#but im just sitting here like “everything is bad forever AND i don't even get to have gay fanfiction for my stupid bullshit anime men”

[lorephobic]

idk how to even like. put this pain into words and i would normally vent about this shit on twitter, but the person its about follows me on there so like. anybody have skills for coping with the crushing realization that the person u love most in this world and have built ur life around sees ur current situation together as a temporary hurdle that's preventing them from their truest and happiest self which. is separate from u entirely? anyone know how to deal with this?

[viosjaan]

i don't think you want anything to do with me anymore so i can just vent the texts i want to send to you here

[liiionhearted]

i could be insane over hobbies like building computers or houseplants or something but noooo i want ~fandom~ and my stupid idiot autistic brain can't even let me pick one that isn't full of toxic idiots who want me dead 🤪

(not you beatles fandom, you're good 💕)

[angelismmm]

pairings. blade x gn!reader

synopsis. nsfw alphabet w blade gg ez, a-n only becuz im l-l-lazy....

a - aftercare (what are they like after the deed?)

blud lowkey don't give a shit about you if you aren't that close, lmao

but if you are, probably kind of clingy, and really caring. a lot of cuddling, don't tell me i'm wrong cuz i'm NOT.

in some cases, and instances, those.. 'activities' you both have do make him quite exhausted, and most of the time it really just ends with him showering you, cleaning you up, and just being in his embrace (more utc.)

b - body part (their fave body part, of themselves, and their partner's!)

probably for himself; would be his hands. just in general, plus he knows how well they treat you anyway! so why wouldn't it be his favorite? and for you, probably loves everything, doesn't know what he'd do without it, can't decide on one sole favorite, maybe your stomach and probably your neck!

c - cum (cum, anything to do with it)

will cum on your face, if not, he'll come inside, nothing in between.

i dont know how to elaborate here but um, the way his cum be sprayed all over ur face is just so mmmm to him. makes him hard all over again!

d - dirty secret (self explanatory)

not rly dirty, but wants to see you get a necklace with his name on it, or a collar with his name on it, and while he pounds so recklessly, he wants to see that pretty little pendant of his bouncing up and down on your neck, very fond of the idea, but never would actually say it to you, unless you really push him enough.

e - experience (has bro done the deed before?)

maybe? not that experienced probably, but has messed around with somebody before yes!

he knows what he's doing though, don't worry. but overall probably just did it once or twice, barely can call it sex

he probably read about sex before doing it with you, cause he wanted it to go perfectly.

f - favorite position (self explanatory pt2)

just as long as he can see your face, missionary, cowgirl, let it be anything, just as long as he can see how your face just gets so corrupted because of his big cock.

g - goofy (is bro serious about sex?)

very serious, it's almost funny, but it isn't, he's dedicated, and will show it.

but maybe when you both get closer, and are able to be more intimate with each other, in relationship wise, and etc., sure he'll laugh once or twice about a mistake he's done.

h - hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

um, yes and no?? i don't really know, i can't rly tell, like maybe thrice a week sure, and the rest of the week he don't really care, it gets messy when you both fuck anyways. and yes, black hair, thats it, idk how to elaborate ab this LMAO

i - intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

gets too embarassed. no he will not show his blushing face, even if he's already inside, probably takes like, a round or two before he does

kind of like, he'd giggle about it and go okay bae

but also would be the kind of guy to go, "i want to be the only man, the only person, in this whole galaxy, this whole universe, to make you feel like this."

j - jack off (master bait :D)

yes, very often, no other choice, i cant say otherwise. likes to imagine its you on that monster ahh cock instead of his hand, be real, he the type to do that. uses imagination wisely, and does it when you're away from him, on a mission, or whatever, needs you 24/7 tho

k - kink/s

degrading you like it's his life's purpose. loves you like it's the calm life he's been looking for since forever, but will degrade you, calls you slut, whore, made for his cock, and all that jazz.

oh but facesitting; super big fan, wants to just be in you, tongue up in your hole, while he just strokes his cock, just needs you to sit on his face so bad

be so fucking honest w me, he probably turned on by the idea of getting pegged, or getting anal. won't admit it out loud, but he wants to get treated like a prince. like just wants you to make him feel so good, that's it.

l - location

doesn't give a fuck if other people hear, will fuck you in an alleyway if he feels like it, or if you feel like it, in the public bathroom <3 but just way prefers being in bed with you, feels more romantic, and gives off more feeling to the moment, in his own opinion, will do whatever you're comfortable with.

n - no no

roleplay, anything related to it, it seriously grosses him out

non con, in general, he's disgusted by it, i know that for a fact.

don't degrade him please, he's heard, and been called all kinds of names before, and it's not like he ever liked them.

don't hurt him, it's clear in his skill he does hurt himself in the process</3, im sure he seriously just wants to love you, and wants it back, his degrading is to a small extent, and it's just in the heat of the moment thing!

[bbyquokka]

its me again BUT I CANT HELP IT the new challenge video of minsung... its a different thing BUT. jisung coming home with this outfit.. of course he is tired, he directly heads to living room to catch a breath, before even he can say something you sit on your knees in front of him, he gets what you want and smirks .. you slowly unbelt his pants,,,,,as u give him a head he calling u 'you're so pretty' 'my little slut' as he caress your hair 😖😖😖 you take slow as he guides you. okay enough.

so pretty !!

SMUT BELOW CUT – MINORS, AGELESS & DEFAULT BLOGS; DNI

𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒 | gender neutral reader, idol au, oral sex ( m rec ), some guidance during oral sex, dirty talk & thoughts, degrading name: slut, semi proof read. 𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐃𝐒 | 0.7k ~ ( 749 )

dont repost. dont translate. feedback and reblogs are highly advised and appreciated!

he's so tired. he's spent all day at the studio filming for the lalalala practice video. the theme of the video was racer. he's spent all day dealing with stylists and make-up artists making sure he looks good before entering the dance studio and filming the video with the back-up dancers.

after he filmed the youtube content, it was then advised that him and minho filmed a challenge video for youtube shorts and instagram reels. by that point, he just wanted to go home and luckily for him, it only took one take to do before he was finally able to go home for the day.

he doesn't mind it, of course. it's fresh new content for stays. it's just comeback season is always tiring for him (and everyone else) the schedule forever being packed. interviews here, flying to japan there. stage after stage after stage performances – it's never ending.

due to how busy he has been, his needs have been neglected. you know this more than anyone considering how short tempered he is slowly becoming. you wish you could help him but you know he is also tired from working and most likely just wants to sleep.

but that's far from the case. jisung is tired but he is horny: blue balls horny! he misses you. he misses your touch, your scent, your taste. he misses the way you look at him, pleading for him and moaning for him. he wants you so bad, it hurts! 

he walks into the apartment he shares with you, mumbling a small “hello” before flopping onto the couch. today has been extra tiring and extra hard on him. he didn't even bother getting changed from the racer clothes he was put in. everything he did and everywhere he went he imagined you being with him. he imagined fucking you from behind in front of the studio mirrors. imaging your moans echoing and bouncing off the walls. he's had to try hard not to get hard and it's been so painful for him.

you notice him shifting in his seat. he readjusts himself, giving his semi hard-on a squeeze. he groans, kicking his head back a little and lips parting. you watch him massage and squeeze himself, watch as his cock grows and gets hard in his pants.

“fuck.. i shouldn't be doing this. i need to shower and eat but it feels so good.” you hear him mumble to himself. you watch him unzip his pants, pulling them down to his ankles and squeezing and palming himself through his underwear. you see his cock grow hard and throb. something stirs inside of you and before you know it; you're down on your knees in front of a hazy and horny looking jisung.

