#but the girls and ryan gosling made me so happy

[madamescarlette]

💐

[theharddeck]

start the new year right (jake seresin x f!reader)

pairing: jake hangman seresin x fem!reader (no y/n)

synopsis: what could be worse than a delayed flight with lost luggage? driving back to san diego with your nemesis. and what could be worse than that? the car breaking down in the middle of the night, on new years eve. and of course, the motel couldn't have a 2BR room available...

word count: 8.2k

warnings: 18+ explicit content, minors DNI: explicit PiV sex, oral sex (f!receiving), bc of who i am as a person overstimulation, not the BEST communication/consent, but everything is consensual! it's just implied; normally i'm better about explicitly asking and confirming

A/N: happy new year, friends! what would my year be, if not ending with me sitting down with a stanley of chamomile and writing more than i've written the whole previous month? hope this new year is gentle to y'all.

Natasha: Hey girl! Just got an alert that your transfer flight was delayed? Are you good?

You: ‘good’ as in ‘safe’, ya

You: ‘good’ as in ‘en route’, not so much. They overbooked the flight and the next one they have available is Wednesday morning

Natasha: nooooooo

You: At least my luggage is on its way to SAN… I’m considering renting a car and just making the drive from Vegas myself

Natasha: I love you and I trust you

Natasha: but an overnight drive by yourself after an already-long day is not the move

You: ugh I know, but i don’t know what else to do

Natasha: …mkay i have a solution but it’s not the one you want

You: let’s have it

Natasha: jake’s flight also rerouted through LAS

You: absolutely not

Nat: you didn’t even hear the actual plan!!

You: if it involves me and hangman, the answer is no

Natasha: it’s just a five hour drive, you can be adults/play nice with each other for five hours

You: when has Hangman ever been an adult about anything

Natasha: fair point

Natasha: but he is also currently texting me saying he’s stranded

Natasha: you know one-way car rentals are stupid expensive

Natasha: and he likes to drive so maybe you could sleep on the way

You: stop being logical

Natasha: i do not want to get a call from the nevada state police when you fall asleep behind the wheel on New Years Eve in the middle of the Mojave

You: good, add a guilt trip to the mix

Natasha: is it working

Me: …

You: it’s working

Natasha: (Ryan Gosling!Ken gif: SUBLIME!) 

You: lol

You: ugh okay text me his number

Natasha: can’t believe that after 8 months stationed at the same base you don’t have his number

Natasha: mkay just sent

Natasha: you have to promise not to kill each other

// 

Three hours later, you were really glad you hadn’t made any promises to Nat that you couldn’t keep. 

Because not only had Jake insisted on renting a truck (“I need the legroom!”), and that you didn’t need to stop in Barstow for gas (“trust me, sugar, I’m an Eagle Scout–I know we can make it to east LA”), the gas-guzzling monstrosity had fizzled out somewhere between exits along the 15.

Now the hood was smoking, there was no way you were getting your security deposit back, and you were just as stranded as you’d been when you first texted Natasha from the airport. 

Only now you were in the middle of the desert, and your phone was almost dead.

Four hours later, you had walked three miles back to the last exit and were checking into a truly shady motel, straight up refusing to talk to Jake because somehow, incomprehensibly, the only room available was one with one (1) king bed. 

Four and a half hours later, you were dripping wet, trying not to shiver because the shower you took to warm yourself up had backfired, since the motel towels were basically handkerchiefs and your wet skin made the room seem extra cold. You hadn’t wanted to wear your airport clothes to bed, but since your luggage was already in San Diego, that left you with just a cropped tee and boyshorts. 

“You okay in there?”

You glared at your reflection in the foggy mirror, since Jake was on the other side of the door.

The audacity of him.

When you’d first met Jake “Hangman” Seresin, you’d been determined to endear yourself to him.

He was a couple years older than you, and pretty close to infamous after that stunt he pulled in eastern Europe a few years ago. He was ruthless and reckless and good enough to get away with both, and you’d hoped that if you befriended him, he could teach you a thing or two during your own time at Top Gun. 

And he was ridiculously beautiful, which maybe – maybe – had your admiration veering slightly into crush territory. But you’d locked that down, determined to view him platonically, and not let that get in the way of any instruction he could give. 

Of course, the first words out of his mouth had been “Honey, you gotta know there’s easier ways to get your MRS degree than to become a naval aviator.”

Your crush and respect had evaporated on the North Island breeze, and it’d been downhill from there.  

You had no idea why, but he had been openly antagonistic at any given moment since then — doubting your competence but disguising it as care for your safety, and tagging a misogynistic “sweetheart” at the end of every condescending sentence. You’d ignored him as much as you could, hoping he’d get that he wasn’t in Dallas anymore, and that shit didn’t fly with you, but that had only egged him on. 

But now you were exhausted, cold, stranded in the middle of the desert, and practically naked to boot, and he had the gall to act like he cared if you lived or died. 

“I’m fine, Hangman,” you said, swinging open the bathroom door and beelining for the bed, hoping you could get to it fast enough that Jake wouldn’t make a comment.

Or before your tits froze off, at least. 

You didn’t look over at him as you dove under the covers, trying your hardest not to think about the last time these sheets had been washed, much less bleached.

Of course, the comforter was tucked into the foot of the bed, and you wrestled with it for a few moments before giving up, and hauling the topsheet up over your body. It was paper thin, but it was a semblance of covering, and you lay stock-still, closing your eyes and hoping sleep would magically deliver you away from this situation. 

A moment later, the bathroom door opened and shut again. 

You could hear the sounds of Jake brushing his teeth with the toothbrush and toothpaste you had bought from the “concierge” in the lobby (a relic of a man who looked like he did Civil War reenactments for fun, and seemed highly amused by your outrage at the available accommodations). 

You would’ve passed the time on your phone, but the last of your battery had given up the ghost while you were in the shower. 

A minute or two passed, and the bathroom door opened and closed. From behind your closed eyelids, you could hear Jake shuffle over to the lightswitch, and then he stopped. 

You waited. 

He didn’t move. 

“What do you need, Seresin?” you asked, tersely. 

“Are you cold?” 

Your eyes popped open, wincing at the brightness of the lights, still overhead. A quick glance down at your body made your skin heat – your tee was skin tight, and the thin topsheet did little to cover you; you crossed your arms over your chest, hiding your pebbled nipples, continuing to stare at the ceiling and avoid eye contact with Jake. 

“You could turn off the lights,” you muttered. 

Technically, the cold wasn’t his fault. 

But it was his stubbornness that got you here, so that had to count for something. 

“I was just asking–” Jake started, and you interrupted him.

“It’s the desert in December,” you snapped, “yet, for some reason, this motel has the AC on; of course I’m cold.”

As if on cue, the machine in the windowsill rumbled to life. 

You closed your eyes. “Please, just turn off the light.”

The light switch flicked off, and if it were anyone else, you’d have appreciated the immediacy of the response.

But it was Jake, and he didn’t merit any kind of gratitude, so you didn’t say ‘thank you’.

Silence stretched. 

You heard a rustling, and a moment later, you felt something land on your upper body. You flinched, pulling the material away from you on instinct, and identifying it by touch as Jake’s sweatshirt. 

You opened your eyes, peering through the shadows of the room. The curtains were thin (you were sensing a theme here), letting in lights from outdoors, and you found Jake still standing by the door. He was digging through his backpack, clad in a white tank and boxer shorts, apparently also not wanting to wear airport clothes to sleep, but that didn’t explain why he had chucked his sweatshirt at you. 

“What is this?” you asked.

He looked up, shrugged slightly, and went back to rifling through his bag. “I run warm.”

You pursed your lips. “Jake, I–”

“I had a jacket on over it at the airport, okay? Promise, it’s not dirty.”

That hadn’t been what you were going to ask, but you paused all the same. 

You appreciated that he was reassuring you, and you did remember that he’d been in a jean jacket at the airport. You’d noticed it against your better judgment, thinking he looked like an A-List actor as he walked through the airport towards you, all broad shoulders and smiles, like you were friends. 

“Can I have a pillow?” His question interrupted your recollection, and you frowned in his direction. 

You were clearly on half of the bed, Jake could see which pillows were for him to use. Did he expect you not to have one?

You pointed to the pillow you  weren’t using, confused, and he laughed quietly. 

It wasn’t a sound you heard much from him.

Normally Jake laughed like he was proud of himself, reclining in the golden light of the world around him, blessing you all with his presence. This was a different sound, less pretentious, somehow warmer. 

“Yes, I can see it,” he said, his voice still amused. “But I need it over here, for the couch.”

You blinked.

The couch was maybe three feet long, an atrociously patterned aberration that you’d tossed your carryon onto, and not looked twice at. Jake didn’t explain anything further, but there were still only two pillows on the bed, and you couldn’t understand why he seemed to think you didn’t need more context for why he wanted to decorate the couch with one of them. 

“Why?” you asked. 

Again, that quiet chuckle. 

“Because, sweetheart,” he said, and you bristled on instinct, “that’s where I’m sleeping.”

You couldn’t have heard that right. 

“You’re not sleeping on the couch,” you said.

“You’re not sleeping on the couch,” Jake said, stubbornly. 

“That was never up for debate,” you snorted. “Jake, we’re adults. We can share the bed. You’re not going to fit on the couch.”

“I’m an Eagle Scout,” he grumbled. “I can sleep anywhere.”

“Yes, loyal, brave, clean, etc, I’m sure,” you said. “But I’m not sure how helpful you’re going to be tomorrow, when you can’t drive that monstrosity of a truck due to your back spasming from being rolled up on that couch all night.”

You watched through the shadows as Jake stubbornly tried to wedge himself sideways on the couch. Sure enough, his knees were practically bent up to his navel, and even through the darkness, you could see the furrow in his brow. 

“You could drive it,” he said, too obstinate to accept defeat.

“I will not,” you returned, “drive a vehicle that ostentatious.”  

“Says the pilot,” he grumbled.

“Naval aviator,” you shot back. “Jake, it’s an enormous bed. Get over yourself, get into it, and the sooner you settle, the sooner it’ll be morning, and we can leave.”

He deliberated, the mulish man. 

But eventually he pushed himself off the couch, clambering across the room. The bed dipped as he slid into it, and reached down for the comforter, still wedged into the bottom of the bed. You tried not to be annoyed when he yanked it free easily. It was probably just momentum, or that you’d loosened it up for him. While he was rearranging the comforter, you pulled the sweatshirt over your head, and tried to be calm about the situation. 

His sweatshirt was somehow still warm. 

It smelled amazing, like cedar and fancy cologne.

And also sweat, which you tried damn hard to ignore.

It was cozy, and you snuggled into it, and a moment later, Jake settled. Thankfully, the bed was big enough that you didn’t have to touch each other, but that didn’t mean you could ignore that he was there. 

In bed. 

With you. 

You snorted, thinking how much of a dream this would’ve been to you eight months ago, before you met Jake, and he dashed your crush to pieces. 

“What?” Jake grumbled, and maybe it was the proximity, or maybe exhaustion from the day was setting in, because his voice sounded almost gentle. 

“Nothing,” you shook your head. “G’night.”

“Night,” Jake said. 

You rolled onto your side, pulling your feet up under you, and folding your hands under your face, so you didn’t have to touch your skin to the pillow. Of course, that brought the sleeve of the sweatshirt to just under your face, and you were surrounded by the delicious smell of it again. 

It distracted you for a moment. 

Just a moment. 

Then you had to acknowledge that, even with the sweatshirt and the newly-added comforter, your wet hair was no match for the chill of the room. Your legs felt exposed and the sheets felt like they were damp and wet, and you tried your best to ignore it, but soon you were shivering. 

You tried to be still, you did. 

But when you heard the bed shift as Jake turned towards you, you winced into the darkness, unsurprised. 

“Sweetheart…” he started, and you shook your head, refusing to look back over at him. 

“I’ll be fine, I just need to fall asleep.”

Jake let that statement hang for a moment, just long enough for your shivering to start up again. He cleared his throat. 

“Um,” he said, and if you didn’t know better, you’d think he sounded nervous, “I meant what I said earlier. About running warm.”

This time, you did turn over, trying to read his expression in the shadowy darkness. He looked…open. Like he really was altruistically suggesting sharing body warmth, nothing malicious and none of his normal teasing. 

You were suspicious, but not enough so that you could ignore that it was a better idea than freezing yourself to sleep. 

“You sure?” you asked, and Jake grunted, which you figured was as good a response as any. Actually, it was pretty damn good, because if he sounded eager, you’d be creeped out, and if he was uncertain, you’d feel guilty. But being matter-of-fact about it gave you the courage to scoot across the bed. 

“How do we do this?” you asked, and Jake reached for you. It was an easy movement, natural, enough so that it surprised you when he hesitated before touching you. 

“Can I…?” he trailed off. 

“Sure,” you shrugged, hoping you sounded half as unaffected as he did. This was fine, this was normal. Just a guy who was SO obnoxious that it made you forget how hot he was, suddenly not being obnoxious, and basically punching you in the face with his hotness.   

His hand settled on the small of your back and damn it, he was warm. His touch was soft, gentle, almost nervous, and he pulled you closer to him. You realized you’d expected him to turn you over, press your back to his front so that you’d be spooned, but instead he just wrapped you in his arms. He reached around you to tuck the comforter between you and the mattress, insulating you with his warmth. 

Your head was in his chest, and with his arms bracketed around you, your breath heated up the space between his tank and your face. He’d even managed to slot his arm under your head, so your face still wasn’t on the pillow. 

Cuddling with someone new was usually awkward, a tangle of limbs and expectations, but with Jake, it wasn’t. It was…damn it. It was pretty close to perfect.

“Good?” he asked, and he sounded different, with your cheek on his bicep, and your nose practically pressed against his chest. It was like you could feel his voice, rumbling around you, somehow more comforting for the proximity. 

You nodded, not wanting to hear anything new on your voice if you tried to respond. 

Jake hummed. 

A moment later, you realized his thumb was moving. Nothing major, just a small movement between your shoulder blades, a reassuring stroke. It was a comforting motion, gentle, and it wasn’t long before his warmth and his touch lulled you into a sweet sleep. 

You startled awake to the sound of guns. 

Not guns, fireworks. 

Damn it, it was New Year’s Eve; how had you forgotten? 

Jake stirred too, a deep breath expanding his chest, and leading you to realize his head was resting on top of yours, his chin tucked on top of the crown on your head.

“Is that–” he mumbled and how dare he, honestly, how very dare he, because he sounded great. Fuck him, for that, frankly. 

The situation washed over you, half asleep and fully cognizant of how random it was. You didn’t mean to start, but soon you were laughing, your shoulders shaking. 

“You okay?” Jake asked, a thread of concern in his voice, and that didn’t help any. 

“Just the universe’s sense of humor,” you said. 

You didn’t know how, but you knew he was confused and you should’ve been worried about how you knew that, how you weren’t cold at all, how if you looked up, you’d know what a  sleep-mussed Jake Seresin looked like, but all you could think was that this was so, so stupid. 

You took a long breath, starting to explain. 

