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#but i was like hey if u have one just send it to me or the cremation place has some just see if u like any
haetrack · 2 days
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pro: love: add
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hacker!haechan x afab!reader
wc: 11.6k
warnings: smut, little plot, they are PERVERTS, slight invasion of privacy, esex, masturbation, praising, degradation, overstimulation, edging, sex meetup, oral, unprotected sex (NO!), switch!haechan, switch!reader, mentions of panty sniffing, breeding, fleshlight, this is all very unrealistic and i also know nothing about hackers thank u (also this represents haechan in no way)
a/n: HAPPY BDAY TO MY SPARKLY PRINCESS!!! this is the best guy ever... hope everyone enjoys my little present :3
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if you asked him how he became a member of an underground maybe-not-so-ethical kinda-not-really mafia group, he wouldn’t know what to say.
when he was younger, he took interest in the technology around him. because of this interest, he finds himself in front of his laptop, quickly hacking into some random company’s firewall for his boss. he doesn’t mess with anything else, grabbing some information of a person he doesn’t know to send off.
he puts all the information about the man in a well protected folder and sends it off. that’s really all he does. he’s someone who works behind the scenes, unlike his other group members who have a more up close hand in everything. he wouldn’t want to either way, finding the solidarity and animosity in his room to be just right.
it was easy for haechan to get used to this lifestyle. he never really had too many people to talk to before, so now he gets to make easy money in the comfort of his home without talking a lot. he can do everything in his apartment without having to go out much, either. 
he yawns before closing all the windows on his screen. he’s done all the work he was assigned today, but he doesn’t know what he wants to do next. he takes his glasses off his face, hand moving to rub at his eyes before he slumps against his gaming chair. his hands fall to his lap, one of his thumbs massaging the soft skin of his inner thigh.
he smirks to himself, quickly acting on impulse as he moves to palm the front of his shorts. his cock twitches at the touch as he sighs contently at the feeling. his head rolls back against his seat, shutting his eyes as he gets hard. he bites his lip as he hand moves to slide under the waistband of his shorts and boxers-
he’s cut off by his phone buzzing loudly at the corner of the desk. he debates on not answering, but when he brings his phone close to his face, he curses. he sits up a bit before sliding his glasses back on, grumbling to himself as he answers the phone.
“what do you want, mark?”
“all i did was call you and you’re already mad,” mark huffs.
haechan rolls his eyes, “please hurry up and tell me why you called me.”
he can hear mark clear his throat, “johnny’s asking if you’ve sent that information taeil needs.”
haechan can feel his own mood turning sour. his tongue pokes at his cheek, “you can tell johnny that he can ask me that himself.”
it’s silent for a few moments on the other side of the call. haechan wants to scream at mark for taking so long when he could be doing other things. he feels his blood turn cold when he hears johnny’s voice, “hey, haechan? i need you to send those files before i make sure that your pay gets cut.”
“y-yeah, sorry! i just sent them a bit ago. please don’t reduce my pay, i might actually die.” 
johnny laughs lightly, haechan sighing in relief at the sound, “i wouldn’t do that to you. you’re lucky taeil likes you so much.”
haechan cries out a thank you to him, causing the other two to laugh. he waits for them to calm down before beginning, “let me know if taeil needs anything else. i have to go, i was a little busy before you called.”
mark’s voice sounds from the call, “doing?”
johnny interrupts, “probably something nasty.”
“no! why do you always say that?”
“what else should i expect from a guy who does shit with his computer and stays inside all day?”
haechan groans, “whatever. i’m hanging up.”
haechan is quick to turn his phone on silent before throwing it somewhere on his bed. he isn’t hard anymore, but now he’s too desperate to just ignore it. he opens a private screen on his computer before scrolling for a bit. he doesn’t want to watch porn, doesn’t want to read it, but there’s something he wants to try.
he’s heard through small forums of this website that allows you to chat with an online service that adjusts to your preferences automatically. he finds it after some time, hands slightly shaky as he presses on the link. it’s a nice looking website, stating some information before he can actually get into it. he wonders what mechanisms were used to make it. he can’t help it.
he skims through the information before clicking the start button. he’s met with the sight of an anime-looking girl, one that he’d find on hentai. the voice calls out to him, what would you like to do with me tonight?
he’s quick to type out, ive been so busy. just need someone to take care of me.
the character on the screen leans forward more, exposing more of her chest. haechan bites his lip at the sight, her voice calling out again, yeah? want me to take care of you? make you feel nice and good?
he responds with a yes, quickly shimmying out of his shorts as his cock strains in his boxers. it’s not often that he gets to talk like this with someone, even if this someone isn’t real. he’s too horny to care, not when he’s already been denied once. the character smiles at his response, groping at its chest. haechan watches closely, eyes hooded as he once again palms himself.
it must be so hard for you, right? the character says, getting bossed around all day when all you wanna do is get taken care of. i’ll do anything you want me to. 
there’s a voice-to-chat option, but haechan isn’t really sure he wants to do that for his own privacy. he’ll manage to type with one hand while his other grips around his clothed length. make yourself feel good w me, want u 2 tell me when to cum.
the character agrees quickly, the screen pushing back to get its whole body in frame. it’s clad in only panties, smiling at him before speaking, are you gonna touch yourself for me? let me see how big your cock is?
he slides his boxers down just enough to get his length out. it slaps against his stomach, leaking at the tip. he didn’t realize how needy he was until now, easily wrapping his fist around his length. it’s easy for him to give in, the character’s words drifting to his ear, causing small whines to fill the air.
he tunes it all out eventually (not counting when he gets praised). he can’t stop thinking about how bad he wants to do this with someone in real life. he always says it’s because he’s too busy with his job, but he knows he can’t keep lying to himself. he pretends that sweet voice that’s calling out to him is someone real, sitting right on top of him as he gets whispered praises.
his hand wraps around his cock tighter at the thought, his hips bucking up into his fist. he licks his lips as his other hand trails up his hand, his fingers brushing over his nipple. quiet whimpers fill the air, and there’s nothing he wants more than to moan out someone’s name. 
he could give everything to someone. he’d be so obsessed, practically at their beck and call. he just needs to put all this energy and desperation he has somewhere. he isn’t a loser, isn’t gross, but it’s hard to deny it all when he’s getting off to a character calling him sweet and coaxing him to an orgasm.
he bites down on his lip to stop the pathetic moan that tries to slip out. he’s not typing anymore, listening in to what the voice is telling him to do. speed up, show me how bad you need it, and all haechan can do is obey and fuck his fist faster. 
sobs sound throughout his room as his fist tightens around his tip, his thumb teasing at it. he no longer cares about how loud he’s being, no longer cares about denying how pathetic he looks right now. all he wants to do is cum, wants someone to come over so he can stuff all of his cum inside of a warm pussy.
it doesn’t take much longer, cum spurting all over his fist as he pinches at his nipples, loud whimpers slipping out of him. his ears are ringing, the voice speaking to him inaudible as he rides out his high. his hips twitch when he tries to overstimulate himself, a breathy laugh slipping out of his mouth.
the character looks fucked out, cheeks red as if it came down from its own orgasm. there’s a small smirk on its face, thanking him for everything, telling him just how good he’s been. haechan lays back onto his chair, heavy breaths beginning to even out. it’s when he hears the voice speak up again:
thanks for being such a good boy, lee donghyuck.
haechan’s heart stops. what did it just say? 
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it was easy getting all of his information.
you don’t really tap into the chats happening on your website, but this one piqued your interest. the fake name put in sounded too familiar, something you're sure you’ve heard before. you can’t miss out on this opportunity of possibly getting to see one of the most renowned hackers. 
when you dig a little deeper, you’re met with some information about him. you’d think for a hacker, he’d be a little more protective about his information. it’s all laid out in front of you, almost as if he were begging for someone- for you to find it.
you can’t help but fuck with him a little. you make the character that he’s talking to call him by his real name. that’s all you were gonna do, really, besides look over his chat (to which you find out he likes being called a good boy). you know what he’s capable of, and if this is really him, you don’t want anything to happen to you.
except, you don’t really take into account how good he is at what he does, and you’re quick to get a call from someone you don’t know. you ignore it, obviously, given the circumstance you’re in. you should block the number seeing how you’re being spammed with calls, but you can’t get yourself to. you want to see how far this can go, to see if it’s really him, and just to make fun of him a little.
after what seems like the twentieth call, you finally pick up. it sounded like he was hyperventilating for a moment, but you assume he saw that you actually answered with how quiet he got. you don’t want to talk first, none of this is really your fault. you can hear him suck in a breath before he speaks, “who are you and what did you just do?”
“well, if you got my number, i’m assuming you already know who i am.”
he’s mumbling to himself in words you can’t hear. you should be scared, but knowing he just got off on your website makes this whole thing funnier. he can’t exactly report you, either. he would have to prove how he got your number when he doesn’t even know you.
“what made you even look into my conversation?” he pauses for a bit, probably recounting the whole chat,  “i wasn’t even doing anything wrong?”
“your username seemed pretty familiar to me. sounded like something i’ve definitely heard before.” you pause, letting your words sit in the air. you can hear his breath pick up, trying to pull himself together at the possible thought of being caught. you start again, “are you… 6sunfull?”
he doesn’t speak. you don’t need him to say that he is, the silence tells you everything you need to know. you speak again, “you know, for being such a good hacker, you kinda suck at hiding your information.”
“how did you even find it? if it’s how i’m thinking, then that’s like, a total invasion of my privacy!”
you laugh, “that’s crazy coming from you. isn’t your whole job all about invading other people’s privacy?”
“it’s different!” he lets out an exasperated noise, “you run a porn website, think about your customers privacy!”
you splutter out a laugh, “look, i’m not gonna report you or anything. i just think it’s funny that someone like you was begging to be taken care of.”
“how do you even know that i’m that hacker? what if i’m just a random person getting my info taken away from me?”
“one, you got my number out of nowhere. two, you knew how i got your information. you’re used to this. plus, your birthday was basically in your username.”
an annoyed sound comes from his side of the call, “all i used was a six! whatever. i don’t want to talk about this anymore. do whatever with that information.” he quickly hangs up afterwards. you can’t blame him, you would probably try to run away from this, too. he didn’t ask you to block his number either, which tells you should let him take his time.
after all, he sounded too cute to let go.
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a few days pass and you haven’t heard from him.
you’ve been trying to pretend like you don’t want to text him or you don’t want him to call you, but it’s been hard. he hasn’t been back on your website, hasn’t shown any sign of thinking about you. you’re not sure why you’re so invested, but knowing that you might be one of the only people who knows who he is helps.
but today, you get a text from the same unknown number from the other night.
unknown: you’re not going to report me to the police or anything… right
you: why would i do that
knowing that he’s on his phone, you’re quick to press the call button. it rings a few times before he decides to answer, a smile beginning to form on your face. you want to start talking, but he decides he wants to speak first, “i will send you whatever amount of money you want if you don’t snitch.”
“who says snitch anymore? and it’s too embarrassing for me to go to a police station and tell them i found a hacker who was on my pornsite.”
by the tone of his voice, you can tell he’s embarrassed, “thanks, i guess…” 
“you do owe me, though. for not ratting you out.”
“what do you want me to do?”
you know exactly what you want, “just for you to talk to me. i’m giving you the chance to talk to someone, donghyuck.”
you can hear him scoff on the other side, “who says i don’t talk to anyone? and don’t call me that, it’s weird. just call me haechan.”
ignoring him, you continue, “just trying to be nice. maybe next time you won’t have to use my website and instead you can just text me.”
“what?”
“only a suggestion. you don’t have to, but i’m just putting it out there. if you’re that desperate to use a pornbot, you can just use me instead.”
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the words you said the other day were only meant to tease haechan.
after you finished speaking, you could hear him choke on his own breath, trying to calm himself down. you laughed it off, but you didn’t realize how much it impacted him. you played it off as a joke, trying to move on before he could think about it any further. he said he had other things to do, quickly trying to hang up before you could continue. you hope you didn’t take anything too far.
you realize why he wanted to hang up so quickly when you’re met with a call late in the evening. lazily answering the call, you greet haechan. there’s silence on the other side of the call. you wait for him to speak, but you’re met with an airy groan as a response. your heart stops beating for a bit, and you quietly ask, “what’s wrong?”
when he speaks, it’s pitchy and breathy all at the same time, “t-thought you said… thought you said you could help me…”
did you really mean it? when you said you wanted to see how far this could go, you didn’t mean it like this. you start to mull over your options, but at your silence, you can hear the slick noise of haechan fucking his fist. the thought makes your body heat up, any thoughts you had were thrown out the window. how desperate is he to do it so openly in front of you?
it’s like he already knows that you would agree. he lets out a hushed whimper that almost sounds like your name, and you can’t help how your thighs squeeze together. you bite your lip, imagining how exactly he might look right now. you wonder why he decided to call you up, someone who’s practically a stranger, instead of someone else. 
you give in out of pure curiosity, only wanting to know more about what made haechan come to you. out of the few conversations you had, he wants you to help get him off, he wants to hear your voice telling him to cum. it’s why you ask, “are you going to tell me what you’re doing right now?”
“i’m… i was thinking about what you said to me. thought about what you would say to me, how you might sound… wanted to hear your pretty voice.”
you move to your bed, laying against the headboard as you get comfortable. you slide down your shorts, squeezing your thighs once more. you can feel how uncomfortably wet you are, feeling how you clench around nothing at the sound of haechan whining.
you try to stop your voice from being so shaky before you speak, “aren’t you embarrassed? moaning like this in front of a stranger?”
you can hear the sound of him fucking his fist faster, “d-don’t care. you’ve already seen how i’m like, spying on me and all… you probably like this, too.”
you scoff into the mic, but he’s right. he’s being so shameless, but you can’t help but feed into it. you do want to make him hold out though. you want to see him beg, just like he was on the chat. just this once, you’ll give into him. you breathe out, “you just need my help, hm? just need me to take care of you and make you cum?”
he’s moaning, obviously too horny to care about how loud he’s being. he laughs a little at how your teasing him for his messages, “wanna see you cum, too. please cum with me.”
you hum, “don’t know if you deserve it, you were getting off without me.”
“please? wanna hear you and how wet your pussy is.”
you can’t help the small whimper that escapes you, causing haechan to moan louder than you. your hand slides down over your panties, teasing yourself while haechan continues to get off on the call.
he picks up on how quiet you’re being, choosing to take over, “you’re touching yourself, too, right? stopped teasing me so much so you can touch your pretty pussy?”
you hate how much his words get to you, trying to hide your noises by biting down on your lip. he’s not even trying to be mean, he’s just rambling, saying all the thoughts he has out loud for you to hear.
“would you be mad if i said i looked up what you look like? just wanted- wanted to see how you looked like. it’s not fair that you already know how i look.”
you moan out, your fingers circling your clothed clit at his words. you don’t care about how obvious you’re being anymore, not caring how haechan could probably hear how desperate you are. if anything, the groan he lets out tells you everything you need to know.
his voice is whiny, “wanna see you, w-wanna see you cum. are you gonna cum, too? wanna see it… can i please facetime you, i just- i’m so close.”
“fuck… are you sure? aren’t you worried that-”
“no, i don’t care. promise, just need to see you. i’m gonna cum without you if you keep on-”
you hang up the call before he can finish his sentence, a smile forming on your face as a minute passes by. you quickly facetime him, greeted by the sight of the upper part of haechan’s face. his bangs brush over the frames of his glasses, eyes widening in shock when he realizes you called back. his head tilts back into his gaming chair, a moan slipping out at the sight of you smiling at him.
you laugh, “are you gonna let me see all of you?”
he blinks back at you, shyness seemingly taking over him, “i-i thought you didn’t wanna talk to me so i kinda… let myself cum.”
you let out an astounded laugh at his words, watching as he props his phone on his desk, showing you the mess he made. his shirt was lifted enough for all his cum to miss it, shorts tugged down as if he was rushing to touch himself. his cheeks are flushed, biting his lip as he shyly watches your reaction. you tilt your head, “do you think you can cum again?”
“only if i get to see you,” he pushes the hair out of his eyes so he can see you better. he can’t look away once you set your phone against your pillow, letting haechan drink in the sight of you. it’s almost embarrassing for you as he lets out a loud whine when he sees that you’re only wearing an oversized shirt and your panties. he pants, “you look so much better like this, needed more than just your voice.”
