#but i look back at all my accomplishments in the last 10 years and i always have to tell myself

[frootyrooties]

it’s gonna be kinda strange living in nevada after living in new york for 10+ years. i’m sure it won’t take long for me to get used to that west coast life tho.

[voluptuarian]

caught in a very catastrophising mindset today and it would be easier to get out of it if all these dire predictions weren't supported by decades of real evidence

[loveneversleepss]

TROPE SERIES: Lee know

Brothers best friend

requested by @aakamiLee on wattpad

Pairing: enemy!Lee know x female reader

Trope: enemies to lovers, fake dating

Warnings: cursing, bickering, mean and nice nicknames, time jumps (bc im lazy), smut, protected sex (we're responsible for once), unprotected sex (Oopsie), oral sex, betrayal, yelling?

w.c: 10 k

~

There's a big difference between love and hate. Who you love and care for are forever in your heart, you'll follow them to the end of the earth. But hatred, it's made out of pure evil. It sinks into you until you can't push it out anymore. You deal with it in ways that aren't right. Until, you accept it. Make peace with it. Then that's when it goes away.

I guess that's why villains or enemies are seen as more powerful and better. Attractive sometimes too. Because they've made peace of their hate. They're gonna use it to fire themselves into getting what they want. Because they're not afraid. They'd let the world burn for what they love. Meanwhile hero will sacrifice what they love to save the world. And you'd choose the villain every time.

If there's anyone you have a strong hatred for, it's Lee know. Ever since you were a child, he had it out for you to embarrass you and tease you at any moment he could. On the way you'd dress, the way you talked, or the way you walked. He would say something about it. You didn't know what or why he always would make fun of you. What could possibly possess him to do that?

"Wow, y/n. Could you get anymore dorkier? Look at what you're wearing," he'd snicker.

There was never a moment he would spare you, or do anything to prove he was good. He was a bully, an enemy and you would never side with him. You promised that to yourself. But you'd hate to admit, he's gorgeous. Breath taking.

But there was one person who was disgusted by him and hated him even more than you did. Hyunjin. Your knight in shining armor. He was even more beautiful than Lee know.

"I know you're not talking with those tight jeans, Lee know." He came by your side and defended you. Lee know looked embarrassed on the spot.

You were thankful for him. You survived Lee knows bullying tactics thanks to him. He was your best friend all your childhood years. But he had to leave. You knew it wouldn't last. But you had hoped it would. The last day of elementary school, you dreaded it and wished it didn't come. But it did, and he moved away after that day.

"Don't worry, y/n. I'll come back for you, I will never forget my best friend." He hugged you tight and he whispered sweetly to you, "promise me you'll wait? Promise that you'll never have another boy at your side, I'm the only one for you." And you intended to keep that promise.

How the years fly by. Senior year. Graduation. This is the final year. The final time to experience everything you possibly can. And you will.

"Y/n!" You heard your name being called by your brother, Chan. He's practically legend at your school. He graduated a year ago. At your school, you have a record of seniors who experienced things no one else has before. He accomplished to host all senior parties. How does one even manage that?

You made your way down the stairs in your pajamas. "What?" You yelled back and made your way to the kitchen. "We're going out, don't burn down the house, and don't go anywhere." He said in a busy tone as he texted in his phone. You saw Leeknow standing next to Chan and you glanced at him confused. "Since when were you two friends? You don't even go to our school anymore, Chan." Chan made eye contact with Lee know and back to you. "Because I'm actually cool, unlike you, lil sis. I have friends and you so desperately need to get out more." He slipped away before you could answer and you glared in his direction.

You turned your focus back on Lee know as stared at you with a smirk. "Cute pjs," he joked and you rolled your eyes. "Well excuse me that I don't look like a supermodel in the morning." He seemed amused and leaned over the table, "it's noon and Saturday. Why don't you go out with us, huh? Get put of your comfort zone, gain a social life or something." You scoffed and took a couple steps closer, "I have a life and friends. I don't need to be drinking and partying all the time." He straightened his body up and crossed his arms, "name one friend you have." He was skeptical of you, you have to admit. Making friends is not an easy task for you.

"Hyunjin," you said confidently. He laughed practically in your face. "That loser? He moved away a long time ago, it's time you move on sweetheart." You were done with the conversation and flipped him off as you walked away. He rushed to stop you, leaning against the wall before the stairs. "Come on, get ready. It'll be fun." That's all you need. To attend a party with your mortal enemy.

"No thanks." You shinned a fake smile at him and you walked up the stairs. "Jeez what a loner," he mumbled and you looked down at your pajamas. Suddenly feeling self conscious. Maybe you should start going out more. You stopped mid way on the stairs and he had begun to walk away. "Do you really think it would be fun?" He turned back around and rose an eyebrow mischievously. "Yes, it would." He crossed his arms, you immediately noticed his veins and the tone of his muscles appearing. You have to admit, if he wasn't your mortal enemy, you would find him attractive.

He followed your eye path to his arms and cleared his throat. "Just go get ready loser." You frowned and continued going up the stairs and got ready.

You peaked around the corner and saw him leaning against the wall in the kitchen, waiting for you. "Yeah, Chan. It's fine I can take her. I'll be there soon." He hung up and you cleared your throat. He turned his attention up to you and smiled slightly, you began to walk down the steps with a slight shyness. He slowly made his way towards you and... He wolf whistles at you.

"Okay, ew." You rose your hand and made a face of disgust. He smiled. "It's just nice to see you actually try to fit in for once." The backhanded compliment hit you in the face like a truck. You huffed and crossed your arms, "why can't you just say I look pretty? You don't have to insult me." His expression dropped and his eyes softened, "okay I'm sorry. You look pretty." The Lee know apologizing for once in his life? You're shocked and frankly, scared. He must want something. "Okay now you're being strangely nice, what is it that you want? Girls? Money?"

He smirked as he looked down at your hands. "Did I maybe convince you to go out with me out of jealousy that I would get with a girl?" He slowly moved to the first step as you walked down to him. How the hell did he come to that conclusion? Delusional. "Are you jealous, little y/n?" He leaned against the wall. You laughed in disbelief and crossed your arms. "Of course not, no, I'm not jealous." He smirked and licked his lips, "Uh huh." He sighed heavily, "Just admit it, you're in love with me." You mock a laugh at him, "Um, no."

He raises an eyebrow at you, "Is that so?" He steps closer to you, almost toppling over you, "even when I do this?" He places a lock of your hair behind your ear and stares into your eyes, you try to ignore the heart beating fast in your chest. "Just leave me alone, jerk!" He laughs softly to himself as you push him away. "You're hot when you're mad." You narrow your eyes at him with annoyance as you walk away. He always does things like that just to get you flustered, you should be able to say you're used to it but you're not. He makes you nervous and barely able to stand when he touches you. You don't know why he has that effect on you but he does. And you hate yourself for it.

~~~

You'd never would've imagined in a hundred years that you would be in a car with Lee Know right now. It's frightening really. "So, what is all good about that Hyunjin guy? You seem to be in love with him or something." You rolled your eyes and continued looking out the window, "i'm not in love with him, he was just really nice to me." He scoffed and sat up straighter in his seat, "you're obsessed with him because he was nice to you? God, y/n, you really need to go to this party." You huffed and sat more back in the seat. You eventually arrived and heard the music booming in the distance, he parked neatly. But he hasn't motioned to leaving yet, awaiting your move. You always pondered a question and never had the guts to say it before to him, but you're feeling pretty bold right now.

"Why do you hate me?" You looked over your shoulder at him, he was clenching his jaw hard. "Who said I do?" He turned to look at you two, since when has he had that sparkle in his eyes? It's mesmerizing. He looked down to his water bottle in the cup holder and decided to take a sip. "Are you fucking with me?" He practically choked at your bluntness and hit his chest a couple times. "I mean you have made every single thing I've ever done incredibly hard and made fun of me every chance you could." He set down the water bottle and looked into your eyes once again, "it was the only way I could get your attention." You shook your head at him. "There are other ways of getting my attention, being mean is not one of them." You opened the door and slammed it shut in annoyance, he followed closely behind which annoyed you even more.

You walked into the party and realized, this is definitely not your element. "Scared, little one?" Lee know whispered into your ear. "Just not my element, can you get me something to drink?" He looked guilty all of a sudden and licked his smooth lips, "so uh. About what I said about you basically getting out of your comfort zone. Maybe drinking should not be one of them." You wanted so badly to beat him up. Rip him apart to shreds. "What? Come on, I need to unwind." You faced him now and shot puppy dog eyes at him, "pretty please?" He stayed silent for a while, just looking down at you. "Okay, I'll be back. Stay put."

Yeah, no way you're staying put. You took the opportunity when he left to explore around, leading into a den in the house. You became face to face with a man with long black hair, kissing a woman on the couch. You instantly recognized him, Hyunjin. He broke away from the kiss with an amused smile and the girl noticed you and stared with a judging look, he followed her gaze and laid eyes on you.

What. The. Fuck. "Y/n?" You turned away quickly and bumped into Lee knows silhouette, knocking your drink all over himself. "Ugh, dammit y/n." He noticed your face and immediately searched around for the cause. Lee Know's gaze locked from him to you and then back to him. His jaw tensed as he stared at them both and it clicked, that's also his ex girlfriend. Tears began to fill in your eyes, and he pulled you close. He led you to a bathroom far away from them. Tears fell down your cheeks, pooling your mind.

"Listen to me, y/n. Fuck them. He didn't deserve you anyways." You leaned against the sink as he desperately tried to wipe away your tears. You shook your head while sobbing, "I can't believe it, I was an idiot to love him. I wasted all this time waiting for him." Now he was shaking his head, "no, y/n. Don't think like that. He's the idiot and you should beat his ass for doing that to you." You sighed heavily and pushed him away by his stomach, wiping your own tears. "God, I wish you wouldn't see me like this. Please don't make fun of me for this."

He stayed silent. "God, you reek." You sat down on the closed toilet lid. He looked down to his shirt, "oh right. I forgot." He took of his jacket, wrapping it around your shoulders, and off his shirt went. Pulling it off his shoulders, and wetting it in the sink. You couldn't help staring at his sculpted physique, he was ripped. And there was one thing that stood out to you, a small scar located a little above his waist. It was so unique and beautiful, you wanted to trace along it. He noticed your staring, "what?"

You stood up and walked over to him, he froze as you stared down at his scar. He backed against the sink. You slowly raised your hand and touched his stomach, "it's pretty." You traced along it, his chest rising up and down as you slowly caressed it. "Y/n," he whispered softly and you looked up at him. His cheeks were slightly red and you instantly knew he felt embarrased. You yanked your hand away, "sorry." He shook his hand and mumbled a, "its fine."

He continued to try to wash away the alcohol from his shirt as you watched. "I'll wash this later." He drained it and you gave him his sweater back to cover him up. He paused before reaching for the door, he looked back at you, "do you wanna go home?" You nodded your head, "yeah. I wanna go home." He put his arm around you and led you outside, not once letting you astray from his grip. You hadn't noticed before, but people were staring at you, you heard faint whispers. "Who's that girl with Lee Know?" "She's pretty." "Wait I think that's Chan's little sister." You shook off their conversations, of course they were talking about you, you were with Mr. King of the parties. He opened the door for you and you were about to enter when you heard your name being called. You took a deep breath and turned to the culprit. "What do you want Hyunjin?"

"Just let me explain." You glanced at Lee Know and he nodded his head for you to put Hyunjin's ass on blast. "Explain what exactly. That you didn't have your tongue down her throat, while you told me to wait for you all these years and forbade me to have a boyfriend? Please, how much of a fucking loser are you to get someone's sloppy seconds?" Lee Know held in his laughter as he brought a fist to his mouth. He looked visibly proud of you. "Yeah, we're done here. Let's go."

You held the door to enter when he yelled out, "you think you're so fucking high and mighty don't you. You wanna pick out my relationship but not the one right here," he motioned at the two of you, "I mean come on y/n. He fucking made your life a living hell, don't you remember the times you cried in my arms about him, wishing that he would die?" You suddenly felt small, he exposed you bare and you couldn't deny it. Suddenly, there was a crowd watching from afar that you hadn't noticed from afar.

Lee Know stepped in, "get over it. She doesn't want your fucking ass and is perfectly happy without you. Whatever she said in the past is definitely not how she feels anymore, now she loathes your ass. So, tell me this.." He stepped closer to him and you suddenly realized why everyone fears him too, he's not afraid to point out the obvious and speak up, he whsipered something inaudible to him. Hyunjin clenched his jaw and had a face of anger. He walked away defeated and Lee Know laughed as he did. You looked at Lee Know differently now, he stuck up for you when no one else did.

Maybe in another universe, you two could've been friends. Maybe he's not so bad afterall. Then you realized how rude you were to Hyunjin.

"My god, I'm turning into you!" He chuckled as your hands covered your face. "Is that so bad?" You nodded your head yes aggressively and he rolled his eyes. "Lino~~~" Oh God, as drunk as ever your brother came over to you two. "Chan, why did you drink so much?" He collapsed on the car and burped loudly, classy. "Okay, let's get you two home."

~~~

"Does he always get this drunk?" You asked Lee know and he shrugged his shoulders. "Sometimes, only when he's stressed I guess." You plopped down on the couch and he collapsed next to you. You both sighed heavily and tried to relax. Although it didn't last long, "how are you feeling about tonight?" You shook your head, "let's not talk about it..." He cares, he cares about what you're feeling. "It's weird, isn't it?" He furrows his face in confusion, "what is?" You smiled slightly as you looked at him, "those moments where we don't hate each other." He sighed once again, "like I said. I don't hate you."

"I know." You do know that, but in your heart, you can't shake off the past. "But I know you hate me, and that's okay. I'll make you like me someday." You laughed softly, you're already starting to. You start to think about the party again and a light appears in your head. "What if we strike a deal with each other?" He raised an eyebrow, obviously interested. "What if we pretended to date?" He dropped his head back and sighed, "what do I get out of this?" You scooted closer to him, "well it'll make your ex jealous, plus it would also make Hyunjin jealous too... and maybe he will regret not being with me. Also increase my popularity." He sucked on his teeth, "seems this only benefits you, I couldn't care less about my ex."

You pondered and searched your mind for a benefit for him, "fine then, you get me." His eyes widened and he brought his head back down to normal level, "excuse me?" You leaned onto the couch on one arm, holding your head, "you heard me. I'll let you hit it whenever you want." He scoffed, "I'm offended that you think I don't have access to that already." You bit your bottom lip, "but it's not me. It's different, I'm your enemy." He squinted his eyes and blinked about a thousand times, like to actually think about it. "So, you're saying you want to have hate sex?" You almost giggled and shrug your shoulders.

"I knew you were in love with me." You smiled and shook your head, "like I said, no." He mimicked your position and got closer, "so if I told you I wanted you right now, spread out and making you cry for it. You would do it?" You made a face of disgust, "okay don't make it weird. But essentially.. sure. After all if imma lose my virginity to someone, might as well be you." He retracted his face is shock, "wait you're a virgin? God, you were really waiting for him, huh?" Unfortunately yes, you were.

He licked his lips and nodded, "okay fine. I'll be your fake boyfriend. But that means that you can't fight me on couple duties and don't tell Chan." What have you gotten yourself into?

He seemed to keep up his end of the deal, to not be able to get away from him, even at school. Your phone began to ring and you reached into your book bag, more of a tote bag and answered it. "Hello?" His voice was excited and jumpy, "hi y/n.~" You nearly hung up the phone as soon as he spoke. "Lee know?? How did you even get my number?" You audibly groaned his name. "Your brother~" he cooed. "Remind me to murder him later.." He laughed softly and you felt butterflies appear in your tummy, you clenched your stomach and nearly punched yourself to make it go away.

"Why are you calling me?" You cross one of your arms across your chest and the other holding up your phone. "That's how you talk to your savior? Your brother told me to take you home." You groan aloud and begin to walk down the path to the front. "Why didn't he come for me?" There's a loud beep of a horn and you stop into your tracks. "Sorry, apparently that car didn't see me.. maybe he wanted us to spend alone time together." You roll your eyes. "I highly doubt that." He clicks his tongue, "so where are you?" You continue your walking again but go even slower. "I'm hiding, or maybe im at home or maybe im in Hyunjin's car. Could be anywhere really as long as I am away from you." This feeling makes you feel upbeat, you like teasing him.

"Tell me where you are right now you brat," he speaks quickly in a rude tone. "Okay, first of all, rude." He sighs heavily and then chuckles softly to himself, "nice dress, Princess. Can I take it off?" Your phone slightly drops down when you search your surroundings for him. You furrow your brows when you don't find him. "How'd you know I-" You scream as your feet are lifted off the floor, being carried from behind by your waist. "Found you," he whispers and attacks your neck, biting it playfully and pretending to eat it while making gurgling noises. "Okay, okay, enough! Put me down!" People were staring.

He sets you down gently and you toss your phone back into your bag. "Here, let me get that for you." He deattaches your book bag off your shoulder and onto his. "Thanks," you mumble softly. His arm cheekily raises over your head to your shoulder, "So, what are we doing today huh? Going to dinner? Or a fair? Maybe even the movies?" You stopped walking, pushing his arm off and your mouth was slightly agape as he looked at you curiously, "what are you talking about? We're going straight home." He pouted his bottom lip, as you noticed his car. Without waiting, you marched straight to it and to the passenger's side door, about to open it until he slammed it shut.

He leans in close, keeping a firm grip on the door. "We have to go out," he said softly, you shook your head no as you kept trying to open the door. "Come onnn, let's go on a date. You were the one who said you wanted to do this fake dating thingy." He whined pathetically and you knew he was just messing with you. So obviously you had no intentions or interest in saying yes. But you did anyway, just to mess with him. "Hmm, why not?" He perked up immediately and stepped closer to you. "Really?" "No," you said almost immediately and he frowned. "Well too bad because we're going anyway." He finally let go of the door and opened it. You glared at him as you went in and he softly smiled.

~~

He took you out for ice cream. It was nice. He was nice and complimented your dress. He took you home afterward, and surprise surprise. No Chan. "Great, I don't wanna be alone... Come inside?" He looked at your front door and then you. "Can I cash in?" Already? You weren't prepared yet. And weren't exactly ready to give it up yet. "Oh, I haven't prepped or anything." He stepped closer to you, merely inches away. "I don't need all that, just you." But why the hell not? The sooner the better.

You led him inside and up into your room, making sure to lock the door. He wandered about as you quickly went into the restroom to touch up, the door was open to keep an eye on him. You walked in after a couple minutes and he was sitting on the bed, looking at picture. One of you in elementary, playing in the grass alongside Hyunjin. "I always thought you were so pretty when you played in the grass, I never got the chance to go with you. Your protector prohibited it." You approached him slowly and sat on the bed. You pulled the picture out of his hand, "forget him. I'm here now."

His eyes scanned your face as you tossed the photo aside. You prepared yourself, first kiss, first everything would be with him. He leaned in slightly. "What if my brother finds out?" His hand slips behind your ear, tucking softly at your hair strands. "He won't," he whispers against your lips. He stares into your eyes, flickering down often back down to your lips. "God, you're so damn beautiful." He pressed his soft lips into yours, taking you whole. You sighed in relief, it's as magical as you thought it would be. Moist and soft as pillows. Connecting two bodies into one.

"Don't stop," you mumbled against his lips. And he didn't. He entered his tongue softly into your mouth, entangling his with yours. You moaned at the feeling, the pleasure intensifying and all your doubts fade away. He reaches at the bottom of your dress, pulling it up above your waist. Revealing your underwear and tugging at it. He strokes at your concealed clit, he smiles. "You're wet for me, baby?" You almost moaned at the nickname. You felt shy now that he pointed it out. "You're sure you want to go through with this? I can stop."

You don't want him to stop. "Don't you dare stop." You pulled him back into your lips. You felt him smile against your lips. He pulled your dress over your head and laid it onto the floor. You reached for his belt. He stopped you as he took it off himself. You crawled back higher in the bed for room. He undressed himself until he was in his underwear too, the beautiful scar appearing once again. You couldn't help but stare, he is beautiful you have to admit. You reached for his pants and pulled out an aluminum wrapper. Holding it in his mouth and crawled toward you seductively. You giggled as he appeared on top of you and you took the wrapper out of his mouth.

He kissed your neck which made you melt in his touch. It felt like heaven and sent tingles down your body. Intensifying the building pleasure. He reached around your back and unclipped your bra. You weren't expecting it and gasped, so easily slipping it off. He attached his lips to your breast immediately, making your back arch as he sucked on it softly. His fingers teased at your entrance, playing with your panties and slapping it against your sensitive skin. "Don't tease me," you whimpered and his eyes turned dark with lust. He grabbed the wrapper from you and slipped down his underwear. Your mouth dropped, you weren't expecting it so suddenly.

You felt compelled to look at it and dragged down your panties. He groaned as he made eye contact with your pussy. He opened the wrapper and slipped it on neatly and swift. Getting ready and you prepared as he positioned himself. He entered smoothly and you moaned aloud, you covered your mouth but he pulled it away quickly. He kept your hands above your head at your wrists and the other positioning himself into you. You felt so full. "Fuck, fuck. It feels so good." You whined out as he continued to bottom out into you. He finally stopped pushing until you. The pain and pleasure mixing.

You moaned happily and tried to break free of his hold. "God, you're fucking perfect," he whispered. The praise got you going even more. He pulled out to the tip and pushed back in. You moaned heavily again as he began to set a rhythm. "Fuck, you're gonna make me come if you keep clenching like that." You wrapped your legs around his waist to encourage him. "Cum if you want to, just keep going." You've never talked like this to anyone. He let go of his grip around your wrists and readjusted your legs. Laying your ankles onto his shoulders and holding your legs close.

He pushed back into you and you practically crumbled in his hands. The pleasure was intensified, heightened. You cried out as he mercilessly pounded into you. "Please, please" you begged although you didn't know what. His thumb rubbed against your sensitive bud and you pushed away with your hips. You whimpered out as he kept abusing your body. "What's wrong, can't take it?" He teased you which made you angry, you hate being teased especially by him. It's his favorite thing to do.

"I hate you. I hate you. I hate you." You chanted against his rhythm. "I hate you so much," you mumbled to yourself. He smirked, "keep talking and watch what's gonna happen." A challenge, you know you can't resist. "I hate that I love this so much," you laughed breathlessly, "I hate that I love you fucking me." You squealed as he turned you over onto your stomach. He pushed your neck into the sheets and arched your back, a sting on your butt appeared. You whimpered at the pain, he slid on once again and you screamed into the pillow. "Keep going," he whispered into your ear. And so you did, confessing all what you were thinking.

"I hate that you're so attractive." He pulled your hair into a bundle and moaned softly. Butterflies appeared in your stomach, he was enjoying this, enjoying you. "I hate that you know exactly how to make me crumble in your hands." Tug. "I hate that I crave you at times I shouldn't." He begins to pound up into you fast and harsh, making you a moaning mess. "I hate that I've wanted you all these years!" You want it, want it so bad. You need a release. "That's all I wanted to hear," he whispered sweetly into your ear and pulled your face to kiss him. You cried out into his mouth as he mercilessly grinded into you. He moaned loudly, his hands bracing onto your hips as his pace slowed. But he kept going, for you.

He snapped his hips into you once, twice, and you collapsed. Like a thread being cut. A knot being undone. A firework finally exploding. Release, sweet beautiful release. He talked you through it, "that's it. Just let it go, princess. You're doing so good." You relaxed in his arms, feeling him slip out of you slowly. You suddenly felt empty now, without the comfort of him. He laid you down softly onto your back. "You okay?" He cooed at you as he brushed the hair out of your perfectly happy face. You nodded your head, "what are you smiling about, hm?"

"I'm just happy." You were. He gave you an experience that you'd dream of. He pulled back to yank off the rubber, and threw it away into your bathroom trash. You got up reluctantly to pull your underwear back on. But once you felt your feet hit the ground, a sharp sensation drew up your back and you stumbled onto your knees. He came running to your laid as you laid helplessly, "ow."

~~~

You two had a conversation after, establishing some boundaries. "Okay so first off," you underlined the top of the page titled, agreement. "We are not allowed to fall for each other, no romantic feelings whatsoever." He nodded in agreement as you scribbled it along the page. "Have to show some sort of affection in public for fake dating purposes... and make a public appearance at a party or something." He sighed heavily and rolled his eyes. "It's not that hard okay? It can be a simple gesture like a kiss on the cheek or a hug." You wrote it down.

"And I get to have my benefit whenever I want." He mentioned as he snatched the paper away from you and wrote it down. "As long as it's not in front of other people, I'd rather not flash my pussy to a stranger." He chuckled at your bluntness. "Oh right one more thing," you took the paper back. "Agreement will be void once goal is made aka I get my crush or broken." He stared hard at you, confusion in his sparky eyes. "You still want that guy? After all he did?"

You shrug your shoulders, "I mean I get it. You get lonely without someone to love. And plus, now I know the benefits of having someone." You cheekily rose your eyebrows at him in a playful way. He sighed and looked away. "I don't understand why you don't want your ex back. Didn't you two love each other?" He shook his head and you laid the paper onto the table in front of you two. "Why?" He sighs, "because she isn't you." You look at him confused, scared. "She isn't you... as friends, we have a connection, we light up around each other. I don't have that connection with her. I crave a connection if I want a relationship."

You understood what he meant. You do. You two seem to always encourage each other and be confident. You're not afraid of telling him anything. He changed the subject. "So, what did you mean that you've wanted me all these years?" Oh shit. You'd forgotten about that, your ears begun to stung. Might as well come out with the truth. "Well, I've always found you attractive. I just didn't wanna admit it."

"Yeah, I kinda have that effect on people." He flicked his imaginary long hair. You cackled out at his demeanor. "So that basically means you fantasize about me, huh?" You scoffed jokingly, "okay enough Mr. Cocky," you threw a pillow at him and he laid in defeat.

You had to begun to hang out at school with each other more. His friends had grown accustomed to you now. It was working, everyone believed you two were together. But thank god it was Friday, you hate school. You were sitting at the table where his friends were, waiting for him to arrive when you noticed his ex. Glaring at you with such fire in her eyes. "Hey," Lee Know said and you jumped once you felt his hand on your back. "Hi," he pecked you on the cheek. "You okay?" You nodded, while still looking in her direction, he noticed and followed your gaze. His eyes darkened as he noticed that she was whispering to her friends while looking at you. You felt suddenly conscious of yourself.

"Imma go okay?" You said softly to him but he grabbed your wrist to stop you. "Don't go, I'll handle it." You shook your head, "it's fine. Don't ruin anything between you two because of me." His eyes screamed at you to stay but you couldn't. You couldn't stand sitting there while she talked about you. So you walked away, feeling an ache in your stomach. You went to a nearby bathroom and washed your face. You stayed in there, looking at the mirror at your clothes. 'It could be better,' you thought. Maybe you'll go shopping.

You walked out upset and bumped into a tall boy. "Sorry," you said as you pulled away. "Y/n?" You stared up at him, that familiar face. "Hey Hyunjin." You stood silent, awaiting what he would say, it seems like he's got a lot on his mind. "Look I just wanted to say about how sorry I am for the other night. It was stupid and I don't even like the girl, I swear. I cut ties with her." You sighed heavily and put your hands in your sweaters pockets. "Let's just forget about that okay?" He nodded his head and you turned to leave.

"Wait," you stopped and looked up at him once more. "How about we go out tomorrow? So I can really make it up to you. Meet me at our spot at 3?" Your spot, you haven't been there in a long time. It's a big playground, you two would always meet up there in the past and just talk. "Sure, I'll be there." You walked away and find a stray Lee know again.

"Where'd you go?" You smacked your lips, "I have news!" His eyes creased and a small smile emerged. "Hyunjin asked me to go out tomorrow, as an apology." His smile quickly faded, and his eyes dropped down to his feet. "Isn't that good? I have to go shopping after school though, for some clothes." He nodded his head quick and reached into his back pocket, pulling out his wallet. "Get something nice for yourself okay?" He hands you a couple of big bills. "No, no. I don't wanna use your money." You try to hand him it back but he pulls away. You sigh reluctantly and put the money into your pocket.

He leans forward into your ear, "maybe you can buy something nice for the two of us, hm?" You instantly knew what he meant, lingerie, and your face reddened at the thought of it. "Don't be naughty."

It was the next morning, and Lee know had shown up to question you about Hyunjin. He sat next to your floor mirror on a seat cushion. "And you'll be alone?" You rolled your eyes as you grabbed your shopping bag, pulling out the new dress you bought. It's a navy blue and tight fitted, you're planning on wearing some stockings with it so you won't be completely exposed. "You're stressing too much about this." You said while walking over to your bathroom to change, bringing the bag with you. "Yeah, because I care about you."

You began to dress behind the door as you listened. "I just don't want him to try anything funny." You walked out, over to the mirror, in front of him, "It'll be fine, it's in public." He stared at you, scanning up and down and you smiled happily at the result. "So.. do you like it?" You turned to him and did a twirl. "Love, I'm not even looking at the dress." You sucked in a breath and smiled, you lifted your hair and tried to assess if it looked good. "Hmm, hair down. Only I get to see you with your hair pulled back." You knew what he meant to that too.

Which reminded you of the surprise you had for him. You had noticed a lingerie store next to the dress store. And you gave in, picking out a white set. After all it is his money, he'll enjoy it. "Hold on, I have a surprise for you." You skipped over to the bathroom and changed into it. It hugged you beautifully, a blinged out corset top with see through panties, attached was some laced stockings. It came with a light cover dress, it was flowy and very pretty. You bit your bottom lip as you gazed at yourself. Definitely out of your comfort zone, but so is everything.

"What's taking so long-" He pushed open the door and his face practically dropped. His eyes didn't know where to land. You shifted on your heels, "do you like it?" He said no words. He lifted you up from your legs and hung you over his shoulder. "Hey, what are you doing!" You screamed out and kicked your legs, it was useless. He dropped you onto your bed and quickly ran to your room door, locking it. You didn't know what he was doing, you only assumed. He wants to fuck you again.

"Get on your knees," he ordered you without hesitation. You've never seen him like this, so dominant. You slowly dragged yourself onto the floor. Gradually getting onto your knees, you looked up at him through your lashes. He slowly unzipped his pants and you gulped. You know what he wants. He pushed down his pants to his ankles along with his boxers. You stared at his length, rock hard. "You have no idea what you do to me," he said as he stroked your cheek. It felt so innocent in this setting, it soothed you. He wrapped his hand around himself and pressed it to your lips. "You know what to do."

You parted your lips slightly and pressed a soft kiss onto him. You moved his hand out of your way, replacing it with yours. And slowly, seductively, teasingly, you kitty licked at his tip. He hissed as he watched you. He grabbed your hair into a ball, holding it out of the way to enjoy the show. Finally, you pushed him into your mouth, you held down your tongue and tried your best not to gag. It was impossible and caused your eyes to fill with tears. "Fuck," he muttered under his breath, and he tugged on your hair aggressively, pushing your head. You didn't care, he can use you all he likes.

"Fuck, I need you right now." You hummed against him and he moaned out loud. You were beginning to feel a glow in between your legs. He pushed your mouth off of him and you got onto the bed. He threw his shirt off and you could cum at the sight, he's so breathtaking. He ripped your sheer dress off you, "hey don't ruin it!" He growled, "my money, my girl, I can do what the hell I want." You're not his girl, you were about to correct him when he pushed aside your panties. One of his fingers entering inside of you and you moaned. Prepping you for him.

He took out a condom and once again slipped one on with one hand, what an expert. He planted his hand next to your head and kissed you softly, his kisses were always so gentle. He slipped into you, beginning a rhythm and you moaned loudly into his mouth. He pulled away, "I feel that good?" You nodded your head quick and did not even try to be quiet. Your arms slipped around his neck and you closed your eyes in pure bliss. He was grunting hard, like he was gonna finish soon. But you knew he would keep going even if he did. He started to go faster while his moans were getting louder. You felt a slight shoot get blocked off and the condom fill up.

You felt a rush of pleasure come over you, you felt your high coming in close. You started to whimper out and clawed out his back. He then began to trickle kisses down your neck but you felt a slight sucking sensation. "Don't," you said breathlessly, "I'm still going out after this." He stopped and you saw how angry his expression was. His rhythm slowed down unexpectedly and you made eye contact with him. "Keep going. I'm so close," you begged him. "Uh, uh. You want to go out still? You don't get to finish." And he denied you of finishing. He pulled out of you.

You groaned, annoyed. "Why are you so mean?" You whined as he moved away from you. He smiles, "because," and kisses your cheek. You frown. He took off his condom and threw it in the bin next to your bed, you had planned ahead by putting one there. But you had your own ideas. As he laid beside you and stared at the ceiling, your hand slipped off your panties. Your hand slipped down between your folds, and circled your clit. You moaned out as you stared at Lee know, making eye contact. He shook his head disapprovingly. You were only to this to make him realize he made a mistake.

"Mm, Lee know," his name slipped out of your lips so easily. You made sure to sound as breathless as possible. It was working as you saw he was getting hard again. "I won't engage," he told you but you knew he was lying. "Fine," you stopped and got on top of him. "You won't play with me?" You grabbed his now hard length and held it lined up to your entrance. "Y/n, don't. I'm not wearing-" You ignored him as you slid down slowly. You braced yourself onto his stomach and moaned out pathetically, why did he never let you experience it raw before? It's addictive.

He feels crazy good. You can feel every ridge and curve. Everything hits the right spot. "Oh my god," you gripped onto his chest. "Oh my god," you screamed out in glee. The build up is threatening to snap, and you love how it's feels right before it does. "Thats it, my love. Let it out," he whispered sweetly to you. Snap. And you go falling down onto him.

~~~

He begged you not to go, but you weren't going to stand up Hyunjin. You couldn't... At least not without an explanation. You walked over to the park, he was no where to be found. Your phone began to ring, unknown caller. You answered it, "hello?" There was a sudden burst of laughter, a girl. "Oh y/n. Did you really think he was gonna go? You're quite stupid to think that." You recognized the voice, Lee knows ex. "He ditched me?" There was a noise of scramble on the other side. "Hello y/n." Hyunjin. You gritted your teeth. "I like your dress, very revealing. Did you go shopping for me?" You looked around and saw no one, suddenly you felt cold and began to walk out of the park.

"Why are you doing this?" He laughed softly to himself. "It's payback, you betrayed me by getting with Lee know." Anger began to pelt up inside you, "I never betrayed you. You betrayed me." He laughed once again. "But something smells fishy doesn't it? I think it's you." Just then you turned when a loud car pasted by, the window was down. Splash. You were hit with a bucketload of water. You gasped as you fell to the ground from the weight. You screamed when you saw a fish had been through with it. You didn't know what to do, you ran.

Home. You don't know where that is. All you knew was him. You needed him. His comfort. His words. You needed to go to him.

~~~

You knocked on his door repeatedly and rang the doorbell. Clutching your soaked body and sobbing out. The door swung open fast, when his eyes landed on you. He had a look who could kill. "Who did this to you?" You didn't want to answer. You knew he would go after him and that's the last thing you wanted. "It's none of your business." You said calmly. "You're my fucking business. What happened?" He spit out his words and tears flowed down your cheeks once again. "I'm gonna kill him." He stormed past you but you clutched onto his arm. "Please don't leave me. I need you here."

His gaze softened and immediately took you into his arms. "I'm not gonna leave you, I swear." You smelled, really bad. But he didn't care. He held you for so long. You wish he would never let go. "Come on, let's get you cleaned up." He led you inside and into his bathroom. He lives alone. You remember that, no siblings, parents gone. It must be awfully lonely. He sat you down on the toilet lid while he turned on the water for a bath. Putting bubbles in it. You laughed amused to yourself, he has bubbles for himself?

He looked confused at you, "feeling better?" Your face fell sullen again. "Get undressed," he said and pulled you off the seat. You pulled the dress off and the stockings. He picked them up and waited for you to take off the rest. You turned away from him and took off your underwear. You got into the water and sat down. He left with your clothes and came back with his own, a hoodie and some shorts. Sigh, no underwear. He was respectful when he came over to you, only looked at your face. Nothing else. He scrubbed you clean and gently rubbed shampoo into your hair.

You could've done it yourself but he insisted. He said he felt bad for letting you go. For letting them get to you. "I'm sorry this happened y/n." At least one person actually cares for you. He left so you can dry yourself and get dressed. After you did, you walked into his living room. Wandering around his place and found him in the kitchen. He had a pan of butter grilling, while he was cutting some freshly washed asparagus. "Hey, hope you like steak,' he said as you walked to his side. There was a plate of seasoned meat sitting next to the cutting board. "You're the whole package, huh. Everything a girl would hope for." He laughed softly, "hope she comes soon."

~~~

You had slept at his place that night, after having a full tummy and a movie night on his couch. You got to talking. "Tell me a lie that you've told yourself all your life." He asked while putting an arm on the couch behind your back. You smile softly, "that we can't be friends. I should've given you a chance a long time ago." You laid your head against his arm, your body still facing him. "So you don't hate me anymore?" You didn't want to admit it so you just smiled and looked down.

"Say you hate me, y/n." You glared at him, challenge in your eyes. "Say it," he curved his head and gave you a stern look. You tried to lose your smile but laughed when you said, "I hate you." His tone was playful. "Say it like you mean it." A smile crept up on your lips, "I can't."

You two were silent now. "I don't hate you Lee know. I guess your charm has finally won me over." He pulled your body close to his, "good. We can finally be friends now, best friends." Your eyes began to drop, heavy with sleep, "Yeah, I would like that." You fell asleep. And woke up in his bed.

"Good morning sleepy head," he said sitting up. You stretched out, looking down at his hoodie. Forgetting that you had it. "What time is it?" You mumbled and rubbed your eyes. "Time to wake up," he said while grabbing his phone. "Look at this," he flashed a photo up at you, a picture of you lying on his chest. "Delete it," he shook his head. "It's my new wallpaper." You tackled him, attempting to snatch the phone out of his hand. You huffed once he shoved it into his bedside drawer. "Come here," he whispered and motioned to his lap. He pulled you over, and you laid onto him, straddling on him.

You set your head between the cradle of his neck and shoulder. Your arms resting around his neck. This feels nice. Comforting. "Thank you," you grazed your fingertips against his arms. His arms wrapped around your waist. "For what?" His chest flowed up and down, "for being here, with me." He hummed and traced his hand up your spine. "You're being so sweet all of a sudden." Your head slowly raised and your thumb lined his lips, "I'm just happy I have you." He looked at you suspiciously, "you want something don't you?"

