#but i'll do that when it's not one in the morning

[mcuamerica]

Hi could I request flustered Azriel? Idc what i just wanna see him and his shadows blushin a little bit :) thank you!!! and feel free to ignore <3

Of course! Flustered Az is one of my favorites! Hope you enjoy!

Pairing: Azriel x Fem!Reader

Summary: One of Madja's apprentices catches Azriel's eye...

Warnings: not proofread, pure fluff, flustered Az, mention of wounds from battle (let me know if I missed anything)

The first time he saw you, you were working on tonics in Madja's workshop. And you stopped him dead in his tracks. He completely forgot what he was going to say. Or even what he was here to retrieve.

He didn't even have the courage to ask for your name when Madja finally snapped him back to reality. She gave him a sidelong glace as she pushed him out of the workshop with the tonics for the Court, and all but slammed the door in his face. She would not let him simper for her ward.

After that day, Azriel made excuse after excuse to visit the workshop, but he never saw you again. He was worried that he made you up, dreamed you. The way parts of your hair fell from your braid into your face. How your hands, which looked so soft in the fae light, worked with the delicate jars around you. And even how your eyes light up at the sound of liquid pouring into glass. The glance at you was all but 10 seconds, and yet, it was enough for Azriel to ride on for the next 3 months.

Then he saw you the night they defeated Koschei. Madja had gone to tend Lucien and Elain, and you were there to help Azriel. His injuries were somewhat normal, aside from the large gash in his calf he hadn't been able to repair. You nervously sat in front of him, hands steady although he could smell your nerves. Or were those his own?

His shadows even danced around you, fluttering at every movement you made. You didn't even say anything as you dabbed a clean cloth into water, settling in front of him on a small stool. "Hi." You whispered, finally looking to meet hie eyes.

He stuttered. Azriel, spymaster and shadowsinger of the Night Court, couldn't get out two words. His eyes only widened at your gentle tone, your eyes glowing in the fae light. "I'm (Y/N)... I just need to clean this wound and then I'll work on repairing it. It might sting. Let me know if you need me to stop."

He wanted you to keep talking, but all he could do was stare. Stare at the beautiful woman in front of him. His shadows circled around his back, hiding behind him as if they too were afraid of saying the wrong thing.

His leg jerked as you poured a cleansing tonic on it, his hand coming up to grip the side of the chair. You flinched at the movement, your body tensing for a moment before relaxing and continuing to clean. Azriel noticed, and decided to keep it in his head for later.

"This shouldn't hurt, but if it does, let me know." You said as you dabbed a warm cloth to the not clotted wound. You then knelt down in front of him to get a better look at the wound. His heart almost burst from his chest seeing you on your knees.

You laid your hands on his leg, just over the wound, and began to let magic flow from them to bind and heal it.

Your hands were so soft. Nothing like his worn, scarred, and callused ones. Nonetheless, he still had to restrain himself from talking one of your hands in his. Just to thank you. Thank you for even taking time to speak or look at him.

Once you were done, you stood up, wiping your hands on a wet towel. "Madja will check in on the wound, but you should be set to resume your normal activities tomorrow morning." You said, gave a small bow of your head, and moved to walk away.

But he grabbed your wrist. A gentle grab that had you worried you missed a wound in your initial assessment, but when you looked him over, you found nothing else wrong with him. Other than the shadows that were swirling around his back, as if nervous.

"I'm Azriel." He said, finally finding his tongue. Gods, that was the most he could come up with?

His eyes widened at the giggle you let out of your lips, letting go of your wrist. You covered your mouth for a moment as another string of giggled fell out. "I know who you are, Shadowsinger." You said, your smile the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.

A blush crept up his cheeks, making his shadows swirl around his face in order to hide it from you. Hide his mortification. Of course you knew who he was.

"Uh.. Is there anything else I can get for you, my lord?" You asked, seemingly realizing that you were in the presence of a deadly warrior and you had just laughed at him.

"N- Yes- No." He stuttered again. Lucien, on the other side of the room, glanced over to the spymaster. Did Azriel ever stutter?

"No?" You asked, tentatively.

"No.. I'm.. fine." He said. "Thank you." He said, thanking his shadows as they hid his face even more. If it wouldn't horrify him even more, he would bury his head in his hands. And that's exactly what he did when you walked away, telling Madja you'd be going home before disappearing out the door.

-

You saw Azriel the next day at the workshop. Madja was still tending to Elain, who was resting at the River House with Lucien. So, you took charge as all of the other apprentices were somehow on holiday.

He walked into the shop, pausing as he saw you at the front desk, scribbling something in a notebook. "(Y/N)?" He tentatively said.

Your head perked up from the book, eyes widening of your own. His voice was so gentle. Gods, he took up half the lobby with his large wings. It was your turn to blush, realizing you'd been staring at him. "Hi, Lord-"

"Azriel.. Just call me Azriel." He said, the heat on his neck slowly creeping to his cheeks.

"Azriel.. Hi. Did you need something?" You asked, standing up. The top of your head barely even reached his shoulder as he walked up to the counter.

"My leg is bothering me today.. Did you have a pain tonic in stock?" He asked.

A deep frown formed on your lips as you peered over the counter to see his leg, which was covered by his loose slacks. "Did it reopen? I'm sure I-"

"It's nothing you did." He interrupted, cursing himself for blaming the pain on his leg. You had mended it perfectly. It didn't even bother him. His hands though... "Did I say leg? I meant my hands." He said, flexing them with a wince. He easily become self-conscious as you peered at them, taking in the scars. He hide them behind his back.

"I can't give away pain tonic without Madja's okay... but she may have a note." You said and turned around. Azriel could hear your heart beating a million miles a minute. Was he being too intimidating? Were you scared of him?

"Last night... you flinched at me when I raised my hand." He said, the words tumbling out of his mouth before he could stop them. He was never like this. He always thought through what he would say. What was it about him that made him stumble over his words? That made the normal leash he had on them go slack?

You paused as you opened a drawer and looked up at him, your hands shaking every so slightly. "I've tended to males who are not kind when they feel pain... It's a habit I am getting over now that I am working for Madja." You said, voice wavering, and found a note about how Azriel could receive pain tonic for his hands. You worked your way to the case in the back, unlocking it and finding the right dose to give him.

As you turned back around, the look he gave you was only one of a gentle male. One who understood what you had been through and wanted to make sure you never went through it again. It wasn't anger.. but hope. That he would be there to stop it one day.

You noticed his shadows still dancing around his back again, as if hiding from you. As you handed the tonic over to Azriel, your hands brushed. He nearly dropped the glass at the shock that went through him.

"Would you like to eat?" He asked.

You peered up at him, eyebrows furrowed at the question. However, the side of your mouth ticked up as you realized what he was asking.

His cheeks heated once more. He was pretty sure his entire face was the shade of Cassian's siphon. "I mean with me. Would you like to eat with me? Not right now. Or ever if you don't want to-"

"I would love to." You cut him off, releasing your grip on the tonic in his hand. "I close the shop at 5." You told him.

He cleared his throat, nodding to himself as he tucked his hands behind his back again. His shadows rushed to you at your answer. And there was that giggle as they floated through your hair. They certainly gave away that their master was happy in your response.

"I will be here at 5." He said.

"I can't wait." You replied, again that beautiful smile coming to your lips.

As he walked out, he was pretty sure he was going to die of mortification. But he wouldn't. Because now he had a meal to plan with the most beautiful female in Prythian.

A/N: Aww hope you liked this! Feel free to submit any other requests (I don't know if I'll have time to respond to them this week, but I will try!)

[strwberri-milk]

Hi, good morning/ afternoon/ evening. I've probably read all of your work on LnD, and I love them all. If it's not too much, can I request like the boys getting a call/update from MC after a disastrous wanderer attack on the city after not being able to contact them?? If possible, established relationship😅 ... thank you for your time!

im glad you like all my writing for them!! im so aefjaweofaw please give me the next main story update - also theres lots of references/imagery of death so if youre not chill w that i will see you tomorrow [salute] - theres also some very very slight references to their myths!! it feels a little ooc to me but thats bc. i think theyd be a little ooc when faced w a tragedy like this!! i hope you like it anyway <3

Zayne holds his breath every time a new patient is admitted. The hospital is busy with all of the patients that are coming in with the disaster, a mixture of those hanging on and people running up to him because he's the closest doctor in the vicinity to confirm death.

He volunteered himself to do triage because he was convinced that he'd be able to stop you from dying, that if you came in through those doors he'd be able to separate his love for you from the mind that studied all those nights but that's impossible - he only got here because of you.

His mind runs circles around himself, almost separated from his body as he tries to figure out why you weren't there. Hopefully it's because you're fine - you don't need medical attention or the medics on site were enough for you. However, he knows there's an equal chance that it's just because a doctor onsite was able to confirm your death and now you were in some bag, stored away with the others waiting for him to come identify you.

When he finally gets a moment to himself he obsessively checks his phone, praying to something that might take enough pity on him to listen at the very least that you'll call him. Minutes turn to hours as he's called back to work. Silence is a commodity now as he's stuck in the theatre, only able to go home after he's exceeded the legal amount of hours he's allowed to work in one night.

The long turned cold water hits his muscles as his mind wanders in the quiet of his home. You still haven't called - nobody's called. He understands that surely, all of you are busy but he's been there when the calls have had to be made. To hear the sobs on the other side of the phone as a squad captain confirms the death of another hunter as they softly ask if they'd like to see the body. He's also seen the calls when the bodies are far too mangled, a sight that no loved one should have to bear. He's waiting for it, almost falling in his haste to grab his phone once it finally rings.

Your number pops up, the letters of your name taunting him as he tries to answer it. He's about ready to throw his phone on the ground from the water on his hand refusing to make picking up the call an easy feat.

"Hello?" Zayne asks, an uncharacteristic shake in his voice.

"Zayne! I'm okay!" you say, voice sounding a little weak but definitely better than he could have ever anticipated.

"Zayne? Honey? Hello?" you ask when you're met with only silence, now beginning to grow anxious yourself. You knew he must have been busy - you were too - and you thought he was safe. He should have been, you'd heard no reports of the hospital being attacked.

"You're alive," he chokes out, falling to his knees.

"Of course I am! Things have just been chaotic so I haven't had enough time to call you until now," you explain, continuing to talk to him.

You hear rustling on the other side of the phone, trying to get his attention again before he cuts you off.

"Where are you right now? Home?"

"Oh - yeah I'm on leave now. Most of us who were in active duty are to let his recuperate. How come?"

"I'll be there soon."

He hangs up immediately, leaving you a little stunned. You decide to clean up a little, having nothing else to do really until he comes over. Zayne never acts this impulsively so you assume that the day with no contact really wore on him.

Once he arrives you open the door for him, planning to apologise for the lack of contact when he almost throws himself at you. You hold him back just as tightly, a little shaken yourself as you close the door after him. You realise that for whatever reason he's soaking, unsure if you should confront that but you decide to ignore it.

He leads you right to your couch, too exhausted to even find your bedroom as he buries himself against your chest. It's not the normal way he lays with you - typically he likes to hold you - but you know not to bother him now. You can't deny you were worried about him too, knowing he probably put in a bunch of overtime at the hospital.

He holds onto you tightly, measuring out the beat of your heart. It's the only way he can remind himself that you're still alive, that the two of you have one more day together.

Xavier has never felt like he wanted to die more than in this moment. One minute you were running with him, trying to stop the Wanderer from attacking the group of civilians the next you're totally gone. Logically, he knows you're most likely fighting a Wanderer by yourself and you can handle it but somewhere he's convinced you'll die without him at your side. You've proved yourself more than capable but he worries about you all the time - he knows how to fight these things, he's been fighting them for far longer than you have - and if you died here he'd have no more reason for living.

He practically goes beserk, tearing into each and every creature with the hopes that one of them can take him to you. With each failure he starts to spiral, standing atop a pile of rubble as he watches the recovery teams start to spread into the city. It practically took an entire squadron to force him to go home, promising him that he'd be the firs t to hear once they found you.

You were diligently following Xavier when you noticed another Wanderer going after a child. You knew that he'd panic once he couldn't find you but you couldn't just abandon them. You tried to tell him you'd be splitting off but over all the screams and screeches he couldn't hear you and you couldn't waste any more time trying to get his attention.

You were able to defeat the Wanderer but not before sustaining an injury that made it too difficult for you to continue active duty, taking the child to a safe spot and staying with them until help arrived. You ended up passing out from the pain shortly thereafter, waking up a day later to Tara in your face heaving a sigh of relief as she called for a doctor to come check on you.

Your body was simply fatigued and after an extra day of monitoring and ensuring you were receiving everything you needed to make sure you wouldn't collapse again when you get home. You nod, knowing what procedure is at this point. You reach out for your phone once the doctor leaves, knowing that Xavier must be worried out of his mind.

You're right, of course. He's laying in bed, staring up at the ceiling as he waits for someone to call him. He saw the scale of disaster this attack was, knows that everything is absolutely awful and he's not the only one waiting for news but every minute that passes is another minute you could be trapped, praying that he's coming there to save you.

He decides to ignore the strict orders he's gotten, suiting up to go help the recovery efforts. He was going bad staying in bed all day, unable to get a wink of sleep as pictures of your suffering flash across his tortured mind. Working on pulling valuables and any remnants of life is depressing on a good day but right now it's downright torturous. He can't help but think that the next thing he pulls out is going to be your hand, severed far from your body.

When his phone rings everything disappears. He quickly picks up, steeling his expression to avoid making things worse should someone look over at him. He doesn't even notice who called him, just hoping that it was someone with news.

"Oh! You picked up fast. Are you just sitting at home then?" you ask casually, so casually he thinks it's almost cruel. How could you act so nonchalant about the fact that you held his life in your hands, that you are the only thing in this world he can bear to wake up for?

"No, I'm helping the recovery efforts despite orders. I...it was too quiet at home," he offers as an explanation and you hum. He can imagine you nodding, tapping your chin as you think to yourself.

"If you missed me you could have just said so," you tease, hoping that the ease in your voice will make him relax.

"Of course I did. Is that even a question? Are you able to take visitors?' You know what, doesn't matter. I'll just wait there until you are. I'll see you soon love."

He hangs up quickly and you know that he'll appear in the hospital within the next two seconds with that uncanny ability of his. You straighten yourself out a little, knowing that you were injured but not wanting to look like a total mess.

You can hear his footsteps running up to your door, slamming it open as he catches his breath. You've never seen him out of breath before - maybe he's much more tired than you initially thought.

"You made it," you laugh, making a slight sound from the impact of him practically jumping at you, holding you tightly as he buries his face into your neck.

"I was worried about you," he says softly, looking up at you. "I thought you'd been hurt, badly. And I wasn't there to protect you."

You sigh, helping him sit down into the chair at your bedside. You offer him your hand which he holds gratefully, never taking his eyes off of you.

"I know. I'm sorry. But look, I'm okay now, aren't I?"

He ignores the pain in his chest, trying not to imagine how heavy your hand would feel in his if you really had drawn your last breath. That weight is far too familiar to him, haunting his every thought in the hours that passed between then and now.

"You are. And I'm going to make sure you stay that way," he promises.

Rafayel didn't even know there was an attack until far after it. He knew you were working and that sometimes, you'd accidentally go MIA. You'd already texted him before your mission anyway and then he got drawn into another project of his and completely lost track of time. It's not until the next day that he finally sees his phone and the message from Thomas telling him not to come into the city for supplies for a day or so.

He immediately starts looking through articles, scouring pages that are constantly updating the death toll in search of your face. He curses himself for not paying attention earlier - every minute he wasted on some stupid was another minute you could have spent at Death's door, all because he allowed himself to forget that nothing matters if it's not you.

It's obsessive the way he looks through all of them, calling your phone non stop all the while. Every time he gets sent to voicemail he feels his breath get knocked out of his lungs, resorting to blowing up your phone with texts. When it's clear you aren't replying he grabs his keys to drive into Linkon despite Thomas' suggestion, knuckles white on the steering wheel as he heads to the hospital.

Even in all the chaos people can't help but stare a little as Rafayel makes his way to the counter, demanding someone tell him where you were. He's really trying not to be a brat, promising you that he'd be nicer to people but when it's your life on the line everything is up for debate. He goes through any and every possibility, figuring out what he can do to guarantee your survival.

Unfortunately for him, he gets escorted out. Jenna tries to calm him down, telling him that he'd be the first to know if they had any updates on you. Right now everything was just far too messy to know anything about anyone and there was a good chance that you were just being treated at a different hospital than usual due to the high causality count. He doesn't take no for an answer and manages to strong arm the name of the other hospitals you could have been sent to, starting up his car again right as his phone lights up with your name.

"What do you think you're doing not answering your phone?!" he yells, making you flinch.

Rafayel's never been mad at you, certainly not to this extent but you know that it's because he's anxious. He immediately catches himself too and you hear it, catching the sound of his hands against his steering wheel as he takes a deep breath.

"I'm sorry. Just - where are you?" he asks, sounding so exhausted that you feel like crying.

"I'm okay Rafayel," you say instead, adding the name of your hospital. He's immediately driving over as you talk to him, keeping your voice even.

"I was split up from the group is all, then triaged at a different hospital. I'm fine though - I managed to just sprain my wrist from overexertion so I'll have a sling for a bit-"

"You're staying with me then. I'm not having you stay alone with a broken wrist. Knowing you you'd do something dumb and make it worse," he scoffs, trying his best to drive safely to see you again. You don't bother to correct him, knowing that's the least of your worries.

You fall quiet, not sure how to respond. Rafayel has always been good at masking how he feels, rarely showing you what he's hiding behind his mask. Now he's an open book, making it clear that nothing will be okay until he sees you again.

"Okay," you agree, leaning further back into the pillows of your hospital bed. "They wanted me to be released into the care of someone if I could anyway. That's why I was calling you - that, and trying to return all your missed calls."

"Thank you," he says so quietly you barely hear him over the sound of his car.

"Of course my love," you say just as softly. "I knew you'd worry as soon as you saw the news."

Another moment passes between the two of you. Rafayel thinks his heart fell out of his chest - or it would have if it was still his to hold. Instead, it's beating firmly in your palm, only able to do so under your affections.

"Rafayel, I'm really fine, I promise. I'm just hungry. Let's get something for dinner, yeah?" you offer, hoping to redirect his energy.

"Yeah," he replies, exhaling deeply.

"Anything you want my beloved. Just name it and it's yours."

[peachesofteal]

Through Me (The Flood) - secret baby fic Simon Riley / female reader - 18+ request(s): sick fics (1/2) and mama's body image

He pulls you under the covers in the marigold shadow of your bedroom as soon as Orion goes down.

You’re not as bold as you have been over the phone, reverting back to his shy, sweet kitten, bashful in his arms as he sucks marks into your neck, hands drifting down your spine and over your hips to fill his palms with plush curve of your ass.

“Missed you, mama.” You smile softly, hiding your face in his chest.

“Missed you too.” He tries to map you with his fingers, stroking them over your thighs, your shoulders, pulling your fingers to his mouth and dotting his lips across each knuckle. Maybe, if he does it enough, he'll never forget what you feel like.

You're wearing another one of your sleep shirts, oversized, stretched, frayed, a thin veil shielding you from him, and when he slips underneath the hem tracing up towards your navel, you stiffen in his arms, muscles tense like a deer in headlights. "What is it?" You don't answer, gaze holding steadfast and forward, directly at his chest. Fear bristles, worming its way into his gut instincts. He sits up. "What's wrong? Are you dizzy?"

"N-no, I'm fine. I feel... fine." Your body tells a different story, curled forward, still tense, like you're trying to protect your ribs.

"What's going on?" You shake your head, wet track of a tear shining in your cheek in the dark. His anxiety, his fear, won't let him tread carefully any longer, steel backed demand slipping free like he's speaking to one of the sergeants. "Talk to me."

"I don't look the same!" You blurt, and then try to roll out of the bed, away from him. "I don't feel the same, either. I'm kind of... squishy, stretched out because your kid is a giant. And I gave birth to him, you know... he wasn't easy." His grip loosens momentarily, and you seize the opportunity, feet landing on the carpet and trying to stand.

His arm snatches you around the waist so fast and yanks, tugs you back to the bed and shifts your weight so you're pinned underneath him. "Simon!"

"Look at me." He rubs his nose against yours, keeping your wrists pinned above your head, his thighs bracketing yours. "You did give birth to our baby, honey. You, and this body, grew him, took care of him, kept him safe. I love this body, mama. I loved your body the first night I met you, and-"

"Exactly." You snap, nose tipped up. "You loved the way I used to look and I definitely don't-" His brows lower, and he cuts you off with his mouth, stealing a long kiss before pulling away.

"Don't interrupt me. I did love your body then, but I love how you look now, even more," to drive his point home, he presses the length of his hard cock against where it's nestled between your legs, and your eyes go wide, "this body had my baby, mama," He dips low, closing his mouth over your t shirt and nipple, teasing with his teeth before releasing, "this body feeds my baby," he releases your hands, trailing his down your ribs and over your belly, where he holds you still, "this body is proof you belong to me, that you're mine, and I'd worship every inch of it, if you'd let me. It's okay if you don't love yourself or how you look right now, because I'll do it for you until that changes." Your eyes are half lidded, smart mouth parted on words stolen.

"I-" Orions cries, echoing from his room, and Simon kisses your shoulder.

"I'll get him."

"What if it's RSV?" He keeps his voice low, hand still covering the back of Orion's head, pacing a small pattern across the kitchen. He's been holding him all morning, too unnerved to be separated from him or put him down for even a second, and now he's sleeping on Simon's chest, tiny fingers and fist curled up in the neck of his shirt.

"I don't think it's RSV. We haven't really gone out much, and he doesn't have a high fever."

"But his snot is green." There's a monster curled up in the farthest reaches of Simon's heart. A cold, black thing that's pulling the strings in his head and making his blood pressure skyrocket. His baby is sick. What if it's serious? What if he doesn't get help in time?

You tuck your fingers inside the corner of his arm, and lay your head on his bicep. "Green snot is also a symptom of a common cold, which babies get a lot." You rub Ry's back and press the back of your hand to his cheek. "His fever isn't very high, and he doesn't have much of a cough. I think we're okay for now."

"Maybe we should take him in, or call the pediatrician again and-"

"Simon, hey." Your hand drifts to his back now, rubbing up and down his spine, like he needs soothing. Well, that's not right. He should be comforting you. You and the baby, he should be taking care of you, making sure you're both- "Dr. Marsh said as long as his fever doesn't spike, he's not sleeping too much, and he doesn't start wheezing, then we're okay to keep him here at home. He's okay, okay? Babies get sick. But we're here with him, and we're going to make sure he's okay. Right?" He closes his eyes, rolling your words around in his mind, your reasoning gaining ground and hooking into him, holding him steady. You're levelheaded right now, steadfast, and he loves you for it, allows himself to lean on it, just a little bit.

"Right."

"Why don't you let me take him? You've been holding him for six hours. Go... take a shower, or something. Or eat. I want you to clear your head, relax a little bit." He lifts Orion into your arms, but shakes his head at your suggestions.

"I don't need-"

"Please. For me?" Refusals die on his lips just like that, and he nods.

The shower does Simon a world of good. His head does feel clear, and he's more focused, more rational, as he dries off and pulls a pair of sweats out of his bag.

Everything is fine. Babies get sick. You're right. His fever isn't even that high.

The lights are dim in your room, where you're on your side, half propped up, Orion on his back in front of you. You smile at Simon as he crosses the distance, leaning over to press a kiss to your head. "Feel better?"

"Yeah, thank you. Sorry I uh, lost it a bit."

"You were worried." You pat the opposite side, next to the baby, and he lays down, big hand on Ry's stomach. "It's the first you've seen him get sick, of course you're going to lose it a little bit." Your choice of words make him wonder, and he cocks his head.

"Has he been sick before?"

"He had a cold around four, five weeks. I was a mess." Your lips split into a shaky smile. "He was miserable, wouldn't eat, wouldn't sleep. Couldn't breathe through his nose. I took him in right away, cried the entire time, but he didn't even have a fever. Just a cold." You shrug. "They told me if he does develop a fever, then it could be bad, and to bring him back in immediately. I spent the next two days watching him every single second, even when he was asleep in his crib, making sure he was still breathing. Checking his temperature every hour." You sigh. "Here, let's do this." You encourage him to roll onto his back, pulling the sheet up over his chest to his shoulders. "You run too hot." You tease, before carefully scooping Orion up and placing him on Simon's chest, still asleep. "This way, you can keep an eye on his breathing and his temperature and I," the words are cut off by a yawn, "can get some sleep right here. Okay?" He stares at you for a long minute, love and obsession and appreciation twisting him up until he's reaching over and cupping your cheek.

