#but like.... suddenly i struggled to remember how to roll or attack or switch skills

[katyspersonal]

Okay so, this evening I said that I am not going to bed until I make a progress in Elden Ring because I've abandoned the quest to finally beat it

.....it is 5 AM now 🙃 fhghfhh

Okay, but I actually went SOMEwhere? I let Melina burn herself (oof..), met Maliketh (Val warned me to not kill him just yet), went all the way down to Erdtree, finished Milicent's quest and met Malenia (even get to her 2nd phase xd) So yeah, night well spent! Three things though:

1) I had no, I mean NO fucking CLUE at ALL that Gowry apparently was something like Shabriri; the guy that transcended the bounds of having a body and now switches 'vessels', and has no balls capacity to "fuckin do it yourself then, if you're so darn smart" about the power they preach, but does try to pitch a Lord/God for it in someone else. Incredible. I want to thank everyone who never talked about Gowry, because I appreciated the plot twist :')

2) The flower before we find Malenia is confusing, because, yeah, the clothes set found near it is the same as the one five sisters wear.. I am more leaning towards the idea that there was another person like Milicent that bloomed 🤔

3) I kind of expected a bit... worse, from her fight? Honestly, that slashing swords attack (Waterfall Dance, if I am not mistaken?) could have lasted just a bit less long, but I think otherwise she is manageable? I tried a few things and figured to keep her at enough distance to reliably attack with Starcaller Cry (Radahn's swords), since it will also often throw her off her feet, and for the second stage I summon a spirit ash for distraction and start spamming glintstone spells and pray she doesn't notice me gfhhhfjh Basically, it depends on my luck whether she will slash in stage 1 or not and on my ability to react at her moves fast enough. Can't say whether strength+int built is simply good or I am too tired for gamer rage though 🤔

But yeah, hopefully I will get through this battle in the next episode of fucking around and finding out xd

[buckyodinson]

Random request for Mobius.

Can u do one where the reader has been self harming and Mobi finds out and the reader works themselves up into a panic attack.

Its find if u dont wanna do it, I completely understand, it would just rly help me rn.

Hope this helps you somewhat, my lovely 💛 always around to talk if you need it

Warnings: mentions of self harm

Reader is gender neutral (unless I’ve missed anything - if so, please let me know and I’ll change it)

-

You and Mobius were dealing with a variant who was particularly skilled with knives, and you’d both already shed your TVA issue blazers in the scuffle after receiving a few slashes each. Mobius had made a show of rolling up his sleeves during a lull in the fight, making some snarky comment to the variant as he did so. Subconsciously, you copied him, smirking at his antics as you did so.

The variant moved as if to lunge for Mobius but switched back and jumped at you instead, and managed to slash you across the forearm and kick you away. As you struggled up onto your knees, you watched as rage filled Mobius’ features and he launched himself at the variant, swinging his baton and pruning them.

He bent down to pick up his tattered blazer, panting as he pulled a handkerchief out of the breast pocket.

“Here, let me.” He spoke breathily and gave you a lopsided smile as he reached for your bleeding arm.

You started to extend your arm, but quickly retracted it, pulling it back against your stomach, “No it’s fine. I can deal with it when we get back.”

It was too late though. He’d already seen the marks littered across your arm. Damn him and his excellent observation. You froze once you noticed the sympathetic look cross his face.

You felt your heart start hammering in your chest, and the air around you felt like it was disappearing. You couldn’t deal with this right now. You had to leave. You wanted Mobius to see you as a strong agent. Worthy of being his partner. You didn’t want him to know about this. He’d think differently of you. He’d treat you different. Like you were fragile. Like you were weak. You didn’t want that.

You quickly pulled out your Tempad, opening a timedoor back to the TVA and wasting no time, stepping through it immediately. Mobius didn’t hesitate, following you through.

“Wait up, sunshine, please.” Mobius begged as he followed close behind you.

You picked up the pace, but Mobius caught up with you easily and overtook you, coming in front of you and forcing you to stop, “Talk to me, sweetheart.”

The tears brimming in your eyes fell freely and you began to shudder as your breathing became ragged.

Mobius looked like a deer in headlights for a second, not knowing what to do. Then he silently grabbed his Tempad out of his pocket, opening a timedoor and walking the both of you through it slowly.

Through your teary eyes, you noticed you were now in a TVA apartment. Generally, they all looked the same, but you knew it was Mobius’ from the pile of jet ski magazines on the coffee table in the middle of the room.

Mobius gently ushered you to the tiny sofa and sat you down on it, “Is there anything I can get you? Do you want tea?”

You calmed your breathing enough to utter a strangled “water, please”.

Mobius jumped up and jogged over to the small kitchenette and poured a glass of water for you. He rounded the sofa (almost tripping in the process which did make you giggle slightly) and handed you the glass softly. You muttered your thanks as you raised the glass to your lips and took a sip.

After sipping at it for a few minutes, you had calmed down significantly. Mobius sat waiting patiently, wringing his hands in his lap worriedly.

You took a deep breath and reached to put the glass down on the coffee table, wincing at the pain in your arm, suddenly remembering what got you into this mess in the first place. And the mess it was currently making too.

“Gosh, I’m sorry Mobius. I’m bleeding over everything.”

“Don’t worry about that, sweetheart.”

He tentatively reaches out for your arm again, and you let him take it this time. He dips his handkerchief into what’s left of your water and wipes at the cut carefully.

“If you don’t want to talk about it, I completely understand,” his voice is the softest you think you’ve ever heard it, and if that didn’t tip you over the edge, then his words most definitely did.

“But I hope you know that I’m always here for you, no matter what. And I’ll never judge you, or think any less of you for this,” he finishes his work, dropping the handkerchief to the table, but still keeping a soft grip on your arm, “if anything, I think more of you right now. The fact that you put on a brave face for me and everyone else here when you ain’t feeling so brave inside.”

You didn’t realise how much you’d started to cry until he reached up and brushed the tears from your cheeks, “Thank you Mobius. You have no idea how much that means to me.”

“You don’t have to thank me, sunshine. I’d do anything for ya.” He gives you his lopsided smile again and you can’t help but reciprocate it. And his grows even bigger at the sight.

“There we go.” He beams when you let out a small chuckle and shuffle closer to him.

He moves to envelope you in a hug but hesitates, only continuing after seeing your shy nod. He wraps his arms softly around you, pulling you against his chest and placing a kiss on the top of your head, manoeuvring you both so you’re laying down across his sofa.

He finds himself whispering little words of affirmation into your hair as you both lay there, only admitting that he loves you once he’s sure you’ve fallen asleep.

[cipheress-to-k-pop]

Hospital Visit

Pairing: Sam Alexander x Reader

Word Count: 2.3K

Warnings: None

Summary: Peter’s doctor is a total babe, according to Sam, the perfect reason to pursue her, even if that means faking an injury.

Author’s Note: This would’ve been posted sooner if I could think of a good title. I still don’t think it’s that great but I can’t have this in my drafts any longer or I will scream.

As a medic in training, you were only allowed to treat the agents who had superficial injuries on your own. It helped you gain experience and also gave you the confidence to treat someone if you were faced with a situation where there were too many patients for the senior healers to handle.

The lack of responsibility was of course because of your age. Being sixteen, people didn’t really think you could handle yourself or do anything beneficial for a patient. But you had seen more bloodshed as a child that you knew how to handle many things in an operating theatre.

S.H.I.E.L.D. found you when you were barely through puberty, working as a medic in your father’s underground fight club. You treated a lot of the fighters and they were surprised at your level of skill for a young girl.

They gave you an opportunity to live a life, which was more than your father had. To him you were always just a nurse, but S.H.I.E.L.D. gave you an opportunity to go to school, even make a living from working on the Helicarrier. You were a child in their eyes and it had been a while since you felt so.

You didn’t have to go through the stress or difficulties that a doctor went through on a regular day. However, there were those days where the lights began flashing red and it was all hands-on deck while patient after patient passed through the door, being injured in an alien attack. Or a super-villain attack. Or a corrupt-organization-that-was-trying-to-destroy-Nick-Fury attack.

It was never just a case of the common cold.

But I guess that’s what would make your job interesting. You couldn’t speak for the spandex-clad, super-powered, adrenaline junkies that called themselves superheroes but your job had enough excitement for you.

So much so that you swore one day they’d be treating you for a heart attack.

However, you learned to be less surprised whenever there was a sudden need for medics. Of course, you were more likely to treat those with the superficial wounds, that usually consisted of the superheroes and you were usually in charge of Spiderman, who you had grown comfortable with to call your own patient.

The other medics knew this and so they would always send him your way, unless it was bad, which it never was. Spiderman was reckless, but luckily for him he never got badly hurt.

That was such a case today, the team had gone after the sinister 6 and quite frankly gotten their asses handed to them, landing themselves in the medical bay.

“Hey Peter.” You smiled at the boy lying on the bed once you came in, looking at the clipboard in your hand. He was pretty lucky, he came out relatively unscathed as compared to his teammates, only with a few bruises and cuts, but luckily nothing was broken.

You couldn’t imagine how. Especially when they were getting thrown around like rag-dolls.

“Take off your shirt and we can get to the stiches; I’ll be right back.” You told him, heading to get your cart.

“Psst, Web-head!” Sam called from the bed beside him and Peter turned with a raised brow.

“Switch with me!”

“What? Why?”

“Cuz your doctor is a total babe.”

“I wouldn’t recommend that. (Y/N) really doesn’t like it when something messes up her flow.” That was a total lie. You usually just went with the flow, but Peter saw no advantage in telling him that.

Sam rolled his eyes in response, leaving his bed and bringing the medical report along with him, “I’ve been wanting to talk to her for a month now. You have to let me have this.”

“What’s in it for me?” Asked Spiderman, folding his arms in a smug way and leaning back against the pillow.

“I’ll do your share of next 10 mission reports.”

Peter practically leaped from the bed, “Sold! Good luck lover-boy!”

The two switched quickly before you had returned, swapping medical reports as well and you returned with your medical cart, setting it up without realizing that your patient had changed.

“Okay Pete, let’s see what—You’re not my patient.” You blurted, slightly confused and you rechecked the room, confirming that it was in fact the cubicle you were assigned.

“Where’s Peter?”

“Oh, he asked for another doctor.” Sam explained, watching your brows furrow in concern. A brief wave of insecurity flashed through you. Were you not competent enough?

“It’s not ‘cuz of you!” He was quick to explain, “He just though the other doctor was hot.”

With a raised brow you looked down the aisle and locked eyes with Spiderman who grinned and waved at you.

“...He thinks Dr. Sanders is hot? Does Peter know he’s married? And straight?”

Sam just shrugged innocently and you sighed, grabbing the report and doing a once-over. Nothing too bad, a bruised rib, and a few shallow cuts that needed dressing.

“Alright, hum, Mr. Alexander, I need you to take your shirt off so I can dress your wounds. Would that be okay with you?”

You didn’t miss the way his face turned red at your words and you almost chuckled. He shyly began to take off his uniform and you turned away, giving him privacy and began taking out the dressing and antiseptic.

“You can call me Sam, we’re around the same age anyway.” He muttered, face still alarmingly red and you nodded, sending him a reassuring smile.

The two of you sat in silence as you dressed his wounds, telling him to come back whenever the bandages have gotten soiled so you can re-dress them.

“You might want to lay back on the physical activity for a week or so, to let your rib heal and make sure you don’t open any of the cuts. You can come back after a week and we can see if it’s healed enough on its own or if we’ll have to interfere.” You told him, taking off your gloves and discarding them, along with some other waste.

“If you have any pain or trouble breathing then come see me and I can give you some pain medication or assign you some respiration therapy.”

He nodded carefully and whatever doubts you had of him not listening faded and you smiled, pulling open the curtains that surrounded the bed, “Well then, nice meeting you Sam, I hope you get well soon.”

His eyes widened. That’s it? That got over way too soon! He never even got the chance to make you fall for his undeniable charm. He had to think of something. Fast.

“W-Wait!”

You halted in your steps, turning around to face the hero, “Do you need anything?”

“Um, yeah! I have a pain! Like a really bad pain, right here.” He said, pointing vaguely to his chest and you frowned, looking at the report once again.

“Your CT doesn’t show anything about an issue with the heart. If it’s with the mudcle then why didn’t you say anything earlier?”

“I thought it would go away so I didn’t say anything but it’s, um, become a lot more painful.”

“Okay, let me have a look then.” You said, pulling on a pair of gloves and coming closer to him. His ears started turning red just from your presence.

Sam had the biggest crush on you ever since he saw you the day the Helicarrier had gone down. You were rushing to gather whatever supplies you could, knowing you’d have to treat the survivors after the attack of Zodiac.

He had tried to get you out of there but you refused, trying to gather whatever you could and stuffing it into your bag before you absolutely had to leave.

“I’m trying to save you!” He had shouted at you, frustrated that you kept struggling in his grip, and told him to get the others out.

“And I have to save countless others! But I can’t do any of that without supplies!” You replied, not even taking a second to stop your work. He sighed but eventually listened, rushing to help all the other agents out of the Helicarrier. The Helicarrier had turned on its side by the time.

You shrieked, losing your grip and you slid down. You tried to hold onto something, anything but it was all in vain as you eventually dropped towards the bottom.

You took a deep breath and shielded your head, trying to angle your body into a safer angle before you felt yourself floating.

Your eyes slowly fluttered open, you hadn’t realized that you had screwed them tightly in fear but the first thing you saw was a blue glow and then you were moving so fast you couldn’t see anything.

Before you knew it, you were on the shore. You couldn’t afford to be discombobulated and instead to opened your bag, getting to the nearest patient and handing the supplies to your senior who had been doing First Aid.

“I never did get to thank you.” You whispered, trying not to startle him suddenly as you gently pressed your fingers to where he was saying was hurting. 

He froze before relaxing, “I didn’t think you remembered.”

“Of course, I would. You saved my life.” You argued, brows furrowing when you didn’t see any reaction from him as you pressed down onto the muscle. He didn’t so much as flinch.

“And you’ve saved countless others. I should be thanking you.” He replied and you were grateful that he wasn’t looking at you so he couldn’t see your cheeks turn red.

“It’s nothing compared to what you do, I don’t think I’d ever be able to have enough courage to run around fighting villains. You’re very brave.”

He shook his head firmly, “Don’t sell yourself short, you have enough confidence for other people to put their lives in your hands.”

“I don’t do much.” You murmured, embarrassed. You had long forgotten that you were supposed to be checking for any injuries, instead focusing on his chest and your eyes settled on his muscles.

He wasn’t anything too special but it certainly wasn’t didn’t hurt to look either.

“You do a lot, more than others and that’s what’s important. You don’t have to be a superhero to be a good person.” He said and you found yourself stilling. He was right. You didn’t really expect something so deep to come out of his mouth since, according to peter, he could have his head filled with air and nothing would change.

“I guess you’re right,” You said, peeling off your gloves, “There isn’t anything wrong with you, Sam. I don’t know why you were trying to feign an injury but I’ll give you the benefit of the doubt.”

Your teasing tone brought a smile to his face when he thought he might end up in trouble. It didn’t stop his face from turning red.

“Would you, um, want to hang out with me sometime? Like a date?”

Your face turned and his heart sank, “As much as I would, it’s unprofessional for a doctor to date a patient.”

“And if I were to switch back with Peter? And never ever get treated by you again?” His face was so hopeful and vulnerable at the same time. The smile you sent him was enough of an answer.

The grin he sent you had butterflies erupting in your stomach.

“I’ll be right back!”

In the end, Sam had to do 20 of Peter’s mission reports, along with 20 of his own, but they were all worth it when he saw the smile you sent him as you exchanged numbers.

Oh yes, it was all worth it.

5 YEARS LATER

“Sam would you calm down? You look like you’re gonna jump to the ceiling.” Peter said, amused as Sam’s eyes continued to dart around the airport like a meercat.

Peter was completely taking advantage of today. Sam was so distracted that any comments he had completely flew over his head, giving Peter the freedom to spit as many insults as he wanted.

Sam wasn’t the least bothered. He was too distracted. His eyes locked onto the gate where he saw all the passengers leaving and he bounced on the toes of his feet trying to see above the damn crowd.

Who was he waiting so anxiously for? Of course, it was his girlfriend who was coming back to New York for summer. Her university had generously given 2 months of vacation before the next year and he was going to take full advantage of those 2 months.

You had gone to Medical School to get officially certified so you could perform operations and other such things legally, unlike how you had been doing so the past few years.

It was only a few more years until you were completely qualified (in the eyes of the law) to perform trauma surgery, which was the field you were going to specialize in.

Between you studying non-stop and him saving the world non-stop, you never had the time to see each other. That didn’t stop him from flying out sometimes, for coffee dates.

But this time you would be coming home and he would have 2 months of your undivided attention. The mere thought of that had a grin forming on his face, so wide that his cheeks hurt.

As soon as he saw you, his heart leapt out of his chest as he waited for you to make eye contact with him. Sure enough, your eyes did scan the crowd and you did manage to overlook him a couple of times due to the crowd but once you caught sight of him there was nothing stopping you from bolting towards him.

It was kind of awkward because you were lugging your suitcase behind you but that was the last thing you cared about once you were enveloped in his arms and you sighed in the feeling of home.

“I missed you so much.” You muttered, holding onto him tightly and he did the same. Maybe you were causing a scene but that was hardly any of your worries as you burrowed yourself closer to him.

“Right back at you.” He said breathlessly, pressing kisses to your clothed shoulder. It felt so good to be home.

“Are you two gonna move anytime soon? Cuz I have a movie to catch.”

You groaned, “Piss off, Parker!”

This is the second one-shot where I ended it with Spidey getting yelled at...maybe this is just gonna be my thing?

[withyounct]

What’s wrong kid? (9)

Reader x Single dad!Jaehyun

Genre: Fluff, Angst

Words: 3.2k

Prompt: You notice a child crying at a school playground. You decide to see what’s up and meet an extremely stressed/extremely handsome father.

Prev | Next

A/n: tw// panic attack 

The religion aspect of Christmas wasn’t something you were necessarily into, but the aesthetic was something you were a slut for. Every year, you would spend an outrageous amount of money for the holiday. This year was no different. With Christmas Eve approaching in just a few days you were on what your friends would like to call “crazed mode”.

Jaehyun was “gifted” the experience at the early dawn the next day. The minute the sunlight pierced through the blinds you were awake mercilessly pinching at Jaehyun’s cheek.