Your eyes snapped up at him and he tilted his head in confusion. You smiled, he caught you, "feel like exploring?" He sighed and tried to look annoyed. He looked up at you with a soft look and stroked your cheek, "I didn't think you would want to do anything.. Aren't you tired?" You shook your head, you leaned forward to his neck. Removed his hands from your cheek and sprinkled kisses. He pulled back and you frowned, "I want you to do what I did for you the other day.. the stuff with my mouth?" His tongue rolled inside, along his cheek. He cheekily smiled, "You want me to do that to you?" You nodded your head and pouted.

"Aww, anything for you," he rolled you over onto your back. He pressed his lips against yours softly, igniting you. You pulled him to stay, gripping his sleeves. You moaned against his lips once you felt his hand pulling at your shorts. "I like seeing you in my clothes," he whispered against your lips. "I like being in them," you teased him back, "but I'd rather not have any on with you." He tilted his head once again in surprise. You took the opportunity to scatter your mouth against his neck. This time he cooperated. "You're becoming more and more like me."

You smiled against his neck and began to suck against the sensitive skin. He pulled away after a few seconds, he looked down at you, "oh so when you do it, it's okay?" You shrugged your shoulders, "you can do it to me if you want." He immediately got to action. He pressed his lips to your neck, you felt yourself flush. He sucking harshly and you winced softly, he kissed down your collarbones and lifted your shirt. Sucking on your breasts, it seemed it was letters of some sort.

He finally stopped after a while, he kissed your lips. "Ready?" You smiled and he crawled down your body. Your hands laid on your chest comfortably. Once his wet lips pressed against your inner thigh, you gasped. You almost closed your thighs in surprise. "Just relax for me, baby." You did and released the tension. He softly laid your legs onto his back. You could feel his hot breath on your core and it was driving you crazy. Finally, he set his lips onto you. Your hands crashed into his hair.

He kissed your clit softly causing your body to jolt. His eyes looked up at you, dark and sparkling. He looks perfect like this. You grab your phone from the bedside table, he put it there to you. A capture an array of pictures of him, "do I look pretty?" He asks and you nod your head. His tongue makes its way and pushes into you. The pressure building in your stomach. You set the phone down beside you. He attacked your clit again, sucking and kissing while his fingers entered inside you. It was too much, your body enjoyed it too much. You let go. Cracked.

You felt light headed, minutes, hours seemed to pass by in a second. "Holy shit, are you okay?" You nodded your head and a warm presence kissed your cheek. You cooled down and hugged his body close to yours. "Feel like going out tonight?" He asked softly, looking into your eyes lovingly. "Yeah, but I want more." You said as you pulled the covers over you two.

~

"I have nothing to wear!" You cried out in your closet. "You have plenty of clothes, you just went shopping." You searched in the pile of clothes on your floor, "I don't know if I want to wear a skirt or a dress or pants." He sighed heavily, "it's gonna rain tonight." You frowned and picked up a pair of pants, better to be comfy than cold. "I'll would wear a revealing top to better the outfit. But someone decided to leave hickeys that say MINE on me." You pulled out a shirt and showed him it. He crossed his arms, "wear what you want. I can fight."

You hit him with the shirt, "there will be no fighting tonight. I want just want to chill and enjoy a beer." You pull the clothes on quickly and turn to him, shooting him a look that says 'how do I took?' "You look beautiful," he cringes immediately after the compliment leaves his lips and you giggle to yourself. "Wow, can't say anything nice without cringing."

~

The party was pretty boring. No fights. No arguments. Just what you wanted. Just a night to chill with some friends and your brother. Chan questioned you about where you were, "you were gone the whole night." You pushed him away, "like you're not gone for days at a time. I had a rough night and crashed at a friend's." He seemed to believe you and moved on. It was technically true. Lee know is your friend.. friend with benefits? Fuck buddy? Best friend? One of those.

You walked over to a group where Lee know was chatting with his buddies. They tried to tease him by lifting up his shirt but he quickly dodged their attempts. "Come on guys. You know he doesn't like anyone touching or seeing his scar," Chan scolded. Your eyes darted to Lee know. He doesn't? But he let you, he didn't care when you saw him, saw his scar. When you traced your fingers along it. "Whatever, I need a drink." He walked away from the group and he grazed along your arm for you to follow. You did, and immediately questioned him, "I didn't know you didn't like when people touch you there." He didn't answer for a while. "I don't." You whispered softly to him as he grabbed a cup. "But you let me."

"Isn't it obvious y/n?" He took a big gulp out of his cup, chugging it down. "What is?" He looked into your eyes, searching for something, something that you should already know the answer to. "Never mind," he shook his head off and began pouring himself another drink. "No, what? Tell me." You snatched the cup out of his hands and he almost pouted. He leaned against the table, "I'd only let you because... I have a soft spot for you, I think you know the reason why." You blinked heavily, "but I want you to tell me, not for me to just guess." You looked down at the beer in your hands and took a small sip, it's bitter.

"I'll tell you later," he grabbed the cup back from you and took a sip. "You either tell me now or never." You walked away from him, he followed behind and you went outside. To have an actual private conversation. Its raining. You stopped at the end of the driveway, next to your brother's car, and awaited his answer. His hands were in his pockets and he stared at the ground. Water dripping down his hair and body naughtily. "So?" He looked up and shook his head, you sighed heavily. "God, you're such a coward." He furrows his brows, "excuse me?"

"You're a fucking coward. You talk all this nonsense saying you're sure about yourself and you're really not. You're pathetic." He raised his tone, "fine you really want to know?" You stood, wet, the question was seeping into your skin.

"I love you y/n."

You blinked a thousand times again. You stepped back and shook your head in disbelief. Disappointment. You both agreed that your relationship wouldn't go past any feelings. "Is that so hard to believe?" He said since you weren't saying anything. "I thought we agreed no strings attached, that this would never turn into something." He groaned and his hands flew up into his face, rubbing against it crazily. "How could you have not known, y/n? All these years I've waited for you, tried to get your attention just so you would look at me, like me!" You swallowed down a build up in your throat, feeling a heavy feeling. "It's you, y/n. It's always been you. Why can't you see it?"

"I don't chase girls, I never have. I never wanted to. But I'm chasing you." You fist your hands into a ball. He tries to approach you but you push him away. "Don't push me away," he pleads. "I'd like to go home now." You said bluntly. His eyes saddened, glassy with tears. You walked to his car, the rain was pouring down even harder. You turned angrily at him. "Why? Why now? Why did you never tell me this!" He shakes his head, "I didn't know how to say it." He paused. "But it's true, I love you y/n. And I never want to stop saying it." Tears begin to mix with the rain pouring down your cheeks. "I have loved you ever since I have known you."

"You're fucked up, you're fucking everything up!" He nodded his head and walked in a different direction, past you. You chased after him. "Don't walk away when I'm talking to you." He stopped next to his car, "what is there to talk about? I know you don't like me." The feeling in your chest was heavy, you know what you have to do. What to say. You find the words in your heart, you know what you feel for him. "I love you." He stops. "You're actually stupid if you don't realize how much I love you," you add and smile.