"Thank you mama."

[coff33andb00ks]

Rule Breaker - Pt 4

max Verstappen x single mom!reader (with logan sargeant)

{masterlist}{prev} {next}

warnings: cursing, minimally proofread, masturbation (m), lando gives wisdom Summary: Max has it all...right? Besides, he's too busy collecting trophies and completing side quests for anything else. Until... You moved across a whole ass ocean to start over, uprooting you and your son's lives to become social media admin for cars that drive in circles. word count: 5682 auth.note: logan girlies frighten me but i love y'all :) spotify: i made a playlist

The alarm started ringing and Max sighed, reaching over to turn it off. It wasn't as though he was asleep. Sitting up on the side of the bed he rubbed his eyes with the heels of his hands, groaning when Jimmy gave a sleepy mew and jumped off the bed. "Ja, early morning," he sighed, switching on the lamp and getting to his feet. His cat didn't care, already slipping from the bedroom with his tail high. Sassy glared at him from the foot of the bed and he sighed again, grabbing his phone and turning off the lamp.

He grabbed jeans and a white t-shirt to put on before leaving the room, wondering again why he'd agreed to do this. It was stupid. No one cared what a day in his life was like, he was sure of that, no matter how many comments y/n had shown him on Checo's video asking when they'd get one of him. But it was too late to back out now—

His phone screen lit up and he stood in the bathroom, staring at her message.

-Good morning, I'll be there in ten minutes.

Crisp and professional. Just as it was supposed to be. Just as she had been for a week. When he'd messaged her the day before to bring Kevin over for another Disney movie she'd said yes, and had sat as far from him as physically possible while still being in the same room.

-I'll be ready. I'm up. Ok.

Eight minutes later she was at the door, looking maddeningly well-rested and relaxed and he didn't know why but that only annoyed him even more. He took the camera bag from her, noticing she was wearing baggy pants and an oversized sweatshirt instead of the usual jeans and Red Bull team shirt.

"I'll change before we go to the track," she told him.

He hated that the first few moments he was around her now were a little awkward. "What do you want to get first?" he asked, reaching up to smooth his hair and freezing when she moved to stop him. "What?"

"A day in the life, Max. Let your hair be messy. And you said you have coffee first thing right? So we'll do that – I've got the list you made." She took a sip from the to-go cup in her hand and he smelled coffee. "Kevin said to tell you good morning, have a great practice, and he had fun yesterday."

"I did too," he said. It was the truth. They'd watched a movie, and when that was over y/n had still been working on her laptop so he'd given Kevin a tour of his game room, letting him see and hold his trophies and helmets and even giving him a couple laps in his racing sim. She'd joined them, and for a little while it had been comfortable and easygoing, with her teasing him about his fridge of Red Bull within reach and having so many trophies he was running out of room to put them. He'd been about to suggest dinner, the words on the tip of his tongue, when she'd said it was time for them to get going.

She had the camera out, and so he started his day, answering her questions about trying to keep to a routine. The sun was coming up and she joined him on the balcony, asking about daily habits that stuck with him from childhood. He drank his coffee, watching out the corner of his eye as Sassy, his antisocial cat, jumped up into her lap and settled in for a cuddle.

"She's sweet," y/n said, and though there was a gap of at least six feet between them he could hear the cat's purring.

He made a face. "She hates being held."

Y/n looked at him, then down at Sassy. "Is that true?" she asked softly, running one hand over Sassy's fur.

As though intent on making him a liar, Sassy let out a squeaking purr and stretched, headbutting y/n's chin. Max scoffed, finishing his coffee. "She usually hates being held."

"Maybe you just don't know how to hold her properly," she said, turning her attention fully on the cat.

"I hold her just like I hold Jimmy," he said with a roll of his eyes.

"But you're not Jimmy, are you, darling?" she cooed, rubbing Sassy behind the ears and kissing the top of her head.

Max waited, knowing how much Sassy hated that sort of attention. And, traitor that she was, Sassy leaned into the touch, purring almost ecstatically. "You're making me look bad."

Y/n snorted, lavishing Sassy with affection for a few more moments. She set the cat down and stood, and the cat stayed close to her throughout the rest of the morning, calling and winding between her ankles as she got shots and video of Max doing his morning stretching.

"You do this every morning?" she asked, and Max exhaled with a nod while she got on her hands and knees next to him.

"It keeps me focused," he said after leaning on his knees. "Plus this is just a warmup. I'll do training with Rupert before lunch."

"Strength and cardio, right?"

"Will you be doing that with me too?" he asked, resuming his plank.

"Only if I'll get tequila at the end of the day like I did last week."

He chuckled. "I can do a gin and tonic."

"I've never had one of those," she said, trying the plank again.

"You have to lift your hips up a bit more," he pointed out. "And keep your back straight."

She tried again and he pushed himself back, turning to kneel next to her. His hands were on her hips, guiding them up, one hand moving to rest on her back, before he realized what he was doing. Hearing her shaky breath he paused.

"Sorry—"

"No, you're fine, I want to do it. Or at least be able to say I tried."

He nodded, adjusting her form, somehow able to focus on the exercise and not the sudden fantasies that were flashing in his mind. Swallowing hard, he wondered if they'd start invading his daily life and not just his dreams now. "Keep your head down, otherwise you might strain your neck."

"How long do I hold it?"

"It's your first time?" he asked, finally moving his hands from her.

"Doing a plank or having a guy manhandle me?" she huffed.

"Y/n—"

"Sorry, haven't had all my coffee. Yes, it's my first time."

"Then as long as you can."

"How long do you hold them?"

"Two minutes usually."

"Fucking showoff," she muttered, stretching out her arms and relaxing completely.

"I've been doing them for years," he chuckled. "C'mon, time for breakfast."

He was glad she ate with him, glad he'd picked up a few things from the shop the evening before that he'd remembered she liked. It seemed so normal, chatting with her while he cooked, Jimmy by his feet and Sassy by hers. But it made him homesick, nostalgic for something he'd never had.

"I only cook when I'm home," he said. "During preseason I have my meals prepped for me to get me back on track – turn on the kettle?"

She reached over to switch it on. "If you could have anything for breakfast without worrying about training or meal plans, what would it be?"

"This is where I say a cold Red Bull," he joked. When she rolled her eyes and laughed, he grinned. "Waffles. A stack this high." He held his hand several inches above the plate by the cooktop. "With bacon, the kind you can only get in America. And a large glass of milk."

"Butter and maple syrup?" she asked.

"Lots of butter, and the good maple syrup." Looking at the eggs on toast he was plating, he sighed. "I'll have it during our summer break."

"Two weeks off, right? Do you already have plans?"

"Last year I went to South America. I think this year I'll go home, yeah? Spend some time with my mum." Seeing that she was already fixing their tea, he carried the plates to the table and then fed Jimmy and Sassy. "What about you?"

"I'm not sure yet. I'm hoping to get to go home for a few days." She handed him a cup of tea and sat down. "My family usually gets a cottage at the beach for a couple weeks in the summer, and the break starts the second week they're going this year. Kevin misses his Nana, so I've got to get him back for a visit."

"You're close to your mum?" he asked once they'd started eating.

"Pretty close. We had a falling out when I graduated high school. She wanted me to stay near home and go to the local college, but I wanted to go to a school that had a good program. That led to a fight, especially when I was accepted and announced I was going halfway across the country…" She sipped her tea. "Then I graduated and came back home and… It was weird for a little while? But we both apologized and then Kevin came along, and well. She would have forgiven anything, I think, to be able to be in his life."

He nodded, understanding what that was like. Hadn't he done the same with his father? "Can I—" he stopped when her phone buzzed loudly on the table.

Y/n picked it up with a murmured apology, smiling slightly at the screen before answering. "Hey…"

Max's toast turned to cardboard in his mouth when he saw the name on the screen.

"Yeah, I'm at Max's. Day in the life thing. Yeah." She laughed.

He forced the last of his food down his throat and drank his tasteless tea, carrying his dishes to the sink while she talked to Logan.

"No, Ellie's bringing him. Probably around noon?" She paused and he knew she was smiling even though his back was to her. "You're sweet. I'll see you in a little bit? Yep. Okay, I promise. Bye."

"All good?" he asked, forcing himself to sound as casual as possible. Taking her plate when she brought it to the sink, he saw she was still smiling.

"Yeah, it was Logan. He wanted me to bring Kevin to the track. I'll do the dishes since you cooked," she insisted, waving him away.

He stepped aside, opening his mouth to point out the dishwasher but, knowing she would just wash them by hand anyway, he closed it. Leaning against the counter, he folded his arms over his chest. "How was your dinner with him last week?"

She looked at him in surprise. "It was nice."

He nodded. "About—" The timer he'd set on his phone went off and wanted to send his phone through the window. Snatching it up, he silenced it and ran a hand over his face. "I've got to shower, then we can head to the track."

"Sure thing." She tipped her head. "Alright if I change in your room while you shower?"

"Of course." He pushed away from the counter. "No photos of my closet."

She laughed at that, and he felt the awkwardness drift away. "No photos of the closet, promise. But I can get one of the Red Bull pillow on the bed?"

"Absolutely not," he snorted, her laugh following him from the kitchen. He went to the foyer to check his backpack, making sure all his necessities for the day were packed in it. Leaving his phone beside it, he thought about the upcoming practice, mind on the adjustments made in anticipation of the race. He pushed open his bedroom door so he could grab clothes, lurching to a stop at the sight of the nearly nude woman by his bed.

Y/n whirled around, one arm crossing over her bare chest, eyes wide.

"S-sorry," he blurted, quickly looking away even though it was too late for that. "Just need to grab something."

She turned her back to him, and he saw her hand shoot out to snatch her hoodie off the bed, holding it to her. "I thought you were showering."

"I had to get my things ready," he explained, wondering why he felt the need to defend his movements in his own home. "I thought you were washing dishes."

"It was a skillet, two forks, two plates, two mugs, and a spatula. Hardly a big job."

He quickly grabbed clothes, muttering a few more apologies. About to leave, he saw her turning to look over her shoulder and felt his knees weaken. His hip slammed into the corner of the bureau and he winced, cursing, snatching his gaze from her bare skin and leaving the room as quickly as he could, making sure to close the door behind him.

"Fuck me," he groaned, nearly tripping over Sassy, who was of course waiting right outside the door. Stepping around her, he went straight to the bathroom, trying with all his might to focus his mind on practice. The car. The track. Anything but her, because if he let himself think of her he would only think of how badly he'd wanted to—

No. Not allowed. He couldn't kiss her, he damn sure couldn't lay her down in his bed and learn all the secrets of her body. Couldn't find out how her lips tasted, whether she preferred to be held gently or grabbed roughly. Would never learn if she moaned and gasped or whined and squealed. Could never have the taste of her on his tongue or know how wet she could get.

His body craved her like water and he felt nothing but intense desire as he stood under the showerhead, not even trying to deflect his arousal. Giving in, he set the soap down and grasped his cock. He closed his eyes, letting the fantasies run wild. His hand was a sad substitute for what he truly craved. His mind replayed the split second view of her breasts he'd gotten over and over and he was almost ashamed of how quickly he came, gritting his teeth to keep from moaning loudly while his cum splashed on the tile.

Panting, still craving her, he washed himself, trying and failing to push thoughts of her to the back of his mind. Mad at himself for not being in control of his own body, he dried off and dressed, realizing he was taking more concern with his appearance than usual when he smoothed the pomade Charles had given him months ago through his hair. Cursing, he ran a comb through it, scowling at his reflection as he sprayed cologne. "Stupid," he muttered, pulling his shirt on and snatching the bathroom door open.

"No team shirt? I thought you weren't allowed to wear anything else," she teased when he entered the living room.

He looked down at the white tee, unconsciously smoothing it. "I don't live in team clothes," he muttered. He finally looked at her, clenching his jaw to stop his eyes from dipping to her chest.

She'd put on a bra. Pity.

"It looks good. Jeans and a white t-shirt are classic. Very James Dean."

"Who?" Was that some other idiot asshole talking to her? He knew about Logan—

"Actor from the 50's. According to my grandma, all the women wanted him and all the men wanted to be him." She smiled as she zipped up her camera bag. "I watched his movies. If I'd been alive back then I'd have wanted him, too. Ready?"

He nodded, grabbing a jacket. Said goodbye to the cats and watched her get more affection from Sassy in thirty seconds than he had in all the time he'd owned her. Another fantasy formed, and he wondered what it said of him that he was imagining her in his bed. Instead of a sexual slant, the fantasy was her cuddling his cats. Not used to the warmth it filled him with, he let the fantasy play out while they gathered their things, liking the mental image of Kevin and a faceless little girl joining them for morning snuggles.

The elevator ride was interminable, cramped, and he tried to remember what normalcy was while he breathed in perfume and shampoo and pretended she wasn't touching him.

"Are you wearing cologne?"

"A little." The doors open and he breathed clean air with utter relief. Did she like it? Did it bother her? Had he put too much? Should he—

"Smells nice," she murmured as she stepped into the lobby.

Max exhaled harshly, letting his head fall back against the wall, glancing up at the ceiling. "You've got a terrible sense of humor," he muttered to whatever gods might be listening.

"Did you say something?" Y/n asked.

"No," he lied, pushing away from the wall and exiting the elevator. "Just thinking about practice."

She asked him more questions, about the track, if he considered it at least a little his home track since he lived there. Nodded and listened to his answers as they walked to the dock. And it was all almost normal on the boat ride over, her filming clips to post later and getting photos. Then more normal once they stepped onto the trackside dock, surrounded by people now.

Once they reached the paddock she touched his arm to get his attention, not that she really needed to.

"I'll meet you at the garage? I'm gonna run see Kevin for a minute," she said.

"Of course." He reached for her camera bag and backpack. "You can bring him back for a visit—"

"Mama!"

He swung his head around, smiling at the sight of Kevin through the crowd. His expression soured when he saw who was carrying him, but he managed to keep the smile on his face as Logan walked up, greeting him with a nod.

God, he hated this. Hated the way she smiled up at Logan, hated their easy, familiar conversation while he handed Kevin over and told her Ellie had stopped to chat with Oscar. He hated that he hated it and cleared his throat. "See you in a bit, I've got to meet with Christian."

She nodded, and he made sure to speak to Kevin before walking off. Barely two seconds later Lando fell into step next to him.

"Aw, look at 'em. Like a family, yeah?"

Max had nothing but respect and admiration for Lando, but he would have gladly shoved him off the dock if they'd been close enough. "Who?"

"Your social media girl and Logan." Lando grinned, glancing back. "Should've seen her kid like thirty minutes ago. He worships Logan."

"Of course he does, the guy has the mindset of a three-year-old," Max muttered.

Lando exploded with laughter. "The fuck?" He followed Max into the Red Bull motorhome. "Is that jealousy I hear?"

"No."

"Ah c'mon, it's me. Your buddy. Your mate."

"Don't you have things to do?" Max muttered, waving to people milling about as he made his way to his driver's room.

Lando was close on his heels, and the door hadn't fully closed before he started in again. "So you like her?"

He set her bags down and shrugged off his backpack. "Who?"

"Y/n."

"She's my colleague."

"Colleague. You sound like a pretentious dickhead." Lando dropped into a chair and shoved his feet on the corner of the table. "Tell Lando about it, mate. I'm your friend, I won't judge you, just give you advice."

"I don't need your advice," he snorted, kicking Lando's feet down.

"But it's good advice!"

He groaned. "What is it?"

"First you need to tell me the problem." Lando leaned forward, looking far too excited. "You're down bad for her, aren't you?"

Max stared at him, unblinking.

"She gets you all fired up? Got you picturing her doing nasty, freaky things with you? Leaves you bricked and fighting for your life?"

"Jesus," he muttered, looking away.

"Oh, you're desperate," Lando said.

"I am not desperate," he scoffed.

"You're all dressed up. Isn't today when she spends the whole day with you?"

"I'm not dressed up." He wasn't sure what was worse, how he was feeling or hearing Lando describe them in his ridiculous way. "And yes, for the day in the life."

"You did something to your hair, you're wearing your pussy magnet cologne, and you're not wearing Red Bull." Lando ticked off his fingers. "You. Are. Desperate."

"And what if I am?" he asked.

"Mate… Just fuck her and get it over with it."

He laughed. "Life changing advice, mate, I never thought of that."

"See? I'm good—"

"I can't."

Lando's face twisted in confusion. "What do you mean, you can't?" His eyes widened. "Are you – You know you can get medicine for that? No shame in it nowadays. Happens to a lot of guys. Not me, but—"

"What the hell—" Max groaned, throwing a Red Bull at his friend. "I'm not impotent, asshole."

"Oh. Good, because really I'd be worried. You're not that old—" Lando sent the can back. "So why can't you? Because of Logan? They're not official. Just a few dates. He went to see her at her place, but I think they're just friends."

"How do you know all this?" Max asked, checking the time.

"He tells Osc everything and I have a knack for finding out by asking leading questions."

"You mean you're nosy."

Lando waved one hand. "Yes."

"It's not because of him," he finally said after opening a can and taking a swig.

"Then…" Lando threw up his hands and let them fall dramatically. "Why aren't you putting kids in her?"

Max almost choked on his drink. "Mate—"

"She's a fucking milf—"

"Don't say that—" Max held up a hand. "Stop. I can't."

"Again, why?" Lando gasped. "Mate," he whispered. "Did you try and she turned you down?"

"No, she didn't – I – we work together." He rolled his eyes when Lando snorted. "It's in the contracts, mate."

"You're joking."

"Do you want to see a copy?" he finished the drink and crumpled the can.

"No, I mean, you can't be serious? That kind of stuff is only for doing shit in public." Lando shook his head. "It's an easy workaround. Just do it in private."

"What, like I'm ashamed?"

"No, no, c'mon! Stolen looks? Carefully brushing her hand when you're walking together? Sending her a filthy text before an interview? Then as soon as you're back home you bend her over and fuck—"

"Stop."

"It'll be your dirty little secret. You'd have to make sure the kid doesn't notice but as long as you keep it to hotel rooms and when he's asleep that wouldn't be a problem." Lando smiled, expression smug, as though he'd just solved all the world's problems. "As long as you don't say in an interview that you're fucking her, you're good."

"You're insane," Max muttered with a shake of his head. "I can't—"

There was a knock on his door. "Mister Max!"

He was opening it in an instant, grunting when Kevin ran into him. Y/n was behind him, gently chastising him for being so impatient, and Max waved off her concern, catching the boy and lifting him up for a hug. "You having a good day, kleine maat?"

"Yeah! I got my scooter! Can we ride?" Kevin asked hopefully.

"Of course we can." He met y/n's eyes over the boy's head. "Just a little ways down the track?"

She looked ready to say no, but finally nodded. "I've got to get some posts up. Ellie's getting a migraine so she'll probably want to leave soon—"

"Well then we can have fun without her, can't we mate?" he asked Kevin, who giggled. Ruffling his hair, he set him down and looked at her. "Go ahead and do your work, yeah? I'll keep an eye on him."

Her eyes softened and he knew she wanted to insist he didn't have to. That Kevin could go back to the hotel with Ellie. But she smiled. "Thank you."

"Let's go get your scooter, mate," Lando said suddenly.

"Stay with Lando, yeah?" Max told Kevin, looking at his friend. "Don't let go of him."

"He's such a dad," Lando sighed to the boy, taking his hand and leading him from the room. "Does he tell you to eat your vegetables?"

● It's not contagious. Just her migraines are bad right now. I think it's the change in environment. She's not used to the English weather. ● She's going to a doctor tomorrow? ● Yeah but I don't think they'll have a miracle cure. ● Just bring him, y/n. The whole team loves him. We can keep an eye on him when you have to work, and he can stay in the motorhome when it's busy. ● Christian said the same thing. ● Sometimes he's smart. ● You're terrible. Okay, I'll bring him. ● Good. Tell Ellie I hope she gets some relief. Is she getting rest? ● She just went to bed even though it's only 7. She took a pill that doesn't help the pain but helps her sleep. ● She'll be okay, y/n. They'll have something to help her. ● Thanks, Max. See you in Montreal. ● Safe travels, y/n. Give little mate a hug for me? ● Every day. :)

Y/n smiled over the messages and then returned to the messages with Christian. After telling him she would have Kevin with her for the Montreal and getting his assurance that it was okay, she locked her phone, sighing. "Well, buddy, looks like you're coming to Canada."

Kevin looked up from the hot wheels he was lining up on the rug. "Really?"

"Yep. But Mama's gonna be working a lot so we'll be at the track all the time." She hoped this wasn't a mistake. There were countless ways he could get hurt. "You'll have to stay where I tell you."

Kevin nodded. "Okay Mama." He rubbed his nose. "Is Mister Logan coming?"

The duality of child, she thought with another sigh. "Yeah, he'll be here soon. Remember to keep it down, though. Ellie's sleeping." She got to her feet and stepped over his cars so she could get the popcorn ready. "Can you get the movie ready?"

"He said Cars is his favorite," her son reminded her.

"He did."

"Mister Max likes it too. But his favorite is Aladdin."

"I thought his favorite was Tiana?"

"His favorite princess." Kevin followed her into the kitchen, pushing his stool to the counter and climbing up. "But he loves Aladdin."

"Why does he love Aladdin?" she asked, taking down the packets of microwave popcorn.

"He says the genie."

"Well, he has a point." She put a packet in the microwave and moved to get a bowl.

"He likes Tiana because she works for what she wants." Kevin spoke slowly, and y/n knew it was because he wanted to make sure he repeated Max verbatim. He even, probably unintentionally, copied Max's slight lisp.

And so it was that when Logan arrived, she and Kevin were in a debate over the work ethic of Disney princesses.

"I'm not saying she held down two jobs, but Cinderella worked," she insisted while she opened the door. "She cooked and cleaned and dealt with everything in the castle – Hey, c'mon in – and you need to remember it was set like two or three hundred years ago, of course she didn't have a job"

"But she only danced," Kevin said as he greeted Logan with a hug. "Tiana turned into a frog, Mama."

"Are we arguing?" Logan asked with a chuckle.

Y/n rolled her eyes. "I'm trying to defend my girl Cindy and he's showing misogyny."

"Am not," Kevin huffed. Tugging on Logan's shirt, he waited for him to lean down before whispering. "What's miss… That mean?"

"I think it means when a man expects a woman to stay home and cook and clean and raise babies," Logan whispered back.

"That's stupid."

"There's my sweet boy again. Go pick up your cars," she told him, laughing when he ran off to do so. Taking Logan's jacket, she draped it over the hook by the door. "Hey."

"Hey," he murmured, smiling.

His kiss wasn't unexpected. He'd kissed her plenty of times since their dinner in Italy. But there was something added in, something she couldn't quite identify but knew she liked. Leaning into him, she hummed softly when his hand lightly cradled her neck, pulling back at the sound of Kevin throwing his cars into the bin.

"Date in Montreal?" Logan asked.

She opened her mouth to say yes, then bit her lip. "I don't know. I have to bring Kevin with me."

"Oh. I thought he was staying here with Ellie?"

"He was, but she's been having really bad migraines since Monaco. She's going to the doctor tomorrow, but I can't just expect her to deal with him and all that."

"We'll still do something fun."

"We will," she promised, leaning to kiss his cheek. "Go on, I'll get the popcorn."

They parted, and she heard him talking to Kevin while she got the popcorn and drinks. When she brought it out he was already on the couch, remote in hand and following Kevin's directions to find the movie, like he hadn't used their TV half a dozen times by now.

"This is his favorite movie that he watches every other day, so he'll be talking along with it," she warned him with a smile once they were settled and he'd hit play. She could already tell that Kevin would be out before the movie was finished, recognizing the way he rubbed his eyes as he snuggled between her and Logan. Picking up her phone so she could check her email, she half paid attention, frowning when a text from Ellie popped up.

● Is your boy toy here? I want water.

She rolled her eyes.

● He's not my boy toy but yes. I'll bring you some.

