#cal kestis oneshot

[dingusfreakhxrrington]

See It Through

pairing: cal kestis x gn!reader

summary: with thoughts of past rules plaguing his mind, cal starts to question whether he’s doing the right thing.

warnings: cal questioning his relationship with reader, established relationship, a little angst?, mostly just fluff, reader reassuring cal, talk of order 66, mentions of the jedi code

word count: 631

friendly reminder that comments and reblogs are just as (if not more than) important as likes!

“Do you ever think this is wrong?”

You rolled over, cheek resting against his shoulder as you questioned, “This?”

His adam's apple bobbed as he swallowed, his head just barely moving into a nod before his eyes finally landed on you.

“Us,” he clarified, his eyes straying once again as he couldn’t bare to look you in the eye as he questioned everything you had.

It was silent for a moment as you allowed him to collect his thoughts. Then, he spoke again, “I mean- We’re both Jedi and the code… the code says this is wrong. ‘There is no emotion. There is peace. There is no passion, there is serenity.’”

With a sigh, you sat up. This was far too heavy a conversation for pillow talk. “The code said a lot of things, it doesn’t mean it was always right.”

“But what if we’re just playing into the hands of the dark side?”

You looked at Cal as he too sat up beside you, his brows tense as his thoughts ran rampant.

“What if the code was wrong? Nothing good can ever come from suppressing your feelings, trust me. What if it’s part of the reason the order fell? An absence of emotion only gives rise to the darkness, Cal.”

Your explanation was sound but he still wasn’t convinced. More than anything, he was still afraid of the darkness consuming him.

“I’m still having those dreams… The nightmares…”

You placed a comforting hand on his shoulder and admitted, “I know. You talk in your sleep sometimes but that’s not you, Cal. You’re stronger than that, you won’t become an inquisitor.”

He nodded as he let your words sink in but the code still rang through his mind, echoing through every corner.

“Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet the Force.”

He hummed in question, brows furrowing once again as his eyes landed on you. Those were the words of the code but they were different, not as he’d ever heard them before.

“After the fall, I fled. I was in hiding for years but I never gave up on the Jedi, on everything I had been taught. I travelled in search of knowledge. That is how the code used to be, years ago. We were never supposed to ignore or suppress our feelings. To find true balance with the force you have to feel your emotions and learn how to navigate through them, both the good and the bad.”

He hummed again, finally allowing your words to break through. “Control. Balance is about finding control.”

“Yes. Us… We’re not wrong, Cal. As long as we are in control of our emotions, we won’t fall into darkness. Besides, how can this be bad? What we have is good. Love is always a good thing.”

With a smile, his head hit the pillow again and he welcomed you into his arms as you lay back down beside him. “I love you too, you know?”

You closed your eyes, thanking yourself for the moment of quiet before Cal would inevitably drag you back into trouble again. “I know.”

The order had fallen but, by learning from the past, the two of you would build it up again. You’d make it better, reembrace the old teachings but move forward. There was a long road ahead and an empire to topple, but together you’d see it through.

feel free to let me know if you want to be added to or removed from my taglist!

[wrencatte]

mini-fic 3! Cere POV. linguist!Cal, Mantis Crew as Family, Merrin & Cal bonding 1.2k words

“This one?”

Cal squints at it for half a second, says “yes,” then looks back down.

“What about this one?”

“Yes.”

“You didn’t even look!”

“Greez, that’s the third time you’ve shown me that one.”

“No, it – oh, wait, haha, yeah it is. Okay. Let me see….”

Cere watches in fond amusement as Greez goes back to the shelves. Merrin comes over with a tome from deeper within the city library and angles it in a way Cal can look at it without straining his neck. His expression brightens and he takes it, running his fingers over the edges and corners.

There’s a slight twist in the Force that Cere’s beginning to learn means he found an echo. She has to focus pretty hard to feel it so she only pays it enough attention to be sure Cal’s not about to fall into anything nasty – not that she can do anything about it if he does, but she likes to be prepared – and tunes back into the softly murmured conversation between Merrin and Cal.

The Nightsister looks absolutely delighted at having found something in a language Cal doesn’t recognize, all quiet pride and subtle preening. Cere hides a smile behind her hand. Adorable. Cal flips the tome open and the two of them duck heads, Cal underlining a few words with his finger and saying something that Merrin repeats. He shakes his head and says it again. Her face twists in thought as she sounds it out before giving it voice and he nods rapidly, grinning. She smiles back, one of those small soft ones that pops up whenever it’s just her and Cal.

Cere is just about to go back to her own readings when Greez arrives, BD-1 whirling on his shoulder, a book held over his head in triumph.

“Ha! Try this on for size!”

Cal takes the book carefully. “I know this one,” he tells Greez, who groans in disappointment. “But, oh wow.” He flips through a few pages, lips moving as he reads the text silently to himself. “I can’t believe they have a book written in pre-Reformation Gwyrdd’tafodi. Do you know how rare that is? When they switched over, they deliberately destroyed all they could! An archivist hid this away for a hundred years in order to get it safely off the planet. It kept getting passed down the family line until one of them got passage on a ship.”

Greez crosses one set of arms, his free hands on his hips. He watches Cal fondly as the young Jedi’s excitement grows with every page flip. “You know, I would’ve never pegged you as such a gigantic nerd.”

“Jedi were scholars and peacekeepers before they were soldiers,” Cere says quietly. A hush falls on the group. Cal ducks down, shoulders hunching, eyes kept resolutely on the page though it’s obvious he’s not reading a single word. She smiles and adds lightly, “We’re all nerds.”

Cal laughs first, tinged with grief and legitimate delight. He tucks the book Greez brought under the one Merrin showed him, which makes Merrin throw Greez a smirk and for the latero to throw his crossed arms up in the air in a huff. Cere rolls her eyes fondly and catches Cal’s gaze. He grins, unrepentant, enjoying whatever contest is going on between their friends. It gets Cal more books without him getting up, so he’s not going to stop them.