“oh. hey doll, didn't see you th–” he swallows thickly as he watches you reach up and pull his underwear down. “... h-hey babe. you don't have to do that. im fin–fuck!”

his cock has sprung free from its restraints. you look up at him with doe eyes as you rub his shaft slowly. he bites his bottom lip gently before grabbing the base of his penis and tapping it against your lips.

“open.” you part your lips slowly as you maintain your gaze on him. you lean down and gently suck on his tip, giving it long and slow licks.

“that’s it. fuck that feels good, darling. you're so good for me, mhm.” you give him a simple hum as you stroke his shaft from the base. “think you can take a little more of me, darling?”

your eyes flutter close as you lower your head further down. the corner of your lips stretch a little and burn. saliva gathers in your mouth as you feel stuffed. you slowly bob your head up and down, body shivering as you listen to jisung pant and whimper.

“that's it. such a pretty little slut. gosh, you feel so good around my cock.” you continue to suck and stroke him, free hand reaching up and cupping his balls. his hands caress your hair slowly and gently, giving it the occasional tug.

“hollow out your cheeks darling. that’s it.. make sure your tongue is flat and breath darling.” you do as instructed, listening to jisung giving you hints and tips on how he likes it. he praises you, forever telling you how well behaved you're being and how good he feels.

“my little slut looks so pretty with my cock between their lips.”

𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐒 | @reboggingfun ; @fairylouist ; @poody1608 ; @maximumkillshot ; @bintific ; @fun-fanfics ; @septicrebel

[leynaeithnea]

Wow your post is really so good and also really really perfect so I'll try to not really add much to it and just sit here in awe of you jaksjsnnsns

Eurylochus begging to be gaslighted aaah and being the voice of the crew and Ody not wanting to fight him and Ody always being smarter than all of their opponents and bargaining even with Gods to protect his men but not anymoree aaaakdkksnsnsnsnsn

Also I agree , the big ass sword does look awkward and out of place but it also looks really cool so I understand Jorge's choice a little bit lol

(btw you worded everything so well !!!! )

"Don't make me fight you"=I don't want your blood on my hands SOMEBODY SEDATE ME THE ANGST IS TOO MUCH

( I have nothing to say for a good while here bc I was just soaking up your pretty pretty words and got distracted and didn't take any notes lol)

Eury being suicidal "we're never gonna make it home alive " I AGREE SO MUCH bc he never says " nah man don't worry there will be no consequences these cows are chill" he says " meh, we're desperate with nowhere to go, might as well eat and get killed for it " like HE KNOWS WHAT WILL HAPPEN BUT HE'S SO DEFEATED KAKSKSMNS

Ody's like "this is the home of the sun god DON'T FORGET HOW DANGEROUS THE GODS ARE" but EURY ISN'T LISTENING KAKSKS AAAAH

We need a therapy saga FR

RECONSIDER HURTS SO BAD

The pause before Ody says home being bc he is taking a breath 'cause his wounds hurt I LOVE YOUR BRAIN SO MUCH YOU'RE SO AKSKSKKSJSJNAN

"people die like this"= trusting you, EXCUSE ME MISS YOU DID NOT HAVE TO GO THAT HARD I was gonna interpret that as " we die from the constant dangers and the monsters and Gods while the hope of returning home gets fainter and fainter and I'm tired of it " BUT THEN YOU HAD TO GO AND MAKE IT "we are trusting YOU and still getting our ass handed to us by all these monsters while we were SO SURE YOU COULD PROTECT US CAPTAIN, WHERE'S YOUR GUILE NOW SIR??"

Never stopped to think about Ody saying"we pissed him off", oh gods they're still in this together no matter what mwksksksksk AAAH

The full speed ahead thing being so sad bc it's useless jsjskksjs my poor Greek idiots trying to outrun the literal sky kamsnsnsn

I really wanted to make this much much shorter I don't know what possessed me lol ( might have been your writing girl, I loved this one so much I might frame it just you wait )

( Uhm girl don't worry??? This was majestically written?? Also spelling and punctuation is temporary Epic the musical is forever )

I'll try to not really add much to it

Im glad you did not follow through with this ssisegijsegijesg 25. Thunder Bringer

Thunder, war cry like chanting, a storm is brewing

The ENTRANCE the entrance of a god, the one true divine, the king of the gods…..The thunder bringer

Zeus is so fucking SMUG its HOT

the pause before Zeus starts singing, he doesnt even directly address or acknowledge Ody or the crew

"Pride is a damsel in distress, hiding away where only I can undress her, try as she might not to confess, in the end its all the same once i apply all the pre-ssure" ZEUS ZEUS YOU MFUCKER ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT SEXUALLY HARRASSIng PRIDE??? PRIDE??? REALLY??? ….yes yes you do and fuck thats the best musical characterization of Zeus imaginable, Jorge is such a fucking GENIUS I LOVE IT AT THe SAME TIME THIS??? PRIDE??? this pride is talking about Odysseus pride, his hubris, its talking about him trying to hide his pride, where only Zeus, the king of the gods can reveal Odysseus true nature "once he applies all the pressure"

The music is so good

"Thunder, bring her through the wringer, show her Im the judgement call the one who her kingdom fall Lightning, wield her, use and yield her, show her what she cant conceal for true nature will be revealed" THESE LYRICS "Thunder bring her" "Thunderbringer" "Lighting wield her" "lighting wielder" AAAAHHSUEHGSEUGse also yes, we continue to sexually harass Odysseus pride, because this a greek epic and this is Zeus, also "her kingdom" is Odysseus prides "kingdom" his hopes of making it home to Ithica with his crew? or the crews believe into Odysseus? mhhh

"Tell me Odysseus" ah yes he finally acknowledges Odysseus existance, also HE ACKLOWLEDGES HIS eXISTANCE Odysseus, king of ithica, the myth, the walking legend, even the gods know his name, for his whole crew to see (lets ignore poseidon for a second)

"If i were to make you choose, the lifes of your men and crew or your own" (just hypotethically of course..) "why do I think theyd loose?" because he has heard from Hades that he had a whole solo song in the underworld singing how he was the monster rawr rawr rawr sigjseigjse ahem, and maybe also because he made that choice back in troy when he choose to kill the infant…..odysseus will do anything he has to to get home…..

"Elighen me, King of ithica" smug mfucker i love it, taunting, maybe recalling what he said to polyphemus…just mabye….

"Since hunger was far to great, i wonder whod take the weight of the damned and suffer a gruesome fate" well i KNOW it wasnt you who killed the cattle, but youre their captain its on you to take responsibility for their actions and be the one to get punished so they can get home, they were desperate, theyre innocent, you know that, but someone has to pay…

back to the aweseome chorus "Thunder bringer, here to ring your ears until youre deaf with fear and spear you while your death is near" you must learn to fear and respect the gods. you will learn to fear us, your pride has no chance against me, im the king of the gods "Lighting wielder here to yield your time for you have passed your prime, sublime you for your act of crime" youre good days are behind you, youre old?? time to vaporize you

"Choose"….maybe the question wasnt so hypothetical after all "Choose?" ody….my boy, sounds so scared as he asks that

"Someone's gotta die today and you have got the final say" How dare he sing such beautiful vocals here, damnit Luke

"You, or your crew" CRUEL SO CRUEL

"Please dont make me do this, dont make me do this" THE CALLBACK TO HORSE AND THE INFANT ARG OUCH; HES IN SO MUCH PAIN

"When does a comet become a meteor? when does a candle become a blaze?" THE JUST A MAN CALL BACK OF THE CREW JOINING IN

"I can take the suffering from you" PENELOPE? where is she coming from???? how does that make sense???? is that a hallucination? is that Zeus trying to torture Ody a bit more??? need answers "When does a man become a monster? When does a ripple become a tidal wave? when does the reason become the blame? (let me take the suffering-) when does a man become a monster?" Now. this is the moment where Odysseus becomes truly a monster he willingly chooses HIMSELF over the remaining crew members. His reason (penelope) becomes the blame.

theres silence, and we only hear the thunder and rain

"Captain?" he knows what Ody will do, he had hopes for all of one second, its useless, Odysseus will always be their captain and their captain will choose his own life over that of his crew

"I have to go see her" yeah….