"Be right back," she whispered to Logan, pushing herself off the couch and going to the kitchen to fix a cup of water for her friend. Slipping into the bedroom, she closed the door and approached the bed. "Hey," she whispered, setting the cup down.

Ellie groaned, slowly sitting up. "Thanks."

"Pill hasn't kicked in yet?"

"Almost. Logan here?"

Y/n smiled. "Yeah. Watching Cars."

"Romantic." Ellie breathed deeply. "Water?"

Handing it to her, she sat on the edge of the bed. "You're drugged so you'll be honest…"

"Yes, I think you should sleep with him."

She blinked, pressing her hands to her face. "Thanks, El."

"Welcome." Ellie pushed the cup to her. "He's cute and he likes you. And it's been years since you had some good dick. Sleep with him."

She stood and leaned to kiss her friend's head. "Go to sleep, babe."

"Loves you," Ellie mumbled sleepily.

"Love you more." Leaving the cup on the nightstand, she tiptoed from the room.

She didn't want to sleep with Logan, did she? Just because he was cute – which he was, but she preferred the term handsome – and liked her? She did like him. He was good with Kevin, and he was nice. He hadn't been pushy at all since their not-a-date dinner date, but she wasn't blind. She could tell he wanted more than the quick, stolen kisses.

Just as she'd known he would, Kevin was asleep before the movie was halfway through, and she pried him from Logan's shoulder to go tuck him in. When she returned, he'd turned off the movie and put on Netflix, and she reclaimed her spot.

"Is it okay for me to hang around?" he asked, pushing the popcorn bowl onto the coffee table.

"Of course." Smiling, she laughed when he flopped back, one arm draping around her and dragging her close. She barely paid attention to the show he'd turned on, letting herself enjoy the physical closeness. His hand rubbed her arm and she shifted closer, resting her head on his chest.

"Y/n?"

"Hm?" She tipped her head back, surprised – but not really – when he took the opportunity to kiss her. His arm tightened around her, other hand coming up to cup her cheek and she sank into the kiss, whining a little when he pulled back. "Okay?"

"Y-yeah," she breathed, nodding, shifting so she was kneeling, hands gently grabbing the front of his shirt as their lips met again.

"So we can be more than friends?" he asked between kisses.

Y/n exhaled shakily, wondering how he could ask that question when his hand was sliding under her shirt. Or was he expecting her to determine their relationship? "I mean… Yeah? We can just…" It was hard to concentrate with his hand creeping closer to her breast. "Figure it out as we go?"

"I like that," he whispered.

His fingers brushed the outer curve of her breast and her mouth went dry, feeling the flames of yearning in a long time. "I like that, too," she whispered, threading her fingers through his hair. She pulled back just when her lips brushed his again, slightly panicked at the thought of having sex on the sofa. "B-but we don't have to go all the way tonight, do we? I don't—"

I don't want to tarnish the couch my son naps and watches TV on.

"No, no, it's okay. I'm good with just kissing you," he promised.

"We can make out," she suggested, because she needed a little more than kissing. Just the training wheels until she remembered what to do and what she liked.

"Hands above the waist?" he asked while slowly guiding her down.

"Good idea." She had the distinct impression that if his hands went below her waist she'd be begging for more. And she wasn't ready for that. Not yet.

Maybe not ever, and as she started to lose herself in his kiss she wondered if he'd be okay with that, too.

Taglist:

@spookystitchery | @halleest | @lyannesworld | @llando4norris | @kravitzwhore | @younxii | @silentreader128 | @samantha-chicago | @mrsbrxkkxr | @cmleitora | @jasons-little-princess | @toldyouitwasamelodrama | @aundercover | @kiwi43-81 | @awritingtree | @voidsfics | @manicpixiemom | @misartymis | (i think i got everyone)

[jakesangel]

firsts w jake ꣑୧ - deep dive into calm love w him

first future plans talk

lazy moments w you va me his favorite moment w you. lazy morning, hours spent cuddling or lazily kissing, sharing soft words. or lazy night, deep talk or funny stories shared, while you his chest. you know i love this kind of moments baby. i love coming home to yours n have a nice meal then our usual routine finally be in each other arms. don't you think ? he'd say as his graze stays on the ceiling as he starts to daydreams about his future life w you. i'm so excited for when we will live together, in a nice little loft while having our layla w us. i cant wait to come to our home n get to kiss you every night. or to wake up every morning, to kiss your pretty face awake. can you see it too ? , as his gaze finally shift to yours. as he hears your own ideal life, he is happy to be apart of it, warms his heart to know that the love of his life also wants to be w him in the future. so he would love you off to his chest, n lay on his side, facing you. he would then bring his hand the the side of your face, his eyes spreading anything but love to you, i only want you in my future, my love. i only want you now but i just only need you. wether you want kids or not, wether you want to live in korea or not, i'll follow you everywhere n will do anything for you to stay by your side, he would say as his thumb softly strokes your cheek. i promise you ill keep you happy, my love. ill make sure your pretty smile of yours, will remain as long as i'm by your side. thank you for making me the happiest man alive, y/n, kissing your forehead softly. he would then stare softly at you n your face, n finally kiss you, to share how his currently body feels.

first ring

after a year w you, jake would be sure yours the one for him. as much as he wants to marry w you, he can only give you a promise ring tonight. he'd be preparing it for a week, everything will br thought by him, you only needing to look pretty n to accept his advances. you'd come home, w petals all over the floor n your place nicely decorated. music would be softly played as he followed the rhythm while cooking tonight's meal. as he hears your shook words, he'd softly greet you, leading you to dance w him, i've missed you today baby, more than usual, he would say as he makes you twirl. did you have a good day, my love ? he'd then ask, pulling you closer, dancing even slower. alright, lemme make you your night then mmh ? you're bath is already ready, call me when you're done okay ? he'd then kiss you in a comfortable manners. after calling him that youre done w showering, he will be the one takinf care of you. he would mosturized your body, oyt on the pretty dress n heels he boight you spevially for today. he woukdnt forget to kiss you where he can or tell you how pretty you are with im so lucky or my pretty woman. he'd let you have your time to do your makeup while he does your hair, how he knows you like it. finally done, he would then lead you the the kitchen w the prepared meal. the chats will be the same as usual, sharing each other stories from the day n how excited you are for the anniversary trip. once came the desert time, jake would use it to finally tell you on why he is doing all of this tonight. love, could i hold your hand please, he'd say handing his hand, ive had the most amazing year of my life just thanks to your existence by my side. knowing you is my biggest honnor n i wouldn't know what to do if i'd lose you. in fact, you being my woman means so so so munch to me, i truly believe i will love you forever. i have fell completely in love w you. all of your charms all of your quirkiness, everything. i love you as a whole n i want keep this honor to see it all the rest of my life. and as he concluded he'd finally, show you the infamous black box, slidding it on the table, can i be the man who stay by your side the rest of your life, please ?

꣑୧ one week ꣑୧ one month

notes : n the série is finally done >< i hope u had as munch fun as i did ㅎㅎ i truly believe jake is a very polite man would do everything for his girl n would know quite early if he is going to stay w her or not > < again this isn't proofread

@imaluckygirl @luvj4key @stwrjvke @amouriu @neos127 @goldenretrieverjakezgirlbaby @jaeyunpinkyring @pockettwinzz @jwsdoll @heeheeswifey @sjylouvre @txnwvc @oopshee @luvlyhee

[the-fiction-witch]

Little Sister P2

Media - House Of The Dragon Character - Aegon Targaryen Couple - Aegon X Reader Reader - Y/n Targaryen (Daughter of Viserys and Alicent) Rating - Smut Word Count - 2409

Aegon took Y/n to his chambers making the maids bring her things so they could get ready together, the servants ran a hot bath which she took first of course, Aegon watched as Y/n eagerly undressed and climbed into the bath, a smirk on his face as he admired her form. He couldn't help but feel a sense of pride, knowing that he was betrothed to her,

"You know, little sister, if we keep this up we might never make it to dinner." He laughs and began undressing himself, tossing his clothes over a nearby chair.

"why? Will we play too much?"

Aegon chuckles as he steps into the tub with her, the warm water surrounding them both. He sits opposite Y/n, a mischievous glint in his eyes. "Yes. We might play too much. If that happens, I'll be content to keep you in my chambers instead. No way I want to attend some boring dinner with my mother if I can have you all to myself all night."

she giggled as he climbed into the bath with her she splashed in and kicked at him, Aegon laughs and splashed her back, his laughter echoing off the walls of the bed chamber.

"Oh no, the splashing game! We haven't played this one since we were children." He smiles, enjoying the innocent fun they were having. He splashed her back, sending waves of water her way, as they continued laughing and playing like kids.

she giggled hysterically splashing and kicking till she got tried or just bored and jumped on him cuddling up into his chest "will we have bath cuddles when we're married?"

Aegon wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close and holding her tightly against his chest. He nuzzled her neck, planting soft kisses along her skin. "Of course, my little sister. When we're married, we'll have baths together whenever we want, cuddles and all. We'll have everything we've ever dreamed of and more." He smiles, imagining their future together, filled with love and happiness.

"ummm! Can we have big sleepovers?"

Aegon chuckles, enjoying her innocent enthusiasm. "Yes, we can have big sleepovers, little sister. Every night, if you want. We'll curl up together in our bed, wrapped in each other's arms as we dream the night away. And in the morning, we'll wake up to each other's smiles and share all sorts of cuddles and kisses."

"ummm!" She squeezed him "and play times?"

Aegon grins, tightening his hold on her and planting another kiss on her neck. "Oh, plenty of playtime, little sister. We'll have all the playtime we could ever want. We'll explore every inch of each other's bodies, and we'll find new ways to pleasure each other that we could only dream of. We'll make each other feel things we never thought possible and we'll grow even closer than we already are."

"and babies?!?"

Aegon chuckles, a warm smile spreading across his face. "Yes, my love. We'll have babies. Many, many babies. We'll fill our castle with tiny, wriggling, giggling Targaryens and we'll watch them grow and play together, just like we do. Our children will be the most beautiful, most cherished, most fearsome children in all the Seven Kingdoms, and we'll love them more than anything in this world."

"ummm... I want a hundred babies"

Aegon laughs wholeheartedly, clearly amused by her boundless enthusiasm. "A hundred, you say? Well, my little sister, you're certainly ambitious. But let's start with just a few, shall we? We'll make a few beautiful, strong, healthy children, and then we'll see where it goes from there. Maybe we'll even reach a hundred in time, who knows?"

"okay..." She nods "can we have a sleep over after dinner? Pretty please"

Aegon smiles, running his fingers through her hair. "Of course, my love. After dinner, we'll have all the sleepovers you could ever want. we'll have all night together to cuddle, play, and dream. And we'll start planning our future and the family we're going to have. "

She nodded and finished up her bath before she climbed out drying off and wandering around his chambers nude as she waited for the maids to bring her dress and do her hair

Aegon watched her move gracefully around his chambers, admiring her naked form as she waited for the maids to bring her dress and ready her for the evening. He stepped out of the tub, wrapping a towel around his waist. "You look so beautiful, little sister. Just standing there, so free and unabashedly yourself. I could spend hours just watching you move like that."

"ohh? I like walking around like this my dresses can be very uncomfortable so sometimes in my chambers, I just spent all day like this"

Aegon nodded, understanding her point. "I can only imagine how uncomfortable those dresses must be, especially given your...uh...curvature and how most dressmakers seem to think all women are the shape of planks. Perhaps I'll commission some new clothes to be made for you. Something more... accommodating... and yet still regal and befitting of a princess, of course."

she giggled and nodded, jumping on him to sit on his bed cuddling for a while

Aegon chuckled as she cuddled up to him, enjoying the closeness and warmth she provided. He held her tight, running his fingers through her hair. "Do you think our children will inherit your fiery spirit and beauty, my love? Or do you think they'll take after me?"

"I don't care so long as their babies" she giggled nuzzling into his chest but she stopped and giggled even more

Aegon chuckled, enjoying her giggles and nuzzling. He planted a light kiss on the top of her head. "Well, babies they will be, that's for certain. But it's not just about being babies, little sister. They're going to be Targaryen babies, and as such, they'll need to have the right blood, the right spirit, the right look, and the right fire. After all, we're bringing them into a family of greatness, and they'll need to live up to our expectations and our legacy."

she ignored his words and giggled "You sword things it's playtime again" she giggled moving her hips a little as even though the towel it was obvious he was hard again,

Aegon chuckled, feeling her shifting hips as she giggled. He raised an eyebrow in amusement, a smirk on his face. "Playtime again, is it? You're always so eager to play, aren't you, little sister? But we can't keep playing now. We've got to get dressed and presentable for dinner with our mother. We wouldn't want her to suspect what we've been up to in here, would we?"

"but Aegon..." She whined moving the towel away so she could rub against his hips with her own

Aegon smirked, biting his lip as he felt her rubbing against him, the towel doing little to conceal his arousal. He tried to remain somewhat composed, attempting to be the responsible one. "Little sister, we mustn't. We've got to get ready...oh gods, you're making it difficult to think straight."

"please" she begged "just a little playtime aegon. Please my master" she toyed with him making sure he felt as her cunt rubbed on his cock though the thin towel,

Aegon groaned, his resolve weakening at her eager pleas and her touch. The feel of her intimate rubbing against him was almost too much to resist. "Y/n, you temptress... You're a mischievous little one aren't you? How can I say no to those pretty eyes and those pleading words? Fine...a little playtime. Just enough to... take the edge off."

she nodded excitedly almost ripping the towel away and moving herself over him taking him in her hand and wasting no time moving him inside her, she moaned loudly and she happily began to bounce

Aegon groaned loudly as he slipped inside her cunt, the sensation of her bouncing on him taking his breath away. Aegon gripped her hips, helping her set a steady, rhythmic pace.

"Aegon!" She begged her hands on his stomach as she gets faster

Aegon groaned again, the pace quickening and intensifying his sensation. He reached up to caress her face, his gaze fixed on her with a mix of lust and adoration. "Y/n...you feel so good...so right. You're...my perfect little sister...my everything..."

She pulled on his wrist moving his hand down from her face down her neck to cup her breast as she moved,

Aegon groaned again, the feeling of her flesh beneath his fingers only amplifying his desires. "Gods, I love you" he panted out, his breath coming in heavy breaths as she continued to move on him, pleasure coursing through his body like wildfire

she continues happily often giggling and screaming out for him "my master..." She cooed

Aegon's heart raced as he looked at her, her sounds of pleasure and her words sending waves of desire through him. "Yes...your master..." he groaned. "I'm all yours, my little sister." He pulled her closer, his hands roaming across her skin, touching and caressing every inch he could reach.

Suddenly the door opened to the maids coming to get them ready but of course immediately saw the two having sex

Aegon had been so caught up in the moment with Y/n that he hadn't heard the door open. The sound and the sight of the maids entering the room brought him back to reality with a jolt. "What! What are you doing here!? Is there no privacy in this castle? Can't we have a moment without unwelcome interruptions?" Aegon's voice was sharp and annoyed, as he sat up but his body still intertwined with Y/n's his hands still on her and she still bounced.

She maids went back outside without a word and as soon as they did,

Aegon's annoyance quickly turned to pleasure and surprise as he felt her reach her orgasm, her scream echoing in the room. "Oh gods...Y/n...you're incredible" he gasped, overwhelmed by her intensity and passion. He held her tightly, his own body teetering on the edge of release as she tightened around him. As the sensations washed over him, Aegon felt his own release building up. The intensity was almost too much to bear "Oh gods, I can't hold back anymore" he groaned, his body tensing as he reached his own orgasm, sending his seed deep inside her with an intense mix of pleasure and frustration,

she giggled her hips and legs trembling as she felt him lay his seed in her "umm baby number one?" She asked stroking her tummy,

Aegon chuckled breathlessly at her comment, taking a moment to recover from their shared release "I hope so, little sister. Nothing would make me happier than to watch you carry and bear our children. A whole castle full of Targaryen princes and princesses." He lifted her chin, kissing her softly and nuzzling her neck.

She smiled and kissed him too before she jumped out of bed and called the maids back who quickly came in to begin prepping the two for dinner.

Aegon groaned, reluctantly leaving the bed and joining her in getting ready. He still wore a grin, the memories of their intimate moment still fresh in his mind and the anticipation of the future still running through his veins. He glanced at her every now and again, sharing secret smiles with her as the maids fussed over them, dressing them up for the evening's events.

Y/n sat on the bed given she had no vanity as she was in Aegon’s chambers as the maid did her hair braiding it beautifully even as Y/n sat nude clearly something the maid was used to,

The other maid made a fuss of Aegon trying to clean his hair and nails, But Aegon chuckled at the image of Y/n, sitting nude on his bed, completely comfortable in her own skin while the maid fussed over her hair. He took a moment to admire her, his eyes roving over her curves and smooth skin. "Do you always sit like that while maids tend to your hair, little sister?" he teased, a smirk on his face.

"mhm" she nodded "humm?" She asked noticing the dress that had been brought for her the dress was black, not green.

Aegon looked at the clothes the maid had laid out for him and again all black no green "What is this? Why have you laid out only black clothes for us, maid? Where is the green? Where are our house colours?"

"your mother insisted Prince Aegon. Your half-sister princess Rhaenyra is coming to dinner with her family and your father insists on a swap of colours you shall wear black than green" the maid explained

"Very well," he sighed. "If my father has commanded us to wear black tonight, then black it shall be. But make sure you lay out our green clothes for tomorrow. I want everyone to know who we are and that we're not to be messed with."

Y/n dressed too, into a beautiful black gown but her maid did shoot Aegon a glare when dressing Y/n into her undergarments given she has to clean some spilt seed on her leg

Aegon watched as Y/n's maid dressed her into the black gown, a flicker of annoyance crossing his features as he noticed the maid's glare. He knew what she was cleaning up, given their earlier activities. "Is there a problem, maid?" he asked bluntly, raising an eyebrow in challenge.

"no Prince Aegon" the maid nodded

"Good." Aegon turned his gaze to Y/n, admiring her in the black gown. He couldn't help but notice how sweet she looked,

"You look stunning, Y/n," he said, walking over to her and taking her hand. "Black suits you far more than it suits me."

"humm... I don't like it" she pouted "We should wear green"

Aegon sighed, the frown returning to his face. "I know, little sister. I agree with you. We should be wearing green tonight. But our father has commanded us to wear black, and there's nothing we can do against him. Believe me, I've tried."

she hummed and grabbed a green belt from his wardrobe and wrapped it around him, she then grabbed only her green jewelry as a silent way of showing her annoyance

Aegon couldn't help but smile at her small but rebellious rebellion. He appreciated her insistence on maintaining their Targaryen identity, especially against his father’s orders. He wrapped his arm around her waist, pulling her close to his side. "You're as willful as ever, little sister," he whispered in her ear. "But I suppose that's what I love about you. Thank you for honouring our house colours, even if it's our little secret."

she smiled and the two shared a passionate loving kiss before heading down to the dinner. 

[musicforastylesrestaurant]

Harry holding his bubba for the first time. 🥹

Daddy’s Little Girl.

masterlist || ask me anything <3

my blurb masterlist is here.

authors note - when i said i wanted to write something cutesy, this was exactly what i envisioned so thanks to the anon that suggested this. 😊

word count - 1.1k

in which, harry holding his baby for the first time is everything he had wished for and more.

“Would dad like to have a hold?”

The room is filled with a quiet, serene energy, a sense of calm and exhaustion mingling with the first light of dawn seeping through the hospital blinds.

You lie back against the pillows, still catching your breath, the surreal experience of childbirth washing over you in waves.

Harry is by your side, holding your hand with a mixture of awe and concern in his eyes.

The midwife stands nearby, cradling your baby girl.

Harry glances at you, his eyes wide and uncertain. He swallows hard, a nervous chuckle escaping his lips. "I, uh, I don’t know. I've never done this before."

You smile, squeezing his hand reassuringly.

"Neither have I," you say softly, a touch of humor in your voice. "But she's our little girl. You'll be great."

He nods slowly, his hesitation still evident. The midwife suggests he take his shirt off for skin-to-skin contact, explaining how important it is for bonding.

He releases your hand reluctantly and stands up, the nerves showing in his every movement.

Harry pulls his shirt over his head, exposing his tattooed chest, and takes a deep breath. He glances at you one more time, and you see the determination set in his eyes.

He walks over to the sofa in the corner of the room, sitting down carefully, his muscles tense.

The first rays of the sun are starting to paint the room in a soft, golden light. It feels like the beginning of a new day, a new chapter. The anticipation hangs in the air, thick and palpable.

You watch as the midwife brings your daughter closer to him. You can see the fear and excitement battling within him, but there's also a deep, overwhelming love that you recognize all too well. It’s the same feeling you've been enveloped in since the moment you saw her.

The midwife smiles at Harry, recognizing his nervousness.

"It's okay, Mr. Styles. I'll guide you," she reassures him. "Just relax and take a deep breath."

Harry nods, taking a steadying breath as she positions herself beside him, your baby girl nestled in her arms.

"Support her head with one hand," she instructs, "and use your other arm to cradle her body."

Harry follows her guidance, his hands trembling slightly as he reaches out. The midwife gently transfers your daughter into his arms, helping him adjust his hold until she is securely nestled against his chest.

You can see the tension in his shoulders start to ease as he looks down at her tiny, perfect face.

"See?" the midwife says softly. "You're doing great. Just keep her close, and she'll feel your warmth and heartbeat."

Harry looks up at you, his eyes shining with a mix of tears and amazement.

"She's so small," he whispers, as if afraid to speak too loudly and break the spell of the moment.

"She is," you reply, your voice choked with emotion. "But she's perfect."

He leans back against the sofa, holding your daughter close, his eyes never leaving her face.

The early morning light casts a soft glow around them, making the moment feel almost magical.

"Hey, little one," Harry murmurs, his voice tender and filled with wonder.

You feel your heart swell with love as you watch them together, the bond between father and daughter already forming in these first precious moments. Harry's initial hesitation has melted away, replaced by a profound sense of connection and protectiveness.

The midwife steps back, giving you both space to absorb the beauty of this moment.

"I'll give you some time alone," she says quietly, slipping out of the room with a gentle smile.

As the door closes softly behind the midwife, the room settles into a peaceful quiet, the only sound the gentle breathing of your newborn daughter nestled against Harry’s chest.

Harry looks down at your baby girl, his eyes brimming with tears that reflect the deep emotions surging within him. He gently adjusts his hold on her, making sure her tiny head is supported securely. His fingers brush lightly over her soft, downy hair, his touch feather-light and full of wonder.

"Hey there, pickle," he begins, his voice trembling with emotion. "It's Daddy. I've been waiting to meet you for so long."

A tear rolls down his cheek, but he doesn’t bother to wipe it away. Instead, he continues, his gaze never leaving her tiny face. "You know, when I first found out about you, I was scared. I didn’t know if I could be a good dad. But the moment I saw you, all of that fear just disappeared."

He pauses, taking a shaky breath, his eyes glistening. "You’re so beautiful, so perfect. I can't believe you're finally here. Your mum and I, we’ve dreamed about this moment for so long. And now, looking at you, I realise that all those dreams couldn’t come close to how amazing you really are."

Another tear slips down his face, and he chuckles softly, his smile radiant despite the tears. "I promise you, little one, I’ll always be here for you. To protect you, to guide you, to love you with all my heart. You’ve already made my world a better place just by being in it."

He leans down, pressing a gentle kiss to her forehead, his tears mingling with the softness of her skin. "We’re going to have so many adventures together, you and me. And I can’t wait to show you all the wonders of this world. But for now, just rest, my love. We’ve got all the time in the world."

You watch, your own tears flowing freely, as Harry continues to speak softly to your daughter, his voice a soothing melody of promises and dreams. The love and devotion in his words wrap around you both, creating a cocoon of warmth and security.

"And always remember," he whispers, his voice thick with emotion, "no matter what, you’ll always be loved. By me, by your mum, by everyone lucky enough to know you. Welcome to the world, my precious girl. We’ve been waiting for you, and we love you more than you’ll ever know."

Harry looks up at you again, a tear escaping down his cheek.

"Thank you," he says softly, his voice breaking. "For her. For everything."

You had your own tears rolling down your cheeks at this point, the emotions of childbirth and seeing the love of your life hold your brand new bundle of joy was enough to have you sobbing.

