The rest of the party: oh man how are we gonna deal with all these goblins??? There’s so many, there’s no possible way we can deal with them eff-
Astarion, already making the most hilarious and on brand decision for the party known to man-kind:
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JOHN "SOAP" MACTAVISH
Call of Duty: Modern Warfare III (2023)
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Funny Detectives crossover!! (VERISON 2!) (Now its bigger!) (And more self indulgent) (With massively varying levels of character obscurity) (Its my drawing and I get to pick the detectives!!!!!)
I love silly and fun shape characters with my whole heart!!!
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He's just like me fr
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[[ All Croissant Adventures (chronological, desktop) ]]
[[ All Croissant Adventures (app) ]]
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made an image and a half, also, gave him the jadon 3 pisas vicariously. i cant afford em
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Everyone likes to poke fun at Astarion when he mentions his nails but you do know why he's like that, right?
He had to punch a hole in his coffin and claw his way through six feet of dirt after Cazador turned him.
Or maybe the time when he was locked inside a tomb for an entire year, months of which he spent scratching his hands raw, desperately trying to carve his way out.
It does make sense why he doesn't want to "ruin" his nails, I doubt he wants to remember either of those moments, and those are the ones we know about.
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I was so caught up in the flood of Astarion content in every other companion‘s tags that I forgot that straight cis gamer guys play bg3 and therefore the conventionally attractive white girl (save me white girl save me) in the group is the most romanced by players 
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