#but it really does look like everyone involved has just done an exceptional job on this. should i punish all of them just because of ezra's

[oveliagirlhaditright]

-sighs- Why is the The Flash movie trailer so good? -cries-

[bonny-kookoo]

Jungkook

Dearly Beloved 🔞 Final.

In which you've got a crush on your coworker- and a stalker problem.

Tags/Warnings: I do not condone any of Jungkooks questionable actions, this is fiction, soft Yandere!Jungkook, stalking, criminal actions (trespassing, stealing), obsession, he's really not quite right in the head, mc is kind of stupid for not involving police but wbk

Additional Chapter Warnings: insert 'oh no' tiktok meme here.

Length: long?

There is no taglist for this fic.

-> Masterlist

•━━━━━━━━━━•.♡.•━━━━━━━━━━━━•

He's gonna do it. He has to. What if he misses his chance? You already love him.

You just don't know it yet.

But the entire day at the office, someone steals your attention away. There's always someone standing at your desk, asking pointless things, chasing you around like a slave for things that could've been a fucking e-mail. Why do you need to go and copy something for Yaerin when she's got to working legs?

Maybe if she didn't wear those high heels she constantly trips in she would be able to do her job correctly. Or maybe she's simply a viper, trying to work you down until you burn out, unable to offer this place anymore of your energy. She's done it before. She'll do it again.

People like her disgust him. She's rotten to the core, especially considering how she constantly soils the office seats in the meeting room with her disgusting perfume every time she fucks another one of the higher ups in there. He knows it's happening, has walked in on her and a CEO once- and while he told her that her secret was safe with him, he really only did it to have something up his sleeve if he ever needed her for something.

Does that make him just as rotten as her? Maybe. But all is fair in love and war.

He can't help but fidget at this point, watching how you clearly try and stay nice to a coworker currently attempting to convince you to go drinking with everyone after this shift. You don't like karaoke, you don't even drink in social settings because it makes you anxious- Jungkook knows these things.

He would never ask something of you that you're not comfortable with- he'd take you out for your favorite fast food instead to eat it in the car while listening to crappy pop-songs on the radio. That's what you love.

You've mentioned it before. And he never forgets those things.

Who's that man to you anyways? He can sense the tenseness in your muscles as the guy leans on your table, clearly taking up space and showing that he's not going to leave anytime soon- and Jungkook feels his anger grow inside his chest. You don't like this guy. He needs to get him away from you.

"Uh- Steven, right?" Jungkook meekly asks, the man's face snapping to him with an annoyed smile.

"Yeah. What's up kook?" He jokes as if they're best buddies.

They're not. Jungkook couldn't care less if the guy died in a ditch.

"I think Yaerin wanted to talk to you about something being wrong with the calculations for last month?" Jungkook stammers, needing to uphold his image. And also, he can't help it- his emotions make him quiver a bit, muscles unable to stay still as he rubs his hands. "She said it's urgent." He presses.

That's actually only half a lie. It's not urgent- but that whore did want to talk to him about something. There probably won't be much talking involved except maybe a command to take his dick further down her throat- but Jungkook doesn't care what they do. The only thing he does care about is that he fucking leaves.

Which he does, finally, making Jungkook take in a deep breath as he watches the man walk off.

"Thank you so much." You say behind him, and when Jungkook turns around to look at you, you're gazing at him with such warm eyes he feels his trembling body levitate on nothing but thin air. Everything's alright again- if he could look at you like this for the next years of his life, he'd thank every god in existence for it. "I have.. a hard time telling people no." You sigh, running your hands over your face.

"That's.. that's fine." Jungkook nods, a little awkwardly, smiling back. "I'm not that.. good at it either." He chuckles, and you laugh along, already feeling a lot better.

"Do you.. uhm.." You look at your keyboard for a second before you lick your lips- is that new lipgloss you wear? Or did you eat something that stained them? Jungkook isn't sure, but he wants a taste. "Do you wanna.. grab a drink or two after work with me?" You wonder, rushing the sentence out, and Jungkook's lips part a little, eyes round and open as they stare you down with their boba-pearl charm.

"Uh- yes! Yes, sure!" He nods, closing his mouth, before he pats his pants, looking for his phone. "W-wait, I'll uh- I'll give you my number!" He rushes out, writing it down with trembling hands on a sticky note, before offering it to you, who smiles shyly.

"Alright!" You nod. "I'll.. see you tonight then?" You ask, and Jungkook nods, entire body set aflame.

"Tonight."

•━━━━━━━━━━•.♡.•━━━━━━━━━━━━•

He fucked up.

He fucked up.

He fucked up.

He's pacing in front of your door because you surely know. You had to have found out- there's no way you didn't. The moment you texted him, he knew you knew-

because he gave you the wrong number. In his panic, he gave you a number you already have.

Is the police on its way? Did you call the cops? Or another friend maybe to beat the shit out of him? You must be terrified, creeped out to no ends, and he can't blame you. What the hell did he even do? This isn't right.

"Jungkook?" You ask, ripping him out of whatever panicked episode he was going through, wild eyes staring at you who's looking at him with an unreadable expression.

It's quiet as you stare each other down, tension able to be cut with a knife for a good while, before you speak.

"You could've.. just said something." You mumble, and Jungkook isn't sure what you mean. There's a variety of things and situations this sentence could apply to- and he doesn't want to out himself if he's not caught yet. If there's just a simple chance of getting away with it, he will take it. "Do you... like me this much?" You ask, and he's swallowing thickly now.

You clearly want an answer, but he doesn't know in what context. What is he supposed to say.

"I mean, I knew something was off when.." you explain, playing with the strings of your hoodie as you fumble with your words. "When.. I wasn't scared." You admit.

"Because it was you all along."

His entire body grows cold, veins freezing over as he gets his confirmation. You know. You know, and you're probably going to tell him next that you've already asked for a restraining order-

Wait. What do you mean by you weren't scared?

"Do you want to.. come in with permission this time?" You ask, trying to lighten the mood, but he's confused. This isn't the reaction he thought he'd get.

"I-" he starts, stammers. "I'm sorry." He presses out. "I don't.. I just-" he fails to find appropriate words because he really doesn't know why he's like this. He knows it's a problem, he knows he's sick- it's obvious, that little sane part of him is aware of the pure wrongness of his actions up until now.

"I know." You say, nodding, before you step aside to let him inside.

"I can't." Jungkook denies. "I can't- I shouldn't, I'm not- don't let me in, don't ever let me in-" he worries, unsure what's wrong with him now. Is this what realization feels like?

If that's the case, he wants to go back to insanity, because this is torturous.

"Its fine." You reassure. "You're.. I'd really hate to see you leave right now." You deny, offering compassion. "You're not well right now." You say, and he agrees.

But he's never been well ever since he met you almost a year ago.

He'll never be well.

"You're too.. you shouldn't. I might hurt you." He explains in a hurry.

"You won't." You deny. You're not sure why you're so convinced about it- maybe because he's had the chance to hurt you so many times and didn't. Or maybe because you're so lonely that you'll take this love no matter how tainted it is.

"Please come inside." You ask once more.

And slowly, with great hesitance, does he enter your home, painfully wringing his hands as if to keep himself occupied.

"When my mom had a brain stroke, years ago, she changed a lot." You explain, walking in to fill up two glasses of water before you set them on the coffee table in the living room area, sitting down on the couch right after- inviting him.

He takes the invitation. His eyes sting with unshed tears.

"She suddenly hated me. Hated almost everyone." You remember. "The doctors said that it can happen. That if we.. injure just a tiny little specific part of our brains, our whole personality changes." You retell, and Jungkook listens, unsure where to look now.

He's been here before, but he's never seen the apartment with the lights on.

"But we still got along until she passed." You nod. "She went to therapy, and reconnected with me and her old friends." You say.

"I'm.. I think I know what you're suggesting-" he says, before he puts his face in his hands. "But I don't want to." He denies.

"Why not?" You worry with a soft tone. "Jungkook, you're not a bad person. You just need help." You offer.

"But what if my love for you is just mental illness?!" He yells out, panicked, eyes now leaking tears. "I don't want them to kill that. I want to stay- I want to stay sick if it means that I still love you.." he weeps, looking at you with desperation.

"Then we'll rebuild it." You shrug easily. "I'll make you love me again." You say, and Jungkook breaks.

"C-can I touch you?" He whimpers from the other side of the couch. "Just a bit?" He wonders, and you nod, opening your arms.

Welcoming him, because he's not a threat or a danger or a monster.

He's just a little sick.

[gallusrostromegalus]

Hi, if the asks for AEIWAM are still open, can you share some more regarding the 12th division transitioning to taking over R&D, thanks to Urahara? Did the other divisions take it well, were there fights over boundaries/responsibilities/secrets? Individual divisions holding onto research directly relating to their remits? And how did Mayuri taking over from Urahara impact relations with other divisions?

Urahara proposing a dedicated research and development branch was not a particularly unexpected move, and a wildly applauded one.

His predecessor, now-Royal-Guard Hikifune, had done extensive research and development on her own when she developed both the modern Gikon and the Mod Souls like Kon. The 4th was massively overworked but still doing their own medical research. The Kido corps had been doing their own R&D writ: spells for ages. The 7th division had been tracking death and soul statistics like where souls reincarnated in the Rukongai and who went to hell and why for centuries. "Science" is a very strong word for what the 11th was doing re: destruction, but by golly they were doing a lot of it.

So Urahara's idea to develop a cross-division group dedicated to connecting existing research and developing new lines of inquiry from there was an extremely logical step and one pretty much everyone regarded as a good move.

---

Everyone, except Aizen.

See, Aizen had been doing his own little experiments with creating and perfecting the Hogyoku and those experiments involved a shitload of murder and other crimes, not to mention the whole treason thing, and Aizen was worried that if Kisuke managed to say, actually collate and look over the Rukongai crime stats Aizen had been hiding or read up on the Kido corps work, he might be JUST smart enough to figure out what Aizen was up to.

So Aizen made sure that when they got caught, that the experiments he'd been running would look like Kisuke's work :)

I think Aizen also had a significant hand in making sure it was the literal clown Mayuri who got the job after Urahara fled. There were definitely better candidates to become the Gotei-13's quartermain, but I think Aizen either discouraged them, or figured out how to make Mayuri look way more sane than he actually was to the other captains when the vote came.

Mayuri was a disaster for R&D. Not only were his scientific methods dubious at best, none one the other divisions trusted him with their work, and all of them became a lot more secretive and paranoid.

The 4th resumed it's own medical research, which was slow because of all the other work the 4th needed to do as well. The 7th kept its statistics under lock and key lest Mayuri get funny ideas about killing people to measure things faster. This new cloaked way of doing business allowed Mayuri to engage in horrors that actively got in the way of progress. Like recruiting the top 10% of the academy's graduating class for his division and then using them as guinea pigs and/or explosives.

Aizen: All According to Keikaku :)

---

In AEIWAM, not all hope was lost.

Before he was a shinigami, Kaname Tousen was a Librarian.

It was all he ever really wanted to be- when he came to the seireitei it was entirely to investigate his sister's death. He had no intention of enrolling in the academy, or pursuing rank.

Aizen has a way of derailing people's lives.

By force, when necessary.

By pounding 44 magical nails into Tousen's spine and carving command kanji into his shoulders and inflicting a vile curse on him to force Kaname into being his co-conspirator, his own personal R&D, and his entertaining puppet, if necessary.

Well,

Maybe Aizen is having a little bit more fun than strictly "necessary".

Aizen might have cursed Tousen into silence and obedience, but he can't stop Tousen from keeping his own records. Meticulous notes about every excursion he is made to take, every crime he is forced to commit, every horrific act Tousen does through tears- everything is recorded, documented, and safely stored in triplicate in several locations and formats.

In fact, Aizen comes to rely on those records- Aizen is very good at Lying and Kido and Hubris but that is the extent of his intellectual prowess. He relies on Gin to keep track of what everyone else is doing, and on Tousen to do all the scheduling, lab work, provisions and actually keeping the aarancar in line.

And Kaname takes advantage to press the curse whenever he can- he was close, he was so. Fucking. Close! To getting the whole scheme exposed during Turn Back The Pendulum.

He tried. He tried and tried to say it when Yamamoto interrogated him, to confess his sins and bring Gin and Aizen down with him, to make himself understood.

-Who did this? Who killed captain Hirako?

-I know them! I know, but I can not say!

It's all Kaname can manage before the curse retaliates, and almost strangles him to death to keep his silence, invisible to Yamamoto because of Aizen's illusions.

---

...after the nature of the curse is revealed, Yamamoto listens to the recording of that interrogation and weeps. The captains are the closest thing he has to children. Yamamoto hears this man who is almost his son, screaming, begging him to understand -

Not "I don't know"

Not "I will not say"

"I know, but I can not say."

---

So Kaname bides his time, keeps his records and tries to distract himself form his situation by drawing what conclusions he can.

After the Winter War, there is some debate as to what's going to happen to R&D.

Mayuri is in a jar, battling for control of his body.

Nemu refuses to admit he's out of action. Akon refuses to be promoted.

Kisuke or whoever does run the 12 will be too busy shovelling leftover war crimes out of the basement to actually run R&D.

Yamamoto has a long-standing agreement with Unohana that if he makes her take on One More Thing, he will not get the privilege of dying.

Ukitake is running the Kido corps, but he's also already got a foot in the grave.

Yamanoto isn't sure he can trust anyone else with lab equipment.

" ...Tousen." he says, nonchalant, visiting him in the hospital. "You seem to be rather accomplished at record-keeping and lab work."

"Last time you promoted me while I was in the hospital after a catastrophe, it extended my recovery by a solid five years and lead to an even greater one. No. Tell Kisuke to buck up and run R&D, it was his damn idea in the first place."

"Yes, obviously." Yamanoto says as though he had been planning that at all. "-but the court guard still needs to be supplied, so if Kisuke is running R&D, who is running the 12th?

"Muguruma."

"Pardon?"

"Kensei Muguruma might be the second-worst boss I've ever had but he is rigorously punctual, has an incredible work ethic, and can be trusted to stick to rules and regulations to the letter. He's a rigid, grouchy, hard ass, and a terrible match for the ninth, but he'd make an excellent quartermain." Kaname sighs.

Yamamoto ponders that for a bit.

"Also, he's running the newspaper over my dead body." Kaname elaborates. "He's contracted horoscope brainrot from Mashiro, I'm afraid."

"He may attempt to dispute that he should be running the Ninth as his prior demotion was unlawful, as is his right." Yamamoto nods. "It would be resolved by some kind of combat."

"I've gutted him once, I'll do it again." Kaname grunts and Yamamoto barks a laugh.

"I believe your judgement is sound, and will abide by your recommendation." Yamamoto nods, patting Kaname's hand. "I will inform Urahara and Muguruma of their new responsibilities."

"...Thank you, sir." Kaname mumbles, listening to Yamamoto open his notebook and write something down. "For your trust in me, and not promoting me again."

"Hm." Yamamoto nods.

To-Do: Update last will and testament in regards to successor choice. He writes.

[inkdragonworks]

June Update

Breaking the chain of not updating to talk about what I've been working on. As the absence of Poppin & Jupa here can tell, I switched projects back in April, to an older one I worked on for about 8 months in 2022. Main reason was feeling dejected a bit after the animation didn't do as well as I was expecting; been getting the impression that Tiera is more popular than them with folks lol.

Again I won't be cancelling it, or never working on PnJ, just switching focus so I can stay productive and make something that feels fun for me, which this has.

------------------------------

As a refresher, here's the game I've been picking at:

The game's current design can be broken down into:

intro sequence to introduce Tiera and the setting

initial puzzle + encounter to introduce the main mechanics

large hub in the form of Fragaria Park where you avoid the main threat, collect items, interact with side attractions, and access the 4 side areas

4 side areas, which have their own puzzles/challenges within with a primary goal at the end that progresses you towards the final escape

optional collectibles Since April I've worked on a part of the large hub, 3 of the 4 side areas, and the optional collectibles.

"Who works on optional stuff before the main game is done" well they play off of the main mechanics but mainly it's an excuse to draw something cute instead of programming.