“yeah?” you slip a hand between your thighs, “nothing’s ever enough for you, right?”
you watch as he swipes his fingers through the cum on his stomach before wrapping his hand around his length, his hips twitching at the feeling. he’s trying to hold back his moans, trying to fight through the overstimulation as he starts moving his fist. his eyes watch you with intent, just waiting to see what you do next. “slow down if you wanna cum with me,” you sigh, “you’re gonna cum without me again.”
“yeah, sorry, just-” he hesitantly pulls his hand away from his cock, choosing to run it over his stomach. his hand pushes his shirt up, brushing his fingers over his nipples as he lets out a small whine. his eyes focus on you again, “you just look so good right now, can’t help myself.”
“really?” you ask, hand slipping under your panties to rub at your clit. you swallow down a moan, “all you wanna do is stuff me full of your cock, hm? take care of me, too?”
“yes, please. wanna do it so fucking bad. wanna fuck you full of my cum.” his eyes flutter shut, the thought being too much for him to handle. his eyes shoot open when he hears a choked whimper come out of you, realizing that you pulled your panties aside for him to see. even though it’s dark in your room, he’ll take anything he can get.
“isn’t that too much to ask from a person you barely know?”
“d-don’t act like you don’t like it. you’re just as bad as me, getting yourself off to a stranger.”
you clench at his words before giving in and teasing a finger into your cunt. all you can think about is him, the sounds of his moans and how hard his fucking his hand surrounds you. he can’t help it either, eyes glued on how your finger slides in and out of you. he debates on turning his volume all the way up when he swears he can hear how wet you are.
you slip a second finger inside, moaning at the feeling. hearing haechan whimper, your eyes focus on the screen, watching as his hand tightens around his base, stopping himself from cumming right away. you let out a shaky sigh, calming yourself down before speaking, “i’m almost gonna cum, too, just wait for me.”
“i just wanna-” his fist wraps around his tip, hips fucking into the tight space, “wanna do it for you. wanna finger you, wanna fuck you, wanna eat you out. i can do whatever you want.”
your palm rubs against your clit, your thighs beginning to shake. he sounds so desperate, just from seeing you like this. even though you’re a stranger, he can’t help but want you. everything about him screams that he’s a gross pervert, but that only draws you in more. he might just bring out the worst in you. 
“you’ll let me play with you, too, right? let you fuck my mouth, let me touch you how ever i want? let everyone know that you’re mine?”
he nods quickly, moans of your name spilling out of his mouth as he tells you he’s about to cum. you feel the same, one of your hands sneaking up to pinch at your nipple. haechan’s eyes struggle to stay open, watching you get yourself off just because of him. he’s the one making you feel good, all through the sight of him and his words.
“fuck, can you show me your tits? wanna- wish i could cum all over them.”
you pull up your shirt to expose your chest, haechan cumming for the second time this night at the sight of you on display for him. his hand pinches at his nipple, matching your movements as he rides out his orgasm. you follow right after, cumming at the sight of him looking so fucked out. 
haechan tries to catch his breath again, letting out a breathy laugh, “god… i should’ve taken a screenshot.”
your post-orgasm haze is ruined by his words, “why can’t you be normal and just ask for a nude later?”
“isn’t it more romantic knowing that i wanted to capture something so beautiful in the heat of the moment?”
you frown at him, watching as he pulls a tissue from his desk, wiping off the cum on his chest, “knowing you have tissues on your desk tells me that you know nothing about being romantic.”
a pout forms on his face, trying to make himself look more presentable as if he didn’t just cum right in front of you. you can’t deny that he doesn’t look good, and now that he brings his phone closer to his face, you can see just how good he looks. there’s a few moles adorning his face, tying all of his pretty features together.
he notices you staring for too long, smirking a bit, “you can’t be mean to a stranger like that! you’ll help me learn to be a little more romantic, right?”
as much as you want to say no, you’re forced to agree when you see the hopeful look in his eyes.
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you’ve been talking to haechan a lot more.
he’s been telling you his interests other than coding and hacking. he lets you in on his day to day life, even when all he’s done was work. you think it’s cute how he calls you for things other than sex. you’ve gotten texts from him asking what he should eat for lunch, calls ranting about an episode from a show he’s watching. you like that he’s trying to get close to you.
you wonder if he’s ever had someone to talk to like this. even though he told you he talks to his coworkers, there’s only so much you can talk about with people you work with. especially if it’s for an underground-basically-illegal business. you try not to think about it too much, especially with how happy haechan gets when he has a chance to talk to you. 
today he called you while you were in the middle of fixing a bug that was reported on your website. he didn’t text you early that morning, and you didn’t want to bother him assuming that he was busy. you weren’t expecting his call, but you welcome it.
“why are you calling me at the grocery store?”
he laughs as if it’s the most normal thing, “people call at the grocery store, it’s normal. plus, i was feeling a little lonely. who else would i have called?”
“fine. right now i’m trying to see what’s wrong with my code. someone reported today that there was something wrong with my website.”
“those poor people.”
“haechan, you were one of those ‘poor people.’” 
he brushes you off, saying that he’s better than all of them now that he has you. he tells you that he’s getting a few things to make lunch for himself later. he was busy with work earlier, but he can’t tell you exactly what he was doing, not right now. it’s easy to forget that everything he does is supposed to be a secret, even from you.
“so, you’re gonna cook? you don’t seem like a good cook.”
“hey! i am a very good cook, you just have to trust me. i just needed to pick up a few things.”
you halfheartedly scan through the lines of code, not in any rush to fix anything. it wasn’t that important, not when the thought of haechan looking domestic seems to get stuck in your head. “yeah?” you hum, “wish i was there with you, wish i could try some.”
the laugh he lets out causes you to smile, not being able to fight off the effect he has on you. there’s a part of you that really does want to see him. how he might lean over the stove, his shoulders on display for you as you watch from behind. you lose your train of thought, hearing haechan grumble about them not having the right product.
“you know, if i was there, watching you cook, i wouldn’t be able to help myself.”
you can hear how his mumbling abruptly stops, catching onto the meaning of your words. if only you had facetimed him, you would’ve been able to see his face. he wouldn’t be able to hide behind his screen like he is now. you start again, “wish i could hug you from behind, maybe kiss your neck a bit if you’d let me.”
he whispers into his phone as if other people can hear you, “you’re gonna tell me this while i’m in the produce section? please calm down.” 
you let out a light chuckle, “as if you don’t like it.”
“why are you trying to get me hard in a grocery store? you need to be normal.”
you shrug, forgetting that he can’t see you, “it’s your fault you take everything i say seriously.”
it’s quiet again, and you assume haechan is trying to calm himself down. you can’t help but continue, “i hope when you cook, all you can think about is my hands all over you, especially where you need me the most.”
he speaks up again, soft, just for you to hear, “say one more thing and i’ll have to jerk off in the store’s restroom.”
laughter slips out of you, unable to keep yourself serious at the thought, “in the store’s bathroom? you really are a gross pervert!”
“stop! you are, too! you like seeing me be like this!”
you can’t deny it, so you let out a dreamy sigh, “you can just show me later, instead.”
and who is he to say no to you?
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you always knew that haechan had a dirty mouth.
in all of the calls you both shared together, he always managed to say something that would catch you off guard. days where he wants to fill you up with his cum, days where all he wants is for you to call him a needy slut, other days where he threatens to buy a fleshlight if he can’t fuck you soon. this is who haechan is as a person, and you find yourself following his ways.
today, though, he really can’t stop talking.
he must’ve been worked up, trying to start the call as normal as one can before he eventually breaks down. in his own words, all he wants to do is “be smothered by your pussy.” as much as you want to cringe at his words, you can’t help the way your body heats up at the thought of him only thinking about you.
“fuck, just wanna taste.”
his eyes are zeroed into how wet you are, how all he can hear is the squelch of your pussy through his headphones. all he wants for you to do is shove your fingers in his mouth, letting him get a taste of how sweet you are. “please, i could make you feel so good. i just know you taste so good, smell so good, too.”
you let out a weak moan of his name, your body needing nothing more than for him to take care of you. his eyes are dazed, watching how his hips fuck into his fist just from the sight of you. you think he might just be a little bit obsessed with you, memorizing all the points of your body just from his phone.
“i wouldn’t stop eating you out until you’re begging me. wanna feel you pull at my hair and push me away. just need it so bad, need you so bad.”
“y-yeah?” you breathe, “do i need to send you some panties in the mail? p-perverts like you like that, right?”
he lets out a fuck, gripping at his base. through the low light and the slight grain on his phone, you can see pearly cum leak out of his tip, watching him willingly ruin his own orgasm. his whole body is shivering, and even in the darkness you can see how his cheeks are pink. there’s shock written on your face, and he just lazily smirks at you, “only wanna cum good if you’re feeling good with me.”
“then show me how good i should be feeling.”
he’s quick to continue his ministrations, curses leaving his mouth as he fucks through the overstimulation, whimpers filling the air. you swear you can see a few tears leave his eyes, his back arching up for your touch, wishing that you could just reach through the screen.
“j-just wanna,” a moan cuts him off, “wanna show everyone you’re mine. wanna mark you, wanna fuck you full of my cum.”
“wanna show me off? let everyone know just how good you fuck me?”
his free hand begins pinching at his nipple, causing his hips to stutter a bit, “of course. i’d record us, watch every single time i miss you. i’d post it to your website, too. make sure everyone knows that you’re mine.”
“all they’re gonna see is how good i can fuck you, watch how i can make you all fucked out.”
“wan’ it, want it so bad.”
“you always say that you’re gonna be the one fucking me, but that’s my job, right? you’d let me use you like a little toy? taking everything i give to you?” your own movements speed up as you watch him fall apart at your words. you can’t imagine how he’d be in real life if he’s acting like this over a call.
“fuck yes. all i wanna be is yours, i’ll do whatever you ask me to.”
you can tell he’s close, hand speeding up over his cock as he writhes around in his seat. you can hear all of the sounds he’s making, wanting nothing more than to cum at the thought of you two together. however, you cut through his thoughts, “then will you stop touching yourself?”
he’s shocked when he hears you, hooded eyes looking back at yours. his hand stops moving, but he still has a tight grip on his length. a little breathlessly, he asks, “what? i- i can’t…”
you cock your head to the side, “you just said you’d do anything i ask you to do though?”
“does it have to be now? c-can’t it be next time?”
you shrug, “i’ll do whatever you want next time if you do this for me now.”
he immediately rips his hand away from his cock, placing both hands onto his thigh. you scoot back a bit on your bed, showing off the rest of your body to him. you watch his cock twitch just from the sight of you, his hands itching to make himself feel good.
your fingers circle your clit, head tilting back at the feeling. “sometimes, you just have to slow down a bit. take a real look at what’s in front of you, y’know?” 
you know he’s not really paying attention when he’s slow to nod. you watch as his cock helplessly twitches on his abdomen, begging to be touched by him, to be touched by you. with how wet you are, you can slide in two fingers easily, moaning out his name. he looks so desperate, almost willing to beg for anything. “won’t you tell me how good i look?”
he runs his hands up and down his thighs, his blunt nails digging into his skin. you wanna laugh at how his cock jumps with the slight pain, haechan trying to hide the whimper he lets out. he heaves out, “l-look so good… i know you’d look even better filled up with my cum…”
you pout, “are you saying i don’t look that good right now?”
“no! i’m fighting the urge to not cum untouched just from watching you.”
you moan at the thought, your back arching up as your hips roll into your hand. your eyes focus on him, “you better hurry and touch yourself before i cum all by myself.”
he’s quick to obey, hand wrapping around his cock and setting a quick rhythm. he’s louder than you, whines and whimpers of your name being the only thing leaving his mouth. “think ‘m gonna cum… please, want you to cum with me!”
“y-yes! haechan, i’m cumming!”
your mind goes blank as you come undone, body tightening in on itself as you clench around your fingers. through blurry eyes, you can see haechan with his head thrown back, cum spurting all over his chest as he moans out your name. you think he looks the best like this, the only thing on his mind being you.
it’s quiet for a few minutes after you both come down from your highs. you’re laid down onto your bed while haechan is slumped in his gaming chair. you don’t bother to get up, enjoying the presence of haechan, even through the phone. 
the silence is cut off by haechan, “i really need to get you back for edging me. do you know how mean that is?”
“i personally really liked it. i should’ve taken a screenshot of how desperate you looked. i would’ve made it my wallpaper.”
“if you say it like that, then… i wouldn’t mind. everyone would see how obsessed i am with you.”
you watch as haechan contemplates his next words, and he looks a little too serious for you to be comfortable. you want to ask if something is wrong, but he beats you to it, “did you really mean it when you said that you would send your panties to me?”
you glare at him, “in what world would i want to do that? you are so gross.”
he coos at you, “you like it though.”
“i’d only want you to see them in person. you can keep them and do whatever gross thing you want with them then.”
“are you serious about meeting in person?”
you think about it for a few moments. as much as you’d want to, there are a few things you’re worried about. even though you’ve revealed so much to him, you’re not sure how you feel about inviting him over to your place yet. you let out a small laugh, “you could just look up my address.”
“i wouldn’t do that. not to you.”
his words make you a little shy, despite the meaning behind them. for haechan, these words are tender, keeping a part of his life away from you. he wouldn’t hurt you like that. it brings you relief, and it only makes it harder for you to hide the feelings that begin to grow inside of you.
you both think about what options you have. there’s only so much desire you can hold back before the urge to really meet him takes over. you throw an idea out, “how about we both meet at a selected place?”
“like a hotel?”
your eyes shine at his suggestion, “exactly! i forget how smart you are.”
his tongue pokes the inside of his cheeks, “only for you, baby.”
you threaten to end the call because of the pet name.
(he begs for you to stay on call with him.)
(you say yes.)
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you spend the next few weeks planning out a trip where you can both meet.
the both of you figure out a place that’s convenient for the both of you, some kind of middle point where you can choose a hotel. haechan says he can pay for it all, willing to splurge a little more if it’s for you. it’s easy for you to agree, not willing to argue with a man who probably has way more money than he lets on.
there’s a lot of things that you’re nervous about when you start packing for the trip. you hope haechan is as nice as he lets on in person. you could end up not liking him by the end of this trip. what if he doesn’t like you? what if you do something weird and he doesn’t like you anymore?
it dawns upon you that he’s haechan. 
all of the days leading up to this, where you both talk for as long as you can, it’s obvious how much he likes you. he spends a lot of his free time with you, even if he’s doing something else. it’s safe for you to say that you feel the same way. you can only hope that this trip shows the feelings that have been building up.
it’s really nothing that you should be worried about. as the days lead up, you both talk about how excited you are. haechan says as soon as he gets you alone, he’ll be pressing you against the wall, kissing you until you beg him to do something. you say that that will most likely not be happening, but you like his confidence anyways.
the actual traveling day isn’t so bad. you don’t have to wake up too early, and you already prepared everything you need from the night before. you recount everything you need to do before heading out, letting haechan know that you’re already on the way. he’s quick to respond, telling you that he beat you by already leaving his house before you. you thumbs down his text.
after a few hours of traveling, you make it to the hotel. a grimace forms on your face when you see the fancy-looking hotel, wondering just how much haechan paid for the both of you. you arrive a bit earlier than scheduled, but it’s not too crowded in the lobby, so you sit down before texting haechan.
you: i just got here
you: are you close or 
haechan: im nearby so u can just wait for me
haechan: literally gonna shit my pants when i see u
you quietly laugh at his text before reacting to it with a thumbs down. you scroll through your phone for a few minutes as you try to calm your heart down. you’re not really paying attention to the screen, moreso trying to convince other people that you’re not currently trying not to die from nervousness.
it’s ten times worse when he texts you that he made it to the hotel. you shut off your phone, grabbing your bags before standing up. your eyes are focused on the entrance, biting your lip with every moment that passes.
you let out a breath when he walks in, relaxing at the sight of haechan walking in. he looks equally as nervous as you did, eyes nervously flicking across the lobby. it’s when he hears you calling his name that he looks at you, a small smile painting his face. 
any worries that you had from before fade away as you walk towards him, a grin on your face as you drop your bags to hug him. he jumps a little in your hold, his arms hesitating slightly when he hugs you back. it’s weird to be able to feel him after so long, you never would’ve expected this to happen.
“haechan,” you breathe out, “i’m so glad you got here.”
he holds you a little tighter, “me too. i… i can’t believe you’re actually real…”
you laugh at his comment, noticing something different, “i didn’t know you wear glasses?”