“She’s got you wrapped around her finger already.” You smiled at him softly.

“What can i say,” He bit his bottom lip to stop more tears. “She’s daddy’s little girl.”

[yeyinde]

I just read your alpha fics for Price and Ghost and yes I am having a little trouble thinking clearly but I am on my hands and knees asking if maybe there is a chance you would write one for alpha Johnny? I loved the imagery of him holding back from claiming someone in the Ghost fic and I would love to see him finally lose that control completely.

i had an idea for Johnny, but it felt too similar to the baby trap fic i'm writing. the theme i have for him is basically "this man snatches wives clean off the streets" i guess :/

but the idea was:

Alpha!Soap who finds runaway Omega!Reader on the side of the road, desperate to escape town. to run. and as a beacon of his community, law enforcement (a game warden) who has sworn that his duty is to serve and protect, he offers to take you in. to give you shelter until the next morning when you can leave town, running away from the alpha that's been stalking you these last few months, waiting for your heat to claim you.

protecting you is just the right thing to do, after all. and so, he does. brings you into his home, makes you dinner. humming to himself as you beg him to see you off at the train station tomorrow. you have to leave. you have to. staying here is not safe with that alpha still around.

he says, "i'll take care of it."

and he does. but maybe not in the way you'd have expected.

your heat starts in the middle of the night, and you wake up to him smothering you with kisses, drowning you in his musk. he whispers in your ear about how you don't have to worry anymore—he took care of the problem, and he'll take such good care of you, too. always. you don't have to do anything except rest your pretty little head on his pillow and let him rut between your thighs until he's had his fill. delirious, half-mad from the heat, you agree. signing your soul away to a man who'd follow you to the ends of the earth with a smile on his face like this was some off-putting courting ritual and not a desperate escape.

(they find the body in the summer. Price takes one look at the mangled remains, shakes his head, and mutters something about a bear attack. an accident, naturally. that sort of thing just happens around here. and people like Johnny too much to go wondering why you ended up claimed by him the same night the alpha stalking you goes missing. an eerie coincidence. those sorts of things happen, don't you know? and if they have other questions about it. well. Johnny'll set 'em straight.)

[lee-laurent]

Playing Pretend - Jamie Drysdale

Summary: In which Jamie and his girlfriend end things after pretending everything was okay. Or in which Jamie's girlfriend moves in with Trevor while attempting to keep her pregnancy hidden from everyone.

content: pregnancy, mentions of abortion, long distance, keeping secrets from partner (if that's a warning idk), angst, fluff, mentions of sex, implications of cheating/being unfaithful, jamie's trade :(

notes: this one is a bit more angsty than my other fics. i wanted to experiment with trying something new. possible happy ending tho. guess you'll have to read to find out ;) sorry if it seems rushed, i didn't know how to format it :/

"Of course, you have options. You can read more about those here. This is a judgement free zone," the nurse continued to drone on about scheduling another appointment, but Violet had tuned her out. In fact, the only thing that Violet could hear was her heart pounding in her chest.

"Thank you," she mumbled, grabbing the paperwork and shoving it into her purse. All she wanted was Jamie and he was on the other side of the country.

Once she was safely in her car in the parking lot, she let the tears fall. A baby? How was she supposed to take care of a baby when her boyfriend lived five hours away by plane. They barely spoke more than twice a week at this point. Their relationship was falling apart and a baby wasn't going to save it.

"How was the doctor?" Trevor asked as she walked through the door, kicking off her shoes.

"Fine. Just food poisoning, like you thought."

"I told you! Never eat grocery store sushi, Vi. Should've listened to me."

"Ha. I guess you know best, Trev. I'm gonna go lie down. I'm still nauseous."

"Make sure you text Jamie! He was worried about you."

"I'm sure he was," she mumbled, making her way to her bedroom. She looked at the picture on her bedside table. It was of her and Jamie at his first game with the Ducks. She'd been so proud to see him move from the Gulls to the NHL. He had his arm wrapped around her waist and was looking down at her like she'd hung the moon and stars in the sky, while she smiled happily into the camera. Violet sighed, putting the photo face down. She couldn't bare to look at Jamie's face right now, photo or not.

Her phone buzzed.

Jamie <3: Trev texted. Said it's food poisoning like he thought. Feel better. I love you

Vi: Thanks, Jam. Love you too

Lying to Jamie made her stomach churn. In fact, everything was making her stomach churn at the moment. Trevor had made sausages with his breakfast that morning, leading to her projectile vomiting in the kitchen. Which is when Trevor finally convinced her to go to a walk-in clinic. A walk-in clinic that sent her to Planned Parenthood. And now at the thought of Jamie not knowing about his child mixed with the baby in her womb hating the smell of everything, she was leaned over the toilet once more.

"Vi? Do you want some ginger ale?" Trevor asked from the doorway.

"No. I'm okay, Trev. Just, I- I'd like to be alone right now."

"Oh, right. Call me if you need anything," he sighed, gently shutting the door behind him.

Violet sniffled, reaching for her phone on the counter next to her.

Jamie was worried sick about Violet, but he was also focused on the game of NHL 24 he was playing with Cam.

"Wait. Time out. Violet's texting."

"Oh, shit. What'd she say?"

"That... that we need to talk?" Jamie furrowed his eyebrows.

"Shit. We can finish this later. Call her."

"Thanks, Cam. I- I'll be back," Jamie stood up from the couch, albeit a bit wobbly from nerves, speeding off to his room.

"Hey," Violet's voice cracked as it broke through the speaker of his phone.

"Hey, um, what did you wanna talk about?"

"Long distance isn't working, Jamie. I- I think we should end things."

"What? Vi? Where is this coming from? Did- did you meet someone in Anaheim?"

"What? God, no. Jamie- I wouldn't cheat. You know that. I just- this is too much stress for me right now."

"Our relationship is too much stress for you? I- I told you that you could move here. We could get our own place. I-"

"Jamie, I have a life here. I have a job. My friends."

"I had all of that too. But, I- I'm making it work here. You could make it work here, Violet! Please don't do this. You- you're the love of my life."

"Jamie, don't make this harder than it needs to be. I can't do this anymore."

"Please, Violet. Please."

"We- if you need anything call Trevor. Goodbye, Jamie."

Jamie didn't return to his game with Cam; he spent the rest of the night crying himself to sleep on his bed.

"You broke up with Jamie?!" Trevor shouted the next morning, waking up an exhausted Violet.

"Trevor? It's 6 in the morning."

"Yeah? Well Jamie just called me in tears, saying that you dumped him OVER THE PHONE?!"

"We're long distance. How else was I supposed to do it?"

"You weren't supposed to do it at all, Violet! You guys are made for each other! What's with this sudden change of heart?"

"We were barely talking anymore. I need a present boyfriend."

"Vi-"

"Drop it, Trevor! It's frankly none of your business!"

"None of my bus-"

Violet gagged, leaning over and puking on the hardwood floor. She looked up at Trevor, wiping her mouth.

"Get me a paper towel, please."

"Right. Um, right... This conversation isn't over."

He returned with a roll of paper towels. Watching as she pulled herself out of bed, to clean up the mess next to her bed.

"Why'd you break up with him?"

"I just told you. It wasn't working."

"But, you didn't even try to make it work. He said you didn't communicate it wasn't going well until yesterday."

"Wow. Does Jamie tell you every intimate part of our relationship?" she snapped.

"No."

"It was rhetorical, Trevor."

"Oh. He loves you."

"I know."

"Do you not love him?"

"What? Of course I love him. He's the fa- the first man I loved. I'll always love him."

"Then why break up with him?! He- he said you could go live with him in Philly."

"I don't want to leave Anaheim. I want to r- never mind. But, my job is here."

"Get a new one."

"God! You're so immature! It's not that fucking easy, Trevor! I'm not going to start my entire life over for Jamie! So fucking drop it!"

"I-"

"Drop it!"

Trevor dropped it. At least with Violet he did. He spent every day trying to convince Jamie to call her. To fix things. To figure what he could do. Jamie wasn't easily convinced though. After the mental anguish that the phone call with his now ex-girlfriend had caused him, he wasn't sure he wanted to go through it again.

Violet's morning sickness hadn't ended. In fact, it was getting worse. Morning sickness? More like all day and all night sickness. She was in agony. And Trevor as oblivious as he was, was getting suspicious.

"Maybe you should go to the doctor again? I don't think food poisoning is supposed to last this long."

"It's probably just stress."

"Why're you stressed?"

"Work."

"But- okay? I still think you should go back."

"Trevor."

"Yes?"

"I'm fine."

"You're pretending."

"What?"

"You're pretending everything is okay. You're just afraid to admit that things are worse without Jamie. Not better. You're more stressed. Hence the vomiting."

"Trevor, I- I have work to do."

Two hours later Violet was in the kitchen doing dishes when her phone started ringing.

"Trev! Can you get that?"

"Sure."

"Hi! This is Alice from Anaheim OB/GYN, I was just calling to confirm your appointment on Friday with Dr. Rhodes," the voice came through the phone.

"Trev! Who is it?"

"Sure, just let me get the phone to Violet. Oh, perfect! Thank you!"

"Hi?" Violet asked, pressing the phone to her ear.

"Hi! Is this Violet?"

"Yes, this is she."

"Perfect! Just a few questions to go over before confirming your appointment."

"Oh, of course."

"Any abnormal bleeding?"

"No."

"Dizziness?"

"Nope."

"How's the nausea you mentioned last time you were in?"

"About the same."

"Okay, I'll let the nurse know. We can get you some tablets for that. See you Friday at 11:30."

"Perfect, thank you."

Violet sighed, hanging up the phone.

"You're pregnant?" Trevor whispered.

"What? No."

"She said she was calling from the OB/GYN's office. Isn't that a doctor for pregnant people?"

"Not always. They also give birth control and stuff."

"But why would you need birth control if you're not seeing Jamie anymore?"

"For my periods."

"You're lying."

"I'm not lying, Trevor. Why would I lie?"

"You're lying. You always itch your wrist when you lie. You're pregnant. Does Jamie know?"

"Maybe it isn't Jamie's?"

"Yeah? Who else have you slept with? Nobody. You and Jamie had sex the night before we left for Nashville."

"Who told you that?"

"Jamie."

"Ew. I-"

"So it is Jamie's?"

"I'm not pregnant."

"Violet... is this why you dumped him? Are you getting... you know?"

"Not pregnant, Trevor."

"Fine, I'll drop it for now. But, if you were pregnant, I, um, I'd be here to help. I promise."

"Good to know if I am to hypothetically get pregnant," she mumbled, itching her wrist. Trevor let out a heavy sigh.

"You- you can tell me anything, Violet. I'm not going to tell Jamie if you don't want me to."

"You said you were gonna drop it. Plus there's nothing to tell him. Everything is normal."

"Right, um, I'm going out. Call if you need anything for your... food poisoning."

"Will do."

When she finally heard the front door shut, she let out a breath she didn't realize she was holding. The tension in the kitchen had been palpable. She knew deep down that Trevor didn't believe her, but until she was showing she'd be able to hide it... maybe.

A month had passed and Violet was shocked to find that it looked like she was bloated. Violet had always been on the thinner side, but not to the point that she thought she'd be showing this early into her pregnancy. The doctors had confirmed that she was just over a month when she found out, meaning she was nearing three months. Baggy clothes became her new best friends. Unfortunately, most of the baggy clothing she owned were items she'd stolen from Jamie. This led to lots of looks from Trevor as she moved around their apartment.

Trevor now knew, without a shadow of a doubt, that Violet was pregnant. He'd gone into her bathroom to find some extra toilet paper and come across an array of prenatal vitamins. He didn't bring it up though. The apartment constantly had an air of awkwardness shrouding it. Violet and Trevor were tip-toeing around each other. And he knew that eventually he would have to be the bigger person and bring it up, which was uncommon for the Ducks player.

"I was talking to Jamie today," Trevor mentioned as he twirled some spaghetti onto his fork.

"Hm. How's Jamie?"

"Better. He, uh, he still asks about you."

"Good for him."

"I'm sure if you told him... about your situation, he'd be willing to help."

"What situation?" Violet smiled, taking a sip of her water.

"Can we stop pretending, Violet?"

She shook her head, pushing away from the small kitchen table.

"God! Grow up, Violet! You're going to be a mom! Start acting like a fucking adult!" Trevor shouted as she retreated to her room, that Trevor had not-so-lovingly nicknamed "the cave." Her door slammed in response, shaking the pictures hanging in the corridor.

"Hey, girl!" her best friend, Aly, smiled through the FaceTime call. "How're those vitamins? One of the moms I work with says they're the best ones!"

"Good, I think. I've got a little bump now."

"Damn! Baby Drysdale is growingggg!" she dragged out.

"Don't call them that. He- I still haven't told him."

"Girl! You told me you were going to like a week ago! What changed?"

"He- I saw him on Instagram and he looked so happy. I don't want to ruin that."

"So... you're just gonna wallow in self-pity until your baby is born? What about when he sees you with a baby? Isn't he gonna be suspicious?"

"He already accused me of cheating. So..."

"Violet! No! We are not claiming you cheated and got pregnant from another man."

"Jamie's not ready to be a dad."

"Who told you that? Jamie?"

"No."

"Exactly. You don't know that!"

"I'll think about it, Aly. Right now, the doctor said I need to avoid too much stress. It makes my nausea worse."

"Uh huh. Lemme tell you about this date I went on!"

"Do you think Violet would be okay if I came to visit?" Jamie asked Trevor.

"Um... I mean you're coming to see me. It has nothing to do with her."

"I guess, you're right. I'll get a hotel though. I don't want to intrude on her space."

"Her space is also my space, Jamie."

"Yeah, but she's my... ex. It'd feel weird. Is she, um, seeing anyone new?"

"Violet?" Trevor choked on his water, "No. No. She's been busy with... work."

"Makes sense."

"What about you? Any new women in your life?"

"No. I just compare them all to Vi."

"When you come, maybe you can get some closure. Talk to her."

"If she lets me."

"If she lets you," Trevor smiled, continuing to help his best friend plan his trip.

Six months pregnant. Violet couldn't believe it. Her baby was the size of corn, according to Aly. It was hard to hide her ever growing bump, but Trevor's hoodies and some of Jamie's old clothes did the trick. She had no idea that Jamie was coming to visit. It was all part of Trevor's plan to get her to talk to him... and admit her pregnancy.

Trevor was buzzing as he walked Jamie up the stairs to their apartment.

"Violet did some redecorating, but it looks similar to when you left! She's still asleep, I think. She sleeps in on weekends."

"Not surprising," Jamie bit back his smile.

"Welcome back, bud!" Trevor swung open the door, leading his ex-teammate into his home. Jamie looked around, it was similar to when he left. A few pictures had been taken down and replaced with new ones, but it looked pretty much the same.

"Trev? Why are you shouting?" Violet questioned sleepily, rubbing a hand on her stomach. The baby had recently discovered how to kick and it was their new favourite hobby.

"Look who I brought home with me!" Trevor beamed.

"Jamie?" the girl suddenly looked much more awake, dropping her hands to her side.

"You... you're pregnant," was all Jamie could manage, staring directly at her stomach.

"Surprise?"

The group sat in the living room. Well, Trevor and Violet were sitting. Jamie was pacing around the room, running his hands through his hair.

"You're gonna go bald, Jimmy. Stop."

"She- you're pregnant?!"

"Yes. We established that, Jamie," Violet rolled her eyes.

"Yeah. Is it... is it mine?"

"Um..."

"Yes, the baby is yours, Jamie! Are you dumb?" Trevor furrowed his brow.

"You didn't tell me?! Neither of you?!"

"She... It wasn't my place."

"Yeah? What about you, Violet? What's your excuse?!"

"I- I didn't want to ruin your career."

"Ruin my career? No! You were just being selfish. Don't pretend this had anything to do with protecting me!" Jamie exclaimed.

"Jamie, can you sit down? You're stressing me out," she sighed, rubbing over where the baby was kicking repeatedly, sensing its mother's turmoil.

"Violet! We... we're having a baby."

"I'm having a baby."

God, she was just as stubborn as before.

"Z, can we have a minute?"

"Oh, sure," Trevor left and Jamie didn't speak until he heard the door close.

"Violet, this is serious. Why would you keep this from me? Is this why you ended things?" he asked, kneeling in front of her.

"Sort of. I panicked. I just, I don't want you to feel forced to stay because of us," she motioned to her belly.

"I... I still love you. A lot. God, I never stopped loving you."

"Jamie..."

"You... you can come live in Philly! We can fix us. And raise our baby. Be a happy family."

"I want to stay here."

"You... you can't keep my baby from me, Violet. Please," his eyes started to water, "Not any longer than you already have."

"He-"

"He? It's a boy?"

"Shit. Yeah."

"I'm going to have a son?" he smiled, the tears finally falling. Violet could feel her hormones acting up, her eyes also welling with tears.

"Henry."

"Hm?"

"I- I've been planning on naming him Henry."

"Henry. It's perfect, Vi. Can I?" he gestured to the swell of her stomach. She nodded, letting out a sob as his hands met the cotton of her shirt.

"Hi, Henry. It's your dad. I'm sorry I haven't been here. I- I don't blame Mommy. She did what she thought was best."

Violet continued to sob. Why was he being so sweet to her? She'd kept his son from him!

"Violet, can you just think about it? Please. Us and Henry in Philly."

"I can think about it, Jams," she cried, pulling him into a tight hug.

"Are you sure you built that right?" Violet asked for the fourth time, "I don't want him falling on the ground in the middle of the night."

"I followed the instructions, Vi. It's secure. He'll be fine."

"Are you sure? I just-"

Jamie cut her off with a kiss to her lips.

"I'm positive, love. Now stop worrying. Poor Henry is going to pop out early if you keep that up."

"I'd appreciate it if he did. He's been sitting on my bladder all day."

Jamie kneeled down in front of her, placing a hand where he saw the imprint of a foot kick.

"Can you move off Mommy's bladder? It makes her pissy. And Daddy doesn't want to deal with it right now."

"He's not listening. I need to pee," she waddled out of the nursery and into the ensuite. Jamie laughed, following her into their bedroom.

"You look good pregnant," Jamie commented as she emerged from the bathroom.

"Shut up. We're not having sex until this monster is out of me."

"He's not a monster!"

"He's giant! I can't breathe."

"Here," Jamie walked behind her, lifting up her stomach. She let out a long sigh of relief, the pressure being alleviated from her back.

"Thanks, Jams. I love you."

"I love you too," he smiled. Although they weren't the most stable couple on the planet, Jamie was just glad to have his girl back. And now he had his little boy too. He felt complete. And so did Violet. Complete and happy with their soon-to-be family of three.

[bruhnze]

I hope i didn’t crush you

Summary: Ona says Lucy is not tall, Lucy didn't like that. Ona finds out there is more to Lucy's insecurity. (Idk actually, but something like that)

Warning: Mature content, sexual content

Please note that this is pure fiction!

Word count: 3522

Since the poll showed everyone likes these stories, i wrote another, idk how these other girlies do it cause i actually feel filthy after writing this, but ok, i like reading them too, i'll admit it, and with the lack of new ones i took it uppon myself to contribute, this is for all my Luna shippers!

I hope i didn’t crush you - Lucy y Ona

It was late in the afternoon, they had just gotten home from a busy day with morning training, treatment, then lunch with the team, in the afternoon they had done some media stuff, the team had to record videos for different companys and deals. After that they also had an meeting with the staff and Jonatan.

Now they were finally back home for siesta time.

‘’Pfft, that was tireing’’ Ona sighed as she flopped onto the couch.

‘’I know’’ Lucy said ‘But you also had some fun right’’.

‘’Yeah i had fun, you too it seemed, what are Lucia and you up too anyways?’’

Lucy laughed ‘’Corrales? .. Oh nothing, i think she is just like me when i was young, i’m trying to teach her some lessons, but today it was just banter really, she is jokes’’

‘’I love how you always involve everyone and make everyone feel at ease’’ Ona smiled ‘’But i haven’t seen you all day’’

Lucy now stopped with the thing she was doing, cleaning up some lost dog toys and putting them in the dog toy bin, and walked to the couch sitting next to Ona who was laying down with her head on a few pillows.

Ona smiled ‘’Hola bebé’’

‘’Puedo besarte?’’ (Can i kiss you?) Lucy said as she came closer.

‘’Mhm, siempre, especialmente si hablas español’’ (Mhm, always, especially when you talk to me in spanish) Ona sighed.

‘’Te gusta cuando te hablo en español?’’ (Do you like it when I speak Spanish to you?) Lucy leaned in to kiss Ona.

Ona grabbed Lucy by her shirt and tried to get Lucy on top of her. Lucy noticed and positioned herself lying between Ona's legs, holding herself up on her hands, still not breaking their kiss.

Lucy licked Ona’s lower lip en pulled it between her teeth, then she gave a few quick kisses on her mouth and went to Ona’s neck, kissing it softly.

Ona closed her eyes from the sensation and groaned while strangeling Lucy with her legs trying to get them closer to eachother.  ‘’Sometimes i feel like i can’t get close enough to you’’ Ona said ‘’I hate that we have to be in public so much, wish we could just stay in the house for a few days, i want to cuddle with you for hours’’

Lucy, who had now stopped with the neck kisses, held her face a bit away so she could look at Ona. ‘’aw baby, i wish that we could, i love cuddling with you also’’.

Lucy lowered herself and now completely laid on top of Ona, nudging her face in Ona’s neck.

They were laying there cuddled up for a while when Lucy started snoring softly, Ona had put her hands under Lucy’s shirt, scratching Lucy’s muscular back.

Ona took her right hand away from Lucys back and scratched Lucys neck now, at the part where her hair starts, below her bun.

Ona loved sleepy Lucy, with her being the supposed tougher more dominant person in the relationship, it was cute when Ona could cuddle Lucy for a change like the occasional moment when she was allowed to be the big spoon. And just like this moment now, where Lucy is completely relaxed and Ona got to play with her hair.

After some time Lucy seemed to wake up, groaning lightly against Ona’s skin.

‘’Good sleep?’’ Ona asked.

‘’Mhm’’ Lucy got a bit more awake, ‘oh, i hope i didn’t crush you’’ pushing herself up.

‘’no, stay’’ Ona hugging her legs tighter around Lucy ‘’you can’t crush me, i’m very sturdy and you’re basically the same size as me anyways’’.

Now Lucy was fully and wide awake. ‘’Pardon’’

‘huh’ Ona said innocently.

‘’Oh i thought i heard a pretty little lady say something completely ridiculous’’ Lucy said, now getting up.

Ona laughed ‘’6 cm is not very much Lucy’’

‘’Oh yeah, for double that i’ve gotten you moaning like there was no tomorrow though’’ Lucy scoffed.

Ona blushed ‘’Luce, im just joking’’ Ona sat up and squeezed Lucy’s bicep. ‘’But i like the sound of that’’.

‘’Yeah i bet you do, don’t know if you deserve it now, do you?’’ Lucy said in a teasing voice.

Ona now got behind Lucy who was sitting on the edge of the sofa and massaged her shoulders, and wispered in Lucy’s ear ‘’My tall strong muscular and beatifull girlfriend doesn’t want to have her way with me?’’

Lucy whimpered. She took Ona’s hands a pulled them infront of her, so Ona’s arms were now around her and Ona put her legs around Lucy instinctively. Lucy stood up easily and walked them too the bedroom.

At the bed she dropped Ona on from her back onto the bed, resulting in a laugh from Ona.

‘’Do you think this is funny?’’ Lucy scoffed

‘’Ah Luce, you’re too easily offended’’ Ona laughed.

‘’Oh yeah, lets see how long you can continue your jokes’’ -Lucy

Lucy pulled her shirt off and got on the ground to do some push-ups, then she did some sit-ups.

Ona stared at the women, what the actual fuck, she thought by herself, what is she doing.

After a few more exercises there were beads of sweat on Lucy’s back.

Ona was enjoying the sight from her place, now sitting up on the bed.

Lucy walked over to the other side of the room, getting up the spin bike, which had actually become more of a decor lately rather than Lucy used it, like she frequently did last year to get some extra cardio in.

Lucy was pedalling fast now, breathing heavy, sweat on her forehead.

Ona had no clue what Lucy was trying to do but she did know that the view of Lucy’s abs was something she didn’t mind at all, she actually got turned on by it. And with the sweat and grunting it was an erotic sight really.

