#but it's not something for the fans and cc's to resolve

[yelow-heart]

I miss JaidenAnimations, tails. I miss her a lot..

[sootsz]

qsmp has accidentally stumbled into a psychology experiment that would make the stanford prison experiment sob in fear. they’ve gotten a bunch of cc’s, and tens of thousands of viewers, to be deeply emotionally connected to pixel eggs. in doing so they’ve presented a problem:

how the fuck do you get outta this

the eggs were obviously never intended to be permanent (logging on every day to do tasks isn’t feasible to upkeep forever) and they were even given a vague limit of When Mama Dragon Comes Back (and then, of course, the “6 days til they die” thing). now you’ve made it so quackity (and his team) have a big ol dilemma, where two things are true: 1) they can’t keep the eggs forever since it’s not sustainable 2) you can’t take away the eggs without, oopsies, emotionally damaging your friends that you invited to have fun on your server.

turns out, when you give a group of humans all their own fully-realized individual who presents as a (weak, vulnerable) child that is in need of care from them, whatever instinct has kept us alive for generations goes “!!!!!” which is both really cool and compassionate, but also kinda concerning!

because, well: not sustainable! and if the eggs aren’t sustainable, what’s the alternative? killing them?? no! just look at jaiden’s reaction to bobby “losing” a life, even when it wasn’t his last one. or bad’s genuinely heart wrenching reaction to dapper losing a life. or how quiet and angry phil got after chayanne and tallulah had a “nightmare,” before it was resolved. that’s not acting. that’s real. what the hell will they do if the eggs actually die? from what i see, the cc’s are taking the “6 days til death” thing as something that’s avoidable. a threat that can be overcome. and for their sake, i hope it is.

ever played a dnd game where you actually feel insulted bc of smth someone’s pc did? yeah. that x20 because there’s SO much overlap between “streamer persona” and “literally just who they are”. and this level of roleplay character bleeding is cool, but i hope the eggs are handled carefully, or all those involved might end up actually hurt.

there’s also the whole added element of fans, many of whom only tune into the streams for egg content. the plot is very egg-centric. the roleplaying and characterization that the cc’s are doing is all centered around the eggs in one way or another. it’s been going on for a month, but it does not feel at all resolved, and plot-wise it would completely mess up so many plot threads happening if the eggs were all to go (charlie’s unresolved deal with lil j, quackity’s goal to bond with tallulah, the trial, etc etc) so if you take away the eggs, you risk messing up the whole vibe they’ve got going on, and facing backlash from fans who are also emotionally compromised by pixel eggs

we inherently want to protect the cute and vulnerable, and by god are these eggs cute and so very fragile. (then, there’s another layer of people’s own issues that they project onto the eggs. be it desire for paternity, some kind of maternal instinct, or, even in the matter of chayanne, using chayanne as a sort of way to cope with loss by making connections between chayanne and technoblade. which is beautiful and very sweet but would give chayanne dying some additional emotionally charged elements which i think should be avoided at all costs). there’s a reason that movies and other media generally do not kill named children characters—audiences really hate it. it’s taboo for good reason.

which leads us to

schrodinger’s egg: until sunday, they r both alive and dead. and this is both good and bad. god help us all

[misc-obeyme]

Hi CC!

I’m curious about how you feel about the Barbatos-insults-Solomon gag!

I thought it was really funny at first but now that it’s been almost a year since NB came out, I’ve kinda grown sick of it. It feels very prevalent in events and fan works.

As a Barbie babe and Solobestie your opinion is very important! *_*

Love you!💕

Hello dearest Ivy! I hope you're having a lovely evening! 💕

Ah okay, well, I kinda feel the same way about it, honestly.

Considering the fact that they are close friends in the OG, it really felt like a situation of a silly squabble from the start. And Barb was definitely doing it in his own Barbatos way, smiling while also calling Solomon stuff like a sham and so on.

But as the story progressed, Barbatos really got beyond just simple insults. After Solomon summoned him to the labyrinth, Barbatos was so angry he teleported Solomon far away. That's more than just petty squabbling between friends in my mind.

And that's why I had a hard time accepting the supposed reason for Barb's anger. Barbatos isn't exactly known for losing his shit. He's always the calm one, for the most part. And even when he does get upset, it's restrained. So it would have made sense to me if he was just coming up with creative insults. Kind of a passive aggressive thing, like ah yes the sham of a sorcerer that put me eighth on the list. I might've believed that.

But it's so constant and to the point where other characters notice and ask Solomon what he did to Barbatos. And also requiring MC to finally be like okay what is going on with you guys? And even after they supposedly talk it out, Barbatos is still upset with Solomon.

It's been such an unsatisfactory conclusion to the whole thing that I'm personally kinda over it?? It was funny at first because Barb is usually so mellow, to have him saying stuff like that was entertaining. But now I'm like okay can these two please kiss and make up for real?

Because I much prefer when they get along. The way they were in Season 3 of the OG was my favorite and I think it was their relationship with each other that made me love each of them more.

I just think if they're gonna have Barbatos continue to be mean to Solomon, they gotta give him a better reason for it. And if it was only ever meant to be a squabble between friends over something petty, then it should be resolved at this point.

I just want my favorite boys to get along again!

[autumnwhistles]

Introducing Last Life SMP: The Unofficial Musical

“There is an old, old tale to be told

Of green like the spruce, of crimson and gold.”

[Full song list and links under the cut]

NOTE: AUDITIONS ARE OPEN UNTIL NOV 20TH!!!! If you're interested, please check out the #auditions and #info tags for more information.

Those are the first lines sung (...kind of) in a musical adaption of the Last Life SMP I’ve decided to talk myself to write, for... some reason. Please note this is not an actual play and never will be (rights and crediting issues, for one thing, the CCs deserve to take credit for the storyline they’ve made), but I will record, put it together, and upload songs to Youtube in a playlist. Most of the plot is from Last Life itself, and is stated in the songs, so it should be easy enough to follow. There will also be the relevant plot in the description of each song.

My aim is to tell a coherent story through songs (which, because I can’t hold myself back, I’ve planned 45 of...), meaning that I can’t just jump perspectives continuously and chronicle events. This means that some of the CC’s characters are going to have a bigger role than others, though I do want to honour everyone involved, so I’d appreciate any ideas on doing this (especially for Tango and Skizz). However, so far:

It mainly follows Martyn (especially due to his lore, he had the easiest storyline to adapt into a narrative setting, and to me at least was the main character of that season), partially following Scott as the winner as well. They do foil each other quite well this season, which is a bonus – though I am going to be stretching this for the sake of Cohesion^TM.

Important events and important exposition are given to us by the Chorus, keeping the storyline in tact while shifting focuses (Joel going Red, for example). The Chorus are actually Watchers observing the events, which is hinted in the opening song (they sing a lot of references to Martyn’s Last Life teaser, for instance).