“Wake up we have things to do.” You whined cutely, smushing his cheeks playfully. Half asleep he wrapped arms around you to keep you in place.

“Calm down. It’s too early.” He slurred; voice heavy with sleep. Gently, he tugged your head down to his chest, rewrapping the covers you pulled off your bodies in your excitement. Tickling his side, you wormed yourself free. Knowing Jaehyun wasn’t the type to fall back asleep, you skipped out the room and to Hyunjin’s room. Cautiously, you opened her door laughing at her strewn plushies on the floor, her body contorted in an awkward position.

“Hyunjin~” You sang as you shook her awake. Whining, she buried herself in her pillow looking up slightly to check the clock on her wall.

“Y/n it’s early.” She pouted, pulling the covers over her.

“You are your father’s daughter.” You snickered. You picked her up, covers and all, and walked down the hall to her bathroom. You placed her down and ruffled her crazy bed hair. Giving her a light push, you told her to get ready for the day. Wrapping her cover around yourself, you walked back to her room to carelessly toss it back on her bed, silently reminding yourself to make it later before you leave. You loudly announced to the house that you were making breakfast as you walked to the kitchen.

After about twenty minutes, Jaehyun and Hyunjin filtered into the kitchen freshly showered and considerately more awake. Hyunjin now more in tuned with the world around her was excited for the day ahead. Jaehyun walked over placing a kiss on your cheek, complaining he could have helped with breakfast.

“It’s okay. I have way too much energy.” You laughed off, reciprocating the kiss.

“I see. It’s quite terrifying.”

“Very.” Hyunjin said under her breath. Squinting at her you chased her around the kitchen. Jaehyun laughed, but made no attempt to save her as he walked around you two to take the plates to the dining room.

Catching Hyunjin, you lifted her laughing figure and sat her down at her chair.

“Okay Ms. Excitement, what’s the plan for the day?” Jaehyun asked. You were mid-bite when you looked up confused at him.

“Plan?”

“Yes love. What time do you want to head out? What’s the first thing you want to do? When and where is lunch? Do you wan-”

“Whoa there Mr. Structure.” You fed him a piece of toast to stop him. “Ever heard of going with the flow.” You laughed.

Hyunjin very quietly commented “sick burn” and you fist bummed her as Jaehyun finished chewing.

“Okay then, I hand off the day completely to you two.” He leaned back in his chair. The smile that worked its way on your face was that of a cheshire. “I’m going to regret that aren’t I?

“Yep.”

Getting ready after your shower was easy since half of your wardrobe was there. It was cold and snowing out, so Jaehyun took precautions and wrapped you and Hyunjin in ridiculously large scarfs.

When he said the festival was right by his office he wasn’t kidding, it was literally the next street over. Exiting the car you looked back to see the building in the distance. The park was more packed than you expected, but you forgot to factor that literally every school was out for that holidays as children and adults alike ran around. The snow was a comfortable fall and you basked at the scenery. The smell of hot chocolate wafted in the air, the distance blow of the replica polar express train chimed, laughter heard from everywhere.

Hyunjin expressed that her first mission was to hunt down Santa. The look of fire in her eyes wasn’t something to take lightly of.

Wrapping your arm around Jaehyun’s forearm, you brought Jaehyun down to your level. “Why do I feel like she’s going to fight Santa?” You whispered.

“Because she will. He/I messed up last year. I’ll tell you later.” He whispered back. “Oh look Hyunjin a candy shop!” He exclaimed in an attempt to distract her. He picked her up and held your hand, walking you both to the little gingerbread house a few feet away.

Once inside you struggled to undue your scarf since the store owners decided to raise the heater to levels that would make hell jealous. After you were able to breathe you held Hyunjin out of hers. Since it was a small store and Jaehyun could see over the shelves, Hyunjin was allowed to run around to her heart’s content.

“I thought Hyunjin knew you bought her Christmas gifts?” You asked dropping all the gummy worms on the shelf into your basket. Jaehyun sent you one amused judging face before chuckling.

“She thinks it’s a collab between the parents and Santa because there are so many kids in the world. So, he gets half what the kid wants and their parents get the rest. I have no idea where she got that from, but I decided to roll with it. He forgot one of her gifts and she has “ words for him” direct quote.”

“Poor guy that Santa suit is going to get an earful.” You laughed apologetically. Hyunjin skipped back over to you two, basket filled with about the same amount of candy as yours.

Jaehyun looked between you two in disbelief. “That’s way too much candy.”

You got down to Hyunjin’s level and mustered up your best puppy dog pout, Hyunjin following suit. Not even a second later Jaehyun was whipping out his card. Behind him you and Hyunjin shared a high five.

Successfully wrapped up again you exited the store.

“What’s next?” Hyunjin asked rocking back and forth on her heel.

“I know the owners of the ice rink made an outdoor skating rink somewhere passed the lake if you want to check it out.” You looked between the two. Without a second thought Hyunjin yelled yes and grabbed you and Jaehyun’s hand. She got mid step before realizing she didn’t know where exactly she was going. Chuckling, you copied her actions and pulled the two further into the festival.

Jaehyun was skating around with Hyunjin while you sat down on one of the benches. You couldn’t help but smile as you watched Hyunjin pull her clumsy father around. Every now and again you would take a picture saving it and sending them to the group chat Jaehyun’s friends created with you.

“You have such a beautiful family.” An elderly lady who was sitting next to you chimed. You glanced between her soft smiled and Jaehyun and Hyunjin. A blush quickly spread across your face.

“Oh they’re not um I mean I’m not.” You fumbled. “I- Thank you.” You ultimately said face hot with the embarrassment of how flustered you were.

Thankfully Hyunjin skated towards you loudly complaining that she was tired of pulling her dad around and that she wanted to skate with you. You looked back at a tired defeated Jaehyun and laughed. He was happy to trade off with you as you switch places.

You and Hyunjin played around for a while, successfully showing off your skills and impressing on lookers. Hyunjin expressed that she was getting hungry, so you gave skating a rest and returned back to Jaehyun.

It was just reaching the afternoon, so you suggested to grab something light since you still had other things to explore. Hyunjin agreed as Jaehyun tied back on her shoes.

You ventured further into the park towards the food stands and hated how packed it was. You watched Jaehyun pick Hyunjin up as you moved passed the various bodies.

“Okay Hyunjin. What are you in the mood for?”

“Corndogs.” She answered after giving it some thought. You made a face and called her a weirdo for her choice, but looked around for any stands selling corndogs. You found one as Jaehyun’s phone started to ring. He took it out his pocket and groaned at the name displayed.

“It’s work. I’ll be a minute.” He said passing Hyunjin onto you. He wandered off to a less crowded spot not too far away. With Hyunjin in your hands you walked over to the stand.

Smiling at the vender you asked for two corndogs, one for Hyunjin and Jaehyun since you weren’t hungry yet. You placed Hyunjin down to take out your wallet. Rummaging through it you suddenly remembered that you left your card sitting on your nightstand. Sighing, you started to looked down to apologized and that she’ll have to wait for her father.

When she wasn’t there.

You whipped your head back to the vender. “Did you see where she went?”

He shook his head and went back to serving the next customer.

You turned around and she was nowhere in sight.

There was a brief pause in your breathing before panic started to set in.

“Hyunjin.” You called quietly at first, thinking you were overreacting; that she was standing somewhere near and you were overlooking her.

“Hyunjin.”

Nothing.

You yelled her name louder and was meant with the same silence. You felt your airway constrict and now you were in a full panic. You started screaming her name when you felt some one touch your shoulder.

The look Jaehyun gave you was that of confusion and concern.

“She was just- I put her down for a second- she was just here.” You said winded.

Jaehyun’s eyes widen as he pushed passed you calling his daughter’s name. You felt your heart rate rise and you knew you should be calling for her, but you couldn’t. Your mind traveled to the worst places; episodes of criminal minds invading your every thought.

“Jaehyun.” You said weakly. “Hyunjin-”

“You were supposed to watch her!” He snapped obviously panicking too.

You tried to bite back the tears that swelled.

Jaehyun paused, taken aback by his own outburst. He opened his mouth to say something, but stopped. He sighed before returning to calling for Hyunjin.

You allowed yourself a second to wipe your tears and gather yourself. You called out for Hyunjin as you ran past booths, stopping to ask random people if they’ve seen a lone child. None of them were any help since the place was filled with children running around.

You were four seconds away from calling the police when you spotted her walking away from a toy booth. Running and pushing people out the way you grabbed her, falling to your knees.

She looked confused at you as you feathered touches on her face.

“I want to see the elf plushies.” She informed, puzzled at why you looked so upset.

“You can’t.” You chocked on a sob. “You can’t just wander off like that.” You sobbed pulling her into a hug, sobbing in her chest.

“Oh thank god.” Jaehyun exclaimed running up. You pulled away from Hyunjin and she ran into her father’s arms, visibly upset. Jaehyun picked her up, hugging her tightly.

“Hyunjin you know better than to scare us like that.” He scolded. Tears started to fall down her cheeks as she apologized.

Standing up, you ran your fingers through your hair. Unconsciously you took a step back, distancing yourself as you watched Jaehyun cradle Hyunjin in his arms.

Sighing, Jaehyun looked at you. “Let’s go home.”

You bit down hard at your bottom lips, shaking your head. “No. You guys go. I’ll text you later.” You said quickly before turning to walk away.

Jaehyun started to say your name, but you were already disappearing into the crowd. When you were a safe distance you pulled out your phone to call Ten.

“Can you pick me up?”

When you arrived back at your apartment you said nothing, walking straight to your room, and crawled under the covers. You felt your phone vibrate on the pillow next to you, but made no attempt to get it. You laid staring at the wall as the orange light from the sun cascaded down the wall as the hours passed. It almost reached the ground when there was a knock on your door.

“Can I come in?” Ten asked faintly. You softly chuckled to yourself since Ten was the type to open the door regardless.

“I guess.” He opened the door and leaned on the frame, cooing pitifully at you. He pushed himself off and made his way over to the bed, asking you to scoot over so he had room to lay down. Reluctantly you do.

“Kun and I were sure we wouldn’t see you until after Christmas, so you can imagine my surprise when you called.” He tenderly tucked a stray strand behind your ear. “Talk when you’re ready.”

Your eyes traveled up to his and his usual mischievous gaze was replaced with one of soft understanding, something that was more common with Kun’s.

“I’m a terrible person.” You started.

“False, but continue.”

“I lost Hyunjin.” Ten’s eyes widen. “We found her, thank god.” You added.

“But I lost her and I don’t even know how to describe the feeling. I just panicked.” Tears started to swell once again. “I panicked and I hated it. When we found her my first thought was I can’t do this. She’s a small human being that I'm partly responsible for and I have trouble taking care of myself sometimes. Then I was mad at myself for even thinking that. She's his whole world and I just.” Ten wiped the tears that fell. “I didn’t even apologize. I just ran away like a coward.”

He gave you some time to calm down, continually wiping all of your tears, “Do you want my advice?” He asked genuinely.

“No, not really.” You answered honestly, leaning your head on his chest.

“Okay. I won’t advise you on anything, I’ll leave that to someone else. I will say this, you’re more capable than you give yourself credit for.” He placed a kiss on your forehead.

“Jaehyun is in the living room. He came to see if you were okay since you weren't answering your phone. You don’t have to see him if you don’t want too.”

You sat up and wiped your tear stained cheeks. “No, he can come in.” You tried to ignore the blinding smile that he gave you as he hurried out of the room.

Looking around, you shrugged off the chaotic mess that was your room.

“Hey.” Jaehyun’s voice brought your attention to the door. “Can I come in?”

You nodded and your breath hitched as he stepped closer. His disheveled appearance completely throwing you off guard, hair strewn in odd places, his eyes clearly red from crying, the tired husk of his voice. Guilt immediately started to eat at you.

Smiling weakly, he sat next to you.

The silence that surround you was something you’ve ever experience with Jaehyun before. Awkward. Unsure.

“Jaehyun.” You started quietly.

“Can I go first?” You nodded, unable to look at him. “Hyunjin is fine. Johnny’s at the house taking care of her. She’s a mess. She’s sorry she upset you and is afraid she scared you off forever.” There was pain in his voice.

“I'm sorry I yelled at you. I should have never done that. All you’ve done is help Hyunjin and I. She's at the age where she wanders and that’s not your fault. You didn’t sign up to be a full-time parent and I'm sorry if I’ve put unnecessary pressure or stress on you.”

You bit down on your lip to stop it from trembling so much. “No.” You wiped your tears for what seemed like the hundred time that day. You turned towards him, grabbing both his hands into yours. “Jae I’m so sorry for losing Hyunjin; I should have said that the moment we found her instead of running away. It wasn’t my proudest moment and it will never happen again. It’s not Hyunjin’s fault she’s a curious child; I’ll watch her more closely next time.

You gently touched his cheeks, beckoning him to look at you. “You’ve never pressured me into doing anything I didn’t want to do Jae. I’m not Hyunjin’s mother, but I love her so much and I would do anything for her. The thought of losing her and you is something that terrifies me so I’m sorry.”

The tears that ran down Jaehyun’s cheek surprised you, causing your tears to do the same. Leaning in he engulfed you in a tight embrace.

“I love you so much it hurts.” He whispered.

“I love you too.” You confessed a light laugh following. “So I'm forgiven?” You asked.

“As long as I am.” Grabbing his face, you place one long kiss on his lips before jumping off your bed.

“Come on, I have a child to apologize to.”

You saw two cars park outside when you arrived at Jaehyun’s place. You looked at him confused.

“He probably called reinforcements.” He shrugged.

Once inside you heard Hyunjin’s wails and saw a stressed out Johnny and Taeyong catering to her. Johnny was the first to see you and let out a sigh of relief.

“I’ve never been so happy to see you shorty.” He exclaimed, head hitting the back of the cushion.

“Oh thank god.” Taeyong did the same.

Hyunjin stayed in her spot on Johnny’s lap, glancing up at you with quivering lips.

“Angel.” You said softly. The moment the word left your lips Hyunjin full sprinted into your arms. You lifted her up as she sobbed into your chest. You kissed the crown of her head shushing her as you rocked back and forth.

“I'm so sorry Hyunjin.” She shook her head, arms reaching to wrap around your neck.

“I'm sorry. Please don’t leave.” She cried.

You gently pulled her away from your neck so you could look at her.

“I love you too much to ever leave you.” You smiled leaning in to kiss her forehead. It hit you that it was the first time you told her you love her.

Turning to Jaehyun, the smile on his face was something that made your heart flip. From the corner of your eye you could see Johnny and Taeyong high five before getting off the couch.

Not long after Hyunjin drifted off in your arms, completely exhausted.

“Welp that was enough excitement for one day.” Johnny announced, quietly walking towards the door. He ruffled your head was he passed. “See you later.”

“Bye kiddo.” Taeyong lightly pinched your cheek.

Jaehyun followed them out thanking them before locking the door.

“I’ll go put her to bed.” You informed when he returned.

He nodded. “I’ll get a movie ready?”

You smiled as you turned to walk away. “Horror please.”

You smiled more when you heard him laugh.

[fanficparker]

Faking, Falling > Part 13

Harrison Osterfield x Reader (Fake dating! Unrequited love switcheroo!)

Word count: ~2.7 k words

Warning: Swearing(a lot lol), Major Fluff and Angst, mentions of anxiety attack.

A/N: I have written this chapter 7 times(no jokes), yet it doesn’t appeal to me. Hope our opinions differ :|

Summary: Everything not saved will be lost...

<< PART 12  [ MASTERLIST ] PART 14 >>

Insisting your mum to sit and wait on the dining table while Harrison and you were cooking dinner was indeed one good decision. It was a real fun time to look at the boy who had just minutes ago proudly claimed to be a wonderful chef, struggling to chop carrots. He was repeatedly shifting and bouncing on his feet, changing the angle of the knife with the chopping board, placing the carrots back and forth, yet needing too much force to cut them.

You had already finished preparing the gravy and was waiting for the vegetables to be put into it, but Harrison... You turned off the flame and stood next to him, sneaking a peek at his MasterChef skills. He stopped for a second, looked up at you, saw you grinning, made a face and started... more like 'struggled' to continue chopping. A small chuckle left your lips imagining yourself as Gordon Ramsey and calling him something like 'you donkey.' Harrison ignored your chuckle but soon you erupted into a hysterical laughter. He glanced at you from the corner of his eyes and dropped his knife on the board. He turned to face you.

"What?" He said folding his arms to his chest and rolling his eyes. He wasn't expecting the next thing to happen. You stood up on your tip-toes and softly pecked his cheek. It was out of his expectations and now he was out of breath. He looked at you, you were giggling, eyes crinkling.

"You are so adorable, Harrison."

Those maybe just a few words for you but for him, it meant nothing less than a ray of hope. He didn't care if you could see him blushing, he didn't care if you could see him staring at you. He just stood there in his natural form, completely displaying everything he felt for you in his eyes.

See it Y/n. See it for yourself because I don't know how to say it. His chest constricted when you turned to the chopping board and started cutting the left carrots. He closed his eyes, heaved a slight sigh and ducked his head down. A small smile spread across his lips.

Hope.

His teeth nipped at his lower lip trying to contain the smile. He shook his head slowly and made his way to the stove. He switched on the flame and started stirring the gravy while you put in the chopped vegetables inside the pan, smiling back at him.

Things weren't any different on the dining table. Harrison found himself unable to concentrate on his food. He couldn't involve himself in the conversations. He felt your hand rest on his knee from beneath the table, his head shot up and swirled to look at you. For once he just wanted to stare at those e/c eyes.

"Didn't like the food?" You quipped. He shook his head and smiled.

"... I-I love it."

Your hand reached out to hold his free hand but before you could barely make any contact, his arm hurriedly rushed to wipe off the sweat that covered his clammy palms but you held it before he could do so and interlaced your fingers with his.

***

Days were passing by…

Harrison was lying on the bed, staring at the ceiling, his hands were folded at the back of his head. He was biting at his lower lip as a message flooded across his mind.

Warning: Are you sure you want to quit? Everything not saved will be lost. His mind couldn't get rid of the normal video game exit message all of a sudden. It had just simply stuck on his mind.

