#but the songs are great and i think its a really cool change that instead of tracy winning at the end the kid does

[toytulini]

i made an oc thats at least nicknamed "Stupid" and im constantly thinking about what a power move that is tbh

[m0llygunn]

It Gets Worse (Eddie Munson x fem!reader)

Part 2 to Same Old Song and Dance

Summary: As the rhythm of your never ending dance with Eddie speeds up, things change, but is it really for the worse?

Tropes: bully!eddie (kind of), mean!eddie (not rlly tho), enemies to lovers Warnings: 18+, mature language, pet names (princess), oral (male receiving), smut. Authors Notes: thank you to everyone who reblogged/interacted with the first part!! it was the second thing I ever posted on here so it was very cool for me. I hope you like part 2. Part 3 soon! wc: 6.2k

tags: @needylilgal022 @tlclick73

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

“It was a poor lapse in judgment. That’s all. If he’s suddenly nicer to me, good. If he stays his same undignified self, fine.” You say, scribbling down the notes you missed. 

You were ‘sick’ yesterday. After what happened with Eddie, you had to be. 

“I think you’re missing one more option there.” Nancy says, eyebrows turned up in concern. 

“I’m not.” You shrug.

“You are.” She persists. 

“Fine, Nance. What am I missing?” You say, putting your pencil down and giving her your full attention.

“He gets worse.” 

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

Eddie left your house pretty quickly after it all went down. Probably desperate to get home and ‘rub one out’ as he so eloquently put it. 

You were fine after he left, still riding the post orgasm high. 

It was only after you sat down, taking out your school work, that the worksheet from Mrs. Ward's class knocked you back down to earth. 

You let Eddie Munson, the boy who has terrorized you since elementary school, finger you. And the worst part, it was good. Great, even. 

So naturally, you were sick the next day. You enjoyed yourself an Eddie Munson free day from the safety of your bed. 

Around 7 that night, Nancy called you telling you that Eddie was asking where you were at school. And of course, Nancy with her inquisitive— and extremely persuasive mind, got you to spill your guts. She knows all about your ongoing hostility with Eddie, but for some reason, what happened between you two didn’t surprise her in the slightest. 

In exchange for the gory details of your afternoon with Eddie, she agreed to meet you on the bleachers before school started to borrow her notes. 

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

Eddie sauntered into class as if he wasn’t late. He wasn’t phased as Mrs. Ward scolded him. With a muttered ‘Sorry’, he stepped into the classroom, eyes narrowed on you, with a buzzing excitement coursing through his veins and an extra pep in his step.

You had managed to avoid Eddie the whole day up until now.

His eyes burned into you from the minute he appeared in the doorway. The only thing you could do was sit up straighter and pretend like you couldn’t see him. 

Even as he purposefully passed in front of your desk, knocking his fist on the surface as he rounded to his own seat, you pretended he was nothing but a pesky house fly that just barely got on your nerves with its ceaseless buzzing. 

When a note landed on your desk only minutes after his arrival, you took your time opening it. 

‘Where were you?’ was scribbled out in red ink. It didn’t deserve your response. 

Instead, you gathered your hair in your hands, swirling it around your fingers, tying it into a tight bun at the base of your neck. Pulling out a few pieces of hair to frame your face, careful to make sure no strands were inherently ‘pullable'. 

When Mrs. Ward dedicates the remaining portion of class to working with your partners, you close your eyes inhaling deeply before turning.

“Why were you asking Nancy where I was yesterday? Are you, like, obsessed with me now?” You say, beating Eddie to the chase. His eyes open wide, mouth dropping slightly, as his cheeks tinge pink. 

“No.” He says quietly, eyes dropping to his desk where his notebook lays blank, page ripped in half from the note he threw at you. 

“So what then?” You snap. 

He shrugs.

You weren’t expecting him to give up just like that. You jumped the gun on an unexpecting target. The dance is only fun with two people. 

Silence between you two, you set your worksheet down on his desk, swiveling your body to face him. 

As you cross your legs under his desk, your foot rubs his shin and he doesn’t even make any of his usual stupid comments. He doesn’t even look up. 

So you do it again. And again. You let your foot trail up from his ankle all the way to his calf as you scribble ideas down on your worksheet. 

When you hook your foot around his leg you’re surprised when you feel fingers grip your bare ankle.

“Fucking quit it.” He hisses, lifting your leg higher until your knee hits the bottom of his desk in a thud.

“Eddie. I’m wearing a skirt. Let. Go.” You snap, trying to break his grip. 

“Oh, but I thought you liked attention?” He scoffs, eyes set on you harshly.

“Let. Go.” You repeat, kicking your leg trying to free yourself but his grip only gets stronger. 

“You like attention so much, princess, that your giant ego just assumed I was obsessed with you, huh?” He says, amusement rising in his blazen eyes as he watches the way your brows pinch. 

You kick your leg again and his grip becomes impossibly tight, his fingertips nearly bruising into your skin. 

“You’re hurting me, Eddie.” You hiss, your voice gaining the attention of a few surrounding students. 

His grip loosens immediately, dropping your ankle from his hand, and he makes fast work of kicking his chair back and standing from the desk.

Mrs. Ward yells after him as he leaves the class but he doesn’t stop. He doesn’t even look back. 

You don’t go after him and he doesn’t return to class either. The bell rings and you pack up your stuff, eyes flickering to the door waiting for him to come back for his notebook. He doesn’t though, so you close the notebook, stacking it on top of your own books before exiting the class.

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

You weren’t going to actively seek him out to give him his notebook back. You were just going to hand it to him in passing. The only issue is, you haven’t seen him. 

“Hey. Your name's Gareth, right?” You say, walking up to the boy as he closes his locker.

“Yeah.” He says, smirking as he looks at you.

“Oh, I’m-”

“We know who you are.” Another boy, who you think is named Jeff, says from the other side of Gareth.

“Eddie’s not around. Was pretty pissed off, actually. Something to do with you, I’m assuming?” Gareth says, brows lifting as he awaits your response.

“Why would it be because of me? He’s the one with the problem.” You scoff, furrowing your brows angrily. Gareth's smirk drops immediately, turning timid under your fire. 

“Hey, hey. Sorry. We just hear about you all the time, it’s exhaust—”

“Gareth.” Jeff cuts him off, shooting him a look.

“Dude, c’mon.” Gareth says to Jeff. Jeff shoots him another pointed look before they start silently communicating with each other through looks.

“Where is he?” You huff, getting annoyed. 

“Your guess is as good as ours.” Gareth says with a shrug. 

“Thanks.” You scoff, spinning on your feet, mad at yourself for even bothering to try and find Eddie. 

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

The notebook’s been taunting you all day, especially now as you sit in your room trying to get your homework done. There it is peeking out from your bag. 

Giving into temptation, you grab the book, taking it to your bed.

Flipping open the first page, it’s just doodles. Flipping another page, more doodles, another page, even more doodles. 

Skipping a few pages you finally find some scribbled messy writing that you can just barely make out. Something about someone named mage? Something about… a dwarf? 

You skip more pages and it’s the same nonsensical writing with something about a sorcerer until it clicks. You find a page titled hellfire and you realize it has to be that nerdy fantasy game he plays with his little friends. 

You quickly get bored. You were hoping for something juicy, something that would provide you with ammunition against him. It’s mostly just a lot of drawings of tits and weird looking demon-y things. 

You slide the notebook under your pillow before going back to your homework. 

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

A knock at your window startles you, heart pounding rapidly against your ribs. When you see eyes through the gap in the curtain your heart nearly stops until you recognize them. Then your heart speeds up again.

You go back to reading your book, kicking your legs back and forth behind you.

He knocks again and you wave. He points to the lock and you shrug, going back to your book, trying to hide the smile tugging at your lips. 

A third knock. It’s much more aggressive and shakes the shutters making you jump. If your dad was actually home, that would have woken him but he’s not. It’s just you and you know Eddie knows it too because of the empty driveway.

“Jesus Christ.” You mutter to yourself, pushing off your bed.

You unlock the window and he’s quickly pushing it open.

“Notebook.” He says flatly, holding his hand out. 

“Notebook?” You question innocently. 

“Notebook.” He repeats harshly, making you clench your jaw. Who does he think he is, coming to your house and talking to you like that?

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” You say, turning around and going back to laying on your stomach with your book. 

“You have my notebook.” He states, still perching outside.

“Why would I have your stupid notebook?” You sneer, rolling your eyes. 

“You have it.” He sighs, pushing the window open as wide as it can go. 

“I don’t even see why you would need it at this hour, I never took you as a studier.” You say indifferently, flipping the page of your book. 

You watch out of your periphery as he crawls through your window seamlessly, landing gently on the carpeted floor. 

“Shoes off.” You say but he ignores you, stepping further into the room. “Eddie, I said shoes off.” You repeat more sternly. He mumbles something that you don’t quite catch before he’s kicking off his shoes.

He moves to the side of the bed, standing with his arms crossed, fingers tapping on his forearm. He exhales through his nose in an almost growl and you happily keep your attention on your book as you get him all worked up. 

“Princess, I know you have it, just hand it over so I can go.” He snarls. 

“No.” You say stubbornly, eyes still glued to the pages of your book. 

You see him turn, head darting around the room before landing on your bag next to your desk. He swiftly moves to the bag, picking it up, and before you have time to protest, he’s dumping the contents on the floor.

“What the fuck did you do that for?” You hiss, throwing your book to the side and jumping up from your bed. 

He uses his foot to push around your bag’s contents before giving up since it’s not there. You lower to your knees, picking up your stuff hastily and putting it back in your bag. 

You can feel Eddie’s eyes on you as you gather your things and you're waiting for a snide remark, you know it’s coming.

“You look pretty on your knees like that, princess.” He says, voice low making your stomach squeeze. 

You look up at him with furrowed brows, and his eyes are set on you, looking down the slope of his nose, watching intently.

“Perv.” You scoff.

“Careful, princess. I wasn’t the one throwing myself at you in class today.” He says, laughing meanly.

“I wasn’t doing that.” You retort, feeling your cheeks burn hot. You focus your attention on fitting some loose pages back in your folder that he scattered everywhere.

“So what were you doing then?” He says amusedly. 

“I wasn’t doing anything.” You shrug your shoulders trying your best to hold onto your attitude. 

“C’mon, princess. Don’t play dumb, I’m not into bimbos.” He scoffs, his familiar teasing tone slowly coming back and you do your best to hide your excitement at the prospect of Eddie rejoining this little thing you two do. 

You pause your actions before flickering your gaze to him, looking up through your eyelashes as you sit a little taller.

“So what are you into then?” You question, your voice barely above a whisper, purposefully breathy. His eyes connect with yours before dropping lower, licking his lips in the process. 

“Pretty girls on their knees for me.” He smirks, his freshly wet lips glistening, looking all too inviting and it almost makes you squirm. 

“I’m only on my knees cause you’re a dick.” You mumble under your breath, zipping up your bag.

“Cause my dick- what, sweetheart?” He laughs. 

“You are a dick.” You say louder, clenching your jaw at his stupid excuse of a joke.

“C’mon, princess. Lighten up.” He says, stepping forward. You lean back, his crotch being way too close to you, but then he drops, crouching to your level, his face only inches from yours. 

You pause, waiting to see what he’s doing, but he just looks at you. His eyes are unmeeting of your own, choosing to flutter over your features before bringing a hand to your face, pushing a stray piece of hair behind your ear.

“Notebook, princess.” He sings softly, reminding you why he’s here. 

“It’s at school.” You lie, raising your brows challengingly. 

“No it’s not.” He says confidently.

“Yes, it is.” You argue, furrowing your brows at him.

“No, it’s not, princess.” He sighs and you feel his breath fan over your lips. It takes everything in you not to look.

“Eddie, how the fuck would you know?” You seethe, getting frustrated. You’re supposed to be leading this game, you’re the one on your knees. 

“Cause I looked in your locker. I know it’s not in there.” He says coolly, unaffected. 

“How- What do you mean, you looked in my locker?” You say bewildered, fists clenching at your side. 

“I know it’s not in there, so it must be somewhere in here.” He says, ignoring your question, gaze moving around your room before settling back on you. He winks before standing, his crotch appearing directly in your face until he spins on his heels walking towards your bookshelf. “Gonna make me tear apart your pretty room looking for it, princess?” He taunts, starting to pull out books from the shelf at random. 

“It’s not there.” You say firmly.

“Well maybe I’ll take a look just to be sure. Especially since we both know that you like to lie.” He says, shifting around trinkets on the top shelf.

“I don’t lie.” You huff but he ignores you, continuing to poke and prod at your things.

“Oh look, princess has a princess.” He teases, lifting up a ceramic ornament your dad gave you for your fifth birthday. 

“If you break that I’ll kick your ass.” You threaten, standing up and moving to his side, watching him with crossed arms.

“Kinky.” He teases, putting the ornament down before opening your jewelry box.

“Your notebook wouldn't even fit in there.” You say, rolling your eyes. Now he’s just touching stuff to piss you off.

“You never know, princess.” He replies, rifling around, tangling your necklaces in the process before you swat his hand away.

He steps back, looking around your room again.

“Eddie, give it a rest.” You say, exhaling all the air from your lungs in a huff. 

“Princess, give me my notebook.” He sings, before bounding to your dresser. His hand hovers over the top drawer and he looks back at you with a smirk.

“Don’t you dare.” You hiss.

“It could be in here?” He says innocently. “Everybody knows that the underwear drawer is the best drawer for hiding stuff.” He says, wiggling his eyebrows at you.

“It’s not in there.” You state.

“So you wouldn’t mind if I took a peek?” He says, fingertips taping on the handle. You purse your lips, he wants to look at your panties so bad, fine. 

“Go right ahead, Eddie. Live up to your perv reputation.” You say, jetting a hip out. He rolls his eyes, before turning, moving on to a different part of your room.

“I wonder what kind of dirty secrets the princess keeps in her bedside table.” Eddie taunts. 

There are no dirty secrets in your bedside table but you’re sure even if he opened that drawer and found nothing he’d still spin it into something.

“Must be a pretty important notebook for you to be doing all this, Eddie.” You say, trying to distract him.

He turns to you, eyes scanning over you, sizing you up. 

“You must like me being in your room princess, you know, considering you could just hand over the notebook.” He retorts, eyebrows raised in challenge. 

“What? Don’t want me reading your precious notebook? That why you need it so bad?” You taunt.

“Princess, if you must know, I need it for something.” He says, lips pulled in a flat line, unbothered.

“Something? That’s not very specific.” You laugh. 

“I didn’t know you were so interested in my life?” He says, perking up.

“I’m not.” You scoff.

“Keep telling yourself that, maybe one day it’ll come true.” He smirks and you want to smack it right off his face.

“Well, you’re the one who was asking about me yesterday.” You spit, words rolling off your tongue.

“You were sick the day before, god forbid I have a heart and a conscience.” He spits back.

The way your own heart speeds up leaves you stumped for words and he picks it up immediately, choosing to double down on you. 

“You weren’t sick though, were you? No. Princess was playing hooky. Who were you trying to avoid, hm?” He says, stepping closer to you.

“No one.” You say quietly, body turning hot under his interrogation.

“That sounds like another lie to me. It’s hypocritical, princess, to make me try and admit something while you can’t tell me one honest thing.” He says, voice all too daunting for your liking.

“I’m not lying.” You whisper.

His demeanor changes, all smirks and taunting eyes gone as he settles into something serious. 

“Did you regret it? Is that it?” He says quietly, voice staying low but he doesn’t step any closer.

“Regret what?” You deflect, buying time for your heart to stop fluttering so hard.

He steps closer.

“Princess, what did I tell you about playing dumb?” You hear his voice vibrate from his chest, words striking something inside of you like a match.

“You said you like pretty girls on their knees better.” You coo, looking at him through your lashes. Keeping eye contact, you sink to your knees in front of him. 

You watch as his eyes widen and it spurs you on. You’re holding the reins now, you’re in control again. Letting your fingertips hook through his belt loops, you pull him forward until he’s right where you want him.