“I just can’t believe this is how I’m starting the next year of my life,” you laughed. “Like, I’m fine, right? I’m doing alright on a career path I love, I call San Diego home, I have great friends and I’m doing as good with my family as anyone could be. And where am I on New Year’s? Stranded in a motel off an exit that’s literally not even town, cold enough that a guy who hates me is cuddling me so I can be still enough for him to go to sleep, with a dead phone so none of my friends or family can wish me a happy new year, and I–”

“Wait,” Jake pulled back, and you frowned at the interruption, “why do you think I hate you?”

You stared at him. “Are you serious?”

“Uh, yeah,” Jake said, having the gall to look confused.   

“Jake,” you said, disbelieving. “You’re literally constantly a jackass to me. You’re constantly undermining me, doubting or heckling. You throw in a – frankly overwhelming – amount of southern charm and expect that to distract from the fact that you’re being outrageously patronizing and—”

Jake kissed you.

You weren’t expecting it, and it was so sudden that it thoroughly cut off your train of thought. All you could do was comprehend fleeting sensations and emotions. Jake’s lips were soft, the pressure of them light and teasing against yours. His arms tightened around you, like he was steadying both of you. In the same way you’d sensed his confusion, now you sensed his apprehension, and an unfamiliar determination. 

Just as quickly, he pulled back. 

“I don’t–” his voice was rough, and he cleared his throat. “Christ, I don’t hate you.”

You licked your lips, annoyed that they had the audacity to tingle in response to him.

You wanted to ask what the hell that was. 

You wanted to ask why he was looking at you like that. 

You wanted to ask what that expression meant but more than anything, you wanted him to kiss you again. 

Your arms were curled up between the two of you, and it took so little effort to curl your fingers in the front of his tank and pull him to you. His mouth was on yours a breath later, and his hand was on your jaw, angling your face so he could kiss you properly. 

Of course he was a good kisser. 

Fucking of course he was, he had to be, but it was one thing to know it in an agnostic kind of way, and another to feel his lips pressing into yours. You shivered when his tongue swept over your bottom lip and when you mirrored the motion, something in his chest rumbled, and Jake parted his lips for you. 

He tasted faintly of toothpaste, and he had some kind of chapstick on his lips that was sweet, and you couldn’t get enough of him. His arms were still around you and he was so warm, so broad, and you couldn’t help but press yourself against him. When your arms wound around his neck, Jake broke away from you. You could feel his chest rising and falling quickly, and his hands fell from your back to your waist, as if holding you in place. He turned his head slightly, kissing lazily at the corner of your mouth, down your cheek, to your jawline. 

“That’s not how I wanted to tell you,” he murmured against your skin, and this time when you shivered, you knew it wasn’t from the cold. 

“You still haven’t told me,” you managed, eyelashes fluttering at the teasing brush of his lips, while you tried to look at him.  

To your astonishment and delight, Hangman blushed. 

Sheepish wasn’t an expression you were used to on him, not unlike bashful, but you thought it suited him. He looked like he was gearing up to say something and, curious though you were, you didn’t want to get into that right now. It was late, you were still exhausted, and just a few moments ago, you’d thought he hated you. 

If his expression now was any indication, you and Jake had very different conceptions of flirting. 

“Look,” you said, before he could say whatever he was hyping himself up to say, “this is probably a lot more complicated than either of us were prepared for. So, it’s the New Year…we could start it how we want the year to go.”

Jake’s shoulders relaxed slightly, and he smiled softly, a sweet expression on his face. He turned his head to kiss the palm of the hand you had looped around his neck. 

“Cuddling,” he said, at the same time you announced, 

“Orgasms.”

You would never forget the expression on his face. 

Sweetness morphed into amazement, and then quickly into hunger. 

“I can pivot,” he said quickly, and you lifted your chin. 

“You sure?” you teased, “Don’t want to strongarm you into–”

Your sentence ended with a squeal when Jake turned quickly, flopping onto his back, and pulling you on top of him. Your knee was between his thighs and you couldn’t hold back your grin as you looked down at him. Just like with this kiss, he was letting you lead, but being so clear about what he wanted. 

And who were you, to decline?

Kissing him from on top of him felt different, felt amazing. 

You could appreciate how sturdy he was, and when you relaxed slightly, you found yourself straddling his thigh. You’d been a part of plenty of dogfight football scrimmages, and Jake was never one for longer board shorts; you knew exactly how strong his thighs were. But it was one thing to see them on display, and quite another to feel them flexing between your legs. 

One of Jake’s hands was inching under his sweatshirt that you wore, warm fingers spreading across your stomach as you moved over him. 

God, he felt so good, so few layers between his skin and your core, and the pressure of his thigh between your legs was so good. You kissed him again, tongues tangling and teeth clashing, as you ground against his leg. 

When you moved, you felt the hem of his boxers slide against your leg, and sue a girl, you were curious. You shifted slightly, moving your thigh higher, and when you rocked your hips, your thigh brushed against his cock. 

“Fuck, sweetheart,” Jake gritted as you moved against him, and you thought maybe you didn’t mind the petname, when he sounded like that. 

You braced yourself on the pillow behind him and moved again. 

It shouldn’t be this hot. 

But it was, he was, and you felt pleasure spooling through you, just from his leg between yours, and his gentle touch against your skin. How he reacted to you, how he moved under you, it was so good, like a promise. 

“Not gonna lie,” Jake said, his voice still rough, “I really like you in my sweatshirt.”

Your mouth fell open when he pushed his hips up to meet you. 

You both stifled a gasp at the motion, the sensation with so few layers between the two of you. Jake’s hands crept higher under your sweatshirt, almost tentative, and you leaned into his touch, encouraging. His hands cupped your breasts, and your head dipped to the side in relief. He made a sound of satisfaction, just enjoying their weight in his hand, then his wrists moved so his thumbs could brush over your nipples. He rolled them, and you felt it in your core, your thighs clenching. 

“Love you in my sweatshirt,” Jake repeated, sounding dazed, “but I wanna to see you without it.”

You leaned back immediately, pulling the sweatshirt over your head. 

You missed the warmth of it immediately, but Jake’s gaze was worth it. His expression bordered on reverence, and he actually licked his lips, looking up at you. You wiggled on his thigh, heat pulsing, needing something from him, your skin prickling under his gaze. 

Jake frowned, the lust in his eyes overtaken by concern. “Too cold?”

You certainly weren’t toasty, but you couldn’t say you cared.

“I would’ve thought you’d have a solution to keep me warm,” you teased, and Jake seemed to accept the challenge. 

The hands that had been on your breasts dropped to the back of your thighs, and a moment later he had pushed you back. You were on your back, feet in the air, and Jake turned you gently on the bed so you were resting on the pillows again. You settled in, expecting him to lower himself between your thighs, and were surprised when instead he reached back for the comforter. 

Maybe you had misunderstood, he didn’t actually want…

He pulled the comforter over his head, over your shoulders, and you blinked disbelieving at a Jake-shaped figure under the blanket, moving to the base of the bed, between your legs. 

You were fairly confident, but that was a lot to ask from someone on a first date, and this wasn’t even that, and you ducked under the comforter as well. 

“Jake, you don’t have to–” you protested, realizing belatedly that there was nowhere near enough light to be able to make meaningful eye contact. 

“You said orgasms, right?” Jake said, his voice full of a familiar smugness. 

He settled at the base of the bed, crouching, and through the darkness, you could tell he was looking in your direction. His hands were intentional on your legs, letting you know where he was, giving you time to tell him if you weren’t okay with something. 

If he was offering, you were beyond okay with this. 

“Right,” you said weakly. 

His hands trailed up your thigh, his warm touch light, and his fingers closed over the band over your boyshorts. You nodded, a sound he heard because your head rubbed against the comforter.  

He kissed your thigh. 

It was a feather light touch, a brush of his mouth against the sensitive skin, but it was so gentle that it reassured you. He kissed your other thigh, then higher, and one of his hands felt up to your stomach, and he pushed, an unsubtle prompt. You lay back against the mattress, nerves and desire warring within you as Jake kissed higher.

You felt a brush of his tongue when he reached the edge of your underwear and your breath caught. 

“Plural?” Jake asked, and it took you a minute to understand his question.  

His fingers pulled at the edge of your boyshorts, peeling them slowly down, his mouth pressing gentle kisses as he revealed more of your body. He was exploring by touch what he couldn’t see, so slow and perfect it was overwhelming. 

“There’s two of us,” you managed, back to his question. “Hence plural.”

Jake laughed, a soft exhale against your skin. He’d bared you to him, and you shifted, like you were seeking his touch. 

“I know this is new for us, sweetheart,” he mumbled, a kiss to your hipbone, then the opposite, “but that’s not how this is going to work.”

You bit your lip, nervous again.

You were new to this with him, and some guys thought oral sex was some kind of prerequisite – check the box, half ass it for thirty seconds, guarantee she’ll let you hit it – but something told you Jake would be different. 

You were panting, anticipation making you breathless. 

You whispered his name and it was like he was waiting for permission, because he leaned into you. His first kiss against your pussy was gentle, just as sweet as those kisses he’d trailed up your thighs. It was so sweet it made you squirm, and Jake chuckled, a sound you felt as his breath ghosted over you. He pulled back long enough to draw an audible breath, then his tongue licked over the whole of your cunt, a long, torturous swipe that had you trembling.  

“Fuck, sweetheart,” he said, muffled, and your hips bucked. “You’re already wet for me.”

You reached under the comforter, your hands tangling in his hair and Jake hummed his approval before following your prompting back to your pussy. He lapped at you, learning you, and when he trailed up to circle your clit with it, you couldn’t stop the cry that escaped you. 

“That right, honey?” he asked, sounding smug, and he circled your clit with his tongue. You felt a hand slip from your hip to your entrance, rubbing over you as his tongue played with your clit. He kissed you, teased you, and when he pushed a thick finger into you while his lips closed over your clit, you moaned. 

“Feels so good, Jake,” you cried, and you felt him shudder at your voice. 

You heard it too, how wrecked you sounded, and it was his fault. Your hips were pushing up into him, chasing the suction of his mouth, the pull of his fingers. He was only a knuckle or so into you, but his finger was so wide, thicker than your own, and you moaned at the unfamiliar intrusion. 

It was Jake between your legs, Jake’s wicked smile, sharp tongue, capable hands, Jake who was working you with his fingers and mouth. He felt so good, and your body felt like it was humming to a frequency he set. 

You trembled as he sheathed a finger in you, you moaned when he sucked your clit, and when his teeth brushed over your clit, the pleasure coursing through you snapped. Your fingers in his hair tightened, and Jake groaned when you pressed your pussy harder against his face. He groaned like he wanted it, like he craved that reaction, and you came hard.  

He coaxed you through it, gentle and steady as he’d been so far, and as you came down, you pulled slightly at his hair. 

“Jake, that was–” you gasped, and you felt him laugh again. 

“Honey, what part of ‘plural’ is so hard for you to understand?” he asked.

And he pushed another finger into you. 

Your back bowed off the mattress; you were so sensitive and it made everything Jake did to you feel so much more. 

His mouth traveled down to where his fingers were pressing into you, and he curled them into you. You heard an obscene slurping sound, and your eyes rolled back as you realized he was pulling your release out of you, tasting it from his own fingers. 

“Like honey from a honeycomb,” Jake mumbled, his voice thick, and you whimpered at how he sounded. 

A moment later, his lips closed over your clit again, and your head thrashed against the pillow. 

“Jake, I just–” you panted, but he sucked again and you broke off on a moan. “I can’t, I just – fuck, give me a second– oh, that feels so good.”

Jake either didn’t hear you or he wasn’t listening. 

He was following your body, the way your hips were pushing up into him, the way your cunt was clenching down on his fingers, and it was like he was drunk on the taste of you. He suckled on your clit, his tongue laving over you, stoking you higher again. He felt so good, and you were sure you were telling him, but you were fast losing confidence in your ability to form words. 

You lost track of time, there was just pleasure, and the heat from Jake, and the way he was working your body. 

“You gonna come for me again?” Jake coaxed, pulling back to blow a long stream of cool air over your clit. You flinched, you writhed, you would do whatever he wanted, as long as he didn’t stop. “I think you can do it, honey, it was so pretty the first time. This pussy is so good, doing such a beautiful job coming for me, tasting delicious and I bet you can do it again…”

Your legs felt limp as he licked over you again, tasting where his fingers fed into you, pumping them and pulling pleasure out of you. His tongue flicked over your clit, a maddening pattern, and when his lips closed, he sucked hard. It was so strong, so unreal, and you shook as you came again. 

“Ah, there it is…That’s so good, sweetheart,” Jake soothed, and you weren’t sure if he was talking to you or your pussy, and you certainly didn’t know which was hotter. 

He continued to stroke inside of you, his thick fingers pulling you through your orgasm, keeping you grounded, keeping your pleasure coming. 

You weren’t cold anymore. 

In fact, you were burning up, and Jake didn’t seem like he wanted to stop. The moment he felt coherency return to your posture, he dove back in. You genuinely didn’t think you could stand another orgasm from his mouth, and you let go of his hair – he wasn’t listening to you anyways – and flipped back the comforter. 

God damn, he was so hot. 

He looked up from between your thighs, the lower half of his face smeared with your arousal, and he fucking licked his lips, before smiling up at you. His hair was in complete disarray, and you could tell his whole upper body was flushed from overheating, and he looked so smug, so proud, and he had every right to be. 

“C’mere,” you asked, and it was enough. 

Grinning, Jake crawled up the bed, caging you with his arms again. 

He hesitated, unsure what you were okay with, but you kissed him hungrily. You could taste yourself on his lips, on his tongue, and you felt a sort of possessive pride that it’d chased away the cloying sweetness of his chapstick. 

Right now, Jake tasted like yours, and you were obsessed. 

When he realized he could, Jake returned the kiss with enthusiasm, his tongue sweeping into your mouth. 

Your hands smoothed over his back, curling in the hem of his tank and pulling it over his shoulders. Jake wouldn’t separate from your lips to let you pull it over his head and you giggled as he kissed you through it, like an infinity scarf. You felt up his back, hands delighting in the contours of muscles that you’d only admired from a distance, before you caught yourself. 

He was so strong. 

Warm and toned and big, intoxicating to think of him over you. Finally, he ducked his head to chuck off the shirt, and the motion lowered his hips to yours. You both groaned at the brush of his cock between your thighs, and then Jake was kissing you with fresh urgency. You hadn’t seen him yet, though he’d had his face in your pussy, and you reached between the two of you. 

You felt him over his boxers, and Jake broke off the kiss at your touch, his head dropping to your shoulder. It was like he couldn’t contain himself, and his hips pushed into your touch. You explored the shape of him through the thin cotton, your own hips rocking into him on instinct. 

Fuck, he felt big. 

You felt a small bit of wetness near the fat head of him, and you moaned as your thumb rolled over the leaking precum, rubbing his sensitive head. 

“I have a – shit,” Jake broke off, his hips rutting into your touch, and your head fell back. “I have a condom in my wallet.”