"Are you sure you want to quit?" He mouthed the sentence, trying to feel how it sounded like in his voice and felt like on his lips. He sighed feeling stupid. He should be sleeping. He couldn't anyway sleep on time, it took a lot of time and efforts for him to finally drift to sleep. Sometimes it took him two hours after lying down on the bed and sometimes even more than four hours. Tonight, was the latter. His insomnia only led him to wake up extremely late in the morning and even sometimes he ended up waking up in the afternoon. It was a compulsion to wake up early when he had work but in these free times, he simply couldn't. In all these eleven days he never woke up early.

Eleven days... Eleven days have passed.

Wait. No. It was the twelfth day already.

Harrison's stomach churned painfully, his breathing started to get heavier. He turned his head to look at you. One of your arms was resting over his torso and your head was pressed against his shoulder. You looked so peaceful. And it somehow managed to hurt his feelings.

How can you be so peaceful?

HOW CAN YOU BE SO PEACEFUL?!!

He turned his head again towards the ceiling, closing his eyes momentarily, trying to clear his mind. But... Don't you know it's the twelfth day? Twelve out of thirteen days of the agreement! His eyeballs roamed violently and anxiously hidden under the cover of his eyelids. He could hear the sound of the ticking wall clock. He dreaded of being unable to stop it, reverse it or at least slow it down.

Did he even spend any time with you? Seriously, what did you two even do in all these days? He tried to think. He forced himself to think, to remember, yet all he found was his brain in a frozen state, his mind was stuck over the constant fact— it's over.

Everything not saved will be lost.

His palms were all pins and needles, he clenched them into a tight fist but the sensation didn't leave him. His throat was dry and suddenly it was too difficult to breathe or maybe even impossible. His chest felt like constricting. A single tear left his eyes and trickled down to fall into his ears. It was happening again, after so many days. Just in two days, he will be back to being alone— lonely. He hated being lonely.

He tried to calm himself down. Failing to do so forced him to remove your arm that rested on him. He counted under his breath, inhaling and exhaling with each even and odd numeral as he got up from the bed and walked inside the bathroom. He stared at his reflection in the mirror while his palms were pressed against the counter. He sucked in a breath and splashed water across his face, almost violently yet it helped, he soon felt better.

On getting outside the bathroom he noticed you sitting on the bed, while the table lamp was switched on. Lifting your head, you glanced at him as he walked back to the bed giving him a sleepy smile. And he did smile back. How couldn't he? There was something in the way you smiled that reminded him of his better self, something you brought in him. He sat beside you and as if everything wasn't enough, you slid closer to him (basically bumping into him), closed your eyes, snaked an arm around his waist and rested your head on his shoulder while slowly caressing his arm with your fingers. His eyelids fluttered shut, allowing himself to get lost in the feeling.

"I'll miss you..." You whispered in a sleepy, groggy voice, trailing off the words. A stupid chuckle left his lips, his heart momentarily lurched, calming the damage it suffered moments ago.

"What?" You quipped, lifting up your head to look at his face. Opening his eyes, he bent his head down so that it rested over your head, inhaling the sweet smell of the almost faded shampoo. He planted a little kiss in your hair, a sweet loving one, the one that made your heart flutter and skin burn.

"You don't have to miss me."

You pulled your head away and looked at him, curiously.

"How?"

He turned to face you and folded his legs beneath him. He inhaled sharply and looked down at your hands. His arms reached out and held them both in his bigger ones. He breathed out slowly, looking back into your eyes. You shifted closer to him, knees bumping, waiting for him to speak.

"It's—It's... I don't want this to end." His voice almost cracked saying it. He gulped and chose to continue speaking, ignoring the dryness in his throat.

"I... I... I really like you Y/n." He uttered in a single breath making your breath hitch in your throat. You would be lying if you didn't consider it coming. He had given signals, enough signals, but you chose to pretend not to notice. Your fingers curled and you gently slide away your hands from his grip, turning away so that he couldn't see your face. The sudden surge of wetness in your eyelashes forced you to look up at the ceiling. Harrison didn't speak anything, he just sat there waiting for you to respond something, literally anything but your tongue was tied into a thousand knots. You picked at the cuticles of your fingernails, not knowing what to feel about any of this. Inhaling deeply and wiping off the little tears you turned back to see him. He was looking down at his hands, badly fidgeting.

"Sorry..." Your voice came as a whisper and his head shot up.

"... Sorry?" He repeated in disbelief.

"I... I don't know." Your chest felt like swelling making it difficult to breathe. He grabbed your hands again, tracing circles on the back with his thumb.

"It's okay. I understand." His smile seemed forced and pained.

'"I am not saying no. I just... How do I explain?" You had started getting frustrated. You wanted to scratch your head but he had held your arms and was lovingly drawing patterns over them. He was still facing you, patiently waiting for you to explain but that was the exact problem.

How to fucking explain this weird turmoil in your heart?

"You don't trust me, right?" His voice came.

Shit. Right. He was right. Y/n didn't know how to move on. Stupid Y/n. You mentally scolded yourself.

"... I don't trust me neither." His hands left yours and dropped onto his thighs like they had zero strength. Your heartfelt heavy at his words. Why would he say that?

"Why? Why are you saying---"

He cuts you off and his voice came a little louder, "Forget what I said. Christ! What was I even thinking?! Me..." He let out a dry, broken laugh that just made your stomach fall. He shifted back and raked his hands through his hairs, his hands were shaking.

"I am an absolute piece of shit. You remember how I humiliated you in front of a big crowd? And still, you're here being nice to me and I was falling for you and expected you to feel the same for me. Ha." He slapped the side of his head and tears were slipping down his cheeks. For a minute your body froze, unable to respond, taking in his appearance.

"You know, you are not the only one I fucked up with. I fuck up with everyone. All my friends hate me. My family, damn... How are they even keeping up with me?" He hurriedly jumped off the bed and started walking around the room. You tried to get up and approach him but he showed his palm at you when you tried to get out of the bed. You stopped and his hands again made their way to his hairs and he was almost pulling at his curls.

"You know... I had this great big friend circle. We all were like buddies but then... But then... I fell in love with Shelly and fucked up everything."

You sat there and listened, that was the maximum you could do right now.

"I was just thirteen and I was in love with my best friend. And damn I thought she loved me back. She used to spend so much time with me, hold my hand, held me when dad died. I was sixteen and decided to tell her but then... I saw her kissing Tom. Tom oh... My other best friend, the brother I never had and they were kissing. I let it happen... Obviously. They seemed happy together and I was happy for them.

"But then Tom had to go to the States for months and she came to me. She said she realised she loved me. I told her to tell him but she said she already did. I shouldn't have believed her, I should have checked for myself but I was too desperate. Fucking too desperate! She cheated on Tom with me... Me— her best friend and Tom's best friend. And when he came back, everyone blamed me more than her. They all left me. Shelly got away to Ireland and everyone... each one of them ghosted me even when we lived in the same town, studied in the same school. I failed my semester that year. Tom, Harry, Tuwaine all of them just ghosted me, pretended like I didn't exist. And you know what I did?" He stopped on his tracks and looked at you, you were just sitting there like a statue unable to understand how to respond to anything he said. You tried to open your mouth but words didn't form. He snorted and looked to the other side, deciding to continue.

"Then I became an absolute asshole, having no remorse for anything. I stopped caring if my actions broke the heart of the other person. And then there was you... You who seemed like the old me, too naïve to believe me just like I believed Shelly but... I was wrong. You were better. A better person and yet I ended up hurting you at multiple occasions, not even realizing that I was hurting myself in the process. But... I deserve it and you don't." He paused, exhaling sharply. "I just wanna say that... I am really sorry Y/n." He looked down at his feet, standing in the middle of the room. There was complete silence in the room for what seemed like hours.

"...Not like I am any better." Your voice came out quieter but clearly audible. Harrison looked at you as you got up from the bed and walked towards him. You wrapped your arms around his torso and leaned in to place your head on his chest. He didn't respond, just stood there while you hugged him tightly.

"You know if Simon didn't turn out to be a bad guy, I was basically just using him to oppose you. And then I dragged you into this act without your consent for my personal gains." You confessed, hearing his heartbeat through his chest. His hands twitched and he slowly placed an arm around your back.

"We have our own demons, Haz. But I am glad we realised and aren't making an excuse out of it. We learnt and grew out of it."

He sighed, running his fingers through your hairs and resting his face on the top of your head.

"I feel better letting everything out. It was easier than I thought. Thanks for listening."

"... And thanks for everything," You mouthed, snuggling into his chest but he pulled himself back, holding your shoulders and looking at you for answers.

"Everything?"

"I mean... You supported me in all my career insecurity and so much more. I had my best fortnight ever with you." A blush crept up your cheeks but you were genuinely grateful.

"That's nothing," He shrugged.

"Meant a lot to me," a half-grin plastered across your face and he did smile back. Like he always does. He realised that he was staring at your face and that made him bounce back on his feet, pulling away from your embrace. He once again looked down at his feet and scratched the back of his neck.

"So... what now?" He bit the inside of his cheeks, looking at you through his lashes.

"Maybe just sleep for now."

Like he'll be able to sleep when you had a big ass question unanswered.

"Sure."

________________________________

TAGLIST:  @asmilinghopefullromantic​ // @just-a-littlebit-of-everything​ // @xximaweirdoxx​ // @jjasalem​ // @spidergirl007​ // @wizliar​ // @justasmisunderstoodasloki​ // @veronicas-littleworld​ // @acceptance07​ // @ghostspf​ // @screeching-student-unknown​ // @fanficscuziranout​ // @miraclesoflove​ // @trustfundparker​ // @tikapollak​ // @yourmum792​ // @skymoonandstardust​ // @nxdxh // @httplayer​ // @peterparkerbabyyy //  @lizzyosterfield​ // @tomhaz​ // @softholand​ // @girl1sstuff​ // @thenoddingbunny-blog​

[thewolfisapartofmysoul]

Hey lovelies,

Got a Dewey Finn x reader for you.

Reader is depressed and Dewey is there to take care of her.

Trigger! Depression! Also: angst and fluff.

Hope you enjoy.

Light in your dark.

You felt dark. You felt sad. Beyond sad. It was just as if all the happiness was recently sucked out of you. Nothing remaining of the bright light that normally surrounded your bubbly personality.

You couldnt eat. You couldnt sleep. You couldnt even convince yourself to take a shower. You just lay in the comfort of your couch for... hours? Days? Weeks? You weren't sure how long exactly.

Your phone buzzed in the background. Again. You heared the familiar tune of ACDC's 'highway to hell' rang in the distance. It was the ringtone to match Deweys number, but you couldn't bring yourself to care.

You sighed again, deeply... just wanting to forget. And to be forgotten. With the ringtone lulling you to sleep, you closed your eyes. Embracing the darkness completely.

You woke up by the sound of a familiar voice calling your name. You slowly opened your eyes, annoyed by the light that creeped not only into your eyes but also tried to intrude into your soul. You were fine with the darkness your soul reveled in right now...

Well... apparently the person calling your name wasn't cool with this whole deal with the darkness you had going on. You didnt even want to open your eyes to see who that voice belonged to, that was untill a feeling peaked your interest. The familiar feeling of stubble against your neck, combined with a smell you'd grown to love. A little bit of sweat, green tea and something unmistakably Dewey filled your nostrils. You cracked one eye open at the sound of his deep voice. The voice you had learn to trust. The voice that you had learn to love. "Hey... hey sweetheart... You gotta get up and drink something."

Your brows furrowed, and you closed your eyes again, grumbling at Dewey. "Just go Dew... go and take that bright light of life with you..." your voice cracked when you continued: "its too much... i cant take it right now Dewey. Just go. Please...." Tears tickled down your face when you struggled to get the words out through your sobs. Your last word wasn't more then a whisper.

Dewey sighed deeply, his huf growled deep in his throath, you could feel it against your neck when he exhaled. You felt his calloused thumb gently brush away the tears that were on your cheeks. You sniffled at that, feeling even more of a failure. You never felt this small and helpless in your life.

Dewey sat beside the couch and you were laying with your back to him. He had his head on your shoulder and kneeled next to the couch behind you.

He hated to see you like this, shutting out everyting. The world just suddenly too much for you to handle. He wanted to be there for you. Show you what you ment to him. Help you find the light in the darkness.

"Sweetheart. Im not leaving. Im never leaving. You got this. We got this. Im here. Its okay..."

You felt Dewey sneak his left hand under your waist so he could stroke your belly. His fingers brushed against your belly-button and his stubble still on your shoulder, kissing your cheek lovingly. Dewey murmered: "Hey love... open your eyes for me, please? Please?"

You opened your eyes when he started to tickle your belly-button. Smiling a bit when he did so.

"Thats it... keep those pretty eyes open for me, angel." He whispered lovingly in your ear, still softly stroking your belly.

Dewey placed his other hand on your knee, he started to humm into your ear as he let his fingers move on your leg. You smiled a bit through your sniffles when you recognized the tapping on your knee. Dewey was playing chords on your knee. Placing his calloused fingers where they should be on the strings to make a chord.

You giggled when you felt Dewey move his hand faster over your belly button, now full on tickeling your stomach. His other hand was rhythmically switching chords on your leg, and you felt the vibration of his voice hum at your neck and shoulder. His scruff tickeling when he enthausiastically made sound effects on his imaginary guitar.

... well... on you.

You had to laugh at his antics... he was just such a dork. You laughed untill you had no breath to laugh with anymore.

Dewey had turned the air-guitar play into a full tickle-fight. You squirmed and cackled as his skilled fingers tickled every inch of your skin.

You screamed in joy and was breathless because there had been so much laughing.

The wrestle left you laying on your back, with Dewey hovering above you.

His brown locks standing wildly on top of his head, when he locked eyes with you he leaned in to kiss you softly. He smirked, brushed your cheek and cooed: "Hey sweetheart. My name is Mister Finn... and im here to bring you the light."

You rolled your eyes and smiled up at his happy face. Starting to apologize: "Dew... listen... im sorry that i sometimes feel overwh-"

You were stopped mid sentence because Dewey pressed his lips on yours, sweetly kissing your doubts and apologies away.

"Hey... Sweetheart... listen to me. There is NO need to apologize. Its okay. I get it. The world is a bit much sometimes. Just... trust that i will always be here to bring the light, when you are drowning in the dark. Okay?

I am here. I always will be here. Promise."

He leaned down to kiss you once again and softly brushed away the tears that were on your face. Again. Luckely this time it were happy tears. You smiled through your sobs when you kissed him.

Dewey murmered against your lips: "You are one hell of an air guitar, dear.... I gotta remember that. Can come in handy someday."

He pecked away every tear that was still on your face, while you snorted at his comment.

Deweys rough stubble brushed against your forehead when he kissed it and he took your hand in his. He brought them to his lips and kissed the back of your hand and he winked at you.

The happiness beamed through his brown eyes as he spoke: "Now mylady... get your fancy ass of the couch..." Dewey started to pull you up from the couch, wrapping his arms protectively around you. Wrapping you in a safe supporting embrace as he continued to speak: "...and do me the honours of drinking a cup of tea with me? You gotta drink something, love."

You tried to nod your head yes, but his embrace left no room for it, so you just breathed a yes in his ear.

Dewey pulled away, kissed your nose and beamed you a half smile: "Good. We are gonna attack the bathtub after our tea. Okay? Im gonna stay with you, dear. No more darkness... deal?"

You nodded your head yes and was pulled into Deweys embrace immediately after. You snickered at his reply. "Good thing, love... Cant play my favorite air guitar in the dark now... can I?"

You squeeled when you felt his fingers tickle your skin again, laughing at the sound Dewey made when he did so. Tickeling you he yelled: " The crowd goes wiiiiiiild!" Fingers tickeling your skin, all you could do was laugh and cackle. His impression of a electric guitar wasnt that bad, you noticed between laughs. Through your laughs and his enthausiastic sound-effects you heared him cheer: "Oh dear!!! Im ShrEdDINg thOsE CHoRdSsSSSsss!!! Whoowh!!!"

After minutes of him holding you tight when he tickled you, you both were exhausted. You tiredly leaned against his chest and he did one last final chord, emphasizing it with a sound effect as he spoke: "I wanna thank the crowd tonight. But especially my favorite air guitar. Whitout her I wouldn't be whole."

He kissed you softly, running a hand trough your hair and spoke: "Come on babe. Even the most bright air-guitar needs a cup of tea to keep jamming..."

He whispered to you between kisses: "Im here. And im gonna stay."

@ironmansuucks... thanx for the picture, love. 😍

@ironmansuucks @paxenera @heknowshisherbs @hoodoo12 @large-unit @little-miss-shy-goth @thats-specific @vicunaburger @go-commander-kim @stranger-strings @bugdrinkss

[fromkaermorhentolettenhove]

Salvation - Chapter 2

Previous - Next

Chapter Summary: As the days pass, Geralt begins to learn more about Jaskier

Words: 3216

Additional Tags: Coping With PTSD, Panic Attacks, Emotional Support Horse Roach

-

AO3

or

“What’s her name?”

Geralt’s thoughts were broken and he looked up at Jaskier perched on Roach. It was mid-morning, the two having set off the moment the sun rose. Geralt didn’t want to tire Roach out and decided letting Jaskier ride her alone was the best option. 

“Roach,” Geralt answered, giving her a pat on the neck. 

“Roach?” Jaskier frowned. “That’s…”

Geralt gave him a warning glance and Jaskier stumbled over his words. “That’s a fine name for a horse. Really. I mean it.”

Certainly not the words Geralt was expecting. He gave Jaskier a raised eyebrow to which the man chuckled at. 

“I promise I’m a much better poet than that. Just get me a lute and I’m right as rain.”

Tucking that away in his mind, Geralt looked back at the road, judging the sun’s position and the narrow path that weaved between the hills. There were surely to be some more rural towns, but how plentiful they were or what need of a witcher they had was yet to be determined. 

“Did you know…”

The next sentences to come out of Jaskier’s mouth were small talk and Geralt tried to filter it through every other noise the landscape was giving him. He responded when Jaskier expected and took in the subtle details that Jaskier didn’t even realize he was sharing. 

There was an enduring strength to him, a young man who had seen some of life’s horrors, yet still able to smile another day. Geralt wondered where that part of himself had gone, if it was ever there in the first place. 

“Do you enjoy it, being a witcher?” 

Geralt furrowed his brows before looking up at Jaskier. He hadn’t thought about that for many years now.

“It gets me coin. I didn’t have a choice in becoming one.”

Jaskier hummed solemnly before jumping into another question. “If you weren’t a witcher, what do you think you’d like to do?”