You look into his eyes, his mesmerizing eyes. "But I have to make sure, that you really do love me-" "yes." He cuts you off so sure of himself, like it's as easy as breathing. "Yes, I love you y/n," he runs up to you and involves you into a kiss. It's sweet and soft, butter against your lips. "There's never gonna be anyone but you." You smile, a smile so big and genuine, you feel as if you're floating. It dawns on you, "my brother is going to kill me when he finds out." He laughs against your lips, "don't worry about that."

~~~~~~~~

[thatswhatsushesaid]

i have been obsessing over this extremely short moment post-sunshot campaign for weeks now trying to put together a lengthier post about it, but i think the screenshots themselves arranged chronologically speak for themselves. so i will just post them and then talk about the framing, because i’m insane about it.

just about everyone else on this side of the banquet hall within the scorching sun palace is looking towards jin guangshan as he speaks—everyone except for:

1) jin guangyao, who is staring straight ahead with a startlingly flat and resigned expression on his face, despite being seated in a position of honour beside his brother, and

2) nie huaisang, who is obviously TRYING to pay attention, but his attention keeps wandering between looking at nie mingjue, and looking at jin guangyao

(also he gets no further commentary/acknowledgement from me but look at jin zixun back there just lounging in his seat like a smug spoiled brat. ugh. step on legos forever jin zixun.)

the camera shifts its focus while jgs keeps talking to zero in on jgy’s expression. this deliberately highlights and provides us the chance to see his expression in more detail. and it is so hard to discern what he is feeling specifically beyond “not great,” but what stands out for me is: he isn’t wearing his usual polite, customer service mask, the one he managed to keep in place both during the introductory sequence at the cloud recesses in the face of so much mockery from the jiang sect disciples.

so what is that expression? what is going on in his head that he can’t play the part that he’s perfect for years now, when he has supposedly almost achieved everything he ever dreamed of accomplishing for himself and his mother? i mean, i have my suspicions of course, because we know what is going to happen very soon.

and then—

—the focus of this scene changes, drawing our attention away from jin guangyao towards nie huaisang where he’s seated just behind nie mingjue. because nie huaisang is not paying attention to jgs’s speech or watching his da-ge. unlike everyone else in this banquet hall in this moment, nie huaisang is looking at jin guangyao, observing him in this moment where his polite mien has failed him, and god what i wouldn’t give to know what is going through his head!! because:

1) i don’t for a moment believe nmj told nhs the details of what transpired between him and jgy during their confrontation in the scorching sun palace. i don’t think he did this as a favour to jgy or to lxc, either. imo this decision would be consistent with nmj shutting down any discussion of what caused him to exile meng yao from the unclean realm back in… uhhh, episode 10?? when nhs, wwx and jc all converge in the unclean realm throne room to ask about meng yao’s fate. (yeah it was episode 10.) anyway for all we know this is the first time nhs has seen his old body guard/babysitter since he watched meng yao totter feebly into the wild blue yonder all those months ago, and now here he is seated in a place of honour between jin zixuan and his da-ge, looking perhaps even more miserable than he did while bleeding from a giant sword wound in his chest. it is entirely consistent with nhs’s character to be like ‘???? what is up with this??’ but not even he is bold enough to ask jgy what is up in the middle of this banquet, not with da-ge right there.

2) his expression is ALSO harder to read than it would have been when they were last together!! but there are clearly gears and cogs shifting and ticking and whirring behind his eyes, and the fact that the framing calls attention to nhs noticing jgy in this moment when it’s quite clear no one else does is one of many hints the show is dropping for us that nhs is more than just a lackadaisical and absent-minded second son. he notices things that no one else does—but, as with jgy, we are left to guessing as to what he is thinking, and what conclusions he is drawing.

well okay it looks like i managed to write a lot of words down about this after all!! go me.

[somejazzinthemorning]

tightrope. 11

Pairing: Carlos Sainz x Original Female Character Warning: Mature content Word Count: ~18K

It takes a lot to understand the truth when it is covered under years of hearing the same words. The word exploded around me, in screams and chants, confetti and champagne, but it all felt dull because when the phone rang the following morning, it was not “Papà” that was written on the screen.

It was not the day before, either. Or the days that followed.

Monday morning. 10 hours past the race, and Dad had not called.

Rio called right after the podium. The words tumbled from my lips, breathless and infused with the rush of adrenaline when I picked up the phone from Rocco’s hands and accepted the call. Racing down the pitlane, phone pressed to my face, I could feel the dampness of champagne against my skin and Rio’s voice erupting from the other end of the line, from the other side of the world.

“Eva! What the hell?!”

I was shaking—every cell in my body reverberating with the thrill of what we’d just accomplished. Time seemed slowed down, every detail around me sharper, more vibrant. My skin was covered in goosebumps, a mix of elation and disbelief coursing through me. My lips tasted of champagne, the sweet fizz lingering on my tongue. As my eyes flickered around the pitlane, taking in the sight of the small crowd of mechanics waiting for us at the end of the pitlane, the flags waving on the stands and the vibrant colours of team gear in the pitlane, a loud chuckle left my trembling lips, my fingers grip stronger on the trophy.

Reality seemed distorted, stretched over whatever material dreams were made of.

“A podium finish, Rio! A fucking podium finish!” My words blended in the cacophony of the team’s cheers, a symphony that echoed through the pitlane, now replacing the sound of the engines that had filled the air for the past six hours.

Ahead, Alexei, Alessandro Bianchi for more official affairs, set the pace. His legs were so long and quick it seemed like he was almost running. He was the one driving the car during the final laps. As for Henrik and me, we spent those last laps in the garage, our attention fixated on the car and the unfolding Corvette narrative. Shifting from that nail-biting tension to becoming drenched in a cascade of champagne, it was the blink of an eye.

Henrik's arm found its way around my neck, playfully pulling me into him. His tall frame towered above mine. “Time to drop the phone, DiMaggio. Let’s join the fiesta!”

“It’s my brother. Give me a minute.” I looked up, meeting his frowning face. “Promise you. Just a minute.”

Henrik was Finnish, had hair as fair as sunlight and eyes as blue as the ocean. He just nodded, and then I freed myself from his pull, walking to the side, finding support in the pit wall.

“I knew you could do it, ‘Vita. Sooner or later!” I pressed the phone against my ear, attempting to amplify my brother’s voice. “Get your head right, and everything else will fall into place. Look at what you just did.”

“I drove for less than 2 hours—”

“And you put the car exactly where it needed to be.” There was a genuine awe in my brother’s voice, something that I wasn’t quite used to listening to. Dad wouldn’t react this way. As a matter of fact, he didn’t react at all. “Those overtakes! That place must be going wild for you right now.”

I laughed, looking ahead. Alexei was climbing a mechanic’s back, his 36 years of age eclipsing as his face went full of joy and he looked like a child.

“Yeah. It’s… pretty insane.”

“The race ended less than half an hour ago and we’re already hearing your name all over the hotel. And we’re just having breakfast. You have no idea.” I’ve never heard Rio speak so fast in my life. A clatter resonated from Rio's end as if he was dragging a chair, and then his voice returned. “By the way, your timing is impeccable.”

“Why? What happened?”

My brother chuckled. “You managed to steal Carlos’ thunder on race day.”

“Shit, he’s starting on pole, right? Wish him luck for me.”

"No need to.” Oh. I was not ready to hear him. "I'm right here." A blend of excitement and wistfulness churned in my chest, a familiar pang of longing to be in two places at once. He wasn’t right there. Not anywhere close. “Man—Eva…” His voice rang again, I pictured the smile on his lips, as my name resonated. “You’re absolutely incredible.”

I leaned against the pitlane wall. Champagne dripped from my hair onto my face, the lingering taste a testament to the euphoria of the moment. I glanced upward, the raucous celebration of the team unfolding before me, champagne bottles raised high, exuberant cheers filling the air. Then, I looked down, at my wet fingers wrapped around the trophy,

“I wish you were here,” I murmured, my voice a soft whisper carried away by the wind. “Both of you.”

“DiMaggio!! Leave the phone!” Alexei called for me. In large, determined strides, he made his way toward me, holding a champagne bottle in his hand.

"I'll make sure to save some of this energy for when we reunite," I mused, my voice tinged with a mix of anticipation and longing.

“Hang up!” Alexei screamed, a playful edge to his tone as he quickened his pace. Henrik was behind him, holding another bottle. Their trophies had been left in the garage, on top of the car.

“Hope it won’t take long.” Carlos's voice, filled with warmth and affection, was the last thing I heard before the joyful chaos consumed me again, drenched in champagne and carried on my two teammates’ shoulders, back to the small crowd.

But then Monday came. With a throbbing headache and a dehydrated body, after a too-over-the-top evening packed with celebrations. My phone rang on the nightstand, and after picking it up, Nicola and Lin's faces filled the screen.

“You’ve got toothpaste on your cheek,” Lin pointed out, her surroundings showing the sturdy brick of her New York flat. She was back home, I didn’t know that. Somehow, I still thought she would be in Europe. “And congratulations on the race, by the way!”

Nicola sat in a dimly lit room, a soft white glow illuminating her face—by background noise that filled the air, I associated that the white glow was probably the glow of her TV. “I hate this time zone thing. Can’t stay long, sorry, hubby’s waiting for me in bed. What are you up to today?”

I glanced at the corner of the phone, noting the time. It was a bit before 7 a.m. It was probably around midnight for Nicola. As for Lin, it was a little past 7 p.m. I wiped away the toothpaste from my cheek and sat back on the bed, too tired to move.

“I have an interview today. At the track. In like, two hours. They’re doing tire testing, and James Anderson thought it would be a nice background for the interview.”

“James Anderson? The James Anderson?” Lin's enthusiasm was palpable as she turned in her chair, getting up from it seconds later and walking to another point in the room. The unsteady movement of the camera made my stomach churn. “Girl!”

Nicola laughed softly. “Eva, on a scale of 1 to 10, how freaked out are you?”

“A big ass 11.”

“You've got this in the bag,” Lin's voice chirped through the phone, her enthusiasm cutting through the fog of fatigue that lingered in my mind. “Unless you’re still a bit drunk from last night.”

“Just a tiny bit,” I admitted, flopping back onto the bed. The sudden motion made me feel queasy. “Yeah. Fuck. Not exactly drunk, but way too hungover for this. I don’t even know why I said yes to the interview. There’s literally nothing to talk about.”

“He did an amazing piece on the race. Well, an amazing piece on you,” Nicola chimed in. “I’ll post it tomorrow on the team’s socials.”

“That’s why Rocco convinced me to say yes.” I rolled over in bed, seeking a hint of comfort from the pillow and the soft comforter. “Why? I don’t know.”

“Get out of bed, or you'll fall asleep,” Nicola urged. “Also, get out of bed so I can go to bed.”

“You can go. I'll keep her company and help with what she should say.”

“She knows it better than you do,” Nicola was right. I was usually the one media training my clients, providing them with a bullet point list of acceptable topics and answers. So, technically, I should be able to do it for myself. But exhaustion from the weekend's efforts, compounded by a hangover, left me feeling drained. “Don’t you?”

“I do. But I’m just tired. I really, really don’t want to do this right now. I have a belly ache.”

“Eva, come on.” Lin moved again, her energy almost overwhelming enough to make me feel nauseated. “If you get nervous, just imagine the man in his underwear. They say it helps.”

I burst into laughter, the absurd mental image of James Anderson in his underwear momentarily banishing the exhaustion that had weighed on me. “Who says?”

Nicola threw her head back, laughing in response.

Lin grunted. “Them. People.”

"Thanks for that mental image, babe. I'll keep it in my back pocket."

As the laughter subsided, my eyes caught the corner of the screen. Time was passing. The interview was getting closer, and the reality of facing the camera was beginning to set in. Lin's expression turned earnest. "Seriously, Eva, you've got this. Stop overthinking. Just be yourself and ride this wave of success. You're on top of the world."

“That’s what scares me.”

And just like that, a frown appeared on both of their faces. Nicola's frown was more pronounced due to the glow of the TV in the background. Then, she clicked her tongue. “Ah, that’s why you wanted us to call.”

“Exactly.”

“And here I thought you were just missing us,” Lin teased. “Seriously, babe. You’ve got this.”

“Tell us what’s wrong.”

"It's just that sometimes…. I don’t feel like I deserve this? Like it should be harder than it is. Yeah, I can race. And yeah, I'm good at it. Pretty good. But the pressure? The questions? The idea that people are looking at me and expecting me to fail… I've been sick to my stomach just wondering what's happening next because that's what all those goddamn reporters kept asking me yesterday. And—I don’t know. I feel like my Dad is right. I'm not fit for this. ”

“What did that jerk say to you, again?”

“Lin, he’s her dad.”

“Yeah, and he was, is, whatever, my boss. Screw him, honestly. Eva, listen.” She paused and slid one of her lock braids to be back of her ear. “I hope you know he’s a loser, and everything he does and says is just a reflection of how much of a loser he is. He needs to control your life in a way he never got to control his—”

“Lin—”

“No, I don’t care. Listen.” She paused. Nicola took a deep breath, and I followed suit. “He’s your dad, I know. But I’ve been there and I’ve heard the stuff he says. I know him. I worked with Rio when we were both fresh out of college, and I've seen the way he treats both of you.” Again, I attempted to stop her, but she raised one finger. “And I've had enough. The fact that he’s your father isn’t a reason for him to be as mean as he is when things don’t go according to his plans. I've seen him blame Rio, in front of the whole team, for a storm on a test day because he should have known—”

“A test day. Yes, well, those are usually…”

“I don’t care. He’s your dad. He parades you around the way he thinks is best. What did he say this time?” Lin had a way of cutting through the noise and getting straight to the heart of the matter.

“A lot of stuff about how this sport isn’t for me and how he can’t understand my change of mentality in the last few weeks… How I fit better in an office. Just—a lot.”

“Of course he can’t. He never understood you at all. He’s not a good man, love.” She paused. “And I’m sorry.”

“But he’s my dad.”

“He is,” Nicola hummed. “But that doesn’t mean you owe him anything. You’re your own person.”

“Actually, I owe him my entire career.”

“Just because he has the money. And—Think: he never did one single thing for you that would risk his money. For heaven's sake, he made you race in The Challenge after you spent a year at home, struggling with anxiety and depression and he didn’t care if you were ready or not. The only thing he knew was that he was going to lose money if he didn’t get a driver in that seat. Rio was completely done with racing and there was no one available to take the remaining spot.”

“But I wanted to race.”

“I know you did.” Lin’s voice softened. “But like that, hun? From FRECA to The Challenge? We hoped you'd advance to at least any other regional series. Or that he would push for F3, he did it for Rio and, let’s face it, he’s not half as good as you.” I took a moment to absorb her words. They were raw, unfiltered truths that I had been avoiding. “It felt like you were back to square one. Doesn’t surprise me that you kept yourself busy with that college friend. Amanda, right?”

“Yes. And I still am. Keeps me busy. I can't have too much downtime, or else I go crazy.”

“Exactly. So…” Nicola interjected. “That’s not how it should be. You need breaks. You need downtime. You need to rest. You just had a break, and you had the time and the peace of mind to find your groove again.”

“I was in good company. In a nice place. And was busy with that said company.”

“See? So the issue is your Dad. It’s been what? Two weeks since you came back from Mallorca, and you just got a freaking podium, and now you’re struggling again because your Dad said things that made you overthink everything. You were so happy during the weekend, what happened?”

“He didn’t call. I thought I had proved him wrong and he didn’t even bother to call. And he’s my dad, you know? And now James Anderson is going to ask me stuff about the future my dad is holding in his hands. And I don’t want to answer.”

“Okay, let’s…” Nicola took a deep breath, her hand reaching for her hair and pulling it back. I sat up in bed, realizing it was time to gather myself. “You are holding that said future. Get the fuck out of bed, put on some makeup, and head to the track. Do the interview. It will go well. Don’t overthink the answers. It’s PR and you’re great at that. So just—think you’re one of your clients. And if your mind starts spiralling, Rocco is right there; I know he can keep you occupied if needed.”

Lin burst into laughter. “Oh, he can definitely keep her occupied.”

“Gross. He’s technically an employee.” I retorted. “And I bet he’s taken.”

“I’m sure Pulcini will be around, too,” Lin added, and I finally got out of bed, leaving my phone on the credenza, capturing me as I moved around the room and picked up my sneakers. “Or have we moved on from him?”

“We’re not focused on that because I’m working!”

“Can I finally go to bed? I want to get occupied, too.”

“No one here is getting ‘occupied,’” I remarked, slipping on my sneakers. “But yes, go to bed. I’ll do my makeup and head out.”

“It will go well, baby,” Lin said. “And if it gets weird, well, remember the underwear thing.”

The pit lane buzzed with activity, a hubbub of conversations and the clatter of rattle guns. Standing amidst it all, I found myself at the center of attention. The warmth of the sun kissed my skin, while in the distance, I could hear the sounds of the paddock being packed into trucks.

Before me stood James Anderson, his lanyard hanging casually over his chest, almost masking the fact that he wasn’t just another journalist, but the renowned James Anderson himself. Two chairs were positioned at the heart of the pit lane, a camera strategically placed near the pit wall, and a bustling garage composed the backdrop. Alexei and Henrik occupied the seats on the pit wall, their legs dangling, dressed in relaxed t-shirts and jeans. Matteo was in his race suit, totally recovered from the food poisoning episode, and ready to take on the test day.

The car would leave the garage in 20 minutes, so we had exactly that time. Not one minute more.

Despite the camera, Anderson held a notepad in his hand. His salt-and-pepper hair danced with the wind, uncovering his eyes, and sparking with curiosity. I noticed the subtle lines around them, testimony to the countless years spent witnessing greatness on track.

“Happy we can do this, Eva. I've been trying since your victory at Imola. Exceptional performance at the Challenge, too, by the way.”

I wasn’t aware of this desire to interview me earlier. As a matter of fact, I wasn’t aware he was even aware of my existence until he met me in the garage, after the podium ceremony.

"Well… now, we have more to talk about," I remarked, my smile flowing naturally. Anderson nodded, directing his gaze toward the cameraman, a signal to commence recording. "Be gentle with me," I quipped, playfully brushing aside my anxiety.

His laughter rang out. "No need to worry."

Casting a final glance at Alexei and Henrik, the latter waving at me just before Anderson shifted in his seat, reclaiming my attention, I took a final deep breath. This wasn't within my training regimen. I was nervous. My belly aching.

“Eva, let me start by congratulating you on your remarkable performance this weekend. You stepped in for your teammate Matteo Serra during the practice session. Could you walk us through how you adapted to the situation so quickly and what mindset you had going into the race?”

I nodded. My hands were on my thighs, fingers almost melting with the fabric of my jeans. Jesus. This was hard. On top of that, I could feel Alexei’s coal eyes on me, the intensity of his gaze travelling above Anderson’s shoulder, boring into me.

“Yeah, well. First of all, thank you,” I began, a smile tugging at the corners of my lips. The sunlight played across my face, warming my skin as I spoke. The journalist's expression seemed to relax, his posture slowly becoming more open. “Ahm—right, honestly, it was a whirlwind. Stepping into Matteo’s shoes so unexpectedly meant a quick mental switch. But that's what we’re trained for and what the team expects from me. I had to quickly familiarize myself with the track and the car's nuances… So, the team support was crucial, really. Alexei and Henrik were amazing the whole weekend,” I glanced towards my teammates, looking at each other, smiling. “We worked together to ensure a seamless transition, and I'm truly grateful for their trust.”

The slight tremor in my fingers betrayed the composed façade I was trying to showcase. I could feel the weight of the race weekend on my shoulders.

“Your performance during the race, particularly your amazing overtakes, drew the attention of many in the paddock.” The reporter went again. “Can you share the strategy and approach you took to navigate through the field and secure that impressive fourth-place finish?”

“Well, thank you again.” I chuckled softly, the sound carrying a mixture of humility and genuine pleasure. “I’m not used to this, I’ll admit.”

“Just being honest.”

“Okay—well… the strategy was a mix of precision and calculated risk. The adrenaline was pumping, and I was fully immersed in the race… And when the command to push came, and I realised the team trusted me, I just went for it. My general approach was to find those windows of opportunity without compromising the overall strategy… I mean, we had more pace than we expected and we had to make something out of it. We didn’t qualify great, what was a boomer, because we had faith we could qualify in the top 10. So, that not being the case, we had to be at 110%. The team did amazing with the pitstops, and the guys did amazing stints as well… And.. Since I was feeling comfortable with the car—thankfully I drive a similar car in another series, so it became a bit easier… I had to go for it. So, yeah—It's quite surreal to think about it now, but… I'm still in awe of how everything came together.”

My gaze drifted to the marks of tire rubber still visible on the asphalt. I could almost feel the energy of the cars rushing through the main straight, my feet vibrating with the phantom energy still running around us.

“You mentioned the team’s trust… DAR Racing's decision to extend your stint turned out to be a wise move since we could clearly see that you were getting gradually more confident in the car and risking more. At your level, with so little experience, how did you manage to maintain your focus and energy during that crucial period of the race? Did doubt quick in or…?”

This time, I couldn’t find comfort in the details on the pitlane. Anderson’s eyes didn’t leave mine. Curiosity glistened through his dark eyes, his passion and interest so clear. Probably he had noticed my state on the radio. The thousand questions I asked, how I pressed from lap times and places of improvement. I was freaking out inside the car. Properly. I wanted to go fast. Faster. I wanted to come out of every corner perfectly.

“Interesting point… Yeah—So…” I took a moment, my hands subtly trembling from a mix of lingering adrenaline and fatigue. My eyes flickered toward the reporter, his expression a mix of interest and empathy. “Maintaining focus and energy during the stint was undoubtedly challenging.” Pause. A small breath. “As the laps went by, I did feel a surge of confidence building within me but the team's strategy and encouragement played a huge role in keeping me on track, both mentally and physically.” I chuckled softly, a glint of self-awareness in my eyes, realizing the play of words. “But yeah—doubt is a natural human response in such a demanding situation. I’d never done anything similar. Or even raced for this much time. What was it? A bit more than an hour and a half?” Pause. He nodded. “Yeah. So. There’s a lot involved and a big part is the mental game. I'm grateful I had the right support system to keep me motivated through the race.”

Alexei's presence stretched through the pitlane, his supportive gaze feeling like a reassuring anchor. Henrik, with his elbow perched on Alexei’s shoulder, sent me a nod of approval. They were witnesses to the doubt, to the lack of sleep on Thursday night when I was notified that Matteo was on his way to the hospital, after throwing up for almost one hour straight and my body and mind couldn’t seem to handle the fact I would be driving that weekend.

They were patient. They made it possible.

I couldn’t help but smile.

Anderson, probably noticing the silent exchange, looked over his shoulder. Turning to me, another question hung on his lips. “You seem really in sync with the team. And all throughout the weekend, I've noticed that many drivers and personnel from rival teams came over to congratulate you, especially yesterday, during the celebrations. Could you speak about the role of… camaraderie and sportsmanship in your approach to motorsports?”

“Absolutely,” I affirmed with a genuine smile. “Those values are essential aspects of motorsports for me. Racing is not just about individual performance—it's being part of a larger community. Every driver—rather, every person on the paddock shares a common passion, and that creates a unique bond. I believe that mutual respect and support make the racing experience richer and more fulfilling. When rivals come over to offer their congratulations, it shows that we're all part of a shared journey. And that helps put things in perspective.” I paused, my gaze returning to the journalist's attentive expression. “I grew up with a lot of good examples of great sportsmen, from different ages and backgrounds. They inspire me to be the athlete I am. And I learn from them. I know and I’ve seen that being in sync with my team and everyone around me is paramount. And about the team… we're like a well-oiled machine, working together to achieve a common goal. The team’s trust in me and my trust in them is the key to achieving an environment where we can perform at our best.”

“What happens now?” Anderson leaned back on his chair, crossing his right leg over the other. “What are the plans for the future? Do you think this race opened a couple more doors your way?”

It’s PR, I remembered myself.

“Right now, I'm still taking in the incredible experience of this race and savouring the team's success,” I began, my voice carrying a blend of satisfaction and excitement. “Looking ahead, the future holds exciting possibilities, that’s for sure. But we still have a few races this year, so we'll continue to analyze our performance, identify areas for improvement, and build on the momentum we've gained. And as for my personal journey… I believe this race has indeed opened a couple more doors for me. It's a validation of the hard work and dedication I've poured into my career. It’s not been easy, and the road has been long and hard, so it’s positive to see how it’s unfolding. I'm truly ready to embrace whatever challenges and opportunities come my way. Whether it's stepping up to compete more regularly, collaborating with other teams, or pursuing new ventures—I can say I'm determined to make the most of the doors that may or may not open and strive for even greater achievements in the future. Whatever they are.”

“I remember seeing you in FRECA, and it was a shame you didn't have a chance to end your amazing 2019 campaign.” My teeth sunk into my bottom lip. I was not expecting to go so deep into the past. “Did the unexpected end to the season, with you not taking part in the last races of the season, have anything to do with the break you took in 2020 and the new route you took last year?”

“Yes, well—” I moved in my chair. “The end of the 2019 season didn't go as planned, and it did play a role in the decisions I made afterwards. However, the break I took in 2020 was primarily a result of some personal issues and the need to focus on my overall well-being. With the pandemic, that forced me to slow down, I realized that I needed to take a step back, regroup, and come back stronger.”

As I spoke, the memories of that challenging period flickered in my mind—the uncertainties, the doubts, and the eventual realization that prioritizing my mental and emotional health was essential. 2019 was supposed to be my big year, the breakout. Yet, it was an utter nightmare. Losing a seat over team politics and small-minded men, especially when I was a championship contender, felt worse than anything I’ve ever experienced.

“Can you elaborate a bit more on those personal issues?” Anderson tilted his head.

“I understand the curiosity, but I'd prefer to keep the specifics to myself.” Once again, the reported nodded.

"It's known you took a different route and you've not been driving full-time since then. Do you see racing as a hobby? It’s a very expensive one to have.” He chuckled. I moved in my seat.

Well, you would never say that to a man, I thought to myself.

“It’s certainly far more than a hobby for me. While it's true that my journey has taken a unique path in recent years, it's important to note that every step I've taken has been with a specific purpose.” I paused, not sure if I was truly conveying the message I aimed for.

2020 had been tough. Mom and Dad quarantining in Verona, with my grandparents. Rio focused on his heavily pregnant wife and, later, their newborn twins. Carlos was… doing his thing. And I was at home, being consumed by a monster that fed on my own sadness and self-doubt. I didn’t want to project that image. The world couldn’t know that person.

“As you know, the commitment, dedication, and effort required in motorsports are immense and it's not a pursuit I take lightly.” I continued. “As with any other driver, there are challenges outside racing. Some can handle them better than others. I felt the need to stop for a while and take it easy on myself. That doesn’t make me less of a driver.”

“Is this hybrid mode, if I can call it that, helping with those issues?”

“It helped, until now. A lot of other drivers have a business on the side, that’s just a small percentage of what I do. Did.” I corrected myself. “I intend to be 100% focused on racing next year.”

“What made you take that decision?”

“The timing feels right, both personally and professionally.”

“You’re on a high, that’s for sure,” Anderson said, his hand meddling with his pen. “Considering those challenges you've mentioned, how do you feel your experiences outside the track have influenced your approach to racing now?”

"A lot has been happening these last two years. To be honest, I’m still in the process of looking back, reflecting on my journey and reevaluating my goals. Especially these last weeks… I’ve reencountered some people from the past and it helped me to look behind… It helped me gain a deeper understanding of myself, my strengths, and the areas I wanted to work on. As a result, I'm feeling more like myself. Every good or bad thing that happens is a part of us. And it’s not a setback, it’s just a… detour. A part of the comeback, too.” Anderson smiled at my worlds, I smiled too. “This weekend showed me exactly that—that I’m still the girl I was a few years ago. All the setbacks I’ve found… All my experiences, really, have taught me the importance of balance, resilience, and essentially mental well-being, which I believe are essential not only for success on the track but also for overall fulfilment.”

“And as for the future? Could you tell us a bit more about the specific goals you're aiming to achieve with DAR Racing and in your motorsport career moving forward?”

“And as to the future…” I paused. “My focus is on continuous improvement and pushing my limits. And working on myself. I'm fortunate to be part of a team that believes in my potential and supports my growth. Right now, my goal is to contribute to the team's success, while also aiming to achieve personal milestones, of course. It’s all very in the open, to be honest. As I said, I'm dedicated to making the most of every opportunity and showcasing my abilities. Ultimately? I aspire to compete at the highest level, as any other athlete."

"Highest level?” His eyebrow pointed up. “What do you exactly mean?”

"Competing against the best. Motorsport offers various tiers of competition, and my ultimate goal is to eventually reach the pinnacle of motorsport, whether it's in Formula 1, endurance racing, or any other top-tier championship.” Anderson seemed surprised. I cracked a laugh and he followed. “Doesn’t hurt to dream, does it? I’m aware this journey requires consistent dedication, hard work, and especially the right opportunities. I’m just leaving it in the open." I shrugged.

"So, the single-seaters aren’t out of the question?"

"Absolutely not! Formula 1 remains a dream—more than that, a goal. While my current focus is on endurance racing, I wouldn't rule out the possibility of pursuing a career in single-seaters if the right opportunity arises.”

“That’s bold.”

“Can’t settle for less.”

Anderson laughed and extended his hand in my direction. “That’s the spirit.”

_

Amanda rented a small Airbnb in Berlin, paid for the company, of course, and located less than 5 minutes away from her client’s new store. The floor of the entrance hall was all boxes and shopping bags, greeting me as I arrived. On the corner, there was a small space for my shoes, the only free space, actually, which meant that I had to grab my suitcase and hover it over the boxes, to make my way to my room.

She had texted me just as I landed, telling me she would be at the store all morning and that I could use some time to sleep and rest and join her at the store in the afternoon. And despite being massively jet-lagged, I couldn’t phantom the idea of going to bed at noon. My body was completely disoriented after a twenty-hour flight that had departed from Japan on Monday night and landed in Berlin on Tuesday morning.

The concept of time didn’t make sense at all.

During the flight, I immersed myself in a sea of and stories about myself. The spotlight was glaring down on me, the expectations and anticipation weighing down my shoulders. “WHAT COMES NEXT?” plastered across every other tweet or headline. And, of course, I asked myself the same question.

Little did I realize that my little pastime was nurturing the little monster hidden in a corner of my mind, that I so desperately tried to ignore by eating cookies and Doritos and drinking whatever beverage they had available on the flight.

I’d said more than I should in the interview with Anderson, I realized.

In every other tweet, my name was linked to Carlos, to his dad and to a potential seat in F3 that I knew nothing about. On every social media post, a lot more comments than usual, especially after Marjorie’s Mallorca dump, where I was pictured with Carlos behind me, on the boat, his hand over my shoulder—what quickly became “proof” to our connection.

Too much happening in such little time.

And time didn’t make sense.

And my body ached.

And Even Amanda, whom I thought would be focused at work, was swept up in the buzz of the moment. There was a bottle of Ferrari champagne on the dinning table. “We will open it at dinner”, a small note said.

I couldn’t make tea because I couldn’t find the teapot, and heating up water in the microwave was just too low. I was tired. I needed coffee or tea, or just anything with a strong flavour and enough caffeine, and then I remembered there was a small coffee shop downstairs.

But I was just so tired, and so in need of a break, that my feet took me to the empty room at the end of the hallway and I collapsed in bed. Not to sleep. But just to take a break. To exist and listen to the silence, and to life happening outside, in some random street of Berlin.

The grip of jet lag tightened as Berlin’s heat added to my discomfort.

I rolled in bed.

And then I remembered that for the first time in more than a week, Carlos and I were in the same time zone. And life seemed a bit better. I stretched my hand to the phone. There was a message from him hanging in my inbox. “Call me when you land.”

“Oh, you were quick to pick up,” I said, my voice laced with traces of tiredness.

He chuckled on the other side of the line. “Yeah, it seems I can’t go too long without hearing from you. Is the flat nice?”

“It's cozy. Going to be an interesting experience sharing the place with Amanda for a few days. I had to perform some serious parkour moves just to get through the entrance because the hallway is packed with boxes. She’s not exactly the tidiest person.”

Carlos laughed softly. “As if you could talk.”

I playfully sighed. “I’m sorry, Mr. Virgo, if I don’t live up to your standards.”

He chuckled again, the sound soothing and familiar. "Well, just make sure you don't trip over any of those boxes. I need you whole when you get back."

"I'll do my best," I replied, a grin sneaking onto my face despite the fatigue that still clung to me. "How's your day been so far?"

We fell into an easy conversation, talking about everything and nothing at the same time. His words were like a balm, easing away the remnants of jet lag and anxiety and replacing them with a sense of connection that stretched across the miles. He was still in Italy, getting ready to fly for Zandvoort. It would be a packed week, apparently. Starting on Wednesday, all the way to Sunday. And then repeat all of that for Monza, the next week. At a certain point, he started complaining about Rio and his insistence on taking Team 55 to dinner to celebrate Carlos’ birthday, and then spending midnight together, have a drink and toast to another year.

I would be at said dinner, but that surprise was something Carlos didn't need to know just yet.

Between stories of Amsterdam and Zandvoort and how Spa had gone for him, we finally reached the topic. Japan. The podium.

“About that,” Carlos's voice echoed warmly through the phone's speaker. I settled deeper into the comfy pillows, his words soothing away the fatigue that had clung to me since landing. "You won't believe it, but he couldn’t shut up about you. I've never seen Rio so damn proud as he was on Sunday," he confessed.

I couldn't help but chuckle at the thought. "That's a first," I replied, my voice laced with amusement. "I think he'd sooner admit to believing in unicorns than admit to praising me.”

Carlos chuckled softly, and I could almost picture the affectionate smile on his face. “I barely saw him at the garage. He was around… networking, as he put it. Even took some notes from Caco.”

“He better take lessons from the master. Guess I'll have to rely on him since I don't have Dad to do it for me anymore.” Carlos cleared his throat, and it sounded like a gentle reprimand. “What was that for?”

“You would do it even if you were alone.”

“I don’t have the people skills for that.”

“You do,” he quickly interjected. His words hung in the air, and I scrunched my nose, the silence between us perhaps conveying more than words ever could. “Are you having doubts?”

I pondered for a moment, my body shifting in bed as if searching for a more comfortable posture to handle the subject. “Hm. It’s too late for that,” I began. “I mean, it's all done now, you know? I've adjudicated all my clients to other colleagues. My agenda is clean. I've sent my resignation letter. I’m just tying up some loose ends now.”

“That’s good,” Carlos said, and then a heavy silence enveloped us once more. It felt like a looming shadow, draping itself over me, heavy and dark. “Isn’t it?”

“It is. It just…” I hesitated, searching for the right words.

“Yes?”

“I’m… apprehensive.”

“Okay…” I heard him take a deep breath, and I closed my eyes, yearning for his comforting presence. “Why? What’s going on inside?”

A warmth spread through me, knowing that he cared enough to ask these questions. “Do we really need to have this talk?”

“Yes.” His response was firm, yet there was an undeniable gentleness in his voice. I felt a rush of emotions, a mixture of vulnerability and relief. God. How much I needed him right there at that moment. “I don’t want you to carry the weight of this change alone.”

Something shifted inside me, a sense of support that I hadn’t fully acknowledged before. I let out a sigh, feeling a strange weight lifting off my shoulders. The liberty to be human, and act like myself. To have fears, and doubts and to have the liberty to be vulnerable and share them.

“It’s been a lot, you know?” My voice cracked as my throat seemed to become small. I paused for a second, just to hear him hum on the other side, encouraging me to continue. “I can’t visualize it. I can’t see myself there, because I don’t feel like there is. I feel lost. And tired. People expect me to know what I want. To know the way. To be fierce and decisive, but I'm not that person. At least not now. I'm seeing her again, but I'm still... lost. I have this… thing. An anxiety that lives here, that I can’t put on hold.”

“Eva—”

“No, let me finish. I have more than enough reasons to know I’m kind of good, to know I’m good. But there’s something screaming that I’m not great. That I’m not enough. That I should have never stopped, that I should have started racing sooner…  I mean, take my interview with Andeson.” I paused. “I said too much, people are talking and going deeper into my life, and stalking my socials and making theories about everything. I have people liking photos from 2015, for heaven's sake. And I’m refusing to go on Twitter because I don’t want to read what they’re saying.”

Carlos chuckled, his voice soothing. “That's how it goes, love. It shouldn't be that way, but it's unfortunately part of the package. Remember that’s not what matters.”

“What happens on the track is what matters,” I asserted.

“Exactly,” Carlos took a deep breath before continuing. "I know you like being in your bubble, Eva. I do too. But unfortunately, I'll have to share you with the world if we want a chance to keep your name in their mouths. And we need that chance because you deserve a great seat for next year."

I sighed, understanding the weight of his words. "Share me, huh?"

He let out a playful sigh. "Let me be a bit selfish here. I just got you back, and now I'll have to share you with the world? Unfair."

"Is it really that hard to bear?"

Carlos replied in a teasing tone, "You have no idea. Sharing you with the world? Torture."

I chuckled, his playful tone bringing a sense of lightness to our conversation. "Well, I'll try to make it as painless as possible for you. Besides, you'll always have a special VIP pass to my bubble."

He chuckled, his voice warm and affectionate. "I'll hold you to that. Now…” he hesitated. "I have to leave in… 20-ish minutes. Nap time for you?"

I sighed dramatically. "Yeah, I guess I can squeeze in a bit of sleep."

"Good,” He paused. “You need rest"

"And you're not mad about me missing the GP?"

There was a short pause before he answered, his voice sincere. "I won't lie and say I'm thrilled, but I understand. Work's work, love. And I’ll have you in Monza. We'll have our celebration whenever is possible."

I smiled, warmth flooding through me. "Thank you for understanding, even when I'm disappointing your birthday plans."

He chuckled. "It’s okay, bebé. I'll survive the birthday blues. Just promise me you'll take care of yourself. And get enough rest."

"I promise," I said softly, gratitude filling my voice.

“I’ll call you tonight.”

“Counting on it.”

I nestled back into the pillows, my mind finally quieting down as I let sleep claim me once more. Our conversation replayed in my thoughts, a reminder that no matter the miles between us or the challenges we faced, our bond remained.

_

“Carlos’ birthday is tomorrow,” I said. On the other side of the line, Marjorie's affirming hum tickled my ear. “What do you give a man that has everything?”

Marjorie's voice crackled through, a touch raspy and warm. “Really good head.”

I haltered, trying to muffle a chuckle and glanced discreetly at the man on the opposite side of the counter. I couldn't help but wonder if he overheard her audacious suggestion; it was practically impossible, but his stern expression made me second-guess.

“Let’s keep it a little more PG, shall we?” I whispered, my words barely escaping my lips. “I was thinking more along the lines of a watch. You know, like a normal person.”

She giggled, unapologetic. “Yeah, your denial game is strong.”

“You wouldn’t buy it even if I tried.” I think I sounded more annoyed than I expected, and Marjorie’s quick reply and tone did indeed confirm it.

“True. So, why deny it anyway?”

I shifted my gaze to the abstract painting on the wall, and then to the display filled with bracelets and watches. The light refracted on the screens, glistening and tempting me to pick one of them up. I approached one of the displays. One of the Rolex watches seemed to smile at me.

“It’s complicated,” I murmured.

“That’s your favourite word.” She paused, the silence a bit dull, but I wasn’t sure of what to say. “But you don’t need to say a thing, you know? It’s pretty darn obvious what’s going on between you two. Seriously, even standing five meters away, it’s nauseating.”

“Marge, don’t—”

“Eva, I get it. You want to take things slow, bla bla bla, I know your speech, already. It’s the same for every boy. Nut come on! It’s Carlos! I know you always liked him. And even if he was a stranger… I mean he’s still Carlos Sainz.”  She sighed.

“You won’t shut up, will you?”

“Never.” She paused for a second, and when I thought I could speak, she started again. "We all were in Mallorca, and I've seen enough walks of shame to spot one. And it was almost suffocating near you during Blanca’s dinner. The tension was absurd.”

“What do you want me to say?”

“I don’t know. At least stop being weird about it.”

“I’m not weird about anything. I called you just want your help to choose a gift for his birthday and you didn’t even let me talk yet. Are you and Rio giving him something?”

“Yes. Your brother is giving him something, not sure what, honestly.”

“You’re really trusting him with that?”

“It’s his best friend. If he fucks up, it's his responsibility.” She quipped and then cracked a laugh. I chuckled silently, my eyes drifting through the small collection.

“Going back to my gift…” I brought the conversation back on track.

“Yes…”

“I left the store to go pick up some food for lunch and I found a cute little shop on the way,” I started. It was much more than "cute"—it was truly a hidden gem in the heart of Berlin. “I was thinking of something vintage, you know? A watch… with a leather bracelet, maybe. And I don’t have much time to waste because I’m leaving today to Zandvoort and I can’t get there with anything.”

“He has a collection of watches, Eva.”

“He has literally a collection of everything,” I sighed. “Hence the challenge. I want to stand out.”

“Well, I told you one way to stand out.”

"I'm trying to be a little more sophisticated here," I retorted.

"Oh, do you need suggestions for a no-smudge red lipstick?" Marjorie countered, her suggestion dripping with mischievous wit. “I can help with that.”

“Fuck off.”

“Babe, you showing up there will be nicer than any watch.”

I hummed, my feet tracing the store floors, walking the steps I’d already walked twice or thrice that evening. before calling Marjorie, I’d spent ten minutes in there, staring at the watches, and despite loving the atmosphere and the feeling of all my senses being captivated by the allure of history, I was in need of going back outside and getting some food.

Every piece was a good pick.

Each one with a story of its own, sparkling under the soft glow of the display lights, their gears whispering secrets of forgotten eras, waiting to be unveiled by its new owner.

I picked up a beautiful antique Rolex with a leather strap, the rich aroma of aged leather mingling with the fragrance of nostalgia that permeated the air. It exuded an air of sophistication, and I could already picture him wearing it under the brim of his race suit.

“I’m sending you a pic on WhatsApp.”

And after I did, Marjorie's voice came through the phone, breaking my reverie. "That one is lovely.”

“But it’s so… normal.” I sighed, feeling torn between the classic elegance of the leather bracelet and the desire to find something truly unique for Carlos.

"It’s a Rolex.” She deadpanned. “I swear to God, it’s been years since I married into this family and I still can’t relate to you all. But yeah, somehow I get what you mean. But it's Carlos. He doesn't care about extravagant."

“But I do.”

“Miss,” the shop owner's voice interrupted our conversation, and I turned to face him with a polite smile. "I'm really sorry to disturb you, but we’re about to close.”

I nodded apologetically at the shop owner, realizing that I had been so engrossed in my conversation with Marjorie that I hadn't noticed the time. "Of course, I'm sorry. I got carried away… Marge,” I talked into the phone. “I’ll call you later, ok?"

"No need to apologize," he said kindly, gesturing towards the watch in my hand. "You seem to have a good eye for these kind of pieces. Is there anything specific you're looking for?"

"Well," I hesitated, glancing back at the watch and the man before it put it down in its place. "I'm trying to find a birthday gift.?"

The old man smiled understandingly, his eyes glistening under his round glasses. "Well,” he looked at his watch. “I can spare a few more minutes to help you, miss. Is it for a friend? A family member?"