“Of course you do,” you teased, and it would’ve been more effective if you didn’t sound so needy about it. 

You turned your head to press a kiss to his cheek, then scooted out of the bed. 

The room felt freezing outside of the bed, but it was refreshing, as you darted over to his backpack. You found his wallet, and the condom inside it, and when you got back to the bed, Jake had only moved to push himself up. He was kneeling in the middle of the bed, and he shifted as he pulled off his boxers. 

“Holy shit, Seresin,” you whispered, not even caring that your voice sounded reverent. 

His cock was beautiful, thick between his thighs, bouncing parallel to the bed. Jake gripped the base of it loosely, like he had to do something while he watched you watching him, and you crawled back to the bed, still staring, kneeling so your knees almost touched his. 

“Can I?” you asked, holding up the condom. “Please, sweetheart,” Jake said, his voice so gruff and gorgeous. You licked your lips and ripped the foil, but hesitated before you pulled it out. 

“I’m clean,” you told him, sitting back on your thighs. “Um, we should still use this, but I just wanted you to know.”

Jake caught your chin between  his thumb and forefinger, tilting your head up to him. He kissed you quickly, short and sweet, and there was something unexpected in his eyes when he pulled back. 

“Me too, sugar,” he said, his voice deep. “Thank you.”

You couldn't be sure what he was thanking you for, but you felt like you should be thanking him. For making sure you felt good, for thinking of a condom, for making you feel so cared for. So you tilted your head, reached between you to where he was loosely fisting himself, and replaced his hand with yours. 

You pulled your hand loosely over him, obsessed with the warm feel of him, how thick he was in your hand, how heavy. Jake’s hands hovered like he wasn’t sure where you put them, and they settled on your upper arms, like he needed you to keep his balance. 

It didn’t stop you from leaning down and guiding his tip towards your mouth. 

Jake groaned, a beautiful, strangled sound, and it was lost to you when you first tasted him. 

This wasn’t the proper angle for a proper blow job, and you wanted to feel him, but you were curious, and your tongue lapped at him. His skin was scalding hot, and a pearl of precum beaded at the end of his cock, like an invitation. You licked it into your mouth, moaning at the salty, rich taste of him. 

Jake’s hand fell to the back of your head, not pushing, but like he needed to steady himself. You licked over him, acquainting yourself with him, learning the veins and sensitive spots, knowing you’d want to come back to them later. Too soon, Jake’s hand tightened in your hair. 

You looked up at him, hoping he’d like the picture of you from this angle. His jaw clenched and his eyes fluttered shut, if that was any indication. 

“Need to be inside you,” he ground out, and opened his eyes. “That mouth is so sweet, honey, gonna make this be over too soon. I want to feel that pussy.”

God, you wanted that too. 

You pushed yourself back up, pulled the condom out, and rolled it over his thick length. His thighs were shaking, you noticed, and it filled you with something like tenderness. That he’d get you there twice, then let you play with him, then say “please”, like fucking you was a privilege. 

When your hand reached the base of his dick, condom secured, he surged forward to kiss you. You swayed on the bed, kneeling in the middle of it, his hands cupping your face, yours on his waist. Both pulling, both needing to be closer, and when Jake lowered you back down, you followed his prompting eagerly. 

He settled you back against the pillows, back how you’d been when he’d driven you to the stars with his tongue, but this time his handsome face was right over you. When he settled over you, you closed your eyes against the intensity of the moment. You were both fully naked, and it felt so heavenly to have so much of his skin pressed against yours. He was warm, strong, all around you, and you needed him in you too. 

You spread your legs, letting him rest deeper between your thighs, and whimpering when his hot cock brushed against your stomach, then down. 

“Don’t know how slow I can take this,” Jake said, like he expected you to have a problem with that. 

“I want to feel you,” you told him, honestly. “Please.”

Jake kissed you again, pulling back to press his forehead to yours as he guided his dick between your thighs. 

You’d had two orgasms. 

You’d had his fingers and his tongue loosen you, you were plenty lubricated, but when Jake’s cock pressed against your entrance, you realized it hadn’t been enough. 

“Holy shit, Jake,” you gasped, as his fat head pressed against your pussy, waiting for resistance to melt. 

“Relax, baby,” he whispered hoarsely, “you can do it…You’re doing so good, just a little bit of give, come on…”

You whimpered at the new endearment, but there was no way. You felt needy, cloying. You could fit him, you knew it, but it felt—there.

He eased in, just a breath, and you felt like sobbing. It was so good, so overwhelming, so fucking tight, and you needed the rest of him. 

“Jesus, honey, you’re so tight,” Jake said, he sounded choked, and you loved it. 

“More,” you whimpered. “Please, Jake, want to feel you…you’re so big, I need more, please, please.”

“Honey, you can’t say things like that–” Jake gritted, your words driving his hips forward. 

You could tell he was trying to go slow, but the feeling of him forcing his cock into you had your legs shaking. You wanted it, needed it, and if begging was the way to get it, begging you could do. 

“Want to feel your thick cock, Jake,” you whispered, and he shivered. He was bracing himself against the headboard, and you could feel his arms shaking as he fought to keep from driving into you. “You feel so good, need to feel you so deep…want to come on your cock, please, Jake…come on and fuck me.”

He groaned like he was in pain, as he pressed deeper into you. 

He was trying to go slow, trying to be gentle, but you wanted to be mindless, you wanted your whole being centered around the deep push of his cock. You wiggled your hips, and sighed as he sunk deeper.  

“Thank you,” you breathed, and his hips punched forward again. 

“Jesus, sweetheart,” he muttered, and you would’ve laughed, but you were too overwhelmed. 

This was what you wanted, this was what you knew he could give you. Your hands dropped from his shoulders to your breasts, squeezing and massaging your breasts as he sank into you. You turned your head to look up at him, and found him staring, slack jawed, down at you in awe. 

“You make me feel so good,” you coaxed him. “Please, Jake…fuck me.”

Jake growled, a sound that came from deep in his chest, and his hand fell between you to brush over your clit. 

You jolted at his touch, your hips opening impossibly wider, and a hotter, stronger arousal racing through you than the steady, heavy press of him. Your hips bucked up, and you tweaked your nipples, working yourself up onto his cock rather than pressing him into you. It took a couple more burning minutes, and you were both coated in sweat by the time he was seated in you. 

“Baby…” Jake breathed, his voice a dream and you had to resist the urge to purr. He was so warm, all around you, inside you, it felt like he was grounding you. 

Then he moved.

His first pump had your back arching, your knees jolting up, your eyes flying open. Fuck, how did he reach that part of you, how was there room, how were you–

Jake laughed, a deep, dark sound. 

“That's what you wanted, sweetheart?” he asked, and he moved again. You cried out, overwhelmed, perfect.

“This what you were begging for?” Jake grunted, between strokes, “This what you were asking so prettily for, and now you have me, and what’s that, baby, can’t find your words? What’s wrong?”

Nothing was wrong, not a damn thing, but you couldn’t summon the wherewithal to tell him. All you felt was pleasure, pounding and sweeping, full and as good as eternal. 

“This pussy is so fucking tight, sweetheart,” Jake swore, his head lowering to kiss down your neck. He sucked at the skin there savagely, needing a distraction, and you clenched around him, when his lips closed over your pulse point. “Pulling me in, so tight and warm. You look so good around my cock, honey, you wouldn’t believe… Like a dream, like a fucking wet dream, but you’re here, stretched around me, taking me so good…”

You moaned as he found a rhythm.

The headboard was banging against the wall with the strength of his thrusts, and he pounded into you. There was so much he hadn’t said, so much he couldn’t say, but he pushed it into your body, swore it to you. He soothed it over your clit with his thumb, he promised it with his thick, heavy cock inside of you, and you felt yourself falling into it. 

“Please, Jake,” you managed, begging again. You couldn’t breathe, couldn’t do anything other than take the harsh fucking he was giving you, and craving it, needing it. 

“What’d’ya need, honey,” Jake groaned. “You have me here, so fucking deep, never felt this good, this right—what do you need, baby, tell me, whatever you need.”

Had the room been dark? Surely it’d always been bright light, sparking, blinding. 

Pleasure was rolling over you, suffocating, live-giving and you shook your head, moaning with every thrust of Jake’s hips. The only words you could manage were his name, and please, and it seemed to spur Jake on further. His thumb pressed hard into your clit as his hips sped up, and you felt the wave inside you cresting. 

“You’re close, honey, I can feel it, can feel how hard this cunt wants to come. Are you gonna do it, baby? Milk this cock, make it even tighter around me, want to feel that, need to feel your pussy twitching around me, sugar, please come…”

Your orgasm shattered over you, blinding and perfect. Your throat felt hoarse from your moans, or your breathlessness, but everything heightened. You felt like you were breathing with Jake, felt every hitch and gasp and shudder as he coaxed you through it. You felt like you were suspended in space, like the only thing there was was Jake’s arms around you and his cock within you and you needed, you needed, him to come. 

“Come in me, baby,” you whispered, your voice watery. “Need to feel you, want to feel how you’d fuck me to fill me, please, Jake, it’ll feel so good.”

“Fuck,” Jake shouted hoarsely, his hips thrusting harshly into you. “Oh, sweetheart, you feel too good, you’re so tight around me… I need to come, need to feel– fuck –”

You could feel his thighs shaking, his back tensing, and you turned your head to kiss him as he came. He moaned into your mouth, his whole body jerking as he emptied into the condom. You felt how strong he came, felt how thoroughly it worked through him, and it filled you with pride and satisfaction as he collapsed over you. 

You knew he meant to push himself to your side, but you didn’t let him go. 

You were just as boneless. 

You both lay there, a sticky, sweaty, mess, panting. It was like a dream, a daydream crossed with a fantasy. You were warm, comforted, sated, and the room was still cheap, the motel was still sketchy, but you were suddenly quite alright with this start to the year.  

//

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[embodyingchaos]

my barbie review

(obvious spoilers ahead)

okay so, i watched the barbie movie on the 22nd, and i must say, it exceeded my expectations and i was very happy with it.

the movie was quite political and i found it the most perfect opportunity to get political. the way the movie was done was that there were two worlds, barbie land, where all the barbies and kens reside, and the real world, where we all are.

i believe i should tackle each and every one of the movie aspects one by one in different topics.

let's start with barbie land. barbie land is a place where all the dolls of the barbie franchise live. you've got midge, allan, skipper, multiple different kens and multiple different barbies. in barbie land, it seems that the gender roles had switched. women took the higher-ranking jobs, like president, doctor, etc. while the men just had beach offs and basically did nothing, they were inferior. this was interesting since in the barbie franchise, ken was made just as barbie's boyfriend, that's all he was meant to be. he was at her every beck and call, he was the perfect boyfriend.

in the movie, ken(ryan gosling) was just barbie's friend. they didn't make them a couple, which i liked, they were just really good friends. however, ken wanted to be more. ken wanted to be acknowledged by barbie, included and respected. the kens in the movie weren't friendly with each other, they were all competitive and wanted to be better than the other. the kens were very dependent on their barbies and they believed that their whole purpose was just to get barbie to be their girlfriend. they basically believed that they were just barbie's boyfriend, nothing else.

barbie(margot robbie) was stereotypical barbie. the perfect, blue-eyed blondie that everyone thinks of right off the bat when someone mentions the name barbie. the thing is, she didn't do anything either. she mostly just woke up perfect, spent her day driving around and greeting other barbies, spends time at the beach and then has a dance party every night. it was the same thing every day. oh and "every night is girl's night." said barbie, ignorantly.

the way the barbies treated the kens were somewhat similar to how the men treated women; like they were secondary to everything. even though the gender roles are switched, the barbies were still women and the kens were still men. the way that the barbies ruled weren't discriminatory, they didn't sexualise the kens in any way, but when the kens ruled over, they brainwashed the barbies into believing that they their only roles were to do nothing and just serve their own kens. they ruled by making weird decisions like horses (you will only understand what i mean if you watch the movie, trust me).

however, i believed the only reason they had ruled this way was because when barbie and ken had come into the real world, ken was influenced by the men there. that's the reason he brought misogyny back into barbie land.(though when ken said "every night is boy's night." to barbie as a backfire, i was really happy LMAO)

all in all, all ken wanted was barbie's respect, her acknowledgement. he even said he lost interest in the patriarchy when he realised that horses weren't really a big thing in it. (he just wants a horse)

what i didn't like about what a few of the commentators and reviews said was that the movie was mostly focused on women. i believe that it wasn't. they talked about men's issues too. when ken said he wasn't suppose to cry, it made him weak but barbie told him it's okay to cry. barbie apologised to him for making him feel unseen and unheard, like his existence all depended on her. he got independency from this movie, he got closure. he is more than just barbie's boyfriend/love interest.

another thing that my friend had pointed out was that the way that the barbies ruled was similar to how the management in mattel(barbie's toy company) is. the ceo, cfo, etc. in mattel were all men. they believed that feminism, was women > men, when feminism is women = men. which is why the barbies didn't give the men any actual job, they just got lifeguard at the beach or surfer or anything beach related honestly.

when barbie went into the real world, she realised that women power wasn't as big as it was in her world. she realised that women weren't working in every high-ranking job like in her world and that they got constantly harassed and it somewhat shined a light on the whole situation she was in once she got back to barbie land. she probably realised that things were still one sided in barbie land, and they should strive to make both kens and barbies equal.

anyways, my favourite character was definitely allan. ally to the barbies, ally to the kens. after all, there is only one allan.

[frecklystars]

Something I think about a lot is Ken's emotions. Barbie experiencing sadness, crying, anxiety and fear are a huge deal in Barbieland. It's cause for concern and reason for her to go to the human world. Mattel doesn't want it either.

but Ken doesn't seem shocked to cry. He has plenty of negative emotions and it doesn't seem like it's a new experience for him. Him breaking down in tears can't be new for him if he reacts the way he does.

I wonder how long he's been like that.

Yes, absolutely. I've been meaning to talk about this, so thank you for bringing this up. I've thought about this myself for a couple of weeks now and I specifically want to bring up the very first time we ever see Ken on screen.

We see Ken cry twice in the movie, and he isn't shocked with himself at all the first time, but Barbie was surprised when she first cried because she wasn't used to experiencing an emotion that overwhelmed her to the point of tears.

Before Gloria projected onto her doll, Barbie had never been sad before. None of the Barbies have (except maybe Weird Barbie? I would be, if I was looked down on and separated from everyone else in the world because of an appearance I couldn't control). Barbie doesn't get sad, Barbie doesn't get embarrassed, Barbie doesn't get anxious or self conscious.

But Ken is plenty sad. Ken is plenty anxious. The first moment he's on screen, we see him on the beach, and he isn't happy. Screencaps won't do it justice, so here's a couple quick gifs I made...