Geralt sighed. Personal questions had always been uncomfortable but there was a part of him that felt he wouldn’t get away with grunts and shrugs when it came to Jaskier. 

“I suppose living in the country with Roach would be nice.”

“Mm, it’d be quite a difference from what you’re doing now. Suppose you could always do that when you get too old for this sort of thing.”

What Jaskier meant by ‘old’, Geralt didn’t even want to think about. He expected plenty more years ahead as long as some monster didn’t get him first. Realizing he should return the question, Geralt opened his mouth, but Jaskier had already switched topics. He had a restless mind that left Geralt struggling to keep up. 

Then again, Jaskier hadn’t had this freedom in a while. While Geralt himself was a quiet soul, it seemed Jaskier needed others and Geralt supposed he would have to get used to that. How strange it was that he was allowing Jaskier to bring all these changes into this life and with little protest. Geralt wondered if his years of solitude were finally eating away at him.

As they settled down for the evening, Geralt made sure Jaskier kept putting salve on his wounds and looked away when Jaskier had taken off his shirt. Just thinking about what had happened to Jaskier made Geralt’s blood boil, there was no telling what he’d do if he saw those marks again. Jaskier appreciated the privacy, letting Geralt know when he was finished and giving him back the salve.

Their dinner was eaten in relative silence, the two men regarding each other over the small fire. Jaskier made a few quips here and there, but his exhaustion was taking over, leaving Geralt to busy himself with his whittling. 

“Could you teach me?” 

Geralt looked up from his work, almost asking if Jaskier was talking to him. Jaskier had ducked his head, his eyes anywhere but on Geralt. Geralt inhaled, not sure if he was up for teaching or if he could explain his knife skills at all. It had been a small hobby he had picked up over the years, never putting much thought into it. 

“If you want,” Jaskier mumbled. “You don’t have to, certainly. Your business is your own–”

Panic set in on Geralt’s mind and he blurted out the first thing that came to his mind. “Let me check if I have a spare knife,”

Heading over to the bags, Geralt mentally kicked himself. Why Jaskier was sending Geralt spinning was beyond him. All he knew is he didn’t like seeing Jaskier upset. With a sigh, he dug through various pockets to see what he could find. He always had some spare weapon, but he didn’t want to give Jaskier a monstrous dagger just for woodcarving. At the bottom of one of the bags, there was a small knife–from where, Geralt couldn’t remember for the life of him–and he handed it to Jaskier as he sat next to him. 

“Keep it,” Geralt said as he grabbed a hefty piece of wood from the pile of kindling. “You can use it to protect yourself as well.”

Jaskier laughed a little at this, thanking Geralt as the lesson began. Geralt hadn’t gotten far on his project and he figured he could start on something easier for Jaskier’s sake. 

“Any animals you like?” Geralt asked, studying the wood’s bumps and cracks. 

“Oh, any at all,” Jaskier mused. “You choose.”

Geralt didn’t like being put on the spot like that and started with a small cut. He’d figure it out as they went along. Jaskier mimicked what he did with Geralt reaching over to adjust his finger positions. Once satisfied, Geralt began again, watching Jaskier out of the corner of his eyes. Not to his surprise, Jaskier picked it up quickly. He had mentioned something about a lute leading Geralt to guess Jaskier was skilled when it came to handiwork. 

Before long, Geralt pulled back to look at what he had carved to see the outline of a wolf’s face staring back at him. He raised his eyebrows, a bit exasperated with his one-track mind, but Jaskier seemed pleased. His cuts were more rugged, some too shallow, others deep enough to go right through the other side, yet considering it was his first time, Geralt could see a wolf in Jaskier’s block of wood as well. 

Jaskier was smiling as he admired his work, an innocence that Geralt couldn’t stop watching. If little things were all it took to make the man happy, then Geralt could easily accommodate that. 

Geralt sighed a little. How quick he was to do anything for Jaskier. They had only known each other for just over a few days and even then, it was hardly knowing. What was it that made Jaskier different from others? Geralt did not know. All he could see whenever he looked at Jaskier was hope. There was a different path of life in him and perhaps it was calling to Geralt. He had been hunting for years, maybe he needed something else to add to that usual task. 

“What are you looking at?” Jaskier interrupted Geralt’s thoughts, tilting his head. 

There was a small smile on his face and Geralt looked away, turning his attention back to his carving. He hadn’t realized he had been staring. 

Jaskier didn’t seem bothered in the slightest by Geralt’s reaction, mimicking his movements. They carved together in silence and Geralt wasn’t sure how much time had passed before Jaskier stifled a yawn. 

“I’ll keep watch,” Geralt said, getting to his feet. 

“We’ll take turns then?” Jaskier followed. 

Handing Jaskier a bed roll, Geralt shook his head. “I’ll be fine. The slightest noise will wake me even if I fall asleep.”

Jaskier’s eyebrows furrowed, but he didn’t reply as he unfurled the bed roll by the fire. 

“If you need anything, just let me know,” Jaskier murmured as he laid down. 

Geralt bit back his smile. That was supposed to be his line. However, he didn’t have a chance to reply as Jaskier already began drifting off, small breaths leaving him. 

Something swelled in Geralt’s heart and he didn’t want to look away. The sounds of the night were but far-away distractions compared to this man illuminated by the fire. 

Finding another piece of wood, Geralt began carving again and before he knew it, features of Jaskier were staring up at him, sealing Geralt’s fate.

~

The morning was like any other, no immediate signs of danger, a pleasant breeze passing through. 

Jaskier’s chatter was growing by the hour and he was now insisting he and Geralt take turns riding Roach. 

“I can walk just fine, see?” Jaskier held out his arms before he proceeded to trip over a rock. 

“Yes, clearly,” Geralt replied, having grabbed Jaskier by the collar before he could fall face-first into the dirt. 

Jaskier scowled and continued to march on, but after a while, he couldn’t hide when his body was tiring. 

“No, no, Geralt, I’m okay,” Jaskier insisted as Geralt hopped off Roach. 

“Then we’ll both walk,” Geralt shrugged. 

Roach whinnied at this and Geralt gave her a pat. She deserved the rest at any rate. 

Jaskier was soon talking again, somehow finding more and more things to say amongst Geralt’s small replies. While Geralt liked silence, having other ways to distract his mind was nice. It was good to see that Jaskier was becoming more confident as well. 

Soon enough a village was in sight and Geralt steeled himself, hoping he would be welcome. When Jaskier suddenly went quiet, Geralt frowned and noticed the wide-eyed stare on his face. 

“Are you alright?” Geralt asked. 

He took a step closer to Jaskier, freezing when Jaskier scrambled back. Jaskier’s breathing was rapid and shallow, his eyes unfocused and towards the ground. 

“I just...need a moment,” Jaskier managed, slowly crumpling to the ground. 

Geralt stayed where he was, not wanting to frighten Jaskier any more than he already did. At least, he wanted to say it was fear. The scents radiating off of him were chaotic, conflicting, and Geralt wasn’t sure what to think. He hadn’t noticed Roach move from his side, but before he could stop her, she had leaned down, pressing her nose against Jaskier’s head. 

Jaskier reached up to pet her, his breathing still shallow, but beginning to even out. She nuzzled at him and to Geralt’s surprise, Jaskier let out a small laugh. Shakily, he got to his feet and he hugged Roach around her neck, his face buried in her mane. When Jaskier pulled away at last, he turned to Geralt, an apologetic look on his face. 

“I’m not afraid of you, I promise,” Jaskier reassured. 

Geralt wasn’t so sure, but he wasn’t about to argue. Taking Geralt by the wrist, Jaskier urged him into walking again and Roach followed the two. Jaskier was almost recovered, but when they reached the outskirts of the village, Geralt could feel Jaskier tense up again.

When they entered, Jaskier immediately pressed into Geralt’s side, ducked his head down in an attempt to make himself smaller. Geralt could sense his confusion, watched as he flinched away from anyone that came too close. Wrapping an arm around Jaskier’s shoulders, Geralt helped him through the busy streets, feeling Jaskier relax, but only a little. 

It wasn’t until they were in the safety of their room at the inn that Jaskier began to breathe again. He sat down on the bed, burying his face in his hands before letting out a strangled laugh. 

“I’m sorry. It’s pathetic.”

Geralt could see his lip wobbling and he tried to think of some comforting words. “It’s not. You were hurt.”

Jaskier sighed, his arms wrapped around himself like a protective barrier. “I don’t want to be like this forever.”

“When…when my friend died, I refused to move on at first,” Geralt swallowed. Old wounds were opening and he wasn’t sure how much longer he could keep his composure. “There was nothing that could replace him.”

Jaskier said nothing, but Geralt could feel his eyes on him. 

“The pain never goes away, but the nightmares don’t come as often.”

Hearing his own words did little to comfort even Geralt himself and he hoped he wasn’t sending Jaskier into a deeper spiral. 

“Thank you...for sharing that with me,” Jaskier spoke at last. “Life is cruel, isn’t it?”

Geralt could only nod, glancing at Jaskier as the man laid back on the bed. 

“I think I would like to rest. You don’t have to stay on my account.”

“I’ll find us some food then,” Geralt answered in a soft voice.

Waiting until Jaskier closed his eyes, Geralt stepped out of the room, shutting it gently behind him. He needed the distraction. If he stayed in that room, tears were likely to happen and Geralt didn’t want Jaskier to have to see that. 

Heading down the streets of the market, Geralt scouted for needed supplies, most prices agreeable as sellers were often too afraid to haggle with Geralt. At one fabric stall, Geralt came across matching sets of clothing in a variety of colors, so he snagged some for Jaskier. His own shirts were too baggy for the man, plus Geralt didn’t want them dependent on just his clothes alone. Geralt was beginning to feel like a fool with his arms full of packages, but his shopping wasn’t done yet. Towards the last stalls, Geralt spotted the artistic woodworking and he stopped in front of a tent that was filled with all kinds of musical instruments. 

While Geralt knew more about weapons, he could tell the mark of a craftsman and looked around for a lute. There, hanging towards the higher part of a tent, was crimson wood, delicate floral designs etched into it. The lute had been made with intention, as if to say no man could take it off the seller’s hands. Luckily, Geralt was no man.

“You’ve got a good eye,” the old man nodded, following Geralt’s gaze. “Didn’t know witchers cared to play.”

Geralt did his best to keep his face stern, posture intimidating. “Consider yourself known then. How much?”

The seller grinned, offering an amount that seemed reasonable enough to Geralt and he agreed. Leaving the market with hands full, Geralt kept the lute and its case closest to himself and went back to the inn, hoping Jaskier was still asleep. To his luck, Jaskier had burrowed into the blankets, just the top of his head sticking out, allowing Geralt to tuck the case behind his other bags. 

He set out the meager meal he had acquired for them, chewing on a small piece of bread as he looked out the window. He was growing soft. No one had gained this kind of favor from Geralt in years and here Jaskier was flipping him on his head. 

Geralt had to admit there were many times on the road where he did get lonely. The only way he got past it was scolding himself. Witchers didn’t need anyone, didn’t need attachments that could hurt them in the end. 

Now, Geralt was doubting that, as he watched Jaskier stir under the blankets. There was a small yawn before Jaskier stretched and when he sat up, he appeared dazed. 

“How long have I been asleep?” Jaskier rubbed his eyes, tiredness hanging on the edge of his words. 

“Just a few hours,” Geralt guessed. “There’s food and drink.”

This got Jaskier’s attention and he rushed over to the table, scarfing down the food as if it was filled with delicacies. Geralt was sure he had never seen anyone eat so fast–when it came to humans–a part of him wondering if he should stop Jaskier in case he accidentally started choking. 

However, Jaskier was soon satisfied and sitting back on the bed, looking around the room. 

“I know it’s not much,” Geralt began but Jaskier was quick to reassure him. 

“It’s lovely. You could’ve put us in the stall with Roach and I’d find it filled with the comforts of home.”

Geralt’s mouth quirked up at this and he watched Jaskier just a little longer before he remembered what he had gotten at the market. As he pulled out the various packages, he could feel Jaskier’s stare on his back and imagined what curiosity those blue eyes held.

“I wanted to give this to you when you were awake,” Geralt said, handing the lute and its case to Jaskier first.

Jaskier tentatively took the case and opened it, a small gasp leaving him as he set the lute on his lap.

“Geralt, thank you,” he breathed, his hands tracing along the grain. “I don’t even know what to say, this is so kind of you.”

Geralt ducked his head, unused to such genuine gratitude. “Play me a few songs on the road and we’ll call it even.”

Mentally kicking himself, Geralt quickly turned away from Jaskier to hide his embarrassment and grabbed the other packages. Where that had come from, he had no idea. It came bursting from his heart and the sudden vulnerability was too much. 

“Alright,” Jaskier said, his voice carrying the hint of a smile. “I’ll write you a ballad as well.”

Geralt nearly dropped everything in his hands, but managed to set the packages next to Jaskier. “I got you some clothes as well,” Geralt ignored what Jaskier had said. 

It wasn’t so much ignore as it was not wanting to think too much about it. His words were sweet and promising, things Geralt hadn’t needed to respond to in the past. 

Jaskier had moved on, opening each package with earnest. He gushed over the fabrics, traced his hands over the designs as he told Geralt he would try them all on once he had a proper bath. Glancing back at the bed, Jaskier’s face turned red and he scratched the back of his neck. 

“Suppose we’ll need new sheets too. Didn’t realize what a mess I was.”

Geralt was glad to have an excuse to leave the room and he went quickly downstairs to secure everything for Jaskier. He didn’t want to go back up, but the innkeeper was getting busy with the customers trickling for the evening, giving Geralt no choice but to face Jaskier again.

Jaskier graciously helped him make the bed and offered the bath to Geralt first, an expectant stare trapping Geralt. Heat rose to Geralt’s face before he made a quick lie to leave once again, thankful Jaskier let him escape without any protest. The evening wore on and when Geralt figured he had stayed away long enough, he finally made his way upstairs. 

A few candles were still lit when Geralt entered the room, but Jaskier was sound asleep, soft snores leaving him. Geralt smiled to himself as he blew out the candles and settled on the small couch in the corner, his gaze never straying far from Jaskier. Even in the darkness, he could still see Jaskier’s outline and Geralt began to relax. Jaskier could sleep without worry, safe in this room, safe with Geralt. Strange as it was, Geralt found himself wanting to keep it this way for Jaskier no matter how long that may be.

Geralt was happy and for the first time in a while, sleep came easily. 

[smolstrawberrychara]

October Klance Prompts - 13/10 - Scary Movie

Never underestimate my power to turn an ordinary prompt into fluff

Scary Movie - horror actor Lance rushes home when his baby girl is ill ♥️

“Cut!”

Lance did not miss the way his co-star groaned at the call, rolling her eyes as she slumped off to get some water. Nyma always was a bit of a diva. But this time Lance agreed, throwing his head to the ceiling and stamping his foot. 

“Lance!” The director jogged over form his chair as tech milled around trying to re-put together the set. “What’s going on?”

“Argh Coran, I’m sorry, let’s just go again.” And before he could answer Lance already took position forcing his shoulders loose. This was an important scene. Killer clown facing off with the heroine for the last time. And Lance kept messing it up. 

But instead of calling ‘action’, Coran moved again, sidling up to Lance and placing a firm hand to his back. “Is something going on?” 

Lance sighed. “It’s nothing.”

It wasn’t nothing. Lance just needed to get this scene over and done with as quickly as possible and was frustrated that he couldn’t get any of his lines right, let alone not trip over the set. Killer clowns did not trip. 

Coran didn’t move. Instead he smoothed his hand over Lance’s back until he reached his shoulder and gave a tight squeeze. 

“You’re my top actor. You’re never off form. So when you struggle like this, don’t think that I can’t see you! Now tell me, what’s wrong?”

Lance sighed again. A longer one this time that seemed to deflate his body as he rolled his head forward.

“Keith called during the break. Sammie’s ill and he’s been called into work early so I’ve gotta go home and look after her which would have been fine but then I keep messing up this scene and it’s taking too long and Keith’s gotta go in like 10 minutes!”

What had started off as a simple simple statement had rocketed into stress and Lance was left huffing up at the clock. He was supposed to be home by now. 

“Ahh,” Coran noised almost in a hum, voice a smooth calmness he never seemed to lose. It was something that made him such a great director to work with. “So your daughters ill.”

Lance nodded. The image of his poor girl curled up on the sofa with a small frown on her face instead of reaping havoc like usual made his stomach hurt.

“How old is she?”

“Three next month.” Lance said easily. He could still remember the day the foster home called him to tell them the news they’d be getting a daughter. Lance had been nervous at the prospect of a baby, an older kid might have meant less broken nights. But when he held Sammie in his arms for the first time, he couldn’t bare the thought of putting her down - even Keith struggled to get a cuddle in that first day. And now she was old enough to go to nursery. And couldn’t leave her daddy Keith alone. Lance wasn’t jealous. But it was definitely because of the hair. Papa Lance didn’t have long hair and Sammie had a penchant for plaiting - a skill Lance taught her by the way!

“You should go.” 

Lance stopped his thoughts. He blinked at Coran, but the man just slapped him on the back again, hard enough to make Lance stumble. 

“You should go.” He repeated, before taking on a wistful glow “I remember when my niece was that age. Couldn’t bear to part with her, much to the annoyance of her father. So I understand. There’s more to life than the workplace. Go be with your daughter, we’ll reshoot tomorrow. Sound good?”

Lance couldn’t believe his luck. 

“Sounds great! Thank you so much Coran!”

The man simply smiled as Lance bounded off, rushing about the set to grab his things. 

“Let me know how young Sammie’s doing!” Coran called, still in place. 

“I will!” Lance yelled back over his shoulder, already out the door. If he hit all green lights he could be home in fifteen minutes. Keith would only be a few minutes late to work and Sammie could be sipping Lance’s classic homemade from the tin soup in no time!

As soon as he parked the car, Lance ran up the steps to the house, scrambling with his keys in his haste to burst through. “I’m home!” He called, slamming the door behind him and angling his head up the stairs.

“Hey- OH MY GOD!” 

Keith had rounded the corner from the kitchen, when he came to an abrupt halt, throwing his hands into the air and taking on the face of a startled rabbit. His phone clattered to the floor as his body froze, eyes wider than dinner plates. 

“What?” Lance yelped, whipping around to check there wasn’t a knife-wielding ghost behind him. Keith never got scared. Which meant mortal danger was imminent.

“What’s going on!? Are we okay!?”