What surprises you is the way he brings his hand to your cheek. It’s soft and almost tender. You could make the mistake of leaning into it, but you don’t. 

“Princess, what do you want from me?” He whispers softly. His round eyes twinkle in your bedroom lights, captivating you entirely.

“I don’t want anything from you.” You purr, fingers still hooked in his belt loops keeping him in place. His hand on your cheek turns into a thumb running soft circles against your skin. 

“Princess.” He sighs, his chest deflating.

“Do you want me to now?” You ask quietly, letting your eyes flicker to his belt line, referring to his words from the last time you tried to get on your knees for him. 

“I didn’t come here for this.” He says, mouth moving in a tight line like he’s fighting some internal battle.

“Yeah, you came here for your notebook.” You state, raising your brows. “But are you gonna let me suck your dick?”

With his jeans tightening by the second his mouth still mulls back and forth, his thumb running soft circles on your cheek. He swallows and you know he’s made up his mind. 

“S’all yours, princess.” He says, punctuating his words with a gentle tap to your cheek.

Unhooking your fingers from his belt loops, you walk them to the buckle, the jangle of metal filling the room as you work at it. He watches you intently, eyes staring heatedly when you finally get it undone.

“You gonna let me touch you?” You say with a teasing lilt, copying the same words he said to you. He catches your tease, lips turning up, smiling at you with amusement. “C’mon, Eddie. Use your words, I know you got ‘em in that idiot mouth of yours.” You add, digging in further with your mockery. 

“You think you're teasing me, but that’s hot, princess. Keep talking.” He says, voice low and taunting as his narrowed eyes flickering over you.

“How many times have you touched yourself thinking about all those pretty noises I made for you, Eddie?” You coo with a breathy sweetness. His smile wavers but the amused sparkle in his darkening eyes remains strong. 

“You don’t want to know, princess.” He replies carefully. 

“I do, Eddie, that’s why I asked.” You let your fingers drag down his clothed thighs, he still hasn’t given you an answer, so you don’t go any further. “It’s barely been two days, how many times could a boy possibly cum?” You ask coyly. 

“Got a high turnover rate, princess. Can pop one boner after another if something really gets me going.” He laughs and you let your lips turn up at his ridiculousness.

“You didn’t answer me, Eddie.” you say, trailing your nails back up the denim on his thighs. He shuts his mouth harshly before opening it again to speak. 

“Anywhere between 2 to 10 times, whatever you think the best answer is, princess. You’re the smart one here.” You laugh and his cheeks tinge pink just enough for you to notice.

“Eddie, I meant my other question. Are you gonna let me touch you?” You say, dipping your head to look at him through your lashes again. His blush deepens as his eyes drink you in, absorbing everything from the way you look at him to the way you speak. 

“Princess, I always want you to touch me.” He whispers, his voice small, yet genuine, and it makes your stomach flutter terribly. 

“Is that so?” You say feigning indifference, fingers ghosting over the button of his jeans. 

“Please.” He says breathily, swallowing thickly as his eyes follow your dainty movements. 

To have him so willing at your fingertips. To have him say please. To have him. It stirs something in you that it’s never done before. None of the teasing, hair pulling, name calling, none of that has made you feel anything but red hot anger. But this… this isn’t anger. You’re still burning, but it’s not anger anymore. 

His fingers smooth your hair, pulling you from your reverie, drawing your attention up to him. His eyes are waiting for you, softer than ever. It makes you want to scream. Makes you want to lash out. Stomp your foot. Throw something.

But you don’t do that. Instead you undo the button to his jeans and lower the zipper. 

“You okay, princess?” Eddie whispers, breaking the silence.

“What?” You snarl, scrunching your face, glaring at him. Overcompensating with an edge. Hiding behind a thin disguise.

“You just went quiet. You don’t have to if you don’t want to.” He says calmly despite the reckless edge you just threw at him. His fingers pass over the top of your head gently, smoothing your hair again.

“Eddie, I can make my own decisions, thank you very much.” You scoff. 

“Jesus Christ. I try to be nice and this is what I get?” He huffs but there’s barely any malice behind it, just enough to rile you up. 

“Eddie. You just fucking said I was the smart one here, don’t you think I can make my own decisions?” You retort harshly. 

“I know you can, princess.” He says exasperatedly. “Fuck, I think I liked it better when you were quiet, can we go back to that?” He groans.

“Fuck you.” You spit aggressively, hands starting to tug down his denim. You half expected him to stop you but he doesn’t. Instead, when you get them down his thighs, he helps you, kicking them off to the side. 

Left in his plaid boxers, you hook your fingers around the waist band, and look up to him for permission. With a nod, you pull them down, fabric pooling around his feet.

He bobs against his lower belly before settling in front of you. You try not to react, you can’t give him that. The mean part of you was hoping he’d be small just so you could use it against him, another part of you glows with excitement because he’s not. He’s perfect and you would never tell him that.

You take him in your hand and immediately his breath catches in his throat. Barely moving, a whimper rises in his chest. Oh, this is gonna be fun.

You spit in your hand, bringing it to his length, spreading it all over with both hands, making sure he’s nice and wet. 

“Fuck.” He groans and you can’t help the amused smile that spreads on your lips. 

“Eddie, I’ve barely even started, and look at you.” You tease, his cock jolting in your hands. 

“Keep talking, princess.” He whispers, sounding almost desperate.

“You like when I talk?” You laugh. You start pumping slowly with your one hand, dragging back and forth over his hardness. “You just said you wanted me to be quiet.”

He shakes his head aggressively, eyes shutting.

“Like it when you talk, princess.” He moans.

You sit up straighter on your knees, bringing your mouth to his tip, licking just the head. His eyes shoot open, gaze immediately setting on you.

“You like that, Eddie?” You tease and he nods his head dumbly. “Want me to do it again?” He nods again.

You place a kiss to his tip, pulling back to watch his reaction but he doesn’t have any. In fact, he doesn’t even look like he’s breathing.

“Eddie, you gotta breathe, can’t have you passing out just from getting your dick sucked.” You taunt. His mouth opens, sucking in a breath, his chest rising and falling harshly as he lets it out. “Look at you, such a good listener tonight.” You laugh, his dick kicking up in your hand again. You shake your head in amusement before placing another kiss to his tip.

You pull away entirely, pushing yourself off your knees, moving to your bed. He’s clearly not fit for standing right now. 

When you sit, turning back to Eddie, he’s still standing in the middle of your room, hands brought to his face as he rubs aggressively.

“Eddie.” You call, getting his attention. He spins, pulling his hands away from his face, his bangs sticking up in all different directions. You pat the spot next to you and he’s quick to claim it. 

“That’s better isn’t it?” You say as he lays down, hair spanning over your pillow. 

“Better.” He says, voice cracking. 

You settle between his legs, mouth watering as you take him in your hand again. 

You dribble spit over the tip, letting it fall over the head before gathering it, spreading it with a twist of both hands up and down his cock. 

“Gonna let me use my mouth now, Eddie? Or are you still desperate to hear me talk?” You tease, gaze finding his blown out eyes.

He nods but you tut. 

“Wanna hear you say it, Eddie.” You coo, letting your eyes flicker over him. You stop your hand movements when he takes too long to reply.

“Princess, please put your mouth on my cock. Please.” He says, words practically a whine spilling from his lips. 

You nestle closer to him between his thighs, dipping your face, licking up the underside of his cock before opening your mouth and letting it hit against your tongue.

You watch him carefully, reveling in the way he’s falling apart for you. His chest rises and sinks in steady pants, mouth set agape, as his wide eyes watch your every move.

Closing your lips around him, you let him slide in just enough for you to swirl your tongue around his tip.

“Fuck” He groans. You hum, not missing the way his thighs clench as you do.

His hand finds your head, combing your hair back, resting his palm against the side of your face. Most guys start pushing on the back of your head, but Eddie doesn’t. 

Flattening your tongue, you take him deeper in your mouth, twisting your hands around him and meeting your mouth halfway up his length.

His other hand takes purchase on the mattress, knuckles turning white from how hard he’s gripping the comforter. It’s completely dichotomous to the gentle grip he holds on your face. It’s almost laughable. 

You bring your head up and down before pulling off with a pop, spitting on the tip again, making sure your hands glide slickly along his length. 

“Is that good, Eddie?” You ask before returning your mouth to his cock. Your added spit makes a slick, wet noise as you move your fists up and down on his length.

“Fuck, princess. S’really good.” He gasps breathily, his stomach tensing as your thumb wipes at the precum gathering on his tip.  

You smile before parting your lips, taking him back in your mouth.

You take him further this time, his cock hitting the back of your throat and he whimpers pitifully. You do it again and his fingertips press in the slightest bit harder against your face, still not pushing you, just translating his pleasure through his touch.

You hollow your cheeks, sinking harder and faster, bobbing your head. His fingers weave into your hair gently and it spurs you on. You take him deeper, relaxing your throat, letting him slide right in until your lips meet your fingers at his base.

When you do it again, you push yourself a little too hard, gagging yourself, sputtering as you rise. With a deep, broken moan Eddie’s hips follow your mouth, only settling back to the bed when you pull off of him with a gasp as you catch your breath. 

“Jesus Christ.” He whimpers under his breath.

You feel his cock pulsing in your fist, his hand tugging ever so gently on the roots of your hair and you start to think you might just like this too much. 

You take him in your mouth again, all the way back to your throat, removing your hands entirely until your nose nestles against the wispy hairs above his shaft.

You exploringly let your fingertips tiptoe to his balls, taking them in one hand, massaging them gently.

“F-fuck. Fuck.” Eddie groans, stomach tensing sharply, his thighs squeezing against you. 

You jerk your head on his cock, continuing to massaging his balls using the mess of wetness leaking down his shaft to help guide your skillful movements.

It’s not long before every bob of your head is being chased by the rise of his hips. He’s desperate for release, you both know it.

You flicker your eyes to him and he’s never looked more scattered. Bangs disheveled, cheeks rosy, brows pinched, half lidded eyes all dark and pleading, just for you. You do like it too much, you really, really do.

His gaze meets yours, flickering between you and your mouth.

“Doing so fucking good princess. Don’t stop. Please.” He whines. You hum contentedly, sinking onto him, hands still working his balls as they tense in your grasp. 

His hand in your hair starts to sting as he pulls at it but he still doesn’t push you, he wouldn’t do that unless you told him to, you’re sure of it now.

His moans and whimpers rise, getting higher and longer, composing a symphony just for you. It comes to a crescendo when you take him all the way to his base again. His hips rise from the mattress, cock choking you, and you swallow around him, making him cry out a desperate moan that simmers into a broken whimper.

You know he’s close. 

You hum to yourself, gulping him into your mouth, meeting his quick, uneven thrusts. 

“I’m g-gonna cum.” He says in a strangled moan. His hand in your hair tugs impossibly hard, trying to pull you from him but you don’t let him. He doesn’t make your decisions, you do. He should know better.

You quicken your pace, bobbing your head and working him in your hands. The obscene, slicked noises coming from your movements fill the room, accompanying his moans, and he breaks. 

For a moment, you watch him as he falls apart and it’s beautiful. Eyes rolling closed, face contorted in pleasure. It’s undeniably beautiful. You don’t let yourself drink in his beauty for too long though, that would be like admitting something and you wouldn’t do that so you refocus on the task at hand (and mouth).

Cum spurting to the back of your throat, you take him deeper a final time, swallowing it all down until you can’t. You pull up, feeling some leaking for the corners of your lips but you keep going, working him through his release as his cock throbs against your tongue. 

He cums so hard that he’s babbling different versions of praises intermixed with your name. Your real name. Not princess, and it takes you by surprise. 

“Fucking shit. F-Fuck.” He whimpers, hips sinking back to the mattress, stuttering. You slow your movements before pulling off of him with a satisfying ‘pop’. 

His cock is shiny, the cum that didn’t get swallowed, gathering around his base. You flicker your eyes to him and he’s watching you now with a glazed over stare. Dipping your mouth to him one last time, you lick up the pearly shine and he looks at you like he might explode. 

You pull away with a laugh, wiping your mouth. 

His body deflates, melting into the mattress as he throws his head back against the pillow, eyes squeezing shut.

“Holy shit.” He groans.

You shift in between his thighs, hands disgustingly wet and sticky so you reach up, wiping both of them down the front of his shirt, leaving behind the glistening wet print of 10 fingers on the black fabric. You expect him to say something but his eyes remain closed, breathing still heavy.

With a gap between the two of you, you lay down beside him, watching the rise and fall of his chest. Your eyes move up, taking in the rosiness of his face and the way it spreads down his neck. You even take the time to notice the delicate way his thick lashes lay atop his cheeks.

“You better not fall asleep here.” You sneer, shaking your head, forcing yourself to stop staring before he notices.

“Why not? Daddy’s not home is he?” He says, breathing still heavy.

“Don’t be a dick.” You retort. He pauses, sucking in a deep, steadying breath and letting it out.

“Pretty sure mine just melted off.” You see his smirk on his face, but his eyes remain closed.

“No, it’s still there unfortunately.” You say flatly, eyes flitting to his softening dick.

“Unfortunately?” He laughs.

“Yup.” You reply.

Eddie shifts the slightest bit, hand raising from his side as he blindly feels around the bed. When he touches your hip you try to swat him away but he grabs your hand, forcing his fingers to intertwine with yours.

“Gross, stop trying to hold my hand!” You shriek, holding back your laughter as you try to shake him off.

“Princess, let me hold your fucking hand. You just sucked the soul right out of me, I need this.” He says with a laugh, grasp getting stronger with each shake of your wrist. 

“You're so weird.” You say, hiding your amusement, trying to find any hint of malice to add to your words but it comes out meak.

Eddie lays there for a few minutes, your hand in his. You try to ignore his radiating warmth by thinking about the project you’re supposed to be doing with him but your eyes keep sinking to your hand in his. 

“What time should I pick you up tomorrow?” Eddie says, turning to face you, opening his eyes finally. His question startles you, taking you aback.

“What?” You laugh.

“For school. What time should I pick you up?” He says again, speaking to you like you’re a child.

“You’re not picking me up.” You state. It’s not up for debate.

“You’re not playing hooky tomorrow, and if I pick you up, I can be sure of it.” He says, like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. 

“You’re not picking me up.” You state again.

“Fine. I’ll sleep here tonight then tomorrow we can walk to school together.” He replies, tilting his face towards you and lifting his brows.

“You can't sleep here.” You object firmly.

“Princess.” He says warningly.

“Eddie.” You warn back. His eyes stare into you, making your stomach flutter with nerves. 

“I’m going to brush my teeth and wash my hands.” You say abruptly, pulling your hand from his.

“I’ll be here.” He sings teasingly.

“No. You. Won’t.” You reply stubbornly as you haul yourself off the bed and out of the room.

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

Nancy's words from earlier ring in your head. 

‘He gets worse.’

The game you play is shifting. The dance is speeding up. It makes your heart beat too fast and your stomach flutter dreadfully.

Maybe she was right. 

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

part 3 here

[coddda]

Hiiiiiii. Episode 25/26 lawlight analysis rant thingy here. I don't know how to write an intro for this so let's just get to it LOL

I think one of the reasons that the rain/foot scenes stick out so much (the. Sheer insanity of a Foot Massage Scene in an anime revolving around two guys trying to kill each other aside 💀) is the fact that the anime specifically suffers a bit in terms of adapting a few of the "emotional" moments in death note.

And I don't mean "emotionally impactful" exactly. For example I think the adaptations of scenes like Raye and Naomi's deaths were very impactful and the atmospheres of their final scenes were great, but I mean more from a characterization standpoint (if that makes sense). Being more focused on mind and logic games, Death Note as a whole isn't as invested in individual characters' deeper feelings as it is in its action (which isn't necessarily a criticism per say, it's simply part of the nature of a mystery thriller series). But just because they're fewer and farther between doesn't mean there are none at all. In the manga we do get to see, for example, how much Light actually cared for his family and especially Sayu, and how he actually felt more conflicted and suffered lack of sleep/appetite when he first used the Death Note.