Greez’s frustration is amusing to watch, especially when he snatches BD from scanning the book Cal has open so he can co-opt the droid’s database to help find a language Cal doesn’t know. It’s not helping. BD-1’s database might be filled with years and years of history and culture but knowing the intimate details of a language instead of just a simple dictionary is completely different.

Merrin listens to Cal read out loud for a few minutes, humming at all the right moments, but obviously thinking hard about something. Cere gives up on reading her book and focuses on the two of them, curious as to what’s going to happen next.

“How many languages do you know?”

Cal’s teeth click he stops talking so fast. “I don’t know,” he admits with a shrug. “Sometimes I don’t even realize I know a language until I see or hear it again. Sometimes not even then! It doesn’t always register it as a different language. It’s just…words I understand.”

She tilts her head, expression intense. “Could you learn Dathomiri?”

He grins and quips something in the smokey, gritty sounding language of Dathomir. Merrin’s eyes widen, and then, suddenly, they glimmer with a wetness both Cere and Cal pretend they don’t see.

Knuckles pressed to her lips, she breathes a very quiet, “oh,” before clearing her throat and adding roughly, “Your accent is terrible.”

“Is it though?” Cal asks smugly.

Merrin scowls. “I will teach you more…if you want to learn.”

Cal’s expression softens. “I would love to. Thank you for sharing it with me.” He adds something in Dathomiri at the end that has Merrin abruptly turning back to their shared book, expression pained and grieving.

Cere nudges the Nightsister with a tendril of the Force and gets a small smile in response. They don’t share the same bond as Jedi do, but theirs is enough for Cere to believe her. She settles back in her chair, musing on what her life has become, sharing a bond with a Nightsister, before she shrugs it off and fully intends on finally going back to her reading with Merrin and Cal’s back-and-forth as a background noise.

Except Greez comes back again, the book he carries is much thinner than any of the ones stacked around Cal like a barrier. BD-1 clicks excitedly and Greez is grinning smugly as he waves the book in the air.

“Did you know this place has an unknown language section? Guess who found it!” he all but brags. Merrin frowns, nose wrinkling while Cal laughs brightly and holds out a hand for the book.

Greez slaps it in his hand, earning a scandalized look from one of the librarians. Merrin and Cere laugh as he hunches down with quick apologies. Cal inspects the book carefully. If there are any echoes, they’re soft and quick. He grins.

“Congratulations, Greez, I don’t know this one.”

The latero cheers silently, all four arms thrown up in victory.

Merrin rolls her eyes. “You still lost. I found one first.”

Cal hums. “Best two out of three? This place is open for another five hours.”

The two of them exchange looks for a full second before Merrin jumps out of her chair and rushes into the depths of the library. Greez yelps and follows her as fast as he can without running. Cere hides her face, as though that will keep people from realizing they’re with her. Cal laughs, covering his mouth with his book. His eyes peek over, glittering in mirth. He pulls the book away, and holds it to his cheek, leaning in like he has a secret. Cere can’t help but lean in to hear it.

“I already know the language,” he admits.

Cere blinks at him then laughs loudly – nearly getting them kicked out of the library.

[lothcatthree]

fire still burns in a vacuum

rated T

bode akuna/cal kestis, 1.6k Grief/Mourning, Character Study, Relationship Study, Ambiguous/Open Ending, Author Welcomes All Interpretations, This Is a Study On Cal's Grief With a Twist at the End, Post-Canon, Canon-Typical Dark Themes

A Jedi searching this new place for meaning, but the closest he’s ever gotten is a brush of his fingers against its hull as he blindly scrambles for purchase. Gravity is just as unforgiving as the sharp edges of the outcropping. All this time blurring past him and yet, Cal can’t seem to stop living in the past.

just a little thing I did for the jedi survivor anniversary event!

[breakfastteatime]

(Turns out taking a small break from writing fanfic is a really good way to suddenly have more ideas and energy for writing fanfic)

[candyfloss5000]

Memories

Summary: you recall the memories you have of your lover cal, because it's all you have left of him.

A/N: this is probably one of the worst things I've written and its probably awfully punctuated but whatever. PURE FLUFF/ANGST

--------‐-----------------------------------------

You remember alot of things about Cal Kestis. You remember how he was the first person on Bracca you laid eyes on when you ended up there, the both of you only being fifteen years old. You remember how you would stutter everytime he talked to you, whilst you were too busy focusing on how soft his lips would feel agaisnt your own. You remember the flustered mutual confession of desire for one another. You remember how the only time you would feel safe on the scarpyard planet was in the sanctuary of his arms in the confinement of his single bunk.

And you remember when the Inquistors came, killed the man Cal and yourself considered as a father figure and nearly killed Cal after he revealed himself to be a Jedi...You remember how you were left to pick up the remaining pieces of your life and abandon the planet you considered as your home for the past three years.

But now, five years after the events on Bracca took place, you realise you dont need to cling so desperately onto your fading memories, when the very person who caused some of your most happiest moments now stands infront of you once again.

"....Cal?"

[void-spells]

This is going well

[moonlight-prose]

if this week is kind, three possible fics will drop.

[yiminsuu]

Discombobulated

(adj.) emotionally confused or uncertain.

Pairing: Cal Kestis x F!Reader

Warnings: Sexual themes (+18), violence and blood, angst and fluff, low self-esteem and depression, jealous reader, Cere and Merrin know what’s going on, virginity loss, vaginal fingering, implied smut.

Author’s Note: It’s because of this game that I like Star Wars, and it’s also the first thing I wanted to write since I finished it. If the creators wanted to hype Merrin x Cal, I have to admit it is cute but kinda rushed. 

I always make decisions like this.

Decisions that put me in danger, and the day-- or more like the week started pretty great, until the Nightsister came aboard. It's not that I hate her, she's nice and makes attempts to indulge in conversations and understand humans. I thought Merrin would be a good member given that she is powerful and not easily stressed in mission, but the moment she came... The moment Cal introduced her... I noticed it. I noticed everything.