Ona shifted and now sat with her back against the headboard of the bed. Eyes staying on Lucy.

Lucy was sitting in her shorts and sportsbra on the bike, after 15 minutes she thought it was enough and walked to the bathroom, she walked in and left the door completely open, knowing Ona could see into the bathroom from the place she was sitting on the bed.

Lucy discarded of her clothes and leisurely threw them into the laundry basket. She took her time, now naked, to walk back in to the room to grab a towel from the closet, knowing full well there were still some in the cabinet in the bathroom.

She felt Ona’s eyes following her every move but she didn’t budge.

Walking back to the shower she glanced over at the bed, she didn’t know if she was seeing it right, so she stood still and took a good look.

Ona got red, removing her hand from her pants.

‘’No, go on then’’ Lucy said ‘’I don’t want to disturb you’’

‘’Luce’’ Ona said with a husk voice ‘’I need you-‘’

‘’Nah, it seems you have everything under control baby, you don’t need me’’ Lucy said, now getting closer to the bed.

‘’I want you’’ Ona tried again.

Lucy laughed ‘’Yeah, but naughty girls don’t get what they want, do they’’

‘’no’’ Ona admitted ‘’I wanna be a good girl for you Lucy’’

Lucy smiled on the inside, and was satisfied with the state Ona was in now. ‘’undress’’ she said calmly.

Ona quickly did so and sat back again, looking at Lucy with doe eyes, waiting for the next order.

Lucy looked at Ona’s body, she was really beautifull, the freckles, which she had all kissed one by one, the muscles, the veins. Ona was sculpted by the gods, her face was so pretty that even on a bad day Ona looked flawless in every picture that was taken of her.

Lucy’s eyes scanning her body made Ona weak, the lust and also love that she saw in Lucy’s eyes made her wanting Lucy close, she needed Lucy’s touch.

Lucy gathered her thoughts and focussed back on what she was doing. She was still stood next too the bed, naked.

She walked to the empty side of the bed and laid down, prompting her pillow up a bit and putting her hands behind her head, she spoke again ‘’Lets see what that pretty little mouth of you can do then, besides spouting nonsense’’.

Ona got up, this was not a punishment for her, she loved tasting Lucy. She got inbetween Lucy’s legs and kissed the insides of her tighs before slowely working her way to Lucy’s centre.

Lucy looked down at Ona’s head between her legs, seeing Ona’s butt stick up in the air behind it. ‘Damn’ Lucy mumbled.

Ona heard it but didn’t look up, she was orderd to make use of her mouth, so she was gonna do just that.

Licking and sucking Lucy’s sex she felt the woman getting closer, she now entered Lucy with her tongue, resulting her nose to rub against Lucy’s clit.  

Lucy groaned. A bit more stimulance from Ona caused her to climax. She rested her head back on the pillow while Ona lapped a few more times at her folds.

Ona kissed Lucy’s thighs and sat up, now waiting for a next command.

‘’Think i’m going for a shower’’ Lucy spoke up.

Ona looked at her with disbelieve, she put her hands on Lucy’s legs. ‘’No’’.

‘’No what?’’ Lucy smirked ‘’Seemed like you had things covered earlier, i’ll just let you to it’’.

‘’Lucy’’ Ona sounded desperate now ‘’i-

‘’Okay then’’ Lucy said and got up ‘’I’ll help you out, maybe i can fuck some sense into you’’.

Ona nodded, happy she was gonna get something but unsure about what Lucy meant by that. Looking at Lucy going trough their drawer.

Lucy turned back to her now wearing a strapon, Ona got even more wet from the sight, she laid back and parted her legs.

‘’No’’ said Lucy ‘’turn around, get up’’ while lathering up the plastic cock with lube.

Ona did what Lucy said, and got on her hands and knees, with her back turned to Lucy.

Lucy ran her fingers through ona’s folds. ‘’Yeah that’s what i thought’’ she grunted ‘’You’re so wet for me, you love this shit’’.

Ona whimpered and shuffled a bit more towards Lucy, now feeling the strap against her.

Lucy didn’t waste a second and pushed inside, earning a moan from Ona. She put it in completely, her hips now connected with Ona’s butt.

Lucy first thrusted slowely and then graduadly worked to a good rhythm, she slapped Ona’s perfect looking butt, earning another loud moan. She grabbed Ona rough and held her steady whilst fucking her, filthy sounds filling the room.

Ona felt really good but she needed more, she wanted Lucy to reach around and circle her clit for her, but in this mood Lucy would probably not do that for her. She reached down herself.

Lucy noticed and grabbed her wrist, pulling it behind her back, Ona nearly lost her balance, now resting on only one arm.

‘’what do you think you’re doing’’ Lucy said into Ona’s ear, she kissed down Ona’s back and slowly stopped thrusting, then she pulled out. ‘’Do you want to do it yourself again’’ she flopped onto the bed and sat against the headboard.

Ona looked at her trying to get what she should do next.

Lucy patted her lap. ‘’Come on, show me how good you can make yourself get off then’’

Ona smirked and climed up on Lucy, lowering herself on to the strap. She moaned, throwing her head back and closed her eyes.

‘’Look me in my eyes bub’’ Lucy said.

Ona listened and couldn’t help but hear a desperate tone in Lucy’s voice. Was she as riled up as her right now?, Ona asked herself.

Ona was now riding Lucy, holding herself up with her hands on the headboard, Lucy´s had put her hands on Ona´s hips lightly, not helping her, just resting there.

Lucy was loving this view, a moaning Ona grinding on her lap, she saw Ona getting closer ´´touch yourself baby´´

With her right hand Ona reached down to provide just the last bit that pushed her over the edge.

She hid her face in Lucy´s neck and called out ´´Luce´´

Now Lucy held Ona´s hips more firmly, helping her ride her through her high slowly.

´´ Quiero que me folles ahora Ona´´ (I want you to fuck me now Ona) Lucy wispered shyly.

Ona was brought back to reality immediately by those words. This was not usual at all, the strapon was only worn by Lucy until now.

‘’If you would want to do that too ofcourse’’ Lucy added even more quietly then her last words.

Ona crawelled of Lucy and nodded eagerly, ‘’ofcourse Luce, i just didn’t know that was something you were interested in’’

‘’I just hadn’t thought about it really’’ Lucy said ‘’But a few days ago i had a dream about you, where we did that and ever since then i can’t get it out of my head’’.

Ona was now grinning wide ‘’You dream about me huh?’’

Lucy blushed and playfully pushed Ona ‘’Yes sometimes’’ ‘’But it’s your own fault, you’re just too hot’’.

‘’Bueno’’ Ona said, walking to the drawer ‘’maybe we should use this one first then’’ holding up their smallest piece of the collection.

‘’mhm’’ Lucy nodded ‘’have you done this before?’’

‘’Yeah i have, but it was a long time ago so we’ll just go really slow for the both of us’’  ‘’Have you done this before?’’ Ona asked.

Lucy looked away, getting even more embarrassed ‘’No not like this, but.. penetration in general… yes…’’  

Ona laughed, ‘’I know’’ she waved her fingers demonstratively.

Lucy now laughed aswell ‘yeah but i mean with a toy, but that was really long ago and it happend like 3 times’’.

Ona got closer to Lucy, taking of the harness from Lucy, Lucy lifting her butt from the bed. Ona asked Lucy ‘’Why? Didn’t you like it?’’

Lucy anwsered without looking at Ona, ‘’yeah i kinda did, but i felt a bit vulnerable and the person i was with didn’t help with that, so i never tried anymore really’’.

Ona now cupped Lucy’s chin. ‘’I’m sorry baby’’ and kissed Lucy. ‘’We can just have the same rules that we use for me’’.

Because Ona liked it a bith more rough in the bedroom, the couple had spoken about their boundries extensively. For Lucy it had took some getting used to before she fully owned the dominant role with saying the sometimes even degrading comments that really got Ona going.

But in this stage of their relationship they were having a very good dynamic in the bedroom, she had become more confident and all Ona's needs were met, Lucy’s too, but recently these thoughts had started to arise, and only because she felt so comfortable with Ona, Lucy had dared to bring it up.

‘’Yeah’’ Lucy smiled ‘’That is good’’

Ona was putting on the harness and walked to the bathroom were she threw the attached dildo in the sink and now put the smaller one in the harness.

Lucy was watching her every move, feeling nervous but also turned on.

Ona walked back to the bed and asked Lucy ‘’have you thought about how you-

‘’Come here’’ Lucy said streching her hands to Ona. Ona climed up on the bed and kneeled inbetween Lucy’s legs, she reached over Lucy to the nightstand and got the bottle of lube and put some on the rubber dick.

Lucy watched her and parted her legs slightly more.

Ona turned to face Lucy and carefully studied her face, she saw expectation but also a little bit of hesitancy. She kissed Lucy softly and wispered, ‘’Just talk to me baby, if you want to stop, we stop’’

‘’Mhm’’ Lucy nodded ‘’thank you Ona’’ and kissed her back.

Ona guided the strap with her hand between Lucy’s folds, she rubbed a few times up and down. Still looking a Lucy, Lucy gave a small nod. And then Ona slowly put the head in, watching Lucy’s reaction.

Lucy whimpered and closed her eyes.

Ona slowely put it in completely, she lowered herself more to Lucy and started thrusting slowly, her breast now brushing against Lucy with every thrust.

Ona couldn’t say that she hadn’t thought about this happening, but she didn't want to get carried away on this first time, especially not after what Lucy had just told her, so she steadily kept to a nice pace and focussed on making Lucy feel good.

Lucy was moaning now, she’d opened up her legs a bit more so Ona could get closer to her and tried to reach Ona’s hips to pull her closer.

Ona kissed Lucy’s neck, wispering ‘’Do you want try and ride me now?’’

Lucy groaned ‘’mmh’’

Ona smiled softly ‘okay i am gonna pull out now’’

Lucy whimpered at the loss, and got up on her knees. Ona sat in the middele of the bed with her back against the headboard, Lucy already climbing on top of her. She held Lucy’s hips while Lucy guided herself onto the strap again.

Lucy was now in control of the pace herself, going a bit faster she hid her face in Ona’s neck.

Ona reached one of her hand between their bodies and started stimulating Lucy´s clit giving pressure so Lucy was grinding against her thumb.

Lucy was now panting heavily and her rhythm became even faster, Ona could tell she was getting close ´´You´re doing so good Lucia, come for me buba´´

With this praise Lucy got pushed over the edge, with a few more up and downs and she came hard. She cried out a moan in Ona´s neck, after a few seconds she got off the the strap and sat on one of Ona thighs, placing her head in the nook of Ona´s neck again.

Ona positioned them so they were more laying down now, rather than sitting up like before. She started tracing Lucy´s back with her nails lightly and with one hand she went back to the hairs in Lucy´s neck, like she had done earlier this afternoon.

They layed there for a few minutes when Ona felt Lucy kissing her neck.

´’Did- ‘’Tha-

They spoke at the same time and chuckeled.

‘’You talk baby’’ Ona said.

‘’No, you, what did you want to say’’ -Lucy

‘’I wanted to ask, Did you like it, Did it feel good?’’

She felt Lucy smile against her skin ‘’yeah, it felt really good’’

Ona smiled, ‘’ i’m glad Luce, now what did you want to say?’’

‘’Ah nevermind, it was nothing’’ Lucy kissed Ona’s neck and pushed herself up a bit to face Ona ‘’i love you’’.

Ona’s face became soft ‘’Luce, i hope you feel that you can say anything to me’’. Only now she noticed Lucy’s watery eyes. ‘’heyyy baby, what’s up’’ pulling Lucy’s head to her chest ‘’tell me, you don’t have to look at me while telling’’.

Lucy sniffed her nose, ‘’No, it is positive Ona’’ ‘’initialy i wanted to say thank you, but that is maybe a bit weird, but what i mean by it is thanks for making me feel so safe, i felt as though i could let go completely, honestly i have never experienced a orgasm like this one, it was such a different feeling, very nice’’.

Ona caressed Lucy’s head, ‘’i’m glad baby, maybe we can do it more often like this?’’

Lucy looked at Ona, wanting to read her face, ‘’Did you like it aswell?’’

Ona grinned ‘’yes, very much, it was even hotter than i had imagined’’

‘’Did you imagine this?’’ Lucy questioned

Ona spoke softly, ‘’Yeah i did, i mean i love being on the receiving end, but there is something about using the strap on someone else, it’s hot, but i had just assumed you weren’t up for it, we should’ve talked about it, because i had liked to know that you had these bad experiences before Luce, then we could’ve talked about that’’

‘’Not just this’’ Ona said while pointing between her legs ‘’but also other things, trust is very important in the bedroom’’. ‘’I hate that you didn’t always have that’’

Lucy grabbed Ona’s hand and laced their fingers. ‘’I love you’’ she said once more.

‘’Do you want to tell me about it’’ Ona asked

Lucy smiled softly ‘’I actually discussed it with my therapist also, so you don’t have to worry that i was bottling it up, what do want to know, or should i just tell you the whole story’’

‘’Yeah tell me everything’’ Ona pressed a kiss on Lucy’s head that was laying on her chest ‘’tell me it all love’’.

‘’Okay but the subject contains information about exes and i don’t want you to spite them.. , so maybe i’ll leave out the names?’’ -Lucy

‘’Why, i wont do anything, i don’t even know your exes, only one’’ Ona questioned,

‘’Yeah’’ Lucy sighed, ‘’That’s true, okay i’ll start from the beginning….

[bluestdai]

Imagine the morning after rough sex with Noah

He’s about to go down to the studio to work while you’re practically paralysed in bed

You: 💀💀💀

Noah: you ok babe??

You: *wheezing* y e a h

Noah would offer to stay and take care of you, but you know that if he does stay, it will result in another round of sex

so for your sake, you have to kick out puppy eyed Noah

Noah: you sure you don’t need me to take care you?🥺🥺

You: I will not be fooled by those eyes. Now leave, I cannot afford a wheelchair

this made me giggle cause

he wakes up way to bricked up so wakes up with a soft "can i pull down your panties?" in your ear with his hand on your belly slowly finding its way under your pants and you're like yes you can so he does. one of your legs is still in your panties leg band and the other is on his thighs while he plays with your inner thighs and occasionally rubs your folds and kisses your neck at the same time. when he feels your arousal coming out of your hole he starts spreading it on your pussy and fingers the rest back in. two fingers inside an his thumb on your clit is how he always makes you cum. "i want another one" you tell him, "of my fingers? are you sure?" he asks and you nod yes so he pushes the third one inside your hole and you moan as you feel your stretch around his fingers. "if i knew you'd sound so pretty i'd give it to you sooner" he tells you and starts putting pressure on your clit with his thumb while he fucks your hole slowly with his fingers. you cum after a few minutes of him playing with you and making your arousal drip on the sheets under you. then gets on top of you -while you're still breathing the aftershocks out of your body- kisses you and starts living little strokes with his tongue till he gets to your core again, spreads your legs open, strokes his dick a few times and slides it inside you -he loves how smoothly it goes in after you've just came and have cum all over you- you think he's gonna be gentle with you cause he made you cum gently too but no that's not what about to happen. you're slippery wet and he's so hard he can't even start slowly, the first two or three thrusts are gentle but after that his pace gets so fast that you start to move on the bed and few minutes later your head is touching the bed frame and the pillows are covering your face but he doesn't stop, an kiss every few seconds is all you get from him. you try to keep yourself from moving and hold the bed frame with both hands, you moan his name but that just makes things worse cause the more he hears you moan the faster he's gonna fuck you. "you know you're mine right?" he asks between his thrusts but you're too busy keeping yourself from folding that you can't answer, "im not stopping till you say it" and if he doesn't stop soon you will definitely need help walking for the rest of the day, "yes yes yes" you say "yes what??" he goes harder "yes im yours yes" you answer. his forehead is sweaty and his dangling chain touches your face when he lowers himself to kiss you, this time he kisses your shoulder and stays there. you feel his breaths on your skin, they start getting heavier and his rythm gets messy and messier the more you moan his ear, then you feel a warmness inside you and his dick twitching and pulsing inside you. he takes a deep breath like he's out of oxygen and rests his head on your chest with his dick still in you, "i love you" he says quietly, "i love you too and i cant feel my legs" you tell him, "do you want me to stay and take care of you? maybe a massage will help?" he looks at you like he's waiting for a yes, "no noah stop looking at me with those puppy eyes. go to work, i rather be able to walk today" you say "okay then i'll run you bath before leaving" he kisses you forehead.

[lyrefromthesea]

Male pillars x Reader - Comfort

request: the male pillars reactions towards a s/o that feels insecure about their rank as a hashira

pairing: Tengen x reader, Obanai x reader, Rengoku x reader, Sanemi x reader, Giyuu x reader, Muichiro x reader, Gyomei x reader

content warning: suggestiveness (Obanai, Sanemi)

Tengen:

the pillar meeting, it would start in an hour and you didn't feel ready. everyone in the corps knew the rules, pillars get ranked upon achieving one of two things: behead one of the demon moons or atleast fifty demons.

so why didn't you feel ready? you've fought, since you've joined the demon slayers about two years ago, you've slayed a total of 76 demons. what now? this didn't feel right.

you couldn't stand next to the bravest swordsman between all of you. they were different, they've looked into the eyes of death. you knew, your husband was one of them after all.

perhaps you should quit, tell master Kagaya that you weren't ready, weren't deserving of such a high rank. the insecurities took over your mind, not even noticing how your husband entered the room.

"what's up with that face? ya gotta be more flamboyant, baby!" he encouraged, walking up to you. he sat down next to you, the bed sinking under his weight. "..baby?"

"this doesn't feel right.." you eventually said, his eyes widening slightly. he already knew about your insecurities, you had told him about them, but he didn't want to acknowledge it.

"i know. it doesn't. maybe it never will, but that's something you have to accept." he answered, suddenly appearing more serious than usual. he didn't mantain his "flashy" demeanor during serious topics - he never did.

"did it ever feel right to go outside and possibly sign your death sentence?" he joked, wrapping an arm around you and pulling you closer to his side. head leaning against his shoulder, he looked down at you.

"i know that you deserve this place. you don't need to worry over it as long as I'm by your side.." he said, his voice having turned more gentle. you gave him a small smile, nodding lightly.

"let's go, i'll help you through it." he told you, standing up and holding a hand out. you took it. he was right, it didn't feel as bad when he was with you.

Obanai:

"stop saying that." he scolded you, not accepting the way you were belittling yourself. you had looked stressed since this morning, now slowly starting to make him worry.

when he asked what's wrong, he was shocked to hear you talk upsetting about yourself. you sounded completely discouraged.

"your opinion doesn't make sense. i know you're the right person for this." he said, watching you sit down on the bed.

"Obanai, listen.." you tried voicing your insecurities, only to feel your breath hitch. he had taken his mask off, standing right in front of you. feeling him press a kiss against your lips, your eyes widened.

"i will show you how serious i am about this." he claimed, hands coming to your waist. truthfully, he typically wasn't the one taking control in these situations, your heartbeat picking up with how serious he sounded.

Rengoku:

small tears gathered at the corner of your eyes, trying to stop them didn't help at all. you felt selfish, thinking of the sacrifices of the other hashira. would you be able to do as they did when it came down to it?

you've seen the scars on Sanemi's body long before you stepped into your place as a pillar. you've watched Muichiro train himself sick - what did you do? your thoughts got interrupted by a warm hand on your shoulder.

"Kyojuro! I.. I didn't see you there." you looked at him, head immediately turning away again. you didn't want him to see your tears, it would only hurt more.

"little flame! didn't you hear me? why are you crying?" he asked, confused upon finding you sulk in your bedroom. he gently turned you to face him, wiping the tears away. they wouldn't fall under his watch.

"what's wrong?" he tilted his head to the side, wanting to understand you. truthfully, he didn't understand what was going on, but he wanted to.

"i don't think I can do this.. all of you did amazing, fighting for the people you love. i'm not like that.." you admitted, brushing his hand off your shoulder, stepping away. he let you. he knew how important personal space could be.

"that's nothing i haven't seen you do already, little flame." he answered, trying to encourage you. he was glad you weren't crying anymore, but he couldn't stand seeing you so insecure either.

"but i can see it! or did you see me rupturing my eardrums to save others?" you spat back. you would regret your attitude later - he didn't deserve being treated this way, but right now you couldn't concentrate on that.

"little flame, don't compare yourself to me!" he answered, promptly pulling you into a hug. you were surprised by his actions, he normally only was this straightforward with words.

"besides, thinking of it now, damaging my own hearing wasn't the smartest idea!" he confirmed, yet his tone was enthusiastic, you felt yourself smile at his words. sometimes his tone didn't match his words.

he didn't know what exactly cheered you up, but he was happy he made you laugh.

Sanemi:

"you do know how weird your worries are after looking at me, right?" he had a challenging glint in his eyes. it was already clear for him, it didn't matter what you said, he would prove you wrong.

"you don't count, you're a marechi." you answered, looking away. his scars were different, they gave him an advantage. you received them for acting dumb and endangering yourself.

"do you think i'm doing this myself? never. every scar symbolizes were a demon has hit me before." he told you, your eyes widening.

"are you seriously worried about some scars." he asked you, grabbing your wrist and pulling you closer. he nearly sounded offended at the mere thought. "i like them. i don't see a problem with a few lousy scars."

"did this one make you feel that way?" he asked, nodding towards the scar on your arm. he kissed the scarred skin softly, his eyes staying on yours. "or this one?"

you felt your cheeks flushing, the man slowly finding every scar that was seen, determined to show his own kind of affection. he kissed over the scar on your collarbone, fingers unbuttoning your uniform.

"i'll show you how much i appreciate every single one of them."

Giyuu:

"i don't deserve this. i shouldn't have the right to stand next to you or the others.." you said, clearly in distress. he didn't say anything, staring at you.

your words felt too familiar, too reasonable. he understood your dilemma, he knew that it felt like an endless hole. that's why he remained silent and only listened.

you don't remember when you started talking - insecurities revealing themselves. he hadn't moved since then, his eyes focused on you.

after what seemed like forever, he moved for the first time, standing right in front of you. he would've liked to approach this from a logical perspective, tell you why you were perfect as a pillar.

yet he knew that logic wouldn't come through, that he needed to comfort you differently.

you went quiet, looking at the raven-haired man. before you knew it, you were caught in his embrace.

no words were exchanged and no more actions were initiated. you just stood there, accepting his warmth.

it was enough.

Muichiro:

"i told you to stop doubting yourself." his voice always sounded monotone when he wasn't happy about your behavior. you could feel it even now. he didn't agree with your earlier statement.

"that's easy for you to say, you're a prodigy." you countered, but your argument didn't reach him. he was set on his words. "you're only saying that because i'm your tsuguko."

"that has nothing to do with your title as my tsuguko." was the answer you received from him. he sounded serious, your eyes slowly searching for his.

"you're an exceptional fighter. if it wasn't for you, i would've already died in past missions." he claimed, your words dying down. you had much to say, but the certitude he showed made it hard to argue.

"will i be able to rely on your talent again?" he asked, grabbing your hand. he was serious, he believed in you. insecurities were nagging at the back of your mind, but you wanted answer - to agree.

"..yes." you answered quietly, feeling him gently pull you along. as long as he was there, you couldn't think of your insecurities, you had something to protect.

Gyomei:

the master's estate was quiet, at least his backyard made you think so. the pillars should meet in about 20 minutes, why was no one here? you knew they respected the master - everyone did.

you should've been promoted to a hashira in front of them, it wasn't easy to kill one of the lower moons after all. did they forget? ..or maybe they're not coming on purpose.

you barely survived your interaction with the lower moon, they must've done much more expressive things than you. what if they didn't accept your title?

"[name], are you listening?" Himejima asked, he had noticed you after hearing your quiet mumbles. when you didn't react, he crouched down right next to your sitting for form.

"no.. i don't think i can do this.." you admitted, looking away. he had seldom heard your voice so quiet, your confidence had seemingly vanished. he quietly placed a large hand on your back. "i'm not as good as you, i don't fit into this place."

"i don't think you understand. even the pillars have differences in their strengths." he told you, finally sitting down properly. you glanced up at him, he was much taller than you.

"we learn from our fight. even now we learn with every demon we slay." he encouraged, trying to make you see that there's no need for insecurities.