He isn't smiling. This is BarbieLand, it's supposed to be so perfect, isn't it? But Ken's first appearance on screen already sets the tone of him as a character, as a potential antagonist (a word I use gently for his case). When we first see him... he's kind of bouncing on his heels a little, shifting his weight, eyes darting back and forth, looking for his girl. "Barbie has a great day every day, but Ken only has a good day if Barbie looks at him". Ken is already feeling anxious when we see him. You can already tell that he's going to unravel throughout the movie... that he could fall prey easily to anything that gives him a sense of power and control when he clearly lacks it here. Not power to control the world like most antagonists, but power over himself, power to control his own insecurities.

Moments later, Ken is afraid when he looks at those waves. A Lifeguard/Surfer Barbie wouldn't be afraid; she's Barbie, she can do anything. But he's Just Ken™. He's nervous. He's self conscious, everyone looking at him, the other Kens judging him. Barbie possibly judging him depending on how this goes ("Hey, Barbie. How much of that did you see?") Everything depends on Barbie. All of his emotions depend on Barbie. He genuinely, wholeheartedly, does not know how to Be A Person without Barbie. Anxiety, nervousness, these feelings aren't new. They are deeply rooted within him from the moment we see him. Barbies don't feel this way, but Ken sure does. Every day.

He experiences frustration when Simu's Ken does a flip in front of his Barbie. Jealousy, feeling like his own image is threatened... he feels like everything he does isn't good enough, whether it's for Barbie or for the other Kens.

The Kens constantly being at each other's throats, trying to show off around each other... Ken making a "double bet" with Ken, telling Barbie "you can't make me look uncool in front of Ken" -- he's already hyperaware about how other Kens may perceive him. He thinks Ken is cool. He wants to be cool to Ken, too. That alone shows that he lacks self confidence, how uncomfortable he is in his own skin. Er, plastic?

He's scared when Barbie is preparing to go to the real world. He feels left out when Barbie says "I wish someone could come with me" but she doesn't ask him, her boyfriend. He's twisting his glass anxiously, he's got that Ryan Gosling Brooding Stare™.

His lines in I'm Just Ken "Doesn't seem to matter what I do, I'm always number two", and "I have feelings that I can't explain, driving me insane" reveal up front that he's already experiencing these emotions that weigh on him heavily every single day. Ken has always felt this way, long before the movie's events.

I think it would be safe to assume that Ken has cried before this movie's events. It might be hinted a little, when he says "I'm a liberated man, I know crying is not weak". Though it could be possible that his first time crying ever was the scene where he's throwing Barbie's clothes out of her house and yelling, then sliding down to the floor. That could have been his first and we don't get to see an on-screen reaction to it, then the second time we see him crying he's already familiar with it. Or, he might have been too broken up to really care that there was water suddenly coming out of his eyes.

But I think everyone in BarbieLand already knows what crying is, since baby dolls have cried (babysitter Skipper crying while holding crying babies is an example they showed in the credits) so it's not so much that Barbie was surprised to feel tears coming from her eyes, so much as she was surprised that she was overwhelmed enough to feel something so bittersweet, so strong. "That felt... achy, but... good." So even if that was Ken's first time crying ever in his entire life, I still don't think he'd be surprised, because he's felt so many negative emotions on a daily basis, crying wouldn't be a shock when he's already feeling so broken and so frustrated with himself.

I also want to point out that even when he's crying, he is self conscious. Running and hiding his face, shouting don't look at me. Even Barbie wasn't self conscious when she cried in public at the park, when she cried in front of Ken and everyone else, when she cried in front of Gloria. Both times Ken cried, he would sort of curl in upon himself, face cast to the floor so no one could see him, or he'd be face down on the bed and then hiding his face in his hands.

You bring up a good point, how long has he been like that? How many times has he spiraled by himself? How much anxiety did he face on a daily basis without even being really aware of how normal it was for him?

[manonreviews]

barbie (2023)

"We mothers stand still so our daughters can look back to see how far they have come."

Barbie is not just a movie about the famous dolls. On a random fabulous day in Barbieland, Barbie (Margot Robbie) starts having dark thoughts, gets cellulite and can't tiptoe anymore. On the advice of Weird Barbie, she embarks on a journey to the Real World, with Ken (Ryan Gosling) alongside her. But as soon as they arrive in Los Angeles on their roller blades, they are shocked to see that life isn't as sweet as they thought... Both of them try to find new versions of themselves, for better or worst...

I have been waiting for this movie ever since the first pic of Barbie and Ken rollerblading got out. Though I have never been a fan of the original dolls, this movie felt like a must see to me.

And oh was I right. It was everything I expected and more. What starts as a beautifully decorated movie, with pretty clothes and pretty people, ends with such a heart wrenching finale. I never thought that going in the theater dressed in pink and happy to finally see this movie would leave me going home feeling so proud of being a woman and a human. The whole stance on feminism and womanhood was so well brought-on, in a way that made me feel like us women were finally seen and appreciated. America Ferrera's speech about what it is like to be a woman was amazing and so well delivered. What touched me the most was the way Barbie, who's the "representation" of what a woman "should" look like, felt so useless and not enough. But at the same time, Barbie is inspiring to little girls : you can be anything you want ! I loved that.

Without spoiling, Ken's storyline made me laugh way more than I expected. Ryan Gosling was outstanding and gave out a fabulous interpretation. Margot Robbie was also excellent in her role, and I liked America Ferrera very much.

The whole set, coupled with an amazing soundtrack, made the movie feel eerie. I know I will watch it whenever I feel a little down, cause it felt that good. And it made me feel proud to be a woman. Thank you Greta Gerwig!

directed by : Greta Gerwig release year : 2023 my rating :  ★★★★★ ♥

[biggestthighestgeminiest]

Here are my combined thoughts about Barbie (2023) as I saw it on the 18th and have had more time to think abt it.

Some good, some bad - overall I very much enjoyed it, laughed my ass off, cried quite a bit, was enthralled by the set and costume design, but left feeling like some things were off and perhaps not accomplished in the best way. This will all be delivered in bullet points in a very chaotic and random way and is NOT ordered in importance omg. Anyways i love media analysis and I will probably not explain this in the best way but HERE WE GO

the casting was fantastic, everyone read the assignment and lived their campiest life, margot robbie was phenomenal and ryan gosling absolutely killed me with laughter, glorious glorious

set design, costume, props,, perfection when it comes to bringing the mattel products to life. bangin'

i had that stupid fucking dog that eats and shits. i lost my mind when he came on hsdgkhakh

the message of barbie being representative of all little girls is still very lost on me. the idea brought up when barbie speaks to the teens, where they tell her that she gave them unrealistic body standards- well this never really gets resolved at all. Yes there was a diverse range of Barbies but they were all still beautiful in a conventional way that adheres to western beauty ideals. every barbie has perfect hair and skin and clothes even by the end of the movie. and yes i guess barbie is supposed to be this "above everything else" sort of divine feminine beauty but is still not representative of most young girls. as hilarious as the line narrator's line about margot robbie is, it sort of knows itself, that it is showing us the most perfect looking women, but doesn't address it at all beyond a simple joke. honestly what will mattel do beyond this? i imagine people will be more than happy with this movie so they won't have to make any big changes. i mean their "curvy" fashionista isn't close to being fat, and i don't believe they will ever make a barbie that isn't conventionally beautiful... so this movie just sort of gets to say it's about accepting yourself without actual real-life substance if that makes sense? it reminds me of that cartoon of all those diverse yet conventionally attractive models, with diverse people who don't fit those standards standing outside that box looking angrily. what's the point of the film at the end of the day when not addressing all those people left out of the conversation? also made me annoyed that cellulite was still the big thing that barbie was concerned about, like really?? it's a bad example as people are coming to embrace cellulite and it's also relatively easy to hide, i don't think they would have margot robbie have like, idk, dark under eye circles or a double chin,, idk someone say this better than me but the cellulite thing annoyed me (as someone who has loads of it!!)

the plot was BONKERS and i for one don't really care about plot holes or cartoon logic. there were some things that made me overthink about barbie lore and then i thought to myself that it doesn't really matter. the campiness of it is more important. im sure it will deter some people but again i dont mind it being silly in that way as long as it delivers on its messages and themes, which it does to a certain extent

absolutely lost it at the you are kenough shirt, ljadhkglkhd

as i said in a previous post i predicted that it was going to be the mom who was paired with barbie. i loved the idea sm and it was very heartwarming

i CRIED when barbie first sat down and watched the humans around her living their life, she was so overwhelmed by so many emotions and it was such a simple moment of show-dont-tell and man did i weep :))

i LOVED the ken bits and i did feel as though there was a bit too much ken. especially at the end. but at the same time i loved the dance sequence. its hard loving it so much yet wanting it not to have been to prevalent. i felt like it took away from the barbies a bit which goes against the whole point of the movie????

um the barbie's plans of distracting the kens was... i guess reminiscent of all these spy or superhero movies where women use their beguiling nature against men to get the upper hand? like i am woman so i will flirt with man to distract while my team escapes and hooho it works :)) it was slightly different and not overly sexy or about flirting but it still had the same undertone. like really? the best way to get the other barbies out was to continue to conform to patriarchal standards and pump the ken's egos? surely there's a better way? yes the kens are idiots and turning them against each other works but it still felt a bit icky. i guess i just find this trope annoying being like... ok i am being taken advantage of men so i will USE the thing they oppress me for against them,, idk surely surely there's another way.

also America's character's plan of kidnapping the barbies and ... using very true and very valuable feminist lines to snap them out of it felt... weird? like what she was saying was 100% true but taking them out of context and almost using them as one liners made them feel less serious???? like making women "wake up" by just telling them about how the patriarchy takes advantage of them is just... idk. like in real life women who are indoctrinated and truly believe misogynistic things won't just wake up by being told such a line. and i know the barbies are brainwashed to forget their powerful feminist backgrounds so it's not entirely comparable to the women i just mentioned but... idk it felt disingenuous. i did laugh my ass off at the guitar scene but it still had that ickiness attached like..

i would watch this movie again, no doubt about it and i will definitely pick up on new things and easter eggs etc

mattel's board did make me laugh, perfectly casted and performed but again- mattel has its name on this. they know what they are doing. they know we will love this movie and not demand any change. it will still be full of men controlling the output of production. it will still put out products that don't reflect all young people's desires. it will still make products that uphold current societal norms. so having these buffoons in the board meeting just gets soured a bit when knowing these people will still be in power in real life....

the ruth bit made me cry and no i do not care that her ghost is just around. i loved it

the marketing team knows exactly what they are doing. the huge push of promotion made me gobble up all their interviews and im sure people will be buying all the barbie products. i am yet another victim of capitalism and i will thank them for it when i inevitably buy their you are kenough sweater

again i loved this movie despite all the bad things abt it. i love being critical of the wider impact of this movie while still enoying it as a piece of media and entertainment. i needed this movie and fuck it i want to go to barbieland so bad. i know i shouldnt. i love ken and think about ken more than i do barbie which is fucked up but the movie also played into it in a way,, as described before. i mean even ryan gosling being so iconic in all the interviews is adding into this lol. how many people are posting videos of him vs videos of the actresses i wonder.

also cockring ken. BUT HE WASNT WEARING THE COCKRING SO WHATS THE POINT EVEN???

the narrator was an interesting choice, personally wasn't a huge fan of it but it did somewhat fit with the rest of the cinematic language of the story so i can't say much about it

mattel knows exactly what its doing with putting its name on this movie. i think greta did a great job despite the constraints that mattel probably put on her,, it's hard to tell if the flaws of the movie come from the corporation's infuence or from the writer and director's creative decisions, most likely it's a combo of both. again i believe that the actors and designers and production team did a fantastic job with what they had, they committed to the bit. i would have loved for the movie to have been better, but it is still a great film in my book. as said before i would watch it again and would still enjoy it despite the flaws. the himbo part of my brain can shake hands with the media literacy one and emerge with an overall positive experience, yet PLEASE do not think this is the ultimate feminist movie, it is a step in the right direction, it could have been better, and i understand if you don't like it at all. but also i dont think it would be right to blindingly love it and call it perfect bc it's not.

[cerisia76]

💅, 💖, 💔 and 🔮 for the Barbie ask game

Let's go!

💅Unpopular Barbie movie opinion: I have quite a lot to be honest but I will go on and say The Barbie movie 2023 was absolutely disrespectful of Barbie movies fans. It's the kind of movie that could have been done with any doll brand and chose to completely ignore Barbie and Ken's character, making their Ken an insult to the Ken we've seen on screen during our whole childhood. The real Ken is a kind-hearted person, who lives to be with Barbie yes, but who also has his own personality and dreams and who is happy to be a trophy-husband. The writers of this movie definitly never watched a Barbie movie or Barbie Life in the Dreamhouse. Also the fans of this movie become crazy when I say this point. Their favourite argument is "But Ken isn't real, don't talk about him as if he was alive or your lover" just because I said "Ryan Gosling's Ken isn't the Ken I know and love". I mean, this movie was the biggest disappointment I had in 2023. Also Princess and the Pauper is overrated (doesn't mean it's bad either don't worry it's amazing) and I don't get why it's considered the best Barbie movie. Top 5 or top 3? Easily but the best and if you disagree you're wrong or refusing to see the truth? Nah sorry.

💖 I'm gonna give three. My favourite character of all times, my favourite character played by Barbie and my favourite male character. If you've been following me for a long time you probably already know these three characters. Let's start with my guy:

Dominick is basically the reason why i always have too high standards. He's the guy who just wanted to find a girl who'd love him for his personality rather than his position and who was ready to do everything he could for it to happen. He's the guy who felt in love with a girl and when he realized she wasn't the person he thought she was, still took the time to discover by himself if she was that girl he had felt in love with. When he realized it, he proposed and when she refused because she wanted to go live her dream, he let her go without hesitation and was ready to wait his whole life for her to return without any certitude that she'd come back. All of this because her happiness was more important for him than his own. This is pure love and that's why I love him so much.

My favourite Barbie character is also an easy bet:

Corinne is the person I'd like to be. The nice girl who always tries her best and who's got enough self-esteem to never let anyone tell her what she can and can't do. She's a badass, she's funny, she's iconic and she's sweet. She is an amazing person but she's also really human because she has flaws. She's stubborn and goes into adventure and danger without thinking twice, never having a plan B, she's terribly clumsy sometimes and that makes her a full character because we can see how these flaws impact her in the movie.

And no surprise again, my favourite Barbie character has always been and will always be:

Alexa from Barbie and the Diamond Castle. She's the character i always related to the most. She's a good person who wants to do what's good but she's also realistic and doesn't want to die or to put herself and the people she loves in danger. She follows her emotions, sometimes too much and it can cause her trouble but at the same time it's her biggest quality. She's a beautiful soul who is put in a situation where she can't be the hero because she cares too much about her life and we needed her in the movie. Liana's "I'm always doing the right thing and being the perfect protagonist" attitude would have made the movie insufferable if it hadn't been opposed to Alexa's "I know you want to do the right thing and I want to do it too but not if it means losing my life" attitude. Like they were necessary to each other but Alexa stands out because she's the more realistic one. She's scared to be left behind when she sees her bestfriend girlfriend starting to put another girl as her priority. Is it stupid jealousy? Yes but it's due to insecurity and a terribly precure situation where you have to remember her house got burned because of this other woman. A woman she also really cares about and like but can't help feeling jealous of. Alexa is that character who's so much more than what it seems and I love her with all my heart.