"A friend. He travels a lot, he’s a racing driver… So I was thinking of something like a watch or a bracelet, something practical that he can carry around or just… something to have at home…? I mean…” I paused, my eyes wandering through the counter, my iris meeting the shiny screens of the watch under the store lights. “He has tons of watches, and now that I’m thinking about it, he’s not a guy to wear bracelets. It’s… a challenge.”

The old man's face lit up, a raspy smoker's chuckle leaving his wrinkly lips. "Ja, I know how difficult it can be. What does that friend value? What does he like?" The man leaned against the counter, his wrinkly hand holding onto the sturdy wood, while the other one traveled to the pocket of his cardigan.

"Meaning, I think," I replied, my fingers tracing the edge of the polished wooden counter. "He has basically everything already, so it's difficult to find something. Not that he's hard to please. Not at all. I'm just very picky, even when it comes to gifts for other people."

"Meaning," the old man mused, his eyes scanning the shop's interior. "You mentioned he's a driver, right?" I nodded in confirmation. "How about something that combines his love for racing with a touch of nostalgia?"

I furrowed my brows, intrigued by his suggestion. "What do you suggest?"

The old man's eyes gleamed with excitement as he led me toward a large leather album, slightly bigger than A3 paper, resting on a wooden display stand. "I was a big motorsport fan back in the day," he began, his voice carrying the weight of cherished memories. "I even traveled to America to watch some good old NASCAR races. Fortunately, I had the opportunity to meet many drivers and collected a few things people find valuable now."

With his permission, I opened the album to reveal a treasure trove of race posters, each one meticulously preserved and adorned with signatures from drivers and team owners. The pages were filled with a rich tapestry of racing history from various series.

"Oh, are these race posters?" I asked in awe.

The old man nodded proudly. "They are all signed, by drivers and team owners, from a variety of racing series. Perhaps a poster from Le Mans from his birth year? Or... what does he drive? What does he enjoy?"

"Formula 1," I replied. And then I looked up to him. "Maybe a poster from the Spanish Grand Prix of '94, if it's available?"

The old man's eyes sparkled with recognition. "Ah, the Spanish Grand Prix of '94. That was a memorable one. I think it’s in there somewhere."

As I stepped out of the shop, the poster and a frame we picked after were inside a carton box, with a lot of tape around it. It would survive the flight, I hoped. I couldn't help but notice how picturesque Berlin looked that afternoon. The sun cast a warm golden hue on the architecture, turning even the most ordinary scenes into works of art. I adjusted my sunglasses, taking in the sights and sounds of the bustling city. Cobblestone streets wound through neighbourhoods that seemed to have their own stories to tell.

With each step, I felt a little more grounded, the rhythm of my strides syncing with the beat of the city. People passed by, their conversations forming a melodic backdrop. Laughter spilt out from sidewalk cafes, and the aroma of various cuisines filled the air.

Eva: “weird to think that i once thought germans were the prettiest europeans”

Marjorie: “a loooot of layers to debunk there”

Eva: “they were mostly football players and sebastian vettel. not that many layers.”

Marjorie: “vettel? wow, that’s soooo surprising” Marjorie: ”no one would EVER guess your taste in men”

Eva: “yeah? what’s my taste in men then?”

Marjorie: “former red bull athletes that raced/race for ferrari?” Marjorie: ”duh”

Eva: “you’re so annoying”

Marjorie: “did you get the gift?”

Eva: “yes”

Marjorie: “what did you get?”

Eva: “ill show you later”

Marjorie: “ok, now you can stop overthinking and focus on the handsome spaniard waiting for you and the amazing birthday sex he's in for”

Eva: "omg” Eva: "can’t believe you’re a MOM”

Helping Amanda at the store helped me more than I wanted to admit. I liked being busy. I needed to be busy. Spreadsheets and checklists were the perfect escape from the stress accumulating in my mind. I needed that, the sense of being in control. And if I felt like I was not totally controlling my career, still being discussed online, at least I could be in control of numbers and store openings.

"Last project as a team?" Amanda's voice reached me, her back turned as she meticulously arranged fake flowers in a jar. "I finally saw your interview last night. Full dedication to racing, starting next year."

I leaned against an unopened box, half my size, my fingers absentmindedly tracing patterns on the cardboard's surface. "Yeah, I've mentioned this to you before.” I took a break, using the seconds to take a breath. “I mean, I gave you like 70% of my clients."

She finally turned around, a plastic sunflower hanging from her fingers. "Yeah. I know. But I gotta admit, I half-expected you to stick around. Keep a client or two... Just in case."

A bead of sweat trickled down my back, my palms slightly sweaty as I wiped them against the cool fabric of my shorts.

"To be honest," I began, my gaze meeting hers. "No, I'm not entirely sure. But I don't think I ever will be. It just feels like something I need to do, you know? Stop doubting and take the leap."

She continued to observe me, her expression thoughtful. "And if it goes wrong?"

"Then I start over, just like I did a few years ago.” I settled onto an ottoman chair, taking a deep breath and picking my bottle of water from the side table. “Difference is: I have my own resources now. I have money. My money. I can travel, I can afford to try. I won't be relying on anyone else, this time."

"At all?" Her question carried a weight that made me frown. "I've seen the news. I've seen Twitter."

I rolled my eyes. "Ah, Twitter."

Her gaze remained steady on mine, unwavering. "So, are you two together or not?"

I sighed, a mixture of frustration and exasperation bubbling up. "Amanda, for once, I want to be my own person. To pursue my own dreams on my own terms." Stepping forward, I brushed my hands on my shorts, attempting to get rid of the sweat. "He's my friend, a really good one. But we’re talking work, not personal life."

She persisted, her tone unwavering. "Let's delve into the personal, then."

Turning away, I picked up a couple of the already empty cardboard boxes. "Honestly, I'd prefer if we didn't," I mumbled, carrying them towards the trash.

After ensuring Amanda wouldn't spontaneously combust from store-opening nerves, and after hearing her apologies for the intrusion, I bid farewell to Berlin. Every checklist and spreadsheet was printed and laminated, ready to be used for the inauguration. The gift boxes for the guests were carefully arranged on the counter and all the frames and backdrops for photos were set.

The airport buzzed with its customary end-of-August throng, yet, the line at security wasn’t so long.

As I dumped my belongings into the tray, the soft clinking of metal snagged my focus. My gaze drifted down, catching the glint of a tiny golden steering wheel illuminated by the airport's harsh lights.

A soft chuckle escaped my lips, swallowed by the surrounding crowd.

I’d been carrying it around since I’d left the track, half-drunk and drenched in champagne. I recalled being wearied by the day's events, too tipsy to recall the basics of Japanese and to walk in a straight line. I also remembered stumbling upon a souvenir stand near the track, my eyes fixating on those sparkling keychains. They had looked so delicate and golden, so artfully crafted that one might mistake them for actual gold if not for the 3000 yen price tag dangling from them—just shy of 20€.

Purchasing it had stirred up memories of our old tradition, those times when we'd strive to find the quirkiest gifts for each other. Snowglobes, magnets, postcards—each trinket carrying memories of the places we'd visited without each other.

"have fun at your dinner, soon to be birthday boy," I sent him a text as I settled into one of the seats by my gate.

Upon landing, a mirror selfie greeted me. There he was—a playful rogue, fresh out of the shower and sporting nothing but a strategically draped towel around his waist. A pout adorned his lips.

And as the caption: “i’ll try, but i’m feeling pretty lonely out here”

A one-shoulder black top draped over my frame, the asymmetrical neckline cutting the line of my chest. The wide linen pants I wore flowed gracefully with each of my steps, their relaxed fit exuding a laid-back vibe. My pants were cinched at the waist with a black leather belt, adding a subtle touch of edginess to the outfit. I reapplied my make-up in the Uber, after dropping my suitcases and the frame at the hotel lobby. Rio had arranged everything—a schedule so meticulously programmed that I couldn’t believe it was programmed by him.

I soon found myself standing outside the restaurant, my phone in hand as I dialled his number. Amsterdam was bursting with fans and tourists, nothing out of the ordinary for a night at the end of August, nearing the Grand Prix. Lost while observing the small crowds tracing the streets, I only noticed my brother’s familiar grin when he was close enough to trap me in a hug.

"Eva!" he held all the pride of the world in that hug.

"Hi," I laughed lightly. "Hey! I kinda need to breathe, you know?"

He released me with a sheepish grin, eyes sparkling with affection. He kissed my cheek before taking a step back. "Sorry, I’ve been saving this hug for a while now. And wow… The lipstick. Suits you.”

I put my hand on his chest, over the buttons of his dark green polo. “You're not looking too shabby yourself.”

His laughter echoed, genuine and carefree, as he linked his arm with mine. “Well, I do try to keep up appearances once or twice a year.”

“For birthdays and Christmas?”

“Yeah. Something like it.”

We strolled into the restaurant together. The anticipation of the evening hung in the air, tugging in my belly. God, what’s this feeling?

“What did you tell them?”

“Oh, you know—” Rio scratched the back of his neck. “Something about needing to take a call?”

I burst into laughter. "You literally managed to secretly arrange a flight and extra hotel room but couldn't come up with a more believable excuse for this?"

Rio joined in my laughter. "Hey, it worked! No one asked too many questions."

"Fair enough. Where’s the table?”

“At the back,” he pointed at an arch in the brick wall of the restaurant. “Have you spoken to Dad?”

“Not tonight, Rio,” I replied, pausing for a moment and turning slightly to face him. “Can we talk about all that tomorrow? It’s been a lot. I just want to eat something decent, rather, drink something decent and have a good time.”

He kissed my cheek. “Sure. I’m proud of you. Just remember that.”

Carlos was seated facing the archway, and my gaze was drawn to him the instant Rio and I stepped through it. It took Carlos a brief moment longer to register our presence. He was engrossed in conversation, his brows knit together as he spoke animatedly, his hands dancing with fervour as he talked. The room seemed to grow silent as my eyes focused on him. Then, as if pulled by an invisible force, his gaze met mine.

And the world went completely silent.

His lips curved into a smile that transformed his features, smoothing away any tension. He seemed to be filled with light and I felt so weightless, I felt I could have floated through the air like a feather—it wasn't the sensation of falling for him; or falling for each other, but rather the exhilarating feeling of ascending together, drawn irresistibly toward each other's orbit.

And I felt at ease.

Rio playfully tugged at my arm, drawing me further into the restaurant. "He's so ridiculously in love," he teased with a knowing grin, watching his best friend, already getting up from his chair.

A wistful smile touched my lips, my heart echoing with silent questions. The words hung unspoken in the air, a gentle whisper carried by the currents of emotion that flowed between us.

It was warm and cold at the same time. Too much happening and nothing at all.

“Fuck off,” I whispered. My brother just laughed.

My steps quickened with each heartbeat, a subtle urgency pushing me forward, almost outpacing my brother’s pace. I had to consciously force myself to walk slowly and not betray my haste to reach the table. All the way, my eyes didn’t leave Carlos, already on his feet, his hand resting casually on the back of his char. Effortless attire—whitewashed jeans and a simple T-shirt. His hair was a charming mess, tempting me to run my fingers through the tousled strands.

Around the table, faces were beginning to light up with recognition and surprise, the gathering of friends and acquaintances slowly rising to greet us. I waved at them, “Hi! Good night,” and a soft giggle bubbled from my lips as I caught the shared amusement on Carlos' friends' faces.

“Hey,” Carlos said.

As he leaned in to press a warm kiss to my cheek, the familiarity of his touch ignited a sense of comfort. He smelled nice. His hands found their way around me, wrapping me in a hug that felt both familiar and intoxicatingly new. I reciprocated the embrace, savouring the closeness while maintaining an air of casualness as if this were an ordinary occurrence.

“You’re here.” He whispered, the small sound cutting through the noise echoing in the room.

“I am,” I murmured softly, my voice carrying a warmth that was reserved for him alone. “Hi.”

“Hi.” Carlos chuckled, his breath tickling my ear as he pulled away. "What are you doing here? You must be exhausted."

"Just a little jet-lagged," I admitted with a sheepish smile, the exhaustion momentarily forgotten in his presence. “Nothing a good night of sleep and some Red Bull tomorrow won’t solve.”

"Red Bull, huh? Giving the opponents some business, are we?" Caco playfully remarked, dragging his chair to the side, to create space to add another seat to the table.

I chuckled, playing along. "Well, a little cross-team support never hurt anyone, right?"

"Alright, everyone," Rio's voice cut through our moment; by his side, two waitresses, one of them carrying a chair and the other one a set of plates and a glass. "We need another seat here, please." He motioned to the place between his and Carlos’ seats. “And bring back the menu, please, so she can pick something to eat.”

“Thank you,” I whispered, short moments after, taking my seat. “And I’ll just have some carbonara. No need for the menu.”

“Welcome back, Eva,” Caco said, before picking up the bottle of wine and filling my glass. “We missed you around here.”

The night was alive with energy, laughter, and the warmth of connection.

It felt nice to be back in the midst of a Team 55 dinner, just like it used to happen years ago when Carlos still wore yellow or orange and we were too blind to actually read through the lines. The familiarity of faces, the shared jokes and the easy camaraderie were a comforting reminder of the bonds that had formed over time, and that he was in good hands those last years.

It had been three years since the last Grand Prix I attended by Carlos' side. He was a man, now. A Grand Prix race winner. A Ferrari driver. He wore red, burning red. The Italian anthem had played for him. Not many had that honour.

The low hum of conversation blended seamlessly with the clinking of glasses and the occasional bursts of laughter. I let myself observe the group, the connection between them all, the aura around the table. It was like stepping into the past and finding home, once again.

As the clock neared midnight, Rio leaned in with a sly smile. "I think it's time for some champagne, don't you think?"

“Oh, no, I—We have work tomorrow,” Carlos’ voice was interrupted by a chorus of boos that echoed around the table. From the archway, a waitress appeared with a tray of mini burgers adorned with candles in her hands. “Oh, you didn’t!”

His laughter blended perfectly with the melody of “Happy Birthday” being echoed from everyone in the room, not only from our table but from the other ones, too. I focused my eyes on him, only to find out he was already looking at me, grin wide and eyes glistening.

“Mate, you’re getting old!” Rupert exclaimed before hugging him. “Speech!!" He called out, his strong British accent ringing through the cheers and applause, raising his glass and prompting others to follow suit.

“No, no!” Carlos shook his head, a playful protest on his lips, as the chant grew in volume. "Oh, come on, guys."

“Stop being a chicken, mate. Come on,” my brother whispered.

With a good-natured sigh, Carlos finally stood up, a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. He surveyed the faces around the table, and then around the room, his gaze lingering on each person before settling on me, his eyes warm and sincere.

"Alright, alright," he began, moving his hands in an attempt to hush the commotion around him. "Well, uh… Another one, right? 28!” The room grew quiet, the attention of every person fixed on Carlos as he spoke from the heart. One of the waiters passed him a flute filled with champagne. He took it in his hands and nodded, before whispering a thank you. "Birthdays have always been a time of reflection for me. A time to look back on the journey, the ups and downs and whatnot, and, of course, the people who have been by my side through it all. These guys right here.” He pointed to the table with the flute. “And I can honestly say that I am so incredibly lucky to have each and every one of you with me." He raised his glass and everyone mirrored his gesture, a sense of camaraderie filling the air. "To the team, to friendship, and to the memories we've created and the ones we're yet to make."

As the glasses clinked together in a toast, the atmosphere was charged with emotion and shared celebration. Carlos took a moment to catch my gaze, a twinkle in his eyes as he added, "And to Eva, who has been a constant source of support and inspiration. Here's to you, to your podium at WEC, and to many more victories."

I felt my cheeks burning and I tried to conceal my smile by having a sip of the champagne.

“To Eva!” My brother exclaimed, his glass raised in the air, prompting the others to follow.

“To Eva!” The room chanted, as Carlos approached me and planted a kiss on my cheek.

“I’m so proud of you.” He whispered.

“I hate you,” I whispered. “Thank you.”

The combination of jetlag, wine, champagne and the events of the night had left me feeling simultaneously exhilarated and tired. As we walked back, the city lights casting a soft glow around us, I leaned into Carlos, my head resting against his shoulder. He wrapped an arm around me.

“Tired?” he inquired, his voice a gentle caress against the night breeze.

I nodded against his shoulder, my gaze trailing to the figures of our friends walking ahead of us. “And a bit tipsy, I think. The day just went by so quickly.”

A soft chuckle escaped him, his fingers brushing against my arm in a soothing gesture. With a warmth that seeped into my skin, he said, “We’re almost there. 10 minutes and you'll be in bed.”

“No rush, really. I still need to give you your gift and get ready for bed. Lot more than 10 minutes.”

“Okay, then…” He pondered. I looked up, noticing the way his brow furrowed playfully. A small chuckle left my lips. “Let’s say… 40, then.”

“Ugh,” I unfed, wrapping my arm around his waist, under his leather jacket. “That’s a lot of time for someone who slept like… 5 hours today.”

“You needed to rest,” his voice had that tone of concern I was not yet quite used to hearing. “Rest. Not add another fight to the list.”

“And I will rest this weekend. Just hope your driver’s room has a good couch.”

His laughter resonated in the air, the sound a welcome companion in the quiet of the night. “The best in the Ferrari hospitality.”

“I’m in good hands, then.”

We walked in silence for a little while, casually observing the surroundings. Everyone was just too busy living their lives to notice or to care he was there. It was a 5-minute walk from the restaurant to the hotel, our friends had already disappeared from view when we entered through a side door, free from the small crowd that could potentially be waiting at the main entrance.

“How was Japan?” He asked when we were racing the elevators.

I smiled, my head turning from the closed doors to his face. “Wild.” The memories of the race weekend flooded my thoughts. A chuckle escaped me as I recalled some of them. “Insane, really… I mean... The Challenge was great, and everything. But this was serious, you know? Like… WEC is serious. People saw me there. Saw what I did, you know?” He nodded, a smile playing on his lips. “And this might sound super cocky, but… it was amazing.”

“Oh, you bet the world saw you. Your name rang in the paddock the whole day. And that interview you did with Anderson?”

“What about it?”

“I’m just jealous. I never looked that good on camera,” he teased, his eyes glinting with playful mischief. I laughed and followed the ping of the elevator, that now opened its doors to us. With his back turned to me, while he pressed one of the buttons, he questioned, “Am I one of those people?” Then, he turned back to me, a smug smile in his mouth. “The ones you mentioned. Do I inspire you?”

The corner of my lips lifted in a playful grin. “Do you really need to ask?" I watched as he shrugged, a nonchalant expression on his face. I rolled my eyes, “Well, you know… every time I see your face on TV, I think, ‘Wow, I have to learn something from that guy’.”

His laughter rang out, a sound that was as comforting as it was infectious. “That’s it? My handsome face is just a reminder to work harder?”

I matched his playful tone. “Well, either that or the fear of becoming the least interesting person on TV.” As he leaned against the wall, his body language inviting me closer, I complied without hesitation. I stepped into his space, still at a distance. ”I’ll let you pick whichever makes you feel better.”

He rolled his eyes before his gaze locked onto mine, a whole different haze around those orbs. The quiet hum of the elevator seemed to fade into the background, leaving only the two of us in our own world. His index finger hooked on the belt hoop of my pants, a subtle gesture that pulled me toward him. His voice, soft yet filled with longing, wrapped around me like a velvet ribbon.

“I miss you,” he confessed. “I was dying for a moment alone with you.”

“I’m all yours, now.”

His lopsided grin transformed into a mischievous smirk as he closed the distance between us. A pair of tender, delicate lips met mine, and I could feel the hint of his smile as I melted into his embrace, a contented sigh escaping my lips.

I lost myself in him, in the touch of his hands touching me everywhere, reclaiming my body and pressing me against him. The urgency grew. My fingers instinctively curled around the leather of his jacket, pulling him closer with a determined grip. His hands ventured to my lower back, drawing me nearer. We could have transcended into another dimension.

As the elevator doors finally opened on his floor, we reluctantly pulled away from each other, our lips lingering for a moment before breaking apart. The hunger in his gaze mirrored my own. With a silent understanding, we rushed through the hallway—stupid teenagers in a rom-com.

I felt the weight of the door click shut behind us as he pushed me against it, his lips already on my neck. Our perfumes mixed together, a scent already familiar, yet to which I had no resistance. I felt drunk on it. His hands left my waist to pull my top down and reveal my bare skin beneath. There was urgency in his touch, in his eyes, in the way he exhaled when he took a step back and took me in.

Under his eyes, goosebumps ran across my chest. Thingles shot up from my nipples.

Carlos ran his thumb over one of them, eyes studying the rose buds, his tongue peering between his lips. “No bra?” He teased, his eyes glinting.

“Though I might save us some time,” I whispered back.

“I like the way you think,” he replied with a low growl. The warmth of his breath touched my skin, making me shiver uncontrollably before his lips reached my breast.

To that, I would never get used. The velvet touch of his tongue, the particular way his lips seem to perfectly fit each crevice of my body. My hands came up to his hair, tangling myself in the silky locks as he suckled on my nipple, his tongue flicking over the hardened peak. I gasped, my head falling backwards.

Electricity shot through my body, pooling between my legs.

“I want to do something for you, today," I said.

He cocked an eyebrow at me, his eyes darkening with desire. "What?" The husky timbre of his voice sent a chill down my spine, as he undid the belt of my pants. From then, to the moment they fell on the floor, was a couple of seconds.

I descended from my heels and guided him to bed, where he sat at the edge. Then sat down, gently, on his lap, my legs spreading naturally. Slightly hesitating, he reached out, and glided his palm over my back and my ass, before tracing a path down the back of my thighs. With a more urgent touch, his fingertips burning in curiosity and anticipation, he continued until his hand reached the back of my knees and with a strong motion, pulled me nearer to him. Fuck. I quivered in his lap, a broken moan escaping my lips.

He smiled. "You like that?"

I nodded, biting my lip as I felt the heat in his eyes. Tentatively, I placed my hands on his shoulders and moved again, shamelessly grinding against his jeans. Again, a low, husky moan left my mouth and his fingers dug into my ass. He was completely dressed and I was soaking through my panties.

Cupping my face in his hands, he brought his mouth back to mine. Fierce and wet. Possessive and savage. I moaned against his mouth as his hands came up to my breasts, kneading them as I rode him harder. His touch was overwhelming, and I could feel myself getting close to the edge.

"No. Wait. I—” My hand rested on his chest. “You’re making me lose focus."

My chin was locked between his fingers, as he held my face close.

"Hm?" He groaned against my mouth. "On what, baby?"

"On you," I said, between breaths, my voice almost breaking. I forced myself to stop moving, even when I felt every inch of my body under a spell. My clit was throbbing, crying for attention. "Your shirt," I commanded, and in seconds, it was flying to the floor.

The cool floor stimulated my heated skin, as I knelt in front of him. My eyes couldn't leave his face—the strands falling over his forehead, his slightly flushed cheeks, his swollen lips. I reached out, my fingers deftly working on his belt buckle, my every movement deliberate and tantalizing. Dark orbs stared at me from behind sleep-tousled eyes, desire taking them whole. Unzipping him, I let the jeans fall to his feet before touching him over his white Calvin Kleins. I could feel my mouth watering at the imprint of his erection on the fabric.

Looking up again, there was a grin on his lips.

His thumb gently traced the contour of my bottom lip, urging it to part. Without hesitation, I complied, welcoming his finger into my mouth. My lips closed around it, gently sucking as my hands explored him through the fabric of his boxers. His response was immediate; he bit his lower lip, a guttural groan escaping as I slid the elastic waistband down, releasing him into the open.

Carlos pulled himself up in bed, pulling off his boxers on his way. His eyes wandered briefly to a spot just beyond me, a mischievous smile playing on his lips.

"Panties off, baby," he commanded. With ease, he positioned himself at the centre of the bed, his legs parted invitingly.

Glancing swiftly behind me, my eyes landed on a mirror. Without hesitation, I followed his command, sliding my panties down, ensuring my reflection in the mirror granted him the view he deserved. Then, I gracefully crawled towards him, positioning myself between his legs with my knees slightly apart, my ass elevated in the air.

His cock rested against my lips. I moved in, sucking gently, as I looked up. He didn’t know where to look: his eyes flickered from the mirror down to my face to the mirror again. I moved my tongue up and down his shaft and then he finally looked away from the mirror and at me.

"You're beautiful," he breathed, his voice low and throaty. I blinked up at him, confused by his words. "So beautiful," he repeated. "The way you're looking at me, the way you're sucking me off. It's fucking beautiful."

I blushed, feeling shy and exposed under his gaze. I loved the way he looked at me, with such certainty and admiration. I loved that he saw me as something beautiful. Something worth saving. I parted my lips and slid my mouth around his shaft then pulled back, taking him as slowly as I could. He tilted his head and cried out, the vibration of his voice sending a shock of heat into my core.

I smiled up at him as I shifted, angling him so he was hitting the back of my throat.

"You like this?" He asked, a grin spreading across his face. I nodded, my head moving faster. "You're going to make me come in your mouth, aren't you?" I nodded again, my eyes locked onto his. His voice was low and commanding, his grip tight in my hair. I moaned around him, pleasure radiating through me as I felt him pulsating in my mouth.

My tights moved in the air, my pussy pulsating, crying for attention.

"Baby," he called. I looked up. "Touch yourself. But don't stop. You're doing so well."

I couldn't focus on anything else but what he was telling me to do. I reached down, feeling my wetness seep through my fingers. A moan slipped past my lips as I started stroking myself, faster and faster. My clit was throbbing, begging for attention. I glanced at Carlos, watching him struggle to keep control. He looked so strained, his body tense, his torso glistening with tiny droplets of sweat. He looked so fucking good.

"You're going to make me come, baby." He groaned, thrusting deeper into my mouth. I increased the speed of my movements, my head bobbing up and down on his shaft. I could feel him getting closer, the pulse in his cock growing faster and faster.

He came quickly, his cum filling my mouth and down my throat. I swallowed, my stomach muscles contracting as I drank down every last drop. He released my hair and lay in bed, his breathing erratic. "Come here."

"He—Where?"

"Here," he said like it was obvious. "Sit on my face."

For a second, I hesitated. But then he looked at me, his eyebrow pointing up, his tongue wandering between his lips and God, how, better, why would I say no? I complied, sinking down on top of him. His hands came up to my ass, spreading me open as he took my aching pussy into his mouth. And that was another thing I could never get used to. I gasped, my hands coming down to grip his hair, now tousled and sweaty. His tongue was wet and velvety as it flicked over my clit. I ground against him, my breathing becoming ragged.

"Come for me, baby," he murmured. He was a starved man. I was his precious meal. And how good it felt to me worshipped like that. "Come on my fucking tongue."

My body shook as I came hard, my pussy clenching tightly around his tongue. He kept going, licking and sucking until I was crying out in sheer ecstasy, my hands gripping the headrest, my knuckles turning white as the sensations overwhelmed me.

I lay sprawled on the bed, my legs still jerking, tingling with aftershocks of delight, my naked form glistening with a light sheen of sweat, utterly spent and exhilarated.

Carlos approached me, his nose touching mine, making me smile. “You were so good,” he whispered just before he pressed a slow, tender kiss against my lips. My mouth parted in anticipation of his, like always. My eyes drifted closed as I kissed him back.

“Happy birthday,” I said with drunken delight.

A small humm from him was the only response I got until I felt his hands pulling me to him, holding me close to his chest. A kiss on the forehead followed that, then another, this time on the top of my head.

His hands were warm where they trailed down my back.

And then I drifted to sleep.

There was a strange weight over my belly.

A warm stream of air against my skin, rhythmically kissing my ribs. The room was dark and warm, and my head hurt. A few morning sun rays seeped through the binds, wrapping the room in a warm yet slow yellow tint. I tried to move my leg, but it was wrapped in another body. And a smile emerged on my lips.

Slowly, I stretched my hand, the touch of his hair sending shivers down my spine. Heat flushed through me when my sleepy gaze fell on him. His back rose up in perfect curves, taut muscles rolling along his spine with every breath, like waves coming ashore. My tan glowed under his brown hair, which fell in soft strands against my chest. The curve of his torso disappeared at his waist, revealing a small hollow where he had curled up against me as if he belonged there—as if that moment was what life was all about.

Hearts beating so slowly.

A silence so full of a promise of peace and security in the uncertainty.

The previous days had been so full, so messy, so… scary.

And I was never a fan of sleeping like this, especially in the summer, but if it meant to wake up to that view, my mind could change.

I blinked awake, feeling disoriented and confused. Memories from last night swirled around in my head, jumbled and hazy, until my mind slowly pieced together what happened. A long dinner, a lot of wine. Messy kisses on the elevator, even messier in bed. Slowly, the memories coalesced into a coherent whole, and I realized that I was in Carlos' hotel room, our bodies naked and intertwined. I could feel the sheets beneath me, the weight of his body against me, the scent of sex and him, in an intoxicating mixture, pulling me back to sleep.

Silence stretched around.

The sound of his breath evened out, deep asleep.

It was hot, and the logical part of my mind urged me to get up, take a shower and remind Carlos of his commitments, but against reason, I resisted the urge. Instead, I lay there, gently tracing the short waves of his hair and basking in the sight of him peacefully sleeping on my chest.

And perhaps that is what life is all about, after all.

Our intimacy reverberated in the depths of that silence that didn’t need to be fulfilled. Felt right. The weight of his body shifted, relieving mine from the warmth and when my eyes met his, he was looking up at me, a soft lazy curve on his lips.

“You’re awake,” he murmured at some point, his voice barely audible.

“I am.”

Carlos leaned in, and our lips met in a slow, languid kiss. Each brush of our lips, a moment of pure vulnerability and adoration. The brush of his fingers on my cheeks, our legs intertwined, our bodies finding comfort against each other. Wafting through the atmosphere, the deep understanding that there was no better place we could be.

“You have to go get ready.”

Carlos hummed against my jawline, his fingers tracing lazy circles on my bare skin. "I set an alarm," he murmured, his warm breath sending shivers down my spine. “Why you’re up so early? It’s like…” He stretched his arm to check the time on the nightstand. “6.30.”

“Time doesn’t make sense,” I hummed, a tired smile on my face. He chuckled softy. My fingers danced across his skin, the warmth and softness of it inviting my touch. They came to a rest at the nape of his neck, where delicate strands of hair brushed against my fingertips, silently urging me to thread them between my fingers. “And someone was crushing me.”

Carlos nuzzled closer, a playful smile gracing his lips. "I plead innocent. It's not my fault if you turned out to be irresistibly cuddly."

Feigning mock indignation, I swatted his arm gently. “Excuse me? Turned out? ”

His laughter bubbled forth, warm and rich, filling the room with its infectious energy. He then rolled to his side, and as my eyes fell on his barely disturbed pillow, I pondered whether we had drifted off like that or if he had moved during the night. Adjusting my position, I turned to face him.

“It’s quite nice to wake up like this, you know?” I admitted with a soft smile, my gaze locked onto his. Carlos’ chuckle danced in the air, playful and affectionate.

“Now… Excuse me! Actually nice? Were you doubting it?” he teased, a playful glint in his eyes that mirrored the lightness of our banter. “Have you seen me?”

“Oh, yes. I have.”

“So, why is it actually nice?”

“Because I thought it would be different. That I wouldn’t be so comfortable to be naked in bed with you. I mean, I saw you eat worms as a child—” A giggle left my lips. “And now I let those same lips kiss me.”

“Oh, baby, you let them do so much more. I can still taste you,” he said with a smirk, his hand travelling down to my ass and pushing me to him.

A soft laughter escaped my lips, a mixture of surprise and amusement. Carlos' playful response was exactly what I had come to expect from him. "Oh, now we're getting cheeky, are we?"

His smirk deepened, his fingers tracing a teasing pattern along the back of my thigh. My leg was now wrapped around his. "Well, you know me."

I shifted closer to him, my fingers tracing lazy circles on his chest. "You're incorrigible."

The air between us was light, infused with a sense of ease that came so naturally when we were together. It was moments like these that I cherished the most—the unfiltered exchanges, the unspoken understanding, the unbreakable connection. His fingers traced patterns in my skin, mine stood still in his chest, the beating of his heart under my digits—a language of touch and glances that we had grown accustomed to without even noticing. The warmth of his body against mine, the intimacy of our shared space—it all felt so right, so beautifully intimate.

Carlos propped himself up on his elbow, his gaze tender yet searching. "You know, for what it's worth,” he began.

“Yes?”

“Waking up next to you feels... right," he admitted, his tone softening, his gaze holding mine. And then, as a contemplative expression crossed his features, he shifted his gaze to the window. "You know, I never expected this,” his voice tinged with a mixture of wonder and vulnerability. "I never thought we would ever fall on the same page. Either because I thought I didn’t deserve to be seen this way by you or because… I don’t know. I was so afraid of fucking up and losing you…"

His words settled like a gentle wave, each syllable a touch on my soul. The rawness in his voice stirred something within me, a connection that seemed to reach beyond words. His touch was warm on my skin, his words so low and his voice so rough, the timbre a caress that sorted through the depths of my emotions. I laid back in bed, my hands resting over my belly, in the spot where he had been asleep moments before. It was still warm.

"I couldn’t stop thinking about losing you. Until I did. And then I couldn’t stop dreaming about having you back. And then I saw you in the garage, at Mugello, and… it all came back, you know?” His eyes dropped to my chest, and then to my eyes. “The fear of letting you go," he confessed softly, his gaze unwavering.

The vulnerability in his words was a mirror to my own heart, an echo of the fears and doubts that had once haunted both of us. It almost felt too much.

"But then… The second you allowed me to get close enough, to look at you and truly see you…” He stretched his fingers and let his hand find the skin of my chest. Over my stern, he let his index wander, from my neck to my hands. “To feel you… This is not about losing. Is it?”

“It is not,” I replied, a small smile curving my lips.

His hand wandered to my side, his thumb tracing a gentle path over my breast. I looked down, admiring the way my body reacted to him—eager shivers, a symphony of sensations awakening in its trail. With every touch, it felt like being discovered anew. Each time he touched me, it felt like being touched for the very first time all over again.

“You have no idea how much I understand that,” I murmured, lifting my head from the pillow, my lips seeking his. He met me halfway, his head tilting to close the distance between us.

So mellow and slow. Warm and comforting. And lazy. Our kisses unfolded in unhurried movements, a languid exploration of each other's emotions. Time seemed to stretch and bend, because in that space, within the circle of his arms, we could afford to be lazy. Outside, the world was put on hold.

Carlos moved to hover over me, his frame settling in between my legs, shielding me from the sunlight rays seeping through the curtains. It was all him. And the lines of his stupidly handsome body and face, enhanced by the light hitting his back.

“I have a question,” I said, looking up at him.

The corner of his lips tugged up in a smirk, as he lowered himself to kiss my chin. “Not now, baby.”

“Yes, now, baby.”

He looked up. The lines of his face were disguised in the dark room. “I really would like to start this day inside you.” He ran his hand on my side, stopping at the back of my leg and guiding it around his waist. “Can we do that?”

“But that won’t answer my question.”

“That will make me very very very happy.” He kissed my chin, again. And then my cheek, my jaw, just below my ear. I exhaled, a stupid smile on my lips. Yeah, I had no chance against his tactics. My fingers moved on his biceps, tautening under my touch as he pressed his waist against me. “Can you feel how happy you make me?” he asked, his voice low and velvet smooth.

"Hmhm," I acknowledged. And he did it again, eyes locked on mine. A small moan escaped between my pressed lips and he chuckled, amused.

I shut my eyes as he moved his hips again, this time sliding against my slick folds. So close, yet so agonizing far. I could feel my own desire and the knowledge of it made my blood boil in my veins. I wanted him more than anything, and my body needed him just the same.

"Carlos," I begged, arching my back as he teased me mercilessly. "Please."

He chuckled softly, pushing himself up a little so that his lips could find mine. "Please what?" he asked, his voice a soft tease.

Make love to me. The words erupted from a very hidden corner of my mind, still lost in sleep and trapped in the fabric of dreams.

"Please," I repeated, this time a little louder. "I need you."

"I can see that," he replied, his voice low and serious. I opened my eyes to find him looking down, guiding his cock with one hand and using the other to move some strands of hair away from his face. "How are you so wet already, baby?"

How couldn’t I be?

I couldn't answer. All I could do was whimper as he teased me again, his tip sliding all the way through my slit, poking the entrance.

"You like being teased, don't you?" he asked, his voice low and sinful. "You like it so much that it’s a shame I can’t spend the whole day making you go crazy with it."

"Yes," I gasped, arching my back to get closer to him. He circled the entrance and I pressed my feet to the mattress, my head going back to the pillow as my body ached for him. "Please, Carlos."

"Okay, baby. I'm here," he said lowly, his voice a throaty whisper. He kissed me again, slowly but deeply. His tongue brushed against mine, my lips trapped between his teeth. "I'll make love to you."

The words were like a balm to my achy heart, a balm that soothed and healed. Carlos eased himself in slowly, a slow, torturous movement that made my entire body cry for him. And then out. Even more slowly. My hands moved to his shoulders, and then to his hair, urging him back. And when he was finally inside me again, I let out a long, trembling breath.

The slick, wet heat of us was heaven. His movements were slow and deliberate, a delicious torture that made me writhe uncontrollably beneath him.

"Austria," he breathed, his head hovering above mine as he moved his hips against me, burying himself deeper inside. I opened my eyes, meeting his intense gaze. "That's what made me go to Mugello."

A moan escaped my lips as he pushed even further, my back arching in response to the pleasure coursing through me. His eyes, filled with a burning desire, remained locked onto mine. "How? Why?" I managed to ask, my voice trembling with need.

"The fire," he confessed, his movements deliberate and sensual. His fingers slid through mine, our hands intertwining as he raised them above my head and thrust into me once more, the sensation more intense than before. "I didn't think about dying or getting hurt. All I could think about was you.” He moaned lowly, a fucking melody in my ears. “Your voice in my head."

I furrowed my brow, his words slowly registering in my desire-clouded mind. Sensations of pleasure and love pulsed through me as he continued to move, his gaze never leaving mine. He was taking his time, savouring every moment of our connection.

“Me?”

His grip on my fingers got stronger. “You.”

And then, in my cloudy mind, in the midst of all things I was feeling and desiring, the endless goodbyes we exchanged. His cologne mixed with rubber and oil, the sound of engines and rattle guns. The hugs at the airport, at home, before leaving and after arriving.

"Go race but don't die in there," I whispered, the words escaping my lips like a fervent prayer. He cracked a small, affectionate smile.

"Exactly that," he murmured against my lips. "And then, for a fraction of a second, I thought of dying. And how I wouldn't see you ever again."

I swallowed hard, the ache in my chest intensifying. My feelings seemed bigger than myself.

"I want to be with you."

Carlos's face softened at my words. "I want that, too, baby," he whispered, his voice full of love and tenderness, his chest pressing against mine as he caught my lips in a slow kiss, burying himself inside me once more.

And then he was moving faster, harder, and I was lost, lost in the waves of pleasure crashing over me and the idea of how I had found home. I was falling. No safety net, yet the wind in my face was greater than any safety I had ever known.

-

Minutes after climax, both of us still lost in post-sex bliss and in each other, Carlos’ alarm rang on the nightstand. The room was now more brightly lit, but our bodies were still languid and sated, lost in the cocoon of our intimate connection. I couldn't help but roll my eyes at the strident symphony of the alarm.

"Think I've got time for a quick nap?" I inquired with a playful raise of my eyebrow.

Carlos let out a soft chuckle as he silenced the alarm. "You can sleep while I hit the shower," he suggested, his voice still husky. "And then you'll need to get up and start getting ready, or else we’ll be late."

Feeling the weight of exhaustion creeping in, I sighed deeply while sitting up in bed. I looked around. Last night was still a confusing puzzle in my mind. And then, it all came to clarity. "Fuck!" I exclaimed, suddenly realizing, "Rio has my key card."

"Why—How did that happen?"

"What do you mean, 'how'? He did the check-in, and I just dropped my bags here at the hotel and ran to the restaurant. I—Fuck. This is on you," I threw him a pillow.

Despite my efforts, he caught it quite easily. “How is this my fault?”

“You… seduced me in the elevator,” he laughed at my words, taking a hand to his belly.

Getting up, he threw me the pillow and walked to the closet, taking a robe out of there. To be honest, half my worries disappeared while he walked naked through the room, the view being distraction enough.

"Well,” he passed me the robe. “Rio's room is just across the hall. You can pop over there, grab the key card, and sort your stuff out. I can even go for you, if you want."

My anxiety spiked at the thought of such a direct confrontation. "You want me to just knock on my brother's door and say, 'Hi, I just spent the night with your best friend. Nice night overall, but now I need my stuff to get ready.’?"

Carlos pondered the situation for a moment before responding. “Yes.”

With a sigh and a reluctant nod, I accepted the robe. I wrapped it around me, the rush of nerves tugging around at the same time. Talking to my brother about last night wasn't something I was eager to do. If there was something good about having him moving soon out of the house, was the fact that never, in my whole life, had he encountered a guy leaving my room. But there was no avoiding it now, was it?

"Alright," I muttered, summoning my resolve. "I'll go get the key card and then I’ll get ready. We meet at breakfast. But if this turns into an awkward family moment, I'm blaming you."

Carlos chuckled, his voice a soothing balm to my frazzled nerves. "I'll take full responsibility.” He picked up the second robe and dressed it. “It's not the end of the world, Eva. He’s done worse."

I gave him a wry smile, appreciating his attempt to ease my tension. "Easy for you to say," I quipped, heading towards the door. 

I mustered up the courage to walk across the hall and knock on Rio's door. Barefoot and with my hair tied in a terrible bun. It didn't take long before my brother answered, and the smirk on his face was undeniable.

"Eva, my dear sister," he said, his tone teasing. "Can’t say I wasn’t waiting for you."

"Cut it out, Fabrizio,” I moved in my feet. “Can I just get my key card?”

He feigned innocence. "Key card?”

“Come on, I need to go get ready.”

He raised an eyebrow, still grinning. "Oh, I'm sure you do.”

“Rio, I swear to God—” he interrupted me with a laugh while taking a step back and opening the door. My bags rested against his closet. I frowned. “How? Why?”

Rio's laughter rang through the room as I walked in to retrieve my bags. He leaned against the door frame, still chuckling. "Well, sis," he began, a mischievous glint in his eyes, "I figured, why waste the money on a separate room for you when I knew you'd end up there anyway? Plus, it's been ages since I had a chance to tease you properly."

I shook my head in disbelief, simultaneously amused and annoyed by his antics. "I should've known you'd pull something like this."

He gave me an unapologetic grin. "What can I say? It's in my big brother's job description to embarrass you whenever possible.”

I rolled my eyes, but a fond smile tugged at the corners of my lips. "Alright, alright," I relented, grabbing my suitcase, purse and Carlos’ gift. "I'll see you at breakfast. And for the record, Carlos is a way better roommate than you."

Rio laughed heartily, waving me off as I headed back to Carlos' room. As I closed the door behind me, I couldn't help but shake my head at my brother's antics. On the other side of the hall, the door was closed. I knocked, hoping Carlos hadn’t yet stepped into the shower.

When he opened the door, his face broke into a grin, which quickly escalated into hearty laughter. “Guess it’s a sleepover, now,” I said.

He shrugged. “Good thing we get along well.”

I'll review the chapter again in a day or two, so I'm sorry if there are a few typos, but I just finished it. Happy birthday, Carlito. Hope Monza is good for him, this weekend. post weekend edit: MONZA WAS GOOD FOR HIM, IM CRYING HAPPY TEARS taglist: @alesainz @juliantheupsidedown @dreamsarebig (i forgot to tag people when i posted the chapter because i was just so nervous about posting this (we love anxiety) so sorry, but ill try to not forget next time) thank you all for the messages and the replies and especially the reblogs! i love you all SO much. thank you so much for the support. Hope you all enjoyed the chapter. See you around. All the love, Bru 🤍