He's with her every single second, minute, and hour of the day. When Cal came back from his missions she would be the first to welcome him back, with a hug that felt so awkward between the two of them. I sensed it without having to ask, I just needed to watch them. I don't blame Cal, she's bewitching in all the right senses... Except when she tried to kill us. The reason I felt so distraught is that Cal wasn't this attentive to me when we met, and suddenly he's so fascinated by Merrin that I feel... Left aside, or downright ignored by the people I call family. Why am I feeling so awful?

"Is everything alright?" I glanced at Merrin and flashed her a small smile, she didn't believe it and we both know that. "Yeah, I'm fine." I mumbled back.

Little by little, I stopped asking for any aid, I didn't want to partake in the team's conversations and refused to go on more exploring with Cal. I closed myself in my room for many days, only getting out to look for food that Cere leaves for me, I didn't want to see anyone. The Jedi knocks on the door many times a day, but I ignored it, I don't want him to see me in this horrendous state. He pleaded for me to let him in, and promised that whatever was bothering me would only stay between us, I almost opened the door for him, almost... But I stepped back, and he left.

I have no idea why I'm doing this, I just know how horrible I feel when I see them, I can't even stare into Cal's eyes without feeling like someone deserving punishment. I need this sensation to vanish completely, so I set myself ready to go out early the next day, and clear my mind if only for a moment. Of course, I'm not a stealth expert. "Where are you going at this hour, (Y/N)? And alone, you can't go--" I interrupted Cere immediately. "Please Cere, I need to walk, to breathe, to be alone and think of what's happening... I don't plan on bothering you anymore."

Cere crossed her arms after she gave out a gentle sigh, her eyes fixated on me like a worried mother. "You aren't a bother." She started, and for a brief moment, I felt the desperation in her voice. "It's been four days since I've seen your face, and I want to stop you from going... But I won't. (Y/N), when you come back, speak with Cal."

I looked down. "I'll-- I'll see what I can do..."

"Be careful out there." With that, I nodded and ran out of the Mantis.

And this is how I got myself into this mess, with the simple decision of running around alone on an unexplored planet. In a temple in which I just found out my father died many years ago, blood flowed down my cheek and arm as the Inquisitor lays dead under my body, with stab wounds created by my twin swords. If my hands weren't shaking, I would've slashed the body of the bastard several times more for the killing of my father. My pupils shrunk at the merciless thoughts and fell back, away from the inquisitor and the damned red color splattered all over his clothes. "Shit... Shit... Shit..." I whimpered without shame.

The cascade decorating the insides of the temple cleaned the blood off my swords, leaving a sense of tranquility in my chest. I refuse to see this as a victory, no matter how hard I defended myself I ended up killing someone when in the past I always knocked them unconscious. I remember when Cal praised me for my compassion with such an admirable look, my heart fluttered, and millions of butterflies invaded my stomach. I forced myself out of the flashback, cleaned most of the blood from my clothes, and made my way back to the Mantis. This time, I eliminated every Stormtrooper in sight.

I wasn't even close to the vessel when Cal and I crossed paths, he had this expression of gladness that quickly changed to shock when his eyes landed on the dead soldiers. "Are you okay?!" He immediately asked, running to me and staring at the blood which BD analyzed upon setting sight on me. "You are bleeding--"

"It's not mine." I spoke, and poor BD sounded preoccupied. Cal shut his mouth as he looked me in the eyes, which I avoided staring at for long. "What happened? You don't... You don't do this, (Y/N)." The Jedi questioned.

"A trap. It was the only way to get out." It wasn't a lie, I'm sure I wouldn't have gotten out alive if I didn't use violence. "(Y/N)..." He reached out to me but I took a step back. "Cal, please don't..." I walked away and left him behind, but he soon followed to the Mantis, not saying a word.

When I set foot onto the vessel, I was greeted by Cere with a disappointed look and Greez standing behind with interest in what I will say as an excuse. For how long was I gone?

The former Jedi's mouth opened to say something, but every sound that this space has vanished, there was only a void and my heartbeat accelerated. I killed without mercy, Cere and Greez are upset, Cal looked sorrowful beyond belief, and Merrin... The Nightsister embraced me, it took me a while to realize that, and I cried and sobbed in her robes without holding back. "It's okay..." She muttered.

"I know..." I lied.

"Yet you keep crying." I gave up on trying to lie, perhaps all I needed was to speak out, reach someone, accept someone, and trust that their care for me is real. I let out a very small giggle at Merrin's attempt to make me laugh, no wonder Cal likes her.

Hours later, following a warm bath, the chilling night kept me awake and thinking about everything that happened today, I didn't have any other option but to tell them about my father and the Inquisitor. Cal seemed tense after hearing my rambling, and if Cere hadn't stopped him he would've probably 'give 'em hell again', Merrin's words. There was a knock on the door and I let in whoever was outside, Cal walked in and quietly sat on the bed, slightly worrying me. "I'm sorry." He muttered. "I should have been there for you and I'm sorry I wasn't, I thought you wanted distance and I ended up letting you get hurt."

"This is not your fault." I sat beside him and let him continue. "It is, (Y/N)! I wasn't protecting you and I swore to myself I always would! I left you alone!" I didn't expect this from Cal, I understand every person has weaknesses and flaws but seeing him so insecure saddens me. "Cal, it was my choice to go out, we didn't know this would happen..."

"Perhaps, but if I hadn't looked away for a second you wouldn't have raised your swords. You didn't need to go through that hell, not alone, not... Not against an Inquisitor..." I furrowed my brows and took his hand into mine, entwining our fingers slowly but softly. "Thank you for being here... That's the only thing I want. I will be okay..."

"You trust me that much...?" I smiled softly at that and felt him move closer, his grip on my hand getting tighter. "Why wouldn't I, Cal?" We looked at each other and my smile disappeared when his green eyes glanced at my lips. He... D-Doesn't he... What about--?

Cal's lips shut my capacity to think, he's so gentle as he touches me, and kisses me over, and over and over again. When his breath whispers across the nape of my neck, filled with constrained want, my eyes close with a shiver. "W-Wait!" I half-shouted, and the Jedi stopped at once, he looked surprised at the state I was in, the state he put me in. "What about Merrin??"