These are Anna Banana and The Fruit Friends (Also Strawberry), characters from a cartoon show that Tiera likes (Except Strawberry).

They don't play any significant role/impact in the game (Besides Strawberry), but they reveal part of Tiera's interests, they form a small bit of the world's background, they make for fun type of collectible that gives something to do besides the main puzzles, and, again, I just felt like drawing cute shit.

------------------------------

For the hub, I worked on a themed side area dedicated to a playground. This does have puzzle elements in it, but a lot of it are silly interactions, and a reference to that cartoon I did a while back. Maybe you can recognize it here.

It's one of those "makes the setting feel more realized/fleshed out" deals.

------------------------------

For the side areas, what I've mainly been doing is settling on their exact design, blocking out the areas, and working on their puzzle sequence, obstacles, and any single screens that are tied to it.

Here's what I mean by "single screen":

Something that cuts away from the main game to it's own puzzle. This one here is for the performance theater. All graphics are placeholders just to get the logic in and see if it might work.

Making these type of puzzles is fun cause it reminds me the most of Resident Evil 1 and various flash adventure games I've played.

As for obstacles, a significant one I'm playing with for the theater is darkness, making use of Tiera's sonar to detect a safe path around deep pits.

She won't fall off right away, but it's tied to the same stamina system.

------------------------------

Another side area are the sewers, everyone's favorite video game setting. That obviously involves water, but the trickiest thing about it has been dealing with really complicated patterns of depth changing.

What that means is Tiera climbing up and falling down a lot, and trying to keep track of that. Here's what that looks like without proper graphics:

I'm very happy with how the area is turning out so far though, it's something you'd get to later and I think the puzzles do a good job of reflecting that progression.

------------------------------

The last side area I've poked at was the final sequence of the game. I've had a lot of different ideas of how to go about it but I think I'm happy with the set of them I have planned, something that builds up towards the climax and building off of what was set up in the rest of the game.

I wanna be careful about spoiling it, but here's one effect from it I've started work on:

------------------------------

I'm trying not to overshare here, though there's a lot more I've thrown into my server that I couldn't here. One of the side areas I haven't gotten to really pinning down is the Hedge Maze. I have a basic outline, but the main obstacle involved requires more dynamic logic. It's hard to settle on what that logic should be without set level design, and it's hard to settle on level design without knowing the limitations of that logic.

It's a similar issue with the main challenge of the game, both for the player and for designing: the ghosts.

What's intimidating is the feeling that they need to be very deliberate in this type of game, to balance between adding tension without veering into frustration. I'm hoping tackling everything surrounding them will make me more confident, but odds are I'll have to start with something simple and half-broken just to break the ice. And accepting I'll have to make something that gets thrown away, which I'm not used to doing... I really prefer thinking through stuff first before making it.

Anyway, thank you for reading.

[666writingcafe]

Quick-Fire Headcanons (10)

Solomon and Barbatos always reference something obscure when they choose their costumes.

Beel get strangely competitive when it comes to carnival/amusement park games.

Levi’s favorite part of any tabletop game is exploring the environment his character is in.

Asmo has been caught numerous times sleeping in class.

Mammon and Asmo both make up elaborate and unique excuses for why they couldn’t make it to a certain event.

Simeon has to pretend he hates tragedies.

Lucifer has to pretend he loves tragedies.

Asmo has a really hard time letting go of the past.

Satan keeps a journal in order to deal with his emotions in a non-destructive way.

As much as he knows he’s going to have to write one eventually, Simeon does not want to publish an autobiography or memoir for his human world alias.

Solomon has been asked to take part in a top secret project that required him to act as a double agent in order to get information on two warring clans in the Devildom.

Lucifer sometimes forgets that Cerberus is far from being a small dog.

Beel wishes he could have a farm in the human world because he thinks he would enjoy the manual labor involved.

Satan wishes he could volunteer or work at an animal clinic or shelter but knows he would get way too attached to the animals in order to do his job properly.

The concept of pets is foreign in the Celestial Realm, so when they are staying in the human world, Luke begs Simeon for an animal companion (but Simeon really isn’t interested in getting one, so he has to find creative ways of letting Luke down easy).

Once he learns about it, Asmo becomes obsessed with astrology and will look at everyone’s horoscopes.

Levi is creeped out by space, whereas Satan is creeped out by what’s in the ocean.

Asmo and Lucifer have been known to camp outside a theater together in order to see the opening performance.

Solomon and Belphie will hit the discount cinemas together to make fun of dumb B-rated movies.

Lucifer, Barbatos, and Diavolo share a love for musicals.

Simeon remains polite during arguments or debates, but that doesn’t mean he won’t utterly destroy his opponent; it just means that he won’t succumb to low blows and name-calling.

Lucifer and Solomon are not always sincere in their apologies (with the exception of MC) but feel like they are necessary in order to continue moving forward and getting work done.

Diavolo and Mammon both like driving with their music on full blast and the windows down.

[kedreeva]

Honestly, I don't think Steve even noticed what he did or didn't feel or what he was or was not actually lacking in his parents until post-Nancy. He's exactly the sort of person who doesn't think about something unless he has to. I'm NOT saying he's stupid, just that literally he does not think about things he thinks aren't worth thinking about, and I genuinely do not think he thinks his parents are worth thinking about unless it's to plan around them.

"My dad's a grade-A asshole" and Steve worrying about getting in trouble if his dad finds out what he's done is in direct opposition to his willingness to do the thing in the first place, if he thinks about his father beforehand. "My parents are not home" and "my parents are somewhere else" are separate thoughts, and what matters to the plans Steve wants to make is the latter, and I'm not entirely sure he recognizes the former as a problem. His parents not being home is the solution to 'my dad's an asshole.' His parents not being home is a point in his favor, not a problem

And honestly, why would it be a problem then? Season 1 Steve has parents he prefers to be absent, and friends that are quicker to sneer and bite than they are to smile. Season 1 Steve, prior to getting sense literally knocked into him, is concerned about getting in trouble rather than worrying about his gf having just lost her best friend. Season 1 Steve takes one look at Jonathan in Nancy's room and his first reaction isn't to worry about Nancy's well-being, not yet. His first reaction is to rile up his sharp-teethed friends and go be destructive. Before Nancy scolds him and Jonathan hits him and an entire fucking monster drops through the ceiling and tears his paradigm of the world apart, I don't think it really occurred to Steve that things should (or even could) be different. Parents are just like that, right? Everyone's parents and family and friends are just like that. Right?

Except, then he's seeing what Jonathan and Nancy will do for Jonathan's little brother, how all the kids stick together and fight for each other. What Joyce will do for her son, what Hopper will do for her kids, for the small, strange girl they're saying has superpowers. The way Dustin's mom loves him, even if she's a little oblivious. How even the parents who know nothing, like the Sinclairs and the Wheelers, actually do love their kids; it's not a show. They're not in the news, they have no reputation to keep up, there's no one to impress. They just genuinely love their children. This friend group genuinely cares about each other. even when they are at odds with each other, they care. Absolutely mindblowing to the kid who couldn't get his family or friends to give a shit about anything, including him.

And I think he gets a bigger inkling about it all at the start of season 2, when he gets more involved in the whole group, but I think the moment he realizes he's got to protect Max from her family that it really clicks about his own family. She's scared about what her brother will do, and Steve remembers being scared about what his father would do. And it's one thing to kind of Know that your parents are not good, and be in the middle of coping with it, but it's another to see that reflected in someone else and realize oh.

And I think that's.... I think that directly leads to what's going on with Steve in season 3. He mentions his dad wanting to teach him a lesson and we can assume it's about Having A Job and Work Ethic etc, and maybe it is, but I think no small part of it is also that Steve got more defensive toward his parents about them being bad parents. I think instead of just being mad that he wasn't gonna get his way with them like in S1, or cranky they were gonna punish him for doing Teenage Stuff he thinks he should get away with, that he was actually a little hurt that his parents were more like Max's family than like Dustin's or Will's or even Lucas or Mike's. And I can imagine his dad reacting the way Entitled Parents act when their kid figures them out, and saying well if we're so terrible how about you experience what it is like without us, so you can see how much you owe us for everything we do for you.

and he ends up at Scoops Ahoy, because his dad is trying to teach him a lesson, but it's NOT a lesson about work ethic, it's a lesson about how to be grateful for the things his parents give him, as if taking care of their child was a favor that Steve now needs to pay back.

Except the lesson he learns is that he can pick his family. The lesson he learns is that his family sucks. And yeah, the lesson he learns is that he hates the way things have gone, he hates the big empty house, he hates the distance his parents put between them (while simultaneously being grateful for it because he doesn't want to be close to THEM, he wants to be close to better parents). And his reaction to that isn't to want better things with his family. Maybe if he was someone else, but this is the boy who doesn't think about things that aren't worth thinking about, and it's not worth thinking about something that will never happen. His parents will never be those people and, frankly, he doesn't want them to be. It's too late. Cut that loss.

His reaction, rather, is to imagine having a new family, one where no kids are going to be alone because there will be more than one of them, a family where no kids are treated like Max was, or untreated at all like he was, because he'll be there for them. That's something he can think about as long as he likes.

[boxfullaturtles]

I want to know all the things about your KH AU. Please just tell me things, because I love it.

oh Kingdom Hearts AU, how i have neglected you…. UnU what can I say about KH AU hhhmm (aside from having Raph's ref sheet half done and then getting distracted by a million other things lol) let's see........

Donnie loses his heart at some point. Not because of a Heartless or other enemy, but because he pushes himself too hard and too far.

He does create a Heartless. I don't know what kind of Nobody he leaves behind

The rest of the family do end up finding--and fighting--Donnie's Heartless. How do they know it's Donnie's? Well, aside from Mikey being able to sense Donnie's Heart, buried and smothered in Darkness, there's a certain...Donatello flavor to the way the Heartless looks.

I have not finished designing the Donnie Heartless.

How do they get Donnie back? I dunno. Maybe it involves the piece of his Heart he left with Shelldon.

What's in the half of Donnie's lab that no one ever gets to see? That's a secret. For now.

Casey's Future Leo only had one Keyblade and it wasn't Arc Hope, so Future Leo didn't have portals. In fact, Future Leo's Keyblade didn't seem like it fit him at all. A heavy hitter with a reverse grip didn't really fit his fighting style. But he made it work.

Future Mikey was so powerful that his Keyblade kind of just...floated around him, like an extension of himself. He wielded it kind of like how Sora's Final Form uses Keyblades in KH2.

Casey Junior gets a shock when he sees the present day Keyblades. And an even bigger one when Leo portals. And then the biggest one when Leo gains Synch Blade and dual Keyblades.

I love the design of Before the Fall so damn much. But I don't think it fits Leo very well overall. I think after the Krang, the whole thing is weighing heavily on his Heart and he can't let it go. So while he has a lot more faith in his family (After the Rise), he's struggling with keeping that faith in himself. It's letting doubt and Darkness creep into his Heart and it's going to take some work and character development for him to overcome this. Before the Fall is a little too heavy with Darkness for him.

When Leo DOES find himself in a better place, Before the Fall will change. To what? I haven't decided yet. I just don't think Leo should be forced to carry a burden like that Keyblade. He deserves something better.

April's Keyblade is the only one I haven't figured out a name for yet.

In the silly TMNT AU Competition comic I did, Donnie mentions a "Worlds We Are Banned From" list. This is a real list. They have been forbidden from returning to some worlds for...reasons. The reasons may or may not be because of shit they've done.

Raph and Leo sort of co-lead the group, but Raph still acts as the big brother most of the time, trying to wrangle his siblings into behaving. Except when he's acting out too, and then it's April's job.

April getting a Keyblade was an accident. Donnie accidentally did it when they were little.

What's Draxum doing in this AU? Why did he make the turtles? What are the Foot Clan doing? How does The Shredder work? Fuck if I know. What, you think I planned this or something?

Yes, there is magic that alters their appearance depending on what kind of world they land on. Most of the time, it's like a surface level glamour that only affects the eyes of the inhabitants (this is my headcanon as to why no questions why a duck and a dog are following Sora around 90% of the time, they look human on worlds with humans). There have been a few worlds where they've had to deal with physical transformations. Suffice it to say that those have been an absolute riot for everyone.

And...that's all I got. For now anyway. There is still some stuff I'm working on, but it's sort of taken a back seat to everything else...

[spacerangersam]

Could you tell me more about some of your ocs???? (Only if you’re up for it tho)

I’m always down to gush about my ocs! But I do have a lot of them, especially with the story I'm currently working on, and I don’t always know what to say, so sorry if this is a bit all over the place. This isn’t even everyone, I left out a few like the main antagonist, Irene and a few other side characters for the sake of this not being essay length but yeah. Here are some of the main guys:

(also, unless otherwise specified, they're all welsh)

Simon Huw Taylor, 32, tenant of flat no. 6, he/they, bi and ace (maybe on the aro spectrum, but idk. It’s none of my business).

He’s the main character of my story, Where the Lost Souls Meet. He’s a pretty quiet guy who likes to keep to himself, much to his own detriment. He’s been travelling around all his life, never really interacting with people his own age, leaving him with mediocre socialising skills. He can see ghosts, has been able to since childhood, and is a mortician while doing psychic ghost stuff on the side. His mum could also see ghosts and she also did the ghost business, which is why he and his parents were moving around all the time, basically living in their van/hotels). To honour her, Simon uses her maiden name for ghost work (meaning his name is then Simon Huw Hughes, which I just thought was cute). She died a few years back, his father even earlier, leaving Simon the last of his family line and all alone in the world.

His whole life revolves around death, which isn’t healthy but Simon would rather die than go to therapy and actually address his problems, so it stays that way for a while. He does try to quit smoking though, so that’s something. He is also a liar. Dear god does he love to lie about everything and anything, to everyone. Well, I say loves to lie, he doesn’t really love it. He does it both to keep himself safe and to keep others from worrying about him. Honestly, he’s fine, he’s functional, and he definitely has family who loves him. Just don’t ask to meet his ‘sister’. He also tries to protect people by keeping a certain distance from them, not wanting to hurt them like he’s been hurt because of [REDACTED], which is why he kept moving around even after his mother died. But he desperately wanted top surgery and so stopped in this town with a well-known trans-safe doctor to get it done, and unfortunately for him landed in a manor turned flat filled with people who very much would like to be his friends, please.

He has no hope for the future, no plans, having a fairly pessimistic look on life because of [REDACTED], and is basically just waiting for the day he finally dies. Again, will he do anything about this? Maybe, eventually, at some point.

He doesn’t like / struggles to watch TV and movies, his ideal night involves doing puzzles and maybe a spot of reading, he loves puns and he’s a vegetarian. I love him and his terrible coping mechanism. Go king, communicate absolutely nothing and never let people share your burdens. 

Also, his neighbour dies in front of him during an argument one day, which isn't great, going on to haunt Simon in a distinctly violent fashion, which is the thing he's desperately trying to deal with in the story.

more losers under the cut

Charlie Tops, 35, tenant no. 5, he/him, trans bi+ace. He’s a very sweet guy, very open, with major himbo energy, just without the muscles. He makes the best tea and the worst coffee. He writes kid's books in the vein of Winnie the Pooh / Peter Rabbit, taking over the job after his grandfather passed, now writing them for his own daughter, Lottie. But Lottie’s getting older and losing interest in those types of books, and so he’s losing interest in writing them and having a mild panic over what he’ll do next. He’s kinda obsessed with taxidermies. His flat is quite literally filled with them and no one likes it, nobody wants to be in there, and the vibes are way off (except Will for, who thinks it’s very interesting, actually).

He’s deeply in love with Simon and they have a thing. An unexplained, deeply intimate thing that neither talk about, mostly because Simon can’t communicate for shit (which he feels deeply guilty about, and he keeps telling himself that he’ll break it off but can never quite work up to it), and Charlie’s worried if he asks, Simon will end it. He really struggles with Simon’s whole silent martyr ordeal even outside their thing because even if he doesn’t know the extent to which Simon is trying to hide his problems, he knows there is something being hidden, but again, is worried about pushing too hard and losing him completely. It’s messy, but they’ll work through it. 