"let's not worry about this now. tell me how your last mission was." he asked, wanting to make you think of different things. you smiled softly, trying to remember the demon you've fought.

[auteurdelabre]

So Much to Lose Part 13 : Family Dinner

words: 7.5k

story rating: 18+

tags: emotional, sexual tension, idiots in love

a/n: two days ahead of schedule! I had to add another chapter in before 'coffee flavored kisses' chapter so it makes dramaturgically (please get that reference). I hope you enjoy, its one of my favorite scenes I've written for this story.

masterlist

Chapter 13: Family Dinner

"Are you even listening to me?"

You glance over your shoulder to where Jennifer leans against your counter. She's wearing a purple sweater dress today, her own creation. She's holding a coffee and giving you a small smirk.  

"Sorry, what?"

"You're distracted today," Jennifer muses.

The two of you are in your kitchen this morning, the early morning sun shining through your windows. It melted a lot of the snow, allowing bits of green to poke through. 

Jennifer saw you returning from the market with all the baking supplies you'd need. She'd commented that she wished she could bake as well as you and so of course you'd offered to teach her. 

She is so willing to spend her time teaching you to shoot, to take care of you, of course you wanted to pay her back in some small way. But ever since she crossed the threshold this morning with two coffees in hand chattering away about the town meeting you've felt this deep pit in your stomach.

Why did he do that? Why did you let him? Why did you want him to do more? You certainly hadn’t shied from his touch; you’d begged him to make you come right there. Your cheeks flame at the memory, thinking back to that evening.

You’d given Jennifer some bullshit excuse about a headache after she found you moments after you staggered out of the closet. Then you’d jogged home, your heart racing as quickly as your mind.

"Just haven't made a cake in a long time," you lie, turning away from her as you mix the batter. "Guess I'm just super focused on it."

The truth is you're completely distracted today. You have been ever since the town meeting with Joel's hand down your pants and his voice in your ear commanding you to come. You're ashamed to admit that since that night you've been bringing yourself off to the memory. 

Are you actually attracted to asshole? Or is it just that he makes the world feel safe? That he can make your brain turn off and make it all go quiet? 

There's also a humiliation there. "You think I didn't hear you on patrols?" 

You force the thought from your mind. You don't need to think about that right now. You turn your attention back to your friend who is mixing her own chocolate batter. 

"I was asking why you're making a cake of all things?" Jennifer says, frowning at the lumpy contents of her bowl. "You making it for Luke?"

She says it in a singsong voice, grinning toothily at you. 

"No," you say with a smirk. "Just making it for practice." 

Luke is another fly in the ointment as it were. While Joel's personality is abrasive at best, Luke is tender and sweet and patient. When he talks to you he really seems like he cares to know your opinion. Unlike a certain Mister Miller.

"Maybe I'll give this one to Joel," Jennifer muses, as if reading your thoughts. "They say the way to a man's heart is through his stomach after all."

You give her a weak smile. 

While you're ashamed that Joel's treatment of you is turning you on more than you want to admit, you're more ashamed that the woman in front of you is supposed to be your friend, your best friend, and you're keeping this all from her. 

It wouldn't matter as much if she didn't like Joel. You could excuse your lack of sharing on being a private person. But you know that Jennifer likes Joel and keeping this from her is dishonest. But you're also a coward because you can't find the words to tell her.

"How was shooting practice with Luke?"

"Good," you tell her honestly, feeling a blush overtake your cheeks. "I shot four cans from a pretty fair distance."

"That's amazing!" Jennifer wraps you in a hug from behind. "See I knew you just needed a little practice!"

You grin shyly, feeling pleased and pretty damn proud of yourself.

"So did you like being with Luke alone?" Jennifer says casually as you set the temperature on the stove. There's something about the way she says it that gives you pause. 

When you look up she's grinning into her bowl, a sneaky little grin just for herself. The answer is there before you even ask the question. 

"You planned that?" 

You stare at her open-mouthed. Jennifer shrugs at you, as if she is not the most devious person in the room. 

"I mean I did need to help with textiles but I didn't need to miss practice." She winks at you. "And I may just get called away at the last minute next week too." 

"Jennifer!"

The two of you dissolve into laughter, the rest of the morning bathed in shades of pink. Jennifer has that uncanny ability to bring color into every room.  

A short while later you remove the dual cakes from the oven, praising Jennifer on hers. With your coaching her cake is going to be edible (which is more than you can say for her past baking ventures). 

"Okay these need to cool before we ice them."

"Good, its lunch let's go get something."

You follow her out your front door, both of you pulling on your jackets as Jennifer chats on about how the textile group has needed her for the occasional shift. 

"I don't mind though," she says tossing her blonde locks over her shoulder. "I love seeing all the fabric." 

You wish that you could listen to Jennifer, to give all of your attention to her. But it's just not possible at this point, your mind is elsewhere. 

It's back in that room with Joel. 

Tommy and Maria are eating when you and Jennifer arrive to the dining hall. They wave you over with a smile and the two of you bring your trays to their table, joining them. 

Maria is wearing Douglas across her chest and he is milk drunk, passed out and grunting slightly in his sleep. 

"Hi you two."

Maria looks exhausted with dark hollows under her eyes. But she smiles anyway, kissing Douglas's forehead and turning to you. 

"How have you been?"

"Good how about you?"

"Tired," she smiles weakly. "Oh, I meant to ask if there was any chance you'd be willing to make some more flowers for us? I don't mean to be selfish but I'd just love Douglas to have some bright yellow ones in his room."

"Of course!" You're delighted that you can do something to help your friend. "I'd love to, I'll work on it this weekend." 

Maria gives your upper arm a gentle squeeze of thanks, whispering to Douglas that the nice lady was going to make his room beautiful. 

"Seems we're all gonna be working hard this weekend," Tommy muses over his coffee. "Gotta start getting some of the holiday stuff out of storage at our place."

You wrinkle your nose in surprise. 

"Christmas isn't for over a month."

"Yeah but it takes a lot to put on a holiday party for the town," Tommy says through a bite of salad as if you should know this already. 

"Tommy this'll be her first one," Maria reminds him. 

"Oh shit that's right," Tommy nods just as Jennifer retakes her place across from you. Tommy motions to her with his fork.

"Jenny knows all about it."

"What do I know all about?"

"The yearly holiday party."

Jennifer immediately grins enthusiastically.

"My favorite event of the year. The whole town comes out, everyone brings food, there's a band, dancing, booze, presents... It's always so much fun and goes until the next morning usually."

"We decorate the big barn by the stables," Tommy continues and you see the genuine joy in his eyes, like thirty years have been stripped away and he's just a sweet, boy on Christmas morning. "It's a big job, but with enough volunteers it goes pretty smooth." 

"We'll help you," Jennifer says out of nowhere before looking at you. "Right?"

The thing you love most about Jennifer is also the thing that drives you the most insane. She's always wanting to help people, and that would be fine if she didn't try to rope you in with her. 

Even if you didn't want to volunteer there's no possible way that you can say no now. Tommy is glancing over at you with an expectant raise of his eyebrows, Maria matching him. 

"Yeah of course. What do you need done?"

"Well we got music, set up and tear down taken care of, that's usually the hard stuff," Tommy says, rubbing his beard absently as he looks off in the middle distance. Then he snaps, remembering. "How about decorations?"

"Sure," Jennifer nods. "I love decorating, plus I worked in textiles so I have access to fabric and stuff." 

"Great," Tommy says looking overjoyed. "Joel'll be happy to have the help."

"Joel?""

Both you and Jennifer blurt the name out at the same time, though for very different reasons. 

"Yeah Joel is in charge of cutting down and decorating the tree this year. Guy who normally does it broke his leg last week." 

"Decorating a tree doesn't really sound like a three person job," you reason, pushing your carrot stick around your plate. 

"You haven't seen how big the tree is," Tommy grins. "Joel's gonna get a big one, at least twelve feet. Plus there's hanging the lights around the barn and all that stuff."

"Leave it to us, Tommy." 

Jennifer is fucking beaming as she goes back to her lunch, Maria and Tommy are exchanging smiles, but all you can do is hold in the nerves that begin in your stomach. 

Tommy and Maria depart shortly thereafter with the latter giving you a squeeze to your shoulder before she leaves. 

"I can't believe it, more chances to be alone with Joel," Jennifer giggles.

"I'll be sure to give you two a lot of alone time," you snark. "Take a page from your book."

The last thing you want is to be witness to more of them flirting, especially when thoughts of Joel have you feeling so churned up.

Jennifer laughs, about to reply to you when you both hear her name being called. An older woman with spiky grey hair is standing by the entrance to the hall and signalling for Jennifer to come over. Jennifer groans, muttering under her breath so only you can hear. 

"I know that look. She needs help with something at the shop,” Jennifer rolls her eyes as she stands. "Any chance you could ice my cake? I'll pick it up later if that's okay?"

"Uh, I might be out for a walk," you say hurriedly. "How about I just bring it over to you later?"

"You don't mind?"

"Not at all."

"You're a peach!" Jennifer gives your hand a squeeze before excusing herself to join the woman standing expectantly at the dining room doors. 

You watch after your friend, musing that it’s so like Jennifer to want to help everyone. But now that you know why she keeps her days so busy your heart aches for her. How can you think of being attracted to Joel when you know your friend likes him? A friend that's done so much for you. 

Joel Miller isn't worth this anxiety or stress. It's not like he even enjoys your company. You're fairly certain he just gets off on ordering you around. You need to push him from your mind. 

You'll go to dinner tonight, you'll do patrols with him, but you'll keep it professional. You are going to help Jennifer get with Joel. The decision is made. It's the least you can do for a woman who has been through so much. 

Your name is called, breaking you from your thoughts. You glance over your shoulder to see Arthur and Penny headed in your direction with trays. 

"I thought that was you," Arthur says with a grin. "Mind if we join you?" 

"Please do."

The two of them sit shoulder to shoulder across from you. They fold their hands, muttering a quiet prayer for grace and then start digging in. You watch them, amused at how mis-matched a pair they are.

"So whaddya you do around here sweet pea?" Penny asks through a bite of toast. Up this close you notice her front left tooth is cracked. 

"I do patrols," you say. She curls her lip at you, perplexed. 

"Whassat?"

"It's when groups of us that take turns going outside the walls to make sure infected and Raiders don't get in or do damage to the dam." You pause hoping you've explained it decently. "

Penny gives a low whistle. "Dayum, that seems like an awful job. I'd rather clean up garbage any day." 

“It's pretty much just been carrying a gun and riding a horse so far for me."

And mutual pleasure from my nemesis.

"I don't envy ya," Penny says shaking her head and dropping back to her lunch. 

You don't know what to say to that. You watch them eat for a moment, intending on leaving them to it when Arthur starts talking.  

"I wanted to ask you, when did you want to get together for the portrait? I'd love to get back into it and I know I promised you, so I've set up my table by the window and Maria's given me some paper and pencils." 

"She did? That's great." 

You haven't been by to see Maria since the meeting and her anxious looking face keeps floating back into your mind. You know that she must be feeling overwhelmed with everything on top of Douglas. 

"She's a sweet lady," Penny observes. "Gotta bad case a' baby blues though."

You stiffen.

"Why do you say that?"

"Could see it the second I met her," Penny says absently drinking her tea. Her large eyes scan the room, obviously still nervous at the crowds. "Mothers know these things." 

"You have children?"

You don't miss the look of anguish that touches both their features. Before she speaks you know what she'll say.

"Used to."

Arthur is somber when Penny goes quiet, as if behind his pale eyes, his mind is concocting images of the face of the nameless child. Feeling guilty and uncomfortable you want to change the topic, your brain clinging the first thing that comes to your mind. Which happens to be the previous topic. 

"Arthur, I know I asked you about portraits, but I'm actually wondering if I could trade in that favor for a different one."

Arthur shoots you a watery grin.

"Lay it on me." 

///

You take a look at yourself in the mirror over your dresser that evening. It's faded, warped from age and damp. But it does the job and it reflects your tired eyes and your simple clothing. 

You blink at yourself before pulling on a new crimson-colored sweater, one of several that Jennifer gave you a few weeks ago claiming they would go wonderfully with your skin tone. 

You don't know why you're so nervous as you head to Rancher Street with the cake in your hands. You've been invited for dinner, it's sure to be a pleasant night. The cake wobbles in your nervous grip, the frosting gleaming in the fading sunlight. 

When the house comes into view you see Joel sail by in the window, going from one end to the other, reading something. His gaze is fixed, his head tilted to the page. From here you see his strong profile, the curve of his nose, and the pout of his lips. 

Fuck. Don't think about his lips. 

You swallow nervously as you make your way up the creaking porch steps. You take a full moment to stare at the door, looking at the chipped paint and the swept porch deck. 

It's just a dinner. Ellie will be there. I'll be fine. 

You knock gingerly with your free hand, shifting from one foot to the next as you hear footsteps approach. 

Joel opens the door sharply, brows furrowed before he realizes it's you. His dark eyes widen slightly, scanning you and the cake. Immediately your heart begins to pound in your chest, your cheeks heating the longer his eyes linger on your face. 

He's dressed as he always is, flannel and jeans. His hair is tousled, as if he's been running his fingers through it. You look at Joel's wool socks, strangely fascinated. They're a deep grey, worn and thick, they're so human. He stares at you, looking confused and a little surprised. 

"Can I help you?" 

His voice comes rumbling from his chest, deep and measured. You can't stop looking at his neck, noticing the sharp of his jaw, the fullness of his mouth. It has you feeling strangely distracted. 

You lick your lips nervously, inhaling quietly when his gaze drops to your mouth and then back again.

"Uh... I'm here for dinner," you say breathlessly. "I brought the cake." 

He peers at you, confusion clear in his expression. 

"Dinner?"

"Uh, yeah..." Your neck is starting to heat because Joel is crossing his arms over his chest, tilting slightly against the door frame and he doesn't look like he has any idea of what you're talking about. 

"Didn't you invite me to dinner tonight?" 

He shakes his head slowly. 

"But Ellie sa-" you start before slamming your lips together as realization belatedly dawns in your features. 

Ellie wanted you for dinner. Ellie realized that you'd never stay if you thought Joel didn't expressly invite you.

Ellie played you. 

"I'm sorry, I think there's been a misunderstanding," you say, feeling humiliated as Joel continues to stand there staring at you. 

You thrust the cake towards him, your eyes on the ground. 

"I made this for Ellie," you tell his socks. "Could you just give it to her?" 

Joel takes the cake from you, his fingertips trailing over yours as he does. You swallow again, feeling the little bolts of lightning that start at his touch. You watch as Joel quietly prepares to close the door, his eyes now on the ground. 

You hear the twist of the knob and can only make a little scoffing noise in the back of your throat. What had you been thinking? Had you really been so stupid as to think Joel Miller invited you over for dinner when he can barely stand you? 

"Hey," he begins, but you're already starting to move down the porch, humiliation coming off of you in waves. 

You both hear your name and your head jerks up to see Ellie coming up the walkway to the house, her arms laden down with bags. She sees you at the door and smiles broadly before she sees you heading away from the porch. 

"Where are you going?"

"Ellie, I don't really know why I'm here." 

Ellie's immediately deflates, her good spirits dimmed. 

"I wanted you to have dinner with us."

It's impossibly sweet of Ellie to want to spend time with you, but is Joel a necessary part of the equation? 

"Why did you tell me Joel invited me to join you both for dinner?"

"Because I knew if I didn't you wouldn't come."

Ellie's gaze sails away from you and over to Joel who stands with his shoulder against the doorway, arms crossed and brow raised. He looks unimpressed with the pair of you. Ellie gives a grunt, heading towards him with a frown. 

"I invited her for dinner."

"Without askin' me first."

"Last time I checked it's my house too." Ellie shifts the bags in her hands. "I brought dinner and she brought dessert."

"Fine by me. I'll give you two some space." 

Joel goes to retrieve his jacket from the hook by the door but Ellie makes a disapproving noise. 

"No, you have to stay too."

Joel gives an exasperated roll of his eyes. 

"Ellie what is this?"

Ellie looks like she's halfway between a cry and a shout. She doesn't answer until he reaches for his jacket again. 

"It's my fucking birthday, okay?"

Joel goes still, his large eyes looking at her with confusion. A quiet moment passes between the two of them. 

"Your birthday?"

"Yes."

There's a lot of confusion now on your end. The way they act you'd assumed they must have known each other for most of Ellie's life. But that can't be the case if her birthday is such a shock to him.

"I didn't know."

"Obviously. Now will you stop being a grumpy asshole so my friend can have dinner with us?"

Joel looks appropriately admonished, a hand sliding to the back of his pinking neck. He's about to speak but you cut in. 

"Ellie this is a family thing," you try to appeal. "Here, take the cake and you two enjoy."

You go to hand her the cake but she shakes her head resolutely as she moves around Joel. 

"Both of you."

With that she disappears inside leaving you and Joel on the porch in tense silence. He sighs quietly before shifting his eyes to your face. 

"C'mon in then, I guess." 

You follow the two of them into the kitchen, citing that you need to put the cake in the fridge just in case. It's been a long time since you made butter cream icing and you don't want it melting.

You set it amongst the array of vegetables and water bottles inside the ice box. Ellie grabs some plates and utensils while Joel stands watching you both.  

"Grab the lemonade man," Ellie calls over her shoulder at him. You follow her into the other room, watching as she sets the table and indicates for you to take the nearest chair. 

“Joel look what they're serving tonight!" Ellie laughs, holding up the huge plate full of ravioli from the dining hall. Joel gives a droll chuckle. 

"My favorite."

Joel and Ellie exchange a secret smile, but not one that feels exclusionary. More just sweet to witness. Ellie scoops the pasta onto the plates and Joel fills up the glasses and the three of you take your seats and start eating.

You focus all your attention on the ravioli on your plate, taking small nibbles as your stomach is roiling. 

You feel eyes on the side of your face and glance over to see Joel's eyes skimming back to his plate. He looks so sullen, his jaw clenching with every bite. Your eyes drift to the other side of the table to see Ellie. She's eating her pasta with gusto but you can see the defeated look in her face.

Some birthday dinner this turned out to be. 

Joel sits on one end of the table looking uncomfortable, Ellie sits on the other end totally oblivious and you're in the middle of both with your eyes stuck on your dinner. You need to break this silence.

"So how old are you turning?"

"Fifteen," Ellie replies through a mouthful of ravioli. 

"Same age I was when everything happened," you muse. 

"Really?"

"Yeah," you nod. "Maybe that's why we get along so well. I haven't matured past fifteen."

You think you hear a small huff of amusement from Joel's direction but that might just be wishful thinking. The three of you eat your pasta in comfortable silence before Ellie turns her attention on you.

"Were you shooting yesterday? I thought I saw you and that tall guy."

Joel's attention drifts to you; you can feel it boring into the side of your face. 

"Yeah," you answer quietly. "Our friend Je-“ you catch yourself, "our other friend had to work. Normally it’s the three of us.”

“Are you any good?”

“I’m better than when I started,” you smile, motioning to Joel with your fork. “But you can ask Joel, that’s not saying much.”

You dart a glance to see Joel smirking into his dinner. Ellie laughs through a mouthful of ravioli, before she shines her attention over your way. 

“Did you hear about that party next month? Tommy was talking about it today.”

Who could forget the holiday party? The continued forced proximity with a man you just can’t quite figure out.

“My friend volunteered us for decorating,” you say, ignoring the way Joel’s motions still out the corner of your eye. “So I guess we better show up. Plus I’ve never been to one before so I’m curious.”

“We never had shit back like this in the QZ,” Ellie tilts back in her chair. “Closest we got is a pair of socks wrapped up with a bow. Fucking pathetic.”

“Language.”

Ellie rolls her eyes at Joel before looking back at you. “I hope this one is better than that.”

“You might need a dress if you go.”

The two of you glance over at Joel gulping back some of his lemonade. When he sees your dual questioning looks he raises his eyebrows, silently asking what?

Ellie stares at Joel as if she's been struck across the face. "The fuck would I wear a dress for?"

"In the south women dressed up for everything," Joel tells Ellie as he passes her the salad. "Just how things were done. My grammie wore a dress and pearls to go shoppin' in."

You can't help but discreetly glance down at your worn jeans and oversized sweater, suddenly seeing the snags and uneven loops in material. Not exactly dressed up. But you don't own nice, pretty clothes me up of soft feminine fabric. You have denim and leather and wool. Hard, fierce materials for the elements. 

"I hate dresses," Ellie frowns. "And things have changed since your day old man."

"You little shit."

You smile into your pasta. The silence is back over the table and you feel the need to fill it, despite it being a comfortable one. Emboldened by the relaxed mood in all people at the table you shift your question to Joel. 

"Are you going?" You ask casually, your attention on your meal. You hate how the flutter has begun in your chest. 

"I better. I volunteered to help with it."

"I figured you might have just been doing it for Tommy," you shrug. "Can't say I picture you at some big event with dinner and dancing."

"Joel dancing?" Ellie sputters a laugh into her glass of water. 

Joel arches a dark brow at Ellie. 

"Just can't picture it," she says giggling. 

"You know I wasn't born an old man," Joel says amused, turning his attention back to his dinner. "Did plenty of dancin’ in my day."

"Really?"

"S'half the reason Sarah was born," he says with a small smirk before he realizes what he's said.

The table grows quiet as his smile vanishes. Ellie notes the tension, shovelling pasta into her mouth.  You feel a lurch in your stomach at Joel's queasy expression. As if you'd dug a blade down his sternum and exposed his still beating heart to the world. 

It makes you speak without thinking, desperate to show him he's safe to share that side to him. Desperate to let him know he's not alone. 

"My sister loved to dance," you offer up, feeling the dual gazes of the people at the table. 

"My sister was in ballet but she'd uh, she'd do this stupid dance called the Macarena." You laugh a bit to yourself as you recall it. "It was really popular, was on the radio all the time and my dad hated it. I think that's why she kept doing it. He'd act all irritated but he'd always end up laughing." You smile at the memory. "She could always make people laugh." 

Ellie is smiling broadly, fascinated by your stories of this time before and there’s something so comforting, so normal in talking about your sister like this. Like the world isn’t ended and ugly, like she could come walking through the front door right now.

"One time my dad waited until we were in the backyard and then he turned the hose on her when she started singing and doing it,” you say, laughing bubbling forth from you. Ellie joins in, amusement painted in her expression.

Joel is listening with a gentle curl of his mouth. Ellie turns her attention over to him.

"You ever do the Macaroni dance, Joel?"

"Macarena," Joel corrects. "And fuck no, I didn't."

His horrified expression and just hearing the term Macarena in his husky drawl has you laughing loudly, a bright, noisy thing that bursts from you. It brings Ellie along with it, giggling and snorting as Joel rolls his eyes, his mouth twitching as if he's unable to keep the smirk from spreading over his features.  

The laughter ebbs comfortably and you shoot Joel a grateful look. 

"It's nice to remember the good times."

The smile he gives you in return is soft and sweet.

"Yeah. It is."

His gentleness makes your chest ache in a way you don't quite understand. It makes you feel compelled to change the topic. You shift your attention over to Ellie who is watching you both with a small curve of the corner of her mouth.

"Uh, so, I didn't know it was your birthday but I guess I actually got you a gift,” you tell her. “If you want it and Joel's okay with it."

Joel looks on edge, brow raised in confusion. Ellie wears a twin expression, but more relaxed. 

"Really?"

She looks around you for a box or wrapped item. 

"I, uh, found someone to do your tattoo to cover up your scar."

Immediately the room is silent and Ellie’s hand unconsciously places itself on her forearm, hidden under her striped sleeve. Your eyes ping pong between the two of them, concerned you’ve done something wrong. Joel is quiet, his dark eyes surveying your face as if he doesn't know what to make of you.

"If you wanted it," you amend. 

"Are you serious?" Ellie is wide-eyed.

"Yeah it's this new guy, Arthur. He just came to town with his wife. He does stick and poke tattoos and he owes me one so..." You trail off before forcing yourself to finish. "If you wanna see his work I'll introduce you to his wife. She's covered in them and they're gorgeous." 

Joel is still quiet and you're not sure what to make of the silence. You frown over at him, grimacing slightly. 

"Is that okay, Joel?"

Joel tilts back, one forearm lying casually on the table, the other resting on the back of his chair. 

"I'll wanna meet this guy. Make sure he's trustworthy."

"Of course."