[pinkydevil16]

Kamisama Kiss

Tomoe x Land God! Reader

18+

Tomoe was seething, to think this incipit child was to be his new God? This weak, fragile human girl was believed to be worthy of Him? He scoffed as she scratched her head awkwardly, confused as the spirits explained her role.

"Look guys, i don't know what's going on if i'm honest. Some guy kissed my head and suddenly i was here. I didn't sign up to be a God but i do really need a place to stay." Tomoe could feel his aura grow dark as he stepped forward, taking a deep breath of his pipe and blowing it in her face before speaking.

"You are not worthy of Mikage's Shrine. Leave now." Y/n let out a small laugh and shook her head.

"Sorry, no can do. I'm sort of between places and Mikage? I assume offered me to stay here for a while, so as much as i would love to run out of here because you are giving off some bad energy right now i really need somewhere to stay. I just got evicted so." Tomoe turned and left in huff, swiping his claws to open a portal and disappeared before Y/n could say anything else.

"Well...i guess i can stay for a little bit then? Who was that?" Y/n mumbled, one of the spirits answered enthusiastically.

"That's Tomoe! He's a fox yokai, a very powerful one and he was Mikage's familiar before he left. He's spent the last 20 years looking after the shrine since Mikage abandoned us." Y/n contemplated for a moment as she looked around, the Shrine was in perfect condition, it was beautiful even. He must have put a lot of time and energy into making it so spotless.

"So what would happen if i accepted this whole Land God thing?" The spirits almost cried as they begged Y/n to stay, pulling at her arms as they tugged her inside.

"You would be an amazing mistress! You will help others, going through prayers and helping the earth grow! Please Miss Y/n stay." Y/n could feel how calming the Shrine was as they showed her each room, including Tomoe's which was almost bare compared to the many other rooms.

"This is all the prayers Master Tomoe has written in the last 20 years in preparation for Mikage's arrival." Y/n was stumped as she stared at the well organised piles, there must have been thousands, no tens of thousands, filed by year. The first 10 years were filled to the brim, but the last two had dwindled to only a few hundred compared to the magnitude of the beginning.

"He's been doing all of this? Alone?" The spirits nodded as Y/n walked around, her hands touching Prayers, feeling the pure devotion within them as she read some.

"Why did he not leave?" Her voice came out as a whisper as she stared at his handwriting, it was beautiful, just like the Shrine.

"He didn't want to abandon the Shrine, he hoped one day Mikage would come back. At first he was sad but then he accepted it, when he sensed your presence he was angry thinking you were Mikage." Y/n nodded along, placing down the prayer before turning to the spirits.

"Well then, if he can have that much passion perhaps i can borrow some from him and try to assist yes?" The spirits cheered as they showed Y/n all her jobs, the first being cleaning, which much to Y/n's chagrin was a long winded chore but once she finished she felt accomplished.

"What next?" Y/n worked day and night for three days before she finally dropped into her bed, having only cat naps before now she snuggled into her blanket and tried to sleep but it was no use. She knew there was more to do, how Tomoe had been doing this alone for 20 years was astounding and now she felt guilty for passing off being Land God and only concentrating on not being homeless, she'd essentially invaded his home and now he was out somewhere alone again. Forcing herself up she stretched her body, she knew what she needed to do.

"Onikiri, where is Tomoe?" The spirit appeared, with shining eyes as they explained that he was in the yokai world.

"Please take me to him."

Tomoe was lounging on a futon, the front of his Komodo barely held together as he drank sake, beautiful yokai around him as they fawned over his beauty.

"Tomoe. It's Y/n, may i enter?" Tomoe's ears spiked up as the silk draping separating him from the other yokai parted and Y/n entered, her hands sheepishly hidden behind her as she looked down.

"What do you want?" Y/n sighed as she heard the hatred in his voice but she could not find it in herself to respond harshly back, looking up she gave him a sad smile.

"I am sorry for how i acted, you have kept the Shrine in beautiful condition and i came in with such a selfish outlook. Please forgive me and return to your home." Y/n bowed, her hair covering her face as she stared at her trainers, keeping her pride pushed down.

Tomoe scoffed, letting out a mocking laugh as the other yokai laughed with him. Y/n jolted up and watched as he took another deep breath of his pipe and once again blew it in her face as he had the first day he met her.

"My my, what a pitiful human you are coming here to beg me to return because you cannot handle the work of being a God!" Y/n clenched her hands and bit her tongue as he taunted her, drinking his sake as one of the yokai women ran her hand inside his open Komodo, her long nails striking against his pale skin.

"Be gone useless woman, i do not call that place my home nor do i wish to return to such a horrid life. I am now free to do as i please, including eating you if you continue to enrage me." Y/n could now feel her eyebrow ticking as she tried to contain her anger but his words were too much.

"You ungrateful fox! I came here to try to make amends, so that you would feel comfortable to come back not because i am unable to look after the Shrine! You want to stay here and drown your sorrows in booze and women then do whatever you want you...you...argh!" Y/n shouted and stormed out, unable to come up with a good insult in her anger, leaving Tomoe's eyes wide before he gripped the woman's hand and dragged it off his chest. He was now intrigued, to speak to a powerful yokai such as himself with no fear for her life was almost admirable. He felt an almost guilty twang in his chest as he thought of her storming through the village, the mark on her forehead a target whilst she most likely drew more attention to herself with her anger. Sighing he stood, if she was to find her demise atleast he could watch.

"That damned stupid fox! Who does he think he is huh?" Y/n let out a huff as the spirits tried to talk her down.

"Please go back to Master Tomoe, it is not safe for you out here." Y/n turned around quickly and pointed where she'd just left.

"Did that sound safe? That arrogant asshole said he's eat me! He should be glad i didn't take a bite out of him to show him i'm not afraid of some yokai."

"You're not afraid of Yokai Land God?" Y/n turned slowly, a large Yokai in front of her as he grinned maliciously down at her, Y/n was engulfed in his shadow as he cracked his knuckles.

"Seriously am i cursed?" Y/n asked herself before stepping back, pivoting and running away from the large Yokai as he let out a bellowing laugh and chased her.

"Come back here delicious girl, you look so scrumptious, i just want to taste those legs." Y/n shivered in disgust as she heard him get closer, darting to the left as he lept at her, his claw dragging along her calf as she let out a loud cry falling forward. The Yokai made a loud crash as he hit the ground, skidding a few feet forward allowing Y/n time to get up and continue her running.

"Oh my, aren't you in trouble now Y/n?" Tomoe taunted as he laid on his fox fire, hovering next to her as she glared at him.

"What do you want?" Y/n huffed out as she hid behind a tree trying to catch her breath as the Yokai ran past her. Tomoe grinned as he leaned closer, his face so close to hers as he inhaled the sweet smell of her fear.

"If you want my help all you have to do is admit you are incompetent and unable to protect yourself and i the Great Tomoe will help you." Y/n let out a scoff as she pushed him back, slowly creeping around the tree trying to spot the Yokai but it appeared she had outsmarted him.

"Fat chance fox face, you're not here to help me, you're here to gloat. If you care so little for the Shrine and the spirits who reside within it then just leave. I don't need your pity." Y/n began walking back where she came from hoping to find her lovely spirits and hopefully get back to the Shrine in time to do the days prayers.

"There you are girly." Y/n turned seeing the large Yokai come back, shrieking she jumped away as he swiped out at her side, the Yokai snarling as she hurried to climb a tree. His large claws coming down just below her legs as she gripped the branches and climbed higher, her hand covered in scratches and splinters as she fought for her life.

"Leave me alone!" Y/n screamed as he shook the tree, her hands clutching the oak as hard as she could to try to stay on the highest branch away from him.

"Come on Y/n, just say it, beg me to help you and i'll seal the contract." Y/n shook her head as Tomoe purred in her ear, enjoying how fearful she was of falling.

"No! I won't beg you to care for me!" Y/n slipped slightly, her trainer dropping into the Yokai's mouth as he moaned and began clawing at the tree harder.

"I can taste the sweetness of fear on your clothes Land God, fall down and let me devour you. I promise it will hurt." Y/n let out a cry as her leg slipped, the cut along her calf scraping against the bark as she dug her nails in. Tomoe was now beginning to panic as she shook her head, she was barely holding on but her pride would not let her be belittled by him.

"Just say the damn words human and i will rescue you!" Tomoe growled as Y/n slipped more, one of her legs gripping the branch tightly as her other dangled just out of reach of the Yokai, but her grip was not good, her naked thigh didn't have enough friction to hold her body up as she slipped further. Tears now poured out her eyes as she scrambled to climb higher but the burn on her inner thigh and the blood dripping from the cut on her calf was hitting her full force as she looked up at Tomoe.

"Please look after the Shrine." Y/n begged as she finally slipped, her eyes wide as she fell quickly, the Yokai's mouth wide as he laughed, Tomoe moved faster than light diving down and catching her. His flames engulfing the Yokai as Y/n's body snapped in his arms, the wind knocked out her lungs as she cried in pain at the sudden resistance. Her eyes staring up at Tomoe as he looked over her, one of her hands gripping his neck before he could stop her as her lips sealed over his and the contract was sealed. Tomoe's eyes closed as he felt her soft lips press against his, he knew this is what he had unconsciously wanted, when he took the plunge and rescued her he had made that decision for himself. However as he felt the shackles fall onto his wrists, and his body entwine with hers, his previous decision weighed heavily on him as she parted too soon for his liking.

"Thank you Tomoe. I'm so tired." Y/n's body gave out as Tomoe smelt the sweet scent of her blood, it was along his Komodo as he looked over her injuries, he could feel the exhaustion in her body as he shook his head and returned to the Shrine.

Y/n woke up groaning in pain, her head pounded and legs felt weak as she pulled back her blanket. Her skirt and top were now replaced with an oversized shirt, her legs both wrapped as well as her inner thigh and palms. As she stared in confusion she suddenly recalled the previous events and went bright red, holding her face as she dropped her head and tried to control her breathing. She'd forced Tomoe into a contract, not just a contract but a kiss, her first kiss. Oh gods her first kiss was with that damned fox, she hoped he wasn't too angry. Getting up she winced as she pulled the shirt down, it was her own from her small bag of belongings, looking around she found a pair of pyjama bottoms and pulled the door open. Wiping her eyes she could feel the blisters on the backs of her feet pulling as she walked towards the kitchen smelling food as she took a deep breath and sighed at the comforting aroma.

"You are awake." Y/n humped as she opened her eyes to Tomoe stood before her, a tray with soup, rice and a dark green drink in his hands as he looked down at her with scrutiny. She felt a shiver run down her back as she nodded, voice caught in her throat as she stared at his lips recalling how they fit against hers. Gulping she shook her head and awkwardly scratched her neck.

"Morning Tomoe, i hope you're okay. I'm just going to use the toilet and then i'll continue with my chores." Y/n was stopped as Tomoe almost growled out his words.

"You fragile human, you are covered in cuts and wounds, you almost died yesterday and you are now rejecting the healing process. Go back to bed before i drag you in there." Y/n yelped as his tail smacked her calf reminding her of how they throbbed the longer she stood.

"Sorry." Y/n spoke sheepishly, turning around and walking back to the room she had woken up in, she could hear Tomoe following her as she sped up, ignoring the pain in her legs as she opened the door and sat back on the futon.

"Good girl." Y/n felt her face heat up as she felt an unfamiliar rush in her stomach.

"Don't..don't say that." Tomoe's face changed into a smirk as he placed the tray down and crouched beside his Mistress, his clawed hand gripping her chin as he forced her to look at him.

"Why not Mistress? Do you not want praise for following instructions?" Y/n gulped as he teased her, her nose wrinkling as she pulled her head free and tucked her legs into her chest.

"You don't need to call me that. I don't need praise." Tomoe's grin turned cat like as he tutted, taking a seat and lounging beside Y/n, placing a hand on her knee and pulling them back down before he brought the tray to her lap.

"But when my Mistress is so obedient how can i not praise her." Tomoe continued his teasing, enjoying how she blushed a deeper shade but didn't dare to look away. Y/n used a hand to push her hair back before smirking back at him, reaching over and placing a hand between his ears, fussing his hair and running his fluffy ear between her fingers as he too turned a deep red and jerked back.

"Thank you for looking after me, good boy Tomoe." Y/n mocked back causing Tomoe to sneer at her before his eyes turned to slits and he stood.

"Eat your meal and restore your health, you are neglecting your Land God duties." His voice was low as he walked out, Y/n letting a small giggle out.

"Will do." Y/n chirped as she picked up the chopsticks and placed veggies in her mouth, moaning lightly at the warm soothing broth that coated them, placing down the chopsticks and collecting a spoon to fully indulge.

"This is amazing, i need Tomoe to teach me how to cook." Y/n praised as she drank some more of the hearty soup, gushing over Tomoe's cooking as he stood by the door listening to her as she did so blissfully unaware of his presence. His nail spiked as she praised him, his ears twitched and tried to control his thoughts. He knew praise from your Mistress/Master was always a nice feeling, when Mikage had praised him it made him beam with pride but this feeling was different, it made his whole body stand straight and the urge to make her say it over and over was deeply rooted in his soul. Tutting he walked away, he was not some silly familiar who would be taken control of so easily, not like the pathetic ones who would beg their masters for attention. Why should he, the great Tomoe, need attention from a silly girl like Y/n.

Y/n placed the tray beside her before standing, she felt exhausted both mentally and physically but she could feel the grease in her hair, probably blood and tree sap aswell based on all her wounds. Exiting the room she found the bath house quickly, turning the hot water on as a sweet aroma filled the room, inhaling she sighed out before undressing. Staring in the mirror she took in all the bandages wrapped around her body and winced, slowly unwrapping herself she touched the bruises on her thighs and legs, aswell as the lighter ones on her upper arms from holding the tree.

"Good job Y/n, do a full number on yourself 2 days before you have school. Guess i'll be wearing dark tights to hide these." Rolling her neck she felt it crack as she let out a satisfied moan, checking the water she looked around and grabbed shampoo and conditioner. Climbing in she let out a pained groan as she lowered her aching legs into the hot water until she was fully submerged and able to lay back. Laying still for a few minutes as she felt her muscles relax and a tension headache roll in from her beaten body.

Y/n cleaned her body thoroughly, her hair finally felt soft and silky once more as she braided it out her face whilst it dried, sat on the side of the bath as she dried her legs. She felt rejuvenated, granted the bath didn't contain healing powers where she came out brand new but she wasn't as achey and sore compared to when she woke up. Wrapping a towel around her body she began looking through the cupboards for some moisturiser, anything that would bring her skin back to life and get the bruises to heal quicker.

"What are you doing?" Y/n let out a scream as she stumbled back and into Tomoe's chest, his clawed hands catching her waist as she looked up at him horrified and clutched at her towel. Stumbling over her words she tried to pull away, turning around as he gently let her go, her face now pink and eyes wide before her face changed to anger and she placed a hand on her hip.

"What am i doing? What are you doing you pervert! Why are you in here?" Y/n's voice grew louder as Tomoe's tail whipped behind him, his hands together in his kimono a steely look in his eyes as his ear twitched at the insinuation.

"I am not a pervert Y/n, you should not have taken your bandages off and now i need to tend to your wounds again. Sit and i shall put some ointment on and wrap them." Y/n blushed harder as the mental image of Tomoe on his knees, touching her leg and thigh popped into her head.

"N-no thank you! I can do it myself." Tomoe raised an eyebrow and shook his head, leaning down and picking Y/n up as she squirmed and panicked, her hands coming to hold down the towel as best she could.

"Tomoe! I'm not wearing underwear! You are a pervert!" Tomoe ran his hand up and down the back of her knee, keeping them from going too high as he kept his head straight and didn't look at how the towel formed around her thighs.

"My Lady i would never disgrace you in such a way, i simply wish to look after you as is my sworn duty per the contract you sealed me into." Y/n shut her mouth as she held down her towel, her face now bright red and her ears burning from embarrassment, she had only been a God 5 days and wasn't sure if this was normal for a familiar to do or if Tomoe was truly a perverted fox. Tomoe placed her on a stool, her hands coming to grip her towel as Tomoe exited and entered within moments, a basket in his hands as he crouched in front of her.

"Tomoe, i need to put some underwear on and a top." Tomoe bent down, ignoring Y/n as he dipped his hand into the ointment and raised her foot, Y/n grunted as his cool hands ran along her legs and up her thighs before he reached the towel and stopped. His eyes stayed on his hands as he ran them back down and Y/n let out a low moan at the pressure against her muscles and massaged the knots out slowly.

"Tomoe..." Y/n groaned out as she closed her eyes and enjoyed how his claws grazes her legs tenderly, his hands leaving one leg to collect more ointment and return to the other, Y/n sighing as she felt her stomach warm and hands clench the stool to hold herself up.

"I'm going to do your inner thighs Y/n, i won't look i promise." Y/n's eyes snapped open as Tomoe stared downwards, his fingers dipping into ointment before he gingerly spread her legs, one of her hands coming to cover herself as she blushed dark red and shivered at his hand touching her knee and slowly pushing higher until his claws almost touched her hips. Rubbing along her inner thighs he held his breath, her skin so soft and pliable under his hands, this wasn't his first time touching them but before she had been in her skirt and underwear. Hidden from him, now if he were to look up he would see her, open for him and only him but he would never destroy her trust in such a way, not his Mistress. Y/n couldn't stop staring at his hands as they dipped below the towel and out, his claws tickling her hips as she bit her lip and tried to remind herself he was only doing this to heal her, not for his or her pleasure.

"Are you okay Y/n? You are so red." Tomoe's voice was full of concern as he inhaled the sweet smell of her arousal, pushing her thighs back together as he looked up at her.

"Y-yes, sorry i'm just not used to being looked after." Tomoe stood slowly, bowing to Y/n before collecting his basket.

"It will be best to air your bruises and cuts then we will bandage them tomorrow for support when you walk." Y/n nodded, her mouth unnaturally dry as she stared at his back before the door closed behind him. Letting out a deep breath she placed a hand on her forehead and willed her body to cool down, standing on shaky legs as she dressed in her pjs and climbed under her blanket.

Tomoe laid on his futon, his pipe in hand as he sipped on his sake, his eyes closed and mind reeling as he recalled how her skin felt under his touch, how she had moaned ever so slightly. How she'd spoken his name in such an unholy way he was sure her title of God had wavered even for a second at the sound. His control was slipping too quick, he had only been her familiar a day, a singular day and he was willing to drop to his knees and serve her in every sense of the word. His tail bristled as he parted his kimono to cool his body, lying back as he stared at the ceiling and took a deep breath of his pipe.

The weekend flew by, with Y/n regaining her strength and attending to the Shrine as much as her familiar would allow, which meant she was allowed to sit and read Prayers and practice talismans. When she had deemed she was healed enough to put the ointment on her own legs Tomoe had all but forced her to sit down and accept it was his job. When monday rolled around Y/n was dressed for school, dark tights covering the bruises and half healed cuts, her shirt buttoned and tucked into her skirt as she pulled on her blazer and adjusted her bow. Brushing her hair she stared at herself in the mirror, she hadn't been in school for over a week now and was prepared for the immature response from other students.

"Where are you going?" Y/n turned as Tomoe stood behind her, giving him a small smile she turned back to the mirror and continued to brush her hair trying to decide what to do with it.

"School. I only have a few months left and i'll be able to graduate." Tomoe glared at Y/n before taking the brush and slowly detangling her hair before placing it down and running his fingers through her hair, claws grazing her head as she closed her eyes and enjoyed how calming it was.

"You should not go alone. It is not safe for a Land God to be unprotected. I shall come with you." Y/n barely registered what she said as she agreed, too relaxed as he braided her hair and placed a hair pin in, taking his hands away as she opened her eyes and gasped at her hair. It framed her face beautifully and the jewel in the hair pin matched her eyes uncannily.

"Where did you get this? It is beautiful." Y/n didn't dare touch her hair but hovered her hand over it as she moved closer to the mirror astonished by how quickly and well he'd arranged her hair. Tomoe preened at the praise, his ears twitching as he smiled proudly, transforming himself into a 'human', Y/n gasping as she spun and grinned at him.

"You look so human! Although i do miss your ears and tail, i can almost tell what you're thinking when you have them." Y/n pouted slightly before checking the time, her eyes widening as she grabbed Tomoe's hand and pulled him to the Shrine's exit.

"Come on i can't be late." Tomoe allowed her to pull him along, enjoying how excited she appeared for such a mundane and boring task.

Y/n sat at her desk, her head in her hand as she wrote down whatever the teacher said even if it went in one ear and out the other. She could feel Tomoe's gaze burning into the back of her head as he ignored the class in favour of remembering how soft she was, if he inhaled deeply he could smell the sweet citrus on her skin.

"Kurama!" Y/n jumped at the sudden screaming, all the girls fangirling as the door opened, smoke and lights seeming to appear as a boy walked through the door with dark red hair and eyeliner.

"Please, do not stop on account of me." Even the teacher swooned as she told him to not be silly, he was welcome to come in whenever he could, Tomoe glared at the tengu as he entered.

"You're in my seat." Y/n stared at the redhead as he hovered over her, his eyes slightly widening as he noticed the God mark on her forehead.

"Your name isn't on it." Y/n spoke back, her eyebrows knitted together as she glared at the cocky redhead, who in return cocked his head and gave her his signature smile which almost every girl swooned at. But not Y/n, instead she was more confused.

"I haven't seen you before, if you wanted my attention congratulations you have it, now why don't you move your pretty butt to another seat or take a seat on my lap if that was what you wanted from this exchange." Tomoe's claws scraped the table as he watched someone disrespect his Mistress in such a way, Y/n gave a disgusted look and stood up, her face close to Kurama as she looked up at him.

"I don't want your attention and i certainly don't want to sit on your lap so why don't you take your arrogant attitude and sit in the back." Kurama grinned as he heard his fans start mumbling and telling Y/n to move, sighing he ran a hand through his hair and spoke.

"My and i thought i was doing a fan a lovely service. I guess some people just can't take a compliment." Y/n ground her teeth as he walked away, the girls swooning at him before glaring at Y/n for being so cruel to their crush, sitting down with a huff she looked forward to see even the teacher giving her a harsh look. Rolling her eyes she looked out the window and waited for the stupid lesson to be over. She hoped that asshole wasn't in all her classes, she didn't need more eyes on her when she had Tomoe burying a hole in the back of her head already.

Y/n was exhausted, Tomoe had been non stop, telling her to avoid Kurama and the other boys in the class, he meant well since he'd scared off someone who tried to bully her. She was grateful to have him around, especially with her legs aching as she walked between classes.

"I am sorry Y/n but i need to go to the Shrine, i will return when you finish." Y/n yawned, nodding as Tomoe apologised, waving him off as she walked towards her next class.

"Well hello pretty God." Y/n froze as she entered a lone hallway, Kurama stood opposite her with a smug look, Y/n clutched her bag to her shoulder as she shook her head.

"You must have the wrong person. Move out my way i don't want to be late." Y/n went to side step him when a large black angelic looking wing covered her exit, stumbling back Y/n dropped her bag falling on her bottom.

"What the hell!" Y/n shouted as Kurama rolled his shoulders and grinned showing off his wings.

"What's wrong Y/n? Never seen a tengu before?" Y/n shook her head as she crawled back, Kurama now walking towards her slowly, his eyes on her with a piercing gaze which made her feel like prey.

"It is a shame to waste such a pretty face but if i consume you then the power i'll hold will be unimaginable, plus to be known as the fearful tengu who killed a Land God is just too much to pass up. I promise to make it quick." Y/n winced as she scrambled up, running towards the nearest exit as Kurama laughed and chased her.

"Come here bunny." Y/n yelped as she ran up the stairs, cursing herself for missing the stairs down, her legs throbbing as she threw open the roof door. Panting as she slammed it closed snd ran towards the other exit, hoping to put some distance between herself and the tengu.

"Nice try Y/n, atleast now i can take my time with you." Y/n ducked as he landed on the roof, falling on her knees as her tights ripped. Could she not have one normal day? Forcing herself up she turned to where Kurama now strode towards her too confident for her liking.

"I suggest you step back from my Mistress." Y/n felt her body be tugged backwards into warmth, an arm snaking around her waist as blue flame appeared beside her. Gasping she looked to see Tomoe, his full yokai form revealed as Kurama let out a laugh and crossed his arms.

"Well, you've got the fox watching over you? I guess today will be the day i kill a God and defeat a fox yokai then." Tomoe let out a humourless laugh as his face darkened, a talisman hitting Kurama as it turned him into an ostrich. Y/n's jaw dropped as Tomoe sent a flame after him, hearing his laugh in her ear as he pulled her even closer.

"Shall we have roast tengu for dinner Y/n?" Her jaw was still wide open as she watched Kurama run around wildly trying to avoid the fire as Tomoe laughed and mocked him. She could feel the heat from his body warming her insides, she felt so exhausted and now he was holding her up she was able to drop her weight. Tomoe stopped laughing as he picked Y/n up, cradling her legs in one hand so she could drop her head against his shoulder.

"You must be more careful Y/n, your fragile body cannot handle it." Y/n nodded before she heard a yelp, her head turning to see Kurama's tail on fire as Tomoe let out another laugh. Y/n scowled, smacking Tomoe's chest.

"Tomoe stop, he doesn't need to be killed." Tomoe ignored her as he pushed her head back into his shoulder and enjoyed Kurama panicking. Y/n pushed his hand away and grabbed his face, forcing the fox to look at her as she spoke in a forceful way.

"Do not kill him. Turn him back to normal." Tomoe felt the harsh pull of the familiar bond tugging at him as he stopped his fire and Kurama turned human. Y/n sighed as she moved her hand from his face and Tomoe wanted it instantly back, to see that fire in her eyes as she commanded him. He wished she would command him more, to feel it deep in him, the need to do what she wanted. It was addictive.

"You insolent fool, if you ever go near my Mistress again i will not be as lenient as i was today." Kurama panicked as he agreed, stumbling back as he exited the roof, leaving Tomoe and Y/n alone. The latter now barely awake as Tomoe stroked her legs, he could smell the metallic blood that seeped into her tights.

"I shall need to wash your legs and bandage them again." Y/n let out a small whine before nodding and closing her eyes.

"Am gonna just have a nap." Y/n barely spoke above a whisper, her words slurred as she slouched more into Tomoe's hold and he could hear her breathing evening out.

The next week passed quickly, Kurama apologised and decided he was going to steal Y/n's heart, whether to eat it or keep it he wasn't too sure either. Y/n's legs finally healed and Tomoe was letting himself relax more around her, allowing her to do her chores around the Shrine and he had taught her how to cook the soup she'd enjoyed so much. Her praise whilst he showed her was too much, his tail had spiked up and his body was sweating by the time he had plated up the food. It was angelic, he'd lapped it up and thoroughly enjoyed himself. Now monday rolled around once more and as Y/n stood in her uniform, this time without the black tights and knee high socks instead which frankly Tomoe was ready to force her into a longer skirt and dark tights to hide her beautiful skin.

"I must stay at the Shrine today Y/n, you should stay here too without me able to look after you that Tengu might try to harm you again." Y/n let out a laugh as she grabbed her bag, patting Tomoe on his chest with a grin.

"Don't be so silly, he's just a dramatic pop star. I'll fine, i'll see you when i get back okay?" Tomoe's eyes dropped to where her hand grazed his bare skin between the fold on his Kimono, electricity striking where her fingers touched before he felt them leave along with her out the door. Letting out a shakey breath he shook his head and regained his composure, he would not fall for a human ever again.

Y/n entered the classroom, placing her bag down before she heard the commotion, all the boys crowded around a small white snake trying to scare it away as she scowled and pushed through the crowd.

"Leave the poor thing alone!" Y/n bent down allowing the snake to wrap around her wrist as she gave it a small smile and walked towards the window, the boys in the class all making comments as she opened the window.

"Come on little guy, it's not safe here." She lowered her hand as she bent put the windowsill, the snake seemed to stare at her for a while before slowly unwrapping and landing on the soft grass. Y/n smiled as she closed the window, the snake turning and staring at her retreating figure.

"Are you okay Y/n?" One of the girls said as Y/n raised an eyebrow confused and went to answer before another girl pointed at her arm. The snake had left a red mark where it had been wrapped around and a white mark around her wrist. Tilting her head she shrugged and wiped at her skin but it stayed.

"I'm sure it's nothing." Y/n gave them a reassuring smile as she continued on her day.

Tomoe tried not to stare at the entrance of the Shrine for the whole day as he sorted through everything, dinner was boiling away and the odd miasma which had appeared that morning was now gone. Sighing he fanned himself as he saw Y/n approach, smirking he watched as she took in the beauty of Shrine as she did everyday she left, he felt honoured at how proud she was to call it her home. His eyes narrowed as she placed her hand in the water, moving quickly as he grabbed her arm causing her to gasp at his sudden appearance.

"What is this?" Y/n's eyes were wide as she yanked her arm back and crossed them, cocking her hip out as they both stared each other down.

"I helped a snake earlier and i must be allergic. I'm fine." Y/n huffed as she moved and rubbed her arm, it didn't hurt but the mark was still there although now the white mark looked more like a bracelet than an actual allergic reaction.

"That is not an allergic reaction. That is a nark of marriage!" Y/n raised an eyebrow at the angry fox as he lectured her on being careful and how he now would have to be by her side every waking moment.

"You're a very dramatic fox y'know." Y/n finally spoke in between Tomoe's lecture making his eyes snap to hers as his aura darkened, hands now inside his kimono sleeves as he glared down at her making Y/n laugh awkwardly and step back.

"What did you say?" Tomoe's voice was deep and full of threat as Y/n shot him a nervous grin.

"Nothing...the Shrine looks amazing by the way! Absolutely magnificent, have you done something new with your hair? Your ears look so fluffy and.." Tomoe huffed as he walked past Y/n, pretending her compliments and praise hadn't instantly made his anger diminish. Y/n breathed out a sigh of relief as she looked at her arm and poked at the mark.

"Why do i have to be nice?" Y/n slumped as she walked into the Shrine, smelling the lovely dinner Tomoe had prepared as she went in her room and changed into her casual clothes. She had better start making some talismans to protect herself, was this God thing ever going to get easier?

Y/n walked through the corridor, Tomoe stood beside her as he glared at any male who looked at her, it was starting to warm up luckily so Y/n's spirit had cheered up and she had easily forgotten about the marriage mark from the previous week. Tomoe however had not and every man that looked towards his Mistress was met with a fiery gaze which sent them running, it gave him great pride to see them scamper away. He had heard rumours of Y/n dating him and although Y/n had been disputing them left and right to any girl who came up to her he had only been shrugging when someone asked him. What harm would it cause for the humans to believe Y/n was his? In a way she was, just as he was her familiar, they just didn't understand that was what he was inferring too, not that he ever tried to correct them. He enjoyed how Y/n would blush and quickly try to dispute the rumour compared to his bored attitude to the question, it only furthered the idea that they were hiding their relationship.

"Hey Tomoe, i just need to use the toilet i'll be back in a minute." Y/n chirped as she waved her hand and entered the girls bathrooms, within moments a few girls came up to Tomoe, trying to steal away his attention as he reminded himself to be polite yet firm.

"Why don't you walk us home today Tomoe? Y/n said you're not together so you can do whatever you want right?" The girl said as she pressed her chest against Tomoe's arm, he tried not show his disgust as another girl played his the hem of her skirt. Were human males so easily tempted by such things?

Y/n exited the toilets as she looked around for Tomoe before seeing him with the girls who had flagged her down earlier than day in gym class, she had panicked and told them to do whatever they wanted just so she could finish changing without them crowing her. Shrugging her shoulders she decided to wait outside the building for him, if he wanted to walk one of the girls home she would find out then but she didn't want to deal with his wrath if she walked by herself and left him to walk alone. Humming to herself she watched the rain as she sat on the step, going through her notes from class when a strong wind blew a few pages towards the bushes, standing up she quickly raced to get them before they got soaked. As her hand went to reach for the paper a white clawed hand collecting the paper, looking up she stared into the pale eyes of the male holding her papers, a smile on his face that made her feel uneasy as she stepped back.

"Here you go Y/n." His voice was smooth, white hair and eyelashes but she swore she knew those eyes from somewhere, taking the paper from his hand she spoke quietly.

"Thanks..." Y/n then frowned as she looked from her paper to him in confusion.

"Wait how did you know my name?" Y/n took another step back as the stranger grinned wide and stepped closer, his umbrella now closed and by his side.

"Why wouldn't i know the name of my beautiful bride?" Y/n panicked as she turned and went to run, her arm grasped before she could make it further than a step, with the hand on her she suddenly lost consciousness and fell into the yokai's arms.

Y/n woke up with a headache, pushing herself off the futon as she held her head eyes still closed, she tried to recall how she got back to the Shrine until she opened her eyes and the panic returned.

"Nope. Nope. Not good. Tomoe's gonna kill me." Y/n stood quickly, jumping as the door slid open and two spirits entered with too much energy for Y/n to process falling back onto her butt as they hovered over her.

"Hello Miss Y/n!" They cheered, each of them holding her cheeks as they pulled her about.

"You are a pretty human like Master Mizuki said!" Y/n slapped the hands away and crawled back, the spirits now pulling out bugs as they offered her something to eat making Y/n cringe as they dangling a centipede in front of her face.

"Good morning Miss Y/n." Y/n snapped her head to the door as it once more slid open, this time revealing the mysterious man from before, the spirits all cheered as he entered.

"Master Mizuki!" Y/n panicked as he came closer, Y/n stared at him as he stood over her with a gentle smile.

"I wanted to thank you for rescuing me the other day when i ventured into the school. It was very sweet of you." Wracking her brain Y/n recalled the snake she had saved over a week ago and her jaw dropped as she looked the yokai up and down.

"Hang on, you kidnapped me because i helped you?" Mizuki crouched and knelt before Y/n as he nodded and took her hands, Y/n stared at him as he spoke.

"Of course, you will be my beautiful bride. I am the familiar of this wonderful Shrine and now we can live here for eternity together. Isn't that wonderful?" Y/n felt a shiver go down her back as she yanked her hands back and scrambled backwards away from him, his eyes turning darker as he seemed to crawl towards her.

"I think you've got the wrong girl. I'm not marrying anyone! Especially not like this." Before Mizuki could reach her Y/n found her footing and got up, pushing her legs to run as fast as she could out the Shrine, the sky was a dark green as she sprinted into the forest. Mizuki stood at the entrance of the Shrine with a subtle smile on his face, she would be back before she knew it.

Panting Y/n rested against a tree, looking back at the vast forest behind her with a sigh, hopefully she had put enough distance between herself and the creepy familiar.

"I really need to listen to Tomoe more." Y/n placed a hand on her head pushing her hair out her face as she took deep breaths, she needed to continue running to keep the distance between herself and the snake. Shaking the slight ache out her muscles she continues running, trying to figure out how to get back to the main roads or atleast somewhere she could recognise.

Tomoe was seething, none of his flames could find his blasted God and his anger was reaching new heights as he imagined all the horrendous things that snake could be doing to her.

Y/n's eyes lit up as she saw lights, a burst of energy entering her body as she pushed herself to sprint again although the joy was quickly replaced by confusion as she noticed the Shrine. Mizuki and the spirits stood by the entrance, a gleeful smile on the snake's face as he walked towards her.

"What the hell." Y/n turned her head to see the forest she had ran into, her eyebrows knitted together as she turned back to the Shrine, Mizuki now stood before her with his hand outstretched.

"You must be exhausted my Lady. Please come and rest." Y/n thought about returning to the forest but it was now dark and she didn't know what lurked in the shadows, atleast here she knew where her danger was. Nodding she took his hand, his skin soft under hers, Mizuki blushed at her warmth in his hand and smiled walking her towards her bedroom.

"This our bedroom Lady Y/n. But i will let you rest now, i will not do anything you don't want me too." Y/n crossed her arms over her waist as she stared at the double futon, rose petals around the room with candles, this snake obviously had other ideas for how her kidnapping was meant to go.

"Thanks." Y/n mumbled out as she closed the door in his face, pushing her weight against it as she collapsed on the floor and stared at the room. She was deep in it now, with no way out she just had to pray Tomoe found her before the snake could marry her. Crawling to the futon she blushed dark red at the lingerie left for her, the thin white silk would barely cover anything as she quickly threw it across the room as though it burned. Mizuki definantly believed this kidnapping was going to go his way, shivering she crawled under the blankets in her uniform and tried to sleep. She tried to imagine she was in the Shrine, her spirits squabbling whilst Tomoe called her to wake up or he'd drag her out of bed but it only made her heart miss being free more. Eventually she fell into a dreamless sleep until morning when she awoke to a weight over her waist, cuddling into her pillow she mumbled for Kotetsu and Onikiri not to hide in her room if they upset Tomoe but when she felt a hand pull her closer her eyes snapped open.

"Good morning my beautiful bride, you looked so angelic i had to join you." Mizuki purred in her ear as he cuddled closer to her, Y/n bolted up, turning so her feet were between her and the snake as she gave him a horrified look.

"What are you doing in here! Y-you promised not to do anything unless i said so." Mizuki let out a small laugh as he blushed and hid his face, crawling towards Y/n, his hand grabbing her leg and pulling her under him. His face now nuzzling against her ribs and chest as she placed her hands on his shoulders and struggled to push him away with a yelp.

"I know but you just look so delicious, just let me have a taste, i know we should wait until we're married but what does it really matter? You're mine anyway." Y/n now full panicked as Mizuki placed a kiss on her waist and pinned her hands beside her, her legs kicking out as he climbed between them, her skirt pushing up as he sunk further down, eyes on her with a gleeful glint.

"Get your hands off my Mistress right now." Y/n's eyes lit up as the wall between the Shrine and there stood Tomoe, flames around him as he glared at Mizuki on top of Y/n, his eyes darting over her as he saw her skirt against her hips and the snake between her legs with fear in his eyes.

"Ho-how did you get here?" Mizuki shouted as he moved off Y/n allowing her to close her legs and push her skirt back down, scampering up and rushing to Tomoe as he held her against him.

"If it is for my Mistress i would move heaven and earth to find her. Now, it is time for punishment for touching her in such a disgraceful way." In a way only i should ever touch her, Tomoe thought as he began burning down the Shrine, Mizuki rushing out the Shrine towards a beautiful sakura tree, his eyes filled with tears as he turned to Tomoe.

"Please, do not harm my tree." Y/n felt pity as he guarded the tree, the spirits of the Shrine rushing to him as they cried out that their house was being destroyed. Y/n teared up as she pulled against Tomoe.

"Please Tomoe, i just wish to go home." But Tomoe would not listen, not when this snake had touched Y/n in such a way, not when she had been pinned down and almost dishonoured, all he saw was red as he conjured a fire ball.

"Thank you for showing me what you love most, i shall take great pleasure in watching it burn." Y/n's eyes widened as she shouted Tomoe's name and moved out his arm to stand in front of Mizuki and the tree.

"Stop! He has learnt his lesson!" Tomoe froze as he felt the cold wash of her words splash him, forcing his fire to distinguish as she stood before him. His hands balling up in anger as he stormed towards her, her head at his chest as they both glared at each other.

"This yokai touched you, he kidnapped you and almost disgraced you and you dare to stand in my way from destroying him?" Y/n placed her hands on his chest to try to soothe the angry kitsune as she shook her head and looked down.

"I know it sounds silly but please Tomoe. He knows what he did was wrong, don't take the last of his happiness because of me." Mizuki fell to his knees in tears as Tomoe stared down at Y/n, her head now turned to look at the broken familiar as he explained his God had died. It sparked pity and guilt in Y/n's chest, he was so lonely and wanted company, he had done wrong but he just wished for a Mistress to serve. Crouching down Y/n took his hand gently which made Tomoe's chest hurt in a way he wasn't used to as she promised to return and see him.

"You what?!"

Y/n stood sheepishly in front of Tomoe, now back in the Mikage Shrine as he once more lectured and shouted about how reckless she was and how dare she agree to see that pest!

"Come on Tomoe, everyone deserves a second chance." Y/n gave him a smile as she moved forward and lifted her hand to run it through his hair, her nails scratching his ears making his tail swish as he tried to keep his composure.

"Thank you for saving me, i don't know what i'd do without you y'know?" Y/n blushed as she complimented the fox, his eyes wide as she ran her nails along his ears making his body heat up and mind go blank before she let go and gave a small giggle.

"I'm going to have a bath and go to bed. I missed you all so much." Tomoe let her walk past him as her words ran around his mind, she had missed him. The words were like the first drink in the dessert, a meal after being starved for centuries and he was sure it would feed his desire for months.

Y/n laid on her futon, her hair now braided and half dry as she tossed and turned unable to settle, her door sliding open as she squinted and looked towards the light. Tomoe stood in the doorway, his kimono half open as he entered and slid the door closed behind him, Y/n now sat up and called out his name rubbing her eyes.

"Are you okay Tomoe?" Y/n mumbled as Tomoe crouched beside her, his eyes piercing into her soul before he pushed her lay back down and crawled into the futon next to her, her body still as she took in Tomoe cuddling her.

"Shh my Lady, go to sleep, i will keep you safe and warm." His hand came to pull her head into his chest as he wrapped around her, Y/n's eyes were wide as she stared at the pale skin that pressed into her cheek, she was sure this was some dream. Y/n gulped and nodded as she forced her eyes closed and tried to calm her beating heart, he was right, he was so warm and she hadn't realised she was cold until she was engulfed in his warmth. Tomoe wrapped his tail around Y/n's waist as she began to drift off, he was aware of how bold of a move he had made but could not find it in himself to care as he heard her breathing even out.

Tomoe glared at the sky as he watched the lightening strike closer each time it appeared, Y/n wrapped a raincoat around herself as she grabbed her school bag and her lunch, waving bye to Tomoe as he hummed back. The Shrine was to have a visitor who appeared to be in a bad mood, sighing he continued with his duties. Atleast Y/n would be at school and away from the God's anger as she was prone to be set off easily.

"Princess Narukami." Tomoe greeted as she grinned and walked into the Shrine.

"Hello Tomoe, when i heard the Shrine had a new Land God i did not expect to hear rumours of them being a puny human girl." Tomoe scowled at the insult to his Mistress, his hands tucked in the sleeves of his kimono as Narukami walked around the Shrine.

"That damned man, stealing Tomoe away from me and then leaving him in the hands of this little girl. I won't forgive him." Narukami shouted as she picked up a picture of Y/n throwing it against the wall as she stormed out. Tomoe's eyes widened as he rushed to follow the angry God.

Y/n watched the lightening as it seemed to get closer, bored out of her brain as she barely listened to the teacher, her mind recalling Tomoe saying the Shrine was to have a visitor. She wished she could have stayed home but she had a test today she could not miss, not that Tomoe had tried to convince her to stay which was off since he tried to keep her close at all times. Shrugging Y/n looked down at the pages she had scribbled in and sighed, jumping at the lightening seemed to strike directly outside the window.

"Y/N L/N!" Y/n jumped back as the window next to her smashed, the room turning dark as a woman appeared with lightening flashing around her, Y/n fell back and stared up in shock at the God.

"You do not deserve the title of God and i am here to relieve you of the burden." Y/n crawled back as the God got closer, bending down and gripping Y/n's face as she flinched, this was how she was going to die. But instead of violent murder a kiss was gently placed on her head, and Y/n's eyes opened as the God moved back, the gold glow following her as Y/n watched her Godhood be taken.