He can’t see ghosts but does know about them, unlike the other Woodward tenants, and feels a bit left out /awkward about the whole thing. He had an amicable divorce from his wife Irene after he realised he was ace, she realised she was aro, and that they were both trans, the two staying friends and her staying on as the illustrator for his books. And as I mentioned earlier, he does have a daughter, Lottie.

William Isaiah Beaton, 30, tenant no. 7, he/him, gay, English. An archivist for the local museum who moves into the manor in chapter one, and comes off as a tough, rude ex-vet.  And that is true, to a certain extent. He is rude, and an ex-vet. But he wasn’t in the army for long, he got mowed down by a car on base like, two weeks after arriving, leaving him with a permanent injury to his leg. He feels he failed to live up to his father’s expectations, and in shame, never told the truth to his father about having to leave the forces. Will has… a lot of complicated feelings about that, and his relationship with his father, and his relationship with his religion. He works some of that last one out with help from Penny.

It’s a bit of a spoiler, but whatever- he can see ghosts. He doesn’t realise that’s what’s happening though and instead is fully convinced he’s just losing his mind, and that crash did irreparable damage to his head. Nah though, just ghosts. Has a guilty love of werewolf media and cake, and cares a lot about bugs and plants (he even ends up taking Simon’s plants off him, because Simon kills every plant he owns, without question). He has limited zero social skills and finds big groups overwhelming, but nevertheless, he will be dragged into this friendship group (if Penny has any say in it, at least). He came to Hangar for a reason, though he doesn’t say why.

He also definitely fancies Simon and has no idea how to handle that. It’s the first time he’s fancied a man (or at least, a man-adjecent person) who isn’t straight, and that coupled with the fatc Simon actually seems to like him is just a lot for him to process. The two of them bond over their shared loved of history / interest in the history of the manor.

I should make it clear: this isn’t a love triangle, this is poly thing.

The ghouls:

Florence Blossom (left), 40, and Gwenllian Baker (right), 42. Both were performers in a small acting trope who died in 1941 (though not at the same time or in the same way, funnily enough) in the manor Simon lives in. They love each other very much.

Florence is a bit judgy, loves a good moan, and is very anxious about everything and everyone, always. Her anxiety tends to make her come off as a bit snappy. She can control the lights.

Gwen is a bit vacant, with her head absolutely in the clouds at all times. She struggles a bit with empathy and reading the room, leading her to be mindlessly cruel sometimes. She never means it though and genuinely cares about Simon and Florence, and will look after them both in her own weird ways. she can lock, unlock, close and open doors

Now back to the living:

Agatha Jeorme, 55, tenant  no. 1. She’s kinda like if an angsty teen was stuck in the body of a middle-aged woman, and we love her for that. She’s the daughter of the landlord and hates it. If she had any other skills / if her father had helped her get a better opportunity elsewhere like he did with her brothers, she would have jumped on it. But instead, he gave her the job of looking after Woodward. She hates him, deeply. She often shovels off small jobs onto Simon because she knows he won’t say no, and is having an affair with the next-door neighbour’s wife. I kind of made her sound like a bastard, and she is kinda, but a fun one I hope, and she does learn to be less of a bastard as the story goes on. 

Gwynfor Geraint Jones, 34, tenant no. 2, he/she, bigender, aroace. Just a chill guy who loves rock music and slasher movies. She’s in a QPR with Adam, them being the first two to move into Woodward. this isn't entirely related to his character, but he's called gwynfor geraint after two twins i went to primary school with. their names always stuck in my head, in so i thought i'd put them to good use.

Adam Diana Keats, 36 tenant tenant, no.3, she/her, aroace trans woman, Scottish. She’s a librarian with a love of reading, especially poetry, and a bit pushy, a bit bossy, but ultimately well-meaning. She’ll drag Simon out of his room but with the intent to encourage him to mingle and hang out with the Woodward crew, you know. She hates Will on sight. There’s more I could say, but that would be spoilers. also, despite her dark academic vibes, she does love a good animal print

Penny Sion Seagrove, 29, no.4, she/her, lesbian. A tired, friendly gardener who would love it if everyone would get along and be friendly. She sometimes sticks her nose in places she shouldn’t to figure out people’s beef with each other (cough, Adam and Will, cough) to see if she can find a way to squash it for them, which doesn’t usually work. She tries anyway. She’s Catholic, shares Simon’s love of puns, and is dating Alice.

Alice Rhodri Blackwood, 30, she/her, trans lesbian. She lives in town with her best mate Mickey. She’s a loud, cheery, extroverted goth with an interest in witchcraft who can also see ghosts. She has slightly different opinions about ghosts and how they work from Simon, but she’s still his go-to when he’s having ghost issues. 

Mickey Dolores Palmer, 29, she/her, English (Yorkshire). Idk what her deal is, and she just is, you know. A very nervous, clumsy, mousy person who works at the local museum. She tends to jump to conclusions and is not a fan of ghosts. Unfortunately, she can also see ghosts, so that’s not great for her. She's doing her best.

god i wrote way too much for this, sorry asdfghj. but uh, also, i did a voice claim video for some of these losers, if you're interested. also,t hank you so much for asking. i do love talking about these idiots

[nytehavyn-circle]

Aloysius Thompson

FC: Viggo Mortensen Sexuality: [Wait, this guy has a sexuality?] [Is 'cat lady' a sexuality?] Age: [REDACTED] [Alright, so why is this redacted? We're not allowed to know anyone's age now? How does that comprom-] [It's a spy thing. Shhhh.] Height: 5'11' Species: Human Occupation: Spy [Yeah, but he's really bad at it.]

In 19XX, Aloysius Thompson was born to parents, [REDACTED] and [REDACTED]. He wasn't a very bright child, showing a fascination with playing in the cat's litter box. [Well, that explains that...]

Despite all the love and education his parents gave to him, Aloysius still remained, well, dumb. Oh, he was a loving, good-hearted, and good-natured young man, he just wasn't very good at anything else.

But he became enraptured by his dad's life - that of a spy! From a young age, he thought, "Hey, I want to be a spy, too!" even if this was a particularly bad idea.

[Wait. Wait, wait. I just noticed something... This guy is ****** son?] [Well, yeah, it's how he got the job. But, hush, that'll be coming up son.]

After years of training with his father, Aloysius was still bad at spy stuff. His dad sent him to the best spy trainers, and it did no good. Aloysius was terrible.

But, the agency owed his father a huge favor, due to [REDACTED][CENSORED][REDACTED].

[*sound of record scratching*]

[WAIT, WHAT DID HIS DAD DO??] [I dunno. It was never discussed.] [Aw, man, this is bull*beep*! ...Why was I censored?] [New rules. All reports now have a "no-cursing" policy.] [Oh, That's a crock of *beep*!]

The Agency spent massive amounts of money on Aloysuis' training. Even going so far as to send him to [REDACTED] in [REDACTED]. In fact, [REDACTED][REDACTED].

[REDACTED]

[REDACTED]

[Everything in this report is being redacted... *sigh*] [Yeah, that's the new spy policy now. Can't say too much.] [I highly doubt anyone is looking for this guy, honestly.]

He failed everything. Especially disguises class. He was terrible at disguises. Everyone looked a variation of the same - himself. His accents were terrible, as well, coming out sounding like some vaguely Americanized Racist Asian Stereotype from those old TV movies we all loved when we were kids, but realized, as we got older [REDACTED].

[We're doing this now. Really? *sips coffee*] [Another Agency Spy policy. No politics in reports.] [What if the report is political in nature? Because spy work is usually political in nature... *sips more coffee*] [Hmm. That's an interesting point.] [One giant black page, huh?]

But, regardless, Aloysius Thompson became a spy. Finally. To the annoyance of all involved. Except Aloysius. He was happy. So was his father. Kind of.

Now, [REDACTED] years later, Aloysius is one of the Agency's worst spies. Having only ever completed a mission by sheer luck, with help from the Agency, whatever guardian angels might exist, and squirrels.

[...Squirrels?] [We're not allowed to talk about it.]

But still, he presses on and so forth!

Unfortunately.

He now lived alone, in a modest home, with his 27 cats. Seriously, they sleep on his bed and he sleeps on the floor. Oh, well. Guess that's not so bad if you like cats.

I don't see why he can't share the bed, though? I mean, a bunch of kitty snuggles sounds better than a hard floor [REDACTED FOR CHRIST'S SAKE!!]

[Are we done yet?] [Are you in a hurry or are you bored?] [Oh, I'm fascinated by this guy's "history." >>SARCASM DETECTED<< ...Seriously, I need to get home. My [REDACTED][REDACTED]. ... ARE YOU FU*BEEP* KIDDING ME? *sounds of stuff being thrown* THEY'RE REDACTING US NOW?] [Well. Agency Spy Policy. Too much information.] [...I'm going home, lock up when you're finished. *door slams*]

[... ... ... ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED??]

(This muse was created for shiggles. Right now, he's nothing more than comedic fodder for goofy threads. Maybe, in the future, I might expand his 'universe', so to speak, to give him more depth and more fleshing out. But for now, cannon fodder. Heh heh heh.)

[anoray]

Just a few more random thoughts about Season 5 of The Dragon Prince...

The animation design team does a knock out job on just about everything except horses. I do love horses and I find the ones in TDP just don’t seem to look and move very much like horses, kind of like the animators find them boring and don’t put much elbow grease into it. I mean, look at the really cool dragon in this sample comparison to the stuffed animal horses.

At least two horses got munched by the monster wolves during this season and nobody seemed to feel all that sorry for them. If it had been dragons, well. 

Don’t get me wrong, I loooove dragons, too, and the scene where Zubeia envisioned speaking with Avizandum was done so well and really touching.

I applaud this show for all its gorgeous dragon designs, like this stunning sea dragon and sun dragon!

Moving on, after a few stumbles in Season 4, the characters and relationships are developing nicely, especially Callum and Rayla and how Callum is struggling with his guilt over using dark magic. Viren’s slow turnaround has been intriguing but he needs to pay the piper for all the wrong he’s done. All in all, everyone seems to remain consistent with their core personality for the most part as they grow during their adventures together, but the glaring exception to me remains Claudia.

Ever since Season 1, I’ve never quite understood how her character can act so dimwitted a majority of the time, yet she’s somehow able to remember and cast complex spells. I’m still scratching my head over how neither of Viren’s children inherited much of his brain power, although Soren has really come a long way and it was great how he helped Deadwood/Elmer. Meanwhile, Claudia still goes from oohing and awwing over some little critter, then has no problem crushing it to do dark magic. Overall, I continue to find her Jekyll and Hyde portrayal uneven and jarring.

At this point, Claudia’s behavior is 95% petty and cruel unless it involves Terry or her father, plus the kicker is that she wouldn’t even be getting very far in her quest (or have anything left of her humanity) without the help of Terry.  

Speaking of Terry, I genuinely have no clue why this kindly, good hearted elf person:

Is still finding excuses to hang out with this pretty much obvious psychopath:

I guess Terry hopes he can help Claudia do less awful things by showing her love and kindness? But he’s the one putting all the effort into their relationship it seems. Unless the writers have Claudia undergo a major change of heart and help Callum, Ezran, and Rayla end Arravos, I’m not sure how she can be believably redeemed.

[eddies-artofsuffering]

September 1989

No, it’s great, he’s doing well. Not bad at all. Everything’s going just fine. College hasn’t been as bad as he’d imagined. Steve has everything he needs. He’s healthy. Employed. He has paid his rent on time, and he’ll get paid at the end of this week to pay for next month’s. There’s clothes on his back, food in his fridge and pantry. Most of all, it’s so liberating to be away from his practically nonexistent family, away from Hawkins and everything that was associated with the extensive mess. 

Okay. To be honest, being financially independent as a full-time student has been … difficult for Steve. But he’s making do. At least by working here at the school library via a work-study program, he could get flexible hours around his classes, and he could request a maximum of twenty hours a week. Shitty student wages aside, it’s a relatively cushy job, and it’s usually slow except during finals seasons, and there aren’t that many responsibilities. All Steve had to do was to learn the Dewey decimal system, learn how to shelf read, and be able to lift up to 50 pounds. Easy. That, and of course, deal with thousands of wide-eyed undergrads who come to the library with all sorts of purposes, agendas, and questions.

Meeting people at the circulation desk is a part of the job description. Steve’s pretty sure that he’s good at it. He’s had less than a year of work experience from both Scoops and Family Video combined, but customer service is customer service. If he’s gotta do it somewhere, there’s no debate; in his life full of terrible choices and mistakes, caving in to apply for college with Robin was definitely one of the best things he’s ever done. To his surprise - well, not about Robin, she’s brilliant - they’d both been accepted at the state school, far enough from Hawkins but not too far to visit if he really wanted to. Living with Robin in a tiny two bedroom apartment has been really, really fun, and Steve’s made some new friends, friends who don’t share his nightmares - and they are good, superficial friendships, exactly the way Steve wants. 

Things have definitely changed for Steve in the last few years. For starters, he hasn’t gotten into a fight or had a single bruise on his face ever since he left home. The nightmares, flinching, and flashbacks though - well. He doesn’t think they’ll go away completely, but it’s been so much better as of late, easier and faster for him to push through, and he sometimes even gets two full nights of sleep consecutively. That’s surely a win. 

Sometimes, Steve wonders if anyone from home could even recognize him. He’s lost a lot of muscles, his workout routine now only involving lifting stacks of books. His hair is much shorter now, the back of his neck completely bare these days, but the top of his head is still coiffed for his bangs to fall down effortlessly over his forehead; it still looks pretty good, as Robin always tells him, though it’s not as extravagant and full of ego as his former moniker suggested. This, of course, is by design; Steve does not want to stand out, or be particularly memorable. He’d even thrown out all of his polos from his high school days, opting rather for a simple T-shirt for most days, and his Members Only jacket is probably collecting dust inside Dustin’s closet at the moment (if that little shrimp still kept it for some reason). The only items from his old wardrobe that he’d brought with him were his jeans, because those were expensive, and now he’s got a budget as tight as his favorite pair of Levi’s. 

The biggest difference in Steve’s appearance, he thinks, is the addition of glasses for which he started to feel the need in the first semester of College. Having to wear glasses felt both like an end of an era and simultaneously a new beginning for his identity. Gone was King Steve, the Jockiest of Jocks; now, here in College, he’s just plain old Steve with hidden scars and unspeakable secrets, just like everyone else. Although - Steve doubts that there are too many others here who’d encountered interdimensional creatures and underground Russian spies.

Now in his final year of college - Steve’s not kidding himself anymore. Ever since he’s chosen to major in psychology, it’s become more and more obvious to him that all this change is his defense mechanism - a wall of sorts for him to hide behind - just like how his King Steve persona had been a compensation for his insecurities and loneliness. King Steve served his purpose for the time he was needed; now, in college, Plain Old Steve helps him avoid the attention, popularity, and all the bullshit that comes with reputation and money. Not that the money was ever actually Steve’s. He makes his own living now, his own boundaries, and enjoys his freedom and the quiet. And quiet is good. Working at the library has been perfect for this reason. 

The thing about the quiet life is, though, is that it’s just really quiet. It’s actually really fucking boring, if he’s honest. But still, it’s slow enough that he could do his assignments at the circulation desk, and he’s being paid for his time. Yea, he shouldn’t complain. It’s a great deal. It allows him to live a relatively normal life, being a college student and shit. If the cataloging and shelf-reading and all that desk job shit is a little repetitive, it kind of helps Steve forget about how bored and restless he is. It helps him feel productive, like he’s doing something useful without being challenged too much. God knows how many brain cells he’s lost from those last couple of years back in Hawkins. He needs glasses now to see things, for fuck’s sake.

But, the questions, goddamn it, the fucking questions these kids bring to the circ. This is his fourth year working at the library, and he’s just getting tired, so much that he almost wishes for something insane to happen. 

