notes on mlc
some personal thoughts about buddhism and mlc :D in some ways, its a further elaboration of the ideas mentioned in this post. @ananeiah @seventh-fantasy
1.
amongst the 3 main chinese philosophies, buddhism is the closest to my heart and personal life. confucianism comes second as i was exposed to it only in accompaniment to buddhism (studied 弟子规 standards for being a good student and child pretty intensely and its had a lot of presence throughout my life + a more modest focus on 三字经 three character classic). and lastly, i'm the furthest away from daoism. i know little about its texts and theories though most of my relatives are daoist; buddhism is on the scanter side in my family. there's a lot more to chinese philosophy than just these 3 schools, but a lot can still be gleaned from this limited scope.
2.
namely: there is a cultural obsession with organizing society. it extends to other parts of asia as well, but chineseness does have a fixation with inventing structure, with dictating every facet of human life, with creating meticulous and intricate systems that resemble million-cog machines; all the little parts (living, breathing people) must perform what they were designed for, and the whole can then function perfectly. a lot of this lies in confucianism. it devises specific social roles and rituals, it calls for conformity and uniformity, it teaches you exactly how to live. confucianist texts (and chinese governing bodies) tell you what your childhood must entail, what your teenage years must be like, what qualifies as adulthood. what marriage is. what a family is and how to conduct yourself within it. here are the exactly defined spheres that make up your entire life like building blocks. there are details, situations that may arise and the correct way to respond, and there are steps. for every person, regardless of age, gender, race, class, etc. there is a guide to follow and stages to accomplish. this is a system for our benefit. we must abide. don't we all want to be good people and live a good life?
3.
it stands to reason that there is an old and enduring conflict within chinese thought. buddhism, daoism, and other chinese ideologies exist to combat this rigidity, this extensive manual to living human life. they assert that surely there is something beyond. surely there is something more meaningful to our time on earth than propriety, tradition, discipline, etc. does this really establish goodness and generate fulfillment? what are the ingredients to human happiness, really? this interplay lies at the center of these 3 major chinese philosophies. (among a multitude of other things, of course, a highly diverse and ancient culture can't be boiled down.)
4.
sometimes chinese stories explore that unyielding and severe, at times cruel, social order. it is the entire world as far as the eye can see. and these stories draw from buddhism (or other beliefs like daoism, mohism, etc.) to portray a way out. to find freedom from that choking machine. how do we escape institution and systems? from a mahayana buddhist perspective, that question is the same as: how do we be happy? and these are the chinese stories that truly, viscerally gut me to the core because i feel it deeply. it feels true and real and earnest. mlc is one of those stories to me.
5.
briefly, this is on a basic level what chinese buddhism is in spirit:
everything in our mortal world is because of 因缘 cause/effect. every event, every emotion, every phenomenon is a result of something else. and this newly-produced result will then go on to become a cause of its own, inciting other effects. it is a chain reaction.
significantly, it is also a cycle. in the chinese eye, in the buddhist eye, all is conceptualized as a process. everything is broken down into step after step, and understood as such. animals have a reproductive cycle, the chicken and the egg. rain exists via the water cycle. and the human being is the most complex creature of all. we are a result of many, many cycles working in tandem all at once. inside our bodies and our minds, the chain reaction is at play, renewal and cessation and renewal and cessation.
this means that everything is always changing, on a level we can perceive and also in imperceptible ways. everything is subject to change, especially ourselves. this, too, indicates everything is a byproduct of something else. everything has a recipe behind it, everything is a batch of different components, baked together to create the cohesive final product. we look at it and see sponge cake, with frosting and edible decorations. we dub it "cake", and forgo the reality that it is egg, flour, sugar, and so on. we place emphasis on the labelled idea of a "cake". so long as we think inside this framework, an instinct that comes naturally to all human beings, nothing is as it appears.
such impermanence & the human urge to depend on such methods of conceptualization creates suffering.
therefore, never be tricked by form and appearance. always look past the veneer, the whole it seems to be. a cloud is labelled a cloud but it is merely a step in the water cycle, water changing forms. matter is a combination of atoms. and our anger, sadness, discomfort is always more than the simple emotion. look closer. buddhism urges you to dissect it. analyze, question, break down. everything in this world is an effect, it is a construct. it comes from something, somewhere. and then remember, everything is subject to change. even society, especially society.
buddhism repeats over and over again. many things feel true but they are not. it feels true that women are inferior to men, but this reality does not stand up to close inspection. why do we think this? reflect on ourselves, what exactly did we intake that resulted in this final conclusion? what ingredients created and perpetuate this form we label misogyny? analyze, and then change it.
buddhism is a cultivation of the self, an endeavour to re-train the mind to think in new, better ways. it teaches how to recognize falsehoods that pass as unshakeable, irrefutable beliefs. how to remove ourselves from it. and how to master our minds towards better mental processes. this is enlightenment. in buddhism, it can mean so many different things. but the concept is most popularly synonymous with 智慧 intelligence, exactly because buddhism prizes the refined mind. one that is no longer stuck believing in falsehoods and illusions.
how do we be happy? we cultivate a different way of thinking from the mainstream, from traditional society. become unstuck from your old self who is entrenched in our world, along with the fraught beliefs it instills into every single person. nirvana is a state of mind. and happiness is freedom, which necessitates departure.
6.
llh re-evaluates his identity and his life, that is his arc. he pinpoints the beliefs he used to hold, that he was so sure mattered. the idea of heteronormativity and the patriarchy seemed so important to him at the time, it was all there was. but then he comes to realize he was wrong, it was all false. he interrogated himself and those ideals deeply, and spent years cultivating a new way of thinking. he also removed himself physically and emotionally from the world lxy inhabited. by becoming llh, he becomes undefinable. everyone else struggles to comprehend him, they are not equipped with the tools to digest the concept of llh.
(the fact is "lxy" was always there. he was just invisible to others because they simply could not properly process what they were encountering. this happens over and over with fdb and the baichuan folks. it is not his physical appearance, in fact he still looks about the same. he is rendered unrecognizable by the gulf between beliefs. by an inability to perceive what they are actually seeing.)
llh escapes but it is not far enough. society catches up to him again, llh becomes parseable to the world all over again. he is once again defined, and defining himself, through the mainstream concepts. uncle, master, guardian. a friend, an enemy. an ex-lover turned friend, a love rival, etc. his identity is contingent on existing in society. and as a participant in society, he attempts to construct his identity through a combination of labels. he allows himself to be perceived, for it to matter how others view and understand him. to let the way they think inform how he thinks too. the way he lives and goes about his life is wrapped up in new versions of old institutions. labels and concepts all over again.
the different combination of ingredients creates the illusion of a different final product, a different person. and to some, that may be the wisdom and change they need to be happy. not everyone needs buddhism to be happy. but llh makes an effort, experiments, looks closer and closer at himself. and he decides it is not enough for llh, so he transforms. he takes all his time and experience, and devotes it towards a new outlook on the world.
the cycle repeats, and every buddhist can only hope that this time the new round would end differently. its impossible to know but it is always worth trying. because this is the road to happiness; this complete and utter egress. the buddhist ideal of becoming a mystery. to become untouchable by that restrictive society and its standards. invisible once again. impossible to fathom because you are not beholden to definite labels. form and a consolidated, concrete, and organized identity is how the others process the world. but you are not what you seem. you are more than what you appear. your form does not reflect what or who you are.
so how do we be happy? it's simple, we say goodbye.
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