The anime specifically as an adaptation is pretty good at adapting the main mind fuckery and action of Death Note, but its lacking in properly adapting scenes like the ones I mentioned above is a criticism I see somewhat often, and it's pretty fair imo. Compared to all the other adaptations, it certainly seems to fall short on an emotional level: the musical has entire songs going in depth about the characters feelings and relationships, the 2015 jdrama is. Insane and has its emotional moments in spades (because it's a TV drama, which are more focused on portraying emotional conflict and the like), even the 2006 movies has its emotional beats and L Change the WorLd is. Well. Oh Man.

Anime Light to a lot of people is like. Light but he's "already evil" (which I have my own thoughts on but I digress). Light but after using the Death Note for like 2 minutes he's already like "fuck yeah time to kill criminals". Basically the anime doesn't take as much time to delve into his less cynical sides or really delve into his already vague and harder to decipher feelings in general, he is noticeably colder from the get-go here, etc.

But that's part of why I think episode 25 manages to stand out so much tonally (apart from it being, y'know, the episode L literally Dies). I love the episode so much and could probably rant for hours about how much I love the artistic choices made in it but what I'm trying to get at here is that it's one of the very few moments where the show tries to go deeper into specific character's emotions, and one of the very few moments where the show Attempts (emphasis on "attempts" because, well, you'll see in a bit) to get more in-depth into Light's feelings apart from his cynicism/apathy/justice. ness.

L in these two scenes in episode 25 is, well, pretty damn open about how he feels. It's usually interpreted as him knowing that he's going to die, and you can see it. He visibly looks/sounds lost, somber, etc. He never really had much to hide around Light to begin with (since he doesn't really care about hiding himself the same way Light does) but especially not now and it Shows, and I personally thought it was pretty cool to delve into his thoughts/show how he feels this way. The somberness can be felt throughout the entire scene, even people who don't already know the plot of Death Note from the manga could probably tell that he's about to die.

In the manga, once L starts suspecting Misa again and Rem realizes what Light is trying to do, it goes straight to Watari and L's deaths, but the anime instead gives a distinct and unexpected pause in the middle of this where L contemplates his own death. It's fucking great, and the shift from straight action to slower emotional weight makes these scenes stand out a lot, since, like I said, the show usually focuses more on the former. But it's kind of ironic, too.

Not only does the anime open up L's feelings more in these scenes, but it also tries to dig deeper into Light's feelings as well through L. And it's really funny honestly because while, yes, these are the more "emotionally open" scenes of the anime Light still manages to be Incredibly avoidant and contribute almost nothing to the entire ordeal.

L is visibly upset -> "Yeah Ryuzaki, you're not making any sense at all" (Not addressing the obvious conflict from L)

"Tell me, Light. From the moment you were born, has there ever been a point where you've actually told the truth?" -> "[The most stale, over-explained, avoidant answer to a "yes/no" question that you could ever hear + blatant attempts to reframe the question]"

(L's half-smile here kills me) "I had a feeling you'd say something like that" -> [Nothing]

"I'm sorry" -> [Nothing]

"It'll be lonely won't it? You and I will be parting ways soon" -> [Nothing]

^ From this point Light continues to say literally Nothing for the rest of the scene. I'm not even joking, from then on the rest of Light's voicelines are reduced to nothing but vague noises of confusion.

Everytime L calls Light out as a person ("Has there ever been a point where you've actually told the truth?" / "I had a feeling you'd say something like that." / "Won't it be lonely?") he doesn't actually acknowledge anything. Out of those three lines, he only answers verbally to if he's ever told the truth, and even then it's the most blatantly people-pleasing answer ever, as it usually is with Light. And I don't think it's because Light just. Doesn't care about any of what L's saying at all, or that he doesn't know what the hell he's talking about (questioning Light's authenticity as a person, saying it would be lonely when they part), instead he's choosing not to acknowledge any of what this means about himself or him and L at all. He's like a fucking wall.

And like, for the truth question in particular, the show makes sure that you know it's not something that Light just. Doesn't care enough about to answer. The hard cuts to silence are a very rare but extremely effective way that the show conveys an extremely important moment (see: Light regaining his memories, Matsuda noticing Light opening the warehouse door before he escapes (not as much of a "direct" cut to silence but still)), and cuts to multiple angles/framings/zooms of the exact same shot are also used for the same purpose (see: Light hugging Misa when she was crying, Matsuda aiming his gun to shoot Light, Light regaining his memories Again). Just like the scene where Light gets his memories back, the moment L's question finishes the show utilizes both. That question cut Deep. There's is a solid Almost 5 seconds of silence before the sound of the rain gradually starts fading back in, and honestly that should be telling enough as is (but of course Light doesn't actually admit that. Or anything at all really, so). Oh also another fun detail! We do not see Light's face At All (except for the shot where you can see his mouth moving but not his eyes), for the Entire time that he's going on his spiel to L. We Will Be Revisiting This Later, by the way. This is not, in fact, the first time you're going to see this detail from Light.

The only sort of reciprocation that we see from Light during Any of these two scenes is when Light dries L's hair while L dries his feet. Biblical meanings/references aside it's interesting because it's the only time he directly does anything "for" L in these scenes, but even then he doesn't try to pass it off as anything meaningful really the same way L does ("You're still soaked", a purely neutral and factual statement. It doesn't Add Anything compared to L's. Sin atonement loneliness grieving stuff. While Light is showing his own reciprocation to this more personal moment he also tries to keep it impersonal enough that it doesn't actually have to mean anything deep). And when L says "I'm sorry" after he once again gets no response from Light. It's also after this that L gets that pained look on his face, like he knows that at this point he's not actually going to get anything meaningful from Light (again, very significant and rare from L in the show. We've seen him in distress (see: when Ukita died, hell, when Watari dies), but even then he mostly manages to keep his usually neutral expression), we never see him "look sad" like he does here):

I just think it's interesting that this is one of the few scenes in this particular adaptation of Death Note where they try to open up the character's thoughts/feeling (especially considering the fact that they. lowkey blunder in adaptations of original scenes from the manga), and L himself is being rather open (not that he ever really tries to hide what he thinks nearly as much as Light), and yet all Light contributes to it in return is like. Actually nothing. Bro fumbled it. There is no resolution to any of this, to any of what L asks at all, to any of the many opportunities for a meaningful conversation, and the only thing even relatively close to an answer that you can get from Light is what you can infer from how he acts in the episode after L dies, where he's just going through the motions, but hardly acting as if he's actually living at all.

(Honestly I think the transition from this scene with the taskforce to the subsequent scene with Misa says enough on its own. Light's expressions and tone says everything:)

(Oh sidenote but. This shit again:

"Light, this is our first date in forever. can't you enjoy yourself a little more?" ('Why don't you seem happy? We can finally be together since L is dead') -> No response, Light instead changing the topic to him wanting to move in with Misa without changing his mannerisms at all

Also there's that one detail again. You pretty much don't see Light's expression when he speaks here at all, except for one shot of his eyes, which is quite literally the exact same shot they used when he "saw" L, just altered for the new setting. You have No idea what he looks like when he's responding to Misa, although it's probably fair to assume that it's the same empty stare he has for the whole Two Shots where you can clearly see his whole expression in the entire scene.

Something something Light Yagami bad at feelings I think you get the point though)

I guess Light's Kind of showing what he's feeling now? He'll admit to himself that it's boring without L, but no more than that. Light never actually admits to anything "significant", and L's dead already anyway, so what would that even do?

And then we get, uh. Basically nothing from Light. For the next 5 Years. Except that he joined the NPA, so, uh, yay? Good job, Light you totally nailed it! Thank you for allowing us as an audience to delve deeper into your inner thoughts and feelings as a character so we can find out more about you as a person! Very helpful! Thank you for not sabotaging one of your few dedicated opportunities to look into yourself as a person and reflect on your relationships with others and being 100% honest with yourself! We stay winning guys.

Anyway, this got way too long for a scene that's over a decade old, and I've probably just said everything that everyone else has already said in this fandom before. But unfortunately this has been living in my head for way too long and I must scream. I just think this episode's neat is all :)

tl;dr Part of the reason why the rain/foot scene (tbh episode 25 in General) stands out so much is because the Death Note anime specifically was a bit robbed in terms of its more emotional character moments compared to the other medias, which makes more somber/introspective scenes like the ones in episode 25 stand out a Lot in comparison. But it's also incredibly ironic because it's one of the few moments where the show (or specifically L) tries to look deeper into Light's character, but because he is so avoidant for the entire duration of these two scenes he adds basically nothing at all. It's almost funny. Mostly sad. It's also very gay. Aand post

Okay actually nevermind one more thing I talked about how the jdrama is supposed to be more emotionally in-depth because it is a TV Drama and just for the record, same thing happens there! I could probably do an entire analysis of the Blue Scene in this context like I did with episode 25 but I'd literally be here forever, so uh, just take this iconic line as my main example:

Same Thing. L's statement "I wish we could have met some other way" is personal. It's his own wish, his own regret that he is expressing to Light. While Light's reply obviously has that same regret implied it's also phrased in a specifically impersonal way. It's closed off. "This is the only way we could have met" it closes off the topic and simply renders L's wish as ultimately futile. Light does not say that he Also wishes he could have met L a different way even if it was likely impossible, instead it's a cold statement of cynical fact.

Idk just. Something something L being able and Willing to be more openly sentimental/emotionally open towards Light/about Light vs. Light's inability to be honest with anyone including himself and his own nature preventing any form of meaningful reciprocation. Something something self-sabotage, y'know the drill. God don't even get me Started on how sincere L's tone is when he says "It'll be lonely won't it?"(at least in the eng dub) in the anime I could talk about his tone in that scene for ages. Also yes all of this relates to L Change the WorLd too by the way. Don't ask how it just does okay.

I do think that scenes like these (rain/foot scene, The Blue Scene. Uh. L Change the WorLd The Novel Adaptation) show, at least in those adaptations, that L does genuinely care for Light, and show that he values him as a friend not just in the mindgame-equal sense but also just like, a more sincere sense you know. Idk if that made any sense and that's a whole other topic for another day but you guys just have to believe me on this one alright please please believe me buries head in hands. Okay post over finally thanks for coming to my tedtalk hope you enjoyed my very-unnecessarily long analysis of the week

[stormblessed95]

Who Thoughts and Theories

First, it's such a good song. I'm genuinely so in love with it, with Jimins vocals, with his dance, with his backup dancers. I'm so impressed with how hard he worked and all the choices he contributed to it. While this is the only song on the album that Jimin doesn't have writing credits on, he was still very much involved in every aspect of the songs creation and it was written with the feelings Jimin wished to portray. I talk briefly about what I believe the overall feelings that Jimin was trying to express in the album Muse, here:

And of course because you should refresh yourself on the song and get that extra stream in before you read....

I'll otherwise just be talking about what I think, my thoughts, my feelings and my theories about Who, the song and the MV in this post. These are of course just my opinions, coming from my perspectives. You are free to agree or disagree as much as you want.

First, I want to say that regardless of the pronouns used in the song, I don't think it has any bearing on Jimins sexuality. People (read: homophobes) cannot use this song as a way to try to say Jimin can't be queer. Not only is that nonsensical and ignoring the fact that Jimin would be closeted if he is queer. But it's also ignoring the way Jimin speaks about the song, which is solely in gender neutral terms. From the original lyrics being "you" instead of "she."

To the way he says "people" instead of "girls/women" about the scene where people walk past him as the options of who he could be looking for. Along with the fact that the billboard with a man's eyes drop right after he sings "who is my heart Waiting for?"

The way that Jimin dances with both men and women and the scene then when they come together, it's absolutely giving west side story. Which is my personal opinion. Which one of the themes of west side story is love striving to rise above the hatred.... And idk about you, but I think that can easily relate to queer love as well. But again, personal opinion only! So this BS that I know everyone rolled their eyes at with the "this proved he is straight" nonsense, is at its core.... Nonsense...

Speaking of his dance, this thread has absolutely nothing to do with what I'll talk about in this post but is so cool and FULL of Jimin appreciation and you should check it out if you want!

Jimin switched aspect ratios of film during his MV of Who. An ARMY linked together all the times he changed ratios, which you can watch here:

As well as going through multiple different types of media: television, comic strips, movie, billboards, etc. Jimin is showing us multiple different storylines within his MV. This same person from above goes into great detail about how all this can show the various details of storylines and storytelling. It's a good read, worth checking out

It's super interesting the way the words play across the screen during certain parts of the MV and how it changes the screen ratios as well. I would love an actual interpretation from Jimin or the MV director over what they actually mean or if it was just in the 90s theme with zero correlation or meanings, but I doubt we will ever get that. So all we can do is guess and make our own interpretations. Which will be affected by our own personal biases. That's the beauty of art though!

The ones I'll point out that I'll say something about are:

Play, both in the corners at times and on the little TV's around the MV

Auto calibration, with the burning wrecked car, where the words flash quickly across the screen at the bottom, right before hand too, the screen ratio had changed again too. And it changes again as he does his partner choreo with the girl

Rewind, which appears during the bridge. Right after the billboard falls and the screen ratio had changed again

And then pause at the very end before the whole screen cuts.... And then we get the end screen with the words play again, basically looping the video, and the Smeraldo Flower

So let's talk about it!

It's interesting that the video basically loops, it's really giving storytelling. Jimin being an actor basically. "Play" being inside the story for the most part. And it's interesting that those parts happen right before a lot of the partnering choreo too. Auto calibration means bringing something back into an acceptable range. Which if we relate this at all to queerness, it's absolutely giving "don't stray too far out of that closet." And it does happen right after Jimin dances with men, before dancing with the woman again. And play is back in the little TV's. It's giving, trying to be perfect and fit into expectations and be in the perfect storybook. And at the end, Jimin is left behind by all the dancers and the billboard drops at "who is my heart Waiting for" and it's clearer and clearer that it really is most likely JKs eyes. If not, it's absolutely a man's eyes and that is screaming queer energy. And even if it is just a promo of some kind, since we don't know the connection between the eyes, JK, "keep going" and AYS yet, it's WILD to put Jikook promo in this type of love song. And yet, these are the two that publicly claimed the song serendipity as theirs. So it tracks.

And when we get to rewind, it's at the same time as he is talking about "people" walking by him as potentials for his perfect match, as well as how he is not able to "match" any of the women he attempts to meet with through dance in his short walk. It is also right after that billboard with ?Jungkook? drops too. Interesting. Trying to get back into the original story perhaps? Perhaps it's not working so well?

Pause. Off. Smeraldo Flower which represents the Truth Untold.... Speaking yourself. Loving yourself. Being true to who you are..... Which is maybe not what was the perfect story that was being depicted through the MV. Who knows! But that is the end. Just to loop around and start again with Play. Where he literally tells us with Muse to "please misunderstand." Again, just interesting. And if you are following my thoughts here, you already know why that is "interesting."

It's giving closeted queer energy and it's giving I like people, not genders and it's giving love.

Which brings me to the very LAST thing I want to talk about. Sorry, I know this is already SO LONG. Jimin is singing amongst natural disasters. So did V and JK actually too. They are singing about declaring love in the middle of some kind of disaster. And I can't stop thinking about that honestly.

It's giving peak grand gesture kinda romance. It's giving intimacy found between two people in love no matter where they are or how loud the world might be around them. It's giving raw and honest declarations of intent and love type vibes. And i just love that they are into and going for that exaggerated confession scene and storybook kinda romance. It's absolutely tracks for who they are as people and the romance they've all talked about wanting too. And who else do we know who always seems to like doing grand gesture type romantic BS for someone else?

Anyway! This is the feeling that people write epic romances about. Your favorite ships? It's the same type of feeling that's inspired here. Let me try to explain this in some kinda way....