Steve doesn’t know what he was expecting for this brand-new, three-story library for math and sciences - colloquially known as the ‘science library’ - but since the inventory here is specifically for those fields, things are even slower here than at the main library, especially without Robin working right next to him. Steve wants to feel something again, something that gets his adrenaline going. Maybe less mind-boggling monster bullshit - but something a little bit more than “where can I find books about starting a fire” (excuse me, what?) or “can you please tell the couple downstairs to shut the fuck up?” (and Steve had to go down to tell a pair of horny teens to get a room elsewhere) or “uh, why can’t I find this book?” (because it was released a month ago and they didn’t get a fucking chance to stock it yet, it’s on their list, hold your goddamn horses).

For some reason, they only ask him the most mundane of questions when Steve’s actually busy at work. Once or twice, some girls (rare sighting in this particular library, Steve begins to notice) had come up to the circ to ask if he had the time, and Steve had misinterpreted it as a come-on, then sheepishly just pointed at the clock behind him when he realized that they weren’t asking him out. It was a big fucking clock, totally unmissable. The university has this ugly ass clock in every building in every single room. They must’ve placed a mass order of the same clock and distributed it everywhere. There’s some comfort in its ugliness, though; at least this clock is entirely monotone, and there’s no room for any interpretations other than just the time. The blue does not meet yellow in the west. Steve can live with that. 

-

So, on the last Friday of September when he hears a dude ask “hey, where did the clock go?” that breaks Steve’s razor-sharp focus on the catalogs - you know, it annoys him a little. He was on such a roll. Now he’s lost his rhythm. Damn it.

Steve subtly rolls his eyes and turns his revolving chair around to look at the clock. Or rather, where the clock should be. In its place, a lonely nail sticks out on the wall, markedly without the said clock. Hmm. Seriously, where the hell did it go? Question for the office later. Glancing at his wristwatch, Steve flatly announces, “I guess we have no clock. I’m your clock now. It’s… 12:03,” and turns around to look at the asker’s face, then immediately tears his eyes away. He seriously may burn to a crisp if he stares any longer, it’s like looking directly into the sun, because fuck, dude is pretty.

Steve’s never seen this guy before in the library, main or science, nor around the campus. Granted, there are literally thousands of students enrolled at this school, and it’s only been a month at this specific desk, but still, this is unacceptable - and the dude knows that the clock is missing, so he’s been here before, familiar with the goddamn clock’s location and everything. So how come Steve has never seen him here before? Now that is the real question. 

He cautiously looks up at the dude again, slowly. Dude’s stupidly big dark-brown eyes stare back at him, and he’s tapping on the counters with his multi-ring-clad fingers. Dude has really nice hands.

“Oh! You’re my clock now, huh? This is great news. I much prefer you than the clock, fuck the clock. I’d believe you even if you told me it was 4 in the morning… Anyway, I can use your stapler and stuff, right?” Clock Dude smiles, holding a stack of papers. Dude has dimples in his cheeks - dimples - and Steve decides that maybe he does want to stare directly into the sun, and fuck the consequences.

“Uh, yes, everything there’s for everyone, so,” Steve says in monotone, feeling his face getting warm. He carefully brushes his bangs to the right and watches Clock Dude slide down the counter with a “thanks, babe,” and fuss around with the papers. Dude’s arms are sprinkled with tattoos and, hold on, he totally has a wristwatch himself. Then why - ? 

No. Steve is not going to question him, not going to call him out at all. Dude called him babe. Steve’s earlier endeavors at cataloging are completely forgotten. Now all that matters in the world is observing the way that Dude grabs the stapler and sliding the pages in between, his eyes locking with Steve’s again as he clamps down with a smile. 

“Uh - hang on,” Clock dude says, straining hard as he puts his weight on the stapler again, again, and again. His curly hair, tied up in a messy ponytail, bounces every time he clamps down on it. The stapler shouldn’t need that much force, although being over the top could just be Clock Dude’s default manner. But the upper left hand corner of his paper comes away without staples each time. 

Ugh, of course. Steve knows exactly what’s going on. The office supplies in the library aren’t in a great shape in general—the stapler in particular. It either doesn’t have enough staples, or it has to be yanked opened and adjusted to function properly. Steve’s just replenished the staples that morning, so it has to be the latter issue.

Dude has given up and now is giving Steve help me eyes with a pout. It makes Steve a little giddy, but. Steve didn’t get his reputation for being entirely transparent. Steve Harrington is supposed to be a smooth fucking charmer, even with these nerdy ass glasses, even without the Hair. All he has to do is pretend like he doesn’t care and give a practiced sigh, which he executes beautifully, feeling a little smug about it as he fixes the goddamn stapler. 

“There.” He hands back Dude’s perfectly stapled paper, though the corner of the pages is indented with Dude’s earlier attempts.

“Whoa! Thanks. Are you now my clock and a stapler?” Clock Dude’s grin widens as he shrugs off his backpack, and - okay, maybe it was a mistake to move too close to the edge of the counters, because now Steve can see Dude’s entire outfit, and his jaw drops. Dude’s black band T-shirt - which reads Metallica Tour 88-89 with a bunch of city names and dates - is cropped. Several inches of Dude’s bare midriff are visible, just like that, out in the open. Dude’s torso is lean and toned, and there’s an edge of a tattoo poking out from the end of the shirt, and if Steve’s sight isn’t fucking with him, another one around the V of his pelvic bone, just above his black jeans. Holy shit. If he felt a little warmer in his face earlier, he is now 200% certain that he’s blushing. 

Dude follows Steve’s gaze to the bottom half of his stomach - where the rest of the shirt should’ve been - and smirks. Fuck.

“Hello? Eyes up here, sweetheart,” he snaps his fingers in front of Steve.

“Uh-what?” Steve says, a bit dazed, reeling from the cropped top and Dude’s pet names for him. Not that Steve’s been counting. It’s infuriating how hot this guy is, and he almost forgets what Dude said earlier - oh, right - “Sorry. Uh. Yea. Stapler, clock, I can be whatever you need me to be, if you, uh. If you need anything else,” Steve manages, trying to keep his voice steady and cool. He’s not going to focus on how it sounded the opposite of steady and cool, no siree.

Dude pauses a second at this comment. “No, but good to know,” he says, tapping the pages on the counter to straighten them (why on Earth would he do this? The paper is already stapled, you can’t straighten them anymore), and put them in his backpack.

“Are you - are you checking out anything?” Steve asks, cringing inwards as he detects desperation in his tone - but he’s secretly hoping to scan Clock Dude’s ID in the system. This is a very, very inappropriate idea, he knows. But when he scans someone’s ID to check out an item, the screen would show their general information, like their full name, address, phone number, and their status as a student, their major, what they’ve already checked out, and whether they’ve got any overdue items. Stuff like that. It’s just like Family Video’s user account records.

Or - Steve could also just ask his name casually without scanning. That’s a normal thing to do, right? It’s just being friendly. You know. Would you like to go on a curiosity voyage with me? I’ll be your guide and paddles, I’m Steve Harrington - ugh, no. That’s totally what Dustin would say, and Steve immediately shuts down that idea. 

“Huh. Well, I guess I am. Not any books though, not today. Just—the clock,” Dude says with a cheeky grin. Then he leaves the library without another word.

Steve sits back in his chair, blinking hard. 

Continue reading on Ao3

[purlturtle]

Bering and Wells Advent Calendar, Day 15

Never Get Involved With Your Flatmate, a collaborative writing event: everyone writes one chapter of a loosely connected getting together AU!

Here's my contribution for Day 15:

#15: never listen in on Helena talking on the phone

Not only is it rude, but one might overhear things - but oh, how hard that is, when the listened-in-on person has such a pretty voice!

(fic is under the readmore, or on AO3 if you want! The whole AO3 collection is here!)

Myka tries to never listen in on people. It is rude, and whatever they are talking about is none of her business.

However.

When someone talks, somewhere where you can hear it, and there’s no other sound to focus on instead – what are you going to do? Plugging your ears is a childish gesture, turning on your own noise is impolite – so you just pretend, right? Do your best not to imply what is being said on the other side of the phone call, the one you can’t hear; do your best not to judge what you do hear.

Anyone who works in the hospitality industry has their experience with that.

Anyone who works out of an office that has very thin walls, and other offices on the other sides of those walls, has their experiences with that.

It’s been two weeks now, and Myka really should say something.

Then again, it’s not really her office, not as such; just a room equipped with a desk and a generic computer that plenty of people use when they need to, such as her when she plans the menu, or checks on contracts with service providers, or sends out orders to purveyors. (She’s good at this, too. Before she began working here, doing this was “kind of everyone’s job”, as Artie had mumbled when he’d hired her, and “kind of everyone’s job” always meant “nobody’s doing it because everybody thinks someone else has already done it”, and god, it was a mess, but she has cleaned that up now and it is running so smoothly, if she says so herself.)

Anyway, office. She uses it, like, maybe an hour or two every day. Helena uses hers, next door, far more – not the entire day; she spends plenty of time outside of it, but it is accurate to call it “Helena’s office” in a way that it would never be accurate to call this one “Myka’s office”. This office is empty plenty of times, and Myka always makes sure to look in on Helena, say hello when she comes to use it, so that Helena will know someone is next door. So it’s not like she’s setting Helena up for being listened in on. And she’s had phone calls come in when Helena was next door; Helena has to know how thin these walls are, and how sound carries.

And she tries, she really does, but—

But Helena’s voice is just so pretty.

And there are so many variants of it.

There’s her “customer service voice” – well, they all have that, but then there’s also her “extra super British voice” when someone American gets on her nerves, her “talking to Artie” voice, her “talking to the IT guy” voice (and jargon), her “talking to hotel staff voice” (it’s way less formal, and way less British, and, to her credit, in no way patronizing). And at home, she talks differently yet again, just in general, and then on top of that there’s how she speaks with Steve and Leena: calm and friendly, Claudia: excited and tech-y, Pete: chummy but surprisingly stern sometimes, and… well, and Myka hasn’t exactly figured out whether Helena talks differently to her, and if so, how. It’s not like she, maybe, potentially, has already been analyzing this far too much already.

Except—

Myka knows, now how Helena’s voice sounds when it’s reading poetry out loud. She knows, now, the range Helena’s voice truly has. And at first she wondered, if… if, when Helena reads poetry, she always sounds like that, or… or only if she reads poetry to Myka. There’s no way of telling, really, seeing as she only has that one example to go off of. What wouldn’t she give, to hear Helena read again—

No. No, she has made a rule about that. No more poetry, no more reading out loud to her. She won’t survive it, and that’s that.

The truth of the matter is, though, that she has learned to tell, just from hearing Helena’s half of the conversation, who might be on the other end of the phone line.

And she should be embarrassed about that, really she should, but it is also so incredibly fascinating.

She likes it best when Helena talks to the IT guy, because apparently Helena isn’t just a genius with old heaters and modern DVD players, but also with the hotel’s idiosyncratic computer system. Those calls went from initial curiosity to disbelief to a brief period of despair and truly impressive cursing, to – as of the beginning of this week – exchanges that are so rapid-fire and cut-off sentences and delighted laughter that you might believe that Helena and the IT guy share a brainwave. If you were listening in.

And that is…

Nobody understands Hugo, okay?

Not even Artie understands Hugo, and they have worked together longest. Claudia has long given up on understanding Hugo, saying it’s like Python versus Java, and while Myka knows enough to know that Claudia isn’t talking about snakes and coffee, that’s about the extent of her knowledge, so she has even less hope of understanding Hugo.

And here’s Helena, faced with Hugo and Artie and their byzantine computer system for all of two weeks, and delighted laughter is happening when she talks to Hugo. Granted, not when she talks to Artie, but then Artie isn’t “just” the IT guy, Artie is the manager, and has way different stakes in the whole thing than Hugo does – Myka isn’t even sure that Hugo knows he’s working for a hotel. It’s magic – Myka doesn’t know if it’s the accent, or Helena’s voice, or the way she says things, but she understands Hugo and Hugo understands her.

It is magic.

Myka doesn’t have to talk to Hugo often, but the few times she’s done so, she came away not sure if he actually understood a single thing she told him, or vice versa. So, maybe, listening to Helena talk to him isn’t all that bad? It’s practically research!

So when Helena’s phone rings, on the other side of the thin office wall, on this gray, sleet-filled Friday afternoon, Myka saves the document she’s been working on, and tilts her head to the side.

“Charles! You rotten old muffler; about time I heard from you!”

Oh, that is new. That is new. That is not the IT guy greeting. That’s not even Helena’s usual English.

“Oh dreadful, darling, simply awful. Not even a good proper rain, but this truly exasperating mix of rain and snow and ice; good thing I live right next door – yeah, didn’t I tell you? Extremely handy, and such lovely people—”

Myka almost loses her balance on her chair – whoever Helena is talking to (whoever she is calling “darling” like that, part of her mind adds darkly), whoever this Charles is to her, she’s about to tell him about Myka. Well, about everyone who she lives with, of course, but Myka is among that number, and she really really shouldn’t be listening in.

“Wha—?”

Apparently, Helena was interrupted; there’s a lengthy pause only filled by a few “oh dear”s and “goodness”es and such. And then when Helena goes on, she’s commiserating with whatever this Charles has told her just now, consoling – and thoroughly tearing into some “James” and “Marcus” characters that apparently did this Charles wrong somehow. And she sounds… different. Myka has no idea of different English accents and dialects beyond knowing that they exist, just as Texan American is different from Coloradoan. But this must be one of them, and now Myka wonders where in England Helena is from, and if everybody there sounds like that, and how come Helena doesn’t sound like that at other times, and—

Helena’s vowels and consonants, the entire melody of her words has entirely changed; her diction is softer on some sounds, even more crisp on others, stringing her words together with barely a breath in between, drawing out a sound here and swallowing one there, it is… it is fascinating, and Myka can’t help but think that this is Helena at her least guarded, and that she really, really, really should stop listening in.

It is… it sounds… it’s intimate, is the word Myka’s brain lands on, and she winces. It is, though. She would swear that this is a voice of Helena’s that few get to hear, only someone really close to her. Like her poetry voice, her brain pipes up, and she winces again, and wonders who else ever got to hear that, and why she’s feeling so oddly possessive all of a sudden, wanting the answer to be “only Myka Bering”. She wonders if there will ever be a time when Helena will talk to her the way she talks to this Charles, and then does her best to wipe that thought from her mind, because there is no way that anything good will come from that. She will stick to her rules, and she will stop listening in, and—

“What about me?” Helena asks, as if she’s repeating a question this Charles has just put to her. There’s a laugh in there, somewhere – all of her interaction with this Charles, so far, speak of great familiarity. And as Helena launches into a description of what her job is here in the hotel, Myka’s stomach plummets – what if this Charles is Helena’s partner, boyfriend, significant other? Sure, she’s not wearing a ring, but that doesn’t necessarily mean she’s single, does it?

But then… but she did look at Myka’s lips, the other day, after that second poem. She did; Myka remembers that. (It totally hasn’t burned itself into her retinas, that glance, no, nah, haha no, just… just a memory. Like anyone might have. Very mundane and normal.) That’s not… looking at someone’s lips like that is not what someone does who has someone else on the other side of the Atlantic waiting for them. Or is it? No, Helena wouldn’t. Would she? The simple truth is, Myka doesn’t know. The simple truth is, there are more “darling”s being dropped in this phone call she’s listening to, and either that’s what Helena calls everyone and Myka isn’t special (and oh, how she hates that idea), or this Charles and Myka are on an equal tier of special, and Myka wants to know what that tier is, burns to know what that tier is, but she can’t go and ask, can she, not without revealing that she listened in, and that will lead to Helena knowing that Myka can always listen in if she hasn’t realized it yet, and—

“Do stop, Charles – yes, alright, fine, yes, there is someone who— No, I’m not going to tell you more, you sordid vulture. There isn’t anything to tell, all right? … Oh you and I both know that my approach is—” There is a very indelicate snort, and then, “But quantity isn’t quality, dearest brother,” and Myka can suddenly breathe so much more easily, it’s remarkable, really.

Brother.

He’s Helena’s brother.