This means that Watchers and Listeners are technically canon (especially since we’re following Martyn’s lore), but the names aren’t going to be stated so things can be interpreted differently for people who don’t keep track of/aren’t fans of that. 

Memories of 3rd Life are also canon, as they are in the series.

This follows the headcanon (and out-of-universe truth) that 3rd Life took place in Spring and Last Life in Autumn, so if there are references to that in songs (which they are), that’s why.

Also, though I’ve tried to keep everything as faithful to the events of Last Life as possible (except one confrontation/song that doesn’t happen, to resolve various things), but I do tweak some minor chronological aspects (eg when alliances were established) and omit some things  again for cohesion, and also to help establish information early on.

Progress-wise first song is nearly finished, though I do still need to record it. I have pretty concrete ideas for others, and some I don’t really know yet, but hopefully they’ll be coming out at a steady, if slow, pace. I am somewhat a novice at music production (as in recording and putting tracks together) though, so help with that would be appreciated.

*if you’re not convinced, watch the start of his session 8 until 1:57, he canonically hallucinates his friends and this is due to a sinister entity only he can hear speaking to him and commanding him to follow it even somewhat despite his will, manipulated by promises of bringing back these dead friends. And all this is in his episodes. Main character behaviour, guys. Main character behaviour.

Full song list:

Part 1:

1. Overture/Middle of Nowhere: We’re introduced to the Last Life world by the Chorus as players spawn in. Martyn seems to hear something, but brushes it off.

2. Corners of the World: Through Martyn’s perspective we’re introduced to players and their alliances. He meets Scott and Pearl and chats to them for a while, before heading with them to spawn.

3. “Tales: Record 13″/”The Boogeyman”: At spawn, Grian narrates his experience with BDubs’ Boogeyman curse, and all around the map the players express what they’ve heard about the Boogeyman curse themselves.

4. “A(ha)lliances”: The Southlands ally, making a-ha jokes, and Pearl and Scott solidify their alliance via Pearl gifting Scott a life.

5. “The Table Song 1″: Now some time into the series, the Chorus updates us on the alliances that have formed: the Fairy Fort, Team BEST, Magical Mountain, Scott and Pearl, and the Southlands. It also chronicles the journey of the Enchanting Table, now in Magical Mountain, and the Southlands’ trip to enchant which ends with Scar’s Boogeyman kill.

6. “Our Will Be Done (Precursor 1)”: Martyn hears a mysterious voice speaking to him for the first time, telling him to give Ren some Nether Wart. He does so.

7. “Debts (potentially an instrumental)”: Martyn extinguishes Ren’s burning tower and Ren tells him of his alliance and pledge to Lizzie, reminding him of his time in 3rd Life.

8. “In Spring We Met”: After returning to the Southlands, Martyn thinks about the conflicting loyalties he feels between the Southlands and the remaining ties he feels to Ren, despite it being a new life. As he falls asleep, the voice whispers to him about betraying the Southlands and forming an alliance with Ren to suit its own goals.

9. “Green, Crimson, Gold”: Joel is now Red after an unlucky session, and news of a Red name spreads throughout the server.

10. “The Table Song 2″*: The journey of the Enchanting Table is further chronicled, coming into Scott and Pearl’s possession, who then sell it to Lizzie for a life each, putting Scott up to the same number of lives as Martyn, 4.

11. “Their Dubious Game”: Scott wonders about how trustworthy the rules of the game actually are, prompted by the forced isolation of Red names this time due to their nature contradicting his experiences in 3rd Life with Jimmy, while Martyn, breaching the border with the Southlands, hesitantly wonders the same thing. 

12. “Northern Lament”: Below Magical Mountain, Joel fumes at being distrusted by everyone and isolated purely due to his Red name. Above, Scar muses about being isolated and distrusted for the opposite reason, because of how many lives he has.

13. “A(ha)alliances (Reprise)”: Time passes, and Martyn grows closer to the Southlands. However, he’s still meeting up with Ren who offers to introduce him to Lizzie and the rest of the Fairy Fort, potentially considering a betrayal. The Voice prompts him to accept this, as they can be useful in its plan.

14. “unnamed Wither theme (Instrumental)”: Grian informs the Southlands that Scott and Pearl are in possession of a Wither Skull, expressing his desire to retrieve it. Martyn, Impulse and Mumbo go, Martyn however intending to eventually destroy it because of how unprepared everyone is for a Wither fight.

15. Unnamed Song: After they’re found out by Scott and Impulse and Mumbo flee, Scott informs Martyn that Grian also has a Wither Skull, Martyn immediately gives the skull back, and the two talk about their distrust of Grian and his desire to bring complete chaos to the server. However, that night (post-song) the Voice informs him that its goal is to watch the server burn.

16. “The Table Song 3″: The Chorus further chronicles the Enchanting Table’s journey, now in the Fairy Fort, where two members – Ren and BigB – are chosen as the Boogeyman. Team BEST visits and Bdubs gives a life to Lizzie in exchange, giving enchanting to everyone free of charge. Ren manages to kill a member of Team BEST, Skizz, but BigB has not gotten a kill yet, and the session is nearly over. He catches sight of his closest ally Cleo by the side of Ren’s pit trap.

17. “Green, Crimson, Gold (Reprise)”: Cleo, now Yellow, arrives at Scott and Pearl’s base informing them of BigB’s Boogeyman kill on her, wanting to cut TIES. Scott and Pearl accept (song intro). Meanwhile, Joel is getting desperate for allies, now hunting for Yellows to convert to Red with him. Hearing about Grian’s wither skull, he goes to the Nether, where Grian and Mumbo are building a Ghost farm, and shoots Grian off the edge, turning him Red. BDubs, fighting in the Nether, falls and turns Red too. When heading to Scott and Pearl’s base, a Yellow Cleo is killed by Joel’s trap. 

18. “Friends”: The Southlands are informed of Grian’s death, and, now Red, Grian is to be exiled from the Southlands. He desperately tries to kill Mumbo as Impulse and Jimmy arrive, asking if they can still be friends, while Scott and Pearl mourn the loss of a friendship with Cleo, and Martyn is introduced to the rest of the Shadow Alliance under the gaze of the Moon, giving Ren a life.

Part 2:

1. “Walls”: Grian has been exiled from the Southlands, the stone wall he built separating them. In the Snow Fort, Etho and BDubs build a wall to keep them separate until he can gain a life again. Cleo, wanting vengeance on BigB, meets Scott on the other side of his wall, Scott giving her some sugarcane. Post-song, Grian, Joel and Cleo express their desire to gain lives back from Scar. 