"but we'll die" just…resignation

"I know" Ody breaks, he needs more than one therapy saga, this man is haunted af …he points at his crew, Zeus is SMUG AF AGAIN and elevates into the sky as he gathers the lighting around his hands as the crew stares at odysseus in disbelieve picking up their weapons and going on to attack him, ody closes his eyes in defeat

the delivery of "true nature will be revealed", the grip IS SO GOOD ALSO YES ODYSSEUS TRUE NATURE HAS BEEN REVEALED THERE IS NO DENYING IT

lighting and thunder hits the ship before the men reach odysseus, they die and sink into the ocean, ody is badly wounded and sinking into the ocean, he reaches a hand out to the surface, towards penelope and telemachus, telemachus lullaby plays, his consciousness fades, there is no way he will get home now...right?

[youremyheaven]

August Pick A Card Psychic Reading 🦋🦢

Hello lovelies 💛Venus is in retrograde at the moment and I feel like the energy has been shifting in interesting directions for many of us. Today's PAC will be focused on where this will take you in the month of August💛 To continue, pick an emoji 👀

1. 🐯

2. 🦀

3. 🐼

4. 🦚

PILE 1 🐯

congratulations! you have been waiting to receive this news for a long time it seems and well? here it is! life may have been seeming like an endless wait but good news is here. you should approach this new opportunity with preparation. life rewards those who are prepared. you need not worry too much because this is something you're definitely capable of doing, however, it may not come easy at first. hang in there, it WILL get better. there's no need to fret. think of this experience as a preparation for bigger blessings. be kind to yourself. be open to receiving help. don't push people away. you can do this but you need others to guide you along the way. success is not created in isolation.

PILE 2 🦀

im sorry for what you've gone through. times have been tough for you and im so sorry that you were treated that way. you're probably experiencing a bout of low self esteem and that's okay. we all have our moments, but please this is not forever! this is a passing moment and please don't lose perspective of the fact that this is not how you will feel forever. feelings are temporary. this is fleeting. even if you feel like you're at fault, don't dwell on feelings of self-blame. you may have made a mistake but we're all human and we all make mistakes. ITS OKAY, it may feel terrible right now but this is not what defines you as a person. please go easy on yourself.

PILE 3 🐼

oh lordy lord, you are a hustler, aren't you? you need to find time to sit down and RELAX. you've been working yourself to the bone and if you keep going, you will burn out pretty bad. you've been giving too much of your power away. you may be the boss babe at work but in your personal life, you're kind of a doormat. stop letting people walk all over you!!! block those people and just move on, honestly. your desperation makes others look down on you. don't let people see you like this. where is your pride? keep your chin up and know you're better than however you're letting the people in your life treat you. its okay to be the bad guy. be the villain if you have to but please choose yourself. if someone wants you they will make an effort to keep you in their life. but they're doing none of that, so MOVE ON.

PILE 4 🦚

baby 🥺why are you doing this to yourself? you know deep down what the truth of the situation is and you also know what you need to do but you so desperately want to be deluded, so you're letting yourself be blinded by this illusion and its hurting you soooo bad 😩please dont do this. you need to have the courage to face the music and accept things as they are. you can keep lying to yourself but it didn't help then and it won't help you now. you can keep pretending everything is sunshine and rainbows but sooner rather than later, the bandaid will be ripped off and you will feel the sting and honestly half the pain, you've caused yourself. pick yourself up. have the dignity to hold yourself accountable. you know the right thing to do and its not this.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

I hope this reading resonated💛DM me for paid readings💛

[heeseung-min]

[10:03]

"We got another case."

You looked to the older man bringing a file that contains some pictures and reports taken from the crime scene.

"Another one? Urgh, we don't even get to finish the latest two cases."

Jisung, the new kid groaning and knocked his head on the desk. Five months ago when he got transfered here, you can see his bright spirit but now it started to fade. You understood him. Three murder cases in a week. Your team has tried really hard finding solution but failed.

You took the case and analysed every pictures taken by the forensic team. It was an old man. Probably in his late 50s. His skull was broken and you can tell the damage was really bad when the brain looked like minced meat and few cuts on his body. The victim also lost their eyes. Looks like the eyes got pulled out by some force. Jisung beside you gagged after saw the pictures. You patted his back and told him to drink some water and eat.

"Whoever did this, they are literally a psycho. They also took off the victim's clothes and hang it like a flag. Crazy bastard."

Your leader complained. He looked like he wanted to give up on the case. The murder cases keep increasing and the killer is still in the town. Not only that, the residents also critized polices, accusing them for not doing the job properly.

"You should get rest too, Y/n. You and Jisung didn't get enough rest nowadays. That poor boy probably went to sleep already."

"I will, Mr. Kim. Please take a rest too. Your wife must be worried."

You bid him and Jisung goodbye. Everyone is stress from the work. You bought some pastries and coffee before come back to home.

"You are back, honey? Take a shower and have breakfast with me?"

It's your husband, Jay. He took a glance at you then focusing back on his cooking. You are very grateful having him. He really loves you. The way he takes care of you is different with other people in the world. You did as what he said. Take your time in the bathroom for 20 minutes and went to the dining table with him sitting across from you.

"Is the work difficult?" He concernedly asked when he saw how tired you look. You nodded your head slowly and started to eat the meal.

"Mrs.Min told me her husband hasn't come back home for a week. But then, the new case that came in today is about her husband. The team found the body in the woods."

You looked at him warily. Waiting for his reaction. He did nothing except chewing on his food. When he finally swallowed it, he turned to you.

"The eyes are gone right? And the brain was smashed."

"I...I didn't say about his condition."

He laughed. Your instict is right.

"Oops! You caught me."

He continued back eating his food like nothing happen. Your hands shaking a bit because of nervous.

"You did it again...."

"I had too, darling."

"What is the reason for this time?"

You had thought he finally stopped doing it. But when you see the cuts on the victim's body. You quickly remember the same pattern Jay did to someone else. Yes, your husband is the killer for the new case you got this morning.

"Oh, darling. It's too much. He is too much. The way his eyes lingering on you too long, the way he sometimes make his finger accidentally touches yours when you give something for his family, the way he sometimes tried to touch your body. I could list more but that just few of it. I really wish I can do more to his body. I made him watch his own dick got stepped by me. Sick old fuck."

It's scary. Jay is scary.

But, do you hate it?

No. Never. You love him despite all the bad things he had done.

"Thank you."

"I did everything for you, my love. I hate when people overstep their boundaries."

"I know. Thank you for protecting me."

And that's why the case will turn to a cold one. It will remain unsolve forever.

---

---

Ayo, that looks creepy and scary💀🤚Im sorry if that makes you uncomfortable...i didnt expected i wrote that. But, hopefully you guys enjoy it.