Lance had expected Keith to switch into police mode then. Make a bunch of commands and kick ass. But instead, the man gave a sigh of relief slumping against the wall. 

“Oh thank god.” Keith breathed, hand clutched to his chest. Lance gave him a curious look.

From further inside, there was a ringing voice, curious too. “Daddy?” 

Sammie waddled out the kitchen, frowning at her dad. Then she noticed the phone and lost interest, crouching down to grab it. Sammie liked phones. She also liked sugary sweets. And her permanent sticky fingers were like cyanide to the screen. Keith immediately sprang back up in alarm. Lance was about to laugh but his worry was aimed right at Lance. 

“You’re still in costume.” He hissed. 

Lance was thrown. He looked down at his wrists to find mucky lace cuffs flouncing around his hands. Striking red polka dot sleeves led on from them, covered in rips and splatters of something darker. With an air of apprehension, Lance reached up to wipe his cheek. It was damp. And when he brought his hand back down, thick white paint covered his fingers.

“Oh crap!” Lance announced suddenly, “sorry Sammie!” 

And then he bolted for the bathroom.

Lance scrubbed hard at his face with a flannel, bringing away layer upon layer of paint. The make-up team always did a thorough job, and despite having a mini heart attack every time he looked in the mirror at work Lance found the never-failing standard impressive. The large blue circles around his eyes never faltered and the dripping black triangles down his cheeks were always in the exact same spot. Now they were grey swirls as Lance desperately tried to remove it with soap and cold water. He’d spilt he last of his make-up remover down the sink in his haste and now mumbled angrily to himself as he rubbed his skin raw. Water dropped from his chin and he had to tie the clown suit around his waste like overalls to stop it getting ruined. God, how did he manage the drive over here without causing mass hysteria!? No wonder so many people had let him go at the turnings. He was a living nightmare.

There was a knock at the door. “Can I come in?” Keith called, a little thud indicating he’d let his head fall against the door sympathetically. 

“Is Sammie with you?”

“No. I gave her some medicine and put her to bed.”

“Okay then.”

The door creaked open and Keith snuck in, smiling through the mirror.

“You could have told me you were busy. I would have phoned somebody else.”

Lance shrugged, throwing the cloth under the tap again. “Thought I’d finish earlier.”

He slapped the thing against his cheek, swiping at the white marks. Keith tutted, moving around to grab the flannel. 

“Can I?”

“If you want.”

Keith nodded to the bath and Lance sighed, flopping onto the side of it. Keith reapplied the soap, folding the towel into fours and putting it under warm water. Then he kneeled down, reaching up to gently slide the cloth down Lance’s cheek. 

“Better?”

“Better,” Lance breathed, letting his eyes slip shut. Keith’s touch was a lot nicer than the cheese grater Lance was treating his face with before. It was kind of like being in a spa. Or the early days of their relationship when Lance got ill and Keith would gently dab his forehead with a wet cloth, snuggling in close despite the risk of catching a cold. Lance relaxed into the bath, slowly leaning into Keith’s touch and humming to himself. 

“Don’t you need to go to work?”

“Shiro’s covering.” Keith said easily. “Said I’ve got a killer clown to deal with.”

Lance snorted. “Maybe a clown sure.”

“You’re not a clown.”

“Think I am.” Lance said with a sigh. Keith moved the cloth away and Lance let his eyes fall open. “I ran all the way here without even thinking about changing. We have a two year old!? I could have killed her with the fright!”

Keith laughed softly. “I don’t think she saw.”

“She better not have.”

It was quiet a moment, just the buzz of the extractor fan above them.

“But why did you run?” Keith asked finally, placing the cloth on his knees. “I could have called someone else to babysit. Hell, I could have just told Captain Kolivan I couldn’t come in.”

“But I wanted to,” Lance said, feeling the words right down to his chest. “When you said Sammie was ill I couldn’t stop thinking about it. Even if you didn’t have work I’d still have wanted to be here. I was a mess on set. I kept tripping on the door I was breaking down and messing up my lines! It was so embarrassing! I don’t even know why! You were here! You had it under control! Me, on the other hand, I rush around looking like bloody murder!”

Lance huffed at the end of his speech. Keith had his head ducked, hiding small hiccups of laughter to himself. Lance would be mad if it wasn’t so infectious. 

“I’m a mess.” Lance said eventually. Keith shook his head. 

“You just care. And that’s nothing to be ashamed of.”

The man got to his feet, dumping the flannel in the sink and settling next to Lance on the tub. 

“It’ll get easier.” He said, knocking their shoulders together, “but Sammie’s still so young. And we’re still so new to this. We’re gonna make mistakes. But I think it’s okay when they’re because we care.”

Lance hummed. Then he leaned down to rest his head on Keith’s shoulder. He always did have a knack of saying the right thing when he needed to. And it made Lance’s tummy warm.

“How is she?” 

“Good. Says her stomach still hurts, but no vomiting since lunchtime.”

“Lovely.”

They sat quietly a moment. 

“You wanna go watch the first killer clown film and fall asleep on the sofa?” Keith asked.

“It’s only my favourite lullaby.”

Keith laughed softly, squeezing Lance into his side before leaving to get the film ready. Lance splashed his face with water. He did feel like a mess. But somehow, Keith made him feel like it was okay.

A few hours later, Lance woke up with a warm weight on his chest. The couple had fallen asleep tangled up on the sofa - Lance against the cushions, Keith against Lance. Two mugs lay abandoned on the floor, corner of the blanket trailing in one and the remote lying face down on top of the other. The TV still glowed in the background. Lance clutched Keith close and tried to manoeuvre around to grab the remote. Keith gave a pathetic noise of protest. 

“Just switching off the TV.” Lance whispered, ducking down to kiss his head before he froze. In front of the rolling credits was a shape blocking out the little white letters leaving the screen.

“Papa?” 

Sammie turned around where she sat directly in front of the TV, tiny fist rubbing her eye. Lance’s stomach fell through the floor.

“Yes honey?” He asked, voice becoming high in his apprehension. 

“I really liked that film.”

Lance had more problems on his hand than he thought.

[diminuel]

15x11 rewatch! Let’s go! It’s again, very long, so read below the cut!

My recap of last week to orient myself: We’ve seen Sam and Dean struggle with issues that they usually don’t have. Garth’s theory is that they are now faced with “normal people problems”, things a writer glosses over when it gets to their heroes because it slows down the story. However, they aren’t only faced with lactose intolerance but also suddenly find that they have trouble with all skills they used while hunting - they can’t open locks (at least not with make shift tools and when they’re stressed), they cannot fight against monsters (that are vastly overpowered while they just have human abilities), etc.

At the end of the episode Garth suggested a magical fix to their issues and we see them decide they would head to Alaska. Meanwhile, Cas is glaringly absent on a not further specified mission to Heaven. (*rolls eyes*)

Now, on twitter I said that if Sam and Dean went to Alaska to find a magic fix it for their issues without talking it through with Cas first they are “embarrassing dumbasses”. Spoiler alert: they are embarrassing dumbasses.

Now we start the reaction. I will bundle this sections since there are two plots that progress 98% independently of each other.

A: Misadventures in Alaska

- I know that Cas is absent, but I wish the Winchesters would have waited long enough to dicuss the issues with Cas. Sam does afterall talk it through with Eileen. And he must have talked to other people about it because he knows that it’s not in the lore and nobody else ever heard of it apart from Garth. But waiting for Cas to discuss with him was too much of a hassle...?

- Dean might not be able to digest cheese now, but he knows how to help himself. Like a normal person. (Well, I’m a normal person too but I just risk it and then suffer the dire consequences.)

- Okay, so they are in Alaska already. Don’t you have to cross through Canada to get to Alaska? If yes, how did they manage to cross the border with all the weapons in their trunk and without valid ID?

- I love Sam’s bewildered reply to when Dean claims that he was playing pool since before Sam was born. “What, between nap time and snack?”

- I was constantly worried that Dean was too cocky about his pool skills considering he had lost some other skills and that he would get into this game without even making sure that he still had the necessary skills for it. However, this episode isn’t the kind of silly overkill like last one was. Pool is a skill Dean and Sam developped over years and years, so of course they should be able to do it. (It’s not the same as lockpicking with a random nail)

- Dean “baiting” the other players wasn’t super elegant for someone who’s hustled pool for years *lol* But it was cute I guess?

- I like that Sam tries to talk to people and make them leave before it’s too late.

- Fortuna’s a dick, not winning any parent of the year awards...

- I like how Dean’s sure enough of himself to know that he’s much more complex than a “sexy but skimmable beach read”

- I think that usually the villains agree to Sam and Dean’s demands far too easily even though they have nothing to bargain with. So I assume Fortuna not agreeing to Sam’s terms falls under Sam and Dean no longer having their god given hero bonuses.

- I really appreciate the explanations we got on how Gods and all the other gods can exist at the same time. Humans/ human needs creating gods has always been my headcanon.

- Fortuna called Sam “little minx” *lol*

- Hero’s luck is a thing independently of Chuck then, but still granted by a divine being. But what makes a hero a hero is not their luck - but their choices and their attitude. Fortuna recognized that in them: bravery, the willingness to risk it all for others.

- I’m not sure yet what “don’t play his game, make him play yours” means. Though it’d be interesting if the same thing that happened to Metatron (who tried to play God) happens to God. God as “one of them”. Give him a soul and the weight of it, so he experiences the story and creation differently. I don’t know. I feel there aren’t enough episodes left for such a “remind God of the beauty and value of his creation” kind of plot.

B: Agent Lizzo

(I think this story line is more interesting than the monster of the week case and should have been given more screentime)

- “CASS”. Sam, that’s not how you spell his name. And why did you write a note instead of texting him? Also, they explained nothing. 

- Jack’s “Wanted by the FBI” picture is pretty cute. I wonder who took it.

- I like how Cas now frequently has a very visible reaction to things; he pulls the phone away from his hears, his expression changes, he has to breathe, before he manages to regain his composure. (Like the phone call he had with Dean while they were still seperated)

- Cas is so cute sitting at the desk with his laptop

- Why Jack. Why do you just sit down in the office to eat the heart?

- We usually saw Jack heal instantly; can’t he heal now or doesn’t he bother to heal his wounds?

- How many Grigori hearts did Jack eat...?

- Jack’s “dark” in ways he wasn’t before. The kind of dialogue he has comes across as very Winchester/ Cas like. I’m also trying to figure him out. He looks to the side at one point, before the Grigori takes his sword, which I assume means he saw Cas? His next expression is hard to describe; his nostrils flare, his calm expression drops. Is he shocked (I doubt it), is he angry (why would he?), is he trying to get out of the ropes to help or run? During the time it takes for Cas to defeat the Grigori, his expressions calms again and he lowers his head again. Maybe I’m just reading too much into it. I’m not very good at reading expressions anyway...

- The hug was nice but I really wish Cas and Jack would have actually spoken to each other. :/

TFW back together

- Dean and Sam are given the “little extra” that Dean wanted: Jack and Cas are back.

- I wish Sam had a bit of a more profound reaction. It’s the kind of welcome back reaction that would have been appropriate if Jack had just come back from a trip to the Swiss Alps where he tried to find himself among the cows and mountain spirits. Not when he came back from being killed by God.

- Dean’s reaction on the other hand was more impactful to me. Here we see that there’s tension there, some unspoken things. But still, he touches Jack the way that Bobby used to touch him. It’s a fierce look, but a gentle, parental touch. At the same time, this scene also addressed how much has changed (for the better!) between Dean and Cas. Dean seeks out Cas for conformation. I’m very soft about that exchange. (I think it also again presents Cas and Dean as an unit, especially when it gets to Jack.)

- I do hope Jack and Dean will hug eventually because the scene switch was a bit too fast for me. A bit more talk would have been better, or guiding them over into the next scene a bit gentler... Too many fanfic gaps here, even though the gaps are small!

- Sam and Dean acting like Jack ran away from them...? Sam: “You could have called.” Really, Sam...? When Jack says he couldn’t even though he wanted Dean says: “why not?” Why not, Dean? Do you really need to ask? And then Jack addressed nothing of what had happened and just brought up the current reason (staying hidden from god). Dude! You killed their mother, they wanted to trap you, then they wanted to kill you! I mean, come on.

- If Grigori hearts are the beginning, then what is next? Grigori are some of the “failed” creations of God that, according to Cas, should have been wiped out by the Flood. So maybe there are other things that God didn’t like for some reason or another that he wanted to get rid of. Grigori wiped out, Leviathan locked away, Nephilim forbidden... Hm. 

- From S11 we know that you can’t kill God. Killing God is not an option... (I also don’t really want it to happen. If the ending is literally creation being wiped out and there is nothing but a black screen at the end then I will have a panic attack.)

New things going forwards: 

Dean and Sam are heroes, no matter what Chuck says. Maybe they are no longer the heroes of his story (here I remember Metatron’s words again “you’re not the hero of this story, you are the villain”). But they’re still heroes. Fortuna rewards them for that alone with hero’s luck, which might give them back their bonuses to a certain degree. But the fact is that Sam and Dean are ordinary humans who become heroes because they are compassionate and brave and while they receive no reward for it, no “great recognition of their deeds”, they matter to the humans they saved. They matter in the smaller scheme of things, in the ways that Chuck disregards. Here I’m thinking of what Cas realized when he became human: that there is dignity in what he does, even if there is no divinity in it, even though it’s meaningless and “below him” even by Dean’s standards. But it mattered to Cas. He hurt, but it was meaningful and he wanted to live his life anyway. Chuck doesn’t see that. Chuck doesn’t see the dignity and meaning in the small things of human life. Because they are nuisances to him, they don’t make stories. Just like Sam and Dean doing the laundry all day don’t make stories for him - but they do for Becky.

So I think this episode reaffirmed what early SPN established: it’s the story of humans and how they save people, even if the odds are against them, and that makes them heroes. And not the other way around.

Some general comments: This is totally subjective but I feel there were some extra scenes that could have been cut (some pool hall stuff, the Grigori thing could have been slimmed down a bit) to give more space to things which I found more relevant like Cas/TFW’s reunion with Jack. I know that fanfic will fill the gaps eventually, but I wish we had to do a bit less work, you know? *lol* I mean, how did Cas and Jack’s conversation go, how was the drive back? How long where they in the Bunker by the time Sam and Dean came back from Alaska? What did they talk about? What conversations were exchanged in the scene break between TFW reuniting and them sitting at the map table? So many scenes to fill.

[crushedbyhyperbole]

Cleared for Duty - Chapter 2

Have you read chapter one?

Chap Summary:  Bucky lets his temper get the better of him and things go too far in the final assessment.  Dr Edwards has been holding out on the team, hiding skills that would rival Black Widow behind a pristine white lab coat.After they face off, Bucky is forced to assess himself and he’s not too happy about a realisation lurking in his subconscious.

Warnings:  Continued violence, self-hatred, anguish, and language from the first chapter.

A/N:  I know Edwards’ skills are extreme but I wanted to play her as a bit of a wild card and possibly throw her in a mission with Bucky later in the series.  I envisioned her fighting style to be a hybrid between X-Men Mystique and Black Panther.

The Beatdown

The Doc was quick, I’ll give her that.  The basic blocks were effortless for her, even when I pushed her on the strength aspect, she adapted the blocks adding twists and flicks to her movement so she was more carrying the momentum away rather than stopping it.  Her motions were smooth, fluid – like water, and she was graceful.  All this I noticed at the back of my mind because I was solely focused on my own movements.

The more advanced blocks had her switching her stances almost as if she was dancing, shifting her centre of gravity as needed.  She was flawless and it infuriated me.

Overstepping my own balance gave her an opportunity to parry from a block where she deflected the metal arm across my body so easily it was like I was a child.  She dug me sharply in the ribs just under the join between my own flesh and the arm.  Of course she knew my weak points, she knew everything about me and the infernal contraption I relied upon to do my job.

I hissed at the pain that bloomed under the skin, and she smirked.

The assessment requirements didn’t state that candidates should strike if they could during the first phase but it didn’t say they couldn’t.  Maybe she was showing off, maybe she did it to unnerve me.  If that was the case, it worked, not that I needed any pushing down that path – ever since we met she always seemed to have me on the back foot.

We paced, breathing a little too heavily from our exertions.  I’d gone harder on Edwards than any of the others.  I guess maybe that’s what Steve had been worried about when he tried to switch her with Maria Hill.  She acquitted herself more than adequately however.  In fact, she was better than all of the other’s I’d had with maybe the exception of the huge guy.

The Doc shook out her arms before picking up the rubber knife.  This was going to be interesting.  I couldn’t help but wonder what she could do with a blade now having seen her undeniable prowess.

The knife looked comfortable in her hand despite her grip being too light.  I’d be able to take that from her and then it’d be game over.

“Are you ready?”  I asked when she stood before me again.

She bowed lightly, a respectful reflex of her martial arts training.  I did the same.  It was only right that we were civil, despite the burning in my veins that told me I had to take her down.  

She moved her arms gracefully, legs shifting into a familiar stance I’d seen once already today.

My first assessment. The thin wiry man who’d been too eager to show off.  Were the two connected?  It would make sense if they were.  Was I the reason he’d been so desperate to prove a point, showboating to get the better of me because he knew his girl hated my guts?  Was she his girl?  I couldn’t remember seeing them together but then again I tried to avoid her as much as possible, it would be easy to miss something like that.

And here she was now, in all her glory, doing for herself what her man couldn’t achieve.  This was her lesson to me, to show me that I didn’t scare her, that she was in control, she’d defend his honour against me.  Her aim was clear; to make me look stupid.

Acid rose in my gut and I actually felt angry.  Seriously?  She was going to make this whole assessment all about the animosity between us?

I nodded, ready to begin. Ready to have this shit over and done with.  Ready to retire to my room and not come out for days.

It began simply enough, a few testing blows that had me blocking lightly, like she was getting the feel of me and how I fought.  Then suddenly she settled into herself and she struck purposefully, my blocks leading to parries that she would in turn block and open me up for a sharp dig to a vulnerable pressure point.

Her fingers were precise, each time she struck yielded pain for me and there wasn’t a thing I could do other than not parry when I blocked.  She kept hold of the knife easily enough despite my efforts to take it from her though she didn’t use it to great effect, almost like she knew I wanted it and would go for it at every opportunity.

She was smart and calculating but when an opportunity to take the knife next arose I ignored it, instead getting under her defences with a strike to the abdomen that pitched her back and onto the ground.  She rolled smoothly, finishing in a defensive crouch, gasping hard against the pain I knew I’d caused but her eyes never left mine.  Focused and predatory, she was like a damn cat.