💔: Okay I know some people will find it strange considering Chelsea the lost birthday exists but it's Barbie Princess Power. The reason is easy: I never watched Chelsea the lost birthday and don't plan to. While I had to suffer the watch of Barbie Princess Power three times in my life because my youngest brother kinda liked it. I just find it so bland, annoying, badly colored and just overall uninteresting that I can't stand it. And yes I think there are other movies that are worse but at least I can watch them without being so annoyed and irritated by my watching. Like really I want to jump out of the window when I watch this horrifying piece of fluo colors. Don't worry I'm watching Barbie movies on the ground floor.

🔮: That's a hard one to be honest... But I would really like to see an adaptation of Snow White and Rose Red. Like this fairytale was one of those I was reading again and again in my childhood. I would love to see Barbie play Snow White and Barbie (Brooklyn) or Teresa play Rose Red. They don't have to be sisters but I'd like the story to follow the same path with the bear being a prince, Snow White falling in love with him and marrying him but at the same time I want to see Rose Red meet the prince's cousin, a girl, and progressively fall in love with her. I would like the dwarf being really mean and actually causing trouble and the girls seeing it, still try to help him because they are nice but then, realize not everyone deserves the kindness you give them. The bear/prince deserved it because in return he was nice, polite and a good person. The dwarf doesn't because he's mean, cruel and wouldn't have hesitated to kill the girls if it meant he would be safe. That would be a good call-back to the movies we've had in the 2000s but also include some themes we talk about more in today's world.

[scary-friend]

I’m back from Barbie!

I’m experiencing so many emotions! I absolutely loved it! It was so much more than the trailers and I would absolutely recommend it! I’m just so happy I can’t adequately express it in words. Just watch it for yourself and tell me what you think! 💕

Spoilers beyond this point.

Where do I even start with the love I have for this movie. It has so many iconic lines I don't think I can pick a favorite. Although...

"They're dream houses mother******." is pretty perfect.

I really appreciated the marketing. It comes across as this fun pink film, but it's so much more than that. It has a profound, emotional message about womanhood and growing up. Life is not always perfect, but that doesn't make it any less beautiful.

This movie made me feel so much from laughing to crying, it is just so fabulous in everything it does. I especially love how they made Barbie aroace, love that for her.

(I might jump around so forgive me)

I loved how the Ken fight just suddenly becomes a dance battle, and then an entire musical number.

Seeing Barbie slowly go from a doll to a flesh-out person was just incredible. Seeing her work through difficult emotions and find her way through life is something I feel like a lot of people can relate to. I especially loved Gloria's speech about being a woman. The theater clapped when she was done. She's absolutely right in her points, and I appreciated that.

I really appreciated how dedicated they were to keeping Barbie's world like a playland. With no one eating or drinking, the water is still plastic. It was just so fun to see all the set pieces. They were so well made.

I also liked that they didn't have Barbie and Ken end up together. They were only together because it's the societal norm, pretty girl + pretty boy = relationship. Then once they discover themselves they realize that they're more than that, and they don't have to be together. They can exist outside of one another and be their own person. Specifically Ken, but Barbie also realizes that she doesn't love Ken either. At least romanticly.

The humor of this movie was wonderful. I've never laughed so much in a movie. I just loved watching stereotypical Ken in every scene he was in, Ryan Gosling absolutely nailed his character.

When can I even say about Margot Robbie that hasn't been said already? She's beautiful, an outstanding actress, and she was just so fun to watch. I could really feel with her throughout the whole movie. I just loved her so much.

Also, Nicki Minaj and Ice Spice with Barbie World in the credits have been in my head since I left. I now have a new favorite song. I also have to talk about Choose your fighter by Ava Max, absolutely love. Dance the night by Dua Lipa, iconic.

That final line hit me like a truck. I was absolutely not expecting that, and honestly, I loved it. What a way to end the film. Absolutely killed it.

I honestly think I'll go see it again. I dressed up in pink and everything. Did my makeup and just felt so pretty. Now I'm all emotional over this movie and it's just lovely. I can't complain about anything. I'm just very moved at the moment.

Please tell me watch you loved in the comments. I'd love to hear it!

💕 I love Barbie! 💕

[madison-reviews]

Barbie Movie Review:

I thought I would make this my first post mainly because it was the most recent movie I watched. I loved this movie so so much, not only did it have A powerful message, it had MULTIPLE powerful messages which always makes a good movie, of course.

So the movie follows "Stereotypical Barbie" who has the perfect life. She wakes up with perfect hair, teeth, clothes - everything. But one day, she wakes up with bed hair, morning breath and wort of all - flat feet! (Before I go further with my opinion, this movie made me laugh so much as well as tear up - also there will be spoilers!)

Stereotypical Barbie eventually figures out there is a malfunction with her so she asks Weird Barbie for help to which Weird Barbie tells her that she needs to go to the real world because the girl who used to play with her is depressed.

So, before our Barbie malfunctions, there's Ken, and he loves Barbie because that's all Ken was made for - to love Barbie. Know, I want to elaborate on this thought further down the line but I loved that in Barbie land, it was women who ruled it and men were essentially objectified yet in the real world it was the opposite. Quick examples include: Ken only being happy when Barbie is in sight, Ken fighting with the other Kens because of inferiority complex, Ken being excluded from Barbies life because of things like "every night is girls night" and more. Do these sound familiar? Well if you're a woman in the real world, that's probably why. Women hating other women purely because of fear of being replaced by your partner and feeling inferior around someone we deem "perfect" is a common thing women of the real world experience and I love that it was flipped in Barbie Land and that when our Barbie got the shock she got in the real world and the reality check she got near the end of the movie realising how poorly she was treating Ken made me super happy. I loved that there was never really a double standard.

I loved that in the movie, we felt as though we were Barbie herself, experiencing the world for the first time, seeing the emotions. The pain, the happiness, the worry. All things we experience on a daily basis as humans but when we see them al together, we feel how Barbie did. Sad, happy, scared all at once. It made me feel like I was a human travelling earth for the first time haha.

There was also a scene where Barbie went to Mattel HQ and in an attempt to send her back, they put her in a plastic box - you know, the plastic box your Barbie comes in - and when she went in it, just before they tied her wrists to the back of the box, she experienced panic and so did I really and I'm not a doll nor have I ever been subjected to being put in a box but I still felt scared. I also felt really bad for all the Barbies in the shops after I saw the movie, haha. Weird thing was though, I didn't feel silly or stupid for feeling that way. I wonder why that was.

So Barbie and Ken go to the real world and while Barbie tries to figure out who the girl she is looking for is, Ken goes on a little adventure around town, and it's hilarious. I loved the patriarchy jokes and the way he thought it was only about horses and even by the end of the movie he still didn't really understand it. It was very funny, I love Ryan Gosling. Basically, Ken figures out that men run the real world and this is a shock to him because he's used to being the one not in control as he lives in Barbie Land - where women control that world. It was weird because see to be honest, I felt like Ken was the woman sometimes... Does that make sense? He was so accessorised and so meek and only lived for Barbie that he reminded me of a woman in the real world and it really opened my eyes into realising that men can feel that way too. At the end of the day, we're all human and controlling behaviour does not own a gender. Women can be as controlling as men and vice versa. Although Kens scenes made me laugh a lot, they also made me stop and think a lot.

After Barbie runs away from Mattel, (funny) she jumps into the car of the mother of the little girl who she thought was the girl who was depressed. Turns out, this little girl is actually very popular and a little rude at times and far from depressed... Her mother however, is very sweet, depressed, going through motherhood of a teenager and also a little bit childish who, funny enough, still owns a Barbie. Stereotypical Barbie, that is. There - in the car - after realising this is who she needs to "save" Barbie takes her and her daughter back to Barbie Land as a way to show them both that women aren't doomed essentially.

Little does Barbie know though, that Ken had already returned to Barbie Land and taken it over. He's made all the Barbies wear made outfits, deliver beers and become what the Kens used to be - servants, living solely for Ken and Ken alone. They literally only think of the Kens! But doesn't that sound awfully familiar? Well, you would be right. This is how Ken felt and was treated in the beginning of the movie and when he sees Barbie, he seems sad but his sadness turns into anger and pettiness it would seem. I mean, who wouldn't feel that way after being rejected but not rejected at the same time?

I loved when all the Kens started getting all petty and jealous because it was sort of funny but also subtly serious in a way. We also got the most amazing song in the whole soundtrack "I'm just Ken" sung by Ryan Gosling himself. Absolute masterpiece really.

There's a part when Barbie starts telling Ken it's the BARBIE Dreamhouse and that he shouldn't be there and Ken gets upset obviously and he tells her that "Every night is boys night" paralleling to what Barbie had told him in the beginning of the movie when Ken asked to stay over and Barbie said "Every night is girls night" leaving Ken to go home alone - if he even has a home that is.

Coming to the end of the movie, we get a really hard hitting speech from Barbies human (I forgot her name but it was America Ferrera's character) that was great really. I love it when movies don't pretend that all women love and respect each other. One quote I remember was when she said "Men hate women and women hate women. It's the one thing we can all agree on." and it just really hit home you know? Probably because it's true and although I can't remember the whole speech, I remember being truly moved by it, which is very rare for me personally!

After the Barbies hit the Kens where it hurts most (their egos) they regain power in the Kendom and rename it back to Barbie Land but when Ken figures it out he runs away crying and Barbie feels bad so they have a heart to heart and it was actually very sweet. It didn't feel like they were babying Ken but they weren't being rude with him either, I actually really liked the scene. It touched on the fact that Ken felt worthless without Barbie and how he felt like he could never just be "Ken" because it was always Barbie AND Ken, never just Ken but after a talk with Barbie and her officially rejecting him saying she's always just wanted to be his friend, he realises that he felt the same way this whole time, he just never felt like he COULD feel that way.

About 20 minutes before the movie ends, we officially meet the creator of the first ever Barbie Ruth Handler. (We do meet her earlier on when Barbie is on the run from Mattel but it's only for about 2 minutes) And it was the sweetest scene ever, seriously I was on the verge of tears when that Billie Eilish song came on and I'm not even a fan of her music. The clips and photos of mothers with their daughters was just so heart-warming and with the words "What was I made for?" in the background, it was just a sweet scene. Definitely a great mother-daughter movie. One quote that made me tear up was (don't quote me on it, I could be wrong) "Mothers stand still so they can look at how far their daughters have come" just a really good quote and when Barbie started crying and basically asked "Can I really be human?" and when Ruth replied "Oh honey, you never need to ask permission to be human" it felt very validating? I don't know.

Anyway that's about it, all in all personally, I thought the main message was that not only one gender can rule the world because of the fact that when men ruled the real world it was horrible for women and Barbie, but when Barbie Land was ruled by purely women, it was horrible for the Kens. I don't know if that was intentional or not but I hope it was, it was a very validating movie but in my opinion it wasn't very "in your face" because it wasn't ONLY about men being cruel, evil beings that shouldn't even exist.

To rate the movie out of 10, I would give it a 9/10. Only reason it isn't a 10/10 is probably because there was about 30 seconds when this tween age girl was trying to talk politics and it just felt really forced but it was literally 30 seconds or more so I don't really care. I loved the movie and I had a lot of laughs, tears and fun! I would for sure recommended it to anyone procrastinating on seeing it.

[magic-ace]

[Dolls, Barbie] The Short Yet Fabulous Life of Earring Magic Ken

Or, that time Mattel gave Ken a cock ring and created a legend.

This is my first time writing a post here, but this story has made me laugh for years now, so I'm excited to share it with all of you. I'll have my sources listed at the bottom of the post. If I get anything wrong or miss any crucial details, please let me know and I'll edit the post.

Anyway! Gather 'round for a tale of marketing, frosted tips, and kitsch.

# Who is Ken?

Ken, full name Kenneth Sean Carson, is a fictional character and fashion doll sold by Mattel. If you know who he is, you probably know him as "Barbie's boyfriend," and that's because that's exactly what he is. Barbie is *the* fashion doll, easily the most iconic doll in America and one of the most famous toys... ever. She's had hundreds of careers and thousands of iconic fashion looks, and has appeared in a wide variety of media, including a movie coming out July 2023 where she's played by Margot Robbie. Barbie is The Legend. Ken, while not quite as famous as she is, does have a lot of name recognition - at least, while he's standing next to Barbie.

While various toys and tie-in media has depicted their relationship in various ways (coworkers, serious committed couple, childhood besties, friends with a mutual crush they're both too shy to act on, sometimes they're even married), Ken is Barbie's primary love interest, male companion, and boytoy/trophy husband. (Okay, okay, to give the guy some credit, he's had 40ish careers since his introduction. Not quite as impressive as Barbie's resume, but then again, few things are.)

Ken debuted in 1961, two years after Barbie, both characters invented by Ruth Handler. (Fun fact: just as Barbie was named after Ruth's daughter Barbara "Barbie" Handler, Ken was named after her son. Feels a little weird to name love interests after a pair of siblings, but it is a cute tribute.) Ken dolls tend to be less detailed and complex than Barbie dolls. Ken dolls, especially in the early days, didn't always have bendable limbs or torsos, and in general there's less clothing options available for them. One fun fact is that while the first Kens had felt hair, after a couple years, he started having molded plastic hair, rather than the brushable synthetic hair Barbie had.

Barbie at her core is a feminine power fantasy, and Ken is very much part of that. If Barbie is meant to emulate who the little girl playing with her wants to be, Ken is meant to emulate that girl's ideal boyfriend. (Of course, not everyone who played with Barbie is a girl or wants a boyfriend - a young not-yet-realized queer kid, I thought Ken was boring as hell and never wanted one; I was perfectly happy to have my Barbies living in a vaguely gay girls-only castle going on adventures.) He's handsome in the blandest way possible, and always dressed to the nines, and if you buy a Barbie and Ken doll that are packaged together, or a set of clothes for both dolls, Ken's clothes will always match and complement Barbie's.

So, that's Ken. Handsome, well-liked, presumably rich, multitalented and with the world's most beautiful and accomplished woman as his adoring girlfriend. He's even going to be played by Ryan Gosling in the upcoming movie! Let's be real - Ken's got it made. Why would anyone want to shake things up?

# "Cooler"

Well, like I said before, Ken just isn't as impressive or #iconic as Barbie. He's not as sparkly or fun or memorable, and is often more of an accessory than a character. There's a reason the meme of the moment is "Barbie is everything. He's just Ken." That has been their dynamic for decades, and Ryan Gosling GETS it. Lots of kids ask for a new Barbie for Christmas, and can often point to one or three or seven specific Barbies they want - but how many ask for a Ken? Apparently, this showed up in the sales numbers, too.

So, in the early 1990s, Mattel sets out to find out what they can do to make Ken more popular - or if he should even stay at all. Yes, you read that right, Mattel was considering getting rid of Barbie's boyfriend altogether. So, what do you do when you want to find out what your demographic will buy? You ask them what they like! Working with a focus group of 5-year-old girls, Mattel asked them what they wanted, and what would make them like Ken more. Should Barbie dump Ken for someone more hip with the kids?