2. “Their Will”: Martyn relays the aims of the Voice, which he now interprets as the Moon, to the rest of the Shadow Alliance, who agree with it.

3. “Die For Me”: In a Shadow Alliance meeting, Martyn asks if there’s anything recent he should know about the Fairy Fort. They tell him the Fairy Fort has burned down at the hands of Cleo, relaying the tale as a flashback (with mainly Cleo singing). 

4. “Promises”/“Coal Mine”: Martyn chases Jimmy, who’s stolen his life in the Southlands life-passing ritual, spurred on by the Voice. He lies to Jimmy, telling him they can run away from the Southlands together if he gives him back his life. Jimmy expresses his worry about potentially being the first out again in the process, as this has happened before and he is very vulnerable as a Yellow, and agrees. Martyn runs back with his life straight after.

5. “The Table Song 4”: Since there are only three of them now, the three remaining Southlanders spend the day together, including sneaking around Team BEST’s snow fort looking for the Enchanting Table and finding a secret entrance. They are caught but let go due to some lies of Martyn’s about their aim, telling them he was simply looking for Ender Pearls.

6. “Unnamed Wither Theme (Song: Precursor)”: During the day, the Southlanders meet Scott, Martyn bringing up the danger of Grian’s Wither Skull as he’s now Red, and they decide to look for it. As Martyn is called away to a Shadow Alliance Meeting, Impulse manages to find it, and entrusts it to Scott. Scott gives it to the Fairy Fort for safekeeping.

7. Unnamed Song: Cleo, now Yellow again, visits Scott and officially joins their alliance. Scott expresses his desire to simply protect his allies and simply live a quiet life in these games, though violence is necessary as a means to this end as he knows the chaos that will ensue.

8. “Tales: The Wizard On The Mountain”: a Yellow Grian rejoins the Southlands, telling them (especially Martyn, as he did not know when this happened due to his absences) how he got a life back from Scar, who’s now Yellow himself. (And yes Grian gets songs where he’s relaying events to others instead of ones of them happening to him because he’s a Watcher hehe, he’s not involved in the action songs he watches)

9. “The Trial of Timmy”: The Southlands hold a trial for Jimmy about whether he should be exiled or stay in. They will anonymously vote their verdict in a book, Grian campaigning for Jimmy to leave, while the others, minus Martyn, campaign for him to stay. When it is time for them to vote, Martyn votes him in.

10. “Our Will Be Done (Precursor 2)”: The Voice is angry at Martyn, asking him why he’s still attached to the Southlands when he wishes to join the Shadow, appearing to him and telling him a demonstration is in order... “Lights extinguish/Begin the Slaughter/Our Will Be Done!”

11. “Unnamed Wither Theme (Instrumental 2)”: Grian manages to gather the three Wither Skulls he needs with the help of Impulse, who wants to stay loyal to his allies and feels regret for taking it with Scott. Martyn, though not active, does not try to stop him, and distracts Team BEST while the other two take it. 

12. “Red, Crimson, Gold (Reprise 2)”: As Grian is distracted by this aim, the other members of the South fall to boogeymen, of which there are six of this session, due to the Voice’s promise. Impulse falls to Yellow at Scott’s hands, and Mumbo and Jimmy both become Red, along with many other players on the server, including Lizzie and once more, Joel.

13. “Friends (Reprise)”: Returning to the Southlands after their mission, Grian, Martyn and Impulse find the South blown up by Mumbo: mourning the loss of the alliance, they mournfully burn the walls in commemoration. Grian and Martyn muse on each other’s untrustworthiness, Impulse remaining loyal to both, as the allyship between Scott, Pearl and Cleo strengthens. Far away, Etho, with Bdubs once again on the other side of the wall, discovers the missing Wither Skull, suspecting the Southlands.

14. Unnamed Song: Martyn and Grian, now the last two Southland members after Impulse is shot by Mumbo in the Nether and becomes Red, mentally comment about their distrust of the other person and about there being something off about them, Martyn due to the Voice’s seeming hatred of Grian and Grian’s apparent apathy to everything apart from causing bloodshed, Grian because he senses something around Martyn (Watcher powers heh) and his relative absence from the Southlands when they were still around, though he does express a wish to protect their last remaining threads of alliance. They express none of this aloud. 

15. “When Will You Learn?, Parts 1 and 2”: Heading back to the Southlands, Grian and Martyn meet Jimmy and Mumbo, who attack them. Grian kills them both, to Martyn’s shock, and shocked himself, tries to defend these actions. All of a sudden, the Voice appears again and a Boogeyman curse strikes Martyn. Prompted by the Voice (seeming to have a specific hatred of Grian) and by vengeance for Mumbo and Jimmy, Martyn immediately moves to kill Grian. He succeeds, but the kill is attributed to Joel, who has sniped him. Exhausted, Martyn managed to kill Tango. When called to another Shadow meeting, he returns to his empty Southlands tower instead.

16. “Unnamed Wither Song (Proper)”: The Wither is raised by Grian and Impulse in Team BEST’s base. Etho wants to run, but Bdubs attacks it, giving him the courage to attack too – however, Bdubs loses a life to it, turning Red once more. The remaining Greens and Yellows flock to fight it as the Reds join in, trying to kill the other players. The Wither is defeated by Etho; Impulse falls to Scott’s hand, dying permanently; Bdubs takes Lizzie’s final life as he was promised a life in exchange for killing a Red; he is shot by Grian as he runs to Etho to inform him of this.

17. Unnamed Song: In the aftermath, Etho mourns BDubs’ death, while Ren mourns his failure to protect his Shadow Queen, even if she was Red.

18. Unnamed Song (and the only one not following ‘canon’ events): With Impulse’s death as a catalyst, Martyn seeks out a Red Grian, proposing a temporary truce for him to explain what's going on. They confront each other about their various actions against the Southlands, and their apparent detachment from it, and talk about their suspicions that the other person knows more than they seem about the nature of the games – as the Voice tries to stop Martyn from inquiring further. Grian says he experiences this alongside his friends as a decision when prompted by Martyn stating he never cared in the first place. He wonders if Martyn would understand the situation due to his position; however, he does not know what Grian is talking about and distrusts him. Angry, Grian leaves, calling Martyn nothing but a follower. Angry, the voices swell around Martyn and he falls asleep.

19. “Our Will Be Done”: Waking up all alone, Martyn hallucinates his friends, before they are revealed as fake, the Voice in their places. He snaps at it, finally asking why they’re doing this. Why are they speaking to him? Why are they hell-bent on killing Grian? What did he mean? Why does he have to follow it when he wants to do the opposite of what they tell him? Who are they – why should he do anything they say? However, they pacify him, promising that if he does what they say, they will bring Impulse, Mumbo and Jimmy back. Martyn concedes.