We took our positions again, ignoring people talking around the edges of the mat.  This time she didn’t hold back.

She actually threw the fucking knife at my face and lunged straight after.  I caught it out of the air before it hit me but it was too late by then.  Her knee connected high up on my chest, the force slamming me down against the ground where she knelt on top of me, her left knee pinning my right shoulder and her right leg stretched out down the metal arm with her foot pinning the wrist. Her fists were poised to strike but she didn’t.

There was chatter on the periphery of my focus.

Her face was smooth and calm but her eyes were wild.  She was either furious or…

I tried to buck her off once but couldn’t quite manage it.  Blade forgotten on the mat by the metal hand, I gripped her ankle and forced her leg up, shoving her off so hard she was forced to flip back onto her feet. So much in control of her movements it was almost lazy the way she landed.

I blessed the strength in that metal arm briefly, then I was up and going for her, anger clouding my judgement.  I should have known the assessment was over.  It had been over before we took our positions after I first struck her, but we were both too riled up to notice.  Everyone else had finished and they were all watching us go at it like a pair of prize fighters.

Veronica continued to break me down with tactical strikes to my pressure points, once she even dug her knuckles into the sensitive flesh between my collar bone and the metal shoulder of me left arm.

I snarled through the pain.

Gritting my teeth, I caught her leg when she tried to follow through with a knee to my groin.  She grabbed the collar of my suit with both hands and hopped up, pushing her other foot against my chest where she used all her strength to wrench her caught leg free of my grip.  Throwing herself backwards in a graceful flip.

I had to admit I was a little surprised, I thought I had control of her but she’d thwarted me again.

Things were getting too heated and too personal but I didn’t care.  She was taking everything I threw at her.  I held little back.  And she was giving the same, bringing pain in places I never thought I was vulnerable.

We were both tired, me from several hours exertion and her from giving me everything she had.  Eventually she went for what would have been a killing move if she’d had a weapon.  It began with a kick to my inside thigh lifting to a kick to the head, which she knew I would duck.  Instead of following through she brought her leg back, hooking it around my neck and would have used my own body weight to roll me into a choke hold I would have had little hope of escaping without the strength of the serum and my prosthetic arm.

Had she landed the move, my neck would have been crushed between her calf and thigh, and the rest of my body opened up for attack.  A knife to the heart would have been the perfect finish, if she had one.

As it was, I saw the hook kick coming and threw myself forward, taking her down with me.

She struggled, naturally, but I pinned her to the mat between my legs so I was sat on her hips. Both of her wrists in my metal hand, held viciously above her head with my right hand drawn back in an aborted punch.

We were both soaked in sweat, chests heaving.  My fury had gotten the better of me but I hadn’t completely lost control.  I had held back on some things at least but I knew I’d fucked up when I heard people talking around us.

I looked up to find fifty-five people staring at me, a mixture of shock and awe on their faces. Steve looked pissed but he didn’t say a word, only shook his head disappointedly.

The sound of laughter brought my focus back to the woman beneath me.  She was laughing in between gasping breaths, her eyes fixed on mine.

I frowned angrily. This shit wasn’t funny.  I could have seriously hurt her.  She’d successfully goaded me into a dangerous fight and now she was laughing about it.  Unbelievable.  I let her go with a humph.

She grinned, rubbing her wrists before laying both hands softly atop my thighs.  It was difficult to tell if her face was red from the fighting or if she had just blushed, but the slow blink and heavily lidded gaze that followed it pulled at something in my gut that shouldn’t even have been there.

Frowning more deeply, I got up.  Not bothering to help her to her feet, I stormed out of the studio and hit the showers.

 It’s safe to say I was raging, but there was also something else.  The tight pressure against my groin guard was unwelcome.

That’s so fucked up.

Sure, she was beautiful but she hated me and the feeling was (is) mutual, especially now.  And she’s taken – that wiry-looking guy from assessment one.

Since when did that factor in?  You don’t like her.  End of story.  I told myself.

I let the water run over my body as I calmed myself down.  Steve had been right.  I should have let him swap Maria onto my list instead but I hadn’t thought it would affect me this much.

The heavy, wet slap of bare feet in the shower room told me I wasn’t alone.  I didn’t need to look to know who.

“You wanna tell me what all that was about?”  Steve said running the shower next to mine.

“Not really.”

“You’re gonna have to talk it out eventually.”

I didn’t reply.  I knew he was angry with me but was making the effort to be diplomatic because he knew that anger would only be met with stubbornness.  We knew each other well, and though I’d changed more than I liked, he hadn’t.  He was still the same caring, kind, selfless punk-ass kid, he just had a bigger body now.

“I don’t get it, Buck. I really don’t.”  Steve scrubbed under his arms.  “What did she do to make you hate her so much?”

“She started it by hating me.  Why don’t you ask her.”  I turned my back on him, still not bothering to open my eyes.  The water felt good.  It was hot, just how I liked it.

“I have.”  He said matter-of-fact.

“And?”  It interested me more than I’d care to admit.

“Oh, no you don’t.” He half laughed in disbelief. “You don’t get to hear her story and keep yours to yourself.

“Fine.”  I huffed and snagged the body wash I’d hung on the tap. “I know enough, I don’t need to know more.”

I knew Steve was trying to draw me out with the temptation of information.  He knew I liked control, information and knowledge was one form of control I could easily achieve, if only I’d trade the information with him.

Nope.  Not doing it.

I’d had a moment earlier where I wasn’t totally sure how I felt.  There was something underneath the constant resentment I felt towards Dr Edwards, something that threw everything into a different light.  I was definitely keeping that to myself.

We showered in silence for the remainder of the time, and when we were getting changed back into our regular clothes Steve stopped, leaning against the lockers.

“You know she completely kicked your ass, right?”

“Go fuck yourself.”  I scoffed.

Snorting out a short laugh, he pulled on his trainers and left me to my thoughts.

The dawning of a realisation isn’t necessarily a freeing experience.  Sometimes it’s painful as hell.  I should know.

Of course I knew she’d kicked my ass.  That delicate and intelligent Doctor had just flipped my world right upside down. Everything that had happened to me to make me the killing machine I was and the man I am now had been picked apart by the smooth motion of her body and the sharpness of her strikes.  I was weak, emotionally, physically… well maybe not physically but I was vulnerable.  She’d shown me that.  Shown me how to improve.  She’d always shown me how to be better, how to make the most of what I had.  Right back to the beginning when I’d come with Steve for the first time and she’d just listened when I’d told her things about my past.

I hadn’t realised it then but I’d opened up.  The words I’d said to her then.

I can’t trust my own mind.

I hadn’t had the arm then. My old one had been blasted off by Iron Douche and his chest ray of death.

She’d been so intuitive that I felt like she knew me already, and if she could see that far into my soul then she knew I was rotten to the core.  Could she read the pages of that little red book in the lines on my face or the harrowing memories that glazed my eyes over?  Could she look at me and see my death count?  The idea of that made me ashamed.

If I thought about it hard enough, I could pinpoint the exact moment I began to shut her out and it was right there, on the exam table, when she was helping Dr Harvey assess the damage to my shoulder.  I felt like I could trust her, felt like I could let her in.  But that was dangerous.  New things – dangerous.  Opening up – dangerous.  Allowing yourself to be vulnerable – dangerous.  Getting close to someone who could potentially be your next weakness – dangerous and stupid.

I can’t trust my own mind.

I had shut the feelings down, distanced myself, called her by her formal title, and when she did the same, I convinced myself that it was because she disliked me or worse, she didn’t trust me.  

After the assessments today, seeing how hard she went at me, I knew for sure that dislike had taken root. I’d put it there and kept it there so I only had myself to blame but it hurt a little more than it should.  Much more than it should, actually.  I couldn’t afford to let the feelings back in but I could at least acknowledge them for what they were.

I did like her, was attracted to her – actually that was the easiest part to explain.  The rest… well, that was all jumbled up with the emotional baggage I carried around with me.  There was too much of it to sort through to get it all straightened out, even with the therapy.

I guess it didn’t matter now anyway.  The damage was done and I’d just have to live with things the way they were.  I’d still keep my distance, for an easy life.  That’s all I wanted really, for things to be easy for a change.

Continue to chapter three >>>

[literalloserforhanzo]

Please don’t go!

 Hanzo x Reader SMUT/NSFW~

Quick summary: Hanzo and reader have been working together for a while now but he doesn’t seem to see her the same way. Could that change if they end up alone, under the influence of some alcohol?

“Ouch”

You called out and rubbed your arm.

“It was just a small needle (Y/N)” Mercy said as she packed away the syringe, she just used on you.

“This should help you ease your pain, you sure got injured this time.”

You sighed. “You know some people seem to fear, that standing behind a shield could protect them so they like to run off alone and pant for healing....”

Angela rolled her eyes at the thought of a special someone and shook her head.

You hopped off the seat and asked for the time, while fixing your sleeve.

“It's half past twelve, you might want to take some rest before Jack's party begins.”

Answering with a nod, you thanked her and left her office. Limping slightly, you pulled yourself to the elevator cursing the painkillers, for taking so long, to take effect.

Your body entire was covered in injuries and every movement was painful.

The Doors of the elevator opened and you waited for the passengers to leave before entering. A few of the newer agents recognized you and nodded respectfully, granting you a quick “Good morning Mrs.(Y/L/N)” before walking off.

You were about to walk in but quickly took a step back again, as another passenger unexpectedly left the elevator. Your teammate Hanzo walked out, posture firm, pace fast, wasting no time for anything, just as always.

“Greetings (Y/L/N)” He stated, raising his palm, just to turn around in an instant and walk away from you, just as fast as he came.

“Hello Shimada...” you sighed and walked into the elevator, resting your back at it's wall.

You have been working together for three years now and he was still not calling you by your first name. You asked him to do so many times, wishing he would just treat you like he treated anyone else.

“It's disrespectful to call your partner by their first name.” Such nonsense... but you did not feel like arguing with him. The two of you got along very well but.. it always felt like everything was so natural for him, he didn't seem to get a throbbing heart beat whenever you two got very close during missions or people joked about you two being like a married couple. He didn't get that shock through his entire body, every time your skin met his, whether it was accidentally bumping into each other ,while sharing seats in the dropship or you handing him his weapons. It almost felt like, he didn't care or as if he doesn't feel at all.

Numerous times, he fought attackers off, saving your life and asked if you were okay afterwards but every time you answered positively, all he'd say was “Good”, if it wasn't just a simple nod he'd give in return. Vice versa, when you'd save his life he'd praise your work and your skill, which made you feel quite good but it never went past a professional level, which was slowly driving you to madness. You decided to quit grieving as your body hit the soft mattress.

Hours later.

“Gold or Silver?” Pharah held up two pairs of hoops, wondering what would go better with her long, navy gown.

“Definitely Gold.” You stated, curling the tips of your hair.

“It goes better with your eye colour. Silver is too cold. Gold makes you look like a goddess.”

Pharah's eyes lit up at your compliment and she eagerly unpacked the earrings.

Sighing, you looked into the mirror and eyed yourself. You were pretty and you knew it. Almost everyone at the base thought so aswell. You always remembered, how Reinhardt once said “Stay behind so your pretty face does not get blemished, Herzchen.”

Pharah brushed your shoulder and you got the hint, that it was time to leave. “If I'm really as irresistible as everyone says, why is HE still able to resist?” You thought as you grabbed your clutch and walked out of your room.

McCree and Brigitte warmly welcomed you and your friend, with a hug. Jesse bit his lip at the sight of you and you could feel a blush creeping onto your cheeks.

“God damn it, you look like an angel. I wish I could switch teams with Han-” “I heard that Jesse!” Angela yelled out from across the room.

“Take a wild guess , who can bandage himself next week.”

Most agents in the room fell into subtle laughter and you nudged Jesse aside softly, before making your way towards your table. Everyone sat down and you got so lost in a conversation about Talon, that you never noticed Hanzo entering the hall. As you took a sip of your champagne, you could feel someone taking the seat in front of you. The sight before you caused you to be damn close to choking on your drink. His black hair was open today, falling straight onto his shoulders.

The Midnight blue smoking framed his every muscle better, than any fabric you had seen on him before. Bringing your knuckles towards your lips, you tried to muffle your cough.

“Hello Shimada.” you tried to gain eye contact.

Your heart stood still for a moment as you noticed what looked like a slight blush on his cheek.

He nodded and greeted you, quickly looking away from you. That was so typical of him. He'd always do that, whenever you were wearing something pretty. You decided to drink your anger away, ordering your next glass of champagne, earning a puzzled look from your crush, as you've never been one to drink more than a glass.

The night continued and it was time for cake. Jesse presented his special creation, a whiskey cream cake with edible golden bullets on the side, decorated just like his hat.

It was an inside joke between the members of his Group and Jack wasn't able to hold his laughter back. He had drunk quiet a lot already and his laugh echoed through the entire base. Angela and Brigitte cut a piece for every participant of the bash, while Pharah rubbed her hands together in excitement.

“I can't wait to try it, Jesse's baking skills are godly.” Reinhardt rubbed his stomach, humming along with his best friends daughter.

Angela brought everyone a piece but hesitated before she handed you a plate.

“Ah (Y/N) you already had two glasses of champagne right? The medication I gave you before is best not to mix with alcoholic beverages. You might not want to have any of this.”

“Sorry?” Brigitte yelled. “You can't just keep her from having this tasty sensation, Angie!”

She threw an arm around your shoulders.

“(Y/N) is the strongest girl I know, she will survive a piece of cake with a drop of whiskey!”

Mercy opened her mouth to say something but remained silent, as she felt Ana's hand on hers, who winked at her and led her hand towards you. Brigitte pulled the cake out of her hand and placed it before you. Everyone began munching the heavily topped cream cake , moaning in unison, praising Jesse under their breaths. The alcohol was taking it's toll on you and you became more cheerful, literally forgetting about your agony and all your worries.

A few guests started to bring out their presents and suddenly you remembered, that you forgot yours in your room. You told Pharah your issue and got up quickly to get it, hurrying towards the main hall.

As you left the elevator,  your mind went blank. You had started walking way too fast and your head was spinning. Your attempt to grab something failed as your nails only scraped at the wall unable to find something to hold onto. Seconds before your balance was about to give in, two strong arms found a grip on your waist. A shiver of joy ran through your every bone, as a familiar voice called out your last name. Hanzo, who seemingly just returned from the restroom, held you by your lower back and asked if you were okay. You could only see his silhouette and blurred features of his face.

“(Y/N) can you hear me?”

You mumbled a vague yes before your head tilted forward and your forehead hit his shoulder. “Damn... Angela was right about the cake. “

He hesitated for mere seconds, before he threw your arm around his shoulder, as he took a hold of your legs and carried you towards your room, avoiding eye contact at all cost.

Your heart was beating very fast and you could only feel the warmth between you two.

Struggling not to drop you, he typed in the emergency passcode, the two of you chose, to open your room's door. He gently laid your body on your bed, switching where he looked so his eyes wouldn't linger at one part of your body for too long. Holding the back of his hand against your forehead, he tried to read your body temperature, after noticing the slight pearls of sweat on your chest, which caused him to swallow hard.

“You're not well. I'll go get Angela an-”

“N-No” you stifled.

“Excuse me?” He raised a brow at your words, sure, that  he misheard your words.

“Don't go away.” You didn't want him to walk away again. The two of you never shared intimate moments

and even if your view was blurry and your consciousness cloudy, you could still feel enough to know, that you didn't want this moment of togetherness be over any time soon.

“But you are in need of medical attention. I'll be right back.”

He gave your wrist and lower arm a gentle rub and got up from his half kneeling position when you suddenly grabbed his little finger and locked eye contact. Your sudden reach for skin contact and stare startled him, causing him to sharply breathe in.

“Don't leave me Hanzo. Please stay.”

You stared into his deep brown eyes for a  few minutes longer, before your consciousness left your body.

A light pain woke your body back up, although it took a few seconds before you were able to open your eyes. Your sight was still blurry for a brief moment before you could detect your hand, fingers intertwined with longer, stronger ones. Your teeth began gripping onto your bottom lip as your sight wandered to the man, who was sitting next to you, head tilted upwards, dozing. Firming the grip at his hands, you interrupted his peaceful nap. He turned towards you then quickly looked away.

“I see you're awake again, do you feel any better?”

“Yes. I feel way better” your hand softly tightened around his, leading his eyes back to yours.

“Thank you.” you smiled at him. His lips parted briefly and he tried to stand up.

“We shall go back then, the others must be worried.”

He turned away from you and tried to free himself of your grip.

“We should at least tell them where we a-”

“Why do you always want to run away from me?”

You tightened the grip of your hand softly, brushing your thumb across the back of his hand.

“I-It's not that! I just don't want to be rude and leave a party without telling … uh.”

You had gotten up from your lying position and your other hand framed his cheeks.

“Yes? I'm listening!”

He breathed in. “I think it's not good to leave for a longer period, without telling the others. They might be worried.”

Your gaze wandered from his eyes to his lips which noticeably made him uncomfortable.

His hand slowly reached out for yours, in order to take it off his face.

Your smile turned into a frown.

“Am I disgusting to you?” You asked boldly.

He gasped out loud. “(Y/L/N) that's nonsense! You're an admirable agent.”

“Is that all I am to you? An agent ? A colleague?” You began to stutter, your words carrying a tone, audibly filled with a lot of pain.

Hanzo couldn't look you in the eyes, view embed to the floor. Slowly your hands lightened their hold and were about to slide off his skin but before they fell onto your side, he grabbed both of them.

“No.”

His deep voice caused your heartbeat to go from a strong, to an unbearable pace in seconds and your ears could not believe, what they just sensed.

“Then let me hold you,.... and call you by your first name.”

Your hands freed themselves from his, and slid up calmly, striping up the length of his arms, to his neck and jaw. His breath became louder with every passing second. You pulled him closer towards you and slid his coat off his shoulders.

He looked away, and kept his eyes off you. You placed your slender fingers around his defined jaw and guided his gaze back to you.

“Is my appearance not to your liking Hanzo?”

He tried his best to keep his eyes at the height of yours but something guided them lower.

“No, I mean ...you are.”

You knew what he meant but teasing him felt way too nice, to leave it at that. Too much time has passed for you to accept his answer as it is.

“I am ...what?” Your thumb ran across his lower lip and he felt himself almost lose it.