"Let go of her!" Tomoe shouted, throwing fire at Princess Narukami, causing the angry goddess to move back from Y/n as Tomoe caught her, looking over her as he cradled her face.

"Tomoe." Y/n whispered with a small smile as the kitsune sighed in relief that she was still alive, glaring at Princess Narukami as she looked down at him with a smug smile.

"Come Tomoe and be my obedient Familiar." Tomoe growled as Y/n gripped his arm, his anger rising.

"No." Princess Narukami deadpanned before a malicious grin came over her face, a mallet appearing in her hand as she hit Tomoe over the head with it. Y/n shouted out as smoke appeared around Tomoe until it cleared and in his place was...a child Tomoe? Y/n caught him as he fell back, his eyes wide as he looked at himself in horror.

"If you wish to be restored to your true body come to Mikage's Shrine and seal the contract." Princess Narukami laughed as she left, leaving Y/n holding Tomoe as she stared out the window.

Y/n sat on the bench with Tomoe's head in her lap, fussing over him as his temperature seemed to rise by the minute.

"Huh? Y/n?" Kurama's voice jolted Y/n as she looked up at him, the popstar pushing back his hair as he gave her a cheeky grin.

"What are you doing outside my apartment building? Did you want to come cuddle with me instead of that stupid fox?" Kurama winked at Y/n before a leaf hit him harshly in the face making him scream out as Tomoe sat up on Y/n's lap and glared at him. Kurama stared at Tomoe for a moment before bursting out in laughter, Tomoe now crossed his arms as Y/n wrapped her arms around him and stood.

"You live here Kurama?" Kurama composed himself and nodded, looked down at Tomoe as Y/n explained what happened with the Mallet, her Godhood and now baby Tomoe's temperature.

"Well you're more than welcome to stay the night with me Y/n but the damn fox can freeze out here for all i care. But don't worry, i'll keep you company." Kurama grinned as he got closer, his nose almost touching Y/n's when another leaf landed on his nose causing it to burst into a nose bleed, his body jumping back as he shouted at Tomoe.

"I won't leave Tomoe out here." Y/n declared which made Kurama sigh before agreeing to the fox coming into his apartment aswell.

Y/n's jaw dropped as she entered, looking around as she carried Tomoe towards the bedroom.

"This is my bedroom, you can stay here tonight Y/n but the kitsune can sleep on the floor, i can keep you warm." Kurama purred out as he took a string of Y/n's hair between his fingers and went to nuzzle her neck. Y/n glared at him as she walked over and placed Tomoe on the bed, his eyes glaring deeply into Kurama as he watched Y/n bend over in her school skirt.

"He is not sleeping on the floor! If i'm staying in this bed so is he." Kurama huffed as he looked at Tomoe and conceded, not like the little guy would stop him from being able to make a move on Y/n, even if she wasn't a God she was still hot and he wanted to bite the forbidden fruit so bad. As though Tomoe could hear his thoughts another leaf smacked Kurama as Y/n called out and they all began shouting at each other until Tomoe collapsed, Y/n panicking as she told Kurama to get some cold water and a flannel.

Kurama sat on the bed as Y/n placed the flannel on Tomoe's head.

"Why will his fever not go down?" Y/n questioned as she moved Tomoe's hair and caressed his little face before she looked at Kurama.

"The mallet only changed his body, his powers are still running rampant and his small body can't handle it. He won't get better until he becomes normal again." Y/n bit her lip as she looked back at Tomoe, Kurama moved over to his bedside, collecting a pill as he explained it would help, shoving it into Tomoe's mouth as Y/n gasped. Tomoe clenched down on Kurama's finger as he screamed out and threw Tomoe onto the floor, Y/n rushing over and picking him up as she scolded Kurama.

Y/n fussed more over Tomoe, the soup he had taught her to make being spoon fed to him as Kurama leaned against the doorway watching, mumbling to himself about the damn fox. Y/n changed the flannel on Tomoe's head, placing a gentle kiss in his skin as she begged him to get better, standing as she awkwardly rubbed her arm. Kurama stood in his pjs watching her as she looked up at him with an adorable expression that he was sure she didn't know she was giving.

"Umm, can i borrow some clothes to sleep in please?" Tomoe's ears perked as he opened his eyes and looked at Kurama's smug face, handing her a shirt and some boxer shorts which made Y/n's face go red as she thanked him and scurried to the bathroom. Kurama turned to Tomoe as he huffed.

"Go sleep on the sofa or something fox." Tomoe glared at him as Y/n came back in, the boxers peeking out the oversized shirt as he tried not to stare at her nipples poking through the thin material, her clothes neatly folded but both Kurama and Tomoe could see the frills of her underwear poking out as she placed them down. Smiling at them both she sat next to Tomoe and checked his temperature, her eyes sparkling as she looked at Kurama in joy.

"His fevers gone down! The tablet must have worked thank you Kurama." Y/n beamed as she grabbed the flannel and replaced it with a cold one, Tomoe staring at Y/n as she tucked him in.

"Well i guess we'd better get into bed then Y/n." Y/n's face went red as she turned to look at Kurama, a smirk on his face as his wings expanded.

"Huh? I thought you'd sleep on the sofa." Y/n chuckled awkwardly as Kurama deadpanned, grabbing a pillow as he offered it to Y/n.

"This is my bed, i'm not sleeping on the sofa, if you don't want to join me then you can take yourself to the sofa and put that pest on the floor." Y/n pouted as she looked at Tomoe, his eyes now closed as she ran her hand through his hair.

"Fine. But stick to your side alright?" Kurama grinned as he pulled the blanket back, his wings taking up half the bed whilst Tomoe took up the other half, Y/n bit her lip as she climbed in, the shirt crawling up her body as she laid down making Kurama lick his lips at how her body looked in his boxers. This must have been some kind of wet dream, if only Tomoe wasn't here he would believe it, instead Y/n placed a pillow between her and Kurama and cuddled up to Tomoe's body. Huffing Kurama crossed his arms and turned to face the other way, so much for running his hands up and down her legs until she was panting and asking him for more.

Y/n woke up as she felt small hands tug on the shirt she wore, yawning she looked down at Tomoe's little body curled into her chest, his hands gripping the shirt as he breathed evenly. A sudden tug made her aware of the arm around her waist and warmth on her back, looking down she saw black nails against her naked skin where the shirt had ridden up exposing her midriff, her face turned dark red as her ears burnt, trying to shift away from him she heard Kurama groan and pull her closer. His face now nuzzled in the nape of her neck as he moaned, his nails now grazing her stomach as he rolled his hips into her butt. Holding her breath Y/n stayed deadly still before the hands loosened and Kurama turned over mumbling something before snoring. Letting out a breath she looked down at Tomoe, jolting up as she saw his face red, her breasts smothering his little face as she pulled him free. Tomoe taking a deep breath as Kurama fell off the bed at the sudden panicked movements, holding his head he sat up seeing Y/n fussing over Tomoe whose eyes were wide.

"I'm so sorry Tomoe! I didn't mean to suffocate you." Kurama's jaw dropped as he realised the lucky fox had been face deep in Y/n's chest, glaring at Tomoe as he looked away trying to hide his embarrassment. Damned Fox Kurama thought.

"Why are you cooking whatever he wants?" Y/n turned her head to where Kurama sat, tilting her head in confusion.

"He always does everything for me and makes sure i'm okay, this is nothing compared to what he does for me." Y/n grinned a she rolled the rice into balls and placed them on the plate, she wasn't quite sure if she'd made them right but hopefully he would enjoy them. Kurama watched in envy as she took them through to Tomoe, sitting him up and watching as he ate them, Y/n beaming with pride as he praised her for the cooking. Kurama walked in as Y/n stroked Tomoe's hair before he smacked her hand away.

"You must be on your guard with him. He is not so innocent." Y/n waved her hand away before Kurama grabbed one of Tomoe's ears.

"Talking about me huh?" Kurama laughed as Tomoe fell over, Y/n picking him up and cradling him to her chest.

"Don't be so rough with him!" Y/n chastised as Kurama pushed his hair back and looked at Tomoe.

"Getting Y/n to come to your aid, not bad Tomoe. Anyway i need to get to rehearsal, find a way to get that mallet or he won't make it more than a few days." Y/n nodded as she placed Tomoe down and moved to clean the kitchen. Tomoe stood by the window as Kurama mouthed to him. His eyes going wide as he looked down in shame, he was supposed to protect Y/n and instead she was caring for him in his useless body.

Y/n heard the door closed as she turned, calling out to Tomoe she found the bedroom empty, rushing to the window she watched as he walked towards Princess Narukami's spirits and left. Her jaw dropped as she rushed to dress, pulling on her uniform and rushing out the apartment. As she stood where he had been she felt tears in her eyes, he had gone to Narukami, he must have truly been desperate.

"Oh Tomoe i knew you'd come back!" Tomoe was lifted from the floor as Narukami cuddled him into her chest and he couldn't help but recall how much softer Y/n had been when she cuddled him.

"You are so cute like this but i much prefer you in your true form, so big and strong. Now. Seal the contract with me and be mine forever." Narukami declared as she let go of Tomoe, closing her eyes and pouting before she opened her eyes to an empty hallway.

"Tomoe!" She screamed as she sent her lion spirits to search for him.

Y/n sat on the bench outside Kurama's her knees draw to her chest as she stared at the ground, a blue butterfly landing on her shoulder as Kurama approached.

"What are you doing out here?" He questioned as she raised her head, the redness around her eyes betraying her.

"Tomoe left. He went to the Shrine." Kurama's eyebrows rose as he sighed out before handing Y/n a feather, Y/n took it gently.

"They have been with you since you arrived and i'm sick of being the only one to hear them." Y/n gasped as Onikiri and Kotetsu appeared.

"Lady Y/n!" They cried as Y/n hugged them, both of the spirits crying out about Tomoe as Y/n tried to listen.

"Tomoe is hiding away!"

"He refused to be her familiar and she is going to destroy the Shrine."

"Please help!"

Y/n stood by the entrance of the Shrine as she watched the poor lion spirits be shocked.

"Find me Tomoe!" Princess Narukami screamed as she turned and spotted Y/n.

"I have a deal for you." The Princess' eyebrow raised as Y/n gulped and stepped forward.

"If i can find Tomoe you give me back my Godhood and return Tomoe to normal." Princess Narukami thought about it for minute before agreeing.

"Agreed. But if my spirits find him before you, you can stay as a lowly servant for the rest of your miserable human life. You have 30 minutes. Y/n nodded quickly as she ran inside the Shrine, hunting for Tomoe, calling out to him but it was no use. She only had 10 minutes before she would become a servant regardless if anyone found him. Onikiri and Kotetsu popped up as Y/n was losing hope, shushing Y/n as they directed her to the table, a small mirror surrounded in butterflies laid hidden under a book. As she removed the book she saw Tomoe, his little body laid down and his body covered in a red flush, gasping she held a hand over her mouth.

"You need to retrieve him." Onikiri whispered before they disappeared, Y/n bit her lip as she pushed a hand into the mirror, begging Tomoe to take her hand as she willed him to come out.

"Tomoe." Y/n whispered as she held him in her arms, his body boiling as he struggled to breathe, rushing out the Shrine she called out Princess Narukami.

"I have Tomoe!" The lightening God huffed as she snapped her eyes to her spirits, a silent threat that they would be paying for this.

"Fine. I am a woman of my word and i do not want him if he does not want me." Princess Narukami bent down and placed a kiss on Y/n's forehead, bestowing her Godhood once again.

"They'll explain how to fix him." With that she left, her spirit holding the mallet up to Y/n with wide eyes.

"Swing the mallet and will him to be big again." Y/n nodded as she held the mallet, swinging it at Tomoe as she shouted out for him to grow.

Tomoe grew instantly, the smoke clearing as Y/n stared at him, his hair now long which enhanced his beauty making Y/n turn red as the lion spirit took the mallet and left. Y/n gulped as Tomoe looked at her, the Shrine's energy now clean and the repairs fixed within seconds of Tomoe being normal once more.

"You look...beautiful." Y/n stuttered out as Tomoe approached her, pushing her hair out her face before he cupped her face.

"Thank you Mistress." Y/n didn't have time to react before his lips sealed over hers, her hands coming to touch his chest as he hungrily pressed into her, deepening the contracts kiss until he pulled away against his own desires. Y/n's eyes opened as she watched him become a familiar once more, her hand moving to her lips as she bit them. He had sealed the contract once more, and yet that did not feel like a contractual kiss.

Y/n was struggling to not stare at Tomoe as he stood in the garden, the broom he leaned against whilst a butterfly landed on his hand was what he had been doing. Now he stood gracefully, his long hair tied behind his head, sun beaming down on him like he was being blessed by the Gods and Y/n couldn't help the rush of arousal that ran through her veins. She blamed the contract kiss for the confusing emotions, or maybe she was coming down with a fever, that had to be it, that's why she was rubbing her thighs together as she watched him. She couldn't ever call him a pervert again whilst she was doing this. Tomoe turned his head to Y/n as he smelt her sweet arousal, his whole body reacting to her as she jumped and scrambled inside hiding away from Tomoe as he chuckled.

"My sweet Mistress. One day you will beg me to follow you and that will be the day i finally break." Tomoe looked at the sky as he inhaled still able to smell her sweet aroma, the butterfly flying away as he closed his eyes and enjoyed the moment.

Y/n sighed as she laid in her futon, her shirt rode up as she tossed and turned until she finally stood, pulling her shirt over her underwear as she left her bedroom. Entering Tomoe’s bedroom she found him reading a book under candle light, his eyes finding hers as she shuffled her feet around.

“Can i sleep in here please?” Y/n whispered but Tomoe heard clear as day, his ear twitching as he nodded, his eyes raking along her half naked body as she scampered into the futon and turned her back to him.

Tomoe grinned as he leant close to her neck, his hand coming to her thigh as he placed a kiss on her neck, his canines gently pressing into her skin.

"Thank you for looking after me Mistress. I owe you." Tomoe purred out, his tail coming to caress her legs as she closed her eyes, his nails now gently running up and down her thigh as he nuzzled her neck. Y/n let out a quiet moan as she rubbed her legs together, Tomoe preening at her bodies response to him until Y/n's eyes opened and she slammed a hand over her mouth. Tomoe let out a laugh as she rolled onto her stomach and away from his ministrations.

"You're so mean." Y/n mumbled into the pillow as Tomoe stared at her, how the moonlight lit up her skin and each freckle and curve was his to take in, including her cute frilled underwear which made his mind go feral. Forcing himself to control himself he laid down on his back, one arm over his eyes as the other ran through her hair.

"Goodnight Y/n." Y/n turned her head to see him relaxed, moving to lay her head on his arm and cuddle into his side as she whispered goodnight back and settled into sleep.

Y/n laughed with Ami and Kei as they walked home, Kei was going on about her amazing boyfriend and teasing Ami as she blushed whenever Kei implied more.

"Oh come on Ami, you're telling me you've never wanted to kiss a guy? I mean Y/n back me up here you think about kissing Tomoe all the time right?" Y/n went red as her mouth opened and closed in panic at Kei's words, Kei let out a laugh as Ami rushed to poke Y/n.

"Come on you're so obvious Y/n." Kei joked as Y/n closed her mouth and began shaking her head.

"I don't think about kissing Tomoe! I just..." Y/n went silent as she realised how much she thought about Tomoe, sometimes it was kissing which she could admit to her friends but she couldn't admit all the other dirty thoughts and feelings she had. The worst part was most of the thoughts were based on things Tomoe had done to her, his act so innocent and caring and here she was being perverted towards him.

"It's normal to think about it Ami, don't let Kei scare you." Y/n finally spoke as she reached over and flicked Kei's forehead making the girl yelp and a friendly argument begin.

Y/n walked into the Shrine, her thoughts away from her as she noticed Tomoe sat with a mirror, his nails raking through his now short hair as Y/n's jaw dropped. Tomoe turned with a smirk to look at Y/n before his face dropped to one of a confused at her face.

"Is something wrong?" Y/n wanted to cry as she got closer and ran her hands through his hair, thinking about all the things she hadn't been able to do with his glorious long hair.

"You cut it." Y/n whispered with a pout as she imagined brushing his hair, braiding it, washing it. Tomoe scowled as he stood up, looking down at Y/n as she continued to pout.

"Are you upset i cut my hair?" Y/n nodded before she looked away and sighed then smiled at Tomoe.

"I'm only a little sad because you have gorgeous hair and i was hoping to brush and braid it but i understand it's your hair so you can do as you wish. It looks lovely short as well so please don't worry." Tomoe smirked as he leant down.

"If you want to brush my hair so bad why didn't say? I still have a tail." The last few words came out as a purr as Y/n gulped and looked at his swaying tail in awe, she really hoped this wasn't some cruel joke as she nodded quickly.

Y/n sat happily as she slowly brushed the fur on Tomoe's tail, his book in his hand as he read, the pair in silence as they enjoyed each other's company.

Y/n sat with Ami and Kei as they talked about their plans for the weekend, Kei had just broken up with her boyfriend and wanted to go to the beach to see all the cute boys and show him she was worth more than him. Y/n smiled as she agreed although she could feel Tomoe's gaze in the back of her head as she explained she didn't have a swimsuit, Kei grinned deeply as she agreed to bring one for her.

Tomoe grumbled as he walked on the sand, Mizuki next to him as Y/n ran towards Ami and Kei, the latter glaring at the boys as she loudly protesting to them being there saying they would deter all the cuties. Y/n laughed it off and said they'd stay out their way, Kei relented with a pout and handed Y/n a bag before shooing her to the dressing rooms. Y/n waved the boys off as Tomoe laid on a sunbed in the shade, a book in his hands as Mizuki commented on all the cute girls.

"What do you think?" Y/n spoke as she twirled before Ami and Kei, Ami gushing over Y/n in the light blue bikini which seemed to fit every curve and notch of her body perfectly.

"Wow, doesn't Y/n look amazing? I see everyone else here thinks the same way as well." Mizuki teased as he leant over and watched Tomoe glaring at the males who openly gawked at his Mistress's body, much the same as Tomoe was doing from behind his book. He could not tear his eyes from her as she pulled the hair band from her hair and splashed in the ocean with the two girls, her breasts bouncing as she jumped around and squealed at the cold water hitting against her body. This was torture to watch her be so carefree, so innocent to men as some boys got closer, Kei happily inviting them over as Y/n climbed out and ran towards Tomoe and Mizuki. Her bikini holding her in as she bounced and stopped before the two men, Mizuki now grinning widely as he stood and placed a hand around her waist whilst Y/n gave Tomoe sparkling eyes.

"Would you like to join us Tomoe? The water is lovely." Y/n grinned, her head tilting as Tomoe pulled the book up higher to hide the dark blush on his face and the irritable glare he was trying to hold in at Mizuki's hand almost touching her bikini bottoms where they tied perfectly on her hips.

"No thank you Y/n." Y/n pouted slightly before shrugging and leaning over Tomoe to pat his head, her hands finding where his ears were concealed to give them a small scratch of appreciation. His eyes now staring at her chest as she bent over him, teasing him with no knowledge of the power she held before she stood straight and waved at him.

"Have fun Tomoe." Mizuki sing songed as he followed Y/n into the water, the fox now overcome with jealousy as he watched Mizuki and the other males flirt and splash with Y/n as she held Ami's hands and spun her in circles in the water. She looked angelic and he wished deeply to pick her up and hold her body against his to show everyone she was his but he could not enter the water. His past self was being cursed as he glared at the water in disgust.

Y/n giggled as she let go of Ami, allowing her to paddle around as she went for a swim, Kei busy flirting with the boys as she ran her hands along one of their abs and winked at him, she was too good at it honestly. Y/n stared up at the sky as she swam backwards, it was so calm and beautiful she could stay in the ocean forever if she could breathe underwater. Closing her eyes she drifted out before she felt the current pick up, forcing her to open her eyes and look around as the waves rolled in, panic setting in as she heard Ami trying to swim closer to the shore. Swimming towards her friend Y/n tried to maintain composure, if she panicked she'd drown, just as she reached Ami she was dragged under, Y/n watched in terror as her hands disappeared into the water and didn't waste a moment before screaming out and diving under to find her friend. Tomoe sat up straight up as he heard Y/n's voice, searchign the ocean as he watched the waves crash harshly against the rocks, Kei and Mizuki now rushing to him as Kei explained Ami had gone under and Y/n was trying to get to her. Tomoe raced towards the water, his feet almost in when Y/n emerged, her head bursting through the water as she coughed and spluttered, spinning around until she locked eyes with Tomoe.

"Tomoe!" Before she could continue her sentence the kitsune was diving into the water, his body disappearing for a minute as Y/n dived under trying to spot either Ami or Tomoe but was forced up by the waves as she swam to shore trying to get the water from her lungs. Kei ran to Y/n trying to help her up as she coughed and clung to her friend both of them staring as the water became calm, it felt like hours passed before Tomoe surfaced, Ami in his arms. Y/n called out to Tomoe and Ami as he carried her to shore, both girls throwing her arms around the pink haired girl as they checked on her. Y/n breaking away and throwing her arms around Tomoe as she thanked him, his hands gingerly coming to hold her waist as she pressed her wet body against his and for a moment he forgot his feet still stayed in the water.

"Hahaha! The Great Tomoe finally has made a fatal mistake." The sky darkened as Y/n and Tomoe turned, his hands clutching at her as they watched a yokai exit the water, half fish with an eyepatch and long hair. Y/n's eyes widened as she turned her head to see all the humans passed out, Tomoe's grip tightening on Y/n as he held her close to him, his eyes glaring at the Dragon King as he laughed.

"Here you are, right before i gave up trying to find you. I have been waiting a lifetime for you enter the waters Tomoe." The man shouted with a deep grin as Y/n scowled.

"Who are you?" Y/n shouted as Tomoe pushed her behind him.

"I thought you'd never ask. I am the Dragon King ruler of the sea! Now if you'll excuse me for just a moment whilst i retrieve a debt from an old friend." Y/n placed her hands on Tomoe's arm as he kept her a distance from him.

"A debt...if i only i knew what that meant." Tomoe's voice smooth and calm before the Dragon King laughed, yokai appearing from the water as their tendrils grabbed Tomoe flying him high in the air.

"Tomoe!"

"I am more than happy to remind you, you ignorant fox! Exactly 526 years 208 days ago at 18 minutes and 41 seconds past 2am a certain yokai fox called Tomoe wiped out 7 dragons, 3 sharks, 5 rays and one sea slug at the north gate of my Palace. He then destroyed the north gate and surrounding buildings and finally he stole my right eye and fled! It is tome for you pay it back!" As he finished his speech he called out the oyster, shoving Tomoe inside with a laugh as Y/n ran towards the sea shouting for Tomoe.

"You will slowly turn into sustenance for the oyster and i shall return in a day or so to a lovely big pearl. Now let us head back for a celebration!"

"Wait hold on!" Y/n shouted as she approached the Dragon King, his eyebrow raising as he looked around.

"Why are you awake?" He questioned as Y/n picked up a rock and threw it at him, the Dragon King easily dodging it as she shouted at him.

"I am Y/n L/N Land God of the Mikage Shrine and Tomoe is my Familiar now release him at once." The Dragon King let out a loud laugh as he bent over clutching his stomach before standing and wiping a fake tear from his eye.

"No can do little girl now run along." Y/n scowled as she saw the oyster begin delving deep, panicking she gripped it with all her might holding her breath as it dragged her under. Y/n recalled how Tomoe had said he couldn't enter the ocean and now because of her he was captured. As she struggled to breathe she tried to push through it until she felt hands grip her body forcing her out the water as she coughed up water.

"Your persistence is obnoxious." Y/n opened her eyes to stare at the Dragon King before he dragged her to a near by rock, placing her down as she coughed more water up, her eyes darting to him as she glared.

"Where is he?" Y/n demanded, now crawling towards the Dragon King as he laid his head against his hand and looked at her in boredom.

"I had the sea slugs relocate him, he's far far away. Yes i did carry you to safety now you owe me." He placed a paper down as Y/n scowled gripping in her hand before she chucked it behind her, the Dragon King rolling his eye before placing another down making Y/n hit her hand on the rock in annoyance.

"Fine! Whatever could you possibly want huh? Just give me Tomoe back!" The Dragon King stared her down as he explained his debt.

"I want my eye returned, that fox stole it years ago and i demand it back. I had defeat carved into my face by that useless yokai." Y/n leaned forward as she stuck out her hand.

"I get your eye and you give me Tomoe yes?" The Dragon King let out a laugh as he put his hand out.

"It won't be that simple, my eye has been gone for 526 years. Do you really think it possible to retrieve my eye after so long?" Y/n nodded as she grabbed his hand, shaking it firmly with a determined look.

"If it's to save Tomoe i will accomplish anything."

"Fine, but i am only holding onto the fox as collateral for two days." Y/n nodded as the Dragon King dove under the water leaving her on the rock as she sighed out.

"Damn you Tomoe, why did you have to be such an idiot 500 years ago." Y/n looked up at the sky as she climbed back into the water and swam to shore. She needed to find Mizuki and fast, she only had 2 days before Tomoe would become a pearl. Y/n ran towards the beach as she found Mizuki and her friends all panicked as they called out to both Y/n and Tomoe.

"I'm here!" The girls ran to Y/n hugging her as she quickly lied that her and Tomoe had been swept ashore further along the coat and Tomoe was on his way to the Shrine. Grabbing Mizuki she hid behind a beach hut pressing him against the wood as she looked up at him.

"The Dragon King has Tomoe, i need to find his eye that Tomoe stole 526 years ago. I have 2 days before he turns Tomoe into a pearl!" Y/n whisper shouted as Mizuki pulled her into a hug, a smile on his face as he almost jumped with joy at the idea of the fox being gone allowing him to move in on Y/n.

"Oh that is so awful Lady Y/n, it is such a shame there is nothing we can do to save him." Y/n pulled out his arms and hit his chest as she scowled at him.

"I know you have that time travel thing. I need it to go back in time and find him." Mizuki was shocked as he nodded quickly, turned on and a little fearful of Y/n's determination as she pulled him towards the lodge.

"Come on."

Y/n sat across from Mizuki as she explained what had happened as well as the debt Tomoe owed. Mizuki scowled as he sighed.

"I have to ask you a question. Do you love Tomoe?" Y/n's eyes bulged out her head as she stood quickly, her face bright red as she shook her hands.

"What! Whe-where did get that idea from?" Mizuki let a small laugh out as he looked down.

"One of your friends told me. They said you changed a lot after Tomoe came around and i have to admit i am jealous. I feel so much envy of that fox, i do not believe he deserves such a kind and beautiful Mistress. It does not matter to me whether he were to stay in the ocean or be rescued but i will do this for you. To show you my devotion to you and only you." Y/n rubbed her arm as she listened to Mizuki's confession, her cheeks blazing as he collected his items and burnt the sage to begin the adventure to the past.

"I shall accompany you to the past to keep you safe, but i do not think it is wise to anger Tomoe's past self as he was a blood thirsty murderer." Y/n nodded as she inhaled the scent, her eyes slowly drifting closed as Mizuki placed a t shirt over her bikini to cover her in the world over yonder.

Y/n woke up in a dark area, standing up as she looked down at herself, she was all in one piece with a long top covering herself as she began walking around.

"The eye! You have the Dragon King's eye!" Y/n screamed as Yokai grabbed her legs, a lady gripping her tightly as she clawed at her stomach.

"Give me the eye!" Y/n smacked the Yokai as hard as she could, trying to push the lady from her body as she kept screaming about an eye. Y/n fell to the ground as the Lady's clawed hands came towards her stomach with wide eyes and a menacing grin. Y/n panicked as she shoved her foot against the Yokai's face making her fall backwards before a blue flame smashed into the Yokai, the lady screeching as the flame chased her away.

"Stupid wench." A voice spoke.

Suddenly a yokai dropped before her, gasping she froze as the yokai turned, long white hair and white ears perked up as Tomoe grinned at her. Y/n was in shock as she stood from the ground on shaky legs, stepping back as he looked her up and down.

"Well well, what is a young human doing here?" He purred as he walked closer, she had not seen his long hair since he had cut it and was once more mesmerised by his beauty, she stayed frozen as he approached her. Y/n's eyes were wide as his clawed hand came up to her face, her hair twirled around his fingers before he tugged her into him, forcing her to look up at him as she yelped in pain.

"You smell so delicious." Tomoe took a deep breath in as he smelt her hair, something in him recognised the scent but he couldn't pin point it, almost like he was smelling something so familiar it should have been obvious.

"To-Tomoe, can you let go please?" Y/n whispered as she placed her hands on his chest and pushed him back slightly but he didn't move instead he flashed her a sharp grin and tightened his grip.

"So you know who i am puny human? And what pray tell made you search for me hmm?" Y/n could feel her blushing as he brought his face closer running his nose along her cheek as he inhaled her scent once more, it was irritating him that he could not place the smell on her.

"I...i need the Dragon King's eye." Y/n stuttered out as she felt his tail wrap around her legs, reminding her of the night she had spent asleep next to Tomoe, his tail tickling her thighs as he slept. Tomoe's eyes widened as he pulled back and stared at her with a look she couldn't decipher before she felt her hair be yanked hard making her cry out in pain as his other hand gripped her waist, nails digging into the shirt she wore.

"You were sent by the Dragon King to seduce me and steal the eye hmm? Well then, i guess it is time for you to die." Y/n dug her nails into his chest as she pushed him back, trying to get out of the harsh hold he had on her before she freed her hand and managed to grab his ear. Tomoe froze as she tugged on his ear and shouted.

"Bad boy! Don't be so mean!" Y/n chastised as she recalled all the times she had to part Kurama and Tomoe by dragging their ears and how it worked so easily each time. Y/n pulled his head down as he quickly let go, almost compelled by something deep in him as Y/n glared at the fox.

"Say you're sorry!" Y/n shouted as she placed a hand on her waist, the fox yokai's eyes wide as his mouth opened and closed confused.

"Sorry." Tomoe rushed out as he felt another tug on his ear, Y/n huffing as she loosened her grip and rubbed his ear until his cheeks went red with a small smile.

"Good boy Tomoe. Now, can i have the eye please?" Y/n asked sweetly as she now caressed his hair, his eyes still wide and now his whole body seemed to be that of a tamed cat compared to the wild fox that had been stood before her.

"Tomoe!" A deep voice called, Tomoe now standing to full height forcing Y/n to let go of his ear as he pulled her behind him, his tail curled around her.

"I am busy Akura-ou." Tomoe spoke to the unknown yokai, Y/n trying to see as she clutched at his Kimono to try to look receiving a smack on the thighs from Tomoe's tail in warning.

"Too bad. I am ready to move on, this place is boring. I want some fresh blood. The girls in this village did not satiate my urge." Y/n gulped as her eyes closed, she wished she wasn't here but hoped whoever the Yokai was he wouldn't notice her.

"What is that delicious smell? Are you hiding something from me Tomoe? I thought brother's shared everything." Y/n could hear the smirk as Tomoe pulled her around in front of him, her face in a panic as her eyes met the Yokai, his hair red and horns coming out his head whilst he dressed in a long black feathered coat. Y/n squeaked as Tomoe pulled her into his chest, his hands on her waist as he gripped her tightly.

"Not this one, this one is going to be mine. And i plan to force every noise i can out of those pretty lips." Y/n looked at Tomoe in fear as he grinned down at her, his claws pushing into her waist as he pressed her against his front. Akura-ou let out a laugh as he got closer, his hand coming out to hold the same strand of hair Tomoe had, but his claws were longer and painted black, his energy was darker aswell which made Y/n lean back into Tomoe as the yokai smelt her hair.

"You're no fun Tomoe, she looks like she'd burst in your mouth so easily." Y/n blushed red at his insinuation, gulping as he moved his claw to run along her lips before slicing her lower lip, she winced as he ran a finger through the blood and brought it to her mouth. Moaning to himself with eyes closed as she sucked her lip into her mouth tasting the metallic blood on her tongue as his eyes opened.

"Such a shame. Well, i will continue on, i'll try to leave you some fun at the next village if you don't too much time with her." Akura-ou let out a deep laugh as he left, Y/n felt Tomoe's grip loosen allowing her to turn to face him as he lightly held her face inspecting the cut on her lips.

"You owe me for saving your life human." Tomoe swiped his thumb across her lip and placed it in mouth as he walked past her, leaving her stumped as she blinked in confusion.

"Tomoe!" Y/n shouted as she spun but he gone, sighing she ran her hands through her hair.

"Are you okay Y/n? Did you meet Tomoe?" Y/n jumped as Mizuki appeared behind her his eyes full of concern as he rushed to her side, a small drop of blood made it's way from her hip to her thigh as Mizuki fussed over her but Y/n had her mind on other things.

"I found him but i couldn't get the eye." Mizuki nodded as he checked her wound, it was only a small claw mark but he was furious with Tomoe, that damned fox had manhandled Y/n. Standing straight he looked around to see if he could spot him but by now he was long gone and Y/n wasn't sure what to do.

"Which way did he go?" Y/n shrugged as she looked in defeat at the floor, she should have chased after him but he'd made her feel some way inside that she didn't understand. She shouldn't feel so weird hearing him talk about her or touch her that way, her Tomoe had touched her in far more delicate areas, but this wasn't her Tomoe. This was the past and she didn't know what he'd do if she found him again, the way he'd looked at her was now engraved in her mind and some part of her wanted to know how he'd have gotten her make all the noises he wanted to hear from her.

"I've found his tracks come on Y/n." Mizuki pulled the girl out of her thoughts as he ran towards the village, Y/n could hear the screaming and crying of villagers as the flames burned in her eyes, thick smoke coated the air. Coughing Y/n wiped her eyes and searched for Tomoe but he wasn't in sight, letting out an aggravated shout Y/n turned around stomping her foot before she froze. In the slight distance a pale blue flame burned inside a house, but unlike the village that was being torn down the flame appeared to be staying still. Y/n ran towards the light as Mizuki followed, the pair creeping towards the house as Y/n let out a yelp as she heard a door slam. Tomoe stood by the back door, his eyes staring into the forest as he took in the smoke and terror Akura-ou was creating across the way, sighing he shook his head and reentered. Y/n crouched by the window, watching as Tomoe approached a young human girl, her Y/c hair laid against the pale wood and skin looked greyish as she coughed and stared at Tomoe with lidded eyes. Y/n held a hand over her mouth as Tomoe tried to feed the Dragon King's eye to the girl but she refused, Tomoe shook his head explaining it would save her and they could be together forever. Y/n couldn't believe her eyes as Tomoe left to find something to help the eye go down, Mizuki gripping Y/n as he pulled her into the house.

"Tomoe risked his life to save hers?" Y/n whispered as she watched the girl, her eyes now closed and her breath was laboured, the Dragon King's eyes rest in her palm.

"Take the eye Y/n before he comes back." Y/n crouched down holding the eye as she looked between her hand and the poor girl, she didn't know what she would call the feeling in her chest. Maybe Jealousy or Envy, but she couldn't call it that, Tomoe risked his life for her time and time again, he chose to be her Familiar. But would he do it all if she wasn't a God? If she was human like the girl on the ground. Gulping Y/n ignored Mizuki as he tried to rush her, hovering over the girl as she grasped her lips and placed the Dragon King's eye in her mouth. Mizuki watched in disgust as Y/n threw away her chance of saving Tomoe to save the life of the pitiful human, Y/n was too human, she had too many morals and loyalty to those she didn't know. It sickened him that she could not be selfish like he could, like Tomoe could, they were here because of Tomoe's selfish behaviour.

Y/n huffed as she sat in the beach house, rubbing her head as she tried to come up with ways to get the Eye in the present day, she'd had enough lectures from Mizuki for a life time and now she just wanted to hit the Dragon King over the head and demand Tomoe back to save the headache. She recounted the events in the past back to Mizuki before she froze, her eyes lighting up and she stood quickly and grabbed his hands.

"That Yokai! She said i had the eye! She said i had it and kept trying to take it off of me!" Y/n starting pointing at her stomach where finger bruises had formed from the lady's grip. Mizuki stared confused as Y/n babbled on about the lady, trying to explain exactly what she looked like.

"I know who you're talking about." Y/n let out a cheer as she pushed Mizuki out the door demanding he take her to her yokai.

"You have not changed in 500 years." Mizuki spoke as Y/n rounded the corner, the yokai who attacked her now drenched from head to toe in her bikini top and long skirt looked angry.

"And who the hell are you?" The lady screamed before her eyes made contact with Y/n and she froze, a grin coming on her face as she stood.

"You're the one with the eye. My my you look good for a human after 500 years, that stupid fox isn't with you i presume? Damn Yokai burnt my cloak." Mizuki repressed the eye roll as Y/n moved towards the Yokai.

"I want to make a deal with you. You get the eye from wherever it is, without killing me, and i'll give you anything you want within reason." The yokai grasped her chin examining Y/n's body before a malicious grin came over her face.

"In that case, i want 30 years of your life. Take or leave it sweetheart." Y/n stared at the Yokai as Mizuki stepped forward with a scowl.

"You're being ripped off Y/n! That eye is not worth 30 years of your life." Y/n ignored Mizuki's words as the yokai turned to Mizuki with a scowl.

"And how do you suppose she gets it out then? Both my eyes have second sight, without me you can kiss that eye goodbye. Stay out of this you pathetic snake boy." Mizuki's face dropped as Y/n grabbed the Yokai's arm and turned her around.

"Okay you can have 30 years of my life." The yokai grinned as she stuck out her hand, Y/n lifted her hand.

"Hmm there's a girl who knows how to bargain."

"Y/n don't, don't do it!" Mizuki grabbed her hand, standing between Y/n and the Yokai with a terrified look. Y/n let out a small laugh and ruffled Mizuki's hair.

"Don't worry about me Mizuki, 30 years of my life won't kill me and Tomoe only has one day so i can give up 30 years so he can live." Y/n walked past Mizuki as she shook the Yokai's hand, not noticing Mizuki walking away as the Yokai assisted her to lay down. Y/n let out a small whine as the Yokai placed a hand on her sternum, Y/n's eyes closing as she felt something begin exiting her sternum, the energy depleting from her body as she passed out. The Yokai laughed as she held the gold glowing flame in her hand.

"Well it seems you have something much for valuable than years Land God! I've got the Dragon King's eye and a Land God's soul! What a lucky day for me!" She twirled as she stared at the soul, she had succeeded.

"I tried to warn you this might happen. Why can't you just listen and trust me to protect you. You are too kind, too moral and Tomoe does not deserve such a wonderful person to love him. To take on his debt, you're relentless and nothing would have stopped you. I cannot stop myself from needing to serve you, i'm like a moth to a flame." Mizuki bent down, placing his hand on her pale face as he pushed his lips against hers, savouring how she felt as the contract sealed. He felt freed, an odd feeling after being sealed into a contract but his heart fluttered as he pulled away and turned to the yokai.

"You just...but why?" She questioned, confusion on her face as he approached her, water suddenly exploding on her as she dropped Y/n's soul, allowing Mizuki to collect it and place it back into Y/n.

Y/n felt like the air was returned to her lungs once more as she yawned, her eyes opening slowly before she sat up, placing her hand on her head as she looked around to find Mizuki kneeled before her.

"Good evening Mistress, do you feel better? Today is the first day that i, Mizuki, serve as your familiar! I'll be so amazing you'll forget all about Tomoe." Y/n's jaw dropped as she watched Mizuki almost floating on air, his face one of pure happiness as he stared at her.

"What?" Y/n shouted as Mizuki blushed, a sheepish grin on his face.

"Good new right?" Mizuki's happiness was stopped as he used his snake to grab the yokai as she attempted to crawl away, his aura turning dark as he placed her in front of Y/n.

"How dare you try to deceive my Mistress, i suppose i have no other option than to end your life." His smile was sickening as he raced forward to slash her, Y/n's eyes widening as she panicked.

"Stop Mizuki do not touch her!" His whole body freezing as he took in the sacred word binding, feeling the sweet pinch of her command forcing his body to stop and obey her. It was euphoric, sweet paralysis, a true pleasure to be held in Y/n's power. Turning to her he went bright red as he fell to his knees and begged.

"Do it again, please give me commands and tie me up with your sacred command!" Y/n cringed as she stared at Mizuki, his whole body wiggling in pleasure as he stared at her waiting for a command.

"Don't be a pervert Mizuki. I already have to deal with Tomoe and now you." Rubbing her forehead she closed her eyes before standing, Mizuki rushing to her side before she pushed his hands away.

"You truly are a beautiful Goddess Mistress." Y/n glared at him as she placed her hands on her hips.

"You kissed me in my sleep against my will! If we don't get Tomoe back i'm going to feed you to the spirits!" Y/n shouted as Mizuki wiggled at the threat making Y/n scrunch her nose up before slapping him across the face as he blushed.

"Stop being a pervert!" Mizuki held his face as he held in his excitement, his new Mistress was so fierce, it made his whole body tingle.

"I'm so glad you're adapting to the new changes." Mizuki whispered.

"This is the Dragon King's eye." Y/n deadpanned as she stared at the pearl in her hand feeling defeated as she laid on the sand and let out a small scream.

"Why is everything so difficult!" Mizuki held in his giggle as he watched her temper tantrum before he crouched beside her.

"We still have the eye, that was the deal wasn't it?" Y/n nodded, her nose in the sand before she sat up and shook her head, staring at the pearl in thought. Mizuki pulled the tickets the yokai had given him, a thanks for not murdering her, which he couldn't have done even if he wanted to with the sacred command in place. Thinking about it he repressed a wiggle of pleasure at the thought of being held against his will once more.

"I still think you should have let me punish her. Instead we only got these." Mizuki spoke as Y/n scowled at him and grabbed the tickets, flicking sand at him.

"Don't be so silly, i just wanted her out of here before you tried to kill her." Mizuki looked down at Y/n as she stood, brushing off her shirt as she looked over the tickets, atleast they had a way to the Dragon King's palace now.

"I assure you a familiar will never kill in front of their God, surely Tomoe was the same right? He would never want you to see his dirty work. It might have angered you." Y/n raised an eyebrow as she thought about Tomoe but pushed it out her head and hurried Mizuki to the ocean.

"My Dragon King someone is coming right at us!" The Dragon King ignored his subordinate before the sea slug opened the door in panic. The King looking up bored from his calculations.

"It's the oyster with the fox!" The Dragon King's eyebrow raised as he hurried up shouting Tomoe's name as he flung open the doors to the banquet room. There stood Tomoe, the oyster now ripped open from the inside and the fox gave him a dangerous look as he spoke.

"Good grief. The sensation of being wrapped up in flesh brought back such fond memories. It has been a long time Dragon King. However showing yourself in front of my Mistress Lady Y/n, well that is unacceptable. You knew i would not conduct such bloody business in front of her. You had such a nerve to believe you had one, but now we have changed venues and she will not see the mess i am to make of you as i did 500 years ago. Well, the fun is to begin." The Dragon King's eye went wide as fire began to grow from Tomoe's hand.

Y/n fiddled with her shirt as she sat across from a Lady, her dress beautiful as she explained the item in her hands before the Lady asked what a Land God was doing in the Dragon Kingdom.

"My friend is being held as collateral so i'm venturing there to return the item her stole and bring him home." Y/n smiled as the Lady smiled back and spoke of her husband, her voice smooth and body language full of poise and pride. Y/n felt herself be chucked against the wide of the cart as the Turtle rolled, the half coat flying out the window as the Lady's eyes widened. Y/n rushed to the window before Mizuki caught her, pulling her back as the Lady asked her to sit.

"It is okay, it has been swept away by the current and i fear it will be long gone by now. I imagine that tremor came from the palace. I can always make another half coat, let us carry on our journey." Y/n reached over taking the Lady's hands in hers as she sympathised with her.

"I am so sorry, it was a beautiful garment and i am sure your Husband would have adored it." The Lady smiled back before Y/n sat back, the three of them relaxing as they waited for the journey to finish.

Y/n's eyes were wide as she looked at the Palace, the Lady behind her looking around with distain as sea slugs got closer.

"This is beautiful." The ground shook once more almost knocking Y/n off her feet as the slugs spoke to the beautiful Lady.

"The King is trying to put the fox down." Was all she needed to hear as she began running towards the banquet hall, following the sounds of crashes and the blue flames coming from the room.

The Dragon King fell to the ground under the rubble as he grinned at Tomoe and stood, Tomoe encased in Blue flames as they stared each other down.

"You look far more beastly now than you did on the beach. Even a thousand year love would cool if someone saw you like this." Tomoe raised an eyebrow as he took in the King's words.

"So you know Y/n?" The Dragon King laughed as he stared at the fox in defiance.

"She came pestering me to bring you back, she offered to get my Right eye in exchange for you." Tomoe's fire diminished as she leaned against the wall with a small pout.

"That stupid girl, she is the only Land God who is so incapable of doing such a thing." The Dragon King deadpanned as his jaw dropped.

"That crazy girl is a Land God! I thought she was your lover! Why were you holding her so damn close!" Tomoe threw a fish at the Dragon King as he stood and placed a hand on his hip.

"She may not look the part but she is still the God of Mikage's Shrine! She is not some woman to be touched so carelessly with sullied hands." Tomoe glared at the Dragon King before the door flew open revealing Y/n as she panted, Tomoe's eyes widening as he took in her appearance. The shirt she wore barely covered her bikini, small rips in the waist and hips that resembled claw marks as she pushed her hair back and stormed in. Tomoe felt panic rush through his veins as she stormed towards him, throwing his body into the oyster and slamming it closed. Y/n stared in disbelief as the oyster rocked back and forth from the sudden movement, her jaw open before she clenched her jaw and slammed her hands against the oyster.