"What?" He was astonished at my question. Cal then chuckled, the motherfucker chuckled as I was embarrassed for no reason at all, just being like this with him is enough for me to feel everything at the same time. "Now I understand why you avoided us." He said, and I looked away and whimpered when he let out a small laugh. "She-- Well, she was interested in my behavior around you... Merrin interrogates me about how I try a little too hard to make you laugh, the way I stare at you when you're not looking..." Widening my eyes at his confession, I recollect our moments together since we met. "You always want me out of danger, no matter how harmless it can be... Cal, were you the one that placed that chocolate under my pillow when I had my period?"

"I wanted you to feel better..." Cal scratched his head nervously and I felt my cheeks burning up, I placed a hand on his cheek and joined our lips together, slowly, the sensation of pleasure and desire grew. We needed friction, both of us need more, Cal and I need each other. The Jedi lays me on the bed and a hand slips lower, dipping up the underside of my nightgown, trailing his fingertips so delicately against the bare skin of my leg. It is obvious that both of us are inexperienced, but Cal explores, and a voice in the back of my head tells me he won't be going anywhere until he reaches deep inside my soul. Hot breath soothes my skin as his fingers stop close to my undergarments. "Your skin feels so tender against my fingers..." If there was ever resistance on my behalf, I let it fall, head falling back on the pillow.

Parting my legs, his hands slip the cloth away, and seeks out the burning warmth of my cunt. He stares into my eyes as his fingertip traces the soaked line of my slit, watching every reaction, hearing every whimper and moan. He's slow, afraid to hurt me but unable to stop. I mewl when I notice his bulge, how ready and eager he must be for me, and only me. "C-Cal..." Then he pushes his digit deep inside, making me shiver and slightly hiss in discomfort. "I'm here, I won't hurt you... Please (Y/N), bear with me..." My Jedi is so sweet to me.

Cal continues experimenting with my body as he pleases, up to the point of sliding three fingers inside me, my bottom lip wobbled, tears stinging my eyes as he worked his fingers against my walls. He poked something inside that made me feel like I was gonna die. He was a little too excited, and a small cry had him by surprise, looking at me in concern and mouth parting to apologize, I hid my mouth in my hands. "D-Don't stop...!" A breath of relief left the Jedi as he gently reached up to move my hands from my face, kissing me passionately. "As you wish, my princess."

Cal was already working his fingers again, faster this time, my juices were coating him, wet and slightly sticky as he paced himself. My eyes closed as he worked his momentum back up, short and ragged breaths falling off my lips. A whimper escaped me as his fingertips brushed up against that sensitive spot he touched earlier, my hands tightly wrapping around the sheets of the mattress. I was close, squeezing him tightly as he stared down at me.

My eyes widened and I let out a rather loud moan as I felt pressure on my clit, but his free hand is holding me in place by the waist, I can't believe he was using the force on me. "I knew you'd like that." Fuck, Cal!

The power the force is putting on me felt unnatural, and my breath wavered as I groaned out his name. "You're beautiful, (Y/N)..."

He coaxed me into a high that left me shaking, breathless, and tightly clamping down around his digits. The soft noises I was making filled the room for as long as the orgasm lingered, and he withdrew his hand, a small noise of protest leaving me. "Did you like it...?" I nodded and pushed him down to meet my lips. Cal's kisses are full of passion, not once taking his hands off me even if his life depended on it, unfortunately, we had to let breathe. He stood between my legs staring at the entirety of me, and as I glance up at Cal between tears of pleasure, I see him full flushed to his ears, his gorgeous, red hair disheveled, and his bulge leaking precum through his pants.

I chuckled heartily. "Let's take care of you, Cal."

[stardustandash]

Falling Like a Memory - Jedi Survivor

Summary: “This was not his first time in an escape pod after the Purge, nor would it be the last, unless he was either very lucky or extremely unlucky. But this was the first time since then he’d been in one that was so similar.” A little scene expansion for the escape pod sequence after completing the Lucrehulk.

Word Count: 1792

Tags: PTSD, angst, Cal being unaware of his own mental state

If you prefer reading on ao3 this is the link. (Note that it is locked to registered users only)

Escape pods. It just had to be escape pods. While Bode was right, it was the fastest way out of the Lucrehulk, it didn’t make it any easier. Cal’s hands deftly inputted the launch sequence. It was something he’d gone over in his head again and again after the Purge when his hands were too small and shaky to get the input right. Never again would he slip up launching an escape pod in a life or death situation. However, he did not think getting off the Lucrehulk after knowing Dagan wasn’t sitting around on it any more was a life-or-death situation. It seemed more of a confident, if not victorious, then alive and not in imminent danger kind of thing.

They could climb back down. It’s not like they hadn’t cleared out most of the Bedlam Raiders on the way up and set up convenient shortcuts through the ship. Or Bode could jetpack them down. Maybe Cal could hold onto Zee, and Bode could hold onto him, and let the jetpack resist gravity just enough to bring them down without breaking any bones or servos.

Yet he was reluctant to voice those thoughts. There was something about Bode that made Cal want to prove himself. Maybe it was that he was so much more capable, so much more at ease with his place and role in the galaxy as both a father and a mercenary. Not for the first time Cal thought that Bode would have made an excellent Jedi. It would be embarrassing to admit to someone like that he didn’t want to get into an escape pod because the thought of it made him want to throw up with nerves.

At least they would take different pods, even if all three of them, four counting BD-1, would have comfortably fit into one. The doors to the pods opened with a quiet hiss and Cal turned to Bode with what he hoped was a confident grin. Zee gave him one of her awkward, jerky waves behind Bode’s back before confidently strutting in her slow way into the escape pod.

“See you at the outpost,” said Bode as he followed Zee.

“Yup,” said Cal, still staring at the entrance to his own. “I’m coming.”