An annoyed grunt escaped his mouth, he felt toyed with.

“You are …gorgeous.”

Your lips parted into a huge smile and your hands wandered down his neck, attempting to undo his tie.

Your touches suddenly made him flinch. He felt his body temperature rise, as the fabric of the tie brushed against his neck.

“(Y/L/N)- uh...(Y/N)”

“Yes Hanzo?”

His hands slid behind you and rested on your lower back. You tried to catch a last look into his eyes before the gap between you closed, way faster than you could cope with. You closed your eyes and felt his face right before yours. You breathed in his strong cologne and the both of you just stayed like this for a moment, before you became impatient.

With a voice, as light as a feather, you whispered his first name, the sensational feel of his lips touching yours cutting you off before you could say more. The first kiss only lingered for a couple of seconds, he already tried to quit after a short momentum but you pulled him in for another kiss in an instant, turning the sweet vanilla experience he just had into a wild mix of kissing and exchanging eager touches during a short time. His hands explored every part of your back, his thumb playing with the straps of your dress. You interrupted the kiss, in order to unbutton his shirt, leaving him panting. You weren't finished opening half of them, before he pushed you onto the mattress and laid on top of you, holding you down by kissing you eagerly. You were more than surprised by his sudden burst of affection. You just couldn't understand, if he wanted you so badly, why did he wait for so long?

You pushed his chest away from you and bit your lower lip.

“Are we growing impatient? I wasn't done yet!”

After you opened the remaining buttons, he threw the shirt aside, revealing his toned chest.

Your hands brushed over it and you felt him shiver at your touch.

“You are so god damn handsome, do you know that? I can't believe, I had to wait this long to get to touch this.”

Hanzo looked away, embarrassed by your words.

You pulled him closer to you and placed a soft kiss on his neck, causing him to blush.

“(Y/N)....”

Planting soft kisses from there to his lips, you did not know how much impact your words and actions really had on him. While your lips were locked, he slowly pushed your body back down to the mattress, fingers trailing along your arms, taking the straps of your dress with them. Cautiously he cupped your face with one, and your breast with the other hand.

He began massaging your breast  slowly, earning a muffled moan from you. He stroked your soft skin and slowly pulled the fabric of the dress lower, revealing your pink coloured nipples. Your entire body was trembling out of joy, this was all you ever asked for and even more. Wandering along his waist, your hand stopped at the opening of his pants, quickly undoing his belt and button, your touch meeting his impatient hard on. You decided to go slow on him, to test his patience and simply because there is nothing sweeter, than teasing. Your finger brushed over the fabric of his pants, making him groan into the kiss. The bulge increased and he felt your lips part into a smile. He decided, that two could play this game, slightly tugging at your nipple. “Mhhm Hanzo.” You moaned his name out, knowing how your voice affected him by now. Your thumb and index finger freed his manhood out of both layers of fabric and stroked along it's length. His patience was coming to an end. He ended the kiss and his finger ran across your cheek. “(Y/N)..”

Placing a knee between your legs, his posture forced you to sit up. Quickly, he pulled your dress up and gently tossed it aside. You ran your fingers through your hair in order to fix it before he pulled you back into a short kiss.

“I really didn't expect you to be this hungry for my lips Hanzo” you purred.

“I didn't know how irresistible they felt...” he answered, as he eyed your exposed skin.

His bulge poked your thigh, pointing his impatience out, the wetness between your legs exposing yours.

“The second drawer.”

It took Hanzo a moment to register what you meant, before he reached out, to open the cabinet. He took a pack of condoms out, baby pink with a bow on top.

He huffed.

“Was this supposed to be a gift?”

You pressed your lips together and nodded.

“Read the tag.” you pointed out.

“Save a horse, ride a …(Y/N)”

Hanzo's face turned into a frown. He was clearly not getting the point.

“It was for Jack.”

You could see his frown melt away the moment you said that. Did he really think, you wanted to use them on Jesse?

He decided not to waste any more time and opened the pack, taking a single one out, tearing it open by biting the corner of it and pulling it open. That sight made you grow more impatient and more eager to feel him.

He took his pants off and his member now fully exposed while he placed the condom at the tip of it.

He put it on in a swift easy movement, leaving you wonder if it was his first time to do something like this. He kissed your cheek and nose while sliding a hand from your belly down to the place between your thighs, which you firmly pressed together. He interlaced his fingers with the strap of your panties, slowly pulling them down.

“Hanzo.” your hands held onto his face and you kissed him again, before he placed himself on top of you, your legs curling around him.

He took your fingers into his hands and kissed every single of them, before he guided them towards his neck. You wrapped your arm around him and he let his member slide along your entrance.

“Hanzo, stop teasing me like this.”

He kissed your neck softly and his lips formed a smirk, your heartbeat skyrocketing.

“Now who's impatient?”

While he showered your neck in soft kisses, his dick found it's way inside you, making you moan in return.

He began with a slow pace but quickly increased it, looking for his own pleasure.

Pumping into you at a steady rhythm, he tried to keep his noises at a minimum, much to your displeasure. You called his name out, in order for him to open his eyes, sending chills down his body, when he saw your half closed eyes, look at him, with nothing but pleasure written onto them.

He tilted your bodies a little so he could go in deeper and his pace quickened, breaths fastened and your moans became louder, your soft voice repeatedly calling his name, making it harder for him to remain quiet.

“Do I feel good Hanzo?”

He rammed into you unforgivingly fast and deep, keeping the line between pain and pleasure at a minimum. Your moans echoed through your room, in Synch with his huffs and groans.

You could tell by his face, that he wasn't going to last much longer, you dug your nails into his skin and kissed him. His voice went deeper and he just couldn't hold his eyes closed any longer. He needed to see you. You looked at him with hungry eyes , moaning his Name and he couldn't hold back any longer.

His lips parted and a deep sound of lust escaped him, revealing how good you felt. He thrusted into you strongly, holding onto your body painfully sturdy, causing you to let out a small sound of pain, which got him off even more.  

“Hanzo please, I can't hold it back any more.”

He moaned as he grabbed your wrists, pushed them down and sunk his cock deep inside you, your moan transforming into a scream of pleasure. He groaned , thrusting inside you a few more times, releasing himself into you.

The two of you were a huffing mess, chests rising and falling in synch, with your tired moans.

Your high was slowly drawing off, your eyes opened and pierced through his. Hanzo's face came down and met yours, kissing you tenderly before letting go and giving you the most loving heartache, you had ever felt.

“(Y/N) … I love you. I'm sorry that I've never showed you.”

“I love you too, Hanzo.”

He kissed you again before he pulled out of you and laid next to you. Your fingers automatically found their way to each other.

“Hanzo?” you looked at him with puppy eyes.

“Yes?”

“Please stay with me forever.”

He smiled at your words and brought your hand to his lips, kissing your knuckles with closed eyes, before giving you a soft look.

“Of course.”

[roxyspearing]

Falling in love with you (Part 4)

It's here! The 4th and final part of the series I've been writing for a year long set of challenges by the lovely @thing-you-do-with-that-thing! This part is for the seasons of love - heat of summer challenge, and my prompt was "was that an explosion or thunder?" which you'll find bolded. Majority of this is in Dean's P.O.V, with a very brief switch to Y/N's P.O.V :) My thanks to @wingedcatninja for her awesome beta skills!

Word count: 1,811

Characters: Reader, Dean, Sam, some god-awful witches

Warnings: torture of reader, major injury to reader, character deaths (minor), guilty feeling Dean, swearing

The story so far...

DEAN’S POV

I have no idea how much time had passed. Every minute felt like an hour, every hour felt like a day. Time passed, and I had to face the worst torture I've ever been through, even worse than every twisted, depraved thing I'd faced in hell. I sat there, that stupid freezing spell forcing me to watch and listen as this family of witches moved Y/N onto a table, strapped her down, and then cut and carved into the woman I love; see the blood run over her skin, all while she screamed and cried and begged. Not once did they touch me, the dull ache in my head from when they'd knocked me out long faded.

Once they'd had their fun for the day, they'd leave, taking the freezing spell off me, not that it made much difference. I was still tied to this fucking chair, and Y/N was getting weaker with every moment that we were trapped in here. The only good point about not being a living fucking statue was that I could talk to Y/N, keep her talking and breathing, even if at one point she went so quiet and still that I feared I'd unknowingly watched her last breath, and I wasn't even able to hold her. Today, I'd watched as that main son of a bitch, the one who taunted us the first day, had kept cutting into Y/N. I could only assume he'd put something on the knife he was using, as none of the cuts were deep enough to cause the screams coming from her. Once he'd left, and I was sure Y/N wasn't going to pass out, I softly called her name, waiting until she was looking at me before continuing. “Hey. It's OK. Just breathe normally. It's OK.” “I can't do this much longer Dean. It hurts. Everything hurts...” Y/N sobbed, her words trailing off with a gasp as she moved too quickly, causing one of the worst cuts on her body to split back open. “Y/N. Don't say that. Please, God, don't say that. Not you.” “We've been here for days, Dean.” “Sam will find us. OK? He'll find us.” I said, with a lot more conviction then I was feeling. “OK.” Y/N softly replied, her breathing levelling out until she was sleeping, and only then did I let my own tears fall.

They hadn't been down for a while. I didn’t know if it was by choice or not, but the few days without torture had been greatly appreciated. It had given Y/N a chance to heal a bit, and me time to check out the room. The cuffs and chains that held me to the chair were strong, but I'd managed to loosen one of the screws on the back of the chair. My fingers were bloody and aching, but if I kept at it then maybe I'd get enough room to wriggle out. When I wasn't working on the screw, or keeping a close eye on Y/N, I was looking around the room, making a note of any weak points or things we could use to our advantage.

The only window was blocked out by cloth and barred over, so there was no escaping through that. But breaking it would give us shards to use as a weapon, and if we were near anything else we could yell for help. The chair Y/N was sometimes tied to was wood, so I could easily break it if needed. And then there was the door. There was no way I was getting through that, so my only choice would be to grab one of them as they came through it.

Suddenly, yelling erupted from above my head. Twisting frantically at the screw, I missed the door opening, and it wasn't until a knife was dropped in my lap that I looked up, that evil bastard bleeding from his head, but still with a smirk on his face. “Your brother finally showed.” Sammy! I smiled wide, a relieved whimper coming from the other side of the room. “It's just too bad he'll he too late to save you both. Little Y/N over there will be dead, and you Dean? You'll wish you were too.” Walking behind me, I had no clue what the witch was up to. I had just a second to realize the chains around my wrists had been unlocked, before he leaned in. Then all I saw was red.

~ Y/N'S POV

The relief that flooded through me when the witch said Sam was here was overwhelming. But then I heard what he was saying to Dean, and the dread quickly set back in. “No. No, you stay away from him....” Struggling against the ropes, I had recognised the words he'd just said into Dean's ear. They were words I'd heard before, from a certain red-headed witch. When Dean stood up, I gasped, blood already starting to pour from Dean's nose and eyes as the attack dog spell took full effect. “Dean...” “I told you honey. I wasn't going to be the one to kill you. What better way to destroy the oldest Winchester, than by making him kill the woman he loves?” “You bastard!!” Laughing, the witch walked out the door, leaving me alone with Dean. “Dean? Dean! If you can hear me, you need to snap out of this!” With wide eyes, I watched Dean walk up to me, stopping barely a foot away. “That's it. Dean....ahhhhh!!”  A scream tore out of my throat as the knife went into my shoulder, Dean twisting it on the way out. “No. Dean! Stop! Please stop!” The next stab went deep into my thigh. “Dean....” I sobbed through the new burst of pain, “Please. Dean, please stop. Please don't do this. Please. You love me...and I love you. Please. Ple-DEAN!!!!!” Just as the knife tore into my stomach, a gunshot rang out.

~ DEAN'S POV

In my rage, I just about heard a gun go off. It was like having my head underwater and coming up for air. Slowly, the white noise ringing in my ears faded and turned into proper sounds. Closing my eyes, I can feel the last of the spell wearing off, the gunshot I’d heard having killed the witch who’d cast it.Shaking my head to get rid of the last of the drowsiness, I opened my eyes, and immediately wished I hadn't. Y/N sits in front of me, still tied to the chair. But that's not new. What is new is the knife sticking out of her stomach, the knife which I'm still holding onto. “No...” Letting go of the knife, I stumble backwards, tears running down my face as I realise what I've done. “De...” Y/N's breaths are weak and shuddery, and I rip my flannel off to press against her stomach. “Y/N. Oh god. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.” “Dean! Y/N!" I can hear Sam shouting for us, know he's close to finding the staircase down here. “Just hold on a little longer sweetheart. Sam's here now. I told you he'd find us!” I try to laugh at that last bit, make a smile appear on Y/N's face, but I can't make mine do the same. “Dean? You down here? De- oh my god.” Sam's voice sounds behind me, and I can just about make out him calling someone, but my focus is all on Y/N. “De...” “Don't try and talk sweetheart. Help's coming, OK? I'm-” “Dean...I..forgive...” Y/N gets out, before her eyes close. “No...Y/N? Y/N!!”

Two weeks. Two weeks Y/N has been unconscious. When the paramedics arrived, Sammy had to practically wrestle me to the ground so they could help her. I'd kept quiet the whole time we had to talk to the cops, letting Sam spin a lie about kidnapping and ransom notes. By the time we got to the hospital, Y/N was already in surgery. When the doctors finally let us into her room, I broke down at the sight of her. This strong, fearless, badass hunter was hooked up to so many machines, practically drowning in the big blanket they’d put over her. Sinking to the floor, I cried until there was nothing left, Sam holding me like when we were kids and I had to comfort my baby brother.

Like every other day I had been here, I got the newspaper out, reading out anything and everything. Sam had gone back to the bunker yesterday, to pick us up more clothes, leaving me to keep Y/N company.

“...let's see what's happening in sports. I know you love the sports. OK, Dolphins lost to the Buccaneers, Jayhawks won by 12-" I trail off as a flash of lightning past the window distracts me. The muggy Florida heat has been threatening to break for a few days, and it seems the storm has finally arrived.

“Hey Y/N. It's finally starting to rain. You're missing it. You love storms. Remember that time when Sam had the flu so we left him behind one hunt? On the way back it just started pouring down. And I'm swearing like a sailor, trying to find somewhere to pull over so we can wait it out, and I look to you and see you opening the window, sticking your hand out. And when we were parked up, you smiled at me, and then you just ran out the car, twirling in circles in the rain. You know, that might be where it turned from friendship to something else. I just wish....I just wish I'd known sooner. And that I told you sooner. Maybe then...maybe we wouldn't be here.”

Putting the paper I'd been reading from to one side, I took Y/N's hand into mine, and sat and watched the storm rage on. I was nearly asleep, when a loud boom sounded through the room. Nearly falling out my chair, I was leaning down to grab the paper I'd sent flying, when came the sweetest sound I'd ever heard.

“Was that an explosion or thunder?” Y/N's voice was deeper than even mine, and I scrambled to grab her some water as she started coughing, the last 2 weeks of disuse catching up with her.

“Y/N?”

“Hi.”

“I'm going to get the doctor, OK?” Before I could get out of my seat, Y/N’s hand grabbed onto mine.

“In a sec. I just, I need to know...”

“Dead. Sam killed them all.”

“Good.”

“I love you.” I blurted out. “I love you, Y/N Y/L/N.”

“I know.” A short laugh left Y/N as I roll my eyes at her Han Solo-ing me. “I love you too.”

Did I say 'the final part'? Epilogue coming soon...

Forevers and evers: @like-a-bag-of-potatoes @thing-you-do-with-that-thing @sillesworldofwriting @jayankles @grace-for-sale @juanitadiann @cassieraider @spn-dean-and-sam-winchester @billionsofpeoplebutyoupickedme @atc74 @there-must-be-a-lock @obsessivecompulsivespn @crazyspn67 @mrsbatesmotel53 @gryffindorofcabin21 @dolphinpink310 @alwayskeepfightingkaz-2y5 @goldenolaf25 @kdfrqqg @ellen-reincarnated1967 @fictionalabyss @percywinchester27 @heyitscam99 @just-another-busy-fangirl @amanda-teaches @tngrayson @girl-next-door-writes @feelmyroarrrr @blacktithe7 @growningupgeek @masksandtruths @jadepc @countrygal17a @maui137 @holyfuckloueh @tina8009 @emilygracespellins @polina-93 @emoryhemsworth  @r-alexandra01 @whimsicalrobots @x-waywardaf-x @be-amaziing @horsegirly99 @arikas5744 @bitterstar88 @hunterswearingplaid

The Dean Beans: @akshi8278 @ericaprice2008 @cuffski @ruprecht0420 @kathaswings @be @deanscarlett @hobby27 @captainemwinchester @deanssweetheart23 @yourvoiceislikearose @aubreystilinski @wingedcatninja

Falling in love lovelies: 

@deangirl7695 @belparsons @chantillilace 

@shutupiminlooove @shamelesslydean @cowbelle8 @mojean13

@allonsy-yesiwill @deansgirl79

[your-dr-imagines]

Hello everyone! I’m extremely excited to be releasing my first Danganronpa imagine to you all!

This idea was a platonic prompt I came up with to get the ball rolling on this account!

I do apologize in advance for anything that is out-of-character or if my writing appears slightly messy throughout my first few imagines! I’m currently still getting used to writing these characters and writing such long imagines!

Very quickly, I’d like to shout out the beautiful mods of @@saccharinedanganimagines ! Not only did I receive amazing help and encouragement from Mod Ouma, but seeing the amazing writing of all mods inspired me to start my own account! Thank you all very much!

The following imagines occur partially before, during, and after the events of UDG. There is also a trigger warning for mentions of past abuse. Please be careful.

Warriors of Hope being found by an Ultimate Therapist!Reader

Masaru Daimon:

- Masaru isn’t too keen on joining you. After all, you're an adult. There's only a few that he felt he could trust and you weren't included.

- In the end, the only reason he does join you is that he accidentally became separated from Nagisa, Kotoko, and Jataro while traveling through an unfamiliar part of Towa City and you seemed to know the area rather well.

- He was distant at first, claiming that you weren't worth his full attention.

- Despite his words, you were able to see that facade and he, going against his usual nature, could sense that you were aware.

- It took the first two hours of the trek for him to warm up to you at all.

- The long journey across the city eventually became too much even for the former Li'l Ultimate P.E. and he was able to find his way onto your back, arms and legs latched around you.