"If he is... Well, it's not my body not my choice. But if you want my opinion Ellie, I'd say it's a damn fine idea."

Relief blooms in your face as Ellie gives a squeak of delight. Joel is still looking at you though, face relaxed. 

Ellie is still staring at you a beat before whipping her gaze to Joel. The two of them share a private grin before Ellie turns round to look back at you. 

"Can we go tonight?"

You laugh. "No, but I can see if there's room in his schedule later this week. If you come to lunch in the dining hall tomorrow his wife might be there."

"Awesome!" 

You smile back at her, feeling a familiar tug under your ribs every time you're happy. A measure of guilt mixed with joy. It makes your eyes wet and you push back from the table needing a moment to breathe. 

"I'll go grab your cake," you mutter, striding from the room. You hear the two of them chatting quietly behind you as you pull the cake from the fridge. 

You search the drawers for three plates and a knife, sniffling slightly. All you can think of is this bubbling joy and how she's not here to see it, to feel it, to live it too. 

You take a moment to stare at the pale pink cake. The icing on it is lumpier than you would have liked, but you'd been rushed for time. You look at the sliced strawberries and delicate whirls and you frown. 

This cake couldn't be less Ellie. Ellie is dark berries and bittersweet chocolate. She's not strawberries and pale pink icing. You idly wonder why you made this specific one for her today. 

You know why.

You cut into the cake to shut up the voice, noting how dense it ended up being with each pass of the blade. You cut it into several pieces, wiping at your eyes with the back of your sleeve with each slice. 

You feel a presence behind you; footsteps slow as they make their way next to you. Joel deposits the empty dinner dishes into the sink with a light clatter. You inhale his clean laundry and wood shavings scent, feeling dizzy. You wait for him to leave, but he’s standing there beside you, his frame sturdy. You drag your eyes up his chest to his face.

"That was kind of you, doin' that for Ellie."

"Oh, I'm not doing anything," you say with a shy lift of one shoulder. "Just the organizer."

Joel nods, tongue lodged in the side of his cheek as he stares at you thoughtfully. You let your hair fall in front of your face, worried he'll see the sheen to your eyes. It effectively blocks him out as you plate one of the cake pieces. 

"She's a good kid," you offer, knife gliding over the dish. "She deserves good things." 

"She does."

"Arthur is really nice," you tell him, hoping that if you continue to distract yourself by talking that your tears won't spill down your cheeks. "And I know he'd be discreet." 

"S'good."

"So if you want to-"

You break off when you feel Joel's fingers sliding through your hair, moving it over your left shoulder so he can peer into your face. His fingers slip down your shoulder blade before leaving your body. You track each movement, body tingling. 

"You okay?

You blink quickly, pulse jumping. His eyes hold nothing but concern in their depths, confusing you. 

"Yep. I'm fine."

He cocks his head slightly, one hand braced against the counter. 

"And the truth?"

You swallow, plating the remaining slices of cake. 

"Do you ever feel guilty that you're alive and others aren't? Like... Every time I feel a little bit happy it's like its wrong." 

Joel nods but he doesn't offer more than that. You're thankful because you're not sure any words could have brought a modicum of comfort anyway. 

You scrub at your eyes with the back of your sleeve before taking a page from Jennifer’s book; forcing a wobbly smile onto your face and motioning to the cake.

“So are we singing Happy Birthday?”

“Not a fuckin’ chance.”

You grin at him, handing him his slice of cake and following him back into the dining room. Ellie there, looking excitedly to you as you slide her cake in front of her. She plucks the strawberry off the top, popping it into her mouth.

You take your lemonade glass and raise it. 

"To Ellie on her birthday," you say with a grin. "May your coming year be full of adventure."

Ellie smiles with a shy tilt of her face into her shoulder. You're surprised when you see Joel raise his own glass. 

"And less joke books."

Ellie sputters a laugh at this, head back her shoulders shaking. Joel chuckles at her and once again you feel like you're witnessing something sweet without being left out. Like they're letting you peek into their secret selves. 

“So was this an okay birthday dinner?” you ask.

“My first real one,” Ellie shrugs. “So it’s a good one for me. Plus I don’t actually know my birthday. I just decided I liked November so…”

She shrugs trailing off, her eyes stuck on the cake like she’s ashamed. You dart a look at Joel to see him similarly surprised at this admission. How could he not know? You glance back at Ellie who looks somber.

“I love that idea,” you enthuse. “I never liked my birthday. I think I’ll move mine to the summer so it’s always sunny when I celebrate. I guess you’ll have to make me a cake for mine, Ellie, so you better start practicing.”

Ellie grins over at you as you stick a fork into your piece of cake, the tension broken. The three of you are quiet as you savor the burst of flavor on your tongues.

“This is so good,” Ellie enthuses. “Way better than anything in the dining hall.”

You smile into your cake, flushing at the praise.

“So aside from a tattoo what would you want for your birthday?” Joel asks Ellie, his soulful eyes sincere. In moments like this you can see so clearly that he is a father, and a dedicated one at that. If Ellie asked for the moon you have no doubt he’d manage it.

“I wanna see a dinosaur,” Ellie replies seriously. “Or see space like in those books you got me.”

"Time travel," Joel nods, grinning. “I’ll see what I can do.”

The three of you chat casually about things in town, about Ellie and school until your plates are empty and Ellie is announcing she’s full after her third piece.

 Before you can start helping with the dishes she has your wrist in your grasp and is announcing to Joel that you and her are going to do girl stuff so he needs to leave you both alone. Joel hides the amusement in his features, nodding as you’re dragged away.

She pulls you into her bedroom, closing the door and motioning for you to follow her. You smile at her, feeling a bit of that sisterly affection flow through you as you watch her pace around her room, looking for something. She moves things on her shelves as she talks to you over her shoulder.

"Are you going to the party with that guy you're always with?" 

"Luke?" 

"Yeah that sounds right. Is he your boyfriend?"

Your eyes fly wide before you give an awkward chuckle. 

"No. Not my boyfriend."

"But you want him to be?"

"I don't really know," you answer honestly, fingers trailing along the edge of her desk. “Jennifer keeps trying to get us alone together.”

Ellie makes a face at this, halfway between exasperation and disgust as she throws back the pillows she moved. It makes you giggle but then feel guilty because Jennifer is truly one of the best people you know. 

"Why do you dislike her so much?"

"I dunno," Ellie shrugs her left shoulder. "Just think she's phony is all. Just like Diana."

"I used to think that too," you tell her honestly. "Jennifer suprised me though. I think you'd like her if you gave her a chance, Diana too."

Ellie just shrugs again, hands in the pocket of her jeans in a way that is all Joel. So much of her is, from her scowl to the way she sticks her lower lip out in thought. She looks over at her dresser, eyes brightening.

“That’s where I left it.”

You watch as she pulls out a dark blue ribbon holding it in front of her.

"I never pictured you as a ribbons in your hair kind of person," you tell her honestly. 

"I'm not." She hands the ribbon to you. “It’s for you. It’ll look nice in your hair.”

You’re touched by this, taking the ribbon, fingers dancing along the frayed edges. It’s a midnight blue, the deep of an ocean. You smile at her gratefully before pocketing it.

“Thanks Ellie, but it’s your birthday you’re the one that should be getting presents.”

“I got enough tonight,” Ellie says, looking away from you shyly. She strides over to the bookshelf, bringing out a book you didn't see during your last visit here. She holds it up to you as you approach. 

"Did you ever read this one? Joel says it's a good one." 

Charlotte's Web. 

You feel your stomach churning the longer you look at the title. The pale watercolor girl and pig. 

"Yeah," you say in a quiet voice. "It's a good one." 

Ellie nods, looking back at it before tossing it onto her bed, obviously her evening reading. She's quiet for a few moments, contemplating something before gazing over at you. 

"Don't tell Joel I'm thinking of going to the party. He'll just make a big deal about it."

You smile, touched by her trust in you. 

"Our secret."

///

When the moon hangs low in the sky and the world feels quiet you find yourself under the big window in your bedroom sitting under a knitted blanket, eyes wide. Your pupils look like little moons themselves, eclipsed when the reflection is shifted as you tilt your head. 

You've always loved looking at the moon. Unlike the sun that can be harsh and unforgiving, the moon is calm solemnity. It's quiet and forgiving. It bathes you in a soft glow and your neighborhood in a quiet still. 

You realize that being with Joel is like being exposed in the sun. Often harsh, unforgiving rays that burn your skin, but when it's warm and gentle attention is on you it's so enticing you want to bask in it. It's not as if you actually enjoy his company. He's fucking insufferable. It's because he withholds so much that when he finally relents and allows a bit of softness to trickle through it's like a stream you want to drown in. 

You were always been the one who wanted to befriend the feral cat, to earn their affection, to let them know you could be trusted. You suppose that must translate into this life now, a desire to tame the wild. 

And now you sit in the night, gazing at darkness, lost in thought. Tonight is one of those nights, the kind where your mind won’t quiet and the world seems more confusing than normal.

Sometimes on these nights under the moon you watch people wander up and down the streets. The night owls that aren't bidden by a clock like the rest of the town. But it’s almost three in the morning and the streets are empty.

It leaves you with nothing but your increasingly frenzied thoughts because if you focus you can still feel the sensation of Joel’s wide fingers buried in your cunt, the rasp of his warm breath on your neck, the husky urging of his rumbling voice telling you to come for him.

I know what you feel like when you're close. Don’t fight it.

Be a good girl and do it.

Give it to me. S’mine

You could write it off as nothing but lust but then dinner with Ellie? It had been a softening, a sweetness you peeked through the cracks of his hard planes. You’d seen love in his eyes for her, compassion for you. And above all you’d felt safety there in his home, a brief flash of it before your past memories caught up with you, nipping at your heels. Then the sensation of his hands moving your hair over your shoulder, the touch all tender and asking nothing in return but your honesty.

Joel Miller confuses you.

And then like some phantom you see him.

He’s there amongst the dreary wet snow, walking – well, stumbling slowly towards your home. He must have been at the Bison – he has the look of a man who’s had one too many, something you’ve never truly witnessed in him before.

You tense up, watching him in your window, knowing he can’t see you in the darkness but still paranoid he’ll sense you. With the moon high in the sky you can see him perfectly, the blue-black shape of his broad body and soft curls. You see when he comes to stand in the center of the street and you inhale softly when his eyes fix on your bedroom window.

He stands there for several minutes just staring, sort of wobbling from foot to foot. For some reason his presence compels you into pulling on a robe and rushing downstairs. Your blood is roaring in your ears and you know your pulse is doing its own little tap dance but it doesn’t stop you from jerking open the door.

"Joel?"

Joel is standing on your porch now with his dark eyes squinting against the light from your home shining out behind you. 

"Joel, it's three am."

Joel just stares at you, a long lingering thing. Something about the intensity of it makes any further remarks die on your tongue. Why did you come down here? Why did you open the door? Why did you invite this awkward moment into your life?

Joel stands there with glassy eyes fixed on your face. His hands are shoved deep in his pockets and for a moment you worry something might actually be wrong. You pull your robe tighter around you before you take a step towards him.

"Joel are you-"

You go silent when he holds up a hand in front of him, palm facing you, silently asking you to stop talking. 

"Just ..." he trails off, voice thick with sleep and alcohol. 

He makes no move to come closer, no attempt to touch you. He just stares at you a few more minutes and then with a satisfied little nod to himself he walks off your porch and into the night. You watch him trail down your steps and then his long legs carry him in the direction of Rancher Street.

------------------------------------------

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[grind-pantera]

Blue eyes sounds so much like his father when he speaks, kinda scary

You guys did this to me YOU GUYS---- You knew it was a bad idea to have your back to the mouth of the nest you shared with Blue Eyes. He had told you on more than one occasion, using rather tedious signs that you weren't sure their meaning until he explained in more detail. You need to keep awareness at all times, especially given the precarious nature of your... Well human-ness in the Colony. Not a threat to many, but to enough that Blue Eyes liked to keep his head on a swivel and urged you to do the same. "(Name)." You didn't bother turning around as you placed another animal pelt, neatly folded, one of those small Human things that Blue Eyes found remarkably endearing otherwise he was just rolling into an unmade bed at night, which it would often end up that way regardless, but he takes it upon himself as a challenge to see how messed up it can get by morning time. That voice, such a delectation to your ears had to be Blue Eyes himself. He didn't speak often, but he had spoken enough to you in the heat of moments, passing fleeting times where you two managed to get each other alone. It was hard around the edges but swept into mild tenderness the longer you thought about, the more you heard. The spark of electricity shot down your spine as you smiled at the sound of your name. "I was waiting for you to come back. Guess what I'm not wearing."

The flirtatious notions hidden in your tone was incredibly underlying but detectable as Blue Eyes drifted towards you. In many moments of obliviousness, he finally did catch on here and there, taking in stride when you were being suggestive, flirty or downright dirty at times ( the latter is reserved for those moments that Blue Eyes is so entangled in his own self that you say something just to get a shock from him ). Twisting your body around, you expected to see your mate but instead came face to face with well... His Father. Astute green eyes locked onto your own, dancing a bit with the implications of your previous words before he dropped his glance to your lips and then off to fixate on a point of interest on the wall to the left. The heat eradicated your insides first to the point where it felt like you were going to throw up before it took its time slowly dancing along the bridge of your cheeks, upwards to the very tip of your ears. You needed to say something before this situation got a lot worse, before you were unable to come back from it. "C-Caesar." You tried to laugh but it was nothing more than a straggled cry of sorts. "G-Geez, Blue Eyes sounds just..." Caesar's eyes narrowed at your words, silent and introspective as always, "Just like you." Managing to stumble that out, you shuffled your feet a bit and scooted backwards until the back of your knees hit the very edge of the nest. "Where is he?" Ah, that's why he was here. He was on the prowl for his Son. Made sense, you thought to yourself and placed a hand on your cheek experimentally. Yup, still hot under your touch, finger tips lining along your cheekbone before you dropped your hand slowly, "He uh... Went fishing with Ash. He was supposed to be back soon---" "I gathered than from your... Lack of wearing something." You blinked, mouth drawing open to say something but nothing came out other than a small puff of air. If you didn't know any better, and had you not been with Blue Eyes, you would almost presume Caesar just... flirted.

"I-I'll let him know you need him when he gets back." Giving one last glance at you, head to toe, slower than you would have liked as he lingered on a few fixed points along the way, Caesar only nodded and turned to walk away.

[btsmosphere]

Supercharged | JJK

Chapter 11: Right Beside You

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🗲summary: It starts with a blow to the chest that changes your life. When your city’s most celebrated hero pays a visit, it turns out the noble Bolt has no trouble tossing lives aside. Lives that won't be missed. Lives like yours. Seven mysterious and powerful men give you another chance – one that starts to feel more like a curse the moment you meet golden boy Jungkook. The boy who wants you as far from his brothers as he can get you. Is it you he hates, or the blue lightning that now runs through your veins? And could it be his golden light that illuminates your heart when darkness threatens? 🗲this chapter: Jungkook has you to thank, if only he knew how.

🗲pairing: jungkook x female reader 🗲word count: 5.7k 🗲genre: angst, action, eventual fluff, enemies to lovers, slow burn, superheroes/villains au, found family 🗲rating: pg15 🗲warnings: violence with superpowers, swearing, past trauma (mentioned assault and torture), mentioned homelessness

a/n: the found family is strong with this one😌🥰 hi everyone, thank you for joining me for this next part of the journey! sorry for being super offline this week, it's been an exhausting one and I'm still a bit mentally checked out as I write this note, but all of the positive comments have been lovely to see🥰special note for the anon who wanted a sneak peek, I just couldn't find a good spot to post for this chapter and didn't have the energy to comb through for one either. I'll consider for future parts when I have more time to do so, but in the meantime I would love just to hear what you enjoyed so far💞enjoy the chapter!

Jungkook didn’t speak to you about that night. Barely even looked your way the next morning when you slunk in to have breakfast.

It was entirely unfair that he was there bright and early, looking completely put-together in that handsome way he always did – or maybe it was one of the perks of having a face like his. A lucky side effect of his stubbornly ignoring you was that he didn’t seem to notice, certainly not acknowledge, your envious staring at him, before you were able to catch yourself and rid your mind of these thoughts.

You, however, had only gone back upstairs when you felt your eyes drooping again, long after Jungkook had disappeared. Even then, it was to fitful sleep. All the midnight epiphanies in the world weren’t about to make you forget your guilt over Hoseok.

So now, it was safe to say you were tired.

Hunching over a plate, you said little, but at least tried to smile at Hope, who caught your gaze. Yoongi eyed between the two of you, and you shrank again, unable to stand the thought he was also wary of you. Maybe Jungkook was just the most open about it.

You wondered over your toast whether Jungkook had a similar reason for being awake last night. Whether he knew yours.

Did he realise that you had been up because of your guilt-ridden nightmares? Would that make him feel better, to know you were being punished for your actions by your own psyche?

You hadn’t thought to question his own presence in the training room at night until now, though. Not that it was a particularly pleasant train of thought. Did he have nightmares of his own? Worse still, were they the same as yours? Had your near miss caused him the same fear it had you, enough to invade his sleep?

At the end of the table, Jungkook spoke in a low voice to Jin. There was no chance for you to guess what they were talking about.

Yet you were still watching. You couldn’t look away, almost wondering if you could see inside his head if you looked hard enough. Puzzle him out.

A scraping sound and movement beneath your hand jerked your attention away.

Your eyes darted to your plate – or where it had been. They followed as it dragged itself swiftly across the table, stopping in front of a clasped pair of hands. And Jimin’s eyes, intent on you under raised brows, made you shift.

“Well, if you’re not going to eat it,” he smiled innocently.

With a pout, you made a swipe for the toast you had abandoned on your plate in your (rather long) moment of distraction. The plate, of course, swiftly darted away from your reach, then switched directions.

Huffing, you gave up, slouching back sulkily in your chair while Jimin laughed.

Another hand reached over to slide your breakfast back to you, this time met with no protest. Jimin was still laughing, glittering pink dying in his eyes, and you smiled gratefully to V, your food restorer.

Lesson learned, you did keep your attention to yourself this time as you finished without looking back up.

As such, you missed the sharp eyes that had finally turned towards you.

At a loss, and not keen as usual to head to training, you followed Jimin and V over to the couch and sunk into it after breakfast, ready to waste away some of the morning. The other two kept muttering between themselves, but you were happy to let them go on unbothered.

A weight dipping the cushion beside you made your head turn in surprise.

Hope flopped against the back of the sofa, looking up at you with a smile.

“Did I ever tell you how I got my powers?” he said, tone casual.

Meanwhile, you tried not to widen your eyes. While all the boys, for obvious reasons, knew about the cause of your powers’ arrival, you weren’t sure about theirs. It wasn’t something you could just… ask.

Or so you thought.

It had been one of the worst nights of your life, so you imagined it was similar for them. Why should they want to share that with someone they didn’t trust?

Maybe Hobi did trust you, though. Because when you shook your head, he shifted his elbows onto the back of the sofa, leaning forward to confide in you.

“I was a student,” he began the tale, “training for stunt work on the side. I had to work this shitty all-night convenience store to afford it… not exactly in the safest end of town.”

You could only imagine it all too well. You realised Jimin and V had stopped their chatter, lapsing into silent attention to the story, although they must know it already.

“One night, some random guy tried to rob the place. When he started attacking a customer, I vaulted the cash desk to stop him. He beat the shit out of me. Had a crowbar and everything. But then, when I was on the floor – couldn’t move anymore, not even stand – it’s like I suddenly woke up. I don’t know how else to describe it.”

Watching his face carefully, you found no words. It was clear the experience had been terrifying, his expression clouding for a moment as he told you the worst of it. You had never seen him look so serious.

He shook himself lightly, meeting your eyes again, and the normally permanent smile returned to his face.

“Suddenly I got the energy to fight back. Since then, I’ve moved faster, been stronger, than I ever was before. It turned a few heads on the stunt team, which is how Namjoon got wind of me.”

“Wow, that’s… scary,” you settled for, though it didn’t do his story justice.

“Yeah,” he nodded, before turning fully to you, a look fixing you in place. “Nothing compared with a slip in training.”

You wilted at the painful reminder which blindsided you. So that’s what this was about?

Hope clapped you on the shoulder.

“I still trust you, yeah? That’s not up to Jungkook.”

Nodding, you finally managed a weak smile of your own.

“Thanks.”

Not knowing how to settle back into the sofa, you shifted and spied V whispering something to Jimin. Jimin shifted back to look him in the face, brow tilting in question. V nodded.

Then Jimin spun to you.

“Tae also wants me to tell you… how he got his powers.”

Your eyebrows shot up.

“Really,” you shifted your gaze to V, “don’t feel you have to. It must be tough-”

“It may be hard to talk about, but you should hear it,” Jimin assured you, “we want you to know.”

Your heart softened at this double show of trust. Giving a nod, you watched Jimin take a bracing breath.

“I was the one who found him,” he began, “Namjoon sent me. He heard about the place, wanted to investigate… it was a testing centre. They were keeping him there like a prisoner, seeing what stuff they could inject until he…”

Jimin choked off the sentence. You didn’t want to hear the end of it.

Jimin’s eyes were wide and betrayed such dazzling emotion you could hardly look. It was no wonder he was such a fierce protector of V, that they loved each other so strongly.

“In the end, they gave him fire. We’re not even sure if they meant to, if they knew what they were doing. But they were using him, and I had to get him out of there.”

Letting silence stretch for a moment, you waited until it was clear he wasn’t going on.

“Good,” you spoke quietly. Shifting your eyes to V, you found him looking at you calmly, though the darkness in his eyes was heavier than normal. “I’m glad you made it here.”

Jimin squeezed his hand.

Though you tried to swallow it down, you couldn’t help your next question. You wouldn’t ask what happened to Hope’s would-be killer, but this…

“What happened to the lab?” you whispered.

V’s gaze remained unblinking.

“Burned,” he said, in that rare, low voice.

Not leaving his gaze, you only nodded.

You may have been accepted by your friends. Their trust bolstered you, it did, only… Something didn’t sit right while you were still so perplexed at your precarious footing with Jungkook.

When he did show up, Jungkook seemed oddly distracted all morning. Weirdest of all was that his mood didn’t drive him away to the gym like usual. He sat at the end of the sofa until Yoongi arrived, fishing controllers from the dreaded Drawer of Cables. Playing a few rounds of video games was fun, but you still found yourself glancing a little too often at the detached Jungkook. When a controller got passed to him, he nearly won without breaking into a sweat, only to apparently zone out and fall off the map near the end.

The others laughed at him and yelled their own victories, the two of you the only ones not joining in. At least you cracked a grin, but Jungkook seemed to have drifted.

Maybe, with the others knowing him better than you did, their lack of notice was a good sign. Surely you couldn’t be the only one caught so off-guard by his silence? Or maybe it was because of last night. None of the others had heard your odd midnight conversation.

With Jungkook acting this way, you had wondered how training would play out. If he would even show. You wouldn’t blame him after yesterday with Hobi, and… whatever that had been last night.

No, you wouldn’t blame him, but strangely you found yourself hoping for the opposite in any case. Some sign from him about what last night meant… or at least that you should forget about it.

In the event, your wondering was never answered.

Namjoon marching into the room wasn’t what any of you had expected. Usually, that meant business. And today was no exception.

“Are you guys ready to head out?”

Which meant that if you weren’t, now was the time to prepare. All you needed to do was grab shoes, and then you were following Jin as he grabbed keys and headed down the front stairs to the garage.

Behind you, Hobi was desperately searching for a second shoe, only having found one in his room. Yoongi had been begrudgingly roped into helping, and his sighs filled the air at regular intervals as he found yet another spot empty.

Jimin was hopping around as he tried to run to the door before tying his laces.

Namjoon walked through the sudden chaos, unfazed, raising his voice slightly.

“Bosun’s just had to flee his place at the edge of town. Says there are people inside already. So we’d better move.”

The garage door slid open as you reached it. Jungkook was already waiting. He had been the first one to his feet when Namjoon entered with a battle plan, and you got it. Some good action would force unwanted distractions from your mind like nothing else.

He pushed away from the wall, squaring his shoulders as he stepped towards the waiting cars. And stumbled.

You bit down on your lip, but it was as if he could sense your instinctive laughter. Yours were the first place his eyes glowered as he recovered balance.