“stop, it’s embarrassing…” he mutters shyly, “just wanted to make sure i can see you good.”
you pull away from him, asking if he’s ready to check in now that he’s here. you make it over to the front desk. the person at the desk is subtly trying to text on their phone, quickly turning it off and around once you clear your throat. they smile, “how can i help you?”
you let them know that you’re checking into a room for two people. once you get asked for the payment, haechan fishes around for his card somewhere in his bag. it takes a few moments, the receptionist staring at you two. it’s almost as if they can see how this is your first time meeting each other.
you focus on the polaroid on the back of their phone, a picture of them with a man with a bright smile and dark hair. you break away once they give you the room keys, “let me know if you need anything else.” 
you thank them before grabbing everything, heading to the elevator. no one speaks when you two enter, no one else in the elevator but the both of you. you can see haechan’s fingers twitch at his sides before choosing to wrap an arm around you. a small laugh leaves you, easily leaning into his side, pressing a small kiss to the skin of his neck. you laugh harder when he shakes at the feeling.
he pulls away from you once you make it to your floor. your body is buzzing every second you’re apart from him, wondering why he isn’t all over you like he said he’d be. his hand is shaking when he messes with the key, opening the door and stumbling in.
the room is big, one large bed for the both of you. haechan laughs as you drop your bags to plop yourself into bed. you look back at him expectantly, watching as he cautiously puts his bags down and sits next to you in bed. you place your hand on his thigh to pull yourself up close to his face, your noses almost touching.
you can hear his breath hitch, how his eyes move to look at your lips, a faint blush forming on his cheeks. you cock your head to the side, “don’t you wanna kiss me? like you said you would?”
he licks his lips, “i… will you- will you let me?”
you do it for him. you press your lips against his, leaning into his body. his hand moves to hold your waist, gripping too tightly before he decides to hover his hand over your side. the kisses are slow at first, getting used to each other. his lips are soft against yours, his hand deciding to move up to cup your face instead.
haechan gains a bit more confidence as he moves his lips faster against yours. he’s quick to whine against your mouth, tongue licking against your lips. it’s almost embarrassing how fast you are to give into him, feeding into his desperation. you can feel how his hand feels clammy against your face, your hand moving to intertwine with his.
when you pull away to catch your breath, you laugh at how his glasses have fogged up. he whines in embarrassment, moving to sit himself against the headboard of the bed. he spreads his legs a bit, inviting you to sit on his thighs. you crawl over to him, an innocent smile on your face as he watches your every movement. 
as you place yourself on his thighs, you look down on him, his pretty eyes looking up to yours. your hand places itself on his cheek, tracing along the moles that you always found yourself staring at. he leans into your touch, mumbling more to himself, “i never thought i’d get to have you like this…”
“we have all the time in the world now,” you lean down to give him a peck on his lips, “we can do anything we want.”
his hands are hesitant when they hold you by your waist, bringing your body closer to his. he sits you right on top of his bulge, feeling how he’s already hard from just some kissing. you giggle to yourself, letting your chest press against his as you kiss him again. one of his hands slip under your shirt, hand warming the skin at your side.
his hips begin to shift under yours, his hand trailing higher and higher before it stops at the cup of your bra. he pulls away from you a bit, his hooded eyes and puffy lips letting you know what he wants. you nod at him before kissing him, his hand moving to cup your chest. his other hand joins, both hands now groping at your covered chest. 
he licks into your mouth, hands moving harder against you. you can feel his cock poking against your thigh, smiling into the kiss. your hand slips under the waistband of his sweats and boxers, touching his leaking tip. his whole body has a reaction, head tilting back as he lets out a moan. he tries to swat away your hand, and you try to argue, “i wanna make you feel good, too.”
“b-but i’ll-” a whimper leaves him this time, “i’ll cum if you keep touching me like that-”
you try to hold back your laugh, ultimately failing when you see the embarrassed look on his face. he whines before grabbing both of your wrists, pushing you down flat on your back. he hovers over you, eyes filled with desperation as he openly stares at you. his hands tug at the hem of your shirt, asking for permission to take off your shirt. 
you agree, watching him slide it off of you with your help. he’s met with the sight of your bra, hands shakily moving to take hold of your chest. he touches you how he likes, a dazed look on his face as he gets more greedy. “you don’t know how much i thought about this… just wanted to touch you here so much…”
your hands fumble to undo the clasps at the back, sliding your bra off so haechan can get a better look. he moans unabashedly,  immediately moving to mouth at the valley of your chest. he’s leaving marks as he pleases, making it to your nipple and sucking harshly. his other hand pinches at the other nipple, causing you to let out choked whimpers. 
your legs twitch at his hips, forcing him to stay in between your legs. you can feel how his hips grind down, mindlessly chasing his own pleasure. “you can probably get yourself off just like this, right? i can see you humping the bed.”
“fuck, i can’t help it. you’re so hot,” he mumbles against your skin, “i could make you feel good all day, that’s all i need.”
as if something goes off in his mind, he’s quick to begin trailing kisses down your body. your skin jumps at the feeling, his eyes peering up at yours. he unbuttons your shorts and pulls them down, not caring how rough he’s being. it’s quiet in the room when he sees you in just your underwear, his heavy breaths filling the air. his nose nuzzles against the seat of your panties, a chill running up your spine when you can feel him breathe in deeply.
he slowly pulls your panties down, his eyes zeroed in on your core. he holds the panties in his hands, looking back at you, “you said you’d let me keep these, right?”
you laugh at him, feigning disgust when he asks, “you’re so gross! but i did make a promise, right?”
there’s a giddy look on his face when he pushes them away for later. he focuses on what’s more important, your open legs inviting him to where he’s been fantasizing the most. he settles down between your thighs again, pressing quick kisses to your inner thighs. he feels them try to close in on him, one of his hands moving to keep one leg pried open. 
he takes a breath before looking at your core. he swipes a finger down your slit before sticking in his mouth. a moan follows, “you taste so sweet. fuck, it’s better than i imagined…”
it takes no time for him to press a kiss to your clit, sucking lightly as you let out a low moan. it’s easy for him to bring you closer to his face, spreading your cunt apart with his thumbs as his tongue licks at your entrance. all you can hear is how loud he’s being, the slurps of him against your cunt and the moans he’s letting out get to your head.
his tongue focuses at your entrance, switching between sticking the tip of it in your entrance and licking up at the slick that comes out. his thumb circles your clit, pressing hard against it causing you to twitch in his hold. his hand gives up on trying to keep your leg open, choosing instead to move up and tug at your nipple.
your thighs begin to shake around his head, feeling his fluffy hair tickle your thighs. when his tongue moves to tease your entrance again, you clench around it. he moves slightly away, eyes gazing up at you in wonder, lips and chin glossy with how wet you are. he licks his lips, “are you-”
you cut him off, “fingers- i need your fingers, haechan.”
he’s quick to comply, moving back to his original spot. his mouth replaces his thumb, now choosing to suck on your clit. there’s a finger at your entrance, slowly pushing in. he grunts against you when he feels you clench again, tongue flicking at your clit. your hands shoot to his hair, threading through the strand as your hips rut against his face.
it’s when you feel his glasses bump against your skin that he lets out an irritated noise. you open your eyes fast enough to see him pull away from you, quickly ripping his glasses off his face and moving right back to your pussy. you wail when he doesn’t add another finger, “n-need more, haechan, please.”
he nods against you, not pulling away as he adds another finger. all the air in your chest leaves as he curls them inside you, hitting spots that you could never reach on your own. he chuckles against you, “who knew that you can be this messy just from me eating you out? made you wait so long, didn’t mean to, baby.”
your hands tighten around some strands of his hair, causing him to whimper against you. the bed shakes a little when his hips grind against the bed. he chuckles lightly, “n-need you to cum already or else i’m gonna cum just by grinding against the bed.”
“keep going and i’ll cum soon. right there, haechan, please.”
your hands press his face closer to you, no longer obstructed by his glasses. his tongue teases your clit, giving you just enough stimulation to have you whining. he can tell you’re close just by how you’re clenching around his fingers. when he looks up at you, his heart beats a little faster with how good you look, and it’s all because of him. he moans out,  “god, you’re so perfect, everything about you is so-”
he’s cut off by your moan, your orgasm crashing into you, clenching hard down onto his fingers. he helps you ride through it, fucking his fingers into you until you start pushing his head away from you. he laughs before you take his wet fingers into your mouth, cleaning them up as you stare right at him.
he’s quiet now, no words coming out of him as you move to peel off his sweats. you eye how hard he is in his boxers, hand moving to palm his clothed cock. he whines, just like before, “please don’t. i will seriously cum right now if you keep on touching me.”
you blink at him, “what’s so wrong with that?”
“wanna do it inside your pretty pussy.”
you lean up to press your lips against his again. it’s desperate this time, tongues moving against each other as haechan holds you close to him. it only takes a bit of grinding against his cock before he breaks, standing up to clumsily pull his boxers and shirt off. in the meantime, you situate yourself against the pillows, haechan practically pouncing on top of you. 
he teases his tip along your slit, tapping it lightly against your sensitive nub. you hiss, your hands reaching for his shoulders, nails digging into his skin. he lets out a hushed whimper at the pain, cheeks red when you let out a laugh. you sigh out to him, “i needed this more than you can imagine. somehow i couldn’t stop thinking about you.”
he presses a kiss to your collarbone, and you can feel how he smiles against you, “what do you mean ‘somehow?’ i like to think that you’re just as obsessed with me as i am with you.”
he teases your entrance with his tip, causing you both to moan. you breathe out, “i can’t believe i let some loser hacker get me like this. you should be glad.”
“i’m the best one in this world, y’know? now tell this loser hacker how much you want him.”
you whine out his name, “please don’t tease… i know you want this as bad as i do, i can feel your cock twitching against me. just wanna feel you deep in me. i know you want it, too.”
he bites his lip to hold back a moan, his body betraying him when his hips push against yours. “a-alright, i know, baby. i’ll make sure to make the both of us feel good, okay? you ready?”
you nod, reaching up to give him one last kiss. you watch as he lines himself up at your entrance, his eyes losing focus. he pushes in slowly, your head pushing into the pillows as you moan out his name. he’s thick, your walls trying to adjust to his size as his head falls to your shoulder, his warm breath hitting your skin.
once he bottoms out, he looks down to see where he’s buried deep inside you. he lets out a whimper, his arms weak as he tries to hold himself up. he lets out a shaky breath, “i don’t- i don’t think i’ll last long…”
“i-it’s okay, just go slow. i can wait-”
he pushes his cock deeper inside you, “no i can- i can move just-”
he feels you clench around his cock for the first time, your walls sucking him in deeper. it’s all too much for him, your warm cunt and your needy little face is just too much. he can’t help it when his cock throbs inside of you, cum shooting deep inside your cunt without any warning. he falls on top of you, biting down on your shoulder to try to hide out the loud whimpers he’s letting out.
you’re not too surprised with how long he’s been holding himself out. he was even teasing himself, grinding against the bed when he was eating you out. you soothe him, hands running up and down his back as he lets out soft cries. you’re fine with it ending here, there’s still much more time you have together.
except, haechan pushes himself back up, cheeks red and eyes filled with tears as he fucks his cock into you again. he lets out a hiss, eyes fluttering shut at the overstimulation biting at him. you can feel how messy it all is, some of his cum slipping out of you and helping him fuck you. 
he’s slow at first, trying to will away the pain. you’re louder than him right now, his cock hitting every spot inside you. you can’t help but wrap your legs around his waist, pulling him in deeper. you cry out to him, “thank you, haechan. fuck, i feel so full!”
whining at your words, he quickens his pace, the pain bleeding into pleasure. “never thought i’d be able to feel you like this, so i-” a moan leaves him when your nails dig into his back, “i couldn’t help myself, had to cum- need to cum inside you.”
“felt so good, i didn’t care. wanna feel you cum again, wanna cum with you this time!”
“i’ll make sure you do, baby.”
he’s so sensitive right now, tears nearly prickling his eyes as he fucks you. he can’t seem to care though, not when your warm walls are clenching around him. not when you call out his name like he’s the only thing you need. how could he care when you’re the only thing he wants in his life?
“you know, i couldn’t stop thinking about this on the ride here. h-had to stop myself from getting hard in a taxi because of you.”
“y-yeah? needed you just as much, touched myself last night because i wanted you so bad.”
he whines at the thought of you stuffing your fingers in your cunt, moaning out his name just because of him. he can feel you shaking under him, wanting nothing more than to cum. “i’m here for you now, gonna give you everything you need. gonna stuff you full of my cum again.”
your hands bring his head down to kiss you, your hands softly supping his cheeks as you do. your fingers wipe away at the nearly dried tears, bringing him as close to you as possible. when you pull away for air, he moans out, “came so many times to the thought of having you like this. fuck, all i’m gonna be able to think about is you falling apart on my cock.”
you nod, because he’s all you can think about right now. you can’t think anymore, he’s taken up all of your senses. all you can do is moan out his name, letting him fuck you in the way that he’s always wanted. “haechan, ‘m so close, please-” you cry, “need you to make me cum, wanna cum on your cock.”
he can barely put a sentence together, “yeah, fuck, gonna cum on my cock? gonna show me how bad you need me? have your pussy milk me of all my cum?”
his hand reaches down to rub at your clit, urging you to cum. “i can’t hold back anymore, baby,” you can feel him throb inside you, “need you to cum, let me cum with you.”
that’s all it takes for you to let out a whimper of his name, cries falling from your mouth as he fucks you to an orgasm. with how you’re squeezing his cock, it doesn’t take long for him to cum again, a high pitched whimper joining your sounds. he cums inside, fucking his sensitive cock inside you to ride out your orgasm.
he collapses on top of you, hot and sweaty as his breaths mix in with yours. you’ve never heard him this quiet, basking in your warmth as he enjoys the haze he’s in. you don’t bother moving, even as he starts to soften inside you. he nuzzles himself against your chest, pressing small kisses on your skin. his voice is barely above a whisper when he speaks, “thank you for everything. i mean it.”
you let out a faint laugh, “that’s sweet. i didn’t realize you could be this nice. thank you for giving me a chance.”
“i told you i was romantic. you were just too obsessed with me to notice.”
“you’re weird,” you scoff.
“you like it.”
“i do.”
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when you both have time, you take turns on choosing places you both want to go to. haechan always offers to pay for any traveling fees, laughing when you suggest he’s practically your sugar daddy. after many months of meeting like this, it’s easy for you to confess to him. it’s even easier for him to wrap you in his arms, a kiss pressed to your cheek as he tells you feels the same way.
now, you’re both due for another trip. there was more of a wait between now and your last trip, finding yourself just as busy as haechan. when you finally have time to yourself, you realize that it’s your turn to choose a place to visit. you find yourself looking at a quieter city to indulge both you and haechan’s homebody trait.
of course, haechan makes it possible for you both to head over. when you had originally brought up the city, haechan showed some hesitance. when you question him, he responds with, “well… i have a friend over there.”
you ask if you can meet his friend, and after some thinking, haechan decides it’s okay for you two to meet. 
when you both walk around the city, exploring the shops they have to offer, you can tell haechan’s mood shifts. his eyes begin to scan around the small crowds of people, making sure no one is looking too hard at the both of you.
when you make a turn to another street, you’re met with a bigger shop, right in the middle of a junction. haechan stops you from going any further, letting you know that this is where his friend works. you eye the store, realizing that it’s a jewelry store. he takes your hand in his before stepping in, opening the door for the both of you.
he calls out to someone named mark, waiting near the entrance as you look around. there’s gold jewelry on display and other antiques all throughout the store. before you can ask haechan what this place really is, a man who looks just as young as haechan steps out, his confused face morphing into one of giddiness.
“it’s been forever, man! and is this- is this who you’ve been talking to me about?”
“shut up!” haechan whines, looking back towards you, “this is mark, someone who i work with.”
while mark is complaining about how they’re more than just coworkers, everything is hitting you all at once. you completely forgot that haechan works with other people, and you fully believed everyone else to be hackers. you wonder what a man in a jewelry store contributes to a group overall. you don’t bother asking now, not trying to ruin the reunion of two friends. 
it’s nice watching haechan talk to someone he’s comfortable with. you see a lot of him that you don’t normally see. you let them talk, joining in when mark tells you something to embarrass haechan. it never works out in mark’s favor, though, haechan immediately spilling mark’s secrets to you.
time passes by quickly in the store, mark telling you stories that have happened to him while taking care of the place. eventually, mark gets a call from the store’s phone, pulling him away from both you and haechan.
when the call ends, he sighs and looks at the both of you, “i have to go pick something up from this guy. will you guys be okay if i leave you here for a bit?”
you both nod, watching mark pick up a few things before getting ready to leave. he turns back suddenly before walking out, eyes narrowing at your boyfriend, “no funny business, haechan. i mean it.”
haechan raises his hands in defense, a sickly sweet smile on his face as he tells mark that there’s nothing he should be worried about. mark shakes his head and tells you both goodbye when he walks out. you both watch him walk away from the store, out of his sight.
it’s quiet for a few moments before haechan speaks, “do you think we can fuck in here?”