Taglist: @stacey-stonem @duolingofanaccount

[stuck-in-the-ghost-zone]

OKAY. OKAY. WINTERS FAMILY TORMENT NEXUS. as i've said before this is all REALLY vague rough outlines bc i wanted to bounce it all back n forth with u. but. what i have:

>winters family (mark & ashe & fridged mom/wife) live in a location hit by the simurgh

>mark is at work when she arrives. something horrific happens at home. maybe his wife is injured or hurt, but not killed. ashe (7/8/9) triggers. whatever his powers are, they. do Not help heal his mom. in fact the opposite.

>mark tears back home asap instead of leaving as soon as he hears her song, actively choosing to stay in her effect zone for his family. finds newly triggered baby ashe & the rest of that scene.

>theyve spent too long in the affected zone to be allowed to go free, especially since ashe triggered from it. mark nukes his whole past life & ashe's to escape without undergoing all the protocols. he spends ages doing shit work to support him & ashe bc theyre both legally dead, ends up working for overlord, manages to get enough of a fake past to get through cauldron background checks & get powers? it'll pay so much better than the grunt work he's doing now & he has to support ashe (powered)(legally dead)(would probably be executed if anyone Found Out)....

anyway to me the trickster is like. the endgame of this specific simurgh rube goldberg. somehow it doesn't end horrifically, for once! but it gets. bad. the fact that they're simurgh survivors is always looming over their heads. its why mark fucking freaks out when ashe joins the wards. literally have nothing more specific than this though u gotta help me put meat on these bones!!!!! STOP "being responsible" and "doing work" and stuff START thinking incessantly abt nhw ashe!!!!! i don't even know his powers bc i have no clue how he triggered!!!! augh. god. them..... mods torture that blonde man in the most narratively satisfying and fucked up way possible!!!!

QUIT YOUR JOB JOIN MY EMO WARDS !!!!!!!!!!!!! god dude god dude I'm gonna be thinking about this all fucking DAY . who needs to be responsible and have a job. not me!!!! FUCK !!!!!!!! dude im just. thinking abt mark being at work getting the notice to evacuate and starting to hear the song and. bc it's important to me that he's a little bit of a coward. it takes him longer than he will ever admit to decide to go back to his family. he definitely hesitates and hates himself for it because. what if he had gotten there 10 minutes earlier! who fucking knows! he never will!!

god man I'm just thinking about. that scene where they're in the hospital waiting to hear back about noelle and the person (ai?) at the desk is giving them the rundown of all the containment procedures and handing them paperwork and asking them if they can pay for the medical care. how fucked up would that be to hear after you're in the midst of losing everything. mark winters the universes most hated man. I looooooove the satisfaction in thinking about that snap decision where he goes from "relatively normal if a little emotionally repressed but otherwise does his best suburban dad" to "my wife is dead and my son is fucked up and there's this fucking sound in my head that won't go away I'm about to erase everything and break several laws in order to get us out of here" and how that eventually leads into. supervillain. it's just soooooooo. sickos haha yessss the downfall of this fucking miserable blonde guy. when do you think he consciously made that choice. he heard "you're never going to get out of here and live a normal life again" do you think he just . sat with that for a while. ashe unresponsive either due to shock or fear or the trauma of triggering/whatever his powers are and mark just has to sit there. by himself. like what the fuck am I gonna do now. auaghghghghhhh I need 2 make him so miserable forever. fuck that guy i hate his ass (<< me when I lie)

I THINK . I NEED TO SIT FOR A WHILE AND FINISH THESE NEXT COUPLE CHAPTERS AND PROCESS A LITTLE MORE BEFORE I MAKE A SOLID DECISION ON ASHES POWERS. but you knowwwww it's gonna be some fucked up horror shit. it has to be. it has to be something fucked up enough that mark forbids him from using his powers and keeps him . at home isolated for his own good. but not TOO fucked that he wouldn't be able to join the wards.

actually speaking of. HOW THE FUCK DOES HE JOIN THE WARDS. I know mark basically fucking erased their whole identity and everything but. there's noooo way the prt would let this kid join them. right?????? right????. how the hell would that even be a possibility with all the precautions in place for simurgh survivors. THEY EXPLODED THAT ONE CAPE GUYS HEAD BECAUSE HE STAYED IN PROXIMITY FOR A LITTLE BIT TOO LONG. maybe it's unofficial. maybe he never Officially joins them but he sneaks out while mark is gone and meets the boys somewhere and they become friends out of costume first. and then they learn about his powers and ashe is like "I can help!" and helps them like. as a rogue or something. but hes never registered as an official cape. is this anything. im thinking about him so much what the fuuuuuck have we done. what have we done !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[pandorasfavorite]

Self Pity Pt2.

Summary: you are recovering from many days of abandonment, Neteyam apologizes. Angsty, hurt/comfort. THIS TOOK ME TOO DAMN LONG IM SORRY.

Notes: this took me forever because I wanted the ending to be perfect and good writing not mid. Also I almost started to sob writing this.

Neteyam didn't cry, not in front of his family and most importantly not in front of his father. But that's the thing about you, you tend to change things frequently. Neteyam spilled everything to his father getting worked up again just by talking about what he did to you. It's hard for him to breathe, just knowing that you are sitting in the healer's tent because he could not provide for you like a proper mate physically pains him. The overwhelming urge to come to your aid prods at his legs making him step instinctively towards the exit as he's speaking. Jake notices this resonating with his son, and he grabs Neteyam by the shoulders grounding him. "Son, do you love her", Neteyam was convinced this was the most foolish question his father has ever asked him. "Of course" he blurts out a new wave of tears brimming in his eyes because he knows he's not worthy enough to even say that. Jake pushes Neteyam towards the exit of their home, navigating him towards the hut where you are resting.

Neteyam snaps his head up toward his father with uncertainty, "Go make things right". Neteyam can only muster up a small "yes sir" before pushing the flap to the hut to the side. A whimper slipped past his lips seeing your beautiful face pale and covered with a sheen of sweat. Mo'at grunts at his presence flashing a glare toward her grandson at what he allowed to happen. Neteyam sits beside your resting figure not daring to turn away from you for a minute. You have been asleep for over 15 hours now and Mo'at instructs Neteyam to wake you up while she gathers more herbs. Neteyam can't bring himself to respond to his grandmother instead he rubs his thumb across his lover's cheekbone beginning the process of waking her up. You begin to wake feeling someone touch your face, your eyelids flutter rhythmically hearing a familiar voice speak out to you. "Come on, baby. It's time to wake up," Neteyam says letting the pet name slip past his lips for the first time in weeks.

You start to sit up only to be pushed back against the hammock while being spoken to, "No don't move honey". Your eyebrows furrow as you start to gather all your senses again, this voice belonged to someone you did not want to see. You don't spare him your normal loving smile or soft-spoken words to him. "Why are you here Neteyam", his ears lay back a little at the harsh words but he nods agreeing that he deserved that tone. "I was scared. What mighty warrior is scared to love such a beautiful woman?" his voice cracks for what seems like the 10th time. Your ears pin back similar to Neteyams hearing him talk bad about himself, even through anger his pain is your pain. "I was scared to love you, I am an adult yet I was still scared of my father's disapproval. My foolishness made me lose the person I held closest to my heart... you".