The girls responded with, no! They liked Ken! Barbie should definitely stay with Ken. Phew! The then-thirty year old romance was saved.

(This would not, however, be the last time Ken would be on the chopping block - anyone growing up in the early-to-mid 2000s like I did who was into Barbies likely remembers the tragic but ultimately temporary breakup between Barbie and Ken, during which Barbie dated an Australian surfer named Blaine. But that's a different story.)

But, the girls said, they did wish Ken was... cooler.

"Make it cooler" is quite possibly the least helpful bit of advice ever, right up there with "do what feels right" and "take that business opportunity from your high school friend." There's a reason there was a My Little Pony meme about this.

But, okay, the girls said they wanted cooler. Mattel could do that. They could totally do that. They knew what was cool.

Right?

# The Makeover

How exactly the Mattel execs collected their coolness data is unclear. This was pre-social media, so figuring out the hottest trends wasn't as simple as opening TikTok and scrolling until you have 4 new insecurities. Most sources I've looked at seems to agree that what *probably* happened is that Mattel looked at what little girls found cool - aka, singers on MTV, dressed in bright colors and funky jewelry - and also did some research to find out what the hot trends are. And where do you go to find the hot trends? Go to the hot clubs! It's worth noting that we can't be 100% sure, because Mattel hasn't ever talked about the process behind creating Earring Magic Ken. Actually, they don't like to talk about him much at all. Strange.

What we do know is that within two years of the focus group, Mattel had given Ken a makeover. You can check out Ken's look [here](https://www.nyhistory.org/blogs/earring-ken-proud-billy-new-york-historical-celebrates-pride-two-new-acquisitions), but I'll break down the basics.

First, he had platinum blonde highlights. And he was wearing a leather(?) purple vest over a mesh purple top in a look that I'd describe as "so tacky it circles back around into being kind of awesome." Like Tyler Durden's fur coat and bright orange pants. The key is confidence!

Per the name, Ken also has an earring in his left ear. Interestingly, Mattel *did* expect some pushback from this line, but they thought it'd be about the earring, which in hindsight is hilarious. But it does make sense from their perspective; in the early 90s, men wearing earrings wasn't exactly mainstream or accepted fashion. But, times were changing, Mattel reasoned. You see more and more guys wearing earrings nowadays, and Ken should keep up with the times. People might complain, but so what? Little girls would love it.

The most important detail to note for our story is Ken's necklace; a long chain with a big, silver ring on it. Now, Mattel will swear up and down that the ring is meant to match Barbie's accessories - he can even wear some of the charms from her bracelet on his necklace, how cute! And, to be fair, all the Barbies in the line wear rings like this, too, on their belts.

Mattel had *greatly* misunderstood those pretty necklaces that some guys were wearing out to the club. But they didn't know that yet. (As I stated in the Hobby Scuffles thread, there must've been at least one employee - probably several - who *did* know that and could make a couple predictions about how this was gonna go, but they couldn't say anything without explaining *why* they knew that. Or maybe they just thought, "Oh, this will be *hilarious*.")

Earring Magic Ken was released in 1993.

# Ken-sation!

Honestly, whoever set up that focus group with those little girls must've been spiking the football when Earring Magic Ken hit the shelves. Because the grand plan to make Ken cooler and sell more toys? Reader, it fucking *worked*.

Earring Magic Ken was not a standalone doll, but rather, a one in a collection of six. The "Earring Magic" collection featured Barbie and her friends in bold, bright colors, with their hair done up in big bouncy curls, with flashy, sparkly earrings. You can check out the other dolls [here](https://www.flickr.com/photos/20837663@N08/4671335912). (Wikipedia says it was six dolls, but for the life of me I cannot find a picture with all six dolls in it, so unless someone has one they'd like to drop in the comments, you'll have to settle for five.) Each doll comes with a pair of clip-on earrings for the owner to wear and match with their doll.

By all accounts, all the dolls in the line sold well, but none more so than Ken. I have to imagine they were pouring the champagne over at Mattel - the line was doing great, and for the first time ever, Ken was outselling Barbie. Hell, they couldn't keep that doll stocked!

Earring Magic Ken was the bestselling Ken doll of all time when he came out, pun intended. (Whether or not he still is is unknown.) He was inevitably the butt of some gay jokes; a man wearing an earring? Absurd! Frosted tips? Hilarious! A mesh top? Get out of here! In many ways, it was the same kind of jokes late night hosts would crack about male pop stars who dressed flamboyantly. Annoying to some, sure, definitely at least slightly homophobic, but ultimately, nothing Mattel didn't probably see coming. And, hey, kids clearly loved Ken's new look. They were raking in the cash, so what did they care what adults had to say?

And then one man, like the child who finally points out that the emperor is naked, was brave enough to stand alone with his head held high. And he said:

"That doll is wearing a fucking cock ring."

# People Notice the Cock Ring

I didn't know until I started research for this post that the "whistleblower" as it were in this whole rainbow debacle was Dan Savage. But now that I do know that, I am not even slightly surprised. Like of course it was him. For those of you who don't know who he is, Dan Savage is a relationship/sex advice columnist. He's openly gay and known for being very sardonic, very blunt, and, depending on who you ask, very funny or very obnoxious. Sometimes both. His column, Savage Love, has been going since 1991, and he also has a podcast by the same name. (He also started the It Gets Better Project, which is neat.) To give you an idea of his general vibe, his catchphrase is "dump the motherfucker already," aka DTMFA.

It really is no surprise to me that when Dan Savage sees "cock ring," he *says* "cock ring."

See, Ken's outfit wasn't just any old clubwear. It was *gay* clubwear. It was stuff that gay men were wearing to raves and nightclubs and parties.

And that necklace? Yeah, that circular "pendant" would be a cock ring. As u/ginganinja2507 put it in 4/10/23's Hobby Scuffles thread: *"yeah if it had been barbie finger sized it would've probably not raised any eyebrows but it is. not that size."*

Obviously, Dan was not literally the first person to notice this, but his article helped bring the conversation from "this doll looks kinda gay with his vest and his earring" to "no, y'all, this doll is literally wearing a gay sex toy. He's gay."

The irony that this doll with no genitalia was wearing a cock ring was lost on nobody.

I'll let Dan himself explain, in his article "Ken Comes Out." I linked to the article in my sources below if you want to read the whole thing.

>*When they’re not fashion statements, cock rings are worn around the base of your cock or your close personal friend’s cock if you don’t have one of your own. Slip one on when you’re soft; once you’re hard, it traps blood in the penis, increasing sensitivity and prolonging orgasm.*

>

>*Chrome cock rings like Ken’s were long worn by the leather crowd on the shoulders of their biker jackets (left for top, right for bottom). In the waning years of our long national nightmare (aka the Reagan-Bush years), younger gay-boy-activist types with brand-new leather jackets took to wearing cock rings on whichever side looked best or, to the horror of the leather crowd, on both sides. Tops? Bottoms? Versatile? Clueless? Who knew? Then dykes started wearing them—cocks or not, they didn’t want to miss out on any of the sex-positive accessorizing.*

>

>*Cock rings exploded (ouch!)—as vest zipper pulls, as key rings, as bracelets; rubber ones, leather ones, chain ones. But the thick chrome variety, the Classic Coke of cock rings, was and is most often worn as a pendant. Chrome cock ring necklaces became de rigueur rave wear. For about a year every gay boy at a rave was wearing at least one—these cock rings were often pressed into service later in the evening, to help totally tweaked ravers keep up what the X was pulling down.*

>

>*On closer inspection, Ken’s entire Earring Magic outfit turns out to be three-year-old rave wear. A purple faux-leather Gaultier vest, a straight-out-of-International Male purple mesh shirt, black jeans and shoes. It would seem Mattel’s crack Ken-redesign team spent a weekend in LA or New York dashing from rave to rave, taking notes and Polaroids.*

What I find especially funny about this is the fact that Ken wasn't just wearing gay clubwear, but *outdated* gay clubwear. I feel like Barbie would be more affronted by that than anything.

So, a lot of those astronomical sales turns out to have come from adults buying the doll not for a kid, but for themselves. This is nothing new; loads of adults collect fashion dolls, either because they find a specific doll really beautiful or interesting, or they consider it to be culturally significant, or it has a schtick or branding that aligns with another interest of theirs. In this case, a lot of the buyers were gay men, who found the doll hilarious and honestly, kind of iconic. (In a bit of anecdotal evidence, my mom, who's always had a lot of queer friends and remembers when this all went down, says she knew gay men who owned multiple "Cock Ring Kens." I assume some were given as gifts, but I also know people who would definitely have, like, four of these guys around just for the hell of it.)

It's worth noting that Ken, to quote Savage again, "always read kind of gay." I'm guessing it's a combination of the fact that Ken often wears soft, pastel colors (to compliment Barbie!), rides around in a pink sports car (he's a passenger princess!), and, well, look at that hair. I've always seen jokes about how Barbie is Ken's beard... or maybe they're each other's beards.

While some of this is pure "haha, man cares about appearance is gay! Children's characters being gay is funny!" coming from cishet people, I do know a lot of queer people (myself included) on social media who love Barbie and Ken, and consider them to be "ours," whether because Ken is a bit on the "meterosexual" side (to resurrect a term that died in 2008), or because Barbie is an ultra femme icon, or because of the campiness of the franchise, or because some of those direct-to-DVD Barbie movies are kind of sapphic (hello, Diamond Castle), or because the franchise was near and dear to us as children and we want to make it our own in adulthood. I think that's why Earring Magic Ken was such a hit; not just because of the inherent hilarity in Mattel unknowingly making Ken a gay club-goer, but because, in a batshit, accidental way fueled by capitalism, he *is* ours. I know I'd love to get my hands on one.

# The Aftermath

Obviously, once the alarm rang that Earring Magic Ken was getting the nickname Cock Ring Ken, and for good reason, Mattel issued an apology and the doll disappeared from shelves. Cowards!

EDIT: I originally said there was a recall, and many articles on this whole thing say this. However, as u/InevitableBohemian pointed out, it's hard if not impossible to pinpoint where that claim started, and no contemporary articles about a recall seem to be out there. It seems highly likely that the doll was simply discontinued and unsold dolls were pulled from shelves, but that the "recall" detail is an exaggeration.

They adamantly denied that they'd meant to put a cock ring on a Ken doll, because of course they did. To be clear, I do believe them - there's absolutely no way they would've let that go through on purpose. But it did give us this amazing quote from Lisa McKendall, who was working for Mattel's marketing department at the time.

>We’re not in the business of putting cock rings into the hands of little girls.

Incredible.

# The Legacy

Earring Magic Ken is still famous in the Barbie enthusiast community. It's one of the first stories you hear when you get into dolls as an adult collector/enthusiast, and these days, he's highly sought after. (As of this typing, a new Earring Magic Ken goes for $179 on ebay. A commentor on the lot said they have one, which they keep next to their Cher doll, which - amazing, incredible, no notes.) This is one of my favorite stories to tell to people who don't know much about dolls, so writing this up has been an absolute joy. I really hope this Ken gets a cameo or a reference in the movie, because it's such an iconic story and doll; it's just the right blend of camp, corporate cluelessness, funny, and audacious to be not just a memorable scandal, but one that's looked back on with fondness. (Seriously, it is so nice to talk about a drama where the worst outcome was some embarrassment.)

I think Dan Savage put it best:

> The little girls of our great nation wanted a hipper Ken, and Mattel gave them a hip Ken. A queer Ken.

He may have only been on shelves for six months, but Ken and his purple mesh shirt and his glorious, glorious cock ring will live on in our hearts forever. Amen.

# Sources

* My mom, when she could stop laughing.

* [Ken (doll)](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ken_(doll))

* [Earring Magic Ken](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Earring_Magic_Ken)

* [Barbie Media: Ken Timeline](http://www.barbiemedia.com/ken/timeline.html)

* [How Barbie's Boyfriend Ken Became an Accidental Gay Icon](https://money.howstuffworks.com/barbie-earring-magic-ken-gay-icon-1993.htm)

* [The True Story of Mattel Accidentally Releasing a Super Gay Ken Doll](https://www.intheknow.com/post/earring-magic-ken-gay/)

* [Ken Comes Out](https://chicagoreader.com/news-politics/ken-comes-out/)

* [Toys Will be Toys: The Stereotypes Unravel](https://www.nytimes.com/1993/02/11/garden/toys-will-be-toys-the-stereotypes-unravel.html)

* [Earring Magic Ken and “Out and Proud” Billy: New-York Historical Celebrates Pride with Two New Acquisitions](https://www.nyhistory.org/blogs/earring-ken-proud-billy-new-york-historical-celebrates-pride-two-new-acquisitions)

I do not know how to respond.

...Penis blast?

[valerie]

Twenty-Five Years Ago in Santa Monica

Twenty-five years ago I was in Santa Monica for a Hercules/Xena convention. The cast from Young Hercules was there. Ryan Gosling, Dean O'Gorman, and Chris Conrad were on stage on January 23rd and I was in line to ask a question for them but alas, it never happened. Chris did come off the stage to give a little girl in front of me a hug and we ended up shaking hands when he said hi to some of us in the line. Later, I met all the guys during the autograph line. I was weirdly silly and asked about Erik Thomson. I took pictures of each of them. You can see them at my report from that weekend here.

the very lovely Chris Conrad The next day, January 24th, Ryan and Dean were set to sign more autographs in the lobby of the venue, joined by Joel Tobeck. Chris wasn't available for a reason I can't remember. It was a bummer too because I had the other three sign the Young Hercules poster I had. I would end up getting everyone's signature on that poster, which I still have, except for Chris'. The missing autograph haunted me for decades. Then Chris sent me that vest jacket so my melancholy about not getting his signature has been eased a bit. After getting those signatures, my friends and I went back to our rooms to put away our posters and photos, then headed back to the venue. When we saw that the boys were taking pictures with the fans, we went back into that line. (Seriously, go read my report. It's embarrassingly detailed.) When it was my turn for a picture, we did the group shot and then Ryan and I took a picture together.

Dean O'Gorman, Me, Ryan Gosling, Joel Tobeck - Santa Monica 1999 Back in those days, we had to actually WAIT to see our pictures because it was film. I'm not sure how long I had to wait for my pictures. I imagine that I had them developed right away and I was most likely VERY relieved to see that the picture of me with the boys was the most amazing shot ever. Look at my happy face. It's ridiculous how happy I look. It is my favorite shot EVER of me with people who are neither family nor friends. I love the picture so much that I used it later that year as my "now" picture for my 10 year high school reunion memory book. People at my reunion asked me if Ryan was my boyfriend because of that picture. It was probably the first time they ever saw Ryan Gosling's face and it was next to me. I wonder if anyone remembers that. Damn, it's weird to think of that way. It would take years before people recognized the talent and appeal of Ryan Gosling but some of my friends remember that I was the one raving about him for years before they realized who he was.