It's a trope. "Love conquers all" where it doesn't matter what life throws at you. All the trials, the tribulations, the natural disasters, the normal disasters, any and all shortcomings or failures you might face in life.... The moment of being with the one you love? Of being vulnerable and baring your soul with another person who means the world to you? Making sure they understand how much they mean to you and how much you love them? That's always going to be the most important thing and moment. That is the significance of the intimacy and the romance displayed.

It's the peak, idealistic version of the best relationship you could find yourself in. Nothing and no one matters more than the moments you create with your loved one, even in the middle of a raging horrific apocalyptic disaster ridden world.

And how sometimes, just building up to that confession can make things feel like a horrific apocalyptic disaster ridden world, until you confess. And you let those feelings out. And it's okay. All those disasters quiet down, maybe you even start to enjoy the rain. It was your emotions all along. And then you discover that hey, maybe the reason I'm feeling so calm now is actually BECAUSE of this person I love. Being with them calms my mind, brings me safety, happiness and joy.

Sometimes, in the middle of all the madness and chaos of the world... You are only minutes away from finding that moment with that person that's going to give you something infinite. Something that no natural disaster can destroy or take away from you. Something, and/or someone, so precious.

And there is something so beautiful in depicting this in their love songs. It's inspirational. As well as humorous in regards to Seven. Lol

I'll just finish this off with a link to this twitter user as this moment just came out, and it's about rebirth, but I do low-key agree with them here 😂

And anyway, that was my essay! Lol if you read all of this. Bless you and thank you! You are appreciated! A reminder that this is all just personal opinions. You are free to agree or disagree as you choose!

[life-is-unreal]

Stranger Danger~ {Genshin x Reader} Teyavat Chapter 14 - Teardrop Crystal

slight spoiler : There's probably going to be a slime army :D, which slime for Liyue I wonderrrr :DDD

"Welcome back!" Venti's eyes glimmered under the bar lights. "Ah, this is the Holy Lyre! You managed to retrieve it!"

"The pattern of flowing wind carved on the rosewood... and the strings still feel cool to the touch too. Oh, the memories..." You rolled your eyes. Anyone with an actual brain could tell what's wrong with his words. 

Jean exchanged a glance with you. Barely shaking her head. "What do you think, Venti? Can you summon Dvalin?"

Venti shrugged, spreading his hands, "Although this lyre is the real thing, I doubt that it's going to work. As you can see, the lyre has been through a thousand years of history. Its Anemo power has run dry. In this condition, you couldn't play music fit for even Diluc's tavern with it..."

Diluc frowned, "Bards fight to get on the stage of my tavern. Don't make assumptions!" 

Paimon gaped at him in disbelief, "Is that really important right now, Master Diluc!? And you - did you just borrow the Holy Lyre to play music for drunkards to hear?"

"Hehe."

Paimon's eyes widened in a cartoon like way, "What do you mean "hehe"!?"

"Anyway, we won't be able to call Dvalin with it." You sniggered at Aether's expression, if you didn't know the plot before hand, you would've slapped Venti.

Venti hurriedly changed his words upon Aether's emotionless face. "The lyre itself is fine, but the strings..."

You patted Aether's shoulder, "Time for you to do your lil magic."

"M-me?"

“He never said that it was broken."

He nodded, "It's just that the anemo power is diminished."

You leaned to Aether's ear, "Use the tear drop thingy."

His eyes widened, "I- I never told you about that." He hissed.

You fluttered your eyelashes, "Shut up and do it."

Venti grinned, "It worked, as expected. 

"This youthful glow..." Jean muttered.

"Praising yourself?" Paimon gasped flabbergasted.

"It's not just a youthful glow, it fucking changed colors." You commented.

Jean raised a brow, "KEUGH KEUGH I said nothing." You waved your hands.

She sighed in exasperation, "...I was talking about the Holy Lyre."

"Thanks to Aether having purified the crystal, the Holy Lyre won't continue to lose power. That said, its power is far from replenished. It'd be great if we could get more tears."

"We'll-"

"Wait." Your eyebrows furrowed. "Jean, you didn't pay us yet."

Paimon slapped her forehead. "Oh yeah! Paimon forgot about that too!"

"Oh and we rented out a place instead of going to the inn..." you smiled largely.

Jean smiled lightly, "I'll send all of the rewards after Dvalin no longer threatens Mondstadt."

"Then the water bodies..." you wiggled your eyebrows, sparkles in your eyes.

"After Albedo finishes his experimentations."

"Ok, we'll help."

Venti's eyes remained unfocused, "Suffering alone in some deserted place..." he muttered.

"Dvalin..."

Paimon's expression turned from confusion to sadness, "Poor baby..."

"This is not something that an Honorary Knight and Y/N can accomplish alone. I will mobilize the rest of knights to assist. When you get the Teardrop Crystal, please let Aether perform the purification process."

"Leave it to me."

"Heroes supporting each other and setting out on a journey together... How exciting! Lemme come up with a song for you..." 

You and Paimon side eyed him. "Is that all you're going to do? Just sing?" Paimon screeched.

"Wouldn't be much of a bard if I didn't now, would I?"

"Hmph. You're so cheeky...You deserve an ugly nickname." Paimon, nooo, stop giving people that can one shot us ugly nicknames..."Oh, Paimon knows! From now on, you'll be known as 'Tone-Deaf Bard'!"

-.-.-

(Thousand Winds Temple)

"The ruin guards aren't attacking us..." Paimon scratched her head. "OH YEAH! It's Y/N's ability!"

A strange expression emerged on Diluc's face before returning back to normal.

You coughed slightly, "I think ya'll need to kill it though, how else are you going to get that crystal?"

Jean turned to you. "Y/N, do you want to try?"

"M-me?"

"Yes, I've been wondering how it would react when you attack it." Strong curiosity could be seen through her cerulean eyes.

"But-"

"I'll pay for your rent until you leave."

"Sure!"

Your catalyst appeared besides you.

Aether gaped at you, "Where did you get that?!"

You smirked, "It's called having friends."

It didn't take too long for your smile to drop. "Oh fuck I can barely even fight. What if I fucking die?" You dragged your legs behind you.

Taking a deep breath, a ball of Anemo appeared in your hands.

The ruin guard stared down at you, as if frozen in place. As the ball of Anemo became larger and larger, you felt horrified when you noticed that it wouldn't stop.

"Y/N! That's enough to knock him out!" Aether yelled, he had no idea why you were suddenly so strong, the Anemo ball was stronger than his tornado, his eyes widened as it slowly grew to be twice your size. 

Jean frowned. "Is this her first time?"

Aether paused. "I have no idea but she's definitely never summoned such a large ball."

Jean's eyes narrowed, "I'll have to knock her out if she can't control it, she'll end up in a coma if this continues, she'll also create a large enough storm to cover up the whole of Mondstadt if this Anemo ball continues increasing."

The ruin guard stared down at you. "HELP ME!" You screamed, your hair covering your face. You could feel the large amount of Anemo gathering in your body. In a blue screen that only you could see, you noticed your experience increasing in large amounts.

It was a good thing but you felt chills on your spine, you were going to faint by the enormous amount of energy roaring inside of you. It felt refreshing, but in contrast you could feel your body getting tired. You might die if this continues on.

Suddenly, you felt your body getting lighter. Lifting your head, you noticed that the ruin guard slowly walked towards the Anemo ball. As its arm touched the ball, you felt yourself regaining control of the elemental energy. 

"Is it, killing itself?" Paimon shrieked. 

The machine continued to walk towards you, its gears getting ripped and turned into metal dust by the reckless energy.

You panted, staggering as the entire ruin guard turned into metal dust before disappearing, a precious chest dropping in its place.

"That was unexpected." Diluc's questioning gaze landed on you before striding towards the chest.

"To sacrifice itself so that you wouldn't be depleted of elemental energy. This... is indeed very unexpected. Your pet slimes don't even seem as odd now that I think of it." Jean handed you a potion.

"This will replenish the lost energy in your body. Sucrose created the formula by accident. I'll introduce you to her soon. Sorry for almost knocking you out." 

"It's fine. I didn't expect this too."

"I'll bring you to Albedo when he comes back with results with the samples across Mondstadt."

"Sorry, but umm... Paimon has been wondering since yesterday, what are you guys talking about?" Paimon giggled nervously.

"Oh? Is there a problem with Mondstadt's water? I was wondering why I saw Kaeya near the Dawn Winery." 

Remembering the sample of water that Keyarye 'accidentally' dropped, a small bottle appeared in your hands. The moment you returned back home, you had split the sample of the concentrated substance in portions. You were going to give one of them to Albedo but he was probably cooped up somewhere doing experiments.

"Oh yeah! I almost forgot. You might want to give this to Albedo, he can compare it to other samples." The concentrated liquid wasn't like the diluted samples, it looked like water but to the keen eye, some differences could be spotted. From the minty tint to the light sweet smell.

"Thank you Y/N." Obviously, Jean noticed the differences, hopefully she'd give you a raise.

Clearing your throat, "Did you guys seriously not notice how all the plants around the lakes look kinda wilted and how there's less and less fish? Why'd you think a bunch of knights gathered samples of the water bodies. And come on Aether! You legit go out every single day. How brain dead are you?"

Paimon coughed, "Anywayyyy, Paimon didn't think we'd find Dvalin's tears in a place like this."

"As knights, we are taught to hone our investigative skills."

"And I ended up in prison because three knights thought I was a spy." You grumbled.

Jean sighed, holding her head. "I'll double your pay if you stop talking about that during work."

Your eyes sparkled in joy, "Ok Grandmaster!

-.-.-

(Whispering woods)

"Jean...has a turtle..." Paimon whispered dazed. "Diluc...has a turtle?...too?!"

"Paimon... Are you ok?" You poked her tummy. "Paimon... You gained weight again."

Paimon turned to you, her eyes unfocused, "Hey Y/N, did you have a pet turtle when you were young?"

"Yeah. I had...five or something but they all died because of sickness. Maybe something else."

"Y/N... had five turtles.... turtles...Ehehehe, turtles..."

Your face scrunched up. "She's..."

"Yeah, let's ignore her. Let her be in her lil world." Aether muttered. Yup, Aether sounded more and more like a Gen Z through your influence.

[229zmi]

NOTE EXCHANGE

PAIRING: Tsukishima Kei/Reader

CONTENT: note-passing, reader calls tsukishima babygirl

WORD COUNT: 0.9k

You remember the first time you saw Tsukishima. It was during one of his volleyball practices; you were simply taking a stroll when you noticed the door to the gym building was wide open and then decided to adhere to your human instinct that was nosiness by sticking your head inside. Though you weren’t — and still aren’t — well-acquainted with the mechanics of volleyball or whatever, he looked pretty cool the one (1) time you witnessed him block the ball before you hurried away to the nearest vending machine to bully some snacks out of it.

Then you remember talking to him for the first time — or rather, attempting to. Really, you try not to think about the interaction that much because it gives you second-hand embarrassment looking back on your past self, who, you aren’t sure how but somehow, had developed something of a crush on Tsukishima. (Ew! Yuck! Blegh!)

“Excuse me?” you whispered to him. He sat only a few feet away in front of you, so you figured he’d be able to hear you just fine, and if he was any closer, you were sure he’d be able to hear your heartbeat racing. “Could you help me with this question, I don’t und—“

Without even sparing a glance at you, Tsukishima replied curtly, interrupting the middle of your sentence, “Ms. Sato would be more than willing to help you.”

You cringed a bit but quickly recovered as much of your dignity as you could and did as told, standing up from your desk. He seems to think he’s the shit for whatever reason, you thought to yourself as you made your way toward the teacher’s table. What an insufferable scrub, you continued to bitterly muse.

But next you remember, a few weeks later, being assigned as partners for some project in school and visiting his house to work on said project. You remember meeting his family, how you were greeted with such great hospitality that it almost made you queasy; remember the days where you’d prolonged your stay for so long that his mom made him walk you home just to be safe and eventually the days where you were invited over even when there was no longer a project to work on.

You remember when everything finally clicked into place, when he was no longer an insufferable scrub to you and you were no longer like a rash on his arm, a stressful presence in his life, as Tsukishima so kindly told you once, that stayed around just because of the fact that his mom thought you were kind of funny.

The word relationship tasted strange on your tongue for the longest time, but you got over it anyway.

And now you’re in class, sharing AirPods — one in your ear and the other in his. In your ideal world, you would’ve been sharing wired earbuds, perhaps on a bus or train, to fulfill your Pinterest couple dreams, but given the two of you are in the middle of a lesson, you suppose that this is as romantic it’s gonna get.

Even so, you fixate your eyes on him, giving him a placid stare as the new song blares in your ear. Tsukishima, for some reason, pretends not to notice this, deciding to instead focus on writing down notes.

In a moment of silent rage, you tear off a large piece of your notebook paper and begin scribbling something on it. Once you decide you’re done, you crush it into a ball, extend your arm outward to your right, and drop the note on Tsukishima’s desk, all while making intense eye contact with the words written on the chalkboard up front as if that indicates you’re paying attention. You’re only lucky that the teacher’s attention isn’t on the class at the moment.

Tentatively, Tsukishima flattens the piece of paper out of its wrinkles with the palm of his hand, smoothing it once and then twice before reading its contents.

Can you change the song plz ♡ xoxo [Y/N]

He glances back at you, giving you a questioning look. You’re not sure why because you think your message was clear enough by itself. Regardless, you respond by pointing to your ear, distaste written all across your face. Tsukishima’s gaze doesn’t waver until you blow him a silent yet dramatic kiss.

Trying his best to ignore the immediate reddening of the tips of his ears, he writes something down in response to your note. After a few moments, he crumples the paper and tosses it onto your desk in a much more discreet manner than the way you did it.

Why?

Not too long passes before you send it back.

This song is an earsore ♡♡

Forgetting for a brief moment that he’s in class, he audibly sighs. The teacher shoots him a glare, which he ignores.

Not that I don’t agree with you, but I can’t change the song right now. My phone is in my backpack. It’ll be too obvious.

Booooo you SUCK!!!! ♡♡♡

You’re going to eventually fill up the page if you keep adding so many hearts.

Live with it babygirl my love for you has no limits ♡

You carefully watch his reaction as he reads your last message. Finally, with another annoyed sigh, he reaches into his backpack, and a couple more seconds pass when you hear the beginning of a new song.

Don’t say things like that. You were right though, that song was getting unbearable.

No you changed it cuz you love me ♡♡♡

His reply arrives after some minutes, for no apparent reason.

Maybe. ♥︎

You look up and Tsukishima’s smiling at you — faintly, but it’s definitely there, vanishing off his face almost as soon as you see it. Perhaps you’re still like a stressful rash on his arm, but if he has to be honest, he wouldn’t have it any other way.