20. “Scott’s Elegy”: Scott, cursed as the Boogeyman once more makes a decision to surrender himself to the curse instead, as he doesn’t want to kill any more allies with so few lives left in the game.

21. Unnamed Sad Martyn Song: Martyn thinks on Scott’s decision, thinking about what he’d once wanted, everything that’s now impossible as he’s pushed around by the Voices with not enough willpower to say no: he wishes to make choices but cannot, and thinks about Grian’s words. 

22. “Our Will Be Done (Reprise)”: In a meeting of the Greens and Yellows, the Voice tells Martyn to place an End Crystal in the centre as a test for Scott: if he blows it up, he passes, if he doesn’t, he fails. Scott chooses not to, and as Scott turns Red, the voices talking to Martyn become loud and angry, commanding him to kill Scott for disobeying them, yet again promising him the Southlands back if he does. While walking around, Martyn loses his first life to a trap at Grian’s hands.

23. “Boogie Boogie On The Dance Floor”: The Chorus informs us that it is the last day. Pearl is chosen as the Boogeyman, rigging a TNT trap on a disco floor, turning Ren’s red. The others quickly fall to the Reds, including Cleo.

24. “Martyn’s Stand”: Now left as the last Yellow, Martyn decides he is tired of hiding, deciding make a last stand against everyone. At first humming the start of “In Spring We Met” as a comfort, he heads to a mountain and pouring lava down the sides as a beacon for the Reds. However, though he puts up a good fight, he doesn’t manage to take any of them down before dying himself, marking the server entirely Red. 

25. “Battle Royale”: With the Reds having turned on each other, the four survivors – Pearl, Scott, Ren and Martyn – agree to a Battle Royale to decide the victor. Pearl dies early on, prompting Scott to grieve and resolve to win this fight, no matter what it takes. Martyn eventually falls to his own End Crystal. Only Scott and Ren are left, and they fight to the voices of dead players telling them to play the game. After a long fight, Scott manages to kill Ren, partially due to a zombie which he interprets as the world maybe doing something after all for his defiance. He is crowned the winner. However, the Voice does not like this, the Chorus supporting this, and Scott is stricken dead with heavenly lightning.

26. “Plainly Spoken [Epilogue]”: All is silence, and yet Martyn opens his eyes once more, to the Voice and the Chorus, now joined as they are the same entity, informing him how disappointed they are in him, and that he is heading closer and closer to the light. As he asks questions, he is cut off, and they say he will forget all that has happened with them as he and everyone else moves into the next game. Up above, the land is now in the state it was at the start of “Middle of Nowhere”, and they are revealed to be those that run the death loop. 

*This may be later excluded due to not adding much at the moment.

[atthebell]

i do kinda think its very silly for people to be acting like q is the devil and stuff and we all have to run away from this server as fast as we can cuz like. man i feel like everything happening all the time during the lockdown dsmp days have destroyed some of this fandom's ability to be patient and wait for change. :( i dont think ive even seen any major news since pomme and dapper? to me it just seems like stuffs been quiet cuz theyve been cracking down behind the scenes. i dunno it feels kinda sad to hear that so many people are just giving up on something they love when its not even gone yet.

yeah i mean i think deciding it's a foregone conclusion is very stupid, and also i understand being very upset with q because he hasn't been very responsible or diligent (particularly before all of this came out) but also like. you guys understand he was also mega fucked over by this right. like you know that this project is his baby and he wants it to do well and wants to treat people fairly and doesn't want to ruin his reputation with it?? like i don't get thinking he's a mustache twirling villain when that's not how he's behaved at all. and also you're not owed any behind the scenes info!! this is the kind of shit that takes months to work out, it's not going to be resolved immediately, like you said, and i don't think most of it should be public. admins can, have, and will likely continue to speak out about issues, it's not like we're not going to find out if shit keeps sucking and nothing improves, but the actual restructuring should not and will not be public.

have some damn patience!!! i know i sound like a dick when i say that but i'm also miserable about all of this!! i just don't decide to make it a moral issue (in terms of "supporting the server" or whatever) or be a fucking freak weirdo to people because of it. i adore this server, i want it to be better, i want people to be treated well, i want players to be able to come back and tell the stories they want to tell, and waiting for that fucking sucks but it's the only thing to do so long as i still care about it, which i absolutely do.

idfk i'm tired of talking about this whole situation because i think everyone is upset and thinks that justifies everything they want to say and do, including being shitheads to other fans and acting like every cc involved in this is a fucking war criminal, which is how mcyt fans always act when there's any kind of issue (or whatever they view to be a problem). it's tiring and i wish people could be mature about it but apparently that's impossible

[pommunist]

im sorry to dump this in your inbox and if you want to delete it please go right ahead, it obviously invites a lot of discourse that you might not want to involve yourself in, but im so frustrated right now. people just keep passing around the same tired nonsensical arguments to try to discredit lea or any of the admins any way they can just to parasocially defend a fucking COMPANY and its just so stupid. "this shouldve been private" did you miss the fact that this started bc they were attempting to resolve it in private and lea got fired for asking for help from pierre? "lea doxxed quackity" she didnt even mean to and she apologized and deleted the tweet as soon as she realized "lea is xenophobic" over a mistranslation. give it up yall Quackity Studios®️ isnt gonna fuck you

First thing first, Xenophobia should never be seen as a « nonsensical argument », whether or not you believe it was perceived as such because of language difference or anything else.

As for the doxxing thing, people can have their thoughts and talk about it, but I won’t because it’s not directly related to the QSMP situation. What I’m trying to say is that these are serious topics than can be discussed, and also not everyone who raised these subjects used it to discredit the admins experience.

The « should’ve been private » argument tho… I can’t like yes, duh, it should’ve ! However it was not possible since communication seems to be a foreign concept within the higher hierarchy of Qstudios so their fault really. I put this in the same category as the « just be patient » argument, like no sorry what we’re talking about is severe mistreatment and exploitation of workers so lets focus on that instead of telling victims and outraged fans how they should act.

Personally I want to focus solely on the workers rights, the way the issues are being handled by Qstudios, the legal aspects of the problems, and just what revolves around the Qadmins situation in general. I have no interest in discussing the character of any CCs or admins as individuals, peripheral issues or fandom « discourse ». Doesn’t mean I don’t care about it just I don’t want to distract the discussion away from the « main » topic.

So if some people sent me anons that were more focused around the doxxing thing, or around being angry at some people’s reactions and were wondering why I didn’t answer them, that’s why ! No hate to y’all, you are still free to use my askbox as a venting place if you want to, I just hope you can understand why I chose, and will continue to choose, not to answer them ✌️

(edit : if you have genuine questions/are looking for answers about the doxxing situation or something else, hop in my dms rather than send me an anon)

Also anon, that last sentence, while I can see where you come from, let's still stay cordial and respectful !