Your feeble hand clasps over your mouth finally hearing the words you longed for. This was a declaration of Neteyam's love for you in every form imaginable. A tear rolls down your cheek and you shut your eyes tightly as sobs begin to take over your body. Neteyam hovers over your hands on both sides of your face where they used to lay every day. "Y/n I can't live this life without you. Oel ngati kameie". You would've bared this pain a million times over again just to hear those three words slip past his lips once more. Your hands fall on top of his tears running down your cheeks quickly faster than they ever have before. "Oel ngati kameie ma Neteyam," you say opening your eyes to see his expression brighten much like it did the day you accepted his courting advances. Seeing his bright smile beckoned more hiccups of tears out of you, Neteyam leans in more speaking comfort like he should've before, "it's alright, I'm here now". You nod closing your eyes for a moment and taking a much-needed inhale of air. Another moment passes by and a cough sounds through the hut signaling someone's presence, you were convinced Neteyam would detach himself immediately but he stayed glued to you. As if he could read your thought Neteyam reassures you, "I'll never turn away from you again".

Note: I seen these people ask about part 2 so here yall are. @nyotamalfoy @leeblackworld-blogg

[kolour-me-kourt]

Chapter Eight: Loose End

"Hey I'm not even trying to be funny I am happy for you and you didn't owe me anything but I thought you wasn't ready for a relationship? Now you're out with Jayson Tatum? That's wild to me like I said you don't owe me anything but you didn't have to lie I'm a cool ass nigga"

Lorenzo's message sent shivers down her spine the only thing that she hadn't thought about in this world wind romance with Jayson.... Was Lorenzo. She decided to text him asking him to come over so they could talk and he'll be here in five minutes. She contemplated telling him everything because Lorenzo seemed like he could handle it.

But she didn't want to tell him and then he tell the world about Lamelo or she didn't wanna tell him and he really see how fucked up she was. Cause she's done some fucked up shit to him and those could be memories she messes up forever just by telling the truth. Meeting one of your favorite basketball players.... But the girl you're pursing is fucking him..... going out to dinner with him and his girlfriend and your potential boo is arguing with him in the bathroom several things could go wrong. She heard her doorbell go off so she invited him in.

"Heyy" "hey ma how you been?" He hugged her tight "we're gonna get into that... you wanna sit down?" she could tell Lorenzo had revenge on his mind he smelled of expensive cologne he had on a nice outfit and a fresh ass haircut with his beard trimmed but still looking .... Edible.

"Yeah In the living room?" "Mhm... you want a water or anything?" "Yeah a bottle will be nice" "okay go get comfortable I'll grab you one" "thank you" she grabbed him a water bottle and then hands it to him sitting down right beside him with her leg in the chair. "Um how have you been first" "I'm good you know working staying busy" "oh that's really good" "yeah but we here to talk about you" they share a laugh

"Sooo thank you for coming I hope you really hear me out" "look I was out of it when I sent that message I saw the pictures everywhere and was just confused and hurt all at the same time so you don't have to apologize" she placed her hand on his chest "I do though the whole thing was fucked up Lorenz and I mean that so from the bottom of my heart I am sorry but no I didn't lie to you everything I said was truthful I can't get into details but yeah I was seeing someone when Trin hooked us up and the second date was genuine I did wanna try and date you cause you seemed so good but I just didn't feel right completely and you didn't either cause you saw the truth I was dealing with someone else who had my mind so when you broke it off I was relieved but all this shit that just happened I didn't expect it at all so I was glad you texted so I can tell you I'm sorry"

She found herself teary eyed he stands up opening and closing his hand signaling for her to stand up "give me a hug" she smiled standing up hugging him "I accept your apology we can even be friends.... If you want to um it's no bad blood" "you promise?" "Yeahhh I was dating too when I met you but I did like you Fr but like I said I wasn't mad you was seeing somebody Im mad cause I thought you were lying" "oh okay then yeah ... we're friends" he laughed

"alright Um thanks for clearing everything up I hope you're relationship is your last one and it's happy" "same for you You're a good man and somebody will appreciate that" "shittt she better or I'll start hoeing" he joked but she could tell he was low key serious. "Nah don't do that she might be right around the corner" "hopefully ... but let me get out of here thanks for reaching out" "yeah thanks for coming" she walked him to the door hugging him again and then he left" she shut and locked her door exhaling.

She had only been home for three minutes before he texted her she needed to do laundry and unpack get herself together cause she had work in the morning. She finally got her laundry in the washing machine and took a shower she checks her phone and she missed a call from Jayson.

She calls him back and he answered pretty soon. "Hey were you sleep?" "No in the shower" "oh okay" she laughed "you asking for a reason?" "I just miss you my mom has deuce for a few hours .... I just wish we were closer to each other" "yeah I really had to work tomorrow from the office" "no I get you completely... I was just saying I miss you" "I miss you too" "what you been doing?" "just cleaning all my stuff from being out there and getting ready for work tomorrow so it can be a good day ... you know?"

"Yes I definitely know it'll be a great day I know a lot has changed and little blogs have been posting you ... I didn't even think they would do that or I would've taken you somewhere else for our first date" "I loved our first date I wouldn't change it for the world" he smiles again "I loved it too .... You in that pink dress .... Damn" she laughed "baby pleaseeee" "I

Just saying we had all that fun I even beat yo ass in bowling" "first of all you only one but that one strike" "One strike you didn't have but anyway you had me already but if you didn't that pink dress would've did it"

"ughhh I can't wait to see you again I've only been gone for a few hours" "I know crazy how that happened huh?" "You gotta come see me next time" "you gon show me around your city?" "Of courseee" "yeah show me where all your ex Niggas stay so I know where the opps at" they shared a laugh she rolled her yes "okay baby clearly your sleepy" "yeah I am but I wanna to talk to you so here I am until Deuce get back" "Deuce has a better social life than me out partying on a Thursday" "speaking of that you told your friends or anything yet?" She sighed

"no I definitely wanted too before the blogs picked up Fr but ... idk you know they're calling me the mystery woman" "yeah I saw that ... it's interesting" "that's one word to call it" "well you can tell them..... we not a secret remember?" "Yes and I will tell them I just don't know if that's a text message" "did they know about Melo?" "Only people who knew about Melo is me him and you well Asia knew too" "what made you trust me?" "You're my man and you've shown that you wouldn't do that so..." "you right bae you get the real me at all times" "mmm so when am I gonna see you?"

"I don't know I gotta work all this shit out I have a couple meetings and Deuces schedule you know ... but I'll figure it all out and then be straight to you... I promise" "that's so sweet Bae" "I know I'm the man" "what's your plans for tomorrow?" "Getting a hair cut and practice " "mmm you gonna cut your curls?" "Yeah maybe I haven't decided Fr.... what? you like me better with them?" What's your famous quote? You top five regardless so it doesn't matter" she smiled "I better be your top one no other Niggas before" "yes sir of course not" she laughed

"What's your plans for tomorrow?" "Find a bookcase and some books" "easy to build?" "Yes definitely something I can just slide this in this and boom I have a book case" he laughed "what books do you like?" "Well I kinda wanna fill it up with books I already read and then like series so all the Harry Potter books all of twilight shit maybe even goosebumps stuff like that it's my nostalgic book case" "oh okay I got you that'll be fun"

"yeah If I don't do it right after work tomorrow then I'll probably just wait until Saturday morning when I have more time" "I think you should wait Bae you don't wanna rush your purchases" "you know what you right" "I know I am"

she heard his front door open "well okay Bae  goodnight I'll talk to you tomorrow" "goodnight text me when you get up" "okay I will" she hears Deuce calling for him "byee" "bye YN" she hangs up

*the next day after work*

She calls her closest friends Asia Trin and Maya In a group face time.