Ryan Gosling Twenty five years later, this group shot is still one of my favorites. It was a favorite before Ryan became Oscar nominated Ryan Gosling. It was a favorite before Dean O'Gorman would play Fili in The Hobbit trilogy. It was a favorite while Joel Tobeck was wreaking havoc as Strife on Young Hercules. It's one of my favorite shots because it was the capper to one of my favorite convention going weekends. I had so much fun with my friends and meeting the guests was just icing on the cake. It was the convention weekend that made me appreciate spending time with my friends as well as enjoying the guests. Some other things of note: - I posted this photo to Twitter years ago and it was my most popular post. It got the attention of Joel Tobeck and he ended up tweeting a picture of him with Sullivan Stapleton to me because I was in my Sully stage at that point. The internet can be such a fun place. - It's also super interesting that I met Ryan on William Gregory Lee's birthday and that a year later, on Ryan's twentieth birthday, I would meet William Gregory Lee at a Xena convention in Palo Alto. It would take me years to make that connection. - Chris sent me the Hercules/Xena crew vest jacket sometime after I mentioned not having his autograph on my Young Hercules poster. Another example of when Twitter was amazing by connecting you to your favorites. I do have Chris' autograph on a Young Hercules still that my friend gave me years ago. I think it's in storage. Should I find it someday, I'll probably scan and post it somewhere. I would still like to someday get Chris to autograph my poster but not sure how that will ever happen. Then again, who knew I'd get a crew vest jacket? It's always fun to dust off the group shot and remember that weekend. It's super wild to me that this was twenty-five years ago. Time flies...

with Ryan Gosling Read the full article

[crazybigredlove]

17th August 2013

Dear Pete, 

Today your brother was charming enough to lean across during a commercial break, take my hand, look me square in the eyes and say, "How come you're such a prick magnet?" Without a pause I shot back, "Oh I don't know. What was it about me that made you want to have sex with me? 

Awkward silence followed and his cheeks flushed. 

Earlier in the evening I'd ventured out for a meal with The Czech and he'd demanded a full, up-to-the-minute account of my latest dating adventures and mishaps. When I finished my epic tale of gloom, he looked at me with both eyebrows raised, eyes wide, and his lips flat-lining in that way he does when he's amused but wants to hide it from the world. After a pause he finally spoke. 

"Well, at least no one will ever say you're a quitter!" At the time I laughed. A lot. After all, he would know. 

The reason we were out at dinner was because last night I reached the point where I had to accept that my days of dragging my feet or stomping them moodily as I pouted over the injustice that was meeting Big Red need to come to an end. Getting laid and finding a boyfriend when you cry all the time is probably significantly harder than being normal single. I know. They said so in Love Actually and I do not need that added pressure in my life. 

The reality of it all made me sad, which is the opposite of what I want to be, so in that moment of absolute weakness I reached out to The Czech. Why? I don't know. 

Oh yeah, BECAUSE I'M A CRAZY PERSON WHO IS UNABLE TO HATE GUYS SHE'S DATED. 

It had been a while since we last spoke to each other, well, maybe not that long, but at least a week or so. Longer than we usually go anyway. 

When we were dating I always knew it was going to be an uphill battle. He had more demons than I could name and the fear I carried with me was giving up on him too soon. Through the journey that was our dating mishap, from the passionate start through to the fizzle at the end and then on past the steep hills of in-between, moving towards friendship, I didn't want to be the girl who gave up too soon and missed out on something amazing. 

I endured rugged mountains, horrific battles, and no one around me ever understood why. They labelled it an obsession, and said that our relationship was unhealthy. They said all that because our "relationship" actually only lasted three dates and it took us nearly two months to string them together. From the start we both claimed we were committed to each other but it was as far removed from a relationship as I've ever heard of and it definitely isn't the storyline in any of my Ryan Gosling movies. It still had the potential to be my own slice of Romeo and Julie, except that the lead male was looking for more of an open arrangement that involved zero commitment and nothing that resembled couple- like behaviour. 

When you're in one of those relationships there is often this sense that the reason you stick it out is because you're meant to be together. You are Romeo & Juliet. Star-crossed lovers who face endless battles to test your love but who will ultimately arrive at a superior love because of your willingness to survive those conflicts. You are in love, dammit! And no stupid little hurdle on the road to eternal happiness - you know, like cheating, or distance, or him having a girlfriend on the side, or not returning your calls, or calling you fat, the usual stuff - will stop you because no one has ever felt like you have before! And after sticking it out so goddam long, you deserve some frikken wedding bells! Where is your white dress, dammit?! 

And then reality kicks back in and you remember that you're a crazy person and he's a jerk. If you think that about your own relationship and you stick it out you're an idiot. For realz. You have head trauma and/or need a therapist. Or possibly a neurosurgeon. You are delusional. A moron. There may be a bleed in your brain. Or a tumour. I'm not really sure exactly, but something that is interfering with your ability to see reality. Love is not meant to feel like being repeatedly stabbed in the gut. Once more for the cheap seats: Love is not meant to feel like being repeatedly stabbed in the gut. 

The truth is that over time you just become adept at hurting each other and healing. You look the other way. Some couples have a routine that involves the gym, shopping, work, making school lunches. Our routine involved seeing how much damage we could either inflict or heal from in only three short dates and a whole lot of vague, power play messaging. 

Welcome to dating in the face of the social media revolution. A man in a relationship can send you forty messages in a day but apparently it's not cheating and you're silly if you feel uncomfortable about the attention because you're "just friends". A guy can constantly comment on your every social media move but it doesn't mean he wants anything more from you than sex or the return of attention in those same mediums. A boy can apparently update his Facebook status ten times, not reply to your text message for several days, but you're supposed to know that doesn't mean he's not keen. 

Fuck all that. Seriously. Fuck it. Social media has made it impossible to tell which guys are genuinely interested and which are just desperate for a little ego stroking and attention from anyone with a keyboard. The Czech is no exception. 

When I contacted him last night he asked if I wanted to grab dinner with him. Once there I made him talk me through it. "It". The mind-fuckery that was our relationship. Kind of like my own High Fidelity moment. 

"Why did we bother continuing to date when you obviously weren't that interested in a relationship? It was pretty obvious that was what I wanted." He cleared his throat. "Well..." 

Raising a fork to my mouth I watched him intently as I chewed: the way he started to squirm in his seat, the way he was suddenly dying of thirst and gulping water down. It seemed cruel to not toss a lifeline his way. "It's okay. You don't have to tell me." "It's not that I don't want to..." 

"Okay, then what?" "It's more that I don't know how. I don't know what the answer is." Picking up his fork he started poking at the food on his plate, but he didn't eat it. Pulled pork. It didn't matter where we went, if it was on the menu he always ordered it. And it didn't matter how often he ordered it, the name still made me giggle. "It was never romantic for you, was it?" Placing the fork down, his gaze drifted out the window. "No." "Was it just sex? Were you ever interested in me?" "Liv, I enjoy your company, I never lied about that, but you're looking for a final first date, not just a first date. It was always going to be fun for me and you wanted more from the first minute." "That's not true!" My cheeks reddened with the humility of it all. The burning in my body and the way my muscles gave an involuntary spasm and locked was a lesser version of what I imagined being tasered would feel like. Desperately I wanted the conversation in the past and forgotten before my embarrassment continued climbing to levels I couldn't recover from and I was forced to run from the restaurant, tears streaming down my face. 

Of course if I did hightail it outta there, that would be a perfect moment to lose a shoe and see if my Cinderella fantasy plays out the Disney way... 

"So, how's work going?" It was a second lifeline and maybe it was weak of me, but he looked so bothered by not being able to vocalise what was happening in his head that I didn't see the point in dragging it out, especially when the answer wasn't bringing me any happiness either. Plus, I was not prepared to lose one of my shoes and have to hobble home. Relief washed his face. "Yeah, it's been really good. Busy, but good." 

There was still a sting in my cheeks, but I knew enough to know that it was a hit to my ego and not to anything as delicate as my heart. Yes that does sound tragically pretentious and like the self- consumed loser that I am. I won't apologise for it. Besides, my ego is as delicate as rose petals so it may as well have been my heart. 

It would've been so easy to go home with him, to have a tryst with a man who couldn't even explain the time spent with me in terms of how much he liked me. Why bother though? Chances are the friendship would end the same time the sweaty act did and I have this terrible habit of hanging onto men. Of keeping them around as if they're an insurance policy or a back-up plan. Stage one of building this new me is deciding I'm not going to do that anymore. I am ridding myself of all men who should've been left in my past. 

So we had dinner and then we went our separate ways. The Czech seems to have an amazing capacity for knowing when I'm at my most vulnerable and it's always those moments that he chooses to reappear. Let's be real: we probably haven't heard the last of him. 

It was once I was home and recounting the events of the evening from the comfort of our battered old couch that Christopher felt a need to touch my arm and reinforce what I already believed: that men with extreme commitment issues are inexplicably drawn to me. Rather than offering words of comfort or a pep talk to convince me to get back out in the dating game, once Christopher had stopped blushing he turned the television on. 

"They haven't all been that bad!" I protested, knowing damn well that they had been. "Yes, Liv. They really have been. The funniest part is that most of them have these serious commitment issues, but it's like you cure them of that because they pretty much all want to marry the girl after you." 

Resisted the urge to punch him somewhere that could hamper his chances of having children. "I'm glad you pointed that out. For someone as obsessive as myself you can imagine how that teensy, tiny detail managed to escape my attention." 

"Here's a thought: why don't you try dating someone who actually likes you?" 

Your brother is such a problem solver. The future looks rosy from where I'm sitting. 

Liv x 

[khangthecinephile]

The Notebook (2004): True love never dies

The Notebook came out in 2004 by the director Nick Cassavetes as an adaptation of  Nicholas Sparks’ iconic romance novel. The book reflects the relationship between Sparks himself and her wife. The story of Noah (Ryan Gosling) and Allie (Rachel McAdams) really left a lot of impression on me and also lots of other people watching it. The Notebook explores the theme of true love and love beyond obstacles. 

Noah is a poor carpenter who grew up in Seabrook and leads a very free lifestyle. Allie, on the other hand, comes from a wealthy family who has a really busy schedule together and lives under parental control. Allie comes to Seabrook to spend her summer, where she meets Noah and they fall in love at first sight. Noah is willing to do crazy things like climbing a ferris wheel just to prompt Allie to go out with him. Their love is very pure and powerful; they come together very naturally without anyone pushing it, thus representing the energy of youth and love of teenagers. Allie's parents only think of this relationship as normal summer love and they would leave each other soonly. The parents also don’t want Allie to love this countryside boy because he isn’t  in the same class. They have differences in class, family background that lead to differences in mindset and opinions. They love each other so much that they get blurred by the differences; they argue all the time but they have one thing in common, like Noah said, they are obsessed about each other. Being aside from one another, they get to be themselves. With Noah, Allie gets to peel off her fancy, glorious image and live like a normal 17 years old girl would with curiosity and desire. Fights and arguments only make them love each other more, it’s a part of a relationship and it makes Noah and Allie understand their partner better. Seeing the love between Noah and Allie growing, Allie’s parents decided to bring their daughter back home. After Allie got forced to leave, Noah patiently wrote 365 letters waiting for Allie to respond, this shows how much love that he has for Allie. Allie also hoped Noah would write but her mother tried to hide the letters and she cried and suffered for months before letting go. In the last letter, even though Noah said that he wanted to let go and move on. Although he wrote that but inside he still loves Allie, he still hopes that one day he can see Allie again, hoping she is going to reply.

Years later, they still can’t get over each other. Noah gets triggered and leaves the bus right away. When he sees Allie again, seeing her happy with Lon, Noah doesn’t want to disrupt their happiness. He buys the dream house that he wants, paints it white like how Allie wanted it. Allie also gets triggered after seeing Noah in a newspaper and she decides to go back to Seabrook just to see Noah one more time before she gets married. And after all of the things that happened, no way they would lose each other again. In my opinion, their kissing scene on the dock under the rain is one of the best scenes in the whole movie. Allie left everything behind and decided to stay with Noah. It is amazing how they both try hard for their relationship. The time really proved their love for eachother. That’s a message for every couple out there to choose what you actually want and follow your heart. Also trying as much as you can for your relationship, for the one that you love. 

The scene between the two when they are old in the nursing home where they sleep together on the same bed and go to heaven together is one of the most iconic images of real love in Hollywood history. They spend every one of their best and worst moments together and at the end they never stop loving each other. As a person that has never experienced love before, The Notebook really gave me lots of emotions. It made me curious and want to experience love in the future. Lastly, I have to give credit to Ryan Gosling and Rachel McAdams, their performance in this movie is absolutely spot on. Their chemistry and everything made me forget that they were acting. What a movie! 

[frecklystars]

if you're his sweet girl, does that make him your sweet boy?? oh my god, that would destroy him fgshghfg

OOGOHGHG anon I am SO HAPPY you brought this up 😍😍😍 thank you!!!!

I genuinely cannot think of a nickname to call him!!! I'm normally so quick to come up with nicknames, Starlight/Starflower (starscream), Prince/Princesa (bruno), Champion/Little Warrior (megatron)... but Ken?? Ken??? I deadass cannot think of what I'd call him and I've seen this movie 7 times now...

I love him calling me "sweet girl" and even then, I'm not the one who came up with it, it was Ryan Gosling. He shouted "my sweet girl!" instead of "sublime!" in one of the takes, he apparently improvised 20 different lines for that scene, according to Margot. And the second I heard that, I was like "oh I'd LOVE for him to call me that" but I still can't figure out what to call HIM!!!

I've thought of "cowboy" but I already call Spike Spiegel "space cowboy", and just the lone word "cowboy" doesn't feel like something I can roll off of my tongue easily. especially if he isn't wearing his cowboy getup most of the time haha. I've thought of "blondie" because of the song "hey blondie" on the soundtrack, but idk I feel like blondie would be a bit demeaning, and it wouldn't be something I'd call him regularly bc it doesn't sound super romantic. I could always go with the generic "baby" "handsome" "honey" but I normally like to spice up my nicknames and cater it to the actual character, like I always call Bumblebee "Honeybee" in any iteration, I always call Starscream "Starlight", Plankton is my "Big Guy" -- I try to make these nicknames personalized to their character as much as possible so it makes my self ship feel special -- BUT GOSH DARN IT, I JUST CAN'T COME UP WITH ANYTHING FOR KEN???? The worst one I've come up with is "Kennykins" during a moment of desperation and that's immediately crossed off the ideas list 😂😂

I like your suggestion "my sweet boy", but when I say it out loud it reminds me of my friend's dog because I always call him sweet boy 😂 I mean, Ken DOES have golden retriever energy and his puppydog eyes totally obliterate me. I might try that a bit more, might write it in some fics to see how it feels. If you have more ideas anon, please feel free to tell me!!! 🌟✨

Thank you for sending me this ask btw, this made my day hehe <3

[yoonpobs]

cold | pjm

pairing: park jimin x oc

genre: fluff, slight tsundere jimin, just cuteness tbh

words: 3, 339

summary: where jimin is ice cold but he wants you to warm him up (not in the way you think)

When Jimin pulls away for the first time in a year since you’ve met him during your movie nights, you suspect that something’s up. But, you also know Jimin—he would have said something to you if there was.