[mcytshipsandmore]

rah I really didn’t mean to start issues I’m sorry-

anon that talked about respecting cc’s but tumblr is a fan space is actually very correct so uh. s o r r y. If it’d be easier for you to delete the ask I originally sent you could do that. Erm. I wasn’t like trying to rile up something, idk. Yeah idk why I brought that up on tumblr where it’s. Tumblr. Yknow what I’ll just see myself out. I’m very sorry for any and all convenience I have caused right now.

No no you are all good anon. I understand where you are coming from and you genuinely wanted to help. I respect that

Its ok to make mistakes and I'm glad that in the end there's no harm done.

As for everyone else, we have mostly resolved the issue so please dont attack anon for what happened.

-🍫

[xomoosexo]

https://www.tumblr.com/xomoosexo/723237473515372544/my-honest-thoughts-on-will-quackity-fall-i-hope?source=share

i saw the other anon's essay and i don't have anything important to add to it except this:

i wasn't very impressed with Q's attempt to sooth over the drama/hate with the qsmp. his tweets weren't problematic in their wording or message, but it sounded more like customer service than a personal message. which, like, isn't necessarily a bad thing. companies and big projects have PR and these kinds of things. but it made me feel like there was a big disconnect between Q, the people on the qsmp, and the fans. it felt like he was treating it clinically, instead of dealing with friends/people he knew personally. it's the kind of language that's a whole lot of fluff, with enough buzz words to sound important, but it has no actual substance or weight. he didn't actually address anything directly

and, well, bringing up the law degree, and how Q tends to shift the blame or focus onto other people .... yeah, it kind of all adds up. that's exactly the kind of language a lawyer would use, bc they know how to talk their way around a problem :/

idk. lawyers aren't inherently evil or manipulative people, but Q definitely has the skills to avoid the heat and avoid getting cancelled/hated the way other ccs are. it kind of sucks after what he's done to his supposed "friends"

everytime q puts out a statement it literally feels like press release pr statement. all fluff that's meant to satisfy people's need for *a* statement. it doesn't actually matter to people if a conflict is resolved or if a statement has any substance or accountability or resolution. just that they can say the issue is over and addressed. I've also noticed whenever he's congratulating himself it's always I'm so proud of me I'm so proud of my community. but whenever something goes wrong it's always "us at qsmp" "our team" and "we are working on it"

[hermithomebase]

maybe this is recency bias, but i feel like subtwt wars (feels kinda dismissive to call everything thats happening that, but i cant think of another phrase) have never been this bad. like you have such casual and blatant racism, gore, death threats, doxxing, etc., all over something that could have been resolved fairly quickly if q did the bare minimum. i think cc's encouraging their fan's beliefs (whether it's vegetta saying there's nothing wrong with the mod or q's silence over his fans harassing people and refusing to even acknowledge usmp) have definitely worsened everything. they feel empowered to do whatever because its against those evil smilers, and (in their mind) their cc's even support them

i think its been slowly getting worse over the course of like, 2 years but i think its so far past subtwt wars atp-its the same thing with like ranboo and bootwt where when you let bigotry and bad behavior run unchecked these types of horribly racist people make a home for themselves there because they feel empowered to be that way in that space. there will always be racist and bigoted people wherever you go but if you ignore it or encourage it Thats when it gets bad

[enneamage]

Not directly to Generation Loss, but I've been given a lot of thoughts to the younger generation of minecraft streamers and their attempts to do big projects to "break out of" the minecraft mold: obviously, with Ranboo, we have Generation Loss, which seemed to go over well with his fanbase (enough so that he's stated he's thinking of quitting MCC, which is really the only tie he's had to the game for about a year atp), with Tommy, we have his New York vlog series and now his liveshows, and with Tubbo, while still Minecraft-adjacent, we have Tubnet. I'm wondering if you have any thoughts about what would make a cc successful at shifting their core audience into a brand new project that isn't necessarily the type of content that they got famous for. Do the audiences of all three ccs differ enough that they would need different strategies to shift their content? My running theory is that Generation Loss was mostly successful among his fanbase because it played on the tropes that were apparent in his minecraft lore from the beginning: mind control, a protagonist forced to do awful things against his will, a base npc type character that occasionally has overwrought freakouts over their lack of control, etc. It was just in a medium outside of Minecraft.

Meanwhile, Tommy is finding himself in a rut because he can't fully apply his storytelling skills to a non-Minecraft setting (in part because he's focusing more on comedy, and while his fans like his sense of humor, I think, in his lore, they also liked the Marvel-esque main character energy, which doesn't translate when it's just the cc having a huge ego, and the angst) and his vlogs, when they aren't completely on the backburner, seem too formulaic to have their early charm. As for Tubbo, while obviously a minecraft server is, well, minecraft, there wasn't enough "entertainment"/lore/a connection to the streamer to encourage his core audience to play Tubnet, at least not in the form it was released as. In short, I feel traditional mcyt-ers are looking for narratives or entertainment value from these bunch of ccs. Although maybe Lovejoy's success goes against this theory. It just seems like all the younger minecraft streamers have attempted to release a large project within the last year or so, and while that might not be indicative of them trying to leave the fandom, I sense a restlessness in all of them and a wish to move on.

(Okay so this is going under a readmore because it is a long’un)

As of 2023 in a post-lockdown and post-DSMP world I got the sense that a lot of people were restless regarding what to do and where to go next, CC and audience alike. I think that because the DSMP was such a specific time and place in people’s lives it’s inevitable that the majority of people (because those numbers were huge) will have moved on to watching/wanting other things, so retention through sameness may not work, but you’re onto something with the feeling like there’s no in-character story to follow anymore. The thing I poke at from time to time is that there’s no out-of-character plot to follow anymore either, most of the irl narratives have been resolved or brought off-camera so even the RPF people have to scavenge for food.

Lovejoy has a rising star narrative that people can invest in if they want; with them breaking free of associations with mcyt to be treated like serious musicians, and I think it also serves a purpose ofpeople trying to wash off post-mcyt shame in themselves. (“this is Wilbur Soot and this is WILL GOLD” they tweet, as though that is not a literal man onstage performing, but they’ve already decided what they want to believe in.) I’m sensing some misguided stabs to try and not be treated like the bottom of the food chain in the vocal fanbase by desperately trying to push away from the MCYT association, which is probably where those peoples heads are at all around. Most lovenjoyers are fine with it and just enjoy the music because it’s obviously how they got there, but there’s clearly a friction going on.