[professional-bulshitter]

just went back to watching community again and I cant-

so this time it's about 'Regional Holiday Music' 3x10,, and adhagsjjsb it's so fucking good because in a manner it sort of addresses all the wants of the characters right? because to convince them to join the Glee club they need to be incentivised and the incentive in this case is what's so interesting to me:

because 1. it starts with Abed and we all know Abed and how he's all he wants is to be together and loved and he chases the belongingness that he didn't find before in the study group right? but also literally the only thing that cory had to do to get him on board was talk about making him and his friends feel better and be together,,, but also it's literally because media of any kind be it behind the screens or people singing is so much simpler for him to understand cause they are catered and made in such a way that they are easy to perceive and take in without it being more complicated and involving other people's feelings in it

which is Great on its own but the second person to get 'caught' is Troy (because obv Troy will follow Abed wherever he goes, because even when he can't follow he'll wait for Abed to come back to him and tell him about his side quests or just be there for him, but I digress-) but also it's because there's this one thing he's always wanted to be a part of and could never but then comes Abed giving it to him on a silver platter and letting him do the things he wants even if it is by providing him with a loophole

and then third is pierce who even though I loathe him, i do understand (ish) because at the end of the day he's a man out of time and place, he's within people he doesn't understand and who don't want to understand him because all he wants to do is relive his glory days instead of rooting himself in the present (which in large part the study group help him with) (he'll never be my favourite character or even a liked one but I see him and I feel sad because of what he is and always will be and the way he came to be this way) all he ultimately wants is to be 'cool' maong his peers even though both of them operate on different understandings of cool (and yeahhhh)

fourth is Annie which, is very very weird to me because we never really get to know what her song was, what her one wish/incentive was,,, but also is it really that hard to assume that she would cave in when confronted by one of the first few people that she could safely feel as if in the company of friends with? also and this is a straight up hypothesis but I do feel that Annie didn't really get a song to convince her because it wasn't that hard to do it because it didn't really matter because at the end of the day it started with Abed telling her that he stayed for that experiment despite being angry because she was his friend,, and this was her way if reciprocating that (because it was just that given, be ause some things don't need to be explicitly stated to be explicit) (but then why did troy have one? because he was technically going against his entire belief system and the way he identified and looked at himself and that is life changing in some manners and he was still the second one and yeah)... maybe

the fifth one was Shirley and this one is rather simpler because at the end of the day, she traces and finds herself within her belief system rooted in Christianity (which while not for mez i can understand the way belief systems can be very all or nothing for some people) and she just wanted to educate and empower children and people with things that she herself feels empowered by (she goes about it entirely the wrong way ofc because forcing religion on others is never an answer but I don't think nad never have that she's coming at it from a malicious position or intention

then we have jeff and like Annie it's very curious that he doesn't get something that he wishes to incentivise him (at least that's the way I understand that episode) instead, we get to see what Annie and further the audience thinks or is supposed to think about Jeff. He's still that impenetrable (hehehe) person that no-one can actually understand because yes he's an asshole but he's constructed in a very stereotypic asshole kind of way so that's all we get to see from him at that point in time (that's all we're supposed to perceive him as which is why unlike others he never joins in on the song) instead all we get is that he also succumbed somehow. but we're never told what made him submit and give in,, we're always made to look at him from a distance (at least till that point in time and show trajectory) and he might be the main centre of the show (ish arguably more around Abed but plot more centered around him (also I'm very very biased cause I deeply resonate with Abed)) and yeah

and then Britta who again doesn't get a song at all because,, and again throwing arrows in the dark here,,, ofc she has a bad voice and narrative voice isn't really imp to Cory and his performance but also because much like Jeff, there's an induced sense of distance, wherein she technically is supposed to be the main female protag at that point (at least that's the intention it seems to have started with) but in many manners, she's reduced to just that, they make her dumb and so unlike the other main heroines (and I will never not be angry with the way they changed her character post season 1) that at the end of the day that's all she ends up being (again till that point in the show's trajectory)

and yeah ,, and then then at the end of everything, Abed gives up on what he wanted for the group as a whole because he realises that this is not actually happiness that it's creating in everyone, because it's forcing them into roles that they've been tricked into and that's never what he wanted,,, yes he wants them to be together but not at the cost of the happiness of even one of them or all of them and yeah

also anyone that says community is just a silly little show, it is. But it's also so much more because the way it talks about created families and families of choice and being an outsider and trying to find belongingness,,, and in the end finding a place that lets you be the trainwreck that you are and helps you embrace it, is insane and great. And I love the way community as a whole does all of that while feeling so organic and experimental but also insightful and a well thought out piece of media with actual things to say and yeah

(also very unconnected to anything I've just said but I truly despise Shirley's song with everything in me,, I'd ironically and unironically listen to all of the rest of the songs in this episode but not that one (yes including whatever was going on with that Annie mean girls esque but make it worse and yeah)(they are bops honestly 🤷‍♀️)

i will go now but yeah I love community (also also last thing but this is the only way that I'll ever be able to fully digest random musicals in any show because community just does it better, I said what I said.)

[atamascolily]

The curious incident of the elephant in the night parade

The Rebellion Production Note includes a sketch of the "pumpkin carriage" that Sayaka and Nagisa ride in as emissaries of the Law of Cycles, which is good because we barely get to see it in the actual movie.

From face on, it's hard to see that there is, in fact, a pumpkin there, because it gets overshadowed by the pink circle behind it. The profile shot is not much better because Madokami's body blocks most of it.

(side note: love how the original Walpurgisncht pennants are re-imagined here, since Madokami moves under her own power instead of being towed.)

I also completely missed the cute little Pyotr (Nagisa's mouse-like familiar) on top!

The pumpkin is an obvious fairy tale reference and an allusion to Homura identifying herself as "the pumpkin" in the Cake Song. In the accompanying text, Inu Curry says that its color should be the same as the one in the Cake Song, but that changed somewhere in the animation process, because the carriage is orange and the Cake Song pumpkin is primarily green. Or is the carriage orange now because the squash has "ripened"? (for what it's worth, there are plenty of kabocha varieties that are green when ready to eat, so IDK if that's why, but it's the only thing I can think of off the top of my head).

Oh, and weirdly, there doesn't seem to be an obvious "door" to the carriage--even if it's folded up/not visible while in motion, it's striking that the window we do see is similar to the same window that has served as a symbolic representation of salvation via the Law of Cycles from the very first scene of the movie. Inu Curry's notes say that the window frame is white, just like that other window.

I had originally wondered why this carriage was necessary, since Madokami was theoretically only going to take Homura's soul away, not her physical body, but based on what happens to Sayaka in the ending of the original series, magical girls claimed by the Law of Cycles can vanish completely (body and soul), probably so they don't leave any unsightly corpses behind, although there appears to be some inconsistencies about this in Episode 12. But the carriage is such a great metaphor, I can't even bring myself to quibble about stuff like that.

So does Homura gets a carriage ride with an escort instead of flying off hand in hand with Madoka, because she's special--or does every magical girl get this treatment now? It doesn't really matter because Homura has her own ideas, but either way, it was a nice thought, I guess? Once again, Shaft goes for "what looks cool in the moment" rather than visual consistency.

In keeping with my ongoing obsession with the "peacock's tail" emblem that keeps popping up, I'll just say that the elephant's tail is the same shape and the knob on its harness has part of the same pattern... which does make sense because Walpurgisnacht uses that motif and this her repurposed elephant familiar.

However, there are some noticeable differences between the original elephant and this new version:

Walpurgisnacht's elephants from the original series and the Eternal recap movie have a different symbol on their sides - a sun-like drawing vs. the circle with cross quarters. There is a cryptic note here that I don't fully understand that says something like "emblem of the window god"--presumably Madokami?--but I'm not confident enough to say for certain what's going on here.

The ears are also different--the original elephant has a plain green ear, while the Rebellion version has a black and white series of diamonds with circles inscribed within them--another one of Homura's motifs, at least in the Rebellion Production Note.

Preliminary designs for Devil Homura's salamander motif featuring the same "diamond with inscribed circle" symbol.

Finally, both elephants' eyes are covered with "button-like" blinders, just like the horse on Homura's boat in the middle part of Rebellion.

Elephants are a symbol of wisdom, so the fact that they're blindfolded here is interesting; there's also the saying "an elephant never forgets" which seems pertinent in light of Rebellion's emphasis on memories. They are also a traditional vāhana ("mount" or "vehicle") of deities in Hindu and Buddhist iconography, which again fits with the mandalas and other symbols of divinity that Madokami and Walpurgisnacht share. However, I should point out that here that in this case, no one is directly riding on the elephant, as is usually traditional in these genres of religious art; the elephant is towing the vehicle intended for Homura's enlightenment/ascension/release and Madokami is not dependent on it for her movements. So, lots to unpack there.

(Also, if I'm reading the Japanese text right in the Rebellion Production Note, Sayaka wanted to use a helicopter instead, can you imagine?)

Another page in the Production Note shows the original design for the carriage, and I'm sad it got cut because it was rad as hell:

Sayaka, rolling up to Homura in this thing: "Get in, loser, we're going to magical girl heaven." *screeching tires*

The title of this post is an allusion to "the curious incident of the dog in the night-time" from one of the Sherlock Holmes stories and the "Night Parade of 100 Demons" (Hyakki Yagyō, 百鬼夜行) from Japanese folklore, which parallels Walpurgisnacht's original circus and this smaller remixed version in Rebellion.

[wonderfulworldofmichaelford]

Michael Before Midnight: "Houdini" by Eminem

Eminem is one of the most controversial rappers of all time, and this reputation isn’t entirely undeserved. I mean, the man has an entire song that’s just six straight minutes of him acting out violently murdering his ex. Uncontroversial artists do not make songs like that. But I think people do give him a lot of shit and really try to underplay his genuine talent too, mainly because of how a lot of his work just hasn’t aged great.

You have to understand the time and place Em rose out of. The 90s was all about being nasty and politically incorrect, and the rap scene reflected that. The rise of gangster rap had guys talking about how cool the thug life was, and there were all sorts of vulgar tunes being cranked out (“Pregnant Pussy” is from the 90s, if that tells you anything). As a white boy in a cutthroat industry where black men are the kings being taken under the wing of the man who produced “Fuck tha Police,” Marshall Mathers really wasn’t gonna do anything other than assimilate into the culture of the time to survive. And it worked; he’s pretty much the only white rapper besides maybe the Beastie Boys who has kept a long and generally well-liked career. He played by the rules, made sure to acknowledge his place, kept his ego in check outside his songs, collaborated with the right people, and boom! Rap has its token white boy.

But the edgy violent white boy schtick that made Slim Shady so funny and… “endearing” back in the day is not really something people like in 2024. Since the 90s, edgy white boys like the Slim character have shot up schools, sexually assaulted women and gotten away with it, openly supported fascism, and whined about queer people and black people being in Star Wars. No one fucking likes a Slim because they’ve been ruining our world for a while now, so this character who was once a beloved aspect of Em’s career just doesn’t sit right with the people of today. Add onto the fact that he’s a middle aged man, and he can’t just be doing the same crap all these years later without looking like the cringiest man alive, a rapping Elon Musk. With all that, and the fact his upcoming album is called The Death of Slim Shady, you’d think maybe he’d drop a single to showcase how he’s evolved over his career, how his sobriety and fatherhood have changed him, and how the Slim persona is well and truly in the past.

Instead he released “Houdini.”

For better or for worse, this is a return to that classic late 90s/early 2000s Slim style, with everything that implies. Get ready for lots of references, offensive jokes, and more, cuz I’m going line by line to talk about the content of Slim Shady’s final comeback. And while I am going to analyze some of the lamer and more questionable jokes, I want to make it clear that I understand the Slim character is satirical and whatever. I'm not fucking dumb, and I've been listening to Eminem for 24 years now. Being satire is not an excuse to be unfunny.

After an ominous skit where Em’s manager Paul Rosenberg tells him he’s own his own for this album, we have an intro to kick the song off:

Guess who’s back, back again? Shady’s back, tell a friend Guess who’s back? Guess who’s back? Guess who’s back? Guess who’s back? Guess who’s back? Guess who’s back? Guess who’s back? (Da-da-da, da, da, da, da, da, da) (Da-da-da, da, da, da, da)

As should be obvious to anyone with a passing knowledge of Eminem, this is a reuse of the intro of his classic “Without Me.” This is a double-edged sword; on the one hand, it is a fun little callback to his earlier career and helps once more establish that he’s bringing it like he did back then. But on the other hand, you’re reminding the audience of one of your best songs right off off the bat, so if this one doesn’t live up to that, you’re in for a world of hurt.

Now’s also a good time to mention that the song heavily samples “Abracadabra” by the Steve Miller Band. From what I’ve gathered, a lot of people find that song unbelievably corny… but that’s why I love it. And I mean, the song’s called “Houdini,” so why not sample the massive smash hit song that’s named after the famous magic words? Again, for me at least, sampling a song I already love means you’re gonna have to really kick it into high gear to make me want to listen to yours over what you’re sampling. There’s about a million songs that sample “When the Levee Breaks,” but how many of those do you think I’m putting on over Led Zeppelin, y’know?

Well, look what the stork brung (What?) Little baby devil with the forked tongue And it's stickin' out, yeah, like a sore thumb (Bleh) With a forehead that it grew horns from (Look) Still a white jerk (It's him), pullin' up in a Chrysler to the cypher With the Vics, Percs and a Bud Light shirt Lyrical technician (Yeah), an electrician (Yeah) Y'all light work (Haha) And I don't gotta play pretend, it's you I make believe (What?) And you know I'm here to stay 'cause me (Why?) If I was to ever take a leave (What?) It would be aspirin' to break a feve' (Yeah)

So far it’s been pretty solid. It’s pretty clear Em’s still got it, great flow, delivery, subtle nods to his past work, boasts about his skills, talking about how he started from the bottom… It’s nothing really groundbreaking, but it’s at least continuing the idea that Slim is back, baby! I sure hope he doesn’t derail his momentum in the next couple of lines with a stupid, cringeworthy jab at a woman who literally never did anything to him!

If I was to ask for Megan Thee (What?) Stallion if she would collab with me Would I really have a shot at a feat? (Haha) I don't know, but I'm glad to be back like

So a little context here, for those not in the know: In 2022, rapper Megan Thee Stallion accused fellow rapper Tory Lanez of shooting at her feet and saying, “Dance, bitch, dance” like he’s a comic book mobster. The case was taken to court, where Lanez was found guilty and then sentenced to up to 22 years in jail. Now, the two have shouted out each other before—Em interpolataed the hook of Megan’s song “Body” in 2021’s “Killer (Remix),” while Megan referenced “The Real Slim Shady” on her feature on Lil Nas X’s “DOLLA SIN SLIME”--but I’m not really sure the two are close to the point where it’s cool for Em to jokingly reference the time some psychopath acted like a Batman villain to her. The fact Megan’s 2024 diss track “Hiss” referenced Mariah Carey’s “Obsessed,” which was about Eminem, does make me side-eye this bar.

But hey, one corny, cringey joke is whatever. Let’s see how the rest of the song goes:

Abra-abracadabra (And for my last trick) I'm 'bout to reach in my bag, bruh (Like) Abra-abracadabra (And for my last trick, poof) Just like that and I'm back, bro

So this is the chorus, and I have to say it’s incredibly lazy and boring. It’s just an Eminem-themed parody of the original chorus, and it’s not especially interesting. That being said, by token of being a chorus of a song I already like just with lyrical alterations, I don’t think it’s bad either. I just expect a little more cleverness from Eminem.

Now, back in the days of old me (When?) Right around the time I became a dope fiend (Oh) Ate some codeine as a way of coping (Mm) Taste of opiates, case of O.E. Turned me into smiley face emoji (Woo)

Here, now we’re back on track! Em is reflecting on his old self and talking about his drug-addled early career! Surely he’ll stay the course here and dig deep into his manic persona that was partly created by his addictions, and not veer off into alt-right talking points and child abuse jokes!

My shit may not be age-appropriate But I will hit an eight-year-old in the face with a participation trophy 'Cause I have zero doubts That this whole world's 'bout To turn into some girl scouts That censorship bureau's out to (Shut me down) So when I started this verse It did start off lighthearted at first (Hmm) But it feels like I'm targeted

Hoo boy, we’re whining about how “sensitive” the world is becoming and how censorship is coming to get you! Eminem is going full boomer now. But hey, maybe he has a point! You can’t sing songs where you violently murder the mother of your child and then abduct said child anymore, because of woke. You can’t rap about mass shootings right after they happen either, also because of woke. Whatever, grandpa. Let’s see if you have anything of actual substance.

Mind-bogglin' how my profit has skyrocketed Look what I pocketed Yeah, the shit is just like y'all had been light joggin', and I've been runnin' at full speed And that's why I'm ahead like my noggin', and I'm the fight y'all get in When you debate who the best, but opps, I'm white chalkin' when I step up to that mic, cock it then "Oh my God, it's him! Not again!"

Just some pre-chorus boasting topped off with a throwback to his song “As the World Turns.” It doesn’t completely erase the bad taste of his whiny boomerisms out of your mouth, but it’s at least something.