"Get out here right now you stupid fox! What do you think you're doing in there after almost destroying this palace huh? And speaking of this palace 500 years ago you were just as stupid as you are now so come out here right now and deal with your punishment or i swear i will pry to you out of there!" Tomoe stayed silent as he felt her hit against the oyster, his hand on his heart as he thought about her, caring for him, coming to save him. It was so admirable and now he felt too embarrassed to face her. Y/n huffed before she pointed at the Dragon King making him jump as she walked over and poked his chest.

"You! Take your stupid eye and get him out of there so i can take him back already! I have had a hell of a day and quite frankly i want a hot bath and to go to bed. You're grown yokai for goodness sake!" The Dragon King nodded in fear as he tried to force the oyster open but Tomoe gripped it from the inside as Y/n face palmed, she had two idiots fighting each other. Mizuki appeared next to Y/n with a grin as he placed an arm around her shoulder.

"If he is causing so much trouble Mistress shall we return to the Shrine and i will run you a bath and massage your body?" He almost hissed in her ear, Y/n looking at him in disgust ready to shout at him before the oyster flew open and Tomoe launched at Mizuki. Tomoe held Mizuki's kimono in his hands as he glared down at him.

"Mistress? What did you do you pathetic little snake!" Tomoe froze as he realised he was out the oyster, turning his head to where Y/n was almost breathing fire as she grabbed his ear and forced him to kneel before her as she scolded him.

"You came out the damn oyster to shout at Mizuki!" Tomoe could feel her nails dig into his ear as he inhaled, he could smell himself all over Y/n as he always could, he made it as habit of scenting her, reminding every Yokai she was his. But now, now he could smell that disgusting snake on her, tainting her. Pouting he crossed his arms listening to his lecture before Y/n sighed and let go of his ear, falling forward as he caught her in his arms, a content smile on her face as she looked at him.

"I'm so happy you're okay! Y'know, i went into the past and you weren't as scary as everyone says." Y/n let out a laugh as Tomoe froze, staring at her deeply before bowing down and placing a kiss on her lips, shocking Y/n as he pulled away a second later. Licking his lips as he tasted the faint hint of her blood, the taste familiar as Y/n blinked in confusion.

"I had to get that snake off you." Y/n nodded slowly as Tomoe stood, Y/n carried in his arms as he glared at Mizuki before departing.

Y/n seemed to be in this position too much with Tomoe as she sat with her arms crossed, pouting as he lectured her on letting her guard down, his hand pointing to Mizuki as he yelled animated.

"Don't even get me started on agreeing to 30 years of your life in exchange for that stupid eye!" Y/n shot a glare at Mizuki as he blanched and hid behind Tomoe who quickly kicked him away shouting at him for allowing her to make such a stupid decision.

"And then to come to the Dragon Kingdom with him? What would you have done if he attacked you and i was inside that oyster!" Y/n went to argue back but Tomoe continued his rant.

"Do you think this snake can protect you like i can? I swear you enjoy making my blood pressure go up!" Y/n pouted again as she looked away, she felt like a child being scolded by her parent. Tomoe sighed as he reached down and placed his hand on her chin, bring her face up to look at him as he tilted his head and spoke calmly.

"Do not put your life in danger for me again." Y/n nodded, she could feel his breath on her mouth, could smell his scent and recalled how his past self had been so similar yet so different it made her mind spin.

"Good, now." Tomoe moved away and turned to Mizuki with a dark aura.

"You are going to be punished for kissing Y/n." Y/n blushed as she watched Tomoe throw Mizuki outside shouting at him to clean and stop slacking but she kept replaying his words. He was being punished for kissing her, not for tricking her into being her familiar, but for kissing her.

Y/n sighed as she brushed her hair, she had 30 minutes before she had to meet Kei and Ami for the mixer. Tomoe stood behind Y/n with his arms in his kimono as he watched her, his chest constricting as she bent over to put her brush away, her skirt riding up and showing the frills on her underwear making him blush. He thought about how foolish humans were, Y/n had no idea her skirt was so short or that when she bent over she could flash anyone which made him agitated as moved to stand right behind her.

"Change." Y/n jolted as she looked over her shoulder at Tomoe, confused as she stood and looked in the mirror, she thought she'd picked a nice outfit. Nothing too fancy or flirty, just a simply black skirt and jumper.

"Why? I think it looks nice." Y/n shrugged off his demand as she tried to decide how to style her hair, Tomoe scowled as he looked down at her. He hated the feeling that over came him at the idea of any other man seeing her like that, to see her legs or to feel them the way he had, it burnt him like fire deep in soul to imagine it.

"That skirt is far too short and i will not have you parading around in something so indecent." Y/n'e eyes widened as she turned and looked at Tomoe, his face serious as she looked down at her outfit and back at him. Placing a hand on her hip she raised an eye in defiance and shook her head.

"No." Y/n grinned to herself as she saw Tomoe's ear twitch at her resistance, although it was short lived when she felt herself be hoisted over his shoulder as she yelped in shock.

"Tomoe! Put me down!" Tomoe let out a chuckle as he walked towards the wardrobe, one hand holding her over his shoulder as he looked through her clothes, trying to find something that would hide her body from others.

"Tomoe!" Y/n whined hitting his back as she felt his hands grip the back of her thigh, she could feel her stomach growing hot at his touch. Embarrassment was now flooding her veins as she wiggled in his hold causing him to readjust her on his shoulder, his hand now holding her inner thigh to keep her still as she sucked in a breath. He hadn't touched her thighs since he'd had to change her bandages and now her skin pricked up at the warmth of his palms on her soft inner thighs.

"Stop squirming or i will spank you." Y/n froze, she hadn't been meaning to rub her thighs together, directly on him either but she had been lost in her thoughts and was sure if Tomoe stood in front of a mirror there would be a wet patch on her baby blue underwear. His threat was still hanging in the air as she tried not to think about it but it was like a bee to honey as she imagined him slapping her gently before massaging it better as he punished her. She was now certain if his hands moved higher he would be able to feel how wet she was, this was a whole new level of embarrassment, she'd never be able to look at him again.

"This should do." Tomoe spoke, trying to keep his voice steady as he smelt her arousal, directly next to his nose, it was too much and he hadn't expected her to react in such a way so quickly. It was making him insatiable, the need to throw her down and take her, to hear her moan out his name instead of going to this stupid mixer. He'd already tried to convince her she had Godly duties but it had fallen on deaf ears. Placing her down he handed her a baby blue dress, the sweetheart neckline was not the most modest choice but it was the same colour as his kimono and his flame, he couldn't have made it more clear she was his. Y/n looked at the dress, her face flushed red as she agreed and hurried him out the room, sighing when she was alone as she looked at the ceiling. Tomoe was going to be the death of her if she couldn't get this attraction under control.

Ami and Y/n sat beside Kei as she flirted with one of the boys across from them, Y/n wasn't the least interested in them but Kei was still trying to get back at her ex and Ami was too cute to say no to. Y/n's eye twitched as one of the boys said they had a girlfriend, she was sat across from him as he stuck his tongue out.

"So Fox, stalking Y/n whilst she's on a date?" Tomoe's ear twitched as Kurama dropped onto the branch next to him with a smirk. Tomoe ignored him until Kurama whistled.

"Wow she really dolled up for this huh?" Tomoe preened as he looked at Y/n, the blue complimented her well and the length almost touched her knees compared to the little black skirt from before.

"Yes, i dressed her beautifully, the colour suits her well does it not?" Tomoe flicked his fan, covering his face as Kurama looked closer before deadpanning and looking at Tomoe.

"Sly fox." Tomoe smirked as he fanned himself, proud that his message had been received loud and clear by the tengu. Kurama smirked again as he leaned on his hand and teased Tomoe.

"You're taking this well, Y/n on a date, anything could happen and as her familiar you can't stop her from wanting more...human relations." Tomoe's hand froze as he listened to Kurama, his eyes turning to slits as he looked at him. Kurama now grinned widely as he continued to torture Tomoe.

"She is an 18 year old girl, she'd bound to want more in life than just being a Land God, most humans want children...or atleast to try to make them." Kurama let out a laugh as Tomoe broke his fan. Kurama let out a screech as Tomoe threw fire at him making him fall out the tree.

"So what are you girls into?" One of the boys asked, Kei instantly answering as Y/n took a sip of her drink and looked up, finding the reddish pink hair coloured boy looking at her. Going red she looked back down as she heard him chuckle, his foot coming to touch her leg as she jumped and looked at him in shock, his eyes not even on her as he engaged in conversation with his friends. Y/n was sure she had imagined it before she felt his foot rub up and down her leg again, his eyes now full of mischief as she moved her leg away making him stick out his tongue. Y/n didn't want to ruin this mixer for Kei but the guy across from her was getting on her nerves as he suggested Kei and him swap seats so Kei could get to know his friend more.

Tomoe glared at the back of the boys head as he scooted next to Y/n, watching her sit up straight as she moved further away, Tomoe praising her in his head for not letting the boy sit too close until he threw his arm behind Y/n's seat and leaned against her whispering in her ear.

"So, what do you like Y/n?" His voice grated her as his other hand landed on her clothed thigh and she was now thankful Tomoe had made her change or it would have been her naked skin he touched. Scooting closer to Ami she gave him a friendly smile.

"Oh uhh, i like cooking, i especially like cooking soup." Y/n scratched her neck anxiously as she thought of Tomoe, recalling how much she enjoyed cooking for him and when he would teach her new things. The guy laughed as he twirled a piece of Y/n's hair around his finger.

"Really? I think it's so cute when a girl loves to cook." Y/n let out an awkward laugh as she moved her head away watching her hair fall put his hand as he let it drop next to her head.

"That's cool, does your girlfriend like cooking?" Y/n put emphasis on girlfriend hoping he would get the hint or atleast act as though he wasn't single but he only laughed and shook his head.

"No, she likes being a pampered princess. But i think it's nice to be the one who's pampered, especially by someone as pretty as you." Y/n cringed inside before she suddenly half stood and looked at the boy.

"I need to some fresh air. I'll be back soon." The boy's eyes were wide as she scooted past, scurrying out the restaurants door and away from the awkward tension. Sitting down Y/n put her head in her hands as she tried to calm her heart, she didn't understand why that guy was acting like that when he had a girlfriend.

"I'll keep you company." Y/n jumped as a hand landed on her shoulder and she held in a groan as he sat next to her, a smirk on his face as he looked her up and down, almost enjoying how she tried to hide her face from him. Moving forward he placed a hand under her chin to pull her face out her arms, making her look at him as Y/n frowned at him.

"Come on, smile for me atleast. You were the prettiest girl in there and i know you were loving the attention i gave you." Y/n scowled as she pulled her face free from his hand.

"I don't want your attention, i'm not that type of girl thanks." Y/n went to stand, feeling his hand on hers as he pulled her back down making her fall into his lap as he held her waist. Her eyes now wide as she pushed against his check, his eyes dark.

"Then what kind of girl are you huh? I think if me and you got out of here i'd see how freaky you really-" Y/n yelped as her arm was tugged, the guy suddenly flying off the fountain as Tomoe stood behind him, his hand on Y/n's arm and foot raised from where he'd kicked him.

"Finish that sentence and you die." Tomoe threatened as he pulled Y/n against his chest, his eyes staying on the guy as he scampered up with fear in his eyes.

"I didn't know she had a boyfriend!" He stuttered out before running back into the restaurant. Tomoe turned to Y/n, his hand on her chin as he looked her over, he could see the slight tears in her eyes.

"Thank you." Y/n whispered, she felt silly, she'd dealt with Yokai trying to kill her, being kidnapped, losing her home and the first thing to make her cry was a human boy. Tomoe's eyes softened as he ran a finger under her eyes, catching the tear that almost fell making her eyes close as he held her gently against him.

"You do not need thank me. I will always keep you safe." Y/n nodded before opening her eyes with a sad smile.

"Can we go home now?" Tomoe nodded, his urge to chase after the human and enjoy some bbq was replaced by the need to see Y/n smile with joy.

Y/n stared at the wall, steam filling the room as she lay with half her face in the warm water, the scent of citrus filling the air as she bathed.

"Are you almost done in there Y/n?" Y/n squealed as she sat up, Mizuki's voice scaring her as she heard the door begin to open, seeing his face with a wide smile on it as she screamed and covered her chest.

"Mizuki!" Said yokai only laughed as he held up a towel with an innocent smile, Y/n ducked into the water as she stared in horror at her familiar coming closer.

"There is no need to be shy Lady Y/n, i am only here to assist you." Before he could get any closer a leaf hit his head causing him to fall face first onto the ground, Tomoe stood behind him glaring at his body.

"Were you trying to look at Y/n in the bath?" His voice was deep and terrifying as Mizuki smiled up at him and waved.

"Of course not i simply wished to help her out and dry her body off, it is only my job as her familiar." Mizuki's voice filled with innocence as Tomoe grabbed his kimono and dragged the snake out, Mizuki waving goodbye to Y/n as she deadpanned at the stupidity of her familiars.

"I'd better get out now to make sure Tomoe doesn't kill him." Y/n sighed to herself as she stood, turning her back to the door as she wrung out her hair.

"Y/n i have taught the snake a lesson, he should know to respect your..." Tomoe's voice stopped as he stared at Y/n, her head turned to him as her face went bright red, hands still holding her hair as her naked body was in his sight. Squealing Y/n covered her chest, luckily her back faced Tomoe as she shouted at him.

"Get out!" Tomoe slammed the door as quick as possible, staring at it as he felt frozen in his spot unable to move. His mind replaying how her body looked, every inch of her free for his eyes to roam, her body covered in a layer of water that made the view even more perverted.

The door opened as Tomoe looked at Y/n, his eyes wide as she bumped into him, his hands catching her as he pulled her wet body against his kimono and held her still. One of her hands pressed against his chest whilst the other clung the towel wrapped around her middle.

"Y/n." Tomoe breathed out, her hand fisting in his kimono as she blushed but could not look away.

"Yes Tomoe." Y/n's voice barely above a whisper as he gulped, his mind overflowing as he looked down at her, her chest pressed together and smushed against his, he could feel the slight dampness under the towel where his hands touched. He couldn't hold back any longer, not when she looked at him with half lidded eyes, not when he could hear her breath hitch as he got closer and especially not when he could feel her cross her legs and squirm.

"I'm sorry." Tomoe whispered as his lips met hers, the kiss feral as he gripped at her, pushing her back into the bathroom and sliding the door closed to be able to press her to it. His entire body on fire as he slotted a leg between hers, a hand beside her head as he devoured her.

Y/n moaned against Tomoe's lips, her hand coming to clutch his neck as his hand pulled her waist to press her into his chest, rubbing her along his thigh as she whined at the feeling. Tomoe's hand clenched around the door, his nails scraping loudly as he groaned as the feeling of her pressed into his thigh, all his senses completely encompassed by Y/n. Pulling away he kissed her jaw, running his canines down onto her neck as she curled her hand in his hair and tugged him further into her. Gripping the towel he yanked it from her hand, throwing it behind him as he moved back to stare at her naked body, loving how her eyes glowed with innocence yet she didn't move to hide herself from his gaze.

"Perfection." Tomoe whispered as he dropped to his knees, Y/n squealing as he ran his hands along her thighs before holding her right leg up and throwing it over his shoulder, his nose nuzzling against her inner thigh as he inhaled.

"You do not understand how hard it is to deny myself this pleasure everytime i smell your arousal, it is constant torture Y/n. To see you squirm, to hear your heart beating so fast i worry you'll faint but worst of all, it's the sweet smell that seems to taunt me. It is divine." Y/n let out a moan as he leant forward, his tongue sweeping across her clit as one of her hands came to grip his hair whilst his other hand held hers beside her waist, forcing her to arch her back and push her pussy into his mouth.

"T-Tomoe." Y/n stuttered out, breathless as she looked down with half lidded eyes, his eyes piercing into hers as he continued to swipe his tongue across her clit, enjoying how her body twitched with each movement of his tongue. He was a man starved, a feral fox and not even the most powerful God could pull him from between her legs in that moment. Y/n's eyes closed as she bit her lip, head bumping the door as she arched further into him, his tongue now finding it's rhythm as she panted at each figure of eight he created. Her nails digging into his head as she squirmed. Tomoe moaned against her clit as he ran a hand along her thigh that rest next to his head, nails scraping the vulnerable flesh as he sucked on her clit enjoying how she jumped and moaned loudly.

"Tomoe." The moan, his name, her taste, God's he was done for. Moving his hand along her thigh he curved it around her thigh under he could glide a clawed finger along her pussy, listening to her gasp at the coolness of his finger tip as he moved his mouth down allowing his fingers to play with her clit as he pushed his tongue in and out her pussy.

"You are being such a good girl for me Y/n." Tomoe moaned out, rubbing his fingers quicker as he matched the pace with his tongue, her hands clenching harder in his hair as she panted out his name. Tomoe wanted so badly to push his fingers into her pussy but his claws would hurt her too much and he never wanted to change the pleasure to pain unless she asked. Y/n whimpered as she threw back her head and moaned his name, barely able to open her eyes as she chased her orgasm, Tomoe lapping at her pussy as he held himself back.

"Tomoe, i..i feel funny." Y/n whispered as her eyes barely cracked open to see Tomoe grinning between her thighs as he removed his finger and sucked harshly on her clit, Y/n crying out as she came hard. Tomoe helping her ride out the orgasm as he continued his torment, his hand now pushing her thighs open to keep his head between them. Y/n tried to push him away as she moaned and cried out, her pussy clenching around nothing as she whimpered his name. It felt so amazing yet she felt like her pussy was going to explode if he didn't stop, Tomoe sucked harshly once more as Y/n yelped out making him grin against her leg as he pulled away and watched her. Her hair stuck to her forehead as she panted, eyes blank as Tomoe placed her leg down, his hands holding her hips as he held her up.

"Y/n." Tomoe spoke softly, bringing her attention to him as she nodded, mouth slightly open as she breathed in and out, chest rising and falling as her nipples grazed his kimono making her sigh out another moan at the stimulation. Eyes closing as she leant against the door, Tomoe looking her over before removing his Kimono, his trousers underneath covering his lower half as he draped it over her, Y/n inhaling his scent as she fell forward into his arms.

"You did so well. Try to get some rest." Y/n nodded as Tomoe picked her up, carrying her to his bedroom as he laid beside her, curling into her body whilst she fell asleep.

Mizuki laid with his face against the floor, tears flowing from his eyes.

"Is Lady Y/n okay? Is Tomoe hurting her?" The spirits asked eyes filled with concern as Mizuki raised his head.

"No...he is not hurting her." Mizuki dropped his head again as he continued to cry.

Hey guys, i'm not properly out of my slump but atleast it's something right?

[hoshifighting]

Code of temptation

Synopsis: When a series of cyber threats puts national security at risk, Y/N is assigned to lead the investigation. Her team is complemented by Vernon, a computer genius known for his dexterity in deciphering the most complex codes.

Words: +1k

Reader! SecretAgent x Vernon! Hacker

Warnings: Smut, oral (f. receiving), penetrative sex, exhibitionism, unprotected sex (wrap it up), dry humping, fingering, hair pulling, chocking, dirty talk and etc.

Your tight TechWear is starting to get uncomfortable, your fingers attached to the trigger, and your arms are already weak from holding the heavy gun, one wrong movement, everything is done. You wait for the sign from Mingyu, who is already in position to catch the target “1, 2, 3… Now!” he says in the little point of sound in your ear, and you do your shot.

The bullet hits the target directly in the head, and Mingyu runs in the middle of the basement to steal the small device that is the pivot of the mission you have been working on for the last few weeks. The both of you run to the back door, you enter the armored car that awaits you. 

“Objective accomplished successfully, mission completed with distinction and mastery.” Your chief says on the other line. Body finally relaxing on the car seat, while you do a little weak punch on Mingyu’s hand.

[…]

“We did a great Job Mr. Lee, we trained for this, but it’s difficult ultimately, they are more attached to the systems day by day, so we need to take action, and ask for the Department Head to recruit a Technical Expert, so we can obtain coordinates during missions” you point your pencil on the map in front of you “Promise me that by the end of the month, we will have some ‘technology guru’  to help us, and I promise to complete another mission as always.” that said, you leave the meeting room slamming the door loudly.

[…]

You hold a cup of coffee while you try to decipher the nominal codes on the computer screen, you snort and immediately give up on understanding the logic of the system in front of you. The computer room doorbell rings, and you can see a young man with brown hair waiting for the door to be opened, showing his FBI badge. You put your fingerprint into the system, and the door is slowly opened, revealing the boy, holding the shoulder strap from his backpack, wearing a black uniform, just like yours. 

“First off all, I am almost freaking the fuck out seeing all these algorithms with letters on the same screen” you point to the computer with raised eyebrows, and he closes the door behind him “and we should have met before the mission started, but since you're here now, we need to track them down as quickly as possible.” He agrees and sit on the chair in front of the desk.

“My name is Vernon by the way” the sarcasm is proliferated from his lips, while he maintains an extremely unbothered expression.

You snort incredulous at his audacity - even though the ironic tone in his voice may not have been intentional - you stop to look at him from top to bottom, analyzing his mannerisms until he actually starts doing something on the electronic device that hovers in front of him “very funny of you, but I would like more respect since I am leading this mission, and the hierarchy is very-“

“Oh come on don’t play like you’re 10 years older than me!” He says with the face still buried on the screen “and since you are leading the mission amidst so much cyber invasion, you should at least know how to clear your history, if I were your enemy, and found out that you listen to the same Backstreet Boys song for 9 hours straight, you would definitely no longer be my target, freaky ass girl”

The heels on your feet touches the cold ground towards him “This is an invasion of privacy!” You turn the chair, so now you make eye contact with him, pressing his shoulders on the chair. 

“This is being on the verge of madness!” You let him go, sitting on the couch on the other corner of the room, drinking your coffee ashamed.

The clicks on the mouse and the sound of the keys were driving you crazy, until he lifted his back from the chair and widened his eyes towards the computer, you run to see the screen popping a map with a lot of red ropes interlinked “Fuck! they’re on the building!” You recognize the structure of the department you are hiding in, running to get your guns attached to your waist, while Vernon turns off the trackers “We need to run away right now, we don’t have time!” You hold his arm, and you run through the company halls, until you leave the building, running down the opposite street. You led the way, while Vernon, the shy hacker, tripped over his own legs. The sound of sirens echoed through the streets, mixing with the frenetic rhythm of your footsteps. The cobblestone streets made escape even more challenging.

"Y/N, I think they saw us!", Vernon exclaimed, breathing hard.

You threw a quick glance behind you, displaying a confident grin. "Don't worry, Vernon, I have a foolproof plan." you say with pure sarcasm, and with a quick gesture, you grabbed Vernon's hand and led you into a narrow alley. The space between the two of you is tiny, you can clearly feel Vernon's minty breath hitting your face, the space doesn't help either, as your breasts are pressed against Vernon's chest - he'd be lying if he said he wasn't starting to like it.

The tension in the air was palpable as your eyes met, breathing heavily, you shared a moment of complicity that transcended the imminent danger. You instinctively grabbed Vernon's forearm, running your fingers over the skin still warm from running his eyes revealed a mixture of surprise and expectation, an electrically charged silence filled the narrow alley as your proximity grew. You, who are normally focused and fearless, felt a unique vulnerability at that moment. Then, without words, but with a shared intensity, you leaned slightly towards Vernon. The world around him disappeared when his lips finally touched, an instant of defiant lust in the midst of chaos. The narrow alley became a stage for the beginning of an immense desire between the two of you.

His right hand goes to your neck, pulling your hair, and the other, grab the meat of your ass, you moan in his mouth - you had even forgotten that you had a small beef with him earlier -, your hand goes down until you can fill your hand with his hardened cock, making him stop the kiss to bite his lip “Turn around” he orders. You hardly turn because of the compact space, and now your ass was pressed against his dick, as he pulls your skirt up, massaging your clit over the thin fabric of your panties “More, we don’t have time!” You whisper, and he slaps your cunt “Stop being hasty! Where's your 'foolproof' plan uh?” a high pitched moan leave your mouth, your hands holding on the little bricks of the wall so your face doesn't lie on them.

Vernon pulls your panties to the side, entering his fingers in your cunt, you hump your ass against him, feeling he hiss in your ear, the wet noises from your pussy and the sound of your panting breaths fills the alley, you moan feeling him going faster with his fingers. He suddenly stops the movement, opening his jeans, so he can slide his cock through your folds. “You are so hot, but fuck, you are so annoying!” he pulls your hair, slowly moving his hips finally diving into your heat, your eyes roll at the back of your head, his mouth kissing your neck.

The space was small, but he was doing wonder with his hips, circling his hips so his tip brushes against your g spot, making your legs go numb, you're lucky that he held you tight with an arm around your hip “Such a whore… Tsk” 

You can hear footsteps approaching you, while a light from a flashlight approaches, Vernon pulls you to hide deeper in the alley. 

“I think I heard something coming from here!"

He covers your mouth with one hand as he bites your shoulder, furrowing his eyebrows, still pounding deep inside of you, feeling your juices run down your thighs.

“It must be all in your head, come on, they must have gone that way!”

Vernon pulls you to rest your back against his chest, chocking you, while his hips are working faster “Afraid of being caught hm? So nervous that got you clenching so hard around my cock.” Your mouth opens, as you feel your orgasm approaching, his dirty talk between his moans was driving you crazy, squeezing him, while he throw his head back. “Fuck, I’m cumming” his cock twitches inside of your pussy, shooting ropes of cum inside of you, moaning low in your ear.

You can feel his cum running down your legs, he starts to rub your clit again, so slow it almost burns, his scent invading your nostrils, making your mind go blank, your body begins to tense, and an intense climax makes your legs shake, as he laughs proudly in your ear “Hmm… Thats it! Good girl..” He turns you around, so now you're face to face with him again, his kisses going down your jaw, as he fix your skirt. 

“The night isn't over yet, we still have targets to catch” he gets dressed again “but first, let me clean you up” he bends down, licking your thighs, until he reaches your pussy, holding your leg up on his shoulder, while you tremble sensitive. He stands up, wiping his mouth with his thumb. Vernon steals a kiss from you, before pulling you to run through the streets once again.

[tortillamastersblog]

♕ No Matter What - Part 10 | Lena Luthor ♕

Pairing: Lena Luthor x reader

Warnings: none

Previous Part | Next Part | Masterlist

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The smell of pizza makes my stomach growl as soon as I step out of the shower.

I change into some comfortable clothes, a shirt and some sweatpants, and dry my hair as best as I can with a towel.

Then, I turn off the lights and make my way into the living room where Lena’s already on the couch, eating pizza.

Instead of eating it straight out of the box like a normal person though, she has taken a slice and put it on a small plate, putting it down on the plate every time after she’s taken a bite.

So posh…

I smile and join her wordlessly, taking a slice and biting into it messily. Tomato sauce ends up all around my mouth and Lena chuckles, handing me a napkin to wipe it away.

I thank her and send her a cheeky grin right before diving in for my next bite. It makes her lips twitch adorably and I feel a sense of accomplishment rush through me.

“You know,” I say after swallowing, “You do have your own clothes here now, so there’s no need to steal mine anymore.”

Lena ducks her head shyly and grabs another slice from the box. She’s wearing the hoodie and sweatpants I gave her two nights ago when we she first stayed the night even though we’ve been to her apartment since then to get some of her own stuff.

The police have yet to find out how the security system has been bypassed and until that’s not resolved, she’s staying with me.

“But I like your clothes. They’re baggy and comfortable,” she admits with red ears and I can’t help but nudge her with my foot.

“I’m sure your fancy pajamas are just as– if not even more comfortable than my old army hoodie that’s been through the washer a thousand times,” I tease, referring to the set of silk pajamas I saw in Lena’s closet when I helped her pack some of her stuff.

“Shut up. . .” she mumbles, embarrassed, and I throw my hands up in faux surrender.

“I’m just saying,” I tease before dropping it and going back to eating.

A comfortable silence settles over us and I secretly love how domestic all of this feels. Ever since Lena’s asked me to unzip her dress, things have fundamentally changed between us and almost every glance we share feels charged.

She is still my boss though, which makes me hesitant every time she’s close by.

My phone vibrates on the coffee table and I lean forward mid-bite to see what the notification says. It’s just a thunderstorm warning from my weather app, so I lean back to continue eating.

Lena’s eyes stay on my phone though and when I’m about to ask what’s going on, she points at it and carefully asks, “Is that your brother?”

I pick the phone back up and turn on the screen, seeing the familiar picture of Noah, Harper and I on the beach two years ago.

I smile sadly and nod. “Yeah, that’s Noah.”

Lena’s soft eyes find mine and when she sees that I’m not about to shut down, she points at Harper. “And who’s this?”

Harper is kissing Noah’s cheek in the picture and I’m behind them, pulling a funny face.

“That’s Harper,” I explain calmly. To my surprise I’m not getting choked up and I also don’t feel grief pulling at my insides like I normally do when I talk about them. “She is— was my brother’s fiancée.”

Lena’s eyebrows furrow and she puts her plate on the coffee table, burying her hands in her lap. “Is she. . .”

Dead?

I know that that is what she wants to ask, so I shake my head. “No, she’s fine. We—“I pause and scratch at my eyebrow—“ had a bit of a falling out after his death though.”

Lena nods and watches me carefully for a reaction. Her head is slightly tilted and her pupils are blown in the low light.

There’s really no point in not telling her the whole story now, not when she’s looking at me like that, so I swallow that last piece of pizza before leaning back into the cushions, pulling one of my legs up to my chest.

“She did try to contact me a couple of days ago, saying she was sorry for shutting me out and not saying anything when my dad blamed me for Noah’s death, but I don’t think I’m ready to deal with all of that just yet,” I admit quietly, my eyes trained on my index finger drawing random shapes onto my knee.

Lena hums encouragingly and pulls her own legs onto the couch so she’s sitting on them.

“W-we got pinned by some rebels during a routine supply run and Noah went against my direct orders to stay put after I got shot in the shoulder when I tried to get to the radio in our truck.”

I take a shaky breath and look up to find Lena watching me with sympathy, not pity, which makes all the difference. I hate it when people pity me because it makes them treat me differently.

“My dad—When we got back after Noah’s death. . . He said I could have done more. Should have done more even though there was nothing I could do.

“He blames me for his death and sometimes I have the feeling that he’d rather it have been m-me who died.”

That last part comes out in a broken whisper and Lena reaches for the hand on my knee, lacing our fingers together with a determined look.

“Hey, no, don’t think that,“ she states with a squeeze to my hand. “It wasn’t your fault and your dad is horrible for making you feel that way.”

I scoff and aggressively wipe at a tear that somehow managed to escape my eye.

“I’m seriously,” Lena insists, tugging on our interlaced hands to get me to look at her. “I’m glad you’re alive and even though I didn’t know him, I’m sure Noah would be glad too.”

I smile warily, acutely aware of the pain currently displayed on my face. I usually hate people seeing me like this, but Lena is so calm and understanding about it, it makes me want to be vulnerable.

Lena lifts our intertwined hands and press a featherlight kiss to my knuckles. My skin tingles where her lips made contact and I have to drop my chin hide the blush on my neck.

“Thank you for telling me,” she whispers a moment later. “And thank you for not quitting. I honestly don’t know what I’d without you.”

I clear my throat and try my best to smile when I look up. There’s not much I can think of saying right now so I fold my leg underneath myself and suggest we watch a movie.

Lena agrees easily and moves closer, leaning into my side as I turn on the TV. It’s a move so natural by now, it barely fazes me anymore and I squeeze her hand which is still intertwined with my own.

I sigh and open my eyes, looking around the dark living room to find what woke me up.

The digital clock on the oven reads 3 AM and I sit up, pushing the thin blanket off me.

Lena and I went to bed hours ago after I noticed her tired glossed over eyes. It didn’t take much convincing for her to take the bed once again which I an grateful for.

The couch works just fine for me and it’s honestly not that uncomfortable considering I’ve slept on the ground countless times while overseas with only a rock as my pillow and a jacket as a blanket.

I get up and make sure the door is still locked, whipping around the next second when I hear a whimper coming from the bedroom.

I immediately rush across the living room, grabbing my service weapon on the way before I push open the door to the bedroom.

Blood is pumping in my ears and my hands are shaking when I look around, but there’s no one here except Lena who’s still fast asleep on the bed.

I lower my gun when another whimper leaves her lips and that’s when I realize she’s having a nightmare.

Her eyebrows are scrunched and her breathing is erratic, a sheen of sweat glistening on her forehead.

Sympathy washes over me and I take a seat at the edge of the bed after putting the gun on the nightstand. I placing a hand on her shoulder to wake her gently, only to jump in surprise when she shoots up with wide eyes as soon as my hand makes contact.

“Hey, hey, hey. You’re okay,” I say, squeezing her shoulder. “It was just a dream.”

Lena’s twists to look at me and once she realizes what happened, tears fill her eyes and she throws her arms around my neck.

“You’re okay,” she whispers against my neck. “You’re okay. . .”

“I— Yeah, I’m fine,” I stutter, letting her pull me down onto the bed.

What the hell was she dreaming about?

Lena lets out a shaky breath and moves us around so her head is on my chest and her arms are wrapped around my stomach.

The proximity once again makes my skin tingle and the thought she’s still your boss, YN, is the only reason why I don’t kiss the top of her head.

I do however warp my arms around her and hold her close, ignoring the way my heart flutters when she buries her face in the fabric of my shirt.

“Are you okay? Do you want to talk about it?” I whisper against her temple.

She shakes her head and sighs.

I run my hand up and down her back, feeling bad that she’s going through this. I’ve had my fair share of nightmares and I know how triggering they can be.

“Is there anything I can do?” I offer and for a moment I don’t think she’s going to say anything, but then her small voice cuts through the silence.

“Can you stay?”

My breath hitches and just to be sure I’m actually understanding what she wants, I ask, “You mean here? In bed. . . with you?”

A nod against my chest is all I get in response and I’m sure by now Lena can hear how fast my heart is beating.

“I— Yeah, alright,” I manage to choke out and it’s all it takes for her to reach down and pull the comforter over the two of us.

“Thank you,” she mumbles and by the sounds of it she’s already half-asleep again.

A few minutes later her breathing evens out and her grip around my middle loosens and I let out a deep breath.

She’s still your boss. . . She’s still your boss. . . She’s still your BOSS! I remind myself over and over again, watching as her back rises and falls with each breath she takes.

Her lips are slightly pursed and there’s a faint crinkle between her eyebrows but other than that she looks fairly peaceful.

It’s a breathtaking sight and as I study her a pang of realization hits me in the chest.

I think I’m falling in love with you. . .

Following my realization, I sneak out of bed the next morning as soon as I wake up. It proves to be quite difficult to get out of Lena’s grasp, but once I’m free I quickly jump in the shower and put on some clothes, pent on grabbing some breakfast at a nearby bakery.

It’ll allow me to get away from Lena for a bit and help me process what happened last night. Well, not just last night, I guess, this has been in the making for a couple of weeks now, but last night was the first time it actually hit me what’s actually going on.

I take one last look at Lena’s sleeping form before slipping out of the apartment.

I don’t worry about anything happening while I’m gone because it’s still early and no one except Sam knows where she’s staying.

I pull my hood up against the drizzle outside, knowing (thanks to the weather app on my phone) that that drizzle will soon turn into a heavy storm.

It’s no problem though because Lena’s decided to work from home today and it will give me a chance to catch up on some paperwork I’ve been meaning to do for the gym I used to teach self defense classes at.

It’s something I’ve put on hold since I started working for Lena, but I still help out with organizing class schedules every now and then.

I get to the bakery fifteen minutes after opening time and to my surprise there are already people there.

I take off my hood as soon as I step inside an go to stand at the end of the queue that has already formed. The smell of freshly baked bread and pastries has my mouth watering and I pull out my wallet to be ready to pay as soon as it’s my turn.

I’m so lost in my own thoughts (which are mostly thoughts of Lena) that I flinch when someone taps my shoulder.

I turn around warily to see what it is a stranger could possibly want from me at this time of the morning, only to go slack-jawed when that person happens to be none other than Harper.

She’s dressed in running gear and I curse myself for not remembering that it is her every day routine to stop by this exact place after her morning run whenever she’s not on tour.

She seems to be equally surprised to see me even though she’s the one who tapped me on the shoulder and for a moment neither one of us says something.

“H-hi,” she manages to get out as the queue starts moving. “When I came in and saw you I didn’t think that it was actually you, but I had to know, you know. . . Because it’s been a while and will you look at that. . . It is you. I— Wow, I’m honestly not sure what I was thinking, I’m sorry. I know you’re not ready to talk yet, but—“

I lift a hand to stop her, which only seems to make her even more nervous, so I smile reassuringly and say, “It’s fine, Harper.”

She grimaces and drops her chin for a moment. “Right, sorry.”

I must admit, what happened between us will not be forgotten for a long time, but seeing her act likes this when we were once so close makes me take pity on her.

“No, really, it’s okay,” I say. “How are you? It’s been a while.”

Harper brushes a strand of sweaty blonde hair off her forehead, which I remember is a nervous tick of hers, and nods thoughtfully. “Honestly, I’ve been better, but I’m keeping myself busy. How are you?”

The queue moves again and I make sure to move with it.

“I’m hanging in there,” I say honestly and when Harper’s eyes meet mine I smile sadly.

She hums in understanding and we go back to being silent for a while. When it’s almost my turn to order, she touches my arm to regain my attention.

“I meant what I said on the phone,” she says earnestly. “I’m sorry for what happened, and I don’t blame you for Noah’s death.”

I suck in a sharp breath and scratch the back of my neck. “Yeah, okay. . .”

“No, I’m serious, Y/N,” she persists and squeezes my forearm. “I’m sorry and I want to make things right. I miss you.“

I take in the vulnerability that’s written all over her face and sigh.

I’ve missed her, too. She was like a sister to me before Noah’s death and to say that I didn’t miss her would be a straight up lie. Yes, she shut me out and it made me feel like shit for a long time, but she was grieving and so was I.

I’m next in line to order, so I take her hand off my forearm (not entirely comfortable with her touch just yet) and squeeze her hand before letting go. “How about we grab some coffee next week, yeah? That way we can talk properly.”

Harper nods and brushes another strand of hair from her face. “Yeah, alright. Text me. I’m free whenever.”

I send her one last tight-lipped smile before turning around and ordering.

The woman behind the register hands me my food a few moments later and I take it and leave without looking back.

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Next part is where it’s at, people. . . Just sayin’ ;)

Tag list: @nerethos @orange15quote @nuianced-tck-enby @autorasexy @unexpected-character

PSA for everyone who wants to be tagged: Please make sure your blog isn’t hidden because if it is I can’t tag you. . .

[lynnbanks]

Jet lag and brunch

(Would like to add this before you read that y/n (ivy) has Pernicious anemia and you will probably more about it in later stories. I would also like to add I'm not completely sure what this is just wanted to get it out there if there are any mistakes let me know hope you enjoy)

Our first morning/afternoon back at the lake house and if we don't hurry we will be late to brunch with luke parents and jack

Luke is still pretty jet-lagged so he is struggling to get up. “ lukey it is time to get up,” I say while rubbing his bare back long forgotten where his shirt and pants were the second we got to our room at the lake house before crashing onto the bed taking me with him.

“Lay with me for a second please.” we don't have time but I indulge already having myself ready knowing he would likely brush his teeth put on anything he can find at the top of his unpacked suitcase with a hat and be out the door.

“ ok sleepy butt we have 20 minutes to be out the door so in five minutes you need to be up and getting ready” he dismissed me by pulling me into bed with him and onto his chest mumbling “You smell good baby” voice still deep and gravely from sleeping 10 hours straight “ hmm thank you” while I run my fingers through his unruly curls “you ready to eat” I ask in a whisper as to not disturb the calm air around us seeing as we haven’t had a lot of alone time in awhile with all the crazy schedules “mmh yes very ready” “ok then let’s get this show on the road.”

Jack meets us downstairs and we all loaded up into the car, Quinn won’t be in till next week and we will probably do a fancy dinner to celebrate all of us being together and all the boys have accomplished this year.

When we get to the restaurant we meet up with Jim and Ellen in the parking lot, before we go in give a hug to both me and Luke after not seeing us for a while, we walk in and the conversation starts flowing.

Luke has his hand running up and down my leg, with the occasional squeeze, we talk about what we want to eat and enjoy each other's company, our server comes and takes our order not without giving Jack a few long stares and some flirty giggles, while we wait for our food I scoot closer to Luke and lay my head on his shoulder while he wraps his arm around me and kisses my head

“ y/n when are you free next maybe we can go get our nails done for the start of summer” “ I am free Sunday I was also thinking of getting my hair cut and finding a new swimsuit along with the other things we will need for the house we could make a day of it” luke perks up “ you have infusions tomorrow baby you should probably take it slow; don't worry about the other stuff I've got the rest.”

Luke gave me a soft squeeze on the arm to let me know he was still there with me, and all I can think now as I look up at him and smile is I love him. The rest of lunch goes pretty well me and Ellen walk out arm and arm talking about the rest of the details for our “girls’ day”. Me and Ellen have always been very close so I am looking forward to it

when I get to my car Luke is holding the door open and before I get in he pulls me into his body and gives me a soft kiss on the lips his constant need to touch me has always been something I love about him my little luv bug; instead of pulling away fully I lay my head on his chest and look up at him “Hmm I love you” he smiled “ oh really well I am IN love with you so” I laugh “ stop being so competitive Warren”

Back at the house Luke and I decide a nap would be how we spend the rest of the afternoon, so we make our way to one of the larger hammocks we had put in last year for this exact reason.

As I lay with half of my body on top of Luke he plays with the fingers on the hand that isn't playing with his curls we talk about nothing and everything; conversation had always been so easy for us never seeming to get tired of what the other has to say.

“I have missed this with you,” Luke says softly almost like he is saying it to himself; still very tired from the time change and travel that comes with the job on top of all the physical parts of the game.

I just want to rap him up and keep him in my pocket “Well you are about to see a whole lot more of me so be prepared to get sick of me” I say with a slight chuckle “ I don't think I will ever get tired of you” he says with a smile in his voice “ glad to hear it warren”

[flowery-mess]

Swan Lake

Noah x ballerina reader

I will never forget the way I was feeling at that stage in front of all those people. My parents and siblings in first row, watching me with eyes full of tears and pride. I got the lead role in Swan Lake at the age of 16 which was seen as big accomplishment in ballet world. In that moment I felt happy, proud of myself and stronger than ever. But that didn’t last long.

Just a seconds after the big red curtain was closed and me and other dancers went in the direction of our changing room, I heard my name being called. Screamed, actually.

I turned around to see our trainer speed walking to me. I quickly went over the whole play in my head. What did I do wrong? I couldn’t think of anything, I felt good. She found million reasons to tell me I was a bad choice for playing the lead role, that I’m too fat and I won’t play on the next date.