“haechan! where would we even do that? there’s cameras in here and the whole front is made of glass!”
you watch his eyes glance over the store before watching them land on the door labeled staff only. when you turn to look at him, he’s smiling at you innocently, as if you don’t already know what he’s thinking. you groan, “if you’re alright with a quickie, then okay.”
he takes no time to drag you inside the small staff room, locking the door behind him as he smirks at you, “let’s hurry before mark comes back.”
with haechan, you come to realize that you’re willing to do anything he wants.
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a/n: JESUS i wrote this way too fast and now i have to stay away from google docs for at least a week... but anything for haechan... happy bday to that guy... ALSO THANK U TO @hrts4doie FOR BETA READING HEHE...
tags: @hxxchxn @sourkimchi @hcheach @axo-l0tl @hazyhae @taexoxosgf @hyuckdolle
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swordsandholly · 1 day
Text
Across the Way
Chapter 4: New and Old Problems Alike
Retired!Ghoap x Fem!Fat!Reader
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MDNI | cw: fainting, some medical inaccuracies
Word Count: 5.8k
Summary: You go to Scotland with high hopes for your future. After all, you have the bakery you always dreamed of and a whole new life to live. Plus, the men who own the butcher’s shop across the street seem nice.
You haven’t texted them, even three days later. That little sticky note haunts the surface of your kitchen counter. It taunts you - tells you that you should text them and at least give them your number. That you’re being a terrible neighbor. They might need you too, after all. Even though you can’t figure out why they might for the life of you. On the other hand, you can’t help but feel wary about it. Men don’t take an interest in you - people in general rarely take interest. It’s hard not to feel suspicious, as pure as you’re sure their intentions probably are.
More so than any of that, you don’t know what to say. If it had been day one you could have just put your name, but now you feel like you need to explain. Or at least be funny or something. Tossing and turning on your designated rest day about what the hell you should do.
You’re overthinking it. You know that. You can’t stop, either.
They just seem so cool - so put together. So unlike you. You want to impress them. You don’t want to ruin the first possibility of friends in this new life you’re building for yourself.
Eventually you work up the courage to send off an initial text to each of them. Just to give them your name to save if they so choose - plus an extra thank you to Simon for giving you their numbers in the first place. Something simple and borderline cold. Too cold, maybe? Maybe you sound irritated. You hope not. You just want them to like you. Friends in new places are hard and to have someone around you who gets how it feels to need accommodations would just feel so… lovely. Your phone may or may not go flying onto your bed while you bury your face in your hands out of sheer nervousness.
You don’t expect it to chime about a minute later. Right as you’re staring to calm down, of course. It sends your heart violently pounding all over again.
J >> Bonnie lass!
J >> So glad u texted!!
>> Sorry it took so long lol
Oh, you could just slap yourself. You don’t have anything better than that? At all? Christ.
J >> Nah Nah
J >> No worries
J >> Actually I was wondering if u would mind if I came by tomorrow
J >> Just to chat
J >> need an excuse to get out of the house
“How the hell does he type that fast?” You scoff to yourself.
>> Yeah, come by anytime.
>> totally
>> yea sounds cool
>> rad, man
A message from Simon pops up mid your internal battle with how to respond, replying with a simple thumbs up. Very in character, you think. He knows how to be nonchalant. What would Simon say? Something casual, maybe a little formal.
>> If you like. You’re always welcome.
Okay maybe that was too much like Simon. You sigh heavily m before adding,
>> I’m trying out a new blueberry loaf
>> If you want to test for me :)
Better. That’s a little better. With another heavy sigh you decide to drop your phone into your nightstand for the rest of the day. Your heart really cannot handle this much emotional pressure.
~~~
You sort of end up just forgetting about the texts. With your phone out of sight and out of mind upstairs in your apartment it almost catches you off guard when Johnny comes striding through the door just before close. He’s dressed more casually than the last couple of times you saw him - having broken out the summer shorts and a graphic tee for some band you don’t recognize. It suits him, though.
“Hey, bon.” He grins.
“Hey.” You smile back, finishing with putting up your stocking baskets before dusting off your hands and turning around. “Simon closing up?”
“Aye.”
You hum. “Come on back, I’ll get you a slice of that loaf I mentioned.”
Johnny follows you quietly. Uncharacteristically quietly. That’s okay - you don’t have a problem with hanging out in silence. It doesn’t feel tense, surprisingly enough. He leaves Riley out front again. Should you get her a dog bed? Maybe if he comes by consistently. That would be nice. Maybe that’s wishful thinking.
“It’s sort of a pound cake but fluffier. I might make an icing for it but I don’t know if that would be too sweet…” You trail off, focusing on plating up the piece. You’re not sure what compels you to try and make it pretty for him. Probably something you could blame on your grandmother. She did have an obsession with presentation.
Johnny hums loudly after taking a bite, talking around the mouthful. “Y’should totally make an icing.” He swallows roughly. “Si would go crazy fer this.”
“Oh?” You smile. “I’ll send some home with you.”
There’s a lapse of silence while Johnny chews on his slice of bread and you pack up some in a paper bag for him to take home. The only sounds in the room comprised of your cutting and folding and the hum of the cooling oven.
“You’re being weirdly quiet.” You blurt, immediately covering your mouth with your hand. “I, uh, I mean that isn’t a bad thing! I don’t mind… I just, uh, was… sorry, never mind…”
“Well I did come wit’ a bit of an ulterior motive…” Johnny admits, glancing off to the side shyly. It’s a show, you think. Johnny doesn’t seem the type of man to have felt shy a day in his life.
You tilt your head. “Oh?”
He dusts off his hands and grins. “Let us take ye out! In celebration of yer first full month.”
Has it been a month already? “Oh - no, no you don’t have to-“
“C’mon! It’s a big accomplishment.” His smile is so bright that you almost believe his idea that you’ve done something great.
“…alright.” You give a tentative smile. It’s hard to believe they like you enough to want to hang out casually in the evening. Hard to imagine anyone liking you that much but you’re not one to look a gift horse in the mouth.
“There’s a pub down the street - the one on the corner. Want tae meet us there around six?” Johnny gives you that lovely smile. How could you ever say no to a smile like that?
“Okay.”
You spend far too long changing in and out of clothes and fussing with your hair. Up-do’s and buns and braids. A tank top then a sweater then a t-shirt. There’s no reason to feel this stressed over it. It’s not a date or anything. Besides, it doesn’t seem to make a difference. Either way you look like a frumpy dumpling. Eventually you land on jeans and one of your designated ‘going out tops.’ At least it’s a good excuse to wear something other than work clothes or loungewear.
Excitement and anxiety thrum under your skin like electricity as you make your way down the street. You feel painfully nauseous - stopping once or twice just to make sure you aren’t about to throw up for real.
The pub is surprisingly quiet when you enter. Obviously somewhere only real locals hang out - there’s no theme or really any decor in general. Just a bar, some booths and a couple pool tables. You scan the floor a few times, not seeing either Johnny or Simon (not that they would be hard to miss). Eventually you just grab a soda from the bar and slide into one of the booths closer to the back. A quiet spot facing the door where you can easily watch for them.
As time ticks on you begin to grow increasingly nervous. Did you get the time wrong? No, no you triple checked. You even wrote it down in your planner. Your leg begins to bounce furiously, heart nearly beating out of your chest. Did they decide to ditch? You wouldn’t really blame them. They’re way out of your league when it comes to friends. Maybe Johnny had an emergency? Should you call Simon? If he had an emergency it would make sense that they would forget to notice you. What if something really bad happened? What if-
The front door opens and Simon’s wide frame strides through, holding the door for Johnny and Riley to come in behind him. You let out a quiet sigh of relief, willing your leg to stop bouncing with a pinch to your thigh. Why are you always so damn dramatic?
Johnny lights up with an ear to ear grin when he spots you, bee-lining for the booth while Simon casually walks up to the bar. It’s almost comedic, the way he dwarfs the counter. Johnny leans on the side of the booth, waiting for Simon, you think.
“Glad ye could come out.” He looks you over, eyes flicking from your plain top to the very practical, not at all stylish up do that you landed on for the evening.
You do your best not to squirm under his gaze. “Me too…”
Simon comes back with two beers in hand and slides them onto the table. He scoots into the inner booth to give Johnny the outer edge. Riley happily sits beside his leg and practically grins at you in a near mirror image of Johnny’s. You’d never do it while she’s on the job, of course, but part of you wants to give her a pat on the head and coo at her for being so polite.
Johnny gives you an apologetic smile. “Sorry we were a bit late-”
“Johnny redid his hair about five times.” Simon butts in, not reacting at all to Johnny’s sputtering protest. He glances at your half-drunk soda. “Want me t’ grab you a beer?”
“Oh, no, I’ll just stick to coke.”
They blink at you. Simon cocks his head slightly. “You sure?”
You chew your lip. “Uh, alcohol tends to aggravate my symptoms is all...”
“Then why’d ye agree to drinks? We coulda gone somewhere else.” Johnny frowns.
You shrug. “I don’t mind. I… maybe this is over sharing but I’d rather go out and be kind of normal than just… not ever. Y’know?”
His expression softens. For having such icy blue eyes they are so, so warm. “I get it.”
“How’d you two meet anyway?” You blurt, taking a left turn to get the conversation off of you. It’s the first question that comes to mind. Maybe it’s rude - maybe you’re prying too much already.
“Military.” Simon grunts. “SAS.”
“Si retired wit’ me after I was discharged.” Johnny points to his scar the same way he did when you first met. “Russians scrambled my egg a bit.”
“Couldn’t do the time apart…” Simon murmurs, eyes locked on Johnny’s face. It’s vulnerable. More than he’s used to - you can see it in the way he tenses after saying it.
Something passes between them that a deep, wounded part of you desperately wishes to understand.
You can’t help but start giggling to yourself. They both give you an incredulous look. “Sorry, sorry - it’s just, that’s like… totally a romance book premise. It’s sweet. Really.”
“Och, aye. Wouldn’t know it t’ look at him but Si’s a real romantic.” Johnny bats his eyes at the other man, who just rolls his in response. The corner of his scarred mouth quirks up subtly.
“SAS…” You repeat, staring at your drink. “That’s like Navy Seal shit, right?”
“We worked with them a few times, yes.” Simon nods. There’s an air of ‘do not ask anything more specific’ in his voice.
“Huh.” You take that for what it is and sit back, squinting at them. “You don’t look it, honestly.”
Johnny laughs. “Tha’s just cause ye havennae seen Simon with his gear on. The Ghost.” He wiggles his fingers along as he makes a stupid, spooky sound effect. “I domesticated him.”
Simon scoffs but doesn’t deny it, just takes a quiet sip of his beer.
“Riley’s a vet, too.” Johnny pats her head. “Got too skittish around loud noises but she transitioned into a service dog nicely.”
“Now she’s just spoiled.” Simon rolls his eyes in faux annoyance. You get the strong feeling that he’s the one doing the spoiling.
You find yourself relaxing as the night goes on. Slouching in your seat rather than sitting ramrod straight and nervously twiddling your thumbs. They never press you to drink, never insist that you’ll be fine with just one. They take your statement as fact and it isn’t brought up again. That shouldn’t be as significant as it is, now that you think about it.
Johnny’s words begin to slur a little bit on his fourth, no maybe fifth, beer. You aren’t sure. It’s very cute, the little blush that forms across his cheeks. Simon loosens up, too. He slings an arm around the back of the booth and Johnny readily tucks himself into the open spot. You find yourself wondering about their military career again. You can’t picture either of them committing violence - especially Simon. Sure, he’s big and gruff but he looks at Johnny so, so softly.
Simon is the one to call it a night - though you have a feeling its because you nodded off a couple times. Not out of boredom, you try really, really hard to pay attention to Johnny rambling about the chemistry of different explosives. He makes it interesting, somehow. Really it’s just that you’ve been awake for… holy shit almost twenty hours!
“D’you need a ride?” Simon asks as you exit the pub, hands firmly shoved into his pockets.
“No, I’ll be fine.” You don’t know how to interpret the look he’s giving you. It’s intense, but not annoyed or displeased. He has such a weird knack for unreadable but distinct expressions. You wonder if you’ll ever get close enough to get good at deciphering them.
You jump when Johnny takes both your hands in, kissing the backs of them with a sloppy, drunk smile. “Thank ye fer comin’ out. “
Somehow your face feels hotter than a damn oven. You tuck your hands to your chest, kicking shyly at the sidewalk. “Th-thanks for the invite. We, uh, we could do it again sometime?”
You glance up hopefully, praying that you didn’t misread the situation. You’ve done that before - thought people liked you more than they did. Johnny just grins wider somehow and nods excitedly.
You watch them walk off in the other direction, hand in hand. Johnny giggles about something loudly and you can see Simon’s shoulders shake with a far more silent laugh. All the way until they disappear down the street.
The sheer amount that the image hurts your heart makes you feel evil.
~~~
The pub changed something. What, you don’t know. Either way, you fall into an easy pattern with Johnny and Simon over the next couple weeks. Exchanges of food, leftovers or morsels about to turn, little visits back and forth between your shops. Johnny continues to stop by after close, just hanging around with you while Simon closes up shop.
You can’t deny how much you look forward to hearing that door chime followed by a too-loud greeting from Johnny. How your heart flips in your chest when those bright blue eyes peek around the corner into the back room or light up while trying a new recipes you’ve been testing. You’re still a bit awkward - unsure how to react when he throws an arm around your shoulders or listens oh so intently while you talk about nothing important.
Things can’t ever be all sunshine and rainbows, though. Not for you. A new problem has arisen as summer truly sets in - the comfortable spring breezes giving way to nothing but bright, unfiltered sun. One you didn’t expect to impact you this much living this far north.
Heat.
It’s hard to breathe in the back room while you’re baking. Hard to keep your water and salt intake high enough to compensate for how fast you lose them. You might as well get a permanent saline drip attached to you at this point. You definitely didn’t google if that was physically possible. Your budget for liquid IVs and other supplements nearly doubles. Standing over the massive oven in the back room has your head swimming a few times. You end up resting longer on your weekends, unable to keep up like you could in cooler weather.
It’s okay, you tell yourself, the summer here isn’t like back home. It will pass quicker. Plus, you at least have methods of dealing with it now other than crossing your fingers and praying.
“Bonnie!” Johnny suddenly appears in your doorway - that charming smile splitting his face from ear to ear. “Ye made it up Main Street yet?”
“No?” You tilt your head and try to ignore the way your vision spots momentarily at the motion. “Why?”
“Ye dinnae hear about the summer festival?” He leans on your counter. You shake your head. “It’s a yearly thing. Not that big a deal but they have some fun games an’ it’s nice tae see everyone out an’ about. Si an’ I are about tae head down. Come wit’?”
You hesitate. The exhaustion in your body tugs at your spine. Your limbs feel heavy. This morning really got to you - out of towners who must have come for the festival flooded your shop the moment it opened on top of your Saturday regulars. Not that you’re complaining, really. It’s easily your best day so far. You want to go with them, though, despite the ache in your back and the sting in your joints. It sounds so fun and it’s never a bad idea to take part in your new community’s festivities.
“Yeah. That sounds nice.” You smile. You can tough it out for an hour, then come back home. Yeah, just an hour. You’ll be fine.
You hadn’t noticed Simon leaned up at the entrance to your shop. Your eyes lock on his arms. This is the first time you’ve actually seen him in short sleeves. You can’t help but stare at his half-sleeve tattoo - all skulls and bombs and other military motifs. Faded and sun worn. Yeah, if you’d seen that sooner you definitely would have picked up on the whole military thing. You bite your lip to keep from snickering about it.
You can hear the music drifting from the speakers down the street. A few kids run by with balloons and cheap carnival prizes. It almost reminds you of the Spring Fling back home, just missing the extreme American flag theming across every booth and vendor front. Now that you’re looking around, you can actually see several booths that have been sponsored by various businesses in the area. Even the post office has a snow cone stand. The deeper you get into the event, the more flamboyant the decor becomes. Multicolored streamers and pennet flags connect stands, creating an almost canopy effect.