He forced himself to take one step, and then another. This was not his first time in an escape pod after the Purge, nor would it be the last, unless he was either very lucky or extremely unlucky. But this was the first time since then he’d been in one that was so similar. The Lucrehulk’s pods were nearly the exact same as the ones equipped on the Venators, probably much to the luck and wit of some rich arms dealer. The familiarity sent shivers down his spine, but it would look odd to Bode if he backed out of the launch now.

Hesitantly, Cal buckled himself into one of the jump seats and took a deep breath. This was worse than launching himself into the ocean on Nur to get the holocron back. The Mantis’ escape pods were narrow and tight and different enough that Cal could keep his mind where it was supposed to be. Punching the launch button on this escape pod felt like he was being shot straight into an echo. The escape pod rattled around him. Gravity settled in his stomach with a weightless swoop and with it Cal fell into the memory he’d been trying so hard to push away.

He was thirteen again, crying on the floor of the pod as it hurtled towards the cloud covered surface of Bracca. In his grip Master Tapal’s body was cooling, his empty, half-lidded eyes still staring up at the ceiling of the pod. What could Cal do but scream. His confusion, rage, and grief clawed its way out of his chest through his throat, tearing at his vocal cords and bouncing off the metal walls. He curled into himself, bracing for the impact he knew was coming. The pod lurched, bouncing against the wet ground before sliding to a halt with a bang and a jerk. For several moments Cal sat curled in his seat. He could smell the rain, the underlying copper tang of rusting metal that permeated Bracca and everything unfortunate enough to be on it. Cal didn’t want to open his eyes. He knew what he would see. The same image that haunted his nightmares on sleepless nights; Master Tapal’s disappointed expression frozen in death, the blaster holes in his chest still smoking lightly. No, Cal would rather stay in the ignorant darkness forever than see that again.

BD-1 beeped a question. But BD-1 wasn’t on Bracca. Cal blinked open his eyes to the dim light of the swamp filtering through the muck and grime covering the viewport. At the same time he took a deep breath, feeling the cool air scrape down the rawness in his throat. He was strapped into the jump seat, not on the floor, but he was still curled around himself as much as he could be while strapped in.

He was very glad that he hadn’t ridden in the same pod as Bode and Zee. As he came back to himself Cal felt a surge of shame well up inside his chest. It had been ten years. He’d grown up, become a knight, faced down the dark terror of the Empire and lived. And yet he couldn’t handle a simple, in-atmo ride in an escape pod.

There was a little tap on his knee, and Cal lowered his arms to look into BD’s photoreceptors. How a little droid could convey so much concern without a face was astounding, but BD had always been the most expressive droid he’d ever met. As soon as there was enough room for him BD hopped up onto his lap and nudged his boxy head against his chest. Cal reached out with a shaky hand and gently patted him, careful of his antennae.

“I’m okay, buddy,” said Cal quietly, his voice rough from screaming.

BD-1 called bantha shit with a low trill. Still he snuggled against Cal until he shooed him off to undo the seat’s restraints. When Cal got to his feet, he was unsteady in a way that had nothing to do with the escape pod shifting in the thick swampy muck. By his ankles BD beeped worriedly before using the recently vacated seat as a springboard up to Cal’s shoulders. The familiar weight was comfortable, grounding. It was as if BD was providing a counterbalance to the odd, off-kilter feeling that had settled in his limbs, as if Cal’s brain and body had become two separate entities.

Cal made his way out of the pod and out into the bog. Somehow, he had ended up right back where he started. The little island in the pool of muck. At least the pod hadn’t landed right in the middle of the swamp and been swallowed before he could get out of it. Instead it rested just a few feet from the shoreline. He was about to get dirty, but at least he wouldn’t have to comm Greez to try and airlift him out with the Mantis. He hoped that Bode and Zee had landed somewhere safe, hopefully outside of the reach of the bog or any of Koboh’s more ravenous inhabitants.

The climb up from the edge of the bog to the small hut that rested safely above the muddy waterline was not long, or particularly hard, yet Cal was both covered in mud and exhausted as he pulled himself over the dark rock. He struggled to get his feet under himself, feeling BD hop around his back to try and help him balance.

“Thanks BD,” said Cal once he finally got his bearings.

There was a concerned trill in his ear.

“Just a little tired from that last fight. It’s been a while since I was really fighting for my life against another Force user.”

Five years, to be exact. The same day as his last trip in an escape pod. Cal shuddered at the memory, but kept moving. It didn’t take all that long to reach the little hut, and when he peered inside Zygg and her new friend Wini were still there. The two of them were standing rather close together and through the Force Cal could feel the rather warm emotions from the two of them. Embarrassment almost had him turning on his heel and marching back out, but Zygg spotted him over Wini’s shoulder and gave him a wave.

“You’re back,” said Zygg.

“Yeah,” said Cal.

Behind Zygg, Wini had a slightly put-out look on her face, but she recovered remarkably quickly and followed her over to Cal.

“Did you manage to find Zee?” asked Zygg.

“We did. Bode’s taking her back to the outpost.”

Zygg smiled. “That’s good to hear.”

Her smile slowly faded as she took in Cal’s appearance. Her eyebrows drew close together in concern, but it was Wini who spoke up.

“You look terrible, and the state of your clothes… Well, you will be heading back to the Outpost to freshen up?”

Cal blinked at her, somewhat taken aback.

“Yeah, uh, eventually?” said Cal.

He would eventually go back and meet up with Bode at Rambler’s Reach. Maybe jump in the river first to get the worst of the gunk off himself.

Wini shook her head. “Are all men in the outer rim like this?”

Zygg shook her head at Wini. “What I think she’s trying to say is that whatever you did to get Zee back, it looks like it hit you like a gorocco. Want a ride back? I got a speeder that’ll keep us out of the bog and get back to town in no time.”

Cal looked down at his battle-and-bog-stained clothes and felt the exhaustion that had buried itself in his bones settling in like a weight. BD shifted on his shoulders and beeped into his ear to say that it was a good offer.

“Yeah, a ride might be nice.”

“No worries, I’ll have you back to the outpost in no time.”