“No, Charles,” and that is very stern, and Myka wonders if Helena is the older or the younger of the two; she would definitely talk to Tracy this way, but then Tracy would also definitely try to talk to Myka this way. “I am not going t— Yes, all right, I am interested, but— No, you are not going to get a picture of—”

Yeah, okay, that withering scorn, that is siblings talking, Myka can hear it now. Charles is teasing Helena, and Helena isn’t having it. She can also tell that the more indignant Helena gets, the more… proper her pronunciation sounds again. The thing is… it sounds very much as if Charles is teasing Helena about… someone. Someone that Helena is interested in.

Myka’s heart is beating in her throat. Could it be—?

But perhaps it isn’t. Perhaps she’s imagining things. Misunderstanding that half-heard conversation.

Mustn’t do that.

Myka’s phone rings.

She stares at it, and in the silence right after the ring, she can… she can hear Helena winding up her phone call to Charles.

That’s a coincidence, right?

It can’t be that…

That Helena—

That Helena wants to listen to Myka, can it?

No, probably – probably Helena wants to end her call so she can, she can leave her office and give Myka some privacy, just like Myka should have done ten minutes ago. Damn.

Her phone rings again, and Myka scrambles for the receiver. “Hello?”

“Myka?”

Tracy. Now that is the weirdest coincidence, seriously. “Yes, Tracy,” Myka sighs, propping her head into her palm.

“Yes, hi, insert two small talk questions here; Myka, I am going to kill our mother.”

Myka bites back a snort. “You volunteered to spend Christmas with them, Trace.”

“Oh spare me the ‘you only have yourself to blame’ litany, little Miss Airfares Are Too Expensive Around The Holidays.” Tracy groans, long and pitiful. “Can you call Mom and tell her to just stick with a Christmas dinner list already? I swear this is the fifth time that she’s sent me a recipe that ‘sounds so amazing for Christmas, don’t you think, Tracy?!’” Her imitation of Jeannie Bering is spot-on, if a little cruel. “I don’t care! I cannot begin to describe how little I care! I just want a shopping list, ideally with a four-day lead-up to be able to pre-order that shit, and not go anywhere near any store after the twenty-third. I’m eight months pregnant, for chrissakes!”

“I know, Trace,” Myka says, not unkindly, though she does bite back a comment about how Tracy is just as pregnant as she needs to be to get out of shit she doesn’t want to do. “And you know I’d come, but it’s not just the airfares, it’s our busiest time too. I’ll be there for New Year’s, remember?”

“And what a coincidence that New Year’s dinner is just a bunch of buffalo wings,” Tracy says acerbically.

“Exactly.” Myka isn’t going to get into this with Tracy; they’ve been having this conversation for years, ever since Myka started working here. “And I make a damn good satay sauce for them, if I say so myself.” Every year the same one, too; she knows that that shopping list is magnet-tacked to her parents’ fridge, and sits in her sister’s inbox too.

Tracy groans again. “My phone just dinged again. Myka, I swear to god, if this is another recipe—”

“You’ll be fine, Tracy,” Myka tells her. “Just tell her about the twenty-third deadline, and stick with it.” She doesn’t add “for once”; if Tracy doesn’t know by now how to set a boundary, Myka sees dark times ahead of her for motherhood. Speaking of: “How’s the baby-baking going?”

“Ugh,” Tracy groans, yet again. “I feel like a zeppelin. Like the fucking Marshmallow Man. Kevin has been taking everything off every countertop and side table and even the center of the dinner table; I hate him. Might kill him too. And Dad, completionism and all that.”

“Don’t kill family at Christmas, Trace; think of the police officers who want to be home with their families, not investigating murders.”

Tracy blows a raspberry. “Fuck ‘em,” she says brightly.

Myka swallows a guffaw; Tracy has enthusiastically embraced the “all cops are bastards” mindset –mostly because Tracy hates following rules, though, and consequently also hates the enforcers of said rules. “Give Kevin my best,” Myka says solemnly, “and tell him to hide the knives and the rat poison.”

Tracy scoffs. “As if I’d resort to that.” Then she huffs a theatrical breath. “Anyway, call Mom.”

“Anyway, call her yourself,” Myka replies. “I’m staying out of that. You’re an adult, Trace, remember?” Oh, how Tracy had thrown that argument around after her eighteenth birthday.

Tracy’s reply is another raspberry. “Gotta pee,” she says then, “see you soon.”

“Bye, Trace,” Myka says, but the line is already dead.

She wonders what Helena might have gleaned from this, if she really did listen in. There’s only silence in the office on the other side of the wall; she can’t even hear Helena type (yes, the walls are that thin). Maybe Helena did leave, to give Myka some privacy? Should she, Myka, do that too? (Yes, she should have done it fifteen minutes ago, but she can’t very well change the past now, can she?)

And then she hears Helena’s chair creak and knows that no, Helena is still there, just quiet. She must have heard Myka talk about family killings and knives and rat poison.

Myka blushes, fiercely. No more listening to phone calls, she tells herself. Maybe karma will help, if she stops listening to Helena’s phone calls, that Helena will also not happen to overhear Myka talking to her little sister about familicide.

She wonders if her own voice sounded different, talking to her sister.

She wonders if Helena wonders whether Myka will ever talk to her, Helena, the way she just talked to her sister. Then she realizes that from her, Myka’s, half of the conversation, Helena has no way of knowing that Myka was talking to her sister. And then she makes a firm mental note not to let slip that she now knows that Helena has a brother called Charles.

And then she makes another firm note, to stop listening in to those phone calls. Maybe get some earplugs. Or put her headphones in and listen to music while she works. Or just leave the office and find something else to do.

She shushes the part of her mind that says she’ll miss Helena’s voice. She’ll still hear it in the evenings, and mornings too. It’ll be fine.

[saiilorstars]

Ch.14: The Final Line 

Steve Rogers x OFC fic • squeeze your eyes for a Bucky Barnes x (2nd) OFC

taglist: @ocappreciationtag​​​​​​​​​​​​ @arrthurpendragon​​​​​​​​​​​ @anotherunreadblog​​​​​​​​​​​ @maaaaarveeeeel​​​​​​​​​​​ @stareyedplanet​​​​​​​​​​​ @gloryekaterina​​​ @averyhotchner​​​ @foxesandmagic​​​​​​​​​​​​ @lenonizi @kmc1989​​​​​​​​​​​​

Story Masterlist • Seren’s Masterlist• Chloe’s Masterlist​​

Also available on Fanfic ○ Ao3 ○ Wattpad

If you’d like to be a part of this OC’s work/edits, let me know!

"We're going to start talking strategies in a bit...if you're interested..." Natasha stood by the doorway of the room Seren had recused herself to. It was as shabby as the rest of the rooms in the base.

"If it involves Fury, then I can't be sure he won't try to do something in the shadows," Seren retorted, turning around to Natasha. "He might just let Chloe die for the 'bigger picture'."

"He wouldn't let that happen, Seren."

"He was prepared to shoot me down when Loki brainwashed me," Seren snapped. It all made perfect sense now. She was always so blind focusing solely on the mission that she never considered what was going on behind it. "Everyone at SHIELD is disposable, Natasha. Everyone. I finally got that. Me, you, Steve, Chloe...if we're in the way of the bigger picture, we're disposable."

"Dial back the identity crisis before you really hurt your head," Natasha said.

"It's not funny, Natasha. This is something truly hurtful to realize and, yes, I know it took me forever to realize it. It's my fault for being so blind."

"You weren't 'blind', you were just painfully optimistic," Natasha flashed Seren a little smile. "You have and will always look for the brighter side of things. It's in your nature. Always has been."

"Making me stupid," Seren said with a huff. "Honestly, I should be taking lessons from you. You don't even seem affected by everything we've learned."

"Seren, the things I have seen and done in my life make this whole thing just another passing-by situation for me. Does it affect me that SHIELD turned out to be another red room? Yeah, of course it does. But in the grand scheme of everything, it's not the worst thing that's happened to me."

"You came up with that yourself?" Seren said, slightly unconvinced. Natasha chuckled.

"Steve may have had a hand in the realization."

Seren playfully rolled her eyes. "Of course."

"For what it's worth, real or not, you have always done the best damn job for SHIELD."

Seren lowered her head. She used to like thinking the same thing. "Except now I wonder when I was doing my best for HYDRA, and how much of their agenda I helped push through."

"I wouldn't do that...it's not going to lead you to better thoughts."

"But how do I do that, Natasha? How do I stop wondering when the bad guy was actually the good guy and when the good guy was actually the bad guy?" Seren rubbed her forehead. "I keep thinking about it and I feel horrible. How do I make it stop?"

"By not holding yourself responsible for what was out of your control!" Natasha exclaimed. "You're suffocating in senseless guilt. It's not your fault. You didn't know that HYDRA still existed. None of us did! Not even Fury!"

"He should have said something, Natasha," Seren muttered.

"Maybe, but then what? We were outnumbered, girl. He played the cards he had; they weren't the best cards but it is what it is."

"So I'm supposed to forgive and forget?"

"That's up to you, Seren," Natasha shrugged. "Right now, I just think that we should pull our numbers together and get Winters the hell out of there."

Seren sighed. "Yeah, that...that would be a good idea. I just don't think I can follow Fury this time."

"Then don't," Natasha said like it was obvious what she should do. Apparently, Seren didn't know that it was obvious so Natasha helped. "You've led a ton of missions. You led the Avengers. Do it again."

Seren didn't hate the idea...in fact, it sounded right up her alley.

~ 0 ~

"We have to stop the launch," Steve had said just as Natasha had led Seren into the room. He was grateful with Natasha, and relieved that Seren was more or less alright. It seemed like he was running out of words to comfort her with and so this time he thought maybe Natasha would be better suited to persuade her to return.

"I don't think the Council's accepting my calls anymore," Fury sarcastically said. With a lot of help, he had moved over to a chair and reached over for a case at the edge of a table. He pulled it open to reveal three chips inside.

"What's that?" Sam couldn't help but look at them warily.

"Once the Helicarriers reach three thousand feet, they'll triangulate with Insight satellites becoming fully weaponized," Maria explained.

"We need to breach those carriers and replace their targeting blades with our own," added Fury.

"One or two won't cut it. We need to link all three carriers for this to work, because if even one of those ships remains operational, a whole lot of people are gonna die."

"We have to assume everyone aboard those carriers is HYDRA. We need to get pass them, insert the server blades, and maybe, just maybe, we can salvage what's left—"

"We are not salvaging anything," Seren's hard voice cut Fury off. Everyone's head turned in her direction but the only person she was looking at was Fury. "We're not just going to take down those carriers, we're going to take down everything, SHIELD included.

"SHIELD had nothing to do with it!" Fury argued.

"How do you know!?" Seren countered. "You yourself said you never knew who was HYDRA and who was SHIELD. The only sensible thing is to bring it all down. And we will, because there is no way I'm going to help if that's not the plan."

Fury looked like he couldn't believe it. "Seren—"

"There's no other way, Fury," Seren reiterated. "Because even if, somehow, we managed to pluck out every single HYDRA agent from that building, where's our guarantee that there's no other HYDRA agents in the other SHIELD bases, hm? Have we even thought about that? About all the other bases around the country?" By the silence, it was clear that the answer was no. "I'm not letting honest SHIELD agents work alongside HYDRA for another single day! It's all coming down!" The second round of silence was actually rather loud and for a split second Seren wondered if she'd crossed the line.

"I agree." Steve unintentionally brought her some relief. He was already looking at her when she glanced his way. He stood firm on his choice and he hoped that she would stick to hers without fear.

Seren nodded her thanks to him then looked over at Natasha to see what she was going to do. She gave a tilt of her head and her usual smile. Seren then looked at Sam.

"I do what you guys do, just slower," he said, "And I'm not going anywhere until we get Chloe back."

"I think she's right, Fury," Maria said, surprising the others. Even she looked tired of it all.

Seren smiled, more than relieved with the support of her friends. She set eyes on Fury again and walked up to him. "It's going down," she said with finality. "So right now, you are going to tell us everything you know that you haven't told us. And I mean every thing. About the secret projects, the inaccessible files, but more importantly everything about Chloe's file." After a moment of hesitance, she added one more thing. "And everything about Sergeant Barnes."

"Look, I didn't know about Barnes, alright?" Fury retorted.

"Even if you had, would you have told us?" Steve said, and walked up to him as well. "Or would you have compartmentalized that too?"

Fury was at a loss between Steve and Seren. Neither one of them was backing down.

~0~

"You know it would've been wise to go down for a nap or something," Seren's voice reached Steve seconds before she did.

He looked away from the river to see her coming down the bridge. He'd disappeared shortly after finalizing their plans inside.

"I could say the same thing for you," he said when she came to stand beside him.

"Ooh no, I am done sleeping," Seren said. She watched the river for a minute, actually envying how calm and peaceful it looked. It made her realize she had never truly experienced those phenomena. She was always...working. "Steve, if I had known...if I had ever had a doubt that...that he could've been..." she looked up at him, "I would have said something. I swear."

Her worries lessened as a warm smile spread across Steve's face. He met her gaze and nodded. "I know. You were never like the others. Knew that from the start." Seren flushed with his look. "I just can't believe I never noticed."

"How could you?" Seren said. "You only just started working with SHIELD—"

"Two years ago, Seren. And that was on top of the time before I got to work." Steve shook his head. The more he thought about all the time he wasted while Bucky was out there suffering made his blood boil. He was angry at himself for being so blind and...naive. "I was doing all the wrong things..."

"No, you weren't," Seren said gently. She sensed the underlying anger in his voice and honestly couldn't blame him. She felt exactly the same when she thought about Chloe. "You were adjusting to your trauma, to your situation. Even if you had known about Bucky, you wouldn't have been in any condition to go look for him. You needed that time to get better — you deserved that time."

"Maybe...but it doesn't change what Bucky went through in the meantime..." said Steve, and for that he would never forgive himself. "I got lucky. I was asleep for 70 years. I can't even begin to imagine what those years were like for him."

Seren rubbed a comforting hand on his arm. Working through that mentality would take a lot of time, but she would be right there with him helping him get through it.

"I-I know that it's hard to believe it after that fight but...that wasn't Bucky, not the one that I knew. The real him..." Steve looked down at Seren again, feeling an overwhelming urge to explain who his best friend truly was, "He would never hurt anyone, Seren."

"I know—"

"He was kind—"

"I know—"

"—and helpful—"

"Steve, I know," Seren said with a soft smile. "You don't have to tell me twice. I believe you. I swear."

Steve moved his arm down to wrap around her waist. "Bucky wasn't like a brother, he was...is." He would have to get used to that now. He always talked about his life in the past tense, including those he thought he left behind. "To know that all this time he's been alive and brainwashed…"

"We're going to get him out," Seren said to him. "Him, and Chloe. We're going to get them out. I don't know how but we're going to."

"Question is, will either of you be able to fight them?" Sam regretted making his presence known in this way but he didn't think anyone else would have the courage to ask the question. So far, no one had. The pair looked over at him with similar pained expressions. "Listen, I've talked to Chloe plenty to know her so me fighting her already feels challenging. And I just met her. I can't imagine what it must feel like to both of you."

"Hard," Seren said, "But we'll manage."

"Will you?" Sam raised an eyebrow at them. "What if they already put that other chip in her head or wherever it needs to go? What if she's already brainwashed like Barnes? She will shoot to kill. We already know Barnes will definitely kill us if he gets the chance. I hate to be the one to tell you this but you cannot go easy on them by any means."

"We get it, Sam, we do," Steve said quietly, "But we're going to do our best to try and save them."

"Chloe might have a chance but I don't know about Barnes, to tell you the truth," Sam said. "After decades of brainwashing, he might be the guy that needs to be stopped rather than saved.

"I understand what you're saying but we can't abandon them," Steve said. He already left Bucky for dead decades ago, he was not walking away this time. "I'm going to do what it takes. Even if it takes a long time to get there."

"Alright," Sam nodded. He had said what he needed to. "So when do we go?"

"Now," Steve replied. "Gear up."

"What, and you're gonna wear that?"

For a moment, Steve actually chuckled. "No. If you're gonna fight a war, you gotta wear a uniform."