You raise an eyebrow at him, “You good?”

Jimin sighs at you, frustrated and you can’t help but feel confused at the sudden shift of atmosphere. You thought picking La La Land was a good choice, but you suppose that since Jimin was a little emotionally constipated he didn’t like it as much.

“I’m not, actually.” He declares, tugging off the blanket that covered both of your lower halves and withdrew from the warmth that settled into the couch.

“Do you—” You contemplate on asking because being Jimin’s friend meant respecting certain boundaries, and you weren't intending to be that friend that stuck their nose in his business.

You choose to remain silent and purse your lips and settle back into the couch, though it felt a little empty without Jimin bunched up next to you. But he was an enigma of unopened thoughts, and the time you spent navigating the course of your friendship in the first few months was ... heavy.

He’d never tell you anything, let alone allow you to indulge in the greatness that was his mind. You’d always hear from Namjoon how much he looks up to and respects Jimin’s way of thinking and mindset, but you rarely get to see that part of him. Sometimes, you felt more of a seat-warmer than a friend. You appreciate him, nonetheless.

“Aren’t you going to ask me about it?” He pries you.

You shrug, covering yourself with the blanket in hopes that it masks your vulnerability and insecurity, too.

“I know you.” You tell him, “You don’t like being questioned unless you say something about it first.”

He purses his lips in a straight line and looks at you ... like he really looks at you. So much that you feel his eyes burning into the side of your head; as if he was attempting to unravel your mind and dig into its deepest depths to understand its content.

“I don’t …” He says after looking at you, head-turning to face the television. Was La La Land seriously still relevant now?

“But I’m asking you to ask me.” He says, and the look of surprise on your face doesn’t disappoint. You gaped at him, forgetting the fact that Ryan Gosling looked really handsome on the screen—because Jimin had just prompted you to ask him about his … feelings.

“I—I don’t understand …” You say, dumbly. He rolls his eyes at you, and you’re familiar with his expression because it’s the one he usually has when he wants to call you an idiot.

“Ask me how I feel.”

You open your mouth, then close it. Your words fail you because the entire situation was sprung onto you so unexpectedly, and you suddenly feel self-conscious about everything. Was this Jimin’s way of assessing you as a friend and throwing you to the curb after a year of being platonically involved with one another?

As if he could hear the millions of thoughts running in your head, he turns to you and grabs your cheeks in between his large palms, and this time you actually short-circuit.

Your intimacy with Jimin stopped at sitting next to each other during movie nights and embracing the warmth that your bodies radiated. Maybe even the occasional accidental brush of fingers when he hands you something, but besides that—Jimin was conservative with his touches.

You can’t lie and say that your heart doesn’t react differently, because for the most part of your friendship you’ve suppressed any romantic feelings that you had or could have had for Jimin. Mostly out of self-preservation because Jimin was just … Jimin.

Cold, aloof but still someone that cared deeply. Yes, he was emotionally constipated when it came to his own feelings, and yes —his gaze more often than not had you cowering in fear. But he never made you feel uncomfortable. Even in the silences, you spent with one another you felt safe. Home.

Not to mention, his entire brooding and stoic persona hit it really well with the women on campus—and the fact he was obscenely attractive. He and you were the types of people that remained just as friends. And suddenly, that could end tonight, too.

“What’s going on in that pretty head of yours?” He hums, eyes chasing your own but you divert your attention away from him because your eyes tell.

You shake your head, “I’m just confused.”

And confused you were because this was a territory that was unheard of for you—much less for Jimin. If only you could telepathically speak to Namjoon right now because you had no idea what to do or say.

“Well, I’ll keep it simple for you,” He says, “ Ask me how I feel.”

He doesn’t ask you anymore, instead, he insists—as if there was a preconceived answer for you already in the back of his head. Maybe this was how he softened the blow.

“No.” You push him away, flustered. “I won’t let you friend break up with me like this!”

He raises an eyebrow at the sudden rise of voice you admitted, “I like being your friend even if you don’t—and—and I know that yeah, consent matters—but I do not consent to be friend broken up with.”

He listens to you, and his face is still in its signature blankness and you nearly scream at how you wished he’d display a little emotion or a reaction to your blow up. But it seems that between the two of you, you were the emotionally unstable one.

“I know I can be annoying and all over the place and loud but ...” You immediately opt to self-deprecate yourself because nothing could triumph the way it felt to do it yourself than have him say it to your face, “... you’re not allowed to leave me. Ever .”

You fold your arms across your chest and look away because what the fuck did you just do and your face was undebatably on fire right now.

As if he’s noticed the way your eyes widen in realisation, he holds you again—but this time he pulls you closer to his chest until you are forced to look up at him with your flushed cheeks.

“Silly girl.” He hums and you whine.

“What!”

“I have to do everything myself, hm?” He tucks a strand of stray hair behind your ears and it was instinctual for you to pull away because you’ve never felt Jimin like this before. Close, and warm—and all yours.

“Jimin I don’t understand— mpf!” And it was like a scene straight out of a romcom, and you nearly forget that La La Land was still running in the background. You felt like the main character of your own movie, and Jimin was the protagonist's love interest because he kissed you.

Jimin was kissing you.

Kissing. Like lip-locking. Sharing saliva. With you.

He pulls away too soon for your liking, but you gape at him like a fish out of water.

“You—” You stutter, and he chuckles. You feel it more than you hear it because his chest was resting against your cheek.

“Do you understand now?”

You shake your head, “... you feel bad for me?”

He snorts.

“I don’t know if you’re actually this much of an idiot, or are you just hopeless in the romantic department?” He says, and you open your mouth in the offense, ready to defend yourself but he hugs you closer to him and all you could feel was him.

“Excuse me? I’m not an idiot.”

“I just kissed you and you thought I felt bad for you.”

You huff, “What am I supposed to feel! You never speak about your emotions to me, and the most I’ve ever got out from you was a chuckle from the time where I slipped in front of the entire campus during freshers week.”

“That was when we met, yes.” He hums, “Why did you think I’ve been with you ever since?”

You still looked confused and Jimin internally sighs at the way he let himself fall for a dense excuse of a human being like you.

“Cause … you felt 'bad for me?”

"Just because you air-quote it doesn't make it any different from what you said earlier ____."

He groans, “No you dumbass—it’s cause no one makes me feel things the way you do. Strange weirdo who slipped on absolutely nothing, and as a friend who forces me to watch shitty romcoms like La La Land.”

“La La Land is not shitty!” You gasp.

He blinks.

“Is that all you got from what I said?”

“La La Land is phenomenal! All from the artistic production, to the soundtrack—so I don't know why people keep shitting on it because personally I really enjoyed—” But he kisses you again, and you melt into him immediately.

This time he lingers for a bit longer, and when he pulls away you grab onto his shirt to keep him close. You realise your mistake and suddenly push him away, but his hold on you was tight enough to resist your poor attempt.

“I like you, dummy.” He says, and you gasp.

“Nooo.” You say in disbelief.

“I like you.” He emphasises again, and you gasp. Again.

“No, you don’t.” You tell him, and he sighs—knowing that this was going to take a while.

“I do.”

“You don’t.”

“I do .”

“Nope.”

“ Yes .”

“Nuh-uh—!”

He clamps his hand over your mouth and glares at you.

“Me. Park Jimin—likes you, ____ ____, and yes —I can’t believe I like a complete idiot like you, but I do because you fucked up and made me like you from the moment you embarrassed yourself in front of everyone so bad that it was probably the hardest I’ve ever cringed in my life—”

“Hey!”

“—but you quite literally stumbled into my life with your whirlwind of emotions and you made me feel things that I’ve tried to avoid my entire life.” He holds your chin between his thumb and finger so you’d look at him. And you know that Jimin never lies, but something in your heart doesn't allow you that moment of happiness for yourself.

“But I'm annoying …” You say, a little unsure. Jimin simply looks at you, and you're frustrated again at the lack of emotion on his face.

“Yes, you are.” Is all he says, and you gape at his audacity.

You huff, throw the blanket off your body and make way to grab at your belongings that lay idle on the floor next to the couch. You pulled away from Jimin who attempted to grab at your wrist and glare at him so vehemently that he looked taken aback.

“This isn't a joke.” You tell him, and you hoped you looked as strong as you sounded because you felt played. Jimin didn't do this—you were just the clumsy freshmen that somehow befriended him, and he had no way out of it. So you decided to give him a way out on your own.

“Wait—of course, it's not—where are you going?” He exasperates when you make a beeline go to his door. You've never seen Jimin move as quickly as he did, but he manages to secure a tight grip on your elbow.

You try to shove him aside all while you felt like an immense idiot for allowing yourself to feel this way. To feel so human, and raw when you were with Jimin when he hadn't shown an inkling of emotion even when he declared that he ‘liked’ you.

“____—what’s wrong? Is it because I kissed you without asking you? I'm sorry but— ” He apologises and you groan.

“Stop treating me like this!” You yell at him to cut him off, “I know I'm clumsy, and a ditz—but I have feelings and it's not cool how you're doing all of—” You gesture to the hand on your elbow and to your lips, “— this, making me feel things that I shouldn't be feeling.”

“You're missing the point—!”

“Am I Jimin?” You exasperate, and he lets go of you for a moment to allow you space. “You've never shown any sign that you liked me for the past year of being friends, and now you're telling me you do?”

You scoff, “If you wanted out of this friendship, here it is.”

You reach to his doorknob with your back turned towards him, but Jimin was far stronger than you and reached out at the same time; essentially locking you into your position with nowhere to go.

“Just let me go,” You sigh, “I'm giving you your out.”

Jimin turns your body to face him and you avoid his stare. He was taller than you so being locked against the door was a little intimidating, given the fact that Jimin’s stare was nothing short of intimidating.

“Why would I want out?” He asks you, and you blink at him as if he's grown a second head.

“Now you're just treating me like I'm stupid .” You pout, “Did you not hear what I said? I know I'm annoying and I'll get out of your hair, just let me go—!”

You pull at his wrist but he holds you tighter and uses his other hand to softly grab at your cheeks to look at him. You stare at him with wide eyes and mouth scrunched like a fish, and you're sure this doesn't look the least bit flattering at all.

“Dude!”

“Please don't dude me after I just said I liked you.” He grimaces, then sighs.

He proceeds to clamp his hand over your mouth, “Now I need you to listen to me. And I mean— really listen. Not the thing that you do where you completely ignore my point and go on some childish rampage of how I think you’re annoying and want out.”

You glare at him.

He sighs, “I don't know how explicit I have to be—but I like you. I like your presence, I like hanging out with you—and I want to date you. I want everything that's in the book of romance and relationships with you.”

Your eyes widened and you attempt to speak but he clamps down harder than you whine.

“I know I'm an emotionless brick but I've been with you for the past year and my physical presence is the way I show you that I like you.”

You blink.

“And, I don't know if you've noticed but I've been inviting you over every fortnight just to cuddle up next to you to watch movies that are cheesy as fuck because I know that it makes your heart flutter—” He looks straight into your eyes and you're sure he can feel the heat of your cheeks on his hand.

“—I didn’t say this earlier because I was under the impression that you were aware and that we were kind-of-dating but not really— clearly, I was wrong.”

You manage to rip his hand off in his moment of weakness and gasp, “Kind-of-dating? Since when did that even happen?!”

He pointedly looks at you, “You have a toothbrush at my place, half of your closet is in mine—you walk my dog when I'm not home, and I buy your favourite cereal when I do groceries.”

“But—”

“Nope—the only reason I explicitly told you tonight because it was now clear to me that you weren't aware—” He gestures to your frazzled state, “—and that you said you were going out with Taehyung. Alone. To a pizza parlour.”

You barely manage to respond because he exasperates, “Do you know how datey a pizza parlour is?”

You gape at him, “Well excuse me! I didn't even know we were kind-of-dating until a minute ago!”

He glares at you, “And you didn't even believe me when I told you I liked you.”

You fold your arms across your chest, “Obviously. You don't even hold my hand, and you've never kissed me until tonight.”

You punch his shoulder and he hisses, “You didn't even formally ask me out!”

“You’re a scaredy-cat and if I did ask you out you’d probably run away from me!” He exasperates with his hands in the air.

“I’m not a scaredy-cat and I won’t run away!” You argue back and you were suddenly aware of how close he was to you.

You look up at him and notice how pretty his eyelashes were, and how he does look at you with an intimacy that you've only seen for yourself. The look that he reserved for you.

“I'm asking you out now,” He whispers, cupping your cheek.

“Date me. Be with me.”

You scoff, “God. Can’t you even be a little romantic? It’s like you’re demanding me to be with you.” You respond petulantly like a child.

He groans, “I'm not going to grovel you if that's what you're expecting.”

“Tell me why then.”

He raises an eyebrow.

You clear your throat and fiddle with your thumbs, a nervous tick you have.

“Tell me why you like me.”

Jimin stares at you and you want to complain about his stoic expression but he cups your cheeks in his hands a little harder and forces you to really look at him—as if his face held all the answers.

And when you did, you see the desperation behind his eyes, the dedication that he possesses only for you. The way he looks at you like he's meant to prove something to you, and then everything made sense to you—he wasn't inexpressive—you were just too caught up in your own world that you never noticed.

“Jimin—” Your voice cracks but he shushes you, softly.

“Listen to me, okay?” He asks of you and you gently nod.

“I like you because you're here,” He starts off and you were about to scoff but he speaks again knowing your predetermined reaction, “You’re present— always. I don't mean just because we're always together, but because even when we're texting you're there. You're involved.”

“You're expressive in ways that don't need words to tell me anything, which is why I know you like me too.”

“Cocky, much?” You scoff but the burn on your cheeks give the truth away

He smiles a little before continuing, “But that's not it—I like you because you're patient. You stuck with me being emotionally constipated for the first half of our friendship, and yet you're still here.”

“Even though you nearly ran out of here spewing some bullshit about me taking you as a joke—”

“Okay … I may have blown it out of proportion.”

“—but I wouldn't want to have you any other way. Even if it took me literally trapping you against a door for you to listen.”

You melt into his touch and look up at him, “Do you really like me?”

“I really do.” He affirms you, and you tug him closer to bury your head into his chest.

“Can you hold my hand next time?” You ask, softly. And he chuckles against the top of your head, caressing it gently.

“Of course. That's the only way you won't run away from me next time, right?” He teases.

You whine.

“I'm never going to let you go.” He tells you, “You're pretty like this—all mine .”

You smile up at him and Jimin swears his heart melts to be rebuilt whole by you again.

“But you called me an idiot ...”

“Two things can be true at the same time.”

You gasp, “Rude—!”

He shuts you up with a kiss more passionate, and a lot more eager that has your head spinning.

When he pulls away, you feel your heartbeat a little faster—especially at the string of saliva that connects your mouths.

“Mine,” He says. You can't help but nod.

His.