Simon stops rather abruptly at a booth, waiting behind a few teenagers tossing rings onto bottles. You stop with Johnny about two feet away. What’s he thinking? Simon doesn’t seem like the type who would be too entertained by basic carnival games. Even so, he steps forward and passes over a couple bills to the vendor as soon as the teenagers leave.
“Si’s really good at these. Watch.” Johnny grins beside you.
“Aren’t they rigged?” You raise an eyebrow.
Johnny doesn’t answer, eyes locked on his husband as he lines up one of the rings. You have to lean slightly to see around the breadth of the man - the multicolor rings almost cartoonishly small in his hands. Cute. Your eyes get impossibly wide with each toss, every single one landing comfortably on the bottle necks as if it’s the easiest thing in the world. As if this isn’t one of the most commonly rigged carnival games.
“Holy shit…” You mutter, still staring.
“Aye, tha’s a SAS sniper for ye.” Johnny laughs. “Glad tae see it still comes in handy.”
Simon huffs out a quiet laugh at that. Almost more of a sigh if it weren’t for the shaking of his shoulders. You love it - their little dynamic. The bond between them that’s so strong it’s almost visible.
“‘ere.” Simon turns to you suddenly, holding out a cheap little carnival prize. You can’t even begin to decipher what it’s supposed to be - some sort of furry puff ball with big, embroidered anime eyes and two felt antennae sticking up out of it’s purple head… body… thing…
Your face heats. “F-, uh, me?”
He shrugs. “Suits you. Riley will just chew it up if we take it home.”
“Aye. She’s so good with everythin’ but cheap plushies.” Johnny snickers.
You glance down at the dog in question - her dark eyes glued to the toy in Simon’s hand. Her tail thumps against the ground where she sists dutifully, but you can see the desire to snatch the thing away in her twitchy ears and pleading eyes. You snort, taking the stupid thing and tucking it under your arm with the prayer that they don’t notice the heat now spreading from your cheeks to your ears.
“Thanks…” you murmur, already mentally deciding where to add it to the mess of stuffies covering your bed already.
Somehow you end up walking between them down the street - Simon on your left and Johnny on your right with Riley in tow. You stop at a few other games here and there. All pretty basic. Johnny absolutely kills at the dunk booth.
Simon tires his hardest to help you with your terrible aim, “Just visualize it. Y’have t’ account for the arc.”
You get to the point of sticking your tongue out in concentration. Even so you only manage to knock down a couple of the wooden ducks at the ‘Dunk-A-Duck’ stand. You do, however, win one of those rock candy sticks at the guessing booth. You just hand it off to Johnny. It’s probably not best to load up on sugar in your current state.
Johnny excitedly points to different buildings giving you a rundown of the history of his hometown as you walk. Simon seems to barely be listening. He’s probably heard this a thousand times. Prattling on about the old town square, the church bell that a bunch of teenagers spray painted one time (Johnny was not involved, how could you accuse him of that?)
You find yourself focusing on your feet - keeping each step even and fast enough to remain on pace with them. One, two, one, two, one, two. The air begins to thicken. Muggy and heavy on your skin. Your breaths become shallow and fast. You can’t catch it, the air seeming to get stuck in your throat rather than reaching your lungs. Spots begin to dance across your vision. You stumble over nothing.
Not now! Come on! You’ve been doing so well!
Riley presses against your leg acting as a counter weight. Your body moves on instinct to grab whatever you can - hands wrapping around something strong and covered with cloth. An arm solid as rebar. Hopefully it’s someone you know. All you can see are colorless shapes.
“Gonna pass out - don’t freak!” You gasp before your legs give out.
It’s not that you go entirely out - it’s rare that you fully black out. It’s more like being stuck. Limp and fuzzy and confused. Almost like sleep paralysis. There’s voices and people moving around you. Someone has picked you up, you think, based on the swaying motion and the passing shapes around you. Maybe that’s just vertigo. A door bell chimes.
You finally begin to really come to when something icy is pressed to your forehead. It couldn’t have been more than a handful of seconds that you were gone, but it takes much longer for the world around you to come back into focus.
“I’m sorry…” You murmur, eyes stinging. Even after all these years it’s so damn embarrassing. You blink, the distinct mural that decorates the ceiling of the post office slowly coming into view. Johnny said a big time traveling artist painted it back in the nineties.
“Ye alright?” Johnny murmurs, crouched down beside you. Riley sniffs at your hand, seeming satisfied when you finally move it on your own.
You nod slowly. “Overheated…”
“Give her this.” Someone says. An event medic, you think. The boys must have flagged them down. Fingers press to your pulse point, a light shines in your eyes and you follow it. A quick check of vitals. Johnny shoves a water bottle in your hand as soon as the medic decides you’re fine to move - the contents distinctly murky from some sort of electrolyte pack that’s been shaken into it.
“Up y’get. Slowly does it.” Simon helps you sit up with a hand on your back. It’s so gentle. You don’t miss how he cages in your body the way only someone intimately familiar with caretaking might. Fully ready to catch you if you go limp again.
You sip slow, eyes glued to the ground. You feel so fucking stupid. Can’t even walk down a street without creating some sort of scene. They’re never going to want to hang out with you again, are they? You can’t go out drinking, can’t walk around a festival for longer than a couple hours. You distracted Riley. What if something happened to Johnny while you were having your spell? She might not have alerted correctly because of you. She might have gotten confused and then he could have gotten hurt. He might have-
“Ye really should drink tha’ instead of glarin’ at it.” Johnny pulls you from your thoughts. He’s now sat with his legs crossed beside you. Riley’s head rests in his lap. She seems calm. Content now that the emergency is over and happily lying on a cool floor.
You hum, chugging the last bit of it quickly. “I’m sorry…”
“Don’t be.” Simon says curtly. “Does this ‘appen often?”
You shrug. “Not as much anymore… usually my medication keeps me stable.”
“Do ye need a doctor?” Johnny tilts his head slightly. There’s no judgment in his tone - in either of their tones. Just calm concern. It probably shouldn’t make you want to cry as much as it does.
You shake your head. “I’ve got liquid IV at home. Just need to sleep it off.”
Hopefully. In reality, a pain flare up is inevitable now. You just won’t know how bad until you’re fully in it.
“Let’s get ye home.” Johnny says, knees popping as he stands.
“I-I’m fine!” You insist, mentally preparing to get yourself up off the floor. “I can get home on my own - I don’t want to ruin your time.”
Johnny levels his gaze onto you, so serious it almost looks angry. It doesn’t match his face. “We’re not leavin’ ye tae get home alone like this.”
You’re caught off guard when an arm slides under your back and another under knees - lifting you like you weigh half of what you do in reality. Like you’re a paperweight instead of a boulder. You blink up at Simon, far too surprised to be embarrassed. At least at first. You splutter out a poor attempt at convincing him to put you down. Excuse and reason after reason and excuse. They roll off him like water off a ducks back. Your face burns as he steps out of the post office with you neatly tucked against his chest - Johnny and Riley in tow.
If you allow yourself to be honest, to give into that weaker part of you (or, at least, the part you consider to be weak) you could possibly admit that this feels nice. Being cared for feels nice. Having your body up against someone else feels nice. It’s been a long time since anyone touched you outside of a polite handshake or accidental bump. You sink into it despite yourself - relaxing against Simon’s chest. They were right, you wouldn’t have made it back. Your head is too fuzzy and there’s that telltale pain in your shoulders radiating up to your neck that signifies an oncoming Bed Day.
It doesn’t take long with Simon’s lengthy strides to get back to your building. You probably wouldn’t have been able to keep up to that running. Well, you can’t really run much at all so you definitely wouldn’t. A stupid, muddled train of thought that melts into the hazy bog of your current mental state. Even Johnny trails a few feet behind. Neither of them speak, marching in determined silence. You attempt to subtly check their faces for any anger. You’d understand if they were angry. Most people would get angry. You interrupted their day out with your useless drama. All you get is a wide, bright grin from Johnny when your eyes eventually meet his.
Simon puts you down with all the care in the world. As if you’re made of fine china. His hand stays on your upper back - planted firmly between your shoulder blades and ready to catch you if need be. Your vision swims a bit, your joints feel like jelly but you manage to dig your keys out of your pocket and unlock the door.
“Here.” Johnny plops the puff ball back into your hands just as you turn to say goodbye. To say thank you - to apologize profusely.
Your brows raise. You completely forgot about it while swimming around in a sea of embarrassment - he must have picked it up for you. You hug it to your chest with a quiet, “Thanks.”
You shift your weight side to side, psyching yourself up for the crawl up the stairs. Probably literally. You don’t think you could stay upright if you tried to walk them like a regular day, or even with an aid. Like a regular or semi-regular person. Fuck.
Johnny follows your eyes up at the staircase. He must sense some hesitation in you. “Do ye need help up?”
You bite your lip, staring at the ground. Standing in one place seems alright, but the thought of climbing is so daunting, even with the cane you have stationed at the bottom of the steps for that exact purpose. It’s embarrassing. You’re young, you should be able to walk up some damn stairs. It isn’t even that many. It’s barely a full flight. Just one story of stairs for fuck’s sake.
“Hey.” Simon touches your cheek, the action snapping your eyes to his in surprise. “It’s okay. C’mere.”
He picks you up again in the same fashion with barely a grunt, taking his time up the steps so as not to jostle you. How many times has he done this with Johnny? you wonder. That’s the only explanation for how good he is at keeping your equilibrium so even. You wonder if he practiced - if he took caretaking classes. He probably did. Does he keep up at the gym just so he can take care of his husband? Simon might be quiet and a little formal, but he exudes dedication.
“Sorry it’s messy…” You murmur when they reach the top of the steps. Glancing behind you, you see Riley sitting patiently at the bottom. Johnny must have told her to stay. “Haven’t gotten to fully unpack…”
You’ve been spending too much time in bed on the weekends. Fucking lazy.
Johnny just laughs. “Ye shoulda seen the first place Simon an’ I had.”
“Wasn’t that bad.” Simon argues, carefully setting you down on the couch. His hands hold your waist to steady you. They’re so warm… It feels wrong to be disappointed when he lets go.
“We hadnae figured out a system yet.” Johnny huffs, hands on his hips. “We ended up hirin’ a specialized maid service the dishes got so backed up.”
You scoff, laying back against the couch with that stupid carnival prize still in your arms. Like it’s the only thing grounding you to reality. The tears that have been stinging your eyes this entire time continue to threaten to spill - a myriad of blinks and careful breaths the only thing keeping them back.
Johnny sits beside you slowly. You can’t meet his eyes. “Do… do ye want tae tell us what it is? Ye donnae have tae - it’s up tae ye. Just if somethin’ happens again…”
“We’d like to be prepared.” Simon jumps in where Johnny trails off.
You chew your lip, still staring up at the ceiling. It splits and that coppery taste coats your tongue for a moment. “I, uh, it’s called POTS. There’s different types but basically my body can’t regulate blood flow and pressure right…” You shrug. “Like I said my medication usually keeps me mostly okay.”
It’s the pain that really gets to you usually, but you don’t need to start dumping on them about that. There’s no reason to spill your guts about things they can’t fix.
“Thanks fer tellin’ us.” Johnny smiles. You stiffen slightly when he reaches out to tuck some hair behind your ear. You tilt your head, still resting on the back of the couch, to meet his eye. “Get some rest, yeah? We’ll lock the knob behind us. Call if ye need anythin’.”
“Okay.” You nod, keeping your eyes down and picking at your nails. “Sorry… about all this… I didn’t - I don’t… I’m sorry.”
“Donnae apologize.” He says softly as he stands. “Never apologize. We’re your friends, aye? Friends help friends. Tha’s all there is to it.”
Simon gives you a discerning nod behind him, expression both soft and deeply serious.
Friends? They consider you real life proper friends? Really? You can’t help but beam up at him. “Yeah.”
A/N: I’ve re-read this chapter so many times that it’s total mush in my brain which tells me it’s time to be done with it.
Bonus: I made a Pinterest board for this fic
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cry4mina · 21 hours
Text
What You Need
(Pole!Dancing Momo x fem!reader)
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Word Count: 4.4K
Light Angst/Smut
Summary: Momo has been locked in her studio for a week and a half despite your want for her attention. Little do you know, she’s been preparing a surprise for you.
TW: THIS IS MOSTLY FUCKING! Pole dancing, stripping, praise kink, Momo is a bottom (whaaaaaat), face fucking, fingering, and I’m unsure if i missed anything so just be aware of the sex.
A/N: The brain rot was real yall. A thank u to the secret contributor whomst helped me articulate words lmao anyway, DMs and asks are always open! Pls drink water and have a lovely day!
A long sigh leaves your lips while you lay down on the couch and scroll through your phone, switching between the same three apps before you huff again. You’re at home and so is Momo but she’s locked herself in her studio…again. Just like she had for the last week and a half.
Rolling over to one side and opening your messages, only to stare at the one you sent Momo an hour beforehand.
You: I miss you [9:45pm]
You: Can you come upstairs soon? :( [9:45pm]
Of course she didn’t reply. Scoffing in annoyance, you stand. Making your way to your shared bedroom and stripping down to just underwear on the way. Throwing your clothes in the laundry hamper, you stare into space. Bringing your hand up for a moment to wipe the sleep out of your eye momentarily.
It had been 3 hours since you’d seen her. Coming home in a whirlwind, throwing all her stuff to the ground before she kissed you and sped off to the basement studio. With no response to your previous message, you decide to send another.
You: I’m going to bed…let me know when you have time for me, I guess. [10:46pm]
A little passive aggressive for you, sure, but she knew how you’d been feeling. A conversation was had a few days ago about how you felt like she had been held up in the studio and not really spending time with you outside of coming to bed at 3am only to wake up at 8am and leave for her schedule. She said she understood and assured you it would all be worth it in the end…but you missed her.
Slipping into one of her oversized shirts that smelled like her with only panties on underneath, you wash your face and brush your teeth when your phone vibrates on the counter.
Mo: Please don’t go to sleep yet! [10:51pm]
Mo: I have something I want to show you! [10:51pm]
Mo: Give me 10 minutes and then come down to the studio, okay? I love you. [10:52pm]
Spitting the sweet minty toothpaste out and rolling your eyes, you start your skin care routine. Washing your face, dabbing on serums, the whole nine before you head through the living room. Passing the kitchen and head down the steps to the door of the soundproof room added on to the original house after purchase.
This wasn’t a space you ever felt like was yours so you rarely went inside. You remember her having it built into the house before you both moved in together. Only having seen it one time, to view the finished product all decorated and sparkling new.
Momo, of course, stayed with you when the construction workers were in and out of her house for the better part of 4 months. Sleeping in the same bed every night, cooking dinner together, date nights more frequently, having the dogs around, it was all such a dream that strengthened the already strong relationship.
The day the room passed inspection, she took the dogs and went home, worried about being in your space for that long. Not wanting to be a bother. She was always so kind and respectful but the silence of the house without their presence didn’t feel right. Momo called you right as you went to call her that night.
“Hey, uhm…I know it’s late but…I can’t fall asleep…the bed seems too…”
“Empty?”
“You feel it too?…Hey, would you- uhm… Do you want to com-”
“I’ll be there in 10 minutes.” interrupting the sentence before she could finish, beaming at the thought of sleeping next to her another night.
She asked you the next morning while you were tangled in the sheets, cuddling, if you wanted to move in together. You agreed with no hesitation.
Nothing compared to waking up to her everyday. You were missing that part the most as you reminisce on the memories. Sure, it hadn't been that long of a time, but the person who couldn’t fall asleep without you (and the person you couldn’t sleep without) was apparently too wrapped up in whatever was in that studio to be bothered to come to bed. Or hang out on the couch. Or spend any quality time with you.
Even with this, you respected her space. Trying not to be intrusive with her busyness and not going into the studio unless you were invited.
A little intimidated by the unfamiliarity of the room, you turn the knob and quietly take a step before closing the door lightly behind you. The walls are covered in white sheets, opening the space up, with the exception of a few mirrors that were strategically placed along the curtains.
Oak hardwood flooring really brought the brightness of the room together. A small couch and a chair sitting right in front of a silver pole that is bolted into the ground and ceiling beam.
Oh.
Blush covers your cheeks when you realize the purpose of that pole. Walking over to it and grabbing with your hand, you swing around on it, trying to hold your weight up to see how many times you can spin.
A small giggle can be heard through the sheets as Momo reveals herself from behind the curtain. Momo always admired your playfulness. Being able to match her energy was one of the many reasons she fell in love with you in the first place.
You hear the sound of heels against the flooring when you stop yourself from using the pole as a jungle gym, whipping your head towards the noise to see your loving girlfriend…in black thigh high pleasures with clear heels and soles and a black lace lingerie set you had never seen before.