Ducking your eyes, they landed on a sneaker strewn on the ground.

“Oi, Hobi!” you called, launching his missing sneaker up the stairs past Namjoon, who was now descending.

“Thanks!” came his call, and then he was beside you in an instant, yellow light flashing in his eyes.

“Hey, only one of us has speed powers!” Yoongi complained, jogging down the stairs last.

Namjoon’s eyes flickered over the lot of you and then you were piling into cars. Jimin tugged you after him and V into Jin’s car, while the others took the neighbouring one.

With the unexpected attack already apparently underway, Jin cut all the corners he could as you sped across the city. You remembered seeing Bosun’s name in one of the various files Jin was sifting through as he and Namjoon desperately tried to strategise their way out of this game already in motion. Clearly, his wasn’t one of their top places of concern as he hadn’t been relocated yet.

You were beginning to see why. The streets you passed grew less and less maintained, cracks, weeds and broken signs whizzing past your window. This was more similar to the end of town you used to live in, before Bolt. And you would assume it to be way off his radar.

Apparently not.

Jin pulled up in some alley beside an unassuming and leaky-looking warehouse. Fumbling to open the glove box, he passed you each a small receiver along with instructions.

“Jimin, V, take that side. The back entrance is around there. With any luck they aren’t expecting us, but be ready for anything. Y/N, go the other way, check it’s clear. Then head to the front where you’ll meet the others.”

Nodding hastily, you all scrammed from the car. Jimin patted your shoulder and flashed you a grin – a nod from V and they were sprinting away to the left. You peeled off right instead, focus setting in the moment your feet were in motion.

Rounding a corner, you were faced with a near-identical alley, narrow and shadowy with puddles nestled in cracks in the concrete.

Eyes scanning, you first checked the windows in the long expanse of wall. There were few, high up and tiny. From here, you could see no one looking back out at you. Hopefully that meant the surprise factor was still on your side.

It was when your eyes returned to the street in front of you that your steps faltered. Closer now, a figure became clear in the shadows that you hadn’t made out before.

Slowing, you squinted at them, hands already twitching. But they hadn’t made any move, although they had clearly seen you. Crouched against the wall, they looked directly your way as you approached hesitantly. Maybe they just didn’t know who you were? But if they were guarding this place, surely any passerby could be classed as a threat?

So why weren’t they attacking?

You stopped fully, now only paces from them. You saw it was a young man, maybe even a teenager. His eyes were large as they looked at you from below unkempt hair, and while they had a hard edge of practised hostility, all you read there was wariness and fear.

Hands retreating under fraying sleeves, he shifted uncomfortably the longer you stood in front of him. Worn-out shoes with a hole in the side shifted near to a puddle.

Frowning, your eyes caught sight of a bag he was sheltering with his body.

Breath slowed uncomfortably in your throat as it dawned on you. He wasn’t with the people attacking the warehouse – he probably had no idea anything was even going on in the building behind the two of you.

“You should get out of here,” you met his eyes again.

He didn’t need telling twice. Since you had showed interest in him, his discomfort had been clear, and he finally shot to his feet, still clinging to the overstuffed backpack behind him.

Then your eyes were torn from his nervous ones by a blast from the end of the alley.

Whipping around, you were briefly dazzled by a burst of gold light. Inexplicably, it put you at ease – or the knowledge of who was behind it did.

What had you instantly back on edge were the two silhouetted figures that now ran across the entrance to the alleyway. The sight of weapons clutched to their chests had your fingers flexing, feeling your powers simmer defensively.

It had begun.

A second after the armed people emerged, one of them was sent to the floor by a human-sized bullet – Hope. Their gun skidded away, landing in a shallow puddle with a splash.

Starting forwards intently to aid your team, you spared one last glance back at the boy you had found in the alley.

Those same fearful eyes were now fixed past you at the violence unfolding as it spilled from the warehouse entrance. Rigid, he seemed frozen to the spot.

“Go!” you barked, “I mean it!”

And then you were running. If he had any sense, the kid would get moving.

Another sharp blade of gold light descended, nearly knocking over the remaining assailant ahead of you, but they ducked and staggered on, the blast clashing with the neighbouring wall. Tracing the source of the attack, you spied Jungkook’s vantage point on the roof, his head visible though only a brief blur as he raced after his target.

Fixing your eyes front, you charged head-on at the fleeing man.

And he spotted you too.

Whatever weapon you were facing now, you didn’t fancy finding out. He was aiming it, giving you a clear view down the barrel.

Your step never once faltered. You didn’t need to reach for a weapon.

You were one.

Blue fired from your fingertips before his could move on the trigger. It caught him, flinging him backwards, flipping before slamming against the ground.

Still hot-footing it to the heat of the action, you glanced to Jungkook, smirk already lifting your lips, ready to share the momentary victory.

But he hadn’t changed direction. Instead, he was flying towards you, descending from the rooftop on a pillar of gold, and his other arm was aiming behind you-

Turning, you caught sight of the fleeing boy, almost out of sight now.

Your heart dropped in slow motion, but your body acted without waiting for permission.

Well-aimed gold streaked down the alley. Hand raising, you threw an arrow of blue to meet it. Lightning collided in the air, your shot throwing his off, a missile of sparking blue and gold smashing against the warehouse.

Outrage painting his face, Jungkook hit the ground, already dashing towards you and the boy. Readied his arm again…

“Jungkook!” you cried.

Not stepping out of his path, the two of you practically crashed into each other. Your hand caught his shoulder, restraining him as you twisted to look behind you.

The boy was on the ground, metres from the impact. As you watched, he scrambled to his feet, hoisted his backpack over a shoulder and ran, finally disappearing into another street.

“He’s not with them,” you panted, “…he’s just a kid.”

Turning back to Jungkook, you expected rage, frustration… but not this. His eyes were fixed on the spot the boy had fled from. As his eyes tracked, slowly, back to your face, he inhaled softly. Held it. Slack-jawed horror washed over him.

Struck by the force of emotion surfacing so suddenly in his eyes, you lightened your grip and took a step back.

A heavy frown pressed on Jungkook's brows, gaze once again growing distant, drifting to the alley behind you.

“I didn’t think…” he mumbled, but his lips stilled again, parted in horror.

“You’re not supposed to expect it,” you whispered.

Eyes fixed on Jungkook’s intently, you caught the sharp flicker as they returned to you. Lucidity flooded back to him and his throat bobbed in a hard swallow.

As he looked at you, his frown eased imperceptibly, realisation widening his eyes instead.

“He would be dead.” Jungkook’s voice was brittle.

Your heart was only now slowing in your chest, the shock of adrenaline subsiding. All it took was another blow from somewhere behind the pair of you, ringing out through the confined space, to pull you away from Jungkook.

His head turned; you stepped to see around him. Dropping your arm fully at last, you broke into a sprint once more, knowing even before you heard his steps that Jungkook would be right beside you.

You eyed the warehouse and alleyway disappearing in the rear-view mirror. Soon they were eaten up by the maze of roads taking you back into the city that was none the wiser.

There hadn’t been many more attackers. No one of note, only bolstered by weapons of Bolt’s previous acquisition. In the end, the group of you had driven them out with relative ease.

Which was good. Bosun had shaken hands with Namjoon outside in relief as he found his work still intact.

But you wondered if you were the only one nagged by another win without sight of the orchestrator. Bolt seemed to follow you everywhere, without ever showing his face. You took your eyes from the cars around you to a news stand as you drove past. Blue splashed over the front cover, Bolt took his place in the glorious spotlight, right where he wanted.

Did the readers know what he had working behind the scenes?

The weapons these fighters were decked out with, you knew them. But you also knew Kuyang had never made so many of them as you were now encountering on each shout.

“Do you think Namjoon-hyung will mind if we skip training?” Jimin was nudging V with that playfully devilish grin of his, “we basically had a workout already!”

Glancing at the rear-view, you saw Jin raise a brow and shared a private smile with yourself. You didn’t think Namjoon was the one Jimin should be worrying about.

Then you sat up.

“Hey, Jin?” you spoke.

He hummed, glancing to you in the mirror, but your eyes had caught something else.

“The same car is still behind us.”

Jin’s hands tightened on the wheel and he shot a look to follow yours.

“You’re sure?”

He braked a little too sharply as a car pulled from a turning ahead of you.

“I’m sure. Not that red one, the black one behind it, do you see?”

Narrowed eyes scanning the mirror, he nodded.

“Since when?”

“A good few roads. Since the lights.”

Jimin had gone quiet, all three of you now watching Jin closely for an answer as he pursed his lips. Though you sincerely hoped it was simply a harmless coincidence, you had left the busiest roads and were nearing home. Best not to take chances.

“Let’s see what they’re about,” Jin said, voice low and calculated.

A challenge.

A turning approached, so he indicated and slipped into the right-turn lane. Tentatively, you turned your head, enough to eye the black car. It carried on behind the red one and you relaxed – for a moment.

Then, just before you were obscured by the corner, it, too, switched lanes.

Your car took a collective breath in.

Jin tilted his head.

“Interesting.”

Chewing your cheek, you glanced sideways. The same nerves were reflected back in Jimin and V’s eyes.

“Jimin, can you text Namjoon that we have a potential tail?” Jin asked, tone suddenly lighter, ���might be late. And in the meantime-”

He turned again, taking you down a much smaller road. The opposite direction to your original destination.

Driving straight on, he waited until the black car showed itself behind you. There was almost no doubt in your mind now.

“Joon says he’ll see us back home,” Jimin said, lifting his phone up surreptitiously to snap some images of your stalker, “and that they’re all clear. Although maybe whoever’s following them is just more subtle about it.”

Jin chuckled with him, but it was brief.

“Well, without Y/N spotting it, I’m not sure I would be much the wiser,” he mused.

Another glance in the mirror, and the black vehicle was indicating, pulling between parked cars. Didn’t tuck itself all the way in, with what could be an effort to keep a view clear of your car heading further down the road.

“Oh, were heading this way after all, hm?” Jin asked dryly.

Looking back to the road with determination, he took a right. Not long after, another right, where he swung around and stopped, facing out onto the road you had just left.

It didn’t even take that long. Your lungs hadn’t even started straining from the breath you held.

The car drove in front of you.

Jimin was ready, taking another picture as the driver passed, but there was no double-take or visible glance your way. They had a hood up, mask and dark glasses on.

The car carried on, but this game wasn’t going to last. As Jin pulled out, they were already slowing down, turning onto the road parallel to yours.

A burst of speed had you pressed back in the seat.

“Jimin, can you stop this guy? I’ve seen about enough.”

Jimin hummed a casual agreement, but you saw the smirk that grew on his lips, the glint in his eyes before pink light bled into them.

Sure enough, at the next intersection, the black car was right there. Jimin held a hand up, splayed his fingers, and that was all it took. Your stalker hit an invisible wall. The tyres froze, car stuck fast on the road it had been speeding down.

Jin put his foot down.

Several turns and roads later, with no more signs of the same vehicle, or of any repeat followers, he finally turned on himself, resuming your intended route at last. Didn’t stop you all keeping lookout, even as you waited for the hidden wall to slip aside and let you home. Especially then.

It was a relief to spill up the stairs to the scents of cooking – tteokbokki, if you weren’t mistaken.

The second lot of relief came when you saw Yoongi was the one behind the stove. Bound to be a solid meal, trusting him.

While the group noticed your return, Hobi jumping to his feet and Namjoon striding forwards, checking on all of you, you paused on the top step. Just cast your eyes around, for a second. Sometimes these moments would hit you from nowhere. Some outdated part of you expecting to have to cook for yourself after getting back from an already exhausting day, only to find your team making things easier.

In the small ways, just as much as the big, your life had changed. In the small ways, it was definitely for the better.

Letting a fond, awed smile slip onto your face for a second, you breathed in.

Jimin’s laugh met your ears, and you turned back to the moment. He clapped a chuckling Jungkook on the shoulder, giving a playful shove before he moved on towards the table. You moved to follow, only to find Jungkook hadn’t budged.

Residual smile still on his face, eyes wide and cheerful, his gaze rested on you. There was a slight hesitation, his smile growing fainter, nervous as he appeared to stall in front of you.

“Thanks,” he said quietly. It would almost be conversational; if only you had had a casual conversation with the guy, you would know. “Glad you’re all back safe.”

At your stunned stare, he squeezed a hurried smile back in place, and fled to Yoongi’s side in the kitchen. Your mouth hung open, eyes following Jungkook’s back even as Jin marched past.

“Yah, trust me to take care of the kitchen hyung,” Yoongi complained to the back of Jin’s head as he bent to sample a spoonful of sauce.

“I’m just taste-testing,” Jin defended a second later with a cheeky grin on his face.

Yoongi didn’t bat an eye.

“Well if the inspector’s not happy, report me,” he harrumphed, “go sit down.”

Jin allowed himself to be shoved table-wards, self-satisfied smile permanently on his face.

Still hovering beside Yoongi, Jungkook finally looked back at you. It would have been subtle, too, if you had been able to tear your eyes from him yet. He gazed up from below his hair.

A small, startled expression flitted across his face – not so intimidating now, huh? – before your view was mercifully blocked by Namjoon.

“I heard you noticed the tail back there. Good spot.”

Smiling, you bobbed your head.

“Thanks,” you eyed the floor, “I don’t even know what made me look for it.”

“Whatever it was, I’m glad you did. It got us all back here. I’ll be working on finding out who they were, though, and what they were doing after us.”

Your eyes flicked back to his face, a flicker of unease shooting across your expression.

He sighed, his turn to drop his gaze this time.

“I’ll keep you all posted. For now, it’s done. And I believe dinner is in order.”

Stepping aside, he ushered you past, only somewhat assuaged. That hadn’t been some usual attack which you could put down all-guns-blazing. Someone following you… that was different. Someone playing a long game. And there was one person you could already think of who was running one of those.

In the time you had been speaking with Namjoon, Jin had somehow returned to the kitchen, though Yoongi was silent about it this time.

Yoongi passed dishes as Jin scooped food into them, Jungkook rooting through the cupboards for something too. Slipping into a seat, you watched them idly. Jin set the steaming plates on the side, which is when Jungkook leaned over to chop chives over the top. You sure were in for a luxurious meal. A decent reward, you thought.

Turning with the next plate, Jin paused. Didn’t set it down. He stared, frozen, at Jungkook.

Catching on a second later, the younger man looked up like a caught puppy. Even if he hadn’t been doing anything nefarious.

An amused smile stole over Jin’s face.

“Since when do you cook so fancy, Kook?” he grinned.

“F-fancy?” Jungkook blinked. “Isn’t this… how you make it?”

Jin shrugged, setting down the plate and turning to grab the one Yoongi proffered impatiently.

“Never thought to add them,” Jin mused, “looks nice though. Tell me, where did you pick up such cheffing tips?”

Jin was half-joking, still plating up, but something was dawning on the younger man.

Jungkook looked comically horrified, gaze darting between the green chives in one hand and the scissors in the other. He paused like that just a little too long to sound casual when he finally regained his voice to mutter:

“This is how Y/N likes it.”

Any hope of sounding nonchalant died as Jin’s eyes bulged from his face. Yoongi froze, eyebrows raising, before looking over his shoulder to you with a questioning smile.

Namjoon, mercifully, looked down to his lap with a private smile, but he was the only one. Hobi broke into a grin and Jimin spun to laugh openly at his younger brother, who looked thoroughly grumpy now. Jungkook’s mouth was fixed in a solid pout, his hard glare not helping in the slightest as the declarations of joyful surprise clearly got to him.

In the face of Yoongi’s now wiggling eyebrows, and a disconcertingly intense stare from V, you laughed weakly.

For a second, your eyes met with Jungkook’s. He snapped his gaze away an instant later, firmly hiding his flushed cheeks with his turned back, recommencing his chive-chopping rather more aggressively.

Jin clapped him on the back exaggeratedly, before scooping a dish up.

“I think this has the most,” he smirked, sliding it to rest right in front of you, “the Y/N speciality, made just for you.”

With a roll of your eyes and an exasperated laugh, you took the bowl.

“Yah, leave off! You brought this on yourself, you know. Why not teach Jungkook your way?”

“Wha-” Jin broke off, flicking a dish towel at Jungkook’s back, “how many times have I made tteokbokki with you, punk?”

Shoulders a little looser, Jungkook ducked out of the way.

“You mean made for me,” he defended.

Leaving Jin to splutter behind him, Jungkook marched over to the table with two more chive-topped bowls of food which he set down a little too hard, landing with loud clunks.

The others dutifully moved on to other things as the plates all reached the table and the lot of you dug in, grateful after an eventful day. When Jin made a comment about the added flavour of the dish, it was genuine and not a dig at their youngest.

Still, Jungkook picked quietly at his food. It may have been bold to claim he was avoiding your eye, as you couldn’t really remember a time he had sought it out, but though he was only a seat across from you, he didn’t once look at you. What was worse was that you couldn’t help but notice. Couldn’t stop your attention straying to him among the boys’ chatter which should have been distracting you.

At least he ate it all.

You made a point to collect his plate once you had all finished. Namjoon had already disappeared, Jimin gathering the rest of the dishes to wash.

Rounding the table, you lifted the empty dish from under his nose, making him look up.

“Thanks, Jungkook,” you said, before he could look away. You didn’t smile, just returned his startled gaze with your own steady one.

He had to know you weren’t laughing at him. Even if a sprinkling of chives was nothing to be embarrassed about in the first place.

Ducking his gaze after a long second, he followed the others to flop down on the sofa.

Watching with amusement, you had to force yourself to move too. You placed the dishes on the pile and distractedly grabbed a towel since Jimin had started washing. It was funny… Not long ago, you wouldn’t have thought the abrasive, menacing Jungkook you knew then could ever look like a deer in the headlights.

“What are you smiling about?”

An elbow from Jimin brought you abruptly from your reflections. Yelping, you swatted him away.

“Nothing,” you insisted, grabbing desperately for a dish to dry.

Your response only encouraged the teasing smile spreading across your companion’s mouth. You didn’t like the way his eyebrow quirked. He fixed you with a scarily knowing look that had you gulping.

Then he shrugged and turned back to the dishwater.

THE CHIIIIVES😂Thank you for reading! How are you enjoying them all getting along?💜

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[heart-of-the-morningstar]

Dress Up: Chapter 4 - First Preview

Yes, rejoice! Dress Up is alive!! I know it's been a while since I've updated this story, but now I have a proper place to take it! And if you've seen my post last week, you know exactly where this is going!

If you don't, the end of the preview will clue you in haha

Warning for mentions of intimacy, nothing explicit!

"Thank you for meeting with me on such short notice, Asmodeus," you greeted the King of Lust as you sat down across from him next to his hypnotizing fireplace with dazzling blue flames.

"Oh, your Highness, there's no need for formalities! You know you are more than welcome to just call me Oz," he spoke smoothly. "And it's absolutely no trouble at all! I'll always have time for the King and Queen. And speaking of, it's quite unusual to see you without the King glued to your hip; especially considering the day! I'm curious as to how you managed to slip away."

It's been a year since you and Lucifer tied the knot and what a wonderful year it's been! They say there's no such thing as a perfect marriage, but you're convinced that you and Lucifer had found it. Not a day goes by where this man does not kiss you awake in the morning or ask if there's anything that he can do for you to make your day easier. You both have been working your asses off to continue to help Charlie with the hotel. It's been promising for sure, a few handfuls of sinners have sought help and agreed to stay there, with most making incredible progress. Lucifer especially has been working himself to the bone as of late, doing everything in his power to support his daughter and to make sure no one stands between her and her dream. The poor king has been running himself into the ground, coming home later than promised most nights. Of course, he's always extremely apologetic and always finds a way to make it up to you. But you're never upset with him, explaining that you know what he's doing is important and that you understand completely. Although, you never turn down his apologies, not when he makes you feel the way he does. However, it was your anniversary, and you decided that you wanted to do something special for him, just as he always does for you.

Just within the past year, you found yourself visiting the other six rings of Hell that Lucifer had told you about. The other sins certainly were interesting, but after meeting each of them, you found yourself becoming closest with Asmodeus and Beelzebub as they had been the most welcoming and inviting. Bee was always inviting you to one of her parties and you told her someday soon you would accept her invitation once the craziness of the hotel has subsided. And you found a kindred spirit with Oz, as he himself was also in a relationship with a demon considered far below that of a Sin. It was comforting to know that Lucifer was not the only powerful being in Hell who had fallen for someone whom many considered unworthy of his affection. It took some time, but you learned to ignore those thoughts, whether they came from the outside or within yourself.

Regardless, you knew that Oz was just the demon to help you.

"It wasn't easy, I'll say that much," you laughed, "I practically had to beg him to let me go off on my own today. He didn't want to be apart on our anniversary, but I had to tell him I was picking up a 'surprise anniversary present' and he wasn't allowed to know what it was until tonight."

Asmodeus chuckled. "And what sort of present did you have in mind?"

You looked away and rubbed the back of your neck. "That's the thing, Oz, I'm...not sure. My plan took me as far as meeting with you. I just knew you'd be able to help."

"I see," the demon smiled almost mischievously, "Well, you've come to the right place! You two are some of my best customers, after all." You couldn't help but blush from embarrassment at his comment, knowing full well he was right. "Nothing to be ashamed about, my Queen. It's great that you two find such pleasure in each other and I'm more than happy to provide! Now, do you mind if I ask you some more than personal questions? It'll help me greatly in determining how I can help enhance your experience."

"Umm, y-yeah, that's fine," you agreed shyly. What you and Lucifer did behind closed doors always stayed between the two of you, but Asmodeus was the King of Lust after all, he'd be able to help more than anyone.

"Excellent!" With a wave of his hand, a small notepad and pen appeared. "I promise not to get into the nitty gritty, just wanting to get a general overview. Now, how often would you say you two get down business?"

You gulped. "O-Oh, umm, at least once a day."

Asmodeus began to scribble on his notepad. "Ooh, girl, you really hit the jackpot! Is that full on action every day?"

"N-No," you admitted, "not every day, b-but there's always some form of...intimacy, even if it's small."

"There's no such thing when it comes to lust," Asmodeus winked. "How do you two go about trying something you haven't done before?"

"Well, we always discuss it beforehand," you answered, "we've never done anything that the other didn't agree to."

More scribbling. "Beautiful, a perfect answer. And how about-"

Suddenly, the door behind Asmodeus flew open with a crash. "Ozziiieee!" you heard a rough gravelly voice call out, "We finally got those new orders of vibrators shipped to us that we've been waiting weeks for, so if you wanna...OH SHIT!" Fizzarolli dropped the box he was carrying with a hard thud. The box itself began to vibrate with a loud buzzing noise. In a panic, the imp chucked the box out the door behind him and used his extendible arm to lock it behind him. "Y-Your Highness! I'm sorry for interrupting, evidentially SOMEONE forgot to mention he had an important meeting today!" Fizz glared at Asmodeus who smiled back at him cheekily.

You couldn't help but giggle. "It's alright Fizz, you don't need to apologize! It's always nice to see you."

"Likewise," the jester bowed. "So, what do we owe the pleasure?"

"Well, today's my anniversary with Lucifer and I-"

"Oh, I see!" Fizz cut you off, "You wanna get a special gift for the Big Boss, is that it?" You nodded wordlessly. "If that's the case, I have the perfect suggestion! Oz, did you tell her about the..." Fizz leaned into Asmodeus's ear to whisper, now unable to hear what he was saying. Fizz pulled away from him with a devious smirk while Oz's face had shifted to one of concern.

"Uhh, I don't know about that, Froggie," Asmodeus answered the unknown question. "That hasn't even gone to market yet."

Fizzarolli hopped in Oz's lap playfully, wrapping his robotic arms around his lover's neck. "Oh, come on Oz! We've had it tested countless times and it works like a charm! Besides, I don't recall you being this cautious when we used it, hehehe."

"Fizz!" Oz exclaimed only for Fizz to stick out his tongue in response.

"You know, I'd love to know what you two are talking about," you chimed in, both of them snapping their heads in your direction. You watched as Fizzarolli flashed his signature puppy dog stare at Oz. the king of Lust sighed in defeated and gestured for him to continue, knowing he couldn't say no to his boyfriend's adorable tactics. Fizz jumped up in excitement and made his way towards you, throwing his arms over your shoulder.

"So, tell me," Fizz began, "what do you know about pheromones?"