Sometimes, I wonder what the old me'd say (If what?) If he could see the way shit is today (Look at this shit, man) He'd probably say that everything is gay (Like happy) What's my name? What's my name? (Slim Shady)

Em’s had a long, troubled reputation with queerness. He came under a lot of fire for homophobia back in the day, but then his friendship with Elton John happened. There’s also his brief appearance in the Seth Rogen movie The Interview, where he plays himself as a closeted gay man. Even still, he’s often used queerness as jokes in his songs, mainly as an attempt to emasculate his opponents (something he even did to an actual queer rapper, Tyler the Creator). As a bisexual man myself, I do find it tasteless in general, but in the context of this song I thing it’s ok. Like yeah, the homophobic crackhead Slim Shady persona would call the world we live in gay. The line still feels a little weird, though; is the Slim persona actually singing this song, or is this Em reflecting on the Slim persona? It kind of muddies the water, and makes it hard to figure just how seriously we’re supposed to be taking everything here.

So how many little kids still wanna act like me? (Haha) I'm a bigger prick than cacti be (Yeah) And that's why these (What?) Words sting just like you were being attacked by bees (Bzz) In the coupe, leaning back my seat (What?) Bumpin' R. Kelly's favorite group (Uh), the black guy (Guy) pees (Pees, haha) In my Air Max 90s White Ts, walkin' parental advisory

Verse three starts off pretty good! The R. Kelly joke is extremely juvenile and crass, but that’s the sort of thing I enjoy from Slim. It may be low-hanging fruit, but that’s the fruit you wanna grab the most. Now what wacky sort of humor is Slim going to bring to this verse next? Surely he won’t make some incredibly stupid and corny joke that isn’t funny in the slightest and derails the whole song!

My transgender cat's Siamese (Why?) Identifies as black, but acts Chinese (Haha)

According to Genius, this line might actually be a reference to a Dave Chapelle bit from 2019’s Sticks & Stones. If that’s the case, I really don’t need to say much more. There’s no way to read this line in anything other than the worst possible light.

Like a motherfuckin' Hacky Sack, I treat (What?) The whole world 'cause I got it at my feet (Yeah) How can I explain to you (What?) That even myself I'm a danger to? (Yeah) I hop on tracks like a kangaroo And say a few things or two to anger you

So he does openly admit he says fucked up stuff to get a rise out of people. Going in to the song, I knew this. The guy’s a provocateur, it’s what he does, and the Slim persona has always been about being as flagrantly offensive as possible. But the thing is, even the stuff here I’m taking issue with doesn’t make me mad; I’m more disappointed than anything, really. Like he has to know that times have changed and people really aren’t all in on this sort of humor anymore, right? What is the point of bringing Slim back to a world that has evolved beyond him, even if to finally kill him off? If that’s what he wanted to do he could do it without trying to showcase the dated humor. This is the musical equivalent of watching an 80s sex comedy like Porky’s or Revenge of the Nerds. Like maybe it was funny way back when, but looking back at it through a modern lens it’s just really gross and unpleasant and full of terrible messages.

But fuck that, if I think that shit, I'ma say that shit Cancel me, what? Okay, that's it Go ahead, Paul, quit, snake-ass prick You male cross dresser (Haha), fake-ass bitch And I'll probably get shit for that (Watch) But you can all suck my dick, in fact Fuck them, fuck Dre, fuck Jimmy, fuck me, fuck you Fuck my own kids, they're brats (Fuck 'em) They can screw off (Yeah), them and you all (Uh) You too, Paul (Punk), got two balls Big as RuPaul's (Woah) What you thought you saw ain't what you saw (Nah) 'Cause you're never gon' see me Caught sleepin' and see the kidnappin' never did happen Like Sherri Papini, Harry Houdini I vanish into the thin air as I'm leavin' like

The rest of the final verse, save for another tired shot at cancel culture, is fine. I might even say it’s a bit funny; I like him taking at shot at Dre, himself, everyone he’s worked with, his own kids… That part is where it is really obvious the whole thing is tongue-in-cheek, because he is by all accounts a good and loving dad. Making fun of RuPaul and Papini are fine in my book too.

So I’ve been pretty critical of this song and rather unamused by a lot of its jokes. This must mean I hate it, right? Well… no. I can’t say I love it, but I really don’t think this is awful. Trust me, I’ve heard awful Eminem and this isn’t it. “Just Lose It” and “We Made You” are light years ahead of this song in terms of awfulness. On top of that, this is also the first single off of an album that’s all about killing Slim—I don’t really have the full context. For all I know, this could be part of an overarching concept of the album, Slim’s last ride before his inevitable death, and in that regard this is definitely a perfect modern take on the classic Slim Shady song, warts and all. We just live in a world where his kind of humor doesn’t age badly, it just ends up dead on arrival more often than not.

If nothing else, it still showcases Eminem has great flow, great wit, clever writing… and that’s what he should stick to instead of making tired, unfunny boomer jokes about cancel culture and queer people just to rile people up. Hopefully that’s what the rest of the album will be like when it drops. I doubt I’m going to review every single song on it since I’m no Todd in the Shadows and my musical knowledge is very casual, but maybe I’ll give my opinions. Until that time, though, I think I’ll just listen to “Venom” again.

[neptunedivine]

my 2023 solar return observations

(tw: possible eating disorder mentions)

I was looking over my solar return chart yesterday and it made me very nervous. When I get nervous I feel better writing everything out. So that’s what I’m going to do :)

✨natal north node year✨ ✧ I turn my north node degree this year! My NN is Gemini 11H at 21° and in combination with everything else going on in my solar return, it does amp up the anxiety for me. I feel like I’m gonna be shoved into my destiny because I’ve been stalling for so long (well not stalling as avoiding, but not taking the leap(s) I need to out of fear).

8H stellium ✧ tbh I just wanted to address the obvious in all its glory before I tried to dissect it any further. Transformations feel like they’ll be a focal point this year, like heavily. But then again looking at the planets that make up this stellium (aside from Chiron), it doesn’t seem too bad? We’ll see.

Virgo rising at 3° + mercury as the chart ruler in Pisces 8H @ 29° ✧ I taste a lot of criticism in the air (mainly from myself but we’ll see). Some of this energy looks familiar because natally I have my mercury in Pisces in the 8H but @ 10°. Virgo is on my 3H cusp natally as well. Naturally knowing myself I feel like writing is going to be the focus for the year. Since my natal NN is also ruled by my chart ruler this year, I think I’m going to be pushed to really start making music this year. Especially since mercury is conjunct with my sun too. I think putting more time and dedication into it will change my life? (I’ve been viewing a lot of readings lately telling me that my passions and creativity will grant me great abundance so this could be in association) There could be an emphasis on me speaking my truth as well. Possible recognition as well with it being at 29°? It feels intense not only because it’s a fame degree but it’s the fate degree and conjunct with the Aries point.

Pisces sun 8H @ 28° ✧ I’m used to the placement but not in the 8H. With it being conjunct with my mercury I feel like this could be related to me shedding a bad mindset or patterns in my habits this year? (I feel like this pairs well with my Saturn placement which I’ll talk about later). As well as finding a trusted source to have deep conversations with (possibly a therapist) seems very likely for this year.

Aquarius Moon 6H @ 19° ✧ I think I will be very analytical and regulatory with my emotions and my feelings this year. Instead of feeling everything and questioning everything and feeling lost, especially with the possibility of a therapist, being able to dissect the reason for why I feel certain ways may happen. I also spiraled a lot in the past year so there could be a sense of grounding brought into the year.

Taurus Venus 9H @ 2° + + NN @ 4°+ Uranus @ 16° ✧ I don’t see myself traveling really? I could travel to somewhere beautiful, but since my natal venus is in 9H too this would be a continuation of my love for other cultures. A possible love interest from a different country or uni could be possible, but my guides know for sure that I’m not looking for that right now…right? Idk I’ve been very career driven for a few years now and I don’t see that changing. But who knows since my SR Uranus and NN are in the same house lol. Speaking of Uranus here, please for the love of God let this not play with my degree. I'm supposed to graduate next spring.

✧ I’m just now noticing how many feminine degrees there are that inspire creativity (Taurus (2°,14°,26°), Libra (7°,19°), and Cancer (4°, 16°,28°). Pretty cool. ✧

Gemini Mars 10H @ 26° ✧ Pairing drive (Mars) with curiosity (Gemini), this could relate to my passion and writing outside of the box of what is expected from me, or who I'd expect. (I have a list of talent that I really want to write for and I think about them when I write songs sometimes so that could be relevant). Or I could be just collaborating more? I’m not sure with the 8H stellium though. Oh! A drive to learn new things maybe? I’ve always wanted to get into production but with it being so white cis-male dominant it felt gatekeepy. But miraculously I have I think enough tools to figure out a good part of it independently.

Aries Jupiter 8H @ 16° ✧ I keep reading good things about this placement and I’m very excited about it. I could be receiving a large sum(s) of money this year (scholarships?). Also, this placement is not only conjunct with my natal venus but MC as well, so this energy could be amplified since having Venus/Jupiter in the 8H are very strong wealth indicators, but I could be gaining monetary abundance or just abundance in general towards my career somehow.

Pisces Saturn 6H @ 1° (tw: possible eating disorder mentions) ✧ I was watching a tiktok a few weeks ago about Saturn going into Pisces and what that could mean. They mentioned an end to things that relate to escapism, which makes sense since in modern astrology Pisces is ruled by Neptune, like overeating and procrastination. I feel like both of those topics would be covered in my life this year since the 6H rules over the physical body and health, but also the daily and routines. There could be a theme of cutting the bs and getting in control of my life in these areas. My Chiron natally is in the 6H so this has been a struggle I’ve been dealing with for a while. I don’t know if the "problem of Chiron” will be resolved but I think significant improvements could be made.

Pisces Neptune 7H @ 25° ✧ I don’t have the energy to be delusional in love this year please abeg. I have Neptune in the 7H but in Aquarius, so there’s an element of this that I’m used to. I could be continuing to manifest my dream partner? Because I do that every day when I listen to love songs and I really enjoy it. But a real person? In the flesh? Right now? Absolutely not, pass.

Capricorn Pluto 5H @ 29° ✧ I have my natal pluto in sag at 17° so I’m used to some of the energy but I think with it being Capricorn which rules over hard work and discipline rather than the freedom sag grants, I will take my passions seriously enough to make moves. Personally, I stress so much about making music and my skills and being really talented and getting everything right but I don’t do anything. I just sit in my charged obsessive energy. But hopefully, I’ll make the right moves this year. Recognition worthy? Possibly with how much 29° is popping up in my chart.

Taurus MC @ 29° ✧ The idea of getting recognition for my passion and my work feels very daunting for me because I don’t feel ready at all. I'm very perfectionistic with my passion. I'm so adamant about making it my career and being very well-known for it. I get very nervous about f*cking up. Regardless I don't think this year cares I might be shoved into the position to be seen, maybe not at its height because I glanced at my SR for the next two years and they feel like extensions of this year, like in acts.

that's all for now. see you later! :)

[starqueensthings]

Summary: a small ficlet that follows Hunter through a really rough night. Inspired by the below lyrics of a great song (which I encourage you to listen to at least once!). Please ensure you read the warnings before continuing into the fic.

POV: 3rd, 3591 words.

Warnings: TW: alcohol abuse, TW: self-medicating with substances, TW: self-hatred, TW: grieving the death of a loved one, TW: brief mentions of smoking. This is an angsty one folks! Give yourself a big hug after.

“The night I hit rock bottom, I was sitting on an old barstool. He paid my tab and put me in a cab… but he didn’t have to. He could see I was hurting, oh I wish I got his name. I didn’t feel worth saving, but he saved me just the same.”

He pushed the empty vessel across the counter and away from him; a subtle handprint embedded into the condensation on the glass by the clammy palm that held it just long enough to bring it to his lips. He’d drained many a frosted cup that night, each contributing a little more to the swim in his vision and the sway of his shoulders. The bartender, an abrasive Besalik male with a dirty rag draped over his shoulder, had long since stopped trying to make conversation with the sullen soldier, instead leaving him to self-medicate in peace while the sum of his tab grew larger and larger.

Another knock from the man’s knuckles had a full Corellian ale placed in front of him, precisely where the empty glass had rested seconds before. The pathetically thin crown of foam hugging the rim of the glass was an obvious indicator that the keg needed changing, though his presently anguished mental state had robbed him of the desire to care. It didn’t matter what it tasted like; he wasn’t here to be a beer connoisseur. Hell, he’d drink engine fuel right now if it promised even a brief moment of respite from the gnawing chest pain that had rendered him paralyzed for weeks.

He brought the cool glass to his lips again, his long hair falling off his shoulders as he tipped his head back and gulped until the contents were emptied. The heavy thud of its return to the counter echoed loudly in the room, or perhaps only loudly in his mind. He wiped his mouth with the back of a shaking hand, indifferent to the disgusted look the neighbouring patrons sent his way as he failed to stifle another burp.

The bartender’s gruff but well-intended warning of “you should maybe think about slowing it down a bit”, must have appeared to fall on deaf ears, as the man to which he was addressing made no motion that he’d heard, instead impatiently tapping on the counter again.

But Hunter’s ears were not deaf. They never had been, and never would be. He heard everything; every sob that left the mouth of the Twi'lek woman in the dimly lit corner booth as she cried to her sister about some betrayal of love; every jeering scoff from the man sitting four stools down as he boasted loudly about robbing an imperial officer several days previously; every clink of glass, and hiss of pressure as the bartender opened bottle after bottle of beer. But despite the raucous din reverberating from all angles, it could never be loud enough. There wasn’t a patron in this room whose boasts and complaints were boisterous enough to drown out the commentary in his mind, for it was the loudest and heaviest voice of all, and one that refused to be silenced by the nearly two dozen beers that he swallowed as a silent plea for relief.

He pulled the fresh pint towards him and brought it to his mouth, closing his eyes and willing the next few heavy gulps of stale ale to force down the painful lump that had taken permanent residence in his throat.

The soggy paper coaster adhered to the bottom of the glass by condensation, went unnoticed until it fell into his lap, startling him enough to send a sloop of liquid down his unshaved chin. His bleary eyes searched only briefly for a neglected napkin nearby before deciding the scarf around his neck would do the trick, and quickly reached for the red fabric to dry his face.

The mushy excuse for a cardboard coaster was now nothing but an afterthought, as his unfocussed eyes fell onto the mismatched thigh plates that adorned his legs. He clamped his eyes shut and swallowed against the sudden onslaught of sadness that threatened to overtake him, dozens of memories launching into a kaleidoscopic dance across his mind.

Hunter had never been a sentimental man, and when the time came to trade his Kaminoan-issued commando armour for a juxtaposed mixture of other, more discrete pieces, it had felt nothing but transactional at the time. It was a necessary change to maximize the concealment and safety of his family, so there was nothing else to it. Now, staring at the foreign straps that crossed his legs and roped around his waist, the desire for his old red and black armour overwhelmed him. In this lonely moment, alone in an obscure pub on an unknown planet, there was nothing he wouldn’t trade to go back to that time… that life.

Existence had been so simple then. So linear. So unproblematic. Back when he knew, without a fraction of a doubt, what his purpose was. A soldier, created to protect… to eliminate threat… to win. Straightforward. Uncomplicated. An existence that required his only responsibility was to maintain the continued safety of his squad, and to keep his boots from blistering his heels. There was no need to stay ‘off the radar’ then, because there was no radar to be on; with the exception of a few easily out-gunned tin heads, no one was after them. There was no need to stay hidden… there was no one black mailing him… no one manipulating the secrecy of his position to their advantage. He longed deeply for the carefree mind that he wasn’t aware he’d had then; a life free from guilt, remorse, resentment, pain. He longed for the past… a time where the only imminent concern was what the long necks would say when he landed back on the planet with half his face tattooed, and even concerns like that were trivial… almost comical.

He tried again to force the lump down his throat with whatever dregs remained in the glass clutched in his hand before discarding it. The image of his silver haired brother appeared in his mind before he could stop it; a vivid memory of a better time.