Breath leaves your lungs immediately, you can’t help but gawk at her. Almost drooling, taking in her figure, eyes tracing every single part of her frame, up and then down and back up again. Forgetting to blink completely, absolutely overwhelmed with lust.
Momo smirks at you, running her hands through her hair and letting it fall back into place, slightly lifting her head to expose her neck a little more causing even more of a reaction between your legs.
She knows exactly what she’s doing.
Sashaying towards you, hips fully swinging as she approaches. She wraps her arms strategically on your torso, pressing her body into you. Melting together seamlessly even with the drastic height difference, your hands around the back of her neck when she leans down into you, bringing her lips close to your ear.
“So, you just want some quality time then?” muttered through the tension created in mere seconds. The act sends the warmest chill down your spine and a trickle of neediness onto the fabric of your underwear.
Nodding your head softly and biting your lower lip, any frustration you had disappeared in that moment with the way she guided you back towards the chair. Using her legs to ease you backwards, still holding onto your waist before gently pushing you into the seat she placed right in front of her stage.
Eye level with her waistband, you stare shamelessly at her abs, leaning into press your lips lightly on her stomach while looking up at her, eye dilating as you feel the goosebumps on her skin rise and her breath to cease.
A long exhale and a shutter as she lays her palm flat on your chest, pushing you back against the chair hard enough for the front legs of it to lift a few centimeters off the ground. A warning to let her continue with her plan.
She towers over you, hair framing her face casting the most delicate shadows. She unlocks her phone, swiping up and tapping a few times before tossing it onto the couch that’s against the back wall of the room.
The lights dim and music played low enough to hear the sound of her heels clicking against the wood. The song was hazy, alluring, and unfamiliar, not that you paid any mind to it at all. You are focusing solely on Hirai Momo, who is preparing to give you the show of a lifetime.
Your show.
All for you.
Momo takes a few languid steps around the pole, circling it enough to gain a little momentum before lifting herself up and using her weight to rotate the pole, showing off a variety of different poses as she watches your reactions, giggling at the way you gripped the arms of the chair in desperation.
Pulling herself up and holding onto the metal with her thighs and a single hand, she spins slowly while leaning back, letting her fingers trail between her tits. She falls into her well practiced routine. Her grace and agility intertwining and creating this seductively sensual display of pure strength had you absolutely weak.
Of course, you were very familiar with her body, but you had no idea that this was something she even had interest in utilizing all that muscle for.
A surprise indeed.
Your soft, fluffy, bottom girlfriend was using her body to dance for you in a way you never thought she would. Swinging herself in a way so calculated and so suggestive that it leaves absolutely nothing to the imagination.
It’s almost as if she’s grinding against the pole to taunt you. You’re staring at her attentively, burning holes into her flesh with every second your eyes lay on her. Dripping and clenching around nothing, shifting yourself in your seat to grind down a little and feel some form of stimulation.
The temperature rises within you, leaning back into the chair again to watch your girlfriend closely and see every muscle shifting and flexing. Her arms tensing through her movements makes your mouth and pussy drool for her in tandem.
Momo makes eye contact with you while upside down, legs holding her up on the pole. She slides down quickly, stopping herself before she hits the floor. Momo pulls herself up, swinging her legs around, you hear her knees clammer against the hardwood.
Breath hitching at the intimate display, clenching around nothing as she crawls towards you. So many filthy, vile thoughts race through your mind as her hands slither up your thighs, tracing the hem of your underwear, just to tease.
Gulping harshly as she uses your thighs to lift herself into a standing position. She places a finger under your chin and lifts it so your eyes connect again, lust blown eyes seer your vision. Canceling out everything but her.
Momo leans down teasingly close to your lips. Mouth chasing after hers in an attempt to meld together in an act of desperation. She’s sure to pull away but continues to stay close enough to keep you in her grasp. That devilish smirk paints itself on her face before she turns around, exposing her bare ass to you through her thong.
Oh, fuck.
Momo lowers herself onto your lap, slowly rolling her hips to the rhythm of the song. Your hands have a mind of their own, traveling up to her hips, taking in the texture of the lace and how it hugged her skin so perfectly.
A soft moan can be heard over the song playing. Momo’s hands fly to the thin arms of the chair to keep her level, rutting her hips a little harder onto you.
She lifts herself off you slowly, turning around to place her hands on the arms of the chair again, leaning over you as her arms squeeze her breast together with a very specific intention in mind.
Momo strategically places one of her legs between your knees before you go to cross them. She knew you'd have a hard time keeping still through her choreography. She wanted your face covered desperation and you dripping out of pure need for her touch. Completely at her mercy.
“You should take these off” hooking her fingers into your waistband to let you know it wasn’t a request. Sliding your underwear off hastily, tossing them out of view and finally connecting your lips.
Hungrily reaching out for her, practically losing yourself in her, your movements mirror each other's passion. Lips fused together, erratically fumbling through the open mouthed kissing and steamy lap dance.
Momo tries to kneel down in front of you, catching her before her knee can hit the ground and tugging her thong down to her ankles.
“I was enjoying that lap dance…” purred into her mouth.
“Maybe you should…keep going”
She kicks off her underwear and straddles your thigh letting you feel how much she wanted this. How much she wanted you.
This might have been her stage, but this was your show.
Her hands creep around your shoulders, pulling you tightly into her chest. The familiar scent of peaches and vanilla slowly eases any unwelcome tension. Your hands are on her hips when you pull her closer. Dragging her wet pussy across your thigh as you flex and coerce a groan from her.
“What was that?” teasingly inquiring, pushing her back just to slide her forward again. This time, a little rougher than before.
Momo clutches herself to you, resting her head on your shoulder while you set the pace for her to continue on. She whimpers into you, continuing to rut her hips on you while you mess with the clasp attached to her bra, undoing it quickly to expose her chest.
“Fuck, please…” whispered, removing the last of her lace leaving her in only those black thigh high pleasers.
Laying perfectly placed kisses down her neck until you reach her chest, taking one of her nipples in your mouth, rolling it around and flicking it with your tongue. Being unable to remove your hands from her, sliding one around her lower back and the other reaching for the boob that has had no attention, completely immersing her in your touch.
Music still haunts the background as Momo’s slick saturates your thigh, feeling it drip down the sides of your leg makes the knot in your stomach build. You wanted her so badly, you needed her, and craved the closeness she was finally giving to after what felt like years.
Removing your mouth from her nipple with a pop and ravenously bringing your lips up to hers, returning to the deep depths of lust that both of you were submerged in.
Scooting her backwards off your knee, you place a hand on her inner thigh, giving her the signal to spread her legs apart enough to straddle you. Lips never parting each other, tongues still intertwined through the waltz done out of pure need.
Her hand weaves through your hair on the back of your head, teeth bearing down on your bottom lip before playfully tugging on it and letting go. The pressure of her teeth causes you to moan, cunt dripping onto the chair the heated moment was taking place in.
“How badly do you want it, baby?” Momo’s hips buck at the question, you already know the answer but watching her squirm and beg for it was a delicacy on its own.
“Please…I need you. Please. Touch me.” desperately whimpered between her ragged breathing.
“Where do you want me to touch you?” You’re trying to play it off collected, even with a flushed face and the light movement of your own hips against hers.
Running your hands up her thighs, she leans into you exposing her neck. A silent ask. Open mouth kisses trailed up from her collar bone to her jaw. She’s panting at the gliding of your hands, up and down her thighs in deliberately slow, steady movements. Allowing your hands to dip between her legs and graze over her cunt.
An intense gasp is let out from her perfectly plump lips.
“There! Touch me there. Please, baby…I- I need to f- fuck -feel you”
“Good girl. You’re always so perfect for me.” a drop of her slick falling onto the chair into the puddle of your own as your hand approached her core.
Middling finger sliding up and down her absolutely soaked slit, just to tease her. Being sure to put the slightest pressure on her entrance and eliciting the most vile sound from her. She immediately tries to slam herself down on your fingers.
“Inside…I need you inside…fuck, baby, please!” her hands grip your face, fingers tightening around your lower jaw. Panting as she forces eye contact.
“Look at what you do to me, darling…oh, fuck” losing the grip on your chin and letting her hand trail down your chest, tugging in the sweater chasing your hand with her hips.
“Can’t you feel how much I want you?” mouths connecting passionately through the begary displayed.
Momo’s nails dig into your shoulders through the fabric of her stolen sweater when your teeth find her neck, biting down and entering soaking pussy with a single finger. Palm against her clit so she has something to grind into as you curl your fingers up, hitting her g-spot perfectly.
“Fuck…f- feels so g-good…need -oh my god- more…” jerking her hips to get more stimulation.
Pulling out momentarily to add another finger, she grabs your shoulders harder, using your palm to accentuate the build up of her orgasm.
Bites and hickeys lay across her chest which is heaving unevenly, spilling grunts and groans at the touch of your finger tips. Wetness coats your entire hand, continuing to thrust into her while using your hips as leverage to hit just a little deeper into her.
“I’m gonna cum! -Fuck, please-...c- can I cum?” Panted through her whines. She starts losing control of her movements, attempting to keep herself off the edge until you say that it’s time for her to release.
“Princess, you want to cum?” whispered softly to her, slowing your strokes with each word stated.
“And what if I’m not done with you?” removing your hand from inside of her.
Lifting her while holding her thighs, she crosses her legs around you. Making out while you turn, placing her down lovingly in the chair that she had originally set up for you. kneeling down in front of her.
Momo is half awestruck and half feral when she sees you rip her sweater off you, leaving you both completely naked. You yank her to the edge of the seat and bury your fingers deep inside her cunt again with no warning.
Moaning into the air, lifting her legs on your shoulders, the latex grips against your skin, almost anchoring her in place. Your mouth travels up her thighs with soft gentle pecks and light bites. Momo’s inner thighs coated in the dew drops of yearning, humming into the love bites as your tongue dances to sample her flavor before devouring her.
One long lick up her pussy before immediately attacking her clit. Her hands fly up and grip your hair, the overstimulation causing sweet moans and curses to reverberate off the walls.
“Right there right there right there, please -fuck- oh my god” her hips gyrating into your mouth, the neediness becoming more aggressive, returning to the edge of ecstasy.
“Tell me, princess. Does my good girl want to cum for me?.” Locking you into place with her legs and pulling you closer to her.
“Please, fuck, right fucking there unghh” the wet squelching sounds her pussy was making for you had you close to cumming untouched, knot tighten at every pump into her.
Her body tenses underneath you, grip tightening in your hair while she writhes under your touch. Unwilling to let go of her, you keep curling your fingers and refuse to stop your tongue from spiraling around her now very sensitive clit.
Momo’s face is beat red, hair sticking to her neck and forehead and panting in patterns that mimic hyperventilation. She pushes your forehead from her before finally relaxing her body into the chair.
A smile creeps across your face, being sure she’s watching you lick the remnants of her cum off your fingers. You shimmy her legs off your shoulders and the sound her heels hitting the floor almost startles her out of her post-orgasm haze.
“You’re such a good girl for me, baby.” lovingly placing a hand on her cheek before standing and taking a step towards where the pile of clothes was. A tightness encompasses your wrist, pulling you back to Momo.
The devilish glint in her eyes catches you off guard. Squatting down next to her as she still catches her breath, you take her hand and sweep a piece of hair off her forehead.
“You doing okay, honey? Do you need anything?” All she can do is smile through her breathless state.
“That was not how I planned this!” chuckling and fixating on your naked figure crouching next to her.
“Stand up.” halfway barked at you.
Not being one to usually take demands, you stay right where you are. Momo glares into your soul, unable to make you do what you’re told. She rolls her eyes and with a pensive face, rethinks her approach.
Watching the light bulb go off in her head was almost perplexing. What was she going to do? Her pupils dilate as she slinks to the floor next to you. She positions herself on her knees facing you.
“Use my face, baby” sticking her tongue out and angling her head up.
You slingshot up so fast you almost fall over. Catching your balance quickly enough for her not to notice and position your cunt right above her tongue.
So this is how she can get you to listen to her?
She takes the moments to lick the slick off your thighs, trailing her tongue up before laying it flat across your aching core.
Momo grabs your hand and places it on the back half of her head. You weave your fingers into her hair and use her in any way you want.
“Fuck” leaves your lips. Smearing your slick across her mouth like you’ve never had her tongue on you. Frivolously using her like your own personal toy.
She moans into you, vibrations sending you into a spiral of pleasure. Hips grinding harder down onto her warm tongue, you are unable to keep yourself together for longer than a few seconds, untethering completely into a lust driven state.
Feral was an understatement. The ache in your stomach clenching tight for so long and threatening to release every time you skim across her lips.
Momo’s hands grip your hips enough to stop you, a hand slipping between your legs. Her mouth attaches to your clit and her tongue starts circling. Two fingers easily penetrate you, adding another form of pleasure into the already passionate moment.
“Oh my fucking god…Momo, fuck” whimpering down at her.
Arrogant glimmer in her eyes sparkle while the pattern of circles spirals on, fingers curling up and quicken in pace.
Dripping down her chin and hands, you’ve lost all control. Euphoria creeps in, sprinkling tiny bursts of heat through your skin.
“Baby, I’m gonna cum…hmmmph- oh shit, I’m gonna fucking cum!”
A flash of warmth throughout your body as you clench around her fingers, aggressively thrusting your hips. Muscles tensing involuntarily, moaning loudly and holding your breath as you cum into your girlfriend's mouth.
Gasping for air and trying to keep your balance was challenging. Struggling to keep your legs locked as she continued to lick and suck, no matter how sensitive you already were.
Wet fingers come behind your thighs to keep you up and stable, nail gripping you as she locks you into place above her. A devious look smeared across her face with your cum, continuing to harshly suck and lick into you.
The overstimulation is causing an erratic need to keep going, almost painful, twitching at every pass of her tongue.
“Hurts so good” hissed between the heavy breathing and groans of ecstasy.
Momo aggressively slurps and siphons every ounce of tension out of you. Forcefully eating her dessert while it gripped her hair and praised her. Smiling into your cunt as she ripped another aggressive orgasm from your body.
Trembling above her as she holds you up, she’s smitten with herself as you twitch and convulse by her hands and mouth.
Reaching around and sliding the chair behind you before you fall down. The powerful jolt of endorphins she coaxed out of you reeling throughout your body once more, sending you backwards into the chair as you heaved and tried to regulate your breathing.
A grin crawls across Momo’s beautiful face gazing up at you. Zippers unzipping and the clunk of heavy shoes against wood snap you back from the fucked out daze you were in.
Sighing heavily, craning your neck over to see her standing next to you with her hand out towards you.
“Time for bed?” Questioning while closing her fist and opening it again, to non verbally ask for your hand.
A soft smile paints itself on your face, lazily throwing your hand into hers before closing your eyes again.
“Did I wear you out? Come on, baby.” Tugging your arm playfully and giggling at how successful her plan was.
Groaning as she pulls, you stand up and take a step, legs still shaking from exhaustion. Smooth soft skin hits your calf and your lower back as you’re picked up bridal style.
Nuzzling into her neck as she carried you out of the studio and to your shared bedroom. Laying you down in your spot on the bed and tucking you in before taking a half a step away.
Whining out to her without opening your eyes, you put your arms up for her to crawl into. A fluttery laugh is heard from the end of the bed when you feel the covers shift again.
A warmth fills your chest and sinks you into such a relaxed state as Momo crawls over top of you, finding her place by your side and cuddling into you. Her arm around your torso and her nose buried into your neck.
“I love you, y/n. I’m sorry if I’ve been absent these past few days…I just wanted to surprise you.” A hint of sadness in her tone takes you a little off guard. She would never intentionally make you feel ignored or unimportant.
“I love you too, honey. I was grateful for that surprise. Please do that whenever you want!” Reassuring her that everything was just fine and you two were perfect, as usual.
You feel her smiling into your skin before she pecks your neck softly a few times before snuggling into you further. Her deep even breaths followed shortly as she lulled into a peaceful sleep, with you not too far behind.
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dronebiscuitbat · 18 hours
Text
Oil is Thicker Then Blood (Part 18)
N was peacefully in sleep mode, wrapped around something he inherently wanted to protect, whatever it was, it was pleasantly cooler than the rest of his body, and he found himself bringing it closer to him.
“En! En! En!” A small little voice chirped into his audio receptors, but even still he remained in sleep mode, where all that was active was his most base code.
That voice was no threat, it was the opposite, it meant love and protection, it was someone who belonged with him, no need to panic, no need to disrupt recharge.