"Well, my suit's probably already been destroyed at S.H.I.E.L.D," Seren said, although she didn't sound very upset about the matter. "You know I never even got a say in the design? SHIELD just did it for me and that was that. Just one more thing it took from me. I'll get a normal one from the base."

~0~

The entry into the Triskelion wasn't that difficult. Because everyone was busy looking for them outside of it, no one ever really thought about checking inside their own walls first. Before they would actually put a stop to Project Insight, they thought they should at least give those Agents still working humbly a chance to choose their side after hearing the truth about S.H.I.E.L.D. Seren had faith that they would choose the right side. They had just reached the door when it opened for them, almost like fate, and a young tech guy nearly crashed into the group.

"Excuse us," Steve promptly said before leading the way inside. The others walked in behind him with the exception of Seren.

She lingered behind to address the entire room. "It would bode well for you all not to activate any alarms," she warned with a serious face. "Just listen. That's all we want." She put a finger over her lips. "Listen."

Because in the next couple of minutes, Steve had taken over the entire communications system. "Attention, all SHIELD agents. This is Steve Rogers. You've heard a lot about me over the last few days, some of you were even ordered to hunt me down. But I think it's time you know the truth. SHIELD is not what we thought it was, it's been taken over by HYDRA…"

The room had gone absolutely still. Seren, Maria and Sam looked around to see which techies were looking guilty and which ones were looking afraid. The latter were the ones they would try to help.

"...Alexander Pierce is their leader. The STRIKE and Insight crew are HYDRA as well. I don't know how many more, but I know they're in the building. They could be standing right next to you. They almost have what they want: absolute control. They shot Nick Fury and it won't end there. If you launch those Helicarriers today, HYDRA will be able to kill anyone that stands in their way, unless we stop them. I know I'm asking a lot, but the price of freedom is high, it always has been, and it's a price I'm willing to pay. And if I'm the only one, then so be it. But I'm willing to bet I'm not."

Steve let the communications go and waited, though for what he wasn't quite sure. Maybe it was more to catch his breath for what was going to come in the next couple of minutes.

"Did you write that down first, or was it off the top of your head?" Sam came to ask him, earning just a small smile in return.

Seren stalked her way up to the closest technician and grabbed him by the lapels of his shirt. "Winters. Where is she?"

"I-I don't know!"

"There hasn't been any sign of Chloe around here!?"

"I—no! Nothing!"

"Seren!" Steve called to her, frankly unsurprised with the abrupt manner she was 'questioning' the poor man with. If he could, he would probably do the same thing to find Bucky...but he had a feeling that Bucky would be finding him very soon instead.

Seren let go of the man and stepped back. "I need to find Chloe."

"C'mon," Steve motioned her to the doors. He held his hand out for her. They would go find Chloe together.

Seren came over to take his hand, squeezing it as soon as she could, and headed out with him. Sam followed behind while Maria stayed behind to man the controls. It was easy getting out to the Helicarriers but that was probably going to be the last easy thing they did for the day.

"Not one sign of Chloe," Seren was fiercely looking on either side of them. "Not even Bucky. What do you think they're waiting for? HYDRA must have given Bucky the order to kill already, but what about Chloe?"

"I'd rather not think about the mechanics of those plans..." Steve admitted. If he allowed himself to think about the many reasons why they were lacking in their presence, he would spiral and he wouldn't be able to focus on their plans.

"Okay, now wait a minute," Sam said once he saw the Helicarriers in sight, "Before we split up and all, how do we know the good guys from the bad guys? We haven't exactly identified them yet."

Steve had the perfect response. "If they're shooting at you, they're bad."

Sam deadpanned Steve for a second. "Oh, funny guy." He activated the wings of his suit and flew into the air.

"That was pretty funny," Seren said afterwards with a little smile.

"We'll discuss my 'funny' afterwards," Steve said, turning to her, serious. "You need to be careful, alright?"

"I know," Seren nodded, swallowing hard. "It's going to be tough fighting familiar faces, but if they're HYDRA then they'll need to be careful." She raised her fists that were already glowing with power.

Steve could smile at that. It was surreal fighting HYDRA all over again but this time he could believe that things would end very differently. Last time had an era of disadvantage, whether he wanted to admit it or not. Today, they had better weapons and technology backing them up, and a lot more knowledge. Plus, he also had one magnificent star with him this time.

"Gotta run," Seren said but then shook her head, "Or fly, I guess?"

"Fly," Steve said. He wondered when, oh when, would it stop being weird saying that so easily.

Seren nodded and, like Sam, jumped into the air (sans the wings). Steve watched after her for a few seconds until he ultimately decided that it would never stop being weird watching someone fly.

He hopped off the ledge and landed on the lower deck. Very quickly he had to run for cover as HYDRA agents spotted him and began firing. He ran behind a crate only to find another agent much too up close. He grabbed the agent by the neck and smacked him against the crate, stealing a grenade from the unconscious man just before he collapsed. Steve threw the grenade behind him, taking out a group of agents with it.

Up above, Sam had to swerve to avoid getting hit with some serious tank firepower. "Hey, Cap, I found those bad guys you were talking about!"

Steve had a chance to look up and see Sam just narrowly escape the last blow. "You okay?"

"I'm not dead yet!"

"Seren?" Steve called. He had yet to see her in the sky. There was no answer. "Seren!"

"Here!" he heard soon after he caught a swirl of star matter striking one of the tanks and destroyed it in a go.

Seren zoomed by to catch up with Sam who'd gotten himself even more attention. Must be the wings, she theorized. Several quinjets had been deployed and were relentlessly firing after him. Her arms started glowing strongly the closer she got to one jet.

Purposely lingering behind one, she waited for her opportunity. "Sam, focus on your left!" she warned and was thoroughly confused when he groaned a 'Oh, c'mon!' in return. Had she said something wrong? She headed for his right and landed on the jet in that direction. The two pilots gazed up in time to see her shatter their glass with her star matter. She then reached inside and forced their ejection button to work.

One down...several more to go.

Sam managed to land on the Hellicarrier bay for a second before another jet forced him off. Seren sighed heavily from the sky. They would never get their feet into one of the Hellicarriers at this point.

From the ground, Steve was having the same problems. He zoomed through the HYDRA agents, knocking them down as quickly as possible but the more he got through the more agents appeared.

"Eight minutes, Cap!" Maria warned him.

"Yeah, working on it!"

"I gotcha!" Seren said, coming down in a rush.

"Seren, you need to get your Helicarrier—" Maria tried to say when Seren cut her off.

"They're everywhere—I'm multitasking!" She created a string of starmatter spheres between her hands then sent each of them towards the agents in the vicinity. With each section covered, Steve was able to make the rest of the way even quicker than before.

"I'm in!" he would later say after giving her a special thanks. "Alpha locked!"

"Seren, Helicarrier!" Maria said again.

"Yeah!" Seren shot for the second Helicarrier, this time determined to make the trip with no interruptions.

"Falcon, where are you now?" Maria checked in on the man who'd been pretty quiet for a few minutes.

"I had to take a detour!" He was in the air again, closer to the third Helicarrier, when heat-seeking missiles fired after him.

"Sam, are you good?" Seren had caught sight of the missiles and couldn't help but stop again.

"Yeah, yeah, you go!"

Seren's gaze lingered on the missiles but she ultimately decided to keep going. She couldn't afford another distraction. Plus, she still needed to find Chloe. Thankfully, a short moment later, she heard Sam give the clear for the second Helicarrier. One more to go.

Seren landed on the last Helicarrier and was surprised to see no agents around. She balled her fists and cautiously proceeded towards the center. "There's no on here," she told the others. "That's not right..."

"No, it's not," agreed Steve. It sounded a lot like a trap. "Wait for us!"

"Can't do that, lovey. Five minutes left," she reminded him with a perfectly good point. She started running for the center when a bright blue blast of energy hit her from the side. She screamed as her body went into a tumble near the edge.

"Seren!" she heard her name through the comms but everything seemed to ring in her ears for a few minutes while had body felt the horrible sting on her side.

Her vision may have blurred there for a second too. She'd never been hit with energy like that and it took her a minute to realize why...They were always on the same side.

"There would be a 98% chance of a victory if Stardust, Captain America and Falcon were to disappear," she heard from behind. As she began to pull herself, a second blast struck her back and forced her back down. A psionic blast. "The other 2% remains with Black Widow and other vigilantes but it's not much of a threat."

Seren scrunched her face, swallowing down her groan as she once again attempted to stand up.

"You will be alright. It's only a minimal laceration for your kind. Even half Celessians count with a higher healing factor than the enhanced."

Seren wobbled on her feet as she turned around, one hand wrapped around her stomach. She saw Chloe standing across her, smiling in a way that gave her chills. Chloe's face was covered with blue streaks that were seemingly constantly pumping energy. Seren saw the same blue lines peeking out from Chloe's sleeves and neck.

"Chloe, what's happened to you?" Seren felt even worse when her eyes fell on Chloe's left hand. "What is...what is that?"

"I've been upgraded." Chloe raised her left hand and showed Seren her palm. There was a small tech piece lodged in the middle of her palm and it seemed like her flesh was trying to merge with it, or perhaps absorb it. "I will finally gain full access of the Hive Mind, whether they want it or not."

Seren quickly picked up on Chloe's last words. "Whether they want to or...not...?" Could it be that the Hive Mind was rejecting the process? If that were the case then maybe, just maybe, the Hive Mind didn't accept what HYDRA was doing and...maybe they would help her instead. Maybe they would help her reach Chloe.

"HYDRA had to make some modifications in order to fulfil their goals," Chloe said, turning her palm over to see for herself. "The Hive Mind wasn't very compliant but...I can win."

"No, you can't," Seren said quietly, eyeing the relentless glow around Chloe's face. The energy was fighting to keep running through. "The Hive Mind doesn't want that, Chloe. It doesn't want HYDRA to gain access to their knowledge, to their power. Chloe, you don't want this either. You never have!"

"Because I didn't know that this is what I was missing!" Chloe exclaimed with an unnatural glee. "To see the future, to see all the calculations — it's mind blowing! All the power, it's..."

Seren started shaking her head. "Now I know this isn't you. Chloe was always terrified of what the Hive Mind could do. HYDRA made its modifications but not for the Hive Mind. They made them for you. They took your will, your freedom to think for yourself. It's exactly what they did to Sergeant Barnes.

Chloe's lips stretched into another wide smile. "My mind has never been more clear." She suddenly fired and hit Seren square in the chest. She dashed forward as Seren landed harshly on the ground. She turned Seren on her side while the latter was groggy, and plucked out her ear comm, smashing it to pieces in her hand.

"Chloe what are you—?"

"I knew you wouldn't expect that." Chloe dug through Seren's pockets around her waist until she pulled out the last of the targeting blades. "See? The Hive Mind is already accepting our new fate." She straightened up on her feet and turned, walking a few steps away from Seren. "Getting rid of the blade won't minimize the chance of failure. I'm 100% sure of this. Don't destroy it."

It took Seren a couple seconds to understand that Chloe was talking to someone else. When she sat upright, there stood Chloe in front of the Winter Soldier. "Chloe, don't..."

Chloe smiled and handed Bucky the blade. "They'll be landing on the Helicarrier in 10...9...8…"

"No!" Seren fired at the pair without thinking. Bucky made a run while Chloe held off the star matter with a psionic forcefield.

Seren stumbled up on her feet and only then saw Chloe talking to Bucky of all people. He held the targeting blade in his hand. "No, give that back!" Seren ran for the pair. Chloe spun around and clapped her hands together, creating a psionic wave. Seren crashed into a wall.

~ 0 ~

Steve landed with a rush next to Sam. The communications with Seren had gone out minutes ago, not even Maria could get through, and he knew that she was with Chloe. He looked around for a sign of her but it was just as she had said earlier. There were no agents on board. He then heard the distinctive crash of a body nearby. "Ser—"

A hard boot collided with his side, throwing him off the Helicarrier. He managed to hang onto the side at the last moment and then saw Sam flying off the edge (or attempting to). A metal arm reached for his wings and yanked him back.

Steve swallowed hard. Bucky was on the Helicarrier. What had he done with Seren? He started climbing back up as quickly as he could.

"Cap? Cap, come in!" He soon heard Sam through the comms. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm here! I'm still on the Helicarrier!"

"Good, cos so is your friend. I think I saw Seren on the higher deck. She's with Chloe."

"Where are you, Sam?"

"I'm grounded, the suit's down. Sorry, Cap."

"Don't worry, I got it." Steve took the last climb up to the Helicarrier. As soon as he was on his feet, he searched around for anybody at this point, whether it be Seren, Chloe or Bucky. He heard Seren first, maybe a slight divine justice for the moment, so he dashed towards the noise.

Seren had dodged Chloe's psionic blast and, unfortunately, delivered her own starmatter sphere in return. She hated the idea of hurting Chloe on any level. "Chloe, c'mon! It's me! It's Seren!"

Chloe's lips quirked into a smile. "Of course I know who you are. Agent Seren Soul, Stardust, prized agent of S.H.I.E.L.D., blah, blah, blah." She lunged on Seren with all her strength and managed to knock the ginger down. "You know what I thought when I first met you? 'Oh god, it's an alien. How could she ever be trusted to fight for Earth?"

Seren sucked in a breath then smacked her own forehead against Chloe's. The blonde groaned and fell back. "Funny, cos when I first met you, I thought: what the hell is this kid doing? Story of my life, I guess."

Chloe rubbed her forehead with the back of her hand, inadvertently allowing Seren to see her palm again, and clearer.

"Seren!" she heard Steve. Her head flipped to the right and saw him coming towards them. "No!" she yelled at him, forcing him into a skidded stop. "Bucky! He has the-the targeting blade!"

"What?" Steve automatically looked around as if Bucky himself was about to jump out, and he possibly would.

"I'm sorry, they took it from me!" Seren said. "Go get it! I'll take care of Chloe!"

"The hell you will," Chloe spat. She roundhouse kicked Seren but the latter proved quicker by grabbing Chloe's leg and using it to push her backwards. "Sorry! Steve, go!" Seren yelled at the man still conflicted with his choices. "Chloe's my sister. I'm gonna get her back!"

Steve's eyes flickered to Chloe groaning as she pulled herself up from the ground. As much as he loved Chloe—and he really had learned to—he agreed that this was on Seren, much like he had to help Bucky. He turned for the center of the Helicarrier and ran.

Chloe stumbled on her feet for a few seconds. "Can you really fight me?" she asked Seren.

Seren raised her head. "I could never fight Chloe Winters, but you're not her right now."

Chloe snorted. "I am."

"No, you're not," Seren's voice was sharp and final, wiping off any trace of amusement on Chloe's face. "HYDRA has taken your mind and forced it to accept that new tech piece, but it's not working, is it? Because if it had, you would've turned into another puppet like Sergeant Barnes. Your mind is having trouble fitting in a whole new piece so it's altering your personality, your thoughts, your actions. That is not my friend. But don't worry, I'm gonna get her back."

"Yeah? And how are you going to do that?" Chloe raised an eyebrow.

Seren balled her fists, letting them practically shine with power. "By giving you a good smack in the head." She flashed a smirk.

~ 0 ~

Bucky was waiting for Steve. He held the targeting blade in his hand, an act alone that had Steve genuinely surprised. Why not destroy it already?

"People are gonna die, Buck. I can't let that happen," Steve decided to break the silence first. He kept his safe distance but was prepared to attack as soon as he had to. For the moment though, Bucky only stared at him. "Please, don't make me do this. Give me the targeting blade." But still, Bucky did not budge.

Time was running out.

Without another thought, Steve threw his shield at Bucky. Like last time, Bucky caught it swiftly in his hand and chucked right back to him. They ran down the catway to meet each other in the middle. Bucky had two guns firing on Steve but with a swift kick, the latter was able to throw them to the side (though he did get one graze on his side in the process). He got a quick opportunity and shoved Bucky to the side to get into the targeting blade system. He could at least bring it up then swipe it from Bucky.