Ranboo has a kind of watered-down version of that following them. I remember when I first saw someone say very defensively that Ranboo wasn’t an MCYT, they were a variety streamer. Ranboo has been drifting away from MC for a long time, both moving into the variety realm and daydreaming about Genloss. When people win the internet lottery young it makes sense to want to put the money towards a project that they would only be stuck imagining otherwise, and Genloss very much feels like that kind of dream. I would say that Ranboo has successfully pivoted to variety and even completed their first big project, but they’ll need to re-capture that audience every time they make a Generation from now on, which could be hard to do with breaks in between.

Tubbo has also moved into variety streaming, which is kind of a necessity for the hours he keeps. He also has an ongoing love for big projects like Recipe for Disaster. Tubbo’s longterm investment and labor of love was Tubnet, which would have established him as the owner of a server like the one that he used to play on when he was younger. I don’t know what Tubbo’s relationship to storytelling is, I’ve heard he does it on a small scale but he also has a unique love of engineering, which Tubnet was more about. As far as I know there were a lot of things that eventually led to Tubnet’s low player turnout, but one of them had to have been low demand; I remember people saying that there was no use re-inventing Hypixel when Hypixel already had all the Hypixel players. Regardless of if this was fair or not, Tubnet didn’t wind up developing a large player base from his fame, which unfortunately shows that not all attention rolls over equally.

Tommy has been pouring his storytelling skills into writing his live show, which he’s advertising as the best thing he’s ever written as well as his biggest self-disclosure. It’s autobiographical theatre, but also a puppet musical-- we will see what the audience reviews think. Tommy’s been experimenting the most to see that he wants to do next, I know he’s stated that 2022 was a big ‘try’ year for him and he’s also talked about focusing on the quality of viewers over the quantity because focusing on hard statistics made him miserable. I know Tommy doesn’t want to move away from Minecraft, he’s actually very tightly holding on and trying to find ways to love it again, as well as make it worthwhile for audiences. Some of the things Tommy has been saying lately make it sound like he wants to turn back time a bit, recapture what streaming and video gamed used to feel like for him when he was younger, so we’ll see what resonates with the others. There’s a lot of really dense nostalgia around Minecraft (look at these comment sections they’re haunting) and judging from his current taste in video essays he’s got a moderate case of it.

I think the pattern here is marrying the thing that you want to with what audiences want, which is infinitely harder to do than it is to say. Human motivation is fluid and weird, and not many people are going to be able to say what it is they’ll want or like until something or someone is put in front of them. What people want also changes over time, so it can be a bit like chasing the wind or catching an updraft to get in the air when it comes to getting an audience. There’s a formula for the YouTube algorithm, but there’s not a clear map for the less cheap or predictable parts of the psyche. 

Even when you’ve got an audience, when it’s time to pivot over to something completely new it’s kind of time to be a whole new person to them; your function and role in someone’s life is changing. It’s rolling the dice and seeing if you can do and be something that resonates in a new form. People fall out of love with other people all the time, and I think that CCs get the same effect as the seasons change-- sometimes people change and cause a split, sometimes people stay the same and get stale over time. For the same reason that people can be ride or die because a CC is themselves, when someone falls out of love with a cc there’s not much that can make them stay if the rest of the content doesn’t deliver. I don’t see people talk about it at length, but I have seen this image make the rounds so it’s a shared thing.  

Shortest answer is I think there’s no formula that can be divined outside of a retroactive twelve hour video essay breakdown of each individual’s creators strengths and weaknesses, and a matching breakdown of where the audience’s head was at. It’s much easier to look back on something specific and say ‘this is why this worked / didn’t work’ than grind out guidelines beyond ‘avoid making the audience feel completely alienated or betrayed.’ It can really come down to the audience, who can be attracted and put off by people for reasons that seem borderline intangible, like ‘authenticity.’

The good news is audiences need change and newness even if the content they like has a pattern, otherwise they would keep watching the same video. Even channels that make ‘more of the same’ put out a continuation of what they did last time, moving things along or adding to the collection somehow. Whether it’s in-character or out of character or a kind of abstract “I show up to this channel and things I like are on it,” I think people like to be able to make sense of what they’re clicking on so that they keep doing it. As long as the core remains intact, the people who are sufficiently invested in the creator tend to stick around unless life gets in the way.

As for the restlessness, I think that being on the frontier is kind of addictive. Not long ago someone pointed out to me that I had started wondering what the next big thing would be on behalf of the CCs because it’s an interesting question, especially coming off the back of the DSMP blowing up. I think that online can be a very punishing place if you don’t keep up with trends and frontiers since things change so fast, it’s rewarding if you get in early but you’re in danger if you’re left behind. This is actually as true for regular internet users as it is for CCs, think of the strangely potent social shame of using an out of date meme or not being up on the state of The Discourse, you’ll genuinely get punished if you’re too far out of sync with things. We’re in a year that is both hung over on lockdown and desperately trying to get moving again, right in the moment before the answer to what happens next is ‘obvious.’  

[streettealee]

Do I write fanfiction because I genuinely still enjoy the fandom... or am I holding on to something I am long overdue letting go of in favour of finally pursuing my original works full-time? 

Because I adore the TLH cast, truly. But I think I’m exhausted now. All the rants about character endings, themes that did not carry over and arcs that did not resolve, frustration over seeing all the more optimistic views when I’m still raging over the disservice to certain characters -- I think I may be done now. Or maybe just FOR now. Characters can belong to a fandom and interpretations to fan authors, but... they don’t feel like mine anymore. 

Am I here for the community? Is that it? 

It feels wrong to abandon my fics while they remain incomplete. I literally have a full outline for WBITHOM and could tell you what happens in each chapter and what the ending is right now. I’ve just lost the will to write it out in proper form. What does my work mean to anyone anyway? It’s only a wish fulfilment self-insert at the end of the day.

How many times CAN I read about these characters without thinking about what everyone else’s thoughts are, the news of what CC has planned, the fact that TLH has ended and it was kind of a flop no matter how satisfied a large number of people may be and that TWP is next and much more hyped? 

The TSC universe has endless possibilities (I still think about sea faring Shadowhunters thanks to discussions with @thevagabondexpress) and yet it feels kind of like it’s running dry. For me, at least. There are still fanfics I like to read; I just don’t think I can write my own. And I’m not that excited about the future installments to canon. 

CC follows a formula and the only time she truly feels unpredictable is when she pulls the kind of stunts we saw in TLH where characters were killed for shock value, another character acts as a convenient fix-up for the infamous family tree, characters who were supposed to be best friends but didn’t spend enough time together to feel that close at all, red herrings for character deaths everywhere, just... for crying out loud, everything ended a little Too Well, barring Kit’s death and the anticlimactic deaths of our antagonists (Tatiana’s defeat could have been MUCH cooler). What happened to the promise that it’d be more emotional than TID? Sure, I sobbed when Kit died but that was because it was unexpected, unfair, and he reminded me of someone who I cared about. But that was it. I felt so empty after that when I was reading. I got to the end of the novel and while, yes, it was bittersweet -- it just wasn’t satisfying. I was not satisfied.