The Sniper pole on his pauldron claimed an unnecessary amount of space in his immediate vicinity, as it always did when Crosshair folded his long arms across his chest. As he leaned back against the counter, and watched the tattooist put the final touches on Hunter’s skull tattoo, the toothpick in his mouth danced playfully across his ever-smirking lips. The sound of the wood flicking against his molars was more than a little irksome to Hunter’s overstimulated ears, but he refused to comment or complain, knowing the annoying new compulsion was replacing the much unhealthier habit of smoking deathsticks.

“So much for subtle,” Crosshair had snarked through a heavy sneer, gesturing to the fresh black ink embedded in Hunter’s skin. “Might as well have done your entire body. Nala Se is going to shit a brick when she sees you.”

“Perfect. A nice healthy dump might do her some good,” Hunter answered back through a chortle. “And I don’t know about you, but I have no desire to go back to Kamino any time soon.”

“Of course you don’t,” Crosshair had answered with one of his infamous eye rolls. “There’s no dirt for you to sniff. If it was up to you, we’d park our life in the forest and you’d spend the rest of your life climbing trees and hunting animals.”

“Better than spending hours on-end laying in the grass with a soggy twig between my teeth.”

“I’ll happily resume smoking if you’d like. I only stopped because the smell bothered your princess nose.”

Pain gnawed at Hunter’s chest as he wrapped his knuckles on the counter again, biting down on the interior of his cheeks in an effort to control the emotion welling inside of him. He hadn’t been able to banter with anyone like that in a long, long time. Crosshair had always been a bottomless pit of sarcasm, an endless loop of snarky quips that he could deliver with such tactful ease, the target rarely comprehended that he was insulting them. Hunter had yet to meet anyone else like the Sniper, and with each day that passed, it seemed less likely that he ever would again.

He had initially coped with the fracture of his squad with an unbecoming ignorance, refusing to entertain the nagging sadness that swelled inside him every time his eyes fell on Crosshair’s empty bunk, or when he found himself wishing the flick of a toothpick would break the deafening silence of his absence.

Wrecker had taken Crosshair’s departure the hardest, frequently turning to Hunter for an explanation as to why things had played out the way they did. Again, Hunter pled blissfully ignorant, choosing to blame the decision on the idiopathic activation of the inhibitor chip, because it was an easier pill to swallow than the thought of his brother leaving willingly, and abandoning their symbiotic relationship for the cold hands of the Empire. That was until their last meeting, when the hope of a peaceful reunion was scorched by an inferno of truth; Crosshair’s chip was out, and he’d continued to hunt them long after its removal.

Despite the admission, on Nala Se’s hidden landing platform, they offered Crosshair an opportunity; the chance to fortify what was left of the shambled bridge that connected him to his former squad, the chance to forgive and forget, to rejoin them… but he’d chosen not to. Whether it be pure asinine obstinance, or his innate inability to see perspectives other than his own, he’d turned his back on them again.

Hunter cleared his throat and drained another glass, returning his gaze upwards to the holoscreen perched behind the bar that was showing last nights podracing highlights on loop. The room swayed around him as his eyes sluggishly tried to follow the speeders zooming across the screen, churning his stomach enough to force his eyes away again almost immediately.

The sudden illumination of blue light from the comlink on his wrist went ignored; an unnecessary reminder that Hunter was not where he should be. He told Echo hours ago that he was going for a walk back to the nearby town to poke around again, but an unexplainable amount of time had passed since then, and the countless ales he’d swallowed since, had yet to placate the lingering pain in his chest. Guilt forced his gaze to his fiddling fingers, drumming distractedly on the counter in front of him. Echo deserved better than to be blatantly ignored like this.

The fire of resolve and determination that burned brightly inside Hunter’s chest in the immediate wake of Omega’s capture, had been doused repeatedly by the lack of usable information they’d been able to scrounge up. Echo had reached out to every contact he knew, every unground clone he’d connected with after joining Rex’s efforts. They’d flown to every planet that promised even a whisper of a chance of finding her, but the continued let-downs had collapsed Hunter’s confidence entirely.

Tonight was the closest he’d ever felt to throwing in the towel. They’d raced sixteen parsecs across the galaxy, burning through more fuel than was smart at the promise of finding an Imperial Science Lab on the sand planet of Jakku, only to arrive and find out it was nothing but a group of Mechanical Mod Doctors, paid to replace miscellaneous body parts with cybernetics, all-the-while wearing imperial uniforms they’d undoubtedly stolen at some point.

Unfortunately, they realized the nature of the establishment a little too late, and Echo had launched into an unbridled fit of blind rage at the sight of their work, forcing the three of them to retreat back to the ship before they drew any more attention.

Knock knock. Another glass pressed to his chapped lips.

Echo had been living life on a short fuse since Tech’s fall. Where Wrecker was devastated, Echo was angry. As an ARC, it was his job to be aware of all the possible outcomes of a mission, but they’d waited a long time for a sign that Crosshair was still himself, and when his warning came through an old com channel, there was barely a breath of hesitation. They premeditated as much of their moves as they could have based on the extremely limited intel they had… but no one had prepared for Plan-99. Nothing could have. Nothing would have.

The sound of his own panicked voice rang across Hunter’s mind: “Wrecker, get him on board!” Such a simple command. As if Wrecker hadn’t already been doing his best. As if Tech hadn’t been dangling in the middle of the sky, calculating the probabilities of every possible outcome of that situation. As if Omega wasn’t already terrified and traumatized enough by the extended firefight they’d found themselves in.

He slammed the glass down on the counter, and clamped his eyes closed on the tears that threatened to escape his eyes as the image of his goggled brother appeared in his mind. Tech. Trusty Tech… keeping everyone firmly grounded with logic. What would he say if he could see him right now? Tech never indulged in alcohol, finding the separation it induced between his mind and body to be too unnerving. Hunter could almost hear his info dump on “the enhancing effects that alcohol had on the neurotransmitter GABA that controlled a person’s sense of inhibition and self-control.” A small smile peeled across Hunter’s anguished face as he remembered Wrecker’s booming: “Buzzkill!” triggering one of Tech’s longest ever cold-shoulders.

“What a mess,” Hunter whispered thickly to himself, slowly shaking his head in defeat.

“You sure are.”

He turned his head to the left and frowned at the stranger lifting a leg and perching himself on the neighbouring stool. Through blurred eyes, Hunter noticed a thick mop of white hair, combed neatly to one side and seemingly held in place with a wax or cream of sorts. The man’s skin was a shade of gold that only years in the sun could achieve, and he had a collection of brown age spots scattered across the thin skin of his frail cheeks. Hunter turned away from the reminiscent looking smile on his wrinkled lips, feeling suddenly and unexplainably exposed, and vulnerable.

“You better get some food before you float away on all that beer in your belly,” the man continued, gesturing an arthritic finger to the empty glass clutched loosely in Hunter’s hand.

“Not hungry,” Hunter grumbled, abruptly rotating himself away from the man, but the alcohol coursing through his veins had rendered his movements sluggish and delayed, and he realized a fraction of a moment too late that he’d swayed a little too far off his seat. He quickly flung his hands out, his sandy fingers grappling against the rim of the counter as the rickety wood stool holding his weight teetered on its two back legs. His heart lurched into action, beating heavily and loudly in his ears as he hurried to stabilize himself.

“It’s okay. You’re alright,” the old man cooed from beside him, extending a hand outwards and applying a surprisingly firm, steadying grip on Hunter’s arm. “Slow and steady does the job.”

Hunter jerked his arm from the man’s grip, readjusting himself on the seat of the stool as embarrassed breaths left his nose in sharp huffs. With knitted brows and a scowl that would have made Crosshair proud, he wrapped on the counter again, deliberately ignoring the kind albeit searching looks from the senior beside him.

“You a soldier, son?” the man probed warmly, pivoting on his seat to face Hunter, and leaning one arm against the bar.

“I was,” Hunter grunted back, again deliberately turning his face away from the man, eager to hide the emotion he knew was still present on his flushed face. The man hummed through a small smile and a gentle nod of his head.

“And who are you now?” he asked with a tone of warm intensity.

Hunter snorted and shook his head, blinking slowly and keeping his eyes averted. The sudden increase in his heart rate from what his body deemed to be a near death fall off the stool had sent his head spinning uncomfortably again.

“I dunno…” he slurred. “A failure.”

“Nice to meet you, Failure. I’m Old Geezer.” The man extended a wrinkled and slightly trembling hand into the space between them, the same reminiscent smile still tugging at his lips. Hunter merely glanced down at the offering of peace, but could not muster the resolve to return it, instead directing his hand to collect the refilled glass from the counter in front of him. “Just a little old man humour,” the stranger continued in a mumble, retracting his offer and interlacing his fingers with his other hand. “Let me tell you something, son. I’ve lived ‘round these parts for close to eight decades, and I don’t know if I’ve ever seen someone throw beers back like you.”

“Well, ‘ur we— hic… welcome for… hic… the show…” Hunter stammered through a sudden bout of hiccups. “Con— hic… consider ‘urself luc— lucky.” To his surprise, the man tossed his head back and chuckled a wheezy laugh, his weathered cheeks narrowing his already unapologetically crinkled eyes.

“I already do, son,” he answered genuinely. “Now, let’s get you out of here before you’re evicted for drinking the whole town dry.”

Hunter glared against his implications, though could not stall the balloon of shame from expanding in his gut. He hung his head to his chest, the scowl on his face softening to an anguished frown as his fingers slackened their hold on the half-empty glass in his hand. He heaved a weighty sigh and closed his eyes, nudging the cup until it was beyond his reach.

“Good man,” the senior praised, standing up from his stool and pulling Hunter’s slack arm around his shoulders.

The sergeant was grateful for the added stability of his new companion as he got to his own feet and immediately felt his knees begin to buckle below him. He reached for the counter again, gripping it with an iron fist as his lethargic brain hurried to keep up with his heavy body’s movements. As they pivoted on the spot and headed towards the door, the faces of the other patrons turned to ogle at the odd pair; a frail old man that they knew well and had likely seen hundreds of times, acting as a living crutch for the inebriated, unknown soldier that had spent hours warming a stool at the bar. Their lips flattened in a mixture of disgust and contempt at the sight of his heavily lidded eyes and uncoordinated, staggering steps.

“Hold up! That man has a hefty tab he needs to pay down!” the bartender shouted as the wizened old man pulled the door open into the night air.

“Not to worry, Philo. Just go ahead and add it to mine,” the senior answered nonchalantly, detaching his hand from Hunter’s to toss the bartender a brief dismissing wave.

The sergeant was shocked to see that the scorching sun that had burnt the backs of their necks earlier that day, had disappeared completely, leaving the sky to be illuminated only by the waning light of a distant crescent moon. As they took a hobbled step outside onto the stone walkway, a cool and refreshing zephyr lifted the hair off the back of his sweaty neck, forcing his eyes open. After standing unsteadily on his feet, waiting for the old man to hail the nearby taxi, he let his bulky armoured frame be guided carefully on to the bench seat in the back of the car. The cabin of the vehicle smelled sickly sweet, something along the lines of the Mantell mix that Omega always insisted they snack on post successful mission, and it brought a new wave of sadness to his chest.

“Let me tell you something before you go, son, and I want you to remember it.” The old man spoke quietly and deliberately, leaning onto his forearms to speak into the backseat through the lowered window. “People only hurt this hard, because they’ve loved equally as hard, and that will never make you a failure. Do you understand?” Hunter swallowed against the poignancy of his words, dropping his gaze to his knees as his dark eyes threatened to fill with tears.

“Look at me, son.” It was not a command but a request, voiced without even a hint of dominance or demand. Hunter swallowed again and turned to look at him. “Whatever it was that you’ve done, or lost, to make you feel like a failure,” the man continued, his blue eyes twinkling with a sentience that future Hunter would never be able to adequately describe. “It can be repaired, as long as you keep your hopes high, and your chin higher. Remember that and you’ll be just fine.”

He backed away from the door and gave the hood of the taxi a sharp pat with his palm before stepping up onto the curb, and shoving his hands into his tunic pockets. Hunter, still trying to force his painfully languid brain into processing the kind advice, hurried to sit upright, suddenly eager and desperate to offer some sort of rushed thanks to the selfless stranger, but the taxi pulled away before his exhausted body would obey his commands. He had no choice but to lean forward in his seat and watch the wizened old man’s figure shrink away into the darkness behind him.

[softness-and-shattering]

About the Mean Girls musical movie

I know Ive had conversations before about the cultural context stuff, that it seems like the message was not as effective as the first movie when the stuff its talking about, how girls are wrong whatever they do and everything is up for criticism and filming, and you have to pretend to be sweet and kind fairy princesses instead of being allowed to be human. And Id have to go back and find those posts to see what I do and dont agree with now. Because I just saw the movie. And honestly, I liked it. A lot of the visuals were really fun and interesting, which I think is impressive in a movie that mostly takes place inside of a high school. Regina more than once looks like she's in a music video, and that works because shes so hyped, its like she lives in a reality where not only do people break into song, but she's always in a music video. She really sells the character, self-assured and in charge and perfectly manipulative, and even when she's being vulnerable you're like, but is this another deception? She's more villainous in this version, and by the end maybe more human as well. (also the costuming is phenomenal, that Halloween angel dress?? The entire Halloween Someone Get Hurts sequence might be my favourite. )

Also Renee Rapp, who plays Regina, is just incredibly hot. She also played Regina on Broadway so it makes sense she has the character down. Thats not film critique thats my personal admiration. Its almost a little silly with the "oh no Regina is gaining weight she cant fit her clothes" because she looks amazing. [Edit: She's also obviously - I was gonna say she seems older than the other "teens" but actually she's 24, so Im having a moment of feeling old. And she's actually the same age as Auli'i Cravalho who is a lot younger in my mind because holy shit Moana came out EIGHT years ago?? Angourie Rice/Cady is 23, Jaquel Spivy/Damian is 26, Avantika/Karen is 19, thats more the age I thought they were but not the cast seems to be mostly 23-26. Its so weird when times moves the same for people while your image of them in your head stays the same. So Rapp isn't older she's just a bit bigger (neutral/positive). And she's been playing the role for a long time. And Im allowed to find her hot because she's a goddamn adult and so am I. This paragraph is not critique it is me blogging on my blog. Now Im annoyed at myself for Caveats of Fear but Im gonna stop dwelling on that now.]

On that note, though I originally liked the musical quite a lot, the significant fatphobia in it soured it for me. And Im happy to say in the musical movie, they changed or omitted those lines. I was waiting to cringe and they just sang something else. So that was great. I think the only fat character was Damian (why does that suddenly look like a vampire name?) - Jaquel Spivy - and he seemed comfy and cool, no self deprecating fat jokes or anything. Generally the lines/jokes that were uncomfortable or a bit bigoted have been changed. Though there isnt any disability rep, and theres a random character the burn book claims puts alcohol in her inhaler, like a 3 second joke.

And the big thing is that a lot of the meanness is shown in montages of vertical video and comments - no-brand tiktok obviously - and I think thats pretty realistic, and also in the original theme of not being mean to peoples faces but talking all kinds of shit behind their backs. And I think the montage format is effective in mimicking that endless scroll eyes glazing over stuck in the doom scroll/stuck in the spectacle. The music was good. I really liked how they overlaid the Spring Fling/thematic music with the math competition. If anything, Cady is not as good of a character, her Plastic switch is basically overnight, the scene with Aaron at the party is still kinda of awkward, she doesnt get as much room to breathe, while almost everyone else comes off really well. Heck even the candy cane/glen coco guy did well, I was actually suprised at how differently and yet excellently the actors acted their lines, compared both to the previous movie and the musical. Auli'i is fantastic, scary Janis is *scary*. And I simultaneously want to be her best friend. (It certainly helps that her art is augmented with embroidery and she's carrying embroidery hoops in multiple scenes. Fiber arts my loves.)

