing for a match, he's just going to do what he does and hopefully do good at it, like Heirs are kinda known to. He's said before he prefers singles matches, which goes with the individualistic nature the Extended Zodiac describes for Heart, but his emotional closeness to his friends often makes him much more of team player. Speaking of, although he doesn't care abt other people's dramatic bullshit, he's very protective of his friends (& mom) and is keyed into their emotional wellbeing even if he doesn't entirely understand a situation (standing with Chuck in WTL, or standing up for Chuck & OC when Yuta decided to leave). Sue being such a big part of him also definitely fits the motif of being an Heir of Heart.

Orange Cassidy = Bard(??) of Breath

I feel like the Breath aspect is obvious enough. In fact, I think the Extended Zodiac description for Breath can be applied to him pretty well: "Flexible and driven, they leave an impact wherever they go. ... They have a tendency to underestimate themselves, and not always out of poor self-esteem. They were just doing their own thing." OC is very much a go with the flow guy, while also using his quickness and his opponents' reactions toward him to his advantage. I'm hesitant to give him Bard as a class (maybe in part b/c I don't see him wearing a cod piece but I suppose god tier outfits are customizable anyway) but the passive way he allows his disposition to fuck w/ opponents does kinda fit.

Kris Statlander = Witch of Space

Another canon classpect assignment but wow wouldn't you know it Kris is kind of a Jade too (imo). Space definitely fits with Kris's alien gimmick, but she's also someone who can have her head in the clouds and does things her way to reach her goals even if others don't understand. As a Witch of Space, Kris is both very powerful and very social, quick to form bonds and use her strengths to help as much as she can.

Drew Gulak = Mage of Mind

THE LEGAL EAGLE IS A MIND PLAYER YES. Drew likes to insert logic & reasoning into everything and definitely has his own idea of what is Right with some interesting methods on how to get there (see his campaigns). He is very strategically minded, also being a technical wrestler, but more so for his own goals--which often have some kind of greater purpose--and in the ring than as a team strategist if that makes sense (hence Mage).

Swamp Monster = Muse of Life

Swampy is a very passive social creature literally made of plants. He cares deeply about those around him to the point of self-sacrifice, traits associated with both the Muse class and Life aspect. Remember what he did for OC? :'''(((( Also, despite being bullied by Chuck I think Swampy inspires a lot of morale & happiness for the GC.

BONUS - I haven't figured out a class yet but Lil' Kazu is definitely a Light player. He strategically plays the long game in his matches, he's the Rainmaker (fortune is highly associated w/ Light), and his post-excursion career in njpw started with him trying and eventually taking the spotlight from Tana.

I also originally had Wheeler Yuta too, but I don't really agree with what I decided, especially w/ the recent storyline.