ChOT felt cheap. I’ll say it. So many plot beats and decisions felt cheap. 

None of my fanfics work to repair any of that. They feel pointless. Why do I bother writing then? My fics change some things -- for instance: Cordelia’s lack of knowledge, letting Matthew actually have something significant and life-changing happen to him in a way that is meant to better his life in the long-term, James actually having more of an identity crisis, him and Matthew having more connection moments -- but does anyone really care about that? I have no idea. 

So, I feel like I’m not contributing anything. Therefore, this is either a “I’m done writing fanfic for now” or “I’m hungry and on my period and something will inspire me when I least expect it and you’ll probably see an update sooner than later”. I don’t know. My fic feels like a lot of effort for very little self-satisfaction. I don’t feel that proud of it or many others I’ve done, if that makes sense.

[dez-wade]

At this point I’m begging blue to be the cursed team so that either:

A) they win and every argument with red fans on twitter (tumblr has been thankfully pretty chill) can be resolved with “well blue had to win or the kids would have died. Did you want the kids to die?”

Or the far more toxic B) they lose and it’s all red’s fault because they were too jaded by a single day’s events (as if they haven’t all suffered bffr) and consumed by their selfish competitiveness to reason with. Like imagine the wailing on twitter when the eye guy goes “wow you guys totally screwed that up you’re terrible” and it’s all their precious favs’ fault.

Obviously want the eggs to live but the chathopping and toxicity from certain corners of the community have been so bad this past week, and that’s coming from someone who watched the DSMP from the beginning.

I can assure you Option B would never happen simply because they would never turn on their favorites. They praise their CC's actions on RP, but condemn the same action if it's done by something else.

They would either say it was very slay of them or blame the admins or literally anyone but them. Especially because the winner can save some eggs, so the popular CC's eggs would be safe and they would have little reason to care about the others.

And in Option A they would just keep saying now they're the better team but Blue had to win because the admins made them to be the cursed ones.

When the fandom gets annoying like this, there's no really saving tbh. You just hope there's an arc that would have little reason that your favorite CC won't interact or have anything to do with the CCs that have an annoying fan base.

That's why Morning Crew was easily the most sacred and chill time.

[dnfaltstream]

if this situation ever gets resolved he needs to stop talking to fans in dms completely something like this was bound to happen

he did say in the twitlonger that he doesn’t reply to anyone anymore and he (and all cc’s) should continue to put up that boundary

[mmorgbio]

Apple egpu games

#APPLE EGPU GAMES FOR MAC#

#APPLE EGPU GAMES UPDATE#

#APPLE EGPU GAMES DRIVER#

#APPLE EGPU GAMES PRO#

#APPLE EGPU GAMES FOR MAC#

It is also sold directly by Apple - a strong appeal for Mac buyers.Īpple didn't stop there with the new MacBook Pros. However, the latter includes many more ports and a far more polished design.

#APPLE EGPU GAMES PRO#

It costs $329, not including a graphics card, so you'd be looking at about $630 including the Radeon Pro 580 card, just shy of the price for BlackMagic's eGPU. Support for those tasks is notoriously poor on macOS, so every little extra bit of performance you can eke will help.Īpple first offered macOS eGPU support earlier this year, and there are a number available, like the ASUS XG Station Pro model. It will also make GPU-intensive tasks like gaming and virtual reality work better, too. Blackmagic Design, for one, said the eGPU can speed up tasks like spatial noise reduction by up to seven times.

#APPLE EGPU GAMES UPDATE#

So who should buy this? If you want to own a MacBook Pro and use video editing and graphics apps like Premiere Pro CC, Final Cut Pro X (with a big caveat, see the update below) and Blackmagic's own DaVinci Resolve 15, then it should be on the front of your mind. The most significant is that the Radeon Pro 580 card inside the eGPU can't be upgraded, so in a couple of years the box might seem doggy compared to the Radeon Pro 680 or whatever comes along next. It should work with any MacBook Pro released after 2016.Īttaching the box will significantly boost the horsepower of a MacBook Pro, but there are a few notable downsides. On top of that, you get four USB3 ports, two Thunderbolt 3 ports and an HDMI 2.0 port, letting you plug in a 4K monitor and other accessories, and even charge your laptop. The Thunderbolt 3 connection will let you plug in LG's Apple-approved LG Ultrafine 5K display, BlackMagic says.

#APPLE EGPU GAMES DRIVER#

It also doubles the performance of the Radeon Pro 560X in the latest MacBook Pro, and since the same card is used in the 27-inch iMac, driver support should be rock-solid. That puts it nearly on par with NVIDIA's 6GB GeForce GTX 1060, and the extra 2GB is hugely valuable for 3D modeling and other productivity chores. It's a strong sign that it hasn't given up on the creators that are most passionate about its products.īlackMagic Design's eGPU connects to any Mac with a Thunderbolt 3 port, and packs a Radeon Pro 580 with 8GB of DDR5 graphics memory. It unveiled a Thunderbolt 3 external GPU (eGPU) it co-designed with BlackMagic Design for $700, which is a reasonably competitive price next to other third-party models. But Apple also did something pretty canny. The top-of-the-line model, which starts at $2,799, offers less than half the graphics performance of the $2,399 Razer Blade, for instance. The new MacBook Pros with eighth-generation Intel CPUs help, but many folks still aren't thrilled. Last year, VP Craig Federighi admitted that they "designed ourselves into a bit of a corner" with the Mac Pro, and vowed to release a model this year (it now says it won't come until 2019). Such complaints have made it to the ears of Apple brass. Many of Apple's most passionate fans are journalists, programmers and high-profile designers who are loud on social media when they like and dislike what Apple is doing. Many see the MacBook Pro's Touch Bar as a consumer gimmick, and worse, Apple's top-end laptops have failed to keep pace technologically with powerful, well-designed PCs from Microsoft, Dell and others. Now, content creation pros and designers are falling out of love with Apple. For years, they were widely loved by creative folks and influencers because they were simpler and more powerful than Windows PCs. Even though Apple makes a lot more money on iPhones and iPads, Macs are still crucial to its bottom line.

[the-final-sif]

A03 and the SMP Problem

Hello Tumblr!

If you've been a fan of any major SMP for the past however long, you may've noticed that we've got something of a problem on A03. For reasons unknown to me, SMPs are constantly categorized as Video Blogging RPF. Characters on the SMP are forced to share a tag with their content creators and be listed as RPF even when that isn't accurate and makes tagging complicated. Worse, if a content creator plays more than one character, both characters are merged into the cc tag. Which is incredibly confusing, and hard to follow tags for.