His programming pulled the source closer.
Love. Protect. Mine. Those keyphrases ran on repeat within the part of his system that was always active, always ready to immediately jump into action even when he was asleep.
“Shhh… Tera let your dad sleep…” A second, very sleepy voice met his audio receptors, sending more code running through that system.
Freind. Partner. Love. Protect. Safe.
Still no reason to disrupt charge. Partner not in distress. Offspring not in distress.
“Zi!” He felt something shuffle against him, and the sudden removal of the weight in his arms, finally he snapped out of sleep mode, visor and eyelights popping on all at once in a sudden outburst of conscious thought.
Tera-
“Huh…?” He asked noone, blinking around dumbly, his eyes landed on Uzi, who was currently filling yet another bottle with oil. Tera was unplugged, rolling excitedly in her arms as she impatiently waited for her feed.
“Sorry, I tried to let you sleep.” She said sheepishly, before finishing what she was doing and rolling back down her hoodie, she rubbed her side, apparently all the attention was beginning to make it sore.
“S’okies…” He slurred, still groggy. Dang, what background process was running that had him this out of it?
“Can't believe you have a full size bed and we both used the couch.” She grumbled as she slowly squeezed the oil into Tera’s port, he blushed, oh yeah, they'd cuddled all night…
“Hey the past week's been crazy, you can't blame me for falling asleep.” He defended, not giving into the fact he'd been having a little trouble sleeping without her there.
“Fair.”
Uzi looked disheveled, like she'd just lost a fight or crash landed, her beanie was crooked and her hoodie was lopsided, there were lines under her eyelights that indicated poor sleep.
“How did you sleep?” He asked on instinct, stretching as he splayed out on the couch, he wouldn't lie, it was incredibly comfortable.
“Meh… weird dream.” That was typical for Uzi at this point, “weird” probably didn't describe them very well “terrifying” and “prophetic” was probably a better description.
“Wanna talk about it?” He asked, only for her to yawn and shake her head, she would put it up on her conspiracy board when she was next home, it was way easier to sort out that way.
“I'm good.”
N looked slightly concerned, he hoped she wasn't bottling in any emotions, she tended to be good at that.
“I got a message from Thad?” She suddenly said, although it was clear she was talking more to herself, N felt his core flip at the mention of the drones name.
Usi had just checked her system messages (and they were nearly always empty) and found several green colored messages awaiting in her inbox.
WID-Thad: Hey Zi, throwing party this wknd, ur still coming right?
WID-Thad: It's gonna b outside. Don't worry, @ nite
WID-Thad: Or r u gonna need a babysitter fr the kid?
The kid? Oh… oh no.
“Thad knows about Tera…” Uzi whispered, living one of her greatest nightmares, how- how did he find out?
“How'd he find out?” N asked as if he read her mind. She wasn't in the headspace to think about that, not when Thad, the least gossipy person she knew, knew about Tera.
“I don't know! I thought I was doing well in hiding it!” She pulled at her hair, eyelights hollow and the feeling of extreme anxiety crawling up her mechanical spine.
Ohnonononononono….
“I mean it's not all bad? What did he say exactly?” N could immediately tell she had started to freak out, and took Tera in his arms, standing up just to put a hand on Uzi's shoulder.
“Uh… if I needed a-uh babysitter to come to his party?” She tried to breathe, maybe it was some sort of weird, oddly coincidental misunderstanding?
“I mean… I would…” He admitted, but that made sense, he was the one who adopted her, that was the main name on those papers, not her.
“Yeah but he asked me that. I'm not- at least not officially!” She stammered, trying to both claim ownership and avoid it at the same time, two juxtaposing desires, to be seen as edgy and mean so that she could protect herself, and all soft and gushy and parental, bragging about her kid.
It was all very confusing.
“It's okay! Maybe it's just Thad?” N offered, smiling like he really, truly meant it.
It was not just Thad.
When Uzi left N's apartment later that day to track down Thad and figure out exactly where he'd found out from. She'd been approached by drones she didn't even know, asking her how the baby was and how N was doing. Like they totally didn't ignore her existence for her entire life.
The entire colony seemed to know. N had just brought Tera home, how has it spread this quickly! And the assumptions! Several drones had asked how long her and N had been together, one had even asked how well her and N's code fit together.
How was she supposed to answer!? Other than how she did, which was a gruff “Bite me, none of your business.” Before she continued her warpath to Thad’s room, a blush slowly but surely growing everytime she was stopped, congratulated, or questioned.
When she did eventually get to the door, she pounded on it with a fury. How the hell did everyone know so soon?!
“Zi? Woah… you look pissed…” Thad opened the door first with a confused smile, then extreme nervousness, glancing from side to side and backing up slowly.
She shoved him wordlessly into his apartment (which was littered with sports memorabilia) and followed him inside, unleashing her tail to close the door behind her with a aggressive smack.
“How the fuck did you find out about Tera?” She asked, so serious that Thad's eyelights gained a few extra lines underneath them.
“Tera? Is that the kids name? It's cute!” He replied, clearly trying to appease her.
Her tail came up to point at him, saliva dripping from it's needle-like teeth, each drip causing his carpet to singe slightly. It's hot organic breath blowing over his visor.
“Wasn't what I asked Thad.” She put a hand on her hip. She wasn't really controlling her tail right now, but she did agree with it's sentiment, less small talk- let's get to the point.
“Right! Right! No need to get the tail involved!” He gulped, backing away from her tail slowly, putting both his hands up in surrender.
“I overheard your Dad talking to some of the WDF! That and Lizzy said she saw you and N walking into his new apartment with a baby! I drew conclusions?!” He stammered out rather loudly. Sweat appearing and falling rapidly down his visor.
“Okay sure, but why does everyone know!” She exclaimed, raising both her hands in irritation and stomping angerly. If it was just Thad she may not have even minded, but it wasn't was it, it was freaking everyone!
“Lizzy is a blabbermouth and your Dad isn't much better…?” He suggested, still attempting to get away from her irate tail, which had begun chasing him as much as it could while still attached to her.
“I didn't say shit Zi! I knew better!” He exclaimed, looking more and more freaked out of the fleshy appendage as it had somewhat backed him up against the wall.
She sighed, groaning as she put her tail away. Of course it was freaking Lizzy!, she didn't even blame her dad for this one, dispite his everything, he kept family matters pretty tight lipped- he probably hadn't said much.
“Dammit… Sorry Thad, I just… didn't want anyone else to find out about uh… her.” Her voice became… not soft but no longer as aggro.
“Hey it's cool. Didn't think you'd ever want kids though, did N wear you down or something?” He chuckled, scratching the back of his head awkwardly, looking at her with an eyebrow raised.
“Uh! No! She's- She's not mine. Er, not mine mine. She's adopted, and N adopted her, not me.” She explained, violet breaching her defenses as she stammered over her words. Dammit not now! Not in front of Thad!
“Oooooh, yeah that… that makes way more sense. He always seemed more the type then you.”
“Y-yeah…” She couldn't help it when her voice lost it's edge. Even when she tried to hide it.
“Lizzy took a picture though, she kinda does look like… yours.” He sent her a photo over short-range, and she immediately brought it up to her view.
And yeah, he was absolutely right.
It wasn't just the fact that Tera had purple eyelights as well (it's not like that was uncommon.) But her and N were looking absolutely enamored with her, she was even gripping onto his arm as they were walking to get a better look.
She uh… did not remember doing that.
She looked back up at Thad, who was smiling warily, trying to look supportive but also looking incredibly nervous.
“Uuuuuuuuugh” A blush had taken over her face again, this time impossible to hide.
So that's how everyone knew… there was a picture floating around. Photo evidence of her being soft and squishy with a baby.
“Uh Zi…?” Thad looked at her with an amused smile, quickly recovering from her threats once noticing her bravado had deflated.
“My life is over…” She replied, looking like she was suffering deeply, her arms drooped to the floor.
“Thats… probably overdramatic.” He chuckled, stepping closer into her personal space, he hadn't been scared of Uzi, not really. He wasn't sure why, but he'd never got the impression she ever wanted to actually hurt anyone as much as just scare them. He knew she could, and the tail was intimidating, but want to? Nah.
“Theres photo evidence of me being-ah!” She yelped, she was also always… dramatic, seemingly overanimated at times, some people found it off-putting, he found it endearing. A nice juxtaposition to his eternal mellow.
“Of you… being, motherly?” He asked with a smirk as she seemed to melt with embarrassment.
“Yes!”
“I don't think that's a bad thing. I mean, has it been bad for you so far?” He asked, cocking his head. Surely it hadn't, she looked happy in that picture, happier then he'd ever seen her before.
“Well uh, no…” She admitted, the people who had stopped her had all been relatively nice… not as mocking as she'd expected.
“I think it looks good on you! You can't be edgy all the time.” He replied, this time a wide smile on his face, honestly, Thad had known about Uzi's soft center for a long while. He had known her right before Nori died, she'd been… much sweeter then. Soft spoken but not shy.
“Yes I can! Bite me!” And there was the shield… oh well.
“Sorry. You're trying to help.” Oh. Now that was new, the Uzi he knew would never apologize for anything, much less for saying “Bite me.”
“No issue. So are you and N…?
“Uh… no, we're not… I'm just helping him take care of Tera, and uh… speaking of.” The way she stammered and sputtered told him a lot. Mostly that she was still hiding something that's for damn sure, but he didn't want to pry.
“Riiiiight…” He said as if he didn't quite believe her, and he didn't. There was no hiding it in that picture. Hell, they looked like they were married, not even just dating, with the soft looks they both had.
“Okay now actually Bite Me!” She shouted as she stomped off, but Thad stuck his head out of his doorway to shout back.
“You better be still coming!”
She grumbled all the way back to N's apartment, still being stopped every once in awhile to be asked questions, either about Tera, or about her relationship with N.
While her first instinct was to still snap at them, she found herself actively beginning to surpress it. None of these people were asking out of any sort of malice or trying to be mean. Some of them even looked genuinely happy for her.
So she answered them, possibly not in the best or friendliest way (her voice was still rough and a little rude.) But she did clear up a few things here or there.
“No N and I didn't have a baby. She's adopted.”
“No, N's on the paperwork, I'm just listed as a caretaker.”
And when she did reach N's apartment and opened the door. She found N on the floor, helping Tera roll around to chase her toy, a wide grin on his face as a peel of laugher escaped his adoptive daughter each time she was boosted forward gently by his hand.
His eyes snapped up to meet her and they immediately softened, and Uzi had to supress another blush.
Now that she knew he liked her, the signs were rather obvious.
“What did you find out?” He asked, cute little head cock and all, she sighed, sending him the picture.
He blinked, before his face seemed to explode with color, taking a gander over the picture he couldn't help but think how much they both looked like parents.
“O-oh.” Was the only thing that came from his mouth, he look another look at Uzi, who was obviously far tenser than usual, she looked at him, and with only a beat of hesitation, threw herself onto his lap, wrapping her arms around him.
“Uh! Uzi-wha-” He stammered, was something wrong? She didn't typically initiate hugs like this unless she was extremely upset.
“Shut up and hold me goober.” Was all she said, holding him gently. He couldn't see the blush or the smile on her face that had appeared after she'd heard his core skip over a cycle when she'd made contact.
“Y-yeah okay…”
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mixelation · 3 days
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so i think the order of events in (a)synchronicity is this. btw this is going to fully lean into shinigami shenanigans incuding...... sexy shenanigans
minato saves tori and she decides she is going to kill him
tori makes minato soup
some other stuff happens including minato tracking her back down and her breaking minato's arm
minato is obsessed with her now
over the course of this tori has been killed a few times to really drive home what happens when she "dies"
jiraiya and kushina both promise minato they will help him get laid
minato is reporting on tori at the beginning but he lapses and fails to communicate adequately to anyone how deadly she is. he's in love, okay, and the only people he respects are egging him on
he kills a bunch of people at her request and tori decides she DOES like him back. this isn't even the "kill one thousand iwa-nin in one go" thing btw
the "kill one thousand iwa-nin in one go" thing happens and it's not even on konoha's orders. minato just does this to get his girlfriend back. he's super happy about it too because now they're together <3
konoha is finally like: wait. wait what the F U C K
hiruzen is like: drop yur girl and take this genin team and minato is like: no i can do both >:(
konoha goes to check out tori but she's just. some. lady????
and so konoha is like. oh my god, the yellow flash has completely lost it. let's wok him to death
and then that DOESN'T WORK
konoha decides the solution is to kill tori. but they want to send minato a lesson because he's actively ignoring direct orders to dump her and they can't let him realize they actually can't stop him from doing whatever he wants.
so the plan is: use jiraiya to distract minato with a mission. kill tori and physically cut the hiraishin marker off her skin. then move her somewhere and mutilate her corpse for the "lesson" part. thy'd prefer to mutilate her FIRST but also they don't know if she has a way to summon minato. so the priority is to kill her and get the marker off
however jiraiya is not stupid and also he's a nice guy who really does want to get minato laid. he realizes something is up after minato says something incongruent with something hiruzen said to him
minato show up just in time to see tori is freshly dead, and then all the konoha-nin still on the scene just. die? he didn't even do anything???
tori flips out bc the shinigami si still possessing her and it gets ~greedier~ every time she dies but she LIKES minato and NOT HIM--!
the shinigami is like: you know what. you're right. even though i'm perpetually starving, this guy is the only one who's ever filled me.
and then the shinigami is like: in want him inside us though, right now
tori: minato. fuck me. right now minato, confused and overjoyed and also sensing something is weird and terrible: you were DEAD??? tori: i'm fine. we want you to. minato: all the grass around you is dead
jiraiya has been completely ignored in this and he's run off to hunt down someone from the konoha team who went off as a messenger. jiraiya takes him captive to come back to tori alive again and doing. whatever the fuck that is
minato instinctively kind of knows what happened and he's freaked out but also. that's his cute girlfriend and someone stabbed a senbon through her neck. :<
they get the full story out of jiraiya's captive
this is some sort of moral turning point. tori decides she does want minato for forever, and to do that she'll have to end the war and maybe konoha itself. minato suddenly finds his faith in his own village tanked. jiraiya is beginning to suspect hooking up with tori is a bad idea
also
tori: please? pleeeease?
minato, in tears: no i'm NOT going to choke you to death in bed to have kinky shinigami sex
tori: i have never been hornier for you though :<
minato: (sobbing)
and maybe
tori: hey if the shinigami kills everything but you while we do it. do you think you're shooting blanks or what
minato: please stop trying to run experiments on my dick
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helloiamadrawer · 1 day
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𝚃𝙰𝙳𝙲 𝙷𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚌𝚊𝚗𝚘𝚗𝚜 🎪
Warnings: none! just general/cute headcanons of the silly circus gang 🤸
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Gangle can make some downright delicious matcha green tea, she has a set of cups and ofc tea bags in her room so when anyone in the circus is upset or stressed from a wacky adventure, she'd offer to make some for them. (Jax would probably be the only one to refuse but hey he's missing out)
All of the girls of the circus had a sleepover once (it was definitely Ragatha's idea :) ), and when it came to the most invigorating activity being a pillowfight, Zooble kind of hesitated.
"Yeah, I think I should opt out of this one you do know I hit hard Ragatha..right?"
"Oh come on Zoobs!" Ragatha cheered," If I can take a butcher knife to the head a thousand times you sure can't hit me harder than--oof!" a pillow ricocheted at her face, sending her bouncing around her room like a ball in a pinball machine (imagine the sound like the pinball makes while hitting the machine with the situation that is happening to Ragatha)
Finally coming back to solid ground, stars revolve around her head as she weaves from side to side as Zooble immediately ran to her followed by Pomni and Gangle to help the rag doll up and keep her steady. "I'm so sorry, I told you I hit too hard!" "Are you okay Ragatha?" Pomni asked cautiously, waving a hand in front of her face. "I'm good..no worries." she chuckled lightly, a wavered smile paved on her face from being clocked by a damn pillow. Rest assured, they never did pillowfights again because Zooble kicks too much ass lmaooo
Caine is a great singer AND NO ONE CAN TELL ME OTHERWISE and here's how everyone knew: he left a door open one day leading to some sort of auditorium different than the one at the Tent, Pomni was the first to see the door, she hesitantly stepped into the other world.