"What y'all up to? Y'all wanna come over here?" "You inviting us to your house what you do? Is it a body we need to cover up? Hold up don't answer that on the phone" maya began rambling YN laughed "shutup girl" trin says laughing harder "no I just wanted to tell y'all something but like it can be over the phone too I guess "alright yeah just tell us" "I'm have a boyfriend ...." "Oh shit?" "Yeah Um Jayson Tatum NBA player plays for Celtics"

"the one with all the tattoos?" "Wait the one with the kid?" "Yesss that's him" "well we're happy for you but he is a nba player take it slow" "yeah he's really good though like he's not like the other ones I really feel like he's different and wouldn't treat me wrong.... But yeah that's all I wanted to tell y'all" "welllllll like she said we happy for you have fun you deserve this"

The conversation goes on taking many turns talking about a lot of different things when YN hears her doorbell. "Oh shit who at my door?" "Go see take the phone" YN walks to the door and sees a package "oh nobody it's just a package" "you were expecting one?" "Not at all" she opens her door and it's a long big box and a few more boxes "yall it's like five boxes out here" "oh shit call us later then get your stuff in" "okay byeee love y'all" YN hangs up pushing the largest box in first and then going to pick up the smaller boxes but they were heavy too. While she was outside she though she might as well check her mail too. She found a hand written note from Jayson making her smile

Since you're all about nostalgia I found every series you said and through some funny ones in there and I got you a book case bae... enjoy it

He listens to her it's really the little things likeeee a five second conversation turned into him getting her what she wanted. She calls him immediately smiling ear to ear. "You got my book case and some books... thank you baby" "uh huh it was nothing I started looking for the stuff while you were talking I hope you enjoy it baby" "I definitely will" "okay Bae I'm going into practice but I'll call you when I'm back home" "okay byeee Jay" "bye Bae"

She loved it here everything was coming together finally. Lamelo was out of her life sexually meaning she didn't have to deal with all of that nonsense. Lorenzo wasn't mad at her. She had a new boyfriend who was great and her friends knew about him everything was great. Are her loose ends were tied up

[krash-8]

i read a few pages forward and I dont live here forever. ive decided a love poem is when I look out the window on purpose.

i defend you all and for what? for what? ive never been good at sit and take it, but fight back standing came pretty naturally. battle ground where? here, of course.

i am happy hanging posters in my bedroom with sticky tack. i am home when i look down at the floor and where my feet are on it, and dont feel like somethings missing. i havent really felt home so strong since i had a sleepover with my best friend. we watched cartoons on and off and made tea at midnight and ate pancakes in the morning and overall felt like i should have been there before. and after. and longer. then i went back to my house and didn't feel like I did. radio hurts. radio always on. radio all I hear when shouting burns out quick to dead quiet. radio reminds me even when I'm far. I never really am, though. one long breath out would do me good, where I let my shoulders sink and I don't feel like I'm wrapping my arms tight around everything I own, where "I can't wait" isn't spoken out of desperation, where I loosen my grip, where I breathe back in a little lighter and realize it's not the breath but where im standing. home, I guess. truck stop. back seat. stuffy old place. I hang posters on the wall with sticky tack. ive decided a love poem is when I look out the window on purpose even though theres nothing bad happening inside. and when I look in the window even though I don't have to get in there to escape. and when I look down at my feet just to see my shoes, and when i stare at my decorated walls and think, 'this is good for me,' and I really mean it.

[symphonic-scream]

alright i got one and im p sure its been done A LOT but; chariot!makoto and priestess!ryuji?

Okay okay okay. Okay!!

So Chariot Makoto is easy for me, she's in my Chaos Swap, so I'll lay that out here

Chariot!Makoto

She's always been too smart for her own good, unable to back down, stubborn as a brick wall. Sae is, everything, impossible to live up to. At some point, Makoto. Stops trying. She can't stay in her sister's shadow forever, you know? So, the best way to distance herself from Sae is, heavy rebellion

Leather jacket over her shujin uniform. Piercings all over- nose, eyebrow, lots in the ears- undercut with her hair, wears the pants with the uniform, big heavy boots. Skips classes yet, does as well as a smart kid can naturally. So, no one ever tries to stop her. No one intervenes when she becomes so distanced she just. Sits on the roof all day, staring up at nothing

She gets her fire back. Getting back at Kamoshida for breaking her left wrist in her first year, and for all he's done to the girls at Shujin. Her confidante is about finding out who Makoto truly is. Helping her find her path. A future. An identity.

She's an angry crier. An emotionally stunted mess. So bad at social interaction. And, most of all, unable to back down, stubborn as fuck, and does dangerous shit before she even thinks of the consequences

(I of course did pair her with Lovers!Haru cause. I'm weak for those two together)

Priestess!Ryuji

Oooh okay okay. This one is one I've considered, like, the least? It's not where I usually shove Ryuji

He'd be, like. On the student council, the rep for athletic clubs. He got injured and can't compete himself, so. He supports them however he can

However, they keep slashing the athletics budgets for teams that aren't volleyball, and Ryuji ends up having to tell the other teams they lose their funding. He's become sorta the Grim Reaper

He hates it, so bad. He tries to fight it, but, they don't listen to him. He's just the dumb jock to them, and, he loses that spark. Silently goes by each day, isolated and called the Athletics Reaper. All his old friends? They hate him

But, he hears of these Phantom Thieves. Thinks he might be able to get them to, help him out. Get them to stop the greedy Kamoshida from taking all the funds and shit. He doesn't think, threatens them, but gets to work with them to help

Priestess Ryuji wanted to help. He loved getting to support the athletes in any way he could, making sure they all had what they needed to succeed. His confidante would be helping him repair his relationships with his former team. Then, watching Ryuji blossom again. He even speaks up at a council meeting, fighting for a more fair budget

THERE YOU GO LET ME KNOW HOW YA LIKE EM

[sipsteainanxiety]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love ❤

i was tagged by @coopigeoncoo @andypantsx3 @willowser and @namodawrites to do this lil self fic rec game and after finally sitting down to think about it for a very... long... time... i have done it! thank you all for the tag i kiss you each on the forehead and give you a bowl of sliced fruit<3

after looking at all the wips i have in docs right now, i can definitely say that this list would be completely different if i had finished a few of them, but for now this is my ranked list for things i've published already lol

devil's glare — demon!bkg x reader

bakugou katsuki is a powerful demon that you have the pleasure of dating. but when he pisses you off one day, you decide to get back at him in a pretty petty way: drawing a salt circle around you to force him to apologize 

i had THEE most fun writing this one shot LMAO. it was based on a tiktok of all things that i'd found back when i was still on the app pfft. i just loved the idea of bkg being all surly and aggravated that his little human had purposely drawn a salt circle to prevent him from encroaching on their space. and like... him dealing with wanting to idk kiss you so bad but you're trying to teach him a lesson and he's sooooo mad and fuck, he's gonna do whatever he can to get you to comply to him lmao. if i could draw, there's this one scene where you're wearing this like. cute little set of pjs staring up at this big ass demon, wings unfurled threateningly, snarl on his face, arms crossed with a line of salt in between the two of you. like i have a vision. too bad i can't draw it LMFAOO. maybe one day