In the past, I've contacted A03, and gotten this reply:

Thank you for writing in about Dream SMP. We are currently reviewing the Dream SMP situation and having discussions about creating a Dream SMP fandom tag. The tag wranglers will look into other servers of similar types in the future. If an SMP is canonized, all fandom tags that clearly reference the server will be moved over to the new canonical tag. There are a number of issues we need to work through before we can do so, including ensuring that users are aware the tag is for Dream SMP members, not for other Minecraft streamers. While we can't promise that all the issues can be resolved, please do know that we are doing our best to resolve them.

Now, I was hopeful when I got this message back in November that changes would follow. However, we are now at well over 5 months past, and there's still no changes for any tags. Tags keep getting wrangled and forced into categorizations.

A03 is a fandom space, it is supposed to be by fans for fans, and it's ridiculous that a huge chunk of fandoms, including Dream SMP, Hermitcraft, Last Life, Empires, and more are forced into RPF tags that aren't remotely accurate or reflective of the works. It sucks for the people writing about the SMP, and it sucks for the people writing actual RPF. Series like Critical Role or The Adventure Zone don't have their actors listed, so why should SMPs be forced into the RPF tags?

Thusly, I would like to propose a coordinated campaign to put pressure onto A03 to create proper fandom tags for SMPs, separate from RPF tags, and with separated tags for characters and content creators. I think that a show of support for this change would help demonstrate how many people are currently being effect, and that this isn't something that can just get brushed off. They need to see how many fans are actively upset about this failure of tagging. At the very least, we deserve a public statement with what's going on and the timeline for fixing this problem.

If you're interested in participating in this campaign, my proposed dates are May 1st - May 7th.

During this period, people can, and should:

Send polite, constructive, messages to A03 support requesting:

Separate tags for SMPs and RPF, for fandom and for characters.

Separate tags for characters on SMPs, with character tags only using usernames/character names, not the names of content creators.

Separate tags for distinct characters played by the same content creators.

Reblog and create posts discussing this issue on social media. Encourage your followers on different platforms to reach out to A03 and ask them to fix the mistagging. You can use the tag #SMPsNeedTagsToo on any platform to help spread the word.

Within this tag, it would also be lovely if lists of SMPs that need this change could be created, as well as a list of characters + other tags that will need to be split from the RPF tags. These lists could also be sent to A03 to make the process of splitting easier.

If you are already planning to post a chapter or fic on A03 during this period, consider including an author's note encouraging your readers to reach out to A03.

Remember to remain polite! This is not a harassment campaign, A03 is an amazing website, and the point of this is to call attention to the issue and improve the website we love. Not drag it down.

Equally, please do not be nasty or judgemental towards RPF readers/writers. We're not trying to shame anyone for what they're reading or writing, we just want to have proper categorization so people can post their works correctly!

If this is something that interests you, reblog this post to spread the word, and when May 1st rolls around, get started! If you have questions, feedback, or suggestions, feel free to add on to this post or send me an ask!

[angeloncewas]

Okay, I wasn’t gonna say anything more, but while we’re all still kind of on the subject I want to talk about the creator-fandom divide and mental health.

New media (streamers and the like) are in a unique position. Not quite celebrities, not quite ordinary people - it’s been really interesting to see how different creators navigate their fanbase. MCYTs especially have a smaller gap between the two parties, and this may be an unpopular opinion, but I don’t think those connections are inherently bad. I think recognizing both ends of the spectrum as more than formless entities - the cc as a person and the fans as individuals in turn - humanizes all of us. 

Where it comes to be a problem is when either side steps over this wobbly line in the sand. And I don’t think this is a “creators need to be more firm with their fanbase” or “dumb kids being indoctrinated” scenario. There’s a lot more nuance than that. This is a culture-wide shift that needs to be adjusted at the root. I’m not sure if that’s actually possible, but my point is that no single person is at fault, nor can they fix this.

Ranboo, the other day, said that he’s not a therapist. And he’s not. He only graduated high school last week (which isn’t a bad thing, it just speaks to his qualifications) and yet people’s responses to that disclaimer were “yes you are.” And I am aware that they don’t mean that literally - they don’t think he has a therapy license and they don’t expect him to cut them off at 55 minutes and tell them to check in at the front desk - but it’s the same kind of concept as when a person donates to a streamer and tells them “you saved my life.”

Here’s the thing: I understand that feeling. I do. However I may sound, I’m not some jaded anti-fandom. I don’t think it’s something that we talk about often for a variety of reasons, but there has been media that saved my life. Hell, there’s been content creators that saved my life. There was a point where I watched an insane amount of Good Mythical Morning because every single thing I did triggered me except for their videos. During that time, their channel was pretty much all that kept me going.

The difference is that I didn’t tell them that. It never even crossed my mind to. After reading A Little Life, I didn’t call up Hanya Yanigahara to tell her that her novel changed the way I see the world. I haven’t ever told Wilbur that his album spoke to me in a way no other has. I don’t plan to ever do those things and I don’t think anyone should. I think the impact of content on a consumer ultimately does not and should not have anything to do with its creator.

I understand the temptation. It’s like a thank-you, almost. A measure of how much they’ve done for you. In a way, on a smaller scale, it’s the same thing with calling a cc a “comfort creator.” I have those. We all have those, even the creators themselves. But telling them about it places some kind of mantle of responsibility on them. Instead of being able to do what they love and having it leave a positive impact on the world, now they are forced to be aware of the lives supposedly hinging on everything they do when they have their own life to live.

For the fan, this leads to stuff like unrealistic expectations. That demand for the creator to be aware of the same things you are and have the same opinions you do because they are that important to you. I get it, I do, but that’s just not sustainable. If someone like Schlatt, for example, bothers you enough that it upsets you to see your favorite ccs interacting with him, you need to decide whether the content out-values his presence. And if you can’t, you have reached an issue that needs to be resolved.

Existence is made better by good media. For people with limited resources, emotional outlets, etc, it can even be vital. And while you do need to find other things in your life that are important to you, sometimes all you can do is keep moving forward, and that’s (again, in my opinion), fine. But people in this fandom (and other fandoms, I’m sure) need to learn to appreciate the wall that exists between them and the people they look up to. However small the gap, it’s there. It will always be there. And that’s a good thing for everyone involved.

I’m not here to pull a Ludwig and tell you that the people you watch are not your friends. I think we all know that. But there’s more layers to a connection than friendship and not-friendship. There’s a trend of succumbing to investment in a creator on a personal level that is only going to hurt you. It’s a fine line to walk, for sure, because I’m not one of those people who spouts off the word “parasocial” at any opportunity and like I said, I think some amount of human understanding is a good thing.

The problems lie in this grey area of what “too-personal” means, and while I can’t dictate your life, nor is it my place to, I think that’s something important to keep in mind.