An array of seats were swarmed through the area but no Npc's were in any of the seats but on stage there were a group of them singing a very flowing vocal number, it sounded nice and calming and then walking out in the middle of the stage was Caine, after their measure of singing was cut off by a motion of his hand, silence fell over until the chime of a triangle rang out and he started singing ♥️ his voice was remarkable (song below)
Pomni=flabbergasted and in awe that this a.i could sing so well, she could almost feel herself floating from the graceful power of his singing voice she HAD to tell everyone! she ran to everyone's room, spreading the word and by the time Caine finished performing, all the circus members applauded and cheered.
Ragatha and Gangle were crying a little cause it was so beautiful.
Caine was startled at first no one ever came to his singing performances but momentarily starts bowing in reciprocation of the wonderous appreciation for him.
Pomni has actually asked Caine if she could have a change of outfit, guess what the a.i does? JUST GUESS? Bro changes the color theme of her fit b r u h 😂
Jax and Bubble have kissed once but it was off camera
Zooble was so tired one day that the next morning Jax saw them sleeping in her own 'Zooble Box' full of their spare parts. The purple rabbit thought this would be a funny picture on the wall so he snapped one then getting slapped around by the grumpy assortment of parts after
Ragatha loves to bake. She could bake almost everything you could imagine. Her fav thing to make is pineapple upside down cake or peach cobbler 😋
Kinger collects fireflies in mason jars to have some light in his dark little pillowfort during the day and then the following night he sets them free into the night. he thinks of them as his tiny house guards 🥺🥺🥺
Whenever somebody is in emotional turmoil, instead of Ragatha being the one for emotional advice Pomni has learned to take her place sometimes since she has transformed Gummigoo into a more hopeful being after his traumatic realization of him being an npc 🥲
She's invented her own kind of comforting strat s since she has known now that her friends really care about her. You can say it kind of inspired her to be like Ragatha but in her own unique way 💟
Zooble listens to breakcore/vogue music because it helps them with being comfortable with their mix n' match parts and feeling whole. Sometimes feeling like a fem/them queen helps being in this hellhole of a digital realm 💅
Jax would say rizz and not know what it means, just only says it cause it sounds cool 🙄 bro is literally rizzing up ppl in the show (watch the pilot or ep 2 you'll see what i mean)
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dykevanny · 2 months
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had a really funny idea for an ask blog ft. Vanny and another plex employee oc,,
#Get this right. 2 pizzaplex employees accidentally get tumblr famous bc someone has been leaving weird graffiti everywhere and#Getting up to other shenanigans and sends asks abt it to this one like urban exploration blog. Who later gets an ask basically like#Hey I work at the plex?? This is some insider info only another employee would know????#The two anons are constantly back and forth in this persons inbox and are eventually assigned nicknames#‘Pix’ for the mystery vandalism employee because she shows up as nothing but weird pixels and glitches on cameras#The other employee is ‘Cam’ because they have been monitoring all this on the cameras#One day they get each others blogs and keep sending each other death threats and shit jokingly but one day pix warns cam not to go to a#Weird late staff meeting#The next night it is literally just the two of them and they think this is so funny they start a blog trying to uncover why everyone else#Just isn’t coming in. At first they are like well layoffs duhhhh#But then ppl send asks and messages like ‘hey have u seen this employee it’s my brother/friend/etc’ and they realize shit is actually going#On in here#One night cam is live-blogging their shift and sees a weird intruder in a costume with a knife and runs around eventually escaping and find#Pix lying at the bottom of a stairwell unconscious with a bloody nose later#Takes pix to the hospital. Only to be alone in the plex the next night and suddenly get a phone call saying that pix left the hospital. Bc#Pix left cam as the emergency contact because ‘she didn’t have anyone else’.#Cam has to survive the masked intruder#eventually starts recording everything but when the intruder gets closer the footage gets glitchier#Eventually there’s just one fuzzy image of the intruder with Roxy and Monty standing on either side and that’s the last we hear of cam. Nex#Post is pix saying hehe thanks for following our little story aha !! Bye now it’s over!! And that’s it…..heheheheh#Killer rab blog has become a little boring for me so… might start this soon….#I’d have to make like 2 blogs plus some fake dms too probably . Damn
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MAC OHHH MY FUCKING GOD. ONE OF THE EPISODES OF A SHOW EVER HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE NORMAL AFTER THIS???? HOW???? how long is he going to be FUCKING DEAD FOR!!!! the ashe & mark argument that i felt deep within my soul & miserable on behalf of both parties about them!!! dakotaisms!!! the fucking like. genre conflict of their sillygoofy teen titans shenanigans with a real world where there r men with guns who will simply kill you!! THEYRE WEEKENDING AT BERNIES WILLIAM WISPS PURPLE MORPH SUIT COVERED CORPSE. kicking down your door with a loud bang & then just standing there wild eyed kind of shaking and trembling like a chihuahua
DUUUUDE DUDE DUDE DUDE HEAH. FUCK. s1e19 definitely one of my favorites of all time. i listened to that one during the back half of my shift this afternoon and got to the ashe/mark argument just as i was starting pm checks.... standing in the cramped laundry room in the basement washing my filter socks like
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i think about them so much dude. AND THEYRE BOTH RIGHT. WHICH MAKES IT HURT MORE. LIKE. BOTH THEIR SIDES ARE SO REAL. i cannot wait for u to learn more about them pleaseeeee i need 2 talk winters family analysis with you when you get to . certain parts. season 2 is gonna fucking wreck u i know it.
BUT. THEY BALANCE IT OUT WITH THE SILLIES SO VERY FUCKING WELL. GOD. good fucking show dude. good fucking show !!!!!! williams ghost throwing ice cubes at mark while his fucking. rotting corpse sits in the bathtub!!! what thefuck man
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rithmeres · 5 months
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*starts listening to the thg playlist*
augh -1 health
oof -1 health
ugh! -1 health
mmf -1 health
ugh! -1 health
augh -1 health
etc
GOOD that’s the effect i wanted >:)
#i wish so badly that i could annotate it. when will my husband (8tracks annotations) come back from the war#i made a rule that i was not allowed to take any songs from the soundtracks#until it was all finished and then i can pepper the best ones in sparingly#(abraham’s daughter & gale song & everybody wants to rule the world r going on there for sure)#i wanted to make myself get really creative without the crutch of the soundtracks although they r bangers#like we HAVE to start with the woods by daughter because it’s about sisters.#and if you forget that the hunger games is a story about a girl who loves her sister you have lost the plot#o children by nick cave is about children killing and being cleaned up and shipped off on a train. like ok#eat your young is self explanatory#so is kill our way to heaven (really digs into the mentality of a tribute imo)#glory and gore is on there because i genuinely thought lorde made that song for the movie#die first? well that’s katpee to a T (people who call them everlark u are boring and people who call them peeniss that’s too much for me)#(i think katpee is the funniest ship name ever so i’m using it)#who are you really is like who are you. really. but also i have nothing left to lose / see me bare my teeth for you !!!!!!!!#GOSSIP BY MÅNESKIN. FINNICK SONG. SIP THE GOSSIP DRINK TILL YOU CHOKE.#17 by ladytron :| also a finnick song perhaps :| but works for the other victors also :| they only want you when you’re 17 :|#AND THEN FEED THE MACHINE IS SO MUCH FUN RAAAAAAAAA WTF IS A LABOR UNION HEY (HEY) YOU (YOU) FEED THE MACHINE#if you only listen to one song on the playlist is should be that one because its just such a banger#wires by the neighborhood is like help me kill the president we’re gonna send him straight to hell (and it rules)#and then feel something by jaymes young is about a young person who is emotionally damaged beyond repair 🙃 had to end it on that one
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publicuniversalenemy · 8 months
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just want to assure all my friends and followers that, even though i havent been active in Ages, im still up to the usual: realizing that im more mentally ill than i initially thought, and calling aggressively heterosexual 80s singers faggots <3
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lilgynt · 23 days
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my mom found the thing that started the fight that got me kicked out. so i was right. in my fantasies this happens and it’s great in real life im gonna jump her
#personal#now i gotta call amazon like no sorry my mom looked again and found it#it’s happened to me i get it. you look everywhere and it’s just not there#but oh my god. i was like shit did i send it??? i only remember the other camera? i only remember that one in there#then it’s like well maybe i did take it on accident#and then i was like am i getting so high all the time again that i sent it too???? and don’t remember? that’s pathetic mm#so i called them and god hard to find their number but call and get a note put in the system like hey might have done an oppsie#and that took forever and i did it next day after the fight bc i did feel bad#which was at workkkk 😔#now i gotta call them back nutssssss#also getting my dads ashes separated for my siblings#which either need to do flex time to do that or take day off#which i’ve been doing a lot like hey im sick!#hey! my house got broken into!!#hi again!!! it happened again!!!!#luckily one was a mental health day so ur boys only called out twice yeahhhhhhh#but anyway honestly just happy i let them know the urn situation is 100% on you#said nicer#but i was like hey if u have one just send it to me or the cremation place has some just see if u like any#and i’ll see if it’s easier to pay online or give it to me and i pay them#but urns easily 100 bucks if not more. granted looked at metal before wood but still. ain’t noooooooooooooo way#if it was like. 20 bucks i could see myself being like okay ill fork it over and deliver the goods (dad)#and i’ll rant this everytime but especially when i asked about this when we were funeral planning and before i got them and got told to#basically shut up. no. that trip was super hard didn’t wanna have to do it a couple times#i remember i came home with dad sobbing he was buckled in and i got him out and was just holding him#and i let everyone know hey dads home he’s safe#and i’m distraught holding my dad but distraught and talking to him#and first thing my brother says is when can we get some of the ashes too?#no asking me hey. u alright? no im happy dads home safe nothing just. sooooo#oh i could have killed i could have KILLED.
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nostalgia-tblr · 1 year
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If I could do Fics With A Plot I'd probably attempt An AU Where Lauffey Dies And Odin Goes "Oh Hey, Frost Dudes, I Had Your Heir All Along :D He's Urs Now :D" Except Because This Is A Shit Plan It Does Not Go At All Well. Because it does bother me. Because I worry too much about fictional monarchies having the 'wrong' rules. D:
#this of course means odin has also has to tell his son “btw we lied to you. GUESS WHAT THO!! I GOT U A JOB!!”#and he sends Thor along because a) characters need other characters to talk to and b) he does in fact expect trouble#and I reckon after some sort of tense Confrontation about how if Lauffey wanted rid of his son he should have the guts to make sure he died#instead of leaving it to fate like a COWARD#Loki would - by power of poshness alone - manage to convince one or two Jotuns that he does indeed count as the heir#meanwhile: existential crisis D: D: D:#but hey free kingdom nothing to sneeze at eh? let's go! we can do this!#except (obviously) no. you can't. there is NO WAY there's nobody out there with a counterclaim.#and if your WORST ENEMY raised your new king (who has a questionable claim) you absolutely manage to find a third cousin from somewhere far#off who also has a shaky claim but - here's the thing - he's not an obvious attempt to impose Odin's puppet on your realm#and then Plot would unfold which is why i cant write this despite my Weird Niche Interests being aroused (NOT LIKE THAT) by this idea#also i would answer the “was there no mother involved? did she not mind the infanticide thing?” (could go either way on that really)#essentially Loki does have Scheming Politician energy but sometimes the task really is just impossible#but perhaps surprisingly the ending is a heartwarming reunion and maybe - MAYBE - some sort of vague apology#because that really was The Worst Fucking Plan Of All Time#okay someone stop me making a new file (you-and-whose-army.rtf) and writing the extensive notes i've now got in my head D:#(but an AU so not really!)#do you want a civil war on jotunheim because this is how you get a civil war on jotunheim#...oh no DO you want a civil war on jotunheim?! D: D: was THAT the plan??? D: D:#i'd totally throw in an Ambitious Consort Queen because those are my jam <3 <3 <3#fic-related#thor movies
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fruedian · 11 months
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why are men built like that
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thedeadthree · 2 years
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ENYA HAS A LOVE INTEREST AT LAST AND THEY ARE MAKING ME CRAZY 🤍🤍
#oc: valaenya targaryen#x: valaenya x aurane#they must be appreciated 🤍😌#had to step back for a mini hiatus for a bit for health things again im so sorry ✨😖 TY TY FOR THE TAGS I CANT WAIT TO DO THEM YALL ARE DEARS#AND HE IS A VELARYON BASTARD A VELARYON ONLY THE BEST FOR THE BEST GIRL EVER!#reading into his lore kzjzjxjx i love him i love him ✨🥴#HE REALLY WAS LIKE HEY CAN I HAVE SHIPS ROYAL NAVAL SHIPS AND THEN RAN OFF AND BECAME A PIRATE THAT LITTLE SKSJJXJXJX im screaming#i am manifesting he’s the lord of the waters bc the idea i have in mind of their first meeting is just……. i love it skjzjx#my dragon girl and her pirate boyfriend sksjjxj 🌊🐉🤍#wakes up to his men yelling about a dragon seen in the skies LOSING it over purple scales (starspire) and he’s like ✨😏 oh interesting#starspire does the swanky thing she does where she positions her self in the sky wings extended suspended in the air appearing a star#before landing..! his crew was like this is where we die skxjxjjc it was simply for intimidation#I WONT SPOIL THE REST BUT she was sent by aegon vi the young griff and was also asked to look into the pirate king in the stepstones#by arianne m*artell as she wished to know who’s side he was on?#dany as well sent word to her as she’s a friend of hers as well ✨😌 she was intruiged! so she went! and the rest is history! 🤍#and who better for both of them to let them know who’s side they were on then to send a dragon rider u know?#especially one who just so happens to wield dark sister and is the sword of the morning wielding dawn ✨😵‍💫#SHES SO COOL darn me that she isn’t a canon character and i have to make the content myself ✨😒🥀❣️#im so excited for what is in store for him especially if that’s him? and who’s side he’ll be on? if he chooses a side?#though like in any side he’s on he’s head over heels for enya (AS HE SHOULDD!) so! 🥀❣️😌#D*AEMON AND IOVANNA WOULD BE SO PROUD OF YOU MY LOVE YOURE SO COOL ENYA ✨😌#the singers are already calling her to be v*isenya born again ✨😖#valaenyas allegiances are to dany and aegon and ultimately the restoration of the house ✨😌 besties with jon too!#a*urane @ enya: mark me down as scared AND into it sjxjjxjx ✨😵‍💫🥀👀🥴#leg.txt
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elytrafemme · 1 year
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the vast majority of the reason why i’ve abstained from getting a professional diagnosis is practical-- i already have a therapist (she just doesn’t like to diagnose, it’s not part of her practice but within her qualifications). it would fuck up my insurance in the long-term and complicate other systemic processes. i don’t need medication nor do i need accommodations so having a diagnosis wouldn’t really help me. it opens the floor to traumatic experiences, will likely cost a lot of money, and would again be trapped on my record for years upon years. 
but jesus christ, i wish i had half the confidence that other people can have with self-diagnosis. because even if i have my therapist basically stating that she thinks bpd explains several of my symptoms, and having said that the best way to explain my experiences to other people is by using bpd as a reference, i still cannot wholly convince myself that this is the issue. and i have researched for years and years so it isn’t that, i just. i need someone to look me in the eyes and tell me but if i get that, i get the rest of this too.
#nightmare.personal#it's also hard with BPD because. and i'm not saying this in a way of like ohhh haha it wasn't that bad [was objectively awful]#my childhood by any objective measurement Was Not Terrible#like yeah i have disorganized attachment patterns but that's iffy. it was non-abusive. things weren't great but they were damn good.#stuff just got messy once i turned eleven but by then you're basically old enough for that to not matter as much#but even then like. things are consistently Not Horrible for me i have lived a remarkably lucky life#and like there's the missing puzzle piece of it all but i'm beginning to suspect that whatever i imagine i repressed never truly happened#and if it did it wouldn't matter i'm never going to remember. so the point is like#yes the symptoms track yes it is the best explanation i've found to this#but there are still holes in this diagnosis and i'm never going to feel secure in it#and i'm exhausted and i just want to know that i have some kind of explanation#because even if it causes people to treat me kind of shitty at least they know why i act like this#but if that's not the right explanation and i have to go back to square one#having no kind of reasoning behind why i act so uncharacteristic very suddenly or why i get really hostile apropos of nothing#and then send you texts threatening sh before messaging again like hey do u wanna see this funny video#getting into relationships and treating them icily before jumping in so deep that they become my everything#i can't go back to the time where there was nothing to explain it. where people just didn't know why i acted like this#but i don't know if i've reached an actual explanation or if i'm just desperately searching for anything to fix this#and if anyone could tell me objectively in a way that i believed. that might destroy me but it could also fix this#neg#God i'm exhausted
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opens-up-4-nobody · 2 years
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