Bucky yanked him back with the intentions of pulling his knife on him. In doing so, however, Steve was able to reach for the targeting blade. He got it for a split moment before Bucky threw him back. Steve heard the fall of the targeting blade from a distance. He raised his head to see the blade dangerously on the edge. He pulled himself up and ran for it only for it to fall below. He picked up his pace and jumped over the edge as well, landing on the ground below.

~ 0 ~

Chloe raged against Seren with fists in the air. Seren would admit that Chloe was stronger with this new tech piece but her fighting was all over the place. If she had to take a guess, she would say that the Hive Mind was interfering. "Don't let them win, Hive Mind!" she called. "If HYDRA gains access to your power, they'll know everything about your species. All your secrets in human hands!"

Chloe shoved Seren and angrily shouted at her to stop. "The Hive Mind doesn't speak to you!"

"No, but I bet everything that it's listening!" Seren snapped. "And I bet that it's messing with you right now!" Chloe growled and threw a sloppy jet of energy at her. Seren crossed her arms in front of her and produced a shield to block the blast. "So much for calculating," Seren smirked. "And that's sad considering you've trained with me, with Natasha, Citlalli — you've had all kinds of training and right now, you seem like a clumsy high school cheerleader right now." She got what she wanted with that jab. Chloe's anger made her blind and thus more open for attack.

Chloe started throwing psionic blasts again. Seren shot into the air, dodging each blast.

"Get back down!" Chloe ordered.

"Okay!" Seren decided to swoop down and grab Chloe by her shoulders. "I love you, Chloe, but…" She unceremoniously dropped Chloe. The blonde tumbled on the ground but when she stopped, she was more furious than ever.

She jumped on her feet and dodged the following star matter spheres Seren sent her way. Her vision blurred as numbers sprouted from every corner in her mind.

Left, right, under, another left—

She shook her head as she followed the instructions to avoid the spheres. She wanted the specific sphere to…

Third!

When the third star matter sphere came her way, Chloe captured it with a shield. Seren gasped, eyes blinking wide. Since when can she do that!? With a smirk, Chloe sent it right back to her. Seren barely dodged it with her surprise.

~ 0 ~

Steve couldn't remember another time where the fight was too close. As skilled as his opponents were, in the end he always won. Today, he couldn't be sure that would be the same story. Bucky had similar strength to him, similar skills and Steve was almost sure that those skills could outwit him if he wasn't careful. HYDRA played dirty, a known fact and Bucky had always been an agile fighter anyways. A deadly combination.

Steve landed on the same level as the blade and ran for it. Just before he could reach it, his shield hit him in the back. Bucky had come down as well and caught up with Steve. He plunged a knife into Steve's shoulder then headed for the targeting blade. Steve forced the knife out of his shoulder, ignoring the blotch of blood that surged from it, as well as the wicked pain he felt, and started running. He reached for Bucky just as the latter had grabbed the blade. He dodged Bucky's attempts of a clean punch and in return headbutted him several times. As much as it pained him (both emotionally and physically), he grabbed Bucky by the throat, raising him for a second before slamming him down on the ground.

As groggy as Bucky was, he had yet to let go of the blade. Steve grabbed him from behind in an armlock. "Drop it!" he yelled, but Bucky kept a tight grip around the blade. Why couldn't he just make things easy this one moment?

Bucky possibly squeezed the chip in his hand even more. He was stubborn, that much was still in him. He reached an arm back to try and pry Steve off him but instead of managing that, Steve broke that arm. The two fell back on the ground but even then, Steve still held Bucky by the neck. If he wasn't going to willingly let go of the blade, then he would have to by force. Steve tightened his grip around Bucky's neck until he passed out. He felt terrible about it but it had to be done, thousands of people were counting on him.

~ 0 ~

Chloe grabbed Seren's arm and pulled her up. "Sixty percent chance of your demise right here and now."

"Just 60%?" Seren raised an eyebrow, ignoring the ache in her chest. Now she knew what her opponents felt like when she attacked them. "Could it be maybe the Hive Mind is gaining the upperhand, then?"

Chloe seemed to twitch as she tried to think about the calculations. "The other 40%" — she twitched again — "is unaccounted now..."

Seren took advantage of the next time Chloe twiced and used the grip Chloe had on her arm to throw the blonde over her and onto the ground. Chloe fell with a thud, eyes squeezed shut in pain.

"I'm no expert but I think you're going into overdrive," Seren said, none too pleased with the fact. She didn't want to Chloe to suffer an irreversible effect. "The tech piece needs to come out, Chloe. Let me help you."

Chloe struggled to get back on her feet. She rolled her shoulders over to shake off the pain. "I don't need any help." She went to throw her fist but Seren caught it with one hand.

Seren's eyes flashed colorfully. "I love you, Chloe, but I know a lot more than you. And if I have to burn that tech out of your hand, I will."

Chloe felt the sizzle of her skin and started screaming.

~ 0 ~

"One minute!" Maria's voice rang in Steve's ear, along with everything else.

He was climbing his way back up to the systems when a bullet was fired and grazed his left thigh. He used all his strength to finish the trip up. Bucky was still a bit lost with his own balance too. The system was just as he'd left it earlier. He rushed inside as best as he could, which was a series of wobbles and sprints.

"Thirty seconds, Cap!" Maria went again.

"Stand by!" He pulled the targeting blade out and reached for the system when Bucky fired again, this time hitting him straight in the stomach. That one forced Steve down for a moment. He looked down at himself to see another blotch of red on his stomach. No matter, he literally didn't have time for it.

"Twenty seconds!" Maria could already see the algorithm targeting potential victims. The White house, the Pentagon, the C.I.A., Stark Tower were just a few of those places.

Steve climbed up to his feet again and pushed his arm forwards, placing in the targeting blade just in time. "Charlie locked." At least whatever happened afterwards, he would know that the people were safe. He, however, had no idea where he stood.

~ 0 ~

Chloe screamed as her hand burned. She slapped and smacked Seren as much as she could but the Celessian proved her superior biology.

"Help me, Hive Mind," Seren called, "Please."

Chloe emitted a force of a shield, shoving Seren across from her. With a heavy breath, she took her hand and studied the damage on her palm. She felt it hard to blink and focus as so much information started flashing in front of her eyes.

~ 0 ~

"Okay, Cap, get out of there!" Maria said once she had successfully locked the Helicarriers onto one another. "Get Seren too!"

Steve felt like that would be an impossible task. He was stumbling to stay on his feet. "Fire now!"

"But, Steve…"

"Do it!" Steve snapped. He looked up above as if he would see Seren or Chloe, but of course luck wasn't that easy right now. He had to believe that Seren would be able to get out of there in time with Chloe.

Each of the Helicarriers started firing at one another.

Up above, Seren saw the mess that was starting to come down on them (literally). She pulled herself up to her feet then looked at the ground underneath her feet and wondered where Steve was right now. Had he gotten off? He had to. With or without Bucky, he had to get out. She believed he would which was why she turned around to Chloe.

"Need a ride?"

Chloe only glowered at her. She lowered her injured hand, angrier than ever. She knew exactly what Seren was going to do. "Don't you dare—"

Seren zoomed towards Chloe like she would ram her down but instead, she jumped off the Helicarrier with Chloe in her arms.

"Let me go! Let me go!" Chloe screamed all the way down until Seren did just that. She let Chloe fall from a safe distance on the ground. The force of it was enough to knock her out.

Seren landed beside her and fell to her knees. Her arms hovered over Chloe, going back and forth as she decided what to do. Her hand was badly burned and the tech piece was still lodged in her palm and by the looks of it, it was only getting worse. It wasn't absorbing the right way and now with her interferance, it looked like it was sparking from the inside. "Oh Chloe, what do I do? What do I do?"

~ 0 ~

Against his own injuries, Steve managed to help Bucky free himself from the fallen rubble. "You know me," he insisted afterwards.

Bucky lashed out at him in anger. "No, I don't!" He raged. It was an entirely new reaction that Steve would take with hope. If Bucky was angry and not stoically cold then it meant he had an inkling doubt that what he was saying was true.

"Bucky, you've known me your whole life!" Bucky continued to punch him but he wasn't going to fight back. If he did, then Bucky would never listen to him. "Your name is James Buchanan Barnes!"

"Shut up!"

Steve pulled off his mask and let his shield fall which, in turn, let it fall out of the Helicarrier altogether. "I'm not gonna fight you. You're my friend."

Bucky ignored him and shoved him to the ground. "You're my mission!" He delivered the worst punches he could to make his point. He couldn't remember something that wasn't there—

He scrunched his face when a blip of a distorted image clouded him for a second. Absolutely not. "You're my mission!"

Steve let his body fall limp. His energy was already dwindling with his injuries catching up to him. He couldn't fight and he didn't want to. "Then finish it," he said, all too much defeated. Bucky held his fist up, looking almost hesitant for a moment. "Cause I'm with you to the end of the line."

Something about those specific words forced Bucky to stop for a full second. The distorted images were trying to push back, too fast to actually see anything but the point is that they were there. There were images to have. He felt the same when Chloe had eased his mind earlier...

The bottom of the Helicarrier lurched on its side and forced Steve down into the river below. Bucky managed to hold on from his side but there was still something he was trying to see. He couldn't...whatever they were, those images had come because of the words that that man had said.

"I knew him," he said, inadvertently proving her point.

Chloe very quickly confirmed it. "You did!" After that, she had agents coming to retrieve her. She thrashed and yelled at them to leave her alone.

He had thought Chloe was telling the truth. No one else around him showed emotions. She did and she was very confident in it too.

~ 0 ~

Seren had Chloe's hand in hers. She couldn't imagine the type of pain Chloe was in from the burn injuries. From the side, she heard a series of splashes. When she looked over, all she saw were the pieces of the Helicarriers finally touching water. She really wished she had her ear comm. still in place. Chloe would need medical attention fast.

She froze altogether when she saw Bucky emerging from the water. For a moment, she thought she would have to fight yet again. The feeling intensified when she realized he was pulling Steve's unconscious body with him. As much as she knew Steve loved him, Seren wouldn't hesitate to fight Bucky too. He was not going to take Steve anywhere.

Seren had just stood up when Bucky met her gaze. He had pulled Steve to the ground and left his body beside Chloe's. Seren stayed where she was for the moment, shocked as he seemingly stepped away from the two unconscious bodies. She dared to even say that Bucky was confused with himself too.

He looked up from Steve, meeting Seren's gaze again. She was breathing heavily, probably wondering what he was going to do next. That was a good question, what was he going to do now?

Chloe started shuddering and twitching again. Seren quickly fell on her knees beside Chloe and tried helping keeping her still. The blue lines around Chloe's face was glowing much too bright and the tech piece in her palm was sparking on the outside now, adding more sting to her burned flesh. Helpless, Seren looked up to Bucky.

"Please, you don't know me and that's fine, but you know him." She swallowed hard when she saw all the injuries that Steve had. "I know it doesn't seem like it but he tried to help you and...and maybe you just did it too. If could help her too…" She motioned to Chloe. "Please...HYDRA hurt her the same way it hurt you. She didn't want for this to happen. Please help her."

Bucky looked down at Chloe. Even with the mind wipe, he still remembered parts of her from his missions before. It was funny how HYDRA thought he was always back at zero when they "started over with him". That was his secret. He was never back at zero. There were always bits and pieces he was left with.

Chloe smiled slightly at him. "Can I?" She gestured her wrists still bound by his hands.

The shock wasn't enough to cover his expression when she asked for his permission. Because of that, Bucky gave a slim nod of his head. Now he was curious and that was a novelty. He hadn't been curious about anything in...he didn't know how much time had passed.

Chloe focused all her power on Bucky. Never had she tried so hard to make it work. While Bucky had no idea what was supposed to be happening, he felt it. It was strange. His mind, as fuzzy and conflicted as it was, started to shift. Every thought, no matter what it was, was dissolving to allow this wave of serenity to wash over him. How could this woman be producing that level of calmness? As much as he had planned to stay alert, his eyes fell shut. For the first time since he could remember, everything dark around him slipped away. He knew nothing but sweet bliss and calmness.

Chloe watched the people around them hurriedly move to do whatever Pierce instructed them to do. "What...what are they going to do?"

Clamps shut around his arms.

"Woah, woah, woah, wait!" Chloe pushed herself towards them, forcing the agents around her to hold her back. "Leave him alone! It's my fault! I did it — leave him alone!"

Bucky's eyes lowered to Chloe's burned hand. That tech piece had been recently implanted. He still remembered her screams when they carried her away while he was to be "prepped". She had tried fighting for him, tried to defend him. After being prepped, he was introduced to HYDRA's newest asset and according to them, the Winter Soldier would be working closely with this asset. She would provide all the insight on their missions while he carried them out.

It had been a very long time since he had met someone who didn't want to instantly "work" on him. Chloe was almost like the rest of HYDRA's assets, those who were brought in against their will. He would have to run, he knew that, which just begged the question of what Chloe would have to do now to take care of herself.

He would pay her back with the same coin, almost.

He moved around, startling Seren in the process, and stopped by Chloe. Seren's breathing couldn't possibly be harder. She watched him with hawk eyes, hands at the ready to commence a fight. He lowered his metal hand to Chloe's burned one. His fingers touched the tech piece in her palm and with one swift pull, he forced it out of her hand. Seren scrunched her face when he saw Chloe's skin pull apart to leave a big hole in the middle of her palm.

That's one way to do it, she swallowed hard.

Bucky stepped back with the tech piece in hand. Seren quickly sought Chloe's hand to try and stop the bleeding. She would then glance over to Steve and seeing him unconscious and Chloe's bleeding not stopping made her all the more frantic.

"We need to get them to the hospital! Can you….?" She looked up to find Bucky gone. She scanned the area and saw nothing. He was just gone.

~ 0 ~

Steve felt the ache of his body before he was fully conscious. He could hear the faint noise of music in the air and a few seconds later, he realized he was on a bed. Considering how bad he felt, it had to be a hospital. He turned his head as much as he could and was able to see Sam sitting next to his bed. He should have figured the music was Sam's. "On your left," he said, making Sam's head flip in his direction.

He smiled. "Good, you're being funny again. Seren will like that."

At the mention of Seren, Steve tried to move a bit more. "Where is sh—"

Sam snapped his fingers in a direction Steve couldn't see. It was the open doorway to the room because Seren was standing outside, conversing with a doctor. At the snap of Sam's fingers, she looked back and immediately waved the doctor away. Sam got up and moved his chair just as she hurried inside the room.

"I'll go join Natasha in Chloe's room," Sam told her as he left the room.

"Hey there," Seren took Steve's hand. Though groggy, he met her gaze. She was smiling softly at him. "We have got to stop meeting like this."

It hurt to laugh so Steve only managed a little one. "Somehow I prefer it this way more than the other way around." It then struck him that Seren hated hospitals of all things. "Hey, you conquered your fear..."

Seren smiled solely for the look on his face. "Oh, don't be fooled, lovey, I still hate these places. But you're here, and so is Chloe, and I'm not going anywhere. I'm watching these doctors like a hawk. I'm not letting them pump anything into either of you without me knowing what it is." Steve wanted to bring her hand closer and when Seren caught on, she saved him the work and picked up his hand to press a kiss over it. Steve started recalling things and one of those was the image of Chloe's face with some strong blue streaks. "Chloe, where is she…?"

"Shhh, she's in another room," Seren told him before he got too antsy.

"What's happened to her?"

"Uh, you know, the tech piece HYDRA implanted on her palm wasn't absorbed so well into her body."

"Did they get it out?"

Seren bit her lower lip. She'd been going over in her head how to answer this question. "Umm...yes…" She could keep quiet about it, she knew, but in the end the guilt would gnaw at her head. "Bucky sort of did that."

"What—?"

"I asked him to help and he did. I don't know why but I'm grateful with him." Seren hesitated her next words. "He's gone, Steve. I'm sorry."

Steve wasn't all that surprised. He didn't remember much after the Helicarrier sent him down. "Did he...did he say anything?"

Seren shook her head. "No, I'm sorry."

"Not your fault," he tried to squeeze her hand but his strength wasn't all that good at the moment.