“It’s true. I saw her driving here, and I have never seen a pilot so daring.”

BD-1 trilled excitement at the thought, and Cal felt like he should probably be worried. Yet as he stood in the little hut with Zygg and Wini he could feel the shakiness start to fade, replaced instead by exhaustion and an odd sort of emptiness. Maybe he was hungry. Greez could help him out with that. With that thought in mind he followed Zygg and Wini out of the hut to a battered old speeder and they set off back to Rambler’s Reach.

[fanfoolishness]

Rating:

Teen And Up Audiences

Archive Warning:

Graphic Depictions Of Violence

Relationships:

Cal Kestis/Merrin

Cal Kestis & The Mantis Crew

Characters:

Cal Kestis

Merrin (Star Wars)

Greez Dritus

Kata Akuna

Additional Tags:

Post-Game(s)

Grief/Mourning

Depression

Angst with a Happy Ending

Angst and Hurt/Comfort

Angst

Whump

Chapter 3 is up!

-

Cal undertakes a return to Nova Garon, but is devastated by what he finds.

If the Imperials realized he was back, checking Bode’s quarters, they might start thinking about Kata Akuna again.  And he would rather die than have anything happen to her because of him.    Will you protect my little girl? Bode’s question hits him, hard, in the gut.  His stomach tangles up with it.  Hadn’t Bode known him at all by then, after all of his spying, all of his lying?  Hadn’t he realized the kind of person he was dealing with?  Cal was a good person, damn it, a Jedi, someone who would always lay down their own life if it meant helping somebody else.  Cal had built himself back up from a scared scrapper kid to someone who could carry the Jedi title proudly.  To think he wouldn’t protect Kata -- BD-1 taps him on the shoulder, chirruping a question.  Something about his vital signs seeming off.  Cal shakes the question away.  “It’s okay, Beedee,” he says in a low voice.  “I’m just on edge here.”  Who wouldn’t be, creeping back into an Imperial fortress?

[testedtransgressor]

A/N: Wrote this a little over a year ago (I think) and despite it only being one chapter/part (so far), it's had a fair amount of positive attention. Also, I'm a sucker for those "what if the good guys lose?" sort of scenarios. Been ages since I've posted here so I don't know which tags to use, feel free to recommend others.

Set in the final part of Jedi: Fallen Order, during the confrontation on Nur.

-×-×-×-×-×-×-×-×-×-×-×-×-

They weren’t going to escape this. Cal looked around desperately, an idea forming quickly. With a hand outstretched, he used the Force to push one of the windows violently, shattering it. Water flooded into the hallway, and Cal took the opportunity to grab Cere and hurl both of them through the broken window. He could see Vader struggling to hold back the rush of water, and the broken window was quickly covered over by a sheet of durasteel, stopping the flooding.

He was kicking, dragging Cere with him, and shoved the rebreather into her mouth as he looked up. The surface wasn't too far, light still filtering down to them, but he could already feel his muscles aching, and the wound in his side made it all the harder to keep moving. As he glanced back down at the fortress, now a murky shadow in the water, he sensed rather than saw—

Water swirling around legs, alarms sounding, a gloved hand reaching out as the two figures faded into the water, hand outstretched as if to grasp—

Cal felt a pressure at his throat suddenly, slight but growing quickly. His lungs were burning as he kicked for the surface, but his legs weren't moving as powerfully now, and Cere felt like a weight that was pulling him down. The pressure around his throat tightened, and he gasped, feeling water rush into his mouth, down his constricted throat, and now there was a weight in his lungs as he struggled against that pressure, struggling to breathe despite the water filling his chest. Cere slipped from his grasp as his hands went for his throat, which was now so tight he couldn't breathe. He struggled, kicking feebly, choking and drowning all in one as darkness swelled up from below to claim him...

-×-×-×-×-×-×-×-×-×-×-×-×-

Greez didn't like it one bit, the way this witch was messing with things. He was anxious, waiting to see any signs of life on the scanners as he hovered above the water. Cere… Cere was gone. Cal had said so, so it must be true. He had to get Cal, though. That was the most important thing right now. Get Cal, and then get out of there.

Merrin shifted suddenly, rising from her seat and moving quickly towards the ramp. Greez looked around as she did.

“Hey, wait—”

She didn’t say a word as she charged out of the ship, diving off the ramp and into the water. Even as she did, he saw movement on the scanner – tech signatures, crafts moving through the water below. Greez felt his heart stuttering as he began to flip switches, preparing for a fight as he lowered the ship as close to the water as he dared. The exterior cams showed as the water lapped at the bottom of the ramp, but there was no other movement, and every passing second felt like a century as Greez watched the cams, watched the scanners, waited for the inevitable blast that would probably sink him from the sky, and he realised he was holding his breath only when his lungs began to ache for air, but Merrin was still gone—

Two figures broke the surface, and Greez exclaimed a wordless cry of relief as he saw Merrin draw the unconscious figure up with her. But something was wrong – he had expected to see Cal’s shock of red hair, but instead he was seeing Cere’s dark locks. Cere was alive? His relief dulled again as he realised Cere wasn’t moving. Merrin dragged her back up the ramp, scrambling gracelessly, breathlessly, leaving Cere on the floor just inside the doorway while she hurried back to the front of the ship.

"We must leave," she told Greez, "There were patrols sweeping the water. I will perform the ritual again, to give us cover."

"But Cal—”

Greez saw the look she gave him, and his heart sank. No, kid, no.

He sighed heavily, letting his grief flood him for a moment, before he returned to the present. They might have lost Cal, but they could at least escape with their lives.

"Alright, let's get out of here."

-×-×-×-×-×-×-×-×-×-×-×-×-

The steady, rhythmic hum of machinery was the first thing that returned to his attention. The second was the sensation of wide bands of pressure on his arms, chest, and legs. The monotone voice of a medical droid was audible nearby, explaining a diagnosis to someone else, but the sound seemed warped, twisted and distant, muffled at first as his senses started to return to life.