2. holding out (just for you) — dragon!bkg x reader

in which you find a horrendously injured dragon in a cave and make it your duty to heal him, not knowing that he’s the infamous dragonshifter, bakugo katsuki, who has been cursed to remain trapped in his dragon form forever—unless the spell is broken

this fic... oh boy. i've been working on this fic since mmm 2021 i think? i can't believe it's been a year since the big bang LMFAOO. i also can't blv this shit evolved from being a standalone to having 3 spinoffs and a sequel but well. here we are. complaints aside i really do have fun writing this fic!! i dunno!! i dont think i'd ever read a dragon bkg fic before and i was like fine i'll do it myself and this happened. i added way too much plot and you guys don't even know about half the worldbuilding and shit i have planned for the sequel HAHA. i can't even talk about it bc it would be major spoilers rn rhrsfjhrjfrjrhjg. it's also been giving me such a rough time lately pfft, especially with having to make sure everything lines up for the spinoffs n stuff. im so afraid of publishing ch4 and having to go back and tweak things bc i havent planned out far enough sdkjfsjkdf. i think it just means i'm gonna have to go on a hiatus or smthn and write out all the spinoffs + ch4 at once idk

3. and i give my all (to you) — merman!bkg x reader

you think you bit off more than you could chew when you decided to do your dissertation on ocean acidification, leaving you stranded out in the open ocean. alone. for months. well… maybe you weren’t so alone after all

this is another fic that i've been working on way longer than it's been posted for pfft. i can't blv the first chapter was released over a year ago LMAOOO i am so sorry. i do like this fic tho bc it's one of the easier ones to write and i go back to it sometimes between writing for dragon bkg lol. like i have the chapters all mapped out, all i have to do is sit down and write em. ch2's at abt 3k rn tho and i hit a spot where i'm like oof i dont wanna write these descriptions dfhdkfg it's just a silly goofy story with merbaku and dealing with some of the subtle intricacies of getting to know a mermaid. actually, fun fact, this originally started off as a fic for jotaro from jjba, back when i was in my jjba era. but then i went back to my bkg era and switched it over. i didn't even have to change much LMFAOO jotaro and bkg act the same sometimes. also!! this is the first fic where i'm like... drawing little doodles for each chapter!! and it's so nice but also i'm like damn wtf do i draw for the rest of these chapters.... i'll figure it out ig

4. loving all the parts of you — pro hero!bkg x reader

in which you learn to love all the prickly parts that make up bakugou katsuki

i.. don't think i've thought about this fic for a very, very long time. but i just scrolled thru the masterlist and stuff and i... really liked writing it (when i was focused on it anyways). it's one of my gentler fics tbh. it's more of a character study of bkg, exploring a different aspect of him in each chapter. tbh i need to go through and reread it and make edits so it can better match the writing style i have now, but i rly liked thinking abt what would make bkg tick as a pro and as a person. and tbh, with what i know now of the manga and anime i think i could go very deep with it pfft. also the banner i made for this fic is so cute LOL. it's not high on my priority list rn bc i have other things i wanna work on, but i do hope to return to it one day.

5. forget me not — pro hero!bkg x reader

When you first woke up, you found yourself in a white room, lights blinding you from all directions. A bit disoriented, you squinted and looked around, realizing you were chained to a chair, your arms locked behind you. In front of you was a poster of a man, muscles rippling throughout his body, a spiky mess of ash blond hair nestled on his head, and striking crimson eyes glaring right at you from behind a black mask. In the upper right corner was the name “DYNAMIGHT” in black and orange letters. As you observed the poster, the sound of a P.A. system suddenly rang into existence, the deep, hoarse voice of an unknown person echoing around you. “Your name is [Name] [Surname],” the voice said without emotion, “and you hate the man named Bakugou Katsuki.”

THIS FIC... THIS FCKIN FIC. i have so much i can say about this fic and i am so sorry for the oncoming ramble pfft. firstly, it's both my baby and my number one fucking enemy. like, holy shit i think it gave me the most paralyzing anxiety and bc of this it took me like 3-4 years to finish (apart from being generally busy of course). i started it literally while i was in high school n applying to college, so of course there are aspects of it that i look at now and i'm like mmm don't like that. not to mention there have been so many things that happened in the anime/manga that i wasn't able to add or delve deeper into!! like the war!! bkg's fcking trauma!! midoriya's quirks!! i was an anime only when i first started releasing chapters (and i still am), so i didnt know about the endeavor agency arc or anything so i defaulted to shit with best jeanist and idkidk.

if i could rewrite all of fmn, i think i would. or maybe not all, but a good chunk of it. like i'd condense the first few chapters probably. i also have a different grasp of bkg's characterization now compared to when i was younger lmao. putting bkg in that specific circumstance (iykyk, i wont spoil it) only happened bc of certain outside factors that forced him into that position. which was how i was able to justify it. but... idk. IDK!! this fic had so many things to it that i was not knowledgeable about so i winged a lot of things without doing proper research (i.e. hospitals, police investigations, general bureaucracy and whatnot) and i feel like this has caused certain plot holes that i am not able to detect, but like.... it's been so long already that i'm too lazy to fix it.

i just really wanted to write about having amnesia but... still having this muscle memory and ache of the person you were in love with. that you can fall in love with them all over again. but, jeez, i put the reader through so much that there's so much... trauma and brainwashing and just rhhrhjrkhrhgrkjg. she's a mess and a half!! and this makes it so difficult to read fmn bc she's so frustrating!! but! at the same time idk it was interesting exploring that kind of ptsd and recovery. i think at my core i love writing about truly heartwrenching topics and horror. i rmb i had the most fun writing about reader's nightmares or that one chapter where she was messing around with illusions. actually- one of the things i would change is the reader's fckin quirk and hero name LMAOOOOO what the fuck i made her so op i basically just smashed together dr strange's and wanda's powers for her pfft. i'd also tweak her personality a little, i think.

i digress. anyways. im in the process of editing all of fmn (just like. writing tweaks. changing the phrasing of certain sentences. adding more fluff to descriptions) and i can really see how much my style has evolved lol. like, i am the most happy and proud of the later chapters, where you can really feel certain emotions with bkg and reader. like... the beach scene, or the stakeout scene, or the party scene!! i think i would also add more substance to the investigation and how being a hero is like post-war. the antagonists as well!! there's just so much that could've been built on, but at the same time... i didn't want to go too deep into it bc i was writing an amnesia recovery story.

flaming aside, i am very glad i was able to pull those plot twists successfully LOL. i loved reading people's theories back when i was still updating it, seeing them question things and being like wait a minute... no way... it can't be... it was an era i will never forget pfft. but... because of that expectation i think i was very nervous to reveal specific things or even write the ending bc i didn't know if people would be satisfied lol. fmn was so complicated and for what sdfkjhs. fanfic shouldnt make you this anxious fr and yet there i was. i'm glad im done with it, but at the same time.. i do miss it.

tldr: fmn is the fic that i am the most proud of but also the most insecure LMFAOO. i do eventually want to get to the extra chapters from bkg's pov for it but... idk. i don't wanna even look at it right now sdhfskdfjsf

thank u all for coming to my ted talk B) i'm sorry if u've been tagged alr in this but here we go anyways!! no pressure tags: @earthtooz @call-me-ko @thecatduet422 @boo-kugo @theloveinc <3

[mattraeax]

Stitched

Zoro x Reader [1/?]