That was it. That night I told my parents I’m done with ballet and I’m quitting immediately. My mother was ballet dancer too, we talked a lot about how hard it was for me lately, so she agreed with my decision and went to talk to my trainer. I packed my things and never saw that woman again. That felt like a big rock fell off my shoulders. That was 10 years ago.

-

“What are you thinking about?” Noah asked, his hand gently placed on my thigh as we were driving to my family home for Saturday lunch with my family.

“It’s 10 years anniversary of me ending my ballet career. I was thinking about it a lot recently.”

“Thinking about as?” he waited for my response as he didn’t really understand how I feel about it.

“As I miss it, I guess. I was thinking about talking with my mom about it today. Also I looked up some ballet classes in our area. But I don’t know, it was just a silly idea.” I shrugged it off.

I never really talked with Noah about my ballet career. I told him I did ballet for 14 years and quit for mental health issues. I mean, it’s very much known how the ballet industry works, so he understood. I have very mixed feelings about getting back into it at my age, so I haven’t told anyone yet.

I tried to stay healthy and fit, I sometimes go to open dance classes and sometimes I try some ballet steps. I still got it. I am a lucky one, I still have good stretches and I learn steps quickly. I just got bored of doing it only in our living room.

“Really? That’s not a silly idea, it’s actually a really cool idea. Did you find any good places?” I was surprised with Noah’s excitement. He is very supportive of everything I do, but I guess I expected different reaction.

“I like two ballet studios. They have some good teachers and also open classes, just for hobby attendance. One is on Mondays and the other one is on Thursdays, so I can try both and then see which one I like more.”

“Are you signed up already?”

“No, I am not sure Noah. It brings up lot of bad memories, 10 years ago it got me into a really bad place and I’m scared it’s going to be the same this time.” I felt tears coming as I thought of little 13 years old me crying through the whole night, because I was told I’m fat for ballet. That I’m not good enough. That I’m too tall to be a ballerina. That my skin is too pale. That I got in just because of my mother. That I’m never going to make it.

Those memories make me feel little and so vulnerable.

“I’m sure it will be great honey. If you miss it, then you should try it. But it’s your decision, okay? I don’t want to push you into anything. Take your time to think about it, talk with your mom and you will see what’s her opinion on this, right?” he brought his hand that was holding mine in it to his lips and placed small kisses against my palm.

“Thank you.” I shot him a smile which he gladly returned.

-

I loved days like today, spending time with my family. All of them love Noah, so after we have lunch, we are usually both separated and have conversation with someone else. Firstly, I talked to my siblings about college and their new internships, while Noah talked with my dad about new music and their upcoming Europe tour. My dad absolutely loves Bad omens and I am sure he is their biggest fan. When my family visits for shows, he never wants to be in the backstage, watching the show from safe space. He always goes in the crowd, which makes my mum crazy scared every single time.

I used this as a chance to talk to mom about the ballet thing that was going around in my head.

“Mom do you mind coming with me outside for a minute?”

“Of course darling.”

We took our coffees with us as we made our way to the garden and sit on the big couch that my parents had there for my whole life. That thing is going to outlive all of us.

“What is it darling?”

“What do you mean?” I tried to hide my worries, but my mom knows me too well.

“I know when my baby is worried about something. What is it? Is it Noah? Are you sad he’s going to leave for tour soon?”

“Oh no, well, yes that too, but it’s not the first time, that will be okay. It’s something I wanted to talk about especially with you.” I played with the cup in my hands and avoided the topic as long as I could.

“Come on hon, spit it out.”

“I was thinking about getting back into ballet.” I said and kept my eyes low, focused on the green grass. I looked up just because my mom wasn’t saying anything. “What? Are you going to say something? I don’t know what this face means.” I was honestly so confused with the way her face was looking at me. Was she happy about? Sad? I couldn’t tell.

“Well, I was expecting this much sooner than now.”

“What?”

“I always thought you will want to get back to it at some point in your life hon. You loved it. Aside from those ugly things, you loved ballet. I was so angry at that woman who ruined for you.”

“Why did you never say anything?” I was so confused. She was waiting for this for years and never talked about it with me?

“Because it’s your decision, not mine. I didn’t want you to think I was disappointed with you or pushing you back into it. Did you think of where would you start with classes? And would you want to take part in plays again?” She was right. It is just mine decision and with everything she saw me go through I understand she was worried.

“I found two studios near our home that look good. They have weekly open classes that I was thinking about. But I wanted to talk with you first about it.”

Then we fell into long dialogue about everything connected with be going back into ballet. My mom gave me a courage to at least try it. She said my eyes lit up when I talked about the good memories I had from my child age. She also told me that I am more mature than I was back then and even if I don’t think I can handle it, I can. And she was right.

I’m a grown woman now, I can handle myself and protect myself. It’s also just open class for everyone who wants to try ballet, there will be no judgement.

-

“I’m going to try it.” We left my parents house later than expected, so it was dark outside when we were driving back.

“The open classes? Did you talk with your mom about it?”

“Yes and she said I should give it a chance. So I guess I won’t be home on Monday evening.”

“Can I go watch you?” Noah asked.

“What?” I returned him a question, not knowing what he meant.

“I mean I never saw you do your ballet thing and you will be wearing those ballet outfits and I’m sure that will be hot.” He said as if it was obvious fact that I should’ve known.

“You’re not being serious right now, are you?” I tried to hold my laugh in at his innocent clueless face.

“Well I’m not, but I would really like to see your little ballet outfit for sure.” He turned his face to you so you could see his smirk.

“Sure, watch the road you perv.”

-

It had already been a month since I started going to open classes in the studio I chose after the first week. I chose the one closer to our home, their dance rooms were bigger and more modern and our teacher was a lovely girl, possibly my age.

And it felt amazing. It felt like I was alive again. Don’t get me wrong I loved my life with Noah, my work and everything, but this felt like the missing piece.

While I was changing into my clothes after today’s class, our teacher Molly came to talk to me.

“Listen Y/N, I know you said you have bad experience and memories with professional ballet, but we have few spots open in our semi professional group and I thought you’d be great candidate. I see you’re learning faster than anyone in your class and I’m scared you would get bored after a while. There will be auditions, but I can get a word in for you and see if you could skip them. Just think about it and let me know as soon as you decide please.”

That night I came running home to share that news with Noah.

“WHERE ARE YOU?” I screamed just seconds after I opened the door.

“Studio.”

When I opened the door Noah turned in his chair to face me.

“Did I do something?” he looked scared.

“What?”

“Why are you screaming and running, I’m scared I did something.” You let out a chuckle at his words.

“No, but I got news. Great news.”

“Let me hear them.”  I walked over to him and sat in his lap.

“I just got offered a place in semi professional group at the studio. Without auditions, Molly wants me there.”

“Honey that’s great news! That’s amazing news!” he stood up with me in his arms and spined us around.

“So you think I should accept that offer?”

“You haven’t already?”

“No, I wanted to think about it.”

“Judging by your reaction, there’s nothing to think about.” He smiled into our kiss.

“I guess I’m back on track then.” I kissed him back.

-

Long story short, I accepted Molly’s offer and started with my new group. I had classes 4 times a week, which was bit hard to get used to, but after while it was okay.

Noah left for tour, so at least I got something to do with my free time.

Noah leaving was also good for another reason. There is time difference between us, so we usually text each other or have short calls, so my worries are easy to hide.

Last week Molly told us that our group will be playing Swan Lake few months from now on, which brought back some memories. Semi professional groups still play in midsized theatre, I joined them when there wasn’t any, so I expected some play to come soon, but not this one.

I had mixed feelings about it, thinking if I want to play or if I just pass this one. Applications are closing in three days and I still haven’t applied for any role, which was weird for Molly.

She asked me about it after last class, so I told her about my ballet history, how Swan Lake basically ruined it for me. Molly is very positive person, so she told me something that got stuck in my head. She said I could take it as an opportunity and change Swan Lake from something bad to something really good in my life.

Truth is, I am thinking about applying for Odette/Odile, but I haven’t told anyone yet.

-

“Okay that’s enough love, what is going on?” Noah asked through the phone and I saw his forehead wrinkles were making his worried face. It’s scary how well he knows me, but with tomorrow being the last day for applications I needed to tell him.

“Our group is going to play Swan Lake in a few months and I don’t know if I should apply or not. It’s the play that made me quit.”

“Looks like it’s your second chance to make the best out of it. Listen, you were worried about even getting into ballet again and look at you now! I know you’re worried now, but wouldn’t you regret not even trying it?” I felt like I was on the phone with Molly right now.

“I know, I was thinking about applying for the lead role, I did it back then too. But maybe I should do other role?”

“Oh no love, if anyone is supposed to be the lead role in this play, it’s you.”

“You have to say this, you’re my boyfriend Noah.”

“Well wouldn’t you be the same if I was in your position? That’s what you do for your partner. You know how many songs would be forgotten and never released if you didn’t support me? There is lot of them I thought weren’t good enough, but you made me finish them. I may don’t understand ballet, but I understand you and I know you would regret not applying. So you get your ass up right now and fill what ever you need to fill and send it to Molly or I’m going to do it.”

And he was right, I would regret it. But I still couldn’t believe myself when I saw ‘send’ on my screen after I applied for Odette/Odile.

-

Molly informed me that me and 5 other girls applied for the same role, so there will be two rounds of auditions, first one starting on Monday, which gives me 6 days to prepare for it. Noah is also coming back home on Monday, so I’m happy I will share the outcome with him. Either we will celebrate or he will make me his comfort food and I’m happy with both options.

-

I spend the last 6 days going over the choreography for the first round of auditions. Everyday after work I went straight home and practiced. Last night I didn’t get a chance to talk with Noah, because he was already on his way back to the states. I at least talked to my mom this morning.

“Y/N you’re next.” I heard Molly from the ballet room.

-

“I’m homeee.” I heard Noahs voice that I missed so much. I left the pans on low heat and left kitchen to meet Noah in the living room.

I didn’t waste any time and went straight in for a kiss.

“Missed me much?” he managed to say between our kisses.

“Very much.” I looked at his face, tired face, and held it in my hands “Hi love.”

“Hi.” He leaned his forehead against mine as we enjoyed bit of silence and each other’s presence after month and two weeks apart.

“How was the flight?” I broke the silence, took his hand and led him into our kitchen to finish dinner.

“It was okay. I slept most of the time, but I’m still very tired. And I need a shower.”

“You can go take a shower now, it will take few more minutes until it’s done.” I pointed to the food.

“Okay.” Noah got up, left kiss on my nose and went to get shower. That’s what I thought at least. On his way to our bathroom, he realized I didn’t tell him about the audition.

“Y/N? Wasn’t the audition today?” it was, but I wanted to tell him about the result over dinner.

“It was, but I wanted to tell you later.” I tried to hide the smile on my face.

“You got through to the second audition, didn’t you?” he caught your smile and immediately knew the answer. “I guess we can celebrate right now in the shower huh? Are you going to join me?”

-

“So girls, I want to thank you for participating in this audition. It was hard to decide, but in the end, we agreed on one name. And it’s you, Y/N. We were amazed by your performance and we feel like your experience with this play could help us to make the best of it. Congratulations!” Molly gave me a hug and whispered in my ear that she knew it was going to be me from the beginning.

Noah and my mom said the same. My mom made sure she put date of the premiere in hers and dad’s calendar so they wouldn’t miss it. Noah also made sure to clear that day months in advance and welcomed me home with a flower and dinner as a celebration.

-

Breathe in, breathe out. And repeat. I stood in backstage already in my costume. I saw Noah and my parents in the first row as the rest of the room filled with strangers. Strangers that are going to be watching me in a few minutes.

“Are you ready Y/N? How are you feeling?” I felt Molly’s hand on my shoulder.

“I’m nervous, but also excited. I haven’t preformed for over decade, so I hope I don’t panic.”

“You’ll be great. We did lot of work, all of you will do great tonight.”

She then went to talk to other girls and I felt my phone buzz in my hand. It was Noah.

“Don’t be nervous, we’re very excited to see you shine tonight. You’ll kill it babe, I love you.” Oh my sweet Noah. Supportive as always.

-

I stood still in my pose as the curtain was closing. I let out a big breath I didn’t even realised I was holding in when the curtain was fully closed. I turned around to see my friends and in that moment we realized we just finished our premiere of the Swan Lake. And it was perfect. We did group hug, with Molly joining us. It was completely different than 10 years ago. This night was full of support and love.

I went to change into my normal clothes and then to meet Noah and my parents.

My dad and Noah both had bouquets in their hands and my mom had tears in her eyes. She was also the first one to pull me into a hug.

“I’m so proud of you Y/N, you can’t even imagine. You grew up into a beautiful woman and you just showed me how strong you are.”

“Thank you, mom, I couldn’t have done this without you.”

Then it was my dad who pulled me into strong hug. My dad didn’t show emotions a lot, so I appreciated him coming tonight.

I really wanted to literally jump into Noah’s arms, but I kept calm in front of my parents. They said their goodbyes and left, because they have long road ahead of them.

As soon as they left the parking lot I turned to Noah and attacked him with hugs and kisses.

“Slow down baby, let me congratulate you and give you this beautiful flower.” It really was beautiful bouquet. Noah always got me beautiful flowers.

“How was it? Did you like it?” I was interested in Noah’s opinion, because it was his first ballet play he saw.

“It was beautiful! You were amazing! I know you can stretch your legs right, but I didn’t know you can stretch them like this.” I didn’t know if I should slap his arm for his stupid comment or laugh at him as he was trying to show me what he meant and trying to do the pose he was referring to.

“Okay ballerina I get it!” I laugh and stopped him from what he was doing before he got himself injured.

“Do you want to go out for dinner and drinks? Or go home and order something? You must be hungry.” We intertwined our hands and Noah led me to his car. He was right, I didn’t eat much today, because of the nerves.

“I think I want to go home, order something to eat, have a glass of wine, have hot bubble bath and then my back could use a massage…”

“I will give you massage only if you let me join you in the bath.” Of course he wouldn’t miss that chance.

“Deal. Let’s get home.” Noah started his car and took my hand in his.

“I love you and I’m so proud of you. I’m getting tickets to every show and I’m making the guys come with me.”

“Okay.” I laughed, but I knew he was serious. I’m sure that at the next show I’m going to see the core of BO crew in the front row.

“But I’m serious, I love you.”

“I love you too Noah, thank you for being by my side for all of this.”

“Always.”

[mp0625]

Game Time

Taglist. Masterlist.

Matthew Tkachuk x Reader

Word count: 1.3k

A/N: LETS GO BOYS!!! I started writing this about four hours ago! Aaaaaaa!!! I finished it just in time!!

A/N pt 2: If y’all want another part let me know!!

“Are you going to the game?”

“Yeah, are you going to the game??”

“Why aren't you at the game? It starts in 10.” The chat on your stream starting to go crazy realizing that you were not going to be at the game to support your boyfriend.

“Hey y’all take a breath.” You say pausing your game mid lap to the protests of your friends who were forced to pause. “Yes, I’m not in Florida, I’m home in Carolina, but Matty understands why I can’t be there.” Panning the camera down to show your two big dogs and then back up. “But I have the next best thing.” You say flipping the camera to show your big Tv and the preshow for game one on. “I haven’t been super into hockey since we got booted in the second round, Matthew understands it and I support him and his team 110 percent to bring home that cup.”

As the minutes ticked down and the game started you had all but abandoned your game and friends. You occasionally said a few words to your stream but your full attention was on the screen behind your computer monitors. As Bobrovsky makes more and more saves, your quiet chanting of Bobby gets louder and louder. When halfway through the second when a fight breaks out your chanting of Bobby changes to “Fight! Fight! Fight!” You turn back to your stream and look at them dead in the camera. “What I’m technically not allowed to fight in games doesn’t mean I can’t tell someone to sock someone else in the face.” You say with a grin. During the second intermission you see a question pop up.

“How do you feel about Necas winning Men’s World?”

“I’m absolutely ecstatic for him! How we lost to the Rangers wasn’t fun, so I’m happy that he got to go win something that big.” As you watch the opening faceoff for the third period, you start to have hope that Matty can do what he and his team tried to accomplish last year. As the minutes tick down Bobby and his boys did it to shut out the Edmonton Oilers.

At your morning phone call with Matthew. He asks. “Y/N why in the hell did you have a 7 hour stream last night.”

“It was my version of a live blog and we had already been streaming for 4 hours before the game and they asked why I wasn’t at the game cheering you on so I showed them I had the Tv on.”

“Y’all ready for game 2? You ask the stream as you finish tidying up the room waiting for the game to start. Nothing major happens in the first half of the first period. When halfway through Edmonton gets the first goal. “Come on!!” It takes until the second half of the second to have Florida score. “Thank you Mr. Mikkola!” As you wait for the third you make the mistake of saying it’s been a slow game. 3 minutes into the third Rodrigues gets the goal that puts them ahead of the Oilers. Then 9 minutes later on the powerplay he gets another goal to make it 3 to 1. “I love you EROD!!” The last goal of the game came with 3 minutes left from Ekblad. At the end of the game you sit back in your chair with a big sigh. “That was a very stressful game. See y’all in 2 days.”

“It’s game 3 and I don’t know how I feel about this, it feels like it’s going too smoothly. We will see how this goes.” The game starts out slow. It takes until 2 minutes left in the first for someone to score first. “Thank you Mr. Reinheart!!!” A minute into the second Edmonton gets the goal and is starting to push back. But Florida retaliates 8 minutes later with Mr. Tarasenko put them back up one. Then 4 minutes later with 2 back to back goals to bring them up 4 to 1. “Thank you!!!!! One more period left we got this!” 6 minutes into the third Edmonton pushes back to make 4 to 2. “Come on!! That was stupid.” 8 minutes later Edmonton pushes back again to make it 4 to 3. “That was a scary close game, I’m slightly scared for game 4.”

“Welcome back to your favorite hockey player and streamer live blog of the Stanley cup finals. Will the Panthers be able to sweep the Edmonton Oilers? We will see tonight! The Florida Panther’s are the visiting team to Edmonton Oilers home Arena Rogers Place. We will see if the boys can do it tonight!” You say turning on your camera so the viewers can see your Panthers jersey. “The Tv is on and it is time.” As the first period rolls by with no penalties or goals. As the second is starting, you whisper under your breath. “Come on Matty!” At the opening face off the puck goes straight to Matthew and he starts going down the ice as hard as he can. “Brakeaway! Brakeaway! Brakeaway!” As Matthew makes it to the net with the puck in hand Skinner is readying himself but where he thinks Matthew is he isn’t, and he gets the first goal of the game. “Yes! Yes! Yes! Thank everything!” You sit back in your gaming chair with a sigh. “Elle.” You call to the chocolate lab that is dead asleep in her bed unaware of what just happened. “Your daddy just got a goal!” Hearing her daddy’s name she starts wagging her tail. The first goal is the one that broke the dam. Matthew drew a penalty on Draisaitl which gave the Panthers the power play they need to get the next goal by their captain, the one Aleksander Barkow. “Barky!” When back at even strength they lose the puck in the Panthers zone and no one sees it slid in behind Bobrovsky. “Oh come on you got to be kidding me!” As time runs out on the clock for the second. You take a sip of your drink and sigh. “That was an interesting period, at least we are leading!” As you wait anxiously for the third to start, you see messages of excitement and hope roll across the stream’s chat.

“They got this!”

“I believe in them!”

“They do have this! Let’s go boys!” You end with a shout. At the start of the third you are nervous they could sweep or lose and win it at home. Five minutes into the third. A one mister Evan Rodrigues get not one but two goals back to back within 30 seconds of each other. “Yesss, EROD!!!” After the second goal, the fourth of the game you could tell Skinner was super rattled. You knew as time ticked down you knew the win was imminent. With 10 seconds left in one last ditch try the Oilers pull Skinner and send out Conner McDavid as he’s skating and picks up the puck he slams it back and it just slips in over Bobrovsky shoulder. “Come on!” You stand up and slam your hands on your desk. But the Oiler last ditch effort wasn’t enough to stop the Panthers as the final few seconds tick off, the boys start gathering. They did it the first cup in 30 years of the team and what they worked so hard for and almost touched last year. “Yessssss!! Thank you!!” You scream and jump up from your chair. “Sorry to leave so quickly, but there are a few people I need to call.” You pull out your phone and Text Matty. “YOU DID IT I'M SO SO PROUD OF YOU!!! WE ALL ARE!!” As you send it you include a picture of you, Elle, and Jet.

Taglist: @studioreader @honethatty12

@slafgoalskybaby @swissboyhisch

@wondershells @cixrosie

There might be a few I’m forgetting to tag

[agendabymooner]

goodnight n go ! max v. x ofc (hearth sister!ofc)

“it’s bad enough we get along so well.”

summary: there’s a way to make a graduation celebration better than to have her photos taken by the paparazzi, and max verstappen makes sure she remembers that. OR the dutch driver is making it hard for sylvie to dislike him. (1) (2)

content warning: use of explicit language

note: i wrote too much blurbs yesterday of max verstappen.

masterlist

liked by max33verstappen, lewishamilton, tillymarie

comments have been limited

lando.norris proud of you best friend!!!

charles_leclerc congrats sylvie!! (the master debater part isn’t that necessary)

tillymarie so so so proud of you lovie ! keep it up !

Photos were taken left and right by the time her family stepped out of the Sheldonian Theatre. Her black grad gown, she couldn’t wait to take it off. There’s three or five paparazzi that were by the gates, asking to get her photos taken— but she didn’t want to look in their direction, wanting to celebrate her accomplishments with her sisters and her mother after the grueling four years of school. Was she ever thankful that her private school had offered the advancement program. 

She was a graduate at 18– all thanks to the program and the money that her mother had invested into her education. Sylvie was so much like her sisters, but she had gotten into her post secondary education earlier because of her intelligence. Tilly had moved a year up after having herself assessed, but Sylvie… She's the only one who’s managed to get to college early due to the practically perfect marks that she had gotten throughout the years.

“Sylvie, can you just pose with your sisters for a moment?” Her mother begged as she held the digital camera, lens pointing at Sylvie, Stevie and Aimee. “We need a photo to put up in my study.”

“Maman, there’s a lot of paparazzi,” Sylvie whined, stomping her feet lightly. “I’m sure they got something for us.”

“They’ve been told to stay within a certain distance,” Stevie nudged Sylvie. She smiled and murmured, “Now smile. I need some photos to post.”

“I don’t like you,” Sylvie grumbled before her mouth quirked, hearing her mother’s camera clicking. That… and the many clicks of the cameras from the gate did too. It was meant to be a celebration for her family and friends only. It turns out, her life was everyone else’s too. 

Posing for a few more pictures, Blanche Ford finally put the camera down and grinned. “Well, do you want to get your photos taken with your friends?” 

“Already had enough taken earlier, Maman,” Sylvie sighed, “I want to go home and see Soren now.”

She didn’t want to celebrate. The past few weeks were rough. The Spanish GP had taken a toll on her energy and mental wellbeing; the last thing she had wanted to do was host parties or call for celebration. Whatever they had planned for today, that wasn’t her doing.

All she wanted was to see her two week old nephew and retire to bed after. 

But her family had a different plan. She only found out when they made the drive back to Brackley. 

Their home there had been built long before anyone was even born. It was only purchased by Blanche by the time her divorce papers were filed and signed, making it a home for her three daughters. They grew up there, and they didn’t even know that a few minutes from their place was the Mercedes AMG Petronas headquarters. It was funny how that worked because Tilly never really met Toto despite visiting the town. Sylvie still laughed about that. 

The estate was something of a peaceful place. Sylvie loved it there. She made it a goal to spend her Christmas breaks at home seeing as university was only 27 minutes away. Now, not only was she staying there again, but Tilly and Toto moved to another neighborhood that’s only 10 minutes away from their estate. It was an easier commute for Sylvie if she wanted to visit Soren. 

But her thoughts washed away when she opened the front door and heard the screams of, “SURPRISE!”

Sylvie caught the graduation cap that she nearly dropped. What the hell is going on, she asked herself. 

The foyer wasn’t fully decorated but anyone who had never seen the full estate would say otherwise. Balloons that spelled out ‘Congratulations’ were hung up and reflecting due to their metallic appearance. The marble columns by the two spiral staircases were fully wrapped in artificially made hydrangeas and other perennials that made the muted foyer colourful. As if those weren’t enough, the arch leading to the halls were decorated with garlands and flowers, string lights putting a wedding reception to shame because of how warm it made the house’s appearance. 

“You are not supposed to be here,” she finally found her words as she pointed at Toto, who was merely laughing at her bluntness as he approached her with a smile, hugging her as she wrapped her arms as much as she could around him. 

“Congratulations, maus,” Toto grinned, “I’m so proud of you.” 

That party that Tilly and Blanche held for her started there, but the discomfort that she was feeling while she wore her university uniform was unbecoming. So while she was having a conversation with Lando and George, she excused herself for a second to head upstairs and change her clothes. 

Life really was full of surprises, Sylvie told herself hours after she opened the door to her bedroom and found her vanity area cluttered with shopping bags and piles of books. She could have sworn that she hadn’t purchased any books lately, too stressed out to even look at a back synopsis. She also knew that there were some things sent to her by designer houses and brands that were trying to hire her — graduation gifts, her agent told her a day ago. But those gifts were downstairs according to Tilly. So she wasn’t exactly sure where this came from. 

Looking at the corner of her bedroom, however, she moved quickly as she grabbed the blue envelope from the foot tall teddy bear that she swore she never had either. The envelope was addressed to her. Well… it’s addressed to a “B. Mustang” making it easily known to her who had written the content inside. Regardless, she opened the envelope and read the message. 

“Mustang, 

Congratulations on surviving university. I heard it sucks there. I hope you like this bear— I called him McLaren. At least we have something to not argue about, no?

Also I hope you like the gifts I got you. It’s the least I can do. Enjoy your celebration! Wish me luck for the next race.

Love,

O. Cadillac.”

She had never been so frustrated over a man before. She swore. She hated having to see his face at the paddock or the garage but she had never been so angry about appreciating him or liking him. He made it difficult for her to dislike him, she hated that. 

She wanted to toss out the Dior, Cartier and whatever the fuck were dropped off at her bedroom. Everything that came from him, she wanted to throw out. Even McLaren the Teddy Bear. She wanted to despise him so much because of how shitty their history had turned out to become. But it’s not going to work like that anytime soon, she told herself. She was going to work with him one way or another and she’d have to work with him professionally. Clearly hatred didn’t work out for her— she was so grateful for the gifts he had gotten her and she was slowly returning the same feeling that he had.

She told herself that she could stay in her room for another fifteen minutes and looked down at the letter in her hand. With a sigh, she pulled out her phone and began typing. Her right hand typed and searched for his name and the other began to open the little bags first. 

[anogete]

Hi. Update of random shit in case anyone cares.

The scary test I was stressed over in the fall when I was posting my last fic? It was the CFP (Certified Financial Planner) exam. Yes, I passed it. The designation requires a bachelor's degree, so I had to go back to school to finish my last 10 classes. Then I had to take 7 more classes that are pre-reqs for the exam. Then I spent probably 700 hours attempting to cram everything you could think of related to personal finance (my god, there is a metric shit ton) into my head. The designation also requires 5,000 hours of experience in the planning field (which I thankfully already had). By the time I passed the test, I was no longer proud of the accomplishment, just relieved to have it behind me.

Work was intensely busy in November and December. I got little reading and no writing done.

I have a WIP featuring the Darcy/Rumlow pairing that has been languishing on my computer since 2020. To be honest, I've mosty forgotten what the conflict driving the plot was going to be. I think I was trying to tie it into the events of Wandavision. Took place after the show and had Monica Rambeau and Darcy kinda sorta working together and trying to figure out what, if anything, crossing the barrier that Wanda had thrown up did to them. Of course, Rumlow is alive and scarred and back with the good guys. And also really annoyed that his recent gunshot wound stuck him on desk duty watching the nerds complete their physicals as part of employee onboarding. Darcy doesn't want to have gym class with Rumlow, and Rumlow doesn't want to be there either but he's also kinda into the sassy brunette who tried to sweet talk him into passing her without making her run a mile. In the chapter or two I did write, the banter between Darcy and Rumlow was so fun, so I'd love to go back to it and try to move it along.

I got sucked into reading Draco/Hermione fanfic recently. Blame those damn Snow edits from the latest Hunger Games movie. Guys, I have never read those books or seen the movies, but blonde Tom Blyth is looking like the fanfic Draco of my dreams. How dare. This rabbit hole led to me deciding I needed to write a Dramione piece. It's maybe 6 pages and has gone nowhere even though I have a vague idea of the plot. My muse is struggling.

I found my old folder of all the fic I wrote in the past 20 years. There are still a couple hockey fics I haven't posted to AO3. There are also Anita Blake fics (I was a hardcore Anita/Edward girlie) and Harry Potter fics (don't cancel me but I used to write Snape/Hermione; NO student/teacher stuff though). I think I have an old Doctor Who fic featuring Nine/Rose (yes, I'm a Nine girlie). And a very old Forgotten Realms fic that paired Catti-Brie up with Jarlaxle. Look, I don't know. It was ages ago. With the exception of the hockey fics, I do not think any of these are of the same quality I've posted on AO3, but I've been toying with the idea of trying to clean them up and posting them so more of my work is archived together instead of spread over various fan sites. Does anyone have any interest at all in reading this shit? Like, at all?

I decided 2024 is going to be my book binding era. I bound isthisselfcare's Draco Malfoy and the Mortifying Ordeal of Being in Love a couple weeks ago. I did all the typesetting with the help of some macros. Printed it, folded the signatures (the booklets that comprise the book), sewed them together with waxed linen thread, glued the text block together with some mull, and used chip board and book cloth to make the case. It feels and looks like a book, y'all! I could do a better job with lining the signatures up when punching the holes for sewing and with the measurements on the case, but overall I am pretty proud of it. If anyone is interested, I can link a nice tutorial series on TT and/or post progress pictures I took during my book binding experiment. I have to say, it's exciting to have the ability to put my fav fanfics on my physical bookshelf.

[angelisgonnastartchangingurls]

tell us everything about your day yesterday

oh, ok!

i woke up at 5:30am and went out for a run. it was pretty short, 3 miles, i was back in a half hour. i got really sick a few weeks ago and my lung capacity is still not 100%, i ran five miles a few days ago and i threw up on the sidewalk.

anyway, when i got back home i paced around in the backyard for ten minutes to cool down, and then i slipped back into the house to my bedroom and woke up jake by sucking his cock. we fucked (me on top, no real foreplay, the cocksucking only lasted a few seconds and we went straight to fucking) and we came at the same time, and then i laid in bed leaking while jake got up and showered as the kids woke up. at this point it was like 6:40. i got up and made oatmeal for my kids (with blueberries!) in a robe and jake was all dressed and ready before 7, so i left him to get the kids dressed and stuff and i answered a bunch of emails. i do this now in the mornings so i can get to the office after everyone but i already have them working on stuff. LOL.

the kids were playing for a bit before school, and margot woke up, so jake made breakfast for me and margot and himself, so i ended up out there with them having coffee and chatting until 8:10, and I was still in just a robe, so Jake walked the kids to school, which is usually my job.

i got dressed (no shower, LOL. white panties, no bra, jeans and a t-shirt - very professional) and margot was making a shopping list so i tried to remember everything i needed (i forgot most of it, i always do, so i have to go to target today). and then jake got home so i kissed him goodbye and left for work. i got to the office at 9:20. i had meetings with various little teams from 10-12 and by the end of the second meeting I was very bitchy and everyone was like, "OK stop giving angel new information" which i thought was a very insightful analysis of me as a coworker.

i had coffee and two cigarettes with jane, a fairly recent hire who is like a 40s goth punk chick who reminds me a lot of ivy if ivy had never gone corporate and had a dozen babies. i love jane, she's 15 years sober from heroin and she rocks. she also compliments my waist a lot, she (like many of you lol) can't believe i pushed two kids out of my pussy.

then i walked to my friend casey's work to meet her for lunch. i don't know if i ever talked about casey. i think so? she is like 27 years old and she has a baby and a much older husband and a stepdaughter who is 19. when i was in my lexi-obsessed phase she was adjusting to returning to work with a baby in her life so we didn't hang out much but now we see each other all the time.

we had lunch at a bagel place and i was back at work by 1:45, just in time for more meetings, but these were with clients and i was nicer. the t-shirt with no bra was a very good strategic decision, one of the bigger guys at the company stared at my tits the whole time, and agreed with everything i said. i wore my hair down too and played with it a lot, you know, alternating between ditzy hair twisting and sort of gathering it and arranging it behind my back like i was about to put it into a blowjob ponytail.

N.B. the ponytail blowjob is such a stereotype/meme but i never do that. i let my hair fall all over the place when i am sucking dick. men love my hair.

i had an hour in my office during which i accomplished literally nothing. i looked at my phone and deleted some emails. that's it. then i had a meeting with my boss, and we talked exclusively about sex with our respective partners. his wife is cumming really easily lately, which on the one hand he likes and on the other hand doesn't like because she's wrapping up sex really early. he said about half the time he doesn't get beyond eating her pussy; she cums and then sucks his cock and won't stop until she's swallowed every drop. but even when they get to fucking, he said she cums in like 40 seconds and hops off to suck his cock. i told him to start slapping her clit with his cock to stop her orgasms. he said she'd get so mad at him if he did that and i said, "i would beg for more." anyway, he told me i am doing a great job with the team lately so i flashed my tits at him.

alice called me at 4 and just clearly wanted to talk at me, but i let her, it's kind of like a podcast, and so she was in my ear for the end of my work day and my ride home.

when i got home, margot and the kids were in the park, so jake fucked me in the kitchen, quick and hard, panties and jeans down, bent over the kitchen island, his hand on my clit. he came inside me again and i pulled my jeans and panties up right over the mess and walked around like that all afternoon, making dinner and catching up with everyone. dinner, did a puzzle with my daughter, bathtime for the kids, storytime, bedtime, and i just took my jeans off and relaxed on the couch with jake and margot and we watched a movie. i fell asleep on jake's shoulder after the movie was over, and he moved me over on the couch, took margot to her room, fucked her and came on her tits, took a picture of it and sent it to me, which woke me up, LOL, but i was too tired to move so i let jake come in, naked, and carry me to bed. at some point in the night i took my panties off because they were full of dried cum, and this morning i woke up next to jake, he was naked and i was in just a t-shirt, so i pushed my ass against him until he woke up and fucked me from behind nice and slow. i came twice.

[steddieas-shegoes]

omg hi-- can you do 89 for the writing prompts thingy? it made me almost laugh out loud at work & i think twould be very funny so !!<3

(also you are doing so good & i am loving what you're writing !!!!)

HI! This one is hilarious and I am so amused by the versions I've already read: 89. "YOU SENT ME PICTURES OF YOU NAKED WHILE I WAS IN A WORK MEETING!"

Rated M | tags: mention of nude pictures, language, allusions to sex, this is borderline a crack ficlet because it's funny and absurd, modern au, rockstar eddie, corroded coffin guys

📱📱📱📱📱📱📱📱📱📱📱📱📱📱📱

Steve hadn't moved from bed all morning, couldn't even try at this point.

He was a little sore from Eddie's homecoming last night, but that was to be expected when he'd been gone for a month.

But he could accomplish a lot in bed, even if Eddie had to go to some stupid meeting this morning with the band.

The photographic evidence of all the things he could accomplish were sent and Steve was just waiting for the hilarious emoji response that was sure to come.

But minutes went by and he got nothing.

Eddie had definitely seen the pictures, the little 'Read 10:06am' popup under the set of four images showing he'd seen them immediately.

By 10:15, Steve was sitting up in bed, biting his nails, a nervous habit he'd picked up during his senior year of college and hadn't been able to kick.

His phone started buzzing, Eddie's contact photo filling the screen.

"Eds?"

""YOU SENT ME PICTURES OF YOU NAKED WHILE I WAS IN A WORK MEETING!"

"No, I sent you four pictures of me naked while you were in a work meeting," Steve replied, smirking to himself.

"And you didn't think that maybe that wasn't the best idea? That maybe someone sitting next to me, or two someones sitting next to me, might see these pictures? That thought didn't occur to you?" Eddie sounded mad.

Which was something Steve wasn't used to.

No matter what, Eddie was never mad at him. He'd never raised his voice, never ignored him on purpose, never done anything to show anger.

Except now.

Steve bit his lip, pulling the covers over himself and curling into a ball.

Eddie sighed.

Steve could picture him running a hand over his face, tugging on his hair, closing his eyes, all the things he did when he was stressed.

"You look beautiful, Stevie, okay? I'm just, I'm stressed and the meeting was really important and our producer saw them. He's such a creep, and then Jeff accidentally saw them when he heard my phone vibrate, and he won't even look at me now, and it's just not good timing."

Steve nodded to himself. He probably should have thought about that, but honestly, he was so high on having Eddie back, he didn't consider much of anything beyond showing off how his morning was going.

"I'm sorry, Eds."

Steve wasn't crying, it was clear that Eddie wasn't actually mad at him, but his voice still came out a bit broken, a bit sad.

"Sweetheart, I promise I'm not mad about it. I'm gonna be home soon and I'll show you just how much I loved the pictures, okay?"

"Okay." Steve smiled to himself. "Maybe we could take some new ones together?"

"What, and send them to Jeff? He might leave the band," Eddie joked.

Joking was good, it was their baseline. Steve could handle joking.

"As if he hasn't been sneaking looks at my ass for years."

"Hey!" Jeff's voice yelled in the background. "It happened, like, twice!"

Steve giggled.

"It's okay, bud, it's very distracting," Eddie said to Jeff. "Let me just grab some coffee with the guys and then I'll be home to take care of you."

Steve let out a moan, tried to hide it in his pillow.

Eddie wasn't mad, but Steve heard the tone of his voice, knew exactly how he'd be taken care of when Eddie got home.

"I was gonna get dressed and go to the store," Steve lied.

"You won't. You'll stay right there." A door closed as Eddie spoke and Steve knew he'd just found a room to talk to him privately. "You won't put any clothes on, and you'll stay in bed with your fingers keeping you ready for me just like in that third picture you sent me."

Steve was gonna scream.

"But I was gonna run errands..."

"You aren't going anywhere until I've made up for the last month. We'll have food delivered. Got it?"

"Got it."

"Good." The door opened. "Do you want me to bring you any coffee?"

Steve snorted. "Nope, I think you'll keep me awake just fine."

"Why do you even have him on speaker right now?" Gareth's voice said, faked annoyance in his tone.

"Because I have my hands full!"

"We know!" everyone yelled.

"Not like that!" Eddie yelled back. Then, "Okay, a little like that."

"See you soon, baby," Steve smiled into the phone. "Sorry about the pictures."

"You can say you're sorry when I get home," Eddie replied. "Love you."

"Love you too."

When Steve ended the call, he was sent a steady stream of texts:

Jeff: i swear i don't look at your ass. it's a nice one tho

Gareth: literally i don't wanna look at eddie anymore please make him come home now

Gareth: seriously please he doesn't need coffee he's already annoying

Grant: that's a good angle

Eds: be home soon 😉

An image came through a few seconds later, one that was clearly taken while he was talking to Steve, probably when he hid in a room.

It was just a dark shot of Eddie's crotch, pants unbuttoned and unzipped, showing absolutely nothing.

Steve shook his head and replied: you're not very good at this. love you though.

He would just have to show Eddie how to get a good angle for his next attempt at sending something suggestive.

[monbons]

an ask game for writers to procrastinate working on your WIP(s)

thanks for tagging me @bookish-bogwitch, @thewholelemon, @cutestkilla, and @noblecorgi!

1. 🦈Tell us the name of your/ one of your WIP(s): Currently, living, breathing, and eating my one and only WIP: The Eternal Life of Baz Pitch. Also, I am probably retiring after this fic because I do not think I can top it!

2. 🍄Describe your WIP/one of your WIP(s) in the format of “___ + ___ =___” Addie LaRue + SnowBaz = so much pain and angst

3. 🌍What tags or warnings will one of your WIP(s) need if you intend to share it? Period-typical homophobia, Implied/referenced DV, Blood and Injury, Death... I mean truly the works. This is SnowBaz in the darkest possible timeline.

4. 🧭An alternative title to one of your WIP(s)? At one point, I joked with @thewholelemon about naming it "Baz Pitch's 300 Year Long Grope-Fest" but for obvious reasons that title would really do a disservice to this fic (although it is sort of true).

5. ⚠️Which WIP you're most likely to finish or update next? Now that I've created a posting schedule for The Eternal Life of Baz Pitch, I want to stick to it. While I'm "done" drafting, I am still making a few big revisions to the last six chapters. I've also been re-reading the first chapters for continuity issues that may have cropped up now that I know how this ends. Either way, I can see the finish line.

6. 💾What is your document of your WIP/ a WIP called? (not the stories actual title but what you’ve saved it as) It started out as "Addie LaRue Working Draft." Once the one doc got unwieldy and long, it spun out into multiple docs titled all sorts of things - mostly chapter numbers, but I do have one not as fun as it sounds doc called "Sex Playground." (ha!)

7. 🖍Post Any sentence(s) from your WIP. “Are you so naive as to think I cannot watch you whenever it pleases me, even if you cannot see me?”

8. ♻️A scrapped idea for your current WIP. I actually have SEVERAL scenes I scrapped...like pages and pages! Largely this is because I have a whole document titled "Voice," which served as a sandbox of sorts where I could play with every possible combination of POV, tone, and style before committing to the final version you see in the story now. There's even a scene in there told first-person Niall! (Bonkers.)

I also have a whole ACTUAL scene I'd love to include as an answer to this question because it was well-written, but I cut it because it made the plot unnecessarily complicated, was frankly too close to the original plot of Addie, and would have made my ending impossible. It is also--sadly--too big a spoiler to include here, so let me give you a few sentences from "Sex Playground" that will not be making the cut:

“Stay.” Baz pushes his hand into the center of Simon’s chest, pressing him back into the mattress. “I want to look at you.” Simon gives Baz a filthy smile. He can look all he wants. 

9. 🤔What’s a story you’d love to write but haven’t even started yet? I really want to write a canon divergence where Simon successfully but somewhat accidentally reveals Baz is a vampire fifth year, so Baz and the whole Pitch family have to flee from the Mage. I already have the "everybody finds out" scene written and the scene where the Mage realizes the Pitch family is gone, so I guess I have started it. But, I also have no idea where it's going or what it's about, so I haven't really accomplished anything. If anyone has ideas or wants to be a partner-in-crime on this, give me a little shout!

10. 🤡How many WIPS are you actively working on? Literally just this one. Again, I am retiring after this fic! (Or at least taking a very well-deserved break.)

11. 🛠Is there a scene or anything in the WIP you are struggling with right now? Absolutely 100% it is writing the smut. Having never written any on-page sex means I'm figuring it out as I go. Lots of frustrated growls from me (not nearly as frustrated from Simon).

12. ❤️Not a question, just a second Kudos to send. I know many of you have already posted, but tagging anyway since you've commented/liked past WIPsdays and such, in case you're interested in the behind the scenes!

@valeffelees, @roomwithanopenfire, @noblecorgi, @cutestkilla, @iamamythologicalcreature, @you-remind-me-of-the-babe, @youarenevertooold, @drowninginships, @emeryhall, @hushed-chorus, @rimeswithpurple, @aristocratic-otter, @larkral, @artsyunderstudy, @brilla-brilla-estrellita