His fractured mind tried to piece things back together. Bogano, Dathomir, temples and tombs, an AT-AT, younglings... Something about younglings...

A mechanical breathing sound, slow and rhythmic, drawing closer, each step like a weight on his chest as he was surrounded by liquid, throat closing, lungs filling with water, darkness reaching out in the form of a gloved hand...

Cal was wrenched back to reality with a soft cry, a gasp of breath, and brilliant light painfully flooded his vision. He could feel the tightness of the bands, could feel them holding him upright on a slab of metal. As his sight recovered from the sudden explosion of light, he felt fear rising within him, building into a wall of terror that threatened to drown him. Sharp, straight lines came into his vision, machinery making itself out against the white walls of the space.

It took him a few minutes to realise he was in a medical room. A window opposite his position gave him a view of a horribly familiar-looking corridor beyond, Mechanical sounds, muted and low, came from somewhere to his right, and even as he strained to see the source the droid came into view.

"Greetings," the smooth, androgynous voice came from a fixed orator, two small lights illuminating briefly as indicators that it was speaking. "I am KJ-46, medical service and assistant droid. Your symptoms indicate you were recently subjected to a severe inhalation of high-viscosity fluid which resulted in a loss of consciousness. You are being treated for these symptoms, and will experience muscular weakness and fatigue for some time as a result."

It sure was informative. Cal closed his eyes, trying to clear his head.

"You have also sustained physical injury from a plasma weapon, which has punctured your left ribcage and left the bone structure damaged."

That explained the pain in his ribs, then. Cal opened his eyes, looking at the medical droid as it scanned portions of his body, the axial beam of light emitting from the photoreceptor sliding over his limbs, chest, face...

"Where am I?" He asked, surprised at how faint his voice sounded even to himself. He regretted asking almost immediately, though, because there was another voice, another person who answered in a horribly familiar, deep mechanical voice. The answer was so spine-chilling, Cal wished he were dead.

"You are in the Fortress Inquisitorius."

[pretz3l-log1c]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Star Wars: Jedi: Fallen Order (Video Game), Star Wars - All Media Types Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence Relationships: Boba Fett/Cal Kestis Characters: Cal Kestis, Boba Fett, The Mantis Crew (Star Wars) Additional Tags: Present Tense, Ambiguous/Open Ending, Pre-Relationship, Boba has more issues than a comic book shop, Cal has trauma but he's dealing, He also has a concussion, That's Not How The Force Works (Star Wars), Well maybe it is, no beta we die like meh, Mistaken Identity, kind of? sort of?, Cal needs a higher relationship level with Boba to unlock his backstory Series: Part 1 of No Small Acts Summary:

The Empire has issued a bounty on Cal Kestis and Boba Fett intends to collect. At least that was the plan until a third party decides to get in over their heads.

[maweallgotohell]

Heyho peeps, I just started a new one shot/ imagines book. It’s not much yet but u might wanna check it out?

Ye bye

[aspentreewrites]

Cal stared ahead as the others bantered, a wave of nausea washing over him. He felt that if he tensed his jaw any further, it might snap.

They were going to be using escape pods.

(A re-write of a short Jedi: Survivor cutscene that caused me pain. Spoilers minimal)

[heaven-s-black-box]

Last Life- ensemble

Return to File

Recovery date: July 28th, 2022

Description: Last Life needs some beta testers...

Notes: An entry from my 2022 research project into the universe of Star Wars. You can find the next entry here.

Word count: 563

Back to directory

Welcome to last life, the winged man had said. 

Ahsoka turned the rules over in her head. They were so simple, you have a certain number of lives that are indicated by a number on your wrist in various colours, and you can’t kill anyone until your red life. Well, and if…, he’d smiled wickedly before moving on. If you’re on red you can’t team with any non-reds, but you can transfer lives. Do with that what you will.

He’d been so giddy throughout his speech, ignoring questions that didn’t pertain to the rules of the game. It made everyone uneasy.

With the conclusion of the rules, he’d wished them luck and disappeared in purple smoke.

That had been nearly five hours ago, at least she assumed. Since then they’d split off into groups to try and map out the terrain. Master Depa had sent a message out not long ago that she and her padawan had found a border, and Obi-Wan and Anakin had found the other side not long after.

“Master Plo?” She asked, slipping carefully through a thin rock passage.

“Yes.”

“Do you feel like we’re being watched?”

Plo Koon looked back over his shoulder briefly before nodding and continuing on into the cave.

Ahsoka’s grip tightened on the wall as a wave of vertigo struck her. She leaned in, trying to steady herself and breathe. Master Plo stepped out into a wider cave, turning back for the padawan.

“Ahsoka?”

“I- I’m-AH!” A searing pain ripped through her head and her vision blurred.

“Oops,” a distant voice said, and Plo Koon looked around trying to find it, “not very subtle, I’ll have to fix that.”

“Ahsoka?” Plo called a little more urgently, reaching out and pulling Ahsoka gently out of the path. He helped her sit down on a ledge. “Ahsoka can you hear me? What’s wrong?”

The padawan sat, doubled over clutching her head in her hands.

Back at spawn, the others had begun to return from their exploration. The jedi began to discuss their findings when a loud bell toll filled the air.

In front of them all, a message appeared.

Plo Koon was slain by Ahsoka Tano.

Slow claps came from behind them followed by a gasp and spluttering.

“What did you do to her?” Plo Koon asked.

He was sitting on the ground, arms braced on his knees, looking up at the winged man.

The others turned around and glared up at the stranger.

“It’s just a curse and like all good curses, it can be cured. All she had to do was kill someone,” he laughed. “Like I said, there can only be one winner, and once you die on red…” he clicked his tongue and made a throat cutting motion.

“Why didn’t you tell us before?” Cal asked, beating Anakin to it.

“Where’s the fun in that? But I will warn you, if the boogeyman doesn’t kill someone…” he shrugged. “Someone has to push the game forward.”

“What does that mean?”

“It means play the game and you can go home. The boogeyman just keeps the game moving.” He clapped his hands and a book appeared in front of the group. “I would go find your friend, she’s a little shaken up.”