- As he held onto you and listened to you open about yourself, he started to do the same.

- His words were confident at first as he spoke about his ultimate and how amazing of a leader he had been.

- It wasn’t until he accidentally wrapped his arms around your waist a little too hard that you could slowly piece together his story.

- The second the small gasp of pain escaped you, Masaru practically launched himself off your back and onto the ground, apologies seeming to fly out of his mouth at a mile a minute.

- He flinched away, his hands shook as you leaned down to reassure him.

- He became tense as you gently and slowly grabbed his hands, staring at you with large, uncharacteristically frightened eyes. He didn’t start to calm down until he realized what you were doing. You were trying to help him breathe.

- After managing to work with you through several breathing and grounding exercises, Masaru found his way onto your back once more.

- You didn’t say more than a few encouraging and soothing words as you continued to walk. It was worrying when no response was given, but with a turn of your head, it became clear.

- He managed to fall asleep against you, a soft, genuine smile on his face.

- You did your job once again.

Nagisa Shingetsu:

- It wasn’t an accident that you and Nagisa had crossed paths.

- You were a member of Future Foundation and had been asked by Komaru and Toko to join them in Towa City for the main purpose to help those four kids.

- The main problem was that you had been dropped off in the middle of town, far from the meeting point.

- Nagisa was able to recognize your wandering figure from the glimpses he was able to catch during your video call with the girls.

- Knowing your relationship and affiliation with the two, he was less reluctant to approach you and guide you to the base they had found and settled down in with the two other two adults.

- However, he seemed to step away when you revealed to him why you were in Towa City in the first place. The last thing he wanted was to have to talk to someone. That meant reliving everything.

- He was stubborn when he was sat down to talk to you. He wasn’t dense. He knew that you were supposed to help them, but he wasn’t much of an open person. He wasn’t ready to be so vulnerable around someone he didn’t know.

- It took almost an hour of coaxing for him to start talking about what he and the Warriors of Hope had done in Towa City.

- He shared with you how he knew and felt what they had done. He shared his guilt for killing his parents. How he still felt they deserved his love and respect.

- Through that, he slowly transitioned into talking about what his parents had done. As he spoke, his mask slowly faded, his calm and serious exterior breaking as he gripped onto himself and tears started to fall.

- You made him stop talking, gently collecting him in your arms as he cried. You could tell immediately that he didn’t talk about his problem like he really should have.

- You held him until he eventually tired himself out, curled up in your arms with tear-stained cheeks.

- You couldn’t tell, but he found himself able to trust you faster than he ever expected he could.

Kotoko Utsugi:

- You had first met Kotoko during the children’s attack in Towa City. She had been out in the city after hearing a report about some type of problem from the Monokuma Kids and stumbled upon you struggling to pull your leg out from a large piece of rubble.

- She considered killing you at first. You were a demon and she had a job to do. However, your “absolute adorableness” became a deterrent to that. She briefly considered bringing you back to the base and possibly join the other, rather awful, servant they had.

- She eventually left both you and the thought alone, not seeing any real reason to help you or take you along.

- Your paths crossed again when the attacks finished. While the four Warriors of Hope were traveling towards the new base they had picked out, Kotoko spotted you as you limped across the street.

- Her hesitation was clear at first. She knew that she was responsible for the extent of your injury, but her trust in adults couldn’t just suddenly start again.

- When she realized that she was almost left behind by the others, she yelled for them to stop with a pout and ran over to you.

- When you finally saw her, you quickly recognized her, both from your previous encounter and as one of the children that had run the entire war between children and adults.

- Just taking a glance at her and the three other children that stood a bit behind her, you could quickly notice the signs of abuse. Of course, you didn’t mention it at first.

- Kotoko took to talking your ear off after deciding with Nagisa, Masaru, and Jataro to take you along for now.

- It wasn’t until several hours after settling down in one of the rooms in the building that you managed to sit her down and talk to her.

- She may have been a kid and most definitely not as intelligent as Nagisa, but she could see what you were trying to do as you asked her about things like her hobbies and school. She had seen this kind of thing plenty of times in books and movies.

- She was resistant to your efforts to open her up and help her at first, but even Kotoko at her most stubborn time couldn’t fight against your talent. Without knowing what was happening her was shakily recounting everything she had been forced into.

- She had been the one to initiate to embrace as she started to shake and cry, launching herself into yours, barely remembering that you were an adult.

- After almost fifteen minutes of being soothed by you, she drifted off to sleep, seemingly peaceful. It seemed you were someone she could really trust.

Jataro Kemuri:

- You and Jataro went to farthest back among the four Warriors of Hope.

- While times were still peaceful, you had seen Jataro at Hope’s Peak Elementary during a sort of talent show that was being held, showing off the talents of the students. Being a student/alumni of Hope’s Peak Academy, you had been invited.

- The interaction was short and not exactly sweet. The few minutes you interacted with the Li’l Ultimate Art primarily consisted of you complimenting and praising his art skill while he seemed more than intent in confirming that you hated him.

- Your next encounter was about two years later in Towa City.

- After the attack, Future Foundation sent an alert of another ultimate in the city to Komaru and Toko. In response, they gave the kids the job of finding them. Jataro was quickly assigned the job.

- He found you relatively quickly, though he wasn’t sure if he saw that as a good thing.

- You were worried for a moment, still a bit wary around any of the children in the city. It took you a moment to recognize the boy. What gave it away for you were his eyes.

- Jataro was able to recognize you rather quickly. He was slow, but he was an artist. He memorized details easily. That included everything about you.

- He was able to remember how you had been so intent and sincere with your compliments. He was able to see that you weren’t bad. You weren’t like the people that hated him and that was good.

- He wasn’t particularly talkative as you walked, but he would respond if you ever spoke to him.

- The transition to talking about his past was smooth. You had brought up the talent show, asking him about why he had been so intent on you hating him and how it seemed to switch.

- His words were slow as he talked about her and how she always made him hide his face. Everything that she had done.

- You carefully picked him up and set him on your hip as you walked. His feelings made so much more sense now that he revealed more about himself.

- He didn’t seem to be extremely emotional about it, but the tears making his eyes shiny were extremely clear and revealed his true feelings about it.

- He stayed settled against you as tears slowly and silently fell.

- He fell asleep that way to your gentle words of comfort and encouragement.

[axidental-pol]

Don’t Save Me -Prologue

Summary: Reader goes home for Holidays and finds her family mutilated by vampires. She is then kidnapped and held captive. Found and rescued by the Winchesters...but does she really want rescuing? 

Word Count: 2600

Pairing: Sam x Female!Reader

So... It’s my first time to post it on Tumblr since I’m not really sure how this all works out quite yet... :)

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It was a late autumn evening with leaves fluttering violently in the strong wind. You were coming home for Thanksgiving break as your parents guilted you with your little brother insisting that he missed his “Sissy.” How could you say no to such an adorable request? Your brother was the most adorable kid in the world.

You could vividly remember the day your parents called you almost 4 years ago to break the news that your mother was pregnant. The surprise that you would be an older sister after so many years of asking for a younger sibling overwhelmed you. Memories of his birth flooded your mind with happiness as you parked in the driveway of your parents’ home.

You walked to the front porch seeing the lights off except for the television light that flickered through the curtains of the window. Your heart suddenly froze as you found the door opened. Pushing the door slowly, your heart began to beat loudly in your chest, “Mom…? Dad…?” Paling at the thought of an attacker, you run to the end of the hallway as a loud thud comes from the living room.

Grabbing the dagger hidden in your purse, you carefully turn the corner. The scene was something that you would never forget. The couch was overturned with broken glass from the lamp that shattered over the wooden floor. The carpet was filled with horrifying amounts of blood as your eyes followed the trail towards the kitchen.

Please… no…d-don’t be dead…

Your footsteps stopped as you found a dark body bent over a smaller one. His round face was tear-stained as his small hand lay limp across his attacker’s shoulder, as if he had struggled to fight. His eyes were glassy as the blond-haired monster dropped his lifeless form on the tile floors with a thud.

Tears began to form and blur your vision as you let out a feral scream. You swung the dagger towards the figure as it began to turn around. The figure moved so fast you were barely able to see his hand grab you.

“I wouldn’t do that if I were you…” Hard fingers squeezed your wrist forcing you to drop the blade to the floor. You growled in frustration as you gave a kick towards his groin. The figure grunted as his grip on your arm loosened. You grab your dropped weapon and hurriedly swipe the blade against the blond man’s face.

“It’s not gonna be that easy girly.” He leaned forward unexpectedly making your blade catch nothing but air. Your arm was captured and twisted around the back of your body. He held you firmly as his fanged mouth began to close in on your neck.

“Ben,” a firm voice announced another presence behind you. “You can’t harm her; master needs her untainted.” You let out a pained shriek as his hand dug deeper into your arm making you kneel.

“Ben!” the other man appeared in front of you as he reached towards his partner’s arm, “Master said not to harm her, he wants her…intact.” The grip loosened and you try to wriggle yourself free from his hold.

“Fine,” the man didn’t let go but he grabbed your chin forcing you to look him in the eye, “She sure is a pretty thing, ain’t she?” You shivered and struggled to turn your head away, “Let go of me!” you kicked at the man again to disable him but before your leg could land you felt a force on your head as you tumbled face-first to the floor. “She’s a feisty thing…”

Your vision blurred as dark spots formed while a frustrated groan came from one of the monsters. “Master said not to hurt her Ben.”

You heard the men shuffle around your body as one kneeled to hoist your body across his shoulder.

“It’s easier to carry her if she’s not struggling anyway Alec…”

*****

SPLASH!

“Wake up girly… Master’s here to see you.” you shivered at the cold awakening finding yourself looking up at three men staring down at you. The one holding the bucket stepped away and bowed towards a well-dressed man approaching you.

“Hello there (Y/n), I’ve been waiting for you for quite a while.” His cloying voice made you shudder. The wet clothing clung to your form as you tried to put on a brave front.

“What do you want from me?” the fear you tried to hold back laced your words affecting your attempt to sound snarky. You cringed, could’ve sounded better than that (Y/n). The man came closer until he looked you straight in the eyes. Glowing red eyes coldly assessed you prickling your skin as it roamed your body.

Wait… it’s a demon? A demon working with vamps? You stared at one another for a few moments as time ticked slowly in the dim room. “What’s a demon like you doing working with vamps like them?” his hand reached out for your face making you flinch away. “I didn’t expect you to know about what we are…but then again I wouldn’t have expected any less of Elmore’s granddaughter.” His hand caressed your cheek as its frigid temperature made your eyes close defensively as if it could save you from his touch.  

“What’d my granddaddy ever do to you?” his eyes narrowed as he stepped behind you.

“Let’s just say capturing you can benefit me greatly.” You rolled your eyes trying to calm down, “Humor me.” He laughed as he pulled a stool in front of you and sat down. “I suppose it would be humane to tell you why you’re here…” the two men in the back snickered as you glared at the bastard in front of you.

“You’re just going to have to be satisfied with the fact that you are important for my… plans.” He looked towards the two men near the wall and held his hand towards them, “My blade.”

“Yes, Master.” The blond man who killed your brother stepped forward and placed the threatening object in the man’s hand. You began to growl at the face of the man as anger and thirst for vengeance pulsed through you. He stared down at you while playing with the knife in his hand.

“What are you gonna do with that toothpick? Clean your teeth?” Great, you just dug yourself into a hole full of horseshit! He began to stroke your face as his hand trailed down your body towards your thigh. “Oh, I assure you when I’m through with this you’ll have wished it was a toothpick.”  He hummed quietly as your hands formed tight fists in preparation for the pain he was going to inflict.  

“I don’t really like to hurt people my dear…” you found yourself scoffing at him, “Wow, gee not hurting people…what kinda demon are you?” ridicule laced your voice as amusement flitted through his dark eyes. “You might not believe me but I only inflict pain when necessary (Y/n),” he looked menacingly towards your leg as the blade came down towards your thigh. You shook violently against the metal frame of the chair you were tied to. Your bindings tightened around your wrists as you writhed painfully. The blade’s jagged edge scratched muscles until it lodged itself closer, nearing the bone. The intrusive object was suddenly taken out of your thigh as it lightly sawed your femur. Your screams echoed in the small room as the black-eyed man caressed your face “Shh…it’s alright…” A sob threatened to escape as he plunged a finger inside the wound.

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!”

“Mmm… the smell is divine and…” he licked his finger as he moaned in pleasure. “You are what we’ve been waiting for,” your overactive nerves overwhelmed you as your sight started to haze. The numbing pain became more apparent as their voices obscured “We’re[HM1]  going to have lots of fun together, my dear.”

The room began to dim as darkness began to envelop you.

“Master, why’s couldn’t we just kill her like the rest of her family?” a chuckle echoed through the room as the demon placed the bloody blade onto the blond man’s hand. “Her blood can change the world, Ben.”

His hands held your face as you fought to stay awake. “Ironic how the granddaughter of the one who sent me back to hell is the key to my plans…” their voices became whispers as your head started to loll side-to-side as the fog of unconsciousness took over.

*****

When you came to, you found yourself in an empty room. Your leg had stopped bleeding but the pain was still overwhelming. You had to escape. You felt around the bindings and twisted your fingers towards your ring which your older brother, Jacob, had given it to you for your sixteenth birthday. He had it made so that there was a hidden latch that released a multipurpose saw and pick. You were never more grateful for your older brother until now as you released yourself from your bindings.

Grabbing your shirt, you tore a part of it and bound your injured thigh. I am never complaining about Uncle Lou’s training again! You hobbled towards the door as you listened for signs of a guard. Hoping they were stupid enough not to lock the door, you shifted the door handle and it didn’t move. Sigh… gotta work those pick locking skills. You reached for your ring once again and clicked it through the door. Finally opening the door, you peeked your head to survey the outside. Ok. Dark halls, no signs of life, safe to go. You limped as quietly as you could towards down the hall and smacked into…

“Well, well, hello there my dear.” The chilling voice made you look up as you found a cold smile with rage-filled eyes. SHIT! You punched the demon in the face and ran limply towards the way he came from.

“It’s not a good idea to anger me, (Y/n).” His hand grabbed your arm making you tumble towards the ground as he kneed your legs. You struggled against his hold as he tightened his grasp. “Fucking let me go!” He shoved your face towards the ground, “I don’t think you understand the situation you’re in (Y/n), you’re my prisoner and you will follow what I say.” You tossed your hips upwards to try and throw him off your back, “I am not your bitch!” Great comeback (Y/n). His hands grip your hair and he makes you look up towards the ceiling, “Oh (Y/n), that’s where you’re wrong…You are my bitch!” he whispers near your ear as he slams your face towards the floor making you black out.  

Several days later

The metal door slammed open and revealed a strange man with a machete in his hand. You stared at him blankly trying to get a hold of yourself. The dim lighting in the room made you squint harder as you tried to register where you were. You were back in the room that the vampire/demon tied you in but now metal shackles bound you to the chair. The man looked towards you as if surprised that there was someone being held captive in the windowless space. He lowered his blade as you started to shiver from the sharp air filling the room. Your clothes were basically rags and your body was covered with deep gashes inflicted by the demon. The man seemed to think that you were shaking with fear from him as he approached you.    

“I’m not gonna hurt you,” his deep voice sounded so calming as he slowly approached you. Your chains clamored as you shivered with the frigid temperature of the room. “Please…” gosh your voice was hoarse. He reached for the metal restraints. His hazel eyes mesmerized you. They seemed to have a life of their own as they seemed to turn colors. One moment they were green, then brown, and somehow they had blue specks swimming like little stars in a dark void of the galaxy. He seemed to be equally interested in your eyes as well as you both gazed at each other intently before he caught himself.

“So, you wouldn’t happen to know where the keys to these are would you?” a small smile plastered his face as you shook your head.

Heavy footsteps came from the door as another man with spiked hair came through the door. “Sammy, I think these will help,” keys dangled on the gruff man’s fingers as he tossed them to the long-haired man. The chains fell heavily to the floor as you held your arms towards your chest rubbing your sore wrists. The man who you assumed was Sammy kneeled in front of you. “Can you tell me your name?” Your shoulders shook as warm eyes bored into your (y/e/c) ones.

“(Y/n)…” you whispered as he laid his jacket onto you as you began to shake more violently.

“Can you stand up?” the taller man inquired as he stood up to help. You nodded your head as you attempted to use your aching legs. “Whoa, there…” strong arms came around your waist as you began to fall towards the concrete floor. “Thanks…” you croaked as you tried to push the tall man’s arms away from you as a streak of independence flared through you. “I can walk…” he let go of your waist as you took a step towards the door. Your attempt failed as you found yourself being carried by the hazel-eyed man.

Your arms slowly pushed against him, “I can…” His firm grip stopped your struggle as your face felt his warm chest, “This way’s much faster sweetheart and we got to get out as soon as possible or do you want me to carry you instead?” The shorter man smiled at you as you rolled your eyes in exasperation. Puh-lease! Cocky bastard…

You stopped fussing as you realized that they wouldn’t let you walk but as he carried you up the stairs the cold outside air made you wince as a burning sensation rushed from your thigh. You bit your lower lip and clenched your fist around the man’s chest as you tried to hold in the pain but a slight cry escaped. The two men approached a black car as the cocky one opened the back door. Sammy settled you in the backseat, “Ok, (Y/n) we need to take you to the hospital…You need stitches for those-”

“No, no hospital…” you shook your head adamantly as they loaded themselves into the front of the car.

The car rumbled to life letting out a soft purr, “But (Y/n), your injuries look severe.” The man in the driver’s side of the car eyed me in the rear-view mirror sighing as he saw my stubborn chin.  “Sammy the lady doesn’t want a hospital, I’m sure we can patch her up.” The hazel-eyed man turns towards you as you silently stare at the quiet scenery passing you outside. “I’m Sam and this is my brother Dean. Do you know anything about what happened to you?” you considered his kind face when you recognized their names. Holy SHIT! I know them! Uncle Lou is so not going to like this…

“Yes… my family was attacked by vampires and they kidnapped me because of my family.” Sam’s surprised face didn’t faze me as he looked silently towards his brother who reached for his gun. “I’m not a demon or a monster, I wasn’t bitten by the vamps either. Also, I know who you two are,” the car stopped to the side of the road as both looked at you wide-eyed.

“You’re the Winchesters.”

So I technically already have til chapter 8 on AO3 under the same name but I wanted to post it here as well so let’s start with the prologue!