Seren still felt his intentions and squeezed his hand instead. "I'm here, lovey. I'm not going anywhere." She leaned over to press a kiss to his cheek, careful to avoid his bruises.

"Hm, even if I'm here for days?" Steve challenged with a hint of a smirk on his face.

"Well, that's the lucky thing when your boyfriend is all super-serumed...his injuries don't last very long."

"So that means you won't get to be my nurse for a long time..." Steve pretended to sigh disappointingly. Seren blushed and would've smacked him if he hadn't gone through hell already.

"Oh, hush already." Seren took the chair Sam left and scooted it close to the bed.

"Aren't you supposed to be in one of these?" Steve said once he noticed the faint bruises on her neck. "Not that I would want you to be but..."

"I'm okay," Seren assured him. "It turns out that I do in fact heal faster than most. Chloe was right about that. Or, I guess it was the Hive Mind." She cleared her throat and began to think about things. "I really hurt her, Steve. I burned her hand trying to get that second tech piece out of her..."

"Seren, you did what you had to to save her..." Steve said, managing to squeeze her hand a bit that time.

"I gave her a serious burn," Seren said, "She's going to hate me."

"No, she didn't want any of this stuff. She'll understand."

Seren wanted to believe it as much as Steve did. "For now...let's just make sure that you are okay. You and Chloe."

"And you," Steve said, prompting her to remind him that she was already healing. "I don't mean the physical injuries. SHIELD is gone. You are not okay." Sure enough, with his words the smile on Seren's face slowly waned. "We all have some work cut out for us."

[marshmallowprotection]

Yknow I’m still mad that people think V in Saeran’s AE was out of character. I love V btw, but I feel like it’s so in character that he does this. This is a dude who just disappears completely in Jaehee’s route and doesn’t tell anyone anything. Like for 6 months no one has heard a word from this man.

Or even if he doesn’t drop off the face of this earth, he still disappears on his “trips” and in each single route, Seven is still under the impression his brother is safe. (Except for Jumin’s Route which I wonder what V told him for Seven to just accept and move on? I can only assume he further lied and reassured him.)

V is a very interesting character and his route added a lot more complexity to his situation and feelings. But I feel like some people were so fixated on his route, they forget the harm he’s caused in enabling Rika and calling it unconditional love in everyone else’s route. He holds accountability in trying to “save” everyone (including Rika) by keeping everyone blissfully ignorant in an effort to solve everything himself.

And even then in the Secret Ending episodes, Saeran snitched by telling Mint Eye Vanderwood, Saeyoung and MC’s location. And who pops up to go with them? V. He begs Rika to not involve innocent people, but she dismisses him instead asking what to do with him. And he says “do as you please”. Being a martyr ain’t gonna solve anything, MC, Saeyoung anf Vanderwood know too much now. She aint letting anyone leave.

Being complacent and an enabler isn’t a good thing. He even says in his own route that his unconditional love and enabling her was hurting everyone. That his sacrificial tendencies weren’t solving anything. MC helps him realize that he really shouldn’t do this alone.

We never got to see the full extent of it in the Secret Episodes bc he dies. So I find V in Saeran’s AE so well done bc in other routes he’s already fallen down the rabbit hole for Rika, and each route’s ending is basically him going further down for her. But we don’t see this bc all Routes are made in a specific order of information. We just know V is very mysterious. But Saeran’s AE? We experience his descent. Like it’s happening in front of MC.

I just feel like V is overly victimized by the fandom for them to conclude his out of character in Saeran’s AE, he is both a victim and perpetrator bc of his complacency and enabling. This isn’t to say he’s a bad person, the world isn’t blavk and white. I think V is a good person who only had the best intentions. But the AE holds him accountable more. The Secret Episodes, he died before he could be held accountable. And the other routes he disappears before he could be held accountable.

I do have a bias tho, as an older sibling, if anything happened to my little sister and I was constantly lied to that she was safe and she isn’t. I’d lose my mind, like I gave y’all one job to take care of a child what do you mean she’s a cultist now?

This can be said for a lot of characters honestly, people reducing Zen as a narcissist. Yoosung being obsessed with Rika and the whole “being in love with his cousin”. Jumin being heartless Or even Ray being reduced to an uwu baby, even when Danger Ray is shown to prove otherwise.

Jihyun is a complicated character just as much as Rika is. They were both unhealthy to each other in ways I don't even want to get into as it might take all day to get through what went down between them in the past and present. They weren't in a place to be in a relationship at all. They didn't need to be with each other basically, point blank.

They went into their relationship not for the sake of love, but for the sake of someone holding out for love saving them as a mask that was barely stuck on their face as it was to prove the devil couldn't be real only to realize she wanted to be him, not be with him, and the other looking for a muse to navigate his feelings through hers and make up for the past in which his father failed his mother. That's not what any person wants in a relationship.

They needed help with their problems. Had they gotten that when they needed it, things wouldn't have gotten to where they did. But, that's what makes the game so interesting in the first place. We're looking at people who're human and struggling to be alive. People who make mistakes and fuck up. A lot. You're right, though, every character here is struggling in some capacity and it's not the right flavor for some people. That's because they're human.

You're not going to like everyone you meet, guys.

That's why I love this game in the first place. These characters aren't just abstract fantasy. They've got depth and it's fun to think about! It makes me feel better to know that there are characters who, even at the best, still have a long road to go before they feel better. That part is what humanizes them. It's what makes us feel so strongly about all of them in the first place.

V is not a character you can point at and say, "He's bad! He's good!" It doesn't work that way. He's human. He's done some bad and good in his life. We can't look at it from a black-and-white perspective when our world doesn't even operate that way. People are going to make a lot of mistakes in life, intentional or not, and it's up to us to figure out what we're willing to have in our lives. If you don't want someone like V in your life, by all means.

But, I get tired of people saying this stuff, too. V wasn't out of his element at all. He will do things in the name of trying to save every person in the room, no matter what the details are. That's a part of his unchecked trauma, which he is well aware of because he's able to say "I can't abandon people like my father abandoned my father. No matter what, I can't."

Which is why he refuses to give up on Rika in Saeran's Route. That's why he sells himself out to Saejoong to protect her, knowing that it wasn't healthy or right, but also concluding that this would be about the only thing to keep Rika out of prison and in danger... while letting the twins be safe at that expense. There's a thought bubble you can click as well where he mentions that he's playing the role of a villain to make this work. He knows what he's doing.

The same way he knew what he was doing in the Secret Ending by bowing his head to Rika, begging her to only hurt him, only to travel to the cabin and take you and your little group back to Mint Eye. He will do things for the sake of not being his father, to the detriment of everyone in the room. Does that make him a monster? Hard to say, I think it comes down to your feelings on the matter.

Don't say that V is only a victim. V is a victim, he truly is. But he is also an enabler, and guilty of doing wrong, too. You can feel sympathy for him, of course, the same way a lot of people identify and feel for Rika, as long as you know that he's made mistakes and done wrong, too. I think that's important for people to think about... especially if you're playing through Saeran's After Ending which is all about taking your accountability and being willing to face it.

Even if that means you lose everything.

The truth is better than lies.

This can be applied to any character in the game. Any of them can be spoken about like this since they've all done or said things that might not be the best. That's coming from someone who loves Saeran quite a bit. I can tell you right now that he's done a lot of things that aren't good. But, I love him and understand what he's been through. I chose to forgive him and understand him, but that doesn't mean that others have to do the same.

But, if we're going to talk about characters who are morally grey, we need to talk about everything. You can't discount their mistakes and fuck ups just to point out something else. I try to avoid talking a lot about Rika and V in that vein because I've been here since 2016 and I am so tired of having the same debates come up over and over again about V and Rika.

You might be surprised to hear this but despite everything, V is like... my third favorite character because of how deeply complex he is as a person. I just never get to talk about it because it's too often people ignore the depth of his character. It's a shame people miss that talk when it's so blatant in his route where he says, "I did wrong. I need to make things right by speaking the truth. I accept responsibility and I know I'm at fault."

[crehador]

brother crab's winter 2024 parting thoughts: dog signal

alright well yysy it's not much to look at, the animation/art style isn't exactly "modern" or exceptional (though personally i was quite charmed by it)

that aside, this was overall a really pleasant surprise to me!

tl;dr: fun cast with some surprisingly compelling and deep(ish) backstories, would recommend but with the disclaimers that a) it's episodic and b) there's quite a lot of animal mistreatment since each episode is about helping a dog whose person isn't treating it right (most if not all the cases have hopeful endings, but some parts may be hard to watch)

also niwa and samura have the most HILARIOUSLY classic toxic yaoi situationship without any of the fun parts (the actual yaoi), more on that later lmao

full review:

the series is for the most part episodic, with each episode dealing with a dog owner who comes to a certain dog trainer for help. i'm a fan of a good episodic series, even when the episodes can be hit or miss, so the structure was very enjoyable for me

the stories of the main cast were surprisingly compelling, too. it seemed like it would be just a very silly show—what with it starting with a guy (cv knb murasakibara) walking another guy (cv knb kuroko) around on a leash in public for two hours—but the character backstories that were revealed throughout the series did actually feel delightfully nuanced to me

(for example "yeah that old man did hit a dog and that's not great but the dog in question was biting the shit out of the kid he sees as a son so it's not... not understandable that he would react that way and while i'm not saying he should be proud of hitting a dog i guess i am saying it does suck for him that son guy hated him and went no contact for years for it")

one of my favorite episodes, ironically, barely involved the main cast at all. most of the episodes deal with this dog training business training dogs (shock!) but in this one episode, fairly late in the series, the owner was a struggling mangaka suffering from immense social anxiety, whose only friend was his dog who one day suddenly loses his hearing

that's such a tough thing that you really wouldn't explain anyone to know how to handle on their own without training. the mangaka even runs into the mc (trainee dog trainer) early in the episode and receives a business card for the dog training shop, but instead of taking his dog in, he does his best on his own to develop ways to communicate with his newly deaf dog

and it works! not only does he find a way to keep his dog comfortable with him, his efforts make him less concerned with what other people think of him as well. he managed to go to the dog training shop in the end, to see if there's anything he could be doing better for his dog, only to be told that they can't do anything for him—because he's already done everything right

(in establishing a way to communicate with his deaf dog, that is. there are other issues he gets chewed out for, which i really liked and found realistic)

i feel like it was just such a well-timed episode as a narrative device, because it shows that while the main dog trainer is great (the trainee dog trainer mc practically worships him) it's not that everyone in the world is helpless without him

but anyway

REGARDING THE SITUATIONSHIP WHAT THE FUCK LMAO first of all i love it

samura has just been dumped by an extremely shitty girlfriend when he meets niwa, while out walking the dog (or attempting to walk the dog) said shitty girlfriend dumped on him

he's doing a terrifically bad job, to the point where niwa (pro dog trainer) can't bear to watch. so what does he do well of course he has to reeducate samura by... putting him on a leash and walking him around the park, in public, for two hours. to show him just how wrong he's treating his dog

samura somehow gets a job out of this and they start working together. at one point he reveals he is GOING TO THE SALON and GETTING HIS HAIR PERMED so that it is curly because niwa has a poodle and seems to like curly hair (???)

jump cut to the final episode and we're finding out samura's tragic lore—parentified by a narcissistic mom, down with too much filial piety disease. when samura finally decides he's no longer sending money back home, his mom comes to the dog training shop to be like "sir uwu you have to give my son a raise so he can keep sending money home uwu he's such a good hard-working boy please pay him what he's worth"

and niwa is straight up like "actually he sucks and you suck get the fuck out of my shop" AND THEN LATER IN THE EPISODE samura's mom calls him (has been calling him repeatedly since meeting his freak of a boss) and NIWA ANSWERS THE PHONE and while she's complaining about the money situation and the freak boss (niwa) he basically tells her "you still suck and your son still sucks but i'm keeping him, fuck off"

like my god?? that woman is going to go away thinking her son has gotten into an extremely abusive relationship with his boss. i mean fuck her entirely, she does suck, but that is very much Not the situation (even though it does Very Much appear to be the situation)

anyway. ultimately this one lands in the :) category for me, originally picked it up for the cast (kuroko and mukkun and also KENN) and didn't have very high expectations but am thrilled to be pleasantly surprised

[postsforposting]

go s2 pondering

If the almond syrup theories are right, it represents that god is watching, but also unrequited love. Literally it's a gift from the Metatron to Az, but it's also a gift that looks like understanding and love but is actually hate and disdain, much like Metatron's offer to Az of the supreme archangel position. It's not out of admiration and respect like promotions ought to be, it's done out of setting him up to fail: god is watching, I am watching he says, and you are worthless. Neither of them respects the other, but they both fear the other.

It's not poison or mind control, it's simply what's happening.

"nobody ever chooses death, do they"

well except they do.

elspeth tries to kill herself, and the only reason she doesn't is because two supernatural beings perform miracles to stop her. MIRACLES! she doesn't die only because magic happens. elspeth knows what she's doing and she doesn't care.

sitis curses god and job is about to join in, but they are stopped by....supernatural intervention from a demon who knows what happens when you do that. sitis and job absolutely know what it means to curse god. they aren't doing it naively.

the people who don't choose death are the nazis...but really they did, because they were told to run and didn't, and they were told they could either be flies for eternity or be zombies, which they assumed would only be for 24 hours....and they chose death in the church and chose, unwittingly, living death as zombies for eternity.

gabriel and beelz chose exile rather than erasure, which i suppose is one form of death over another. it's the death of who they used to be, their former selves. same with the Fall: the death of who they were rather than submitting to god, and we still don't know if any of them truly died in the war in heaven.

what about the book of life? it's also got the power of death, and there's the idea that editing it can edit what has happened in real life.

it's been floated that Metatron is editing the book of life throughout s2, and that's why everyone is acting weird and out of character. I don't think that's true anymore--I think it's more that all the memories we see of the past are explicitly what Az remembers, and he is not objective. We already know they see things differently: "your exactly is different from my exactly", so what Az remembers might be exactly what he thought happened, but that does not mean that it's actually what happened. What Az believes Crowley said, or anyone said, is not necessarily what that person meant. He remembers someone agreeing with him, but that doesn't mean they actually did, and that would explain discrepancies in his memories vs how people act.

So what we saw isn't God's narration and an objective view like it was in S1, but colored through Az's bias, either with rose tinted glasses or black shades depending on who he's looking at and what he's feeling and his beliefs at the time. Crowley could do the exact same thing as a demon the first few times they met, and Az would think those things evil, but also think nothing of those same things just before S1. Different exactlys, remember? So what are the discrepancies between what he's remembering and what actually happened?

Perhaps it's any time heaven's involved. Az directly lied to God in Eden, and somehow didn't think he was supposed to go directly to hell then. So why did he think he should suddenly after Job? Did he do something a lot worse than just lie to a bunch of angels? What did he leave out or skew?

It's been pointed out that the same music is used at the beginning of S2E1, universe creation, that is used for the Metatron appearing over the bookshop gateway. This was said to be proof that it's a Book of Life edited memory, but what if that music is "this is the voice of God", someone speaking as God, speaking for the ineffable plan, and its presence is saying that Crowley was part of that? Just as Crowley says at the end of S1, "what if it was planned like this from the start", as could be inferred from God saying nothing about Az giving the flaming sword away which was the same sword that was necessary to kick off the apocalypse? "What if you did the wrong thing and I did the right one", well, what if they were both right? What if God is playing games in a pitch dark room and won't tell you the rules? That is completely asinine but it is consistent with what we know of this God, who watches as her people suffer like they're nothing but funny blorbos she tortures for amusement and gets angry if they won't work as intended, like us threatening the toaster when it burns the bread.

also i'm pretty sure az told crowley about what happened in hell during the holy water bath. az as crowley says to hell, "i think you should leave me alone from now on", and this is the deal crowley refers to when beelz drags him down to hell: i thought we had a deal. so az had to tell him about that. but crowley did not tell az about what happened in heaven, whether leaving out only gabriel's insults or about trying to kill him at all. or it could be crowley did tell him about trying to kill him, but az thinks that's....normal behavior and doesn't think it's anything to worry about, much like how he may be misremembering past events.