He disappeared again, and in the shadows of the world, thousands of purple eyes watch the game of fate and death unfold.

[blue-sadie]

.Avatar.

.Request page.

.Second Master.

Platonic = 🌼 Fluff = 🌺 Smut = 🌹

Lime = ⚘️ Angst = 🥀 Yandere = 🍁

Imagines

I Choose... - Aonung 🌺

The Heat Cycle - Jake 🌹

Evil No More - Jake 🌹

Never Alone - Kiri 🌺

Too Late - Lo'ak 🥀

Wild Animal - Lo'ak 🌹

BFF To Lovers - Lo'ak 🌺🌹

Broken Girl - Miles 🥀🌹

Tied To The Bed - Miles 🌹

Unplanned - Miles 🌺

Run!!! - Neteyam 🌹

Jealous Boy - Neteyam 🌹

The Distraction - Spider 🌺

Demon Blood - Tsu'tey 🌹

Combos

Different Kind Of Lessons - Aonung, Rotxo 🌹

Commanding Officer - Ghost, Köing, miles 🌹

It Was An Accident - Jason Todd, Lo'ak 🌹

Pride And Joy - Jake, Neytiri 🥀🌺🌼

Something In Your Eyes - Jake, Neytiri 🌹

Lust Filled Beasts - Neteyam, Lo'ak 🌹

Second Glance - Tonowari, Ronal 🌺

One Room - Tedros, Jamie, Neteyam 🌹

Drabbles

To Many To Count - Jake 🌹

A Last Goodbye - Neteyam 🥀

Combo

Two Masters Now - Anakin skywalker & Jake 🌹

Oneshots

Is That So - Aonung ⚘️

Dilf Material - Jake 🌹

Eye To Eye - Jake 🥀🌺🌼

The Heat - Jake 🌹

(🍗) Thanksgiving Stuffing - Jake 🌹

Confession Time - Lo'ak 🌺

Only Us - Lo'ak 🥀🌺

Broken minded - Miles 🥀🌹

Tears Of Gold. Prt 2 - Neteyam 🥀

Never Be Ashamed - Neteyam 🌺

Bully As A Brother. Prt 2 - Neteyam 🥀🌺🌼

Spoiled Brat - Neteyam 🥀🌹

Our Love Is Pure - Neteyam 🥀🌺

A Distant Memory - Neteyam 🥀🌺

Back Off - Neteyam 🌹

Five Stages Of Feelings - Neteyam 🥀🌺

Beyond The Shadows - Norman 🌺

Hope - Trudy 🌺

Hidden Surprises - Tsu'tey 🌺

Injured - Tsu'tey 🥀🌺

Na'vi At Heart - Tsu'tey 🌹

Different - Tsu'tey 🌺

What Is This? - Tsutey ⚘️

Badly As My Heart Does - Tsutey 🌹

Intriguing - Tsu'tey 🌺

At Fault - Tsu'tey 🌺

Combos

Lesson learned - Aonung, Rotxo 🌹

Sun Bathing - Aonung, Rotxo, Lo'ak, Neteyam ⚘️

Parents Love - Jake, Neytiri 🥀🌼

Tied Down - Jake, Neytiri 🌺

Chained - Jake, Tonowari 🌹

Hard Stares - Jake, Neytiri, Tonowari, Ronal 🌺

My Our Plaything - Neteyam, Lo'ak 🌹

Temperamental - Neteyam, Aonung 🥀🌺

The Blurriness - Sully Family 🌼🥀🌺

Connection. Prt 2 - Tonowari, Ronal 🌺

Series

Fucking The Nerd - Lo'ak, Neteyam, Aonung, Rotxo 🌹🥀

Modern Day

Aonung x Crush Reader 🌺

Jake x Fan Reader 🌹

Lo'ak x Ex Reader 🌺

Neteyam x Girlfriend Reader 🥀🌺

Spider x Dog Lover Reader 🌺

Tonowari x Student Reader 🌹

Medievel/Fantasy

Knight Jake x Princess Reader 🌺

Worshipper Neteyam x Goddess Reader 🌺

God Neteyam x Offering Reader 🌹

Omegaverse

Unclaimed Omega - Alpha Neteyam x Omega Reader 🍁

I thought- - Alpha Neteyam x Omega Reader 🥀

Crossovers

Stuffed - Anakin Skywalker & Jake 🌹

Unknown Planet - Cal Kestis & Neteyam 🌺🥀

A Bit Feral - Ethan Landry & Spider Socorro 🌹

When Stars Aligned - Stark Reader x Neteyam 🌺

A Gift From The Stars - Togruta Reader x Jake 🌺

Preferences

Alleyway Sex - Jake, Miles, Lyle, Neteyam, Aonung, Spider, Lo'ak 🌹

Breeding Kink - Jake, Tsu'tey, Miles, Neteyam, Aonung, Lo'ak 🌹

Childhood Room - Lo'ak, Spider, Aonung 🌹

Locker Room - Jake, Tsu'tey, Neteyam, Lo'ak, Aonung, Rotxo 🌹

Shower Sex - Tonowari, Tsu'tey, Aonung, Jake, Lo'ak 🌹

They Wake You Up By Eating You Out - Jake, Miles Tonowari, Neteyam, Lo'ak, Aonung, Spider 🌹

NSFW and SFW alphabet

NSFW - Jake Sully

SFW - Norman Spellman

NSFW - Spider Socorro

NSFW - Tsu'tey

Combos

SFW - Lo'ak, Tsireya

Headcannons

How He Asked You Out - Lo'ak, Neteyam, Jake

Yandere vibes - Aonung, Rotxo, Tsireya, Kiri, Lo'ak

Yandere Vibes 2 - Spider, Neteyam, Miles Jake, Tonowari

Their Kinks, Turn Ons/Offs - Tsu'tey, Tonowari, Jake

Tag.List

@greekgods15 @erenjaegerwifee

@sweetirilly @neteyamyawne @laylasbunbunny