WC - 1164

Warnings ↔ mentions abuse (work + additional notes), alcohol (work + additional notes), zoro kinda really sucks ass in this, OOC Luffy (? idk he's serious so to me that counts)

Notes ↔ i debated making this third or first pov but I said fuck it and did second bc it irritates my friend so badly AND bc it helps feedback putting yourself in a situation, excuse the shittiness of it im so out of touch w/ writing anything not genuinely disturbing LMFAO; additional notes/vent at the end I REALLY really need some advice 😭

IF YOU SEE THEY/THEIR WHERE YOU/YOUR IS SUPPOSED TO BE NO YOU DON'T 😁

story under "keep reading as to not clog/give you carpal tunnel <3

It was a cool night out in the Alabasta desert and Ace decided to make up games around the campfire to ease tensions about the war. Everyone was sitting around talking and enjoying themselves, occasionally breaking the peace was Ussop yelling at Luffy to "leave the fire to the fire man please" when he started to “cook his food over here so you all won't take it”. 

You were enjoying the chaos, speaking with Nami when they felt a hand on their shoulder. "hey I need to talk to you" Zoro said, practically dragging you behind a pair of boulders some ways away from, the crew. "Why don't you treat me like a priority?" Before you could even look up at the man, he began rapid-firing questions like an interrogation. The two of you had been together for what seemed like forever and he felt you didn't value them. "Why don't you talk to me as much as you talk to Nami or Ace or Ussop? How come you don't ask personal questions about me?" he continued on and on, pouring his heart out. You grabbed Zoro’s hand, leading him to sit on smaller rocks. 

"Zoro are you drunk? What's going on?" you asked, but you already knew. Zoro wasn’t a man of face to face confrontation if it didn’t involve violence unless he was at least buzzed. He knew you were concerned and somewhat appreciated it, but he was upset. He continued to stare, waiting for a response. You looked him in the eyes and squeezed his hands gently. "Zoro. My love, I am sincerely sorry I treat you the way I do to where you don't feel like a priority in my life. As you know I’m sick and am almost always asleep or on the verge of it, and barely have the energy to get out of bed, let alone come to find and spend time with you but that’s no excuse. You are truly the most important person in my life and I'm sorry I'm not making you feel as special to me as I know you are.” You sighed, leaning their elbows on their knees, and spoke as softly as possible to avoid further emotional strain. “I don't ask you questions because you tell me everything before I can even think of what to ask. I told you how I feel about you drinking so much. I know you have a lot going on in your head but I’d rather you just talk to me. I hate it when you drink so much Zoro." 

He squinted, seemingly trying to make sense of your words. “Y/N I get you're tired all the time but that's no excuse. I always still find time for you when I'm busy and I can't figure out why you won't do the same. I’m not saying all of this to make you feel bad but it's been for months now. I feel like I'm a side piece to you. I don't feel like this relationship is working, sometimes it feels like its all one sided because we barely interact. The way you treat me makes me feel abused by you. Emotionally physically and mentally I am being abused by you and your actions I feel like you just don't care.” Zoro continued on and on, repeating everything in different ways. You, however, were stunned. The love of your life has lost his mind. You blinked once, twice, and stood up. “Zoro. Im going to bed. Please keep your distance from me I need to think some things over.” At the mention of space, he stood up and raised his voice just enough to draw the crew's attention. “You will stay here while we finish our conversation Y/N L/N.” 

You turned around in shock at being shouted at, trying to calm yourself before making this any more painful. “Roronoa Zoro, it’s not much of a conversation when all you do is drone on and interrupt me when I answer whatever question you've asked for the nth time in a row. I hate when you don't listen yet demand I change my actions. It’s not my fault you choose to ignore me when I try to speak to you or go to bed not 10 minutes into our alone time everytime. I tell you every time when I don’t feel well enough to hold a regular conversation or when I’m exhausted beyond belief but you’re so dense you think I’m lying. You can’t figure out why I don’t communicate before you only think of yourself Zoro! You do not dictate what I do or when I speak with you. Leave me alone for now Zoro.” Everyone could have sworn the desert had never been quieter. Y/N was high on adrenaline, remembering why you loathe alcohol. In a heartbeat, Zoro was in their face, bent down at eye level. “You need to do better Y/N. I lov- well maybe not that word, that's too strong but I do like you a lot. I want to make this work with you. Get it together.” he gritted through his teeth. That was your last straw. Eerily calm, you backed up, muttered a very soft “okay” and walked back to the temporary base. Everyone looked extremely uncomfortable and sympathetic for them, as they had nosely listened to  overheard everything. You picked up your sleeping bag and a spare piece of wood, walking up to Ace. “Hey I'm sorry to bother you but can you light this? Don't wanna ruin your lovely blaze here.” you weakly chuckled, gesturing to the fire.

 He nodded, trying to make eye contact but failing as they looked away quickly. As they walked away from the group, Luffy approached them, slightly startling you. “Sorry didn't mean to scare you. Are you okay? Do you need anything?” he asked rather seriously, a rare but much-appreciated sight for them. You turned to your captain and the crew. “Please keep your swordsman away from me for a while. I may actually end up killing him if he’s anywhere around me.” Your tone set everyone on edge. Seeing everyone nod and affirm the favor, you slouched, finally relieved to be away from him. Between the flashbacks and the headrush of shouting, you finally felt safe. You felt your body grow weak and hit the sand. Luffy reached out to you but he was waved off. “I’m alright Luffy. Goodnight everyone, I'll be 56 paces this way when yall are ready to get going in the morning.” pointing over your shoulder, diagonal to where your “conversation” with Zoro took place for as much distance as possible. As you walked and set up for the night you couldn’t help but cry, remembering that any and every time alcohol was involved it was a disappointment. You wondered if you were the catalyst for everyone’s drinking habits as you finally got to sleep, absolutely dreading the morning.

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BASED ON A TRUE STORY (◎﹏◎) oh my god my partner (idek what to call him now I ain't spoke to him in bout a week n a half dog) called me drunk and called me all types of manipulative n abusive for not communicating enough (im chronically ill and the heat is NOT helping, he knows this) and called our relationship a situationship so that's always wonderful to hear. every line from zoro is either exactly or summed up what this mf said to me and oh my god I really just don't know what to do, I'm not sure if i wanna make it work or not

close friend said its manipulative as fuck n i need to get out bc every fight we've been in has been bc he forgot I said/told him something and he flipped it to me not communicating, I can see it but FUCK why is leaving so hard

[the-gayest-show]

as i near the end of highschool, i don't even know what i wanna be when i grow up like. i'm thinking about animating but that feels like a tool in my skillset most days than a career. but i love making. i love creating. these are things i wanna do forever. this is a fact.

and yet here i am. im in gr11 but im being essentially forced to pick a career. but i don't.... want one? i mean i gotta want one, but i just wanna sit and make my silly things and have other people enjoy them.

not like a youtuber but just. short film making, TV show making. i want the ideas to reach people, make them cry, laugh, feel things. I want people to make fandom around it. i love fandom as a phenomenon and i guess that's what i really wanna do.

i already love when i create something i think is "ok" and then people go "holy shit that looks awesome" and they start making their own interpretations.

i posted smth on reddit in r/twosentencehorror for funsies. im not a writing person but i cooked smth up bc i'd never posted a 2 sentence story before. the response was actually shocking. ppl were all like "this is smth we rarely see on here" "nice twist!" and they took to their own interpretations and people loved it! I dunno. That felt good, and honestly that's what I meant by having ppl enjoy them.

I wanna be good at everything. Jack of all trades for art, but people love specializing. I don't. I like all forms. I think if you mix them up you get something cool. Like what Jack Stauber does, I think it's genuinely the most coolest shit ever. But going into post-secondary will hard because if I choose to do one thing, i'll feel really bad for not doing other stuff and only learning that one thing. Because like I said, I love mixing stuff up and creating something special.

im just confused but i got so little time....