When I first saw a trailer my thoughts were "ugh we dont need another movie of this," but I think Ive changed my mind. Its similar enough and different enough that for me its a good adaptation. Also - I almost forgot to say - Janis gets a girlfriend for Spring Fling. Its not a plot point, we're just montaging getting ready and Janis goes to pick her up (in the lavender suit), and Damian is taking photos with two other sapphic couples. And he gets a crush/admirer who again, is just there to be there and doesnt interfere with the main story. I might change my mind again once its had time to settle in my thoughts, but initial impression is that its a fun movie I would watch again. Maybe we want the social commentary to be more incisive than it is, and in the end it is entertainment that needs to not be too boring to hold peoples shortening attention spans. (also neutral). Maybe thats wishing for it to be a movie that its not trying to be, and thats always a recipe for disappointment and also not great or fair analysis. What a fantastic line to end on*.

[petruchio]

but also. 2 weeks out, are you feeling any differently about ttpd??

honestly… not really! like as in i have not really changed my mind, i still think it’s a solid meh, there’s some absolute bangers on there (icdiwabh, guilty as sin?, but daddy i love him are all still stand out tracks to me.) and some genuinely heart wrenching ballads (loml, peter, and the black dog are my personal favs) but i still think overall it could’ve been GREAT with a bit more editing, a bit more polishing and more inspired production, and a bit less obsessive idiom usage/misguided attempts at incorporating academia (like… the metaphors she uses in the albatross are just kind of uninspired imo, like i love rime of the ancient mariner and the albatross as a metaphor is so rich and instead she just jammed a bunch of random “academic” references in there. i would’ve preferred if she’d stuck to coleridge bc it would’ve slapped, imagine if we’d had a legit good song a la hozier incorporating stuff like “water water everywhere” or references to cross bows or something. it could’ve been COOL) (similarly i actually really like down bad but the central metaphor feels so 80% done. like the spaceship metaphor in the verses is amazing — but what does that have to do with the gym or teenage petulance? it sounds like two songs jammed together — or a song that had a cool idea but they didn’t work on it enough to tie it all together (my same beef with orod’s vampire half baked metaphor. like if you’re doing a bit, DO IT! commit!! to the bit!!!!!)

so yeah to answer the question no not really. i still feel pretty much the same as i did before. it’s bloated and messy and unpolished and that’s not a good thing. i still like several tracks and believe me ive been BUMPING the ones i do, but im not going to sit here and act like it’s her best work (or even close to it) and i just wish it had been more cohesive and edited. its fine. but it couldve been AWESOME.

[nightvyre]

Appreciation post for HoTD soundtrack

Sad my man Ramin Djawadi isn’t nominated for Emmy but i know that he will get that nom for later seasons (Gullet *ekhm* God’s Eye *ekhm*) ANYWAY still wanted to make a mini-essay to appreciate his works for HoTD S1, starting with the first piece we hear on the series : The Heirs of the Dragon.

THE HEIRS OF THE DRAGON

This is the first piece we hear on the series. This theme is definitely a nod to House Targaryen’s theme. It’s slower, but more powerful. More glory. You could feel the magnitude of House Targaryen’s power which, makes sense, because during this scene, Rhaenyra was explaining how House Targaryen stood at the height of its strength.

And then you could hear the GoT main title’s theme in 1:44, which i think is just an easter egg because the first episode has no opening title; this scene serves as one.

And then from 1:58, you could hear the beating drums, but it’s not like the usual beats that signal a triumph. No, these are chilling drumbeats that signify the decline of an empire. Because that is what HoTD is about: The Dance of the Dragons, a Targaryen civil war that resulted in the collapse of the Targaryen Dynasty.

The drums that we hear on The Heirs of the Dragon is also part of Aemond Targaryen’s theme. Which is actually a really cool detail because, in a way, it was Aemond who (accidentally) started the civil war. We hear this beating drums several time during Aemond’s scenes when:

he went to the Dragonpit to see dragons after being mocked for not having one

he claimed Vhagar (Aemond Rides Vhagar, 0:00 - 0:50)

he was ranting to Criston Cole how he should be king instead of Aegon

he chased Lucerys Velaryon and ultimately killed him (Bloodlines Will Burn, 1:17 - 1:28)

So yeah I think it’s a really nice touch because Ramin Djawadi succeeds in telling the premise of the series in 2,5 minutes, as well as setting the tone for the whole show: we’re dealing with something powerful, something huge, something that will alter history. A tragedy that could only be ended the way it started: with fire and blood.

THE GREEN DRESS

Alicent Hightower’s theme song, which captures her character perfectly. The beginning of it encapsulates Alicent’s sad, manipulated, and lonely childhood. Then it builds up towards 1:25 where the tone changes: Alicent realizes that she is Queen now, that she holds power, and that she is willing to do anything for the survival of her house and her children. Nevertheless, despite the change of tones, we could still hear the tragic melody, foreshadowing that Alicent, despite being queen now, will still have a tragic ending. That tragedy will follow her from childhood until her death.

I also love the chosen title for this piece. It refers to the famous green dress that Alicent wore during Rhaenyra Targaryen’s wedding. When she entered the room in the middle of King Viserys’ speech.

"The king will not be happy. Right in the middle of his speech." "The beacon, on the high tower, do you know what color it glows when Oldtown call its banners to war?" "Green."

With a single entrance, Alicent declared war against Rhaenyra. The color was so important that since then, everyone on the Queen’s side was later known as "the Greens". And thus, this soundtrack officially became the Greens’ theme.

Ramin recylced this theme for another piece of his work later on in the season : Interest of the Realm. The soundtrack of Aegon’s coronation. Unlike the original score, this is the epic version of The Green Dress. No tragic melody, just pure greatness that gives you goosebumps. Alicent’s theme comes at full power (2:10) when her son, Aegon, was walking down that aisle, waiting to be crowned King of the Seven Kingdoms.

BLOODLINES WILL BURN

The soundtrack during the first dragon fight in the show (not really a fight considering Vhagar is the largest dragon alive and Arrax is … well, not even 1/3 of her size). The showdown between Aemond Targaryen and Lucerys Velaryon, the event that started the Dance of the Dragons.

The first half of the soundtrack did a tremendous job in showing how terrifying Vhagar is, and how unhinged Aemond could be. That bit of Aemond’s theme in 1:18 with the repeated strings sound, as if echoing Aemond trying to search/hunt Luke in the middle of the storm. "You owe me a debt, boy!" And it keeps building up until 2:05, falsely luring the audience of Luke's safety, until Vhagar comes out of nowhere and ate Luke. The part from 2:06 - 2:30 felt like it came straight out of a horror movie, as Aemond realised the dire consequences of his actions.

And the second half ,,, now THAT is something that musicians have to take notes. The theme itself transitioned from horror-like music to Rhaenyra’s theme (The Power of Prophecy). Rhaenyra’s theme is hopeful, so we think we may have found relief when it starts playing, but then the theme became distorted and monstrous, because Rhaenyra just learnt that her son died. From 3:28 until 4:00, we could feel Rhaenyra’s devastation, grief, and anguish—all at once. And by 4:01 towards the end, Rhaenyra’s theme was fully corrosive. Rhaenyra wanted to solve the conflict with the Greens with peace. But then they took her son. There is no mercy or peace after this. Only war.

It’s literally a descent to madness. And Ramin Djawadi perfectly captured it.

i think it’s just beautiful that Ramin Djawadi really gives thoughts to all of the details and incorporates them to his works. HoTD sountracks are more than just background noises. Thanks to Ramin Djawadi and his talent, they also serve as a means of storytelling as well. It makes his works more memorable and have more depths.

[rdng1230]

More Ted Lasso Musings

Before I start let me say once again that this season has contained absolutely wonderful moments and is still a wonderful bit of light in a buuuuunch of darkness. Also spoiler warning.

Cool, so I've figured out what's bothering me this season and its that they're either showing us everything and telling us nothing, or showing us nothing (of actual character significance) and telling us everything. in the showing us everything and telling us nothing category we've got my love Keeley Jones. I feel like we've spent a massive amount of time at KJPR and I still feel like I'm scratching my head as to what they were trying to tell us. They've set Keeley up to be this incredibly competent and bright person, and when they give her her shot it all goes to shit. and I get it "you can't always get what you want" so says the song for this season's trailer, but I'm struggling to understand the thing that she got that she needed that she didn't already have. She had Rebeccas love and support, I mean she has Roy back but this does not seem like the show where the moral of a long story about her starting her own business is that she has her boyfriend back. I actually would love people's take on what you think we're supposed to get out of Keeley's storyline.

Onto the telling but not showing category we got my guy Nate the Great. He has been so totally short changed this season on his redemption arc. It is HARD to become a better person. It is HARD to admit you fucked up. It is HARD to turn against your own knee jerk insecurities and reactions. It is ESPECIALLY HARD to do that in an environment that is actively incentivizing you to act on those insecurities and reactions. So even though I absolutely believe Nate deserving and capable of these huge leaps forward in overcoming his own internal crap, I think we've completely sidelined that narrative of what's pushing him to actually take those huge leaps forward. At the end of season 2, it was clear Nate was really struggling, and I'm not gonna lie I hated the way he treated those around him, like Beard said it was "personal, and weird" but I also felt a huge amount of sympathy and compassion because no one gets that way without something horrible happening to them first. So when the last scene of season 2 happened and he was teased as this big time villain, I was sad, but not surprised. I expected him to get his redemption, but I also expected that to be a really difficult journey for him where he was likely going to get worse before he got better. So now we're in season 3 and he suddenly just makes all these huge leaps forward, they feel from out of nowhere, not because I don't feel like he's capable of it, but rather that should've been more difficult to do, and also it should've been a moment of great personal triumph for Nate! The way I think of it is imagine if Rebecca had just waltzed into teds office in season 1 and confessed about the sabotage with no context. Sure we would've believed her capable of it, sure we would've believed she deserved forgiveness, but we all would've been scratching our heads as to what made her have this reckoning within herself. they would've told us Rebecca changed instead of shown why and how she changed like what they're doing with Nate.

I actually think there's so many parallels between the relationship of Nate and Jade and the relationship of Roy and Jamie. Both Nate and Roy made stupidly bad and self destructive decisions around the end of last season. Both are in a low point in their emotional journeys, almost all of Nathan's emotional scenes have been with Jade while all of Roy's emotional scenes have been with Jamie. The thing is, that's not where their respective internal work really needs to get done? Nate already took the plunge and asked out Jade last season, and Roy already showed real vulnerability when he hugged Jamie after the thing with his dad (not that I think that means everything wrapped up with a shiny bow or anything, but just that each character has much bigger fish to fry in terms of character growth) I do think Nate and Jade have become really cute just as Roy and Jamie's scenes have felt ripped straight out of a fluffy fanfic. but do these scenes actually show us that Nate/Roy are getting better? We've already seen Nate being an absolute sweetheart with the women in his life who he loves, his mother, his niece (even if we didn't actually see her till this season it was clear that they had a very warm and positive relationship) and Keeley, so him being able to be vulnerable and open up with Jade is lovely, but not really that new of a territory. If we could just see Nate having a shift maybe with his coaching staff or the West Ham players, this would feel more meaningful because we saw him struggle way more with people he perceives as part of his own hierarchy structure. Its the same with Roy. We've seen Roy open up to Jamie in the past so their relationship, while fucking adorable, is not doing anything to address the real struggle inside Roy that he's ignoring. It would be way more meaningful to see Roy have moments where he chooses to have joy instead of running away. Instead we get scenes like where the sports pundit squad just says oh by the way Nate left West Ham, in the same way that Ms. Bowen says to Roy that he seems less stuck. Umm what? Since when? what happened? All tell and no show. Or showing only the least character growth relevant scenes and then just be like oh by the way they fixed it.

reblog and comment away because I'm interested in people's take on this.

[peachpopfizz]

yk the first couple of episode drops were a bit ehh to me but like.. these two just hit Right. maybe bc i knew what to expect pacing/story wise now? either way, they're def my faves so far, especially ep 5. that's my Favorite favorite :]

spoilers for both eps under the cut, mostly just me blabberin abt what i liked (warning: its alotta alastor)

for ep 5, at first i thought charlastors/radiobelles were winning (and while i don't ship it myself, i was happy for em) but then the realization of 'wait wait wait this isn't romo at all, alastors tryna be a FATHER FIGURE?!' hit instead and i went WILD bc thats 1000% my preferred dynamic for charlie and al. so uh.. yippee dadlastors, sorry charlastors..? gsjahafdaj

also the "Ha! Fuck you." im normal im normal im NORMAL im SOOOO FUCKIN NORMAL (IM CRAZY IM VRAZY I CRAZY IM CRASTY IM FUCKI)

mimzy!! (mimzie??) her intro was abrupt, but she seems like a doll, and her hug with al was real cute. tho i do think she needed that metaphorical kick in the ass abt al's thoughts when it comes to her leeching off his strength for protection. about that..

ALASTOR ACTUALLY CARES. HE CARES. (seemingly, at least). LIKE, HE ACTUALLY LEGITIMATELY, NON-FANONILY, GIVES A DAMN ABT THE HOTEL. HE WENT OUT OF THE WAY TO PROTECT THE PLACE AND TOLD MIMZY TO LEAVE IF SHE DIDN'T COME FOR REDEMPTION. MAYBE ITS IN HIS OWN WEIRD-GUARDED-PETTY WAY BUT FUCK FUCK HOOOLLLYY FUCK ALASTOR CARES

and one more thing b4 i move onto ep 6, i've already seen some ppl comparing what al did to husk in the hall to angel and val's dynamic, and while i do agree the two are both trapped in unsavory deals (loser, baby literally confirms this) i don't think al's ANYWHERE near as bad as val. was what he did fucked up? oh, yes, definitely. but it really?? shouldn't be surprising??? al's in hell ‘n has all this status for a reason, so i was really just waitin for a moment like that to happen. however, it didn't do any lasting damage. at least i really wouldn't say so. most it did was scare the shit out of husk for a minute, nowhere close to what val does to angel on the daily (see: episode 6). tho im willing to admit i might be lookin thru rose colored glasses bc i love al as a character. my opinion might change when/if the actual conditions of al and husks deal are revealed, but as of rn, i think al acted as he did there bc husk attacked a reeeally sensitive subject. he would've just been the petty bitch he always is if husk said like.. anythin else. oh and uhh yeah im abt 85% sure he and lilith have SOMETHING goin on. idk who the hell else would be powerful enough to have alastor on a leash

..oh yeah, lastly, lucifer was cool :] silly silly guy (with lotsa trauma) that hit me right in the daddy issues. funny tho, i rlly dont have much to say abt the guy despite the ep literally being focused on him. his song with charile was spectacular though, i need to listen to it on its own immediately

okokok, episode 6, finally, hopefully shorter than the mess of text above

first off. vaggie = fallen angel theorists, i would like to bow down and apologize for ever doubting you. i was one of the skeptics, i really was, but the show did it in a way that (albeit rushed, but what hasn't been so far?, thaaanks, 8-episode limit..) made it seem believable, with assdam calling her out for it..

but putting adam aside, uh, lute?? maam?? holy fuck, step on me??? please???? i mean uh. sick character design yk ahah ^^

whats her name.. emily? the younger seraphim girl, i liked her, she was a cutie. she really did just seem like heavens version of charlie. and the older seraphim woman i (expectedly) have mixed feelings abt. i feel like all would've be great it adam got outta her damn ear cause she might've actually be down to try the hotel with em gone.. angel was doing so well

speaking of angel, ANGEL!! oh lookit that character development, charlie's gonna be so fuckn proud!!! also, CHERRI!!!! saw someone else say cherris the devil on angels shoulder while husks the (heh) angel, and i have to say i agree. they both want the best for him, they just have different ways of goin about it.

unsurprisingly, fuck Valentino. although i did notice he was wearing a dress today, so. (through gritted teeth) slay.

thiiink that's all i gotta say for today?? besides the fact that next week is gonna be agonizing, ofc :] buckle up ppl we might get a genuine, emotional chaggie fight come next thursday

..oh yeah!! molly!!! we briefly saw molly!!!! i hope youre absolutely thriving girl, you deserve no less <3